#I'm a terrible employee
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Tumblr, when my boss rang at like 4pm and asked what I'd been doing all day, here's what I didn't say:
I listened to Tony telling me about his shopping at Costco docklands
Then later in the day Tony tells me his mum has found a nice Vietnamese girl for him and Tony says she's not his type and
I rang the ATO to ask about a payg instalment
Then asked the ATO to send reminders to a client to do their BAS (wait Laura isn't that your job???? Shouldn't you be...)
I got mad at the photocopier jamming all the time and rang the maintenance people
After the maintenance guy counted the rings on the photocopier and said it's 12 years old, I had to correct him and say I remember when we got it, it was my first year working for Sophia and--- wait no that's 12 years. As you were.
Probably bagging Hieu several times
Oh a client came in to pick up tax returns and gave me a bag of Easter eggs!!!! So I went around giving people Easter eggs and Tony got two but I should've given him five more plus the bigger pink one and
A few pissy invoices
#a few phone calls later she yelled at me about an abn application and I'm almost in tears like no there was no option to put the name in and#yeah#and then i sent out some of the tax returns and left at 6 and#completely normal#you're welcome Tumblr#I'm really sorry#but like there's people who have real problems in the real world and idk i just think Sophia is just#like some thing don't matter that much???? some things shouldn't matter????? As much as sophia thinks they do???????#i don't know#anyway#it's her business and she needs to be invoicing clients as much as possible so that she can get money and#buy more houses!!!!!!!!#no I'm joking#I'm really mean#I'm a terrible employee#why do i still have a job
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If you saw me sending an email to one of the other colleges at the university asking for more information on how to do another MA, no you didn't.
#hilary for ts#school stuff#in uh my defense#at least it wasn't (another) phd?#(yet?)#anyway the tuition benefits we get as employees would pay for most/all of it and it's one of the best programs in the world for the subject#so you know while i'm here etc etc#yes i know i have made a terrible mistake
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pov you invite me into your new office after your promotion to enjoy the view
#i am having a terribly frustrating week and it's only a little bc I'm banned from cumming until tomorrow#and I'm not getting the validation i need from the usual paths so I'm throwing these to y'all as blatant bait#bc nothing cures feeling shitty and frustrated and undesirable like notes lmao#nsft#submisive and breedable#wet and needy#bd/sm brat#big bootie#big round butt#big juicy ass#boss x employee#teacher x student#star snaps#needy wh0re#needy pet#needy
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mouthing "run away" to the new girl every time my boss's back is turned
#it's her first day and it's already off to a terrible start#her supervisor didn't get her set up in the system#her assigned desk is a disaster#unfortunately I was late#I'm really bad at orientation so I just...wasn't shutting up#and now my boss has the scheduling team in her office to go over a field employee issue and she's being her Loud self#mine
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the vibe for may 23rd is noticing the roses have started to bloom. i left the windowless office with fluorescent lighting to go out into the sunshine and flowers.
#i took tomorrow off so this is my friday#look at that terrible lighting where i ate my lunch#bleh i was up there almost all day#except when i went downstairs and heard about the employee#who had quit and most likely called in a bomb threat to the office the day before#the one who got in shouting matches with the doctor#like bro you have been here nine days#i don't think you should yell at the doctor#idk i'm no expert#anyway#pretty flowers in my yard#dire straits#music#sunglasses#i guess also my face or whatever#the vibe for#brenna
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just reflecting today on the 7th poured drink tonight and recalling how when i was venting to my co-workers about yesterday and the panic attack i had and all that, she mentioned how I needed more help when I was drowning and i swear to you the immediate thing that came to mind when she said that was alan wake
#i haven't really made many drowning gifs have i#also i feel bad cause like. god#this is so stupid and convoluted and part of the guilt i'm carrying right now#our customer service department ended up being the straw that broke my back and made me have that panic attack/meltdown yesterday#and i try#i TRY SO HARD to have some empathy towards them cause i mean#they're the ones getting basically abused by our customers#and it hurts so much to me that i can't be more help#and specifically the situation yesterday was me having to jump in and finish something that idk took me all of ten minutes to do#after i asked for some forklift assistance that took maybe like half an hour#but i had asked my employees to get that done *last week* and they couldn't do it#and the poor customer service rep had to escalate it to the director of sales which she flaunted in myf ace#and i felt terrible when i snapped and said 'ok i'll drop everything i'm doing to help you'#when i did legit have a million other things i needed to do#i'm honest to god tempted to rate myself as unsuccessful this year just cause like#i've been having to do my own employee's jobs which is also my fault for maybe not being firm like i need to be#but anyway her saying how i was drowning of course made me think of alan which honestly made me feel a little better#cause i mean it's like nick right#if alan could get out of the dark place even though it took him 13 years maybe i can too#and also inspiring in the way that like. alan needed help and i probably need help too#i've gone to therapy twice once in person and once online and like nick it's just...#not my thing#but something both therapists seemed to concur upon was that my support system isn't the best and i also need to work on myself#and love myself and lmao that's soooooo much easier said than done#but anyway i'm sorry i should get a real diary or somethin but#something about the formatting of tagging like this is weirdly comforting
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america is all about Freedom so that's why instead of making sure that everyone gets the same high quality healthcare and social security (scary, communist), we're going to let your job provide you with a bunch of arcane choices, the most optimal of which can only be determined based on circumstances which you have no ability to foresee
#personal#my boss is losing out on tens of thousands of dollars of retirement money because she chose a 401(k) type plan over a pension#because she didn't think she'd keep being a state employee long enough for the pension to be worth it at all (5 years)#but fast forward 30 years and she's the head of this department she just didn't expect that#so now i'm afraid to choose the 401(k) even though if i'm still in this state in five years something has gone terribly wrong#and the health plan options are just fully incomprehensible to me like i would need to be able to predict the future AND understand it#absolutely impossible
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you know, for the most part my asthma is very under control and not too much of a bother, but heavens forbid some dust gets blown around by high winds and then I get sick with a chest cold bc my immune system was too busy causing allergies over the dust instead of doing its actual job and then I can barely go up or down a flight of stairs without losing my breath
#something fun to bring up ay my next visit to a specialist I guess#I am having a terrible time breathing#luckily I only get chest infections once every like 5 years or more but still#when I get them I am in misery#I feel kinda bad for snapping at my managers for trying to keep me at work when I demanded to be sent home#but considering how much worse I am now than I was this morning it's probably for the best#WHY managers of food places want to keep sick employees around their food and customers I will never understand#although considering that ''I like my coworkers and regulars a whole lot'' is the only thing keeping me at my job#like...the threat of getting fired isn't a threat what am I gonna do go down the street and get a similar job paying me more money?#anyhow I'm so tired of being sick I spent the beginning months of last year sick#and I don't want to spend this year's start sick as well#it's annoying to have to call out of work bc I have to do it in such a way to avoid the ''get someone to cover you'' BS#which means getting my ass up at the crack of dawn to call out every single shift#also I don't like being unable to really DO anything bc I feel too shitty to do anything#I'm just tired#sorry for the long rant I just needed to get this out of my system at least#oracle of lore
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Reasons why one would think (aka my female progenitor) I would want to get an Autism diagnosis: To understand past actions and have “resources” on my current and comfortable life
Me, the real and only valid reason, to properly be able to post my favorite image on all time: “i'm joining the war on autism on the side of autism“
#I'm not diagnosed yet#I gotta save money for a proper diagnosis and test#we ain't doing nepotism nor tolerating mommy's sister's employees infantilizing me#worst part is talking to autistic folks about that and several not only pointed the obvious ableims#but also that there was a terribly hidden intention to control through mom's intervention with HER choices of professionals#red vent#red rambles
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Activism is not cold-calling.
Activism is not cold-calling, and this is critically important to understand.
I'm seeing a lot of posts on here about 'building bridges' and 'finding community,' and then (extremely valid) response posts saying "BUT HOW??" And I'm going to explain something that can be very counter-intuitive: there is strategy involved in community.
As a longtime volunteer labour organizer, I’ve taken and taught many trainings on the strategy of talking. Something that surprises a lot of people is the very first thing you do in a union campaign. You sit down with your organizing committee, take out pen and paper, and literally map it out. You draw a physical map of the workplace: where are the entrances, exits, break rooms, supervisor offices. Essentially, ‘where is it safe to have a union conversation.’ Then you draw another physical chart of your coworkers. You sort out who is union-friendly, openly hostile to unions, or somewhere in the middle, and then you plan out very deliberately and carefully who talks to whom and in what order.
Consider: If Vocally Leftist Jane walks up to Conservative David and says "hey what do you think about unions," David is going to shut down immediately. He's not inclined to listen to Jane. But if Jane talks to Moderate Jason and brings him into the fold, then Jason is a far more effective strategic choice to talk to David, and David may actually hear him out without an instant reaction.
IMPORTANT CAVEAT: If Conservative David turns out to be Alt-Right David, and could be dangerous to follow organizers, we write him off. We are not trying to reach Alt-Right David. We are trying to reach Conservative David, who may actually be persuaded to find solidarity with other employees as fellow workers. Jason is a safe scout to find out which one he is. It does no one any good if Leftist Jane (or even Moderate Jane who is a visible minority) talks to Alt-Right David and puts herself on his radar. Not only has she done nothing to convince Alt-Right David to join a union - she's probably actively turned him against the idea - but now she's also in danger and the entire campaign is at risk. NOBODY WANTS THIS. Jane was NOT a hero for doing this. The organizing committee was foolish and enacted a terrible strategy to everyone's detriment.
Where you can make a difference is with people who will listen to you. You having a conversation with your well-meaning but clueless Centrist Democrat Auntie, and maybe gently helping her understand some things the media has been glossing over, is way more strategically useful than you marching up to MAGA Neighbour You've Met Once and trying to "build community" or "understand" them. They don't care. They're impervious, dangerous, and cruel. But maybe your beloved auntie will think about what you said, and then talk to her friend Anna who IDs as "fiscally conservative" but didn't vote because she can't bring herself to get on board with Trump. Then perhaps Anna talks to her brother Nic who has MAGA leanings but isn't all the way there yet. Proto-MAGA Nic would not have listened to you, nor would he have listened to Centrist Democrat Auntie, but he might absorb some of what his sister is saying.
This is not a cop-out or an echo chamber. This is you spending your time and energy strategically and safely. You are not a useful activist to anyone if you’re dead. Anyone who is telling you to hurl yourself directly at MAGA assholes like cannon fodder has no understanding of the strategy behind community building, and you should feel comfortable writing them off.
Last point: If you are tired, emotionally devastated, and/or in danger: take a break. This post is for people who would feel better jumping into action, not for people who are too overwhelmed to even think about it right now. You are worth so much even if you’re not actively Doing Activism, and your rest is worth more than “a break period so you can recharge and Do More Activism.” We all deserve the individual dignity of being worthy of comfort, rest & safety just on the basis of being human, outside of whatever we're doing for others' benefit. To deny ourselves that dignity is to devalue ourselves, and that’s the absolute last thing any of us should be doing right now.
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do you ever sleep your so active every time I check 😂 not a bad thing ofcourse I love your blog!
Haha this was sent last night and several things you can call me out about - sometimes I doooo have a very concerning day where I probably logged way too much screen time. And my other secret - I randomly schedule posts at very random arbitrary times and it may look like I'm here actively answering asks but I'm actually not. Along with things genuinely queued and tagged. A confusing enigma. Am I online or have I not actually been online for days? Impossible to tell sometimes and both are often true.
#Am I even here now? When I say last night which last night? The world may never know 😉😘#Mainly I get a spare hour and answer like 15-20 asks and randomly spread them out over the next week or so. Why? Chaos vibes.#But I'm also a terrible employee and go on a lot during work 😬 Boss is a moron and my work's always done so who cares.
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#i am so fucking mad at my parents#who never in their lives had to deal with a customer in person (only like clients / people from other places over the phone)#but it doesn't make them stop assuming wild things about retail#they are also convinced only stupid people work in retail and i'm a noble exception somehow (wrong and wrong)#and i have to find a more ambitious job asap#as a 19 year old undergraduate student in a foreign country#and it all started becuase i told my mom i checked if there are any inditex stores near the place i'll live knowing she's a zara fan#(i'm indifferent about brands tbh and wouldn't care anyway as long as they would respect me as much as they can respect you in retail)#my point being i literally looked for her favorite brand so i could get the employee discount there#and what i got in return was: yOu ShOuLd AiM hIgHeR aNd GeT a PrOpEr JoB#idk maybe i really am wasting all the potential i have/had#i had a terrible day at work yesterday and my father said that the difficult customers pay for my wage and i have no right to complain#my mom agreed
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[Avoids all discussion about the silent hill 2 remake]
[Is happier]
#my thoughts: im not buying the sh2 remake mainly on principle#not out of elitism. im just still salty over how they treated kojima and a bunch of their employees when they worked for konami#konami's a terrible company. straight up. sh2 remake is a cash grab.#if they really cared about their fanbase they wouldn't have canceled pt and tried to erase any way to get it on playstation#I tried going on the sh2 tag and it was just FULL of discourse. i want to be able to indulge of my favorite game without the bs#and people are getting WAY too heated over stuff that doesn't matter that much#i get it bro. i love this game too. but telling someone to kill themselves over something they like that you don't is childish#[shrugs] i guess you could say I'm boycotting. graphics are nice- but other than that i don't care and I'm trying to ignore news about it#talking trash
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🐓
#on the one hand: we got rid of the terrible office employee who was sabotaging everyone else!#on the other: the supervisor decided to replace her with...a man#men do not last long in this office#men ruin the vibes of this office#there was always at least one man in the office at my last job and it worked out fine because so many of the hort staff were men#but here? it does not work#no more walking through the schedulers' office announcing that I'm PMSing#alas alack woe upon woe#now I gotta be normal#I hate that#(before anyone asks yes he's about my age but he has a beard and beard notwithstanding I simply don't jive with his general self)#(he's not bad just meh)#thankfully we have a couple of weeks to come to grips with this development before he actually starts in the office#and I think he's only doing four days in the office and the fifth in the field#so? small mercies I guess?#(watch us get a male director when my boss retires)
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fear of rejection and inadequacy vs. fear of commitment and the unknown. fight.
ive applied for like 20 jobs in the last 48 hours and my greatest fear is that everyone will reject me and my second greatest fear is that someone will try to hire me
#i think i have a tendency to look too far ahead. like I will imagine myself hired in that position and still being miserable.#and also just not knowing what tf I'm doing and being berated for being a terrible employee.#and like. i AM a terrible employee because fundamentally at my core i will always hate work because it's work.#regardless of how appealing the nature of the work is to me#idk i think i just need to care less#but also caring less will make me stagnate in my parent's home and become a burden to everyone i love#and i can't really live with that either#job hunting
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I just finished playing Firewatch and the cozy, lonely vibes gave me another monster idea! You got a summer job as a fire watch for the closest National Park. All you have to do is to sit in your tower, and...watch. For fires. Sounds boring? Worry not, your supervisor is there to keep you company over the radio. Content: gender neutral reader, monster romance, obsessive behavior, suggestive ending
"And? What are you running away from?"
"Excuse me?"
You raise your eyebrows at the unexpected question coming from the radio. The deep voice belongs to your supervisor, the man who'll guide you throughout your stay at the National Park.
"No one picks up an isolated job in the mountains out of sheer desire. Especially someone as young as you." He chuckles briefly, then resumes in a more professional tone: "My apologies. You don't have to answer that."
What a strange way to begin the conversation, you think to yourself. Yet this nonchalance and casualty is all you have for the following months. The other watchtowers don't talk much, if at all. You're entirely alone in the wilderness, save for the mysterious man on the radio.
Slowly, you begin to warm up to his chatty nature. He likes to ask a lot of questions. A terribly curious individual, though you can understand his reasoning: he's been working for the Park for over a decade. How does one survive without another human being?
He never leaves his tower, and thus you've never seen his face. He's content, you're indifferent. Occasionally, he'll mention sketching you to pass the time.
"How would you describe your eyes, (Y/N)?" he'll ask between his pencil scribbles. "I see. I'm sure they're beautiful. Why are you suddenly quiet? Have you forgotten how to take a compliment? I'm just messing with you, kiddo."
You haven't witnessed a single fire since coming here, despite the torrid summer heat. Your days are spent hiking without aim and talking to your supervisor.
One morning, you wake up to the grating beep of the radio instead of your alarm. You pick up the small device with an irritated grunt.
"Would you like to meet?"
You need a moment to process the words. Are you finally going to greet the one man who's kept you distant company for weeks? Intriguing. You mumble your agreement, still half-asleep.
As you make your way down the hill, you notice a supply station covered in moss and overgrown vegetation. You check your map, just to be sure. There shouldn't be anything here. What a peculiar thing to stumble upon. You approach the old wooden box and lift the lid carefully.
The musty inside is filled with rows of newspapers and some scattered notes. You pluck one newspaper out, and rest your eyes on the first headline.
"National Park is saying goodbye to its employees. The area will be permanently closed after the devastating fire."
You gawk at the title, then at the photographed location.
It's your watchtower.
You scramble to read the rest of the paragraphs, words slipping behind in your frantic search. This forest has been sealed off for years. You recognize the name of your supervisor in the report: a father of three, loved by everyone, died tragically before a rescue team could reach him.
"Found anything interesting, kiddo?"
You turn around with mild hesitation. Whoever this impersonating maniac is, or what he wants, is rather irrelevant at this point. You're trapped alone with him.
Across from you stands a creature, resembling a chimera more than a human being. Long, grotesque limbs ending in black claws, hollow eyes, and mangled rows of razor-sharp teeth put together in a grin. Monstrous.
You're out of breath.
"That looks great", the creature remarks cheerfully.
"Don't use my voice to talk. It's embarrassing to hear myself like that", you lecture it as you spread out the food onto the picnic blanket.
It switches back to the supervisor's soft, masculine tone.
"Sorry, I did not mean to make you uncomfortable."
The monster extends one bony hand over your head, fanning out the fingers and dragging them across your hair in gentle strokes. What a precious little human you are.
You did not run away. A terrifying thought: losing you after all the time spent together. It didn't want to chase you down and make it even worse for you. But you stayed, you truly did.
"By the way", you say as you bite into your sandwich, stretching out your legs. "Is it you who prevents the fires? Usually it's a common occurrence here, especially in summer."
You recall the scorching flames from the newspaper.
"Yes. To keep you safe, you understand."
"Not only did you lie to me about the job, but you kept me out of work, too", you whine. "I got bored to death! Days on end!"
You're suddenly pushed down into the blanket, and you stare into the spiraling, empty sockets, confused.
"I can entertain you to your heart's desire, (Y/N)."
Its snout widens in a flirty smile, releasing a bizarre succession of clicks. Is it laughing in its natural voice?
You blush.
"I suppose there are some ways..." you suggest cheekily, unbuttoning your shirt.
[More Monsters] | [More Original Works]
#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x darling#yandere monster#monster x reader#monster x human#forest monster#yandere imagines#monster imagine#monster romance#monster boyfriend#terato#teratophillia#monster fucker
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