#I'm sorry they got some bad shit happening irl

[turqrambles]

That one fan really does show up every couple of months, posts some of the worst media analysis possible, gets ultra defensive when people critique some of their points, takes the "you're just anti-SJWs who can't handle your blorbos being criticized and also I'm being oppressed for being so much smarter than all of you" route, and leaves.

[oopsallmabari]

....why are the youtube comments so mad lol don't y'all like to have fun. don't we like to have fun here

[lord-radish]

I saw an ask recently abt Sonic Frontiers that was like "omg when is sonic coming out?!!?!?!" and the response was "when he's ready, be respectful"

and as many things have done over the past year and a half, it reminded me of my former best friend whose idea of trying to be supportive was to try and get me to discuss my sexuality, which I never did because I wasn't comfortable with outing myself.

like there was one time when he was like "yeah just like download Tinder or like grindr or whatever", there were other occasions where he just casually dropped that he didn't think I was straight, and he would get frustrated that I wasn't more open with him. And that ask really does sum it up - it wasn't respectful. He didn't respect my boundaries, and he wanted to force the issue because he felt entitled to know. He was upset that I wasn't sharing information with him despite him being my best friend.

I do genuinely think it was coming from a good place, like he wasn't trying to be malicious, but the fact that he kept pushing it when I didn't want to talk about it really bothered me. There was this attitude of like "friends tell each other everything, I don't like that you don't share things with me" - which is valid enough to a point. I did close myself off from him, starting years earlier and then more rapidly towards the end. He's entitled to feeling closed out.

But god, I have shit I want to keep to myself. There are deep, personal, private things that are mine to keep, and nobody is entitled to that. My sexuality is one of those things, and that's information that is absolutely, unabashedly okay for me to keep close to my chest. And to be prodded and questioned, to have people make comments about my sexuality to my face because they feel entitled to that conversation when I don't want it - that shit cuts. I HATE thinking about it.

Quick sidenote, if you're reading this David, you can go and fuck yourself a thousand times over. I'll never forgive you for eight years of shit like this that made me uncomfortable.

Anyway this post has been weighing heavily on my mind for a couple weeks now. And it all dropped from a comedy ask about Sonic the Hedgehog. Be respectful of other people's privacy, and if you speculate about that aspect of them, keep it to yourself and give them the space, privacy and time to deal with it and come to you IF they feel like it. Not WHEN, IF. If they don't tell you, it's none of your business. Be respectful.

[phagodyke]

ok moment over its all good

oh who am I fucking kidding. I'm not gonna go am I.

[maxzinn]

off topic but also on topic its so clear that the genshin/star rail (saying both cause theres a large overlap) have no capability of thinking.

there are so many fics where *reader* somehow becomes a (sex)slave or is forced to do horrible shit and just general dead dove behavior. the fact that the author used INGAME LORE, CANON BACKSTORY FOR THE CHARACTER proves how braindead so many people are.

like people try to free slaves/captors in media isnt a new thing. theres a lot of art of that angelhusk ship where one gambles for the others freedom (never watched it but its an example)

like having slaves/captors in media isnt new and never has been but the only reason people truely care is because its a hoyoverse game and cant handle anything darker or complex then a PG rating

(sorry anon, I got carried away with this one tee-hee)

YOU'RE SO REAL FOR THIS!!! y'know I was sooo confused when people started screaming for blood when the authors are using his IN-GAME LORE in their fics and then claims that the people who enjoyed writing those have "white-knight syndrome" like cmon sjsadhjg you're giving me a fucking stroke.

I'll say it again, wanting to give slave aventurine or someone a better life DOESN'T mean they have "white-knight syndrome" when they have good intentions!!! We were all were crying for him and his tragic past, we all wanted to comfort him, and we at some point also wished for his salvation and the betterment of his life. These people need to stop throwing these "white-knight syndrome" accusations cuz it's definitely not about that. And like you said, it was his IN-GAME LORE. I already expected some authors to write about reader saving him from his slavery and there's nothing wrong with that! Cuz please, don't tell me you won't help the guy out of his abusive owner, let's be fr here.

Like you also said, many have been writing yandere/heavy dark themes about reader being literally SA'd and R'd by said character (do not tell me you guys haven't read all those fics where Aven was our debt collector and in paying our debt, he noncon or manipulated us into sleeping with him 💀) and now they wanna talk about morals?

And please, don't even try bringing up Romania or irl people in here. IT'S A FICTIONAL RACE IN A FICTIONAL STORY. it may be "inspired" like they said, but it's not directly addressing Romania!!

I get their point alright, I truly do. Like I said in my other post, I do not condone the sex slave! aus about aventurine and the master/slave bdsm cuz his story truly hurt me and I'm uncomfortable sexualizing his slavery when I know about his story and what happened to him as a slave. But I won't go as far as to actually send death threats to those authors and act like a hypocrite💀 people can write what they want to write and I don't have to read those writings if I don't wanna.

Just to say, I'm a yandere/dark-content enjoyer as well, it's just that I draw the line when it comes to aventurine cuz I just wanna cuddle and dote on that man and give him all the love and affection in the world. but like I said, am no hypocrite as well. (sorry if I can't explain it very well but I hope you get the gist of it)

It's just funny and baffling how people are like "eww this person wrote a fic about reader buying slave aventurine so they can be a good owner to him".... this is leaving me speechless how they turned an act with good intentions into something malicious... that poor author doesn't even have bad intentions when writing that fic.

When you apply their logic, it's like saying "this person adopted an abused child so that they can be a good parent to that child, disgusting" do they even realize how stupid they sound??? 😭

[sagasolejma]

HOLY SHIT I ACTUALLY MALE-FAILED TODAY AND GOT GENDERED CORRECTLY FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE, I WAS LITERALLY CRYING OUT OF HAPPINESS

I SOMEHOW MALE-FAILED WHILE WEARING CARGO PANTS, A JACKET, A TERRIBLE MASCULINE HAIRCUT AND MASCULINE GLASSES. I'M STILL NOT EVEN SURE I BELIEVE IT REALLY HAPPENED, IT HAPPENED SEVEN HOURS AGO AND I STILL HAVE BUTTERFLIES IN MY STOMACH, ITS THE FIRST TIME I'VE EVER BEEN GENDERED CORRECTLY IN MY LIFE.

So yeah I had to return some pants that didn't fit me to a clothing store, and the cashier apparently had some trouble with it so she had to call up two of her co-workers. Now the first cashier probably thought I was male since I spoke to her (I haven't voice trained a lot and even then I just use my natal male voice as I was sure I didn't pass) but when the two other workers came to help I didn't say anything. Suddenly they began to talk and started saying stuff like "does she still have the receipt?" and "did she want to buy these clothes? Ohhhh she wanted to return them"

(for context we don't use sir or ma'am in Denmark so the only way to tell what gender people think you are is if you overhear them talking about you, which basically never happens, so I always assume everyone genders me male, but I guess now I'm not so sure haha)

They said stuff along those lines multiple times always gendering me female, I was glancing back at my friend who was behind me like "HOLY SHIT DID YOU ALSO HEAR THAT??!!?!!" and like honestly I don't think I've ever been as happy in my life as a I was in that moment. I didn't have a lot of doubts about my gender, but the ones I have got obligated cause holy shit it just felt so *right.* It felt so natural. Like this is how I am meant to be referred to. It felt like, for the first time in my life, someone was actually seeing *me.*

It also couldn't have happened at a better time honestly... Just two days ago I was crying my eyes out because I thought I would never, ever be recognised as a woman. Recently my dysphoria and outlook on my future has been extremely bad. I got diagnosed with crippling body dysmorphic disorder a few days ago too. There's been moments where I even thought about giving up on being trans, because I felt like no matter what I did, I probably would never be able to lead the life I want to live. People, both on Reddit and irl, have been telling me for a while now that I look more feminine than I believe myself, but I've always excused it by telling myself they're just being nice to not hurt me, but I guess I can't really excuse or explain what happened today in any other way. Obviously my first thought was that it was just because of the hair, but I don't even have a feminine haircut at all. Silly brain.

Anyways, I'm genuinely sorry if this sounds like a bragpost, I guess I just really wanted to share this. It's such a stupid little thing, but it has just completely changed my outlook on my life and my possibilities. Up until now I haven't even *tried* presenting fem outside of some pics I've posted on Reddit, since I thought it would be foolish to even do so, and I thought I wouldn't be even close to passing anyways even if I did, but if someone can gender me female while I'm presenting completely masculine, then surely there's gotta be some hope for me in the future once I come out and start presenting fem, right? I want to hope so at least.

Thank you for reading this, I love you all <3

-Saga

[demigod-jack-hearth]

As the original Anon who sent the FIRST ask, I am a male victim of SA, by a woman who has since changed the history by claiming that I SA'd her instead. You calling me a little bitch, multiple times, going into multiple different rp threads to bring it up, and call me a bitch.

I had to leave tumblr for a few weeks.

I was not the second Anon. And even if I were, while I may not have approached in the friendliest way, calling me a bitch for telling you that it's not alright to remove male rape victims

Especially when Circe is a victim of SA, just mot by Odysseus. I agree with some others I've seen. Stop burrying your apology with roleplay, take a few days to think. I'm sorry this is hard on you, but when you use SA as a simple plot line this is what you need to consider.

Look, I don't know whether you really are the first anon like you say you are, but I'm just going to take your word for it and trust you are.

I know I fucked up. I really know that, and I'm sorry that I called you a bitch

I'm not going to try and defend myself.

Like I said in the apology, I know that it isn't enough. I was in a bad place at the time with shitty people, and honestly, I'm still in a bad place (although that might change soon)

Don't take this as me making excuses, because I'm not trying to, and I'm sorry if it seems that way.

But yes, although I was being influenced by shit people, those were still my actions and words that I wrote. There is no excuse for that. There is no excuse for what I did and how I initially handled the situation.

If I could take it all back and start from the beginning, I would. Not because it would prevent backlash, but because it would mean that I would be able to stop myself from making a stupid and idiotic decision

I also know that no matter what I do, no apology will be enough to rectify what I've done. And I know there is no 'forgive and forget' in this situation, and although on one hand I do want forgiveness from people who were affected. I know and completely understand that I don't deserve forgiveness from anyone no matter what I do.

At this point, I've made a formal apology and I've done what I can to rectify what I've done. So there's not much else I can do except receive what I deserve.

Your other point, that I'm "burying my apology in role play" I'm not trying to do that. But for me, roleplay is an escape from my irl life. I'm in a situation where, sometimes, I don't feel that I'm safe from myself.

I know that sounds like another excuse, but it's not, it's just the truth.

I know I need help. I've been told that by several people (friends and people I'm close with) but for me, that's something that's very difficult to receive

Regardless of that. I'm not trying to "bury" the apology. When I began roleplay in early June (I think), it became something that I deeply enjoyed.

However, along with that passion, a problem was created, that I easily became addicted to Tumblr and the roleplaying community. It was not something I did purposely, it just happened.

I've tried several times to try and at least reduce the amount of time that I spend on this app. But every time that I try, I always end up coming back (the most I was able to stop for was 1 day).

I'm completely aware that this is a major issue (and writing it down makes both it and me sound completely pathetic) it's not something I can easily fix, but to start with I'm going to attempt to roleplay less. I'm not sure how successful it'll be, but I'll try

But I never meant to make it seem like I'm trying to hide the apology. Roleplay is just something I can't stop myself from doing.

I'm not going to talk about the other stuff, based on the reason that I've already addressed this in my main apology/explanation, and I don't want to just repeat myself

Because of how this has been worded, I've got the idea that you are someone that I've interacted with before, so I'm just going to tag everyone.

I'm sorry if you didn't want to be tagged

@zariahthewitch @thegroovydaughterofhestia @if-chaos-was-a-boy @the-gods-strange-children @silena-daughterofaphrodite @fabulousdaughterofhecate @weakest-son-of-sun @chaos-pers0nified @neoptolemus-achilles-son @bast-the-best26 @goddess-of-bubblegum @hispanic-child-of-hermes @gaygirldoodles @luck-is-crucial @reyna4ever @vicious-daughter-of-zeus @feral-hermes-child @oopsies-i-did-a-thing @unfortunate-daughter-of-hestia @that-girl-cupid @ariathemortal @love-lightning-forethought @emdabitchass @kaiaalwayswins @champion-of-revenge @i-was-never-sane @clown-energy-skyrocketing @zoe-aura-of-d3ath @itsyourboyezra @lunar-eklipso-r @pink-koi-lovejoy @that-daughter-of-athena @sleepy-as-a-song @smileyalater @gellyhelio @daughter-ofthe-moontitan @demeters-daughter-is-done @the-smart-and-the-dumb-one @trinket-snatcher @southerndaughterofeos @creature-under-ur-bed @burnt-out-bitxhes @cloak-of-ares @heraaaaaaaa @unproblematic-hestia

[atopvisenyashill]

im gonna finish adwd by the new year dammit

decided to start with davos chapters because FOR ME a davos chapter never misses (yall just have bad taste, sorry to say). gonna do this more like my got liveblogs, so this will probably be long because it’s all four davos chapters.

tldr of my thoughts on davos' adwd arc is:

davos is the common folk's superhero

manderly is RIGHT why is everyone discounting him as a loyal northerner when THEY MURDERED HIS SON MY GOD these people are asking to get baked into a pie

i am so so curious about the manderly family dynamics. i desperately want a longer and more intimate peek into that family!

wex pyke is iconic!!!!!

He had a sort of webbing between the three middle fingers of his right hand. Davos had heard that some of the lords of the Three Sisters had webbed hands and feet, but he had always put that down as just another sailor’s story.

love little details like this that really ground this story as a fantasy world!! just a trio of islands with people who still got webbing in their hands!!! i know this happens irl but usually that less "webbing between fingers" and more "fingers fused together" type thing - these people just have like, mermaid hands!

Those fingers do not lie. You are the onion knight.

they say this like he's batman omg THE COMMON PEOPLE'S HERO THE ONION KNIGHT

The galleys Oledo and Old Mother’s Son had been driven onto the rocks of Skagos, the isle of unicorns and cannibals where even the Blind Bastard had feared to land

RICKON AND SKAGOS MENTION

Part 30 in the epic love triangle of Salla, Stannis, and Davos, where Sallador begs Davos to come south with him and Davos refuses, going on his fool's errand to help win the North to Stannis' cause. Truly, whom else is giving me gay middle aged drama like this.

SISTER'S STEW. Damn I'm very hungry right now too.

The Manderlys are no northmen, not down deep.

CAREFUL MAN. I ENJOY YOU BUT BE CAREFUL SHIT TALKING THE MANDERLYS LIKE THIS.

It's funny that they say the Manderlys only came to the North "900 years ago" but you wouldn't say that Dorne isn't part Rhoynish just because the Rhoynar only came 1000 years ago. Like a hundred years isn't that much of a difference to discount the loyalty the Manderlys may have to the Starks!

The fisherman drowned, but his daughter got Stark to the Sisters before the boat went down. They say he left her with a bag of silver and a bastard in her belly. Jon Snow, she named him, after Arryn.

JON SNOW BABY THEORY. I know it's not true but I do wonder what happened to the fisherman's daughter that helped him. Did she have a bastard of someone else's? Was it just a rumor and her identity has long been forgotten, if she ever hears rumors about who jon’s mother is, what she thinks of them.

In this world only winter is certain. We may lose our heads it's true...but what if we prevail?

fuck i love ned so much

next chapter starts with a little tour of White Harbor, which is fun, getting to see a lot of the war refugees (bet Wyman feels stupid as fuck for leaving Lady Hornwood to die and not helping her escape Ramsay when he had the chance, Wyman you fucking jag off), then Davos just broods alone like "what am i meant for" FOR BEING A KING'S HAND YOU'RE JUST SERVING THE WRONG KING RIGHT NOW IT'S FINE YOUR KING IS STILL TURNING INTO A TREE BUT HE'LL BE BACK SOON

a slave revolt was raging in the east

DANYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

it’s interesting how “the last targaryen hatched dragons” and “there’s been several slave revolts” aren’t always connected as stories. probably just a comment on how slow news travels and how long the game of telephone going on is. i also love how when the men are talking about the targaryens that were in robert’s rebellion, a woman speaks up to be like “there was a girl too wasn’t there” AND she knows all about daena the defiant, very cute to me.

Robett Glover was in the city and had been trying to raise men, with little success. Lord Manderly had turned a deaf ear to his pleas. The Ryswells and the Dustins had surprised the ironmen on the Fever River and put their longships to the torch. And now the Bastard of Bolton was riding south with Hother Umber to join them for an attack on Moat Cailin. Some Hornwood men have joined them, and Cerwyns too. Ser Wylis, though, he's still a captive

just tracking northmen movements here

i love that the sloe eyed maid shows up all the way back in acok in a dany chapter, then we get to see what happened to it in a davos chapter all the way in adwd. once again, makes the world feel so connected, and the fact that it's davos, who understands the very specific pain of taking the risk to sail all the way to the east, only to die being tricked by a light in the Sisters......it's so good.

The knight wore silver armor, his greaves and gauntlet inlaid with niello to suggest flowing fronds of seaweed. The helm beneath his arm was the head of the merling king, with a crown of mother-of-pearl and a jutting beard of jet and jade.

the fact that the northerners never got any fit as sexy as they do in the books.....d&d when i catch you in these streets!!!

i forgot how infuriating that "robb actually killed all his own men by turning into a wolf" story is omg, the freys do have one thing and that's the AUDACITY because JEEZ the way they just keep going and going when even davos who doesn't know these people is like "hmmm wyman looks a little pissed off"

i am curious.....idk......robb turned into a wolf and murdered all his own men......sansa killed the king then turned into a bat and flew away...........am i cooking here?

i'm so interested in whether wynafryd is treated as heir apparent by wyman. wyman says she’s in on the plan, yet neither her sister nor mother are. this feels like a HUGE responsibility and secret he’s shared with her.

Davos asking for a book so he can keep at his reading...my heart...the little librarian in me started crying omg

king hon stark name drop…..the wolf den raised to defend against raiders….

I rose up from flea bottom to be a king’s hand and I learned how to read and write.

i’m sorry…..i’m crying again…..he learned how to read and write, on part with being the hand of the king….slight personal story but my great uncle dropped out of school in 6th grade to sell newspapers (he wasn’t a newsie, his dad has a truck, they did it together, which sounds slightly less like a dickens novel) but anyways he had very poor reading and writing skills and idk it’s just always something that gets to me about davos, that the reading is what he holds so dear, as dear as stannis’ favor!

PICTURE ME SCREAMING “ROBBEEEEEEEEEEEETT” AND RIPPING MY SHIRT OFF. NORTHERN POLITICS LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

i had to calm down i was so excited i was doing that thing where your eyes keep jumping down the page so you’re mixing up you’re reading.

They crossed the castle’s godswood, where the heart tree had grown so huge and tangled that it had choked out all the oaks and elms and birch and sent its thick, pale limbs crashing through the walls and windows that looked down on it. Its roots were as thick around as a man’s waist, its trunk so wide that the face carved into it looked fat and angry.

britney_yeah.gif

What Did I Just Say Up There. So stupid to think Wyman isn’t just as Northern as the rest of them. If we wanna start getting tacky with it, Wyman is so ready to get tacky with it. Sorry to Freys & Lannisters but I think the pies is a cooler war crime!

“PORRIDGE FOR THE DEAD MAN.” Garth the gaoler is a comedian actually omg promote him to court jester!!

The north remembers, Lord Davos. The north remembers, and the mummer’s farce is almost done. My son is home.

Wex is soooooo fucking funny, like setting Theon up to feel up his own sister on Pyke & being way too pleased about it, then being the first to join up for Theon’s last stand and forcing a bunch of proud old dudes to die for that idiot but managing to survive by hiding literally inside the Weirwood, and then over dramatically throwing a dagger at the island of skagos on a map to show Davos where Rickon is. This kid is funnier than most adults i know lmao, Wex Pyke you’re an icon.

[zorlok-if]

Hi everybody,

It's been a while. Sorry that I've been gone so long without explanation or communication, I've been in a bad place. For more info check under the cut. Otherwise, hello! I'm alive and so is this project. Progress has been stalled and will continue to be stalled because this is a hobby and I have to focus on priorities. That doesn't mean that it's dead. I still intend to release everything when I can. I appreciate your support and interest.

Hope you're all well! 😊

Albie

(cw: discussion of bad mental health, anxiety, and depression; school shooting mention)

Okay, hello! Welcome to the rest of this post.

Basically, I've been in a bad mental place for a long time and have a lot of issues that I've left unaddressed or festering—most of which tie back to depression, anxiety, fear, and self-loathing.

To start, I wasn't able to graduate this past winter because I fell one class short of my requirements. That really sent me into a spiral and put a strain on my interpersonal relationships.

Then I tried to take that last class this spring but fear related to recent school shootings exacerbated and activated some bad ND habits and I won't be able to complete this course. That means I still won't be able to graduate until I find some online equivalent or professor who will allow me to remain fully remote.

Around the time I found out I wouldn't be graduating, I also got some really cruel anon hate which added onto how I was already feeling and made me hesitant to put anything else out online.

Other things have happened: family stuff, work stuff, health stuff, sociopolitical stuff, etc. (I don't want to go into details with some and won't burden you with the rest). But, essentially, I found myself at a darker place than normal. I withdrew into myself and have been stewing in crippling self-loathing while wearing a convincing smile in my everyday life. (being really honest with this stuff so that if anyone else is going through/experienced something like this they can know they're not alone)

Fortunately, I was able to get away for a bit and spent some time with loved ones I rarely get to see. I've also made a few irl friends recently and feel like I'm coming back out of my shell and starting to heal after traumatic events and relationships. For the first time in a long time, I feel invigorated. I mean, I still feel like stinking trash, but garbage with a will to live and better itself.

As of right now, I'm moving out and finding more work so I can better support myself financially.

If you've read all this going, where's the Zorlok/(other game) update? Here you go: I've been working on Zorlok somewhat, but in the situation/place where I was at, found myself unable to justify dedicating a lot of time to writing and struggling to feel confident about what I was creating when I actually did sit down to do so. This project is in no way dead and I want to work on it and release games more than anything, but I owe it to myself and other people in my life to keep my priorities in check.

This is a hobby and in the past I dedicated time to it when I should've been doing other things. As long as this is a hobby, I can no longer take time away from my priorities to do something I just want to do (no matter how badly I want to do it). So, that's where we're at. I'm continuing to focus on critical things and stop feeling like a jerk for doing that. I know that this might disappoint some people, but that's how things are right now.

If you want to know more about where things are literally at: I'm close to finishing a heavily updated and expanded prologue but episode one has been undergoing changes. I feel pretty shit about myself and that's seeped into my view on what I create which is in turn stalling my ability to make meaningful progress that I don't immediately want to destroy. I've worked on potential Patreon content (including an exclusive game and a Creating Goncharov director's cut), made a Twine template and tutorial, and made progress on updates for Mousetrap and System Processing. I've avoided making changes to the Zorlok page (and my other itch.io pages) these past few months since I don't want people getting their hopes up seeing some sort of "update" from itch.io—only for that update to be "there's no game update yet." That's why those are still out of date, but I'll be fixing them as soon as I can.

So, that's where we are. I wish that I had way more to talk about and release, but that's not been a possibility and I'm just going to be upfront and honest—even if I am disappointed and somewhat afraid and ashamed to admit it. (that's it for the game updates, the rest just gets back to personal)

In general, I've always struggled with shame and fear and those are the main culprits for why I've been radio silent until now. I couldn't find a way to address these topics or talk about them without my odious inner critic getting triggered and shutting me down. However, I'm trying my best to not listen to that asshole because this (*gestures at everything*) must stop.

To be honest, I'm not content with prolonged existence anymore. I want to live—and that's more than I've been able to say for a long time. To be perfectly honest, for the past decade or so I've lived simply because others wanted me around, not because I wanted to be here. I'm tired of being tired. I'm tired of indifference being my best hope for how I feel about myself. I'm tired of forcing an apathetic soul to drag my flesh through the muck of living. I don't expect what I experience to improve, in fact things will definitely be getting tougher, but I want to change how I experience it. I want to actively live rather than passively slip by. I want to answer questions like "what do you want to do with your life?" and "what are your plans?" with more than vague shrugs and dead-hearted replies meant to brush people off the topic of the future. I want to stop passing through life as a ghost.

I'm still trying to find the motivation, purpose, or courage to genuinely live for myself instead of existing for other people. I still haven't found my "spark"—that properly and blissfully selfish reason to live—but I think wanting to search is a good start.

Anyways, I'll be around more and I'll be more honest with where I am and what's going on. It's my personal mission to deny fear's control over my life and actions. Part of that means allowing myself to be more open with people even if I'm afraid of judgment or negativity.

Excluding a few outliers, you've all been exceptionally kind and encouraging. I'm always overwhelmed and astonished with the support that's been shown to me and my creative projects and I appreciate you all. Thank you so much. Thank you for reading through this. Thank you for caring. You're part of why I'm around.

I hope that you're having a lovely day/night/et cetera and if you aren't, you're not alone ❤️.

I'll see you around. 😊 Thanks again,

Albie

[etinceelle]

Thank you for the kind words I got in dms and in my asks (as non anonymous 🫂), I really appreciate it

I'm sorry these kind of things happen so often, and I know I apologize when I'm not even responsible for it but I just feel like itns such a shame there's problems with ships so often. I don't want to sound like a whining kid but I often feel sad that at first it was just about enjoying the story of RWBY and my obsession for NND because that's the only ship I truly love and actively enjoy creating fanarts for. I like to open my mind and try to be curious on other dynamics, characters, and I'm happy to answer to people when they ask questions, and that's it. I just don't get why it comes to that with so much peoplr creating shit and dramas around ships for all various and possible reasons. I just want to go back to the time I just enjoyed drawing the story for my own enjoyment

I just wish people could be kinder in general in communities. It's supposed to be fun but it's not. We might have hard time irl in our lives and fans reuniting for something they love should be better than this. It's also sad to notice how some regions in the world light think differently because of culture or just express things not the same way as others, and there will be misunderstandings and tensions because of that. I can't believe now harassment and violence is normalized so much online that it has to go like this.

You might find that reaction as a "lot" maybe but it's just so much to deal with these kind of problems online and in groups SO often. Can't we just chill and have a good time ?

I had a bad day for various reasons, I'm glad at least I streamed tonight because it made me feel better ❤️

[carakook]

Hi 🥲

So.... remember how I said I'd be back before? Lol, well right after that post some shit happened and it honestly made me not even want to open tumblr anymore. I won't go into deep detail of course, because I wish nothing for the best for these people. However I had some friends that were not actually friends, and some of them took things too far within our friend group. Long story short, I lost a good chunk of the friends I previously mentioned in my post, and some of them knew about my tumblr account (even though I did not give it out freely, they just found it and shared it with each other) and they were sending me asks pretty much making fun of me. Mocking my writing and my love for BTS in general. I also was sent screen shots of them talking badly about my writing, and it really just made me feel insecure, angry, and sad. This isn't everything that happened of course, but it is the reason I have not posted or even been on tumblr in months. It's immature really, I'm 26 years old, and don't have time to be dealing with bullshit like that. But, I do suffer from mental health issues (I'm sure you guys could tell, huh? ADHD and Anxiety gang wya?) and anxiety is a big thing for me. This entire situation really messed with me, but made my anxiety flare up horribly. So when this started happening, I got really bad anxiety about posting and interacting on tumblr in general. I had a lot of irl stuff going on too, and it felt like my safe space to be creative and cope with that shit was intruded on. All of this is to say that I'm sorry I didn't come back when I said I would, literally the week I was going to finish Bloom, this happened. A lot of stuff came to light, and then my tumblr asks were invaded, and I just felt burnt out and lost my spark. But I do wanna say thank you to J and K for being such good friends to me throughout all of this, they have been encouraging me to pick up my story and even make new ones. I love them a lot, they are probably some of the best friends I have ever had and they have been so helpful throughout all of this. The good news is, I am feeling a lot better about it all now. We have all moved on, and my anxiety is gone because I got over it. Just don't care anymore really. I'm more at peace. So I think I am ready to come back! I also wanna thank the author of Mutual Help, @personasintro, I don't know her personally but she recently uploaded a new chapter of Mutual Help (if you have not read it, and you are a Jungkook lover, GO READ IT??? IT IS LITERALLY ONE OF MY FAV FF EVER.) and that heavily got me in the mood to write again. Her writing is beautiful, and she always inspires me. So thank you Mimi for being as amazing as you are. <3 I am sorry again for being gone so long, but I want to come back. I love writing and I love BTS, other groups too, and I really love being delulu and turning it into little stories. So I hope you can all welcome me back and get excited. I won't give a timeframe yet, but I will be uploading the new chapter of Bloom very soon. Might have some smaller stories posted while I work on Bloom and refresh my brain. I have some work stuff I need to catch up on, and then my focus will be on Bloom. In the meantime, how are you all doing? Are you eating well?? Getting rest? Anything new? Taking care of yourselves? I'd love to hear. I have really missed you all so much, and god I have missed tumblr. It took a lot for me to open the app recently, but after I finally did, I realized everything is ok. To those who have waited for me patiently, thank you so much, I love you more than you understand. I can't wait to start again! I have a lot of stuff planned for the future, and I still have Metamorphosis to upload. So please bare with me while I get back into the swing of things.

P.S, shoutout to @wearentdelulu, she’s my best friend and has helped me a lot. She’s recently started writing stories on tumblr, please check out her page. She’s an amazing writer. But beyond her writing, she’s a great friend and inspires me to be better every day. She is a big reason I want to come back to you guys, knowing she’s here gives me courage and inspiration, so thank you J. 💖

[mik0is0bored]

Im gonna vent rq so ignore this if you want idc

So yknow how in past posts I've said my mom is rude to me (telling me to go to hell is one of the many things she's said) and is nicer to everyone in my family? So yeah basically this all happened not even five minutes ago and basically I say "mom i think I have insomnia and depression can you try and schedule an appointment with my doctor" and she starts saying "no you don't need to go to the doctor your fine" and goes off on "you don't try to sleep at night you stay up and read or draw and think about whatever the fuck you want and you don't try to sleep" like last night I stared up at my ceiling or had my eyes closed and I only got four to five hours of sleep. I tried falling asleep. But I couldn't. I fell asleep at 11:30 last night. And then she starts saying "you dont get to defend yourself" and my irl friend let's me vent abt my mom right and so my mom stops talking and says "who are you texting" nd takes my phone before I can even respond and I say "why can't I talk to my friend" saysi explain why I am and she sits there with her mouth open like shocked or whatever and then she has the audacity to say "you don't get to feel emotions" and you do, mom? You get to decide my emotions? You get to tell me how I feel? Cause you dont. You make me feel like the scum of the earth and I don't matter, but you don't get to tell me that my feelings don't matter. She accuses me of yelling, I'm not yelling. I'm loosing my voice cus I was sick and I'm full on crying cus of all this shit like bro now your standing in the doorway of the bathroom apologizing? "Clean the mascara off your face" why? So dad doesn't see I've been crying? Like sorry i don't hate her, but don't fucking tell me my emotions don't matter then tell me to do shit that'll make it seem like shit didn't happen that's fucking unacceptable and it's beyond cruel to treat your fucking kid like that. And we wonder why people have mental illness and their mental health is bad. (Not all cases, but some) have unbelievable parents who tell them all this shit, and it makes them (me included) depressed, anxious, and fucking suicidal. This has nothing to do with it but I'm scared as shit to ask for help. It took me 10 minutes in health class today to ask my instructor "I'm i citing my sources correctly?" Like that should not take someone that long to ask a stupid question. Now I'm asking for therapy (wow I'm asking for help?) And my parents are ignoring the fact I said anything

[away-ward]

im sorry for this rant KO, but why on earth is the bonus content for nightfall is the start of the horsemen? Like omfg. I really dont need it to exist because i like the mystery of them. Why can't we just have a willemmy bonus 😭 i'm so fucking upset. I initially wanted to pre-order the paperback but thinking about that whole alex drama in BC, i didn't, thank the lord for that! But i was still hoping for a willemmy bonus or maybe a will or emmy's back story, but we're getting to see Damon, A-FUCKING-GAIN? How many fucking bonus do we have to see him??! Fuck, i'm so upset, idk who to rant this with because i don't talk about this series to anybody irl.

Excerpt from PD's insta:

DAMON GRABS HIS JACKET OFF THE COURT AND PULLS IT ON AS HE LEAVES.

"YOU OKAY?" MICHAEL ASKS KAI.

BUT KAI JUST GESTURES TO DAMON WHO PUSHES THROUGH THE HEAVY DOUBLE DOORS. "I TOLD YOU, MAN," HE BLURTS OUT TO MICHAEL. "HE'S TROUBLE."

"NO," MICHAEL QUICKLY RETORTS, LOOKING IN THE DIRECTION DAMON LEFT. "HE'S AN ENFORCER, KAI."

HIS FRIEND STARES AT HIM.

"AND EVERY TEAM NEEDS ONE," MICHAEL ADDS, DROPPING THE BASKETBALL INTO KAI'S HANDS. "TELL THE COACH I'LL BE RIGHT BACK."

end-

🥲 ngl, i'm so sick of damon's appearance, at this point not only his character wasn't my fav, pd over-pushing him makes me really hate him now. "He's the enforcer" ughhhh, and when did this branding ever came up in the devil's night series? I only remember this point being discussed here on your blog of your meta about damon's character and his implicit role in their friend group and family. Istg i really never saw his role being discussed and branded like this anywhere, so the only place it could happen was in the private chat's of their pendragon fb group or between PD and their editor/most trusted beta readers. Istg the pettier side of me feels like some of PD's fb group fans saw your discussion posts here with other anons and told on PD, then they got inspired by you ideas about "his role" in the family. Which in theory, i don't see much wrong from it, but truly, where did this role establishment and branding came from? And ofc in PD's fashion, they had to rebrand Damon's role to be positive and borderline inspiring 🙄

and fuck, who cares about logic right? Definitely not PD when they kept on writing A and meaning B in their stories, but kept on being pissed off when readers understood it as A. 🤡

at this point, i'm not even excited anymore for this bonus content. I genuinely thought something good will come out of it, but with their opinion of willemmy a few weeks ago, and now with this. Idk. But I just know and fully sure now that PD just wanted to avoid the alex-aydin-will-emmy qna discussion extra materials, because they knew they fucked that one up, and many readers hated it, and so they probably want to just bury that shit and move past it. So of course, we'll never gonna get a willemmy bonus content. Ugh. I can't fault them for wanting to move on, but for someone who wnats to move on so bad and ignore the uncomfy parts of their own mistake in writing, they sure as hell is still be talking and hinting at this series from time to time especially for their most fav characters 🙄

but fr KO, it really left a sour taste in my mouth when an author behaves like this. Penelope Douglas is just so, ugh, idk. At this point ideky i'm still hoping for them to be better tbh when they've always been known to be problematic, like they're always just so disappointing. I need to detach my feelings for books i like to read with their authors, because i'm just gonna end up upset like this. But it's so hard!!! Especially when they're indies and you like some parts of the things they put out, and can't always find it anywhere else. Ughhh. i heard that series by Monty Jay was giving DN, so i might check it out, and i really hope it's better.

+ when you get a reach of the bonus materials, will you be sharing them here and share your thoughts and opinions about them? I'm a big yapper and i just wanna yap with somebody about it frfr.

Hey. Oh man, I feel your pain.

I really dont need it to exist because i like the mystery of them. Why can't we just have a willemmy bonus

Ohh, I wish I was with you on this but I’m actually excited about it. As someone who wants to understand these characters better, and who absolutely goes bonkers over character origin stories, this is right up my alley. I never expected any kind of Willemmy scene, so maybe I’m not as disappointed as I would be otherwise.

From what I heard, there are some willemmy scenes in this origin story though! So not all hope is lost (although I don’t know how it’s supposed to make sense, since I’ve also heard that this starts during their freshmen year and Emmy’s a year younger so… but whatever. I’m just happy for the moments!)

I am so sorry that this isn’t what you wanted!

Istg the pettier side of me feels like some of PD's fb group fans saw your discussion posts here with other anons and told on PD, then they got inspired by you ideas about "his role" in the family. Which in theory, i don't see much wrong from it, but truly, where did this role establishment and branding came from?

As much as this idea tickles me, the fact is that this was probably written months ago, and I only really had that discussion with in the past few weeks. More than likely, we were just picking up on something PD was implying the entire time.

But I just know and fully sure now that PD just wanted to avoid the alex-aydin-will-emmy qna discussion extra materials, because they knew they fucked that one up, and many readers hated it, and so they probably want to just bury that shit and move past it.

I’m still holding out of that pinterest board and discussion questions (though, it may be a lost cause). It just seems so stupid that they’d withhold those two things since they’re so minor compared to the bonus scene.

they sure as hell is still be talking and hinting at this series from time to time especially for their most fav characters

Coming from a writer’s perspective, it’s hard to let your favs go. Long after the other characters stop “speaking” to you, your favs come back. You still see them doing stuff. And PD is proud of the series, so of course they’re not going to bury it.

But yes, I agree that the fandom has been pretty loud about wanting some more willemmy content for some closure, and it shouldn’t be this hard to sit and think about the characters and deliver something, just to be kind to your readers and fans. I can’t say why PD is so resistant to it, but that’s for them to know.

i heard that series by Monty Jay was giving DN, so i might check it out, and i really hope it's better.

I had to look it up, and I’m assuming you’re speaking about the hollow boys? I haven’t read it, but if you do get around to it, I hope you enjoy it.

Regarding PD, I hardly ever look into the background of an author or give them a second thought. I also have never had the desire to contact an author, or do meet and greets or anything, that’s just me. So, I’ve never had the issue of needing to detach a work from an author, but I can see the struggle.

+ when you get a reach of the bonus materials, will you be sharing them here and share your thoughts and opinions about them? I'm a big yapper and i just wanna yap with somebody about it frfr.

I absolutely will share my thoughts, of course! I might do a reading react, or just a summary of my thoughts, whatever feels right. Again, I feel for your frustration and disappointment. The let down is never easy, but you'll read better books in the future. This isn't the last of it for you. So look forward to finding your next favorite read.

-KO

[libraryspectre]

I want to connect to other LGBT people (particularly other trans people), but I have trauma surrounding the word "queer" and this alone has prevented me from seeking/building community.

For context: I'm in a red state and I've never opened up about being LGBT with anyone other than my girlfriend & family. I don't want to have to tell people about my deeply-personal, traumatic experiences...in order for them to not call me a word I've only ever heard used as an anti-LGBT slur; it's on the same "level" as being called a d*ke, f*g, r*tard, or "freak" to me. It horrifies me to hear it used so casually (especially from cishet allies [?], holy shit), and, because of this, I've never even tried to make LGBT friends. (The whole: "Anyone who hates the word queer is a TERF!" stuff hasn't helped either.)

I say all of this because your post about connecting—for the first time—to others like yourself sounds amazing. I know it would likely help me not feel so alone too. Do you happen to have any advice? If not, no worries.

Hey anon! Sorry if this is a little muddled, I've got a bit of migraine brainfog, but I'm going to do my best to answer.

If I'm understanding this correctly, you're hesitant to seek community because you don't want the label of "queer" to be applied to you, and you're worried that won't be accepted unless you provide an explanation you're not ready to give. Additionally, you're adverse to hearing the word at all. If I've misunderstood, please correct me! And my dms are open if you'd rather talk that way.

So, first, I wanna say that if you're personally uncomfortable with that label, it doesn't make you a bad person or member of the LGBT community. What isn't fair is when people decide that they're uncomfortable with queer as a label, and that means no one else can use it either. But that doesn't seem to be your attitude. And some people do unfairly claim that anyone who is personally uncomfortable with the word must be bigoted, and that's not right either. However, I'm going to gently redirect you on the matter of allies - queer is considered to be reclaimed, and has long been the preferred term for academia and other areas. It is totally fine for allies to say "the queer community" or "queer people." Obviously that doesn't give them the right to use it in a derogatory way, or use it to describe individuals who don't want that label, but general respectful or professional usage is fine.

As for the meat of your question - this is just speaking from my personal experience on a college campus in Texas, so take it with a grain of salt.

I don't think this will be as much of an issue as you're afraid it will be. I've seen the community in both red and blue states, and online, and they're all very different environments. In my PERSONAL experience, irl spaces are less prone to petty squabbling about terminology. Also, LGBT people in red states are better at sticking together than LGBT people in blue states. The difference from Texas to Oregon in how people spoke and acted toward each other for minor intra-community disputes was pretty staggering. I'm not saying it was perfect, but in Texas we were much more willing to overlook difference of opinion or beliefs that needed some examination, because we had to stick together!

I write all this to say that, if you politely tell people "oh, I don't like using that word for myself/i don't identify with that word/please don't call me that" they're pretty likely to accept it without question.

If you have trouble just hearing that word even if it isn't applied to you, or hearing it applied to a group you're apart of (for example, "a bunch of us queers are going to lunch") that may be harder to overcome. I think if you're so uncomfortable with the word that you can't stand to hear it, you'd need to do some work overcoming that discomfort to be comfortable in those spaces. It simply isn't fair to require others to police language they've reclaimed - if they decide to do so to make you more comfortable, that's their choice, but ultimately it is their choice. Unfortunately that's the best advice I have on that. As for the group thing, you can ask people not to apply it to a group you're a part of, but they may not always remember and it may not always be appropriate to use a different term for the group (remember, queer is the most inclusive and equalizing word we could possibly have, which is why it's important.) So I think if you really can't stand that either, you may need to first try to overcome some discomfort. It may help to remember that for many people, queer is as much a political identity as it is a personal one. So in some contexts you can just remind yourself that when they reference queer people, they aren't talking about you, a LGBT person who does not identify as queer.

I think the extent to which any particular community throws around the word queer probably varies wildly, so there's no telling how often you'll even encounter it. It might be a good idea to just try some things out, and if you the word is being used to a level you can't handle, you can leave. You also might have better luck trying to meet individuals rather than joining a group - I'm sure you'll be able to find other individuals who are personally uncomfortable with that word, or willing to avoid it, especially if you're in an area that heavily uses it as a slur.

I don't have any advice with how to become more comfortable with the word itself, because that's not a challenge I had myself (although I do have strong negative associations with the word homosexual). I do have the experience of being a mostly sex-repulsed asexual trying to seek community with queer people. The people I was around talked about sex all the time, and it made me really uncomfortable! But i recognized that it was important they had a space to do that, considering how policed our sexuality is outside our own spaces. And I knew it wasn't fair to insist there'd be no sex talk. So I became closer with people who were more restrained about that kind of thing, and 1-on-1 it was much easier and fairer to say "I'm not comfortable talking about that". And they didn't mind. And in group situations I got more comfortable over time with discussions around sex, just through exposure. I removed myself until the discussion was over if it became a problem, but eventually I was fine most of the time.

That's not a perfectly parallel experience, because I don't have trauma around sex, but I think some of that might be helpful advice. It might also help to read things from people who reclaim queer talk about why they love it as a label, so you can give yourself some exposure to the word being used in neutral and positive connotations. Learning about the history of its reclamation and its importance of it as a term might also be helpful. I wish I had readings to recommend, but I don't. Maybe my followers could chime in?

One more thing - it's great you have a girlfriend to help you with this process. Please lean on each other and ask for all the help you need. You need to be a team. Maybe they can go to things with you and help out if you get overwhelmed, or help you speak up about your boundaries if you have trouble doing so.

That's all I got for you. Sorry this was so long - please remember that you're worth the work it takes to be happy and comfortable and have community. Stay safe and I love you 💜

[morimess]

I just watched The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes and I have to rant about it real quick.

Spoilers under the cut for those who want to see it- I HIGHLY recommend the movie btw.

-So, first off THE MUSIC IS SPECTACULAR. The scene where Lucy Gray is covered in the snakes is *chef's kiss*. Apparently for every song, it was a live performance by Rachel Ziegler, and she fucking nailed it.

I've seen a couple people criticize some of the songs as taking melodies from other IRL folk songs- but honestly, I don't see this as a bad thing as a lot of those original songs have probably been forgotten as this is YEARS in the future. Music evolves, and certain chords and beats will stay long after words are forgotten.

-Her dress is gorgeous- all of the costumes are awesome. I think I made one comment on how the school uniform looks a bit weird, but I quickly got over it.

-Flickerman is actually really funny- I thought he would be annoying as a bit character- but he did get a couple laughs out of me. (Which makes me feel bad because people were dying in those scenes, but at the same time- I think that's a commentary for another time.)

-Arachne's death was absolutely deserved.

-Wovey's death was absolutely tragic

-The drones were *menaces* and I LOVED IT- it was so fucking funny to me to see them flying around and nailing people square in the chest- or knocking people tf over.

-I love how Lucy Gray immediately called bull on Snow's "the third person I killed was my old self."

-THE OLD HOB WAS AWESOME!! The mood in the tavern was so cozy and joyful, and it is EXACTLY what I imagined the Hadestown speakeasy looks like when Persephone is singing "Our Lady of the Underground"

-That being said- I wish we got the scene where they burn it down for being the heart of rebellion.

-I didn't like the change they made to Jessup's rabies. He was supposed to get it while at the capital. That bite was supposed to be after their first night in the zoo, where they thought a rat bit him (later speculated to be a raccoon). I don't like how it was changed to a bat bite while on the train.

The whole point of it in the book was supposed to emphasize the propaganda that's even being forced onto capital citizens- not just district citizens- that the capital is utopian.

"There is no rabies in the capital anymore- we got rid of it within *our* borders. It must have come from those *filthy* districts. Look at how it turns him even more *animalistic.*"

But instead, they change the bite to be from a bat while they were on the train. To me, that seems too close to "the rabies came from the districts." (Even if it was a capital train.)

Like, at the start of the movie, we are treated to an absolute rollercoaster as they try to set up everything that was going wrong in the capital during the war in the span of 5 minutes. One of these being a dog who's foaming at the mouth. I entirely expected that bite to happen within the zoo with that kind of set up.

There could have even been really interesting pay-off for it too. Other students seeing the foaming, freaking out, and almost panicking because "rabies is back." (Hell, even have Flickerman seem spooked by it). SELL HOW DANGEROUS THIS DISEASE IS/ SEEMS TO THEM. Because they lived through it. Most people in the capital probably have a horror story involved with a rabies encounter, because of how rampant it apparently was in the capital.

-The same can also be said about Dill- I don't like how blaise they were about her constant cough, and possible tuberculosis. That shit kills- they would not be casual about being near her. (Though the absolutely would make jokes in her expense)

-Reaper could have been more of a dick. In book, he actually says "I'm sorry I'm going to have to kill you all." (In response Jessup spits in his face- which causes Reaper to ALSO contract rabies, but that's neither here nor there). He honestly isn't too threatening other than a quick jump scare when his mentor is first talking to him.

He's honestly more of a gentle giant? In a way? Like, he pairs with Dill and after she dies, collects all the bodies around the arena in a row and covers them. He isn't the same threat that he was in the books.

-I would have preferred if we went in the arena with a count of how many tributes were left. I think 22 were still alive? But it was really hard to keep track. I know in the book between the rough handling, the Arachne incident, and the bombing- both the mentor and tribute pool slimmed significantly before the games even started. But in the movie I think only 2 tributes actually died before the games.

-As far as that rollercoaster at the beginning- it throws a LOT of information at you all at once- and not all of it is mentioned again. Especially not the cannibalism- which I feel could have been changed a bit?

-We didn't get much about Snow's peers, which is a shame since he has SO MUCH that he thinks about each one of them and their backgrounds in the books.

-Clemensia's poisoning should have been more colorful, and could have been WAY more grotesque. I'm talking a rainbow of mottled skin spreading up her arm until her face swells shut. We also should have gotten confirmation on whether or not she died.

It would have been more satisfying if during Snow's hospitalization, he tried to see her, only to find those golden scales covering her body and turning her eyes yellow like in the book.

-I wish Maude Ivory was more of a character- she's one of the main reasons it's theorized The Hanging Tree and other songs by Lucy Gray are remembered.

-In the book, in that last conversation with the doctor, she tells Snow that she will never replay the footage of the 10th games. There's too much rebellion attached to it. I wish that line has been kept- that way his thoughts of "People will forget her" actually have a bit more weight.

-I wish we had seen more of Sejanus' mom- just to see what costumes would have done with her dresses.

-I wish we saw more of Tigris' designs, or heard more of her struggles with her boss- just a mention of what she had to do to keep the House of Snow on top.

I think that's it for now? I just watched it last night, so some things need a bit longer to be thought about, but in general I just want MORE.

[scaly-freaks]

the fact that some people claim that a sex worker "abused" a prince really shows how far gone this fandom is

they're just mad that she's not the strong\oc they've been shipping aemond with for the past 2 years.

aegon took aemond to that brothel probably because he felt like it was his "duty as a big brother" & just thought it'd be funny. sex at 13 for boys is normal in Westeros. not to mention, viserys and daemon also went to brothels together when they were teens. maybe aegon got the idea from his dad?

but honestly i gave up after seeing daemon stans saying he was right to kill rhae because he's also a "victim" for being forced to marry so young.

anyway, very excited for the next chapter of your fic! i love aegon and amara so much! you said that aegon's entire world will crush around him and i'm so excited for unhinged king aegon!!!!!!!! (hoping that nothing bad will happen to my girl amara <3 )

Look I'm bringing it back to we don't know what happened when Aegon took Aemond to the brothel, we don't know if she raped him, we don't know if he just sat there and refused to be touched, we don't know. And the show was jusssttttt shitty enough to give us a crumb for two years and let everyone create a cemented narrative over it.

And as long as we don't know, I'm hesitant to call her his 'abuser.' I know what abuse feels like, done with malice and over a long period of time to turn me inside out until I was harming myself just to have somewhere to put the rage and misery (I had no irl support at the time). Aemond and the madame's interactions onscreen - any of them - did not give me the same feeling. That is my perspective. I don't give a shit what anyone else has to say about it, because at the end of the day, I live in my own head, I conjure up my own thoughts.

I do think Viserys and Daemon did the same. I still think Aegon is a bit of a twat, but he probably didn't mean to be malicious at the time. If Daemon was right to kill Rhea, Rhea had the same right considering she wasn't that much older when she was forced into the marriage (unless we're now saying Maegor was abused by Ceryse when Visenya was pulling all the strings and Maegor was no ordinary teenager).

Babygirling is fine until people begin to act like experts on a topic that is malleable and subjective and fucking painful for those of us who have survived hell. Like I'm sorry, but keep it moving.

Also, awww thank you :') New chapter coming soon <3

(None of the vitriol in this post was aimed at you btw anon)