#I'm panicking slightly
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just a little nervous🥲😅
#I'm panicking slightly#it's fine#I'm fine#I've got a cello exam#and this is the obligatory panic that I have to go through beforehand#but I'll come out afterwards and it'll have gone well#...#hopefully
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i'm sorry.....those sketches were LEAKED??????
ohhhh my fucking G O D. that has to ABSOLUTELY be the most shittiest things you could do to an artist. i didn't know the gregpearl sketches were leaked until now. and since it happened AGAIN, i......i have no words
i......i don't wanna sound like i'm trying to stamp on anyone's fun but i feel like we're too excited for any ounce of su content, we're just ignoring the fact that these were posted without sugar's permission. i feel like as an artist, that's the most disrespectful things you could do to them since YOU thought it'd be right to post it without their knowledge. and it just annoys me a bit that people are just talking about the content of the drawings rather than the fact it was fucking leaked
i've always had a problem with leaks and this is just atrocious as an artist myself. and yeah, i'm probably overreacting. i do that a lot. i just......i don't know. i'm kinda freaking out as an artist rn
i'm a bit panicked and i don't know what i'm doing
#steven universe#idk why i made this#i'm just talking to no one#rebecca sugar#i'm slightly panicking#this is just bothering me a lot#i wrote this on impulse
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HANDS DIRTY | DELTA RAE
I've been thinking about this song + JGY for a long time ("I get my hands dirty, I show up so early, they show me no mercy, so I just keep working" hello???? hello??????), and I would like to personally thank ZZJ for his wonderful face and brilliant acting 🙏
#jin guangyao#making this video truly made me appreciate how much on-screen abuse and violence we see inflicted on JGY 😬#also godddd!!! the scene with Madam Jin yelling at JGY at phoenix mountain!!!#JGY doing this quick little panicked look around when she's done talking to see if anyone is going to do anything#and the pan we get of Zixun + Zixuan + Yanli + freakin Sect Leader Yao#and even XICHEN. all just standing there like :T awkward.#then it cuts back to JGY's devastated little face as he tries his best to carry on. probably fucking mortified that this is public#and both relieved yet slightly upset that no one tried to defend him over something that everyone knew was not his fault#UUGHHHHH#sorry I'm done now#the untamed
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I've been laughing and crying
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heart stopping moment thinking i had lost mum's dog when actually he's been sleeping under a shrub in the back garden for an indeterminate amount of time
#the garden is completely secure#and yet i panicked and woke up him from his nap because i failed to use my eyes#look i'm not used to being able to leave the back door open so a creechur can mosey in and out of the house at will#my cats are indoor creechurs only and i frequently panic if i leave the windows open slightly too much#also ross buddy could you please sleep somewhere more visible instead of lurking in a hedge for me
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guys I'm pancking my really long draft for the fic exchange was on my school account (IDK WHY) and my phone will NOT let me access it and my cats ate my computer cord so I can't turn on my computer and I ordered a new one a few days ago but it got delivered to the WRONG ADRESS and the new one comes THURSDAY so I have to start all over on my PHONE 😭
#Have I become a real fanifc author with my tragedies#I'm slightly panicking#HELP#newsies#Uksies#Javey#Jajdhshs
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Hello! Welcome!
This is technically a blog for the older people of tumblr (aka please no 17 and under people here as that's the kind of stuff likely going to be seen here is unsuitable for yous if your under 18.)
I made this fanblog to dedicate a place for everything relating to @heartfullofleeches on Tumblr!
Because I'm a paranoid little shy person and decided that this was the best way to cope and be able to share stuff from them without consequences that probably don't really exist but they do to my brain!
I may post a few things of my own but this is mostly to shower support and compliments their way!
Incase anyone wants to know more then here we go!
I'm an 18 year old adult who really enjoys and adores yanderes of all/many kinds and really into horror too. I don't mind the more romantic side of things when it comes to yanderes as technically they are (most the time) living too!
I also love the yandere x reader type things. Which is two reasons I really like and still love heartfullofleeches stuff and one reason I really felt like making the blog.
The other reason being paranoia with possible other things with it that makes me unable to feel uncomfortable sharing certain things with others without separate areas for them. Also this does help with my shyness too as it helps me to channel all the stuff into one.
Normally I don't make a pinned post/introductions especially not within such little time of creating a blog so this was a bothard to find out what to say.
I may post art here, however it would probably end up being heartfullofleeches OCs because that's something I've wanted to do but resources I got make it hard.
I may also post a few of my own yandere OCs here but I also might just post those under a different blog called @hiddeninsideaninsanemind which handles most my writing.
Oh and uhm if you want I can also send you to my main blog but it's more of a for everyone blog not just 18+ like this one. That main blog would be @blueshykitsune-blog and from there you can find a list of other blogs I have if you're interested in that...
I'm forcing myself a bit into making myself link those accounts but I said I would to myself so I did and I only did that because I never know... this is oddly enough not the first time I've had paranoia and such other issues with creators and stuff I liked which is why I have a pretty big list of blogs as of now. This is just another one added.
Oh and please don't just think I am making this blog only for myself! Because I really want to show support and add my own thoughts to posts made by heartfullofleeches. However whenever I like things it will only pop up my main blog, same for asks. So I may not give asks off anon but I might tag the blog so I still get the notification that says the asks sent and such. Or I may not.
My mind likes to disagree with itself at times so if you ever see like 50 different reblogs of the same thing with like 50 different inputs that might be why.
I hope I covered everything. Oh uh, when I get time I will change the pfp of the blog, but right now it's a photo of an eye of a weird toy thing that I had on my phone from like 2019 I think that was the year... maybe 2018?
#Fanblog of a blog#I'm slightly getting panicked as I make this so I may edit it later... so yeah. this technically is just a draft#Okay enjoy or don't. if you don't then please go away. I want this as a safe place for me and heartfullofleeches.#(my phone is able to know exactly what I mean by heart and then instantly pops up with heartfullofleeches now... I wrote it to much)#also I hope that's okay I call this blog your blog name plus fanblog#if not I'll change it!#I'll change whatever you need me to!#<-last two tags specifically directed towards heartfullofleeches btw#I fixed the name I hope!#Also I'm gonna maybe take a bit before going straight into posting/rebloggint things (heads up)
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so apparently when you go to a concert when you are actually kinda sick (sore throat, etc.) and scream-sing along to the songs...
you will not have any voice the next day. literally. i can barely whisper...
#😅😅😅#turtely#no voice#it was worth it#tho#i'm just slightly panicked that i won't ever be able to talk again#i am literally communicating through random signs#my phone and hoping they'll understand if i just move my lips#concert#concerts#pentatonix#ptx#pentatonix world tour#ptx world tour#acapella
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i'm def doing it wrong bc the whole point of acting is to bring your own feelings into what the characters experience so you know how to express them. but i'm kind of going at it backwards bc. the reason i'm good at acting is i am simply autistic lol i was almost doll-like as a kid and didn't show emotions or talked much so i had to learn how to do it like others did and then start faking it. and that's what acting is 👍
#like if i'm asked to play out the way i think i'd feel in response to a certain event#ppl are usually confused by my genuine reaction. bc i feel emotions wrong 😳#so i just think how others would react and that usually works#it's almost like a dj set in my head and i'm raising and lowering the volume of certain nuances over a beat aka basic emotion#anyway i have this on my mind often these days lol#bc we're writing an original show and the director really wants us to bring ourselves into our parts#and man. i do Not wanna do that 🖤 been panicking abt it for weeks really#we maybe managed to settle on smth today that i'm feeling slightly better about...? we'll see 😔#the reason i'm feeling better is bc it's p detached from myself. it's barely a character barely any emotion#so i can just. switch the beat around and change some nuance volumes as i go :P
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Anyway... I'll wait a day or two for the air to clear out before I post what I wanted to post 😅
#also I'm slightly worried now bc of everyone's reaction and I need reassurance that ppl aren't mad at me on here xbdbdbdbxb#cuz istg i was just posting that screenshot bc it's completely wild to me to see a Slovenian band up in the rankings with the likes of#tswift and bts and stray kids etc#but now I'm panicking#and not even about them going to the tags#but about the ppl in this place reacting negatively to this or not feeling safe to post 🙈
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Good night Tumblr xx
#no i didn't watch much of the game idk it's too stressful watching from home#BT yells about everything and#after the day i had.... like i just wanted to send the tax returns and invoices and the really guy kept pestering me for things and#like it's 5:05 and he's like all panicked like 'i sent an email and it's gone to spam LAURA CAN YOU SEND IT FROM YOUR EMAIL'#i mean#it doesn't Parramatta??????#and sophia was probably slightly peeved because she likes me to go home at 5 so she can smoke in the office before she goes home#i stood my ground though#said i still have things to finish up and told her that she can go home#which now i think about it hmmm i shouldn't be telling my boss to go home#i mean she's the boss it's her office#also i did a Colleen#i took things home you guys i took the ATO correspondence home#BUT i forgot the address listing#dammit#oh well#i can still sort the payg instalments#get them ready#open the letters#i didn't even open any mail over the last two days#it's too much#we needed $32k this week (Sophia's target) and we only did $20k#we failed#I'm sorry sophia
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When close to Enoch, one may notice their heartbeat quickening ever so slightly. Goosebumps raise along their arms, and they find themselves holding their breath. It feels, perhaps, similar to excitement. Anticipation.
If they meet his eyes, those feelings quickly ebb into something warmer. Something that feels almost familiar. Comforting, even...but in a way that they can't quite put their finger on.
His smile is inviting, and he gives some small greeting or another. Maybe it's his inflection, or the clear, quiet confidence in his voice that makes it hard not to hang on every word he says. Before they know it, it's as though most other noise around them has faded into the background.
It's easy to watch him. To be around him. Each movement easy and precise; a purpose to each and every one. He leaves himself little room to make a mistake, but it doesn't appear as though he's trying to force perfection, either. (even if he is) A comfortable in between that has that feeling of familiarity growing. As if those gestures and mannerisms are something they know. That they've heard and seen a hundred times before.
They come away feeling as though they know a few meaningful things of him. Like the end of a well-loved novel, it leaves both a feeling of satisfaction, and a craving to know more.
Many animals and beasts are said to be good judges of character, though. And though a vast majority seem drawn to Enoch in much the same way as other beings are, it's the opposite for others.
For these beasts, there's something more to it. Those first feelings they become aware of aren't excitement. The anticipation is different. It feels like eyes are on them. Something is watching. Something is waiting, like a predator who, despite having already had their fill, is debating on one more meal.
They catch his eyes, and it's too late. The predator already has them in its maw. It's suffocating, and they only have one move left to make before teeth close over them, and they're swallowed up.
...Only to be let go again just as their fate seems imminent. Maybe it wasn't hungry after all.
Or maybe that was a warning. Pry into something too intently, and it's likely to snap shut on you when you least expect it.
Like a mouse in a trap.
#[Enoch -headcanons-]#This is actually meant to go along with an ask that I'm answering right now#But I ended up feeling like it would be better on its own?#Yeah though essentially being around Eno causes similar feelings for just about everyone#But the...I suppose aura that he gives off usually is actually a very toned down version of the one that he has naturally#which is what some rare few can sort of pick up on#And at that point everything feels Not Great#If he wants to mess with someone#he'll just...stop toning his aura down and watch them start to get paranoid and panicking#because this sort of...'something is watching' feeling just gets worse and worse until it piles into this feeling of imminent doom#most of the time though yeah it's toned down into something that feels much nicer#if not slightly addictive in a way for some people
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I love captioning, you guys! what do you mean you don't? (oh god I'm dying guh my BACK my eyes I can't feel my legsss my fingers are so stiff ohhh I'm going to faint I need to eat WHY is my water all the way on the other side of my room where did the sun go oughhh my back)
#I just wanted to watch doctor who with cc sobs#thank god I can just edit preexisting ones#mind you. lots of editing. this may seem like I'm doing nothing. I am not#I would do my own but I just don't have the time#I certainly have the fuckin patience though lord help me HOW are there possibly this many things to tweak and fix#sometimes the timing will be slightly off and it scares the shit out of me lol#I start genuinely panicking thinkin I'll have to fix EVERY SINGLE LINE but luckily it's usually only a few bits here and there#y'all I really do like adding captions to things but every time I forget how much it will just murder you fvmkfkmf#—:*after these messages we'll be righttttt back*:—
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Il riassunto di tutto sto casino dallo scorso anno 😅
If i talk about that person to my therapist again i think she's gonna slap me like in a low budget telenovela 🤣🤣
But yeah this javadoodles reel i found on ig was perfect to describe how i'm feeling right now lol, it has been a long process but now i'm waaaaay less angry and sad than before ✌️
#personal#lmao what a rollercoaster#dottoressa è il trauma giuro non lo faccio apposta 🤣#but yes that reel was totally a vibe#now i'm just slightly bothered by the whole deal#thanks also to all my besties who listened to me and supported me through all my panick attacks and breakdowns#love u 💜💜💜
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okay.
i can't hide everything.
mom's not gonna be happy about it. she's definitely gonna scold me.
scared. but.
it's fine.
it's the internet!! there are things that can't be blocked or hide. it's fine.
it's going to be fine. just try not to panic. just don't panic.
you're old enough to handle things. stop crying.
#💧damp paper'd.#things aren't going well for my grades and she's planning to take it away.#listen. i think it was about time anyways. don't blame my parents. i got too addicted.#still. i'm worried about my friends. chair. third. all my followers. my mutuals.#i'm scared that i'm gonna lose them at some point. i.#i'm sorry. i'm so sorry. i just had to get this out somewhere.#i'm scared. i don't wanna lose everyone again. it was hard enough to try and stop clinging to them.#again PLEASE don't assume my parents are bad. they're great and i love them with all my heart. it was bound to happen. trust me.#i'm... okay. i have a great family. i'm fine. just.... slightly panicking.#sorry. sorry. i'm so sorry.#i just don't wanna lose everyone again.#don't reply#maybe i need some reassurance. idk. i'm just scared.
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my most stressful essay: done
#i still have so much to do but they're SO much less intense than the one i just finished#and i have longer to do them so i'm not quite as panicked#we're getting THROUGH it gang !!#winter speaks#on a slightly unrelated note caramel frappes are my new favorite thing of all time
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