#I'm glad with the current episodes but let's be honest.........

[miyakuli]

I'm obsessed with whether or not the whole manga will be adapted, I wonder all the time about how many seasons it will need to do that

We're at episode 3 and it covered the first volume entirely

Ranma has 38 volumes

If we consider that a season should be around 24-26 episodes and if they keep the pace of at least 3 episodes for a volume....

I guess we'll have 4/5 seasons to cover it all

THAT'S DOABLE FOR NETFLIX & MAPPA RIGHT? PLEASE DON'T BREAK MY HOPES ;;

[watchingblsnowandforever]

We Are Ep.11

Part 1

*sits with half a tub of ice cream with both AC and fan on because my AC is old and needs a little help and puts my cat on Do Not Disturb mode (aka scratching his belly)*

Hello!!!!

Welcome back to my crack posting! =D

Warning: long post, and since I have like 60 screenshots, there will be a part two 😊😅

I wrote that intro before I'd watched the ep. Me as I was watching the ep was mostly incoherent screaming (so much so that my cat woke up from his nap to give me "what the hell, hooman" look).

This episode was amazing, and I loved it, and I'll probably die of too much fluff, but that won't happen before I finish watching We Are (which- WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE ARE JUST 5 EPS LEFT?!!).

I was giggling and kicking my feet (just like Peem the morning after that Prince Charming kiss) from the very first scene.

Oh, they are so gone for each other (and I am gone for them 😭). The smiles, the trying to hear what the other is doing just across the door ah

So, so true. As a writer that hits.

Also, I'm very glad they decided to showcase creative blocks, even if it was for a few minutes.

Me to PhumPeem: yes, Peem, I would love to know too.

Also- I really wanna know what Ciize was doing back there 😭

Too cute to handle 😭

Jokes (and puns) aside, this scene is quite significant. Previously, whenever Phum was seen in the vicinity of the Fine Arts building, it was only because he wanted something from Peem (yes even that scene in ep. 8, he wanted company from Peem), but now, he's just sitting there waiting for Peem. And when Peem comes down, he's pinching his cheeks right there and acting cute with him and asking what's wrong.

And he keeps on asking, because he can see that Peem is a little moody, and not his usual self. "You're usually livelier than this."

Phum: "Actually, I want to be water too..."

Me: No way, is this what I think it is?

Phum: "I want to be the reason you feel good."

Me: yeah, yep, that's what I thought

No but, you can't tell me Phum doesn't binge watch BLs with his beloved teddy bear. Of course he has a whole arsenal of cheesy flirting lines.

All this time, it was always Phum telling Peem how comfortable he is around him and his friends, how fun it is.

Welp, it's Peem's turn.

I love Phum.

This is both him asking for consent as well as making sure they're on the same page and going at the same pace (which he always does, as I'd said before).

Also, no, he wants you to get closer.

HANDS.

Hear how polite and soft Q is with Toey now? Once Q knew for sure that he's allowed to show affection towards Toey as more than just a mentor/mentee, he decided to be fluffy as heck and never went back (because his love language is giving and showing through actions).

Love that for them both <3

This is such a valid fear.

He was afraid that his love would be too much, and in the process he'd lose the person he loves again, so he thought it better to just suffer alone than confess. Not gonna lie, my heart broke just a little here. (Also, because I'm currently rewatching MSP, I'll be pulling a lot of parallels, and this reminds me of that scene where Sound tells Gun that he's afraid to confess to Win because he's pretty sure he'll get rejected).

Oh, and I keep forgetting to say this, but Satang is such an amazing actor. Watching Sound and Toey, I almost can't believe they're played by the same person.

Phum's lethal weapon and Peem's fatal weakness 😭

Let's be honest though, no one would be able to resist that smile, those eyes and that soft, "Na, krab". Oh yeah, he used polite pronouns here by the way.

I can't always notice the shift from formal to informal or vice versa because I'm not that well-versed in the language (yet) but this was pretty obvious.

Bonus (Peem's reaction):

Tan: flirts with his theerak non-stop 24/7 Fang: *brushes his hair a little and apologizes for making him wait* Tan: *melts into a blushing mess*

That man is so whipped.

And in this house, we stan all whipped men.

This actually reminds me of when I was a wee baby (around 3 or 4 years old, I think) when I rescued a baby sparrow and took it to my dad and told my neigbours my dad would be able to heal it because he's a dcotor (he isn't a vet either) 😭

Also- naming a bird by another bird is so true to Pun's character.

This so relatable oh gods 😭

Also, we got the princess carry for Pride month! Twice if we count Chain lifting Pun in the waterfall, which I totally do.

We finally get being carried to bed but realizing they're laying on top of the blankets instead of just being magically wrapped in them by morning!

*sighs fondly* such a simp. <3

Uh huh, you said that last time too.

Don't lie, Peem, you'd let him hug you every night.

👀

Is this the reason behind the NC rating?

Also, this singular line just gave me a brain worm that is making me write my first smut fic. I blame y'all for getting me into this series.

Yes, of course, Phum, everyone believed your "snort mi mi mi".

Don't think I didn't see your little secret smile, Peem.

(Also, I have a headcanon that Phum just loves to be the little spoon)

Now who's hugging who, huh?

"Go away", he says, while putting his arm around his (not) boyfriend.

See, it was all fun till this point, but you can't be giving me this level of domestic fluff while at the same time telling me they're not even dating yet. That just doesn't work.

So, for me, from this point on, they're an old married couple <3

Frankly though, all the four couples in this series are old married couples that just don't know they're married yet.

Toey: HELP ME!!!

Q: WHAT HAPPENED WHO NEEDS BEATING UP-

Toey: I forgot to do my assignment and today's the deadline 🥺

Q: ... 😑

You don't...?

I thought that was the perfect time to start working on it?

jk jk, kids, I'm a chronic procrastinator, please don't learn from me, learn from your P'Q

(Q reminds me so much of @desi-yearning when she scolds me after I pull an all-nighter to submit an assignment or study for an exam 😭)

Oh. Oh.

Oh my.

I love this scene so much.

This pencil box is very very special to Q, and he's asking Toey to draw on it - something that is irriversible, as Toey himself says.

But this is Q's way of putting together both his loves. This pencil box was picked up by Toey the first time, but back then, Q only knew him as Milk Frappe Boy.

Now, he's asking Toey to do something Milk Frappe Boy would never have been able to (remember, Toey started taking an interest in art only after meeting Pencil Senior), because Pencil Senior disappeared on Milk Frappe Boy, but Q would never disappear on Toey.

On this note, I end Part 1.

Part 2 will be out tomorrow, because as much as I try to deny it, I have these pesky things called responsibilities to attend to, and it's very late here now (not past my regular bed time, but way past my ideal bed time 😭)

Thank you for reading! 😊

Here, have some pizza and a cookie🍕🍕🍪

[If you want, my previous posts: Ep. 8 Ep.9 Ep.10]

And here's Part 2

[backjustforberena]

Hi! I just wanted to say that I absolutely adore your takes on Rhaenys. Unironically, there are so many times where I am having A Big Thought on the subject and come on here and you have said the exact thing I do not have the words to say myself and it is wonderful.

Also, I just saw your reply to someone else who said something similarly, and I am glad to know that your current fixation on all things Eve and also Rhaenys as a character isn’t going anywhere. I always feel like I’m late to the party discovering things so I wind up missing all the good discourse and squeeing over actresses and characters, so knowing that at least for the foreseeable future you will also be out there in the world losing your shit over her is good for my soul.

Also also, I do not know if you are still taking the rose asks, but the excerpts of yours I have read from that so far are all so good. I am very (im)patiently waiting for whenever you see fit to finish the things they are a part of so I may enjoy them just as much in context as I have in snippet form!

Hello! I let this sit in my inbox for a few days just so I could keep looking at it and smiling broadly. What a lovely, lovely thing to say and to take the time to write.

I'm glad that you've enjoyed my meta, thoughts and opinions about Rhaenys. She's just a character that's got a very big hold on me at the moment (along with her husband and her relationships with others) and no one in my real life actually watches HOTD for me to talk to them about it, and not in this detail! So Tumblr is a great place to really indulge in all that sort of thing, and get genuine debate and engagement from others who may be feeling the same way. And it's a creative outlet, as much as anything else, with the fic and the gifs and all of that. I really love it.

You're not late with me! And the good thing about Tumblr is that the internet is permanent. If you are interested in meta and thoughts and all that stuff, then you can search my blog. A lot of tagged with "bad meta" because I like being ironic, or else with the character name. And, honestly, I'm always happy to re-hash. You could come into my inbox any time.

I've always got something percolating, fic-wise, and, for being so lovely and nice, here's a longer extract of something - it's an AU in which, in Episode 01, Viserys summons Rhaenys over Rhaenyra, and offers the crown to her. A lot of the time, I do "what-ifs" to explore the politics and the interpersonal relationships. This one has been a doozy to actually finish because, as you can read, Rhaenys is basically thinking Viserys is out of his mind - that it can't be done:

I like writing Viserys and Rhaenys - the tragedy of that relationship. I don't do it often enough because, unfortunately, there will always be barriers preventing true honesty between them, which curbs any progress between them and a lot of opportunity for storytelling that's true to them.

There's always pain and distance despite deep love. This delves into that a little bit but because Viserys needs Rhaenys to see his earnestness, and they are in private, and he needs her to accept his plan (giving her the crown), the walls come down a bit. So, for example, in this, after this extract, Viserys actually asks her why she never had more children. And she's actually honest about it.

It's fun to explore. Asking yourself questions.

[hacked-by-jake]

Spoiler~~~~~~ Spoiler~~~~~ Spoiler

So, Can we know how you felt about the "side story" ending 👀👀👀

You can absolutely know that I was soooooo incredibly breathless!!!! That was absolutely a needed ending! And to be honest, I wasn't expecting that. I wasn't expecting they would put it there this clear. I thought the chat with ash was the little part for episode 1 and then they pulled this out and I absolutely freaked out completely.

I was absolutely stunned and I run around like a maniac because I couldn't believe it and I was soooo thrilled and wahhhhhhh.

You can get me with him. It's the truth. I'm a simply person.

Besides, I saw more Everbyte in this part. Not because of him, not because of the style we're used to due to duskwood. Because it was made with so much creativity and so smart.

I mean, giving us the end screen and than his favourite appearance move. It was amazing and I'm grateful they have this back to us. Very glad.

It doesn't make the other things disappear. But I think Everbyte still deserves praise for the good things. Especially since they now have the time do improve some things.

It was great. It was amazing. I was feeling exactly what I've missed before. Not because of Moonvale own story, I like the story as well, but the other things were in the shadows of everything else.

But with this... Damn, it was insane. And it was sooo early and I was sitting outside and I swear my eyes were bigger than Adams. 😂

Completely took my breath away. And come on.. Showing us his stuff??? You can't tell me this wasn't on purpose! They saw us freaking out about the fact that he took pictures for us. Just pictures of the mine. And we freak out.

And now they gave us this?? I won't let anyone tell me it wasn't their intention. But even if it wasn't, I don’t care.

This was a huge end and it made me incredibly happy 😭

And I was also so very glad to see Alan. I still love him as well. xD

So, thank you for this, Everbyte. This idea was great and we need more of this kind of style back!

And here again, if you're interested, my life reaction on Tumblr when I played the part. I think it shows how I felt. 😂

Thank you a lot for asking, dear Anon. There's so much negativity currently, and that's okay, but talking about the happy things is needed and a more than wonderful change. 💚

[hochmvt]

Welcome back to your favorite horror podcast '𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐒'. I'm your host Isaiah, this is episode 152 and I'm so glad you joined me on this beautiful day. I hope you're doing fantastic and ain't suffering from the current heat as much as I do. Recording this in the middle of nowhere – but … what else is new –, today we're following the story of Violet and Hunter, a happily married couple from the midwest. Or … so it seems. After Hunter noticed some changes in his wife's behavior, the couple's true love for one another was tested. What happens if the person you thought you knew in and out starts to act erratic? What if you discover new sides to them you're not only unfamiliar with but also scared by? How well can you know a person, despite being married to them for years? Before we dive into the topic of truly knowing people and the seemingly harmless multifacetedness of "love", as always: thank you for tuning in.

Alright ! Welcome back, welcome back! As I said before, I'm so glad you joined me on this fine day. I saw you guys' posts on Reddit wishing my mom well and I'm glad to say, that your little affirmations worked wonders. She's feeling on top of her game again and was touched by your compassion, so she thinks you aren't just weird internet people anymore – then she thought about signing up for Reddit herself and I kinda talked her out of it. Luckily. That being said, enough of the chit chat and let's get right into it.

I stumbled across Hunter's story approximately two weeks after the first 'incident'. See, I'm not necessarily much into this entire married couple kinda thing (to be honest with you, in the beginning it kinda sounded like they just needed some couple's therapy and I was about to brush it away) but this one eventually felt like something more serious. When I met up with Hunter, this poor fella looked like he hadn't slept for weeks. We were supposed to meet at a Diner closeby to the motel he stayed at. I got there a little late, stood outside, smoking a cigarette and watched the people inside. It was hard to miss him. He sat at the counter, looking like one of those guys at 3AM in any old dive bar, thinking about what to tell their wife when, where and why the 'Only two pints, hun, I promise' - pledge was broken.

To be honest with you, after what he told me, the only medicine that would've worked with Hunter was Jaegermeister – and in that moment I was convinced that I am the funniest person on planet earth – but I didn't make the joke in front of him.  Violet was your typical girl next-door ; rather modest, pedantic, however she was kind and thoughtful. Pulling pranks or dicking around wasn't something in her repertoire – contrary to Hunter. Frankly, both of them seemed kinda contradictory from what Hunter had told me. Two weeks prior, Violet had returned from a trip to her sister's place down in Parks, close to the Kansas' border. What Hunter had noticed upon her return in the middle of the night was her frizzy, tangled hair, her tired eyes and terse behavior, but he didn't think much of it. After all, she just arrived from a four hour drive in the middle of the night, so she headed to take a shower before going to bed. 

Isaiah's phone rang. In the middle of recording. Who on earth dares to call at 3AM in the morning? All of his friends knew where he was, they usually checked the time zones, if they decided to give him a call (which rarely ever happened, none of them was really fond about talking on the phone). Upon sorting his thoughts, he realized what n̸̡̢͍̯̤̥̞̼̦̭͈͇͇͚̭̠̜͈̘͇̤̯͕̉͗̃́̑̓͑̊́̊͐͆̒̿́̈͌̓̽̚̕̕͜à̷͕̤̳̪̩̪̫̳̺͉̗̈̊̍͐̀̀͑̀͗̿͠ͅm̸̡̡̨̨̛̭͓̦̺̼͉̣̯̲̖͔͖̟̙͈̜̞͔̙̗͈̺̳̼̬̞̞̮̙̥̼̝̄͌͂͌̍͌̾̓̓͑́͋̇̀̂̓̂͛͋̓̈́̂͑̑̍͒͒͂́͛̀̈́̂͑͂̂̉̉͘̕̚̕͘͝͝e̴̡͖̼̦̗̝̪̙̰͖̯̟̲̳̠͇̥̿̈̀̈́͑̏̈̏̀̌̏̊̈́ had popped up on the screen; his heart dropped, his hands felt clammy. C̷̨̛̪͎̩̣̫̮̰͈͛̈́͋̾̔̌͛̿̀̄̕͜͝ͅͅa̵̻̳͔̜͓̠̙̤̖͈̲͋̽̊̅̇́͗̒͑̆͒̇̔̅̑͂̒̆̇̏͐̍͘͜͝͝r̵̨̡̨̧̢̡̧̛̗̭̤̗͖̝͕͈̠͚̹͓̫͔͚̫̫͈̱̦̦̱͇͙̖͎̬̘̬̪̫̣̪͉͈̹̮͓̟̅̑̅̓̓̽̄̃͂̎̀̆̐̒̐̍̈́̏͒̐͌̂̾̚̚͜͜͝͝ṱ̷͔̰̮͉̭̳͙̣̫̥͉̻̝̠͈̭̼̦̩̯̰͙̩͎̳̱̺̞̖̺̬̹̃͜ͅę̸̨̻͙̯̦̲͕̟͎̰̬̼̝̪͙̫͉̗̜͔̞̳̻̪͕̳͔̗͎̤͕̖̙̬̮̼̳̗̺͋̏̃̓̍̆̃̇̎͝͝ͅͅr̸̨̹̩̮̤̙̗͎͕̬͛̉͗̓͊͊̅̆̈́͂͌͛̄̓̐̍̋̚̕̚͠. He hasn't called in ages. 

They were teenagers back then, Isaiah had no idea how to approach him, a̶̛̛̟̯̼̩̟̣͎̺͇̼̼̥̳̮͓̐̓̓̑̽͊͗͑̇̂̾͗͐͑͋̀͗̾̋͊̓͊̀̆̾̓͛́̈́̽͒̇͐̂͐̌̇͘͘̕͘͘̕̚͝͠f̸̳̠̩͈̣̗̜̹̘͔̣͖͔͓̟̠̝̖̦͙̖̤̫̖͍͉͖̓̌̐ͅţ̶̡̰̤̗͎̪̘̦̪͈̦̝̮̙̩̤͚͍̥̟̜͍͓͍͇͔̜̝͕͖̳̎͆̿̌͒́̂͊̽̂͒̉͂̐̽̓̋̽̚͜͝͠e̷̡͍͚̞̣͍̯̼͈͕̥͈̭̯̪͈͙͔̤̬͌̈́̀͑̐̃̆͒̃̂͌̈́̀̍̐̈́̈́͂̃̐̍̎̓̂̔̎͒̆̒͌́͗͛̏͛̈́͂̃̀͊̏̊͂̚͝͝͝͝͝r̵̨̧̙̻̳͕͎̻͇͚̦͓͓̭̦̰͎͇͉͚͎̜̓́͐͑͛͗̿̎͊͂̄̆͋͑͊̆̔̽́̃̆̓̂͊̿̂̅̎͂̌̏̒̐̍́͐͌̎̈́́̋́́̂̚̕̚͝͝͠ͅ ̴̢̧͇͖̪͎͎̾̑̀̎̑́̿̆̆͛͐́̋̈́̃͂́̀̈́̑̅̍͒̍̀͋̓̓̽͘̚͝͠w̸̡̖̟̲̯̩̋̈́̈́̉́̏̓̅̎̿̀̇͐̓̽̀̀́͑̀͆̎̓͗̍͛̋́̓̑̐͛͘ḩ̵̧̧̡̢̛͖̝͓̞̻̩̺̺͍̯͓̥̻͉̭̪͇̝̥̖̦͍̠̤̫͇͓͉̜͚̙͔̪̱̰̘̘̉̐̀̐̐͗̾̽̑̎̓́̔̇̑́̽̋̊̈̔̀́͊͌̓͘̕͘͘͠a̵̧̡̨̡̧̛̛̛̺̳̙͚̖̜͎͖̗̗̭͔̝̗̺̪͓̠̖̬͍̺͚̖̻̬͙̩̖̭̫͈̞̫̯̗̙͙̲̯̫̥̯̒̌̋͛̄͊̈̄̓͒̂̐͗̋̃͂͊́͐̈́́̎̈̀̒̽̐͛̏̐̌́̈́͂̊͂̇̾́̊̋͗̕͜͠ͅt̴̡̛͉̙͎̹̘̭̙͕̝̠̖̮̤̬̭̯̺̻̞̣̻̤̱̟͇̩̮͈̦̩͇̹̞̜̜̤͇͎͙͓̠̋̌̏̓̽͛͋̆̏̏̉̓͌̍̀̈́͆͘͜͜͜͝ ̷̨̡̢̛̛̟͚̳̝͍̞̬̖͙̳̯̼̯͔͙͙̩̻̤͍͕͉̠͍̠̣̞̤̺̘̞̪̦͍̯̻̗̮̤̮̗͉̣̊̈́̈́͒͊̔̈́͆̓̑̏̿̆̄̂̿͒̒̌́̏͌͛̒̆́̕̚͜͝ͅͅh̵̡̩̦͔̣̅̐̐̀̊̀̃̊́̅͗̂̂̍͂̓́͑̒̑̎̎̓̑̋a̸̧̢̡̤͔̣̰̲̣̳͚̟͇̜͚̯͂̽̏̌̀̀̉̅̏̀̉͌̎́̋͐̑̿͒̄̑͗͐̊͊̓̽͘͜͝͠ͅͅḑ̸̢̡̞̖̳̳͉͎̱̣͚͙͇̣̤͔̦̼͉̤̹̙̆̈̎͗̀́́̂̍̄͐̃̈́̓̊̂̀̏͆͗̋͠͝ ̴͓̞̬̗͓̳̼̖̠͎̭̖͕͚͍̼̘̤̞̥̏̈́̄̑͐͒̆̏͊̌͌͜ẖ̷̛͎̌̆̋̾̃̍̍͂́̃͌͒̒̊̄̿̆͗̏̇̃͌͒̿̃͂̄́̎̆͐̎̍̍͛͘͘͠͝a̴̢̨̨̧̡̡̧̛̛͇̟̲͎͎͚̣̤̫͈͍͓̠̲̲͙̱̩͙̲̮͈̯̫̹͙̝͇̬͚͇̩̮͙̖͍̥̦̣͌̄̐̋͐͗̃̃́̈̀̽͒̈́̀̅̍͆̉͌͊́̽̓̕̕̚͘͝͝͝͠ͅp̶̧̥͈͓̠̹̲͍͉̜̟͉̱̯͍͉̙͎̩̬̝̟̳͇͍̖̪̽͒͜ͅp̵̡̨̧̡̡̛̲̘̙̙̤̺̭̖̫̜͔̠͉̤͓̼͕̬̲̘̝̣͓̘̱̺̮̱̰̼̻͇̣̪͎̞̮̱͙͔̫͒̈́̔̋̐̓̏̔̃̃̾͌̀̋̋́̍̾́̊͛̒̈́̒̽́͌̔́̃̔̅̉̒̚͜͜͜͝͝͝͝͠͝ę̸̢̳̰̱̤͚̙̬̱̖̤̣̲̰͍̥̮̙̌͆̅̔̾̓̑̓̔̈́́͑̊͂̌͊̓̍͗́̎̀̈́͗̒̓͗̀̀̚͘͠͝ń̶̢̛̛͕̖̰͉̗̙̩̣͚͎͔̺̔̾̎̽̂̊̄̉̅͗͐̈́̀̊̉͘͝͝ȇ̷̢̢̡̡̬̲̗̺̻̼̮̹̯̟̻͈̠̥̥̫̖͙̖͉̠̼̘̝̹̙̳͖͍̝̫̝̝̮̱̙͈̱̰͔̪̲̓̽̕͘͜͝ͅd̸͓̥̭̥́͊̀͋̏̈̒̅̀̀́͋͗̈̍͆̐̒̂̒́̀́̂͌̍̌́̍̔͋̔̔̈́́͐͌̓̚̕͝. It felt weird talking to him – seeing him again after all these years. As if his face had changed throughout the years, but instead of the nature of the natural human process of aging, it felt– ơ̶̢͙̙͕͍̹͌͗͋͐̀̎͑̀͋̓̌̎̀̌̅̃̒͋͆̾̃̅̾̇͆͐̉̑̔̇̓̉͘͝͝͠͠͝͝t̴̨̛̘̮̦̫̮͉̙̪͕͎̟̆̒̃͑̓͐̌̑̏̆̆͌̅͊͑̿̇̎̎͘͘͜h̸̗̜̱͌̄͗̍̑̀̍̒e̴̛̱̣̳̰̭̟̱͙͔̼͕̭͖̠̣̣̙̙̘̰͈̗̮͈̲̹͖͔̻̣̪͖͆͆͋̓͑͂́̀͗̂̐̄̄̓͝͝ŗ̶̡̨̧̡̧̡̡̧̨͇̟̩̭̯̞̜͇͎̜̫̯̘͇̝͚͚̻̗͓̯̙̟͇̭̝͈̘̦̭̮̘̽͗͊͐͂̋͗̓̐̃̆̀̔̄͛̆͛̽͂̒͆̀̏̏͒͌̌̋̉͊̉͛͐̊́̈͂̀̎̈́̿̿̏̑͘̚̕͘͜͜w̵̡̧͈̼͇̘̭̪̱̻̼̭͙̠͉͙̥̩̳̭͈̼͆̈͂̍͂̉́͑̕͜͜ͅǫ̷̨̨̩̺̼̮̩̗͈̳̘͔̞͈̗̺̩̦̩͙̫̦̮̤̠̞̗͔̞̥̳̠͎͚͈̯̦͎̭̞̠̭̿͌̏̿͋͗̈́̒̓̏͆͋̉̇̉̆͊́̌̌̒̏͐̇̇̍̀̌̐͌̿́̃̅̚͘͘̕͜͜͜͠͠͝͠͝͠͝ͅŗ̸̨̡̧̛̼̰͔͉̻͖̗̞͎͙͓̙̞̦͙̻̰̳͔̱͈͌̎̈́̈̽̐̔͂͛͋͛̍͛̐́͛̋̄͊͂̑̃̓̋̍̇̏̈́͋̾̔̀̽̋̉̏͆̇͋̈̉͑̏̉͜͝͠ͅl̷̢̧̢̧̢̛̛̫̼͙͚̬̖̭̞̖̲̠̱͇̙̺̜͇̳̟̯͓̩͔̩͒̓̀̾̅͊̏͗̆̃̃͐̋̔͛͌̈̉̈͒͐̎̔̃̿̃̾̇̎̅͒͋̐̏̄̕̕̕͜͜͠͠͝d̷̢̨̛̛̛͍͚̣̮̻̹͕̫͕̻̥͔̯̰͚̞̳̙͈̟͎͔̞̜̻̙̳̜̗̠̬̲͎̖̝̭͍̠̑̿́͊͐̈́͆̇͌̂͆̓̋̿̈́̐͛́͐̿̒́̐̕̕͘̕͜͜͠͝͝ļ̶̨̢̡̛̬͎̗͚̥͍̞͔̦̰̘̱̼̞̰̣̪͔͈͚͌̊̾̐̽̓͛̇̅̇͊̆́̃͛̄̂́̾̓̆͂͊̉̎̃͘̚͝y̴̨̢̡̗͉̭͔̳͎̜̩͓̱͉̬̱̬̗̗̮̬̥͕͕̺̹̻͇͒͗̔͗̀̃̓̅̀̀͗͆͑͗. Fuck, he sighed, his gaze fixed on the screen. He shifted his weight slightly, fingers tapping on the back of his phone. He felt uneasy, jumpy even; probably due to the lack of sleep from the night before. Isaiah rejected the call and decided to text him instead: 'Gonna call you back asap. Currently working.'

Two days later, after coming back from a long night of meeting up with his colleagues, having drinks, talking about manly things such as sports, monstertrucks and tits, Hunter was slightly drunk. Thus he had the same sensation all of us have, when we had one or fourteen drinks too many: He was hungry and in desperate need for something good. Eating in the kitchen, minding his business, he let his gaze wander until his eyes focused, locking upon familiar features at the end of the hallway. Violet was peeking at him from around the corner, only her eyes visible, wide open, almost unnatural looking, the rest of her body hidden behind the wall. Upon trying to focus and rubbing his eyes, she was gone. All he heard were fast footsteps stealing away from the hallway. It didn't sound like someone was running though, more like an animal fleeing from the intruder of their natural habitat. However, we know  the more our vision declines, the more frequently hallucinations occur. And I told you about how scientists were able to demonstrate that these hallucinations originate in the same brain regions where actual perceptions are processed – and not in the areas where images that arise from our imagination are created. This explains why so many people believe their hallucinations to be real – and yet, Hunter thought he was drunk and his mind played tricks on him. Speaking of your mind's playing tricks on you: Do those hear strange noises at night sometimes that keep you awake? Not the voices in your head, but your neighbors having the time of their lives, the police out and about on duty or the 826th party down the road? 

When nighttime brings unsettling sounds that make your heart race, the new earplugs from HUSH are your answer. Constructed with high-density memory foam, they effectively block out the eerie noises, letting you rest easy and help you fight your sleep paralysis demons easily. Ideal for those who are sensitive to sound, you'll find yourself sleeping through the night all safe and sound. Visit hush.com and use the promo code 𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐃 for 15% off your first purchase. Thank you HUSH for sponsoring this episode and thank you for the countless nights you helped me sleep through.

Violet seemed off after that. She rarely spoke, sometimes it felt like she stared right through her husband. On other days, he caught her just staring at him. Smiling. As if she was daydreaming about something. Her smile felt uncanny, he told me, you know, like these AI generated pictures or– robots even! Upon asking her if she was alright, she always nodded her head and continued the things she was working on. There were nights Hunter laid awake at night, Violet missing from her side of the bed. Whereas to me that sounds like an open invitation to sleep in my favorite position of them all – the spread eagle – things wouldn't be half as unsettling if it wasn't for the noises. Again, fast footsteps, too fast for anything humanoid.

So we waited. I told Hunter it was fine with me if he caught up on some sleep and I'd keep vigil, to convince myself what was going on. I mean, if she was truly visiting him every night, indifferent to where he was staying, why should she stop now? The first two hours were rather uneventful. My trusty Switch was keeping me company, I had insanely good runs playing 'The Binding Of Isaac' – until I heard a noise. It sounded like a knock but– I mean, Hunter never told me that Violet seemed like the girl to knock per se. If she truly lost her mind and was out for– revenge? A night of fun? Why on earth would she knock? I checked the door, stood outside for a while, shining my flashlight into the very far corners of the property, gaze wandering from the vending machine, to every car in the lot, even to the adjacent rooms. Nothing. There was no one there. 

Heading back inside, nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Hunter had told me Violet had watched him sleep from time to time, standing outside the window, her breath on the window, but even as I checked, still, no one's there. Getting back into the game and my trusty Switch, minutes passed until– 

Cutting the recording a second time, he listened more attentively to his surroundings. There was a rustle, but wasn't there something else? Was that a whisper? His phone buzzed again, recieving an answer from the same person who tried to call him earlier.  Ǐ̷̧̢̧͍̺͔̪̭͎̳̥͚̳̥̬͎͕̹̝̺̮̟̈̅̽͆͗̂̉̋̓̃́'̶̨̡̡̧̧̨̧̢̞͙̖̤̙̤̱̗̣̙͖̘͍͖͔̹̬̯̤̻͇͈͉̖̻̞̩͉͖̗̮̬͖̭͈̦̙̳̘̯̈́̀͆̀̐̉̓̅̓̅̓̔̄̈́͊͋͘̚ͅͅv̷̼͈̥̯̜͕͆̔̄̇͑̚e̷̢̡̩͖̣͇̯̮͎͖̼̲̤̯̜̠͓͕̝̤̬̜̤̥̺͎̗͙̮͈̅̉̈̔͆̏̔̃̍͛͑͆͌̌̇̌̃̿͌̋̓̊̓͊̋͒͋̋͑̾̑͐́̒̿̍͆͘͠͝ ̶̫̝̯̜̫̙̐̀f̸̨̨̨̢̨̳̟̖̻̙̖͓͍͕͓̣͔̞̩͉͔̫͎̭̼̜͇͎͙͇̳̤̝̩̻̝̩͖̜̖̯̩̩͆̏̍̀̀̑̅̀̌̋̉͛̄̈̀̃͗̐̈̌͋͒͐̅̀̒̕͘͝ͅǫ̶̢̢̡̧̛̛̫̞̞̖̯͇͚̭̮͖̈́͐̈́̊̏͆̈̋̃͐̎͛̏͌͆̆̀̇͌͛̐̌͋̉͑̿́̈́̚͘̚̚͘̕͝͠͝͠ͅu̷̧̧͙͚͚̟̞̜͖̲̦͈̠̘̥̳̠̜̻̮̙̳͊̾̔͆̾͌̄͗́̆͆͆̀͐͋̃͌͛̑͗̉͒͐̊͗̎͐̎̃̈́̔͐̌̄̽̃̂͒̾̐͑́̈́͘͘͜͠͠͠ņ̴̨̢̝̗̹͖̗̳̪̙̳̱̳̠̥̯̖͍͕̘̥̝̫̤̲̣̠̺̤́̈́̀̚͝͠d̷́͛̍̿̍̆̓̂̏̋͗̀̈́̈́̽̉̍̄͗̾͑͊̽̿́̒̔̋͑̀͐͆̕̕͘͘̚͝��̢̨̡̨̘̜͉̙̖̌̋͐́̎̃̀̿̓͝ͅͅ ̸̧̢̣̝̞͕̪̫̤̯̣͕̯̖̹̩̬̥̪͉̮̺͇̥͓̼̼̙̫̠̌ͅͅͅͅÿ̷̛̪͍̾̎̋̇̎̆̂̿̔̈̍̐̉͛̂͆̽̈̒̈́͗̅̋́͊̈̄̐̚ö̴̞́̋̊̊̃̔̇̀͑̈́͋̏̔̾̓̀͐̃͛̄̾̏̾̉̉͋̊̒͂̈̽͛͋̑̕͘̕̕̕͝u̶̧̢̠̦̝̙̖̦̺͍̲̱͍̥̘̺̥͓̫̮̗͐͊̊͒̅̆̽̆̆̽́̋̇́̾͌̓̅̿́̉͒̉̽̎̉́̊͘͘̚͘͠.̵̛̛̛̭͓̂̍̿̅̽͊̎̿̍̈̅̑̀͋̐͆̇̇̅̇̋̂͊̀́̈͂̾̊͌̈́͆̅̄̍̔̕̚̚̕̚͝͠͝ ̸̢̧̨̧̯̠̖̯̟̳̳̩̪̦̮̲͕͉͕́͛̅̎̓͂̈̓̓̑͆̔̃̓́́͝ͅͅ:̸̧̢̡̢͍̠̹̳̗̣̱̳̻͎̩̪̫͎͕͇̭̱̥͍͚̦̞̯̩̭͓̠͙̉͐̍̋̽̒͐)̶̢̬̦͔̼͉̹̪̮̖̜̣̱̩̜̠̮̖̤͉̤̠͚̘̻̳͚̪͙̬͎̰͍͔̯̦̳̿̈͋͂̏̎̈́̾͑̈̓̏̓̓̋̀́̔͘͜͜͠͠ͅ

I heard a noise. Like an animal pacing, but it sounded uncomfortably close. There was nothing outside, I checked the room Hunter was sleeping in but there was nothing. When I turned around, I saw a set of widened eyes, peeking at me from the bottom of the doorframe from the hallway. The light was reflecting in her– its eyes, like a predator lurking in the shadows, ready to hunts its prey. A long strand of dark hair was falling across her forehead, she moved her head slightly, tilted it. As if she was irritated, yet amused by the sight of me. I mean, I've seen my fair share of weird shit and read a lot about the 'power of imagination', but I assure you: This ain't fucking it. Violet's head started to rise, she seemed to get up as I stood there frozen in the doorframe across the hallway. Her hair was moving with her. It took me some time to realize that she wasn't necessarily getting up, but instead she seemed to crawl on the wall, finally positioning herself at the upper edge of the doorframe. Her hair was now dangling, pointing towards the floor, her face more visible. That was the moment I realized what Hunter had meant with the uncanny smile. Violet's features seemed off, it reminded me of Alternates, her smile seemed forced, too wide, all of her teeth were showing. Her eyes wide, reflective, like a deer in headlights. Until she vanished.

Again: Fast footsteps. Then silence.

Hunter woke up from the noise. He asked me if I was alright, standing in the doorframe, too stunned to move. Frozen. That's when I saw her again, unblinking, reflective eyes and grinning wide. She saw him, knew he was there and that's all she needed to know. All she needed to see. He was her prey, I was an irrelevant obstacle and no greater threat. She was peeking at the both of us, focusing Hunter, scuttling slowly towards us on all fours, leaving her cranny from behind the kitchen counter. Her movement seemed otherwoldly, bending her joints and body parts inhumanly, putting her legs in front of her arms when she moved. Both of us must've thought that her smile couldn't get any wider, but we were mistaken. This was her definition of fun. And trust me when I say that it wasn't mine.  Violet stopped again, tilting her head to the side. 

Again: Fast footsteps as she approached us, grinning even wider. Until we shut the door. As we both pressed against it, all we could feel, in between fast breaths and paralyzed by fear, was the intense, loud banging against the door. Relentlessly hammering against the wood, trying to force her way in, we kept the door shut with all we had. For twenty-seven minutes. Again, fast footsteps. ⸻ Then silence.

  ©redits⸻ heavily inspired by this story (please read it, it's fantastic!) and ofc the final scenes of the masterpiece that is ari aster's »hereditary«)  

[ordinaryschmuck]

Good things that happened today:

Read a lot of kind words given to me after last night's little...breakdown. Thank you all for the nice things you said and don't worry. I'm not going anywhere, not just yet.

Got some positive responses to today's part of the Full Family AU. Glad you're all really interested.

Found a way to make watching Iron Fist tolerable (It's messing around with my Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles figures as the episode plays. Suck it, Finn Jones, those are the REAL martial arts warriors I love).

Had a relaxing day at work, even got to leave early because I wasn't needed.

Bought a Marvel Encyclopedia and it's now the coolest thing I currently own. Yay.

Let my English Major and Creative Writing Minor flex a bit and had fun with it. Glad to know education WASN'T a waste.

Good things about me:

I have decent media analysis.

I am a better person today than I was in the past.

I am not a loser.

I have good writing skills.

I have good tastes in media.

And these are NOT me being egotistical. These are self-affirmations I tell myself so I don't kill myself one day. I could give less of a shit if they're true or not anymore. I'll take saying what feels right to me while being as honest with myself as I can be.

[asordinaryppl]

A3! Main Story: Part 4 - Act 13: Budding Spring - Episode 25: I'm Home

Izumi: Can you see me, everyone? Is the sound coming through?

Citron: “It’s A-Okay~!”

Sakuya: “It’s good!”

Tsuzuru: “Where are you right now, Sakuya?”

Chikage: “Why does this look like the Edo Era?”

Citron: “Did you use a tie man slip!?”

Tsuzuru: “Time machine.”

Sakuya: “Ahaha. When I told the director about having remote rehearsals, they graciously let me use the theater’s stage.”

Izumi: I’m glad you all look healthy. It’s good to see your faces.

Tsuzuru: “As for us, it doesn’t feel like it’s been that long since we last saw each other because we’ve been talking in BlooCha.”

Izumi: Oh, you did say you’d try using that. Is it different from LIME?

Sakuya: “The timing of our messages was weird because of our time differences, but it’s like a message board or an exchange diary, so it’s fun.”

Tsuzuru: “When we all get the timing right, it really feels like we’re together in the same room.”

Masumi: “You’re as loud as always while I’m trying to study.”

Tsuzuru: “Oh, yeah. Masumi, when are you getting your learner’s permit?”

Izumi: Eh, you’re getting a license?

Masumi: “I’m attending driving school. I’m getting a learner’s permit soon. I want to put you on the passenger’s seat as soon as possible.”

Citron: “I will be in charge of the backseat!”

Sakuya: “Masumi-kun seems like he’d be good at driving.”

Chikage: “We’ll leave the role of the Spring Troupe’s chauffeur to Masumi from now on.”

Masumi: “I’ll get a two-seater.”

Tsuzuru: “You really don’t want anyone other than the Director on board.”

Izumi: Itaru-san will be a little late, didn’t he. Let’s try adjusting without him first.

Izumi: Today’s purpose is to prepare for when you all return next week, so you can take it easy.

Izumi: If you can move, please do so. But if there’s no space, just saying the lines is fine.

Izumi: I’ll let you know about any changes to the production as we get to those points.

-

Izumi: — Okay, let’s stop here for now. It’s been a while, but you all remember everything well.

Sakuya: “This was our first time practicing remotely, so it was all kind of new.”

Masumi: “We’re not as close as we’d be in real life, so I feel like I’m relying on my memory of everyone’s acting.”

Chikage: “There’s some lagging, so we’ve got a few communication issues.”

Citron: “I want to practice pace to pace with you all again as soon as possible~!”

Masumi: “Face to face.”

Tsuzuru: By the way, Sakuya, your sword fighting’s gotten a lot better.

Sakuya: “Eh, you really think so!?”

Sakuya: “To be honest, I’ve been focusing on practicing the sword fights in my current performance, so I can put the knowledge I gain to good use for Romeo too.”

Izumi: Your progress is showing.

Tsuzuru: “Ah, then, in that case–”

Itaru: “Sorry, I’m late.”

Izumi: Good work today.

Sakuya: “Good work!”

Citron: “It’s time!”

Izumi: Please start from the scene with Mercutio, Tybalt and Father Lawrence.

Itaru: “Got it.”

-

Izumi: You were all a little stiff at first, but that faded when you got used to remote practicing.

Izumi: I’m glad the Spring Troupe’s atmosphere hasn’t changed.

Sakuya: “We can act even when we’re apart.”

Tsuzuru: “We may be in different places, but it’s nice how it feels like we’re all connected on top of the same stage.”

Izumi: Okay, I’ve relayed all production-related changes to you, so we can end practice here. 

Masumi: “If we’re done, do you have a moment?”

Izumi: Hm? What is it?

Masumi: “I sent you a proposal on LIME just now. Take a look.”

Izumi: … A plan proposal? Eh!? Did you write this?

Izumi: (Amazing, the contents are so detailed that it looks like a corporate proposal.)

Masumi: “I’ve been learning a lot of things in the promotion department I’ve been interning in.”

Izumi: I see… I think it’s really well put together. I’ll bring it up to Sakyo-san.

Masumi: “Was I of help?”

Izumi: Of course! Gathering all of these by yourself must’ve been difficult. Thank you!

Masumi: “Not at all. I’m glad I got a chance to realize how difficult what you do is.”

Masumi: “I’ll help you too from now on.”

Izumi: If you say so, I’ll be counting on you.

-

Sakuya: I’m home!

Izumi: Welcome home. You’re the first one.

Sakuya: The plan was for me to leave tomorrow, but the organizer scheduled an off day for me today…

Sakuya: I wanted to be the first one here so I can say “Welcome back” to everyone else.

Sakuya: Because I was really happy when I went off by myself and everyone welcomed me back…

Izumi: I see. I’m sure you’re looking forward to everyone coming back.

Sakuya: I am. I want to practice with everyone as soon as possible. I thought a lot about my acting plan while I was away.

Sakuya: I was inspired by the performances of other companies, and I learned a lot, so I’ve got all kinds of ideas…

Sakuya: There are so many things I want to talk about and try out.

Sakuya: Speaking of which– I’m going to the practice room for a bit!

Izumi: What? Already?

Sakuya: I feel like moving my body all of a sudden!

Izumi: Hehe, take it easy and make sure you don’t exhaust yourself.

-

Sakuya: 1, 2, 3, 4…

Sakuya: (There’s really no other place that calms me like this… It feels like I came back home.)

Sakuya: (Now that I think about it, I wonder where everyone is? It’s about time Citron-san and the others who went abroad would be departing for their journey back home…)

tsuzuru has entered the chat tsuzuru: good morning tsuzuru: i’m packing my things right now, i’m having some trouble because I’ve got too many souvenirs tsuzuru: i’m not sure if the souvenirs i bought for everyone in the company /and/ the souvenirs for my brothers will fit in here tsuzuru: oh, right, i have to remember to pack my computer. i’ll be working til last minute, so i might forget. Curry has entered the chat Curry: i’ll remind you about your pc tomorrow tsuzuru: you’re like a man with many talents To Rorr has entered the chat To Rorr: i am on the verge of eating breakfast! i will head to the airport in the afternoon. i can’t wait to be surrounded by everyone! UC has entered the chat UC: I have a connecting flight, so I’m about to board the plane for Narita Airport. I’ll probably arrive at the dorm tomorrow afternoon. Saku has entered the chat Saku: I returned a day earlier. Stay safe on your way back, everyone!

Sakuya: (Itaru-san is rarely online. He must be really busy…)

Tsumugi: Welcome back, Sakuya-kun.

Banri: Welcome back.

Sakuya: I’m back!

Tenma: Practicing already? I’ll help out.

Sakuya: Thanks! Can I ask you to be my opponent in a sword fight?

Sakuya: I was thinking of taking it easy, but I’ve been restless ever since I stepped into the practice room.

Tsumugi: I think I understand the feeling.

Tenma: I’ll tag along till you’re satisfied.

Banri: Let’s confirm the production-related matters while we’re at it, then.

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NOTES:

(1) an acting plan is, quite literally, a plan an actor makes for how they will use their expressions and actions, in order to prevent focusing on only one part of their performance and/or to prevent stiffness. i could not for the life of me find information on this in english, so i'm not sure if it's called something entirely different.

[millerflintstone]

Back in August of 2019 when my sister passed away, one of my cousins in Guatemala took my mom in. My mom was 79 and had not been taking care of herself. My sister had not been taking care of herself or my mom either. This cousin lived two doors down from my mom and sister. Unfriendly and I stayed with them when we visited in 2020 before the pandemic hit. This cousin lived with her mom and uncle (my first cousins - my mom's oldest sister's kids), and her two boys. They were 17 and 10 at the time.

This cousin is a couple of years younger than me. I am eternally grateful that she and her family were able to take care of my mom. At that time, I had been scheduled for a hysterectomy where we weren't 100% sure if the findings were just going to be just endometriosis or endo with cancer because I had been bleeding a lot. In the time it took me to heal, a global pandemic started. When I was finally able to get to Guatemala, my mom's medical team advised against her traveling at the time because of her COPD and other health concerns. Then, the pandemic caused lockdowns so even if she had been okay to travel, she didn't get the chance to do so. My mom passed in 2021.

All of this backstory is to share that part of me did feel super responsible for helping my cousin when I could. I mean, how do you repay that kind of generosity, right? The big thing she helped with was getting the house my dad bought my grandparents transferred to my mom's name. It was in my sister's name. HorribleAunt initially wanted to be able to "help" me in getting things fixed because she wanted her grubby hands on it. I completely shut her out. The house got transferred into my cousin's name and my mom's name. Now that she's passed, it's my cousin's now as far as I'm concerned and I'm glad the legal steps went through. I wanted that house to stay in the family for family that needed it. It's not in the best shape but she has improved it.

I was able to continue to help out them out financially after my mom passed until I quit my job last year. I had to let my cousin know I couldn't continue and explained my burnout and depression that just cumulated after the past 5 years. We eventually also had to let them know we couldn't share our Netflix account anymore because of the password thing they did and also because we were cutting costs.

A couple of weekends ago, she messaged me for money because her youngest was at the clinic due to severe constipation. I had to break down some of our current debt to her because while we are better off than she is, it honestly wouldn't take a whole lot of bad things happening for us to be in danger. We're not in immediate danger, but we're also not the answer. I was able to help a little but I didn't divulge the minor jobs I currently have or the job offer I recently took.

Then last weekend, she asked me if in the future she thought I'd be able to help her come to the States. I was honest and told her I absolutely could not promise that right now and had to redefine our financial concerns just for ourselves. She has no concept of the expense of life in America. She suggested her selling the house and looking for something smaller but I told her not to look into that. I had gone looking for the possibility of a different house for my mom and sister years ago and was surprised to find that at the time, the prices were not much different than in GA and that it would just be another expense.

I was talking to Unfriendly about it and he also agreed for them to not sell the house to help us.

This cousin was diagnosed with BPD so I'm not sure if she was off meds and having an episode or what. She seems to want to escape her life (don't we all?) but I am not the answer to that. I finally feel free of the obligation I felt towards my mother and sister. I'm not continuing that on. I don't want to feel that ever again.

[popchoc]

Grey's 20x04

Or: The big return of Dr. Arizona Robbins!

Boy, was it good to see her again, shining bright as always and looking taller than ever (okay, she was standing next to Bailey for most of the time, but still - lol). I'm gonna be honest though: the writing this episode wasn't particularly good (imo), and many parts were rushed which didn't help either (I just hate it when someone says 'no' and then someone else comes with three semi-profound lines and the first one goes 'okay then' just like that. Even when it's one of our beloved super docs.) Also there were ZERO remarks about current life in NY, or about their shared past except for 'this room looks different' which felt like a waste. If it weren't for some very typical Arizona traits that made me go 'ah there she is!' this guest part could've really been anyone.

Sooo, let's try again in early season 21, shall we?!? *insert puppy eyes*

The rest of the episode didn't really stand out either. It was a bit like S19 last week: too much, and too messy. It felt like they kept cramming people in (yet where's Helm?!), just for the sake of it, at the expense of the stories that were actually worth telling. I'm sorry, but I'm just not feeling Teddy's story, and Richard please, retire already - you've been talking about it since season 2 fcol!!

In the meantime we could have had an actual investigation about those season finale shenanigans (yes, they finally addressed them choosing Teddy over their dying patient!!), including interviewing the attendings who were very MIA at that crucial moment, and work with the consequences of those conclusions (instead of Bailey's personal ones), besides - as said - a better written story around Arizona.

The mini arc that I did like was about Jules and her brother (and his patient), that made me see how she learned to scream so well (see: last week) and let to more bonding between her and Mika. Mika in general was a blast again, and I'm glad she got some rectification.

My personal highlight this week though, was Amelia taking the stairs. Cause in this universe, we all know what that foreshadows... hahaha.

[sampilled]

God, the number of times the word bitch was used was bad, but I'm pretty sure season four also saw the rise of calling women sluts and whores? It's breathtaking how much this show hates women. And my god, I'm afraid to even think about how much it hated women of colour. Also, this is petty, but it is currently an important Hindu holiday, so it's on my mind: Kali is worshipped as the destroyer of evil, what a waste of storytelling potential that was.

yes they love to slut shame <3333

they have so few women of colour and its always weird racist vibes

like the entirety of route 666 was a strange choice for a show that has... no regular black characters and it has that "black person assumes the white person is racist but then the amazing not racist white person makes them feel stupid for feeling that way" which.... is my most detested trope

tamara and Isaac from the magnificent seven ep in s3 getting trapped in what looks like a skinhead bar and getting attacked

like this is all clearly meant to bring something to mind.

and in season 6 episode "family matters" the plot of the week references a young black boy who was killed by police (and then cas tortures the little brother)

and its not that i think its bad for things like this to be included in horror, it can be done really well and be really impactful. its just that the writers of supernatural are clearly (mostly if not entirely) white and also really ignorant and it makes all of this come across very tone deaf and horrible like including a plot about police brutality and having one of your main characters hurt a young black boy during it and face no consequences and none of the other main characters really say or do anything about it and the narrative of the show promptly forgets about it?? no super woke guys keep it up, i'm so glad you felt the need to include that serious social issue and handle it with such care

but on a slightly more lighthearted note, i agree. kali could have carried her own season, a hindu goddess??? that couldve been so cool but i have to admit i dont know much about her other than she likes dogs? and is the goddess of war

(many of the creatures who were introduced in one off eps could carry their own seasons too) and i think the way the writers just kept going further and further into christian ideology was a real weak point for the show and i don't think anyone would have cared if in season 10 or something they decided the major plotline would be about big foot or ogres or the lock ness monster on something cuz lets be honest, sam and dean are the reason people kept watching, not cuz they wanted to find out more about the darkness or the mark of cain

[apparently-artless]

oh my god WAAAAAAAA THANK YOU SO MUCH ART!!!! the gifset is SO so so beautiful you have no idea!!!!!!!!! i cannot stop watching it over and over again. the colours are absolutely perfect, and the gif transitions are so smooth!!!!!! i'm so so happy aaaaa i can't believe something so beautiful was made for my request 😭😭😭 i really appreciate it, thank you soo much!!!! the bokuyaba fandom is truly lucky to have you in it, your edits are always so spectacular and i always enjoy looking at them. im so glad you had fun making it too!!!! thanks a million and i hope you have a wonderful day, week, month and year <333 !!!!!!!! 💛💛💛

hi, willow!! thank you so much for sending me another message to let me know of your thoughts!! this message really made me happy. ( ´ ∀ `)ノ～ ♡

i also noticed that you pinned my post on your blog, i was practically blushing when i saw the label on top. (⁄ ⁄>⁄ ▽ ⁄<⁄ ⁄)

in all honesty, i was very aware of the scene that you were referring to when i saw your request. i was also thinking of making a set for that scene but it got buried in all the current series i am watching. the scene itself was already beautiful and to be honest i am not good at scenes with sunset gradient. and i guess that's another reason why i didn't made this set until you requested it. and so i took it both as a challenge and an opportunity. who knows, i might end up gif-baiting other people to watch it?? lol

and yes!! i did have fun making the set. i had to combine some gradients with different blending modes and i had to manipulate the level adjustment layer a lot for each gif. i was very concerned that i might end up ruining an already beautiful scene so i tried not to deviate too much from the original colors but at the same time still incorporate my own coloring style.

i hope you don't mind me putting the comparison of the original vs my coloring. this is just to show you how much i had fun making this edit. i am also very satisfied with the result if i do say so myself. hehehe. ^^

anyways, it doesn't matter if other people don't appreciate it as long as the person who requested the set liked it, is what i thought. so i'm very happy when i saw your message and your tags in the post when you reblogged it.

bokuyaba is a dark horse anime series for me. it's something i watched simply because i wanted to explore different genre every season. i was thinking of dropping it after 1-2 episodes but i'm glad that i didn't. i am not an avid fan of romance, especially if the main characters are young but this series has something special to offer. it's one of my favourite romance anime now with school setting.

SO TO ALL THE PEOPLE WHO DROPPED THIS ANIME, GIVE IT A TRY AGAIN. AND THEN SCREAM AT ME IN MY INBOX FOR WASTING YOUR TIME IF YOU STILL WOULD NOT LIKE IT AFTER WATCHING AT LEAST THE FIRST SEASON. XD

[ineffablebookgirl]

Thanks for the tag @mycatnamedlily !

Tag 9 people you want to get to know better.

Last song: Not exactly sure, but let's say it's "Canciones de Amor" by Julieta Venegas.

Last show: Last show I watched all the way through is Young Royals, but that was a couple months ago now.

Currently watching: Just finished the first episode of the new series of Taskmaster and it is *so good* I mean it's always good, but I was laughing out loud from the get-go, and this is the first series in a while where I really don't know anything about any of the contestants. I also still need to finish The Sandman and I really want to watch the new season of Shadow & Bone!

Currently reading: I ordered Open Veins of Latin America by Eduardo Galeano after reading a quote from the introduction on here. It is gorgeously written and translated, it's the kind if book that makes me remember that I love to read. The content is really difficult, but important to read. I've been really focusing on learning more about Latin American history, and I'm glad I came across this book.

Current obsession: Probably Taskmaster if I'm being honest. I've been listening to the podcast on my commute, and it's just such good, wholesome fun, with very very little drama, and I love that.

No-pressure tags:

@skinnyscottishbloke @turniptitaness @inconveniently-discorporated @barrowsteeth @itcamefromthesea-blog @chaotic-autumn @skyisverybored

[bengiyo]

Never Let Me Go Ep 10 Stray Thoughts

Last week, our time on the beach came to an abrupt and painful end as Mam lost her life trying to protect her son. Neungdiao spent one final evening with Palm before drugging him and leaving him alone. Meanwhile, Ben learned about Chopper's dad's violence, and gave Chopper an ultimatum.

Ah, we're seeing more of that night. I do love when shows do this. It feels far more bittersweet.

Oh, Neungdiao. It's so sad that the only way he thinks he can cherish someone is to keep them as far away from him as possible.

How big is this tub?? These are not small boys. I just know hair and makeup is so nervous that water will touch their heads.

I like the harsh cut to Neungdiao alone within the same audio track. Connects the two scenes and turns up the melancholy by letting us know Neungdiao was reminiscing.

Of course we can't skimp on the product placement. Can't go to war if you ain't cute. Make sure you moisturize that face.

Episode Title: Me

Oh good. Neungdiao can do a proper Windsor knot.

Oh but Neungdiao's guards look sloppy. WTF, guys?

Back in this office, and Kit has planted his ass firmly on the throne he thinks should be his.

I love how the conversations in this office get uglier and less veiled as the show goes on. Nuengdiao has a temper, and it is being tightly controlled here.

I was hoping we'd get a scene where Nuengdiao went to check on his mother's condition. He can't leave her unprotected now that he's declared war on his uncle and Phuwin is pretty good at these kinds of somber scenes.

112/67 is pretty good for blood pressure.

Of course he goes to Palm's room at night. He's made the lonely choice, but he's a man that yearns.

Oh, I'm loving these memories of their time on the island. I also like that Nuengdiao is a nerd in his own memories as he regales Palm in details about a study he read. Info dumping as flirtation is underutilized.

I like how Palm flirts back with Nuengdiao by using the knowledge he just gave him.

Oh, Nuengdiao. What will you do with the bed and clothes no longer smell like him?

Poor, Chopper. You may have an incredible actor playing you, but Nuengdiao isn't wrong to mistrust you.

They use Pawin's height and Phuwin's stature really well in this pool scene. Nuengdiao is feeling himself how, so he towers over Phum.

Nuengdiao being honest with his subordinates about his limitations, and encouraging them to share their ideas, is a nice scene. Helps us understand the extent of his ego.

Okay, so Woo paid them and that's how we got the phone. I'm glad that got cleared up.

For once, I like that the suit seems slightly off.

"I want to give my boyfriend a ride, too." 🥴

The driver has been waiting five minutes for this face journey to end.

Uh oh, Ben is death flagging on this redemption signalling. He is right though, Nuengdiao is harsh.

Chopper is going to end up killing his dad to protect Ben and Nuengdiao.

Finally, we're trying to help Chanon.

You just knew Palm wouldn't stay away. But also, where are Nuengdiao's current guards and how did Palm get past them?

I love Phuwin; you can feel the ache coming off of him in Palm's presence.

So these other bodyguards didn't notice Palm tailing Nuengdiao for two weeks? Fired.

Oh, gay boys and their moms.

Palm pulled out that bracelet and was like, "Don't make me tell you twice."

Ugh, I just knew someone was spying. Seriously, these new guards are so bad.

I just don't see Palm turning on Nuengdiao, so I'm excited to see how that threat unfolds in the next episode.

[star-mum]

How Ep 7 should’ve actually happened if not for Plot™

OKAY– so I was going to write this as like a scene rewrite BUT i don't want to sksksksks soooorry :D EITHER WAY LET'S GET TO IT BABIES

posting this specially for my angels @pinkchubbiebunnie and @trice-divergent thank you so much for letting me take so much of y'alls time with my bullshit :3

For the purpose of this, I’m going to assume the accusation scene happens somewhat similarly, but the only one who's actually suspicious of Jason is Rachel, cause her thing is directly linked to him and she's more angry and upset than anything. The others will bring the stuff that happened to them but more as in a “huh… something hinky is going on here” and maybe try to investigate it properly

A day after Jason almost dies NO ONE has talked to him until Dawn asks Dick to do it, neither her or Kory seem sure he’s okay enough to do a good job at it – he's obviously distracted with something else. Which leads me to my first 2 points: 1. at least one of them would take that as a clue someone should do a follow up with Jason after Dick talks to him and 2. it's crazy to think that NO ONE ELSE in the entire team didn't even try to check up on Jason – specially Gar or Dawn – that’s stupid at the least and INCREDIBLY out of character at most.

So with that in mind, I'm going to do a character by character “analysis” to show what I think really happened, in an AU where events aren't controlled by Plot™. I'm so glad this is what I'm currently using my psychology education for !! hooray !!

Dick Grayson

i can't say for sure how much of this is an accurate read on Dick’s personality or and how much is just wishful thinking on my part but let's get to it

Even though Dick is – clearly – going through some stuff I think he’d try to be a little more honest with Jason, like actually talk in complete sentences for one, but also actually make sure Jason at least heard him before he bolts out the building. He could've done more, this whole episode Dick is so worried about the past and its implications on him now that he completely ignores pretty obvious warning signs. There's I think 2 things he says that IF FOLLOWED UP BY ACTUAL SENTENCES could have actually meant something:

“Good thing Conner was there -> “Im sorry” SORRY FOR WHAT?????? BE CLEARER PLEASE !!!! Dick does feel responsible for Jason’s kidnapping AND the fall, he knows Conner being there was pure luck, he knows what would've happened if he wasn't – they both do – so apologize like you mean it, say where you failed and what you are sorry for, you can't just hope the other person is going to guess what you meant, SPECIALLY Jason, he doesn't feel cared for, he thinks you're apologizing just to say it, HELP HIM BELIEVE YOU

“All of this is my fault for going alone” -> “No. I don't think that” This ties into the other paragraph but FINISH YOUR SENTENCES !!! SAY WHAT YOU MEAN !!! You could just be saying that to make Jason feel better, thats what hes gonna think anyways, say the words, tell him “I'm sorry I wasn't there for you” “I'm sorry I let you go” “I'm sorry I let you go alone” HE KNOWS Jason is impulsive, he really thought if he let the teens unattended nothing would’ve happen? And YES Jason is grown enough to make his own decisions this isn't ONLY on Dick BUT he could have tried to be a better mentor to him before all this happened, he should tell Jason that

“Rest up” at the risk of sounding repetitive I'm just gonna say, Dick knows Jason is training like that to keep his mind of the bad thing that happened, he’s done it too – probably still does – tell him it that even tho it can help now it won't solve everything forever, connect with him, share your failures and bad experiences with him BEFORE he’s standing on a fucking ledge.

Hank Hall

I fell in love with Hank while writing his part, I'm so sorry

I think Hank would be the 2nd to talk to Jason. First I thought he’d go with Dawn or because she asked BUT !! ACTUALLY !! It makes more sense for it to come from him.

His whole job before coming back to the tower was helping at-risk youth was it not? I know it focused more on addiction but suicidal ideation – and life risking behavior in general – is very linked to people who suffer from any substance abuse, not to mention emotional distress/trauma can be the leading cause for developing it as a coping mechanism (look at me and my professional lingo)

He would recognize the signs, is what I'm saying here. Hank and Jason might not be super tight friends but he cares for the kid, that's clear. I can’t decide how he would approach Jason tho, it could go one of two ways: 1. he uses the training room as an excuse – either during sparring or some other training thing (?) like holding the punching bag for Jason or something, idk im not athletic – so it feels more like a conversation than an intervention AND it would be a good bonding moment for them, to show that even tho they find each other UNBEARABLE, they can still be there for one another OR 2. i did say two ways huh well the second way could be the next morning before everything blows up, he tries – although a little emotionally constipated, cause bro dudes – to have an honest conversation with Jason about the risks of isolating himself after a traumatic experience, THAT approach however – like being more direct – might “scare” Jason a little and make him lash out

Dawn Granger

At first, I had Dawn as the second person who’d talk to Jason, but now I think she’d be third. She's really good at reading people and social situations/cues, so obviously would notice Dick was acting very weird and probably didn’t talk to Jason as well as he could have BUT Hank did go to Jason first, so she’s gonna trust him to do the right thing and talk to the kid when she sees him in the morning – that is, if Hank goes right after dinner, when Jason is still training, which makes the most sense to me.

I think she’d probably talk to Hank first, to see how it went, so she has a better sense of what Jason needs to hear right now. Even if there wasn’t anything to add, she would still wait for him to show up in the common areas — I don’t think she’d go look for him, just wait until “he wants to be found” kinda deal — and the very least tell him she’s glad he’s safe, and offer him a space to talk about what happened. I don’t know how positive of an interaction this would be, but I think anyone — even Jason, in his current emotional state — would find it very hard to snap at Dawn, and IF he did she seems like the person to keep her cool and try and understand their side while still setting down boundaries (she’s so calm when speaking that you’d feel silly for raising your voice, you know?)

Kory Anders

“You're making me feel helpless and I hate feeling helpless” you cannot tell me this woman wouldn't even THINK to check on her number 1 problem child, like that's stupid. HOWEVER I can’t just ignore her reaction to Jason’s death “he made a mistake and didn't learn from it, now he's dead” which is,,, well accurate BUT the problem isn't that Jason “didn't learn his lesson” after Deathstroke, he did, just not the right one – he learned not to trust anyone but himself, people betray him, leave him for dead, accuse him without proof -> instead of learning to lean on and trust others.

So because of that I think she would talk to Jason at some point but not be very nice and sweet about it, she’d be very direct, to make sure this doesn't happen again. Like not mean either, don’t get me wrong, just direct. I think after all the weird inspirational speech vibes from Dick, Hank and Dawn, Jason would appreciate someone talking to him normally and not “babying him”. I'm assuming things don’t escalate so fast at breakfast, so Kory has time after that scene to talk to him

Like I think Kory would also wait until she sees him, instead of seeking him out, and I can definitely hear her saying something like what she said in season 3 -> “you made a mistake, now you have to learn from it, make sure you’re picking up the right lesson”. Probably the most efficient out of everyone, cause she is still holding Jason accountable for his own actions BUT she’s also letting him know he isn’t a lost cause, so even tho he might still say something annoying or even mean back, he WILL think about what she said for the rest of the day

Donna Troy

Donna follows the same like as Kory, very straightforward, although I do think she’d check up on Jason for a more “basic” line, like checking how he’s taking care of himself — if he’s eaten, drank water, also warning him about overworking himself — almost in a casual or even “acidic” way tho —> “there's leftovers in the fridge” instead of asking if he’s eaten, demanding to have the gym to herself when she notices him way too long in there, wordlessly pouring him a glass of water if she’s already getting herself some — she’s more actions than words, to me at least

Garfield Logan

OKAY SO— I realize now I should’ve probably put Gar before Dick for what I'm about to say but idk do that right now. Gar would be the first person to check on Jason after they get back AND it’d go so bad, he’s also the reason dude’s training himself half to death— I'LL EXPLAIN !!!

So Gar is an angel who cares too much for his friends, yes? Of course. AND because of that he feels INCREDIBLY responsible for what happened to Jason: he agreed to go with him check the thing out, didn’t call Dick or tell anyone else where they’d be, agreed to get separated AND didn’t fight harder to go with the older Titans — “maybe with his powers, they’d have a better chance”.

And, unlike Dick, Gar would make that abundantly clear to Jason. But it wouldn’t be well received because Jason isn’t taking Gar’s apology as “I’m sorry I didn’t do more to help you”, he’s hearing it as “sorry I didn’t save you from yourself” WHICH would make him really mad at Gar for “implying” that AND even more mad at himself for doing what he did —> arguing with Gar and then go to the training room to let off some steam from the terrible day/evening he just had

Rachel Roth

I don't know how to say this without making her seem like an asshole but I don't think she would actively check on Jason. There is already so much on her plate because of her powers, she’s still resenting him a bit for what he said, and the mirror thing happens so soon she doesn’t even HAVE time to go and talk to him. I can’t remember now when she argues with Gar but it’d definitely make her even more mad at the whole situation, even if she’s not completely aware she’s projecting that stuff onto her feeling about Jason.

Extra - Zephyr

I wasn't going to, but I love to talk about self inserts/OCs SO if my self insert Zephyr – hero name – was part of this shit show, this is the role I’d want her to play !! : D

Little context: she's my on going self insert for just about anything, literally just me but with powers – if the universe demands – and cooler hair – I missed the days of having fantasy colored hair. She always has some version of “air bending” as her power, cause I noticed that a lot of main casts don't have an air bender in their groups

I imagined her having a kinda bickering rivalry with Jason, nothing too serious but also not super buddy buddy, she doesn't go with him and Gar to check out the thing – she’s not aware they left, until Gar gets back – and when Dick leaves with the older Titans, she follows him after he told her to stay in the tower, cause her powers could be useful – and they are :3 – long story short, instead of Dick catching and then dropping Jason, she manages to stop/catch him with her powers, but before she can start either pulling him back up or lowering him to the ground, Slade sneaks up behind her and knocks her tf out and Jason free falls again. (I HAVE THIS SCENE SO CLEAR IN MY BRAIN !! ITS LIKE REALLY GRUESOME AND EVEN MORE TRAUMATIC FOR JASON :D PLZ LMK IF YOU I SHOULD EXPAND ON THIS !!)

SO— because she got her shits absolutely rocked, she would ALSO be in the medical area, in a different room from Conner, I think either Kory and Dawn would switch places to watch them both OR they would stick to Conner and Rachel would be the one keeping an eye on Zephyr. Considering that the two people who did the most to help Jason got fucking wrecked because of it, I think it’s safe to say he’d feel too guilty to visit any of them.

If we go with Rachel on Z watch duty, I think she’d maybe try and use her powers to heal her, not completely tho cause she’s still unsure about them but enough for Z to be able to at least get up next morning, so after helping Kory out with Conner, Rachel would update Z on most of what happened last night: Conner saving Jason, Dick just leaving in the middle of the night, how Jason is doing, etc.

Now Jason doesn’t really goes to breakfast, and the whole thing with Rachel happens pretty early (everyone is still in the kitchen) SO I think the time Z actually goes downstairs (??? I have no clue what the fucking layout of this tower is like) is when all the yelling starts. Like I said in the beginning, the other guys aren’t gonna accuse Jason cause,,, it doesn’t make sense, so there’s not much to defend him from — maybe just help Rachel calm down “you said he was barely leaving his room for anything other than training, what would he do that,,, now specially?”

And only after everyone else starts sharing the weird things/messages they got she tries to talk to Jason, asking him if he’s okay, if he’s eaten, the basics — in their bickering way like “when’s the last time you drank some water ? your lips look chapped as hell” “why are you looking? 👀” — and then after diffusing some of the tenseness, getting a bit more serious with the questions and genuinely apologizing for dropping him (if he tries to change subject/dismiss her/even walk from her, she’s gonna play the “i'm pretty sure I’m concussed” card so he’ll at least stay put)

[epickiya722]

REACTIONS TO EPISODE 19 - FULL POWER!!

You know what goes on here.

LAST EPISODE'S REACTIONS

And here's the beginning of the one Deku Arc that gets me in my feels.

Yes, give me that Izuku narration! Even though it was just for the letter reading.

Ochaco, don't cry. Please don't cry! 😭

There goes his pose! That he makes looks cooler than Batman.

He looks and depressed already and this arc just started!!

The last time he wore that hoodie was back in season 4.

Oh, it's Shindo and Nakagame!! Grand and fucking Turtle Neck!!! Why is her hero name so funny to me?! 🤣

Shindo and his thot version of Froppy's hero suit. Keep doing you, boo!

It's nice Shindo mentions Ms. Joke since she is their teacher. I like that. And I like Ms. Joke, she funny.

"Now they're sending in kids." Yeah, but GROWN FUCKING ADULT HEROES ARE FUCKING QUITTING. THOSE KIDS ARE YOUR BEST BET, ASSHOLE.

I'm okay, I'm fine.

I get that you want to defend yourselves, but allow the heroes that are still around to help.

That's right, Shindo, tell them.

"... sticking their noses in our lives?" Uh, if Shindo and Nakagame are there to take you to their school...

I can't stand the citizens sometimes because oh, you were worshipping heroes before but now that they're quitting you want to give the heroes who are still around a hard time? They ain't perfect but damn.

"If we could take them by force..." May be extreme, but you gotta protect folks and if they're giving you a hard time... return the fafor. I'm joking.

Ah, shit, it's that muscly fuck!!! I HATE HIM!!! SO MUCH!!!

"You two, let's have fun!" SIR, THOSE ARE KIDS, DAMN!!!

WHEN DID SHINDO INVEST IN SWORDS?!

Did he just push her?!

SOMEONE KILL THAT BITCH!!

WHY RUN BACK TO THE WINDOW?!

12000 layers? Sir, that is disgusting.

"Sometimes, we have to sacrifice our lives!" SHINDO! 😭

"I'll turn your brain into a milkshake!" PLEASE DO!! I HATE HIM!!

Ew

LET'S GOOOOO!!!

I'm glad, as a purple lover, that Smokescreen is purple!!! 💜

"It's you, isn't it?" You're gonna wish it wasn't Deku, bitch.

Dingy looking ass rabbit... looking like a cryptid... I adore him.

"I'm just a human, too." You are???

Why would he put that rock there?

"Fight me will all you have, Midoriya!" Alright then, you asked for it. Don't cry now, don't cry.

"I can't see his face through the smoke." You won't be able to anyways, Tatami. He's wearing a mask.

EN!!! Wait... you're the purple one?! YES!!

En is also very pretty to me.

Ooooh, he's still being all calculating and stuff in a fight. My green boy!!!

Real quick, I love how Midoriya's mask makes his eyes look like All Might's. Especially since All Might's eyes like that are a reflection of him being a shell of what he used to be in his prime. Current Midoriya is well... a shell of himself. He's pushing himself and neglecting how others feel just as All Might did.

"I want a life without regret." Bitch, you ain't Miruko.

BEAT HIS ASS, DEKU!!! DON'T ASK HIM NO QUESTIONS!!!

I'm not fighting anyone who looks at me like this and just standing there. That is a person ready to snap your kneecaps.

I LOVE MY GREEN BOY!!!

But damn it, this arc just makes me sad...

Fucking wow...

FINALLY ALL MIGHT GOT ONE!!

Oh, it's those other hero kids!!!

"We don't want him to die." OH DO YOU?!

Deku passing by the glass just like All Might... THE DAMN PARALLELS!!!

You think Smokescreen smells like lavender? I hope so.

All Might got drip, huh? Them glasses!!

He still has that ringtone?! 😆

I need Izuku to get a bath and a blanket like today.

INKOOOOOO!!!!

I forget how buff Midoriya is sometimes... his face just hides that, okay?

"Please be more cautious." We can only hope...

All Might standing there like "... ah, crap, here we go again..."

Pretty shot of Izuku. He gets his looks from his mom. She is a damn pretty woman.

I'll be honest, out of all the families, the Midoriya's is my favorite. They have had the most tender moments and I swear I shed tears with them.

Ooh, the baby Izuku flashback playing with Inkoooo... 😭😭😭💚💚💚

"Don't worry. I'll come home." 😭😭😭😭😭

NOT ALL MIGHT CRYING, STOOOP!!! 😭😭😭😭😭

DOES HISASHI CRY, TOO?!

Why in the absolute hell is Best Jeanist holding that phone like that?

"The way he holds that phone is so cool." Hawks, stop lying.

I am impressed though.

Ooooh, Gran Torino giving him the cape...

Ooooh, getting more of the 2nd & 3rd Users next episode? 👀 Lady Nagant??

[rabbitindisguise]

Went out in public public for the first time with crutches. Folks were right- the pity thing is really annoying. I don't think it would be as annoying if that wasn't already a PTSD trigger, but I was still annoyed nonetheless. Let's hope I Never need to use those guys again. I'm going to tape the hell out of my ankles to avoid it

But besides that therapy went great and my therapist was like "you need a routine and need to stop not talking to people" and I mean she's right so -_- guess what I'm doing next week. Also getting started on my disability write ups for my next doctor where I summarize my care/current treatment goals, and a write up for my next therapist on my mental health goals. Plus backing up my phone, fixing my laptop, Talking To People, etc

We mainly talked about identifying triggers and signs my symptoms were getting worse and I made the suggestion that I should check in on that every week to give myself a goal to shoot towards. Now that I don't have the SSI stuff hanging over my head I need to make plans for me for what I want to do. I think I want to be at a place where I can run (or co-run) a craft munch, or maybe publish a fic or something. Something that really challenges my social anxiety in a productive way to get me to see that Not All Things Scary. Maybe I could manage it if I turn off comments or something idk

In the meantime:

Clean my room

Work on laptop

Back up phone

Back up discord

Call insurance

Uhhhh and hmm not sure what else. Probably nudge online friends more. I've been watching a lot of anime recently and it's been helping my depressive episode along real well so I should probably put a cap on that (besides JJK) for awhile. Firm bedtime of midnight and wake time of 9-10 a.m. and medications by 2 p.m. etc

Also ugh it's going to be so sad when I leave my current therapist. I kinda want to ask for more appointments but I don't need them I'll just be bummed out. She was really helpful and got me out of an emotional pit and was supportive during all the crap things and good things, which is a more acutely therapeutic relationship than I typically have because when I was assigned to her I was a huge mess in every way. She even politely said I made a lot of progress and had a long way to go lmao she makes the truth sound so complimentary (genuinely very helpful though)

I'm glad that when I had misgivings I stuck it out and was honest and took her suggestions seriously even if it took a lot of humility to manage that