#I've been having something of a rough time of it lately so I actually broke and made myself some SCII hurt/comfort for a change of pace
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Lose myself to you (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#ZEX#The Captain#Vent?? Maybe??#I've been having something of a rough time of it lately so I actually broke and made myself some SCII hurt/comfort for a change of pace#I almost never make hurt/comfort - more of a whump creator haha ♪ - but yeah I needed it#It ended up just being a short little 1.6k jaunt but I did do it all in one sitting and got some needed emotions out so thank you these two#I think it's also my first vent fic :0 So that's interesting!#As well as the first one that I inserted images into! I've been wanting to for a while but I never have! I know how to now! :D#Constantly thinking about how oddly on equal footing these two are despite being so different#It makes the way they differ so interesting!#They're both important figures in their respective military forces and yet the Captain is so young!#Not only a lack of experience leading to the blows hitting him harder proportionally but also just - that's just how teenage human brains do#(If the Captain is still a teen - it's gotten very stuck to me that he hasn't quite turned 20 yet haha)#But again again even still he's a very young and new adult - there's a lot of chemistry going on in his brain that makes the job hard#And so having ZEX as a partner and a mentor - it creates a weird dynamic! It's interesting to me#ZEX /is/ definitely weird towards the Captain haha but past a certain point he really does only have so much power over him#And I just like it better when he guides him over trying to control him <3 Usually anyway lol - in this instance for sure#Their weird dynamic being a source of comfort and escape ♥ Of ZEX being gentle with him while still working to his own ends haha#ZEX is such an interesting character; he's hard to classify and I like that about him very much
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𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥 𝐝𝐚𝐝! 𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐮𝐧𝐚 ꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹
featuring. sukuna ryomen x reader
warnings. sukuna wanted a son, but got a daughter instead (he's smitten for her shh), sukuna is modern af bye he knows how to use a phone ok, reader is called "wife", ooc sukuna bye
note. ok listen, i've been having a girl dad sukuna brainrot lately. and i even gave out a req to @rrairey (u go check out her works rn) — but i just had to write something about girl dad sukuna jsjdksjks it's on my mind 25/8 and i can't stop unless i actually write abt him (i'm lying, he's still going to be in my mind bye).
girl dad! sukuna who initially wanted a son but when he finds out he's going to be having a daughter instead, he didn't know how to feel. he thought that if he had a son, he could at least play "rough" with him. it's sukuna, he doesn't know what soft is.
girl dad! sukuna who has to secretly watch tutorial videos on the most random thing like "how to play nicely with your daughter" or "how to be nice to your daughter". but also searches up for things like "easy hairstyles to give your daughter for beginners", when your daughter isn't even born yet.
girl dad! sukuna who hates to admit it but he's pretty worried about having a daughter. finally shoves his ego down his throat and comes up to you to talk about it, and you encouraged that he's going to be a good father — but still, he's worried.
"ryo, you're worried about what exactly?" you asked the male, brushing his hair.
"not being a good father." he replies, leaning into your touch with a big frown on his face, grumbling under his breath slightly about how embarrassed he is to be so fragile in front of his own wife.
"baby, you're going to be the best father."
although your words were supposed to be encouraging, and he did feel a bit of burden lift off of his shoulders — the male still couldn't help but to worry about his unborn daughter.
girl dad! sukuna who complains about your pregnancy cravings and how his daughter is a weird baby. despite that, he will go out of his way to get you what you wanted, not caring if it was two in the morning, or five in the morning. he will get it for you and your growing daughter inside your belly.
girl dad! sukuna who grows anxious when your due date was inching closer. he took a break off from work and devoted his time to look after you, especially since you were walking for two right now. even if you did tell your husband that you were fine — he still thinks it's his job to look after you and your daughter.
"damn it brat, stop moving so much. you'll hurt yourself," he gently tugs on your arm, directing you to the couch, "what'dya want?"
"sausages and blueberry jam . . ." you tell him nonchalantly, missing the look of disgust on his face.
". . . just stay there." he walks a few steps before turning back, "don't move."
girl dad! sukuna who watches labor videos only to focus on the husbands and what they were doing in it so he could try to take notes and searches for what he should get ready for labor, or if he could do anything as a husband for his wife during labor. the results didn't ease his worries — they added up his worries. like adding fuel to the fire, the internet tells him that giving birth was the second most painful thing after getting burned alive.
girl dad! sukuna who already thought of names for your daughter and even buys things for her. telling you that he'd be out to grab a few things and then coming back with a crib set, toys, or even a baby walker. he even got a baby strap for both you and him to use, picking out the most random motives like skulls and fires.
"ryo, why did you pick that motive?" you asked, eyeing the baby strap that had white skulls all over.
"our daughter will like that. i know it." he retorts.
girl dad! sukuna who looked as calm as a cucumber but internally panics the most when your water broke. he grabs the bag that he had packed, following a youtube tutorial and helped you get into the car so that the both of you can finally drive off to the hospital. he holds your hand tightly along the way, showing his worry as he "tries" to follow driving laws (which he ended up driving past the speed limit and had to get a ticket in the hospital).
girl dad! sukuna who had to pay a ticket as you were tended in a hospital room (you didn't know about this and he didn't tell you about it so you won't worry). the doctor telling both you and him that the labor procedure will have to wait up to a few hours as they proceeded with "watchful waiting" after they checked on the baby's condition and yours so they could see if it was safe for you to give birth normally.
girl dad! sukuna who waited those long hours with you as you laid on the bed, telling him how nervous you are. and all the bad possibilities that could happen (he searched that up too), he tells you to stop saying those kind of things. sukuna wasn't angry — he just didn't want you to stress so much, rubbing circles on the back of your hand with his thumb to soothe you. he didn't let go until the doctor came back to finally do something.
girl dad! sukuna who was inside the delivery room with you, even after telling you that he won't come inside a few months ago. holds onto your hand (which you were holding onto tightly as the procedure goes on for hours), he winces — but he didn't care about his hand right now, he only cares about you and his daughter. brushing your hair lightly, mumbling out hushed praises to you (unknowingly, it just comes out), wipes away your sweat with his bare fingers and pressing kisses onto your face every single time he feels your hand clenching around his.
"jus' a bit more, pretty." he whispers, kissing your knuckles multiple times before moving on to kiss your forehead, "a bit more."
girl dad! sukuna who almost bursts into tears when he heard the loud cry of your daughter, but blinked his tears back. peering slightly at your worn out face. he tells you how he's proud of you (spoiler: he hates it if you reminded him about it in the future).
"y'hear that? you did so good, pretty. 'm proud of you," he clung onto your hand, grazing his thumb over your forehead as a smile adorned his face, "she's here, baby."
girl dad! sukuna who couldn't hold his tears back when the nurse suggested skin-to-skin contact with the father. he wasted no time tugging his shirt off to hold his little bundle of joy, nestling her in his arms — unknowingly letting a few stray tears of joy out as he coos down to his newborn daughter.
"oh, you're so pretty, little one." he cradled her gently against his bulky arms, sniffling softly. he was so gentle — different from how he used to be, his eyes soft and watery as he affectionately stares down at his now sleeping daughter.
girl dad! sukuna who slept on a chair by your bed when the doctor told you that you'll be allowed to go home once your body is fit again, he didn't care that he didn't have a bed to lie on. he was just there, prepped in a chair as his fingertips touched your wrist near the IV injection on the back of your hand. making sure he didn't touch the transparent hose. and his eyes darted back and forth from your resting form and his daughter who was now all warm and bundled up inside a bassinet. making sure that the both of you are resting well even if he was barely able to open his eyes fully.
girl dad! sukuna who carried all your bags and your daughter's car seat with ease while leading you down the hospital hallways and to the car. helping you buckle your seatbelt and making sure that his daughter is going to be safe and sound during the ride home, prepping up the car seat like he learned, giving his daughter a light kiss on her head before closing the door.
girl dad! sukuna who tells you to rely on him every time his daughter wakes up in the middle of the night — he won't let you get up, gently tugging you down onto the bed and tucking you underneath the covers before leaving to tend your daughter without any other words. as if his daughter is the most fragile thing in the world, he carries her into his arms and hushed her softly, nuzzling his nose onto her head, trying to get her back to sleep.
"shh, baby, mama's tired right now . . . go back to bed." he whispers, kissing her small forehead.
girl dad! sukuna who offered to shower your baby for the first time after two weeks upon arriving back home (under your watch of course), as you filled the bathinette with warm water — sukuna was cradling her in his arms, swaying his body side to side. and when you tell him the water's ready, sukuna prepped his big hand behind your daughter's small head so the water won't go to her face and began cleaning her. concentrating, he wets his finger and traced it over his daughter's face, making sure she's not frightened. and once he's done, he cupped his hand and scooped some water to wet her hair, rubbing her head lovingly.
girl dad! sukuna who's personality did a somersault ever since you were pregnant with his daughter. turning soft and more clingy, he has your daughter strapped to his chest. and will tell you that he's got it every time his daughter cries or ruined her diapers, he's learnt it all thanks to other great dads on youtube.
girl dad! sukuna who was even more ecstatic than you are when his daughter said her first word, which was of course "mama", he didn't care that she didn't say "dada", he focuses on the fact that his daughter had grown so much to be able to say her first word. tells your bundle of joy how proud he is of her even if she probably doesn't understand her father.
"maa..ma."
sukuna who had his eyes on the television immediately darted to his daughter who was in your hold, his lips were slightly parted as he tries to process what just happened, "did . . . did she . . ?"
when you confirmed his question, he pulled you into his arms and kissed your head before kissing your daughter's head, muttering out a, "papa's proud of you, baby."
girl dad! sukuna who treats both you and your daughter like the most precious beings in the world. he. spoils. you. both. to no end, coming home from work with a present for the both of you. mostly food for you, and a toy for your daughter. you just know [daughter] is going to grow up spoiled by her father.
girl dad! sukuna who spoils your daughter rotten. and ever since her first steps — he's been going out with her to no end, of course going out as a family of three. holding your daughter's chubby little hands as he guided her down the street, earning coos from strangers all around him.
"good girl, that's right . . . left and right." he said softly, watching [daughter] walk slowly, still a little wobbly.
girl dad! sukuna who gets a little emotional when your daughter has her first birthday — because, it's been that fast? he tries not to cry, i swear. but silently slips inside the bathroom and lets a few one out before coming out like he didn't just cry over his daughter growing up too fast. he swore it was just yesterday that he was in the hospital.
girl dad! sukuna who will with no shame, participate in tea parties with his daughter once she's known enough about it. you'd call them both down for dinner and when they didn't, you decided to be the one to approach them inside [daughter]'s room. and there he was, sitting on the floor, to his left and right were [daughter]'s stuffed animals and your daughter was sitting across from sukuna with a silver tiara on.
"this looks fun," you chuckled, eyeing them.
"mama! tea party?" [daughter] beams out at you, you walked over to them and carried your daughter into your arms, "mama, no tea party?"
"after dinner, baby. okay?"
sukuna has no shame in it. at first, he did try to decline his daughter, telling her that she should ask you instead, but your daughter looked so crestfallen that he just has to accept — which turned out to be a daily thing now. a tea party.
girl dad! sukuna who will be his daughter's experiment subject to trying out make ups. he's a little skeptical (lies, he's very skeptical), but it's not like this is the first time he's had make up put on his face. he's had his fair share of you trying to put make up on him, but this was a toddler doing it and not a full grown adult. but he couldn't say no, so he just submits to his daughter and lets her modify his face and clips on cute hairclips to his hair.
"mama mama! look at papa," your daughter cheers, pointing at sukuna. and you laugh, carrying your daughter before approaching the male who was sitting down on the floor in the living room.
"you look pretty, ryo."
"i feel pretty, my little girl did it to me." he rolls his eyes before grabbing a mirror to look at his face.
eh, not bad.
girl dad! sukuna who drops his daughter off for the first day of pre-school, telling her that she should punch anyone who messes with her (thankfully nobody yet). and gets a bit emotional again as she walks inside the building, his eyes going glassy watching her skip inside her new chapter.
girl dad! sukuna who's overprotective when it comes to his little girl. a trip to the park was a daily routine for his family — and believe me when he has eyes everywhere for his little girl, if anyone was bothering her, he would have no fear on finding out who their parent was. taking matters into his own hands, leaving the children out of it. as much as he wanted to confront the kid for bothering his little princess, he knew the parents had the most fault.
"your boy has issues. the next time he lays his hand on my girl, i will come for you." he said to the boy's father before walking back to you.
the boy and his father never came back to the park after that day.
girl dad! sukuna who watches his daughter grow from a small girl to an eight year old in a matter of what felt like a week. he swore yesterday she was just babbling out her first word, and the next thing he knows, she's got a "boyfriend" at school? oh, boy.
"you don't have a boyfriend." he mutters out, eyeing his daughter.
"yes i do have a boyfriend," your daughter replies back with her soft voice.
"no."
the banter continued until your daughter ended up in tears, and sukuna had to force himself to say that she indeed had a boyfriend in school. he's upset that she's growing up too quickly, but at the same time — he's proud of his little girl.
girl dad! sukuna who finds out you were pregnant with a second child, who turned out to be another girl. and he was still as loving and caring like he was with his first daughter, this time, he had a helping hand to take care of you.
"mama has a baby in her belly, so you can't be too rough on her, okay?" he baby talks his eight year old daughter like she's still a small baby — he softly caresses your clothed stomach as he speaks to her.
girl dad! sukuna who had to see his first daughter cry over her new "soon to be" born baby sibling. thinking both you and him were not going to love her anymore — and his heart breaks, because why would he not love his princess anymore?
"hey, hey, why're you cryin'?" sukuna tucks [daughter]'s hair behind her ear as she lets out a few fat tears out of her eyes.
"mama and papa will still love me, right?" she asks, her voice breaking slightly.
sukuna pulls the young girl into his embrace, holding her with one of his arm as he wipes her tears with his other, "'f course mama and i will still love you, you're our princess."
girl dad! sukuna who proudly watches his big girl now approaching his newborn daughter and her sister, eyeing the baby with such an innocent glint in her eyes. oh, and big girl? doesn't matter, to sukuna, your first daughter will always be his little girl.
© CHURIPU 2024 , DO NOT COPY OR REPOST ANYWHERE
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen fluff#fluff#jjk#jjk fluff#sukuna#sukuna ryomen#jujutsu kaisen sukuna#sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna#sukuna x you#sukuna x y/n#jjk sukuna#i love him#ryomen#sukuna ryomen x reader#sukuna fluff#modern sukuna
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Warm Shadows - The Working of Your Hands [4/4*]
Collection: Warm Shadows Chapter Title: The Working of Your Hands Characters/Pairings: Alpha!Bucky x f!Omega!Reader, Alpha!Steve x f!Omega!Reader. Bucky x Reader x Steve Word Count: 15.5k
Summary: With your original Alpha returned to you and your new alpha waiting in the wings, uncertainty can finally be dealt with and whatever the uncharted future will be, at least you can figure out what it will be. Big questions loom, possibilities must be considered, and the chasm of what the three of you have been through must be confronted.
Content Warnings: dark themes and experiences discussed, a/b/o dynamics, angst; explicit smut: oral (m and f receiving), vaginal intercourse, double penetration, unprotected sex
Additional Notes: I've been working on this chapter for a very long time. I finally got some renewed inspiration for it recently, and I originally had hoped to finish it for @biteofcherry's birthday because she's one of the biggest supporters for this story, but it wasn't quite ready for you then darling, so... slightly belated birthday. BUT ALSO! It did so much better than I dreamed it would in my 2200 Followers Celebration poll, actually coming in the top four, so I really kicked things into gear, and thought it would be a fitting gift for ALL OF YOU now that I actually hit 2300 this week!
↠ Masterlist | Aspen's Ask Box | Field Guide to the Forest
The sun is deliciously warm on your face as you shift and begin to wake up. Your body feels sated and content and initially that doesn’t seem strange, except your heart backtracks when you reach for Bucky only to find empty space on the bed next to you.
Another dream. Again.
Except there’s music playing softly from the little device in your hand – the one Bucky had shared with you!
Your face splits into a massive grin.
What’s more, you can feel the tie to your alpha again. The afternoon floods back into your mind, and you press your fingers over the bonding mark on your neck, warmth radiating through your chest. As you sit up and look around, through the bond you can tell that although he’s not there in the little cottage, he is close by.
So is your other alpha – you can feel him, too.
But that feeling is also different.
The bond between you and this version of Steve had crashed into your being as a hard and rough force. It had remained a hard presence - like a wall - while he kept you with him at the first Hydra facility, but lost the roughness by degrees over those initial weeks. When he worked you through your heat, broke and admitted some of what happened to turn him to the dark Captain Hydra, and orchestrated the escape for the two of you from the second facility, the bond had changed again. The wall morphed to more of what you could only describe as a firm hand against your chest, still holding you at bay, but more of a tangible connection.
And now something has altered it again. It's a hand against your chest, but not pushing up against you.
You know the only feasible reason Bucky would have left you had to have been to confront Steve, and the shift must be due to whatever has happened or words exchanged between them.
You slide of the bed and reach for your scattered clothes to get dressed. Your fingers tremble slightly as you pull them on, the fabric soft against your skin. You focus your senses, attuned to every whisper of movement outside. The wooden floorboards creak softly beneath your bare feet as you pad towards the window, drawing back the thin curtain to peer outside. The late afternoon light streaming through a partly cloudy sky bathes the surrounding forest in a golden glow. A gentle breeze carries the scent of pine and earth and wildflowers, mingling with something distinctly... alpha.
You catch a glimpse of movement between the trees. A flash of metal - Bucky's arm? - glints in the sunlight before disappearing again. Your heart races, the bond thrumming with proximity and anticipation. You press your hand against the cool glass, straining to see more.
Then, like a mirage solidifying, you spot them clearly. Bucky and Steve stand in a small clearing just beyond the treeline, their postures tense but not combative. Even from this distance, you can see the set of Bucky's jaw, the way Steve's hands clench and unclench at his sides. They're talking, but their voices are too low and their distance too far for you to make out any of their conversation.
You watch intently as the two alphas interact with each other. Your mind races with questions. What are they saying? How much more does Bucky know about what happened now? How will this change things between all of you?
Their body language speaks volumes - Bucky's shoulders are squared, his stance protective, while Steve's posture is more open, but far more alert and searching. You can feel the push and pull of their emotions through the bonds, a swirling mix of anger, guilt, confusion, and... hope?
Suddenly, Bucky takes a step forward, his hand outstretched. Steve tenses for a moment, then slowly, cautiously, reaches out to clasp Bucky’s forearm. The gesture is familiar, reminiscent of their old camaraderie, and it makes your heart clench.
As if sensing your gaze, Steve's head snaps up, his gaze locking onto the window where you stand. Even from this distance, you can feel the intensity of his stare. Your breath catches in your throat as a jolt of electricity seems to pulse through your bond. Bucky immediately follows Steve's line of sight, his eyes finding you as well. The intensity of their combined focus makes you shiver. Bucky's expression softens. Steve's face is a mask of conflicting and guarded emotions - regret, longing, and a flicker of the man you once knew.
You find yourself unable to look away, caught in the magnetic pull of their gazes. The air feels charged with potential energy, heavy with unspoken words and simmering emotions, like the calm before a storm breaks. Your fingers press against the glass, leaving faint smudges as you unconsciously lean closer.
Bucky gives a slight nod, his eyes never leaving yours. It's an unspoken invitation, a reassurance. You swallow hard, your heart pounding as you step back from the window. Your bare feet carry you swiftly to the door, hesitating only for a moment before you turn the handle.
The cool air hits your skin as you step outside, goosebumps rising along your arms. The grass is soft beneath your feet as you make your way towards them, each step feeling both too fast and agonizingly slow. The bonds within you hum with anticipation, drawing you forward like invisible threads.
As you near, you can sense there is a tentative, almost cautious, tension in the clearing surrounding the two alphas. Bucky's stance is protective, but not aggressive. He reaches out as you approach, his hand warm and steady as it finds yours.
"Omega," Bucky murmurs, his voice rough with emotion.
You naturally step close to him, drawing comfort from his solid presence, but your eyes go to Steve.
The other alpha remains still, looking continually between you and Bucky, his gaze intense but wary. The air between you all feels charged, crackling with tangled emotions and uncertainty.
Bucky squeezes your hand, and his thumb begins to trace soothing circles over the back of it. "We've been talking. Trying to figure some things out."
Steve takes a hesitant step forward, his eyes never leaving yours. "I..." Steve starts, his voice hoarse. He clears his throat and tries again. "I know I can never fully make up for what I've done. To either of you." His gaze flicks between you and Bucky. "But I want you to know that I'm trying to break free. To be myself again."
You feel a tremor run through you, a mix of fear and hope and something you can't quite name. The bond between you and Steve pulses, no longer unyielding, but rather something more malleable, raw and aching.
“I believe you, Steve,” your voice is soft when start speaking, but as you say each word, it grows stronger. “But I also know it. I’ve seen the glimmers of the alpha we knew before all this bleed through.”
You visibly see Steve’s chest swell a little.
Bucky's arm slides around your waist, grounding you. "Steve and I have spent a long time talking. We've agreed that we need to take this slow," he explains. "For all our sakes. But we also can't ignore what's happened. The bonds..."
"It won't be easy," you say, your voice steady despite the storm of emotions inside you. "There's a lot to work through. A lot of hurt."
Steve nods, his eyes filled with a mix of hope and regret. "I know. And I'm prepared to do whatever it takes. For as long as it takes."
You feel a slight vibration run through Bucky, and you squeeze his hand reassuringly. This is difficult for him too, you know. The alphas' friendship has been tested in ways neither could have ever imagined.
"We take it day by day," you say simply. “Even without the dark pieces, something like this is,” you pause, searching for the right word, “unprecedented logistically. There are no records I’ve been able to find of two alphas claiming the same omega.”
“How did you…?” Steve furrows his brow.
You smirk. “When you left your secondary tablet in our quarters, I figured out the password. I knew I couldn’t access any of the external network, make contact with anyone, or conduct any searches that would seem out of the ordinary, but it was safe to scour the internal database. I couldn’t tell you where we were specifically, but it was evident we were at a priority one research and experimentation facility. Their library was flush with theories and documented studies and countless records in regards to alpha, beta, and omega dynamics, mutualism, and biological networks.”
Bucky’s chest rumbled. “Clever girl.”
You couldn’t help but preen a little. “Thank you, Alpha.”
Steve shifted slightly. Together now, there were new dynamics to feel and figure out. Experiencing and exploring it all would be a constant evolution and experiment for the foreseeable future, uncomfortable as it would likely be more often than not.
But there was also a flicker of admiration that crossed Steve’s face. "That's... impressive. And resourceful."
You shrug, trying to downplay the praise even as warmth blooms in your chest. "It was necessary. I needed to understand what was happening to me. To us."
"And what did you find?" Steve asks, his curiosity piqued.
You sigh, running a hand through your hair. "Not much, to be honest. There were a few theoretical papers, some speculation based on rare cases of polyamorous relationships involving alphas and omegas, some based on relationships that involved betas, but nothing concrete. Nothing like our situation. No omegas documented with bonding marks from more than one alpha."
Bucky's arm tightens around you protectively. "We're in uncharted territory here."
You nod, leaning into his touch. "Exactly. Which is why we need to be careful. Patient." Your eyes meet Steve's, holding his gaze steadily. "We need to relearn each other. All of us."
Steve nods. The air between the three of you feels thick with potential, with possibility and uncertainty in equal measure. You can feel the bonds humming, adjusting, seeking equilibrium.
Bucky is the first to break the silence. "We'll figure it out," he says firmly, his voice leaving no room for doubt.
"Maybe," you start hesitantly, "we could start with something simple. Neutral ground."
Bucky tilts his head, curious. "What did you have in mind?”
You shrug. “Can’t get more basic than the three of us going back into that house and cooking and sharing a meal together.”
The suggestion hangs in the air for a moment, its simplicity almost startling in contrast to the complexity of your situation. Then, slowly, Steve nods.
"I'd like that," he says softly, a ghost of a smile tugging at his lips.
Bucky's arm loosens slightly around your waist, his posture relaxing a fraction. "Sounds good to me. Though I hope you both remember I'm mostly still a disaster in the kitchen."
You can't help but chuckle, the sound breaking some of the tension. "At least some things never change. Steve, you still remember how to make that pasta dish? The one with the garlic and olive oil?"
Steve's eyes flare with recognition, a piece of the old Steve muscling through. "Aglio e olio? Yeah, I think I can manage that."
As you turn towards the house, Bucky's hand still in yours, you feel Steve fall into step beside you. The proximity makes your spine tingle, your body hyper-aware of both alphas. The bonds pulse gently, adjusting to this new dynamic.
Inside the small kitchen, you all move cautiously at first, cognizant every second of each other's presence. The space feels too small and too large all at once. You begin gathering ingredients, your movements deliberate as you try to establish a sense of normalcy.
"I'll start on the pasta," Steve offers, his voice low. He moves to the stove, careful not to brush against either you or Bucky as he passes.
Bucky nods, then turns to you. "What can I do? Without burning the place down, preferably."
You can't help but smile at that. "How about you set the table? Plates are in the cabinet over there."
As you all settle into your tasks, a fragile rhythm begins to establish itself. The kitchen fills with the sounds of cooking - water boiling, garlic sizzling, plates clinking. It's pure domesticity, and for a moment, you can almost pretend that everything is normal.
But then Steve reaches past you for the olive oil, and you feel the heat of his body, smell his alpha scent. Your breath catches, and you freeze. Bucky tenses immediately, his eyes darting between you and Steve.
The moment stretches, taut as a bowstring. Steve's hand hovers in the air, caught between reaching for the oil and pulling back. His eyes meet yours, a storm of emotions swirling in their depths. You can feel the pulse of the bond between you, raw and uncertain. He worked you through one of your heats, and that experience was unforgettable and crucial to evolving your dynamic. You slept in the same bed for weeks and weeks now - a platonic but intimate negotiation of proximity each night, trusting in each other to some degree, but the bottom line is that the vast majority of the time has been spent with guards up between you until now. This is new and even though you're optimistic, your veins are laced with uncertainty.
Bucky takes a half-step closer, gauging the dynamics of the situation.
You don’t move, but it also means you don’t shrink or flinch. The tension in the room is palpable, but you're determined not to let it derail this tentative journey.
Steve takes the bottle with a nod, his movements careful and deliberate as he returns to the stove. Bucky remains close, his eyes never leaving you as he resumes setting the table.
As the meal comes together, the tension begins to fade again, replaced by a cautious camaraderie from things you all shared in what seems like a lifetime ago.
You find yourself falling into old patterns, teasing Bucky about his lack of culinary skills and offering suggestions to Steve as he stirs the pasta.
But reality reasserts itself in small ways - the way Steve's hand shakes slightly as he plates the food, the protective stance Bucky takes as he moves around the kitchen, the way your own breath catches when both alphas are near.
As you all sit down to eat, the atmosphere relaxes just a fraction again. You take a bite of the pasta, closing your eyes briefly at the familiar taste.
"It's perfect, Steve," you say softly, offering a small smile. "Just like I remember."
Steve's eyes light up for a moment. "I'm glad I could still make it right."
It’s going to be like this, undulating momentum and regression, but even the surety of that seems to settle your mind in its own way.
The alphas tuck in to their plates as well, and then snippets of conversation begin to flow.
"Remember that time in London when we tried to cook for Peggy?" Bucky says, a hint of amusement in his voice.
Steve chuckles softly, twirling a bite of pasta onto his fork. "How could I forget? Nearly burned down the entire safe house. Neither of us knew how to cook back then."
You feel a smile tugging at your lips, even as a twinge of sadness hits you at the mention of Peggy. "I heard about that. Didn't you two end up ordering fish and chips instead?"
"And swore Peggy to secrecy," Steve adds, a ghost of his old grin appearing.
The easy back-and-forth continues as the alphas plate up more pasta and you reach for more bread.
As you all come to the end of your plates of food, the anecdotes ebb away and a more serious tone settles in.
"We’re going to need ground rules," you say, and they both nod. "But I say we start with this. We cook together, we eat together, we talk while we eat.”
“A good start,” Bucky says at the same time Steve murmurs, “Agreed.”
A small warmth travels through your chest, a modicum of surety.
Steve pushes his plate out of the way and leans forward on the table, his voice low as he speaks. "What else did you find in your research?"
You take a deep breath, organizing your thoughts. "Not much concrete, honestly. There were theories, speculation, but nothing definitive. The closest I could find were some old legends, stories of powerful alphas sharing an omega in times of great need or crisis."
Steve nods slowly, his brow furrowed in thought. "Makes sense. It's not exactly a common occurrence."
Despite all the uncertainty and complications, you can't shake something in your omega instincts that has you just believing that you can count on these two alphas by your side. Back in Brooklyn, the old Steve was the person you had grown to trust and rely on most outside of Bucky, and whoever this version of Steve is evolving into, it’s clear he is resolute in his investment in this future. It wasn’t something that had emerged out of nowhere today. You could look back and trace the threads of it coming together for a long time now.
It’s Bucky who cuts through the silence again. “I have something to share,” he says slowly, but there’s no hint of hesitancy in his words.
You and Steve turn your full attention to him.
“Well, go on, Buck,” the other alpha urges, his tone somewhere between curious, cautious, and suspicious.
Bucky takes a deep breath, his metal fingers tapping a soft rhythm on the table. "Over the last year, before all of this happened, I was already doing some research of my own.”
You lean forward, intrigued. "What kind of research?"
"Pack formations," Bucky says, his voice low and steady. "And how they could theoretically work in our modern world."
Your eyes widen, and you lean forward, intrigued. Steve's brow furrows, but he remains silent, waiting for Bucky to continue.
"It started as curiosity," Bucky explains, his voice low and thoughtful. "I'd been reading about wolf packs, about how they function in the wild. And it got me thinking about our own dynamics as alphas and omegas. How we might be able to form something similar, something more... expansive than traditional pairings."
Bucky pauses, his eyes becoming more intense as he recalls his research. "It started with some old texts I found in Wakanda last year. Stories of warrior tribes, of alphas who shared leadership and omegas who bound packs together. At first, I thought it was just folklore, but the more I dug, the more I found."
You feel a warmth spreading through your chest as Bucky speaks.
"They were rare and hard to find, but I found some fascinating anthropological studies on tribal societies in other parts of the world where multiple alphas and omegas lived together as well. They shared responsibilities, shared child-rearing duties. It was all about balance and mutual support."
The idea is both thrilling and terrifying, but somehow, it feels right, and your mind is already racing with the implications and possibilities.
He pauses, taking a sip of water before continuing. "I reached out to some contacts - anthropologists, historians, even.”
“Why,” Steve suddenly breaks into the flow of what Bucky was saying, “were you looking into pack formations? What possible motivation did you have before… before that night?”
Bucky's eyes lock onto Steve's. The corner of his mouth quirks up in a half-smile, and he shakes his head slightly.
"Really, Steve?" Bucky's voice is gentle, but there's a hint of reproach in his tone. "After all we've been through, you have to ask that?"
Steve's brow furrows, flickers of doubt and confusion crossing his face. Bucky sighs, leaning back in his chair. The wooden legs scrape softly against the floor as he shifts, the sound punctuating the moment.
"You and I," Bucky continues, his voice low and intense, "we've been part of each other's lives since we were kids in Brooklyn. We've shared everything - scraped knees and stolen apples, first crushes and last dances."
His eyes flick to you briefly before returning to Steve. "And then there was the war, and everything that came after. The ice, the fall, decades apart. But even then, even when I didn't know my own name, some part of me knew you. We've always been connected, Steve. Always."
As Bucky speaks, the air in the room seems to thicken with memories. You can almost see them - two young boys laughing in the streets of Brooklyn, two soldiers standing side by side in the midst of the Great War and later the Infinity War.
Steve swallows, and his gaze is locked on Bucky.
“End of the line,” Bucky reminds him. You’ve heard them say that to each other before.
Steve's expression softens as the weight of Bucky's words sinks in. "Buck..." he starts, his voice rough with emotion.
You watch the interplay between them, feeling the bonds pulse with a complex mix of emotions.
Bucky leans forward, his gaze intense. “When everything with the Infinity War was over, when we were both finally free - you from exile and me from the conditioning - and we got to go home to Brooklyn, it did feel like going home, but it was also different. We’d both changed, grown. And then came our omega.” His eyes meet yours, warm and full of love. “Suddenly, it wasn’t just the two of us. It was three, and everything finally felt right for me.”
You feel your breath catch in your throat, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. Bucky reaches out, taking your hand in his. You can’t look away from Bucky in this moment, but you do feel Steve’s eyes on you now, too.
“That’s why I started researching pack dynamics,” Bucky continues. His eyes go back to Steve, his thumb tracing circles on the back of your hand. “I could feel it building, this connection between the three of us. It was more than just friendship, more than just a singular alpha and omega bond. It was… family. Pack.
You feel a warmth spread through your chest at Bucky's words, at the acknowledgment of the bond that had been growing between all of you even before everything changed.
Steve's breath catches audibly. "Buck, I… I didn't know. I never thought…"
Bucky reaches out, his hand resting on Steve's forearm. "I know. And I should have said something sooner. To both of you. But I wanted to understand it better first, to see what the possibilities could be. If we hadn’t ended up like we are now, I felt that you would always fiercely protect us, like I would either of you, and if you’d ever bonded with another omega, it seemed natural that I would have felt about them the way you felt about…”
Bucky falters slightly, unable to finish. He squeezes your hand, and you grip it tightly right back.
You know there will be moments like this where the wound is torn open again, but if the three of you are diligent in working to heal, one day it may only be a scar.
A heavy silence falls over the three of you, the weight of the situation settling on your shoulders. The bonds between you all pulse with a mix of uncertainty and determination.
“So,” you prompt, “I already have two bonds, two alphas, but how would a pack potentially work?”
Bucky takes a deep breath, his eyes flickering between you and Steve. "The most fascinating part of my research was about the bonding of alphas within a pack," he begins, his voice taking on a tone of eagerness. "It's not like the bond between an alpha and an omega. It's deeper, more primal."
He leans forward, an awe glinting in his eyes. "In the ancient texts I found, there were descriptions of a ritual. A blood bond between alphas."
You look at Steve, and your heart leaps because this moment feels like before, when Bucky would launch into an explanation of something he was passionate about, and you and Steve would go on that journey with him because Bucky was fiercely intelligent, and his enthusiasm when he got like this was irresistible. It’s the briefest of exchanges, but it’s like a suture in your heart.
"A blood bond?" Steve asks, prompting Bucky to continue.
Bucky nods, his metal arm gleaming in the soft light of the kitchen. "The alphas would come together under a full moon, usually in a sacred place - a grove, a mountaintop, somewhere with power. They'd bring their pack, their omegas, as witnesses."
As Bucky speaks, you can almost see it - moonlight filtering through ancient trees, the air thick with anticipation and the scent of alpha pheromones.
As he speaks, you can almost see it - the moonlight filtering through the leaves of ancient trees, casting dappled shadows on a forest floor. The scent of earth and night-blooming flowers and alpha pheromones heavy in the air.
"They'd stand in a circle, usually in a place of power - a clearing in an ancient forest, or atop a windswept hill. Each alpha would make a small cut on their palm with a ceremonial blade."
Bucky's voice drops lower, almost hypnotic as he continues, "Each alpha would make a small cut on their palm, then then they would stand in a circle and join hands, mixing their blood. As they did, they'd recite an oath - swearing to protect and provide for the pack, to lead with wisdom and strength, to share in both the triumphs and burdens."
You feel a shiver run down your spine. Steve leans forward, riveted as he listens.
"The texts described it as transformative. They say that as the oath was spoken there under the light of the full moon, a bond would form between the alphas. Not like an alpha-omega bond, but something different. Complementary. It was said to enhance their ability to protect the pack. Some accounts even mentioned shared thoughts or feelings or drawing on each other’s strength in moments of great need.”
"And the omegas?" you breathe, your voice barely above a whisper.
Bucky's eyes meet yours, warm and full of promise. "The omegas were crucial. They were the heart of the pack, the ones who bound it all together. Their presence during the ritual was said to amplify the bond, to make it stronger."
Steve clears his throat, his voice rough with emotion when he speaks. "And you think this could work?”
Bucky's eyes meet Steve's, a fierce determination in their depths. "I think it's worth trying," he says softly. "We're already bonded through our past, and now through our omega. This could complete the circle, so to speak."
Your mind racing with possibilities. The bonds within you pulse with anticipation and a hint of nervousness.
"When?" you ask, your voice barely above a whisper.
Bucky glances out the window, his expression thoughtful. "The next full moon is in about two weeks. That would give us time to prepare, to adjust to this new dynamic."
Steve nods slowly, his gaze moving between you and Bucky. “You want this, Buck. I want this. But do you want this, Omega?” he asks, shifting his whole body to focus on you.
Your heart beats loudly in your chest, your eyes searching his blues, his searching yours just as diligently.
“I gave you no choice in changing your reality as an omega before, I will never do that again,” he says so fiercely it feels more like a solemn vow.
The blood running through your veins heats up, surging through you with a new fire. You don’t speak. You don’t have the words to convey everything running through your heart, your mind, your soul.
You push your chair back from the table and stand, eyes still fixed on Steve, your movements deliberate as you approach him. The air between you crackles with tension and possibility. Bucky watches intently, his body coiled with anticipation.
You stand before Steve, your heart pounding in your chest. His eyes never leave yours as you reach out, cupping his face gently in your hands. You can feel the slight tremor that runs through him at your touch.
"Alpha," you say, the word heavy with meaning.
"Omega," he breathes, his voice thick with emotion.
You lean in, pressing your forehead against his. Steve's breath quickens, his hands coming up to rest lightly on your waist. The bond between you pulses, warm and alive.
Bucky stands, moving to join you. His presence at your back is solid, comforting. You feel his hand on your hip, anchoring you.
You slide your right hand from his cheek slowly down the column of Steve’s throat until your fingers rest over the juncture of his neck and shoulder. You rub gently over his mating gland, and it evokes a rumble from his chest.
“We've been through so much, all of us,” finally finding words that feel true to this moment. “And despite everything, we're still here. Still together. I think this is how it was always meant to be."
Your fingers trace the contours of Steve's neck, feeling the steady thrum of his pulse beneath your touch. Steve's eyes, deep pools of blue, search yours intently, the ever-growing storm of emotions swirling within them - hope, fear, longing, and something deeper, primal.
You can feel the bond between you and Bucky pulsing with encouragement and love, supporting you in this moment.
Time seems to slow as you lean in closer to Steve, your breath mingling with his. You nose down his neck, and he groans when you scent him. The smell of him is a mix of leather, pine, and something uniquely alpha – and all of it familiar. It fills your senses, making your head spin. Your omega instincts finally surge forward, finally feeling the safety you needed, recognizing your alpha, yearning to complete the bond that has been forming between you.
Steve's hands tighten on your waist, his fingers pressing into your skin through the thin fabric of your shirt. You can feel the slight tremor in his touch, a mix of trepidation and longing.
You can see the pulse beneath his skin, feel the heat radiating from the spot. You lock eyes with Steve again, asking the silent question. The moment stretches, taut as a bowstring.
Steve tilts his head to the side, offering his neck to you.
Your heart races at the gesture of trust and submission, more surety that he’s relinquishing the dark part that had taken over him. You brush your lips against his skin, feeling the rapid pulse beneath. Steve's breath hitches, and his hands tighten on your waist. Your tongue darts out, and you taste the salt of his skin.
"Omega," Steve implores. His scent intensifies, filling the air with pheromones that make your head spin.
Finally, your teeth sink into his flesh, claiming him. The taste of his blood floods your mouth, rich and coppery. Steve’s connection to you - that wall which had been only slowly thawing - suddenly melts away as you bonding yourself to him opens your soul to him. When he’d taken you by force, it had been a physical bond that you couldn’t deny. But an Omega claiming an Alpha in return? It wasn’t unheard of, but it was a ritual that signified a mutual decision of acknowledging only the deepest, purest connections, true partnership between Alpha and Omega.
A deep, guttural groan escapes his throat, reverberating through your body. As you release your bite, you lick the wound gently, soothing it. Steve wraps an arm around you, pulling you flush against his body, and you settle yourself into his lap.
Bucky's hands squeeze your hips, continuing to ground you as you're swept up in the intensity of the moment, but there’s also something primal you sense in the pressure now. You can feel his approval through your existing bond, supporting you as you form this new connection with Steve, but there’s another element there, too. It feels like hunger.
Steve's eyes meet yours, dark with desire. His other hand cups your cheek, thumb brushing over your lower lip. The air between you is electric, charged with anticipation. Slowly, he leans in, his lips meeting yours in a tender kiss. It's soft at first, almost hesitant, but quickly deepens as you respond eagerly.
Your fingers thread through his hair, pulling him closer as the kiss intensifies. His tongue traces the seam of your lips, seeking entry, and you grant it willingly. The taste of him is intoxicating, familiar yet new all at once. A soft moan escapes you as his hands roam your body, igniting sparks wherever they touch. You can feel the evidence of his arousal pressing at your core, your clothing separating your sex from his. The kiss deepens, becoming more passionate as you both give in to the intensity of the moment.
Suddenly, you feel Bucky's presence behind you more acutely. His chest presses against your back, his breath hot on your neck. "Omega," he growls, his voice low and husky with desire.
You break the kiss with Steve, turning your head to look at Bucky over your shoulder. His eyes are dark with lust, his pupils blown wide. Without hesitation, you reach for him, pulling him into a fierce kiss. Steve's hands continue to roam your body as you kiss Bucky, creating a sensory overload that has you moaning into Bucky's mouth.
“Let’s take her to bed, Buck,” Steve’s words are less of a suggestion and more of a command.
You break the intense kiss with Bucky, turning to face Steve. His eyes are filled with a primal hunger, his alpha instincts taking over. Without a word, he stands up from the chair, pulling you up with him.
Bucky falls into step with the other alpha, and they’re across the small cottage with you next to the bed in seconds.
Steve’s hands, Bucky’s hands, your hands - all three sets work to tug and strip of shirts and pants and undergarments - frenzied yet efficient, until you’re all three naked. Their touch is electrifying and immediately roaming your bare skin, igniting sparks wherever they go. The air is filled with heavy breathing and low growls as they begin to worship every inch of your body.
Steve picks you up effortlessly and lays you down on the bed before climbing on top of you. His mouth seeks out one of your breasts while his hand fondles the other one.
Bucky kneels beside the bed and takes one of your legs in his hand. He trails kisses up from your ankle all the way up to your thigh before finally reaching his destination - your core.
His tongue flicks out teasingly at first before delving deeper into your folds. You gasp at the sensation, arching into his mouth. The combination of their touches has you already on edge, but it's not long before Bucky's expert tongue brings you over that edge.
You cry out, one hand fisting the sheets and the other tangling in Steve’s hair as you come undone.
As you come down from your first orgasm, both alphas shift their positions. Steve moves up to capture your lips in a searing kiss, while Bucky replaces him at your breasts, lavishing them with attention.
Your body hums with pleasure, every nerve ending alive and tingling. You can feel the heat of their arousal pressing against you, their hard cocks at either hip, their scents mingling in the air - a heady, almost overwhelming combination.
"Alpha," you moan, not sure which one you're addressing, or if you mean both. Your hands roam over their muscled bodies, tracing scars and planes of hard muscle.
Steve breaks the kiss, his eyes dark with desire. "Tell us what you want, omega," he growls, his voice low and commanding.
You whimper, overwhelmed by sensation and need. "I want... I want both of you," you manage to gasp.
“You have us, ‘mega,” Bucky assures you, murmuring the promise against your skin with the kisses and licks to your breasts, his vibranium hand squeezing the soft flesh of your inner thigh.
Steve shifts his position, moving between your legs. His eyes lock with yours, seeking permission. You nod, breath catching in anticipation. He enters you slowly, letting you adjust to his size. The stretch is exquisite, filling you completely. A low moan escapes your lips as he begins to move, setting a steady rhythm.
As Steve continues his slow, deep thrusts, Bucky moves up the bed, positioning himself near your head. His cock stands proud, hard and glistening with precum. You lick your lips in anticipation, your eyes meeting his with a look of hunger.
Bucky's metal hand cups the back of your head, cool against your heated skin, guiding you gently towards his length. You part your lips, taking him into your mouth with a moan of pleasure. The taste of him explodes on your tongue - salty, musky, and uniquely him.
You swirl your tongue around the head of his cock before taking him deeper, hollowing your cheeks as you suck.
Bucky's metal hand applies gentle pressure on the back of your head, not pushing, but guiding. As you relax your throat to take him deeper as he nudges more and more insistently, he places his flesh hand over your neck, feeling himself fill you with his length.
"Fuck, Omega," he growls, his voice rough with pleasure. "Your mouth feels too good."
You moan around him, the vibrations making him shudder. Neither of your alpha super soldiers are in any kind of hurry. Their actions are deliberate, but it’s clear the only thing they both want in this moment is to be inside of you.
Your body is alive with sensation, caught between the two alphas as they pleasure you. Steve's thrusts grow more intense, his hips snapping against yours with increased fervor. Fervor but not speed, and each thrust pushes you further onto Bucky's cock, creating a rhythm that has you moaning around him.
Steve's hands grip your hips tightly, sure to leave bruises, as he drives into you, and you want it.
"So tight, Omega," he groans against your sternum, his voice strained with pleasure. "You feel so good around me."
Bucky's metal hand threads through your hair, guiding your movements as you take him deeper into your throat. His flesh hand remains on your neck, feeling the bulge of his cock as it slides in and out. The dual sensations of being filled at both ends has you trembling with pleasure.
"That's it," Bucky encourages, his voice husky. "Take us, sweetheart.”
The praise sends a shiver down your spine, your inner omega preening at the approval of your alphas.
Both of them.
Yours.
The thought makes you whimper.
"Ready for my cum, Omega?" Bucky pants, his voice strained with pleasure.
You feel the first pulses as he throbs in your mouth, and you moan, blinking up at him, eyes watering but encouraging him to spill inside you.
"Fuck, you're perfect," he swears, and then his hips stutter and he groans as he begins to spill his release down your throat.
Your omega purrs in contentment as you swallow some of his seed, relishing in the taste of him. But before he finishes, Bucky pulls out of your mouth and pushes at Steve's shoulders to move quickly.
Steve understands immediately and pushes up with one hand, his other still gripping your hip. Then Bucky is fisting his cock, shooting the rest of his spend over your breasts, your chest heaving as your lungs greedily gulp in oxygen.
Bucky leans over you, his metal hand cupping your face as he kisses you deeply. You open your mouth to him eagerly, tongues tangling. His other hand moves to your breasts to rub the sticky mess of his cum over your tender flesh. He moans in what you can feel through the bond is satisfaction at the taste of himself on your lips and the primal marking of your chest. You indulge in the kiss you’re in desperate need for air, and push gently against him. He presses a kiss to your cheek, then pulls away and kneels above you to watch.
"You look so good taking his cock," Bucky remarks as Steve continues to thrust into you with precision.
Your pussy clenches at his words, and Steve groans in response.
“You should let her ride you, Steve,” Bucky continues. “She’s a glorious sight like that.”
Your heart stutters, and you look up at Bucky, only somewhat incredulously. And that satisfied curve of his lips, so familiar, makes your stomach rush with butterflies, and you chirp for him.
“Oh, that’s a sweet sound,” Steve exclaims in a rush, and before you can think another thought, another chirp bubbles up out of your chest, and you’re tumbling as in one fluid motion Steve flips your positions so he’s on his back and you’re above him, still impaled on his cock.
You suck in a breath at the feel of the new position. It causes his cock to hit new angles inside you. Your hands brace against his chest as you adjust, feeling the solid muscle beneath your palms. Steve's hands grip your hips, guiding you as you start to move.
Bucky is already languidly fisting his cock as he watches you, half-hard again, your ever-insatiable alpha with next to no refractory period due to the serum that enhanced his body in every way.
And now you have two of them.
You begin to roll your hips, finding a rhythm that has you both moaning. The new position allows you to control the depth and speed, and you revel in the power it gives you. Steve's eyes are dark with lust as he watches you move above him, his gaze roaming over your body.
Bucky moves behind you, his hands sliding up your back. You feel his lips on your shoulder, then your neck, kissing and nipping at the sensitive skin. He presses his chest against your back as his hands come up to cup your breasts. He kneads the soft flesh, rolling your nipples between his fingers. The dual stimulation has you moaning, your movements becoming more urgent.
You lean back against Bucky's chest, your head falling onto his shoulder as you continue to ride Steve. The new angle allows Steve to thrust up into you deeper, hitting that spot inside you that makes you forget anything else on the face of the earth, and still it seems he’s in no rush to get to his release.
Bucky turns your head, demanding your lips for more kisses again, and you mold your lips to his. He strokes your tongue with his tongue, mimicking the way he had had his mouth on your other lips earlier. He’s always eager to kiss you until you can’t breathe, driving you to that light-headed pleasure once more.
You’re panting, your entire body trembling with need as Bucky breaks off the kiss and presses a hand to the small of your back, urging you forward. You know what he wants, and you readily comply, lowering yourself down onto Steve’s chest.
Bucky moves behind you, his hands spreading the round cheeks of your ass to expose your tightest hole. He presses the head of his cock against the puckered ring of muscle, eliciting a gasp from you as he starts to slowly push inside. He’s taken you like this before, but never with another cock in your cunt at the same time. You feel stretched in the most delicious, almost impossible ways. Bucky slowly fills you up, his cock sliding deeper and deeper into you until he is buried to the hilt. He stays still for a moment, allowing you to adjust to his size before starting to move.
He sets a slow pace at first, sliding in and out of you with long strokes that have you moaning between them. You can feel every inch of him rubbing against sensitive nerve endings inside you, driving your arousal higher and higher.
Steve had stilled his movements, in awe and happy to pause in order to watch with increasing lust and need in his eyes. Once he sees Bucky has settled into a rhythm, Steve adjusts to work in tandem with him, thrusting up into you again.
You can feel every inch of them inside you. Bucky picks up speed, but Steve maintains his earlier slow pace. Wanting him to let go, you set your mouth to the fresh bonding mark you gave him and suck insistently. He growls, and you get exactly what you want, as his hips snap faster and harder, both men pounding into you with a rhythm that has become almost primal.
"Alpha... alph-ah!" You cry out their names incoherently as the orgasm hits with full force. Your release crashes over you like a wave, making your body tremble with its intensity. But before it can fully ebb away, Bucky's hand slips between your bodies and finds your clit, rubbing it in tight circles that send another wave of pleasure through you. Your vision goes white as wave after wave of pleasure washes over you, your back arching as your muscles simultaneously strain and revel in the ecstasy.
Steve follows soon after, giving one final thrust before he's filling you with his hot release. Bucky is right behind him, and fills you with another load.
As you catch your breath, Steve pulls out of you and lays back on the bed, spent. Bucky, still inside you, leans down to kiss your neck as he slowly pulls out as well. You shift so you’re only draped over half of Steve, pressed into his side, one leg bent up over his hip, and Bucky presses up behind you. You feel them drip out of you between your thighs, the mess trickling over Steve’s thigh and down onto the sheets, but no one seems to mind or care.
After a few minutes of basking in the afterglow, Steve sits up and looks between the two of you. “We should get cleaned up.”
You nod in agreement and Bucky chuckles before getting up as well. The three of you head to the bathroom together, sharing kisses and some heated touches as you clean each other off under the warm spray of a quick shower.
The alphas change the sheets while you towel your hair dry and brush your teeth.
You collapse onto the fresh linens, feeling utterly spent but deeply satisfied. Your body hums with residual pleasure as you settle into the middle of the bed. Both men come to join you on either side of the mattress, but before Steve can, you turn to him and put your arm out over the spot he is about to occupy.
“Wait!”
Steve tilts his head, a small frown taking over his face.
“Will you open the window?”
He arches an eyebrow.
“Please?” you give him the softest, most pleading eyes that you can.
He shakes his head, but then smiles and strides away to go open the front window, moving quickly to satisfy your request. Your chest warms, and you realize it’s not Steve’s willingness to do something you ask - he’s been a much more dutiful companion since you two escaped from Hydra - but it’s because it’s the first time you have seen him genuinely smile since all of you were back home in Brooklyn.
What’s more, as Steve returns to the bed and slides in next to you, your mind considers that this is the first night you will have shared the bed with Steve. You had slept on the same mattress for weeks - at first with you refusing to even get under the covers - but even last night, it was still a functional practice. Tonight, you want to feel his presence close by, the intimate sharing of a space while you’re both vulnerable in sleep, and you want it with him as much as you want it from Bucky.
Today transformed everything, and for the first time in months, you feel unquestionably safe.
You curl into his side, resting your head on his chest, and Bucky presses up against your back. His metal arm drapes over your waist, cool against your bare skin. He presses a kiss to your shoulder, and Steve trails his fingers back and forth in soothing patterns over your arm. The bonds between you and your alphas pulse with contentment.
You lie there in comfortable silence for a while, basking in the afterglow and the warmth of your alphas. Moonlight filters through the gauzy curtains, casting ethereal shadows that dance and sway with each gentle breeze. The antique clock on the dresser ticks steadily, marking the late hour.
The cool night air drifts in through the open window, carrying with it the scent of pine, earth, and wildflowers, and being held so warmly between your two alphas, you nearly drop off to sleep, when they start talking.
It’s Steve who speaks first, his voice tinged with a hint of uncertainty. "Do you really think this pack bond will work?"
You feel Bucky shift behind you, propping himself up on one elbow to look at Steve over your shoulder. "I do," he says firmly. "We've always been stronger together, Steve. This just makes it official."
You trace lazy patterns on Steve's chest as you consider their words.
"He's right," you murmur, your voice soft but sure. "We've always been meant for this, I think. Even before... everything." You pause, gathering your thoughts. "Back in Brooklyn, it always felt like we were more together. Something bigger than just friendship or traditional bonds."
Steve's hand finds yours on his chest, intertwining your fingers. "I felt it that, too," he admits quietly.
“Family,” you hum.
“A pack.”
"In the morning, we should start planning for the ritual," Bucky murmurs, his voice a low rumble against your back.
You nod sleepily, your eyes already heavy. "Mmm, good idea," you mumble.
Steve's chest rises and falls with a deep breath. "We'll need to find the right location," he says thoughtfully. "Somewhere with meaning for all of us."
Bucky hums in agreement. "And we'll need to gather the necessary items. The ceremonial blade, for one."
You're drifting off, lulled by their voices and the warmth of their bodies, but you manage to add, "Don't forget the full moon. Two weeks..."
Your words trail off as sleep claims you, nestled safely between your alphas. The last thing you're aware of is Steve pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead and Bucky explaining some of the beliefs about the energy of a full moon and the significance of this coming full moon in particular.
Exhausted but also content for the first time in months, you sleep all the way through the night.
The sun is just beginning to peek over the horizon when you stir, consciousness slowly returning. You're enveloped in warmth, cocooned between two solid bodies. For a moment, you keep your eyes closed, savoring the peaceful feeling.
Bucky's metal arm is still draped over your waist, his chest pressed against your back. You can feel the steady rise and fall of his breathing, indicating he's still asleep. On your other side, Steve's hand rests on your hip, his body curled protectively around you. Their scents mingle in the air around you, a comforting cocoon of alpha pheromones that makes your omega purr with contentment.
You blink your eyes open, adjusting to the soft morning light filtering through the curtains. The room is bathed in a golden glow, giving everything an almost dreamlike quality. For a brief moment, you wonder if this is all a dream - if you'll wake up back in a cold Hydra facility.
But then Steve shifts beside you, his hand tightening on your hip. His blue eyes flutter open, immediately finding yours. A soft smile curves his lips as he takes you in.
"Good morning, Omega," he murmurs, his voice rough with sleep.
The sound sends a shiver down your spine. You return his smile, feeling a warmth bloom in your chest. "Good morning, Alpha.
As you and Steve exchange soft morning greetings, a gentle "meow" breaks the quiet. Your eyes widen in delight, and Steve's head turns towards the sound. There, at the foot of the bed on Steve's side, a graceful white cat has just leapt up and landed with the lightest of touches. Her fur is pristine, almost glowing in the golden morning light filtering through the curtains.
The cat's sapphire blue eyes blink slowly at you both, her tail swishing gently behind her.
“Hi, sweet girl,” you coo at the feline who has been coming around the cottage more and more often the past few days. You stretch your arm out and beckon her to come closer, meowing at her.
She stretches languidly, arching her back and extending her paws, before padding softly up the bed. Her movements are deliberate and elegant, each step barely making an impression on the blankets.
The cat pauses near Steve's hip, tilting its head as if assessing the situation. Its whiskers twitch slightly, picking up the subtle changes in the air currents caused by your breathing. Then, with a soft chirp, she steps up onto Steve’s hip, and then she settles in the small space between you and Steve. You brgin to lavish her with head scratches and soft pets. Her purrs vibrate against your chest. Steve watches with a mix of amusement and wonder, his hand coming up to gently stroke her silky fur.
"I didn't know we were expecting a visitor," he murmurs, his voice still husky from sleep.
You smile, continuing to scratch behind the cat's ears. "She's been coming around more often lately. You’re usually up and out for a run when she drops in for her morning visit. I think she likes us."
The cat's purrs intensify as she receives attention from both of you. Her sapphire eyes close in contentment, her paws kneading gently against the blankets.
Behind you, Bucky stirs, his arm tightening around your waist as he nuzzles into your neck. "Mmm, too early for talking," he mumbles sleepily.
You chuckle softly at Bucky's sleepy grumbling. "We have a visitor, Buck," you say, your voice warm with amusement.
Bucky grunts and props himself up on one elbow, peering over your shoulder. His eyes widen slightly as he takes in the sight of the white cat nestled between you and Steve.
"Well, hello there," he says, his voice still rough with sleep. The cat opens one eye to regard him before closing it again, clearly unimpressed by the interruption to her petting session.
Bucky reaches over you to gently scratch under the cat's chin. She leans into his touch, ready to indulge more attention, her purrs intensifying. "Friendly little thing, aren't you?" he murmurs.
Steve laughs softly. "This,” he explains to Bucky, “is why our omega wanted a window left open overnight. Had to make sure our familiar intruder could come in. I think she's made herself quite at home.”
You nod, continuing to stroke the cat's soft fur. "She has. I've been thinking we should keep her.”
The cat stretches lazily, rolling onto her back to expose her fluffy white belly. Her paws knead the air as she basks in the attention from all three of you.
"Keep her?" Bucky asks, his voice soft.
You nod, a hopeful smile on your face. "If you both agree, of course. She seems to have chosen us already."
Steve's hand stills on the cat's fur as he considers. His eyes meet yours, then Bucky's, before returning to the contented feline between you. "It would be nice to have a pet," he muses. "Something normal, after everything."
Bucky hums in agreement. "Plus, cats are good for stress relief. And lord knows we could all use some of that."
The cat chooses that moment to roll back over and stretch, her paws reaching out to knead gently against the duvet. Her sapphire eyes blink slowly at Steve, as if sealing her approval of this arrangement.
Steve chuckles, running his hand along her sleek back. "I think that settles it. She's stays with us."
You beam, your heart swelling with happiness. "She needs a name," you say, scratching behind her ears.
Bucky props himself up on his elbow, his metal arm still draped over your waist. "How about Alpine?" he suggests.
The name feels right, and you nod. "Alpine. I love it."
Alpine purrs contentedly, seeming to approve of her new name. She stretches again, her white fur gleaming in the morning light, before curling up in a tight ball between you and Steve.
"I think she's made herself right at home," Steve says with a soft chuckle, his hand gently stroking Alpine's back.
You smile, feeling a warmth spread through your chest at the domestic scene. It's such a stark contrast to where you were just weeks ago - trapped in a Hydra facility, uncertain of your future. Now, here you are, nestled between your two alphas, with a cat curled up beside you. It feels like a dream.
The room falls into a comfortable silence, broken only by Alpine's soft purrs and the gentle rustling of leaves outside the open window. The morning light grows stronger, casting a warm glow across the bed.
Bucky nuzzles into your neck, his stubble tickling your skin. "Breakfast?" he murmurs, his voice still husky with sleep.
“I thought I might go for a run first,” Steve says.
“You should,” you respond.
“I know we said meals together, but–”
You smile softly at Steve. "We'll wait for you to get back," you reassure him. "It's going to be important for all of us to have routines."
Steve's eyes soften with gratitude. He leans over, careful not to disturb Alpine, and presses a gentle kiss to your forehead. "I won’t be long," he murmurs against your skin.
With careful movements, Steve extricates himself from the bed. Alpine mewls in protest at the disturbance but quickly settles back down, curling into the warm spot Steve left behind.
You curl back into Bucky's warmth. His metal arm tightens around your waist, pulling you flush against his chest. You can feel the steady thrum of his heartbeat against your back.
"How are you feeling?" Bucky murmurs into your hair, his voice low and intimate.
You take a moment to consider Bucky's question, assessing your body and emotions. "I feel... good," you say softly, a hint of surprise in your voice. "For the first time in weeks, I feel safe. Whole again."
Bucky hums in approval, his metal fingers tracing lazy patterns on your hip. "I'm so glad, sweetheart."
You turn in his arms and snuggle closer to him, burying your face in the crook of his neck and inhaling his comforting scent. Alpine stretches and repositions herself against your back, her purrs a soothing vibration against your skin.
“I haven’t forgotten everything that has happened,” you explain, “but I don’t want to hold onto all of that forever. I think we have solid ground between all three of us to move forward.”
Bucky squeezes you tightly. “I think so, too.”
You pull your head back so you can see his face, your eyes searching his. "What about you, Buck? How are you feeling about all of this?"
His blue eyes are soft as they meet yours. "Honestly? I feel like a person again. I shut everything off until I finally saw your face yesterday."
You reach up to cup his cheek, your thumb brushing over his stubble. “We both needed each other.”
“Are you upset I didn’t say anything about the pack to you before?”
You only pause for a moment, looking for the right words. “No, before the incident, you were still researching. Yesterday, I think you wanted to assess the situation with Steve before you put it out there for either of us to consider.”
He smiles. “Always my smart omega.”
You chirp, and he kisses you.
The movement shifts Alpine again, but this, apparently, is the last she’s willing to suffer a disturbance, and she saunters away and hops up into a nearby windowsill where she settles into a loaf so she can soak up all the direct morning sunlight uninterrupted.
“I know I’m only going on gut instinct with Steve, but with my eyes wide open, I don’t feel like I’m wrong.”
You trace your fingers over his forehead, soothing his furrowed brow. “I think you can trust your gut. There’s something I didn’t tell you yesterday when it was still just us.”
“Oh?”
“I think I was waiting to see how you two would handle each other. But I found something…”
You slip out of his arms and roll out of the sheets. When your feet his the floor, you duck down next to the bed, lift the mattress slightly, and reach between the mattress and the boxspring, sliding your hand in until your fingers find and latch onto what you’re looking for. You stand back up and show Bucky.
“Why was there a pillowcase wedged under the mattress?” he asks.
You toss it to him, and he catches it easily. “Smell it.”
He cautiously takes a whiff, and then his head snaps back to you. “This is-”
“Yep.”
He takes a longer inhale of the soft fabric.
“It’s your pillowcase, Buck. He was regularly going on missions while we were at the first Hydra facility - not significantly long ones, usually only a day, once there was a two-day absence, but he was gone when you broke into the facility and they evacuated me away. He knew my heat was coming up. He went to our home in Brooklyn, and he brought something back that smelled like you, something small and innocuous that he could hide both from me and from Hydra. I didn’t realize it was there at first. Everything happened so quickly and I was in a pre-heat mess, then in heat. But once we were here and settled, I realized that as impossible as it should have been, there was a trace of your scent here. I found it while he was on one of his morning runs. He went to considerable trouble to go and bring me something that smelled like you.”
Bucky's eyes widen as he processes what you're telling him. He brings the pillowcase to his nose again, inhaling deeply. His scent mingles with the faint traces of yours and Steve's, creating a complex blend that speaks of home and pack.
"He did that. For you." Bucky's voice is soft, tinged with a mix of wonder and something like resolve.
You nod, settling back onto the bed beside him. "I think a part of him was fighting against the conditioning even then. He knew how much I needed you, how much having your scent nearby would comfort me. He was an alpha taking care of his omega."
Bucky is quiet for a moment, his fingers tracing the edges of the pillowcase. When he speaks again, his voice is thick with emotion. "That's our Steve. The one we knew before all this. He's still in there."
You crawl back up on the bed and lean against his chest, his arm coming around to hold you close. The weight of his metal arm is comforting, grounding. You both sit in contemplative silence for a few moments, the only sound in the room Alpine's soft purrs from her sunny perch.
"I refused to acknowledge it at first," you say softly. "But as the weeks wore on, there were little chips in the armor - his and mine - and I could see the small shifts. The Steve we knew is still there. He's fighting his way back to us."
Bucky presses a kiss to the top of your head. "And we'll be here to help him every step of the way."
You nod, feeling a renewed sense of hope blooming in your chest. The morning light continues to strengthen, filling the room with a warm glow. You can hear birds chirping outside, the world coming alive with the new day. It feels like a metaphor for your own situation - emerging from a long, dark night into the promise of sunlight and warmth again.
You and Bucky remain cuddled together in comfortable silence for a while, lost in your own thoughts. The morning light grows stronger, casting long shadows across the room. Alpine stretches lazily in her sunny spot on the windowsill, her white fur appears almost ethereal as she basks in the warmth.
The scent of dew-kissed grass and blooming flowers drifts in through the open window, carried on a gentle breeze that rustles the curtains. You can hear the distant calls of birds greeting the day, their songs a melodic backdrop to the peaceful morning.
As you lie there, your mind wanders to Steve, out on his morning run. You picture him jogging along the winding forest paths and country roads, his powerful strides eating up the miles. He’s been gone for almost an hour, and you know he should be returning soon based on the previous days as you’ve been in this cottage together.
“I think I want to go meet Steve on his way back and go for a walk with him. Do you mind?”
Bucky presses a kiss to your cheek. "Of course not, sweetheart. Go ahead. I'll start on breakfast for when you two get back. Nothing complicated," he says with a wink.
You smile gratefully, giving him a quick peck on the lips before sliding out of bed. As you dress in comfortable clothes suitable for a morning walk, you can hear Bucky moving around behind you, the soft rustling of sheets as he gets up.
As you're lacing up your shoes, Alpine hops down from her perch and winds herself around your ankles, meowing softly.
"Sorry, sweet girl," you coo, reaching down to scratch behind her ears. "You stay here with Bucky. I'll be back soon."
You give Bucky one last smile before heading out the door. The morning air is crisp and invigorating as you step outside, filled with the scents of pine, the aspen trees, and wildflowers that you have grown fond of here over the last week. Dew clings to the grass, sparkling in the early sunlight. You take a deep breath, filling your lungs with the fresh, clean scent, and step off the porch.
The forest around you is alive with the sounds of birds and small animals going about their morning routines. Sunlight filters through the canopy of leaves overhead, dappling the path before you with patches of golden light.
As you walk, you let your mind wander, reflecting on the events of the past few weeks. So much has changed in such a short time - and even more in the last twenty-four hours. You've gone from being a captive, wounded and betrayed, uncertain of your future, to being here in this peaceful place with both of your alphas. The thought brings a warmth to your chest.
You've been walking for about ten minutes when you catch Steve's scent on the breeze. Your heart quickens a little in anticipation. A moment later, you hear the steady rhythm of his footfalls approaching. As he rounds a bend in the path, his eyes lock onto yours and a slightly hesitant smile spreads across his face.
"Good morning," he says as he slows to a stop in front of you. He's slightly out of breath, a light sheen of sweat glistening on his skin. "This is a welcome surprise."
“I wanted to talk, just us.”
Steve's smile softens, a mix of gratitude and nervousness flickering across his features. "Of course," he says, gesturing to the path ahead. "Shall we?"
You nod, falling into step beside him as you continue down the winding forest trail. For a few moments, you walk in companionable silence, the only sounds the crunch of gravel beneath your feet and the melodic chirping of birds overhead.
"How was your run?" you ask, breaking the quiet.
"Good," Steve replies. "Helps clear my head." He pauses, then adds softly, "Gives me time to think about... everything."
You nod, understanding. "There's a lot to process."
Steve hums in agreement. "I keep expecting to wake up and find this has all been a dream. Or a nightmare, and that I'm back... there." His voice trails off. “Or that I’m back in Brooklyn and none of this had happened. But it has.”
Steve's fingers tentatively reach out to intertwine with yours, his grip firm but gentle. "I know I have a lot to make up for," he says softly, his eyes fixed on the path ahead. "I hurt you both so much."
"Steve," you say, tugging on his hand to make him stop and look at you.
He meets your gaze, his blue eyes filled with a mix of emotions - guilt, hope, and something deeper that makes your heart skip a beat.
"We've all been through hell," you continue. "What happened wasn't your fault. You were being controlled, manipulated. Yes we were hurt, even devastated. But the fact that you fought against it, that you're fighting your way back to us? That’s all I care about now, and I know Bucky feels the same.”
His blue eyes search yours, vulnerability clear in his gaze. "How can you forgive me so easily?"
"Because I know you, Steve Rogers.” Your bring your free hand up to cup his cheek. “I know your heart.”
Steve leans into your touch, his eyes closing briefly as he savors the contact. When he opens them again, they're shining with unshed tears.
"I don't deserve you," he whispers. "Either of you."
You shake your head. "That's not for you to decide. We choose you, Steve. We want you."
He takes a shaky breath, his hand coming up to cover yours on his cheek. "I want to be worthy of that choice."
"You already are," you assure him. "But I know it'll take time for you to believe that."
Steve nods, a look of determination settling over his features. "I'll spend every day trying to make it up to you both. To be the alpha you deserve."
"Just be you, Steve,” you whisper. You lean in and press a soft kiss to his cheek.
“I feel like the weight of all this will never truly go away,” he confesses.
“The work of healing is hard, but you won’t do it alone.”
He groans your name, and you can feel the guilt masking as irritation.
“And I think we should get help,” you press. “And I think we should go back to Wakanda to get it.”
Steve turns away and starts pacing. You watch him for a moment, his agitation clear in the tense set of his shoulders. You know this suggestion isn't easy for him to hear, but you also know it's necessary.
"Alpha," you say gently, stepping into his path to halt his pacing. "Look at me, please."
It’s not like an alpha command, but you know the unique power an omega can invoke for an alpha to listen to their request.
"Wakanda?" Steve asks, his voice tinged with surprise and a hint of wariness. He stops pacing and turns back to face you. The turmoil in his eyes is evident. "Why Wakanda specifically?"
You take a deep breath, choosing your words carefully. "They have the most advanced technology and medical expertise in the world. If anyone can help us navigate the aftermath of what Hydra did, it's them. Plus," you add softly, "they've helped Bucky before. They understand the complexities of deprogramming and healing from that kind of trauma."
Steve's brow furrows as he considers your words. You can see the conflict playing out across his face - the desire to heal warring with his ingrained instinct to protect and isolate.
"I understand why you're suggesting this," Steve says slowly, his eyes meeting yours. "But I'm not sure I'm ready to face… everyone. To be around other people."
You step closer to him, placing a gentle hand on his arm. "We wouldn't have to see anyone we don't want to. Wakanda is a big place, and I'm sure T'Challa would respect our privacy. We could stay somewhere secluded, just the three of us, and only interact with the medical staff when necessary."
Steve's shoulders relax slightly at your words, but you can still see the tension in his jaw. "What about Bucky? Have you discussed this with him?"
You shake your head. "Not yet. I wanted to talk to you first. But I think he’ll agree it's a good idea. He knows better than anyone how helpful Wakanda can be for recovery."
Steve takes a deep breath and nods, processing for another moment.
"You're right," he says finally, his voice soft but resolute. "We can't – I can't do this alone. And Wakanda does have resources we couldn't find anywhere else."
You reach out and take his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. "And a deep kinship you and Bucky established. That matters."
He nods, a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "It does," he agrees, squeezing your hand in return.
"There's something else I wanted to talk to you about," you say, your voice soft but steady.
Steve's brow furrows slightly, a mix of curiosity and concern crossing his features. "What is it?" he asks gently.
You take a deep breath, steeling yourself. "I found the pillowcase," you say softly, watching his face carefully for his reaction.
Steve's eyes widen in recognition, a faint blush creeping up his neck. "Oh," he breathes, his gaze dropping to the ground. "I wasn't sure if you'd noticed."
You step closer to him, your hand coming up to rest on his chest. "Why did you do it, Steve?"
He's quiet for a moment, his eyes fixed on a point in the distance. When he speaks, his voice is barely above a whisper. "Because even when I couldn't remember who I was, who you were to me... I knew I had to take care of my omega, and I knew you needed him."
“That, the clothes, the books, forcing me to accept my heat naturally so I didn’t experience a dry heat, mounting our risky but well-calculated escape… I think it speaks to more than being my alpha. You did them because you’re still you. I think it’s time for you to start believing that, too.”
His hand comes up to cover yours on his chest, his thumb brushing over your knuckles. "I want to believe that," he says softly. "But sometimes it feels like I'm still fighting against the programming, like I could slip back at any moment."
You shake your head, your free hand coming up to cup his cheek. "You won't," you say with conviction. "You're stronger than that, Steve. And we won’t let you get lost. I think it’s another thing becoming a pack will help."
Steve leans into your touch, his eyes closing briefly as he savors the contact. When he opens them again, there's a new resolve in his gaze.
"You're right," Steve says, his voice growing stronger. "We're stronger together. And if becoming a pack will help us all heal and move forward, then that's what we need to do."
You smile up at him, feeling a warmth bloom in your chest at his words. "I'm glad you feel that way. I think it's the right step for all of us."
He nods, pulling you into a tight embrace. You melt into his arms, breathing in his comforting scent. For a moment, you just stand there, holding each other in the quiet of the forest.
You tilt your head back to look up at Steve, taking in the strong line of his jaw, the curve of his lips, the intensity in his blue eyes. The sunlight catches in his hair, turning it to spun gold. Your heart quickens as his gaze drops to your lips, his pupils dilating slightly.
Before he claimed you as Captain Hydra, the Steve before - the Steve you knew in Brooklyn - had grown to be one of your closest friends. Next to Bucky, he was the person you trusted the most. There had been such a safety with him. There had never been a romantic twist or temptation, just a steadfast bond that formed.
But now, now that he's not the terrifying alpha who forcefully bonded you, but now that he's becoming Steve again and is your alpha? Your heart is starting to beat for him now, too.
Time seems to slow as Steve leans in, his hand coming up to cup your cheek. His touch is gentle, reverent, as if he's afraid you might disappear if he holds you too tightly. You can feel the warmth of his breath on your skin, and his thumb gently traces the line of your cheekbone. The tenderness in his touch sends a shiver down your spine.
Your eyes flutter closed as Steve's lips meet yours in a soft, hesitant kiss. It's gentle at first, almost chaste, but as you respond, melting into him, the kiss deepens. Steve's arm wraps around your waist, pulling you flush against him as his tongue traces the seam of your lips, seeking entry.
You part your lips with a soft sigh, your hands coming up to tangle in his hair. The kiss grows more passionate, a slow burn igniting between you. Steve's scent envelops you, a heady mixture of pine, clean sweat, and something uniquely him that makes your omega purr with contentment.
When you finally break apart, you're both breathing heavily. Steve rests his forehead against yours, his eyes still closed as he savors the moment.
This feels like your first true kiss - the one that will matter for your future.
"We should head back," he says. "Bucky's probably wondering where we are."
You nod, taking his hand as you start walking back towards the cottage.
When the cottage comes into view, you see Bucky sitting on the porch steps, his metal arm glinting in the sunlight, and Alpine curled up next to him. He looks up as you approach, a mixture of relief and curiosity crossing his features.
"There you are," he says, standing up as you draw near. "I was starting to worry."
Steve gives him a reassuring smile. "Sorry, Buck. We’re good."
Bucky's eyes flick between you and Steve, taking in your joined hands and the lingering flush on your cheeks. A knowing smile tugs at the corner of Bucky's mouth. "I can see that," he says, his voice warm with affection. "Everything okay?"
You nod, squeezing Steve's hand. "Yes. Actually, we have something we'd like to discuss with you."
Bucky's eyebrows raise slightly, but he nods, gesturing towards the door. "Let's head inside then. We can talk over breakfast."
The three of you make your way into the cozy cottage. Alpine trails along as well. You note how quickly she has gravitated to Bucky, and you can’t help but grin. Breakfast is simple, but the three of you move together in the kitchen to quickly pull things together, then bring it all to the table and set in.
"So," Bucky says, his steel-blue eyes moving between you and Steve. "What do you want to discuss?"
You set down your piece of toast and swallow. “Wakanda.”
Bucky's eyes widen slightly, his fork pausing halfway to his mouth. "Wakanda?" he repeats, his voice a mix of surprise and curiosity.
Steve nods, and you reach out to place a reassuring hand on Bucky's arm. "We’ve just been talking about it, Buck. We think it might be good for us to go there for a while."
Bucky sets his fork down, his brow furrowing as he processes this information. "For treatment?" he asks softly, his eyes meeting Steve's.
You lean forward, your voice gentle but firm. "For all of us, Bucky. We all need time to heal, to adjust. And Wakanda has resources we can't find anywhere else."
Bucky's gaze shifts to you, his expression softening. "You're right about that," he admits. "The time I spent there, well, even in just two weeks there it helped more than the time I spent trying to fix things on my own the two years before that.”
Bucky is quiet for a moment, his eyes distant as he processes this information. You can almost see the gears turning in his head, weighing the pros and cons.
"It's a good idea," he says finally, his voice soft but certain. "Wakanda would also be an appropriate place to perform the pack rites and rituals. And..." he pauses, a small smile tugging at his lips, "I miss Shuri's jokes about my arm."
You and Steve both laugh. Steve was going to be your tougher sell, but you’re still relieved Bucky is sold on the plan. Having a plan is reassuring, and there are many more plans you all need to discuss this morning.
“Wakanda is perfect, actually. I’ll reach out to Shuri and see if they could even send one of the Dora Milaje to come escort you there and keep you safe until Steve and I follow and join you.”
“What?” you asked, not anticipating this suggestion at all.
Bucky looks at Steve. “We have loose ends to clip.”
Steve nods.
"Absolutely not!" you protest, your voice rising. "We're not splitting up. We just found each other again."
Steve reaches out, placing a calming hand on your arm. "It's just for a short time," he says softly. "We need to make sure there's no trail leading back to you, to us. Bucky and I can handle it quickly and efficiently."
You shake your head, feeling a knot of anxiety forming in your stomach. "No. We're stronger together. Isn't that what we all agreed on?"
Bucky leans forward, his eyes meeting yours. "Omega, we're trying to protect you. To protect our future together. If there's even a chance someone could track us down..."
You feel a chill run down your spine at the edge in Bucky's voice. You know exactly who he's talking about - the people responsible for what happened to Steve.
"I understand why you want to do this," you say, looking between them. "But I can't just sit safely in Wakanda while you two put yourselves in danger. We face it together."
Steve's jaw tightens. "No, Omega. Not this time. There’s no question about this - it's too dangerous."
You feel a surge of frustration and hurt at his words. "I'm not some useless and fragile thing that needs to be protected, Steve."
Bucky reaches out, taking your hand in his. "Omega, you’re one of the strongest people I’ve ever known. This isn't about you being fragile. This is about Hydra, and we need to know you're safe while we take care of them."
You pull your hand away, standing up abruptly. "And what if something happens to you? What if you don't come back? I can't lose you again. Either of you."
Steve stands as well, moving around the table to pull you into his arms. You resist at first, but eventually melt into his embrace. "We will come back," he murmurs into your hair. "I promise you. We've been through too much to lose each other now."
You cling to him, breathing in his scent, trying to calm your racing heart. "I hate this," you whisper. "I hate feeling helpless."
Bucky comes up behind you, sandwiching you between him and Steve. His metal arm wraps around your waist, cool against your skin. "You're not helpless," he says softly. "You're our anchor. Our reason for coming back."
You turn your head to look at him, seeing the determination in his steel-blue eyes. "Promise me," you say, your voice barely above a whisper. "Promise me you'll both come back."
Bucky's eyes soften as he meets your gaze. "We promise," he says, his voice low and fervent. "We'll always come back to you."
Steve nods, his arms tightening around you. "Always," he echoes, his breath warm against your ear.
You feel a shiver run through you at their words, at the intensity in their eyes. The air around you seems to thicken, charged with an electric tension that makes your skin tingle.
Bucky leans in, his lips brushing against your neck. "Let us show you," he murmurs, his voice a low rumble that sends heat pooling in your belly. "Let us prove our promise."
Steve's hand comes up to cup your cheek, turning your face towards him. His blue eyes are dark with desire as he captures your lips in a searing kiss. You melt into him, your heart yearning for this, even though you know they can’t guarantee their promises, only their intentions.
You need this.
The air grows thick with the scent of arousal as Steve's lips find your other side, trailing soft kisses along your jaw.
"Yes," you breathe, tilting your head to give them better access. "Show me."
In a fluid motion, Steve lifts you into his arms, carrying you towards the bedroom. Bucky follows close behind, his eyes dark with desire. As Steve gently lays you on the bed, Bucky's hands are already working at the buttons of your shirt.
"We've got you, Omega," Steve murmurs, his fingers tracing the curve of your cheek. "We'll always come back to you."
Bucky's metal hand slides under your shirt, cool against your heated skin. "You're ours," he growls softly, nipping at the sensitive skin of your neck. "And we're yours. Always."
Your breath catches as their hands and mouths explore your body, peeling away layers of clothing. Steve's lips trail down your collarbone while Bucky's metal fingers dance along your inner thigh, sending shivers of pleasure through you.
"Please," you gasp, arching into their touch. "I need you both."
Steve pulls back, his eyes dark with desire as he meets your gaze. "We're here, Omega. We've got you."
Bucky's hand slides up to cup your face, turning you towards him for a deep, passionate kiss. You moan into his mouth as Steve's fingers find your most sensitive spots, teasing and stroking with expert precision.
Your body arches as waves of pleasure wash over you, Steve and Bucky's touches setting every nerve ending alight. Their scents mingle in the air - pine and metal, sweat and arousal - surrounding you in a cocoon of desire and comfort.
Bucky breaks the kiss, trailing his lips down your neck as Steve moves lower, his mouth replacing his fingers. You cry out at the sensation, one hand tangling in Steve's hair while the other grips Bucky's metal arm.
"That's it, sweetheart," Bucky murmurs against your skin. "Let us take care of you."
Steve hums in agreement, the vibration sending shockwaves through your body. Your hips buck involuntarily, seeking more contact.
Bucky's flesh hand finds your breast, kneading gently as his thumb brushes over your nipple. Steve tenderly kisses and licks your cunt, while Bucky’s mouth latches onto your other breast. Then, Bucky moves down the bed and spreads your legs wider to make room for both of your alpha super soldiers. He begins kissing up your inner thigh, and then they take turns giving you pleasure in your most intimate area, worshipping your sex until you’re dripping, writhing, and begging for more.
Steve moves to the head of the bed, his eyes dark with desire as he watches you. With gentle hands, Bucky flips you over, guiding you onto your hands and knees. You shiver in anticipation as you feel Bucky's strong hands grip your hips, positioning you. The cool air of the room kisses your heated skin, making you shiver with anticipation.
Bucky's metal hand trails down your spine, leaving goosebumps in its wake. "You're so beautiful like this," he murmurs, his voice low and husky. Steve cups your face tenderly, his thumb tracing your bottom lip.
You gasp as Bucky slowly enters you from behind, stretching and filling you deliciously. Steve's hand tangles in your hair, gently guiding your mouth to his hardened length. You eagerly take him in, moaning around him as Bucky begins to move.
The room fills with the sounds of pleasure - skin against skin, breathless moans and whispered endearments. Bucky's thrusts are deep and measured, each one sending sparks of pleasure through your body. Steve's fingers massage your scalp as you work him with your mouth, your tongue swirling around his tip.
"That's it, sweetheart," Bucky growls, his grip on your hips tightening. "You feel so good."
Steve's breath hitches as you take him deeper. "Perfect," he murmurs, his voice strained with pleasure. "So perfect for us."
"Are you ready for us, Omega?" Steve asks, his voice thick with need.
You nod eagerly, your body thrumming with desire. "Please," you breathe, looking up at Steve through your lashes. He dips down to take your lips in a brief, possessive kiss.
Your body trembles with anticipation as Steve pulls away from your mouth, his hand guiding you back into position. You moan around him, loving the feeling of being filled by both of your alpha super soldiers.
Bucky's thrusts become more urgent, his hands gripping your hips tightly as he picks up the pace. "You feel so good," he growls.
Steve's fingers dig into your hair as he begins to move faster in your mouth. You eagerly take him in, wanting to please both of them. The intensity of having them both inside you is almost overwhelming, but it's a the kind of overload that you need right now.
As they move together in tandem, you feel yourself reaching the edge. Then you're lost in a haze of pleasure with your release. All you can think about is how they fill you physically, and how they consume every inch of your soul now as well.
Bucky's thrusts become more erratic as he buries himself deep inside you one final time before finding his release. His grunts and groans mix with Steve's moans as he comes undone in your mouth.
Feeling the vibrations from their orgasms only heightens your own pleasure. Your walls clench around Bucky as waves of ecstasy pulse through your body.
The three of you collapse onto the bed in a tangle of limbs and racing hearts. Breathing heavily, Bucky pulls out and collapses next to you while Steve rests against the headboard.
You lay there for several moments, catching your breath and basking in the afterglow. Steve's hand gently strokes your hair while Bucky's metal arm drapes protectively across your waist. The room is quiet except for your collective breathing gradually slowing to a normal pace.
"I still don't like the idea of being separated," you murmur, breaking the silence.
Steve sighs softly, his fingers still carding through your hair. "We know, sweetheart.”
Bucky presses a gentle kiss to your shoulder. "It won't be for long. Just enough time for us to tie up loose ends and make sure no one can track us."
"I understand," you say softly, "but I still wish there was another way."
Steve leans down to press a gentle kiss to your forehead. "We'll be as quick as we can," he promises. "And we'll stay in regular contact."
Bucky nods in agreement. "You know we won't take any unnecessary risks. The goal is to get back to you as soon as possible."
You sigh, snuggling closer to both of them. "I know. I trust you both. It's just... after everything we've been through, the thought of being apart again is terrifying."
"We feel the same," Steve murmurs, his arm tightening around you. "But this is to protect our future. To make sure we can live without always looking over our shoulders."
Bucky's metal fingers trace soothing patterns on your skin. "You’re strong, Omega, this will be nothing compared to,” Bucky pauses, and you feel both alphas tense.
“Compared to what I put you through,” Steve finishes.
You turn to face Steve, cupping his cheek gently. "That wasn't you," you say firmly.
Steve's eyes are still haunted as he meets your gaze. "But I still did those things. I still hurt you."
Bucky reaches over, placing a hand on Steve's shoulder. "We've both done things we regret under Hydra's control. But we're free now."
You nod, pressing a soft kiss to Steve's lips. "And we're moving forward. Together."
Steve pulls you closer, burying his face in your hair. You can feel the tension slowly leaving his body as he breathes in your scent.
"We can't change the past, but we can shape the future," Bucky reminds him.
"You're right," Steve murmurs after a moment.
“I know, punk. You’re the one who told me that over and over and over. I’ll remind you as many times as you need, because that’s what you did for me.”
"Thank you," Steve says softly, his voice thick with emotion. "Both of you. I don't know what I'd do without you."
You snuggle closer to Steve, feeling Bucky press against your back. The warmth of their bodies and the mingling of your scents creates a cocoon of comfort and safety.
"You'll never have to find out," you murmur, pressing a kiss to Steve's chest.
Bucky hums in agreement, his metal arm draping over both you and Steve. "Till the end of the line, remember?"
"How could I forget?" Steve chuckles softly, the sound rumbling in his chest. “Omega,” his voice turns serious again, “you woke me up from the nightmare, helped me shed the specter of Captain Hydra; and yesterday you anchored me back to my true self again, Buck.”
Your heart both aches and soars, and you have to kiss him. When you break off, Bucky reaches for Steve’s head, and then he presses their foreheads together over your shoulder. It’s an intimate moment between all of you that you don't want to break, and so you don’t and neither do they.
You lie there in silence for a while, basking in the afterglow and the closeness of your alphas. Despite the lingering anxiety about the upcoming separation, you feel safe now. You feel loved now. You never want to leave this now.
“I’ll go,” you finally whisper. “But can it be tomorrow? For one more day, please let it be like this, here, just us.”
Steve and Bucky exchange a glance over your head, a silent conversation passing between them in an instant. After a moment, they both nod.
"Of course, Omega," he says softly, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "We can have one more day here, just us."
Bucky's arm tightens around you, pulling you closer. "We'll make the most of it," he murmurs, his breath warm against your neck.
You feel a wave of relief wash over you. One more day of peace, of being together, before facing the challenges ahead. You snuggle deeper into their embrace, savoring the warmth and comfort of their bodies.
"Thank you," you whisper, your voice thick with emotion. Bucky buries his face in the crook of your neck, Steve’s hand moves from your hip up your side, and you get lost in them again.
go to the double epilogue: THE DAWN HAS COME
↠ Masterlist | Aspen's Ask Box | Field Guide to the Forest
Ah! I'm just! Final chapter finally getting to share it with you all! It's been such a long journey! Thank you for those who have been waiting patiently. I hope you're feeling all the things!
#bucky barnes#bucky barnes smut#steve rogers#bucky barnes fan fiction#captain hydra#aspen wrote something#steve rogers x reader#omegaverse#marvel omegaverse#warm shadows au#female reader#bucky barnes x reader x steve rogers#steve rogers x reader x bucky barnes#bucky barnes x reader
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Irrevocably [ZCL] (M)
Description: You were friends with benefits with Chenle until he got a girlfriend...fast forward months later, and now they've broken up--leaving Chenle to come back to you, very much in need of a distraction.
DID YOU MISS ME?! It's been so long someone should chop my hands off omg
Genre: Smut. Angst. Read at your own discretion!!! Read the warnings first please! It's mostly smut tho tbh
Also it's not proofread or anything crazy like that but I do hope y'all like it...I've been so busy sos
Content Warnings: Explicit, rough, unprotected sex (don't do the unprotected part), Chenle says pretty girl again (not sorry) and also slut because duality (again?), overstimulation, multiple orgasms (both), cum eating (like he actually eats his...own cum...), he's pretty pussy drunk in this he cums twice, Chenle is manipulative as hell in this!!! he is not a good guy in this fic!!! Do not read if you don't like it!!!!! Also I'm not sure if this can be considered infidelity but if you're sensitive to that topic read with caution!
Word Count: 4,877
Pairing: Zhong Chenle x Reader (mentions of Mark Lee x Reader)
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
Juliet's Masterlist | Requests
You can’t even say you haven’t heard from him in a while. That’s far from the truth—and in your opinion, maybe you hear from him too often. Your friendship was constructed long before any other aspect, but for as long as you could remember, it’s been you and Chenle.
Now there’s you, and there’s him. Inherently separate.
Your situation with him was simple—friends with benefits. And everything was working great at first, and the end wasn’t traumatic and the world didn’t crumble. You weren’t in love with each other, and you both mutually understood that the second someone has the potential to become more in one of your lives that you’d stop immediately.
So, when Chenle started talking to his now girlfriend, you did the right thing. The respectful thing. You backed off, and you wouldn’t say you regret it. He’s happy—happier than he was before, and that’s all you want for him. You’ve been friends for forever, after all, and what would that make you if you had ill wishes for him?
It was three months after he started dating his girlfriend that he introduced you to one of his friends, Mark. Fortunately, you got along with him well, and he gave you a much needed distraction from the empty void Chenle had left in your life. He’d been more than sex, but less than love. He gave you company and companionship, even if it was in an unconventional way.
You’d been up front and honest with Mark about your relationship with Chenle, but he didn’t mind as long as you were sure there hadn’t been feelings involved. For Chenle, you weren’t sure if he ever told his girlfriend about you. You wouldn’t blame him if he hadn’t, but considering you’d been sleeping together up until their first date, it might have been a good thing to mention.
The difference was simple—you and Mark weren’t anything, not really, but Chenle and his girlfriend were, in their words, serious. In fact, in the past four months, you hadn’t even slept with Mark. The most he was at this point was someone to keep you company.
And then everything blew up.
Chenle called you at 9 p.m., almost nine months after he started dating his girlfriend. You were in your apartment by yourself, watching the same TV show for the 70th time. You stare at your phone screen in confusion before you answer it.
“Hey,”
“Hey.” He lets out a breath, and the defeat in his voice hints something’s wrong.
“Everything okay?” you ask him, sitting up on your couch.
“We broke up.” Chenle pauses, maybe to contemplate what he says next. “Can I come see you? I know it’s random, and I probably shouldn’t, but to be bluntly fucking honest, I’ve missed you.”
“We talk all the time,” you mention and cradle your knees to your chest.
The thought of allowing Chenle here so late scares you—old habits die hard. You feel like you owe more than that to both Mark and Chenle. Mark, because while you two aren’t together, you’ve grown quite close over the past few months. Chenle, because he’s probably not thinking straight at the moment.
“You’re the only one I can talk to about this,” he mumbles.
Your heart sinks. “It was because of me?”
“I…Not exactly. It wasn’t you at all. It was us. And it was me for not saying anything.” He sighs, and you envision the way he tugs his fingers through his hair.
“You never told her?”
“I didn’t think I needed to,” he says. “What am I supposed to say? ‘Oh, hey, by the way, I used to fuck one of my closest friends on the regular, but now that you’re here, I stopped.’ That doesn’t sound great.”
“Better than her finding out some other way.” You chew on your bottom lip. “I told Mark.”
“That’s different,” Chenle replies. “You’re not dating Mark.”
A moment of silence passes between you two, and when you don’t respond, he clears his throat.
“Oh. You are.”
“It’s not like that.”
“So, what is it like? Is it like what we were?” He sounds shorter, as if he’s no longer enjoying the conversation.
You scoff. “It’s none of your business, Chenle. Mark is nice. And you’re the one who introduced us anyway.”
“Mark is nice,” he repeats, snorting. “You act like I don’t know you. Nice isn’t exactly your type.”
“You can come here if you stop being a dick,” you tell him. “But we’re only talking.”
“Good. I’ve got a lot to say.”
You debate changing after he hangs up, but Chenle’s already seen you at your worst. Your shorts and T-shirt won’t faze him in the slightest. Nerves like this haven’t swarmed you since the first time you slept with him. Clearly, your body doesn’t get the memo that this isn’t a booty call.
And when he arrives, you realize how well he fits. The dim, golden lighting reflecting off of his skin, the dark, oversized clothes he likes to wear, the way his hair is parted. Everything about him is exactly as you remember. It’s odd to think that way, because really, you’ve seen him as often as you used to. Things were just…different.
And under these circumstances, it’s awkward. But even when he was dating his girlfriend, there were times where the two of you were alone—nothing ever happened, of course, but it hadn’t ever been so nerve wracking until now.
It isn’t for long, though. Within seconds of your thoughts running wild, he’s closing the distance between you and pulling you into a tight hug. You exhale in relief and return the gesture with no hesitation. He takes a deep breath, almost as if he’s inhaling your scent.
Something about this hurts. Your ribcage suddenly feels like a prison, and all you want is for your heart to be free. Why does it feel like something’s stabbing it?
“I’m sorry for asking to come over so late,” he whispers. “And for being a dick about Mark. It’s not my business.”
There’s a twist deep in your chest. You wonder if there’s truly anything left in there.
“It’s okay, Le.” Your voice is muffled by his shirt. “Let’s sit and you can tell me what happened.”
You move away from him, lightly grabbing his hand to lead him over to your couch. When you’re both seated, he rests his head on your shoulder. You reach up to play with his hair, and instinct you became familiar with when he needed comfort back when you two were messing around.
“She asked about you.” His fingers toy with yours, warm touch gently grazing your skin. “Really, I had no idea what to say. There isn’t much to say, you know? So, that’s what I said. I told her we’ve been friends for forever and…that’s it.”
“Technically not wrong.” You chuckle, but the ache within you only grows.
“I went to shower and when I got out, she was going through my phone. By the time I realized what she was doing, she’d already found more than enough to be pissed.”
“What was it?”
“Pictures. In our text conversations from like…almost a year ago. I get why she was upset, you know? But it’s not like they were recent. Or even in my camera roll, for fuck’s sake.” He shuffles a bit closer, his warmth pressing into you. “But I should’ve checked and made sure. Or something. So, I’m sorry someone else saw those, (Y/N).”
“Did I look good at least?” you joke.
“Oh, fuck off.” He laughs, shaking his head. “You always look good and you know it.”
You get a sudden, overwhelming urge to look at him. His words make your stomach turn, and you’re desperate to figure out what the hell is going on with you.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah.” He ponders for a moment. “I thought I’d be a little more upset, but the only thing I was really thinking about was coming to see you.”
Chenle sits up, eyebrows slightly furrowed as he takes you in. His gentle brown eyes trail over you, unrecognizable emotions swimming around in his irises. You find him still as extraordinary as ever. His features so sharp, lips perfectly full. You fight the craving to reach out and trace his jawline.
“It’s just…” he murmurs. “It just always comes back to you, doesn’t it?”
“Chenle…”
“It’s been so long,” he continues. “Since I’ve seen you like this.”
“We hung out all the time.”
“No. Not like this. I know why you did, but you got so distant from me. Didn’t you ever think about me? That whole time?” He wets his lips.
“How could you ask me that?” you breathe out. “I thought about you all the time, but you weren’t mine to think about.”
“When I thought of you, it used to hurt. I used to have to distract myself from you because it was wrong to want you when I had everything else.” His gaze flicks down to your lips, and you feel every ounce of you crumble to pieces.
“It’s not…wrong anymore,” you say.
His eyes flutter shut, eyelashes brushing against his cheeks, and the next thing you know, his mouth is on yours. You let out a shaky breath against him, but quickly reciprocate what he gives you. All hesitation is out the window now, all thoughts of him being too upset at a moment like this fly from your brain.
It’s Chenle. He’s kissing you. This is familiar. Right, even.
“God, it’s been too long.” He reaches up to cup your cheek, thumb rubbing your skin. “Need you, baby. Never wanna lose you like that again.”
Your heart is beating so fast, you’re not exactly sure how to respond to that. The longer you take in every word leaving his mouth, the quicker you realize what’s happening to you.
You haven’t slept with Mark because you do have feelings for Chenle. It hits you like a freight train, and the fear sinks in only for a second before you slam your lips back to his. Being with him like this feels good, like nothing could go wrong.
The quietest moan slips from his mouth into yours, and just like it used to, heat floods your core. His hand slips beneath your shirt, his scalding touch trailing across your side before settling on the small of your back.
You pull away from him and gently push against his chest. “Do you even know what you’re doing right now?”
“Need a distraction.” He swallows hard. “That’s what we are for each other right? She’s out of the picture, so I get to have you again?”
You shake your head. “Only when we’re both available. Not just you.”
“Did you fuck him?” Chenle tone drops, a dark hint of jealousy gracing those narrowed brown eyes. One of his hands drops down to your thigh, tracing along the hem of your shorts. “Is that why you don’t want me anymore? He’s better or something?”
You let out a shaky breath. “I—Chenle, I haven’t.”
Wetting his lips, his touch trails higher, his skin burning against yours in the best way. “Don’t you miss me? Or at least the way I made you feel? When’s the last time someone made you cum?”
He notices when your legs press together, desperate for any sort of friction between them. You’re fighting every urge you have, wanting nothing more than to have Chenle right here on your couch, but something holds you back.
Leaning closer, he hums lowly in your ear, “You know what I can do.” His lips press against the spot below your ear, slowly heading down until his tongue runs along your pulse.
“Damn it,” you groan, pushing him back. “Take your pants off.”
As you stand up to push your shorts and panties to the floor, he lifts his hips to push his sweats to down his legs. He reaches into his boxers and strokes himself slowly.
“C’mon, baby.” He smirks at you. “Sit on it.”
You straddle his lap, bracing your hands on his shoulders as he pulls his cock out. One hand grips your hip and he holds you above him.
“Do we need a condom?” he asks, gaze glazed with want.
“I haven’t slept with anyone,” you mutter, face heating up for more reasons than one.
“It was just…” he trails off and gulps. “You know. I’m clean.”
The idea of him with her is almost enough to snap you out of it, but the last thing you plan on doing is getting off his lap. You ignore the sting of your heart and instead trade it for the sting of your walls stretching to accommodate Chenle with no prep. Whining at the pain, you stop after a couple inches.
“S’okay, baby,” he encourages you. “Take it slow.”
You dig your nails into his shoulders, lifting up before sinking back down to take a bit more of him than the last time. He breathes heavily, biting down on his bottom lip while his chest heaves.
“Just a little more.” Chenle slowly pulls you closer until he’s fully seated inside you.
The stretch has your legs shaking, whimpers escaping you as he whispers praises to you.
“Such a good girl,” he coos. “Letting me fill this pretty pussy with my cock.”
Chenle tugs your shirt over your head, freeing your bare breasts. He lets out a small sound at the sight before leaning down to kiss them, teeth nipping and tongue flicking your nipple.
Unable to hold back anymore, you push him back harshly. His lips part as you grind, sweet moans escaping him at the same time yours do.
“So tight,” he groans. “You waited ‘cause you knew no one else could do this to you, huh?”
“Shut up,” you command him.
His eyebrows raise for the briefest moment, until you start bouncing on his cock. Wetness starts squelching around the two of you, aiding you in your quick movements on top of him.
“Yeah, that’s it, baby.” Chenle thrusts up to match you, hands trailing around your body to squeeze your ass harshly. A slap comes next, the sound resounding through the room.
Your hips jolt, thrown off your rhythm at the stinging sensation on your skin. Nails leaving angry, red crescent moons in his skin, you rock back and forth to stabilize yourself before continuing. The sound of your arousal would embarrass you under any other circumstances, but the fucked out expression on Chenle’s face is enough to keep you going.
You don’t hold back your moans, letting the needs of your body take over instead of whatever the hell is going on in your head. He feels so fucking good inside you, the rough slide of his length against your walls, the way he throbs with want for you. The twitch of his cock inside you has a knot tightening in your stomach.
“Look at me,” he says roughly.
You don’t bother listening, too focused on your own pleasure to justify stopping.
“I said fucking look at me.” He grabs your face, pulling you close so you're inches away from him, hooded, hazy brown eyes devouring you. “Keep fucking yourself on my cock.”
You let out a weak moan, legs aching as you continue, but you know you need more. Trying to grind down, you do whatever you can to get friction on your clit. Whines slip past your lips, with the mind-shattering high just out of reach.
“Use your words, pretty girl.” Chenle slaps your ass again.
“Close,” you practically whimper. “Touch me. Fuck, please.”
Immediately, he lets go of his harsh grip on your cheeks, reaching between you two and quickly finding your clit. Your nails scratch down his shoulders, leaving marks as his fast circles push you over the edge.
You scream out in pleasure, your vision blacking out as you’re swept up in your climax. Crumpling into him, you squirm on top of him until he wraps his arm around your waist, warm seed coating your insides.
His chest heaves, lips parting as he rests his head back on the couch cushion. He gulps and strokes your hair while still slowly rocking up into you. You finally work up the energy to get off of him, but he holds you down.
“No,” he murmurs, breathless. “Not yet. Not done.”
Your body heats all over again, the idea of another round sends tingle down your spine. Goosebumps form on your skin, but you listen. Something has to make up for the lost time between you two.
“Need you again.” He nips where your neck and shoulder connects. “Can I take you to your room?”
You nod, unable to speak. He lifts you deftly from the couch, carefully walking over to your room like he’s done hundreds of times before. You hold onto him desperately, never wanting to let him go for more reasons than one.
As soon as you’re both on your bed, he’s already beginning to thrust again. You dig your nails into his back, but he grabs both of your wrists and pins them above your head.
“Be good,” he warns, filling you up over and over, ever so slowly. “Little pussy’s so greedy, sucking me in like this.”
Your eyes roll back in your head, the weight of him on top of you making you whine until your throat’s raw.
Every nerve-ending is on edge from your previous high, skin tingling and burning wherever his fingers trace shapes on you. You can barely keep your eyes open, the gentle brush of his chest against yours has your weak-minded state reading into this much more than you should.
If you could form actual words, you’d probably accidentally confess to him. He works through his own overstimulation, his jaw clenched tightly as he works your body expertly.
“I missed you,” he whispers, dipping his head down to nip along your neck. “Did you miss me?”
“Yes,” you force out, barely able to muster up the words. “God, yes.”
He hums, tonguing along the pulse in your neck. “You didn’t fuck him ‘cause he can’t make you feel like this, can he?”
You want to be mad at him for bringing Mark up at a time like this, but his words only make you shiver. He’s right. You can’t be mad at him when he’s right, and certainly not when your brain is fuzzy with the pleasure of his cock rubbing so, so slowly against your inner walls. Nobody could ever fill you like Chenle does.
“Answer me.” He thrusts particularly hard, jolting you up the mattress.
“Fuck, he can’t make me feel like you do.” You’re not entirely sure if your words are coherent, but Chenle seems satisfied by what you said.
“And you’d better remember that, too.” He releases your wrists and reaches between you two, resuming circles on your clit. “Could fuck you all night. You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Getting your cunt filled with my cum as many times as you can handle?”
You wrap your legs around his waist in a desperate attempt to keep him close, the angle allowing him slightly deeper inside you. Between the delicious stretch of your walls and the uniform, skilled rubbing on your sensitive bud, your body shudders uncontrollably. Your back arches and your hands fly to his hair, loud, obscene moans pouring from your lips.
Chenle’s thrusts pick up as he helps you ride out your high, eyebrows furrowed as he tries to keep his steady pace. He slows to a stop, sweat making his hair stick to his forehead, he kisses you, tongue already slipping past your lips to dominate your mouth the same way he’s dominated the rest of you.
“Think you can get on all fours for me?” he asks, his breath fanning across your face.
“Again?”
“Please, baby, I’m close already, just need a little more.” He presses kisses on your cheeks and the tip of your nose. “I need it so bad.”
You nod, shakily removing your legs from around his waist. He guides you to the position he wants, your head resting on the mattress as he squeezes your ass.
“You’re still so fucking wet,” he groans, a slap resonating around the room. “Might wanna hold on, pretty girl. I’m not going easy on you.”
Despite being an absolute rag doll, you clench in excitement at the idea of having him inside you again. You push back toward him, urging him to fuck you. He uses his knee to nudge your legs apart, and even though they’re shaking, you plan on letting him pound into you until they fucking give out.
He runs the head up and down your folds, switching between barely pushing his tip inside and tapping it on your clit.
“God, I can’t fucking take this anymore,” Chenle growls, and the next thing you know, he’s thrusting inside you with as much force as he can. You scream, gripping onto the sheets and biting down on a pillow to attempt to silence yourself.
With all the stimulation, you feel constantly on the edge of another orgasm. His hips slap against your ass, the clapping sounds emphasizing your pleasure. Squelches of wetness float around too, the stickiness dripping down your thighs onto the bed the longer he has you in this position.
He shifts slightly so his balls smack your twitching clit with every thrust. You’re barely able to think straight, and you’re half-sure you’re drooling, but Chenle slams you into your third orgasm of the night rather easily. Your legs threaten to buckle, and he loops his arm around you to keep you up.
After a couple more thrusts, he moans loudly and spills deep inside you, chest heaving at the effort. Both of you wait in silence for a few moments, him to regain composure and you to remember how to breathe. He gently pulls out of you, turning you to drop your back down on the mattress. Once he gets out of bed, he stops in front of you and pulls you to the edge by your ankles. Nudging your legs apart, he sinks down to his knees.
“What are you doing?” you ask, rising up to your shaky elbows.
“Need a taste,” he says, mesmerized by the mess leaking out of your entrance. Swiping some of it up on his finger, he offers it to you. “Taste us, pretty girl. We’re so good together.”
You lean closer and wrap your lips around him, giving a harsh suck before you release him.
“God, baby, your pussy is so perfect when you’re leaking my cum.”
You’re not expecting him to move forward and flatten his tongue against your core. He holds your hips down to the bed, tentatively licking your slit. Without much effort from him, he’s reduced you to a mewling mess again, core throbbing with sensitivity even when he barely touches you. Your arms immediately give out, slumping you back onto the sheets as he works your core with his tongue.
It’s odd how much the idea of him eating you out when he came inside you turns you on. As limp as your body is, you relish in all of the pleasure he’s willing to give you. His tongue dances around your slit, alternating between slipping it between your folds and flicking your clit. You lazily tangle your fingers in his hair, tugging just enough for him to moan against you.
Your hips jerk when his lips wrap around your bud, and next thing you know, his hands hold you down. You call out his name, pulling with the grip you have on his hair to tell him you’re much too sensitive to continue.
“I know, baby,” he murmurs, blowing cold air on you. “Just a little bit more, okay? One more time.”
And then he’s back at the apex of your thighs, working much faster and harsher with his movements to get you to the edge faster. You shatter all over again, a mantra of noises passing by your lips as your thighs clench around his head.
You must actually black out for a moment, because when you come to, Chenle has pulled away from your core, his lips and chin coated with your arousal. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, his expression equally as exhausted as yours.
He grabs a towel to clean you up, but both of you are beyond tired from all the activity. You shift up on your bed, not bothering to say anything else to him as you slide beneath your blanket. When you and Chenle did things before, he always stayed. He always pulled you into his chest and whispered sweet nothings into your ear until you fell asleep.
You’re not sure if that will be the case today.
Except he does. He carefully crawls into bed next to you, turning you toward him and pulling you to him. Kissing the top of your head, he taps his fingers against your arm.
“I really missed you,” he says.
“Me, too.” You nod, but something makes your heart twist in your chest.
“Can I be honest for a second?”
“Of course.”
“I knew the pictures were there,” he whispers. “Maybe it’s shitty, but I couldn’t delete them. Sometimes, I looked back at our old conversations—not the sexual ones—and just…thought of you. I couldn’t do anything to erase you and what we did from my life. I didn’t want to.”
You wonder if that’s his idea of a confession. If he’s trying to tell you he has unresolved feelings for you.
“Then why did you stay with her?”
“I don’t know.” He shrugs. “Everyone liked her. My mom told me she thought I’d end up marrying her. She obviously didn’t know about…this. But I couldn’t fucking stop, (Y/N). Everything came back to you.”
“We’ll talk about this in the morning,” you offer. “I’m exhausted.”
“Yeah…” Chenle takes a deep breath. “Yeah. Let’s talk in the morning.”
You and Chenle wake at the same time, to the sound of his phone on the bedside table. Groaning, you massage your forehead and turn away from him. When he answers it, your interest is piqued.
“Hey.” Sleep still weighs on his voice, making it scratchy. “No, I’m not at home.”
There’s a pause, and the vague sound of the other person responding makes your heart twist violently in your chest. It’s her.
“Would you stop jumping to conclusions? I’m at Jisung’s.” Irritation laces in his tone.
You should say something. Let her know somehow that he’s lying, but you don’t. You stay silent in your hurt and wait to see what he could possibly do next.
“Yeah, forgive me for not wanting to be alone after what happened.” Chenle scoffs and runs his fingers through his hair. A sigh follows. “Damn it, I told you that was done. I’m sorry you saw those, okay? They’re from…over a year ago. It didn’t seem relevant to bring it up, and she’s still my friend, so.”
Friend. You almost laugh out loud, but again, you don’t say a word.
“Yeah, of course. Where?”
Another pause from Chenle.
“Yeah, I’ll stop by my house and then I’ll be over there. I’ll see you in half an hour?”
Your heart feels like it’s being shredded into a thousand tiny pieces.
“Thank you.” He sighs, his body deflating. “I’m so sorry for all of this, you know that, right? I’ll see you soon. I love you.”
Tears sting your eyes, and as soon as he hangs up the phone, he hops up to go grab his clothes from the living room. You sit up in your bed, blanket clutched to your chest as you watch him scramble to get dressed.
“I’m sorry, (Y/N), I have to go,” he says, walking back into your room. Leaning in, he attempts to press a kiss to your lips. You turn away from him, chewing the inside of your cheek.
“Where are you going?” you ask, even though you already know the answer.
“She…She wants to talk it out. And I have to go. You understand why, right?” His eyes widen as he scans over your face.
When you say nothing, he sighs.
“I’ll text you later. You can answer or not. Whatever you want to do.” He walks toward the door to your bedroom, but you stop him when he reaches the threshold.
Your eyes sting, your body’s sore, and all you wanted was to tell him the truth this morning. Now it’s clear to you—he’ll never feel the same way for you. He’ll drop anything and everything—you included—if it meant getting her back.
“Chenle.”
He stops, turning to you.
“She’s going to make you choose,” you warn him. “Between her and me.”
Chenle pauses, fingertips gripping the frame. “I know.”
With that, you have nothing else to say, and he wouldn’t have time to hear it anyway. He leaves without another word to you, and when he’s far enough away, your tears finally fall. You want to scream and yell, but your throat is too raw from the long night before to even attempt it.
#nct#nct dream#chenle#nct imagines#nct dream smut#nct scenarios#zhong chenle#chenle x reader#chenle angst#chenle fluff#chenle smut#nct smut#nct angst
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Dreamless sleep
I mentioned in a reblog a few days ago that I sometimes write little oneshots about Henry to comfort myself when shit situations happen. Well I left work today and my car wouldn't start and... I've been struggling with remembering something really difficult that happened to me and I needed a comfort fic. This is that.... I don't normally post them but I wanted to share this one.
Warnings: Mentions of SA possible trigger.
summary: waking up from a nightmare and having a rough day. Henry is always there to help.
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I watched the door shake. The man on the other side determined to break in. If he got through, he was going to hurt me again. Not that he would ever admit it. My attacker had spent just moments before trying to convince me I had asked for it. Like what he did to me was nothing more than him fulfilling my desires. Bile rose in the back of my throat from the thought.
“Go away, Luke! I told you I won’t say anything to anyone! Just leave me alone!” But he didn’t stop. I watched the door knob turn as I looked around my childhood bedroom searching for something to barricade the door. Trying to find anything to keep him out. My strength would not hold much longer. One more shove and he would be inside. I wouldn’t be able to escape him. Just like the last time. As I’m reaching for a chair to press against the door, I stumble. I fall to the floor and the door swings open…
I woke with a start shooting straight up gasping for breath. My heart was racing and I let out a whimper as my eyes adjusted to the darkness. I flinched as I felt a gentle hand touch my hip.
“Darling it’s me, it’s okay.” Henry’s soothing voice broke through my panic. It was a dream. Only, a dream. I swallowed hard and looked out the window. It was storming, the sky was still gray, I looked over at the clock 6:25 my alarm was about to go off,
“Sorry, go back to sleep baby, it was just a bad dream. I’m okay.” I assured him. Henry sat up. He wrapped his arms around me from behind and placed a soft kiss on my head.
“You’re sure? He asked, “Do you want to talk about it?” I shook my head. I hadn’t told him about what happened to me. And as far as I was concerned he didn’t need to know. It was in the past. I was fine. It was rare that I had these dreams.
“No bear, It was silly, just go back to sleep, I need to get up and get ready,” I told him. He took in a deep breath. He still held me close for a moment before hesitantly letting go of my waist.
“Alright, love,” When I got out of bed I turned and kissed him softly. He looked so tired. He’d gotten back so late from set. I hate that I’d woken him up.
“I’ll see you later,” I smiled. He sat up giving me another kiss.
“Have a good day baby,” He said. I slipped out of my bedroom and took a quick shower. I quickly got dressed for the office and left. I picked up a coffee on the way to work. I splashed some on my shirt leaving a small stain. It wasn’t completely obvious but I knew it was there. This would happen today I hate Mondays. Things were in full swing, actually, busy. When I got there. I sat down and tried to focus on my work. But I couldn’t get anything done. All I could think about was that dream.
Lunch rolled around and I realized I’d left it at home. I didn’t want to bother Henry. He hadn’t had a day to himself in a while. So I was just going to pick something up. I ran to the little convenience store down the road and got a little snack. It was much but it would hold me over until the end of the day.
The rest of the day was so busy. So many emails and the work just kept piling up. It was non-stop. I was so ready to get back to my place and spend the evening with Henry. I walked out to my car and put the key in the ignition and… it didn’t start. I tried it again… nothing. How could this happen? It ran perfectly fine on lunch. God, I was just tired and hungry and I want to get home! I’ve spent the whole day reminded of this terrible thing I’d gone through, and now this? Today sucked! I sighed and pulled out my phone. I was going to have to call Henry. I tapped his name and the phone rang. After the second ring, he picked up.
“Hey, babe, you on you’re way back?” He asked. I sighed again.
“No,” I said flatly. “My car won’t start I don’t know what’s wrong, the engine won’t even try to turn over.” I rambled. I could hear myself starting to hyperventilate.
“Slow down, breathe. I’ll be right there.” He promised. In 10 minutes he was pulling up next to my car. We tried to jump it but that did nothing. I sighed and slammed the door. “Whoa, hey, it’s gonna be alright we’ll get it fixed, love,” Henry said grabbing my shoulders gently and making me face him. I felt my lip start to wobble. I didn’t want him to see me cry. In all honesty, we hadn’t been together that long. He hadn’t seen me break down and I wasn’t ready for him to. What if I was too much? What if he didn’t want me anymore?
“I-i’m sorry, today has just been… stressful. I was looking forward to getting home and spending time with you.” I said.
“And you’re going to, we’ll leave the car here I’ll have it looked at in the morning. Let's get back and relax my love.” Henry drove us home. I shuffled inside, quickly changing into comfy clothes. After spending a while trying to fix the car it had gotten a bit late so we decided to order in. Henry ordered dinner while I got cozy on the couch. We ate our Chinese takeout and binged a new Netflix series. My mind wandered not fully paying attention. Getting lost in the dream from this morning. I was staring blankly at a spot on the wall, I didn’t hear Henry say my name. He shook my shoulder and I yelped. His brow raised and his eyes filled with concern, and something that almost looked like hurt.
“What’s going on with you today love?” He asked. I snapped.
“What do you mean? Nothings going on everythings fine!” I said. He sat back looking at me from a sideways glance.
“You’ve been on edge all day,” He stated.
“You haven’t even been with me all day,” I rolled my eyes.
“Is something bothering you?” He asked. I groaned.
“Fucking hell, would you just drop it Henry? I told you, I’m fine!” I shouted. Henry ran a hand through his hair and groaned in frustration.
“I’m just trying to help,” He sighed.
“Yeah, well I didn’t ask, I’m not some helpless damsel you need to save!” I argued.
“I never said that!” he groaned. “But you’ve been stressed since you woke up this Morning.” He stated.
“So?” I deflected, clearly agitated.
So… who’s Luke?” He asked his voice calm. My stomach dropped. How did he know that name?
“I don’t know what your talking about…” I said shifting my eyes to the floor.
“Alayna, when you were having your nightmare, you… said his name, asking him to stop. Who is he?” He asked again. I swallowed hard. I kept my eyes on the floor hidingn the tears that had started to well up.
“No one, must’ve just been a name my brain came up with.” I lied.
“Come on,” he pleaded. “I know you don’t think I’m that stupid.” He said. I looked up at him, eyes meeting his. He was hurt. Hurt that I was shutting him out.
“I don’t think you’re stupid at all, I just… don’t want you to think I … to think less of me.” I sniffled. Henry brushed my hair out of my face and brushed his thumb across my cheek.
“Talk to me, I want to understand.” He said. “Whatever is, I just want to help you,” he stated. I nodded.
“He… is…was a friend of my brothers.” I started. “They were friends since they were kids, I new him since I was a baby.” I explained. Henry nodded. Keeping his hand on my back silently supporting me. I went on. “I thought I could trust him. I was so naive. He always seemed like a good guy. He came to town to celebrate my brothers birthday. And they came back drunk. He woke me up. Because he wanted to say hi. I got up to talk with them and when we went back to bed he… got into my bed. I thought he was joking at first. I thought he was gonna leave.” I looked at Henry. His face was calm, but I knew that he knew what I was going to say. I didn’t miss the anger in his eyes. But he stayed quiet. Letting me get it all out. “He was like a brother to me. I-I don’t know how he could touch me like that. But… I couldn’t do anything. It was wrong, it was so wrong but I was like frozen with fear or shock I don’t know. I know that I told him no. Once. something he wanted to do … I finally was able to find my voice but. It didn’t matter. The next morning he acted like nothing happened. I never said anything. I never pressed charges…nothing. It was years ago. In my dream I confronted him. He told me I couldn’t prove it. He wouldn’t own up to it. I yelled at him. And he tried to convince me I wanted it.. And he…he tried to come after me again.” I cried. Henry quickly wrapped me up in his arms pulling me into him. “That’s when I woke up.” I said. I cried against Henry’s shoulder while he held me. He gently cooed in my ear as if consoling a baby. But it helped. It was the comfort I needed. The shoulder to cry on I never really had. He was quiet for a while. Letting me have this moment and then.
“You know, none of that, is your fault.” He said. His voice soft.
“But I.. let him.” I said. His jaw ticked. Trying to remain calm for me.
“No, he may not have been violent or mean or angry. But he still forced you. He was bigger than you. You had no choice. But to let him do what he wanted. I can’t imagine the pain you’ve felt carrying this for so long. But I won’t let you do it alone anymore.” He said.
“You don’t have to,” I sniffed.
“The bastard is lucky he’s still breathing. He may not live anywhere near you but if he ever comes within a mile of you he’s a dead man.” He growled.
“I’m sorry, about…” I started staring at the ground.
“Look at me,” He cupped my face pulling my eyes back to his. “ I don’t care about some little argument. Or a stressful evening. I care about your wellbeing, your safety, and your peace of mind. There may not be much we can do about what happened. But I can help you feel safer, I can help you feel protected. That’s what matters. Let me care for you. Don’t be too proud to let me help you.” he pleaded. I nodded. I was exhausted. Today had been so hard. I didn’t have the energy to be guarded anymore.
“Okay,” I said.
“You need rest love, you look exhausted.” He said softly. I nodded laying my head against his shoulder. Henry carried me to bed and I immediately curled myself around him. He smiled softly.
“As long as I breathe. He will never, get to you,” He said softly. I nodded my breathing slowly as I listened to his heart beat. Henry softly stroked my hair and I felt my eyes lids get heavy.
“Get some sleep darling, I’ll be right here,” he promised. My eyes closed and everything faded to black. And for the first time in a long time. I had a dreamless sleep. I was safe. Now. Truly safe. I didn’t have to fight this alone.
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I don't feel like this is my best work but it is honest... I'm gonna add my taglist here but you so don't have to read it! if you do thank you! It's just away of me getting all my emotions out. Y'all are like my online emotional support group <3
@foxyjwls007
@enchantedbytomandhenry
@summersong69
@carrie80reads
@identity2212
@caramariehurst
@redheadrouge
@warriormirkwood
@gummydummy19
@deandoesthingstome
@shellyshellshell
@mary-ann84
@starfirewildheart
@henryownsme
@mollymal
@wa-ni
@toooldforobsessions
@pono-pura-vida
@Chloeforde
@liecastillo
@mrsevans90
@evie-119
@margauxmargaux07
@thearcana-moonlight
@secretdream2
@wtfdudesblog
@juliaorpll78
@nothingbettertosay81
#henry cavill#fanfic writing#fanfiction#henry cavil x reader#captain syverson#henry cavill fanfic#henry cavill fanfiction#henry cavill characters#sa tw#sa mention#comfort#comfort fic#comfort character#comfort person#august walker
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you can skip this wall of text its just about the scam this illustration was involved in.
This fairly ordinary illustration of two hands holding was involved in a very weird and convoluted scam. Last month I was commission to illustrate this image for invitations meant to go out for a supposed wedding anniversary coming up in March. The whole commission seemed odd to me I mainly draw dinosaurs and aliens. Not many people know I also draw people but the buyer who called himself Petterson Reid was offering to pay 300 up front and 200 after the work was finished. A nice offer for what was a very simple illustration. I took the job and sent him a very rough sketch of the hands to show him what the final image might look like. He liked the sketch and told me to finish the image after he sent the first payment I went ahead and finished the image that night. I held onto the picture to see if he would really send the 300 dollars first. The buyer wanted to send a check by mail which is weird but I thought he might have been a boomer who didn't understand how to use PayPal. His emails and text seemed like something my grandmother would write very proper and overly polite. I was fairly suspicious of him and waited to see if a check would actually be delivered. To my surprise a check did arrive a week later from Petterson Reid except it was for 2,790 dollars. knowing this was far too much money I asked him if it was a mistake. He said the extra money was for a PayPal invoice to the printers involved in the invitations. He wanted me to use the extra money on the check to pay the printers on his behalf. Again very weird but I chalked it up to an old person who didn't know how to pay online. I cashed the check the next day, since it was from an out of state bank they were putting it on hold for 3 days to see if the funds would clear. I told the buyer about the three day waiting period and asked for the invoice I was suppose to be paying and he went absolutely ape shit. He claimed I was trying to steal his money and was threatening to pursue legal action I was completely shocked by the change in attitude. I had to mute my phone because he kept sending wave after wave of threatening texts. At this point I was 90% sure this was some sort of scam but when I called the bank they said there was nothing to do until the hold expired. I was confident it wouldn't then to my surprise the check cleared and the money was in my account. At this point I had the finished artwork and the money so I wanted to get this crazy asshole on his way so I wouldn't have to deal with him anymore. I told him to send the invoice for the printer and I would pay it with the money on the check then I would send the picture and our business would be done. This prick sends some half assed looking invoice with a payable link on PayPal. When I try to pay, it says payment will be held till Feb 7th. Apparently this date is too late for the printers so now that processing payment has been canceled by the printer in favor of a new payment process through Zelle. I was trying to figure out what was going on, if its a scam what is the take the entirety of the check was still in my account it didn't even say it was pending. I go to pay on Zelle and discover the 2,790 dollars has been rescinded by the bank. I call and learn this ass hair had sent a forged check to the bank in an effort to have me pay these fake invoices with my own money. He guessed the bank would deposit the check without fully vetting it for the standard 10 days since I'm a long time member. He knew he had until about five a clock that day before the bank would catch the discrepancy. He was posing as the printer in order to scam 4,740 dollars from me through both attempted payment methods. luckily for me I'm broke as hell right now and didn't have the money in my own account to cover either payment with out the check. everything has been taken care of now I just thought I better share this story since I've never seen a scam like this before. It took an entire month for him to essentially get nothing I really don't know what to think of any of this its such a weird scheme.
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Kinktober Day 31: Aftercare
Pairings: Izana x male reader
Warnings: Male!reader, hard dom/top!reader, sub/bottom!Izana, rough sex, spanking, brat taming, lots of fluff and love
Prompt List by: starsandskies 🧡
It was around noon and you were innocently reaching for a plate in a cabinet from your kitchen when his arm entered your vision, sneaking up on you and reaching for the exact same thing that you were. Izana was shorter than you so he had to really press against you to grab what he needed, lightly grinding against your ass in the process
The gesture was certainly on purpose as Izana winked at you while turning to walk back out of the room, his bratty attitude on display for the nth day in a row. You had already cut him a lot of slack with lighter punishments than usual and more warnings than he probably deserved...and this little stunt was the straw that finally broke your patience
Promptly stomping after him, you grabbed Izana's shoulder and spun him around to face you. He looked at you as if he had no idea why you could possibly be pissed right now, feigning innocence as his head tilted to the side quizzically. “You've been rather bold lately, haven't you, dear?” You said sarcastically. The grip on his shoulder becoming tighter with every passing minute
“I don't know what you're talking about~ ” Was the coy answer that rolled off of Izana's tongue, a lie coated in honey that he was hoping you'd fall for. But you had already made up your mind that enough was enough, if you didn't give him a real punishment then he'd never learn and that brattiness would only get worse
Fingers slowly tightened around Izana's tender throat while you spit back, “Yes you fucking do, brat. And I'm getting tired of your cocky attitude.” The glare that you shot at him sent a chill down his spine, goosebumps quickly rising to his skin's surface when Izana realized that he'd gone too far this time. You weren't kidding, you were actually going to punish him for real this time. No gentle spanking or making him suck you off while his hands were tied, whatever you had in mind was going to be intense; he could feel it in his gut
“I've been way too easy on you lately, Izana. I think you need a real punishment, hm?” Your suggestion caused him to gulp, lightly wrapping his fingers around your wrist as your grip tightened, blocking the air flow to his lungs even more. “Strip. Now.”
His mouth opened to protest, but Izana was swiftly cut off by another squeeze around his throat. The hint was obvious enough, he should do what he was fucking told or the punishment would just get worse. So he did, attempting to cover up the nervousness as best as he could, though you're usually pretty perceptive when it comes to him...so you probably already picked up on your partner's true emotions...and you were probably enjoying this right now, grinning as you watched his trembling hands grasp the bottom of his shirt and toss it on the floor
“Now bend over the counter.” Your icy tone made Izana practically shake with every new command, the authority dripping off of every word really did something for him... “I said bend the fuck over.” You yelled while harshly pushing Izana onto the hard surface, a yelp escaping him when bare skin met cold granite. “Spread em.” Was your next command, kicking his feet apart when he didn't move fast enough for your liking. One hand was firmly pressing Izana's head against the counter painfully while you barked another order at your bratty baby, eliciting a tiny sob from him already
“Ow...I-I'm sorry...I won't act like a brat anymore. Promise...” Izana tried to bargain, but you weren't having any of it. Swiftly undoing your belt and sliding your pants down until your cock was free and poking his inner thigh, which earned a little jolt from your boy. “Please baby...I said sorry...”
-
A shrill moan was ripped from Izana as your thick cock rammed his tight ass, the rough pace you'd set caused his earrings to jingle while they hit the countertop repeatedly. He clawed at the hard surface that he'd been pinned to desperately, begging for a break or for you to slow down at least...his third orgasm approaching while your dick pushed against his prostate, milking him fucking dry while your grunts filled his ears
And after another minute or two, he creamed on your cock again, shooting another round of his milky white liquid onto the floor while you impaled him with your dick. Bruises already blooming on his hips from the way your fingers dug into them; an impossibly tight death grip that eliminated any chance of his escape. Even though Izana had basically collapsed from exhaustion, you kept thrusting like an animal while you chased your own release. Using a heavy hand to silence the brat's whining by pushing his face into the counter, finally painting his warm insides with your cum while his legs shook. A dry orgasm hit Izana from the way you slammed your hips into his, emptying the last drops of cum into his sloppy hole before pulling out to admire your work
Izana's legs were practically jelly after the rough fuck, unable to even hold him up anymore. The only thing preventing him from slipping off of the counter and falling onto the floor was your hand still tangled in his silver hair tightly. You smirked at the pitiful sight before you; Izana drooling on the hard surface dumbly, babbling nonstop imsorryimsorryimsorry's until you shushed him, wiping away a tear with your thumb
“Did you learn your lesson this time?” You asked, trailing your fingers along his spine while he nodded frantically. Pleased with his response, a soft smile graced your lips while you released your grip of his hair. Allowing the poor boy to move his head freely now as he stretched his neck. A delicate hold on his hips prevented Izana from falling as you rubbed the sensitive skin apologetically, your gaze softening while you switched into aftercare mode
Immediately, you asked him if he was ok while you helped him straighten up and turn to face you. Your arms snaked around Izana's waist as you pulled him against you, cooing praise after praise while he leaned into your warmth. “It's ok, baby, we're all done. You can relax now.”
“If you're not too sleepy, will you let me take care of you?” Those words immediately caused Izana to perk up, humming as he nodded a ‘yes’ happily. After placing another kiss on the top of his head, you guided your darling to the bathroom and began preparing a nice bath for the two of you. Carefully making sure the water was hot but not scalding, adding a bit of Izana's favorite scented bubble bath and mixing it in before pulling out your softest towels and placing them on the counter for afterwards
“There. It should be ready now, watch your step.” You said, taking Izana's hand and helping him settle in before you climbed in behind him. Both of you immediately relaxed upon sitting in the warm water, sighing at the pleasurable feeling from the enveloping warmth. Izana leaned back against your chest, smiling as your arms wrapped around him protectively
The way you held him close had already calmed him down significantly. The kisses repeatedly placed on his shoulders helped a bit too, if the content giggling from him was any evidence of this fact. Your hands soothed over Izana's pretty brown skin, trailing your fingers over the places where it hurt the most while you whispered your love for him into his ears. “Love you so much, Zana...you were so good for me.”
Izana wanted nothing more than to remain in your embrace forever, alas...you did have to get out of the water eventually...unless you wanted to completely shrivel up, that is. Your boyfriend pouted the entire time you drained the tub and stepped out to wrap yourself in a towel, even though you were about to pamper him like the king he was. The less-than-60-seconds that you weren't hugging his sore body were just awful...
But you really had no problems allowing him this clinginess, especially after being so rough with your darling. He deserved a bit of extra spoiling every now and then anyways
So you treated Izana as if he were a delicate flower tonight; drying him off with gentle pats, making sure you were extra gentle around any bruised areas. Applying a calming scented lotion to his gorgeous skin with all the care in the world while his eyes fluttered closed from your ministrations. Of course you worked in a few kisses during your treatment, connecting his soft lips to yours while your hands rested on his shoulders. And once you had finished with all of that, you pulled him out into the bedroom to dress him in something extra comfy
Slipping one of your shirts over his head and sighing as your scent flooded his nostrils, Izana smiled while he watched you get ready for bed as well. After you had slipped into something comfortable too you crawled into bed with your beloved, letting him cuddle up with you however he wanted to. A content sigh left him as his fingers curled into your shirt tightly, as if he thought you were going to leave him
“Comfy?” You questioned, carding your hands through Izana's soft hair and lightly scratching his scalp. The comforting gesture began to slowly lull your darling to sleep, not before he yawned an ‘mhm’ to your question though. Drifting away soon after in the comfort of your embrace
Your eyes slowly grew heavier while Izana's breathing lulled you into a content slumber as well, mumbling ‘I love you’s in between sleepy kisses to the crown of his head
Tagging: @steadybreadbluebird @6kabuki
#my writing#kinktober#kinktober 2023#tokyo rev smut#tokyo revengers smut#tokyo rev x reader#izana kurokawa#izana smut#izana x reader#sub izana#male reader#dom reader#top reader#oneshot
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distraction - j.p.
a/n: this one's for everyone in my inbox, I see all your messages and I love y'all 😭
synopsis: late night studying very quickly turned into needing a distraction which may come in the form of a fwb!
warnings: mature content, MINORS DNI! unprotected sex (wrap it, then tap it), dom!reader, sub!jordan if you squint lots
word count: 2.6k (writing under 3k is crazy for me)
p.s. it's been ages since I've written something in one night so I genuinely have had no time to consider if this is good or not (oh and this is not proof read)
•••
“You sounded urgent on the phone?” Jordan inquired as you opened the door and grabbed his arm to pull him inside. He’d come over in record time, but it still wasn’t quick enough.
“It is urgent,” you said, putting your hands on his waist and pushing him to sit on your couch. “Have you had sex with anyone recently?”
Your hands were in your hair, carefully moving it to be so it wasn’t in the way. Jordan stared up at you, his eyebrows furrowed and his lips sitting pouted. “What do you mean?”
“It’s a yes or no,” you said, lowering to your knees in front of him, “answer me.” You braced your hands on his thighs and for the first time actually looked him in the eyes since he’d arrived. He’d clearly picked up on your rush and desperation, you could see a familiar sparkle in his eyes, but he still looked deeply confused.
“I haven’t,” he breathed out slowly, “just you.” He gave you a little half smirk and watched as you stood again, sliding into his lap with ease.
His hands immediately went to grip at your hips and you carefully took his glasses off, popping them on the foot stool that was by the arm of the couch. He watched you attentively, waiting for you to be face to face with him again.
“Rough day?” he asked as you ran your hand up his neck to cup his face. You let your thumb brush over his bottom lip and the two of you held eye contact. His eyes not so subtly glanced between your eyes and your lips, his mind wandering off at the sight of your gloss. He couldn’t tell if that was what smelt so good or if it was just you.
“If I stare at my assignment any longer, my head might explode.” You tilted his head slightly and waited to see if he was going to give you any type of resistance or if he was just along for the ride. You took a few moments to look over his face and compose yourself. Less than a minute ago he’d knocked on your apartment door and now you were straddling him on your couch. A lot can happen in 60 seconds.
“I like being your distraction,” he smirked before you leant forward and connected your lips with his.
He met your greedy kiss with the same type of energy straight away, his mouth opening and letting you take control of him. It was rushed and hot, desperation dripping off of you. It felt like the first time all over again, like you weren’t quite sure where to put your hands or what part of him you wanted to feel most. You loved his lips on yours but they could do so much damage wherever they landed. He just knew what to do to drive you insane and as much as that was what you wanted, you needed control.
You pushed on his shoulder as you tried to get some leverage on him and without meaning to, rocked your hips on top of his. He let out a strangled moan and your lips broke away from one another. His arms wrapped around your torso and he buried his face in your neck. The tip of his nose rubbed against the sensitive skin at the nape of your neck while his lips sloppily kissed and grabbed at you.
“Fuck,” he groaned out as you pressed your hips against his again, “you smell so good.”
You weren’t sure if it was what he said or his hot breath on your neck but you needed more contact with him. Your hand went back to his neck and you pushed his head back again. He leant against the back of the couch and seemingly waited for you to kiss him again.
“Take your hoodie off,” you sat back on his lap as you spoke, “shirt too.”
Jordan didn’t make a move straight away so instead you pulled your shirt off. He had this look on his face that almost looked like admiration, it didn’t really make sense considering, but once your shirt was gone he was pulling his hoodie off over his head. He lifted his knees slightly and pulled you closer to him. His hand reached for the back of your bra while he danced his lips across your chest.
“You’re in a mood today,” he mumbled against your collarbone before he let his teeth playfully nip your smooth skin, “I like it.”
You rolled your eyes as he undid your bra and let the straps fall down your arms before tossing it away with the rest of your clothes. You went to say something about how you really didn’t care what he liked but instead were cut off by his lips attaching to your nipple and his large hands palming your tits.
“Shit,” you sighed, “I don’t have all night, J. I got deadlines.” He groaned with your tit still in his mouth before pulling away. You took the chance to lift yourself up to pull the pair of NRL shorts you had on down and Jordan awkwardly pulled his grey sweats off by only lifting his hips off of the couch.
“I need a second,” Jordan took a breath as you sat down on his lap again. He could feel the heat radiating from your core and it was making his heart race. But his hard-on had barely had time to grow, a lot was happening very quickly and he felt like he physically wasn’t at the same place he was mentally.
Knowing Jordan, you spat on your hand and reached under you to pick up his shaft and kissed him again. You licked into his mouth and slowly rubbed your hand against his dick. He let out quiet moans into your mouth and you tried to pull him closer to you. His hands gripped on your ass and thighs and he melted into you.
“Is that enough?” you asked breathlessly between a few soft pecks. Jordan nodded quickly and you let your thumb brush over his tip, collecting the precum he had started to leak.
You smiled at him and popped your thumb in your mouth, tasting him before reaching between the two of you again.
“You don’t need anything?” Jordan asked as you lined his cock up with your opening, “it feels weird not going down on you.”
“Shut up,” you said half playfully as you pushed his face back again. He laughed a little and the two of you shared a smile before you lowered your hips on to him, “you’re a giver, a real gentleman, we get it.”
Sinking on top of him gave you a rush like no other. The slight curve of his tip meant that he always managed to drag against your g-spot when you were on top. It was the easiest way for you to get off and that was part of why it was your favourite way to have Jordan. Not to mention the face time you got meant that the two of you were forced to connect with one another emotionally, not just physically. It was a nice arrangement, it felt right, in the weirdest way.
“God, you feel good baby,” you smiled at Jordan as you braced your hands on his broad shoulders.
Jordan almost missed what you’d said. He had his eyes closed and his eyebrows furrowed and seemed to be really concentrating. And he was. Over and over again in his head he was repeating the same words: don’t bust quick. This wasn’t the first time he’d been inside of you without protection, but it had been a few weeks since the two of you had hooked up and feeling how wet and hot you were was not helping his case. You were paradise, but he was here for you and had to at least try and last a decent amount of time before he let go.
“God damn,” he cussed when his eyes met yours, “I might just be infatuated with you after all this.”
“Oh you best be,’ you grinned as you leant up to kiss him again. It was just a quick peck, but Jordan made it clear he was expecting more. “Quiet now, Pretty boy, I’m tryna do something.”
Your arms wrapped around his shoulders and you pulled your hips up, feeling him drag against your walls before pushing yourself back down again. The first few times were more to feel him, you wanted it to be nice and slow just to drive him a little bit crazy. It was clearly working too, he was hissy in your ear and gripping your hips tight, though he made no move to take over.
Once your speed picked up, he offered some assistance but you were completely in control. You moved your body against him, feeling every inch of his dick and getting lost in the sounds you were pulling out of him. The air was thick with your arousal and the sounds of your ass against his thighs.
“Oh my god,” you called out loudly as you felt his head twitch inside you. You paused your hips and gripped Jordan’s shoulders again, digging your nails into his skin, before you rolled your hips to get some traction for you.
“I’m not gonna cum,” Jordan choked out, his head leaning back and his eyes focused on the ceiling. You smirked and rolled your hips again which sent a jolt through his body. “I’m not ruining this for you baby, just give me a second.”
You giggled a little and rolled your hips again, seeing the exact same reaction from him, “you’re not ruining anything honey,” you cooed. He made eye contact with you briefly but that sent another jolt through his body and he pulled his eyes back to the ceiling.
“If you wanna cum you can,” you said sweetly, your lips leaning down to kiss his heaving chest. You dragged your lips up his pecs and left opened mouthed kisses trailing up to his neck. “Nothing’s stopping me tonight.”
Very carefully you sucked the skin below his ear lobe, pulling a throaty groan from him. You only pulled away when you were sure you’d left a little mark and blew cool air on it. You’d always wanted to leave your mark on him, a part of you interested to see how the internet would react and the other feeling proud that you could get a big name like Jordan Poole acting like a lost boy.
“You’re a fucking problem,” he groaned as your eyes connected again, his moment of weakness clearly having passed.
“You thought this was gonna be easy?” you teased with a smile. He reacted by smacking your ass before tightening his grip on your hips.
Again, you pulled yourself up and started to rock against him at a steady rhythm. Your words had seemingly relaxed Jordan and he was just gonna let whatever happen. It was just about you now and you accepted that with a smile.
Feeling him twitch against your walls sent hot flashes throughout your body. Your g-spot was being stimulated more and more with each passing moment. You hadn’t noticed but the heat coming off of his raging tip added an extra sensation to your experience. Usually at a time like this you’d pull away from whoever and get them to play with your clit or you’d do it yourself, but this was a better feeling. You were getting wetter the more you worked to get it just right.
“I’m about to cum,” you let out between pants and you adjusted your legs quickly to make it easier to go quicker. The new angle put your tits in Jordan’s face and he immediately started to give them attention, driving you closer to the edge.
“Your clit,” Jordan suddenly said between movements, “does it need-shit.” He cut himself off as something like lightning struck through him again.
“Cum inside me J,” you encouraged, your own head being thrown back as you moved quickly. You were burning up and were hyper aware of his every touch. He’d never finished inside before but it felt like the right moment, you didn’t want to part ways with him and you wanted to feel him come undone.
“Gah, are you sure?” his puppy dog eyes found yours for a second, he needed proper confirmation.
“You’re not allowed to pull out,” you argued back, “shit, shit, shit.”
You pushed Jordan’s shoulders back again and used every instinct you had to ride on top of him. He spurted out a loud string of cuss words and inaudible claims as he let his head fall back against the couch. You felt him twitch inside and waves of heat flow through you. The sounds coming from your bodies was becoming louder, wetter, and you knew you were almost there. You changed your movements slightly so there was more friction in your movements and you knew you were done.
“You look so fucking good right now,” Jordan choked out, “you’re gonna cum, aren’t you?”
Even in his fucked-out blissful state, Jordan found your clit blindly and fumbled to rub it just to give you a little more stimulation. He knew it was what was going to send you over and like magic, your name was falling from his lips mixed with loud moans. You came on top of him, your sex mixing with his and making more of a mess between your thighs. You rode out your high, your body arching and legs fighting to stay open.
After the final jolt, you let yourself relax against Jordan’s chest. You could hear his heart beating rapidly and it made you laugh a little. You weren’t sure how long you sat there with him still inside you. It was definitely longer than the time it took for him to walk in your front door for you to get him naked.
“When’s your deadline?” he asked, breaking the silence and pulling you out of your little dreamworld.
“Tomorrow morning at 9am,” you replied, glancing at the clock behind him. “Why?”
He checked his own watch quickly before brushing some of your hair out of your face, “I’m stickin’ around until everything’s done. Just in case you need this again, or someone to talk to.”
Someone to talk to, that was how this whole situationship had started up. One night he’d just been around past midnight and suddenly you were making out with him, and then you were naked, and then he was asking where you keep your condoms. Life comes at you fast sometimes.
“I guess you can stick around, you’ve probably got clothes here anyways.” You kissed him quickly and smiled before carefully standing up, still on the couch. Unexpectedly, Jordan gave your hand a kiss before helping you get down safely. You pulled him up and the two of you walked to the bathroom, grabbing a few cloths from your linen cupboard along the way.
“You should be like that more often,” Jordan commented from the shower while you were sitting on the toilet. He was just turning the hot water on when you made eye contact with him.
“Like what?”
“Y’know,” he smirked, “in charge. It’s hot, I like it.”
You rolled your eyes and stood up from the toilet, checking to make sure you weren’t going to leak anymore if you put on a clean pair of pj pants.
“I’m going back to my assignment,” you said after washing your hands, “I’ll call on you if I need another distraction.”
“I’ll be ready,” he smirked and saluted you before you stepped out, pulling the door closed behind you.
#minors dni#jordan poole#jordan poole fics#jordan poole smut#jordan poole imagine#nba fics#v writes#jp#jp13
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Break up Geto
Angst, mention of death, no gender mention
Geto has been colder lately, ever since the girl in his custody died he has become very thoughtful and unfriendly despite all your efforts to make him smile. You moved in with him to be close to him and never leave him alone with his thoughts because that's the only thing you can do.
One morning as you woke up alone in bed you reach the living room, seeing him sitting on the couch, not bothering to look at you. “We should end this” Geto says, gazing at the clouds lazily drifting by the window. You’re sitting beside him now, wearing his shirt, shocked. “There’s no reason to delay the inevitable.”
Because any relationship he’s in isn’t meant to last. Not in his line of work. You may as well be dating a dead man walking. He’s clung to you for so long in search for any sense of normalcy. "W-what? Why?" Geto takes a long drag of his cigarette before replying. "You really need me to tell you why?" He knows you're not that naive. That you don't actually need him to spell it out for you. "Yes. Yes, i do." He puts the cigarette out in the nearby ashtray, exhaling a long breath. "You already know why" he says, his voice taking on a tired edge. And you knew you did. "Because I'm a sorcerer. Because I can't offer you anything permanent. Because I can't give you the life you want. You know all this." "I want you. I don't want anything less and anything more." He laughs, harsh and biting. "You're being naive." His gaze flicks over to you, eyes narrowing. "You can't tell me you're perfectly fine with me coming home with bloody clothes. That you feel comfortable with the fact that any given day could be my last."
He exhales, looking away again. "Hell, do you even understand what you're saying? You're really okay with the thought of spending every waking moment in fear about a future you can't control? Being constantly, painfully reminded of how temporary I am?"
"I will never stop thinking of you anyway. I'll make you live every moment, every day, every week. I'll be by your side because you choose to be a sorcerer and i choosed to be with you."
"You-" Geto cuts himself off as he processes your words, stunned by your determination. He knew you'd be stubborn about it, but this was not what he had expected. "Are you hearing what you're saying? Do you have any idea what it even means to date a sorcerer?"
"I love you, Suguru. And i know that you feel the same. I can cross the street and risk it anyway. So what, we shouldnt go other roads just because something can happen?" He growls, frustrated by your tenacity. "It's not the same." He can't believe he even has to explain this. "When you cross the street, it's a calculated risk. You weigh the odds, you assess your surroundings, and you make a choice. But with me? With us?"
He leans in, his eyes intense. "The odds are always stacked against us. It's a matter of when, not if something bad happens. Can you live with that?"
"Yes. And you?"
"You're being foolish" Geto mutters, shaking his head. But he's already wavering in his resolve. He can feel it in the way his heart beats faster in his chest, the way his throat feels tight. He's weak to you, and he can't stand how much you'll mean his downfall.
He closes his eyes. "We'll never have a normal life" he tells you, his voice a ragged whisper. "We'll never have a future. Can you accept that?"
"If we will get married or have kids and one day it will be finished then we will figure it out. But for now i don't want you to tell me to broke up. I want to hear from you if you love me or not. Geto opens his eyes, his gaze fierce. "Of course I love you" he says, his voice rough with emotion. "I've loved you for a long time now. But-"
He sighs, frustrated and conflicted. "You need to understand what you're signing up for. This won't be some fairytale romance. It'll be hard, and it'll be painful, and it'll be dangerous. Can you really handle that?" " I don't want you to face everything alone. I'll be here with you no matter what." Geto tenses as you move to sit on his lap, his instincts telling him to push you away. But he knows that would be pointless. You're here to stay, and he can't find the willpower to make you leave.
"You're a damn fool" he mutters, not quite able to look you in the eye. "You're going to get yourself hurt." "I'll not let you suffer alone." Geto can't help the bitter laugh that escapes him when he hears your words. "You can't protect me" he says, resigned to your stubbornness. "I can take care of myself. That's not the issue here. The issue is you, putting yourself in harm's way for my sake."
He tilts your chin up, forcing you to look at him. "I don't want you to get hurt. I can't let you get hurt." "I'll not end up hurt, i do a normal job" "It doesn't matter" He insists, growing more frustrated by the second. "You're underestimating the danger you'd be in just by being with me. The things I've seen, the things I've done- you have no idea the kind of people I've tangled with. They wouldn't hesitate to use you against me. Can you honestly say you're prepared to face something like that?" "I Won't let you leave me and face everything by yourself, got It?" Geto lets out an exasperated breath, his hand still holding your chin in place. He wants to shake you, to make you understand the implications of your choice. But he knows it's futile. You're as stubborn as he is, and just as determined.
He brings his forehead down to meet yours, his eyes squeezed shut. "You're impossible" he mutters, the last remnants of his resolve crumbling. "How can I possibly resist you when you're this damn stubborn?" He lifts his head back up, staring into your eyes. "You understand what you're signing up for, then? You know this won't be easy. You're prepared to face danger, pain, heartbreak?"
He waits for your answer. He knows what it will be, but he needs to hear it from you. He needs to know that you're not taking this lightly. "Yes, yes, absolutely yes. I want to be by your side." Geto searches your eyes for a long moment, looking for any hint of doubt. But all he finds is certainty. Damned it.
"Fine" he grumbles, pulling you close. "Don't blame me when you eventually regret this."
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu geto#geto suguru#jjk suguru#getou suguru x reader#jujutsu kaisen suguru#jjk geto#geto x reader
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we said hello and your eyes look like coming home (23/?)
Summary: A canon-divergent AU where the bond snaps for Rhys on Calanmai, Feyre unwittingly accepts it, and Fire Night magic proves to be more transformative than anyone bargained for. Feyre drags a mate she hardly knows out from Under the Mountain, then puts him back together as war with Hybern approaches. Warnings: dubious consent, canon-typical sexual violence, canon-typical violence Rating: Explicit Chapter Word Count: ~4k
ch. 1 - 10 | ch. 11-20 | ch. 21 - i wouldn't marry me either | ch. 22 - burn all the files, desert all your past lives | ch. 23 - i've still got love for you
Some text in this chapter is lifted directly from ACOTAR book one.
I am also over the moon and insanely honored to share that there is now ART OF THE FIRST CHAPTER OF THIS FIC!!!!! It's by the love of my life Amnevitah, and you can go make heart eyes at it and tell her she's wonderful over here on her tumblr (warning that it's mildly NSFW).
Read on AO3 or you can find the twenty-third chapter below the readmore.
It was nearly midnight when I made my way to Nesta's bedroom in a borrowed nightgown, late enough that the servants were gone and Elain was sound asleep. I knocked on the door once, and she ushered me inside without a word.
Like the rest of the manor, Nesta's bedroom was full of furniture fit for a palace and utterly devoid of personal touches. It might as well have been a guest room.
I hovered near the door and watched Nesta open a hidden compartment in the writing desk near the window. She pulled something out and placed it on a side table. I stepped closer to get a better look.
A chunk of wood. The edges were rough, as if it had been ripped from something. I started to ask her where it had come from, but when I spotted the tangle of vines I'd painted on it, I understood.
"I had to watch as Father and Elain went from sobbing hysterics into nothing. I had to listen to them talk about how lucky it was for you to be taken to some made-up aunt’s house, how some winter wind had shattered our door. And I thought I’d gone mad—but every time I did, I would look at that painted part of the table, then at the claw marks farther down, and know it wasn’t in my head. So tell me everything and leave none of it out," Nesta said quietly, sinking down into the chair by the desk.
My heart broke to think what she'd gone through—what Tamlin had put her through. His lies to me might have been in service of saving his people, but there was no reason for my sister's sanity to be collateral damage. Tamlin had paid my father off, then washed his hands of the matter without bothering to ensure that his glamour had worked.
It was sloppy and thoughtless, and not for the first time, I wondered how many people ultimately would have died if I'd stayed in the Spring Court a moment longer.
I sat on the bed, tucking my feet under me, and started at the beginning. The very beginning, fifty years ago when Rhys had gone to that damned party and Amarantha had taken over.
I'd barely gotten a few words out when Nesta was already interrupting. "Is your High Lord too stupid to employ poison-testers?"
"I…I don't think any of them do, actually."
"It seems Prythian is ruled by idiots, then. Perhaps that explains why this Rhysand married you."
"You know nothing about what Rhys has been though," I hissed, clenching my teeth so I didn't yell the words and wake up Elain.
Nesta waved a hand, an elegant, dismissive gesture. "Then continue."
So I did. And to Nesta's credit, she listened intently, her lips pressed together in a thin line, as I described the curse, my arrival in Prythian, and those early days in the Spring Court.
Somehow, it calmed something within me to tell the whole tale again now that I knew everything. I wasn't used to having a confidant, and I couldn't remember a time before this that speaking to Nesta had felt like a lightening a burden.
It was strange, but not unwelcome.
I braced myself when I started to describe my first meeting with Rhys on Calanmai. Nesta had once sneered at me for rutting in the barn with Isaac Hale—I was sure she'd have some choice words about a mating frenzy that had taken place in a cave.
But she merely furrowed her brow and said, "Your marriage was….arranged, then? By the stag?"
I nearly snapped and told her no—I'd specifically told Rhys not to marry me, after all. And Nesta knew he wasn't my husband. But…she'd never feel the pull of a mating bond for herself, and the concept was completely foreign to her. Perhaps this was the way to make her understand.
"By the Mother herself. The stag merely…cleared our path to each other. I'm not sure what would have happened if it didn't, but I think it probably saved us quite a lot of heartbreak, in the end."
"That's such an odd way to speak about a man you've been shackled to against your will," she said, shaking her head.
The Inner Circle had also been horrified when they'd realized I'd accepted the bond without knowing what I was doing. If even Nesta was worried about it…perhaps there was something wrong with me for not being more distressed. But even though I'd had to go Under the Mountain for Rhys, I still felt profoundly lucky that everything I could possibly want had just been dropped into my lap on Calanmai.
I shrugged. "There's no reason to be upset when I would have chosen him for myself anyway." That was the truth at the center of everything.
There was a flicker of understanding, and—if I wasn't mistaken—relief in Nesta's eyes. "And I take it he feels the same?"
"Yes."
"Good." There was an edge to her voice, and I wondered what she would have said if my answer had been no.
There was still so much to tell her, so I continued, describing my arrival at the Night Court—though I didn't mention Velaris, merely said that Rhys had directed me to a warded home. Nesta didn't ask about the tattoo the magic had given me, just scowled at my left hand. She said nothing about my immortality either, instead interrogating me about the Inner Circle and their ranks and roles and relations to Rhys.
They were, perhaps, the sort of questions I should have asked on that first day. But unlike me, Nesta knew how to get the lay of a land in a noble court and assess her place in it.
If my eldest sister were dropped in the Court of Nightmares, I had no doubt she'd be running it within a day.
I hadn't spoken about Under the Mountain at length with anyone but Rhys before that night, and getting the words out under Nesta's uncompromising steel glare was difficult. My sister and I weren't linked through mating bond and shared experience. My voice shook, and at points I felt faintly sick, but I managed to tell her everything.
Even with Rhys…I'd needed to hold back. My own few weeks Under the Mountain paled in comparison to his decades there alone, and I knew on some level, even though I'd never voiced it aloud, that he'd had it worse than me. Without even realizing it, I'd been carrying around a prickly sort of guilt over that.
Once, I would have spent several days with a paintbrush in hand until I'd gotten those feelings out, but since I could barely stand to look at a canvas anymore, it all had been festering inside of me.
So to my immense embarrassment, I cried in front of Nesta.
For once, she didn't say anything harsh, just wordlessly handed me a handkerchief. I didn't mind—it would be strange for her to coddle me. Instead, she pretended nothing was amiss as I wiped at my eyes and finished the rest of the story, all the way through my trip to Illyria and the Weaver's cottage and the attacks on the temples.
At the end of it, Nesta merely said, "This is all the more reason you shouldn't come back here again."
I could see her logic, but that didn't make it any less a kick in the teeth. "Elain and Father deserve proper goodbyes."
"It's too much of a risk," she said, eyes flashing dangerously. It would be ugly if I tried to fight her on this; Nesta, who had once put herself in front of Elain and left me to the beast that broke into our cabin, would always protect our middle sister, even if that meant casting me aside.
I should have been used to that by now, but it still hurt.
"Then at least allow the sentries around the manor to stay. There are far too many fae who would wish us harm, and their numbers will only increase if war breaks out like we fear."
"As long as the sentries keep their distance."
They would, but of course Nesta had no reason to be sure of that. A thought struck me. "They answer to Cassian, Rhys's general. I could send him to meet with you and discuss the specifics, if that would ease your mind."
I expected Nesta to balk at interacting with any more faeries, but she asked, "Does he listen to orders?"
"He will if you give them. My position as Lady of Night makes you and Elain something akin to princesses in Prythian." Mor had explained it to me once, though I wasn't interested enough to remember the details about ranks and noble titles. It would matter to Nesta, though.
She nodded once, then stared down at her hands, which were folded in her lap. "Thank you," she said, a bit more softly, "and for what it's worth, this is easier, knowing you've gotten everything you deserve. After that beast took you away, it's a relief, truly, to know that Rhysand loves you and is keeping you safe."
I stilled. It was beyond a doubt the kindest thing Nesta had ever said to me. I hadn't thought she'd cared at all what had become of me in Prythian.
"Elain said—said that you tried to visit me," I said, my throat so tight I barely got the words out.
"I got to the Wall. I couldn't find a way through."
“You trekked two days there and two days back—through the winter woods?”
“I hired that mercenary from town to bring me a week after you were taken. With the money from your pelt. She was the only one who seemed like she would believe me.”
“You did that—for me?” Rhys was the only person in the world that I'd truly believed would bother, and no matter how much he loved me, a mating bond made everything different. Mor had tried to soften the truth on my first day in the Night Court, but even she had admitted the Inner Circle was duty-bound to protect their High Lord's mate, and I'd only become their friend later.
"What Tamlin did to you—it wasn't right. None of it was right."
Nesta finally met my gaze, and for once, the fire in her blue-grey eyes wasn't intended to burn me. We weren't drowning anymore—the lifeline of her anger was unnecessary now, and she knew it. In her darkened bedroom in a too-clean manor, we'd found just enough safety that she'd let me know she cared.
Underneath it all, Nesta cared, more deeply and loyally than I'd been able to comprehend.
There were no words for that. I launched myself at her, and Nesta went stiff in my arms as I embraced her. She didn't hug me back, just…patted my upper back awkwardly after a moment. I didn't mind—that was downright affectionate from her.
I pulled away and said, "If I'm unable to return here, will— will I at least be able to write?"
"Is there a way to ensure your correspondence stays private?"
I caught the meaning behind that—Nesta was confident in her own ability to keep a secret, but she knew too little about my own situation to be sure I could do the same. It wouldn't have crossed my mind—after all, I hadn't even learned to read until Rhys ensured I was taught—but my sister had been expected to marry a prince one day. She'd been trained for a life where sensitive letters falling into the wrong hands could cause a reputation-ruining scandal.
She was right to ask, though, so I explained how paper spelled to vanish was used to pass messages across Prythian. And by some miracle…she agreed to let me leave some with her.
"Rhys can deliver it tonight, if that's alright," I said; I'd feel better knowing it was in her hands when I left. Nesta nodded her assent. "Give me a moment to ask him, then."
Ignoring the grimace Nesta made as my gaze went distant, I gave the gentlest tug on the bond I could. I was still met with a wave of blind protectbitemaimkill panic the moment Rhys's shields dropped. He hadn't expected to hear from me until morning.
All is well, I said, reaching for the beast. I could feel its hackles rising in the back of my mind.
With a mental hand, I scratched a sensitive spot on its chin, right under the maw with its rows and rows of razor-sharp teeth, the thing that threatened to gobble up sleeping fae in their nightmares. Its eyes closed at my touch, and it purred like an affectionate cat.
Nothing's amiss. I just have a favor to ask, I added.
Anything. You know that, he said. I was dimly aware of a spiral of anxiety—some sort of fear that I didn't know that. Stroking the beast's flank like it was a nervous horse, I kicked the worry away.
If it's not too much trouble, could you please bring us some of the enchanted paper you use for correspondence? I'd like to make sure Nesta has a way to contact me directly.
Talons shifted into fingers that gently tucked an errant strand of my hair behind my ear. There's no such thing as too much trouble where you're concerned. Call for me again when you want me there.
Thank you. Just as I'd kicked away his concern, I felt his claw shred my lingering discomfort at asking him to do something on my behalf.
His mind began to pull away from mine, but he stopped halfway. Are you sure you're alright? The emotions on your side of the bond seem to be…churning.
I hesitated. There was no point in lying, but I was tempted to say we'd talk about it later. I didn't want him to worry any further, either. For now, I could give Rhys the bare minimum. I learned that Nesta tried to go to the Wall and bring me back after I was taken. She wasn't able to get through, though.
An image flashed across the bond before Rhys could stop it—a female with his pointed ears, violet eyes, and massive wingspan. She was standing on one of the footbridges that spanned the Sidra, her head thrown back in raucous laughter and the lights of the Rainbow sparkling behind her. A happy memory, but at the same time, it felt like looking at a painful, howling void.
Another younger sister whose elder sibling hadn't been able to save her. But unlike me, she didn't have a mate who'd eventually swooped in and brought her to safety.
I'll see you soon, Rhys said, then dropped his shields before I had a chance to respond.
Nesta quickly pinned her hair up and changed into a gown, but I didn't bother. Regardless, it gave Rhys time to pass through the Wall again. When she assured me she was ready, I gave another light tug on the bond.
Rhys appeared with nothing more than a gust of night-kissed wind so gentle it barely made the curtains flutter. He held a small, black-and-silver box in one hand, identical to one I'd seen holding blank paper on his desk in the House of Wind. He'd had the good sense to hide his wings, and the leash on his power was tighter than I'd ever felt it.
Even when he subdued himself, Rhys still felt too enormous and otherworldly for this side of the Wall. Between the night still clinging to him and the width of his obnoxiously broad shoulders, he seemed to take up the whole room.
And yet, as if he were an entirely normal person and none of the current circumstances were bizarre, he pressed a chaste kiss to my cheek and said, "Hello, Feyre darling."
To her credit, Nesta didn't flinch. Or hiss at him. Which already meant this was going better than I'd anticipated.
Before either of them could make this worse, I said, "This is my sister, Nesta Archeron. Nesta, this is my mate, Rhysand."
To my shock Rhys bent at the waist and bowed—actually bowed—to my sister. Polite and graceful, his upbringing as a crown prince on full display and all signs of the Illyrian warrior hidden.
Nesta's face was frozen in a mask of cold indifference. "No surname?" she said, and those two words were enough to let a nasty implication hang in the air—that Rhys wasn't pedigreed, despite being a High Lord.
His mother had been a seamstress, after all. If I didn't know better, I would have thought Nesta could smell that on him.
Rhys didn't blink. "Archeron. Or at least, it will be when we're ready to make the mating bond public knowledge."
It was a small miracle I caught myself before my mouth gaped open in surprise; he hadn't told me he'd intended to take my name. A glimmer of wicked amusement and a twinge of pride floated down the bond towards me.
Nesta, however, just cocked her head like she was sizing up an opponent, almost exactly the way Cassian did in the training ring. "I won't be mocked in my own home. You can leave."
"I'd rather be known as Feyre's mate than my father's son," Rhys said, picking invisible lint off his tunic in a gesture that was clearly calculated to look as nonchalant as possible. "I'm not mocking you. Feyre is an infinitely better person than he ever was."
Nesta went quiet. I wondered if it was as strange for her as it was for me to hear someone call me good and mean it. Rhys glanced at me, his expression melting into something soft for a moment, and Nesta tracked his movement like a hawk.
Before the silence stretched long enough to become awkward, Rhys held the box of stationery out to her and added, "This is for you."
Nesta flicked her hand towards the writing desk, an imperiousness gesture of a queen directing a servant. "Top drawer on the left," she said. An order, not a request.
She was testing him, I realized. Or had thrown down a gauntlet. Maybe both. Whatever was happening between Nesta and Rhys was some sort of courtier bullshit I was too feral to understand. Rhys did as she said, and I wasn't sure if that meant he'd lost or conceded something.
Regardless, there was no reason for Rhys to linger—and I suspected my sister would bite his head off if he tried. He said something blandly polite to Nesta about it being a pleasure to finally meet her, kissed my cheek again, and winnowed away.
When he was gone, I looked at Nesta expectantly and braced myself for whatever cutting remark was coming. She was already grimacing as if he'd tracked mud all over the floor.
My chest squeezed. Not that I needed anyone's approval, but as mates, Rhys's and my coupling had been had been quite literally blessed by the Mother herself. And I'd spent years shrugging off Nesta's scornful comments about damn near every choice I made.
I shouldn't have cared what she thought. But…for whatever reason, in this matter, I did.
"You two are so besotted with each other, it's disgusting," Nesta spat. It was congratulations enough.
I smiled. "You aren't the first person to say that about us."
There wasn't much else to discuss after that. Nesta and I sat in silence together as we burned the chunk of wood from the table in the fireplace in her bedroom. I felt something settle between us as the last piece of the cabin that she'd been holding onto was reduced to ash.
I returned to my room and managed a few hours of sleep before slipping out of the manor before dawn without saying goodbye. Before bed, Elain had said to bring the paints that she'd bought for me back to Aunt Ripleigh's, so I took them with and left her the first thank you note I'd ever managed to write by myself.
It was easier to go without facing either of my sisters again.
When I met Rhys in the woods, I threw myself at him so forcefully that he stumbled back a few steps and nearly hit a tree. "I missed you too," he said, hooking an arm under my knees as he scooped me up to fly.
Something about being in the mortal lands again—or if I was truly honest, being around my family again—had reawakened that stupid, childish part of me that wanted to cry out until I was fussed over. A bit embarrassed, I pressed my face to his chest and wished I could scent him like a faerie. But instead, all I could smell was the laundry soap we both used. Maybe that was better than nothing.
"It was a long night," I said, and he pressed a kiss to my temple.
The world faded to smoke and shadow, and then I felt that peculiar sense of being torn in two for the space of a heartbeat as we passed through the Wall. Rhys could have winnowed us again, but he continued flying above the sea for a while, probably to get the practice in to strengthen his wings.
Being cradled, his warmth and nearness, the rhythm of wingbeats, the salt air…it soothed me. Dawn was breaking, turning the sky and the sea golden. Rhys, painfully beautiful as always, was positively glowing in the light; his skin was returning to a healthy brown, the unnatural paleness from years underground almost gone. I wanted to paint it.
"With Nesta, why were you so…" I said, then trailed off, unsure of the right word. Rhys's whole demeanor had been subdued, but there had been more to it than just that. Now that I thought about it… "You didn't smirk once. That's not like you."
His face was solemn. "If my sister had inadvertently accepted a mating bond, I'd expect her mate to have his tail between his legs when she brought him home to meet me."
Once, I would have scoffed at the idea Nesta cared at all about how a man or male treated me. But she'd tried to save me. If Rhys had seemed at all like a threat, then…Nesta would have faced down the Lord of Nightmares to get me back.
I still didn't quite know what to make of that.
"Would you have tried to get my father's blessing if he'd been there?"
"Cauldron, no. You're your own person and make your own choices." He sounded affronted I'd even suggest it.
"Then why be so restrained around Nesta?"
"I don't like being thought of as an ill-mannered brute."
I could imagine how often insults like that had been flung at him for being Illyrian, probably from people just as adept as sneering down their noses as Nesta was. And yet, even though I knew Rhys well, it was still a bit strange to hear from a faerie when so many of his kind considered humans to be half-wild beasts below their notice.
Strange, but…not unwelcome.
"For what it's worth, you're not all ill-mannered brute at all," I said, smiling, "but you are a prick, though."
Rhys's wicked grin was the only warning before he gripped me tighter and tilted us into a barrel roll so swift and dizzying that I would have emptied the contents of my stomach if I'd eaten. I screamed, but the wind tore the words away.
He laughed, and it was impossible to snap an irritated response when the joy was so plain on his face. We settled into a smooth glide.
"We need to winnow the rest of the way back soon," he said once the roaring wind died down. "Cassian wants to spar, and if you're late for training, Az will ensure you pay for it."
I wouldn't expect anything less. We faded into the morning mist, and when the Night Court materialized around us, I'd never been happier to be home again.
#feysand#feyre archeron#we said hello and your eyes look like coming home#this cheeky little update before Elucien Week is for the girlies who love Rhys AND Nesta <3
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Conversations recently have reminded just how far I've come. Not just within myself but in my choice of friends. That I'm no longer so scared of being alone or being disliked that I'm strong enough to not immediately accept anyone who wants to talk to me as a friend. That I can protect myself against those who would do me harm.
It allows me the time and energy to actually enjoy the good people in my life. Because the bad would demand so much of my time and attention I had nothing left for the good ones. But the good ones make it easy to share my time with them all because I know I can just be myself around them. I just want to gather you up in my arms and give you a big hug.
I've been looking at some of the people I used to give my time to and I have zero regrets of cutting ties with any of them. Even if at the time it was the hardest thing I'd ever done.
There was Kat who insisted I was her absolute best friend that wasn't her in person best friend. Yet she would only talk to me if she had no one else to talk to. She barely acknowledged me in public and didn't involve me in anything ever. We broke things off when I'd been having an extremely rough night, like sobbing alone at my computer bad. She'd been out drinking that night and started talking at me. When I told her I was upset she told me I should smoke some weed about it. The next day when she was sober I told her that wasn't cool and she got pissed at me. I haven't spoken to her since.
There was Azura who collected people to be her emotional harem. I was the oldest in her personal server by like a decade, which made me uncomfortable already. But the youngest was like 11, which deeply concerned me. When there wasn't enough attention on her, she'd suddenly get upset and start implying she was having suicidal thoughts. I don't take those things lightly so I would be deeply worried about her. I had many late or sleepless nights trying to be there for her, talking her through things. But it got to a point that I could predict when she would start doing it even if she seemed perfectly fine in the moment. Then when I caused too much trouble, she kicked me out of the server. The trouble being I was upset that another person would pester me constantly in DMs after repeatedly telling her to not DM me. And she was constantly trying to force me into non-con roleplay scenarios that halfway through she would try to turn into some sort of weird fluffy romance. She said I wasn't saying "no" forcefully enough because she had ADHD. Azura took her side.
Then there was Beth. The last vestige of my poor choices. I only just cut her off about a month ago. She only really talked to me if she needed someone to compliment her art or if she needed someone to talk at. Another friend said our conversations read like I was trying to talk to an AI they were so weirdly one-sided. Funnily enough, Ghost was the pebble that started the avalanche that ended it all. I was trying harder to talk about stuff I liked in an attempt to make things less one-sided. She basically said "meh" and made the conversation super serious about her in a completely unrelated topic. When I voiced my frustrations about how she treated me, she had the fucking audacity of saying I was making the conversation about me. Which really proved we were only ever allowed to talk about her. And this was all after I'd given her a second chance. Previously we'd gone several months without talking because she'd wildly mis-interpreted my words and decided to hold me secretly responsible for what she decided I'd actually meant. She'd taken "Are you sure that's a good idea?" (context being: not waiting longer for something) and she assumed I meant "You're going to fail." She didn't actually TELL me this, she just didn't respond to me for several days. She already knew I refused to tolerate silent treatment bullshit.
I've been through dozens of "friendships" like this. Toxic beyond all reason. In a way it makes me angry that I allowed myself to be used in so many different ways. But these are old scars. They no longer actually hurt most of the time. They're just a reminder of the shit I've been through. And remembering them makes me so grateful for the amazing friends and people I know today.
Just remember that friends are supposed to lift you up. Not make you dread your chat app notification sound. If thinking about a friend doesn't make your heart feel warm, if you're the sort that gets feelings like that. Friends should make you feel like wrapping up in a cozy blanket on a cold day just thinking about them. They should feel like a cool autumn breeze after a long hot summer. They should make you feel like life is worth living.
If someone insists they're your friend, consider whether they make your life better just by existing in it. Because I promise you, people who claim to be friends who don't do that are not your friends. They're not worth the time they demand of you. Find people who will be a warm light (or comforting darkness if you're into that) instead of people who sink their claws into.
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YOU BELONG WITH ME
I stand by the window and watch him talking to his girlfriend. She's upset. She probably didn't understand the joke he told her and took it personally.
Again.
‘Cause she doesn’t get your humor like I do.
Taylor Swift's song plays in my headphones. Definitely not the type of music she would like. Too girly. Which is weird, because of the two of us, she's the one who acts girlish while I'm the complete opposite.
So here I am - Katniss Everdeen in love with her best friend Peeta Mellark, who is dating the beautiful Julia Collins.
I sigh and rest my chin on the windowsill when I hear the sound of the new message.
Let's go out somewhere. Please.
15:36
I smile to myself and look out the window to see him with his phone in his hand.
kpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkp
We are walking down the road to the park. Peeta is wearing his worn-out jeans, in which he looks so handsome. But I cannot stop thinking this is how it has to be.
Peeta and me. And no one else.
And I'm just more sure about this when I finally see his beautiful and shine smile, but then he gets massage and everything is gone.
"Are you alright?," I ask.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm good," he answers, but I don't believe him.
Hey, what you doing with a girl like that?
And for the next time I'm compering myself with her. She wars short skirts and high heels, while I'm wearing normal T-shirts and sneakers. She's cheer captain and I'm on the bleachers.
And what makes me more sad and my eyes are starting getting tearly. I'm dreaming of the day when he wakes up and find that what's he's looking for has been here the whole time and she has him now. Maybe forever.
And that makes me lie to Peeta and go back to home. Of course with him, because she would never let me go back to home alone when I'm not feeling well. Actually he never lets me go back home alone.
kpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpkpk
I'm half asleep when I hear something knocking to my window. I open my eyes and see him. I'm shocked but I open the window and let him go inside.
"What the hell are you doing, Peeta?!," I yell at him but not so loud, so I won't wake up Prim or mom.
"I have to talk with you," he says.
I'm about yelling at him even more, but then I see his eyes filled with tears and my heart is broken.
"What happened, Peeta?," I ask and get him to hug me, and he wraps his arms around my waist tightly and clings to my shoulder, so I can easily run my fingers through his soft hair soothingly.
"I'm no longer with Julia," he answers and I want to cry and celebrate at the same time.
But then I'm angry.
"She broke up with you?," I scream loudly, not caring that it's late at night.
Peeta pulls away from me, surprised by my outburst, and strokes my arms soothingly to relax me. He's touch distracts me and leaves behind hot marks that burn me and make me focus only on his rough, strong hands.
"Actually, I did it."
This shocks me even more.
"I broke up with her, Katniss."
"Why?," I manage to choke out.
He doesn't answer right away, so I suggest he sit down and cool down while I make him some tea.
As I go downstairs, I thank heaven that my scream didn't wake anyone else but this old cat that I've had to cook for years
Good for you, I think.
I prepare two cups of warm drink for me and Peeta and go back upstairs to join him.
"Here," I give him the dish and he puts it on the windowsill next to my bed.
"Okay, you don't want to drink," I mutter to myself, "So you wanted to talk about something." I remind him his words.
He looks up at me and slowly gets out of bed, walking towards me. He took the cup from my hands and set it next to his, then took my hands in his.
"I broke up with Julia," he finally says, looking into my eyes and rubbing my knuckles.
"I know," I can't say more.
"But it's not everything," he says mysterious. Then he does something I don't expect.
He kisses me. First, he gently takes my face in his hands and lightly presses his lips to mine. However, when he feels me kissing him back, he starts kissing me harder and more greedily. He licks my lips, asking for entrance, which I mindlessly allow. His hand goes from my cheek to my waist, circling it possessively as he presses me against him, and I can't help but think that I like what he's doing to me and how he makes me feel.
Because I feel wonderful. A flock of butterflies fly out in my stomach and I feel like it's my first kiss. Because it's true - it's the first kiss that really matters to me and while I really feel something.
When he breaks away from me, we are both panting, our lips red and swollen from the long and intense kissing. We're both blushing and I don't know what to say.
So Peeta starts. He was always wonderful with words.
"I did it for you," he says low. And this voice makes me weak on my knees.
God, I'm so weak because of Peeta fucking Mellark, I think. Only for him.
And then I actually realize what he just said.
"What?," I ask stupidly.
"I said I broke up with Julia for you."
"No, no, I understand but...," I say and look at him. "Why?"
I don't and can't understand how he could do it for me. I mean, brake up with Julia. He adored her so much. He had a crush on her for ever. Well, he never said that he loved her, but I guess it's hard to fall in love in a few months.
"God, Katniss, don't you see that?," he asks and stares at me waiting for me to say anything.
But I don't understand what he wants me to say. I don't understand what he's saying.
"It's you, not her, that I want," he says, caressing my cheeks with his hand, which makes me even more confused. "Okay, listen to me, Katniss. I remember driving to your house in the middle of the night when I'm sad or happy or anything. I remember you making me laugh, when I know I'm about to cry. You're the one who care about that simple things like my favorite song, my dreams," he stops for a moment and look down on his shoes, but his hand is still on my cheek, and the other is on my wrist.
When his eyes come back to mine I see more fear in them. And I'm sure about that I have to know what he was about to say, so I do the only thing I've got stuck in my mind right now.
I kiss him. I grab his face and press his lips to mine, just like he did before. His hand tightens around my waist and his other hand goes from my cheek to my hair, which I left loose for sleeping. He tangles his hand in my curls and I let out a soft sigh in response.
When we pull away, we're flusher than before, and there's a huge smile on his face. It takes me a moment to realize that I, too, am smiling so hard that my cheekbones start to hurt.
"I did it just to know what you wanted to say," I'm trying to look like I don't care, but I'm blushing with a big smile on my face, so he just laughs.
"What I was trying to say was that I think I know where I belong," he pauses and look me straight in the eyes, "I think you know it's with you, baby."
And then we spend all night long kissing and touching ourselves on my bed.
#everlark#katniss and peeta#thg series#the hunger games trilogy#katniss everdeen#peeta mellark#we love we stan peeta mellark#everlark fanfiction#taylor swift x everlark#taylor swift x thg#taylor swift#you belong with me#you belong with me (Taylor's version)#Spotify
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A story I wrote since I've been really depressed lately and haven't been okay at all for awhile so I put it into this story. It is short yes but i did put my own feelings and situation into this.
Dealing with depression, stress, self hatred. Gyutaro who had taken such a liking to you comforts you when he hears you crying in the bathroom.
COMFORT FOR THE PAIN
It had been an entire year now since you allowed Gyutaro to stay with you in your home, growing used to him dragging people in to feast on them, hearing them scream as he cut them open with his sickle, pulling out their insides, ripping off their limbs from their bodies and devouring them from inside your basement. It took a good while to get used to it despite it still making your blood run cold through your entire body, knowing that, that could be you one day if he decides to turn on you besides the fact that you two get along quite well and him offering you protection for letting him use your home to hide from the sunlight. Gyutaro is usually always gone during the night so you had some peace before he brought home another victim of his for dinner. Lately these last 6 months had been really hard on you after you had lost your job, applying everywhere that was hiring only to keep getting constantly denied, which sent you into a dark spot. Now drowning in depression and stress and having no one to help you through this time or no one to even talk to since you had no friends at all, and family can't help you either and also doesn't speak to you unless they want something from you which made it worse. You felt so damn alone and so low while struggling to do everything you can just to pay off bills, get food to eat, even going to the extent to sell yourself out to men just to get the money to survive. One night the burden was to much, the hurt really setting in as it was almost time for Gyutaro to come back from his hunt. You went into the bathroom to hide yourself so you could cry it out without him seeing. You really didn't want him seeing you in such a vulnerable, crying state at all since he is a demon and you know he is gonna say a bunch of hurtful stuff right? like how your being pathetic, weak, so on. As you enter inside the bathroom you couldn't help it, you broke down instantly after shutting the door and curling up in front of the bathtub, laying your head into your knees as your tears fell from your eyes. Unfortunately when he got back, walking past the bathroom he could hear your faint sobbing from inside and out of curiosity he opened the door, seeing you sitting in front of the tub. A faint sigh is heard from him as he walks over, sitting down beside you, putting his arm around you, pulling you into a tight embrace.
He hugs you tightly as you break down, tears running down your cheeks, whimpers leaving your lips, sniffles from your nose. He doesn't know what's going on or what it is about you but seeing you like this made him feel more protective of you, he actually wanted to care for you. The sense of absolute hurt and overbearing pain was so apparent and radiating from your body that even gyutaro could feel it. The way you cried so hard you could barely breath, choking on the air you could get into your lungs only for it to feel so difficult to exhale sometimes. Gyutaro ends up pulling you onto his lap and started to pet your head, stroking your hair so gently while looking at you. He could tell you were really hurting by the way you were crying and how heavy your breathing was. He looked at you with pure love in his eyes when he speaks up. "Aww what's wrong my little blossom?, you know whatever is bothering you, you can tell me." He says softly with his croaky, rough voice. "Everything is just so hard, I'm wearing myself out trying so hard gyutaro, I have no one in my life that can help or even wants to speak with me, i can't even get another job and I just hate myself so fucking much right now, and I just don't understand why you bother with me when I'm just nothing but pathetic, useless, and just not enough for anyone else, I also don't belong anywhere either. You should've just killed me when we met" You cried, whimpering, voice cracking as you spoke. Gyutaro couldn't believe what you just said as his facial expression is now one of complete shocked. Did you really just say he should've killed you? He thought to himself, shaking his head before holding you a little tighter now against his rough body.
"Look at me" He said sternly, putting his fingers under your chin and making you look at him, your lips in a frown as your bottom lip quivered a bit from the crying. "stop saying such pathetic things like that, I won't tolerate it understand" He spoke with a serious voice now. You felt speechless, all you could do was just look at him after hearing him say that. Gyutaro sighed and started caressing your cheek with his thumb, rubbing it in circles on your damp skin. "I'm not sure how many times i must repeat myself but i am here for you, alright?" He says as he looks at you in the eyes meaning every word he said to you but it still felt a little hard to believe him but you will trust it you suppose as you put your arms around his neck, burying your face into the side of his neck, wetting his skin with your tears as they dropped onto him like warm rain that was plastered in agony. Gyutaro could feel your tears crash against his skin wetting it as he held you close, petting your head again with his hand, putting his other arm over your waist and rubbing your back trying to ease the hurt and discomfort your feeling that is drowning you so deeply right now. After awhile your crying starts to die down, exhaustion taking hold of you as all the crying had worn you out completely and you end up falling asleep peacefully in Gyutaros arms. Gyutaro gets up still holding you in his arms as he exits the bathroom, walking to the bedroom. He enters the room and lays you down in bed, covering you with a blanket. Gyutaro watches you for a good moment when he gets an idea, a good one too that could help you out drastically. The sun starts to rise in the dark sky giving the que that Gyutaro had to leave alone in the room while you slept. He rushes out and heads down into the dark basement letting you rest and relax after what just happened. He really does love you and he will help you in anyway he can.
#demon slayer#fan fiction#fanfic#gyutaro x reader#gyutaro#gyutaro shabana#gyutaro demon slayer#anime#story#gyutaro story#gyutaro fanfict#demon slayer gyutaro#comfort
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anyway brandina time.
I've rambled before about how I love Dina Caliente and will defend her to the death etc, plus i'm a "dina was michael bachelor's young and questionable trophy wife" truther. I don't think she was ever necessarily a gold digger in a greedy manipulative sense, moreso that she valued the comfort/security found in wealth and Michael was well-off enough to provide that for her in exchange for him having a hot young wife and whatever. He came around the same time that Flamenco died, and Nighat had been dead since she was a kid, so she was entering the adult world functionally alone apart from her twin sister. I think Nina was probably jealous on some level of Dina/Michael, even if to most outsiders that relationship was questionable, because Nina just had her lameass high school boyfriend-situationship who she didn't actually want to be romantically involved with and whatever, but it still was a bit of a wedge to them for me. that's mostly irrelevant though. in turn Dina was totally jealous of Nina having Don in high school. usual sibling rivalry nonsense.
In my timeline, Michael died around the same time that Bella disappeared, so she and Mortimer ended up bonding in grief and kicked off their relationship. yknow still like, bizarre age gap but to me it's not intentionally malicious on either of their parts. BUT I do think that Mortimer as a partner did help her 'mature' in some ways, primarily because he had kids and wasn't as reckless and whatnot as Michael. She never marries Mortimer to me. She'd never be able to really replace Bella to him or his family and knows that. he has the world's angstiest verge-of-teenhood son and cassandra is literally her age. they're not about to see her as a real mom. Their relationship never really gets that deep to me, either. It gives her some time to come into her own and whatnot, be independent, etc.
Dina never went to college in my headcanon, she kinda just immediately married Michael and lived like that for a while, then lived half off his inheritance and maybe a lower-wage job of her own in the culinary industry. So sometime around her mid-to-late 20s, Mortimer also dies because he's so old. obviously that's sad for her again. With him she did have some more chances to sorta figure herself out beyond being a trophy wife, reconsider what's important to her.
MEANWHILE, Brandi was also engaged and married stupidly young. She was a teen mom to me. She and skip had a shotgun wedding, had their kids, Skip wasn't the best husband anyways before died, she went into a horrendous life-ruining grief period and alcoholism. the broke kids had it rough, the social worker breathing down her neck, etc. so she had to like, get sober eventually because Dustin had enough and had to move out and get his own life together before he lost it completely. she started doing yoga or a comparative social activity, introducing her to the Calientes, and they became friends because Brandi is so friendly and nice :) Dina's still with Mortimer, etc, but they're still getting along and Brandi's life is getting together.
Then Mortimer dies, Brandi's life is together enough and the kids are not little and in need of constant care anymore (not that she was great at that stage either but this is not a brandi broke parenting analysis post shhh). She is older than Dina to me by a bit but personal development wise they're now in the same place of "what do I do now". SO naturally they bond over that. and they start kissing about it because surprise. bisexuality.
to Brandi, Dina's nice. she can cook, she's been through grief more times than anyone can count, and is like an expert in "you need to do something fun for yourself" pep talks. to Dina, Brandi's recovery and work on herself + dedication to actually being a better parent is inspirational in a way. she doesn't really care at this point what people think of her, and Dina "professional arm candy" Caliente never really had a partner yet who had basically no expectations for how she came off to other people, giving her the most space she'd ever had to figure out her own life goals and dreams. brandi's all humble and whatever. her kids are annoying as hell but a very interesting change compared to the goth kids. dina's never a mom type to me but she does end up bonding with them all. whatever. yippee
I think after getting together, Dina would probably finally go to college or get a real career for herself otherwise. I think it can go a lot of ways. Both of them can cook. I think it'd be cute for them to open some kind of diner together :) or a similar thing. bake sale lesbians. mutual mid-life coming of age. trying to pick up the pieces of their young adulthoods not really belonging to them in a way that mattered. whatever!
#plumbog headcanon#its the sort of thing i think would work better as an actual written fic tbh#but i am sooo busy right now. and i am soooo bad at writing short succinct stories that perfectly capture my thoughts in brief.#especially since as characters they are both massively flawed and it'd be a challenge to both portray their happy future lives#without coming off like i handwave brandi being a shit parent to her kids for a chunk of their lives. idk its NUANCED#or dina with her age gaps.#i did a few dina-focused chapters in my monstrous giant fanfic that kinda suggested at her arc but from the most biased pov ever. sad!#and i SOOOO regret not putting in a later chapter of dina appearing again when i was writing it. i wanted to but couldnt work it in#but now i know what that chapter would look like and im considering just putting it as a oneshot but ahsdjflhj
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Fallen Through Time For You
Chapter Ten: Ladies and Gentleman, Steve Harrington
Masterlist:
(gif not mine)
(Sydney's POV)
A ringed, waving hand brought me back from where my mind had been slipping to all night. After we got back to the trailer, Wayne was already up and cooking something in the kitchen. True to Eddie’s word, he plopped me down on the couch and settled on the floor in front of me, him leaning back on my legs as he started his homework. I wasn’t much help with his statistics, but with every question I helped him answer he would turn his body to give me a small kiss on my jean-covered knee.
Dinner with the both of them was interesting to watch. The rapt attention Wayne had while Eddie reencountered an event that occurred at school, or how Wayne had to remind Eddie that he was so close to the finish line and regardless of what happened the next few months that he was going to graduate no matter what this year.
Eddie offered to finish the washing up as Wayne packed his meal for the night and got ready for work. I mostly stayed silent, just watching the family dynamic that they had. Eddie got too excited about Wayne’s next day off and got soapy water all over the floor? Wayne just shook his head in amusement and threw him a dish towel, warning Eddie not to flood the trailer while he was gone. Or Eddie tossing me Wayne’s keys from the kitchen table, claiming that since Wayne can’t find his truck keys, that he just had to call out of work and settle with spending the night with the two of us.
“Sweetheart?” Eddie asked as he crouched down in front of me. “Where did you go?”
Wayne had left an hour ago, tugging me into one of his rough hugs with the promise that I better be asleep by the time he gets home or Eddie would be sleeping in the van because he just knew that it would be Eddie’s fault. I laughed at him and once he walked out the door, it was like I couldn’t stop thinking about it.
Eddie moved one of his hands to land on my knee, rubbing reassuring circles into my kneecap. I cleared my throat. “You know, I have a pretty nasty scar there.”
I felt Eddie stop his rubbing for a moment before they started up again, this time more lingering. “How did you get it?”
“It was my brother’s birthday.” I started, wanting him to understand what I've been battling since I saw Wayne cooking for me in the kitchen. “I was only ten and my mother had decided that if I wanted any of his birthday cake, I had to help her clean the kitchen for dinner. I was put in charge of the dishes and I guess I wasn’t paying attention and got water all over the floor. She had asked me to grab the stack of bowls off the counter and to bring them to the table. I was rushing, wanting to get everything done in time so I could have a piece of cake. I didn’t realize the water on the floor until it was too late, and when I slipped the bowls had tumbled out of my hands and shattered all of the floor and I landed in all the glass.”
I looked up at Eddie then, meeting his beautiful dark eyes. “She had to take me to the hospital. The whole ride there was about me ‘ruining my brother's birthday’, or ‘getting blood all over the seats of her car’, and how ‘it was going to take me weeks of chores to pay her back for all the dishes I broke’.
Eddie moved his hands to grab at mine that was sitting in my lap. “That doesn’t seem very fair.”
I shook my head. “You know I wasn’t allowed to eat with “real” silverware or plates for two months? Everything was paper plates or paper towels, and that was if I was actually eating. Seeing the way that you and Wayne interact, it scares me sometimes. Not in a bad way! It’s just-kind of hard to explain?”
Eddie squeezed my hands. “I understand.”
“You do?”
“Of course,” Eddie said as he stood up and dropped my hands. For a second I thought he was going to walk away, but he just plopped down on the couch next to me, pulling at my legs to lay them over his lap. His hands went back to rubbing at my knee. “When I first got here, Wayne used to be very loud. Slamming doors, tugging open the cabinets, and stomping around the house. After watching me flinch for almost a week he sat me down and pulled the answer out of me. Have you noticed how quietly he moves around the trailer? He started making a conscious effort to make less noise so I’d stop flinching.”
One of his hands moved up to rub at his neck. “That’s another reason why I’m so loud with my movements. I didn’t want to be scared every time I heard a door slam. So when I did it, it was like taking that fear back.”
It made sense. I didn’t think there was going to be a day that I slammed doors for the hell of it, but what Eddie argued made sense. “Thank you.”
Eddie raised his eyebrows at me. “For what?”
I scooted closer to him on the couch. “For listening. For everything.”
Eddie laughed. “We haven’t even dipped below the surface, sweetheart.”
I smiled and Eddie leaned the top of his body closer to me, little distance between us. “All you gotta do is talk to me.”
Eddie leaned back and motioned for me to pull my legs back. He clapped his hands and stood up, bowing slightly and offering me a hand. “Care to retire to the bed chambers, m’lady?”
“Eddie,” I laughed and took his hand as he helped me stand up. “Are you ever going to stop talking like that?”
Eddie placed a hand to his chest, clutching at his invisible pearls. “You wound me so!”
I rolled my eyes and followed him towards his bedroom. He fell back into his bed with a huff, throwing his arm over his eyes and sagging into the blanket. I watched him in amusement, choosing to lean against the doorway. Eddie peaked at me under his arm, his other day being held out to me from the bed. “Join me?”
“As good as that sounds, I think you should let me borrow some more PJ’s or I’m going to fall asleep in my jeans.”
Eddie groaned before sitting up and forcing himself off the bed. “Good choice.”
He dug through his drawers and presented some clothes at me before tugging his shirt off. I let out a surprised noise before turning around and heading towards the bathroom. I could still hear Eddie laughing at me through the bathroom door. After I changed and made my way back to his room, he had turned all the lights off but a lamp on his desk. I could see that he changed into some flannel pants, but he chose to remain shirtless. He was leaning up against the headboard of his bed, covers tossed back for me and a large notebook in hand.
I closed the door behind me and got into bed next to him, glad that I didn’t have to argue with him about sleeping on the floor. I sat a small distance from him and when Eddie looked up, he sent me a look and used an arm to drag me closer to him. Snuggling up to his side like I did on the porch that night, I relaxed into him and felt the drop of his head against mine. “What’s with the notebook?”
“Hellfire,” Eddie said as he flipped a page. “We were supposed to have a meeting on Friday but I’m thinking about pushing it back another week.”
“Why?”
“Well,” Eddie said with an amused tone. “This weekend I was supposed to finish editing what I had written, but this really pretty girl showed up and I kind of got distracted.”
“She’s that big of a distraction?”
Eddie nodded, tongue pressed into his cheek as he tried to not smile. “The biggest. She’s so pretty that every time I look at her, I kind of forget about everything else.”
My face had to be bright red at this point, but Eddie was still looking at me with that look in his eyes. The one he had when I walked out of the bathroom in his clothes, the look when he had me pressed against his van. I felt like I was burning from the inside out.
Eddie let out a soft laugh, his smile breaking through as he shut the notebook. “The boys will be fine to wait another week.”
“What’s your campaign about anyway?”
Eddie froze from where he was trying to toss his notebook to the floor. “You want to hear about my campaign?”
“Of course,” I hooked my chin on his shoulder as I looked up at him. “Dazzle me.”
Eddie got this spark in his eyes when he was talking about D&D. His hands moved in rapid movements as he explained what had happened so far and the plans that he had for the remaining members of the party. He only stopped when I let out a yawn, giving me a sheepish smile as he shut the notebook. “You’re tired.”
I shook my head. “No! I want to hear more.”
Eddie chuckled and gently moved me back so he could stand up. “Why don’t you just sit in on the next session?”
He placed his notebook on the desk and reached over the turn off the lamp, the room being bathed in darkness. My eyes slowly adjusted as some of the street light peaked through his windows. “It won’t bother the others?”
Eddie slipped quietly in the bed, holding the covers open for me as I moved away from the headboard and laid down. Once I was settled, he let the blankets fall as he reached out to me, stroking my face as a hand moved to my waist to pull me closer to him. I went without argument, cuddling up to his bare chest and I couldn’t help but lightly trace at his scars. He trembled for a moment, and then he completely relaxed in my arms with his head leaning back against the pillow.
“Outside of the party, the only ones you haven’t met are the Corroded Coffin boys. I might have told them about you today?”
I paused my tracing, tilting my neck to meet his eyes in the dim light. “You did?”
The hand that was resting against my back traced upward, Eddie messing with one of my braids. “Does that bother you?”
“No,” I said as I started moving my hand again. “I’ve just never had someone want to talk about me like that.”
Eddie smiled and I could feel shaking with silent laughter. “I think after today they are tired of me talking about you.”
“How so?”
Eddie moved to press his forehead against mine. “They said I sounded like a ‘love-sick puppy’.”
I laughed. “You poor baby.”
Eddie let out a noise in protest. “Henderson is the only one that had my back.”
“Where did you tell them that I came from?”
Eddie’s hand continued to run up and down my back. “I told them that you were Hopper’s niece. That I went over there to pick up Dustin and the rest was history.”
“They want to meet me?”
Eddie pulled back far enough that he could make eye contact with me. “Why wouldn’t they? Of course they do! Besides Little Sinclair, I don’t think they’ve met another girl that is interested in half of the stuff we talked about. They might even try to rope you into playing.”
“That sound’s nerve-wracking.” I snorted.
Eddie pulled me back to his chest. “So if I push back the meeting, are you going to come to the next one?”
“Eddie,” I said. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed; but wherever you have been going, I’ve pretty much been following you. Obviously I would like to go. I just don’t want your friends to not like me.”
“Not gonna happen, sweetheart.” Eddie said around a yawn. “I can promise that you’ll be just fine.”
Silence settled over us. I felt Eddie’s breathing slow down and I figured he had finally fallen asleep. I moved my hand that was resting over his scars to push the hair away from his face, choosing to run my fingers through his hair.
“Sydney,” Eddie whispered to me, and I would have jumped backwards if he hadn’t lightly squeezed me in return. “Did I scare you earlier? Trying to kiss you beside the van?”
So he was trying to kiss me.
My heart clenched at the thought. I didn’t want Eddie to think I was scared of him. “No, you didn’t scare me.”
A pause. “Are you scared to kiss me?”
“Yes,” I was honest with him. Why wouldn’t I be? “No one’s ever kissed me before.”
“Well,” I felt Eddie shift and felt his lips press against my forehead. “I guess I need to make it worth your wild. Not against some old van.”
“Hey,” I warned him. “None of that. You know I don’t care. I just got nervous and a little overwhelmed today.”
I could feel his lips stretch into a lazy grin. “Too late, I’m going to rise to the challenge.”
I huffed at him and just closed my eyes. “Are you going to do this with everything?”
“Just the important things,” Eddie teased back as he relaxed back into me.
I don’t really know when I fell asleep, I just know that I felt Eddie tighten his grip on me before I completely dropped off. Like it would allow me to follow him into any of his dreams.
I wasn’t alone when I woke up this morning. I could feel Eddie running his fingers up my back, one hand tracing shapes into my waist. It was still dark outside, the trailer park completely quiet with no signs of life. I let out a groan and tried to shuffle closer to the warmth that Eddie gave off in the cold morning air.
“Sleep well?” I could hear the teasing in Eddie’s voice.
“Five more minutes,” I muttered into his chest.
“Ah, ah, ah,” Eddie says and I feel him try to push me off his chest. “If you ask me that again, I must just give in and then we’d be late.”
“It’s overrated anyway,” I said as I pulled up to look at his sleepy expression. “Good morning.”
“It’s good now,” Eddie said cheekily as he leaned down to kiss my forehead.
I lazily swatted at him and rolled away so I was laying on my back. “What time is it?”
“Wayne’s not home yet,” Eddie answered instead as he sat up, looking down at me.
“And you woke me up?” I whined as I rubbed my eyes.
“Oh baby,” Eddie said with a sleepy laugh. “I just wanted to spend some time with you before we have to separate.”
I lowered my hands and frowned. “I can’t be annoyed with you when you’re being sweet.”
“I’m always sweet.” Eddie said as he shifted to slightly lean over me. One hand came to cup my cheek. “I taste sweet too.”
“Eddie!” I let out a surprised laugh and tried to bring my hands up to cover my blushing face.
Eddie let out a deeper laugh and moved to get off the bed, letting me try to get over his boldness. After I felt calmed, I sat up and watched Eddie flitter around the room. He pulled a gray shirt from his drawers and tugged it on before moving on to his closet. “Do you want to borrow another shirt today?”
“How about another flannel?” I asked as I stretched when I stood up.
Eddie tossed a black and white one in my direction before going back to dig in his closet. “Do you wanna call Steve?”
“Why do I need to call Steve?”
Finding what he was looking for, Eddie turned back to me. “To tell him about spending the day with him?”
I stared at Eddie for a moment, my mind trying to play catch up. “I thought you told him yesterday?”
“Well,” Eddie fidgeted with a pants hanger. “I was supposed to call him last night but forgot?”
“Eddie Munson,” I sighed and shook my head. “Do you think he’s going to be up this early?”
“He takes Robin to school, Dustin too.” Eddie supplied. “Numbers on a pad by the phone.”
I rolled my eyes with a smile and started out of the room. I found the number pretty easily, and it only took two rings before the phone rang. “Harrington residence?”
“Hey, Steve.”
“Sydney?” I heard Steve question around a yawn. “Is everything okay?”
“Yes!” I rushed to reassure him, now realizing how the phone call might sound at whatever the time was. “Eddie mentioned to me yesterday that you have the day off and wanted to spend it with me?”
Steve chuckled. “I thought you might want to spend the day with someone. Eddie was supposed to call me back last night with the answer but I can see that he got distracted.”
“This happen a lot?”
“Define a lot?”
I laughed. “But yeah, I’d like to spend the day with you if that’s okay. I don’t think I’m comfortable enough to stay by myself all day.”
“No worries, I’m the one that brought it up. I have to drop Robin off at school, want to catch me there?”
“Sure,” I shrugged my shoulders and realized that he couldn’t see me.
“Max mentioned that you met Murray yesterday?”
“That’s a long story,” I said and I heard a truck pull up in front of the trailer, their lights flashing through the windows. “Tell you later?”
“Of course,” Steve said as I heard a car door slam and the sound of someone coming up the steps and then the door rattled. The door opened quietly as Wayne tried to sneak in before he noticed me on the phone.
“See you soon, Steve.”
Steve muttered a goodbye before I hung the phone back up. Wayne sent me a tired smile and shut the door. “I thought I told you to be asleep by the time I got home?”
Before I could reply, Eddie came bounding down the hallway with energy that I couldn’t fathom having this early. “Wayne!”
Wayne raised his eyebrows at me before putting the pieces together. “You’re up early.”
Eddie shrugged his shoulders before moving around me in the kitchen, dragging a metal lunchbox to the island and popping open the top. “Just couldn’t bear being away from your pretty face.”
Wayne snorted and swatted at Eddie as he made his way into the kitchen. I left them be as I went to grab my clothes and get ready for the day. By the time I came back, there was another piece of toast waiting for me on the table and Eddie was still messing around in that lunchbox of his. Wayne was sitting in his recliner, mug in hand as the news droned on about the weather.
“What did Steve say?” Eddie asked as he slid into the seat across from me, sliding me a mug of coffee.
“That you were supposed to call him last night,” I said. “He said you have a habit of being distracted.”
Eddie rolled his eyes but made no move to argue with me as he just stuffed a handful of cereal in his mouth. I left him at the table as I finished up and Eddie found me as I was taking my braids out, my hair falling in waves down my back. He whistled at me from the bedroom door, leaning against it with his arms crossed.
“I might have to let you braid mine,” Eddie said as he pushed off the door and crowded into my space. He touched a loose strand before tucking it behind my ear.
“You’d let me braid your hair?” I asked him, surprised.
“Only if you’d put one of those metal viking braids in my hair! Could you imagine how I’d look onstage?”
“Onstage?
“Yeah? The boys and I performed at the Hideout?” At the look of confusion on my face, Eddie took a step back. “I swear I said something about it.”
I took a step forward to be back in his space. “I think I’d remember you mentioning about one of your performances. You mentioned the band, I just connected some dots.”
Eddie pulled some of his hair in front of his face, his expression turning bashful. “After everything, you know the manhunt and the recovery; it was a bit difficult to get back into it. I think I’ve almost fully convinced the owner that I’m not some spawn of Satan and we might be able to perform again.”
“Do people still really think that?”
Eddie didn’t answer me as he suddenly turned and grabbed his bag on the desk. He held a hand out to me, letting out a deep breath when I intertwined our hands and let him guide me out of the room. Wayne was by the door when we tried to leave this time, Max waving her arms on the other side of the door. Eddie didn’t speak again until we were in the van, Max’s headphones over her ears.
“You saw Carver,” Eddie started. “Even with the cover story that was fed to the town, my reputation didn’t exactly help clear up those rumors.”
Eddie’s attention was on the road, one hand on the wheel while the other rested between my hands. I was fiddling with the rings on his hand and every so often he would turn his hand over to give mine a gentle squeeze before opening his hand back up for me.
“Carver is an asshole,” I argued back, “Shouldn’t some of the adults in this town have common sense?”
“Welcome to Hawkins, hell on earth.” Eddie quoted to me, mirroring what was one of the first things he said to me.
Not knowing what to say, I just squeezed his hand and looked out the window. The highschool was not what I was expecting, smaller than what I thought it would be with people all over the parking lot. Eddie parked towards the back of the lot, shutting the van off and watching the other students filter around the grounds. I turned to look back at Max when I noticed that she had moved forward, pressing against the back of my seat.
“It’s strange that they all just accepted the story from Owens and went back to their normal lives,” Max said as she stared at the windshield. “What are they going to do when Vecna comes back?”
“If he comes back,” Eddie shot back in a tone that said they’ve had this conversation before.
Max snorted, not amused. “You really think he’s going to give up? We know better than anyone.”
“Exactly,” Eddie pointed out as he caught sight of something and threw his seatbelt off. “We know better than to hope that he won’t come back. We just have to be ready for when he does.”
Max didn’t say anything else as she opened the door behind me and jumped out. I turned to watch her walk over to Lucas, who seemed to just arrive at the school. I heard Eddie’s door shut before he was opening mine, helping me out the van. Something nagged at me as Eddie shut the door behind me, leaning up against the door.
“Would you rather not know what you know now?” I asked him as I waved an arm out to the sea of people around us. “Be oblivious to what happened?”
Eddie shook his head as he pulled out a pack of cigarettes and went to light one. He took his time answering, taking a big puff before tilting his head back to releasing the smoke slowly. “The scars are painful and the nightmares are horrifying but,” Eddie stopped as he looked back to his right to see more of the party had joined Lucas and Max. Steve’s car was parked next to the group, Dustin excitedly getting out of the backseat to say something to Max. “What they went through? What I went through? If I wouldn’t have gone through it, I wouldn’t have found them. Hell, maybe I wouldn’t have found you. I’m going to be bonded to those little shits for the rest of my life, and most days it makes everything okay.”
“Nightmares?” I asked, seeming to grasp onto that out of his whole speech. “You’ve been having nightmares?”
Eddie chuckled and dropped his cigarette to the ground, stepping on it before wrapping an arm around my shoulders and started leading me towards the group. I could see that Robin had dragged Steve out of the car, him lugging an instrument out of the trunk. “I haven’t had one since you showed up.”
“Is that a good thing?”
“The best,” Eddie said with a smile. “I haven’t had a decent night's sleep in a long time.”
He didn’t say anything else as we joined the group. Dustin was quick to pull me into a hug, claiming that I couldn’t go without seeing him for that long again. Robin rolled her eyes with a laugh and said something to Eddie as Steve settled beside me. He was dressed casually, but for the first time I noticed the glasses on his face.
“Glasses and gray hair?” I teased him. “Maybe you are turning into an old man.”
Steve sent me a bitchy look before shaking his head. “Is this what I’m going to have to put up with all day?”
“Oh Steve,” Eddie sang as he pressed himself up against my back, his head resting on my shoulder with his hair tickling my cheek. “I promise that I’m worse.”
“Oh I know you are,” Steve sighed. “But she’s your soulmate. I’m going to have my hands full with the two of you.”
Before I could argue, the sound of a bell resonated throughout the air. Dustin let out a groan and tugged at Lucas. They waved goodbye as they started towards the school, leaving the four of us alone. Eddie unwrapped himself from me, moving the stand in front of me. “Can I call you again at lunch?”
I smiled. “I think you might have separation anxiety, baby,”
Eddie flushed and did the thing where he pulled his hair in his face, like he was trying to hide his smile. I’ve noticed him doing it the past few days, and it made my heart flutter as I reached up to tuck in back behind his ear.
Robin fake gagged beside us and shoved her instrument at Eddie to carry. “C’mon, I don’t want to be late!”
Eddie rolled his eyes and took a step back from me. “You know, if you actually carried your own instrument to class you wouldn’t have to worry about being late.”
Robin just sniggered and with a wave at Steve and I, she started towards the school. Eddie let out an amused sigh and sent me a wink as he started after her. “Till we meet again, sweetheart!”
Steve watched with me as the two of them got through the doors, leaving us in an almost quiet parking lot. We stood there for an awkward moment, really not knowing what to say.
Finally Steve broke the silence. He let out a frustrated sigh and rubbed a hand down his face. “I’m so used to Robin filling up the silence that I forget I have to speak sometimes.”
I chuckled. “I can be comfortable with the silence. I’m used to not really talking at all.”
“Seems like shitty parents might be a theme around here,” Steve said as he motioned a hand out to the car. “You ready to head out?”
I nodded and took Robin’s seat as Steve started the car. He didn’t say anything else as he drove out of school bounds and in a different direction than Eddie had driven from. It was another few moments of quiet before Steve couldn’t take it anymore.
“I have some errands I need to run today. Would you rather do that or we go back to my house and not know what to say to each other?”
“I’m down for anything,” I said. I was happy to follow Steve anywhere in Hawkins today, I had no problems with being taken along for the ride.
That’s how we ended up in a small grocery store, Steve pushing me a cart when we entered the store while he read off from a list that seemed to have five different hand writing’s on it. I tried to help him make out what seemed to be Dustin’s writing, but mainly just stuck with pushing the cart and taking it all in.
“You know if you want anything, just put it in the cart.” Steve said as he put a box of cereal in the cart that looked exactly like what Eddie was eating out of this morning. “We spend a lot of time at my house, I’d hate to not have anything for you to enjoy.”
I couldn’t even open my mouth to argue before Steve was holding his hand up. “For peace of mind, please grab something? Eddie would kill me if I let you starve, and I promise this guilt that you might feel is not needed. I want to buy you something to eat, so amuse me?”
“What is it with everyone making sure I have something to eat?” I said as I shook my head.
“I take it Wayne said something to you?” Steve asked with a grin as he put a box of poptarts in the cart.
“More like who hasn’t,” I complained as I looked over some of the cereal brands. “It feels like they are trying to smother me.”
I felt my face get red as I turned to face Steve and correct my mistake. “That sounded harsher than I meant it to be! I just me-”
Steve held up a hand. “I know what you mean. It’s hard to accept stuff from someone because you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop.”
I started at Steve for a moment, the comment that Robin made at the Byers house circling my thoughts. “I know that no one here is expecting anything from me, but it’s just…”
“Hard,” Steve finished for me as he moved to stand in front of me. “Before Mrs. Henderson, it was really hard for me to accept things from an adult. But now? She won’t let me leave the family dinner’s without two days of leftovers. For a while I was waiting for the other shoe to drop, for her to come out and ask me for something big. But she didn’t, she never has. She just wanted to make sure I was eating with my parents being gone.”
Steve let out a deep breath and ran a hand through his hair. He looked around the empty isles of the grocery store before leaning closer to me. “Look, if anyone in the group is going to get it, it’s going to be me. I know it’s going to take a while to get used to, but I like taking care of everyone. So why don’t we just start small? Pick out three things to put in the cart and we can go from there.”
“I can do that,” I said. “It really gets easier?”
Steve laughed as he moved to push the cart, me falling into step beside him. “The only one that I still argue with is Wayne. The man took one look at me when I was helping Eddie and deemed me a part of his family. I know that he knows that when I go over there to see Eddie, that I’m not expecting anything. But I’m not used to adults giving so freely without there being a catch.”
Steve left me to think about that as he tried to find the chips that Max would eat. I just stared at the shelves in front of me, trying to decide what I could eat this week when someone grabbed my arm. I flinched and immediately tried to pull my arm away, but when I looked up there was an older woman standing there, no older than Joyce. She refused to let go of my arm, her hand wrinkling Eddie’s flannel as she studied me.
“You’re Hopper’s niece?” She finally questioned as she stared me down. “The one that came down from the city?”
My mouth opened, but no words came out. What the hell was this lady’s problem?
“I-uh,” tried to say as I tried freeing my arm from her grasp again.
A hand landed on my shoulder and before I could flinch from that one, Steve made a point to stand in front of me, causing the woman to drop her hold on me. I clutched my arm to my chest, letting Steve block me from view.
“Mrs. Perkins,” I could hear the fakeness in his tone. “How are you doing?”
“Steven,” The lady-Mrs. Perkins grumbled as she tried to see around him. “Why don’t you introduce me to your friend?”
“Who? Sydney?” Steve asked as he looked back at me, and with a nod from me he moved to stand at my side, his arm going across my shoulders in a protective measure.
“Anne Carver mentioned that Jason and you got introduced over the weekend.” She said, obviously fishing for information. “I didn’t know Hopper had any other relatives.”
“Uncle Hop’s private about his family,” I said with a fake smile, taking comfort in knowing that Steve had my back here. “You know how small towns are.”
“Oh, yes.” She said with a fake grin. “How do you know Steven?”
Her eyes cut to the arm that Steve had loosely hanging by his side and to mine from where I was still clutching an arm to my chest.
“Hopper wanted me to show her around town,” Steve said sweetly, but I could tell he was getting annoyed. “Just stopped in to get some groceries before heading back out.”
“No one has caught the reason that you moved down here.” Mrs.Perkins dug her heels further in. “No one just moves to Hawkins.”
“Didn’t you?” I asked as I looked up at Steve and he shrugged his shoulders for show. “Or have you lived here your whole life?”
She let out a noise of protest and I felt Steve trying to not laugh beside me. She waved a hand in the air. “I just thought I’d do my civic duty and introduce myself to our newest resident. There are a few people that you might want to stay away from, dear. This town hasn’t been the nicest in the last few years.”
I tilted my head. “Uncle Hop made sure to tell me all about what’s been going on the last few years. I think I’m just fine where I’m at.”
She let out a humph and took a step back from us. “Well just be careful. Anne Carver heard that you were hanging around a particular boy at the arcade and I just wanted to warn you that he was trouble.”
“Eddie Munson?” Steve questioned as his arm moved from my shoulder to cross across his chest. “You mean the Eddie Munson that I had to pull out of the rubble of the earthquake because he was locked in the Creel House?”
Mrs. Perkins tsked and raised her purse further up her arm. “If that’s what you claim happened. We all know the truth.”
“Oh, you do?” I questioned, angry now. I gestured at her, raged that she could just talk about Eddie like that in public. “You don’t know fu-”
She reached out again and grasped my left arm, pushing up my flannel sleeve to my elbow. I tried to pull my arm out of her grip again, but she held on tight with her fingernails digging into my arm.
“Ah!” She said as she found what she was looking for, looking down at my soulmark. “So what Jason said was true.”
I was furious and felt humiliated. This bitch really riled me up to prove what Jason was trying to spread around this time. She wanted to see Eddie’s name on my wrist, she wanted to have something to spread around town.
“That’s enough!” Steve said as he pushed her back, her dropping my arm in shock as Steve moved to completely stand between us. “If you don’t leave now, I’m going to call Hopper. I can promise you, he is not going to be happy when I tell him that you were harassing and assaulting his niece.”
“Assault?” Mrs.Perkins said as she clutched at her chest. “I did no such thing!”
“The red marks on her arm say otherwise,” Steve spat out. “Now leave or I’ll drag your ass to the front of the store and make sure that you can’t leave before Hopper gets here.”
“Oh, Steven.” Mrs.Perkins said as she sighed and started walking in the opposite direction. “What would your mother think?”
Steve tensed up in front of me and before he could retaliate, she turned the corner and left line of sight. He didn’t move from in front of me, his stance still rigid as he was breathing deeply.
“Steve?” I questioned softly as I put a hand on his arm and moved to stand in front of him. “Hey, Steve?”
It took Steve a second to tear his eyes away from the corner and down at me. His eyes searched my face before he let out a deep breath and relaxed his stance. “We need to call Hopper.”
“Steve-” I started as he reached for me. I didn’t flinch this time, let him pull my arm to him so he could see the red marks that she left behind.
“Fuck!” Steve exclaimed. “Sydney, I’m so sorry. I had no idea that she was going to do that.”
“Hey, hey.” I said to him, “It’s okay, Steve. I’m not mad at you.”
Steve shook his head and dropped my arm. “Gossiping bitch. I shouldn’t have let her say anything to you, I should have made us walk away. Now she’s gonna run her damn mouth about you and Eddie.”
“Steve, should I be ashamed of Eddie?” I asked.
“What?” Steve asked, appalled. “Of course not!”
“Then don’t worry about it.” I said as I pushed my sleeve back down. “Let her fucking talk. We knew people were going to say something about me showing up; and with how touchy Eddie is, do you really think people weren’t going to notice?”
“Still!” Steve exclaimed. “She didn’t have any right to touch you! I should go after her a-”
“Steve!” I grabbed his arm. “Let’s just finish shopping and get back to your house to call Hopper. That’s what we can do right now, I really don’t want to be in public anymore.”
“Yeah, of course.” Steve nodded as he grabbed the cart. “You promise that you're okay?”
“I’m not,” I admitted. “But I will be, I just hate that I’m going to tell Eddie this. He’s going to be so pissed.”
We called Hopper first when we got to Steve’s house. He dialed the number to the station for me before he went to bring the rest of the groceries in. Hopper was furious, wanting to know what happened from my perspective, and then Steve’s.
“You should have called me at the store!” Hopper said loudly. “I could have nipped this shit in the bud before it got spread around town!”
“You coming would have caused a bigger scene!” I said as Steve crowded me to hear the other side of the conversation. “Steve had it covered, Hopper. How long do you really think you could keep me off the radar before people started talking?”
“Look,” Hopper started. “Munson’s a good kid, I like him a lot now that I’ve got to know him. I trust him, but the people around here have mixed opinions because of what happened back in March. You know some of what they say about Eddie. Are you ready for that to be said about you?”
“Hopper, people were going to find out eventually.” I sighed. “Eddie’s worth whatever they want to say to me.”
I passed the phone back to Steve and let him take care of the rest. My arm was sore and I knew that the conversation with Eddie wasn’t going to be nice. The conversation from that first night on the porch kept coming to mind. How I was choosing to stay with him. Would he feel like it’s worth it?
Steve found me a little later, sitting on the steps of the staircase as I traced at my soulmark. He had his keys in hand and was shrugging on a jacket.
“I need to mail a few bills and I’ll grab something for lunch while I’m out. You okay to wait here?” Steve checked at his watch. “They should be going to lunch soon, it will give you a chance to talk to Eddie without any prying ears.”
I shrugged my shoulders.
“Hey,” Steve said as he sat down beside me on the stairs. “You know that none of this is your fault, right?”
“I let her rile me up,” I said. “She got exactly what she wanted. If I would just kept qu-”
“No,” Steve interrupted me. “If it’s anyone’s fault, it’s mine. I should have walked the both of us away.”
Steve moved a hand to push my sleeve up further up my arm, taking in the purpling marks on my arm. “She got you pretty good.”
I huffed and pushed my sleeve back down. “I’m just worried about Eddie.”
“Worried how?” Steve asked. “He’s not going to be upset with you.”
“I know that,” I said and I meant it. I knew without a doubt that Eddie would never get upset with me about this. “He’s going to be upset that he wasn’t there or that this is something that I’m going to have to ‘put up with’ being with him. He’s been spending so much time making sure I’m comfortable here that I don’t want anything to push him over the edge.”
“It’s going to be okay,” Steve said as he rubbed a hand down my back. “I’ll make sure of it.”
I nodded and didn’t say anything else.
“Any requests for lunch?” Steve asked me as he stood back up. “Pickles, right?”
“Oh fuck off,” I let out a suprised laugh. “If you come back with pickles, I’ll let Robin put hair dye in your conditioner.”
Steve gasped and let it fall into a smile. “I told you I was going to have my hands full with you guys.”
I rolled my eyes as he left the house. It felt weird exploring someone else’s house, so I just made my way to stand back at the phone in the kitchen and wait for Eddie’s phone call. I knew why Steve wanted me to talk to Eddie about this alone, but it would be easier if I had someone here with me.
“Sweetheart,” was the first thing that Eddie said when I picked up the phone-greeting be damned and not letting me speak. When I didn’t say anything, Eddie let out a groan and it sounded like he smacked the phone against something. “Harrington, I promise I’m not trying to seduce you.”
I laughed. “Why would Steve think that?”
“Sydney!” Eddie exclaimed with a laugh. “You little shit, had me thinking I was professing my love to the wrong person.”
“Was that your intention with this phone call?” I asked as I twirled the cord around my fingers. “Professing your undying love for me?”
“Alas, I love another.” Eddie said dramatically. “I’m sorry-but Stevie’s the one for me. It’s the polo’s, they just draw me in!”
“Eddie!” I laughed. “You’re lucky that Steve isn’t here to witness this.”
“Steve isn’t there?” Eddie stopped laughing, his voice taking on a more serious tone. “Steve left you alone in his house?”
“He left to grab lunch,” I offered up and was beating around the bush. “I didn’t want to be out in public anymore.”
“Sydney,” Eddie warned. “If something happened this morning, you need to tell me.”
“You have to promise me you won’t leave school.” I said. “Whatever that happened is over with and I have Steve here with me and we’ve already called Hopper. It’s going to be okay.”
“If you don’t tell me what happened, I will leave this school.” Eddie threatened. “I’m not kidding, sweetheart. Spill.”
I let out a troubled sigh. “You won’t get mad at me?”
“Of course not,” Eddie said softly. “I promise I’m never going to raise my voice at you.”
I bit my lip. “So I might have gotten harassed at the grocery store this morning with Steve?”
Eddie’s voice went up a few octaves, but the volume of his voice didn’t increase. “I’m sorry, what? You might have gotten harassed?”
“Eddie…”
I heard him let out a deep sigh, his voice now back to normal. “Baby, I’m sorry. You were saying?”
I looked down at my wrist, Eddie’s name in silver ink gleaming against my skin. I couldn’t lie to him. “So I guess word got out about my little confrontation with Jason at the arcade. One of Hawkins' most respected women took it upon herself to see if it was true.”
“Which is?”
“That I’m Hopper’s niece.”
“Sydney,” Eddie warned. “You do not want me coming to find you.”
“That we’re soulmates.” I rushed out. “I guess that Jason went around telling everyone that you found your soulmate and they wanted to see if it was true. And-she-tried-to-warn-me-to-stay-away-from-you-and-she-grabbed-me-really-hard–”
“She touched you?” Eddie said angrily, his voice the deepest I’ve heard. “She left marks? Where the hell was Steve?”
I looked down at my arm, there was no downplaying it, Eddie would see the dark marks when he picked me up. “Steve separated us. He tried to defend you, but I think she just wanted to rile the both of us. The moment I lifted a hand at her she grabbed me.”
Eddie was silent on the other side of the line. I waited for him to speak, to make a noise, to do anything.
“Baby?”
“So all this happened and you don’t want me to be there with you” Eddie said angrily. “You worried she’s right?”
I let out an angry noise. “Edward Munson, don’t turn this into something it’s not.”
Eddie let out an angry laugh. “And what would that be? My soulmate was harassed in public without me and she doesn’t want me to comfort her?”
“Don’t,” I said. “Eddie, you know that’s not what this is.”
“You really think I should prioritize school over you? I should just leave you with Steve?”
“Yes,” I snapped back. “Eddie, I know that finishing school is important to you and I’m not going to let you give them another reason for you to not graduate this year. I haven’t even been here a whole week, you can’t uproot everything for me.”
The line was silent. Eddie cleared his throat.
“Did it leave a bruise? And it’s the arm with the mark?”
“Maybe…?”
“So this is what we are going to do,” Eddie said. “I’m going to finish the day out because whether I like it or not, you are right. Not about school being more important because I would never walk back into Hawkins High again if it meant keeping you away from all this; but because one wrong move and I know that I’m done. When school lets out, I’m coming to pick you up and we are having a long discussion on the place you have in my life. You seem to think that you just blend into the background sweetheart, and I can promise you that even in a pitch black room I’d be able to pick you out. You are going to tell what happened word for word, and then I’m going to call Hopper.”
“Eddie-”
“This isn’t a suggestion, sweetheart.” Eddie chuckled. “I think I’ve gone about this all wrong and I plan on fixing that today.”
I didn’t say anything. Eddie didn’t seem mad at me, but it was still my fault wasn’t it? No matter how hard I’ve tried not to, I’ve been making waves since I got here. Maybe I shouldn’t have intervened at the arcade, but how could I not?
“I just have one question for you and then I’ve got to head to class,” Eddie broke me out of my thoughts.
I nodded even though he couldn’t see me.
“You told me on that porch you wanted to stay. Do you regret it?”
My eyebrows furrowed, even though I knew at some point this question would come back up. “Of course not. I don’t think I could live without you now, Eddie.”
Eddie sighed and there were muffled voices coming from the line, like someone was trying to get his attention.
“I’ve gotta go baby. I’ll see you in a few hours?”
“I’ll be here,” I said. “Eddie, I-”
“I know, sweetheart,” Eddie interrupted. “See you soon.”
The rest of the afternoon passed too quickly and not quick at all. Steve returned with lunch and we spent the rest of the afternoon realizing we were much similar than we thought we’d be. It ended up with us in the backyard, lounging on some pool chairs as the breeze swayed the trees. Steve was reading from some magazine that Robin had left over, mocking the dating advice and hair tips before he got quiet.
“Steve?” I asked him. “Did your bitchiness run out?”
“Har har,” He said as he sat up in my direction. The expression on his face screamed curiosity.
I sat up as well, tucking my feet underneath me to face him. “You want to ask me something.”
He nodded. “If it makes you uncomfortable, you don’t have to answer it.”
I rolled my eyes. “I think we are past that point now.”
Steve hesitated. “The mark. I know that you said you didn’t have them where you came from, but I just wanted to know if you noticed anything about the mark since it’s shown up.”
I frowned. “What do you mean by notice?”
Steve’s face turned a bit red. “I don’t want to sound stupid.”
“Steve,” I said as I moved on the chair to be closer to him, grabbing his hand. “I’m not going to think it’s stupid.”
Steve wouldn’t look at me. “Eddie is the only one in the group that has their soulmark. I know that they can show up anytime after you turn twenty, but Eddie has always had his since I’ve known him. Hell, you don’t know how many times Dustin used to make me look up your name at Family Video to see if your name was in our system.”
My chest felt a little heavy with an emotion I couldn’t place. “I didn’t know that.”
Steve nodded and tapped on the back of my hand. “Dude’s obsessed with you. He used to talk about how some days, it was like your emotions were so strong he could feel you. Like you were next to him.”
“That can happen?”
Steve laughed and looked up at me. “That answers one of my questions. You haven’t been able to feel him?”
“I-I don’t know,” I said, curious. Have I been? The times speaking to Eddie that the emotions seem to burst in my chest? Has that been him in the background this whole time?
“Eddie’s been twenty for a few months, about to turn twenty-one.” Steve mentioned. “How long have you been twenty for?”
“Since March,” I said. Hell, I didn’t even know his birthday. Did I ever tell him mine? “Everything is a little fuzzy, I’m still not sure the exact date it was when I left.”
“So you didn’t just turn twenty?” Steve asked. “So that means you didn’t get your mark on your birthday.”
“Steve?” I asked. “What’s this about?”
Steve groaned and fell backwards in his chair. “Can you keep a secret?”
“You’re keeping secrets from Robin?” I gasped in an attempt to make him laugh.
Steve didn’t reply, just laid there with his hands over his eyes. “When I finally got my shit together and turned into a decent human being, I was so grateful for finding Robin and having a relationship with the kids. Sure Nancy, Jonathan, and I are still trying to find our footing; but I don’t know where I would be without the kids. And then I really got to know Eddie during spring break and it was like I had added another person to this mix-match family.”
Steve sighed and sat back up. “And then you came along and it was like I had this feeling that you had to be a part of it too? One look at you on that couch just made me feel so protective, like I had another person to protect but it was a different bond than what I had with Robin and the kids. Like we had grown up together but with a wall between us, siblings that only saw of each other through cracks in the foundation. And I just want to know when it’s my turn. When it’s my turn to find the person I’m supposed to love with no bounds, the one that’s going to come into my life and make everything easier.”
“Steve,” I sighed sadly and moved to sit beside him on the chair. “Is it too much for me to be here?”
“No!” Steve rushed out and grabbed at me. “Just coming down the aisle this morning and seeing Mrs.Perkins all over you, I just felt this instinct that I had to protect you. Like when you stepped in front of El. And it just had me thinking, would this be my life? Shouldn’t I feel grateful for all the love that the party gives me? But no, I’m being selfish in wanting more and wanting it now.”
I debated for a second before wrapping my arms around him and hugging myself to his side. “Steve, it’s not selfish for you to want this. Sure, I didn’t know of Eddie or know that I had the possibility of meeting him. But I did have a feeling that he was out there. That if I could get through the hardest part of my old life, that one day I would meet him and it would be worth it.”
“But haven’t I paid my dues?” Steve’s broken voice asked. “I’ve been beaten, drugged, tortured, bitten into, and dragged through the Upside Down. I’ve had so many concussions that I now have to wear glasses and my right ear rings loudly when it gets too loud. Haven’t I paid enough?”
“Oh, Steve” I sighed as I moved out of his space to look at him. His eyes were red and watery, like he was about to cry. “There is someone out there for you, and I promise when you get your mark I’ll help you search everywhere for them. Think about it, would you really want to bring someone into all of this now? You said it, Vecna’s not dead. Would you really want this person to come in now? Or after you’ve had the chance to heal?”
“It’s just not fair,” Steve said as he moved to rest his head on my shoulder. “I know that I have you all to comfort me, but it’s just not the same. Just watching you and Eddie, the way that you two seem to just gravitate towards each other. It’s so easy.”
I snorted and tried to fix the damage I might have inflicted when Steve raised his head to look me. “I’m sorry, it’s not funny at all. You really think that it’s so easy?”
“Why wouldn’t it be?”
“Steve.” I said, deadpanned. “Take a second to really think about this. I had a shitty home life, did you not see how uncomfortable I was spending Eddie’s money to get clothes? Or how he has to order for me or we have to share a plate because I can’t help but feel that I’m taking up too much space? Since I’ve got here, Eddie has been bending over backwards to make sure that I am comfortable and I can’t give him anything in return! I can’t even k-”
I slammed my mouth shut, not wanting to mention what occurred yesterday until I had figured it out for myself. Steve regarded me curiously, wiping at his eyes before leaning back. “You can't do what?”
I crossed my arms. “I don’t want to talk about it, we were talking about you.”
“You’re not getting out of this one,” Steve said with a laugh. “What is Eddie wanting you to do that you can’t?”
“He’s not making me do anything,” I groaned and rubbed my eyes. “Can you just drop it?”
“No.” The little shit smiled at me. “His hands are already all over you, what more does he want?”
Steve stared at me for a moment before his eyes got wide. “Oh shit.”
I felt my face go red. “Whatever you are thinking, don’t.”
“Really? Because I’m over here thinking that you haven’t kissed Eddie. That man is all over you, all the time. I’d think if you were kissing at this point, he’d have no shame in doing it in front of us.”
I groaned. “Can’t we go back to you being sad?”
Steve laughed and moved into my space to knock my shoulder. “C’mon. You were doing such a good job cheering me up.”
I looked up at him. “Are you cheered up?”
Steve shrugged. “The longing is still there. I know they're out there, but maybe you are right. Maybe if I’m patient and all this Vecna stuff is over with, I’ll be able to be happy without looking over my shoulder all the goddamn time.”
“Do you feel them?”
A few emotions passed through Steve’s expression. “I don’t know. Sometimes I feel like there is something there, like a faint buzzing in the background? But then I come back into focus and it’s gone.”
I shrugged. “I think you need to be talking to Eddie about all this.”
“You do, huh?” Steve teased. “Maybe I’ll teach him my way so he can properly romance you.”
“Fuck off,” I laughed and knocked my shoulder against his. “I swear to God, Harrington. If try to give Eddie advice on how to kiss me, I’m going to fucking murder you. He’s doing just fine on his own.”
Steve raised an eyebrow. “He is?”
I let out another laugh and pushed him further into the chair. “Shut up!”
“Hey, hey,” Eddie’s voice came from the backdoor. He was leaning against the glass, a small smile on his face. “Cat fight going on out here?”
Steve groaned. “Fuck off, Munson.”
“Sorry, I’m taken.” Eddie bit back as he pushed off the glass and made his way to the chair that I was occupying. “What are you two even fighting about?”
“Nothing!” My voice was higher than normal, face flushing again. “Steve here was just being a little shit.”
Steve’s mouth dropped open. “You started it!”
Before I could get back at him, Eddie had grabbed my hands and pulled up off the chair to be pressed against him. No space between us as his hands slid from mine to wrap around my waist. He leaned down to nuzzle into my hair, a deep sigh releasing from his chest. I closed my eyes in content, a warm feeling passing over me and washing away all the anxiety from this morning.
“Get a room.” Steve complained from the chair.
Eddie chuckled and leaned back but not breaking from his hold around me. “You ready to go home, sweetheart?”
“Eddie, man-” Steve started as he stood up from the lounge chair.
Eddie held out his hand. “Sydney, why don’t you grab your shoes and I’ll meet you at the van. I gotta talk to Stevie for a moment.”
I didn’t bother to argue, giving Steve a light hug before making my back into the house. Eddie only took a few minutes before he found me at the van, helping me into the passenger side with little to say. I watched as Steve waved at us from the door, Eddie pulling out in true fashion and starting to head in the opposite direction.
“Where are we going?” I asked him as he drove down some unfamiliar roads.
“We are going somewhere alone to talk,” Eddie said as he took a sharp turn. He made eye contact with me, a small smile pulling at his lips. “Somewhere with no interruptions or where you might feel overwhelmed. Quiet.”
Eddie didn’t speak again until we reached our destination. He pulled into a deserted parking lot, forestation starting to take it back over. He shut the van off after a moment, jerking his head towards the back of the van before getting out. I watched him, confused as he disappeared from sight, but jumping when the back doors of the van opened.
“You going to join me back here?”
I took a deep breath and got out of the van to follow him around the back. Both doors were open, Eddie smoothing down a thick blanket on the floor of the van. There were a few pillows thrown into the back, another blanket folded in the corner.
Eddie patted the spot next to him, so I kicked off my shoes and made myself comfortable and pulled the extra blanket across my lap. He followed my lead and finished kicking off his shoes, an arm wrapping itself around my shoulders and pulling me to lean against him.
“Start from the beginning,” Eddie said softly. “I promise I’m not going to raise my voice.”
I took a deep breath and told him what happened this morning. The lady riling us up, Steve sticking up for Eddie, sticking up for me. Calling Hopper and arguing about not arresting the lady. I repeated the sentiment that I told Hopper; that no matter what they said about me, it would be worth it to stay with him. That it was my fault that I let her rile me up and how no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t stop the issues that my appearance was causing. That even though I didn’t express it over the phone, the longing I had of wanting him there with me today. That all I wanted was for him to pull me close enough to him that I didn’t know where I ended and he began. That no matter how much that lady upset me, I was worried about him. It wasn’t fair that people were still giving him shit for what happened during spring break and I felt like all I could offer him was some protection against those harsh words.
Eddie was quiet throughout all of this, letting me get it all out. Only prompting me to explain further at certain points. When I stopped to take another break, his free arm reached over to my injured one, and I moved it so he could push the sleeve up and see the faint marks on my lower arm. His name contrasted nicely with my skin, the letter painting a pretty picture against the hateful reminders that were left by the naive women that thought she could easily sway me.
“Sydney,” Eddie started, his voice incredibly soft. “I promise you that with what time you choose to spend with me, I am going to spend all of it making sure you understand what you mean to me. And not just surface level, you need to understand how much of you lives in me.”
“Eddie,” I leaned back, confused. “This is my fault. If I would have listened to you at the arcade, she never would have approached me today and got what she wanted. Who knows how many people she’s started spreading that shit to.”
“I could give two shits about what she’s saying.” Eddie said. He shifted slightly so he could brush his thumb over the mark, a warm feeling passing through me. He wrapped his around my wrist, bringing my arm up to his lips as he kissed over each of the purpling marks. My breath turned shallow, my face heating up at the intimacy about it all. “I care that she hurt you. That she thought for a second she could touch my mark.”
“Eddie-”
“Sydney,” Eddie interrupted me and dropped my arm back into my lap. Before I could protest, he was pushing himself a little further back in the van and reaching over to move me closer to him. He didn’t stop there, moving so I was seated in his lap, straddling him as I faced him. I didn't have time to react as my hands rested on his shoulders, his moving to grab at my waist. This position was new, so new that I felt like my heart was going to beat out of my chest. Sensing my anxiety, Eddie moved to rub a hand down my back as I relaxed, one of mine moving to play with his hair. “It is not and ever will be your fault. You want someone to blame? Blame Jason for turning this town against me, blame Powell for labeling me as a suspect so quickly. Blame Vecna because he’s the one that got us into this.”
“Baby,” Eddie swallowed hard, my eyes tracking his movement. “I need you to understand something and I'm tired of being worried of going too fast. So please just listen to me and trust me that I’m being completely honest with you?”
“I trust you,” I said quietly.
“I’ve waited my whole life for you.” Eddie started. “Watching my dad get locked up, moving in with Wayne, being treated like shit for being different in this conservative town. I knew that at one point none of that was going to matter because one day you would walk into my life and I’d have the one person that understood me. The one person that had a piece of myself in them. Then Vecna happened and as I after everyone put me together again, I kept thinking that this was it. I lived my whole life waiting for you and never got to met you this time.”
Eddie shifted, moving to pull the blanket around us as a strong breeze hit the van. He tugged it at my shoulders, pushing me to move closer to him.
“Hell, there were days that I could just be sitting there and I’d get this feeling. Like you were right beside me and your emotions were so strong. You were sad all the time, scared most of the time. I was so worried about the circumstances that I would be meeting you in, and I prayed to any God out there that you wouldn’t get involved with all of this. And then you just showed up, looking so scared on Hopper’s couch like you didn’t know where to go from there.”
Eddie shrugged and looked up at me. Very slowly he moved his hand up to cup my check, bringing his forehead to rest against mine. “I know that you haven’t known about me as long as I’ve known about you. I understand that where you grew up, you didn’t know that you had a soulmate waiting out there for you. But Sydney, I’m willing to wait forever for you. I’ll wait till you're ready to trust me, to trust that no matter what we might get ourselves into, that I’ll always get you out. But you have to let me in, baby. You have to understand that I’m always going to put you first. Just like you did today, putting me first and trying to stop that lady. I’ve waited too long in this lifetime to meet you, and I’ve paid my dues. You’re it for me, sweetheart. I’m going to spend every day that you let me trying to prove that to you.”
Eddie rubbed away a few tears that I didn’t realize had fallen. How could he feel so deeply? How did he just know that I was it for him? I wasn’t worth all this trouble; but if our positions were reversed, I’d feel the same way. If there was anyone in this world I could trust completely, it was him.
“Eddie,” I sniffled and moved a hand to rub at his marked wrist. A shiver running between us at the overwhelming feeling of each other. “I’m a lot. You’re going to get sick of me.”
“Nah,” Eddie teased as he pulled his face away from mine so he could meet my eyes. “I think it's going to be the other way around.”
“I’m sorry,” I felt my lip wobble as I tried to hold in some of the emotions that were trying to pour out. “I really want to trust this. I trust you. I-”
“Hey, hey” Eddie shushed as pulled back towards his chest, my face resting against his neck. “Don’t cry, sweetheart. I’m not trying to make you feel guilty. I just want you to understand that what I feel for you is so deep. And I’m not sad, because I know that one day you’ll feel that way for me too. I’m willing to wait lifetimes for you. I’m just lucky I got to experience you in this life too.”
He moved a hand to trace at my mark. “A piece of me is always going to live here, and a piece of you is going to always live in mine. We are together in this.”
“Together,” I repeated after him.
We could do that.
Hello my beautiful people! I'm sorry for the lack of updates, I hope this long chapter makes up for it! So the time jumps are about to start happening and then we are getting into the real guts of this story. How are we feeling? How are we feeling about Steve and Sydney's relationship? I wanted them to have a sibling bond, something close the what he was with Robin, but different. We all know that Robin is his twin flame, but that doesn't mean he can't have siblings. :)
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#eddie munson#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x oc#eddie munson series#stranger things series#eddie munson x fem!reader#time travel au#eddie munson fix it fic#jim hopper#steve harrington
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I had a rough week last week. Tuesday my dog gets sick, so I look up her symptoms. And bc I'm a crazy person, my mind automatically latched onto the worst possibility. So I spent three hours crying hysterically and having panic attacks bc I was so scared she would die. Then Wednesday I had to take my dog to vet and was still super stressed out. Thursday and Friday I have to deal with medicaid and disability paperwork. Saturday I had a panic attack so bad that I couldn't stop it and had to text my brother to come help me (he lives with me. we're too poor to live without a roommate, and we've basically lived together our whole lives, so it was whatever). Sunday morning I have a panic attack and can't leave my house to play my weekly dnd game bc the thought of spending hours with other people away from home was...bad. Sunday night, I got completely (and irrationally) terrified of being alone. I was so afraid that I called my mom, and of course she offers to come over. And I'm freaking out so bad I let her, even though it was late and I know she has to get up early for work. (She only stayed until my brother got back around 10:30)
BUT, today is a new day. I managed to get my blood work done today, and talk on the phone to my case worker, and pick up a pair of contacts from my eye doctor to wear until my order comes in. And I didn't have a panic attack. I mean, I still had to have my dad take me, bc leaving home alone isn't something I can do right now. (Mentally or physically. My brother's car broke down, and since he's the one who has a job, he's been using mine. i stg it's like a fucking family curse; every time someone is already in a financial bind, their car will break down.)
So I have decided to take the next few days to just relax. My two besties that I've been friends with since middle school both have kids with autism and they said I'm probably going through autistic burn-out. I'm pretty sure I'm autistic and my doctor thinks I'm somewhere on the spectrum, though on the lower support side. I'm gonna play bg3, and unwind. And try to work on some fic. (bc I have the next chapter of 16 Days damn near finished, and it's the last chapter that ties up the current plot, then there's an epilogue that takes place later that played out like a movie in my head, so writing it will be a breeze.)
Side note, did y'all know that some school systems still use 'high/low functioning'. I've had to say to my coworkers that autistic people would prefer not to use those terms. But it isn't surprising; one of my cousin's kids was literally diagnosed with Asperger's. Which has fallen under the autism spectrum disorder since like, forever ago. And also there was a TA in the autism classroom I worked in once who literally told me that autism was caused by demonic possession. I'm so glad I left the school system. Bc I eventually was going to fucking explode with rage after the way my kids were treated. (My students, not my actual kids. I don't have or want any)
Working in EC has really shown me how little the school system actually cares about helping the disabled; they will cut corners and do shit that 'technically' meets a kid's IEP, but doesn't do a damn thing to help them. And if you say something like, 'i don't think that counts' your coworkers will not be happy. But to a certain degree you can't be too mad, bc there is literally not enough time or resources to meet every child's needs, bc they cram as many kids in one EC classroom as possible, hire the minimum amount of TAs required by law and expect one teacher to be able to magically meet all their needs. My last job had 3 kids in wheelchairs in those tiny ass mobile units schools started using, that literally did not have room to move around, unless the other students stood up to let them get by, and sometimes even move their desk. We had multiple kids with autism. One of them stimmed by screaming, another was triggered by loud noises.
This post kinda went off on a tangent. Anyway, heads up to any parents who have kids starting school, make sure you get a copy of your child's IEP. If you think they aren't being serviced, contact your local Board of Education, and tell them that you have a child with an IEP who isn't receiving adequate services. Then threaten to sue them if they don't start providing your kid their services. It does not matter if you can actually afford to sue them or not, an IEP is a legally binding document. You have the right to sue, and most of the time the threat alone is enough to kick their ass into gear.
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