#I'm just frustrated and trying to make a point

[librarianoftheclayr]

sorry american in the notes, I didn't think you'd be stalking the replies trying to find an argument! many apologies for not engaging with you directly, I was trying to be considerate by not tagging my hate (not that I hate you! but I know when people are taking the mick out of me, I don't really want to be tagged in it).

I absolutely do not think that immigrants are only people of colour - the horrendous discrimination against Poles and other Eastern European immigrants in the UK can only come from our dogshit anti-immigration sentiment and policies. and obviously all americans aren't white, although I'm not quite sure what point you're trying to make there?

my entire set of tags was expressing frustration with american imperialism and with how americans have somewhat hilarious world views on occasion.

if you want to see where I'm coming from, can I ask you to consider a few questions first please?

1) can you think of any reason why coins pushed into a geological structure in Northern Ireland (a country within the UK that uses pounds sterling) could most commonly be in pounds sterling? do you think tourists might need to use the local currency every now and then?

2) do you think racists who want a 'pure' britain have any issues with americans coming over at all? what is it about nigel farage's 'besties with trump' demeanor that makes you think he has any issues with americans at all?

3) I know my initial reaction when seeing people take the mick out of brits is to get a bit defensive (even when it's justified!) - do you think you could possibly be accusing me of racism as a defensive reaction to being teased?

if you're a member of a country that has a cultural hegemony in the world and has also done a bunch of bad stuff, you've got to learn to let it go when people talk about the bad stuff, mate.

for example - notice how I didn't say anything when you talked about what the british did to Aotearoa? that's because it's true! the british did a bunch of bad shit in Aotearoa, and even though it was my ancestors rather than me personally, I still benefit from it today! so I don't tell you you're racist for bringing it up, and maybe you can avoid telling me I'm racist for taking the mick out of americans? and then we all win :)

if you want me to delete this I absolutely will! like I said above, I hate being teased myself and don't really want to be tagged in it. but I just wanted to explain where I was coming from and hopefully get you to reflect a little bit? if possible?

Tourists are fucking up the Giants Causeway in Ireland by wedging coins between the rocks which are then eroding and staining everything and in some cases causing the rocks to crack. For any Americans on here planning to visit Ireland: There is a mystical and ancient Irish tradition says that when you visit any of our places of natural beauty you should speak at a normal volume, leave no trace you were there and fuck off home. Tell your friends and family.

Stop ruining fucking everything.

[bluewxrld07]

Soap (Alternate Ending)

Lando Norris X F!Reader

Summary: Y/N has always loved hard and shows that through affection. Especially lately. She's a touch-starved kind of lovergirl, and Lando has always been okay with it. At least she thought so.

Warning(s): tension, flangst, fluff

A/N: TAGLIST IS FULL!!!! I won't be able to tag anymore of you on it, I'm sorry, loves!! ALSO HOLY MOLY WE HIT 1,000 FRIENDS???! YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING WTF!! I love how much you guys are loving this fic and my writing, it truly means the world!! Enjoy this for now, friends :)

Lando hadn't slept.

He hadn't been able to think straight.

People noticed at the premiere that he had only been there physically, but not anywhere near emotionally or mentally.

Critics kept saying it was because of the loss he took, or that maybe McLaren was trying to replace him with Oscar. Replace what Lando had built from the ground up.

The truth was, it was never that. It was the words he said to Y/N. It was the way her facial expression changed and broke as he spat absolute nonsense at her.

Everything he said was out of anger and frustration. He couldn't get his words out of his head. He couldn't get her out of his head.

It didn't help that his encounter with Max had haunted him. The way he had this fire in his eyes, he's rarely seen. Something he has rarely even seen on the track.

His emotions got the best of him that night, and they continued to get the best of him. When it came to the after-party post the F1 movie premiere, he couldn't stop thinking about Lewis' words.

It didn't stop him from messaging Max that night of the premiere, asking if it were true.

You have a lot of fuckin nerve to be sending me a message right now

That's all he received from the Redbull driver, nothing more, nothing less. Lando didn't know if he should be worried or have no right to be upset knowing what he knows now.

He didn't even think Max would send a response back. If anything, he expected a middle finger emoji if Max did respond.

Lando sat in the backseat of the large SUV, playing with his lower lip as his knee bounced continuously. His other hand was counting his fingers back and forth with his thumb.

To say he was a nervous wreck was an absolute understatement.

His mind wouldn't stop racing. It just wouldn't give him a quiet state of mind. Not once.

He had finally touched back home in Monaco, being driven back to his place as he kept arguing with himself if he should go see her once he was unpacked at home.

She'd probably slam the door on him. Or worse, Max would probably answer and have Lando's head on a stick for even trying to talk to her when she wasn't ready.

At that point, he wouldn't care if he was being honest with himself.

He decided against it for the time being, deciding that maybe he should try later in the week. Even though it would eat him alive till he saw her again.

Once Lando had gotten up to his place, he threw his stuff on his couch, the apartment already feeling empty and cold without her presence there. It was as if the light had left with her. His place was dark and gray in that moment.

He let out a sigh as he looked around the place, feeling both defeated, hungry, and tired. All at the same time.

When he went to his kitchen to see what he had for food, he let out a frustrated groan as he realized he had emptied his fridge before going away.

He slams it shut before heading back over to his living room to grab his wallet, keys, and phone, soon making his way out of his apartment to head towards the car garage.

It was a quiet drive as he drove down the still buzzing streets of Monaco, not missing the way some people were videoing his car passing by. Nothing out of the norm for his life, he didn't thinka single thing from it.

He tries to pull his hoodie higher over his head, adjusting his cap as well, not wanting people to catch the way his face looked more hollow and sad.

Once he makes it to the cafe parking lot, he pulls into a spot more secluded from the entrance and quickly scurries over to the front door.

The cafe smells like fresh coffee and grilled food, something that made the atmosphere feel much lighter than Lando had expected.

He goes up to order something to eat and drink, mentally fighting with himself to remember to have his assistant order his groceries later on when he is settled back home.

As he goes to sit at a table and wait, his eyes do a double-take and his body freezes.

His eyes lock with none other than Max Verstappen's own, who is walking into the cafe and waiting in line. Max's eyes looked like they could put him six feet under if they were able to.

Instead of Lando going to take a seat, he decides to stand over by the end of the bar, and wait paitently till Max was done ordering.

He could hear the way he had ordered Y/N's go-to choices, making his heart and chest cave in. He felt so many questions began to bombard his mind, not even stopping them from increasing as it made him just want to fix things with her more and more.

He knew that would probably be borderline impossible with Max being the way he was about her.

More or less, the way he felt about her.

Once Max had finished paying, he made his way down the line and closer to Lando, his eyes glaring at the green-eyed man.

As Max walked up to him, instead of bumping Lando's shoulder, he turned to the side and pushed himself past his figure. Lando's body reacted before he could, grabbing Max's forearm.

Max whipped around and shot a look at Lando, his eyes still having fire in them.

"Let go."

Lando clenched his jaw, feeling his self-esteem slowly increase. He wasn't going to give in.

"I'm not letting go," Lando shook his head. That meaning had more behind it, and he knew Max figured that out as his eyes widened only slightly.

Max clenched his jaw before snatching his arm away, turning his full body towards Lando, and crossing his arms.

"Oh, so now you've got some spunk in you? Where was that at dinner?" he asks. "You're lucky I don't put you in a fucking grave right now."

Lando nods slowly. "I deserve that-"

"You deserve way more than that."

"Yeah, I do. I'm not going to deny it," he admits, watching Max not let up on his stance. "I never meant to hurt her. You know me. You know me more than anyone else in that paddock."

Max scoffed and rolled his eyes. "I thought I did. Until you threw everything Y/N has ever known back in her face like it was so easy. Like she was a joke."

Lando rubs his face. "I never meant to say any of it. I won't even excuse it, because taking my frustrations out on her should've never been the case. I know that. I know that, Max."

"So why the fuck did you say it then? Hm?" Max shoots back, stepping closer to Lando. "Why would you break her heart like that? Why would you say she is-"

"Because I was upset! I know it's not a valid excuse, I don't want to make any excuses. Because this was unexcusable," Lando snaps back, huffing in a defeated way as he feels his eyes begin to burn. "I regret what I said. Every single day since then. She is not even close to anything I said. She is the absolute and complete opposite of it. She's been my rock forever, Max. And if anything, I took it for granted."

Max sees Lando's eyes turning red, hearing a small sniffle leave his figure. This made Max soften. Not out of guilt, but out of shock.

Lando rarely ever cried in public. It wasn't something he did. He was emotional when it came to racing, of course. This was a different story.

"Y/N is loving. She's caring. She always gives love to everyone around her because that's just who she is. She's a giver. And I took her for granted."

Lando looks up from his shoes to Max, shrugging his shoulders as he felt his emotions take over, making him feel defeated more than he did five minutes ago.

"I'm sorry, Max," he says before chuckling dryly to himself. "I'm saying sorry to you because I broke your trust with her. I'm sorry that I made you think you can't trust me to date her."

"I'm not her dad, I don't care who she dates. I'm just protective of who she is around because-"

"Because you're in love with her. I know that."

Max froze, his shoulders dropping. "What?"

Lando nods before biting his bottom lip. "Lewis told me. He said how you really feel for her. It's why you are so protective over who she keeps around."

"That fucking piece of-" Max stops himself before rubbing a hand over his face, shaking his head as he scoffs to himself.

"You know what I'm not sorry for, though?" Lando spoke up, making Max whip his eyes to Lando, squinting at him.

"I'm not sorry for loving her, too. I'm also not sorry for wanting to fight for her," Lando admits. "I want her. I want her more than anything in this world, or the next. I want her more than a fucking world championship."

Max feels his chest tighten at his words, trying hard to not smack Lando in that moment.

Yet, at the same time, Max didn't blame Lando. He couldn't blame Lando for speaking his truth. He had more balls than any of the other racers at that moment.

Yes, Max loved Y/N. He always has, and deep down he always wished it would've been him she chose.

He also wasn't going to force her to fall for him; he wanted her to make a choice in who she wanted. Who she wanted to love.

At the end of the day, he just wanted her happy.

So, as Max stood in front of Lando, he took in every single detail of Lando's appearance. Thinking back to how much Y/N had raved about Lando when they first got together. How right he treated her, no matter the circumstance. Lando was her one.

And Y/N was Lando's.

"I'm not going to ask for your forgiveness, because I don't deserve it. I don't deserve hers at all, out of anyone's. I just wanted to get that off my chest. It's been eating me up," Lando adds. "But it doesn't mean I won't redeem myself for her, and show her how long I'm willing to wait to make things right."

Before they can say anything further, both of their names are called, causing them both to go grab their items.

Lando grabs his, Max still looking at him with a frown on his face. Lando gives him a purse smile.

"See you around, Max."

With that, Lando leaves and makes his way to his car.

"Lando."

Max's voice calls out behind him, causing Lando to stop and turn his head to look at the Dutch man.

Max walks up to Lando, stopping in front of him. Only to peer down at the items in his hand, and soon motioning over towards Lando to take.

They were Y/N's items. Her iced latte she loved, her favorite pastries, and a chicken caesar wrap with crisps.

"Don't fuck this up. Or you're not getting another chance. Ever," Max says, giving Lando the bag and coffee.

Lando looks up at him with a confused frown. "What?"

Max shrugs before letting out a huff. "Yeah, I love her too. I do," he admits with a nod of acceptance. "But I love seeing her happy more. And she gets that with you."

Lando feels his heart swell at the thought of that. Of her feeling that way with him.

"She's gonna kill me, but if this works out, it will be worth it," Max says dryly. He pats Lando's shoulder.

"Don't. Mess. This. Up."

With that, Max walks off towards his car. Lando slowly turned back to his car, setting the items in his car nicely so none of them spilled. Once he fully got into his car and turned the ignition, he sat there for a moment, just thinking about everything he was going to say.

Then he took a deep breath, put his car in drive, and set off for Y/N's apartment.

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Y/N had frowned at Max's message as it came in, wondering what he could've meant as she sat there.

Don't kill me, just trust me

He sent that message over fifteen minutes ago, still not back from the cafe. She hadn't known whether to worry or not, as he didn't respond to her questioning messages.

There were soon a few soft knocks on her door, making her frown to herself. She got up from her spot on the couch, wrapping the large hoodie more over her figure as she got to the door.

"Max, you can just walk in-"

As she opened the door, her voice froze mid-sentence, and her eyes widened.

"Hi."

She stood there frozen, looking at Lando, who stood there with the cafe bag in his hand and her iced latte in the other. His face showed a sign of uneasiness and caution, but she could also see he looked so tired.

"Lando?"

"May I come in?"

"Why are you here?"

"I want to fix things," he shrugs slowly. "Or at least say my part, and then you can kick me out. I just wanted to at least see you. Talk to you."

Y/N stayed silent for another moment before slowly moving to the side and letting him come in.

Once he had gotten inside, it immediately made him feel warmth grow in his chest. The familiar scents that screamed her, the warm lighting from her lamps and fairy lights in the room eased his mind. Eased his emotions.

He set her stuff down on the coffee table, his eyes catching her go to binge-watch show playing quietly on the TV.

Lando turned to face her once again, taking in her figure. Not missing that the large sweatshirt she wore had been one of the pairs he gave to her. It was his favorite one he owned, but he gave to her because he loved seeing her in it.

His eyes soon find her own, seeing her face also flush as she probably noticed he caught her wearing it.

"You can talk," she spoke softly, keeping her arms crossed and keeping a safe distance. He hated seeing how far she stood from him. The more they stood across from one another, was like his body began to realize it was her there. It had begun to crave the touch he knew and loved all too well.

"I first off want to say I'm sorry," he says slowly, clearing his throat. He watches her face contort lightly, as if she hated hearing the apology. He nodded. "I know that's not what you want to hear, but it's the first thing I need to tell you. Because I am. I will spend the rest of my days saying that."

Y/N stays silent, only nodding slowly for him to proceed.

"I don't condone anything I said, and no excuse will make up for what I said. How I reacted," he croaked out, trying his best to keep his voice from shaking fully. "No matter how upset or mad or frustrated I get, I shouldn't use you as a punching bag. It's not fair to you, especially when you're all I want after I have a shit day."

"Then why did you say that stuff?" her voice cracks out, making his chest tighten and his heart break. He sees her eyes watering.

"Out of frustration. I was upset at the race. At McLaren. At myself," he admits. "So I pushed you away. Distanced you from me because it was getting harder. I didn't want you to see me at my worst."

"You know I would never judge you. I'll never downplay you at your worst times. I've never done that. Did I do something to make you think that?"

He began to shake his head quickly. "No. Absolutely not, never. You've never shown me any sign of that," he reassures her as he takes a few steps closer to her. He watches as her body cowers lightly at his closeness, so he stays where he then stood.

"You have done nothing but love me, care for me, and show me how much I deserve. Showed me more than I think I've ever deserved," he assures her.

Lando watches her lower lip wobble, her eyes never leaving his own. He can see the puffiness underneath them now from where he stood.

He wanted to do nothing but take her into his arms, and shut them both away from the rest of the world and nurse her back to herself again. The her he loved that he broke apart.

"You were never clingy. You were never too much for me. You were never any of that," he shook his head as he looked down at her. "You've been nothing but loving, caring, selfless, and my anchor. You have always been everything I've ever needed."

Y/N sniffles as she looks at him. "Because I love you, Lan. Because you made me happy in my own skin."

He sighs in relief, nodding at her. "Y/N, I love you so much. So so much. I love you for you. I love who you are, and I'd never want you to change that. I fucked up in the worst way possible, and I can't tell you how much I regret that entire interaction. It haunts me. Absolutely haunts me."

"What if you were right? What if I am too much?" she chokes out, and he shakes his head.

"You're not, Y/N, you are not. You bring nothing but light and warmth to this world. To my world. To the F1 world. You are the absolute sunshine. Don't dim that light. Please," Lando shakily says, tears falling freely from his eyes. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I made you think you were. You aren't. You're everything."

Y/N slowly takes a step closer to Lando. Then another. Then another. Then another, until she is right in front of him.

Both of them are crying freely. Something she hasn't seen much from Lando, and she could tell his body had held in so much. So, being who she always has been, she reaches up her hand and softly uses the pad of her thumb to wipe away some of his tears.

She doesn't miss the way his body physically relaxes at her touch, a sigh of relief leaving his shaky lips as he closes his eyes. His body almost chasing her hand as she cups his cheek just barely.

"You have no idea," he says, slowly shaking his head. "No idea how much I miss you. How much I miss your touch. I crave it. I literally crave you, Y/N."

His eyes open slowly to find her own, looking down at her.

"I'm so sorry."

Y/N just looks back and forth between his eyes, before nodding slowly. Lando lets out a few relieving breaths as she nods, feeling his whole body relax as he keeps his eyes on hers.

"Please let me touch you. Hold you. Anything."

"Okay."

With that, Lando doesn't hesitate to wrap his arms around her waist tightly, lifting her up and wrapping her legs around his hips as he carries her to her couch.

He lays them down, her on top with her body wrapped around his own. Lando's grip not letting up, scared as if she might slip away again.

The pair held each other tight, Y/N finally letting her sobs fall freely as Lando held her tight, caressing every piece of skin he could. His voice stayed hushed as he whispered sweet nothings and apologies in her ears, vowing to never hurt her again. How he promised he would never let her slip away.

Y/N looked up from her spot in his neck a few moments later, as her sobs came to quieter sniffles, his eyes looking down at her.

Before she knew it, she had slowly pressed her lips onto his own, Lando humming softly at her lips on his after much too long. He felt his heart growing again, Y/N feeling her chest become full again the more she stayed in his arms.

The pair knew that there was much to work from, and much to still sort out. They knew they'd come back strong, it was just going to take time.

This was a start.

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A/N: Ahhhhh hello friends!! Hehe I told you that you'd be seeing me again VERY soon! I won't lie, this had been rewritten, deleted, and rewritten once again, like five times, lol until I was satisfied. I hope you all enjoyed this as much as I did writing it. I got a little emotional ok, it was too good.

I have some more stuff in the drafts, and most likely will be sending out a poll later tonight on which to release first. I can't thank you guys enough for showing all the love you have! I can't wait to show you all what more I have waiting hehe :)

Love you all and I will see you soon, friends!!

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[blaysreid]

You asked for a request and you shall receive

Fluff, fluffiest fluff I can have. Although I. Eed some order feelings in there si whatever else you want, angst, hurt/comfort, arguing as ling as it ends on a good note 🙏

Im think early to mid seasons spencer reid? Reader preferably another agent (not necessarily BAU if you want a change :) )

I might come back and if I do you can recognise me by 💿 :)

(May have gone overboard but oh well yolo unless you're one of em shifters) (I'm giggling)

A/N = this wasn't supposed to end up so long! But I hope it matches up to your expectations anyway. Lots of fluff and a super heated argument with spencer left appreciating and loving reader through apologies, sweet touches and words. THANK YOU FOR THE REQUEST ANON!!

pairing = midseason!frustrated!spencer + forgiving!frustratedbau!reader

summary = After a messy argument, Spencer and Reader find comfort the next morning over pancakes and quiet affection. With Reader in his lap, they feed each other between kisses, gently unpacking their hurt and offering forgiveness in soft, unspoken ways. It’s tender, sticky, and full of love. A slow return to each other, one bite at a time.

The police station was too hot.

Not just temperature wise but emotionally, everything felt like it was about to crack open. You could feel it in the way Morgan nearly snapped his pen in half earlier, in the way Emily was pinching the bridge of her nose, in how JJ had barely said a word since morning. And especially in the way Spencer Reid was currently standing across from you, arms folded, jaw clenched, and refusing to look up from his goddamn notebook.

You weren’t even sure what started it. It had been a long three days. A kidnapped child. Barely any sleep. Constant movement between press conferences, house to house interviews, a suspect list that only seemed to grow. And now the corkboard. Red string. Timelines. Locations. Your own handwriting shaking with exhaustion.

You pointed at the board with one hand and gripped your coffee in the other. “The route makes sense. The second and fourth victims were last seen within a block of Route 19. He’s following the bus path, or something close to it. I think he’s watching them get on, or off. It’s too specific to ignore.”

Spencer didn’t even look up. “The second and fourth, maybe. But the first and third lived well outside that zone. You’re seeing a pattern that isn’t consistent across all four.”

You stared at him, waiting. Hoping he’d soften it, or at least look at you.

He didn’t. Just turned a page and jotted something down.

That’s when the heat started to rise in your chest. The kind that burned slow, creeping from the inside out.

“You’re not even listening.” you said tightly.

“I am.” he replied, still without glancing up. “You’re presenting a theory that doesn’t line up with all the geographical data. If I thought it had weight, I’d say so.”

That’s when it happened. The crack.

You dropped your coffee onto the desk with a louder thud than intended. “God, Spencer. Not everything’s about data. Maybe try thinking about the actual victims for once instead of the stupid spreadsheet in your head.”

That made him look up. And god, the look he gave you.

Cold. Sharp. Analytical.

He blinked once. “You’re letting your emotions get in the way. Again.”

Your breath caught. Not from surprise but from how much it hurt.

You took a slow step forward, heart in your throat. “Don’t say that to me.”

He didn’t back down. That was the worst part. “I’m just trying to solve this case the right way. If we start throwing out logic every time it gets hard-”

“You think I’m being illogical because I care?” you snapped. “Because I don’t have your perfect, clinical detachment?”

Spencer flinched. Just slightly.

But you were already spiraling. “You act like emotions make someone less capable. Maybe if you actually let yourself feel something once in a while, you’d understand that gut instinct matters just as much as your numbers.”

He was silent. For a beat too long. Until he spoke up, coming out harsher and deeper than he intended to.

“I never said you were less capable,” he muttered. “Just… inconsistent.”

That did it.

You blinked hard, backing up as though the words physically hit you. “Wow,” you whispered. “Okay. You know what? I’m done.”

“Wait-”

“No,” you said, already turning away. “Finish your report, Reid. You don’t need me for this part.”

You didn’t hear what he said after that.

You didn’t want to.

When you were all settled in your seat the jet was too quiet.

Too many empty seats. Too much space between you and him. It was a small plane, but tonight it felt like a cold, hollow auditorium with only the sound of the engines to fill the silence.

You were seated near the back, pressed against the window as if you could escape through it. Arms crossed, headphones in, but no music playing. You didn’t want to hear anything. You just wanted to make it through the flight without crying.

Spencer had walked on a few minutes after you, his messenger bag slung tight to his side. He hesitated at the top of the stairs when he saw where you were sitting.

You watched him out of the corner of your eye. Saw the flicker of hope that maybe, just maybe, he could sit beside you. Or near you.

But then your eyes met. For one sharp second.

And you looked away.

When he took the seat across the aisle instead. Not too close, not too far, but it still felt like a mile.

Hotch didn’t come. He stayed behind to debrief with the local PD. Morgan, JJ, and Emily had all flown back early. But since you and Spencer were at the crime scene, it took a few hours longer to finish up.

NowIt was just the two of you and the pilot, and neither of you said a word for the first hour.

You could feel it though. Spencer kept shifting. Restless. Like he wanted to speak but couldn’t find the thread to pull.

He didn’t know how to start.

So he didn’t.

You tried to focus on your file, but the words blurred. The same way his face did when you let yourself glance over at him. Face pale under the cabin lights, brow furrowed like he was doing calculus in his head. He hadn’t written anything for the past thirty minutes.

He was thinking.

And you hated that you still cared.

Eventually, you stood up to stretch your legs, walking past him without a glance. You felt his eyes follow you. You didn’t give him the satisfaction of looking back.

But the silence was so heavy it made your chest ache.

When you sat back down, you gave in. Just for a moment. You looked at him and to your surprise, he was already looking at you.

And God, he looked like hell.

Not angry. Not cold. Just… haunted.

Like he’d been replaying every word over and over, and hated every single one.

He didn’t say anything. He just dropped his eyes and picked at the seam of his seat cushion like a nervous habit. It should’ve made it easier to stay angry.

But it didn’t.

Because no one looked that guilty if they didn’t mean it.

When the plane landed, the tension didn’t ease. It followed you both down the stairs, through the car ride back to Quantico, and up the elevator.

By the time you stepped into the BAU bullpen, it was completely empty. Everyone had already gone home.

You grabbed your go-bag and turned toward the exit.

But his voice, soft and shaky, cut through the stillness.

“…Wait.”

You froze.

His shoes tapped lightly across the floor. He didn’t rush. Didn’t demand. Just moved slowly and gently like he was afraid you’d vanish if he came too close.

“I shouldn’t have said what I did.”

You didn’t turn around. Your eyes burned, and your voice was sharp when it came. “Which part?”

He exhaled hard, hands in his pockets. “All of it.”

You finally turned. And when he saw your face, exhausted, red-rimmed, tired of fighting and just then, his expression shattered completely.

“I didn’t mean you’re inconsistent. I-" His throat worked. “I was frustrated. With the case. And with myself. And you were right. You usually are, actually. And I-I took it out on you.”

You stared at him.

“I’m not good at people,” he continued, quieter now. “But that doesn’t excuse it. You didn’t deserve that. I know I hurt you.”

Your lip trembled.

He took a careful step closer. “Please don’t shut me out.”

Something in your chest cracked.

You blinked, and the tears finally slipped. “You made me feel small.”

“I know,” he said quickly, voice breaking. “And I hate myself for it.”

You swallowed. Looked down at your shoes. Then back at him. “I was just trying to help.”

“I know baby.” he whispered. “I know. And I pushed you away.” His heart swelled at your vulnerability. Seeing you so upset and still hearing him out made him appreciate you more than ever.

You nodded slowly. “You did.”

He took one more step, then stopped close enough for you to feel the warmth from his coat. “Can I… can I fix it?”

You hesitated. Then reached out, fingers brushing against his. He latched onto it like a lifeline. Held it so gently you could’ve cried all over again.

“I don’t want to fight with you,” you whispered.

“I don’t either.”

You looked up at him.

“You owe me a smoothie.”

His breath caught a short, stunned laugh and you could see the tear caught in his lashes.

“I’ll buy you three,” he promised.

You squeezed his hand.

And left the BAU together.

Hand in hand.

Heading for the nearest 24-hour smoothie shop like it was the only thing keeping the world from falling apart.

After being tangled up in bed together for the rest of the night,soft whispers and gentle touches, morning came softly.

No alarms, no rush. Just the pale gold of sunrise filtering through the thin curtains, dust motes dancing in the air like the world had decided to move in slow motion.

You were warm.

Not from the blanket which had mostly slipped to the floor but from the man curled tightly around you. Spencer had somehow managed to wrap himself around every limb you owned. His legs were tangled with yours, his hand under your shirt but resting respectfully just above your waist, and his face… God, his face was nuzzled into the back of your neck like he belonged there.

You could feel his breath, warm and rhythmic. One of his curls had fallen into your ear.

You blinked slowly, adjusting to the quiet light. It was too early to be up but your body always knew when the sun rose. You shifted gently, stretching your legs.

He groaned.

A soft, pathetic little sound, like moving away from you physically pained him.

You bit back a laugh. “Spence…”

“Mm?” His voice was rough with sleep.

“I have to get up.”

“No,” he said immediately, tightening his arms around you like a sleepy octopus. “Stay.”

You huffed a gentle laugh. “Spencer.”

“Just five more minutes.”

“You said that fifteen minutes ago.”

He didn’t answer and instead just buried his face deeper into your neck with an exaggerated sigh that tickled your skin. “You’re warm. You smell good. The sun is out. The world can wait.”

You tried to turn, but he held you tighter.

“Okay, philosopher,” you teased. “You get five minutes. No more.”

“Ten,” he bargained.

“Spencer.”

“Okay, okay.” He kissed the back of your shoulder. “Five. But I get to hold you like this all day.”

You smiled, your cheeks heating. You reached back to comb your fingers through his curls. “I’m not going anywhere.”

You felt him relax behind you. His breath slowed again. A little hum of contentment vibrated against your spine.

“You make it easy to feel okay again,” he mumbled sleepily.

You closed your eyes.

“So do you.” You comb your fingers through his messy hair, feeling him relax more and more within every second.

A scratched up pan, two mismatched mugs (one with Einstein’s face, the other with faded snoopy with flowers), and a fridge that hummed like it was overworked. But it was yours. It was quiet. And it was full of something soft and healing this morning.

Spencer stood at the stove in one of your hoodies, sleeves a little too short, hair still sleep-fluffy from earlier. He looked painfully domestic and painfully unaware that he was currently flipping a pancake with all the focus of someone defusing a bomb.

You leaned on the counter behind him, sipping coffee from your cherry blossom mug, trying not to smile too wide.

“I’m just saying,” he said suddenly, “the first pancake is always a disaster. That’s not failure, it’s science.”

You raised a brow. “You’re blaming physics for your burnt pancake?”

He turned to you with the spatula still in hand. “Well yes. The pan is still regulating temperature. Uneven surface heat leads to inconsistent Maillard reactions. It’s not my fault, it’s thermodynamics.”

You took another sip. “That sounds like something someone who just made a hockey puck would say.”

He looked mildly offended. “That pancake was brave. I'm proud of him.”

You laughed, a proper one, the kind that stretched through your chest like sunlight. God, you’d missed this after the past few days.

He turned back to the stove, mumbling something about “justice for pancake pioneers” while pouring more batter. You moved closer, setting your mug down on the counter and wrapping your arms around his middle from behind.

He stilled for half a second.

Then he melted into it, let out a breath like he’d been waiting to exhale all morning.

“You’re clingy,” he mumbled.

“You like it.”

“I love it.” He leaned his head back against your shoulder. “I really do.”

You pressed a kiss to his jaw, letting the quiet fill in the spaces between the moments.

He flipped the second pancake. Perfect golden brown.

“See?” he said proudly. “Told you.” A smug little smirk on his face appearing.

You peeked over his shoulder. “A scientific masterpiece.”

“Mmhm. Want the first one?”

You made a face. “Not if I want to live.”

He laughed softly. “We’ll bury it in syrup. You’ll never know.”

You didn’t even bother with plates. Just grabbed forks and ate side by side at the counter, knees bumping, syrup dripping on your fingers.

At some point, he turned to you, a bit of whipped cream on his nose.

“I was scared yesterday,” he said suddenly. “That I’d ruined it.”

You paused.

“Yeah?” you said softly.

He nodded. “I’m not used to someone staying after I mess up.”

You wiped the cream off his nose with your thumb, then leaned forward to kiss the spot you’d cleaned. “Good thing I’m not just someone.”

He looked at you like you were a miracle.

“You really aren’t.” He smiled at you, hand snaking around your waist, continuing feeding you.

At first you didn’t mean to end up in his lap.

It just sort of happened somewhere between the last stack of pancakes and the halfway point of your second coffee. Spencer had finished chewing a bite, looked at you like his brain had suddenly short circuited, and pulled you onto him with absolutely zero grace.

“You were too far away,” he mumbled like it explained everything.

Now your legs were straddling his thighs, knees bracketing either side of his hips, one of his hands resting at the small of your back while the other gripped a fork sticky with syrup.

His chair turned sideways next to the table so you can access his burnt pancakes.

“I’m literally right here,” you teased, stealing a strawberry from the side of his plate.

“Now you’re closer,” he said, deadpan but his eyes were warm, drifting lazily over your face like he still couldn’t believe you were here, touching him, his.

You reached for the next forkful he offered, leaned in to take it from his hand but not before quickly leaning up to his face, placing a soft, quick kiss on his lips.

He sucked in a breath through his nose. “That’s not fair.”

You grinned. “I’m not trying to be fair. I’m trying to ruin you.”

“You already have,” he muttered, not quite under his breath.

Your smile softened. “Spence…”

He looked down, fork paused between you. “I said a lot of things yesterday I didn’t mean.”

“I know.”

“I don’t want to be like that with you,” he added, voice quieter now. “I don’t ever want to talk to you like you’re… an opponent. You’re not. And I never should've said those hurtful things to you.”

You tilted your head, let your fingers rest lightly on his jaw. “I’m not going to pretend we’ll never argue again. But I do know you. And I know you didn’t mean it.”

He looked up at you then, really looked. “You always say the right thing.”

“I don’t.” You leaned your forehead against his. “But I mean everything I say to you.”

He offered you another bite, and you took it without looking away from him. Something about sharing food like this. Knees touching, eyes locked, sugar on your lips — made the air feel thick with softness.

You scooped some whipped cream onto your finger and gently tapped it onto the tip of his nose.

He blinked.

You grinned.

Then leaned in and kissed it off.

“You’re trying to kill me,” he whispered.

You kissed the corner of his mouth. “Just giving you a reason to stay alive.”

He held you tighter, his free hand running slowly up your back like he needed the reassurance of your bones. “I would’ve fallen apart last night if you didn’t let me come home with you.”

You kissed him again, slower this time. Letting his lips linger on yours for longer than a few seconds. "Then it’s a good thing I love you too much to let you fall apart alone.”

The fork clattered quietly onto the plate as he pulled you in fully, pressing his lips to yours in a way that said everything he was too scared to speak aloud. It wasn’t urgent. It was honest.

You fed each other in between kisses, alternating between giggles and deep, slow silences, syrup drying sticky between your fingers where they threaded into his hair. He looked at you like you were something rare. And you held him like he’d never been held right before.

Pancakes never tasted so sweet.

And neither did forgiveness.

[mytheoristavenue]

HTTYD - How to Know They Like You

Summary: There are always subtle hints that someone is smitten, but everyone is different!

Warnings: Fluff, quirky habits, no specific gender for reader, have not yet seen all the source material, so potentially OOC

Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III -

Avoids you like the plague to start with, for fear of embarrassing himself. Gets all stutter-y when you talk to him, and he gets embarrassed. Eventually, as he gets older, he grows out of it, but he still has to remind himself to breathe and speak clearly.

Puts a bit more detail into your gear when he makes you something. Most of the time, it's not noticeable, maybe as small as adding a tiny design element here and there. He just can't help but be a perfectionist when it comes to you.

Get more frustrated with you when you don't listen to him as a leader, but gives you more slack than everyone else. Will get annoyed increably quickly if you do something reckless, but will let it go with a stern roll of the eyes; however, if Snotlout does the same thing, he's getting an earful.

"You're so stubborn, you never listen- look, just be more careful next time, okay? Please?"

Astrid Hofferson -

Grooms you. She always braids your hair, fixes your jewelry, and smoothes your clothes. Her favorite thing is your hair, though. She'll sit beside you and absently weave braids and leather straps or other embellishments into it. Also likes to embellish your gear, such as wrapping your weapon handle in colorful leather.

Cooks for you, despite not being great at it. She's convinced you loved her Yaknog, and she consistently 'invents' new treats for you to try. She's always so excited, you can't help but respond with glee over your dread.

Always tries to give you advice. She loves when you ask her what she'd do in any given situation as it gives her an oppertunity to impress you with her intelligence and wisdom. She's also always down to spar with you to prove how strong she really is despite her smaller build.

"What's on your mind, hmm? C'mon, let's talk about it! No? Well... I know, let's get some energy out! You'll feel better!"

Fishlegs Ingerman -

Knows everything about your dragon, and if he doesn't, he'll be poring over all the texts he can find to learn more. He wants more than anything to be helpful to you and maybe teach you something you don't know.

Never stops talking to and about you. You're his favorite subject and he's an expert. His friends are so tired of hearing your name because all he does is ramble about you.

Will give you small things like pressed flowers, saying they remind him of you. Also once gifted you a flower crown but it felt apart due to his large hands being less than deft.

"Ah, jeez, (Y/N) smiled at me today, did you see? They have a snaggle tooth on the bottom row, have you guys ever noticed that?"

Ruffnut Thorston -

Bullies you relentlessly. She thinks she's flirting, but she's actually just being a bit mean. She's used to razzing her brother or her friends, even rejecting the occasional suitor, so she's not entirely sure how to show she likes you.

Will laugh at your every mistake until she snorts and point it out to others. Eventually, she realizes she's actually hurting your feelings and makes an effort to be sweet to you, though that mask slips quickly if anyone else mentions it.

Shows her affection by giving subtle flirts like winks, 'sultry' poses (she actually looks quite uncomfortable), and cheesy, condescending lines.

"Take a picture, will ya? I know I'm hot, but Gods, you don't have to stare!"

Tuffnut Thorston -

Collects/steals things he thinks you'd like. A shiny rock, a chicken feather, even small bones or dragon scales. He likes when you accessorize with the small trinkets he finds for you.

Goes out of his way to make you laugh- to the point of embarrassing himself. If he notices that you're down, he'll do anything to cheer you up, even if that means 'accidentally' getting hurt in the process.

Remembers that once he fell out of a tree, and you laughed so hard you cried hysterically. If little trinkets or dumb jokes down work, he'll try to recreate moments like that.

"Hey, (Y/N), why was the longboat so cheap? It was on sail, get it? No? Well, I watch this-!"

Snotlout Jorgenson -

Lays it on so thick. Cheesy lines, bragging about himself to impress you, the whole nine yards. Thinks he's the manliest, most macho master of flirtation (actually worse than Ruffnut by a long shot). Also thinks bullying Hookfang will impress you, for some reason.

Actually, very sweet when he's alone. He does the little 'they love me, they love me not' thing with flower petals and draws your initials in hearts in the snow or sand, also in the bark of trees. Hums little tunes about you under his breath when he's walking alone and whittles/carves little gifts for you.

Eventually, realizes you enjoy the softer side of him after you catch him in one of these moments and tries to let you see it more often. It's difficult, given the insecurities he has about masculinity due to his father, but it helps to know the person he craves from approval from most otherwise likes the parts of him he doesn't.

"H-Hey! Didn't see ya there! What was I doing? I-It's not important! No, don't look!"

[ev3luv]

Like this is very likely. This entire scenario sucks for will. Being in love thinking it it won't happen, just to find out that he's actually into you and has been lying this whole time. Weather Michael was confused whether he was in love with will or it was just a crush. This would be frustrating for will to find out while the world is ending. Will trying to take charge and kill vecna while seeing the way Mike looks at him and how close they're getting.... Seeing more signs of this. Once Michael makes it very obvious and makes sense for will to be a little pissed off and bitter. I think Michael kind of accepts will thinking he's a jerk. Mike will probably tell will "I don't expect you to forgive me" but at the same time "we can be together now" Michael will probably apologize a couple of times. The hints of this are interesting...

Fins Spotify he made the "STern" playlist.

ST likely meaning Stranger Things.

There's one song on there that reminds me of this exact scenario. Like literally to a tee!!!

Song (what do you want me to do? By pointed sticks)

The song basically is about a woman (Mike) who leaves her relationship to be with someone else (El) but the relationship didn't work out. So now she's crawling back to the person she knew originally (will)

The guy (will) is heartbroken that the woman went with some other guy, but now she's coming back to him???? That would be so hurtful and annoying!! Your emotions would be going all over the place!!! Thinking you lost someone just for them to come back around and say "hey, I actually love you too". 💀😡😤 like how dare you make me feel that heartbroken!!!! How dare you confuse me like that!!!!!!

Lyrics

You walked out, took your Chance

You turned your back on our romance

You said you found somebody new

You said the change'd do you good

(Will telling Mike you turned your back on me and left me behind to be with El)

But then the bubble burst your dream

It turned into a nightmare scream

You pushed until you nearly cracked

But now you say you want me back

Things got bad with El and it didn't turn like mike expected them to? So now you want me back??

What do you want me to do?

Say that I needed you more?

Is that but real lovers do?

Or only what you use before?

I needed you more than ever. I mean what more could I have offered. You want me to say I need you even more now, than I did before??

(Will is becoming more stronger, and growing into being a man. Not taking crap from anybody anymore. Will needed mike before but not as much now. At least in will's head.)

Will is basically saying you left me behind without thinking about how it would make me feel. You never let anything happen between the two of us when it could have. You never even let me think I could fight for you.. now you're "Crawling back begging for forgiveness" and for my love at the worst time possible. Wtf Mike...

After wills fight with Mike in season 3 will says "there's more important things to be worrying about right now." to Lucas. This mentality will most likely come back.

Michael's dumb and he can be very oblivious and as well as selfish. Couldn't even tell will that they could finally be together now, and Will's just like what the hell are you talking about?? I've been trying to get over you!!! After ripping off the Band-Aid!!

"Love makes you crazy in that damn stupid"

Yes stupid is very much the word!! 😡😤

Mike s5: "why won't he take me back?!?!" 😫😰😭 I'm sorry I was being a total asshole, can we please talk!!!"🤧😩😖

"This could be us!" 👨🏻‍🤝‍👨🏼🏳️‍🌈😘😭

Will : 😐🥺🤨😤😡😭

will tells mike to go fuck himself! will tells mike to go fuck himself! will tells mike to go fuck himself! will tells mike to go fuck himself! will tells mike to go fuck himself! will tells mike to go fuck himself! will tells mike to go fuck himself! will tells mike to go fuck himself!

[aviradasa]

So you know what frustrates me about going anywhere? Makeup.

My eyeliner was being a BITCH when getting ready for con.

But it got me thinking - since vampires can't see their reflection, how do they get ready?

If you please, I want a vampire grooming party of Poly!Lost Boys and SO getting ready for the night.

Marko doing her makeup, Paul helping with hair, David and Dwayne arguing over how she should dress for the evening (is it cold enough for a jacket, shorts or skirt, boots or heels?), whatever else you'd like.

Just some domesticity really, lol.

Ok, so full disclosure. This might suck cause I haven't written shit in MONTHS, but still, I hope you enjoy. I could not focus when making this, so if you see it switching from first person to third person, just know that I fully was very much confused and accidentally got to focused on my show playing in the background 😭

I love this request and even though im all for murdery evil vampires gotta love some cute domestic shit once in awhile 🖤 well anyways here is

Ps. Tumblr fucked up my paragraph spacing and I cant fix it 😭 also not proof read. Enjoy

Makeup help

Poly!tlb x new vampire!reader.

Pronouns used: (She/her)

Warnings: language (If I missed any, let me know)

Tag list: @theorizinganomaly @vxncevis @sillyturquoisepuffin @thelostsimp @adams-fav-roach @acotar-lover @angstinaofsantacarla @thatonegirl2 @gutlesscatherine

"Girl, you move one more time. i'm gonna draw a line across your face.” dwayne scolded as he was dangerously focused on getting the wing of her eyeliner just perfect. You were almost surprised he didn’t pull out a damn measuring tape at this point to make sure it was even.

“ ok that's not really my fault that's on him-OW ” I had retorted gesturing to Paul who in everyone's opinion was having too much fun teasing, spraying, and making sure you had the biggest and wildest hair out of the bunch. 

But his methods were as crazy as he was, and it was a constant tugging on my scalp. At one point, you almost thought you were gonna get tugged out of the chair you were currently seated in at your dining room table,now turned salon, apparently.

The boys were already done getting ready for tonight's adventure. But you were struggling. Thankfully, they were able to step up and give you a hand. Even if it included ripping your hair out and practically beating your face in with a beauty blender, possibly even stabbing your eye out if Paul didnt stop jerking your head around while dwayne was doing the best he could.

“Oh shush, it dont hurt that bad. You dont have anything to complain about.” Paul defends rolling his eyes with that cheeky mischievous grin on his face. He knew he could probably be a bit more gentle, but in his opinion, his methods were only effective when it was painful, so he didn't give a shit about any complaints you had.

“Man just cut the shit for 5 seconds. im almost done.” Dwayne muttered, finishing the last wing, the difficult part of your makeup being finished. He certainly was no expert when it came to makeup, but marko has insisted he do the liner cause he has the most steady hand, you didnt mind it at all either watching him try his best was hilarious and also kind of sweet especially when he would ask you or marko how to go about it.

“ Marko, it's your problem again.” He had joked slowly rising from his seat, not before sneaking a brief kiss to you cheek. Right as Marko sits back down, swatting him away from you like a dog. And to be fair, the look dwayne gave him in response fit the gesture well as he muttered something under his breath after as Marko added his last bit with a hint of amusement to his tone

“ok goodbye, i will tell you if i need you again.” he told him as he picked up a makeup brush. Your base was already done, but he still had to add the fun stuff. So, of course, his concentration was key. Though you just thought the whole interaction was silly

“ Hey, maybe you should go see what David's up to, I bet he's probably struggling.” I suggest to dwayne. It's not that I didn't trust David's judgments in cloathing, but I did have a few concerns. So luckily, dwayne took me up on the idea and reluctantly made his way down the hallway.

You see, i was the newest vamp of the group, and while i saw it as more of a blessing than anything else, it did come with its curses. AKA, the struggle of

The boys wanted to go out tonight with me. which was fine before there proved to be one problem.

I couldn't see myself in the mirror anymore. So, as they were all getting ready, I was sitting there struggling in my bathroom before I worked up the courage to ask for their help. Then, of course, they agreed, and I not only became their undead mannequin for the night but also apparently the victim of their fashion critiques. 

Apparently, they are experts all of a sudden.

“What the hell is this? We let her go outside in these?” david had immediately said to dwayne as he entered the room. Seeing david looking through my closet completely unamused.

“The colors clash, the material is cheap. That looks like she stole it off your ex girlfriends corpse from the 60s..” he carried on as he scrolled through the many hangers as dwayne just rolled his eyes at david last little comment and joined him by the closet door.

“ its not all like that though. There's a cute skirt right there.” He pointed out a black leather skirt that had ties holding it together on the side. “Yeah put that together with some fishnets, and some big ass boots and it will look great.”

Dwayne put together as he grabbed the skirt from the closet. Holding it up to look over for any imperfections.

“Paul gave her that you really want to give him more of an ego tonight?” giving him a look like that of a mother correcting a child in the grocery store. But in reality he was just petty and probably wanted to be right.

“Instead of giving you one? Always.” Dwayne replied with a small grin as he tossed the skirt onto the bed for consideration. Extremely proud of himself for finding it. Leading both him and david down a rabbit hole of digging through every piece of clothing i own apparently.

Back in the dining room was controlled chaos. My makeup was finished and now I was Instead helping Marko paint his nails all while getting my hair tugged at. He could have very well painted them himself but he didnt feel like it, so the job was given to you.

“Paul i swear to god if you yank my hair one more time i'm gonna hurt you.” I sat giving him an empty threat as I was suddenly yanked back only able to lift the nail polish brush away from Markos hand by a second.

“ Hey how the hell do you think i get to look this awesome every night. Time and pain. Suck it up girl.” He defends with a little laugh as he sets down his torture devices- (hair tools) before gently fluffing up some spots with his fingers. Surprisingly he was quite the perfectionist when it came to how his work looks on you.

“Ok flip it and shake your head. And it should be done.” He says taking the nail polish from your hands handing it back to marko so he can finish them himself. Once you flip your hair down for a few last details Paul's fluffs up the bottom a bit more, and as you shake it out he almost drowns you in how much hairspray he used, but to your surprise when you flip it back up you're pleasantly surprised with how nice it feels, yeah you can't see it but by what your can feel it is big and fabulous, just like you wanted.

“Holy shit thats amazing! Thank you.” you tell him With a huge smile reaching over i yank him into a hug as thanks. Not only was I happy with the results, but also that my head was finally free and I no longer felt like I was being scalped. 

“Thank you thank you, I know i did awesome as usual.” He replied proudly casually sitting back in one of the chairs next to me after being released from my grip. he was about to put his feet up on my table but I shut that down before it even started. Sometimes he wondered if your jokes about having eyes everywhere were actually true of not.

“Paul I swear to god if you put your feet on my table I will cut them off.” I warn as I go back to markos nails he had gotten about halfway done with his other hand but your wanted to finish what you started and he really appreciated it. Paul on the other hand decides to heed your warning though and keeps his boots planted firmly on the floor.

“Oh hell no”

“What even is that?”

“Nope burn this.” 

Is all that can be heard from my bedroom.

You see what started as arguing over what to dress me in just ended up in them both judging and roasting your wardrobe together. By this point they have been through almost everything having picked out only the skirt and boots so far. And as david flicked through the closet dwayne was in the dresser seeing if there's anything he could work with

“What about this?” Dwayne asked tossing a simple black tank top at David which he surprisingly caught.

“ That could work, it's simple. I like it.” He replied tossing it onto the bed with a shrug. To be completely fair he couldn't care less what you wore tonight. He just wanted to go out there, fuck up some people's night and do whatever else there is to do, and as funny as going through your stuff was he was bored of it and just wanted to get a move on.

“Ok so that's an absolute no.” Dwayne replied to him in a smart ass tone going back to digging in the drawer 

“ what do you mean? Its quick and easy. It will work”

“Oh yeah sure, cause quick and easy gets the job done just lovely, wait a minute are your roots showing right there?”

“Fuck off.” David remarked obviously not very amused by the comment as he pulled out a jacket from the back of your closet tossing it onto the bed as the last sort of finishing touch right before Dwayne threw a new shirt down, snatching up the old one.they both have to agree that they did pretty good

After they were done tweaking a few things they finally went to go collect you from the other two who were now currently just hanging out and vibing to the music you had put on prior while the three of you work on cleaning up your dining room  making sure all the hair stuff,makeup and anything else of the sort were put back properly.

“ Hey we got some clothes set out for you.”

David tells you as he and Dwayne exit the room looking rather proud of themselves to tell you the truth,and you weren't sure whether or not you should be excited or terrified. So you went with a mix of both. Giving them both a quick thank you, you give David a brief kiss on the cheek before wandering off towards your room. 

If you were surprised about Paul or marko being able to do hair and makeup for you you were just as if not more surprised at how well those two threw something together so fast that actually looked really nice to you, and once you put it on you really wish you could have seen it. Cause you felt amazing. 

Not just because of your look, but because of how much you appreciated those 4. They really stepped up and helped you tonight so you could have fun with them and be confident while doing so and it meant more to you then they knew.

So when you stepped out of the room after grabbing your purse and other random crap you may need you were practically jumping with excitement. 

And as you all excited the apartment you didn't give a damn about anything else, not even the fact that your neighbors probably wouldn't be to thrilled about the group of teenagers running through the hallways of your building whooping and hollering for the beginning of the night just beginning, or the aftermath of them deciding to do tricks on the bikes in the parking lot. 

Not one shit given. You were immortal now, and even though it came with some pesky challenges, you have everything you need. 4 asshole vampires and an infinite food supply called Santa Carla

[bewitched-hours]

Hope you're having a nice day :D

I'm here to ask for a part 2 for the god!reader x Telamon/Shedletsky after they got reunited in the cabin. I don't really have an idea for the plot but maybe you could include some wing preening if you'd like. Maybe now that they're both like normal robloxians they can pay more attention to their emotions and somehow find out that they like eachother. (Bonus points for hugging or cuddling with wings! 😋)

Ps: maybe Builderman knowing what's happening and just watching almost frustrated from how the ex gods don't know how to deal with love (bc he both knew them before they got forsaken ofc)

Thanks a bunch! ^ ^

Ask for a part 2 and you shall receive~ Part 1

Reader gets- once again- She/They-

It had only been a few days but the others were painfully aware that something switched...

Especially Builderman, who could only groan when you both pulled him aside to ask if he knew all along because- well- he had been friends with you both back in the day...

You were both dramatically shocked about it when he nonchalantly explained how he knew but wasn't interested in drama so he wanted to watch you two figure yourselves out.

It was... Actually quite comical, you had to admit-

But now that you and your old friend were reunited, you decided to make the most of it and not dwell on the betrayal of Builderman keeping silent. Though neither of you seemed to really have a grasp on more complex human emotions so when you inevitably felt a crush growing, you didn't know how to act. This emotion was so foreign to you, like an unfamiliar warmth you didn't know wether to welcome or not.

But much to your luck, Shed wasn't much better at understanding this.

He'd do little gestures like draping a wing over you which would prompt you to do the same to him or shielding each other from rain on the odd times that it actually rained in- and outside of rounds. It was building habits that he perceived as intimate while you doubted yourself and felt awkward to try and do it right. He never seemed to get it but you also didn't get his occasional behaviour changes that seemed to appear randomly.

But Builderman was painfully aware...

You don't even know how it happened when it suddenly became habit for you both to preen each other's wings regularly. You found it comforting and tried every which way to tell yourself it wasn't romantic but that didn't help the fact your wings would visibly relax around him or how you would almost always fall asleep by the time he was done preening and vice versa.

It was so PAINFULLY obvious but no one dared to say a word about it even when you'd fall asleep on top of each other in the main cabin.

Chance tried to bring it up once but your display of obvious denial and oblivion had him trying to get info from Builderman to help set you two up officially.

"No- Chance..." He was already exhausted when Chance came to him and holding his filled coffee mug. But Chance was just ranting while you and Shed were off preening each other's wings again.

"Oh, come on! You can't tell me they aren't so obviously in denial!" They said in frustration, tempted to storm over to your cabin and confront you and Shedletsky both. But Builderman luckily held him back. "They need to figure this out on their own, you know how [Reader] feels about being called out on this."

Chance couldn't help but groan, their coin held tight in their hand as they looked towards the door outside. "Can't we at least talk to Shedletsky? He'd probably take it better!" They attempted to convince the admin stubbornly, showing they wouldn't let it go until something happens.

Builderman only sighed in exasperation, shaking his head as he thought about it. You'd be too bashful to admit you were crushing on your fellow ex-god but Shedletsky was probably more oblivious about the fact you two looked like a couple...

"Alright fine, we can talk to Shed tomorrow but I don't want you complaining about how he reacts, got it?" He finally let the gambler go, who seemed pretty ecstatic at the solution. "You won't hear a word! Promise!"

And true to his word, they both confronted Shedletsky during a round where the three of them were already downed and Shed was just watching you evade the killer in your mockingly playful way. Luckily it wasn't one of the children though since you tended to let them catch you instead of using your usual taunts. They were just kids in your eyes so you felt bad about mocking them.

"Shed... Can we talk?" Builderman propped himself up against the back of the couch Shedletsky was sitting on while Chance promptly plopped himself down beside the chicken man.

Shedletsky was a little confused but shrugged as he looked back towards the TV screen to cheer you on. "Shoot!"

Chance stifled a chuckle at the reaction. Ironic considering how they were planning to start this off. "Well~ I think it's pretty obvious how close you and [Reader] have become~" He spoke cheerfully, watching Shedletsky's earwings twitch at the mention of your name and turning a bit more focus towards the two in confusion.

"Well yeah, we're old friends and we're catching up on each other's lives while making sure the other is taken care off. A mutually beneficial friend-" He was gonna deny it just like you did and before Builderman could stop it, Chance shushed him.

"It really isn't a friendship, Shed. I've got little idea about birds, let alone ex-gods, but preening is strictly a couples thing for birds and I doubt it's much different for gods." They saw Shedletsky get a little flustered at their words but Builderman pushed their hat down before they could continue to get his turn.

With a sigh, Builderman continued. "What we're saying... Is that we're glad to see you two happy but to please talk about your relationship together because [Reader] is clearly too bashful and in denial to notice it's mutual-"

"Mutual?!" Shedletsky puffed up, seeming genuinely surprised. That brought an extended silence to all three of them.

Chance was first to break it in shock. "YOU DIDN'T KNOW????" The gambler couldn't believe it. They had figured Shedletsky knew it was mutual and was probably just uncertain if you knew but now?

Now it was just ridiculous.

"I-I just figured they liked the comfort and-" Shedletsky sighed, chuckling awkwardly as his rambling was stopped by the round ending and you returning with a victorious cheer.

"And that's another win to the survivors!" You exclaimed, almost subconsciously making your way over to the trio with a giant grin on your face. "Did you guys see me?! John's spikes got nothing on me!" You were still filled with adrenaline and didn't realise their looks as Shedletsky nodded and awkwardly smiles at your excitement.

But the moment you went back to celebrate with Elliot and the others, Shed seemed to deflate a bit. "How am I meant to even bring this up???" Suddenly, his tone had changed to be a little more nervous...

"I'm- I'm sure we can help you figure it out. Just try to stay calm and act natural and-" Chance tried to help but was promptly silenced again by Builderman. "No no no, just make sure you talk about it when you're both comfortable. Last thing you need is to make [Reader] anxious by acting 'natural'." He gave Shedletsky a somewhat sympathetic pat on the shoulder as he sighed and nodded, much to both Builderman and Chance's satisfaction.

Sure enough, he waited until you were both in his cabin with him preening and you getting visibly more drowsy. "Hey, [Reader]...?" His voice was soft but you reacted regardless, your wings twitching slightly when his hands stopped moving to show you were listening.

"I'm sure this might be sudden but... Do you think about romance... At all?" You seemed to tense up but by the way your wings stayed relaxed, Shedletsky knew you weren't uncomfortable. Rather... You were flustered...

You were immediately wide awake with rosy cheeks and fidgeting with your hair. "Ah... Maybe? It's a bit hard to understand but yeah..." You tried to play it off, though you were definitely nervous. You didn't know how he felt now how-

Then he suddenly placed a kiss on your wing that made you freeze up as your wings shortly puffed up. "Are you-"

"I know, I know but listen! It's probably either now or never that we get to talk about it... And I may have spoken with Chance and Builderman to find out it was mutual..." Your breath caught in your throat, making a mental note to give those two some... Choice words later... But for now, you had feelings to sort.

"So... How long have you felt this way...?" You sheepishly asked, biting your lower lip as thoughts ran through your mind. But Shed just chuckled awkwardly and shrugged. "I've noticed shortly after I realized you were- well- you. But I'm sure I've felt it even before... And you?" He seemed to test the waters. A playful tone sneaking into his words as he tried to see wether you were comfortable going a little less serious and it brought a smile to your face.

"First noticed back when we were gods. One of my followers had used art as an offering and I realized I liked the thought of us being a package deal but didn't want it to be known... Though I did give that follower my blessing that day." You giggled, following his playfulness in tone as you leaned back slightly.

"But how mean of you to never notice~" You teased, teasing the tension as Shed stifled his laughter and finished up on preening your wings. "Yeah, well, what can you expect from a god like Telamon?" He asked with a raised eyebrow, as if the answer was obvious.

You just turned around to face him and steal a quick kiss as your wings wrapped around him. His wings tried the same but he had to settle on placing his wings further down your back while yours sat right below his neck. "From gods to fools~ But we got there." You chirped, now in a cuddling position on his bed as you two whispered sweet declarations of love, praise and teases.

Yeah... Maybe love was easier than you had thought...

Anything you'd like to request/ask? Check out my pinned post first and I'll be happy to write up whatever you want!

[the-exiled-comic]

You're Starclan's strongest soldier for leaving comments on most of your work. People are so weird (and rude tbh) about how they comment on this comic. I always see stuff like people wishing your characters harm, and even wishing some characters death. Or even just commenting callously on complex characters or arcs, as if you're obligated to make every cat a "good person."

I'm not articulating my thoughts well, but it's just really disappointing to see comments that are so shallow and antagonistic, especially when there's so much character development to enjoy and discuss instead. I think there are so many unique characters in this comic, including characters who have serious flaws and do bad things. That makes them and their place in the narrative interesting! It means I can be angry, or frustrated, or saddened by their actions and outcomes, and that's so cool! That's just good storywriting! Anyway thank you for writing really unique characters that make me feel things. I look forward to how they will continue to make this story more and more interesting!

yeah i feel like i have beat the dead horse (that isn't dead until people remember the point of book reports in school) by talking about it so much, and i don't want to be the creator who's always lamenting about their audience. it just feels negative and reductive. but. commenting... it is a thing that i really wish people would try to think more about.

stuff like bad faith takes, commenting without reading, trying to subvert where the narrative is going/being contrarian, etc, etc. it just hurts not only the author of the comic but also the other authors who see those comments and get discouraged about their own work. the people who see that the readers can't understand a complicated dilemma, and decide to dumb theirs down so that it's easily understood and that they don't receive backlash for being controversial

no one wants stories like that. no one wants more bland "oh gosh im so sorry i hurt you with my feelings, generational trauma is so hard but im glad everything is all better now!" modern disney stories that can't tell anything but a basic "maybe no ones really bad... let's be friends and fix it together with forgiveness" moral.

if you want more good stories you have to know how to see one and you gotta trust the passionate people trying to make them. not saying the exiled is top tier, it's really flawed in its own way. but there are sooooo many wonderful webcomics with complex narratives and messaging that makes you think and feel. that are greeted with "the character did a bad and its not woke??" and it makes me sad, because you gotta be kidding me. be real with yourself. admit when you see flawed, dirty, emotive characters who screw up, that you feel something way more than you do the ones that do everything right the first time and never struggle.

[fanged-fanfics]

Hi! Could you take a request for LEGO Monkie Kid? One featuring Sun Wukong × female reader [romantic], where the reader is a demon hunter, similar to a Demon Slayer. She's beautiful, talented, and kind—and Wukong ends up falling head over heels for her

☆ It's A Dangerous Game, You and I — Wukong x Demon Hunter!Fem Reader ☆

Genre: Fluff || she/her pronouns for reader || No warnings needed

A/N: This ended up being a sort of rivals/enemies to lovers route- I hope that works for the idea you had!

──────.𖥔 ݁ ˖˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ──────

Sun Wukong. Radiant Wukong, brilliant Wukong, shines like the sun and hero to China Wukong. These days, especially around Pigsy's Noodles, it felt like you couldn't go five minutes without hearing someone singing his praises. It felt like the King's golden light had a grip on the entirety of Megapolis. But you knew better. No matter how convincing the radiant disguise, a demon was still a demon. And that made him your most infuriating target

Countless hours spent tracking him down, following his trail of shallow pride and gold glimpses of his energy. It felt like a battle of wits. With great annoyance, you had come to the realization that he was toying with you. The way he'd give you that pointed smile of amusement, telling you he hopes to meet you again— it was sickening. How could he belittle you like this? Why was he so insistent on pretending to be this kind hero?

Currently, you are in the forest of Flower Fruit Mountain. The leaves rustled with weight hopping between them, branches bending before the figure among them bounced to the next. You spun around, following the movement as best you could. Then, all at once, a flash of orange fur. The second grass crunched as he hit the ground, you swung around and ran to him. Your shoulder connected with his chest, and he toppled back onto the grass. "Sun Wukong" You began firmly, shoe planting in the center of his chest— not hard, just enough to keep him still. His brows upturned and he gave you a small smile "You're getting a lot faster-" he grunted "Good job"

"I don't need compliments from you" You scoffed at him. He chuckled, a hand reaching up to hold your leg. "Awh, I'm hurt" he said with a fake frown "I thought if I let you win, you'd cheer up a bit". "Let me-?" You repeated suspiciously. Your words were cut short when he suddenly pushed you back, causing you to stumble as he lifted himself from the ground. "I've been doing this for, what, six centuries?" Wukong said, his tail wrapping around your waist. You looked up, seeing his golden eyes staring right into yours, with that stupid soft smile back on his face

"Maybe you should do your homework before fighting the monkey who took on heaven, eh, gorgeous?" He asked, only becoming more amused seeing your frustrated expression. You turned out of his hold, stepping back with a deep huff. "Why play this game?" You asked, pointing your weapon "Do you demons really enjoy playing with your food that much?"

"Food?" Wukong asked, a hearty chuckle coming from him "Ah, no. I'm not that type of demon. I usually eat whatever I can make" he said. To illustrate his point, he plucked out a strand of hair to blow on. After a brief flash of gold, he held a medium sized box in his hands, topped with a bow. He held it out to you "Here, try some. You must be hungry after all that running"

"I'm not gonna eat your hair" you replied, stepping back a bit more "What's it gonna do? Turn me to stone? Give me claws and fangs like you?". "Uhh.. it might give you a stomach ache if you eat it too fast?" Wukong guessed, looking over the box "I don't know, it's never been an issue for me or the kid". "You fed those to MK?" You asked, completely appalled. "Well yeah, he gets hungry during training" Wukong said. He then shrugged, holding the box close. "Look, if you don't want it-"

"Hand it over" you interrupted, holding your hand out. Wukong raised an eyebrow, smug once more. He passed it over, and you almost snatched it from his hold. Opening it, you found nothing but neatly organized mantou with a pineapple bun on the side, finished off with the inclusion of youtiao. None of it looked off, and if anything it smelled great. You closed the lid, keeping it in your hands "I'll make sure you didn't tamper with it. Who knows what kind of tricks you're capable of". "If that makes you happy, go for it" Wukong shrugged

You rolled your eyes, beginning to walk back the way you came. Clearly this Monkey King was trying to get on your good side, but why? Maybe you couldn't take him down yet, but analyzing his 'gifts' would be a good start. And it did smell really good... maybe a bite or two wouldn't hurt. Just to see if it's got anything inside it! Maybe he tricked the taste or something! Yes yes, all a very practical search, you reassured yourself. Indulgence for the greater good!

Wukong watched as you went, fondness in his gaze. You were so cute when you got all grumpy like that. It felt nice to have you so close, even if for only that short moment. He wasn't blind to your intentions, he knew you sought to win over him. He sighed, a hand coming up to rest on his chest, feeling the way his heart was beating. Little did you know, you'd won over something else entirely

[celli-ohs]

i'll wait here tomorrow

pairing: choi soobin x reader

genre: collegeau!, parenthoodau!, angst, nsfw, fluff

previous: and then i'll leave without a trace

synopsis:from the moment you two made eye contact he hasn't been the same. it's like you've got him completely under your spell, not that he was complaining. when he wants to be more than a stranger in your bed you push him further away. choi soobin has what it takes to be your lover and more, he's sure of it. but after all he's done for you, was it worth all the pain and frustration?

word count: 17.3k

warnings: mentions of drinking alcohol, intoxication, foul language, stds and other sexual diseases, depression, parenting struggles, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, sex while inebriated, voyeurism, sex while pregnant, oral sex (m&f receiving), and breeding kink

playlist: i'll wait here tomorrow

taglist: @lesbiansforseonghwa @boobs4soobs @feet4liferss @jungmeowz @sooblogsstuff @soobinieswife @run2min @satoruismo @whoisgami @walmartshopper00 @thyunzzn @starlightwoo @w0nderfulb1iss @apmcake @tearfulpotatozuri @soobinz-wife @beomgyusluver @soobinslvr13 @hyunj00 @hyeoniemoon @akiyollyllyell @binvhs @jjhmk @soobsfairy444 @mey-archive @soobmeongie @kexiksexik @giegiemon @angelgraphica @yamamasjumpercables @imnotsureokay @sanscupid @cami-martinie-blog @hanamiwa1414 @mikitaxt @lostgirlysstuff @lunaryoongie

note: tada! the long awaited part two of atilwat has arrived! I'm very happy with how this came out, i've been grueling over this fic forever now and i can confidently say this and atilwat are my magnum opus of 2025!! (also this is not proof read sorry) i hope you guys enjoy it, it's a bit long so take some time to read! also p.s. today is my birthday! i've been trying hard to release this on time, i wanted to celebrate with this lmao. but thank you for all the support an love towards this series, i really appreciate everyone who thugged it out with me bc ngl i was going through it with school and work, which really affected my writing time and abilities. but we made it!! let's go! cheers and happy reading!!

Soobin doesn’t know where he’s going. He’s been driving down various roads for how long now. He just knows he needs to get away from you.

Was he being immature? Rude? Irresponsible? Yes, but so were you.

He’d just confessed his undying love for you, expressing how you mean the world and more to him, and all you did was dismiss him. You lied straight to his face.

While he was usually level-headed, like any normal person he has a breaking point. And today was that day.

Without much of a thought, his feet took him outside and into his car, and Soobin began to drive.

It’s been 20 minutes since he left the apartment. He contemplates turning around.

But as he stops at a red light he closes his eyes and as if it’s been burned into his retinas, he sees your crying face. You’re shaking your head as you refuse to face him. 

“No I don’t,” You whisper.

The sound of your voice echoes inside his brain, it's haunting.

The car behind him honks, and Soobin’s eyes shoot open. The light is green now.

He begins driving again, farther and farther away.

Maybe this was for the best, he thinks to himself. He’s been entranced by you the moment you two first locked eyes, this could be him finally waking up from the illusion you presented him.

Another 45 minutes later Soobin pulls into the parking garage of his sister’s apartment complex, putting his car into park and turning off the ignition. 

He noticed during his drive that the sky was pitch black, not a single star up above.

Soobin can’t even bring himself to leave the car. He sits in the driver’s seat, quiet and alone. And all he can think about is how you’ve made a permanent home in his heavy heart.

With a sigh, he closes his eyes and leans back into his seat, jaw clenched as he tries to figure out where it all went wrong.

Wedding bells.

That's the first thing Soobin hears when you two make eye contact for the first time. They’re loud, rattling his brain. Or maybe that was just the music blasting from the speaker right by his ears.

He’s currently forced up against the wall of some random’s living room, gripping his red solo cup of Sprite for dear life, all alone. 

Yeonjun has ditched him to lock himself in a vacant room with a girl he just met. Taehyun and Beomgyu are stoned out on the balcony, and Kai’s thighs are currently a comfy seat for a pretty little freshman with bleach blonde hair.

And Soobin was pulled into this mess to be the designated driver.

He’s in an uninteresting conversation with a couple of classmates he kinda knew when his eyes linger to observe the crowd. 

He’s taller than 98% of the people here, (the other 2% were getting their dicks wet) so it immediately catches his eyes when he notices someone the same height as him, maybe even taller.

It takes him a second but he realizes you’re in fact not taller than him, but instead you’re sitting on the kitchen counter surrounded by friends.

Your side profile seems to glow as you’re turned away from the yellow ray of the ceiling light of the kitchen. You’re in nothing but a short denim skirt and a floral hand tied halter top. Your hair flows down your back in waves as you tuck a lock behind your ear. 

He’s so busy admiring you, he doesn’t realize you’ve turned away from your conversation with your friends and caught him in the act. 

Your eyes are intense, even in the dimly lit room. It’s like you can read his thoughts, his soul, his desires. Pair that with your plump and juicy lips seducing him, your messy hair framing your face.

One look from you and Soobin is sold.

He feels his heart begin to race, his cheeks heating up it’s almost painful. His hands are sweaty and his throat closes up. He has to look away, but his eyes find their way back to you. 

You’re unmoving, gaze trained on him like a lioness on a hunt for her prey.

Soobin chugs his soda, and for the sake of his life he excuses himself from his acquaintances, and hurriedly rushes down the hall to the bathroom. 

After forcing a couple out, he leans against the bathroom counter with his head in his hands. There’s only one thing on his mind and it’s shaped identically to you, the mysterious girl sitting on the kitchen counter.

Soobin looks at himself in the mirror, yet he can’t since it’s covered in watermarks and slightly scratched in the center. But he looks at his reflection regardless, trying to control himself. Even he’s never seen himself look this… disturbed. With a sigh and scratch of the head, he stands back up.

Was there such a thing as love at first sight?

The look of fear, confusion, and surprise is apparent on your face as you wake up. Soobin didn’t expect you to remember last night, mainly because he had little memory of the events that led to this moment as well. But seeing your expression harden at the sight of him had his stomach turning in unpleasant ways.

He can’t seem to pinpoint the reason for your reaction though. Maybe it’s because you were hungover, maybe you didn’t want him here, or maybe it’s because you’ve caught him in the act of trying to leave. He’d already slipped on his shirt. 

You suddenly begin to cough and turn away, trying to get your throat under control.

He doesn’t know why, but Soobin waits for you to stop, there’s an inkling of worry building inside him as your coughs begin to subside. 

“Fuck, my throat is so dry,” You croak, voice crackly as you were fresh from sleep. Soobin’s head swivels away before you turn back around, unable to even look in your general direction.

He reaches over and picks up his pants from the floor and quickly pulls them on. He glances at you, your attention is now on your blankets as you rub the sleep from your eyes.

“I-I’m sorry,” He sputters out, unaware he’s even apologized until you look up at him in surprise. You blink, likely processing this information. 

“Why?” You ask him. You’re hugging your blanket protectively against your chest, your hair is sticking out in random directions, and you still have remnants of last night’s makeup on your face.

Despite all of this, your eyes still hold the same intensity from last night. Pair that with the warm bright sun peeking through your window and the softness of your sheets. It’s a view that Soobin never imagined he’d witness, a juxtaposition to yesterday’s setting, yet his heartbeat speeds up nonetheless.

“For what happened. It’s a little weird, don’t you think?” Soobin shuffles in his place. He stuffs his hands into his pockets as you both are stuck in silence. He waits for your answer patiently.

You suddenly scoff, a smirk lacing your lips as you run a hand through your messy hair. “Is this your way of telling me you gave me something?”

Just like that, Soobin's calm facade crumbles. “No! Oh God, no!” He immediately shakes his head, like an excited dog’s tail. Is that what he made it seem like?! Soobin was clean- he was sure of it. He wasn’t the type to sleep around, and he went to every yearly check up-

Your laughter has him quickly realizing this was a joke.

 “I’m joking,” You chuckle, lips curved up in a smile. Soobin sighs, his stress levels lowering. As you giggle to yourself, Soobin quietly watches as he finishes pulling on his socks. You have a pretty smile, and an even prettier laugh.

You look up at him again from your spot on the bed, and Soobin swears his heart skips a beat, a single smile from you could heal all of his problems.

“Don’t take what happened last night too seriously, it’s not like we’re dating or anything.”

Those words specifically have Soobin’s fantasy disappearing faster than a plume of smoke. 

The air suddenly grows stiff and stale, it’s like time has suddenly stopped and trapped him inside of your room.

He’s ashamed to have even thought he had a chance with someone like you. Of course, he was nothing but a good fuck to have around. You could have anyone, you’d probably pick someone more entertaining and social than himself. To you, this was simple fun.

So Soobin just nods, grabbing his wallet and keys off the floor and excuses himself.

“Wait, you slept with L/n Y/n?!” Beomgyu sounds flabbergasted as Soobin takes a giant bite of his pizza. He nods innocently as he chews.

His friends all look at one another. It was rare for Soobin to have romantic feelings for someone, even rarer for him to date, but to sleep with a complete stranger? That was practically unheard of.

“Was she good?” Taehyun asks shamelessly, he leans over the table, wanting to hear every detail. Soobin shrugs. “No idea, I can’t remember a thing.” His friends groan, disappointed and annoyed. 

“Then how do you know you guys even slept together?” Beomgyu argues, stealing some of Yeonjun’s french fries. “I mean I woke up in her bed, bare ass naked, I’m pretty sure we fucked.” Soobin scoffs before he takes a sip of his soda.

“Or! You two went to sleep and later got really hot so you both stripped and slept naked?” Kai suggested. “Yeah, like that’d be possible.” Yeonjun chews with his mouth open.

Soobin rolls his eyes. “Can we stop talking about this? It was a one time thing, she made that very clear.” He sounds almost sulky as he says this, taking another bite.

His friends shrug and change the subject back to their original topic: how Beomgyu ended up almost getting arrested last night.

Soobin wasn’t exactly following along with his best friend’s grandiose story. If he was being honest, he didn’t know your name until today. His friends had obviously figured out Soobin had ditched his position as DD that night, but had no idea as to why.

When he revealed the reason, all he had to do was describe you for the boys to immediately know who you were.

Apparently you were one of the best friends of Yu Jimin, Lee Heeseung’s ex and current girlfriend to Shin Ryujin. You didn’t necessarily have a reputation, but you were known to have a big personality and lots of friends, aka the exact opposite of him. You would never in a million chances hang out with someone the likes of Soobin.

As he’s lost in thought mindlessly eating, he feels his phone vibrate in his back pocket. He pulls it out to see an unknown number calling. He reads over the contact, it seems familiar.

“Who is it?” Kai asks. Soobin shrugs, answering it. “Hello?” He clears his throat.

“Hey, is this Soobin’s number?”

The sound of your voice has him standing straight up at the table, knocking his chair over in the process. It’s so abrupt he causes Yeonjun to jump in his seat.

“Y-Yes, yeah this is him,” He prays he doesn’t sound stupid. You're quiet on the other line, as if you’re thinking. He hears you hum, there’s some shuffling.

“It’s Y/n. Do you think you could spare me a minute?”

Soobin could spare you more than a minute. He could spare you an hour, a day, a week, the rest of his life if you wanted. Of course if it meant he got to see you like this.

Your tight little crop top is now pulled up over your breasts, your panties pushed to the side as Soobin’s raw cock slips in and out of your heat like a mad man. You lay underneath him with your legs wide open, moaning as you grip his sheets, eyes fully rolled back. 

What started as a simple conversation about last week ended with you both fucking like two dogs in heat.

“Harder,” You moan, eyes blown out as you selfishly cry for a release. Soobin does as he’s told, because right now with the way you look under him, he’d be a fool to not listen.

“Kiss me.” You order again, and Soobin dives in, snatching your lips in a tantalizing sloppy kiss. You’re so soft, warm and inviting, he can’t resist you at all. It’s like he’s been put under a spell the second you entered his life.

He feels you clenching around him and Soobin lets out a whine, how the hell did he spend an entire night with you and now he can’t even last 10 minutes?!

He doesn’t get the chance to figure out the answer, because you suddenly push him away.

Immediately Soobin begins to panic.

“W-What- Why’re you-” He’s cut off when you push him against the mattress, your hands dance their way to his hard yearning dick, and you begin to tease him. 

“How does a quiet guy like you have such a big fucking cock?” You mutter as you begin to pepper kisses across his face. Your question has Soobin feeling both embarrassed and proud. He thought he was pretty average.

“I- didn’t know- ah!” Soobin gasps when you delicately run a finger over his tip. The feeling of you leaning over him, your chest pressed against his, your legs tangled together, and your soft gentle hands rubbing his hard on, Soobin can’t think straight. 

You distract him even further by littering his neck with hickeys, earning more and more soft whimpers from him. 

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum,” Soobin grunts, eyes closed shut as you jerk him off. His announcement has you sitting up again, your hand moving faster and faster.

“Cum for me baby,” You urged, your voice so sweet and alluring. He feels you kiss his tip and that completely sends him over the edge. 

Soobin can feel his body shake as he cums, he’s out of breath and as he comes down from his high, you’re still sucking his cock. 

His chest is rising and falling dramatically as he finally opens his eyes to take a peek at you.

You’re looking up at him with those innocent eyes, tongue tracing the length of his softening dick. You pause and lick your lips, before asking him a simple question.

“My turn?”

Everything about you has Soobin in pure awe. From the gentle curves of your body to the fine details of your soft eyelashes, he observes you as you sleep soundly in his arms. 

You two were currently cuddling in his bed, you’re smushed against his side while he cradles you like a doll.

Well, it was more like you passed out from exhaustion after Soobin pounded you for almost 2 hours straight to be exact.

But you look absolutely too adorable right now for Soobin to not admire you. Your little snores make him smile, and the way you fit perfectly into his favorite hoodie has his heart fluttering. 

He’s no longer watching TV, but he doesn’t care because he’s already seen the entire series twice now. All of his attention is focused solely on you. 

It’s not very often he gets to see you like this.

Usually after spending time together, you had a habit of either leaving as soon as possible or kicking him out. This would mark the first time you ever spent actual time with him. 

In a peculiar way, Soobin finds it entertaining to see you act so docile and vulnerable with him. It’s an odd juxtaposition to how you act in bed: bratty and bossy. 

You like to be manhandled, but always have something to say to him. Whether it be instructing him how to eat you out, telling him to shut up, and most often, teasing him to the edge, you always knew how to push his buttons. 

Soobin is unfortunately a pushover. He lets you do all these things in the hopes of you returning his budding feelings. 

Sure during sex he can be dominant if he wants, but really it’s because he knows you want it too. Your eyes are so telling. He can read you like an open book with a single look. 

So he also knows that you have no interest in him other than sex.

He hasn’t found the courage to ask you out on a real date yet, and his friends are horrible at convincing him that you’d say yes. 

You suddenly sigh and turn to lay on your back, head still tilted in his direction.

Soobin watches you as your breath regulates again, you’re still deep in your sleep. He brushes a stray hair out of your face and decides to get some rest too, finally closing his eyes. 

He dreams of you and wakes up hours later to an empty bed and his favorite hoodie missing.

Soobin doesn’t know exactly what entails in being someone’s fuck buddy. His friends have way more experience than him when it comes to doing these kinds of things, but this? No one ever warned him about this.

You assured Soobin that you two wouldn’t get caught, that no one would even know. And of course he listened, he trusted you. But when you pulled aside your bikini bottoms, sitting atop him and his hard cock, Soobin began to realize why you were insistent on doing this.

The thrill of others catching you two in the heat of the moment, it was enough to have him bucking his hips up into your cunt like a madman.

The water in the hot tub was already erupting with bubbles, add splashing of water from you bouncing on his cock and you had created a nasty sea storm. 

Your lips are locked onto Soobin’s your hair is wet and stuck to your skin, but neither of you could care less.

Soobin can’t believe it, your pussy was hotter and wetter than the actual jacuzzi, and he might actually lose his mind if you kept teasing him like this.

He can feel your erect nipple piercing through your thin bikini top, pressed against his chest. You’re whining against his mouth as you can’t seem to stop the movement of your hips.

His lips travel down to your exposed neck, and he suddenly decides he must cover you in marks. You’re moaning so loud right into his ear, it’s true music.

“Someone’s gonna hear you,” Soobin murmurs, as if he wasn’t also panting like a dog. “Why, you want them to join?” You laugh as you grind yourself on top of him. 

He doesn’t take your joke lightly, grabbing you by the ass cheeks as he slams you down harder onto his cock.

You have to bite your tongue to shut up, your face contorted in a mixture of pain and pleasure.

“No one gets to see you like this, only want you wet and pretty for me,” He growls into your ear, his jealousy rising at the mere thought of having to share you.

He’d rather consume you whole than even let a sliver of you be taken from him. And you let him devour you with no resistance.

u free tmrw? let’s grab coffee need to talk

Soobin reads your message over and over again as he sits in his car in the parking lot of the cafe you suggested.

He’d arrived a couple of minutes earlier than the time you agreed on, he was so worried that traffic would set him back that he left 15 minutes early. 

Luckily for him, there was no traffic, unluckily he didn’t want to seem too desperate so now he’s hiding out in his car.

But right now his heart is racing, his fantasy has turned into a reality. He was finally going on his first date with you. Granted, he didn’t get to ask you out like he’d originally planned, but he didn’t mind when you messaged him first. 

As he sits in his car, his attention is stolen by a familiar figure. You’re walking across the street to the cafe, looking gorgeous as ever. You’re in nothing but a simple pair of pants and a hoodie thrown on, your hair is a bit messy from the wind but he thinks you look perfect.

As you disappear from his view as you enter the cafe, Soobin looks down at his own outfit, suddenly feeling overdressed. Would you be able to tell he was excited?

He fiddles with his glasses, cleaning the lenses and adjusting them as they sit on his nose. After a few more minutes of stalling, Soobin takes a deep breath and exits his car.

Maybe you guys could go for a movie after, or maybe visit the river. He wanted to spend as much time with you as he possibly could.

Soobin slows to a stop as he approaches the large glass windows of the cafe to peek at you from outside. You’re sitting at a table tucked in the corner.

Leaning against your seat, you busy yourself by sipping your mug and looking around the cozy interior of the cafe. The warm lighting is so soft against the cold gray sky outside.

Snapping back into reality, Soobin builds the courage to finally walk to the front door. He opens it and steps inside, he’s greeted by the warm air and strong, dense smell of coffee. He barely hears the doorbell ring as he starts making his way towards you, wearing a shy smile and his heart on his sleeve.

Soobin notices your knees are facing the passenger door as he drives you back to your apartment. 

Actually, your entire body is leaning away from him, as if trying to jump out of the car as soon as possible.

Soobin holds in a sigh as he tries to focus on the road ahead, but it’s hard when he’s trying not to have a mental breakdown. All because just one hour ago you’d made a confession: you were pregnant with his child. 

You’d dropped the bomb at the cafe, successfully crumbling all of Soobin’s expectations.

The music plays softly in the background and fills the void as you two drive in silence. But there’s a lump in Soobin’s throat that is fighting to get out. He wants to say something, needs to.

He promised you he’d be there for you, that he’d be a helping hand. Soobin didn’t need to read your eyes to know you didn’t believe him. And if he were being honest, Soobin wasn’t sure if he could believe himself either. 

A baby. His baby.

There was so much that came with bringing life into the world, and as a college student, Soobin wasn’t sure if he was ready for that.

He’s not even sure why he agreed to support you if he were honest. You just looked so scared, so vulnerable, he couldn’t bear to see you so helpless.

You said you would give the baby up for adoption upon giving birth, which meant no real responsibilities for the two of you, but the fear and guilt still weighed in the air.

Your apartment couldn’t arrive fast enough. Soobin slowly pulls into the lot, putting his car in park in an empty space. You quickly unbuckle your seatbelt and jump out of the passenger side before Soobin can even reach for his buckle. 

“Wait-” He’s barely able to catch the sleeve in time, forcing you to stop and look back at him. 

You two don’t say anything, as if you were scared that speaking would make everything worse. The words pile up in his mouth, Soobin can only stare at you. His hand is shaking as his fingers tightly grip the thick cotton material of your hoodie. 

You look panicked. His stomach drops.

“I-I’ll call you, yeah?” He stumbles over his words as he finally lets go of you. His hand falls to your seat. You just nod and your arm resumes your side, you step out of the car.

He watches from the comfort of his car as you hurry inside. You don’t turn around to wave goodbye.

Not that you ever did before.

It takes longer than expected for Soobin to actually call you back, but three weeks later you’re running out of Soobin’s apartment in angry tears.

And he’s stuck standing at the bathroom door holding a bottle of water in shock.

All he’d done was tap you on the shoulder to hand you the water, and you slapped him away before dashing out the front door.

He breaks out of his daze and finally shuffles to the door, its gaping wide open.

Soobin’s apartment building was massive, a total of 15 floors with more than 30 rooms each. You could be anywhere, but he ventures down to the garage anyways.

There he finds you crying to yourself as you sit in your car, all in your lonesome.

He watches from a distance for a while as he contemplates whether or not to go and comfort you. But ultimately he feels guilty, because you wouldn’t be crying if it weren’t for him.

Had you never met Soobin, you might be living an entirely different life right now.

You wouldn’t be experiencing constant nausea and pain. You wouldn’t have moved out of your apartment into his. 

You wouldn’t be pregnant.

Soobin swallows thickly and sluggishly makes his way back to the elevator. He rides it all the way back to his floor and he quietly reenters his apartment.

The water bottle sits alone on the kitchen counter unopened. He ignores it and sits on his sofa with his head in his hands. The only thing on Soobin’s mind is you.

What were you thinking right now? How could he comfort you, make you feel better? You’ve suffered so much, the least he could do is make the situation a little more bearable. 

As Soobin tries to think of an answer, he soon realizes he doesn’t have one because of one simple reason: He doesn’t actually know you.

He has no idea what you like and dislike, how you think, how you like to be comforted. You’re the idol of his affection, the one person who could make him fall to his knees with a single plea, yet you’re also unfamiliar and unwilling. An extreme case of one-sided love.

He doesn’t know how long he’s been sitting here, but eventually there’s a knock at the front door. Soobin is slow to get up and answer it.

You stare up at him with red eyes and pouty lips. Even when you cried you were pretty, it was baffling.

He steps to the side and you come in, your entire demeanor has shifted to someone who is full of shame. It’s heart wrenching to watch.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.” You cough out, refusing to make eye contact. You’re focused on the floor, shoulders slumped as your hair hides your face from him. Soobin notices the sleeves of your shirt are still stained with your tears.

Instead of accepting your apology with words, Soobin leans down and tilts your head up to look up at him. There’s something about your flushed face and teary eyes that makes him feel territorial.

He enraptures you into a soft kiss, one that quickly evolves into a kiss of sloppy hunger. He pulls you down the hall and into his bedroom, hands slipping underneath your shirt to feel the heat of your skin. 

Because Soobin does know one thing about you, and that’s how to make you feel good.

Soobin wakes up to your hair in his face. Your back is pressed against his chest as he has his arms thrown over your figure. His nose is nestled into the crook of your neck, he can hear your gentle snores as he struggles to open his eyes. 

He must have not closed his curtains all the way last night, because the morning sun peaks through and shines right into his eye.

WIth a groan, Soobin rolls over and checks the time on his phone. It's 7:37 am. He has a class at 8:10. It takes him 12 minutes to drive to school, 9 on a good day with no traffic. He should probably get out of bed and get dressed so he could leave right about now, but the warm heat of your body underneath his blankets is much too alluring right now. 

So instead of getting ready, Soobin decides he can skip a lecture for today and snuggles back into bed with you. He could probably beg Wooyoung later for his notes.

Just as he’s about to fall back asleep you begin to rustle around, conveniently rubbing against him. Your movements actually cause Soobin to hold his breath. His eyes shoot open and he lies beside you frozen. 

You calm down and find a comfortable position, but that does nothing for Soobin’s half hard dick poking at your behind.

A part of him wants to wake you up, just so he could indulge in himself, the other knows you’ve also woken up three times in the middle of last night to either pee or puke. 

So Soobin decides the best thing to do is to torture himself and stay as still as humanly possible so that you wouldn’t notice, and hopely by the time you wake up for work his morning wood is gone.

But again, things never go as planned.

Soobin is busy trying to distract himself by imagining all of the least attractive things he can think of when he suddenly lets out a strangled moan.

You’re rubbing him. With your hand. You were awake.

“W-Wait,” He hiccups, turning you around so you can face him. You still look sleepy, but you smirk at him nonetheless.

“Should I call out today? Hmm?” You hum, your hand is now fully in his boxers, your thumb running over the head of his cock.

“Fuck yes please,” Soobin exhales as he closes his eyes. He feels you shift, then you tug at the waistband of his boxers, pulling them off.

You sit up and stretch your arms before climbing on top of him, sitting atop his hardening cock. Soobin sucks in a breath, God he loves being engulfed in you.

You rock your hips slowly, finding a comfortable rhythm for this lazy morning. You both don’t bother to fully undress, just enjoying the moment together.

He’s so consumed by his own sensual pleasure, Soobin doesn’t realize you had reached over and grabbed your phone from your nightstand until you start to speak.

“Hi, can I speak to the manager?” You ask, slightly out of breath. You’re still on top of him, hips bobbing up and down as you talk to your management on the phone. 

“Yeah, I can’t come in today, feeling sick again.” You moan, one of your hands falling onto Soobin’s chest. His heart is beating rapidly, his lust growing by the second.

Your movements slow, making him frustrated. Your attention should be on him. “-have enough hours to co-over!” You gasp as Soobin lifts you slightly, holding you by the hips so he can take control, thrusting into you hungrily. 

“I-I’m fine! Just got a really bad cramp.” You lie, glaring at Soobin. He only scoffs, he knows you like it, you wouldn’t be clenching around him like a vice if you didn’t.

You quickly hang up the phone, tossing it to the side. “You sound so hot when you lie, did you know that?” Soobin teases as he lets you resume control.

“Shut up and fuck me already,” You groan. He smirks, proceeding to flip you over so you lay on your back.

You two share a soft and sweet kiss, tongues meshing together as he slowly fucks himself deeper into your cunt. 

“Always so needy,” He jokes, but you don’t hear him, basking in the pleasure.

The blank page on his screen is blinding. His cursor blinks at him, waiting for him to begin typing. But the words never come, because how can Soobin even write an essay when all he can’t think about is this morning.

Just hours ago you and Soobin were sitting in the doctor’s office, getting your first ultrasound. The little pea-sized dot in your tummy was his baby.

“Actually,” Your doctor clears her throat. “You’re just far along enough that we can try and see if we can detect the baby’s heartbeat.” 

Soobin’s eyes go wide as she moves the transducer around your gelled belly. He’s laser focused on the screen trying to search for the little blob the doctor referred to as your baby.

“Here we are,” Your doctor hums as she slows to a stop. Soobin holds his breath, he doesn’t realise he’s leaning closer to the screen. The entire room is in complete silence, the anticipation has his stomach twisting. 

Then, from the scratchy low quality speaker of the computer screen, out bellows a single thump. And then another. And another. It’s fast yet regular, it feels familiar to Soobin.

“Oh my god,” He whispers, it’s barely audible, but the doctor hears and it makes her chuckle. “Isn’t it unreal?” She asks him, and Soobin can only nod, eyes still stuck on the screen.

He knew you were pregnant, but to hear the baby’s actual heart, it was so- Soobin whips his head around to you.

He doesn’t know what to expect with your reaction, but he never really expected to see you with your eyes closed shut and wearing a frown of discomfort.

And now he’s sitting at his tiny dining room table, trying to focus as he has to write about how minimum wage affects the economic state of the nation and how the problem of poverty can be solved. But how can he when he can’t get the look of pain on your face out of his head?

He’s dazed when you come waltzing in. You changed out of your old outfit into something more comfortable: yoga pants and his sweatshirt.  

“I’m going to work, want me to pick up dinner?” You ask, opening the fridge to grab a cup of juice. But Soobin doesn’t answer, his eyes are glazed over. “Soobin?” You ask, still digging through the fridge.

“Soobin, hey!” You snap your fingers in front of his face and he magically comes back to reality.

“Huh? Sorry.” He shakes his head.

“Are you okay?” You ask, looking at him concerned. “Yeah, just tired.” He lies, rubbing the back of his neck. You step back and nod slowly.

“Okay, well did you want me to pick up dinner tonight?” You ask again, and this time he responds.

“Sure, whatever you feel like.” He complies, looking back at his blank screen. You watch him, confused but also curious. He starts to type slowly, but ends up deleting it all. His head ends up in his hands as he struggles to even form a sentence. 

“I’m gonna get going, okay? See you later.” You say. Soobin grunts you goodbye, just as you lean over and ruffle his hair. His head shoots up, eyes wide as you giggle to yourself and leave with a mischievous smile.

You shut the front door as you leave and Soobin is left alone, his cursor still blinking against the blank sheet of paper. At this rate he’s never gonna pass his class.

With a sigh he slumps in his seat. He can’t get the image of the ultrasound out of his head.

It’s then that he remembers: the doctor gave you photos of the ultrasound. Last he saw the photos, you were holding them in your hand as he drove you two home. Where did you put it?!

Soobin soon finds himself digging around the bedroom, hoping you hadn’t thrown the photos away or taken them with you. But luckily for him, you’d tucked the strip of photos into the back of your nightstand drawer. 

It was slightly bent, but he smoothed it over, his thumb grazing over the familiar little fuzzy white dot in the sea of black.

He makes his way back to the kitchen, holding the photos gently as he sits back down at the table. His document is still blank, but Soobin doesn’t care and he opens a new tab. He begins to type immediately:

What to expect when pregnant?

“So! What was it that you wanted to talk about?”

Soobin finds it hard to breathe at the moment as he squirms in his chair. Sitting across from him, his boss Jung Hoseok smiles unknowingly.

“You know, I’m actually surprised you asked to speak to me personally. You’re a diligent worker Soobin, I’m loving your results.” Hoseok grins as he overlooks a file on his desk. “Keep up the good work and I’m willing to promote you from assistant manager to manager. Maybe even the branch manager!” He chuckles as he tosses the file to the side.

Soobin clears his throat, sitting up straight. “Actually sir, that relates to what-” “Oh come on Soobin! You don’t have to call me that here, we’ve known each other long enough. Call me by my first name.” Hoseok interrupts.

Soobin is sweating. Hoseok’s good mood was making him nervous. “Well, uh, Hoseok. Sir.” His mouth feels numb as he repeats his name, but the other man gets a good laugh out of it. 

“I wanted to talk to you about my position actually.” Immediately his boss’ smile falls. The air grows thick and it’s like there’s a loud buzzing noise filling the room. 

“What exactly are you telling me Soobin?” Hoseok’s eyes are dark, they scare him. Soobin has to look away, focusing his attention on the wall behind him as he forces the words out of his lips.

“I-I-I’m ex-expecting.” His voice is small, it’s like he’s whimpering. Immediately Soobin’s eyes meet the ground.

For a couple of seconds, no one moves. His head remains slumped, his hands shaking as they rest on his knees. Then his boss adjusts his seat and sighs. 

“... Expecting what? Am I missing something here?”

Soobin whips his head up in surprise, he actually raises a brow at Hoseok, looking at him like he’s lost his mind. His boss is equally confused.

“I’m expecting… a baby, Hoseok.” He speaks slowly this time, but by the time he finishes his sentence, Hoseok’s signature smile returns. 

“Really?! Oh my, congratulations! And here I thought you were resigning! I would’ve really thrown a fit if you tried leaving haha!” He laughs hysterically, and Soobin finally loosens up.

“Uh, thank you. I just wanted to see if I could request more hours or ask for a promotion of some sort.” Soobin tries to shrug his worries off. “Oh yeah, sure sure. I’ll talk to Seokjin and Yoongi, I’m sure we can figure something out.” Hoseok waves him off.

“Now tell me, when is your baby due? Boy or girl? Do we have any names picked out yet?” Hoseok leaned over his desk as if he wanted to gossip. 

If he were being honest, he believed this meeting to go a lot rougher. Hoseok was notorious for being a dedicated and hard worker who pursued professional perfection like a rocket. Soobin half expected to get demoted, or worse, fired.

But there was a spark of excitement in his boss’ eyes that was shocking. It seemed like he had a soft spot for children, lucky for Soobin.

“In August, it’s still too early so we don’t know the gender yet. I’m not sure about any names.” Soobin answers. 

“But thank you, really. My partner's been really sick recently. She hasn’t been able to go to school or work much. I don’t want her to worry about our finances right now on top of the baby.” He admits.

Just last week you came home crying angry tears. You confessed your manager decided to reprimand you for all of your call outs by giving your shifts away to other coworkers. “We’ll be okay,” He patted your back as you cried into his shoulder that night. Soobin’s sad attempts to comfort you did nothing to soothe your wails. Hearing your frustrations led him to wanting to do better for you.

Hoseok’s smile softens. “Oh I completely understand. My sister was always tired or in pain when she was pregnant. I tried to be helpful when I visited her. I can’t imagine what your girlfriend is going through.”

Girlfriend. That word makes his cheeks hot.

“Y-Yeah, I really want to relieve her stress in any way I can.” Soobin coughs.

Hoseok suddenly claps his hands. “Well that settles it! I’ll talk to the guys, we’ll get back to you as soon as possible about this.” He smiles as he stands, signaling for Soobin to be on his way as well.

“Thank you sir, I’m really, really grateful.” Soobin tries his best to convey his thanks. “Don’t mention it! Just invite me to the baby shower,” Hoseok winks as he leads Soobin out of his office.

Soobin wasn’t even sure if you wanted a baby shower, given your circumstance, but he nods anyway. “Yes, of course.” He says before turning around to head back to his desk.

“Oh! Soobin!” Hoseok calls out, and he backtracks. “Yes?”

Hoseok pats him on the shoulder. “Don’t forget to talk to HR and apply for paternity leave, you won’t want to miss out on special quality time with your little one.”

You’re so quiet, Soobin has to gently kick your leg to get you to talk.

“S-Sorry! What was the question?” You stutter, laughing at yourself in embarrassment as you try to smile your pain away. 

“What are you going to school for my dear?” Soobin’s mom asks you from across the table. She has a sweet smile on her face as she holds her mug of tea.

As you nervously explain your career path to his parents, Soobin watches intently, sitting next to you. 

Today was the day he introduced you to his parents. And tell them about your pregnancy.

If anything, Soobin should be the one who is nervous. His stomach feels like it might collapse on itself, and he can’t stand up properly without gripping onto something for stability.

The entire 30 minute drive was so nerve wracking, that Soobin actually had to pull over and calm himself down for 10 minutes. 

He shifts in his seat and makes eye contact with you. You give him a sheepish smile which oddly comforts him. He guessed he liked knowing you were also anxious. 

“So remind me again how long you guys have been dating? His last girlfriend lasted 5 months,” His dad jokes, laughing loudly. 

Soobin cuts in before his parents can say anything else embarrassing. “Since August, so about two months? Almost three.” He lies. You laugh awkwardly as you nod in agreement.

You and Soobin decided it’d be best to let his parents assume you two were dating. That way they’d feel less awkward about the pregnancy, but also so that they wouldn’t react like your parents, whom you’d visited just two weeks.

You two haven’t exactly figured out what to tell his parents after birth, but he assumed you two would decide eventually.

“Oh that’s so nice! I’m so glad Soobin and you are getting along so well.” His mom smiles and stands up. She pinched Soobin’s cheek, making him whine, before walking to the kitchen.

“Now, who’s hungry? I’ve made some mandu-guk, kimchi, and japchae. I also grilled some meat and made spicy pork!” 

She sets the plates of food out, everything looks appetizing. But your face contorts at the strong scents, and you quickly excuse yourself to the bathroom.

“Sorry, uh, she really has to pee I guess.” Soobin laughs. His parents stare at him with an unsure expression. “Soobin, you never really bring your girlfriends to visit us. Are you sure this girl is the one? She seems awkward and stiff.” His dad admits.

“I know, just trust me.” He winces. “I mean she barely speaks to us! I don’t know if I can trust my baby with someone who can’t even hold a conversation with your father and I.” His mom sighs.

“She’s just nervous, she’s usually not like this.” Soobin defends you. Hearing his own parents nitpick at you begins to make his blood boil, slowly forgetting his nerves.

“And now she won’t eat your mother’s cooking? Now that’s just plain rude!” His dad exclaims.

Soobin slams a hand on the table, scaring his parents and even himself. 

“Sorry sorry, I’m sorry. We wanted to tell you this later, when she’s ready, but I guess we can’t keep hiding it.” Soobin rubs his hands over his face.

“What is it? Soobin?” His mom sounds worried. Fuck. He wishes you were here to help him, but you were probably trying to hide the vomit from your nausea in the bathroom down the hall.

“Don’t tell me you’re in trouble with the law and you’re covering for her.”

“What? No.” Soobin sighs. “Mom, dad. Y/n is pregnant. We’re having a baby.”

The room becomes so silent you can hear the ticking of the clock that hangs in the hallway. And with every tick, Soobin’s heart pounded with fear.

Suddenly he hears a sniffle, and he immediately looks up to find his mom crying. “Mom, please don’t-“

“I’m so happy!” Her voice breaks as her husband leans over to hug her. He gives Soobin the warmest smile. “You’re all grown up, aren’t you?”

Soobin feels his own tears well up in his eyes. He blinks them away, nodding with assurance. “Yeah. I am.”

“You told them?” You step out from the hall looking ashamed and scared. “Mr. and Mrs. Choi, I’m so sorry, I never meant to burden Soobin. I get it if you hate me but please don’t hate him-“

“Y/n, it’s okay.” Soobin smiles at you, and pats your seat for you to sit. 

You look confused, almost in denial. “…It’s okay?” You squeak, your eyes looking at him for approval.

“It’s more than okay.” His dad interjects, wiping a tear. “We’re so blessed! Oh my baby is having a baby!” His mother weeps.

You stand still unable to move your eyes from his joyfully woe parents. Soobin has to stand up and guide you back to your seat. 

“What’d I tell you? It’s okay.” He whispers into your ear, and you finally relax.

He’s staring. A lot. It’s too obvious for anyone to not notice. 

But Soobin can’t find it in him to tear his eyes away from the little stuffed bunny plush stuck in the claw machine. It sat pretty on a little shelf, its light gray fur looked so soft, paired with the plush pink nose, the stuffed animal was unarguably adorable. 

Personally, Soobin didn't really care for any plushies. But he knew you did. When you moved in with him, you created a designated spot on the bed for your favorite little bear. 

And this stuffed bunny was the perfect companion in Soobin’s eyes. So after staring through the glass for a solid five minutes, he finally fishes out some cash out of his wallet and inserts it into the machine. 

It dances alive, corny music playing as lights blinked to the beat. The automated voice instructs him that he has 2 tries to win a prize and cheers him on.

Soobin moves the joy stick around, trying to get the right angles before he hits the button. The claw goes down, and narrowly misses the bunny. He frowns and huffs. This second time he moves the claw a bit to the right. He’s off by a couple centimeters again.

As the claw machine turns off, Soobin quickly pulls out another bill, stuffing it into the machine. It turns on again, repeating the same process. He was determined to win this bunny, even if it meant he’d go broke.

By his 12th try, Soobin is starting to get increasingly frustrated. He’s contemplating sticking his arm through the hole and just snatching the plushy himself. 

“Soobin! Dude, we were supposed to meet at the lobby, what the hell?!” Yeonjun shouts as he and the others approach him.

We’re gonna miss our reservation if we don’t leave right now.” Taehyun reminds them. “Okay, just give me a second,” Soobin waves them off as he tries to use his height to see the best angle. 

“Okay your second is up, let’s go.” Beomgyu says sarcastically, only to earn a cold glare from Soobin. “Shut up, I’m trying to concentrate.”

He presses the button once more, only to fail another time. He lets out a long and tired grunt, closing his eyes. The bright neon colors of the claw machine were starting to burn his retinas. 

“What’re you trying to get? Let me try,” Kai suddenly speaks up, wiggling his way to the front. Soobin concedes, allowing Kai to pay for his own turn. “The bunny.” He mumbles. Kai only nods and in three swift moves him aligns the claw perfectly, catching the stuffed animal in one try.

“Damn, that was smooth as hell,” Beomgyu laughs. Kai pretends to tip a hat before handing the prized bunny plush to Soobin. He swipes it, looking more glum than he did before.

“What? I thought you wanted it?” Kai asks as they all begin to make their way to the restaurant they reserved. 

“I did. Thanks I guess.” He mutters. Just like he suspected, the plushy was incredibly soft. He hopes you like it.

“I didn’t know you liked plushies too Soobin, when’d you start collecting?” Kai asks enthusiastically. Soobin looks away embarrassed, stuffing a hand into his pocket. “It’s not for me, it’s for Y/n,”

“Bro you are such a simp.” Beomgyu suddenly guffaws. Soobin doesn’t hesitate to punch him in the arm.

“Fuck off,” He growls. “I’m just trying to be nice.” 

“You do know you guys aren’t dating, right?” Taehyun asks, and now Soobin is even more ashamed. “I know we’re not.” 

An awkward silence fills the group. Soobin knows they’re all staring, exchanging looks as he walks ahead of them.

So instead of talking about his feelings, he looks at the stuffed bunny, petting its soft fur. He wonders what your reaction will be. 

Somehow he pulls himself out of his car and into the elevator, going up to the 5th floor. It was late, Dokyung was probably already asleep. His sister and his brother in law might be too. Maybe he should just go back home.

But the thought of facing you again is more painful as time passes.

You and Soobin have been together for 10 months, almost an entire year together, yet you can’t seem to admit you’re in love with him. He’s in denial, he knows you love him.

But what if you really didn’t?

There were multiple times he could point out where you treated him more like a friend or a brother rather than a partner.

You used him constantly, it was painful.

He steps out of the elevator and makes a beeline to his sister’s door. He raises a hand to knock but hesitates.

Was this right? Was it worth it? Was he making a mistake? Soobin cut his sister off after she exposed his ruse, but in the end she had good intentions. He and you were planning on fooling his parents, especially his mother. 

His sister might have been harsh and stern to you, but he also knows that she probably had predicted this exact moment would happen. Her words that freezing night in February were colder than the ice, maybe he should have listened.

Soobin’s hand falls to his side, he’s lost all his confidence. 

How could he face his sister? After all the mistakes he’s made since then, she’d only make him feel worse by bragging about how she was right. It would grind his already shattered heart.

He should just go home and talk to you-

The door to the apartment swings open suddenly, and Soobin comes face to face with his sister. She looks frazzled, her hair is thrown into a messy ponytail, she’s still in her pajamas, but she has a jacket on top. She wears slippers, her purse lays over her shoulder.

But the second she realizes it’s Soobin standing in front of her, she lets out a giant sigh. “Oh my God.” Her voice is shaky, and she immediately pulls him into a tight hug. She then pulls away to grab him by the cheeks, checking him for any signs for injuries or mess before hugging him again.

“I’m so glad you’re okay,” She breaks down, crying into his shoulder. Soobin hugs her back, feeling relief for the first time tonight. But he suddenly pulls away, grabbing his older sister by the shoulders.

“What do you mean you’re glad I’m okay?”

Soobin feels a bit relieved learning you were having a boy. He’s only ever babysat Dokyung a handful of times, and the idea of raising a little girl was frightening to him.

But then he’s reminded that you two were not in fact raising a baby, just growing one.

He didn’t have to worry or think about these things, because they would never come to fruition. 

Yet he still fantasizes. 

He goes to bed and dreams of taking his son to the park, going shopping together, and playing around the house.

He sees you in every dream too. Sometimes you’re smiling serenely from afar. Others you’re right there next to him, being a mother looks good on you he likes to think. 

The only disturbing part of his dreams were the fact that he could never actually see the face of his son. Whether it be blurred or he’d be turning away, it’s as if he can never see his face clearly. It bothered him, he was so curious, what would a baby between you and him look like?

As he turns to your napping figure on the couch. You lay on your side, a throw blanket over your legs as you snore gently. You’re so tired you don’t even realize that the Tv is still on, playing the next episode of the show you were watching. 

Soobin quietly pads over to the couch, leaning down to pick up the remote that had fallen to the ground as he turns off the TV. 

He kneels beside you, watching as your chest slowly rises and falls in a rhythmic pattern as you sleep. If he could choose, Soobin would hope that your baby boy would look like you more than him. 

Sure, he understood he was above average when it came to looks, and he’s sure you’d probably want your son to have his height, but Soobin would feel more satisfied knowing he could look at his own son and see you in him. 

You and your soft eyes and pretty smile. Your soothing voice, your healthy hair. Your smooth skin, your wonderful laughter, all of the above he wishes for. 

You suddenly sigh and turn over and Soobin leaps back up to pretend he was never there. You don’t wake though, and he calms down. 

You look so comfortable, the thought of joining you was enticing. Falling into his urges, Soobin lifts the blanket and scoots you over to make room for him. Even though half of his body is hanging off the couch, he hugs you close and closes his eyes.

Just as he’s about to fall asleep, you wiggle yourself around to face him. Soobin opens an eye to find you yawning as you blink yourself awake. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” He mumbles. You only grunt and nod, snuggling into him. You go back to sleep, and as Soobin holds you in his arms, he can only imagine what it’d be like to nap with not only you, but your son.

To hear the word “Dad” come out of his son’s own lips seems like a dream far away.

“Still haven’t told me what all this is for,” Soobin groans as he fishes his dick out of his pants, unzipping his jeans and letting them fall down to the floor.

You ignore him, pulling away from his kiss to sit on the bed, legs wide open and waiting for him. You’re uncharacteristically sweet today, wearing a soft smile and adoration filling your eyes.

“You’re being really nice today,” He smirks, throwing off his shirt before laying you down on the mattress. “Is it because it happens to be a certain someone’s birthday?” He plays dumb.

“I know another way we can celebrate you if you insist,” You tease, pushing him away, but he playfully yanks you back towards him. “I’d rather not,” He murmurs against your lips, capturing you into a kiss. 

Today was Soobin’s birthday, December 5th, and so far he’d argue this was the best birthday he’s had yet. 

This morning you snuck out and bought his favorite pastries from the local bakery down the street for breakfast. When he went to class after you sent him off with a sweet smile and a wave. 

After acing his last final exam, he went straight to work, where his coworkers gifted him a mini cake and a signed card, and even sang him a cheesy birthday song. As soon as he was off the clock his friends whisked him away to go get dinner and drinks.

But all day you’ve been sending him the most risque texts: of you begging for his cock, a photo of your bare ass, an audio of you moaning his name as you touch yourself, and lastly an old video of yours where he had recorded you in the mirror as you rode him in his desk chair. 

Now it’s late at night, he’s slightly drunk, and you’re wearing the prettiest lacy lingerie set he’s ever laid eyes on, with a wet pussy on full display. 

“Happy birthday Soobin,” You whisper as if it’s a secret. He thanks you by stuffing you full of his cock.

Outside the snow falls rather hard than delicately, yet it’s still a beautiful scene to watch from the comfort of his bedroom window.

Soobin yawns. It’s late and practically everyone in the house has retired for the night except for you and him.

Both you and Soobin were spending Christmas with his family this year. He’s just finished laying out the little cot on the ground beside his bed for him to sleep tonight, making it as comfortable as he can. His mother had originally been so worried when she found out you two were going to spend the night.

But Soobin assured her he’d be fine sleeping on the floor for one night, it would have to be done because his twin bed would not fit the both of you, nor would the snow let up enough for him to drive you guys back to the apartment.

Feeling more tired by the second, he sits on his old mattress just as you walk into the room.

There’s something that makes Soobin’s stomach flip as he watches you make yourself comfortable in his childhood room.  

You’re fresh from the shower, drying your hair with your towel as you wear an old large pair of sweats and a long sleeve. Both of them were his. 

“You might want to hurry if you want hot water,” You warn him, standing in front of his mirror. “The water was getting a little cold as I finished.”

Soobin hates cold showers with a passion, but he doesn’t mind suffering from them if it means he gets to see you like this.

So instead of hurrying to the bathroom, he pats the empty space beside him on his old bed for you to sit. You don’t hesitate to plop down next to him, letting him take the towel from your hands as Soobin begins to gently dry your hair for you. 

With your back to him, he thinks your eyes are closed, enjoying the quiet serene moment. That is until you speak up.

“So,” You hum. “When were you going to tell me you have a furry fetish?”

Soobin drops the towel. “What?!”

You raise your hand and point across the room. On his wall was a hung poster of his favorite girl group Kara, the members all posing as each one of them is wearing a variant of animal ears and fuzzy matching gloves.

Soobin physically spins you around to face him, you give him a teasing grin. “I don’t- It’s a poster! I got it for free when I was a kid, leave me alone!” He complains as you begin to laugh. 

As he pouts, you stand to hang your wet towel on his old desk chair. “I’m just joking with you, I know,” You chuckle and stand between sulky Soobin’s legs to pull him into a hug. He gratefully does so, resting his head atop your tummy. You run a hand through his hair, the other one rubs small circles into his back.

Soobin closes his eyes and sighs. He loved being close with you like this, a fantasy he wishes he could live in forever.

“Your nephew’s really cute,” You say, but it’s so quiet it’s practically a whisper.

Soobin hums in agreement, eyes still closed as he listens intently to the sounds of your womb and growing son. “He’s funny too, kept poking my belly earlier.” You giggle. He feels the baby kick as you laugh. 

There’s a new unique sense of comfort and familiarity as you cradle him. 

Soobin cracks his eyes open, taking in the scene: the room he grew up in, lit by the dull yellowing light of his lamp. The quiet hum of the A/C unit blowing warm air throughout the house. Your soft skin and the gentle smell of your santal body wash. It all seems too good to be true.

Your right hand moves from his hand down to cup his chin. You gently guide him to face you, peering up at you like a curious puppy. And to him you’re an angel heaven sent.

“Come on, go shower so we can go to bed.” You say delicately, sweeping his bangs out of his eyes.

Soobin frowns, but stands up anyways. He often forgets how much taller he is compared to you. He doesn’t exactly keep a record of it. But he towers over you, your head tilted up to look at him curiously.

His hand comes up to caress your cheek and he leans down to kiss you.

It’s unlike any other kiss you two have shared, where sex is usually involved and made of raw lust. This kiss was innocent, full of endearment and vulnerability. A simple kiss to convey his true feelings.

You kiss him back with the same vehemence and Soobin feels hopeful.

In January you seem happier, even though you spend your days going to work and doing nothing all day. You barely passed this last semester, all thanks to Soobin’s help, but with your pregnancy progressing you decided to take a break and skip out of qthis upcoming term. 

Soobin notices your new relaxed state quite quickly.

“Uh, whatcha doing there?” He tries to hold his laughter in as he walks up behind the couch. 

You don’t move from your spot, eyes focused on the TV. You spoon yourself another bite of your ice cream, not even paying attention to him. “Eating ice cream,” You say monotonously. 

He watches you with amusement, leaning over to observe you closer.

You’re slouched down, a fluffy blanket laid tucked on top of you, and your bowl of Ben & Jerry’s sits not in your lap, but rests right on top of your bulging belly. Your hands rest on your sides when you’re not feeding yourself.

The image of you using your own stomach as your own personal table was incredibly entertaining to Soobin, so much so that he pulls out his phone and snaps a photo.

You hear the click of his camera and actually turn around, eyebrows furrowed in confusion and concern. Soobin giggles to himself as he looks at the photo, his hand covering his childlike grin. 

“What? Did you take a picture of me? Why?” You ask, holding the bowl in your hand now as you try to lean over to get a look. 

Soobin’s laughter slowly dies down, and he ruffles your hair before showing you the photo. You scoff, pouting even as you realize why he’s been giggling at you. “It’s not funny,” You pretend to be upset, but he can see through you. 

He hops over the couch to sit next to you, snuggling into your side. “Oh but it is,” He teases. You roll your eyes and sigh, returning your bowl back to its spot on your tummy.

“Want a bite?” You ask, offering him a spoon. He opens his mouth and allows you to feed him. “This is good, holy shit.” He’s astonished, having never actually had a bite of your favorite ice cream. 

“I told you!” You laugh. “Want some more?” You spoon him another bite, which he graciously eats. 

“As long as you feed me.” He continues to joke. You pretend to scorn him, wagging a finger in his face as if to lecture him. 

“You’re playing dirty.” You hum. His grin widens. “I thought you liked me better when I played dirty.” He retaliates, smirking at you.

Instead of fighting back like he thought you would, you sigh and sit up, pushing him off you. 

“Come on Soobin, don’t act like you’re my boyfriend, we aren’t dating.” You say in a joking tone as you walk to the kitchen. 

He stays stunned on the couch, smile fallen and body limp.

Soobin watches with pure adoration as you are sat on the ground, legs splayed out as his nephew shows you every single one of his toy dinosaurs he has in his room.

Dokyung’s current obsession was dinosaurs, and the young boy was happily yapping to you about the many figures he’d brought from his toy box. You’re sitting beside him, listening to every little thing he has to say, nodding along and even asking questions.

You and Soobin have come to visit his sister and her family, a request from Dokyung after he enjoyed your company at Christmas. You didn’t mind seeing his nephew, as you found him amusing. In fact you liked him a lot.

The two of you are busy reenacting a dino fight when Soobin’s sister taps his shoulder.

“Hey can we talk?” She asks, already leading him to her bedroom. “Uh, what’s up?” He asks nervously, hanging by the door as his sister settles atop her mattress. 

“Nothing, just wondering why you never told me you were expecting?” She hides her irritation behind a stiff smile. 

Soobin knew this would happen. He’d been anticipating it all day. All week actually. He’s been mentally preparing for this moment that he’s already got his responses memorized.

“It was a surprise, really.” He recites. “Neither of us were really expecting for this to happen.” He shrugs.

“But I want to be there for her, She’s already going through a lot with the changes of her body, it’s the least I could do.” His sister nods as she listens. 

“How chivalrous of you.” She chuckles. “But raising a kid is hard, there’s so many things you have to consider before deciding to have a baby.”

“I’m worried Soobin, you’re both so young and still in school. Mom and dad are excited but they aren’t gonna always be able to help. They’re getting old too, you know.”

Soobin feels guilty as his sister speaks. If only she knew what you planned to do after birth, none of these were a concern of yours for that exact reason.

“You’re going to have to make a lot of sacrifices, I know my husband and I did with Dokyung, but we’re grown adults with stable jobs. You and Y/n should have thought about this more.”

Soobin’s heart grows heavier with each word. The concern in his sister’s voice is killing him inside. This woman practically helped raise him. Him and his siblings have a large age gap, his sister being 10 years older than him. She would take Soobin with her on errands, babysit him every summer break, feed him meals when his parents were working late.

Does he have the heart to hide the truth from her?

“Soobin, I’m not trying to make you feel bad, I promise. I just want you to make the right decision. Okay?” She looks at him with earnest eyes and he just nods. 

His sister stands, walks over to him and gives him a hug. “You know you can always come to me for help, right? I’m here for you.”

She pulls away and gives him a soft smile. Soobin can’t dare to look at her and lie. So he swallows thickly, lips thin.

“Sis, there’s something I need to tell you.”

The drive to the hospital is unbearingly slow despite the fact that Soobin was driving 20 kms past the speed limit. 

“Slow down,” His sister hisses, she’s gripping the door handle stiffly. But Soobin ignores her and speeds up.

In fact, he doesn’t even hear his sister and her warnings of him being pulled over or causing a crash. Instead all he can hear is your name. Over and over and over again, he can hear your name, see your face, feel your touch. It’s fleeting and that scares him. 

Upon entering his sister’s apartment, Soobin was quickly informed that you had suddenly gone into labor and could not contact him. You called his mother and let her know that Soobin was missing and that you were going to the hospital. His mother contacted his sister who was just about to go out and search for Soobin, just to find him standing at her doorway.

And now Soobin is zooming to the hospital, his body is moving on his own without any control.

Everything was his fault. He shouldn’t have left, he shouldn’t have yelled at you, he shouldn’t have made you cry. Soobin felt guilty beyond belief. His tears begin to flow, and suddenly he’s blind, he can’t see.

“SOOBIN STOP! BRAKE! BRAKE!!” His sister is slapping his arm as she screams, and he instinctively hits the brakes, stopping centimeters from the car in front of him. The car lurches to a stop. Soobin’s knuckles are white as they are wrapped around the wheel, but they’re shaking.

“Get out.” His sister’s voice is coarse yet quiet. He doesn’t move, still breathing heavy as he tries to calm his heart. “Soobin, get out.” She’s stern this time, unbuckling herself and his own seatbelt. She steps out and runs around the car and opens his door, practically dragging him out of the front seat.

“Go sit in the passenger,” She instructs, and he nervously follows her directions. His sister now sits in the driver’s seat and continues the drive.

Soobin sits lifelessly in the other seat, tears silently flowing down his face as he tries to fight his own emotions before it’s too late.

Soobin looks around the empty apartment. Since you’ve moved in, it feels more like a home now. Before you lived with him, Soobin’s apartment was plain, he only had the necessities, with barely any decor. 

But the second you stepped inside you changed everything, with your houseplants, copious amounts of throw blankets and pillows on his couch, and your need for a candle to be found in every room.

He likes how your clothes filled the empty gap in his closet. He likes how your skincare and makeup litter the bathroom counter next to his toothbrush. He likes how you hung up frames and posters on his bare walls.

He likes you. And you like him back too. At least he thought so.

Yesterday was Valentine’s Day.

Soobin bought you flowers, chocolates, reserved your favorite restaurant for dinner, and gifted you the purse you’ve been eyeing online for the past month. He never asked for anything in return, because just being with you was a gift enough for him. He couldn’t care less about gifts, he just loved spending time with you.

But when you saw all of this, all that he did for you, you looked at him confused.

“Thank you, these are beautiful,” You smile as you hold the flowers and glance at the purse. 

“But Soobin,” You have to look away as you put the flowers in a vase. “Isn’t Valentine’s Day for couples? We aren’t dating.”

Those words from last night lead him to his question now: What was he to you?

Your actions and words never matched up, and Soobin was constantly filled with confusion.

One day he acts as your boyfriend, your lover, your husband if you will. And the others he was a stranger. You treated him like he was expendable.

You two weren’t a couple, this was something you constantly insisted on, but neither of you can’t seem to pull away from each other no matter how hard you try. This awkward stage of will-you-won’t-you was frustrating to him.

The only thing was that Soobin was a bit of a coward. He’s always struggled to express his true feelings, and with you it’s even harder when he has what feels like his entire life on the line.

Sometimes when he’s alone, his brain reminds him of the consequences of his actions- more like the consequences of his inaction. With his inability to convey to you his own desires, you walk all over him like a rug. 

But Soobin knows deep down you do care for him.

He can tell with the way you look at him, how your eyes always soften when he’s in view. You speak to him with such a sweet tone, even when you’re unhappy. 

He notices the little things you do, like how you called his mom a week before his birthday to learn how to cook his favorite meal. Or whenever he’d come home late from work you’d stay up to help him get ready for bed. 

That time he went out with the guys for Yeonjun’s birthday, and he got so drunk that you had to pick him up from the club. You held his hand the entire drive home and tucked him into bed with a kiss on the forehead and a promise to see him in the morning.

You might not outright say it, but you like Soobin. Your actions scream louder than any word. 

He just wants you to be happy, and if that means he has to suck it up and let you ruin him for your own dignity, he’d do it, absolutely.

The sound of the front door opening has him sitting up, his senses high alert. You were finally home.

Yesterday after you had rejected his gifts, you unexpectedly spent the night at Minjeong’s. You claimed it was because she was feeling extra lonely since Valentine’s Day would have been her anniversary with her ex, but Soobin knows better than that.

You open the door and immediately you two make eye contact, faces frozen in fear.

“Hi,” You choke out, hurrying to lock the door and take your shoes off. “Hey,” Soobin stands up, awkwardly stuffing his hands into his pockets. 

You purse your lips and drop your bag onto the dining table, almost waiting for him to speak first. He doesn’t want to, but he does.

“How was Minjeong?” He asks, voice dry. “She’s holding up alright,” You clear your throat. He nods though you don’t see as you busy yourself in the kitchen. 

“So, um, I was thinking we need-” “Hey Soobin,” You interrupt him. He looks up and sees you staring right back at him.

“I-” You take a deep breath. “I’m sorry about how I reacted yesterday, You were just being nice, and I see that now. Thank you, really, for the gifts.” You smile at him, but it’s not genuine.

“It’s nothing,” He lies through his teeth and returns your smile. You sigh and look relieved. As you disappear into the bedroom, Soobin remains standing in the middle of the apartment, just as confused as before.

You’re staring so hard at the couch, Soobin is starting to think you’re trying to mentally set it on fire or something.

“No, it’s too long, and the color is too light and I don’t like the material.” You decide and shake your head. He scoffs, and follows you as you walk down the aisle to the next one.

Currently, he was stuck inside of an Ikea with you, in search of a new couch. And you were taking it very seriously.

The only thing was that his old one was completely fine, it was a little beat up from the last couple of years of wear and tear, but it was still sturdy.

But he needed to get you out of the house, and what better way than making up a fake excuse to go out and furniture shop?

After Seollal at his family’s house, you’ve been depressed, and for good reason. His sister’s forced confession damaged not only his reputation, but your mental health. To Soobin that was not acceptable.

You already struggled with your own family, he’s seen it with his own eyes how broken you become when your parents disowned you.

Not to mention your recent mental breakdown at 2 am. You’d woken up in tears, sobbing so hard he was afraid you’d break.

He refused to see you hurt like that again, so he was going to use everything in his power to make you feel better.

“What about that one?” He drags you to a different showroom, this one was a stark difference from the fake and moody one you two were just at. It’s bright with pops of color coming from the house plants and window drapes.

But you frown, shaking your head as you watch Soobin sit on the neon blue sofa. “No, that thing looks so uncomfortable. And it’s way too small, your legs barely fit.”

Soobin gets up and sighs, following you as you examine each and every showroom with the eyes of a hawk. You guys barely arrived 30 minutes ago, but he was already wanting to go home.

“How about that one? It’s kind of nice.” He suggests, pointing to an earthy green mid century modern sofa. 

“The color isn’t cute, I want something practical.” You argue, already onto the next showroom.

He doesn’t even know why he’s trying to help when you already have a vision. But seeing you act all serious has him worked up. He liked it when you were direct and stern, it turned him on.

“Oh what about this! This is cute! And it’ll fit in the living room.” You plot yourself onto a beige loveseat, sinking into the cushions. 

“Whatever you want.” He smiles, enjoying your interests. You pat the seat beside you and he sits down, leaning all the way back. 

“Not bad, right?” You look at him expectantly. “It’s kind of stiff, but we just have to break it in.” 

He turns to you and smiles, you looked like you were actually enjoying yourself for once. 

“Come on, let’s go to the next one, maybe we should get a sectional!” You stand up and pull him with you, leading him to another room.

One by one you try out each couch, not fully satisfied.

“This is the last one, “ Soobin warns. “Just sit,” You roll your eyes and the two of you sit side by side. This sofa was dark gray in color, three seats with a chaise lounge included, and extra soft.

“Woah, it’s like sitting in cotton candy.” You sigh. “I don’t want to get up, this is bad.” Soobin nods in agreement. You close your eyes and lean against him. 

“I think this is the one. I could nap here all day.” You yawn. “Are you sure it’s not just because you’re tired?” He teases. You pinch his side, making him giggle. 

I want this one. Maybe a lighter shade of gray if they have it,” You add. Soobin hums, too lazy to find the tag right at this moment to keep note of which sofa to buy.

Right now, here with you was perfect. Even if you guys were in a crowded furniture store with hundreds of other people who were busy shopping.

He couldn’t care less where you two were, it could be in the middle of nowhere, a haunted house, a busy freeway. Soobin would go anywhere for you.

As long as he’s got you, everything will be okay.

Soobin thought that when you got pregnant, your lust would die down. 

It did not. In fact it was amplified.

“We can’t do this here, I’m at work.” He tries to push you off him, but you’re persistent, kissing up and down his neck. 

“We’re at a work party, you're off the clock, and no one is here. We’re alone.” You insist, rubbing his hard on through his pants. “You like it don’t you? You like it when I let you fuck me anytime anywhere.” You mock him.

It was true, while he lived the comfort of having sex at home, he can’t forget the adrenaline you give him when you two are out and about.

But fucking inside of conference room where just a few feet away all of his coworkers are socializing and could potentially hear or catch you two? That was a bit terrifying.

“Please? Fuck I’m so horny,” You whine, already unbuttoning his shirt. “You look so good I can’t help it.” 

This is news to Soobin. The theme for this year’s annual work celebration was Blast from the Past! so he’d gone and worn a denim on denim look: a denim button up paired with a random tie and jeans. His hair was down and messy, and he’s been eating barbecue chips for the past half hour straight.

“What?” He has to laugh, thinking you’ve gone crazy. But you don’t relent and continuing to unbuckle his pants and shoving your hand down his boxers.

He’s ashamed to admit he’s already half hard the second you pulled him into the empty room. Now your soft hands are massaging his erect cock like it’s your job, kissing up and down his exposed chest.

You’re getting on his nerves. You always act like a brat when he’s under pressure.

So he removes you from him, earning a grin from you as he pushes you against the table, seating you so that your legs are wide open for him.

“You never listen,” He scowls, lifting your dress up and pushing your panties to the side. “I’ll listen now,” You blink up at him innocently. You begin to play with yourself in order to relieve the tension, head rolling back.

Soobin slaps your hand away, grabbing your wrist and pinning you down. “Liar, you always like to test me, don’t you?” He doesn't let you answer as he quickly lines his cock to your seeping hole, sliding in without warning. 

You let out a sensual moan, fully laying down on the table now. Your free hand pulls down the top half of your dress to reveal your plump and aching tits. You look like you’re fresh from a painting. 

“Why aren’t you moving?” You groan, trying to grind yourself against him. Soobin stands there taking you in with a smirk plastered all over his face. He sees how your face begins to turn red as he refuses to look away from you.

He finally leans down, grabs you by the jaw and whispers, “Always a slut for my cock, aren’t you?” 

You gasp and clench around him. He can’t take it anymore. Without warning he begins to thrust into you like a piston, fast, swift and hard. You can’t control your moans, you’re breathing heavily as he holds both of your wrists in one single hand above your head.

The other hand quickly goes to cover your lips. “Be quiet, want someone to find us?” Soobin growls into your ear. He’s barely holding on himself as he mocks you. 

“You want my boss to come in here and see you all fucked out on my dick, yeah baby?” He threatens and you can only bite your tongue. “Don’t worry baby, no one but me gets to see you like this,”

“All hot and wet for me and me only, right?” You nod desperately and he removes his hand from your mouth. “You love my cock so much you just had to have my baby, didn’t you?” His hand goes to rub your swollen stomach, before traveling down to your clit. 

“F-Fuck!” You squeak out as he simultaneously plays with your clit and pumps you full. “God you’re so fucking tight, I-I’m gonna cum,” His tough act begins to crumble as he struggles to chase his own high.

“Want me to cum in you baby? Or you wanna drink it up like a good girl?” He brushes a lock of hair out of your face, caressing your cheek. 

“Don’t pull out I’m so close,” You cry, hands searching for him. You were always pretty, but seeing you beg for him was something else. Soobin can’t help but kiss you, ramming into you with so much intensity and vulgarness he completely forgets where you two are. 

You cum in seconds, he follows you with insane speed, the way you convulse around him has him falling through the cracks. You’re both breathless and tired, but your lips stay connected.

Eventually he peels himself off you, pulling his softening dick out of your warmth. Both of you are sticky and wet, sweating like you’ve run a marathon. But his eyes are trained on your pussy as his cum leaks out, thick and white.

Unconsciously he sticks a finger into your sore hole, pushing it back in. You wince, catching your breath. “Soobin-” 

He shuts you up by sticking that same finger into your mouth. “I don’t want to waste a drop.”

“Beomgyu! Get your ass over here and help me with this banner!” Jimin orders, she spots Beomgyu hiding behind a tree. The man sulks as he’s been found, trudging over to the canopy. 

“I never signed up for this! I just came to drop off the catering” He whines, but Jimin doesn’t care, handing him the banner to hang. 

“Can you shut up? At least you’re not lugging around the damn table!” Yeonjun yells. He’s currently dragging the folding table all over the patio area, under orders from Ningning.

“More to the left- no my left! No go back, more to the right now- your right!” She tells him and he obediently listens, though he seems tired. 

“Hi! We picked up the cupcakes!” Minjeong sings as she and Aeri arrive, though they’re not carrying a thing. “Uh, where?” Soobin asks, confused. 

“Here! We offered to help,” Taehyun announces as he and Kai waltz over to the canopy, carrying the boxes of cupcakes. “Low sugar with whipped cream frosting,” Aeri recites as she and Minjeong begin to organize the food on another table.

“We need chairs! Where are the chairs? Beomgyu you were supposed to bring the chairs!” Jimin glares. “I would grab the chairs, but I’m holding your stupid banner!” He argues.

“Go get the chairs! Ugh, Kai, help me with the banner, you’re taller.” She waves off Beomgyu. 

“Well, looks like the baby shower planning is going well,” Soobin jokes as Yeonjun approaches, finally free from Ningning’s grasp. 

“What are you doing? Don’t just stand there, do something!” He complains. “Nope, I’m gonna go pick up Y/n’s dress and drop it off, then I’ve got to grab the drinks and ice.” Soobin states. 

“Save me!” Beomgyu sobs, only for Jimin to glare at him again. “Hurry up! We need more chairs!”

“Actually, I can grab the dress, Minjeong and I are gonna leave to go do Y/n’s hair and makeup anyways,” Aeri checks the time. “But you can take Beomgyu with you, I think Jimin might burst a vein if she has to be with him for another minute.” Minjeong whispers. 

Soobin sends her a thumbs up and pulls his best friend away from starting a spat with Jimin. “Let’s go grab the drinks! We’ll be back.” Soobin waves a goodbye.

“Turn on the A/C, I’m melting,” Beomgyu groans as he jumps into the passenger seat. The cool air hits his face, refreshing the pair. 

“So, why are you guys throwing a baby shower again? I thought you guys were gonna chuck the baby or something?” Beomgyu asks. Soobin punches his arm, making him cry. 

“We are not chucking the baby, we’re just giving the baby up for adoption for the time being.” He corrects. 

Beomgyu looks confused. “For the time being? You mean you plan to get custody later?” Soobin goes quiet.

If he were being honest, he might be a bit attached already to your unborn son. He hasn’t said anything, but he can’t bear to even think about signing the adoption papers. 

“No,” He sighs. “I just- I might just ask for full custody if Y/n says no.” He admits. Beomgyu’s eyes bulge out of his head. “So you’re saying you’d become a single dad?!” 

Soobin slowly nods. The idea was daunting, but he believes he could do it. He knows his mom will help, they’ve spoken a few times privately since Seollal. He considered moving back home to make his life a bit easier if it came down to it.

“Soobin, you can’t be serious, this isn’t some kind of game you can speedrun. This is a real human being that you’re gonna have to raise for 18 years-” “I know Beomgyu,” Soobin says tensely. 

“But you don’t get it.” He clenches his jaw. “You won’t get it until you’re in that room, and the doctor shows you the ultrasound and you get to see your baby grow- did you know you can hear their heartbeat?!” Soobin stops at the red light, looking over his best friend with desperation in his eyes. 

“I can’t get the sound out of my head.” He reveals. Beomgyu goes silent. 

“And what about Y/n? You said you’d do anything for her, right?”

Soobin continues the drive, eyes trained on the road. “Yeah, but maybe not this time.”

The car is quiet again, the radio so low it’s a whisper. Beomgyu suddenly lets out a howl, his head leaning against the glass window. 

“You’re insane,” He mumbles. “But you’re also my best friend. So if you’re really going to go through with this, I’ll be there.” 

Soobin smiles. “Thanks Beomgyu, I appreciate it.” The other man just nods, looking out the window. 

“Just so you know, I’ll help out but I am not changing any poop diapers. Give those all to Yeonjun.” Soobin begins to laugh, feeling relieved from his friend’s support.

He waits until you’re asleep. Outside on the balcony, the air is cool and there’s a slight breeze. It’s way past midnight and he’s struggling to keep his eyes open as he presses the call button. It rings five times before his mom picks up.

“Hello?” She sounds like he’s just woken up. ‘Hey mom, sorry, did I wake you?” He worries. 

“Huh? No, no, I’m fine,” She lies. “How are you? Did you eat today?” She asks. “Yeah, yeah,” He answers.

They go through the formalities, checking on each other’s health, asking about their days and such. But eventually, as the night goes on, the topic changes to something more serious.

“And how is the baby?” Soobin goes stiff. “Fine, the doctor says he’s healthy.” He hears his mom hum on the other line.

Silence.

“Are you still going to give up my grandbaby?”

He hates this question.

“Soobin, are you listening to me?” She repeats and he fights the urge to yawn, losing as he leans against the railing of his balcony. “I’m listening.” He assures her.

His mother sighs, mumbling something under her breath. “You do know what you’re doing right? That baby deserves to be with his dad and mom.”

“No yeah, I know,” He hums. This was the fifth time they’ve had this conversation in the last two months.

“I know that you and Y/n are struggling, but that’s why your father and I are here. We love you Soobin, and we love Y/n too, please don’t do this.”

He closes his eyes, making a face. “Don’t say that.” He urges. “But why? You two are so good together. You love her, why can’t you two make this work for your son? Put your differences aside! Couples have differences and fight all the time, you two need to learn to compromise.” 

Maybe it was because it was late and he was extremely tired, or maybe it was because he hated the way his mom talked about his relationship with you like she knew better. But either way Soobin snaps. 

“Y/n and I- We- stop acting as if we’re dating mom, you know we aren’t.” He sighs and rubs his face. “You can stop pretending.” The line is quiet, and he wonders if he should just say goodnight and end the call.

Out of the corner of his eye, he sees something from inside move. “Hold on,” He murmurs. “I think Y/n’s up.” He immediately mutes the call, tip toeing inside. He makes his way to the bedroom, from the door he sees you cuddled up with the blanket. Your back faces him. 

“No she’s still asleep,” He says into the phone as he unmutes the call. As he turns to leave, he shuts the door. He doesn’t want you to hear any of this.

“Soobin, I just want what’s best for you,” His mother finally says. “How do you know this is good for me? For all you know, I could be digging my own grave,” He argues, stepping back outside onto the balcony.

He hears his mom shuffle, then hum. “Well, I see how you are with her, and my son, you glow.” His heart aches as he hears her speak with such sincerity. “You look at each other with love, and now you can share that love with your baby. You two just need to sit down and talk.”

“I-”

Soobin sucks in a breath. He can’t speak. He can’t respond, argue. Because he wants his mother to be right, he desperately does. Just the idea of living that fantasy of growing a family with you was enough to bring him to his knees. 

He’s tried so hard to get you to like him back, so hard to break down your walls. He just wants to be able to love you openly. No more lies and secrets.

The only thing stopping him is you.

“I’m gonna go to bed mom,” He bites his cheek, holding back. “Okay,” he can hear the tone of his mom. She’s disappointed. He hears that more often these days. 

“I’ll talk to you next time, okay?” They bid farewell and instead of going back to bed with you and sleeping his stress away, Soobin goes to the living room and sits on the couch.

The one you picked out and he built.

He doesn’t realize he’s fallen asleep there until the early morning when the sun blinds him. Quietly he slips back into the bedroom and into the mattress next to you.

Just like last night, your lonely back faces him.

“Y/N!” Soobin bursts into your hospital room looking like he’s run through hell and back. He scares you awake, Beomgyu jumping up from his spot on the waiting chair. 

“You made it! Thank God,” Beomgyu looks more relieved than Soobin. “I was starting to get worried, they said I would have to go into the room with her when it was time to push,” He gags. “Thanks,” Soobin pats him on the back as Beomyu slips out of the room as soon as possible.

His attention turns to you.

You’re sitting on the hospital bed, wearing your gown and hair in a mess. Just like him your tears have dried up on your face, leaving streaks.

He hesitates.

His body wants to move, his legs are screaming at him to run to you, pull you into a hug, kiss your face and promise to never leave you alone again.

But his brain stops him. Just hours ago you’d rejected him and broken his heart into a million pieces.

You suddenly start sniffling, and his body reacts automatically, coming to your side. He can’t bring himself to hold you just yet, so he settled by petting your hair as you cry.

“I’m sorry,” He begins to apologize. “I’m sorry, I didn’t- I should have- I was being stupid and I-” He shuts up when you lurch forward and hug his waist, sobbing into his shirt. 

He finally relaxes and leans over to sit on the edge of the bed, pulling you closer. “I’m an idiot I know,” He murmurs and kisses your head. “Please forgive me,”

You can’t even answer him properly, you're crying so hard your body is shaking violently. So instead he just holds you, holds like you're made of glass until you fall back asleep from the pure exhaustion this entire night has been. 

Soobin lays you back down, wiping your tears from your cheeks.

You didn’t deserve him. He was a jerk, and he could never forgive himself for what he’s done to you. He was selfish for trying to force you to pursue him, for feeding into his own desires. If only he could go back in time.

Quietly, he attempts to leave you to rest on the little stiff loveseat by the window. Except the grip tightens around his hand. He looks up to find you awake again.

“You should try to rest, you’ll need the energy.” He tells you, though he doesn’t move.

You shake your head, confusing him. But suddenly you scoot over, and gesture for him to lay with you. Soobin is surprised. After everything tonight, you still want him around.

Feeling guilty, he struggles to squeeze in without hurting you. But once he’s next to you, you snuggle into his side, your head resting on his chest. He holds you dearly, his other hand playing with your fingers as if to distract himself.

“You were right, you know,” You suddenly speak up, breaking the comfortable silence. Soobin quirks an eyebrow, confused on what you were talking about. 

You shift so that you could face him.

Even with your tired eyes, tear stained cheeks and pouty lips, your beauty amazes him. He feels lucky just to have made eye contact with you.

“I love you,” You whisper, as if you were scared to speak up. “What?” He mumbles, unable to believe you.

“I love you Soobin,” You repeat. “I… I’ve been lying to myself, to you. I’ve loved you for a long time now. I’m sorry.” You look away, feeling ashamed. Your tears return and he does you a favor by gently guiding you to look at him again. 

Delicately, Soobin kisses you. His heart begins to bloom as you two become intertwined. This was all he could ever want, and you’ve finally gifted him his greatest award: your love. 

“Do you hate me?” You ask in between kisses. He smirks. “How could I ever hate you baby?” He teases, kissing your salty tears away. “Because I’m such an asshole, and you always treat me so well,” You hiccup. 

His lips return to yours as a way to reassure you. “I love you so much. There’s nothing you could do that could make me hate you.”

You shudder under his touch, pulling him by his collar, trying to get closer. Your anguish has him pulling away faster than you or he wants.

“You need to rest,” He insists, despite the fact that he’d rather kiss you for longer. But he can see and tell you’re exhausted. He can sacrifice his affections for the time being.

“Don’t go.” You pout. “I’m not going anywhere, never again.” He promises, fixing the pillows to make the both of you more comfortable.

He watches as you yawn, your sleepiness consuming you. Just before you fall asleep though, he whispers in your ear.

“Can you say it again?” 

You glance at him, eyebrows furrowed. You nuzzle into the crook of his neck and sigh. “I love you Soobin,” You mumble into his soft skin.

And his heart soars, he’d been waiting to hear those words all along.

“I spend nine- almost ten months carrying him in my womb, and he comes out looking just like you,” You frown. “It’s like I’ve been scammed.”

“He’s got your uh, your eyebrows I think? Baby it’s okay, look how cute he is,” Soobin giggles as he sits beside your hospital bed, carrying your sleeping son. He’s been in the outside world for a total of three hours, yet he’s the cutest baby ever.

“Eunjae, you’re gonna be handsome just like your daddy, huh?” You lean over to gently boop the baby’s nose.

“Eunjae? When did you pick a name?” Soobin asks, you two had never really talked about names ever. “He picked it himself,” You shrug.

Soobin is even more confused now. “What do you mean he picked it himself, Y/n he’s three hours old.” 

Before you can answer, there’s a knock on your door. “Hi mom and dad! How are we doing?” The nurse asks as he comes in holding what seems to be paperwork.

“Good so far.” Soobin answers. “Great! I’ve actually got some documents for you guys to sign, as well as the birth certificate,”

He hands you the papers, and you read over them. As you flip through the documents, you stop at a specific one.

“Um actually, we aren’t going to be needing this one anymore,” You hand the nurse the paper, he reads it over. “Sounds good, I’ll come back later once everything is filled. Let one of us know if you have any questions.” He says as he departs.

“What was it that you gave back?” Soobin asks. You’re already signing some papers as you speak. “The adoption papers.” You don’t look at him, but Soobin is smiling.

You finally look up at him and smile back, this one was real and filled with pure love. 

“We can’t give up on this little guy, he’s too adorable,” You coo as you poke your son’s cheek. The baby squirms in his arms before resuming his sleep.

Soobin watches as you fill out the birth certificate, there’s a weird sense of pride he feels as you complete the documents. 

“You know I like the name, Eunjae.” He agrees. “Well you better like it, I already wrote it down on the certificate with permanent marker,” You joke, making him chuckle. He leans down and presses a kiss to your temple.

“I love you,” You say. He smiles at you. “You’ve told me that like 150 times since last night.” He pretends to complain. 

“And I never get tired of saying it.” You grin, sealing your vow with a kiss. And for Soobin, he never gets tired of hearing those three words, patiently waiting for the next time they slip from your lips.

He’d wait for you tomorrow, the next day, a week from now, a month, a year, a decade, a century and for eternity. 

[maaeveeee]

Hi! I was wondering if u could do first kiss with Snotlout? Thx!!!

The GIF will be updated with an HD version after the movie releases, allowing me to obtain scene packs.

Pairing: Live Action x female!reader

Author’s note: I'm not sure how I feel about writing anything with kissing or just mild intimacy. But it was fun to try! No title for this one lol

You were busily getting the training equipment ready when you noticed him behind you again.

He never was quiet — never was — but the steps had some odd rhythmic quality to them, snappy and expressive, as if he was running over to make some kind of point and already was frustrated with himself.

You did not turn around. Not yet. He would speak or he would not.

He stopped a couple of steps away. You couldn’t help but feel him gazing at you, his weight moving from one leg to the other.

It was like you were by a fire that couldn’t quite decide whether it would warm you up or burn the entire arm off.

“I don’t know you,” he stated.

You breathed from your nose, grabbed the next spool of rope, and never said one word. He despised that. You knew he did.

"I mean it," he replied. "You're sitting next to me one minute – you know, not even saying anything, but you're just sitting next to me. Then the next day you're acting like I'm just some dude yellin' at space."

You did the eyebrow thing. “You do yell quite a bit.”

“I'm ready to talk.”

You gazed at him over your shoulder. Already he regretted bringing the topic up, his jaw clenched, his arms folded, bracing for the impact.

You unwound the rope and stood before him to confront him in the face.

"Did you come over to say I confuse you?" you asked.

He didn’t blink, but some of him yielded. Less covered, more worn down. Like in he’s been trying to think this one out by himself and just couldn’t.

“I came over here because I don’t know if to keep at it or to just leave it be,” he explained in softer tone now. “I’m not good at this kind of thing, okay? I make poor jokes. I pretend as if it’s all funny because if I’m not being more rowdy, I don’t know how to be.”

“I’m not going to mess it up,” he growled. “Whatever… this is.”

You were silent. Not because you lacked words, but because you were observing the manner in which he was gazing at you — trapped between defending himself and fleeing from him.

The gaze you had seen before, only never focused at you. Not this close. Not like this.

He rubbed the back of his neck, looked away. “You're just difficult to understand at times. And I would assume you think you're full of yourself. Like this is just one more thing you're trying to win.”

You adjusted your weight, your jaw snapping shut just briefly. “You don’t understand.”

He sprang back to you. “Then explain it.”

You opened your mouth. Closed it again. And just looked at him — not because you couldn’t think of what to say, but because he was at it again. Whirling.

Spouting nonsense in circles. He did this whenever he dipped in close to the truth. Got muddled and twisted and messed it around before anything would happen to it.

You advanced towards him.

He froze, blinked, waited. “I’m just saying—if this is nothing, that’s cool, but if it’s not, maybe just—”

You kissed him.

You just reached out your hand, grasped him by the front of the shirt, and shut him down.

It was not desperate. Not sentimental. Just clean, blunt contact. His lips on yours, rigid and immobile for one moment — long enough you would think he would pull back — and then he didn't.

His hands cringed as though he did not quite know where to place them. You noted the skepticism in his breath, the stiffening for just one moment, the pulling back — as though he just affirmed it to be so.

He kissed you back with abandon. Too harsh at first, not enough later, as if he was re—tuning by the second. You didn’t worry. Perfect was the last thing you needed. All you desired was for it to happen at last.

When you pulled back, it was only a few inches. You didn’t let go of his shirt.

His eyes were still half closed. Lips parted. Face flushed like someone had just landed a hit that actually rattled him.

He gazed at you as if he must say something to you — possibly some ridiculous thing, some counter—indicated thing — and you halted him before he did.

“Be quiet.” you added.

His lips parted once more. You lifted your eyebrow.

He closed it.

good.

[offdxty]

Something akin to genuine surprise seems to appear within dark irises at the other coming closer, at Harrow taking a seat next to him, on the bed, rather than on the floor. That tired gazes watches, observes, takes in the sight... and Kane listens, of course he does, because he's always listening, always consuming any information given.

So that's what he does - listens and takes in the spoken syllables, the meaning behind them. The way the other repeats that he isn't going to be a friend - Kane takes it, accepts it, he can work with that - but that he also doesn't want him to fail. That this, the Doctor's line of work, isn't giving him satisfaction; He's beginning to see Kane shape into a someone, so he invests---

---This is the first time that Kane, not-Kane, it, is exposed to this kind of statement, and it causes him to pause for a brief moment, lips pressing into a tight line. He is shaping into a someone? Something sparks inside him because of that, something bright, something that, for the briefest moment of a second, eats through all the pressure inside his chest.

An expression softens again, eyes returning to the tired state they're in, followed by that gaze falling away, Kane's head turning back around to face his hands instead of the man next to him. A swallow, a quick inhale of air, thumbs that trace each other and follow the subtle creases of skin wrapping around bone, tissue, muscles, sinews.

"...I didn't mean to do that." He truly didn't. Kane blinks, then sighs, eyes now on the wall in front of them - at the opposite side of the room, focusing on an imaginary point there, with his voice remaining gentle, without accusation. "I just... ---I thought - I supposed... that it's not known, that I... am affected by it. I wanted to express that - I felt the need to do that." A brief pause. "I myself wasn't aware of the fact that I was feeling all of those sensations, but... I did. ...I wanted to make sure it's known that what happened sits inside me, and that I think of it. That I feel it. ---That I didn't just... take it and---"

A hand moves, making a gesture - an imaginary ball of crumpled paper being thrown into an equally as imaginary trashcan.

The very same hand returns to his lap then, sliding along his abdomen as it does, before thumbs are tracing each other again - circling, touching, feeling. Kneading knuckles, as if trying to map out the shape of them.

Kane keeps avoiding Dr. Harrow's gaze as the seconds pass, silence stretches. The hum of electricity continues to flood the entirety of what this room is, and Kane's jaw works for a moment - teeth grinding together, a sore tongue sliding along the roof of his mouth, feeling the texture where that bite has begun to heal, created a bit of a bump that's irritating Kane now. It is what it is. He takes it, tries to ignore its existence.

"... I think I'm sad."

It's still a bit complicated for him, the act of naming whatever might be going on inside his mind; He can distinguish the sensations by now, able to differentiate between a positive and a negative emotion rising inside him. But... naming them? It's hard. It's complicated, as said.

He can only work off of what he thinks might be right, what his mind provides him with - information he himself hasn't used before, but it exists, just like so many things seem to exist that he himself has to truly see first to know they're there.

"---But it's also.... heavy. Just very, very heavy. I don't think that it was ever meant to happen - that any of it was meant to happen in the first place. That there was purpose behind Kane's pain... ---I don't think it was meant to exist, yet it did. It's... not fair."

It's not fair that Kane, not-Kane, it, is sitting here, talking to Dr. Harrow, while Kane... is not. ---An interesting thought to have; Kane has never really thought about it before, never considered it to even be a concept, but here he is.

Existential dread? Doubt?

A sudden, almost frustrated exhale of air as a hand is brought up to exhausted features, eyes closing, the heel of a palm pressing into those eyesockets, creating sparks of light on the plane of darkness in the process. He rubs the skin for a few seconds, then the same hand continues to trail over his forehead, combs into dark locks, pushes them out of his face and against the shape of his head.

They don't stay. They're stubborn - and very curly indeed.

"... You saying that we're not friends, it... did something to me as well." A silent admission, muttered under his breath as that hand falls to a thigh, with Kane blinking his eyes back open, accompanied by another sigh. "--But I understand, and it makes sense. To hear it spoken out like that was just---" Perhaps humans would call it a reality check of sorts; Kane does not know what that is, so he cannot compare. "---I don't know. It just was. And that's okay. I don't need to talk about it. ... ---I guess there's purpose to it, at least... whereas it feels as if purpose is lacking anywhere else."

He not asking Harrow to dwell on it - just wanted to bring it up, to mention it, to let the other know that it had also caused a bit of a thought-process to happen there.

A brief glance from the corner of his eye, over to where that man is still sitting, before it flicks away again.

Dr. Harrow didn’t interrupt, having no reason to. People told on themselves, when given silence - and Kane didn’t seem to have anything against talking. Arthur listened quietly, stilling even more - his gaze followed the gesture to the stomach, though his eyes only softened marginally. 

One bite of bread, that was all he could stomach. Disappointing. Frustrating. 

“You’re reacting to stress,” he said plainly. “You’re not the first patient I’ve had, who feels sick the moment their feelings become inconvenient. The body fights, so that the mind doesn’t have to. It’s a coward’s defense mechanism.” 

He wasn’t angry. He was just factual - maybe slightly irritated, though only in the way a teacher could be with a student. Kane knew better - or, at least, he should know better. 

“… I’m not your friend,” he repeated. “You wouldn't want me as a friend. But I didn’t say I want you to fail.” He let that sit. He didn’t want anything closer than that - the thought of getting closer to the other made him want to do nothing but reject him entirely, shove him as far away as possible. Perhaps that had happened, the day before. 

“I’m here because I want to see what you become. That’s the truth. Not because I’m going to hold your hand - I’m not - and not because I get ‘satisfaction’ from doing my job. I don’t. I think you’re something that was created in the wrong way - but, somehow, you’re starting to shape into someone. And I think that’s rare enough for me to invest myself into.” 

His brow creased, just faintly, for the first time, as his eyebrows rose. Long fingers tapped, briefly, on the curve of his cane. After a moment, Arthur exhaled, closing the space between them and sitting down on the bed. 

“… I wasn’t angry with what you said, yesterday,” he voiced. “I was angry with the meaning you attempted to put behind it. You took something painful, something real, and you tried to use it as leverage. As proof that you felt. It’s… an irresponsible thing to do, with pain like that.” 

He glanced away for a moment, before looking back to Kane. There was no warmth in his eyes, but no cruelty either; just a rare sliver of something softer, more human.

“That kind of pain doesn’t need an audience. You’re allowed to feel it, you should feel it - but you shouldn’t use your pain as armor. You shouldn’t challenge people with it, like it’s a weapon in your back pocket.” That was the core of what frustrated him; the root of his irritation with the man, right now. 

“It diminishes the meaning. Kane’s death shouldn’t be the point you make. Your pain isn’t what you use, to take a measurement. You can feel without these… severities. You can feel small things. But pain should be felt, not brandished.” 

It irritated him, to bring up pain as if it were anything that needed to be public. It was cheapening something sacred, to speak on Kane’s death in that way - it was immoral. It was cruel - it was selfish. It was childish. Weaponizing trauma was childish. 

Kane was a child. 

Arthur inhaled again at the thought, exhaling slowly. “… Tell me about it,” he prompted. “About Kane. About how it makes you feel. If you’d like to, I mean - it might help with your stomach.” 

[stellamancer]

selfship coded. juni's fault again. more semi-proofread nonsense. featuring what mao called the most deranged kiss.

The fire in your eyes is really quite lovely.

Sunday remembers a time when he found it infuriating, when he despised the flame of defiance that glimmers so brightly in your gaze. Back then, seeing it burned him in a way, to the point that he wanted little more than to stomp it out, your obstinacy only barely tolerable by Robin's grace.

Things are different now. While he can't deny that are times that he feels your stubborn nature is quite frustrating, Sunday finds it rather satisfying when you ultimately yield to him. Admittedly, it can be a challenge, but that makes it all the more rewarding when you finally fold.

Sunday smiles at you, a forgery of innocence, as he holds your chin in place, forcing you to keep looking at him while his thumb presses down on your tongue. It's abundantly clear you have something to say about the situation he's put you in, but— "Having issues?"

Rather than attempt to voice your response, you answer by merely glowering at him. Then, you gently bring your teeth down on his thumb, applying enough pressure to serve as a warning, as a threat.

Albeit an empty one.

"You're free to bite me if you wish," he tells you amicably, calling your bluff. "But don't think that means I'll let go."

You stare at him, considering your options before the pressure from your teeth subsides and you let out a frustrated little huff. It's actually quite cute, but Sunday can't let himself get distracted or you'll use his inattention to yank yourself from his grasp.

Instead, your mouth twitches ever so slightly. You're still cycling through what to do next. If biting won't work, then the next course of action would likely be a different approach. And in this case, that would be—

No. You would never play into his hands so easily. It's a shame, though. Things would be so much easier if you weren't so dead set on being difficult, but…

Sunday knows better than anyone else that you love the fight.

You grumble. Annoyed. But not enough to stop indulging his little game.

"So, what would you like me to do next?" Sunday asks calmly.

The response is yet another glare: you want him to release you, that much is obvious.

"I'm afraid you'll have to use your words this time," he tells you with saccharine sympathy. "You've been leering at me for so long that it's become difficult to distinguish one look from the other."

"Booffit." Your response is automatic and Sunday can't help but chuckle.

Despite his words, you continue to scowl at him. But you should know that you can't win a battle of patience against him, not when you both know that he could easily force your hand.

"I asked you a question," he reminds you gently. "It would be rude to not answer."

This time you growl, and in response, Sunday applies more pressure, his thumb inadvertently slipping further into your mouth in order to do so. Your tongue pushes against his finger as you try to answer. "Wep—"

You stop suddenly and force your head down, lips wrapping around him. Sunday realizes this is more likely a bodily reaction rather than a conscious response. Gag reflex triggered by the sudden pressure, perhaps. You don't move for a moment, waiting for your body to relax before you tilt your head back up, and forcefully try to speak. "Wepmewo!"

Sunday stares at you, or rather your watery eyes, glimmering angrily at him. Then, he removes his hand from your mouth, but before you can complain or say anything at all he leans in, replacing the thumb that was just in your mouth with his own tongue, gently gliding it over yours in an attempt to soothe it.

You don't move at first, probably unsure of what to do, but before you decide, Sunday pulls away just slightly, breaking the kiss.

"My apologies," he says softly, genuinely. "I didn't mean to make you gag."

"Then don't go trying to make people talk when you've got your fingers in their mouth, you sick bastard."

Sunday hums, "Alright, fair enough."

if you read this far, i hope you enjoyed, esp since i shoved my fingers into my mouth so many times for this LMAO.

[egglit-the-determined]

Yar har har! There be Expedition 33 spoilers in these waters!!

I find it so interesting how, intentionally or not, Clair Obscur pushes you towards Maelle's perspective by virtue of your relationship as a player in a game? I don't know how universal this experience is but I always feel a sense of.. impending dread when I know a game I'm playing is about to end. I'll procrastinate, stall, do all the side content, run in circles, get every dialogue line out of every character. I did this in Persona 5, I did this in Red Dead Redemption 2, and I did it in Clair Obscur. What I think is interesting (and relevant bare with me) is that this process pushes me from an emotional experience with the art into a purely player-driven experience. When I was in the middle of the experience I cared for these characters, lived their lives, saw their struggles and identified with them. Then, the game threatened to end and suddenly I wasn't Joker or Arthur or Verso, I was me. My immersion was shattered, and I didn't want my game to end just yet. I kinda initially thought of Act 3 as a lowpoint for Clair Obscur? (And honestly I kinda still do) The endings are fantastic but the open world isn't strong enough to carry an act, and its frustrating trying to go to new places just to get your ass beat because you're level 55 and this dumbass is level 90+. But it also meant I spent the last couple hours of my playthrough... Stalling for time? Running in circles, doing stuff not because I thought it'd help the characters, or progress the story, but because I was having fun, and I didn't wanna stop having fun. And then you get to the end, you smack Renoir upside the head and then... Verso threatens to end the game. And he deserves to! He's been playing this game for decades longer than Maelle, or even you. and I've already made a post about how I feel his position is the better one. But... He wants to end the game!!! He wants to kill Esquie, and Monoco, and Sciel, and Lune!! And I like these characters, I don't want to stop seeing them!

And... Maelle doesn't either. Maelle, who's lived experience in Lumiere can barely compete with the lifetime she spent honing her god-like abilities, abilities that make her unchallenged as a diety in this space. Maelle, who has literally been a player in this game, playing with Monoco and Esquie alongside Verso - the 'real' Verso. Maelle, who's memories as an orphan being passed from parent to parent are barely relevant compared to her memories as a literal child playing in what she always knew was a fictional space. She sees that the game is about to end, and in her grief, and her misery, she doesn't want that. She wants to stall, to run in circles, to say everything to everybody, to sit Verso down at that piano and demand he play, because if he plays, the game can't end. And as players, as people who also don't want this experience to end, we've been primed to empathise with that position. And there's a noticable change in Maelle in A Life To Paint. She barely smiles, even after seeing Gustave and Sophie, the obstensible reason she's still playing this game at all. Her relationship to this world has shifted. When the game threatened to end it snapped her out of her immersion, she stopped being a presence within it and fully became a player. The closest she gets to smiling is when she forces Verso to sit and play. When Verso, in his own tiny way, attempts to make the game end once again, and she denies him. Lune and Sciel move and gesticulate, but no words come out of their mouths. In the same way that no words came out when I spent 3 hours farming those hand guys at Dark Shores, or doing those fuck ass Gestral minigames. At this point they're barely people. They're objects, they're signifiers. They exist in that opera house to signal to us that the characters we like are still around, and to signal to Maelle that the game doesn't have to end just yet. But what they think? How they feel? How their friend's presence as a god that could shatter their world if she ever decided to confront her loss has affected their relationship to her? We don't need to know. It's not relevant. They're characters in a game. And the game doesn't have to end just yet.

[starwrittenfates]

She quietly listened to him, taking his wonders into consideration and with deep thought before her face turned red at his statement concerning her and Galahad. "That's thinking a little too hard and deeply into the topic, don't you think? Why would I-- with Galahad--- what?!" Ciri stuttered.

This forced her to cross her arms again, trying to hide her embarrassment. She had never considered doing such a thing with him, but then again, wasn't this all the point of it -- making her think on the subject with such thought.

Ciri sighed with frustration. "Fine. I'll think on the matter and consider all options and risks and whatever else. Can we just drop this already? I'm tired and I think I'll retire for the night."

Besides, there were far more important matters on her mind than this. Like Geralt and Yennefer and Camelot's safety for one. Eredin wouldn't stop or spare anyone until she was in his grasp again. The thought filled her with dread.

"I'm fairly certain that I can succeed where the Witchers failed." He had been studying genetics under Auberon's instructions perhaps longer than the Witchers had existed. After all time did pass differently from world to world. "There will still be risks, but if I tailor it to your genetics I could greatly mitigate that risk." Sighing he placed his hands on the rail, bracing himself. "I want you to take time to think about it. To really think about it." "I've only considered this because it may finally present to you the freedom that you've wanted for so long." It was hard for him to put her at any risk at all. "But I dread taking away your chance at having children. I'm afraid you don't realize what you'll be missing until it is too late." Another thought crossed his mind. One she may want to take into consideration "Or when your Galahad inevitably wants children."

[gutterclan]

Moon 5 - Part 3

Longpaw asks Synthsong what he thinks about Starclan.

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