#I'm not tired at fucking all so this does suck tho

[izzy-b-hands]

Gave up on sr2 for the night because the AI is horribly befuckened rn and I had enemy gang members dropping out of the sky in their fucking cars, while the road refused to load and the camera slowed so I could no longer shoot and drive (the reticle moves so slowly that by the time it registers your character took a shot, the gun doesn’t actually fire at your target. If it sounds frustrating, just imagine playing it, it very much is !!!!!!)

Functioning Bideo Game asdfjaklsjfk

[kittlyns]

I had yet another long, strenuous day yesterday and didn't finish work until super late and then I couldn't fall asleep until well past 2am cuz I was in so much pain from standing literally all day

[holdoncallfailed]

1996 dash simulator

🍊 allpulpnojuice follow

guys i'm serious can we PLEASE leave the battle of britpop in 1995 where it belongs i am So Tired

3 notes

👽 skygazer81 follow

has anyone heard of this group heaven's gate? they seem kinda sus but their website is sick as hell

🔬 number1skeptic follow

dude...

56 notes

👑 princessdianastyle follow

i can't believe di and charles officially got divorced romance is DEAD

🇺🇸 itstheeconomystupid follow

ok royalist bootlicker

👑 princessdianastyle follow

oh so now the clinton/gore rpf shipper is going to preach to us?

895 notes

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 lesbianbartsimpson follow

i just saw the birdcage in theatres...tbh i don't love the queerbaiting. why would you cast two straight actors to play a gay couple...

7 notes

🫎 tabarnakonwood follow

society if québec had won its independence last year

1,178 notes

🪩 rhythmnation1814 follow

i swear if staff doesn't stop fucking around i'm going to permanently move to geocities.

#i'm just glad my PC can run netscape 2.0 #but the dial-up is so slow it's like barely worth it ugh maybe i'll just stop using the internet in general #it's not like i NEED it yk

6 notes

😎 Anonymous asked: Do you agree that if the glove does not fit, then we must acquit?

🚬 mall-rats answered: Bro I'm not getting baited into talking about the OJ trial again. Go troll someone else

32 notes

🧠 craneonme follow

can you GAYS stop posting frasier spoilers

☕️ cafenervosa follow

niles fucking DIES

34,021 notes

🍳 waterydomestic follow

does anyone else feel like the pavement fandom kind of sucks now?? i don't want to be an asshole but when cut your hair started playing on mtv all the time i knew it was over.

📻 philselwaysbaldhead follow

lol now you know how radiohead fans felt when fake plastic trees was on the clueless soundtrack

16 notes

🍔 kelandkenan follow

i've always loved the way they loved...

#kel climbing thru kenan's window because he just HAS to see him even tho he's banned from the rockmore house #like i'm sorry but it's true love your honor

874 notes

🧸 thebeaniebabyenjoyer follow

whenever i see that someone's fursona is a gerbil i'm always like oh so you must be a pretty big richard gere fan

🕺🏻 scentofalpacino follow

hold on let me ask jeeves something

🕺🏻 scentofalpacino follow

yeah this is funny as hell

51,901 notes

[antiherotheantisocial]

hm...villain era 👹🖤🧌🪨🪰🦠

'i love deep convos' shut the hell up what the hell is a deep convo what y'all even talking about the unexplored shit in the ocean?.....what's down there 🫣...my soulmate?...heaven???....hint hint wink wink nudge kick 🫣 wait...it couldn't be.....i thought...since y'all're always talking about it i thought.......no....it actually exists???........they found.....PUS-😳😳😳???

the thing i like most about myself is that i'm honest with myself. i'm never too harsh, never too relaxed, never too overtly understanding nor allowing, but always tolerant enough knowing that i need room to grow.

i really don't think love will happen to me which is why i'm so against that entire toxic positivity notion....i think love devoid of intentionality towards the specific person may perhaps be a...type of love....but it's not what i want and it is never good enough for me. it never has felt like it's ever enough which makes me loathe it all the more and if anything it's always left me pathetically desperate for more..

i think it usually makes my paranoia worse actually. i don't like when people pity me and that's what so much of how showing love is discussed.....like you pity them. like they can't do it on their own. i don't like when people attempt to do it subtly either. i actually think that's worse and it makes me even angrier faster. who caaaaaaaaares leave me aaaaaalone....

i complain a bunch about yearning but i don't really mind it i don't think. i feel safer yearning than letting people hurt me because i can never be good enough for them even though they never want to be honest about that. i'm honest about it so why can't other people be honest about it too? it just sucks knowing a person more than what they know of themself...i think a lot of people never really, honestly and truly....sit with their feelings and question why they want to challenge certain things about me. it feels like the pity thing again, wanting to fix me but i've tried and tried and tried once more endlessly... and i'm not traumatized in any way and there was never a clear cause for why i turned out this way which means you need to accept that i can never be your little pet project....i think when i warn people off it probably...looks like a self-fulfilling prophecy but i think it's just being honest about my past and how i've been treated before. like i know people like you and they don't enjoy me so i probably wouldn't be recommended for you to spend time on. how is that in any way rude of me? and anyways, i don't like giving people who never intentionally cared about me that control to fuck with my already fragile ego.

i think it's fine. i'd rather be lonely than look like a fool lmaoo...i think it hurts because i make it so easy to love me but no one of whom i've wanted really ever......tried.. so maybe i just like coming here dumping my depressing ass feelings knowing that no one really cares and if they do there's nothing they can do to fix it.....so what? so you don't like my blog because i'm secretly guilt tripping everyone that attempts to speak to me on here??? 🥺 why is no one ever on my side 🥹🙃😢

an aside, but i hate the word fickle. decide that you want to love me. don't do it solely because you feel like it. if you actually knew what love was you'd be willing and wanting to do it when you don't feel like it too absolute fucking piece of shit. i want love for me not just simply because i'm a human. anyhow i wish i could type fuck like one of those death metal fonts you know that's how this entire aside makes me feel. grrrrrrrr RAWR. hehehe that too omgggg 🥰💞💕💕💕

ok bye. 😐

[glitch-karma]

hai i want to req a scenario where bsd characters has a crush on the reader and tries dropping hints but the reader just thinks that they’re being nice :D

characters: yosano, nikolai, akutagawa, ranpo, jouno

I added Chuuya cause I am self-indulgent, but enjoy!

Tw: Very light talk of characters being very touchy, but still sfw

Yosano

she's so obvious

Constantly complimenting you

Saying how pretty/handsome you are

Maybe a little touchy iykyk

She honestly wants to confess and have a serious relationship with you

and she's been trying to drop hints but..

"Oh Y/n~, you're so cute I could eat you up.."

"Huh? You can't eat people Yosano! Do you need something to snack on?"

"ugh. No, thank you, dear..."

Finally, she'll confess to you after patching you up after a small mission.

"Y/n.. I uhm, really like you."

"Awe, I like you too Yosano! You're my best friend"

She falls on the floor momentarily before just jumping up, grabbing you by the collar, and kissing you.

"O-Oh!" "Yeah. Oh."

"So? Do you.. Like me too?"

"W-Well. If it means we could do that agai- MPHM!"

Nikolai

Another obvious one

Now he's the real feeler upper

He will not let you GO MAN

Definitely a grabber too

I have this vision of him full-on grabbing your ass and you're just like "Oh? What's up, Nikolai?"

Surprise hugs from behind

He lets you braid his hair

Unlike Yosano, he will not be as patient

He'll grab your hands, get down on one knee, and scream:

"Y/n~! I love you! Please go out with me so we can be free together!"

You are not expecting this at all

So you shakily nod

Then he'll pick you up bridal style and run around with you in his arms <3

Akutagawa

Now with him

I wouldn't fucking notice either bro

His idea of hints is odd

"You don't suck at fighting.."

"Uhm... Thank you?"

He's read that some people give food to their crushes, so he'll randomly just set a cup of tea down on your desk

Since it's a food he likes, he'll also just leave figs on your desk???

It's, very confusing to say the least

In this case, I don't see him ever actually confessing

it was actually Chuuya that found out and pushed him along

Aka, he dragged you both into the same room and pushed Akutagawa along

but it all worked out in the end

Ranpo

Oh my God you gotta be real dence

CLIMBS ON YOU?

LIKE FULL ON SCALES YOUR BODY AND SITS ON YOUR SHOULDERS

And when you get tired and ask him to get off he's just like "Nah I'm good."

Shares his snacks with you

You brought him sweet mochi one day and that was the day he vowed to marry you

You thought he was joking?

Likes pitching your cheeks

"You're so squishy and cute Y/n~ Just like a dumpling" "Ranpo that hurts-"

The way he confesses I hear you ask?

One morning he just, out of nowhere kisses your cheek.

You FLIPPED out and he was just confused

"oh, are we not dating?" "WHAT? NO?!"

He didn't realize you were too busy to notice his feelings

Jouno

Side note: God we need more Jouno hc's fr tho

Jouno's way of showing he loves you?

Training you to the mfing bone.

Bro does not let up

If you're a hunting dog it's even worse

Y'know that scene where he stands on tecchou's back?

He does that all the time

Sometimes hits your head too

But, if he sees you're genuinely struggling he eases up

Honestly, he shows hints in very small ways that you wouldn't notice

Like a small pat on the back or bringing you water after a long day

All the other hunting dogs can see the way he listens extra intently when you talk as well

Another thing, he remembers almost every conversation you two have even had.

So he knows all your interests, likes, and hobbies

He would probably just casually do a normal confession, bring you a rose and a gift <3

Chuuya

Chuuya is terrified of letting people get too close to him (Kinnie moment-)

So for a while he wouldn't make any attempts at a relationship with you at all

But after you've stuck around him for years, even when others didn't, how could he not be smitten for you?

After a while of denying, he'll finally drop hints

He'll offer to drive you too and from work (mostly for the excuse to have your arms around him)

He also started bringing you lunches on Monday's

Has bought you jewelery and chokers galore

The expensive ones too cause he rich rich

He will drunkenly confess

"Damn.. Why do you have to go and make me fall in love with you?"

"..What?"

He has never sobered up so fast

He tried to stand up and leave, but you grabbed him and hugged him tight

After a few seconds, he did the same

[vivwritesfics]

VIV HI 👹✨️

Request 😍❤️

Think like an hidden boyfriend.

Idk how else to explain it

Reader is like a reporter maybe? Or WAG

And it is well know that she is dating one of the drivers. Here is the twist....

No one knows who the boyfriend is 👹🙏

So just imagine one day, one of the other girlfriends post a couple of pictures

The fans are interested in two of them.

One is where the reader is being held by on oc them driver. The person is clearly visible ( not the boyfriend they just like teasing lol)

Now the second is just the reader laying down on the deck with an arm wrapped rather protective over her ( like think hand on ass 👹👹) like nope this is mine,fuck off lol🙏👹

Now everyone is freaking out trying to figure who the boyfriend is and everyone has different reason for who it is

The end would be the reveal after they were found out in a picture (with consent) of these two making out (think damn near fucking)

You can choose who you want to be the boyfriend

Thinking either carlos, max or Oscar for the boyfriend and for the like the first picture lando/logan maybe??

I started this after complaining about how tired i was but Bianca I couldn't resist 😫

naw but i'm so proud of this one

y/nl/n

liked by jensonbutton, maxverstappen1 and 455,819 others

y/nl/n i love my job 🫶🫶

view all 2,753 others

username1 living the dream 😫😫

alex_albon can't believe you didn't interview me

y/nl/n was too busy sucking face with your girlfriend 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

lilymhe mwah 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

username2 who is she?

username3 username2 how do you not know Y/N?

username4 she's a reporter for Sky Sports F1 and Lando's best friend

username5 the dating rumours tho 👀👀

y/nl/n

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 477,819 others

y/nl/n ma homie

view all 2,917 comments

username6 HOW DID YOU GET YOUR JOB I WANNA BE YOU SO BAD

georgerussell63 you're in the wrong garage

y/nl/n you're in the wrong team (kidding toto ily)

landonorris 💖💖

username7 LANDO?

username7 EXCUSE ME?

username8 he's really fuelling those rumours 😂

y/nl/n landonorris you know what you're doing 😠

y/nl/n

liked by carlossainz55, mclaren, and 499,143

y/nl/n team papaya 4eva 🧡

view all 3,074 comments

mclaren absolute queen

y/nl/n admin ily

lilymhe i am in AWE of you 😩

y/nl/n says you 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

landonorris my favourite girl 💕

y/nl/n your only girl? 🤧🤧

username9 they're dating

username10 i can't TAKE it anymore just tell us PLEASE 😭

y/nl/n

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, and 532,664 others

y/nl/n love ya lan

view all 3,752 comments

username11 naw this is a hard launch

username12 they've been friends for years so...

username13 this was not on my 2023 bingo card

username14 ILY GUYS this is so cute 💖💖💖💘💘💘💘💓💓💗💗💗💗💗💓💓💕💕💕💖💘💘💘💕❤❤♥♥♥♥❣❣💖💖❤❤❤❤❤

username15 literally no other drivers are commenting 👀👀

username16 yeah this is sus

username17 i don't trust either of you 😭

y/nl/n

liked by landonorris, maxverstappen1, and 566,983 others

y/nl/n switching sides

view all 4,996 comments

landonorris 😔😔

mclaren we miss you y/n! 😭😭

y/nl/n i miss you too admin 😭

username18 WHAT

username18 DOES

username18 THIS

username18 MEAN

scuderiaferrari welcome y/n! ❤

y/nl/n officially a tifosi now

y/nl/n

liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris, and 605,224 others

y/nl/n mwah

view all 5,832 others

landonorris we lost her 😔

y/nl/n shut up you muppet

username19 THE SOFT LAUNCH?

username20 i mean we all knew she was dating a driver but WHO IS IT?

y/nl/n

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, and 679,475 others

y/nl/n 😈😈😈😈

view all 9,884 comments

carlossainz55 😈😈😈😈

username21 THE GLOVES

username22 THE GLOVES

username23 THE GLOVES

charles_leclerc you guys are disgusting

y/nl/n *disgustingly cute

landonorris so i don't have to keep it secret now?

y/nl/n you are released from your duties

y/nl/n

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, and 675,329 others

y/nl/n love a man in red ❣

view all 5,884 comments

carlossainz55 passenger princess

username24 why does it shock me that carlos knows that phrase?

y/nl/n idk he's the real passenger princess here 👸👸

username25 girlies we lost him 😔

username26 girlies we lost HER 😔

landonorris he is babygirl 🥰🥰🥰

y/nl/n 🤺🤺

carlossainz55

liked by pierregasly, y/nl/n, and 696,335 others

carlossainz55 mía 💖

mine 💖

view all 6,835 comments

y/nl/n te amo ❤

carlossainz55 Te quiero más ❤

landonorris 📷📷??

y/nl/n back off bitch

lilymhe you stole my girlfriend 😠

y/nl/n he's just my side piece babygirl, dw 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

[rosinantecigarettes]

★ ★ WHAT IS LOVE? ★ ★

what's real love for them. (ft. smoker, kid and killer) part 2/?

content warning: plus sized!reader. reader have nipple piercings (in kid's part). smoker's a bbg. swearing. not proofread. partially nsfw. cockwarming in mouth. semi public sex. nipple play. slight degradation (use of whore). missionary. sex in the kitchen. hair pulling.

a.n: here's part two! since ya'll liked the first part (a LOT) I think I'll do more, you can suggest a character you want tho ;)

𝐒𝐌𝐎𝐊𝐄𝐑 (my bbg)

when you welcome him home with a smile on your face; his entire body tired, just needing to snuggle with you.

when you let him just rest his head on your fluffy lap, the back of his head poking your tummy; if you caress his hair, he might absolutely sleep.

when you leave little notes in the lunch boxes that you make for him with so much love; "I love you! ;)" "have a good day <3" "come home well! ^^". he will never admit, but he keeps all the notes you write.

when you offer to massage his tense shoulders and does it so so well, leaving a bunch of kisses on the back of his neck; all he can do is lean his head back and lay it on your shoulder as you leave a kiss on his forehead, a smile growing on his lips.

when you're kneeling under his desk in the office, his girthy cock inside your mouth. with one hand he's holding your hair so you won't move as he try to hold back any sound. "f-fuck... keep it wet and warm, 'kay?"

𝐄𝐔𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐒 𝐊𝐈𝐃

when you compliment his works, it feeds his pride and he is happy that you like something he made, might do something for you if you're lucky; "oi, y/n. I did this bracelet for you, take it and shut up!" so romantic, isn't he?

when he catches you staring at his bare chest, the first time he catch you doing it he teased you for a whole month. won't admit but likes it.

when he sees you and killer working together, on a fight or on daily activities, his best friend and his lover getting along? fuck yes.

when he sees you fight. the fire and adrenaline in your eyes as you take down more then one enemy with no effort and with a smile on your face; makes him so proud.

when he use his devil fruit power to send shocks through your nipple piercings as he suck on them, your moans growing louder everytime he does that. "shouldn't have done these... I'm gonna suck on them until you cum, whore"

𝐊𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐑

when you brush his hair. in the start of your relationship he was hesitant about it, but it only took you patience and here you are, brushing his hair every night.

when you sit in the kitchen and talk about anything that comes to your head. he likes to cook by himself, but he appreciates when you just sit there and make company for him.

when you blow him a kiss before a fight. he finds it so silly but really adorable; you dont need to see his face to know he's smiling and with a faint blush on his cheeks.

when you ask him to explore an island with him. he's not big on pda but he'll walk closely to you and carry bags for you. (ugh i love him)

when youre sat at the table of the kitchen, one hand pulling killer's hair and the other around his neck as he thrust slow and deep into your wet cunt, both his hands around your waist and his forehead on your shoulder while he kiss your neck. "princess... if you keep pulling my hair like that, I dont think I'll be able to hold myself from fucking you senseless on the table"

[aezuria]

hiii i love ur writing sm!! i was wondering if u would do leo valdez x reader headcanons? ty!!!

*ੈ✎ keep your head still, i'll be your thrill

—all the small things, blink-182

content: leo valdez x reader

warnings: cursing again

librarian's annotations: the title has no connection to the hcs but it came up while i was writing this also IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK FOREVER 🙏🙏🙏

super clingy i do not make the rules

oh you thought you were gonna get up and be productive?? not today!

fuck everyone else tbh

LOVEEES gossip sessions with u

hes so invested in all the drama u have

probably laying on his stomach and swinging his feet and gasping incredulously. "what!? no she did not..."

got very pouty that you did not invite him to the girls night bc he didnt want to "miss out on the tea" (lwk stealing from my own work oops)

who can blame him tbh

LOVE LOVES DANCING

loves teaching u too (even if u suck)

like imagine him holding your waist and moving you to the beat as you fumble along, his chest pressed up against your own

GOOD LORD

"forward, back, left- there you go," he murmured into your ear, looking down at your feet. you stepped on his shoes a lot more than you should've; did he ever think that his proximity was why you were messing up!?

"you suck at this, don't you?" he laughed, but twirled you around anyway.

"did you ever think you're just a shit teacher?"

"rude!"

also this man was born a star

can probably hit super high notes as if its nothing

ok so we all know how hes a genius right

oh my GOD imagine him explaining how his stuff works and using words you're sure don't even exist and he's so into it and he just sounds so SMART

intelligence is so attractive why does no one talk abt that

you wanted to watch him work on the engine, so you pulled up a stool next to him. you stared at his side, his tank top dirty with grease and sticky with sweat. how long had he been working since you got here?

you'd get mad at him for not taking a break later. right now? you were admiring the view. who wouldn't?

"hey leo?"

he hummed in response, still hyper-focused on the engine.

"how does all that work, exactly?" you were never one for machines—good thing you have a mechanic boyfriend!

he looks to you, a happy glimmer in his eyes. "you really wanna know? so basically— this part connects to that part and then..."

you don't know how long you've been zoned out, too busy staring at his perfect

"y/n?" he finally realizes you haven't been paying attention. "you with me, now?" he raises an eyebrow with a grin on his face.

"huh? what?" you straightened up, fumbling over your words. "yeah! why wouldn't i be?" you tried to act as if you weren't just ogling him seconds before.

"oh y'know.. cause you were checking me out." he winked, leaning back against the engine as he put himself on display. "i mean, you obviously couldn't help it. i mean, look at me!"

someone humble him

its not like he doesn't do the same tho

if he accidentally walks in on you he'd be like "oh my gods-! sorry!" and cover his eyes with his hands, but his fingers are parted so he could still look through. literally the 🫣 emoji

"GET OUT!"

"OKAY I'M GOING DON'T HIT ME- OW!"

he is SUPER ticklish and you WILL use this to your advantage

esp his ears

one time you touched them out of curiosity cause theyre pointer than average and he was like "eek!"

pause

"aww i didn't know you could make that sound!" you poked some more fun at him because that was adorable

"shut up!"

another time he's laying on you, ruining your plans of getting up early and being active. you tried rolling out from underneath him but his arms snake around you like a vice, squeezing a groan out of you.

"leo get off!" you tried shoving him off, but that didn't work either. he simply buried his face into your neck, mumbling a tired no.

you really had shit to do, so you resorted to the last possible tactic. "i didn't wanna have to do this..." you warned. (you so wanted to do this)

you slipped your hands under his shirt and started tickling his stomach, effectively getting him writhing off you with laughter.

"stop-! that tickles!" he tried doing the same back, but he was squirming far too much.

ok real talk now

love loves staying up late with you until its past midnight and you guys are just rambling about random topics. he's just so relaxed with you, his heart feels so full and there's no space anymore, so his bottled up emotions spill out

which is usually a closely-guarded secret because he's just the funny guy of the group, right?

what does he know about feelings? isn't it his job to just keep everyone else happy? joking about everything will take away the pain, won't it?

(it doesn't)

"i don't know, i just- feel like i don't really fit in with everyone. they all have these cool powers, and i'm just.. me." he laughed dryly, face devoid of his usual happiness as he stared at the ceiling. "sometimes, i feel like you could do so much better. but at the same time?" his voice lowered as he rolled onto his side, staring into your eyes. "i want to keep you to myself. i really, really don't want to lose you."

you were glad he finally opened up to you, but your heart ached at the way he thought of himself. how could he not see how highly everyone thought of him, especially you?

"just you? leo, you're the coolest person i know. you're so, so smart, you can fix just about anything, you're funny, you're kind, you can cook; what's not to love?" you smiled softly. you could go on and on about this man. for him to think that he was the lucky one? it was quite the opposite.

"and you don't have to worry," you whispered, cuddling closer to him and pressing a soft kiss to his cheek. "i'll always be with you."

[dollveis]

⠀ ⠀ MOTH TO A FLAME !

ELLIE WILLIAMS ⠀⸝⸝ but does he know the reasons that you cry? or tell me does he know where your heart lies? where it truly lies. ⸝⸝

˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ warnings. +18 content, best friend!ellie x fem!reader, mention of sex with a man, reader is dating a man for the first few paragraphs but they break up soon in the fic, kind of emotional cheating tho, dealer!ellie + mention of usage of weed, reader checking out ellie all the time, it's hinted ellie masturbated thinking about reader and reader did too, ellie's actually kind of a loser lesbian but with a tough facade, idk if there's something more. 4.5k WORDS.

˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ vi's sticky note. so... i was watching tiktok and this appeared, some tiktok fake scenarios also helped me. this took me forever and i pretty much hate how rushed is.

⠀⠀⠀

IT DIDN'T FELT RIGHT, it didn't felt right how his hands roamed through the valley of your hips or how his lips sucked the skin in your neck, leaving soft reddish marks. It didn't felt right how his knee started to make space between your bare legs. It didn't felt right because he wasn't her and just that thought made your heart soak in guilt because he was actually everything you wished once.

Andrew was the type of guy Disney movies showed, with pearly white teeth hiding behind a cute smile, eyes that looked at you with burning adoration and desire, gentle with you and your wishes, the type of guy you would want to bring to your parents house and your friends adore but he was not the type of guy you wanted anymore. Because you didn't want Disney's pretty prince, maybe you wanted your hot lesbian best friend.

Fuck.

"Andrew... can we stop?" your voice coming out almost silent, "i'm not feeling well today," your lips forming a twisted smile as you pushed his shoulders and weight away from your body slightly.

"Oh, sorry, baby," his eyes opening in surprise as he got away, sitting next to your body only covered by your underwear, "i was doing something you didn't like?"

"Oh, no," liar, "it's not that," you were being such a liar. I mean, he was not that horrible at sex and the first times you didn't mind it until Ellie got a stupid girlfriend and your mind kept thinking about how she fucked her when your boyfriend was on top of you, trying to find his way to your inside. Your mind kept thinking about how well she could fuck you with a fake dick, probably better than your own boyfriend.

And you were tired of your own mind because well, you just knew Ellie saw you as her best friend and you should do the same, you had a boyfriend, why your heart wanted to run next to the freckled girl? why deep in your mind you felt you only started date Andrew as an attempt to stop looking at Ellie's lips when she spoke, to stop staring at her freckles longer than a normal friend would do. To stop your heart from racing as fast as a bird's one when she sang love songs looking directly at your eyes, feeling hers drowning in your soul and her essence crawling into your heart, invading it like a plague.

Your boyfriend hummed, stare lost at the back of the room, "it's just that... i feel something's wrong," he turned his head to look directly at you, "like you're not feeling us anymore," his words echoed in your brain, taking you by surprise, you knew Andrew avoided serious themes just like a kid. He had the bad habit of acting deaf towards problems, hiding them under the bed hoping they're gonna resolve by themselves.

You're not feeling us anymore, did you felt you both at some point? or were you just lying to yourself from the start?

"I've been tryin' to ignore it but i can't keep playing dumb," his voice started to escalate, sounding more desperate with every word he was saying, "where your heart truly lies? is it with me?"

"Andrew," you sighed, "what are you trying to-"

"Or with her?" his words kicked directly to your heart, your voice suddenly stuck at your throat, completely tangled around it making you unable to answer and incapable of lying to him and to you once again.

If like your lack of words and silence gave him the answer he nodded, getting up and sighing. Fixed his hair with his right hand as he roamed through his room, first looking for his clothes and dressing up with some basketball shorts and a white tee. For you, you just were frozen there, sitting with your legs crossed at the end of the king sized bed, your mind running as your prefrontal cortex screamed to you for unconsciously follow the insular and your feelings, telling you how dumb you are but... you couldn't help it.

"I like you but i'm not keep acting like i'm blind," he stood up in front of you, towering you, "i think is for the best to take a break until you find out how you really feel," he handed you your clothes and your hand grabbed them as you finally had the courage to face him, "i'm gonna let you change," he avoided your stare, walking towards the door and leaving you alone with yourself and your guilt.

You wish you felt bad, you wanted to feel something at least something minimum. Whatever it was, whether it was rage, sadness, loneliness, something, but you didn't, absolutely nothing. Well, there was something: relief, and that feeling just incremented the guilt in your heart, your almost perfect boyfriend basically broke up with you?

The boyfriend everyone adored but you.

You reached for your jeans, pulling out your phone from one of the back pockets, unlocking it, 1:00 𝐀𝐌. Not late enough yet.

⠀⠀⠀

⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀els 💌

can u pick me up?

please ellie, hurry up

⠀⠀⠀

???

thought u were spending the night w ur lil bf

⠀⠀⠀

just come pls

⠀⠀⠀

is everything okay? im at a party at jesses place so gimme 15 mins

⠀⠀⠀

You chuckled at how ironic it was that the first person you talked to after Andrew's words was the apple of discord between you two, but you didn't do it with intention, she was your best friend, the closest friend you had. Your safe place.

Without wasting time you dressed up and made sure you had everything in your bag, wanting to avoid having to go back to his place at least for tonight.

The buzz in the back of your black jeans making you instinctively pulling it out, hoping it was the auburn haired girl who texted you, when you turned on your phone the first notification that popped out was a 'im at the corner' from Ellie, as an answer you just left her in read, hurrying up to grab your bag and throwing it at your back, heading towards the door of the room. Your body stopped for a second at the frame of the wooden door, analyzing what you would say once you step out of your now ex boyfriend's room.

Just say goodbye and go you breathed, collecting yourself before opening the door, encountering the small living room and kitchen and Andrew sitting at the end of the white sofa, his eyes directly facing you once he realizes your presence.

"I'm leaving," your voice obviously awkward just like your words and your thumb pointing the front door at your left.

"Oh, someone's picking you?" you just nodded, preferring avoid more confrontation by bringing up Ellie was the one waiting for you outside his block.

And after some more awkward exchange of words and stares you left his apartment finally, making you sigh, liberating the air you were containing in your lungs.

'take ur time, dw, i almost got stopped by the police bc i thought something serious happened🙄 just that' Ellie texted again, chuckling at her message you opened the glass door of the pretty expensive block of apartments, looking for your best friend's black car. Her distinctive shitty -which she always denied- car finally entering on your sight.

You make your way to it, opening first the door of the backseat to throw your bag and at the end entering the passenger seat, being welcomed and hugged by the soft smell of weed mixed with Ellie's cologne, a familiar smell that made you feel blanketed and safe.

"Hi," you softly mumbled, kinda escaping her obvious stare.

"Hi?" Ellie repeated you, feeling in her voice how one of her eyebrow was lifted "just hi?"

"What you mean?" as you rested your head in the window of the car you could felt Ellie's body leaning closer to yours, driving your heart to the palm of your hand.

"You tell me," her minty breath skimming your ear and cheek, " since 'm not the one who called at fucking 1 am," her hand reaching your chin, fingertips caressing the edges of your jaw. Abruptly her fingers clenched around it, shivers traveling through your whole spine as your heart started to pound loudly. So loud you were scared Ellie could hear it and if she did, she didn't give a shit about it. The delicious strength she had on your jaw incremented, not to the point it hurted but to force you to look back at her, herr emerald gaze contemplating your face, scrutinizing your features just like she was searching a hint of what happened.

Ellie's scent was making hard to keep your mind focused on her eyes and not in the strands of hair lost in the front of her face or how her mouth was softly opened, the oxygen entering to her body through it instead of her nose. And, oh God, her nose, sparkled with some freckles that travelled from her right cheek to the left one, making it seems like a small constellation was drawn all over her face, one that expanded softly to her shoulders and chest covered with a white wife beater and a sage green flannel with the sleeves rolled up, her sleeve tattoo in sight to curious eyes like yours.

"You really drive me crazy," Ellie purred with a smirk on her lips, her warm breath hitting your face. Actions like that, like whispering next to your lips or examining your face and figure with a grin, made your stomach tangle in knots and your head dizzy, "you always expect me to run under your skirt when you call my name," her voice getting lower as her grip on your chin started to soft.

Fingers leaving it to roam to your neck, stopping their way in a reddish mark Andrew left there, Ellie's eyebrows furrowing slightly at the thought of his mouth touching you, "and i always do, so you have a point," her body getting away from yours and leaving you almost cold by the absent of her touch, she readjusted herself in the pilot sit and she just lied there, resting her head in her palm, looking at you with her corners of her mouth upturned like she was waiting for you to say something back, like she didn't leave you breathless and intoxicated in her.

"So..." you turned to the front, evading her stare again.

"So are you goin' to tell me what happened or what, because i know you didn't call me because little mister perfect was being the best boyfriend," she chuckled a bit, glancing at her phone screen, "not like he was either way tho."

You tilted your head, curious at what she could meant with that sentence, Ellie brushed it off shrugging her shoulders and whispering a whatever you barely heard. Her hands reaching the car's key, the motor of it making a loud sound.

"Andrew broke up with me," you spoke fastly, almost without spaces between words. Ellie froze, the grip in the wheel softening as her eyes looked at you with open eyes in surprise.

"Andrew?" incredulously repeated, "Andrew Andrew? Like... the tall guy who's basically a himbo? Your boyfriend?"

"Oh my god, yes, Ellie, Andrew, my now ex-boyfriend... and he's not a himbo," eyebrows quirked as you spoke, your arm playfully hitting her shoulder making her chuckle and lick her bottom lip.

"Can't blame me, i wouldn't be surprised if he doesn't know where the clit is... actually, does he?" a big smirk on her mouth and eyes now centered to get out of the place she was parked to drive you home, or honestly drive you wherever you want. Ellie would deny it every time, but you had her how you wanted, you asked and she delivered. That made her feel like a loser lesbian but maybe she was for you.

You couldn't say something back because you weren't sure if he knew, he should know, he's all grown up and fucked more girls than you can count with your hands' fingers. But you weren't sure because Andrew never gave you head -because he said he didn't like it- or even fingered you, he was just into fucking you with his dick.

Ellie's smirk transformed into a sweet smile when she glanced at you for a moment when you kept your mouth shut, one of her hands leaving the wheel to rest it on your thigh, her thumb rubbing it with endearment as the rest of her hand got lost in the inner of your thigh, your mind starting to get dizzy once again.

"I'm just fuckin' with ya, want to talk about what happened, babe?" Ellie had the bad habit of using pet names when she was trying to be sweet and understanding, completely clueless at how 'pretty', 'babe', 'angel' coming from her mouth made your heart -and core- feel.

"It's just... i don't know," you scratched your head, Ellie's gaze on you again.

"What about you start telling me what happened because sorry, but mister perfect was really down bad for you," her eyes rolled at her final words. Ellie never said she hated Andrew, she didn't love him either and she made it obvious with her sarcastic jokes and faked gags whenever he was around you with his arms around your waist or hips but you never thought she hated him, just more that she found him annoying just like she found almost every guy except Jesse and Joel.

"He said i wasn't sure of my feelings for him," your eyes trailing to the front, trying to ignore her hand caressing your clothed thigh or how she examined you with her eyes every now and then, trying to disguise the fact she was the whole reason why you weren't sure of your feelings from your ex boyfriend.

"And you are?"

"I think i've never been sure of my feelings for him," your hands starting to get sweaty from your fear of talking to much and say things you shouldn't.

Ellie hummed, "and why you dated him? He was handsome and shit but dude didn't have much else-"

"Because i liked someone else... and she would never give a shit about me in that way so i guess i thought dating a popular pretty guy would change my feelings, i guess it didn't" your voice interrupted Ellie's, you weren't sure of what you wanted to reach driving the conversation to this topic, maybe just free your chest from this heavy feeling you had been hiding for almost the start of your friendship with Ellie.

No, you couldn't make yourself speak more, you couldn't drop a 'i liked you and i still like you, Ellie' from your mouth.

"You never know, maybe you should try to make a move," Ellie tried to sound lighthearted but she could swore her heart skipped a few beats at your words. Her mind starting roam through her thoughts: what if it's me. There's no fucking way it's me. She just sees you as a friend, Ellie. Don't be delusional, it's probably another girl.

"Maybe," a giggle escaped your lips, just if she knew you were talking about her, "let's not talk about my ex boyfriend more, distract my mind, miss Ellie Williams," your voice sounding playful and your brows wiggling. Ellie was a tease but you could be more and drove Ellie crazy, most of the times making her hard to play it cool.

"Sorry, i don't fuck with girls who just got out of relationships," her green orbs looking directly at you, taking advantage of the stop, "and i don't fuck them either," eyes again locked at the road, the car accelerating at green and your heart about to combust at her words, you hated how easily she would drop shit like that, like it was nothing.

"Whatever, your loss," you rolled your eyes as Ellie's brows quirked at your phrase without looking at your direction, an entertained smile drew all over her lips, "where are we goin'?"

"You choose, Miss Daisy, i can drive you home or we can get something to eat and chit chat in a empty parking lot until the sun rises. Personally 'm starving."

"Something's even open?" your choice already settled without the need of more words.

Ellie's proposal wasn't something you were a stranger of, actually, you couldn't count how many times you both ended up in deserted parking lots with junk food and just the company of each other, specially if one of you was down or just after some party. Feeling like a whole eternity since the last time happened and not because of Ellie's fault but yours, you never distanced from your best friend, you just marked some... distance to try to get your mind off of her but there you were once again, your heart in the palm of your hand and your eyes trailing back and forth from her slim figure.

"There has to be."

A shared precooked meal and joint with Ellie felt like it was what you needed so everything felt right again. Your mind hazy, more than you expected to be when the auburn haired girl offered it to you, probably because you were the one who smoked the most, Ellie almost rejecting every time you handed her the burned paper, maybe she wasn't the most responsible but she was conscious she had to drive you and herself back home.

"I'm gonna have to pay for it?" your chin pointed to the cigarette butt resting in the small, handmade ashtray she had in the car.

Ellie side eyed, first looking at you and later where your chin was pointing. A cheeky grin portrayed on her face, "do you? maybe i would consider a pretty girl discount," her voice cocky, she was playing with you like she always did, "of course you don't have to pay, i offered it to you."

"You're such a loser for the pretty girl discount anyway," your shoulders shrugged, your friend's eyebrows knitted making an expression of the fuck you mean with that which you ignored, "kinda offensive you just hinted you wouldn't do a pretty girl discount for me."

It was kinda funny for her you said she was a loser for the pretty girl discount because until not long ago she kinda was, not like she invited every girl she dealed to but her pretty girl discounts were more of a you're really pretty to pay for my weed instead of a i would fuck you so you don't need to pay, so she stopped when she realized some girls misinterpreted her actions and also because even though you were really pretty to pay for her weed she would also fuck you. Of course she wouldn't say that out loud.

"You're so dramatic, god," her words making you lift one of the corners of your mouth but you didn't answer, enjoying the few cars passing by and the soft night light of the city that was mixed with the yellowish streetlights and the cold light of the moon and stars, her raspy voice breaking the silence, "i guess we're both single again.... aaaand we're arriving too."

You hummed to her last words, your mind more centered about the 'we're both single' part. You totally forgot for a moment Ellie and Cat broke up not long ago as well, you didn't know the exact reasons since when you asked she just said it wasn't really working, that Cat was nice and shit but she wasn't really what Ellie wanted and her words really caught you by surprise. As her best friend you knew Ellie was more of a quality time and gifts type of girl, but when you hangout with them and some more friends a few times them both didn't know how to keep their hands to themselves. Fingers locked, sweet cheek kisses, whispers at each other's ear with giggles Intercalated and fast lovely stares from Ellie's side that sometimes traveled to you but she quickly looked away when your eyes interlocked with jewel like eyes, so of course it caught you by surprise when she told Cat wasn't what she wanted.

"I guess so," you spoke with your eyes glued go the streets outside the car's window, the small block of apartments you lived in entering in your sight and almost every parking space occupied, which made Ellie pant, there was nothing she hated most than searching for a place to park. In the middle of the night. At fucking 3 am, "looks like your ex moved on pretty quick tho."

It was true, even though you were never close to Cat you both had a gentle relationship of acquaintances so it was no weird you followed each other on Instagram, making it impossible to not see the story she posted last night. Cat's waist wrapped by some cute masc's arm, the face of the unknown girl rested in her shoulder as the asian showed to the camera some shot she was taking at a party with blinking neon lights that could make you go blind and some cute love song usually related to the wlw community, the story basically screaming there was something going on between Cat and that other girl.

The freckled girl next to you couldn't help but chuckle at your words, your commentary catching her by surprise as she devised a free spot where she could park.

"Yeah... it's whatever, so have i," she brushed it off, more concentrated on parking -since she was a really careful driver- than how your eyes were blazing at the sight of her.

Of how her hands had a tight grip of the wheel, or how she bites her bottom lip in frustration when she was trying to get the car in the right angle. Your pupils started to roam to sinful places, or at least places you shouldn't be looking like her thighs hugged by her skinny jeans or wondering what she could hide being her pants and her top, even asking yourself if she ever wore a strap outside of the room, completely ecstatic at the thought of her hiding a plastic cock behind those really tight jeans. Your were knees getting weak and your fists clenching as an attempt to calm whatever Ellie was waking up by just... existing?

And of course you couldn't keep your mouth shut, you didn't know how to, more when you were high.

"Proof?" the words slipping your lips faster than your brain had the time to analyze them, the reflex of slapping your hand to your mouth almost automatic but it was too late, Ellie already heard you and if only you could hear her heart beating fast and her mind in panic all the fear that soaked your body would disappear in an instant. Ellie's eyes widened, her chill and playful facade falling apart for a few seconds which she quickly recovered hoping you didn't realize her moment of weakness.

With a dangerous smirk Ellie turned to look at you, her slightly dilated pupils looking up and down at you, "proof?" her voice cooed, her body inclinated to your direction, you gave her an opportunity and she was gonna take it without doubt, "proof would ruin our friendship," her face close to your own more than ever, her right hand leaving the wheel to touch your chin just like she did hours before but this time it was different. Her touch was edging sinful, intoxicating, the growing tension making you swallow with difficult as your thighs pressed together, and she noticed it, she finally catch up the effect she had on you and your body; she always knew she did something to you but never really stopped to think about it until that moment.

Her mind running through all the possibilities able to happen, how your body gave her the hint she could take you to the backseat and eat your heated cunt in that moment, just the thought making her own pussy wet and needy, almost impossible for her to contain the action of cup it over her jeans.

"And we don't want our friendship ruined, right, pretty?" her voice so sweet, so sugar coated, the pads of her fingers leaving your chin once again, just like before. It's not what she wanted, she wanted to eat you in every way possible, thinking about how good her lips would feel against your glossy ones, she was craving for you like you were but she didn't want it to happen that way.

She was scared. She didn't know if you could regret once the heated was gone, if you maybe just wanted Andrew out of your head, she didn't want her heart broke and she wanted you completely conscious and right on your mind. Fuck, behind her cocky smile and confident eyes she was shitting her pants.

But you wouldn't let it go like that.

"Wait!" your hand reaching and grabbing her wrist, "what do you mean?" a flirtatious smile on your lips without you realizing.

You were really making the game difficult to Ellie, if you continued acting like that she was gonna throw everything away and just do it, just surrender to her lustful feelings. And she was about to do it.

"Are you playing dumb or do you want me to be straight forward?" she said in an undertone.

"I want you... to show it if you wanna make this a lil' more interesting," your head tilting slightly with a flirty manner. You made your mind, you won't retreat this time, you didn't know if it was your own confidence or the weed you consumed that gave you the strength to not be scared, or at least not terrified.

Despite the fact Ellie's heart was about to jump out of her chest she did a really good job hiding it with her slick grin growing bigger, sated at your curiosity, at your need and he was gonna reward it... kinda.

You saw her face suddenly getting closer to yours, one of her hands placing now in the side of your thigh almost on your hip, squeezing it, and the other resting in back of your seat, helping her to maintain balance. Her lips ghosting over your own, making you unconsciously close your eyes, awaiting for her chapped warm lips finally pressed against you.

The sight of you with eyes closed, looking almost like an angel, and your lips parted made Ellie even more aroused, you looked so pretty like that and it was something only her could see in that moment, only for her.

To your surprise your glossy lips never met the warm of Ellie's but your ear did, a low chuckle before she spoke slowly and patiently, with such a provocative tone, "if you're that desperate for proof i can show you tomorrow, sweet girl," her lips skimming your earlobe so close to kissing it, your only response was almost a whimper, you couldn't wait.

"But-"

"Tomorrow," her tone demanding this time, "now go, it's really late."

It was late and Ellie's cunt was so heated, her boxers a mess, that she needed you out of her car so she could take care of it just like you needed too.

⠀⠀⠀

Each other's fingers meeting your respective soaked cores, you thinking how full could Ellie make you feel and Ellie thinking how much she wanted to make you a mess of moans and whimper for her and her fingers, just the moon knowing your sinful actions.

[whitehotwild]

i've never done an anon before so i'm so sorry if it sounds weird 😭😭 but do you think billy and his younger s/o would go to like, those summer carnivals? like, the ones that are at night? idk if that's js in my hometown tho 😭 she most definitely dragged him there and he reluctantly went bc he loves her, but lwk he ends up enjoying it. idkkk i js feel like there isn't enough soft!billy content on here and you are my only supplier of it 🙏🙏

OUUUUUUUU OU OU OU you just scratched an itch... im so giddy about this. (also ily and i'll gladly be ur supplier)

we only have fall carnivals in my town which sucks bc summer carnivals sound so much more fun.

you like... heard from a friend that there's this one in NJ, you try to convince butcher to go with you. you tell him that it's only 2 hours by way of penn station (nightmare nightmare nightmare), that he doesn't have to drive you, that you'll buy the entry tickets.

"let's just go to coney island, yeah? i'm not goin' to bleedin' New Jersey for a night just because you wanna ride some roller coasters. you got a ride right here..." he smirks, thinking he's oh so clever.

all it does is make you whine and go limp in his hold, "but pleeeeeeease??? It'll be fun! you're such a fucking party pooper."

it doesn't ever take much to make him give into you, that's his one weakness, "i ain't no fuckin' 'party pooper'. you're just a pain in me arse."

"okay... so are we going or not?"

butcher sighs with an unimpressed look on his face, "fine."

and then like when you're actually at the carnival, you make good on your promise to buy the entry tickets (wristbands whatever), and butcher pays for the games/rides.

after half an hour, he's spent only about $20, "I ain't spendin' over 50 bucks, got it?"

at the moment, you're more worried about what you're gonna get from the food truck than anything coming out of his mouth, "mhm. yup, got it."

you beg him to get on one of the rides with you and he finally gives in after a while, but the second you get off the ride he's looking at you like he kinda wants to kill you... just a little bit.

"you're tryna give me a bloody heart attack. i ain't doing that again."

(i'll die on the hill that butcher hates roller coasters just because i think it would be very funny.)

$100 and two hours later, butcher's finally cutting you off after winning you one of those big teddy bears from one of the game booths.

(yes, he knows he said $50. yes, he knows he's wrapped around your little finger)

"you happy, pet?" he asks you once you both settle on the train back to the city. there's no snark in his voice like you'd expect, just genuinely wanting to know that you had a good night.

you nod against his shoulder, your legs propped up in the empty seat in front of you, "yeah, i'm happy. you happy?"

butcher looks down at you, the way your head rests against him, the way your arm is snaked through his. he allows himself, just for a moment, to believe that he does deserve this... that he does deserve you and the joy you bring back to him.

"i suppose so. you like your bear?" he nudges you gently, motioning to where you sat the big stuffed bear in the seat in front of him.

"mhm... gonna name it 'billy jr.'" you tease with a tired smile, you're halfway to falling asleep and the train's barely left the station.

billy (sr.) huffs, unimpressed, but there's a small smile on his face, he untangles his arm from yours and wraps it around your shoulders, covering your eyes with his hand as he pulls you a bit closer into his side.

"ah, fuck off... you're delirious, go to sleep."

୨ ♡ ୧

just wanna say sorry that im not getting to requests as quick as i'd like! got a lot of shit happening atm BUT im on vacay atm so hopefully i can pump some out this week! LOVE YOU BYEEEE!

[apollosgiftofprophecy]

not sure if anyone's asked you this before/yet, but so you have any opinions or thoughts of the relationship between all of the pantheons? general relationship and possibly some more personal ones?

I've read many different headcanons and fanfiction where people have mentioned their thoughts on it, but nothing they've ever gone into detail about.

there's nothing really preventing them from interacting *👀 I keep remembering the smallest tiniest hint of freypollo we got* but that doesn't mean they go out of their way doing it, yk?

OKAY SO-

The pantheons I'll be mainly focusing on are the Greek, Roman, Norse, & Egyptian ones. I'll probably make little nods to other ones too tho :3

Don't be surprised if this mainly centers on Apollo XD He's my guy <3

GREEK & ROMAN

Let's kick it off with these two!

"But aren't they the same-?"

Nope! The Roman pantheon started off as their own sets of gods - the thing is, they had very little myths written down so we don't know much about how they were characterized :(

Howmever. We do know that when they were synchronized with Greece's gods, you can see the little differences between them - for instance, the Roman gods were more Forces Of Nature than gods who went out and Did Stuff, like Greece's.

Jupiter for example! He didn't have the "fucks around" rep Zeus does! Jupiter from the Roman's perspective didn't go out and do much. He rooted on Aeneus, yes, but the myths of his children weren't quite as popular in Rome as they were in Greece (probably because they were. ya know. Greek heroes, and not Roman)

And Apollo. Oh, Apollo...the only major god who didn't have a Latin equivalent.

Rome loved you so much they adopted you and went "no. no. he was always here. no we aren't lying. see? he's in the Dii Consentes!" XD

Fun Fact: Apollo is basically multiple gods in a trench coat. Paion (Mycenean), Smitheus (Mycenean), Aplu (Etruscan), Apaulinus (Hittie), Grannus (Celtic), ect were all Apollo-equivalents who historians have concluded to be past incarnations of Apollo!

which is INTERESTING because...do those gods still exist in the RRverse? Are they connected to Apollo in some way? Are they little voices in his head? DO THEY HAVE DRINKS TOGETHER?

I have questions and I need answers.

Greek & Egyptian

Saving the Norse for last because we all wanna save Freypollo for last <3 the best for last lmao

RIGHT OFF THE BAT I'M GONNA SAY THAT ZEUS DOESN'T LIKE THE OTHER PANTHEONS! I BET HE DOESN'T!

Which sucks for him because Apollo has friends in Egypt XD

I do think Apollo and Horus would be friends! Not only are they both associated with the sun in some way, but they were actually identified with each other when Greece met Egypt!

Greece: Oh so you have a super-powerful son of the king of the gods associated with light? So do we! :D

Egypt: Oh my gosh we do! :D

You know the myth of Typhon? Apollo transformed into a hawk to escape, and you know who has a hawk head?

Horus. :D

also Horus took over the thrown from Osiris - sure, not in an overthrow way but still. he overthrew Set and claimed the throne

sounds like something we all want hmm...

Also, I headcanon that Helios and Ra go WAAAAYYYY back and Apollo only met Ra like. once. before Isis did her blackmailing and Ra disappeared.

SO WHEN RA CAME BACK, WHICH WOULD HAVE BEEN DURING HOO BTW, APOLLO HAS NO IDEA! HE'S ON DELOS AT THAT POINT! THEN HIS TRIALS!

So when he rolls up to the next sun god meeting he sees Ra and is like "wait what who are you- OH WAIT!"

And Ra's like; "WHO LET THIS CHILD BE PUT IN CHARGE OF THE SUN???"

Apollo: I'm over 4,000 years old-

Ra, pointing: BABY

(Headcanon that Ra & Amaterasu are like. the defacto sun god 'leaders' who keep the meetings rolling. Amaterasu was very tired when Ra disappeared and she had to wrangle these fiery gods together XD)

(Also Helios thought Horus was a lil' upstart XD)

Finally, I also saw someone else mention that Apollo could have learned some Egyptian magic and used it to create the border of CHB!

Headcanon Hecate snuck along with him and it's their little secret :3

Greek & Norse

HERE. WE. ARE.

LEMME GET MY MAP OUT

SO.

Green highlight is where Greece is. Blue is where Hyperborea is (see this post for details)

In that post, I came to the conclusion that Apollo Totally Definitely Has Met Norse Gods BECAUSE OF HIS WINTER VACATIONS!

AND IF YOU LOOK ACROSS THE BALTIC SEA-

STOCKHOLM.

AND WHERE DID APOLLO MEET THAT HOT GOD WITH A TALKING SWORD???

A TAVERN. IN. STOCKHOLM!

FREYPOLLO LIVES (<-knows very well it's basically already canon XD)

Fun fact: the people of Hyperborea were most likely the mythological avatars of the Norse people! :D

SO I CONCLUDE-

Apollo takes a trip across the Baltic Sea and flirts in the Stockholm tavern and that's how Freypollo happens <3

Other Pantheon Thoughts

Hindu: This thought came while I was creating my @underrated-lovers-of-apollo-poll - Apollo & Indra!

They shared an elephant ride that one time! Wouldn't it be fun if they also kissed? :3

also Indra is a storm god with thunder and lightning think of the angst-

Shinto: Amaterasu taught Apollo Japanese when he discovered the haiku for the first time - sadly, only Athena ever bothered to learn it to experience the haiku in its fullest. pushing my sibling agenda again haha

Because haikus always sound better in their native language <3

Hittie: This connects to the 'Apollo trenchcoat' thing earlier - if Apollo is like. the current form of Apaulinus, would the Hittie pantheon like. drop in from time to time like 'heyyyy we miss you <3'

Apollo: *trojan war flashbacks*

Apaulinus was heavily associated with Wilusa, whom historians have confirmed was Troy, and Apollo's first temple doesn't show up under AFTER the bronze age collapse and the war happened BEFORE that happened meaning HE WAS APAULINUS WHEN THE WAR HAPPENED MY HEART-

i need to look into more pantheons. it's so much fun making these connections and coming up with headcanons for the RRverse :3

[hzbinnerdlover]

Late Evening sickness (Part 2)

(I gotta request to do a part 2- and I couldn't resist so here's that lol. Enjoy!)

Val laid in the bed as he ate the takeout that Vox had promised him, yearning and missing his TV demon husband. Vox had to suddenly rush back to work after breakfast, some kind of emergency or something which pisses him off, but he understood since he could just take the elevator back to their floor easily. So the rest of the day Kitty took care of him, bringing him drinks and water and tissues, anything he could need really.

Val whined as he laid back against his pillow and felt his throat, the soreness coming through as he sighed. "Goddammit. Course this fucking happens to me." Giving a stuffy sniffle he goes back to his phone for entertainment.

"This fucking blows! I just...want....gah...GA'SHOO!!! ECK'SHUU!!! HIP'SHUUUU!!! Ugh...."

"Bless you beautiful", Val perked up as he looked over, seeing Vox standing in the doorway as he smiled softly. "How are we feeling hm? Any better?" He asks as he takes off his suit jacket and hangs it up, clearing his throat a bit.

"Yeah, better. The medicine helps a lot. Makes me feel a little less congestion, sneeze a bit less. But I still feel like shit", Val sighs as he grabs a tissue and blows his nose, sighing in relief afterwards and tossing it away. "Yeah well, you'll probably be sick for at least a few more days Val. That's typically how colds work." Vox goes over to his drawer as he starts taking off his bowtie, back turned towards Val as he's putting it away in the drawer. Giving a loud whine Val shakes his head. "Yeah well I hate it! I just want it to stop! It just hurts and makes me cold, and it's worse if you can't be here with me and I feel so-"

"Hzztu!" A small noise interrupts Val, leaving the moth rather confused as he looks around. "The fuck- did you hear that?" Vox shrugged as he started making hus way towards his closet and rubs eyes, looking for something more comfortable as he removed his vest.

"Huh- well. What was I saying? Right. Being sick is a fucking BITCH! I'm telling ya! My fucking nose is gonna fall off from all this fucking sneezing, I can't stand it. It just makes it....all the....heh...", Val hitches slightly as tho about to sneeze before he hears another small sound. "H-Hzztu!" Val immediately stops and blinks, the sound distracting him from his sneeze as he groans. "Dammit Vox, is something glitching in here? If so it's pissing me off."

"Sorry baby, not sure what it is. I'll have to check it out in a bit." He sighs as he looks around for something, giving a slight shiver. "Shit. Val, have you seen my hoodie? The blue one with the Giant shark on the back?"

"Huh? Oh. Pretty sure it's in the very back there hon. You haven't worn that one in awhile-"

Vox rolled his eyes and reaches back as he starts pulling it out with a pair of pj pants, quickly changing as Val continues his rant, "Ugh they really did make this hell didn't they? It's unbelievable!!!" He gives an eye roll as he coughs a bit.

Vox rubs his head, getting tired of all the whining. "I know it sucks Val, but I'm sure you'll feel better soon. Can we not talk about this right now...? My head is pounding..."

"Well- this was gonna happen whether you were here now or earlier- so it's happening now cause I've barely had anyone to talk to except texting Velvette! And that isn't very-" he stops when he notices Vox's eyes close and tilts his head confused. "Vox- shit does it hurt that bad...?"

Vox simply nodded as he turned his back to him, raising a sleeve to his face as another sound came out. "Hzztu!!! Hzztu!!!"

Val raises an eyebrow at him and blinks. "So that is you? The fuck kind of noises are you making there, it's hard to tell"

Vox groaned as he looked at him with a slightly annoyed look. "Look can I just get 5 minutes to just...think things throught...I....heh...." shutting his eyes again Vox shook his head, no longer able to stifle.

"H-HIT'ZZZZZZUUUUUU!!!", giving a groan as he swiped hie hand across his face, his cheeks giving a slightly flushed look as he looks at Val. Val stared back, the two of them going into a silence for a moment before the moth finally spoke. "......YOU'RE FUCKING SICK TOO?!?!"

"Um well- just a little Val- it's fine. Not a big de-"

"Dont start with that shit!!! Did you go to fucking work like this?! While you were fucking sick?!"

"Uuuuuuuuh-" Vox blinked as he looked away, thinking back to earlier today.

(Earlier that day)

Vox groaned as he starts walking down to the office. "Jesus this fucking sucks....course I have to get sick same fucking day Val does. H-Hzztu!!!", he stifles into his sleeve to try to keep the sneezes as hidden as he can. He did NOT want anyone else to know he was sick around here. Quickly he got into his office and sighed in relief. "Thank god...I just stay in here, and no one has to know."

He walks over to hus chair and slumps down, sighing as he pulls up hus forms and emails and starts getting to work. Hearing footsteps enternhe groans and turns around.

"Yes? Who the fuck is-" he then saw it was hid assistant, Eli, giving a smile with some of paperwork and reports he no doubt had to share. "M-Mr.Vox, I have this week's reports to read to you sir." Of course he did. Of course he fucking did. Vox sighed and stood back up as he walked over. "Fine fine, let's just get this over with. Quickly please."

"O-Oh right- so. There was an incident this week with the marketing department, but it should be relatively easy for us to fix and-", Eli swished his eel tail back and forth as he continued reading the rest of the messages and reports that came for this week. Vox could barely pay attention tho as he felt a familiar itch hitting his face. Trying desperately not to focus on it he mentally told himself, "No no, come on not now. Please", but it was no use. The itch was pursuing and there was no way to stop it.

Seeing Eli was focused on the task at hand Vox quickly turned away to attempt to stifle again. "H'zzztu! H'zzztu!"

Eli blinked for a moment as his eyes looked up from the paper. "Did you say something sir?"

Vox sniffed as he shook his head. "No, nothing. Please continue" he insisted as he put hid hands behind his back. Unfortunately stifling all the time like this just made Vox's nose itch even more, so badly that as Eli went back to his reports, Vox's breath started hitching a bit.

It only got deeper and deeper, more noticeably audible as Eli once again looked up rather concerned. "Sir...?"

Vox shook his head as he tries to fight it back. "D-Dont worry about it, i-it's j-just heh...." Turning away again he knew he couldn't hold back. "H-HZZZZZTUUU!!!!!", sneezing loudly this time around he groaned in annoyance, feeling his nose run as he sniffled.

"Oh! Bless you Mr.Vox! Are you feeling well there...?" Vox nodded as he attempted to respond. "I'm fine, I'm just- TSK'SHIEEEW! HIT'ZUUUUU! Ugh....I'm fine." He finally spits out with a damp sniffle and another groan.

Eli looks at him rather worried, reaching for something in his pocket. "Um, if you don't mind me sir, I believe I have something that'll help." Giving a warm smile he pulls out a travel sized packet of tissues and holds them out to his TV demon boss.

Looking over slowly he glances at the tissues, sighing in defeat as he reaches over and takes one from the pack. "Ugh, thank you. Just don't tell- ACK'SHEEEW! Scuse me, don't tell anyone about this okay?"

He then let's out a gurgling blow into the tissue and let's out cough.

"Yes sir of course. Feel free to take the rest of the pack if you need it, and if you're falling ill I can bring some lemon tea for you. I imagine your throat must hurt."

Vox nods as he sighs and takes the pack of tissues finishing up wiping his nose with the wet used one. "Thank you...that would be wonderful. I'm gonna try to get some work done, don't let anyone else in for the day." Sighing he watches Eli leave and goes back to his work, slumping in his seat as he focuses at the task at hand.

(Back to the present)

Val gave a heavy sigh and facepalms. "You fucking idiot-"

"I had to Val! There's was shit that needed to be done!"

"Oh please, I'm sure your little assistant could've handled everything just fine. Now you listen to- Dammit hold on-" Val turns away and inhales sharply as another sneeze fit goes through. "Ech'shuuu! HI'CHUUU!!! IP'SHUUUU!!! Heh...HICK'CHUUU!!! ACHIEEEW!!!! Fucking christ"

He sniffles loudly as he groans and grabs a couple tissues, blowing his nose into them with a heavy breath.

Vox rolled his eyes as he mutters under his breath. "Bless you...can you not get on my- Hzztu!" Turning into his sleeve he let out a few stifled sneezes. "Hzzztu! Hzztu! Hzztu! Ugh..."

Raising an eyebrow Val rolled his own eyes and gave a slightly amused chuckle. "Bless YOU, Cariño, you really should stop trying to stifle them. It just makes the itch worse. Tho I'm sure you know that at this point." He grabs the tissue box and holds it out. "You need one?"

Vox nods as he groans. "God yes please, I ran out in the office." He walks over, hovering a bit as he shivered and coughs. Reaching out he grabs one immediately. "Thank you- Hzzztu! Thank you so much." Giving a sniffle he wipes his nose before coughing again.

"Voxieeeee, now what was I saying before hm? As amusing as thus is~ You're not doing yourself any favors." Vox shot him a glare as he finishes mopping up his face. "Oh fuck you, it's a hard habit to kill okay? I'm used to it. Heh....oh fuck..." Throwing the tissue out he breathes deeply for what he assumes is an incoming sneeze, only for it to get stuck as he stops and groans. "Come ooooon, seriously?" Plopping onto the bed he looks at Val desperately. "Vaaaaal it's stuck"

Val gives a slight chuckle to which Vox gives a slightly annoyed look. "You little- heh....heh....gaaaah dammit stop laughing at me!!! I'm serious I just wanna fucking-" he stops when Val leans over and gives a simple blow of air towards Vox's face.

"Heh.....heh....", suddenly the tickle came back in an instant, freeing his poor sinuses. "Heh....HICK'SHUUUUUU!!!!! ECK"CHHHUUU!!!! HIT'ZUUUUU!!!! H-HECHEEEEW!!!! HECHEW!!!! HECHEW!!!! HECHEW!!!! Hi....HET'ZZZZZZZUUUUU!!!!" Once the fit finally ended the bedroom lights flickered, and Vox was out of breath, his nose running like a faucet as he sniffled.

"Ugh....fuck that was gross...", Vox groaned as Val laughed a bit, grabbing some more tissues and passing them along. "Sorry, figured you'd want that pesky itch out."

Rolling his eyes Vox took the tissues gratefully, blowing heavily into them and snatching the box to repeat the process a couple times before finally finishing. "Ugh...where's that medicine i gave you this morning?" He asks through his raspy voice, laying down and cuddling close to his husband.

"Ah, I think it's over here", reaching over he hands it to Vox, the tv demon immediately taking two ofnthe pills and plopping back down. "I'm ready to fucking sleep...."

Val chuckles and nods as he lays down and holds the poor tv demon close. "Goodnight Voxie~ Dont worry, I'm sure you'll feel bet...better....fuck" He sniffles and rubs his nose.

Vox raises an eyebrow. "Val you...you good?" He starts to ask, feeling his own nose itch again as both demons are now left hitching for a moment till finally-

"HECK'SHUUUUU!!!", sniffling softly among themselves they blink at the realization of their shared sneeze before chuckling and closing their eyes, falling asleep with their love and sickness.

[rayofmisfortune]

Throwing this ask over for if you ever want to ramble about Bendy ✨/nf (we are getting fed lately, 3 more games??? A movie??? Ink demon at a rave??? What???)

BENDY RAMBLE PERMISSION? OH HECK YEA!!

We are SO getting fed! I can't wait for what the games have in store for us. With The Cage supposed to release some time this year ANS THE MOVIE??? OH DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THAT!

I love the Bendy series to bits. Like actually

I've been keeping up with it since chapter 3 of BATIM- haven't read any of the books sadly but that can be excused right???

ANYWAY

The Cage is supposed to be a look behind the scenes at what happened on the other side of things while Audrey was busy explaining the concept of personal space to Wilson, if I remembee right? Also supposed to be darker and gorrier SUPER EXCITED FOR THAT

Then... in Secrets of the Machine we get teasers for B3ndy and Bendy Silent Town...

I hope B3ndy's gonna pick up on where BATDR left off, Gent taking away the Ink Machine to GOD KNOWS WHERE??? With Bendy now being out in the real world... it begs the question of who the role of big bad and smiling (traumatized, very much traumatized) will fall on... As for who we may play as.... maybe it could be this Riley Wells (hope I got the surname right) character we found out about in Secrets of the Machine? They ended up being a GENT employee so it's not completely out the question? They were employed at Joey Drew Studios before but- got fired because their ideas were too grotesque and dark for Joey's liking (EXCUSE THEM for having trauma you entrepreneur a-hole).

As for Bendy Silent Town... I feel like that game may be a look at mayhaps the genre of Bendy cartoons Riley had scripted? As I said, their ideas were dark. And what is Silent Town? A complete turn to the left at what Bendy games are. Unsure if the hand in the teaser image is Bendy's but- the char has a revolver named Alice FJFJ does that say anything? I dunno! Fjfjfj Getting to shoot cartoon bad guys in a cartoon tho? Aw heck yea! I suck at shooters but I'm willing to try my hand at one if it's Bendy

This is getting long lmfao

AH I haven't realized, but Secrets of the Machine came out on 4/14 (cuz- not american, use a different date format heh) which is the last loop that took place before Wilson or Audrey right? Some significance there

Oml I'm gonna fall into rambling about Bendy and the Ink Demon aren't I?

When you break all the cutouts in Secrets of the Machine, you get instakilled by the Ink Demon. Which. Deserved. I ended up doing that a lot cuz I didn't KNOW what I was supposed to do??? And destroying the cutouts was the quickest way out nfjfjc sorry Benders I promise it wasn't personal.

Anywho- yea it's been over a year YET I'M STILL NOT OVER HOW THE INK DEMON LITERALLY HAD BEEN TORTURED BY THE KEEPERS??? Like- YOU CAN'T JUST THROW THAT AT ME AND NOT EXPECT ME TO WEEP LIKE A BABY- My man's gone through literal hell even before he's been carelessly thrown into the machine "because he was imperfect" my ass, I bet the worst he ever did while in the Real world was walk around and be curious about everything while the only thing decisively threatening about him was his appearance... WHICH ALSO he had nothing to do with??? That's all on Joey and GENT for fucking up and only looking at the outside and not the inside. Is it obvious how much I need this guy to have a happy life?? He has a chance for that with Audrey now which I'm honestly so damn glad for nfnfnc Poor guy had been forced to follow a predetermined script where he was cast as the villain... tbf.. wouldn't anyone end up embracing that role when they've had to go through it for hundreds of loops?? I'd grow tired of trying to change anything as well.

Can... can you imagine? A little scene with Audrey and Bendy in B3ndy where they're just hanging out with eachother in Audrey's apartment.... PLEASE

Ah this got long hehe nfnfjfb

ALSO still not over Henry. My favorite father figure. Pls be a dad to them I beg

I STILL DUNNO WHAT THE RAVE IS ABT 😭😭 Haven't seen anything abt it YET- BUT AYYYYY

AND OML YEA THE MOVIE PLEASE GIB SOME BEFORE THE INK WORLD SNIPPETS PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE?? Could you imagine? Just- getting to see how the studio was before it all went to hell??? I- GETTING TO SEE THE PROGRESS ON THE INK MACHINE??? MAYBE EVEN BENDY'S CREATION????? And and oml SAMMY before he went "My Lord, My Saviour, coocoo in the head" THE VAST WORLD OF POSSIBILITIES

[everythingwasnormalhere]

Headcanons for Butters?

got asked for butters twice so giving him priority >:3

tw: abuse

this is canon: his parents fucking suck

and they progressively get worse as he grows up

at 11-12 starts trying to revel

small things only, like wearing small stuff he likes or hanging out with his friends for longer than what he's allowed to

he slowly changes his style to goth (~13yo)

and the goths adopt him, for a period of a few months in which he becomes real hardcore

but he grows tired of being sad all the time

then his style evolves into something closer to punk? he's not trying to fit into any aesthetic tho, just what's more comfortable/cooler (~14yo)

like, still dark and all but doesn't mind adding extra colors :)

back to his parents, this causes a shit ton of trouble with them

they beat him up and grounded him one day when he returned home at 2am reeking cigarrete (he was hanging out with the goth kids)

(that happened more often but this time his parents were even angrier than usual) (also he was 13 idk if yall got it but anyway)

then they locked him up in his room, as in literally locked him up

he stayed there sobbing for a couple hours but then he got fed up

he climbed out his window and ran to kenny's house

cuz he was panicking and had no idea of who else he could turn to

he told kenny what happened and so kenny let butters stay at his for as long as he wanted

since then butters almost doesn't spend any time at his parents' house

instead he sleeps at a friend's, mostly kenny, stan, and craig

jimmy and kyle would offer too but their parents wouldn't approve and/or would tell the stotchs

at 14 he got his ears pierced by kenny

they looked fucking awesome (slay)

obviously leaving home caused him sm mental issues

he has breakdowns real often, his friends have grown used to help him out with these

he can't stand loud noises for the life of him

has autism (diagnosed), C-PTSD and bipolar-2 (undiagnosed)

his hair is always dyed funky bright colors ✨

his favs are magenta and purple

he even convinced kenny to let him dye highlights on his own :)

he also wears silly little trinkets everywhere

he has big black boots (with huge platforms slay) and they're full of stickers and tiny charms

and he loves wearing fishnets :)

he wears eyeliner all the time! he makes it look so pretty istg

he has the scar from the shuriken incident + is basically blind on that eye, but he doesn't mind it anymore

he has a great relationship with all the boys at school!

besides cartman, butters learnt what he did to him and so now he hates him

he's tryna fix what he did to girls too, his relationship with them is slowly improving

him and heidi rant about cartman's bs to each other quite often

they're sorta besties

butter's best friend is definitely kenny but heidi is the one he's closest to at least out of the girls

at school he's mid at everything

he enjoys more artsy classes because they're more fun tho :)

he likes painting and writing

he's been questioning his gender for a while, currently he goes by all pronouns to try them out (I'm only using he/him here to not make it confusing TwT)

he's pansexual :3

and possibly asexual? or some kid of ace-spec probably

he still goes out as chaos from time to time

kenny, clyde and him are actually the only ones who still go out as their supersonas

he and kenny bond with craig over their shared autism :3

it's a huge spectrum and they're each at one completely different point of it, but they still relate to each other and they like that :D

he does know how to swear, but he doesn't do it

besides on special occassions :)

whenever he swears everyone around him is so shocked

"wHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN CURSE"

butters loves this XD

i think that's it! not counting his parents he's having a great time :)

[bazthefirstborn]

AFAB Diluc HC's

a/n: HEY GOD...ME AGAIN

I have seen TOO many horny on mains for this man (me) and I need to get smthn smutty out of my system also hello again <3

I TRIED TO KEEP THIS AS GN AS POSSIBLE SORRY IF I SLIPPED UP

request me things plz send asks I am bored out of my mind and have nothing but time (I'm procrastinating)

thx to @diluy , @yymiya , @l1tw1ck , and ofc my love @saelipse for all of the inspo for this

enjoy whores <3

get u a man like him frfr

does not matter what you look like, you are literal heaven to him

wants to do everything for you, plz remind him to take care of himself

super sensitive to touch literally anywhere

HARDCORE VIRGIN before he met you

his first kiss, his first everything was you

the first time he squirted he was MORTIFIED

he had fingered himself like twice before you and it was nowhere NEAR what he expected with you

just blow his mind with anything plz he gets horny at the IDEA of kissing you

lil baby boy doesn't know what to do with himself before he's grinding on your thigh and cumming when you play with his nipples <333

blushes MEGA HARD at pet names, but he's secretly partial to puppy, angel, and darling (wym this is me projecting pfffft scoff)

literally the sweetest the morning after, gets you whatever you need, makes you breakfast, sits in bed with you, the works

will take days off without hesitation if you don't feel up to going with him to work

hates to admit how much he loves to watch you behind the bar making drinks and chatting with patrons

he absolutely LIVES on praise, no matter what

compliment him on his drink-making skills and his eyes will glaze over. into subspace SO FAST.

hates doing literally anything away from you after you get together

so clingy (no dad)

he also hates to admit it and will deny how wet he gets from just waking up next to you the night after

one thought and he's all wet again, trying to rub his thighs together nonchalantly and hope you don't notice

would literally cry every time you eat him out

wants you to fuck him over the bar of the Angel's Share after hours

libido is horny 25/8/366

refuses to look you in the eyes until he looks at you fucking him and he turns beet red REAL quick

loves when you finger him and suck on his clit <3333

at the end of the day, he gets home from work, and just sits on your face to get off

the only time he will allow any kind of quick sex is when he's tired

slow and rough preferably, regardless of what's happening

pull his hair while he's giving you head. do it. right now.

will cum untouched if you praise him while he's pleasing you

all you have to do is call him your good little slut and he is squirting all over the nearest surface

FIN.

e/n: so as you can see I absolutely hate this man >:( the worst character fr /j

thank you for reading if you got this far lmao

ily all thank u for the support babies college is hard :/ luv u tho <3

-ur friend bazzy

[notthewriteryourelookingfor]

I am at my fucking limit so buckle up:

Because I have adhd and anxiety and depression, I need to take melatonin to get to sleep at a reasonable time otherwise I'll be lying in bed for literal hours until I can fall asleep, doubly so if I take my adhd meds that day.

So I live in Australia and if you live in Australia you can't buy melatonin over the counter if you're under 55 (idk why I'm too tired to look up why) and I'm 29 so fuck me I'd need to get a prescription and then a months supply is like $30.

So I've been ordering melatonin from this place in the US which is about 5 months supply for about the same price maybe a lil extra for shipping like $50 for 150 tablets.

So when I realised I was getting low on them I went to the sight and ordered again.

Easy-peasy right?

Well it turned out that I had enough to get me to the last day of their delivery window (about the 27th of Feb) and I was like " ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ they're usually pretty quick with delivery so I should be ok" but then the 27th rolled around and no delivery.

So I checked the tracking and it hadn't been scanned since the 17th. It was in my country, in my state, but hadn't moved in 10 days.

So I looked and the company was using a new 3rd party delivery company and they Sucked. It was a continuous problem that they just didn't deliver packages, lost them, took months and months and months to deliver something to next door the facility.

So I got in contact with the American company and they're gonna send me a refund (more on that in a sec) and til then i was like "dear God ill have to order from Amazon 🤮) so I did.

Shipping cost more than the product but the delivery time was about a week and I'd found 2 of my old diazepam that I could take if I really needed to.

To note: I usually only take my meds for work, I can generally get by without them when I'm not working but now not taking them for work makes me feel like I am not being as useful/productive/etc as I could be and as a supervisor who is often the one in charge I need to be on the ball.

Amazon package was meant to come today.

I did get an Amazon package today but was it my desperately needed melatonin? No it was a fucking Christian self-help book:

Like does this look like medication to you?!?!?!

I get that mistakes happen but this is the 2nd issue I've had with this 1 thing.

Also as a queer satanist/witch it feels a lil insulting even tho it wasn't probably wasnt intentional at all and some Christian who wanted a self help book has been sent sleep medication like oops.

But that is not the end of the saga.

Luckily Amazon is on the ball about refunds and I was able to reorder the item (& a 2nd brand so we'll see who comes first) and paid extra for fast shipping. Even then it will take another week for it to arrive.

I have my supervisor shift on the weekend, I cannot be unmedicated for it but I will be running on 2 hours of sleep if I'm lucky.

If I didn't take the adhd meds I'd be on maybe 4 hours sleep so it's not much difference tbh.

But on top of all that: the refund from the 1st company (that I will never be going back to after this) was pending in my bank account. It had the amount ($95 cuz I ordered 3 bottles of 2 different strengths plus shipping) with a "this is pending" label.

It has now vanished from my account.

It is no longer pending but I also do not have the money.

I am giving them the 10 business days they said it'll take and if it's not in my account I am raining hell.

I work retail minimum wage, I live paycheque to paycheque, I cannot be out $95 with nothing to show for it.

10 business days is the 15th

My new order is meant to arrive on the 14th

We'll see what I get first, a refund from the person I ordered from in January or the replacement items I ordered Wednesday last week.

(Also the express shipping isn't much faster I just need it literally as soon as possible I am so tired)