#I'm so tired of y'all stealing things

[vole-mon-amour]

Here's the original and its description:

Don't take off at us for the watermark. That is the sole reason we can carry this footage here for it would otherwise be IPR purloined and placed onto multiple other platforms, ruining our opportunity to bring you an exclusive on this rare occurrence from nature!

Surely one of the most fantastic natural history sequences ever recorded in the annals of wildlife filmmaking! This is the FIRST EVER sequence of a wild Snow Leopard actually making a kill on camera, and what fabulous gymnastics and callisthenics to boot!

Do note the behaviour that you might otherwise miss. It allows us to do even more justice to this fascinating footage, especially as it’s been shot in 4K. There is a lot going on here that we don’t notice on first glance - for example, the way the Bharal still has the strength to attempt to pull itself away from the Snow Leopard, just after the first stage of the fall, and the manner in which the dexterous big cat is able to maneuver its body to help it survive. This footage tells us a lot about the two animals in terms of behaviour and physiology. What drama from the Himalaya!

Not exactly another day in the life of a Snow Leopard, but this young female Snow Leopard, while bruised and battered a tad, returned to feed on the Bharal kill and fully recovered to move on, and continue its unique way of life in the high Himalaya. Hopefully, she will have cubs this year, too. We will follow her and let you know of developments in her life...

We pride ourselves in bringing the best of India and South Asia to the world...

Please see the 16 minute long film on the Snow Leopard at this link, for the full story of this incident:

Here's the full.

Have the decency to post the original instead of stealing a filming of such a rare moment.

[silverselfshippingchaos]

r.une is so awesome! he's the kindest guy ever and I always drop by the thieves guild whenever I'm not doing anything just to hear his pretty voice

[meowhara]

Mafia!Miguel O'Hara x Fem Bunny Hybrid!Reader

tw : abuse, mistreatment, usage of bad languages, death, kidnapping

synopsis : In a world where hybrids are becoming a common thing. Scientists sells their experiments for a very high price in auctions, making it possible for anyone with such kind of money to own a hybrid or even more

author's note : OMG! this will be my very first fanfic ever. I hope y'all enjoy this little fanfic I made in such a very short time. I'm so so sorry if there's anything wrong with my grammars or maybe you got confused by how I write things in general. English isn't my first language :)

𝓟𝓪𝓻𝓽 𝓸𝓷𝓮, 𝓟𝓪𝓻𝓽 𝓽𝔀𝓸, 𝓟𝓪𝓻𝓽 𝓽𝓱𝓻𝓮𝓮

Experimenting with human beings are normal by now all around the world, making hybrids one of the most expensive and valuable assets. They're usually sold with a very high price in auctions, anyone who's able to lay a hand on those hybrids must be some very crazy rich and lucky people.

You're those kind of fine breed, sold for an unbelievably high price. But sadly luck wasn't on your side due to how irresponsible your new owner is. He never took care of you like how people should took care of hybrids. He abandoned you, feeding you poorly, using you only for your small and fragile body. Treating you like an animal and make you do his daily chores such as cooking, cleaning, and even doing his laundry. But you never complain, there's nothing you can do and nowhere to escape.

You don't even know how the hell he was able to purchase you from the auction since he doesn't even look like a wealthy man at all. Who's job is only to sell and purchase drugs from here and there then spend shit ton of money for women and other useless things. He woke up late at the day just to hurt you then leave and came back late at night. Sometimes he didn't even bother to come back home, leaving you hungry and lonely inside his small and packed house in the middle of nowhere.

For the past moths he has been stealing drugs from Mafia!Miguel. Miguel tried to track him down for months without any avail and lost him every single time. After learning your owner's pattern for months, he's finally able to caught him off guard.

But the bastard ran back home and hide just before Miguel catch him. Your owner ran back home and locked the doors, telling you to shut the fuck up if anyone come over to look for him and to not tell his whereabouts.

Miguel is one step ahead this time and he's able to track your owner's house. He then banged on the door which made you jumped in surprise. "Open the damn door, you bastard! I know you're inside." He shouted as he kept banging on the door with his men following and standing by behind him, guns in their hands.

Innocently, you walk over the door and open the door slightly ajar and peeked outside just to met his eyes. Miguel was shocked when his eyes met with your big vulnerable eyes and fluffy bunny ears, looking almost as if you're pleading with a small pout on your face. "Yes?" You said shyly with shaky voice. Miguel looks back at his men in confusion then look back at you. "Hello, little one. Is there anyone inside?" He asked, trying to be less intimidating and as friendly as possible in order not to scare you. You hesitated to answer but you shook your head anyway, since it's seems like the only safe answer to give. He examines your beautiful and small figure from head to toe just to find bruises everywhere then to your dirty clothes that you're wearing. You look up at him with tired eyes and flat expression, making you look like a broken doll.

Miguel is not buying your obvious lie. "Are you sure? You look... Tired. Are you okay?" He asked again. You just nod and rush to close the door but Miguel stopped you from doing so. He grabbed on the door and push it back open, making you stumbling back from the force. "Look, I don't want to hurt you. But I need to take a look inside, okay?" He gave signals to his men to search the house for your owner.

He didn't expect you to panic and starts shouting at him "No! Please! Master will get mad." You said as your eyes starts to well in tears, "He'll hit me and lock me up in the basement again..." You said while sobbing and pulling on his sleeve. Miguel can feel his heart breaking into pieces from how adorably you cried in front of him. As he wanted to hug you and calm you down, his men came back and drags your owner with them. He got a black eye on his right eye due to a hard blow given by Miguel's men right on his face when he tried to run away. They throw him on the floor to force him to get on his knees in front of Miguel.

When your eyes met his you ran towards your master in worry. "Master! Are you okay?" You got on your knees to check on him, even if he's a very cruel and irresponsible master you can't help but feel worried of him getting hurt. But instead of getting any answer back from him, he gave you a very hard and strong punch on the face. You stumbled back in shock and whimpers in pain as you cover your face with your palms from the fear and pain. "You useless bitch! I told you not to let them in!" As he's about to hit you again, Miguel stepped forward to protect you and kick that bastard's stomach with full force in anger. He still couldn't believe that a little angle like you would care so much about a devil like him.

He groans in pain from Miguel's kick and Miguel turned to look at you as you bleed from your nose and cry on the floor. Your owner look up at Miguel then at you "Oh I see what this is all about now. You like her don't you? Fine then, take her away as a compensation. She is a very fine and expensive hybrid." He said with a low chuckle as he gave you a dirty look. "Use her as a cock sleeve or just do anything you like at her, let all of your anger out at her as if she's a punching bag. You won't ever hear a peep out of her mouth, she's well trained for that." Miguel can feel himself boiling in anger but his eyes won't leave your figure, no matter how hard he tried. The idea of a pretty thing like you used and abused by someone like him are just too much for him to even imagine.

Yes, he is indeed a cruel mafia leader. He killed and will kill anyone who got in his way without any remorse or hesitation and punish those who got on his nerves. But seeing how a pure little thing like you getting such a horrible treatment without you deserving any of it, made him feel sick to the pit of his stomach. He got too deep into his thought as he pull a gun out from his pocket without realizing and thinking it through then shot your owner right at his face as you watch the scene in front of you in horror.

The bastard died instantly, his body made a loud thud noise when it hit the floor and blood starts to stain the carpet underneath. Your eyes widened as tears streams down your cheek. Miguel then turned and walks towards you slowly but you stood up and ran away as fast as you can towards your master's bedroom and lock yourself while crying. His men look at Miguel, waiting for his next order. "I'll talk to her." He said with a loud sigh.

He starts knocking at the door, "Little one, please open the door. I won't hurt you I promise." You starts to panic "No go away! Leave me alone! You just killed my master!" You shouted back. Deep down you know that you should be glad that Miguel had killed your master but that makes you feel powerless, knowing that Miguel is capable of hurting anyone let alone killing them.

"I have to okay? He got on my nerves and worse, he hurt you." He spoke again from the other side of the door. "You know nothing about me!" Tears starts to fall even faster from your eyes as the image of your master's dead body kept playing in your head. "Just open this door so I don't need to force it open myself." He said, starting to get frustrated by your behavior.

You ignores him and sat down in the corner of the room, hoping that he'll just go away and leave you alone. He kept knocking at the door but you refused to open it for him. "Fine you won't open this door? I'll have to force it open then." He said before he starts banging harder and harder on the door, cracking it with each of his forcefull movements against the door.

You know very well from how massive he looks that he'll break down the door easily if he wants to. You starts glancing around the room to look for something to protect yourself just incase if Miguel is trying to hurt you. You've been in this room a thousand time when your master forced you to sleep with him but you're never allowed to open his closet or drawers even when you're told to clean his room for him.

Opening the nearest drawer, you starts rummaging to find something sharp to protect yourself. To your surprise you can feel your hand brushing against a hard and cold metal. You never knew your master hid a small gun in his bedroom this whole time but now you're glad he did. Just as you get your hand on the gun the door bursts open and you yelped in surprise. You then points the gun at Miguel "Don't come any closer! Or I'll— I'll shoot you." You said hesitantly.

Miguel look at the gun in your hand with a expressionless face then walks towards you. "I— I said go away!" A step closer from Miguel means a step back from you. But he kept walking closer and ignoring the fact that you have a gun in your hands. Your back hit the wall, making it impossible for you to take another step back from him. He grabbed your hands and points the gun directly at his chest to challenge you. "Go on. Shoot me." He said menacingly. A shiver went down your spine as your hands clenches around the gun and hesitation floods your mind. You never hurt anyone before, how on earth are you going to shoot him?

Your eyes look up at him still with tears on display and your bunny ears tensed then pinned flat back behind you head in fear. Hands trembling badly as you pressed the gun deeper into his chest, not knowing what to do. "That's what I thought." He said before quickly ripped the gun from your hand easily then threw it away to the other side of the room.

You tried to run but he grabbed you wrist and threw you on the floor. "Stop making this harder on yourself." He said before crouching down to meet your eyes. "Please don't hurt me..." You begged while sobbing, hoping that he'll pity you. He just look at your face while caressing your cheek with his massive thumb. Making your face seems so much smaller compared to his hand. "To have such a pretty thing in front of me for free. How lucky of me." He continues to caress your face and admiring your beauty with the feeling of wanting to own you all to himself. Having you safe by his side in his mansion and to have you sleep by his side at night.

But his fantasy must be interrupted by his duty as a mafia leader. "Boss, it's Lyla." One of his men interrupted. "Tell her I'll be there in 10 minutes." He said with so much authority in his voice. "What about her?" His other man looked over at your vulnerable state. Your eyes are focused on Miguel, anticipating his next move. He cussed to himself and took out a syringe from his pocket. "W— what's that for?" You asked nervously. "This? Oh I bring these all the time incase if I need to take a pretty thing like you home." Miguel then cupped you face with one of his free hand and move your face to the side so he could inject your neck easier.

Your hand grabbed his hand, the one that's cupping your cheek. "I don't want this. Please just let me go." He ignores your plea and kissed your cheek softly. "Don't worry little thing, this will only hurt a little okay? Just obey and you'll be just fine." You shook your head but he injected you right away with the syringe. "Good girl." Your body starts to feel numb right away as tears continue to stream down your face. You rest your head against his chest for support. "Shhh that's it, just fall asleep for me like a good girl you are." He pulls you into a hug and starts caressing your hair this time. Your vision starts to blur as darkness starts to invade. Soon you're limp against his chest, breathing softly and peacefully.

He smiled and kissed your forehead before carrying you in his arms in a bridal style. "Let's get going, we don't want the cops to be here anytime soon." He said as he rushed towards his car with you in his arms and his men following behind him. He looked down at your unconscious form in his arms, "Sleep tight, little one."

[writers-blockkk]

The counter

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Content: SEX (p in v)

Ok y'all! 1/3 of the requests done! I'm still working on the other 2 bc I literally wrote this in like one night 💀

Also made this one a full fic bc I haven't done much for my man Stanley yet. Hope this is what anon wanted, I feel like I kept to the plot a little better this time

__________________________________________

Its been almost a year since you decided to work at the Mystery Shack to make some extra spending money. You'd retired early and moved to Gravity Falls for a quiet life, which wasn't constant because of the magic creatures.

Your hair had some gray streaks around your face and by your ears. You always dressed nice for your job, maybe a little outdated but you knew Stan loved to see you in more 70s atire. Makeup was usually on the lighter side, and LOTS of jewelry adorned your neck, wrists, and fingers.

One evening the gnomes broke into the shack trying to steal Mabel away again, and unsurprisingly they caused all sorts of damage. You offered to stay late and help clean up, which Stan gladly agreed to also hoping he'd be able to have some alone time with you.

It was late, cleaning up took much longer than anticipated so Stan sent the kids to bed, and you told Soos you'd finish up since he looked tired. Secretly you were hoping something would happen tonight as well, especially since his flirting had gotten more persistent the last few weeks. You suspected it had something to do with Mabel pushing him to get closer to you, but you're not complaining.

♧

Since you started working at the Mystery Shack, you always caught Stan staring at you or just loitering around you when you restocked. When you were behind the counter he'd stand behind you, almost guarding you and not so secretly staring at your ass. Rather quickly his silent looks turned into loud comments and flirty remarks, like whenever he ended a tour he'd lead customers into the gift shop.

"And welcome to the gift shop! Buy something and you'll get to talk to the most beautiful woman in the world!"

Stan gestures to you while leaning on the side if the counter wiggling his eyebrows at you. Rolling your eyes while helping the first customer helping them check out, your cheeks slowly burning a light pink.

♧

You were just about done with cleaning the gift shop part of the house when Stan walks into the room leaning on the door frame smirking. At first you don't notice him as your humming to the song playing on the radio and shaking your ass slightly while putting away the last few things under the counter.

"Lookin' toots"

Stans voice makes you jump bumping your head on the bottom of the counter. When you stand up a hand rubbing your head you look over at Stan (un)intentionally looking lower noticing a growing bulge in his suit pants.

"Someone's happy to see me"

Eyebrows raised and a smirk on your face you lean against the counter more obviously checking him out as he walks towards you.

"I'm always happy to see you toots"

He returns your teasing, which causes pink to creep from your ears to your cheeks. You're nat able to speak because you know you'll stutter so you just stare into his eyes.

"Whats wrong cat got y'a tongue?"

Stan is mentally freaking out as he slids his large hand around your waist pulling you closer lips almost touching.

"Can I kiss y'a? Been craving it for so long

..."

You can feel his whispers against your face, without answering you wrap your hands around his neck and connecting your lips. Stan makes a sound that's a mix between surprise and a whine when your lips connect, his other hand leaves the counter and grabs the back of your head deepening the kiss.

Stan licks your bottom lip asking for entrance, you part your lips in agreement and he slids his tongue against yours the kiss getting more heated by the second. You guys are all over each other in a matter of seconds, your back being pressed against the counter and your hands desperately grasping at his hair and clothes.

There was a pause when your both needed air, you both looked like you were gonna jump on each other again when Stan spoke.

"I need to be inside you"

You were almost sitting on the counter, hands behind you now as you're looking down at the much larger bulge in his pants.

"Then what are you waiting for?"

The second the words left your mouth it's like he snapped, you were sudden on your stomach on the counter ass up. Stans rock hard bulge pressing against your ass, his hands snake across your hips to the hem of your pants slowly undoing them. Once they're fully unzipped he pulls them off your legs and leaving small kisses on your lower back and tugging at your lace underwear.

"Wearin' the fancy stuff for me now?"

Stans voice is low and teasing as he pulls the underwear over the plump of your ass and let's them fall around your ankles. He slides his right hand down to your dripping folds gently rubbing your clit, his left hand is on your ass massaging and kneeding the flesh.

"So wet and I've barely touched you y'a dirty girl"

Stans voice is low and gravelly against your back while he leaves kisses up your spine till the edge of your shirt that's been pushed up. His fingers work your clit harder now, rubbing tight circles that have you gasping and clawing the counter.

"Please Stan! Don't stop"

You're whining only serves to turn him on more as he slowly dips one finger into you, and is practically sucked in by your greedy cunt. Stan groans at the feeling before adding another finger and pumping slightly to see your reaction.

"Aah fuck, harder!"

You arch backwards moaning rather loudly at the sensation, which caused Stan to use his free hand to clamp over your mouth.

"Shhh, don't want the kids hearin' us"

He whispers in your ear and you nod half moaning against his hand, your breath is heavy and vision glossy when he releases you. He continues to pump his fingers in your tight cunt scissoring them slightly to stretch you out while he leaves hickeys on your neck.

You're trying so hard to keep quiet but Stan's fingerings you so good you can't help the yelps and whines that slip from your throat.

"I said keep quiet"

Stan whispers against your neck before a loud slap is heard and you feel a sharp stinging pain on your left ass cheek. A loud yelp emits from your throat and your head drops between your arms, ass wiggling slightly to try and ease the pain.

"Think you're ready to take me toots?"

You frantically nod looking at him over your shoulder, your eyes are glossed over and needy the look making his cock twitch in anticipation. He removes his fingers that are soaked with your juices and licks them clean moaning at the taste.

He started undoing his pants and let them drop to his ankles, the same with his boxers. His cock is blushed red and rock hard, dripping with precum as he pumps it a few times groaning before rubbing the tip through your folds lubing up a bit.

"Shit toots can't wait to fuck you stupid"

His words make a shiver run through your body, your pussy clenching around nothing. Stan slowly pushes in breathing heavy and holding back moaning too loud, on the other hand you were whimpering and gasping. After giving you a second to adjust he snapped, and bottomed out starting a brutal pace.

You clap a hand over your mouth when he bottoms out to muffle your scream as your body is rocked by his thrusts. Hands gripping the counter as you loudly moan his name, which makes Stan grab a fistful of hair and yank you back into an arch.

"Told y'a to be fuckin' quiet"

His voice is stern and low as he's still pounding you so deep there's a bulge forming in your belly. He wraps a hand around your throat squeezing slightly to restrict your noise, your eyes roll back at the feeling pussy tightening around his cock.

You can feel it, you can feel everything he's doing to you, the way his fingers dig into your throat to every vein on his cock. You're so close to cumming but can't say anything, you're so fucked out all you can do is moan.

"So close babe, just hol' on"

Stan groans against the crook of your neck sucking a large hickey onto it, his thrusts getting sloppy. He slides his free hand down to your clit rubbing tight circles again, which causes you to whine loudly even through his throat hold. You cum all over his cock, pussy clamping down on him which causes him to spray his hot seed inside and collapse over your back.

You both are panting hard laying on the counter, Stan pulls out of you after a second admiring his work. Mixed cum dripping out and down your thighs, he slides his hands down your back grabbing both ass cheeks and squeezing.

"You're so hot like this toots"

A smirk etching onto his face as he grabs a few tissues and wipes you up, you mumble while your face is laying on the counter. He then lazily pulls your pants back up and carried you up to his room changing you into one of his old t-shirts and shorts. He lays you in his bed and climbs in with you pulling you close and drifting to sleep.

"Love y'a toots

[accioprocrastination]

The Reunion

Jake "Hangman" Seresin x wife Reader

A/N: Military inaccuracies, angst and fluff

I haven't proof read this so apologies in advance...

Summary: You're redeployed to the same base as your husband

Reader POV

You touched down in North Island this morning so it's not out of the ordinary that you've spent all evening getting to know the team already stationed here.

It's nearing two a.m. and you're beginning to hit your limit of social interaction. You take a seat on one of the bar stools against the wall closing your eyes momentarily wishing you were home.

"I am so tired I need to go to get out of here and Javy is barely standing, so I'm going to get him something to eat. If any of y'all want food we're leaving now." Jake says walking up to the table where you're sat with a couple of your colleagues.

"Food sounds great." You respond without question. His eyes twinkle as they meet yours and you stare at the laughter lines that momentarily form as he gives you a quick smile. God he's good looking and he knows it.

"I should probably go too and try and adjust to this timezone." Preacher says from next to you getting up and walking out without a more elaborate goodbye. You roll your eyes at his constant holier than thou wisdom.

You watch silently as Jake struggles to make Javy put his jacket on, smirking at the futile effort.

It's only Bob and you left sitting here as Jake continues his fruitless attempt to put Javy's jacket on him.

"I'm hungry - I'm going to go with them. Are you coming?" You ask Bob. He shakes his head.

"No I'm good." He says quietly. You've noticed how he tenses up around your husband and have refrained from commenting.

"Did something happen with Hangman and you? He gets mouthy when he's nervous." You try to defend Hangman having no idea what he's said or done to make Bob feel uncomfortable.

"Nothing's happened I just don't like him." Bob says not opening up to you. It's probably a good thing he's so reserved, so that he doesn't unknowingly start slagging off your husband to you.

You still feel a stone drop in your stomach at his confession.

"How do you know him?" Bob asks watching you staring at the scene before you. You tear your eyes off of Jake and look at Bob.

"We've been stationed together before. Lots of times actually." You explain not really telling him anything.

"He doesn't act like a human." Bob counters and without him elaborating you know what he means completely.

"He takes a long time to open up to people." You state.

"I don't think he feels emotions like normal people." Bob says staring at Jake as he beams at something Javy is slurring at him.

"He's not the person he pretends to be. I think he feels things more deeply than a lot of us and he doesn't know how to handle it so he plays Hangman... I'd rather fly with someone with that level-headedness than an emotional wreck." You remark.

"I think that's the first time anyone's called Hangman level-headed." Bob sniggers as the other two reach the door.

You smile sort of mentally agreeing with him that, that was a poor choice of words. "I know him better than other people. He's not that person when you get to know him." You shrug getting up.

"Does he know that you're in love with him?" Bob asks watching you.

You smile at the WSO completely ignoring his question as you say goodbye, "I'll see you in the morning Bob."

*

You head to the bathroom, leaving Jake to ensure that a very drunken Javy manages to sit down in the only diner open at this ungodly hour in the morning.

Jake has been stealing glances at you all night and you know he's making himself frustrated because of your no PDA around colleagues rule.

He was the one to enforce the rule and he'll never vocalise that he hates it.

You're drying your hands as the door to the bathroom smashes against the wall. It swings open to reveal a guilty looking Jake who has tried to open the door with a bit too much enthusiasm.

"Shit, sorry!" he says taking a step inside. He stops right behind you and breathes a sigh of relief that you're finally alone for the first time this evening.

You throw the paper towel in the bin, breaking your eye contact through the mirror and turning to face him.

"Lieutenant" you tease him, knowing that he loves it when you call him that. His eyes instantly darken and he steps closer, giving you a look that you can only describe as hunger.

He leans in like he's going to kiss you then stops abruptly, barely a hair's breadth away from your face.

Jake's giving you such a mischievous grin that you have to wonder what he's currently thinking. "You didn't tell me you got promoted to captain, Captain." He whispers.

"I wanted to tell you in person." You inform him as you take ahold of his left hand.

"Congrats darlin'" He says quickly breaking the hand hold and lifting you up slightly to kiss him.

You jump up and knot your legs around his waist. "I-" he starts but you cut him off.

"Please stop talking and just kiss me already." You say.

"Your wish is my command." He spouts before his lips finally meet yours.

You run your fingers through his hair as he manoeuvres to sit you against the sinks. He groans above you - still taking care to gently set you down.

You deepen the kiss to muffle him. He doesn't comment on how your legs tighten around his waist in response.

He breaks the kiss and you huff out of frustration before he starts kissing down your jaw and your neck.

"I have wanted to do this all day." his words tickle against your neck.

"Javy's waiting." you remind Jake and he halts.

His strong arms cloak around you in a tight hug. You hug back with the same force.

"He can wait another minute." Jake says refusing to let you go.

When he loosens his grip to let you go, you tighten your hold on him. "One more minute" You say into his shoulder. Jake is more than happy to oblige to your request.

"God I missed you." He murmurs before you echo the sentiment.

*

Jake is uncontrollably giggling in the passenger seat of your car which makes you laugh harder at your own stupid joke. It is so rare to crack him like this.

His arms are wrapped around you like a blanket as you walk inside the hotel.

Your laughter cuts off as you both spot an elderly couple in the elevator and Jake untangles himself from you to be more presentable in front of them.

You step in and press the button to your floor as he talks with the elderly couple.

"Thank you for your service" the old lady says to Jake.

"It's my pleasure ma'am" he responds as the elevator pings their floor.

Once it eventually reaches your floor, you practically run out pulling him by the hand.

The second the room door closes behind you, he pounces and pulls you onto the bed.

Jake climbs on top of you, trapping you beneath his body to reiterate what he was saying earlier.

"I missed you." he sighs, needing you to know how much.

"I missed you too." you reply smiling widely.

"I don't think you understand how much." He says before kissing your jaw.

"I miss laughing with you", he presses another kiss against your jaw.

"I miss turning to see your face whenever someone says something I know would make you laugh", he kisses you again.

"I miss our friendship." He says continuing the trail of kisses.

You push on his shoulders moving him to switch positions with you.

"Trust me, I understand how much." You respond kissing him on the lips.

"I wish we could be together all of the time." You tell him breaking the kiss to talk some more.

"I don't like when we meet up after months apart and I'm not sure where we stand." Jake vocalises his anxiety as you run a finger down his cheek.

"We're never in a bad place. We could not speak for months and I'd still be around waiting for you. I know it can be weird to readjust to each others' routines but I'm always going to love you regardless of what happens in between us being together physically in the same place." You say meeting his gaze.

You know he worries when you're apart and you watch as he relaxes into the sheets.

"Sometime I feel insecure that you look at me and know my insecurities, doubts and fears and I don't understand why you love me." He admits.

"You're everything to me. You know that right?" You question.

It's unfrequent that Jake opens up to you like this, so you're not overly surprised when he deflects. "So when we argue about what colour to paint the kitchen?" He tease you about your last big argument.

You roll your eyes, smiling at him. "I still love you even when you're wrong." You say before kissing him again.

"Ditto!" He mumbles against your lips.

You pull back and he smirks knowing you're about to rebuttal.

"I cannot believe that you have brought that up! Now all I'm thinking about is that we still haven't chosen a colour." You declare, jokily hitting Jake's bicep making him laugh.

"We'll pick something soon." he yawns, tiredness hitting him like a tidal wave. His eyes sting from the brightness of the hotel lighting.

You watch Jake turn to look at the clock on the bedside table. It is already 3.24 am.

"You tired princess?" you ask him running a finger along his eyebrows making his eyes flutter shut. It's an unfair tactic that you know will make him more sleepy.

"Wide awake sweetheart." the lie falls from his lips seconds before he is unable to stop another yawn.

You clamber off him instantly.

"Nooo." Jake complains grabbing the back of your thighs to try and stop you getting up.

"I'm not hooking up with you if you're going to lie there yawning." You remark standing up to go brush your teeth.

Jake pouts, "when did I get so old that I can't pull all-nighters?" You smile down at him silently wishing you could both stay awake talking for a few more hours.

He rubs his eyes trying not to fall asleep; longing to do more than kiss you. You both know your husband will be asleep the minute you come back and turn the light off.

[look-me]

“𝑷𝑹𝑰𝑵𝑪𝑬𝑺𝑺”

masc!reader x dealer!abby

warnings: using of weed, idk what else

ーー

au: please don't mind any grammar mistakes and please cuz english its not my native language. ps. i never write a smut. also i'll probably won't correct any mistakes cuz i'm too lazy for it

(this story is shitty how can y'all read this 😭)

part 1

part 2

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It’s been a week since you kissed Abby, and the two of you haven’t talked at all. You’ve tried to ignore her whenever you could, but still, you didn’t want her to notice. For example, every time she replied to one of your Instagram stories, you would ‘respond’ by just liking her messages. You wanted to hang out with your usual friend group, but they got mad at you after seeing you leave with Abby that night. They accused you of being a fake friend, of stealing Abby from them—especially one friend of yours who, as you later found out, had a big crush on Abby since the first time she saw her.

“You can’t do that, Y/N! What the fuck is wrong with you? You’re my friend! Why would you do something like that to me?!”

Today, you’re hanging out with some other friends who came into town to see you after you explained what your ex-friends did and what happened with Abby after you left with her. They were shocked. They didn’t know Abby at all, but after you showed them some pictures of her, they just said,

“Y/N, she’s hot and all, but she’s a player. Don’t get attached. Just stay friends with her if you don’t want to cut her off entirely.” After that, they insisted you hang out with them to distract yourself from her.

Now, you and your friends are in a parking lot, vibing to the music blasting from the car speakers, while some other people give you and your group judgmental glances. Your friends are smoking and drinking, screaming their lungs out, singing along to the songs. While you’re laughing at their antics, you notice a girl with black curly hair, long red nails, makeup on, dressed all in black—tight top, tight pants. It’s Julia.

A long time ago, you had a little crush on her because she used to shower you with compliments, was always there for you, and every time you two hung out, it ended in a make-out session. But after you told her you were catching feelings, she started ghosting you, saying she wasn’t ready for a relationship because she had just gotten out of one. You later found out she was lying the whole time, and from that day forward, you started hating her.

-

"Hey," she says with that fake, innocent smile.

Fake ugly bitch.

Why does she have to ruin your moment right now?

"Hi," you mutter, not even looking her in the eyes as you sit on the ground.

"It's been a while."

"Yep," you reply, barely caring about what she says.

"Listen," she starts, her hand sliding onto your thigh, caressing it and moving up and down, dangerously close to your pussy.

You're about to push her away when—

"Hey chicas!" Manny calls out.

"Hey, Manny," she smiles, turning her head towards him.

"What are you two up to?"

"Oh, we're just talking and having fun."

"That kind of fun?" he asks with a smirk.

The girl laughs at Manny's joke and then says,

"I wish."

You whip your head to look at her, your expression dead serious and disgusted, silently screaming: Why the fuck would you say that?

"By the way, aren't you Mike's sister?" Manny asks.

"Yeah, how do you know him?" you respond, your voice clipped as you shoot him a serious and irritated look. It's not your fault you come off as mad, but Julia's presence is grating on your nerves right now.

"You know, he gives me things when my best friend can't," Manny says casually.

You roll your eyes, already tired of hearing that same old story. Every time someone says they know your brother, it's always because of the same damn reason-he's a dealer, and you're so over it.

"Okay," you reply, clearly done with the conversation.

"Okay, chicas, I'll leave you two alone now.

See you later," Manny says, heading off.

The second he's far enough away, you round on Julia.

"What the fuck was that? What's your problem?" you snap, roughly pushing her hand away from your thigh.

"Omg, Y/N! I was just joking," she protests.

"No, fuck you. You know what you did to me-treating me like I was your girlfriend, telling me l was yours, making out with me, and then saying you didn't want a relationship. You have serious fucking problems for saying that shit in front of him when I don't even know him. And you say it like it's nothing? Do you even realize how much that hurt me? Are you fucking stupid? Why are you even here anyway?"

You and Julia are in the middle of a heated argument, voices rising as you go back and forth. Your friends are still chilling with the music blasting, completely unaware of the tension between the two of you. Julia’s face is twisted with frustration, but you’re too fed up to care.

Meanwhile, Abby is at home, watching some random movie to pass the time when a notification pops up on her phone:

Manny - 2 new messages.

“Hey, pendeja”

“Wanna hang out when I’m done with some stuff?”

A new notification interrupts:

*NEW MESSAGES*

Manny: Do you know Mike’s sister?

“Isn’t she the girl you told me about? They look similar by your description.”

*image.*

Abby quickly taps on the notifications, her curiosity piqued. The image loads, and her stomach drops. It’s a picture of you and Julia, her hand resting way too high on your thigh. Abby stares at the image for a moment, her jaw tightening.

She replies instantly.

Abby: Where are you?

“In the usual parking lot we hang out at with Owen, Jordan, you know.”

“You still want to hang out?”

“Yeah, I’m picking up the others right now, be at your place in 10.”

“Okay.”

Ten minutes later, Manny pulls up at Abby’s house, and soon they’re walking through the parking lot. Abby’s eyes are scanning the crowd until she spots you, her expression darkening.

Manny heads your way, shouting, “Hey, told you I’d be back so—” He stops mid-sentence when he sees Julia kissing you, her lips pressed against yours as a soft moan escapes her. Abby freezes, her vision tunneling, anger flaring up inside her. Her fists clench as her heart pounds in her chest.

Just then, your friend Micheal calls out from the car, unknowingly saving you from the situation, “Y/N! Wanna try this drink? It’s fire!”

You push Julia away from you, wiping your mouth quickly, and stand up, turning to head toward Martin. But just as you reach for the drink, a hand snatches it away before you can grab it.

“You’re not drinking tonight,” a cold voice says.

You look up to see Abby standing in front of you, her blue eyes burning with barely-contained anger.

“Abby? What are you—“

“Shut your mouth and walk,” she snaps, throwing the drink aside before grabbing your arm. Her grip is firm, leaving no room for argument as she pulls you away from the group, forcing you to walk with her.

Your heart races as you glance back at your friends, then at Julia, but Abby doesn't care. She’s got you now, and there’s no escaping whatever comes next.

"Abby, stop."

"Manny, give me your car keys. I'll be back in a minute."

"Sure," he says, handing Abby the keys without asking any questions.

"Get in the car, Y/N."

"Abby, let me go."

She opens the car door and forces you inside. As she takes the driver's seat, you try to open the door, but she's already locked it.

"Abby, what's wrong with you? Open the fucking door!"

Abby doesn't respond. She starts the engine and speeds out of the parking lot.

"Abby, slow down!"

After twenty minutes of speeding, Abby pulls over in the middle of nowhere-no lights, no houses, just darkness all around.

"Fuck! Abigail!"

She turns on the interior light, and you look at her, scared of what might happen. You don't know if Abby is a violent person or not. Her eyes are filled with fury, and you can see she's seething with anger.

"We need to talk. Now."

"No, we don't."

"Oh yeah? So you think it's okay to ignore me and treat me like l'm a stranger?"

"Wha-"

"Don't play dumb, Y/N, and don't make any excuses. You're not even drunk."

The silence between you two grows heavier.

"Why did you stop talking to me after we kissed?"

"Isn't it obvious?"

"What do you mean?"

"Abby, you have a new girl with you every two seconds. You're always having sex or making out with them in a blink of an eye." You sigh before continuing, "I felt-and still feel-like a sex toy to you."

"You're not."

"Yeah, like I can really trust you on that," you say sarcastically, turning your face to the window. "I should've never told you about my feelings. We can't work together."

"Y/N-"

"I fucking hate you, Abby. I hate having feelings for someone who would probably just use me however she likes!" You spit out, facing her again.

"I've told you many times that I don't like how you talk to me. I'm serious, Y/N. Stop."

"Abby, seriously, fuck you."

At that, she grabs your neck, nearly choking you, and pulls you two inches away from her face.

"Oh yeah? Then who is that girl? And why was she kissing you and moaning into your mouth? Why was she almost touching your pussy moments before I showed up?"

After the last sentence, you try to understand how she could have seen that, and then you connect the dots. She’s Manny’s best friend. But how?

“How do you—”

“Manny sent me a picture.”

Fuck you, manny

“It’s none of your business who she is, and I didn’t try anything with her.”

“Then why didn’t you push her away from you?” Abby says, tightening her grip on your neck slightly.

“I was shocked. She caught me by surprise.”

Abby doesn’t answer. Instead, she keeps her intense gaze fixed on you, trying to see if you’re lying.

“I was just trying to distract myself from you. Now you’re acting jealous, calling me yours, but are you mine?” you say

“What do you think?”

“You aren’t. I think we both know that, Abigail.”

Just then, your phone starts ringing with a photo of a curly haired woman —Julia — popping up.

Abby recognizes the girl and stares at you, clearly unimpressed by the timing.

“Don’t you even try to answer.”

You ignore her and answer the phone, putting it on speaker.

“Hello? Love?” Julia says, and you remain silent.

Abby looks at you and whispers, “Love? Really?”

“Julia, what do you want?”

“Just wanted to make sure you’re okay. I saw that girl taking you away from me while we were talking.”

As Julia continues talking, Abby starts giving you hickeys on your neck, causing you to moan intentionally. You’re so focused on the sensations that you stop listening to whatever Julia is saying.

“Are you okay, love?” Julia asks, her voice tinged with concern.

Abby pulls her head away from your neck and grabs your phone from your hand. You try to fight her, but you know Abby is hundred times stronger than you.

“She’s busy right now,” Abby says before hanging up on Julia.

“Abby, what the fuck?”

Abby doesn’t answer. Instead, she pulls out a pack of cigarettes from her pocket, which contains a joint and a lighter.

You know where this is going to end.

Abby leans back in the driver’s seat and brings the joint to her lips, the tip flaring orange in the complete darkness. The only sound is the faint crackle of burning paper and herb as she takes a long drag. Smoke fills the air, swirling around her in lazy spirals, barely visible in the faint moonlight that seeps through the windows. The deep, earthy scent of cannabis mixes with the musty smell of the old car seats, creating an almost comforting atmosphere. Abby exhales slowly, the smoke pouring from her mouth and nostrils, diffusing into the blackness outside. The silence is profound, with no hum of traffic or distant chatter, only the occasional rustle of wind through unseen trees. Her eyes are half-closed, her mind drifting as she stares out into the void, feeling an odd sense of peace in the isolation. She takes another drag, the glow from the joint briefly illuminating her fingers before once again merging with the surrounding darkness.

“Are you fucking kidding me right now?”

Abby remains silent.

“Are you really smoking while we’re arguing?”

Still.

“I’m done with your bullshit, Abigail. Let me go.”

As you say this, Abby rests the joint between her lips, freeing both of her hands.

Abby’s hands clutch the car’s armrest. With a sudden, rough motion, she yanks you toward her, forcing you onto her lap. You gasp, startled by Abby’s intensity as your bodies collide in the confined space of Manny’s motionless car. She removes one hand from your waist to grab the joint and exhale the smoke.

“I told you many times to stop calling me by my full name,” she says, gripping your neck and pulling you closer to her face.

“And I told you many times I’m not any of your bitches, Abigail.”

“You’re mine, Y/N.”

“Fuck you.”

“You would like that, wouldn’t you?” she says, closing the distance between you until you’re just two inches apart.

“Too bad you made me mad,” she whispers.

You’re about to respond when her phone starts ringing. The caller ID shows ‘Manny.’

Abby rolls her eyes and throws away her joint as if it’s nothing.

“What do you want?”

“Abby, I need my car. Owen needs to grab something from home.”

“Fine.” She hangs up. Without missing a beat, she turns her head and locks her gaze with yours, her icy blue eyes filled with a silent warning.

“Don’t you even try to go back to her when we’re there again,” Abby says, her voice low but firm, every word laced with intensity.

You meet her stare, unimpressed. “You’re so annoying, Abby.”

With a sigh, you move to open the car door, slipping off Abby’s lap and sliding back into the passenger seat, feeling the shift in the air between you. Abby’s eyes never leave you, even as she shifts back into the driver’s seat, jaw tight, hands resting on the steering wheel, as if bracing for whatever comes next. As soon as you settle back into the passenger seat, Abby shifts the car into gear, her fingers tightening around the wheel. The tension in the air is thick, unspoken words hanging between you as you drive in silence. The dark, winding roads stretch out before you, the headlights cutting through the night, but neither of you says a word. Abby’s eyes flick over to you a few times, but she stays focused on the road. Her jaw is set, frustration simmering beneath her calm exterior. You lean against the window, your breath fogging up the glass slightly, arms crossed as the hum of the engine and the rhythm of the tires on the asphalt become the only sounds. Minutes pass, feeling like hours, until the familiar sight of the compound appears in the distance, its fortified walls and the glow of lights signaling you are back. The tension shifts, replaced by a looming sense of inevitability. The car rolls to a stop near the entrance where Manny and a few others are waiting, standing in the dim light as they speak amongst themselves. Abby kills the engine and sits there for a moment, staring straight ahead. “We’re here,” she mutters, her tone curt. You shoot her a sidelong glance but don’t say anything. You push open the door and step out, the cool night air hitting your skin as you stretch, shaking off the weight of the car ride. Manny notices you and gives a short wave, walking over with a grin on his face.

"Hey, took you guys long enough," he jokes, but he quickly notices the tension radiating from you and Abby.

Abby climbs out of the driver's seat, standing tall as she slams the door shut. Her eyes briefly meet yours, but she quickly turns to Manny. “We had some things to discuss about.” she says, her voice flat.

Manny raises a brow, sensing the atmosphere between you, but doesn’t press it. “Well, glad you're back. i’ll take owen at home home, we’ll be back in 10.”

After Manny finishes talking, you move to walk back to your friends when you feel pressure on your waist. It's Abby, her large, veiny hands gripping you firmly. She leans in, her voice low and steady.

"I'm coming with you."

"No, leave me alone," you reply, trying to pull away.

"Calm down, princess. I haven't even started with you yet," she whispers into your ear, smirking. Then, without warning, she presses a kiss against your neck, and it makes you freeze in place.

Abby lets you go, but she stays close, walking beside you with that familiar intensity. From a distance, one of your friends notices Abby’s presence and immediately makes her way over. Without hesitation, she grabs your arm, pulling you away from the tension. Abby lets you go, her hand sliding off your waist as she begins walking next to you, her presence still heavy in the air.

"Come hereeee" she says, her voice light and carefree as she leads you toward the others. The music from the speakers pulses through the empty parking lot, and soon enough, you’re moving to the beat, your friend helping you shake off the tension as Abby watches from the sidelines, her gaze never leaving you. As the beat of the next song thumps through the speakers, your friend throws her head back, laughing. She leans into you, resting her head on your shoulder, her laughter light and carefree.

“Oh my god, I’ve never had this much fun in so long,” she says, still giggling, her words slurring from all the excitement. You feel her happiness infectiously sinking in.

Abby Standing off to the side, arms crossed, her jaw clenched tight, she watches you with a growing intensity. The sight of you laughing, vibing, and lost in the moment with your friend pushes her to the edge. Her patience snaps, and she starts walking toward you, the determination in her stride cutting through the music. You can feel the weight of her presence approaching, the air around you thickening.

She's had enough.

When Abby reaches you, her large hand grips your arm—not harshly, but firm enough that you feel the seriousness behind it.

“We’re done here,” Abby says, her voice low and commanding. There’s a tension in her words that sends a chill down your spine. She’s barely keeping it together. Abby isn’t going to wait for an answer, and before you can think too hard about it, she’s pulling you away from the music, away from the carefree vibe, and into the shadowy edges of the parking lot. You open your mouth to protest, the frustration bubbling up inside you, but before you can say a word, Abby steps in close, towering over you, her eyes gleaming with a dangerous mix of control and desire.

“Not even a word,” she interrupts, her voice low and unwavering. Her smirk pulls at the corner of her lips, sending a shiver down your spine. “Just wait till we get home,” she adds, her tone dripping with a promise that makes your pulse quicken. It’s the kind of tone that says it all:

I’m going to make you regret that.

You stand there, frozen, caught between defiance and the undeniable pull Abby has over you. your friends’s voice a distant hum as Abby’s presence overtakes everything. There’s no escape from the intensity in her eyes, and you know whatever is waiting for you at home is going to be something you won’t forget easily. After a moment of tense silence between you and Abby, Manny walks back over, catching sight of the two of you standing close, the tension still thick in the air. He raises an eyebrow, but doesn’t say anything at first, sensing the shift.

“Oye chicas, you guys good?” he asks with a playful smile, his voice casual, but there’s a knowing edge to it. Manny has been around Abby long enough to pick up on her moods, and right now, he’s smart enough to stay out of it.

Abby barely glances his way, her hand still lingering on your arm. “Can you take us to my place?” she asks, her voice steady, but there’s no mistaking the undertone of command. It’s not really a request, and Manny knows it. He looks between the two of you, his gaze lingering on Abby for a beat longer. He doesn’t ask why or what’s going on—he doesn’t need to. Manny knows Abby better than almost anyone, and he can tell exactly what kind of mood she’s in.

“Sí, claro,” he says with a nod, keeping it simple. He doesn’t pry, doesn’t ask the questions swirling in his mind. After all, Abby is his best friend, and if there’s one thing he’s learned over the years, it’s when to mind his own business. You steal a glance at Abby, her smirk still lingering, and your stomach tightens with a mix of anticipation and nerves. Manny leads the way to the car, and you can feel Abby’s gaze burning into you the whole time. Whatever’s coming, you’re not going to be able to avoid it. You slide into the backseat with Abby beside you, the car ride feeling heavier than it should. Manny stays quiet up front, the silence only broken by the low rumble of the engine as he drives, and you’re left wondering what’s going to happen when you finally get to Abby’s place.

-

who knows what is going to happen next👀

[emojifarm]

I'm so fucking tired of nearly every emoji creator having some form of drama attached to them. It's gotten worse this year. So much worse. This space has become so toxic and hateful when it should be loving and uplifting. All the ones that actually are loving and uplifting either go ignored yet post away or give up after a few months and just disappear with an abandoned blog or randomly deactivate.

I want to preserve content and provide for those that need it, but there's so many creators that I just can't turn a blind eye to shit for anymore that this blog would be basically empty if I stopped platforming those bad apples. This shit is why I'm so goddamned burned out. This isn't even a community anymore. Just a popularity contest of "who can I hurt more?", "who can steal the most?", "who can recover from the most cancellations?" (looking you in the eyes Custom-emojis). I'm over the middle school/high drama of it all. Why can't y'all just create art in peace and help those that need this for accessibility? Why make it a fucking thing?

I'm so disappointed and ashamed of so many of you. I'm 25. I'm too old for this shit. A chunk of y'all are too old to be acting this foolish. Get your shit together or you just might see my retirement soon. I'm done with y'all.

PS: To those in the community that are good noodles and actively help me: I see you and I appreciate y'all so much. You make my days on this hellsite and Discord so much more bearable. Know this is not about y'all. You're wonderful. Keep doing you.

[mscordonean]

MY LOVE MINE ALL MINE

You're new photo shoot was a success in the papers! Guys around the world are loving the new magazine! Kento:... Oop! Looks like someone's jealous! Kento:.... And that's my que to leave y'all, enjoy!

"No no nooo" Kento's secretary panics after checking the official social media page of the company. "What's wrong Mr. Secretary" you say getting his handkerchief from his pocket to wipe the sweat off his forehead. "Don't do that Mr. Nanami will kill me 2x!!!". "Okay now I'm really curious, spill it out!". "I posted a picture of you to the platform that Mr. Nanami specifically told me not to! I must have been half asleeppp". The man sobs as if his life was about to end. "Let me see what picture you posted" you grab his phone and see the picture. Oh this was bad, Kenny was gonna kill him! "This is the one Ken jerked off to!". The Secretary stares and you for a moment and you realised you might have overshared just a little bit. "Well other men are probably doing that to this pic aswell!" "Well then just delete it!" "I can't the press are gonna mark that down in history and the company will be at risk!" Suddenly you two hear a deep voice call out to you guys.

"Is anything the matter Mr. John and my lovely Wife?" You react to quickly, clinging onto Mr. John's arm. 'I'm going to get fired!' Mr. John thinks pulling you off him. "We were just talking about my next photo shoot honey, why don't you go out side to get some fresh air". You chuckle nervously while holding onto his arm and leading him out. "Wait a minute I'm not an old man i can go myself!". You and Mr. John stare at him. "I mean thank you for the offer honey, come by my office later". He pecks you on the lips and leaves. "WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO". You and Mr. John scream together. "just leave it for now, if you don't make it obvious maybe he won't check!" You praise yourself with a pat on the back. "You're right!, I'll be going then miss" Mr. John sighs in relief , "Bye Mr. John!"

A few hours later...

You are scrolling on your phone, waiting for your next photo shoot in an hour when a next pops up on your screen.

You make your way up to Kento's office not thinking about the consequences of your actions. You open the door to see Kento staring at his phone. "Ken?" He looks up at you. "Did you ask Mr. John to put these pictures up?" He looks tired, worn out even. "no no it wasn't on purpose, Mr. John accidentally-" Kento gets annoyed. "so he did this". "Not only that but he allowed these disrespectful boys say things about you". You look at his phone and see the "she wants me frrr" and "i wish i was that lollipop" comments and laugh. "I get that all the time Kenny and your only just seeing it?" He glares at you. "Don't be jealous Ken, I only want you frrr" you sit on his lap and pull his tie towards you for a kiss. He kisses you for longer when his phone pings. It's another comment saying "Mr. Nanami better watch out before i steal his girl😮‍💨".

Kento "I'm firing Mr. John"

Yn "nooo he didn't mean to post itt"

[randogirlo-fando-main]

Steven Hyde x Reader

Y'all I'm already halfway done with the next part so hopefully this is good

Word count:4.2k+ (Aka my longest piece yet)

Warnings, swearing, smoking, making out, slight sexual themes

Point Place, Wisconsin

April 5th, 1977

7:38pm

Location: Eric Forman's Basement

The sounds of Gilligan’s Island fill the basement from the television, smoke in the air as you all sit in the usual circle.

“It runs on water man! I swear you guys just don’t get it.” Hyde huffs, everyone kind of spacing out on their own highs.

“No we get it Hyde, we just also hear it every time we get in this damn circle.” You say, giggling at Donna playing with her hair.

“(Y/n), do you have any candy on you?” Fez clasps his hands together, begging for a yes.

“Of course Fez, someone has to keep you fed.” You throw him a pack of milk duds before throwing a second one to Kelso, already seeing the look in his eyes.

“Man (Y/n), if you weren’t always playing hard to get I’d totally do you.”

“It’s not playing hard to get if I don’t want you dumbass.” You punch his shoulder next to you as he dramatically leans back.

“That hurt!” You smile at him before flicking his nose in response.

“You know, if you’re not careful you’re gonna turn into Red.” Forman looks at you, nodding softly to himself.

“Actually I think your mom is who I want to be when I grow up. Minus the whore daughter and smart mouthed son.” Hyde lifts his arm for a high five to which you give him in pride.

“BURN!” Kelso yells, laughing uncontrollably despite the fact it wasn’t even that good of a burn, just the first time you’ve ever retaliated.

“She’s coming along nicely right? I’m teaching her everything I know.”

When you met the group, you were this quiet 13 year old that had just moved to Point Place from Louisiana. Donna had been the first to approach you, giving you a verbal invitation to join her for lunch. Ever since, you’ve been there for all the shenanigans they’ve done. Usually playing mom for the group to keep them from actually dying. You can safely say you were not there the last time Kelso fell off the water tower otherwise all the pain of a hospital trip and Eric walking in on his parents doing the nasty would’ve not been necessary. The last year, you’ve been tired of being so quiet and reserved around the general public. Hyde offered you an apprenticeship of zen, though you mostly smoke and talk.

“Only took 4 years but here she is, blossoming into a degenerate.” Donna grabs your shoulders like a proud mom, shaking you slightly. Almost instantly the door to the basement swings open, Jackie darting in and standing in front of the TV.

“Donna, (Y/n) are you two ready or not? I’ve been waiting next door listening to Bob sing.” She cringes before walking closer to the couch and pulling you both up by one arm.

“For such a tiny little thing you sure are strong.” You spat, tinge of annoyance in your voice.

“We’re supposed to be having girls night! Facials, manicures, the whole works and instead you’re down here with the boys doing god knows what.” She huffs tapping her foot.

“Relax Jackie, we just needed a circle session to prepare for this.” You say, dramatically gesturing between the girls and you.

“We better go before Jackie drags us out.” Donna gives Eric a kiss goodbye before us three go next door for a night at Donna’s.

There's a moment of silence in the basement, interrupted by Eric clearing his throat.

“Soo, my room has a perfect view of the girls’ sleepover.” Eric points upstairs before all the boys jump up from the couch to head upstairs, hoping to steal a peek at what the girls are doing.

“Donna, remind me to buy your dad pajama pants for Christmas.” You shiver recalling her dad in just a robe and underwear. You all three sit on Donna’s bed as Jackie ruffles through the bag she brought.

“Okay since I know whatever you’re using doesn’t work I brought face masks from home.” Donna pushes Jackie over on the bed as you look through the options. As you all apply the masks in silence, Donna puts music on since she was the first to finish hers.

“So (n/n), any guys? Maybe a secret lover?” Donna shimmies her shoulders in an over-the-top way causing a laugh from you as the blush spreads through your face.

“I mean, I haven’t actually had a crush since we were sophomores. There may be one developing though so we shall see.” You grab one of the stuffed animals Jackie brought, pulling it to your body to hide yourself.

“Well who is this contender? This is history making!” Jackie grabs your shoulders to look up at her.

“I wouldn’t say that-“

“You haven’t had a love life for over two years. I mean there was the one from the house party I brought you to but that was it and it was only one night.” You dig yourself more into the stuffed animal.

“You guys are gonna scream if I say though. Maybe not angry scream but definitely scream.” Their eyes widen as they look between each other and you.

“OH MY GOD IT’S HYDE!” Jackie screams, making you clamp a hand over her mouth.

“Shut the hell up please, we already know the boys are gonna try to sneak in or something like they always do.” You say in a hushed tone, brows furrowed and face bright red.

“Oh my god it is Hyde!” Donna says, grabbing your face with both hands.

“Tell us everything.” You nod as she lets go of you, about to spill all the little moments and stolen glances.

“Dude, what do you think they’re talking about?” Eric says, trying his hardest to hear through the walls.

“I don’t know but- OH JACKIE IS ABOUT TO KISS (Y/N) I REPEAT JACKIE IS ABOU- Oh she was just grabbing her by the shoulders.” Kelso had the binoculars, watching their every move.

“They’re probably talking about boys, or how attracted they are to each other. Look how pink (Y/n) is.” Fez says, eating the popsicle he grabbed from the basement.

“Wait, is- GUYS DONNA IS GONNA KISS (Y/N)!” They all scurry to get closer the window before seeing her pull away.

“Damn why do they keep doing that!?”

“Okay there’s definitely something going on. Jackie isn’t talking at all!”

“Whatever (L/n)'s saying must be really good.” Hyde looks at your side profile, taking in the pink settling through your face and how fast you're talking.

“I'm definitely not his type though, I mean you remember that biker chick. He almost ran away with her!" Donna shakes her head at you.

"Dude you're the only person he doesn't mess with."

"Because I'm the least annoying in the group." Jackie scoffs as you giggle at her.

"Oh please you run around playing mom, that's annoying enough."

"Hey I make it safe fun, you make it no fun. Constant 'don't do that Michael, you're all idiots' it's so annoying. News flash, they're still gonna do it! " She pulls your hair and before you can retaliate, Donna is pushing down to the bed.

"Okay then how about we go see what movies are on?" The redhead exclaims, dragging you both off her bed.

"What's up losers?" You say as you barge into the basement, grocery bags in hand.

"What did you bring?" A smirk comes across your face before putting all but one bag down.

"Just a little something for everyone. First, Fez here's some family size skittles." You present them dramatically before throwing the bag to the boy.

"Okay next we have Frito's, potato chips, Pringles, chocolate for Donna specifically because I love you, some Jackie approved soda since it's never here, and beer!" As everyone grabs at the pile of food, you stand there accomplished. You make your way to sit on the floor before Hyde gets up without a word and sits on the arm of the couch. Your brows furrow at him before he motions for you to sit down in his chair. You reluctantly sit, everyone freezing at the sight.

"Why are you in Hyde's chair?" Fez asks, popping a skittle in his mouth.

"More importantly, why did Hyde give up his chair?" Eric's eyes go wide as a lightbulb goes off in his head.

"Wa-" Before he could even finish a word, Donna is elbowing him in the side to shut him up.

"No way, they're doing it!" Kelso exclaims, pointing back and forth at you both. Hyde punches him in the shoulder, causing a pained 'ow' to come from the boy.

"Oh my god it's a damn chair. Hyde take your chair back." You stand up and move to the floor, arms crossed over your chest. Of course, the guys don't miss the pink flush to your cheeks.

"Nah, I'm good right here." Hyde replies shortly, taking a drink of his beer. As you and Hyde have a staring contest between you and the empty chair, the group is looking at you two like animals in a zoo.

"And here we have the female lioness, asserting her dominance as the male tries to feign attraction." Eric speaks, in a somewhat terrible accent.

"You know what, I'm going to spend time with someone who appreciates my presents and my presence." You smile as you stand up, grabbing the only item left in the grocery bag.

"Oh Mrs. Formannnn~" You yell, running up the stairs. A silence cuts through the basement as everyone stares at Hyde.

"You guys are morons." Hyde sighs, going back to his spot.

"You totally like her!" Jackie yells, a smile on her face.

"Whatever." He leans back, drinking his beer.

"Oh (Y/n) marry me and have my babies!" Fez says as Kelso pretends to kiss someone. Hyde gets up and punches them both in the shoulder before heading to his room. Once Donna hears his bedroom door close, she looks at everyone remaining in frustration.

"If you guys don't stop teasing those two, they will never get together! I mean come on we've seen this coming for a year now." Eric furrows his brows at the girl, confused.

"Wait, you knew they liked each other for a year and didn't tell me?"

"Eric, they've never admitted it. It's just obvious." Fez states, finishing the last of that big bag.

"Actually, we finally got (Y/n) to admit to it kind of. She tried to say it's not a crush yet."

"Well can't we just tell Hyde she likes him so he makes a move?" Kelso scoffs at Eric, making Eric slowly look at the dummy.

"Of course not!"

"That's not a bad idea, but we can't just tell him. After that, we have to figure out a way to get them alone together." Donna adds, trying to figure out how they can execute this plan.

You were currently driving to the Forman's to pick the girls up for a nice dinner which Jackie weirdly offered to pay for. Apparently Donna's parents have been at it again, so she needs an escape. As you park and get out you realize Forman isn't home. You go through the basement door rather loudly.

"Where's my girls?" You call out, waiting for a response. When there was none, you look around confused on their absence. You plop yourself on the couch assuming maybe they're late.

"What are you doing here?" You jump before turning around and seeing the curly headed boy you've grown accustomed to.

"Donna and Jackie were supposed to meet me here to go get dinner but I guess they're late. Or forgot?" You huff, crossing your arms across your chest.

"So that's why you're all dressed up." He decides to turn the tv on before sitting in his chair. You realize a slight shift in his energy as he stares off into the tv, not paying any attention to the show.

"You okay?" He glances over at you before looking back at screen, sighing.

"Yep. Wanna smoke?" You nod and move closer to the arm of the couch. Before long he's back to his usual self, albeit still quiet.

"I can't believe they had me wear a skirt just to not show up for our plans." You huff, leaning on the arm of the couch closer to him.

"Well you look good, we don't see you in skirts a lot." He opens the beer can he got from his hiding spot and took a sip. You feel the heat rise to your face and suddenly you can't stop staring at him.

"Thanks I guess, I usually have to be careful with what I wear around the two pervs. Ever since Kelso got a peek under my homecoming dress freshmen year, I said no short skirts ever again. And thank god Fez doesn't know where I live." He chuckles at that last part giving a nod in agreement.

"I don't think I've been to your place either." He states, looking back at you.

"I mean the only pro is smoking in my room, but that's because it's the attic. You'll have to come over sometime."

"Guess I do." Your eyes drift to his lips and you feel his hand lightly hold your knee.

"I think I want to kiss you." Hyde finally admits, rubbing circles into your knee.

"I think I want you to." He leans in as you close your eyes, feeling him press his lips to yours. You slowly move in sync, trying to lean in closer. His tongue glides against your lips and you part your lips, a sigh escaping you. His hand moves to the side of your neck, tilting your head up as he stands to move next to you on the couch. He pulls away, both of you slightly out of breath.

"Is this okay?" He whispers, you nod in response due to your words failing you. This time you lean in, bringing him into a passionate and deep kiss. He leans you back on the couch as he kisses down your jaw to your neck. A small moan escapes your lips when he lightly bites at the place your shoulder and neck meet, his hand lightly rubbing your exposed waist.

“Steven honey, dinner is ready!” You both quickly pull away from each other, praying she doesn’t come downstairs. Your breathing is jagged as you fix your skirt.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?” Hyde speaks up, looking at you with a smirk.

“Y-yeah, I’ll see you tomorrow.” He kisses you one last time, knocking the wind out of you before heading upstairs. As if right on cue, Donna and Jackie come through the basement door.

“Hey, you ready for dinner?” Donna asks, both trying to hide the smiles on their faces.

“Where have you two been!? I’ve been waiting an hour.” They both smile at you, a knowing look on their faces.

“Oh shoot, we must have given you the wrong time! Well doesn’t matter, looks like you had fun.” As Jackie giggles to herself Donna sits next to you, wondering how you’re blushing even more.

“What are you t-talking about? I’ve just been sitting here.”

“Mhm, and what’s that on your neck?” Jackie grills, making your eyes widen. Your focus shifting between the two girls, staring at their smiling faces. A sigh of defeat leaves you.

“Damn I’m not getting out of this huh?” They drag you off the couch, heading out the door to finally get dinner.

The next day as you stood on the driveway of the Forman’s house you grew nervous to enter. Unfortunately your new buddy on your neck was barely budging with makeup, so the boys are going to see it. Deciding you’d rather not run into Kitty or Red, you head towards the basement door. As you enter, you quickly dart to the couch with a wave. You look up and see just Donna and Eric next to you, his eyes wide.

“Hey uh (Y/n), what’s going on?” His eyes dart between your neck and eyes, trying hard not to stare.

“Not much, I slept in thanks to that dinner last night. That food was crazy.” You look at Donna, reminiscing on crème brulée and crab Rangoon.

“N-not much, cool cool. Hey what’s on your neck there?” The smile on his face is slappable as you smile back.

“What’s it look like?” You test him, waiting for him to crack.

“It looks like a hickey, now who would be giving you a hickey?” He taps his finger against his chin before pointing at you.

“Could it be our very own Hyde?” Your eyes widen slightly before you instantly go back to your smile, this time leaning in a little to meet his face in front of Donna.

“Why don’t you ask him?” You push his forehead away from you hard, earning a groan from the skinny boy.

“You guys act like siblings more than Eric and Laurie.” Donna laughs, pulling her boyfriend back down on the couch before he could go ask Hyde. Like clockwork, Hyde comes downstairs, sodas in hand.

“I don’t know why I had to go get these.” He huffs, putting them on the table before realizing you’re here. He sits down on his chair, staring at you before giving a nod. You smile at him, leaning on the arm of the chair.

What you don’t see is Forman’s shit-eating grin because he was definitely right. Before he can say so however, Kelso and Jackie are barging in already arguing. It doesn’t take long for it to stop when Kelso sees you.

“Oh man Hyde that’s gotta burn!” He laughs, Jackie stepping on his foot.

“Kelso, shut up.” Hyde tries to keep his smirk down, but it slips easily.

“Come on just a few days ago you were offering her your chair and now she comes here with a hickey!” You’re bright red at this point, begging anyone with your eyes to get him to shut up.

“Kelso think about that very slowly. The day with the chair, remember anything else that happened? Like maybe yesterday?” Donna speaks like he’s a preschooler, which kind of works. You watch the wheels turn in his head, gears shifting as he looks between everyone before gasping.

“Oh my god, they’re doing it!” Kelso jumps earning a slap on the shoulder from Jackie.

“Kelso, we’re not doing it.” Hyde huffs, annoyed with all his friends.

“…yet.” You mumble, only Donna and Hyde hearing you.

“What so-“

“Kelso shut the hell up and sit down.” He sighs and sits on the arm of the couch closest to the chair Jackie is in.

“Where’s Fezzy boy?” You ask, not feeling the usual feeling of him staring.

“He should be here soon, something about his foster parents trying to get him baptized.” Eric speaks up, clearly amused. You giggle a little at the thought before resting your head in your hand propped on the couch arm.

“You okay?” Donna asks, getting Hyde’s attention. She rubs your shoulder a little for comfort as your head sinks into your hand.

“Just tired, you think Kitty would let me go sleep in Laurie’s room since she’s ‘scouting schools with a girlfriend’ or will Red stop her?” You smile lazily at Donna, earning a laugh from her.

“With that hickey, I think she’d stop you for questioning first.” You sigh and sit up straight, trying to wake up a little.

“Maybe circle time will wake you up.” Eric interjects, shaking a brown baggie.

“Dude, anyone tell you you have bug eyes?” You giggle and poke at Eric’s face.

“And she’s awake!” He grabs your finger and puts it down, chuckling at you.

“You know, I never saw you as a hickey girl (Y/n), thought you must’ve been a prude if you didn’t want me.” Both Hyde and Jackie punch either arm, causing Kelso to jerk back in his chair.

“You started the circle without me!?” Fez sits on the floor in front of you, pouting slightly.

“Sorry man, she was totally about to fall asleep.” Donna says, braiding a small section of your hair. You giggle and pat the boy in front of you’s head.

“(Y/n) come here.” Hyde says in a low tone, everyone else talking amongst themselves. You lean in closer to hear him.

“What’s up?” You try to look at his eyes through the sunglasses with no luck.

“Why don’t you come sit with me? Just so no one’s on the floor you know?” You blush as you look at him.

“A-are you sure?” He nods and you stand, tapping Fez to take your spot. Once he sits on the couch, you sit on the edge of Hyde’s lap. Soon, he’s pulling you into him, keeping an arm around your waist while the other lays on your knee. Your friends all stare but say nothing, not wanting to scare you off like last time. It would be hard though when all you can concentrate on is the feeling of his warm skin on yours and his breath fanning your neck.

“When did this happen?” Fez asks, mostly excited but slightly sad as well.

“Last night.” Hyde responds, causing a blush on your face as you look around the room for reactions.

“We’ll still have our weekly dinners, right (N/n)?” The boy on the couch asks you, making you rub his shoulder and smile.

“You mean us going to the candy store and spending way too much just to eat it all in one night? Yes fez, I’m not abandoning our sugar addiction.” He pumps his fist and is all smiles now.

“I didn’t know you and Fez were close?” Hyde asks you, rubbing your knee.

“Yeah, gotta make sure you boys aren’t tainting him. Specifically Kelso.” He nods and leaves a peck on your cheek.

“Okay I know we planned this but did we think about us having to be around it?” Jackie asks, huffing as kelso laughs.

“Jackie how many times have one of us walked in on you and Michael smacking on the couch?” You say, shuddering slightly at the memory.

“She’s got you there babe.” Kelso smiles at her before she slaps his shoulder.

“What so are you guys official? Or just messing around?” Donna asks, before realizing this conversation is missing something.

“You know what you come with me.” Donna points at you and ushers you both up the stairs.

“Donna why did we need to go upstairs for this?”

“Is that my favorite daughter?" you hear kitty in the other room and your eyes go wide. As you’re lead to the kitchen, kitty looks at you and instantly her smile is wider and she’s clapping and laughing.

“Finally you two happened! I’m assuming the plan worked?” Kitty asks Donna, receiving a nod from the redhead.

“Wait you had Mrs. kitty help you?”

“Just had her call Hyde up so we could be alone with you for the interrogation.” You all three sit at the dining table, kitty putting out cookies that you gladly take.

“So, are you two official?” Kitty asks, pushing the cookies closer to you.

“I mean I guess not? We didn’t talk about it. We were just watching tv while I waited for the girls, and he said he wanted to kiss me.” You take another cookie.

“But he’s practically all over you. At least as much as Hyde can be.” Donna says, looking at Kitty.

“He told her to share his chair so Fez could sit on the couch instead of the floor.” Kitty gasps and claps in excitement again.

“Honey he is smitten, he never cares about the boys’ comfort.” You think about it before the pink comes back to your face again today. If you keep blushing it may end up permanent.

“I mean I know he’s not good at talking about feelings, so I don’t wanna ask. I’d rather just let it happen.” You grab a third cookie before standing up, ready to head back downstairs.

Little did you know, Jackie was leading the interrogation downstairs, knowing the boys would mess it up somehow.

“So Hyde, are you gonna ask her out or what?” She asks, the boys looking between her and Hyde.

“I don’t know man.” He shrugs, causing Jackie to stand up.

“Well you gotta figure it out. If you actually like her you have to ask her. I know Michael and Eric told you how (Y/n) feels and I may not like her but she’s better company than you and I don’t want her all sad when we’re supposed to be talking about me!”

“She doesn’t seem sad to me.” You walk down the stairs, cookie still in hand.

“I’m back!” You move to sit with Hyde again, ignoring the empty spot Donna was in.

“Wait there’s cookies?” Fez and Kelso instantly stand up, dragging Jackie and Eric with them.

“Man they’re annoying.” Hyde sighs, stealing a pinch of cookie.

“Yep, we have pretty annoying friends. And family, apparently Kitty was in on it.” You look at him, leaning his head back over the chair. He looks back up at you and draws circles into your waist.

“Oh well, wanna go to the hub?” The look in his eyes is a tad newer, slight worry and suddenly you realize he’s asking you out.

“Little cliche but I’ll let it slide. Come on.” You stand from his lap and lean down to give him a kiss as you pull him up. The smile on your face says everything as he wraps his arm around you and lead you to the door.

[affectionatelyrs]

Can You See Me? (I'm Waiting for the Right Time)

RWRB | T | 7.2k | One Shot

Tags - AU - Roommates/Housemates, Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Humor, Mutual Pining, Love Confessions

Summary

“Whose turn was it?” Henry asks while Alex is busy pondering the merits of throwing himself out their fifth-story window and hoping his boner doesn’t take anyone’s eye out on his way down. “Forgive me, but I am a bit tired. Do you think you could take it?” There’s no way that Henry’s not doing this on purpose. He makes words mean things when put in a certain order for a living, for fucks sake. Alex almost quips back depends on how big it is just to see how—or if—Henry would react. “Yeah, um, no problem.” There. Much more normal. He could steal Henry’s job at this rate. “Truth or dare?”

Or, Alex’s world gets flipped on its axis during a game of truth or dare

This was so much fun to write - I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't smiling during a lot of it. I haven't posted in so long, so I'm both excited and nervous to be getting back to it. I hope that y'all enjoy this one! :) Read it here

[ivormybeloved]

Okay maybe i should do more rants about my MCSM AU ideas bc like. I have a LOT and then a month later I see someone mention an idea like it and I missed my chance 😭 so let's just clear up a few things

WARNING: some things may be triggering to some, so if you don't like mentions of kidnapping, death, religious themes, and a few other serious topics then these stories are not for you.

THE GREATEST SHOW UNEARTHED [Main themes: Imagination, Greif, Kidnapping] — this au is based on the song The Greatest Show Unearthed. The current story at time of posting this is: Ivor and his son, Jesse, visit a carnival. They soon get wrapped up in the plans of the evil ringmaster (Romeo) who steals and manipulates children to join his circus. At day, it's a normal and fun wonderland. At night, it's a horrific, gorey freakshow filled with some unimaginable horrors. This is the first AU of mine where Ivor is (FOR ONCE) a good dad (not counting me and Br0ken's rewrite AU. That one takes 2nd place)

DELUSION [Main themes: Religious Trauma, corrupt society, coping mechanisms] — Every character in this story is an experiment that either has or is based on some sort of disorder/disability. Not all depictions may be accurate, but I'm planning on doing more research. The scientist and made all of these creatures is Ivor, The Creator. He's treated as a god and even sees himself as such. Our World's Delusions is not the official writing and is only hints at the future story + random ideas I have that I write out so that y'all can see them. The writing is on AO3. THIS STORY IS CURRENTLY BEING REWRITTEN!!!

TOYMAKER [Main themes: Death, Paranoia, Greif, Loss, Drug use] — This AU doesn't have much story currently!

FEARS/PHOBIA [Main theme: Suicide, getting over fears, Mental health] — This AU is mainly just major death. In this AU, each of the characters represent a phobia that Jesse has. Jesse starts killing all of them, trying to free himself from paranoia. Along the way, he gets tired of it. He tries to befriend some fears but soon kills them still. After becoming fearless and killing Romeo (the fear of death) he takes his own life.

FUGITIVE AU — this was a ship AU I had made because I was sad there was barely any Jailbirds (Reginald x Milo) content. The main idea: Milo would steal items and basically commit various crimes for Build Club. He'd get arrested sometimes, but was let go as no one had any evidence that it was actually him who committed the crime. When in jail, he'd talk to Reginald quite a bit and they seemed to get along. Isa, however, was tired of these constant crimes and the fugitive going unpunished, so she ordered Reginald to do whatever he could to capture them. Once Reginald successfully captured Milo, Isa sentanced the criminal to death by void. Reginald tries to protest, claiming that the punishment is much too harsh, but Isa doesn't listen and instead orders the guards to arrest Reginald with charge of treason. Reginald and Milo end up falling off of the island together mid-battle and fall to the island. Reginald wants to find a way back up and talk some sense into Isa, but Milo is completely ECSTATIC and only agrees to find a way back up when Milo remembers Build Club

ALIEN AU — random PolyOrder AU I thought of because of a narrative writing prompt at school 😭. The Old Order are pretty much just are aliens from a planet that is mainly just The End. They crash on Earth and the only person who doesn't like the new world is Soren. They decide to stay on the planet and study the world. They meet a human (Gabriel) and he helps them learn more about the world. Depending on how I feel about the writing, I may post a chapter or two.

BIOMES AU — one-off idea I had. Each of the characters are celestial beings (or gods/admins) that rule over specific biomes. A collab AU with @thegreatnure, if you have any questions you can also ask them about this AU!! The story isn't complete yet, but the main characters are the YouTubers. There's all sorts of discord amongst the gods that needs to be fixed.

AXOLOTL AU — little AU where the Adventure Trio (after Jack is killed in season 2) are revived as axolotl's and are found by Ivor after the Older Order breaks up. It's a small AU idea I had to while talking to @/thegreatnure—THE SECOND FIC I'VE EVER POSTED!!!!

HIGH SCHOOL AU — collab au with @/br0ken-camera! It's exactly what it sounds like. There's not much story to this other than little headcanons that I'll post about sometimes

TRAILS AU — This is an AU I thought of a while ago. The story follows M!Jesse and F!Jessi, Player One and Player Two. They explore a puzzle filled game and interact with the different residents of the world. They find out what happened to the game and why development had ended. A virus had intruded the game and then the characters started acting odd, that was what they were told.

I will update when I make another AU or change something. Other than that, have a good day!!

WHITE PUMPKIN IVOR — so. third AU I've ever worked on. It's pretty much what it sounds like and I might rewrite it sometime in the future.

MODERN AU — Now, I know this isn't exactly an original idea. BUT! I wanted to put my own spin on a little modern AU. I'll post about it on occasion but probably barely.

[ilovechuuy4]

Hello!! I really loved your writing style and I was wondering if you could do bsd characters going shopping with gn!reader 🤭 like what they’d buy and do at the store?

A/N: hai! Hello! So when i read this I wasn’t sure if you wanted headcanons or scenarios so a did a bit of both! Some characters don’t have scenarios but if you want any specific character(s) feel free to request again! This might take longer than anything because I am working on two other things! But I’ll try my best to get it out as soon as possible and I really hope you like it! (There is a little bit of all characters from ADA, PM, & DOA) I'm also trying it to post stuff AS often and just take breaks between posts so please bare with me! (I also wasn't sure if you wanted it to be a friend thing or not.. 😭

Headcanons❀

Armed Detective Agency

Characters; Dazai, Yosano, Atsushi

Dazai🐌

•cuponer. For sure but not because he doesn't want to spend money it's just because he is broke(he lost his wallet in the river remember?

• He would try getting you into goodwill. But if you refuse he's making you pay (he would get you like.. Two things from more expensive places w kunikida's wallet)

Yosano🦋

• She goes all out for you getting you anything you want and then she goes to get food with you(basically giving you royalty treatment)

•She will end up spending over 1000 dollars for sure, 500 for you and 500 for her, all her money too

Atsushi 🐯

• He wouldnt know exactly what to get you but he would try helping

• Atsushi is the one to see something he would think you would look good in and ask "what about this one? It would look nice on you"

Port Mafia

Characters; Chuuya, Akutugawa & Gin (together

Chuuya🍷

• he definitely has big money, buying you all the fancy and expensive things. Any store you wanna go to he will (def recommending things for your too)

• Y'all will be at the store for hours on end trying on different things getting the perfect outfit(s) for you

Akutugawa & Gin🔪

• Gin is helping you find everything and akutugawa is paying since akutugawa isn't too social anyways

• Akutugawa would probably recommend two or three places he shops at but that's all, meanwhile gin is running around with you helping find things that fit you well

Decay of Angels

Characters; Fyodor, Bram

Fyodor📖

• he would just pay he wouldn't help you too much. Maybe recommend some places but that's about it.

• he would want you to buy a lot if stuff so he could just spoil you (he's def not into shopping with that one fucking shit)

Bram🧛‍♂️

• Bram def drags you into hot topic if you drag him into more preppy places (he'd pay for everything

• the moment y'all walk into the store he is already be tired after one store

Scenarios

characters; Dazai O, Chuuya N, Fyodor D.

Dazai🐌

Yours and Dazai's shopping trips were usual thrift stores or goodwill stops(but like.. Thrift store have GOOD stuff) but today's was different. Dazai had told you he took Kunkida's wallet, you was worried but he said it was fine because he did it a lot, but was it REALLY okay? Okay maybe it was okay. Don't get anyone wrong, stealing is wrong but. Kunikida knew how Dazai was for sure this basically happened daily. So you just went on with it, just this day.

About a few hours pass, y'all had ate, went to the usual thrift shops AND the mall stopping by various places (whatever stores you like) Your hands were full of bags and you were ready to go home, but Dazai wanted to bring you to one more place, a jewelry store.. Y'all entered and everything was different prices ranges the most expensive around 30k and the lowest was around 4k, but they all looked like, couple/friendship rings/necklaces/bracelets so maybe that was the reason it was SO expensive.

A few minutes of wondering and then something caught Dazai's eye. It was gold matching rings, they look so, beautiful yet of course so expensive. But Dazai didn't use Kunikida's card, he pulled out another. It was his own, he then got his finger sized and your finger sized. If it wasn't obvious to you now, it was clearly obvious when he slides the matching ring on his finger and the other on yours.

Dazai placed a gently kiss on your soft (h/c) hair, running his fingers through it right after. He loved you dearly and it showed, he used his saved and limited money to buy you and him something personal. It had yalls initials ingraved on them on the outside, and in the inside was the date y'all started dating. It was simple yet so loving. "I really love you, babe" he spoke smooth and slowly, placing a soft kiss on your lips.

Chuuya🍷

One day on Chuuya's day off, he decided to drag you to the mall to get you more clothing (he just wanted to spoil you and that's exactly what he did.) Yall were in the mall from 11am to 4pm, trying on clothes, finding accessories, getting you anything you wanted at this point. He loved you dearly and he just wanted to spoil you today.

His hand was clasping yours tightly as he brought you to clothing stores, candy shops, anywhere throughout the big mall, carrying you when your legs hurt. He was such a good boyfriend and it showed SO much, it was so nice to see his love he has towards you. And at the end of the day you both were pretty tired it was around 4:30pm, y'all stayed at the mall for 5 hours, which is obviously too long of time to be in a mall, yall's hands full of bags, small, big, medium, all different sizes of bags from different places and stores.

At the end of the day y'all were walking to the car, loading everything inside when Chuuya came up hugging you from behind. His head nuzzling into the back of your neck. "I have a surprise for you" Chuuya mumbles against your skin. He then let's go and quickly goes around the car.

When Chuuya came back, he had a big bouquet of (fav flowers) and a couple bags of (fav candy) along with a small-ish box it could either hold a ring or a necklace. Chuuya gently held out the items waiting for you to take them. Once you did, you slowly open the box. It was a small necklace. There was a heart shaped pendant hanging on the necklace with a picture of you and Chuuya. Chuuya slowly brought you into a love full hug, holding you close, swaying the both if you back and forth. Placing a soft kiss apon your head. "Happy one year, sweetheart.." He said calmly, holding you close to his chest as you hug back.

Fyodor📖

You walk into a designer store (what ever one) browsing the multiple things on shelves, hangers, folded up on racks. They all looked so expensive but your boyfriend, Fyodor, told you he wanted to spoil you tonight even if everything was expensive. He had his arm drapped around your waist as y'all walked through and past multiple designer clothes and accessories. You felt bad if you got anything but he DID say get what you want. So you grabbed a shirt or three and a few accessories, which was around 5k..

This went on for about two or three hours stopped by ANY designer shop Fyodor thought was nice. Y'all had about three different bags from designer places and theyre probably was total of 20k spent tonight. You felt bad that Fyodor was spending so much money on you for no reason but you didn't want to ruin anything. Once y'all had decided y'all were done shopping, y'all had went to go eat. It was a resovation at a fancy restaurant. Fyodor planned this night like it meant everything to him.

Y'all had finished the food and when y'all walked out the restaurant, you heard Fyodor call your name. He seemed a decent feet back from you but y'all were in the cross walk so you said give you a minute and he shouldn't stop in the middle on the crosss walk. And once y'all arrived at the car, Fyodor called out your name once more he was much closer now but he seemed well, lower?

When you turned around, you saw your boyfriend's purple eyes looking up at you from where he kneels on one knee on the ground. A beautiful ring in a small red velvet colored box, open and pointed towards you. The ring itself looked even more expensive than the clothes y'all had bought today. The top was covered and small diamonds, how much did Fyodor exactly spend? But that wasn't the point right now, Fyodor spoke up, his thick Russian accent present. "Darling, will you marry me? Please? I want you to be with me my entire life, I love you so much, Mota lyubov"

A/N: I'M REALLY SORRY IF I DIDN'T LIKE.. PUT THE CHARACTERS YOU WANTED OR IT DIDN'T TURN OUT WELL PLEASE TELL ME IF I DID GOOD I'M A PEOPLE PLEASURE AND I FEEL LIKE STRESSED IT IK IT DID WRONG SO, PLEASE TELL ME IF YOU LIKE THIS OR LIKE, YOU WANTED A DIFF CHARACTER IF YOU DO FEEL FREE TO REQUEST AGAIN!

[venusxsturnio]

FIGHTING TEMPTATIONS

PAIRINGღ chris x christian!fem!reader

SUMMARYღ what happens when a super horny, but holy, y/n's dreams of having sex with her boyfriend and gives into the temptation?

FROM VENUSღ hi guys! wassup, how are we ding this morning? good. well I'M NOT! THEY TOOK AWAY THE BOOPS! i'm so sorry for that, anyways.....lmk what y'all think. ✿ btw this was a request. lowkey i don't even know how a relationship with a christian even works...so lmk if i got sumthin wrong, but remember my requests are always open! and remember i love criticism. :)

WARNINGSღfluff...christianity...cussing...SMUT(i don't know what i'm doing)

not proofread!

Y/N POV

i was on chris's lap. we were on the edge of the bed. he was so smooth. his soft lips sucking the skin on my neck. i let out a soft moan, as he hit my sweet spot. instinctively my hips started to grind, on his clothed hard-on.

i gasped as i was awoken by chris shaking me. i started blushing. "What's wrong baby?" chris said with tired eyes. "Nothing..." i said slightly disappointed, as i wanted for that dream to become real so bad, but i knew the rules. And i had to obey them. "Come on let's get ready." i told chris. but he looked at me with confusion. i returned the expression. "You didn't forget did you?" i asked. he scoffed, playing it off as if he didn't. but i knew he did. "No..." i rolled my eyes playfully as i got out of bed and walked into the bathroom. "Yeah...whatever you say..." i did my morning routine.

then moved onto my facial. next i started taking my clothes off. i grabbed my outfit and put it on. i walked out of the bathroom to a fully dressed chris. da- oops. lord forgive me. phew, i'm sorry but that is one good looking man. and him. in that suit. "Babe." i said biting my lip. i thought back to that dream from earlier, it's like i could feel the presence of his lips on my skin, even when they weren't. "Yes..." he said dragging his words a bit. "Nothing. Come on." we finished getting the last of our things as we left the house. we got into the car. chris started the car and we slowly pulled out of the driveway.

NARRATION

as y/n sat beside chris in the car, he reaches his hand over and caresses your thigh on their way to church, the atmosphere was serene and silent, the hum of the engine being the only sound filling the space between them. yet, despite the tranquility of the moment, y/ns mind was anything but calm.

with every passing mile, thoughts of chris flooded her mind, each glance stealing her breath away. the gentle curve of chris's jawline, the way his eyes sparkled in the morning light, it was all y/n could think about. as they sat in silence, y/n couldn't help but wonder, what if the dream became real? The anticipation of the church service ahead was overshadowed by the whirlwind of emotions swirling within y/n, leaving them lost in a reverie of longing and uncertainty.

y/n and chris arrived at the church, the service was already underway. despite the familiar hymns and reverent atmosphere, y/n found it impossible to focus on anything but chris. his presence seemed to fill the entire space, eclipsing everything else. thoughts of him consumed her mind, drowning out the prayers and sermons echoing through the sanctuary.

she couldn't shake the memory of the dream she had about him last night, the vivid images lingering in her consciousness. In the midst of the sacred surroundings, y/n was lost in a whirlwind of longing and desire, unable to tear her gaze away from chris, who sat beside her, oblivious to the storm raging within her soul.

as the service concluded, y/n and chris said their goodbyes and exited the church, they entered the car and pulled off. the weight of unspoken emotions lingering between them. chris's concern was palpable as they settled into the car, his inquiry about her well-being met with a deflective response from y/n. with each passing mile on the journey home, the tension in the air grew thicker, suffocating y/n with the weight of her unspoken desires.

they finally reached their destination. home. y/ns sudden desires had a hold on her. a strong one, one that she couldn't let go of. they exited their car and made their way into the house. walking upstairs to their room. they changed out of their clothes, getting ready to take showers. once done they both sat on the bed. y/n reading a book, and chris scrolling on his phone.

finally, unable to resist any longer, y/n threw caution to the wind, ignoring all rules as she made a bold move on chris. in a moment of recklessness and raw passion, she leaned in, capturing his lips with her own, finally surrendering to the overwhelming pull she felt towards him. she threw her book somewhere in the room, as she straddled on top of chris.

Y/N POV

chris pulled away slowly. "Babe...what the hell. I thought you couldn't do that stuff." chris said a confused expression coming across his face. "I'm sorry. I can't help it. I had a dream last night and ever since, I can't get you out of my head." i said looking down at my hands, fidgeting with them. i felt chris's hand taking place on my chin, as he slowly lifted it up, so that our eyes met each others gaze.

i closed the gap between us connecting our lips. i felt heat go to an area i've never felt before.

NARRATION

chris trails his palms up your thighs slowly, approaching your waist and giving it a tight squeeze. before moving his hands any further down your body, he gave you a look, as if he was asking for permission. you gave him a slight nod, before he jumped back into the kiss.

chris found his way from your lips to your cheek. his lips leaving a trail of red marks along your skin. you let out a soft moan, which caused him to lead his fingers down to your heat. you let out another moan, but it was louder this time. he slid his hands into your shorts, then he pushes your underwear to the side, as he flicks his thumb over your clit just to hear the loud yelp you make. "Chris!" you scream, you could feel his smirk against your skin.

he moved his way to your revealed chest area. he continued to play with your clit as he sucked on the top area of your breast. his eyes shot up, he gave you a deadly stare as you threw your head back. you bit your lips to hold back the sounds you were making. "Open up baby. I wanna hear those pretty moans." chris said as he ripped your top that you had on, to reveal your perky breasts, which caused you to gasp. "Damn." chris said holding back a chuckle. chris leaned down, as he started licking your nipple.

"Please Chris.." you whined. you needed him so badly. "All this begging…" he trails his open hand over your nipple, and started flicking and messaging it, "for me?" You nod frantically, causing your head to lift up, making you meet eyes with chris. you head fell back again as his lips met your breasts once more.

"Yes...Chris...please...just fuck me already!" you shout, in need of chris. you wanted him. you needed him. you picked your head up and looked at him. finally giving you a sense of relief, chris slides his two long, meaty fingers through your folds. they slipped in so smoothly, your slick, substituting as lubricant.

your back arched as you let out a moan so loud it filled the whole house. you were experiencing something you never have before. and it felt good. your hips started to grind in sync with his fingers, as they curled inside of you. chris breathes, placing one palm on the side of your ass.

you focus on the smooth sensation of chris's fingers on the throbbing of your heat. when chris slows the pace of his fingers inside of you, the disappointment in your face shows. "Don't worry baby...I got you." chris exits his fingers and pulls your shorts and underwear down in one smooth and swift motion. then he slips his own sweats and boxers off the same way he did yours.

you watch in awe as his long, and hard dick flings out, hitting his stomach. he pumps himself a few times before finally slips himself into you it’s with ease. he stares at your body once it’s in. he hooks his fingers on your bra clasp and looks up at you for approval. “can i?” you nod, he removes your bra, throwing it somewhere on the floor.

he cups your boobs almost immediately and starts flicking your nipples again. you moan softly as he places one of your nipples into his mouth. the other being caressed by his hand. his tongue flicks around with your nipple as he sucks on it. this results in you moaning loudly.

chris pushes himself into at an even faster pace now. you whine loudly. “c- close.” he smirks, “yea? you close? cum on my dick.” you feel an unfamiliar knot in you stomach and start moaning louder. you yell out, “holy shit...i- im gonna cum!” he covers your mouth and shakes his head. "hold it, don’t cum without me.”

you scream from the insane amount of pleasure going through you and cum all over his cock. he follows shortly behind you, pulling out and shoots his sticky liquid all over your stomach. he plops down beside you, breathing slowly but heavily.

he slowly leans over and kisses your forehead. he gets up from the bed and walks into the bathroom. he comes out with a warm wet cloth, and walks over to you and proceeds to clean you off then himself. he walks over to your closet to get you both a new pair of clothes.

you both put on your clothes and sit back on the bed cuddling. you look up at him with sad eyes. "What's wrong baby?" chris said, his voice filled with sympathy. "I-it's just that...i feel bad.." you said putting your head down, playing with your hands. chris lifted his hand to your chin, and lifted it up to meet your eyes gaze. "About what?" chris said. you could see it in his eyes, that they were filled with love.

"I feel bad...because, we weren't supposed to do this." you said trying to hold back the tears that were forming in your eyes. "But baby...you couldn't help it." chris said moving his hand from your chin to your cheek, and slowly caressing it. "Yea... But, biblically were not suppose to do it until were married." you said your voice being filled with guilt, as the actions you just acted felt like a weight on your shoulders.

chris cupped your face with both of his hands and leaned in to give you a quick peck on the forehead. he parted from your face and looked at you in the eyes. "Listen baby...even if what you did was wrong, I'm sure God still sees you as the perfect child in his eyes." chris said giving you a small smile of reassurance. you returned the smile. you leaned into his body as you two laid there and cuddled for the rest of the day.

FROM VENUSღ hey guyssss! how was it?!? did i do good? pls don't hate me if some of you don't agree with this choice!! don't forget requests/dm's are open :)

credits: @slut4chriss

[dumpofletterz]

Are you gonna make a part 2 of the favorite position? 🧍🧍 I oove your account already

───FAVORITE POSITIONS (2)

BBBGLX adults and their favorite positions...to fuck you. ❥ Headcanons + small imagines, gender neutral reader

WARNINGS: nsfw (mdni my ass Ik damn well y'all ignore this, still be warned though.) , biting, rough (more on retak'ka..), shitty writing

Characters: Vargoba, Retak'ka, Hang Kasa (young-adult), Maripos.

Females: soon.

───Vargoba.

this man has FOUR arms. despite being a literal ruthless evil does who'd beat you up and steal your power sphere, he's somehow quite the opposite when it comes to his partner. missionary.

You whined and writhed, your hole clenching around him, “Please… my tummy, it’s too full…” he has his one hand holding your thighs, the other holding the back of your head while the rest grip on to the side of the table. you have been going at it for several hours with no stop, he has tried his best to be soft with you. fucking with him feels unironically comfortable. "Just a few more and we'll be done." turns out it weren't.

───Retak'ka.

He's the opposite of vargoba, he'd be ruthless w/ you in bed. "i will not use my elemental split, it is weak." my ass, he'd use that when he pounds you up. c'mon, he's dominance if it was incarnated. one way to say.. gangbang. (i'm laughing for no reason help)

He'd usually go for only dual, could turn into triple or more depending on his mood... yeah, he'd go for triple. Next thing you'll know is there are three retak'ka's surrounding you, one in your back gripping your thighs harshly, one in front of you keeping your mouth shut with his bare hands covering your mouth, and another just beside you waiting for his next turn, acting like he can't just interrupt the other two by participating immediately. you can't really move at this point as they're literally in control of you─pounding you like there is no tommorow. “don’t give me that look." he would say after having you creampied for the fifth time, you can't even tell which element was speaking when your mind was at it's limit. "awn you think you can cum? don't even try." he groaned into your ear with such a condescending tone, laughing at you. your hole only knew the color white, it being tight no matter how much cock already entered it.

───Hang Kasa. (fluffy smut)

he's a walking greenflag, honestly. it's either you simply cockwarm him or cuddle fucking. (young kasa is so adorable. y'all should read the extra episode of the compilation comics to see him).

Just thinking of him hugging you while you're sitting on his lap. you've been wanting him since he left, whining everytime you see him to reassure that you're being needy. “Darling…” it almost sounded like a warning but even he didn't seem sure of it. a small huff came from mouth when you slowly sat on his lap and pushed the tip to your tight hole. he doesn't know what kind of thoughts you're having such as him using his crystal powers while banging you. "you've been tired from meeting the other elementals. let me help you." you said, trying your best at puppy eyes so he'd agree. and he did, you're now towered by him as he softly pounds your ass. "k-kasa, please," you pleaded, your nails digging into the his skin. “please what?” "go a little faster."

───Maripos.

yk how this guy can literally clone himself? yeah that one. i swear to you this guy loves any position where he could hold your hips while fucking you relentlessly. he'd be into double penetration...both of him having to grip your hips while making you squirm.

He's so pretty that you'd forget that he's currently pounding you, forcing yourself to not make a noise while he’s fucking you because he'd tease you if you do. "that's it pretty, don't give me noises unless you want me to stop." he'd say while he's the one being so vocal to the point where people from outside could hear all the unholy things you've been doing. "yah—yuh—yeah—gonna make you dumb—mh—all mine. fuck-" he breathes out, gritting his teeth on your shoulder while the other one just kept moaning and huffing. "shiiiitt! haa-hhah- fuuckk... Good" thrust. "pretty." thust. "fill'ya up." thrust. the aggressive way his cock thrusts into you, making you whimper, brushing against your G-spot and making your insides clench around the waves of pleasure.

NOTE: guys I also write fluffy, softy, cutesy, and all dovey headcanons/fics--both for the youngs and adults.

( I NEED PEOPLE TO REQUEST ME FOR TALES OF ARCADIA I AM BEGGING. )

[aranock]

Just had someone claim that I maliciously stole ideas from a friend without acknowledgong them when said friend is litterally in the video, and I was in the video I supposedly took thing from, despite my not even once thinking about either thing as being even remotely similar. Like not even slightly an influence. Also I am pretty open about when something influenced me. I don't exactly hide it. Idk I feel like people are really stretching to find anything they can hate Jessie and I for this video with. Like really? Really?

Anyway just to be clear The Editor is not a ripoff of my friend Neil from The Leftist Cooks video on metamodernism, great video btw go watch it. I wrote the editor in because as I was doing the script editing proccess on Jessies initial script and came up with a new structure and worried that if I didnt draw attention to this people would maliciously misinterpret part 1 without getting to the part 2 twist. The Editor is LITTERALLY representing what I did in the script editing proccess for this video. Though there role and purpose expanded to represent more broadly what editing and editors do to works, reinforcing the points we make on art as collaborative and the importance of the influence of for example Marcia Lucas on making the original trilogy as good as it was. If there was any inspiration for The Editor it was chatting with my friend @wonderful101gecs about Pathologic and Brechtian Epic Theatre. I wanted to disallow the audience from suspension of disbelief and force them to reconcile with the world as it is and with how narratives are manufactured. Even then its pretty loose inspiration. The Editor was just a natural result of needing a purpose fulfilled and rounding out my layers within layers structure. Im not sure if it was Jessie or I that named them that, but we made them a named character because we worried at one point early on if we didnt do that people might get really shitty towards me. Like originally in the script it was just "Aranock" and as they became a character I pushed it further towards them being a sort of amoral embodiment of concepts masquerading as a villain who was masquerading as a Hero, pretendint to be the great person behind everything. Thus I came to "oh I need a second rug pull" and thats where layer 5 came from because I needed to really REALLY make the audience go "oh I need to question the narrative" and not treat The Editor as the great man myth. Layer 1, the animation, came from a desire to have a narrative layer below the documentary and video essay layers, below any meta layer. So yeah originally this was just a long very direct essay by Jessie about the making of and politics of star wars, my reediting of those become layer 2 and 3, with some small bits of those ending up in layer 4. Oh also some elements of what became the editor and of the script existed before I even began my youtube channel. Like I have been kicking around aspects of these ideas for over 3 years. The Editors opening monologue is almost all from something I wrote about a year before releasing my first video. So yeah I was not stealing stuff from a video by my friend that released last year, and frankly its really shitty that people assume that of me.

Also I'm tired of how frequently people have been specifying out just me to be shitty about. Attacking my voice for being feminine, being weird about my body. Really makes me feel great. Love being a trans woman making art on the internet. Love how y'all attack me if my voice sounds how you perceive womens voices should sound and you attack me when it doesnt. Im tired people suck, and its really weird that some of you want me to sound more "manly", but thanks for the validating my self taught voice training I guess????

[shadowpeachceo]

Ninjago incorrect quotes I'm having too much fun

Nya: Alright, who’s hogging the Netflix account? I’ve been locked out all week!

Lloyd: Sucks to suck! I’m already on the 8th season of Friends!

Kai: Not me.

Nya: Don’t lie. I know it’s not Jay or Zane.

Kai: It’s not me, really!

Nya: …

Kai: …But it might be Ronin…

Nya: You gave Ronin access to our Netflix account!?!?

Kai: he wanted to watch Orange is the New Black!

Nya: I’m going to kill you.

*The team at Home Depot*

Nya: *pushed in the cacti display while wandering around the garden section*

Jay: *Shitting in the display toilets*

Kai: *Tokyo Drifting one of those flatbed carts down the aisles*

Lloyd: *Stealing paint chips for aesthetic purposes*

Zane: *Just wanted some goddamn lightbulbs and everyone ruined it*

Cole: *In the car sleeping*

*The team is asked what they would do with 5 children with only 3 chairs.*

Cole: Get two more chairs!

Nya: They can get their own chairs.

Jay: Make them fight for it.

Zane: You only need one chair to beat them all with.

Lloyd: I would never be near children.

Kai: Kill two.

Zane: A mouse!

Kai, pulling out a knife: Go back to where you came from or I'll stab you.

Nya, pulling out a frying pan: It'll make a nice meal!

Lloyd, giving the mouse cheese: You deserve a treat, little guy.

Cole, gasping: It's Ratatouille!

Jay: His name is Remi, dummy.

Zane: ...I was going to say to just trap it and throw it out the window... what is wrong with you people.

Lloyd: So, did everyone learn their lesson?

Jay: No.

Kai: I did not.

Cole: I may have actually forgotten one.

Nya: Also no.

Lloyd: Oh good, neither did I.

Zane: *Exhausted sigh*

Zane: We’re kind of missing something guys.

Kai: Cohesion?

Lloyd: Teamwork?

Nya: A general sense of what we’re doing?

Cole: And Jay is not here.

Kai: Oh, and that, yeah.

Zane: Stressed.

Cole: Depressed.

Lloyd: Possessed.

Nya: Obsessed.

Jay: Impressed.

Kai: Chicken breast.

Everyone: ...What?

Kai: I just wanted to join in.

Zane: You know, when Nya comes over, Jay can get a little…

Cole: Psycho?

Kai: Scary?

Lloyd: Drunk?

Zane: All three.

Before Lloyd joins the team

Jay: The floor is lava!

Cole: *helps Zane onto the counter*

Nya: *kicks Kai off the sofa*

Kai: *lays on the floor*

Jay: ...Are you okay?

Kai: No.

Jay: What's worse than a heartbreak?

Nya: Waking up in the morning and your phone wasn't charging.

Lloyd: Waking up in the morning.

Cole: Waking up.

Kai: Waking up in the morning...

Kai: And seeing Zane.

Zane: Hey! Rude!!

Squad reactions to being called straight:

Kai: The fuck, no I'm not.

Nya: Excuse the hell out of you?

Zane: Ding dong, you are wrong!

Lloyd: Who told you that? And why did they lie?

Jay: Rude.

Cole: *punches the person*

Jay: *standing at the top of the stairs* What are y'all doing at the bottom of the staircase?

Zane: I accidentally fell down.

Cole: KAI PUSHED ME down the stairs because I refuse to pay THEIR part of our rent!

Nya: Zane bet me fifty bucks that I couldn't reach the bottom of the stairs faster than they did falling down it, so I slide down the banister to get my money.

Lloyd: I don't know how I got here. One moment, I was sleeping in my bed, three floors up, and then suddenly I was waking up here, just in time to get crushed by Nya.

*The squad's reaction to being told they're the chosen one*

Nya: I will not let you down.

Zane: Sounds fun.

Cole: K.

Kai: No, I'm fucking not.

Jay: Do I have to be?

Lloyd: Please god, I am so tired.

*the team at mega monster amusement park, in the teacups*

Jay, Cole, and Zane: *spinning a little and talking*

Nya, Lloyd, and Kai: *flying past them, spinning as fast as they can, screaming*

Cole: If you got arrested what would be the charges?

Kai: Theft.

Nya: Disturbing the peace.

Jay: Aggravated assault.

Zane: Arson.

Lloyd: All of the above. In that order, probably.

Nya: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the things you lost throughout your life.

Zane: It would be nice to have my sense of purpose back...

Cole: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this.

Lloyd: My will to live! I haven't seen this in years.

Kai: I knew I lost that potential somewhere.

Jay: Mental stability, my old friend!

Nya: Jesus, could you guys lighten up a little?

Cole to Jay, who’s about to get married to Nya: Today, two families are becoming one.

Zane, in an ominous voice: Two families enter, one family leaves.

Kai: That sounds so threatening…

Nya: The Wedding Games…

Lloyd: May the bouquet toss be ever in your favor.

Jay: Beautiful.

Cole: Fuck all of you!

Lloyd: *dies*

Cole: Timer starts now! When are they coming back? I say two months!

Zane: Bullshit. One month.

Nya: Nah, half a month.

Jay, sobbing: WHAT ARE YOU DOING? LLOYD JUST DIED!

Kai, scratching chin in thought: One week.

Nya: I’m the smartest person in my friend group.

Kid Lloyd: You hang out with Kai, Cole, Zane, and Jay.

Kid Lloyd: It’s not as high a compliment as you think.

Zane: Throw lamps at people who need to lighten up, and throw handles at someone who needs to get a grip!

Jay: Throw a refrigerator at someone who needs to chill!

Cole: Throw scissors at someone who needs to cut it out!

Kai: Throw a clock at someone who needs to get with the times!

Nya: Throw matches at someone who needs to get fired up!

Lloyd: Throw a brick at someone to kill them.

*Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker*

Nya: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know.

Everyone:

Lloyd: ...I did. I broke it.

Nya: No. No you didn't. Kai?

Kai: Don't look at me. Look at Zane.

Zane: What?! I didn't break it.

Kai: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?

Zane: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.

Kai: Suspicious.

Zane: No, it's not!

Cole: If it matters, probably not, but Jay was the last one to use it.

Jay: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!

Cole: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

Jay: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Cole!

Lloyd: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Nya.

Nya: No! Who broke it!?

Everyone:

Cole: Nya... Kai's been awfully quiet.

Kai: rEALLY?!

*Everyone starts arguing*

Nya, talking to Sensei Wu and Sensei Garmadon: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it.

Nya: I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.

Nya:

Nya: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.

*the team in the bad timeline*

Cole: So what have you been up to recently?

Nya: Leading a revolution with Zane.

Cole: Good for you two! Me, I've joined the mob.

Nya: *nods* Oh, how cool! That's awesome!

Cole: I know! Anyway, have you heard from the others? Jay?

Nya: Happily living as a hermit in the woods. Lloyd?

Cole: Wrongfully locked up in an asylum, which reminds me, we need to break them out later. Kai?

Nya: Cult leader.

Cole: Yeah, that sounds about right.

Zane: Doctor = $140,000 a year, Furry artist on patreon = $160,000 a year.

Lloyd: I think you’re lowballing the furry art amount tbh.

Zane: Sorry for the inaccuracies Doctor Yiff.

Lloyd: No matter how I respond I don’t look well, well played. I walked into that.

Nya: Well, furry artists are typically more competent and courteous than your average doctor, so I can see that.

Zane: Did you legitimately just tell me that a person who draws wolf ass is more competent than a dude who spent 8+ years in an university to give you a lung transplant?

Jay: Doctors are bullshit and furry artists perform an infinitely more valuable service to society compared to them.

Zane: You will die in 7 days.

Kai: It took doctors 10 years to diagnose what was wrong with me, some insisting I was faking it for attention while a furry artist I knew said “Sounds like Crohn’s” after hearing me complain once and ended up being right.

Kai: Besides I can’t go to a doctor and ask them to draw Rouge the Bat wider than she is tall with tits to match, now can I?

Jay: You could if you weren’t a fucking coward.

Cole: This was like 50 consecutive punches to the face, what the fuck went on here.

Jay: If you put 'violently' in front of anything to describe your action, it becomes funnier.

Jay: Violently practices.

Zane: Violently studies.

Nya: Violently sleeps.

Kai: Violently shoots pictures.

Cole: Violently boxes.

Lloyd: Violently murders people.

Nya: Violently worries about the previous statement.