#I'm more than happy to help them develop their characters and it's cool to know how Akemi became more nuance to a buddy
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I can't stop having Jade thoughts so I'm gonna throw them at you.
I know people have talked about PTM yuu playing into Jade's dirty thoughts to get a rise out of him, but I really just... I can stop thinking of Yuu just giving Jade sudden and subtle compliments. Like they hear his thoughts and there's an insecurity he doesn't talk about and Yuu makes a comment to try to make him feel better. Or Yuu doesn't even have to be subtle in compliments. Maybe Jade did something different with his outfit or maybe is trying a new perfume to hopefully get Yuu's attention and Yuu didn't notice it but they overheard Jade's thoughts so they comment on it and Jade gets so happy.
Or Jade has thoughts of how he's trying to act cool or handsome but Yuu calls him cute or pretty instead. Like he wasn't expecting to hear that and now he's a blushy and having to hide away to get his act back together.
Also a kinds related but also not really thought. If Yuu ever comments how they can tell Jade's fake smiles vs his real ones how would Jade react? Luke his fake smile doesn't show teeth but his real one does or something. And if Yuu said they likes his real smile more or comments that his real smile is cute then what? Would he die?
Aaaaaa you can always send me Jade thoughts I love my darling Jade!!!
Would you all be surprised to hear that it's actually the sweeter things that make him fall further in love with Yuu and not just the more risque scenarios (tho he does love those too).
Jade as a character is always performing a certain way, not necessarily to please others but to get what he wants out of them. We can see it in other's perceptions in the game, his classmates know that Jade is just as unhinged as his brother and manipulative as Azul, but others don't. Trey thinks Jade is like him, trying to just placate situations and being a pushover to his housewarden and brother, when Riddle points out that it's very much not the case. Vil gets unsettled when Jade is able to perfectly perform every single task he's given, no matter how impossible. Even when his perfect image as a soft-spoken, polite man is shattered once others find out just how mean and condescending he is, there is still a general notion that he's capable, intimidating, and almost a miracle maker. In fact, he revels in how unsettled he makes others, finding it funny.
But he doesn't want Yuu to see him like that, he doesn't want them to be put off by him. But the reality is that they've already have been looking at that way, and it's been a whole year for them to develop their own notions of Jade as a person.
It's a deep insecurity he has regarding them, a fear that Yuu will never see past that image. Maybe it's why he has such vivid daydreams, ones skipping right over that roadblock and immediately turning into one where he's already won their heart, rather than fighting for it. He's a bit of a coward, he hates to admit it, the fear of not being capable for once stumping his development.
Of course, Yuu knows this, and as much as they don't want to admit it, they've grown fond of Jade the longer they hear his thoughts. He is so firm in performing a certain way, it's nice to hear how open he really wants to be with them. (It's also the fact that it's only with them he wants to be open with that makes them a bit pleased, even if they don't want to admit it.)
But it's a bit hard to do outwardly experience that when Jade is so firm on being be person he thinks they want, and the Seven know hat they won't make the first move, so they try what they can to pull him out.
"It's so rare to see you smile like that, I kinda wish you'd do it more."
"I like your hair when it's pushed back, makes you give off a different vibe...huh? What kind? Aaah, nothing important..."
"Come on, I see the gears turning in your head, you have a joke? Tell it, I don't mind!"
"I remember this! Epel's grandma really went all out with your clothes. Haha, you look kinda cute with that hat..."
It helps, Jade becomes less concerned about being a certain way around Yuu, but does become more preoccupied with trying to get them to say more things about him.
He's hoping, with how sweet their words are, that a slip of the tongue might bring out a confession. Yuu is hoping for the same. I suppose it's a matter of who will utter those three little words first.
#mochi asks#twst#twisted wonderland#jade leech#twisted wonderland x reader#twst x reader#jade leech x reader#ptm
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YEAH, it's quite funny looking back on that. It was something of a gradual change over time due to Hiro originally being an OC for...
Sighs.
...Five Nights At Freddy's.
Listen, she was created all the way back in high school when the fourth game came out and my friend brought me into his online friend's FNAF AU, and it just spiraled from there as we went crazy with the lore and made a TON of OCs for the series. A lot of which didn't really fit FNAF in general as we really went ham on the supernatural aspects like ghosts, angels, and demons and stuff, plus a few sci-fi elements thrown into the mix. And with how often the lore kept getting updated and changed with each installment in the series (and franchise), we were constantly adjusting a bunch of stuff in our stories for the AU.
We were (mostly) cringe-free back then, and I'll admit, I'm still attached to a lot of the ideas we came up with back then (hell, I still like FNAF). That being said, at this point in my life, I've been thinking on separating my OCs from FNAF altogether, mostly cause the lore we've come with doesn't really fit the FNAF world anymore as the stories we had listed out as planned (but never got around to finishing or even starting) started straying further and further away from the original appeal of the series, which is, "Security guard works at a kids' pizzeria which turns out to have haunted animatronics of dead children cause there was a serial killer back in the 1980s" thing. We got so wrapped up in the lore and certain elements that the animatronics just almost never appeared in a lot of these story ideas, except for, like, two of them, and just loosely tying in other canon characters.
With that context outta the way...I do have posts on Hiro. The thing is, though, this was from a time where I barely used Tumblr to share my own stuff, just liking and reblogging other people's posts. So it turned out I only had...two posts on Hiro. And that's from the Random-Questions-Fairy that I came across and liked and reblogged for some OC questions.
The first is about, "Does this character has pets or would like a pet?"
The second one being, "What kind of situation would your OC be willing to compromise on their values/morals?" (The third reason isn't wholly accurate anymore since I've been thinking over on what should be changed and such, especially since I want to separate Hiro's story from FNAF, so the context of the situation may end up quite different. It's still loosely accurate to her situation, but still.)
Also, I did actually write and post a fic on Hiro and her trauma back in 2022, I just completely forgot about it until now. Oops. It's kinda old now, especially since the few times her physical appearance is touched upon, it's based on her old design as I had given her a new one now. And I feel like if I were to write this scene into a story, I might change it, but I dunno. I haven't reread it in a long while. But if you want an idea of Hiro's story in the FNAF AU we made, there it is.
These were the only posts I've ever shared on Hiro, two on Tumblr, one on AO3. Honestly, I wished I talked about her a bit more, I still love her a lot, but I've always been nervous about talking about her and her lore due to her ties with FNAF. And also cause, well, my fixation on FNAF has waned quite a bit and SDRA2 basically dropkicked it into the far reaches of my mind. (I still think about it every now and then, but that did affect how I think about Hiro - which is, not as much as I used to.) But since you asked, I might as well take the opportunity to talk about her more and what her story would be like without FNAF in the picture.
Her full name is Hiroko Arai, and she was born in America. As a Japanese-American, her parents decided to give her a Japanese name so that she'd have ties to her culture. It's probably spelled with the Kanji, "to forgive, to pardon" and "child, offspring, young, junior, small thing", while Arai can either mean "new well" or "new residence" depending on spelling (I went with "new residence" as the spelling). Her friends and family all call her by her nickname, Hiro. The meta-reason why Hiro ended up with a Japanese name is because I was a lot more obsessed with anime back in high school. ^^;
Hiro has Time powers alongside her brother, which she inherited from her father and grandfather. Neither of which were actually human, but rather supernatural creatures of a higher being. The grandfather had initially come down to the mortal realm to fix some issues with the timeline as someone had restricted many possibilities of what could happen and had to be stopped (basically the backstory for an overarching story), even going as far as to create Hiro's father, but they never figured out a solution. The grandfather and the father had a bad relationship to the point that he cut ties with him, but he had mentioned him before to his wife, which came in handy when he had ended up passing away suddenly due to a car crash and the family needed a place to stay so she chose to take a risk. While the grandfather didn't fully understand what they did wrong, they had tried to be better for their son's family, and ended up having a much more amicable relationship with their grandkids. Tomomi (explained below) still found them unnerving at times.
The flat cap Hiro wears (pictured below) was her grandfather's. She was the closest to them and loved learning about clocks and their ideas on time and such. She never would've guessed that they were trying to help prepare her with her powers without forcing it onto her, as even if they were to remain dormant for the rest of her life and never were to realize that she had it, it would always be a part of her. She got her flat cap after her grandfather's mortal vessel expired ("passed away" in human eyes).
Hiro has a twin brother named Tomomi, which is spelled with the Kanjis, "wisdom, intelligence, knowledge" and "snake, serpent" ("智巳"). While their personalities were quite different from each other, Hiro being far more emotionally open, kinder and eager to play while Tomomi was more withdrawn, a loner, and far more quiet as he buries himself in his books, they were rarely seen apart. If one is not seen without the other, it's usually assumed that they were nearby but doing their own thing. Hiro and Tomomi bicker a lot, but were always the first to protect and support one another as they deeply love each other as siblings. Hiro always called Tomomi, "Tomo."
They were only ten-years-old when they were murdered, Tomomi poisoned with his body tossed into a river and Hiro having walked in on the scene of the crime, running into the forest in a panic and getting killed there via blunt force trauma. Tomo was found only twenty-four hours after his death. Hiro was found a year later by some hikers, her body haphazardly buried in the dirt.
Their deaths was when they found out about their time powers as the emotional pain of death made Tomomi unwittingly turn back time. However, since they were half-human, their time powers weren't as strong as their father's or even their grandfather's, so they were only able to go back one hour. This results in a time loop as Tomomi desperately tries to save himself, and eventually, Hiro. She didn't even realize what had happened at first until things started repeating over and over again and, due to retaining her memories of each loop thanks to having the same powers and awareness as her brother, tried to help save him as well. But due to the constraints of their powers, they were unable to escape their Fates, and kept dying over and over, and over again. The two of them end up giving up at some point, with Hiro being the first to give up and try and accept her death while leaving some kind of evidence behind for the authorities to capture their killer, while Tomomi took the longest as he was determined to not lose what he had...but eventually snapped and just let himself be killed.
Unfortunately, their pain doesn't end there as they end up becoming ghosts. Ghosts come into existence once someone has died, usually when they have a grudge to settle or some kind of unfinished business to attend to. The former usually happens when someone is killed in an uncommon way (murder) and the victim was aware of what happened to them or if they had beef with a living person upon their death and feel as if they deserved to finish what they started before moving on. The latter usually happens a person dies but still has some kind of final wish or even just wants to protect someone they loved. Many ghosts will move on with a bit of time or accomplishing their goals, but others get stuck in the mortal realm when they're unable to emotionally process what had happened. (This is usually when an Exorcist comes in to help the ghosts come to terms with their death, appeases their souls, and even help them with their goals...if it's morally sound, anyways.) Both of them were in pain for dying the way that they did, but Hiro was a bit more willing to move on as she just wanted some peace. Tomomi, who was broken and filled with resentment, is convinced that he's stuck like this, and doesn't even want to move on, not until he gets on their killer. Hiro is uncomfortable with her brother's change in behavior (she never saw and fully understood how desperate he was to survive their killer due to the time constraints of just trying to escape together and live), but chooses to stay by his side and support him.
Hiro and Tomomi's relationship starts to deteriorate over time, as while they both have the same trauma with experiencing their deaths over and over and over again through the time looping, neither of them are handling it very well, but ESPECIALLY Tomomi. He's become obsessed with getting revenge, trying to track him down through any means necessary, and he just keeps taking things too far to the point that people get hurt. Hiro tries to get him to stop but he won't listen, even snapping at her a few times for getting in his way. This comes to a point when Tomomi accidentally gets someone killed, which shocks both of them. But Tomomi, his soul having become tainted, tries to justify it to himself, saying that they merely got in the way, but Hiro snaps at him as they're LITERALLY dead, Tomomi! They...They caused that, Hiro having shown some taint on her as well for her minor role in the situation. This sparks an argument where Tomomi ends up talking over Hiro and proclaiming that if she's acting this way, then she can't possibly understand what he's going through, the pain and suffering he's felt for just losing his life over and over again! If accepting their death means letting go of their murderer, then he wants no part in it! Hiro is hurt by this, quietly biting back that yes, she does understand, because she's been put through the same thing he did. She just doesn't want other innocent people to lose their lives on this path of revenge. Tomomi wonders if they're even innocent, but eventually apologizes for snapping at her. Hiro apologizes as well, though, saying that she didn't meant to start an argument. Tomomi quietly begs her to stay, as he doesn't want to be alone so long as he remains as a ghost. Hiro is, again, uncomfortable...but continues to stay with him as he's her brother. Of course she can't leave him alone like this. However, their relationship doesn't improve from here as Tomomi continues to go down his path of destruction, Hiro struggling between supporting him and stopping him, but unable to choose between either. Hiro feels as though she can't speak up, and the few times she does, Tomomi ignores her or brushes her off, saying that once the killer is gone, things will go back the way it was before. Hiro, after watching another person die before her eyes, can only hope so numbly.
The Taint is basically what happens when a ghost does something immoral to another living being, causing harm to them in some way. Destroying relationships, driving someone insane, getting someone injured, or killing someone have different levels of taint but ultimately lead to one ending if the taint gets to a certain point the soul can't handle: the transformation of a Demon. There are at least two types of demons: one that is naturally formed from Hell and defined by a certain type of sin (ex. Pride, Greed, Wrath, etc.), or one where the soul of a ghost can no longer contain the taint in their thin forms and bursts, a shadow of their former selves as they go searching for more prey to feast upon. Young demons will usually go after any stray ghosts they come across as they are often easier prey than a human, who have far more protections to use against them, especially if they're able to resist any of their temptations. But older demons are far more dangerous as they're able to slip through the cracks of human society and manipulate a human into doing certain things that make them more vulnerable as time progresses, sucking away their energy until they can no longer resist and leaves them open for death. Many of these older demons have some kind of power that makes it easier for them to gain souls. This is why it's important exorcise both demons and ghosts, to keep people safe and to prevent a ghost's soul from being lost to the Taint.
There were other victims like Hiro and Tomomi, ones they sometimes came across during their journey they've been tracking down. However, they had never met the ghosts of these victims, either because they lacked the awareness of being murdered, wandered away from the location of their death, or just passed on over time. Hiro always tries to leave some kind of gift behind so they can rest in peace.
Hiro comes across a doll, one that seemed to have been tossed to the side, and decides to take it with them. After many years of trying to find their killer, she had grown used to her ghostly powers like teleportation, possession, and even telepathically carrying items. Hiro and Tomomi have grown very distant with each other over time, as Tomomi has become more toxic, clingy, and controlling of his sister, unwilling to let her leave his sight lest she ran into a demon and gets her soul taken. It's not an unfounded fear in this world, but he's not giving her any freewill on the matter, which makes it harder and harder for her to speak up on her feelings. But with the doll she has now, Hiro starts to talking to it in private, giving herself an outlet to let out all of her pent up emotions. She's desperate for a friend or even an adult she can rely on, someone that would support her and love her as she tries to cope from the stress of her watching people die, watching her brother become someone he's not, someone twisted and destructive. This continues for a long while until Hiro starts to break down a little, holding the doll close as the energy of her own soul brightens, begging for someone to help her. This imbues the doll with parts of her soul, and since Hiro was a half-human, it ends up being a very powerful one. One that transforms the doll into a tall, gangly being with strings attached. Hiro is shocked to see this, but since the being was imbued with Hiro's desire for a friend and an authority figure to rely on, they're quick to reassure her that everything is alright, having inherited traits that Hiro has perceived in the adults she grew up with: her mother's intelligence, her father's compassion, and even her grandfather's perseverance. The being proclaims itself to be Hiro's Guardian, and while Hiro doesn't necessarily understand what that means, she knew that she now has a friend to rely on and immediately clings to them. They play with her, recalling long forgotten childhood stories Hiro has heard to her, and give her a listening ear. Hiro has a good time, and even when her brother comes back from surveying the area, she greets cheerfully with her new friend, a jarring display if Tomomi ever saw one since he hasn't...seen her so happy in so long. He questions who the doll is, and they simply explain themselves to be Hiro's Guardian, willing to extend that same title to Tomomi as they are siblings. Tomomi is still suspicious but Hiro reassures him that they didn't offer any kind of contract, they just simply...came into being from the doll Hiro had. Tomomi isn't sure that that alone can be trusted, but decides that it doesn't matter now and tells Hiro to follow him. She reluctantly agrees, as she had hoped that Tomomi would at least get to know their new friend, which they simply reassure her that he may come around with time. For now, they ask her to give them a name, and Hiro thinks on it before settling on Mari. Hiro cannot remember how to do Kanji due to it being so many years, but she believes it can mean "Truth," "Reason," or "Love." Mari accepts their new name and shapeshifts back into their doll form so Hiro can hug them as they leave. They spend most of their time together, and even when Tomomi is at his worse, Mari is always there to help Hiro process her emotions, although due to being created from a part of Hiro's soul, they struggle to confront Tomomi themselves to get him to stop, especially as a part of them knows that they would do anything to protect these kids and struggle to wrap their head around Tomomi hurting Hiro. They're basically a young adult that doesn't really have much experience in dealing with children despite loving them a lot. But Hiro doesn't mind. She's just relieved to finally have a friend after feeling so lonely. Ha, lonely...she was never lonely around Tomomi but nowadays...she's not even sure she knows him.
Circling around to the concept of Guardians, Guardians are basically people that have passed onto the AfterLife, and are assigned to be a living mortal's support and protector. Usually Angels, people that have gone to Heaven for going above and beyond to help other people, are assigned to be Guardians, sometimes for a relative, sometimes for a stranger. But it's not uncommon for Lost Souls, people that have lived average lives and weren't exactly good or bad, in Purgatory to be assigned as Guardians as well, as a way to help them come to terms with their deaths, lack of purpose, and eventually bring them closer to being accepted into Heaven. It's almost unheard of for souls from Hell to become Guardians but if one were to try and reform, it is an option...but only for those that weren't reprehensible enough to get stuck in the lowest levels, as not everyone is allowed a chance for redemption depending on their record. These people are not necessarily demons, but due to how they have lived their lives when they were alive, harming others and perhaps even destroying lives, they are given far more restrictions as a Guardian, and that's only if they pass the test on whether or not they're genuine in trying to do better. Those on the lowest levels aren't even given chance due to how vile of a person they are...and they don't even want to change either. These types of Guardians are very rare...but it happens. Occasionally. Not just anyone become a Guardian, even as an Angel and a Lost Soul, as those who are more weak-willed may succumb to taint, even after giving a protective seal on their souls. They're also given permission to use certain powers if it will help them protect their mortal better. Mari, however, is a type of Guardian that can sometimes manifest in someone's time of need, usually in a beloved object they hold dear, and while Guardians don't usually protect the dead (they're meant to protect mortals, after all), if a ghost were to imbue an object with a desire like Hiro did, they would still be bound to protect that dead person. These Guardians are also ones ones that would take the initiative to protect that person but lack the seal to protect themselves from the Taint as they form outside the bounds of the ones that enforce how a Guardian is chosen, so it's generally frowned upon since they can be just as dangerous as a loose ghost or even a demon. So, not only did Hiro create herself a Guardian as a ghost, she accidentally broke a taboo in the process. Oops.
Demons also have their own versions of being "Guardians" through Contracts. They try to offer a human, usually a vulnerable one, a deal: they can give them this, so long as they're willing to offer them their soul by the time they accomplish their goal or when the contract expires. The demon will then support and protect them as they give the human power to accomplish what they need to do. Taking a demon's deal never ends well, as this is one of the first steps a demon will take to convince a human to commit atrocities throughout the duration, a slippery slope that gets harder and harder to pull yourself out of the more you're willing to bend your morals. And by the end of the contract, the Demon will take your soul, leaving an empty husk of your body behind. You may not even get to experience the rewards of what you've accomplished, but many humans think they can outwit a demon by reaping the rewards and then trying to get rid of them as soon as it's all done. This always seem to backfire as humans have already signed away their soul on those contracts, bound to give them up regardless of whether or not they want to back out. There is no way out, and an exorcists' advice is to ALWAYS never listen to a demon and run away while you still can. However, there are rumors of humans that have managed to accomplish turning the tables against a demon, but there doesn't seem to be any evidence of that ever happening. At least, for now...
Back to Hiro, their little group has come across many people as they search for their killer, but this was the first time they've come across an exorcist. The exorcist was clearly on a mission, asking them what they're final wishes are. Hiro doesn't get to answer as Tomomi brushes the exorcist off, saying that it's none of her business. The exorcist sighs, simply saying that she can help them move on and wrap up their final business. They don't have to keep tainting themselves anymore. But Tomomi doesn't believe her and tells her to go away, which only prompts the exorcist to shrug and say, "Suit yourselves. It took a long time to find you kids, I even spent all my down payment trying to keep up with you for weeks. But I have a job to finish, and if I have to do this by force...well, you're better off in the AfterLife. Trust me." And immediately attacks. This surprises both of them but Mari immediately jumps to defend them as their Guardian, shocking the exorcist but laughing along as she seems happy to get a bit of a challenge. It wasn't a very long fight...but it was one that Hiro didn't forget as Mari, in the snap of their fingers, freezes time for a few seconds and brutally cuts the exorcist with their strings. Hiro is shocked to realize that Mari has the same powers as them (due to them having a part of her soul) and watches as the exorcist goes down but is still alive. She cusses as she admits out loud that she had underestimated them. Mari goes to give the final blow, but before Hiro could even step in and beg Mari not to do this, she would never want this, the exorcist pleads for them to wait. They stop, ready to pounce at any moment, but giving her the time of day, even when Tomomi comes over to tell them to kill her, now. The exorcist laughs, saying that she was lucky that she had come prepared on more than one level before grunting as she pulls out an object: clear jeweled brooch, one that gave off a strange eeriness to everyone in the vicinity. The exorcist offers a deal: if she gives them this Brooch of Life, they'll let her go and she won't go after them anymore. Tomomi questions if she would keep her end of the deal and she simply replies, "Do I even have a choice? Just take this brooch and you'll be able to walk with the living again. Although I'll admit, I have no idea what effects it'll have on a ghost." They all exchange looks before Mari carefully takes the brooch from the exorcist before quickly backing away. When Mari proclaims that this is actually legit, the exorcist immediately drops a smoke bomb that explodes upon contact, quickly making her getaway. Mari almost goes after her but Hiro actually stop them. She's gravely injured, and didn't attack them like she said she would. They should let her go and follow their goals. Tomomi agrees, taking the brooch from Mari without a word but not putting it on. As they follow after him, Hiro tells Mari not to do that again. Mari says that it's their duty as their Guardian to protect her and they will do everything in their power to make sure she's never harmed again. They have seen what's been done to her through her memories, the repeated deaths, the lack of closure for her family as the police lose track of her own killer. They won't let any of that happen to her ever again, the taint all over their hands. Hiro is disturbed...but ends up letting it slide, simply asking them to promise to be more careful going forward. If they're going to be her guardian, she doesn't want them to kill unless they absolutely have to. They promise.
They finally track down their killer, Tomomi confronting them by making himself more visible to his eyes. Luckily, he is very sensitive to the supernatural, allowing him to both sense and see Tomomi, and Hiro without much effort. Since Mari has always been a doll at their core, they're pretty much visible as is. Tomomi corners their killer, demanding that he dies a miserable death like theirs. The killer laughs, saying that they have no idea why he did what he did, but he won't tell them since it's already too late. He's accomplished his goals and there's nothing they can do about it. This confuses Hiro but Tomomi doesn't care, trying to attack the killer on the spot. Mari, however, stops him, saying that he doesn't seem to care at all that they've tracked them down and that it could be a trap. Tomomi just stares at them...before suddenly grabbing their strings, taking control of Mari and using them to brutally kill their murderer. Hiro, for once in a very long time, immediately intervenes, fighting for control over Mari to protect them as they scream in agony, the Taint from Tomomi transferring over to them. Tomomi, on the verge of bursting into a demon, yells at Hiro, asking why can't she just trust him? Why can't she just accept what needs to be done? Why can't she just support him like she's supposed to!? Hiro, after putting up with Tomomi's toxicity for years, screams that he can do whatever he wants to her but never to her own friend! And turns the tables, taking control of Mari and wounding Tomomi's soul. This shocks everyone, Tomomi crumbling as he tries to keep himself intact. Hiro drops the strings and Mari, despite being in pain, scrambles over Tomomi, telling him that it's going to be okay, it's going to be okay. They have a solution, it'll be okay. They form a box between them, putting Tomomi inside and wrapping it all up until he disappears into their chest. Once Tomomi was gone, Mari tries to get their taint under control, pushing down Tomomi's memories, the murderous intent, the pain and suffering in his heart, feeling every single bit of it before it finally, finally subsides. They feel...different. But at least they had their free will back. Mari turns to Hiro to ask if she's alright, but sees the Brooch of Life in her hand. Tomomi must have dropped it in the scuffle. Mari didn't understand why Hiro was staring at it so intently, but for Hiro...Hiro realized something. She realized that she can't have a future like this. Not when Tomomi might disappear for good. Not when she's a ghost that has remained stagnant, hurting as the taint over her arms and face grew and grew. Not when she...she can't even age, for she is dead. But this brooch...if it works just like that exorcist said, even if she didn't know what would happen if a ghost were to use it...It wasn't even a question. Hiro puts the brooch over her heart and in an instant, her body glows bright, her body feels heavy (feel, she can FEEL), and she can taste the stale air, the smell of blood, everything all at once...until she passes out from her senses being completely overwhelmed. Mari catches her, shocked that she had actually done it without a second thought...but if that was her choice, then they would follow and protect her to the very end. And thus, they carried her out of the building, bringing her to a hotel for her to rest at.
Being sensitive to the supernatural is different for everyone. Some may notice a ghostly presence while another can just walk on by without even a shudder. Being sensitive to the supernatural is a basic survival instinct that humans still use to this day, as being aware that something is off can encourage people to avoid certain supernatural hotspots or even a single ghost or demon that may have ill will and just waiting for a chance to pounce on a vulnerable person. It's a sixth sense of sorts. However, being too sensitive to the supernatural can be very detrimental to one's mental health, some even losing their sanity for seeing so many dead people, creatures, and demons in the vicinity. Other times, lacking any sensitivity at all can lead to someone walking right into danger without realizing it. In the end, you're better off being more in the middle. At least your sixth sense will be going off every now and then without driving you paranoid.
Hiro's recovery was a slow one as it's been years since she's been an actual, breathing human. Mari always took the time to dote and take care of her, doing research on what kind of food she'll need and giving her plenty of entertainment through stories and TV time. The TV is a little different but she recognizes it as one that she's familiar with back when she was still alive so she grows comfortable in the hotel. The cartoons aren't familiar at all, though. In fact, the graphics don't match up with her memories period. It confused her. And scared her. After a few days and when she was able to start walking on her own, she asks Mari for a calendar as she's know when she died, she died on a holiday after all, she just needed to know what year it is. Mari does what they're told and brings her a calendar from the desk. She nearly drops it as soon as she reads the year. Hiro, she...she knew. She knew it's been years since she died. She saw how different certain things were as they traveled, how people's clothes had changed, the glimpses of different kinds of toys she never recognized, and the way people talked as she listens when she had nothing better to do when no one else can see her but Mari, Tomomi, and the occasional supernatural sensitive person. She just didn't realized it's been three whole decades.
And that is essentially Hiro's backstory, plus a few side notes on certain lore elements to explain what each term means in this world. There are certainly more elements to her story but I figured I'd cut off there in case I ever decide to actually sit down and write her story. Which won't be in her POV, at least not at the start since her revival is meant to be a mystery in the beginning as her childhood friend encounters her right in front of her own grave and freaks out, kickstarting the plot as he tries to figure out who, when, and HOW this even happened while Hiro keeps her mouth shut due to her own trauma, the struggle of realizing that everything that you were once familiar with and called home had changed drastically including the people you once knew cause they're now middle-age adults, and just overall figuring out if she even belongs in this new era or not despite coming from a past long since gone. Which she is dealing with all at once, with the depression and anxiety just a cherry on top behind her attempts to remain positive to an almost toxic extent (unless she's with Mari). It doesn't mean her cheerfulness is a complete facade, most of it can be genuine when she's taking things slow and can actually be very fascinated with the new technology that's surrounding her. It's just! A lot! To take in at once! To the point that she can sometimes feel a little bit alienated around others, including kids that are suppose to be her age.
Hiro is still an 80s kid before her death. She does not know what a smartphone is.
Due to the state of her own body, a.k.a. being a ghost, when Hiro used the Brooch of Life, it had to create an entirely new body of hers by scratch, which included the same clothes she had died in but without the dirt and scratches. So now there are two of her own bodies that exist in this world: the one that is buried in her grave that has long since decayed over the years, and the one she has now. As a result, Hiro is in a state of being alive but also dead. She can now grow older, which is what she wanted as she wanted to grow up and experience what it's like to be a teenager and an adult, something she never had the chance to do. But she also still has her ghost powers, from small bits of telekinesis to being able teleport (although this time she teleports through transforming into a swarm of butterflies and zipping over to the other side instant of being instantaneous) except for possession. There are also some side effects like her reproductive organs not functioning at all, something she learns much later down her life as a teenager. She's...actually upset about this since the thought of having her own family one day has crossed her mind a lot in her new life, so finding out that she can't have kids period was a gut punch to her. She's otherwise healthy, sure, but...that's cold comfort to her.
Her butterflies are parts of her soul, and she can "split" one off of her to fly into a location she can't appear in as herself. As a result, she can survey the nearby area, mapping it all out and eavesdropping on certain conversations without no one noticing. As long as they're not sensitive to the supernatural, at least...
Because these butterflies are a part of her soul, she has to bring those butterflies back to her body. If something were to happen to that butterfly, such as being crushed, she will feel the pain as if someone had actually attacked her physical body. Her body is actually quite fragile due to her state of being both alive and dead at the same time, so any pain or injuries she's sustained can easily become life-threatening.
It's a good thing that she has Mari with her, then, as they would more than willingly protect her with their life. However, after the incident with Tomomi and Hiro, and the Taint on their body, Mari has been struggling very hard to keep themselves in check. They are now paranoid of any threat that may be posed to Hiro, becoming overprotective of her and even becoming downright threatening with the intent of murder if someone so much as go near her. They want to keep their promise to Hiro, they really do. But due to their lack of experience and knowledge around humans outside of Hiro and Tomomi's memories, ones that are constantly overshadowed by their own deaths by a single man, they struggle to trust anyone at all except Hiro. Hiro recognizes that they're doing their best to help support and entertain her, though, and so she does her best to be patient, even when she's uncomfortable of the signs she sees in her friend.
Mari has the same powers as Hiro has, although they can actually teleport without needing to transform into something else, it's more or less instantaneous for them. This also includes her Time powers as they have inherited part of her soul (and Tomomi's when he had taken control of them), and can both rewind and freeze time like Hiro can. However, like Hiro, they cannot rewind time beyond an hour and can only freeze time for a minute. But unlike Hiro, they are far more creative in the use of this power, especially when in battle. And they can get quite merciless...unless they're in the mood to toy with their prey.
Yeah, prey. Due to the taint that Mari has, they are in danger of bursting into a demon. They're able to keep things the taint at bay for the time being, but they won't deny that the thought of gaining souls to become more powerful to protect Hiro isn't...tempting. But they know better than that. They know.
The butterfly pin Hiro has on her flat cap actually came from Mari. They totally didn't steal it.
Her new body also ended up being slightly different as the other half of her heritage becomes more apparent in her slightly pointed ears, her golden eyes that look a lot more like a clock, and the horns on her head. Yeah, she's not just wearing her hat for sentimental reasons, it's also to make sure no one sees the horns she has as she doesn't want to risk being made fun of or worse, be demonized. She's very uncomfortable about them as she doesn't know what to make of her new appearance anymore, wondering if this is what she gets for letting her brother go as far as he did...(She does not know that her grandfather and her father isn't human at this point...at least, not yet.) She also has a ton of scars on her body due to her past deaths and the reminders aren't! Great! She's really not happy with her body, but her friends don't judge her at all, simply expressing empathy for everything she's been put through. Hiro eventually comes to accept that this is what her body is now.
The reason why she comes off as creepy to others isn't because she is, but because the people she's trying to reach out to that are even remotely familiar with her are freaking out on the inside when they see their childhood friend, who's suppose to be dead, pop out of nowhere into their lives. Showing up at her own grave the very same day you were going to visit her with flowers? Oh God, I either finally snapped and started hallucinating or the supernatural IS real, time to run! Showing up at an author meet and greet and seeing her in the crowd, scanning a copy of her book that isn't really meant for kids? Very creepy as you try to act natural even when she asks questions when it's her turn to talk to you! Seeing her at a bridge with her against the railing while you're walking home? Okay, to be fair, that's a lot less creepy and more like, "Are you okay, kid?", even when there are alarm bells ringing in your head as you question if that's even your old friend or someone else entirely. Those are essentially the thoughts that are going through her three childhood friends' heads, and you can't really blame them since, uh, the dead aren't suppose to come back to life and they're not even sure if she's even the same Hiroko Arai they knew and cared about as kids. They do eventually get their answer as Hiro is indeed the same Hiro as before, but they were definitely trying to wrack their brains over what the hell is happening at the start since they don't know any of the context Hiro has, and Hiro hasn't exactly been open about it due to...everything she's dealing with right now. So at the start of story, the three of them get together, alongside Hiro who keeps insisting that she tags along despite them trying to tell her that they're doing "grown-up" things, start their investigations on the past, the murders, and what kind of insane supernatural things are going on right now, reforming their old bonds in the process as our main POV character has isolated himself from the friends he had left due to losing his best friends to the murderer, among other things.
I'm also just a sucker for the "grumpy middle-age adult that begrudgingly takes care of a sad child and the two of them healing over time together" except this time, it's an entire friend group pitching in to co-parent this child together, who also just so happened to be an old friend of theirs from way back then that came back from the dead.
One of the old friends 100% does the "board with red string" meme at some point.
While we never got around to finishing the stories we had planned out back then, I always saw the themes of this AU as, "Actions have consequences, ones that may end up affecting newer generations as time goes on," "don't let the past define you but also don't abandon it and pretend that it didn't happen," and, "breaking the cycle can be hard, but worth the effort for those you love and yourself, as you deserve a happier, healthier life like anyone else." A lot of shit may happen in these stories, especially to the characters...but they do get a happy ending out of all this, or at least a bittersweet one where everything isn't perfect, but they can still move forward to a new future together.
And with that, I'm finally done talking about Hiro. *lays down* I tried to cut down on my rambling but I have clearly failed on that. I clearly have a lot to say about Hiro, even now, and I do genuinely want good things for her. She's such a sweet kid that just doesn't know what the best course of action is, knowing something wrong but eventually growing scared of confrontation as she believes speaking up would only worsen her relationship with others. Even though it's not even her fault, some people simply won't stop until it's too late or never learn. She and Tomomi was essentially my version of the ghost kid(s) that haunted Marionette back when I first joined my friends on their little FNAF AU. And I think that was around when FNAF 4 came out. There's a lot to adjust for the story to separate itself from FNAF but I think I'm satisfied with what I came up with and shared for now.
Here's Hiro's design, btw.
Honestly, it's about time I shared this art of her. It's old but I still love how her design turned out...even if it's not completely accurate to the time period she came from but shhh. She gets to be cute and happy here. She needs that positivity in her life. Let's hope it doesn't border on toxic positivity. ^^;
OCs are a funny thing where you start off with this initial idea that you're pretty down for, but as you develop them a bit more and maybe even sit down to design them, you realize that they're giving off a different vibe or you come up with a different idea that seems more suitable for character. Bonus points if this is an old OC that you had when you were younger and they end up changing a lot over the years as you grow older and become more mature as both a person and a creator.
This is kinda what happened with my OC, Hiro, as she used to be this creepy kid that came back from the dead after a few decades and was okay with murder as a form of justice. But nowadays she's a kid that comes off as creepy when in reality she's just a depressed kid that's desperately in need of help and support in a time where everything had changed since she's been dead for a few decades and is struggling to adjust to the modern setting after reviving herself. And she hates murder in general now. Her concept was still technically the same, it's just the surrounding details about her that changed a lot.
(Interesting to know that Hitaru was going to be a lot more spoiled and like her parents since she's never been abused like the rest of her siblings. It would certainly hammer home the idea of continuing the cycle one way or another, but I like who Hitaru is now. She's so sweet and I wanted to destroy Mrs. Nijiue SO BADLY the more I learned about her and her husband.)
THAT'S LIKE,, THE FUNNIEST INSTANCES OF THIS HAPPENING the oc does a 180 and becomes the complete opposite of the idea you crested them for in the first place, absolutely insane.
Yeah if i had kept her as an asshole it would show how sometimes the cycle just can't be broken but i think she's much more interesting the way she is not because it's surprising? In a way? Like, this is the oldest of the Nijiue siblings and the one born with a natural talent for arts so you'd expect that she would be treated the best by the parents and take after them due to that but Hitaru has it just as badly as her siblings and took it upon herself to not be like the parents and help them in the only ways she could while being in such a terrible situation. It's a nice break of expectations i think
Akemi also charger quite a bit from my original idea for the character, she was a lot meane when i first created her for voidswap, but then Mod Bubbles picked the siblings up for Asoot and it lef to her becoming a much nicer and nuanced character which is really cool because i think that's the first time an oc of mine changed because of my friend's ideas rather than something stemming solely from me so that's fun
I guess we could include Beni in this list too, but also not really? Because Beni herself really hasn't had major changes to her character ever since creation, she's remained largely the same, i just added more and more stuff to her
Even her design has been pretty much the same ever since this first sketch lmao
The thing is that before she came into my mind i had this different idea for a character which was this girl who woked at the foundation's police division alongside Ryutaro and Keisuke and she was this scaredy cat type character that was always stressed and hated her job, but I wasn't super into the idea and the design i had in mind just looked a lot like Maki + i wanted someone that could have some form of connection to the Dra so cue to me remembering Kanata had a younger siblings and coming up with Beni after i checked the list just to be sure
(Also dude do you have posts of any kind about Hiro and whatever world she comes from? It's such an interesting concept I'd love to hear more about it 👀)
#Hiroko Arai (OC)#Hiro (OC)#OC Hiroko Arai#I do like where you took with Hitaru as yeah it did definitely subvert expectations#sometimes when it comes to fiction you kinda just assume there's at least one sibling that's on the “side of the parents”#since they apparently didn't have it as bad as the others#and I love how she tries so hard to be better than her parents#Ohhh interesting bit about Akemi#me and my friend(s) discuss OCs a lot to the point that it becomes a melting pot of ideas to see which sticks or doesn't#I'm more than happy to help them develop their characters and it's cool to know how Akemi became more nuance to a buddy#and then there's the character that barely changed at all#I love Beni and I love learning more about her#the concept before you came up with Beni is an interesting idea but if it's not hitting for you it's not hitting you know?#some concepts just don't see the light of day since you're not as enthused about them as you thought you'd be#but yeah I hope you enjoyed reading about Hiro's story. it's something that's been around since my high school days.#and probably needs some more woodworking done since I'm trying to go for a more original route for her story instead of being a fandom OC
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How I push through writing when I don't feel like writing.
Here are some of the techniques that I use to help me write more often or more consistantly when my laziness/depression/anxiety starts to take over.
I watch TV. I don't do it with the purpose of zoning out though. I watch something popular and well-liked such as the LOR or Harry Potter to get new ideas on how I can develop my story and apply their in-depth world-building ideas to help develop mine. Without plagarizing of course!!!!
Zoning out and daydreaming. As I have mentionned before, daydreaming is a huge part of my story outlining and world-building process. I'll stand in the shower, or take a walk and think about how my charcaters would act/react/behave in situations, mundane or not. Doing this gives me a better sense of my characters, and sometimes gives me ideas for scenes I use later on.
Work on writing related projects. These work well at keeping me distracted while still being productive on my writing goals. Example, I have one story I am working now, I made a new language (alphabet and numbers included) to include as a cool and fun component for the book. So, at times when I don't wan't to write, I continue creating the dictionary (very fun, 8/10 would recommend). Also, for the same book, my characters don't work off the Georigian calendar and 24 hour clock, so I've been working at creating a new calendar (harder than it seems, 2.5/10 dont recommend). These are side projects that help my story, without having to write.
Reading. You saw this one coming, I know. Reading is great, especially when you're editing, your writing style will unconsciously change to be more similar the author you were just reading. Also, most importantly, I'll be reading and think, "this story is really good, but you know what story I like even better? Mine." then change to writing.
This one is my biggest life saver!! I learnt about a year ago that sometimes I'll get bored of writing a story, and have difficulty keeping on track. That's why I finished my first book in 2016 and just started editing the first draft last week. The solution for me was to work on multiple projects at once, because it was much harder to be bored of multiple stories. I stick to 2, but will sometimes add a third. This is easy for me, because I have a list of over a dozen series I want to write. Don't abandon one project for another, use them as a distraction/ motivation for each other, so you're always furthering at least one project. I've never heard someone say, "oh no, i accidentally worked on this other writing project for three months instead of the other writing project I was doing. Dammit." No, we're just happy we have written something. Be sure to have well outlined story lines before starting, don't just start writing randomly or you'll reach a point where you don't know where to go from there.
Author/ writer projects. Maybe this is building a following, or community to share your projects and engage with. Tumblr, Insta, Reddit, whatever it is. My hope this year is to start up my website to offer publishing services (editing, graphic design, short writing courses) and build a following as a writer. (See what I did there? Never a bad time to self-promote ;) ) Having your own projects like this will help you in the future when you're going to try to publish and sell your books!
Talk with friends and a writing community. Never underestimate the passion that will burn inside you when talking about your story, or when others are talking about theirs. Surrounding yourself with a positive writing community can be the best thing for you as a writer.
Write or read (your story) every day. I'm not going to be one of those people that say you need to write 1000 words a day, that's a lot. But maybe try for 100? That could maybe only take 5 minutes, and at the end of the year that's still over 36 thousand words of a novel. Or just read your story, and I've always found it helped me get in the creative mood.
Make a playlist of songs that remind you of your characters, your story, or just puts you in the mood to write. Then play it ONLY when you're having trouble writing. Playing it while writing will not help, you'll get annoyed with the songs.
Just really can't do it today? That's okay, take a break. You deserve it. There's always tomorrow.
Does anyone else have ways they push themselves to keep writing? Let us know in the comments!
Happy Writing!
#novel writing#writer#author#wip#writing motivation#keep writing#writeblr#creative writing#writing advice#writing tips#writing is hard#writing help#fiction#writing fiction#writers community#how to write#writing blog#writing problems#writerscommunity#tumblr writers#writing
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hello! so, i currently have an oc in the works. i dont have much for his character yet, and hes kind of a blank slate at the moment, however, whilst trying to develop him i had the idea to give him a disability; its something i dont do with my characters very often, and i feel like it could give some depth and realism to his character. however, i..... dont know where to really start with it? i have the vague idea that i think id like him to have crutches, so some sort of leg disability, but just going off that its been hard for me to find any condition that feels quite right. im unsure about making him an amputee either; seemingly the "go to" for anyone who wants to make a physically disabled character. i want to try and represent a disability thats less fetishized by the general public, and looking through this blog here its definitely apparent that a lot of people are tired of seeing basic half amputee characters with overly functional prosthetics; i wanna avoid that. sorry this has gotten a bit rambly, but basically what im asking is,, do you have advice for what i could use as just. a general starting point in this? im terribly uneducated and lost at the moment and id love some help. thank you :]
Hi!
It's great that you're interested in writing a disabled character (with care)! I'm always happy to see more writers/artists/creatives do that.
You mentioned wanting to give him crutches, which is cool! Mobility aid users in media make me happy. However, you mentioned crutches as meaning a leg disability, which isn't always the case — and while I don't have statistics on it, I believe that most crutch users do not use them for leg-only problems, and a lot of them have the not-so-fetishized conditions. Here are some suggestions of what you could give your character, which hopefully gives you some ideas. If you need, you can get back to us with a more specific question after you figure out what exactly your character has! :-) (smile)
Cerebral palsy — probably the most common reason for using crutches in non-elderly people, and the most common (physical) disability in younger people in general. If your character has diplegic (meaning lower limbs affected) CP, he could use crutches and if he has hemiplegic (one arm and one leg affected) CP, then he could use a single crutch or a cane. Cerebral palsy is generally extremely underrepresented when compared to how many people have it IRL! Just be aware that there is a lot of research involved just about the condition itself — multiple types (spastic/ataxic/dyskinetic), different kinds of body involvement, tons of different mobility aids and orthotics to learn about. There is also hereditary spastic paraplegia, which is not the same as CP but similar and progressive.
Spinal cord injury — the general assumption is that all people with spinal cord injuries are fully paralyzed below the neck or waist, and that's not the case. If your character has an incomplete SCI on any level or just a very low level injury, he could be using crutches or switch between a wheelchair and crutches. It's essential to research SCIs to have them be more than “legs don't work, but that's literally it”. SCI can come with severe nerve pain, spasticity, atrophy, and a lot of other things. Worth noting that spinal cord injury could be traumatic, but could also be congenital (spina bifida) or illness related (polio, transverse myelitis, spinal stroke, or cancer, for example). You could think that it's overrepresented in media, but SCI is generally just used as a “default condition” for why a character is in a wheelchair, and a lot of these representations are unfortunately very shallow.
Paralysis — in the monoplegic sense here. Much more rare than the rest of the things here, but your character could have a single paralyzed leg, largely due to nerve damage. Could be traumatic or illness-related (e.g., cancer, infection, or multiple sclerosis).
Stroke (and other traumatic/acquired brain injuries) — stroke can cause a million different symptoms and depending on what happens to your character exactly, he might need crutches! A big portion of stroke survivors deal with hemiplegia and could use a crutch on their non-affected side, for example. Some kinds of stroke might cause your character to have troubles with balance and require a mobility aid to not fall. Of course stroke will also cause other symptoms for your character (it wouldn't be too realistic to only have him have problems with his legs) for example speech issues, headaches, or seizures. Stroke can happen to anyone, and it wouldn't be weird to have a younger character with it. Very common in real life but very rarely represented in fiction.
Limb difference — you can definitely write a character with a limb difference or an amputation without fetishizing it! The main concern with the fetishization is the concept of the robotic limb that works just as well as or even better than a meat leg, and thus the character is “fixed”. But your character could just… not use a prosthetic. A lot of congenital amputees, people with limb differences, or with high level (above knee) amputations might do that. He could also have a leg length difference, which could cause him to need crutches (for example, Morteza Mehrzad has one of his legs significantly shorter after a pelvic injury, and he uses crutches among other mobility aids).
Chronic pain — very broad category for too many specific conditions to count. Neuropathy in the legs and/or lower back could be a reason for using crutches, for example. Unhealed, or poorly healed past injuries. Arthritis in knees or hips. Hypermobility that makes him unsteady or dislocate joints. Pain in bones or muscles where he can't fully weight-bear.
Gait disorders — another broad category (sorry). Your character could have problems with his gait and need aids for that. It could be caused by dyspraxia (I have it), ataxia, progressive muscular dystrophy (there is a lot of different types), Parkinson's disease, or a lot of other things! Could also be injury related.
And of course you could have multiple characters that are disabled to make sure that there is some variety :)
I hope that the above list gave you some ideas for your character :-) (smile) if you have more questions, feel free to send another ask
mod Sasza
#anonymous#mod sasza#mobility aids#crutches#disabled character ideas#writing advice#writing disabled characters
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Am I the only one who is disappointed with Caitvi in season two? When I watched the first season I had the biggest caitvi brain rot because they actually gave me SUCH a fun dynamic with them. Buddy cop Caitvi was hilarious, I loved that so so much!
And season 2 started of strong imo but then it rushed through everything. I loved the scene in the cell, obviously, but it was misplaced. Your sister is about to kill herself girl what are you doing this is not the time!! And other than romantic and sexual tension there wasn't all that much left of their previous dynamic aside from the brief scene in episode six...
Idk, I think I'm just annoyed. Usually when I see a non canon gay ship get more traction than the Canon lesbian couple, I just assume it's misogyny or lesbophobia, and move on with my life. But I can't even do that here because Caitvi was WAY more popular in season 1 (as they should).
Jayvik isn't getting somewhat more popular in season 2 because people don't like lesbians, but because their arcs are connected so strongly to each other. (Also I'm not saying that Jayvik is now more popular than Caitvi, but it's like a graph where the super high stocks caitvi are still even while Jayvik is skyrocketing rn)
Wanna know why Jayvik wasn't all that popular in season 1? Because (after act 1) their arcs were mostly separate, safe for a couple of moments. Viktor worked on his body and Jayce was doing politics.
Caitlyn and Vis arcs intertwined more, they actually did shit together and it was beautiful, funny, romantic, EVERYTHING!
Also a fun opposites attract buddy cop dynamic is also just more fun than men who do science together (in my personal opinion)
Now let's look at Caitlyn and Vis relationship in season two.
It starts of strong. I momentarily thought that Caitlyn was uncharacteristically mean to Vi when she refused to become an enforcer, but she apologized for it later and I recognized the fact that Caitlyn was grieving. Then once we get to episode two and three I could already feel their relationship being a bit more odd. The kiss (though I cheered) didn't feel right. I felt like something was missing, and that was their chemistry from season one. Also I feel like we glossed over too many decisions that Caitlyn made, and I think Vi should've put a stop to it sooner. But overall I was okay with them in act 1.
Then we had a timeskip and the two were fully separated. Act 2 literally started with Caitlyn in bed with another woman, like we can see they're not together anymore. Caitlyn has obviously changed, there is not much of the sweet cupcake left that we had come to love in season 1, and Vi is boxing and getting drunk.
Then they meet and like... Vi calls Cait cupcake, and Cait switches sides IMMEDIATELY? GIRL WTF?!
I get that Caitlyn wasn't entirely on Ambessas side the entire time, but I had hoped for more drama first. So you're telling me the very next interaction the two have after their heart wrenching falling out is them making up again? Come on.
Then we had act 3 and overall it was better I think but the timing of their hot scene in the cell was just odd, like what about your sister about to kill herself? I was very happy and hyped in the moment but then I realized how rushed this was. Why? Why make em fuck right here? And in the final act, the two weren't together because again, their arcs were not as connected. And that's actually pretty cool to have a couple who do their own things! But it doesn't help their relationship when they, in turn, aren't given enough time to develop as a pair!
I feel like season 1 did this incredible job of setting these characters up, showing us why they work so well together and why they would fall for one another. And season 2 gave us pay off for it but with very little set up, which was needed because of how Cait changed throughout the season. I don't mention Vi here because she did not change. She had her drunk boxing phase, which we got nothing but a montage off, but everything else is basically season 1 Vi aside from very few things here and there. Like her becoming an enforcer wasn't a character change for Vi, her finally letting go of powder and calling her sister Jinx, wasn't a big character moment for Vi, they were pay off for a set up we didn't get enough of.
SO TO GET TO MY POINT:
S2 was rushed. We should've AT LEAST gotten 3 seasons, like minimum, because there was a whole lot of plot and very little moments in between for characterization. Especially for Caitlyn and Vi and their relationship to each other.
I still generally prefer Caitvi to Jayvik, but only because of season 1. Season 2 gave me the two things I wanted most (a sexy scene and a kiss) but forgot to give me the things that made me fall in love with this ship in the first place.
Which was the hilarious buddy cop dynamic of rich girl cop Cait, and broke butch prisoner Vi.
#arcane#arcane s2#caitvi#jayvik#caitlyn kiramman#arcane vi#It's not that I dislike Caitvi now. I just think they could've given us more#Season 2 was very entertaining and artistically beautiful#But it wasn't the masterpiece that season 1 was#arcane critical#arcane criticism
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It didn't have to be you.
I'm not just okay with it, I actually really like the fact that the Warrior of Light and their companions take a more supporting role in Dawntrail. I enjoyed the Scions' role in the story and was happy to see all my faves onscreen, I just didn't mind them taking the backseat to some new characters. I really loved Wuk Lamat and also enjoyed Erenville and Koana and Bakool Ja Ja and even Zoraal Ja as a villain a great deal. But it's more than just the fact that I loved the new characters and the focus on developing them and their setting.
So much of the Warrior of Light's story has been about... the burdens of being the Warrior of Light. How awful and exhausting and isolating and even depersonalizing it can be to be the only one who can solve the problem, again and again and again. It's such a thing in ARR that the patches kind of lampshade the dehumanization your character faces, the way the Scions kind of take the WoL for granted early on, something I've written about before. It's still present as late as Shadowbringers, being a major point of that story's plot that only the Warrior of Light can do this thing, and they very nearly die as a result. This theme finally finds its resolution in Endwalker when you meet Hydaelyn face to face, you learn of the promise made in another time, you learn why it had to be you.
That story arc is finished now. You've done what only you could do. You know why you were the Warrior of Light. If you were at Carteneau, you know why you survived and came back. You know why Hydaelyn had to keep you alive, even as so many of your friends died around you. (That last thing in particular is such a major part of Ariane's story arc; it's the central thing she's wrestling with in the fic I'm currently working on, so it was at the forefront of my mind playing Dawntrail.)
It doesn't have to be you anymore.
That's not a downside for me. That is the appeal. It felt so appropriate to me after the tremendously heavy, world-ending stakes of Endwalker. My character could be invested without everything riding on her shoulders. She could help, voluntarily (in-universe, obviously the game asks you to accept this premise in order to like, play it), without everyone looking to her and going, "Well, it has to be you, so you'll do it, right?" In fact, had that continued, it wouldn't have felt right to me. It would have felt like it undid some of the narrative and thematic closure that Endwalker offered.
So this felt like the natural progression of the Warrior of Light's role in the story following Endwalker to me, and I thought it worked for the story, while allowing me to still feel invested and see a cool new setting and meet some great new characters.
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Wonderlust theory thoughts !! Just finished the first episode :D (these are very disorganized but we just roll with it)
Troy's first bit is pretty cut-and-dried as far as I can tell, it's very much to show the character in his natural habitat, but we'll probably get more context as the series goes on!
Aside from the character, THE STEAMPUNK VIBES ARE SO COOL AAAHHH!! Using flipbooks as play-by-plays? Whatever that interview camera thing was? Using "cogs" as currency?!? YES PLEASE
Also, I see you May. Where were you going so quickly :eyes:
Runt and the street rats are so interesting to me,,, my first thought was "oh there's poor people even in the 'utopia'", but then they actually were stealing from uplanders iirc!
This implies that Doppler + the gang have some way to get up above, without running into the clockwork soldiers. That will definitely be relevant later.
Also it might end up being important who exactly it was that they were stealing medicine from
Come to think of it, why is it always medicine that's being stolen/transported? It could just be a way to show that the characters are kind and care about others, or it could be emphasizing a deep flaw in the system Reclaim runs on...
side note that moment when runt saw the moon and went "how'd they make that".... ough. I don't think that adds a dimension to the worldbuilding other than the character detail of "SHE'S NEVER SEEN THE MOON BEFORE and most people here probably haven't either", but wow, way to emotionally destroy me with a single throwaway line grizzlyplays
More steampunk gadgets yaaayyy! so far between the clockwork soldiers and the mites, all the security measures up above seem like they go WAY TOO HARD. Is it a way to control people through fear? Do they secretly know there's a whole society underneath? Is it to protect something, maybe those purple stones? Is it just the person making them being unconcerned if people die at their hands? I'm so sure this means something (<-"troy's dad is a villain" truther)
Blink's turn! This man has SO many secrets and I can't wait to learn all of them. What was his relationship to Aeon? Why is he here now? Why is he on the run?
More specifically, he said something to- maybe shopkeeper guy-? about how he can't stop helping people. It sounded like a personal-promise-slash-oath kind of thing. He's clearly already been through character development; in his conversation with Aeon neither of them were happy about how the other has "changed"... that's so fascinating to me, is he a paladin? He does this out of the goodness of his heart, sure, but he sure talks like he's at least emotionally bound to it. What could have happened to cause his adamance that helping people is the right thing to do, and that Aeon isn't doing that?
Speaking of Aeon, I 100% agree with the person that said she got to Troy first. It did strike me as suspicious that he had a whole chase scene with Blink Specifically and not anyone else
From what I caught, the vixens are pretty much the self-imposed policemen/tax collectors of Reclaim! I wonder what the general public thinks of them...
that's all I can think of at the moment! let me know if anything on here has been proven or disproven because I tend to ignore the very obvious details for the character/worldbuilding ones LOL
#jrwi wonderlust#troy lougferd#jrwi blink#jrwi runt#the rare original post from ak saltedcaramelchaos?!
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dw empire of death
spoilers ofc
hm. like many RTD finales, a bit of a mixed bag. i feel less certain of my overall thoughts than last week (which i thought was a blast, tbh).
the good: i'm... pretty happy with the ruby mom reveal. this whole mystery box set up turning out to be "she was just a scared young woman who couldn't raise her baby", an ordinary woman mythologized by ruby and the doctor over the season, etc, is an extremely RTD solution. and as a fan of his stuff I liked seeing that... well... pivot to his roots as opposed to her being part of the pantheon or something (which I admit I did wonder about myself).
the *idea* of her pointing at the sign to name the baby is nice, I like the meaning of it and what Ruby takes from it, but it is a bit of a clumsy set up. very dramatic pointing, ms miller.
also as much as i was dying to see what the screen said lol i DID love the character moment of ruby stepping forward to offer the name to sutekh, only to smash it, and then clip his collar (lmfao btw). i thought that was a nice character moment for ruby. in that moment i thought perhaps we'd never find out the answer, and that would be something ruby sacrificed for the greater good. i wasn't sure how satisfying that would be and I guess I'll never have to find out bc it's not what happened lmao, but it is where i thought we might be headed.
i liked seeing the gloves and the rope from TCORR come back. i like surprise tools that will help us later :)
loved the memory tardis from the time window and the use of that tales from the tardis set. how cool.
loved the time window playing clips of classic who that's so fun. mel's moment with six's outfit awwww. and i'm sure i missed some of the namedrops of planets etc that fifteen was going on about but i liked the ones i caught. shan-shen! oodsphere!!
i thought the effects of the dust wave and the insta-crumbling was pretty good and spooky
i really like having mel around! i hope we get to see her cameo again
the mixed bag:
'the death wave is eating memories and going back through family trees in reverse' is pretty cool as a concept, i thought. where i think this hurts the resolution a bit is that in the moment i thought, "ok, well, ruby's "safe" because there's the Mystery, there's no family tree for it to climb!" but like... there was. does sutekh need to personally be aware of your family tree to kill you?
i really liked the moment of fifteen and ruby watching louise outside the coffee shop, and i really liked the moment where ruby sits down across from her and then the barista calls the name ruby and they have this look. i ... kind of found myself wishing that it would stop there? i mean, i'm happy for ruby, and i think "ruby found her bio fam and now ruby and her big family are together" is a nice ending for the character. but there was something so emotional and bittersweet about that split second of wondering and connection between the two, and ruby having that choice to make...
the goodbye between ruby and fifteen was lovely. millie gibson is so good her big watery eyes make me so sad. i've enjoyed the two of them together and i think they have incredible chemistry as characters and actors, like, what a team of besties. i'll miss ruby on the TARDIS. but ... only 10 episodes, a couple of which didn't feature them much at all... a bond that didn't get super developed on screen ... I dunno. Left me wishing we got more from them through the season.
I do know we'll see more of Ruby next season, so I'm excited for that. an s4 Martha situation. but then I also worry about Varada Sethu's character getting development time too...
the not so good:
killing off rose, kate, etc in the first minute removes stakes, because while you might worry about characters like cherry or carla who won't necessarily stick around when ruby leaves or whose deaths will impact ruby, you know rose and kate are not going to stay dead permanently. also very infinity war (derogatory) where there was the same issue -- no these characters won't stay dead and i'm not going to humour it lol
rose temple sweetie it was nice to see you stand in the background and not speak. what was that about. she FINALLY got all of two lines. it just felt like she didn't serve a lot of purpose in this ep. I mean I liked seeing her but she did not do anything to the story in either part of the ep
the solution of "death kills death" was a bit goofy lol but it's doctor who the solution is always goofy. i didn't care too much about that i guess. but it was goofy
i really think we could've used a more decisive scene with carla and ruby. carla seems to understand ruby's desire to know her bio fam and be supportive of it and that's lovely. obviously ruby loves carla and vice versa. but i think it would've been nice to have a moment of on-screen explicit acknowledgment between carla and ruby that there might be weird feelings there, that louise isn't replacing carla, something like that.
related to the above, the Doctor says Ruby redefined the way he thinks of family, which is a huge thing to say, but I don't feel like I ever saw that happening on screen. it COULD have. all the pieces are there with foundlings and foster care and adoption...
#doctor who#dw spoilers#i start every post like 'i don't have much to say' 5000 words later#empire of death
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Voiceplay Visuals - Party Of Your Lifetime
Man I'm so happy to have one more video to visually dissect and delve into before the year ends! I really do enjoy making these posts!
VoicePlay's cover of Party Of Your Lifetime was released on the 13th of December, 2024 (or the 14th of December if you live somewhere like New Zealand, or Australia like myself). This was done in collaboration with the developers of the videogame Warframe, who reached out to VoicePlay after seeing and loving their cover of Sleeping In The Cold Below, another Warframe song. This song, however, is not a space shanty like SitCB was, but instead a song "performed" by the in-universe 90s-style boy band "On Lyne", whom VoicePlay are basically portraying for this video!
Many other things to say, (and if you wanna wanna hear my thoughts on just the vocals/arrangement/music, go HERE), but it's time for me to rewatch the video and start grabbing screenshots! Lets Get Into This!
I wasn't prepared for the "ad" at the start, ngl 😂
(Also in case you don't know the On Lyne band members, Geoff is Zeke (and Zeke is Geoff), Eli is Packet, Layne is Harddrive, Omar is DJ RoM, and Cesar is Drillbit)
"BIG BYTES PIZZAAAA!" (god they're such dorks, I love them)
Actually I might as well spend a bit of time talking about their clothing now, since there's gonna be even more costuming (and makeup) stuff to talk about quite shortly.
Geoff is wearing a key around his neck again! (Idk whether it's got any story significance or just meant to be a 90s fashion thing, but this is like the third or fourth time Geoff has worn a key necklace for a video if you count both VoicePlay's channel and his). Eli's got glasses on again! (First time since 2022 if you don't count Jingle Bell Rock or the Jump In The Line Mini). Also I like Cesar's necklace! (It's part of the character look)
(Also I kinda love the "a memory in every byte/bite" tagline)
I'm a little sad that the CDs they're using have the original On Lyne visual graphics, i.e. before Zeke's design got updated (to look more like Geoff), but oh well.
...I'm Sure It's Fine. Nothing to worry about, guys!
(Also fun fact: part of that was done in editing of course, but part of that was also just done by Kathy off to the side flicking the light switch off and on again! 😆)
Now we get to the bit that was seen in the teaser video! (And man I hope I don't hit image limit!)
It does bug me just a tiny bit that there are four spotlights in the back and not five, but oh well, teensy nitpick, it's not really that big of a deal.
Actually, while I'm talking about lights, I gotta shoutout Eli as usual, but also a guy by the name of Anthony Baldwin for both working on lighting design!
Lights up! I'll get to costuming again in a moment, but let's talk about set design!
I didn't actually fully register it until I was watching the BTS, but the floor is wet! (Or like a thin layer of water mopped over it anyway). Like with VP's Running Up That Hill video, it gives a cool (and even creepy/otherworldly) vibe to the scene thanks to the reflection effect, but I guess it also helps with some of the footwork, like doing easy spins and stuff (but be careful not to slip!)
There's also empty pizza boxes strewn around (shoutout to Kathy for doing a lot of work with those!), and there's even a metal lighting rig(?) thing at the back left of the shot that's tipped over in a way that implies that stuff has been wrecked!
(Oh boy getting clear screenshots from this is gonna be a Challenge huh).
Okay so like all of the guys' outfits are visibly dirtier and "tattier" than they were in the intro clip (more indication of whatever infection/infestation they've fallen victim to). But like while the others have clothes that are like moth-eaten, or have small holes, or rips in the hem and sleeves and stuff, Mister Geoffrey Castellucci has now had his shirt ripped open all the way down to his midriff/stomach area. I literally had to pause a couple of times to be like "wait are my eyes deceiving me?" No. No they were not. (definitely a "new record" for a YouTube video!)
Anyway the design thing on his forehead is cool, if you look past the fact that it makes it look like he's got no eyebrows!
Oooh I like this shot. Also maybe the four background spotlights are alright after all without needing a fifth.
This video was directed by both Layne and Tony (Tony helped out a lot with choreography and stage direction during the shoot), and Layne also did the arrangement for this one (though Eli is also credited with "additional arranging", funnily enough)
Even when infected/infested, Cesar continues to slay! Love the lipstick, love the fishnet arm thing! Also his left eye looks kinda purple in this shot and I'm guessing it's just the lighting, but it could be a contact lens, idk
Look how cool Eli looks! He had a relatively simple outfit compared to the other guys, but I guess that just means more to work with for the "post-transformation" stage! Look at the things on his shirt! (Claws? Plant tendrils? Alien things? Idk!) And the designs on his head!
Here's where I give credit where credit is due to Rick Underwood and Renette Feren, but also a woman named Jacqueline Coleman, as all three of them helped with makeup and prosthetics for this one! And of course Rick and Renette always do a stunning job.
The very first hint that any of us got pertaining to what VoicePlay was up to was when Omar posted on his Insta story when he was getting this makeup/face stuff put on him! Some people thought it looked kinda dragon-y, and yeah it still does! Like half a face of dragon scales! Cool!
Cool brief black-and-white "glitch" with distortion effect!
Okay but why does that picture low-key have such a vibe to it honestly
And can't forget a couple shots of Layne! He's got a kinda sorta "dragon-scales" thing on his face too, but yellow and wrapping from one cheek to another, up over his forehead (and blocking his eyebrows like with Geoff's face thing)
Oh I like that shot actually
(He's not getting a "he's so pretty" for this one, but I will give a heart emoji! 💜)
"DJ spins the track!"
Eli going over to Layne as Layne imitates being a "disc jockey" and doing the kinda record-scratch movements was honestly kinda cute? Also funny because the "DJ" of the group is DJ RoM, who's being portrayed by Omar, but of course Layne is your best bet for being able to make all those turntable noises by himself!
Omar does a very smooth spin on "the boys are in sync...", and in fact you can briefly see a bit of water 'splash' out from his feet as he does so!
A better shot of the side of Cesar's face! Also lighting colour change for the bridge(?) section!
Omar still has his portable CD player that he had in the intro clip, love that.
Also this is a better shot of some of the dirt, rips, and tears in some of the guys' clothing (but no one got a super low v-neck except Geoff, pfft)
...Alright fine, he's so pretty!!
I guess once you've seen videos like Thriller and Classical Chaos and Kidnap The Sandy Claws and stuff, makeup looks like this really aren't too hard to "get used to". (Also is it weird of me to say that the yellow-green stuff on his forehead kinda brings out his eyes a little bit?)
(And I can tell by the glimpse of the two necklace chains I see here that Geoff is, as always, still wearing the necklace that he always wears as well as the key necklace! <3)
Okay that's definitely a coloured contact lens
Does this count as an old-timey video effect? I think it does - I'm gonna have to start a running tally for VoicePlay videos honestly (and/or an idea for a new screenshot compilation maybe?)
Wait is Geoff doing air bass guitar?
And the screen closes back in for the end pose! (Also rip Geoff being the one most in shadow)
And that's Party Of Your Lifetime! Honestly it's just a really fun video with a really upbeat, energetic song, and I'm so happy for VoicePlay that they got this cool opportunity! They deserve all the recognition and more!
Got plenty more stuff lined up for this blog before Christmas, but in terms of visual analysis, that's it till January at earliest! Until next time!
#voiceplay#geoff castellucci#layne stein#eli jacobson#cesar de la rosa#omar cardona#voiceplay party of your lifetime#voiceplay visuals#acaplaya analysis
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Hi kokonut
First of all, I'd like to thank you for your analysis and recaps on Lawbin interactions and similarities.
I enjoyed them so much. I SHIP THEM HARD.
I started reading One Piece because of Ms All Sunday at the time. You know she looked so badass with the outfit, stoic/stern luck, and her DF abilities. I was Luffy and his nakama's age at the time and when she joined I was like: "Wow, Robin's so much older and mature, a woman in her late 20s. How does it feel to be that mature?"
Now, I am even older than her :))). (I'm old, I know)
I'll try organizing my thoughts chronogically. This might be long as NR and One Piece and I go way back to my adolescent years.
- So yeah, I have been a Robin fan since way back. One Piece wasn't as popular and access to manga was not easy. I saved One Piece chapters on floppy diskettes of 1.44 MB capacity (those were the dark ages). I had nobody around me to talk about One Piece and Nico Robin even searched for a mailing list and sent a cold email to a stranger just to search for someone to talk about Nico Robin/Miss All sunday lol.
- I was much younger so what I cared about mostly was just badassery and her being cool and strong. I got really worried and sad when Robin was frozen by Aokiji and she was a "burden" to her nakama. But then came Water 7 and Enies Lobby arc which were Robin's arc and full of Robin which made me really happy. Robin's outfit from back then is still the best Robin outfit for me.
- I was not very much and is still not into character ships. I've seen some Zoro x Robin and Franky x Robin ships since back then. I read the reason why people match them but I wasn't convinced. I just didn't see it. (We'll get to Law and Law x Robin later)
- When the supernovas were introduced in Sabaody archipelago pre-time skip, Law stood out for me immediately upon his introduction. Most probably cause he was the only one that was directly mentioned by Robin to Luffy :)) Oh, and cause he had a unique name that made me curious.
- And then came the time skip. I was kind of "disappointed" when Robin was sent to Tequila wolf. You see all the straw hats went to unique islands and we knew what they were doing there (e.g. Luffy with the amazon lilies, nami studying weather) while Robin went to I am sorry be a slave at a random bridge??? And what the hell was she doing with the Revolutionaries? We know what the other Strawhats were doing during the timeskip but what she did during the timeskip was always vague.
- I was also rather disappointed with her design post timeskip in Sabaody archipelago :/ Where was the cowboy hat? Why the much "softer" clothes? Where was the full body leather dress as in Enies lobby?
- The last time I followed the chapters real time was at the beginning of Punk Hazard, Law hasn't even reappeared at that time. And then life happened: uni and work and life in general. I had other hobbies and interests too, I had minimal time to follow chapters per week with less motivation fueled by my "disappointment" about post timeskip Robin .
- So, I had around 10-12 years of One Piece hiatus. Now OP is VERY mainstream and accessible, so different compared to when I first read them 20 years ago. I decided to pick up where I left: beginning of Punk Hazard.
- Now that I am much older and mature with more of the story revealed, everything about Robin's character development makes sense to me:
How she's much more relaxed, and how it felt to not want to be a burden for others, how it's okay to ask for help (and that it's a very courageous thing to ask for help), and how she felt so happy Sanji asked her for help :')
- My disappointment about how she was sent to Tequila Wolf (and The Revolutionaries) has evaporated: Oda has tied her even further to the One Piece lore after all
- I mentioned that I've seen Frobin and Zorobin since way back then. Now I have a perspective of both a teenager me and much older me reading Nico Robin interact with other characters. I still do not see the appeal to those pairings. But when I read her interactions with Law, I immediately got: AHA!!! WHAT'S THIS?
- Now that I've caught up to all chapters (up to 1133 as of now). I SHIP THEM HARD. I'm squeezing years worth of Law x Robin obsession/admiration/hope in these recent weeks LOL. So glad that I found your blog so that I know I am not crazy and not alone in seeing the appeal of Law and Robin. Damn shipping in the fandom is so toxic these days.
- I agree with your writing about why you ship Law x Robin. Back in my younger days, the idea of opposite attracts appealed to me. But now that I'm much older and much overwhelmed with life, the meshing of personalities such as Law and Robin's what appeals and what makes sense to me. Both are introverts with quirks (both are nerds in their own field) and both can engage in intelligent and analytical discussions.
Ah well I blab a lot. Sorry for the long post. I hope we can see Law (and Robin) interaction again soon. I might write to you again next time. Hope you're not bored. :)))
Hi, thank you so much for the long message you sent me. I feel so heartwarmed whenever someone shares their lawbin experience with me. I’m sorry it’s taken me a few days to get back to you, I’ve been busy lately :(
I’m glad you enjoyed the analysis, even though I wrote most of it late at night when I was supposed to be sleeping, so my writing was probably a mess. And OMG I’m a baby one piece fan—I only got into it last year. It’s so nice to know someone has been in the fandom for so long! I’m happy that one piece has grown so much that it’s now easier to find people to share your one piece thoughts with!
I also really wish we could learn more about what happened to Robin during the time skip. I think one piece has grown with its audience, when you read it at different stages of your life, your interpretation changes. I’d say I’m lucky because I got into it pretty late, so a lot of things have already been revealed, and I didn’t have to wait for them haha I’m also super happy that you’re back and shipping lawbin too. The more lawbin fans, the merrier!
I do also ship them so hard, and I’m thrilled to have met so many lawbin shippers who share my obsession. The shipping fandom can get pretty toxic nowadays, but as long as we focus on our ship and find happiness in it, I think we can ignore all the hate :)
I know a lot of people believe that opposites attract, but my personal experience tells me otherwise, and that’s one of the reasons I ship them. I’m so happy my blog has reached you, and I want you to know you’re definitely not alone!!
If you’re interested, you can always join the lawbin discord (shamelessly promoting) https://discord.com/invite/NRE3hheBPA
There are even more Lawbin shippers there, and we can delulu haha :D Thank you so much again for sharing your thoughts! <3
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If I'm There: Chapter Twenty-Three
read from part one here!
summary: Noah and Natalie met in high school and developed a relationship through their love of music and art. Falling in love, innocent and young, they think nothing can keep them apart. However, sometimes in the pursuit of your dreams the things we love the most get left behind.
this is a complete work of fiction, some characters while based on real people are totally made up. :)
Taglist: @lma1986 @cookiesupplier @notingridslurkaccount @blackveilomens @thisbicc @laurpartyprogram @concretenoah @thebadchic @jessitpwk@madomens @samanthasgone @myownthoughts12@missduffsblog @jilliemiw86 @malerieee @hi-fancy-seeing-you-here @badomensls @robabankfuckmickeymouse
“Things are pretty normal given the situation. Noah has called a lot since he left and talks with Erin for almost an hour on the phone each time. We talked for a little bit but honestly, my feelings for Noah are getting so cluttered it’s hard to talk to him for too long”
“When you say cluttered what do you mean exactly”
“It’s just hard talking on the phone, you know, with everything. We saw each other for the first time in ten years and then I shook his whole world telling him he’s a father and I just wish I knew what he was thinking. We didn’t have enough time to talk about it all. He met Erin and it was great but I just…I feel like a failure of a mother for depriving her of him for so long and I don’t know how to express to him that I’m sorry. And honestly, I’ve never let myself get fully over him, I just feel like there’s always been a piece of me that has loved him, maybe just from what I see in Erin.”
Dr. Grady is quiet for a few moments while she thinks and takes in my words.
“I cannot speak for Noah, but I believe forgiving yourself for the past is important and a necessary step in your healing. You’ve already mentioned that there’s nothing you can do to change what has happened and it seems like you’re focused on helping Erin navigate this situation. As for your feelings about Noah, there is nothing I can tell you, that is a completely personal journey that you will have to take.” I sink lower into the sofa in Dr. Grady’s office and try to unjumble my thoughts, but those surrounding Noah will take time to fully unpack.
“And on top of all of it, my brother just got to town last night and I swear if you had told me ten years ago I would say I was jealous of Kyle's emotional maturity I would have pissed myself laughing.” As I tell Dr. Grady more, I recall my conversation with Kyle last night after Erin went down for bed.
“So, she met Noah huh? And she seems pretty happy about the whole situation so I’m guessing it went well?” Kyle asked cautiously. “Yeah, it went better than I expected. He was great with her, asked her questions about what she likes, talked to her about music and his life. He’s called her every other day since he left and they talk for hours.” I tell him as I pour the two of us a cup of hot tea.
“How do you feel about all of this?” He asks while blowing the steam off the cooling cup of tea in his hands.
“When I myself understand my feelings I’ll let you know.” I let out a pathetic laugh, “I’m happy for Erin, she’s happy and that’s what’s important. I’m trying not to think too much about all of the "what ifs you know? I told myself that I wasn’t going to let my feelings mess this up for her. She deserves a relationship with her father” I tell him honestly and then because I’m unable to stop it the word vomit spews out of me. “But I can’t help thinking what if I had told him ten years ago, would we have gotten back together? Would I have ever known truly if it was for me or just because I got pregnant, I mean how would you feel missing Natasha’s birth, her first steps and her first words?”
He takes a sip of tea and sits up straighter in the kitchen chair. “I think I would be upset at first, which you said he was but Nat, you’ll drive yourself crazy if you keep thinking about all of these hypothetical scenarios.”
“But like would you be able to forgive Maggie? Would you still haven’t wanted to marry her?”
A look of complete understanding washes across his face, “Nat, why do you insist you deserve to be hated for this? Why can’t you accept that he’s forgiven you and move forward? You forgave him for leaving all of those years ago. You’ve forgiven me for all the terrible things I’ve done, forgiven Dad too. You forgave Mom before she died. You believe everyone is worthy of forgiveness but you, why?”
“You believe everyone is worthy of forgiveness but you…that’s what he said. It sent me for a loop. It’s true. I’ll allow everyone to be flawed and make mistakes but when it comes to myself I wonder how I haven’t been dropped by every person in my life” I explain the conversation to Dr. Grady and wait for her response as I sit up and prepare for the end of our session.
“It’s common for people with anxiety to suffer from severe self-criticism. I’m going to send you a few readings I’d like you to look over before our next session and we can discuss it more since we are almost out of time.” She clears her throat and straightens up the papers in her hand. “It’s a very good question your brother asked. I think you should think about that one, why do you think everyone else is worthy of forgiveness but you? Because you are Natalie, you are worthy of forgiveness and you need to start by forgiving yourself.”
I quietly thank Dr. Grady for our session and leave once our time is finished.
She’s right and so is Kyle. I constantly forgive everyone all the time but never allow myself the grace of forgiveness.
Erin is happy, Noah is happy and it’s about damn time I let myself be happy too.
It’s around 4pm when I return home from therapy and my grocery store run. I got all of the essentials for a fun backyard fire pit dinner. We’re roasting hotdogs and then s’mores for desserts later.
When I get into the house I hear laughter and music filtering in through the kitchen, I walk through and notice the sound is coming from the backyard where Maggie and Kyle have set up the waterslide for the girls.
“Uncle Ky! Go go!!!” I hear Erin bellow as I see my brother fling himself down and slide all the way to the end of the slide.
“Oh hey, Natty!” Kyle calls, standing and shaking the water out of his hair. “How was your appointment?” He asks softly.
“It was good! Yeah, I feel good, thank you for talking to me about it last night, it was really helpful Ky.”
“Of course sis! What are twins for?” he says and then wraps his arms around me wiping water all over my dry clothes. “Kyle! Ugh!” I call out and push him off of me while he lets out a full bellied laugh.
A few hours later we are sitting, dry, around the warm fire. Kyle and Maggie are staying at a hotel but when Natasha started to get sleepy we put her in Erin’s bed until they left for the night.
I’m helping Erin roast a marshmallow when Maggie comes into my view, handing me a glass of wine. “I think it’s time for that girl-talk I was promised” she giggles and turns to Haylie who’s sitting and roasting her own s’more, “and I mean you as well girl, I wanna hear about this new book. You gotta tell me if they’ll end up together in the end please”
Haylie laughs and zips her lips, “hey I’m spoiler-free over here.”
Handing Erin her assembled s’more she thanks me and takes a huge bite causing marshmallows to overflow out the side and drip down her chin. I laugh and wipe it before it hits the floor.
Kyle stands to leave us to girl-talk and gestures towards Erin, “Come on sweety, let’s go watch a movie while your mom has her lady talk, it’ll be boring”
Erin giggles into her s’more “They just want to talk about Noah and how mom used to like him and now they’re both weird” she states while tossing a strand of hair over her shoulder and I can’t help the laugh that bubbles out of me, “yeah, sorry for being weird kiddo. I’m working on it.”
“Aren’t you observant?” Kyle says to Erin steering her towards the back door.
The three of us giggle at the way Erin was able to perfectly sum up the situation, “She sees everything I swear and she’s too smart.” I comment under my breath as I take a small sip of the wine Maggie brought me.
“What’s going on in that head of yours Natty,” Maggie asks and her face is nothing but compassionate. “Too much Mags, too much.” I take another long sip of wine and look into the slowly dimming fire. “I am so unbelievably happy to see Erin happy..”
“I’m sensing a but coming,” Haylie chirps from her chair on the other side of me.
“But.” I say, giving her a pointed look, “but I am just still navigating my own feelings about all of this, so I’m just a little scatterbrained.” I admit.
“Do you think it’s possible Noah could still have feelings for you?” Maggie asks and I shoot up in my chair, surprised by her question.
“Oh god no, I was just talking to my therapist about how shocked I am that he can even stand being around me,” I say and Haylie busts out laughing.
“Oh my god, are you blind? Dude the way he was looking at you not only the literal day you told him about her but the day he came over and was here for like eight hours, for Erin of course but Natty, there is no doubt he was also here for you.” Haylie says with a matter-of-fact tone and my eyes roll back so far I think they might never come back. “Oh please, there is no way Noah has feelings for me, It’s been ten years and at this point, we are just trying to navigate this co-parenting thing.”
That gets a laugh out of not only Haylie but Maggie as well, “you’re either blind, stupid or both if you don’t think that guy is and always has been in love with you, knowing he now shares a child with you is only going to cause him to further attempt to submit himself as the only man in your life,” Maggie says but I shake my head in disagreement, I just don’t think that is in the cards for Noah and me anymore no matter how easily I lose myself in his eyes, or how I secretly listen to his music and have always known he was the most talented person in the world.
“Whatever our feelings for each other may be, Noah and I have agreed that the most important thing is Erin’s happiness. I’m not going to risk that so I just need everyone to respect that.” I say with more firmness in my voice than intended. Maggie looks at me with a quiet understanding, “I will support you either way. I’m always on your side.” she says. Haylie nods in agreement “Me too.”
We spend another hour outside finishing our wine before heading back inside to see Kyle and his family off for the night. Erin heads up for bed soon after and I do a final sweep of the kitchen before heading up to bed myself.
As I’m laying my head down my phone rings lightly and I hesitate slightly before answering.
Hey Noah, is everything okay? Sorry but Erin is already asleep if you wanted to talk.
Hey, yeah everything is okay. I figured she’d be asleep, I was hoping to talk to you actually. If thats okay?
Oh, um yeah, we can talk. Whats up?
Are we okay Natty?
I freeze. What does that even mean? Are we okay?
Um. yeah? Why wouldn’t we be okay?
I just feel like…I don’t know how to say this. I’ve been trying Natty but when I talk to you on the phone it’s like you can’t get off fast enough.
What do you mean? I just figured you wanted to talk to Erin so you could get to know her more.
I mean, of course want to talk to Erin, but Natty I want to talk to you as well.
It’s been ten years and I meant what I said about wanting to be in your lives.
You want to talk to me? About what?
He laughs and the warmth of it climbs into my heart and makes a nest.
I want to know about your life, I want to meet the Natalie that you’ve become and I want to try and make up for all this time I’ve lost.
Oh. I’m - well I’m sorry if I was short with you on the phone. Honestly, all of this has been a big change for us all.
I haven’t been good about dealing with this, obviously.
Yes, It was a big change but I want you to know that I don’t want you to feel like you have to do this alone anymore. I truly do intend to be there. For both of you.
That’s co-parenting right? We’re in this together now.
Yeah. Together. I like the sound of that.
I can’t help the blush that spreads across my cheeks and down my neck, I know he meant together as parents but for a moment I allow myself to believe we could be the happy family I’ve always dreamed of.
I know it’s late so I can let you go if you’re getting ready for bed-
No, no, I can talk. Unless you’re tired.
No, we just got off the stage and I’m to amped up to sleep yet.
So Natty, tell me about your life.
We talk on the phone for hours. About the last ten years, I told him about life with Erin and we reminisced about life when we were young. I don’t remember hanging up, but I guess I fell asleep sometime while we were talking because when I woke up there was an unread text on my phone.
Noah S : goodnight :) I have missed talking to you these last ten years Natty. It is good to be back in your world. 4:13 am
I walk down the stairs with a spring in my step and I feel lighter than I have since this all began. I know we will all be okay and I can finally say that Noah and I are friends again after all of this time.
The rest of the week with my brother and Maggie is so much fun. We spend time at the park, go to museums and even a minor league baseball game. When they leave at the end of the week I give Kyle a big hug. "Thanks for everything Ky, I love you bro."
"I love you too sis, you're an amazing person. don't ever forget that."
Noah and I start texting more frequently in-between our phone calls and I find myself smiling and laughing more at my phone than I have in years.
In a week Noah will be back and Erin is so excited.
I won't lie, I'm pretty excited as well.
next chapter
#noah sebastian#noahsebastian#Noah Sebastian smut#noah sebastian x ofc#Noah Sebastian angst#Noah Sebastian fluff#bad omens fluff#bad omen smut#bad omen fanfiction#bad omen fic#noah sebastian fanfiction#bad omens fanfic#bad omens rpf#bad omens smut#noah sebastian fic#lf Im there noah#rpf fanfiction#fanfiction#fanfic
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As bummed as I was at the time of reading it, I'm actually glad that "Blue Moon" had kind of a "cliffhanger" ending. Now, I and everyone else who reads it can project whatever happy ending we want on to it. For example, Carlisle talks Bella into naming their kid something unique but not overwhelmingly stupid and they fall in love. Rosalie and Emmett manage to overcome their issues and eventually join Carlisle and Bella in Volterra because "we're a family, goddammit and we should be together!" The birth goes as well as can be expected and Bella doesn't leave the planet after turning. She, with help from her family, becomes a pretty good mom and Carlisle is an amazing dad. Alice and Jasper keep in contact at a distance because of the Volturi and go searching for other hybrids. Aro becomes the baby's weird uncle and tells the kid all of his weird, interesting stories. At Aro's insistence, Bella develops her power and lowers her shield for him temporarily, causing him to go searching for the nearest vampire therapist. Emmett, I imagine becomes friends with Felix and Demetri while Rosalie gets along with Renata surprisingly well. They both adore the kid and since this is a world where Rosalie works on her issues, she doesn't get weird and project onto the baby. Bella and Carlisle get to have (probably?) good sex with someone they actually love and have commitment ceremony instead of a traditional wedding that's just them and the coven with Aro officiating. Alice and Jasper bring back Nahuel and everyone is relieved to know that the weird alien baby that they love should be alright. Nahuel's sisters get saved, probably by a delegation of Felix and a few of the scary-looking guards intimidating Joham into letting them leave if they want and they go live with him and Huilen and don't get pimped out by their father. And since "Breaking Dawn" doesn't happen, Demetri hears about Benjamin and Tia from Carlisle and immediately heads down to Egypt to tell them that Chelsea didn't make him leave and that while Benjamin has an interesting power, he's not someone Aro is desperate to have. This leads to a TLTIC situation where Tia and Benjamin decide to leave with Demetri and he brings them back to Volterra. Tia befriends Heidi, Benjamin becomes the baby's cool cousin, and Demetri becomes a very confused but protective big brother to them both. The twins are disappointed that the baby's not a squid but enjoy spending time with it regardless. Edward probably goes full Edward and gets executed by Caius but everyone knew it was bound to happen so they just get closer instead of falling apart. Esme just goes to the Denali and ends up becoming their MomBot, which is probably the happiest ending she's going to get. Alice and Jasper break up but it's on good terms and they're still part of the family. Jasper leans on Carlisle the most to maintain the diet and Carlisle, in turn, becomes closer to Jasper as a brother than as a "father." Bella finally talks to both Rosalie and Jasper without Edward interfering and realizes that they both like her just fine and develops a good friendship with them both. Alice's visions are stunted so she's kind of forced to be an actual person and see her family as actual people. She ends up with mixed results but everyone appreciates that she's trying. Her friendship with Bella, especially, isn't the same but that's not a bad thing for either of them. I imagine she'd get along pretty well with Corin. Emmett changes the least but he does start defending Rosalie more (something that's actually in the story) and he decides to take his job as "fun uncle" very seriously. Obviously they can't do the high school thing even after the observation period is done but they have each other, a support system in Volterra if they need it, they can wear whatever clothes they want, and they all live decently ever after. Anyway, it's a really sweet story with potential for a happy ending that you don't usually give the characters and I really liked it.
Blue Moon
Thank you, anon
(Not sure how I feel about "I've decided I like your ending because you didn't get a chance to make it sad")
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I have to ask you a question, I'm sorry it's just that you seem like a nice person and I don't want you to get seriously upset by what I'm going to say and I don't mean this whole thing to be negative.
With all of that out of the way: why do people like to make angsty stuff so much. Like I get it, it's to make aus or even have hcs about those said characters. But I have seen people who make angsty stuff and never continue their work about said angsty stuff and said people who said that the angsty stuff was going to have a happy ending never came though, it's just disheartening to see and just to see that whole bandee getting turned into Morpho thing basically reminded me of that. :/
Look I'll say this with an open heart, I tolerate angsty stuff and for those who make it to have character development or even tell stories and to help people explain hcs about certain characters, I can totally respect and understand. Sometimes we don't have to make happy stuff, sometimes we need to have a story to be told and such, and I wish you the best of luck with your whole bandee au.
Then again I'm very very very sorry for what I said and I hope you can forgive me for that. :[
hey there! I'm not upset by this at all, it seems like an honest question and i will take it in good faith. but it has an extremely simple answer: people generally make content because they enjoy it.
you can also make content for money, or because you think it will do well on social media when you crave ~*~The Numbers~*~ (most of us are at least a little guilty of this). but in terms of a question like this:
"why make that sort of content?" it's because we enjoy it.
why people enjoy angst and its contingents (dark stories, violence, drama, tragedy, etc) is extremely individual. it's like asking why someone likes any genre or any trope, or hell, any flavour in food, any animal, any hobby!
it can be confusing or hurtful when someone doesn't like something that you think is cool and exciting and perfect in every way; and it can be even more confusing- or even scary- when someone likes something you really really don't like.
but, and this is something which I think tends to come with age, it can also be very liberating! someone liking or disliking something in contrast to you is not remotely a bad thing!! it doesn't mean that you are wrong for not liking it, or that they are wrong for genuinely enjoying it*. you're just different; and that's cool and exciting!
because you asked me, i can tell you why I personally like angst:
⬇️ continued under the cut. not because of any content warnings, just because it's long. i also address the comment about discontinued work. ⬇️
I like to write drama and angst and put characters into the proverbial blender because:
I like to see characters be unfathomably and inspirationally strong in the face of incredible adversity. I like to see characters go absolutely insane trying to save their loved ones because they cannot imagine a worse fate than that loved one not being with them. I like to see characters fight and fight and fight for the better world that they know they deserve, that their loved ones deserve, and to never give up on each other even when things look absolutely hopeless. I like to see characters hit the despair event horizon; to realise everything is lost, that they've made a mistake, that they'll never get back from this-- and then to do it anyway. and at the end of it, I like to see those characters be happy; to see them comforted and recover and cry with relief because they made it, despite everything.
for that reason, angst and tragedy and drama hits a niche for me that can't be filled by fluff alone. i can write the characters being happy much more easily than writing a whole other plotline. but i like to see them be happy despite everything that tried to prevent them being happy, first.
many folks probably like it for other reasons. and not everybody who likes angst likes happy endings; tbh that hits a different spot of catharsis too! heck, not all of my endings are happy, but most of them are because i find it a bit more personally rewarding!
as for artists or creators who started a work and never finished it; i'm sorry, it sucks when you're invested in something and you don't see the finale. but please, don't hold it against any of those creators or conflate them not providing a happy ending with failure. it probably hurt them greatly to have to give up on telling a story they clearly cared about enough to start and share in the first place. art and storytelling (especially when you are providing it all from the heart for free on social media) is extremely hard work- whether it be fic, art, or sequential comics- and the ability to do it can leave you at any time without warning.
all of this said; if you personally don't like angst, I actually already content warn for it on my work! you can block this tag >> cw angst << or any of my specific AU tags if one is worse for you than the others.
or, perhaps my art just isn't for you! if you don't enjoy my content and are only 'tolerating it', then there's nothing making you look at it. you can either blacklist my tags, or block my account so that none of it shows up on your timeline. I'll continue to draw what I enjoy, and that will include my AUs (including the angsty ones), so if you don't want to see them i suggest you do whatever you need to cultivate your online space accordingly!
anyway, this was long, but i wanted to give you the time of day anon, because you seem genuine. and maybe you haven't had the chance to learn some of these things yet, so i hope you'll find some of this a little helpful! i will say, however: i've seen asks like this sent in to people in much worse faith. i'm going to make abundantly clear that i won't tolerate that here or give the time of day to any rude behaviour. liking or disliking angst/tragedy/whatever does not and never will make you morally superior than the next person; it's just a matter of a variety of personal taste.
and we're all different. and that's cool and exciting!
*i'm putting this here as an important footnote, but i obviously don't mean shit that is objectively harmful or intentionally malicious. i do also think that as online creators, especially in a shared space like a fandom, it's important to listen to tag requests and to cw appropriately for all sorts of things. i myself only just learned that people need warnings for eyes and eye contact! i expect people to cultivate their own online experience, but i also expect this to be made easy and facilitated by comprehensive and considerate tagging and respect of boundaries. i'm still learning but i'll always do my best to tag appropriately!
#asks#starflungs personal tag#see how i tied that together? cool and exciting!!#ooauaughwgh even when i'm writing a long ask response i'm still a sucker for a narrative that ends where it starts lmao#edit: in hindsight i want to put a tw on *this* but i'm not sure what. creative guilt? augh. it's in the ask itself so i can't even hide it
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Hi Bee! You seem to read a lot of books, and I've been trying to get back into reading books rather than fanfiction as of late (which is going good atm). I used to read a lot of actual books when I was younger, but once I was a pre teen I'd discovered fic and had trouble reading actual books unless I had to for school lol. Anyway, my question is do you have any book recs? While for right now, it is going well, I only have two books I'm planning on reading after I finish the two I'm reading simultaneously right now. So it'd be nice to have some more for once I finish those as well. :D
Another reason for my wanting to get back into reading actual types of books is studying a more formal written literature to improve my writing, and to observe what author's do with their writing style that I'd want to incorporate in my own writing. If you have any tips for studying/observing, I'd also love some of those.
While this doesn't really have to do with the whole book thing, I just wanna say that you definitely inspired me to want to write more. Most of your titles always sound so cool and make me wanna read anything of yours solely based off them, and your plot, descriptiveness, metaphors, Greek mythology references, and so many other little things about it make it so enjoyable to read and something I'd strive to be within my own writing. A little silly, I know, considering it's MCYT fic, but your writing is genuinely so cool.
That's all I wanted to say, bye bye.
this is so kind thank you!! it seriously makes me so happy anytime someone tells me my silly fic writing inspired them to start/improve their own writing. writing is such a beautiful art but it's also a skill you have to put so much time into. you're off to an amazing start already with recognizing that you have to read published novels to improve your writing. it seriously helps so much.
I can definitely give you some recs! I'll put them under a read more, but since you asked for tips when reading novels:
try to pay attention to things you like and don't like about the author's writing style. like if you're reading a novel and there's a line of description that's particularly gorgeous or sets a scene super well, consider annotating the book with a pen or highlighter or if you don't own the book itself, copy down the line/paragraph somewhere (notebook, notes app, smth like that) to refer back to later. or if you find yourself super immersed in a conversation going on between two characters, take a step back to notice how the author writes out the conversation. is there a lot of physical description of what the characters are doing while they speak that lets you picture th escene easily? or is the dialogue rapid fire back and forth which forces you to just be sucked into it? what about it do you like?
or, on the contrary, if you find yourself struggling to enjoy a book try to notice what about the writing style is pulling you away. is there too much flowery description that makes you want to skip ahead? is there too much exposition so you feel like you're just getting an infodump instead of a narrative? take stock of what your own thoughts are as you read and then try to figure out why that is.
also, a tip I heard once is that you can always try to emulate a specific style. if you want to improve your writing and you just read a book with a writing style you really want, maybe try and write a random scene in that same style. it doesn't have to be anything original or even good, no one ever has to see it, it can just be for your own practice. just keep the book beside you and try to pick out what makes the writing style distinct, and try to emulate that. not saying you have to adopt that style, but just trying out a new style can give you some variation to help you develop/improve your own.
okay now book recs time, this'll get long so putting it below
now you didn't specify what kinds of books you like to read so I'm going to just throw in a few from a few different genres I've read. most of these are books I've recced here on my blog before but they're all a bit scattered so I'll rec them again. now, I mostly read fantasy or historical fiction because I just like those genres but I'll try to include some variety here
Genre: Fantasy (Typical Medieval)
The Priory of the Orange Tree by Samantha Shannon
one of my all time favorite novels. incredibly expansive fantasy worldbuilding that draws from a variety of cultures that's not exclusive to just europe. of course there's one country that's fantasy england, but you also have countries that take inspiration from asia, africa, and the middle east. you follow several characters that vary in age, race, gender, sexuality, etc. and they're all wonderfully fleshed out and fascinating. the story itself is also just fantastic and the world really swallows you whole. there's also a prequel to this called A Day of Fallen Night that I actually think I liked a bit more than Priory, but I'd recommend reading Priory first because it's easier to get into the world through that one whereas ADOFN is a bit more dense.
Genre: Fantasy (Apocalyptic? Sci fi? Kind of?)
The Fifth Season by NK Jemisin
similar to priory, the fifth season is a masterclass in worldbuilding and creating interesting worlds. that's where the similarities end though. technically speaking The Fifth Season is a fantasy and not a sci fi, although it feels more like sci fi to me tonally. The Fifth Season explores a world that is so regularly tormented by apocalyptic natural disasters that everything is formed around survival and it makes for such an interesting culture. the story also does an incredibly interesting and unique thing with POV that I rarely see in novels so that's also super fascinating to dig into for writing study. currently reading the sequel to this one and I love it so far.
Genre: Historical Fiction
Hild by Nicola Griffith
alright if you really wanna stretch some writing/reading muscles this is definitely a book you can try out. but be warned, it is dense. I'm a fairly fast reader and it took me so much longer to read this than I was expecting just because of how dense the writing is. this story takes place in 7th century Anglo-Saxon Britain so there's a lot of Old English words thrown in, and while there's a glossary at the back it doesn't cover everything. this is a really interesting novel though that dives deep into the time period and the specific life of one girl as she grows up at the heart of the political machinations of the Anglo-Saxon kings. really great if you're like me and think learning a lot about what life was like in this time period is super fun, but I could see it being a drag for people not super into history like that. I still think it's a really good story though on its own, especially with how the main character is characterized as she grows up, and how it represents all the politics going on at this time
Genre: Satire/Dystopian Fiction
Chain Gang All-Stars by Nana Kwame Adjei-Brenyah
I'm including this because I'm trying to give you a bit of genre variety. If you want to read an adult dystopian book for our modern day this is definitely an excellent one to pick up. warning, it's incredibly effective as a dystopian novel because all I felt was dread and fear after finishing it. it takes place in the near future where the prison industrial complex has been combined with the entertainment industry. prisoners who are serving a sentence of either 25+ years or life are given the option to compete in televised gladiator style death matches. if they survive 3 years, they'll be released. the novel is incredibly on the nose and not subtle whatsoever about it's criticisms of capitalism and racism, especially the racism that the prison industrial complex is built on. the horrifying thing about reading it is how easily I could see this becoming a reality, especially the brand sponsorships. it made me want to laugh and cry at the same time because of how ridiculous but realistic it was.
Genre: Mystery/Thriller
Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn
And here we have my all time favorite novel. this novel is a great example of unreliable narrator and how to tell a story two different ways. if you don't know the twist for this already, go into it blind, I promise it'll be more fun that way. the premise of the story seems simple—the morning of their 5th anniversary, a man's wife goes missing and the story follows his attempts to find her. but it gets way messier than that. this novel is an excellent example of how to characterize horrible people and still make them enjoyable to read about. also, if you're like me and enjoy media about two shitty people having an unhealthy and fucked up relationship, you'll adore this.
Okay that's a lot so I'll stop there for now, but feel free to pop into my inbox if you want anymore recs! especially if there's a specific genre you're looking for. if I've read anything that fits what you're looking for I'd be happy to throw it your way!
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I am so curious as to what you'd think about Nina and Hoodie as a duo. They've been two of my absolute favorites (even if Brian technically isn't even a creepypasta) since I was younger and I've always loved them as a sort of big brother/little sister pairing. They are so siblings to me I adore them. What are your thoughts on the sillies..
OHHH this is actually super interesting... but also im worried i do not have a lot to say because they won't mesh very well/very much. but i will try. not super realistic headcanons i think but what do i know... <3
brian isnt very present in my story, partially bc ik some mh fans dont like the crossover very much. and by time ninas in the story, i want him+tim to kinda separate from slenderman as toby and kate take over. he's still involved and coming around since he gets horrible slender sickness(but its from the operator) if he's away too long, but he doesn't live near or befriend most of the main cast..
nina is very present in my story because i love her and she is such a good and fun representation of the fandom yk. but brian is much more realistic and late 30s man, while nina is a very cartoonish early 20s girl. theyre on very different fields character and life wise...
BUUUUUUUUUT they would still meet of course.
she'd be bubbling around the entire cast, meeting people through jeff. people initially think she's in the same vein as jeff, natalie, and toby, with a LONG list of blood on their hands influenced by the operator, so they just don't think much about it. theyre mostly surprised by how cheery she is, but the proxies are the first to find out she's just... obsessed with jeff..... so thats very off putting. brian isn't fond of it.
nina would develop some light slender sickness(again, from the operator) just by being around jeff all the time, but the operator never infected her because he didn't see her as a worthy vessel. so, she would have to come to the proxies about it. if toby isnt in the mood or busy, she'd just have to hope brian/tim are around with some pills that'll soothe the pain
brian is more likely to help. with nina, he'd be quick to take on a more protective role, trying to console her as she cries on the couch holding her head whining about static.
initial convos would go smth along the lines of "do you want some coffee ? or uh kids like hot chocolate huh... maybe tea" "i'm literally in my 20s please tell me toby has weed somewhere" "that does not help with this pain i promise" "how would you know" "haha. water it is."
brian was a major stoner back in his early 20s and nina thinks its fucking hilarious. . . she'll try to get him to smoke with her but he's rlly not interested LOLLLL.... hes like 15 yrs older than her he thinks its weird .
again, he's not around a lot, but she's always happy to bump into him. she'd be squealing n shit 'HIII BRIANNNN how r u :3' and he'd just be like :) hey nina. and then never answer the 'how r u' bc he doesnt actually wanna sit and talk .
its a good change of pace. he's been through hell and back for well over a decade by this point, everyone around him is a sad sack of shit, and he spent a long time just. fighting to be an optimistic, cool guy to hang around . . but .... like.... um..... its hard to be that kind of person after all he's been thru. something about nina just forces that sort of like..... glee out of him . its not a huge difference where he's suddenly bouncing and giggling and whatever, he's still just Some Guy. but he'll be like :) lol .
mayhaps he'd catch her trying on toby's goggles and he'd offer to let her try on his mask. but nina would fake gag and be like 'no i dont want that dirty musty nasty sack on my head' and he'd be like ?????. then he'd say she can wash it and then try it on. which.. as an older sibling.... is the type of shit i'd do just to get my sister to do smth for me that i dont wanna do LMFAOOO. she might fall for it just cuz my dear nina is the ultimate fangirl
i dunno i kinda struggled with this one just cuz in my au, they wouldnt be all that close and the Type of characters they are don't mesh very well, but i am super fond of the concept and would love to try expanding on it more
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My Thoughts On The MK1 Story Mode
Ok! So I wanted to wait to post my thoughts on the game until after it released, so now that it is, I'm gonna spill my thoughts on all the characters!
Starting with the Earthrealmers!
Liu Kang: I LOVE his new design and I love him as a God even more than I expected! Also, him and Kitana reuniting?! AHHHHHHHHH!!! I legit had tears in my eyes when they kissed! It was such a bittersweet moment and I hope we get more of them together in the future. I'm so happy that he got his power as titan back because it just seems more right. Giving it up seemed kinda wrong. So I'm hoping it stays like that.
Raiden: He's SUCH a sweetheart and I adore him! I was surprised that Kung Lao wasn't his champion but I guess it's understandable, since he still seems in over his head. 😂 But I am very happy that he got to be champion instead. And I was SO surprised to see the old Raiden model make a return as well! I'm glad they didn't change him because that would've made no sense. 😅
Kung Lao: Ah, what can I say about good ol' Kung Lao? I honestly loved him a lot more in this game than any of the others. He seemed to have a lot more comedy moments in this one, which I really loved. I literally almost died laughing when he burped in front of General Shao and Reiko and disgusted them. 🤣
Johnny: Funny? Check! Smart ass? Check! Self-absorbed? Check! Literally the same Johnny as before and I love that! I loved his friendship development with Kenshi and it was truly something I never knew I needed. And also, him filming with his phone 90% of the time was so fucking funny and him somehow owning Cassie's drone was oddly heartwarming. 🩷
Kenshi: I knew Mileena was going to blind him in that scene! I was so sad that it happened again, despite expecting it. When he asked Baraka to tell him about his life to take his mind off of the pain, my heart broke for him. 🥺 But him discovering Sento has powers to help him was so cool to watch! I really love how they did his story in this game. And again, he and Johnny were a duo I never knew I needed.
Sub-Zero: I don't know whether I love this guy or hate him! 🤣 Honestly, his grumpy attitude makes me want to bug the shit out of him and piss him off more. 😂 And I'm not sure if he ever smiles. But it is so interesting to see Bi-Han as Sub-Zero again and I am quite happy with the results. That doesn't mean I forgive him for what he did though. 😑
Scorpion: When I heard that Bi-Han was Sub-Zero, I was worried that Kuai Laing wouldn't be coming back. So I'm happy to see him back again. But I still don't know how I feel about him replacing Hanzo. Honestly, Hanzo will always be Scorpion to me. I was upset to see that he lived a hard life on the streets before Smoke found him. At least if Hanzo wasn't Scorpion anymore, give him a good and happy life. 🥺 But I feel like Kuai Laing should be his own character. Maybe I'll whip up a name and design for him later. And also, Kuai Laing is married to Harumi?! What the fuck?!
Smoke: I did not expect him to be as sweet as he is! Like, what?! He had been through so much it makes my heart hurt! And the way Bi-Han treated him made me so sad! I'm glad that he at least has Kuai Laing to be a big brother figure to him still. Because after all, where there's smoke, there's fire. 🧡🩶
Syzoth: What a fucking cinnamon roll! Seriously! I was PRAYING he would be a good guy and not some villan's henchman again and I got exactly what I wanted and more! I already knew about his family being captured, but I had no idea it was his wife and son! He is literally this timeline's Scorpion and it breaks my heart! 🥺 At least he had a better outcome though. I hope we get to see more of him like this in the future. Also, I knew him and Baraka would be friends but I had no clue they had so much in common! Another duo I never knew I needed!
Baraka: I never thought I'd actually like Baraka, let alone feel so sorry for him! Tarkatans are diseased people? Seriously?! What the FUCK, Liu Kang?! 😭 I'd still bet money on that man who attacks Shang Tsung in the beginning being Baraka. It just all adds up. Shang mentioned his potion being able to treat tarkat and then he shows up, amgry that he lied about it being able to cure his daughter? Ok, TOTALLY him! But maybe he can help Syzoth through his grief of his dead wife and son and they can tackle Shang Tsung together once Mileena doesn't need him anymore?
Ashrah: She is literally such an angel! Fun fact about me: I used to be an Ashrah main when I would play Armageddon when I was a kid. 🤭 I hated her new design at first but now I love it! And that easter egg about her hat was perfect! 😂 Also, I didn't expect to like her personality nearly as much as she did. I mean, when Johnny told her that she is welcome to join them in Earthrealm and she said "I've never had a home. That would be wonderful." my heart literally fucking melted! 🥺💖
Sindel: We FINALLY get good Sindel back and they take her away?! WHY?! 😭 Was I the only one who actually cried when she died? Like, they made her so likable in this game. *Sighs* They giveth and taketh away. 🙄
Mileena: I am SO happy that they kept her as a good character and that she isn't always Tarkatan! I wasn't sure how I'd like her being Outworld's empress because I thought for sure she would be evil, so seeing that she was actually kind and not a blood thirsty monster made me super happy! Also, I've been waiting YEARS to see her and Kitana have an actual sisterly bond and it finally happened! Couldn't be happier with her in this game. 💖 Also, her being so fascinated by Johnny's drone was so fucking adorable. 😂
Kitana: This was probably my most favorite Kitana yet! I was shocked that she wasn't made Empress but I actually like her as Mileena's #1 supporter and protector. And she's in charge of Outworld's armies? BADASS!!! And her reaction to Johnny being shocked by her age was so cute. Wait a minute... Who's sick idea was it to sit Kitanna beside Johnny anyway?! 🤨😑
Li Mei: I LOVE this Li Mei! Seriously, couldn't have done her better! Her design is perfect, her story was very good and she did so well to redeem herself. I never would have guessed that her and Sindel were close friends. But I love that! Now if only Sindel didn't die and we got more of that friendship— 😒
Tanya: Her relationship with Mileena was so cute and God, I need more of it! 😫 Also, I really misjudged her. I thought for SURE she would be a villain!
Rain: I don't have too much to say about him other than I liked his design and I seen him being a villain coming. 😅
Reiko: Pretty cool design and I actually liked him more than I thought I would. I'd like to learn more of his story in future games as well. (Also, Syzoth randomly mocking him in the intro dialogues was too fucking funny! 🤣)
General Shao: No words other than he is a dick and I can't take him seriously after that edited picture of him wearing makeup I seen on Reddit. 🤣
Nitara: What the fuck was that?!?! I mean, her design was ok. (Except for that cone-head hairdo. 😂) But Megan Fox did fucking AWFUL voicing her! I was so shocked because Megan is an actress and from what I've heard about her, she does pretty well. But I literally couldn't focus on any scenes with her in them because of how bad she was. How could they do our girl dirty like this?! 😭
Havik: Pretty cool but he makes me squeamish. I don't know why. 😆
Shang Tsung: I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! GO DIE! 🤬🤬🤬 It's crazy because I've always kinda liked Shang Tsung because he was always such a good villain but after that whole Syzoth thing, I despise the bastard. 😂 But I can't believe Shang from the old timeline disguised himself as Kronika to fuck over himself in Liu's timline! 🤣 Also, the new deadly alliance?! Let's gooooooooo! I LOVE all the old game references, especially the Armageddon one!
Quan Chi: I LOVE his new design! His eyes were so creepy and unsettling which was perfect! It's weird because even though I knew he was in the DLC pack, I didn't expect him to be actually IN the game. 😂 Probably, my most favorite Quan Chi so far.
Ermac: JARROD TOOK CONTROL OF HIM?!?! WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!?! God, when he got reunited with Sindel and the girls, I almost cried! That was such a beautiful reunion! 🥺 And Sindel is now a part of him too? This is crazy!
Geras: I'm glad he is on the good side. They kind of made him seem a bit against Liu Kang in the trailer for him so I was worried. But I love this upgrade, both appearance and personality wise. He seems like a kind soul. 😌
Honorable mentions: Madam Bo! What an absolute badass! I'm PRAYING for her to be a playable character in the future! 🙏🏻 Also, the alternate timeline characters?! That was SICK! And some of them were SO funny too! I mean Klockodle? Stung Lao? John Kahner? Janet Cage? THAT FUCKING SONYA/KANO ABOMINATION!!! 😭🤣 And I'm also declaring that since there are many alternate timelines, everybody's fanfics are canon! 😤
Anyway, yeah, we have waited years for this game—four, if I'm correct—and honestly, it was worth the wait. I can't wait to actually play it! 😌💖
#mortal kombat 1#mortal kombat 1 2023#mk 1#mk 1 2023#liu kang#raiden#kung lao#johnny cage#kenshi takahashi#sub zero#bi han#scorpion#kuai liang#smoke#tomas vrbada#reptile#syzoth#baraka#ashrah#sindel#mileena#kitana#li mei#tanya#rain#reiko#general shao#nitara#havik#shang tsung
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