#I'm sure it'll pass lol

[azikarue]

MayBlade 2023 : Day 19 : Tree

TyHil | FFN Rating: K+ | FFN Link ❖ Hilary knew something was off from the moment she set foot in Tyson’s front yard. The normally uplifting atmosphere had an undercurrent of tension that made everything feel way too quiet for a sunny, spring afternoon. And, when it came to Tyson, quiet wasn’t usually a good sign.

With a deep breath, Hilary followed the path to the front door, glancing surreptitiously around on her way. Nothing was visibly amiss, and she was beginning to think that maybe her intuition was wrong for once, until she walked into the dojo and Hiro said:

“Oh, good, Hilary’s here. Maybe she can talk some sense into him.”

“What?” Hilary asked to the room at large as Hiro brushed past her, evidently irritated, and out the door she’d just entered through. “What’s going on?”

“Nothin’ to get worked up about, Homegirl,” Gramps said, his eyes lighting up as they turned from Hiro’s retreating form to Hilary. He smiled at her, even though his knuckles were white from how hard he was clutching his sword. “Hiro and Tyson got into a little spat, that’s all.”

Hilary frowned. It wasn’t unheard of for Tyson and Hiro to bicker, especially after the damage their relationship took when Hiro joined BEGA behind his brother’s back, but any argument that interrupted Grampa’s training felt like more than a ‘little spat’.

“Where is Tyson?”

“Little dude’s out back,” Gramps said, nodding in that direction. They seemed to have an unspoken understanding between them that Hilary was going to go check on him, because he didn’t look at all surprised when she immediately backtracked out the front door and around to the rear of the dojo.

She found Tyson next to the koi pond. His back was to her, but he appeared to be watching the Snowbell blossoms blow in graceful arcs across the surface of the water. They’d had a few stormy nights recently, and the yard was covered in so many flowers that it looked like an actual snowfall. It was beautiful and relaxing, but there was no peace in the slump of Tyson’s shoulders.

Hilary closed the gap between them, careful not to approach too quietly and startle him, but also not wanting to disturb him.

“Hey, Hilary,” he muttered when she came to a stop at his side. He shot her a weak smile that only made her worry more.

“Are you okay?” she asked, looking him up and down curiously. He had a piece of paper clutched in his hands, blank side facing out, and the collar of his shirt was wrinkled, like his argument with his brother had gotten physical at some point.

“Did you see Hiro?” Tyson asked, answering her question with his own bitter inquiry.

Hilary nodded. Tyson wasn’t looking her way, so she also said, “Grampa said you two had an argument.”

Tyson scoffed. “It wasn’t really an argument,” he said with a scowl.

When he didn’t elaborate, Hilary probed further. “Okay? Well, is something wrong?”

Tyson’s only answer was a forlorn nod across the pond. Hilary followed his gaze and gasped.

She didn’t know how she’d missed it before, but The Grangers’ Snowbell tree was half collapsed. It looked like the wind and rain had become too much for it; one of the thickest branches had peeled away at the trunk and was dragging on the ground. Upon closer inspection, the wood inside looked almost like somebody had gouged big chunks of it out.

“Oh no!”

“Yeah,” Tyson said sullenly, staring at the tree with a frown.

The Snowbell had been a staple in his yard for longer than Hilary had known him. Judging by the size, it had probably been there for his whole life. What it had to do with Tyson and Hiro’s argument, she had no idea, but there had to be a connection. Like most things when it came to Tyson, she was going to have to be patient to find out.

“Do you think it can be saved?”

Tyson took a deep breath and let it out shakily. “No.”

“Are you sure?” she asked gently, inching closer as his brow furrowed.

“Grampa actually had an arborist come out and look at it.” He turned to her, a brief shadow of amusement flashing in his eyes before the sadness took over once again. “A tree surgeon – did you know that was a thing?”

Hilary nodded meekly.

“Of course you did.” Tyson gave a flimsy laugh and hung his head. “I guess it’s been sick and we didn’t know. They said it’s practically hollow inside and has to come down.”

“I’m sorry, Tyson.” She didn’t know what significance the tree held and it didn’t matter. What mattered was that it was significant and Tyson was hurting.

Hilary moved slowly, so he could push her away if she was overstepping, and looped her arm through his. When he didn’t protest, she leaned her head on his shoulder, as close as she could get without outright hugging him. He seemed to deflate and rested his cheek on top of her hair.

She didn’t know how long they stood like that for, quietly letting the breeze toss fallen petals over their feet and breathing in unison, before she thought she should try to lighten the mood.

“What’s that?” she asked, motioning to the paper he was holding with her free hand.

Tyson’s breath hitched and Hilary felt a momentary panic in the handful of seconds it took him to pause, then tilt it enough for her to see. Relief that he wasn’t angry with her question turned to heartache when she realized he was holding a picture.

The photograph was obviously old, but in pristine condition; she could tell Tyson took really good care of it. And it was no wonder – the photo was of a young woman sitting under the Snowbell tree holding a little boy on her lap. They had matching, brown eyes. The little boy couldn’t be more than three years-old, but she’d know him anywhere. It wasn’t hard to guess who the woman holding him was.

“Is that your mom?” she asked anyway, because every ounce of brain power she had was going toward holding back her tears.

“Yeah,” Tyson rasped. When he cleared his throat, Hilary used the sound to mask her own sniffles. “She loved that tree. We used to spend hours out here. I don’t know if I really remember or if I just look at the picture and make the memories up.”

Hilary squeezed his arm, but didn’t say anything. She could sense he wasn’t finished.

“I asked Grampa if we could get a second opinion. I think he knew right away that I’d be upset.” Tyson took another quaking breath. “Hiro kept saying that it wouldn’t make a difference, that it was rotten and had to come down. He told me I’d have to get over it. I said some things back that I shouldn’t have and it just kept getting worse.”

“Hiro doesn’t always have the most tact,” Hilary said quietly, curling her other hand around his arm, too, and pressing so close that he could probably feel her heartbeat against his elbow.

The tension in the air made sense now that she knew what had happened right before she’d shown up. She could picture Tyson and Hiro shouting at each other, Hiro grabbing Tyson’s collar, and Grampa stepping in, kendo sword in hand, to break them up. If she wasn’t so concerned about Tyson, she’d probably be livid at Hiro right now.

“I know he only lashed out because he misses her, too.” Hilary thought that was a diplomatic thing to say – and surprisingly gracious of someone that Hiro thought needed some sense talked into them – but she didn’t comment. “He doesn’t want to have it cut down either, but it’s easier for him. He remembers her more than I do, has other memories. I… Hilary, I don’t have a lot of pieces of her left.”

Tyson’s voice wavered and Hilary felt her heart break. She sniffed again, willing herself not to cry. It was difficult when she could tell Tyson was on the brink of tears himself.

Suddenly, he was pulling away.

“Tyson?” Hilary tried not to sound too worried as he extricated himself from her hold. Instead of letting her arms fall limp, she wrung her hands together to keep from reaching back out.

“Anyway,” he said, like he hadn’t heard her, “they’re cutting it down tomorrow.” With those words, he turned his back on her and headed towards the dojo.

“Do you want me to come?”

“You don’t have to.”

Hilary showed up, bright and early, the next day. Something told her that Tyson would need a friend. She couldn’t, on good conscious, stay away and wait for him to admit it.

When Gramps met her at the door, he didn’t seem surprised to see her. Hiro wasn’t home, as far as Hilary could tell, probably off dealing with any grief he felt privately. She thought that was for the best; Tyson was so keyed up that one wrong word would spark another argument.

So Hilary didn’t say much. She sat outside and watched Tyson train. Facing, stubbornly, away from the tree, he launched Dragoon over and over, too distracted to keep it spinning for longer than it took to run a single drill. For once, she didn’t scold him for it.

In the quiet break after one of Dragoon’s slalom runs, they heard a truck pull up out front.

Tyson froze and Hilary sat forward. Both of them tuned their ears to the snatches of conversation drifting back from where Grampa was greeting the tree cutters. Immediately, Tyson whipped around to take a long, desperate look at the tree, as if he regretted training with his back to it all this time. Hilary ducked her head down; it felt appropriate to give him a minute of privacy.

When the voices started getting closer, Tyson retreated to her side and pretended to be very busy with his beyblade as Hilary nodded politely to the group of men rounding the corner.

After a series of brief introductions where Grampa did most of the talking, the workers circled the pond to inspect the tree.

“They’ve been doing this a long time, T-Dawg,” Grampa said, standing over them with a soft expression. “Said they’d tell us if the last guy was wack and the tree’ll keep kickin’.”

Hardly daring to hope, Hilary watched the workers examine the tree from every possible angle, before looking over, to where she, Tyson, and his grandpa were waiting with bated breath. One of the men shook his head. The other gave a reluctant thumbs down. Hilary’s heart fell.

Gramps patted Tyson on the shoulder on his way past.

Tyson slumped against the side of the dojo and slid down to sit beside Hilary.

Grampa returned a few minutes later with two lunch plates for her and Tyson, but neither of them felt like eating. Instead, they sat on the porch, watching as the Snowbell was methodically sawed into pieces and carried to the woodshed. Hilary snuck glances at Tyson the whole time. He sat stiff as a board with empty eyes watching as the tree was cut down.

“Is it really going to be used as firewood?” Hilary asked, sadness and concern mingling in her tone.

“We might as well use it for something,” Tyson said, sounding completely downtrodden and too much like Hiro for Hilary’s taste. “There’s probably not enough wood left to do anything else with.”

Hilary didn’t answer. An awful lot of the logs they were transferring were hollow inside.

Once the tree was reduced to a stump and sawdust, Tyson got wordlessly to his feet and went inside. She didn’t see hide nor hair of him while she tidied up the dishes from the lunch they didn’t eat. She cleaned up the handful of other dishes littered around the kitchen, too, as her heartache for Tyson and her desire to do anything to make him feel better chased each other around her mind.

“You didn’t have to do that, Homegirl,” Grampa said, appearing as she dried the last dish and put it away.

“I don’t mind,” she answered honestly. “Is there anything else I can do to help?”

Gramps fixed her with a kindly smile and said, “You’ve done plenty already. That was real groovy of you, keepin’ Tyson company out there today.”

Hilary nodded.

It felt like nothing to sit with Tyson and act as a silent supporter, especially when she couldn’t possibly understand what he was feeling right now and when she knew there wasn’t anything she could do to make him feel it any less. It hurt to see him hurting. She wished, more than anything, that she could preserve even a piece of the tree and its memories for him.

Suddenly, she got an idea.

“Grampa, would it be okay if I took a piece of the wood?”

It felt like a weighty ask. Hilary held her breath and Grampa’s curious stare, until he broke into a smile, nodded, and said, “Sure thing, Homegirl.”

When she left, she left through the back yard and purposefully ignored the lonely stump beside the pond. She crossed to the woodshed and took her time examining the wood she could see, until she found a piece of a branch that was still solid and strong-looking. As she left with it in her arms, she felt better knowing that she was saving at least one piece of Tyson’s mother’s favorite tree from flames.

It was almost a week later when Hilary showed up at the dojo next, with a wrapped parcel tucked under her arm. Tyson had been dodging her calls the whole time she was gone, but she had Grampa’s word that he was doing fine and keeping busy.

She found Tyson out back again, sitting by the pond with his back resting against the remnants of the Snowbell. It was weird seeing the ground covered in petals without the tree’s lush branches fanning out against the sky. It would be even weirder next springtime, when there were none at all.

Tyson was leisurely tossing food to the koi fish and looked up when he heard her approach. “Hey, Hilary.” The smile that accompanied his words was genuine, though, she suspected, out of practice.

“Can I sit down?” she asked, keeping the pond between them in case he said no.

Tyson nodded and scooted to the side a little, so Hilary had room to lean against the stump, too. It felt almost like she was intruding on something sacred, but Tyson patted the ground next to him expectantly, so she sat down.

“How are you?” she asked, studying him carefully, fingers digging nervously into the parcel in her lap.

“I’m all right.” He shrugged and tilted the bag of fish food in her direction, an offering. Hilary reached in and took a handful. “Sorry I didn’t answer your calls.”

“It’s okay, Tyson.” She knew he needed time to grieve. No matter what Hiro said, she’d never expected Tyson to simply get over it. She couldn't imagine what it was like to lose one of the few tangible lifelines you had to memories with a deceased loved one.

She tossed the food into the pond and watched the colorful fish bob up to the surface for it. She and Tyson continued to feed them, taking turns and pointing out their favorite color patterns and making up names for the ones they could tell apart most easily. It felt like a welcome, if not slightly forced, return to normalcy.

The next time Hilary went for the bag of food, Tyson pulled it out of her reach at the last second with a mischievous grin.

“Hey!” Hilary exclaimed and made to roll onto her knees so she could climb over him for it. Luckily, she remembered the parcel before she knelt on it and sat back where she was. Tyson was watching her curiously so, before she could lose her nerve, she held it out to him and said, “I almost forgot – I got this for you.”

“Is it edible?” Tyson asked, cracking another smile as he set the fish food off to the side and took the gift.

“No.” Hilary was blushing, suddenly feeling like maybe this wasn’t a good idea, but there was no turning back now.

“Gee, Hil, I hope you kept the receipt then,” he joked. Once he ripped the paper off, he went entirely silent.

When Hilary had left with her piece of the tree she’d taken it straight to a local woodworker her parents were friendly with. Something about her breathless explanation of what she was looking for, and the confusing story she told to express why, won him over – he said he was working on other commissions, but promised to make hers a priority.

The finished product had turned out better than she imagined.

“If you don’t like it, that’s okay,” Hilary said once Tyson had been quiet for longer than she anticipated. “You don’t even have to keep it. It just seemed like such a shame to let all that wood burn. If I crossed a line, I’m sorry!”

Tyson gently ran his hand over the picture frame, tracing the delicate floral pattern that was carved into it. Hilary was happy that, seeing it in his hands, it looked like it would be a perfect fit for the photo from the other day.

“Like I said, if you don’t like it—”

Tyson cut her off by surging to his knees and yanking her into his arms. Hilary squealed, momentarily afraid that they were going to overbalance and fall into the koi pond, but Tyson had just as tight of a hold on her as he did on the picture frame.

She wrapped her arms around his ribs, surprised and startled to feel them shake with a sob.

“Thank you,” he whispered into her hair.

Hilary’s only answer was to hold him tighter.

[noireservoir]

Okay so I came in earlier to finish my 3rd attempt and yall this mess was what made my instructor pass me but I declined just bc like. This is slightly worse than my first two attempts. How did I manage to let the restart come through on my caps this time when they were clean the first two times😭 like I'm glad I almost got it but the perfectionist in me couldn't accept I gotta fix this shit stat. That and even more slag had shown up in my root, I gotta clean this up before I feel like I can officially be certified

[daz4i]

how and why is there discourse about whether or not certain queer identities exist/if people should be allowed(???) to use them. why is "people know their own identity better than you ever could, and they're the only one who get a say on what they are" such a tough concept to grasp

i think if you find yourself offended by the label someone uses (especially if they're a stranger) or think it invalidates your own, it's a good idea to look inside yourself and question why that may be. more often than not, it's a result of insecurity or uncertainty of your own identity (or many other things, but i won't make a whole list here). whatever reason it is, until you resolve it, you shouldn't take it out on people for having an identity you don't understand

many have said it before but it's worth saying over and over. infighting only helps our oppressors. conservatives don't care if you're a cis gay or a xenogender aegosexual aplatonic lesbian, they hate all of us either way. trying to fit in by going for people who are easier targets for them isn't gonna help you, it'll just alienate you from your own community, and you're never gonna please them. the momentary rush you get from hearing you're not like "one of /those/ gay people" is not worth it and is gonna do more harm in the long run, i assure you

also, it is important to me to say this, but having some less than nice kneejerk reaction caused by confusion about an identity you don't understand doesn't mean you're a bad person or anything. as long as you aren't mean to that person, and you take a second to think smth along the lines of "wait a minute, this isn't any of my business" after having said reaction, you're good 👍 a lot of reflexive reactions we have to things are ingrained into us simply by. well. living in a society 🤡 and you're not terrible for having those thoughts. it's your actions that matter, and your second thought (the "wait, why did i just think that?") is more defining of your actual character and morals than your reflex. i know that having thoughts like this, even tho they're unwanted, can very easily make one spiral, so it's important to me that whoever needs to hear this knows this doesn't make you a bad person 🙏 you're good, keep taking actions to be good, accept other people even if you don't understand them, and you're on the right track :)

[solardee]

UTEV - Drabble #1

The castle was calm and quiet, for all intents and purposes. Sure, his boys were wandering about, causing their usual mischief as they were want to do, but otherwise it was quiet.

His office was undisturbed, paperwork neatly filed away in the drawer below. Dusk’s hands were folded in front of him, hiding his mouth as he gazed emptily at the door. It would be flying open any moment now, if the telltale steps of his brother down the hall were anything to go by.

There has always been a balance to maintain, after all.

He was the Guardian of Negativity, in stark contrast to his energetic brother; it was inevitable they would conflict. Natural even. Life is not always filled with ease or joy. Disagreements, betrayals, tragedies, all find themselves at home in all of our existences.

Some, perhaps more than others, the cracks in his skull dripping corruption was testament to that.

Keeping a balance, between striving against adversity and being rightfully discouraged and grief stricken in honesty isn’t easy. An ever-lasting fight between positivity and negativity, that shows no signs of settling soon. A fight to last all of eternity.

The door slammed open in front of him. Dusk’s gaze didn’t flinch, slowly traveling up until his singular eyelight bore into shining save stars in his brother’s sockets.

“BROTHER,” Dawn hissed, the talons hidden under his glove gouging slightly into the wooden frame, “I know what you’ve done.”

“Oh, do you now?” Dusk responded, head slowly tilting to the side, the corruption pooling on the inside of his skull. His hands remained folded in front of his face.

His brother scoffed, slamming his hand onto Dusk’s desk to tower over his sibling (though it isn’t like he needed Dusk sitting down to do that) “Of course I do!” Dawn shouted indignantly, “and I won’t allow this crime to continue!”

Dusk’s unoccupied tentacle curled around his chair as he lowered his hands, the barest hint of a smirk on his apathetic face, “You won’t allow it?” he mocked. His other tentacle laid comfortably on his lap.

Dawn’s wings flared out in rage, “That pudding cup in the fridge was mine and you know it!”

Dusk shrugged, raising the aforementioned confectionery in front of his chest, but out of Dawn’s reach, “What a shame. I didn’t see your name on it…” he drawled despite Dawn’s offended huffing.

“Dusk…” his brother warned.

“If you want it so badly, come and get it.”

Thus, the fighting begun.

Feathers flying, apathy dripping to impede determined progress, what Dusk lacked in height he made up for in maneuverability. Dawn shoved and reached for the treat, even as Dusk twisted further away.

It was a good five minutes before Dawn shoved his wing into Dusk’s face and made him choke on feathers, his good arm snatching the slightly crushed cup from the distracted tentacle with a shout of victory.

‘Well,’ Dusk thought to himself as they settled down from their vicious battle, ‘There are worse ways to spend an eternity, I suppose.’

“You’re such an ass sometimes, you know that?” Dawn muttered as he sprawled in the chair across from his office desk.

“Brother, you simply give me far too much to work with,” Dusk replied simply, pulling a drawer in his desk open to grab a treat of his own.

The battle for balance paused, if only briefly.

[questionablespecies]

God, I feel like crying and nothing has happened...yet. The amount of stress that I'm carrying is the worst it's ever been in my entire life and I'm an orphan.

It's another semester down and yet, I'm not free. I have prelims to study for, which I don't even feel prepared for because we've spent 8 months not being prepped for the material, so everything being learned is essentially on the fly, but hey, at least it's multiple-choice! I fucking hate this school.

And then I have my dissertation proposal. Honestly, that is the one I'm the least concerned about. I'm really reaching levels of IDGAF anymore, pass fail whatever. Every time I talk about grad school, it's about how much I would love to quit - like the door is right there!

And it's not because it's hard, let's be real. The work is immensely easy - if anything, the same as undergrad. But the expectations are different and the school doesn't prepare you at ALL for those expectations. They just tell you hey things are happening that you gotta do, no we're not gonna tell you how to do it even though you've been in class for this long and should've had professors say something about it, that's funny, anywaaaaayyysssssss....

Like I can't even make up how disorganized this program is. They're not building us to be professionals; they're building us to be administration. I shouldn't have to constantly keep double checking admin about when this will be cleared on my grade when I've already sent xyz documentation months ago. They act like they just started yesterday, yet the tea is that all grad school is disorganized like this. When if you ask my old boomer aunt, she'll categorize it as "breeding out the weak."

It's ridiculous that the people who work here don't even know what's going on either, and you can feel the lack of support permeating the air. But they'll do events to act like they give a shit about us while essentially robbing us blind because idk where my tuition is going because it certainly isn't going into adequate professors or administration.

I pray to GOD that I better pass everything in one neat bow because I could soooooo easily see myself doing something else. So fucking easily. This isn't a dream job for me, this is something I like and one thing about ME is that I AM A QUITTER. I will leave due to a slight inconvenience, IRDGAF.

I don't have anyone to disappoint other than myself, and I know I'll get over it.

[spokelseskladden]

i should get an award for not having ten mental breakdowns these past two days, im truly the king of mental health

[angeltism]

...? one time lollite lost her streak and was given the option to do 6 consecutive lessons to recover it. i wonder why that option wouldn't be available to you (genuine). (for additional context; we're on our sister's family plan. shrugs.) -🔦

I think there was some kind of pop up when I opened the app but I was too frantically clicking to see what it was . . . . And also I think it was a "pay [amount] of gems to fix uur streak" thing which I'd be too broke for anyways if that was what it wasn't trying to suggest TwT,, but I'll manage ! This is luckily only the first time ever it's been fully broken , so I'll manage even if it currently sucks in the moment . . . . :'3

[paperclipninja]

I'm gonna sound very old person yells at cloud but I don't care, I feel like I need to say this. We all (well most of us) know that messaging Neil with any headcanons/theories/wishes/hopes/dreams to do with the show is a no-go because it could potentially compromise the story he wants to tell or ends up telling. And yes, he is a grown up who chooses what to respond to etc and I think it's wonderful he engages with fans and answers a lot of lovely and interesting questions about his process, writing and journey etc.

However, there is another reason not to send theories and ideas about how the show should go to the show creator in the hope of a response: it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter whether a theory is correct, or a speculation may or may not play out. That is why fandom exists.

Online fandom is where we all come together to yell and cry and throw around weird-ass ideas and theories and look at art and read fanfic and unite in our love of characters and a show. A huge part of being in fandom, is the way fandom theories become like an understood little bit of fanon lore that some people attach to, others disregard. But it doesn't matter. And part of the fun of fandom, is when a new season or a new episode of the show comes out, you have this collective catalogue of ideas and theories and headcanons and you get to yell and scream, "omg it happened1" or "lol that that thing was ever talked about" or "thank god that theory didn't come to pass".

Wanting to know now (not that we ever will) and not wanting to wait until the next season to find out the answers diminishes the fandom experience. I cannot stress enough how much we are in the absolute peak of the fandom experience right now. The between seasons time is the ultimate time to be a part of a fandom (as I'm sure many people are well aware), knowing there's another season coming energises everyone to create and connect and speculate and it's glorious! I know it feels like it'll be like this forever, but it won't. Next season is the last and yes, there will be a flurry and uptick of all the energy and excitement once again, and I absolutely believe Good Omens fandom will live on and remain active and thrumming. But there won't be theories and what ifs and hunting for clues for the next season, and over time it will dwindle a little and plateau and some people will fall into other fandoms, and while it will probably bubble away, there won't be the anticipation that sits with us now.

My point is, fandom is where we get to throw around ideas and flail and be ridiculous and also serious sometimes, but it's all for us. For the fans. Showing Neil theories or getting in a flap about a particular speculation and asking if x, y, or z might happen isn't just about putting the creator in an awkward spot, it takes away what fandom is about. Just let this time be ours. If you haven't been in fandom before, enjoy it! Don't be in a hurry to seek definitive answers or know things either way.

It doesn't matter if any or none or all of the things that float around end up being correct or incorrect. Fandom isn't about being right. It's about being a part of a community and being able to share ideas and it's about it being FUN.

So TL;DR Stop sending Neil fan ideas because that is for fandom, not for the creator.

[sebscore]

heyy! Got a request! So all the drivers are in this fancy yacht in Monaco promoting F1/race. It's black tie event. Our fem! F1 driver comes in wearing gorgeous dress. And I just want everyone's reaction. I think it will be interesting since the fem! F1 driver usually is in F1 overalls/merch. Thank you!

MISS LITTLE BLACK DRESS

pairing: (most of the) f1 grid x reader (including some retired drivers)

warnings: mentions of the fia. a drunk nando at the end lol.

author's note: thank you so much for the request! this was genuinely so fun to write, i'm sorry that i didn't include the entire grid, but for some people i just genuinely didn't know how they would react or i didn't want the reactions to become repetitive. let me know what you thought of it! 💖

• • • • • • •

''Who's that?'' Lando asked Charles and Charlotte, his eyes not leaving the backside of the woman who had just entered the yacht. The question caught the attention of the other people seated on the long couch. George, Carmen, Alex, Lily, Pierre, Yuki, Carlos and Isa followed Lando's eyes.

It was quite hard to recognize her since her face wasn't visible as she talked to Toto, Mattia and Susie. ''Maybe someone from the FIA or something?'' George concluded, taking a wild guess.

''I love her dress, it's so cute.'' Lily whispered to Carmen, admiring the way it hugged the woman's body perfectly. ''I know, it's sexy, but also elegant in a way.''

''Lando, you should go up to her.'' Pierre encouraged him, taking in the way the Brit was eyeing her up and down.

Alex and Charles agreed. ''Yeah, make it a bit fun for us here! This event isn't gonna get any better than this.'' Alex said, the black-tie event was organized by the FIA and those guys weren't exactly known for their fun parties.

''You sure?'' Lando hesitated, the man was newly single and it had been a while since he had approached someone in that kind of a manner. The group cheered him on, wanting to see their friend take some action and move on from his previous relationship. ''What do I even say?''

The question was more directed at the women. ''Compliment her dress, Lando.'' Isa advised him, knowing she would appreciate it. He nodded at her words, repeating the words in his head.

''Yeah, okay- anything else?'' He asked them.

''Just let the conversation flow from there, it'll be okay.'' Carmen assured the younger guy, seeing how he started to get nervous.

Lando got up from his seat, breathing in and out. ''Here we go.'' He took a swig from his beer for some encouragement and made his way over while the rest of the group watched in anticipation.

''Hi, everyone.'' He greeted the team principals and Susie with a smile, before his eyes fell on the reason he was there. The smile was smacked from his face and was replaced by an expression of disbelief.

''Y/N?''

''Hey, Lando.'' She greeted him back, taking notice of his face that she had a hard time reading. ''What's up?''

The McLaren driver was stunned. The woman was Y/N, he had been checking out the woman he had known since the two of them were kids. In his defense, a long time had passed when he last saw her in anything that wasn't oversized or racing related.

''Nothing, just, uh, wanted to come and say hi,'' he managed to stutter out, ''the rest of us are sitting here, if you'd like to join us.'' He motioned towards the entire group that sat with open mouths as Y/N turned around. They quickly covered their surprise up and waved at her, sending her uneasy smiles.

The unaware driver smiled back at them. ''Yeah, I'll join you guys in a minute.'' She wrapped up the conversation with him, growing uncomfortable with Lando's unsubtle stare.

''Great, see you all later.''

Lando quickly bid them goodbye and was ready to crawl into a hole, feeling humiliated and confused all at the same time. He sat back down on his original spot, avoiding eye-contact with everyone.

''That's Y/N? You were gonna flirt with Y/N.'' Carlos stated in disbelief himself, that he hadn't recognized her before. ''That's crazy.''

''I've never seen her like that, she looks good!'' Charlotte was impressed the way the woman could pull off her duality like that, she looked completely different than she did when Charlotte ran into her on the paddock.

The rest of the girls agreed. ''I'm gonna ask her where she got that dress from, I need that in my closet.'' Lily couldn't stop thinking about the little black dress the woman was wearing.

Meanwhile, the boys watched Lando in amusement as he went through all the five stages of grief. ''Lando, man… I'm sorry, I guess.'' Pierre chuckled, covering his huge grin with his hand.

''Yeah, better luck next time.'' Alex said, trying to not burst out laughing at the situation.

Yuki just observed everyone in confusion, not understanding the big fuss they were making about this. ''Lando, you like Y/N?'' The Japanese man had to start paying more attention to the conversation instead of munching on all the appetizers that were spread out on the table in front of them.

''No, Yuki! I didn't know it was her.'' He exclaimed, getting defensive about the entire thing.

The Alpha Tauri driver simply nodded, not caring much either way.

''I think you guys would be cute, a childhood friends to lovers kinda thing.'' Lily teased, trying to make him feel better about it.

Well, she failed. ''No! She's like- Ugh, just no!'' Lando didn't even want to think about it, him and Y/N was just… no.

''You're getting weirdly defensive about this, Lando.'' Charles teasingly noted.

''And you DNF'd this weekend, we all have our problems.''

''Is that Y/N? Oh, look at her.'' The woman caught the eyes of Sebastian, Lewis, Jenson, Mark and Vallterri. She must have sensed their eyes on her as she turned around and made her way over to them, a big smile on her face.

They made some space so she could sit in-between Seb and Jenson. ''We were starting to wonder where you were, our party animal.'' Jenson teased her. The female driver was quite known for never passing the oppurtunity to celebrate something.

''I've been here for a while actually, but Rosberg caught me when I was ordering something at the bar and well- you know when Nico starts talking.'' She explained her absence, recalling the man going on about whatever Nico Rosberg goes on about.

The five men chuckled, knowing how the man could get. ''That Britney, never gets old.''

''I almost didn't recognize you without the usual racing suit.'' Lewis noted, he had to take several looks before being sure that it was in fact her.

Y/N glanced down at her dress. ''Yeah, I was actually gonna go to a club with my friends, but then my team told me this was kinda mandatory, so that sucked.''

''I think we all would rather be at a club right now.'' Mark said, sighing loudly. A party on a yacht was really hard to make boring, but the FIA had obviously done their best to just do that.

''I just came for the free alcohol.'' Vallterri spoke up for the first time, having everyone agree with him.

The conversation split up from there. Jenson and Mark teasing each other about things they had said on live air, and the former Mercedes teammates catching up with each other.

That left Y/N and Seb, the latter nudging her shoulder. ''You look really pretty, Y/N.'' She was touched by the genuineness in his voice. ''Thanks, Seb.''

''Hey, Y/N.'' She moved around and saw a pretty drunk Fernando approaching them. ''Your dress is a bop or whatever you call it.''

''No, Nando… that's not- oh whatever, thank you!''

[bigcats-birds-and-books]

UPDATE!: I HAVE MADE IT TO AND THROUGH THE “SEPARATE FRONTS AND BACK” STEP, AND NO CASUALTIES WERE SUSTAINED!!! please witness: The Lower Part Of My Cardigan!!!

i did 13 pattern repeats instead of the recommended 11 to get to this point because i am Tol, and now i’m working up the back panel! i’ve bound off the back underarm bits, and the front panels are just. chilling. on some scrap yarn. while i get the back to the right height.

then allegedly i’ll go back for the front panels, and then do some sorcery called Three Needle Bind Off at the top, which i’ve never done before but i’m looking forward to!! this has been a wild project on the construction front, and i’m stoked to see how it turns into A Garment With None Seaming by the end!!

girl help i'm pining after making another cardigan again..,.,.,.

[baronessvonglitter]

Law of Attraction ~ Chapter 7

Rom Com AU divorce lawyer!Dave York x fem!Reader (featuring private investigator!Tim Rockford)

Word count: 6,209

Summary: A friendship reaches a new level, Dave gets the truth about Carol, and a misunderstanding brings two people closer than they've ever been..

WARNINGS: 18+ Only! Explicit for smut. Fluff. One adorable dog. Mentions of food/eating, alcohol/drinking. Fingering. Oral (f&m receiving). Infidelity (but a certain someone was unfaithful first so.. Uno reverse?) More marital strife (sorry). Porn-shaming. A lovers' misunderstanding. Angst. Unprotected piv. (please lmk if I've missed anything)

Author’s note: This is where they finally hook up. Wave. Of. Relief. Also, the whole Tim scene was really just me thinking about that old show Cheaters. It really scarred me for future relationships lol.

Series Masterlist

Common sense tells you to stay away from Dave while the investigation is going on. He's vulnerable now, and as your attraction grows stronger with each passing day, you know it'll soon be impossible to hold back from the natural predilection for being close with him.

In short, you're not so sure you can keep your hands to yourself when you're around him.

On a sunny weekend you meet at a pet adoption agency and, true to your word, you choose a dog together, a beagle named Maple, and the first time you bring her home, Dave stays for almost the rest of the day, helping set up what she needs and playing with her. There's a light in his eyes as he spends time with your new pet, a gleam that you haven't seen before, and it touches your heart.

He's invited to come over anytime he wants just to spend time with her, and he happily takes you up on the offer, indulging in more late night dinners and movies. Maple's a good chaperone, much too cute to ignore, and she keeps you from lingering on the sinful thoughts you're having about each other. For the time being, anyway.

You become a great means of support to Dave, a lifeline, and in that commisseration of your wrecked marriages, you find not just solace but a profound closeness. You spend every lunch hour together, at your cafe or at his office, sharing meals and talking about your day. No subject is too mundane or too trivial to insitgate conversation about a million other things, discussions that Javier would easily get bored of, and that Carol would dismiss as silly.

In a white floral print dress that's intentionally too short and too tight to fully button up, you visit Dave on your lunch break, bringing homemade soup and sandwiches, knowing he has a busy day ahead with meetings and court dates, and wanting him to have some comfort food in the midst of it all.

Despite his feelings for you, he likes to remain above reproach. Your visits are never secret, and when you're in his office his blinds are open. Nothing inappropriate passes between you anyway. Your looks and your words are the most intimate things that you share, at least since the heated kiss not so long ago. (Even if anyone gives a second thought to your visits, most of Dave's coworkers and their spouses hate Carol and would keep mum just to spite her.)

Still, you look like the sweetest sin, and under his desk Dave has to shift to accommodate his growing hard-on, eyes feasting on the playful lift of your brow, the curve of your smiling lips, the graceful column of your neck and the bountiful billow of your breasts, practically on display. He knows it's just for him. Spending so much time, you don't have room for any other guy.

"Are you listening?" you giggle, your bubbling laughter doing not-so-innocent things to Dave's dick.

"Yeah. Of course I'm listening. And yes, we're still on for tonight. Carol's already said she's doing a girls' night with some of the women from the hospital."

"I can't wait," you smile. "It's so good to spend time with you and the girls. I wish.."

"Wish what?" he whispers, his hand reaching out for yours.

"It's selfish, but I wish it could always be this way. When I think about my life before you, it's a blank. I don't know how I managed to stay sane, but when I'm with you I feel.. alive. I don't want to know what it's like to not have you in my life."

Dave pulls your hand across the table, bringing it to his lips to plant a soft sweet kiss on the back. "Baby, you don't know how much that means to me. It's like I'm drowning, and then I talk to you and suddenly I have air again. You're the only thing worth staying above water for."

"I think we're saving each other from drowning," you tell him.

Dave walks you out, insisting as usual to escort you back across the street, and this time when you step into the elevator, there's a charge in the air, a new tension both of you know has always been inevitable.

The close, cramped space of the elevator, you in that dress, curves begging to be caressed, your sweet floral perfume beckoning him closer. There are no words exchanged as you share a look, communicating everything in that prolonged glance. He's thankful no one else is on, and his heart leaps right before he presses the STOP button.

You press him to the wall in a kiss full of longing, aching for his taste, for the feel of his tongue against yours. Your panties are sopping wet within seconds as his hands find their way under your dress, his large hands smoothing over your skin as your own fingers find their way under his jacket, hungering to feel his muscles and the heat of his skin under your palms. You settle for the cotton of his light blue button-up.

"We should stop," you tell him, pushing your panties to the side as his fingers slide between your warm thighs.

"Yeah, we should." He teases your folds, relishing in the sighs and tremors that go through you at his delicate touch.

"You're married," you remind him, a gasp leaving you as he pumps not one but two thick fingers inside your drenched pussy. Dave's head drops down, trying to contain himself, willing himself not to come in his pants then and there. Never felt anything so fucking wet in my life..

"A married man whose wife is fucking someone else," he says,a lawyer even when he's hot and hard for you. "I want you to come for me, baby. I need to know what you sound like, what you look like, what you taste like when you come." He pumps slow and steady, fingers scissoring to feel all of you, and imagine how well you'd take him if he could fuck you right now. "You're so fucking wet, I know you need to come, baby."

You grasp his wrist, feeling the strength behind his skillful touch as you greedily take every plunge of his fingers, crying his name in a shudder as his thumb swipes your clit.

"Keep your eyes on me, baby," he utters, giving your bottom lip a soft bite. "I want to see your eyes when you come."

Unable to speak, you nod, your high-pitched gasps and moans letting him know you're close. He crooks his fingers, too caught up in the surreality of the moment to even think about teasing you or edging you the way he fantasizes about. "That's it, isn't it?" he smiles as he takes a moment to bury his face in your neck, inhaling your scent, his fingers finding that spot deep inside that is your undoing. You're squirming under his touch now, desperate.

"It's all you, baby, come for me," he whispers, holding your chin up so your eyes meet his. And as if they're magic words, you come apart under his touch, clamping down on his fingers, earning a deep, satisfied grunt from him. Just when you think one wave is over, another starts, his fingers continuing their blessed work inside your cunt.

"Sweet girl," he murmurs as you finally push him away, overstimulated, eyes glassy in fucked out bliss, some loose strands of hair caught in your lip gloss. He removes his fingers gently, your glaze sticky on them. With his eyes on you he licks off your essence, closing his eyes briefly at the taste of you, just as he'd imagined.

After, he makes sure you're okay, cleans you up with his handkerchief from his jacket, wishing he could wear the heavenly scent of your pussy on him all day, but he'll switch it out for a new one later.

"I'm not ready to go yet," you murmur, stopping him from pressing the elevator button.

Before he realizes what's happening, you're on your knees in front of him, fingers deftly working at undoing his belt buckle. He doesn't make a move to stop you. No man in his right mind, married or not, would deny you anything. "Here, baby," he says, handing you his jacket to give you cushion for your knees. He runs his fingers through your hair, heart pounding madly in his chest as you look up at him with those irresistible eyes, releasing his cock from its confines.

Thank you Jesus, I knew it, I fucking knew it! You glory in the big fucking dick that you always knew Dave was packing down there. Your mouth pools with saliva as you give him a couple teasing strokes, marveling at the swollen shaft, curved, ringed with smaller veins and one large one running along the top. He tips his head back against the wall, breathing heavily as you give little kitten licks across the head, scooping up his trickling precum.

Carol can have this every day and she chooses not to. What the hell is wrong with her? A victorious little smirk curls the corners of your mouth as you drag your tongue along the underside, your free hand gently palming his balls, feeling their heft in your hand. Just thinking about how much he's going to unload makes your cunt clench in anticipation.

"Stop.. teasing.." he begs, looking as if he's close already. "Not fair.."

"Good point," you tell him, unable to keep back a smile. You move the shoulders of your dress down, pushing it over your breasts and bringing your bra down as well, baring your breasts to him. Practically drooling at the sight, Dave fondles one in his large palm, his thumb rubbing avariciously over your nipple, bringing it to a tight little bud.

At last you take him in your mouth, hollowing out your cheeks as you slurp the first couple of inches, adding pressure by stiffening your tongue. One hand rests on his base against his neatly trimmed pubes, the other on his thigh, hard muscle and soft hair under your palm.

Taking him in as far as your throat allows, you alternate between using your mouth and your hand, spitting on his shaft to add lubrication, watching him innocently from below as Dave loses control little by little. His hands tangle in your hair, thumbs caressing your cheeks as you gag on him, pulling away and leaving a stringy mess of saliva between your lips and his cock.

Poor Dave hasn't been blown in ages.. I'm so lucky to be the one to give him this.. You use your fist and mouth in tandem, bobbing your head as your fist works the base, keeping your eyes on him as he tries desperately to hold back.

Giving his balls a little massage, you hear him groan and feel him shiver. Keeping your mouth suctioned to his cock, he cries out in relief as he pulses and shoots his load down your throat.

By the time you reach the ground floor you both look like nothing ever happened, not even a hair out of place nor a button fastened wrong. As you part ways in front of the bakery/bookstore you exchange a small, secret smile, with the promise of more stolen moments to come.

Dave almost regrets having to go home, but Molly and Alice are the only bright spots there, and he brings them a couple of brand new Squishmallows, loving the light in their eyes as they greet him home. They don't know that you're coming over later, just in case they accidentally spill the beans to their mom. So far they think of you as a babysitter who's also their dad's friend.

After dinner, Carol's quiet, like a ghost hating the place she haunts she goes about cleaning up the table, putting things in the dishwasher, putting an extra load of laundry in the wash, rejecting Dave's offers of help. This is something he'll be yelled at about later. It's nothing new.

He's counting down the minutes until she leaves and you can come over. He texts you some ideas of movies to watch with the kids, maybe more Disney classics, or even the older greats like E.T, The Princess Bride, Matilda, or Jumanji.

But when Carol sees him smiling at his phone, a light blush on his face because he's recalling the passionate encounter between you two in the elevator, her face sours.

"I think you need to get help. You have a porn addiction," she frowns at him.

He's too happy to argue back. "Yeah, sure, maybe."

She makes a sound of disgust. "I don't know what a man your age still watches that stuff for."

Again he makes no answer, choosing instead to cold-shoulder her anger, hoping she'll just complain her anger away while he texts you, in between reading work emails. Waiting for a quiet moment in her muttering, he asks, "So, how was work?"

"It was long.. and hard," she says, putting laundry away in the dresser.

Dave's knuckles grow white with holding back from telling her everything he knows she's done. Playing pretend has never been so damn difficult. He swallows the bile that dares to rise in his throat when he thinks how she's played him. "I bet. Sounds rough."

A little sigh from her, and when he glances up he swears he sees a little pink on her cheeks in her reflection in the vanity mirror. "It was pretty rough," she says lightly.

His eyes narrow and he can practically feel the blood pulsing through his body. How can she be so callous, so uncaring about the risks she's taking? Does she know how she's just stringing him along?

"I can imagine," he replies, voice tight.

Carol must sense his sarcasm, because she turns in her seat to glare at him. "You don't know what it's like for me. The long hours, the responsibility, the lives I hold in the palm of my hand."

He nearly snorts in laughter. "No, you're right, Carol. I don't know what any of that is like. All I do is go to the office and joke around with the guys, fuck the paralegals, and come home to a cold bed, spend my money on webcam girls, then go to sleep, only to start it all over in the morning. With you as the occasional guest star," he rants.

"You're outrageous," she mutters, slicking on some lip balm. "I don't have time for this. I'm going out."

To see Joel Dave finishes her sentence, hands fisted at his side as he tries to control his breathing. Only his wife can make him so hotheaded, so willing to damn everything to hell over a snide comment.

"You don't have time for what?" he repeats. "To talk to me?"

"What's there to talk about? We stopped talking and fucking a long time ago." She's in the closet putting on a silk blouse and looking for shoes to go with it.

"You always use work as an excuse. You do it deliberately to avoid being here at all!"

"I had a life before I met you! Excuse me for trying to find a little fulfillment apart from you and the girls. You don't define me!"

That comment stings. Dave hasn't realized until now how big a part of his life Carol's been, and how much of his youth he spent building a life she would love. Now here she is dumping all over it.

"I never wanted to define you. I just wanted to make you happy," he says quietly.

His sincerity does nothing for her. "Do you want a fucking parade?"

"You know what? A parade would be great because at least I'd be getting some attention. I-"

He's cut off as Carol grabs him and kisses him. Taken off guard, Dave freezes, his body unable to react to her lips on his. Finally he puts his hands on her shoulders and gently pushes her away, breaking the contact and stepping back. "What are you doing?"

"Don't you want to?" she asks, looking almost hurt. She comes close again and presses the flat of her palm against his crotch then takes it away as if she's burned herself. "You're not even hard."

The blood rushes back to his cock as he recalls the way your lips wrapped around him, tongue laving him as your beautiful eyes gazed up so innocently. Of course he's not hard when you drained every drop of him earlier.

"Of course I'm not," he says, turning away so she can't see the longing in his eyes, the obvious bulge when he does start to get hard again thinking about you in that elevator. "Do you expect me to be in the mood when we're arguing?"

"You used to tear my clothes off after every argument. Or have you forgotten?"

He remembers well the passion of their youth. Carol had always been feisty and tempestuous and that excited him before. Their arguments, no matter the subject, typically led to a passionate embrace. And now.. perhaps time has reshaped them.

"Will you at least lay down with me?" Carol's request comes as a surprise, given how demure she sounds. He looks at her, resting on her side of the bed, and he almost feels guilty for his earlier transgression with you. But he knows Carol has done worse, and likely has been for a long time.

But he's been with her this long out of habit, or maybe it's because she knows how to play him, and only recently stopped the game, tossing her cards aside and abandoning the rules when that stupid plumber came around.

What Dave can't resist is a little peace around the house, an interim white flag. And that particular white flag is in the form of laying next to his wife, watching her fall asleep as her eyes flutter shut.

You return to Dave's house, still under the impression that you're going to hang out, maybe make some dinner with the kids while Carol's gone. There are two cars in the driveway this time, and as you make your way to the door you wonder how to introduce yourself if Carol's actually here.

The girls let you in, hugging your legs as you come inside. Heart brimming over, you ruffle their hair, placing soft kisses on the tops of their heads.

"Mommy and Daddy are asleep," they tell you, bringing you to the half-open door of the master bedroom.

You're unprepared for the stab of jealousy as you see husband and wife resting peacefully, holding hands in their slumber.

Has he forgiven her? Has she somehow wormed her way back into his heart? Maybe he's loved her all this time and is willing to overlook her discretions, just as you secretly forgave Javier's for so many years. Maybe neither of you have any backbone when it comes to letting people walk all over you. Maybe it's a secret kink.

You can only control your own choices, and as soon as you sit alone in your car, you let the silence engulf you before you pull up the application for the culinary program in Paris, quickly entering your info before applying, sealing your fate.

Dave wakes before Carol, rubbing his eyes and stretching. It's nearly ten p.m. and he checks his phone, jolting up when he realizes he never texted you not to come over. The fight with Carol and the tenuous white flag raised between them had come so suddenly that he'd not given thought to the night in he promised you.

He gets out of bed, careful not to wake his wife. As soon as he leaves the room the girls are on him, telling him you came by but had already left. Dave quickly shuts the door as quietly as he can, to stop Carol from hearing them. He takes them out of the hallway and questions them.

"She told us not to wake you up," Molly says.

"Did she say anything else?" Dave's heart is in his throat.

"She told us to be good and that you and Mommy love us," Alice answers. "Can she come over every day?"

"She was crying," Molly added.

That's a twist of the knife already in his heart. He imagines how it must have been for you, walking in and seeing him with his wife, probably assuming the worst.

"Did she say where she was going?" he asks.

"No," they answer, already bored with the questions. "Can we go spend the night at Michelle's?"

"No, honey, it's very late," he says, heart skipping a beat when his phone buzzes with an incoming call.

Tim.

With an ache in his gut, throat constricted, he answered, somehow able to speak. "This is David," he answers, quickly moving out onto the patio to take the call.

"Mr. York, this is Rockford. Do you have time to come in tomorrow so I can discuss my findings." The PI is pretty blunt, just what Dave needs to get out of the cloud of confusion he's in.

"Tomorrow? Can't you just tell me now?" The thought of having to wait another twelve hours is excruciating.

"That's not the way I like to do things, Mr. York. But if this is an ASAP kind of thing you can drop by my office." He gives the address which Dave quickly makes a mental note of.

Of course Carol makes a face when he tells her he has to go into work. A necessary lie, but he takes note of how much she seems to dislike having to stay home. He wonders if she misses Joel, if she even loves him. That's a thought he tries not to entertain for too long or it'll drive him crazy.

The PI's office is in a small room overhead a Korean grocery shop downtown. As Dave traverses the the entrance via the back alley and up a couple flights of stairs, he gets the notion that he's in a 1930s film noir, complete with dingy hallway with wooden paneling, and a door advertising Tim's services as a PI, the signage somewhat faded on the frosted glass. Dave expects the surly former cop to show up in a trenchcoat and a Trilby, but the man appears in the doorway, a loosened tie and white shirt, gray slacks. Tim looks ready to call it a day.

He offers Dave a drink, to which Dave firstly declines, then decides better of it. If he's offering alcohol, it's probably bad news. He thanks Tim for the proffered bourbon and fortifies himself with a sip as they get situated at Tim's desk.

"As you well know, you've paid me to keep tabs on your wife, one Carol Marie York, forty-four years of age, and have surveiled her comings and goings these past few weeks. This is what I've found."

He pulls out a manila folder from an accordion file index and presents it to Dave. "About eighty percent of the time she's not actually at work, as she gives you reason to believe. The other twenty percent she's definitely at the hospital, keeping herself shut away in her office. No visitors during those times."

There's a sinking feeling in Dave's stomach and he feels all the blood rush from head. He doesn't touch the folder, as if it'll burn him. "And the 'eighty percent' as you say? What's she actually doing? Seeing this.. Joel idiot?"

"I've identified her companion as one Joel Richard Miller, fifty years of age, a plumber with a company that services Mercy Memorial, the hospital where Carol works."

Dave leans back in his chair, his grip on his glass of bourbon growing tighter. "That must be how they met.."

"They are not seen together at the hospital," Tim continues. "Their typical MO is to meet at the Starlight Motel, less than an hour from here." He takes the folder and leafs through the info. There are photos of Carol and Joel meeting up in separate cars, going into the same room, smiling, kissing, holding each other while they think they're not being watched.

"I have photos and audio, if you want further evidence."

"Audio??"

Tim shrugs. "Just between us, I have a friend on the force who lends me better equipment for high profile cases such as yours. It's not always easy to get pictures through the windows."

"What.. what's on the audio?" Dave asks, almost timidly. He knows the ascertainment of such evidence by such means is toggling some very blurry lines of legality, but for once in his life he's not going to play by the rules. Forty five years of being good has earned him some legroom to forgo his typically heroic beliefs.

Another sigh from Tim. "You can listen for yourself, or I can tell you: they're definitely fucking."

"Oh, god." Dave puts his glass down on the desk and holds his head in his hands. Tim, used to such reactions, goes around his desk and gives his client a strong pat on the back.

"I'm never happy to pass on news like this," he comforts Dave. "But you have a right to know. You're not the first man whose wife stepped out on him. What you do with this information is completely up to you." He passes the brokenhearted man a box of tissues, letting him have his moment.

"Tell me more about this Joel guy." Dave's voice is strained.

"He's single, lives alone on the east side of town. Worked in the home services industry for almost thirty years. He's big. Strong. I'd say ex-football player."

Of course. Joel was the opposite of Dave, in almost every way. Maybe that's the kind of man Carol needs. Or maybe she's just slumming. Now faced with more questions than answers, Dave slams back the rest of his bourbon, all his senses buzzing.

"I don't usually do this," he says, coming back around his desk to face his client head on. "But you seem like a good guy. If you want, we can catch them in the act."

"How?"

Tim relays the evidence, the patterns of their meeting nights and times, the place already established. Dave doesn't know how he'd not been able to see the signs right in front of him. The late nights all matched up at the same hours, on the same nights, with rare exceptions.

"If all goes according to plan, they'll meet up tomorrow night at the motel. You can be there to catch them in the act, and I'll be there to make sure nothing happens that shouldn't."

It doesn't take a lawyer's imagination to think of every possible result from him catching Carol and Joel red-handed. It would be satisfying, despite the evidence Tim has gathered. He needs to confront them in person, demand answers. Maybe Joel doesn't even know Carol's married. Worse, maybe he knows and just doesn't care.

"Let's do it," Dave agrees.

After leaving Dave's, you drove straight to work, throwing yourself into doing some work after hours, handling the invoices and filling out supply orders ahead of schedule. Anything to keep you from thinking about what you saw. Soon you found your office too confining, and started moving packages to the front, refilling display cases and restocking shelves, making room for new books. Anything to keep you distracted.

A knock at the glass door snaps you from your spell and you see Dave, peering in, waving to you. With a knot in your gut you go and open the door.

"Hey," you say quietly once he's inside.

"Hey," he says back, stuffing his hands in his pocket, unsure what to do with them.

"What are you doing here?"

"I came to see you.. to talk. I went by your place but your sister said you were here."

"She wanted to get away from my parents for a bit, and keep Maple company."

"Good.. that's good." Dave nods.

"You could have called. You didn't need to come over."

"I wanted to see you." A ghost of a smile passes his lips, warming you a little.

"I saw you with Carol," you mutter. "In your bed.. it looked like you'd forgiven her."

A shard of guilt pierces him. "I know.. the girls told me. I am so sorry, baby." He makes a move to reach out for you but pauses. "Please.. look at me."

You reluctantly bring your eyes to his, brimming over with tears. He takes your hand, rubbing your knuckles with his thumb. "I promise you, it wasn't what it looked like." He could kick himself for saying such a cliche thing. You've probably heard it over and over from Javier.

"Do you still love her?"

The question hits him like a kick in the stomach, and his immediate instinct is to say no, that he doesn't love Carol at all, and he wouldn't be going through all this if he did. But that's far too black and white, too easy of an explanation. And he doesn't want to lie to you.

"It's complicated," he mumbles.

You don't say anything for a long while, leaving him tense and worried.

"She's the mother of my children, and the first woman I was ever serious about. We fought last night," he continued, "and then I guess we just had no more fight left in us." He sighs. "I just came back from Rockford's office. She's having an affair with that plumber."

"I'm sorry," you tell him. "I'll send some condolence cookies to your office." You turn to go, torn between wanting to comfort him and needing to turn him away.

It's too tempting right now to start an argument, all your pent up passion needing to be externalized. "My own divorce wasn't nearly as messy as this situation is. I don't love my ex-husband. There's nothing complicated about it."

"Will you listen to me?" he goes after you, grabbing your hand and turning you to face him. "Yes, it's complicated with Carol. It always has been. The only uncomplicated part about my life is you!"

Now the tears fall freely. "Dave, I can't risk my heart getting involved any further. I have to protect it." You wipe your face with the heel of your hand, makeup smudged but you could care less. "You deserve more than being a cuckold. I would never do to you what she did. If I had you in my bed every night I'd have no need of satisfaction elsewhere."

That thought sets him ablaze, the memory of you on your knees in that cramped elevator, your tight wet mouth wrapped around him.. he could have that every night if he could leave Carol so easily.

"I know you wouldn't.. because you actually care about me."

"No, Dave. I fucking love you." Realizing what you just said is a jolt to your system, but you continue. "Please don't choose the woman who betrayed you over the woman who's madly in love with you."

He takes a breath and cups your cheek, gazing into your eyes as he speaks. There's a vulnerability in his voice. "Do you really mean that?"

Your feelings are laid bare, your heart open to him and there's nothing more frightening or more exhilarating. "Dave, I shouldn't have said-"

He shakes his head, silencing you with a firm but gentle touch. "Please, just let me say this. The fact is, I'd choose you. If if came down to it and I had to choose, there would be no contest. I'd choose you. Every damn time."

Your lips meet his in a crashing kiss, alighting both of you with need. Hands on your hips he presses you to the nearest flat surface, a large wooden bookshelf. Dave's kisses travel down your jaw, your neck, and he rips open the top buttons of your dress to get to the swell of your pretty breasts, pressing messy kisses and love bites on your supple skin.

"I need you," you moan, "right now." Your desire is growing out of control.

"God.. I need you too," he says breathlessly. He unbuttons his jeans, quickly pulling down what he needs to, while you hurriedly remove your panties. He grabs your thigh, hooks your leg around him as he presses the tip of him to your dewy folds, teasing you until you're squirming with need.

"This okay?" His breath is hot against your ear. "I don't have a condom. I can pull out.."

You shake your head. Even if you weren't on birth control you'd want to feel him in every way, want that glorious pump of his seed filling you. "It's okay, I'm good, I want it."

He eagerly lines himself up. "You're dripping already.. fuck, I don't think I can hold back.." He slides into you, slowly, savoring this moment he knows he'll look back on for years to come. "I love you," he moans, unable to help the last snap of his hips that delivers his full length into you. He's surrounded by you, warm and tight and oh so wet. "I wanted to be inside you when I said that," he confesses, thrusting home again, filling you deeply.

"Dave," you moan, looping your arms around his neck as he thrusts at a languid pace, shivering from keeping himself at bay. He's a stretch to fit, but he keeps his thumb on your clit, working in small circles as he fills you.

"Please, fuck me," you beg, nails digging into the nape of his neck as you break from a sloppy, delicious kiss. "We waited too long for this.. fuck me now and make love to me later."

He shakes his head, the pleasure already creeping up into his balls. "Gonna come if I don't stop now." He picks you up and carries you to the nearest sofa, both of you giggling as he tries to walk with his pants down around his ankles.

He places you on the sofa, legs spread apart for him as he settles himself beneath you, raising the hem of your dress over your hips. Hooking your legs under his arms he brings you to the edge of the cushion and places small, teasing kisses along the insides of your thighs, groaning as you run your fingers through his hair.

Dave looks at you like you're a miracle, breath warm on your soft skin, tongue dipping out to taste you. He'd had a taste earlier when he licked your cream off his fingers, but there's nothing like drinking from the source. "I love you," he rasps, saying it after planting each kiss upon your thigh, until he reaches his destination, blowing soft cool air on your clit.

"Dave," you groan again, hips eager for him to press forward.

"Payback," he reminds you how you teased him in the elevator almost twelve hours before.

"Mmm.. punish me as you see fit.."

He takes his time once he's there, languidly licking a stripe up your center, delighting in your sweet little moan as his tongue swipes over your clit. His tongue delves into your folds as if to memorize your shape and your taste. You sigh when he pays attention to one side, and your entire body tenses when he laps along the other. When he fucks you with his tongue the handsome curve of his nose rubs against your clit until you're a shivering mess beneath him, your essence all over his face.

Waiting until you're just on the edge, he pulls back, using his fingers just as before, knowing what it will take to get you to come all over his hand. He pulls the most beautiful moans from you, such symphonic sighs as you scream his name. And the cherry on top is when he purses his lips around your taut little clit and sucks as his fingers curl inside you, making you moan louder than he's ever heard anyone as you coat his face with your juices.

He's inside you again, your warmth clasping around him as if he belongs there, in your perfect pussy, buried deeply as he pistons his hips against yours, the culmination of every fantasy he's ever stored up about you now becoming real as you buck your hips up beneath him, demanding all of him, taking every inch because you're made just for him.

True to his word, he fucks you, makes you his in every way. There's nothing so perfect as the feeling of you coming on his cock, squeezing him and urging on his own climax. Once again ensuring that you want him to, he comes hard, painting your sweet cunt with his spend until it's spilling out of you while he's still inside. There's no doubt when you're screaming his name and it's ringing throughout the empty bookstore, you belong to each other and always have.

"Are you okay?" he asks sometime later when you've both caught your breath, holding onto each other for dear life.

"I'm wonderful," you answer, body still thrumming with pleasure, a lightness in your heart that nothing else has ever produced.

dividers by @strangergraphics 👑

taglist: @penascigarette @joelalorian @la-vie-est-une-fleur29

@darkheartgatita @speaktothehandpeasants @rav3n-pascal22

@vickie5446 @mrs-pedro-pascal @zascal @sunnytuliptime

@mysticsuitcasealmondwombat @joelmillerisapunk @almostfoxglove

@itwasntimethatdidit40 @604to647 @milla-frenchy

@everybodylovedcontractors @misstokyo7love @ppascalq

(sorry it's a little later than I promised!)

[thankskenpenders]

Happy new year, everyone! Welcome to 2024, the year that will mark the 10th anniversary of Thanks Ken Penders. I'd like to go over my plans for the blog for this year.

First of all: in the very near future, I'll have a post with my thoughts on Sonic Dream Team, and I'm sure I'll write one last Sonic Prime review once the final episodes drop on the 11th. I've also been sitting on an unfinished piece about the Sonic LEGO sets. I wanted this to be longer and more detailed piece that not only reviewed the sets but also went into the weird disconnect between homogenized image of Sonic the Brand and the actual fiction it's based off of, but it'll probably end up getting cut down a lot just so I can put something out. Let's just say I did a fun little thing with one of the sets.

Second: yes, I would like to return to regular TKP updates this year. As I've said many times, I wanted to do this in 2023, but I've been suffering from creative burnout after finishing SLARPG and have generally been unable to focus on any of my creative goals this past year. I'm hoping that this year will be better and I'll be able to get back into the swing of covering Archie Sonic issues. Even doing one issue every week or so would be vastly preferable to continuing the hiatus. I'm still only halfway done!! But aside from burnout, my other main hurdle is that I need to reread my own archive to refresh myself on all these things after nearly three years away. This will take some time.

The thing is, though, this year I'll have an extra incentive to go back through my previous writing and brush up on all things Archie Sonic. Because you see...

I've decided that I want to make a video essay about Penders. The comics, the copyright battle, The Lara-Su Chronicles, everything.

The why

I've thought about doing this before, but I never committed to the idea. I was too busy with gamedev, or I thought it'd end up being too long, or I figured that there were already enough videos on the subject, or I just lacked confidence in my ability to put together a video essay. So I told myself it wasn't meant to be, and let the multiple YouTubers who have cited me as a source on their own Penders videos fill that void.

Recently, though, a few things have happened that have convinced me it might be time. For one, YouTube video essays/media retrospectives/etc. are just getting longer and longer. When Quinton Reviews is out here doing 21 hours of videos on Sam & Cat, a subpar Nick sitcom that only lasted one season, I don't feel so crazy for wanting to make a video about several hundred comic books and two lawsuits that'd be at least an hour or two long lmao. Admittedly, I've also been self-conscious about doing a long video essay like this as a trans woman who has yet to do any vocal training. But these days I feel like I see a lot more transfem YouTubers who have done little to no vocal training, and that's given me more confidence on that front.

But the big one was Hbomberguy's recent plagiarism video. As I sat there watching it, I kept thinking about the time I found a CBR article that was just a crude 800 word summary of my two previous articles on Penders, published by a CBR writer who's put out over 4000 articles since 2019. If I've already been plagiarized before, and my writing is so frequently passed around as a go-to source on Archie Sonic drama, then I wouldn't be shocked if there were YouTubers out there straight up just plagiarizing me. I don't watch other peoples' videos on Archie Sonic, so I'd never know! So if people are just gonna paraphrase me when covering these topics anyway, why not take matters into my own hands and make what I would consider to be the definitive video on the subject? If hacks like James Somerton and iilluminaughtii can churn out these shitty video essays and people will still watch them, surely it can't be that impossible to make my own, right? (And also, uh, Hbomb literally told me I should make the video lol. If you're reading this, thanks for the encouragement.)

The what, how, and when

So here's the plan.

Part of this video essay will be an adaptation of my Medium article on the recurring themes of Ken's Archie Sonic run, with its content touched up and expanded upon. There were a few things I skimmed over in the article because I didn't want it to get too long, but again, people are out here watching ten hour videos about bad Nickelodeon sitcoms now. I can get away with elaborating a little more. I can add a few paragraphs talking about the Chaos Knuckles arc, or throw in a little more historical context I've discovered in the years since.

After covering the comics, the back half(-ish?) of the video will be dedicated to the copyright battles and their ensuing controversies, trying to give an accurate picture of what actually went down, the sheer scale of how bad Archie fucked up, and what our takeaways should be. This will have some similarities to my New York Magazine article on the subject, but I'll be rewriting it from scratch. I REALLY had to keep things short for that article because I was already way over the expected word count, and my tone was a little more straight-laced than normal because I was trying to keep things Professional. I can riff more and insert more of my own opinions this time, like I normally would.

I'll inevitably have to touch on some of Ken's Bad Tweets when discussing things that have happened after the lawsuits, but I don't want the video to just devolve into a list of times people got mad at him on Twitter, so I'm gonna try to keep that to a minimum in favor of focusing on his actual work. Things like the Scourge the Speed Demon incident and his continued statements on certain characters' copyright statuses probably warrant mentioning, though. And finally, assuming that the book really does come out this summer, I would like the grand finale of the video to be about those first couple chapters of The Lara-Su Chronicles.

I don't currently know when this video will get done, but it'll probably be in the back half of the year, especially with me waiting for the book to either drop or get delayed yet again. But I've actually already started writing a bit of the script, and will keep chipping away at it for a while.

So, uh, yeah, look forward to that? Wish me luck?

[justwinginglife]

Hello!! Hope you are doing well and are having a good day ❤️ Can you maybe do a fic with Narumi (Preferably if you do write for him) or Hoshina where he is together with a reader who faints quite a lot of times and still neglects her health. Hoshina or Narumi is like very very overprotective not yandere type but too sweet boyfriend type. Really want to read a long fic with oh so sweet kaiju no 8 boyfriend . Please do delete this if you don't like it..

Also thanks so much for being so kind and sweet. I love your fics so muchh. The way you write is so wonderful and super enjoyable to read. Do make sure to take care of yourself and not overwork:D

Hello again! @totallybakedcake I hope all your school things turned out well! If not, it'll get better <3 Also thanks so much for the compliments omg! I'm a happy woman :) Hope you have the BEST of days, I will 100% write this for you, Narumi and all. I hope this was a long enough fic, it felt very long writing it lol. There is also mentions of a mature scene but no explicit detail.

Falling For You

The day you met Gen Narumi, you quite literally fell for him. 

The familiar, dizzying pull of gravity had suddenly taken hold of you, and -accepting your fate, as you had all the times before- you aimed your fall towards a nearby bench. When you pleasantly landed in his arms instead, your senses snapped to attention. You were suddenly very aware of his warmth, of his scent, of your lack of breath in the face of his allure. 

When he finally spoke, you thought you might bottle up the sound of his voice and save it for a rainy day. “Woah there. Maybe let’s not take a spill in the middle of the sidewalk, yeah?” 

You simply nodded. You hadn’t yet figured out how to conjure up your thanks, your words seemingly frozen in your throat. 

He searched your face for a moment, his gorgeous eyes unraveling you with every second that passed. “Are you feeling sick or something? Need anything?”

You shook your head.

“Okay… well, I need to get to work. Can I trust you to not bash your head open on the concrete if I leave?”

You nodded again. Apparently head movements were all you were capable of at the moment. 

He looked you over once more and then sighed before reluctantly walking away. Your heart pounded in your chest when he looked back at you, not once but twice, before disappearing into the distance. 

Then your phone beeped and you realized you had to get to work too. It was your first day and you couldn’t be late. You took off in the direction he went in and you wondered if maybe you’d see him on the way. You wondered if maybe you’d have the strength to actually thank him if you saw him again. You wondered if you’d ever see him again, or if that one moment was all you had to cling to. 

You may have underestimated fate because the moment you reported to your superior for your first day of work, you realized it was him and you nearly swallowed your own tongue. 

He looked up from his computer and his eyes almost bulged out of his head when he realized who you were. He looked from the report on his desk to you, then back to the report. “This is you? You’re my new officer??” 

You nodded meekly. “Yes, sir. I am.”

He sighed heavily, rubbing his temples like you were giving him a headache. “This fainting spell of yours. One time thing?”

You swallowed. It was more than enough of an answer for him. 

He groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Great. So I’ve got a walking catastrophe at my door.”

You winced. His demeanor was completely different than it had been mere moments ago. You wondered if he had an evil twin or something. “I-I promise, I’ll be useful.”

His eyes narrowed. “You’ll be useful? Do you mean useful in getting my squadron killed trying to look after you? I don’t have the time or the patience for weaklings and I certainly don’t want them in my division.”

Suddenly your earlier timidity dissipated, now replaced with a raging fire. “With all due respect, Captain, I’m not a weakling in the slightest. And I’ve never had trouble with fainting on the battlefield before. I’ve never had trouble with anything on the battlefield before. You can look at my report again, as many times as you want, you can ask any division I’ve worked with, watch drone coverage of any battle I’ve won, as many times as it takes to convince you, but at the end of the day, I’m a valuable asset and you need me.” You met his gaze with steel of your own, daring his eyes to look away from you, daring him to underestimate your skill again. 

He stared at you for a moment. His fingers drummed over the report on his desk, the report that he’d already gone over extensively, the report that confirmed every one of your bold statements. Gen Narumi was infamous for slacking off, for running away from meetings, for dodging his mound of paperwork, but he would never let anyone onto his team without doing his research. There was too much to lose if he let an amateur run wild on his turf. Everyone in the Defense Force knew that if you wanted into the First Division, you went through Narumi. There was no chance in hell you’d be allowed in if he didn’t think you belonged there. After examining the resolve on your face, he spoke, “We’ll see about that. I’m putting you at the back for now, and if I think for even a second that you’re not cut out for this, that you’re wasting my time, I will bench you. I’ll more than bench you- I’ll end your career so fast, you won’t have time to blink let alone beg.”

You stood up straighter, saluting him. “Yes, sir. I won’t let you down, I swear. You’ll be nothing short of impressed.”

He nodded. “Good. I’m expecting nothing but the best from you after all that big talk of yours.” Then he cleared his throat. “And maybe let’s keep this fainting thing between the two of us, yeah? I don’t want anyone to know I let someone so feeble into my division.”

You bit your lip to keep from sassing your superior again. “Yes, sir.”

And with that, your second meeting with Gen Narumi came to its conclusion. 

It only took a couple weeks for the Captain to finally acknowledge you, having kept your promise to be of tremendous use to him. When you first followed the First Division into battle, even knowing your track record, he’d thought your skills a fluke. But over the next several weeks, you’d shown time and time again that your power was a result of vigorous training and combat experience, and he couldn’t ignore what an asset you were any longer.

He called you to his side on your next mission. You somehow had the nerve to tease him about giving you a promotion, but he’d snorted and said you were lucky to be on the front lines at all. When you completely obliterated the Honju before he could even pull out his bayonet, he almost considered making you Platoon Leader right then and there. But he was concerned about your… issue.

The next day, you’d woken up earlier than usual to enjoy some peace and quiet and Narumi hounded you while you were pouring yourself a cup of coffee. “So is it like a carsickness kinda thing? Only not in a car?”

You didn’t even turn to look at him. “Wow, not even a ‘good morning’ from you, Captain?”

He shrugged and snagged the pitcher from your hands, pouring himself a cup as well. “Just tryna narrow down the cause of your spells, that’s all. Can’t help being curious.”

You sighed as you stirred your cream into your coffee. “It’s not an issue, Captain. You should know by now it’s not an issue.”

He examined you as he took a sip of his drink. “Not out there, no. But in here? In here, I have to be careful you don’t drown yourself in the bath cuz you passed out, or conk out on the counter cuz you felt ill,” He moved to place a hand over the pointed edge, half teasing and half serious. 

You bit your lip to keep from smiling as you took a seat at a nearby table. “So what I’m hearing is, you think about me in the bath?”

He snorted. “Hardly. I’d just hate to have my favorite errand girl six feet under.” He slid into the chair next to you, slurping his coffee loudly.

“Ahh, so you admit I’m your favorite.” You teased, nudging him with your arm. 

He scoffed. “But you’re not my favorite. You’re just… I don’t know what you are. You’re something. Real pain in my ass.” 

“Yeah, well, it’d help if you stopped worrying about me so much.”

He crossed his arms and huffed. “I’m not worried, I just don’t want this to reflect badly on me, that’s all.” 

You peered at him thoughtfully, trying to read his expression. “Okay. So let’s make a deal then. I’ll let you know anytime I feel poorly, and you stop harassing me about it. We’ll just let what happens happen.”

His eyes searched yours, trying to find some semblance of insincerity. Then, deciding he was satisfied with this arrangement, he stuck his hand out for you to shake. “Fine. Deal.”

You shook it and went back to enjoying your coffee beside him in silence. 

Both of you made the decision to form this pact together, but you weren’t sure Narumi fully understood just how frequently you’d be calling on him after this.

Your next episode was the very same day you’d made the deal. Just a couple hours after you’d finished having your coffee together, you were out running laps when you started to feel lightheaded. You called him and by the time he made it out to you, you had collapsed on the track. Luckily, everyone was still inside eating breakfast, and no one had seen your fall. 

You woke up to him hovering over you, hand on your forehead, as he repeatedly called your name. 

When he saw you blink awake, he sighed with relief. “Fucking hell, you’re a mess, you know that?” He gave you shit but you could tell by the way beads of sweat had collected down his face and neck, by the way his breaths heaved heavily in his chest, that he was worried about you.

You had to laugh at that. Captain of Japan’s strongest division, and he was more worried than you were. 

He glared at you. “Why are you laughing, what’s so funny about this?”

You shrugged. “Happens all the time. It’s no big deal.”

He groaned and collapsed on the ground beside you. “You’re telling me, I’m gonna be running myself ragged looking after you? What am I, your babysitter?”

You poked him in the arm, smirking. “Hey, you signed up for this.”

He sighed. “Yeah, yeah. You’re right, you don’t have to look so fucking smug about it.” Then he was quiet for a moment. “Hey… I think maybe I should… be around you more. So I’m not too far away if something happens.” He swallowed as though the sudden intimacy of his request was too shameful to bear speaking aloud. But he knew he had to. He couldn’t keep running all over base to find you, what if you didn’t call him in time and collapsed in front of a moving truck? 

You thought about it for a moment. You’d never had someone actively caring for you like this before. It was a nice change of pace. Even if that someone was your annoying Captain. And even then, he wasn’t all bad. He seemed to you like he was only rough on the outside, but you felt you were one step away from breaking down those walls of his. You wondered what the view on the other side of those walls would look like. So you agreed. 

Soon, you were doing everything together. You were taking walks together, training together, going to movies together, having meals together. It was hard for people not to think you were dating. Though, Narumi was frequently putting down any rumors of the sort, saying he was just trying to make sure his investment in you wasn’t a waste. He did end up promoting you to Platoon Leader. He had no qualms about it considering you had more than proven yourself capable and worthy of the position, and now he could keep a closer watch over you.

He was more attentive than you thought he’d be. He’d noticed you never drank water enough and when he’d encouraged -practically forced- you to start drinking more, you fainted slightly less. He’d started cooking you home cooked meals in case your diet of junk food and frozen meals were the culprit for your spells. He’d even started sending you to bed early so he could be sure you were well rested. Of course, he never took credit for being so kind. He’d simply say he couldn’t stand to see you looking so shriveled up so you had to take a sip of his water. Or he’d say the junk food was making you sloppy, so you had to try his food instead. Or he’d say the bags under your eyes were too pitiful a sight to see, so you just had to retire for the night. And when you’d say to him every time, “It’s okay Narumi, I know you secretly care. Thanks, Narumi,” with the sweetest smile he’d ever seen, he thought he felt his heart soften a little more each time. 

Eventually, things changed between the two of you, when you did, in fact, almost drown in the bath. 

“Didn’t I fucking call it? Didn’t I say you might do this one day? You need to be more careful, damnit.” Narumi muttered, sitting on the bathroom floor and averting his eyes while he held out a towel for you. 

“Gen…” You cooed.

He blushed when you called him by his first name for the first time. “Yeah, what is it?” He grumbled. 

“You can look, you know. It’s just me.”

The shade of red dug even deeper into his cheeks. “I’m not… I’m not gonna look. Just hurry up and get dressed.”

“And what if I wanted you to look?” You pulled yourself up from the water and kneeled in front of him. 

He met your gaze for the first time all night. “And why… why would you want that?”

“Because I like you, Gen.”

He couldn’t stand the way you purred his name like it was meant to sit pretty on your lips. He couldn’t stand the sight of you naked, dripping wet, waiting for his response, waiting for him to like you back. He couldn’t stand the way he felt every time he was around you, the way his heart felt like it might burst, the way he worried when you had another spell, the way he relaxed when you were okay, when you were beside him, when you were nobody’s but his. And he couldn’t stand that he hadn’t kissed you yet.

So he took you on the bathroom floor and you discovered there were other reasons to be breathless, other reasons to be dizzy, other reasons to be lightheaded, that were significantly more pleasurable. And you decided that you’d sacrifice your breath to him every time, with no hesitation, just to get a taste of his lips again and again. 

When you finally started dating, it was to no one’s surprise. The entire First Division had already thought you were dating; they were more shocked that you were only now making it official. 

When you finally started dating, everything and nothing changed all at once. You still talked with him, still walked with him, but now you talked late into the night, huddled under the sheets with him naked, now you walked with his arm around your waist, pulling you closer whenever you’d stray too far for his comfort. You still ate with him, still drank with him, but now you were sharing meals, sharing drinks. You did everything together that you’d always done, but now his love made itself known to you in every second of every day, in every breath he inhaled, in every breath he exhaled, in every word he uttered, in every touch he savored, in every moment in your presence. 

He loved you so immensely, so emphatically, so infinitely, that you thought the only way one could ever be truly loved was to be loved by Gen Narumi. 

When you’d stay late and overwork yourself again -completely by accident, you knew he’d scold you otherwise- he’d throw you over his shoulder and carry you to bed. When you’d forget to eat, he’d force feed you food until he was satisfied. He’d care for you even when you forgot to care for yourself. Especially when you forgot to take care of yourself.

And when he’d examine you thoroughly after battles to make sure you weren’t hiding any injuries from him, when he’d admonish you for being reckless even though he himself was reckless, when he’d check your pulse, check your temperature, check your oxygen levels, when he thought you might be even the least bit under the weather, you knew his overbearance was nothing more than love at its purest. 

Eventually, you had less and less fainting spells with each and every day that passed, after being so thoroughly and wonderfully cared for by him, and when you did feel the occasional dizziness consume you again, he was always right there beside you, waiting for you to come back to him. 

You’d always wondered what the view would be like once his walls came crumbling down, and the sight of his heart laid bare for you made the wait worth it. And it was all yours, he never let you forget that.

And when he finally proposed to you, murmuring, “So I can care for you always,” you simply smiled at him, accepted the ring, and said “You already do, baby, you already do.”

[moonsaver]

Good day moon! Okay I normally don't do asks when it comes to yandere cause it's not my usual thing but seeing the last post you made of Yan!Sunday and his darling, that one where he just desperately wants to have that normalcy in their relationship but couldn't ever have it because of what he's done, made me think of something rather angsty; like how the darling's backlashes against his affections would probably go turn for the worst as time passes on, they don't hate him in a sense because he's really trying hard to not make them hate him and they can see that his love is real (just really fucked up) but that deep urge to hurt the person who took their freedom away is still there, it wouldn't just go away just because he loves them so much that he wouldn't dare to break them. Oh that satisfaction on seeing Sunday looking so hurt after yelling at him, they know it doesn't make them any better than him but at that point, what else is there for them to lose? Maybe in hurting him so subtly, they may find some pity in themselves for him to actually give him some semblance of love but until then, all Sunday ever receives from them are either silent treatment or backlash

Such relationship could only thrive in the worst way possible and maybe Sunday knows that but even then, he still holds out that little (delusional) hope that maybe his darling will still love him someday

Sorry for the rant, it's just that I feel for Sunday but his method will never work and it'll just deeply hurt him and his darling in the end asgfjgsfg also if it's alright, I'd request this but I'll leave it to you with how you write it, be it an imagine or anything else since I'm fine with it!

- Elys

Hello Elys! Im so sorry it took a long time for me to get to your request lol, tons of things got in the way but I remembered this request for a while.

In any case, I feel you've summed it up quite well!

Sunday isn't harsh or as brutal as I imagine him. Unlike my [i have to self advertise here, sorry HAHA] soft yan!blade, Sunday most likely wouldn't even need a bit of working around to be a softer yandere.

He's so loving, it's painful. His love is like despaired poetry for a lover who is still alive, just further than their reach. I imagine his love to be very tender, even as a yandere, if he doesn't become even softer.

And it's hard to convince him he's wrong – mainly because he already knows. But rather that's a bit distorted in his view; instead he thinks it's a wrongdoing against your nature as someone who wants to be free, but correct in the context of the situation rather than actually understanding it is absolutely wrong in general. And he doesn't budge. He's stubborn, almost infuriatingly. And instead of getting angry, I imagine he rather looks disappointed or disgruntled, which somehow does more damage/strikes more fear than anger.

And it's still heartbreaking; frustratingly for both of you, not just yourself.

You lash out, you scream, cry, wail, argue, relentlessly push and resist against him. it's your only way of getting back at him, you're sure as hell you're going to strike the hardest that way. And you relish the hurt you see in the eyes of your captor, but something more sympathetic tugs at you when you see his lovingly sad eyes. It's this cacophony of guilt, frustration, anger, and utter despair at the loss of your freedom. Sunday feels all of it, aswell, and you want to be relieved that he does – if it weren't for the fact he still wasn't letting you go.

He continually withholds your freedom from you. That single injustice to you is enough to weather your patience over time – your anger only burns hotter and hotter, pushing away any semblance of sympathy or reasoning, and it only hurts Sunday more, until you realise what you're doing, and quietly give in to sooth him for the time being. Just a little. Until that little injustice starts bothering you again. It's a toxic cycle.

And it hurts even more when Sunday tries to find normalcy in your relationship; he's trying so hard to be your lover, to hold you gently and bathe you with care, to dry you off and still love you after seeing you bare. He wants to come home and see you smile, be happy, elated that he's there, just as he feels when he sees you. But that's not what happens. His delusions and flimsy expectations are shattered the moment he steps into the dimly lit room, your form refusing to even look at him. The silence is strangely stronger than his hopes.

Anyways, that's all i can think of at the moment. I love angst yandere sunday time.

[inbarfink]

So the AA Fandom has no shortage of jokes about how our favorite Anime Laywers generally prioritize stuff like the Power of Friendship above more mundane concerns like 'getting paid for doing their job' but...seriously now, how often do they actually get paid for lawyering?

Well, welcome to...

The Big Overview of WAA Lawyers and Actually Getting Paid!!

The vast majority of AA Cases do not discuss payments for legal services explictly, so I will be Ranking how probable I feel it is the Lawyers got Paid. With a 0 standing for 'explictly and unambigiously did not get paid' and 1 standing for 'explictly and unambigiously did get paid'

The First Turnabout

That's an easy one, it is actually explicitly mentioned that no, Larry did not pay Phoenix for his services as a Lawyer.

And so, my first trial came to a close. Larry slapped me on the back and said, "Gee, Nick, it's good to have friends!" But I'm pretty sure he's not going to pay us. Unless you count the clock he gave Mia.

Which is brought up again months later during 'Turnabout Goodbyes'

Butz: Whoa… Nick. S-so, is that why you helped me out for free? Phoenix: Uh… yes. I helped you because I believed in you. (Except I don't remember saying I'd do it for free…)

So Phoenix expected and wanted to get paid, but he’s just, like, not assertive enough to get his money off Larry. And thus a long legacy of Not Getting Money was born!

Probability of Getting Paid: 0

Turnabout Sisters

Okay, so the subject of money does not come up directly in ‘Turnabout Sisters’ but like… Maya does not seem to have a lot of liquid funds on her at this point. For most of the games she generally relays on Phoenix to pay for things for her. At best right now she is semi-dependent on Morgan for cash - and considering her motivations, she probably came out with some excuse like ‘oooh Mystic Maya must prove her independence in such a dire situation or something, the whole Fey Family is broke we can’t afford to give you any more money I feel so bad ooooh’.

So I think if Phoenix got paid for defending her that was mostly a token symbolic gesture of gratitude more than actually anything that’ll help him pay the rent. And obviously Phoenix wouldn’t gain anything if he paid himself for that second trial of the case lol

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.1

Turnabout Samurai

Okay, so this is the first case where I think it is more likely than not Phoenix Actually Got Paid. There’s nothing textual, but I think with the implications of Phoenix starting the case fretting over how to pay the rent:

Phoenix: A month has passed since my trial. Mia's murder was the talk of the town for some time… But no one paid any attention to the Wright & Co. Law Offices… How am I going to pay the rent this month? Maya: It'll be okay. I'm sure some big client is just around the corner! Phoenix: Hmph.

And THEN his new Client is Will Powers who is:

a fairly sucessful actor whose life and career seems to be unglamorous but financially stable.

the first cilent Phoenix has who isn't a friend, a relative-of-a-friend or Literally Himself

generally just a really nice and wholesome guy.

It seems pretty likely to me that Phoenix and Maya got paid for this one!

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.8

Turnabout Goodbyes

OKAY so, I've seen folks say that Phoenix would've probably done this for free cause he sees this whole thing as repaying a debt for Being Nice to Him in Fourth Grade because as we all know, Phoenix is a Certified Ridiculous Human Being.

Phoenix: This is my chance to finally pay you back. Maya: Pay him back…? Edgeworth: Pay me back? For what? I don't remember ever doing anything for you. Phoenix: Never mind… I guess you don't really need to know.

Buuuuut... Larry at the time was also part of that Class Trial Bestie Pact and Phoenix did expect him to pay I mean Larry is not the Love of His Life but still.

And more important, this case ALSO established that Miles has a problem expressing gratitude and overcompensate using financial gifts.

Phoenix: Thank you. Oh, wait! Umm… I was wondering, how much is bail going to be? Gumshoe: Don't worry about that. Mr. Edgeworth is posting the whole amount. Phoenix: What? Edgeworth…? Gumshoe: Didn't I tell you? He's grateful to her for what she did. Alright, pal. Well don't forget to go pick her up, okay? Phoenix: (Hmm… Maybe I can get Edgeworth to pay this month's rent, too…)

So I feel, like, regardless of what Phoenix wanted - at the end of this trial - Miles IS going to make sure he is GETTING PAID. Dude was probably shoving checks into his mailbox like a full month after the trial concluded.

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.9

Rise from the Ashes

So... the person who initially hires Phoenix to the case is Ema Skye, a 16 year old girl whose main funds are her allowance. And Phoenix was kinda willfully ignoring his financial situation at the start and only took this case for sentimental reasons. (just more evidence that Miles was STILL sending him payments for 'Goodbyes' lol)

It's been two months since Maya left the office… Two months without a single trial. I've had offers… But none I took. That is… until the day that girl showed up.

However he does get 'formally requested' by her probably-well-off-considering-prosecutors-in-this-series older sister shortly thereafter.

Lana: … Mr. Wright? Phoenix: Y-yes? Lana: I believe our discussion here is ended. The rest… I leave to you. Phoenix: …! Um… you mean, you're requesting my services as your defense? Lana: Don't lose any sleep over it. Your client has confessed, after all. The case is over. Phoenix: Right… I'll do what I can to get to the bottom of this. Lana: …

And after a very long and harrowing journey of being in-conflict with his own client, Lana did end up being very grateful for what he did. And again, this case espacially emphasizes that 'prosecutors make the big bucks' - so she had both the means and will to pay him.

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.6

The Lost Turnabout

Alrighty, so, Maggey is generally a nice girl and also a fangirl of Phoenix Wright and that gives her an incentive to support him financially...

Actually, I really love to watch court proceedings, and I always root for you to win! When I'm off duty, I like to come here and…

But with how unlucky she is, that might imply that she could have Money Troubles. Although on the other hand she at least has a stable job at the moment... But on the other OTHER hand she does mention how all the other lawyers 'laughed her off'

Just when I thought all hope was lost; when all the other lawyers had laughed me off… "Leave it to me!" you said! You! The one and only Phoenix Wright came to save the day! And just like that, I was moved to tears, sir! I'll never forget what you're doing for me, EVER!

Which usually I wouldn't note as a financial thing. Usually when an AA Defendant is like 'oooh I have no one else to turn too, all the other lawyers turned me down......" this is because the case is considered too impossible to win or Unbearably Wacky (or some sort of conspiracy like with Maya in 'Sisters'). But, like, this is a Tutorial Case. Phoenix won that one with Fucking Amnesia. The 'impossibility' of the case was not the issue, so, yeah, it might legitimately be the money?

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.4

Reunion, and Turnabout

It's Maya Murder Trial Time Again! Pretty much the same as before with the two added factors being:

Maya is now officially employed in the Wright & Co. Law Offices during the duration of the trial.

AFTER the Trial, when Morgan is like, in jail - Maya might have a bit more acess to her family funds. Although they are established to Not Be Doing Well Financially in general....

A piece of cloth with a ton of finely-written characters jammed onto it. Probably esoteric knowledge only mediums should know. …Hmm, let's see… Here's one in English… It says… "100 Ways to Save Money". … Being a medium sounds like a rough way of life…

I think all in all these kinda even out to the same Chances of Getting Paid at last time??

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.1

Turnabout Big Top

So if you ever start discussing how pointless the AA 'middle cases' are - just remember this one crucial detail; they are the most reliable way Phoenix Wright gets food on his plate! We once again have a stranger (that Phoenix won't feel obligated to defend for free) that is very explictly Fabulously Wealthy.

He's not as nicey-nice as Will Powers is but I feel like paying Phoenix's legal fees is not something Max will bet an eye at.

Phoenix: It's a table for guests… There are some papers scattered on top. Maya: Ah! Look at this! Max's salary is written on this piece of paper. YIKES! Phoenix: W-What is it? Maya: I didn't know a magician… This salary is incredible! Phoenix: (She looks like she's about ready to pass out from shock…) How much is it!? How much is it!? T-T-THAT MUCH!? Maya: Incredible, huh? Phoenix: You can say that again.

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.7

Farewell, My Turnabout

Okay so this is the Big One. This one’s a really complicated one to determine.

Let’s just get the first thing out of the way, the fact that Phoenix “”lost”” the case does not matter one way or another. Criminal Defense Lawyers, as a general rule, do not work on a Contingency Fee Basis. That means they are paid regardless of the result of the trial. So if this was a normal trial, Phoenix would probably be paid.

But this was not a normal trial, was it?

Phoenix was FORCED to work as a Defense Attorney due to a KIDNAPPER. And, like, my first instinct is ‘if you are already forcing someone to work via criminal means, why the hell would you also pay them??’ 

Buuuuut….. This is MY instinct, not the instinct of goddam Shelly De Killer. 

Since Shelly’s whole thing is being the Honorable Assassin, and he has some level of respect towards Phoenix as like a Fellow Professional. I can see him thinking maybe wanting Phoenix to get paid for the work he is Coercing Him To Do Under Threat of Murdering His Best Friend for the sake of Honor. 

But also also, Phoenix’s terms are not officially with De Killer, it’s with This Asshole!

And Matt Engarde is absolutely the kind of guy to casually take advantage of Phoenix’s frantic ‘please please just let me be your lawyer or my Friend is gonna Die!’ thing where, like, obviously getting paid is NOT gonna cross through Phoenix’s head atm in order to not pay/severely underpay the guy even though he can obviously afford it.

All in all, things are not looking good for this case’s probability, which is a shame considering how it ends.

Powers: Um, anyway… So, who's paying for this lovely dinner party? Maya: As if you need to ask! Everyone say, "Thank you" to Nick! Phoenix: Huh? Gumshoe: Ah, yeah… I'm kinda at the point where I can't even buy instant noodles, pal. So I kinda already put your name on the bill.

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.3

Turnabout Memories

First time covering a Lawyer that’s not Phoenix!

Now, Mia’s client in this case is a college student who probably doesn't have tons of personal funds, and considering her own motivations for taking on the case she probably would’ve done it for free but…

At the time she was employed at the Grossberg Law Offices, and Phoenix hired just the office in general and then Mia took over the case just last night.

Grossberg: Still, you surprised me… What, with your earnest request last night… "Let me handle this case!" you suddenly said. And quite forcefully, too! Mia: I just found out yesterday. About the case, I mean.

So... really this is just the Vibes I get from the Grossberg Law Offices, being generally the more professional and by-the-book law offices compared to the utter chaotic energy of Wright and Co, that makes me assume that they usually reliably charge their clients and pay their lawyers.

There’s some evidence further down the line (which we’ll get to soon) that some of their lawyers do some pro-bono work - but I dunno if Phoenix’s case was extreme enough to necessitate that (I mean he might be a broke college student but his family would probably help him with the legal funds although that assumes they even exist) . So my assumption is that Mia probably did get paid. Probably?

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.75

The Stolen Turnabout

So, Ron DeLite used to really financially struggle to keep up with his wife’s shopaholic habits - but that seems to have stabilized ever since his ‘benefactor’ showed up. So I’d assume he still has some funds left to pay his lawyer. I mean I guess it won’t be totally implausible if Desiree did manage to blow through them all…. Or maybe being a a high-spending shopaholic means that she’d want to pay extravagantly for her lawyer as well?

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.7

Recipe for Turnabout

It’s Maggey again! And now she’s:

Closer to a friend, or at least a friend-of-friend. Rather than Just Another Client.

Is probably in a more dire financial state than before, on account of being unemployed and also in jail for the last two months.

Also being a waitress isn’t that prestigious a job anyways 

And if anyone is gonna help her cover her legal fees it could only be Gumshoe which… does not bode well to anyone involved!

Pissed at Phoenix cause it took her some time to realize that no, that guy who got her found guilty two months ago is not him

So basically everything that changed since her last trial makes it less likely that Phoenix charged for his legal services. I'm sure she'd try her best by the end, but Phoenix might just wave it off to save everyone a headache.

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.3

Turnabout Beginnings

So first things first I want to reiterate that Criminal Defense Attorneys generally get paid regardless of if they ‘win’ and while I couldn’t find any concrete statements about the matter - I believe they get paid even if their clients die mid-trial??? I mean, the legal fees just get added to their posthumous debts? So the lawyer would hypothetically be able to claim their due payment from the deceased’s remaining funds and possessions. If they wanted to, that is…

Cause, well, this is why I said the Grossberg Law Offices might do some pro-bono cases. Terry Fawles was, like, a part-time tutor who has been incarcerated for the last five years. If he has any family or friends outside that could help him with his legal fees, he never mentions them. 

So I’m really not sure if he bought Mia services or if she volunteered to do this pro-bono after hearing he had no options for legal representations out of concern for, like, prisoners rights. 

And even if he was supposed to pay Mia for her service, after the grim ending of the case - I’m not sure if she would’ve even tried to pursue getting her legal fees from Fawles’ posthumously/from his next of kin. From how deeply traumatized she was by that trial, I think that would’ve only made her feel worse about the whole situation. 

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.05

Bridge to the Turnabout

Iris is a nun from a small temple that is mentioned to not-be-doing-so-hot (cause it’s tied with the Kurain Channeling Technique and it’s been on a downturn since DL-6), but she does have at least enough personal funds to have her own cell-phone and occasionally go into town. So it’s not a lot, but I think it’s enough to get Phoenix at least a a symbolic token-of-gratitude payment.

Also, it might be possible Phoenix will wave off the fees due to the Personal Connection to the case. You know, he was doing this primarily to Uncover the Truth and get some personal closure for the Dahlia mess.... Or maybe not, cause he did still get paid (or tried to get paid, or forced to get paid) to save his two Fourth-Grade-Life-Debt Childhood Best Friends in court?

(And I do mean just Phoenix, Miles probably would never charge for his services as ‘acting defense attorney’, we don’t need that farce to get any farcier)

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.3

Turnabout Trump

Now this is a complicated one, let us list the factors here one-by-one:

1. As per Apollo’s comment in the next episode, the Gavin Law Offices probably operated strictly quid pro quo.

(Good-bye, quid pro quo. Hello pro bono. sigh)

2. Phoenix is supposedly friends with the boss of the Agency. And in reality, Kritoph Gavin has a very VERY vested interest in making sure the trial goes According to Plan. Incentivising him to at least give Phoenix a discount.

3. Phoenix is also not doing that great financially right now. 

4. Oh right, that entire law agency disbanded once the boss got arrested at the end of the trial!

…Speaking of which, I may be out of a job. I work for Gavin Law Offices, after all. (I still can't believe I just saw Mr. Gavin get led away in handcuffs…)

I think it is most likely that Phoenix got some sort of “”Friend”” Discount from Kristoph. But I really don’t know what happens if an entire law firm gets disbanded right after the trial cause the owner got arrested as a result of it. It probably depends on whether Phoenix was in agreement with the Gavin Law Offices who then assigned Apollo on the case or if Phoenix had an agreement with Apollo directly.

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.5

Turnabout Corner

Oh hey, look! Another rare case of an Ace Attorney that actually discusses the issue of money directly!

Well, I mean we know how much Apollo got paid for solving the case of Phoenix’s accident and Trucy’s panties (nothing) and for solving Eldoon’s Noodle Cart Theft (a free bowl of ramen). We don’t see them directly discuss the subject of payment regarding Apollo’s Actual Job…

Apollo: Your request… let me guess, something's been stolen? Alita: Um, your flyer… It says "now defending" so I thought… Apollo: Whaaaat!? You mean, you mean you want me to defend you? Me? Trucy: Maybe you can tell us what happened? Were you hit by a car? Did someone steal your stand? Or your panties? Alita: No! No… I'm not the client, actually. The client would be my… well, my fiancé, I suppose you'd call him. Apollo: Fiancé…? What happened to him, then? Alita: He was arrested this morning. The charge… was murder.

But as he was complaining before about not only being pigeonholed as some sort of a detective, but also not getting paid for anything…

Um… I was wondering when I get paid? We solved the case of your accident, and um, found a missing article of clothing.

And then getting this job and being so happy about it...

Trucy: Polly! You look as happy as a clam in its shell. Apollo: For a lawyer this is it, the place where the battle begins!

Implies that He’s Getting Paid - just as much as with Phoenix’s rent stuff in ‘Turnabout Samurai’ if not more. 

Also, I don’t think the fact that the person who hired him wanted him to fail and is now going to prison is a factor here.

As I already mentioned, Defense Attorneys get paid regardless of the outcome of a trial and logically that would apply both when they lose and when they win. Plus, I am pretty sure Alita filed her request officially through Wocky’s name or the Kitaki family in general and they were obviously very grateful for what Apollo did, and they had both the wins and wills to pay him.

So let’s give a big round of applause for Apollo Justice, the WAA Lawyer most likely to get paid!

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.99

Turnabout Serenade

These kind of showbiz-focused Middle Cases are generally pretty good for Getting Paid Probabilities, but this case is a bit more complicated.

Cause the plot of this case hinges on Machi being so desperate for money that he was willing to risk death via cocoon smuggling,

Situation… I cannot explain. But money. I needed. Very much money.

That doesn’t necessarily mean he was unable to afford a lawyer - without details of why exactly he needed that Sweet, Sweet Cocoon Money we can’t be sure.  But it’s plausible that hiring Apollo was not out of his price range but he was desperate for something far more expensive. 

Considering his young age and… you know, until the final day of the trial he pretended to not understand a word of English, it’s also possible hiring Apollo was a matter handled by Lamirior and/or the duo’s agency. Both of which will probably feel committed to Actually Paying, each from their own angle. 

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.7

Turnabout Succession

Now, HERE’S a complicated one! 

Going generally over the usual stuff, Vera is a pretty nice person and she’s clearly grateful for what Apollo and Trucy did for her. And while the Misham Family was driven into forgeries by financial desperation, at the present-time they seem stable enough that Vera could at least afford the rates of the WAA. If this was just another case, it’ll get like a solid 0.7 at minimum. Pretty typical stuff by now.

But this isn’t just one more ordinary case. This a weird sort of ‘Test Trial’ for the Jurist System with every factor - including the Defendant and the Attorney - arranged by Phoenix’s weird little committee.

Well, for one, I'll be chair of the Jurist System Simulated Court Committee. The chair constructs the ideal situation… choosing the case, the jurist candidates… …even the judge and the courtroom.

Apollo: So… what kind of case is the trial simulation about? Phoenix: Well, since it is the first run through of a new system, I wanted something simple. Trucy: Good thinking! No sense wearing yourself out on something too serious! Phoenix: True. The case is a murder. Apollo: That's not simple at all!! Trucy: By "simple", did you mean that the defendant is… Phoenix: …Guilty. Yes. Most likely. …So, good luck, Apollo. Apollo: Um… with what? Phoenix: With the trial tomorrow. You're defending, of course. Recall that I said it had something to do with you.

So I guess the question here, did Phoenix basically make Vera officially hire Apollo? Did the committee hire Apollo and they’re the one paying him? Is this another case of Phoenix trolling Apollo into doing Free Volunteer Work for him?

Honestly I wouldn’t put that past the AA4 version of Phoenix..............but also if he did that I doubt he would’ve missed a chance to crack a joke at Apollo’s expense about that. 

...You know, I started this thread of thought with the thought I’m arguing for a lower Getting Paid score for this case but I think I just talked myself into increasing the probability.

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.8

Also bonus round: THE TRIAL OF SHADI ENIGMAR!

Zero fucking chances Phoenix got paid on this one. HIS CLIENT DISAPPEARED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE COURT PROCEEDING! And even if Phoenix gets paid before a trial is concluded (unlikely, since he didn’t know Larry wasn’t paying him until after the case was closed), he was his attorney for like half-a-day before he disappeared so wouldn’t have much of a chance either way.  And considering Zak’s character (and how he also tried to sabotage Phoenix’s current Poker-based career seven years after that), I doubt he put that much thought into Phoenix and his financial considerations to give him a down payment in case he had to to do his disappearnce act or whatever. The only thing Zak left Phoenix with when he left was his goddam abandoned child and ONE LESS BADGE!

So I think this case deserves a very special score!

Probability of Getting Paid: -1

Turnabout Countdown

It’s time for Athena’s first case! Or second case, depending on how you look at it.

Now, one of the major ways that Dual Destinies is gonna shake this Deep Serious Analysis up is that before we had, like, one Active Full-Time Lawyer at any time (maybe with a backup lawyer for Flashback Cases), and we now have Three Different Lawyers actively working together on the same cases. My main concern is primarily not which WAA Lawyers get paid for these cases, but IF any of them got paid at all. Still, shenanigans of cases changing hands officially and unofficially are gonna play a factor in my analysis as well.

And it’s here right from the start! We once again have a Lawyer defending their bestest friend in the whole world, and while some people’s instincts might suggest that means that Defense was for free, well… First things first, we already established Precedence for that back in the first trial of the first game with Larry (not for Lawyers getting paid by their friends, but at least expecting payment) and Juniper’s family is probably doing Just Fine considering she attends this super-fancy-pant prestigious Lawyer High School - so she would want to financially support Athena I would think.

And ALSO, Juniper technically didn’t hire Athena, Apollo was the one supposed to defend Junie in court at first. And although Juniper is… growing closer to Apollo at this point in canon, I don't think it's quite the ‘defend me in court for Free’ point of their relationship, compared to where Juniper and Athena are at. So this is just, like, one extra point to the Final Score!

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.7

The Monstrous Turnabout

So in this episode, we actually have two different jobs we need to make sure if Apollo actually got paid for. We have the actual criminal defense case, and we also have Babysitting Trucy.

Trucy: Oh, we'd better hurry. Doesn't look Daddy's going to make it, so let's get going. Apollo: Huh? Where are we going? What about the job he mentioned? Trucy: This IS the job, Polly! You're supposed to keep me company today! Now, come on! Apollo: Another day of not being a lawyer. Should've seen this coming. Trucy: Well, this is the "Wright ANYTHING Agency," y'know. And there's no law-related work at the moment, so… Apollo: (Tell me again why I chose to "work" here?) Where is Mr. Wright, anyway?

That being said, Phoenix might still be a bit of a troll but the WAA is doing a lot better financially now that Trucy has those Sweet Gramarye rights and he’s not quite as mean to Apollo as he was back in Hobomode. So I get a feeling that even with this little runaround, Apollo is probably at least getting paid for chaperoning Trucy around?? Probably?

The actual case is actually a lot more clear cut. It is directly mentioned that Damian Tenma could probably afford lawyers much more prestigious than the WAA, it’s just a matter of the WAA being the only ones crazy enough to take on this ‘doomed’ case. 

Trucy: Apollo! Maybe this is your chance. Apollo: Chance for what? Trucy: To do the right thing and defend Jinxie's dad in court! Apollo: Who, me? Wouldn't a man like Mayor Tenma have access to more experienced lawyers? Jinxie: Umm… You wanna know what the detectives said? They doubted there was a lawyer who could get a not-guilty verdict in this one.

And with Mayor Tenma’s personality being based around being almost overly-generous and grateful…

Tenma: How… incredibly… RUDE! Apollo: Umm, sorry. Did I do something to offend you? Tenma: A visitor when all others shun me like a common criminal! And here I am with nothing to offer! I am the epitome of rude! Apollo: (………Wait, so he wasn't mad at me?)

I feel like it is almost a certainty that Apollo and Athena did get paid for this case! 

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.85

Turnabout Academy

Okay so, it’s Junie again! Or Junie for the first time depending on how you look at it!

So all of the points I already brought up about Juniper from ‘Countdown’ still apply (save for the stuff about Apollo, of course) but ALSO this is right when Athena and Juniper reunited and their whole emotional arc in this case is about Athena feeling Juniper is being Uncharacteristically Cold and Distant towards her. So defending her on a Friend Discount would be a bit strange at this point. Maybe I can see Athena trying to insist she’d do it for free but Juniper refused?

Although I think that IS a bit weird that they had this big whole scene with Professor ScaryStatue taking over Juniper’s case and the issue of payment doesn’t even come up in passing. I mean, yes obviously, the issues of Trust and Truth and Aristotle Means being Sus as Fuck are the important things in this narrative but I’m suprised there’s not even a mention in passing. Like Means accusing Athena and Apollo of wanting this case back for the Money but they refute him???

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.8

The Cosmic Turnabout

Okay, look, I know I keep bringing up the Larry Precedence but it really IS quite relevant. If Actual Overly-Sentimental Human Disaster Phoenix Wright tried to charge a rate for his childhood best friend who was drifting through life doing weird odd jobs at that time. - Then Apollo, who is generally more practical minded, is probably going to charge a rate for his older acquaintance with the stable Astronaut Job. And while Solomon is a bit of a Space Larry, I don’t think he’d try and avoid the payment in quite the same way. Probably.

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.7

Turnabout for Tomorrow

This trial has Phoenix defending one of his own employees in a trial forced on by a hostage situation. I feel silly even extending this paragraph any longer. 

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.01

Turnabout Reclaimed

First things first, yes, an Orca cannot pay for an attorney - but I assume that the person who hired Phoenix is officially Sasha Buckler. Who IS a human being with her own funds capable of hiring a lawyer. Especially as we know that other lawyers turned her down specifically because her case is ridiculous (and not for financial reasons). 

Phoenix: What's the real reason you picked me, Sasha? Buckler: …Well, to be honest, I asked a whole slew of lawyers, but they all refused. They said stuff like, "There's no merit to taking your case," or "I'm not sure I can help." They're all as cruel as sharks, with hearts punier than whitebait!

She does mention doing a performance as thanks at the ending of the trial but that’s probably no replacement for Actual Money.

But I think most notable for our analysis about this case, is not actually any of the Orca stuff - it’s this exchange right here.

Blackquill: Today, the orca. Tomorrow, Sasha Buckler. You intend to save them both? Hmph. You say you "believe" in your clients, but isn't money really your true motivation? Why not admit you're only doing this for your own benefit? I could understand that much more readily than your empty, righteous talk. Athena: Our own benefit?! That's not why we're doing it! Phoenix: Now, Athena. Try not to let him get to you.

Yet another rare case of the game Acknowledging Lawyers Are Paid As a General Rule! And notably, when Phoenix and Athena deny it, they don’t deny the fact that they are getting paid - just that it’s not why they’re doing this. This is not exactly an explicit confirmation of Getting Paid to get the score up to a full 1, but it’s probably as close as we’re gonna get. 

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.95

The Foreign Turnabout

Okay, so Phoenix basically just bursted into the Courtroom and bluffed his way onto the empty defense bench despite the protests of his own so-called Client. Said client also only started unlearning his Defense-Attorney-Hate during that same trial. And is ALSO a tiny little child who has to work part time as a tour-guide to make end’s meet. I highly doubt Phoenix asked for anything more than, like, a very token rate or maybe a discount on his next tour. 

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.1

The Magical Turnabout

Considering how this case has a WAA Lawyer defending the actual CEO of the WAA, I highly doubt the WAA got any money from it. But maybe Trucy could give him some of her personal funds as a token of gratitude?

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.2

The Rite of Turnabout

It’s MAYA TIME again! And while some consideration has to go to her bond with Phoenix or the possibility of some sort of Frequent Accused card the WAA issued for her - the fact that she is not currently a Coworker at the law office and has been an Actual Independent Adult for quite some time now means it is actually a lot more likely she’s able to pay Phoenix now than in any case in the Original Trilogy!

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.5

Turnabout Storyteller

This one’s a pretty average case. The Defendant is not a total stranger, but he is more of a friend-of-a-friend (and Simon was originally planning to get Apollo or Phoenix into the courtroom so the connection was even more distant when he contacted the WAA). He seems to be doing alright financially with his own noodle business, and he’s a pretty alright kinda guy. The only possible concern is that he’s too totally slushed to remember he’s supposed to pay his attorney. But then again, Simon might be ‘officially’ the one who hired the lawyer for the case.

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.6

Turnabout Revolution

It’s time for the THREE CASES IN ONE SPECIAL!! Because we don’t just need to consider Dhurke’s trial, I think it’s only appropriate that we take into account both Apollo and Phoenix’s side of the civil case. They are both WAA Lawyers, after all.

On Apollo’s side, he is defending Datz Are'bal, an escaped prisoner/wanted revolutionary criminal in his own country hiding away in an abandoned building and making homemade lizard skewers for food- but Datz did apparently enter Japanifornia legally via legitimate means.

Apollo: What are the charges this time? Datz: Unauthorized entry, or something like that. They think I'm an illegal alien! And I can't prove otherwise ‘cause I lost my passport! Trucy: Is there any way they'd let you go? Datz: Not without my passport… If only I had it! Dhurke, AJ! You gotta find my passport! Apollo: …All right, we'll find it. (One more thing to add to our to-do list. Now, where might Datz's passport be?)

So he presumably has some sort of funds to pay Apollo for his legal services, at least a little bit. 

And with him being Dhurke’s best friend and knowing that he also struggled financially to make end’s meet as a defense attorney at first - I would like to think that’ll incentivise him to support Apollo financially if he can?

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.7

Meanwhile on Phoenix’s side, while Phoenix uses the word ‘hire’ when talking about working for Atishon. Phoenix was once again coerced via kidnapping into the position of attorney. 

And THIS time, there is no Assassin with a Code of Honor who might consider paying Phoenix a fair rate. Both Atishon and his ‘benefactor’ are sleazeballs who would not pay Phoenix a dime if they can get away with it. Plus, with this being a civil case, there might actually be a Contingency Basis going on when Phoenix basically quit and then they lose.

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.001

And finally, the grand event of this case - the Trial of Dhurke! 

So… Can a summoned undead spirit pay for an attorney? I suppose it’s probably easier in Khura'in than in other places. And it’ll mostly work the same as if the client died before the case finished, right? It’ll be considered a debt to be carried by their next of kin. Who in this case will be Nahyuta… but also maybe Apollo? Still, considering all of Dhurke’s living family ranges between ‘wealthy and well-respected’ and ‘Literal Royalty’ - I’m going to assume they’d be more than happy then to pay their Weird Brother for his help. 

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.75

Turnabout Time Traveler

And here we are! The last case, and a relatively straightforward one at that - at least compared to the last one lol!

Ellen herself does not have many funds as a housemaid, it seems - but since she literally just married one of the richest inventors in the world, I assume her husband is gonna cover the legal fees. The WAA Legal Team and Also Edgeworth and Ema also got an invite to the Wedding but I assume this is not instead of actual payment?

That is, of course, unless it’s technically Larry who hired Phoenix actually.

Then he’s never getting the goddam money he deserves for his labor.

Probability of Getting Paid: 0.7

Average Probability Score for All Cases (not counting the Zak Bonus Round): 0.51721875

So what have we learned today? I think that while the WAA’s reputation for basically giving away legal services for free is not entirely unearned, it is perhaps somewhat exaggerated. While there’s certainly a lot of Shennanigans and their rates are probably not high (especially not for people they know), they still get paid for a decent amount of high-profile cases. I mean, this Getting Paid Probability Score is over the 50% mark at least....

And… the odd thing is that the First Turnabout really is the only time the subject of the lawyer getting paid is really brought up directly. I get that it might, y’know, ruin the Drama if we acknowledge that our Brave Heroes are getting paid to save people from being convicted of a crime they didn’t commit - or on the other hand of the equation, that they should get paid cause They Need Money to Live. But still…

Is the fact that the only time payment is brought up directly is when Larry isn’t paying Phoenix a bad sign for the general financial situation of our Anime Lawyers? Or is it actually a good sign? Like, that they only mention Larry not paying implying that every time it is not mentioned that means the client did pay them?

[mayapapaya33]

I'm rewatching Exu: Calamity and I think they made a mistake with the name. The real title should be Exu: Actually, Vasselheim has good reasons for how it operates, even if they're dicks about it sometimes. Maybe it was too long, so they went with the snappier CALAMITY! Instead lol.

The end of the Calamity was only 840 something years ago. With Elves and dragons running around, some of them are definitely old enough where, if they didn't live during the Age of Arcanum themselves, their parents or grandparents would have and they would have been told a thousand stories of the fuck heads in flying cities who destroyed the world and were super annoying and dangerous long before they did that. Many more would be born during the latter part of the Calamity or raised by people who survived the Calamity who passes on those stories. Depending on the race we are talking anywhere from direct witnesses (Like the Bright Queen and Ludinus) to like 2-5 generations removed. Even humans with our short lifespans, it's really not THAT long, especially if you've got a bunch of old ass elves around teaching history class from a first person pov for like 500 years lol.

Intellectually people know that Critical Role, the world of Exandria is a post apocalypse story. Exandria is a scarred landscape that is just beginning to bounce back from the brink. But because it is recovering, it's easy to forget sometimes that it IS POST APOCALYPTIC. So people looking at Vasselheim in the modern day are like, 'bro, you really need to chill, everything's fine.' And Vasselheim is like... 'Chill? I do not understand the meaning of this word. And everything is fine... for now. We will be a bastion of civilization when the end times come once more. Fare thee well traveler.'

Then everyone rolls their eyes and moves on with their day. But if you really think about Vasselheim's isolationism and strength and distain for arcane magic in historical context, you can't really blame them. Are they over the top about their dislike of arcane magic? Sure. Is it quite possibly the most understandable over reaction in the history of over reactions? Also yes! They haven't made it illegal, they are just going to keep an eye on you, so you don't pull a Vespin Chloras and doom the planet to another few centuries of choked skies and sundered landscapes, that's all. Vespin was IN Vasselheim! Of COURSE they have strong feelings about it. The (Almost) End of the World began in Vasselheim due to arcane magic. If they had been stricter, maybe it wouldn't have happened at all!

And it really does paint their actions in Campaign 1 in a different light as well. Their isolationism can come across as shortsighted and selfish, until you view it from their point of view. Which is that they are constantly under threat, they know for a fact that Asmodeus wants their city destroyed, they are a bastion for the Prime Deities in a world filled with many heathens (lol that's where the dickishness comes in) and the Betrayer Gods would take any sign of weakness in their defenses and attack with glee. Hearing it in C1 it sounds like an excuse not to help against the Chroma Conclave, but it is literally just the truth from what I can tell. In BOTH Calamity and Downfall they have mentioned destroying Vasselheim being on the Betrayer God's to do list lol. If I was on a Betrayer God's to do list specifically, by name, I too would be somewhat paranoid and would not really want to disarm any portion of the city to go do something else. No matter how important the something else might be.

Vasselheim was basically like; Look, I'm very sorry to hear about your Dragon problem, that sucks, truly, but if we go out all willy nilly and leave this city undefended, it'll be fucked when we get back. When you have a real plan, come back and get us and we'll join you for the big fight. Until then, it's up to you, here you can have Kima as well, she's been desperate to get out of here anyway, and here's some supplies. We have larger concerns than one continent being attacked by four ancient Dragons. We are the seed bank for civilization for when shit inevitably hits the fan. We are the doomsday bunker for the Apocalypse, four Ancient Dragons are terrible, but they are not the Apocalypse. And they are right. Looking at it all in context, The Chroma Conclave are small potatoes. Horrific, monstrous, life destroying, but compared to the threat Vasselheim is preparing for, nothing.

They are the doomsday preppers of Exandria, except the threat is real and they are only letting their collective trauma and ptsd inform their decisions a little bit. They are actually fairly rational all things considered. This city withstood the entire Calamity. The stewards of the city must feel an enormous weight and responsibility to keep it safe going into the future. Imagine the pressure. Are you going to be the one to fuck it all up, after thousands of years? Sounds like a nightmare to me. The level of devotion and conviction required to keep something like that going is incredible.