#I'll...uh..see myself out
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was looking and observing and i quickly realized something
i never stick to the same color palette when using soda's hair 💀 which like yeah okay sure BUT I DIDN'T??? THINK IT HAD SO MUCH VARIETY???
from first drawing to most recent:


LIKE okay ...
when i first my my first ever fanart for the outsiders, I didn't know i actually had a color filter on my screen the entire time making the art until ... 3 WEEKS AFTERWARDS.
(which is also why my coloring has become much more vibrant! because i was under the illusion my colors were ALREADY vibrant.)
so i guess it makes ??? sense as to why it's darker ??? (because I've been trying to recreate the colored filter version) but also i think it's so funny his hair is getting darker and darker on accident
and more ginger at that 💀 i swear he looks strawberry blonde rn
anywho, just a funny observation i made tonight ; here's the barbie & ken art i made of stevepop since it was a reblog n not an official post but i really liked the drawing :D
#when i found out i had a filter over my art i actually lost my shit bc it's been like that for MONTHS and i never remembered to turn it off!#so discovering my color palettes were way paler than i had initially thought they were was devastating news#but i kept it to myself (and a friend i ranted to) just because... ehhhh.... not really important information#anyways i love strawberry blonde soda actually#i think he looks very cute and silly :3c#I'll probably try and remake his palette later just so i can keep it consistent but uh uh uh we'll see#rambling to self#sodapop curtis
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Kunzakkura doodles?

kunzakkura more like frogstackkura
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I just had the most random though lmao. I feel like Gojo would join a “Gojo lookalike” contest and still lose and then when he tries to convince people he’s the actual Gojo they wouldn’t believe which would drive him crazy 😭
And then a few hours later Yaga stumbles across a video going viral EVERYWHERE of this white-haired madman running all over a Gojo lookalike contest screaming that he is the real strongest 💀💀
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"svsss gets better I swear"
BRO HOW THIS IS A HOSTAGE SITUATION NOT A ROMANCE
this is such an insane direction to take in a story
I feel like it would work if they didn't end up together in the end
Need binghe to DIEEE leave this man alone bro he barely did shit to you fr
#mxtx#mxtx svsss#svsss#scum villian self saving system#scum villain#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#luo binghe#at first i feared for binghe cause he was lowkey getting groomed but now uh#QINGQIU GET OUTTTT#bro is just tryna live#binghe creeps me tf out#choking qingqiu one second and making out with him very clearly against his will the next#deluding myself into thinking they won't end up together#it'd be such a cool story to see a protagonist get a villain arc while the villain is redeemed#I'll keep reading obv#excited to see tianlang show up#zhuzhi lang could get it#who said that
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Just a reminder, I have a patreon!!!
I've been working on actually making stuff to post more often for the lower tiers, and have been consistently doing so!
I post at least a few sketches and drawings every month for the $1 and up patrons
and I've been working on episodes and sharing some updates with my $5 and up patrons
And I have a merch club for $15 a month, but there's still some $10 slots left! I design and send usually a postcard and some stickers to my patrons every month, but sometimes I'll do some experimental stuff; last month I did foil prints, for instance, and a few months before I made magnets!


It also gets you access to private channels in my discord server, where I ask for patron input on things like the merch or drawings, and where I sometimes stream while working :)
Buuuut also, even if you don't want any of this stuff, it's a great way to support me directly if you like my work! I'm still on hiatus so I'm not making any money from work at the moment, but I'm working hard and my patreon enables me at least to buy my groceries!
Here's the link one more time, no pressure of course but I need to promote my patreon more so people actually know it exists haha
#I never promote my patreon#which is probably why I only have like 30 patrons (grimacing emoji)#it's a little embarassing tbh hahahahahahahha when my coworkers are talking about making thousands a month on patreon#and I'm like DONT LOOK AT MINE PLEASE#it's okay obviously#I never like. talk about it#cause the fun for me is making the stuff#so I'm like I made the stuff yay I'm doing it I'm doing a good job :D!#but then uh#no one knows I'm doing that#like I'm making art and posting it and I'm making merch and selling it#like did you know I also have a store?#no one knows I have a store either#I'm out here selling books and making custom prints and then I just forget to tell people#I also have open commissions..#god I'm so bad at marketing myself#but I have to get better at it#or else I'm straight up not gonna be able to keep doing this...#my goal is to be making 1k a month on patreon before time and time again is over...#cause then I'll be able to like. at least mostly support myself on my comics moving forward......#I need uhm. 2k a month minimum... to barely scrape by living...#the ideal is 3k and up lol cause of like. taxes and stuff..?#but#2k is. minimum...#gah#I'm making 10% what I have to right now HAHAHAHAH#so I guess I'm giving myself a year to actually promote myself better to see if I can't get it up to a livable amount#so that I can keep making comics#without needing webtoon#cause they only pay me like 3k a month
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Love me a dynamic of “noble and their dedicated guard dog they adopted” so glad the game gave us multiple iterations of it
HONESTLY, like we not only got four gay ships, three of which are effectively canon, we got some amazing fucking dynamics in those ships 😩🤌
#like how fucking lucky did we get with this game#LEGIT INSANE#you could also argue that you get a hint of that guard dog dynamic from adder but uh... janosh's guard dog...#ahem I'LL SEE MYSELF OUT#tam talks#kcd#kcd2 spoilers#kingdom come deliverance
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Just need it known that Bela is, in fact, finally making use of her riding crop next Keeping Up With the Dimi's chapter
#'bela needs new hobbies'#uh huh uh huh#but what if YOU'RE the new hobby dragă babe what THEN#omg.... a hobby HORSE if you will#i'll see myself out#anyway haven't written smut in ages so this is gonna be an experience but bela's riding crop will surely see us through#keeping up with the dimitrescu's#she who waits in the dark#swwitd
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i'll be like "i'm a god of writing" and then an hour passes after i post or submit something and i'll be like "i'm so dumb there's so much i could've done better if only i'd waited a bit and looked at it with fresh eyes i would've noticed how much it sucks & what i could've improved that looks so much like first draft material there's so many revisions i could make why i am i so impulsive and overconfident" and then i'll start writing something else and be like "i'm a god of writing" again
#the woes of having both a superiority and inferiority complex#also i think this might be similar to how i only get performance anxiety AFTER the performance is done. i'm always like this#i'll be super chill before a play & during it but then the play ends and i'm like “fuck they must've hated my acting” or whatever#or i'll be super chill while singing but then it ends and i go “man i sung way too quietly & i think i was out of pitch i suck”#and once again as soon as i go back to doing it again i go “wow im super great at this im amazing”#on related news i applied to a zine with 2 out of 3 snippets being ones i started writing as soon as i decided i was actually gonna apply#& i decided i wanted to apply 5hrs before i sent the application#so uh. i wrote ~2.7k words within 5 hrs & didnt give myself time to edit it bc im a dumbass w/ no concept of time#(“the applications close jan 2nd so i need to get this done asap” dude there's like a week til then why the rush- oh youve already sent it)#tbf they're more like 2nd drafts? one is a scene i'd kind of written b4 but w/ the intent of no one seeing it so i completely rewrote it#& the other is a very VERY loose eng translation of like the first quarter of one of my one-shots. when u compare its more of a rewrite rly#but still i'm looking at them now & im getting 2nd thoughts i shouldve waited eughhh#if you're a mod of that zine pls look away hahahaha.....#unless you liked those last 2 snippets & r impressed with the fact they were rushed. if so then yea im a god of writing ik ik#but to be fr tho i actually think snippet 2 is pretty strong but i think the 3rd one is... very weak. there's not much cohesion#like i def could've added more connective tissue. i was just a bit over half the wc limit so that was def smth i couldve done. ugh
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you betcha there's rebirth npcs thirstposting on warker about his mugshot like "damnnn he's a wanted man alright 🥴"
#ahem. anyway#cloud strife#rebirth spoilers#ffvii rebirth spoilers#if it wasn't clear. warker = twitter#yknow the chocobo wark#i'll. uh. see myself out
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the effect of watching kdramas is me coming up with all these crazy ass dramatic scenarios @ SELF PLEASE 😭
#stellarblabs#it's just satisfying an inner need tbh but when i write it all out it sounds so stupid LMAOOOOO#i feel like im reaching making all these connections#like ok haikyuu girl used to go to shinzen and now is at karasuno#used to be a well-known dancer but some barden bella shit happened during a national competition + she has unnecessarily competitive rival#how convenient her family's been planning to move to miyagi YAY start over#so uh cool doesnt know where to sign up yay ends up at karasuno as a manager ????#then haha funny confrontation at the training camp where she's forced to meet fuckass rival after something happens to a team member#WHATEVER SEE THIS FEELS LIKE THOSE RANDOM INSERTIONS OF A NEW CHARACTER#LIKE MY BRAIN IS COOKING BUT AT THE SAME TIME IT'S LIKE ''maybe this should just burn''#but the only reason why i come into the hq universe for this idea is she has better friends/support system aka karasuno#and the themes of teamwork + competition + rivalry + ambition + passion + resilience + talent + overcoming obstacles YOU GET THE DRILL#anyway i'll just write this for myself but YEHWJDHSJSJ#the kdrama is love next door btw. it's okay. not something i feel strongly about but lol some scenes hit close to home HAHAHAHA#when i type into the tags on my phone i feel insane#LIKE IS THAT REALLY MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT WTF#sorry guys i have nonstop yap brain#actually you know what . this should just be my lore for my keyframes oc LMAO
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it's a questionable idea on a level or two but. ya know what. I'll do it I'll write a post canon komahina story
#one of which being will I ever finish that kaev.en fic? one (1) section remains unfinished and it's got The Ideas but how conversation.....#so I guess that'll simmer forever with a sentence added per month. oh no two sections but second's the ending#anyway dr2's probably sticking with me forever on the level of anim.orphs so. uh. longterm project i guess whether I finish it or not#but I am itching for something where komahina processes kamukura as a consequence of hope's peak and what he represents#and some sorting out of that chapter 4 antagonism#and if I have yet to find one I'll try to write it myself#though some earlier ideas I had regarding dealing with kamukura being assigned symbol no humanity i felt were kinda touched on in udg#with the woh and how they were abused; so you can rEAlly see how each game continues exploring ideas built on from previous games#but it also means I'm kinda here jotting down ideas to explore like assigned worth or what hope means to someone#then going 'wait that's just udg okay shift that over a bit to the left then'#shame that udg contains. that. segment. bc ideas-wise I did enjoy the game#saying that. hajime hinata no one will do it like you you being the star of dr2 automatically makes dr2 the best one#also. as much as I understand skipping straight to komaeda's fixed brand of komahina. i think he deserves to work for it a bit more#process things a bit differently and hopefully better than trying to take everyone out ya know#komaeda shaking hands with both the woh and adult factions of udg you can rEALLy see how these games thematically follow from each other#meanwhile hinata off to the side facepalming then turning to komaru and fukawa to take notes on how to friendship now that he#has facing the future conquerered#dr talk
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Doing This
Anyways, I just wanted to take a moment to talk a little about part of why Spies Are Forever means so much to me.
Like many, many other people, I have lived some real-life version of "Doing This." I'm asexual, my romantic orientation is... complex, and after a lifetime of being taught a very allosexual concept of my own future, I really struggled to navigate what those ideas meant for me during my college years. Compulsory Heterosexuality is a hell of a thing, and I can remember watching the clock while making out with someone I thought I should, mentally calculating how soon I could end the evening without making things rude or uncomfortable.
(To be clear, no one ever forced me to do anything or was anything but respectful. It was all my own choice to follow a certain script and struggle on through discomfort.)
And then I would curl up in my bed and cry while listening to "Sunshine On My Shoulders" by John Denver over and over again. No, I do not understand that song choice either.
The resulting memories aren't... great. At the time, they further damaged my already shaky relationship with my asexuality. It was around then that Spies came out.
Watching "Doing This"... re-contextualized things. That scene allowed me to look at those moments of compulsory heterosexuality and genuinely laugh about them with fondness and patience for myself. And being able to do such a thing changed in the game in a way I didn't realize I needed. That silly spy musical that breaks my heart every time I see it also helped heal something.
So, yeah, thank you Tin Can Bros. and TalkFine for that song and those characters. And thank you Curt Mega and Mary Kate Wiles and Lauren Lopez for your pitch-perfect performances. They mattered. They matter.
#also art matters play your artists AMPTP!!!#weird thing to post about but I guess I'm uh#Doing This#hahaha sorry I'll see myself out now#Spies Are Forever#Agent Curt Mega#tatiana slozhno#TalkFine#tin can bros#rewatchers2000#hahaha this is sooo personal oops
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"I was just about to phone. It's on every channel. Oh, hello, Amy dear. Are you a policewoman now?" "Well, sometimes." "I thought you were a nurse." "I can be a nurse." "Or actually a nun?" "I dabble."
I wanted to mess around with drawing before I have to work on commissions. So. Amy :)
Fake Q&A I made Last Time I drew Amy under the cut
Q: why are you poorly drawing sexy amy? A: I was bored and didn't want to work on anything important.
Q: are you horny for amy? A: categorically no. she is useful for horny scenarios but I am not horny for any character. her and nardole are on equal playing fields on that front. however one of these characters is significantly more likely to be in this scenario.
Q: don't you complain about the show sexualizing amy? A: I complain about the show doing it without nuance. theres a difference. I think Amy Pond sexualizing herself as a response to her life experiences makes a lot of sense. I dont think moffat thought about it that hard. I have a lot of opinions on this subject.
Q: how could they have handled that topic in a kids show? A: they already made her a kissogram and invoked the idea of a sex worker for her. addressing how/why she got there and how others see her as a sexual object and so she uses that to her advantage is not stepping further than that.
Q: wow. ok. sorry i asked A: amys autonomy and how she expresses it and how its taken from her is both a significant theme of her seasons and completely glossed over in favour of using her as a love interest/the hinge of the love triangle/11 in general/her daughter and her worth and happiness is tied to her love of rory and when she cannot serve that role (ie older!amy) she is killed. I can and will talk about Amy Pond all day. forever. try me. I will. come on. this whole faq was an excuse to talk about her more--
#amy pond#doctor who#rose rambles#don't take the faq too seriously I am obviously not taking the time for nuance in it for the bit lmao#Forever telling myself “push contrast” in my art and then not doing that#whatever this one's for fun so I don't have to care#I am. primarily a furry artist btw. where is her fur :(#mostly I wanted to test out not lining#colouring under the sketch#shading like normal#and then merging the whole thing to do painting and lines and w/e on that layer#I think it mostly worked.#Its just a matter of like. Doing it more than once lmao#anyways Amy <3#I'll look over tumblrs content guidelines and see if I can post my other amy later#if so maybe I'll finish and post her too. she's uh. most risque than this one.
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FANTASTIC NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i finished & posted the ITNL 14 re-edits, WHICH MEANS!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm officially done with my re-edits project!!!!!!!!!! :D!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ive been thinking a lot today about my plans for ITNL 15, AND i have tomorrow off, so if all goes well i'll be able to start writing again. TOMORROW !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and if the chapter grips me like i expect it will then... hehehehehe
could be an update in as little as a few days, depending. i'll keep u guys updated
#speculation nation#itnl shit#im SO fucking ecstatic man ive been looking forward to this for a month and a half#that took SO much longer than i was expecting it to. but i guess editing 75k words while working full time is kind of a lot#it has been a journey. and it is now complete.#and now i can move on to the NEW THINGS!!!!!!!!! INCLUDING a chapter id been looking forward to for So Long#it's for the best that i went thru the whole fic again. itnl 14 was so hard to write bc i was just Not that mentally there with it#and also uh. The Everything.#i think 15 will be easier. MUCH easier. and im really looking forward to having proper writing motivation again.#AND......... IF ALL GOES WELL.............. i'll hopefully be able to ride that motivation train through the next few chapters#Which Means we could be seeing wolfwood in as little as a few weeks!!! maybe!!!!!!!!#i hope so !!!!!!!!!!! i wanna write him SO fucking bad#and like itnl IS a vw fic. it IS. i SWEAR. it's just mostly been grieving and pining from vash so far lksdjflsdjkfsdlkf#but it will have actual vw. eventually.#im like practically vibrating now but i need to go to sleep. so i can have the brain strength to write tomorrow hehehe#i took a melatonin to hopefully knock myself out soon. i GOTTA get some good rest tonight. for the Writing Brain.#and if i daydream about the start of next chapter.... hehehehe#more power to me then :]
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angel/devil ship fansrt really Takes a sorta toll on.me bc its like. to me its one of. an d i guess way to mix the whole feeling and messiness of religion (i mean at least what it left on me DJBFJDNFBFB) with the Blorbos From My Shows. do u get it
#wahoouy!! i jits needed to get this out. i dothat with uh. the rw soemtines . i make rrw the angel despite hcing her as the opposite of one#bc its more on what I perosnally projected in brw and more like how I see myself. Or well. how she also sees herself in yhis case I just pro#jected a Lot VFHDBFVFB. anyways i dont know if I'll post anything with that tho bc its like. weirdish id say
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I'll stop posting wips eventually but it's been five days since I've said anything and I don't want anyone to think I'm dead/dying/stuck in a ditch and withering away, so here's 10% of the reason I disappeared (the duck is stuck in rendering hell) (and my little baby laptop is screaming at me every time I open up this file)
I might still be mostly lurking for a little bit so please be patient with me in the meantime 🙏🙏
#seriously though I'm sorry for just up and disappearing like that#wanna talk to people and interact with them so bad lately but I just can't bring myself to do it#so the best i can manage is blabbing in the tags like always#i don't know wtf is going on but over the past few days I've just felt like i don't deserve to talk to anyone#tried to reblog posts from mutuals several times but something in my head keeps saying;#'yeah they don't actually care for your input at all and you're being a bother for even trying etc etc'#and i know deep down that's probably not true (i hope) but i can't reason it away you know#and i know the best solution to this is to just talk to someone#let it be known that i *did* make an attempt to#i tried texting someone (and succeeded) but i couldn't keep doing it and I'm back at square one (and now feel worse lmao)#i'm not really putting this here for anybody to see it as much as i am for myself#but i know that (hypothetically) this could be seen by a real human so it still kinda feels like I'm reaching out in a way which feels nice#makes me feel less like I'm shriveling up in my own self imposed solitude#so uh hello person who might be reading the tags (there's six of you guys here now which is crazy cause i post nothing but junk here lol)#((but thanks anyway for following and even more thanks for reading this if you did))#i'll make my way around all the posts i missed soon enough don't worry#i'm sorry i'm really not meaning to ignore anybody#i have drafted quite a few posts from moots that i couldn't finish leaving comments on but i have seen them#everyone here is super cool and talented as always <3 whether that be through art or writing or just finding neat posts to share#this wall of text is long enough and i'm very eeby so thank you again for reading this#tldr; not dead and i'll be okay eventually :)#not rb#hey look i didn't post a picture of my dog this time (a crime)#i'll make sure to share one the next time i get a good one
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