#I'm wishing you all the best! good luck on your endeavours too!

[cerise-on-top]

Could I request gn reader, who happens to be insecure about wearing feminine clothing, asking the 141 (+Laswell) if they would be willing to wear a dress with them?

(Take as much time as you need, don't overwork yourself lovie! Your writing is always the highlight of my day- I love it so much!! ❤️)

Hello! Thank you for reading my silly little writing, I always try my best! Wearing feminine clothing can be a bit rough, I get it, but I'm cheering you on, anon ✧｡٩(ˊᗜˋ )و✧*｡ I hope you'll feel more comfortable soon, because clothing like that can be absolutely adorable! Either way, thank you for the request, I hope it's to your liking!

TF141 and Laswell Wearing a Dress with GN!Insecure!Reader

Price: It would start out simple: You’d ask him to wear a dress with you and he would immediately say no. Dresses are simply not his style, he knows he would never look good in one. Besides, would there even be any in his size? A dress to accommodate someone as big and burly as him? He doesn’t think so, and he doesn’t think he’d feel comfortable in one either. It would take your heartbroken eyes, almost quivering voice, that would make him consider otherwise. He’ll apologize for being so harsh with you and will try to get his point across, he’s just not a dress guy. You’d need to explain your own situation to him, that you want to feel more comfortable wearing feminine clothing and you thought having someone to wear something along the lines of that with you would help. Go into detail, if you have him considering and weighing his options for up to a minute, followed by a deep sigh, you know you’ve won. Your happiness seems to even be over his own comfort. However, he will not wear a dress in public, only at home. He’s a captain and does have the mindset that something like a dress isn’t for guys like him. Not that he has a problem with guys wearing dresses, god knows he’s caught Gaz and Soap wearing them before, but he has a reputation to uphold. Whichever dress it ends up being, you’re the one to choose it since he has no idea what would fit someone like him in the first place. The only wish he has is that it ends up being beige or any other kind of brown. It’s what he’s used to the most. While it would take quite some time to get him to dress up the first time, he’s more willing after that. He does feel embarrassed to be wearing a dress, but it isn’t as bad as he thought it would be. Give him a heartfelt compliment about how good he looks and you’ll get him to blush.

Gaz: Although he’s only ever worn dresses as a joke, he does quite like the aesthetic of them. As mentioned previously, he and Soap have dressed up before simply because they felt like it and wanted to see if they would look good in a dress. So, yeah, he actually owns two or three dresses that he thinks fit him quite well, even though he never told you that. So don’t be surprised if he suddenly leaves the room and comes back with two dresses in his hands. You can choose which one he should wear, one is simply black and the other one is a pretty yellow. His favorite is the black one since it’s a bit more flowy and doesn’t hug his curves as much as the yellow one, but both look good on him. So, you don’t particularly need to explain your situation to him for him to be on board. Will make it a competition on who looks better in feminine clothing, even if he insists you always win. You’re just too pretty and beautiful to pass up. Considering he’s comfortable enough in his masculinity to do traditionally feminine things as well, he will pose for you if you ask him to, just to show off. He may not go out too far in public, your garden is probably as far as it goes, but if you really like seeing him in dresses then he might even consider a cute skirt as well. Anything to make you feel more comfortable in your skin. This guy is pretty flexible, if you’re roughly the same size and your dresses fit him, then he might wear them as well just to show you how good they look. Overall he really hypes you up, tries to do what he can to make you happy. After all, if someone like him, a sergeant in the SAS, can look good wearing feminine clothing, then so can you. 

Ghost: He raises an eyebrow upon hearing that suggestion. Why? He’s not as opposed as Price, but he wants to hear a good reason as to why someone like him, 1,95m with muscles to match, should wear a dress. Once you explain the situation to him, he’ll sigh, but comply. He doesn’t own a dress, he never even thought he’d find one that would a) fit him and b) look good on him. You’d probably need something tailored specifically to him since he’s a very broad guy. Once you’ve got something for him, though, he’s not particularly picky. You want him to wear a pink strawberry dress? Sure, why not. Very nonchalant about it, this is more about you than him, after all. Although it would look interesting, he’d go for a sleeveless dress since that way he won’t have to worry about him accidentally flexing the sleeves off. It likely wouldn’t be too easy to find something like it, but he would prefer a flowy dress as well, not everyone needs to see how well defined he is. Would probably like a small motif on the dress as well, nothing too big or exciting, though. Once he’s wearing that dress, he would check himself out in the mirror, wanting to see how he’d actually look. He wouldn’t look too bad in that dress, but then again, he’s a rather handsome man in general. While he would hope for you to agree that he doesn’t look too terrible, he wouldn’ take it to heart if you disagreed with him. Once you’re wearing a dress yourself, he’d probably blush a bit. It’s a rather unusual sight, but you look so good in one, it’s unbelievable. Ghost may not normally be the most touchy person, but he would offer his hand to you to help you with spinning around. He wants to see you from every angle, see just how lovely you look.

Soap: He has experimented with dresses before as well, just to goof around with Gaz, but he never would have thought he’d ever wear one again. He didn’t keep his dress, he gave it to Gaz and left it at that. So it was a bit surprising when you came up to him and asked him to wear a dress with him. He’d give you a goofy grin and ask you why, a bit nervous. Would you just make fun of him, being a guy who has worn a dress? As soon as you explain your reasoning, he calms down a bit and is down. He even takes more of an active role when you go dress shopping together, asking you if this and that would look good on him. Soap simply picks out something he likes, tries it on if it would fit, and takes it home if there’s no discomfort. If it was up to him, he’d go for something with frills, something big and exciting that would draw the attention of just about anyone. However, he couldn’t find something like that when he went shopping with you, so he opted for something smaller that hugged him nicely. Once he wears that dress, the only complaint he has about it is the fact he hadn’t shaved his legs, other than that he checks himself out in the mirror even more thoroughly than Ghost. He needs to know how hot he is in a dress, and you should tell him that as well. He isn’t uncomfortable at all and will walk throughout your home as though he was a model on the walkway. Laughs a bit when he sees his muscles bulging through the sleeves, but is still careful to not tear them. As soon as you walk in, his eyes are glued on you and he tells you just how gorgeous you look, how you should absolutely wear dresses more often than you do since you’re stunning and beautiful. He means all of it too, by the way, so it’s not just empty talk. You wearing a dress does something to him.

Laswell: As one can imagine, she has also worn dresses before, but they’re not her favorite article of clothing. In fact, if she can avoid them, she will. Not that she’s insecure or anything, she just thinks she looks better in a jacket. Skirts aren’t her cup of tea either. While she’s been on covert ops where she had to wear them, she’s glad she usually doesn’t have to. However, she isn’t entirely opposed to wearing them, so you can walk up to her just about any time and ask her to wear a dress with you. Might be a bit miffy when she’s wearing a dress in public, but your comfort comes first. She’s pretty good with fashion, so she can actually help you find something that looks very good on you, as well as on her. She’s so sweet about it too, giving you tips and showing you tricks on how to make it fit better and how to feel more comfortable. Since she’s not the tallest, most muscular person, it’s not too hard for her to find something. She would go for something with sleeves since it’s a bit warmer that way. If possible, she would go for something matching with you. Something flowy and nice that won’t make you too uncomfortable for the time being. When you’re wearing your dress, she’ll compliment you first and foremost. Laswell is good with words, so she’ll know exactly what to say to ease your anxiety. But even if you can’t shake off your discomfort immediately, don’t worry too much about it. If it makes you feel better, then Laswell will wear dresses with you more often so the both of you can get used to it. You’ll grow desensitized to it eventually, but it’s important to start small. Besides, if you really want to start wearing feminine clothing, Laswell will support you. She has the money to buy or tailor you just about anything, so the cutest, prettiest clothing will be yours if you allow her to get it for you.

[moonshine-nightlight]

Hello! I Just wanted to let you know that I LOVED the published ver. of "Don't Shoot the Messenger". And I was so excited to hear that Dale and Sana's story might get published too.

At first I was really unsure about getting the book, as I didn't want to be disappointed if the changes made didn't translate well compared to the original. BUT YOU KNOCKED MY EXPECTATIONS RIGHT OUT OF THE WATER!! IT WAS SO GOOD!!

Anyway, just wanted to let you know that I'm so excited for your future projects. And I wish you luck on your future publishing endeavours because I will be buying all future published books by you. And no one can stop me haha >:D

I also wanted to ask if there's a chance that any of your other previous works will also be published? Of course it's a huge effort of time and resources to publish something. But I do hold out hope that I might one day hold Heshi's story in my hands because truthfully it's such a comfort to me and I go back to it periodically to reread. I love that snakey boi. NO PRESSURE THO. If that's not in the cards, just the fact that it exists as a story is wonderful. Thank you so much for all the writing you do.

anyway, bye

@annjo-wolfe

hi! thanks so much! i really liked what DSM actually was and focused on my own edits and that of my editors just honing it to be the best version of itself - so i'm glad that came through and you liked it!

if ur interested in too much info about my self-publishing plans, pls see under the read more

Dale and Sana's story definitely will be self-published,its just a matter of when. it's also probably gonna get more tweaks than DSM due to the length and the way the story evolved over 2 years lol

thank you so much for your support and encouragement with publishing! i'm so happy people are excited about actually buying my stories lol

As for previous short stories that getting published, the answer is yes, i do have plans to publish them as well, they're just a lower priority for multiple reasons. firstly, me and everyone wants NWWD the most so its #1.

For 'Finally Woken' i actually already have the first 2 chapters converted to 3rd POV, however, its shorter than DSM and so would cost nearly as much to have edited but would sell for less (and amazon will try to tell me the spine is too narrow lol) so my current thoughts are to bundle it with 'Selfish' (helpfully already in 3rd person) and make a Naga Novella (called like 'Tangled Up in Tails' or something lol) with both of them in it so i can release it priced similarly to DSM.

For 'Sacrifice', i actually have plans to make that a 5 novella series about different forgotten deities returning to the same town, with 'Sacrifice' likely being offered as a cheaper, first book about a month or so before the second is published to get people into the series. the rest of the novellas would likely not go up on tumblr/AO3 at all and would only be published. i'd like to use this hypothetical series to see how that sort of model would work for me. i've planned out the 5 novellas to some extent but nothings really written yet besides 'Sacrifice'. as a complete project, its very low on my list after everything i'll b posting here and NWWD publishing, so since 'Sacrifice' is tied to that, its not likely to get published anytime soon.

For 'Snapped', i'd likely do something similar to 'Finally Woken' - write another short Sci-Fi/Alien story and bundle them together for publishing. However, i dont currently have anything written that would work so that's also a low priority evn if 'Snapped' is already 3rd POV.

I'm really excited to self-publish my work, but its expensive and what I've made from DSM has come nowhere close to covering my costs and likely won't. the only good thing is basically all the costs are up-front so its easy to jsut keep the books out there and making money when ppl buy it. i have a good job and am happy to spend my money to get my work out there and hope over time self-publishing will break-even, but that will take years at a minimum so it'll be slow going in the beginning.

my goal is to get everything self-published so it'll just be a matter of time - i too want to hold a copy of Heshi's story in my hands lol

thank you for all your support and giving me a chance to ramble about all my self-publishing plans!

[wisteria-grows-here]

Hiya.

I'm an ex-jw (tho since I'm 17 I still live in the house, I just refuse meetings and all)

And I've come to the conclusion that a lot of my fear of the future comes with the 'the end is coming' 'armaggedon is coming VERY soon!'. And that's giving me a lot of stress and anxiety with yannow, climate change, politics and honestly all this horrible stuff- like I feel like it's actually happening and I'm petrified.

And I was wondering if you ever felt this way? And if you had a way to deal with it? It's tiring me out honestly and I just need to live and I can't with all of that fear looming over my brain.

Also- don't know where you live and all but with the heat at the moment, be sure to stay inside, hydrate and eat food! ❤️ good luck on your endeavours

Hi, thank you so much for reaching out with this question. It's taken me this long to respond because I've been trying to come up with the perfect answer for you, and honestly I don't know if there is one.

I, too, struggle with this anxiety a lot, especially considering how important nature and the environment is to me personally. I do my best to remind myself that there is no connection between climate change and Armageddon, that they are two separate things. One designed to educate the public on the Earth's wellbeing and the other to instill fear and ultimate loyalty towards an oppressive group. Remembering all the many times the Witnesses have declared the end of the world (in the 1920s and the 1970s though I'm sure there's more that's just what I know off the top of my head) and nothing happened, everyone lived on is something to keep in mind.

As for handling climate change in a personal manner, I try to take time each day to do something kind to the environment, no matter how small. Personally I don't have the resources to do a lot, like I can't start my own garden or ditch my car for a bike, so instead I focus on what I can do. I can pick up liter off the street and only drink from reusable bottles. And most importantly, I can educate myself about the environment, not only on how to best help it but also anything about nature. It deepens my appreciation for even the smallest things in this world like a little ant or the single tree in my backyard.

Because you are in a vulnerable position, learning about yourself outside the cult, I would focus on yourself first. Because after all, I truly believe humans are the most valuable thing in nature. Take time to heal yourself first before thinking about the rest. From this ask alone I can tell you are a greatly emphatic person and I have no doubt that you are already doing great things for the environment!

Sorry again for how long it's taken me to respond, I hope this helps and I wish you the absolute best!

[pico-digital-studios]

Into, Across and Beyond! Scripting: A Leader's Doubt

Sometime after More than One Universe and Funkinverse, Gwen Stacy and Gracie were both walking through a dark void, having been summoned there by EV!Sonic.

Gracie: So, what do ya think the blue hedgehog's wanting us for?

Gwen: Maybe to discuss the whole multiverse mumbo-jumbo stuff, I presume. I mean, we've both seen a lot of what it all has to offer, and fought some of the worst out there.

Gracie: True dat. I guess you and me might not be too different after all, huh?

Gwen: Yeah. That's one way to think about it.

They saw EV!Sonic up ahead, looking at many screens and floating panels, with the present (at the time) voyage of Sonic Prime and Shadow Prime in the middle.

Gwen: Is this your multiverse?

EV!Sonic: Yeah. Quite a crazy concept, isn't it? It's something a good handful of us are aware of and know plenty about, but at the same time... it's something we know frighteningly little of.

Gracie: And that screen closest to us?

EV!Sonic: That's the "Prime" versions of me and Shadow. Essentially the focal point from which our universes, including mine, stemmed from.

Gracie: The Earth-Prime Theory? We don't have that back in my stretch of the multiverse. Then again, likely because "Boyfriend Prime" is consistently disconnected from all of us.

Gwen: And if there was a Spider-Man Prime, like in those comics, I doubt he'd be linked to any of our endeavours. So what did you bring us over for?

EV!Sonic: Well, I... I heard about what happened with those "Societies" in your corners of the multiverse, and that must really suck.

Gwen: It does. I swore my own group against Miguel and his strike force after Miles was the eye-opener I sorely needed.

Gracie: Same thing with me and Salty.

EV!Sonic: Well, I'd been starting up my own Society a few months ago, but I've been aiming to avoid the flaws Miguel and Cam have been doing, as I witnessed before I tried to catch The X before. Thing is...

He sighed in worry, looking towards them with concern.

EV!Sonic: I'm worried that I could screw things up in the long-run, and I don't want to fall into the same trap those two did, or worse. I just want to be a good leader for all these guys and not hold them in one place for so long.

Gwen: I mean, you do have them working part-time, right?

EV!Sonic: Yeah. Three days a week each at maximum, with our busiest being Fridays and Saturdays. And I don't work full-time, either, since we've two leaders.

Gracie: Well, our advice? Have good therapists on standby, treat everyone with utmost respect, don't enforce canon events, and things should be smooth sailing!

Gwen: Mhm. And if members need the rights, they're more than welcome to shuffle away from their work if need be. I mean, you guys in your universes, from what I heard, aren't usually alone in your work, right?

EV!Sonic: Yeah, not usually. We always have friends available to help hold the fort for us if their base heroes are here or helping at other multiverse corners. I mainly called you two here for your input, since I know you both had it horribly in those Societies.

Gwen: Yeah... My father quitting the police force was proof enough that canon events can be averted.

Gracie: Yeah. I guess that served as motivation for Benjamin as well to side with us in stopping The X.

EV!Sonic: Thanks, girls. I really appreciate it.

Gwen: Anytime! Guess we got some good advice out of our experiences. Heh, even though we're not the absolute best at it.

EV!Sonic: Yeah. Since your faction managed to severely weaken The X before, Gracie, I think there might be a chance that my faction's able to apprehend him. At least, with some backup this time.

Gracie: Yeah, good call. Even with me, Salty, XML and Goldie couldn't beat The X all on our own when he was getting stronger. So I wish you guys the best of luck with it.

EV!Sonic: Thanks. I mean, he was based on us, so we know what to expect out of him. You two should head back to your dimensions shortly, though. Your places might need you.

Gwen: Yeah, that's a good call. Let's swing it out of here!

Gwen thwipped a pair of webs to make her leave.

Gracie: So, you hoping to be a better place for Benjamin to work part-time?

EV!Sonic: I am, yeah, considering his ties to someone within the SEGAVerse. Well, see you around, Gracie.

Gracie: See ya! Oh, erm, I didn't catch your name before.

EV!Sonic (with a soft smile): Sonic the Hedgehog. And I'm not the only one.

They shared a nod to each other with respect before Gracie left.

[pterawaters]

I’ve just finished my reread of Mr. Sandman and 💜💙💚💛🧡❤️ (that rainbow was completely accidental - it was supposed to be a random collection of hearts). It’s so good. Thank you for sharing it with all of us. I love the way you show everyone slowly changing as time passes and yet keeping them true to their character. I love Jenny and Charlie and the whole extended Byers family. I love how everyone ends up happy and as normal as they can be. I love how Will and Jonathan and Joyce have powers too. I love the ingenuity behind Execugen and literally everything about Cedarville. I love how, even knowing that everyone gets a happy ending, I was still tense and on edge at multiple places in the story.

I wish you a wonderful week ahead and the best of luck in regards to writing endeavours ✨

Okay, so I got this ask when you sent it like a week ago and I haven't replied yet because I was hoarding it in my ask box and reading it at least twice a day. Thank you so much for sending such a thoughtful, touching message! I'm so glad you enjoyed Mr. Sandman again! It's a story that's obviously close to my heart, and it means the world to have your support!

[starglitterz]

cynosure. (xv)

─── chapter 15 ! ~ cynosure.

summary; you and xiao are genmates under the famed streamer company genshin impact. the chemistry between the two of you is undeniable, and your fanbases absolutely love your collaborations. but when you both start meeting up offline more and more, your connection starts to deepen past just harmless flirting and playful banter. with these real feelings starting to affect both your job and reputation online, how will you two react when your relationship becomes the internet’s cynosure?

a/n: i hope you enjoy this chapter and that it provides a satisfying ending for this rollercoaster of a series :] thank u for all the support on cynosure, i love u guys and i'm so grateful to be part of such a sweet community <3

warnings; suggestive

previous.┃masterlist.

please reblog ! it helps a lot :)

biggest thank u to; @hurricanectar & @noctua-koi for always talking abt cynosure w me :) i became friends w both of you through this series and i'm so glad we've become so close!! i love u both sm <3

livestream !

y/n: hi everyone! sorry for the unscheduled stream, but thank you very much to all of you who decided to tune in!

xiao: yes, thank you. so as the title of this video suggests, the two of us have an important announcement to make.

COMMENTS ylovrr; omg what could it be siluc; i mean the two of them r tgt for it so im p sure we all alrdy k xiaoxiaoo; ahhh i hope it isn't anything bad :< kazu-topia; it should be fine (i think)

y/n: i think chat is going to murder us if we keep dragging it out, so, xiao, would you like to do the honours?

xiao: me?! didn't we agree it was going to be you?!

y/n: i changed my mind! *sticks out tongue*

xiao: ._.

COMMENTS auradragon199; THEY ARE SO CUTE!!!!!!!! venvens; what if them bantering was my final straw,,, it's too wholesome :sob: dendrobivms; i want to marry both of them atp LSKDJSK

xiao: fine. since y/n has very kindly thrown me under the bus, i'm just going to say it - the two of us are dating.

y/n: ?!?!?!

xiao: why do you sound so surprised?? you asked me to say it!

y/n: I KNOW!! it just sounds so cool when you say it out loud like that.

xiao: ...

COMMENTS hamayumis; AHHHHHHHHH XIAOYN REAL OFFICIAL noctua-koi; OFMWAKJDKJSA THIS IS NOT A DRILL EVERYONE I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL XIAOYN IS REAL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sprayio; aww xiao's blushing :>>> so cute !! hurricanectar; theyre perfect for each other :))) contentedbean; yes they deserve the world noirkkat; my scrunklies <3

y/n: holy archons, thank goodness you're all taking it well. not to exaggerate, but i was honestly terrified that most of you would hate us.

xiao: mhmm. but even if you did, that wouldn't change anything between y/n and i. i've been stupid enough to let hate comments affect me once, and it will never happen again. i love y/n, and since i'm lucky enough to call her my girlfriend, i'm not going to allow anything to ruin that.

y/n: aw, xiao! i always knew you were head over heels for me.

xiao: yeah, yeah, whatever. anyways, if you have any questions we'll be more than happy to answer them.

COMMENTS 120802; xiao won't meet y/n's eyes... looks like someone's down bad anon; will this affect your streaming?

y/n: nope, not at all! xiao and i are still very much our own people, so our schedules for streaming won't change at all.

xiao: except for maybe a few more off-collabs with just the two of us.

y/n: *pretends to whisper to chat* xiao's just saying that 'cause he wants me to stay over. *wink*

xiao: I AM NOT!

y/n: *laughter* next question!! 'have you heard that all of scaramouche's social medias have been deleted?'

xiao: ...no, i haven't. nevertheless, i wish him the best of luck in all his future endeavours. there is no bad blood between us and i genuinely hope he's happy.

y/n: exactly! also just a reminder, please make sure not to send any hate to anybody who was involved or a fan of scaramouche. we've moved on from that chapter of our lives, and we'd like to leave it in the past.

COMMENTS scaramew; theyre so mature omfg sohyuki; another day another slay as per usual alatusxiaoo; mwahhh i hope the pillow of whoever asked that qs is warm on both sides kdaehara; them. that's it that's the comment tofuthoma; screaming sobbing crying rn /pos normalisthenewnorm; hmm what else is there to even ask cynokine; i'm assuming scara had to either delete his socials or go to court and he picked the better option test-tube; soooo, any plans to play two-player games more in future?

y/n: great question! personally, i'm looking forward to human fall flat, or maybe fall guys!

xiao: or maybe stardew valley could be cool. or even phasmophobia.

y/n: isn't that a horror game?! xiao, not everyone has your ability to be utterly unafraid in the face of jumpscares.

xiao: hey! is that an insult or a compliment?

y/n: hehehe, i'll never tell!

COMMENTS afchicken; theyre so sweet im going to get diabetes istg yelansrightarmpit; AWKJDJAKSJDKAWKDJSAKD BARKS LOUDLY thomacrumbs; me when they <3_<3 goblefunk; xiaoyn the world xiaophobic; I LOVE THEM SO MUCH !!!!!!! c02z; so, how does it feel being the hottest streamer couple on the planet?

xiao: on the planet...? well it's mostly y/n.

y/n: xiao! don't say stuff like that!

xiao: it's just the truth!

y/n: *swats him* anyways, you're very kind for saying so. and personally i think it's thanks to xiao, and it hasn't been that long yet but so far dating him is very fun!

xiao: dating y/n is very fun too. she's an amazing person and i'm honoured to be hers.

y/n: how can you say such cute stuff with such a calm face?! i swear i'd kiss you right now if we weren't streaming.

xiao: then maybe we should end the stream here, because if i'm being honest i'd like to kiss you too.

y/n: archons, you're lucky i love you. we aren't ending the stream yet, we've still got more questions to answer!

xiao: hmph. *pouts* fine.

...

y/n: so anyways, i think we'll end the stream here! thank you so much to everyone who joined, i'm really glad to know that you all support our decision and we hope that you'll continue to watch our streams!

xiao: yes. thank you for the kind words, have a good day.

y/n: byebye!

COMMENTS nurserinnn; that was the best stream ever!! yanfeishere; brooo xiaoyn has my whole heart omg aijlin; if they don't get eternal happiness im rioting van-chii; them !!!!!!!!!!!!

*stream ends*

y/n: xiao, holy archons, my hands are shaking so much. aHHH i was so nervous!

xiao: you did great, dove. *holds y/n's hands* i'm so happy we did that.

y/n: me too! i must be the luckiest girl in the world; our fans will still enjoy our content, and i get to date the person i love.

xiao: *under his breath* you're so cute.

y/n: i'm right next to you, y'know. i can hear you.

xiao: ?!

y/n: haha, i'm just teasing! i think you're super duper mega awesomely cute too, xiao!

xiao: *ears turn red* it's getting late, we should go get ready for bed. you need to get enough rest, especially after your travelling.

y/n: okay then, boyfriend. i call dibs on using the shower first.

xiao: *swallows* go ahead... girlfriend.

y/n: AWWW YOU'RE LITERALLY SO ADORABLE!!!

xiao: STOP, JUST GO SHOWER ALREADY! tsk, no respect for the adepti.

irl !

"hey y/n, i used the other bathroom, so you can take your time and you don't have to worry about rushing so i can use this one," xiao hesitates slightly before knocking on the bathroom door to let you know. if he's being honest, he can't tell if he's awake right now because all this feels like the best kind of dream possible. sure, you've slept over at his house before, but this time the two of you are an official couple! "it's okay, i'm already done anyways," you reply cheerfully before opening the door and grinning at him. as xiao looks at you, he hopes that if this is all a dream, he gets to sleep a little longer.

"you look really pretty," xiao murmurs, swallowing the lump in his throat which miraculously forms whenever he's around you. he has always been soft-spoken and quiet, preferring to keep his thoughts to himself instead of voice them out loud, but when you're here, this quality is amplified tenfold. everything he wants to say to you is frozen on the tip of his tongue, and he can only gape at you like a goldfish and pray to any deity listening that somehow you'll understand what he's trying to convey. you twirl, allowing the fabric of his shirt to swoosh around your legs, "aww, thanks! this is the shirt you left out for me, right?" your boyfriend nods, and you swear he looks so adorable when he's too shy to make eye contact. little do you know he's thinking the exact same thing, except it's more so about how you're drowning in his shirt - he knew it was a good idea to buy the biggest size, too-large clothes are always the most comfortable, and if he gets to see you like this that's just an added benefit.

"actually, dove, can i kiss you?" the words slip out before xiao can stop himself, before he can filter them like he usually does. perhaps this is just the effect you have on him, reducing him to an incoherent mess who acts before he thinks. but as you smile, "of course," and move forward to kiss him, xiao thinks that maybe it isn't that bad. your hands travel upwards to tangle in his hair as you push his back against the bed, tugging on the jade strands as you deepen the kiss. xiao can barely think clearly at this point, his mind has been wiped to a clean slate, every thought replaced with the feeling of your lips as he does his best to memorise everything about you. hands gripping your waist tightly, his golden eyes flicker from yours to your lips, fixing every inch of your features into his mind. his thumb smooths across your cheek, admiring the way you lean into his touch, eyes fluttering shut as you nuzzle into his warmth.

the two of you have come so far, xiao thinks to himself as his fingers idly dance over your skin, unknowingly igniting a trail of fire in their wake. throughout everything you've both been through, xiao definitely knows that there were things he could have done better, ways he could have reacted better, but if varying the method won't lead to the scenario where he gets to kiss you like this right now, xiao thinks that he wouldn't change anything for the world. he's learned so much these past few months, from healing himself after his past and convincing himself to be brave enough to step into a new future, and it's all thanks to you. you, who coincidentally strolled into his life and captured his heart and attention without even trying, you, who gave him a second chance even when he thought he was unforgivable, you, who was willing to accept him for his flaws and love him nevertheless. it was always you.

as your mouth sears across his collarbone, xiao cups your face, tilting it up to look at him, "y/n, i love you so much." your expression relaxes into a smile, affection glimmering in your irises as you gaze at him with so much tenderness in your eyes, "i love you too, xiao." his hands slide down your torso to rest at your hips, but his stare is focused on yours still, "you know i'll always be there for you, right?" "mhmm," you mumble, pressing your lips to his once more, matching the heat building up between the two of you with an equally passionate kiss. xiao is helpless to do anything but melt into it, enjoying the feeling of your lips moulding together perfectly like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle slotting into place. you're making his head spin with just your lips - he's always been at your mercy, for you've got him wrapped around your little finger; all his attention, all his admiration, and all of him.

when you pull away, xiao leans his forehead against yours, amber irises shining with fondness, "after all, you're my cynosure."

a/n; so we're finally at the end, huh? it's been a pretty wild ride over these 8 months ever since i published the cynosure masterlist as a surprise on 18th july last year :') i never even dreamed it would gain this much popularity or that so many people would like reading a streamer au, but i'm really glad it did. i've met countless wonderful people through this story whom i'm proud and lucky to call my friends until now. i just want to say that i'm so so so thankful for all of you who gave cynosure a chance. ily, i quite literally wouldn't be anywhere on tumblr without you guys <3 also, all the fan accs in this chapter are people whom i love + people who i've recognised interact frequently w cynosure posts !! i hope it's okay that i used your urls without permission, tell me if you'd like me to remove it. do stay tuned for my future projects too mmkay? anyways, as per usual i'm still finishing cynosure chapters at stupidly late hours, so i'll be heading to bed now. goodnight everyone, take care of yourself, and please do lmk what you thought about this chapter / cynosure as a whole! i'd love to hear your thoughts on it :> mwahhh byebye !! <3

taglist; @noirkkat / @c02z / @hojichangel / @glazelilyy / @oreoz-unfortunately / @tiny-aroace / @xiaophobic / @test-tube / @120802 / @storytravelled / @mirikusashes / @ben6ett / @oliviasslut / @bluexiao / @lunachelly / @aelatus / @mimion / @akiiyukii / @angelhxneyy / @give-xiao-almond-tofu / @abyssheart / @xuanya / @normalisthenewnorm / @viagiraffe / @fuhuashandholder / @astersg4rden / @dilucbar / @nachotrash / @childe-support / @kinekyuu / @axerrri / @ventirain / @kait-is-always-late / @venvens / @celestair / @rim0na / @indecisivehusky / @nurserinnn / @ariesreii / @saving-for-xiao / @hellokittykuroo / @auradragon199 / @xiaoszn / @liarchive / @hurricanectar / @berryqueue / @noctua-koi / @yunaholics / @yoimimi / @http-mewchuu

usernames in bold cannot be tagged. pt 2 of the taglist will be tagged in an rb after i wake up :)

general masterlist.

© starglitterz 2022. do not repost or modify in any way.

[newtonsheffield]

Gosh molly Im not sure what I can say/do to help. But I’m sending you the warmest wishes and lots of love, and I hope these hard times pass soon xxx

Anonymous asked:

Sorry to hear you’re going through a hard time (please don’t ever apologise for it tho), sending you lots of love and hugs xx

Anonymous asked:

Sending you lots of love and good wishes. Life drags you down at times - feels dark and heavy. I feel that too. I try to hold on to hope and to assume positive intent. Of course I frequently fail in this endeavour but I try as best I can to get back up and keep on going. Hopefully we can all stay above water, feel more good than bad and find some peace and comfort in this unsettled world. Just know your being in this world and the difference you make is a beautiful, amazing gift. Xxx

Anonymous asked:

I’m sorry to hear that you’ve been having a rough time. I hope everything works out soon and sending you lots of good vibes! 💞

Anonymous asked:

oh, molly - i'm so sorry to hear that! sending you good vibes - take care of yourself and know that you've got cheerleaders on your side all around the world. i hope you're only spending time here if it's helpful to you - please don't ever let us guilt-trip you into focusing on kathony/fic, if you need to be focusing elsewhere. hugs (only if you're a hugger)!

Anonymous asked:

please don't be sorry for being sad! we all love you a lot, and I'm sending some luck your way for things to be better soon

Yeah, I'm okay, I'm just under a bit of stress right now, the middle of the year is always a difficult time in my work and life and I'm just struggling a little I guess.

I think I'm just... coming to the realisation that my life isn't where I want it to be or maybe thought it should be and I'm just trying to do some stuff for me right now. I'm trying to start caring for myself again in a lot of small ways.

This is something I enjoy and honestly I don't think I'm posting much less on here, honestly, but percentage wise I'm probably responding to less asks. To give you guys a rough number I probably get about... 20-30 asks a day. There's close to 4000 in my inbox right now. Running this blog is a full time job, or could be, and it's hard because I read all of your messages and I want to respond to them all but I'm only one person.

So I'm trying, I'm just having a hang in there month right now

Thank you all for your support

[starshiningsirius]

Dr. Jerkyll and Mr. Hyde (Yandere Leech twins x reader)

An au idea I had came to mind based off @yandere-wishes Victorian twst story and @yandere-romanticaa 's Extraterrestrial story.

I love these two eels and I'm late on their birthday but it's still their birthday for me.

The clear moonlit sky shown brightly over the waters of the ocean. As yet another scream echoed within the streets of a supposedly vacant city.

The detective woke up with a start but not from the scream, but from the ringing of her phone. A report she had been writing stuck to her face from the humid atmosphere. She picked it up getting a few details from Idia, who was panicking on the other side of the line. Considering he worked in the criminal department at the desk and didn't have to see any bodies whatsoever you would think he'd be calm when trying to say what happened.

"Calm down Idia. Tell me what happened?" Her voice was gentle since yelling wouldn't help his nerves.

"Therewasanothermurder! Theyclaimedanothervictim!" He spoke so fast that his words wouldn't be understood by most but she was used to this with him and every word was caught by the detective's ears.

"Where's the crime scene?"

"In front of Sam's shop on Crystal Road, Ms. Y/n L/n." The voice of Idia's younger sibling popped up a contrasting his older brother's cowardly behavior.

He wanted to be just like his older brother so he spent his days in the office with him. Though there were times when Idia tapped out and his brother had to step in.

"Thank you both. I'll head their now." She hung up after hearing a farewell from both brothers.

The candle was long out and she grabbed her gun, notebook, and pen within the darkness, before venturing out the confines of her home.

When she got there a crowd had surrounded one spot in particular.

Cater was already there taking photos of the scene as it was his job being a forensic photographer.

"Hey, hey! Y/n's here, make way!" The crowd parted for her as soon as he announced her presence.

Whispers were muttered as she passed through into the middle of the crime scene. Mostly about how she hadn't caught this killer yet. She ignored them though and went on to meet with her coworker.

"It never ceases to amaze me how your always here first Cater, if anything you should be a suspect." She started off saying to her compatriot.

"Can't help it if I want to stay informed dectective, I just want to stay informed before anyone else." His smile on his face was out of place as he took another photo of the corpse.

"Who was it this time?"

"Such a poor fate to befall dear Monsieur Heart." A new voice joined in the conversation.

"Rook, I see you've arrived but can I get their name please?" The detective said sighing at the theatrics of her friend.

"His name was Ace Trappola, I can't imagine how Monsieur Spade must be feeling about this tragedy." Rook feigned a sorrowful look.

"Oh yeah A-Deuce kun were inseparable, I feel sorry for him. Think he knows already?"

"If there as inseparable as you say Cater then I suppose not, he isn't here yet otherwise I'm sure he'd cause a scene." She noted.

"That doesn't make him a suspect though right? I mean sure he's been a suspect in many crimes before, but Deuce kun far too soft!" Cater was a bit frantic at the thought alone.

"No, I doubt it was him he wouldn't want to disappoint his mother with something as vulgar as murder, he cares for her far too much to do that." That calmed his worries.

"You know I've heard Monsieur Heart have many laments on how his delivery to Roi d' Rose-" Cater didn't let Rook finish.

"RIDDLE?! No way he did this! Have you seen how strict his mother is? Just waltzing in their office and so much as suspecting her son is a one way ticket to hearing her screams! Besides I doubt his mother would even let him out this late anyway, he's always about following the rules set in place for him." Cater says with an imaginary sweat that could have formed to express his fear and anxiety.

"True, and I can't afford another headache from that lady, but we could get some valuable intel from him about Trappola's demeanor the past few days seeing as it may be a pattern in the serial killers motives."

"What about Sam? He's gotta know something considering the murder occurred in front of his shop." Cater's gaze went toward the shop to the right of them.

"Ah the shop keep, a wonderfully eccentric man with many secrets." Rook stated his opinion of him from what he gathered on his own free time.

"Says the French man whose got info on everyone from stalking them on the street." The detective says shaking her head at the strange man next to her who happily smiled at her statement.

"I wouldn't call it that more so getting to know my prey more personally." She sighed hearing his reply.

"A crime analyst such as yourself is such a good cover up!" Cater's response made her sigh once again.

She shook her head toward her coworkers. They took their job in a mild manner but beyond that they did do well to get it done. Even though the means of how they did it were very much questionable in her eyes.

She looked toward the ground seeing the body of the former male right on the cusp of adulthood. His orange hair was a bit disheveled and the looks of shock on his face petrified in time.

"Ah, the dectective is already using those perceptive eyes of hers." Cater's words fell on deaf ears as she was examining the crime scene closely.

"As expected of Reine de la déduction, such dedication in her work. Très bien!"

Their bones were disfigured, just like the last person. No one has this type of strength it didn't make any sense. The only lead that was given but she noticed a glowing substance in his mouth.

"Cater, Rook, I need some confirmation. Out of all the other times these cases have been appearing there weren't any liquid substances to be found beside the occasional blood right?"

"You are correct."

"Yeah, nothing else to be found from what I could see." They both confirmed her suspicion.

She had to go talk to Jade again, but first thing tomorrow she had to interrogate Sam, as well as Riddle Rosenhearts which was sure to be headache on her part.

* * *

His mother was an agitation to say the least. During her entry into his mother's office and upon stating the reason for her entry, Riddle's mother had already hated her the moment she finished speaking. Yelling and hollering about how her son would never commit such a crime even though the dectective never stated he was a suspect in the slightest.

She only asked to question the behavior of Mr.Trappola as of late before he met his end. He was under no suspicion whatsoever but she wasn't having that and kept screeching until her son had to calm her down.

It was much more pleasant afterwards but the headache Y/n had in the early morning just listening to her screeching didn't disappear throughout the whole endeavour.

Just before she bid him farewell he apologized deeply for his mother's behavior with a red face of complete embarrassment. To which she replied it was alright and thanked him for his time. Unfortunately though she had to bear that burden on her own as Rook and Cater had their own jobs to partake in analyzing the other crimes and investigating the trend within the series of murders. It was unfair but that was life. By the time she exited their establishment it was already in the afternoon a little after lunch.

Next was to venture to Sam's shop which was right where the crime had taken place. The body was already removed and taken to forensics, so the only thing left was a broken street lamp.

"Ah, well if isn't the dectective, I believe I already know the pleasure of seeing you here on this fine day," He tipped his hat to her with a smile on his face.

"Afternoon to you too Sam. I would like to acquire any information you have on the murder of Ace Trappola that occurred last night, in front of your establishment."

"Such a shame the little demon, was too young to have bite the dust. But you know as well as I my information comes with a price."

"A thousand madols should suffice a description of what you saw right?" She questioned handing a stack of the paper currency to which he smiled at.

"All I know is that last night was certainly something else. I heard a smash of a lamppost outside my window, up on the second floor. Shop was already closed though. When I looked down I saw what looked to be two silhouettes outside the window. One way taller than the other though, I recognized of Trappola on the ground and something glowed within the hands of the killer, a vial of sorts. He poured it down the throat of the little demon, but Trappola put up a good fight before it was over."

"Over? Can you specify?"

"As in he was left on the ground for dead, it looked like he was choking on whatever was consumed. The killer held him tightly after he realized he was choking. It was similar to a hug but one that was more deadly than a normal one. After he dropped him to the ground and walked away laughing hysterically at who he squeezed."

"And you weren't going to go to the police to inform that you had witnessed the murderer of a serial killer!" Her voice had raised a bit in volume as her agrevated state didn't alleviate since earlier in the day.

"I'm not one to get involved in others private life, Dectective. I've got a business to run." She understood his point though exhaling a sigh through her nose.

"Right. If you want to keep your life you keep your mouth shut. Alright I thank you for the intel." The dectective closed her notebook after writing down many notes on the case.

"Pleasure doing business with ya, Dectective! Best of luck to you as well! You'll be needing it more than anyone." She was only able to hear the first part of it not when his cheery demeanor went away.

She walked out to her final destination of the day, a close friend of hers. His name was Jade Leech, a smart man that excelled in pharmaceuticals just as did Riddle's mother but in a more different sense. His potions were revolutionary with in the subject of alchemy and his botany skills and knowledge made his fame and fortune.

He's helped her on countless cases before, with his expertise in potions it aided in knowing key components to solving head bangers such as this.

As she reached the door of his manor she knocked before waiting a moment or two to see his smile.

"Dectective, how pleasant it is to see you today." He flashed his signature smile toward me, with pearly teeth straight and white.

"It's nice to see you too Jade. May I come in?"

"Your always welcome here, though I must say you do look exhausted how about I put on some tea?" He made way for me to step in.

"You don't have to Jade."

"I insist, naturally I should show good hospitality to all my visitors. Your free to take a seat wherever you like."

"So how are your mushrooms doing?" She said starting up conversation on a favorable topic for him. He was in the kitchen that connected to the empty dining room, that opened the way to the living room where she sat.

"I imagine you didn't come here just to speak on how my mushrooms are doing alone?" He spoke it in the form of a question but he already knew the answer with a knowing smile on his face that she couldn't see but knew he had.

"You are right, my apologies, I actually require your aid with a substance that could be the key in solving the recent serial killings." She watched as he walked in with two plates in hand.

"It's fine, I'm glad you can come to me for help." He served the two plates, one in front of her and the other in front of himself.

They had pasta on both of them with the mushrooms I mentioned. It smelled heavenly. Her stomach growled loudly which caused Jade to laugh lightly.

"I'm assuming you haven't eaten much of anything have you?"

"No I had too much work to do today." She blushed looking away from him.

He sighed making a small 'tsk' noise.

"You have got to take better care of yourself, that dedication of yours is admirable but otherwise you'll drive yourself into an early grave with that sort of work ethic." He chastised.

"Ah, I just don't have the time these days, I'm sorry for all the trouble you have to go through for me." Her eyes traveled toward the food with a slight guilty feeling.

"You speak as if your some sort of burden on me, quite the contrary I worry for your safety and yours alone. You may be a skilled dectective but, I care for your well being first."

Her face grew to an intolerable temperature that would make people think she was sick. She was very much surprised by his words. The first time anyone has ever said anything that endearing to her in a while.

So to ignore the feeling of her heart racing she picked up her plate kept her eyes trained on it. Her expression looked to resemble pouting.

"L -let's just eat then shall we?" She stumbled on her first word internally cursing as she heard Jade's laughter.

. . .

After they had eaten Y/n had spent some time explaining to Jade the situation with Trappola's murder and handed him the vile of the substance found at the crime scene.

He listened attentively and chimed in few times for clarity. He said he would have the analysis of the substance done within two days. Soon enough she was on her way out the door even though he had offered her to stay the night she had declined politely. It wasn't weird since they were close friends with one another anyway. Not to mention there were times where she would fall asleep while waiting for Jade to finish his analysis and he would be nice enough to place her in a room.

"Thank you Jade, I would have loved to spend more time with you, but I've been really busy as of late with all these murders." She thought for a moment and then looked up at him. He was a bit tall, scratch that he was tall, of course so she got on the tips of her toes and placed a kiss on his cheek to show him her gratitude.

Jade's face lit a flame, cheeks flushed as he touched where her lips made contact.

"I'll see you later." Was all she said before walking away briskly passed the gates of his house not looking back.

She would've heard the glass breaking inside the male's house in which indicated another presense inside.

. . .

Two days had passed and the dectective was trying to piece together what was the link between these series of murders.

She had to go check with Lilia who is the pathologist that had completed an autopsy on all the bodies of the victims. As eccentric as he was he was more tolerable than the combo of intricacies that are her co workers. Then again everyone in this office was weird in their own way.

"Ah, dectective what great weather we're having today, is it not?" He said with a smile on his face.

Unlike Jade he was significantly shorter than him so she had to look down a little to see him or stand a few feet away.

"It is indeed, Lilia. You seem to be in a good mood today."

"That is because I have made a breakthrough on today, while working through the night." His smile grew and the magenta eyes affirmed his happiness toward the news he had to share.

"On Mr. Trappola's body, I have found something strange but interesting nevertheless! A scale and not only that, but there is something you should see for yourself!" He brought her over to said man's corpse luckily the bottom half of his body is covered and the top half as well up to his shoulders.

Lilia grabbed one of his tools for dissection and beckoned her to come closer as she showed her what he had found. That's when she saw it.

Lilia had a small knife and maneuvered it to a small spot itself, lifting up a small piece of skin that was already slit and based on the size of the knife and similarity to another a butter knife it wouldn't have been able to cut the skin.

"There are two more like this on this side of his neck and three on the other side. So it seems like they're gills.

"What about the other bodies?"

"I spent the night examining those as well and they all have the same gills but Trappola here is the only one who had a few scales."

"So maybe the substance has something to do with these oddities on him. Trappola probably ingested some."

"It's quite possible that whoever this murderer is trying to test the substance on the person instead of themselves but based on Trappola's few scales being the latest attempt it seems they are making improvement for whatever the elixir's use is. These strange characteristics it reminds me of some fairytale I heard some time ago." He drifted off sounding like an old man reminiscing.

"Enlgihten me then Lilia." Knowing just how Lilia liked to ramble on about myths and legends like he'd seen them and lived through their stories.

"Well if you insist but this one involves merfolk certainly you've heard of mermaids and such right these scales on legs don't they remind you of those types of things. Gills on their necks so that half people half fish would gain the ability to breath underwater."

"Ah right but this is reality. Seeing is believing though right? Who knows though maybe they could help with the case." She was skeptic hearing about a bunch of lore that could just be coincidental but she knew better than that. Coincidents were more than just preordained.

. . .

Now back at Jade's manor the dectective was contemplating what in the world such a myth could play a factor in a murder scene. It just didn't make any sense as to why the person would need such a potion. What type of person would you have to be to go that f-

She couldn't finish that thought since Jade had opened the door.

"Ah, Jade good day to you-" the dectective looked up toward him to see the tall man staring at her for a bit longer than a few seconds. She did notice the strand of black hair usually on his right was on the left.

Unconsciously she reached up and was about to grab it before her hand was grabbed.

"Just what are you doing little dectective?" His voice got a bit darker towards the end sending shivers down her spine for a second before she saw his eyes in front of her and thought to herself for a second.

'Was his gold eye always on the right?'

A slight tighter squeeze on her hand woke her up form her head. She was reminded of the situation again. She could feel his breath closer to her face, she was internally malfunctioning and was losing her train of focus.

"Ah, I was, I was just trying to flip your black strand of hair." She stuttered and didn't internally curse herself this time since the proximity was still a factor in her brain turning to mush.

Jade suddenly smiled a wide one at that. Usually it'd be small and polite even when teasing he'd have a signature closed eyed smile keeping the adorable image of his flustered dectective in his head. But that wasn't the case this time. This smile was more menacing and sent bad news toward all who saw it.

Jade towered over her a bit more leaning to the right a bit toward her ear.

"Dectective do you know what you remind me of?" He questioned with a wide smile on his face.

He leaned in too close for comfort his breath could be felt on her right ear, while his hand on her shoulder kept her still.

"An adorable little shrimp! I could just eat you up!" He said it slow to build up suspense but it sounded serious and at the same time.

She pushed him away feeling her face heat up tremendously like an oven.

"J -Jade!" She couldn't find the words to describe what she just heard feeling beyond embarrassed and having her heart pound loudly that she swore he could hear.

"I -I have to go, thank you for your time!" She frantically stated about to run off but before she could Jade had grabbed her wrist and pulled her back.

"Aww can't I get a kiss too, little shrimp? Besides aren't you forgetting something?" She was too put off by the request to understand the sentence, but her mind did process part of the sentence and she remembered why she came here.

He held up a folded up sheet of paper in his hands toying with her holding it out of her reach.

How could he say that in such a cool voice? Her nerves couldn't handle so much teasing, it wasn't unlike him but it seemed he had gone over his usual gentlemanly behavior.

She hurriedly kissed him on the cheek in which he hadn't expected such a quick response to his question with a blush on his face becoming apparent and his frozen stature. She took the opportunity to jump up for the paper and ran from near the doorstep bidding farewell with the sheet of paper she had took in hand leaving a blushing male to watch her run out. His smile grew as he saw her frantic behavior, excitement bubbling within him.

He ran outside to the backyard of the mansion to go share his newfound happiness.

. . .

"Jade! Shrimpy is really cute!" The one male spoke to Jade in a tone of voice that was different than that of a few minutes, one that would have made him believe he was Jade himself.

There appearances were so similar, cept for the eyes and voice they were twins after all. With a little makeup and easy voice tone change one could hardly tell the difference anyway.

"I'd thought you'd understand if you saw her up close, Floyd." Jade was actually outside tending to his mushrooms in the garden while his look alike was entertaining the female detective that had left in a hurry. Though knowing his brother he could already assume how it must have went. Thinking of his little dectective being so flustered indefinitely brought out his sadistic side a bit.

"Can we keep her?" Floyd was so fond of her seeing her turn red, hearing her heart beating loudly, when she stuttered and that kiss on the cheek pretty much sealed the deal for him. She was so full of life and it brought excitement for him since he had to stay within the manor and avoid everyone. His behavior would be brash and scare many in the public eye not only that but his strength was inhuman which could cause problems for the person on the receiving end. Especially if you were trying to blend in.

They only came from the sea to see the lives of humans and unlike one of their friends who started a business in this day and age. Jade could survive on land with the ability to easily fool others with a facade whereas Floyd couldn't do that all the time and would probably squeeze someone for no reason other than boredom.

He didn't like being confined but after seeing the dectective sleeping on the couch once, he became curious as to who she was and why Jade spent so much time helping her. He knew for a fact his brother was not at all kind or generous. He was beginning to finally understand.

"We are but you have to be patient, you did give her both sheets of paper before she ran off correct?" His brother inquired finally seeing the hunger in his brother's eyes.

"Yup, she gave me a kiss just so she could distract me and take it. Shrimpy is so cunning she makes me want to squeeze her and pay her back for catching me off guard like that." The thought alone sounded enticing to Floyd, he couldn't wait to wrap his tail around her.

"I need you to go on another 'outing' tonight we have to perfect this first if we want to have any shot at having her to ourselves." Jade's words did nothing to damper his mood as his excitement reached a new level at the thought of showing his little Shrimpy off to everyone.

They were trying to get make a potion in which a human could become a sea creature, though it was easy for Jade to make one for himself and Floyd to come on land. The same can't be said for a person that's been human and has not a single gene that ties them to the ocean. Altering genetics is difficult and delicate and one mistake and their dear little detective could end up just like those poor unfortunate souls that were test subjects. Jade would never risk bringing her with them under the sea if he wasn't sure she'd make it.

"Okay~ Jade!" He said eagerly!

Now that Floyd was on board as well he would be more motivated and inclined to help, making it more easier for Jade as he wouldn't bother and complain so much about being on land longer.

. . .

She barely slept a wink after what had occurred. Every time she thought about her encounter with Jade she'd blush and bury her face into a pillow with frustration.

She tried before to get some of her work done before that, but that didn't work out too well as her mind drifted back to the same situation.

How close he was, the warmth of his breath against her ear, it was enough to make her brain stop functioning as if he were there again.

He seemed far more clingy than usual and she didn't know how to describe it other than strange. The notes from the alchemist were neat and precise and confirmed what Lilia and her examined on the bodies earlier in the day. But that wasn't the only thing that fell from the folded piece of paper. It was another small piece with neat cursive that matched the analytics on the other page.

'Would you like to spend your day off with me?'

Yet another reason she wouldn't be getting much sleep tonight.

. . .

After getting off from work she mentioned to her coworkers how Jade had offered her to spend her day off with him. Well they asked what she was gonna do with her day off since it was a rarity. First Cater asked her if she said yes to him yet. She said no and he understood from the get go that she was way too flustered to even respond to him. So he offered to go respond to him on her phone.

Rook congratulated her and went on a rant about love even though she tried to get through his head it wasn't a date. He asked what she would wear and she had no actual clue, in which Rook took that as an invitation to lend his aid and expertise.

He brought her to one of his friend's businesses. Cater said this place was highly recommended and that anyone whose anyone came to the place for a makeover. Specifically called Vil's beauty salon and boutique. She didn't understand how a person could have both but he seemed to be managing it fine. The said shop owner gave her one look and shook his head at her appearance.

His words were, "What a poor excuse for a girl to go on date with such a potato face such as that, it's shameful for not only you but the guy as well."

He had her try on clothes and by the end of it all, she felt different. Her head hurt from all the pulling around of her hair. She had put on enough clothes that she believed she was playing dress up. The outfit settled upon was different from her usual style and she had on makeup for the first time in her life.

Rook and Cater applauded Vil's work new appearance. The dectective had to admit that when she looked in the mirror she understood why Vil had such a reputation that Cater reccomended him highly.

She had to buy all of it of course and thanked Vil immensely for his efforts. There was actually a discount considering Rook brought her and she looked so 'pathetic'. He had a victoriously smug smile on his face and complimented his own efforts before waving the trio off. She thanked her two coworkers and bid them farewell, looking forward to the her first day off in a millennia.

When she met Jade the next day at his door he was plenty surprised by her appearance. He blushed with his eyes widened in astonishment at the change. Not to mention on the side of the manor Floyd could see just how beautiful she had dressed. It was going to be a long day especially with the heels she was wearing and trying her hardest to walk in.

. . .

The two friends went to Clover's bakery where Jade offered to pay for any sweets she wanted but it seemed they were terribly busy today and the line was a bit long not mention the place was packed inside so there weren't any tables to sit in.

Trey said it was nice to see her out and about for once not on dectective business for once. He said hello to Jade as they were all friends though she only knew Trey from Jade who introduced me. On rare occasions she would go to his bakery for something sweet. He handed them two cupcakes for free but also asked for a favor for him.

"Can you give deliever Riddle this tart please? His mother isn't home and he rarely ever gets anything sweet. I usually have Ace do it but-" He looks away for a moment.

"It's fine, Jade do you-"

"It's no trouble at all, we'd be happy to." He says with an enchanting smile on his face.

Trey handed over the box containing the tart to them and they made their way over to the clinic where Riddle resided.

On the way Jade and her conversed. She asked him why he agreed so quickly and he responded with his own unique answer.

"I know it's in your nature to help others. Yet another fond trait of yours."

It's more embarrassing hearing it for the first time and out loud no less. She could feel her face heat up again.

"Then there's when you turn into a cherry, one of my favorite traits." He said in a teasing tone with a smile toward her making the dectective flush even more and look away biting into her cupcake. To ignore the laughter emitting from her friend alongside her. Now this is the Jade she knows.

. . .

To be completely honest both of them enjoyed their time today with one another. They had delivered Riddle's tart which was almost a complete disaster.

Considering she asked Jade to be lookout in case his mother came back. Long story short she did arrive earlier than expected. After she and Riddle heard her voice outside the walls right near the entrance gate, the dectective told Riddle to go before she found him with the tart. Riddle was far more worried about her but the dectective told him she'd be fine.

By fine she meant ducking in the rose bushes for cover, there weren't any thorns surprisingly all been cut off. She waited for Riddle's mother to enter the house and had to scale the wall that was located next to an alleyway. Climbing up was the easy part but getting down was the hard part. She was wearing heels and that drop looked like she would possibly break a bone if she landed the wrong way.

She came to a decision to take a leap of fate and let her heels drop to the ground. One thought passed about Vil being pissed about her ruining them. She shook her head though and pushed herself off.

Before she could land someone else caught her. Looking up at her savior she saw the two colored eyes of Jade. Who smiled happily at making it on time.

"Ah look at that, my assumption was right. I thought you'd take this route out their place. It would've been such a shame if you were to get injured."

"Thank you Jade, can you put me down now please?"

"I don't think so I'd rather hold you like this until we get to the resturant for everyone to see." He playfully said watching her face heat up.

"Wha-? N -no I can walk on my own!"

"But you might have hurt something besides someone who can't get their words out is akin to a child so they must be coddled correct?" His teasing was endless today.

. . .

After leaving the Monstro Lounge a business run by one of Jade's friends, Azul Ashengrotto, the sun had already long set.

"Let me accompany you to your apartment, Y/n it's supposedly dangerous to be out after dark correct? Or you can just spend the night again?" He offered.

"I have to decline besides I've already used enough of your generosity I don't want to take it for granted. It's been such a great day thanks to you Jade, wish we could do these more often cept for the fact I have work tomorrow." She said in a relaxed tone.

Despite all the teasing she really did enjoy herself with the man. Having her heart beating loudly all day and having her brain short circuit was all too amusing to the man beside her, but out of everyone else even his own brother she made him feel strangely different. He couldn't explain the feeling itself, but he knew for a fact he'd never do all of this for someone he would use.

"You wish to spend more time with me? I can grant that you know." Jade had said that so simply and out of the blue but in a calm tone as well.

"There's no way you can do something like that but I appreciate the thought. It's fine though you've done enough already. I'd rather not burden you with a simple wish." She said with content.

Before he could respond to that statement fast footsteps hurried over to them both and made the pair turn around.

"I saw the killer it was Mr.Leech! He ran away from the scene!" His hair was a light green, eyes full of life and the loud tone of his voice was distinct.

"Sebek what do you mean you saw Jade kill someone he was with me the entire time!We just left the Monstro Lounge Azul saw us leave!" The dectective was defensive pertaining to justice being served, not to mention her friend was being accused and she had been with him the entirely of the day.

"No it was him I saw him Felmier was killed by him!"

"Felmier was killed?! You should've started with that! Take me to the body did you make sure he was dead?!"

. . .

Sebek had spread all about the town that Jade was the murderer even though the people who had seen us together throughout the day vouched. Trey, Riddle, Azul, Rook, and Cater even Vil had seen them together. Some actually took Sebek's words in and started to distrust Jade even so.

Vil and Rook two friends of Felmier had paid for the funeral costs as Epel's family was struggling. It was admirable to see the young man take on the vicious job as Vil's protégé. It really was a shame. Vil actually kept up a face and Rook though he looked upon the casket with blank like expression it was easy to tell he was out for blood. Jade did show up to pay his respects even though some glared at him and were suspicious.

Vil came up to dectecrive during the repass and told her to make that fool pay dearly. She would of course no argument there. Epel had been a good kid and may have been a bit brash but still good nonetheless. So was Ace.

And thus a good day ended on a sour note.

The dectective would have more sleepless nights. Lilia performed an autopsy on Epel's body with Vil standing by his side to make sure he didn't damage it. Even he was shocked to see more and more scales near his legs and gills that were more prominent.

These people were getting even more closer to there goal it seemed and she couldn't do a thing. She was so frustrated at that fact alone. Jade's analysis did help some though. Looking through shops though that sold what would be the components of the elixir nothing suspicious could be found in any of the people who had brought those items. Not to mention those who did didn't have all the items brought from another store, there was no reoccurring name in sales.

Speaking of Jade though she had begun to think back to Sebek. He wasn't the type to lie not on the name of the mysterious nobleman Malleus Draconia that he served would he ever embarrass himself to stain his name even slightly. That's what Lilia told her at least.

He said Jade had did the deed. But he was with her the entire time. Come to think Sam's description had also matched Jade's strange behavior before he gave her the analysis, but it didn't make sense. Jade was one person he couldn't be in two places at once!

Maybe someone was trying to frame him and to that extent she went to go question if he had any enemies of the sort. His response was that he didn't have any as far as he knew. That could have been a good lead.

With no others she sighed looking extremely worn out and Jade had a frown seeing her state. He insisted she stay the night and she denied saying she had to finish this case even more so now. He at least offered her a meal in which he put slipped some sleeping pills that made her fall asleep after eating.

Both pairs of two colored eyes gazed at her peaceful state not liking how she'd exhaust herself with so much work. Only for the sake of others and waste time and effort for people that isn't them. It was annoying to Floyd and agitated Jade more than he liked to admit. She did say she wanted to spend more time with them right?? If only she didn't have that stupid job. Even more a reason to push the date up to the next few days.

. . .

About a week and a half had passed and the dectective had no other leads still. It was killing her to say the least. All those unfortunate victims and those families and friends that mourned definitely weighed on her shoulders, guilt eating at her insides. Such a shame too within the end of the day she was at home taking an evening nap on her day off in which she didn't even go out today. Her phone buzzed waking her up from her slumber.

A text from Jade. It had been awhile since they last talked seeing as she fell asleep at his manor again even though she didn't intend to.

Rubbing her eyes she read the text from her bright phone screen.

'Meet me at the dock at 10 today.'

She wasn't as flustered as last time in fact she considered not going as this case took top priority. But this was Jade, her closest friend, and she hadn't taken much of a break as her nap was only 30 mintues probably the only amount of sleep she would get today if she was being honest with herself.

She reluctantly sighed and decided to get ready an hour before meeting him and walk there a bit early to have some time to her own thoughts. She thought about going to Vil's shop to buy another outfit but it would have been a waste if they were only meeting for a short time. Not to mention she didn't want Vil to come to the conclusion she was slacking off with Jade even though the bags around her eyes were very much proof.

As she sat at the edge of the dock admiring the stars the waves hitting the edge of the pier calmed her head. It was nice to say the least.

She wondered what Jade would have to talk about. She looked at her phone and saw it was 10:05, Jade being late was a surprise, hopefully if she waited a bit longer her worry would ease. That atmosphere could not have lasted any longer.

A slight wind blew and during that exact moment something pulled her under by her feet into the cold ocean waters below. She managed to hold her breath and open her eyes to see nothing but darkness even with the moon behind the clouds right about now only endless shadows were there.

She could barely hear but she could have sworn something swam by her. Arms touched her waist which almost made her scream for a moment though that was something suicidal. It touch the sides of her stomach and stayed there for a moment.

Even though she tried to struggle it was fruitless when the thing that held her tickled her sides making her open her mouth and succumb to breathing in water then choking soon after. That wasn't the only thing to occur since the next second lips were on hers and a fluid trickled down her throat along with the water that she was trying to swallow. The tongue of said thing dipped inside her mouth and would have made her gag if they hadn't pulled away.

She regretted it the moment they did cause she still could breath and with her mouth open she thought she would take her final breath. Both or what she assumes were two people backed off letting her go to meet her demise with her slowly closing her eyes. She didn't notice the glow of what transpired around her lower half of her body. She could finally take in some much needed breaths except her neck for some reason felt sore and she could no longer move her legs separately to try and swim up for air.

Looking down she saw the horrid image of a long tail with a fin on the end where her legs were supposed to be. The pain form her neck was from three newly formed slits on either side of her neck. Her fingers traced over them finding this whole situation unbelievable. When she finally came to her senses she found herself hearing voices as well.

"Shrimpy's still here! It worked, Jade!" A cheerful voice could be heard in the cold waters that surrounded her.

Something slimy wrapped about her new found lower half. Pulling her closer to be within someone's arms. They held her a bit too tight like all the air, water in her lungs could have been? Did she still even have those anymore she wondered? Even still the amount of pressure put on her by the creature hugging her was able to be felt.

He was laughing happily spinning around in circles with the former human female getting dizzy by the second.

"I can see that Floyd. How wonderful, but do take it down a notch she only was just turned after all." That voice was all too familiar. She couldn't help but say it aloud, but that couldn't be true.

"Jade?" Her voice was a whisper but of course he still heard it.

"Yes, my dear angelfish what is it?" He responded in an endearing tone that was calm despite the situation she was just put through.

She glanced toward the voice to see what appeared to be a creature similar to that of an eel by the tail. Her eyes trailed up to the sight of his face. It was him no doubt about it. The eyes were exact and so was the hair the only difference was the body and skin.

"Aw Shrimpy why'd you acknowledge him first? I'm here too." A voice whined in a more child like tone directly in her ear. It brought a shiver down her spine.

'Shrimpy?' That was unmistakably the nickname Jade gave her when he acted weird.

She turned toward his way and saw a sharp toothed grin on his face when she looked at him.

"Floyd you haven't even introduced yourself." Jade sounded like his normal self and this Floyd person was just the complete opposite of him.

"Oh right Shrimpy I'm Floyd, Jade's brother and your going to be with us in the sea from now on! Isn't that great? I can't wait to show you all my favorite places you'll love it!" He sounded so excited while dread built up in the mermaid.

"What do you mean stay here?! What have you done to me? Who, what even are you two?!" She said those words with malice laced into them having them both chuckle in response.

Jade had also wrapped his tail about her upper half restraining her further. He brought himself closer to her face, a smirk etched on to it.

"My, my, Y/n you did say you wanted to spend more time with me, isn't this what you wanted?" He tilted her chin up showing a sadistic smile on his face that only built up even more dread than what his brother had already.

"I didn't realize or expected anything like this and you know that! Why would you do this?! You! You-" She thought for a second processing all that had occurred the past couple of weeks.

"You killed them you gave them that exlixir that ended their lives. Every single one of them." This time it was the other brother's turn to speak.

"There's our little dectective she's so smart!~" Floyd just made her completely uncomfortable with how he would call her that nickname and whisper words in her ear.

"Why? Why would you do this?" She became defeated knowing turf like this was theirs and she stood no chance against them in the first place.

"Eh why? Is Shrimpy really that blind Jade?" Floyd mocked her with no remorse as tears streamed down the dectective's eyes at the thought of letting so many people down.

"Why? My dear angelfish haven't you noticed? We've become quite enamored with you. Hm no better word to put it is obsessed, at first it was just me but with Floyd's impatience I just had to get him in on understanding why we didn't go back home already. As for those people they were necessary for testing the elixir for this very moment. We couldn't have you dying on us afterall." He said with absolute calmness evoking rage within the mermaid.

She clenched her fists.

"So many were sacrificed, I should've died, instead." She murmured the last half but both the twin eels heard it.

There expressions turned dark and their tails gripped the female tighter startling her from her state of guilt.

"Eh, why would you say that Shrimpy, we can't have you leaving us. We finally got you all to ourselves and I haven't had much time with you, and yet you say you want to leave." Floyd's arms contracted her more than Jade's tail already, now she understood what it must have felt like for Trappola.

"He is right Y/n dear, we only want what's best for you and having you say that only makes our blood boil so please understand." Jade gripped her chin with a scary amount of strength. This was the first time he ever seemed so much more intimidating to her.

"Don't ever say something like that again am I clear?"

From that point on she was stuck between the twin eels who loved her so. She only wished she could have been able to listen to Sebek when he said the truth. Mr. Leech did do it just not the one she thought.

[steamberrystudio]

I really love your art style! It has such character and is instantly recognizable and is so uniquely yours. It's probably one of my top 3 art styles in any VN. When did you start drawing? Do you have any tips for someone just starting out?

Awwww! Thank you so much. That really brought a smile to my face. o///w///o

I think I'm just one of those people that never stopped drawing. All kids draw, but many people stop drawing for years and years and pick it up later. I have always drawn quite a lot. Some of my funniest/earliest stories about drawing come from Kindergarten. Like the time I got in trouble for colouring the snow in a winter picture blue. ("Oh, sweetie. Snow isn't *blue* - do you want to re-do this?" ....YOU KNOW WHAT? No. Snow reflects whatever colour light is around so it absolutely can be blue. How dare you, Ms Teacher! >=o )

Or the time the principle had me draw a duck for her because I went through a Duck Phase where I drew a ton of ducks and apparently drew them very well. I'm not sure who told the principle about my ducks or why. But I remember she was observing the class one day and specifically called me over to draw a duck for her.

I never specifically took art classes through school (something I regret) because I had other interests at the time as well. But eventually it all narrowed down to writing and art.

I think advice I'd give to someone who is just picking up drawing again would be:

1. Do not compare yourself to others who have more experience. It's great to have artists you look up to, but comparing yourself to them too much can really destroy your motivation and confidence. Remember that even artists you look up to...have artists THEY look up to. We all compare ourselves to others and think "MAN...I wish I could draw like them." But don't let that kind of thing hold you back.

2. There are tons of tutorials, workshops, and articles available online now. So don't hesitate to look those up and learn from them.

3. Don't expect too much progress too fast. Drawing isn't magical or mystical and it doesn't require innate talent. But it is a lot of hardwork to improve. That means if you're just starting out, you may find that progress is slow. You may feel dissatisfied with your initial attempts. That's all pretty natural, to be honest. You need to give yourself the time to improve without making yourself feel like you're not good enough in a fast enough period of time. It really isn't a race.

4. Good tools and supplies can certainly open up more avenues for improvement but having the best tools available will not automatically make you a great artist. There's a reason tradiational art supplies come in grades of quality (scholastic, student, professional). Don't feel like you have to invest in all the highest tier stuff right away. Whether you start out traditional and digital, your supplies and equipment will grow with you. That's normal.

And I think that's all. I know it's pretty general advice but I hope it helps you some! Good luck with your art endeavours!

~Esh

[kxowledge]

Thank you SO MUCH - I found about Anki through your blog. I'm still getting familiar with the system, but so far it's been amazing. I use it for languages but plan to use it for complex topics, too. Do you have any Anki tips? Any other learning software you hold in high esteem? Best of luck, dear - I wish you success in all your endeavours!

!!!!

Can’t believe I’m so excited about a flashcard app, yet I am. I’m glad you are enjoying it & I’m always happy to hear anything related to knowledge or languages.

I only use it for languages/vocab. I do believe it lends itself to various uses for a great variety of disciplines, but it doesn’t suit what I’m currently studying and how I prefer to study it. I also don’t use any other software for learning (besides the obvious Office suite and Zotero for citations), so I can’t be of much help there – though I must say that for languages, I actually prefer Lingvist (if you want to check another flashcard system) over Anki, because the former is a pre-made set of most frequent words that you learn in the context of a sentence and that you have to type, but because of its price point (which I recently discovered to be rather prohibitive, whereas I’m still billed a promotional price of 25€/year) and its limited range of languages, Anki is still the superior choice.

However, I do have some tips (aka things that it took me a bit to figure out) for Anki:

You can copy-paste screenshots when making your cards – this has been extremely useful for me when it came to Hebrew, as I’m working through vocab lists that my professor assigned, but from which I can’t copy the words themselves.

Check out the shared decks, because there are some gems – I recently started Biblical Greek to keep up with the language after taking the final exam, but there are many interesting topics out there

Some people advocate for only clicking ‘Good’, but I would instead recommend finding what works for you. Personally, at first I mostly only click on ‘Hard’ because I want the word to keep appearing and only use ‘Good’ once I am very confident about it (which is different from getting the meaning right in that moment), but I also use ‘Easy’ when I know the word so well I don’t want to see it ever again (or at least for one or more months).

I don’t want my cards to be marked as ‘leech’ and be suspended. Even though I understand the reasoning behind the function, I’m studying words that I will need, I can’t afford to skip one. Thankfully, I found out that it’s very easy to alter the settings: if you click on the small wheel and go under options > lapses, you can change the leech threshold to a number so high that you won’t ever reach it.

 Consistency is key! I know this goes without saying, but I truly believe that practicing cards everyday does make a significant difference compared to practicing them once in a while. Keep at it for a couple of months and you’ll see big results.

 Nothing special, but I hope some of these might be useful for you - good luck with your learning journey!

[missbugaboo]

LadyNoir July 2020 | Day 1

"Chat let his fingers hover over her fist, coming close enough to nearly brush the back of her hand with the tips of his claws, but not close enough for her to feel it distinctively. Ladybug wanted to scream."

Written for @ladynoirjuly2020

And a big shout-out to @nerdypanda3126​ for proofreading it for me again!

Day 1: A Wall Between Us

C’est fort quand je le vois Je veux crier sur tous les toits Notre amour qui nous tend les bras Mais je sais que je ne dois pas Ce n’est pas le moment Il faut être patients Être patients

It is strong when I see it I want to shout it out on all the rooftops Our love that reaches us But I know I shouldn’t It is not the moment We need to be patient Be patient

"It doesn't matter, does it?" he asked the night before him, his words echoing in the cool Parisian air with a note of resignation that surpassed even the sadness in them. He was calm, he was composed, he was anything she could wish him to be, handling the situation with all the dignity of a true young gentleman.

A true hero.

And yet, as Ladybug watched his back, stiff and tense under his ebony suit, she couldn't help but regret every wish she had ever made regarding his conduct.

It would have been so much better if he had just screamed with annoyance at her.

"It doesn't matter if I say it or not," she heard him pick up after the shortest of pauses and refocused her wandering gaze at the back of his head; she wished she could look into his face instead, but clearly, that wasn't an option now... and who knew if maybe it wasn't for the best, for both of their sakes. "It doesn't matter if I hold back and pretend that I've moved on or if I throw caution to the wind and go back to telling you how much I actually care. Meaning, there really is no point acting as if I don't."

"Chat, please-" she tried to respond, but he gave her no chance.

"You know that I love you, Ladybug," he said, his voice as firm as it was cold. "You do, so don't hurt me even more pretending that you don't. It's bad enough as it is, without you treating me like a fool."

She nodded, biting her lower lip as she fought desperately in the battle against her own misery. There was a stinging behind her eyes and a wetness under her lashes; a lump rising in her throat and a headache she could feel coming.

Her nails dug against the palms of her hands, so deep that even the magical fabric of her costume wasn't enough to nullify the pain.

She saw Chat turn around slowly and suddenly, she realised that it was far more difficult not to look away on her part. She had prayed for him to face her, she reminded herself, forcing her rebellious body to remain still and meeting her partner's gaze steadily. She would not succumb to her own weakness and run, no matter how much she wanted to.

After all, she owed him that much.

"I do know," she whispered at last, hoping that her resolution would be enough to keep her from falling apart, if only for a little while. "But I never intended to hide it from you. I just... didn't think it would do any good bringing it up again. Perhaps I was the one being foolish this time."

He was closer now, so close that she could see that sad smile of his without even looking directly at it. It made her heart clench with pain; all the more so when she once again recalled that there really was nothing she could do about it.

They were in a pit, and there simply wasn't a way out at this point.

"Because you can't love me back, right?" Chat mused quietly. "But Ladybug, I know that. You've been as clear as you could be and even if that weren't the case, the last two years would have been enough to teach me that sometimes you just can't change how things are. That... stubbornness... regardless of how noble the intentions might be, may often lead to suffering, for both of the parties involved.

"However, the same experience that made that clear to me also taught me something else. Namely, that no matter how much I try, what means I take, I just can't get over my feelings for you; and my hopeless endeavours to do so were exactly what hurt people most."

She felt it rather than saw his next movement, when he raised his hand and reached towards hers. Her instincts told her to step away, or at least to clasp her hands together in a way that would make it impossible for him to grasp her - and yet, that first first impulse was soon overcome by the next, one that made her freeze in space, unable to as much as lift her finger, and much less to make a motion that was not only conscious, but effective as well.

And then it turned out that all of it was of no importance, as Chat himself was the one restraining himself in the end.

She almost wished that he had gone through with it.

Yet, he didn't. Instead, he let his fingers hover over her fist, coming close enough to nearly brush the back of her hand with the tips of his claws, but not close enough for her to feel it distinctively.

Ladybug wanted to scream.

"I'm not asking you to change your mind, you know," he continued in a hoarse whisper that matched her trembling murmurs from before. "Mostly because I know it's not your mind that needs changing. I've learnt first-hand that you can't make your heart feel differently than it does, whether you want to fall in love or to fall out of it... So, I would be an idiot trying to impose something like that on you."

"I've never felt that you did," Ladybug answered quickly, before he could start another monologue. She saw him raise an eyebrow at her and blushed, abashed. "I mean, I did in the early stages, I guess. In those first months of this whole superhero thing... At the time before you found a girlfriend two years ago. But never after that."

"Even though you knew how I felt?"

She shrugged and crossed her arms, embracing her own body tightly. "Maybe? It's not like I knew all along, after all. I really did believe that you'd moved on at first... I mean, you seemed to glow whenever you mentioned that girl of yours, so it couldn't have all been fake. And even when I realised that you still thought about me that way, it was different. You were different."

"I thought I was," Chat agreed with a smile. This time, Ladybug did sense his touch against her hand, before he stepped back and turned away from her. His hand rose to scratch the nape of his neck; once again, she had to restrain from reaching out and grasping it herself. "Though it's certainly good to know that it was more than my wishful thinking. The last thing I wanted was to make you uncomfortable, even if I knew the odds of that happening were slim. So, I'm relieved."

"I'm glad that you are," she offered with a weak smile of her own.

"And I swear that hasn't changed," he went on, as if he hadn't heard her say it; then again, it really could have been the case. "I'm not trying to convince you to reconsider your stance, or to give me a chance. I know that I don't have any. The boy you've always talked about... I don't know if you've reached an understanding with him - quite frankly, I don't think I want to know - but it's obvious that he still means the world to you. That in the same way that I was unable to get over you, you can't really give up on him. And it's fine, it really is... Because I have no intention of standing in the way of that. All I want is for you to let me admit my own feelings and to acknowledge them. I won't ask for anything more than that."

He spun on his heel one more time, ready to face her. His initial animosity was long gone at this point, his trademark grin back in his place with no sarcastic vibe attached to it. There was a melancholy in it. Anguish, perhaps.

Nothing but that.

Ladybug watched him for a while, processing his speech, analysing word upon word of what he had said. She could almost feel herself drowning in all the warmth that had radiated from his assertions, the selflessness and attentiveness with which he had treated her for the longest time, unable and unwilling to break the comforting silence with her own untimely response.

And yet, she was bound to respond.

"You're wrong about one thing," she chose to say eventually. "The boy you mentioned... He's not the reason why I'm keeping my distance with you."

The shock on his face was as great as it was expected, and it almost made Ladybug chuckle - or it surely would have, had the matter not been as serious as it was. Still, it made some of the tension between them dissolve; Ladybug quickly decided that it was an opportunity she should not allow to pass.

In for an inch, in for a mile.

"I don't want to play with your feelings, Chat, which is why I didn't say anything before. Maybe I shouldn't say anything now, either... But you were honest with me, and I feel it's only right if I repay you in kind," she explained carefully. "I don't want to go into details, not yet... However, I believe you have the right to know the reason I'm  still keeping you at arm's length at times - or at least to know what isn't that reason."

"So, what you're saying is... You're no longer in love with him?"

Again, Ladybug nodded.

"But... You still won't fall in love with me?"

His question resonated in her ears for a good few moments, silence falling over them once more as she let herself ponder over his words, trying to find a way to answer him in a way that would be both safe and sincere. There was still so much at risk, way too much for her to easily disregard the first of the requirements, yet at the same time, she couldn't lie to him about a matter so major.

Sadly, she couldn't exactly tell him that she had fallen in love with him already, either.

Which was precisely what had happened. She couldn't tell how or when, though certainly not for the luck of trying to determine it ("I've fallen for Chat Noir, Tikki! When did I do that?!"), and no one, no one had been more surprised than the young superheroine herself (again, not that she was in the position to tell anyone about this insanity). She didn't know if there was a specific moment or event that made her heart speed up for him, or even if there was one that only made her realise her advancing infatuation when she'd been in too deep to even think of going back.

It was unclear, unsettling, confusing... while simultaneously, the more time had passed since she had first accepted a possibility of thinking of her friend in terms of romance, the more obviously natural it appeared.

Because she did love Chat Noir.

Of course she did.

Still, it had taken her aback at first. When Adrien and Kagami broke up (a good five months after she had parted ways with Luka), she was sure that her treacherous heart would take over her brain again, making her go back to square one despite the progress she had made beforehand. Sure, she probably wouldn't fall apart every time Adrien might decide to talk to her when she'd been perfectly able to speak with full sentences (or paragraphs, when her creativeness struck her) for the majority of the previous year. However, that could hardly be a guarantee of her overall success.

Surprisingly, though, the catastrophe she had feared so much didn't come. Weeks and months had passed and the two became closer than ever before - and yet, their relationship never reached the point of being a romantic one. There were a few... instances when it seemed it might go that way - a farewell embrace that lasted a little longer than necessary, a cheek kiss that held more to it than a traditional greeting required.

A few of the many night-time calls that hinted at the prospect of not remaining entirely platonic after all.

All those were one time incidents, too few and too trivial to be given any consideration afterwards. Nothing but hints which, not taken up by the other person, were left alone and forgotten about.

The funniest thing?

It was Adrien who dropped those hints most of the time.

But he wasn't petty or disappointed about it. They were friends - best friends - who also happened to be testing waters a little, after both of their relationships had gone south. She stopped doing it as soon as she realised to whom her heart really belonged now; Adrien went on with it still, though frankly speaking, it seemed more of a habit he'd developed than a serious offer on his part.

So there she was, head over heels in love with her other best partner and friend, who apparently never managed to get over her. A perfect situation with a perfect ending in sight.

If only it was some other time.

"I'm sorry, what?" Chat asked suddenly, making her snap out of her reverie.

The disoriented look he was giving her made her realise that she had said the last part out loud and, not wanting to confuse him more, she rephrased, "The time. It's not the right time."

She had no trouble noticing the change in him, prompted by her words. His eyes widened behind the mask; his breathing hitched for a second while his mouth opened a bit, the hope and anxiety visible in every inch of his being.

Oh, how she wanted to tell him more! To run up to him and throw her arms around his neck, heedless to the risk that was bound to such an act. To forget about Hawkmoth and their duty to defeat him, of Chat Blanc and the tragedy meant to occur if they gave in to their own dreams and needs.

To tell him that she loved him and that she was sure she always would.

But she couldn't tell him that. Even if she made the condition of not becoming official and waiting until Hawkmoth is no more, it would have been to risky. Official or not, a couple or not, they would not be the same after the confession was made - and as much as she yearned to say the words, it was not something they could afford right now.

The moment just wasn't right.

So she stared back at him, their eyes locked together as she tried to convey her affection without making a statement itself. Then she took a deep breath and, making sure he was listening carefully, she asked:

"Will you wait for me, Chaton?"

The gleam of happiness she saw in his irises was all she could ever ask for.

[intxthing]

So, I'm pretty sure I'm an INTJ/social 5, and I was just wondering if anyone else did this: I find that I am very curious about social gossip. I'm super embarrassed by that fact, but I have realized I'm actually a HUGE snoop, and what to know everything about everyone's lives at all times. But I'm also hypocritical and never want to share anything about myself, bc I'm private. This may not make sense/be relatable, but it helped typing it out, and I just wondered others have had this experience.

Hi Anon! I personally don't relate to the thirst for gossip quite as much as you, but I can relate to a need for consistent interaction and interpersonal engagement. It's been a while, but every time I take the MBTI I get very high introvert scores--usually 10% Extravert 90% Introvert or more. And there are a lot of jokes about INxx types (particularly INTx types) having no social life. Still, I find myself drawn to highly social, conversational situations: parties, book clubs, debate (organised or casual among friends), anything where I can converse with people. I think it may stem from a thirst for knowledge? I like reading old books about graphology and getting sucked into Wikipedia vortexes about conspiracy theories, but I'm also fascinated about people--how we think, feel, and engage with each other. The best way to collect data is to interact with primary sources: other people. I don't think this approach to interaction is cold or malicious; in fact, I think it helps me empathise with others and maybe even understand my own emotions and processes a little better. Hopefully this (somewhat) addressed your comment? Sorry if I got too self centred? Thanks so much for sending an ask! 

-- intx :)

P.S. Wishing everyone good luck on their back-to-school, back-to-work, or starting-something-entirely-new-and-different endeavours ✨

[i-draws-dinosaurs]

Hi! Do you have any tips on getting into digital art? I'm getting an art tablet soon, but I don't know where to begin. I want to draw animals if that helps

Congrats in advance on getting a tablet! I’m still pretty new to the whole digital art thing myself (I only got my first tablet like one-and-a-half years ago), but I’d be happy to give some tips on getting started!

1. Don’t try to create a masterpiece the first time you use the tablet. This might sound a bit obvious but the first thing you should do with a tablet is a lot of sketching and messing around to be able to get the feel of using a tablet, which can be a pretty unfamiliar sensation. If you expect yourself to be able to create a beautiful digital painting the first time you use a tablet, you’ll probably be disappointed. Just playing around with little sketches is a much better way to get accustomed to digital drawing.

This is the first thing I ever drew with a graphics tablet. Just a sketch of an Allosaurus head with which I then proceeded to attempt an obscene amount of detail and gave up after I barely started. It’s okay to start small!

2. Play around with the brush settings in your art program. Most art programs have a wide variety of brush settings that you can fiddle around with to adjust size and transparency based on pen pressure, as well as different styles of brush that give different effects. I’d recommend messing around with these a bit while you’re doing your practise sketching to find a brush type that is most comfortable for your style of drawing.

You can get a ridiculous amount of variation in brushes by fiddling around in the settings. I use Photoshop, but other drawing programs probably have similar tools. There are plenty of tutorials online on how to create your own personal brushes on different art programs, which can be a fantastic way to personalise your art and make it a bit more special.

3. Practice shading and highlights. One of my absolute favourite things about digital art is that it gives you the ability to easily create strong, bright highlights over your drawings, which is something that you just can’t do easily with a lot of traditional media such as coloured pencils. If you put in the time, effort, and practice to get this right, you can create really solid, three-dimensional-looking art. I can’t offer a lot of great advice on this since it’s still something that I’m working on myself, but there are plenty of tutorials on the internet on shading and highlighting in digital art that are really worth checking out and studying.

This Teratophoneus is probably one of my proudest achievements in shading and highlighting so far. The ability to draw light colours on top of pretty much anything is incredibly useful for creating good, solid highlights

4. Don’t feel pressured to be amazing at digital art immediately. There is definitely a learning curve to becoming good with a graphics tablet, and you almost certainly won’t be able to create beautifully-lit, photorealistic art right away. I’m still very early on in my digital art exploration, so I know that it can often be disheartening to see accomplished digital artists creating amazing pieces of art while you’re still trying to figure out how to use the lasso tool. The important thing to remember is that these artists probably have years more experience than you. That being said, if you put effort and care into practising digital art, you will improve at it, just like any other art form. Your first attempts will probably not be all that impressive, but your first attempts do not reflect what you will develop into as a digital artist.

Two dinosaur heads, drawn by me, roughly 1.5 years apart. I only just found this really old drawing today, and I am honestly shocked by how far I’ve come. Art improvement might be hard to notice as it happens, but it’s so rewarding to look back and see where you came from.

And finally, the two most important ones (in my opinion):

5. Experiment with whatever you feel like. Digital art is an amazingly versatile medium. You can essentially make your artworks look like anything you want to. That can sound quite daunting, but it’s a great opportunity to spread yourself out and challenge yourself artistically. Want to draw something simple and cartoony? You can do that. Want to draw something so detailed it looks like a photo? You can do that too! Want to just go completely nuts with colours and see where it takes you? Guess what, you can also do that!

Don’t be afraid to try doing something new with digital art. I have at least three very different digital art styles that I can use interchangeably whenever I want it, and I feel like that’s the real power of digital art. The ability to create whatever you want to do, whenever you want to do it, however you want to do it. The ability to diversify and branch out and explore completely new styles and methods without having to worry about resources or media or buying lots of expensive pencils or paints that you might never use again. Whenever the mood strikes you, just sit down and start creating anything you want.

ABOVE: The many digital art styles of Tas. From abstract graphic design to realistic, anatomical illustrations, digital art is an incredibly broad medium.

6. Keep practising traditional art. This is something that I think is essential as an artist. Digital art should not take over any traditional art methods that you already use. Instead, it should be treated as something to expand your range, not replace it. I’ve raved about digital art quite a bit in this post, but to me there’s still nothing that feels better than a graphite pencil on a sheet of paper.

I drew a series of Triassic reptiles in graphite last year, and they remain some of my favourite restorations of prehistoric animals that I’ve ever done. Don’t underestimate the humble HB pencil.

The great thing about doing digital and traditional art is that one method informs the other. You might figure out some cool new technique with watercolours, graphite, coloured pencils, or whatever you prefer to use, and then use that same technique in your digital art. Likewise, digital art can also influence how you approach your traditional works. I have personally learned a lot more about shading since I started creating digital artworks, and I’ve been able to apply that knowledge to my traditional pieces as well.

This Bi-stahieversor is my most recent traditional artwork, and almost all of the shading and texturing techniques are based on things that I’ve learned from doing digital art. I highly doubt I would have been able to learn these as well if I hadn’t done a lot of shading practice in digital art.

Well, this has turned out to be significantly longer than I thought it would be. If anyone else has any other advice, please feel free to add it! I’m sure there are plenty of more experienced artists out there who have much more to teach than I could at this point in time.

Good luck with your new tablet, Anon, and best wishes in your artistic endeavours!

[etudaire]

HI! I absolutely love your post about studyjo. I'm inspired to start my own too! If it isn't too much to ask, do you mind sharing how you organise your study tracker and the productivity tracker? Thank you so much for your helpful posts. I wish you all the best in your endeavours.

You are such an amazing person! This potato loves you lol!As for my study tracker I don't really make columns or anything, I just note the time I start studying, subject I study, topic I cover, time I stop studying and rate the session out of 5 stars.The productivity tracker is sort of a pixelised table if that makes sense? Like, you must have seen it somewhere if you're following bujo stuff, it's like these tiny boxes that you fill in with colours and then colour code it?I kinda go for 2 colours only ( cuz I'm a lazy ass) blue for a productive day and red for a non productive day.I suggest adding another colour green or smthn where you mark days you got hit done but didn't feel productive? If that makes sense?There can be several other Productivity trackers too such as making tally marks for each day you "studied" (not hw, assignments) for at least 25 minutes.You can make a graph and mark points for each day you think you did well and connect the dots at the end of the week/month.I'm experimenting with such options, so maybe I'll come up with something even better? Maybe I mean I'm a potato lol 😂Thanks again for asking and for your kind words. Good luck with your studyjo! Love, megha ♥

[morbidology]

(Bakery anon again. I won't message again but thank you so much!) I would call but it's been 3 years now. I don't want to bring things up again. I don't put it on my job applications anyway but if it does ever get found I'm just worried what my future employers would think is all. Thanks for answering the messages and being so nice about it. I hope you have a good rest of your day!

You're very welcome. I wouldn't worry about it whatsoever and I wish you the very best luck in your future endeavours. Have a wonderful day too!