#I'm also extremely insecure about my art

[a-mess-of-a-crow]

Finished him!

(click for better quality)

[whore-ibly-hot]

'Photo Shoot'

Yan!Photography Student x GN!reader x Yan!Art instructor (Joseph and Mr. Burton)

18+ Minors DNI

Warnings: All characters are legal age, multiple yanderes, dub-con touching, perverted thoughts, voyeurism, student/teacher dynamics, nude photography, no real mention of specific genitals

AN: I'm so eepy right now... Also, if you like this fic, use the tags on my masterlist to find all the other Yan!Boarding School writings.

The smoke coming from the corner of the room ceases when Mr. Burton snuffs a cigarette butt out on an... ashtray? From where you're sat, you can see him putting it out on what looks more like a student pottery bowl. That strikes you as odd, but he can be very critical of others art so you can't be suprised. Cracking his knuckles and leaning back a little, he turns to you and the extremely quiet classmate beside you, Joseph.

"Alright, lets get this show on the road, yeah? Joseph, you're our camera man, I'll have you leading this thing, running the camera's and I'll give some creative direction. Student and the master, I can finally teach some actual fucking art." Mr. Burton mumbles, as Joseph quickly begins setting up the camera on a tri-pod. You feel odd about him to say the least, despite you being the 'muse', as Mr. Burrton calls you, Joseph's barely made eye contact with you. You agreed right off the bat when Mr. Burton asked you to help one of his favorite students with some anatomy shoots, you like Mr. Burton, he's funny, honest, and that's refreshing, given you worry some people at this academy have ulterior motives. Still, you had some concerns as you fiddle with the thin top you wore at Mr. Burton's request. "Mr. Burton?" you ask, and he looks up from where he's mumbling about something with Joseph. He motions for the young man to keep working as he strolls over.

"I'm nervous." You admit, hand rubbing at your elbow as an attempt to self-soothe. "I don't usually get, nude, on camera, and i-it's not that I don't trust you, sir, but-" He puts his hand up to cut you off, gently rubbing your shoulder. "Woah, woah. I get it, I get it." He assures you, tone comforting. "You're my student, and you've got great, great potential. I've been on the art scene, kid, I see the burnout path some people go down, I see the ways people exploit and get exploited. I'm not gonna let anything happen to you. If you get uncomfortable, I'll pull you out. And trust me, being in the nude for art starts to feel perfectly normal after a while, okay?" He pauses, then sighs. "Okay, it's comfortable except for being cold as hell." He laughs.

You chuckle in return, but there's still a bit of worry. He can tell, and leans in. "What is it that worries you, exactly? If it's insecurity, trust me, the real artists are those marketing execs who can photoshop a skinny model and make change up the whole idea of beau-"

"It's not that sir, I promise. I'm just worried about other people seeing, you know? I'm worried about it getting spread around, or people getting bad ideas about me." You admit, face a little pale. Mr. Burton's brows furrow, and he slaps his hand down on his jeans. "Joseph, come here!" He yells.

Joseph jumps, hands shaking as he almost knocks over his tripod. "But- uh, the cameras-" He squeaks out, and Mr. Burton shakes his head. "You're one of the best photographers I've ever met, Joseph, I know damn well that cameras been set up for well over ten minutes already. Come here, don't be shy, don't be weird. You're freaking out the subject." At the idea him staying away is freaking you out just as much as him coming up to you, Joseph walks over. "H-hi." he greets, holding out his hand. You shake it, and it is particularly sweaty.

"Joseph is a great photographer, my best student and possibly one of the best I've ever seen. I assure you, he's a good kid. He's dedicated to his craft, this isn't a complex scheme for him to fence some nudes of you to the highest bidder." The young man's eyes widen exponentially as Mr. Burton makes his assertion, and instinctually puts his hands up in surrender. "No, no! I would never, ever. Do I- do I come off as that kind of creep, if I do I'm sorry."

"No, it's not that at all, I just struggle with, well, some issues like that." Joseph visibly frowns, and Mr. Burtons hand tenses from it's spot on the table.

"You are pretty creepy, Joseph." Mr. Burton admits, making the boy flush as the teacher playfully pushes his head. "This'll be good, good art pushes outside of comfort zones, yeah? Let's get all set up." He claps his hands together as he goes to stand behinf the camera with Joseph. You strip, and sit awkwardly before the camera in front of a messy brick wall with various stains and prints on it from Mr. Burton's studio. Mr. Burtons licks his lips subconsciously as he looks over your meek form, the clears his throat. "Okay, first position, mermaid pose. Lets get those legs to the side."

The shoot continues on for a while, until Mr. Burton suggests a more 'raw' shoot. That's how you find yourself posing, hands over your chest area and thighs ever so slightly parted while Mr. Burton sits behind you, also nude. You worried about it being inappropriate, mostly for his sake. "Couldn't this... I mean, I'm willing to do it if you think it'll be good art, but won't you get in trouble if people find out?" You ask, turning over your shoulder a bit. He scoffs again, and shakes his head. "No self-respecting person with credentials like mine would teach these silver spoon brats art, I'm all they've got." He assures you, going to move an arm around your waist from behind.

"What composition do you want, sir?" Joseph asks, face red as he uses every ounce of will-power to try and suppress an erection at the sight of you and the older man. He'll worry about the new and conflicting feelings later. He's got enough photos to die happy, but the fact you seem so willing fills him with a delusional sense of your interest in him.

"It's your shoot, Joseph. Take over directing." Mr. Burton calls back, and Joseph doesn't seem sure. "I don't know, sir, you have more of a vision than me, and-" Mr. Burton groans, rolling his head back like a kid throwing a tantrum. "Jesus christ, kid. How many times do I have to hammer in that you're a good artist? You can direct your own shoots-" He notices the violently red flush of Josephs cheeks, and chuckles. "Or is this more an issue of being to embarrassed, because I told you-" He waves his free arm around. "We are pushing the envelope, making something raw, pushing ourselves out of comfort zones. To be a great artist, you have to not be afraid to tell your NUDE SUBJECT, to spread their legs and bare it all." Joseph is completely silent, stun-locked by his gruff teachers comments. He begins examining the shot in the view-finder after taking a few shaky breathes.

"Alright, Sir... of course." He swallows, and his shaky hands adjust the lens. "I want to-to try and delineate from what other people think nude shoots are, away from like... porn and stuff. Raw, but intimate, I think." Mr. Burton nods for him to continue, and seeing the interest in your eyes at his creative direction, Joseph gets a little more confident. "If you're okay with it-" He addresses you now. "I'd like Mr. Burton to be able to touch you, nothing too invasive, just a kiss on the neck or the shoulder, maybe letting him hold your thigh?" Joseph keeps his tone soft and asking, sure to imply you can say no.

"That's alright, I trust him." You mumble, looking at the gruff art instructor and seeing to your surprise a soft look on his face. "I'm honored, little muse." He teases, and the nickname makes you flush. "Oh, and you too, Joseph, we've not talked much, um, but you seem really dedicated, I'm sure I'm in good hands."

Shit. Well, so much for keeping his dick down, but at least he doesn't think you can see from the way the lighting is set up. He nods, and you shiver, feeling a cold pair of lips and a thin stubble scratch at the surface of your shoulder. "Are they cold?" Mr. Burton chuckles, placing a few more small kisses as you hear the camera shutter snap. "I'm sorry, I can't control the thermostat in here, all this money and they can't afford to make sure I don't freeze my dick off doing my job." He's always so grumpy, even when he's trying to be sweet. You close your eyes and try to relax into the feeling. It escalates occasionally, hands on your thighs as he kneads gently at your flesh, occasionally making a complaint about something or picking at Joseph, who keeps making an odd series of grunts, but you assume he's just breathing heavy from being so focused.

It culminates in you being positioned over him, as if playing the playful or dominate role in some sort of erotic moment. Mr. Burtons hands rest on your ass, his firm yet not fully erect cock a little too close to your hole. You're chest to chest with him, and while he's relishing in the feeling, Joseph makes a hand motion, and he knows its time to pull away, at least for this ession. He's smart, knows not to rush it, and he knows this is more than enough material for the vouyeristic camerman.

"I think we got some good shots, i-it's getting late. I'll go grab something from the vending machine while you too warm up." Joseph scarmbles away, camera bag held oddly across his crotch area. Mr. Burton smiles as you slide off from him, flushed as the weight of your previous position hits you. "You were great, a real professional." He urges, scooting forward to sit beside you.

"Thank you, sir. I was trying not to get too flushed or anything, I hope I didn't sweat too much." You admit, and he shakes his head to assure you. "Nah, you did fine, but if I could make a suggestion?" You look up. "No real intimate scene like that doesn't have a couple kissing. On your neck and shoulders was fine, but lets face it, people do more than neck each other when they're getting it on like that." He glances at the door, making sure Joseph is still doing whatever it is he's doing out there. He didn't discuss this part with the young artist, but let's face it, learning to be one step ahead, to protect your work and your muse, is something he's gonna have to learn anyways. "Will you let me show you?" he asks, voice low as he leans closer to your face.

You glance at the camera. "It's not running, though shouldn't we wait for joseph to take the photo?" You ask, a little more unsure about the artistic integrity of the action. He shakes his head as he lets his stubble scratch your cheek. "This'll be practice, yeah? For next time..."

"Next time?"

"Next time." He mumbles, lips feverishly sealing against your as he hunces over your form, cold bodies pressing together and leaving goosebumps which trail down your form as the session closes out.

[puc-puggy]

really fascinated with deadpool & wolverine less as a movie and more as a corporate response to the growing insecurity in relating to and creating meaningful art. like, never have we been more aware of the impact that the relationship between art and artist is oppressively mediated by Corporation than right now with marvel, whose movies grow continually worse and more forgettable under growing corporate control, and this movie bears the weight of a particularly complicated and contentious merger. what they decided to do about it is just. fascinating. disturbing, but fascinating.

the movie is incredibly aware that it is a Product and seems to have completely sidestepped any attempt at meaningful storyline in lieu of packing as much Content into 2.5 hours as possible. and I mean Content. they broke him up with his girl & separated him from all his meaningful character connections, then sent him through a very funny but disjointed and lackluster plot, putting all the meat in nostalgic character interactions or gratuitous fan-pleaser match-ups that can work as tiktok clips. don't get me wrong, i'm a basic x-men bitch. wolverine is one of my all time favorites, especially early angry fucked up alcoholic logan. i gasped at elektra and straight up screamed when wesley snipes came into frame. I laughed out loud at the list of cocaine slang terms disney apparently has. it was fun! it succeeded in making me not mind that it was barely a movie.

and that's the rub, isn't it? it was barely a movie, and it knows it’s barely a movie. but it still has to connect with its audience somehow. and that, i think, is what's really fascinating. it forges its connection with the audience not by building characters or stakes and giving any of them genuinely grounded emotional arcs but by using a fourth-wall breaking character to commiserate with the audience about the impact of corporate ownership & profit on their relationship and access to the stories we love. while being the impact of corporate consolidation on stories you love.

deadpool makes jokes about his stupid villain and mcguffin machine, but the plot is still motivated by a stupid villain and a mcguffin machine. he jokes about being banned from doing cocaine on screen & does not do cocaine on screen because he can't. the corporation that now owns his IP has deemed it against their values. he jokes about what things "have to happen" in the movie because there is actually a list that they were given. as a friend pointed out, “the climax was exactly as contrived as it needed to be to make it a statement: ‘you see how this barely-fleshed-out villain character is just gonna kinda stand there in front of the macguffin machine for as long as we need her to so that we can have the conversations and tropes and results we want? yeah we're just gonna do that. we're gonna keep cutting back to her just standing there going Mmmmm mwah haha to specifically highlight how dumb it is. On purpose.’”

by embedding it in the plot with a character that breaks the fourth wall, the movie stops being “about” the plot on screen and starts being “about” the collective relationship to the characters, embodied by ryan reynolds, whose personal desire for a good deadpool & wolverine movie motivated by his pure love for deadpool is the mythological origin of the movie, and who was allowed to break character and say as himself to hugh jackman as wolverine “you have no idea how long i’ve been waiting for this.” he’s turned into a sort of avatar of the pure fan, who’s there to love the character and have fun and isn’t too bothered by logistics and legalities. it wants you to feel like deadpool also hates it when stories get shuffled because of corporate stockowners, like this extremely expensive bullshit is his personal protest and he's going to give them a proper sendoff & ryan reynolds was around to hold everyone up to standard. the corporation soothing the audience and fan that people who love the stories are ‘in charge’ enough to create a good time, lowering your standards and expectations of a story to what’s profitable for them to create.

kind of genius.

[nebbyy]

hello could you do headcanons smut of baldwin and his chubby wife

King Baldwin x reader - Nsfw headcanons

A/N: Wow these is the first explicit stuff I write for Baldwin!! Thank you so much for this prompt, thinking of a chubby medieval woman makes me think of all the portraits of beautiful women with the most harmonious curves I've ever seen😩😩

As always painting name is Romeo and Juliet by Frank Bernard Dicksee for my art enthusiasts :))

Warning: SMUT, reader is AFAB and uses she/her pronouns!

Unlike modern times, a fuller body has always been sign of beauty and fertility through western history

Although during medieval times anything related to attractiveness and sensuality was deemed as "bad", that still meant that a chubby woman would've been judged not for being against the beauty standard, but to be actually too tempting for the public!

So it comes without saying that young king Baldwin thought he might pass out the first time he saw you, knowing you were his betrothed

You'd awakened something in him, this burning desire to have you, to know how your soft curves would feel in his hands, how your silky skin would brush against his own

I see him having a long series of consecutive days where he woke up drenched in sweat, body slightly trembling as he'd come out of yet another wet dream about you, lying beneath him as he had his sweet way with you

He felt himself getting more and more impatient for the wedding night day to come, to finally be able to call you his

He'd also be quite insecure at first, and scared too. What if the sight of his body repulsed you? What if you wouldn't want to go near him to avoid the risk of getting the disease as well?

He wouldn't blame you for it, it'd be the wiser decision for the both of you

But still, he prays and hopes and dreams that you'd return the attraction he felt from you from the very start. He longs for the feeling of your touch against his numb body

He's a bundle of nerves during the whole ceremony, but he's good at hiding it (well the veil covering his head is); he seems to all calm down only once you're both sitting next to each other at the banquet, and you tentatively lay your soft hand over his laying on the table, shy touches blessing his skin

That night your marriage is consumed in no time, he's basically as gentle as humanly possible while he holds you in his arms, as he's slowly penetrating you

There was no really developed knowledge of foreplay or female anatomy in the middle ages, but it just felt natural for Baldwin to keep his focus on your every reactions while the two of you are making love

He doesn't know what he's doing, and neither do you considering that at that time you probably haven't even seen a naked man other than Baldwin himself, but that doesn't stop the two of you from exploring each other, taking your time to get to know what you like, what makes your eyes roll back and your back arch

I'm not sure if he'd be down for oral, I kind of see him as being a bit self conscious of the level of decay his mouth and face has reached, and I'm not too sure his cum would actually taste good with leprosy and all

Nevertheless, his fingers and cock are more than enough to bring you more pleasure than you could ever imagine

Don't expect any public stuff, Baldwin is still an extremely religious man whose values are not to be messed with: these things are meant for the privacy of your quarters alone, there's no need for him to bring this sacred thing you two have out where all eyes could possibly see

He'd probably be more on the vanilla side, being mostly against anything related to giving pain (he'd be indifferent to receiving it since his body is mainly numb, but he wouldn't enjoy it either)

Although he would probably enjoy being the more dominant one in the bedroom, the power dynamic would still remain on a pretty balanced level: you're still his beloved wife, his only equal in his eyes. That's why I could confidently say that Baldwin is the perfect example of soft dom

His favorite position would probably be missionary, just so that he could be able to see your pretty face while he pounds into you

Also because he could get to hold your plush thighs and see the delightful rolls that form on your belly

Your body screams femininity and fertility to him, an alluring combination that gets him going for as much time as you two have

His numbness also grants him a reduced sensibility, so he can afford to go more rounds at a time without having too many problems from it

But as the years pass, his mobility becomes more restricted by his declining health, and along with his agility and stamina in battle his sickness gets the best of him even in the bedroom

And through it all, his burning desire for you was what got him going, what made him spare just a little more energies to later spend with you

The two of you would have to adapt, though, probably changing positions and frequency at which you guys have sex

You might start trying to be the one on top, and he'd guide your every movement while also trying not to lose his mind over just how perfect you look riding him, your every curve bouncing as you move up and down over his cock

He dreams of giving you a baby in those moments, filling you up to the brim, seeing your body get even fuller with your conjoint love. It really saddens him to think that it might never happen

But hope is the last one to die, and he gets his hopes up every time that he comes into your welcoming body, emptying his seed into you, hoping that one day this union will give life to a creature as beautiful as its mother

[genderqueerdykes]

in searching for queer books to borrow from my library, i realized something. it is very important to read what publications are there, however, when folks ask me for book recommendations on certain queer identities, it becomes difficult, because publishing books, zines, and other writings is difficult while queer.

in many places in the world it is quite literally illegal to publish any queer material whatsoever. in other places it is so heavily stigmatized it is overwhelming for many. some queers don't have a talent for writing, and that's okay. a lot of queers live turbulent, busy, and often dangerous lives. it's hard to write when you have a lot going on in your personal life, especially when it comes to transmisogyny, transandrophobia, biphobia, and other big queer issues.

in many places in the world, outing one's self as a trans woman or transfemme could result in death. it would be extremely risky to publish something talking about lived experiences in places where trans women & femmes are constantly in danger. in many places in the world, this same struggle affects trans men, and other trans people. it can be literally a matter of life and death to publish writings or art about one's queerness depending on geographic location and circumstance

also, getting something published and distributed takes time and money, something many folks don't have. many people do not have access to queer charities or organizations that will help them publish. many people can't get an editor. many lose access to their computers, phones, files, electricity, internet, and other resources. many become homeless, or encounter housing insecurity. many queer people unfortunately live very short lives.

many intersex people don't get to even discuss our experiences, let alone write and publish them. many intersex people had procedures done to them and ages far too young to remember- and paperwork stating what ACTUALLY happened is generally totally unavailable. many intersex people live their entire lives not knowing they're intersex. there's a huge deficit on literature when it comes to intersex experiences and lives and it's because we're actively being silenced

it's not to say publications aren't out there, and i'm not going to start posting recommendations, but if you can't find a lot of published books on a certain queer identity, it's because that it's hard to write about queer experiences in general and get them published and distributed. keep searching, but if you can't find what you're looking for at a book store or library, try finding anecdotes, stories, comics, zines and other writings from people online. people talking about their experiences online is credible. not for citing as a source in a paper, but it is just as valuable as anecdotes published in a book.

[galedekarios]

Gale headcanons go! :]

thank you for your ask. i'm sorry it took this long to get around to it. my mind blanked.

i want to add that these are solely my own headcanons and just that. nothing more. if you have a different opinion, that's valid. i'm not here to argue or debate about it.

anyhow, these aren't in any particular order, just writing as i think of them:

-gale was clean-shaven before the orb and being discarded by mystra. his hair has outgrown its original style as well. this is the reason why tara hates gale's beard, even when felines usually like to rub their faces against them.

-while gale has enchanted the piano in his tower to play by itself, he can and does play himself when the mood takes him.

-gale doesn't truly get jealous or possessive. he skips that step and slips right into questioning himself and feeling sad/insecure.

-gale tends to overthink, he struggles with anxiety and feeling overwhelmed esp after the orb, but has found methods that help him deal with these feelings and bring them under some form of control to examine them ("please, i need to think... i need to retrace my steps to a glade of calm and think.")

-he cries at his wedding & struggles through his vows

-he never takes off his wedding ring

-while he is very much an acts of service person in a relationship, he learns to accept and love being taken care of and doted on by his partner

-gale is very much able to find beauty in the mundane and simple things of life: beautiful flowers in a garden, the way the light falls at sunset, the sound of rain tapping against the window, the fresh salty sea breeze in the morning, a warm cup of expensive tea, a beautiful piece of art, a touching poem

-he often prefers walking home with his partner after work instead of using portals or teleportation. it allows him to talk about both of their days and show his partner things about the city he loves so very much. it also allows him to clear his head after a long day.

-his spellbook has pages that look like this:

when tara has decided that nagging him to stop working didn't cut it anymore.

-speaking of: gale gets so absorbed into his work and research that he skips both sleep and meals

-after his long isolation and depression, struggling with orb and being affected by it physically, gale is quite slender/willowy (tara has several lines reminding him to eat and take care of himself in an origin run) with a soft stomach and no muscle definition

-he's ~175 cm

-he's touch-starved

-while he does like to cook for others, he doesn't tolerate anyone helping him with the task. he will however appreciate it if his partner cooked for him.

-his tower now is quite barren, except for his extensive book collection, having consumed most magical artefacts he owned

-after his return to waterdeep, he likes to fill it with little things he has collected over time. the space is healing as much as he is.

-gale still suffers from chronic pain flare-ups, even after the orb is gone/calmed

-he likes it when things (fabrics, clothes, pens, books, etc etc etc) are well made and of high quality, but not necessarily ostentatious

-he has an eclectic taste, sort of imparted on him by morena's own

-his father abandoned him and morena

-gale is extremely open-minded and accepting, and will entertain almost any and all thoughts and opinions as long as they are well argued for / follow a sound logic

-while he's not easily spooked or scared given how diverse and open waterdeep is, nothing quite managed to prepare him for the things he would see during the journey to cure himself and the others of the tadpole. his knowledge was mostly academic, save for the stray unfortunate death slaad encounter. he works through these things by compartmentalising. writing them down, examining them and going over them in his mind.

-he hopes that he and the friends he's made on this journey will stay close. he writes them regularly and is elated when he receives a reply himself, but will need encouragement and reassurance to organise a get-together in waterdeep.

-his biggest flaw is not hubris or the ambition in the pursuit of knowledge he held as a chosen, his biggest flaw is his sense of worth as gale dekarios, the imperfectly perfect human being, the person behind the titles and accomplishments and perceived failures and insecurities

-he still has to realise what truly happened in his 'relationship' with mystra and still has a lot of healing to do after the game ends

-in the early stages of his relationship with his partner, he's very willing to please/tolerate, at times sadly to the detriment of his own preferences (drow twin scene)

-while he takes compliments in stride, he still likes and appreciates word of affirmation and praise; his partner insulting or degrading him would wound him deeply

-while he wouldn't be a father himself, he would be perfectly happy to be the eccentric uncle. yet even so and while he does love it, he would need time to recharge his social batteries after / recover from the overstimulation that being around children for a prolonged amount of time brings.

-gale's magic is a second nature to him and he likes using it even for the many mundane things, turning the page of a book, getting a spice from a high shelf, etc

-he's a born sorcerer with a wizard's education

-after settling in waterdeep with his partner, he lets his hair grow out more

-while easily lost in his work and research, gale is extremely thoughtful about anniversaries or birthdays, always striving to find the perfect gift

-he likes reading to his partner or being read to & discussing it, exchanging thoughts and opinions

-it's canon that he does write poetry, i like to imagine he'd sometimes leave little haiku-esque verses for his partner

i'm sure i have more, but they escape me right now so. 🖤

[lunaa007]

Astrology observations #1

Welcome to my first astrology observations!

I’m in no way a professional astrologer, this is purely for fun. Take only what resonates with you! I'm happy to discuss these points further in the comments :)

♦️ Leo mars live for the praise. They love words of affirmation, especially in bed 😏 They call the attention effortlessly when exercising, dancing or other mars-related activities. But they might not always like this.

♦️ Chiron 1st house can be very insecure about their appearance if they don’t work to heal this. I know someone with this placement that hates mirrors as they never liked what they saw. But it gives great potential to heal and help others regarding these issues.

♦️ Sagittarius mars people could regularly need new experiences in their sexual life. They might be open to try everything once “just to see”, and they might lean less toward monogamy than other mars placements.

♦️ Moon in the 6th house might be more sensitive to anxiety as their emotions lie in the house of daily life and routine. So they might have to deal with their emotions on a daily basis. They might need regular physical movement and consistent routines to feel regulated and content.

♦️ Pluto conjunct MC might hate posting on social media as they could feel exposed and vulnerable if they do. They might have an intense need to keep their life private.

♦️Mercury conjunct/square/opposite Pluto might swear a lot, or at least more than what they were taught was okay. If their education was very strict they might swear only when surprised, like if they get hurt or forget something.

♦️Venus in 10th house or conjunct MC can work in the fashion or makeup industry and be known for their beauty and sense of aesthetics.

♦️Saturn in Aquarius could have interest or talents in Uranian fields such as astrology or technology. They might be motivated to work towards social causes. They also could have an emotionally distant outlook on life.

♦️Lilith conjunct Ascendant create strong reactions everywhere they go. They are provocative without trying. People can get easily obsessed with them as they exude tremendous sex appeal. But they can also get very aggressive and negative reactions towards them without any reason.

♦️Mars square pluto absolutely need to channel their energy and anger into exercise and breath work. Martial arts is the best for them. If they don't control this energy it can get dangerous for themselves and even for others in extreme cases. But if they learn to control this tremendous force, they can achieve incredible things.

♦️Venus square Saturn can have a lot of difficulties with their self-worth, which affects their relationships. If you have a low self-esteem you will settle for less than you deserve. Once they have sufficiently worked on themselves and on their self esteem, they can find great love. This doesn't mean it can't come early but it might be more challenging. However, Saturn delays but never denies. They are not doomed and will find love (this depends also on other placements and aspects).

♦️Moon in Taurus can have a very calming and healing aura. People feel at peace when with these natives, especially when hugging. They are very grounded and stable, which is felt by others and is very reassuring. However, they can be stubborn at times as Taurus is a fixed sign.

♦️Mars in the 12th house could be passive aggressive sometimes as they do not recognise their own anger and never really learn how to control it. They might have sudden outbursts which can take the people around them by surprise.

♦️Sun opposite Moon can have a difficult relationship with their mother. They can feel that their mother's personality is the complete opposite of them and that they are not understood by her. Other aspects to the moon can come accentuate this or make it easier.

♦️Pisces Mars often have a talent for dancing. One of my best friends has this placement and she is a professional contemporary dancer. Her movements are so graceful, it really looks like water moving. Mars at a pisces degree (12°, 24°) can have a gift for dancing also to a lesser extent.

♦️Pluto in the 9th house can bring transformations and soul evolutions when traveling overseas, studying a higher education or moving abroad.

Thank you for reading ❤️

© lunaa007

[narrativelysignificantturtleduck]

something that makes sokka extremely adhd relatable is that he's constantly looking for his Thing, the one Thing he's good at or useful for that makes up for any failings or flaws or ways he just can't measure up to others. at the beginning of the show he defines himself by being the oldest boy in the village & best warrior, but then he gets his ass kicked by zuko and suki and sees aang's raw power and he can't exactly think fighting is his special skill anymore. but he still thinks he has to be defined by fighting ('man of the house' daddy issues) so he calls himself the guy with the boomerang bc that's turned out to be his most useful and versatile and unique weapon, the one that other people can't outclass him at (after all, it's his most successful attack in his fight with zuko). when he loses it in "avatar day" he explicitly says it's like losing a key part of his identity and the moment katara goes "hey you're good at solving mysteries" he's like "yeah! i'm a detective! that's my new thing! and gets a new set of objects to signify it ("i believe in the power of stuff"). but detective sokka doesn't last bc throughout the entire episode he and katara are pretty equally matched in detective skills and he gets his boomerang back anyway. failed experiment.

and throughout all of this, he's figured out that people find his insistance on getting them fed & his grumpy comments funny and so he begins defining himself as the meat and sarcasm guy, and when he's a tough spot in "bitter work", bargaining with the universe to get him help, he offers that up as all he's got to give. it's obviously a Joke that he immediately asks for meat after telling the universe he'll give it up but it's also pretty indicative of how much he clings to these identities. it's all he's got (he thinks), of COURSE he can't actually give it up. they stuck that boy in a hole for 22 minutes and it revealed so much about how he sees himself.

at some point (likely around "the library" when he takes initiative to come up with a fire nation invasion plan) he also becomes the plan guy, the idea guy, and the gaang find themselves looking to him for leadership. this is perhaps the closest to fully encompassing sokka that any of his "[blank] guy" labels get, since coming up with plans involves planning when and how to fight (boomerang guy) & how to get everyone fed (meat), and people not following his plans is a major source of frustration (sarcasm).

this all culminates in "sokka's master", where the show finally names the underlying insecurity driving this quest - that he's a nonbender. katara being the last waterbender meant she was in danger and that keeping her safe was top priority, and even though hakoda and kya wouldn't have played favorites sokka probably felt a little like the unfavorite child for not being special like her. he lacks an ability, and believes his life has less value bc of it. almost like somebody with a disability and internalized ableism

(interesting, one of the people who most consistently mocks sokka for being a nonbender is toph, early on. toph has a lot of internalized ableism herself, a fear of vulnerability bc she doesn't want to perceived as weak like her parents thought she was. her bending is her disability aid, the thing that allows her to be stronger than people think, so she dismisses a nonbender until she learns better.)

piandao's response to sokka's lack of self-worth is not to train him to be great at one thing, but to introduce him to a variety of different arts, show him that his value lies not in having any one skill but in his capacity to learn and grow. there's no single thing that makes him worthy. it isn't even the combination of all of them that makes him worthy. he simply is worthy.

and i don't know if this is a unique narrative in fiction or anything but it really means a lot to me that sokka doesn't have One Thing that "makes up" for him not being a bender. he's of course extremely skilled and prodigious at many things he does in the show but there's no one savant talent that "justifies" him being in the group and i feel like so many disability narratives - especially for kids - go that route and i really appreciate that atla doesn't and simply says people are valuable because they are valuable, not because of their special abilities

[haysaca]

Argus and her recurrent toxic yuris

Finished 2.1, was a fun ride, I think I have a few thoughts in mind but rn the most prevalent one is: Damn, I did NOT expect argus and tuesday to be more toxic than valenweis. So have a compilation of my reactions I guess.

Sheesh girlie is actually just taunting her to the extreme and I didn't even include her whole jab at her candy reliance. This is legit the perfect pair for the hatesex trope.

Like for a moment, I even thought tuesday was implying she banged and stole kayla here lmao

(its canon, poor argus got ntr'd, source is me I swear I'm not just delusional)

She just insulted her outta nowhere lmao. Though a delusional mind (not me) can interpret this as tuesday wanting to break argus down to tears.

Girl was actually rendered speechless 😭😭 Sorry tuesday she does not match your freak at all!!

She cannot be tamed at all and she's so real for that ngl. I'm so glad they went all out on her lack of fear/fear is her kink because I just absolutely adore unapologetic villains and she's definitely one, or rather a pretty good psychopath since she doesn't really care much for people, only their fears (I think, I haven't seen her story yet). Anyways argus made the right decision to dip, she CANNOT handle her freak.

That's about it for this toxic pair but I wanna talk about kayla too since I feel like she ain't a much better option for argus considering yknow, her identity and affiliations 😭

I know this is just an illusion by the motel but it'd be so fucked up if their relationship was actually this toxic, like the motel digs up stuff from their memories so this insecurity or perception of kayla had to come somewhere from deep inside argus' mind.

What's worse is, she could be right, considering kayla is a top tier of manus fucking vindictae 😭. Poor girl has insecurities of being wielded like a mindless tool, tries to assure herself that the woman shes pining and looking for is not that, only for said woman to be avoiding her because shes already served her purpose for her (I think, we'll see in argus' story I guess).

Though it could be a more mutual angsty case if we interpret kayla's smile as a sign she considers argus as more than that, maybe a pet instead :P (have high doubts she actually reciprocates her feelings the same way).

Poor argus cannot escape scummy women, hope she'll find happiness in vertin's suitcase because let's be fr she's joining us.

Also I absolutely love this particular quote because it's not just a jab at argus' trust issues but also an indirect one at her insecurity in her own image, her fear of hesitating, failing and being seen as incompetent (I think she has them? otherwise i don't really know what the townspeople in her hallucination are meant to signify).

Ok one last thought: I think argus' best shot for a happy yuri out of the entire 2.1 cast is legit with Ms. Karen Kimberly over here.

Because as hostile as their interactions are, their dynamic was pretty funny and nice compared to tuesday's harassment.

They radiate big bully x dumb bimbo energy, a pretty classic and tame rivalry dynamic. Kimberly's also the one with the least malicious/mean intentions towards argus, she doesn't want to harm or even use her, she just wants to eat!

So long as they take the time to talk it out and not point lethal weapons at each other, I'm sure they could get along in some way (looking at you argus, put that gun down and listen to your heart more, you big softie).

Alright that's about it for my ramble on argus and her misfortune with women, shoutout to @jeremy_exe on twitter for cooking up the only anjoargus art I've seen so far.

[vyl3tpwny]

genuine question: why is genesis so low on ur topsters?

also, if you can: could i hear why hawaii: part ii is rated 3.5 on ur rateyourmusic? (as opposed to like. anything higher)

(p. s. your music inspires me to be the sincerest version of myself, and for that i thank you. the impact you've had on my life is unforgettable.)

genesis isn't rated low. my number one album of all time is genesis' "the lamb lies down on broadway", for about 16 years running. my topster is organized by relative colour, it's not perfect but it just looks nice!

—

when it comes to talking about music, what i like and like about it, almost 100% of the time i NEVER want to discourage people, talk down to artists, or claim my opinion as fact. the only time i will actively talk down about art is if it's purposefully harmful (see artists like: Tom Macdonald, etc).

with that said, music by miracle musical - and by extension tally hall - often does this thing where there are a handful of really impressive, well written songs that just blow me away. but then the rest of the album outside of those handful of songs are either just ok/catchy or don't interest me very much. the tally hall gang's highs are very high, and equally their lows are just sort of pace-killers for the albums.

it's dynamics like these that prevent me from liking some of my other albums for similar problems! i think albums like queen of misfits and glitter are bogged down by an absurd amount of boring filler that could have just been left out or reworked to be more interesting, it makes it hard to ever listen to those albums front to back. ironically i don't feel that way about fairytails, my 40-song long ass album, almost everything in it still feels rather purposeful to me. i listen to my own music a lot, and once i've finished a project i tend to try and listen to it and enjoy it from an audience perspective rather than an artist one.

while i'm on the topic, i don't necessarily agree with even rating hawaii pt. ii 3.5 because in the past few years i've completely lost interest in the idea of weighing albums by arbitrary scores. nowadays i like to just give 4-5's to albums i like and then ignore anything else. it doesn't really make sense to me to assign a number score to something with good faith, other than to show that score to other people. interfacing with art is not a black and white process. despite the so-called 3.5/5.0 score i gave hawaii pt. ii whenever that was, the reality is that record has influenced me and i've enjoyed it. honestly that's what matters the most. we can sit here and talk album dynamics, technicalities, compositional proficiency, lyric profundity, and """""consistency"""""" (which is a word music critics love to throw around without actually realizing what the fuck they're talking about) all day, but what matters the most is:

Did you like the music? (Yes/No)

Did it inspire you in some way? (Yes/No) [Optional]

Does it seek to do harm? (Yes/No)

Do you respect the efforts and goals of the artist? (Yes/No) [Should always be the inverse of Question 3; i.e; if you answer No to 3, then you should answer Yes to 4]

honestly if you answer yes, yes, no, yes, then it's a good album. i really don't care. not every piece of art has to push the envelope to new heights and be the most innovative thing in the world - i mean wouldn't that be extremely fatiguing and overwhelming? everyone wants to be a critic and tear down shit that doesn't click with them within the first viewing/listen these days, i don't know why, it's probably an ego thing, bred by the echo chambers in the corners of the internet. but a lot of music criticism can be COMPLETELY discarded in favour of "this just isn't for me", and a lot of people go leaps and bounds, doing mental gymnastics over internal compensations, to just avoid saying the dreaded phrase of "this just isn't for me".

trust me, i'm someone who has immense experience with tearing other people down to compensate for my internal insecurities, it happens extremely often which is why a lot of art criticism makes ZERO fucking sense. it's never about making meaningful commentary about anything, it's always just trying to justify in the format of a dissertation - the subjective experience of "this just isn't for me".

so. do i like hawaii pt. ii? yep. is it a perfect album? no. why did i rate it 3.5? probably because at the time i wanted someone somewhere to perceive me as Very Articulated and Well Educated In The Realm of Discussing Art In Front of Other People, in Order to Appear Superior in Intellect and Refined in Taste, Because I'm Insecure Just Like Everyone Else.

[pasta-in-the-pudding]

Warmly greet!🫰 I just came across your blog today and I'm already in love with it!🖤🖤🖤 Could I leave a request here where Puppeteer, Jason, Candy Pop and LJ have a S/O who has insecurities about not being good enough for them? Because, come on...they're supernatural, not quite human, and their S/O is a regular, weak human, at least from the S/O's point of view...

Oooh thank you, friend! Also, i never get to write for Candypop or LJ so i am excited to do it!

Thank you so much for requesting!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Puppeteer

He will just kind of stare at you when you tell him those feelings

Like??? Are you kidding???

He is so obsessively in love with you that the thought of you feeling like you aren't enough for him is wild to him

Instantly he will assure you that you are more than he could ever dream of, and how much he loves you

He doesnt love you for supernatural abilities or powers, he loves you for you

Again, the thought of you not being enough for him doesn't even really comprehend in his mind

it's so insane to him that you, his most favorite person in the world who he couldn't live without, thinks that they aren't enough for him

If anything, he isn't enough for you, in his opinon

you are a literal deity walking on earth, and he is lucky enough to even witness your beauty and you think you arent enough???

Yeah, those thoughts are snuffed out rather quickly by him

He will spend the entire day going over every little thing he adores about you if he has to

Jason The Toymaker

He is just kind of confused when you express your feelings to him

"Now, what's this all about?" he asks with a pitiful look towards you

He honestly thinks that it's kind of weird that those feelings are even something humans are capable of feeling

What does he care that you don't have any weird abilities?

"Even when you are old and grey I will still love you. I will love you when you are in pain, and I will love you when you are happy. You being human makes no difference to me, because I love you. Even when you breathe your last breath, your soul will live on with me in the form of my favorite doll I will keep on a special shelf, pristine and upkept"

He's kind of a helpless romantic lol

Bro gave you a whole essay

anyways, he literally could not care less if you are magical or not, he's just thinks you're neat <33

CandyPop

He kind of thinks its funny that you think that

He will snort and look at you like you're joking "why??"

"You shouldn't feel that way. It's pointless to. Because you and I both know that no matter what, I still love you. I wouldn't be with you if I didn't like you at least a little bit"

He will joke around with you and make you try to feel good about being human

You are allowed to go pretty much wherever you please without being called a demon, he can't

Your squishy flesh human body is quite sustainable on its own, being able to morph and adapt to extreme situations, which he thinks is neat

And his personal favorite about humans, specifically you, you have such a wide array of expressing yourself! You have emotions, art, studies, etc

He loves you being human and you not liking being human is strange to him

Laughing Jack

He understands the insecurity

He can't say he's ever felt it, because he gives literally no fucks, but he understands

He will do whatever you want him to do about it, really

Lord knows he doesn't know what to do

If you wanna rant, he'll listen

If you wanna just be doted on, that's what he'll do

Whatever makes you feel better

Honestly, he does find it a little peculiar that you don't like being human

Like, if he could be 5'10", wear whatever he wants, do whatever he wants, go whatever he wants, etc, he'd be soooo happy

His 7'6" ass could never

[watchingblsnowandforever]

Hello!!!! =D

So. We Are ep 13. I don't how they do this, but they keep making every episode better than the last. At this rate, I'll not be able to survive episode 16.

Warning: long post 😊😅 (there will be a smol part 2 because 30 screenshots are definitely not enough.)

We have the Best Parents in BL, but now I present to you: The Best Aunt in BL.

Subtle, Aunt Pui, real subtle. 😭

I get her. She just wants a nice, handsome boyfriend for her nephew. 😌

First of all, the symbolism is hitting me right in the face, but it's also so subtle because no one else knows the whole story, so they wouldn't be able to figure it out.

Secondly. Yes, the red and blue do clash a bit, and it's not the prettiest little painting. But. Not every painting has to be "pretty" or perfect. Just like feelings or emotions in real life. Peem didn't willingly draw over his precious painting because he thought it'd look better; he did it because he wanted it to express his feelings. This also ties into Peem's insecurity at having (apparently) failed at being Phum's comfort zone because see, in the painting it looks like the sea is embracing the roses, or protecting them.

What I'm trying to say, is that what makes art beautiful is not just what you directly see on the canvas/right in front of you. And this applies even to the "pretty" ones. The David is not just famous because it looks very good, but also because of the amount of skill and talent Michelangelo had to be able to create such a thing from a block of marble. (I'm sorry I'm not good at examples or analogies 😭)

Sir. What business do you have, making an expression like that and giving me a heart attack.

If I haven't said this before: find a man who looks at you like Phum (Pond) looks at Peem (Phuwin).

Two sides of the same coin.

Phum still feels guilty (which is very clear from his reaction to what Peem says) about ruining Peem's painting, so he wants to do something to make sure nothing like that ever happens to Peem again.

Peem is long over it (you don't ever forget shit like that, but he has definitely forgiven Phum). He met Phum because of that Incident™, and he has a new, upgraded painting, so this is just a light joke for him. But the moment he sees it's too soon for Phum, he immediately goes to reassure him he's just kidding, and he absolutely does not hold it over Phum.

A simple pinky promise, but how much does it mean to Phum?

He's never had someone to make a pinky promise with; Fang was in a similar situation as him, and Beer knew better to make a promise and have it broken by forces outside his control.

So this, this small, childish gesture means quite a bit to him. (Which is also probably why having broken it hurt him so much.)

And yet Peem, you're smiling so wide while saying that. Almost like *le gasp* you actually like it!

Let's be real here, Peem. You don't mind at all. In fact, you sounded unbearably fond saying this. You were quite literally giggling and kicking your feet. (Which fits my headcanon of him pretty well actually.)

This shot. Just >>>> (actually thinking of making it my header-)

Ma boy never misses a chance 😭👍🏼

And if he doen't get a chance, he makes one and nails that too. <3

SO CUTEE 🥺🫶🏼

Oh the teasing is on.

Pun: I did that 😌

Beer: Idiots in love. Again. *exasperated sigh*

[From this point on, I am extremely sleep deprived, so most comments made will probably (definitely) be forgotten by the time I wake up (I'm going right to sleep after posting this.]

Well, Chain, I'm sorry to be the one telling you this, but Phum moved into Peem's heart like 6 episodes ago.

Well, yeah, but Peem has to act at least a little bit like the tsundere he is, right?

Chain: "Well, can a cupid shoot an arrow at himself?"

Toey: *very telling side-eye*

Q: You really think one flirty line will trigger his half braincell to understand what he didn't in the past however many years? ...go on, I wanna see how this turns out

Pun: *pikachu meme face*

Beer: Oh damn here goes another one, we must be nearing the last episode

Phum: ????

Peem: Don't say anything don't say anything DON'T SAY ANYTHING DON'T YOU DARE FUCKING SAY A SINGLE WORD- (internally: Idiots. They're idiots.)

Ah, I love the sibling energy here. Also, initially I was like nah you're more like Tan. But then I gave it some thought. And had a Realization: he really is the Fang in their relationship, and Q really is the Tan. (I do not have the brainpower to explain rn, but tell me if you want me too, I'll include it in Part 2.)

Phum can't wait. (And neither can Peem, because I didn't see ya denying anything, babe. Instead, you gave him the softest shoulder bump in the history of soft shoulder bumps and that bigass (smitten) smile.

Oh boy this scene.

Right before this, when Peem called Phum immediately after the last brushstroke, I was smiling so hard and giggling like yesss do boyfriend-y things with each other!

Him waiting on the porch: still big smile. Here comes Phum! Ooh are they gonna flirt in the car??

My smile started dimming as the seconds ticked by and no Phum appeared on screen.

Until I finally realized what was happening.

I almost stopped breathing.

And as the scene went on my heart broke a little more with every text and every call, and I was watching that mall scene again. Except it was much much worse this time.

So long story short, I was heartbroken for both of them. Especially when Peem showed up alone with the saddest lost-kitten face ever.

But, at this point I knew Phum must have had something really urgent/unaviodable to miss his meeting with Peem because 1. He really really loves that boy and 2. He was very much looking forward to doing this with Peem.

Unfortunately, I will have to end Part 1 here (please don't kill me), and I'm loathe to end on a sad note, but I promise the next part will be much happier. It will hopefully be posted a little later today.

If you got this far, thank you so much for reading! 😊

Here, have a pudding 🍮

My previous We Are posts.

[youdent1ty]

stobotnik nation i saw the movie again and wanted to share the look and the round 2 experience

don't really have any cohesive thoughts but here's some depression-free details i enjoyed because i'm tired of being sad:

minor spoilers ahead

guys the movie got better. i don't know how they did it but i laughed twice as hard this time round and would have cried twice as hard if i had had the ability to move my eyes while watching it (i blocked out my brows and lash-glued a shit load of glitter to my face, and that crap is BINDING.)

anyway, something i really like about robotnik's characterization is how much he loves music, dance, and media. you'd expect someone with such an extreme superiority complex as him to hate something as fundamentally flawed and human as art; but nope, dude likes limp bizkit, the secret, and grooving his heart out at any given moment. it's so fun to see how this movie expands on that, with him watching telenovelas, admitting to hate watching green lantern, and having a another hilarious dance scene. (i now say "my finger is on the button, push the button" ALL THE DAMN TIME) it really grounds him and shows how underneath a whole lot of ego, trauma, and insecurity, he likes air guitaring to rock music and binging tv like the rest of us.

stone has such a wonderful dichotomy between total cattyness and sincere kindness. him being absolutely fed up with knuckles and mocking him, then immediately becoming besties with tails killed me (as it did my whole theater, it made me so happy to see the audience laughing really hard at all his jokes.) him happily babysitting shadow while making guacamole was so cute. i hope they get a spinoff together because i'm super interested in their dynamic. also i adore his casual mention of how they're about to rule the world with a smile on his face; it really reminds you he's still evil lol. i love this bitchy yet respectful direction for his character. he's just more expressive than he's ever been and i can't get enough. also kind of unrelated, but stone was absolutely a home economics kid in school. like where do these cooking and sewing skills come from?? probability wise he can't be good at everything but so far he is defying the odds.

also i know we hate him but the scenes with gerald and ivo are actually really funny. "wouldn't it be nice" is a PERFECT song for their bonding montage and the reveal it's all in vr is ridiculously hilarious to me. the scene in which they first meet is also so so entertaining because it goes on for way too long to actually be plot relevant but who cares because it's jim carrey having a nerd battle with himself and FINALLY getting to say pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis after 3 movies. ah i just genuinely love this entire movie so much it's a real issue

side note: i am actually a ginger i'm not lying this is a wig and she worked better with the fit than my real hair

[jellyskink]

Hey so, this isn't really an ask just something personal I feel like sharing. I love this AU. I find the dark humor pretty charming, and I wanna share some personal context.

I grew up in a severely neglectful hoarding environment. My mother was mentally ill and often neglected to feed me and my siblings. As a result, we became very food insecure. I've eaten spoiled food before and made myself sick. I've eaten things I knew I shouldn't have because I didn't want to waste food.

When my dad and Stepmom got custody of us my stepmom quickly learned that she had to control how much we ate. If allowed to eat until we were full we would just keep eating until there wasn't any food left.

I know what food insecurity and trauma feel like. I've been there. D!Ford is a pretty extreme example of it, but I get it. I relate to it immensely. I don't find the jokes insulting. In fact, the food jokes are some of my favorites precisely because I can relate to them. Personally, it is kind of funny, not the pain that makes a person like that, but I do have some stories of fighting with my siblings over a bag of jerky that still feel kind of absurd and silly to me.

Dark humor can be a great way of helping people feel less alone in their struggles. Feel more comfortable talking about it. It can take some of the pain off of some of the hardest parts of a person's life.

Personally, I have also experienced gross medical neglect that I still feel the consequences of as an adult. I've been punished with electric dog shock collars before and I've seen my brother yanked around violently on a leash as punishment for tugging the dogs too much on a walk.

I don't imagine a ton of people likely relate to very many of the experiences of D!Ford given how extreme his situation is, but I'm an example of someone who relates to at least a few of them. I just wanted to share my perspective and say that I do love and appreciate your art.

Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts 💖💖💖

[iridescentmirrorsgenshin]

HI HELLO I LOVE YOUR STUFF

i was wondering, for a person who has obviously thought abt them extremely in depth and drawn wonderful conclusions, how would you describe haikaveh in 3 songs?

Hiya!!!! AHHH thank you so much!! :''') I'm glad you enjoy my brainrot omg <3 ohhhh that's such an interesting question?? i've been thinking about this ask for the past few days so i'm sorry this has taken some time to get to! 3 songs is EVIL!!! i feel every song i listen to i try to relate it to Them, but i can give you my most listened to! plus an extra one (IM CHEATING!!!!)

mitski - the star (the idea of love changing with time, them acting like 'fools' when they first met because of this nonreplicable connection, them falling apart but that light still burning? them travelling very far, further apart, and then back together, always connected by what they share?? and IM CHEATING IDC!! the frost by mitski is also incredibly relevant here??? there's an incredible art of it that makes me lose my mind. mitski is haikaveh coded fr)

2. bad omens - just pretend (very evidently alhaitham's pov, the miscommunication and the misunderstandings between them wearing away at him on the inside, the idea of not being ready at first, being too different, but having the knowledge that they'll come together once more when these differences are accepted, the willingness to wait (for YEARS!!), and the slight insecurity that comes from this, it's just such a lovely song, an experience to listen to, and it really makes me think about the emotional aspect of alhaitham when he and and kaveh were apart)

3. the stiff dylans - ultraviolet (i didn't just want to offer angst, and since this is meant to describe haikaveh i wanted to at least give one upbeat option! this song is so v fun, i see this from both perspectives, just them being perpetually intrigued by the other, constantly drawn into each other's orbit, being a necessary light to each other, just yeah <3)

+1 the devil wears prada - the thread (this is my personal ult haikaveh song <333 when i first got into haikaveh, this song was on repeat, for those who like heavier music i really recommend it! i was so invested that i broke the lyrics down to relate it to haikaveh (which i did here), this song really has a chokehold on me so it's the song i'm cheating with hehe)

[halcyon-deluxe]

18, 26, 37, 71, 99, 100

18. Phobia:

Honestly I'm not afraid of much, but I really hate bugs, statues, and the ocean.

26. What's one thing you regret?

I regret not staying with my grandmother longer. I vividly remember the last time I saw her before she passed. I remember seeing her face, seeing how happy she was to see me- because she had just woken up and I was the first thing she saw- and I kept thinking how I hated that I had to say goodbye to her. I really regret leaving.

37. Have you ever been dumped?

Nope!

71. Have you ever been lost?

Honestly I don't know, I'm great with directions and I'm relatively good at familiarizing myself with my environment quickly. Unless you mean emotionally lost, because I was VERY lost and confused emotionally in 2020-2021.

putting these last 2 under a readmore cuz they are long af lol

99. Have you ever met someone who didn't seem real?

Yeah, in college 2021 I was in a weird situationship with a straight boy named August and he was like, text book perfect. Dirty blonde hair, deep green eyes, kind of lean and hunky, like he was muscular but in a "this is a product of my naturally playful and athletic lifestyle, not the gym" kind of way, and he was just unfathomably gentlemanly. 2021 was first semester coming off of a traumatic break up, and due to my minor I had to take an extra semester of college which meant my entire graduating class had finished school the semester prior. I didn't have any friends on campus due to this, but it was cool because despite the break up, I was able to use that freedom to kinda reinvent myself. August was the first friend I made, but we became friends because he had seen me give a speech in our philosophy class about Kesha for an assignment (I don't remember what the fuck I said though) and he thought it was the most interesting part of class. We ended up becoming really fast friends and throughout the year he would seek me out and idk just validate a lot of expressive decisions I made (things that I would usually be insecure about) that were a product of trying to be more authentic in spite of my break up, and it just felt like the perfect gift from the universe. Like, I remember a day where I was looking relatively nice and was feeling good about myself, so I decided to walk to a coffee shop on campus to pass the time. Out of no where, August shows up, in a gray hanes tank top (drenched in sweat) and extremely tight black running shorts. He walks up to me (he reeked from a run he was just on) backed me into a wall while placing his hand over my head (his pit is right above my face mind you) and did that very seductive "leans over your crush while looking down at them" number and just started talking to me like this wasn't the most homoerotic sequence out of a gay hallmark movie... He complimented my outfit, and we chatted for like 30 minutes EXACTLY LIKE THAT until his girlfriend showed up and then they left. Shit like that happened for 5 straight months until I graduated. I just kept thinking what the actual fuck is happening with every interaction. And that is just the tip of the iceberg. So much other almost-gay shit happened. To this day I think I hallucinated him. It was also very eerie that Folklore by T*ylor Sw*ft came out this same year and the song "August" is nearly 1-to-1 with my experience. It's almost uncanny.

100. Give us one thing about you that no one knows.

When I was 13 I submitted a drawing of Amy Rose to the Archie Comics writers for a Sonic The Hedgehog art contest and my drawing won despite it being done on notebook paper with pencil. It's where I peaked btw.

Hi bestie thanks for the ask these were fun!!