#I'm hesitating a lot whether I should show them

[memopmiff]

As a self taught artist, how many years have you been drawing. They’re really good. Trying to mentally prepare myself so I’m not too overly critical with myself.

Hello!💕 I've been drawing since I was a kid, art has always been a hobby of mine. Although I never took it seriously and I drew on and off. It's only been this past few years that I'm trying to draw more!

I'm gonna share this: I often get very critical of myself and my own art, thinking why are these artists improving so fast while I take years to see an improvement, and I get discouraged. But everyone learns at their own pace so please don't be too critical with yourself when you jump into it. You also don't need to prepare yourself, the most important thing is making sure you enjoy what you create and have fun! (It's when you draw with passion that gets the best results!)

Here I'll show you how my Azula used to look like

And this is my Azula now

It took me yearsss, much longer than most, to improve so I'm confident you'll have a better shot at this than I do!

Sorry for the long answer haha I wish you the best of luck with drawing!!

[babyangelsky]

I love that Phu was wearing his teddy bear pajamas when he got blown by Cir

And I love it specifically because it flies in the face of a rather unfortunate trend that's always been present but that has been on my mind a lot lately.

A couple of months ago, I came across a post that referred to Teerak from Your Sky as "basically a child" and went in on the show for portraying him in any sort of sexual light and then went in on Muenfah and criticized him for wanting to do anything remotely sexual with Teerak and just—

No. NO. NO!

Listen, I don't give a fuck how someone interprets a character even if I disagree on every possible level. Art is subjective. How someone sees the art they consume and what they get out of it is none of my fucking business.

But there's this awful tendency to conflate cuteness with immaturity and to infantilize any character that exhibits any traits or preferences that can be read as cute. Hell, sometimes even a character's appearance is all it takes for them to be infantilized.

And it's always the same shit. If a character is shy, soft-spoken, bubbly, cheerful, or sweet, they're seen as a child. If they have plushies and enjoy lots of color, they're seen as a child. Act cute? Child. Like cute things? Child. Shorter than their love interest? Child. Younger than their love interest? Child.

Fucking STOP.

The person who made the post I referred to used a screenshot of Teerak hugging his Snoopy plush to somehow justify their interpretation and you know what? LIKING PLUSHIES AND CUTE THINGS DOES NOT MAKE SOMEONE """"BASICALLY A CHILD"""".

Whether or not a character (or a real actual person) likes cute things or happens to be sweet and soft-spoken and shy has nothing to do with how mature they are and it certainly says nothing about their sexuality and sexual desires. I turn 31 years old in just over a week and there are plushies on my bed. I put hearts all over my blog. Liking cute things just means you like cute things! That's all!

Teerak is adorable and colorful and sweet, and he's also a young man who's deliriously in love and HORNY for his boyfriend. He ALWAYS wanted to fuck that man and if he hesitated at first, it was due only to his lack of experience. Nothing else.

Which is partly why this scene:

Was so fucking great to watch. Not just because Teerak wanted to fuck his boyfriend and made his intent crystal clear and took the initiative, but because he was allowed to by the story. @iguessitsjustme wrote a great post about it, go give it a read.

More and more we're seeing BL's where both characters (THE CUTE ONES INCLUDED) are allowed and shown to want each other sexually and it's been amazing to see. Mutual horniness will never not be amazing to see.

Allll of that is why I love that Phukan was in his teddy bear pajamas in his love scene with Cir. Because like Teerak, Phukan is exactly the type of character that gets infantilized and that people get all pearl-clutchy about when he's portrayed doing anything sexual.

Phu is adorable and colorful and he likes being babied and he collects those cute little trinket things I can't remember the name of and he ALSO REALLY WANTS TO FUCK CIRRUS. To quote @poetry-protest-pornography , he was an active and enthusiastic participant in his first blowjob and that's exactly as it should be regardless of what he's wearing or what he likes! He's a full person with a functioning libido and I'm so happy and grateful that the story isn't infantilizing him.

TL;DR, some of ya'll have got to let go of the notion that a character being/acting cute and them experiencing sexual desire are mutually exclusive.

[sokkastyles]

Just saw a post where someone took someone else's post and said that they were "projecting" onto Katara because the OP said that if they were in Katara's position when they were kissed by Aang in EIP after making it clear that she didn't want to be kissed, they wouldn't forgive Aang.

And the thing is, that first of all, projecting isn't a dirty word, it's a normal way to relate to fictional narratives. Second, we actually don't see Katara forgive Aang or even address the kiss in any way other than after she looks upset and angry and then runs out of the room. Audiences can ONLY project onto Katara because we don't actually get to see the resolution to that event from Katara's perspective. We assume she forgave him because she gets together with him in the end, but we aren't actually shown it and we know that they would be endgame whether or not the kiss had happened. Katara's forgiveness of Aang doesn't feel organic because she doesn't actually get the chance to forgive him, so of course audiences are going to question it.

Third, it's actually quite common now for writers and producers to consult audience members, especially those who fit the demographic of a character, on whether that character's actions seem plausible. This is especially true if the writers themselves aren't representatives of that demographic. Katara's actions were written by male writers, so it's not up to them to give the final word on what a teenage girl would do upon being kissed without consent, it is up to female fans to decide whether that rings true. The fact that the writers didn't even bother to show us Katara's perspective further highlights the lack of a female perspective being considered here.

The post in question also said that what Aang did didn't actually hurt Katara, and that she was just "annoyed and angry," but not hurt. And I feel like people who argue this in favor of Katara and Aang's relationship are actually downplaying the relationship quite a bit. Because if Katara loves Aang, she'd feel a whole lot more than annoyed upon being kissed by him after expressing that she was confused and felt that it wasn't the right time. She'd feel incredibly betrayed, she'd feel like he didn't listen to her. She might even question her relationship with him further and start to back away from the feelings of love that she was already hesitant to express, because what Aang is showing her is that he doesn't actually care about how she feels and isn't going to be careful with her feelings if she were to truly give her heart to him. The EIP kiss actually does A LOT of damage to Katara and Aang's relationship, and the fact that it's never actually addressed does even more damage.

I mean, if Katara didn't really care about Aang kissing her without her consent, I'm not sure why I should care about their relationship at all.

The post also brought up that Zuko has done worse to Katara but she forgave him. The thing is that we actually SAW Zuko earn Katara's forgiveness. This is a relationship I can get behind because the show cares about it. The show cares that Zuko hurt Katara and cares about whether or not he gets her forgiveness. Zuko and Katara would not have had a relationship at all without that conflict and its resolution. The show tells me that these two characters care about each other, and it does it without any sort of romantic drama AND without having the guy sexually assault her.

[starryjake]

What do you think are the top kinks for Andteam?~~~ (I'm new to your blog. I LOVE YOU FOR STUNNING ANDTEAM!~💕💕)

(a/n: this took me so long i could not think of any kinks for the life of me buttttt this is what i came up with!!)

k:

size - k is super tall and i think he would love being with someone a lot tinier than him. he likes someone he can make fun of for being short but when it comes to bed, he loves having someone that’s just easy to manhandle. he likes being able to lift you up or turn you around and just have his way with you with ease. feels a sense of pride about being so much bigger than you and likes to feel like he can protect you.

brat taming - likes to put you in your PLACE! secretly likes when you’re bratty but doesn’t show it at all, only shows how annoyed and frustrated he gets whenever you’re acting that way. he just loves to have an excuse to punish you: whether it’s edging you, overstimulating you, or if you’ve been really bad, then not letting you cum at all. he’s so cute and sweet most of the time but he can get pretty stern in bed!

begging - he’s so difficult i stg. i just know he’s gonna make you beg if you want something from him. you want him to finger you? you need to say please at least like three times. you want his cock? he basically expects you to be on your knees purely begging for him to give it to you. he just loves it so much, knowing you want him badly enough that you’re willing to beg like a pathetic little thing. and he will not hesitate to call you a pathetic little thing for needing him so bad.

more under the cut…

fuma:

breeding - like it just makes sense. he just loooooves having you in a mating press and fucking all his cum deep inside you, completely staining your insides. he’ll stay inside you for a few minutes just to ensure that his cum is doing it’s thing, and when he pulls out, he stuffs it all back inside with his fingers. he isn’t actually ready to knock you up yet, but just the idea makes him hard as a rock.

spanking - if his partner is being a brat, bro does not PLAY. he does not hold back. takes you to the nearest couch or bed and bends you ever his lap, spanking you and making you count until he feels like you’ve learned your lesson. it turns him on so fucking much feeling you writhe and shake in his lap, only to look up at him with teary eyes after and apologize for being a brat. almost always ends with him fucking the absolute shit out of you.

pet play - likes to put you in cute kitten ears or bunny ears, and collars too. likes to call you kitten and puppy and see you act all sweet and cute for him. LOVES it when you suck his dick while you’re wearing your ears, like i just know that’s the quickest way to make him bust. this way, he loves telling you what to do and you know you should do it if you want to avoid punishment (insert spanking kink).

nicholas:

• size - while k’s size kink is more in relation to the difference in height or body, nicho’s is more about his big dick lol. by that i mean he loves nothing more than to see you struggle to take his dick. it’s super hot to him the first time he’s having sex with someone and they can’t take it, but especially when he has sex with them again and they still can’t take it. like no amount of practice will ever get you accumulated to his big size.

• choking (giving) - he just looks like he likes it and like REALLY likes it. like he likes doing it hard too, wrapping his hand around your neck and actually squeezing it tight. obviously he’s not gonna squeeze it tight enough to like genuinely hurt you, but just enough to turn your face red and have you gasping for a breath. likes to do it when he’s fucking you real hard, when he just can’t control himself anymore and has to see you weak underneath him.

• marking (giving) - i just know he loves seeing you covered in hickeys. he’s careful when it comes to your neck, knowing it’s too obvious and too many people would be able to see it, which is why he opts for more private places that only he can see, like your thighs and hips and chest. you just look too perfect covered in purple bruises, each a little reminder of the sensual moment you had together.

ej:

• dirty talk - this may come as a surprise and i understand, but HEAR ME OUT! i just oddly see him as someone, when he gets in the right mood, just loves to tease you and get pretty nasty with you. just likes being a little mean to you during sex, always with a teasing grin on his face. teases you about how loud you’re moaning, about how you’re such a needy whore, how pathetic you are. i know this is a hot take but i know he has it in him!

marking (receiving) - likes marking you but LOVES when you mark him. nothing pleases him more than taking off his shirt, looking in the mirror, and seeing himself covered in purple hickeys all from you. he loves seeing the contrast of the old fading ones with the fresh ones, all scattered around his collar bones and chest. he likes when you bite him and scratch him too, anything that’s sure to leave a mark.

cum eating - he won’t force you, but he REALLY loves when you swallow his cum. if you’re sucking him off and he warns you that he’s about to finish and you keep your mouth on him, he gets SO EXCITED bc he knows you’re gonna let him cum down your throat. he has a habit of holding your head to his cock when he cums, ensuring that you get all his cum. then he’ll make you stick your tongue out once he’s done to make sure you swallowed every last drop!

yuma:

• quickies - i see him constantly having random spurts of energy that have him needing ways to get it out. as a result, he starts fucking you. these rounds only go for about five minutes but they’re just enough for him to release some of his pent up energy as well as make both you and him feel good. he also likes the slight risk factor in it because you never know when and where he’s gonna get the urge to fuck you.

• throat fucking - lives to see and hear you choke on his cock. when you give him the okay to fuck your throat, he goes for it and he goes hard. grabs you by the hair on the back of your head and just starts pounding your mouth. you’re gagging and drooling around him and practically crying, and he just loves it. especially loves it if you let him cum in your mouth and swallow it.

edging - he can lowkey be so mean during sex sometimes, and what i mean by that is he simply will not let you cum, at least not right away. he’ll get you so close, to the brink of your orgasm, and then rip it right away from you. he just loves to see how frustrated you get, sometimes to the point of tears, and how you beg with all your might to cum. normally, he eventually caves and lets you cum, but he likes to have his fun first.

jo:

• choking (receiving) - listen. he’s just so pretty and i can imagine my hand around his neck and him liking it. like the noises he would let out while you’re squeezing his pretty neck, soft little sighs and a deep moan here and there. i can see him shyly grabbing your hand and bringing it up to your neck to get you started.

• getting bossed around - idk what the actual kink name for this would be but hear me out! he just likes to let you do literally whatever you want with him and especially likes it when you’re a little mean about it. obviously don’t be TOO mean but you know…assert your dominance. likes when you declare what position you wanna be in and he just goes with it, letting you take the reigns.

• eye contact - i think at first when you initiated eye contact during sex, it made him super nervous and embarrassed, but he found that he kinda liked the way that being nervous and embarrassed felt. it just excited him more, and so whenever you grab him by the face and get him to look into your eyes, he just feels a certain way. he feels so shy and nervous, yet so close and connected to you at the same time.

[meowkunas]

walking in on you with your favourite toy !

w/ sukuna and choso (separate)

warnings/tags: implied fem! reader (bc that's how i'm thinking about it in my head rn), suggestive, 18+, no curses AU, in a relationship with choso, it's anyone's business who you are to sukuna (housemates maybe??), definitely not in a relationship with him though and you probably have to deal with him walking around shirtless all the fine and looking fine, the toy is a vibrator

a/n: thinking about them a lot recently

Sukuna is not amused. This is not his fault.

If you were going to be doing such private things, then you should lock your door.

"I can explain." You say.

Sukuna gives you a once-over. You're extremely calm for someone who's just had a ruined orgasm. The vibrator is still buzzing a little away from where you'd given up on trying to turn it off and just thrown it to the side for hopes of bringing some small sense of decency back onto your naked form. The blanket is haphazardly tossed over your legs.

It barely covers you.

You're wearing a big t-shirt and nothing else on the bottom half. He got a pretty good glimpse in your panic anyways — wet, wanting, twitching... He can't seem to get it out of his mind anymore.

An eerie acceptance settles over your face. It must be the adrenaline, Sukuna deducts.

"Okay." Sukuna says, crossing his arms and pushing the door closed behind him. "Explain."

"Well." And you have the audacity to hesitate on your words still, as though he isn't already wasting his time and attention on you. "You should knock." Pause. "Next time."

Sukuna lets out a barking laugh. "There won't be a next time, brat." He stalks over to you. It's a bit more imposing than you would imagine, especially when his eyes are scanning over your form as though he's already eating you up in his mind. He decides to toss a side-glance to your vibrator in an attempt to embarrass you further, before drawing his attention back to you.

It works, a brief flicker of panic exposing itself on your face as you seem to finally catch up to the situation.

"Just ask. But don't try to be cute about it." Sukuna continues.

"Sukuna?" You ask timidly, still trying to figure out what he's actually proposing.

"I told you not to be cute about it."

That seems to rile you up, and you feel a flash of annoyance run through you. "I'm cute about everything."

You just get to finish your sentence, before he cups your jaw dangerously tight, tilting your face to look up at him. Perhaps you weren't such a quiet and innocent housemate after all. The way your cheeks squish together is kind of cute actually.

He thinks you might look better crying.

A sound between a questioning mumble and a choke leaves your throat. You open your mouth to say something else, but his fingers are already tracing down to your collarbone. He tilts his head slightly as he feels your breath hitch.

"Lie back." Sukuna says, nudging your shoulder a little.

It's a final warning, you realise. A checkpoint in deciding whether you want to continue or not.

You do follow his instructions, jerking slightly as he manages to slide his hand onto you and press down onto your sensitive clit. His hands quickly move to keep your legs open.

He stops moving for a bit and you peek up at him to see what he's doing. The vibrator is in his hand, looking rather small and pathetic.

"We'll see how easily you cum from this, and depending on whether you impress me..." His eyes travel from your lower half up to your eyes. "I'll show you how good it'll feel to take me."

Choso is polite about it. Every kiss you've shared with him has been soft, sweet even. He's never shown any particular interest in furthering it. It's why you're so oddly embarrassed when he walks in on you with your vibrator pressed against your clit.

"Choso!" You manage to slip the vibrator out of your hands and turn it off, ignoring the urge to pull the blankets over your head.

His face reveals no surprise, nor a blush. A feeling of insecurity runs through you and a stinging starts behind your eyes. Huh.

In the silence, he's staring very intently at your closed legs. He takes a step into the room, still saying nothing.

You jump slightly when he sits beside you on the bed. He's uncertain, bordering on nervous as his fingers twitch slightly.

It's quiet enough that you think you should say something.

"Choso—" You say again, in a softer, more reassuring tone.

He cuts you off. "I'll help."

The matter-of-fact tone makes you blush. You forget how straightforward he usually is.

You shake your head. "It's fine. If you're uncomfortable with it or you're not really sure, you don't need to—"

Choso reaches under the covers from where you've thrown your vibrator. The top of it still glistens with your slick. He takes it out, twisting it in his hand as though to investigate it. He presses the button until it vibrates a bit too loudly.

It's not a setting you usually would have set it on to start with.

"Just tell me what to do." He says.

Good thing there's a lot of different settings for him to play with under your guidance.

[yamazki]

FRESH OUT OF LOVE ? — chris sturniolo

part 2 here!

★ warnings: YEARNING, cursing, angst, use of marijuana, use of alcohol, mentions of cheating, ( i give up )

note: honestly wrote this cause i'm a certified yearner, so expect nothing!

You lean against a kitchen counter at another influencer’s house, contemplating whether to get a refill or not. You’re feeling a bit tipsy, but you know it’ll wear off in ten minutes if you don’t get another punch. Before you can decide, a familiar voice cuts through the low hum of the party.

“Oh my god, look who finally decided to show up!”

You barely have time to react before Tara wraps you in a quick but firm hug. She smells like vanilla and weed, her signature scent, and when she pulls back, she studies you with a smirk. “You good?”

You hesitate. It’s not a simple question, and you both know it. “Yeah. Just needed a drink.” You gesture vaguely to the half-empty cup in your hand.

Tara hums knowingly, leaning against the counter beside you. “Mm. I feel that. But I think what you really need is outside.”

You raise a brow. “Outside?”

She tilts her head towards the backyard. “Larray and Quen are out there. I know you’ve been in your hermit era, but you should come say hi. It’s chill, just a little smoke, a little catching up.”

You bite the inside of your cheek. You hadn’t planned to stay long. Just enough to show face, maybe let yourself pretend for a second that things were normal. But the thought of stepping outside, of letting the night pull you into something mindless and warm, is tempting.

Tara nudges your arm. “Come on. You look like you could use it.”

And she’s right. You don’t say anything, just let out a small sigh before pushing off the counter. “Alright. Just for a little.”

Tara grins, linking her arm with yours as she leads you through the crowd, towards the sliding glass door.

You push past the screen door into the chilly November breeze, immediately noticing the bright moon, followed by the smell of pot. You see a circle of people hanging out by a parked black Tesla, and you smile. Ready to finally let loose.

Until you see a familiar head away from the group.

A tousled sea of chestnut waves, each strand illuminated by the moonlight. Exactly what you dream of every night.

Chris.

He’s alone, leaning on the roof of the car. You can only see so much of his side profile. He takes a hit, gazing thoughtfully into the sky, seemingly relaxed and undisturbed. You notice that he’s growing his beard, and you frown a bit, knowing he doesn’t shave when he’s sad.

Then, someone—you don’t bother to check who—slurs your name.

You’re still fixated on Chris, and you see his demeanor shift imperceptibly; his eyes flicker downward and calmly freeze. You can’t look away, locked in a silent exchange of uncertainty.

Seconds pass.

Has he heard? Will he look around?

Then time unpauses. His head turns to your direction, meeting your gaze with furrowed brows. His face shows a mixture of surprise and confusion, while his blue eyes reflect the faintest hint of moonlight. You can’t read him, but he looks so beautiful.

You remain frozen, caught in the moment. And it just feels like it’s just you two there. Your mind feels foggy, and you notice you stopped breathing. You don’t know for how long, but you quietly inhale and exhale, releasing the tension.

You turn your head to Larray and Quen, clearly already out of it, and they shout your name excitedly, inviting you to join them.

You smile and greet them as you approach.

Larray begins, “Heyyy, I missed you! I haven’t seen you in weeks, girl.” He frowns as he opens his arms for a hug.

“Yeah… we missed you a lot.” Quen acts sad and gives a side-eye, but quickly, her demeanor changes. “But aye, we got da ‘za, hahahaha, smoke up, babe.”

You laugh. “Nah. I’m good. Just wanted to show myself before I leave. Been a day.” You shrug.

Larray and Quen try to convince you to stay, but you couldn’t—not if he’s here.

“C’mon, the hoes are leavin’, and we DoorDashing Taco Bell tonight for the munchies. It’s gonna be chill.”

You can’t help but look at him. His head is down, but a second later, he looks up at you.

And you look away immediately.

“Okay. Sure,” you mutter.

The joint is passed to you, and you hesitate before taking it, bringing it to your lips. The familiar burn fills your lungs, and you exhale slowly, letting the haze settle over your mind. The laughter, the voices, the music from inside—it all fades into background noise.

Except for him.

You can feel his presence like a weight against your chest. He hasn’t moved from his spot, but you know he’s watching.

Quen nudges you. “So, how you been?” She asks it casually, but there’s something beneath it. Something careful.

You glance at her, then at Tara, who’s watching you just as closely. They know. Of course, they know.

“I’m good,” you say, too quickly. The weed hasn’t hit enough to make you honest yet. “Been busy.”

Tara scoffs. “Busy avoiding us.”

Larray hums in agreement, taking another hit. “We get it, though. That whole thing was…” He waves a hand, searching for the word.

Quen finds it for him. “Messy.”

You swallow, suddenly aware of how dry your mouth is. You should’ve grabbed another drink.

“I don’t really wanna talk about it,” you say, voice quieter now.

Tara nudges your knee with hers. “We get it. But, like… you know he didn’t actually cheat, right?”

Your heart stutters.

You don’t respond.

Larray exhales a slow puff of smoke. “I mean, yeah, it looked bad, but…” He shrugs. “He didn’t do anything.”

You clench your jaw. “He almost did.”

Tara sighs. “Almost isn’t the same as doing it. You guys were in a shitty situation, all couples go through it. That wannabe–singer just took advantage of it—of him.”

You shake your head, your chest tightening. “It doesn’t matter. He still stayed in that room and he—”

Your words die in your throat because Chris is standing now.

Moving.

Walking toward you.

You freeze, eyes locking onto his as he stops a few feet away. The conversation around you dissolves. It’s just him. Just you.

“Can we talk?” His voice is quiet, rough.

And then it hits you—his scent. A mix of expensive cologne, clean laundry, and something distinctly him. It’s familiar, painfully so. It’s the scent that used to linger on your clothes after long nights together, the one that clung to your pillows after he left. You used to bury your face in his hoodie just to breathe it in.

Your heart flutters, just like it always used to. And you hate it.

You exhale, staring at him, searching for something—anything—that will make this easier. But all you see is him, looking at you like you’re the only thing that matters.

Like you always have been. And you hate that it still makes your heart ache.

You should say no. You should turn around, go back to Larray and Quen, pretend none of this is happening. But you don’t.

Instead, you nod. Barely.

Chris notices anyway.

He takes a step back, waiting for you to follow. And despite every voice in your head screaming at you to stop, to not give him this, your feet move on their own.

You follow him, past the Tesla, past the glow of the backyard lights, until you’re standing in the dim shadows near the fence. Far enough that no one can hear.

For a second, neither of you speak. The only sounds are the muffled bass of the party inside and the occasional burst of laughter from the group near the car.

Chris shoves his hands into the pockets of his hoodie. He looks at you like he doesn’t know where to start.

You cross your arms, bracing yourself. “What do you want, Chris?”

He exhales sharply, like he expected you to sound angry but still hoped you wouldn’t be.

“I just… I just need you to know,” he says, voice low, hesitant. “I didn’t do it. I swear to God, I—”

Your stomach twists. “Chris.”

“I know what it looked like.” He steps closer, his voice almost desperate now. “But I didn’t touch her. I didn’t kiss her. I wouldn’t—”

“But you almost did.” The words slip out before you can stop them, your voice barely above a whisper.

Chris flinches, his brows knitting together. “I—” He stops, swallows hard. “I was drunk. I was stupid. And I fucked up, but not like that. Not in the way you think.”

You shake your head, looking away. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Yes, it does.” His voice is firm now. “Because I can’t stand the thought of you believing that I wanted anyone else. That I ever could.”

His words make your chest tighten. You feel like you can’t breathe. Because this is exactly what you didn’t want—to hear him say things that make you want to believe him.

You close your eyes, inhaling slowly. His scent is still there, surrounding you, pulling you back into a place you swore you wouldn’t go.

When you open them again, you don’t try to keep the hurt from your voice.

“You know what I went through with…” You hesitate, but Chris already knows. His jaw clenches.

“You know. So you know how much this just brings me back, okay?” Your voice cracks, and you hate it, but you keep going. “Do you have any idea what it felt like to even think—for a second—that you could do the same thing to me?”

Chris exhales sharply through his nose, shaking his head as he runs a hand through his hair. His whole body is tense, and when he looks at you, his eyes are burning.

“I’m not him,” he says, his voice hard and unyielding. “I’m not some stupid artist that fucks around and cheats like it’s in his contract.”

His words hang heavy in the air. You don’t say anything, just look at him, waiting.

Then, his anger cracks. His expression shifts into something else—something raw and tired.

“I miss you,” he says, quieter now. “I hate not talking to you.”

You inhale sharply, pressing your lips together, but he keeps going.

“Everywhere I go, I just—I don’t know. It doesn’t feel right.” He exhales, shaking his head. “I keep thinking I’ll turn around and you’ll be there. Like you always were.”

His voice is rough, a little unsteady. He looks down, exhaling through his nose before meeting your gaze again.

“I don’t know what to do with it,” he admits. “With missing you.”

The words settle between you, thick in the cold air.

[electrofolk]

A genderqueer reading of Coffee Prince

I wanted to examine why I keep coming back to a show I first watched 12 years ago and why it seemed to mean so much to me. I think it's because I saw in this show an extremely raw portrayal of the struggles I have felt as a genderqueer person, which is wild for a Korean show from 2007. While I rewatched, it was so clear to me that Eun Chan is genderqueer and many of her struggles are not only about her relationship with the love interest, but her relationship with her own gender.

A brief synopsis: Eun Chan is mistaken for a man, and ends up going along with it and getting a job under these pretenses in coffee shop. She ends up falling in love with her boss, Han Gyul, who still thinks she is a man. Han Gyul is also falling in love, but really struggles with the fact that this would make him gay. He eventually decides he is willing to face homophobia to be with Eun Chan. She then decides to reveal to him the truth, but it is Eun Chan’s struggle with having to confess this which feels so familiar and painful to a genderqueer person.

Eun chan has forgotten shes in a lie, she is not in disguise like other gender bending shows, she is just being herself, wearing what she wants to wear, acting how she wants to act It is others who place her in a binary, and assume she is a man. She says right out, “I'm not a guy nor a girl", and she is terrified of what that means.

So when Han Gyul says “Whether you’re a man or an alien, I don’t care anymore”, how can she not run with that? All she is feeling in that moment is relief, you can see it in the way she hugs him.

She does feel like an alien, that much is clear from how she describes herself, and the soundtrack brilliantly confirms this – “I feel like an alien, not part of the human race...it should be such a simple thing” (Alien, by Arco). This song plays when both of them are in the car together, it could refer to Han Gyul, coming to terms with being attracted to who he thinks is a man, or to Eun Chan, who feels she exists outside of the binary.

When Han Gyul finally asks her if she really is a woman, she is reluctant to answer. Some might interpret this hesitation as fear of his anger, but it could also be that she doesn’t want to admit to and be punished for something she doesn’t even feel to be true. He has to ask multiple times because she doesn’t answer, and finally she only slightly nods her head, looking sad and scared.

Later, he begs her to say its not true, that she isn’t a woman. Again, she cant answer to confirm or deny, all she can say is “I’m sorry”, and she breaks down. He is so angry at her for being something she doesn’t even feel herself to be. He said he’d love her if she was a man or alien, but he doesn’t want her to be a woman. The one thing she never felt like she was she’s now being punished for.

When Han Gyul finally comes around and says he’s actually glad she’s a girl, her face says it all.

There are many more hints that she doesn’t feel that she conforms to femininity. She said right from the beginning, that he would never like “someone like me”, showing she had a preexisting view of herself before she ever got involved in this whole thing.

You can see she has internalized this failure to conform, saying its her fault for looking the way she does. She is not shocked when his grandmother called her a thing, She has become used to being treated poorly as she has not conformed her whole life. But Han Gyul gets angry having to grapple for this first time with non-conformity.

Although Han Gyul has a lot of issues, he does have to get some credit for eventually coming out of the woman-man binary thinking he fell into earlier. He realizes she was born this way, and when he shops for a ring for her, he tells the shopkeeper “she is not feminine” and buys her a simple band.

One final thing I’ll mention is the music choice, again. The song that keeps returning at different points is a beautifully sad song with the lyrics “And now I’ve travelled across the ocean, with the same shoes, just longer hair”. At the end she does come back from overseas with longer hair, making her seem more feminine. But she remains the same, and you have to hope Han Gyul realizes she is still the same person, existing outside of a binary, and he is at peace with that.

[lottiesliterature]

Summary:Javier Peña is injured during a mission, and you’re forced to take care of him while stuck in a small, one-bedroom cabin.

Warnings: 18+, mdni, injury (bullet wound), one bed, close proximity. Pedro Pascal

Wc: 1,340

The mission had gone south quickly.

It had started like any other operation—precision, stealth, and quick thinking. But things escalated when Javier was shot. It wasn’t a serious wound, thank God, just a graze across his side that was bleeding more than it should, and that’s how you found yourself in the remote cabin, tending to his injury in the middle of nowhere.

I'm fine,” he muttered, slumping against the wall as you wiped away the blood with a disinfectant soaked cloth. His eyes never left the floor, and his jaw clenched in that stubborn way you knew all too well.

You shot him a skeptical look. “If you're fine, then why do you look like you're about to pass out?” He didn’t answer. Of course, he didn’t. Javier Peña was a man who hated showing vulnerability, even if he was the one who’d just been shot. His pride always came before everything else, including the reality of his injuries.

The tension in the room was suffocating, the kind that came from two people who knew each other too well and not well enough all at once.

His eyes flicked to yours, dark and unreadable. “I said I’m fine. You don’t need to—”.

“Don’t,” you cut him off, sitting back on your heels and glaring at him. “Don’t do that thing where you pretend you’re invincible. It’s not working.”

The room fell silent except for the sound of your ragged breathing and the storm rattling the windowpane. His dark eyes flicked up to meet yours, and the intensity in them made your heart skip.

“You don’t have to do this,” he said quietly, his voice softer now but still edged with that irritating stubbornness.

You froze for a split second, your hand hovering over his side. The heat of his skin beneath your fingers burned like a warning, but you ignored it. “Yes, I do.”

“Why?” The word was barely a whisper, but it hit you like a punch to the gut.

Your fingers tightened around the cloth, and you tore your gaze away from his, focusing instead on the blood staining your hands. “Because you’d do the same for me,” you said, your voice low but firm.

Javier’s silence was deafening, and it made the air between you feel heavier.

When you finally looked up, his face was inches from yours, his expression unreadable but undeniably vulnerable. The proximity sent a jolt through your body, but you couldn’t afford to get distracted—not now.

“Lift your arm,” you said, your voice trembling just slightly.

He hesitated, his eyes never leaving yours, and for a moment you thought he might argue. But then he exhaled sharply and did as you asked, wincing as the motion pulled at the torn skin. You didn’t miss the way his hand brushed against your side, whether accidental or deliberate, and it sent a wave of heat straight to your chest.

You worked in silence, your hands steady despite the whirlwind of emotions threatening to overwhelm you. Every time your fingers grazed his skin, you felt him tense beneath your touch. The closeness was unbearable, every movement drawing you closer to an invisible line neither of you seemed ready to cross.

“Doesn’t hurt,” he said gruffly, breaking the silence.

“Liar,” you muttered, refusing to meet his eyes.

A low chuckle escaped him, though it was tinged with pain. “You always this bossy?”

You glared at him, your temper flaring. “Only when my partner gets himself shot and refuses to take it seriously.”

For a long moment, neither of you spoke. You finished cleaning the wound, your hands lingering on his side longer than necessary. When you finally looked up, the raw emotion in his gaze made your breath hitch.

Finally, you broke eye contact, your voice shaky as you muttered, “You should lie down. You’ve lost a lot of blood.”

“I’m fine,” he said, the gruffness in his tone not enough to mask the exhaustion bleeding through.

“You’re not fine, Javier,” you snapped, standing up abruptly and pacing to the other side of the small room. The tension in your chest was unbearable, a knot that refused to unravel. You gestured to the single bed pushed against the wall, your frustration bubbling over. “Just take the bed before you pass out.”

He shot you a look, one brow raised, the kind that usually made people stop arguing. But you weren’t most people.

“You’ve lost blood, and you’re hurt,” you added before he could argue. “You need it more than I do.”

“You’re exhausted,” he countered, his voice rough but firm. “You think I don’t notice how you’ve been running on fumes?”

You ignored him, grabbing the blanket you’d pulled off the bed and laying it down on the floorboards. The room was small, cold, and lit only by the flickering yellow glow of the bedside lamp. But you didn’t care. Anything was better than sharing that bed and having to endure the unbearable tension lingering in the air between you.

“I’m not arguing with you about this,” you said, lying down on your makeshift bed. You turned your back to him, pulling your coat over yourself for extra warmth.

He let out a frustrated sigh, but he didn’t say anything else. The sound of him settling onto the bed filled the silence, followed by the creak of the old mattress.

You tried to sleep, but the floor was unforgivingly hard, and the chill seeped into your bones despite your coat and the thin blanket. Every time you shifted, the bruises and tension from the day’s events flared to life, keeping sleep just out of reach.

Eventually, though, exhaustion won out, and you drifted off.

Javier lay awake on the bed, staring at the ceiling. The room was quiet except for your soft, uneven breathing, a clear sign that you weren’t resting peacefully.

He sighed, running a hand over his face. Stubborn. That’s what you were. Stubborn and self-sacrificing, always putting him first even when you didn’t need to. It made his chest ache, though he’d never admit it out loud.

When your breathing finally evened out, he swung his legs over the edge of the bed with a groan, standing up carefully to avoid pulling at the stitches in his side. The sight of you curled up on the floor made him frown. You looked so small, so vulnerable, and the thought of you spending the night like that stirred something deep inside him.

“Damn it,” he muttered under his breath.

He crouched down beside you, moving slowly to avoid waking you. His hands hovered for a moment, hesitant, before slipping beneath you—one under your knees and the other supporting your back. You stirred slightly, letting out a soft murmur, but didn’t wake as he lifted you effortlessly.

“You’re impossible,” he muttered softly, more to himself than to you, as he carried you to the bed.

The mattress creaked as he laid you down gently, pulling the blanket up over you. He hesitated for a moment, his hand lingering on the edge of the blanket as he looked at your face, now peaceful in sleep.

Shaking his head, he moved to sit back on the floor, resigned to a sleepless night. But before he could settle, your hand reached out, catching his wrist.

“Stay,” you mumbled, your voice thick with sleep.

He froze, his breath hitching as he looked down at you. Your eyes were barely open, your grip on his wrist loose, but the vulnerability in your voice was enough to shatter the walls he’d so carefully built.

After a long moment, he exhaled and climbed into the bed beside you, careful to keep some distance. The mattress was small, and the proximity was impossible to ignore, but he stayed still, watching as your breathing evened out again.

“Stubborn,” he whispered one last time, a faint smile tugging at his lips.

And for the first time in a long time, Javier Peña allowed himself to relax, the weight of the day melting away as the quiet rhythm of your presence lulled him to sleep.

[beldamtarot]

‎ -ˏˋ MASTERLIST ˊˎ-

DISCLAIMER: take what resonates, leave what doesn't. Not everything here will resonate nor will be accurate to your situation, as this is a collective reading. For more accurate and longer readings, you may book a reading with me! And if you simply want to support me, you may tip me here.

If you struggle in choosing between these piles, you may choose more than one if you feel connected to them!

‎✧ ─── PILE ONE !

Before we continue, let's check your and your person's energies first. If it resonates, you may continue to read about how they feel about you. This ensures that the reading is really for you.

Your current energy: You're in your feminine energy right now. You're being this nurturing, caring, and loving person who provides stability and safety for someone, or at least you try to be. But you're not content with what you have right now. I feel like you're in a place where happiness does not exist and it's just full of negativity. I can see that you're trying to walk away from this place or you already have. You want to have a new start in your life but you feel stuck and you have no idea how you would actually start. But I'm seeing that you will find a better place where stability and comfort exist. This is where you'll truly be happy.

Your person's current energy: I can see that your person is intuitive. If not, then they're an empath. They can feel your emotions and they just understand you easily. Your person feels connected to you on a deeper level and I feel like you feel that way towards them too. It feels as though no one else can understand you other than them. Your person is in a happy place right now and I feel like you make them happy as well. They know that you're in a rough place right now and they want to help you get through it. They want to be with you even during your worst days. This person thinks that this connection is a dream come true. I also feel like this person is vocal when they're around you but they show this mask where they're just a chill person.

How they feel about you: Your person has a lot of mixed feelings toward you. They really find you attractive physically and they could even be lustful towards you, but because they know they feel this way, they don't know if they have feelings deeper than that. They want to get to know you better and they're willing to be in this strong masculine energy for you. They want to cater you and provide for you especially when it comes to finances. This person has a lot of feelings to the point that it gets confusing and as much as they have the urge to provide for you and be in their masculine energy, they don't know whether they should because they're not sure about their feelings that much yet. They're probably going through an awakening right now, though. And they're trying to figure things out first before making their move towards you.

Signs: Fire signs (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius), Capricorn, Virgo

MBTI: ESTJ, ENTJ, ISTJ, INTJ, ESFP, ESFJ, ISFJ

Other signs: School/university. Literature. Economics. Finance. 6'0". Red hair. Blue eyes. STEM. Not religious. Gym. Camping. Hiking.

‎‎✧ ─── PILE TWO !

Before we continue, let's check your and your person's energies first. If it resonates, you may continue to read about how they feel about you. This ensures that the reading is really for you.

Your current energy: Most of you went through a rough breakup and this heartbreak makes you not believe in love anymore. You don't want to open your heart to other people anymore but deep down inside you, you still have hopes in love. You could have someone in your life already who might be pursuing you or proving themselves to you and as much as you want to give them a chance and accept what they have to offer, you're hesitating. You don't know if you should because of the heartbreak you've been through. You're still in the state of finding stability in life. Finding that stability and comfort within you, with yourself, and within your environment alone.

Your person's current energy: Your person is being patient towards you. They're willing to wait for you to heal and be ready to commit again. They're willing to wait until you want to enter a relationship again and feel safe. They could be dealing with their finances right now though. There might be some financial loss in their life that they need to work on. But they're willing to move things forward if you'll let them to. They're looking towards having a good future with you and start a new beginning with you. I feel like you already know them, and if that's the case, they want to make this connection deeper.

How they feel about you: There's a huge shift in the energies here. Your person has really high hopes between you two and for your future in this connection together. But you might have hurt this person already. They feel heartbroken towards you but they act like they're okay and their feelings don't matter much. But they do. They feel their emotions deeply. When you hurt them, they might have gone through some unhealthy habits as their coping mechanism. They could've been drinking alcohol or staying up late to distract themselves. They're changing a lot now and their feelings for you could be changing as well. They feel chaotic towards you because of how hurt they are right now. And as of right now, they're just trying to keep their feelings to themselves despite the urge to pursue you and this connection with you.

Signs: Scorpio, Pisces, Leo, Aquarius, Gemini

MBTI: INFP, ISFP, ISFJ, INFJ

Other signs: hopeless romantic. Playing video games. Late nights. Sleeping at 3AM-6AM. Alcohol. Binge-watching Netflix series. The series You.

‎✧ ─── PILE THREE !

Before we continue, let's check your and your person's energies first. If it resonates, you may continue to read about how they feel about you. This ensures that the reading is really for you.

Your current energy: You know you're in control of your life. Whether you need to make a decision in life, you shouldn't let other people control you or dictate what you should do. You could still act like a child sometimes but this is because you're naturally a passionate person. There's a lot of passion going inside you especially when it comes to your interests. You could be an artist or a writer. You're a hardworking person and you're willing to do anything to reach your goals and dreams. But right now, you might be feeling a bit stuck about a certain situation. Perhaps what you're going to pursue in college. You don't know whether you should choose a practical field or stick with your passion. But I'm seeing that you're walking away from something here. It could be your family, who doesn't want to accept what you want to be in the future. But it could also be what you've built in your life for yourself because you realized that this is not going to work in the long run.

Your person's current energy: They're a hardworking person too, just like you. You could have similar traits with this person, maybe a lot to the point that it's uncanny. This person has love for you already or maybe you have love for them or both. They're in their masculine energy right now. They could be financially stable and they're the type of person who would want to provide for their partner and wouldn't let their partner spend a thing, not even a cent. They're a committed person, it's like casual relationships or flings aren't their thing. It's either all or nothing. They're appreciative and they appreciate everything, even the little things.

How they feel about you: They have some big feelings for you here. They want to commit to you but they're taking so long. They still want to get to know you better and learn your deepest scars. They really have big feelings, they feel their feelings a lot, and it can be difficult for them to take in. Because of this, they're holding back. They feel chaotic when they're alone and apart from you. I feel like they're intuitive around you. They know what you're feeling in certain situations at certain times. It's like they don't even have to ask to know what you're feeling because they have it all figured out. And they're just there with you, calm and doing their best to give you comfort. They could be holding your hand and doing the thumb thing to let you know that they're there for you and you have nothing to worry because all will be well. They want to give you everything they can, especially stability emotionally, mentally, and financially. They could even have their own place and a stable job or source of income right now. They're just looking for the right time and waiting for you to be vulnerable around them, which is the right time for them.

Signs: Cancer, Virgo, Taurus, Libra

MBTI: ISFP, ENTP, INFJ, ENFJ, ISTP

Other signs: artist. Poetry. The movie/book Pride and Prejudice. UAE. Europe. Arab. Twin flames.

[cogniizaant]

hello hi I love your writing🔥🔥🔥🔥 you should write some more Froggy stuff, like possibly with an affectionate reader? /nf

THANK YOU SO MUCH ANON i'm very flattered and i'm so glad you requested. and im also sorry i saw this a bit late i hadn't checked my laptop when i had left work yesterday. anywho enough about me i would be happy to write more stuff about Froggy. these will also be headcanons kinda so i hope you're cool with it.

i ran out of related banners so quick.

Froggy x Affectionate!reader HCS.

It's definitely shocking for him at first and you might have to ease him into it. I wouldn't say he'd be unfamiliar with affection or anything, but rather just used to more toned down expressions of it. SO, if you're the type to go all out with declaring your love for him, do be prepared for his initial reaction to be a bit more timid.

He'd never fully get used to it. It'll be that one thing about dating you that he can never fully get accustomed too. One minute you guys are talking, having a casual conversation and then you just out of nowhere turn to him, hugging him until your faces are pressed against each others as you remind him again for the umpteenth time that day that you love him. He'd shiver a bit, but struggle to fight back a smile as he pats the arm wrapped around him. He actually really likes hearing despite how hesitant he is to say it back. It's not that he doesn't feel the same, because he does. He's just too embarrassed to say it back. He's also a bit embarrassed of how easily you can get to him. He's obviously not the calmest guy ever and he's relatively outspoken with his feelings, but it's for him to get this giddy over another person is crazy to him. None of his past relationships were like this at all. He's the type to say he's a 'grown ass man' whenever warranted but has to cover his face and stop himself from giggling and kicking his feet whenever you're with him.

On any special holidays, he's learned to brace himself and be prepared to wake up to enough gifts to cover every birthday for the rest of his life and then some, or an expertly planned date for the two of you that you've curated every aspect of since the year prior. He might think it's a bit too much at times or complain that he won't be able to get him anything of equal value. If you respond in anyway saying he doesn't need too and that you're doing this strictly because you love him and you want too, then he might call you corny. He doesn't mean it at all, it's just to distract you from the fact that he's super flustered over it.

On the topic of gifts, whenever he gives you anything he's finally accepted the fact that you will have the most over the top reaction ever. He's gotten tackled and smothered with kisses enough times to know there's no curbing your excitement. He's honestly grown to enjoy it, and even anticipate it. I think he'd be pretty attentive and would do his best to remember what you like so he can get something aligned with your interests with you. He feels proud that he's able to make you happy even though he still feels that his gifting abilities are subpar in comparison to yours.

"Hey, it's nothing. Really. I just remembered you said you liked that show." "Froggy, I love it so much. I've never been gifted anything this great before ever in my life. I swear I'm going to craft a ring with my bare hands and propose to you with it one of these days." "How am I supposed to respond to that?!"

A lot of your conversations go like that. You're so insanely nice and loving towards him it genuinely throws him off so much. The gears in his brain stop turning every time and he has to manually restart them. He enjoys it a lot, but questions himself often on whether he's built to handle this. You're able to say how you feel to him so clearly and consistently and he can barely respond back without blushing and stuttering. You make him really nervous, but in a good way. You could have been dating for decades, now. Married, even. He'll still get flustered over you being affectionate with him either way. It's like a never ending crush on you.

He's very wary about letting you meet his colleagues. You all would probably get along very well, so that is not his concern. He can't let anyone see him in that state. Well, with the exception of you, of course. I mean, how can he retain his authority then? In reality, none of them would say much about it, though it would be a shocking sight. You cannot convince him of that, though.

Overall, Froggy will never be unsure about your love for him, so good job on that. He loves you back. He's just working up the courage to say it with a straight face.

[spacegyaru]

cw: very toxic shidou! also, i'm having a baby fever rn after meeting my bf's nieces sooo. also, they're both 23 here!

toxic! shidou ryusei is the type to make you beg no matter what the circumstances are. whether it's in and out of the bed, if he has the chance to be a menace, he totally would be.

you remember staring back at the two lines that your pregnancy test kits left three weeks after officially breaking up with him. you cursed at yourself upon seeing it.

"ugh fuck," you whispered to yourself, after looking at the white stick you just used. you discovered that you were officially pregnant with your ex-boyfriend, ryusei shidou's baby.

well, the circumstances of the breakup weren't exactly ideal. you loved shidou dearly, but he started becoming a little bit toxic. it all started when you asked to break up with him for the sake of your career, but he refused to— you ended up having make up sex until you forgot about breaking up. after that, whenever you guys start having an argument, he brings up the fact that you almost broke up with him, even to the point of accusing you for cheating— but he wasn't agressive. it was more of a taunt to you, given his smug personality.

eventually, you got sick of it and broke up with him. now, you're in your bathroom, thinking whether you should tell him or not. you sigh, setting down the three tests, and taking a photo of them.

if you're going to be honest, you'd love to have kids— babies to be exact. but you're not sure about who their dad would be. also, you're not sure if your menacing ex would be the ideal man for that. besides, you're broke right now... which means, you'll be needing his help.

so with a little bit of hesitation, you texted him after deleting his contact, and not talking for the past two weeks, sending him a photo of those three tests.

this is the first time he left you on read, and it made your blood boil. you were so mad.

after that, you tossed your phone on the bed. why were you hoping for a good response from shidou anyway? that's like waiting for a shooting star.

until the next night...

you couldn't stop your blood from boiling upon reading this. so you devised a plan to confront. the next day, you were angrily storming in to the sports arena, after his football practice. there's not a lot of people during that hour and he's usually the last person to leave. you entered the locker room, where you met him, with his towel hanging low from his hips. he smirked upon seeing you with an angry expression while approaching him.

"yo y/n—" shidou tried to greet you, but your palm came across his cheek. you slapped him with full of anger.

"you have the guts to greet me with a 'yo' when i just told you that i'm pregnant and you literally ignored me?!" you almost caused a scandal in the locker room, but it's a good thing that there's only the two of you in the whole place.

you thought shidou would argue back, but he didn't. he smirked, ignored you, and just got dressed. all while you waited for his answer. this is shidou's usual trick to provoke you. he's going to be quiet and wear a smug expression, until you get so angry... and eventually, you're gonna find yourself calming down.

"r-ryusei— hey, d-don't ignore me! hey!" you tried chasing him as he almost left while carrying his sports duffel bag, but you blocked his way, almost doing a t-pose. and he laughed upon you doing this. you got so embarrassed and flustered by his reaction.

"you're so funny, y/n." shidou said in a smug voice, "if you want my help, you gotta at least be nice to me, you know? you'll need to take me back to your life.~"

oh hell nah, shidou knows a lot. he knows that child was made by you and him. but of course... he won't give you what you want. not until you beg for it. not until you show him how dependent you are to him.

shidou didn't expect you to give in so fast though. but you had swallow your pride. you badly need his help.

"i-i— don't leave me alone, ryusei. this is your child too. i—" you were having a hard time blocking his way and he's surely having fun watching you chase him like this. "f-fine, i'll play nice and do whatever you want!"

again, for the third time, shidou managed to make himself crawl back in your life again. you could never get rid of this man.

[ilysungho]

heyy! just had a thought and this could apply to any member cuz I can't think of just one...

you and him are roommates! after a few months, both of you eventually get so close with each other to the point it's comfortable to talk about... odd stuff. you'd end up asking him what he does to masturbate, and he'd answer you with a shrug. after a few seconds of silence from his end, he'd overshare and says he uses a homemade fleshlight, using items he's found laying around. you get stunned and laugh in disbelief, but you can't really judge him for that (you think whatever he does is hot 😊).

you've found him very attractive from the start and always had the intention of hooking up with him, yet never got the chance to. you'd then offer to buy him an expensive fleshlight just because you felt like it. he'd get a little surprise but he'd say it would feel unfair since he thinks you'd get nothing out of it. little does he know you want him to show you how he uses that expensive fleshlight in front of you, in his room specifically.

help, it kinda feels like i've been sending too much asks recently idk (⁠⇀⁠‸⁠↼⁠‶) i hope it's not overwhelming for you 🙏

- 🎐

nonnie i love you and i love this ask… i can definitely see this with jaehyun or riwoo the strongest! idek how to continue this thought. i feel like the only proper way to do so would be by writing a full fic, but i have a lot of fics being written rn so i'm just gonna leave some more thoughts... i got some help for jaehyun from my friend so thank you to them <3

jaehyun

he would definitely be the type to masturbate using what he has lying around. he's thought a LOT about going out to go and buy a proper fleshlight, but he's so embarrassed about it all. what will the people at the store think about him buying one? what if he orders online and you open his package to see that? he's just scared to be perceived like that, a total 180 to his usual cute and innocent looking face under his black thick rimmed glasses. but despite that, he sounds so pretty when he does anything, and you've heard him because of how loud he is! he tries to keep it down but the walls are thinner than he thinks they are, and he can't hear when you're back from wherever you'd have gone to. well, when you bring up buying him one, he would be very hesitant to let you do so. he'd be so very thankful for not having to hunt for his toy of choice at the moment, but it'd be a huge favor too.

after you get it for him though, knocks on his door before he can try it out makes him feel impatient. he just wants to be able to use his new toy, but you had to come in right at that moment! he'd sound frustrated while trying to talk to you, and you notice his urgency. one hand would push him back to sit on the edge of the bed as the other grabs your purchase to hand to him. jaehyun's head would feel dizzy as you tell him what to do, yet he let you instruct him as you wish. as he listens to you, he feels like he could cum barely a minute in. maybe it's the fact that he's using a new toy, or maybe it's your sweet voice dictating his actions. all he knows is that he needs more of it.

riwoo

riwoo would be amused to say the least. hearing you say that you'd buy something for him despite only recently starting to talk about more sexual topics would have him wondering whether you are being nice or just wanting to find your way into his pants (which you were). he'd be by your side as you pull up a website to buy it for him like you offered, and he would have him fun with it. as you scroll through, he'd talk about the specifics of what he's looking for, because if he's getting a toy after not having one, it should something he likes to say the least. you'd point to one as he says no and why he said no. he'd describe his denial with extreme detail as he watches you shift at your seat. he knows what he's doing and would take full advantage of the situation.

when it arrives, he would take the longest to open it, practically waiting for you to yell at him to open it so he could tease you for being impatient. you'd be sitting on his bed to see him open up the toy and show you it, and you just sit there watching him as he examines it. his hands would be all over it, and he stares right into your eyes while inserting his fingers into the hole. your blushing face would show through your hands barely covering your face, and he would knee your arousal while sitting on between your legs. "you wanted to watch how i use it right? stop covering your face then, darling."

[gunsatthaphan]

.₊ ⟡ ݁ 🏆 2024 Top 10 🏆 ⟡ ݁₊ .

hello! I got tagged by a few people for various kinds of tier-list-posts for this year, so instead of making separate posts that will probably end up being repetitive, I decided to combine them all into one Top 10 list of my personal favorites in 2024. My watchlist was not very lengthy this year, partly because I was busy with work and partly because the quality of many shows was not to my liking. I started a bunch of things and dropped them shortly after, which also included more widely popular ones, for which I did not share the general public opinion. In the course of that, I have become more hesitant to share my thoughts online, as with every mildly critical POV came a number of anonymous people breathing down my neck. Which isn't new for me but by the end of the year I have gotten tired and was debating whether or not I should make this post but then I decided that this is my blog and idgaf about butthurt anons lol. I'm trying to carry this mindset into the new year.

So here is my Top 10 of BL/GLs that I have started and finished this year. A very special shoutout goes to The Heart Killers which owns my ass 100% and I totally would have added it but since we're only on ep6, I feel like it wouldn't be fair to include it in this list - also because I sort of consider it a category of its own lol.

I had no trouble picking this as my number one, simply because it's an outstanding production with an S-tier cast and a very powerful and well executed script. I've always loved Up but Poom took the cake for me in this, I was absolutely starstruck by him and his screen presence, he's a big surprise for me and has become one of my personal favorites this year in terms of acting. I could fill books with reasons why I love this show.

I had to include this even though it's not finished but I'm really blown away by it. The GLs I previously watched were okay but did not strike me quite as much as this one. I knew I would love Film and Namtan together from the moment they got paired as they're both insanely skilled and I was not disappointed. They understand the assignment 100% and so does Snap25 and it really shows. I'm obsessed.

Speaking of masterpieces, this is another one. It didn't get much attention sadly, mostly because TayNew did not deliver the dynamic the general BL population was hoping for. Their loss. This is an amazing production from start to finish, the 4 of them are the best possible casting choice for their characters, the found family trope is one of the best I've seen and especially TayNew delivered another gem with this one. I shall never doubt them again. This is how you do bromance. Certain other shows could never. send tweet.

Ah yes. No year goes by without the obligatory Mame guilty pleasure lol. What can I say. FortPeat as annoying southern scuba boy meets snobby whiny writer on a beach. How can I look away. I genuinely enjoyed this, it feels like the story was written for them, it's a perfect fit for them and their range I think plus I'm glad that Aya finally found a GL partner that matches her energy lol. I loved both couples and even though the plot did lack sometimes, you can count on MMY to serve S-tier chemistry no matter what. A+.

This is my personal hidden little gem, a small production with not a ton of attention, let alone good reviews but sometimes those are the best ones. The beginning was a bit slow but it quickly picked up. I decided to give it a watch mostly because I was curious about Charles' followup bl role and ended up getting very attached lol. So much softness and deep emotions and mutual healing that happened here and that I appreciated a lot. This was also my first Taiwanese BL in I think 3 years(?) I loved it.

I was very excited to watch this and see what Change 2561 came up with after Pit Babe and even though I'm not the biggest fan of cooking plots, I ended up enjoying this a lot! I've been a SailubPon and GarfieldBenz connoisseur since Pit Babe and it was so nice to see them in the spotlight in this. I saw a bunch of people drop it because they found Plawan annoying but I disagree lol. I had a very good time.

I initially tuned into this for Seng and Best, just to see what they're up to these days and it ended with me eating the whole thing up lol. The unapologetic approach to topics like sex education mixed with the sweet love stories that came with it is one of the things I appreciated + enjoyed a lot. I was a big fan of Peak and Thanwa and would definitely watch another show with Seng and Best as I really love their dynamic. Latte and Almond had a good start but fell a bit flat towards the end. Still a very deserving 7th place for me.

I was sooo excited for this and overall it did not disappoint, though I think it could have been better in some aspects. The comprehensive vibe was juvenile but not in a bad way. I anticipated gmmtv would choose a trope-y plot for their first GL to test the waters and it seems they succeeded. The main reason I put it as number 8 is the AylinLuna side story which I very strongly disliked for multiple reasons I won't get into here. But MilkLove did a fantastic job and this was a very nice debut for them. Thumbs up!

This might be the most unexpected gem for me this year. I started watching it because I was bored and nothing else was on and I was curious to see Dunk in his first solo gig. Surprisingly he did a big leap forward with his acting in this and White was by far my favorite character. Lune on the other hand was my least favorite which was another surprise as I previously loved Phuwin as Peem in We Are so I'm not sure why Lune was so unlikable. But anyway this was a very nice combination of different cute little stories, LuneStar were very trope-y but White saved a great deal of it by being the third wheel lol, plus the BL sideplot was pure sugar. I'm sad we won't see Ryu and Java together again and I resent them not giving us that well deserved WhiteIvy endgame but overall I enjoyed this a lot!

Never thought I would put a Siwaj production in my Top 10 but I'm tired of pretending I didn't secretly love this lmao. So much chaos but so much fun. It's a typical ensemble show, mostly aimed at a domestic audience with lots of slapstick and horseplay comedy, but I ended up being quite fond of all the couples. The main crystallization for me was that this is PondPhuwin's territory, this is the type of show they belong in imo. They excel at this kind of comedy and they seemed very careless and joyful in this, which I enjoyed and which made them a decent main couple. The QToey plot was a bit draggy and even though it's a big cast, 16 episodes were not necessary, which is why it gets the 10th place. But overall it still deserves to be in this list.

Thanks again to everyone who tagged me; in this and other things over the year, I appreciate you thinking of me!! 🥺🧡 I didn't manage to reply to every tag but know that I see them all and I try to do as many as possible! Also a big thank you and much love to all the lovely people I talked to this year, especially @lattexalmond, @mayalunas @bl-recs-and-reviews and @my-wandering-rabbit, I love and cherish each one of you! 🧡 Happy New Year to everyone who read this far, here's to a kind and successful 2025 with groundbreaking shows lol. I'm hopeful.

xxxx

[restinslices]

How do you think earth realm boys would be like around their crush?

Haven’t made moodboards for them so this is all I got rn

Johnny Cage

He would be incredibly shy 

^ That's something I would say if I lost it 

Am I suffering from lack of sleep? Yes. Have I lost the plot? No. 

Johnny is a huge flirt. He was flirting with Kitana and he hardly knew her 

And I'm pretty sure a lot of his MK1 intros is just him flirting or being a little shit 

So with that being said it’s obvious to everyone 

It’s obvious at least that he finds you attractive. The problem would be trying to figure out whether he’s just being Johnny or if he actually likes you 

Which would be difficult 

He flirts, he makes sly jokes, he says how much you should be with him and that he could totally handle you, how great you’d be together and a whole bunch of other shit

Like I said though, the main problem would be knowing if he’s joking or not 

But I think if you simply asked “dude, are you joking?” He’d say “no” immediately 

But Johnny’s eyes tend to wander so you wouldn’t be wrong for being hesitant 

It’d be dogshit if you were just his distraction for the month 

You’d know he’s serious though because he keeps going for months 

Obviously you’ve encountered other attractive people but he doesn’t seem to care about them and his eyes are always on you 

A model could walk by and he’d be too busy pulling your chair to notice 

That’s how you’d know he’s serious. It’s been months and he’s still focused on you? 

Whether or not you share those same feelings is a different story 

Kenshi Takahashi 

Probably one of the hardest to tell 

Idk if this is a headcanon I made up or if it’s canon but I feel like Kenshi is good at hiding certain emotions 

If it’s an emotional moment then yeah, it could slip but this is something more casual 

He wouldn’t say anything but he’d do things for you 

You’d mention you haven’t had time to cook because you’ve been busy and he’d offer to help with whatever 

He’d ask your opinion on stuff first as well 

As friends he makes sure you’re included but it’s even more so if he has a crush (this is not correct English but I cannot think of how else to put this)

One of the other guys would make some joke about him being in love and he’d look at them in a way that would let them know they were right 

Kenshi is not 10 so trying to blackmail him won’t work 

His eyes are always on you and even though he knows he shouldn’t be jealous of other people that are close to you, he can’t help it 

There’s two voices in his head. One says “just tell them”, the other says “you’re gonna mess up your friendship”

So he’d continue to be a little butler lowkey until he actually felt like he had to get a move on 

If someone showed genuine romantic interest in you, then he’d start moving 

He’s either gonna be stereotypically sweet and get flowers and shit or he’s just gonna ask you out at a random time 

Like I said, whether or not you accept his invitation is up to you 

Dude is probably tense as fuck the entire time he’s asking 

Kung Lao

Similar to Johnny 

Kung Lao has such an inflated sense of self, you not liking him makes no sense to him 

Does that mean he just tells you right away though? No

There’s lots of things that make no sense and happen anyway so he plays it safe 

And by safe I mean he is incredibly obvious but doesn’t just straight up tell you 

Lots of flirting and lingering looks 

He does a lot of extra shit then looks to see if you saw it 

It’s like when a kid does a cartwheel then looks to make sure their parents saw them 

He also straight up asks for compliments 

“That was a really good kick, right?”

Sure Kung Lao

He likes compliments way better from you now

He kinda acts the same because everyone knows he has a big head but the flirting makes it obvious 

And Raiden definitely knows. Kung Lao told him because why wouldn’t he?

Anyone joking about stealing you away bothers him a lot more than he’d like to admit 

He’s both “I’m Kung Lao. You have no chance” and “but what if they do have a chance?”

Admits his feelings way sooner than Kenshi 

Probably does it extremely casual too just to rip the bandaid off 

You’re standing next to each other and he’s like “we should go on a date on Friday”

Well since you asked so nicely-

Who’s turning down Kung Lao? Let’s be fr for a second 

Raiden

Doesn’t he like Kitana and it was incredibly subtle? I only found out because of intros 

So with that being said, I think it would be difficult to tell 

He’d act the same way he does as your friend 

I think his fear of messing up your friendship would be higher than everyone else 

So he doesn’t say anything 

In a different post I said he’d give you produce as a gift and I think that’s still the same here 

He’s gonna still have the hookup so food is a frequent gift he gives you to show his affection 

He also offers to do tasks for you 

When it comes to training, he’s probably noticeably softer towards you 

His excuse is “oh, I didn’t notice I was doing that”

It’s a terrible lie 

Everyone at some point finds out because he’s constantly staring at you and is soft towards you 

Raiden is a pretty calm person but he’d actually strangle Kung Lao if he said anything. He’d get a toddler’s grip 

You’d probably find out about it from the other guys instead of him 

And you’d think they’re just fucking around like they always do 

Raiden still refuses to confess. He doesn’t wanna confess then lose you completely 

And tbh he’d probably take so long, you’d get into other relationships and he’d just watch 

Finally though after 279373 years he’d confess which would free him from his emotions and Kung Lao harassing him 

Liu Kang

I think there’d be two stages to this 

The first stage is “I’ll just ignore it”

During this stage he’ll try to ignore his feelings for you because bullshit comes after Liu Kang constantly and dragging you into that is something he definitely doesn’t wanna do 

There’s a good chance you were in the previous timeline and you died horribly so he wants to stay away so he doesn’t fuck up this new life for you 

During this time he’d compliment you on your skills and be a lot more patient with you when it comes to you screwing up (which is something everyone does)

He either involves you in a lot of missions of sidelines you so you won’t be hurt 

Which is kinda shitty because that means he’s sending other people into dangerous situations 

Soon after this stage, he enters the second stage 

This stage is the “fuck it” stage 

Liu Kang does not have a good history when it comes to romance 

He was way too slow and lost Kitana (multiple times I think. I don’t remember what happened in the dlc in MK11) and now in this timeline, Kitana has no memory of them and has no feelings for him. Then he saw his Kitana but they can’t be together. 

Because of this he realizes that he has to start moving quicker and prioritizing his happiness 

So he just asks 

It’s better to hear “no” than to always wonder what could’ve been 

But bitch who is turning down Liu Kang? Don’t be stupid 

He’d probably take you to a secluded spot and say how he feels and ask you to go on a date with him 

It seems like it came out of nowhere but if you review what’s happened between you two, it’ll start to make sense 

[lets-just-daydream]

Hello! If it’s not too much trouble I would love to request an Astarion x reader. Maybe just after he has confessed his plan that fell apart and his feelings for Tav, Gale tries to show her a magic trick. A lot of us have experienced this playing the game, but Tav doesn’t really understand what he’s getting at so she agrees. Then ensues protective and angst and hurt/comfort.

WE LOVE A JEALOUS KING (well, I do anyway)

I took some liberties with the confession for ✨funsies✨

It had been a LONG day of checking through Moonrise Towers. You met some very interesting people but now you were settled in camp and ready for a feed and some sleep. 

You sat outside your tent, pulling your boots off and stretching as you looked around. You had certainly camped in prettier places but dark, dingy and safe was better than nothing. Your eyes landed on Astarion who was pacing back and forth in front of his tent, looking uncharacteristically stressed. You watched as he stood up straight, gave himself a resolute nod and turned in the direction of your tent. His eyes widened when he saw you were already looking his way and he gave you a nervous smile. You returned his smile with a blush and as you were about to look away, he beckoned you over with a wave. 

You wondered what he wanted to talk about. Maybe he wanted to talk about the odd drow woman who wanted him to bite her. You stood with a shudder as you recalled him saying that her blood smelled foul. Admittedly, the potion she offered would have been incredibly useful but you'd rather not have it at all and defend Astarion's decision instead.

You approached him and he gave you a smile while he greeted you. "I wanted to thank you for earlier," he began. "With that vile drow."

"Oh, it was nothing at all," you replied. "I'm sorry she kept asking and wouldn't take your no as an answer."

"Yes it was upsetting at the time and… I'd gotten so used to doing what I was told without a care for what I wanted. It was nice to even be able to say no. And… I'm grateful that you stuck up for me. You didn't have to do that. I know that potion would have been worth a lot."

You smiled and stepped forward, shaking your head slightly. "Nothing is ever worth you doing something you don't want to do. I'll never ask you to do that." 

Astarion sighed. Gods you were so nice. Why were you so nice to him? This is why his whole plan fell apart in the first place - because you "genuinely cared about him" or whatever. Well now the stupid feeling was becoming mutual and he wanted to tell you. 

"Anyway, there's another reason I asked you over," Astarion said, his voice slightly hushed as he swept his gaze over the camp. 

The rest of your companions were either at their own tents or chatting around the fire. He noticed that Gale was watching the two of you intently and it took all of Astarion's self-control not to sneer at him. Nosey bastard. 

You waited patiently as Astarion got his thoughts together. It was nerve wracking - he'd never done this before! And really, he didn't know how you were going to take the initial news that he had been manipulating you. You might slap him. He'd probably deserve it, he thought. 

"Anyway, I suppose I should start from the beginning. At first…" He hesitated, looking down at your smiling face. Oh, you were so pretty. "I-I had this plan, okay. It was out of pure self-preservation, nothing personal of course. I just needed to get you on my side and sleeping with you, calling you cute names and all of that nonsense is how I'm used to getting my way."

Astarion watched as your face fell, you looked down at the ground and he swore you were starting to tear up. He reached out for your arm and drew your attention again..

"But then I got to know you, fought by your side and stood by your decisions whether I agreed with them or not. And that's when my little plan fell apart. I've grown genuine feelings for you," Astarion mumbled the last part as he pulled his hand back. 

You looked up at him and gasped lightly. "Are you serious?"

He nodded. "Using sex and your feelings as a way to manipulate you was awful, and it's a poor excuse but it's… all I knew. Two hundred years of instinct that I'm now trying to shake, you showed me that there's more to it than that. But I understand if this is where you draw the line."

Astarion gave you a little pout and you felt like your heart could burst out of your chest. You stepped forward and pulled him into a hug, nuzzling your face into his cold chest. He stood there for a moment, not really even sure what to do. He hadn't felt a real hug since turning and this felt so nice. He wrapped his arms around you and pressed his cheek to the crown of your head. You let him hold on for as long as he needed and when he eventually let go, you saw the sweetest smile on his face, fangs bared and laugh lines deep. You were so smitten with this man. 

"I care about you, Astarion," you said just above a whisper. "And I know confessing this took a lot of courage."

His smile stayed and he turned slightly giddy. "I'm so… happy to hear you say that. I've never done anything like this before, this is all so new to me and I don't know what comes next, but this is nice. This is what I want," he breathed. 

You gave him a smile and he reached his hand out to you, you placed your hand in his and his stepped forward, leaning his face down but someone cleared their throat behind you. 

You jumped slightly and Astarion looked at the intruder behind you, his eyes turning from soft into a hard glare. 

"What do you want, boot muncher?" Astarion asked. 

You turned around and saw Gale standing there, arms crossed as he brushed the snide comment off. "I need to talk to our friend, here." 

You felt Astarion's grip on your hand tighten but you looked up at him with a soft smile and he nodded, letting your hand go. You loathed to leave him after having such a deep moment but you had other friends who also needed your help. 

"I'll be right back," you whispered before following Gale over to his tent. 

You stood there as he clapped his hands together with a grin on his face. "I've been meaning to ask how much you know about the Weave." 

"The Weave? Just that it's linked to magic," you replied, raising a brow. 

"It’s an incredible feeling and I just learned how to share it, if you want to feel the magic of the Weave,” Gale said, his voice dropping. 

You felt eyes boring into your back and you glanced over at Astarion who held a book in hand but was staring at you intently before averting his eyes back down to the page. 

“Well?” Gale asked, pulling your attention back to him.

“Sounds like fun,” you said with a shrug and grin.

Gale smiled back at you and straightened his back, telling you to do as he did. You watched his hands intently as he did a quick and smooth flourish that caused purple sparks to fly in front of you. 

You stared at the space where the sparks disappeared and then gazed back at Gale’s hands, recalling his movements as you copied them as best as you could remember. Purple sparks also flew out in front of you and you laughed, hardly believing you pulled it off. Your body felt like a warm blanket had been wrapped around you and you glanced up at Gale who was already grinning down at you. 

“Nice work,” he praised. “Now repeat after me and picture harmony…”

He said some magic words slowly so you could follow, which you did and tried to picture what harmony even was. Your mind wandered to Astarion and the calm you’d felt when you shared a hug not long ago. Soft, warm magic suddenly erupted around you and you let out a half sigh, half giggle that you had done it! Gale looked down at you with a smile and you felt a shift in the energy surrounding you when your eyes met. He stepped closer to you and reached to cup your cheek in his hand. 

At that movement you gasped slightly and stepped back, the magic around you falling as you were embraced by the cool breeze of the night once again. 

“Oh, I… I see,” Gale murmured. “I misunderstood, I thought…”

You offered him a sympathetic look and bit your lip. You did feel a little bad but you just didn’t feel that way about him. You turned once again to Astarion but he wasn’t looking at you, he was staring daggers into Gale, his hands and jaw clenched. This was certainly a ‘if looks could kill’ moment and you rubbed Gale’s arm comfortingly before he excused himself into his tent. 

Your stomach twisted uncomfortably as you turned away from his tent to approach Astarion’s but he was already stalking over to you. He wrapped his slender fingers around your arm, pulling you away from Gale’s tent, a scowl on his face. 

“Sleazy, little good for nothing…” Astarion fumed as the pair of you made it back to his tent and stepped inside. “What was that?!” 

You looked up at Astarion’s stern face and shrunk back into yourself slightly. “I- I don’t know he was teaching me how to use magic and then, well you saw what happened.”

“I knew he was up to no good when he came by.”

“Well, anyway,” you said. “I rejected him. So you don’t have to worry.”

Astarion sighed and rubbed your arm, his other arm coming to wrap around your waist. “It’s not you I’m worried about,” he whispered.

“Are you okay?” You asked. 

You nodded. You could understand, he had just bared his feelings for you and someone else had made a move on you only moments later. You each let out a soft sigh and Astarion leaned down and touched his nose against yours, inhaling your scent and rubbing against your skin softly. You leaned up and gave him a soft kiss, his lips pressing harder against yours as his eyes slipped closed.

His grip around your waist tightened and you scrunched your hands into his shirt, a soft moan escaping your throat. You could spend forever pressed against his body like this but he eventually pulled back, and gazed at you with dilated pupils. His expression seemed like he was at odds with himself. He wanted to claim you as his, right then and there on the floor of his tent - to have you as he wanted because you were his heart’s desire. But on the other hand it was still so new to be vulnerable and he didn’t know if this was the right thing to do. If there even was a “right” and “wrong” way of navigating this.

Astarion’s hand slipped from your arm down to your hand and he laced his fingers between yours. “This is just so new to me I don’t know what’s normal… what I’m doing,” he said softly.

You laughed softly and stroked his hand with your thumb. “Just do whatever feels right. You’re your own person and I care so much about you,” you said. “We can take this as slow as you need us to.”

Astarion let out a sigh of relief and pulled you against him in an embrace. He truly believed he would never get enough of feeling your body pressed against his.”Would you like to spend the night with me?”

“Of course,” you breathed, stepping back and sitting on his bedroll. You pulled him down with you and he huffed out a laugh as he landed next to you. You recalled the day you had and you smiled, remembering Astarion’s confession and then your heart dropped as you remembered the moment you shared with Gale and how utterly dejected he was. You hoped it hadn’t impacted your friendship too badly and you certainly hoped he would leave the camp because of it. 

Astarion sensed your change in mood and asked you what was wrong.

“I’m just worried about Gale,” you said. 

Astarion’s tone hardened. “What about him? He’ll be fine.”

You sighed as you hoped Astarion was right. 

“Now, what do I need to do to get him off your mind and get me into it?” Astarion asked as he laid you back and cradled you in his arms. 

“Nothing,” you said with a slight laugh. “Earlier, he asked me to picture harmony and damned if I knew what the hell that meant. But then I started thinking about you and that’s when you saw that burst of magic.”

“Really?” Astarion asked, peering down at you. 

You nodded your head and he pulled you into his chest, his face in your hair. “So don’t worry, you’re already on my mind.”

[cherryhazee]

The Art of Timing | Luke Hughes

wc: 2.3k

Part 1 of The Art of Loving series

Luke is sitting at a table by the window, the soft glow of the library lights giving a quiet warmth over the room. He’s so focused on his textbook that he barely notices the people around him.

Across the room, Avery spots the last open seat right across from him. She heads over, placing her thick textbook on the table with a soft thud, the sound making the curly-haired boy finally look up.

“Mind if I sit?” she asks, her voice soft.

“Um, no. Not at all,” he blurted out, his cheeks heating as he quickly scrambled to move his papers out of the way to make room. Smooth, real smooth, Hughes. He bit back a cringe, trying not to let his nerves show. His cheeks flushed slightly as he looked at the dark-haired stranger before him.

She smiled at him, just a little, but enough to make his stomach flip. “Thanks… uh…” She paused, glancing at him as if searching for something.

“Luke,” he says quickly “I'm Luke Hughes.”

“Nice to meet you, Luke Hughes. I'm Avery” she says, a small smile playing on her lips as she takes the chair out and sits.

They both fall into silence for a few minutes, the awkwardness seems to hang between them for a second, like they are both waiting for something to happen. Luke’s mind raced, his thoughts scattering like confetti. What do I say next? Should I try to be funny? Should I ask her about her major? He had so many things he wanted to say but none of them felt right in the moment. His fingers drummed lightly on the table, his gaze often flicking to his notes before darting back down.

Deciding to break the ice, she leans forward slightly, her lips curling into a smirk. “So, what are you studying for?” she asks while twirling her highlighter between her fingers, the neon pink gleaming under the lights.

He fumbles slightly, glancing down at his notes, a nervous laugh escaping him. “History of… something,” he says, a sheepish smile tugging at his lips. “At this point, it’s just dates and facts blending together.”

Avery laughed softly, her eyes crinkling at the corners. “I feel that,” she said, the lightness in her voice putting him at ease. “I’m trying to memorize every technique for my art exam. I swear if I hear ‘surrealism’ one more time...” She rolled her eyes dramatically, and Luke found himself chuckling along with her.

His face lights up “I’m sure that’s a lot more interesting than dates and wars,” he says with a grin.

She shrugs playfully. “Maybe. But I think the only war I’m fighting right now is with this book.”

Luke’s smile grows as the tension between his shoulders starts to ease and his nerves begin to fade. This isn’t as bad as I thought. She’s easy to talk to. His thoughts drifted for a moment, just enough to realize that he was actually enjoying this conversation.

The air around them seems to shift from awkward to something more comfortable, a quiet connection forming.

Luke spots her again a few days later, this time in the bustling coffee shop near campus. She’s sitting at a table near the back, sketchbook in hand, fully absorbed in her drawing. Unsure whether he should interrupt he hesitates, his hand resting on the handle for a moment longer than necessary. But then he pushes the door open, the bell chiming above him.

Her head lifts at the sound, her face brightening with recognition.

“Hey. Fancy seeing you here,” he says as he takes a step closer, his voice slightly more confident than the last time they spoke. His eyes drift to the sketchbook in front of her. “What are you drawing?”

Avery glances down at her sketchbook, then back up at him. “Just a concept for one of my projects. I’m still working on a few details, but I think it’s getting there.” Her tone light and welcoming. She pats the empty chair beside her, inviting him to sit. “You wanna take a closer look?”

Caught by surprise, he nods, moving to sit. As he leans closer he’s hit with her sweet aroma, something between a mix of vanilla and caramel. “So...What do you think?” her voice snaps him back to reality. Too distracted to think clearly, he replies with the first thing that comes to his mind. “Wow, that’s... really good. Those are, uh, really nice traces.”

She chuckles, the sound light and easy. “Thanks. But it's just practice, honestly. You should see my sketches from last year, they were terrible.” She shrugs like it’s no big deal, but Luke notices the pride in her voice.

He goes to say something else but a notification pings on his phone stealing his attention. He glances at it, then realizes he's running late. “I should probably go... I’ve got a class in a few minutes,” he says while standing up reluctantly.

She nods, smiling. “Of course. We’ll catch up again soon?”

Luke gives her a shy smile, feeling a little guilty for having to leave so quickly. “Yeah, definitely. Take care, Avery.”

“You too, Luke,” she replies, her smile warm as she watches him head toward the door.

Later that day, Luke’s mind kept wandering back to his recent meeting with Avery. The way her face lit up when she recognized him back at the coffee shop, the easy confidence in her voice as she talked about her art, and the casual way she’d invited him to sit with her. The memory of her laughter, soft and genuine, echoed in his mind, pulling him back to those moments over and over.

“Hughesy! Look up!” a voice shouted, startling him from his previous thoughts. He barely managed to dodge the puck coming directly at him, his heart racing as he looked up.

“What’s on your mind these days? You seem distracted.” Ethan, his hockey teammate, asked him while skating closer with a curious look on his face.

Luke forced a casual shrug, gripping his stick a little tighter. “Nothing, man. Just… stuff.” He could feel his cheeks heat up, knowing exactly what or who was occupying his mind.

“Stuff, huh? Didn’t know ‘stuff’ could make a guy zone out mid-practice. Must be someone, sorry, something interesting.” Ethan raised an eyebrow, smirking.

Luke rolled his eyes, trying to brush it off. “It’s nothing serious, really. Just thinking a lot about New Jersey and... yeah.” He said lying a little, he had been thinking about his move to the league these past few days, but not necessarily right now.

Ethan snorted, giving him a knowing nudge. “Right. Well, whatever it is, I’m here if you wanna talk, alright?”

Luke chuckled, shaking his head. “Yeah, yeah. No need to worry,” he shrugged it off trying to change the topic.

But as they lined up for another drill, he couldn’t help as his thoughts slipped back to Avery once again, hoping he would bump into her anytime soon.

And then, as if the universe had answered his thoughts, there she was. A week later, Luke found himself surrounded by the noise and energy of a house party celebrating their team making it to the Frozen Four. He scanned the room pretending to pay attention to Mark, who was reliving some dramatic highlight of the previous game. His eyes gliding over the crowd, some faces he recognized, others he didn’t. The house was packed, bodies moving in sync with the rhythm of the music.

Then, he saw her.

At first, it was just a fleeting glimpse. She was standing by the counter, a red solo cup in her hand, laughing with a small group of people. But it was the way she laughed that caught his attention. It was light and genuine, cutting through the background noise like a melody. Her head tipped back slightly as her eyes sparkled with amusement. In that moment, it wasn’t about her being the center of attention. It was how effortlessly she seemed to draw people in.

For a moment, he stayed rooted in place not knowing if he should come up to her, watching as she brushed a lock of hair behind her ear. She looked effortlessly stunning, her dark chestnut hair falling loose over her shoulders and her outfit somehow casual yet put-together.

Mark, still mid-story, followed Luke's gaze and immediately caught on. He raised an eyebrow, a knowing smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Oh, I see how it is,” he said with a wink before giving Luke a playful nudge. “I’ll let you two talk.” Without missing a beat, Mark turned and melted into the crowd, leaving him standing there.

And then, as if sensing his gaze, she turned, her eyes landing on him.

A smile broke across her face, bright, warm, and entirely unguarded. “Luke!” she called out, lifting her cup in mock salute. “Look who decided to show up to his own party!”

Luke’s stomach did a flip while he grinned and watched as she took a few steps toward him. “Didn’t know this was your kind of scene,” he teased, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans to steady himself.

“What can I say? I’m full of surprises,” she replied, her tone light and playful.

The night stretched on, and though they mingled with others here and there, it was clear that Luke and Avery kept gravitating back to each other. At one point, they found themselves at the kitchen table, challenging each other to a few rounds of beer pong. Avery’s competitiveness came out in full force as she landed shot after shot, leaving Luke impressed and more than a little competitive himself.

“Okay, okay, you’re good,” he conceded after a particularly tight round. “But I’m still winning this.”

“Oh, you wish,” Avery shot back with a wink, tossing a ping-pong ball into the air for the last cup. It hit the rim and rolled off, missing it by barely a few inches. She let out a dramatic sigh, throwing her head back in mock defeat.

It was Luke's turn, he grabbed the ball and waited a few beats before finally taking his shot. The ball traced a perfect path in the air before dropping cleanly into the last cup, a triumphant little plop echoing off the table.

“Guess I’m not on my best game tonight,” she said, reaching for her cup and drinking its content. Her eyes flicked back to him, playful and daring. “You’re lucky you’re cute. Otherwise, I might’ve been unimpressed.”

Luke’s heart skipped a beat at the unexpected compliment. He quickly masked it with a casual shrug, trying to match her easy confidence. “Guess I’m lucky then,” he said, his grin growing.

As the crowd began to thin, Luke noticed how much of the night had slipped away while they were together. “Hey,” he said, his voice a little softer than usual, “I really enjoyed tonight. We should do this again sometime.”

Avery smiled, a warmth in her eyes that matched his own. “Definitely,” she said. “It’s been fun. But I should probably head out, got an early class tomorrow.”

“Yeah, same with practice. Let me walk you out,” Luke offered, already moving to grab a jacket.

The cool night air greeted them as they stepped outside, a stark contrast to the heat and noise of the party. The sound of the music faded as the door swung shut behind them, leaving only the crunch of their steps on the gravel driveway and the distant hum of the night.

Avery let out a soft laugh. “It’s colder than I expected,” she said, her breath visible in the frosty air.

Luke noticed Avery shiver slightly, rubbing her hands together for warmth. Without a second thought, he took off his jacket and draped it over her shoulders, his fingers brushing against her skin as he adjusted it.

“Here,” he said, offering it with a small smile. “Wouldn’t want you freezing.”

Avery chuckled softly as she slipped it on. “Thanks,” She tugged the zipper halfway up, her hands momentarily lingering in the pockets to chase warmth. “I always forget how cold these spring nights can get.”

Luke glanced at her, his hands buried in the pockets of his jeans. “You’d think we’d be used to this by now,” he said, smiling.

As they kept walking, Luke glanced at her out of the corner of his eye, his hands shoved deep into his jeans pockets to keep from fidgeting. The soft glow of the streetlamp caught in her dark hair, making it shimmer like strands of polished wood. For a moment, he thought about saying something—anything—but the easy silence between them felt too perfect to break.

As they reached her friend’s car, Avery stopped and turned toward him, “Thanks for walking me out,” she said, her voice softer now. “I know you didn’t have to, but... I appreciate it.”

Luke shrugged, trying to play it cool despite the way her words made his chest tighten. “It’s no big deal. I just wanted to make sure you got here okay.”

A slightly hesitant smile appeared on her face. “I’ll see you around, right?”

“Of course,” Luke replied, his smile genuine. “I’ll be looking forward to it.”

She nodded, stepping back. “Take care, Luke.”

“You too, Avery,” he said softly.

As she climbed into the car, Luke stepped back, shoving his hands into his pockets again. He stayed rooted in place until the taillights disappeared down the street, the faint hum of the engine lingering in the air.

Turning back, Luke found the walk home stretching longer than it should have. Even as the air grew colder, his mind kept returning to her—her laugh, the warmth she gave off, and the way she made everything feel easier. Something about her made the world feel a little less loud.

As he entered the living room, he was met with the expecting eyes of his friends. “So? Did you get her number? You two seemed close” Dylan said while smirking at him. Luke's smile faltered as he registered the words his best friend had just said.

“Shit, you didn’t. Didn’t you?” Ethan said as he took in Luke’s face.

“No...but! I’m sure I’ll see her around, I always do” he replied trying to not worry much about it.

But little did he know…

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