#I'm still going to eat healthier as a goal but do you know how hard it is to find foods under 3 grams of fat??

[music-for-them-asses]

Good lord, I lost 5-6 pounds in one week 💀 That's what happens you can only eat liquids and foods under 3 grams of fat for a week, I guess 🥴

[skinscals]

I've struggled with binging my whole life. Now I've managed to lose almost 21lbs and more is coming off. I'd like to share some things I've used when I'm feeling like binging!

1. I WANT TO BINGE

It causes me legit anxiety when I get the urge to eat. Sometimes it's something specific, sometimes it can be moldy bread I have already. But if you feel like you want the food RN, think that you can always go and get it. Just, wait 10 minutes, if you really need it, it's okay, you can always go out and buy it. The food ain't gonna disappear anywhere. This mindset brings me kind of peace.

If you're feeling hungry but you've just eaten, drink water. Also remember to take your vitamins and supplements. If you have huge deficiency on those things your body may start sending hunger cues. If you lack vitamins, your body craves sugar etc.

2. I ALREADY STARTED BINGING

And you can stop it! You've already had a taste, right? You want to keep binging because you know how awesome it tastes. Brush your teeth and get the flavors out of your mouth! It helps! I use this all the time! I already started on my chocolate cake, I brush the taste off! It's the taste that keeps us wanting more!

3. I BINGED...

It feels like it's the end of the world... You hate yourself, so you decide that now on you start restricting even more, right? Please dont. Hold yourself accountable but do not punish yourself. If you binge, you probably have some mental issues you cope with food. Thinking about your binge too much creates panic and stress and self hatred, which causes you to binge again. Don't put any more mental load on yourself.

WHAT CAN I DO TO PREVENT THIS FROM HAPPENING?!

Take it from someone, who has struggled with this their whole life!

- Don't restrict too much. The cycle between binging and restricting will never end...

- When you eat, instead of focusing on how low cal it is, focus on will it make you full? If you eat 200 low cal stuff, and it won't make you full, you'll binge another 1000kcal in one sitting. Instead, focus on protein and nutrients and, Will this make me full? If it doesn't, they're stupid empty calories you ate for, uhm, for fun. If it does, you ate something to survive and keep your engine running. Be clever!

- If you use food as a coping mechanism or as a reward or anything, I feel you. This one's tricky, because coping mechanisms are important and you can't really take them away once they're learned. It's hard, and we may replace them with something more harmful and dangerous. Try things. Personally I find going on walks very effective. I listen Ed stuff or my favorite songs. If I feel very shitty, I may run until I can't breathe. And every time I feel better when I come home. I still use food sometimes, but now I have another option as well. Please, try things!

- if you crave something very specific let's say, chocolate, instead of forbidding it from yourself, buy a little bar of chocolate. Maybe even every day (count it's calories tho!) If you forbid something from yourself, you'll want it even more. And, guess what, binge on it. Which is better, one 200kcal bar of chocolate or 1200kcal chocolate bar? Between the two bad choices, pick the one that's less bad.

- Find replacement foods. If you crave chocolate for example, find something similar but healthier. I use protein bars. They're filling and chocolate! I won't be craving more after 1 or 2 and it's still better than eating the whole 1200kcal bar!

- Learn to love yourself now. Or even like. If that's too hard, please have even some respect for yourself. It's been studied that If you get negative encouragement, you'll probably fail but if you get positive encouragement you'll more likely succeed in what you're doing!

- Write your feelings and goals down somewhere and come back to them when you feel like binging!

- Remember that you're not perfect. If you have binging problem, you will binge in the future. But as you learn on the way, you'll binge less and less and one day you'll notice, that the last time you relapsed was 6 months ago. It's a journey as well. Learn from it.

If you have any questions, please feel free to ask anything! I hope these would help even one person. You got this.

Stay safe, love life and focus on your goals! 💕 You're amazing and you deserve to live happily!

[scarybabe]

You plan on losing weight after you reach your goal?

Obviously that is completely your choice and anyone who would deny you bodily autonomy can fuck right off.

That said, I hope you've done some research on this. Gaining and losing extreme amounts of weight takes a big toll on your body, and weight cycling causes a lot of the health issues that people regularly and incorrectly blame on fatness.

I don't say any of that as a feedist who just wants you to look a certain way - I'm saying it because I developed my ED trying to loose weight myself, and the dietitian I worked with has worked really hard to help me understand that I'm healthier staying fat than still trying to change my body.

I'm deeply sorry if this whole ask is intrusive and/or nothing you didn't already know - again, your body, your life, your choice no matter what. I just always feel obligated to say something just in case. I hope you're well!

I’m not losing an extreme amount of weight when I’m done with my gaining arc, not trying to lose weight quickly or even weighing myself while this is happening. I’m going to focus on building muscle and eating accordingly & still eating foods that make me happy and whatever weight my body settles at I’ll be happy!

If I’m feeling strong and happy and not having back pain or mobility challenges I won’t care about the number on the scale. I realize when I lost weight after gaining the first time, I put my health at risk and I do NOT want to do anything like that ever again. 🍓💕

Posting this just in case anyone else is ever in my shoes and needs ideas of how to go forward after focusing on weight gain for so long 🌸

[tcfkag]

2024 and the Return of the To-Done List

So, after a year during which (a) our daughter ran full-speed (literally) into the trying two's, (b) I had multi-focal pneumonia that resulted in a week or two in the hospital (including a brief sojourn in the ICU), (c) I had bizarre, seemingly inexplicable seizures for the first time ever [which meant I couldn't drive for six months...right after we moved to a semi-"rural" town...for the northeast that is], (d) had an acute kidney injury, (e) had several bouts of unexplained pitting edema in my legs, (f) started a new job that I actually really like, even if there is a steep learning curve, and (g) lost my Mom after a long battle with mild to moderate dementia/Alzheimer's that then dropped off a cliff into end-stage dementia in less than six months (depending on how you count it), and (h) just generally felt like I was never managing my physical or mental health as well as I could or should be, I'm going to try to make some changes. These aren't resolutions because I truly think that New Year's resolutions just set you up to fail. Instead, I'd call them goals. Or, at least, hope that I want to support with action as much as I can. While still giving myself grace knowing that I can and probably will mess up along the way. But, the first step is that I'm going to try to bring back a kind of journaling-like activity (since I suck at journaling) that my old therapist recommended when I was feeling like this before. Each day I make a list, generally on Tumblr for at least a tiny modicum of peer pressure, and I just make a list of everything I've done that day. No matter how big or how small. As she put it "make it your base assumption that each day, you will do absolutely nothing, so you get credit for everything, even things as simple as showering. I frequently restart these lists when my depression and anxiety have gotten bad enough that I know I'm not taking care of myself, mentally and physically, so a big part of my goals are (a) to move more [in whatever form that takes], (b) eating healthier, and (c) to take care of several medical/dental appointments that I've been putting off for way too long. The beauty of the list is that, a lot of the time, I ended up doing stuff BECAUSE of the list. So that I won't be staring at an empty page as I try to make my list each year.

Things I'm proud of today...so far:

when we took Peanut to the trampoline park to burn off some of her "no daycare today suckers" energy and this time, I bought a jump pass for myself. I only made it ~30 minutes but it was a great work-out. 10/10 would recommend.

I took the dogs for the "long" trail walk out to the back of our property,

I did a core and flexibility routine this morning,

I decided to take one for the team and point out to my Uncle that the nostalgia he feels about Aunt Jemimah as a syrup mascot isn't as important as the company making money off the likeness of a woman who died 100 years ago who was used as a stand in for the generic idea of what an enslaved (or recently freed) Black woman did or should do, and (finally)

this one is a few days late, but not only did we drive 12+ hours to visit my in-laws for Christmas, but we also stopped in NJ in both directions to pick up Monotasker's Aunt who is 80-years-old, hard of hearing, and in the early stages of dementia or Alzheimer's and I didn't even lose my shit at a single person...even the ones who deserved it.

Happy New Years everyone!

"May the best of your todays be the worst of your tomorrows." (Jason Mraz) And even if the worst of your todays are the best of your tomorrows, I hope you can still find your way out and through by the light of the moon to guide you.

[bita-bita]

As I said, my doctors are panicking abt my medical test results. And I'm still in the process of having more tests done.

Um.. so last night I was really depressed cuz my doc literally said I might die ://// idk if he meant it FOR REAL or if he just wanted to make sure I know it's a serious case and I should keep getting checked just to make sure it's nothing. Ok Idk, my body feels alright tbh, I'm really surprised they're suddenly saying that sort of stuff- ANYWAY.

What I wanted to say is that I believe anything that happens is connected to our inner feelings and thoughts. Like.. idk, illnesses can be a sign of oppressed emotions, jealousy or long-term anxiety, holding a grudge, envy or fears and stuff like that. Um, so when I was faced with this situation, I tried to find a lesson in it. And sometimes "bad things" that happen can actually help push us in the direction we desire.

For example, I'm a very anxious person. I have anxiety. And I'm hard on myself in the sense that I think I'm responsible about how I make ppl feel. (And yes that's true to a certain degree, I shouldn't go around kicking ppl. But do I need to overthink my every word and tone and action to the point of being extremely anxious? Do I have to hold such a high standard when it comes to every move I make?) I KNOW it's not good. It bothers me. It feels bad. But it was never bad enough to make me wanna make a serious change, yk? It's easier to just.. let it be and have the same familiar thoughts and feelings.

And so, the importance of the situation made me FORCE MYSELF to take some time and direct my thoughts in a way that I intended, not just some default patterns that cause me anxiety. Not to go with the familiar flow.

Cuz if I keep being the same person, having the same thoughts and feelings, doing the same things, how can I create something different? How can I expect to be a better, healthier, happier Bita?

I actually thought about it, cuz I was forced to! And I'm glad I was. Cuz otherwise I probably wouldn't have. and I realized, well I am gonna die someday, whether now or years from now, really doesn't make a difference, but thinking about the possibility of it all coming to an end, made me realize I don't want to live a life filled with worry and anxiety. I noticed I have goals and dreams. There are things I wanna experience, as Bita, in this time space reality. I know it doesn't end, and I know my experience of existence isn't limited to 100 years in Bita's human body. but still, there are things I wanna do AS Bita. And so I've decided nothing is worth getting mad at, and nothing is worth worrying over or getting anxious about. It's not worth it, not if it's going to cause distress to my lovely body. It's serving me well, it's doing its best, how can I put so much stress on it? How can I be so hateful towards it? How can I not be gentle and appreciative with it? It deserves all the love! It connects me to the physical realm! It lets me taste delicious food that's only possible in this amazing physical world! It helps me breathe, it pumps blood and life through my vains, and it moves me around the world, to beautiful places! Yeah nonphysical is cool and all, and yeah, I'd love to go back there and get the answers to my many questions, but.. but this world is soooo cool too! It's limited in a sense, yes. Things take fucking long to get created here, yesss. BUT CAKE! I WANNA EAT CAKE! You can't grab a piece of cake and bite into it in the nonphysical, you can't tasteeee the sweet taste on your tongue, it's not a concentrated feeling, it's great yeah but it's vague and it's... it's not physical!! I realized I LIKE physical! I still want to be physical! I'm not done with this world yet! And more importantly, I refuse to go out with an illness!!! I want a cool way of going *wooosh* back to nonphysical!

I mean if it's nothing and I'll keep living, I'd like to live a better life here for now! And if I'm to die, then I'd like to die with a good feeling, not like a miserable saddd person :/

Surely I still feel anxiety about the situation, and other things. but that's just a pattern that's familiar to me. it will take some time to change, but if I hold onto this feeling, this memory, this awakening, I'll eventually grow out of this habbit.

Mom is complaining abt something I did? Not worth getting upset about.

My friend did something I didn't like? Why get mad when I can keep my heart open and see people as.. just people. they are trying too, they have challenges too, not everyone wants to harm me, not everyone has ill intentions. I should love, for my sake. Not because they deserve it or don't.

I am my responsibility. I'm willing to let go, to forgive, to trust, to love, because of myself. Because it feels good to ME. It feels better than hating and criticizing.

To put it simply, I'm gonna chill out y'all!!! Everything has a solution. Everything can be fixed or replaced. Life is not a big deal. It's really not.

Pt. 2

[amysubmits]

hey Amy, I wish your doing well..

I wanted to ask you for an advice.

I am not really self conscious about my body and my body image and how much I weight, but I am not really confident in my body either. In the last month or two I have gained weight not much but it was my first time seeing that number on the scale, I am fine with it and I am accepting it because it was final exams season and I was under so much stress so I am going easy on myself. And so was my Daddy, he has been supporting, didnt make me feel bad about it. But he said after you are done with your finals you will eat better and lose the extra weight, it was like him caring for me rather than him saying that as an order. I do agree that I wanna get in shape better, eat better and exercise to just get me back on check. Now that I am done with my finals, I was telling him about me being thick and that a pair of pants got so tight on me and he responded with yes you are thick and you "need" to lose a little bit of weight. The way he said it made me upset, that he said I "need" to. I honestly don't know if am a little overreacting or not, can you advise me on how to communicate better in such situations..

PS he isn't toxic and he isn't controlling and he loves my body and always supports me, this our 1st incident regarding my weight at all..

Hi Anon,

I think it's super understandable that you feel hurt by what he said even if he didn't mean it negatively at all.

Like you, I don't see myself as having body-image issues in general. I feel really privileged for that.

And yet...I know I would still have a really negative reaction if anyone told me they thought I needed to lose weight. In a lot of ways, that coming from your partner makes it extra painful, I'd think.

I can't tell for sure from your ask if he was basically giving his opinion of what he thinks you should do, or if he was saying that you eating better and losing weight would be something he's imposing on you as your dom. If it was the latter, I personally really disagree with that. I just think weight loss is something that should not be brought into D/s. I think eating healthier can maybe be okay in some D/s dynamics but I think that should only happen if it's coming from the sub.

For lots of things, I think it's okay for the dom to propose rules or expectations. Of course, the sub would still have to agree to those ideas for them to be implemented. But eating, diet, exercise, etc are one of the areas where I think rules or expectations should only be brought into D/s if they are suggested by the sub, and if they are coming from a healthy mindset. For example, if a sub wanted to start exercising 4x a week, not because they hate themselves, but for emotionally healthy reasons, and they asked their Dom to hold them to that expectation, I think that can be okay for some subs. But I don't think a dom should ever tell a sub that they need to start exercising or eating a certain way. And even when a sub is the one initiating the change, I think it's best to focus it on a positive replacement rather than on a negative. For example, I think a rule like "eating 3 servings of veggies per day" is a way healthier rule to use to encourage healthy changes rather than "No more than 1 sweet/dessert per week". I don't think that a requirement or expectation of weight loss is ever okay to bring into D/s. I guess I should put a disclaimer in here that this is just my values, I'm not a mental health professional or anything like that. I feel pretty strongly though that some things like expecting weight loss or having a dom control a subs food intake, is really unhealthy. And, given that your dom has now said you 'need to' lose weight, I personally would have a hard time giving him power of anything to do with your eating or fitness because I would struggle to see even positive rules/expectations as being well intended now.

Anyway. My goal with the conversation you have with your Dom would be to express the following:

That it hurt your feelings when they said that you need to lose weight. That you disagree that you need to and that it's a hurtful thing to say even if you did feel you needed to lose weight.

That you haven't consented to them controlling your weight or your diet, so them telling you what you were going to do in this area is not appropriate.

With you saying that you felt that they had your best interest in mind, you can sort of soften these statements some by explaining that you know they meant well. Still, that doesn't change that they hurt you and overstepped their role so it's important to make that clear. It's really about defending your boundaries or the limits of your D/s dynamic.

If you agree with me that this just isn't an area that D/s should be involved with, I'd encourage you to express that belief to him so that he understands it's not really about exclusively what he said, and is more about it just not being a healthy thing to do with D/s.

Or - if he wasn't trying to impose these eating and weight loss expectations on you in a D/s way, but still stated it as something you need to do? Then I'd still explain to him that it was hurtful, and then explain how as a sub, if he tells you that you need to do something, even if he isn't specifically proposing it as a rule or D/s expectation, that as his sub, anytime he tells you that you 'need' to do something, it carries a lot more weight than someone else saying the same thing would. In this case, I'd think he needs to recognize how powerful his words are to you.

Best of luck to you.

Ps - I am a bit worried that this post might trigger some strong reactions from other people. It's a really sensitive topic. So before I even publish this, I want to add that the reason I am not providing a more strongly-worded reaction myself is because the anon specifically said she feels her dom is not toxic, and that he was coming from a place of care. My instinct is to not see a statement like 'you need to lose weight' that way - but I trust that she knows her dom better than I ever could from a single ask. So I based my answer around trusting her assumption.

[boy-on-venus]

an update??

i have been looking for a new job for a while now, but everywhere around me does not pay well and it is so frustrating trying to look around when no one will reach back out.

at the moment i have been doing okay with my mental health, but the stress of saving money is really hitting me.

i have also been trying to go to the gym more constantly, but sometimes it just seems like it is so hard to go.

i do however have a goal; i don't want to enter my 25 year around the sun disliking my appearance. ever since the covid lockdown i have really gained weight, and i've never been so self conscious with myself. it's like a new level of self hate, but i know it is something that i can work o, and i am.

a good update is that A is getting medically discharged from the military, so that means we will be able to leave fl soon, but it cannot come soon enough if i'm being honest.

i do still miss my friends a whole lot, and it makes me upset that for over a year, none of them have made an attempt to come out and see me in fl. when i tell them that i am moving to az they all get excited because i will be closer, and i understand that it would be easier, but i feel like at least one of them could have come out here to visit and stay for at least a weekend.

i'm, also very excited to be a lot closer to my family when i move to az. the amount that i miss all of them is insane, but a five hour drive or one hour plane ride is a lot better than around $700 plane ticket and a whole day of traveling.

A and i also tried to follow a new diet, where we did not eat gluten or dairy. it did not last long if i'm going to be honest. it's hard to follow a strict diet when there's not much money to buy the supplies that you need. so we decided that we can cut out most of the foods that were bad for us, but not completely restrict ourselves from all the food. hopefully that will help both of us lose some weight because he also needs to as well. we have both gotten chubby and it has definity negatively impacted our sex drive which is upsetting.

anyway, here's to a healthier rest of the year. and the premiere of The Little Mermaid!

honestly, i don't even know how to use tumblr anymore.

goodnight for now.

x

[languageyeti1985]

Mind Games With A Dash Of Wit.

at the back of your mind

When you say something is at the back of your mind, you are subconsciously aware of or vaguely remember it - sometimes, it is better to recall somewhat an event than to feel guilty.

"Even though I promised myself to start eating healthier, the image of that delicious chocolate cake is always at the back of my mind during meal times, silently tempting me."

(be) in two minds about (someone/something)

When you are in two minds about someone/something, you feel uncertain or hesitant about a decision or opinion you must face.

"I'm in two minds about going to the gym today. Part of me wants to get fit, but the other part is deeply in love with my couch and a good Netflix series."

cross your mind

When something crosses your mind, it briefly enters your thoughts or awareness, but you usually forget about it quickly.

"It suddenly crossed my mind while I was in the shower that I had left the oven on. So, I ran out in a foamy panic, only to realise that my wife's family were in the living and I hadn't even turned it on in the first place!"

get (someone/something) out of your mind

When you try to get someone or something out of your mind, you are trying to stop thinking about them or it. Sad to say, this sometimes is nearly impossible to do.

"No matter how hard I try, I just can't get my ex out of my mind. It's like they've taken up permanent residence in my brain, rent-free!"

give (someone) a piece of your mind

When giving someone a piece of your mind, you express your opinion forcefully, often when angry or frustrated, using vulgar language.

"When my flatmate ate the last slice of pizza without asking, I had to give him a piece of my mind - and let's just say it wasn't a small slice, and I added a long list of jobs they never do around the flat!"

go blank

We have all been there. So, when you go blank, you suddenly forget something or have your mind become empty of thoughts - usually when you need to answer a question, which isn't enjoyable.

"During the exam, I went completely blank when I saw the first question. It's like all my knowledge decided to take a vacation at the worst possible moment!"

mind your own (fucking) business

When you tell someone to mind their own (fucking) business, you are being blunt or forceful way of telling them to focus on their affairs and not interfere with others.

"When my nosy neighbour asked me why I was receiving so many packages, I politely reminded her to mind her own (freaking) business before jokingly suggesting she might need a new hobby rather than watching me."

(something) broadens the mind

When you say something broadens the mind, you refer to experiences or activities that expand one's understanding, perspective, or knowledge.

"Travelling to different countries broadens the mind. Who knew you could survive solely on pizza and gelato for a week and still feel culturally enriched?"

the last thing on your mind

When something is the last thing on your mind, it is not a priority or concern at all.

"With the deadline looming, fixing the printer was the last thing on my mind until it suddenly started printing pictures of cats wearing sunglasses and outfits. Now, it's my top priority!"

to have a lot on your mind

When you have a lot on your mind, you are preoccupied or deeply concerned about something that seems ever-present.

"Between work deadlines, family commitments, and trying to remember to water my neglected houseplants, I've got a lot on my mind. So, if I forget your birthday, know it's not personal, Darling!"

to have a one-track mind

When you have a one-track mind, you are overly focused or obsessed with a single topic or goal. That can be good or bad, depending on what you are obsessed with 24/7 - so please make it a good thing.

"My dog has a serious one-track mind when it comes to food. He could be sound asleep, but the mere sound of a treat bag crinkling will have him teleporting to the kitchen in seconds!"

to put (someone's) mind at ease

When you put someone's mind at ease, you try to make someone feel calmer or less worried about something, usually by being supportive.

"When my friend was nervous about her first driving lesson, I told her not to worry because I had full faith in her driving skills. Of course, I conveniently omitted the part where she once mistook the accelerator for the brake pedal - I hope I put her mind at ease!"

to read (someone's) mind

When you read someone's mind, you accurately guess or understand what someone else thinks or feels, which can be easy or exceedingly difficult to do.

"My husband can never hide his true feelings from me. I always know when he's forgotten our anniversary because his guilty expression practically screams, I forgot to buy flowers - it is easy to read his mind!"

[tavarillasgalen]

almost started crying thinking about how i started the year vs how it's going now.

because looking into 2023, i was expecting to move states with my ex, i was hoping for a proposal, etc.

and then during our NYE celebrations, after months and months of conversations where i was led to believe we would be able to move this year, he dropped the bomb that he had over a year worth of hours left before he could get his license to practice. because he'd dropped down to working 7 hours a week, and hadn't told me. and then he thought he would have to start over from scratch, because apparently his years worth of hours he had weren't being tracked. and no, it wouldn't make sense for the two of us to move in together before moving out-of-state, because "we had to save", as he had... thousands of dollars in credit card debt. and he would be annoyed at his parents telling him he needed to work more and all this (which... if you're only working like... 1 shift worth of hours a week... yeah....)

and so i started 2023 feeling absolutely devastated. my major goals, my major hopes for the year had been dashed mere hours before the year even started. i felt extremely suicidal, to be honest, because i was like, "so, we just... do this... for... who even knows how much longer... over a year longer... you can't even promise that we'll move next year (2024)...." and he was like, "yeah, it sucks, i know", as he... was perfectly content and did not seem at all like he thought it sucked.

and that was honestly the breaking point for the relationship. because there were so many times it should have ended, so many red flags, but i stayed and stayed and stayed because i was like, as soon as we move in together, it'll be better, as soon as we move to another state, it'll be better, i know it will.

like, i stayed with him for another month and a half. but then our 7 year anniversary hit. and i was like, this isn't something to celebrate to me. we're been together for 7 years, we don't even live together, we WON'T live together anytime soon, we constantly have the same fight, i feel so taken for granted, and honestly, i couldn't ignore the red flags anymore.

so i broke up with him.

and after YEARS of being near-constantly suicidal, that... almost immediately went away. like, sure, i still get passing thoughts sometimes (passive thoughts, not active thoughts). but it's rare now, only when i'm really upset about something. whereas before, it was 24/7. it was like a fucking miracle.

and i started to realize all the things wrong with that relationship.

and i started my hobbies again.

i regained my relationship with my family.

i started seeing my horse so much more.

i lost 20lbs.

my skin (mostly) cleared.

my social anxiety is gone.

i don't have friends again yet, but there is potential for friendship in some new acquaintances.

i achieved goals i'd wanted to reach for years (splits, abs, going back to ballet, etc).

i got promoted at work.

i eat so much healthier.

i'm so much less afraid to speak my mind now that i'm not bending over backwards to please someone else.

i started actively planning for the future now that i'm not constantly waiting on someone else.

i don't want to die anymore.

i actually want to live. even on the hard days, when everything goes wrong.

no, my life is nowhere near where i want it to be. i want to live on my own, have friends, all these things.

but i'm working on getting it there.

and that's an incredible feeling.

[actualtext]

Dec 11, 2022

Refelction 3

1. What is going on inside your head right now?

The closer February gets, the more excited I am to start a new chapter in life. I think what I'm most excited about aside from the change is the fact that I'm going to have to do things in order to succeed at this task of moving. For instance, I'll -at some point- need to set up an appointment for the DMV to register my car to Indiana. I get really excited about potentially completing tasks (if I can remember to do them).

2. What negative emotion keeps cropping up the most lately?

I've been worried I'm not working hard enough and that I wont be able to make my deadline. I will say that the only reason I don't work so hard is simply becasue I take time off to socialize as a form of self care. I still feel guilty sometimes about that. I feel like I don't deserve to take a break if I haven't reached my goal. I'm going to be honest, I don't think I'll be reaching my goal this week. I only have $100 to go, but I went to a birthday party out of town which took all of my day and today I got my car worked on, decided to journal, and have a girls night planned with some ex co workers. I know me spending time with friends is healthy, and I will admit, I do feel a whole lot better than I did a couple days ago. I just someitmes forget how healthy it is to not always work all the time. haha

3. What has made you the happiest lately?

It's gonna sound weird but the other day I was sitting with Vlad at a coffee shop in Austin, Christmas music was playing it was a vibe. We had ordered a vegan chocolate chip cookie, it was the last one in the display case. That first bit was complete bliss. They warmed it up for us, and we paired with with vegan lattes and let me tell you. It was like I bit into a little piece of heaven. I felt a shock go through my body from the sweetness that first bite held. It was like when you think of eating a pickle and yoru mouth starts to salivate. Simply amazing. That feeling, that setting, the complany, the taste. All together it made me so happy. I felt joy for the first time in a hot minute.

4. The last time you felt this way, what did you do?

The last time I felt like I wasnt working hard enough, I became a workaholic and ignored any social opportunities. It was very isolating and I've learned from that experience to not do that again. lol This time I've made the effort to hang with friends at least once a week.

5. What holds you back the most from moving on from negative emotions?

Just constantly forgetting what path I've chosen to take. Like one day I could choose to work out three times a week, but after a few days of being of track I might fall off cause its not part of my everyday life. With that being said, if it's not something I need to think about regularly, I'll probably forget it. So, working out in this example, I would only think of when when I finally remembered. It would actually be easier if I just told myself "I'm going to choose healthier options for each meal instead of what I would normally eat" since I eat on average, three times a day.

6. Which emotions are you trying to avoid right now? why?

I'm trying to avoid feeling unmotivated. I feel like I'm not doing enough while also feeling like I'm doing the most that I can. I'm just constantly trying to find a balance, while also trying not to stop moving forward. I'm trying not to think about how I can be better and trying to be satisfied with what I'm able to do. Right now theres a giant (HUGE) pile of clothes on my floor and bed that needs to be washed. I literally just ignore it because right now I'm focusing on other things. Getting my car worked on, working, trying to socialize, etc. I know I should do it, and I want to do it, but if I think about doing it right now while I have so many other things going, I'm going to feel overwhelmed. I'll do it tomorrow when work is slow, and I don't have anythiing planned. And at that, I'll only do as much as I can before I start getting frustrated with how much laundry I have to do. lmao As you can probably tell, I'm trying to control how much stress I'm exposed to. I'm honestly really good at doing this. It's like eternal compartmentalization. XD I have a feeling I'm going to get back on to-do list kick.

SIDE NOTE-sometimes I go into phases of super interest, and then just as quckly hop out of those phases. to do lists were on. I used to make to do lists for everything, and then I stopped. I used to make spreadsheets and then I stopped. Same with everything else. Sometimes I'll be really interested in something for a while and then just like nothing, that.... fixation(?) will just go away and I'm either on to the next thing or dont have anything I'm fixated on. It feels like little bursts of obsession. Its kinda of weird.

7. What is your inner critic telling you lately?

I'll probably never be able to make up my mind about anything. Even in high school, I didn't know what electives I wanted to do so I did them all. I was in choir most of my school career, but I also did mariachi, art, dance, JROTC, graphic design, theater. Everything except for band, cheer, and athletics.

Why can't I chose things? At this point is effecting my life. Like I don't know what path to follow because theres so many and it's so overwhelming so Im just kinda of stuck in limbo not going in any particular direction. haha I hate this.

[satansxlapxcat]

Baby Steps...

For real though, baby steps are key when you're trying to accomplish any big goal. I know - I sound like your parent or your therapist, but it's true.

I've spent years of making these lofty 'New Years Resolutions' that were going to completely change my life and guess what? They always failed. And then guess what? I felt like a absolute piece of garbage that couldn't accomplish anything I set my mind to. It's not a good place to be in when you're telling yourself you can't do anything right.

After a few years of saying, "screw this, I'm not making resolutions period," the past two Januaries I have tried something different. I still don't make resolutions because they can be just as toxic as "that girl" culture to those of us who had to reparent ourselves (#trauma), but I make a plan for what I want to accomplish throughout the year and lay out the steps I need to take to get there.

As an example, one goal is that I'd like to get to the point where I'm exercising four times a week. Three doing strength training and cardio, and one doing yoga. Doesn't seem too hard, right? Not until you start putting off a day because you're too hungover, or because you made plans to go on a date with that cutie and have to wash your hair, or because work that day sucked and you just want to sit on the couch and zone out to Netflix, and then guess what happens? You start to dog on yourself for not accomplishing that seemingly easy goal you set for yourself and just give up completely. At least that's how my traumatized brain works.

This year, I'm approaching this goal with small actionable and measurable steps. The first is limiting my drinking to just one day a week. Can't wake up too hungover to function if you don't drink, right? Next, I'm asking a personal trainer friend (with benefits, can't wait to say I'm screwing my trainer lmao) to put together a full body routine I can do at the gym twice a week. Once I get a couple of weeks under my belt of successfully going twice a week, I will feel more motivated to keep trying because I've built that momentum, self confidence, and positive self talk/reinforcement.

Now trust me, I haven't started the working out bit quite yet, but I've already started only drinking one day a week (I picked Sundays because brunch and nighttime drinking is discouraged because work on Monday morning), and not only can I tell the difference physically but mentally I am high-fiving myself and punching the air because I am doing it! I've stuck with it! And you know what? I'm more likely to stick with it because of how good this feeling of accomplishment is.

I don't mean for this to sound all fitness influencer-y, but I do mean for this to be an honest and realistic view of approaching goals in a way that will actually help you achieve them rather than beating yourself up for not doing it perfectly. You can do this for any goal you might have - saving more money for vacations, keeping your space cleaner, bulking up on your skincare routine, eating healthier more consistently... All you have to do is take the big goal, break it down into smaller bite sized pieces, and take things one baby step at a time.

What are your goals for this year? Leave a comment below and let's chat about it. I'm no expert, but maybe we can help each other make our plans!

[0daytrick0]

New year, new me..?

So, last year is officially a wrap. And with the new year of 2023 being now, it can be alot to digest.

Some keynotes of 2022

I moved out of my parents house

I moved in to a unit with my partner

My partner and I purchased a little pup called Elli

I started and quit two jobs, having a total of 3 jobs this year

I tore the tendons in my ankle

I started and finish my 6 months of university at JCU

As for this year, I have found myself not so much focusing on changing myself and my routines but more on understanding myself and what I need.

I'm still setting goals, creating vision boards, organising life admin tasks. But alltogether, I'm not trying to force myself into anything. Most people would set out to go to the gym, get out more, eat healthier, ECT. But for me personally, I'm just trying to find and maintain a healthy balance in my life. Sure, I might set out to occasionally visit a gym, go on more walks, read more and be more productive. But overall, I'm just trying to enjoy my space and myself and in turn, understand my identity. I'm also trying to be realistic with myself.

Recently, through trying to understand myself, I took up a human design course with my boss. From what I have understood, human design is merely a guide to living a more successful, beneficial life. It's a manual to help understand you inner self. Rather than listening to your brain (or at times your heart), human design sets out to teach you how to listen to your inner authority and in turn, lead the best life you can live.

Through talking with my boss (who specialises in the area), she read my whole life story purley through the consequences and expectations of being a projector. It was so strange to listen to this person I barley know bring up life events that she would have no idea about. To be able to speak about situations I have been in and how I would of felt without first knowing about them... It truly made me intrigued to learn more about human design to say the least.

By being a projector, I have learnt that this is the reason I feel everyone's emotions on an extreme level. It explains why I don't need to get drunk to be drunk. It explains why my energy levels are so low and how my energy levels can shoot through the roof when I'm with other people. It explains why I have spent my whole life trying to help people and why I am so invested in the works of being a psychologist. Everything about my own life; From my past to my present to even my future, has been all explained from being grouped in a category of projectors. It's absolutely eye-opening information. And it is most certainly what I needed to learn to start this year off.

To then do my own research and learn my partner is a manifesting generator. It's like all the puzzle pieces finally came together. I am definitely very thankful to my boss for showing me this path and sharing her knowledge for free with me. Especially since these human design sessions go for just under $200 a session. For her to do it for free with me, definitely feeling very thankful right about now.

This knowledge has definitely come in handy leading up to leaving my hometown for university. In just a few weeks, I will have my boxes packed and leaving for a 13 hour trip to my new home for the next 3 years. To think about leaving this place, after 12 years, to be somewhere new all on my own. It just doesn't feel real. Reality is not hitting yet, despite telling myself over and over that I'm leaving.

What makes this so hard is the fact that I will be on my own. Utterly and completely on my own. My partner will not be coming with me straight away. Or even at all for all we know. I will be leaving my friends behind. My family. It's alot to take in... And a very hard thing to process...

As of right now, I feel like I will thrive. To be on my own, away from my partner, focusing on just myself. Learning to be independent and alone. I kind of look forward to the idea. But oh the little things I will miss. All the things that usually annoy me about this town will I crave for. I know once I leave, I will want to come running straight back. But, by preparing for this potential mindset, and combating what's yet to be, I feel I am effectively preparing myself for the worst efficiently. By knowing that these thoughts will come, that the hard times will at times, feel like they never end, I feel I have what it takes to push through.

This year is going to be tough. And knowing how hard last year felt, I know it's going to be no different this year. But, with the friends I have by my side, and the family I have joined along with my partner I love, I have all the support I need to pursue through. No matter how dark times may get, knowing people I care about have my back for once in my life truly does make all the diffence.

I really do strive to make this year great. To find inner peace and balence. To learn, grow and develope. Let's be sure to do what must be done to the future success on myself. I really do want future me thanking her past self. so with that, I will now head in out and get my grind on.

Tootaloos for now

-Daytrick

[pop-pop-pop-popculture]

What is your goals for new year

Find a full-time job that pays a good, livable salary

Complete an internship

Lose weight. I obviously won't say how much I weigh, but once C*VID took into effect, I gained 15 pounds 😞😭. My goal is to get back down to what I weighed before 2020.

I always do this, but I'm still going to write it: Workout more. I most often jog in the morning and do a little workout routine before I go to sleep.

Move out, whether it’s to a new state or city in my state.

Eat healthier. This isn't much of an issue for me, but I still wanted to write it down.

And...

Limit eating out to once (or twice) a week. I'm already trying to get back into this old habit, because, for me personally, if I start now, then it'll be easier for me to continue.

|-----------------------------------------------------------|

2020-2022 was hard for me in terms of trying to stay healthy and my physique, and I know the workforce played a huge role in that, so now that things are basically back to pre-2020 normal and we're already entering year three of the 2020s, I now need to get back into shape and get back into my old, pre-2020 good habits. Whoa.. that was a run-on sentence. 😅 As far as the workforce is concerned, I’m working in an industry I’m genuinely interested in and makes me happy. Thank you for the ask!

What about you??

[sevikasleftpussyflap]

Could you possibly (if it's not at all triggering or uncomfortable for you) do something for Sevika x reader with an ED? One more so on the an0rexia/restrictive ED end of the spectrum?

If not I totally understand, I just haven't really seen anything like this for her and I would personally find it very comforting and I just love how you write her 💜💜 keep doing what you're doing even if you don't take this request!!

Hello! Thank you so much for the request and sorry for the wait. I've definitely imagined having Sevika help me when I'm struggling with eating. I hope this is to your liking, if there's anything you want me to elaborate on or add please let me know <3

Warnings: ED, Negative body image/self talk, restricting, recovery, there's also a NSFW section (cause it's sevika) that's marked so minors avoid that

I think as much as Sevika would want to help, she’s very headstrong and can come off aggressive in her approach. She may have a hard time understanding your disorder, your triggers, etc. but when she realizes it’s a serious thing that affects you, she’d strive to understand. You'd catch her reading a book about the topic she somehow acquired before bed, reading glasses perched on her nose because she's an old lady.

She’d be very authoritative, which may or may not be a good thing depending on your personality. She wouldn’t push you too hard, but you’re definitely not skipping any meals and she will sit with you all night until you finish the portion you both agreed upon beforehand. She'd be very adamant about making deals/goals with you. This woman is a tough negotiator and is not used to being told 'no.'

If there’s anything she can do to make it easier on you, she will. You like puzzles? Then that’s what you’re both doing while eating your dinner. Board games? Each one has a designated night of the week. If you’re feeling frisky, you can attempt a card game with her. She likes the concentrated pout on your face as you wrack your brain for a winning strategy.

Regardless of what you do, her goal is to take your attention off of clocking how much you eat and to make it less stressful for you through distraction. If you're focusing too hard, then her foot is gonna brush against yours under the table until your game of footsie turns competitive and you're damn near kicking each other.

Because the increased amounts are new for you, you may feel full faster and struggle with eating more, or you may get a belly ache after. Sevika’s coaxing you through it, firm but gentle commands and praises, rubbing your belly after dinner. Her hands are warm and big and do wonders for the cramps.

Sevika will drop by your work with breakfast, lunch, dinner, whatever time of the day it is. If you don’t work, then she expects you to stop by the Last Drop daily and eat with her. She’ll say it’s to spend time with you, and it is, but it also gives her peace of mind to know you’re taking care of yourself.

If you have a hard time eating in front of others, no worries. She’ll get you a private booth if you’re out in public. If you still feel shy eating with her, she’ll avoid staring at you and instead look at her plate, the wall, her arm and talk about whatever she needs to talk about.

If you can’t get yourself to eat a snack, she wouldn’t force you or guilt you into it. She has a plethora of other options to offer you and she'd tell you that one bad day isn't failure, it's just a rest. She'd be incredibly understanding about how taxing it can be for you.

Sevika would refrain from commenting on your appearance when you do start gaining weight. She doesn’t want you to misinterpret her words (healthier, better) and affect your progress. Her joy and relief of seeing your results would be shown in the form of showering you with kisses and keeping you in bed all day.

She will shut down your apologies and concerns of annoying her. She’ll tell you that she’s here, and she’s not going anywhere, and to wipe that smile off your face.

Lovey-dovey Sevika is rare, but she will express her pride in her own way. Any kind of reassuring praise isn't spoken to your face but into your skin as she kisses it.

“You’re doin’ good.”

“Proud of you, babe.”

“I know it’s not easy, thanks for letting me help.”

Since you’re being vulnerable with her, she would be vulnerable with you too. She’d teach you how to tinker with her arm and how to take care of it. If she has a night time routine of taking off her arm and massaging lotion into her scarred shoulder, that will be your responsibility.

If she catches you criticizing yourself in the mirror, she’s going to ask you to point out and explain every flaw you think you see. Then she’s going to show you how wrong you are about each one.

“Hey, hot stuff.” A pair of mismatched arms wrap around your waist, blocking your view of the cellulite and myriad of stretch marks on your stomach. You attempt a smile at her effort to make you feel wanted. “Hey.” Her eyes see right through your feigned nonchalance. “What are you looking at?” “Me.” The word comes out a bit more bitter than you intended. A hum reverberates through your back, hands shifting to splay across your hips.  “And what do you see?” Your eyes meet in the mirror and you examine her face for any sign of sarcasm. A dark eyebrow quirks at the lack of response, fingers drumming against your navel in a silent, ‘I can wait.’ It would do you good to just get this over with, you surmise, and sag into her hold. “Okay, where do I begin,” Your self-deprecating tone doesn’t sit well with her, if her scowl is anything to go by. A colorless mark is traced by your finger until she wraps your hand around hers. “Show me. I want to know exactly what you’re talking about.” Heat rises to your cheeks under her intense gaze and your eyes fail to remain on hers. With her hand in yours, you trace her finger over a few of your stretch marks. “These.” “And what are those?” Ugly.  “Stretch marks.” Like she’d let you off that easy. “And what do you think about them?” Silence fills the room for several beats, and then, “I don’t like them,” You start delving into your darkest thoughts, voicing what you find disgusting about yourself, what you could change, guiding her hand to every insecurity and unloading the festering guilt onto her as she caresses each one. When you finish, you’re crying. Suddenly you’re facing her and she’s wiping away your tears, ever so silent as she patiently waits for you to stop. Once the tears seize, she’s kissing your nose. “Okay. Want to know what I see?” “Not really.” You choke out a tearful laugh. The corner of her mouth quirks up in a sad little smile. “I think you’re gonna want to hear this.” Soon she has you in her lap, unable to tear your gaze from the mirror as she justifies every little imperfection. “These,” Feather light touches ghosted over the multitude of marks, pouring nothing but love into each caress. “Show how far you’ve come. Your strength and your progress. They remind me of how proud I am of you, and how we got through this together.” Sevika punctuates her statement with a kiss to your shoulder before giving you a sidelong glance, as if she needed to ensure you were truly recognizing the weight of her words. “You’re so sexy your skin struggles to contain it, your overwhelming beauty.” A snort cuts through her sappy words and you slap her shoulder. One of her rare, beautiful big smiles adorns her face as she noses against your cheek, holding you as you shake with laughter. “You’re so fucking cheesy.”

NSFW

This would lead to her taking her fill of you. I’m not sure if worshiping would be the right word to use if a great deal of it is beneficial to her, too. She’d make you compliment yourself as she does it. If the praises stop, she stops.

"Um-I, I'm doing well with my meal plans, uh, oh," "Focus." A seemingly impossible task if she keeps swirling her tongue like that. "You-you're so proud of me. I'm-I'm strong for- gods." "For?" "For getting this far. Sevika." You feel the curl of her lips against you. "Keep 'em coming."

Whenever you finish a goal or even just a meal, she may reward you by getting you off. If you have stomach aches, orgasms can relieve cramps so that's what she's going to distract you with.

[sunflowershouto]

if they hurt your feelings - headcanon (iwaizumi, oikawa)

𝐚/𝐧: here's some headcanons! lemme know if you want a part 2 with different/more characters cause these were super fun -leo

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: hurt/comfort, angst to fluff, no warnings other than the boys accidentally being buttfaces

my haikyuu masterlist

𝐈𝐖𝐀𝐈𝐙𝐔𝐌𝐈

✰ Iwa is a fairly blunt person who doesn't mince words.

✰ That's not to say that he doesn't have a filter, but if he thinks something needs to be said, then he's going to say it.

✰ You were discussing plans for what to do after highschool, and Hajime said something that implied that he thought you were being naive.

✰ "You need to be more realistic about your plans for the future. Not everything is a fairy tale like you think it is."

✰ You understood his point, but the way that he said it was undeniably hurtful, and you reacted negatively almost immediately.

✰ You've always been worried that he sees you as being immature, and this really struck a nerve. After all, Iwa has always been calm and collected when it comes to making plans, he always seems to have it together.

✰ All of those little insecurities start to bubble up, and before you know it, there's a lump in your throat and your eyes are watering.

✰ The second you start to reply, and he hears the way your voice breaks, Hajime realizes that he's screwed up.

✰ "I-I know I'm not as good at this stuff as you are, Haji, but I'm not- I'm not an idiot. I just wanted to be optimistic."

✰ Hearing you say that breaks his heart a little bit.

✰ "Hey, hey, don't cry," he mumbles, and brings up a hand to the side of your face. He feels absolutely awful—all he wants to do is help you and make sure you're prepared, and instead he's made you feel like he doesn't trust your judgement. "I didn't mean that, not the way that I said it."

✰ He's stroking your cheek and trying to stay calm, but he's sort of panicking on the inside, because he can tell that there's something deeper that he's struck on and he doesn't know how to approach it.

✰ "I know how hard you're trying, baby. I know you're taking your future seriously, and I don't think badly of you for being optimistic. I'm sorry, I just want things to go well for you."

✰ He's just as straightforward about comforting you as he is about everything else, and that really helps.

✰ When he sees that your eyes are still watering, he pulls you to his chest and holds you tight. He presses his lips to your forehead and holds you there for a moment.

✰ You're starting to feel better as he addresses some of the root of the problem, and you sink further into his hold. Iwa always gives the best hugs, and it's hard not to feel better when he's holding you so lovingly.

✰ "I'm so sorry if I've ever made you feel like I don't believe in you," he murmurs. You can tell in his voice that guilt is eating him alive.

✰ The two of you stand there like that, with Hajime holding you and whispering reassurances, and just trying to fix any damage he might have just done.

✰ In the aftermath of it happening, he'd be a little extra sweet, take you on a nice date and just try to make up for it, and give you more reminders of how amazing he thinks you are.

✰ He's extra affectionate that evening too, and holds you close as you both fall asleep, as if he's still trying to apologize in his own way.

✰ Long term though, I see him wanting to have another discussion about why you might have those insecurities, because the idea of you thinking that he sees you as anything less that brilliant kills him a little inside.

✰ He loves you so much, and going forward he's much more careful of how he says things, and you guys have a much healthier, much more communicative relationship.

𝐎𝐈𝐊𝐀𝐖𝐀

✰ As much as we all love him, it's no secret that Tooru can be a little bit of a dick sometimes, even to people he cares about, and even when he doesn't mean to.

✰ He's really good at reading people on the court, but sometimes misses things when it comes to other people's emotions, especially subtle things.

✰ It's not that he doesn't care, but Oikawa is a hard worker who gets really caught up in his own routines and goals, which means he doesn't always stop and think about someone else's perspective.

✰ It happens over something that he sees as small, but something much more meaningful to you.

✰ You'd stayed up late preparing food last night, knowing that Tooru had an interview with a professional team the next day. You put a lot of effort into preparing a meal for him, wanting to give him a little extra motivation and support, even if you couldn't be there with him in person.

✰ It was a lot of cooking, but more than that, it was something that you had poured a lot of love into, and you were really proud to give it to him the next morning.

✰ "Sweetheart, I made you a bento last night to take with you; it's got all your favorites in it!"

✰ Tooru is shuffling around the apartment, finding his coat, keys, wallet, making sure he has everything he needs with him. He's preoccupied, and doesn't really stop to process what you've said.

✰ "That's okay, babe. I'm gonna eat out today," he calls as he gets to the front door. "I'll be home for dinner, love~!"

✰ And just like that, you hear the door shut, and Tooru is gone.

✰ You try not to feel too defeated, but the longer you stare at the tupperware on the counter and replay Oikawa's careless response in your head, the more frustrated you become.

✰ You'd stayed up all night just to make a stupid meal for him, and he didn't even say 'thank you' or 'sorry' for turning it down. Hell, you'd barely even gotten a goodbye out of him.

✰ You headed to work and tried to carry on with your day, trying to tell yourself not to overreact or be selfish. After all, it was a big day for him, and you were worrying about a stupid lunchbox.

✰ Trying to get over what had happened, you send Tooru a text at around lunchtime.

✰ hi love, how's it going so far?

✰ He didn't open it right away, but you assumed he was just busy, and didn't think anything of it.

✰ You finished your shift, and when you checked your phone. . . Nothing.

✰ Tooru was busy, yes, but he normally always found time to text you back. In fact, it was usually him blowing up your phone while you were at work.

✰ You just sighed and headed back to the apartment and decided to wait for him.

✰ By the time he got back, his dinner was cold and you had already eaten, and were now sitting on the sofa, watching reruns on TV.

✰ "There's my girl!" he chirps like nothing's the matter, and stops dead in his tracks when you cast him a cold stare over your shoulder before looking back at the TV.

✰ "Oh..." He sets his things down on the table and rubs the back of his neck, unsure of what to do. "I did something, didn't I?"

✰ "You think so?" you mutter, though you can't help but feel like you're reacting a bit too harshly. But even when the anger subsides, the hurt is still leftover, simmering.

✰ He slowly sits down next to you, and pokes your cheek, knowing full well that you're not in the mood. "C'mon," he chides, his voice light and playful even though he's clearly worried. "Are you gonna keep pouting or are you gonna tell me what's the matter?"

✰ You resist for a moment, but melt as he continues to stare at you. Finally, you groan and turn to face him. "This morning, Tooru. I spent hours last night making you that lunch, and you didn't even care. You barely said goodbye, and you didn't tell me you'd be home late tonight, either."

✰ "Ah... Crap."

✰ He's quiet for a minute, and you're not sure what he's thinking, and then you realize that he looks like he's about to cry. He starts apologizing profusely, and pulls you into a hug so tight that you think your lungs might have deflated.

✰ "I promise I'll eat everything you cook for the next million billion years! And I'll say goodbye to you every morning for the rest of forever!"

✰ You can't help but smile now. "Tooru, I don't think we'll be alive that lon-"

✰ "Don't say that! The rest of forever! Goodbye kisses!"

✰ Oikawa is nothing if not theatrical, but the emotion is genuine, and you're reminded why you love him so much.

✰ The rest of the night he might as well be glued to you because he literally does not leave your side. You're loading the dishwasher and he's hanging off of you like a giant whiny koala and kissing all over your face.

✰ And you know what, you love it :,)

[awideplace]

do you live a healthy lifestyle? if so, how do you maintain it?

i find this to be one of my biggest life struggles. i feel like i always want to lose weight and get in shape, but always fail to do so. i’ve tried and tried again and it’s just been so hard for me to keep the motivation. i’ve invited God into the process and still, i can’t seem to stay focused on my goal. i over eat / eat unhealthy foods, i don’t exercise. i don’t want to live my life as this, but i don’t feel convicted enough i guess to change it

I hear you. I do live a healthy lifestyle I guess, but I think I balance it all out. Do I count calories? No. Do I weigh myself? No. Do I eat fries, pizza, cheeseburgers? Yes. Do I eat salads, vegetable-filled meals, and protein more so? Yes, I think I do.

For me it comes from intrinsic motivation. I want to fit into my clothes, to look "good" (this is subjective), to be healthy, fit, active. I enjoy being more lithe, strong enough to carry heavy things, and not having a guilt hanging over my head in regards to my body. I think we're all going to be relatively unsatisfied at times with our bodies. I don't seek perfection.

I say eat well in the sense of protein, vegetables, healthier versions of carbohydrates, and stay active with a weekly activity I enjoy. For me, it's hiking a few times a week. That works better for my body holistically than going to the gym I've realized.

I eat food I enjoy, I don't deny myself. I also don't buy a lot of "junk" food to have in the home though because I know I'd probably gobble it all up quickly. So I'm mindful what I purchase, but not high-strung about it. There's a balance.

To lose weight I think it's a good idea to not weigh yourself, to be active (get your heart moving - your legs moving - think cardio as opposed to strength training for weight loss, although some strength training can be helpful), to eat what you enjoy in a fair balance and to eat less. I think overall humans nowadays just eat...too...much. We eat too much and we're less active than previous generations. Food is constantly thrown at us it seems, fast food, food advertisements, etc. It's become a hobby (and I love food, too, but it's become less of a eat to live and more of a live to eat mentality). If I need to lose weight, I'd hike consistently (or nature walks) and cut back on how much I eat. Intermittent fasting works well, too. Consult your doctor of course (I have to put that in there because someone will call me on it ; ) but really, just eat less - more protein (even if plant-based), less carb-y foods, and move. Intrinsic motivation can work wonders. I try to maintain my shape because I want to, because I want to look good in and fit into my clothes.