#I've been writing this instead of being on tumblr recently

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

The thing with the Mari Lwyd, though, is that it's being... I don't know, 'appropriated' is the wrong word, but certainly turned into something it isn't.

Thing is, this is a folk tradition in the Welsh language, and that's the most important aspect of it. I feel partly responsible for this, because I accidentally became a bit of an expert on the topic of the Mari Lwyd in a post that escaped Tumblr containment, and I clearly didn't stress it strongly enough there (in my defence, I wrote that post for ten likes and some attention); but this is a Welsh language tradition, conducted in Welsh, using Welsh language poetic forms that are older than the entire English language, and also a very specific sung melody (with a very specific first verse; that's Cân y Fari). It is not actually a 'rap battle'. It's not a recited poem. It is not any old rhyme scheme however you want.

It is not in English.

Given the extensive and frankly ongoing attempts by England to wipe out Welsh, and its attendant cultural traditions, the Mari is being revived across Wales as an act of linguistic-cultural defiance. She's a symbol of Welsh language culture, specifically; an icon to remind that we are a distinct people, with our own culture and traditions, and in spite of everyone and everything, we're still here. Separating her from that by removing the Welsh is, to put it mildly, wildly disrespectful.

...but it IS what I'm increasingly seeing, both online and in real world Mari Lwyd festivals. She's gained enormous pop-culture popularity in recent years, which is fantastic; but she's also been reduced from the tradition to just an aesthetic now.

So many people are talking/drawing about her as though she's a cryptid or a mythological figure, rather than the folk practice of shoving a skull on a stick and pretending to be a naughty horse for cheese and drunken larks. And I get it! It's an intriguing visual! Some of the artwork is great! But this is not what she is. She's not a Krampus equivalent for your Dark Christmas aesthetic.

I see people writing their own version of the pwnco (though never called the pwnco; almost always called some variant on 'Mari Lwyd rap battle'), and as fun as these are, they are never even written in the meter and poetic rules of Cân y Fari, much less in Welsh, and they never conclude with the promise to behave before letting the Mari into the house. The pwnco is the central part to the tradition; this is the Welsh language part, the bit that's important and matters.

Mari Lwyd festivals are increasingly just English wassail festivals with a Mari or two present. The Swansea one last weekend didn't even include a Mari trying to break into a building (insert Shrek meme); there was no pwnco at all. Even in the Chepstow ones, they didn't do actual Cân y Fari; just a couple of recited verses. Instead, the Maris are just an aesthetic, a way to make it look a bit more Welsh, without having to commit to the unfashionable inconvenience of actually including Welsh.

And I don't really know what the answers are to these. I can tell you what I'd like - I'd like art to include the Welsh somewhere, maybe incorporating the first line of Cân y Fari like this one did, to keep it connected to the actual Welsh tradition (or other Welsh, if other phrases are preferred). I'd like people who want to write their version of the pwnco to respect the actual tradition of it by using Cân y Fari's meter and rhyme scheme, finishing with the promise to behave, and actually calling it the pwnco rather than a rap battle (and preferably in Welsh, though I do understand that's not always possible lol). I'd like to see the festivals actually observe the tradition, and include a link on the booking website to an audio clip of Cân y Fari and the words to the first verse, so attendees who want to can learn it ahead of time. I don't know how feasible any of that is, of course! But that's what I'd like to see.

I don't know. This is rambly. But it's something I've been thinking about - and increasingly nettled by - for a while. There's was something so affirming and wonderful at first about seeing the Mari's climb into international recognition, but it's very much turned to dismay by now, because she's important to my endangered culture and yet that's the part that everyone apparently wants to drop for being too awkward and ruining the aesthetic. It's very frustrating.

[primofate]

About boycotting Genshin Impact: Natlan skin colour issue and McDonalds.

(Read if you care about these issues and care about what I'm doing.)

If you are only here for a TLDR and want to know if I'm still writing Genshin fanfiction here's the short story: (I appreciate all the encouraging messages and all the love, but I may need to find another platform if things aren't working out here. If that day comes I will surely post over here and let you know where I've gone, but for now, though it is quite unpleasant, I do like and am used to the tumblr format. )

Long post starts here:

Decided to finally say something about this, because I feel like I've read up adequately about things.

First off, to the anon who claimed that I didn't care (who revealed their real identity in my inbox and apologized) I appreciate your bravery and also appreciate the apology. But I'm not going to lie to you, I don't really care for your presence around here, specially after what happened.

About the Natlan issue and the lack of tan/brown/dark skinned colour characters,

I understand why people are upset. I had a conversation with someone about this on tumblr, on how me, myself, I get upset when there is a lack of FEMALE main characters in games (I am mostly talking about the Persona Franchise, the main characters are always MALE, time and time again I always wait for a FEMALE MC, but am always disappointed that it hasn't happened EXCEPT of course, for P3 Portable and P2EP. Finally you had the option to play as Female, but that was it. I mean, it's 2024. WHY is there a lack of FEMALE MC in Persona? Anyhow, that is a different topic altogether.) so I can see how it could be disappointing for POC to see less or even NO characters that are POC.

That part, I totally understand.

All of your actions, boycotting, not rolling, not playing the game, being free to play, I UNDERSTAND all of that.

Now, recently there has been a big issue with Genshin Impact collaborating with McDonalds, because the chain supports Israel (but McDonalds is a franchise... and different owners have different ways of using their ownership of the chain/profit they make off it, so idk how that equals to all McDonalds support Israel. Educate me on this if I'm wrong.) People are saying that they are uninstalling the game because of it.

Again, I UNDERSTAND why you would do that.

I think what I need to address is what I am going to do.

And I'm not gunna lie to you, I don't think I'm going to stop playing the game (and I don't spend much money in game in the first place).

Does it mean that I support the bad situations they've put themselves in or the bad choices they've made? No, but of course there will be people who will say I play the game = I support their thoughts. Can it not just be simply I play the game = I enjoy the game/story?

I am being transparent and I think that's better than some of the people online who keep saying they won't play anymore but you KNOW some of them still do. Like, come on. Don't lie.

If that makes me a bad person according to you judgers out there, then so be it. Who really are you to claim I'm a bad person just because I play a game? Do you know what kinds of things I do in real life? What groups I help out and what organizations I donate to? What really do you know about what I do in real life? Maybe think about that before pointing your finger at someone online, and maybe think about what YOU are doing in real life too, instead of just being keyboard fighters, have you done anything to enhance the lives of other people?

Am I still going to write Genshin fanfiction?

Honestly if I stop doing it, it's because the interaction here on tumblr has been so toxic. LESS people commenting and interacting, I don't really mind much because I enjoy writing in general, I don't do it for you, I do it for me.

I am STILL writing, but at a slower pace because of my real life plus everything that's surrounding the game and the toxicity at the moment. I am even considering not posting on tumblr and just releasing stories like Ruthless Prince, stories that would be available through physical copy or ebooks that you have to pay for (that way I don't get nasty interactions and messages and those who really want to read my stuff can just pay and enjoy it) but as you all know, I'm not money hungry, I still post a lot of free stuff over here, but again, I'm not going to lie, there isn't much reason for me to post on tumblr anymore, specially with all the controversies and attacking going on.

I appreciate all the encouraging messages and all the love, but I may need to find another platform if things aren't working out here. If that day comes I will surely post over here and let you know where I've gone, but for now, though it is quite unpleasant, I do like and am used to the tumblr format.

The End.

[jog-hog]

Siblings and secrets don't mix

Dipper x Pacifica

W/C: 1k+

Summary: Mabel's trying to figure out who Dipper is texting so much and finds out it's a certain popular princess of Gravity Falls.

Note: This fic is pure fluff absolutely tooth rotting also I've never posted a fic on Tumblr before I'm mainly an AO3 user so sorry for any formatting issues!

︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶

Back in Gravity Falls

After the events of their first stay in Gravity Falls the twins are not only well known,semi-well-liked they have friends. Friends that come and meet them at the bus as they pull up, friends that sneak out the house to hang out with them and recently friends that text them A LOT when they're not in Gravity Falls.

Dipper had never been big on the whole phone thing instead enjoying nature whenever possible and appreciating literature and writing but recently Mabel's noticed theres been a significant rise in notifications and a very big increase in him checking them (and him showering has gone up marginally). Mabel knew what this meant.

All signs pointed to pine tree having...a girlfriend ?! Of course Mabel has been in her fair share of relationships so it's not really a shocker but Dipper? She didn't even know someone could like Dipper back!

However whenever she'd try to introduce the topic to their conversations he'd shut it down quickly... suspiciously quickly.

Heres what she knew: they texted ALL THE TIME which means they're probably not in our school since she's also caught him sneaking peaks at his phone in school, they care about Dipper showering and that's about it...he really is a stubborn one isn't he? So obviously she had to concoct a plan, dare she say a plot to look onto Dippers phone and answer the very important question: WHO ARE THEY??

As Mabel sat awake in bed trying to figure out who it was she went down her mental list of potential suitors. She knew they weren't that far, Mabel probably knows them too...

Then a lightbulb moment occured

"GRAVITY FALLS!"

She though to herself jumping up in bed, it had to be. Theres only one person, one possible person: Pacifica Northwest! Mabel couldn't believe it, she always got a vibe from the two but couldn't sell herself on it due to Candy's crush but given she's over it and that the two are texting non stop it just HAD to be Pacifica!

In the morning Mabel awoke to the sound of tapping on a phone, Dipper was awake before her which was abnormal and even stranger he was on his phone! Mabel looked at him and smirked

"Who're you texting lil bro?"

"No one!" Dipper exclaimed going red and hiding his phone away from his twin.

"Aw come on Dip we're twins we need to tell eachother everything!"

Dipper sighs going red, Mabel looks at him intently waiting for him to confirm her suspicions.

"..Well" he starts quietly "come closer I'm embarrassed" he says hiding his face in his hands. Mabel simply walks forward

"Whisper I promise I won't tell mom and dad come on!!" She begged

"I've been messaging Pacifica and..." He begins and stops just as quickly getting visibly embarrassed

"AND?" Mabel continues. "AND I think we're dating" he blurts out quickly like he's ripping a band aid off.

There's a silence until Mabel breaks it

"OH. MY. GOD" she begins rambling a mile a minute about how cute they are, begging to see the messages just to know SOMETHING, her little twin was in a relationship!

Dipper sits there laughing grabbing her after a few minutes of this intense rambling

"You can't tell anyone okay? If we tell mom and dad they won't let us go to Gravity Falls it's only a few weeks away now"

Mabel promises her silence and they go about their lives (with much more drama than once before).

On the bus ride to Gravity Falls Mabel notices some persistent texting occurring right next to her, she desperately wanted to know what they were talking about but Dipper would hide away every time she got close enough to read it. Dipper was being far too secretive about this relationship for Mabel's liking and as siblings she had to be annoying at least once on the bus ride over, at this…this was her calling.

Abruptly she snatches the phone out of Dippers hands and shoots herself to the other side of the backseats on the bus, he immediately yells at her to give it back and chases after her as she kicks him off, she begins reading and exclaims

“‘I MISS YOU SO MUCH??’ OMG ‘I LOVE YOU TOO’” she giggles looking at how adorable their conversation is as Dipper yells at her to stop, she continues anyways (as any good sibling would) until he finally manages to crawl over and grab his phone back. Mabel continues laughing as Dipper pouts.

“You need to stop doing things like that” Dipper says moping and shooting his sister a look.

“You need to stop hiding things from me nerd” Mabel says back, shooting him the same look but with a smug grin on her face.

Dipper still looked a bit upset, she realised she probably went a bit too far by reading it out, her smug smile dropped as she looked down at the ground and played with her sweater.

As the awkward silence grows Mabel pierces it again.

“Awkward sibling hug?” She proposes looking at him with a sympathetic ‘this is for real’ look on her face stretching her arms out toward him.

Dippers face breaks it's serious expression and a small smile creeps onto his face, exhaling and turning to face his sister.

“Awkward sibling hug” he says while quietly chuckling and messing with her hair after the semi-robotic “Pat Pat”.

Mabel laughs realizing they're near their real home Gravity Falls and naturally she takes her opportunity:

“We're close to getting off and seeing your new GIRLFRIE-” she says the last bit loudly even though there is no one on the bus at this point except for the poor bus driver who's had to witness all this. Dipper quickly puts his hand over her mouth and pulls away before she licks his palm (again). As they pull up Mabel notices how Dipper immediately scans the crowd for Pacifica as they make eye contact.

“They really like each other don't they ?” Mabel thinks to herself as she smiles and grabs her bags.

The two can't wait for another beautiful and terrifyingly strange summer in Gravity Falls.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

This thoughts still cooking, so it might not make sense, but I think Thomas (Tomas?) Astruc is a very good case study on how being too attached to your own ideas can hinder your story telling.

I don't mean this in a "Thomas's original idea for the series was bad", but rather that he seems so attached to this concept that he can't stand other people having a differing view from him.

Chloe's the titular example here. Some people thought she deserved a redemption arc, and instead of just saying "nah, I don't think so" and continuing to write her the same way he had been, he had to prove them wrong, prove that his idea was the only correct one, and so turned her into the spawn of Satan and let her rule over Paris for some reason.

Instead of making Marinette less stalker-y, he wrote an entire episode poorly justifying it. And, imao, somewhat diminishing what PTSD actually is and does to people.

I'm not saying he has to make any change (though I think making Marinette less stalker-y would be a good change), but instead of 1.) sticking to his resolve or 2.) taking the criticism, he clung dearly onto this perception of his characters and his writing suffered because of how much he had to twist things to "prove" that his original assertions were right. And also that everyone who disagreed with him was wrong and didn't understand

idk if that makes sense, but the concepts been lingering in my head recently

It makes perfect sense! I've had similar thoughts. It's hard to say for sure, but Miraculous may be a case study in "kill your darlings". I'm not deep into the behind-the-scenes lore and I was not here in the early fandom, but I do know that, at some point, a much darker version of the show was pitched. That's why these exist (image source):

[Image description: two sketches styled like comic book covers. Both have the title "The Mini Menace Ladybug". The left cover shows Marinette's silhouette in a doorway. The door's glass and the glass of a nearby window are broken. In the foreground lies a hand holding a ladybug charm. The hand is limp and surrounded by blood, implying that someone is injured or dead. The right cover is Ladybug doing a spinning kick while looking angry.]

We also have this evidence of the darker original concept:

Jeremy Zag then proposed another project... which he was unable to sell to broadcasters... the project was called "Ladybug". No one was interested, as the project was aimed more at an adult audience... Sébastien had to make sure that the project could be broadcast on Disney and TF1.... Thomas wanted to make a series for adults, but at the time, it was very complicated to make a cartoon for adults. What's more, they didn't have enough money to take on such a project. Sébastien finally agreed, but there were some changes to be made, which Thomas accepted... In the end, Thomas Astruc's entire project was discarded, leaving only the love story between the two heroes and the city of Paris, where the story was to take place.

I've been aware of this darker origin story for a while due to Tumblr and, because of this knowledge, I have often had the thought, "are the writers trying to sneak elements from this darker version into canon?" Because that's the most likely explanation for what's going on here.

If I'm right, then I think that was a terrible move on their parts. They needed to let go of the story that they couldn't sell and embrace the story that they're being allowed to tell. It's why "kill you darlings" is such good advice. Many good stories have been ruined by writers clinging to an idea that ultimately doesn't work for some reason.

It's why the sitcom How I Met Your Mother has such a universally hated ending. The show was originally supposed to go for two seasons and so they wrote an ending that would fit the second season. The show ended up running for nine seasons and, by then, the ending didn't fit, but the writers kept it and left everyone with a bad taste in their mouths, which is not what any writer wants. That's why you have to do what's best for the story even if it means abandoning something that you really love.

This early version of canon may also be why the writers are so obsessed with Marinette. My understanding is that this concept had her mainly acting as a solo hero and, oh look! What is one of canon's biggest problems? Marinette being treated like a solo hero even though she has a partner and, later on, a team!

Not saying that this theory has to be true, just saying that it would explain some things. And if they're poisoning canon by trying to include elements from their darker original? Then it makes sense to assume that they're also doing it for smaller stuff. Like I'm pretty sure I've read that the head writer wanted Chat Blanc to be a lot darker originally, but no one would green light it, so we got an incredibly lackluster episode that spat in the face of the genres Miraculous' is trying to be part of while also falling to have the sort of impact we'd expect from an episode like that. It's a good example of a darling that really should have been killed. It just doesn't fit.

(Totally unrelated sidenote, but is your blog name from Tangled? Because that's what I immediately thought of and it made me smile!)

[sweetmisery]

bet on love | pt.1

summary: a risky bet between Jiung and Intak threatens to damage both their friendship and their relationship with their stylist

pairing: jiung x intak x female!reader

genre: angst, fluff

warnings: conflict, jealousy, mention of injury

word count: 6.4k

a/n: hi!! omg it's been a while since i've been on tumblr but i've recently got back into writing stories and i'm really excited to share some of my fics with you. i'm also open for any request, just go to my profile and send me a message ♡

part 2

It was another busy morning in the dressing room, with the distant hum of fans gathering outside and the buzz of production teams setting up equipment. The air smelled of hairspray and powder, mingling with the faint aroma of coffee from the table in the corner.

You pulled your kit closer, glancing at the schedule taped to the mirror in front of you. Today was going to be hectic - a photoshoot followed by a fan meet-and-greet. Your main focus, as always, was Intak and Jiung. They'd been with you from the beginning, and you'd gotten used to their personalities. But lately, something had shifted.

Suddenly you heard a familiar voice behind you. "Morning, y/n!" Intak strode in, flashing his usual bright smile. He always came in with a burst of energy, like a firework.

"Hey, Intak!" you replied, rummaging through your makeup kit. "You ready for today?"

"Of course," he said, dropping into the styling chair. He ran his fingers through his hair, his eyes gleaming. "You’re gonna make me look amazing, right?"

Before you could respond, Jiung strolled in, carrying his own aura of quiet coolness. He gave a small wave. "Morning, y/n."

"Morning, Jiung," you said, returning his nod as he sat down in the chair next to Intak.

Immediately, the tension was palpable. Intak’s lighthearted teasing and Jiung’s calm, collected demeanor never seemed to match. And when it came to who got styled first, they had turned it into an ongoing contest. You didn’t know what it was about, but it was always the same.

"So, who's up first?" Intak asked, leaning forward in his chair with a grin that looked a little too competitive.

Jiung crossed his arms, glancing briefly at Intak before looking at you. "I was here second, but I think I should go first today."

You sighed inwardly. Here we go again.

"Seriously, Jiung?" Intak scoffed. "You've gone first every other time this week."

"No, I haven’t."

"Yeah, you have!"

You tried to focus on your work, pulling out your comb and hair products, but their bickering was like background noise you couldn’t tune out. Lately, it had been getting worse, and it was starting to affect your flow. You could handle the occasional quip, but this was on a whole other level.

"Guys, I have both of you to get through," you said, trying to sound diplomatic. "Let's just keep it easy today, okay? There’s enough time for everyone."

But Intak shot Jiung a sideways look. "He’s just mad because he knows I’m your favorite."

Jiung scoffed, leaning back in his chair. "That's just in your head."

You blinked, caught off guard. “Wait, what?”

Intak shrugged, smirking. “I’m just saying, I think you like working with me better. Don’t you, y/n?”

Your mouth opened to respond, but the way Jiung’s eyes flickered with annoyance stopped you. Was this more than just their usual banter? You had no idea where this was coming from, but the heat between them was starting to get… weird.

"You’re being childish," Jiung muttered, shaking his head as if he were over it, though his voice had a sharp edge to it.

"Am I?" Intak shot back, still grinning but with a challenge in his tone.

Inhaling deeply, your fingers gripping the hairspray can tighter than necessary. "Look," you said, keeping your voice calm, "let's just get through today. No favorites, no competition. I’ll style Intak first, and Jiung, you're next. Okay?"

You expected them to relax, but instead, you noticed Jiung’s jaw tense as he gave a quiet nod, while Intak looked smug, folding his arms as if he’d won some unseen battle.

Somehow you couldn’t help but feel the weight of their rivalry pressing down on you as you started working on Intak’s hair. What was going on between them? It was like you had become the invisible referee in a game you didn’t understand.

As you ran your fingers through Intak’s hair, his eyes flickered to yours, a little too intense. “Thanks, y/n,” he said softly, his smile lingering longer than usual.

“Sure,” you muttered, focusing on your work, your mind swirling with thoughts. Something was definitely up, but you couldn’t place what.

And then, just as you finished Intak’s hair and was moving to Jiung, you overheard them again - this time in a lower, more serious tone.

"Bet you she likes me better," Intak whispered.

"You wish," Jiung replied, his voice equally quiet, but just as sharp.

You glanced between the two of them, trying to piece it together. They were acting more competitive than ever. But why?

Eventually, you would have to figure it out, but for now, you had a job to do. Even if these boys were driving you up the wall.

The day unfolded with rehearsals stretching long into the afternoon. You were busy touching up the boys' hair and makeup between their practice runs. P1Harmony was set to perform in front of a live audience for a special event tonight, and tension hung in the air, heavier than usual.

Standing offstage, you took a moment to yourself. You watched as the group ran through their set, each of them moving in sync, their energy electric. But your focus kept shifting between Intak and Jiung, their dynamic different from the others. Their performances were as sharp as always, but during breaks, they exchanged glances that felt like daggers, and you couldn’t help but notice how much their rivalry had intensified since the morning.

Suddenly, Keeho appeared by your side. The group leader had an innate sense of what was going on, always keeping an eye on his members, and apparently, on you as well.

"Busy day?" he asked casually, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed.

You nodded, exhaling. "You could say that. How’s the rehearsal looking?"

Keeho glanced over at the stage, his sharp eyes catching every detail. "Looking good, but…" he hesitated, and then with a small smirk, added, "those two, huh?"

Your heart skipped a beat. "What do you mean?"

He chuckled as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Come on, y/n. You really haven’t noticed? Intak and Jiung. They’ve been practically at each other’s throats for weeks. You’re in the middle of it."

You blinked, your breath catching. "W-what?"

Keeho raised an eyebrow, his smirk deepening. "You’re telling me you haven’t seen the way they look at you? They’ve got it bad."

For a moment, you just stared at him, your mind racing. You had always thought their banter and bickering were just part of their personalities clashing, but this - this was something else. "Wait, are you saying-"

"They both like you," Keeho cut in smoothly, his voice casual but filled with amusement. "And they've made it a competition."

You felt your face grow warm, your pulse quickening. "That’s ridiculous," you muttered, but your mind started connecting the dots - the way they fought over who went first, Intak’s teasing comments, Jiung’s more intense glares. Could it really be true?

Keeho shrugged, his eyes glinting mischievously. "If you say so. But trust me, they’re not as subtle as they think."

Before you could respond, Intak’s voice rang out from the stage, breaking the moment.

"Yo, y/n!" he called, waving at you as the group took a break. "Come over here, we need you!"

Keeho chuckled under his breath. "See what I mean?" he said, giving you a knowing look before heading back toward the other members.

Still processing Keeho’s words, you walked toward the stage where the boys were sitting in a circle, catching their breaths. As you approached, Jiung glanced up at you, his expression unreadable, while Intak flashed his usual teasing smile.

"Can you fix my hair?" Intak asked, running a hand through the strands, slightly tousled from the intense choreography. "Gotta stay fresh for the fans."

You nodded, reaching for the comb, but as you moved to stand behind him, Jiung interrupted.

"Actually, y/n," Jiung began, his voice smooth and quiet, "I think my mic might be off. Can you check it?" His gaze held yours for a moment, longer than necessary, and there was something soft, almost vulnerable in his expression.

Your heart skipped again, caught between them. "Uh, sure," you said, feeling suddenly flustered.

Intak shot Jiung a playful glare. "Come on, man, your mic’s fine. She’s busy."

"Just because you got your hair done first doesn’t mean you get to hog her all day," Jiung countered, his voice calm but with an edge.

There was a strange pressure building, their unspoken competition becoming increasingly obvious now that Keeho’s words were rattling in your mind. You crouched down to check Jiung’s mic pack, though you knew it was fine.

Just as you were about to finish, the music director called out for a soundcheck. "Jiung, you’re up! Let’s hear that angelic voice of yours!"

Jiung stood, walking toward his mark, his gaze lingering on you before he picked up his mic. His voice filled the room, soft and ethereal, as the first few lines of the ballad rang out. Every time he sang, you were reminded why you loved working with him. His voice had this pure, calming quality like it could lift the weight of any bad day.

But as soon as Jiung’s part ended, Intak grabbed his mic, his eyes flashing with that competitive spark. His voice cut through the air with bold confidence, his rap fast, playful, and teasing - just like him. It was fresh, a burst of energy that was impossible to ignore. You couldn’t help but smile, your body moving slightly to the rhythm of his verses.

The contrast between their performances was striking, and it reminded you why you admired them both so much. Jiung’s soft, angelic tone that soothed the room, and Intak’s lively, teasing flow that brought it to life.

Suddenly, the music director called for a full group run, and as the boys took their positions, the tension between Intak and Jiung seemed to hang in the air, heavier than before.

And then it happened.

Just as they began the choreography, Jiung misstepped, his foot slipping. It happened in an instant - he stumbled forward, and Intak, too close to avoid him, tried to brace the fall. But instead of catching him, both of them went down in a tangle of limbs.

The room froze. You gasped, rushing toward the stage as Keeho shouted, “Stop! Everyone stop!”

As you reached them, you saw Intak sitting up, rubbing his head, while Jiung groaned, clutching his ankle. The rest of the members gathered around, concern etched on their faces.

"Jiung, you okay?" Keeho asked, already calling for the staff.

You knelt beside Jiung, your heart pounding as you saw the pain in his eyes. "Jiung, let me see."

He winced but nodded, letting you examine his ankle. It was swelling fast.

“Intak,” Keeho said, his voice suddenly serious, “you okay?”

Intak nodded, still catching his breath. "Yeah… yeah, I’m fine." But his usual grin was gone, and his eyes were fixed on Jiung, concern flickering across his face.

Your mind raced as the situation sunk in. This was bad. Really bad.

And yet, you couldn’t shake the thought: Was this accident just that - a coincidence? Or had this competition between them gone too far? The rehearsal room buzzed with tension as staff members rushed to help Jiung. He winced as they carefully lifted him to a nearby chair, his ankle already swelling beneath the ice pack someone had quickly provided. Intak stood to the side, unusually silent, his eyes locked on Jiung as if replaying the moment over and over in his head.

You hovered nearby, torn between concern for Jiung and the strange guilt that seemed to radiate from Intak. You could feel the heat of their unresolved tension burning between them, but now it was no longer just verbal jabs and playful rivalry - something had broken.

Keeho stepped in, taking control of the situation with the calm authority that always marked him as the leader. "Jiung, you’re sitting out for now," he said firmly, addressing the group. "We’ll finish the run-through without him and see how bad the ankle is afterward."

Jiung clenched his jaw, clearly frustrated. "I’m fine," he muttered, though the pain in his voice was undeniable.

"Take it easy," you said softly, placing a hand on his shoulder. "You don’t want to make it worse."

He glanced up at you, the tension in his face softening for a moment. "I know," he whispered, but his gaze flicked briefly to Intak, and something unspoken passed between them - something that made your chest tighten.

The rehearsal resumed, but it felt different now, heavier. The usual energy that sparked between the members was muted, like a fire that had been doused. You watched Intak as he rapped through his verses, his usual swagger subdued. His glances kept drifting toward Jiung, who sat quietly at the side, lost in thought.

The room felt charged, like a storm waiting to break.

When the session finally ended, the rest of the group slowly trickled out, leaving just you, Intak, and Jiung in the quiet backstage space. You busied yourself packing up your equipment, trying to keep your mind off Keeho’s earlier comment. They both like you. The words kept circling in your head, making every glance and interaction between the two of them feel magnified, more intense.

"Hey," Intak's voice broke through your thoughts, startling you. He was standing closer than you expected, his hands in his pockets, eyes flickering between you and Jiung. "About earlier…"

You looked at him, your heart quickening. "It was an accident, right?"

Intak hesitated for just a second too long. "Yeah," he finally said, but his voice lacked the usual confidence you were used to. "Of course."

Your stomach twisted. You glanced over at Jiung, who had been quiet for the past few minutes, still sitting on the chair with his ankle propped up. His expression was unreadable, but the tension between him and Intak felt thick enough to cut.

Just as the silence threatened to stretch unbearably, Jiung tried to stand, wincing slightly as he put weight on his injured foot. "Y/n," he said, his voice softer now. "Could you help me out to the car?"

You blinked, torn between them. "Uh, yeah, of course."

Intak’s jaw clenched, though he didn’t say anything. You took a deep breath, walking over to Jiung’s side. His ankle was propped up with an ice pack, and he looked annoyed more than anything, as if the pain in his foot was secondary to something deeper.

"You really should get that checked out," you said softly, your eyes scanning the swelling with concern.

Jiung nodded, his jaw clenched. "Yeah," he muttered, clearly frustrated. Then, with a quick glance toward Intak, he added, “This wasn’t just an accident, you know.”

Your heart skipped a beat. "What do you mean?"

Intak straightened, his expression suddenly defensive. "Jiung, come on. Don’t make this into something it’s not."

But Jiung wasn’t having it. He looked up at you, his eyes filled with something heavy - something raw. "He wasn’t paying attention. And I got hurt because of it."

Your stomach dropped. You had seen their competitive streaks before, but this - this felt like it had crossed a line. "Intak," you said slowly, turning to face him, your voice sharp with confusion. "What happened?"

Intak’s hands shot up, as if to defend himself. "It wasn’t like that, y/n. I didn’t mean to knock him over. It just… happened."

Jiung scoffed, leaning back in his chair with a wince. "Yeah, well, maybe you should’ve been more careful."

Your pulse quickened, your eyes narrowing at Intak. The playful teasing from earlier now felt dangerously close to something reckless. "You hurt him," you said, your voice lower. "You weren’t thinking, and now Jiung’s paying for it."

Intak’s eyes widened, clearly taken aback by your sudden shift in tone. "Y/n, it wasn’t on purpose! You know me better than that."

"Do I?" you snapped back, surprising even yourself with the sharpness in your voice. You looked back at Jiung, whose frustration was now written across his face. "I don’t care if it was an accident or not. What matters is that Jiung is hurt, and it could’ve been avoided."

Intak flinched, like he had been struck, his usual carefree attitude nowhere to be seen. He opened his mouth to argue, but something stopped him. Maybe it was the way you were looking at him - disappointed, angry - or maybe it was the way Jiung sat there, quiet but firm, the tension between them simmering beneath the surface.

"I… I didn’t mean for it to go this way," Intak finally muttered, his voice softer now, almost pleading.

You weren't having it. You turned back to Jiung, reaching out to help him. "Come on," you said gently, your hand slipping under his arm to support him as he stood. "Let’s get you to the car."

Jiung gave a small nod, though his eyes never left Intak, the air between them still crackling with unspoken words. As you helped him toward the door, you could feel Intak’s eyes on you, a mix of frustration and guilt hanging in the air.

"Y/n-" Intak started, but you cut him off with a sharp glance over your shoulder.

"Not now," you said firmly. "I need to help Jiung."

The words stung, and you knew it. Intak, usually full of quick comebacks and playful banter, fell silent, his expression clouded with something you hadn't seen before. But you couldn’t think about that right now. Jiung was hurt, and that was all that mattered.

As you made your way outside, the cool evening air hit your face, offering a brief reprieve from the intensity inside the rehearsal space. Jiung leaned on you slightly, careful not to put too much weight on his injured foot.

"You didn’t have to do that," Jiung said quietly as you reached the car, his voice softer now.

"Do what?" you asked, adjusting your grip as you paused by the door.

"Get mad at Intak," he replied, his eyes flickering with something you couldn’t quite place. "I don’t want you caught in the middle of this."

You sighed, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear. "It’s too late for that, Jiung. I’ve been in the middle for a while now, haven’t I?"

He didn’t answer, but the look in his eyes said enough. He shifted his weight, wincing slightly, and you helped him into the back seat of the car. As you stood back, your heart ached at the sight of him, so different from his usual calm, collected self. The tension from earlier still gnawed at you, a persistent feeling that something had shifted irreversibly between them all.

You closed the car door and stood there for a moment, staring down at your hands. This wasn’t just about a simple accident, was it? The competition between Intak and Jiung had always been there, lurking under the surface, but today had felt like the beginning of something more - something darker.

And for the first time, you weren't sure how you fit into it.

The days following Jiung’s injury felt like a blur. With him sidelined to recover from his ankle sprain, you spent more time with him backstage than you ever had before. It was strange at first, seeing Jiung away from the spotlight, but the quiet moments between the both of you soon grew into something you hadn’t expected.

You talked a lot - about everything and nothing. Jiung was easy to be around, his gentle demeanor making the hours pass quickly. You laughed more than you had anticipated, sharing inside jokes and teasing each other about little things, like how Jiung couldn’t stand the way the others always left their stuff lying around. And the more time you spent with him, the more you found yourself appreciating his sweetness, the way he always checked to make sure you weren't overworked, and the small compliments he gave without making a big deal out of it.

“You know, you’re really thoughtful,” you said one afternoon, as Jiung shifted on the couch, carefully propping up his foot.

He gave you a shy smile. “I just try to make sure everyone’s okay. Especially you.”

His words warmed you, and for a second, your eyes met in a way that made your heart flutter. You laughed it off, nudging him playfully. “Stop being so nice, you’ll make me soft.”

Jiung chuckled, his voice soft and melodic, the same way it was when he sang. “I’m serious though. You do a lot for us.”

You smiled, but before you could respond, the door burst open, and the noise of the stage flooded the room. Keeho, followed by the other boys, came rushing in, sweaty from their performance and ready for a quick touch-up before heading back out.

The room instantly became a whirlwind of chaos. Keeho was barking out orders, Jongseob was fixing his stage mic, and Soul was already halfway out of his costume, while Theo grabbed some water. It was the usual madness that came with concert prep, but you were used to it by now.

And then, there was Intak.

He was the last one to come in, his shirt already half undone as he made his way toward you. You felt a jolt of something - annoyance, maybe? - but your eyes betrayed you. You couldn’t help but notice the way his toned chest caught the light as he moved, the muscles in his arms flexing slightly as he peeled off the rest of his shirt.

You turned your attention back to fixing Keeho’s hair, trying to ignore the way your heartbeat sped up when Intak came closer. But of course, Intak wasn’t one to let things slide.

He stopped just behind you, his voice low and teasing. “You like what you’re seeing, y/n?”

Your hand froze in mid-air, the hairspray still in your grip. Blood rushed to your cheeks, and you could feel the heat rising. You turned, wide-eyed, meeting Intak’s smirk head-on.

“What- no!” you stammered, your voice higher than intended. “Put your shirt on, Intak.”

But he didn’t. Instead, he leaned casually against the counter, still shirtless, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Come on, admit it. You’re impressed.”

You glared at him, trying to muster up the same annoyance you´d been holding onto since Jiung’s fall, but the truth was, you couldn’t completely ignore the fluttering in your chest. “I’m still mad at you,” you said, turning back to Keeho. “This doesn’t change anything.”

Intak just chuckled, his voice a low rumble. “Sure it doesn’t.”

The moment lingered, and your mind raced. You wanted to stay angry at him, but the teasing, the playfulness - it was just so… Intak. You had always appreciated his energy, but lately, it had started affecting you in ways you didn’t expect. He knew how to get under your skin, but it wasn’t just annoying anymore. It made your pulse quicken, made you hyperaware of him every time he was around.

Jiung, who had been quietly watching from the couch, looked visibly annoyed. He shifted, his gaze hardening as he glanced between you and Intak. “Shouldn’t you be getting ready?” Jiung muttered, his voice edged with irritation.

Intak raised an eyebrow, smirking as he slowly pulled his shirt back on. “Jealous much?” he shot back, his tone still teasing.

Jiung’s jaw tightened, but he didn’t respond. Instead, he turned his attention to you, his eyes softening when they landed on you. “You don’t have to put up with him,” he said, quieter now.

You gave Jiung a small, reassuring smile. “It’s fine, really,” you said, though your heart was still racing from Intak’s teasing. You finished up with Keeho, watching as the boys filed back out for the next round of performances. Intak was the last to leave, throwing you a wink as he disappeared through the door.

As the room settled back into its quiet, Jiung sighed, leaning back against the couch. “He never knows when to stop,” he muttered, his annoyance clear.

You sat down beside him, the earlier flutter in your chest still lingering. “He’s just being Intak,” you said, trying to sound casual, though the truth was, you weren't quite sure what you felt anymore.

“Yeah, well, he’s obnoxious,” Jiung replied, though there was something more in his voice - something that hinted at insecurity. He shifted uncomfortably, glancing down at his injured ankle. “I’ll never be like him.”

You frowned, your heart softening. “What are you talking about? Jiung, you don’t have to be like him. You’re you.”

He looked at you then, his expression serious. “Yeah, but it’s different. You saw the way he was acting - he knows he can get to you.” Jiung’s voice was quieter now, almost vulnerable. “I can’t… I can’t be like that.”

You felt a pang in your chest. Jiung was sweet, thoughtful, and kind in ways Intak wasn’t. They were opposites, but that didn’t make one better than the other. And yet, here you were, feeling torn between them.

You sighed, leaning back against the couch and staring up at the ceiling. “It’s complicated.”

Jiung gave you a sideways glance, his voice softer now. “Yeah… I guess it is.”

The truth was, you were starting to feel something for both of them. Jiung’s sweetness and the way he cared for you was undeniable, but Intak’s boldness and charm had its own pull, one that you couldn’t shake no matter how much you tried. It was becoming harder to ignore the way your heart reacted around both of them.

But there was one thing you knew for sure - their weird rivalry, their competition for your attention, had definitely affected your feelings. And now, you were caught in the middle, not sure what to do.

It was late afternoon, and the backstage area had settled into a rare calm. Jiung was resting on the couch, his ankle propped up, while you worked on cleaning up the leftover mess from the earlier touch-ups. The soft chatter of the other crew members filtered in from the hallway, but for the moment, it was just the two of you in the room.

You had been enjoying the quiet moments with Jiung over the past few days. You had grown closer, more comfortable around each other, and despite everything that had happened, you found yourself smiling more often than not when you talked.

Jiung shifted on the couch, glancing at you as you neatly arranged your brushes. He hesitated for a moment, chewing on his lower lip, before finally speaking.

"Hey, y/n?"

You turned, catching the slightly nervous tone in his voice. "Yeah?"

Jiung sat up straighter, looking a little tense but determined. "I was thinking… since it’s been so hectic lately, maybe we could hang out? You know, outside of work. Just chill."

You raised an eyebrow, surprised but curious. "Like… a break?"

"Yeah," Jiung said, his voice gaining confidence. "Like, this Saturday. We could go to a karaoke bar. I know it’s kind of random, but I thought it might be fun to just relax and forget about work for a while."

You blinked, caught off guard by the suggestion. “Karaoke?”

Jiung chuckled, the tension easing from his face as he leaned back. “Yeah, don’t worry. You don’t have to be a singer or anything. It’s about having fun, not being perfect.”

You smiled, though a small laugh escaped you. “Jiung, I can’t sing.”

“That’s the point!” Jiung grinned, his voice warm. “No pressure, just for fun. It’s a good way to unwind.”

You bit your lip, feeling a strange, excited flutter at the idea. It sounded fun - unexpected, but fun. And the thought of spending more time with Jiung, just the two of you, outside of the usual chaos, made you smile. "Okay," you said, your tone brightening. "That sounds like a good idea. I’m in."

Jiung’s smile widened, his eyes lighting up. "Great! Saturday it is, then."

As you returned to organizing your kit, you couldn’t help but feel a little thrill of anticipation for the weekend. A night out with Jiung, away from the pressure of work, sounded perfect.

But later that day, as the boys prepared to head out after rehearsals, Intak caught up with you just as you were packing up your things. He was as confident and energetic as ever, flashing you a grin as he leaned against the doorframe.

“Hey, y/n,” he said casually. “So, I was thinking… there's this new Marvel movie out, and I was wondering if you wanted to check it out this Saturday.”

You paused mid-action, your heart suddenly racing. Intak had never asked you to hang out before, and the invitation caught you completely off guard. Your mind immediately flashed to your plans with Jiung.

"Oh, uh…" you stammered, feeling your face grow warm. "I, uh, actually already made plans for Saturday."

Intak raised an eyebrow, looking curious. "Oh yeah? What kind of plans?"

The words slipped out before you could think. "I’m going to a karaoke bar with Jiung."

For a second, Intak’s expression froze, and you realized too late what you had said. His playful smirk disappeared, replaced by something darker - jealousy. "Karaoke bar?" he repeated slowly, his tone edged with suspicion.

You felt a pang of regret. You hadn’t meant to tell him, not like that. "It’s just - Jiung asked, and we thought it’d be fun… you know, to unwind a bit."

Intak’s eyes narrowed slightly, and he crossed his arms, leaning in closer. "Sounds like a lot of fun," he said, though his tone suggested otherwise. "In fact, I think I’ll join you guys."

Your heart skipped a beat, panic rising in your chest. "What?"

"Yeah," Intak continued, his voice carrying a teasing edge, but there was a clear layer of jealousy underneath. "No way I’m letting Jiung have all the fun alone with you. I’ll be there too."

You blinked, feeling the weight of the situation crash down on you. This was not what you had planned. You wanted a quiet, fun night with Jiung - just the two of you, away from the usual chaos. But now, Intak was determined to crash your plans, and you knew exactly why.

"But-" you started, trying to find the right words to convince him, but Intak just grinned, his usual cocky confidence back in full force.

"Don’t worry," he said smoothly, standing up straight. "It’ll be fun. I promise not to out-sing you. Much."

You could barely manage a weak smile. "I… I guess I’ll see you there, then."

"Great," Intak said with a wink before heading out of the room, leaving you standing there, feeling flustered and guilty.

As soon as the door closed, you let out a long sigh. What did I just get myself into? You hadn’t meant to let Intak in on your plans, and now you were stuck. The last thing you wanted was for Jiung to find out that Intak had invited himself along - especially since Jiung had clearly been excited for some one-on-one time with you.

And yet, there was a part of you that couldn’t ignore the flutter of excitement at the thought of seeing both of them outside of work. Intak’s boldness and charm always made your heart race, even when he was being insufferable. And Jiung’s sweetness was something you had grown to love in these quiet moments together. But now, the tension between them was more obvious than ever, and you found yourself right in the middle.

You knew you couldn’t tell Jiung the truth - that Intak was coming too. Not yet, at least. You needed to figure out how to handle this before Saturday.

But as the week ticked by and Saturday loomed closer, all you could do was hope for the best.

The karaoke room was cozy, bathed in dim neon lights with plush couches that made it the perfect spot to relax after a long week. You sat back, your laughter still bubbling from Jiung’s last performance. He had come back to the room with soft drinks and snacks, and now he was up at the mic, goofing around with a light-hearted song, making funny faces and exaggerated dance moves that had you giggling uncontrollably.

Jiung had this way about him - his natural sweetness, paired with his quiet confidence, made him easy to be around. Every now and then, he’d flash you a shy smile, as if making sure you were still having fun. And you were. More than you had expected.

The door to the room was still shut, and you found yourself silently hoping Intak had forgotten about this. He hadn’t shown up yet, and the thought of having this time alone with Jiung, just the two of you, felt like the perfect break you hadn’t realized you needed. No teasing interruptions, no rivalry - just Jiung and his easygoing presence.

"Okay," you called out with a grin as Jiung finished the song, "your turn for a serious one."

Jiung grinned, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand. "Alright, alright," he said, walking over to the tablet to scroll through the song list. "What do you want to hear?"

"Surprise me," you said, leaning back into the couch, her heart still light from all the laughter.

Jiung scrolled for a few seconds, then nodded to himself before selecting the song. As soon as the first chords started playing, you recognized it: "Leave The Door Open" by Bruno Mars. The smooth, soulful tune filled the room, and Jiung stepped up to the mic, his expression changing from playful to something more serious, more emotional.

You watched him intently. His angelic voice had always been a favorite of yours - soft, pure, like honey to the ears. But this time, there was something different. As Jiung sang, he closed his eyes, pouring his emotions into every note. His voice flowed through the song effortlessly, and it hit you in a way that made your heart skip.

There was something about the way he sang, the way his voice carried the emotions of the song, that pulled you in deeper. Your gaze stayed fixed on him, watching every expression, every slight movement. He wasn’t just singing; he was feeling it, and somehow, you felt it too.

Your heart fluttered as you listened, your pulse quickening as the lyrics washed over you. You knew this song was about more than just the words - Jiung was telling you something through it, something that had been growing between both of you, something unspoken.

When he finished the final note, the room fell into a brief, charged silence. You couldn’t help but smile, your hands coming together in applause. "That was amazing," you said softly, your voice filled with genuine admiration. "You were incredible."

Jiung gave a small, bashful smile, sitting back down beside you on the couch. "Thanks," he murmured, his voice quieter now, almost shy. "I’m just… really happy we’re doing this."

You looked at him, your heart still racing, feeling a warmth settle in the space between you. "Yeah, me too," you replied softly. "I didn’t realize how much I needed a night like this."

Jiung shifted slightly closer, his eyes meeting yours in a way that made your breath hitch. "I’ve been looking forward to this for a while," he confessed, his voice tender, his cheeks faintly pink. "Just… spending time with you. I always wanted to, you know, just us."

Your heart skipped at his words, your gaze locked on his. Your usual playful banter had fallen away, replaced by something deeper, something real. The space between you seemed to shrink, and for a moment, all you could focus on was the softness in Jiung’s eyes and the way your pulse pounded in your ears.

Both your hearts beat faster, synchronized in the charged silence that followed.

Jiung leaned in slightly, his voice barely above a whisper. "There’s… something I’ve been meaning to tell you, y/n."

Your breath caught in your throat as you watched him, the weight of his words hanging between you. Your heart raced, anticipation and uncertainty swirling together. Jiung’s eyes held yours, full of emotion, and you knew whatever he was about to say would change things.

But just as Jiung opened his mouth to speak, the door swung open.

"Yo, what’s up?" Intak’s voice rang through the room, shattering the moment in an instant.

You flinched, your head snapping toward the door. Intak stood there, grinning as if he hadn’t just interrupted something intimate. He casually glanced around the room, his eyes flicking between Jiung and you as he stepped inside, completely oblivious to the tension in the air.

"Karaoke bar, huh?" Intak continued, raising an eyebrow as he plopped down onto the couch across from them. "You guys started without me?"

Your heart plummeted. You had been so caught up in the moment with Jiung, so close to hearing whatever it was he had to say, and now Intak had arrived, throwing everything off balance. You glanced at Jiung, whose expression had hardened slightly, the softness from moments earlier now replaced by frustration.

Intak stretched out, completely unaware of - or perhaps purposefully ignoring - the charged atmosphere he’d just walked into. "So," he said, smirking, "who’s up next?"

You shifted uncomfortably, your thoughts swirling. You had no idea what to say. The tension between the three of you was undeniable now, and you knew that whatever was happening between you and Jiung, it wasn’t going to stay private for much longer.

You glanced at Jiung, whose jaw was tight, clearly struggling to hold back his irritation. His eyes flicked toward you, silently asking you what to do, but all you could manage was a small, uncertain smile.

"Uh, I guess we could let Intak sing," you offered, your voice sounding far too strained for her liking.

Jiung sat back, his expression unreadable, though you could see the disappointment flickering in his eyes. Whatever he had been about to say was lost now, buried under the weight of Intak’s arrival.

"Alright!" Intak said. He grabbed the mic, scrolling through the song list with his usual easy confidence. "Let’s see if I can top Jiung’s performance."

As Intak selected a song and the music started, you couldn’t help but feel a sinking sensation in your chest. The night had been going so well - until now.

And as you watched Intak start singing, you couldn’t help but wonder: had you just lost the chance to hear what Jiung had been trying to tell you?

to be continued

© sweetmisery - please do not repost my works! ♡

[s1m0nth3swag]

Hello, Simon! I enjoyed reading some of your recent works for Francis Mosses 🥺 is it okay to request for period comfort? keep it SFW please! I'm just in a emotional rollercoaster right now because of it and I don't see much sfw works of Francis here on Tumblr. Thank you so much in advance! 🤎

Tysm for the ask anon, so sorry it took this long!

I've been working on some personal projects recently and have had less time to write (especially since I now have to actually take care of some of my grades because some aren't looking too good.... whatever, though I'm balling through, it'll be fine)

Also, I'm so so sorry this is short because, uhm, how do I write about period comfort when all I usually do is ball through and act like the tough man I totally am (not)

WARNINGS/ CONTENT INFO; GN!Reader but mentioned to be afab due to having Periods, established relationship but not having been together for that long, Francis is a little silly and unsure at first because that man wouldn't know what to do and I stand by that statement.

When you had woken up this morning, you had immediately known. Just that feeling of being uncomfortable, as if your body needed to make extra sure to signal you that you weren't pregnant. You groaned in annoyance, wanting to sleep for a little longer, but if you did that, you'd probably end up having to change your bedsheets, and that's the last thing you wanted to do right now. So, instead, you trotted to the bathroom.

Meanwhile, your boyfriend Francis was absolutely confused. You weren't the type to get up early, especially not when he was staying over. Usually, you'd snuggle up to him, wrap your arms around his waist to keep him in bed with you. He figured you maybe just needed to go to the toilet, though something seemed a little off. He didn't pay it much mind, though, simply drifting off into a state of being half asleep again. At least until you practically fell into bed, making the mattress creak. "Francis." You grumbled, moving to press your face against his neck like you'd always do when he stayed over and was still with you in the morning. "Mm?" He hummed, his hand coming up to carefully run through your hair. "Got my period." You huff, your face scrunching in annoyance. Francis is caught off guard for a moment. "At least you aren't pregnant?" He mutters, trying to lighten your mood, though that only results in having you hit his chest softly. He really doesn't know what to do. He never had to deal with this before. "What usually.. I don't know.. helps? Makes it better?" He asks. Francis has heard of buying chocolate or making a hot water bottle, though he really wants to make sure not to just assume what might be good for you. "Just stay for now, okay?" You ask, snuggling further against him.

The two of you stay cuddled up in bed for a while, with you getting into some, for Francis, very weird positions just to relieve some of the pain. He starts massaging your lower belly at some point, which makes you comfortably rest against him so he can keep going. He figures that this helped your cramps, though you aren't really a big talker right now. He's just glad you aren't getting sappy on him or worse. Francis reminds himself to stop thinking in stereotypes. You fall asleep at some point, and he has half a mind to get a blanket over the two of you while he tries not to fall asleep as well - he feels like he should be awake once you wake up. He wouldn't want to have you have to do something alone when he could be helping you.

The next few hours are mostly you being asleep and Francis drifting off just to jolt awake again. Once you wake up, Francis gets you water and, because you now specifically asked for it, made you a hot water bottle to help the cramps. You put on a movie while he was gone, some romantic one that he knew you had watched at least twice before already. Not like he minded, though. Wasn't his place to judge. He settled beside you again, making sure to carefully place the bottle on you, letting you adjust it yourself. "You alright?" He hums, resting his head against yours. "Obviously not. I'm actively bleeding, Francis." You huff, rolling your eyes playfully as you shift closer to him. "Honestly, though, as good as I could be right now." You then answer, sighing as you close your eyes to bask in your boyfriends presence.

You stay cuddled up like that, watching the movie together. Francis gets up at some point to make both of you a tea, making sure yours is a Green tea after searching for what tea helps with cramps. He's generally just very mindful of you, even offering to run to the store to get you anything you want - which in all honesty almost makes you tear up because he's just too sweet - but you just want him with you, and that's all that counts.

[redbatchedcumbermayned]

It all started under a duvet held up by an oar

Not so long ago I emailed Chris Tester, the voice of Heinrix van Calox in Owlcat’s recently released CRPG Rogue Trader, and asked if he would like to sit for an interview with me. Having some experience in interviewing people I like, most famously Oscar winner and all-around sweetheart Eddie Redmayne, this was not a completely nerve-wracking endeavour. And within a day of sending my email, Chris said yes. And what a pleasure it was interviewing him: Chris was so generous with his time, that the agreed upon 30 minutes turned into 50 minutes as we brushed upon many topics from his start as a theatre actor to his first voice-over role in a video game to his recently discovered hobby of playing D&D. Of course, we also spoke about all things Warhammer 40k, his new found fame brought on by voicing Heinrix and the insights he could share about the character.

I will publish this interview in three parts over the next week in text form and with the accompanying audio file (the audio quality is not spectacular but tumblr limits uploads to 10MB). If you quote or reshare, please quote me as the original source.

Part 2 of the interview

Part 3 of the interview

Fran: Thank you very much for taking your time.

Chris Tester: That's no problem. No problem at all.

F: So then let's start. You graduated in 2008.

CT: I did. Yes.

F: You started out as a stage actor. Did you always want to become a stage actor or an actor in general? Tell us a bit about your career.

CT: I always wanted to be a stage actor. Yes, as soon as I knew that I wanted to be an actor, which probably wasn't until I was a teenager. But yeah, my first passion was always the stage, and that was kind of borne out in my career. I would have been open to TV and film of course, if it had come along, I'm a huge fan of TV and film as well, but I never got an audition for any TV or film work.

I think I literally did about three short films in my 10, 12 years of actually professionally acting, and it is one of those industries where the more you do of one thing, the more you seem to find yourself doing the same thing to a degree. So yes, watching Shakespeare from an early age was one of my first passions.

And that was what first planted the seed of wanting to do it myself. The whole aspect of live performance is still something that I'm very passionate about. Up until 2020, when the world changed, I was trying to do two or three theatre shows a year, but since 2020, I haven't been near a stage and I doubt right now, especially with the way that the UK theatre scene is going, that I'm going to be back on stage anytime soon. I am resigned to that, but at some point in my career, I know I will be on stage again, because I can't live without it, but only for the right thing, both financially, but more importantly, creatively.

F: Your production company is currently on hiatus?

CT: I was the producer of a theatre company, which was run and was the baby of the director of the company, a guy called Ross Armstrong, who's one of the most talented writers and directors that I've ever worked with. I was helping out with a lot of the administration stuff so that he could still put me in plays. Instead of creating my own work because I'm not a very good writer or the best writer in the world, I support those people who will write me good parts. So yes, it is currently on hiatus, but never say never, we would always be looking to get back. It's difficult right now. It's difficult for all of us, because arts council subsidy, that way of being able to fund stuff, is drying up. We were doing a national tour of the UK when we were doing that [with the support of a subsidy]. There's even less money, there's even more people. I won't bore you with anything more than that, but it's kind of tough. We'd like to come back, but in the right way, and that's tricky to negotiate.

F: It's always hard as a stage actor to earn a living.

CT: Well, I've been spoiled by voice-over as well, and whereas when I was in my 20s and 30s then you're all about your art. And of course, I'm still all about my art, but I'm also about my wife and my cat and the mortgage and the bills and wanting to have nicer things to a degree as well. I've come to terms with that and voice-over does facilitate that as well as it opens you up to different roles and working with different people. So, I can't complain.

F: It's quite similar with making a living as a writer, because with a steady income you get used to a certain standard of living and once you have obligations and bills to pay, I think the stress on your mental health being creative and having all the stresses of regular life thrust upon you brings with it a challenge.

CT: It's a cliche we can very easily fall into: if I'm suffering, then it means I'm an artist. And that's not necessarily very true. It very often means that the art that we create only reflects one aspect of our lives, and it's usually a very tortured one. I am also about having wider experiences and broadening myself out. Whereas I think when I was in my twenties, I was thinking a bit more like: Oh, I'll experience the world and life through my art and just purely through my art. Whereas now necessarily I need to have a life outside of it as well, and then I can justify like I have the life so that I can feed my art or not, whatever. You know, I'll be a better artist by having a bit of a life outside of it. Maybe.

F: But that's what your twenties are for.

CT: Yeah, indeed.

F: Doing the crazy stuff, doing the band stuff 

CT: Yeah, yeah, exactly. So, there was certainly an aspect of that in my twenties.

F: So, what brought you to voice acting or voice-over work initially?

CT: Money. Video game stuff is kind of sexy and cool, and I'm a gamer, so that's important. Before I was a video gamer, I was a board gamer and off the back of that, I was a voracious video gamer, partly because I wasn't very good at team sports at school. I was always the person who was picked last in the football team. So that becomes part of your identity for better or worse. But video games, I was pretty good at, not amazing, but I was pretty good at, and I enjoyed it. And it gave me a different form of escapism as well, and off the back of that I always had an interest in them. 

So, the very first voiceover job was a video game: Dark Souls, which is quite a big franchise. At that time, I was your very typically jobbing actor. My acting agent came in and said: I got something for you. And so, I went in with that. But it was only in 2016, 2017 that I realised it was something that you could actually do yourself. People had recording studios at home and they were contacting people directly, not just going through agents. Because I'd basically written to the same 20 voice agents in the UK, mainly in London for like eight years in a row and not received anything. So, you keep knocking on those doors hoping. 

Before I'd even graduated from drama school, I'd burnt a CD and made these cases with my headshot on it and sent them all off at what at the time felt like great personal expense and didn't get anything for eight years in a row.  So, I was a bit like, I'm obviously doing something wrong, but I don't really know what, because I'm doing these workshops and getting good feedback. Then I found out through a couple of online courses, that there were ways and means of doing it myself, and that was a bit of a game changer for me, and within six months of having started, I was earning more through voice work than the bar job and the box office job that I was doing combined. Within six months, I was kind of like: “I gotta quit because I'm actually holding myself back from things.” So that was quite a big shift.

F: Somewhere you said, you started out under a duvet and with an oar.

CT: Yeah. On my website, I do have an image of it. [Dear reader, I could not locate this elusive photo] I literally had to take the duvet off my bed and put it into the living room, which was the quietest space in my then shared flat. I also had to wait until after one flat mate had watched TV and another one had used the table that had their washing on it. One of my flat mates had stolen an oar from some night out and that was perfect in order to be able to erect it over my head and the duvet as a frame. 

I did probably the first four or five months of voice recording like that. Probably about 10, 15 voiceover jobs that I actually got paid for, I was using that because it worked well enough. Since then, I've gone through various different iterations of a setup in the bedroom, to a setup in the hallway, to my current setup. In 2020 we moved to our first house, and this is the spare bedroom which I've had converted into a studio, which means my cat can be here asleep on me or near me getting fur everywhere, but it's fine. I can thrash around and I've got natural light to work in at the same time, which I find quite important. [Pictured below Chris' current setup.]

F: Very pretty. That's good. Guide us through a typical day of yours, if you like.

CT: Oh, sure. I mean, there is no typical day. And yet, and yet, and yet. A typical day for me is, because I am spending the vast majority of the day sitting in this room or somewhere close to this room, because I may need to record at short notice, because the vast majority of jobs are quite short notice. My priority is exercise for mental health more than anything. I've got some weights at the bottom of the garden, and I will get up first thing, and I will go there and I will do that after breakfast. And that's my minimal routine of physical activity done. 

And then I'll come back, and this is so rock and roll. Now what I do is, I spend like an hour on LinkedIn. And that's what you dreamed of as a creative person. Isn't it as an actor? I spend time on LinkedIn regularly every day, because it's a really good networking place for a lot of my types of work, and first thing in the morning, I'm a bit mentally sharper. So that's when I come up with a quick post that may be inspired by a bit of content that I've made elsewhere. That probably takes about 20 minutes and then I spend another 45 minutes to an hour engaging with people and saying hi and introducing myself and asking questions, whether that's with video producers or game developers or documentary makers or pretty much anything and everything. There are a lot of people who are active at that time. And so I do it.

And then after that, if I already have some recording lined up, then I'll prioritise mid-morning, because I've warmed up physically a bit more then, and I'm focused. So, you're going through the scripts, annotating the scripts, recording the scripts, editing the scripts. But then there could be live sessions at any time within that as well. I try to keep hours from nine till six. But occasionally, like with Rogue Trader, that was recorded at various different times of the day because we had people in New York, we had people in mainland Europe, and we had people in the UK. So all different time zones, so that can happen at any time. 

And then I try to do other kinds of bits and pieces of marketing whenever I've got free time to. I do use really exciting productivity hacks, like time blocking. Again, not something that as a creative individual, I was like: Oh God, this gets me so excited, because it doesn't, but it works. It's finding a system that works for you, but still has a certain kind of flexibility and fluidity. I'm trying to make sure that I get outside of the house, and that kind of stuff. 

Recently, over the last year, I’ve started doing audiobooks as well. That long form type of thing is quite nice to be able to dip into because sometimes you don't record for two, three days. You don't get the work. Nothing’s coming in. So, you’re marketing, but it kind of connects you back to the performance side of things to go: I can do a few chapters and you know, that kind of thing. So that's probably it. I try to formalise it, but you know, every voice actor’s day is radically different. There are people, some of the biggest names, going into different studios every week or every day. I very rarely, despite being based in London, I very rarely go into external studios. Like I would say 99 percent of the work I just do from home.

F: So how do you find the right voice for the specific type of voiceover work you do, maybe start with how did you find Heinrix's voice?

CT: Thankfully, Owlcat sent through quite a detailed casting breakdown. So, you get a picture, and that's pretty crucial, as well as a short bio, in terms of the background of the character, but not too much, because you have to sign an NDA, a non-disclosure agreement. But even if you do sign an NDA, I think developers are always slightly hesitant of giving you too much info about the game because things could still be changed. But I think I did get a picture of Heinrix, if not in the first audition, then certainly on the second one. From that you immediately think about the physicality and what might affect the voice, and there was also some direction in terms of what they were looking for. Anybody who has heard the character and me, they do not sound radically dissimilar. There's not a transformative process that I needed to go through, other than his sense of authority and the space that he takes up and the sureness that he has in that he has a kind of divine right from the emperor, so that level of confidence being brought through.

The other part of the audition was about the void ship [the Black Ship] that he'd been raised in and the horrors that he'd seen. And you as the actor have to do the detective work to go like this is showing another side, the more vulnerable side, the side that underpins all of his life choices up to this point. It's essentially playing the opposite to a degree. So it was kind of knowing when to let those elements bleed through a little bit. I think I had probably about a page worth of scripts, quite a lot of script actually to audition with. 

But I don't like to listen back to it a lot, because I think you get into your head. My biggest thing is stage work where it's ephemeral. You say it once and it could be different the next night. The whole point is that there's no one definitive way of doing things. Not quite the same with voice acting, where it's being recorded and you've got to get used to hearing it back. But I try not to overthink it. Just like record it two or three times with different impulses and then review and go like, those two seem pretty contrasting. I'll send those along and hope and then never hear anything back unless I do.

[olderthannetfic]

I always see people who have never been antis, talking about/questioning how some antis even ARE antis when you look at their taste in media - ie the ever famous joke of "Hannigram is #problematique" "but it's a show where he eats people" or whatever.

I thought I'd weigh in as someone who could, hypothetically, be called an ex-anti (which, thankfully, nothing ever really came out of it - it was just very 2014 keyboardwarrior-esque behavior of me being a chronically online young adult who would share posts in a group chat making fun of certain shippers, or reblog posts about how 50shades is The Most Problematic Media Ever to exist -- basically I was an anti with anti-lines of thoughts, but i never, like, a ran a Shipping Discourse Blog or whatever)

For me, personally, it was a few different things. I can now see how it's incredibly hypocritical that teenaged me shipped Light/L, while still thinking that Dramione was Bad And Abusive. It ultimately boiled down to a) being pretentious, and b) just not understanding media or what proshippers REALLY believed, with a side of c) not realizing that nuance exists. like i was pretty late to join tumblr, I think I immigrated here during PEAK "yourfaveisproblematic" era which definitely did have an impact on my opinions and my tastes.

to elaborate, a.) being pretentious. i mean this one just kinda goes without saying. "I engage in media in a way more intellectual way than you do, don't you know that? You're a filthy and disgusting person who writes Snape/Hermione because you're an actually disgusting pedophile IRL who would probably date your own student that you're abusing if you could. Meanwhile, I'm a very smart, good, and pure person. When I read Uncle Vernon/Harry, I'm doing it in a G-d honoring whump way that clearly condemns abuse, incest, and rape. Unlike YOU who only writes harmful stuff as a way to get people off :/"

(as an aside, i think this line of thinking will ALWAYS be present in fandom and popculture in some way, sadly. ie the recent trend of people hating on booktok bc the books are 'trashy' and how these porn addicts should read real classic literature instead.)

as for b.), not understanding media - i cannot emphasize enough that i was GENUINELY stupid and disconnected enough to think that proshippers REALLY WERE pro-All Of The Degenerate Dead Doves That They Wrote.

why did i feel this way? why did i understand that Lolita clearly isnt pro-pedophilia, but for some reason i thought that someone shipping weecest was? well, first of all, i think that fanfiction is (generally) seen as Less Serious than classic literature, and fandom is a fun place, so i guess i somehow thought that every fanfic/fanartist who wrote Problematic Things, especially Problematic Things that they portrayed as Sexy, really DID enjoy the thought of that Actually Happening To Real People.

and i think THIS is the bulk of why antis ARE antis. i'm not calling them all stupid - i do think BEING an anti is stupid, but at the same time, there are people who are truly smart and good-intended people who just have some really off color opinions about, like, homestuck ships or whatever. Lawlight is okay because notebooks that kill people don't exist so it's IMPOSSIBLE for the Harmful Aspects of Light/L to be romanticized! but schoolyard prejudiced bullies DO exist and are a REAL problem so Drarry is BAD (*truly completely unaware of the fact that there's 'realistic' aspects of the Light/L dynamic and 'unrealistic' aspects of Drarry - such as, for example, Hogwarts arguably being even MORE of a fantasy setting than DN is.*) I know that media literacy is the hot buzzword of the year to throw around in 2024, but, like, i really did not have media literacy.

as for c.), not realizing nuance exists - ok "nuance" might not be the best word here, but i dont know how else to describe it. like, each time ive typed the word "problematic" out in this ask, i've done so in a very tongue in cheek/ironic/retroactive way, but, like, those posts about how Everything Is Problematic, Including Your Fave ARE true. and i didn't like the fact that my favorite media or favorite person might've Made A Mistake! i need to Talk About Its Issues Because I'm So Betrayed That My Dear Sweet Comfort Media Would Do This To Me. I Need To Prove I Clearly Condemn It.

like, i legit morally could not justify reblogging a twilight post without adding in the tags '#this is my guilty pleasure it sucks that the books were so racist though' or whatever. Most people were lucky enough to avoid that line of thinking, but there was an actual group of people who felt a genuine need to virtue signal all the time, partly bc, hey, they WERE passionate about talking abt #issues in media, but also bc of a subconscious fear of If You Reblog A Singular Piece Of Hetalia Fanart, You're Literally A Nazi And Will Get A Callout Post Written About You.

and during all of this i was at the tail end of my high school experience (yes i know im younger than most of your audience, ha). i was going through A Lot emotionally, going through a lot of life changes, and lived in a very . . . interesting household/place where i couldn't do ACTUAL good in the world that i was passionate about. so to make up for the fact that i was genuinely in no place to do legit activism, clearly i had to save the gay community by arguing about johnlock queerbaiting or whatever.

^ and honestly i do think that is the position of most antis. theyre isolated and cant seem to do Enough in the Real Scary World so they have to resort to talking about how bad of a person someone is for "shipping abuse", bc theyre not in a situation where they could, for example, ACTUALLY fight the good fight to end abuse or raise awareness for it.

There was way more to it and way more that I could say, if I wanted to, but this post is long enough as it is and probably doesn't make much sense.

I feel bad for antis, honestly, or at least the ones who are antis in the way I used to be.

--

Oh yes, passionate young fools who think they can at least fix the internet if not their lives make up most of the cannon fodder. Some of the ringleaders are just mini dictators and wannabe cult leaders, but most anti-leaning types are just traumatized or clueless, even a lot of the ones who do serious damage and don't just mock shit in private with their friends.

[communistkenobi]

I think a large problem with how we got to this stage of "man is gender neutral" discourse is that a lot of queer people refuse to engage with feminism. I've been seeing it brought up a lot recently, but it's true. Someone who doesn't see a problem with referring to a trans woman as "dude" probably also doesn't believe in patriarchy to begin with. We need to start doing feminism 101 on tumblr again.

I think this is true and I also think this issue extends to the fact that white liberal queerness is the societally accepted conception of lgbtq issues broadly - the fact that pride flags litter the windowsills of small businesses and banks, that lgbtq merchandise is its own market, that western conceptions of gayness and especially transness are the internationally imposed norm (eg, we are pathological exceptions to cishetero society and should be accepted on the grounds that we are scientifically proven to be legitimate by medical and psychiatric institutions, presented with an awkward flair of “okay so we’re not saying being transgender is a mental illness, but it is caused by a mental illness” + framing of gay people as “they’re just like straight people! they can get married and have children just like you!”). Many many queer people of colour have pointed out how much this predominate western framing of lgbtq identity as a “white person thing” (partially because white queer people are just as racist as non-queer white people, also because of aforementioned western imperialism) puts them at odds with their own communities, giving people in those communities a “rational” reason to oppose lgbtq rights on the grounds of resisting western imperialism. Israel’s pinkwashing is a particularly instructive and stark example of this, positioning lgbtq freedom as being contingent on genociding and destroying Palestine - this doesn’t mean it’s okay to be homophobic obviously, but this sort of imperial imposition of queerness as part of the package of western domination creates the conditions for “rationally opposing” lgbtq rights and equality within colonized communities and ultimately causes intersecting levels of harm for lgbtq people in those communities. You can read decolonizing trans/gender 101 by b binaohan if you want more on the subject, I’ve only read the intro so far but it was very instructive (thank you @/molsno for spreading this link around! - she also has a post with a bunch of transfeminist writings if you want more of that). There's also this video by FD Signifier about Dave Chappelle's transphobia that talks about anti-Blackness in white trans/queer spaces and the intense homophobia and transphobia Black lgbtq people face as a result of this that I found insightful if you want to listen to something instead

ANYWAY, all to say - I think the larger problem is that queerness in western contexts (which tumblr is firmly situated in) is overwhelmingly white and liberal, which means that even if these spaces were to incorporate feminist frameworks in their analysis of oppression, they would be incorporated as liberal feminist frameworks, which are fundamentally transmisogynistic and racist, and fundamentally attached to the imperial project of the west (I recently read this article called Beyond the Coloniality of Gender by Alex Adamson discussing some of the problems with western feminism. they demonstrate this through a case study on western feminist objections to genital cutting in certain African countries + analysis of decolonial trans and intersex feminisms more broadly - if you click "show document" in the upper right hand corner of the page I linked it allows you to access the full article).

I’ve always struggled to articulate the exact issue we're discussing, because at a certain point a lack of knowledge is not to be blamed -the larger issue at hand is that the western political + economic apparatus has incorporated queer assimilation into its project. This does not mean that queer people in the west are safe from homophobia or transphobia (see: current transphobic hysteria across North America and UK in particular), but it does mean that white western queer people have incredible political and rhetorical leverage to dominate these conversations using white liberal analytical frameworks, which can only lead to transmisogynist and white supremacist conclusions about the nature of oppression. I think the only way out of these path-dependent "everyone is oppressed by patriarchy" conversations is a larger decolonial political and social project - part of which necessarily incorporates feminist analysis, but feminist analyses that are decolonial, marxist, and transfeminist in nature, and the only way these frameworks can be comprehensively adopted is through a larger decolonial turn

[nadvs]

Hiii love, how are you?? I usually don't send asks to writers on Tumblr, so you're the first writer I'm sending to, yayyy 🤗 I loved loved loved the ending of the Watch and Learn, I loved the entire series. Rafe's growth throughout this series was amazing, you write him so well. Because of all your series, I continue to be a Rafe girly, I thought Cam Girl was your best series but Watch and Learn took the cake and I can't wait for you to finish Both Sinners 😊

You really are an incredible writer and I'm so happy I found your blog, you're always on my most recent blogs bc I check your page sm 😅 I really almost cried when reading the last chapter because I thought back to how Rafe and reader were in the beginning and how they are now in the end 😪 They're literally couple goals, I'm obsessed. Oh gosh, I've already made this so long but while I was reading the last chapter, I couldn't help but think back to the girl Rafe hooked up with and how he had the audacity to msg reader after. If it's not an issue, can you feed my fantasies and write a small blurb on reader getting revenge on Rafe and making him sooo jealous for doing that, I'm petty like that🤣 If you can't, it's no worries but thank you for continuing to be an incredible writer and such a sweetheart and for reading the excessively long msg 🥲 Much love hun🩷 Byeee👋

HI HONEY i’m good tysm, how are you!! you are so so so sweet 😭 i feel honored to be the first writer you’re sending an ask to 🥹 thank you for reading my work and sending such a kind message!! hehe my fav part of writing the last chapter of watch and learn was def sprinkling references to all the things they’ve been through since they met and the memories they made 🤭 i am so glad that you loved it 💘

i LOVE this prompt and absolutely can feed into the pettiness hehe 😌

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

It was bad enough hearing Rafe make a girl moan through your shared wall. It was ten times worse when Rafe texted you “his bad” for the noise.

Followed by an lol. What a douche.

If he’s trying to make you jealous, two can play at that game.

You go to an on-campus bar with friends the following Friday night when you bump into a guy you recognize from one of your lectures. Once you realize he’s hitting on you, his eyes trailing down your cleavage, you feel the exciting twist of arousal deep in your stomach.

You invite him to your dorm. He seems shocked you’re giving him a chance. It makes him even cuter.

Rafe just got home from a night at the frat house when he hears you laughing in the hallway. He figures you’re with a friend or on the phone. Until he hears a male voice under your giggles.

He hears the door shut. Then music. Then… damn it. You’re moaning.

He’d be turned on by the sounds you’re making if it wasn’t for the fact that another man was coaxing them out of you.

You’re on the other side of the wall, body buzzing while he uses his mouth on you. He needs some coaching, but he’s definitely skilled.

You’re exaggerating your moans a little bit, unsure if Rafe can hear. When you hear thudding on the wall, you know he can.

Rafe’s fist is burning as he knocks on the wall, trying to get you to quiet down. He wants to say he’s just annoyed that you’re being loud this late at night, especially after you’re so self-righteous about quiet hours, but he knows jealousy when he feels it.

And this is jealousy.

When you get on top, your moans aren’t as exaggerated anymore. You feel genuine bliss as you ride him, controlling the pace, feeling his hands on your hips.

He’s not a talker at all, so you can’t help but think of the things Rafe says during sex.

Suddenly, the knocking is on your door instead of your wall. You meet your classmate’s eyes and laugh with him, taking a pillow and covering your body with it as you answer the door.

Rafe is standing in the hallway, jaw tight.

“Check your phone,” he says. “I’ve been texting you.”

“I’m… kinda busy,” you laugh.

“Yeah, I can hear,” Rafe mutters. “I think everyone on our floor can.”

“Don’t be jealous,” you tease, hoping he gives it away that he is. When he looks away with a scowl, you’re pretty sure he is.

Rafe can’t take it anymore. He tilts his chin forward, straightening up as much as he can.

“She moans louder when she’s with me!” he half-shouts into your room.

“Rafe,” you scold, nudging his arm. He smirks at you and you shut the door, shaking your head.

After your classmate leaves, you check your phone to see the texts Rafe was talking about.

Rafe: happy for u that ur getting some but chill

Rafe: he cant be THAT good

Rafe: you know i can fuck you better

Rafe: CHILL ur so loud

You laugh at the texts. He definitely can fuck you better. But he doesn’t need to know that.

[gracefulserpent1207]

I feel like people are forgetting that the SAG AFTRA strikes were not JUST about getting better pay for actors and writers. Another very big benefit of the strikes, that is more overlooked than people care to admit, is protection against AI.

The reason why people overlook the damage that AI does to actors (including voice actors) and writers (as well as many others) is because people just aren't educated enough on it and this is because it is being advertised to be this amazing, technological advancement that will save the economy when it's actually the complete opposite. AI is damaging the economy because it is putting so many people out of jobs. Not to mention the fact that strikes are usually concentrated around getting better pay for people, so when uneducated people hear about the SAG AFTRA strikes, they tend to assume that it's because the actors/writers that are striking are just asking for more money (which they ARE doing and which they have the right to do because the pay they get stinks) and so avoid the other, equally important factors.

There are so many cases where I've seen AI being advertised/used in a "positive" way recently. This included a boy from my college mentioning how he couldn't be bothered to do the homework that had been set, so he just used AI to write his homework for him. Are we really seriously going to allow this to happen? Are we seriously going to allow young people to neglect their education and use AI to fake work for them, getting them target/expected grades that are much higher than what they're actually going to get, giving them false hope?

Another example from what I've seen includes an ad on TV for a new phone that used AI with the camera, and boy did this ad piss me off. Part of the ad sees a group of teens taking a picture, in which they are all frowning, with this phone. They then use the AI included with the camera to edit the picture so that they are all smiling. Why? Was it not easy enough to ACTUALLY smile? If not, was it because they genuinely aren't happy? And if that's the case, should we really be sending a message to TEENAGERS to just hide the fact that they aren't happy and fake a smile instead? Use AI to cover up the fact that you're struggling? No. No we should not.

I know a lot of people reading this probably think I'm reaching or overreacting, but AI does genuinely have a long term effect in these cases.

But I think the most common, most damaging example of people using AI that I've seen is from social media, specifically TikTok but other platforms as well. And this is the use of AI voice filters.

The SAG AFTRA strikes have worked hard to benift actors of all kinds, including voice actors, and the reason I'm drawing so much attention to this fact is because people just aren't getting it into their heads how DAMAGING AI voice filters are for voice actors. Several voice actors have already lost their jobs from being replaced by AI that can replicate THEIR voices, the voices that form part (the most important part) of their identity. Not to mention how damaging it can be for voice actors' dignity to hear their own voice coming from something else, especially considering how this "something else" can replicate within MINUTES what they had to perfect for YEARS. Voice actors put so much effort into getting their voices to be perfect for the role that they're playing, yet AI undermines that effort by imitating those "perfect voices" within minutes. Voice actors actually care about their roles/characters and the fans that love these characters. AI does not. All it does is copy. Yet companies would rather have heartless machines working for them than real life people who actually care about bringing characters to life for fans.

And you wanna know what the worst part is?

Apparently, those "fans" would rather hear AI voicing their favourite characters too.

Because it is YOU (the fans) who create, use and/or like AI voice filters on TikTok/Twitter/Tumblr. It is YOU who cannot accept the fact that your favourite character's VA didn't say the crappy line you came up with at 2am that you commented to them on Twitter, so instead used AI to make the character say it yourself because OBVIOUSLY you're gonna drop dead if you DON'T hear them say that line. Obviously, you can't go on with your life without causing a completely innocent and good person to lose their job AND their dignity for your own entertainment.

Another VERY big issue with AI voice filters is that the majority of voice actors whose voices I have heard being used with AI have specifically said that they do NOT support AI and do NOT wish for people to use AI to replicate their voice. Obviously, some people may not know this, but others do and they choose to ignore it. This does not just go for the people who create the filters. It goes for the people who use and/or show support for it too (such as liking videos that use a filter, etc. ) because you are spreading the use of AI and making companies more aware of it and how easy it is to use, and are therefore causing actors to be replaced. How would you feel if you heard your own voice being used by strangers without your consent for their own entertainment?

So for that reason, I am going to say what most people are just too scared to say:

Fans are just as responsible for the SAG AFTRA strikes for using AI as the companies that have been treating actors/writers like shit for years.

If you have EVER created/used/liked/reblogged/reposted/shared/etc. a video that uses an AI voice filter, please please please PLEASE go back and delete/unlike the video, and NEVER do it again. Do NOT interact with videos using AI voice filters AT ALL. If you get a video on your TikTok fyp, it's not that hard to just scroll past and ignore. If you're still not sure what kind of videos I'm referring to, a good example of a popular AI voice filter that I've seen recently that people need to STOP using is a filter of Luz Noceda (voiced by Sarah-Nicole Robles, who has specifically NOT given consent for AI replications of her voice to be used) and Hunter Whittebane (voiced by Zeno Robinson, who has also specifically NOT given consent for AI replications of his voice to be used) from The Owl House singing She Wolf by Shakira. If you have EVER interacted with this filter, please go back and undo however you interacted with it and spread this message to others.

I'd like to end this "rant post" by saying that I am NOT in anyway an actor/voice actor, but I am an aspiring writer. I remember one day earlier this year seeing something on the news about how companies were considering replacing human writers with AI and how in a certain amount of years, human writers may not even be needed anymore, and this scared the shit out of me because writing has ALWAYS been my dream and I thought my future was over before it had even began.

So in conclusion, PLEASE spread awareness of how damaging AI can be (for actors, voice actors, writers, etc.) and PLEASE make sure to NOT interact with it when you see it being used, unless you are asking another person to stop creating/using/interacting with it. And if you see a VA asking for people to NOT use AI to replicate their voice, just do the bare fucking minimum and respect their wishes. Your life isn't over just because you didn't get to hear Luz and Hunter singing She Wolf. Put the livelivoods of other people before your own entertainment. Thank you.

P.s. I'm gonna tag this post with fandoms that I've seen use AI for replicating voices (to spread awareness), especially if a VA from that fandom has specifically asked for it not to be used. Feel free to reblog and add tags of your own for any fandoms that you think I've missed.

[sebastianstanisahotmf]

Too many missions

Bucky Barnes x Fem!reader

A/N Firstly, this fic idea is from a request from @nicoline1998enilocin to reverse the roles of my fic office sex e.g. reader visits Bucky at work. Secondly, comments, likes and reblogs are greatly appreciated and all mistakes are my own so feel free to comment below if you notice any. Also, this fic is gonna have a second part which is just aftercare.

18+ MINORS DNI, FUCK OFF YOU'RE NOT OLD ENOUGH (I WARNED YOU)

Summary Bucky is supposed to be doing his mission reports but ends up doing you instead (lmao that's so fucking cheesy)

DO NOT REPOST ON ANY OTHER APPS/SITES. THE ONLY PLACE THIS FIC IS ON IS TUMBLR.

Warnings Fluff , blowjob, unprotected sex (use protection you are not fictional)

Bucky was missing you to say the least. He had been jumping from mission to mission for the past month and hadn’t been able to properly spend time with you. However, he only had to wait one more hour and then he could give you all the attention you could ever need. 

He was filling in the last of the paperwork regarding his latest mission when he heard a knock on his office door. 

“Come in,” he shouted, not lifting his head and continuing to write more notes on the paper. Bucky still hadn’t grasped typing on a computer and still preferred to hand-write things.

You opened the door and slid in trying not to distract Bucky while he was working.

“Hey baby, I just wanted to ask you if you’re ok.” you sat down on the couch that Bucky had in his office.

Bucky turned his head quickly as soon as he heard your voice. His scowl turned into a smile at the sight of you. 

“Hey doll, I missed you.” he said while finishing a sentence before turning on his chair to face you.

You lifted the bag that was in your hand, “I brought some food for you since you’ve been working really hard lately.”

“You’re amazing, doll,” he said, taking the bag out of your hand. “I’m sorry for not being home much S.H.I.E.L.D really needed me recently.” He added with a sad look on his face. 

“It's ok baby, I know it’s not your fault. Anyways you tell me not to worry when the same thing happens to me so you shouldn’t be worrying either.” 

“I know doll, but I just feel bad for neglecting you for so long and I've missed you so much lately.” He took out the food you made him and dug in like a man starved. 

“It’s ok baby. Really. I know that you’re not intentionally going on missions. Also, I kindly spoke to Fury and he said he’s willing to give us both the next 2 months off.” 

“You know doll, I think you’re the only person I know that can intimidate THE Nick fury.” Bucky says smiling.

Bucky finished his food and you took the rubbish off him and threw it in the bin for him. Then, you got up from your seat and walked over to Bucky who was grinning like an idiot. 

“Come here doll, I need to hug you,” he said while holding his arms out to you.

You sat on his lap, facing him. Bucky wrapped one arm around your waist and placed the other at the back of your head, pressing you further into the crook of his neck. You took a deep breath and could smell the familiar scent of Bucky’s cologne. You wrapped your arms tightly around his waist and he hummed in content. 

After a few minutes, you started to get restless. You were getting aroused from being so close to Bucky especially since you hadn’t had sex with him in what felt like years. And masterbating wasn’t an option since Bucky’s skills had made you unable to cum unless it was him. 

You squirmed around a bit before stopping when you felt Bucky’s hardness beneath you. You looked up to see Bucky’s eyes almost black with lust. He let out a loud groan when you made eye contact with him.

“Doll, I-I-I need to finish the mission report and t-then we can do anything you want.”

“But daddy. I want you nowww,” you whined. 

“Stop whining like a whore,” Bucky said “I’ll fuck you after I finish the mission reports.” He pushed you off his lap and started to unbuckle his belt and open his jeans. “While i'm doing that, you can put that dirty fuckin’ mouth to use.” he pulled his cock out and started to lazily rub it up and down.

You dropped to your knees and crawled under the desk. Bucky rolled his chair under the desk, right in front of you. 

“All right doll, you know what to do.”

You shuffled closer and replaced Bucky’s hand with yours. You leaned closer and licked a stripe up the underside of his dick, repeating the action again before taking the rounded head into your mouth. This made Bucky let out a loud moan which made you suck harder. Then, you took his member deeper into your mouth until it hit the back of your throat which made you gag. 

“That’s it baby. Such a good girl,” Bucky groaned, stroking your head softly. 

Then, you hear a knock at the door. Bucky looks down at you with a grin on his face and then tells whoever it is to come in. He allows you to take one last deep breath before pushing you down.

 

Steve walked into the room and was oblivious to you with a mouthful of his best friend's cock. 

“Hey Buck, how much longer are you going to be because you need to hand in your mission reports today and it's already 10pm.” 

“I’ve got a f-few more notes to add and then I’m done, punk.” Bucky replied, clenching his fist. 

“Jerk,” Steve responded, as he exited the room. 

Bucky let out a groan as you took him all the way down now that you didn’t have an audience. 

“Doll, I need to be inside you right now,” Bucky said.

He grabbed your hair and pulled you off him before moving back on his chair so that he could pick you up. You wrapped your legs around his waist. He placed you on his desk and started to take his clothes off as you did the same.

 

When you were both naked, Bucky leaned forward to meet your lips in a kiss. It was all teeth and tongue since you haven't been able to be intimate with each other for way too long. You brought a hand up to Bucky’s face and cupped his cheek, a strangely sweet gesture for such a filthy kiss. 

“Daddy, please. I need you inside me. Please,” you begged.

“One second doll,”

Bucky grabbed your hips and pulled you to the edge of the desk. He grabbed his cock and rubbed it up and down your folds. 

“Please daddy! Fuck me!” you whined. 

Bucky just smirked before leaning forwards and pushing his dick inside you with one smooth thrust. He didn’t give you a chance to adjust before violently thrusting into you. All sense of self control had instantly dissipated the second he entered you. 

“Doll, you feel so good. So fuckin’ good” Bucky groaned. 

He put both your legs on his shoulders and leaned forwards. From this position he could reach the deepest parts of you. He reached his hand down and started to rub your swollen clit. 

“Gonna cum, m’ gonna cum,” you shouted, your legs starting to shake. 

“Cum for me doll, come on. Show daddy how good his fat cock is making you feel.” Bucky said.

Your legs had started to shake and Bucky’s thrusts were starting to become sloppy. Your vision had started to blur and you could feel your orgasm crash into you. You let out a pornographic moan and was trying to writhe away from Bucky’s hand which continued to rub your clit and extend your high. 

“Gonna cum in you baby, gonna pump you full of my cum,” Bucky let out a loud moan before stilling and filling you with his seed. 

Bucky leaned back to let your legs fall from his shoulders. He leaned forwards and rested his forehead against your breasts as you ran your fingers through his hair. A few minutes passed and then Bucky pulled away. You whined at the loss of contact. Bucky grabbed the hoodie he was wearing and helped you put it on…..

Taglist: @buckys-wintersoldier @nicoline1998enilocin

Also if you want to see posts I reblog just follow @sebastianstanisahotmf-reblogs

[mysteria157]

hello hello mystie 🩷 bon has decided to visit you once again.

i am recently going through quite some turbulence with my writing. i have been working on a aot reiner piece for quite some time but it's been feeling rather... unfulfilling? i guess i just want to open up a bit.

as a black woman, i've seen a number of posts on here of other woc having takes about how we should 'embrace our blackness' and write our fics in a way that reflects that. i always understood that this is a valid opinion, as we are often pushed by society to 'calm' ourselves down and water down our personalities and our way of speaking (often not to fall subject to a number of disheartening stereotypes.)

but i've come to a more different, personal conclusion over the past few months. i am a black south african girl who grew up watching british cartoons in order to learn english. my mother took me to a catholic school where english was the language of instruction and we had a similar education system as most british schools (colonisation has a role in this system but that's a discussion for another day.)

i've always been called 'whitewashed' as i am fluent in the language. there's still heavy racial tension where i'm from, so ever since i was little i was compared to speaking as a white person. a 'coconut' if we want to go that far, lol.

besides this, we've become more westernised and my peers around me began to see the struggle of african americans as our own (since we're all experiencing the same biases and discrimination as poc.) now for some reason, seeing the takes of other woc made me feel as if the way i write and speak was incorrect. i felt like a phony, like someone who was dodging away from racism by writing like a 'white person' to stay unattacked.

to cut this short (as this has already been quite long), your writing put things into perspective for me. it might not be 'that deep' but seeing another black woman write and speak similar to myself has healed a small part of me. not only is your writing excellent, but it makes me feel as if that i don't have to pretend to be the stereotypical black writer all the time.

that my way of writing does not make me any less 'black'. i now know exactly how i want to create stories and write them down, as i always could've done.

thank you for being the talented individual that you are. love you lots.

-Bonnie 🩷

Hello my beautiful, Bonnie 💕

I apologize for the delay, I’ve been traveling for work so my activity on Tumblr has been low recently.

It’s a weird sensation of fate to read your post, because I resonate with your thoughts deeply. Growing up as a military child, I moved frequently, so I never really had a “home” like others. The friends that I had were all military children too and made up a melting pot of race, diversity, and background. I did not have a primarily black friend group and because of this, others often made fun of me for not being “black” enough. The way I spoke, wrote, dressed, and my mannerisms were all representative of a “whitewashed” version of a black woman. The concept of whitewashed is a topic for another day 😒

I’ve dealt with being called an “inside out Oreo”and constantly heard the annoying micro-aggression of “talking really well for someone like myself.” And for years it bothered me more that I wanted to feel and act like others, instead of embracing myself. Thankfully, I got over that.

Joining Tumblr and finding a community of black writers has been a great experience, and I definitely agree that we should ‘embrace our blackness’, but embrace it in a way that represents YOU. Not everyone else.

For myself, I embrace with what I write about, not necessarily how I write. Because I write how I think and talk, but I try to share plot and experiences that normally resonate with who I am as a black woman. Cookouts, extended family mannerisms and traditions, how I do my hair and take care of my skin, etc.

You are not a phony and you are not ‘whitewashed’. You’re Bonnie, and Bonnie writes how Bonnie speaks, acts, and feels. Period.

In my opinion, trying to write a certain way to appeal to someone else only takes away from your own authenticity. This isn’t to invalidate someone else’s experience, but you shouldn’t have to pretend to embrace your ‘blackness’. Being able to overcome this feeling is such a strength that you should continue to hold close 💕

Girl, look at me rambling LMFAO. THE POINT IS, I’m so happy that I was able to help you embrace more of who you are. I’m happy that you enjoy my words. I’m happy that you have the strength to create how you want. And I’m just…really happy for meeting you 🥹

Create your stories however you want. As long as Bonnie is happy and Bonnie is enjoying it and Bonnie is not intentionally hurting others, that’s all that should matter.

Love you lots as well. Thank you for being the beautiful mootie that you are 💕😘

[tallulah477]

Below the cut contains my thoughts and feelings about certain issues that I've seen recently that I feel like need to be addressed including hate/bullying, the new Neteyam & Lo'ak rp blogs, and the general fandom as a whole.

CW:// Mentions of pedophilia, predators, racism, and homophobia

Over the past several months, and especially over these past several days, it's come to my attention that we as a fandom need to make some things abundantly clear.

I was a silent reader for a long time. I love Avatar and this fandom with my entire heart and I wanted nothing more than to be an active part of it and member of the community, but the thing that stopped me for a long time was seeing how hateful people can be and I wasn't sure if I could handle it. Obviously, I decided that my happiness and sharing my love for Avatar and the characters with other people who love it as much as I do is more important than any nasty messages I might get and I couldn't be happier with my decision. I think I can safely say that most of us here in the fandom can say the same (although I'm sure the feeling of happiness comes with endless ebbs and flows for all of us).

That being said, the amount of sheer bullshit that I've been seeing on here is ridiculous.

The amount of hate messages that I've had to witness my mutuals receive is unacceptable. The amount of hounding as to why someone unfollowed this person, why aren't they interacting with this person anymore, why would someone write something like this, why won't you write this, is crazy to see. I've seen racist comments, I've seen homophobic comments, and I've seen people being called a pedophile wayyyy to often now.

This is Tumblr. We are responsible for our own media consumption. We cultivate our own media experience.

That means authors write what they enjoy regardless of content as long as they are responsible and tag the work correctly. You as the reader are responsible for heeding those warnings.

This means that if two people who used to interact or follow each other all of a sudden don't or someone gets blocked, it is no one's business as to why it happened. They don't owe you an explanation and there's no need to publicize drama. Do not go into their inboxes asking for details because all that does is feed the flames.

This is supposed to be people's happy place. Our safe space. And instead it seems like there's something new happening every single day.

At this point, we've all seen the rp blogs that have popped up. I'm not generally someone who enjoys rp so I didn't interact, but I saw a ton of my mutuals and others having a great time with them. Despite me not liking rp, it was exciting to see at first. A live persona of one of my most beloved characters interacting with fics that I love? Yes, it's definitely exciting to see!

But then it got not so exciting to see. The responses seemed solely sexual and out of character for Neteyam, a lot of them were really dark and borderline violent. I like dark fics, and I love dark Neteyam. But there are warnings to every dark fic and you go into them knowing what to expect. For a blog that's rp-ing a character that's not canonically like that, it was concerning to see.

We've had issues in this fandom in the past with predators. And despite us all being adults here (at least we should all be), you can never be too careful when it comes to the internet. I am NOT saying that the people running these blogs are predators, but certain things I've seen have raised some flags to me. Rp can be really dangerous when people don't know who's behind the character, especially if things are sexual. Since then, both blogs have created 'About Me' sections which I think is good. So that's something I appreciate.

However, we've also had the opposite problem in which minors interact with us and our content. It's a huge problem that we are constantly trying to battle because while seeing/reading sexual content can be harmful for those who are underage, it's can also get us into a lot of trouble for interacting with minors even if we don't know they're underage. When the accusation that the rp accounts were minors came out, they were sent asks to confirm. One responded respectfully and one, in my opinion, responded not so respectfully. If you are ever asked if you are a minor, don't get pissed about it. It's an important question and you should understand and respect its importance. Just clarify.

I'm saying all this not because I don't think people should interact with these blogs if you want to. It's 100% up to you and I know a lot of people were having fun with it. You're all adults, do what you think is best. And I do think it would be really nice to have more guys in the community, whether they rp or not. My issue with them is more about safety than anything else.

Now back to the hate comments. For any issues I might have had with the Neteyam blog (again, no hate, just my own thoughts), I only ever saw the Lo'ak blog being respectful. Yet, I still saw someone on their actual blog, not under anon, telling him "can't you just leave?". Under no circumstances is it okay to say this to another person. Any one who is an active member of this community who posts fics or the like KNOWS what its like to receive hateful comments like this and you think its okay to say something like this to someone else? No way. I'm sure you know what it feels like to get comments like that and you decided to be nasty to another person anyway. You should know better. Anyone who can say something mean to or about another person should be ashamed of themselves.

For as much as I love this fandom, this is insane that I actually have to say this.

Be kind. Be respectful.

And if you can't?

It's called the block button, people. Use it.

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

An intro to my blog; Witchcraft, tarot, and general unhinged energy.

Bare-bones/TL;DR: My name is Frog or Froggo, whichever you prefer, I use he/him pronouns and this is a blog dedicated primarily to my practice as a witch. I do tarot readings over on Ko-FI, as well as some on here that are donation-based (You tip if you want, but you don't have to.) Donation-based readings are temporary to promote the paid readings, and I'll be closing requests once I feel I have a decent amount of people interested (or if i find that it isn't working and I'm just instead giving free readings and no paid readings.) Send in an ask for a donation-based reading, or head on over to my Ko-Fi if you want more of a guarantee that I'll get to your reading/want your reading prioritized. Please check the bottom of this post for what readings I do/don't do before sending an ask.

Me:

I go by Froggo or Frog

He/him pronouns

Trans, panromantic, polyamorous, and just generally queer.

auDHD

20

Quiet sunshine and rainbows type of guy, until you get to know me and then suddenly I won't shush and I keep talking about psychological horror

interests outside of witchcraft include writing, Genshin Impact (I promise I don't associate with the fandom they scare me so bad), music, anime, and "weird miscellaneous facts."

My craft:

I've been practicing off and on for about four years, but I've been around witchcraft my whole life. I no longer consider myself a beginner, but I wouldn't consider myself a beacon of knowledge either lol. I know enough to be comfortable practicing on my own, and giving others a few resources. If I ever post something with inaccurate information, something that appropriates any closed practices, or something that is otherwise not advisable, PLEASE let me know!

My interests in witchcraft include Tarot/oracle cards, deity work, crystals, and working with dragons. (Although, that last one is very new to me so I have very little experience to share so far.)

My work as a witch has begun to shape out as involving things that others fear and reject. I personally find this hilarious considering that I used to be so scared of everything.

I work with Persephone, Hades, Medusa, my familiar, Loki, Apollo, Aphrodite, and Khaos. They appeared to me in that order, with Aphrodite and Khaos being fairly recent additions as I'm typing this. (5/12/24) Note that this is a list of EVERYONE I work with at all, and some of them (like Medusa) only rarely show up in my life currently while others are more active.

I have a sideblog about my work with dragons, @officially-other, but it's so heavy on UPG, identity talk, feelings, etc. that I keep it separate from this blog. It's brand new as of editing but I plan on it being completely transparent.

Things to expect from me: An unreasonable amount of witchcraft memes, lots of fun little stories about my guides/deities and interactions with them, general stories about my craft. My asks are open, but I may not always have an answer to any questions! See the "not a beacon of knowledge" bullet point earlier.

DNI: Racists, misogynists, trans/homophobes, ableists, bigots of any kind, pɘdo, I feel like I'm forgetting something but overall just don't be an asshole okay??? Plz???? Thank you. 16+ minors are okay, below that you can follow and lurk just please don't start a proper conversation. (/lh, lighthearted)

TERMS FOR READINGS

Yes I know this is a bit long. I don't require that you read this but I don't answer asks with problems that could be solved by just reading this. I am no longer doing readings for anon asks, so please be off anon. Paid readings and any Tumblr readings that tip/donate beforehand will be prioritized, but other than that please be patient- when I post readings, I often get a lot of asks that takes weeks to get through.

Readings I will do:

General readings

Love readings (PLEASE check that it doesn't fall under "won't do" first)

Readings with a specific deity or entity (Paid readings get channeled typing,)

Pretty much anything that isn't on the "wont" list. (I reserve the right to say 'no' if something is brought up that I'm uncomfortable with but didn't think to put below.)

Readings I wont do:

Physical health readings (go see a professional)

Anything that constitutes "mind reading" (instead of "how does [person] truly feel" try "what's left being unsaid" or "what do I need to know" type questions.)

Sexual readings

Readings on a voice chat/call (yet)

Deity Identification readings (just not confident in them)

future spouse readings for free (I will do them paid, I just do the free readings to promote + for fun, and future spouse readings aren't fun for me)

[wylanslcve]

So if you've been following me on Instagram you would have seen me say recently that I've decided to take a step back from posting/sharing/creating Grishaverse content due to what Leigh Bardugo said (or rather what she didn't say) about the situation in Palestine. For context, during the press tour for The Familiar, an audience member asked Leigh about the justification for non-BIPOC authors profiting off BIPOC stories yet not advocating for real-life BIPOC people (since Leigh has been silent on Palestine since October, despite having expressed solidarity with Palestine in the past).

The video (which you can watch here) has been circulating the internet for a while, and I've already spoken about this on Instagram. I just forgot I had Tumblr for a second there, hence why I'm only addressing this now despite having already spoken about this. However, as someone who has an entire online presence dedicated to Leigh's work, it would be wrong and rather hypocritical of me to not address this.

Disclaimer: This is not a conversation about whether or not white/white-passing authors should be allowed to write BIPOC stories, as many people both in the comments of the original video and online generally have taken it. The issue isn't that Leigh is writing BIPOC stories - it's that she's writing them and choosing not to advocate for real BIPOC people.

The audience member asked a confronting but necessary question, and isn't harassing Leigh as many people online have interpreted it. Holding your favourite people accountable isn't "harassment", especially when that person is a successful author profiting off stories that reflect issues in the real world. Art is inherently political whether or not you want to acknowledge it. This also isn't about specifically asking Leigh this question because she's Jewish - it's because she profits off these stories and yet when these exact same issues are prevalent in the real world, suddenly they're "too political" for her to speak up about despite having expressed solidarity in the past. It has nothing to do with her being Jewish.

However, what's going on in Palestine isn't a political issue. It's basic human rights. It's about humanity, and acting as if posting about this issue is "performative" is ridiculous. I don't know what she's doing behind the scenes, so I'm not going to act as if she isn't doing anything outside of social media because I simply don't know, but when you have an online presence as big as Leigh's you should be using that platform to raise awareness and express solidarity. I understand that it's very easy to come across as "performing activism", especially on social media, but Palestinians have asked us time and time again to use our platforms to help raise awareness and amplify their voices. When you're someone like Leigh who profits off stories of the trials and tribulations of BIPOC people, the very least you can do is talk about the atrocities being committed against BIPOC people in real life.

No one is expecting you to be an expert on what's going on. If you've previously posted misinformation, why not learn from it and actually educate yourself and do better? You're literally an author who profits off stories of colonialism, oppression, dissemination, apartheid, segregation and genocide and suddenly that happening in real life is "too political"? And the amount of privilege you have to not want to get involved in talking about a real-life genocide because you "stopped being political on Instagram" is laughable. Just feeling sad about it isn't going to do anything. It doesn't erase the fact that an entire people are being ethnically cleansed in a genocide you refuse to talk about.

The Grishaverse means so much to me, it's gotten me through some extremely tough periods of my life, but I cannot in good conscience continue to support an author who chooses silence over her own humanity. All she had to say in response to that question was "free Palestine", but she instead said something akin to "I know about what's going on and I know silence and feeling sad about it probably isn't enough, but I'm just not going to do anything about it". Again, I know she's advocated for Palestine in the past, but why not continue doing so? No one is stopping her - she's actively chosen to stop.

As for my accounts? I'm still deciding what to do with them. I won't be deleting them, I'm not going anywhere, but I won't be posting edits or sharing analyses or general posts about the Grishaverse until Leigh decides to do better. This blog will probably turn into a multifandom blog, but who knows at this point. All I know is that I won't be promoting Leigh's work.