#I'm going to assume it's Charlotte but I really don't know

[shima-draws]

Haha remember when I said Genshin was being homophobic by running Alhaitham and Kazuha at the same time. Ahaha.

First 10 pull on Kazuha’s banner. I get Kazuha. I go to pull on Alhaitham’s. Two pulls in I get Qiqi. (I am sad to be once again cockblocked by Qiqi.) Two pulls after THAT I pull Alhaitham. What the fuck. What the actual,,

I pulled THREE five stars within 60 wishes. How in the FUCK

I’m so sorry for ever doubting you Genshin I may have called you homophobic but you blessed me during this Pride Month

[funnycreatortimetravel]

Whenever I rewatch the Madoka Magica episodes + the two recap movies, I always feel that the sentiment "Homura did nothing wrong," shines through the most here and less so Rebellion (I'll get into this later) even though ironically, the Rebellion movie is where that infamous saying was coined.

-Homura cannot DO any wrong when everything sort of already goes wrong no matter if she intervenes or not. Mami dies whether or not Homura intervenes (she goes crazy when she finds out that magical girls are all destined to turn into witches and then goes on a murder-suicide rampage, she's killed by Walpurgis, she gets caught off guard, etc.) All of these deaths happened on Mami's accord and not Homura's, so of course there's no wrongdoing to be had.

-Even if you argue that Homura could've been nicer to her, Mami automatically assumed that Homura had the worst intentions for Madoka and the others, so she never really gave her a chance even WHEN Homura went through the effort of finding a grief seed solely to befriend Mami (which Homura does in most timelines FYI.) The moment Homura isn't Mami's sweet little junior student anymore, Mami is automatically on defense and even calls her a loser just because she doesn't want Madoka to make a contract, and Mami just assumes that it's because Homura doesn't want competition (which makes no sense because Homura offered her a grief seed.)

-Mami does the same thing to Kyoko in the Different Story Manga; Once Kyoko's parents died and she became distraught, she didn't want to follow Mami's ideals anymore and this leads them into getting into a physical altercation (sound familiar?)

-Mami has never been a person you can just causally talk things through to. If she believes you don't share the same ideals on things, she can and will fight you. She doesn't fight Sayaka or Madoka because those two largely agree with her on everything, but Kyoko and Homura? They're free game if they so much as look at her sideways.

-Mami also says that making a wish should be something you seriously think about and not just dive in willy nilly, but then turns around and tells Madoka that she should wish for a cake if she still hasn't figured it out all because Mami doesn't want to be alone.

-I'm going to give Mami the benefit of the doubt and assume she wasn't being serious, but she knows how impressionable Madoka is and regardless of how serious or not she is, she's still fine with Madoka making a wish and becoming a magical girl just so she won't be lonely anymore.

-Homura tries her damn hardest to befriend Mami (she offers her a grief seed as I mentioned earlier, she listens when Mami tells her to go away without a fuss, and she warns Mami of the witch Charlotte only to be ignored and tied up) and the only thing she gets in return is Mami's unwarranted hostility. And once Homura is proven right and Mami is beheaded in front of Madoka and Sayaka, causing an insurmountable amount of trauma to them, she still quietly grieves for her even when all Mami did was assume the worst with no evidence.

-I don't necessarily blame Mami for assuming that Homura didn't have the best intentions since she's a veteran and I'm certain has had other negative run-ins with magical girls, but it's not like Homura even provided enough evidence that she would be like them. Mami was just being territorial due to force of habit (she's fine with other magical girls so long as they stay her juniors as evident in Rebellion when the moment Homura "turns different," she's highly suspicious and is ready to go guns blazing.) She doesn't even give Homura a chance to explain herself in either the show or the movie and that's one of her biggest flaws; she's so perfectionist that she can't even see what's in front of her sometimes.

-Despite this, Homura still values her as her old mentor and is hurt when the person who saved her all those timelines ago calls her a loser to her face. She even says that Mami has the softest heart of all and wishes she could forget how she trampled over her and other's feelings, (even though when you look back, Mami was the one who hurt her feelings rather than the other way around.)

And yet she still says this...

-"And it hurt me..." Homura admitting that shows just how much she cares. The fact that she's able to admit that it wasn't what Mami said that hurt her, but the fact that shattering Mami's optimistic viewpoint with the reality of the magical girl system was what hurt.

-Homura knows about Mami's tragic backstory with her parents and also knows that Mami, "doesn't have any other family to speak of," which shows she's been very close to Mami at one point, even seeing her vulnerable side just like Madoka did when Mami had that breakdown shortly before she died to Charlotte.

-She also "envies Mami" because Madoka states that she'll remember her even after she dies. Homura is obviously envying Mami because Madoka will forever see Mami in a good light in death while Madoka is afraid of her, but she could also just be envying Mami because, well, Mami died and left Madoka feeling attached to her while Homura thought she was going to die without ever being able to be close to Madoka as she once was. Context clues people, context clues.

-If you look at the different story manga, which I and many others consider canon, Homura clearly still has PTSD from Mami's murder-suicide attempt, which is the main reason why she tries to be gentle with her and listen to her when she's ordering Homura around.

-And she also notes that Mami never "held her hand," like that. Regardless of what Homura thinks, she clearly still wants or wanted that intimacy with Mami. She still saw her as an older sister figure and I know it crushed her heart when Mami said something so cruel to her.

-She also declines when Mami believes that Homura is going to kill her, even though her soul gem is stained and she technically is on her way to becoming a witch. Instead, Homura imparts some words to her.

-In the case of Sayaka...Whooo boy, it's like ten times worse than Mami. Sayaka is so caught up in her ideals that she hates anything too wild and selfish, but also weak and passive. She craps on Kyoko for being immoral and then also craps on Madoka AND Homura for not doing enough (she says that Madoka has a lot of potential but doesn't do anything with it and says Homura is too unskilled to fight effectively.) She views herself, or at least tries to, as the ultimate magical girl of justice who's moral, selfless, and most of all, strong. She doesn't view Homura, at least the one in the past timelines, as someone strong enough to be a proper magical girl.

-Sayaka holds everyone to the standard of Mami Tomoe, someone who's graceful, strong, and selfless, but she never gets the chance to realize that that version of Mami Tomoe isn't the real one and the standard she holds herself and others don't exist, which is why in every single timeline, she ALWAYS ends up witching out. It's also why in every timeline, she's antagonistic to Homura no matter if it was her timid self or the one hardened by trauma.

-She blames Homura in one timeline for attempting to warn them about Kyubey, accusing her of trying to split the group up, but then in Magia Record, when Homura DOESN'T tell them about Kyubey because she's seen how pointless it is, Sayaka gets on her case for not telling them sooner and accuses her of not telling because Homura "finds it funny." She literally can't win, no matter how quiet and out of the way she is.

-And it doesn't get better once Homura becomes "stronger" (or at the least the facade of becoming it) Sayaka just thinks that she's one of those magical girls who kills only for herself (and while Sayaka's not ALL the way wrong as she will kill solely for Madoka, she also doesn't understand that the system is designed to be like that and that's the fault of Kyubey and not Homura.)

-We're never actually shown Homura saving civilians, but we also don't see her sit idly by and let them get hurt either. Homura's viewpoint is that magical girls aren't morally obligated to be heroes and she's right; magical girls are cattle being harvested and the "good" they do is only delaying the inevitable once they witch out. No matter how noble and pure Sayaka was or wanted to be, she was eventually going to witch out and harm others, even if she wanted to save people.

-The nature of magical girls is equivalent exchange; whatever "good" is done, an equal amount of or even more bad is sure to come of it. Sayaka was going to keep killing innocent civilians as a witch until someone put her out of her misery, and that was what Homura was going to do. Sayaka doomed herself the moment she made a contract with Kyubey, and more importantly, she doomed innocent civilians, and she doomed her friends.

-Sayaka's witching out leads Mami to go crazy and attempt to kill everyone, Madoka making a contract in several timelines to save Sayaka from witching out (she does so in the Different Story Manga and Sayaka still ends up hurt) and Kyoko dying either from suicide during her confrontation with Octavia or dying from the wounds she sustains from the battle. Not to mention Sayaka witching out breaks Madoka's psyche, which is what Homura is trying to avoid.

-It would be one thing if Sayaka just died on her own accord, but she always brings others with her down her descent into despair, whether it's by killing civilians as a witch or being mean to Madoka and making her feel as though Sayaka's witching out was partly her fault.

-That's why Homura was in the right to "put her down" essentially, and even though she said she would, she couldn't bring herself to because somewhere deep down, she still cared for Sayaka. She apologizes for blowing up Sayaka in one of the first few timelines when she witches out and she blames herself for Sayaka making a contract in the TV series timeline, even saying that she should've protected Sayaka as much as Madoka even though Sayaka has never been anything BUT mean to her in the beginning. She takes responsibility for the girls' downfall even though it was inevitable.

-Another thing is her kinship with Kyoko. Because Kyoko and Homura both grew up in religious homes (Homura with catholic school and obliviously Kyoko's father being a preacher) they have the closest views on what it means to be magical girls. Note how I didn't say similar, but closest. Homura and Kyoko's wishes were for someone else, and as a result, they firmly believe that their wishes are for the sake of those people and won't pretend to be heroes or the like. The only difference is that Kyoko is much wilder and rougher because her wish directly led to the murder-suicide of her family (cough cough, like a big sister figure that killed her OTHER found family.)

-It's also the reason why Homura and Kyoko became so close in Rebellion. Kyoko was the only magical girl, apart from Madoka and even SHE sometimes didn't trust Homura, to kill Walpurgis. Kyoko agrees to fight with Homura and even though she is purely doing this for her benefit, she at least gives Homura a CHANCE and hears her out, even offering her a pocky stick. She was willing to team up with her and was also the first person that Homura felt comfortable talking to in Rebellion when she felt that something was up.

(I'll go into further specifics in another post since I ran out of image/video usage. Damn this app 😭.)

[charlie-lec-stories]

A lovely mess // CL16

Pairing: Charles Leclerc / Original Female Character

Summary: Four times Charles overreacted to becoming a father and one he actually failed to react. Or Charles being a mess through the best and most scary adventure of his life.

Warnings: None, this is pure wholesomeness.

Author’s Note: This one was inspired by some stories my own dad and uncle told me about the times they had their first children. Yes, some of those stories are based on things my father did when him and my mom were expecting me hahahaha. Rate: PG

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Every man reacts differently to pregnancy, but the most common response is just simply becoming a mess of a human being. And because of that, Charles, for once in his life, could be considerer an average man. He had been exceptional his whole life: excellent student at school, talented in arts, languages and sports, remarkable people skills and loved by everyone. People assumed that he was going to be an exceptional father too, and he knew he was committed to the role since day one, but none of that made the experience less scary. The monegasque had always want kids, he had always pictured himself growing old with a woman he loved and raising a bunch of little humans. When he knocked up his girlfriend he was definitely not planning on becoming a father so soon in his life, but he was happy nonetheless. His history with his girlfriend was kind of complicated too, her family didn't like him much, or more precisely the fact that Charles' job made her travel around the globe, away from her family all the time. He knew that he loved her more than he had ever loved anyone in his life, he knew that every time he pictured himself in the future, that future was shared with her, but it would be a lie if he'd say that the pregnancy didn't complicate things. His in-laws weren't too happy when they found out and Charles' mother was kind of worried about the whole situation. But Charles and his girl loved that little "accident" more than life itself and they actually never cared too much about anyone else's opinions. He convinced his girlfriend to move in with him and she also agreed on keep traveling with him until she ultimately had to stay home for the baby's safety.

"Is six weeks really that bad, Amour? I mean, maybe you're jet lagged or something". Charles nervously wondered from sitting at the bottom of the bed, his girl anxiously pacing around the room.

"That's not how periods work, Charlie". She was trying to stay calm and not bark at him, but that was a difficult task.

"Then let's buy a test and find out". He got up and started walking to the door when she grabbed his arm.

"Wait! You can't just go to a pharmacy and buy a test!". She looked at him like he was insane.

"Why not?". If there was someone humble enough to always forget he's rich and famous, that was Charles.

"Because you're Charles fucking Leclerc, that's why!". She let go of his arm and ran her hand down her face, exasperated. "The press is going to have a field day if you do that".

"Shit, you're right". He sighed and his shoulders sunk. He could see her shaking, scared and stressed and all he wanted to do was give her answers so she could get some peace of mind. "I'm sorry, Amour, I just don't know what to do".

"Let's call Lorenzo, maybe Charlotte can buy it for us".

He watched her take care of everything: call his brother, open the door for him and Charlotte, explain the situation, decide over test brands with his sister in law, drink loads of water, all while he sat on the couch, his mind running faster than he had ever drove his Ferrari. How could she think so clearly even with how scared she was? What would he do if the test was positive? What if she didn't want to keep the baby? Why was he feeling so sad with the mere idea of the test turning up negative? Was he really ready to be a father? There were so many questions and so little answers. He could hear Charlotte walk out the door and his girlfriend go their room, he clearly felt his older brother sit by his side on the couch, but he just couldn't move. Lorenzo said something Charles never caught, too drown inside his own head.

"I really want this baby, Enzo". Was all he let out and his brother just squeezed his shoulder.

Charlotte came back pretty fast, a paper bag with at least five different tests for his girl to do. The older woman explained the younger which ones were more effective so they could compare the results later. The possible future mother lock herself into the bathroom while the other three waited outside. Charles felt like he waited for an eternity before she came out with the five little white sticks. She placed them over a napkin on the coffee table and Lorenzo set the timer. Now, they had to wait again. She was sitting on the same couch he was before, looking at everything but the tests in front of her, so he sat down and took her hand in his, hoping for the contact to be enough to ease her thoughts. He wasn't exactly the epitome of calmness and the sweat that covered his hand made it hard to grip at. She looked at him and smiled, she knew that he was going to be there for them, no matter what, but she was still scared of what he would think, she still needed to know if he really wanted this. Still, she refrained from asking and simply rested her head on his shoulder, searching for comfort on his scent. She had her eyes closed when she suddenly flew to the other side of the couch while Charles' loud yelp filled her ears.

"What the fuck was that?". She looked around, trying to find what could have startled him so much to trow her like that, but all she could see was Charles clumsily trying to grab one of the tests while his feet barely kept him up. She had never seen him so uncoordinated in the two years they had been together. His fingers had a mind of their own and his legs were trembling.

"Two lines, this one has two lines". Charles, who had been quiet and petrified for the past hour, was mumbling like a madman as he showed his brother one of the tests. In the background, the alarm set by Lorenzo started ringing and they all looked down at the coffee table, searching for the lines of truth. Charles grabbed the the tests smiling wide as he showed them to the others. "THEY ALL HAVE TWO LINES". He was hyperventilating, his whole body shaking and Lorenzo couldn't help but let out his loudest laugh as he watched his younger brother loose the little bits of sanity he had. "CAN YOU SEE IT, BABY?!". He shoved the sticks into his girlfriend's face. "It's a baby! We made a baby! Putain de merde! I'm going to be a Papa!".

"Yes, Charlie! I see it!". She said sharing his enthusiasm. But then she saw him go pale really fast. He walked backwards a few steps and Lorenzo caught him from behind before he could fall butt first on the ground.

"Okay, I think you need to process this rollercoaster of emotions while sitting on the couch, Cha". The older Leclerc helped his bother to sit down next to the now confirmed future mama. There, Charles took her hand and smiled, a high-like expression covering his eyes. He may be scared, but he had never been happier.

If Charles' reaction to the pregnancy was that chaotic, it was a sure thing that the following nine months would be as well. Before the first trimester was up, he had already brought another house to move to, where the baby could have their own room and a playroom. He brought every piece of Ferrari merchandizing he could find on the internet, he didn't even care if it was original or not. Was it pretty? Yes. Was it Ferrari? Yes. Then he was buying it. His girlfriend even went to the extent of taking away his cards and threatened with getting rid of wifi to make him stop. He didn't, took her extension in the middle of the night and kept binge-shopping for his baby at 4 am. He brought furniture for the bedroom and the playroom, and then he found his biggest rival till the day. A rival he wanted to beat more than Max Verstappen: a crib. She wasn't even showing and he was already putting a crib together, or let's rephrase it, fighting with the crib and losing pathetically.

"Cela n'a aucun sens". (This makes no sense). He complained while he tried to attach what was supposed to be 'Part B' to 'Part 3.1'. Why there was a part 3.1, he didn't know and was too stress out to try and figure it out. He growled, he literally growled when the whole crib came crushing down in front of him. "Je déteste cette merde". (I hate this shit).

"Charlie? What's wrong? I heard a loud noise". He looked at the mother of his child and all he could feel was embarrassment. "Are you alright?".

"Yes. I'm fine". He answered from the floor, looking at his lap. He wanted to cry, but he also didn't want to upset her.

"Hey, you know you can tell me anything, right?". She sat next to him on the floor and searched for his eyes, but he kept looking away from her. "What is it, Charles?".

"I-". He tried to start talking, but he was cut off by his own sob. She quickly made him turn towards her, looking for injuries, but he seemed to be physically fine. She saw the tears running down his face and did the best she could to wipe the away. Moving to sit on his lap, she threw her arms around his neck and pressed herself flat against him, trying to get as close as she could. He cried on her shoulder, soaking her his hoodie and crushing her with his arms around her waist. They stayed like that for a while, until Charles stopped crying. She scratched his head to calm him down and after some time, he did. In a painfully soft whisper, he admitted his fear to her. "I'm going to be a terrible Papa".

"Don't say that. We both know that's not true". Shushing him, she pulled away and grabbed his face, forcing him to look at her. "Is this about the crib?".

"I've been fighting this crib for four days. Our baby is going to sleep on the floor and it's all my fault". She laughed and for a moment, she regretted it, seeing the hurt in his eyes. She calmed down and pecked his lips.

"Charlie, our baby has barely formed their ears yet, you have more than enough time to figure this out". He didn't look convinced at all.

"But what if I don't?". She smiled at him.

"I know you will. Do you want to know why?". He nodded and she ran her fingers through his hair to move it away from his face, so they could look into each others eyes and make him believe her. "Because you already are the best Papa in the world, Charles".

He won against the crib just in time to catch up with the worst part of the cravings period. They were into the fourth month of pregnancy and the little bump was proudly starting to show. Charles couldn't keep his hands away from it. He was constantly touching the bump, kissing the bump, talking to the bump, even scolding the bump whenever he saw some discomfort tinting his girlfriend's face. In the paddock he practically forced her to go everywhere with him and on interviews he answered every question while looking at her. He insisted on people staying at least ten centimeters away from her and he even took upon himself the task of preparing every meal she ate, just to make sure that it was safe and she didn't get food poisoned. He checked places' and foods' temperatures, chairs' and couches' safety, if her shoes were properly tied (at least 20 times a day), the only thing missing was him wrapping her on bobble wrapping. He safety proofed the every hotel room they stayed in so she wouldn't 'accidentally hit the bump against unknown furniture in the dark'. At some point, she had to put a stop to the madness, specially when Charles' newly-daddy paranoia messed with her cravings.

"Amour, what are you eating?". He asked when he caught her hiding with Lando and Max behind the Red Bull garage, a massive greasy half eaten hot dog on her hands. Lando was opening a mayonnaise sachet with his teeth and Max was feeding her french fries with his bare hands, all three of them sitting on the floor. It wasn't exactly the most sanitary situation, but the fuzzy feeling she felt inside her chest thanks to that hot dog made it all worth it. Charles could swear he had an aneurysm just by the sight of it all. "Where did you get that?".

"Uhm...". Her and Lando looked at Max, waiting for him to answer, since he was the one who brought it.

"Well... It's from a professional, I can assure you that, Charles". The monegasque frowned and Max swallowed, scared, just to find out his mouth was completely dry. He wasn't an easily scared guy, but something about Charles' over-protective-dad mood just terrified him.

"And where's the professional's place? Can you show me?". Max, still sitting on the floor, looked at everything but Charles.

"Oh, you see-".

"It's from the stand outside of the paddock". Lando blurted out, followed by him covering his mouth with both his hands and the three of them heard Charles growl.

"Max did you just feed my pregnant girlfriend a hot dog from a dirty street-stand? YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW IF THE PERSON WASHES THEIR HANDS-"

"They definitely don't, I mean, they don't have where to".

"Lando, you're not helping me, mate". Max advised, not moving his eyes from the fuming Charles above him. Then the pregnant girl decided to intervene.

"Charlie, babe, it's okay. I asked him to buy it for me". Charles then looked at her, his gaze softening a little, but still angry.

"Amour, you know that's not good for you". He walked to her and hooked his arms under hers to help her off the floor.

"But the baby wanted it". Max still followed Charles, afraid of what the future father could do to him for messing with his unborn baby's diet. Lando stayed very still, hoping to make himself invisible. "I was just craving this so bad! And you never let me have this type of food. The baby is fine, I promise".

"Don't do that face, it's not fair". He complained when she gave him her best puppy eyes. She didn't stop, and he finally dropped the attitude. "Okay, maybe we can make some room for a hot dog once in a while. But you have to keep eating healthy, we don't want the little Tifosi to come out malnourished".

"Yay!". She squealed and hugged him tight, the hot dog almost falling from her hand. Charles hugged her back and then directed his gaze towards the other two drivers.

"And you two". Max and Lando looked at him wide-eyed. "This better be the last time you pull off something like this. Did I make myself clear?".

"Yes, sir". Both said at the same time and got up from the floor.

"Okay, go on. And think about what you did". They nodded their heads, Max handing the girl the fries and then walking away with Lando.

"I like you daddy-voice". Charles shrugged at her comment.

"Amour, don't call it that or I won't be able to use it without laughing".

Charles' paranoia got better. He calmed down a little, but then the fear of being a bad father came back. Around the seventh month, already knowing they were having a boy, Charles found himself with insomniac. At the beginning of the pregnancy he was scared of not knowing what to do to take care of a baby's basic needs: bottle feed, change diapers, help him to sleep, and things like that. But as the date of the delivery got closer, Charles' fears shifted to the more existential type. What if he was unable to guide his son through life? What if he failed on teaching him good values and a strong sense of ethics? What if he ended up raising a spoiled kid, arrogant and narcissistic? What if he couldn't make his boy happy? What if his kid hated him? Those questions kept him up at night, turning over and over on the bed, and cold sweat covering his body. He would walk to the baby's room and look at the painting his girlfriend did on the walls, the name 'Jules' written on lilac on a clear sky, over the race track so carefully crafted. What if his son didn't want to race cars? What if he was forcing him to do so when he wasn't even born? Sitting on the rocking chair, he would look out the window, the yachts at the bay clearly visible from there. What if his son didn't like Monaco? What if his son would rather adopt his mother's nationality and culture over his? The dark sky adorned with shinny little dots would look back at him without answers.

"Charlie? Why are you up, love?". He heard his girl's sleepy voice call out to him from the doorway. He smiled at her, his eyes glossy as he fought the tears that wanted to escape.

"Just thinking, Amour. Don't worry". He gave her his best smile, but she could read his real feelings underneath it. "Go back to bed, I'll join you in a minute".

"I think we love each other enough to cut the bullshit, babe". She walked further into the room and stopped in front of him, her big belly at his face's height, and he couldn't help but reach forward and kiss it. "What is it?"

"It's... it's just a lot and it's late. Don't worry, really-"

"Charles, I'm not sleeping until I'm convinced that you're alright". He sighed, and pulled her to his lap. The weight was a little bit more than what he was used to, but he loved that, it made it impossible for him to overlook the fact that his baby was there, with them. He made her rest her back against his chest and rocked he chair, hugging her tight against him and resting his chin over her shoulder. They both looked out of the window and she patiently waited for him to tell her what was going on inside his mind.

"I'm scared. I feel this huge responsibility over Jules". She smiled, loving whenever they talked about their baby using the name they choose for him. "I just want to be a good Papa, but I'm so scared of messing up, of making the wrong choices, of using the wrong words, of leading him in the wrong direction. What if I don't raise him right? If I'm not a good role model?"

"Well, you're not alone in this, Charlie, I'm with you till the end of the line. Like Bucky and Steve. I know that we'll be alright. I just know it". She sounded so sure of herself. He wished he could be that sure about everything.

"How do you do it? How do you manage to always be so sure and composed?". She laughed and he felt the baby kick under his palm, he always kicked when she laughed.

"I've been the least composed person and you know it, Charlie! I break down crying at least five times a day. You've seen that! You're the one who comforts me every time". He laughed softly, that was true, those had been some pretty crazy seven months. A true rollercoaster of emotions. And they still had two more months to go. "I know that we'll be alright because we're already asking ourselves these questions. Because we care about Jules so much that we truly take time to think things through. We are going to be alright because we love our baby and we both know we will always do the best we can for him. We won't let the bad choices from our parents be repeated and we'll make sure to copy the best from them to give to Jules. That's why I'm so sure". She turned to look at him for a moment. "I trust you to be the dad of my baby because I know how great of a human being you are, Charles".

"I love you". He said, feeling a lot better. He kissed her tenderly, and then another kick was felt under his hand. "Thanks for being here for me, Amour".

"Always, just as you had always been for me". She nuzzled her nose against his. Another kick and they both laughed. "Let's go back to bed, Papa".

The two months passed by in a blink. Charles asked Ferrari to give him a leave of absence for the first two races of the season. He wanted to be world champion, but he would rather be there when his son was born. Ferrari let him take his time, but Jules decided to be born at eight and a half months. It seemed like he couldn't wait to meet his parents, because everything happened so fast that Charles had barely had any time to react. They were having lunch at his mother's house, and he was having the best time. His girl looked amazing, all radiant and happy, her belly covered by a cute but comfortable dress, his sisters in law both touching the belly and fighting for godmother duties. Lorenzo and Charlotte were definitely the chosen ones, but they hadn't tell anyone yet, after all both Lorenzo and Charlotte were there for them when they needed them. His mother was showing him little clothes that she had crocheted for Jules and his brothers discussing which one was going to be the 'responsible uncle' and who the 'funcle'. Arthur was definitely unable to be the responsible one, so he was already chosen to be the 'funcle'. Every conversation was cut short when the faint voice of the future mama rang through the air.

"Charlie". Her shaken voice called out, and he turned around to see what she needed. There was a wet patch under her and she was grabbing her belly, a painful expression on her face. "I think my water broke".

"The baby is coming!". Arthur shouted excitedly, but Charles' brain just stopped functioning. He saw everyone running around to grab things, Charlotte and Carla helping his girl out of the house and towards his car, Lorenzo grabbing the baby bag the carried around just in case since the beginning of the last trimester, Arthur pushing him outside and his mother speaking, but he just couldn't move. H was petrified. He felt like his blood pressure had dropped in a second and if it wasn't for Arthur behind him, he would have certainly fallen to the ground. His mother took his car keys out of his pocket and then they pushed him on the back seat, next to his girlfriend. Her hand crushing his brought him back from his outer-body state and he was able to react, turning to face her and running his other hand down her arm, doing his best to sooth her.

"It's okay, mon amour. Breath, breath with me". He instructed her and he started to exaggerate his breathing so she could copy her. She did and that calmed her down enough to count the seconds between one contraction and the next. "That's it, Amour, you're doing so good". He praised her and she smiled a little, her happy expression cut short by another waive of pain. She screamed and cried, sweat covering her forehead and running down her face, mixing with her tears. It was probably the most messy she had ever looked, but he had never seen her as beautiful as in that moment. "I love you so much". He whispered it, but by the squeeze she gave to his hand, he knew for sure she was saying it back. "We're almost there, hung on a little longer".

He almost carried her out of the car and into the hospital the second Arthur parked the car. Then, they found out that she was ready to deliver in that second. Jules didn't want them to keep him waiting, she was brought to the delivery room and Charles was given surgical gown so he could join her. Inside, the whole process was quick, in 30 minutes, Jules was crying on the doctors arms and Charles could feel his heart skip a beat. Wrapped on towel and with the small hat they had for him on, Jules was passed on to his mother, who took him instantly while she cried her eyes out. Charles, still on delay with reality, was trying to process the information. That was his baby, he was finally there, he could finally touch him. The doctor walked to him, placing a hand on his shoulder, Charles couldn't stop looking at his girl and little Jules. He heard a softly "go ahead, meet your boy", and that was enough for him to place a shaking and gentle hand on Jules' head. He ran his thumb over the soft little cheek and the tears started to fall. He felt his girl's hand wipe away his tears and heard her laugh softly. She just found funny that after overreacting about every little thing for the past eight months, Charles was barely able to react that day. He was a mess in that moment, but he was the perfect mess in her eyes. The most extraordinary mess. He finally smiled and reached down to kiss her head, then he looked at Jules.

"I am your Papa, Jules. I love you. I'm so happy to finally meet you".

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I hope you guys liked this one!

[httpiastri]

jak crawford x reader

the ring is perfect.

it's not too big, but loose enough to make it easy to twirl around around your finger with your thumb. it's more of a nervous habit than anything else, really; but jak still places his hand over yours to still your movements.

it's very simple, with a silver band and a few little gemstones along the edge. you haven't asked what they're made of; you know he can afford them with all of his racing money, but you really don't care if they're diamonds or glass shards. besides, a wildly expensive ring wouldn't really fit into this setting, anyway.

jak's thumb brushes over your knuckles, his eyes following the dressed-up lawyer running in through the front door looking more than mildly confused. a security officer shows him the right way to some courtroom, her voice drowned out by the wails of a toddler in the far corner of the waiting room. the mother of the child tries anything she can to cheer him up, bouncing him on her knee and singing songs and playing with his toy cars, as the bags under her eyes seem to grow deeper by the second. the father merely grunts beside her and scrolls further down the news article on his phone.

the noise level in the room is not objectively loud per se; you're just a little extra sensitive, you assume. but at the same time, you could probably fall asleep right here and now, lulled to a slumber by the ambient music flowing from the speakers. it's been a long night, to be fair – it's already nearing eight in the morning, meaning you've been up for over a day – but it had to be done.

your parents were thankfully fast asleep when jak arrived at your door some seven hours ago. you've never been good at sneaking around, but with parents who always sleep like the dead after a few drinks, you've never had any reason to. the actual packing and moving of all your personal belongings into jak's car wasn't that time-consuming, but the car ride back to his home in charlotte, north carolina, along with the waiting for the courthouse to finally open, took all night.

it all felt far too familiar. like jumping into his car when he picked you up from school, not caring that your parents were expecting you to go straight home; running away with him during the weekends, paying no mind to your parents' enforced house arrest; most importantly, spending time with that one boy they did never approve of.

but it was never quite this serious when you were younger.

you're still teenagers now, but it's so different. you're far more grown; far more mature than those little kids you were years ago when you still lived in charlotte, just a thirty minute drive away from jak, before your parents bought that house some 500 miles away. you feel like you're a completely new person – and yet, that little girl from all those years ago still blushes inside of you when you turn your head to meet jak's eyes.

"are you sure you want to go through with this?" he asks, eyes scanning yours for any kind of sign. "you seem... unsure."

you shake your head instantly. "i'm just tired."

tired of waiting, planning, stalling.

tired of being anything other than his.

he gives you a quick nod, his hand squeezing yours, his own wedding band cool against the back of your hand.

jak bought your ring months ago but never found a good time to give it to you.

what time could be better to propose than the night your girlfriend is escaping from her parents without as much as a note to say goodbye?

you said yes, of course; there's nothing you'd rather do than spend the rest of your life with him. he had hoped for that answer, but he had not expected you to suggest getting married right away. but here and now, nothing feels more right.

maybe the wedding itself isn't that big of a deal, but you both know your feelings are.

"i always expected them to be here, you know?"

your voice breaks the thickening silence that's filled the room since the family in the corner left. you rest your head on jak's shoulder and he hums, a sign for you to go on.

"like, not actually here, but... at my wedding." you intertwine your fingers with his, unable to suppress your sigh. "in some twisted way, i assumed we would have gotten better by then, and that they would want to be here."

despite everything that's happened, you can't blame your parents too much. you get it, you really do; they wanted a certain life for you. a good life, one where they had gotten to plan out every little detail with great care.

unfortunately, that wasn't the life you wanted for yourself.

they gave up so much to move to the america they had seen in the movies; the home of the brave, the land of the free. not the america that would surely but slowly tear their family apart, if even just by giving their daughter a small taste of freedom.

that intoxicating drug. even a tiny bit was enough to make you realize how free you can be, and how stupid you would be to want anything else.

"maybe... one day, they will want to be here," jak answers, turning his head to let his lips meet the top of your head. "then we could have a ceremony with them."

that silence from before appears again, but for some reason, your heart flutters at the meaning behind the words. "you sure have good imagination, crawford."

someone calls out your names, and the sound of your parents' surname already stings a bit. jak has been calling you "mrs. crawford" for half a day now, so anything else already sounds unnatural.

and maybe because in reality, you've always been, and always will be, mrs. crawford.

you both rise to your feet and walk hand-in-hand into your new life.

the start of forever.

"neither of us had a lot of time to write these vows, but... here we go... this ring around my finger... it could just as well be made of paper or string. its true worth doesn't lie in its material, but in the love it represents. i would still wear it until i die, just like i will be by your side until i give in to death. you've always been mine, and now what's mine is yours. i offer you everything i am. our relationship may not fit into the conventional molds or follow the traditional paths, but it's ours, and i wouldn't change a single moment of our journey together."

[upinthecloudss]

HC Time!

saw a picture with the person's hc's of how people sat in the class and got inspired-

i've been having brainrot over mcl these past few weeks so here you go - a product of a semi lifelong obsession.

also these are spanish names so Karla = capuccine

I know that Farres' class is a free seating kind of thing, but I HC that they eventually fell into this arrangement by their last year of high school - i feel that beemoov could've juiced out more slice of life stuff with the class so here i am

lowk i get this from hints from dialogues but these r my personal hc's of how classes would be at Sweet Amoris' Class F (F for Farres, not the grades they get lmao) - ignore the a in the pic i had a brain fart and i'm too lazy to change it

i yap so beware under the cut

Class F

they share all classes in the same room except for science, arts and pe so this is them in their natural environment

the people in the first row kinda keep to themselves

its the last two which initiate most of the banter (ie the twins mostly) BUT others tend to join in most of the time.

the first row is the most 'serious' about their studies

genuinely the 'problem' class of the school - it's either peggy trying to camouflage herself with the couch in the teachers room, nath and castiel on the verge of killing each other, amber, alexy and rosa's costume fiasco, and CANDY capitalised bcus she's genuinely involved in everyone's life at some point (chismosavirus i love her)

they don't all get along in a 'family' sense, but they did grow familiar with each other over the years and there are some very close friendgroups in their class

when they need to, they definitely can unite (they even convinced amber, li and charlotte to help with the bunnies, which was insane to me)

ik that they are all ver cliche-ish characters, but mcl surpisingly made them work very well together

Farres

teaches geography & history but is also Candy's class homeroom teacher

ppl tend to walk all over him which is something he cannot avoid with students in any of his classes

loser man he's v funny to me

if nath or melody are not in class and he asks a question there is always a 10 second long silence AT LEAST

trying his best bless his heart

i hc that the class gave him a goodbye gift of sorts after graduating, thanking him for his patience with their insane antics

maybe something like them naming a bunny in lysander's family farm after him or something as bizzare like that - call back to the time they almost got him fired in ep 18 with the bunnies they let out

All these hc's are about them in the class environment, but there is sm more i have in my back pocket

Nath

his dad's pressure to excel in school is obv influenced him sitting first row

even after gaining his independence, we still see him become valedictorian on ep 39 (?) or 40 i forgot so i assume that he started being more relaxed about his studies AFTER hsl

that's why he usually stays in that seat for most of his hsl

imo best seat in the class if you want to pay attention - close to the teacher but also right in front of the whiteboard

not a teachers pet, but castiel likes to use his choice of seat in a free seating class as an opportunity to call him one lmao

doesn't really care about who sits next to him, choice of seat was solely out of the need to keep up with his father's standards

doesn't mind sitting next to melody, even if he feels a bit overwhelmed by her constant attention, bcus he knows that she's also a diligent student

doesn't answer every question, but tends to raise his hand more than once every class

straight a's - we all know this

doesn't interrupt classes if it's not school-related - so don't expect him to be adding onto any banter that may go on during class time (unless it's castiel provoking him, but he only tends to speak up after his independence from his parents in ep 23)

ppl don't tend to listen to him when he asks for silence in the class (when farres is also unable to shut ppl up prior LMAO)

some ppl tend to find him annoying - too perfect for their liking - but after the whole ordeal with his dad people cut him some slack and realise that their annoyance prolly came from jealousy

sm angst material but let's move on

Melody

(apologies if i'm too mean to her,,, i dont love her character and it's not even about the nath possesiveness, more on that in another post if i feel like it :p)

this simp would have sat on mud in a heartbeat if it meant sitting next to nath

i always hc'd that, even though she is a good student, having a crush on nath actually drove her to be even better as a way to impress him

so, she chose to sit first row mainly bcus she is a good student, but deep down (or not that deep down lmao) knowing that she could've chose any of the other chairs in the row, it's obvious why she chose that specific seat out of any other

since she sits closest to Mr Farres out of everyone and shes also class rep, she's usually the one to hand out worksheets or go on errands for teachers (given that it's not an important job that fits nathaniel's role better)

ACTUAL teachers pet - it kind of annoys most in the class (even irks nath at some points lmao) bcus she always seems to eager to prove herself in a super obnoxious way

straight a's but is the type of whiny girl to be upset at anything less than an a (i get her)

looks down on ppl that don't get good grades and is kinda condescending (i don't relate there)

type of girl to SHHHH people loudly even if they're literally whispering

candy and rosa are big victims of this given that they are (1) chismosas by nature (2) sit right behind her

her attitude doesn't really change throughout school life

if you are nath route i imagine she absolutely stares daggers at us or anyone else when nath sits next to them in class

Lysander

before you pull out the pitchforks telling me about lys and castiel being besties - this doesn't mean that they have to sit together in class

hear me out

lysander is more serious about his studies, even if he is quiet he is a diligent student.

nath actually respects and kinda resents him for this, you can see that he doesn't have the pressure to be a good student that nath has but he still tries his best and does very well in class (straight low a's / high b's student imo)

angst hc's another time i swear

best classes/ones he enjoys the most are lit and history

castiel tends to call him a nerd, lovingly, opposed to how he does it to nath

doesn't participate much in class, but when he does it's usually to give correct answers when the class seems to draw on a blank

or bcus he is asked directly by Farres, lmao

before priya came in their second to last year of high school (my hc timeline but idk) lysander sat alone in the table so castiel would go over and sit next to him if he felt like spending more time with his best friend every now and then

he tends to enjoy his peace, so doesn't mind sitting alone

gets along well with priya when they sit together, but they tend to sit in comfortable silence

doesn't write much of his personal writing during class, he learnt that people tend to be way too curious and try to take a peek

or ask him to read it aloud to the rest of the class - that one lit class was a living hell for him

tends to daydream in class if he's tired

Priya

my beloved,,,, they will never make me hate you

came in last of everyone in the class so she took the only remaining seat

is still a beast in studies so it doesn't matter where she sits - will get straight a's anyway

except for art lmao

type of student melody wishes she were

effortlessly smart - and when she gives answers she's not overly snobbish

shes so ,,,, marry me

who said that

is up to sitting next to anyone that isn't amber's witch crowd - but if she ends up near them she doesn't hesistate to put them in their place

offers to switch places with friends that may be struggling more with classes and sit in rows behind her- she knows that sitting closer to the front will force people to focus more (it's usually kim or candy who get these offers from priya, bcus she knows that they have the potential and priya hates seeing them fall behind - and candy yaps too much with rosa sometimes)

she's always looking out for people, helping with violette and kim in maths with difficult exercises etcetc

i see her calling out an answer umprompted if she sees that the person that the teacher asked to has no idea - if she likes the person ofc

Delanay: what is a mitochondria?

candy: uhhhhhh

priya: POWERHOUSE OF -

ik that answer is wrong shut up

doesn't give two shits about being a 'model' student, she is interested in learning so that makes her a good student by default

loves history - political side of it even more, and can go on long tangents on all the 'underdogs' of history and on giving a voice to the less fortunate

cannot stand when people blame teachers when its their own incompetence in a subject

e.g will get so angry when Li complains about 'how she was supposed to know that europe is not a country if farres never told them' in an exam on the european union

gets mostly a's, some b's big fat d's in art im afraid tho

she knows the struggles of teachers given that her mother teaches elementary students so isn't ever really too disrespectful (with limits, she sometimes joins in on banter)

Kim

has a lot of potential, but tends to be demotivated when she compares herself with the 'smart' people

what she doesn't realise is that she could be as 'smart' as them if she also put in the same effort as them

she does let her grades slip at some point, but she never does so deliberately

complicated history with studying, i forgot if it was her mom who dropped studying when she was her age and then went back to it once kim was in high school (mentioned in the ep with iris' party), but tries her best to not let down her parents

sat next to violette who was too scared to sit on the same row as amber and company, but wouldn't have minded sitting further back

you will never catch her dead getting herself involved in class

during her time being tutored by nath, he challenged her to answer a question in class

he called her a coward, basically, so she did it ONCE to defend her honour

but then once became a few times as she became more confident with her abilities

graduated with b's, even a stray a in the mix

would never admit it but she's very thankful for nath and candy's help and appreciates the supportiveness from her friends + family to not quit on trying in school

if you look at her during class, you will know exactly what she is thinking about - it's all on her face

doesn't understand class? furrowed brows, pout and frustrated mumbling while she scratches away at her page

is annoyed at amber's stupid remarks? rolls her eyes to the back of her head so hard

got a good grade? her eyes sparkle just a little bit, "no violette what are you talking about i just got some dust in my eye-"

overall wins the idgaf war i love her

Violette

so debilitatingly shy bless her heart

will NEVER open her mouth in class

if she is asked to answer kim will jump to answer umprompted, a la priya

"sorry sir i thought you were asking me"

"is your name violette?"

all of her notes have a new 'doodle' in the margins

but the doodles are like

masterpieces

mostly portraits of her friends, kim and alexy taking the spotlight

as well as her dad

and maybe her mom? but she tends to get emotional so she reserves those drawing for outside the classroom

karla tried to pick on her one time for drawing in class and kim scared her into not messing with anyone for a whole week, and violette ever again

people are so supportive when she actually makes an attempt to speak, even castiel knows to shut up with his sarcastic remarks

but then the silence freaks her out and next time u will hear her will be in 2 business years at least

or karla laughs at her stuttering or something (looking for amber's approval) but that happens only once thanks to kim

amber and her friends don't pick on her much, simply because they prefer to go for girls that they are jealous of and she never draws their attention

Rosa

is the type of student to have 1000s of excused absences

leigh signs her permission slips and stuff and since the headmistress can't be arsed to do her job properly she gets away with it lmao

actually gets by well with exams

she already has a dream to move onto the fashion industry so she isn't too worried about her grades

chismosavirus #1 she will always be the first to be called out by teachers for trying to gossip in class

she's always super offended by the scolding even though its 100% true

"i was literally whispering!! besides, your date with [crush] is way more important than trigonometry"

"we had a map of asia on the whiteboard, rosa"

candy always has to stop rosa from strangling amber and co. everytime they pick on her best friend

"it's not worth it rosa"

"you are way too nice, if i were you they would be dead in a ditch by now"

"what?"

"what?"

does people's makeup or gives tips during homeroom if they ask her to

she loves it

or sometimes candy's hair during class

"this is not a beauty salon girls"

does it anyway

Candy

depends on the player ofc, but she's obviously shown to have high capacities in school if she applies herself - so her grades are entirely up to her

theoretically sits next to rosa, but since her best friend doesn't come to school too often people sit next to her if they feel like it (like our route or alexy hehe)

chismosavirus #2 bcus rosa infected her and also that how she is by nature

doesn't cause many problems in class, and only includes herself in the banter of the class if she is directly dragged into it by the back rows.

sits in front of the witch crowd and is sadly a victim of their annoying teasing

i love her but she cannot defend herself for the first 30 episodes of the series i swear

she does sit in front of charlotte, who is the 'chillest' of the trio so she usually gets peace in class if they feel like ignoring her

besides, she REFUSES to change seats because of them - she would never give them the satisfaction

Iris

the backbone of the class for sure

is surprisingly good friends with castiel so she's the designated 'peacemaker' if its a small thing (not if theyre literally about to punch each other, she's not suicidal)

and also gets along well enough with most people fine enough

"if someone is acting mean it's probably a mistake" my girl is too good for this world

genuinely tries her best but is lost in class like, 80% of the time

barely passes her exams but she passed so you go queen

she's not like, stupid, but school is not the path for her

laughs at stupid jokes that the more extroverted people make in the middle of class, but isn't usually the one to start anything in class

participates if asked to

doesn't mean she gets the questions right

isn't picky about who she sits with, was the only one who was willing to sit next to karla

so that's where she ended up

Karla

so she obv chose to sit next to amber's friend group, even though its obvious she's not really a part of their group

ALWAYS acting out to bully anyone as a way to 'prove' herelf to them

people tend to ignore her, like flat out

she's so forgettable that teachers even forget to rlly punish her for any out of line comments

actually good at school, but hides it as much as she can

because of this, and other things, charlotte respects her the least - shes basically dragging herself across the floor for their approval

plain annoying but forgettable

never really makes good friends with anyone - comes close to it with melody (but them both have self esteem problems and make it everyone else's problem, so ig that's why they get along better than others) and iris but because shes enemy to no one

Charlotte

most 'quiet' of the witches trio but doesn't mean she's not as cruel outside of the classroom

gets respectably high grades, but could get much better if she tried

also strong contender of the idgaf war

but you can never really tell what she's thinking of people when they speak in class

or at any point

keeps to herself and her friends but loves to jump at the opportunity to be mean to candy by whispering shit to her

is the more indirect type of cruel, will give karla the silent treatment, literally does not acknowledge her ever

she hasn't stuck gum to candy's hair by now because of rosa's presence, she's annoyingly perceptive,,,

when she leaves school Li takes her place

outright refuses to answer any question that farres asks her

"ms charlotte! would you mind sharing your answer with the rest of the class? it was exceptionally well written"

"i would mind, yes"

sat there bcus amber sat there

Amber

she is so annoying god bless castiel's soul

sat in front of him as "an infallible flirting tactic"

"trust me Li - doing it in the long run will have him at my feet by next month tops"

is the type of girl to throw her hair on top of the table behind her

castiel tried to cut it once in retaliation once he saw that she wouldn't get the hint when he pulled on it anytime she did it

"he was too shy to try to braid my hair, i'm subtly giving him chances to make him go crazy for me. trust me li trust me."

literally only sat there to try to get with castiel

he couldn't give less of a shit, is incredibly annoyed by her

and chooses to ignore her

has barely passing grades, but she lies about it to her parents

besides, they tend to pay more attention to nath's results

"what can i say, i'm just daddy's little girl"

... moving on

always sprays 2000 spritzes of perfume and chokes armin because she does it in his direction

"AMBER i'm going to die from asphyxia if you keep spraying that shit liquid on me"

"MR KEENAN LANGUAGE"

"i didn't know you knew what the word asphyxia meant bro"

"shut up alexy"

always has the most stupid things to say

it has candy sighing loudly

"SIR CANDY IS TELLING ME TO SHUT UP"

"I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING"

"YOU THOUGHT OF IT"

"WE ALL DID"

outright annoying

tends to insult candy, armin, alexy, and kentin the most but her preffered pick will always be candy

Li

genuinely stupid holy shit

"europe is a very big country"

surprised she didn't fail her final exams

insisted on sitting next to amber but since there were no more tables she just pulled a chair next to her

farres tried to make her move but she ignored him lmao

if it's a more strict teacher she moves next to lysander before priya came in

after that she used the excuse that there is no other seats to stay there

took charlotte's seat when she left

out of the three, makes the stupidest remarks

doesn't initiate the bullying, but its always her just repeating anything that amber or charlotte say like a parrot

literally bird brain

not much to say, doesn't involve herself in class

mostly looks at herself in the mirror during class or browses high end clothing stores online

loaded asf so has convinced herself that grades don't matter

will be the death of her parents one day

Alexy

came in after most people and wanted to sit near his brother so they sat at the back where there were three seats available

armin sat next to castiel because he was more 'covered' by the three girls in the table in front of him to play his console

so alexy ended up sitting alone in the table next to armin for a little until kentin showed up

lowk a blessing for him bcus we all know he was defo into him

always one of the most talkative, or to join in on jokes that his brother screams out in the middle of class

not a class clown, but usually the one to start interruptions in class

he doesn't even intend to interrupt, but he likes 'commentating' on what is going on - his words

okay at studies, is indifferent to his grades and has no pressure to do well by his parents

this seating arrangement was the cause of him becoming closer to kentin - even if they never became anything that alexy would've wanted to, he appreciates their time spent together

teases kentin in class alongside his twin

peak 'people in the back row' meme type shi

brings snacks to share with the back row

armin, alexy (and kentin even if he likes to complain) are usually messing around a whole lot but tend to go unnoticed

Armin

sat at the covered seat next to castiel so that his teachers let him play his games in peace

type of person to put his console behind an upside down book

has a surprisingly peaceful coexistence with his table buddy

castiel hates that he calls him irl table moot

catch him playing on his console 90% of the time - the 10% is Delanay's classes

calms down with it over the years but never abandons his gaming

he's gets frustratingly high grades considering the little attention he pays in any of his classes

speaks in brainrot

can't stop himself from spouting out the most chronically online shit in class

it's so strange one would think he is playing videogames and not paying attention and then will just

"can someone tell me what is the name of the city that is being covered by my finger right now?" "LMAO KID NAMED FINGER"

all while having his eyes glued to the screen of his PSP

only candy sometimes laughs if shes his route bcus she's equally as nerdy

if not it is met with the most awkard silence

he's so unfunny bless him

everyone but alexy question his sanity but eventually get used to it

likes to have 'back row basketball' competitions with his brother (and kentin, who they always manage to pull at least one attempt out of him) where the first person to get a piece of paper into the bin next to mr farres' table wins

mr farres has given up on trying to stop them

he's just used to flying balls of paper whooshing past his head

atp who cares, as long as they don't hit him

or they also try to see whoever manages to land a spitball on amber's head without her noticing for the remainder of the class

castiel likes to join in on that one

Kentin

came in a bit after the twins so had limited seat choices

didn't really feel like sitting first row with lysander and also wanted to have candy in his line of sight so he went for the seat next to alexy at the back

says he regrets it sm because the 'twins are so annoying' but never made an attempt to change seats

"oh kennykins~ when will you ever let me give you a style change from those horrible military style pants??"

"you can't escape from my brother on a fashion mission kenny"

"IT'S KENTIN i can´t stand the two of you"

also okay at his studies, his dad only cares about his results in p.e tbh (angst material again but ill ramble in another post)

is kinda iffy aboout sitting in the same row as castiel but will never admit it

besides the twins are like a buffer zone so it's okay

doesn't stop castiel from laughing at them bullying teasing him

kentin gets so defensive bless him

"WHAT DID YOU SAY- SAY THAT AGAIN IF YOU DARE"

"KENTIN GO OUT TO THE CORRIDOR RIGHT NOW AND CALM YOURSELF DOWN"

and it was just castiel releasing air through his nose to laugh

he pretends he hates the back row but he has to admit that he has the most fun there

made his best friends there literally (not castiel tho sorry king)

and its kinda a release from the expectations to be a 'man' from his dad and just to be silly with his friends

and now im getting angsty lets move on

if candy is kentin route and he sits with her some time,,,, oh lord

when he goes to sit at the back row the next day he is received as some kind of cheating husband coming back to his unstable wife

"so i see you finally got bored of us"

"its okay kennykins *sniff* we understand that we will never be her"

"you are breaking our hearts and you don't even seem to care"

"the betrayal,,, how can you even come back after all that you have done?"

this continues on for the rest of the day until kentin agrees to buy them lunch

Castiel

does not give af

bad boy cliche - sits at the back, feet on the table and doesn't write down a single line of writing if he can

chose to sit at the back simply because he doesn't care for classes

finds armin entertaining, even if he calls him 'irl table moot' and generally doesn't really understand any of his jokes

does find the twins´ jokes funny if its them making fun of kentin

also doesn't care for kentin being scared of him or trying to pick a fight in class

is on the verge of strangling amber anytime she tries her weird ass flirting on him

him being salutatorian at graduation is so funny to me because he proved that all that his teachers gave him shit for "because you will never get passing grades with your behaviour" and here he is

only time he contributes to class is to throw snarky remarks at people - mostly nath ofc

sarcastic man apocalypse and he is their king

will sit next to lys if he feels like it sometimes but he is mostly allergic to breathing the same air as 'first row smarty mcfuck boy" (one of his many loving nicknames to nath <3)

[seenoversundown]

For Death Or Glory : Chapter Eighteen

Jake Kiszka x Charlotte (Fem OC)

Warnings: Some vague spiritual mentions, VERY LIGHT spooky theme, yearning, pining (can you tell it's a jake chapter?) anxious themes, slightly tense conversation? (not an argument don't worry) fluff fluff fluff fluff, may cause butterflies, a lot of physical touch type of affection, and certainly important: Jake is the definition of 'if he wanted to, he would.'

Word Count: 6k 🤭 (couldn't stop yapping this chapter)

Summary: Jake has a cute little surprise for Charlotte, which is why he insisted on her spending the night.

Author's Note: FOLKS- this one is fucking cute. The words just kept flowing and I think we're at a point in the story where this is going to be a trend. (We're in the home stretch, which makes me want to cry, but also-there's just so much to say in the chapters, that I don't foresee them getting much shorter from here on out!) I can't wait to see how you feel at the end 🤭 ((I'm sorry in advance, don't yell at me))

Crystal - Stevie Nicks "Like the love that had finally, finally found me, Then I knew, In the crystalline knowledge of you."

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God, it’s early. 

I managed to carefully slide out of bed without her waking up, which was already difficult because I wanted nothing more than just to stay curled up around her. But I need to be awake for a little bit before I surprise her today.

She told me when she was upset that her best friend and she had a tradition of going to Salem for her birthday every year. She wasn’t super into the spiritual side of things, but she loves Halloween, and with her birthday only being a few days before, she’s a bit biased. 

Unfortunately, this year, they never made it, and my heart shattered watching her tell me that the funeral was just a week prior to her birthday. I’ve never wanted just to squeeze someone harder than her at that moment.  When I had gone and talked to Josh, I had asked if he minded covering the bar that night because she was so upset and I didn’t have the heart to just.. let her be alone after that. But I told him that I would stop by the bar before I came home so I could talk to him about today. Thankfully, he was happy to take care of everything for the day, with the help of Danny. 

I sip on coffee as I figure out what I’m going to wear for the day, assuming that she will probably look nicer than my typical outfits. I know it doesn’t really matter what I’m wearing, but I want to make sure she has a good day and that I can manage not to look homeless sometimes. 

Grabbing a few things from my closet quietly, I sneak back out of my room so she can sleep for as long as possible. I drop them on the couch, deciding to really just go for it today. 

I pull my hair back into a bun, stealing a little more of Josh’s shaving cream, it’s not super grown in, but I may as well. Taking the time to make sure my face is clean-shaven before waking her. Remembering the fact she said I looked cute on Facetime after I shaved reluctantly, but if this is what she prefers, then I don’t mind.  ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

I sit on the bed next to her, just watching her sleep for a minute. She’s curled up with my pillow, which she must have stolen when I left the room. I don’t want to wake her up; she looks so comfortable. 

Softly, I run my hand down the back of her head, and she doesn’t flinch at all. I gently scratched her back, hoping that the contact would help, but still, she didn’t budge. 

I lean down, kissing her temple and then whispering. “Hey you,” into her. Pressing slow, soft kisses into the side of her face. 

“Mmm..” her sleepy little groan made me laugh. 

Peppering a few more kisses against her cheek, mumbling, “Goodmorning.”

It takes her a minute, but she finally opens her eyes slightly and looks up at me. 

I whisper, “There she is.” 

“Why are you up?” She mumbles, reaching her arms out to me. Wrapping her up in a hug, she tucks her little face into me. Maybe we can just stay like this instead. 

“You should get dressed and come with me. I have a few things I need to do,” I tell her, hoping she’ll not fight it. 

“How dressed are we talking?” 

I sit up a little to look at her, “Um.. we’ll be like.. in public.. Does that help?” 

She touches my face, ignoring my answer, “Did you just shave?” 

“Mhm,” I respond, choking back a laugh. “Come on, sleeping beauty, don’t get distracted.” 

”Your face is soft,” she says quietly, as she’s running her hand down my cheek and holding my chin. 

“Just for you,” I giggle before leaning down and kissing her. “I have coffee for you, too.” 

“What are you up to?” She squints at me; there’s no way she’s figured it out already. 

My eyebrows pull together, “What do you mean?” 

“You’re being extra sweet this morning..” her voice trailing off. 

“Am I not allowed to be nice to you?” I laugh. “I can be mean if you’d prefer.”

She laughed with me this time, “I can’t even imagine that.” 

“I don’t think I could be mean to you if I tried.” I would never. ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

While she’s getting herself together, I pull on the outfit I had picked out earlier. Cuffing the bottom of my pants so they sit nicely with the boots I’m about to grab. Am I hoping that she’ll think I look nice? Maybe. Opening the drawer of my nightstand, the few rings that I have and my watch sit there. I slide on one of the rings and decide to actually wear my watch today. Staring at myself in the mirror, I feel like I look kind of put together? I don’t think I could tell you the last time I tried this hard with an outfit. 

I’m sitting on the couch, just scrolling through emails, when I hear her walking out of the bathroom. I glance up from my phone as she walks over to me. 

Her voice was so low when she finally let out, “Okay, I’m ready.”

I take her in, her sweater tucked into a little plaid skirt, leaving her legs on display even if they’re covered by black tights. Even with a coat over it, she looks so good. I just quietly stand up, still looking at her but unable to form words. 

“Oh,” she squeaks, looking me up and down. “You look cute.” 

“Hah, thank you,” I can’t shake the nerves from my voice when I say it. “You–” I hesitate, not even knowing how to compliment her at the moment. 

“I’m what?” 

“You just look,” I start, glancing down at her again. “Wow.” 

She giggles at me as I struggle to find words, “Stop it!” 

I shake my head as if it’ll help me refocus. I wasn’t prepared for her to be able to look like this on a whim. 

“Alright, you, let’s go.”  ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

Once we’re in the car, I hand her my phone, letting her pick whatever for music. I had already put an address into my maps, just to at least get me to Salem– assuming that she would have something picked out by the time we got there. We hardly make it to the turnpike before I feel her staring at me. 

“Jacob,” she pauses, “Where are we going?”

“Well,” I glanced over at her for a second. “You said you always went to Salem around your birthday and that you hadn’t gone this year because of everything going on so..” 

“Wait- really?” Her voice was small. 

I reach over, resting my hand on her thigh, “Mhm. I figured it’s not fair for you not to do anything for your birthday, and I’m sure you already know some things you like to do there.” 

She leans over the center console, kissing my cheek a few times before letting a small “thank you” squeak out. 

“Of course,” I can feel my face warm, squeezing her leg a few times.  Her hand holds my forearm gently, and the little bit of contact gives me butterflies. 

“I’m assuming you’ve been to Salem?”

“Not in a long time, so whatever you want to do will basically be new to me.” Her eyes light up, and she quickly grabs her phone. 

She’s quiet for a few minutes, just buried in her phone until she holds it out in front of me, “Loook! We could do this!”  I pull it closer so I can actually see; it’s a video of people getting their aura photos done. 

“We can, if you want,” I tell her. 

She’s precious; the way her face lights up when she’s excited makes me want to just give her everything and anything she wants. 

She spent a lot of the drive there finding little things that we could do and excitedly telling me about them. Even if I had to keep reassuring her that whatever she chose was fine. I don’t think she’s used to people doing things for her.  ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

Her voice is quiet when she asks, “Can we get coffee?” as if she thinks I’ll say no.

“Mhm,” I hum back. “Just pick where from.” The way she gets shy asking for things makes me laugh to myself. 

“Are you sure?” 

“Mhmm,” I giggle, looking over at her. “Whatever you want, Char.” 

After finding the one she had decided on, I listened to her try and decide which drink she wanted to try; the way she was tied between the two made me laugh.

“Whichever one you get, I’ll get the other one,” I whisper to her. 

Her head whips over, “Oh, you don’t have to do that.” 

“I don’t mind,” 

We finally move up to order; I make her go first so I can order the other drink she didn’t pick. Avoiding looking at her when I could almost feel the wind from how fast she snapped her neck to look at me. I pull out my wallet and quickly pay as her jaw slacks open, staring at me. 

“What?” 

“You just-” 

My eyebrows raise as she hesitates, “Don’t worry about it.”

“Well,” her voice is low, looking at the ground for a second. “Thank you.” 

“Of course,” I tell her, grabbing her hand and pulling her over to a table. “I’ll go grab the drinks; make yourself comfortable.”

I pull out my phone while I wait for our drinks to be made. Clicking on the app for our cameras, which I honestly don’t really look at often. I can just look real quick, so I don’t have to bug them. 

Switching between the few, everything seems normal, but I still feel compelled to check my texts. Nothing. 

Me: hey, if you need anything just let me know okay? 

Me: Also, daniel will be there around like 4pm so you won’t have to close alone

Josh: i know! don’t worry about us just go have fun with your lady! 

‘Jake’ gets called, and it pulls me out of my phone. I grab our drinks and wander back over to the table. Her hands reach out as soon as I get close to her; she’s almost vibrating with excitement over it. 

She sips on her drink, letting out little ‘mmm’s as she does. It’s unfair how adorable she is. Thankful that the drink I chose wasn’t terrible, I finally tried it, realizing that she had her eyes locked on me. 

“Here,” I hand her my drink, her eyes lighting up as she takes it from me. The fact she didn’t hesitate to sip on it gives me butterflies. You would think I’d never kissed her with the way my body reacts to basic things she does. 

Josh: do we have more downeast somewhere or is this it 

Josh: it’s not urgent just whenever you get a second 

Mel: do you want me to go in at all? I can just help out if you don’t want me to make drinks. 

‘Motion Detected’  notifications from Josh opening the bar sit on my lock screen. 

“Hey,” she says, bringing me back to reality. Her hand reaching up and tapping in between my eyebrows lightly, “What’s going on?” 

“Just have a bunch of texts from Josh about the bar,” I tell her, trying not to let my eyebrows pull back together. 

Her eyes look between mine as we sit there, “Everything is going to be fine. Danny won’t let the bar burn down.”

“You’re right. I’m sorry,” I tell her, sliding my phone into my pocket. “Where would you like to go first?”

“Do you want to see some of the witch trial sites?” She asks.  “Or is it too spooky for you?” Followed with a slight giggle as she looked at me. 

“Oh, don’t start with me,” I laugh before deciding to tease her back. “I’ll hold your hand if you get too scared, though.”  ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

I can tell she really enjoys it here because she can just glance at her maps and then know where to wander off to. She really seems in her element getting to bring me to all these sites. Almost makes me wonder if this is what they would do every year. Telling me about everything that happened in each of the spots. She made sure to point out little details that she really enjoyed. 

My phone has vibrated a few times, and I’m genuinely fighting demons, trying not to look at what it is. Everything is fine. Dan is there. It’s okay. I spend a minute trying to shake the thought and refocus on her as we walk through a little bit of the cemetery. 

“Not too scared yet, are you?” she taunts. 

A slight grin sneaks onto my face, “And what if I was?” 

“Oooohhh, poor baby,” she teases me further, her hand running over my cheek. I know she’s trying to be funny, but hearing her call me ‘baby’ makes my knees weak. The way her lips pouted when she said it also made me wish I could just kiss her freely. 

“I offer to hold your hand, and you just make fun of me?” I let out dramatically. “I see how it is.” Hearing her laugh is worth having to be a bit dramatic. I pout my lip out at her as she giggles at me. 

“I’d take it back,” She starts. “But, you’re cute when you do this.” She taps my bottom lip gently, and I can’t stop the grin that forms when she does. Maybe I am scared. 

“Where else do you want to show me? Or are we just trying to pick up some spirits to bring home with us?” 

She finds a few that she hadn’t been to in a while, leading the way. I would gladly follow her around even if she were lying to me about every single thing. She kept touching my arm when she would tell me things, and it was taking everything in me to stay calm about it. It’s not that deep, Jake. Chill out. I try to tell myself, and then she tells me the history of the next place, and her hand lingers on my bicep for a minute, which makes all the hair on my body stand. 

I can feel my phone vibrating in my pocket as we walk to another spot that she’s excited about. It’s not important. They have everything under control. I try to ignore the feeling and focus on her. But the incessant vibration against my leg is making it difficult. 

Bzzt.

Bzzt.

Bzzt.

For fucks sake, what could be happening? 

I pull out my phone for what feels like the thousandth time, seeing a handful of notifications sitting there. 

Josh: imagine I just get super drunk because it’s slow!! 

Josh: i’m so kidding 

Josh: or am I? the world will never know.

Danny: Please just ignore Josh. He’s cackling like a witch behind the bar so I know he’s being a little shit. 

Josh (in the Caravel Chat) : Hear me out- We just close early today for fun!

Sam: why is josh asking me to come help him lol 

Quinn: Did you leave Josh alone at the bar? 

Danny: Everything is fine I swear.

Sam: actually if you pay me for the night, i’ll do it 

Staring at all the texts that have come in, I can’t fight the way my hand rubs over my face. As I’m trying to decide what to respond to first, I feel her hand grab my arm. 

“Babe,” she says, squeezing me gently. My heart is simultaneously pounding at her casual pet name but also aches at the look on her face. Get off your phone, you dumbass. 

Locking my phone and shoving it into my pocket, I look back at her, “I’m so sorry.”

She gently grabs my chin, forcing me to look at her, “I think it’s wonderful how much you care about your job, but they can handle it.” 

“No, no, you’re right. I’m still sorry, and I promise I’ll stop,” comes out a bit sadder sounding than I expected. She leans up, placing a kiss on my cheek. 

“It’s okay,” she says quietly, “I just want you to have fun too.” 

“I am,” I whisper. “Come on, the aura photos are calling our names.”

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

I pull open the door to the little shop that offers the photos, letting her excitedly go in first. She doesn’t go far, just waiting for me to come in with her. There’s someone already talking to the girl working there, so we just wander around looking at the selection of crystals and stones they have. She’s kept herself close to me while I pick up random crystals to look at them closer. Is she nervous? She has such a strong personality when it comes to her job, which I know is part of the gig for her, but it’s interesting to see how she acts when she doesn’t have to be in charge. The fact she has been attached to me from the moment we walked in is throwing me off. 

Hearing the door chimes ring, the girl behind the counter glances over at us. 

“Hi! Did you have any questions?” her voice was bubbly. 

I feel her gently tap my arm, seeing her stare at me from the corner of my eye. I have to fight the laugh when I realize she wants me to ask.

“Actually, yes,” I start. “Is there any chance we can get our aura photos done?” 

“Oh, absolutely!” She says. “Did you want individual ones?” 

“Please,” I tell her. “If you have time, obviously.” 

She laughs boisterously, “Lucky for the two of you– after Halloween, we die off so quickly! I have so much time; I don’t know what to do with myself.” 

She brings us to the area they have set up, explaining the process and how it works before having Charlotte sit down first. She’s so graceful as she gets situated. So, she carefully made sure her hands were in the right place after adjusting her hair a few times. The girl working here was so friendly and was talking her through it to help make sure that she was relaxed, so she got an authentic reading. 

I don’t know what it is about her that is so incredibly captivating, but the entire time, I can’t look away from her. I stand far enough out of the way that she can’t see me, but all I can think is– she is effortlessly beautiful. The feeling I get when I look at her scares me; my heart races, and the way my stomach turns. The witch trial sites could never compare. 

It only takes a few minutes before we’re swapping spots. She, on the other hand, stays within eyeshot for me. Doing everything I can to focus on the employee and not her, I feel myself calm down a bit. The girl leans down to take the photo, and I can see Charlotte in my peripheral. With the soft smile on her face, as she watches, I find myself unable to hold back the full smile as I hear the shutter of the camera.

“If you want, I can give you guys a little explanation of what your colors mean!” The girl offers, and we have the time to kill, so we obviously take her up on the offer. 

  We follow her back up to the counter, where she slides both of our photos over to us. My eyes go to her right away; our colors are not the same at all. 

“Ladies first,” the girl says, nudging Char’s photo forward a bit. “You have quite a bit of red in here, dear. Red typically represents a passionate, intense, loyal person. Depending on the shade of red, it can also have some romantic representations as well.” 

I glance over as Charlotte is just beaming at this girl while she explains. “You also have a little bit of a deeper purple in there, which means you may have something that is bothering you. Some sort of obstacle that you need to overcome.” 

Oh no. My hand finds hers, lightly tapping just to let her know I’m still there. She so softly wraps her hand around my index finger, squeezing a few times, almost like a ‘thank you.’

“And now for you,” the girl taps my photo forward. “You have majority green, which is usually characterized by the person’s nurturing disposition. You embody compassion and understanding. Since yours is also more of a mint green, you must be someone who just radiates peace and serenity to those around you.”

Charlotte’s soft laugh, “Sounds about right.”

“You’re obviously welcome to look up more about the meanings behind the colors! I just figured I would give you a baseline of what they mean,” she tells us.

“No, thank you so much for that, actually,” Charlotte finally chimes in.

The girl chuckles as she runs my card for everything, looking at me as she hands it back, “You know it’s kinda cute; your aura colors complement each other well.” Shooting me a wink as she glances down at the photos. Why is she trying to torture me?

There’s no way my face isn’t a little red at her comment, and then I glance over at her; the subtle pink in her cheeks makes me feel less insane. But is she just embarrassed, or is she into that? 

“Thank you again,” I tell her as we go to leave, pushing the door open for Charlotte to go out first.  ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

“Where to next?” 

Her excitement is palatable, “Oooo, I have an idea!” 

I watch her as she leads me to another little shop that she likes to look through. My heart feels.. different as I watch her. Seeing her get excited over these things that she looks forward to year after year, the way she just beams back at me like I’m the one who founded this town. She keeps holding my hand, and even when she lets go to show me something, she always finds her way back to it. She walks so close that she bumps into me constantly. Okay so.. I have a crush on her.. But how could I not? 

Her sweet face when she turns to me with something that she’s found. I don’t know what’s worse, the soft sparkle in her eyes or trying to focus on anything beyond how perfectly painted her freckles are over her nose. Her little voice every time, ‘Jacob look!’ she would whisper, made me laugh to myself. 

“Do you want it?” I whisper after she’s shown me just about everything in the store. 

And she’s suddenly shy again. 

“No, no, it’s just cute,” she tries to backpedal. 

I take the dainty chain bracelet from her, “It’s very cute.” Inspecting it closer, knowing I’m going to just hold onto it even if she tries to fight me on it. She can’t just show me a million things and think I’m not going to offer to get one of them, at the very least, for her.

I go to set the bracelet back in its place, “Do you want to keep looking around?”

She nods quickly, grabbing my free hand gently. As soon as she turns her head, I pull the bracelet back to me, keeping it tucked in my hand so she doesn’t see it. 

We spent a few more minutes wandering around with her, continuing the same routine of finding something she liked and turning to show me. 

“We can go,” her soft voice rings as we’re walking towards the front. 

I look over at her, fighting the urge to smile, “Give me like two minutes.” 

Walking up to the counter, I hand the bracelet to the employee, knowing there’s no way she isn’t going to notice. Her hand tightened around mine as they dropped the bracelet into a little paper bag, handing it over to me with my receipt. 

Tugging her behind me as we leave, I turn to her, holding out the bag, “For you.” 

“You’re so–” She starts, but pouting her lip when she’s stumped for words. “Thank you, babe.” 

Please just keep calling me that. If I thought her pet naming me woud be bad, I was severely unprepared. 

“Can you help me?” She sweetly asks, holding up the ends of the bracelet to me. 

I grab them from her, and she holds out her wrist for me. Something about the motion of clasping this little chain on her feels like time has slowed. The look on her face, her skin is so soft, and the dainty bracelet looks so perfect on her. I turn it around to see the little charm that’s on it, just holding her wrist for a second. ‘Crush’ may not be the word anymore.   ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

We spent a little while wandering in and out of shops throughout the little street. As we walk further, the iconic Witch House comes into view. A giant black house with three distinct peaks in the roof, it’s hard to miss, but she still points it out to me. 

“Ooooh! We used to take cute pictures in front of it every year.” 

“Are you saying that you want a picture?”

“Maybe,” She grabs my hand, tugging me along with her. She pulls her phone from her bag, and I reach my hand out, thinking that she just wants me to take it. “No, come here.” 

She pulled me close to her and reached out to take a picture of us. She wants.. a picture of the two of us? My arm wraps around her waist gently as she tucks herself into me; she beams at the camera; her smile could light up a room at this moment. 

“You better show off those teeth, Jacob,” she says, making me chuckle to myself. Smiling but looking at her, I can see her clicking the shutter button out of the corner of my eye. 

“Um, do you guys want me to take one for you?” a stranger quietly interjects as they’re passing by. 

“Oooh, yes!” she quickly hands them her phone. Okay, we’re doing this now, haha, that’s so fine. 

She comes back to me, leaning into my side and letting her hand rest on my stomach. Oh, uh.  My arm pulls her into me, and my hand sits on her lower back; I can feel her staring at me, so I glance over. Her lips pulled into the cutest smile; I swear she could feel my heart pounding. Her eyes dropped to my mouth and then back up, making me fully smile at her. 

“Perfect,” she whispers as she looks over at the person, but I don’t want to stop looking at her. I force my head to turn away from her. I looked over to the camera and felt her leaning against me slightly. It takes two seconds before they start walking back over with her phone. She clicks on her camera roll, quickly swiping through them and thanking the person for helping. She turns to me as she looks through them again. 

“Stop, this one’s so cute,” she turns it to me. They caught me looking at her.. We look like a couple; my stomach tenses at the thought. I... Watching as she sends me a bunch of them, taking a second to favorite a couple of them so she doesn’t lose them. “Oh wait, this one too!”  The one moment of her looking at me, her hand sitting on my stomach and full teeth smile on display, looking right at her– my heart flutters at the sight of it. I hadn’t considered how we look together.. from someone else’s point of view. I look like I’m in lo—.

She cuts me off, “Do you want to get some food? I don’t know how late you planned on being here, but at least then, we aren’t starving on the drive home.”

“Um, yeah, we probably should,” I stumble over my words for a second. “Was there somewhere you had in mind?” ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

We wandered around for a bit trying to decide what we wanted. It probably would have gone quicker if we focused and weren’t talking about all the things in the window displays as we passed them. But the way she hardly let go of my hand the entire time, I wasn’t about to stop her from doing whatever it is she wanted. 

We almost walked past the restaurant she decided that she wanted to try, but I think if you looked hard enough, you would have seen the smoke from how fast she hit the brakes when she realized it was next to us. It was a treat for me to see her so.. joyful. 

The server dropping off our drinks and taking our order, we have time to just stare at each other and I listen to her tell me how she’s been looking at this place on instagram for a while. 

I finally ask, “Was this a good surprise at least?” 

“Are you kidding? Of course it was,” she said, leaning forward with a sweet little grin on her lips. 

“I know it’s not the same, but—“ 

She stops me quickly, “If I didn't think she’d hear me, I’d say it might be even better.“ Don’t tell me that. 

“I don’t know about that,” 

“Hey,” she almost scolds me. “It was very sweet of you– no but’s allowed.” 

I giggle at the tone of her voice, knowing she would absolutely yell at me if I kept going. The server dropped off our food quietly as we kept talking about the little things we saw today. She kept asking what I liked most, and I couldn’t be honest because it was just getting to be with her.  She told me about how she and Cass would always try to find new things every year, but they also just enjoyed wandering through the same historical sites because it was just interesting to see. 

“Are you still panicking over the bar?” She asks, scooting her plate away from her. 

It hits me that I’ve been distracted enough that I hadn’t even looked at my phone. 

“Actually.. I hadn’t thought about it,” I tell her. 

She fakes a gasp at me, “Well, look at that.”

“Growing up so fast,” I giggle.  Or it could be the fact I spent the whole day getting to watch a beautiful girl smile at me for bringing her here. 

“Proud of you,” she whispers with her foot grazing my leg. 

She’s absolutely killing me. 

Our server came over with our bill, and I had just held my hand out for the little black folder. I slid my card in without hesitation and handed it back to them. I quietly let out a small ‘Thank you’ as they took the small folder away from me. I look back over to her, and the pink tint to her cheeks is more noticeable than I’m sure she’d like. What is she blushing over? 

“You okay?” 

“Mhm,” she hums back.

“You sure?” 

“Yes,” she laughs. “..just you.” 

The server comes back with the folder, taking my card out. I can feel her stare as she watches me sign the receipt and slide cash into the folder for their tip. I look up at her and softly ask, “You ready?” Letting her lead the way out, my hand found its place on her lower back, trying to keep her close to me. 

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

“It’s so cute here when it’s dark out,” she says as she’s looking at all the shops lit up now that the sun is set. 

I just watch her take everything in, the pure joy on her face, and my heart feels like it’s melting for the hundredth time today. She slides her hand into mine, leaning into my arm and wrapping her free hand over my bicep as we walk. What is she doing? 

“Thank you for everything today,” She squeaks out. 

I look over, placing a kiss on the side of her head, “You’re very welcome.” 

She stops walking, tugging my arm lightly. I turn around to face her when she closes the gap between us. Tilting her head back slightly as she leans into my chest, leaving a few sweet kisses against my lips. 

“I’ve been waiting for that all day,” she mumbles into me. She’s been waiting? I COULD HAVE DONE THAT SOONER?

“I’m sorry, hun,” I mumble back. “I’ll just have to make up for it now.” Earning the biggest smile out of her, making me laugh at how eager she just got. 

“In that case,” she laughs, wiggling herself out of my arms but grabbing my hand instead. “Let’s go, baby!” 

After a lovely little walk filled with giggles and a few more pit stops that she insisted on just to give me a kiss, we finally made it to the car. I can see her trying to readjust to be more comfortable, moving her legs around every which way. 

I look over at her, letting out a small ‘hey’ before patting my leg. I reach over, carefully grabbing her ankles and pulling her legs out over my lap. We sit in the comfortable quiet for a bit, whatever song she’s chosen playing softly while she just looks through her phone. My hand hasn’t left her since I moved her legs. Rubbing little circles on her ankle or just sliding up the side of her foot. Anything to keep some sort of contact, and she doesn’t seem to mind. 

She reaches over, lightly running her fingertips over my cheek. It’s hard not to smile at it; she’s so fucking cute. 

“Your face is still so soft,” she giggles. 

“I wanted to look nice,” I admit. 

She rebuttals quickly, “You always look nice.” 

“Mmm,” I start. “But standing next to you all day, I wanted to make sure I at least looked half as good as you.”  ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

The drive home felt short in comparison, but the lack of anxiety I felt this time probably helped. We immediately head up to the apartment, surprisingly avoiding the bar.

“Sooo..” I start, keeping my voice low as I sneak up behind her, sliding my arms around her waist. “The bar doesn’t close for a couple more hours..” 

She twists around in my arms to face me, “Jacob, you’re not about to go to work right now.”

“That wasn’t my thought, but thank you for that,” I let out in the most monotone voice. 

“Oh! Are you turning a new leaf already? One day of me pestering you to stop working is all it took?” She teases me with a little smirk plastered on her face. 

“You really don’t have to make fun of me,” I say, letting my hands settle on her hips. “But, yes— maybe it helped.“

Her hands held the sides of my face, “It is nice to just enjoy you outside of the bar.” 

I mumble back, “Is that so?” 

“Mhm,” Her body leans into me. “I don’t have to share you with anyone else this way.” You’re not sharing me in there either, trust me. 

“Are you trying to say you want more attention?”  I question her. 

“From you? Absolutely,” her voice is so sexy; my body feels like it’s on fire. I want quite literally nothing more than to do that.

Pulling her into me, I whisper, “What kind of attention do you want, hun?” 

“Mmmm…” She hums, before her head tilts slightly and with a delicious little smile on her lips. And then she whispers, “You’re full of surprises today; why don’t you decide, babe?” 

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Nineteen

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[lvis44]

Sweet Escape Pt. 6 // LH 44

Lewis Hamilton x Y/N

Warnings: Swearing, 18+ (mentions of sexual activities), Anxiety, Jealousy, Angst, Mentions of Alcohol, Regret, Emotional Turmoil, Not Edited

Word Count: 4.3k

Summary: Paradise is supposed to be fun and relaxing... a Sweet Escape, but when unspoken feelings and jealousy rise to the surface, everything can be turned upside down in the blink of an eye.

Note: I felt bad leaving you all in pain, not that this will be much better but hey, we're getting there! This part is a tad shorter but I felt that this whole thing should be stand alone. The next part will be the final part of the story, but don't worry there will be an epilogue. I'm glad you have all been enjoying so far and I greatly appreciate everyone's support!

I am not a professional writer and all of this is a work of fiction and is strictly for fun. Enjoy! xxx

Previous Sections: Prologue - Part One - Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five

It was nearing three in the morning when you heard your door open. The second you had arrived home you had grabbed your stuff out of Charlotte's room and moved back into your old one. You weren’t particularly in the mood to face anyone. You had spent the last few hours quietly sobbing into your knees, balled up on the bed like a child. You had seemingly run out of tears but the sorrow didn’t change. You hadn’t even heard everyone come home, somehow beating them even on foot, you assumed it was because they had to go find everyone else.

“What?” You snapped at whomever had entered your room, not even looking toward the door.

“Hey, I just wanted to make sure you were okay.” You heard Miles’ voice from the doorway, his voice barely above a whisper.

“Do I seem fucking okay?” You snapped again, your filter long gone.

He let out a sigh, closing the door behind him softly as he dared to make his way over to your bed, sitting down beside you gently.

“I’m sorry Y/N, it wasn’t fair to you to cause a scene like that.” He says softly, glancing over at you to see you staring into space, your attention fixated on the blank wall to the side of the room.

You scoff, not trying to be rude but unable to control anything that comes out of you, “Well at least one of you knows how to fucking apologize. I’m still mad at you though.”

You hear him sigh again, moving closer to you so he can place a hand on your back, rubbing softly. You don’t even have the energy to flinch away from him, just letting him rest his hand there and enjoying the slightest bit of comfort.

“I know you’re pissed at Lewis, you have every right to be. Don’t kill her but Charlotte kind of filled me in when we got home. He massively fucked up.” His hand continues it’s light circling pattern, “And truth be told so did I. I don’t know why but I constantly feel like I need to protect you and hearing that asshole call you anything other than perfect made me want to kill him, he’s honestly lucky Lewis had half a brain to pull me away from him. I know you can take care of yourself but I’m always gonna look out for you, no matter what. Hence the reason I tried to deck my best friend earlier tonight.”

“I’m sorry, you what?” You whip your head towards him, that last bit of information really catching your interest.

“Yeah, when Charlotte filled me in I was still livid with the whole situation from the bar and finding out what sparked it really pissed me off. It only felt right he get at least a swift kick to the groin. Not to disappoint you but Char stopped me. I’m shocked you didn’t hear us.” He almost sounds like he wants to laugh as he tells you, like he can’t believe the whole situation himself.

“He needs a kick to the groin, taking that thing out of commission for a little while might do everyone some good.” You joke dryly, making Miles laugh next to you.

“If you need me to do it, I’m more than willing.” He offers, only kind of a joke, you feel like if you genuinely asked him to do it, he would, given the circumstances.

“I hate that I can hate him and love him all at the same time. I don’t want to lose him, but this can’t carry on this way.” You confess to Miles.

“I know Charlotte already said this to the both of you, but you guys really need to fucking talk.” He tells you seriously, before adding, “And sober.”

“I know, I know.” You groan, “I’m sorry we’ve managed to fuck up so much of vacation.”

“It’s been much more him than you sweetheart, he brought every ounce of drama himself. I could tell something was up with you over the last few days but I couldn’t really figure out what. I’m sorry it’s him.” Miles brings you in for a side hug, his arm wrapping protectively around you.

“I’m just so fucking sick of it all. I’m so tired.” You tell him, leaning against his shoulder.

“I know, understandably so.” Miles lets out a sigh, holding you in silence for a few moments. “You get some sleep and I’ll check on you in the morning, okay?” He says as he presses a kiss to your temple.

All you do is nod, knowing he’s right.

“I know you’re not all good or anything, but I’m glad you're still here. I was worried you were gonna be at the airport by the time we got home, we freaked for a second when we saw your stuff wasn’t in Charlottes anymore.” He tells you quietly, still not having let you go.

“I just didn’t want to have to face anyone, figured moving back to my old room would be the easiest way.” You just about whisper, feeling your exhaustion catch up to you.

“Well, I’m sorry to have intruded, but I needed to check on you,” Miles says, kissing your forehead one more time before easing you back toward your pillows, “get some sleep hun.”

. . .

You had no idea what time it was when you finally woke up and you have no idea how long you’ve been laying in your bed staring at the ceiling. It has to have been a good hour at this point. You can hear people moving around somewhere in the house, the last thing you want to do is go and interact. You were embarrassed, angry, hurt, and so much more you couldn’t even wrap your head around. You’ve had enough. As you’ve been laying there, more than once you’ve contemplated if you could manage to pack your stuff and sneak out of the house, fly back home without another word. You knew you couldn't and more than likely someone would come track you down the second they knew you were gone, well normally they would. You don’t know what your friends know of the situation. How much did everyone else see, how much had they been told? You knew you should get up and eat something but you had no appetite, anxiety and dread having taken over your body. You lay there going through your thoughts for more than an hour. You want to sit down and talk with Lewis, you need to, but the anxiety of the possible outcome is paralyzing you. What if he confirms your fears, admits that all he’s ever been trying to do is get it your pants? What if now that you’ve shut him down he doesn’t see a reason to keep you around anymore? The rational part of your brain knows that you're overthinking, that your friendship with Lewis still stands on semi solid ground. Maybe there will be some change to how he is around you or how often he’s with you but at the base of it all your still close friends. Lewis knows things about you that your own family doesn’t, he’s been able to read you better than you can read yourself on more than a few occasions, all of that can’t go up in smoke this quickly. Can it?

There’s a soft knock on your door, making you groan. You don’t respond hoping they’ll go away. They don’t, only knocking again and gently pushing the door open. You roll your head to the side, seeing Miles peeking his head into your room, a comforting smile on his face. True to his word, here he was to check on you.

“Good morning,” He says softly, making his way into your room once he sees you’re awake, “I brought you something to eat, you need to get something in you.”

You give him a small smile as he places a tray of fruit and a large glass of ice water on the table next to your bed.

“Thanks.” You croak out, your voice hoarse from crying all night.

“Everybodies in their rooms for the most part if you need to venture out of hiding at any point.” He tells you, knowing you’ve been avoiding everyone, but one person in particular.

You just nod, taking a small sip of the cold water. It feels amazing on your burning throat, as if it’s your first drink of water after a month in the desert.

“What time is it?” You ask, trying to get some bearing on where you are in your life, even if it's just the time of day.

He glances down at the watch on his wrist, “Just before noon.”

It’s still earlier than you thought it was at this point and it fills you with a small sense of dread, there’s so much more of the day to go about trying to avoid everyone.

“You know no ones mad at you, right?” Miles makes sure you know that there’s no hostility facing you in the house.

You just shrug, unsure of how true that actually is and also not quite wanting to admit that it’s more so that you’re embarrassed to even see your friends. There’s another soft knock on the door and you're praying it’s Charlotte, the only other person you could bare being around right now. Much to your dismay, a very tired looking Lewis pokes his head around the door that Miles had left ajar. Your breath hitches, anxiety filling your body.

“Oh, shit, sorry, I’ll um-” Lewis stutters, not wanting to interrupt your chat with Miles.

“All good man, I was just gonna head out anyway.” Miles says, standing from where he had sat on your bed.

You know Miles can sense your anxiety but he gives you a look that says “just get it over with” and heads towards the door. Before he exits he turns back toward you and says “Holler for me if you need anything, alright?”

He whispers something to Lewis as he walks out and you can see a pained expression on Lewis’ face at whatever he said. Once he’s gone, Lewis stands awkwardly in the doorway, not quite being able to look at you as he plays with his hands down in front of him.

“You can come in.” You squeak, not actually fully wanting to say it but knowing it needs to be done. 

He finally looks at you, putting his hand on the door as if to close it but you can see the question in his eyes. You nod, not wanting your whole conversation to be heard by everyone in the house. He very gently pushes the door closed, making his way further into your room. He looks around, evidently unsure of what to do with himself. He opts for perching on the edge of your dresser just across from where you sit on the bed, you’re facing each other and you can feel your stomach filling with butterflies, but not the good kind you usually get when you’re around him.

“I owe you an apology, well, multiple apologies.” He finally says, looking down at the ground, ashamed. His voice is hoarse as if he’s just woken up.

You don’t say anything, unsure of what you would even say.

“I’m sorry for the way that I’ve treated you. I’m sorry for not talking to you sooner. I’m sorry that my company embarrassed you in front of everyone. I’m sorry for my behavior last night, all of it. I’ve treated you in a way that if anyone else did the same to you, I would hate them.” He finally apologizes for the last few days, finally looking at you as he does so.

He looks exhausted, much older than usual with bags under his eyes and more scruff than you're used to him allowing.

“Thank you,” you whisper, “and I’m sorry I avoided talking to you too.”

He shakes his head, “It shouldn’t have been on you to fix, I’m the one that fucked up.”

You offer a small smile in his direction. All is not immediately forgiven and this conversation needs to continue, but hearing him acknowledge the reasons he needed to apologize in the first place does your heart some good at the very least.

“Why did you do it?” You ask quietly, your voice timid, not sure you truly want the answer.

He looks surprised by the question, also not quite sure how to respond. He lets out a sigh as he collects his thoughts.

“I know it doesn’t make it right,” He starts, pausing for a moment to make sure his words come across as clearly as possible, “but, it’s been on my mind for a long time. I’m well aware that I went about it all wrong, especially last night, I was incredibly out of line last night, but I’ve thought about it alot.” He cringes at his admission.

You furrow your brow, worried this is going exactly the direction you feared, hoping he will continue.

“I don’t mean for that to sound creepy, but I’ve been really attracted to you for quite a while. I should have made that clear in a much different way. I never want you to feel like I’m trying to take advantage of you in any way, it makes me sick to think that I have ever made you feel like that.” He says, a look of regret on his tired face.

“What I said last night was harsh, my drunk brain just felt like it was the best way to get my point across.” You admit to him.

“But it wasn’t really that harsh, despite it not being intentional, it’s kind of true. What I said on the other hand, that was harsh, I never should have called you a tease or said you indulged in it, it wasn’t fair.” His words are firm, for the first time he’s holding steady eye contact with you, demanding your attention so you feel the remorse in his words.

“I need to be honest, it really hurts that you’re able to treat me like all the other girls you fuck around with, I thought I was more important to you than them.” You quietly admit to him.

“Fuck, you are. So much more important to me.” He says, finally moving from where he’s been leaning on your dresser and cautiously making his way toward where you sit on your bed. He carefully sits next to you, leaving a good distance but making sure he’s near you.

“Then how can you be so okay with chatting up the bar tender, grinding on some random woman, and then still come over and try to fuck me, yet again. All because your ego couldn’t handle me dancing with someone else, when you were doing exactly the same.” You push, needing him to truly understand just how shitty his actions made you feel.

“You’re right, I was jealous. In my ideal world you would have been dancing with me all night, but I knew you wouldn’t have allowed that where we were in our relationship. And then you found that prick and the way you were with him, it just set something off in me. I wasn’t thinking. I know that sounds like a horrible excuse but there was part of me that was hoping I could make you just as jealous as I was, not that you would be when you’ve made it clear you’re not interested, and I should have respected that. Between the alcohol and my ego, I let myself treat you like shit and there’s no excuse for that, I would take it back in a heartbeat if I could.” His face is sincere, you can tell just how much he regrets last night but it doesn’t automatically let him off the hook. He continues “And as for the bartender, I wasn’t chatting her up, she’s an old friend. I’ve never slept with her and never will, she’s like family. I got distracted talking with her and by the time I found you again you had that Jason dude on your hip.”

You want to laugh, not only at him forgetting Jadens name, but also at him saying you’re not interested. He has every right to assume you’re not, you’ve done nothing but turn him down. You almost want to tell him just how wrong he is, how the only reason you said no is because you don’t want to lose him, but right now is not the time for that, you don’t want to open any windows and derail the conversation that so far is going shockingly well, even if it hurts.

“Is she the woman you went to after your fight with Talia?” You push him slightly, hoping to get more out of him while he’s being so honest with you.

His face screws up for a second, confused how you would know that. You see the questioning look on his face and rush to clarify, to confess.

“I know you lied to me that night, or at least I kind of hope you did. I overheard you and Charlotte talking the next morning, something about a woman named Marina.” You explain.

He lets out a deep sigh, “Yeah, I’m sorry I lied to you. I wasn’t particularly in the mood to explain the whole situation. But to answer your question, yes, that is the woman that I went and saw.” He doesn’t offer any further explanation, you want to push him but you allow him to leave it at that, at least for now.

You both sit in silence for a moment, trying to figure out where to go from here.

“Lewis,” You say quietly, getting his attention, “I don’t want to lose you.”

His face morphs into absolute sorrow and pain, for a moment you worry that he’s mourning your friendship, not knowing how to break the news to you.

“Y/N, you’ll never lose me. I would go crazy without you.” His voice is soft but sincere as he carefully scoots closer to you on the bed, testing the waters slightly. You let him get close enough that your knees are touching, his hand coming to rest over yours, squeezing tightly.

“How do you think I could ever let you go?” He asks with a deep frown.

“Because you seemed to be okay with ruining our friendship just to get me in your bed.” You accuse him, your voice wavering.

“Sweetheart, I was never trying to ruin our friendship, I-” He takes a long pause, gathering himself with a deep breath, “I don’t know how to explain it exactly, but truth be told, me trying to get you into bed was never just me trying to sleep with you. It’s been a long time since I felt for someone how I feel for you and I’m not good at making that clear. I don’t even truly understand everything that I feel for you but, I know it’s a whole lot more and a whole lot different than how I feel about all of my other friends. I guess somewhere in my head I felt like I could get that across physically, that maybe it would make everything make sense once I had you. I know it sounds ridiculous but I don’t know how to do this.”

His confession both shocks and confuses you, your mind flitting back to the night he disappeared after his fight with Talia. That night he had told you that he had feelings for her, now he was trying to convince you of his feelings for you.

“What about Talia?” You ask, voice still unsure.

“What about Talia?” He throws back at you, confused as to why she matters right now.

“The night that we talked, after your fight, you told me you were worried that you had messed everything up with someone that you cared about or liked a lot, I don’t remember exactly what you said but…” You trail off, a slow moment of realization coming over you.

He chuckles softly, shaking his head as he looks down at the ground before returning his eyes to yours, “Y/N, I was talking about you. In no universe was I ever even considering Talia.” His words confirm what you’ve just realized and you want to slap yourself, you feel like an idiot.

“I- oh my god.” You breathe out, shutting your eyes. His eye contact suddenly feeling like too much.

You stand from the bed, disconnecting your hand from his. He stays seated, looking up at you as you begin to pace, letting you process what he’s said.

“How long?” You ask suddenly, stopping and looking at him.

“In all honesty, I don’t really know. I only really realized it sometime last year. I was thinking it would go away, that it was just some silly crush, but it just kept getting worse.” He explains, shrugging his shoulders as if it’s totally normal.

“So all the time that you were sleeping with all these other women and still flirting with me was, what?” You feel yourself getting agitated, not quite sure how to feel about his actions.

“I kind of figured that if I kept sleeping around that I would be satisfied and I wouldn’t feel the same way, but I couldn't help but keep flirting with you, it’s just naturally how I am with you, it feels right.” Once again he shrugs as if it’s no big deal.

“Do you not want to feel this way about me?” You ask quietly, a slight sting of rejection settling over you.

“No, no, that’s not it at all.” He rushes out, standing to approach you, carefully he puts his hands on your arms, making you look at him, “It’s not at all that I don’t want to feel this way about you, I’m glad I do to be completely honest. It’s just that I’ve been single for a very long time and I truly do not want to fuck this up, I’m scared that I’m going to and I’m going to lose you. It felt like everything would be so much easier if I could just keep being your friend and keep you in my life. But that didn’t happen, I still managed to fuck it up.”

You can feel tears forming in your eyes, he notices them too, a look of regret on his face.

“So what do you want?” You ask him, needing more clarity.

“All in all, I want you, I want to do this with you and god I want to not fuck it up. I want you to be mine, all mine, all in.” He says confidently, much more sure of himself than you feel.

You stare at him as the tears start to roll down your cheeks, your emotions are at an all time high. Part of you is filled with pure ecstasy, the man that you have crushed on for years is standing here in front of you confessing his feelings, asking you to be his. The other part of you is filled with absolute fear, the thought of trying and failing with him, losing one of the most amazing men you have ever met, your best friend. You know that a life with Lewis could either end in the most beautiful love you have ever experienced or the worst, most gut wrenching heartache known to man.

“Can I hug you? You look like you could use it.” His voice is soft, his heart aching as he watches you cry.

All you can do is nod as you let yourself fall into his hard chest. He holds you against him tightly, rubbing soft circles on your back as he once again lets you cry into his chest. You’ve done this too many times in the last twenty four hours. He stays silent, just letting you work through your emotions. When you finally calm down you pull your head from his chest but he keeps you tight against him, one of his hands coming up to wipe some remaining tears from your cheek. You revel in the feeling of his touch, how comforting a simple action can be. As you stare into his eyes you can see how much emotion and affection is hidden behind them. A soft, sad smile across his lips.

“What’s going through that beautiful mind?” He asks, his voice just above a whisper.

“I don’t know.” You tell him honestly.

He just nods, understanding how overwhelmed you must be.

“I need time, I need to think.” You say, averting your eyes from his, knowing you’ll say yes if you look into them for a moment too long.

“Take all the time you need, I’ll always be right here if you decide you’ll have me.” He says softly, pressing a kiss to the top of your head as he gives you another proper hug.

He finally steps away from you, leaving you feeling displaced in your own room, before he turns to leave he grabs your hand, squeezing it tightly, “And Y/N, no matter what you decide, you will never lose me. I will always be right here.” With that he leaves the room, leaving you behind with a whirlwind of thoughts.

As much as every part of you wants to believe him in saying he’ll never leave you, you can’t help but wonder if it’s fully true. If you try this and all of it comes crashing down, you can’t imagine being able to be around him.

Is the possibility of loving and being loved by the most incredible human being worth the possibility of losing him entirely? 

[theitgirlnetwork]

Hi! I love your writing soo much! Especially your" Better" series. Do you think you could write something where Lip is a single, teen dad who has a daughter? I really want to see him as a girl dad!

Hii!!! Thank you so much! I'm glad you're enjoying! I appreciate this so much. He is very girl dad coded to me so I love this. I also think being a dad, particularly a teen one would bring out some complex feelings in Lip. Also there's a bonus at the end that people who don't like Charlotte (the OC from Better) should skip. It's short and sweet, but let me know if you guys want more from Phoebe Gallagher.

warning: strong language

“I’m fucked.”

That was the first thing Lip said to his little brother Ian, blowing smoke into the air of their shared bedroom when he got home from seeing his…girlfriend…bestfriend…? Babymama. 

When Karen had invited him over to her house earlier that day, he’d assumed he was gonna get to fuck. Or at least get some head. He’d had a long day in the two classes he’d attended, a blowie was exactly what he’d needed. And to her credit, that’s what he’d gotten. Except immediately after she spit into one of her mother’s doilies and got off of her knees she unenthusiastically announced to him, ‘I’m pregnant.’ And then she started flipping through a magazine. 

Lip sat on the edge of her bed for a solid twenty minutes just opening and closing his mouth. Finally swallowing down the lump that immediately formed in his throat and fixed his wide blue eyes on her.  “You…gonna keep it?”

It’s fair. That Karen kicked him out. He understood. 

But shit. He was just a kid. He wasn’t ready to be a fucking dad, he’d been carrying around the same $30 for the past week in an attempt to replenish he and Ian’s weed supply. Fiona was gonna fucking kill him. He was gonna fucking kill himself.

Lip dragged himself home from Karen’s, ran upstairs, ignoring the calls from Debbie to help her with her homework and slammed the door. Ian had made his way in a lit a blunt for them to share, pushing open their rickety window, sitting with him in silence until the dam finally burst and Lip started confessing. 

“Yeah, you are.” Ian blows a cloud of smoke from his nostrils, snorting as Lip kicks his leg with his own. “I don’t know why you’re so worried man, there’s no way Karen’ll keep it. Even if she does, any person with a dick within a 40 mile radius could be the dad.” 

“Fuck you.”

“You’re gonna have to clean up that language when the baby gets here.” 

After Lip climbed over the bed and kicked Ian’s ass, he rolled back into his, gritting his teeth to himself. He was at an impasse. He couldn’t believe he’d fucked up like this. Sure he’d hit raw a couple of times, but he’d thought they were good. He mostly pulls out. And Isn’t Karen supposed to handle that? And he’s not a fucking idiot. He knows Karen is a hoe. But the intimacy he’d had with her, he can’t believe she shares with everyone else. They’re best friends, and they love each other. There’s no way she’d let him believe the baby was his if it wasn’t.

So he’s having a baby. So what? Lip is living in a modern era. There are…options. Before the baby is born and after. If Karen keeps it, they can put it up for adoption. They could give it to a family who really wants it, who will take care of it. They could give it a good home, away from it’s shitty parents. It wouldn’t get stuck being a Gallagher with an addict and bum for a father. His baby…the baby…it could be loved and cared for. And Lip could go about his business. He could live up to his potential, without any baggage holding him back. 

He’d really believed that to be true, too. He thought he’d be able to see that baby one good time, and pass them off without any regret, content to know that any responsibility he had for it had dissipated. 

But then he saw her. 

Lip was standing there, in oversized scrubs, and clutching Karen’s hand when he first heard her take her first breath. She’d let out a wail so loud and Lip felt his heart ache at the sound. He hadn’t even noticed that he’d let go of Karen’s hand. His feet moved without his permission, guiding him over to the sinks where the nurses were washing her off. He trailed after her to get a good glimpse, and when he did, the world changed. 

Large blue eyes. Little wisps of hair. Her cries slow to small hiccups. 

Lip was in love. 

The older nurse rocks the newly swaddled baby slowly, smiling brightly as she makes her way back to where Karen lies in the bed. “Well, Mom, your beautiful baby girl has arrived. Let me let you hold her-”

“No.” Karen cut in sharply, her tone startles Lip and all off the nurses. The teen girl grips the railing of the bed, grunting as she scoots up, looking at everyone but the little angel squirming in the nurse’s arms. “I…don’t wanna hold her. I don’t want to see her. Give her to the agency lady.” 

“But-” the nurse stammers, looking between her and Lip.

“Honey,” the doctor lowers her mask, bending to make herself level with Karen. “You can change your mind. You can still decide that you’d like to keep your baby.”

“She’s not my baby.” Karen breathes, screwing her face up in determination. 

Lip doesn’t understand. He can’t understand. How could she be here, in the room, with that baby…hell, carry her for 9 months, and choose not to even look at her. Even hold her. He could respect not wanting to be a mom yet, not being ready. But right now, the way Karen was acting, she’s never reminded him of his own parents more. 

That little girl deserves better. She deserves love. She deserves someone who would love her more than anything.

“Um, excuse me,” He hears himself say. His hands extend toward the nurse as everything else in the room becomes blurry except the new little human that was half of him but just that fast, all his. “I’d…um…I’d like to hold her.”

“Phoebe, baby, it’s good. Watch, Daddy likes it.” 

Lip brings the pink rubber spoon to his mouth, spooning a small scoop of his daughter’s turkey puree baby food into his mouth. As soon as the taste hits his tongue he gags, dropping the spoon to the table and shooting up. “Motherfucker!”

Phoebe squeals, giggling as her father darts over to the sink, sticking his head under the faucet and attempts to flush out the foul taste. 

“That shit is fucking nasty, Daddy’s sorry he tried to give you that.” He coughs, lifting the girl out of her highchair and into his arms. The blond buries his face into his daughter’s chubby cheeks, nosing her golden curls out of the way before kissing her cheek repeatedly. 

“Are you still here?” Fiona asks, tilting her head and crossing her arms in disapproval as she watches their display. She’d been surprised when her brother had stopped his ex-girlfriend from putting their baby up for adoption last year. He’d been determined, filling out the necessary paperwork for full custody before completely ex-communicating Karen. He'd not asked Fiona about moving the newborn into their home when he asserted he’d be raising her himself. He was undeterred by her declaration that he’d be on his own, and the baby would not at all be her responsibility. He’d simply adjusted the baby carrier on his hip, flipping her off before carrying the little girl up to his room. 

His academic excellence was the only thing that encouraged teachers to be understanding about his almost constant absences. “I, uh, I gotta skip today, Phoebe has a doctor’s appointment.” He says, smoothing a hand over his daughter’s cherub cheeks, brushing away remains of the baby cheese puffs he gave her while he’d gotten her food out. 

“This is the third time this week.” Fiona sighs, crossing her arms. “Lip-”

“It’s fine, fuck it, it doesn’t matter.”

“It’s your senior year. There’s limits on how many days you can miss before they stop you from graduating.” Fiona nods to herself, mumbling an ‘okay’ under her breath. “I can watch her today. I don’t work until tonight, alright, I’ll take the baby, you go to school, we’ll figure out a schedule later.”

Lip wants to accept. He does. He’s done a year of being a father without accepting any help, mainly because no one was fuckin’ offering, but also because no one would take care of his baby quite like he would. He stops by the school and picks up his work. Hell, some days, he brings her with him, the ghetto ass district he lives in isn’t exactly strict, how could they tell their most promising student he couldn’t bring his very well behaved baby with him.  He glances down at the baby girl in his arms and feels his heart grow with the innocent little smile he receives back. 

And the thought of leaving her feels unappealing as ever. 

“Nah, I got it, thanks though.”

Something about Lip being a dad shocked the whole neighborhood. No one was surprised that he’d knocked someone up, it was only a matter of time the way he was going. And only a few had raised a brow at the fact that he’d promptly told Karen to fuck off and kept the baby to raise himself. With how he grew up, anyone could guess he’d have a thing about abandonment. No, what shocked them was the way that suddenly, Lip Gallagher was some kind of family man. 

No parties. No weed. No dealing. 

No hookups.

Lip got hit on way more than he did back before Phoebe took over his life. When he was at the store or in the park, his baby cooed broken words as he carried her on his shoulders, pointing at small trinkets that she whined for. Easily pocketable things that occasionally magically appeared in his pocket to give her when they got home. Girls would come up to them, fingers in their hair, chests as pushed forward as they squawk about how adorable Phoebe is, how sweet it is that Lip is actually taking the time to raise his own daughter, and how they’d like to help him in any way they can. 

Usually, he would just leave it at no thank you before turning away. The more persistent ones would get a curl of the lip and head shake before adjusting his baby and pushing past. 

See, Lip was fucking strict as a dad. He didn’t give a fuck what other people thought about him and the life he lived before, everything changed when Phoebe showed up. 

“Hey, I uh, really don’t give a fuck what you do, but keep that hoe shit to a minimum when you’re over here, okay? My fuckin’ daughter can see you.” 

More than a few neighborhood girls had stormed their way out of the Gallagher house with hot, fat tears of embarrassment streaming down their face as they declared they’d never talk to Debbie again. Because…you know… her brother’s an asshole.

By the time Lip is 17 and Phoebe is 2 it’s a well known fact that the Gallagher Princess is spoiled rotten. She’s clingy, and whiny, traits that the blond teen had never been known to tolerate but suddenly had all of the patience in the world for. She barely could stand to be held by anyone else, constantly in her father’s arms or wrapped around one of his legs, holding on as he walks for them both.  The only people he really let's watch Phoebe are Ian and Mickey. For some reason, Mickey seemed to have a soft spot for Phoebe. Maybe it was because they understood each other. They're both cute, and bratty, and bite. It was ironic considering who Mickey is, and his distain for Lip but when the blond teen had been overwhelmed one day and passed out on the couch with his books after school, his brother's boyfriend had been the one who stepped up. He'd been in the Gallagher home in search of some cheap weed Ian had promised him, but he saw the little girl whining and after a failed attempt wake Lip, made her a bottle his damn self. When Lip had woken, he found Mickey rocking the squirming little girl in his arms, trying to pretend he wasn't enamored with her. After that day, Mickey proclaimed himself the girl's favorite uncle, and got damn near violent if anyone even tried to so much as give her a tap on the wrist. Lip appreciated it considering he felt the same.

Other parents fucking dread when they see the father-daughter duo making their way to the park because it immediately means that play was over for all of the other kids.

Timmy Keeves had learned the hard way. The little boy was all but 5 when he first encountered the terror that was Phoebe Gallagher. She was a 3 year old terror and loud and bossy as ever. Her blonde curls and bright blue eyes gave her the appearance of an angel, so Timmy hadn’t been alarmed when she’d walked slowly, but confidently over to the swing, his swing at the little run down park a couple streets over from his house. She was holding hands with a little black boy who looked a little older than her, but not by much.

Timmy had waited his turn, really. The other kid before him had swung five whole minutes before he had climbed on with great effort. “Hi!” He’d chirped down at the kids in front of him. 

“Hi.” the little boy said back.

Not the little girl. No, she pointed at the swing with her free hand, mouth spreading into a wide smile, revealing one missing tooth.”My turn!”

Timmy’s eyes had grown wide and he gripped the chains a little tighter. “No! I just got on it!”

It happened fast.

In a matter of seconds. Timmy hadn’t meant to nudge her out of the way with his foot. Really. He’d already been swinging and she’d moved in his way. But before he knew it Phoebe Gallagher had plopped onto the rocks and clay in front of him, and suddenly he felt his back hitting the ground.

“Hey!” Timmy wails as his own father storms his way over and some young blond guy comes running up. “Gallagher, your fuckin’ kid just pushed mine off the swing!”

The blond man flicks his cigarette on the ground and shrugs. “I didn’t see it. You push him Liam?”

“He pushed Phoebe first!” 

“It was an accident!” Timmy hollers.

“Sounds like the little fucker deserved it. Don’t push girls, kid. Or next time I’ll knock you on your ass.”

“Are you threatening my kid?”

“What’re you, gonna hit me?” Lip snorts, picking his daughter up and brushing off her skirt. “I’m a minor.”

“You need to get those hoodrat kids of yours in order!” 

“What you need to do is stop whining like a little bitch, it’s rubbin’ off on your kid.” The teen adjusts the girl on his hip, grabbing his little brother’s hand on the other side and guiding them away. 

So, Lip wasn’t a great disciplinarian. As far he was concerned, his daughter was still a good kid. She’s fuckin’ smart like him. And sweet, like Debbie and Ian. Funny like Carl. Determined like Fiona. She makes him want to be better. He finished high school so she could see how important learning is. He put off college a little bit, just because he’d rather use that time to make money to take care of her. Besides, when it came to Phoebe, there was nothing more important. He didn’t want to miss a thing.

“Daddy?” Phoebe whispered from her spot between his legs. She was watching Little Bear on the tv as Lip rested the book he was reading atop of her head, sloppy pigtails that he’d forced into her blond mop that morning. “How come there’s three?”

“Three what, angel?” he asks without looking up from the pages, snorting to himself at the philosophy of Thoreau in Walden. 

“Three bears.” Little fingers push at his face, trying to force him to look at the screen. “Look.”

“Okay, shit, okay. What?” He asks, leaning forward to rest his head on top of hers and dropping the book to the couch. 

“Th-there’s a daddy bear, a baby bear, and a mommy bear. We only have two. Daddy,” she places her hand on his stomach, turning in his grasp, “and I’m the baby. Except I’m a big girl.” 

Lip’s heart squeezes at where he knows this conversation is going. His baby is smart. She’s always been smart. He should’ve seen this coming. But for some reason he hadn’t prepared yet for this question. “We uh, we have more than two. We’re Gallagher’s, there’s too many of us. Like, Fiona, Ian, Debbie, Carl and Liam. There’s a lot of us.”

“But no mommy, right?” Phoebe’s little brows furrow as she runs through the list in her head. 

All Lip could do was open and close his mouth as he searched for words. He was only 18 when this conversation came. Still a kid himself, he’d just stopped giving a fuck that the closest thing he’d had to a mom was his own older sister. Sometimes he still felt bitter. Unwanted. Cheated. That was the last thing that he wanted his baby to feel. He’d spent the first two years of her life trying to ensure she wouldn’t notice. To do everything he could. Fill every space. She didn’t need anyone but him, because he was so fucking here. Every girly dance, every beauty salon, every tea party, he took the time to do. Because he didn’t want her to feel the sting of having a parent that didn’t give a fuck about you. He didn’t want the look in her eyes that he saw in his siblings, the one he refused to acknowledge reflecting back at him in the mirror. Going above and beyond what an adult man could do as a child himself. All for her.

Yet here she was. Wondering where mommy was.  

Lip could fucking kill Karen. If she wasn’t the one who gave him Phoebe.

He must’ve not hidden his face well. Because as advanced as his daughter was, the face that slipped onto her own was nothing but that of a child. Her eyes widened as she observed him and little hands squeezed his forearms. “It’s okay, Daddy. I like just two. It’s okay.”

Lip could kill Karen. But for now, he was going to focus on his daughter.

Bonus: Lip: 20yrs Phoebe: 5yrs

“And if someone fucks with you?”

“My dad will kick your ass.” Phoebe smiles, swinging Lip’s hand as she holds it in her own. “But no one is gonna be mean to me, Daddy. I’m a pretty girl.”

“Yeah, well I’ll kick their ass if they’re too nice too. Hold on, angel lemme get the keys from Kev.” 

“Kay!”

It was Phoebe’s first day of school and to say they were both nervous and excited was an understatement. Lip had saved up for three months for new clothes for Phoebe to wear to school. They’d used the flashcards at the library for the past year to give her a head start. Lip was finally starting college too. He’d do two years at community college to save up more money until he could transfer his credits and get a place for him and Phoebe closer to the university. But all of that was the future. Right now, he just had to survive dropping his baby off to school. He’d always been stingy with Phoebe. She was something that was his alone. Yes, they had family but he kept her far away from Frank and left the house altogether whenever Monica tumbled into town. He never offered for Karen to see her, even when she came back, only accepting the occasional child support check from Sheila and spending it solely on Phoebe. Now he’d have to share her with the world and ask (demand) for it to be kind to her.

“I wanna ring it!” Phoebe hollers, lifting her arms for Lip to hoist her up to ring Kev and V’s doorbell. He grunts dramatically as he lifts her, cherishing her giggles as she presses the bell over and over again.

Lip’s brows furrow when he hears a sweet voice calling from inside of the house, ‘I’m coming, I-jeez I’m coming!” 

Phoebe’s gasp echoes Lip’s inner thoughts as the door swings open, revealing a young woman who is definitely fucking not Kev or V. The girl smiles brightly, keys to Kev’s truck dangling around her dainty, manicured finger. Long lashes flutter around pretty brown eyes that glance at him politely before focusing on his daughter.

“Daddy! A princess!” Phoebe grins, tugging at the collar of his shirt.

The girl just smiles wider, brow lifting as she places her hands on her hips. “Well I was just about to say the same thing. Pleasure to meet you, your highness.” she dips into a brief curtsy, causing his daughter to squeal and kick her little legs. Those same pretty brown eyes lift to meet Lip’s again and he realizes he’d just been staring at the exchange, mouth agape, like a fucking idiot. “I’m Charlotte.”

Lip knows scientifically he doesn't have ovaries, but if they did, the way his daughter was looking at this girl would’ve made his burst. 

“Lip.”

[beccaann22]

you look like you love me - riley green

pairing: riley green x fem!reader

summary: reader sees riley walk into the bar and knows just what she wants.

warnings: drinking, flirting, suggestive contents, love

i was all but 22

i think at the time

i'd been out on the road

lonely at night

and it had been awhile

so it was on my mind

y/n has been out at the bar all night so far with her friends. they're traveling following the rodeo as it makes it rounds through the southern and midwestern states. y/n is a barrel racer, while her friends range from tricker riders to bull riders. they had just wrapped up a long day of sweating in the hot sun of oklahoma while doing what they do best. putting on a show for the rodeo fans. and they loved it, they really did. y/n loved feeling the adrenaline right before she set off for that first barrel with her most precious belonging. cooper. her beautiful chestnut quarter horse. he's been with her since she was a teenager and has followed her on this journey with the rodeo. but y/n has been missing something for a while now and she can't seem to figure out what it is.

y/n and her friends where exushted though, they had been working since 7 this morning practicing and then the actual events themselves. needless to say they all needed a break. its currently eight o'clock at night and they'd been here since six in the evening. sure they had dinner here first before they started drinking but as soon as the last plate left, and round of tequila shots appeared at the table. currently y/n is currently nursing a strawberry daiquiri.

she was on a mission tonight. to get laid. its been far to long for her liking and it doesn't help that she's quit picky with her men. and she has a rule that she doesn't sleep with men she's working with. so that means all these rodeo boys she traveling with are off limits by her own rules. and she's fine with that, none of them quite do it for her anyways. too cocky in there own ways and don't quite look the part. she knows her type when she see's it though.

well, i saw him walk in

with his cowboy hat

and i thought to myself

i could use some of that

his boots like glass on a saw dust floor

had moves like nothing i had ever seen before

taking another sip of her drink, her eyes are drawn to the door when a rowdy group enters the bar. it's a group of men- cowboys- if you will and they were having the time of their lives tonight. they claim a booth not to far from y/n's booth with her friends. y/n nudges her friend, charlotte, in the side. nodding her head at the group of men next to them, y/n grins at charlotte. charlotte throws her head back laughing at y/n's antics and wiggles her eye brows back at y/n.

y/n jumps off the booth and lands her two feet on the floor, "hey y'all i'm gonna go get us another round real quick." her words quickly meet the ears of all her friends and they erupt in cheers. she giggles at them as she works her way up to the the bar. the bars not overly busy as it was a thursday night. but a majority of the rodeo crew was there, and there's quite a bit of them and the rest of the people who wanted to enjoy a night out with friends. she gets to the bar and leans against the counter waiting to get the bartenders attention. when she catches his eye and orders another round of beers this time she feels a presence next to her. from the corner of her eye she can see the side view of probably the most handsome man she's ever seen. he's wearing wrangler jeans that fit him just right in all the right places, a black carhartt shirt that hugs his biecps showing all his muscles, brown cowboy boots and black baseball hat for what she assumes is a football team. more then likely college. she turns her eyes back to the counter waiting for the beers.

the handsome man, riley, comes to be aware of his surroundings and notices the most beautiful girl next to him. his breath hitches completely caught off guard by her beauty. she was absolutely stunning to him. the most prettiest sight to see he was sure of it, and way out of his league. she was wearing these bootcut jeans that hugged her curves just right, brown cowboy boots and the prettiest lil shirt on her body hugging her chest and flaring out at the bottom. she had her hair curled and it was slightly messy from the days activities.

y/n could sense his eyes on her, so she thinks to herself, "screw it, what's the worst that could happen?" and she turns her head towards him and says, "well hi there cowboy," and gives him a cute little grin as she looks him up and down. this absolutely stuns riley, him not expecting her to acknowledge him, but boy is he glad she did.

putting on his big boy boots riley smiles down at the girl, he's 6'4' so naturally a lot of girls are shorter then him, and y/n's no exception. he swallows his nerves and breaths out a, "hello ma'am."

ma'am. he called he ma'am. y/n immediately melted. for some reason hearing him call her ma'am absolutely did it for her. she pulls herself together and rests her elbow on the counter and her chin on her hand, "you find something interesting that you're looking at," she asks him teasing him.

"yes ma'am, i found something quite pretty to look at while i wait for my drinks.. i'm riley by the way," he leans closer to her, so close that she can smell his cologne. boy oh boy does he smell good. there's no other way to describe it other then the scent of a hardworking man but comforting at the same time. husky and maybe a little sandal wood? leather perhaps. she has no idea what is it, all she knows is that it's her new favorite scent.

before she could reply, the bartender bring her the round of coors light and his round of what seems to be miller light. y/n and riley can hear their individual groups hollering for them, they look over and see that their groups have some how merged together and they're all mingling together. charlotte catches y/n's eye and winks at her. "oh thank you my sweet charlotte," y/n thinks to herself.

riley laughs, "well i guess are groups are together now then." y/n smiles at him and grabs her tray of beer, "looks that way." and she walks away from him and towards their groups handing out the beers to her friends. riley watches her walk away, her swaying hips absolutely doing him in for un-pure thoughts. he shakes his head trying to make them go away before following after her, handing the beer out as well.

charlotte leans into y/n's ear and whispers, "that man is eyeing you down so bad right now. if you don't make a move soon you'd be a fool." that gives y/n the confidence she needed. so she grabs an unopened beer from the table and walks right up to riley lightly guiding him away from the prying ears, and hands him a beer. she steps a little closer to him, leaving little space in between their chests. she looks up at him and says, "baby, i think your gonna wanna hear this."

he looks down at her, the small amount of space between them sending tingles all over his body, "what am i gonna wanna hear sweet thing?" he asks her raising his hand to her face, brushing hair out of her eyes lightly touching her cheek.

she reaches her hand up to her neck and stands on her tippy toes to whisper in his ear, "you look like you love me." she moves her lips to his other ear, "you look like you want me to want you to come on home."

he looks down at her, "oh, do i know darlin'?" he asks her with a grin on his face. he likes where this is going.

"oh baby i don't blame you for looking at me across this, but i'm drunk and i'm ready to leave. and you look like you love me," she whispers to him as she wraps her hands around his hips.

excuse me

you look like you love me

you look like you want me

to want you to come on home

and baby, i don't blame you

for lookin' me up and down across this room

im drunk and im ready to leave

and you look like you love me

riley looks over at his friends making sure they aren't being nosy sons of bitches and then looks back down at this girl who's making moves he never thought she would. he had no idea the night would lead to this. he just came to the local beer joint with the guys when this bold country girl was the only one in the room he could see. she was a dream come true. everyone else was invisible. and now here she is telling him everything he wants to hear.

well, i was down at the local beer joint with a few of the guys

when this cute little country girl caught my eye

and boy, let me tell you she was the prettiest thing i'd ever seen in a pair of boots

well, she walked right up to me and handed me a beer, gave me a look like, lets get out of here

and that's when i realized that she was every cowboy's dream come true

she told me this right here.

"come on riley, lets get out of here. your giving me this look like you want me to want you to come on home and you're looking me up and down from across the room. now baby i'm drunk and i wanna go home with you," y/n tells him. she knows what she's doing, she may be buzzed but she's not so drunk that she's not aware of her actions. she wants this. she wants him.

excuse me

you look like you love me

you look like you want me

to want you to come on home

and baby, i don't blame you

for lookin' me up and down across this room

im drunk and im ready to leave

and you look like you love me

she knew as soon as she saw him in his cowboy hat that this is the man she wanted. right now and possibly forever. she didn't wanna waste anymore time when she could be with him.

so if you ever see a man in a cowboy hat

and you think to yourself

"i could use some of that"

don't waste your time

just give 'em this here line

goes a little like this

"alright baby, you don't gotta convince me," riley tells y/n. he grabs her hand and leads her to the door of the bar and out to his truck. his hand on her thigh the entire drive back to his place. if he was gonna spend the night with a girl a special as y/n it wasn't gonna be some lame night in a truck or hotel room. he was gonna give her a real bed. his bed.

he pulls up to his home, parks and basically jumps out of the truck to run to the other side and open the truck door for y/n. she deserves chivalry. and he was gonna give that and more to her. he leads her inside and upstairs, to his bed. he lays her down gently. and from then on he treats like a lady. fulfilling every wish and command she had.

y/n was hooked. she needed riley for the rest of her life. this was the piece she was missing all along. riley was her void. she was complete now. don't be a fool though. just because she found riley doesn't mean her life stopped. no- she kept her life the same. she still barrel raced with cooper. she just didn't go state to state anymore. she doesn't go farther then a state away from oklahoma now. she found her riley and she doesn't plan on losing him. and neither does he. man he got so lucky, he tells himself that constantly. to find a girl as special as y/n was once in a life time, and he stuck gold. he wasn't planning on doing anything to risk that. they found each other when they least expected it. and now that they have each other they're complete. they're riley and y/n.

excuse me

you look like you love me

you look like you want me

to want you to come on home

and baby, i don't blame you

for lookin' me up and down across this room

im drunk and im ready to leave

and you look like you love me

[lyssala]

I was trying to figure out They are stuck in my mind at all times and when I was thinking, I realized oh OH they're the same picture. So really I apparently just have a trope hierarchy to which if you resemble Roy/Riza in anyway you skyrocket to the top of my list.

Some ramblings about Clorinde/Wriothesley under the cut because I have no where else to do it. I'm sorry to all the people who've been my followers for years and I literally just come here once a year to drop a ship fixation LOL Here's my big dose of copium I guess 🤣

(For the record, I have nothing against the popular pairings for either of them; I multiship just fine. There isn't an ounce of ship bashing in this because 1. that's rude lol 2. discrediting canonical relationships because they threaten the chances of my pair being on top defeats the purpose of analyzing characters)

(Updated: 8/25 just to acknowledge a few other various things before the end of the Fontaine era)

Roy & Wriothesley: fight using their hands (in different ways but still; fire and ice though); masks their true goals behind a facade (whether staged like Roy or Wriothesley just letting people believe what they want about him); most people don't know their true personality/history; hold a position of power in what most people assume is ambition but really they just want to do good to those who need it.

Riza & Clorinde: observant/quiet personality; the world's best shot; the best poker face; straight faced humor; tough as nails; sass and teasing is a love language; recognized as the top of their respective fields and respected by many.

It's uncanny right??

1. Familiar With One Another

It's so clear they have history together. This is not their first mission, first interaction. They can read the lines between what is being said to understand something more, that is the definition of knowing and understanding how someone operates. It means some kind of history.

Between her greeting upon walking in the room (Clorinde: What's that look on your face? I thought I made good time on the way back.) and her knowing how he is about tea (Wriothesley: Want some tea? Clorinde: Not particularly. If you want to drink some that badly, just say so.) Those are not things you would know/say if you don't know a person. She knows he's giving her a weird look, or a look she wasn't expecting. He offers tea, and instead of saying no thank you, she's just no, but I know you do and you don't need me as an excuse 🤣

Even when he clarifies for her that he does want tea, he asks her again, maybe knowing she does actually like it but only if he's already making it - which I do all the time to Ren LOL (Wriothesley: Fine, I'd like to get some tea. Want me to get you a cup too, since I've already made it?) and that time she agrees (Clorinde: Eh, might as well then, I suppose.)

Idk like these are people who know each other. They know their quirks and their mannerisms. They talk to each other as equals (he doesn't question when she's telling the Duke wtf are you looking at me like that I'm right on time, and he's just like I know you're right on time you always are) I just think that's a big deal??

During the wrap-up of the main story quest, when talking to Charlotte when Clorinde is dodging interview attempts and Charlotte guesses how Clorinde knew Charlotte had an interview at Meropide (Clorinde: In truth, all Monsieur Neuvillette asked me was "When did the Fortress become so friendly towards the media?" I told him that it was best not to speak too soon — there's no guarantee that Wriothesley will make a personal appearance). It's likely that Clorinde was in the room when Neuvillette spoke the question aloud, but I also like him going up to her just to ask her like she'd know the answer to what Wriothesley was doing. I mean, she did still know the answer: that just because Charlotte had an interview, Wriothesley probably wouldn't show up. She knows he hates publicity as much as Clorinde does - I do have to imagine its because they've talked about it, they're friends.

In that same scene, Clorinde says to Navia that she seems interested in the Fortress, and Navia says duh, but that man gave me a headache (Navia: Of course! Ugh, that Wriothesley... I still remember going down to the Fortress to grill him for information on my father's case. Boy, did he take me for a ride... without telling me anything, of course). Clorinde then is like, yeah, but he invited you to tea, and it was good, right? (Clorinde: But he did invite you to tea, didn't he? Navia: Two large pots of it, in fact — it was good tea, though. Clorinde: I have to agree. The tea there is very good). My girl, how much time do you spend down there to know he'll habitually ask and that it's always good. Also, lol, the fact that she gave him such a hard time saying no, I don't want any tea, but if you want it, I'll have it, but then to Navia, Clorinde is much more straightforward about how good his tea is because she isn't teasing Navia.

Then of course their bets. (Wriothesley: I win this bet. You owe me a present. Clorinde: Very well, it was indeed just as you said.) This is a thing they do and apparently have done before. She literally talks about how much he gets into it, implying she's learned to go along with it because she knows he enjoys it.

My girl MY GIRL how do you know what kind of gifts he likes, or that he enjoys it all if you haven't done this a million times (Clorinde: Wriothesley gets really invested in that sort of thing. But he couldn't care less about what he wins in the end. Clorinde: You could give him mint plants that you plucked from the side of the road, and he wouldn't even mind). I also have to wonder if the reason he doesn't set a stipulation on what he wants, is because he likes to see what she comes up with, what reminds her of him and that's why he's so happy with anything - that's a little too me with the ship colored glasses on but still (the only other time we see him given a gift he's appreciative, but poor sweet Neuvillette has to explain it first so I can't judge Wriothesley's reaction in comparison).

A smaller thing is Navia always complaining about how hard it is to talk to Wriothesley while Clorinde just bubbles about calling the Duke by his first name and how he likes making bet and loves gifts 🤣 (Navia: If only he was that easygoing when it came to talking business...) I know it's because Wriothesley intentionally avoids Navia due to whatever promise he made with her father. Still, the image of Navia's best friend being super chill with the Duke of Meropide while Navia is exhausted by the thought of talking to him is so superb. Chefs kiss on that dynamic, Hoyo (also can we talk about how the trio of Wrio, Clorinde, and Navia doesn't get nearly enough love and I'm genuinely saddened over that).

I guess one last thing for this section because I don't know where else to fit it, with Wriothesley, to everyone else Clorinde is Miss Clorinde, including to her when they're in public but when Wriothesley is talking to Neuvillette when he's delivering all the gifts, she's just Clorinde (Wriothesley: I have to hand it to Clorinde. Just a simple gift delivery, and she has the great and mighty Iudex at her beck and call.) possibly because Neuvillette would be one of the few people to know they have a relationship outside of work? Though Clorinde is just like oh yeah Wriothesley is just like that in front of a whole slew of people LOL so maybe it's an on work time/off work time thing 🤣 I don't necessarily have a clear analysis but I 💯 noticed it still.

2. Familiar With The Fortress

Moreso for Clorinde since obviously Wriothesley is familiar with it. I think the most clear indication there is for Clorinde spending time down there is through Sigewinne. The official livestream announcement image being a lovely example.

Okay, I know it's because her and Sigewinne were the two new characters and like I said Sigewinne doesn't leave Meropide all too often. Still there were plenty ways to promote them: in the infirmary, in Neuvillette's office (like they did later for her demo/trailer), at the dining hall in Meropide, streets of Fontaine, even no place at all. A choice was made to have them sitting in Wriothesley's office.

I mean Clorinde has to spend a decent amount of time down there??Sigewinne has her drink meaning either Clorinde was comfortable enough to brew Wriothesley's tea or he brewed it for her/them. It's his teas set that sits in his office in game. Again these were choices that were made LOL Clorinde is reading so she's clearly not there for business, just hanging out in his office with Sigewinne.

Also, Clorinde's little smile 🥹 Another is the dolphin (whale? looks dolphin to me) sticker on her book, meaning that Sigewinne made a sticker of Clorinde (like she did with Wriothesley and Neuvillette). Most of all implying that Clorinde is close enough to Sigewinne to get that honor and the fact it's on Clorinde's book, that she spends enough time in Meropide that Sigewinne also likes to stick stickers on Clorinde's things like Sigewinne does to Wriothesley.

Another small thing, was Clorinde in Sigewinne's character trailer. Navia was about to guzzle that tea when Clorinde stopped her like, no, girl, wait. She's 100% had Sigewinne's drink creations before there would be no reason for Clorinde to otherwise stop Navia. And even Clorinde's little cough compare to Navia's big wide eyes of shock lol Clorinde has been through it.

One last thing with Sigewinne is her voiceline about Clorinde and that she's been around Clorinde enough to try to learn how to read her (Sigewinne: Miss Clorinde doesn't make a lot of facial expressions when she talks. It's pretty difficult to tell what mood she's in from what her face is doing...She used the lipstick I gave her? Really? Hee-hee, I'm so glad she likes it! I knew that color would go great on her!). But, Sigewinne also knows her enough to give her gifts - and vice versa (Clorinde: And some tea-flavored hard candies. They're for Sigewinne) - because they're also friends. That can literally only happen if Clorinde has spent time there longer than what we've seen/were told.

Another thing I found so cute about Clorinde's connection to Meropide, was in Clorinde's story quest, when they went to the Meropide set (Clorinde: I admire the work put into the set. Still, it's obvious the script writer has never paid a visit to the Fortress of Meropide). Yes, yes, we know, you're apparently so familiar with it you can tell when details are missing, okay, girl.

A little more of a stretch with some ship goggles on but I can't help but laugh at the image of Clorinde smiling at the prospect of getting to throw her players in Meropide and as GM getting to play Wriothesley's job (Furina: So this set... is going to be a part of the script? Clorinde: Unfortunately, that is something I can neither confirm nor deny. Paimon: Um, anyone think Clorinde's smile is starting to look kinda scary...?). Still sort of unrelated but also Paimon's line in that scene was adorable too - if only there were snacks in prison...oh, there are if the Duke likes you LOL (Paimon: If only there were desserts and tea in real prison... Oh, wait, guess that's kind of how the Fortress of Meropide works if you're lucky.)

3. Same Sense of Humor

Their humor too omg they have like the same brand of humor and it's fantastic and because it's so dry; poor Neuvillette is always just like and you what now? LOL (Clorinde: He already has tons of tea in his office. I'm thinking about a set of legal codices. Wriothesley: That wouldn't happen to be a dig at my lack of legal awareness, would it... Clorinde: I'm sure His Grace doesn't consider the Fortress to be outside the law.)

Which she brings up again in her voiceline (Clorinde: I highly suspect that he keeps quiet about some of the methods he uses, but there's no way we can know) teasing again that he operates outside the law. The other thing about this line (though I don't put it very high, it could be a translation thing) but that she switches from I highly suspect to no way we can know. Why she didn't just say no way I can know, is probably because she does know or she knows she could know if she asked LOL

One of my favorite examples is from his character stories because omg I feel like it's the definition of their humor and it makes me laugh so much ("Why does it feel like you have even more free time than me? Your title wasn’t bought, was it?"

"One moment, please."

So saying, Wriothesley rifled through three drawers before producing several thick documents with a flourish. "Now, let me see... 'excellent management'... 'leading tax contributor'... 'specially granted this title...' Well, what do you know? Good guess, that's pretty much what happened after all.") I just feel like she's not afraid to challenge him with jabs as jokes and he's perfectly fine to take it. But I also think that's saying something because who else knows that they can poke fun at him like that, she knows because she knows him.

4. Work Life Together

I just wish Hoyo would tell us more about it 😩 like is it just because he hires her to do stuff for him? How did that start? Why? Even in the character story above, it's said it was over a business transaction what does that meaaaan? There's no way he, woke up one way and went, you know what time to hire this one Champion Duelist (she's the best but she's still not the only one) to do some secret missions.

When asked, he said it's because she's an independent party (Wriothesley: As a Champion Duelist, Miss Clorinde can be considered to be an independent party. I needed to find an exceptionally capable person to help me get through the impending crisis) but I mean she works for the court idk how that makes her independent? He does say "crisis" so it's likely she knew about a lot of the things going on ahead of time but I don't think he would have ever just hired someone just because of their station. Mainly because in doing so, he trusted her to be in his inner circle of the plan with Sigewinne - who Clorinde also has a relationship with as I went through already - and Neuvillette, two people we know Wriothesley does have canonical history with.

I saw someone say that Clorinde was already staying down there at the time already working with Wriothesley on the mission, so it was easy for her to get Freminet, but I couldn't ever find what in canon pointed to that. She was staying after at least, she was eating dinner there but they weren't expecting the gate to blow that night. You'd assume she'd leave after she told him everything he needed to know. But no it's like middle of the night/early morning and she's right down there with him. So part of the crisis he referred to is letting her in on one of the biggest secrets of Meropide because she knew exactly what to do and was ready and willing to do it.

I also really love Navia's voice line about him because it says that Clorinde knows what the arraignment he had with Callas was otherwise she wouldn't have told Navia it was okay (Navia: Trying to discuss anything with that guy is an exhausting process. Clorinde says I needn't have any reservations about collaborating with him in the scope of our preexisting agreement, but I still shouldn't trust everything that comes out of his mouth.) I imagine Clorinde bullying it out of him to make sure if was a safe arraignment for Navia (and maybe upon learning what it was and how it came about could've been the early steps in how Clorinde learned to trust him too because it's mutual - she's not a mercenary, she takes jobs with him because she also trusts him and what he does). But I also imagine that bit about not trusting a word that comes from his mouth (since Wriothesley hasn't ever lied that I recall, he hides things very well and doesn't clarify to make things appear certain ways, but I don't recall him flat out being deceitful) is either 1. Clorinde teasing him to Navia without her even knowing but it gives Clorinde a little amusement 2. She knows that man is gonna run his mouth one day to tease her and she's laying the foundations now so Navia won't listen to him 🤣

Or Clorinde is helping him keep his mysterious and bad boy persona because she knows he's actually a big softie - all wins to me lol because I genuinely can't see her believing he's untrustworthy; she literally risked her life to stay with him while they waited for Neuvillette, that doesn't sound like a person you didn't trust. Because again as far as I know a Champion Duelist is still not a mercenary.

5. Battle Couple

Which leads me back into my original Roy and Riza comparison, the way they fight together (Wriothesley: Clorinde is the best Champion Duelist you can find. Her combat prowess is already the stuff of legend. I've never fought her myself, but that's because there's never been a need for it.) I saw someone point out how does he know this when he'd likely have to make a special trip just to see her fight. I imagine some is word of mouth considering the phrasing of stuff of legend. Regardless of how he knew initially, he knows now because they've fought together before. He's never fought her, like he said, but they're fought side by side.

They had to. I'm sorry, this is not the delulu brain worms, you cannot tell me they didn't.

They likely had some sort of plan otherwise idk how she would know to shoot the door controls, but she's watching him from a distance, sees his signal of a simple nod and proceeds (she nods back to him but I couldn't find a gif that included it). I say because they didn't know what was going to happen; the plan was probably if it looks bad, shoot the controls I don't care where I am. I don't think it was as specific as I'll just give you a nod it's fine. He could've shouted, made a bigger motion, lots of things really - he didn't because he was literally running for his life and he knew she was watching, she'd see him and know what to do that's why I bring it up. That's why I refuse to believe they've never fought/worked side by side before, you don't just read people like that; you don't just trust people like that, especially two people who it's in their job description to be sus and careful with who you trust. You read faces, eyes, subtle signals from people you know and trust.

It reminded me so much of Roy and Riza in this scene when she can't speak from her injury and he is about to lose his mind and all she needs to do is move her eyes and he gets it.

(I mean, Roy and Riza have literally a lifetime of history, experience, and love for one another, I don't think Wriothesley and Clorinde have known each other as long or have that rich a history, but all I'm saying is I keep seeing them in each other, okay? Okay).

6. Similarities in Story and Interests

I threw this one down at the bottom because I’m not sure if they’re aware of their own similarities. It’s more meta in the sense I see the similarities without having canon to tell me that they know how similar they are. The first being the most obvious in that they were both orphaned as babies, and then were raised with foster parents/guardians until Clorinde was 10 and Wriothesley was a teen (Clorinde at least getting the better deal in that her Master who took her in was unconventional but seemingly cared for Clorinde unlike Wriothesley who had the rug ripped out from under him to see the truth of his family). Clorinde then presumably was looked after by Callas and Wriothesley grew up in Meropide. Both don’t talk about their personal lives often, but in both they’re story quests, they talk about their past pretty openly. So its possible they know, but because Hoyo is too afraid to put them in the same room again, I can’t say.

They also both hate newspapers and paparazzi. Clorinde talks about why she likes Charlotte by alluding to what other journalists put Clorinde through (Clorinde: Unlike some, [Charlotte] doesn't ambush me with her Kamera on my way to work, or follow me to the coffee shop to report on what I'm drinking today... And most commendably of all, she is well aware that I do not do interviews and doesn't nag me about it continuously). Wriothesley we know also turns down interviews frequently (Charlotte: And that's exactly why I'd like you to come conduct interviews with me. You're the best incubators of news, if you haven't noticed — and also, with you around, I'm sure I'll get to see that Duke. Paimon: Are you sure? Hasn't he turned you down several times already?). I imagine its because both have been victims of the journalists turning on them for a front page story (I’m sure everything with Callas was sensationalized, same with Wriothesley when he was a teen and also probably just how criminals are depicted in journalism to begin with).

The last bit comes from the Fontaine Tour Group video since so far the only two playable characters who have displayed knowledge on Remuria. Wriothesley both in the Archon Quests and his Friendship stories (Wriothesley: Then maybe you haven't heard of the story of ancient Remuria. To give you a quick rundown, Fontaine used to be ruled by the Remurian Dynasty) and Clorinde in the Fontaine Tour Group video (Clorinde: …oh, they have a Conch Harp here? Navia: Something wrong? Clorinde: It’s nothing. Probably dates back to the days of Remuria, that’s all). In the video, Navia clearly had listened to Clorinde talk about it because she remembered the connection but she also couldn’t even remember the name after Clorinde just said it, so it’s clearly not common knowledge. I imagine Clorinde was taught about it with her Master due to the ties to the Marechaussee Hunters and Clorinde’s clear love of history. But I also can’t imagine that Clorinde and Wriothesley never discussed both having interests/knowledge in the same niche era of Fontaine’s history. We know that she knew about the splice gate, so I also imagine she knew about the Winglet and therefore they absolutely would’ve talked about Fontaine history and folklore together.

And So

One thing I've seen a lot in this fandom, when others are trying to discredit a ship they try to give proof of pairs that are "more canon" and I didn't do this to try and say they have more canon standing. They aren't seen together all that often, and sometimes we just have to pull the crumbs out of our own analysis and that's okay. I don't like the phrase "more canon" because its canon or its not lol Being in more scenes together doesn't make a pairing more canon unless they're in the scene confessing their love verbally or physically. It just means they have a relationship, whether that's friendship, familial or romantic. How you see a relationship is up to you and you aren't wrong (because there is no right answer - n o s h i p i s c a n o n).

When it comes to Clorinde and Wriothesley, I don't know if Hoyo will ever put them in the same room together again (though they gave me enough crumbs that I need to now clarify pictured/interacting in the same room lol). They're just gonna give us a Character like Wriothesley and just leave him down there to never interact with people 😭 Clorinde's story quest didn't even touch on her being a Champion Duelist. I still have so many questions.

I’m a little peeved with Hoyo to be honest which is a whole other conversation I’ll have on how we went from some of the best storytelling and some of the best characters into some of the blandest storytelling and complete wasted potential. Nothing will make me stop loving what I loved about Fontaine, but it’s incredibly frustrating also feeling like I was lied to my face only because Hoyo caved to fanservice (which is how it looks), completely erasing character stories and relationships they established in the first place.

ALAS, with the new region on the horizon, maybe we’ll finally see some peace as the fandom moves on to a new region. We’ll just have to speculate and answer the questions for ourselves <3

In any regard, I wrote up all this to (cope because I adore them and I run out of content to satisfy my intake on a daily basis) hopefully make someone else also feel better that no, no one was crazy for thinking these two had that good fucking chemistry, because it radiated off the goddamn screen. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise 💙 Also, oh my fucking god I thought that after being in with Genshin since version 1.3 I already had my hyperfixation period back in Liyue nope the fucking prison warden and trial by combat champion decided to ruin my life.

[doe-eyed-fool]

Fear Of The Known

Lucifer x Fem!Angel!Reader

|Chapter Four|

Y/n couldn't seem to rid herself of that off feeling. Something wasn't right, and it was making her anxious. But was there really anything to get worked up over? Not really. And yet, the feeling remained.

She decided later that day, she would go and visit Michael again to calm her nerves. On the way, she had ran into Adam. At his side, like always, was Lute.

"Well if it isn't the mystical babe!" Adam smirks. "Where are you heading off to, sweet thing?" Y/n inwardly cringes. While keeping a proper attitude, she responds. "Hello Adam, I'm on my way to visit Michael."

"Psh, you two are totally fucking aren't you?"

"Is there something I can help you with?" Y/n says, choosing to ignore what he said.

"Didn't deny it." Adam mutters as he elbows Lute. Lute keeps her harden expression, her arms folded behind her back. Adam continues. "Nah, I don't need anything from you. Unless you're looking for a good time, if you know what I mean." He grins mischievously.

"No, thank you." Y/n says curtly. "How was your meeting with Sera?"

"Boring as shit." Adam answers simply. "I see. I assume everything is fine then? There wasn't anything strange that came up during the meeting?" Asked Y/n.

"That's between me and Sera, babe." Adam says, clearly bored with this conversation too.

"Alright. Well then." Y/n walked past him. "Pleasure talking with you, Adam, Lute." Lute said nothing, other than nodding her head.

"Oh trust me, the pleasure's all mine." Adam says, Y/n could practically feel his eyes on her rear. She rolled her eyes and speed up her walk slightly.

Y/n finally made it to Michael's home. She entered and made her way further inside. Normally, she would have needed Michael to portal her to where he was, due to how large his home was. But Y/n grew accustomed to the place over the years, she could easily find him now.

Michael was in the study, passing the time by reading. His head perked up when he heard Y/n approaching. "Y/n." He greets her with a smile. "What brings you by?" He asks, closing the book and setting it aside.

"I wanted to see you. I'm...a bit frazzled at the moment." Y/n answers, feeling somewhat selfish. Though, Michael was always open whenever she needed to talk with him. "What's happened?" He asks, concerned.

"Sera is acting off. Or at least it feels that way. I told her of a vision I had, and she barely question it. Normally the questioning would be non-stop until she's satisfied. But, she didn't seem concerned at all." Y/n explains.

"Is there a reason to be concerned?" Asked Michael. "Charlotte Morningstar will be meeting with Heaven soon." Said Y/n, causing Michael's brows to raise. "What for?" He asked.

"I'm not sure. But whatever it is, Sera didn't seem too concerned. But maybe she was, from how she basically rushed me out the door. She said she needed to speak with Adam about it."

"Is there nothing else you can see from that point?"

Y/n shook her head. "I can only see so far into the future. As time passes, the path will reveal itself further. We can only wait for now."

"I see." Said Michael. "Do you sense any ill intent from Charlotte?"

"No. Nothing like that. You've heard me talk about her. She's so...not demon like at all, despite where she comes from." Y/n crosses her arms. "It makes me think, could there really be demons down there who are like her? Is there any good in the hearts of sinners?"

"That I don't know, Y/n." Said Michael. "But if this Charlotte girl is only good that's down there, well then...That gives me hope that Lucifer has done something to influence that kind of mindset from her."

That made Y/n smile slightly. "You think so?" Michael smiles as well. "I do. And hey, maybe Sera's finally giving you a break. Take advantage of that while you can."

Y/n sighs. "Maybe I will. I might just be overthinking all of this. I'm sure everything's fine."

Everything was not fine. A truly awful vision came to Y/n one week after talking with Sera. Y/n was rushing to find the head Seraphim, desperate to tell her what she's seen.

And even more desperate for answers...

Once she arrived at Sera's residence, and knocked on the door quickly with shaky hands. Unfortunately it was not Sera who answered, but Emily.

"Hi, Y/n! What brings you by?"

Y/n tried her best to conceal her panic as she spoke. "I must speak with Sera right away. It's urgent." Emily's smile dropped as she grew concerned. "Is something wrong?" She asks.

"I...I don't know yet." Y/n lied, wanting to spare Emily's feelings. Emily agreed to let her see Sera, welcoming her in. Emily lead Y/n to Sera's office.

"Ah, Y/n. How can I help you?" Asked Sera. Y/n furrowed her brows, but she kept a calm tone as she spoke. "I need to speak with you Sera. I had another vision."

Sera looked to Emily. "Emily?" Emily nods before leaving the room to give them privacy. Sera folded her hands. "What's happened?"

"I am in disbelief Sera." Y/n began, her voice dipping as anger finally settled in. "How could you? How could you allow for something so cruel to happen?"

Sera narrows her eyes. "What are you saying?"

"The exterminations." Sera's eyes widened. "You allowed Adam and his angels to down to Hell and murder thousands of people! How could you, Sera?"

Sera's expression hardened. "Those people are dangerous. I did what was best for everyone in Heaven. They were uprising."

"Uprising? Sera, nothing in my visions warned of any sort of uprising!"

"Perhaps that is because I took charge. Hell's population is growing too large. One way or another, it was going to become a serious problem." Sera stood from her desk and turned her back to Y/n. "I for one am not going to sit by and do nothing, and just allow Heaven to fall into harms way."

Y/n was seething with anger. "I didn't allow Lucifer to bring harm to Heaven! Don't you dare insist I would ever allow anything to bring harm to us!"

Sera turned to face you, her eyes sharp with anger. "You had the chance to warn us about Lucifer's revolt and you did nothing!" Before Y/n could get the chance to argue back, Sera spoke again.

"We have souls to protect here, and I can not have any more mistakes that will put those souls at risk. And Heaven is safe, because of the tough choices I had to make. And if a few demons must die for the sake of everyone in Heaven's safety, then so be it."

"There are human souls down there Sera!" Y/n exclaimed.

Sera narrows her eyes and turns away from you again. "They were human, once. And they had their chance."

Y/n could have stormed out right then, but that was not the only vision she saw.

"Well. Because of your little exterminations, Adam will be killed."

Sera sharply turns her head over her shoulder. "What?"

"In six months, Adam will go down to Heaven for the extermination, but he will not return." Y/n glares at Sera. "So. Are you willing to send Adam to his death, Sera?"

Sera returns the glare, she looks away from Y/n again. "If you have nothing else to say, then you may leave."

Oh, Y/n had plenty more to say. But she would not waste her breath on someone like her any further. Clearly, Sera was in no mood to negotiate.

And she never will be.

So, Y/n turns and walks out of her office. She stormed past Emily, ignoring her as she tried to ask what was wrong. Y/n went back to her home, still furious, but trying to calm herself.

How could Sera have kept this a secret for so long? She's been lying to everyone, even Emily. Well, Y/n most certainly wasn't going to let her get away with this.

This extermination plot of hers is over, and Y/n was going to make sure of that.

As soon as she reach for the door, it swung open. And in walked Adam and Lute.

"Hey babe. Heard you and Sera had quite the argument." A wicked grin formed on Adam's face. "She sent me over to keep the peace."

Y/n took a step back as Adam approached her. Lute smirked as she shut the door and locked it.

"So. How about we settle it, right now?" Adam chuckles darkly.

Tags-

@bloody-delusion-expert

@simbalioness

[aquamarine-oceanfront]

Unofficial Bunny Maloney FAQ

Since Saberspark's reviewing the show today, I figured it would be in everyone's best interests to write this up now - people new to Bunny Maloney can get answers to several common questions in one go, while people already familiar with it can send this to others whenever necessary. (For what it's worth, I honestly think even the biggest fans of the series might learn something new here.) I know the show's creator posted a short FAQ of his own about a month ago, but I figured it was worth treading some of the same ground while going more in-depth.

Disclaimer: I'm trying my best to be as factual as possible here, but I cannot completely rule out the possibility that I am wrong or misleading about something here. Please let me know if something's amiss, or if you've seen other common questions that could be added! Similarly, for authenticity's sake, all quotes are presented exactly how they were originally written.

I've divided this post into short and long sections - they cover the same questions, but the latter is more in-depth and is replete with source links. If you're in a hurry, then here are the brief answers:

"Was Bunny Maloney really meant for children?" No, not originally. Original creator Nicolaï "Méko" Chauvet intended for the show to be aimed at teenagers first and foremost (with some appeal to younger children), but MoonScoop insisted it be targeted solely at kids. Director Stéphane Stoll fought to keep true to the original intent, hence why the final product still has a lot of adult content.

"Does Méko have any missing English episodes?" No. All he has are 8-10 episodes of (an early version of) the French dub that MoonScoop gave him back in the day.

"What species is Charlotte?" While many sources (including her English voice actor and two lines in the show itself) assume she's a cow, Méko actually intended for her to be a goat.

"Is Jean-François's English voice actor the same as the main character in Hatred?" I'm not so sure about that. Tom Clarke-Hill was definitely part of the English cast, but the credits don't specify which characters he voiced, and I haven't found anything that would definitively prove he voiced Jean-François. (For that matter, Hatred uses a pseudonym while crediting its player character's voice actor - it's commonly believed Clarke-Hill did it, but I haven't found any hard evidence otherwise.)

"Will there be a season 2?" There's no definitive plans just yet (and please don't bother Méko about it). Not much to add here - he's stated many a time that he'd love to revive Bunny Maloney, but there's nothing concrete at the time I'm writing this.

Below the jump are my full answers to the same questions:

(V1.1 [12/14/24]: Lightly edited to correct some errors I missed)

Was Bunny Maloney really meant for children?

This is surprisingly complicated to answer in full, even if the short answer seems simple enough.

While Méko first came up with Bunny Maloney (the character) in 1998, the history of the TV series specifically began with L'attaque du poulpe rouge géant ("Attack of the Giant Red Octopus" in English), a short Flash animation he directed in the early 2000s. As he wrote in an email to YouTuber Li Speaks earlier in 2024:

l'attaque du poulpe rouge geant, and it's total freedom of speech, references and mature content was aiming only 2 targets in my mind : Internet of course, free content, like my friends pushed me to do, and anime conventions, where it have a big succes because it was clearly dedicated to all we loved in japanese pop culture.

He did not originally intend for it to be a pilot, mind you. Méko only decided to try and rework the concept into a full TV series after the short won the "Netsurfers Award" at the 2003 Annecy Festival, producing a pitch bible for what was then called Pinpin le Lapin. In the aforementioned email exchange, he clearly states twice that he intended for the show to target a teenage audience. (He does say at one point that "we wanted to keep an interest for the big brothers and sisters and make them watching buny too, like the simpsons at the beginning." Tying into this, the cover of the pitch bible gives the intended audience as "8 year olds and over" - Méko later explained that "'over' was more important than '8'" here.)

However, these plans were repeatedly challenged as the series entered production. According to the tweet I just linked, the primary investor insisted that they exclusively target teenagers & adults, forcing the bible to be rewritten accordingly. MoonScoop, the primary production company, had the opposite problem - their management was equally insistent that the series target kids and kids alone, watering down Méko's original intent. (He claims in the same email exchange as before that the company was "a real army of 40 years old parisian mothers at that time." They were also the ones responsible for renaming the series Bunny Maloney - they reasoned that English-speaking audiences would find it funnier, ignoring Méko's warnings about potential confusion with the singer of the same name.)

However, director Stéphane Stoll spent a significant amount of time and effort sticking to the original target demographic (according to Méko's emails). His work certainly paid off, as evident by the amount of adult humor in the final product. MoonScoop, for the most part, seemed to continue treating Bunny Maloney as a children's program - their official site billed it as being for ages "6 and up," for instance. (The lone exception is an official PowerPoint presentation that gives the show's genre as "adult-escent’ comedy, action adventure!") The tension between the disparate target audiences actually impacted its premiere in France: originally scheduled to debut on Canal+ Family near the end of March 2009 (specifically as part of Cartoon+, a then-new series showing episodes of various contemporary cartoons), it was pulled at the last minute because the channel decided it was unsuitable for children. (It ultimately premiered on the network three months later, albeit in the early afternoon instead of its original evening timeslot.)

I haven't examined every single non-French channel that aired the show, but all the ones I'm aware of were definitely meant for kids. The two most familiar ones definitely were: Kabillion (in the US) is dedicated to children's cartoons, while Kix (in the UK) specifically targeted 7 to 12 year-old boys.

Does Méko have any missing English episodes?

He does not. All he has are a few early French episodes (between eight and ten) that MoonScoop gave him back when the series was in production.

What species is Charlotte?

She's a goat. I don't blame people for getting confused, since Bunny and Candy explicitly call her a cow in two separate episodes - even Phillipa Alexander, her English voice actor, once described her as such on her website. However, Meko originally designed her with a shorter tail than in the show as produced - closer to a goat than a cow. (His own artwork also refers to her as a goat quite frequently.) But don't take my word for it - take his:

HEY, YANKEES : CHARLOTTE IS A GOAT !

Is Jean-François's English voice actor the same as the main character in Hatred?

I can't give a definitive answer to this either way. In case you didn't already know: Hatred is a video game released in 2015 that attracted massive amounts of controversy because of its extraordinarily violent content. Its player character, officially named "the Antagonist" but popularly known as "Not Important," is voiced by someone credited as "Clint Westwood" - a pre-release interview with the developers confirms the actor used a fake name to stay anonymous. Many people believe his real identity is Tom Clarke-Hill, but to my knowledge he has never confirmed this (perhaps unsurprisingly) - it's just speculation rooted in comparisons to his other roles. (As an example, this Steam forum post notes that "the Antagonist" sounds similar to Clarke-Hill's performance as Karl Fairburne in the Sniper Elite series.)

As for Bunny Maloney: Tom Clarke-Hill was 100% part of the English voice cast, as you can see below.

However, there's no mention of which roles these six actors took on. While some of them have provided that information elsewhere (like their own websites or, in Matt Wilkinson's case, a demo reel), I haven't been able to find a credible source saying that Clarke-Hill voiced Jean-François. (If you find or already know one, please let me know!)

Also, there's another, possibly more important question to consider: since Jean-François's lines sound exactly the same in French, does he even have an English voice actor? I'm genuinely not sure - he is the only character who always uses the French pronunciation of his own name (while the others tend to say it more like "John-François"), but that's hardly definitive evidence.

Will there be a season 2?

I think Méko answered this succintly in his own FAQ:

For now, i would be more than happy to do season 2, it has been in my dreams for years and i will do everything in my power for that, but there isn't anything official yet. Please don't ask me "when" […] but be sure i will do an announce when the time has come!

[milfswriter]

okay hear me out on this request lol

Rhea x Reader where reader wanted to surprise Rhea and buys a box of those aphrodisiac chocolates, then Rhea eats one of them thinking its regular chocolate and goes into a match. She can't focus at all during the match because of the aphrodisiac and is thinking of reader the whole time which almost costs her the match. horny + angry Rhea = thisisgonnabealongnight.jpg if youre not comfortable with writing this since its smut i 100% understand anyways i love your work and hope you're doing well :)))

it's 3 am and I'm bored so have this ig. I feel like I exaggerated the effects of the chocolate lmao.

Mistake

Rhea Ripley x Reader Summary: Rhea eats from the chocolate box you bought and almost immediately regrets it. Notes and warning: not proofread tbh, aphrodisiac, smut (obv), cunnilingus, fingering (Rhea receiving), strapon mentioned, locker room sex, slightly bottom!rhea

"Hey" you placed a kiss to your girlfriend's cheek as you got into the locker room, placing a heart-shaped box in her locker before she closed it.

"What's that?" she smiled, there were still a few days until your anniversary so she was a bit confused as to what was the occasion.

"Just..chocolate" you failed to hold back your smirk which made her narrow her eyes at you before humming.

"I'll be going first 'cause I'm on commentary" You gave her a quick kiss and made your way to the door. "Oh, and..don't eat those!" You warned her, you really did.

----

Rhea shrugged before untying the little red bow on top of the box, opening it to see two layers of chocolate. Surely eating a few won't do any harm, she needed the extra energy for her match anyway.

She closed the box, not bothering to tie the ribbon back to hide her crime as she was already late. She walked to the gorilla and waited until it was her turn.

She felt...weird. She assumed it was the sugar since she hadn't had any in a while except for energy drinks but gulped as her knees almost buckled when she saw you with the hairstylist, doing the last touches on your hair.

"Hey..good luck" you squeezed her hand before your theme played and you came out behind the curtain.

Her vision was clouded by your scent, she couldn't focus to save her bloody life! it wasn't any opponent, it was Charlotte Flair. That little snake will do anything to embarrass her in front of you. You were not going to be on ringside this time, you'll be WATCHING her as Charlotte kicks her ass. She won't let this happen. She didn't want it to seem like she could only win when you were there.

"There you go, Rhea," a staff member said, pulling her out of the deep trance she was in as her theme played.

You watched with a grin as Rhea did her stomp, glaring at the cameras before making her way to the ring. She looked tense, almost dizzy.

As her theme stopped playing, she leaned against the corner of the ring, trying as hard she could not to make eye contact with you as you sat next to Corey with your legs crossed as you praised her.

"One Riptide from Rhea will send the so-called 'queen' spiraling. Mark my words, Cole!"

---------

Fuck, she couldn't contain herself. An intense throbbing between her legs began to form and she held onto the ropes as Charlotte did her entrance.

What the hell was happening to her? is she having a heart attack?. Damn it she shouldn't have drunk all those energy drinks that week.

She turned her head to see you and immediately regretted it when she saw you already looking at her with a smirk. You looked..sexy. Extra sexy that she didn't know how she let you walk out in those clothes, no one deserved to see you like this but her.

She ignored all the taunts Charlotte was doing to provoke her as she stared at you. She was brought back to reality by the bell and looked at Charlotte who gave her a cocky smirk.

-------

Halfway through the match, you decided you'd leave commentary and be on ring side because if you didn't, Rhea would be taking the Figure 8 in no time.

She delivered a big boot to Charlotte, sending her falling on her back. The crowd cheered before Rhea looked at you briefly then turned her head back to her opponent.

She couldn't stop thinking about you..your breasts, how full and round they'd look whenever she'd squeeze them. You lips, soft and tasy. and Oh your p-.

"RHEA!" Your voice interrupted her train of thought as you saw Charlotte coming her way looking for a spear.

Before she knew it, she was thrown across the ring and rolled out of it in pain. "What the fuck are you doing! Focus!" You hissed through your teeth, placing a hand on her thigh and saw her looking at your hand and bit her lip.

You gulped in realization, "You..You didn't eat the chocolate..did you?" Her eyes widened and it hit her like a ton of bricks, it was the chocolate!

"I thought I told you not to open it!" you sighed before hearing the ref counting.

You pulled her up by the arm and pushed her into the ring without another word in frustration. "Finish this!"

She wished she could, but Charlotte was taking advantage of the situation.

------

Rhea hit Charlotte with an Avalanche Riptide, pinning her tiredly with an arm over her torso.

You held onto the rope in anticipation, gulping when you saw Charlotte's feet trying to reach the rope.

"One! Two! Three!" Rhea couldn't believe this was finally over, it's been going on for 15 minutes and the throbbing is getting even more intense and all she wants is to take you to the locker room because she isn't sure she'll last until the hotel.

Her theme played as you slid into the ring, raising her arm in victory before the cameras were cut. "Please.." she whispered and you shushed her, taking her hand backstage.

She was following clumsily behind you as you headed to the locker room. "Congrats Rhea" you heard Dakota say but didn't bother to wait for Rhea to chat with her.

"T..Thanks" As you reached the locker room, you opened Rhea's locker and took the box, placing it in its original bag before taking your stuff.

"Follow me to the car.."

"No!" she blocked the way to the door with her much larger frame. "I..I need you now..please"

"Wh..here?!" she nodded, getting on her knees after locking the door, and began unbuttoning your jeans, knowing full well you were packing underneath.

"sit on the bench" you ordered, "Come on..I wanna eat you out before you explode on the spot" you laughed but she released a sigh of relief.

She stood up and, with your help, unbuttoned her tights and pulled them down her legs alongside her underwear.

"You..are dripping" you whispered in her ear. If she's gonna walk around and do what you told her not to, you won't let it go easily.

She spread her legs, feeling your breath on her inner thigh. "No teasing..please" you placed slow kisses all over her inner thighs, coating them with lipstick before spreading them even more, she was absolutely soaked.

you spread her lips with your thumbs before giving in and licking a long stripe. "oh, fuck.." was heard before you dived into her with your tongue.

"Such a fucking slut" you mumbled before going back to what you were doing. She scowled before moaning again, biting back whatever comment she was gonna make in hopes of you getting into it already.

She threw her head back, sighing and savoring the feeling of your lips wrapped around her clit before you decide to be a tease again. Shit..what the fuck did they put in that chocolate.

"I told you not to eat it!" you laughed nipping on her labia, and she knew she must have been thinking out loud.

"How was I supposed to know they were spik- Oh!" she was cut off with a guttural groan when a finger entered her, stretching her for you even though you knew there was no need for that.

You added another finger and you know she was close with how tight she was clenching around you. "I'm...close"

"Do you deserve to come?" you asked, slowing down your movement for a bit.

"Please I'm sorry..I..needed that sugar, fuck!" you let out a chuckle at her state, picking up the pace again and wrapping your lips back around her bundle of nerves.

you felt her fingers pulling slightly on your scalp as her legs shook on either side of your head, trying hard not to suffocate you with them. "that's it..cum for me, Demi" you knew what saying her real name did to her, you didn't know why but you never complained.

To bring her even closer to the edge, you sneaked your free hand up her body and squeezed her boob through her leather bra, almost immediately causing the coil in her stomach to snap.

You shut her up with your fingers in her mouth, you were sure everybody knew what was going on in there but you didn't want them to know what Rhea Ripley sounds like when she's cumming for you.

She looked down at you with a grin as you lapped at her cum, placing one last kiss on her clit as her fingers played with your hair while she caught her breath.

"You done in there you freaks?! I need my fucking stuff" You heard Shayna slamming her hand against the door.

"Are we?" you looked at Rhea with a laugh as she shook her head.

"Not even close. But..let's continue in the hotel, I wanna have my way with you" she got up, giving you a hard kiss before putting her pants back on.

"Fuck..how many did you fucking eat!"

"..Three. I thought I was dying out there" You let out a howl at her state, she looked so disheveled and fucked out even though you two just began.

She unlocked the door, facing Shayna who was crossing her arms. "Was it that good or are you just a fucking show off cause you got y/n?"

"oh, believe me-"

"nope! let's go!" you didn't know whether to be offended at Shayna doubting you were good in bed or flattered.

Rhea laughed at your flushed face, taking her stuff and following you to the parking lot.

Taglist:

@obsessedwithwwewomen@ara-a-bird@jungwoospeach@neganwifey25-blog@yourmisosoup@cameronsdruthers@dementedtrashcat @sunnnyshark @1c4ntg3ty0u0ffmym1nd 

[rey-jake-therapist]

About the AMA with McPayne and the "it was just a cool shot" I haven't seen some things mentioned.

Charlotte Brändström was the director of that scene. And, that scene was filmed during the writer's strike so McPayne couldn't be involved during the filming of that scene.

If McPayne didn't intend it to be anything more during the writing of the scene, a director might have had a different intent.

I mean, you're right, but he would definitely know if there was an intent. But again, the fact that he didn't straight out deny it leaves all the possibility that it may have been intentional.

Honestly, I'm not sure I would have given so much thought to this shot myself, if they hadn't doubled down when they filmed the wake of Galadriel.

There's also the sound to take into account : when Galadriel woke up, there was not only the video effect, but an eerie sound. And if it says anything regarding the "presence" of Sauron watching her, it could very well explain why Payne and McKay won't say anything about it yet.

First shot : Sauron has a very keen eye, we know that. He could see Adar's army from an extremely long distance, and who knows even if he wasn't able to see Galadriel and Adar talking in the tent. There's much we don't know yet about his visual capacities. Same of his hearing abilities ;) With this in mind, there's nothing extraordinary for him in being able to see Galadriel down the cliff.

Second shot : Galadriel was in an entirely new place, and Sauron was probably far gone. Meaning, he wasn't standing above her this time. If they admitted now that Sauron was capable of seeing her while being a different place, it would be admitting that he created a bond with her when he stabbed her with Morgoth's place, because it would be the only reason why he could do that. And that, they won't do.

I've often seen assumed, just as late as today, that Sauron could see the three Elven rings after they were forged, because "he can see everything, everywhere", and because the sight of the three Elven rings turned into his Eye, at the end of season 1. He also had a smug smile on his face implying he was happy with what he had just seen.

Except, except... During the finals, we got the proof that Sauron didn't see the rings, through his reaction to seeing Nenya:

"it is even more beautiful that Celebrimbor led me to believe",

is what he told Galadriel. Meaning, he had never seen it yet. I'm still very much convinced that he was somehow present in the forge when they made the Elven rings, as it was hinted here :

But the claim that he literally sees everything is taking these scenes way too literally imho. If he could see everything, everywhere, or if he can read minds as I also saw suggested, how comes he still gets surprised ? If he was really capable of "seeing everything" with his super Eye, why would he need spies ?

So, my guess is that he can feel a lot of things happening, for example : he felt that the rings were made according to his design, because he's connected to the rings, and to Galadriel as well... Hence the satistifed smug. He's also capable to collect datas about the people he connects with, when he catches them into his mind palace (or rather.... invades theirs ?) and builds illusions based on their personal memories. But I don't think that he literally "sees" everything, as if they were happening right in front of him.

So where am I going with these ideas? Simple : I think that if we're right that this visual effect was used to tell us that Sauron was watching Galadriel, the fact that he was capable to see Galadriel wake up in the "safe haven protected by the rings" informs us that because he created this bond between them, he can see her, something he wasn't able to do before unless she was within his reach.

[lottiembae]

𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒐𝒏𝒍𝒚 𝒐𝒏𝒆𝒔; shauna shipman x fem!reader

Summary: shauna shipman sees y/n differently after that night.

Warnings: fluff, smut, slow burn.

Note: English is not my first language.

"Why are you ginger?!" Some of them exclaimed at the unison.

Shauna rolls her eyes, blushing a little. "I lost a bet." She just said, letting her suitcase on the floor.

Jackie bit her smile, knowing the reason, after all it was a bet between them. The blonde crossed her arms and sat down, the salt on her hair wavering her locks. Shauna glares at her, giving her a sarcastic look.

"Okay. You can change upstairs, you staying with Y/N. Right corner, second door." Lottie informed her, eyeing the pair of friends discreetly.

They all have an entire week in Charlotte's beach house in Lake Key, a big house for all of them. A paradise they can enjoy.

Shauna hummed, scanning the living room and not seeing the mentioned one there, assuming she is upstairs or out in the pool with the rest. She is grateful to have Y/N like a roomie, she is the most tidy of all their friends. The -now- ginger girl changed into a bikini, grabbing her sunscreen, book and going downstairs.

The heat hit her body when she walked in the back garden, her friends having fun in the pool or laying on the grass chatting. Shauna laid a towel next to Taissa in the grass, depositing her things there and throwing herself in the pool, purposely doing it and smirking when they gasp and call her name.

"Shauna!" Y/N exclaimed happily, swimming towards her. "You look beautiful." She innocently said.

If this compliment came from one of her other friends, she would probably show her middle finger. But it's Y/N, the unique innocence of the group, Laura Lee left behind that adjective a long time ago.

"Thanks." Shauna muttered, clearing her throat and reciprocating the hug.

Y/N giggles, separating from the embrace but remaining close. "How's college?"

"Good! Stressing but really good. How about you? I heard you struggled at first." Shauna asks, rubbing the drops from her eyes.

"Yeah... Van went there a few days. I know, I'm like a child. But I spent years seeing your faces and then I didn't." Y/N explained, shrugging.

Shauna gives her a lipped smile. She struggled the first weeks too, used to see them, hang out and play soccer. "I don't think so. I understand what you mean." She shrugs too.

A splash interrupted their conversation, moving their faces to the side avoiding the water hit their faces. Another trail of curses from the ones sunbathing were heard, Natalie and Van ignored them with big smirks on their faces.

"Y/N, Jackie wanted you to go with her." Van commented.

Shauna saw how Y/N bit her lip but nod nonetheless, waving at them and walking out from the pool.

"Poor Y/N. Jackie is trying to corrupt her." Natalie hummed at Shauna, her eyes focused on the mentioned.

"Why?" Shauna asks, following her gaze. Jackie held Y/N's hand and went into the house, Lottie following behind.

"She said 'Y/N needs to wake up and have fun'." Van replied, imitating Jackie's voice. "Usually Lottie keeps an eye on Jackie, just in case." The redhead explains.

Shauna rolls her eyes, so typical of Jackie. However she could understand why, the blonde doesn't want people to mess with Y/N and maybe she has in mind this summer to make her less innocent.

The rest of the day Shauna inverted to catch time with her friends and finish the book she was reading this past day. When Jackie and Y/N returned, the first one had a mischievous smirk on her lips, a pallid Y/N travelled behind with Lottie wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

"Where were you guys?" Taissa is the first to ask.

"Discovering the world." Jackie mysteriously said, sitting in a chair and quitting her big black t-shirt, showing her soft orange bikini.

They all frowned by her answer. "I'm afraid to ask... But what did you do to her?" Natalie asks, throwing the uno cards on the towel, piercing her blue eyes on Jackie Taylor.

"Show them." Jackie says at Y/N, smiling reassuringly at her. "It was part of the bet." She shrugs her shoulders.

Lottie put herself in front of Y/N, clearly seeing the struggles on her face and deciding to put a stop. "Enough Jackie. She did it, let her be comfortable."

Shauna squinted her eyes when heard Jackie said bet. Internally she rolled her eyes, what have Jackie with bets? And why does her opponent always lose?

Y/N gave Lottie a grateful look and went to sit down away from Jackie, it needed to be something big when Y/N did it. Van muttered something and stepped towards Y/N, bringing a chair with themselves and sitting next to her. Shauna kept an eye on them while Natalie and Taissa tried to worm out what she did to her.

"It's sexy." Jackie was the only thing she said before walking in again, muttering something about starting to fix up to party up.

Taissa ran after her, the group dissolving slowly to follow Jackie's steps. Shauna waited for Y/N and Van to join her when she stood up and they walked towards her direction.

The three walked in and Van disappeared to the left once they were upstairs, making Y/N and Shauna snort when they commented something about waiting an hour for Taissa to be ready.

"It's a good thing that we have our own bathroom in our bedrooms." Shauna commented, opening the door to their shared bedroom. Y/N hummed behind her, her brown eyes catches her red eyes and the dry cheeks. "Do you want to go shower first?" She offers, letting her things on her bed next to the window.

"No, you can go first. I'm going to see what I can wear." Y/N gave her a smile, going to the closet and opening it.

Shauna muttered okay and grabbed some comfortable clothes, disappearing in the fancy bathroom. She doesn't get too late there, putting her clothes on quickly and brushing her hair while coming back to the bedroom.

"All yours." She said at Y/N, seeing her sitting on her bed and watching outside hugging her knees.

"Those jeans stand out your ass." Y/N giggling said when Shauna gave her back at her. Shauna blushed, letting her brush on her bed. "Shit, it made you feel uncomfortable? I don't say it it's like a bad thing." Y/N rants out, standing up and explaining with her hands.

The compliment deepens her blush, the burn on cheeks worsen it. "It's okay, Y/N. You should shower up, I don't want to hear Natalie bark out later." She avoided it, chuckling nervously by her own comment.

Y/N nods, grabbing her clothes and going in. While Shauna waits for Y/N, she decides to put her clothes in her part of the closet. She was the last to approach there, the others coming two days earlier. She finished and Y/N didn't come out, she is really taking so long.

"I'm ready! Sorry to take so long." Y/N opened the door and came out with a summer yellow and white dress, her burn cheeks framing her beauty. She let out a giggle while putting her earrings when saw Shauna looking at her with her jaw dropped, her brown eyes looking her up and down. "I'm that bad?" She briefly pouts, looking at her dress.

Shauna shakes her head, clearing her throat. "N-No!" She stammered, closing her eyes momentarily. "You look beautiful, Y/N! I just..." Shauna thinks hard for something else to say, her blush intensifying. "You look great." She said poorly, biting her lower lip cursing herself in her mind.

Y/N let out a grin, happily to hear her friend compliment her. "I'm grabbing my purse and we can go down." She let her brush on her bed, just like Shauna and do what she said.

When they approached the living room, some whistling from their friends were heard. "Damn, Y/N! You look hot." Natalie says lowly, eyeing Y/N.

Laura Lee let out a chuckle and pinched Y/N's cheeks. "Stop, Nat! She is blushing." The blonde kindly says, rubbing her hand up and down on her back. "But she is right." She whispered in her ear, however Shauna heard her, making her jaw clenched.

"Thank you girls." Y/N shyly said, side hugging Laura Lee and later Natalie, intertwining her arm with hers.

"Woah! You worked on that ass." Van shocked said, stepping next to her and their jaw dropped when her blue eyes met Y/N's figure. "I died and I went to heaven?"

Shauna shakes her head with a small smile while the others laugh. Their laughter intensified when someone else cleared her throat behind them, a smug Taissa was there with her arms crossed about her chest, raising an eyebrow.

"And you come back to actually die." Natalie smugly said. Van rolled their eyes, glaring at her. The dyed blonde put her hands in the air, but her smirk remains.

"Look at her." Van leaned on Taissa and whispered, signaling with their head towards Y/N.

Taissa rolled her eyes and stepped down, going to the kitchen winking at Y/N when passed by her side, Y/N gave her a sheepish smile and Van trailed behind her.

"Damn, girl!" A raspy voice said behind Shauna, smacking her ass.

"Jackie!" Shauna hissed. However Jackie chuckles to stop abruptly when step next to her, her doe eyes focusing on Y/N.

Lottie passed them and winked at Y/N, making a gesture with her hands at her. "We are going out now!" She hummed, going to the front door.

Natalie made a signal with her hands, stopping them. "We need to check on her all night. I'm not letting any dude rub her up."

"Who?" Y/N asks, confused.

They all looked at each other.

•••

"My head hurts..." Jackie muttered when she got downstairs, sitting in the bar stool next to Shauna and leaning her head on her shoulder, a brief pout on her face.

Shauna snorted, but that simple sound made her flinch, Jackie too. Last night all of them had fun, well, not all of them, they made a bet (yes, other) and Laura Lee lost, meaning that she needed to take care of them (Y/N).

"Be quiet, Shauna." Jackie groaned.

Taissa sat down with a water bottle next to the pair, Van offering to make the lunch that day, since surprisingly they barely drank last night. Lottie offered to help the redhead, but Van pushed her next to Taissa and declined her offer with a gentle smile, making the three people sitting there release a relief breath.

"Where are the others?" Jackie raised her head on Shauna's shoulder, her eyes half open looking at Lottie and Taissa.

Taissa shrugged. "I just came down."

"Nat is asleep. Laura Lee and Y/N are in the pool." Lottie informed them in a low voice, leaning her head in her hand tiredly.

Jackie hummed just in time when Y/N came inside giggling with Laura Lee flying behind her with a grin.

"That smells good, Van. Do you need some help?" Y/N kindly asks, giving a smile to her friends there. Jackie called her with her hands, once Y/N approached Jackie and sat her down on her lap.

"Actually, yes please. Can you cut the vegetables?" The redhead requested her.

Y/N agreed, fighting with Jackie to release her. "Jackie! I need help Van." She said giggling.

"A kiss and I leave you." The blonde demanded, making Shauna roll her eyes.

Y/N didn't think about it too much, kissing her cheek a few times. Jackie unwrapped both arms from her body content when Y/N did what she asked.

Laura Lee sat down next to Lottie, massaging her shoulders with a smile. Shauna gazes at them, curious. Lately, she noticed how those two spent more time together, maybe the fact that they are going to the same college has something to do with it. It's not like Lottie and Laura didn't get along in the past, the brunette spent an amount of time defending Laura Lee from bullies.

Shauna decided to help too, letting a whining Jackie sit alone. She put on the cutlery and offered to wake up Natalie when the food was ready. The lunch passed without too much energy from half of them, the only conversation heard was between Laura Lee, Van and Y/N. Once they are done, Lottie shoves them out and cleans the dirty dishes, but a stubborn Natalie stays and helps her.

"You two put sunscreen on!" Jackie threw at Shauna and Y/N two bottles of it. "I don't want you two to get serious damage for not taking care of your skin." The blonde sternly said.

Shauna opened an eye and saw her stern look on her. She doesn't bother Y/N doing it, because she knows that Y/N is putting sunscreen. She rolled her eyes and opened the top, putting some cream on her burned cheeks.

"Don't forget the rest of your body." Jackie sarcastically said with a smile before she lay down on her towel, next to Shauna.

Y/N gave her a funny look, holding her laugh. Shauna pokes her tongue out, throwing the sunscreen at her when she finishes.

"Jackie! Shauna threw the sunscreen at me." Y/N childish said, laughing when Shauna gave her an offended look.

Jackie gazed at Shauna with a suspicious look, but holding a laugh for Y/N's behaviour.

"I thought she wanted it." Shauna made an excuse, biting her lip. She shrugs her shoulders, waiting for Jackie to look away and give Y/N a warning look, standing up and running after her. She caught her quickly, Y/N was still laughing between her arms. "You regret it." She muttered, throwing Y/N into the pool with a smirk.

A scream fell from her mouth but she was cut when Shauna threw her in the pool. "Shauna!" She exclaimed, wiping her eyes. Shauna has an amused smirk painted on her lips.

"What happened?" Van came, a hawaiian shirt on.

"Van! she threw me here because she can't be an adult." Y/N pointed with a finger at Shauna.

The brunette gasped. "Me!? What about you? You can't be an adult." Shauna exclaimed indignantly, looking at Van, who has an amused smirk on their face, annoying Shauna more.

Van bit their lip and wink to Y/N. Shauna saw it and gasped offended. The redhead pushes her once she stays looking at Y/N. "Sorry, Shauna. I tripped." They feigned regret, but their blue eyes lit with mischief.

"Van." Shauna hissed, scowling next to Y/N, who is laughing by her side.

Y/N wrapped her arms around her shoulder and hugged her. However Shauna nudged her rib, but she missed and nudged her boob, making Y/N let out a pain sound.

"Are you okay?" Shauna gazes at her with worry, seeing the pain on her face. "I don't want to hit that zone..."

"I'm fine." Y/N breath out, putting a hand on her chest.

Shauna notices something when her eyes fall to her chest unconsciously. "Do you have a piercing?" She asks incredulously. All of the people who can wear it, Y/N is not one of them.

Y/N blushed and looked briefly at Van. This one wears a worried expression, not hearing Shauna question. "Yes... I did yesterday."

The ginger opened her eyes and mouth. An idea popping in her mind. "Wait... That's why you all disappeared?" Y/N nodded, still with a hand on her chest.

"I'm going inside." Y/N whispered, going out of the pool and after wrapping a towel around her, she got inside. Shauna felt a little bad, even if she didn't want to give that hit intentionally.

Van patted her back and muttered a reassuring word. When minutes passed and Y/N didn't come out, Shauna decided to check on her. She walked towards their shared bedroom, finding it empty but the bathroom's door closed. She knocked a few times and called her name.

"You can come in." Y/N said.

Shauna opened the door and stopped on her tracks when saw Y/N topless, a red shadow covering her cheeks. "Is it okay?" She asks in a low voice, avoiding her naked chest.

"I think so. It has a red mark but nothing serious." Y/N explained.

Her brown eyes fell to her chest, a metal piercing on her left boob. It seems a little inflamed around the nipple, but that's all. She saw how Y/N put on some cream there.

"It hurt you?" Shauna whispered.

Y/N raised her head and saw a sad expression on her face, her half wet ginger hair covering part of her cheeks, her brown eyes showing more of the colour.

"Don't worry, Shawn. I'm fine." Y/N reassuringly said, giving a smile.

Shauna rolled her eyes. "Don't call me that." She said in a hushed tone. She hates that they call her with that name. She removed her hair from her vision and walked out, sitting on her bed and waited for Y/N to finish.

Y/N came out and sat down on her bed, now with her purple bikini on. Shauna gazes at her, every gesture silently. She wanted to ask some questions, but she doesn't want to overstep. The other raised her eyes to her and watched her expression, standing up and stepping towards her.

"Don't think about it. Let's go out." She grabs her hand and pulls her up. Shauna gave her a lipped smile, wrapping an arm around her waist.

"It's kinda hot." She murmurs, suppressing a laugh when Y/N turns to look at her with raised eyebrows. "I'm surprised you did it. You can use it against Nat when she tells you you need to loosen up." She said joking.

"I will keep it in mind." Y/N said with a thinking face.

•••

That evening they decided to go sightseeing in the small town. Shauna and Jackie split up from their friends and went by their count, sharing the last news on their lives since they are going to different colleges.

Shauna licks her chocolate ice cream, walking by the promenade. Jackie ranting by her side eating her vanilla ice cream.

"That's Y/N?" Jackie interrupted, her eyes focusing in the distance. Shauna followed her eyes and saw not far away Y/N sitting in a bench with Taissa braiding her hair.

They walked towards the pair, waving to an enthusiastic Y/N waving at them. Jackie grabbed her chin and pecked her cheek, offering her ice cream at her.

"No, thank you."

Shauna sat down next to her, Jackie sat down on her lap. She is not bothered by it, actually she is used to this gesture. She remembers when Y/N told her about the bet before and leaned on her ear, muttering something about the piercing. Jackie looks at her with that innocent doe eyes, shrugging.

Y/N has a few strands of hair braided, thanks to Taissa. Shauna's glued on Y/N's profile while the other three started a conversation, she decided to listen to them. This time, Y/N had her cheeks burned from the other day, thanks to Jackie it kept at bay. Her grin warming her chest with every reply Y/N made, always with illusion or loving explaining something at them that they don't know. It doesn't matter how dumb the question is, Y/N never would reply with a bad word.

"Nat and Van went to that pub." Taissa informed them once she finished braid Y/N's hair.

"I want to go to Marco's library." Y/N says, standing up and walking towards the place without receiving a reply from them.

Shauna muttered at them that she goes with Y/N, wanting some new books too. Jackie nodded more relaxed this time. It's funny, the only one challenging Y/N to wake up and she is the first worried about her going alone. The ginger steps quickly to Y/N side, throwing the napkin in the trash.

They walked in, Y/N walking mindlessly through the shelves of books until she reached her destination, romantic novels. Shauna bit the inside of her cheek and wandered to the horror one, the smell of lavender mixed with cinnamon relaxing her.

When Shauna grabbed a book to read the inside cover, to the other side was Y/N with a few books on her hands, a brief frown on her eyebrows. She didn't know why that simple sight made Shauna's heartbeat accelerate. It's the contrast of the white dress with her sun kissed skin, eyes' colour accentuating, plump lips, long eyelashes, or her cute braids on her salt hair? She can't put a finger on it, but feeling attracted to Y/N, it definitely wasn't on her plans for that summer.

"Do you see something interesting?" Lottie startled her, giving a little jump on her spot.

"You scared me." Shauna muttered, glaring at her.

Lottie apologizes, a smirk on her lips. The tall brunette wandered between the shelves, a few books in a hand. Shauna grabbed the book she wanted to read from the past month and followed Lottie, who now is with Y/N.

"I don't know, Lot. I want this, but maybe I could buy it next time." Y/N said, letting saying book again on their place.

She walked to the cash register, Shauna bit her lip and quit off from Lottie's hands the book Y/N left behind a few moments.

"Are you sure?" Lottie asked behind her. However Shauna ignored her and positioned herself behind Y/N to pay.

Once their visit to Lake Key was over, they decided to make dinner and stay there to party, gathering in the living room in a circle. Natalie prepared them their drinks, slowly sipping on it while they chatted.

Until Jackie cleared her throat. "Guys! I want to play a game. What about a simple one, truth or dare?" She proposed, giving a big sip from her ron with coke.

After bickering for a while, they agreed.

"Okay. You go first." Natalie points with her finger at Jackie.

The blonde shrugs, agreeing with it. She chose dare, and Natalie made her swim naked in the pool. Jackie accepted and quit off her clothes while walking outside, their friends laughing with her.

"Alright! I did it, it's my turn to choose." Jackie says with a towel around her body and sitting on the floor. A smirk on her face. "I chose Y/N."

And it made sense for all of them, -less Y/N- why Jackie wanted to play it.

"It's simple. Go to my bedroom and on top of my bed you find what you need to do." Jackie indicated when Y/N chose dare.

Shauna gave her a questioning look, but Jackie ignored her with the same smirk plastered the whole time. They waited a few minutes there waiting for Y/N to come back, chatting animatedly.

Y/N came back, however she changed her clothes. Now she is wearing a red bikini, but a short cover of the full piece. Her demeanor turned shy, chewing her lip nervously.

"Show us!" Jackie exclaimed, clapping with her hands excited.

The silence made in the room once Y/N took off her shorts, turning on heels to them to appreciate the small piece of clothes. Shauna opened her mouth, her pupils dilating from the sight in front of her. She gave a big sip from her drink when felt her mouth dry, the first to speak was Jackie.

"Nice ass, girl!" She cheered her.

Natalie licked her lips, still processing how hot her friend looks. She looked around her, their faces one by one and less Jackie, all of them seemed affected by it.

"That's a dare?" Natalie muttered, trying to play cool.

Jackie glares at her, crossing her arms. "Yes. For Y/N is a good dare, shut up."

"I agree." Van lowly said, their blue eyes dilated and their freckles hiding by a shadow of pink on their cheeks.

"Wait... Is that a piercing?" Taissa frowned, noticing it when her eyes landed on Y/N's chest.

Shauna moves a little uncomfortable, their reactions were immediate, well from the three ones who don't know. Inevitably her eyes fell on Y/N's ass, the heat sprayed inside her body. She made a messy bun, hearing their friends reactions.

"Van knew it." Taissa spoke again, noticing the lack of participation on this.

The redhead guilty shrugged. "I did. She told me the other day."

Y/N put on her shorts again and sat down where she was before, between Lottie and Laura Lee.

The game ended quickly, moving to dance on the improvised dance floor in the living room or the back garden. Usually Shauna hates something related to parties, but these moments, where are her and her friends, she treasures them. Lottie and Laura Lee were talking on the couch, next to a Natalie affected by Y/N revelation, who was happily dancing with her. Shauna drinks in a bar stool while Jackie is making some snacks for them. Van and Taissa chat quietly in a corner with silly smiles on their faces.

Two hours later, Shauna flies behind a giggling Y/N to their shared room. They are the first ones to call it a night, Shauna feels a little relaxed but with her senses intact, while Y/N looks more intoxicated than her.

Once in their respective bed, Shauna hears how her friend can't stop moving. "What's the problem?" She rasped out, her eyes looking in her direction in vain, the darkness didn't let her see properly.

"It sting a little..." Y/N slurred out.

Shauna frowned, but soon understood what she meant. "Then, quit it off." She suggested.

A few seconds later she heard something dropping on the floor followed by a relief sigh. Shauna turned her head, and even if she couldn't see her, she could appreciate her silhouette and it made her jaw clench. Why? Why can't she see her properly why is it turning her on? Maybe it is because she knew about the piercing and it excited her? Shauna groans, now her turn to move on her bed, finding the room very hot right now.

She didn't know when she left herself asleep, but when Shauna opened her eyes, the sun hit directly on her face, the dizziness on her head didn't help at all. She grunts, with her eyes half opened and walks towards the bathroom, noticing the empty bed on her way there.

Shauna takes a short shower, even if she probably would throw herself in the pool, however she didn't want to smell sweaty. She put on her black bikini and put on an old grey sporty shorts and went downstairs, no one was there.

She checked the back garden and there was Y/N, having some breakfast. The girl noticed her and waved, calling with her hand to go there.

"I made breakfast for all, but I'm guessing they would wake up after lunch. That is soon..." Y/N poured coffee in a cup and offered it at Shauna.

"Thanks..." She kindly says, taking it and sitting next to her. She notices the book she bought for her last day, remembering with a smile how Y/N kissed her face and muttering how much she loves her. "You like it?"

"I love it! Amanda is so brave. I wish I could be like her." Y/N commented, biting her toast and continued to read.

"You are brave." Shauna lowly said, sipping from the cup and looking at her.

Y/N gifted her with a warm smile, putting a hand on her forearm. "You are nice. But I'm not. You are brave or Van. But not me."

Shauna frowned, not liking how Y/N talked about herself. "I wish I could see people like you. Or believe everyone is good." She states, grabbing the hand on her forearm between her hands. "You are not afraid of telling them how you feel. I remember when you fought with Jackie in the last year of high school because she mocked Arnold Phillips and you defended him. I was thrilled and she did too." She saw how her cheeks darkened. Shauna appreciates the little messy braids, it even looks better now, she mindlessly puts away a strand of hair, a fond smile when Y/N shrinks because it feels ticklish when her fingertips brushed her neck.

Shauna can't stop looking at her, her hand placing now on her back and caressing it carefully. She leaned on the table, getting closer to her. Y/N brought a hand to her cheek and brushed her thumb there, actually she wiped something there.

"Better." Y/N murmurs, her eyes meeting her brown ones. Shauna swallowed and slowly leaned on her, stopping when their noses brushed with each other. It surprises her when Y/N grabs her face between her hands and kisses her.

It's short but gentle. Shauna chases her a second later, not containing herself and introducing her tongue on Y/N's mouth, exploring and dominating. Her hands were placed on her hips in a firm grip, leaning her head aside to kiss her better. Their lungs burned, making them separate to catch air.

Shauna trailed kisses on her jaw, sneaking a hand under the yellowjackets' shirt she is wearing, caressing her skin. She stopped when Y/N let out a moan, her gaze finding her face.

"Stop looking at me like that... Your stare is deep." Y/N murmurs, looking somewhere else, avoiding her gaze.

The ginger bit her lip, kissing her cheek and separating from her. Bringing her hand out of her shirt and deciding to finish her breakfast.

"You are beautiful, it's not my fault." Shauna replied confidently.

"Shauna!" Y/N whined, making her laugh.

A grunt from behind made them look that direction, seeing a zombie Natalie stepping slowly towards them. She greeted them quietly, pouring an orange juice in a cup and grabbing a croissant.

"You look horrible." Y/N commented, Shauna held her laugh when Natalie glared at her.

"Sorry, miss perfect. Next time I guard you, then I can avoid being the next day like this." She ironically said, signaling herself.

Shauna closed her eyes, the sun kissing her exposed skin and luring her. Natalie commented on them what happened after they left, laughing when Jackie fell or Van hit their face with the glass window.

"Sunscreen." Someone said, something fell on Shauna's lap. The ginger opened her eyes and looked at it and the person who threw it, Charlotte Matthews. "You are matching your hair by now."

Y/N snorted, hiding her mouth with a hand. Lottie wink at her, grabbing some fruit. Shauna poked her finger on her neck and saw how she shrank, giggling and putting away her hand.

They all agreed to spend the day at the beach, to Y/N and Nat's idea. They swim, sunbathing while they relax and play volleyball. Shauna's mind was a spiral, thinking about the kiss she shared with her friend, a friend she thought never saw like something else. The best part? Shauna wants to kiss her again, and wrap her arms around her waist to be nearer her, maybe her hands sneaking to her ass and squeezing it, her lips trailing wet kisses on her neck while Y/N let out moans, like before, then-... Who's that guy? And why is he smirking at her in a flirty manner?

Shauna clenched her fist and stood up, stepping fast towards them and pushing that guy away from Y/N.

"Stay away from her." Shauna scowled with a fierce gaze, putting herself in front of Y/N.

"Shauna! He is a nice boy, stop." Y/N threw the volleyball's ball and helped the blonde guy up.

It infuriated Shauna. "He wants to get on your pants, Y/N!" She gritted, her brown eyes throwing daggers at the innocent blonde boy.

Of course when they went to the beach and Y/N decided to wear what Jackie gifted her last night, some stupid guy should approach.

Fuck Jackie and fuck that guy.

Shauna saw how Y/N removed her gaze from her, her cheeks turning a soft shadow of pink. She felt bad to speak to her like that, usually she would use other words.

"I'm talking with her. That's all, relax." He said in a gentle tone, raising both hands in the air. However Shauna knew better, years being Jackie's best friend teach her experience with the opposite gender. And that guy, wants something else than talking with Y/N.

Shauna gave a sarcastic smile, but before she could give a sardonic comment, Natalie showed up, Lottie behind her with Jackie.

"What happened?" Natalie asks looking at her friends, then her blue eyes notice the blonde guy, making her frown. "Who are you?"

Jackie puts herself next to Shauna, crossing her arms on her chest, while Lottie grabs Y/N's hand, bringing her with hers.

"I'm Neil, nice to meet you." He said, waving with a nervous smile. Shauna snorted mentally, he didn't look like that before.

"Hi, Neil." Natalie said in a fake nice voice, walking towards the tall guy, with every step letting a mark of humid footprint on the sand. "Stay away from her." She patted his shoulder with a low laugh, signaling towards Y/N. "I know the guys like you. Out."

Neil bit his lip, his eyes falling on Y/N. Then, he gave a quiet laugh, his demeanor changing completely. "You all can't be protecting her forever." He muttered, a smug smirk playing on his lips before he turned on his heels and walked out.

Jackie held Natalie's wrist, the same with Shauna. "Stop! That stupid is gone." She murmurs, pushing them both to where they are.

Shauna's eyes fell on Y/N, who is with Lottie. She left behind the bickering that Jackie and Natalie started and grabbed her wrist kindly, stopping their friends.

"Can I talk to you?" Shauna timid asks. Y/N nods slowly, Lottie let them some privacy walking back to her place on the towel. The ginger took her to the seashore, this time her hand intertwined with Y/N's one, playing with her fingers. "I'm sorry to say that." She started, looking at her surroundings. "I don't like the way he was looking at you and... I should let you choose if you want to talk with him or not." She finishes, knowing very well that she will interfere if some dude tries something with her.

Y/N caressed the palm of her hand with her thumb. "Are you jealous?" She hummed, stepping closer.

Shauna frowned, her gaze now on her smug eyes. "No. I'm not. I only... I want the best for you. That's all." She said, shrugging her shoulders.

Why does Y/N think she is jealous? I mean, Natalie acted like her too, is she jealous too? Shauna let out a scoff for this thought.

"I'm jealous." Y/N admitted in a calm tone.

This confession made her feel more confused. "Why?" She can't hide her stupor.

"I saw a few boys looking at you. Your ass. They eat you with his eyes. I don't like it." Y/N explained, her turn to shrug her shoulders.

Shauna relaxed. She didn't notice their eyes on her, thankfully. But she notices the only one on Y/N, and maybe, just maybe, Shauna felt the same.

"You don't need to worry. I'm not interested in them." Shauna whispers, letting her hand out but embracing her waist with an arm and hiding her head on her neck. She feels how Y/N relaxed on her arms and wrapped hers on her neck, playing with her hair.

"I want to kiss you..." Y/N shyly said, a lipped smile on her face when Shauna fixed her chocolate eyes on her.

"I can make an excuse and go home and kiss." Shauna offered, hearing how Y/N let out a melodic laugh, inevitably painting an involuntary smile on her face.

•••

It's been three days since Shauna and Y/N kissed for the first time. Three days that they can't stop kissing. They shared this affection where they are alone in their room, away from their friends or when they are around them, when they aren't looking Y/N stole a kiss from her lips, letting Shauna speechless.

A sigh hit Shauna's face when she separated from her bruised and red lips. Her fingers caressed her cheek and removed a strand of hair from her face, giggling softly while memorizing her features for later fantasizing with her or rant on her journal about how Y/N makes her feel.

They are laying on Shauna's bed, the rays of the full moon hitting Y/N's face, it's time like this Shauna doesn't hate that window. Y/N's hand is playing with her ginger hair, pulling at it every time Shauna bit her lip or sucked her tongue.

"Are you fine there?" Shauna hummed with a hoarse voice, brushing her nose with hers. She can avoid hiding her smugness.

They don't trespass to the other step. It's not like Shauna didn't think about it, it's mainly for Y/N, she didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable, so she happily accepts it.

"Here is hot..." She whispered, with a hand fan herself.

"The window is open." Shauna commented, looking briefly at the window.

"Shauna." Y/N calls her in a soft voice, the mentioned turned to look at her. "Do you feel attracted to me?" Shauna could appreciate how shy Y/N asked this.

"Y/N, I can't stop thinking about you. It's weird to say it loudly, but you are in my mind a lot." Shauna admitted, the burn on cheeks got a bay thanks to Jackie or Lottie to put sunscreen on. But she can feel the warmth on her cheeks just like if that same afternoon she burned all over again.

"You are in my mind too, Shippy. It's funny to think now how intimidated I felt about you in high school." Shauna frowned. Y/N saw her and immediately clarified. "You are hard to let people in, always attached to Jackie and I told you about it before, your gaze is so deep that I feared you could know what I'm thinking."

"That's why you nodded or gave me a short answer?" Shauna asks quietly, now understanding a few things. Y/N hummed an affirmative. "You are right, I don't let people know me easily. But I never would treat you or let anyone talk to you badly. I... We fought with some asshole to defend you. Don't ask and think about them, they are stupid." Shauna says quickly after her confession. "Why do you ask about me that...?" She tried to change the subject, also mostly for curiosity.

"I want to have sex with you." Shauna sometimes forgets how direct she is. Her blush deepens, gladly the dark hides her cheeks.

But it surprises her how natural she said it, and it made her think about it. "Have you had sex before?" She asks, it's the first time she actually thinks Y/N had sex before, she wondered about it but soon dismissed it.

Y/N nods, moving her head to a side. "Why you ask?" Shauna stares at her shocked, her mouth half open and holding her breath. Y/N roll her eyes, it didn't surprise her Shauna having that reaction, it's the same Van had when she told them. "I know that you all think I'm innocent, something I will not discuss... But I'm curious too."

"Sorry..." She apologised, breathing normally again. She blinked a few times, questions popping on her head. "Who? I mean, I know him?" She asks in a low voice.

"No, he is a college friend."

Shauna nods, laying fully by her side. She huffed, rubbing her eyes. "I need to ask it." She said, putting her hands down and fixing her eyes on her, seeing her curious eyes on her. "Did you do it because you wanted?"

"Yeah... I never would do something I don't want." This answer calmed Shauna, thankful Y/N didn't feel social pressure and did it for that.

"Can we go to sleep?" Shauna murmurs, feeling tired. Y/N hummed with a small smile, she kissed Shauna's cheek and proceeded to stand up, but the ginger stopped her, wrapping an arm now on her waist. "Stay here."

They fell asleep with Shauna hugging Y/N, many thoughts in her mind, dissipate when the other started to play with her hair, something Y/N likes and she didn't complain.

The next morning when they woke up and got downstairs, too quiet and finding a note in the fridge.

"We are at the beach, see you there. Jackie xx." Y/N read out loud. "And why didn't they wake up us? I would do it. You know what? I don't feel like going to the beach, if you want to go, have fun." She said in an adorable piss voice, in Shauna's opinion. She walked around and started to make breakfast.

"I like your idea. What do you want to do?" Shauna hummed, going to hug her from behind and kissing her shoulder.

Y/N looks up, thinking. "I want to go eat ice cream in Lake Key. Tomorrow we will get stuck here doing our suitcases and cleaning the house."

On Friday, they all would go to Wiskayok and finish the summer there before coming back to their respective colleges.

Shauna removed her hair aside, peppering kisses on her neck. "I like that." She just wants to spend some time alone with her before they come back.

So that's what they did. After finishing breakfast they changed their clothes and adventure to the small town. It's weird how freely they felt with every shared kiss without worry if someone saw them and judged. It helps that the only way is a solitary dirt road, nobody lives for that area, only the Matthews' family.

They let out their intertwined hands once they entered the town, exploring some places that they never went to before or just walking while laughing for anything. They agreed to eat the ice cream after lunch, for Shauna's luck because she made a little picnic, surprising Y/N.

It's the soft laugh that Y/N let out when Shauna awakened from her mind, too entrance on studying every feature, line and simple detail on Y/N's face that she zoned out. Shauna left the throwable plate on the grass, clearing her throat.

"Have a date with me." Shauna blurted out, mostly because she was rephrasing it in her mind and it slipped out. She blushes the moment she realizes how she asked this. Exchange Y/N raised her head and slowly formed a smile. "What I want to say is that... I thought about us, and I want to go on a proper date with you, if you want of course."

Y/N put her hand on top of hers. "I love to."

"Really?" Shauna asked, a little speechless. Y/N giggles by her reaction, nodding with her head. "You don't would regret it, I promise." She reassured her, carefully intertwining their fingers.

After they finished, Shauna stubbornly paid for their ice cream. They eat it while they walk towards the house, holding hands the moment they step out of the town. Laughs filled the way, ice cream kisses and rosy cheeks.

Shauna let her hand once they approached the fence, opening the doors and letting Y/N pass first. They come back and the house is still empty.

"I want to lay on the sofa, my feet hurt." Y/N commented, letting her bag on the coat stand and laying down in the black couch.

"Come here, I'll take you upstairs." Shauna offered, opening her arms for her to jump.

Y/N let out a delighted sound and jumped on her arms, wrapping her legs on her waist and both arms around her shoulders, leaning her head there too. Shauna held her and walked towards their bedroom, laying Y/N on her bed carefully and getting on top of her when Y/N grabbed her t-shirt and pulled Shauna towards hers.

With only a look, Shauna knew what Y/N wanted. She wants it too, if she is being honest, but what happens if their friends come and surprise them by doing it?

"Are you sure?" Shauna asks in a gentle whisper, her hair coming to her eyes and private to her to keep gazing Y/N, until this one removes with her fingers the strand of hair out. Her hands are too busy supporting her weight on the mattress.

"Very sure." Y/N whispered back, closing the distance and smashing her lips on hers.

Shauna let out a low moan, reciprocating it and soon turning in a hungry kiss. A hand sneaks under her baby blue shirt, slowly tracing her abdomen until reach her chest, squeezing with the bra on, feeling the piercing there. She grunted on the kiss when she felt it, breaking the kiss and taking off her shirt, delighted by the views.

Y/N pulls Shauna's shirt, making the ginger to raise her arms up, letting Y/N take it out. Her brown eyes admired how Y/N held her breath when her gaze met her abdomen, a smirk creeping on her face. A finger traced her stomach, gently scratching her abs.

"I think we have some weaknesses..." Shauna rasped out, chuckling.

"You kept playing soccer?"

Shauna nods. "Yeah. Casually my first friends played soccer and they created a team, like a hobby. I don't mind play there sometime." She explains.

Y/N's fingers get lost on her hair, pressing her head towards hers and starting another kiss. They slowly took out their clothes, Shauna's mouth went immediately on Y/N's chest, no resistance anymore and took her left nipple on her mouth, biting there and tasting the metal too, gaining a whimper by Y/N and her nails digging on her shoulders.

Shauna spent a long time there, when she got satisfied, admiring the new red marks and saliva covered on Y/N's chest, with her red lips peppered wet kisses until reach her mouth, giving her a languid kiss.

After they need to breathe again, Shauna takes advantage when Y/N still has her eyes closed and slowly sneaks her right hand between her thighs, soon meeting how wet Y/N is between her fingers. The ginger let out a groan, her dilated brown eyes catching sight of -now half open- Y/N's eyes and reddened cheeks. While they keep gazing at each other, her hand meets Y/N's entrance and without warning introducing a finger, grunting when she notices how tight she is.

Her nails digged on her shoulders once again, making Shauna let out a hiss of pain. A soft sound escaped from Y/N's mouth, once she felt comfortable with her finger inside of her, Shauna started to move it slowly while her thumb rubbed circles, creating more sounds slipping from her mouth, making Shauna drunk hearing them.

Another finger was introduced, her movements becoming faster and the first moans echoing in the room. Shauna involuntarily starts to move her hips in search of some friction, the wetness on her center increasing. The sweat on their bodies is more present, their hair stinging on their faces, framing their faces in a sexy form. With three fingers inside Y/N, her orgasm is near.

Shauna gave her a wet kiss, unable to control. Y/N came on her fingers, muffling her orgasm in her mouth. Their chest moved in sync, their lungs asking for air. The ginger took her hand out of her, the free one on top of Y/N's knee while slowly, her right one approaches her vision, the smell hitting her nose. After a few seconds where her eyes stuck looking at her hand, she took it to her mouth, a porn sound slipped from her mouth the moment her fingers met her tongue, testing Y/N. Her eyes rolled behind her head, her tongue wrapping her fingers and sucking slowly, testing every fluid.

When she opened them again, was met by hypnotised eyes gazing at her, biting her lip. Shauna let out a small smirk, putting down her now clean hand. Before she could make a comment, Y/N changed their positions, now Shauna is laying her back on the mattress and Y/N is straddling her. Shauna put both hands on her knees, caressing them, gazing at Y/N from a new angle. Her eyes fell from her marked chest to her half hidden shaved pussy, meeting her stomach side.

"Promise me something." Y/N said in a scratchy voice, calling her attention.

Shauna nods, captivated by her beauty. "Anything."

Y/N gave her a small grin, leaning her head to the same level as her, lowering it a few centimeters. "Don't dye your hair. I love how this colour looks on you... It matches your eyes, making them have a deeper look, if that is possible..." She ranted, admiring her ginger hair sprayed out on the pillow in soft waves. "You look good too with your natural colour hair, but this one... I really like it." She finishes in a low voice.

"I promise you that I will have it for a long time from now on." Shauna said with a cheeky smile, knowing very well that she would be stuck with that hair colour only for her. Then, she put a hand on her back neck and pushed her face towards hers, sealing the promise with a passionate kiss.

When Y/N moved her hips involuntarily, Shauna felt a patch of wetness on her abdomen, and groaning by this, she took both hands on her waist in a firm grip, probably letting some bruises there, and slowly pushed her a little, making friction on her sensitive spot.

"Can I...?" Y/N whispered, timid.

Shauna removed her hair from her face and nodded, after all she incite to do it. "You can ride my abs." She said in a deep voice, hearing the strong breathing falling from her lover's lips.

And she did it, up and down, at first with slow movements. It will become faster soon, Shauna is delighted by the sight in front of her. She clenched her abs when noticed Y/N was coming, with her head back and both hands on Shauna's sides. Y/N gave a final thrust, screaming for pleasure and falling on top of her, exhausted.

Shauna caressed her back tenderly, feeling a warm liquid fell on her stomach. She swallowed hard, she felt a little frustrated sexually talking. Shauna thought that watching Y/N had her pleasure, she didn't need it now, but... She is wrong. She let Y/N recover her breath, playing with her hair without the necessity to use words.

Y/N hummed contents, peppering kisses on her naked shoulder until her neck, biting gently there, gaining a low moan from Shauna. Her nails scratched Y/N's thigh, a loud hiss slipped from their mouths. Shauna observed when Y/N slowly started to go down, she paid attention to her chest, but not staying too much time there, preferring to bite her stomach a few times.

"I'm not shave..." Shauna said panting, a little embarrassed. Y/N raised her head frowning, seeing how Shauna closed her eyes, her cheeks turning more red.

"I don't care, Shippy." Y/N snorted innocent. It made Shauna open her eyes, seeing a brief frown on Y/N's eyebrows. "And I think if you shave now, you would cut yourself." She said looking down, the face she put on made Shauna relax and chuckle.

Y/N bit her lip and looked at Shauna, asking with her eyes. The ginger nods, her breathing stuck on her throat, but not keeping her eyes away from her. Y/N give her some wet mouthed kisses on her thigh, getting closer. Shauna opened her legs more to let Y/N put herself between knees, and her mouth immediately met her center, giving a long lick. Shauna let out a moan, biting her lip and scratching the pillow next to her. She can feel Y/N's nails on her thighs, her tongue getting deep inside her and recollecting the wetness she had from seeing Y/N cum two times.

A hand squeezed her chest, hard. If the moment doesn't require her to think, she would ask how in hell Y/N is doing it so well. Shauna is close, she is worked up and her orgasm is approaching, with hand on Y/N's head, pressing her face on the exact part where she wants and with the room filling her moans, Shauna released on her mouth with a guttural moan, her legs shaking.

With half open eyes and an irregular breathing, Shauna saw Y/N's chin covered by her cum, her hair mess and sweat covering her body. She raised half of her body and grabbed her face between her hands, kissing hard.

"SHAUNA, Y/N! ARE YOU TWO HERE?" Jackie interrupted them. They shared a panicked look and soon they started to put on their clothes. For their luck Jackie was downstairs, at least they could be dissimulate, only if the blonde didn't get upstairs and entered there, then they screwed up.

"Go to the bathroom!" Shauna said in a low voice, putting on her big shirt. "I'm going to distract her. Get down for around 5 minutes." She explains, putting her hair in a messy bun.

Y/N nods, disappearing on say place.

Shauna stepped down and saw her friends there, embarrassed she waved them with a hand. "Hey, Y/N is in the bathroom." She cleared her throat, avoiding Jackie's hazel eyes and going to the kitchen for water, because she really needed it.

Jackie hummed, following her. "We were worried. I thought you two would come."

"Y/N didn't like you don't wake us up and we went to the town." She explains, shrugging and giving her an apologetic lipped smile.

"I told you..." Van walked next to Jackie and sang, letting some things on top of the countertop.

"Y/N! ARE YOU MAD AT ME?" Another person would wait to ask this face to face, but it's Jackie and she went to the top of the staircase, looking up to an empty hall.

"NOT ANYMORE!" Another scream was heard, Shauna shaking her head with a smirk while sip from the cup.

"DO YOU WANT TO COME TO THE MOVIES WITH ME AND I COMPENSATE YOU?" Jackie asked hopefully, even if her told her that she wasn't mad at her.

Y/N approaches her vision, she took a shower and now has a lilac top belonging to Shauna with a black shorts, a small smile resting on her lips. "Okay. I missed our dates." She can't resist and hugs Jackie.

"She is so weak. We need to make her stronger." Van commented with a frown, looking at them.

Shauna snorted. "Which one?"

•••

Summer passed faster, and Shauna knew it.

With dreamy eyes and a silly smile, she recounted every date she had with Y/N these past two months, her favourite one was when she asked Y/N to be her girlfriend and she said no because Y/N wanted to ask her to be her girlfriend. After discussing it for a few minutes, Shauna gave up the moment Y/N gave her puppy eyes.

She sneaked every night to Y/N's house, going to sleep together and fearing she couldn't do it the moment they couldn't hold each other when they came back to their respective colleges. Many hidden kisses, desire to do what they did that week in her friend's house, but they gave up every time they tried, and something or someone interrupted them, so they happily did other things.

Like talk. They can talk for hours. It's something that Shauna adored about their night laying on the bed, talking about anything in particular or knowing Y/N unknown's side. She comprehends her better, and mentally grateful for choosing her to share her secrets, her dream passion or just to not run away from her with her weird persona.

About their friends, well... They agreed to not tell them anything. Y/N commented at Shauna about telling them their relationship at the end of the summer, only if she wants too. Shauna nodded, unsure. She wishes that she was more like Y/N in that aspect, not fearing what people could say, and less with her friends, the ginger knew that they can't say anything bad. But they are in 1997, and until this date, Shauna saw hate about it.

"What are you thinking about?" Y/N interrupted her thoughts, balancing their hands while they walked to Shauna's car. They went to the woods to walk, enjoying some time alone. The night arrived and the hour to the meeting with their friends was approaching. Because they would tell them about their relationship.

"About... How beautiful you are." Shauna commented, holding her laugh when Y/N shoved her playful.

The nights in Wiskayok by this time of the year usually are breezy, and Shauna wears one of her famous flannel on, Y/N was wearing one of hers too because she was stubborn to not grab any jackets and luckily Shauna had one in her car.

The car approached their vision, Shauna wrapped an arm around Y/N's shoulders and gently opened the copilot door, gaining a kiss on her cheek the moment she sat down on her seat.

"We need to pick up Jackie." Y/N commented, searching for some songs she likes on the radio.

"Believe me, I know." Shauna rolled her eyes, used to her friend's princess side.

The ride to Jackie's home was filled with Y/N humming the song playing on the radio, Shauna tapped the wheel to the beat of the song, humming quietly too. She honked a few times when they arrived, praying that Jackie doesn't take too long.

Shauna put a hand on Y/N's knee, caressing the exposed skin with her thumb. Her brown eyes softened seeing her profile, her mind calming down the spiral that usually she is in.

"You sure about this?" The ginger, less now, but still glowing, asked. Y/N put a hand on hers and nod with a smile.

"Yeah. I want to kiss you in front of my friends. Our friends." Y/N whispered, playing with her fingers.

Shauna can't hold the smile anymore. "And I want to kiss you every hour... Is this sane?" She joked, leaning to kiss her cheek.

Y/N shakes her head, giggling.

Shauna removed her hand when she heard a door opening. She looked behind and saw Jackie Taylor get in, shivering a little and she had a jacket on.

"Put on the calefaction, Shauna." Jackie said, closing the door.

"Hello to you too, and not. I'm not going to put it. It's not that cold." Shauna said, starting the car. She heard how Jackie let out a gasp.

"Open the right seat, there is a blanket." Y/N commented before they could get entangled by another silly discussion.

Jackie says loudly how much she loves her, making Y/N laugh and Shauna rolled her eyes. They are approaching Lottie's house, the last reunion until Thanksgiving. They decided to spend their time together in a quiet place, and since Lottie's parents are out the major part of the time, she offered to hold the little party.

"The last ones!" Van opened the front door, putting them to a side to let them pass in. Y/N is the first one to hug the redhead, from the whole gang, Van and Y/N had a special bond.

Y/N let Shauna, Jackie and Van behind and she adventure into the big living room, usually quiet and empty, now filled with laughter and life.

"There you are!" Lottie saw her and stood up with a happy smile, engulfing Y/N in a hug. "I'm gonna miss you a lot." She whispered when they separated.

"I hope you miss us a lot too..." Natalie commented behind her, a teasing smirk on her plump lips. Then, she envelopes Y/N in a hug.

Lottie rolled her eyes. "Don't get jealous, Scatorccio. I will miss you too, less than the rest but still I'm going to miss you." Her dark eyes lit with mischief, taking her red cup to her mouth.

Before Nat could reply back, Taissa interrupted them by pushing the blue eyed girl to a side and taking her turn to hug Y/N. Shauna and Jackie approached there and greeted them with hugs too.

They sit down next to each other, recounting old anecdotes or telling the new ones. Shauna was quiet, hearing them and sipping from her red cup while her eyes travelled to the storyteller. Y/N nudges her side, giving her a silly face when she turns to look at her.

"You are an idiot." Shauna leaned on her ear and whispered with a loving smile.

Y/N makes an offended face, putting a hand on her chest. Shauna rolls her eyes, but her smile remains.

"I will remind you later when you want to kiss me..." She whispered in her ear, licking her lips when she separated.

Her brown eyes opened, big and deep. Without noticing she gave her puppy eyes, not liking the idea of not kissing her. Y/N couldn't resist her eyes and without thinking too much, she grabbed her chin and pecked her lips.

Shauna froze on her seat, the place getting quiet and feeling all eyes on them. She cleared her throat, her surprise eyes going to normal but refusing to look at them. Y/N frowned when she paid attention to them, at first confused but soon realising what she did.

"Oh my god! Shit, I'm sorry Shippy." Y/N apologised with her girlfriend.

"Shippy? She hates that. This is serious." Van was the first to comment.

Shauna looks at her redhead friend, frowning. "She is the only one who can call like that." She warned them.

Y/N saw their unreadable expressions and decided to clarify. "We are in a relationship." She told them.

"Are you corrupting her!?" Jackie exclaimed, a shock expression plastered on her face.

"She's not! And you started corrupting me." Y/N said. "We like each other and decided to date. We wanted to tell you tonight, in a different manner... I hope it's okay with you guys." She said softly, playing with her fingers.

"Me and Taissa are in a relationship." Van said casually, Taissa nodded next to them.

"We are too..." Lottie comments, giving a soft look to the blonde.

Shauna opened her mouth, surprised and Y/N painted a small smile. "So, all of us like women? We are cool then." Jackie says, all looks on her now. "What? I appreciate women too." She said shrugging, taking her red cup to her lips.

"We knew that. We thought in high school that you and Shauna were dating. When we found that you didn't then we assumed during college maybe you get together." Natalie explained in an obvious tone.

"I agree." Y/N says, receiving an incredulous look from her girlfriend. "You look cute together if that helps."

"She corrupted me." Shauna said, looking at all of them. Y/N calls her name in a whine, while their friends laugh.

The rest of the night they enjoyed their time together, explaining the new unknown sides and all of them gave a talk to Shauna.

[fluffywolverine]

why i believe sauron does not exactly "love" galadriel

let's discuss saurondriel, shall we?

i have to start with exposing myself - i don't exactly ship it, because up until the finale i believed that sauron's motivation was never affection, but only manipulating galadriel into siding with him. i never believed in sincerity of "if i could just hold on to that feeling" nor "not dark, not with you at my side", i only saw that in context of sauron saying what galadriel wanted to hear.

but.

then in s2e8 sauron said "not all of it" [meaning his acts being only an illusion] and… well, i still don't think it's love per se, but i believe he perceives this simply as deep connection. let me explain.

we have to start with a very important statement: sauron is NOT an elf, orc, human, dwarf or any other race more or less related to us. he's a maia, a primordial being, sort of either an angel or a lesser god. he's been alive longer than any middle-earth race, and he will never be quite like any of them. furthermore, while the valar have spouses - meaning we might assume they can form romantic relationships - the maiar are always mentioned alone, none of them being ever married (or at least most of them - please correct me if i'm wrong). my conclusion is that the maiar, including sauron, aren't exactly inclined to romance.

enter sauron meeting galadriel.

i believe the thing that drew him to her was their main similarity: being cast out by their own people for going too far in their actions while believing they do good. they both had to suffer loses for their purpose, they also both desired to fix what was broken - galadriel by sauron himself, sauron making amends after serving morgoth.

i feel like sauron saw himself in galadriel a little bit, he saw the same fire, the same passion, which ultimately led galadriel to the light and sauron to the darkness.

let's also not forget that the thing TROP showcased really well is how opportunistic sauron was. he sees a chance and immediately takes it in order to shift for his own gain. would he create a bond with any other elf or even other powerful being if they had joined the raft? of course. it being galadriel was a coincidence, he would have used anyone else and if there was never anyone, he would've come up with an entirely different plan.

it ends up being galadriel though, so he slowly starts getting closer to her and here we get to the tricky part - does he actually fall in love? on galadriel's part we know that she does, it was confirmed by charlotte brändström, the director, and frankly, i agree with here, on galadriel's part i can definitely see the romance slowly building up. with sauron/halbrand there, i can only see the likeliness of minds, and, what sauron hopes for, but never actually happens, the same path for a common purpose.

i think he shares a similar kind of deep platonic connection with celebrimbor, but with him, it's mostly based on shared love for craft. sauron, originally being an apprentice of aulë (the OG smith if you will) must've had grand love for this craft, and i believe he saw the same passion in celebrimbor. that was the field they bonded over, and it's just as platonic as his feelings for galadriel, only with her, it was more generally oriented, not focused on a single thing like craft.

there is also one aspect i wanted to talk about, meaning galadriel binding sauron to light. i see it in a way that sauron is afraid of turning into morgoth 2.0. he saw what his old master did, how he spiralled down into the madness of power. sauron doesn't want that, not because it was literally evil, but because that's what led to morgoth's fall. sauron saw his mistakes and had to make sure he doesn't follow the same path. now would sauron actually stick to light with galadriel by his side if she joined him? i don't think so, i think he would abuse his power and her, which would eventually end in his fall after all, but i think he must've thought pure of his intents.

of course everyone can interpret saurodriel in any way they want, i just wanted to propose something different in a romance centred world, where the only way for characters to be together is either lovers or (much less common) friends. i think it's valuable to step out of this box, especially with a character who might not know love at all.