#I'm crying with laughter holy shit | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

bunny-jpeg · 5 months ago

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thinking about older brother’s best friend!max who takes little innocent virgin you home after you got too drunk at a party. you trust him so much and he’s sooo dreamy but you can’t figure out how you ended up in his lap with his fingers up your miniskirt, other hand locked around your neck and skimpy lace thong stuffed in your mouth. but you don’t want to annoy him when he’s finally paying attention to you, so you furiously nod and drool when he tells you to be his good girl, his stupid little slut, and bullies his big, aching cock into your pussy. it’s soo wet and sticky but it doesn’t matter cause maxie promised he was wearing a condom…right? Right?

thank you so much for sending this to me! this is a crazy ass prompt and i love it. thank you so much! and for the people at home, send me your shit! i love insane prompts to write! give them to me, i need to write! i went with the tried and trued method of a leclerc!reader so add a little extra zest to it. i changed a few things around so i hope that's okay, all the pieces are still there just a few tweaks!! i hope you enjoy <3

max verstappen

cw: smut/pwp, leclerc!reader, drunk sex, dubious consent, lying, unprotected sex, size difference/kink, crybaby!reader, dark-ish fic, missionary position, fingering, (slight) choking, (technical) virgin!reader, filth(!!!)

"thank you so much for doing this. i told her not to go out tonight because i was out of town and couldn't get her if she needed help. you're a big help, mate. i owe you." charles' voice was clear on the other end of the phone.

max was grabbing his keys, "you owe me nothing, charles. i'm happy to help. wasn't up to much else tonight." he got his shoes on and headed out the door, "i'll let you know when i get her." then hung up the phone.

he got in his car and drove to the club you were supposed to be. max had known you for about as long as he had known charles, you were the curious little thing that liked being around your brother. you were close in age, but max hadn't seen you in years.

charles said that university had prevented you from ever really hanging around as much as you used to. which was a shame because max always thought you were cute, even if you were a little bit a cry baby.

he pulled up to the address of where you were supposed to be and got out of the car. it was late into the evening and there were a few people outside. the sight of him turned a few heads and some whispers. but he had to pick you out of the crowd.

he leaned against the car and did the tried and true method of finding a leclerc. he cupped his hands around his mouth and said, "hey! leclerc!"

and then as it had worked a million times with charles over the years, your voice rang out, "holy shit, max! what are you doing here?" and you got out of the crowd in front of the club.

that was when max's heart stopped.

he remembered you in your high school uniform and baggy t-shirts with various bands on them. he remembered when you had braces and that bad haircut in tenth year. but, now, are a twenty-something year old woman, you were beautiful.

you practically stumbled over to him, you tripped over the curb and against his chest. but you clung to the front of his t-shirt, "oh my god, it's you!" you howled laughter, "where's charlie?"

max steadied you back on your feet and looked over you to see the other people who were murmuring. he looked down at you, his hands still on your shoulders, "i'm going to take you back to my place tonight." even though charles said to bring you back to his place, there would be a slight detour.

plus, what if something happened? max needed to protect you, or at least he had self appointed himself with the role.

"god, i haven't seen you in like what, five years? still got those chubby cheeks though." you giggled drunkenly as you pinched at his face.

max could feel the heat rise in his face, didn't help that your plump breasts were pressed against him and he got a good view of your cleavage. he said to you, "c'mon, let's get out of here." he gave you a smile, "i think we're turning too many heads."

you nodded innocently before max helped you into the car. even going as far as to buckle to you in and closing the door. as he rounded the car he exhaled deeply, this was not what he was expecting.

you looked at him and giggled, "holy shit, it's actually you. why are you picking me up? i called charlie?"

max sighed and buckled himself in, he patted your knee, "how much have you had to drink? your brother is out of the country for most of the summer break."

a few seconds ticked by before you made an 'o' shape with your mouth, you snapped your fingers and pointed to max, "i was supposed to call lorenzo!"

max's eyebrows knitted together, "how much have you had to drink?"

you shrugged, "i don't know. there was this nice guy who kept buying me drinks and he was like super nice. but then, my friends kinda got me away from him and told me to call my brother and i said, 'which one?', because you know. i have three brothers and i don't very well want arthur to see me THIS drunk so i called charles... but i wasn't supposed to call charles, i was supposed to call lorenzo."

max wanted to kiss you really badly at that moment. and when he squeezed your thigh for reassurance, you moaned. then max's brain went silent for a moment.

you looked at each other and you felt the heat rise in your cheeks as you said, "sorry.... over sensitive." you licked your lips, "you can still hold my thigh if you want."

this was going to be a long night, and max wanted to see how deep this could go. after all, you both had about five years to make up.

"i hate being this drunk." you whined, as you padded across his home. you were out of the skimpy dress you wore to the club, much to max's pleasure. you looked better in no bra, one of his t-shirts and his socks that you pulled as high as they could go, "i wish i could stop being drunk the moment i got home."

he was on the couch, a glass of water and some tylonel was on the table. he patted his thigh and suggested, "i think i know something that can help." his brain had been trying to think of a clever way to get you closer to him, but you were too easy.

"water and rest?" you asked as you got closer to him. your arms across your chest.

he leaned back into the sofa a little and said, "no. why don't you come here to find out?" he could tell in the slight wave of your stance that you were still quite drunk. he chuckled as he watched you come over to him, were all leclercs curious like cats?

you perched yourself on his thigh and he pulled you into his lap. being so close to you made his cock throb in his jeans. you yelped and admitted, "i'm a virgin!"

"what?"

you looked at him so innocently it almost broke the driver's brain in half. you had your hands up near your face and your bottom lip was wobbling, "i've... i've never had sex before. i mean... i technically let a guy finger me." you swallowed, not knowing why you were admitting this, "but.. but he didn't even make me cum, i lied to him and faked it."

max's hungry gaze remained on you, "so... so no one's actually... had sex with you."

you looked like you were going to cry. you were in your twenties and a virgin (he wasn't going to acknowledge the curl of jealousy in his gut at the thought of some loser at your school poorly trying to finger you). that had all the lights going off in max's brain.

leclerc's little sister was a virgin, drunk and on the verge of tears in max's condo. shivering like a leaf. max never thought of himself in terms of animals, but at moment he felt like a big scary lion. and you a poor little deer. the signature leclerc doe eyes only added to his point.

"it's alright." he said, "how about this, you let me finger you properly. i don't think your technical first time should've been spent with you faking an orgasm."

you had to admit, you had feelings for max. when you were younger and your brother would race him, you'd follow him around afterwards asking about max. it annoyed the hell out of your brother.

even the guy who fingered you was almost an exact fit to max, the blond-brown hair, blue eyes and a big nose. but it didn't quite cut it. max had been the subject of your fantasies for years now.

you blushed, "i mean... i don't want to force you or anything. i don't want it to be a pity fuck."

he laughed and curled a strong arm around you, "no, no, not you. to make you cum would be an honour." catch more flies with honey than vinegar. catch the pretty sister of a fellow driver with soft words.

he got your panties off with a little help and put them in your mouth. the sight of your mouth full of your lacy thong made all the blood in his body pool into his cock. he brushed your cheek and chuckled at your lack of resistance, "aw, does someone like to be roughed up? i bet you're just so used to everyone treating you like glass. the only daughter." he cupped your pussy with his wide hand, "how would charles feel about this? or lorenzo? they'd have my head." he kissed at your neck.

you whined, liquor swam in your head still as you squirmed a little, "don't talk about my brothers while you're fingering me." you tried to say around the panties in your mouth.

max grazed his fingers across your pussy, "alright, alright." his breath was hot in your ear as his other hand came and was placed around your throat. he shuddered a little, oh you were just a perfect fit weren't you?

now max really had to make sure that you weren't going to run off to your private university and fooled around with other boys.

maybe a baby would have to do.

he held you close to him by the throat and played with your pussy. soon he sank two digits into you and you whined around the panties in your mouth. you felt a hot flash go through you.

this was totally different, you felt the pleasure bloom in your gut as he roughly fingered you. you held onto his wrists, but remained pressed to him as he occasionally rubbed his clothed erection against your backside.

"oh, you're beautiful." he said softly, "you are so painfully beautiful. i'm surprised you haven't made yourself a whore at school. why? scared that your brothers would kill whoever touched their sister?" he kissed your cheek as he heard your whimper.

your body felt loose and your brain felt like it was working overtime. it was beyond adorable, the little cry baby with tears in her eyes. don't worry, max will make it all better.

"but you don't want anyone else, do you? you wanna be my good girl? you know so little about sex, poor thing. but don't worry, i'll make you a nice little whore for my cock." he pressed on your throat a little harder as he really started to work his fingers inside of you.

you didn't know what to think, everything around you felt oppressive but the liquor and lust short-wired your brain. you nodded and tried to speak around the fabric in your mouth, but it all came out like a jumbled mess.

max could feel the heat rise in his body, his cock grew more stiff. he liked the sight of this. you in his clothes, letting him explore your body. you were untouched territory. all for max's taking.

you wanted to cover your face from the embarrassment of being finger-fucked by your crush. but max squeezed your throat a little tighter.

"don't hide yourself from me, i want to see it all." he pressed a hard kiss onto your shoulder and watched your shudder. your pussy clenched around his fingers which only spurred him to keep bullying them into you.

you whined something around the panties in your mouth and max continued his kisses. you felt amazing on him. he hissed against your back as you hit your climax and whined loudly. you coated his entire hand in your wetness.

max moved you by your neck and kissed you on the cheek, he said, "good girl. see, orgasms aren't that hard." he let go of your throat and took the panties out of your mouth.

you were panting heavily as you said, "holy shit." your heart was hammering and you felt hot all over. you felt his arms around you waist and his mouth in your ear.

"we're not done yet." he said.

before you knew it, you were on max's bed. the shirt you had borrowed was on the floor and your bra was right next to it. when max took off your socks, you whined and he pressed all his weight on top of you. leaving one sock left on you.

he was naked on top of you, his cheeks were pink and he felt hot all over. you could see your eye bug out a little from the sight of his naked body. he pulled away soon after and grabbed you by the hips then rubbed his hard cock against your slick pussy.

"i wish your brother brought you to the track more." he chuckled as he continued to rub up against you, "you would've been so cute hanging around, you were always so curious. but, i don't know if i could contain myself if you were around often."

you blushed, "oh c'mon, stop it, max. you're going to kill me!"

max was over you, "i would never do that. i like you very much alive. you're perfect. i think it would be the best strategy your brother ever did if he had you around the paddock. i'd have to fight off every other driver to get to you."

you admitted, "i'd only want you, max."

max grinned, "is that why you're letting me take your virginity? giving yourself over to me? i bet a part of you wished i showed up, maybe that was all the plan for you." he pressed the tip of his cock up against your entrance, "someone has a crush." he was teasing, but the look on your face showed that he had you all figured out.

you squeaked, "i do! i'm sorry! i've had one for years!" you looked like you were going to cry again.

max almost came from the sight before him, he swallowed to keep himself together as he reached for your face with one hand and looked into your eyes, "you like me."

in your inebriated state you replied, "more like love you."

he chuckled, "really now? after all the times i beat your brother, you had all these feelings for me." he pressed his chest up against you, as he guided his cock into your slick slit.

you clutched onto his shoulders and tried not too tense up too much. this was a wet dream come true. you croaked, "i've always have."

"well, aren't i lucky." he said as he kissed you gently, "taking the virginity of the most beautiful woman i've ever seen." he was a snug fit in you but, he peppered your cheeks with kisses to help relax you. thankfully you were painfully wet.

he felt a curl of possession in his gut. like he needed to have you by his side. it wouldn't be hard to convince charles to let the two of you date, even if he was protective of you. he knew that max was a good man, he'd be a loving, caring boyfriend. maybe even an eventual husband.

he moved his hips slowly, not to push too much on you at once. you were still painfully drunk, all of these were admissions under intoxication. the consent of the situation was murky at best, but the way you looked at he pushed his cock into you excited him.

"do you want this?" he asked.

you nodded, your gaze unfocused, "of course. why, why would you ask that?" you really were so cute. your brain was polluted with liquor and pleasure, maybe he should've put you to bed before this all got out of hand.

but in all fairness, max was a little too far gone. he always held feelings for you, he was just better at covering them up. but, as he thrusted into you, your legs around his waist as he rutted against you. it was like the little flame from his youth came alive into an inferno.

oh, this was the woman he was meant to marry.

he kissed you once more, and picked up the pace. he held your sides, feeling your warmth against him as he felt the intense feelings bloom in your chest. call him an obsessive freak, but he should've known all those years ago.

stupid teen max, look what was right in front of him! you two could've been married by now. had a family and everything. but as he was balls deep inside of you, he believed everything happened for a reason.

you were now in his arms, under him as he moved against you. the blunt end of his cock, hit against the beginning of your cervix. a promise of what was to come. that you'd get nice and pregnant by him.

by the time he was finished with you, you were going to be at least five percent dutch if not more, you two had a whole week together. this was just the start. you two lazily made out.

the lust throbbed in your head as the liquor still coursed through your system. your mouth felt dry but you couldn't do much else but lie under him. his kisses were domineering and strong. his cock was buried up inside of you like it belonged there.

he believed that you two were two halves of a same whole. he wish he had gotten a glimpse of you sooner. seen how much you matured, he melted a little at the feeling of you. beyond perfect for him.

the pleasure was getting to your head, even in your intoxicated state. you clung to him like a life line as he moved against you. your sweet noises and that your eyes were barely open.

"beautiful." he said, "and all mine."

you swallowed, "you're wearing a condom, right?"

he staggered in his pace for a moment, but he gave you best media smile as he lied through his teeth, "of course, can't have any accidents." he kissed you once more. and you just melted into it so easily.

you then let out a sweet noise as you felt orgasm grip you. you panted heavily as the lust flooded your brain. you held onto him tightly as he continued to move against you. this all felt like a dream, and the noises you made as you came had max panting heavily.

"please."

"i need you." you said with tears in your eyes. the orgasm has torn through you and you were left a sputtering, hot mess under him.

he continued to rut against you, his pace was erratic as he moved against you. his heart raced at the sight of you. he was fully gone for you, he wanted you. tomorrow and the day after that and the day after that. he wanted his cock buried in your sweet pussy.

it was fine, obviously there was a connection. he just had to seal the deal, and with a few more strokes of his cock. he was putting all of his weight on top of him. he finished inside of you and you made a small pathetic noise.

"fuck." he groaned.

you whined, "please, max."

when he pulled away, he wasn't away long. he soon pulled you in for a searing hot kiss while he let his cock stay inside of you for a moment longer. to feel the closeness. you were a lucky girl, you were now max's newest obsession.

he licked the bead of sweat off your neck, his cock twitched inside of you. perfect.

he curled up beside you soon after, his grip on you was possessive at the least and obsessive at the most. he felt like a lion with prey between its jaws, not biting hard enough to kill it. but just to keep it still. you were a sweet little thing in his arms.

maybe it was smart for you not to be around the track as much because of school, because if max had gotten a glimpse of the little crybaby leclerc all grown up, you two would've already been married by now.

but don't worry, be a good girl and you'll have a pretty ring in your future. the thoughts pooled in max's gut and made his softening cock twitch a little.

before he could go another round with you, you were fast asleep next to him. your soft snoring could be felt in his chest. he may have had to a little lying and manipulating before, but he wasn't going to fuck that sweet cunt while you were asleep.

he wasn't a monster. but that didn't mean he got out of your sleepy grasp and grabbed his phone from his jeans pocket to take some photos. not to share of course, he doesn't share. they'll be for his personal collection when you eventually go limping back to your brother.

come morning you were wrapped up in max's arms. you woke up with a throbbing headache and the sun that came through the window made you want to die. when you tried to wiggle in his grasp, he held on tighter.

he kissed you on the back of the neck, "good morning."

the sound of his low voice was like a shock to your system as you woke up quicker. you looked over your shoulder at him and swallowed. last night was barely pieced together. but you were naked next to him under the covers with one of his cats scratching at the door demanding breakfast.

when you tried to pull away he only pulled you back to him. your back against his broad chest. he said, "you're not getting away that easily." he rested his head on your shoulder, his arms around you tightened.

"what happened last night?" you croaked.

"ah don't worry. just tell your brother your safe and sound. you can stay here until he gets back home." he rubbed his cock up against your behind, "a woman like you shouldn't be alone in a city like this. lots of bad men out there that could hurt you."

"but not you?" you felt something bloom in your chest. the familiar pang from your youth.

he kissed your jaw and said, "of course. i'll always keep you safe." as if his cum wasn't dried to your inner thigh. but don't worry, he'll freshen it up once that pesky headache of yours is gone. after all, your sweet older brother was gone for another week.

"you know." charles said sometime later, he was in max's drivers room picking at the food on the table, "i feel like i should kill you for fucking my sister."

max was seated across from him, one leg over the other. he smirked, "and what's stopping you?"

charles shrugged, "i don't have to hear her talk about you all the time. i mean, at least i can vouch for you. you are practically family, better than some random guy that she met at school." he looked at his fellow driver, "will not forgive you for getting her pregnant though. and outside of marriage too. you should've heard our mother when she told her." he rubbed his forehead.

max chuckled, "well that'll be dealt with after the season. it feels wrong scheduling it between races. she deserves a lovely wedding."

"good, good. and i better see my nephew! we live in the same city, you better not lock her away!" charles shook his finger at max.

max laughed, "don't worry don't worry. but i cannot promise that he race for monaco when he grows up." then winked at his fellow driver (and future brother in law).

in the end, max hobbled together a narrative of the night you spent together. which led to a week together, which led to you getting pregnant by him. no one could've suspected that he could ever hurt a hair on your head. he was too in love with you, almost to an obsessive degree. he took your virginity and now you were taking his last name. <3

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adventuringblind · 1 year ago

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He Must Be Lucky!

Max Verstappen x Reader

Genre: fluff and crack

Summary: Max gets wasted and can't remember that the reader is his wife. It's endearing how much he simps bith sober and drunk.

Warnings: Alcohol consumption, a wild party (at least for Max), Max being down bad

Notes: This one is for @amajixi! I hope you like it! Does anybody wanna send me asks and talk about drivers with me? Give me your most feral thoughts because I'm genuinely curious... please >_< (I even turned my anonymous asks back on please just send me things).

Side note: my fics haven't been getting much traction as they usually do. Is it something on my end? Have y'all disappeared on me? I know I shouldn't care, but y'all are the only ones that validate my writing T_T

Masterlist // Request Form // My Website // buy me a Ko-Fi

Max has a track record of partying hard. It's who he is, and she lives him for it. There isn't any kind of gripe of hang-up, just Max having fun and doing dumb shit that makes her laugh.

Lando is throwing a - well - a party. There was an excuse for it in the invitation, but she's too buzzed to remember it.

The echoing sound of Max's laughter ricochets off the walls. Daniel is with him, probably getting them into more trouble, but she knows Daniel will look after him. At least until he's trashed and can't get off the floor.

Alex brings her another shot glass. She has no idea what's in it, but Alex is letting loose, and she'll be damned if she doesn't partake.

He raises the shot glass in a toast. "To whatever this party is!" He cheers. They clink their glasses together and down the shots. She gags at whatever was in it.

"The fuck was that, Alex?!" She sputters.

He gives her a blank look. Really thinking hard about what he gave her. "I've got no idea."

The hours seem to tick by. The people are slowly dissipating, leaving the safety of this weird little bubble they've created.

She's lightly buzzed still, having danced off the majority of the shots Alex had her doing. The couch is her new best friend, and Lando had brought her a blanket at some point in the last twenty minutes.

A weight on the other end of the sofa catches her attention. Max, with complete adoration in his blue eyes, is staring at her. "Wow," he slurs. "You are the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen."

She laughs at his drunken thoughts. "You're not too bad looking yourself, babe."

The smile on his face is almost childish. It's big enough to almost fall off. His cheeks tinged a darker red with the blush adding to the alcohol flush.

"Go on a date with me? Please?" He tries to pout, but it ends up looking awkward mixed with the grin.

She flashes the ring at him. "Sorry, I'm spoken for." Alex and Lando are giggling from where they are watching this interaction unfold.

Max looks like a wounded puppy. Eye's glossing over like her might cry. "He must be such a lucky guy. You're just so perfect!"

"Awe, love, you wanna know a secret?" She leans in to whisper into Max's ear. "You married me."

If Max could hand you the world on a silver platter, he might have tried in this moment. The Dutch is vibrating in pure, unadulterated joy. Like a child who just got the ice-cream they were so desperately craving.

"Holy shit! I'm the lucky guy!"

Max smothers himself against your body. Eventually falling asleep, mumbling about how she's so amazing, and how he loves her so much. It's endearing to here his drunk affections laid bare for everyone to see.

It's the lullaby that calms her to a restful state. Fingers tangling with the softness of his hair. "You're not the only one who's lucky. I guess I'm pretty lucky, too."

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harrysfolklore · 1 year ago

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uncle harry

gif by @kiwikiwiandkiwi <3

im so soft rn, enjoy !

MASTERLIST | MY PATREON

The phone ringing in the middle of the night meant bad news most of the times.

However, when you and Harry were woken up by the sound of his ringtone, his mum on the other line frantically saying "It's time! The baby is coming!", you couldn't be happier.

Gemma broke the news that she was expecting a few months ago and Harry was man enough to admit that he cried a waterfall, not being able to contain his happiness over becoming an uncle.

And you were absolutely melted at the sight of him being excited about it, every single time he went out, he would come back with stuff for the baby, he face-timed his sister every night and overall he couldn't stop talking about being an uncle.

When Harry found out that he was going to have a niece, his excitement reached a whole new level. He started planning everything, from what he would teach her to the tattoo he would get for her once she was born, and once again, it made your heart burst to see your boyfriend so excited.

So now you headed to the hospital, ready to meet the brand new addition to the Styles family.

"I'm so excited," Harry said as he drove through the streets of London, holding your hand, "I can'y believe Gemma is a mummy now, feels like just yesterday we were pulling each other's hair and arguing over the last piece of cheesecake."

You smiled at him, kissing his knuckles softly and placing your intertwined hands on your thigh, "Feels like just yesterday I met her for the first time at your show, I was so nervous!"

"You really were, lovie," he smiled at the memory, "And you ended up becoming inseparable."

"What can I say? She's the cooler Styles."

Harry gave you a side eye and then laughed along with you, the rest of the drive was quiet and soon enough you were pulling up to the hospital where a few family members already stopped by to meet the little bundle of joy.

"Are you ready to meet your niece?" you turned to look at him as you unbuckled your seat belt, noticing that he had small tears in his eyes, "H? Baby are you crying?" you grabbed his chin and couldn't help but smile tenderly when he looked at you with watery eyes, "Oh my gosh, you're too adorable."

"I just, I can't believe I'm about to meet my sister's baby, that's insane."

You kissed his lips shortly, grabbing his face with both of your hands when you pulled away.

"She's already so lucky to have the best uncle in the world," you pecked his lips again, "Now let's go, I'm eager to meet her too."

You and Harry entered the hospital, hand in hand, ready to meet the newest member of the Styles family. As you approached Gemma's room, you could hear the sounds of laughter and joy coming from inside.

When you walked in, you were greeted by a room full of close family members, the room was pretty spacious and had a spare area where visitors could hang around without disturbing Gemma and the baby. Anne immediately approached both of you, happiness radiating from her eyes.

"You made it!" she said as she hugged you, turning to Harry when you pulled away, "H, baby! I'm a grandmother!"

"And I'm an uncle! Holy shit!"

You melted at the interaction, over the years the Styles-Twist family had taken you as one of their own and you were happy to be present for important moments like this.

"How is Gem? Is she awake? Can we see the baby now?" Harry eagerly asked after hugging his mom.

"She is fine, doing amazing," Anne said proudly, "Michal is inside with her, let's go."

Anne guided you to the door that lead to Gemma's private room, Harry squeezed your hand and you walked next to him, excitement evident on his every step.

Anne opened the door, peeking her head inside, "Your brother is here."

You and Harry walked in, Gemma was lying on the bed looking tired but happy nevertheless, a tiny head peeking from the blanket on her arms.

"About damn time, I was about to pick a different godfather for her if he didn't show up soon," Gemma sassed, making Harry turn his head back in laughter.

"Dammit, you're really a mum now," he approached his sister, you decided to stay back with Anne, "The bloke your brought to my concert years ago really was the one huh? Who would've thought."

"What can I say, mate? You trying to sabotage our date was kind of our blessing." Michal chimed in, standing next to Harry and patting his back.

"Congratulations, mate. I can't think of a better guy for my sister." Harry said as he hugged him, everyone looking at the scene tenderly.

"Are you going to stand there or are you going to hold your niece now?" Gemma wiggled his eyebrows at Harry, holding out her arms to him.

Harry took the baby into his arms, his face lighting up with pure joy. He cradled her gently, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "Hello, beautiful," he whispered, his voice filled with emotion. "I'm your Uncle Harry, and I already love you so much."

You felt your eyes get watery at the sight, Harry looked up at you and urged you to come closer to him and the baby.

"This is your auntie," he cooed to the baby again once you were standing next to him, "She's the coolest ever and makes the best pancakes, you're going to absolutely love her just like I do."

"She's gorgeous," you said as you looked at the baby's face, "Congratulations, Gem."

"Thank you," Gemma said softly, a tired smile on her face but her eyes shining with gratitude.

"Just so you know," Harry looked at Gemma with a serious face, "She's not allowed to have any boyfriends until she's like 30."

Michal laughed and agreed with Harry, you rolled your eyes at him and Gemma shook her head.

"Uncle overprotective, that's what you are," Gemma said, a yawn coming out of her mouth right after, "I can't even imagine how is it going to be when you have your own kid."

You felt butterflies in your stomach at this, Harry giving you a small smile and winking at you.

"Let me put a ring on her finger first please," he turned to look at Gemma, "Because unlike you, sister, I'm not having children out of wedlock."

"Come on, now!" Michal protested, making the entire room laugh.

Hours passed and Harry was glued to the baby, babbling nonsense to her and cooing at every little thing she did. Eventually Gemma drifted off to sleep and that was everyone's cue to leave and let both her and the baby rest.

"I'm so happy right now," Harry said as you drove back to your house, "I feel so happy for Gemma, and for our family."

"She's going to be the best mum ever," you looked away from the window to face him, "And you're going to be the best uncle."

"Thank you for being here with me today, for sharing this moment with me. I love you."

"I love you too," you replied, leaning in to kiss him softly. "I'm so happy for you, for all of us. Today was perfect."

"And I meant what I said back there, I'm not letting her have a boyfriend until she's 30."

"Whatever you say, uncle overprotective!"

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avocado-writing · 9 months ago

Note

Idk if you know Mortal Kombat, especially mileena (she's my favorite) but may I please get a Wolverine and/or Deadpool with a gf who has a mutation like Mileena.

She thinks she's ugly when she uses it but the boys think otherwise 🎀

(I'M LITERALLY IN HEAT EVERYTIME I THINK ABOUT THEM)

This is (my wife) Mileena

When Wade fights with you at his side, your carnage is always prefaced with a quiet request.

“Please don’t look.”

And, because he is fundamentally a good dude, he doesn’t.

Fuck. He really wants to, though.

The noises that you make when he turns his back to focus on a different opponent are… interesting. It sounds like a bunch of really wet celery being snapped in half to a symphony of screams. When he’s done slicing people into teeny tiny chunks he turns around and sees you standing there in a pool of blood, trying to get the stain of it off your jacket.

He’s never been so curious about something in his entire life.

You’re so lovely. Loveliest thing he’s ever met. How the fuck he managed to convince you to give him a chance he’ll never know. God, the stars, and luck must have all been on his side that day, when after you’d finished taking down a cartel he’d asked you to grab a coffee and you’d said yes. Ever since then it’s been great. He loves spending days on window-shopping dates with you, fingers intertwined as he leaves you breathless with laughter; lazing on his sofa with some stupid rom-com playing with a bucket of popcorn between you both; snuggled in his usual corner booth at his favourite pizza place playing footsie beneath the table.

Perfect. You are perfect in every way.

So if all it takes is looking away when you ask him to then it’s a pretty easy compromise.

Unfortunately what you don’t take into account is that he is an idiot.

Wade catches the sight of you in the reflection of his katana the next time you’re out on a job. He’s just liberated some dude’s head from the rest of his body and is cleaning his blade when he spots you.

And he cannot turn away.

Your mouth is open so wide it could rival a snake’s. Rows of jagged teeth which help you dismember the man who has been caught in the vine of your tongue, struggling to get away as he screams for help. When your jaws snap shut the man is silenced. You spit out the remains of his face onto the ground beside you like discarded gum.

“Holy shit!” says Wade. You squeak when you realise he’s caught the reflection of you, covering your mouth with both hands as it returns to its normal soft, kissable line.

“Oh no!” you whisper. Wade dispatches the last guy who’s running for him with a well-aimed bullet before coming to gather you in his arms.

“Baby, hey, it’s okay!” he says quickly when it’s obvious that you’re about to cry. You look up at him with glistening eyes.

“But Wade, I look so ugly,” you manage, “I thought… if you saw… you might not want to…”

Be with me any more, are the words which hang unspoken in the air. Wade guffaws.

“Are you fucking kidding me? Babe, that was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen!”

Your eyebrows crease together in confusion. He wants to use his thumb to smooth it out, but instead chooses to wipe a tear off your face.

“Yeah?”

“Of course! Shit, you’ve got that fuckin’ Venom thing going on? Like Mileena from Mortal Kombat but sexier? Come on, I’d be a fool if I wasn't rocking a semi right now!”

This makes you laugh properly, from your stomach, and all your worry is forgotten.

“I shouldn’t have worried…” you sigh when you get your wits back.

“Nah, of course not. You’ll always be my boo, okay?”

You grin up at him, before an idea very clearly crosses your mind.

“Oh! That means now I can show you what my tongue can do.”

He isn’t proud of it, but that promise almost makes him cum in the suit.

taglist: @falsewordz @malfoys-demigod @belilwen @mildly-salted @tvwebs @childeslegstrap @getmeoutofhell @s1eep-o @just-a-beatlemaniac69 @yrthr @momopad @sugarplumz100 @captainjinkx @madspads @acrosstheunivcrse @yeethaw13 @na-is-salty @florduarte @hunterispunk @starfleetteddybear

#marvel x reader #marvel imagine #marvel fanfiction #mcu fanfiction #mcu imagine #mcu fandom #Deadpool x reader #wade wilson x reader #my writing

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justhereforsubsevika · 4 months ago

Text

Part 2 to asshole sevika because one (1) person eluded to maybe wanting a part 2

Nsfw, smut, public, rough fingering, strap sex (referred to as dick and cock), choking, degradation, humiliation, asshole sevi is acc just awkward weird sevi, also this is now a university au do with that what you will

Okay look i cant have my baby be evil for too long ok </3 no tears or angst but like ITS NOT HER FAULTT SHE'S JUST A WEIRDO!!

Okay so you may have fucked up. You may or may not have told a friend, who may have told a friend, who may have told the whole campus that Sevika moans her own name when she cums. You may or may not have exaggerated and said that her shouting lasted for 3 minutes. You may or may not be watching as some evil cunt walks up to her while she sits alone at the picnic bench, snickering.

You can hear their conversation despite the fact you're a good distance away.

"Hey, Sevika right?" This scrawny guy who, quite frankly, Sevika could snap like a twig, starts to say. Her face lights up. She thinks she's about to make a friend, you can see it all over her face. Jesus Christ, you feel awful. It feels like someone is wringing all the blood out of your guts as you watch this scene unfold.

"Mhm! That's me!" She says, turning off her phone and gesturing beside her to request that he takes a seat. "Nah, I'm good." He starts laughing at her and her face drops in confusion. "What's funny?" She queries, standing so she looks down at him. He doesn't even step back despite the fact his entire body is now shrouded in her shadow. "Is it true you- HAH FUCK- you moan your own name? Y'know when you finish?" He splutters between maniacal laughter.

Her face goes white.

She looks to you with so much betrayal on her face. But she deserved it right? She fucked you raw and didnt even chuck a towel at you after. She made fun of your boyfriend (who you cheated on, but that's irrelevant) and your sexuality.

Oh shit.

She's walking straight to you.

Her face sure got its colour back quick.

"Hi Sev- AH-" Suddenly you're being tugged by your hair across the campus, screaming and flailing as she grunts and tells you to shut up. She doesn't even bother to go into a bathroom stall once you're inside the library building, just pins you against the bathroom tile with her forearm and shoves her fingers under your skirt. She pushes into you roughly, not caring that it hurts bad since there's no moisture to assist her. She wants to hurt you. You've pissed her off bad.

"WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU TELL PEOPLE THAT?" She shouts, roughly pounding into you. It's all so much, her fiery, furious expression, her rough fingers deep inside you so abruptly. But it's not fair! She fucks loads of girls, why the hell is she assuming you spread the rumour?

"H-how do you know it was me? Could be one of your s-sluts that you fuck-"

"BECAUSE I ONLY EVER DID THAT WITH YOU! BECAUSE YOU'RE MY FUCKING FRIEND AND I TRUSTED YOU!"

She looks for a second like she might cry, but instead grunts and bars her teeth, hand coming up to choke you. Even with her impenetrable anger, you can tell she's at least not trying to kill you. You give her the satisfaction of spluttering and heaving for air even though you can breathe perfectly fine and she moans. "You're such a fucking whore aren't you? Gave that pussy up to me despite your little boyfriend, now you're slutting yourself out for me? Anyone could walk in and see how you're dripping down your thighs. Pathetic little bitch."

She lets you go for a second to unbuckle her jeans and of course she's packing. Typical Sevika, always prepared for revenge sex.

She comes up behind you as you attempt to pull down your panties and grabs you up, her forearm able to restrain both your legs from under your knees.

Holy shit. You're now fully off the ground, watching in the bathroom mirror as Sevika slides her dark purple strap into your pussy. Her other hand is back round your neck, making your eyes roll back. She bobs you up and down on her cock in a way you're sure should be physically impossible, somehow still managing to ruin your pussy with her brutal pace. She starts thrusting up into you and you laugh thinking about how she must look from behind, rocking up and down on her toes.

"Fuck are you laughing at?" She sneers, squeezing a little at your neck. Your mouth drops open, silenced by Sevika's rough grip. Her hand drops to thumb at your clit and you can't help but cry out.

"Mm, oh shit sevi, mm fuck sevika," you groan and she smirks.

"Who's moaning my name now?"

And then Sevika sees the bat symbol and says "my city needs me" and flies into an aeroplane and dies (IM NOT WRITING THIS DUMB SHIT ANYMORE OKAY I DECIDED I HATE IT)

#dyke #sevika #arcane #butch #lesbian #sevika arcane #headcannons #sevika smut #sevika x you #asshole!sevika #dom!sevika #justhereforsmut

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bandgie · 1 year ago

Text

Who Dun It?

mystery!skzmember x fem!reader

part 1 | part 2 | part 3

warnings: MDNI 18+, dubious, finger fucking, intox implied, ruined orgasm, public fingering

780 words

It shouldn't feel good, but it does.

His chest is flushed against your back, making the room even hotter. You could blame the amount of people drunk and piling up, but it wouldn't be true. You like how his hands roam your body, how he gropes and squeezes your flesh.

He has big hands, that's one thing for sure. This unknown man can fill his hands with your breasts, pressing them against your chest and jiggling the fat. His fingers find your pebbled nipples underneath the thin material of your top.

Each tug makes you moan, each twist makes you throw your head back to his shoulder. You rub your legs together to get any sort of friction, but the man beats you to it.

His slender fingers make their way past your short skirt, under your panties to feel your sopping cunt.

"Wet already huh?" His voice is like velvet in your ears. "I barely even touched you." You can hear a smirk in his words. "Or maybe you like being touched by a stranger. Do you like it?"

You nod frantically, trying to swivel your hips so his fingers brush against your clit. "Yes," it's a breathy answer. "I like it."

He leans down to your ear, lips ghosting over the shell. "Then spread your legs for me."

So you do, as much as you can at least with the crowded room. You moan when his fingers slide against your slit, gathering and spreading your slick. When he reaches your clit, he rubs it in hard circles. The pressure makes you yelp, hips shying away instinctively at the rough touch.

His other hand steadies at your waist so you can't wiggle too much. He grips you a little tighter when he finally sinks one of his fingers in your warmth. The moan you let out is crude, but the college students surrounding you two hardly seem to care. Their lack of attention is an encouragement to rock your hips against him.

The man, who you think you might fall in love with tonight, pumps his digit in you at a steady pace. You swear you can hear the perverted sound your cunt makes even through the music, but it only spurs you more.

His palm slides over your exposed flesh while he finger fucks you, never letting you forget how easily you opened for him. "Gonna cum on my finger huh?" He groans in your ear. "Dirty girl, don't even know who I am."

You don't, and you don't care. "Faster. Ngh~ you're so good,"

He moans in your ear at that, opting to not only go faster but to add an extra finger. It feels as though just two of his digits are a cock in you, hitting you deep and stretching you wide. You want so desperately to turn around and see who's touching you, but you like the mystery. You like that twinging sense of the unknown as the stranger brings you closer to completion.

With your clit being slapped consistently and your cervix being prodded, you can feel your legs trembling from your soon orgasm. It makes you scramble to find purchase on the man's thighs, on the wrist that's disappeared under your skirt. He lets you reach back and tug on his hair.

His long hair, you note.

"Holy shit," you breathe. "I'm gonna cum. Cum, cum I'm gonna cum!"

He picks up his pace. He shoves his fingers so deep and fast you know everyone can hear it. Your toes curl, your eyes roll, your-

"COPS!" Someone shouts. "COPS!"

People around you begin to push one another, scrabbling to leave the apartment that's overly filled with smoke and spilled booze. They effectively shove the man away from you, tearing his fingers from your heat that makes you cry out in such desperation.

More people hit your shoulders, some scream with laughter while running.

You turn your head around, hopeful to find the man in eyesight. But all you see are the back of heads, then your friend's face amidst the chaos making her way to you.

"We need to leave. Now."

She yanks you by the wrist, not commenting on the arousal dripping down your thighs or how your skirt is drenched in the front.

Never in life have you been more frustrated, more distraught. Being dragged away while all you can remember is how well he finger fucked you, how beautiful his fingers looked and felt. His voice, his breath on your skin. And never in your life have you been filled with such determination. You'll find this man. Have him finish what he started.

With new vigor, you head home.

a/n: can you guess who the mystery man is?? and im thinking about making a part 2 but I wanna see how this performs first lmao.

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archangeldyke-all · 2 months ago

Note

Hi Angel!! I first wanted to say that I love all your Sevika stories, they never fail to make my days better!

So, I've recently been thinking about little fucker and the twins a lot ((bc I found out I'm gonna be an aunt for twins :DD and it made me wonder how did Sev and Reader react to the news, like.. "what. WERE HAVING TWINS??? HOW." something like this lmao.

Not sure if you've already written something like this, but I've practically read all of your masterlists lmao. If you did feel free to skip cuz I have really bad short term memory ;))

oh my god that's so exciting!!! congrats auntie!!! i think i wrote a few little sentences about this in one of the first twins posts, but lets make it a full fledged story heheeh <3

(also as always with these stories, don't think too much about how the pregnancy happened. reader is trans, or has a magical strap, or it's just yuri magic. you choose hehe)

men and minors dni

for the first few days after sevika's pregnancy test coming back positive, you're both living in denial.

"how am i pregnant? i thought this was menopause! i thought i was done with all this shit!" sevika whines.

you giggle a little hysterically, then pull her into your arms. "i have no fuckin' idea." you say, blinking in shock. "holy shit. i actually knocked you up."

sevika giggles just as crazily in your hold. "congrats."

"i've been trying to get revenge on you for little fucker since you first knocked me up with her!" you laugh. sevika snorts and smacks your shoulder.

"don't say revenge. oh fuck, this is gonna miserable, isn't it?" sevika whines. you kiss her sweetly.

"it's the most amazing thing that's ever happened!"

"you're such a shit. you're just happy it isn't you this time around."

"damn right i am!" you laugh. sevika smiles at you, and then her face falls. you coo and wrap her up in another hug. "it's gonna be alright sevi-bear. i'm gonna be with you every step of the way."

"no, it's not that." sevika whimpers as she nuzzles against your shoulder. "i'm just-- i'm so happy. we're gonna have another one, baby, holy shit."

you grin and pull sevika in for a kiss.

her reaction isn't quite as happy when you get to your doctor's office, though.

"o-oh!" the ultrasound tech gasps.

"good 'oh?'" sevika worries, sitting up a bit from her spot on the paper covered exam table.

"you're having twins, mommies! congratulations!" the tech gasps, grinning up at you and sevika.

you blink.

the tech giggles with glee and turns back to her monitor, clearly handling the news better than you are. you blink again, then look down at sevika.

she's glaring at you like she's going to murder you.

it's only now that the tech's words hit you. and for some reason, you burst into laughter.

"t-twins?!" you cackle. "like, two of 'em?! how-- how the hell did we do that!?" you ask.

the tech blinks up at you in surprise, opens her mouth to speak, but you don't hear her answer. you're too busy grinning down at your wife.

"i'm gonna kill you." sevika finally whispers. you burst into another round of laughs.

"alright. just wait 'til after the pregnancy, think you might want me around these next few months, mama." you tease.

sevika's glare is deadly, but you can't find it in you to stop laughing. holy shit. two more little babies running around your house. if they're anything like their sister, they'll look exactly like sevika. tears well up in your eyes as you gaze lovingly down at your angry wife, imagining two pairs of grumpy baby eyes glaring up at you while you try to change their diapers.

"are you crying?!" sevika squawks. "why the hell are you crying, i should be the one crying!"

"you can cry too, baby!" you giggle, a surge of love taking over your body. before you know what's happening, you're smacking the tech's hand away from your wife's belly and straddling her waist, peppering her face with an endless barrage of kisses. "oh, holy shit, baby, we're gettin' two more of 'em!"

sevika's glare lessens a bit, a small smile ticking up at the corner of her mouth. you can see her softening to the idea; two more babies for you to love; but before a full smile can take over her face she forces herself back into a frown. "we can barely afford the kid we've got." she huffs.

you snort. "that's the beauty of hand-me-downs, sev. plus, silco gave you a big raise when we had the little fucker, what makes you think he'll hold back now that it's your turn?"

"we live in a two bedroom home!"

"we can move!"

"while i'm pregnant with twins?!"

"i'll start looking for a new place the second we get home."

sevika finally smiles, rolling her eyes and giggles a bit. "i can't believe you." she whispers. you grin.

"you're the love of my fucking life. i can't believe you."

the door clicks shut, and you both look up from your embrace to find that the tech has snuck out to give you some privacy.

and, finally, sevika bursts into laughter along with you.

taglist!!

@sevikas-baby @ghostscandys @sevikasllver @runawaybaby3 @lesbones

@chezze-its @lez-zuha @vikashoneybee @shanesevikasfuckdoll @imheadintothemountains

@nanajustnana-a @helaenabugmom

taglist!

@fyeahnix @lavendersgirl @half-of-a-gay @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner

@kissyslut @chuucanchuucan @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther

@lavenderbabu @emiliabby @sevikasbeloved @hellorai @my-taintedheart

@glass-apothecary @macaroni676 @artinvain @k3n-dyll @sevsdollette

@ellieslob @xayn-xd @keikuahh @maneskinwh0re @raphaellearp

@iamastar @sevikitty @mascdom @nhaaauyen @annesunshiner

@mirconreadzztuff22 @veoomvroom @lushh-s3vik4s @katyawooga @lesbodietcoke

@strawberrykidneystone @vkumi @fict1onallyobsessed @dvrkhcld @sweetybuzz25

@sluttysierraaa @snake-in-a-flower-crown @ruiwonderz @littlemisszaunite @biblicalcrybaby

@blackgaladriel @nightlyconfusion @dancingqu33n17 @losernb @p1nkearth

#sevika #sevika arcane #sevika imagine #sevika x reader #sevika x you #soft sevika

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achromaticegoist · 9 months ago

Text

THE BOOK OF BILL TINY RANT (SPOILERS)

STOP. I CAN'T DO THIS TUMBLR. okay okay, I GOT IT DELIVERED LIKE 3 HOURS AGO AND I COMPLETELY FINISHED IT 😭😭😭🙏

I ACTUALLY CAN'T DO THIS ANYYYMOREEE. I SWEAR TO GOD I WAS GIGGLING, KICKING, SCREAMING MY HEAD OFF THE ENTIRE TIME READING THIS STUPID THING.

Did ALEX LIKE, *SCROLL* through FANDOM while making this entire thing BECAUSE WHY DID SO MANY PEOPLE LOWKEY EAT WITH THEIR OLD HEADCANONS? SUPPOSED TO BE THE DEATH OF ALL OUR HEADCANONS RIGHT??? EVERYONE PREDICTED AT LEADT SOMETHING LMFAOOOOO.

AND IF ANY OF YALL FOLLOW GRAVITY FALLS : AMBER SKIES BY JOZLYN MOON, THE POST WEIRDMAGGEDON SCAR THING BEING A PREDICTION IS FUCKING *CRAAAZY*

AND THE FACT THAT THEY KEPT COMPATING HIM TO THE DEVIL AND SHIT, LUCIFER REFERENCES AND "FALLEN ANGLE?" MY GUYYYYY the actual BALLS it takes to write this because I GASPED SO LOUDLY AT SO MUCH SHIT.

AND I WAS SUPER DAMN EXCITED ABOUT THE HENCHMANIACS ONE

GUYS THEYRE SO FUCKING STUPID 😭😭😭😭😭😭🙏 WHY ARE THEY ALL SO STUPID 😭😭😭😭 IM DYING OF LAUGHTER

SO MANY PEOPLE LOWKEY GOT SOME KIND OF BEEF WITH PYRONICA?? WHY ARE THEY SO INVOLVED WITH HER??? THEY HAVE A GROUPCHAT OH MY GOD THEYRE SO BESTIE CODED

Again I'm STILL FREAKING OUT ABOUT JHESELBRAUM THANK YOU VERY MUCH. I WILL SURVIVE ON THESE CRUMBS SO DAMN MUCH

TIME BABY IS A FUCKING COCOMELON ENJOYER 😭 HELPPPPPPPPP

GGGGGUYYYYS? WHAT? OH MY GOD?? WHAT THE FUCK?? IM SCREAMIGN. NO NONONO YOU CANT DO THIS TO ME THE ANGST.

AND NO. THE WAY BILL AND FORD HERE WERE FUCKKKK THATS SOME GOOD FUCKING TOXIC BILLFORD. DUDE NAH IM LIKE GASPING FOR AIR RIGHT NOW BECAUSE HOLY SHIT SOME OF THE STUFF HERE IS SICK BUT I CAN'T HELP BUT LIKE

AND THE

IM FREAKING

AAAA

FORD DESERVED SO MUCH BETTER THOSE PAGES MADE ME TEAR UP A LITTLE 😭😭😭🙏 NOOOOO

AND THOSE *SCRAPS* OF BILL'S BACKSTORY. GUYS CHAT NO I AM SCREAMING. SILLY STRAW CHILDHOOD TRAUMA LOWKEY WENT HARD AND HIS FAMILY AND THE *FUCKING SPECK OF HIS HOME DIMENSION*.

THAT ONE LITTLE TV SCREEN WITH THE EDWIN A ABBOT FLATLAND DIAGRAM IN THE BOOK THOUGH NAH CUZ FANDOM ATE WITH THAT ONE.

AA. AAAAAAAA. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AND WHAT THE FUCK 😭🙏🙏 DIPPERS HISTORY WAS SO FUNNY I COULDNT STOP LAUGHING BRO ALSO WENT THROUGH THE GREEN MNM STAGE

AND IM NOT EVEN GOING TO TALK ABOUT THE COLLEEN BALLINGER***** APOLOGY REFERENCE THAT SHIT WAS SO DAMN FUNNY.

ALSO THE ENDING??? WHAT THE--THERAPY? NO BRCUASE THIS IS ACTUALLY SOME MESSED UP THERAPY SHIT. That is NOT how you try and heal someone holy fucking hell. Guy is getting more and more broken

CHAT I AM SOBBING AND SHAKING AND CRYING AND READY TO IMMERSE MYSELF FULLY IN THE GRAVITY FALLS FANDOM RN, STILL VERY MUCH ACTIVE IN HAZBIN HOTEL BUT GOD MOTHERFUCKIN DAMMMMMMMMNNNN THIS IS SOMETHING TO UNPACK.

#gravity falls #the book of bill #rant post #fangirling #the book of bill spoilers #book of bill spoilers #spoilers #my screenshots #swearing #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #bill cipher

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todayisawthewhxlewxrld · 2 years ago

Text

"you act like you just saw a Ghost."

"all your games, all your lies"

synopsis// satoru gojo is horrible at pranks.

pairing// satoru gojo x gn! reader

word count// 1.3k

contents// the prank in question is playing dead, maybe borderline hurt/comfort?, angst maybe but regardless there's a happy ending?

notes// this is how im coping. gege is just punking us that's all. i also just thought this was such a stupid oneshot idea i love it i think im such a fucking comedian for this. but this is kinda (very) half-assed... anywho it was inspired by the song ghost by fefe dobson (dont play with me rn.)

"Satoru, I'm home!”

When you get no response, you find yourself gazing about your eerily empty home. You hum to yourself. Odd. Satoru usually greets you right at the door.

“Satoru?” You call out again, trying to ignore how your anxiety rises as you slowly enter your bedroom.

Red immediately floods your vision; it’s everywhere. It’s on the walls, it’s on the bedsheets, it’s on the floor—there’s practically no place left untouched by the liquid. You swallow harshly and make a point to not step into the liquid that seems a little too similar to blood for comfort, albeit the task is to no avail because it's everywhere.

“Sato-“

Your voice dies in your throat the minute you see him on the ground. Satoru is laying there lifeless, covered in blood. There's no rise or fall of his chest, only an empty, vacant stare in his glossed-over eyes. You freeze. For far longer than you should have.

This isn't real.

This can't be.

There's no way Satoru is laying here dead, in a puddle of his own blood. You inhale harshly, not even aware you were holding your breath in the first place, as you drop down to your knees and crawl the rest of your way toward him, oblivious to the fact that you're now coated in just as much blood as he is. The moment you're by his side, It all hits you at once. Holy shit, Satoru is laying here in a puddle of his fucking blood. You hesitantly shake him.

“Satoru?”

You wait a second to see if he’ll say anything or do anything—even a twitch of his fingers would suffice, but nothing.

"Satoru, please,” you say, desperation flooding your voice as you shake him harder.

When nothing happens again, you shake him once more, but this time you don't stop. You simply keep shaking him, hoping that if you shake him hard enough, he’ll do something to prove he’s still alive.

"Satoru, this isn't funny." Your breathing is labored as panic fully seeps into your veins. "Satoru, wake the fuck up!” You slap his face, only for his head to merely loll to the side.

And that was the last straw. Suddenly you're thrown into a sob so violent it racks your whole body, shaking as you can do nothing but rest your head on his chest and sob for him to wake up, to stop messing around because this isn't funny, to just please wake up, yet he doesn't. You don't notice how his chest is starting to contract; you're sobbing so hard that you think it's just you who’s making him move, when suddenly a loud choke of laughter rings in your ears. You sit up immediately, still ugly-crying as you look down at Satoru, who is currently finding something absolutely hilarious.

Oh, you’ve lost it.

You’ve actually lost it; here you are hallucinating that your dead boyfriend is laughing.

Satoru wipes imaginary tears from his eyes. “Oh my god,” he says between laughs, “you should’ve seen your face!”

You blink at him, tears still freely flowing, as you lean back down and place your head against his chest.

“Whatcha doing?”

“Shut the fuck up.”

Satoru goes stiff but does as he’s told, and when you can hear his heart beating rhythmically, thumping perfectly fine as all hearts should, you grow cold, like maybe you’re the one who was actually dead a few seconds ago. You sit back up.

“Gonna tell me what you were doing now or-“

His sentence is interrupted by you abruptly standing up and screeching in a fit of anger, or maybe more so, betrayal, “You fucking asshole!”

Satoru, clearly taken aback, scrambles to stand up along with you, holding his hands out in front of him placatingly. "Woah, woah, babe, calm down-"

“Calm down?” You snap, staring at him with an animosity he’s never seen from you before. "Don't tell me to calm down when I thought you were just fucking dead!”

He sheepishly glances down at the fake blood-covered floor. “It was just a prank..."

“Fuck you!” And you snap, thrown head first into another sobbing fit, wrapping your arms around yourself in a pitiful attempt to comfort yourself while you babble incoherently: "I don't—I can't."

Satoru’s heart breaks right inside his chest, and he doesn’t think he’s ever regretted anything more than his stupid idotic antics right now. He can't bear to see you like this; this might actually kill him. He can't take it. He can't take knowing that he’s the entire reason you're in this state in the first place. He takes a step closer, opening his arms up to hug you, and you flinch away from him the moment you notice.

"Don't touch me, Satoru.”

Satoru frowns, ignoring the tears stinging his eyes and the burning sensation of rejection that encompasses him whole. He thinks—no, he knows—that whatever he could say right now wouldn't help, but maybe giving you some space will, so he steps back and clears his throat. "I'm gonna go shower.”

You sniffle and turn away from him, brusquely waving him off. “Do whatever you want."

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

Satoru walks out of the bathroom with one towel in hand, drying his hair, and finds you sitting on the edge of the bed. He can’t help but notice the new sheets laid out and how the room is squeaky clean, quickly realizing you were left with the unfortunate task of cleaning up the last remaining remnants of his prank as he showered. You finally notice him in the doorway, but you hardly even spare him a glance.

“Are you still mad at me?” he asks as he makes his way toward you, tossing the towel on the floor before taking a seat next to you.

“You’re an asshole.”

"I know, I'm sorry,” he mumbles as he subtly scoots in closer toward you, and when you don’t bother moving away, he draws you into his arms, your back to his chest as he places his head on your shoulder. "I just wanted to play a prank on you.”

You stay stiff, refusing the innate need to melt into him. “You’re horrible at pranks.”

He buries his face in the crook of your neck and mumbles, "I know that now.”

You hum curtly, ignoring the shivers down your spine—though your resolve is very quickly turning nonexistent, you’ve never been anything but putty in his hands.

Satoru places chaste kisses against your neck, murmuring, “How long are you gonna torture me for?”

“Till you've thought about your actions.”

He pulls away from you and twists your body around so that you’re face-to-face. “I have! I thought about them the whole time in the shower.” He leans in and nudges his nose with yours, whispering, "I'm sorry.”

You stare at him blankly for a moment before sighing, your entire body sagging in relief as you finally give in to your desires and close the distance between you two. Satoru, overjoyed with the fact you’re kissing him, can’t help but return the favor with vigor. Each kiss is followed by him mumbling, "I'm sorry," and it goes on for god knows how long—though you don’t really care, you just care that he is alive, that he is kissing you, that he is here, and it was just a very poor, poor prank that hopefully he’ll never do again—no, a prank you’ll make sure he never does again. You take back the initiative and kiss him deeply, taking his bottom lip between your teeth that has a whine escaping Satoru’s mouth before it transforms into a full-on wince of pain from you biting him.

He pulls away abruptly, his fingers darting up to cradle his bottom lip. “Ow! What the hell was that for?”

You stare up at him innocently, even going as far as tilting your head to the side like you’ve done nothing wrong at all—though your facade is quickly shattered when you lean back in and Satoru instinctively leans back, but you grab him by the back of his neck, forcing his head in place harshly, whispering through a menacing smile, “If you ever pull something like that again, Satoru Gojo, I will personally make sure that you die by my hands.”

“…Noted.”

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juelzsstuff · 7 months ago

Text

Telling armin about your crush (spoiler it's him)

!sfw! idk how to write i didn't pass english class dont come at me.

you two were best friends since childhood and you've always had a crush on him even a little more than a crush and the two of you never spared any details when it came to your lives. you often hungout with jean, connie and sasha and mostly went on missions with their group. you two were talking around a camp fire to catch up after everyone had gone off to sleep, too deep in conversation to head to bed.

————————————————————

"imagine if the captain saw us up still, he'd probably make us dig each others grave" you say laughing quietly. "yeah i know but hey at least we wouldn't be dying along as a titan snack" he smiled back at the thought of you two being buried next to each other with matching headstones. A memory sparks in your mind, "omg i forgot to tell you", you turn toward him ready to spill your latest gossip, something you two did regularly. "i went out to go do my cleaning in the mess hall and i saw the hottest man i have ever seen in my entire life and okay so my first thought was holy shit, my second was the realization that i looked like i just crawled out of a pile of horse shit and i was already staring at him and yk what this man did" you pause covering your face in embarrassment. armin has a huge smile on his face waiting to hear how badly you fumbled, "what did he do?" you slide your hands off your face and turn toward him putting a hand on his leg to brace yourself from what you are about to admit "he came up to me because i'm staring still and said 'are you okay, did you come from the infirmary?' and i just made a weird noise that was supposed to be words and walked off". armin starts laughing trying to hold back, "you need serious help, there's no coming back from that y/n", you respond half laughing half fake crying "I KNOW". the laughter dies down and armin speaks up "so what did he look like?" you try to think of what he looked like and draw a blank, only remember some key points, "he had like brown hair and was sort of tall definitely shorter than you.....i guess now that i think about it, i really didn't see his face so he was probably average looking. not really my type". armin chuckles and he asks, "so what is your type then".

you think for a moment, a pang of anxiety runs through you. you've always pushed down your feelings for him and just enjoyed your friendship but tonight you might as well get a little bold. you think for a moment and look up at the starry sky, "i like smart guys yk? like the ones who aren't just a feral idiot ready to pick a fight or so full of themselves that it's annoying and weird". "blondes are okay too, my favorite actually" you say while stealing a glance at him, he's looking down at the ground and not really paying attention. so you keep talking "i've had a crush on this one guy but either he's oblivious or he's not interested so i've given up and so ive gone for the opposite type". armin looks at you intrigued, "a crush? like a serious one or like i barley saw his face and i made a weird noise one?" he says holding back a smile, his perfect teeth flashing for only a second. you nudge his shoulder and roll your eyes, "like a serious one". "can i guess who it is?", a nervous zap runs through your body and all your confidence is running out the window. armin seems to notice and is now even more excited and confident in his conclusion. he speaks with pure certainty, "it's reiner isn't it?"

your face drops and all the anxiety you had before has become straight disappointment, the only thought in your mind: omg he's an idiot. how is the smartest man in the scouts really this oblivious, you might as well have said your crushes name started with a ar and ended with a min. well maybe he knew what you were trying to say and he's giving you an out. it's too late now, time to commit or dig that grave you two were talking about earlier. you sigh and look at him in his sky blue eyes, "do you seriously not know? i'm talking about you armin" he sits there eyes wide and a blush on his cheeks, "w-what? me?" "yes who else, seriously? don't say you actually thought i was into reiner" you say sheepishly. armins heart is beating fast, he never thought you would think of him that way in a million years and all of a sudden his dreams have come true. all the years he spent listening to you talk about boys and his attempt to shove down his feelings for you and try to fall for another girl no longer mattered. all the times he got excited when you came to talk to him and no one else, every time you accidentally brushed his hand and it went straight to his soul. it now means something more than before but now his brain has basically stopped working and he might as well be dreaming. you talk again as you watch his brain short circuit "i love you armin and i always have, more than just a friend". he doesn't look at you and looks up at the camp fire with a smile and says, " i love you more than you know y/k, everything about you is so perfect. i always told myself anything you need i would be there first before anyone or.... any other guy could be. i would listen to you talk about the guys you see or liked and i would make a note in my brain of how maybe i could do the same so you'd talk about me and get that same look in your eyes". he chuckles, "one time i even tried to style my hair differently and i unbuttoned a few buttons on my uniform but the captain saw it before you could. that was the day i had to run laps till i collapsed". he smiles and hesitates before looking at you, soaking in your features in the moonlight contrasting with the dim coals of the bonfire. he speaks softly and tucks a strand of hair behind or ear, "you're so beautiful, i thought it was too good to be true". you blush and lean closer to him, the two of you like magnets. you stop inches away from his face, feeling his breath hitch and you look up at him and see his eyes closed. he's nervous, how cute, you wonder if he's ever kissed a girl before but that's better to ask after. you close the distance and his body relaxed and you melt into it with him, his hands reach up and hold your face so lightly. you've always wondered what it would be like, what he would be like and it's even better than you imagined.

#aot x reader #armin aot #armin arlert #armin x reader #snk armin #aot #attack on titan #armin arlet x reader

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dramaticallytotal · 4 months ago

Note

Please expand on the other contestants finding out about Noah’s International Harem, cause it’s hilarious to me that they see this no game barely there guy and bam! he is an international heartthrob.

"Wow, Noah! I didn't know you had it in you!" Chris exclaimed with a laugh.

"What are you talking about, McLean?" Noah asked with a frown.

Chris shook his head in fondness. Noah would always be Noah, even after being flirted with while being recorded for a reality show. He really didn't think that punk boy that showed up with that, basically a mob, group of other punks from the club Duncan had been performing at was Noah's type.

"I mean, it looks like you just got yourself a punk boyfriend, dude! What, was our resident delinquent not up to your standards or tastes?"

Duncan yelled in offense at that, which made Chris smirk.

Noah, of course, rolled his eyes at Chris. "Are you deaf Old Man? Ezra was just interested in my thoughts on my book since he's read it before."

The once noisy space was absolutely silent at Noah's words.

And as though he didn't notice the silence (he didn't), Noah continued, "Plus, he acknowledged we wouldn't have a lot of time to go too in depth in our comparative analyses because of the show and he was intrigued by my view on the last chapter when I get to it so we exchanged numbers."

Silence.

Finally, Noah noticed it and looked up to everyone staring at him like he was stupid, or they just looked plain shocked. "What?"

Slowly, Chris approached Noah and put a hand on his shoulder, "Kid....that dude was hella flirting with you. Like...hella. The book was an excuse to talk to you."

"What? No, it wasn't." Noah said, though he didn't sound as sure as he usually did.

"Yeah, no. Chris is right, Noah. That guy was really hitting on you. He chose the book as an excuse because otherwise, you would have made him cry for even approaching you. He probably noticed that and thought the best way to get your attention was to ask what you were reading." Courtney stated.

Poor Noah just looked so lost. "But what about...?"

"Woah! Noah! That means Ezra is like the sixth boy to hit on you using books as an opening and the sixth to get your number from it. Haha, wild!" Izzy laughed from her perch on Owen's shoulders. Despite them not dating anymore, they were still touchy-feely friends.

"Excuse me!?" Chris was fine with the one dude but six. SIX. Who do these boys think they are???

"HOW!?" Heather yelled. She wasn't the only one who looked like they were thinking that, but she was the one to voice it.

"SIX!? WHEN?" Everyone turned to who shouted that, and it ended up being Alejandro, who also looked surprised at his shout.

"Well, there was that one in Egypt who was staying at the same hotel as us, and Izzy wanted to swim! So I dragged Noah, Eva, and Owen with. Then there was the cutie in Japan when Owen wanted to go to that karaoke restaurant, and Noah didn't like our duet, so he went outside. Oh, oh! Then! There was the American in New York who -" Izzy's rant was cut off by Noah somehow climbing up Owen to silence Izzy but putting a hand over her mouth.

His face was noticeable red, and he looked so distressed.

"Holy shit..." Duncan whispered before he started cackling. Everyone just watched as the punk laughed and laughed till there were tears in his eyes. "Who knew the loser had it in him!"

"Dude....six guys is..." Gwen looked like she was trying to hold back her own laughter. She failed and also started laughing. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Noah, it's just... dude! You have no game! None! How?"

"Hey!"

"No 'hey', man, you know it's true." Chris finally said despite the fact he would definitely be asking Izzy just who those boys were later.

"OHEMGEE!" Everyone startled when Sierra, who had been abnormally silent till then. It had scared Izzy and Noah so bad that they both fell off Owen's shoulders. "This is like so many animes I've watched! Noah! You have a harem! I can't believe I get to see one happen, IRL!!"

Chris had never seen Noah go from so flustered to pale in seconds flat before, but there was a first time for everything. The aforementioned boy quickly scrambled off the floor, huffing and puffing before pointing at Sierra dramatically, "You will not make that a thing! It's not even a thing! I don't have a harem!"

"My little buddy is so popular!" Owen squealed.

"Owen!" Noah screeched betrayed.

"You...are very popular amigo..." Alejandro chuckled, but even to Chris, it sounded forced.

Well... this is not what Chris had intended to happen, not that he knew what would happen by teasing Noah about the punk boy, but still. "So, are you going to message them all once the show is over?" He had to know.

Heather was still just standing there with her mouth agape while Courtney was yelling at Gwen and Duncan to get a grip. Cody looked like he wanted to comfort Noah, who was sandwiched between Izzy, Eva, and Owen, but he currently had Sierra gripping his arm and talking his ear off about the harem trope.

Alejandro, though, Alejandro looked shocked beyond words but also very angry. Chris would say the guy looked more jealous, but no way was he going to voice that.

Tyler looked confused but supportive.

Poor Noah looked like he wanted the floor to swallow him whole. Like a bomb going off, the boy pulled away from his friends and seemed to explode. "HOW CAN I MESSAGE THEM ALL IF THEY ALL WERE SUPPOSEDLY INTO ME?"

"WHAT KIND OF PERSON WOULD THAT MAKE ME?" Okay, this was a bigger reaction than Chris had anticipated. "I CAN'T JUST MESSAGE THEM ALL?? WOULDN'T THAT BE ME LEADING THEM ON? I DON'T WANT TO LEAD ANY OF THEM ON! THEY WERE NICE! BUT I THOUGHT THEY JUST WANTED TO DISCUSS BOOKS! THAT'S WHAT I'M GOOD AT! WHAT IF THEY- WHAT IF-"

It was when Noah started hyperventilating that they realized just how distressed Noah actually was about this. That's what it took to get Gwen and Duncan to stop laughing.

It snapped several people into action. Namely Gwen, Courtney, Heather and Eva who rushed to calm Noah down and the rest who awkwardly watched.

Oops.

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estellan0vella · 5 months ago

Text

Love In Print│Bang Chan

Prologue SS: 15 (ignore time stamps and dates) Word Count: 2.8K Content Warnings: Talks of sex (reading a submitted manuscript), talks of burning at the stake, talks of arson, joke about a suicide pact Previous Next Masterlist

The open-concept office of Levanter Literature buzzes with the kind of chaotic energy that only comes from borderline inappropriate laughter. Ayame leans back in her chair, twirling one of the many pens stuck haphazardly in her messy bun. Her light pink corset-waisted blouse rides up slightly as she stretches, her sleek black mini skirt barely covering her crossed legs. A pair of black stilettos dangle from her feet, tapping rhythmically against the floor as she giggles uncontrollably.

"Oh my fucking god," Minho wheezes, holding up a printed manuscript like it's a sacred artefact of absurdity. His black shirt is unbuttoned at the collar, his sleeves rolled up to reveal forearms that flex as he waves the pages around. "Look at this part! I swear to god, this girl's supposed to be bent like a goddamn pretzel, and the dude's out here performing Olympic-level gymnastics over her. Who the fuck writes this shit?"

Hyunjin is sprawled across the couch against the far wall, his tie loosened and his blazer tossed haphazardly on the floor. His long legs are propped over one armrest, his hand dramatically clutching his chest as he lets out a howl of laughter that echoes through the office. "I don't even think it's humanly possible to have legs that fucking long! She's either a goddamn giraffe or a centaur. Maybe both."

Seungmin, perched on the edge of his desk with his arms crossed, barely conceals his amusement. His sharp suit and meticulously styled hair are a stark contrast to the chaos around him, but the corners of his mouth twitch like he's fighting a losing battle against a grin. "Forget the legs," he says, his tone dripping with sarcasm. "They spelt dick D-I-K. That's not just a typo. That's a goddamn war crime. Someone needs to call the fucking cops."

Ayame snickers, brushing a stray pen from her hair as she leans forward to peer at the page in Minho's hands. "Oppa, who the hell even sent this in?" she asks, her lips twitching with barely concealed laughter.

"Some author under a pen name," Minho replies, shaking his head like he's seen too much. "No fucking clue who they are, but holy shit, I'm almost impressed by how bad this is. It's- it's fucking committed."

"Committed is one word," Seungmin deadpans, adjusting his glasses. "A fucking disaster is another. I'm serious, though. It's bad, but I can't stop reading it. It's like watching a train crash in slow motion."

Ayame grins, her eyes sparkling with mischief. "Oh really?" she teases, tilting her head as she props her chin in her hand. "Didn't know you were into BDSM train wrecks, Seungmin-oppa."

Hyunjin loses it, doubling over and almost sliding off the couch. His laughter is a mix of wheezing and incoherent noises, his hand slapping the armrest repeatedly. "Oh fuck, I'm dead. Dead. Someone write my fucking obituary."

Seungmin shoots Ayame a look that could cut glass, but his ears are turning red. "I'm not. Shut the fuck up."

Minho is practically crying as he flips another page, holding the manuscript up for dramatic effect. "What's actually criminal is this position. What even is this shit? Her legs are everywhere and nowhere. Physics fucking left the chat."

"Physics left when this author picked up a goddamn pen," Seungmin mutters, his voice low and dry, like he's delivering the punchline to a joke only he finds funny.

Ayame giggles, snatching the draft from Minho's hands. "Let me see that." Her eyes scan the page, widening with incredulity as she reads aloud, "'Her body arched like a dolphin mid-leap as his hands carved pathways on her skin, electric pulses of desire shooting to her core.' A fucking dolphin? Seriously?"

"Wait, wait," Hyunjin gasps between peals of laughter, rolling onto his side on the couch. "Electric pulses? What the fuck is this?"

Their collective cackling is abruptly interrupted by the sharp click of heels against the polished floor. Kim Nari strides into the room like she owns the world, her black pantsuit tailored to perfection, exuding authority and just a hint of exasperation. Her neatly styled hair and steely gaze cut through the chaos like a knife, though the faintest hint of amusement softens her expression.

"Good afternoon," she begins, her voice brisk but warm as she surveys the scene with raised eyebrows.

The four of them freeze like deer caught in headlights. Ayame hastily sets the manuscript down, cheeks flushed as she adjusts her blouse. Minho stares at Nari with wide eyes, a page still dangling from his hand.

"Don't stop on my account," Nari says, crossing her arms as she leans against the doorframe. "I love hearing my team have fun, but I'm afraid I have some news."

The room goes silent except for the faint creak of Hyunjin's couch as he sits up, his laughter replaced by a wary frown. Minho clears his throat, trying to act professional. "Noona, you're scaring me. What the fuck is wrong?"

Nari sighs, her usual calm cracking just a little. "We weren't able to secure the funding to keep Levanter as an independent publishing company. Starting next week, we'll be merging with Miroh Publishing."

The air in the room turns heavy, like the fun has been sucked out and replaced with dread. Minho's jaw drops, and he throws his hands up in the air. "Noona, no! Not those boring, uncreative, living-under-the-bridge, fucking toll-collecting trolls!"

"Oppa!" Ayame exclaims, smacking his arm.

"What?" Minho snaps, exasperated. "You've read what they publish! They wouldn't know creativity if it hit them in their boring fucking spreadsheets. They'd probably publish a fucking phone book if it sold well enough."

"Minho," Nari says, pinching the bridge of her nose but clearly holding back a laugh. "I understand your reservations, but we need to play nice with the trolls. Especially you, since you're HR."

Minho groans like he's just been sentenced to life in prison. "Great. I'm gonna have to fucking smile and nod while they tell me about their stock options and goddamn quarterly profits."

"This is going to suck ass," Hyunjin declares, flopping back onto the couch like he's given up on life. "I can already feel my creativity dying."

Ayame nods solemnly, dramatically placing a hand over her chest. "Rest in peace, our souls. Taken too soon."

Seungmin shrugs, ever the pragmatist. "Maybe it won't be that bad. I mean, it probably will. But we'll survive. Probably."

Nari's lips twitch as she watches her team. Despite their dramatics, the affection in her eyes is clear. "I believe in you all. Just try to keep the swearing to a minimum when the Miroh people are around, okay?"

The group collectively groans like teenagers grounded for the weekend. Minho slams the manuscript back onto Ayame's desk. "Anyway, back to this fucking masterpiece," he announces, holding it up like it's the Holy Grail.

"Masterpiece is a strong fucking word," Seungmin mutters.

"I hate how fucking invested I am in this," Hyunjin grumbles, rubbing his temples.

Ayame smirks, leaning back in her chair. "Well, oppas, if we're going down, we might as well go down fucking laughing."

The Levanter office is quieter than usual, the usual hum of laughter and borderline-chaotic energy replaced by a suffocating tension that hangs in the air like a storm cloud.

It's been a week since Nari dropped the merger bomb, and now the Miroh Publishing employees have officially moved in, bringing with them an unnerving sense of order and a suffocating aura of professionalism.

Everything feels wrong. Too pristine, too polished, too full of people in grey suits who talk about quarterly projections with the kind of passion that could only come from a soul-crushing love for numbers.

Ayame adjusts the hem of her red mini skirt as she steps into the shared executive assistant office. Her black blouse is tucked in neatly enough to meet the bare minimum standard of professionalism, but her hair is another story.

A messy updo with pens jutting out at odd angles like a tiny war zone atop her head. Her desk is an explosion of sticky notes, mismatched pens, half-empty coffee cups, and a precarious stack of manuscripts threatening to topple over.

She's barely sat down when the door swings open. A man strides in, moving with the kind of purpose that screams control freak. Broad shoulders fill out his crisp white shirt, his tie perfectly knotted and tucked under a tailored black vest. Dark, perfectly coiffed hair catches the overhead lighting as his sharp eyes sweep the room.

Bang Chan.

Her new co-executive assistant.

He sets his sleek black laptop down with the precision of someone defusing a bomb. His movements are clipped, deliberate, and when his gaze lands on Ayame's desk, his jaw tightens like he's just spotted a war crime.

"Your desk," he says. "is an abomination of clutter."

Ayame doesn't even look up at first, letting the silence hang just long enough to be obnoxious before she leans back in her chair. Crossing her legs, she rests her elbow on the armrest and her chin in her hand, flashing him an unrepentant grin. "Nice to meet you too."

Chan's expression doesn't so much as twitch. He opens his laptop, flipping it open with an almost militaristic efficiency. "I assumed," he begins, his voice clipped, "that you'd at least attempt professionalism, considering your position. But clearly, I overestimated."

Ayame arches a brow, the grin never leaving her face. "Oh, I haven't even pulled out the glitter yet. You know, really jazz the place up. Maybe a disco ball in the corner?"

Chan pauses, his fingers hovering over the keyboard as he slowly turns his head to look at her. "Glitter," he repeats flatly, his voice devoid of any amusement. "This is your workplace, not an arts and crafts club."

She shrugs, twirling one of the pens she pulls from her hair. "Guess you'll just have to get used to me."

His jaw visibly tightens, and he doesn't bother to hide the way his eyes sweep over her, from her unapologetically casual outfit to the chaos that is her desk. "I assumed you got this position because of your maturity, despite your age," he says pointedly, turning back to his laptop. "Clearly, I was wrong."

Ayame sits up straighter, resting her elbows on the desk and steepling her fingers like she's about to deliver a TED Talk. "Oh, don't worry, I got this job because I'm amazing at it even though I'm only twenty-three. You'll figure that out soon enough, probably after you pull that stick out of your ass."

Chan's fingers pause mid-type. Slowly, he looks up at her, his dark eyes narrowing like he's recalculating whether he even wants to engage. "Professionalism," he says, his voice low and sharp, "doesn't seem to be your strong suit, does it?"

"Strong suits are overrated," Ayame fires back, clicking her pen obnoxiously. "You seem to have plenty. Let me guess, you have them organized by the shade of grey in your closet?"

The clicking of the pen makes Chan's eye twitch, though his expression remains impassive. "I prefer efficiency," he says, his tone clipped. "Something you could clearly use more of."

Ayame leans forward, resting her chin on her hand as she looks at him with mock curiosity. "Oh, efficiency? What's it like to be so tightly wound you might snap if someone sneezes too loudly?"

Chan exhales sharply through his nose, clearly trying to keep his cool. "It's called being thorough. You should try it sometime."

"Thorough?" she echoes, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "Wow, big word. Did they teach you that in your quarterly projections porn club?"

His typing stops completely, and for a moment, the only sound in the room is the faint hum of the air conditioning. Chan looks up, his gaze locking with hers. "Do you ever stop talking?"

"Nope," Ayame says, popping the p as she leans back in her chair again, her grin widening. "It's one of my many charms. Don't worry, you'll grow to love it."

He doesn't respond, choosing instead to return to his furious typing, though the stiffness in his posture betrays his irritation. Ayame watches him for a moment, noting the way his jaw tightens every time her pen clicks.

"Oh, you're going to have so much fun working with me," she says sweetly, leaning her chin on her hand as she stares at him.

Chan doesn't look up, but his voice is tight when he replies. "Fun isn't the word I'd use."

Ayame clicks her pen again, smirking to herself. This is going to be fucking fun.

An hour later, the main office feels like a funeral. The usual noise, keyboard clacks, muted conversations, and the occasional burst of laughter, is replaced by an oppressive silence. Employees from both sides linger awkwardly in clumps, avoiding eye contact and murmuring in hushed tones about the inevitable layoffs. The room reeks of anxiety and bad coffee.

Chan steps into the centre of the room like he owns it, clipboard in hand and his expression coldly professional. His movements are deliberate, his voice loud enough to cut through the tension like a blade.

"Sooyeon, Jimin, Sooyun, Hyunwoo, Donghae, Eunwoo, Jiho, Hajoon, and Iseul," he announces, reading the names off his list like he's handing out death sentences. The words hang in the air, heavy and suffocating. "Effective immediately, your positions have been made redundant due to the merger."

For a moment, the room is so silent it's almost eerie. Then the shock sets in. A few of the named employees exchange wide-eyed, horrified glances. Others sputter protests, their voices shaky and tinged with disbelief.

"You can't be serious," Sooyun blurts out, her voice trembling. "I've been here for five fucking years!"

"This isn't fair," Hyunwoo adds, his face pale. "We didn't even get a warning."

Chan doesn't flinch. His tone is steady, almost mechanical. "You've been provided severance packages, and HR will assist you with the transition. Please see them before the end of the day."

"Transition?" Eunwoo snaps, his voice cracking with anger. "You mean, 'pack your shit and leave'?"

Chan doesn't respond, simply gesturing toward the HR office with the dispassionate efficiency of a soldier following orders. It's clinical. Brutal. Utterly merciless.

From across the room, Ayame stands with Minho, Hyunjin, and Seungmin, their expressions a mix of disbelief, anger, and simmering contempt.

Minho lets out a low whistle, shaking his head as he leans against Ayame's desk. "And so it fucking begins. The great fuckening. Congratulations, guys. We're officially the only beauties left among the trolls. I didn't even know this was happening and I'm fucking HR"

Hyunjin frowns, crossing his arms. "I thought the story was goats and trolls. You know, like the fairytale?"

Minho glares at him. "Do I look like a fucking goat to you?"

"You're stubborn enough to be one," Seungmin mutters, his lips twitching in amusement.

Minho flips him off without looking. "We're not goats, okay? We're too fucking hot for that. We're beauties, and these assholes are corporate dick-sucking trolls who wouldn't know creativity if it fucked them in the face."

Seungmin snorts, adjusting his glasses. "Very eloquent, Minho-hyung. Shakespeare would be proud."

Before Minho can retort, Han Jisung, a graphic designer from Miroh, saunters by with a smug grin plastered across his face. He's wearing a grey blazer that screams corporate drone, but his cocky swagger is unmistakable. "Yeah, because creativity really worked wonders for Levanter," he says, his tone dripping with condescension. "Oh wait. That's right. Miroh saved your asses."

Minho doesn't even hesitate. He scratches his nose with his middle finger, the gesture painfully deliberate. "No one fucking asked for your commentary."

Ayame bites her lip to keep from laughing as Hyunjin rolls his eyes. "God, they're multiplying," Hyunjin mutters, glaring at Jisung. "Like corporate cockroaches. They'll be in the walls next."

Jisung raises an eyebrow, clearly unimpressed. "Careful, pretty boy. The cockroaches might be your boss soon."

Hyunjin's jaw tightens as he steps forward, his height making him tower over Jisung. "Like I'd ever listen to you. You probably can't even spell 'boss.'"

Jisung's smirk doesn't falter. "It's B-O-S-S. You want me to write it down for you, or are you too busy practising your pout to take notes?"

Before Hyunjin can fire back, Chan walks past, clipboard still in hand, his sharp gaze cutting between them. "You've got a lot to say for someone who's already late on their first assignment," he says, his tone ice-cold and loaded with quiet authority.

Hyunjin stares after him, slack-jawed. "It's been an hour! How the fuck am I already late?!"

Chan doesn't answer, already striding away like he has far more important things to do than argue with Hyunjin.

Ayame leans toward Hyunjin, her voice low and dripping with mock sympathy. "Welcome to hell, oppa. Population: us."

Hyunjin groans, dragging a hand down his face. "I swear to fucking god, this place is cursed."

Minho crosses his arms, still glaring in the direction Chan disappeared. "Cursed? No. It's just run by assholes in suits. Same thing, though."

Seungmin sighs, straightening his tie as he looks around the room. "If this is what week one looks like, we're fucked."

Ayame clicks her pen idly, her gaze flicking back to the still-shocked employees being ushered out of the office. Her lips curl into a smile that doesn't quite reach her eyes. "Oh, we're definitely fucked. But at least we'll go down swinging."

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