#I'm done with working on 'new projects to challenge myself and grow my skills' let me be comfortable instead

[alectoperdita]

all I ask is for one day, one day where work doesn't leave me feeling subhuman and completely drained of motivation/creative drive/will to live

[maebelleoftheparty]

Top Skills I Look for When Hiring an Online Filipino Specialist (OFS)

Online Filipino Specialist, Virtual Assistant, Remote Team Assistant... whatever you call them, if you’re already thinking about hiring one, you're making a smart move. An OFS (that's what I prefer calling them because they're more than just a virtual assistant, and I'm only hiring Filipinos 😉) can bring so much to your business—from improving efficiency to giving you the freedom to focus on big-picture tasks. But the key to getting the most out of your remote hire lies in finding someone with the right skills. 

After working with several OFS over the years, I’ve learned a thing or two about what to look for when hiring remote talent. So here’s my personal guide on the top skills I always prioritize.

1. Strong Communication Skills

Like I always say—communication is everything. When you're working with someone remotely, it’s critical that they can communicate clearly and effectively. Whether it’s through email, messaging platforms, or video calls, being able to express their ideas and understand your needs is essential. I always look for someone who’s comfortable with regular updates (not necessarily daily meetings, even a quick "daily tasks recap" would suffice) and asks questions when they need clarification. Great communication helps avoid misunderstandings and keeps projects on track.

2. Proactivity and Initiative

One of the denominators I’ve noticed with my best OFS hires is their ability to take initiative. You want someone who doesn’t just wait around for instructions but actively looks for ways to contribute. I love it when an OFS spots an issue or improvement opportunity and brings it to my attention before I even realize it myself. This kind of proactive attitude is worth its weight in gold because it saves time and shows that they’re invested in the success of your business.

3. Time Management and Organization

When you’re hiring remote talent, you won’t always be able to “check-in” as you would with an in-house employee. That’s why time management and organizational skills are a must. A great OFS should be able to prioritize tasks, meet deadlines, and keep everything in order without constant supervision. I like to ask about how they manage their workday or what tools they use to stay organized—these can be clear indicators of their ability to handle workloads efficiently.

4. Technical Proficiency

Depending on the specific role you’re hiring for, you’ll need to ensure that your OFS has the right technical skills to get the job done. Whether it’s social media management, graphic design, or customer support, make sure they have hands-on experience with the platforms, software, or tools you use. I usually check their portfolio or ask them to complete a small test project to see their skills in action. It’s one thing to say you’re an expert in Canva or Facebook Ads Manager; it’s another to demonstrate it.

5. Adaptability

The digital landscape changes fast, and your OFS should be able to keep up. I look for someone who’s open to learning new skills and technologies because you never know when your business might need to pivot or scale. A great OFS is flexible, willing to take on new challenges, and eager to grow with your business. During interviews, I often ask about how they’ve adapted to changes in past roles or how they stay updated on industry trends.

6. Problem-Solving Abilities

Let’s face it—problems will arise, especially when working remotely. A good OFS should be able to think critically and solve issues independently, whether it’s a tech glitch, a client query, or figuring out how to juggle multiple projects. When I’m hiring, I usually present a hypothetical problem and ask how they would approach it. This gives me insight into their thought process and how they handle challenges on the job.

7. Cultural Fit and Work Ethic

Skills are important, but they aren’t everything. You want to hire someone who fits well with your company’s culture and shares your values. For me, this means finding someone with a strong work ethic, who’s reliable and committed to the role. Since I’m often working with OFS long-term, I also look for someone who aligns with my team’s energy and communication style. I like to have a candid conversation about work expectations and goals to ensure that we’re on the same page.

8. Attention to Detail

Attention to detail is often the difference between an OK hire and a great one. You don’t want to waste time fixing small mistakes or following up on missed instructions. I always look for OFS who show that they’ve thoroughly read my job post and follow instructions well. If someone can spot the small stuff from the get-go, they’re likely to be a more dependable hire in the long run.

What's on your hiring checklist? 

Finding the right Online Filipino Specialist for your business doesn’t have to be hard. If you don't have a concrete list of skills yet, start with mine—communication, initiative, time management, technical proficiency, adaptability, problem-solving, cultural fit, and attention to detail— and you’ll be well on your way to building a strong, reliable remote team. 

Remember, the success of your hiring a great OFS largely depends on how well you set expectations and match their skills to your needs. So take the time to hire smartly! But if you don't have the time, you can leave the recruiting to the experts.

[owlcafe]

I've had something of the equal and opposite experience - at some point, I don't quite recall when, I became convinced I was simply the worst person alive. Cruel, selfish, talentless, just rotten all the way to middle (I assume this development was at least partially related to growing up autistic and queer at a Christian boarding school). And so masking became my lifeline. I had to be perfect, the model anything at all times. I had to have good grades, be good at sports, be artistic, be sensitive and caring but not too much lest it be seen as feminine and weak. I had to be strong-willed and independent but also not stubborn. I had to be the most hardworking, but also everything had to seem natural and effortless. I had to be cultured but not pretentious. I needed to be undeniable, someone that everyone wanted in their corner because I was too valuable not to have around. Out of fear that, if the mask slipped for even a moment, everyone would learn all the horrible things I knew about myself and inevitably come to despise me as I so richly deserved.

The first part of the process for me, oddly, was cutting away the roots. Before I had any kind of breakdown, I somehow managed to begin the process of convincing myself I wasn't the devil incarnate (although, even 9 or 10 years later, I would struggle to say the process is done). But then deconstructing the mask and all the dangerous habits I'd developed was much harder for me, and is a process I'm really only starting now. There were benefits to being perfect - being hard-working translated to taking on heavy workloads at a job where I was paid by the hour, so that made me more money. Good grades got me a PhD, a career in a field that I really like and enjoy. The need to be both athletic and artistic led me to dance, something I love dearly (and, as an interesting aside, the cultivation of both a healthy body through exercise and a healthy spirit through artistic expression, despite being things I initially cultivated specifically to mask better, proved to be essential in both changing my perception of myself and in the early stages of my unmasking process). Being able to modify my performance of myself on the fly to possess the "perfect" blend of any arbitrarily selected traits is a pretty useful skill to grease the wheels in any situation, whether it's making friends or banging someone off Grindr. It's been really hard letting go of some of these things, aspects of myself I consciously constructed to protect my innermost self from being recognised, because they still became parts of me. Even when they were demonstrably unhelpful (turns out working 90 hour weeks to fend off the lazy allegations is bad for you, who knew!), it was hard on multiple levels. It was hard to accept the risk that letting down this wall meant letting people closer to the real me. It was hard to turn down real, material benefits and privileges that come from sublimating yourself to the logic of your surroundings, from playing the game according to the stated rules. It was hard to accept that this fragment of myself that I'd clung to actually wasn't actually serving me, and I might have to let it go. I'm still figuring it out - I've taken a pretty significant career break and found myself in a new job that has orders of magnitude less work in than I'm accustomed to, and that's been hard. I'm doing everything I've been asked and more, but it still feels like laziness, and in part being scheduled to do so little work in the first place almost feels like rejection. I know this is illogical and wrong, I even specifically sought out this position for the lighter workload, but actually having it presented to me is a bigger challenge than I anticipated.

I'm trying to approach my ongoing unmasking project with a sense of compassion I'm not accustomed to using on myself. As much as my state of mind has improved, and I'm no longer afraid of being seen as imperfect in the way I was as a teen, that doesn't mean I'm suddenly thrilled about having and admitting to about an average person's worth of flaws. I never developed the skillset of letting people in, so in spite of it all I'm still not very good at opening up to people and being honest. And I'm trying to respect the difficulty of slowly disconstructing my psyche and finding out that pieces I made foundational to my sense of self are actually really damaging, and parts of myself I tried to cut away are valuable. That's not to say it's all bad though - one thing I did learn through my masking days was how to be kind, or at least much kinder than I was before. I learned to listen and empathise with people in a way I never could before, and just because I learned those skills in pursuit of an unhealthy and cynical goal, it doesn't make them less valuable to me now or less useful in the contexts I want to use them in now. Again, there's an odd irony there - the skills I developed specifically to mask in an aggressively conservative religious environment became the key to my modern sense of politics and moving away from the toxic lessons of my childhood, because it turns out there's lots of people that deserve compassion more than Brenda who's having a tough week because her usual brunch place is closed for renovations.

I don't really think I have a button for this one, I'm just kinda rambling, but to me unmasking has been both a terrifying and liberating process, as you describe. There are definitely ways in which I've felt like I've backslid - like I'm not as confident or as driven as I used to be - but it's important to me to remember that my scale for backsliding here is poorly calibrated. I feel like I've lost motivation because I have - it's just that's actually a good thing, because for years I was motivated in a really toxic way by a crushing sense of fear and self-loathing that I'd mostly imagined. Becoming less motivated has been scary, at times even depressing. It feels like I'm losing my edge, like I don't love things the way I used to. But it's been necessary to bringing my perceptions back in line with reality. I still love things, in fact I love them more than I ever used to, just now I can also love my bed and lazy mornings with a cup of tea, I can love my job but also leave that love at the office when I clock out at the time I agreed to, instead of 4 or 5 hours late. I guess my message is just to be open to the idea that even things you regard as your most positive traits - your confidence, your work ethic, your outgoingness - may not be serving you. Unmasking is liberating because we free ourselves from expectations that it was never feasible to meet, but it's also terrifying because even parts of ourselves that we love can be subject to renovation in the pursuit of authentic self-expression.

Does this unmasking business ever get easier?

Before learning I'm autistic I was extremely confident. Probably too confident, looking back. I took for granted that people liked me and just kind of assumed I'd be accepted most places I went and didn't think twice about it. I've since come to realize that I actually have some major social skills deficits, and I've been remembering past social interactions as well as some relationships that blew up for reasons I couldn't understand and it's mortifying to realize how much information I was misinterpreting. Times I thought people liked me when they were just tolerating me, times I thought I was being admired when I was actually being made fun of, stuff like that. Now that I'm conscious of those gaps in my awareness, I'm thinking about them constantly and second guessing myself all the time. I feel like it's made my social skills even shittier, and I've actually become more awkward. Is there a way out of this? I wish I could rewind knowing this about myself sometimes.

Anon you have inspired me to write an essay on the stages of accepting an Autistic identity. Because what you are describing is a very typical part of a process that normally takes years.

This piece will likely be my Sept 15th Substack drop.

If anyone wants to share their experiences with how the Autistic self-acceptance and unmasking processes moved in stages over time, comment, reblog, or send an ask!

[thangngo]

Seven learnings after seven weeks in a new job

Starting a new job can be an exciting yet nerve wracking experience. This was especially true for me because I was at the last one for seven years. Looking back on my first seven weeks, some things have gone well, and I could have handled some situations better. As a new employee, I've learnt seven valuable lessons.

We're people first. Taking the time to get to know my team members. I share (and sometimes, unfortunately overshare) my personal life. I feel it gives context to me, my values and what's important to me. Knowing team members helps me better understand and empathise with them. Broaden it beyond your immediate team to colleagues in other divisions to build your understanding network across the company. I've already established brains trust network that have helped me with amazing advice and support.

Clear communication and setting expectiations. Have open and honest conversations with your manager and team members about goals and responsibilities. It helps to keep you on track, understand priorities and make sure you're meeting their expectations. Looking back, I could have been more proactive in seeking out feedback on my performance and addressing any issues that may have arisen.

Be proactive and positive. With a clean sheet and clear head, I've identified projects which have been strategically important to the division. I put my hand up to do it. No surprise, my manager has been very supportive. Take the initiatve and you'll gain new skills and show your employer that you're eager to contribute to the success of the team and organisation.

Patience is a virtue. I have learnt the importance of patience and understanding that learning takes time. I sometimes charge ahead. In hindsight, as a newbie, it's always better to first understand my role, my colleagues and the company's priorities and processes.

New job, new organised you. An empty email inbox is a amazing sight. A new job is your best chance to keep it that way. Creating work folders in Outlook and to do, follow up and reference folders helps keeps emails sorted and my inbox to a minimum (there's 5 emails my inbox at the moment, the joy!). When I'm super busy, I only check emails twice a day to minimise disruptions.

Be kind to yourself. I have learned the importance of taking care of my physical and mental health and, to acknowledge I'm not perfect, but that I'm trying to be better. I try to take short breaks when I need to, eat well, and exercise regularly. I also make sure to take time for myself to relax and unwind after work. I could be a lot better on the exercise and eating better bit.

Reflection leads to betterment. Starting a new job is the perfect environment for self reflection and growth. Updating my seven-year old resume, writing the application letter, preparing for the interview - they are all opportunities to understand yourself. Through that process I've identified areas of improvement. One of them is listening skills. I've read books on it and given myself daily tasks to keep that learning top-of-mind. I've shared the learnings with my my brains trust network and asked them to help me apply those learnings.

Like everything in life, you could see something as a problem or an opportunity for personal and professional growth. Like that Wham song, let's Choose Life!

The key learning for me is to keep an open mind and be positive and willing to learn and grow, while also recognising areas where I could have done better. And doing something about it.

Starting a new job can be challenging, I found that approaching it with a positive attitude have helped me enjoy the journey and to look forward to what lies ahead.

Please share. I'm listening...

How does that compare with your experience? If you've recently started a new job, I'd love to hear your thoughts.

[jjrtuniport]

Skills Audit - 14/12/2021

As a game designer, you will have many skills. As a person, you also have many skills. These could be things like:

Drawing Programming Writing Balancing Systems Level Design 3D Modelling

And many more that might align with your own personal interests (history, fantasy, obscure knowledge of TV series gags from the early 2000s...). With that in mind, in your dev diary, do a Skills Audit post, outlining and describing some of your skills. Try to give yourselves a rating on your competency. It can be with specific software, or more high-level concepts. An example could be:

Drawing - 2/10

I have never been good at drawing or just art academically in general. I never spend time doing it in my free time either as it is not something that I enjoy doing, if anything it's more stressful as I can't get the image in my head to at all resemble the painting or image I just created.

3D Modelling - 4/10

Sort of paired with the art criticism though slightly different. I had never touched any 3D Modelling software until like 2020-2021 before I started my games course in college. As there was no enforced group projects (due to covid) I tended to work by myself. This meant I had almost full control of the direction I took the game and decided instead of making detailed assets using MAYA, if anything I could just create a rudimentary asset to use and instead focus on atmosphere or whatever was my passion for that particular game.

Coding - Blueprints - 3.5/10

As my first introduction to coding was during my college course in 2020-2021-2022 kind of timeframe, I haven't had a lot of experience doing it, let alone it actually working. Most of my knowledge is in Unreal's Blueprints as this is where I did all my project at the time in. Even then, I still required much assistance to achieve what I wanted to achieve. This is chalked up to 2 things, the first being my knowledge is minimal and the second being I had ambitious ideas for the skill I was at. For example, For the final project, I wanted to create a climbing mechanic, researched other games climbing mechanics like Uncharted all the way to Grow Home. I only realised how most games do climbing mechanics was to have everything climbable at a set height and this basically made it very modular as you could extend the building or whatever and the animation of climbing would always be succinct. My method was to have

I am still not confident in Blueprints but in C++ and other more tactile code, I have no worthwhile experience in it.

Problem Solving - 7/10

In life I am a good problem solver, I can come up with either a work around instantly or get us going in the correct direction to get the desired outcome. With game however, as I lack a real knowledge of anything in depth enough. For example, I think it would prove a more difficult challenge to solve someone's coding issue in an in-depth coding way than I can give rudimentary different ways of doing it.

Leadership

What I've learned so far

mediation

communication - having different dialogue with the different leaders

The skillset required to a a leader are communication, medication, negation and the social element of being a leader is something I find inherently difficult with Social Communication Disorder. I gave up the leader role because of this.

Time Management

Time

Communications

Put an idea across

Direct people for the project

Talking with others in the group - how ? any meeting ? Tried to get meeting with other but not direct enough?

3D Modelling: 2/5 Problem Solving: 4/5 Using Unreal Blueprints: 2/5

 I'm new to Unreal Blueprints but I'm really enjoying it

Using the Adobe CC Suite: 4/5 Coding in C#: 5/5 Emotional Storytelling: 4/5

Make this as creative as you want, and provide explanations for each skills you list (I've done a few above). We'll examine this at the end of the year to see how far you've come, ad to add new skills to the list!

[ratsoh-writes]

Never asked for a matchup before but let's give it a shot!

I think that I have a integrity/kindness soul, a sincere one. I never lie not even out of embarrassment, I have no shame babey! Add a sprinkle of madness and you have a Chaotic Good personality, always good mood, calm most of the time but always ready to be silly (call me crazy, it's a compliment 》;] ), up to dish back what's coming, no fear, not shy and not above violence when needed :] Can get along with anybody but still am an introvert, need a lot of time recharging alone, since interacting with people exhausts me a lot.

Strength would be that others can always depend on me, I myself am pretty independent and a quick learner to keep it that way.

Current biggest weakness would be that I still can't let myself trust others, so I don't let anybody get too close, which is hard on others to refrain from wanting to with my outgoing and open personality. So when they get too close i push/run away... I'm working on that...

Pet peeves: people that do their job half assed, arrogant people without the skills to back it up, too nice people (they are suspicious)

Weird habits: ...my butt wiggles when I eat something really tasty? Can't really think of any ^^'

Hobbies: Cooking! Always trying new recipes :) Haven't done drawing in too long of a time to call it a current hobby... My job actually!! I really love the work i do! I'm an engineer, sometimes acting as project leader. I love how challenging it is and the trust i get with the responsibilities!

A no no would be someone that is clingy/too dependent on me. I want a partner i can grow with and face challenges together, not another responsibility. But i also want time to concentrate on my own things, so I don't want someone asking for attention non stop. I would prefer if they were the same, so someone with no ambition/without something that demands their own time wouldn't work. If there's a communication gap between us because one or both of us is busy, that's perfectly fine! I trust them and won't start doubting the relationship :)

I hope I did it right! I'm so excited for the results X ]

Literally I only had one skeleguy in mind when I read this!! I match you with JUPITER (outertale papyrus)

Honestly it sounds like you guys are perfect for each other. Jupiter is playful, ambitious and very independent.

If Jupiter was a human, his soul would be justice. He has a very strong moral code and never leaves it. As long as the chaos doesn’t break the code, then he’ll be more than happy to go along with any shenanigans you come up with!

He’s also good for a SO that struggles to open up. Despite the strong personality, Jupiter is actually really patient with people. He has experience with codes off characters due to his brother Pluto. Plus Jupiter is all about communication ina relationship but he’d never push you to talk

Jupiter works as a fireman, so his job can be really demanding and he’ll need a partner to respect the fact that he can’t always be there. It sounds like you both have the same opinion on that

Dating Jupiter includes:

Hikes! Not the simple nature walks. I’m talking backpacks and tents with a dash of wilderness survival. Jupiter is all about living on the edge. Well maybe two days on the edge. He doesn’t get that any vacations

If you’re down, he’d love to do volunteer work with you, like cleaning up the ghettos or fixing sheds/homes. Jupiter is the happiest when he’s busy and helping others

Suprise fruit baskets or sweets sent to your work. For times when you guys can’t meet, he likes to send a small gift. Just a little reminder that he’s still there and is thinking of you

Jupiter is also a card game enthusiast. He’s gonna crush you in exploding kittens lol

[novastarry]

5.28.22

Evening Entry

Done List

- Start 1 new challenge

- Add tasks

- Add daily tasks

- Implement/Remove a new habit ( Start daily tarot pulls)

- Language lessons ( Spanish)

- Meditated

- Meditated

- Meditated on my inherent talents

- Deep breathing

- Watched TikToks

- Made agenda

- Morning entry

- Playtime

- Water first thing in the morning

- Checked in with kids

- Took a couple minutes to breathe and be present

- Got dressed

- Brushed my hair

- Left the house

- Listened to music

- Got breakfast

- Picked up my clothes from my grandparents

- Helped my grandparents

- Came home

- Changed

- Took a break

- Finished two bottles of water

- 4 minute meditation

- Snack 1

- Took morning meds

- Researched magick for today

- Did my magick for today

- Set intentions

- Laughed today

- Started believing in myself

- Found ways to use my inherent talents

- Picked up and placed thirty things

- Listened to a podcast

- Surrendered to my higher power

- Wrote down three things I wanted to get done today

- Wrote down some things I wanted to get done this year

- Prompt ' What do you need less of in your life? '

- Prompt ' What do you need more of in your life? '

- Research ways to know myself

- Researched ways to heal

- Researched ways to grow

- Do morning stretches

- Researched ways to develop

- Complimented myself

- Identified what roles I'm playing

- Listed my passions

- Identified what I value most about myself

- Went outside

- Decided whether or not to take test ( I won't be retaking it)

- Prayed

- Brushed teeth

- Used a writing prompt

- Made reading goals

- Prompt ' If you could have any three things what would they be? '

- Listened to a podcast ( Box of Thoughts)

- Meditated

- Think about how things are gonna get better

- Wrote a positive quote and put it in my wallet

- Cleaned glasses

- Wrote down positive bedtime affirmations

- Counted ten blessings

- Got dinner

- Got clothes basket out of car

- Researched ways to love myself

- Took a bath

- Took evening meds

- Took them an hour before bed

- Had third snack

- Journaled

- Let yourself scroll

Happy Moments

- While I was writing down all my manifestations I just started smiling at them

- Just watching the gabbie show and thinking about my future

- When I was just sitting writing down tasks and sort of thinking of how I would do them

General Notes

- My inherent talents all lie within the creative and weirdly people skills

- Balance has been a huge struggle for me lately

Stats

Ways To Improve

- Keeping water and something salty with me when I do leave the house

- Take meds early in the day

- Eating more salt ( And finding more sources of salt)

- Be realistic with myself

- Consistently meet myself where I actually am

- Consider a caffeine break

- Move a lot more

- Slowly work your way up to leaving like that

- Cleanse yourself

- Clean your room deeply

- Clean yourself

- Find your community

- Find a way to protect yourself

- Research Protection Magick

- Pick a new bath

- Start new projects and business ventures

- Symbolize your own rebirth someway

Things I'm Proud Of

- Going out on my own ( Even though it was too much too soon)

- Taking my meds

- When something went wrong instead of wanting to off myself I was like, well I'll just change my number and move to a different city

- Hitting my three week self harm free milestone

- Drinking three bottles of water

Signs From The Universe

5:55 - Very big change is coming

Turkey Buzzards - Cleansing, adaptability, patience, loyalty, innovation, community, protection, death and rebirth, renewal, tolerance, and protection

Yellow Butterfly- Spiritual renewal, transformation, change, hope, and life

Horses - Courage, integrity, perseverance, and power

11:11 - Your manifesting your intentions, stay positive

12:22 - You should step outside your comfort zone, pick a new path, and start new projects as well as ventures you've been planning to pursue

12:23 - A secret code from your angels to remind and encourage you to use your inherent talents and abilities

1:11 - Your manifesting your intentions, stay positive

2:22 - Stop worrying, balance yourself

5:43 - It explains the idea of something that's going to happen soon in your life, and your guardian angels are sensing a positive outcome

Beetle - Rebirth, renewal, the sun, and life

Bee - Symbolize industry, to bring messages from the divine, to set an example, to be associated with the soul, and to bring a blessing of fertility

Worm - Fertility, autonomy, and also a choice

- Starting to feel better and more motivated after I surrendered myself and did my manifesting

Fireflies - Best of luck, surprising guests, or looming relationships or gatherings

[mangosirene]

Hey Nina. This is kinda a depressing question, but my prompto cosplay is not going how I want and I have to wear it in two days to my school. But I'm really questioning that because 1. it just looks funky and 2. I don't want people making fun of me. Though it is only the 3rd cosplay I've made, I'm losing my confidence in all of my cosplay plans for the future. I'm a perfectionist and I compare myself to others so much. Since you seem like a really helpful & nice person, how do I deal with this?

First off: I’m very sorry for likely replying after the fact. It’s extremely difficult for me to keep up with my inbox on this site (especially for messages that need a lengthier answer like this), so I don’t always get to respond to inquiries with a quick turn-around. I hope your event at school ended up going well, though!

Secondly: I’m so proud of you for tackling a project outside of your comfort zone to push your skills! It’s important for artists to do that; it’s what helps us grow and learn and most of all, improve. The worst thing you can do as an artist is never push yourself or try new things. It’ll make you stagnate and cause your progress to plateau. So good job for attempting such a difficult costume so early in your cosplay journey!

Thirdly: Yes, Prompto is an extremely challenging costume. It involves a ton of little techniques and details that aren’t apparent at a first glance, and as a result, it’s a project that can get easily overwhelming. (Trust me: been there, done that!) So it’s no wonder you’re feeling frustrated, especially as a novice cosplayer! In which case, my recommendation from here on out would be that the next time you feel frustrated with your progress, take a step back. Evaluate what you don’t like and assess what you need to change in order to be happier with the final results. Don’t like the plaid you chose? Rip it off and find something else. Not happy with the paint job on the shirt? Start over. Take your time and use a different method. Unhappy with your wig styling? Wash out all the hair product and try again. There is no shame in remaking something two, three, four, or more times. Keep remaking it until you’re happy with it, even if it takes 10+ attempts. You will have so much more fun wearing something you’re proud of rather than something you just “settled” for or finished half-heartedly. (Also, on the note of budgeting: budget for this. Set money aside as a “back-up” fund in case things go wrong and you need more materials. That money should always be included in your original estimations! And if you end up not needing it? Cool, treat yourself in the Artist Alley.)

Lastly, and perhaps the most importantly: be more forgiving and let yourself make mistakes. You’re still learning. You’re still teaching yourself these skills. You have just started making costumes. Yaya’s first costumes were not perfect. Kamui’s first armor build was not flawless. Jessica started out with a Pikachu bikini and now she’s making stuff like this. Heck, look, here’s my first real cosplay that I made versus my most recent:

It’s taken me ten years to get this far. Why? Because for a lot of those years, I didn’t push myself. I stayed in my comfort zone. I chose projects that didn’t teach me new skills or force me to work with new materials. It wasn’t until the last 4 years that I’ve really been focused on my craftsmanship and improving my skills, and that is what has allowed me to finish costumes like Sheik, Rapidash, and yes, Prompto too.

I know it’s hard. I know it’s frustrating. But you’re doing the right thing by attempting more difficult projects. Just remember that the frustration is part of the learning process. It’s good to get frustrated because it means you care and want to push yourself harder. It’s good to have high standards for your work because it means you’ll always strive to do your best.

However: it’s important to not let this frustration stunt your growth. Acknowledge your frustration, accept it, and learn to manage it. Take breaks while working. Don’t be afraid to revisit the drawing board. Set the costume aside and practice the skills you need to finish it before making another attempt. And again: forgive yourself for making mistakes. Yaya, Kamui, and Jess make them all the time. And you can bet your patootie I do, too. (Anyone who’s watched my livestreams knows that I mess up quite a bit, haha!)

Whether or not you ended up wearing it to school, I hope your Prompto cosplay turns out in a way that makes you happy! Don’t give up; work smarter, not harder. You’ve got this!

[anime-matchmaker-blog]

Hello, can I request a male match-up for Haikyuu!!, Free and Attack on Titan please? I'm an INFP-T, Libra; and I'm 4'11 with black hair and brown eyes. I also wear glasses because I'm practically half-blind without them. I'm observant, independent and people often come to me for advice and think I'm reliable. On the flip side I'm also very cynical, stubborn, a bit prideful and selective of whom I call friends. Once I open up I'm a huge dork who loves witticisms and dumb jokes though [1/2]

I like time to myself to process my thoughts, and I really hate manipulative and dishonest people. And bugs. I’m also a huge procrastinator when it comes to my studies but know when to get things done. My hobbies are listening to music (mainly rock, metal and J-pop), taking walks, sketching and gaming, in which I get very competitive and my murder face gets slapped on whenever I game. I’m also a caffeine addict. Thank you guys so much and keep up the good work! Love you guys!! ^^ [2/2] 

Awhee, thanks for the love, anon!

Your matches are…:

Ennoshita Chikara (Haikyuu!!): You don’t really notice Ennoshita because of how average he is (poor guy). He’s quiet, isn’t much of a talker, and doesn’t seem to connect with the others in the class. When you interact with him, it’s usually unintentional - brief exchanges at the bus stop, run-ins in the hallway, or when you line up behind him at the school store. During one of these instances, you ask him if he started on the project due at the end of the week. He’s embarrassed to admit he hasn’t started and you admit the same thing. He invites out to work on it together but you decline, preferring to remain independent. From then on, even though you aren’t close to him, you talk to him more.

Despite his tendency to procrastinate, his grades are perfect. He’s at the top of the class, although he’s often overlooked. He catches you studying in the library sometimes and the two of you would sit and occasionally help one another - you ask him more than he asks you. He catches sight of small things, like the album art on your phone when you’re listening to music, the coffee shop brand you often buy from, and buttons on your bag that announce your video game biases. You also notice things about him - the movie making programs on his laptop, the volleyball equipment tucked away in his bag, and the folders filled with preliminary scripts and posters for his movie projects. You ask about it after spending a few weeks with him and he’s more than happy to show you his passion projects. You offer to sketch posters for him when you notice his artistic skills are lacking. From here on, the two of you begin to spend more time together.

In your down time, you and Ennoshita are out roaming the city. He observes others in search for new ideas and you help by pointing out different things he otherwise would skip over. These walks are made entertaining by your jokes and his deadpan responses. You also recommend him a ton of music to spruce up his boring playlist - he takes them with a grain of salt but eventually, he starts asking you to give him song recommendations for his movie shorts. He also plays video games with you but he’s terrible at them and he secretly practices whenever possible. He’ll never forget the time when he finally beats you.

Both of you are aware of the moment the friendship turns into something more than a simple relationship. He’s the one who confesses first as this is something he cannot procrastinate over because if he loses the moment, it would never come back. You don’t hesitate to return his feelings as you’ve noticed the signs of the friendship becoming more. He’s grateful you feel the same way and he’s especially glad you’re able to love an average guy like him.

MatsuokaRin (Free): Though not as friendly as he used to be when he wasyounger, chances of Rin having interacted with you before are low. It’s onlywhen Rin gets stumped on a problem that he can’t think of a solution to and Gouhappens to overhear him that he gets introduced to you. He’d be skeptic atfirst but goes along with Gou to meet you and begrudgingly tells you what he’sstuck on/having problems with. He’d take what advice you give him with a grainof salt but after it proves to be effective, he’ll be a bit impressed andsurprised, though he’ll try not to let it show on his face. He’ll thank you forthe advice in a gruff manner before repeating the thanks in a more sincerevoice due to Gou’s scolding. Through this experience, every time Rin happens torun into you, he’ll either wave at you or greet you with a simple ‘hey’. Thoughsince you’re one of Gou’s friends, chances of him seeing you around often arerather high. It surprises Rin when he hears you laughing and making dumb jokeswith Gou since normally when he sees you around, you look more serious. Thismakes him want to talk to you a bit more to see this other side of you.

There will likely be moments of awkward silence betweenthe two of you at first since making casual conversation isn’t one of Rin’sstrong points. When he does manage to strike up a conversation with you, youliking to take some time to process your thoughts and answers will likely makehim think you’d rather not talk to him given the silence that occurs before youreply. If the two of you happen to be chilling at Gou’s house, Rin might makethe suggestion of playing some video games to kill time. Your competitivenessthat surfaces definitely catches him off guard but Rin isn’t one for losingeither and can be quite competitive himself so the battle between the two ofyou in the game will certainly be an entertaining one. Your murder face won’tfrighten him or make him back down from the challenge either and in fact, he’llmost likely accept your challenge with a smirk, showing off his pointy teeth.This almost feels like a bonding moment for the two of you since after this,Rin is a lot more relax and casual around you. If he has time off from schooland swim practice, he’ll ask you if you’re free to hang, though “hanging”mostly means playing video games together.

Rin will likely catch a glimpse of your stubborn andindependent side the more he hangs out with you. Your stubbornness will lead tothe two of you to butt heads every once in a while and though it might be ingood fun sometimes, it might also lead to some arguments down the road. Rin isn’texactly dishonest but he isn’t a blunt and straightforward person either so hemight deny his wrongdoings at first. Your observant nature will likely clue youin on this side of him but if you point it out to him, he’ll likely deny thattoo, until some time later when he’s gotten a chance to cool off. Rin will bereluctant to apologize at first and do so in a roundabout way but his intentionsare there. Hopefully he can still call you a friend. If or when you open up toRin and call him a friend, he’ll be surprised, but in a good way, and you canexpect him to tease you a bit. He’ll be really happy though and it’ll show onhis face in the form of grins. He’ll laugh at your dumb jokes and jokealongside you.

Sometimes Rin will find it amusing to steal your glassesto get you to chase him to get them back. You look cute with your glasses and sometimeshe just wants to see you without them. He’ll be sure to give them back to youof course, after some time. The fact that you’re shorter than Rin also adds toyour cuteness factor and he’ll tease you about your height from time to time,even using you as an arm rest sometimes. Rin will try to remind you to stopprocrastinating on your studies, sometimes bordering on nagging you, but yourability to know when to focus is rather impressive. He might ask you for somemusic recommendations given how you like listening to a few differentgenres  and he’ll be interested in seeingsome of your sketches sometime. Accompanying you for walks will certainly beone of Rin’s favourite things to do. While it might not be a sport, it’s stillgood exercise and being able to be with you is definitely a plus.

Eren Jaeger (Shingeki no Kyojin): Eren is one of those guys you tend to stay away from because of his boisterous nature and tendency to do things on his own. He can be immature at times but he’s capable of growing up fast and that’s when his shift in personality kicks in. He’s often with Mikasa and Armin, so it seems obvious he’d turn to them if he ever needs any help. Instead, he approaches you, asking you to help him with something. When asked why he doesn’t ask his own friends, he merely shrugs and doesn’t elaborate. You’re tempted to turn him down but you can’t deny the sincerity in his voice. You take him on, because why not?

He’s mellowed out, you can tell, but he’s still fiercely defensive of other people he’s familiar with. In the off chance you get picked on for your terrible vision, he’s quick to defend you and drive off your bullies, making sure they wouldn’t come around to try again. He’s awkward around you but he does try to get to know you better. You remain guarded and answer his questions as politely as possible. It takes a long time for either of you to be comfortable with one another, but when you do feel relaxed around him, you’re first to crack a joke. So long it isn’t personal, Eren jokes right back and the tension between you two begins to dissipate.

Like you, Eren is also competitive in everything unless he’s bad at it. You two are always fighting for control in co-op or first in competitions. He’s honest and doesn’t like sugarcoating his words so you always know what he’s thinking. He loves taking you to his favorite places as well as discovering new locations exclusive for just the two of you. He’s also great at motivating you to get work done because he doesn’t like procrastinating in anything - if the moment’s gone, then you might not get it back. You often recommend him music to listen to and he takes every recommendation to heart.

He isn’t very intimate so the signs of his love for you are very subtle and slow-going. He often has to have things spelled out for him but since he’s honest, he doesn’t hesitate to confess his feelings for you when prompted. It’s a long but steady courtship, yet every moment is worth it.