#I'm not giving any context in english just accept this

[somethingstrangeishere]

TW: leprosy

Baldwin IV with his mommy 🥺

She tries to cheer up her precious boy by doing something sweet for him.

"No, my dear, those bandages don't make you any worse! Please stop putting yourself down for how you look...Look, I made a bow for you! You're cute. I love you, Baldwin."

***

I don't know if you've ever had similar thoughts...I just felt like speaking up. Honestly, it's very hard to put my thoughts and convey what I'm feeling (I'm not a writer and also not a native English speaker), and to be completely honest, as I think about it, my heart hurts and my eyes water. So if you read this - thank you, and sorry for taking up your time. If not - well, I've eased my soul one way or another by speaking out.

***

My heart melts at the thought of a warm, understanding and trusting relationship between parents and children, and I also love the dynamics of family relationships. In this context, mother/son. I don't know, and no one knows anymore, about the relationship Baldwin had with his mother, whether they were close, but I'm not relying on historical reference, but on my interpretation and feelings.

For a good loving mother, her child is the best, the most precious, the most loved and desired. But life does not always turn to you and your child in a good way. Some people are unlucky - whether you are a king or a peasant, a sinner or a saint - fate does not care.

How does a mother feel when her son is mortally ill? Put yourself in her shoes. Just try it.

***

You hold your newborn baby in your arms. Here it is, your little bundle of joy, so tiny, so adorable... You want to give him all the best, now your whole world is him, your little angel!

Your son is growing up, taking his first steps, saying his first words. You dream about his future, you love him so much...

Time passes, you live in love and care for him. And you hope that it will always be like this - or as long as possible...

...Now forget about it.

Suddenly you are hit with devastating news - your son has leprosy. It knocks you off your feet, it chokes you, it tramples you into the ground, tears your heart to pieces. At that moment, as soon as you find out, you see nothing in front of you and hear nothing. Your mind is empty, and there is only one thought of your son, your treasure. Doomed, cursed. If there really is a God, why did he let this happen? Why your child? They say leprosy is a curse from God. Why curse an innocent child?!

Pain, despair, anguish. You want to weep, You want to grab your son, hold him close and never let go. You realise he's doomed. But he doesn't realise it yet.

As time goes on, his health gets worse. Your baby does not understand what is happening to him - he is scared, he is confused, he is waiting for your support and comfort. You smile at him, you give him everything you can - but inside your heart is pounding and tearing as if it were breaking your ribs. Every night you're choked with tears. Your son is your flesh and blood, you gave him life, you brought him into this world, you condemned him to this existence...

Time passes, you do your best, but it seems as if God himself has turned away from you. You pray to all the saints, you beg the Virgin Mary - she is a mother too, she must hear, she cannot fail to understand! But nothing changes.

Your son is growing up, and every year his condition gets worse. His skin is covered with leprosy spots. His eyesight is getting worse. He's always tired, he can't live without the help of doctors and medicines. He's rotting alive. People look askance. People judge. People see a monster. All you see is your angel. Every day you swear to love and care for him, swear you won't leave him...

***

A young 16 years old boy wins a battle. How proud you are of him! How weak his body is, but how strong his spirit. But he too has his moments of vulnerability...

...Especially when he fully realises he doesn't have long to live. He seems to accept it - or pretend to accept it...

How do you feel?

How a mother might feel when she realises that she may see her son die? Bury the one she brought into this world. To live to see that moment is something she doesn't want to do.

Thank you if you read to the end! I'm crying right now😭

[genericpuff]

Hello, i saw your post about Perse being a menace to the nymphs and I agree and the majority of what you said buuut

not to defend Persephone or anything, but didn't Minthe send her to the wrong place on purpose? I haven't read LO in a long time so i don' t remember the details but since she works there, she knows that THAT place is dangerous, and I'm not saying blackmail is ok but in perse's place i would be angry too, so while yes, the author makes Persephone and all the other characters treat nymphs poorly and that's one of the main reasons I dropped LO, that specific event (without taking in account the context of all, because yes in that moment Hades is basically cheating on Minthe with Persephone and she doesn't even felt guilty) but Minthe was so wrong for sending Perse there in the first place

English is not my first language so i apologize if i sound rude or if it's difficult to understand my idea.

But i really like this kind of posts because there are soo many scenes that i used to romanticize when i first read it while in school, like all those scenes with Tori and now i realize why LO is sooo messed up

So it's funny you bring that up because yes, Minthe did send her to the wrong place on purpose, however what DOESN'T get remembered often is that Minthe felt remorse over it.

And we see her feel remorse in this way on several occasions, including during the slap scene.

The fact that Minthe keeps getting pigeonholed into the "petty bitch" archetype by the narrative feels more of a consequence of Rachel trying to make the audience hate her no matter what (because she's the "other woman" in the H x P ship), and yet she shows more self-awareness and capability for growth than Hades and Persephone ever have, which is what makes her so endearing for the fanbase. She doesn't understand why she acts the way she does but she knows it's not okay. It's just that change is hard, especially when that change is dependent on you analyzing yourself and being willing to accept your faults and mistakes.

Unlike Hades and Persephone, who not only continuously act like brats to the people around them (especially Persephone as of late) but only take the kind of 'accountability' that makes them look good (ex. Therapy Speak), without showing any genuine remorse or willingness to change. It makes it feel like the nymphs are only mistreated because the narrative constantly gives them characterizations to justify their mistreatment.

Yes, Minthe's done terrible things, things that ultimately led to her downfall in a lot of ways - but I'm sure as shit more interested in where she has to go as a character than I am in Hades and Persephone, who have nowhere to go because they're clearly content with who they are.

Eughghgh.

[screamingatanemptyroom]

Please Fix the Story - pt 31 The Void Between - END

Last part. (Although I do plan for at least one or two side parts. One definitely from Liam's perspective. Maybe one from Adonis if I feel like it).

Guys, I started this story forever ago. Took a huge break when my life fell apart. I picked up the pieces, and never really thought I would get back to doing the things I love again. But here I am. Finishing this story. I'm so excited.

Please enjoy.

Masterpost linked here.

________________________________

“System!” I shouted into the white void, one hand still holding Liam’s tightly. “Stop hiding!”

THUD

Adonis had fallen to the ground, released from my power that had bound him. He stood up shakily, wiping a small amount of blood from the corner of his mouth. “Where did you take me?” He demanded angrily. “Where is this place?”

“This?” I looked around with a slight smile. “This place is the End.”

“The End?”

I thought for a moment. “Or perhaps the Beginning? It depends on your point of view, I suppose.” I gestured around at the blank whiteness around us “This is the void between, outside of the lower and higher realms, outside of stories. There is nothing here... nothing except memories.”

Liam stood protectively near me. “Where is the System?”

“It’s here. It’s watching. It just doesn’t want to admit that it lost. It views me as weak, pointless…”

Blue flames streaked out from out of sight towards my head. Sensing the magical attack, I dodged and waved a hand, countering it with my own power.

“YOU MUST ACCEPT YOUR FATE”  The bright blue words briefly appeared in the void, then disappeared just as fast, leaving nothing but an afterimage behind.

“BEL!” Liam had fallen when I dodged, and reached towards me, panicked.

“It’s okay. That was just a test.” With a grunt of pain, I stood back up again. “REALLY?” I spoke out again. “A sneak attack? Are you really that pathetic?” There was no answer, the System was hiding again.

“Hey!" Adonis had recovered from his shock, and resumed being a pest. “Bel! Tell me what’s going on, now!”

I didn’t even look in his direction. “No.”

“What?! What do you mean, no?!”

"I mean: 'No'." Still looking for any trace of the System, I cast a sympathetic glance towards Liam. “Poor guy.”

Liam caught on quick. “Don’t worry, Bel, I’ll help him!” He cleared his throat, turning towards the enraged hero. “’No’ is an English word used to give a negative response. In this case, the word ‘no’ would indicate a refusal to your request for more information. Similar sounding words, such as ‘know’ with a ‘k’ can sometimes be confused depending on the context clues, but that word is generally used to indicate knowledge rather than refusal. So if she had said ‘I know’ instead…”

“SHUT UP!” Adonis screamed, swinging at fist at Liam, who let him punch him in the chest without any apparent pain. Adonis instead withdrew his hand with a screech, one of his fingers clearly bent at a weird angle.

“Your chest breaks fingers?” I asked with a raised brow.

Liam pulled his collar down, showing off a coat of black scales with a grin. “Dragon skin is tough. Also known as the ‘idiot-tax’.”

During this exchange, I continued searching with my power, trying to feel the system’s presence. “Seems fair.”

“Why is it hiding?” Liam asked quietly.

“It doesn’t want to face the truth.” At my answer, Adonis stopped groaning and looked insulted.

“Why do you answer HIS questions and not MINE?”

“Because he’s my husband… and you’re annoying.” I turned to Liam. “Are you curious?”

Liam smiled at my question. “Very.”

“Then I’ll explain it to you as we go.” I looked around again, sensing that the System had hid itself. “It’s hiding within this space, and so I’ll need to force it out. Since it wants to hide the truth, I’ll show exactly that: the truth." 

My power swept around us, filling everything.

"It all started here. In this void.”

The world around us changed, showing infinite portals, each leading to a new world, glowing with various degrees of golden light.

“There are infinite stories, and therefore infinite lower realms.  Some are stable, filled with energy… some are unstable, collapsing, draining energy from the realms around it.” As I spoke, some of the weaker portals flickered and died. “Each time a world collapsed, the entirety of the lower realms was at risk, a collapse of a universe of worlds and people.”

The golden light of the portals coalesced, forming a vague being of bright blue light. “The System came into being. It's exact origin is unclear. Was it created, another product of the authors or gods beyond our existence that write the stories? Was it just a random event, too much energy organizing into a sentient being?” I stepped closer to the glowing blue figure, staring up at it. “It’s impossible to know. But I do know one thing:”

The figure peered into a portal as it flickered and disappeared. It stared at the empty space for a few moments before shrugging and moving on to the next. “The System isn’t human. It has no understanding of human emotions, motivations, or relationships. It can read the stories, it can see the unfulfilled wishes of the author, but it cannot truly understand why some stories worked and others collapsed.”

Adonis stared at the figure I showed them, a look of frustration and anger creeping across his face. Liam watched with curiosity. They both stayed silent, however, and the System stayed in hiding, so I continued the story.

“The system depends on the survival of the lower realms, but it could not figure out how to save the stories that were disappearing. So it looked for a human partner, someone who could help it figure out what to do.”

The world around us changed again, and we were standing on a college campus. It was a bright sunny day, with students milling about, chatting, laughing, carrying books. We stood in the midst of everything, unseen by the people around us, unable to touch or affect anything we could see. Adonis, recognizing the area, turned pale, trembling as he stood rooted in place. “No.” He whispered. “This is impossible. This isn’t real.”

I smiled at him, but it wasn’t a pleasant expression. “Of course it isn’t real. This is a memory of the System. No one can travel to this lower realm anymore. It’s destroyed… thanks to you.”

“NO.”

As I searched the memory around us, I could sense the memory... and the System... nearby. “Let’s go.” I grabbed Liam’s hand and ran forward, rushing through the crowds, following the lead that only I could feel. After a brief hesitation, Adonis ran after us.

“The system sensed that someone had broken free from the confines of a story.” I spoke as we moved. All around us there were college students milling about, talking laughing with carefree attitudes. “What had been stable, had become broken, and it was all because of a single individual.”

I pulled Liam to a stop in front of two people, studying both of the figures in the memory with interest.

One was a handsome young man with a playful grin and long hair pulled back with a cord. He was facing another young man, who looked extremely angry.

The other young man was Adonis.

As we looked back and forth between the Adonis in the memory and the one that had followed us through the void, the Adonis next to Liam and I stepped closer, staring at his doppelganger with a weary, contemptuous expression.

“She loves me!” The memory Adonis spoke out. “Stop getting in the way!”

“You know that isn’t right, Adler.” The young man answered with a sigh. “Just because you two grew up together, doesn’t give you ‘dibs’ on her. You two are friends. Ara is my girlfriend.”

Liam raised an eyebrow as we watched the scene around us play out. “Adler?”

“His real name.” I glanced over at Adonis, who looked away. “He changed it to Adonis after he left this lower realm.”

“He CHOSE Adonis?”

“He thought it sounded more heroic.”

“Poor guy.”

“Save your pity.” I pointed back to the memory around us, where Adonis continued to argue with the other college student. Eventually, a young woman walked up, giving a hug to the other man and eyeing Adonis warily.

“Bel…?” Liam sounded concerned and confused, and I didn’t’ blame him.

After all, the woman looked just like me.

It wasn’t exact. There was a bright cheery innocence that this girl carried around her. A naivete, as if she would  believe whatever someone told her. Nice, but gullible. She very much lacked my distrustful glares and heavy sarcasm. But the face, body, hair…. All of the outer features were the same.

“It’s not me.” I reassured Liam, who watched the girl with my appearance kiss the college student with a low disgruntled growl. “It’s Arabella. The heroine of this lower realm.”

Adonis stared intently at the woman, obsession in his eyes. “MY heroine.”

“Nope. Not yours. Because you weren’t the hero of your story, were you, Adonis?”

The argument between the three in the memory grew heated. Adonis… Adler… tried to grab Arabella’s hand, and she pulled away with a frustrated expression.

“You were the friend, the side character, the witness to the main romance of the story. But you were unwilling to play that role… to accept your fate.”

“IT WAS NOT MY FATE!” Adonis reached out, but his hand passed through the memory of Arabella. “I WAS THE HERO! I WAS THE ONE SHE WAS SUPPOSED TO LOVE!”

The Adonis in the memory had gone quiet. He reached into his coat, and pulled out a long knife, lunging forward, stabbing the young man and woman in front of him. Only when they were still on the ground, their bodies soaking in the blood pooling beneath them did he seem to recognize what he had done. He fell to his knees, screaming, as the world around his began to distort.

“You broke the story, killed the hero and heroine… and this caught the attention of the System.”

A glowing blue figure appeared in front of the blood-stained Adonis, words appearing around him.

"YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHANGE THE STORY."

I looked down at the dead body on the ground with the same face as me, letting out a quiet sigh. “The two of them made a deal. Adonis would be pulled out of the lower realm, become a higher being. He would help the System in fixing the broken lower realms.”

The Adonis in the memory considered for a brief moment, and nodded. As he and the System disappeared, the world they had left behind began to collapse.

“There’s always a cost, though. If you take someone out of a lower realm… the realm is destroyed as a result.” My eyes met Adonis’ as he watched the memory of the deal he made with a dispassionate gaze. All the emotion that had boiled over at the sight of Arabella had faded, and there was nothing, not even remorse. “You knew you were destroying the world if you left. And you did it anyways.”

“They did nothing for me.” His voice was quiet, but vitriol in it was clear. “I should have been the hero of that world… they didn’t deserve survival.”

“Just like Arabella deserved death for not loving you?” At my question his eyes flickered, but he quickly regained calm. “She didn’t die. After all, you’re here, aren’t you?”

“I’m not Arabella, Adonis. No matter the physical resemblance.” I smiled. “I’m something much more…”

Another blast of blue flames again came towards me. I pushed back with my own power, defending myself. My magic swept through from the direction the blast had came from, trying to strike back, but it had already disappeared once again.

“Oh you didn’t like that, did you? Are you mad enough to stop hiding, or should I keep talking?”

There was only silence in response. I chuckled grimly, continuing the story.

“Adonis was the one who thought of binding the lower realms to the higher realms. By having the heroes of the lower realms be connected to Adonis, by having him control them and their endings through these ties he called fate, he thought he could influence all of the stories at once, helping them reach a happy ending.” I paused. “How funny that the man who was chosen because he broke free of his fate, chose to bind everyone else even tighter.”

The portals showed up around us again, losing their glow and flickering out at a noticeable pace. “But it didn’t work. The lower realms were failing faster than ever. You contaminated all of the heroes with a part of you, they took on a part of your personality, your obsessive desire with being the center of the universe.”

I thought of all the heroes I had met in the lower realms, how they reacted with the story around them changed. Even kinder heroes like K’lliean in the elven world had shown signs… he almost cracked and tried to force me to be with him when he sensed me pulling away. They all had pieces of Adonis forced on them, tying them to an even worse fate then the broken stories once had.

“Out of desperation, Adonis suggested a new plan. It wasn’t enough to have a prototype ‘hero’ to bind everyone to. They needed a new prototype, a second higher level being.” I hesitated, seeing the realization and pain on Liam’s face but forcing myself to continue. “They needed a villain.”

The world around us changed again, and now we were in a beautiful green world with bright open skies. The System remained hidden, so I continued talking, hoping to goad it into showing itself once again.

“Adonis had always been a fan of fairy tales. Knights, princesses, and the evil monster that kidnapped her: the dragon.”

Dragons flew overhead with roars that shook the earth below. The world was filled with the mighty creatures, flying, fighting, sleeping. Simply existing in this beautiful realm. And right next to us was a large silver dragon, patiently teaching a smaller black one.

Liam stepped closer, tears running down his face. “Grandfather.” His hand passed through the larger form, his hand tightening into a fist.

“They searched though all of the lower realms with dragons, and within one found a young black coated dragon that they felt could be molded into what they needed.”  I continued to speak, watching Liam closely. “The System tried to offer a deal, promising power and domination over all the lower realms.”

A blue figure pulled the small dragon away, obviously trying to convince it of something. The young dragon shook his head in response.

 “But the dragon said no. He loved his world, his family. He didn’t want to leave, no matter what was offered to him.”

The dragon was enveloped in blue fiery light, disappearing with an inhuman screech of terror. The world around us, similar to Adonis’ world before it, crumpled into itself, fading away into nothing.

My voice dropped to a whisper. “The price of removing someone from the lower realms is always the same, whether they want to leave or not. The young dragon’s world… his family… was destroyed.” I reached out and hugged Liam, who was wracked with silent sobs as he watched his home realm disappear.

“I’m sorry.” I tightened my arms around him, feeling a deep pain within as he slowly composed himself. I was using this story to push the System, to make it angry enough to appear. But I had another motive as well. I wanted Liam to understand everything. To see this. He had the right to know the full truth.

The truth of what I was.

The picture around us faded, showing the young black dragon now in the Villain’s realm, surrounded by forest. He looked around, obviously lost and confused.  Words appeared in the sky before him.

YOU ARE THE VILLAIN.

The dragon shook his head no.

YOU MUST ACCEPT YOUR FATE.

A portal appeared and chains shot out, binding the dragon and dragging it into a lower realm. The sight was heartrendingly familiar, and I had to take a deep breath, steadying myself to continue.

“They tried to mold the dragon into the villain they needed. The plan was to force the dragon into multiple realms, placing him as the villain of the story. If he refused to play his part? The realm would be destroyed. The dragon was too kind hearted, and eventually became resigned to sacrificing himself, story after story, realm after realm. Saving the realms but losing himself. The system tied the dragon to the villains of the lower realms, in the bonds of fate, but if anything, that made things even worse.”

The portals in the void reappeared, now most of them becoming unstable and flickering, even previously brightly glowing ones were slowly becoming dim.

“Your plans had brought this whole universe to the brink of destruction, and still Adonis refused to believe that his strategy was wrong. It’s just that the prototype story… the higher realm story… was incomplete.”

I turned towards Adonis, who was glaring at me with unbridled rage. “The knight, the dragon… and now you needed the princess. You were a hero missing your heroine. And so, you told the System to bring you your heroine.”

“Don’t…” Adonis finally spoke up again, but the word was forced out between clenched teeth.

“What? Don’t tell the truth?” I shook my head. “It’s not your secret to hide. It’s my truth to tell.”

“Stop!” He rushed forward, but my dark power wrapped around him again, holding him in place.

“Shush. I’m trying to explain my mysterious origins here.” I sat him down on the ground with my magic, and turned to Liam. I felt nervous, a desperation welling up within me. I wondered as I started to speak again if this is how he felt when I found out he was a dragon. It turned out he didn’t need to worry.

I wasn’t human either.

“Adonis would only accept one heroine.”

“Arabella.” Liam added, watching me carefully.

“Exactly. But that left the system with a problem. Arabella was dead. Even if she survived the stabbing, the entire lower realm had been destroyed by bringing Adonis out. It tried to convince him, but he grew only more desperate. He couldn’t accept the truth.”

I paused, taking a deep breath. “So the system did the only thing it could: it tried to make a new Arabella.”

“But that means…” Liam looked confused, but as realization started to dawn, I ran forward and tackled him.

“GET DOWN!”

The entire space imploded. There was nothing but blue fire, drowning everything. There was no noise, no heat. There was only magic destructive power. It lasted for what seemed like an eternity, and then slowly faded.

I lifted my head. An enormous being was wrapped around me, protecting me. Liam, who had shifted to his dragon form, continued to shield me, his dark blue eyes looking over me carefully, filled with concern, checking for injuries. I withdrew the magic I had used to protect us both, but I still saw a few burned spots in his scales here and there. Touching his scales with a regretful expression, I whispered. “Sorry.”

I had been goading the system, waiting for it to make its move, but as I told Liam the truth, my attention had shifted for a short moment. And in that moment, the System who had been biding its time, made its move.

“As long as you are safe.” Liam’s reply made me smile. We stared at each other for a few moments, both happy the other was okay.

“WHY DIDN’T YOU DESTROY HIM?!” Adonis’ voice destroyed the special moment. At least he's consistently annoying.

Liam rolled his eyes, the expression a bit strange on a dragon. “How did he survive the fire?” He asked me.

I thought it over, and winced. “My bad, my power was already wrapped around him to hold him down when the System attacked… I must have accidentally protected him.”

“It’s okay, we all make mistakes.” Liam nodded solemnly and comforted me.

“Yeah, maybe next time he’ll get burned to a crisp.”

“You know… I am a dragon… I could help us achieve that goal.”

“Tempting…” I started to respond, but Adonis started shouting again.

“System! Now’s your chance! Destroy the monster!” He pointed at Liam, his face triumphant as he commanded him. “And then we can fix Arabella, and start over with a new villain. We will make the story right, correct everything that is wrong, and retie the strings of Fate to save the universe!”

“…” There was something new that had joined us in this space between realms. A vaguely human shaped being made of blue flames. As it spoke, its voice was neither young or old, soft or deep, it was deeply disturbingly inhuman. The words it spoke appeared in front of us, scrawled across the sky, a reminder of its power.

“YOU MUST ACCEPT YOUR FATE.”

“System! Destroy it!” Adonis screamed impatiently.

“…” There was no response.

“It can’t.” I finally spoke up, calmly. “It doesn’t want to risk attacking Liam anymore. It had its only chance with that sneak attack and it failed. Facing me head on… there’s no way it can win easily.”

“I don’t understand. The System… it creates fate… it’s a god!”

“You are the one that doesn’t understand. I know what the System is, Adonis, much better than you do." I took a deep breath.

"After all… I’m a part of it.”

In the silence that followed I heard the soft sound of Liam’s sigh as understanding dawned. My heart beat nervously, but I continued to explain.

“The system couldn’t resurrect Arabella, so it split off some of its own power, a new entity that remained only with a limited connection. It used Adonis’ memories of Arabella as a template, but it could never be exact. From the moment of its creation, the created being would grow and change based on new experiences, meetings… to become something new, beyond the confines of what others wanted.”

“YOU WERE AN ERROR.” The system’s inhuman voice was cold.

“I was the only effective thing you’ve ever done to save the lower realms.” Was my even colder response.  

“No… you’re Arabella.” Adonis was stuttering, staring at me with horror.

“You always knew I wasn’t her, Adonis." I sighed. "The only thing I can thank you for was that when the system used your memories of a template, it used data, rather than your perception of her. Rather than a perfect heroine deeply in love with you, it created a young woman with a thirst for adventure and learning… and no romantic interest in you whatsoever.”

The system stepped closer, and Liam’s wings spread out widely, protectively.

“THE DEAL IS INVALID. YOU MUST ACCEPT YOUR FATE.”

“The deal is already done, System. You lost.” I waved my hand, and my power formed into the shape of a sword. It always was my preferred weapon. “If you won’t concede that I won willingly… Then I’ll make you by force.”

As I circled closer, the System stood still, confident. “YOU CANNOT KILL ME. YOU ARE ME!”

I smiled. “That’s where you’re wrong.”

My sword swung, and a limb fell to the ground, disintegrating into blue flame. I held my blade at its neck and it froze.

“I WAS you. But the deals we made changed everything.”

The world around us changed again. The System buzzed with energy, trying to fight it, but I pushed through.

It was time to finish the story.

Liam continued to stand guard, watching Adonis and the System carefully. As my power took over, the world I was showing became clear:

It was me. I was in the villain world, laying on the ground pale and sweating. I was dying.

“After I was created, I only tried to save the lower realms one by one. I refused to listen to Adonis' plans. In his frustration, he tossed me into the villain realm to force me to submit. It was his way of continuing the prototype story. The dragon keeping the princess captive. But Adonis and the System didn’t count on one thing:"

In the vision I showed, Liam in his human form knelt beside me, his expression despairing as he gently wiped the sweat from my forehead. I held his hand, my eyes focused on him and no one else. Adonis stood nearby, ignored by both of us in the memory, watching with a hateful, weary expression.

“I decided I would rather die in the villain realm, die by my husband’s side, rather than submit to the horrible fate you and the System had devised.”

The System in the memory appeared next to human Liam, pushing him aside, and approaching the dying Bel. Liam screamed with fear and rage, trying to return to his dragon form, but was frozen into place half-transformed.

“YOU CANNOT DIE.” The system’s inhuman voice was quiet, but deafening at the same time.

The memory Bel forced a smile. “Better dead and free than trapped by your chains.”

“I CANNOT LET YOU DIE. IT WOULD DESTROY ME, DESTROY EVERYTHING. BUT YOU REFUSE TO LIVE… WE ARE AT AN IMPASSE.”

“Then how about we make a wager?” The weakness in her voice couldn’t hide the determination of her words.

I looked at the System, still held in place at the point of my sword. “So, we made a deal. I would travel the realms, save them, gather the energy from each of the recovered worlds.”

In the memory, blocks of text appeared in front of the dying Bel. She read through the deal with a frown. I watched the vision, shaking my head in frustration.

“The stakes were clear. If I could save enough worlds… could build enough power, separate from the System, I would be able to break free from the ending of this prototype story. To write my own fate. But… if I failed even one… the System would take all the energy I gathered, and I would be forced to submit to the fate designed to me. To be a mindless, soulless heroine, playing her role and nothing else.”

“Foolish.” Adonis was standing, glaring at me with blood shot eyes. Liam growled in response, placing his enormous form between us, but Adonis ignored him, continuing to speak. “You just had to agree to be a heroine, and we could have saved everyone together. Instead, you risked everything, left an unstable universe to try to save it world by world.”

“I chose to remain free. To not enslave these worlds to fate.” The System sensed my distraction and tried to strike, and so I pressed my sword of magic forward, dripping flames from the cut in its shapeless neck.

“The deal was designed for me to fail.” Again the picture around us changed. It was still me, but in many different forms. A student. An assassin. An elf. World after world, flipping faster and faster until it was a visual blur.  “You chose miserable roles for me.  I had no memories, no knowledge of the story except what was provided for me. I was alone… or I was supposed to be.”

Another change. Now the System in the memory was talking with Liam. As he watched the memory, Liam beside me shook his head, as if trying to clear it.  

“Liam had nothing the system wanted but his status as a villain. If I lost, he would play the perfect villain. No shortcuts, no mercy for the weak…become a puppet for the system. But the system wanted more.”

Text appeared in front of Liam in the memory. As the nature of the deal became clear, the real Liam beside me let out a moan.

“A sacrifice.” His voice was filled with pain, barely audible. “Every lower realm I had saved in the past by playing my role. How many worlds would that be? Countless lives. Innocents.”

“The System would absorb them for energy if we lost.”

“It asked for my soul. Saving those worlds by letting myself be defeated or killed in those realms was all that I could cling to when I was despairing. If I sacrificed them… “ He paused, his dragon eyes showing despair. “It wouldn’t have to brainwash me to become a villain. I would have already taken that step myself.”

“Liam would be given the chance to follow me. His memories wiped each time. He would have no idea who I was or how to help me. He would as always be the villain in the story. A bad deal.” The Liam in the memory agreed, and disappeared. “ I glanced at Liam beside me. “But you took it anyways, desperate to help me, to stay by my side. Even though you would more likely end up a mindless, soulless slave.”

“I would never abandon you, Bel. Not if there was any chance I could help you.”

"You did." I reassured him. "I had nearly given into despair by the time you joined me. You gave me purpose, helped me forward. I would have been lost, along with everything else." I glanced over at Adonis who was shaking in rage.

“Adonis made a deal too, of course, but much different from ours. He wanted to follow, but wanted his memories, wanted to know the full story. The System only allowed him limited access, into a few worlds. It worried that if Adonis followed me everywhere I would be motivated to resist longer, as I had in the higher realms before.”

Adonis in the memory accepted a deal, and disappeared as well. There was only the system left.

“You thought I would give up, or that I would fail to fix a world. I was supposed to accept my fate. Instead, I refused. I resisted. I fixed every single world I went to. I won. Which brought us back to the higher realm.”

“NO.” The system beside me pushed back with all of its power, erasing the memory I had shown around us. I tried my best to shield Liam and I, but as I concentrated on my own dark magic, I heard someone running up behind me.

“You ruined everything!” Adonis had a knife, trying to slash at my back as he drew closer. The System kept attacking, forcing all of my attention on it. I was helpless to stop the attack from the hero.

Fortunately I wasn't alone.

A dragon tail swung out, knocking Adonis a fair distance where he fell to the ground with a crunch. He lay still, his hand grabbing at the hilt of his knife where it protruded from his side after he landed on it.

“How…?” He touched the blood spilling from the wound, shocked.

“You brought it on yourself.” Liam growled. “Also, why is your only response to rejection stabbing? You seriously need better coping mechanisms.”

I laughed, but couldn’t lose focus on the battle at hand. I turned to the system, who had stopped attacking “Now that this story is done, all bets are complete.” I waved a hand, a wave of dark power covering the void around us.

Liam’s eyes blinked, and then cleared, a sense of timelessness within them. He rubbed his head against me. “Bel. You did it.”

I smiled.  “Thanks to you.”

Adonis had changed as well. His face was pale, then red with anger, then pale again as he continued to lose blood from his side. “You cheated, System! You promised I would keep my memories! How did…”

“It wasn’t the system, Adonis.” I interrupted. “This last story, us repeating the Higher Realm… it was me. I gained power because I wanted a different ending to OUR story, and this is the ending I chose. Not one with me dying in the villain realm, with Liam and I accepting a terrible deal in a desperate attempt to save one another. A better ending.”

Adonis struggled to his feet, sneering. “So what? THIS is it? Your so-called happy ending? You become a villainess instead of a heroine and get to stay in the villain realm with that monster? Big deal.” He spat on the ground, the spit mixed with blood from the wounds on his mouth. “The System and I will find a real heroine. Not a FAKE one like you. We’ll restart the story, and fate will save us all, with the villain and villainess being destroyed!”

I laughed. A true, villainess cackle. It echoed in the vast emptiness of the Void, seeming to go on for ages.

“Why are you laughing?”

“Who told you my goal was to be the villainess?”

The System began flickering, like a candle going out.

“YOU MUST ACCEPT…”

“My goal was to be the new System.” I swung the sword in my hand, and the already fading system fell to pieces. “To destroy fate itself.”

The last of the blue flames fizzled out with a soft sound. If an inhuman machine-like existence could sigh with relief, I would have sworn that is what I heard. The System was gone.

There was only me left.

Adonis screamed at my actions. “WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?”

“I gained enough power in my travels to be fully independent of the System. That is why it feared me. Why it tried to destroy me in the end. But now its gone. As is your foolish fate.”

“Every realm will be destroyed! Without a prototype… without a guide… all of those worlds will be lost!”

“No Adonis.” I stepped closer to him, and he shuddered in fear at the power I wielded, moving backwards. “Those worlds will be free. Some strong, some broken and needing help. But I’d rather spend the rest of my existence helping worlds one by one then ever attempting what you and the System tried to do.”

“It’s impossible to save them all!” He hissed, his voice cracking with pain and terror.

“Doesn’t mean I won’t keep trying.” I shrugged, looking over at Liam. “I hope you don’t mind, dear. He’s not wrong when he says it’s an impossible task.”

“Traveling with you to different realms for all eternity? How horrible for me.” Liam laughed. “Now there’s fate I can get behind.”

I turned back to Adonis. “You see… he’s fine with it.”

“I’ll have to make a sling to carry future eggs if we’re always going to be traveling…” Liam muttered to himself. I ignored him, continuing to stare at the former hero.

“So what now, Bel?” He scowled. “Are you going to kill me? Torture me? Your villainous plans don’t scare me!”

“I don’t have to do any of that, Adonis… or should I say Adler?” A villain laugh sounded out again. “You have much to answer for: How many have you killed in your quest to be a ‘hero’? How many have lives have you destroyed in your desire to impose fate on the lower realms?" He shook his head, trying to deny my words, but it was too late.

"Killing you? No. I have a much better ‘fate’ in store for you:” Reaching out, my dark power curled around him, healing his wound from his side and lifting him up in the air

“You will be banished to a lower realm. To live out your days as an insignificant side character.”

His eyes widened with shock. “NO! YOU CAN’T!!!”

“By day, you will remember nothing… but every night, your memories of the higher realms will be returned to you, just enough so you can always live in regret for what you have done.”

“NO!”

I looked at the man I had once thought of as a friend.

“You always told me to accept my fate. Well now, you must accept YOUR fate, Adonis. Goodbye.” My power covered him, and he disappeared, forever.

Only Liam and I were left.

“Soo…” I looked up at the dragon. “No issues with me being a multidimensional being, whose origin comes from a homicidal fate-obsessed system?”

Liam’s serpentine face grinned, and with a brief covering of smoke he turned back into a human. “No problems here!” He reached out and hugged me. “So what now? We travel the lower realms? Save worlds?”

“Yeah, but Liam…”

“So many different weddings to plan…” He rested his chin on the top of my head. “I wonder if we can visit old worlds? I’d love to let the Blood Wolves celebrate with us.”

“I think that could be arranged… Liam…”

“Yes, Bel.” his deep blue eyes shining with joy as they met my own.

“Can you put on clothes, first?”

He looked down at his naked human form, and then back up at me, hugging me tighter. “Sorry, I don’t have extra clothes in the void.”

I couldn’t help but laugh. “Where did my shy and modest dragon go?”

“He remembers at least four different weddings we’ve had in different worlds.” His smile widened. “Now that we’re finally alone, no spying system, or stalking heroes… I feel like we have very important things to discuss.”

I raised an eyebrow. “Like dragon eggs?”

“Bel!” He gave me a fake shocked expression. “I was going to discuss the weather! But now that you’ve brought it up…”

I laughed again at the evil villain dragon. The villainous minion. The support spouse. My husband the dragon.

“Sure, Liam. Then when we’re ready… we’ll go travel the realms. Visit some old friends. Save some worlds.”

No more heroes.

No more villains.

No more Fate.

Just us.

________________________________

In a lower realm…

“Are you ready?” Adam, his tall form dressed up in a fancy suit, held out a hand towards me. He didn't look too different to how he had seemed in high school, his features more mature, his eyes wiser. The look of brotherly affection hadn't changed at all, however.

“Of course!” I grinned and took his hand, looking at his face. “Are you crying?”

“What? No!” He wiped his eyes quickly. “Just shocked at how much my little sister has grown up! Seems like yesterday you were a goofy highschooler chasing that bozo Jake around."

“You grew up too.”  I smiled. “When is Jessica due?”

His expression grew soft. “Just 2 more months. I told her she should take time off, but she likes running the café. Says people watching is her pleasure in life." He glanced back at me. “Speaking of which, are they going to hire a substitute to teach calculus while you’re gone?”

“They’re going to have to. I’m not spending my honeymoon teaching math, that’s for sure.”

“I can’t believe you became a teacher… and a calculus teacher of all things… I thought you hated it.”

“I’m somewhat of an expert on the topic. Plus, I feel the need to spread the… joy… of learning calculus to others.”

“I feel sorry for your students.” he shuddered. "At least you don't spray them."

“Nope, that's only for brother behavior modification.” I laughed out loud, and Adam shook his head at my signature villainess sound.

“Good thing Liam likes your craziness.”

I shrugged. “He wouldn’t have me be any other way.”

We walked forward, stepping up to the beginning of the aisle. I grabbed the white skirt of my wedding gown in one hand, holding Adam’s hand with my other, as the wedding march played.

At the front of the church, Liam, dressed in a suit and looking slightly nervous waited. As I moved towards him, our eyes met. His dark blue eyes, the same in every world, lit up with joy, despite the countless weddings we’ve had before.

Different realms. Different bodies. The same souls. The same love.

Well… not everything was the same.

Wait until he finds out about my surprise. I laughed silently. The egg sling is finally going to be of use.

I took Liam's outstretched hand, and we spoke our vows once more, surrounded by our friends and family of this realm.

Promising to stay by each other’s side.

Forever.

[zeevoidlight]

I think Vegeta was a virgin up until he met Bulma.

I know, what a freaking way to start an argument but blame reddit for asking and leading me to a trail of autism thoughts, and I will also talk about Vegeta's attraction to Bulma and viceversa when they first met. Like, how tho. Albeit from a demisexual perspective (or asexual, idk anymore really). (I saw the latin dub but as I have heard it is very similar to the japanese version but I'll reference the japanese one if i found footage of it).

/////

Some might believe that because of his attitude, his raw power, his Saiyan heritage, his status as conqueror of planets, genocidal maniac, sociopath extraordinare, his military background and his ruthlessness and uncaring nature, Vegeta was raping people left and right, or that he has always been very sexually active, or at least had some experience regarding the matter.

But be honest, he was too dense with everything from his childhood traumas and his vengeance against Frieza to care about having sex, or having a relationship with anyone in any capacity.

Also he is too proud and values his Saiyan heritage too much to give anyone he didn't deem worthy the privilege to have sex with him, let alone risk the possibility of an offspring. At least that's how I see Vegeta being pre Namek and pre dying against Frieza having to confront and accept by force an overwhelming amount of feelings on a rollercoaster for the first time in years. Dude didn't even thought two times to kill Nappa and let Raditz rot instead of reviving him as the last remainings of his people, that's how dense he was prior. He was so proud that he didn't mind to be the only Saiyan left alive and probably preferred it that way. Nappa that one time suggested to him that they could revive the Saiyan race by mixing with earthlings and Nappa was ready to pound (consensual or not) and Vegeta is like "nah, are you crazy? I wouldn't like to have a child being stronger than me". Dude probably had the opportunity to do so some other times but rejected it, he doesn't sound interested at all, first thinking on other things than sex. Added to that the detail that Toriyama was asked and said that Saiyans basically only get together sexually for the purpose of reproduction, is not a necessity for the most part in the same way it is for humans.

Of course he wasn't oblivious to it like Goku though and was well aware because he's not stupid. Outside of the English dub he notices Bulma on Namek and even refers to her as gorgeous, or pretty earthling woman. So I guess he still had a sexual notion but in other ways. He was not innocent of mind is what I'm saying. Like, he must have known what flipping the bird means. Is probably not that he didn't knew what sex was and desired it at some point or joked about it like I guess they'd do in Frieza's army but he was just not interested on acting on it for real at that time.

But then, after Frieza died and everything that happened after his disaster visit to Earth and Namek, after loosing literally everything and having no purpose anymore other than wait and find Goku to best him, and after having realized more of himself in vulnerable ways trying to find some sense of normality in who he perceived he was, here comes Bulma all confident, infatuated and aggressive with him, because of course she like the bad boys (and Vegeta is actually canonically deemed as handsome), and because Vegeta let his guard down for one second and let Bulma be Bulma while he literally couldn't do anything but go along (I suppose Piccoro was the only one that could have fight him if he tried anything). And he already found her attractive too in a way, not only that but she was probably the first woman that wasn't scared of him and even challenged him, treating him as an equal and as just another person, flirting with him openly, living with her and her family as a guest which is a completely different context to what he had been doing to survive his medium. Like, no one really talks about it but he spent 6 months! with her, her family, and like 50 namekians all living together before asking for Goku to "revive", and that time of waiting calmed him down a great deal already.

His interactions with Bulma

So just so happens that now he can think on other things that aren't killing Frieza and escaping his rulership. He had to learn this new types of interactions and how to deal with them in his own way, and that includes how to approach someone that he felt attracted to. Who knows if he had other people he felt that attraction towards, probably, but Bulma is the one that basically said "yeah, I'm down if you want".

The fact that he calls her "vulgar" when she first flirted with him says a lot of how he would not engage with just anyone because of his pride as a prince and a Saiyan, and how she probably was the first to even flirt with him openly. How he says she is "loud" and called her "woman" also says that he was more likely annoyed by the idea of women as gender like it often happens, belittling them and all. While on the other hand Bulma constantly challenged him on it once they got to Earth, forcing him to address the topic as we see several times, being strong against him. Like (again I'm going with the Latin version since I've heard is more accurate to the japanese version), Bulma says to him "and what about you, small one", and he's like "what?!... She called me small one?..." (in japanese she just calls him Vegeta-kun, like a pet name), he was not willing to dignify the provocation huffing to Bulma's invitation after but didn't menace her nor got aggressive or sarcastic like he would with someone else. But then she said "I'm going to give you a lot of food. Bet you eat as much as Goku, am I wrong? haha!... But I'm not going to allow you fall in love with me even if you find me very attractive", and is in this moment where you can see Vegeta's wtf face entering panic mode resorting to insult her under his breath as if she could see through him. Is right here where you see that he doesn't really know how to react to someone flirting and is debating between bursting in anger or run away but just ends up paralyzed because his ego won't let him move. (in japanese he reacts by muttering "what a vulgar woman! and how loud she is (being)!")

Then they go to Bulma's house and Vegeta just tags along. It seems that going through Namek with the earthlings, helping each other and cooperating like his life depended on it was an experience for a lifetime. My man can't seem to get a rest from one wft after the other since he arrived to Earth because the next thing that happens is that Bulma's mother comes to him faster than light startling him and says "[]...I imagine you must be Bulma's boyfriend. You ARE charming. And it looks like you are trendy". And the only thing he can muster to reply back is "t-trendy?" (I find it funny that that's what he reacted to and not to being called Bulma's boyfriend XD)

Vegeta's disinterest and rejection is part of why I think Bulma was interested on him. Because the interactions Bulma has had with men in general throughout the entirety of the series have been... very poor to say the least. Men want take advantage of Bulma in one way or another but more often than not sexually (I mean just being in Roshi's general vicinity is more than enough for anyone), or they see her as a "thing" for themselves, a trophy. (this one bellow was so terribly stressful, my god...)

And Bulma's approach to men is a similar as well because she is clearly very superficial too and that has remained a constant since day one. (jesus, bulma)

And Vegeta wasn't interested on taking her like that, on the contrary he pushed her away despite being interested (which I bet Bulma knew or at least expected because of her own ego), and also he had greater objectives he wanted to pursue. Focused (on surpassing Goku...), determined, and that was the difference. He doesn't seem like the type of guy that would try to get an opportunity to peek through the shower window seeking to get a glimpse of her like we have seen others do (although, Bulma did saw him through the shower doors), or disrespect her in any physical way. Far from it, his reactions with her are getting all nervous, speechless, flustered, he follows her (because in a way he does respect her character and leadership), aggressively rejecting her at the same time (trying to negate his feelings to go back to the status quo), calling her names, and Bulma isn't taking none of that because she doesn't believe that bs he's spouting and she knows he likes her (like, who wouldn't, as she probably tells herself), even plays with it sarcastically and either brushes it off or dares him to say it again. And I can see why is she so insistent too, because she also likes him.

He lets her get close to him but cautiously (the comparison to a stray cat is not too farfetched). He knows what Bulma wants but just now he has found someone that confronts him about it without fear or shame, he has now the mental space to think about it and needs to respond to it somehow, he is interested back too, he IS aroused by her as well. When he arrives to Bulma's house from his search in space and Yamcha and him are al tense with each other, Bulma arrives and says all calmly "Calm down, boys. Why don't you let him take a shower first?", she touches him and says "C'mon. You have to take a shower because you are VERY dirty" *finger movent, "Come. It's this way". That flinch he does when she touches him while going into fight or flight mode again, and the famous sexy finger movement on Bulma's part that completely seeks to throw him off and serve as a sexual invitation that he quietly accepts (even before she yells at him to stop gawking and not let a damiselle wait) by being passive and following her lead to the surprise of everyone in the scene.

I mean, I'm not the most versed person regarding this (as you can probably see) but It's happened to me where someone gives me something they have to hand me, and they let their hand stay a little longer than usual, or unnecessarily caress your palm with their fingers or nails with the intention for you to notice the unusual movement and tingly sensation as a way of flirting and invite you to sexy time. So I see this the first time and i'm like "Bulma?... ~what is this?~ I see your game" while remembering the first time someone did that to me so clearly. People think that because it's some people's first time you'll be all awkward and won't know how to be sexy too, specially being an older virgin person which would be Vegeta's case, but nah, you just gotta be confident and say "fuck it, I want this too and will give you a good time as well". It is how I picture Vegeta, ultimately knowing his value (also ultimately accepting something for himself after loosing everything on Namek) and enjoying himself as well (like, "serving himself with the bigger spoon" as they say) once they got there when he had to take a decision and answer Bulma's provocations.

(Also, I never totally understood why Bulma's mom was spilling the tea in the background at that moment but I suspected it was because it meant to signify Vegeta and Bulma were "cooking" and very into each other, and not just her being careless and aloof tho using that as a way to convey it).

Every time they in a scene she's measuring him with every interaction they have from the moment they got back to Earth onward, to see how far he's willing to allow her go, and hitting him with another wtf reaction every now and then to trow him off. Even going as far as put him in ridiculous and assert HER dominance. Because is not that he couldn't have just blasted everyone away with every step but little by little both were forming a connection. The scene of the pink shirt, after Vegeta gets offended by the style she says "If you don't want them you can walk around nude"... D: (his pikachu face was better than mine though, and then he says "damn, she's very rude"). I mean... is there anything more clear than that.

And then she sees him and says "You really look good like that...". Not only that but when Vegeta senses Frieza arriving he gets mad, insults Yamcha for doubting his ability to sense Frieza's chi, they're about to fight each other and Bulma is cooking some meat and is like "Vegeta, if you want to use the sauce I have it here", and everyone, specially Vegeta, is visibly confused and he doesn't know how to respond, the scene is left unanswered. But Bulma is pushing to see if Vegeta can be gentle and mannered.

(side note: Trunks says that after his arrival Yamcha was going to be unfaithful to Bulma but no man, That's what future Bulma told him but is more likely that it was her the one that left him for Vegeta that day, way before Trunks arrived. Even on Namek she already was over him, thinking of Goku and how she lost her train with him, then with Zarbon, and finally Vegeta (she also had a picture of Yamcha in her little camp in Namek full of darts to his face, so...). Yamcha never really had Bulma, and he didn't do much to get her back either or change. Truth is Bulma is the crazy one). And then when Frieza arrives to Earth Bulma arrives at the scene too and explains that since she couldn't see Frieza in Namek she wanted to see him here to see how strong he really was, and Vegeta says "not only she's rude but aggressive/daring too..." In this very soft thoughtful tone and talking to himself, like... C'mon dude! Accept that you like her!

And then then! when everyone is going towards Frieza's ship, Bulma is the one who yells "Wait, Vegeta! take me with you! Remember who hosts you!" (is that how you say it? dar alguien hospedaje?). Yamcha is completely out of her picture.

We see the next time the most obvious episode where the love tones are more present, Vegeta's training montage after the news of the androids, and his accident with the gravity chamber, but by then it was just confirmation of all the signs from before. So when we see Bulma with baby Trunks it doesn't really come out of nowhere and you understand how and why.

While I find Super's tsundere Vegeta in some instances fun to watch, more with him and Goku to be honest, but I don't think Z Vegeta was taking it in such a juvenile way, he's more adult and mature still about the situation, as mature as someone calling a girl "woman" to assert dominance that is. The flirting "dance" towards their sexual encounter is more silent and elegant, just like two adults would do so. He wants to get closer but the only thing the dude has known his entire life is fighting and being on offense mode all the time while at the same time having to hide. Their dynamic is quite interesting and quite amazing, not for nothing they are considered to be one of if not the best couple in anime, and trying to unravel how it all started is really fun.

But yeah, As I see it and if we could compare Vegeta's sexuality to something from real life he, as most saiyans, was probably demi-sexual (yay), since it's said that Saiyan's don't understand romance and they likely only had sex to reproduce. They didn't had the concept of family outside of the royal family. And that's why also Vegeta is one of the few saiyans that later could develop an understanding of family and being in a relationship in a way other saiyans don't, including Goku.

So yeah, that's my terminally online post of the day. Nothing but Dragon ball and Vegeta on my mind lately.

I would like to get into analyzing Goku and Vegeta's sexuality soon too. It's so interesting as well because is not traditional.

[thesecretbits]

Chan went on Bubble, told people that he makes his own decisions, his own rules. People immediately get mad that he's defending the company and say he's lying.

And this is the reason why he's taken a break from Chan's Room. Because some of you people are insufferable no matter what he says or does. You talk about how open he is with the fandom, but when he gets on Bubble to defend himself (not the company) and the decisions he makes because the fans insist on treating him like a child who is completely controlled by the company when he has told the fandom more than once how much input and say in SKZ as an entity he and the boys have in the things they do.

He said in Bubble months ago that he was not doing Chan's Room for the foreseeable future because they are busy. And they have been, flying from one country to the next for performances, concerts, and festivals, while still recording music for the albums they keep putting out. Fans complain about it daily. You saw a ten second video clip. What was said was in answer to a question that I did not hear in any video clip is saw, was not an official statement, and lacked context. Yes, maybe the company should have put out a statement saying that Chan's Room is on hiatus until further notice once a couple of weeks became a couple of months, but Chan did tell you that and nothing he said about the reason he wasn't doing it is untrue.

You say the company isn't protecting him right now, but what you can't accept is that the company is protecting Chan, from the fans and all the backlash that ensued every time he did Chan's Room.

Every time he came on live, he had to wade through a slew of nasty, inappropriate comments. Fans would take clips of what he said, post them on the internet, he would get hate from antis, and then more people would show up in his comments telling him to off himself or call him vile, disgusting things. There were so many comments that were high key sexual harassment, a lot of them from his own fans. Fans would trauma dump on him, constantly tell him to speak English, constantly complain about him going live too late and how he should be sleeping as if he isn't a grown adult man, and bombard him with requests for other members to join him. He had to start only reading comments from the fan club community to try to weed out the sheer number of inappropriate ones, but people were mad about that because Bubble community is not open to everyone.

Chan's Room might be important to him, I'm not saying it isn't, but doing it every week and then having to watch and then deal with the fallout the next day must have been mentally exhausting. Some of the fans couldn't even chill out when his friend died, and he was obviously sad but still doing lives.

What about any of that says that Chan's Room is still a safe space for Chan? Why are we surprised that he's decided to take a break from that? Him wanting to connect with the fans the way he did when he was doing his lives does not negate the fact that doing so is mentally taxing.

Telling the fans that he makes his own decisions is not defending the company. It's defending himself. People telling the fandom to look inward and take some accountability for its actions is not defending the company. No one is defending the company. We're telling you that what you've been doing, something Chan has explicitly said does not help, and how you've responded to something that, so far, has not been officially stated is wrong. Stop mass emailing, stop sending trucks, stop being obnoxious under JYPE posts on social media. You just give antis even more fodder against the boys, and make the entire fandom look childish to everyone who knows Stray Kids and/or works with them.

Some of you fans really need to take a step back and reevaluate. Because some of you really take this parasocial relationship a little too seriously and use no critical thinking skills to navigate it.

[poppystheories]

The official English of Lavi's scene is...probably not very good, from what I can tell. Which is understandable, this whole scene is tough. The official and fan translations say completely opposite things at several points, and I'm not sure which of them get it right.

So instead of getting too caught up on the exact wording of each translation, we're gonna go with vibes and context and stuff.

There's a big focus on how the Bookmen aren't supposed to give their heart, aka become personally invested, to anything, and how pointing this out hurts Lavi. Dream!Junior says these plain old facts like they'll make Lavi feel sorry for himself, and they do.

This scene has been analyzed by plenty of people before, but what I take from this dialogue is: Lavi actually isn't happy being a Bookman, huh? He is miserable and pities himself this lifestyle he was raised in; just laying out the reality of how he's supposed to live is enough to hurt him. He recognizes how empty and lonely and condescending the whole Bookman philosophy is, but can only say "I know...!". He actively thinks this whole deal sucks ass and still accepts it, and can't imagine living any other way.

Does Lavi know the previous Junior bowed out? Or rather, gave his "heart" away? Does he even realize that's an option?

Meanwhile, Allen's fight also involves the matter of the heart, but for him, rather than his heart being his weakness, it's undoubtedly his strength!

Lavi and Allen make for good foils. Neither of them have a "real" name, or home, and both hide behind constructed personas to keep the world at a distance, but on the inside they're completely different. Allen's identity was stolen from him, while Lavi threw his away. Both of their masters have ties to the 14th and know far more about the past and the war than they share with their students.

This post has been sitting in my queue for about two months and previously read:

"Considering Bookman Juniors are named after the record they're recording, and that the previous and current Juniors are working on the same record of the Holy War, just from opposite sides, it's likely the previous Junior's name was also "Lavi" just like the previous Allen's name was "Allen". "

Which is now completely confirmed.

There's a matching set of each of our protagonists in both past and future. Just like there was a past "Lavi" and past "Allen", there was a past Kanda too. Essentially, every character in DGM has a "past" counterpart, whether an actual version of themselves or a narrative substitute, ie the previous generation of Noah and the current, or Anita and her mother. Of our four major characters so far, only the Lenalee analog for the past is still missing.

This is also one of the reasons I thought for so many years that the previous Bookman Jr and Past!Allen couldn't possibly be the same person, but until this year, if I pointed that out any DGM reader interested in theories would have laughed me right out the door...

[greenerteacups]

I’ve meaning to send this ask for ages and finally found the courage to do so :) I started reading lionheart on a whim in the beginning of November and since them after reading everything a couple of times, all I can say is that it is a masterpiece. I am so in love with your writing, especially with how you give Draco the space to be gracious and grow up. I love for example when they are in the Slytherin common room and Draco see for himself that the mermaids are sentient beings just like him. Also, I am completely enamored with the golden quartet (?), the relationships between them feel much more balanced, and I have so much love for Harry, Hermione, and Ron. I do think you does the characters justice, if not written in a better and more honest, human way. Btw, I love your Narcisa because I am such an apologist for her and her crimes. (If Narcisa has million fans, then I'm one of them. If Narcisa has one fan, then I'm THAT ONE. If Narcisa has no fans, that means I'm dead.). This also aplies for hermione. Anyway, all I am trying to do is to put into words what the world you design means to me, but alas I do not seem to have. When the time comes for my unborn children to read the Harry Potter series, I am showing them your books and telling them it is canon.

Now that I am done showering you with complements, I have a couple of questions. First, after reading the last chapter (which I adored), the fight between Draco and Sirius, one of my favorite moments, kept coming to mind. Was it intentional for Draco to give such honest wake up call for Theo basing himself from the talk he had with Sirius years ago? Secondly, I am not sure with you already answer this, if so, feel free to tell me, but if you could choose Poet, Soldier or King for each – Draco, Harry, Hermione, and Ron – which one would they be?

Thank you for taking the time to read. I usually download each chapter because I like to highlight my favorite parts, I will try to be more present on AO3! And sorry for any English mistakes, it is not my first language!

Thank you, my friend! This is a completely lovely ask, and as I often do with lovely asks, I've hoarded it for a while to re-read whenever I want a nice treat. However, I've left the question unanswered long enough.

If we're going to do the Soldier/Poet/King test, I want to complicate it a little. You can either do it by personality (the way we do when we say "I'm soldier!" or "I'm poet!") or you can do it by narrative role, i.e. what you actually do in the context of the story. Those can be different. For instance, you can be a poet-coded soldier (your chosen weapon is your word, but you're pushed by your circumstances to fight), or a soldier-coded king (you carry a mighty sword, but you're forced off the battlefield to rule, i.e. you want to fight but you can't). That opens up the range of ways to fill the role. So it's like:

Obviously, the central axis here is going to be the most satisfied/content with their lot in life, but there's a broad range of happinesses.

If you ask me, Harry is a poet-coded king, because he's incredibly reluctant to take leadership, and he doesn't want anyone to fight for him. He runs away in Deathly Hallows because he can't stand to be at the center of a war (which is going to happen anyway) and has only accepted Ron and Hermione's sacrifice begrudgingly. It's also worth saying that Harry's best moments come when he's trying to talk someone down: he's telling Remus to go back to Tonks, he's telling Slughorn to preserve Lily's memory by being noble for her sake, he's telling Riddle to "try for remorse." Harry is at his best when he's giving consolation and understanding, not when he's fighting; his signature spell is Expelliarmus. Kid's not a soldier. And he hates the idea of being a king. (This is, not coincidentally, one of the unhappiest combinations.)

I read Ron as a true soldier, not because he enjoys fighting, but because that's almost always his knee-jerk reaction to conflict, and it's also where a lot of his strengths lie. Ron is brash and bold and he will swing if you step to him, and that's why people love him (or hate him, if they do). Even in his best moments, when he's being a strategist and tactician, he's employing his skills in the service of battle. And the narrative is happy to put him in positions where that's the skill he has to contribute. He thinks of the basilisk fangs and the house-elves in the kitchens; he's good at tactics, but he doesn't do broad-strokes strategy.

Hermione is king-coded soldier, because I think in a different series of novels, she is absolutely the protagonist, and she kind of thinks she should be. She's proactive, driven, clever, and calculating, and she orders people around like she's the boss of them — usually with good reason, but she still does. She sees herself as the HBIC, and she often gets a bit irritated when other people don't jive with that idea. It's funny how often Harry gets along by just doing what Hermione tells him. That being said, her narrative role is being sworn in Harry's service, and as the books go on, she increasingly embraces that. She defends him and offers to risk her life for him, sacrifices volumes (her parents!!) and compromises her safety (gets tortured!) for his sake, all without complaining or seeming to begrudge Harry at all. He's her king; she's his knight. Which is another way of saying soldier.

Draco is a poet-coded soldier, or possibly a poet-coded king, depending on what direction you take his arc from the source material. In the books, he's kind of a flop, God bless him, he doesn't really manage much in the final days of the war. Besides refusing to identify Harry (after identifying both of Harry's well-known travel companions... booboo you tried), he's basically fit for neither use nor ornament from Book 6 onward. But taken more broadly, he is someone who absolutely does not want to be here — he doesn't want to fight, he doesn't want to be in danger, he doesn't want to risk people — getting conscripted forcibly into a conflict that was running for years before he was born. And he's conscripted, like Harry, because of his heritage; it's a position he was born into. Depending on how you read his relationship to power, and having it, he can either be a soldier or a king, or someone teetering on the cusp between them.

[platadesangre]

we NEED to talk about jcs 1975 madrid cast!

i have come to make camilo sesto justice

(i finally finished this post yay!)

i may be a bit biased, since this was my first jcs.

short story on how i discovered it

my dad used to be an apostle for a bootleg staged playback jcs in peru during the 70s! they used this version.

he had the cd. he also had the mp3 files. i used his computer, so that was how 13 year old me found it.

those were tough times, bc later i started doing catechesis and i kind of got depressed and started questioning my faith lol. judas' character really resonated with me

since this is a recording, i didn't have any footage to reference, so i made up everything in my mind. (this is why it was a bit weird for me to see the english productions, bc they looked nothing like in my head lol)

now, a bit of historical context for spain in the 70's

camilo sesto was a popular spanish singer and actor who went to see the jcs 1971 broadway production in london. he loved it so much that he did everything he could do financially to bring the show to spain.

spain was in a fascist dictatorship at the time

they fought with censorship for years, that's why the lyrics are a bit different (i'll make a post about that too)

they had to remodel the alcalá-palace theater stage entirely

franco (our dictator) died two days after the premiere (about time lol)

the "ultras" (conservatists) didn't like the show so they did lots of crazy stuff (for example, praying for the cast outside the theater or sending BOMB THREATHS?)

anyways, this was the first official translation for jcs!

on the main cast we have

camilo sesto as jesus christ (he wanted the role from the beggining)

teddy bautista as judas iscariot

ángela carrasco as mary magdalene

here's an old pic of them (and some apostles)

(now that i look at it closely, it kind of looks like a bootleg jcs 1973 lol)

on the recording

it's a stereo recording, so use both headphones or you'll miss out on half of it

musically speaking, it's similar to the og concept album (songs ending on fade-outs and shorter trial before pilate) but it has some interesting choices (teddy, the producer and the voice of judas, took a lot of... artistic liberties)

some things this version has

it adds lots of synth. it's very psychodelic. i understand this can be a turn off for some people

they kinda change the key to many songs. maybe to fit vocal ranges idk

teddy just loves to make up new melodies (please give this man some water)

EPIC GUITAR SOLO in what's the buzz

what's the buzz and strange thing mystifying are separated tracks for some reason

camilo sings so good

cute synth in everything's alright ángela has such an angelic voice she makes such a good mary

the drums and guitars during this jesus must die are so danceable

the BEST simon zealotes i've heard. shit goes HARD. he goes CRAY

i really love this pilate, in my rating he would be the best one

camilo's "¡SALVAOS VOSOTROS!" during the temple is really pathetic lol

damned for all time interlude replaced by synths. the SAX SOLO is also replaced by synth (questionable choice)

cool thing happens during the end of this song that i'll talk about in another post

judas' occasional nervous laughter really adds to his character

also he cries a lot

"you sad pathetic man" part during last supper is... fairly different! (i'm looking at you teddy...)

camilo's gethsemane is epic. he's a baladist singer but MAN he can ROCK

cool harmonica during the arrest

i'll never shut up about our pilate (he nervous laughs too)

herod is so fruity

judas' death really hits different when you were depressed and questioning faith (this version is BRUTAL) also lyrics change (i'll talk about it i swear)

teddy's one of the few judas who sing the i don't know how to love him reprise in the higher scale!! it sounds so painful and anguished

the album continues acceptably

other cool things it has

jesus and judas have this interesting accent difference. since camilo is from valencia, he has this pristine and traditional spanish accent. and teddy is from canarias (also lived in the usa) so his accent is rougher and more, crusty? idk how to explain it but it's neat and stablishes their dynamic a bit. (ángela is from dominican republic! but her accent is barely noticeable)

on the footage aspect, we only have old vhs videos and live audios uploaded on youtube. also some old photos

there is a book about this version. it has some anecdotes (only available in spanish)

now we have a 4 episode mini-series about the odyssey that it was to produce this. it's called "camilo superstar" (i won't be watching it bc it's a bit fan-ficy from what i've seen)

the posts i'll make about this production will be tagged as #jcs 1975 madrid

you can listen to it on spotify!

or on youtube (playlist made by me)

[da-janela-lateral]

MP100 manga liveblog: V. 01

Hello! As some of you may have seen before, I'm on a mission to read all of my MP100 mangas before the ones I've bought arrive — which are volumes 13, 14 and the REIGEN spin-off. During this process, I'll leave here my reactions and opinions to each individual manga. Let's start, then!

Volume 1 most be the one I have read the most, because I keep saying I'm going to read the whole manga and forget to proceed with it. There is not much I can add except for my usual notes.

Everybody is so blunt its hilarious. It's not even only characters of whom this behavior is more expected, such as Reigen: Mob keeps saying things to people's faces.

Reigen is such a huge conman. The manga makes it even more obvious, which scenes such as him keeping guessing what was the "problem" with the client who visited adult sites.

Reigen you were rude as hell on the start I'm sorry.

Tsubomi is much more of a mysterious, unapproachable perfect girl than her anime version, which paints her as more friendly and extroverted individual.

Mob knowing that Reigen is a fraud, even if indirectly, is more clear. He questions Reigen's motives with calling and keeping him on Spirits and Such several times.

Other thing which was made more clear to me is in which sense Mob made a promise to the Telepathy Club. He not only appeared to be convinced to join, but also was about to take the papers to the Student Council. Of course his posterior choice to join the Body Improvement Club made Tome get pissed off...

I love getting to see the other clubs on the Student Council's blacklist. What do you mean Leg Shaving Club. "Flirting with the Chicks" Club? Cussing Club?? Tsubomi Fanclub??? How did they allow these to get created on the first place???????

The comedic timing is impeccable. "How did you guess it?" when the LOL Cult member made her 46477277th guess of what made Mob upset. And she was just. : \

The art is so expressive. This is a huge advantage to me.

Mob your repression is very much interesting to me. The flashbacks don't make time periods clear but he didn't seem to react in a socially acceptable way even before he started repressing his emotions.

The fact that Mob only showed his powers in public during his first school years, yet most people don't react to them as if they were a worldbreaking thing, REALLY caught my attention. This is just my worldbuilding fanatic mind in alert.

Mezato have I ever mentioned that I'm fascinated by you.

The hypnosis forcing the LOL Cult members to laugh in any occasion and making them lose the milk challenge is way more explicit.

Hey what do you mean Dimple's hypnosis with the LOL Cult is low quality.

I'm actually making lots of notes about the info the manga gives about how spirits and ESP work! But this is a separate project.

The omakes are very fun to read! I believe they'll fulfill my need for extra characterization by this time.

THIS PANEL IS SO FUCKING GOOD I'M DYING:

THIS IS THE PEAK OF COMEDY MAYBE.

Unrelated translation notes (this is the Portuguese edition):

The translation felt a bit awkward at times. There are occasions in which I'm confused about if the strange word choices were intentional or a false cognate from an English version.

For example, on Dimple's internal dialogue about how Mob was ruining the ambient he had built for LOL, he says the phrase "Para se tornar deus... é necessário eliminar todos os que disturbem a ordem que eu criei." ("In order to become [a] god... it's necessary to eliminate all those who disturb the order that I created".

The verb "disturbar" is not incorrect, but it's not common either. Most people would prefer to use "perturbar" or even "transtornar" in this context. Even verbs with a different and more colloquial meaning like "romper", "interromper" or "bagunçar" could be used to make a slightly different phrase yet transmit the same message! Because Dimple doesn't talk in a particularly formal or overdramatic form in other dialogues, this choice struck me as weird, and may look like a direct translation from the English "to disturb". But well, it's being used in a correct form so...

(I'm not neglecting the fact Dimple is refered as Hanako on his true form reveal though)

[egophiliac]

Hello!! I'm in love with your artstyle (especially the way you did the signature spells??? I've been looking at them for a while adsgfdfsf, they look like movie posters tbh and that's fricking cool to me. anyway!! I'm a player on the NA server (btw, I've already seen spoilers of chap 7 due to tumblr/reddit/pinterest, so yeah it's not the most spoiled I've ever been so yea) and yeah. I'm getting through the story okay but do you have any advice for people trying to get through certain events with a more limited life schedule??? Also, what are some of the differences that you notice between the english (if you see a lot of it??) and Japanese versions of the game? sorry if this was a longer ask, i tried to be simple but i wanted to tell you that I loved your art and everything just spiraled AAAAAAH

thank you! ❤️❤️❤️ I've been surprised by how many people really like my posters -- it's kind of a weird style to do fanart in, I guess, but I'm glad other people think it's cool too! :D

(gonna answer out of order because the event stuff turned into a huge block of text, sorry!)

I've seen a few of the localizations, but I don't know a lot about the Eng version, so I can't speak too much about differences. (I do think "housewarden" has a better sound to it than "dorm leader" though...they need a fancy little word to match their fancy little outfits.) I did look up the unique magic/signature spells to see if they were able to somehow work in the glossing -- I'm not even sure how you would localize that without it being super weird, so I don't blame them, but I was a little sad anyway! :( in Japanese, they're all written as Japanese phrases with the English as ruby text, and sometimes they're given a little extra meaning. like -- this is where the episode 7 spoilers I'm tagging are) the words that Mal says are "Fae of Maleficence":

but the meaning of the Japanese is "Blessing", which is a nice little "ooooh" moment given the context of it!

there isn't always an extra meaning, sometimes it's just. super literal. but my other favorite is Jack's, where what he means is "✨howl that pierces the moonlit night✨", but what he actually yells is "UNLEASH BEAST" before turning into a giant dog. what a good boy.

as for event advice (under the cut, because this was already getting long)...

speaking as someone who is 100% F2P and therefore also tends to get kind of burnt by some of these events -- the #1 most important thing is to just...make peace with not getting everyone. :') I am a collector-type person, so it definitely gets grating when I can't have all the fancy PNGs my little packrat heart desires. generally though: never do random pulls, always be saving your keys and gems between events. (once a month you can buy a 10-set from Sam for a 50 gem discount, and logging in on a character's birthday will give you a 10-set for free, so make sure to do those!). when the event info starts coming out, pick one or two cards that you really want and work specifically towards those, focusing on grinding out the items and/or using your saved-up pulls on their specific banner. and in the end, accept that it might just not be meant to be, even if you hit the 100-pull pity SSR no I'm not still bitter over fairy gala Ortho why do you ask. if the event doesn't have any cards that you really want, take it as an opportunity to save for the next one!

hoard your star fragments (the things that restore AP) -- if you're going for a card that requires grinding event items to permanently unlock, and the item is one you get from lessons, you can use star fragments to bump your AP up to 30 at a time (10 is the limit that will restore over time, but 30 is the max you can have at once). that makes for a looong lesson loop, but I usually get about 50-60 items per 30 lessons, and I just let it run in the background while doing other stuff. (usually these items are what also unlock the event story, so I'll do a huge amount of lessons first thing and then have enough to get the whole story at once. 👍) it can get really grindy, but events go on for a while so it's not usually that bad if you space it out a bit, instead of waiting until the last minute to try and get those last 600 items (cough) (cough).

if it's one of the ones where you get the item from doing a rhythmic, you get the same amount of items no matter how well you do, even if you miss every note. so you can just...tap occasionally to restart it and get the same effect. if it's a battle one, you do have to actually win to get the item, but once you figure out the sweet spot of a team setup + highest battle level where you win every time, it becomes basically the same deal.

so...yeah, tl;dr you can get away with a lot just by setting things up to run in the background and paying just enough attention to tap through some of the menus. it does require a certain amount of time to just leave your phone while still sorta-kinda paying attention to it, so it might not work for everyone, but that's the best way I've found to get through most events!

[kanmom51]

JM Like crazy - my crazy thoughts

First of all, stream stream stream.

Now, let's talk about Like crazy a little.

I'm trying to soak it all in, so I will probably miss some stuff, but I'll give it a try.

The visuals are incredible, no doubt.

And the message is there, a little hidden, a little double twisted, so to speak, because I see what people are throwing out there. All heteronormative and all.

But peeps (gosh, I've been loving using that word lately), I see so much more than a man and a woman, that don't interact, did you notice that part all of you that are saying he's going in to kiss her. Like where the hell did you get that idea from?

I'm not going to do a second by second breakdown of the clip but I'm going to leave you with a few of my thoughts.

Oh, and so fucking what if he starts it out with "she"...does that mean the song is about a her? I really really don't think so. But I'll get to that.

This is a good explanation about the she:

Dropping this pic here too...

Oh, and I don't remember, did I say the English lyrics are different than the Korean. Imma gonna talk about the Korean, cause they're the ones that are on the clip, not to mention they are more telling, in my opinion.

Ok then, let's get going...

JM in the club.

Standing alone.

Zoom in on the eye then zoom out, flashback Serendipity. And why do I say Serendipity you ask? Well, because, you'll see ya'll. Stop being so impatient.

When he's singing:

"She's saying: Baby, don't think about it There's not a bad thing here tonight..."

The room is clean.

It goes on:

"baby it's fine if you leave, stay with me just for today" - room turns muddy, dirty.

That's where I feel the quote ends.

The she explained above makes so much sense in this context.

He continues with

"watch me go keep me drenched all night (away), so that morning gets drunk and never comes..."

I'm getting used to it

Did I come too far to find the me you used to know?

Yeah I know

You know

I know

I'd rather be...

Something look familiar?

Perhaps certain "I know you know I know" lyrics?

He is running into that bar/club and he's alone, he's drinking, he's 'having fun', but at the same time he's not, and when he's dancing and making contact with another, he has his arm around another guy.

This

Him walking against the stream, looked at, perhaps judged, and singing

I'd rather be lost in the lights I'm outta my mind

Please hold onto the end of the night...

walls closing in on him (hallway narrower than it was a second ago).

Now this part in the lyrics.

Nah, I will not accept any other interpretation (though I know there are hundreds of them), but nope, this is mine and I'm sticking with it:

Each night

you spin me up high

(psss...the dirt again people)

the moon embraces you

Let me have a taste

Give me a good ride

Ooh, surprise a queer couple...

Oh, and the colours...do we have gold/yellow and purple?

We have people making out, not JM. JM is by himself. It adds to the feeling of loneliness.

He's singing

forever you and I', but he's standing alone...

Then the bathroom scene.

Again he's alone.

I'm going endlessly crazy

I'd rather be lost in the lights

I'm outta my mind

(bathroom walls coming apart, leaving him standing alone...

Each night

You spin me up high

The moon embraces me

Let me have a taste

All while he's here:

Yes, he's 'showcasing' a hetero couple, but once again he's standing or sitting on that screen alone.

We have a hetero couple shown all while he's singing about what he'd rather be doing...

Then again, repeats the "give me a good ride", again standing alone in the crowd.

It's gonna be a good night

(oh I'm falling)

Forever you and I

No don't you wake me

I wanna stay in this dream, don't save me

I need a way we

I need a way we can dream on

Euphoria vibes much?

"Won't you please stay in my dreams, yeah...

Even if the earth crumbles No matter who shakes this world Don't let go of my hand Please don't wake me up from this dream"

Pausing one second here, crying a little.

Moving on...

He walks back into the room, on the way he's leaving muddy footprints, the room is dirty, muddy, his hands smeared with mud, which he spreads on the screen.

Yeah, every single work I say here can be total crap.

But it can also be all true. I certainly feel like it is.

There are too many references. Coincidences once again?

I don't think so.

Oh, and there's this:

That's it for now folks.

If I have more thoughts on the matter, I'll definitley come back.

This is me writing a few crazy thoughts after watching Like crazy a few times.

Go stream!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[renaisguy]

Celebrating TOA and the people who contribute to make our group what it is.

Repost, don't reblog. Only fill in what you feel comfortable sharing!

Happy anniversary, TOA! Here's to many more years spent together.

Name: Ashera

Pronouns: they/them

Birthday (no year): 6th June

Where are you from? What is your time zone? England, GMT

How long is your roleplay experience? I think it must be like 10 years technically

How were you introduced to roleplaying as a whole? Naruto OC roleplay on Google+

How were you introduced to TOA? I played FE4 and the brainworms took over, so I started following the genealogy tag on tumblr. I kept seeing posts about X character being accepted to the officer's academy, so eventually I looked into what that was all about.

Do you have any pets? No.

What is your favourite time of year and why? (Season, holiday, general period) My wardrobe is minmaxed for warm weather, I hate layers and I like having my window open, and having hours and hours of daylight. So summer.

What is your IRL occupation? IT.

Some interests and things you like/enjoy? Pixel art and cross-stitch, card games, social deduction games, doctor who, long walks.

What non-Fire Emblem games do you play? Zero escape, Aitsf, puyo puyo tetris, balatro, slay the spire, ace attorney, umineko, other vns.

Favourite Pokemon type & Pokemon: Delphox. I like dragon, fire and dark types.

Tell us some fun facts and trivia about yourself! (Optional bonus challenge: if you filled this out last year, try not to repeat what you said back then!)

I like dressing fancy. I regularly go to hang out with my friends wearing floor-length gowns, my grandad's boat cloak, and heels. I have a drag queen friend who sometimes gives me clothes he doesn't want any more, and it's great.

(Apart from the wrinkle where RD is technically my brother's and not mine) I own every FE game that got an English release.

I will always spell things the British way.

How did you get into Fire Emblem? At the time feh was released I was just playing every nintendo mobile game that came out. I thought the characters were cute and I found a second-hand copy of birthright sometime later. I then had to wait until Christmas to play it cause my brother's 3DS was broken.

What Fire Emblem games have you played? Beaten: Genealogy, Blazing Blade, Sacred Stones, Radiant Dawn, Shadow Dragon, Awakening, Birthright, Conquest, Echoes, 3 Houses, 3 Hopes, Engage Played a decent amount of: FE1, Binding Blade, Path of Radiance, Warriors

First & Favourite Fire Emblem games: First: Heroes/Birthright. Favourite(s): Genealogy, Sacred Stones, Radiant Dawn

List your 5 favourite Fire Emblem characters across the series! Laylea, Dew, Forde, Larcei and Jeritza. Maybe. I have too many faves.

Who was the first character ever to make you go “ooh I like this one in particular” and why? Can be any context and reason! I liked M!Robin's art in heroes and he was the first 5* I summoned. Also I fell in love with Kaden the instant I met him cause he's cute (unfortunately my Corrin was already married)

Any Fire Emblem crushes? Like so many. For brevity I'll give the biggest one from each game: Wolf, Sonya, Arvis, Karel (FE7), Joshua/Cormag, Nasir, Reina, Jeritza, Zelkov. Shout out to Arvis for being the reason I played FE4 to begin with, and Jeritza cause the morning he became playable and bisexual I went insane.

If you’ve played (or are familiar with) the following games, who was your first S support? Who would you S support nowadays? I prefer to S support a new character each run cause I like filling the support log. The only time I've S supported a character more than once is the bisexual ones in 3H. So instead I'm giving my first and my favourite. Also at this point I've played 3H so much there's only like, 6 characters I haven't S supported. - Awakening: First: Miriel, Favourite: ??? - Fates: First: Jakob, Favourite: Kaden, Reina, Mozu - Three Houses: First: Jeritza, Favourite: Jeritza - Engage: First: Zelkov, Favourite: Zelkov

Favourite Fire Emblem class? Swordmaster

If you were a Fire Emblem character, what would be your class and stats? Would you be playable? Mage cause they have cape. I'd have great stats (delusional)

If you were a Three Houses character, what would be your affiliation? (Black Eagles, Blue Lions, Golden Deer, Church of Seiros, Those Who Slither in the Dark, unaffiliated civilian, other - for example Almyran) Black Eagles.

If you were an Officers Academy student, what would be your boons, banes and potential budding talent? Boons: Reason, Axes, Authority. Banes: Heavy Armour, Riding, Faith. Budding talent: Faith.

If you were an Engage character, which nation would you originate from? (Firene, the Kingdom of Abundance; Brodia, the Kingdom of Might; Elusia, the Kingdom of Knowledge; Solm, the Queendom of Freedom; Lythos, the holy land of the Divine Dragon; Gradlon, the desolate land of the Fell Dragon) Firene.

How do you pronounce TOA? 🤔(separate letters, to-ah, other?) Tee-Oh-Ay

Current TOA muses: Forde

Past TOA muses? Larcei, Tine, Dew, Yune, Laylea

Who was your first TOA muse? If you no longer have them, can you see yourself picking them up again? I had Larcei for over a year and honestly I'm really happy with what I did with her (even if rereading her stuff makes me cringe). So as much as I love her I have no strong reason to pick her up... apart from that swordmaster drabble I never got around to.

Do you believe you have a type of character you gravitate towards writing? (If you filled this out last year, has this changed in any way?) There's overlap between the 'old' and 'new' gens of my muses. There's a hotheaded sword girl, a mage with issues :tm: and a cute blond guy. I think I have an easier time writing characters that have a positive outlook, and say what they mean.

Do you have characters or types of characters you don’t think you can handle writing, but wish you could? Idk really. I don't think I'm that good at writing sad shit, so muses that have heavier stuff going on I'd struggle with.

What kind of scenes, situations etc do you believe you enjoy writing the most? (If you filled this out last year, has this changed in any way?) I like being a little silly. Some of my favourite posts have been where I've just thought up some nonsense, and allowed myself to write it.

Do you have any scenario in mind for your muse(s) that gets you thinking “man I hope I get to write this one day”? I want Forde to be obliterated emotionally. I do not care if these emotions are positive or negative.

Favourite TOA-related memories? SO many this group is awesome. I loved coming back after some time off and seeing what muses were still around. There's one in particular that Larcei and Forde are both close friends with and it cheeses me so much. Anyway happyland was my favourite event ever thank you mods.

Present or past tense? Present usually, but sometimes I use past don't worry about it.

Normal size text, small text, no preference? The most formatting I do is the occasional italics.

Got any potential muse delusions to share? There is *someone* who's been on my mind... (but really I have no strong muse thoughts at the moment, and I don't think I have the energy to double muse rn)

[alatismeni-theitsa]

Hey theitsa! I’m a second gen Greek-American and unfortunately a lot of my family is pretty racist. The reason why I bring this up is because they use a certain word for black people that, because of their ideology, I can’t trust is a respectful term. While I doubt it will come up in regular conversation, I’ve seen mostly debates about Ancient Greek terminology for black people and not modern Greek besides a quora post. Do you have any insight on this vocabulary issue? Ευχαριστώ θείτσα!

Hello there! The issue is not too clear in Greek either because the Black community in Greece is very small and also diverse. Looks like the most used and accepted term is "Afrogreek" but I've heard some call themselves Black ("Μαύρος") online and in a discussion by the Anassa institute.

"Afrogreek" is more prevalent because most Black people here atm are 1st, 2nd, 3rd gen immigrants from various African countries. Of course not all Black people identify as Africans so it's best to ask each individual what they're comfortable with.

In the TedEx below, Idra identifies as "Αφροελληνίδα" early on and few seconds afterwards as "μία Μαύρη γυναίκα". (Idk if "Μαύρη" should be capitalised but for now I'll keep it like they do in English)

Greek language doesn't feel too comfortable colouring people linguistically, especially since a few decades ago "Μαύρος" was used in the offensive call "ο Μαύρος" for Black people. (And still today) "Μαύρος άντρας/Μαύρη γυναίκα" are okay because "Μαύρος" in this is an adjective that describes the person. While in the offensive scenario the person is assumed to be their colour. In a similar fashion it's more polite to say "ο κοντός άντρας" instead of "Ο Κοντός".

In Greece people might not be too familiar with color terms for people but there's a need for the terms "Λευκός" and "Μαύρος" to exist in order for anti-racist discussions to take place.

The two words I mentioned (Μαύρος and Afrogreek) are the appropriate ones and - afaik - other terms are not acceptable. "Έγχρωμος" , the translation of "person of color" is not acceptable and it also doesn't make sense linguistically for us, as Indra also notes in the video.

Now, just in case you want to know about a specific word, I'd say go ahead and ask by writing the word. (In ask or in a DM) You don't have to do it, I'm just saying. This will be for educational purposes only cause there are quite a few bad words around and I cannot imagine what your family uses. And we cannot know the proper context of words, and if they can or cannot be used, if we never ask about them. As long as we don't endorse slurs and don't use them to characterise people, it is okay to identify them and learn why they're wrong so the next time we hear them we can also explain to others why their use should be avoided.

Check my tag #afrogreeks for more! Searching "Afrogreek" on YouTube also gives some very interesting videos.

Anyone who knows more feel free to chime in!

[fitzrove]

Now that I'm talking about history sklslsldldld here's another post...

Historical accuracy in fanworks - why?

A recurring thing w me is that people get annoyed with how obsessed I am with historical accuracy 😭😅 Like people have had to physically restrain me from doing 5 hours of research for a throwaway line in a fanfic, and one friend and I once had an hour long argument about word choice... But unfortunately I am just Like This lmao.

The thing is though, it's not because of any inherent sense of superiority or anything like that lol, I just have preferences. Also, I'm not the kind of person that needs everything to be 100% accurate all the time, I can still have fun JAPFLDPGPF. Basically, for me it comes down to a few things:

1. Suspension of disbelief / immersion

With historical fiction, the "he would not fucking say that" kicks in w dialogue easier than w something set in the modern day. Sometimes it's because of glaringly modern language (a 19th century guy going "sup" or something xD) but other times it's because a character is way too familiar with people of a different class, or acts/dresses/speaks too casually in general.

My hugest pet peeve with this are character names for side characters that the author made up 😭😭😭😭😭 As a non-native English speaker I don't really get the urge to insert random English names into my stories even when the stories are in English, I always look up the historical context and try to use names that a parent would give their child in that context. I'm sorry for naming and shaming but in one tdv fic Alfred's surname was Smith and I had to put down my phone because it broke my immersion so badly xD

2. Enjoyment

Historical accuracy can also be a characterisation thing!!! With crown prince rudolf of austria specifically his whole appeal as a character comes from his neuroses, and his neuroses are the specific way they are because of his specific position and status, and all that those entail in his historical context. It makes a story so much more interesting if these are properly taken into account 👀

3. What's the purpose of fanfic?

To me personally the purpose of writing and posting FANfic, as opposed to writing other stories, is threefold:

Making a point about the original story (is it a fix-it fic? An AU reimagining? A canon-compliant elaboration on something I think could expand upon a character's personality or two characters' relationship? These approaches all comment on the original work and its themes and characters.)

Personal enjoyment/self indulgence (I write what I would like to read)

Hopefully connecting with other fans (persuading them to see my Vision re specific characters/relationships, the setting, or the work as a whole; keeping the fandom alive; inspiring other people to make fanwork; providing entertainment; finding people who are the same kind of insane as you and making friends)

To me, putting historical accuracy into my fic or drawing inspiration from history fulfills all of these goals. With the first one: the original work usually comments on its era in some way as well, so drawing inspiration for the fic from that era complements it and keeps them grounded together. IRL history can also give you fun ideas to put in. W the second one: I love late 19th century history specifically and historical accuracy is my kink KSLFPEPDOFO. W the third one: I like sharing weird/funny/interesting historical facts w people so we can enjoy them together 😌 I also like Informing people of things that happened in history so hopefully they can have as much fun w the knowledge as I do. I try not to do this unsolicitedly and in general try to avoid criticising anyone for historical inaccuracies without being asked to because that's boring, I'm not trying to be cinema sins here

4. Exceptions

Sometimes historical inaccuracy is more fun than historical accuracy, though this is highly personal - you just have to do what you think is best and accept that something you enjoy might be something that breaks another person's suspension of disbelief (and hence makes them not enjoy the story). My personal metrics are roughly:

Sojblfpldlpf fun fact an unnamed person and I had a conversation about rudolf's probably not existing [redacted] register last night and while writing a fic about it would be historically inaccurate, the conclusions we arrived at about it were pretty funmy and interesting. With gay and homosexual implications

One of my favourite pastimes is to comb over crown prince rudolf's life and purposefully misinterpret random things as gay KSOGODPFOTK 😌😌😌 it's a good way to get fic ideas. So um yeah idk where I was going with this post haha

[loosingmoreletters]

1. Thank you and That One Anon for making the English speaking fandom for Weapon Creator!

2. In the name of bullying Yun Taeheon, I need his reaction to Mun Doyun- aka the B rank assassin that was Shin Junseo’s guild leader. Cuz objectively, Yun Taeheon knows a lot can happen in a year and stuff, but also he’s an S-rank leader of a top guild that is willing to give Shin Junseo just about anything and he still cannot recruit him. And then there’s this B-rank nobody (to him) who specifically hired Shin Junseo - as a D rank weapon creator who could only make an average knife every 20 seconds - BC HE HAD A SKILL THAST DESTROYED THE BLADES HE USED. Literally the same reason!! But no, somehow Yun Taeheon is losing this race.

Even better if he somehow gets more backstory or through some time shenanigans he meets the other Mun Doyun, who is basically the reason Shin Junseo is even as good as he is. Like, the reason sjs learned all he could and stuff. Anyway, yth being objectively, obviously on a higher level than this dude and yet still absolutely seething at the very idea of how much he apparently is not measuring up. How do you think that should go?

also, looking at the firsts chapter and think the first chapter and I think Sjs could be the little kid at the very beginning? Meaning that he has grown up in he world of hunters and gates, giving some cool world building to how this is a whole generation of ppl growing up with gates and magic.

However, for the sake of getting more of your sugar daddy au, I am ignoring that. Or maybe it could be incorporated, like- yth was trying to figure out how to ask sjs for just, an actual relationship. And sjs had stopped their contract after signing onto the guild. Extra tension!! Cuz obviously yth wasn’t gonna reach out and be like, “Hey, so that didn’t work out…”

glad to be of service!!!!! taking it from the bottom here, you mean this kid?

Huh! Now that you mention it, that could track! Would be rather interesting too as I'd put this kid somehwere between 8 and 12, which implies dungeons have been a thing for much longer than just a couple of years. Tho I assumed the adult in the next panel was YTH, so hmmm. But also what does this say about the state of his family. where the fuck are they. I need answers. And also I'd love some worldbuilding around growing up in such a world. In SCTIR, one of my fave things is to linger on like, the first weeks after the dungeon breaks. how did legislation change, the government, the way people reacto to this-

"In the name of bullying YTH" man we really all just took a look at this guy, who is probably meant to be like a cool badass character and decided we shall treat him like our sibling's new boyfriend and thus make fun of hinm. huh. god given right to bully the man.

But yeah, do you think YTH assumed just a little bit that SJS had like weird trauma. and also like- okay full confession time. when I started reading this, I assumed this guy would be our love interest second protag. I mean. look at him and SJS reaction to praise

and the way SJS also thinks of this guild in the future memories he receives? a place where he was accepted, found friends, where they kept pushing forward together- Listen. also the way it lingers on MDY's body there. I'm just saying, the vibes are accurate. to me.

Anyway, YTH does have the vibes of somebody who is incredibly understanding but privately also has beef with a dead man. he knows it's unfair and stupid, but also he could buy SJS a god damn pent house apartment. he would. that and any item he wants. actually I just realized while typing this would've been really fucking great to insert into my little soulmate fanfic given I did toss in like one sided bonds existing there. something to consider for the future.

But man, I think it would be interesting if SJS is confronted with him again also in the context of like, SJS not recognizing MDY's brother despite his future memories, which sure has some implication. I told a friend that like my assumption is that Mun Dojin died in the other timeline and I desperately need him and SJS to talk because even if the memories SJS has never actually existed here, that still sort of makes him the only person MDJ can talk to.

actually, man. this would make anything SJS/YTH even funnier. here's your crush. there's your crush's vampire familier and his ex guildmaster's (former bf's??????) little brother. god I need MDJ and Elizabeth to show up more often. slkdfhsldkh sorry got entirely off track here.

OKAY BACK TO SUGAR DADDY AU- I just realized how fucking hilarious this would also be because like. SJS manages to bag one man and it's this big shot guild leader. and instead of signing up with his guild, he goes to these small nobodies. like, it probably just makes sense to SJS. This was a job, now here is another, newer job. Life goes on.

YTH meanwhile is the math meme. Min Huisu told him to get a social life. he paid someone for that, but the guy turns out to be actually cute and fun, so he'd like to have a relationship that is not just superifical. and this guy just. mcfucking signs on to a guild he hasn't even heard of. f in the fucking chat

[autistic-fuckwad]

Pinned Post. Last edited August 9th.

uhh alright better pinned. hi, i'm autistic-fuckwad. you can also call me colton, but i prefer my username more.

i like sharks, cats, sushi, and being spitefully positive. yes, i know i used to be a cunt named M3G4L4D0N. I'm actively trying to not be cunt anymore. hate mail about that will cost you 200 bucks specifically. I was a teenager, still am, teenagers are assholes because learning how to handle big emotions without being a dick is a skill. I'm getting better about it. Genuine, good faith questions are fine, accusatory or asks asking me to "atone" are screenshotted and deleted for my own sake unless i feel like fucking with it. Death threats are just deleted.

Flight Rising sideblog is @roundhorn-melprin , I follow from here. Direct your FR drama to this blog if you want to.

Didn't you make fun of an ESL person?

Short answer: I was a massive asshole to a most likely homophobic Christian who defended "straight pride", but not to someone specifically for having English as a second language. I made fun of them for calling us children, but not knowing the proper you're. Yes, this was a disgusting, asshole move and yes I'm ashamed of it.

Long answer: The only reason everyone thinks they are ESL is due to a claim from a flight rising anon drama/hate website, called Anon Re Rising, that "pearl packaged horse shit" sounded East Asian. In reality, this quote comes from Angel Dust in hazbin hotel, where his accent makes "poorly" sound like "pearl". This is the only claim that says they could be ESL, as otherwise they spoke in perfect English and even used AAVE liberally.

I was an asshole to them only after they began insulting the LGBT+ community for not "accepting other views" which in this case, was that straight people deserve support too despite not being persecuted. They actively said we were intolerant and that they hated the LGBT+ community because we refused to listen to others and due to the infighting, and said they refused to be part of it due to this. They had used the slur ( this is a regional slur from the UK, as I've been told. I originally was told this was not a slur, I only parrot what lesbians tell me because I am not a lesbian. ) "les" to be shorthand for lesbian, and I told them not to use it as they are bisexual and cannot reclaim it in that context. This enraged them and they went on a tangent on how they shouldn't be corrected and that is when the insults started. I agree that I should not have insulted them back, and I regret it deeply. I have already received many, many death threats about this situation due to an AITA post I was accused of making. I did not make it, and I do not know who did. I don't care to find out, either. I just want to move on from this shameful situation.

my art is tagged as my art and my ocs are tagged with their names if you wanna hear more abt them

my commissions are open, if you're interested send an ask and we can talk about it

portfolio here

blog is full of my own art, memes, and hopeposting if i feel like it. please keep discourse away, and hate mail will cost you $100 dollars so i can pay for my phone bill. Terfs, radfems, exclusionist of any kind fuck off. Also racists and nazis go jump off a cliff.

wanna give this disabled funnyman some hope, or want me to get my cats some snacks?

$M3G4LAD0N