#I'm trying to at least watch more movies and current media so I'm in the know Ig

[burned-lariat]

I love my trend of watching two movies on select home flights. The last time I did it, I watched Lady Bird and Love, Simon. I enjoyed both.

This time, I watched The Whale and Bodies Bodies Bodies and...hmm.

The Whale

I'll get this out of the way: Brendan Fraser EARNED that damn award. EARNED IT. His performance was fantastic. Close second to Hong Chau (Liz the nurse). Otherwise, there wasn't much to engage with. The plot was fairly non-existent (I think we were watching this man just kill himself, and thus, it was the "plot"). I was constantly gaslit to think Ellie was worth investment, especially by Charlie, though it's debatable on whether or not he's meant to be listened to (considering how he was never shown to be a liar, seems like his take was meant to be correct). You could've done without Thomas - he was unneeded. I get it's based on a play, but you mean to tell me that the script writer and Aronofsky couldn't toy with certain elements more?

I also think the movie was too short to do what the staff wanted it to do. I saw I was about 80 minutes in, and almost nothing had happened. Nothing progressed the "plot" beyond Charlie's eating disorder as he marched further and further, and this "reconnection" with Ellie was on an infinite loop that was very unearned at the end of the film. I think there could've been something there with having characters like Ellie and Thomas craft deeper empathy upon seeing Charlie's plight, where Ellie understands that her father's decisions are not on a black-and-white binary and Thomas steps out of the fanaticism circle (plus it gives the character more relevance). Liz worked just fine in her role, and she was a high point story-wise. Same with the ex-wife, though her only being in one sequence and having their past all dumped in a lone monologue really is a bummer. Fraser and Chau were great, but the rest couldn't get there.

6/10.

Bodies Bodies Bodies

About 20 mins in, when someone described the BBB game, I realized I'm just basically watching an IRL game of Among Us go wrong and had to hunker down. I actually did find myself quite bored down the stretch, mostly between deaths, because there was just a bunch of walking around and dead air during the hurricane. Each of the characters had the depth of a puddle, even for the characters that were meant to have more than that (like Bee and Sophie). The acting was hit or miss - I think Stenberg was the best of the bunch, Davidson was fine for his limited time, Sennott swung between great and flat, and everyone else was just kind of dull. I didn't care about them. There was nothing to engage with. I don't need to like you, I need to engage with you, and if I can't get that, then it's a wash because I stop caring.

I also think this film suffered from being too short, and I'd actually argue that Bee isn't needed. You could still have the plot work without the end twist (it was dumb!!) and having Sophie as the sole lead, where her return after rehab and the subsequent playing of the game outs all the drama. Speaking of drama, much of these characters' histories were told to me. I want to see it, not be told it. Why not have people mention a memory or flinch on a trigger over behavior instead of dialogue dumps of content (which I'll get to) and constantly saying "oh we're longtime besties!!" every other sentence?

Speaking of, good God did this movie just spill the details of the group's qualms practically unprovoked. We didn't get to see it in nuanced performances or context clues via presence and scenery and dialogue: we got EXPOSITION DUMPS. Jordan's beef about Sophie? Teased for a scene or two in the very beginning, left out to dry for a while, and then dumped en masse when she squared off with Bee and Sophie. Max and David beefing over Emma? Two mini conversations about it with no clues teasing such (like if the idea is that they wanna dangle Max as the red herring, they could leave inside jokes or teases that point in his direction like making David's injuries around the black eye). Max doesn't show up at all until the very last scene, so what was the point of him even being brought up or included? What is the point of everyone dying if the plot unravels to not be a campy murder mystery after all? That's not fun!

If this was meant to lampoon Gen Z/Tik Tok culture and how people like the group bastardize mental health language & AAVE, it did not come across that way to me. It came off as those stereotypes playing Among Us But You Actually Die (and even then it's a stretch considering the ending).

4/10.

[ckret2]

How do you have the willpower to not consume content from any of your other fandoms? I always get pulled in and out of the same ones and it stops me from getting projects done but I get so bored! Teach me your ways!

So the downside of ADHD is that it takes a ridiculously high amount of effort to push yourself to do things—even things you want to do and like doing—unless you put even more effort upfront into making it convenient for yourself.

But the upside is, if you know this about yourself, and if there's media you want to not be consuming, you just...... don't do anything to make it convenient to consume.

I don't have Amazon Prime. All I have to do is not bother to get Amazon Prime (easy!!) and not bother to hunt out a way to watch Hazbin some other way (also easy!!) and bam, I've got a 100% success rate of not watching it.

Do you know how many Transformers series I'm currently behind on? I sure don't! Because I haven't put the effort into looking it up! I can't be assed! There's like, at least three I think! Don't tell me, I'm not currently interested in finding out!! It would take work for me to figure it out; I can just go "work?? Naaah. Not doing that."

You can resist temptation by just being too lazy to pursue it! Make that ADHD work for YOU!

Caution: if you can't get yourself to put effort into doing anything that brings you pleasure, that's either Pretty Serious Depression or it's gonna cause Pretty Serious Depression and it's not good. However. If you master the art of ADHD, you can save up the effort you didn't put into distractions, and use it to put effort into different activities that also make you happy.

Last year I picked up a podcast about cults. It's all right. But because I'm already listening to it and spotify keeps pushing it to the top of my screen, when I need a low-effort audio distraction, it's easier for me to default to putting on the podcast about cults than it would be for me to, say, dig up The Magnus Protocol to start it. And bam! Now I'm doing more research that'll help me write about a cult leader, for free, by listening to a podcast I'm not at risk of hyperfixating on!

Part of avoiding breaking your own hyperfixation is figuring out what media you enjoy, but don't hyperfixate on. Because you still need to, like, have fun. That's why you wanna watch The Things You Like, because it's fun. If you're not having fun you'll wanna go watch The Things You Like, and rightly so. So you've gotta make sure you're having enough fun with things you don't hyperfixate on.

Like, I know that when I watch Columbo or read Poirot, I find the detectives charming while I'm observing them, and then almost as soon as the mystery is over I stop thinking about them. They aren't the kind of characters that latch into my brain. I know they won't become blorbos. So I'm safe there. I know I enjoy horror movies but 99% of the time totally forget who the characters are, like if there's 2 white guys and 2 white girls it is guaranteed I won't be able to tell them apart, so they're safe to watch, I'm not gonna hyperfixate on them. I know that I enjoy nonfiction/educational books & podcasts, but I only hyperfixate on fiction, so it's safe for me to pick up nonfiction. If it's nonfiction that's somehow thematically relevant to whatever I'm currently hyperfixated on, it even helps feed the current hyperfixation.

And those are my "protect your hyperfixation" lifehacks.

On the other hand, if you, anon, don't personally have ADHD, then I can't help you. idk how people with executive function function.

Final advice: if you know you keep falling in and out of the same 3 or 4 fandoms, maybe try writing a crossover fic about all 3 or 4 fandoms at once. That way it won't matter which one you're currently into. You win no matter what. I've never actually tried this, don't trust this advice.

[bimboficationblues]

2024 was a mixed bag. I spent a lot of it malding about my job, but fortunately I am no longer there and have a new one (family lawyer for DV survivors). Idk if I want to keep being a lawyer long term but rn I am making more money, doing more interesting (but potentially taxing) work, and hopefully it will level out to something either tolerable or useful.

long distance with my love is still sad, and we found that polyamory did not really alleviate those pressures, but we have taken some good steps towards a different approach, starting with a monogamy trial run. I found dating around mostly unpleasant despite some exciting possibilities throughout the year - very few people seem to really know what they want and act accordingly. ultimately poly started to feel like I was chasing after an ideal, and I do believe I’d enjoy that ideal. but when the process of pursuing it is so exhausting and unfun and crazy-making it just doesn’t seem worth it. the lesbian connections I found frequently ended because the other person started acting like an avoidant abject meow meow and I simply don’t have the patience.

as far as bringing the long distance to a close, I'm not sure how that’s gonna happen - I love Chicago and I don't want to leave my people. for the first time since maybe high school I do not feel fundamentally lonely and I think that's a feeling worth taking seriously. I've been really overjoyed by my various friendships, both near and far. but I miss my gf dearly. she has my heart. I don’t feel like I’ve ever loved or been loved like this. It’s a difficult situation.

I did get to travel a lot which was nice - this year in addition to regular Washington visits, including one to Olympic National Park, I also went to Barcelona, Toronto, Montreal, Cleveland, and Philadelphia. I am visiting my love's hometown currently and while I was kind of dreading it a bit it's turned out to be overall very pleasant and comforting and nice to see where she came from. Plus I did some visits to the family in SC.

speaking of which, I am feeling generally at ease with my parents. I feel like I've been able to accept that they are limited people, but not to such a degree that it makes being around them impossible, and they have also generally gotten cooler about a lot of things. we have a lot in common and it is generally fun to spend time with them despite their foibles. being able to do drugs together also helps. my dad turned 60 this year and my mom has been having health issues, which I do think has made entropy be on my mind a lot more to a troubling degree. dunno how I’ll handle that when it becomes a more pressing consideration but I guess that’s a problem for the future.

last January I made a conscious effort to approach my passions and hobbies more intentionally by making a daily schedule that roughly looked like this:

MONDAY - fiction reading; TUESDAY - history studies; WEDNESDAY - philosophy/political theory studies/writing; THURSDAY - working on music; FRIDAY - watching movies.

I also tried to get some daily activities going on top of all these - listening to at least one full album a day, regular walks, practicing guitar, yoga. keeping to this was inconsistent - sometimes I was locked in and sometimes I'd get derailed by other priorities (spending time with the love, seeing my lovely friends, getting stoned, travel). sometimes certain activities are just easier (reading comics is always fun and also minimally demanding of my energy, social media and doomscrolling is a tempting time-sink). I might try and revise this approach in some ways - I might want to take a harder tack with how much time I want to spend on each activity - but I do think that even just being deliberate and structured about how I spend my time made my mental state significantly stronger. so that is a positive development.

artistically I've made progress on the album, but I never feel like I have enough time to dedicate to it with work and everything else. but I also think my approach of trying to write all the songs first before recording them was the wrong one. so instead I think I'm going to start trying to get what I've roughly finished into a recorded form and in the process a stronger vision of the project will emerge which will help with future songs. this will require me to learn some new skills - I've always worked with a producer before - but that's not a bad thing. my friends and I are also doing a writing workshop so that will be nice to get feedback from people I love and trust.

social media has been real bad for me this past year in a kind of emotionally masochistic way - I found myself hatereading a lot more, which is bad. I’m hoping I can adjust that this year and stop getting brain damage from pissing myself off.

part of the reason for the above is that the political situation domestically and globally is dire and basically I just see cope or rationalization everywhere which, considering the urgency and scope and existential weight of what’s happening, is really infuriating to me. I feel like after a year of some of the most depraved inhuman butchery imaginable, as the ruling class takes refuge in obvious bad faith that is “all the more odious because it is less and less likely to deceive,” and with Hitleritis running rampant through civil society, we need a sober reflection on the challenge ahead of us as socialists. I do not want the ruling class to annihilate the rest of us with them or for capital to find new, intensified, and more insidious methods of shifting crisis around. this is partly why anti-intellectual, regressive forms of Marxism have been stuck in my craw lately, because it feels like psychological palliatives masquerading as politics. I’m not sure what the move is to really turn the tides of the war we are in, but doing away with self-deceiving political impulses seems like a start.

[rosearcanaeum]

(Ten) people I'd like to know better

Tagged by: @screechingfromthevoid <3

Last song: Far From Me by Chase Noseworthy is just on repeat. Sad boy Vax and perfect for my range!

Favorite color: it really depends on context honestly. But the most general is soft pink.

Last book: 😅 I've been struggling through Nein Eyes of Lucien for a while.... more honestly its Call of the Netherdeep and Explorers Guide to Wildemount. I truely read far more fanfic than anything else.

Last movie: I watched Night at the Museum for the first time this week. It was waaaaaay better than I ever imagined. I knew it was good and funny. It was also incredibly sincere and I can't get enough of that.

Last show: speaking of sincere, I'm about halfway through Frieren: beyond journey's end. And holy shit! I have never seen any media with a character who views and interacts with death the way i do. Its pretty heavy as shows go but its trustworthy. (I have a hard time with new stuff most of the time. Cr is one exception and this is too apparently)

Sweet/spicy/savory: no joke I've eaten salt before lol. But i prefer combos or all 3. Sweet spicy is underrated.

Relationship status: I live with my queer platonic partner. Its still just buckwild to me. As a kid i hated the idea of living with a partner cuz i didnt want so many aspects of what i was told that looked like. But hey guess what, y'all can decide what your relationships look like. We have separate rooms, are not sexually involved, rarely even touch tbh. And we love each other very much and want to grow old together in a house with cats.

They're touch averse and I'm sensory seeking. My fun Sunday night (out dancing) is their nightmare. But because we are who we are and how we understand and communicate in our relationship we rely on each other for only things that are available. I'll tell them all the dumb shit i see and do on Grindr and we'll sit on the couch and knit together.

Also my brain nearly explodes everytime I realize not only do we do couple stuff, we have couple friends we do couple stuff with. 18 year old me would have never believed you if you told them.

Last thing I looked up: I looked up the caffeine content of the thai tea concentrate I got my partner to see if i could try it. And shockingly i should be able to. Still gonna eat first and be careful though.

Current obsession: I'm pretty spread out rn, unusually. Ive got a sweater im excited about. And I'm on my 3rd attempt at a dorym water bottle sleeve I'm designing. This one should work now. Honestly dorym is probably no. 1 on my list. I shipped that back in exu, along with a bunch of stuff cuz I'm a delightful multishipper. So i feel particularly excited about dorym finally taking off. But also that while dorian was always looking to orym if anything else had come along he was there for the ride. I love robbie so so much. He is such a good character storyteller!

Looking forward to: today im hanging with 2 friends im usually in a larger group with so thats gonna be fun. Looking forward to baking off the beef wellingtons i made for my partner for xmas. And im looking forward to being able to work full time again in the new year. Ive been on part time for health reasons and stayed because i was spending hours on the phone fighting for insurance coverage. Now that both a done i can work more. I love my job and its a particular kind of boredom that i get when i cant work. Lol speaking of, im looking forward to the holidays being over. The office closures normally screw us but now im only working thurs fri for the next 2 weeks and I'll have try really hard to keep busy enough. At least my partner has 2 of the days off with me!

No pressure tags; not sure I can get to 10 and please dont feel obligated but I'd love to see yours (if you havent already. Ive been avoiding spoilers a lot recently so may not have seen it): @vigilante-apologist @standbyyourmantis @soedblackchaos @forestthechonkykitty @corrrvid @local-redhead-bookworm and luddles looks like you did already do this.

Thats all i got. If you see this and want to do it, consider yourself tagged!

[mlmmetalhead]

Closeted Ethan hcs.

Male reader

sfw & nsfw (divided)

A/n: what was supposed to be a couple of hcs turned into a story of sorts, with headcanons following. This is a mess, but I hope you'll enjoy it.

FEM ALIGNED DNI

SFW

He never really as much though of not being straight.

It's more like he never really was attracted to any girls, but got into a relationship or two because of peer pressure. It never worked out in the end, of course. The girls were never satisfied with what he was able to give them.

He felt guilty, really, he did. Didn't know what was wrong, tried to watch some of those pick up gurus on social media, but all the advice seemed pointless.

He did have crushes on boys throughout his life, but never knew they were crushes. Everyone feels like that sometimes, right?

And then he met Y/n.

A cute, selfless, interesting to talk to guy. He was also pretty open about his sexuality, and Ethan supported him!

They weren't best friends per se, but they hung out a lot when the group was together, and enjoyed talking to to each other.

The time they spent together felt great. Even if it wasn't anything crazy, just going to get coffee or something, Ethan always felt amazing in those moments, no matter how short they were.

It was only when Y/n got a boyfriend, something changed.

Jim. An another film major. Arrogant, loud, self-centred, oh, why did Y/n even choose someone like him? They didn't belong together at all!

And the worst thing is, whenever they went somewhere with the group, that annoying guy started going with them!

Everyone seemed to like him a lot. Ethan couldn't understand it even if he tried. There was absolutely nothing to like about him!

So Landry almost stopped hanging out with his friends, at least when Y/n and Jim were there.

The theme came up at a movie party at Sam and Tara's. Y/n and his boyfriend already left, to which Ethan breathed out in relief.

"Why do you hate their relationship so much?" Tara turned to him, eating what was left of the popcorn.

"What? I don't hate it! It's... I don't care. They can do whatever they want." Landry crossed his arms on his chest in defence.

"He suddenly became homophobic when Y/n actually got a boyfriend." Anika giggled.

"Nah, more like he's jealous." Mindy chimed in.

"What? Don't be ridiculous, I'm not jealous!" Ethan almost shouted with offence clearly painted on his features.

"Oooh, you totally are!" Tara laughed.

"Okay, you're being irrational here. Who am I even jealous of? Y/n? Why would I be?"

"You're not jealous of Y/n, you're jealous because of him!" Mindy exclaimed.

Ethan opened his mouth to respond, but found his words stuck in his throat. He sat there for a minute, and then got up to leave.

"I need to think this through." He explained, putting his jacket on.

"The closet is made out of glass!" Anika shouted when the door closed behind him.

That took a LONG time thinking through. I mean not like a day or two, but more like a couple of months.

Through all this time Ethan made an effort to shield himself from any interactions with L/n. He didn't need more sexuality crisis then what was going on currently.

But alas, he was pulled out to a party by Chad, of course he was. No words could convince the guy to let him stay.

"You've been alone rotting by yourself for the longest time, we need to find you at least someone!"

And that's how he got here. Sitting in someone's backyard with music blasting from the house. He was lucky no one was shagging here, that's for sure.

"Hey E! Didn't know you were here, too!"

With dread spreading through his chest, Ethan looked up to see the very guy he was trying to avoid this whole time smiling at him, just walked out of the house.

"Yeah. I didn't want to come." Landry looked away, trying to look like the bushes were the most interesting thing in the world.

"...hey, I'm sorry, okay? Can- can you tell me what happened, please? What did I do?" Y/n's sorry voice rang in the cool spring air, making Landry's heart almost stop.

"What are you talking about?"

"I mean, everything was great, we had chemistry or something, and then you suddenly just... Stop talking to me. Without an explanation or anything. What happened, E? I really... I really liked what we had, y'know? I want to try and bring that back."

A silence fell upon the two as Ethan tried to think of a plausible answer.

"You didn't do anything, it's a me problem. I still like you, Y/n."

L/n smiled faintly. "Well, what's the problem then? Maybe I can help you... Figure it out?"

Landry shifted in his place, awkwardly coughing in his fist, as faint red dust covered his cheeks. "Isn't your boyfriend gonna be worried about where you are? Maybe you should check on him."

"Who, Jim? Oh, we broke up a couple of weeks ago."

"Really?" Shit, that sounded a lot more enthusiastic then Ethan was ready for

"Yeah, I don't even know why, his initiative."

"Oh, I'm..." Landry tried to compose himself, and not let the for some reason wildly beating heart take over, "I'm so... Really sorry, Y/n. That must've been awful."

L/n shrugged at that. "I got over it pretty quickly. We didn't exactly have a deep connection or anything like that."

Ethan couldn't stop his hands from fidgeting when he finally got the courage to open his mouth. "Okay, I will tell you what my problem is, if you promise not to laugh! Or tell anyone!"

"I promise." Y/n had a serious expression on his face, despite the slight smile still lingering on his lips.

Landry took a deep breath before continuing: "I think... I might... I might prefer boys over girls."

An another round of silence ensued, making Ethan sweat from nervousness.

"Oh dude that's... That's awesome. I'm so happy for you." Y/n took him in for a hug, leaving Ethan startled for a moment. "Sorry for being so selfish but did you... Did you realize because of me?"

Landry gulped. "I... Possibly? I don't know how I feel about you, but when you were with Jim I felt... Weird."

"There's only one way to find out."

"Wh- what do you mean, exactly?" Ethan could feel a mix of worry and excitement creep up his back again.

"I think you know what I mean." Y/n said in a low voice, leaning closer to his face. "Kiss me, man."

That didn't take much convincing.

The kiss felt sweet and a little awkward, Ethan wasn't a very experienced kisser, but all he lacked was made up by Y/n.

After that party, they started talking again, with more sweet talk implemented.

The word 'boyfriends' scared Landry a little, and even if everyone around them called them just that, he didn't want to use it.

But Y/n didn't mind, he understood the stress the poor boy was going through and didn't want to double down on it.

So they were just friends.

Friends who are far more affectionate with each other.

Friends who stay at each other's dorms and sleep in each other's beds, cuddled up.

Friends who have no problem kissing each other when they're in private.

Yeah, that type of friends.

Ethan was insanely nervous about coming out to others, especially his family.

So most likely, it was L/n who brought the news over to the others when they both were ready.

Luckily, everyone in the group was super supportive of Y/n's and Ethan's relationship when they finally told everyone. But his family still stays in the shadows.

He wants to be affectionate everywhere, but he's also nervous. So no PDA in public.

But when it's alone time? Oh boy, he won't calm down, because his boyfriend is now his bed and his stuffed toy for hugging and kissing.

The boy is painfully touchstarved, and his partner quickly learns that.

Dates are never a problem, even if it's just a quick meetup in-between lectures, Ethan remembers that. I think he keeps a box of different stuff other people will consider junk, but for him, it's memories of the dates with Y/n.

He also sometimes wish he could draw, just so that he could draw pictures of his boyfriend.

Ethan's love language is mostly gifts and quality time. He never was able to really put his feelings into words, so little trinkets will do.

He almost behaves like a cat, leaving it on his boyfriend's bed or putting it with a little note in his bag, for the life of him, he can't just give presents normally.

NSFW

Actually, it has been long before he came out when Ethan started jerking off to gay porn.

He never really wanted to think why it turned him on so much, it just did and he didn't give it much thought, as long as it felt good.

He never experimented with pleasuring himself anally, but he couldn't picture himself being on top.

Here's the truth: Ethan's not just a virgin, a turbovirgin. He came in his pants the first couple of times he and Y/n made out.

He's so extremely loud, his boyfriend may need to gag him, as he moans at the smallest bit of touch.

Even though it will take a while before he would be able to get to penetration, sucking cock quickly became one of, if not the favourite bedroom activity.

He could drop on his knees anywhere any time if it was needed, and he always drooled a lot, providing enough lube.

It's possible he has an oral fixation at this point, but no matter the cause: he's great at taking it in his mouth, isn't this what matters?

His thighs are super sensitive, every time L/n's hands brush over them, even if it's not intentionally, Landry can hardly contain a moan.

He isn't into anything crazy in particular, but later he discovers his love towards overstimulation.

There's just something so satisfying in being pounded and played with again and again, hardly staying conscious while being covered in spit, sweat and other possible bodily fluids.

As we established, he's a bottom. At first, it was a little hard, but the second Y/n's cock hit Ethan's prostate for the first time, all the worries were gone.

Absolutely loves being taken, feeling helpless and soft while his sweet spot is being driven into.

His moans during intercourse resemble a girl's pretty good, so Y/n's and Ethan's neighbours still didn't get any questions.

If he's a little more eager, loves sitting on his boyfriend's lap or riding him, being in somewhat of control.

His lips always get so swollen and red by the time they finish since he bites them so much.

Hides any marks were thoroughly because he doesn't want to be embarrassed, but he does have a secret fantasy of just parading his lover's marks on his body freely, letting everyone know he's taken.

[dorothytheexplorothy]

People I'd like to know better tag game!

tagged by @the-least-undefinable-ordinal

I don't get what the game is so I just stole their template lol hope that's ok

last song: been listening to Nir Knaan's new album on loop, espפסטה בשמנת (= Pasta with Cream Sauce) - [my interpretation is] it's a waltz about a guy making pasta for his partner who, unbeknownst to him, is just about to break up with him, as a metaphor for a love story between the guy and the pasta, itself a metaphor for eating disorders. it has so many ingenious pieces of lyrics (for example, it uses the word "ta'ale", which is both the third-person future feminine and the imperative male form of "go up" - so both "she'll (the partner) go up by stairs" and "(talking to himself) you, go up by stairs"). it fills me with such love of art. there's also a beautiful music clip for it on youtube

favourite colour: probably light blue - I like how calming it is; also, it has its own word in hebrew ("tkhelet", which actually used to mean "purple") and that's cool too

last book: I don't like reading, but uhh I sometimes leaf through Winning Ways for your Mathematical Plays bc I'm irrevocably conway-pilled

last movie: rewatched Glass Onion (: A Knives Out Mystery) bc I was bored. not as exciting on the second watch but whatchugonnado

last tv show: Ranma ½ (the netflix reboot)!! I like trans media what can I say, I only wish it could've been made with a more modern mindset, there's some missed potential. I'm also planning on watching the original after that bc the animation there is so pretty. also watching Brooklyn 99 bc I'm a comedy nerd

sweet/spicy/savoury: savoury :) I've had depression and anxiety, there's no other answer

relationship status: single and way too scared to mingle

last thing I googled: idk but my newest open tab is the nlab page on reflective subcategories - opened it bc I wanted to know what they are, left it open bc I don't get adjunctions :(

current obsession: just found a series on yt called "therapist plays Slay the Princess" (by Euro Brady). I love(!!!) Slay the Princess (still best trans allegory!!! and no one gets it), and the therapist is so empathetic and sharp, it's really fun watching them try to understand it (they haven't mentioned gender so far but I still agree with a lot of their analysis)

looking forward to: uhhh nothing I can think of rn. my main emotion is anxiety lately :( but soon I'm traveling to the US (and meeting my ex-wife🤭) even if it's just for a bit!! that's something! and I'm waiting for some bureaucratic stuff to go through so hopefully things start moving again

tags: @jansjo, @hewsos-from-lesbos, @thegneurshk, @bubbliterally, sorry if any of you got tagged already. also - anyone who wants to play and hasn't been tagged - say I tagged you and I'll edit this post to say that, no one has to know >:3

[transgenderteensurvivalguide]

my dysphoria has been very bad recently and i have found it very difficult to do things like showering, changing and sleeping especially. ive been over wearing my binder a lot because i find it very difficult to bring myself to take it off, and i keep wearing it for 30+ hours at a time which i know is bad but i currently have no other alternative and not wearing one feels worse than the pain i get by overwearing. i hate wearing sports bras and ive run out of transtape, i have ordered more but it probably won’t be coming for another couple of weeks. i don’t know what to do because i don’t want to damage my body severely, is there anything else i can do?

Lee says:

As you know, wearing a binder for extended periods can lead to severe health issues, including respiratory problems, rib fractures, and skin conditions.

When you feel like doing something that's harming you physically is your only option to cope because your dysphoria is that intense, you should look into getting a therapist.

Frequently binding for 30+ hours isn't a sustainable option and finding alternative coping strategies will be easier with professional help to help you deal with what you're doing through.

Two posts that might help with your specific questions are Staying clean and coping with shower-related dysphoria and Dysphoria when you have to sleep and those two posts really cover most of what I have to say on those subjects so I won't reinvent the wheel by typing the same thing but I encourage you to read both links.

Apart from that, in the next couple of weeks as you wait for your TransTape to arrive (And start the process of seeking a therapist!) here are some strategies you can try doing:

1. Layered Clothing:

Wearing loose, layered clothing can help obscure the chest area. Consider wearing baggy shirts, jackets, or vests to help reduce the visibility of your chest.

Luckily it's fall time (at least here in the East Coast) so it's starting to get a little bit cooler, some days, and I wear a sweater (at work) or sweatshirt (when at home) like 100% of the time just because I'm always cold and it's also an Autistic sensory friendly thing for me too.

See more: Body neutrality

2. Distraction Techniques:

Engage in activities that take your mind off your dysphoria. This could be reading, drawing, journaling, listening to music, watching movies or TV, or any other hobby or activity that you enjoy and find absorbing.

Engage in self-care activities that actually make you feel good about yourself, not just doomscrolling social media. And for those times when you are on social media, if you're currently following anyone who makes you stressed/unhappy, stop following them. It's your feed and you're in charge!

But if you find that it's hard to do the necessary activities of everyday living because you find yourself spending most of your time engaging in distraction techniques, and you're falling behind on homework/work, that's another sign that you need additional support from a mental health professional.

3. Grounding Techniques:

Practicing mindfulness can help you stay present and reduce distressing thoughts, but the kind of nebulous meditation stuff never worked well for my ADHD brain.

Guided meditation

15 meditation tips

How to do progressive muscle relaxation

Body scan relaxation exercise

Mindfulness skills and worksheets masterpost

Imagery

Imagery self-help

Relaxation

Relaxation audio

Safe-place visualization

I found specific things like grounding exercises, like the "5-4-3-2-1" technique (identifying five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, and one you can taste), can help divert your attention from dysphoric feelings if you're having a Moment. This type of strategy is useful when you start to notice yourself spiraling to try and re-center yourself.

Soothing grounding exercise

Physical grounding exercise

Mental grounding exercise

Grounding techniques

How to make a grounding box

Grounding exercises

How to ground and center

4. Stay connected:

Connect with in-person and/or online LGBTQ+ support groups who understand what you're going through. Sharing your feelings and hearing from others who have similar experiences can be comforting and it can help you to learn new coping strategies and things to try.

In general, avoiding isolation is important. Join a club or volunteer for something, join a sports team, hang out with your friends, etc. Just don't stay alone in your room. Get out of the house if you can, or invite people over or have video calls or phone calls if aren't up to being out and about. Just stay in contact with people.

See more: Motivating yourself to socialize

5. Set Alarms:

Consider setting alarms or reminders to take off your binder and give your body a break. Even short breaks can help reduce the risk of injury.

Here are some links that may help in general:

9 strategies for dealing with body dysphoria

How do I deal with dysphoria?

20 Small Things To Do When Gender Dysphoria Gets You Down

25 Things I Do To Make My Body Dysphoria Feel Smaller and Quieter

More on coping with dysphoria

Dealing with dysphoria

A post with suggestions for coping with dysphoria

Take care of your mental health

8 tips for managing dysphoria and mental health

A coping tip

Disablity-friendly dysphoria tips

Dysphoria that prevents you from leaving the house/doing activities of daily living

Your feelings are valid, and it's essential to find ways to manage your dysphoria that prioritize your health and well-being. There isn't a secret dysphoria cure I can share with you, to be frank it just sucks sometimes and there's not a lot to do about it but you gotta find a way to cope and keep going and stay safe.

Eventually it gets better-- you either find a way to cope more effectively and manage the dysphoria and/or time just passes and you grow older and eventually find a way to access surgery, but either way you will eventually become an adult who is managing life somehow and overall doin' okay and yeah there's hope at the end of the tunnel so please keep going!

You deserve care, support, and understanding, even if your family isn't able to provide that right now. And again, apart from the two links that I started the response with, the main advice I have is that you should ask to speak with a therapist (even if you are closeted and don't tell your fam that it's gender/binding/dysphoria related) and just let them know that you're struggling with your mental health in general.

Please reach out for help if you need it, and consider seeking medical attention if you experience severe pain or discomfort from binding. Good luck!!

As some of you may have noticed, our blog has been around for a decade or so and some links may be broken because we're all busy etc so pls let me know if something is wonky in a post I'm trying to link to!

Followers, any advice for anon?

[gigglesandfreckles-hp]

thank you @annabtg for the tag! xx

three ships: it's funny because usually romantic ships are what i'm least interested in within media...jily is literally my one exception and i'm obviously feral for them. i'll try reading anything at least once though! i'm just usually more interested in the complexities of familial and platonic relationships.

first ship: same answer...james/lily

last song: back to december by taylor swift (for...a...fic-related...reason)

last movie: coco

currently reading: the small and the mighty by sharon mcmahon

currently watching: the only thing ever on the television at our home is sport. baseball and football, most of the time, with a sprinkling of american football and basketball. i work in education, so i don't have an attention span for dramatic shows or immature comedies honestly. which probably makes me boring...but i'll stick with my comfort sport programmes.

currently eating: it's 10pm so i've just finished a cuppa tea and need ot resist the urge to make another or i'll be using the toilet all night, ha!

currently craving: the edible cookie dough bites from crumbl cookie! and for my toddler to get over her 'can i sleep in youuuuuur bed mummy?' phase 🥲

Tagging: anyone who hasn't done this and would like to! (i've seen a lot of these curculating, so don't want to risk being redundant in tagging specifics xx)

[solarwynd]

https://www.tumblr.com/solarwynd/765358565733072896/i-feel-a-bit-burnt-out-on-big-pop-songs-nowadays?source=share

Sorry this isn't really Jimin related but I was thinking about this today. Caveat I know there's a lot of great music and talented musicians who are doing cool stuff around but my gripe is that we're getting less and less mainstream exposure to it and all my points are specifically about how exposed the gp is to it, not people who are deep in a particular genre or the indie scene

For one thing the alt pop, rock, edm, britpop and punk genre has totally shrunk in on itself in the mainstream compared to about a decade or two ago. Hip hop and rap have generally expanded to sort of replace that void but this year has been disappointing I think? Is it just me? Apart from the KL - Drake beef in the summer ofc. I'm glad Latin music, afrobeats and kpop is getting bigger but it's also centered on a few big names imo, rather than being full fledged established genres. I'm no expert but that's my layman assessment. Countrys getting bigger but I dislike country so this is bad news for me 😭

But also do you remember when tv series used to try to promote artists? Sure they'd play some current radio hits or oldies and it still happens once in a while like running up that hill with stranger things but we used to get 22 episodes with at least a few indie songs playing in the past. Now that series are getting shorter and shorter, it's had this unexpected side effect of limiting that kind of exposure. Also does anyone feel mainstream movie soundtracks are getting worse too? I think it's cause most of them are marvel Disney movies and they're pretty barren from a soundscape pov. Using Justin Timberlake's bye bye bye during the Deadpool opening scene? Some of the most uninspired shit I've seen in a while.

Even the films that released as musicals this year - all of them are recycling songs from their original theatrical productions like wicked or mean girls or they don't have any new songs at all like joker folie a deux. I don't know if it's because I aged out of watching them, but it also feels like Disney channel used to have more music in general for their teen audience - high school musical movies, camp rock, victorious, Hannah Montana, descendants - need to ask some kids if they still have shows or movies like these still. Again I don't know if I aged out of this either but Disney also used to just release more animated movies with original music right? Not just releasing lion king and Mulan or whatever again with the same songs slightly tweaked with new singers. Also this is apropos of nothing but remember when glee was a thing 😭

But even as TV and movies were getting less musically diverse, I feel like in the late 2010s and around the pandemic, Tiktok, Snapchat, social media in general was taking its place and exposing people to new music. The problem is that music labels quickly caught on and nowadays tiktok is also the same roster of top 40 hits as radio with influencers being paid to dance to a song or tiktok being paid so-called heating deals to promote certain songs. Same thing with Spotify. Spotify has always had paid playlists but the way they push the same songs over and over again now is crazy.

Anyway I sound like old man yells at clouds so I'm going to stop griping and start actively seeking out new music outside what's trending. I was just curious if other people also feel this narrowing or if it's just me

This is such a good assessment and I agree with you.

[beast-mode-on]

2025 Living Project, Year of Intentionality

In lieu of what is normally called New Year's Resolutions, in this new year I am embarking on a year long project.

The project is open-ended, and will probably have elements added to it as it goes on, but broadly focuses on intentionality, with the ideas of expanding knowledge, and deepening connections with people being secondary ideas.

This project is highly informed by CGP Grey's video Your Theme, so while I will start out with, and probably maintain well defined goals, they will adapt to whatever my current needs are, and "failing" them does not constitute failing the project. Its an excercise, I'm trying to build things I don't think I already have.

This blog will be devoted to chronicling this project. I hope to make daily updates, but at the very least, I'll make weekly ones.

Current goals:

Intentionality: I've entitled this as the Year of Intentionality for a reason, I currently think that consistent intentionality is the thing I need to work on the most. In the past, when I've tried to work on intentionality, I have broadly focused on not using social media, which is extraordinarily difficult, and quite frankly not fun. Thus, I want to focus the other way, and instead of taking away, my goals will focus on adding in things I love and really want to do, but find hard to make time for (despite the fact that I have plenty of time for them and they usually represent a net positive energy.) I want to read one book every month. Once a week, I want to sit down and watch a movie, all the way through. Once a week, I want to go for an hour walk in some sort of nature. At least once a week, I want to sit down and play a video game for an hour, and give it my full attention. If this seems lenient, that's because the goal is things that are attainable. But also yeah, these are the kinds of things that are sometimes hard for me to do.

Knowledge: This is harder to create goals for, as I, not knowing the things I need to know, do not know what things I need to know. I'm going to have to continuously reevalutate my goals here. The general guiding principle is to eliminate places where I've made judgements without proper evaluation. We're going to start small.

My music horizons are actually disturbingly small, I want to listen to one new song every other day. I want to start studying religions, because growing up Christian did not give me a holistic view. I want to learn a lot more about other countries. Connection: I don't really have anything specific here, but there are some friends who I want to meet up with in person within a month or two.

Main blog:

@beastimus

[yuusishi]

Hmmm. Could I request Ace, Cater and Jamil with an s/o who's a stage magician but does actual magic?

. . . FOR MY NEXT TRICK!

pairings : Ace Trappola, Cater Diamond, Jamil Viper x gn!reader (sep.)

genre : fluff

cws/tws : none

a/n : I'm currently going through a Black Butler phase hashtag help. Also I made this generally s/o who’s a stage magician cuz I didn’t really understand the “but does actual magic” part

Ace Trappola !!

Your number 1 hypeman, but sneakily (sometimes).

He goes to all of your performances, using them as motivation to get all of his homework and studies done to make it to the venue in time.

Loves all your performances. You’d tease him that he was so focused on it earlier, but he’d say he wasn’t as if he wasn’t completely in a trance by the flashiness and the clever tricks you pulled.

Ace already loves doing card tricks, what more if his partner is a whole magician? He’d ask to teach him some simple magic tricks to brag about to his brother.

Speaking of his brother, Ace would send videos of your performances every time he went to one and gush about how cool it looked in person, leading to his brother making fun of him (affectionately) for being such a simp for his little partner.

If you ever perform at NRC itself, he would NOT shut up to the rest of the first years to join him to watch. All of them either joined in to support you (Deuce, Jack, Epel) or just to get Ace to shut up (Sebek).

He’d be in the audience silently screaming to himself “That’s my s/o!!”.

He'd buy all your merch (that he can afford) but keep it somewhere hidden because he knows he'll get the teasing of a lifetime if you or his brother found out about it.

Cater Diamond

Your number 1 hypeman, but extremely obvious.

He has an entire highlight on his Magicam account full of pictures and videos that he took when he attends your performances.

Secretly manages a fan account of you, he tries to use filter combinations that doesn’t look too similar to his usual style on his main to not make it obvious it's him.

Possibly even made edits for that account.

Even if you weren’t a performer you’d still be all over his Magicam story, he’s there with you before and after your time on stage to congratulate and praise you.

Another one that buys all your merch, but he posts it on his social media accounts and keeps them somewhere in his room (possibly his nightstand).

He'd love to be part of your performances too!! Especially using Split Card for disappearance acts or tricks that will make it look like you cloned him.

(He hopes people from NRC aren't there, that would just spoil the act if they know his UM!!)

He'd try to learn little magic tricks from Ace to play with you a little, you end up trying to one up each other sometimes.

Jamil Viper !!

He doesn't really have the time to attend every single one of your performances like the other two, but tries to spare little time to attend them at least twice a month, maybe 3 if he's lucky.

Kalim would buy your merch for him since he couldn't always go to your performances, resulting in Jamil accepting them but very embarrassed.

It's worse if you or any other dorm members are there to see it.

He'd probably keep the merch on his nightstand too or has a dedicated drawer for it inside his dorm room. Generally somewhere not extremely obvious (minus the nightstand option).

Honestly he's incredibly impressed you managed to make a name for yourself with something very uncommon like being a stage magician, especially at your age. Actors like Vil aren't unusual since movies and series are still big, but stage magic are usually just things for children.

He’d also help you prepare for your next performance if you have any!! But clothing and grooming are as far as he can get, you wouldn’t want to spoil the act for him, would you?

Just like Cater, he’d also be with you before and after the performance if he gets to attend, congratulating you on yet another successful show.

[greencloakedfae]

Thanks for the tag @ferociouslycreativemystery :D

3 non romantic duos:

1. Charles Devereux & Nell Jackson

I mean ofc. They're both such little shits on their own and when they're together they just amplify that in eachother. The way they just mess with eachother, trying to set eachother up for embarrassment when pretending to be Lord and Lady Shankley having tea with the rich people, insulting eachothers wanted posters, and their entire exchange with Nell pretending to be a doctor. They fall into such a great duo almost instantly, and I think that they could have been great emotional support for eachother if we had seen more of their relationship in a second season. All the fanfic for their platonic relationship written holds a special place in my heart.

2. Merlin & Gwen

Merlin will forever be one of my hyperfixations I come back to over and over again, and these two are always so sweet together. I wish we got more of their friendship in later seasons, but early show Merlin and Gwen is so special.

3. Ellie and Joel

The Last of Us will probably always be one of my favourite video game series. Both because the story of both games is absolutely amazing, but also because I played both games and then watched the show with my dad, and being able to enjoy it together was just really fun and sweet.

A ship that might surprise others: I mean I'll happily entertain almost any ship of any type of dynamic so there's probably heaps that fall into this category. But staying on blog theme I've been turning over the chaotic mess that would be a Polly/Nell/Sofia ship in my mind a bit lately, especially Polly/Sofia honestly.

I feel like all dynamics at all stages would be really interesting to play with. Especially cause Polly and Sofia probably represent what they each hate about upperclass society to eachother, with Polly being hyperfocused on romance and more 'frivolous' things, and Sofia on the more business side of social heriachy and such. But they're both women who just want control over their own lives to do what they want rather than what others want them to do, and they're both intelligent and strong women in their own rights, and I feel like they would respect that in eachother once they get past the initial surface level distaste. Then throw in Nell, forced into the middle of this strange situation thanks to the other two's crushes/obsessions/whatever you wanna call it, just trying to get on with her life and not quite sure what to do about the attention (but also not really hating it) (at least from Polly, she probably would not appreciate Sofia's attention, especially at the start lets be real). I'm gonna stop before this post accidentally becomes a headcanon dump, but many thoughts are brewing if anyone is interested lmao.

Last song: Wishing Well by The Oh Hellos. Been on a big The Oh Hellos and The Crane Wives kick the last few months. Just really fun, story telling songs (that are great for applying to fictional characters lmao)

Last film: JOY - The Birth of IVF. Ofc I watched this cause Louisa Harland is in it, but I fully recommend it to anyone. It was such a good movie and a really interesting story, and I definitely think I cried a little. It's streaming on Netflix if you're interested.

Currently reading: I'm so slack at the moment with reading, but I've got a few in my TBR. Mainly the rest of the Lockwood and Co series, but also Celestial Monsters (which is the second book to The Sunbearer Trials by Aiden Thomas, and I absolutely loved that book)

Currently watching: Nothing at the moment :/ I've just been rewatching shows lately. But I am planning on finally watching Arcane with a friend whenever I finish my honours application and my current work contract !

Currently consuming: If this is about media, then I'm currently watching minecraft videos from ItsMarloe lmao. I don't have time rn for a minecraft phase and his videos are sweet soooo. If this is about food, then mango :D

Currently craving: uhhh for ADHD to stop kicking my ass and let me write my lit review and finish any of my 4-5 wips

Tagging a few ppl who might be interested, and no pressure ofc. Also feel free to count me as tagging you if you want to do it: @greencheekconure27 @not-a-hawk @arya-skywalker @butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway @broodytinygaycarmilla

[hsvh-hp]

Hi! Thanks for all the responses -- I hadn't realized how many chapters I'd gotten through since your last round until I saw the emails lmao

I was wondering, in regards to this:

And omg, I totally feel you on being a trans person in the HP fandom. It's very weird how my tumblr dash is set up. I have mutuals still from old fandoms who are queer, and I feel so ostracized from them at times when they toe the line of 'anybody in the HP fandom supports JKR, you're a bad person if you're still engaging with it'. I'll spare you the essay on why I disagree with that, but oddly the safest place I feel on the internet as a trans person is in the HP fandom. Which is weird at face value, I suppose, given what JKR is doing, but we really are separate from her. I've yet to see substantial evidence that fandom, which is infamous for generating zero revenue, is floating trans peoples' demise. It's just a thought crime, I guess.

if you would, perhaps, not spare me the essay? lol

I feel the same sort of ostracization which is especially frustrating when I am in such "thought crimes are fake!" circles, and I'm interested in your perspective, if you want to give it!

Sure, I’ll offer my perspective on it! This is probably best broken down into bullet points:

1. JKR was already a billionaire before she came out as a TERF.

There is nothing in the world that will change this status. Even if every single person currently engaging with her various IPs immediately dropped them, JKR would still have a billion plus dollars to drop on anti-trans movements and whatever. A billion dollars is immensely difficult to picture. The easiest way is to think like this: if you make $50,000 a year, the equivalent of her dropping $75,000 the other day is you spending $3.75. How often do you spend 0.0075% of your income and give it any thought? JKR’s wealth is not directly tied to ‘levels of fandom engagement’.

Which leads to…

2. Boycotts don’t work.

Sorry. They don’t. Not against someone this politically powerful. If they did, the flood of people out of the HP fandom in 2020 would have had a measurable effect. What did have a measurable effect? People not going to watch the Fantastic Beast movies (because they were hot trash lmao). Not giving JKR any more money works in the sense that it cripples her future projects, but it has zero effect on what’s already in her purse.

Also, think of boycotts this way: wasn’t it hilarious watching conservatives try to boycott the Barbie movie, Nike, Bud Light, and whatever else they’ve systematically locked on to? But so then why do progressives/the left/whoever think it’s going to work the other way? Like with Hogwarts Legacy? Just don’t interact with the media, dude. And if you do, pirate it.

3. Fandom is not mainstream. I have never seen any data to substantiate that participating in a fandom directly correlates to dollars for the IP. Copyright literally prevents that from happening. To bring up to popular saying, “there is no ethical consumption under capitalism”, fandom exists outside of capitalism—for me, at least, as a fan fiction writer. This is a hobby to me. I have never seen a red cent for any of the hours of work I’ve put into my fics.

And I can probably guarantee that no one has stumbled upon Harry Potter through me, lol. They didn’t read one of my fics and go, ‘you know, I should check out what source material this is coming from’. Harry Potter is so well-known that there’s no way they came in blind.

Also, the TERF discourse is very much an online thing. I work retail irl and I’ve had conversations with customers who’ll say “you know, I really don’t get all this hubbub against trans people” but are too boomer to be anything more than tangentially aware that Harry Potter is a Thing. Like, ‘oh yeah, my kids read those books when they were coming out, but I never bothered’. One of my employees bought a set of the HP books because they were on a wicked deal at Costco, and when we were discussing it I told her that while I still enjoyed HP, I wasn’t comfortable giving JKR more money because she’s extremely transphobic and donates a lot of money to anti-trans causes. My employee was horrified and said that had she known that, she wouldn’t have bought the books. Lots of people just don’t know!

Which takes me to…

4. This type of online activism isn’t effective.

I’m talking specifically about being anti-Harry Potter or anti-JKR. Falling into those two categories does not automatically make you pro-trans. This was pretty blatantly obvious back when the books were being burned for promoting witchcraft. As far as fighting for trans peoples’ rights, screaming until you’re blue in the face about how anybody who engages with Harry Potter is a traitor and JKR BAD is wasting time better spent doing something productive - something that could actually benefit trans people rather than…I don’t know…virtue signalling that their blog or twitter account is a safe space?

5. I personally do not feel welcomed or vouched for by these people.

Listen, I’m going to break myself down into all my stupid little categories. I’m trans. Autistic. Intersex. Aromantic. Asexual. Basically, all the things that people love to try and cast out of the queer community, whether that means they’re trying to split LGBTQIA+ at the T or Q.

The anti-Harry Potter stuff, as far as attacking the fandom, feels like the latest strain of purity politics to me. As I’ve laid out above, abandoning HP will not right the wrongs of JKR in any measurable or tangible way. Boycotts don’t work. Fandom does not feed JKR’s coffers, and destroying the fandom will not cripple her. There are trans people inside the HP fandom, and what of us? Are we traitors? Are we not ‘really’ trans, because obviously we don’t care about the current political climate? Are we just confused and need to be enlightened as to what harm we’re doing? Where have I heard this rhetoric before?

One small thing, tangentially related:

6. I don’t care what JKR says about how engaging with Harry Potter tells her about who her ‘supporters’ are.

Seriously? She’s a lying dirtbag, and I’m just supposed to take her word on this? This is the one thing she just so happens to be right about?

When she started spouting TERF shit, I was really saddened by the writers who, upon leaving the fandom, also deleted their works in protest. Seeing as the majority of the HP fandom is queer, I’m sure that JKR was very pleased with the amount of queer media erasure that occurred. Why did we do that for her?

7. I believe JKR actually seethes and malds over the prospect of her fandom being queer and producing queer content.

As a writer, there’s a special kind of pain that comes from someone not quite interpreting your work the way you would have wanted them to. What do you think JKR’s first reaction was when she first learned about the Harry/Draco ship? The Draco/Hermione ship? If she didn’t live in a stone castle, I bet she would’ve punched a hole in the wall.

So, yeah. Transing and gaying all of her characters is a pretty nice way to get to her in a way that she can’t legally or financially retaliate. Every time she screams ‘WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE?!’ at the queer people in her fandom, a trans person’s crops are watered.

8. The HP setting is very welcoming to trans people.

Potions exist that can change your body. Enough said.

That the Harry Potter books never really says anything specifically about trans people (NOTE: obviously JKR’s prejudices even back then showed through, but this isn’t about that) leaves the question on the table. Obviously trans people exist in the Harry Potter setting, because they exist everywhere. So, how did they never get any page time?

Well, who says they didn’t? In a setting where potions exist to change your body, trans people are just…people. I don’t even think that they would have a marginalized identity because gender dysphoria would be something very easily treated. Think of it like someone who takes medication for blood pressure. They need the medication, it’s life-saving, and while there isn’t a magical pill to ‘cure’ high blood pressure, it can be managed. The magical world revels in being strange. Why would being trans, while being considered strange here in the ‘Muggle’ world, be anything other than normal there? Why can’t it be?

And then there are Metamorphmagi. People who can literally change themselves at will! If that isn’t a trans person’s dream, I don’t know what is. I would personally love the option of being the biggest, hairiest dude with a dick so big an erection would make me black out, and then ultra femme and delicate the next.

Last on this point, Harry never notes anyone specifically trans in the text (NOTE: touching on things like the physical descriptions of Rita Skeeter and Marge Dursley, JKR tends to do the ugly=bad person thing. Although she describes Rita and Marge as mannish in appearance, they aren’t trans characters. They’re women that JKR wants to frame as bad people. Like I said above, this is JKR’s prejudice showing through). If Harry never notes anyone as specifically trans, that probably means that it’s impossible to tell at face value. The same as blood pressure medication, to return to that analogy. How do you know someone is on them? They tell you. You see the pill bottle and happen to know what that medication is for. They complain about side effects. They complain about the symptoms that led them going to the doctor in the first place.

9. Queer HP fandom content can potentially be how a Harry Potter fan realizes that they’re queer (or that queer people are just regular folks).

Hey, the first one happened to me!

If someone comes into the Harry Potter fandom unaware of JKR’s politics - maybe they were gifted the books for their birthday or happened to catch the movies on TV - it’s good actually that this person doesn’t fall right into an echo chamber of JKR’s politics. I’ll be happily here to correct her record in a way that isn’t shaming or policing them.

Anyway, I think that’s everything lol. To summarize:

- The HP Fandom is a neutral setting. Engaging with it doesn’t help JKR, and not engaging with it doesn’t help trans people. Just don’t spend money on official HP merch.

- If you want to be a pro-trans activist or trans political ally, please just ignore JKR and put all your focus on the real world.

- There are trans people in the HP fandom who are left feeling awkward and uncomfortable due to virtue signalling.

- Generating queer HP content is good, actually.

[in-my-loki-feels]

11, 16, and 17 for the fic writer asks!

11. Link your three favorite fics right now.

I originally thought this was a request for fic recs, but all the questions in the game are about your own writing so I guess that's what it means? (Imma do both.😁)

Three favorite fics of my own right now: Beg Me For It, Let Me See You, Feelin Nauti

Three current favs by others: Kneel for Me, Rein Me In, wait for me at the bottom (a Thanzag rec for you!)

16. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?

My god, so many. At least 7, but I could be forgetting some. I don't think I've had this many ideas tumbling in my head since the AC2 days. 😆

I have one idea for the President Loki + Don AU where Loki would not only get to take on a female form, but also goes head-to-head with Don's ex-wife (which sounds way more dramatic than it is). I keep setting it aside because it feels like a lesser plot point in that AU and I'd probably be writing it to indulge myself more than others.

17. What do you do when writing becomes difficult? (maybe a lack of inspiration or writers block)

Perfect timing for this question as the wip I'm currently working on is making writing feel VERY difficult right now. If I'm totally blocked or I can't figure out what's wrong with a story/it just doesn't feel right, the first thing I should do is step away and see if the next step comes to me naturally, instead of trying to force it. However, I rarely follow that advice because I'm a clown.

The next step is to reach out for help. Either a beta reader in fandom, or my bestie whose also been my writing buddy for many, many years. No matter the fandom or subject, we can turn to each other, and since she has no emotional investment in the characters, sometimes she can see the problem more clearly.

If it's a lack of inspiration, then I usually seek out some new media to consume. One of my favorite pieces of writing advice is: if you want to be a writer, you need to read a lot and write a lot. Reading, watching a TV show or movie, or listening to new music activates my brain and usually leads to new ideas.

Thank you for the ask! <3

[ro994art]

A very specific nitpick I have with 'Megamind vs. The Doom Syndicate'

I don't do text posts here very often. This feels odd, let's just get on with it.

I was originally going to write down a full-on review expressing my utter disappointment and disgust dislike towards the horrible and cheap "sequel" to my favorite Dreamworks movie, Megamind. A sequel which, by now, we all know was nothing but a glorified extended pilot for a Peacock series that I have not watched, but it honestly looks just as mediocre, so I have no current plans to.

Hoooowever, I have since seen many reviews of this "movie", most of which have been able to express my feelings and thoughts pretty well. So it felt like I didn't have much else to contribute to the discourse.

Except for one thing that I have not seen anyone talk about (or maybe they have talked about it and I just haven't seen it), and it was one of the things that bothered me most about the film. So this post's entire purpose is to publicly point it out.

No, I'm not talking about Keiko herself (although yes, she was my least favorite character and completely ruined the movie and this franchise for me thanks for asking). It's more the purpose of her character.

You see, and allow me to put my cranky old lady pants for just a moment, I believe most people have been able to guess that the entire reason this character was put into the movie was to be a target audience insert. So the 8 to 12 year-olds watching can go "Hey! This character is around my age and has the same interest as me! I'll keep watching for her!" (Do no ask me how well that's going because I personally do not find the excecution of it all that great, but I digress). And although, as a more mature viewer and long-time follower of the franchise, this does feel a bit annoying, having this kind of character when you're trying to appeal to a new audience is, technically speaking, not a bad thing in itself. And when executed well, this can totally work.

But here's the problem.

It makes no sense for a character like this to form part of Megamind's story.

You see, my friends, for those of you who have not seen this movie (which, for your own good, I sincerely hope is the majority of people who are reading this), "Megamind vs. The Doom Syndicate" is VERY explicitly supposed to take place two days after the events of the first movie.

Just two days.

This is explicitly said at least two or three times in the first act of the movie alone (I value my sanity too much to rewatch the film to double-check that fact, but I'm fairly confident in that).

If you all remember, the masterpiece known as the original Megamind movie came out in 2010. Therefore, the most logical thing to assume is that the events of the film itself also take place in 2010, if not before that, right? It's never explicitly stated, but since there is nothing that confirms or denies this, I think it's the default assumption we as an audience should make.

Now, I did not own my first cellphone until the year 2012 when I turned 13 (don't make fun of me for that fact), so, correct me if I'm wrong. But I don't think in 2010, we were seeing thing such as:

Smartphones like the one Keiko has throughout the film,

People using said smartphones to make livestreams in which people leave likes and comments in real time,

Kids who are content creators gaining half a million subscribers in TWO LITERAL DAYS (I cannot stress this enough) by getting information and newsflashes from goodness-knows-where,

App equivalents to TikTok and Instagram with as much popularity as we saw in this,

And overall, just social media getting the same treatment and functioning the same in 2010 as it does in 2024.

I mean yes, in 2010, things such as the ones I listed above were probably beginning to take popularity and to become a thing. But they surely weren't as well-established as they're being presented to us in Megamind "2".

This cheapquel "sequel" is suppossed to be only two days after the first one, and yet, everything that revolves around THIS KID'S existence suggests to us that we're in the 2020's era of internet, influencers, and social media. Heck, the earliest I could buy any of this believably happening is like, 2018. 2015 as a stretch.

We went from 2010 to (at least) 2015 in two stinkin' days.

No sense whatsoever.

Logically speaking, there's no way TikTok Childstar Keiko was even born in the year the first Megamind took place. Like, her birth year is 2011 at the earliest, and you can't convince me otherwise. Why do you even exist two days after Megamind was renowned as the hero of Metrocity? Please go back to the womb.

(That got personal, sorry. This kid gets too much on my nerves)

"Well, TECHNICALLY since it's never stated when the first Megamind took place, nothing's stopping them from making it so that it's been 2024 all along"

If that seriously does not sound like gaslighting your audience in order to force "hip" references that resonate with the kids watching almost a decade and a half after the original film came out to you, then I don't know what does. I don't even care if "you're not suppossed to think too hard about it" (which is a lame excuse for lazy writing btw), just watching both movies back-to-back, the tonal differences and any chronological references just clash way too much for me to buy this as a legitimate follow-up taking place in the same universe, same city, and even same week.

So yes, "Megamind vs The Doom Syndicate" sucks, and the inclusion of this character and this anachronistic plotline, for me, is a huge reason why. It's insulting to the audience and a clearly desperate attempt to appeal to a new generation of kids that frankly, if Megamind had gotten a genuinely good sequel, they would've liked it all the same, even if it didn't include a 12-year-old TikTok influencer with a half-baked personality and forced role in the story. Because seriously, don't even get me STARTED on how forced her joining the gang felt, holy crap. 😓 But that's a tangent for another day. Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe I'll just leave this meme here and move on.

This was, of course, only one of many flaws this movie had, but I feel like other people have ranted enough about how the writing, character portrayals, poor animation, bad humor, and lame attempts at world-building did the original Megamind dirty.

Here's hoping one day Dreamworks wakes up, thinks smart, and decides to give us the Megamind 2 we deserve, so we can all happily toss this... project, into the realm of non-canon media, where it belongs.

[cy-cyborg]

So I sent you an ask before your tumblr got deleted and I’m assuming the ask got deleted too. Basically, when I was watching Nimona I thought Ballistar got his prosthetic too quickly after his amputation. But I don’t actually know how long it takes for an amputation to heal, or to build up the strength needed to use a prosthetic. Also I would have liked to see him learn to use his prosthetic instead of using it perfectly from the beginning. But I’m not an amputee. Are my impressions of this accurate?

Yeah, I'm really sorry about that (also that it took me a little while to answer this time too!), I'm pretty sure my answer was actually the next post in my queue 😅.

So I haven't seen Nimona (I really want to, but I don't currently have Netflix lol) so I can only answer generally, but the healing time is different depending on what you mean by healed. If you mean just the wound healing, that takes a few weeks, usually 2-4 weeks. If you mean able to wear a prosthetic, for leg amps, that's usually 6-8 weeks, but I think it might be shorter for arm amputees since they aren't weight bearing through their stumps. Im not 100% sure, though. To fully heal (the swelling in the stump goes down, general pain settles, etc) can take a year or more, but most people will be back to their normal lives long before that, though. As for building up strength to use the prosthetic, that's really variable. Some people take to their prosthetics REALLY quickly, others take a while. The type of amputation is a big factor, but lots of other little things go into it too. Ballistar is an above-elbow amputee right? As I understand it, those kinds of prosthetics are quite difficult to use, both due to the strength needed and due to them not being super intuitive.

In saying all this though, unless its a focal point of the story or its a very grounded/realistic setting, I'm personally pretty lenient with most sci-fi/fantasy in this regards. We definatly need more media - even fantasy and sci-fi that shows that side of being an amputee or at least puts in effort to acknowledge it, but I think stories that lean a bit more into the fantasy side of things have their place too, especially in stories like Nimona where the focus seems to be elsewhere. This isn't to say you shouldn't try to include the realistic rep where you can, but you have to find a balance between realism and the tone your story has. Some stories really would benefit from the more grounded/realistic depictions that show everything, others might only need a brief mention. It depends on the story, and it's really hard to say where Nimona lies on that spectrum without having actually seen it, but from the little I have seen, I feel like it falls on the "brief mention" side of things since it already has so much going on.

I'm going to use How to Train Your Dragon as an example of what I'm trying to say, just becuase I know the first movie got a lot of critisism from amputees for having hiccup literally get up and start walking the moment he woke up after loosing his leg, but I think it lands in a similar area of the spectrum I'm talking about. HTTYD is one of those movies where having the more realistic approach wouldn't have really fit with the tone or pacing, but it would have benifited from a little more than what we got. Not much though, since we kind of already got it with toothless anyway. In my opinion, all it needed was a slight tweak to that ending scene and it would have been perfect (in my opinion). Personally, I would have made Hiccup (without a prosthetic) sit on toothless's back when they went out the door for the first time. The scene plays out almost exactly the same, and you get the symbolic framing the directors wanted, while acknowledging that walking so soon after a burn amputation is not going to happen. Gobber gives Hiccup the tail, saddle and his new leg in the bundle, which allows them to keep the "That bit's my handiwork, with a little hiccup flair thrown in. Think it'll do?" line. Hiccup can instead hold the leg in his hand and say "I might make a few adjustments" - everyone laughs and then it cuts to the end scene with them all flying with the implication some time has passed the same as in the real film. It's a small tweak, but I do think that's all it really needed.

So yeah, While its great to have more realistic representation in your stories, you got to work within the tone your story has. There's no "one size fits all" way to approach it. Again though, I could be wrong about where Nimona would fall here, I know it does tackle heavy subjects in regards to trans representation and discrimination, so maybe it could have made it work. I'll probably talk more about it once I actually see the movie though!