#I'll see what we can do. unspeakable stuff

[vaguely-concerned]

I was just ambushed within the turbulent halls of my own mind by some headcanons about rye ingellvar's childhood that did 15000000 points of psychic damage to me and my heart personally and also made me almost sure of how I want to play it all at the end (very very differently from how I imagined going in!). some 'oh holy fuck this changes everything' rocking my own world bullshit going on in my neurons right now I'm reeling

[the-muffin-master]

"Since the Netherbrain fell, you and Astarion have seen more of Faerûn than you ever thought possible. One night, he tells you that these last six months of happy memories are the counterweight to two hundred years of misery."

idk what's up with my obsession with drawing astarion being happy and cared for but I'm sure it's not gonna come up in therapy. AFFECTION BEAM!!!!

[captain-mj]

The serial killer au is just amazing! The perfect amount of fluff and hurt and fucked up-ness

Waiting patiently in front of my bowl for part 2

Took me a minute but I made it!

Part 1 and also CW: everything. So much. There's Dubcon. Explicit stuff. A man is murdered. Vague references to self harm. Dead Dove

Soap knew the moment the man died. Ghost was pouting about it. He took Soap down to the basement to keep him company as he poured bleach all over the blood soaked floor.

The blood went in arcs all over the floor and walls. Like there had been a fountain of it with several buckets of it hitting the floor.

"I can't believe I hit a vein. Fucker bled to death." Ghost treated the body like a broken toy. Kicking it to the side so he could pour more bleach on it. It fell so limply.

Lifeless soulless eyes looking up at him, as if to judge him. As if to ask why Soap stood upstairs doing nothing about it.

Soap nodded, feeling a bit sick. He looked away and upstairs. There was a burst of energy in his limbs. It felt like he was a rabbit, ready to sprint.

But the wolf in question would never hurt him.

Ghost, probably reading Soap's mind as he had a tendency to do, crossed the room, gloved hands trailing along his throat.

"Poised to run?"

"Nah. Much prefer being with you." He grabbed his wrist, not to stop him but to pull him closer.

Ghost rubbed his thumb against Soap's clavicle, pressing in a little. "With him gone, I guess you'll need to keep me entertained."

"You did mention something about new toys." Soap joked before noticing the way Ghost's hand tightened.

"Johnny."

Oh no. Serious voice and his name. Ghost was about to say something earth shattering.

"Do you want to see my face?"

Yep. Earth Shattering.

"What?" Soap wheezed.

"Yeah. How about this. We play a game and if you can win, I'll show you my face."

Soap panted immediately. "What? Really? What's the game?"

"I set a timer. You last."

This was some trick. "Last how? Like don't..." Soap felt himself get flustered. Yes, Ghost had put him in degrading positions and had done unspeakable things with those long fingers of his, but something about just saying "don't cum your brains out" was a little too bold for him.

"Nah. Nothing so cruel. I know you have a hair trigger."

The worst part? Soap always took longer than his partners before. Ghost was just good at what he did.

"You just have to stay awake."

Soap didn't understand, but to see Ghost's face? He'd stay up for weeks. "Yeah, okay. I agree."

Ghost grinned. Soap could see how the skin around his eyes wrinkled, even though there was no change in the actual depths. Still dead and empty. "Excellent."

He yanked him upstairs, lifting him off the ground for a few seconds. Ghost's hands were all over him. Groping him. Grabbing at him. Yanking his hair until he...

"You moan like a whore." Ghost growled at him, yanking his hair to get another pitiful moan out of him. He started to tug at his clothes, wanting Soap undressed as always. Soap obliged, loving those rough gloves on his body.

Ghost grinned. "And so you know I'm serious." He grabbed a blindfold and put it on Soap. There was a rustling of fabric after it was on and then Soap's hands were pressed to his bare face. Ghost must've shaved recently. Suddenly, he realized what Ghost's scars were. A giant smile, reaching up to his cheeks.

Did someone do that to Ghost? While Soap knew about the scars along Ghost's shoulders, he didn't think cutting a smile was something Ghost would do to himself, even if he was in the worst of mindsets.

"Just have to stay awake."

"How long?"

"You don't get to know. I can't make this easy on you. It's my face on the line."

Soap hummed softly. "Do whatever you want to me." He could feel Ghost's mouth on his body. Sweet and loving. Gentle fingers.

Soap laid back and just floated in the sensation of being prepped. Finally, he was starting to learn to go to this soft and floating place so that way he could take what Ghost gave him.

After being prepped for a good long while, his body easily able to take three of Ghost's fingers, did Ghost pull back.

Soap felt an expectedly cold on his cock when Ghost dropped lube on his cock. It made him pause, wondering what was going on. He considered voicing his confusion, but the small chance that Ghost might drop the deal kept him quiet.

Ghost's breath brushed against his cock and Soap's hips jerked up slightly, almost into his face. It made him chuckle and kiss Soap's stomach lightly.

Something touched the tip of his cock and then it started to slip down like a glove. He jerked and wiggled, not liking the feeling of cold lube and silicon quite that much. "Called a fleshlight. Just relax. Feel better in a minute."

It wasn't quite like a person, too... plastic. But it did start to feel nice. Especially when the heat from Ghost's hand warmed it up. He started to buck his hips up, even more confused by what Ghost's game was.

"Is the timer hours or days?"

The toy quickly moved faster, knocking the breath out of him. He could hear Ghost angrily whispering about Soap's stupid ability to think. It started... buzzing.

Soap felt the red on his cheeks spread to the tips of his ear. He had never used a vibrator before and this was... He whimpered and bit his lip to shut up.

It squeezed around him slowly and Soap's legs twitched. His hole clenched with the need to be filled. He wanted Ghost to finger him again. Or maybe just ram himself into him. Break him open.

Something silicon pressed to his hole too.

"Jesus Ghost. Prefer you."

"I'm flattered." Ghost grinned. He pushed it in and Soap immediately had a sneaking suspicion he knew what the challenge was. It was ridged and even with the thorough prep, it felt like he was actually going to break open from the inch that was pushing in. By the second ridge shoving inside him, Soap's legs snapped shut and both the toy around his cock and the one being pushed in stopped. It was a small mercy and a clear sign that Ghost was secretly being generous tonight.

Ghost didn't pull the stupid thing out but he did focus on the toy on his cock. It was so good. He felt himself just drifting as he took it and took it. Well, trying.

He came for the first time and Ghost just kept going. Overstimulation got worse but he could handle it. Was determined to handle it. To see Ghost's face. Blond hair maybe? What nose did he have? Soft lips?

Soap started to build up again. His stomach started to tense up into knots, legs shaking. It felt so good but it was starting to get to be too much, too fast. He was going to...

Soap jerked away before he could finish, trying desperately to get respite from the assaulting pleasure, and Ghost paused again. Slowly the toy pressed in deeper. Soap figured out this game as well. Too much pleasure or take more. The toy was now pressed right at his prostate and it only made the situation worse as his cock pathetically jumped against his stomach.

Sobs tore their way through him. Sensations bombarding him until he felt like he was nothing but what he felt from Ghost's hands. The blindfold and the deafening silence of anything but Soap's own fucked out whimpers made it feel like he really was a Ghost. Just a set of hands set to destroy him and ruin him in anyway possible.

Soap couldn't take it anymore. It made him feel so stretched and full that it started to drive him crazy. He jerked up into the toy and laid there to take the assault again. Unfortunately for Soap, it seemed the time away had not decreased his sensitivity at all. His orgasm started to build again and he just forced himself to take it. It washed over him like a wave, suffocating him.

Soap was pretty sure he wasn't hard anymore. Not from lack of trying, of course, and definitely not from lack of enjoying it. He started to cry harder, feeling the shame of being into this. Of sickeningly enjoying it. Soap pulled back from the fleshlight and felt the dildo immediately start to press deeper. Each ridge had him choking on sobs, horribly turned on and able to do nothing but take take take.

Soap shook his head. Where was the timer? They had been doing this for an eternity? Soap reached down, feeling the small bump in his stomach from where he was being impaled. If he pressed, he could feel his muscles jumping while trying hard to let him cum one more time. Despite Ghost's sadistic methods, he still struggled with more than once and three times was a struggle that took hours. It had to have been hours.

Soap came a third time, feeling warm liquid on his thighs. He wondered if it was Ghost's or himself. The idea of Ghost coming untouched at the sight of him. That watching Soap debase himself, become so debauched he'd let Ghost torture him so and get off on it. Made him cum. It got him horrifically close to a fourth time.

"I can't..." Soap gritted out. "No more. I can't..."

Ghost paused and leaned over him. "New deal."

"Sir, please." Soap couldn't. His brain wasn't working anymore. It couldn't.

"You have another hour on the timer."

"No, god please." Soap sobbed so hard the pillow under his head became wet. "I can't."

"Not much left of this toy. All the way in and I'll still give you your reward."

Soap had to think hard. Ghost's hand dragged his to show there were just four ridges left. He could do that. He could.

"Okay."

Ghost turned the fleshlight on high and slowly started to push it in.

"Wait." Soap choked out.

One of four and Soap was starting to wonder if the toy was tapered because it just felt harder with push. So much. So intense. So big. He wondered if the wetness in his thighs was his own blood. If he had been torn. If Ghost would keep him on his shelf a little longer.

"Stop."

Two of four and Soap was sobbing, hurtling towards some great beyond. He started to babble instead of talk. His body was shattering. His brain was turning to mush. So fucking big and his cock was being fucking milked a

"No."

Three of four and Soap's started to shake as he hurtled towards the edge. Just as he reached it, just as he was about to get his reward, Soap's head lolled back as he blacked out, cumming right as he did.

Ghost tsked his tongue. "Hope you have sweet dreams thanks to this." He, carefully, pulled the toy out of him, watching the way Soap gaped from it. Soap was lucky he was asleep or he'd been stuffed full of cum until he was drunk on it. Ghost used his hand and then got to work taking care of Soap. Bathing him and changing his clothes. He laid him gently back in his bed and left him to sleep.

After a little back and forth, he decided to give Soap a consolation prize. A little one. He didn't tie him up before he left. Soap could get to wander around to his little heart's content.

Ghost kissed his hair, admiring him. His bitten lips and pretty complexion. He wanted to press him between the pages of a book like a flower to preserve him. Instead, he had to settle for just admiring him. Johnny needed to sleep, so he left him to do so.

Before he did though, he picked up his phone, putting it in his pocket. The alarm had went off about 45 minutes before. Ghost had just had it on vibrate so Soap would only know if Ghost told him. It had been an insurance policy in case Ghost changed his mind about the face thing. Which he did.

Soap sobbed when he woke up. His entire abdomen was sore and his legs still felt like jelly. He tried to sit up and pain rushed through him.

How could he mess things up like that? He was so close. He was going to get to see him.

His entire over sensitive body picked up on every single drag of the sheets. Every sensation setting him on fire.

"Ghost?"

No answer.

"Ghost!" Soap called again and when no one answered, he took the blindfold off. He glanced around before seeing a note, explaining that for his efforts, Ghost left him untied.

Only one small problem, it hurt to move and there was zero chance he could walk in this state.

Soap just shoved his face into the pillows and sobbed.

[skullchicken]

I'll see if I can formulate something that's been on my mind for a while. It stems mostly from advice I've given to art students but I feel it can potentially be applied to many other things.

I feel like many people picture achieving success like this:

... but can you see what's wrong with this picture?

Success in any endeavor isn't guaranteed. And even if you are successful, it's not guaranteed it will make you happy.

But even if we assume that this chart is in fact correct...

That's still a long-ass time you're spending being unhappy.

What I told my art students is: try to find a way to make the process of learning and trying and failing enjoyable.

Sometimes you'll need to find a new perspective or do some soul-searching to achieve that, e.g.:

is it really true that you have to punish yourself to deserve enjoyment?

can you find something humorous or funny about your failures? can you make them more lighthearted for yourself?

can you exchange your expectations for curiosity?

is there a way you can make the process fun for you?

To give a non-art example: my family has an oven heated with wood. Every year we had to saw the wood into big chunks, then smaller chunks, then we had to carry them inside, several square meters of it. I used to hate it. Unspeakable stuff gets into your nose. It's itchy. There's insects in the wood. But I think I especially hated it because I was following my older sibling's example, who hated it much more, and loudly.

Then one day I realized it's only like two hours of work, really. And I can talk to my family and make jokes while we do it. And if I put on my mp3 player that means I can move my body to music, which I enjoy deeply. I can even daydream on the side! Suddenly: fun!

Or to give another example: at university I used to hate learning for exams. Until I realized what I actually hated was cramming for exams, it was staying up late and subsisting on energy drinks instead of sleep while the clock kept ticking. But as long as I started two weeks earlier instead of one week earlier, or, even better, just turned the lecture's powerpoint slides into flashcards (which I enjoyed doing because it's a bit of a no-brainer activity I can do on the side) I could just put them on my smartphone and learn them casually on long train rides. And because of the flashcard program, I could see my progress, too. Suddenly: fun!

That's just me and my specific brain, though! Also sometimes things just suck and there's nothing you can do except clench your teeth and get through it, I recognize that.

But if you want to have success to be happy and that's your goal, then having fun while learning means you've already won.

[unsettlingcreature]

here's my thoughts on the veilguard reveal trailer. I would say there's a mix of good and bad for me, but I've tagged it as critical just in case. all the bad stuff is grouped together at the top :)

I wonder if they went with a more cartoony style because of Absolution…? I'm not against a style change, but I think it's too cartoonish, I can definitely see the Fortnite/Overwatch comparisons people are making. Taash especially suffers from this WHICH SUCKS BC I LOVE QUNARI

I'm not reaaaally going to comment on the hammy Marvel-esque dialogue because this was mostly just revealing the characters. I'm more upset they labelled Emmrich as the necromancer and not the mortalitasi. Probably aiming for a wider audience 😔

Overall, the tone just feels off. If you put this next to Origins and DA2, you'd barely be able to recognise it as Dragon Age. Is this an end to its dark fantasy roots? Sad if true. We already saw the beginnings of the shift in DA:I but this is… much further :(

OK I'M DONE DWELLING ON THE THINGS I DON'T LIKE, ONTO THE THINGS I DO

Varric looks SO good, you can really tell whoever modelled him put a lot of care into it even if I personally think Mr Tethras needs to go back on the shelf 🙄 very excited to see more Harding, if they deny us a proper romance with her then I will be rioting!

I want Lucanis to do unspeakable things to me. I don't think I need to elaborate. I want to give Davrin smooches, I think he genuinely looks the best (visually) out of all the Companions. He looks SO good 🥰 Bioware, they both better be on the list of romanceable characters!

I loved the small glimpses we got of Tevinter in Neve and Lucanis' intros (assuming I'm right, those lanterns look a lot like some of the earlier concepts for Tevinter, especially Neve's)

(OURRRRRRRRRGH I WANT TO SEE MORE OF TEVINTER PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE)

The elven ruins look brilliant, regardless of what I think about the art direction a la the characters, the environments look amazing. Ain't no way my current PC is going to run this game LMAO, I'll definitely need to upgrade before DA:tV releases.

Also baby griffin:) very cute and the dragon looks AWESOME, I definitely think they've improved on them consistently with each game. I can't wait to fight with or against that big ol' beast.

I think that the trailer wasn't a total miss for me but it definitely wasn't a complete hit either. I'll be holding off on making any proper judgements until we get the gameplay teaser + more trailers in general.

[motheatenscarf]

Okay, I'm at the point where I need to do a trial in order to progress the story and I'm a tank, so I'll actually have to watch a video for that, so I took a day off to parse my thoughts on things that WEREN'T unspeakable goddamn tragedies.

I will also post thoughts on the tragedy, but later. I want to see the consequences of this loss in the narrative play out first before making a value judgment, but so far I am already leaning towards "good story beat, actually emotionally impacted me and the characters in text and was thematically appropriate."

For non-tragedy thoughts, I'm just going through screenshots and gonna post my thoughts in order based on what I clearly thought was worth screenshotting;

Okay, I already talked about how I came around on Estinien, but I also really like Ysayle. I love that she earns the name "Lady Iceheart" but is the most emotionally driven character so far in her desire for peace and believes that she's the reincarnated soul of this ancient dragon's old flame. Quite the blow to realize she isn't that and this guy doesn't recognize or care about her and that she just summoned up a primal based on her own desperate beliefs. WOOF. That's a good character arc. I want to see where she goes from there.

Also the fact that she just loves Moogles because they're adorable and makes a comment like "My heart is aflutter from mere... fluffiness??" and like, girl, same, they're so cute.

Another interaction I liked from the Moogles was when Alphinaud got mad at them for making his trial of worthiness just be the chores none of them wanted to do. He got so pissed he went and said something like, "I don't know what a 'kupo nut' is but I know they use it for currency and I've half a mind to demand some for the work I just did!" and, YOU GET EM, SWEETIE! We'll make a lil pinko out of you yet, demand compensation for your labor, work to rule, honey! I'm so proud of him!!

And another fun Alphinaud moment was when he said, in the fanciest little lad way possible, "Last one to finish their job is a rotten egg!"

And speaking of babies, Nanamo's okay! I've actually got mixed feelings on that.

On the one hand, I really like Nanamo and I fucking love Raubahn, I'm full on going to switch my faction allegiance to the Immortal Flames once I max out rep in the Malestrom, but man. The MOST exciting part of the end of ARR was when they shifted the status quo that hard! I grant you the scions are still missing and we still had to retreat to Ishgard to seek new allies, but man, handwaving it so that things can more or less go back to the way they were before kinda sucks.

I was EXCITED for that change! I'm of course glad that Ruabahn is okay and gets to keep being surrounded by tiny adorable lalafel, and I really liked Nanamo and her struggle to figure out how to help her people was compelling, but man... idk... I feel like there was more to be explored with that Ul'dah crew on the run and the city in chaos that had a lot of potential we never got to see :T

This is a relatively minor complaint, of course, the stuff with Isghard is certainly gripping enough. I'm fine if Raubahn only ever gets to be that gif of the drunk girls with the puppies when it comes to keeping all of the itty bitty babies in his life safe

Final thought, UH, they kinda dropped a bomb on me that apparently half-elves exist in this world???

I .... I mean, one would assume it was possible, but we haven't seen any until now, despite there being plenty of instances of inter-species relationships that it actually raises MORE questions than it answers. Even if Dragon Age is a copout answer, it at least means they don't have to program unique models to make all children between elves and humans just humans. It means the same of probably other pairings as well, but if you put half-elves in a setting, it BEGS the question, okay, what do mixed heritages look like across the board? And namely, uh, where are all the others? I refuse to believe that this Hilda woman is special, if there is ONE thing I know about humans and elves in any given setting it's that you can't leave them alone for 5 goddamn minutes together without drowning in half-elves. Also, the others, huh? Where are the human/au-ra babies? Where are the Au-Ra/Elezen babies? I know people be fucking these anime uwu catboys and catgirls, where are the lanky elf-cats and scaley dragon cats?!

My brother actually pointed out a very real possibility that if we have humans, and we have hrothgar..... maybe that is where miqo'te came from in the first place, which begs the question of like, okay, if you can have a half and half baby of mixed heritage, what happens if that baby has babies with a third entirely different option?

You cannot introduce this element so cavalierly and then kill my goddamn elf husband and expect me to forget, I WON'T FORGET THE HALF-ELVES THAT COULD HAVE BEEN, FF14, YOU WILL ANSWER ME!

[the-valiant-valkyrie]

Dst/worship au? :0

I'd be interested in what you have to say! :)

i've talked abt the au a little bit a short while ago, but to put it in a bit more explanatory manner, the world of worship is set in around the ending of the middle ages. humanity is steadily building- in power, technology, and audacity- and some individuals have begun to reroute their attentions and loyalties to the once-forsaken old gods; eldritch beasts whose terrible power nearly brought about the extinction of humanity.

but obviously that was like. all in the past. the elder gods are epic and would never do that a second time. obviously. cults are super safe and would never lead you astray ever.

mechanically, worship is set to play somewhat similarly to don't starve, with your selected playstyle affecting how the world reacts to you, and vice versa. however, unlike don't starve- where your playstyle is determined by your character- worship's playstyles revolve around the elder god you choose to serve. which- for a swap au- allows me much more room to play around with the dst cast. it doesn't have to be a one-to-one swap, and certain characters can share alliances with others- or be outcasts, unbelonging to any cult at all.

currently, there are only five unique gods, which i will touch upon very very briefly:

hubryus is the self proclaimed sewer of insanity. your 'standard' eldritch, unspeakable beast. he takes great pleasure in contorting the bodies of mortals, and sees man as the perfect canvas to transform- which is caused through ideas instilled in the subject's head (and its madness. the 'ideas'. the ideas are madness. you mutate when you go mad)

an-ansgaidh, the apostle of deliverance, is a blood-soaked and ancient thing. pitiful of humanity- its sentience and mortality- it has become hellbent on snuffing all sentient life from earth, in what it considers an act of mercy. he looooves blood. so much. can't get enough of that stuff. also don't ask me how to pronounce his name bc i dont know either

salithys, the deceit weaver, is probably one of the more interesting and lore relevant gods. creating a false image of herself, she portrays herself as a merciful god (somewhat reminiscent of- but not identical to- the typical interpretation of christian god), instead of the eldritch monster she truly is. using this facade, she plans to take over the world, her charming appearance masking the ruthless underbelly of her true intentions

glub, the dank lord of fertility, is a fish. a fish god, but a fish nonetheless. he's a simple thing, really. he craves for humanity to flourish and boom in population, so he can flood the earth and feast on them all. also he's a crossover god, originally from crawl. so. if you played crawl before. just think of that one guy from crawl

then there's kessessa, mother of the coven, who is also very lore heavy, but to put it simply, she's there to. protect the coven, really. in exchange for humanity's knowledge, she offers rituals to those who serve her. shes also a moth (and moths. are epic)

i am realizing that i said i would be doing a brief overview. and that i'm a big liar bc this is not at all brief. um. swagever. its my blog... and its ur fault for trusting me to not have worms in my brain

anyways, i'll talk more abt this if i'm prompted to a second time. but i'm sure you can already see where some characters would fit in (max, having insanity as his whole motif, seems obviously fitting to go with hubryus. and wilson with his stupid knowledge seeking self would probably flock to kessessa. excreta).

since worship isn't like. real yet. it's pretty difficult coming up with a plot or anything for this au. right now i'm just playing with them like dollies. but that in itself is pretty fun. we love dollies here, right. we love those thangs.

if you want to learn more about worship from the guys who actually are making it, you can check out their kickstarter page here. OR, if you want, i made a google doc that gives you links to every update, as well as a quick synopsis about what that update actually entails, if you want to have an easier time skimming than KS'... less than ideal format.

also theres doggies in worship

wooahhh epic. so cool.

[goneadrift]

1, 8 and 14 from the questions for fic writers ask game <33

Thank you 🧡

questions for fic writers

1 - What fic of yours would you recommend to someone who had never read any of your work? (In other words, what do you think is the best introduction to your fics?) Mmm… I think that's either my first posted Royai - "Silent confession" because imo it ballanced setting the scene, inner contemplations and actual interuction - or Twiyor "The things I feel now I never thought I'd find" basically for the same reason.

What do you think? 😊 Was "Is this the ending of what we've begun?" the first read for you?

14 - Are there any tropes you would only read if written by a trusted friend or writer? I suppose it's not really a trope but anything that involves a love triangle. I can't even explain it, but the situation just irks me too much. I do indulge in occasional spikes of jealousy but I don't handle outright infidelity well. Even in fiction.

8 - What song would make a great fic (to either write or read)? Ohohohooho, there are a lot. But I have a particular one. I meantioned it once on server and never returned to it but I still think it's a cool case for "Would it be fucked up if…" 😄

The song is "Corpse Bride" by Green Apelsin. Copying my attempt at translating the lyrics and the stuff I came up with under the cut.

Digging up the earth, I'll tear my fingers down to blood. I will break the grave silence in forest. The wind howls terribly, carring your call to me. This time I believe I will be lucky for sure.

Don't be scared, dear, betrothed, darling. Life won't tear us apart, don't run, wait. There is no hiding from me, as well as from fate. God has heard my pleas from the underworld.

It feels like my heart is beating again in my chest. I'll open the door to gentle death for you. We will leave the world of the living - we have no place here. You're the alive groom, I'm the dead bride.

Why is your face so sad? After all, I'm wearing an engagement ring. Maybe you don't like the pale body? Or are you in love with something mortal?

Didn't you swear loyalty and love to me? I am not afraid of pain and there is no living blood in me. But why does it hurt, this the emptiness inside? Have a look, there is a remnant of bitter tears in me.

It feels like my heart is breaking again in my chest. I'll open the door to sure death for you. You will leave the world of the living - your place is here. You're my fiance and I'm your fiancee.

It feels like there is no heart in my chest again. The door to my happiness is closed forever. I will leave the world of the living - I have no place here. You're the alive groom, I'm the dead bride.

What if soon after Maes returned from Ishval (or right before his arrival) Gracia died? Maes in desperation asks Roy for help. Roy hesitates - he knows this is a taboo and he already did may unspeakable things. Doing another one… this might be his breaking point.

So Maes finds some other shady alchemist who agrees to do it. But he lies to Maes. So this is not a human transmutation but some necromancy that makes corpse to become basically something zombie-like. Or like in Games of Thrones where Drogo was "returned to life".

They can talk and have some mixed remnants of memories. So it seems as if Gracia recognises Maes and is glad to see him. But she can stop mid speech as if in some daze. She doesn't sleep. She doesn't know she died. She doesn't understand why Maes refuses to visit her parents. Why he avoids looking at her at times.

Then she finds memoir/necrologue in newspaper. Or hears Roy arguing with Maes next room about dangers of pulling one over on nature. After a while less and less of true Gracia remains in her body. She is helpless, she is angry - and at Maes too. And she becomes dangerous to him.

So either he ends this. Or Roy volunteers to save Maes from this (this line he crossed already; it is not exactly easy, but he remembers Riza's words about "freeing" - and here the purpose is to free this shell of Gracia and Maes from despair).

[ventforthevault]

She brings me to a burger king in the village, I don't remember how we got there because I was just… floating. I remember being told to wait outside while she gathered stuff, and I walked over the bowling pins and picked up the weighed plastic ball. What was the point? What just happened? Why did I feel this pit in my stomach like I did something wrong? Then I'm in Burger King, she's ordered chicken nuggets and we've gone to the bathroom.

I'm sitting on the countertop where the sink is, and I'm watching as she flitters between cubicles to make sure it is empty. Then she turns and starts telling me that she's sorry, she never should have gone to sleep, she should have been there. And how we can't do anything until we go home. She will report him then. Until then, she'll keep him away from me and get everything ready so we can go home. I believe her.

That evening, we watch "The Most Fertile Man in Ireland". It's literally just a film of sex over and over and over again. I'm sitting on a couch, with my mum between me and the man who I just told her had done the unspeakable… and she's laughing, she's drinking wine, and explaining the sex jokes to me like it's a normal day. I can't stay there anymore. I ask if I can go to bed. I go in, I close the door, and I break down. I don't know what is happening. I don't know if anything IS happening.

It's late, it's dark, and my mum and him are now making noises. I recognise the noises. But I need to go to the toilet. I awkwardly open up the door, and the image I am faced with is my mother bent over the kitchen countertop, and J is just fucking her like a mad man. I can't tell if she's conscious or not, but she's groaning and I can't keep watching. I go to close back over the door, and he hears me.

He calls out my name, and I freeze. He locks eyes with me as he continues to fuck my mum, and says "go back inside, sweetie, I'll be in to you in a few. Ok?" I scarper into the toilet, I pee and I am shaking, I am trying to hold in cries as my mother continues to be fucked in the next room and all I can think of is if he is going to come in and do the same to me when he's finished.

I go back into the room quickly, I close the door behind me, I grab every single heavy object I can find in the room and I begin piling them up against the door. I am throwing chairs, pushing tables and bedside drawers, I'm desperate and then I realise I've trapped MYSELF.

Except I haven't. I notice the window in the room, and it's big enough for me to crawl through. I hop onto the bed and pull myself up onto the windowsill. There is a pipe directly besides my window. If he tries to open the door and realises I've locked it, he'll go through the front door and I have to run by it to get away. So I begin to climb up this fucking metal drainpipe, I pull myself up, sobbing quietly, trying to be so quiet, as the parrot cage next to the wall is going mental because it's like 1am and they were trying to sleep. I get myself up to the ledge, and I drag myself over using the lip of the roof ledge. I roll over onto the hard concrete, I am lying on my back, and I stare up at the sky. It's clear as crystal. The stars feel different than home, the moon is barely there, and I can hear no noise from below anymore as the parrots calm down.

I crawl over to gaze down from the roof at where the front door is, to make sure he doesn't come out and up here. As I stare down, my brain screams to jump. I think about running down the hill and straight into the motorway below. Maybe that is better than having to stay here for almost a week without being able to get away from him. I hear a noise, and I push myself back from the roof. He's locked the front door. I shakily move back up, and I sit there as the moon begins to fade and the sun begins to rise. I don't sleep. I can't. I cry. I think about jumping, I think about how my legs would probably just break and then I wouldn't be able to kick him or run away from him if I did.

I see the car of the villa owner drive out and I duck down. People are starting to move, so I decide I should go back inside now. He can't hurt me now, can he? I go down the steps, around the back of the villa, and struggle to get back in through the bedroom window. I fall in, I hit my elbow, I hold in the cry, and I lie back down onto the bed.

The event (TW; CSA)

My mum had gone to sleep after lunch. She had been sunbathing with no sunscreen, so of course she overheated and had to take a nap. I'll refer to him as J. That's the start of his name so makes it easier. I was wearing a thin shiny cream/brown ankle length skirt, a white spaghetti strapped fake lace shirt, my underwear had the days on them, as did my socks. (I shouldn't have to mention what I was wearing, but I need to make sure I cannot be blamed for being in a state of undress or whatever horrific excuse someone will make for a man in his 30s with 2 teen kids of his own to do this.) I was playing with the bowling balls, just enjoying the outside and the sun, when J asks me if I want to go to the field up above to search for dragonflies. I was always interested in wildlife so I said yes. I joined him and his camera up the road, just a normal walk up. We get up to the top, at this curve in the mountain, and he puts his camera bag down on the ground. He asks me if I would give him a hug, and I always felt like I had to so I went over. He wrapped his arms around me, sniffing my hair, and starts telling me about how good I am. About how pretty I was, and how anyone would fall in love with such a pretty face. His arms moved down further. He was 5 foot 5 and I was just under 5 foot 2 at this point, I was very tall. He cupped my butt like always, and I wiggled as I always do because I was uncomfortable but my face is pressed into his chest and I can't really say anything. Then his hands begin to pull up my skirt, until it's hitched over my underwear and he is pulling and flicking the band of my underwear from behind. His hand slipped under my underwear, and his fingers begin to prod over my butt and then down until he finds what he was looking for. All I know is this is the area I've been told to never let anyone touch. And his fingernails scratch. He is repeatedly saying how good I am, how pretty I am, how perfect I am, as his fingers begin to hurt me. I feel like I'm going to throw up, and I pull my arms up into my chest and then use them to push myself out of his grasp. And my privates now HURT. I think his finger nails scratched me. He tried to come back to me, to grab me, and I kicked him. I kicked him, I yelled "stay away from me!", and then I ran. And I ran all the way to the villa, in the hallway and then I stopped. My mum was asleep. She was going to be angry I woke her. I closed the front door and stood there for what felt like hours but it was probably seconds, while I tried to figure out what I could do. Then I decided that my mum had always told me to tell her if anything like that happened to me. I knocked on the bedroom door, I walked in, sat at the end of the bed and carefully shook her leg. Then shook it harder. Then yelled "mum, wake up!" She wakes up, she goes to yell at me, then sees me, and asks what is wrong. And I try to find the words.. the words I was always told to tell an adult. "J touched me... under my knickers. In my area." She was silent, and then grabbed my arm from across the bed. "What did you say?" I repeat it. A knock on the door, and J is standing at the door frame smiling awkwardly with his camera bag and asks what is going on. Mum tells him to close the door and wait. He closes the door, she looks at me, and tells me to grab my bag and shoes, we were going to go in to town to talk.

[nygmobblepot-trash]

You all thought the Isabella plot line was hard to sit through? I'll show you true pain without throwing in some random bullshit just to stop the gay agenda or whatever.

If I wrote for the show I'd make you all suffer more. I know I've talked about this night many many times, but there's so many good options. So sorry if some stuff is from past posts. I enjoy tweeking scenarios over and over again.

Ok so here's how the so called "Oswald's confession dinner" would go down. After being asked to go to dinner Ed immediately knows what it is about. Ed may be terrible at paying attention to emotions but Oswald is incapable of feeling anything that isn't extreme. Yes we all love oblivious Ed but the man doesn't shut up about love and we know he loves mind games. He's been gaslighting Oswald ever since his first sentence to the man.

Anyways. Ed dressed up real nice and gets an expensive wine. He arrives at the dinner and Oswald is at a lost for words which is common when he around Ed. Unfortunately it is because of the mind games Ed plays whether it is stunning Oswald by saying something out of left field (Aka their first meeting) or just being intimidating. The second one is new but Ed does love how the game has changed. Both stokes his ego and that's the most important part. The thing that turns Ed on? Simple. Making the king of Gotham turn into a shaking mess in his presence. The fact he can do it when he's 'oblivious' is all the more fun. Ed watches Oswald struggle to get his confession out. He doesn't let Oswald find an easy way out.

Oswald tries to look away because he can't bare to say it while looking into Ed's eyes. Ed strides over, uses his hand to gently lift Oswald's chin up so Oswald is forced to look at him, "Mr. Cobblepot is something wrong? Why can't you look at me? You know I'll fix anything for you, right?" Ed swore he saw Oswald's soul leave his body. He didn't get to savor the reaction very long as Oswald bolted to the bathroom. Even over the water running Ed could hear Oswald losing it.

Now a nicer person would have stopped the game and let the serious shit happen. But as we all know Ed doesn't concede and frankly honey if you can't win the games you don't get to be with him. So Ed decides to be even more cruel. He knows Oswald is in there giving himself a pep talk. He'll pump himself up until he's a mess of emotions then he'll storm out of that bathroom on a mission. The second he sees Ed he'll yell it out and put it all on the table. And that's a problem for Ed. He isn't done being an asshole. In his opinion that's cheating and he can't have that. So Ed does the unspeakable, he takes off his suit jacket and slightly undoes his tie. To Ed this is very scandalous.

Then as if on que Oswald does as expected and busts out of the bathroom yelling. "OKAY ED. I'M READY. DON'T INTRUPT ME I HAVE TO DO THIS. ED I- ... why did you take your jacket off? Oh and your tie is... um."

Ed bites him bottom lip to stop from grinning. "The fire" he gestures to the fireplace behind him "it has made it awfully warm in here. I thought you were having the same issues as your face has been almost as red as that fire the entire night. I can put the jacket back on if it is making you uncomfortable. I guess I felt comfortable enough around you to relax a little.'

Oswald didn't pay attention to a word he said. Ed has never had even a hair out of place. Ed taking off his jacket and loosening his always very tight and perfect tie was very new. Hell Oswald was sure that Ed slept in a suit. He knew this was false as he had gone through Ed's stuff when he was living at his place but he couldn't actually picture Ed wearing any of it.

Ed savors Oswald self-destructing for a little bit before he decides to add more pressure. Ed gets up from his seat yet again. No timid Ed in sight. It is intimidation time aka stoic Ed. Edward Nygma strides up to Oswald who's brain is still melting and towers over him. Ed states back down at him with no readable emotion. Oswald is terrified and starts to back up until he unfortunately hits a wall. Ed does the move, you know the one, he puts his hands above Oswald's shoulders on the wall and slightly leans forward closing the already short distance between them. "You're acting strange Oswald."

"W-What are you talking about?"

"You brought me here to tell me something, something obviously very important, but all night you have failed to say it. The Oswald I know doesn't have this issue. Last time I checked the king of Gotham isn't afraid of anything. But I guess I was wrong." Ed wants to see how far he can go.

At first Oswald had the urge to grab Ed by his stupid tie and kiss him but as Ed's speech went on he wanted to punch him. But the asshole did have a point. He was Oswald fucking Cobblepot, king and mayor of Gotham. Why was this tall, skinny, nerd pressing his buttons? Who did this dark haired, intelligent, handsome, and apparently strong - hey wait! Oswald needed to focus but couldn't. Turns out Oswald doesn't like Ed when Oswald thinks he can easily crush him. Nope. Turns out Oswald enjoys whatever the fuck this is. Sure at first his fantasy was making Ed a blabbering mess as he shoved him into a closet to make out with him. No this was much better except Ed hadn't moved, or rather made a move. Not that Ed would, he doesn't know how Oswald feels right? He may be a genius but he's terrible at emotions right? It's not like he's been talking about love non stop. And now that he thinks about it Ed is wearing a brand new suit. Ed has cycled through the same 7 suits for ever since they met. Why the new one now? Speaking of the suit why did he take his jacket off? Oswald craned his head to face Ed's emotionless face. "Hey Ed. Why did you take your jacket off instead of turning off the fire? You thought I was hot too and that would be the most logical option."

It was quick but for a second Oswald saw panic in his eyes. "I wear a suit all the time. It was getting stuffy so I took off my jacket and loosened my tie. Why are you trying to avoid the issue here?" Ed said matter of factly.

Oswald smiled. "Because Edward Nygma, you're fucking with me."

"Am I?"

Oswald shoved Ed away and sighed, "Yes. You almost won too. You got too cocky, like always. You know why I asked you to be here and you decided to make me look like a fool. You hid your emotions pretty well but not good enough. Your actions and eyes betrayed you. You had no reason to undress like that and I could see the look in your eyes. It's the same look you give anyone lower than you when you're showing off."

Edward stared back dumbfounded. He never saw this coming.

"When I'm around you I'm not as confident as I usually am. You took advantage of that. I may not have enough courage to say what I want to say or even do what I want to do, but you're the same as me. At least when it comes to doing. You're all bark and no bite. Let's face it. You make me just as nervous as I make you, Ed. I win."

Suddenly Ed kicks back on. "Are you calling me a coward?"

Oswald pushed himself up to whipser to Ed "Kristen kissed you first, didn't she?" A wicked grin was plastered to his face.

Before Oswald or even Ed himself realized what was happening, Oswald was shoved hard back against the wall. They were in the same position they were in minutes ago. Ed's mind was racing and he breathed hard and fast. While Oswald held on to his. Then Ed did what Oswald thought was impossible and grabbed onto Oswald's tie and angrily pulled it as he brought his face to Oswald's.

As it turns out Ed is a good kisser... an impossiblely good kisser. Oswald doesn't know if it is due to Ed being pissed off or what. Oswald had even made a bet that Ed was a terrible kisser. This was the first time he was happy to lose money.

Unfortunately the only bad thing was the kiss didn't last long enough in Oswald's opinion. Which of course would be never. They had to breathe eventually. Turns out that was a new games as well. Both men tried their best not to be the first one to break. Oswald lost but he was holding his breath before the kiss so that isn't fair.

"I win." Ed said out of breath and let go of Oswald.

Oswald choked on his own laughter. "Are you kidding me?! If anyone won it was definitely me. I only said that shit so you'd do something and guess what, you did it!"

Oswald watched as Ed tried to compute that information. When he did his eyes went wide. "You manipulated me."

"You did it first to be fair, I just ended it. I always get what I want in the end, my dear Ed."

"Damn it. No matter what I do I play into your hands."

Don't say it Oswald. Don't say it.

...

Fuck it.

"What are you going to do about it? The great Riddler defeated by the Penguin."

Ed said nothing as he he grabbed Oswald by the wrist and almost ran up the steps to Oswald's room. Where they had a nice conversation and nothing else :)

[dollwritesarchive]

HI BABE SO NOW THAT YOU WATCHED IT..TOGE. THATS ALL. I loved seeing him use his quirk more and the part where he was doing all those backflips!?? Also the movie made me like maki even more I'm rooting for her so hard and THE SPLIT MY GOD 💀 hate to admit it but it also made me like gojo a little, like not enough to thirst over him but him genuinely caring about yuta and itadori is pretty cute

I WILL DEFINITELY ADD SOME DABI CONTENT FOR YOU OMG 😍 I'll probably also add a shigaraki one too since hes my second favorite and I think you'll like him. In some ways he kinda reminds me of mahito, like I've seen some people describe him as almost a man child in the beginning of the anime before he turns into a real monster. I dont really keep up with the manga but apparently hes really fucking shit up right now 👀

So literally the only content I've seen of dio is the tiktok you sent me and somehow I had a dream of him last night where he had me in a mating press so I thank you for influencing that experience and I WILL start watching it soon lol

Also now that you finished mugen train (I'm guessing?) CAN WE PLEASE TALK ABOUT ENMU 👀 HES THE PRETTIEST OF ALL BOYS I LOVE HIM 😭 as of right now hes probably my second favorite demon but that could definitely change. And idk about rengoku but I would turn into a demon without a second thought for akaza, I would let that man do unspeakable things to me lol.

And as for my favorite demon... I HAD A HEART ATTACK SEEING YOU POST ABOUT GYUTARO IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS DAY AAAHHH ! Not only is he my favorite demon but he also might be my second favorite anime character ever, like you have no idea how hard it was for me to not talk about him or spoil anything and stuff every time we talked about demon slayer lol. I'm not sure how far along you are and what episode you're on so I won't say much other than hes my angel and I adore him 🥰 also idk who his voice actor is but I am way too attracted to his voice, the whiny psychoticness really does it for me lol 🥵

Also the fact that you started kinktober WITH THAT FIC HOLY SHIT YOURE STARTING WITH A BANG 👀 I love that it started out with reader being in love with mahito bc I definitely would. The whole feeling special is really calling me out lol. I literally screamed when reader looked over to see choso and haruta watching and jacking off omg and I was NOT expecting geto to put it in the same hole like it was such a pleasant surprise that I dont get to read about often lol. I'm saving your other kinktober fics to read this weekend when I have more time to really sit down and enjoy them but I'm so excited like I cant believe you have a fic like this for every day of the month that's insane 🖤

The muichiro tiktok 🥺 hes not talked about alot but I would actually die a little if something happened to him he needs to be protected ❤

ME AND YOU ARE ON THE SAME WAVELENGTH I SWEAR I HAD THAT GIYU TIKTOK SAVED TO SEND YOU LOL. I literally have a folder of tiktoks to send you and that was one of them where like the second I saw it I was like I neeeed to send this to doll lol

Also I could not be more devastated it says the dabi tiktok you sent isn't available I WAS SO EXCITED 😭

Dio and kars I'm sorry the absolute TIDDIES on these men?? Say less I'm interested lmaoo

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRDw3VLb/?k=1 I genuinely cant remember if I sent this one already but it's mahito so I'm sure you won't mind lol

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRuN7cD6/ LMAO why is this so accurate

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRuFYSN4/ THERE IS NO REASON THEY HAD TO MAKE HIM THAT SEXY LIKE THE ANGLE??

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRuNcTcK/ I have so many enmu tiktoks it's not even funny

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRuF14fJ/

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRuNvAfs/ AH 👀

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRuNTyJ4/ YOUR BOY!!

https://youtu.be/_iS_tWePxIU so this is the shigaraki scene pack sorry it's so long you dont have to watch all of it lol

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRuNnk53/ also here's some tiktoks of him, hes so pretty in like a gross feral way lol 😍

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRuNoEbj/

As for dabi I couldn't pick between these three lol but they're shorter

https://youtu.be/oA3bPkLqJ88

https://youtu.be/ySRNm-Rg-Eo

https://youtu.be/_heVfb7XKDU

THIS IS SO LONG AHH I just had so much to tell you 😘

HHH OKAY THIS HAS TAKEN ME SO LONG TO REPLY TO BUT I WANTED TO MAKE SURE I COVERED EVERYTHING YOU DID

the movie was SO SO good I’m actually going to rewatch it sometime this weekend just because TOGE MY ANGEL. you said it best, I’m so happy they showed more of his ability. HES SO POWERFUL ITS CRAZY ?? Maki was way too sexy I have SUCH a crush on her !!!

YES I AM COMPLETELY CAUGHT UP ON DEMON SLAYER !! Enmu is so !!!! But that’s to be expected because he’s voice by the same guy that does Laito from diabolik lovers AND kakyoin from jojo LIKE OBVIOUSLY IM GOING TO BE IN LOVE WITH HIM

My top three are Kokushibo, Douma, and Akaza !! ❤️ BUT GYUTARO GRABBED ME BY THE THROAT WHEN HE SHOWED UP HIS VOIIICCEEE WAS SO SEXY. As for his voice actor is concerned, my bestie looked it up! I only know him from deadman wonderland and attack on Titan but his voice as GYUTARO was so unique I didn’t even recognize it KDKSKSK

THE DABI TIKTOK WAS UNAVAILABLE ??? NOOOO 😭😭😭

PLEASE I REALLy hOPE YOU LIKE THE KINKTOBER FICS, I sorry I couldn’t finish all of them 🥺 but I’m really interested in hearing your thoughts on the demon slayer ones too!!

I CANT BELIEVE YIU HAVE A WHOLE FOLDER OF TIKTOKS JUST TO SEND TO ME IM SO HONORED 😭😭 MY LIKES ARE SO DISORGANIZED IF I EVER SEND ANY TO YOU THAT YOUVE ALREADY SEEN JUST TELL ME LMAO

** I CANT WAIT TO HEAR WHAT YOU THINK IF YOU START JOJO FEEL FREE TO SPAM MY INBOX WITH YOUR REACTIONS OMG THERES SO MANY BEEFY MEN**

okay… I am watching the scene packs first !!

OMG THIS SHIGARAKI GIY IS SOOOOO CUTE I WANT TO GIVE HIM KISSES?? I think he’s the one I’ve clowned in my group chat abt desperately needing some chapstick 🤧 BUT FROM WHAT I SAW HES BABY HES LITTLE MEOW MEOW

THE DABI PACCCKKKK OMG his quirk ( that’s what y’all call it right?? The POWER ) IS SO DOPE THE BLUE FLAMES THE BLUE EYES MY LEGS ARE WIDE OPEN FOR HIM — also I could LITRALLY listen to him talk all day. Imagine how husky his dirty talk is what if I screamed. out lOud. okay maybe your man grabbed me by the throat 😩 I didn’t get to finish all of the videos bcause I have taken wayy too long to answer this BUT AFTER WORK I WILL BE GOING BACK AND WATCHING THE REST KF THEM TO MAKE SURE I SEE EVERY MOMENT 💕💕💕

TIKTOK TIMEEE OMG I ABSOLUTELY LOVE BEING FEDDD

“Do you want me to stay” “NO” VRYING ALL MAHITO WANTED WAS TO BE FRIENDS WITH SUKUNA

AKAZAAAA MY SEXY MAN IM SCREAMING RIPPING MY FINGERNAILS OFFFF I LOVE HIM

ENMU GIVE ME KISS CHALLLLENGEEEE OMG HES TOO PRETTY

LEVI IS THE FAVORITE BOY WE LOVE LOVE LOVE TO SEE IT he truly deserves it 😭😭💕

The shigaraki tiktok

What if I came on myself WAT THEN

I HAVE A COUPLE OF TIKTOKS TO GIVE YOU MY LOVE IM SORRY IF YOUVE ALREADY SEEN IT but I haven’t been on the app that much recently NEXT TIME I PROMISE ILL HAVE MORE

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTR9mQUG4/

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTR9mcrvf/

[ratcandy]

hi MASSIVE TOH SEASON 3 EPISODE 1 SPOILERS below don't read if haven't watched I am about to go off my rocker

also abuse tw mention because 😦

first of all FLAPJACK. I proceed to punch a wall

I did not expect to actually start bawling my eyes out but hot damn what the fuck . Why is Flapjack dying what got me above everything else in this show. Like I've gotten teary and emotional over other moments but Flapjack dying and all of Hunter's dialogue that proceeded it just made me SOB ??????????????

Also hello fluid as fuck animation in that fight scene 😳 i misse d you

so anyway. Now we gotta talk about possessed!Hunter right. While that's a bombass design and I love the look of it and his body language in the fluid parts of the animation is impeccable, it's also incredibly. URGH. NO I don't LIKE it. No I HATE it, actually. There's something just . Incomprehensibly genuinely upsetting about Hunter's former abuser taking over his body and using it to kill his emotional support animal

it's SO fucked up and I'm all for horrible twisted shit but also for fuck's sake man can Hunter get a fucking break!!! Can he like!!! Be free for two minutes!!!!!

I think it just feels like such a consecutive gut punch because we're missing so much extra filler and that's what makes me all the more sad. You can TELL you can TASTE how much more they wanted to expand on this, how much more there was to elaborate on, but they just didn't have the time and so Hunter Really Going Thru It yet again just feels like . got dam he really did not get a single break my guy can't even REST!!! it feels to me like he's just constantly through the ringer because it's all we've been able to see and that SUCKS

but they make a whole point of saying he has been happier in the human realm ("you've smiled so much since we got here" from Gus, something along those lines) . They want us to know he Has been happy for the past few months, there HAS been a break. n I feel like that was their way of trying to say ,,, Look See he's been at semi-sorta-peace for a little while! He's gone without Unspeakable Horrors for like a FEW MONTHS , we promise, we swear, it's not consecutive unending pain, he's been Pretty Good for a while (ignoring identity crises that we also unfortunately can't elaborate on because of time but you saw a little glimpse of it in that intro sequence). and NOW we're just making him Worse

but still like AUUGHhghsgghh. I don't Like the further implications of Any of the possession stuff mannnnn ughurhghgrh

AND ALSO FLAPJACK i punch the wall again FUCK!!!

anyway expanding on Flapjack a little . So when Belos did his whole fucking thing, he said "goodbye Evalyn," and we see during the whole Hayride sequence that Evalyn gave Caleb Flapjack (or taught him to make Flapjack).

For a moment, though, I was mortified misunderstanding that Flapjack was Evalyn, even if that wouldn't make any sense ghsdgkJHSDG

oh also we know Evalyn's name now. Yea that's a thing. We know the name of the witch that Caleb fell in love with or whatever. And honestly. I had to stop after I heard that and go "aawww maaan" because. C'mon. looks at the camera

Evalyn? Edalyn? Not even Tryin to hide that they're related huh

Mngmrh this is a personal gripe of mine, but honestly I really hoped the theory about "the witch Caleb loved being an ancestor of the Clawthorne's" wasn't canon sdhgkh it just . Again this is personal bias. I have never liked the cliché of "you've been related this whole time!" kinda thing. Different when the antagonist and protagonist are set up as related from the start. I don't like when it's a plot twist or anything like that. it's so. m.

just not really my thing n I'm a little disappointed to get lowkey confirmation that it's probably canon sdghskjdghsdghkl because almost inevitably it'll be revealed in a whole dramatic thing and it'll be like RelATed TO BEloS THIS WHOle Time ?!? !? and i'll be like I Do Not See It

Well all that aside. Holds Camila in my hands. mom of the year award you deserve the entire world

[waywardscorpio]

His Queen & Her King

Taglist: @callmekda @braunstrowmangirl @phoenixoffiretwo @luna-loo @scuzmunkie @fanfiction-san​ @superdakotawinchesterus​

Chapter 2

Warnings: Cursing, Violence, Pissed off Jeff, Readers Dad Triple H, Godfather Shawn Michaels and Uncles Kane and Undertaker, Pregnant!Reader kidnapped.

*Third Person POV*

*A month after the road trip and Jeff, putting another bundle of joy inside his mate*

Y/N was walking through the hallway of the arena while she had one hand on her belly and the other carrying her bag of food and drink. Her baby belly was a little more noticeable now. "Hey Y/N" Undertaker said. "Hey, Uncle Taker." She said looking up at him. "How are you doing?" She asked. "I'm doing fine. How are you and the little ones doing?" She looked up at him confused; because she thought she was only pregnant with one. "The doctor only said, one baby." She said softly. "You don't know do you?" He asked her. "Know what?" She asked. "You're a very rare type of human omega that can get pregnant even though you're already pregnant. It isn't dangerous to you or the babies. But it will put you in danger. Some Alpha's will do whatever it takes to have you and that includes holding you captive and breeding you to make soldiers or a small army" He said. He's older than some people actually know. "But I won't let any harm you." Taker said to her before walking down the hallway.

Y/N, let the words from Undertaker go around and around in her head as she walks to Jeff's locker room. "Hey, Babe." He replied as she walked into the room. "Hey, Darlin'," Y/N replied back to her as she was looking at him from across the room. "We need to have a talk tonight after work." She said to him as she looks at him. "Are you okay? Is the baby hurt? What is wrong?" Jeff said standing up and moving swiftly towards his love. "I am okay. The baby is okay. We just need to talk. I'm not leaving you before you even ask that question next." She said as she looks up at him rubbing his cheek. Jeff relaxed into her soft gentle touch.

"I think you should stay near Undertaker for my match. I have a feeling something is off and it gonna get ugly tonight." Jeff said getting an unsettling feeling that something isn't bad is going to happen and Jeff trusted Undertaker with Y/N's life more than anyone besides her parents. "But I'm supposed to go out there with you tonight Baby," Y/N said to him as she looked at him. "I know Babe, I want you to go out there too. But I have an uneasy feeling that something is going to happen tonight and I don't want you getting in the line of fire or our baby." Jeff said walking to her and carefully rubbing her belly. "Alright, I'll stay by Undertaker tonight." She said looking up at him.

Jeff walked Y/N to where Undertaker was at so, he knew she made it there safely and unharmed. "Hey Taker. Is it okay that she stays with you? I have an uneasy feeling that something is going to happen." He said looking at the taller male. "Yes, she is more than welcome." He said as he looks at a very reluctant Y/N. "As soon as my fight is over Baby, I will be right back here before going anywhere else." He said kissing her lips gently rubbing her cheek and her belly. "Please be careful out there tonight" She said resting her head against his chest. "I will Baby." Jeff said promising the love of his life he would be careful.

Jeff, walked out to the ring getting ready to fight tonight. "This match will be turned into 4 on 4 tag team match. It will be Jeff, Matt, Triple H and Shawn Michaels Vs Edge, Christian, Sheamus and Finn Balor." Lillian announce to the crowd and viewers at home to hear. Y/N's head shot up looking at the tv wide eyes. "No, that wasn't the match he was supposed to be in. Who changed it?" She exclaims looking up at Taker who grabs her hand and heading towards Stephanie's office. "Momma, Dad can't fight and Uncle Shawn can't either." Y/N held her belly on instinct. "I tried to stop the match before it was made. Someone changed it before consulting with us first. Nothing I can do to change it." Steph was furious that someone did this and was about to rip someone a new asshole. "Uncle Taker and Kane please take Daddy's and Uncle Shawn places. They can't fight and the person knows that. They'll be at a disadvantage." She pleads at the two males. Kane looks at Undertaker. "I'll fight tonight." Taker was having a internal battle with himself because he told Jeff, Y/N wouldn't leave his side till the match was over. "Please Uncle Taker" Y/N began to cry in desperation. "Okay Lil One. I will do it. But on the condition you stay by your mother at all times no mater what. Jeff will just have to understand." He said walking out with Kane, and heading to the ring. "I promise" She called out. She hugged her mother tightly. "I got you Baby Girl" She said hushing her Childs cries.

Lightening rang through the arena as Takers music came on and fire surrounds the ring. Jeff sees Kane and Undertaker walking down the ramp. "I have been informed that Triple H and Shawn, will be taken out the match and Undertaker and Kane will be put into the match instead." Lillian announce but silently sighs in relief. "Y/N is supposed to be with you" Jeff said to Taker quietly. "Calm Jeff. She begged us to come out because she knew you'd be at a disadvantage since her Daddy Triple H and uncle Shawn are still healing from two weeks ago. She didn't want you guys to take a chance yourselves considering you two have a tag team title match coming at WrestleMania." Kane said. "I much rather my pregnant mate be safe than myself." Jeff said. Kane and Taker understood his point but also couldn't leave their fellow wrestlers defenseless. "She is safe I promise you. She is with her mother and her momma's ready to rip someone a new Asshole." Undertaker said to him.

Jeff didn't fight with the older man. He knew Y/N, was safe either way. As the match got started Matt and Edge started it off. They didn't hold back on each other either. Lefts and rights were thrown hard and on purpose. "Come on Matt" Kane holler holding his hand out for Matt to tag him in. Matt kicked him Edge in the ribs which gave him the leverage he needed to get away from him so he can tag in Kane. Kane steps over the ropes and started hitting Edge with right, Lefts and wasn't giving him any breathing room. Edge uppercuts Kane when he gets the chance which stuns him and Edge is able to tag in Balor. He has a advantage for a few seconds before Jeff was tagged in and went to town on Balor. Jeff was letting his anger out on his opponent. "You got this Jeff come on" Matt said cheering on his brother. Jeff had twisted his arm behind him and leads him to his corner to tag in the Undertaker.

The match was drawing to a end when Undertaker was tagged back in. He hit Christian with the Tombstone Piledriver and with a count of three Jeff and the others got in the ring raising the Undertakers hand who won them the match. After the mini celebration in the ring everyone walked out. Edge stops Jeff to give him a message. "Hey look I know we aren't the best of friends but I wanna let you know that I saw someone watching your car earlier after you guys got here and someone was following Y/N. It is someone new because I don't know the persons face or scent." Edge said. "Thank you, Edge. I have an uneasy feeling tonight's not over with. whoever made this match done it on purpose but didn't expect Kane and Undertaker to step in." Jeff said to him. "Lita has been uneasy all night worried saying they're coming but didn't get to see their faces when she had a vision. Just be safe." Edge said before walking over to Lita. Jeff mouths a thank you to her. She only nodded her head in response.

Jeff walked to his mother-n-laws office and walked in. "Hey Baby. How are you and the baby?" Jeff asked his mate as he rubbed her back and belly knowing she is tired. "We are perfect. Just tired. How much longer till we can go home?" She asks her mate. "We will be staying with someone for a while. Just got a message from a friend that someone has been watching us and following." Jeff said to Y/N. She whimpered a little in fear. "What?" They heard Steph say. "Baby go get your stuff while I talk to your mom and dad okay?" She nods her head softly. Undertaker was in ear lengths and stayed near her walking her to the dressing room to get her things while Jeff talked to her parents. "Edge stopped me after the match to let me know that people have been following me and Y/N since we been here, and that the scent is unfamiliar and not known around here. He also mentioned Lita had a vision that someone is coming but she couldn't see their faces." Jeff said to Triple H and Steph. "Why are they after you or her or both of you?" Steph asked. "I don't know but I think is has something to do with her being pregnant by me." He said to her. "Whatever it takes you protect her, you here me?" Triple H said to him. "Yes Sir. I'll give my last breath to protect her if that's what it take for her to live." Jeff said unknowing that that statement was about to be put to the test.

While Jeff is taking to Steph and Triple H, Y/N is getting her stuff ready to go when the lights in the building suddenly shut off and came back on. In a blink of an eye Y/N was gone. Jeff ran down the hallway to his dressing room. "Holy hell. Taker are you good?" Jeff asked helping him up. "I was hit over the head after the lights went out. When they came back on she was gone." He said to Jeff, holding the back of his head. "It is newbies trying to rise up through the business so, their going after one of the top dogs here. Y/N's going to be their pawn to use as an advantage. They know no, one will do anything to harm her but they know you will go looking for her. If it comes down to it they'll do unspeakable things to her. Especially since they know she is able to get pregnant multiple times at once. She is a Human Omega it is rare for ones like her to be able to carry more than one baby at a time." Undertaker said to Jeff. Jeff paces thinking at what way he can approach this with out his Omega Mate getting hurt. "Jeff you aren't in this alone." Shawn said walking in the room with Kane, walking over to his brother and checking the back of his head. "We will fight with you over her" Triple H said. "Just be ready for a battle to start." Steph said.

"The battle started the minute the took her." Jeff said calm and deadly. Steph smiled to her husband knowing they picked a good man for their daughter. Jeff walked out to the ring and grabbed a mic. He was careful and tactical with his words even with how angry he was. He won't give the kidnappers the satisfaction to see his pain because once he does they have the power. "You come here" He said to a camera man. "Sir?" he said stepping in the ring with Jeff. "I want you to tape this live." He said. The male nods his head in fear sensing the anger and absolute power dripping off the man. He put the cam on his shoulder and began to tape. "I hope you sick fuckers are listening. You think it was wise for you take a mans pregnant mate. Especially a dangerous man like me who will stop at nothing to get her back. You wanted a battle? A battle you can't possibly come out standing on top. We will see who is left standing when I am done with you because you opened the gates of hell and stepped into my cage!!!" He said looking into the cam. "I won't be alone when I get my hands on you."

"Just know if she has so much as a scratch on her.. Well I show just how sadistic I am when I'm provoked or pushed." Jeff said. "Oh one more thing. Y/N Darlin' I'm coming for you." He adds. She heard her Alpha on the tv and she smiles to herself knowing the men that took her are about to know why Jeff is one of the most feared men in the Wwe besides Undertaker and Kane. "What are you smiling about whore?" One said. "You fucked up. You'll see just what he is going to do to you

[diamondcitydarlin]

It should also be noted that Kate used Loki's genderfluidity as a constant hype train and advertising platform. Remember, there were just constant interviews/posts/articles about the show taking a massive step forward in the realms of trans representation, and then you watch and the show aaaaand...

sex: fluid

But you'd still see articles of the director patting herself on the back for bravely spoon-feeding the trans community this somehow groundbreaking advancement that also never manifested itself in any way.

She only stopped a while after the show ended when people realised she'd been blowing hot air the entire time and not only didn't do anything she promised in that regard, but never meant to.

I'll always be joyous for bisexual Loki, but I'll also never forget she used her getting him bisexual mainstream as a 'so you'll trust me when I make all these genderfluid promises too, right? You'll promise to watch the show, right?'

She did worse than queerbait in the end. She used the entire trans umbrella community as an advertising pick-me-up and as a trans guy miserable enough to still be here boy have the terfs recognised it too.

I remember, yes, and while my disgust with all of this exists and continues to grow stronger the more I hear, I will never know what it means to be excluded, appropriated and exploited in this way so I really appreciate you sharing this with me.

I've been mentioning this on my various flows of consciousness that I post here insofar as what it means for queer shipping, but the capitalist exploitation of queer identity is absolutely a problem across the board in mainstream entertainment. The corporations behind these productions are seeing a benefit in acknowledging queer identity and stories, specifically doing so with as little substance as possible.

In the case of Loki I don't necessarily fault the fans/viewers/public that got excited about the hint to Loki's gender maybe being more openly fluid in expression going forward (p sure if you carbondate my posts you'll see I was one of them lmao), or those of us that got excited about him confirming his attraction to more than one gender ('the bit of both' is still...a thing but that's another post). Because it was ultimately supposed to be more than that, right? These were meant to be the start of a character journey into an openly queer experience and it was only after Disney/Marvel/the creators collected all the accolades that it became clear that was literally going to be it. Boom bam we did that and now that's over and we can go back to writing for a cishet white male audience uwu

So yes, queer exploitation is absolutely a thing regardless of how ignorant corporations pretend to be about what they're intentionally, knowingly doing and they benefit from engaging writers/directors etc that also have their own self-centered motivations and won't be pushing too hard for the "difficult stuff".

And you know, all of this aside, it'd be one thing if Kate had genuinely believed she was doing a great thing at the time out of honest ignorance and THEN chose to listen to and amplify genderfluid/trans voices correcting that assumption and giving reasons as to why it failed. Because I get it, I can be dumb about this stuff too and it's important to acknowledge that so I can keep learning. (she also could have avoided the whole thing by fighting to have genderfluid/trans writers on the team but I digress)

In general, the casual comfort a lot of people have with being transphobic and disregarding trans/gf voices these days makes me physically ill. It is unspeakably cruel, and I am so sorry that it keeps happening again. And again. And again.

For what it's worth, none of you are alone in this fight even though I know it must feel like it a lot of the time. You have allies and those who care about your experiences and want to prioritize them, myself included, and I hope you will continue feeling safe on this blog anyway to be open with me about how the trans/fluidphobia in the show made you feel, how it could have been done better, how it SHOULD have been done better, how we as a fandom can craft our stories and headcanons to best incorporate this facet of Loki's character

[ilove-cedricdiggory]

You would be okay (Fallen Pt. 2)

Draco x Reader

Request - Yes? kinda? you guys wanted a part 2!

Summary - You tried the unspeakable and were left with this aftermath. Part one here!

Trigger Warning - Mentions of suicide, suicidal thoughts, cursing, it's kinda lengthy. I hope you enjoy!

All that's left is a last embrace.

All that's left is a whisper to say.

Hearts broken,

tears spilled,

frantic moves,

for all that was left was a final exhale.

You expected white, or maybe black even? But all you saw was the yellow of a light. That's a good sign, right?

Go into the light.

But, the light doesn't come with a tight embrace, does it?

For the last of something shouldn't come with another. A last breath shouldn't be met with another inhale, filling your lungs with a type of pain that wasn't physical. A type of pain that filled your head with the doubt of no other.

You failed.

Failed to die, how can someone be that stupid?

"No." You croaked out, feeling the pressure on your body tighten. "No, I'm not alive. No." You opened your eyes, the unshed tears already in the place of your eyelids.

"Honey, clear the room." The soft, warm voice of the mother you dreamed of filled your ears. "Molly, no." You cried, looking up at her. She held your body tightly, her arms circled around you as she held the life of you, afraid to let go.

The tears fell quickly down your cheeks, sobs falling from your mouth. "Sweet girl, it's okay." She whispered, pressing you closer to her. You're unaware of how you long you sobbed, how long she sat there with you, softly pressing her palm down the smoothness of your hair, but your sobs lulled you back to sleep with the hatred of yourself filling your being once more.

One week

You felt like you were a toddler again, for a pair of eyes was always set on you. They didn't look at you with pity, they didn't look at you with disgust, they didn't look at you with doubtfulness. For they looked at you with a love you didn't even understand. A love that had your heart breaking worse than what Draco could ever cause.

You still weren't sure how you survived, how you possibly could have jumped from the astronomy tower and lived to tell the tale, but none of the Weasley's would tell you.

"It doesn't matter dear." Whispered Molly when you woke up the next morning, full of questions.

"What do you think about these?" Fred and George switched up the topic, showing you a prototype that was supposed to shoot multicolored glitter into the room you tossed it into.

"Sorry, y/n, I'm reading." Hermione excused, sticking her nose further into her book, avoiding your eyes with every cost.

Three Weeks

With each day, you ate more. With each second, you smiled brighter. With each look, you felt safer.

You weren't on watch like you had been, everyone seeing the slow progress you were making. You still had unanswered questions, but they sat at the back of your mind, until a bad day.

A day that had you tumbling down the steep stairs of progress, a day that had you quivering in fear of your own self. A day that started with a specific blonde.

You had assumed he was at the Malfoy Manner, you had assumed he thought you were dead. But, when you opened the door to your apartment, Hermione and Ginny standing beside you, he stood from your couch, eyes set on you.

"You're okay." He whispered, his eyes as broken as yours.

"Shit." Ginny looked at the Slytherin and quickly stepped in front of you. "Why the fuck are you here?" Hermione asked, pulling you back behind her.

"Look, I just - I had to make sure she was okay. I haven't left for weeks, I've slept on the couch to make sure I'd see you when you walked in. I - after I saved you, I saw the Weasleys running to you, I was too afraid they'd kill me themselves, so I ran off." He said, stepping closer to you. "Wait - you're the one who saved her?" Ginny asked, looking at the boy. "I uh, I levitated her - like Dumbledore did to Harry at the quidditch game year three. As soon as the owl flew in with a letter in your handwriting to me, after that fight, I knew what you were doing."

Ginny took one more step towards the boy before hugging him, her arms around his neck. "Thank you."

You and Hermione stood in awe. Ginny Weasley, the Ginny Weasley, was hugging Draco. They had all learned to tolerate the man, especially after the two of you got together, but the only person you ever saw try to hug Draco, was Molly.

"But, how did you know where I was? I wrote that at the end of the letter so I could - well, so I could die." You whispered, moving to sit on the couch

Hermione moved to sir next to you, taking the seat Draco might have taken, placing her hand on yours. "Y/n, we don't have to do this. We just came for some clothes." You shook your head, meeting Draco's red eyes.

"I found the letters, about 4 months ago. I had gone into the owl room to feed her the two days you were gone and I saw it with my name. I pulled it out and read it - I didn't know what to do. We had been doing well, you were happy, we had plans with the Weasley's, which I knew for a fact you wouldn't cancel, I just decided to watch you for the next few weeks, make sure you were okay. I knew that you were depressed a while ago, but we had been working on it.

You had been getting out of bed a bit easier, you were baking and singing, I figured you were okay. I know your depression comes and goes, but you were really doing good, so I didn't bring it up." He sat in your love seat, his head in his hands. "I was such an idiot for not bringing it up, I knew better than that. Even if you were doing good, you still wrote them, which meant you were suicidal before then. I'm just a plain dick for saying what I said to you then too. I - I can't believe that I did, you trusted me with your insecurities, with your darkest thoughts, and I used then to crush you." His voice was soft, tears falling from his eyes.

"Hey, Mione, let's go pack up some stuff for Y/n, I think they should talk."

Two months

You were okay.

It was still hard sometimes, but you were okay. You had moved back in to your home, finding a new routine for you. Someone of the Weasley house always popped in on you once a week and Molly set in a Sunday Dinner policy that you could not miss.

You were okay.

You still had dark thoughts, but who didn't? You still had rough days, but who didn't? The only thing you didn't have, was him.

After the day he told you how he saved you, he left. He excused himself when the girls came back, and he left. You were expecting to see him, to hear from him, but nothing. Now, your heart broke a little bit when you woke up and his side was empty, when you woke up and his coffee cup was gone, when you woke up and his designated seat stayed empty.

But, he wasn't going to kill you again.

You washed dishes, you baked cookies (and owled them to the Weasley's), and you went to work.

You were okay.

The day was long, almost as hard as it used to be, but you could do it. People came and went, your mood stayed stable, and your mind stayed blank from all thoughts that could break you.

You were okay.

Right at clock out, you stepped out of the store and - no one.

You walked down the street and - no one.

You stepped into the bakery the two of you got breakfast from that morning and - oh? maybe? the blonde hair, the same height? Nope, bakers son.

A simple hot chocolate, not wanting to be up for hours more, and you were headed home. The muggle tv was set up, courteously done by Harry and Arthur. The hours passed by, your own platter of cookies gone, but, you ate. Comedy movies watched, an episode of How I Met Your Mother finished, but you were then met with a stupid romance movie.

Your eyes watered as you stood, walking to the fridge to find - no ice cream? Really? You bought 4 pints of it the last time you saw it, it was just so hard to find in stores.

You glanced down at your clothes and shrugged, disapparating into the streets outside of the grocery store before walking in and straight to the frozen section. "Stupid freaking ice cream just had to be ate by me. Why can't they make self filling ice cream? I'd pay any damn price for that." You mumbled, the house shoes dragging along as you walked.

"Where is it?" You asked yourself, glancing in each of the doors before bumping into a cart. "Oh, crap, I'm sorry." You spoke, looking up to meet them.

"Narcissa?" You asked, your eyes furrowing. You glanced into her basket to see nothing but ice cream, the very ice cream you were here for. "Uh, that's a lot of ice cream." You said, biting your lip sadly.

"Draco sent me for them, I don't eat ice cream." She laughed, smiling at the girl. "You okay?" She asked softly, meeting your eyes. You had a problem with Lucius, yes, but Narcissa was so lovely - especially after the war. "I'm okay." You spoke, nodding once.

"You know, I said that a lot too, so I get it." You bit your lip, nodding once. "Oh, well, they don't have what I'm here for, so I'll be going." She nodded, you turning around before hurrying out of the store.

You were okay.

You popped back into your home, taking a deep breath. You sat in the room, shutting off the TV before laying back. An hour later, you were met with the pecking of the door, sighing as you grabbed a few knuts for the owl and walked to the door, swinging it open.

"Draco?" You breathed out, looking at the man. "Owl?" you asked, looking down at the owl in his arms.

"I uh, I figured I'd bring you these." He held up the ice cream pints his mother bought, smiling softly. "I was gonna owl them, but I had to see you, I'm sorry." He spoke, and you stepped aside to let the boy in.

After they were all safely placed in the freezer, he turned to you. "Y/n, I'm so so so sorry. I can't just apologise my way back into your life and I know that, but I'd do anything to see you. I was such an absolute idiot and I will do anything I can do to fix it, fix us." He spoke, his eyes meeting yours.

You nodded softly, taking a deep breath.

You were okay.

You were okay.

You were okay.

You weren't okay.

"I've missed you do much." you cried, flopping onto the couch. "And I hate myself for that because you did this, you did it. But you're the only one I could ever trust to really fix me again. But I can't trust you to not break me again." Your sobs filled the air, Draco rushing to hold you once again.

"I'm so sorry, y/n." he whispered, kissing your head softly.

You stayed in his arms until your sobs lulled to an end, looking up at him. "We have to restart." You whispered, looking into his beautiful eyes. "Not just pick up where we left off, restart." He nodded, his eyes bright with hope.

"Well then, y/n, can I take you out on a ice cream date?" He asked softly, pushing your hair back. "I dunno, I've got all the ice cream I can take, this really great guy bought it for me." You spoke, smiling at him.

"Yeah, but you look like a soft serve kinda girl."

You were going to be okay.

~~~

Tag List - @m3ssytrash @drawwithaarya @memorable-fics @gdee703

If you'd like to be on my tag list permanently or for a specific Character, pm me

[magnusgoetia]

Transcript of a Sinner’s Conversation: A Meeting with Caecus

--Begin (In Medias Res)--

Sinner: You kiddin'? Dyin' was the best thing that's ever happened to me.

Caecus: There’s nothing you left behind? No family to miss?

Sinner: My family? Fuck 'em, I'd ‘ave hired 'elp to kill 'em already if it meant they'd be dead-dead, and I wouldn't have to spend time wiv 'em down 'ere. It wouldn't be right for me to force this on my friends either, but they'll be 'ere in due time anyway. I can wait.

Caecus: So, you’re expecting your friends to join you here as well. The wait must be awfully lonely.

Sinner: Ah, not really. I’ve made friends while I’m ‘ere. The shit I can do ‘ere is like, fucking magic and with it I can make up for what I lack in a lot of different ways. Just wish I could remember how I ‘ad died.

Caecus: Maybe it’s better not to remember… Not all of us intended to be here, after all.

Sinner: No. No, perhaps it’s best not to remember. I quickly found out that it's not just evil folks that end up here, lots of good folks, plenty of weird ones too. I'm sensing you’re of the “gooder” ones, you radiate...well, it’s 'ard to describe, but I don't sense any hostility from you at the very least, even though you were born ‘ere.

Caecus: How amiable of you. But remember, a birth is just a new beginning of sorts. You couldn’t have been alone since you were… delivered to us.

Sinner: Ah, you’re a poetic type aren’t ya? Anyway, I’ve not made many friends but I do ‘ave a particular fondness for this one clown...me an' 'im seem to 'ave this weird connection wiv each other. Actually, he's more of a jester type, though rather embarrassingly his name escapes me...

Caecus: Are you, by chance, referring to an imp named Blocko?

Sinner: Yeah, don’t surprise me you know ‘im. He seems like the type to ‘ave a particular reputation.

Caecus: That he does, and yet a divine will connects us. I’m being led to believe your intriguing appearance has an even more… intriguing history.

Sinner: Riiiight...Well, you know what they say about skeletons and closets. Though I suppose I ‘ave nothing to hide ‘ere...Well, to put it simply, I was a broken kid. I never got help, and I did... unspeakable things to anyone who ‘ad wronged me—or simply didn't like.

Caecus: Even the purest of souls can be corrupted by another’s sins.

Sinner: Yeah...Well, it's not like I'll stop doin’ what I did while I was alive, with all that murder and hedonism. Though death has a way of humbling some people...In any case, the murders mostly stopped as I grew older. I seemed to have preferred to just traumatise people instead, ruin lives of the people I saw as bad or evil.

Caecus: Then you found a different punishment for those you had judged.

Sinner: I suppose so. A lot of it involved me spying on groups of people. I'd worm my way into the seedy societies that thought they were safe in their little circles and collect dirt on them. Really sick shit too by the way but don’t worry, the hypocrisy wasn’t lost on me either.

Caecus: Oh? You judged yourself a hypocrite yet continued along a path of self-appointed righteousness... Why?

Sinner: I don’t know, maybe a sense of catharsis? A lot of these were people who I wouldn’t have to feel guilty about killing or whatever. Sometimes it was more personal too, there were—still are people I am attached to up there that got hurt, and I took my revenge on them in their place.

Caecus: Ahh, how noble. Fighting for your friends.

Sinner: Yeah, there was this one particular bastard. Actually, there were a few…but…eh, nevermind…this one particular guy who was essentially lying to one of these “friends” and caused them a psychotic breakdown. I didn’t take action right away, but I did end up killing ‘im. Didn’t even bother hiding the fact it was a murder.

Caecus: What made you wait?

Sinner: Money, mostly. It makes the world up there spin, and you need a lot of it to get anything done, right? Well, I ‘ad to wait until I ‘ad enough money to fly to the states on top of all that shit involved in immigratin’. When I settled in, that’s when I made my move on a buncha grudges. This guy was just the first. Moving to the states made my life a lot easier in some ways. Was a lot easier to sleep when I took care of the grudges too.

Caecus: Oh, wow. You must have had remarkable resolve to keep a “grudge” that long… Tell me, did all of them truly deserve it?

Sinner: No, most didn’t, but I am…was, an angry person. I found I was very much capable of venting my anger, to put it mildly, and I was much too young when I had...shall we say...discovered it.

Caecus: Young minds are impressionable.

Sinner: Right, and the fact that I was generally good at getting away with it made me feel just that little bit better about it.

Caecus: So, you exploited that validation to continue justifying your actions. Most sinners in your position never reach awareness...

Sinner: Yeah? I’ll take that as a compliment, but I was totally emotionally disconnected when committing my crimes. Afterwards I pretty much always dealt with conflict. Cognitive dissonance is a bitch. Though I had largely stopped my ways. I’m ‘aving way too much fun down ‘ere, and even though I won’t drag ‘em down here with me, I’d love to have my friends join me eventually.

Caecus: Would they be pleased being here, embrace this existence like you have?

Sinner: I dunno, some of them have a hard enough time as it is with one existence, I doubt they’ll be too happy to find out there’s another waitin’ for ‘em. The others I’d imagine would be quite surprised all the same, being atheists and such, but I reckon they’d come to like it.

Caecus: An existence you cannot escape is itself a prison. Albeit, choosing to enjoy it in spite of that perspective is a marvelous thing. If you could imagine them in your presence, what would you do?

Sinner: Again, I dunno. It’s hard to tell when they’re not here yet but I am somewhat interested in what’ll end up happening should they get here. I dunno if I’ll be able to tell if it’s them even.

Caecus: And how do you dare to enjoy existence now?

Sinner: Well, I’ve been doing everything I’ve ever wanted to do but could never do in life amongst other things. It’s kinda embarrassing, but I played a bunch of video games, so I miss those quite a bit. I’ve found plenty of ways to fill that void though. Some of your movies are pretty sick down ‘ere, and importing goods from the other rings to ‘ere means I don’t miss out…mostly, on their fun too. I just wish I could explore the other rings; I don’t get why us sinners can’t.

Caecus: Decretum is often difficult to understand. However, it would seem a blessing that you’ve been placed with the multifarious company of the pride ring.

Sinner: True enough, whatever that means. There’s a lot of strip clubs, greedy businesses and shit, stuff you think you’d only find in the other rings. Though I think I probably would’ve ended up in wrath if we landed in the rings based on our sins.

Caecus: Most catechisms view wrath as an excessive anger. You strike me as having more control than the average sinner.

Sinner: A lot of people on the surface woulda said the same too, I was and I suppose still am really good at keeping it in check, well, good enough to not make it obvious anyway. Though it’s been a lot tougher down here.

Caecus: This is a realm of collective temptation, after all.

Sinner: My only judge here is myself and perhaps my peers if I let them. I still kill down here, but it’s been in self-defence. I don’t think I’ve killed anyone out of anger yet but let’s just say I’d feel sorry for the poor sod who happened to piss me off on a bad day.

Caecus: You’ve always been your own judge. I suspect the lack of good comparisons for your behavior here has coaxed you further.

Sinner: Actually, I could tell you about the first person I “killed” down here. It was soon after I woke up. I suppose this guy thought it’d be easy—fresh sinner, just in time to be another tally mark on some statistic.

Caecus: A second death, the lake of fire…

Sinner: Uh...yeah, I reacted on instinct and it musta been a sort of “kiss of death” type shit. I only touched the dude with my hand, and he just kinda…shrivelled up and died. You know…like when a cartoon character eats a lemo—ah sorry, you can’t watch TV.

Caecus: Ah, yes… a shrivelling death is nevertheless descriptive.

Sinner: Anyway, I have a bunch of other powers too but that one I’m most afraid of you know? I can drop the ambient temperature of an area so shit gets cold, have some form of telekinesis and a buncha other stuff, like I have some kinda control over this weird glowy energy, it’s how I have my eyes, which are purely for show, I don’t need them since I can see perfectly fine without ‘em...not that you’d know I even have ‘em.

Caecus: I’m aware you observe our world, in a traditional sense. My observations are just a bit more… unorthodox. And I feel as if your fear is not from a lack of understanding.

Sinner: Well I seem to have it under control, but I’m afraid in a moment of weakness I might react without thinking, you know? I’ve not had it happen yet, but it would be so easy when flippin’ out that I just give ‘em the ol’ touch of death.

Caecus: Even a king’s heart is just a stream of water to the hand of… fate.

Sinner: Gonna be honest, I haven’t the foggiest of what you just said. Though if I’m being honest myself, I couldn’t care less if it was someone I didn’t know anyway. Only really care about my friends and such. You seem pretty neat yourself.

Caecus: The impression is mutual. It’s not often that I’m seen as anything other than senseless and intimidating. I don’t find it unwarranted, granted; my appearance is as disconcerting as my psyche.

Sinner: How do you even know what you look like? It’s not like you can just look into a mirror.

Caecus: I was presented with a vision soon before I arrived, my last blessing I suppose… Regardless, my rebirth is a tale for another time. I’ve relished in your company long enough, and I must answer my calling. I’m sure our paths will converge again.

Sinner: Hey, I hope so too...uh....

Caecus: Please, call me Caecus.

Sinner: Well, it’s only polite to give you my name too. I go by many names here, but I am quite fond of “Mr. Death” as silly as it sounds.

Caecus: Silly, yes, but very becoming of you. A pleasure, Mr. Death.

Mr. Death:Well, don’t let me keep you. I’d like to see you again sometime, Caecus. I’ll take my leave.

Caecus: All in due time.

--End--