#I've been watching too much content on titans lately

[redeyeingirs]

A little more of Eren's dragon. I drew a few manga-style pages, but of course with dragons. Do you want to see them in color or not?

I also started drawing dragonizations for some queries. I draw according to my mood and inspiration, so it takes time.

Bonus:

[zeroclockk]

— ⋆˙⟡ Love Your Feeling (JJK) || Chapter four

- Handling It₊˚⊹♡

“I can handle myself Yoongi,” I look down. “How do you know? He doesn't turn into Dad. How do you know he won't lay an unwanted hand on you,"

Pair: jjk x femOC, college students, best friends

Word count: 7.3k

Warning: this chapter includes explicit scenes, mentions of abuse and past SA⚠️

masterlist || taglist

!Friends to Lovers, Protective Brother, Secret Dating, Friends with Benefits, Angst, Mature content, Dysfunctional Family, Fluff, Smut, Mentions of Alcoholism and Abuse

——————————————————————₊˚⊹♡

Time passes quickly at Jungkook’s place, or maybe just with Jungkook. It’s so effortless that sometimes I wish everything would go so smoothly.

It’s probably one of the only moments in my week that I feel properly comfortable. And it’s an awful shame that, that comfort has to come to an end. Before Yoongi goes all crazy mode again.

“Noooo I don’t wanna go,” I’m in this mood, where I just want to do nothing and where there’s just a small sadness settles within my chest, it makes me clingy. Only around the right people, if I were to be around Yoongi right now I’d probably be pissed off getting yelled at.

And how much I hate it, every good has to come to an end. And after The Titanic, some lazy monopoly game -that I won- so does this night.

By the time we spent 3 hours and 16 minutes watching The Titanic, I still hadn’t cheered up. So we moved to plan B, choosing a movie that’s not on the “classics” list. I picked one of my favourite animated movies, ‘I Want To Eat Your Pancreas’. Needless to say, it didn’t make it through the movie with dry cheeks.

And neither did Jungkook. I saw he was trying to act tough, but I caught him blinking a tear away.

He hadn’t watched it yet, it was a movie from my favourites list I’d been dying to watch with him. It always hits a soft spot.

“You gotta go, Bun,” It’s awful how he’s right. If I don’t go home now I’ll get in trouble, again. Going to the gym is more fun than going home, and I seriously hate the gym. "Uhg you want me gone so bad," I'm sprawled out on his carpet nearly dragging him down with me, as he tries to drag me inches closer to his front door, holding me by my wrists.

"Yes, leave," He drops my wrists back to the ground, really I could just stay on the ground here if it meant I didn't have to go home. though I have to give in before it gets too late. With a huge sigh, I get up to my feet grab his hoodie from the couch, and take it with me.

"Later Koo," I give him a high five, dragging one foot in front of the other as I get to the front door.

It is quiet out, there's a cold chill that settled inside Jungkook's stairwell. Pressing the down button on the elevator.

My earphones are completely tangled, I should probably save up for some AirPods. I've borrowed Jia's AirPods before and I basically fell in love with them ever since. With music now settling in my ears, I step inside the elevator.

It's awfully quiet out on the road. It's one of those nights where you feel like others can just feel the sadness radiating from you, even though you're not even sad. You just have this strong load of nothingness, sure it might have a little depressed hint to it, and sure I feel like if I missed my bus right now, I'd break down crying.

But luckily I don't, It's perfectly timed actually. right as I step out of Jungkook's building, my bus appears around the corner. Not paying attention to anyone that's around me, there's exactly one person who highlights the place. Just after I checked in and turned to the bus aisle to get seated, Taehyung is sat there, right at the end of the bus.

I debate for a second if I should sit next to him or not, but the moment he makes eye contact with me it just feels weird not to. I shoot him a small tight-lipped smile whilst making my way over to the seat next to him.

"Hey," I tell him as he waves a little at me, giving me one of his gorgeous smiles. "What are you doing here? I've never seen you take this bus before," I try to sound the most genuine not to be rude, I mean I am genuine. I've seriously never seen him on this bus before, and I take this bus a lot. It's the only bus that goes from the city to the suburbs, Or the only one that goes from Jungkook's apartment To mine.

"Oh well, you know... There's this awesome girl that just has been ignoring me for two days now, I was going to check up on her," He tells me, and then I'm sat there thinking I had a chance with him. But then he gives me this look, eyebrows raised, eyes slightly in a pouty look. is he talking about me? I mean, I haven't used my phone since my fight with Yoongi, so that includes not responding to him.

I point at myself with raised eyebrows, nonverbally asking if he was going to my place. Which he responds to with a small smile followed by a nod of his head, confirming my assumptions.

"Ah well, my phone got partially smashed and, I swear it’s getting worse by the hour... I haven't charged it since, sorry," I apologize. "How'd you even find out where I live anyway?" None of my friends have ever been to my home, Jungkook's first time was today. Taehyung doesn't know Yoongi so it couldn't have been him either... But my thoughts are cut off by his response "Oh! my brother's dating Ashley,"

of course, I know Ashley, she's been to my house plenty of times... I think. I don't know, She's a really good friend of Yoongi's. They've known each other for as long as I've existed. Even after all the years they've been friends, I haven't really gotten to know her. She comes by sometimes, so I only see a glimpse of her. The past couple of years have been pretty quiet, though I see her texts sometimes and I see her Instagram stories.

Though whenever I have women's problems, where Yoongi doesn’t know what to do. Hell call her up and ask her for advice, or to come by and handle the situation.

This one time I thought I was having my first period and I just needed pads, he called Ashley to get some and explain to me how they work.

Then this other time my boobs first started coming through and I needed to go bra shopping. Yoongi and I made it to the store but the second he saw a bra, he magically turned into Ashley. Yoongi was nowhere to be found unit later that evening, with a cake to celebrate the birth of my boobs. Yeah, I wish I was lying.

There settles an awkward silence between me and Taehyung, it's late in the evening so we're the only two on the bus besides the driver. the drive doesn't take long, it's about 12 minutes from point A to B.

It's by the time we hit the start of the suburbs that a thought pops into my head. All scenarios flash through my brain if I had stayed home today. Taehyung probably would've stumbled upon Yoongi, I don't want to know how things would've ended then. I know it would be bad but...

I shouldn’t be worrying about this, I don’t forbid him from seeing girls. Ignored their existence even, not that there ever were many girls at the apartment. I’m too scared to even let people in, too bothered by a stupid reputation nobody cares about.

I don’t care if he’s banged some girl he doesn’t know, I don’t care if he’s going to propose to someone next week. Okay well, that’s a stretch. The point is, it doesn’t matter to me what he’s doing with who and where, neither should he.

Now it's only two stops away from my destination and I'm freaking out. "Uhm Taehyung, I really don't mean to be rude but.. you have to get off," which obviously leaves him confused, I’d be too if this random person from school told me to ‘get off’ for no valid given reason.

"What? Why? It's late I thought I'd walk you home," Gosh, bless him and his sweet heart.

"Although I'd seriously love for you to walk me home, Yoongi is going to kill the both of us if he sees us together, so please do me a favour and get off. I promise I'll make it up to you," I plead. He must see how panicked I look, cause his expression softens and he gives in whilst I apologize to him profusely.

He waves it off as an 'I'ts fine' and then goes to stand outside, watching the bus pass by leaving him behind.

I shoot him one last apologetic smile, gosh I feel guilty. The first thing I’ll do when I get home is text him because this is just a shitty thing to do without a proper explanation. He doesn't know Yoongi, he doesn't know how the situation sits, I hope he'll be understanding.

With a big sigh, I try to relieve the stress off of my shoulders, I spot someone in the corner of my eye that looks all too familiar. Walking on the sidewalk past the next bus stop that the bus reaches. I'm so glad I pushed Taehyung off of the bus cause, speaking of the devil, Yoongi is walking home. I quickly press the stop button and run off the bus trying my best to catch up to Yoongi.

"Heyy Yoongelss!," I sound totally fine, not suspicious at all. I probably sound mostly out of breath, from the run over here.

I can see him raise on eyebrow squinting his eyes a little at me. "where have you been!!," I try my best to show my interest in him, getting all spotlights to go his way.

"Uhm, I just got back from Seokjin and Namjoon’s place," he explains. Seokjin and Namjoon are his friends from college. Aside from Ashley, I was confused to see he actually has friends.

Ashley was our childhood neighbour, she's always just been here. Not a moment has she ever bothered me. But his other friends? They're dicks. I've only met them very few times, They always make fun of my being Yoongi's little sister, with emphasis on little. It’s unfair really! I’m not even that tiny, they’re just freakishly tall. I'm sure they're nice once you get to know them.

"You hungry?" With all the fights between us these past few days, I feel like we need some quality time. "Sure let's go," He takes the turn towards our street, which has a convenience store on the corner.

Both getting ourselves some noodles and a drink, coincidentally both having the exact same order as we meet at the tables. Yoongi sitting opposite me, he's quiet.. he isn't much of a talker anyway, we both enjoy our quiet times. but I came here to talk so...

"Yoongi, I'm sorry if I disappointed you..," Deep down I know I didn't do anything wrong, he's the one who got mad in the first place. All I ever do is care, mentally and physically. I care so much for him, all I ever do is for his convenience.

"No, I should apologize," Is he, serious? I don't think I've ever heard him apologize before, even if he should've, he finds it difficult to admit his faults. "I shouldn't have been so harsh on you.." he starts. "It's just.." He sighs deeply, he is having a hard time saying whatever he's about to. It must've been bothering him a lot.

"Nayun.. Before you were born, Dad was living at home like.. consistently. And he wasn’t as bad as a father as what you know him as. When you think of Dad you just think of this abusive asshole who left us and probably some really traumatic things. When I think of Dad… I see my Dad, the guy who used to play basketball with me, take me to school, and read me stories to bed until mom got pregnant with a girl... and when I see you with guys, all I can see is what dad turned into and how these guys could too,"

Wow, he's never opened up this much. I never knew Dad wasn’t like that before I was born, I guess it explains a lot. But still, this doesn’t justify the way he’s been acting, for like ever.

I don’t really know what I should do with this information, I don’t know if I’m better off knowing it or not. All these years Dad was just like that because he was Dad, and now I feel responsible for it. I’m not the only one who suffered from his abuse, Yoongi did too. If I wasn’t born, maybe Yoongi would’ve had a proper dad.

But then also, why did Dad didn’t like me? Why does he resent me? He couldn’t just pretend I was a guy, yes sure it would’ve fucked me up in different ways, but I think I prefer that over the things he’s done instead.

Instead, I wound up with an evil baggage of daddy issues, the version that includes the sexualized version.

“I can handle myself Yoongi,” I look down at my noodles, chopsticks ready to grab some. Instead, I bite down on my lip and pick at the separate strings of noodles, suddenly my appetite has completely gone out the window.

I was ready to sit down with Yoongi and have a heartfelt conversation, make up even. It’s every time that Dad gets mentioned, it runs my mood entirely. I hate that man from the bottom of my heart. I hate him so much, each time he leaves I hope he’ll never come back. It even gets so fucked up that sometimes I dream of police coming by the house, telling us the ‘bad news’ of him being in an accident. And I hate that I still care so much, I still love him deep down.

“How do you know?.. huh? How do you know that this guy that you’ve been seeing that's just oh-so-perfect. Doesn’t just turn his back on you and turns into Dad,” His voice raises.

“How do you know that one day you won’t end up with a guy that hits you every day uses you for his needs, and doesn’t give a fuck about your feelings on it,”

“How do you know he won’t just go at it without checking up on you asking you for a fucking green light knows when to keep his hands at home,”

It’s a chapter I put past me a while ago. It wasn’t even a heavily reoccurring event anyway, I’ve moved on that’s the point. Yoongi and I both went through tough stuff with him, I know he wants to protect me. But all I really need from him is love and support. To get through everything together, but I’m afraid that’ll never go through to him.

“You know how much it hurts me? Looking at you? All I can think of are the sounds from your room and I couldn't do anything, you didn't do anything,” He sounds angry in a way, it’s not said softly or calm, he doesn’t take his time saying what he said no it’s rushed. His words poke right through me, it hurts. How does he think he can just say that, he's being so unreasonable.

And there goes my entire appetite, in with the tears. Great... I don’t like crying like this in front of Yoongi. It’s okay when he’s yelling at me, or smashing things around me, being in a fit of rage. Not when he’s being honest, emotional, and nonviolent. I can’t say his voice gets the memo too.

Yoongi hadn’t bothered keeping his voice on a socially acceptable level, I could see the cashier looking at me with a funny expression that told me he was assuming way too many things from this conversation alone.

What makes it worse is that he doesn’t know how to act, he just sits there staring at his noodles looking all stupid. I don’t want to cry but the tears just keep coming, I don’t make a single sound. I must look stupid along with him, swallowing my tears back as much as possible. But it’s hard, there are far too many to swallow back, frantically wiping away my tears with the sleeve of Jungkook’s hoodie.

I want to get out of here, I just feel out of place. But I just can’t go running to Jungkook every time something bad happens. He shouldn’t be the one who cheers me up and he shouldn’t be the one who has to sit with my feelings.

But he’s also always been there for me, still after everything he tells me he’ll be there for me whenever. So you can call me selfish for this but, I’m going to take his word for it and go over to his place. It’s either that or go home and after this conversation that’s the last thing I want to do.

“I’m sorry,” I sniff back my tears, stabilizing my voice as much as I can. “You can have mine,” I push my bowl of ramen towards him, getting up from my seat and practically barging out of the convenience store.

He looks dumbfounded as I pass by the window he’s sitting at, and he just continues eating his stupid noodles. I try my best not to cry during the bus ride but it somehow just feels so much longer than usual.

After what feels like an eternity, I just stand there, in front of his apartment complex. Trying to muster up the courage to knock on his door.

I’ve calmed down a little, I’m not crying anymore. Though my mind seems to be racing at 100 miles an hour, I’m never this hesitant to go up to Jungkook’s apartment. So whenever I do, it’s a cry for help -to myself that is-. It makes me nervous, cause I feel like a bother to him. He’s made me sure I’m not, so I set it aside the best I can and knock.

There’s a long moment of silence after I knock on his door, is he home? My phone is dead so I won’t be able to text or call him and I don’t have a spare key either so.. oh my god what if he’s in there with someone? Maybe he’s just asleep I mean it is pretty late.

Suddenly everything I’ve set aside comes rushing back to me almost twice as hard as it did before. I panic, I shake my head at the thought of me standing here as if I’m not literally in that situation right now. I really need to get out of here.

In a fit of confusion and regret, I barge back to the elevator, pressing its button which definitely takes longer than usual to work.

But then finally the doors open, ready to step inside eyes glued to the ground.

“Nayun?,” It's a male voice, familiar even, but it's not Jungkook’s or Yoongi’s. And Yoongi is quick off the list cause, he wouldn’t be confused about me being here and I would’ve just known if it were him. I quickly look up from the ground to identify whoever’s speaking to me.

Suddenly my panicked thoughts, have turned into a panic attack. I take a step back, breathing getting more difficult than usual. It’s as if talking about him, has summoned the devil. I can’t think straight anymore, the world suddenly spinning around me. Everything had been feeling like an eternity, but this moment right here is something I’ve never in my life witnessed before.

Not a moment where he walked inside of the living room that had me this shocked, not a moment where there was cash left on the table with a note to another disappointment that he was gone for a weekend that left me this devastated.

What is he even doing here? He has no use in a neighbourhood like this, it’s not the way he works like he’d always tell me. That even though we live in a dump, always shitting at how disgusting we live and never taking action to make the situation better.

“D-Dad? What are you doing here?..” I stutter, barely being able to form proper sentences. My mind is blank for a second, time pauses and all I can think about is him, quickly followed by how disgusting he is and how he still walks around freely and everything just crashes down on me. There’s so much happening at once, I just feel helpless at this point.

He’s about to take another step forward until he’s cut off, making him step back staying put in the elevator.

“Yun, I found it. You don’t have to buy new ones let’s go” a voice says from my left. I look at where the voice is coming from, registering his features. It’s Taehyung again jumping out from behind the corner, right beside the elevator. He doesn’t see my father, nor does he see Taehyung.

There are so many questions going on inside of my mind, but I don’t have any time to act on them. Telling Taehyung it’s ‘great’ even though there’s nothing about today that is ‘great’ before I walk with him not thinking twice about whether I should tell my Dad goodbye or not. Or even hear him out.

I follow Taehyung up one more floor, into his apartment. Quite literally shaking from what just happened, and he tried to take care of me so well. He sits me down on his couch, takes my shoes off, and gets me a glass of water. Tells me to breathe in and out, tells me everything is going to be okay.

Something in me tells me he has done this before.

I could ask him one hundred questions right now, give him a thousand explanations, or freak out and run. But the first thing that comes out of my mouth is; “How did you know..?”

“I didn’t,”

“Let me explain,” he gestures for me to sit down on his couch.

He explained to me how he was walking up the stairwell and saw me walking through the hall, great time to have glass doors. He was going to call out for me until he heard me and my dad. Assuming the panic in my voice wasn’t something positive and felt like I just needed to get out of there.

“I hope it wasn’t the wrong move to make,” he asks looking somewhat apologetic, just in case.

“No, no you were great. I think with the bus and everything I owe you an explanation as well” I saw looking down at my hands fiddling with the hem of my sleeve.

I try to give him a light explanation, which is difficult since the story has so much to it. Sparing him the details of my childhood by just telling him he’s a very bad Dad, that I hadn’t seen for an entire year. That Jungkook lives downstairs and that, that’s why I was there in the first place.

“Oh and about the bus... You know Yoongi? Ashley’s friend?” I ask him, to which he nods in agreeance.

“Yeah well, that's the brother I was talking about, and.. we just had a big fight about how he doesn’t let me date and such,”

I can hear him sucking in his breath through his teeth at the mention of Yoongi being my brother, I guess his name has come across some time.

“I swear he can be really nice…” he chuckles at that, hand scratching the nape of his neck.

He walks over to his fridge holding up a Coke, looking at me with a questioning look to see if I want one as well, then hands it to me.

“So you live here?” I ask him.

“Ah no, my sister just moved here recently,” That makes sense, I’ve never seen him here before and I’ve been in the building plenty of times.

“She’s out for the weekend, I promised to watch her cat,”

My face immediately switches into a pouty face with big, big puppy eyes. “You have a cat? I love cats!”

He nods excitedly before he starts calling out pet names, making squeaky noises with his mouth to lure the cat to him.

He disappears into the hall for a second before his head peaks through the open doorway “Found her!” I immediately stand up walking towards him, into a bedroom.

I don’t see a cat at first, but upon better inspection, there’s a little tiny bump under the perfectly made-up duvet. I fold over the covers to reveal the cutest little cat I’ve ever seen. Okay well not the cutest, coco will always be no.1.

It’s a really small fluffy cat, she must still be a kitten. “What’s her name?” I ask between my awh’s and baby talks to the cat. I look over my shoulder to see him leaning against the doorframe.

“Bada, because of her eyes” I look back at the cat, she has have most crystal blue eyes, or, I guess ocean blue.

I lie down on the bed petting the cat's head before she rolls around exposing her belly, and stretching her little arms and legs out. I think I might melt from cuteness overload

“Aren’t you the cutest little thing,” I must sound so stupid, but it’s a cat! I can’t help it.

“Not to me she isn’t,” Taehyung says from behind me. “I’m taking you’re not a big cat person?”

Couldn’t be me. don’t get me wrong I like dogs, but you actually need to walk them and stuff. I like affectionate cats that are a little lazy, you can just cuddle with them and their playtime can be done from the couch.

“I actually own a dog, his name is Yeontan he’s like really cute and fluffy,” he tells me walking over to the edge of the bed with his phone out and showing me a picture of his dog.

I got to give it to him, he is cute.. most small dogs look like little rats but if they’re fluffy they’re a lot cuter.

“Okay, I guess he’s cute but.. over a cat?” I pick up Bada and hold her up next to my face, her arm right under my chin as I look at Taehyung with a pouty face.

Talking like a little kid “How could you have me?.. I don’t bite you’re just biased,” which makes him chuckle. He looks gorgeous, his laugh is so adorable and cute it instantly makes me smile along with him. Just looking at each other for a few seconds, smiling like two idiots.

“Uhm do you have a charger perhaps? I should probably bring my phone back from the dead,” I ask breaking our little stare-down. Which leads us back to the living room.

He searches for a charger because it’s not his house, it gives me a moment to inspect the room a little bit. I see a picture of Taehyung and what I assume must be his sister, stood on the TV stand.

She’s really pretty, she looks like Taehyung. Their family must be blessed with good genes. His sister has light brown hair and a bright smile so big her eyes are closed shut, a peace sign next to her cheek as Taehyung stands next to her poking out next to her, holding two fingers behind her head to imitate bunny ears.

Next to it is a smaller picture frame that holds a picture of what I’m guessing is Taehyung his sister and his little brother as kids, I can’t help but smile at it as I pick it up.

“Oh gosh that is so embarrassing, put that down,” he laughs seeing what I’m holding when he walks up to me, handing me a charger.

“Noo! You look cute,” I smile looking up at him over my shoulder, I feel like I’m about to faint as he looks back at me. He’s close, so close.

His hair falls over his forehead, lightly touching his right eyebrow. not a pimple or a pore to be seen, but the slightest little stubble peeks through on the bottom of his chin. his deep brown eyes have a subtle glint in them, I swear it's shaped like a four-pointed star.

My eyes falter down to his lips and I can see him inching closer, ever so slowly. Until I break it, clearing my throat and taking the charger from his hand. I mean I’d kill to kiss those gorgeous lips, but not today. I’ve been on such an emotional rollercoaster it just feels wrong to let those take over pleasure.

"Where's the outlet?" he takes a step back clearing his throat as well, his eyes scanning the room. "Yeah there," purposely not looking at each other. I walk in the direction he pointed at plugging in my phone, before sitting down on the couch.

And now it's back to awkward silence again. I slide my hands across my thighs and knees, lips forming in a tight line. He doesn't say anything either, sitting down on the couch next to me leaving more than enough space between us.

"You wanna watch a movie? Or should I get you home?" He asks me, so so polite, but going home? yeah hell no, that's not happening today. I think I'm going to text Jungkook when my phone charges to see if he's home and then sleep over at his place.

so movie time it is, it's great to spend some quality time with Taehyung. "Yeah no a movie sounds good" I patiently watch him as he turns the TV on navigating to Netflix.

"Fall?" he suggests. "hmn no," he continues scrolling. "Oh! Perks of Being a Wallflower?" I suggest. but he declines and says he didn't like it that much. "Me before you?" he looks at me, at this pace it'll be a continuous loop of this and that. but I've seen it already, and to be honest I don't want to watch it again.

"OH! She's the man! I love that movie!" I see the hesitant look on his face, but something in him makes him go with it.

I tuck my knees up on the couch, inching a tiny bit closer to Taehyung. I don't know what happened but by the end of the movie I was cuddled up into his arms, I heard him laugh during the movie. he turned the TV off, taking his arm off of me.

"Did you like it?" I look at him hopefully, awaiting his approval of the movie. if he doesn't like it I don't know what I'll do. "It was.. good! I liked it," he smiles. this is one of the movies in my top 10 list, god top 5 even! And he thinks it's good? he liked it? This is a great movie, an awesome movie.

I stare at him in awe, unbelievable that he just said that. I shake my head in disagreement, though he picks it up the right way laughing along with me.

"Thank you for having me over," I thanked him, it was late already when I got here. after a whole movie, I really should get going.

I thank him once more unplugging my phone from the charger seeing it's nearly 2.30 in the morning. He walks me out, my eyes linger across his features once more as I stand outside of the door. It takes everything in me not to kiss him right on the spot. "I'll text you," I smile widely at him.

I don't text Jungkook I'm only one floor above him, and I'll pass his door anyway. I make my way downstairs knocking on his door for the second time this night. He's probably still awake, playing overwatch or something.

And the door opens this time. But I don't see Jungkook, no. Mingyu opens the door ever so cheerfully, welcoming me in without a doubt. "Hey, Mingyu! Jungkook home?"

"Sorry Yun, I don't think he’ll be home tonight but you're free to take his room," that’s embarrassing. Mingyu knows absolutely nothing about me, and yet he just knows I need a place to sleep. "Thanks. I’ll... text him,"

His room is neat, bed made perfectly. I hold my phone up to my ear. Ringing, once, twice, trice, like four hundred more times I don't know. it feels like an eternity until it goes to voicemail, which leaves me with a text.

no matter how close Jungkook and I are, it's still weird to sleep in his bed without him knowing.

Hey Koo, I'm staying over at yours just so you know.

What a rough night, I went from crying at home to being emotionally rescued by Jungkook. Then going home meeting Taehyung on the bus, just to rudely push him off of it. Meeting up with Yoongi five seconds later, fighting once again, getting back to Jungkook’s apartment where I found my Dad after a whole year to once again be rescued by Taehyung this time. Followed up by Mingyu letting me into Jungkook's apartment and now we're here.

I don’t think it's a crime to say that I'm tired, and I just want to sleep the night away. I'm actually doing fairly well for the rollercoaster I've been on, Taehyung really helped me out tonight.

I scavage around Jungkook’s dresser to find a black shirt, placing it on the bed. taking my makeup off in the bathroom, Jungkook was right this morning. I really do look terrible. Gosh, I went to Taehyung's like this? I hope he didn't wear his contacts.

Back in Jungkook’s room, in his shirt that's far too big on me. I settle down in his bed, off to fucking, unicorns, and elves or something. I'm going to dream so, so well, Jungkook's bed is like a cloud in physical form. And before I know it I'm off to dreamland.

at least that's what I think, I sent Jungkook that message 15 minutes ago tops. And he walks in, doesn't even say anything but cuts right to the chase and kisses me with force, hungrily whilst cupping my cheeks.

"I haven't stopped thinking about you all day Yun, you drive me insane," he says between kisses, trailing down my jaw and my neck as I give him more space to mark me even more than he already has.

he moves onto the bed, pushing me further back against his pillows. his lips work me so good I think I’ll get addicted to it soon.

He takes off his shirt, pulling at the hem of mine placing small kisses all over my face. His hands are all over me, massaging my thighs, trailing up over my hips to hold my waist whilst the other one is holding himself up as he hovers over me.

He just knows what to do, gets me so wet so easily. Skip the foreplay, fuck me right now. mainly because this foreplay feels like it's taking forever, I just want him out of his jeans right now.

I move my face away from him, pulling the shirt off that I'd been wearing. The sight of my bare chest is all it takes for him to start unbuckling his belt, his abs on full display, oh lord I love this sight. wish I could marry this sight.

His hair falls in front of his face trickling his nose, gosh he looks so goddamn handsome.

My eyes shoot open and I'm met by the sight of Jungkook's PC setup. What the fuck, did I seriously just have a sex dream about Jungkook?? my best friend? My head shoots to the door as Jungkook walks in, the real one. He peeks his head through to see if I'm asleep or not.

"Jungkook?.." I nearly whisper. He takes this as his queue to come in, dimly turning on the lights. rushing over to my side of the bed, crouching down next to me as I swing my legs over the edge. knees facing his chest, taking my hands in his.

"Are you okay? what happened?" He looks panicked, I feel guilty. he must think something major is going on because I'm staying over. well maybe because I came by at 2.30 in the morning, or a combination of the two.

"Where did you come from? You’re out of breath," Though I feel guilty I can’t help but suck in a deep breath, this stupid dream is making me delusional into thinking I’m attracted to him.

"Yun, You're here at 2 in the morning what's going on"

"I'm fine really," I assure him. I don't know if I want to break down in his arms or pretend like everything is fine. I don’t want to burden him each time with my issues, we barely ever talk about him and his situation.

but he insists no matter how much I hold on to the 'I'm fine act' he doesn't let it pass until I spill everything out.

"Okay.." I sigh letting my shoulders drop, here it goes.

"So... I left your apartment and when I got on the bus, Taehyung was sitting there. I push him off of the bus and at the next stop I meet Yoongi, we go out to eat. he tells me he hell basically never let me date and that I'm the big cause of turning Dad into what I turned into. well, he didn't tell me that exactly but that's what it felt like okay. Anyways, I ran off and came back to your apartment but nobody opens so I went to the elevator where I saw my Dad, I nearly got a panic attack but then Taehyung was there yelling out something about a store and I needed to come back so we go to his apartment upstairs, sorry I mean his sister's apartment that has a really really cute cat by the way a-"

"Yun, Yun," he waves his hands around a little cutting me off. "Your Dad was here? in my building?" he asks, his brows furrowing a little as his expression turns into a combination of complete shock and something that makes me think he isn't processing this properly.

"Yeah, But it's fine! Taehyung and I watched a movie and I actually feel way better right now," that's not a lie, I do feel better. I was shocked at first and yeah I might've had a slight panic attack, but now it just feels numb. I see he's doubting me, eyebrows raised with a questioning look on his face. "Seriously" I assure.

"Alright," he stands up his hands ghosting mine before he walks over to his dresser grabbing the pyjamas that are folded on top of it heading back to his door. "Let me know if you need anything m’kay?"

I nod with a small smile, more like the corner of my lip inching up for a split second. He walks back out, turning the lights off before he shuts the door.

It falls silent. I grab my phone off of the nightstand to check the time. 3.40 am. I should really be going back to sleep. I lay back down on my back, staring at the ceiling waiting to fall asleep again. I close my eyes but all I see are flashbacks of the stupid, stupid dream I had. I shouldn't think about it, nope.

Lasagna, yes I'll make lasagna tomorrow *Jungkook’s abs* no no no. Okay uhm, Karaoke. I should practice my singing. Yeah! That IU song has been going well, I should learn the second verse. Or maybe something with a higher range, I mean certainly the f#5 was harsh on me first but I think I've got it. Maybe I could up it a notch by going for like a G5. I know Sia's chandelier is also *Jungkook* no no no. No!

Maybe something sad? Today was sad! shit, what if Yoongi texted me? I flip my phone over to look at it. 3.50, that took me ten whole minutes to think about? Woah.

I unlock my phone and I see exactly one message. From the group chat, something about Kai and his slutty waist or something, I don't know. But nothing from Yoongi, glad to know my brother cares so much. Who am I kidding I should be glad to be free from him for a second.

He worries about the wrong things, worries about things that aren’t there. Talking to guys is forbidden but walking off in the middle of the night where anything could happen, that’s okay with him? I could’ve been kidnapped countless amounts of times, I guess he’s used to me running off.

Wait, what if Dad went home after he saw me? what if he's there right now? I don’t know what a disaster it could be back at home. I don’t know if when I go home tomorrow I'll stumble upon a murder scene or a trashed house, or a bleeding out Yoongi with a drunk mom and dad in the room or-

I sigh deeply, this is too stressful for me to think about at the moment. Hey well, at least I'm not thinking about Jungkook's big, big strong veiny hands anymore. oh, what is wrong with me?

That's why I decided to get out of his bed and go over to the living room. He's sitting on the couch, TV on. I can see there's a soju bottle on the coffee table unable to tell if it is full, empty, or partially drank.

The back of the couch is facing the bedroom doors, he can't tell I’m here.

"Koo?" I sound quiet but it's still enough to make him turn around and look at me. "I can't sleep" I haven't properly tried but my mind is racing from thought to thought and when I do actually sleep all that I can seemingly think about is Jungkook and his crazy good abs.

he nudges his head for me to come towards him. he adjusts his position to lie down completely on his back, with his neck looking for support on the armrest whilst holding out an arm for me to join him. so I do, lying down on his chest and closing my eyes as I lay down.

His attention stays stuck on the TV, now with a lowered volume. My back is facing the screen anyway, the only thing I pay attention to is the rising and falling of Jungkook’s chest and his heartbeat beating in an exact pattern. That is until I hug his waist and let out a big sigh of relief. It goes from a steady pattern to a moment of nothingness until it switches back to its original pattern.

“Thanks for letting me stay,”

“Anytime,” His hand falls on top of my arm that’s hugging him, the pads of his fingers lightly tracing figures on it.

“Hope I didn’t intrude on your plans,” I look up at him.

“Never,” he smiles.

“I was watching football with Eunwoo, Guesung and Minghao. Mingyu was supposed to be there but he had to pick his girlfriend up from the airport,” he explains.

I hum at that readjusting my head back to its original position, on his chest. “Sorry for giving you a heart attack,”

“Yun,” He moves his hand under my chin lifting it up to look at him. “Promise me that next time you fight with Yoongi, or see your Dad -no matter if something happens or not- You’ll call me,”

“Sure? Yoongi loves arguing,”

“You know what I mean,” he says, taking his hand away from my face. “Promise me,”

“Okay…”

“Say it” He insists, making me smile.

“I promise” Now I can sleep, in peace.

prev | next

[vinxwatches]

justice league dark apokolips war

major spoilers

i've been watching a lot of DC shit lately. lost of john constantine. and man does this thing have a great opening for me. seemingly a focus on john and raven? hell yea, really missed raven content after watching teen titans years back.

damn, gory. i mean right up my interest (yes i'm twisted). someone escaping missing a leg, losing 1 arm? yea, for some daft reason that interests me too much. what are the results? how does it feel? how does one react and recover?

oh, batman supposedly is evil now. oh, and disarmed wonderwoman (i think) still functions. or it's lois, that might make more sense.

raven don't give no fucks, my favourite. something tells me we'll see apocalypse/darkside fight trigon in this.

oh, very dead starfire. and a fucked up but alive nightning. oh, always fun to see more Harley quin. oh, his ex was not harley, it was shark king... neat. always more queer then i expect.

drain the planets core. yea that would kill the planet, but why? there are far easier ways to do something like that.

mmm, some where not as dead as i thought, but i don't think there's a lot of them left.

"oh, you hurt me, now we're having fun". such a fun trope.

the flashes fate is both tragic and fucking hilarious.

"techno magic. feels like taking a test you haven't studied for. luckily i cheat" and this is why i love john.

you might have a deal with john, but he has a trick up his sleave. because he always has a trick. and like most of his tricks, they work... mostly... ish. though i wonder if the mostly is for real. seems a bit shark jumpy.

yea, called it twice. also the post death scene is most fitting. of course batman had a plan B that works.

why does raven get eagle sounds? because corvids don't sound nice enough? they sound fucking epic.

no one else would be this angry at being alive.

called the same thing... again?

those are some good lasts words.

not a fan of this ending. sure, i may not like a not great ending, but make it matter. this way you just undo all the progress. nothing they achieved actually mattered. don't retcon the ending at the ending of your movie.

[cellsshapedlikestars]

I normally come here for the Jonsa content but you have me wanting to bing Inuyasha now lol. It's been years. First Ballad of Fallen Angels (imo visually one of the best anime episodes ever) and now Inuyasha. Do you have a fav anime?/ which are your fav animes? Whichever question fits best.

Well, considering my icon is from Sailor Moon (though likely unrecognizable, it's Lethe and Mnemosyne from the manga) and my ao3 name is a reference to Cowboy Bebop, those are probably some answers to that question!

I won't say that Cowboy Bebop is my favorite, though. I loved it a lot and obviously it had an impact on me since 2 of my online handles have been references to it. I also loved it's sister show Samurai Champloo.

Sailor Moon was the first anime I got into. I even ran a Sailor Mars fan page back when I was a baby child messing around on geocities (was it geocities? I don't remember. I also wrote fanfic that I never posted lol). Sailor Moon remains something I am intensely nostalgic about. I even put the newest manga editions on my Christmas list (because I don't own them anymore because I went through a phase where I was "too cool" for everything and got rid of all my anime/manga and a lot of my old fantasy books and I regret it so hard because I spent so much time and carefully saved allowances to buy each and every one. Ugh.) I reblog Sailor Moon the most because the aesthetic is everything to me. I love 90s anime aesthetics.

I think, though, in my heart of hearts, it's Inuyasha that's my favorite. I was so obsessed with it. I would tape every episode when it aired on Adult Swim (I wasn't allowed to stay up that late) and then I'd watch it the next day when I got home. Inuyasha is what truly introduced me to fanfic. I learned to play some of the music on the piano. I spent hours designing Inuyasha bookmarks to print and computer wallpapers and screensavers... I didn't write fic for it though, weirdly.

Anyway, I'm rambling. There's so much that I watched as a kid and I could go on and on even more, but I won't. Alas, I stopped watching anime in high school and the only ones I've watched since have been FMA: Brotherhood (loved it) and I watched about two seasons of Attack on Titan but then I had to wait for new ones and just never went back.

[gilded-ghosts]

3, 14, 18!!!

omg, desgoffes! how are you? ♡

3. Where do you get inspiration?

I wish I had a more poignant answer.......but I read too many books, watch too much television/too many films, and obsess over too much/many music & lyrics. Escapism at its finest. In each of these, however, there are perfectly remarkable and unremarkable stories and narratives that haunt my very bones.

14. what era of simblr do/did you love the most and what do you miss the most?

When I first joined simblr...I think back in like 2017? I had no idea what I was doing, and my edits/builds were terrible...but I was literally here to just tell a story and everyone was just SUPER friendly. I also miss all the members of PTS (OG titans, y'all) who no longer are active in this community.

18. Are you currently working on anything?

Um, all the things! I guess I'm *trying* to be good and actually work on Palmer Legacy and Pride & Plasma posts...but I've lost faith in my ability to write. JK.

In all seriousness, I've been a CC-making machine lately, so I guess expect a lot of new custom content from me in Nov.? I've been learning how to make build/buy objects! It's been a hoot!

[musicallisto]

Hello love,

Congratulations for the 800 followers! You absolutely deserve this and so much more! I'm happy to see how your blog grows and that you're still providing all of us with wonderful content. You're one of the first blogs that I've started to follow here on Tumblr and I'm so lucky to have found your blog ♡

As for your celebration event, could I please request a 🍨 vanilla milkshake with a male Peaky Blinders Character?

I'm more on the curvy side (and insecure about it) and I'm ALWAYS wearing black (which I love, no matter what others say or even more if they object). As for my personality, I'm a highly complex, paradox and complicated individium. I'm unbelievable patient, timid, awkward, kind, forgiving, open-minded, compassionate, thruthful, gentle and calm and I've been told that I have a calming effect on others, that I can easily ground anyone and anything, no matter how troubled their mind is. I prefer vintage over modern things. I think rather deep which often leads me to overthinking everything, which in turn leads me to doubting (very much) myself. You would be surprised how timid and reserved I am, I'm sure you wouln't notice me in a room full of people if it wouldn't be for my different appearance (but I like it this way). I'm always well-meaning, yet often misunderstood (maybe because it's hard for me to articulate myself). I can be incredible lazy, clumsy and forgetful. I've always felt like I don't really belong anywhere, so I've started to distance myself from others a while ago. I'm a outsider, weird, a dork, not normal, a loner and I fucking love it, because I like to be different, I would hate to fit into just one box and to be like everyone else. And I like people who are not ashamed to be their 100% true self, no matter how different that is from the mainstream. I'm the most loyal person you'll ever find, once you earn my trust, I'll always be on/by your side, no matter what. That says a lot, because I'm hard to scare away. Sometimes I feel alienated from the people and things surrounding me and I'm sure that I annoy and bore them. I'm very nervous and insecure around others, which is why I try to avoid people and why I'm not talking all that much around them (though, I'm a really good listener). I'm easily overwhelmed by large crowds and much light/noise, that's why I don't like to go outside, I prefer to cozy up at home. I would never intentionally hurt a animal and I'm not eating any meat, which is very important to me. I believe that there isn't a ounce of cruelty inside me. I'm unassuming and understanding, I only believe what I've witnessed on my own and I have endless acceptance for almost everything. Due to my Insomnia, I'm a night owl. I have strong personal values, am very opinionated and I'm really in-touch with myself and even though I'm extremly insecure, I would never reduce or change myself and views/opinions for someone and I neither have a problem to challenge authority and advocating for my beliefs. I'm a perfectionist and sometimes I really hate it. And, as you can see, I'm unable to be brief. My favourite colours are dark green, black, gold and dark purple. My greatest passion is music, even if I can't sing or play an instrument.(I prefer rock/punk/pop/80s/90s) It's the most calming and therapeutic thing when it comes to my anxiety and depression and I could never live a day without it. You will never see me in the street without headphones in my ears and even when I'm at home there's music playing almost all the time. I could talk for hours about music and what it means to me. And otherwise I love to watch films and series (I like fantasy, horror, psychological thriller, science fiction and psychological drama and almost anything from the 70s, 80s and 90s). I love rainy days and to go outside while it's pouring big, fat drops. What I love the most is to drive around without a destination, while talking and listening to music. And I love to spend time with my cat, if I could, I would have endless animals who live peacefully and loved with me. I enjoy to have deep talks and to be challenged to think. I love to take late-night-strolls, while gazing into the sky and watching the stars/moon. I have a fascination for dark and macabre things.

I really hope that's not too much? But thank you anyway ♡

Have a good day!

thank you so much for your kind words, you have no idea how much it means to me to know that I was one of the first blogs you followed ;; here’s your vanilla milkshake - and it’s also my first time writing for peaky blinders, but I hope it’s alright; and I hope finn shelby will find the portrait I paint of him accurate enough...

Birmingham was a drab and disheartening place enough without the war adding to its joylessness; but somehow the streets are even worse to bear deserted than when they’re bustling and fetid. Especially for a ten year old boy who wants nothing but to play with someone, to talk to someone, to see someone.

With his brothers off fighting somewhere in France and his aunt too busy with her businesses (adult stuff that Finn has absolutey no interest in attempting to understand), the youngest Shelby has been fighting off an affliction worse than consumption and measles, because much more insidious for a boy his age; boredom

and he’s so sad, so irrevocably sad, with no one to bruise his knees with and throw mud at, that he just aimlessly wanders the empty streets whenever aunt Polly isn’t looking, to find a semblance of stimulation

(he used to enjoy the solitude, it gave him time to imagine delirious stories in fantastical worlds and read the most enthralling of novels, but not anymore. four years of reclusion is an awfully long time for a little boy.)

and it’s during one of his escapades that he first meets you

you’re a little girl his age, dressed in a pretty dress, wearing pretty booties and holding a pretty little woven basket, but your face is stuck on the most grouchy frown he’s ever seen on a little girl, and you don’t walk, you stomp down the wet pavement like a wrathful titan

And it’s probably the first time in four years that he’s been this close to making a new friend, so he walks up to you, despite how rusty his communication skills have become

“Girls don’t frown. It’s unbecoming.”

(Yes, pretty rusty indeed; but in his defense, he’s ten, he’s bored, he’s lonely, and he’s only ever heard Ada say it, and Ada is the most level-headed of his siblings, so anything she says must be true, right?)

“Shut up.”

(Well, if it was unbecoming of you to frown, it’s even more to rebuff someone so rudely. You don’t even spare a glance and continue walking; he has to hurry to catch up to you.)

“You can’t say that. It’s a bad word.”

“How do you know that?”

“My family says it all the time, but they told me I can’t say it.”

“Well, my family is not your family. And I hate my family!”

You’ve yelled the last words at the sky, so loud that the crows on the neighboring roofs have taken off in a startled flight.

“They want to wear this stupid dress to go to the stupid market to buy stupid meat. I don’t even want to eat meat, that’s cruel! And I don’t even want to wear a frilly dress! I want to wear black!”

And in saying so you tugged at the pink and white ribbons that encircled your waist.

And Finn couldn’t help being extremely intrigued at this little girl who said bad words and refused to eat meet and wanted to wear black. It was the most exciting thing to ever happen in all the duration of the war.

“You want to wear a black dress?”

“Yes, but my mama won’t let me. She says it’s too sad because of the war. But black isn’t sad! Black is beautiful!”

“Maybe I could find you a black dress. I’m sure my sister must have one. Where do you live?”

And, loyal to his promise, the following morning he had run to your doorstep and snuck into your house - a proper Shelby talent, to be able to go unnoticed or make a ruckus depending on the occasion - with an old, crinkled mourning dress of Ada’s, that had probably belonged to his mother and had been mended several times

And it was obviously five sizes too big for you and you looked more like a ghost from one of Finn’s horror novels, your arms floating in the sleeves and the hem of the skirt pooling at your feet, but your smile was the brightest light he’d ever seen in this whole damn town.

“Do you like it?”

(He didn’t really know why he sounds so nervous. Maybe it was having a friend, a real friend, and doing something personal for them... or maybe it had to do with how fast his heart beat, watching you in that gigantic, shapeless dress)

“I love it! Thank you so much, Finn!”

From then on started one of the most wonderful friendships Finn would ever have, and what would bring a ray of light to the grim existence of a little boy in the midst of a global war

Despite the ration cards, despite the loneliness, despite the worry that tugged at his stoic aunt’s eyes for her son and nephews across the Channel... he found an unspeakable solace in your friendship

And one day, without a trace, you were gone

He knocked on your door; gone. He asked all the neighbors what had happened to the family that lived there; gone. He wrote you letters and sent them to the confines of England; gone. He got scolded by Polly for marking numbers at random on Tommy’s state-of-the-art telephone; gone.

Suddenly he was back to the bleak existence he had battled with before meeting you, and the hollow inside his chest only grew wider as the days went on, because he had no explanation as to what had happened to you, and worried every single day

Thankfully, the war ended not long after, and his brothers came back home, all alive and unscathed - well, for the most part

Fast forward more or less ten years, and much has changed in Finn Shelby’s life and in old Birmingham, but the memory of you still stugs at his heartstrings

One evening, he’s tasked by Arthur to run some errands, send a few messages, scout a few places; the most dangerous thing his older brothers will ever let him do

His task leads him to a bar in the center of town, one that pours its joyous light and music into the street outside; he’s there to meet with a client, arrange a meeting; nothing he’s hasn’t done already

But the evening takes a turn for the unexpected when he recognizes the girl sat alone at a table, enjoying the musicians’ jazz with an air of pure bliss on her face

It’s been ten years, of course, but... it’s unmistakable. That face, that silhouette, and the black ensemble from head to toe... and he’s always had a knack for remembering faces, especially those that mark him deeply

Suddenly he’s frozen on the spot, and he has forgotten why he came to the bar in the first place, what his target looks like - all he knows is you, and how beautiful you look in the dim light of the bar, and the undisclosed and unknown feelings he had for you at the time come flooding back.

Except this time, he understands, and he fears them, because he doesn’t have time for any of this, and it’s way too dangerous for you and him

But he can’t just pass you by and not say a word?

He swallows, hard.

And walks up to you.

“Y/N?”

You open your eyes, and your face flashes with recognition, and a little bit of pain as well. Even if you fled without a word, and left him hanging all these years, he’s incapable of rancor

“Finn... wow, you’ve changed so much.”

“You haven’t.”

He gestures at your face, your clothes, how you savor the music like the finest drink in the world, and you laugh and blush, sending his heart into overdrive

“Where were you all this time?”

“I’m so sorry, Finn... my brother died in the war, and... my mom sent me to live with my grandparents in Scotland. We were all destroyed by grief... I needed to get away.”

“Without explanation? Not even a word?”

“I wanted to write to you, so bad, but... I couldn’t remember your address. I couldn’t remember anything about Birmingham at all...”

He nods, slowly, in understanding.

The war opens wounds that never heal, even after all the most beautiful friendships and love stories in the world.

“But I’m really glad I found you.”

His heart is pounding in his throat. Maybe it’s a sign of destiny that he found you here, tonight, alone, and ready to welcome him back. Maybe it’s a word from fate, that you can never truly be apart.

So he takes the seat in front of you, and you smile, that shy but bright smile of yours, and he forgets all about his mission, his client, and his brothers.

They’ll have to understand.

800 follower sleepover

[blueberrypossum]

Another Night hidden within the Stars

(GN)yokai cop x Dastardly Danny

Hey yall! I've had the wonderful opportunity to collab with @greaser-wolf and man has it been a wonderful experience! You are truly a lovely person and thank you again for the drawing!! This was super fun to write, with Danny and how he talks he's a challenge that I loved taking on. Hope you all enjoy!!

This story is gender neutral, but with it being fancy I will be putting tux/dress so then you, the reader, can wear whatever you want on your date with Danny ( also suspenders will be in the tux category and dress suits will still be in dress, hopefully that is okay with everyone because I do want to put detail into your outfit).

⚠️WARNING⚠️: There are cuss words and also mention of sexual content along with yearning and making out!!!

Word Vocabulary:

FC- favorite color

Take a powder- Get lost or lay off

Crumb-A jerk, no fun

Eager Beaver- Someone who excited about something 

Cut a rug- Dance with me

Dead Hopper- A bad dancer

Jive dancer- A talented dancer

You could feel yourself slowly growing impatient as you waited outside of the restaurant, your foot tapping against the concrete with a jittery rhythm. Dastardly Danny was never the late type, he would make the joke of being fashionably late whenever he and the rest of his crew had a runin with trouble, but you knew by now that he would make sure his schedule was clear the days you would meet up. Especially after the time he and his friends literally rode to the place you were meeting up in a snail cop car, a sheepish smile curling against his mouth. 

You remember the awful paperwork for that one.

The night of the Hidden City glistened around you as you leaned against the building, your hands rubbing up against your arms to create some friction of warmth. Even with the outfit you had on, the nights were slowly getting chilly due to the change of seasons above. 

The bag you held against your side started to vibrate and for a second you thought it was going to be that purple wearing rat, telling you that something had happened or that he was going to be fashionably late, but it was actually your boss from the police station. You cleared your throat before you clicked on the answer button.

“Yes, chief?”

“Hello Y/N, I was seeing if you would be free tonight to work an extra shift?”

You balled your empty hand into a fist as you jumped from your spot against the building, your eyes glaring to the side as if you could see your boss there, looming over you with a smile that practically said: “ If you don’t say yes to this then I will give you paperwork that is stacked so high that the humans above can see it.”

You let out a breathy sigh as you explained, “I’m sorry, chief, but I have plans tonight and I really cannot cancel them.” You turned on your heel so that your shoulder was leaning against the wall instead of your back.

You could hear the anger and frustration behind his voice, “Are you sure that whatever is so important cannot be rescheduled?”

“No, it cannot.”

You almost jumped right out of your body as a voice behind you answered for you. Your face started to blush against the amber lights of the restaurant as Danny was now leaning his head against your shoulder, a wicked grin on his face as he continued to talk.

“Sorry there, chief, but being a cop can be a real pain in the neck, so take a powder and let me and the dame have our night, alright?”

You opened your mouth to apologize to your boss, to say that your boyfriend had just had a little too much to drink and was now saying whatever came to mind, but the tall rat’s hot breath against your neck made you stiff as a board. You swallowed and suddenly you felt parched as Danny took the phone from your hand and hung up on the chief of police and placed the phone back into your bag. 

“Ya know you can get lockjaw if ya keep that mouth open for too long,” he chirped as he took your hand into his. 

“You’re….You’re late,” you stammered out, your mind foggy with the possible fear of losing your job and also how Danny’s suit was cleaner and seemed to cling to his body tighter than before. 

He bent himself over and kissed your hand as he looked up at you with hooded eyes.

“Actually, love, I still have about two minutes. Would ya like me to walk away and come back and get ya flustered all over again?” 

“Oh hush up, you could’ve gotten me fired and he could've figured out your voice,” you commented, your heart almost futtering out of your chest as his lips met your hand. Always so formal, strange how a gentleman could also be a thief. 

Danny rolled his eyes and let out a ‘tch’ sound as he took in the sight of you. Your outfit was glistening against the fallen lights of the town, the color bringing out the color in your eyes. Danny was surprised that he still had his balance as he took a step back. No matter how many times he lays his eyes on you, you can always somehow leave him breathless.

He intertwined his arm with yours as he chuckled out, “Yer boss is a bloody crumb, darling, and if he could recognize my’ voice, toots, then there would be more criminals in yer holding cells.”

“You know I can just turn you three in and get that raise, right?” 

“Ah but you would never do that to us, especially me, sweetheart,” he purred as took your chin gently into his hand and kissed you. All the stress that had built up within your body for the past few days melted away as he pulled you in closer to the kiss, your knees almost going weak as you felt him smile against your lips. His hand was careful against your cheek, as if his destructive and dangerous life would break you, even with you being a cop. His whiskers tickled your face and you couldn’t help but giggle into the kiss, causing Danny to bring you closer to him at the sound of your happiness. 

After the kiss, he planted one against your cheek and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. 

“You look ravishing tonight, ” He purred as he led you over to the door, his arm already extending it to open it for you.

You let out a sigh as you pushed the fabric you were wearing down to wash out the wrinkles.

“You don’t think it’s too much?” You asked as Danny told the hostess the fake name he placed for the dinner reservation. As the hostess turned around to grab a few menus, Danny let go of your arm and ever so slowly danced his hand from the nap of your neck, down your spine until it planted itself onto your tailbone as he whispered into your ear, “Oh sweetheart, if we weren’t in this restaurant, I know exactly what I would be having for dinner instead.”

He smirked as a pretty shade of red crossed your face and even tinted the edge of your ears as the hostess turned back around and told you both to follow her. Danny had to practically drag you since your mind was nothing but a haze of embarrassment and desire. 

The tall rat yokai pulled your chair for you and you thanked him as he pushed you closer to the table and took a seat himself.

You took in the sight of the restaurant with a look of awe. The eating house was colored with wine and gold and the building was buzzing with life of friends and family and lovers just like you and him. You both had made sure, with the help of a worker there, that no cop or detective had placed a reservation at the restaurant, so no more looking over your shoulder or horror stabbing you in the gut when you watched yokais whisper and look over at you. 

Danny watched as you took it all in, an almost lovesick expression crossing his face. Everytime you both went out he would remember the first time you both met, with your pistol shoved into his face. Dating a cop was something that never crossed his mind, he always thought he would date a thief such as himself or maybe a regular citizen of the Hidden City. But, when you first chased him, screaming his name at the top of lungs, he knew it was love at first sight. 

He did hate the secrecy though, even with the thrill of getting caught was something he got high off of, he did want to show you off to the world, he wanted to take you out everywhere without any of your coworkers finding you. At least you both got to do this, and he knew how to mark you as his. 

The option of you quitting your job raged inside his head, the sheer thought of it made him mad. He would never let you give up your passion, how hard you’ve worked for your position at work, even though you said you would be fine with it, he wouldn’t be, and knew that you secretly wouldn’t be either.  

“So, I heard about that heist you did a few days ago, how did it go?” You questioned as you laid your head in your hands, your elbows supporting your weight. Danny let out a gust of air as he also leaned in, taking in the breathtaking sight that was you. 

“Don’t even get me started, sweetheart. Leonard is doing the chores for the rest of da month for the stunt he pulled during it,” the rat groaned and soon a waitress came up and Danny ordered one of their expensive wines, once she walked away, you raised an eyebrow at him. 

“Wine, huh? That heist money really working itself off, isn’t it?” You played at him and he let out a low gruff as he smirked at you. 

“Only using the money for good, right?”

“Oh and I’m considered good?”

Danny gave you a hungry look and for a moment you thought he was going to get out of the chair and eat you up in one bite, but all he did was bring his hands together  on the table as he leisurely spoke. 

“Of course.”

Oh titans above how was I so lucky to land him.

You both ordered your meals and continued to have small talk. One thing you both decided to agree on was that Danny would talk about opposing gangs that were doing heists and robberies and then would tell you about them the next stop they were going to, with this you were given praise and extra cash at work and giving The Mud Dogs less competition in the playing field. It made Danny warm inside to see you have an interest in his job and it made you bashful when he would compliment you on your job.

In the background of your conversation was the beauty of musicians playing their hearts out for those who were out on the dancefloor, the restaurant was flooded with intoxicated laughter and the tapping of shoes against the wooden floor. The wine was slowly getting to you after the third glass and you couldn’t help but to start giggling after every word you said. 

After the waitress took your plates and left the check, you and Danny had to fight over who would pay. 

“You paid last time, I'll pay it,” you ordered as your fingers tried to swipe it from his hands, but he was a lot quicker than you and he let the bill twirl in between his fingers as he stared at you. 

“Not a chance, eager beaver, the deal is that you bring your decked out self and I get to gawk at ya until I need to pay the bill,” he insisted and was about to pull out his credit card before he felt your fingers touch his and soon the bill was gone from his hands and all he could do was glare lovingly at you as you giggled in your seat, the piece of paper shoved under your hands. 

“Yer not gonna give up, are ya?”

“Isn’t that what you like about me?”

His eyes traveled over your body slowly, hardly an ounce of urgency in them as he took in every inch of you. The curve of your waist, the way your outfit was flushed against your body like water to paper, how there were still love marks on your chest and barely above your neck from your last visit with each other. Desire was blazing through his eyes as they finally met yours. 

“Oh sugar pop, there is a whole list of things I like about you,” he growled and he took pride in the way you squirmed in your seat.

He eyed the dancefloor and then back at you and gradually got himself out of his chair until he was next to you, his hand extended out. 

“How about this: You cut a rug with me and you get to pay, deal?” He asked. You looked down at his extended hand and then back at his smug look, wondering if the wine had somehow gotten more to him then you. 

“Oh please, you know I have two left feet. If we danced your feet would be sore for weeks from me stepping on them,” you joked out, but he didn't move. 

“If ya were a dead hopper, I wouldn’t be askin. That or else I get to pay the bill,” he challenged. You didn’t know if it was the pride you held or from the extra glass of wine you swigged down, but you took his hand and let him lead you to the dancefloor. 

The music buzzed through your ears as you held tighter to his hand. You had fought bad guys, you had been in blazing shootouts, you’ve seen life be taken away right in front of your eyes. But dancing seemed to be the hardest challenge to muster up courage to master. Danny gave your hand a reassuring squeeze as he took you both to the middle of the dancefloor. 

He took the hand he was holding and extended your arm with his, while his other arm went around your waist, bringing you almost dangerously close. You could smell the alcohol on his breath and his cologne drained through your nose. 

“Danny, what if we get caught? Everyone can see us,” you whispered. Many eyes were peering at you two, some just being distracted by the new movement you both caused and others eyeing the rat as if they recognized him. Fear started to snake itself around your body, almost trapping you once again in that constant fear of being discovered. 

But, the love of your life gently tapped his nose against yours as he shushed you so quietly that you could barely hear it. His calming scent and even breaths washed over you and you felt yourself relax. No one has ever made you feel like this, no past lover, no family or friend, Danny wasn’t just a breath of fresh air to you, he was a whole new world to you. 

“Hey, just let me show you off for just a few minutes, just this once, doll. Then we can go back to being Romeo and Juilet, I promise,” he purred and you silently nodded as he swept you off your feet. It almost seemed that the musicians took notice in the new lovebirds and the music picked up to match the tense and eager atmosphere, even the yokais around you took hints and their own moves started to change. 

Both of your dance moves were slow at first, the rat yokai letting you get used to him taking the lead, with his quick feet and swirls and twirls, you were a little shocked at how well he was. He held onto you though, taking in your cautious swings and how your eyes were on your feet instead of up. Danny knew he was selfish for asking this out of you, he knew that you didn’t want to embarrass yourself in front of him. But the way you looked on the dancefloor was almost bewitching. Your tux/dress flew silently around you, the tone of your (FC) shined against the spotlight that twirled overhead, and your eyes almost seemed to glow in the scarlet and golden room, outshining and blinding anyone else around him.

He knew then he was deeply and terribly in love with you.

“My eyes are up here, toots.”

“So is that sarcastic mouth of yours.”

“You really do crack me up, dollface.”

He then let go of your waist and swept you away from him, the only thing connecting you two was the interlocking of your hands. Starlight seemed to bounce off you because he quickly brought you back to him, a little noise escaping your mouth as it felt as if you were dancing on air for how light he made you feel. He was behind you now, his mouth dangerous close to where your neck connected with your shoulder. His breath created goosebumps across your body as a feather kiss was placed against an old love mark he had given you days ago. Your heart seemed to go crazy within your ribcage as he twisted you around, your chests once again flushed against each other’s. Danny took several steps to your side and you quickly joined him, the wine and your wit gradually giving you confidence and soon you both were laughing, as if there was no one else in the restaurant, in the city, in the world. 

He took notice in your new found bravely and he swiped his arm under your rump and lifted you up, his smile growing wider as a flood of giggles escaped your mouth as you looked down at him. 

“Hey look! I’m finally taller than you!”

“Aye, don’t get used to it!”

He brought you back down and in one swope he dipped you, his strong hands holding you firmly as your back bent against him. It almost felt like a dream, a wondrous and unbelievable dream that you thought if you made one wrong move, you would fall out of bed and this would no longer be real. But the way he effortlessly pulled you back up and looked into your eyes with a lopsided grin, you knew that this wasn’t just a dream, it was a dream come true. 

The song smoothly started to transition over to a much more tamed and kinder music that had everyone’s swaying hips go slower and closer. You were still giggling as Danny brought you against him and suddenly it was very cozy between you two. 

You let the melody consume you as Danny lightly drifted you throughout the dancefloor, his face ever so slowly getting closer to yours. His hands were roaming your back as he brought you ever so closer to him to the point you both were barely missing each other’s toes. Suddenly it seemed like you both were spinning around each other until his lips barely slipped over yours. 

“Look who’s become a jive dancer,” he said silently against your lips and a little groan escaped your lips at just hearing him talk to you like that, every word he ever whispered to you in private with no wondering eyes would burn you to your core. 

“I had a good teacher,” you joked back as your hands wrapped around his neck, your nails every so slightly digging into his fur. You felt him lose his breath against your face and his own fingers dug into your lower back and suddenly it felt as if you both weren’t close enough. You both were never close enough. 

“Have I mentioned how ravishing you look tonight?” He asked as he leisurely twirled you and brought you back to him. 

“Maybe. But it's nice to hear it from such a dreamboat like you,” you said against his lips and he dipped you once again, but you barely made it pass his shoulder as he pushed his mouth against yours. A whirlwind of emotions surfaced throughout your body as your hand came up and caressed his face, your stomach dropping to the floor and your heart traveling up your throat. 

He separated himself from you for just a second to bring you back up on your feet before attacking your lips again, one of his hands on the nap of your neck to tilt your head more up. 

You were aware of the suspicious and judging eyes that fell upon you both, but for the first time, you didn’t care. He made you worry less, he gave you such an intoxication that not a single bottle of alcohol could ever get you as drunk as he did. The aftertaste of wine drifted onto your lips and you moaned into his mouth, grinning evilly as he shifted in his spot. His tail soon curled around your waist so that his other hand could go to the side of your face. 

He detached himself from you for just a second to say, “ Ya better pay that bill before the only thing yer wearing is that smile.”

The world seemed to freeze before you as your hands slipped off of him and walked him over back to the table, the bill trembling in your hands as you paid for it, all while feeling Danny’s hand place itself lower than your back. You can feel sweat slowly start to build over your body as he opened the door for you and followed you out the door. 

And before you knew it, you were back at your place, and once Danny closed the door behind you, he pounced, as if he wasn’t the rat, but the cat. His hands traveled over your outfit as if it burned his hands and couldn’t keep them in one spot and his kisses were slow and teasing, causing you to squirm under his touch. You couldn’t breath, you couldn’t hear anything, all you felt was the buzzing against your fingertips as they dug into his chest, your hands had already done the work to undo his tie and his undershirt. 

The door met your back and Danny was panting against your lips, his mind had gone completely blank except for you, he only thought about you and this moment, how it might be days until he saw you again. The thought of not seeing you stabbed him in the gut, and he’s known that feeling before, and it’s not a good feeling. He missed hearing your laughter, he desired to see your glistening eyes look at him, he wanted to be with you. It drove him nuts, no, it drove him insane at the thought of it. That once he woke up from your bed, he would have to sneak out early so that no one would see him leave your home and would have to race back to his apartment instead of laying with you and getting to wake up with you in the morning. He’s never been here when you woke up, he’s never been able to see your eyes flutter open and for the first thing for you to see in the morning was him, he’s never been able to see the morning light shine against your features as if the sun was trying to capture your face. He’s never been able to share the first cup of coffee with you, to see his pjs shirt draped over you like a blanket as you watch the morning go by, as he would watch you with loving eyes. And that’s what drove him to kiss you harder, that’s what pushed him to pull your head back and for him to replace your old love marks with new ones, it’s what forced him to savor every second of this, to cherish what you give him tonight, he would cherish every damn second you gave to him in secret. 

[undertheknightwing]

2021 FIC YEAR IN REVIEW

hi yes I'm late, tumblr hasn't been very kind to me with mentions lately?? but anyway thank you @not-so-mundane-after-all-97 for the tag!! 🖤

Total number of completed works: 16

Total word count: man, I can't do math.. it's probably a lot though

Fandoms written in: my beloveds,, Titans and Superman & Lois

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d expected?: I guess I wrote more than I thought I would tbh. I normally can never finish multi-chaptered fics since my motivation runs out so quickly but thanks to my friends support and amazing comments I got so much done this year!

What’s your own favorite story of the year?: OH BOY OKAY I'm having so much spooky fun writing the mystery that is i took a little journey to the unknown but my heart belongs to my pride and joy Escapism which is a multi-chaptered fic with a shit ton of chapters planned set in my au New Blood where Gar accidentally gets sent to Earth-Prime and gets taken in by the Kents. I've never wrote an au from the very beginning and had a set timeline from 'season premiere' to 'season finale'. That makes it a lot easier to understand what's going and what I'm writing next, what I have to foreshadow and what details to hide in that make sense later on.

Did you take any writing risks this year?: I wrote about a ship I thought the Titans fandom would chop my head off for writing because it seemed like G*rchel and J*yG*r were the the only "acceptable" ships for Gar in the fandom.

Do you have any fanfic or profic goals for the new year?: Chill out a little, stop rushing and guilt tripping myself into writing when I really don't want to. And stop planning too much just to drop them next week. Focus on finishing what needs to be finished then start newer things. Don't bite off more than I can chew.

Most popular story of the year?: i took a little journey to the unknown with 1813 hits and 68 kudos, second place and catching up fast is Escapism with 1506 hits but with more kudos at 82! Both pretty much tied in comments as well.

Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion: oh that award has got to go to weaponized fear. I really got into the mindset of how I thought Gar would feel and took inspiration from the playlist I created for it and other DC media about Scarecrow's fear toxin. Hell, I cried while writing it lol. But I kind of knew it wouldn't get a lot of hits because it's Gar-focused only, explaining a backstory he never got in canon and other things. Gar might be a fan favorite when watching the show but he really isn't in fan content, unless he's being a love interest or sidekick to Jason or Rachel. The fandom isn't really in the market for Gar-focused works.

Most fun story to write: I love writing my spooky au Cryptic Constellations since so many people like it but ESCAPISM HAS MY HEART AND SOUL OKAY IT'S JUST SO MUCH FUN TO WRITE!! I'm so proud of it, it's definitely my best work!! you can tell when reading it that I put my heart into every line ❤️

Most unintentionally telling story: at some point in almost all my fics Gar has to show up or be mentioned lmao I physically can not write a story without my boy popping in as him or in dialogue.

Biggest disappointment: umm.. not really anything?

Biggest surprise: I don't know? lol maybe how quickly I'm writing New Blood's fic. That au gives me so much motivation and good vibes it's insane! 😄 It's given me so much motivation that I even drew scenes from the fic in my sketchbook!