#I'm just overthinking the process)

[skinsbyoctober]

Curious if there would be any interest in releasing work that isn't at all flexible and may require cookie-cutter forums set up in the way the skin was built? Like, I use the same formula in pretty much every skin I design for myself, and if you were to use it, too, you'd have to follow it as well (or know how to edit it yourself to make any changes).

For example --

Or is that just too inaccessible/unfavorable?

[fictionadventurer]

Beauty and the Beast for the WIP game?

My only real attempt at writing poetry before this year happened during a stretch when I tried to write a Beauty and the Beast retelling in verse. I got about two-thirds of the way through before it fizzled out and languished forever unfinished.

When it comes to my recent novel-in-verse obsession, the simplest option would be to take another look at this work and try to finish it. There's a lot of terrible poetry in there, but there are some that are somewhat better than I remember. I can't claim to be a judge of what's good poetry, but some of these are readable, so I'll share some of them here.

The first set of semi-readable poems covers the first meetings between Beauty and the Beast. (These are all numbered, and I'm leaving the numbers in place to better differentiate between separate poems. I think the speaker in most of these is fairly clear from context, but just in case, I'll put the speaker's name in the title, too.)

VI. beauty and beast

he is every nightmare i’ve ever forgotten he is thunder and darkness and death he is fear with fangs he is beastly

she is every dream i’ve never dared for she is roses and sunlight and life she is hope with jewels she is beauty

*

VIII. beauty

the chair creaks when he sits

my knees quake when he speaks

the master laughs when i ask

when i will die

my ears doubt when i hear

my mind reels when i realize

the master wonders when i began

to think he’d kill me

IX. beast

the rules are these you are mistress of this castle the servants will obey your every whim the rooms and all within are yours including me

you will dine with me at dusk we will not speak if you want silence you will look at me and try not to scream

i will not harm a hair of your head i will not cause a moment’s worry you will do whatever you wish except leave

X. beauty

his mercy shatters my world makes it bigger and at the same time smaller

how can i live in a monster’s cage

my life will be long and lonely with him my friend and at the same time jailer

how can i look at a monster’s face

the castle teems with wonders that all belong to him and at the same time me

what do i do with a monster’s love

*

The next set of poems I feel like sharing starts with Beauty finding a portrait in the castle, and then leads into her sharing a dance with Beast that makes her kind of freak out over the fact that she might be falling in love.

XXII. beast

today you found a painting in a long-forgotten room covered in cobwebs and shrouded in dust

there was a reason it was lost

the portrait showed a man with a face like the dawn and eyes like the sea you thought he looked kind

he was young and a fool

you may keep it if you wish or lock it back in darkness it matters not to me i used to see him daily

i doubt i’ll see his face again

*

XXIV. beauty (and beast)

if rooms have souls the ballroom is wise a radiant beauty long past her prime

she treasures the days when she lived and was loved she keeps them and counts them like pearls on a string

(she is not the only one, my dear)

long past midnight in moonlight and hush this sleepwalking girl can glimpse former days

a flash of a gown and a whisper of waltz what glorious balls must this room have beheld

(they were marvelous indeed, my friend)

it seems a shame she grows old alone with nothing but darkness and dust held within

i would dance for her return the spark of life if only we had music and i had a partner

(i will gladly dance with you, my love)

XXV. beast

my dear beauty don’t you know i learned dancing long ago

one step closer take my hand with a waltz you’ll understand

let the music guide your feet in a dance that’s slow and sweet

hand in hand and heart to heart it’s not love but it’s a start

XXVI. beauty

he is hulking beastly

i am small delicate

i should be stumbling crushed

but

we marvelously miraculously dance

and it feels like flying

XXVII. beauty (to the portrait)

man on the wall i may be mad but i must give voice to the storm in my heart and you are the only one near

the master puzzles me i know his home as well as my own but i know so little about him

(is he beast or man or nightmare or dream or captor or friend)

i saw his face and thought him a beast

(but he grows roses and reads poems and has never killed or even raised his voice)

i heard his voice and thought him a monster

(but he spared my life gave me his home and all he owned offered his heart and never once has been anything but gentle)

i watched him dance and thought him a man

(with grace like an angel or a prince and i think that maybe he was not always so lonely and that his heart aches for things lost)

what am i to think do say be feel about him now

and why do these questions always come at midnight

*

The final poem is one that I had completely forgotten about, so I was shocked to find it lurking in the latter sections of the document and showing signs of using some decent imagery. By polishing up the last couple of lines, I've got something that's not half bad as a standalone poem.

This one occurs during an extended period when Beauty is still trying to process her feelings toward Beast and figure out if this is really love or if her feelings are being warped by isolation and close proximity.

XXX. beauty

if this is love it is a dark and grasping love a child stumbling in the night crying for a candle flame and cherishing the smallest spark of light

if this is love it is a bleak and desolate love a skeleton tree in a barren desert windbeaten and scrubbed to bone and bursting into bloom at the first drop of rain

if this is love it is a smoke and mirrors love a sleight of hand or trick of light that takes my broken heart and fools me into thinking he can make it whole

[one-vivid-judgment]

Okay but in MattMick's case, who's the one who goes home after their first kiss and immediately starts being all "Okay, so we kissed, no big deal. But does he want something serious with me, or was it a spur of the moment thing?" and who's going "LET'S FUCKING GOOOO" internally the whole time, I need to know for science.

[cosmogyros]

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[goyurim]

exceptionally talented girls are on tumblr oversharing about their mistakes in the tags

[jichanxo]

still on the topic of titles: though i can see why you wouldn't, but isn't it hard for you to let go of placeholder names? and an unrelated new question: if i remember correctly, in senseific, you've completed writing the kuwagami part, but not the school stories part? do you have a problem with stringing it together, so that the relationships/events would fit with e/o naturally? (i hope i phrased that coherent enough)

this is long as usual, so

on titles:

the working titles are too literal and functional for me to get that attached to them, I think. It’s just shorthand for the larger idea itself. I suppose if there’s a placeholder title I like enough, then I’d keep it/adapt it into something similar. Funnily enough I’m probably likelier to think of titles/captions for my drawn artworks, though the file names themselves are still super literal lmao. those ones are usually the ones I’ve planned out in advance, because I want to convey a specific idea and it can be hard to do that visually without having a plan. 

obligatory examples: this arasawa piece -- the text itself was a key part of the storytelling, so this one was decided early, about the same time as my initial sketches. it's two parts, duty and desire, conveyed in imagery and words, both important. this schrödinger's cat themed umineko artwork -- i didn't really have anything concrete for this for a long while, but this was always about flux and uncertainty, so the words were always floating around in my head when i was making this.

on senseific:

STRINGING THE TWO PLOTLINES TOGETHER, OH BOY. this is very much something I have to just… wait and see on. If my process for the kuwagami plotline is any indication, then I probably will have to rewrite/shift things around when I find something doesn’t work. That’s part of why I made an excel sheet for this fic, so I (hopefully) can see which parts aren’t meshing and how I might be able to resolve them. Move things around, put them earlier or later, etc. and of course, there needs to be breathing room so it feels like they have lives that exist outside of each other. I’m feeling kind of nervous thinking about it right now. I suppose I just have to try?

I have tried to consider where these two plotlines would interact, but I just need more details to make sure I get it right, hence my need for note taking. I've also left a bunch of gaps so that there's room to let it grow in between kuwagami stuff.

The school related (as in, including school stories but also other stuff that takes place there) stuff I have right now is something like: 

Thing I invented for the intro

Follow up to this, resolution, lead into kuwagami story beat 

the conclusion to the dance club story (as far as my vague memory could get me), but With Kitakata. since the dance club is so early, it was an easy choice as a kind of starting point

Itokura related thing I invented and desperately need to flesh out 

Follow up to that 

(Imagine a big gap of time here) 

6. big moment that’s simultaneously a kuwagami beat and a school story beat -- yagami's continued refusal to trust kitakata or let him in on the investigation, resulting in the two of them getting into a physical fight. amasawa ends up going to sawa sensei to get them to break it up, and yagami realises that kitakata has a right to be worried for his students and shutting him out was a dick move actually (spoilers? but I’ve already talked about this scene before, so…) 

and from this last point it's pretty obvious that kitakata has to be involved with the conclusion of the case. i haven't written anything yet because i need to do the rest first, but this is almost certainly happening despite not being written down yet

but yeah, because my process is Like This, I kind of have no choice but to present the story in chronological order to make sure that everything progresses logically. ...honestly the structure of the ever-changing is obscenely impressive to me, I suppose it’s the power of planning — that you can go back and forth in time while keeping it meaningful and coherent. I love it so much… I will never stop singing the praises of the ever-changing, genuinely...

anyway, while i say the kuwagami plot is done, it's still pretty open, it's just that i've locked in what i think the major conflicts and resolutions are for that relationship. there's still room for the other plot to grow into (i hope) and in worst case I can tinker a bit with rewriting some stuff to make it work.

[rebouks]

you have a lot of characters in your story, how long does it take you to create characters, mostly side ones?

Too many, nonny.. too many!! 😅

Hmmm for me at least characters tend to develop over time, I rarely start off with a full picture for them in my head, if any. I usually just have a vague idea, create 'em then just plop 'em right in and see what comes to me lmaooo

Let's take Tristen as an example. I originally made him for a challenge he wasn't accepted for and I ended up needing a few extra's for Oscar's stay in rehab and thought he'd be a good fit. I wanted someone who Oscar would connect with more than anyone else so I gave them a few things in common, like music taste and their style. Then I thought of why he'd be in rehab and settled on an unfulfilling childhood, strict parents, let's go off the rails with a bad crowd type deal.. (not too different from Oscar either, though the nuances are quite different).

Then there's Bruno.. who was originally a reserved, intimidating guy we didn't know much about (neither did I LOL) but each scene he was in just gives me more ideas of who he is, how he acts, why he does the things he does.

Idk how to explain it but I really just go with the flow/don't overthink it. I don't plan shit, just like everything else I do.. it just happens naturally 😂

[myatlantispoets]

Someone kill me

[scootersscooter]

Gotta say I love those people who make walk through videos on how to solve math problems. Like yes, please do walk me through problem 35 from unit 5.6 of this 5th edition AP Calculus book thank you very much

[shingekinomyfeelings]

When did I become the kind of person who struggles to relax WITHOUT trying to do productive multitasking at the same time?

[moonbeamalice]

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[ironismn]

After 8 years I'm having an identity crisis again, someone help me I don't want to go through that shit TT

[malachitezmeyka]

Probably the very last thing I expected to happen last night was for me to have a sexuality crisis and overanalyse the last third of my life, and yet here we are

[purplecelestial-buddy]

Don't you hate those kind of characters who have so much pride that it turns them stupid because any comment could be taken as either praise or a challenge, and they never back down from those?

[reinabeestudio]

I don't regret the direction I took with Colorful Company at all (detaching from Deltarune & making it my own thing) but I admit sometimes I miss the simpler askblog days