#I'll include the puke in part 2!

[bellysoupset]

Could you do another seizure one with Vince teaching his senior class? Maybe he goes to get up from his desk and drops something which alerts the students that something is wrong right before it happens and one of them rush to get Max. I was thinking it could hit Max in the feels a bit considering he's developing feelings for the guy. Vomit included please.

If you don't want to do a seizure, maybe a faint instead. I was just thinking seizure since he's already had two.

Please!

Hi darling! I know you requested a seizure before, but I tend to avoid those, because in my head they signify something more serious or an underlying condition!

But.... You said fainting is alright? So let's go!

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There were new episodes of Wendy's favorite sitcom, so Vince had slept late since they were watching it together at distance. It was well past midnight when his overenergized bunny of a girlfriend started yawning and Vince was out like a lamp not even thirty seconds after they hung up the call.

So it was to no surprise when he slept in. He knew for a fact he had woken up with his alarm, because it showed it had been disabled, but he didn't remember doing it. Whatever, he was so late he had only time to brush his teeth, put some deodorant on and change into the first set of clothing he found.

"Oh, cute, you guys are sharing clothes now?" Sophia said in that mean tone of hers, that caused Vince to reflexive frown. He hadn't had time to eat during morning and was forced to use his lunch to prepare for the other classes - something he should've done the night before - so now he was feeling more than a little queasy.

"What?" Vince glared at her, as the rest of her classmates started to get in and settle in their place.

"Your outfit, pookie," Sophia's smile was huge in her face and Vince glanced down, only then realizing he was wearing Luke's tshirt. It was definitely tighter than one of his would've been and it had a pinup girl on the black fabric, with goth makeup on and holding a cigarette where the smoke turned into a skull.

"Ah," Vince whined, "I didn't have time to check..." how did his sister even know this was Luke's was beyond him, "go sit down."

He had one more class after Soph's and then he could go home and lie in bed until the weird woozy feeling vanished.

They were talking about the World War II and normally Vince would spend half the class doing a presentation on the topic and then spend the rest of it debating, he was proud of having an engaging class, no matter how much the students thought History was boring.

Today, though, he was feeling increasingly dizzy and his mouth kept filling up with bitter, thick saliva that he didn't seem quick enough to swallow, so Vince let go of his pride and put on Jojo Rabbit, a movie he thought they'd enjoy, and asked them to write an essay on it.

"If we don't finish it during the class I'll make it available online and-" he swallowed against the weird pressure in his throat. It wasn't exactly nausea, but it sure as hell wasn't pleasant. There were a bunch of colorful little dots, like glitter, shining over the student's heads, "and you can finish it at home. I want a thousand words on nationalism and how it's displayed in the movie..." this was easy enough, right? Vince rubbed at his temples, trying to string together what else he needed to tell them, "it's due next week-"

"Next week!" A girl cried out, "Mr. Monacelli, there's no time to do it for next week-"

Oh please, Vince frowned, gulping down what now was definitely nausea. He breathed slowly through his mouth, "What do you guys have next week?"

"Trig exam," a boy that Vince actually thought was a great student, Chris, answered, "can't it be for next next week?"

Whatever you guys want, was what Vince thought, but in reality he just nodded stiffly, "alright, but then I don't want anyone not delivering and saying they-" he braced slightly against his desk, "they didn't have the time. We got a deal?"

There was a general murmur of agreement and he sat back down, "Maggie, hit the lights, please?" he requested the girl sitting right next to the light switch, then pressed play in his laptop.

Movie days were the kid's favorite, as they hurdled together in their little cliques and started chuckling along the picture. Vince glanced up, seeing Sophia squeezed between two girls, with her head leaning on the shoulder of one of them. He couldn't care less about them pushing their chairs together and the cuddling, that was not his business.

Vince stared at the little clock in the corner of his desktop, watching the minutes tick away. The A/C wasn't turned on, it was a chilly day, but the classroom was warm with so many people inside of it, yet Vince was easily freezing.

He rubbed his hands together, shoving them in his armpits and leaning back in his chair. Vince was nearly drifting off, when suddenly there was a knock in his door, startling most of his students.

He paused the movie, standing up and immediately regretted it. The whole room turned around him and Vince braced against his desk, taking shallow breaths through his mouth. The room was already dark to begin with, but there were bigger black spots in his vision... He squeezed his eyes shut and gulped down when his stomach flipped, vomit rushing up his throat.

He swallowed convulsively, there was no way he was going to puke in front of his students.

Someone was talking with him, a cacophony of noises and Mr. Monacelli spoken over each other...

Vin's knees gave up and he crumbled down.

He was out for just a minute, because when he opened his eyes again, the classroom was lit up, but his students were still there. Looking at him with huge, scared eyes.

Vin was flat on his back on the ground and he didn't dare moving, his head still felt stuffed with cotton and his mouth had that watery consistency of when he was about to throw up.

"Out, c'mon, everyone out. Go to the chem classroom and don't touch anything before I get there, I'm serious," Max's voice and Vince blinked, trying to find the blonde in the middle of the crowd. Freaking midget.

Slowly the room started to empty out as the teacher shepherd the kids away and Vince was left alone, with only Daniels and-

"What's wrong with you?" Sophia's voice had that whiny tone, as if she was about to cry, "Vin?"

"I'm- I'm okay..." Vince lied, but still didn't move. He wasn't feeling well at all and he knew if he tried to sit up, he was going to throw up on her lap, "go- go to class."

"No! I don't wanna-"

"You heard him, Soph," Max's voice was impossibly gentle, a tone Vince wasn't sure he had heard before, "go to class, I'm going to get him to the infirmary."

"He looks so pale..." Sophia whined, reaching without thinking to cup Vince's face.

He sighed, his sister wasn't the touchy type, so this brief touch meant she was worried as hell. Vince gulped down, "I'm okay, bambi. Go to class."

He only used this nickname with Livia nowadays, had stopped using it with Sophia years ago, but she melted immediately as he said it. She nodded, still pouting.

"I'm telling mamma."

"No, don't do-"

"I'm telling mamma!" Sophia hissed, not leaving any room for him to argue, "and you better really go to the infirmary," happy with her veredict, she got up and stomped out of the room.

No sooner she was out, Max let out a small amused huff, "she's worried."

"She's gonna cause our mother to be hysterical," Vince groaned, accepting Max's outstretched had and slowly sitting up against the wall. He didn't dare standing up, taking measured breaths as his head spun.

"What happened?" Max asked, eyeing him weirdly and Vince gulped down.

He couldn't answer, the nausea from before was catching up quickly and he didn't seem able to swallow quick enough.

"Vince," Max's voice gentle, but firm and a little exasperated, "you're a little green around the gills, are you gonna hurl?"

Vince wanted to say no, but he couldn't. He gave the other man a minimal nod and heard as Max cursed, lurching over Vince in order to grab the paper waste basket under his desk and shoving it in front of the man.

Vin grabbed it, white knuckling the edge and holding it up to his chin, but still fighting valiantly. He let out a little gag and leaned forward, grimacing as he felt Max grabbing his shoulder and holding him up.

He spat the thick saliva inside the bin, panting for air and feeling his head spin... Max pushed his curls back, tsking unhappily under his breath as he asked, "you got a hair tie? Your lion mane is in the way-" he clearly didn't expect an answer, removing his own hair tie in order to pull Vince's hair into a flimsy ponytail.

Vince coughed once more, this time managing to bring up a deep belch that felt like he had been pushed in the stomach, but nothing more. He sighed, lowering the bin slightly, "won't come up."

"Do you even have anything to come up?" Max frowned, moving so he was in front of Vince once more, "I didn't see you in the cafeteria today."

"You were-" Vince breathed in, forcing up another tiny burp, "you were looking?"

Max's concerned expression immediately turned into a frown, his whole face turning red, "No, I just paid attenti-"

"Relax," Vin interrupted him, closing his eyes and breathing in and out measuredly, "I'm just messing with you," he opened his eyes once more and forced a small smile, "can you help me to the infirmary?" he didn't like that he needed help, but Vince was being realistic. Even sitting down it still felt like the room was spinning.

"Yeah, of course-" Max wrapped an arm around his waist and Vince threw an arm around his shoulder, but the blonde let out a grunt as he pulled them both up, "fuuck you're heavy-"

"Muscle... Muscle is heavy," Vince stumbled, nearly falling and slumping against the blonde. They both wavered, but Max dug his heels, keeping him upright.

"It's like holding up a fridge," Max scoffed under his breath, causing Vin to smile.

Slowly they made their track down the hallway to the infirmary and the deja vú was not lost on Vince. He would've been more amused by it if the black spots weren't back and he wasn't struggling to put a foot in front of the other.

"Vince," Max patted his cheek lightly, "Monacelli, hey, look at me. Vince!"

Vin frowned, blinking a bunch of times to situate himself. He was now standing right in front of the infirmary's door, still held up by Daniels only.

"Why did we stop?"

"Your knees were buckling, you were going out on me," Daniels was glaring at him and Vince let out a chuckle as the expression reminded him of Jonah. The blonde's chocolate eyes squinted at him, "what's funny?"

"Nothing," Vince rubbed his face, trying to stand up straight, "you remind me of one of my friends, that's all."

"Uhm," Max didn't look convinced, but he shrugged after a minute, "a handsome friend?" he kept a hand on Vince's shoulder, while stretching out to knock on the infirmary door with the other one.

"Oh yeah, total pretty boy," Vince answered, leaning back against the lockers and breathing slowly as his head swam.

The next thing he knew, the school nurse was fussing over him and Max was complaining about his size once more, as they stumbled inside the small room and Vince was forced to crawl on the stretcher that was frankly ridiculously small for him.

"You look like a moose lying in a doll crib," Max voiced exactly what Vince was thinking, since his feet were dangling out of the stretcher and Vince had heard very clearly the thing creak under his weight, "you're sure this thing is not gonna crumble under him, Doyle?"

Mrs. Doyle looked horribly offended at Max's nonchalant address of her. She wrinkled her nose, in distaste and Vince buried his face in the flimsy, barely there, pillow, as he heard the woman say, "it can handle big people, Mr. Daniels. Don't you have anywhere to be? Vincenzo, who should I call?"

No one, Vince thought, letting out a groan. His mother would freak out and he wasn't sure he could deal with her energy at the moment. His dad was probably at work right now.

"I'll drive him, I just need to wrap up my class," Max's tone was gleeful and Vince opened an eye to look at him. The blonde was smiling smugly as he walked to the stretcher, "just how fast the tables turn, uh?" he crouched down to be at Vince's eye level, "I think Doyle just called you fat."

"I'm not fat, I'm big," Vince glared at him, "and fluffy."

Max's nostrils flared as he breathed in, amused, and patted Vin's arm, "yeah yeah, big and fluffy. Don't go anywhere, I'll come collect you in half an hour."

"Okay..." Vince closed his eyes once more and let out a small moan as it felt like the stretcher was going from one side to the other, like a hammock. The movement was starting to make him motion sick, but before the nausea could make itself known, he drifted off once more.

[ineffable-suffering]

Why Aziraphale is an unreliable narrator

Part 1: The Story of Job

I'm absolutely not the first one to talk about this on here and I probably shan't be the last either. Alas, here's my take on why all of the minisodes in Season 2 should be enjoyed with great care – and taken with a grain of angelic salt.

I'm gonna split this into 3 parts, aka the three minisodes we are shown, since I tend to get a bit waffley in my posts and want to still be able to include all the little details. Once I've written them, I'll link Part 2 & Part 3 here as well!

Alright, let's get into it under the cut of doom.

Episode 2 opens with the Story of Job. Right off the bat, I noticed that it sort of looks like an old film playing. At first I didn't read that much into it, but once we see the cut-away to Aziraphale at the bookshop, currently reading that part of the Bible (presumably), I immediately thought: "Oh! It's because it's his memory. He's remembering how it went down and therefore it plays like a figurative film in his head."

This, I then came to realize, is a very crucial difference to all the flashbacks of S1, which were exclusively told and narrated by God. May her intensions be as ineffable as they are: She did tell us all of these stories from an objective outsider's point of view. Now, however, it's Aziraphale who's re-telling those stories to us from memory.

And if there's one thing that's for certain, it's that a memory is something entirely different to an objective narration of a story. Just think about how you yourself remember things. Especially things that happened years, maybe even decades (or, in an angel's case, millenia) ago. What is it, that you really remember? Can you know for sure, that a conversation was held with those exact words? Are you 100% certain that the clothes someone wore weren't different? Had it really been snowing or would that make very little sense given what you're remembering happened in May? And did it even happen in May? Or does that just happen to be your favourite month, the current weather, your preferred style of clothing and what it was that you would imagine someone would have said to you?

What I'm trying to say is: The further away it is that something happened, the more your brain has to fill in the gaps. This is why, for example, your parents will remember the family summer holiday entirely different when you ask them about it 20 years later.

"No, it was Sarah who puked on the car ride home!" "Nonsense, Sarah never puked as a child. Bobby had that gone-off pizza, he's the one that was sick the whole ride long!"

We've all been there. Bobby made it out alive. Don't buy gas station pizza.

Alright, back to the plot: Naturally, Aziraphale is not actually human, so it is a pure assumption on my part that the way his memory works is similar to ours. However, the whole topic of "memory" is actually quite a recurring one on Good Omens.

Crowley seems to have lost his in the Fall, yet somehow managed to get most of it back. Not all of it, though, he clearly has some major gaps ("You used to jump on me back, little monkey in the waistcoat!"). Beelzebub helps Gabriel store all his memories in their little fly container before they get wiped entirely too, by the Metatron and/or Saraqael. Crowley and Aziraphale (and possibly Jimbriel) perform a miracle together that makes everyone in Heaven and Hell forget who Garbiel is or what he looks like. And we know that the Book of Life apparently has the ability to completely erase someone from existence – ergo also erasing them from everyone's memory and making it is as though the person had never been in them at all.

So, clearly, angels and demons being able to remember, forget, reconstruct and, if you're the Metadork, wipe memories, is very much canon. Apart from that very last one, it does make them quite human-like in a way. We too can forget or (wrongfully and incompletely) reconstruct memories, due to things like trauma, illness or simply a lot of time having passed.

So, just like Crowley remembers going into battle but doesn't remember Furfur being there, or just like Jimbriel has entierly forgotten who he is but still remembers the tune and lyrics to Buddy Holly's song Everyday, and just like archangel Michael was miraculously made to forget Gabriel and yet says "Don't I know you?" when seeing him again – just like that, Aziraphale's memories of the story of Job, the story of wee Morag and the story of the magic show in 1941, might not actually be the whole truth.

So, time to look at where the furniture isn't.

Now, it could very well be that the costume designers of S2 thought: "Fuck it, let's go crazy" – but given that this show has a track record of meticulously making sure to stick to accurate and cohesive character design, doesn't it strike you as odd that Crowley would go from this look at the Flood in Mesopotamia, 3004 BC:

... to the (very iconic, don't get me wrong) Bildad the Shuhuite drip in 2500 BC:

... back to this at the crucifixion of Jesus Christ in 33 AD:

I mean ... I mean– come on, that seems like a bit of a far stretch, even for someone as enthusiastically experimental with fashion as Crowley.

And it's not just that: Where did the sunglasses come from, all of a sudden? And why do they look like some sort of obscure, ancient optometrist's device? It's a known historical fact that the Romans were the ones to have invented sunglasses, somewhere around 50-ish AD. Which actually matches perfectly with when Crowley and Aziraphale meet again in Rome 8 years after the crucifixion (51 AD).

So, where do the weird spectacles come from, over 2000 years too early? Maybe from Aziraphale's brain filling in some gaps? Hasn't Crowley always worn those ridiculous sunglasses? Was it Rome? Or Golgotha? Wessex? Oh, blimey, what does it matter!

And it's not just Crowley: Aziraphale's own clothes, as well as the other angels', seem to be very different from the rather plain linen we see him wear before and after the story of Job.

They're laced with golden embroidery along the neckline and sleeves. The remind almost of the clothes angels are depicted wearing in biblical and historical drawings. Ornate and decadent. Not at all like we see Aziraphale in the other flashbacks of S1.

Even Bildad the Shuhite's hair within the minisode keeps changing, going from all pouffy and voluminous to rather deflated and straight-looking:

The costume department either had to fix up two seperate wigs or manually straighten out the volume of the one again to give it a more sleek look. I'm not a professional in this field, but if there's anything I've learned from watching hours of behind-the-scenes material of movies and shows, it's that very little about costume, character, prop and set design is purely coincidental.

You know what it could be, though? An accurate representation of how memories aren't linear, historically correct and objective representations of a certain event, but rather an ever-changing, jumbled mess of impressions, emotions and exaggerations.

More specifically: Aziraphale's impression, emotions and exaggerations.

Like "remembering" Crowley with sunglasses because he's been wearing them for so long.

Like "remembering" himself wearing more luxurious, angelic clothes because that's how he thinks of the difference between Heaven and Hell.

Like "remembering" the permit as a ridiculously long scroll that folded out over an entire valley.

Like "remembering" Job's children to be weirdly sassy in an almost Aziraphale-esque way (Enon: "Don't be silly!") for the fact that Job would have probably taught them to be more humble and obedient in the presence of a literal angel.

Like "remembering" eating an entire fucking Ox after having just one bite of it while Crowley watched him lustfully, sipping on his wine.

Like "remembering" Crowley calling him 'angel', despite them having barely known each other back then.

There's a reason why the flashbacks in S2 seem so much more alive, quirky and, at many points, confusing and all over the place. Because they're not objective stories being told by a third party. They're Aziraphale's. So much of his own thoughts and feelings at the time get projected onto them because that's simply how memory works!

It's subjective. It's unrealiable.

It's not that I'm calling Aziraphale a liar. He's no more a liar than your parents are, mixing up Sarah and Bobby. Or you, remembering snow instead of sunshine. Memories aren't lies. They can simply be faulty, focus on things that you thought were more important and leaving out or changing things that weren't, to you.

The real challenge in all of this, is trying to filter through Aziraphale's stories to see what it actually is they're telling us. Where it is that the furniture isn't. And I think in this case, that's 6 main things (eff you, God, I know you like sevens, but I don't care):

God and Satan (still) talk to each other We see that Aziraphale is quite surprised when Muriel mentions that the whole Job thing is God's bet with Satan. But clearly, despite having made him and the rest fall, God still converses with Her number one traitor about whether or not the humans simply love Her because she gives them nice things or because they truly believe in Her.

God and Satan (and Heaven and Hell) can and do collaborate with each other when they feel like it So much for choosing sides, huh? Truthfully, this is not the first time this is shown to us, but still. It's another piece of evidence on the growing pile.

Aziraphale understands the World and humans way better than any of the other angels "Well, you see ... Citis is 58 ..."

Aziraphale, despite having troubles voicing it, absolutely disagrees and even condemns God's plan of destroying Job's children (and goats and camels and––)

Aziraphale is willing to lie and thwart the will of God Also not the first time we're being shown this but again, piiiile of evidence.

Angels don't automatically Fall simply by doing the above To me, this is one of the most important take aways. It's already hinted in S1 as well that 'Falling' seems to have been a one time even back when the first war broke out in Heaven. And I actually believe that ever since then, no other angels have Fallen again. Aziraphale is the best example for this. He has gone against God's plan numerous times and even lied to her very face (voice?) about it. And yet, nothing ever happened to him. Why exactly that is the case remains a topic for another meta (that I might or might not be working on already, teehee).

Alright, that concludes this first look at the Job minisode! If there's anything I missed, feel free to share it with me. I'll try and add Part 2 (the story of wee Morag) and Part 3 (the magic show of 1941) soon.

Update: Part 2 and Part 3 have officially been written, you can find it them right here:

Part 2: The Story of wee Morag

Part 3: The Story of the Magic Show in 1941

Hugs and kisses, (God)!

[sosappyjoos]

Ooooh, well since you love Yunho.

I'll guess I'll request a yunho smut please?

Yunho+praise+possessiveness

Thank you 🙏

Good Kisser-Jeong Yunho

↳Pairing : Jeong Yunho x f!reader

↳Warnings: MDNI! Seriously, dont! Smut, making out, brief mention of vomit (reader pukes on Yunho, but it's not mentioned too much), fingering (f. receiving), dick bulge, dom!Yunho, public sex, f!orgasm boss yunho, office romance, jealous and possessive Yunho, pet names (Sweatheart and baby), praise kink, Wooyoung and Yeosang are in the story but Y/N's friends and co-workers, mention of San. (pls let me know if there's anything else I should add)

Word count: 5,519

Summary: Reader gets drunk one night and talks bad about her boss Jeong Yunho, who ends up taking care of your drunk mistakes that night, including making out with him. But instead of being fired, you find that he's become rather possessive and a bit jealous about your interactions with some of your male co-workers.

Genre: enemies to lovers(?), office romance.

A/N: Aghhh this is my first ever fanfiction and actually my first time ever writing smut. This is unedited, so I'm sorry if there's any mistakes. But this was so much fun to write, and thank you @whatudowhennooneseesyou for the request. I hope you enjoy it. And maybe part 2?👀 Let me know if you want it. Also if people could please reblog this, that would be so helpful to help it get more attention and help me to continue writing amazing requests like this for everyone to enjoy. Anyways, enjoy!!

__________________________________________

“Fuck you, Wooyoung,” you cried out drunkenly. “Why did you introduce me to this damn job?”

“uh-huh I got it, I’m sorry,” Wooyoung tried calming you, looking around the busy restaurant apologetically.

“I work… I work over time every night, and I don’t even get to have a lunch break,” you raised your arms clumsily in exasperation, standing up from the frustration building in you. “And everyone,” you started waving your arms, at the indication, slightly stumbling. “Piles their work on me since I’m the "newbie." Their work isn’t even my job, I’m a secretary. What am I? Some kind of intern? I'm not even that new! I've been working here for 8 months!" You pointed too yourself, eyes wide. "But you know what?!”

Wooyoung cringed, looking behind you, quickly tugging on your arms trying to get you to sit down. “I get it, I know. Now sit down before you fall.”

You thankfully cooperated. “The worst of them all is Jeong Yunho,” You attempted to say in a hushed tone, but it was still loud. “That bastard really gets on my nerves." You sighed, your bottom lip sticking out in a pathetic pout. "Yea, he’s my boss. But does he have to give me so much work to do?! I can’t even go on any dates because I don’t have time! It's his fault that I'm still single!” You cried. Wooyoung tried covering your mouth, but you quickly shoved his hand away, glaring at him. “He’s always so abrupt, and strict.”

“I understand. Just quiet down, huh?” Wooyoung continued trying to calm you, looking anxiously from you, to something over your shoulder. But you were so wasted you hardly even noticed how nervous he seemed.

“He hardly even talks to me, too! He just tells me what he needs with a few short words and then ignores my existence!" "Does he not realize I'm human? I'm a human being! It's so lonely sitting at my desk where no one but him is around," you whined. "He’s just a mindless working jerk!”

“Y/N, be quiet, huh?” Wooyoung now hissed through clenched teeth. 

“Ugh,” You quickly stood up again. “And stop looking behind me, it’s so annoying!” Standing up that quickly wasn't the wisest move you made that evening, as you quickly lost your balance and began to stumble backwards. Wooyoung’s face distorted to a face of shock as he stood up reaching for you. Your eyes widened and you let out a small yelp before feeling an arm wrap around your waist, stopping your descent to the ground. The realization was a bit slow for your drunken state, but you finally looked up at who had miraculously caught you. Your eyes narrowed and you quickly stood up as straight as you could, your feet still fumbling a bit, your heels clacking loudly against the floor. 

“Jeong Yunho!” You yelled at the man himself as he continued holding onto your arm, stabilizing you. He watched you carefully as you pointed your finger to his face. “You’re a fuckhead!” you giggled at the made up insult. Yunho’s eyes widened with shock at the nickname before chuckling to himself with a smirk on his lips. You slumped a little bit against him, suddenly tired. Yunho looked at Wooyoung, who was watching the scenario you had gotten yourself into with a cringe on his face.

“How much did she drink?” Yunho asked him.

“More than usual,” Wooyoung told him shrugging. “I guess the stress really got to her. What brings you here, Yunho?” Wooyoung asked, a slight smirk on his face. “Did you come because of my text?”

Yunho was silent for a moment. “Why did you both decide to drink on a week-day?”

“We weren’t here originally to drink. We were just eating,” Wooyoung sighed, leaning back in his seat. “But Y/N just kept drinking more and more. I’m sure you can guess why from overhearing her earlier?” He raised any eyebrow at Yunho, scanning his expression. Yunho pressed his lips together, swallowing. He avoided Wooyoung's eyes for a moment. Wooyoung stood up with a grunt before clapping his hand on Yunho's shoulder. “I have to get going now. The guys are wanting to go clubbing.”

“On a week-day?" Yunho asked. Wooyoung simply shrugged, giving a lazy salute with his two fingers. "Aren’t you going to take her home?" Yunho called after.

“That’s your problem now! See you later lover boy,” Wooyoung waved at Yunho and walked out of the restaurant. 

Yunho sighed, annoyed. He held you close to him, as he bent down grabbing your bag and jacket from your chair. He started to make his way to the exit when he was stopped by one of the staff. “Excuse me sir, but the meal over there still hasn’t been paid for.”

Yunho scoffed, and shook his head, knowing Wooyoung left the bill to him. “That little shit.” He mumbled, before quickly paying and walking out of the restaurant. The cold air bit at your exposed face and arms, making you whine. The sound was oddly rather sexual, making Yunho's cheeks warm in the cold weather. He cursed his mind for thinking such thoughts, looking up at the sky, trying his best to ignore any such thoughts. He pressed his lips together, before wrapping your jacket over your shoulders. You suddenly stood up straight, stumbling like an uneven bowling ball, singing a tune that Yunho didn't have a chance at recognizing with your offkey singing. He huffed a small laugh, holding your wrist to keep you out of the way of others and the street.

With some difficulty he guided you to his car, and you didn't make it any easier for him to help you inside. And once you were inside, of course that was when you fell asleep. Yunho let out an exhasperated sigh sitting in the drivers seat. He rested his hands on the steering wheel, looking over at you peacefully sleeping next to him. You had a small pout when you slept, and Yunho found himself smiling at how adorable he found it. He straightened up and stopped smiling as soon as he noticed though. He now debated on where to drive. He'd tried to get your address from you earlier, however that conversation wasn't exactly productive. He'd tried calling Wooyoung, but was sent straight to voicemail. He debated his options, before shifting the gear in his car. “My house it is, I guess,” Yunho mumbled. The drive was quiet, and thankfully, getting you out of his car was not nearly as difficult as getting you in. You had simply flopped over his back, making it easy for him to carry you into his apartment.

But when he was almost to his bedroom door, he horrifyingly heard a gag from you! He hurriedly opened his door, but before he could reach the bathroom, he felt an uncomfortable warm wetness over his shoulder, and a very unsatisfying "Bleugh" from you. You had vomited over his white button up, and he felt unbelievably uncomfortable, his shoulders slumping in defeat with a heavy sigh. This wasn't the kind of thing he'd been expecting on a Wednesday night.

He carried you into his bathroom, leaving you seated on his sink counter. You kicked your feet playfully as he got out a spare toothbrush he'd gotten from a dentist visit. He put some toothpaste on it, and coaxed you into opening your mouth. You cooperated giggling drunkenly. As he began to brush your teeth, you looked up at him with doe eyes. He was once again cursing his dirty mind, and tried his best to not imagine something very different from a toothbrush in your mouth. He closed his eyes a moment trying to reset his mind before he resumed helping you brush your teeth, quite thoroughly.

"This is ridiculous," he mumbled to himself. And he really felt that way, it was a simple task that you could probably do yourself, but here he was helping you brush your teeth, while you smiled obliviously. After your teeth were sufficiently cleaned, Yunho helped you down from the counter top, and guided you to his bed. You sat down, passively looking around at his room.

Yunho took the opportunity to gingerly take off his shirt, grabbing an oversized gray t-shirt. But before he could put it on, a pair of arms swiftly wrapped around his waist, pulling him back harshly. He fell back on his bed, a startled yelp managing to escape him. And there you were, hovering over him, your eyes seductive. You ran a hand through your hair, out of your face, letting it fall gently to the side of you.

“Y/N?”

You smiled, leaning down close to his face, your lips a breath away. His eyes widened, and he swiftly grabbed your arms sitting up, avoiding the impending kiss. You groaned at the sudden separation.

“Y/N calm down."

“I'm calm,” You smiled, your hands cupping his face. You leaned in to kiss him, this time too swift for him to stop you. His eyes remained wide for a moment, before easing into the kiss. The kiss was slow at first, your heart was beating quickly, and your cheeks felt even more flushed than usual because of the alcohol. Yunho gently held the back of your head as you wrapped your arms around his neck. His other hand held your waist and began to slowly trail up through your shirt, both of you pulling to deepen the kiss. You began to descend your hand down his chest, before reaching the bulge in his pants. You firmly palmed it, making him moan. However, the action brought Yunho back to reality as he realized the situation. 

Yunho pulled away from the kiss abruptly, shocked. You were also shocked but from the abrupt pause. He held your shoulders back as both of you breathed heavily from the make out session. His eyes sparkled as you looked at them, and seemed to hesitate before he avoided yours, distancing himself with you. You reached out for him again, but he caught your arms holding them away from him. “Y/N, you’re drunk.” He shut you down. Your eyebrows furrowed, a protest on the tip of your lips. But he stood up with a deep breath, still avoiding eye contact with you. “You can sleep here on my bed tonight. You have work tomorrow, so rest well.”

He swiftly left the room, and you simply stared at the door. Your head was fuzzy, and your eyelids felt heavy. After waiting a moment in case he returned, you finally laid back on the bed, hardly anything running through your drunk mind as you drifted off to sleep.

___________________________________________________________

You woke up the next morning to your alarm ringing which also triggered an excruciating headache. You groaned, reaching for your phone on your dresser, only there was no dresser as you reached. Your head popped up from your pillow, confused. You squinted around the room you were in, only to see it was not your room at all. You quickly sat up a gasp escaping you, your phone still ringing as flashbacks from the night before came into your mind full swing. Not only had you totally bad-mouthed your boss and he potentially heard it, but you also called him a childish insult right to his face. And to top it all off, you had made out with your “Fuckface” boss after puking on his shirt. You groaned mortified at yourself as you quickly stood to look for your phone, seeing it surprisingly neatly charging on the dresser, with a green sticky note on it. You shut off the blaring alarm, slightly relieving the mind splitting headache you were suffering from. Then you looked at the sticky note. 

“I set an alarm for you on your phone so you'd wake up in time. There’s some new clothes for you in the bag on the dining table along with some food to help with your hangover. You can take a shower if needed. and the toothbrush you used last night is still there, it's the purple one. I sent you where the closest subway station is too. Don’t be late -Fuckface”

You once again groaned seeing the horrid nickname you’d given him written at the bottom of the sticky note, crouching down. “I’m done for,” you chuckled in disbelief, letting yourself simply fall to the floor. “My career is over, my life is over-” you let yourself just whine, absolutely mortified. But remembering the warning against being late to work, you checked your phone, relieved to see that you had time to get in the shower as Yunho had said. You tried pushing your embarrassing night out of your head, so all that remained was your terrible hangover. You got up and walked into the kitchen to see some porridge and a glass of water on the table, along with the bag of clothes Yunho had left. You stared at the bowl of porridge for a moment before slumping down in the seat, eating it quickly. It was tasty, and you couldn't help but think about how thorough Yunho was even outside of work. After showering and getting dressed, and applying what little make-up you had in your purse, you hurriedly left the house. 

The subway station was really close which made things even less stressful for this morning. And even though you still had a bone to pick with Yunho, you were thankful for how easy he had made it for you this morning. It wasn’t like he was the worst boss out there of course. He was just… very very particular about his work, so much so that it didn’t seem like you could hardly do anything “right” according to him the first 3 months of working for him. You were shocked you hadn’t been fired before during that time as it truly seemed nothing was up to his standard. But finally you had gotten the hang of things a bit, and were able to do some things right. It was even more difficult when your co-workers kept giving you tasks that weren’t even for secretaries, let alone a personal one. They all treated you like an intern, and it felt insulting. But you clenched your teeth and did the work anyway, overworking yourself to the bone. 

You took a deep breath in front of your work building, mentally preparing yourself to go inside and face your boss. The same boss you'd most definitely offended, and most definitely kissed last night.

“Good morning,” a bright voice said behind you, and a skipping wooyoung stopped at your side, a giant grin on his face. 

“Good morning, my ass!” You scowled, glaring at Wooyoung. He inched away from you, a . “Why the hell did you leave me to Mr. Jeong, you asshole!”

“I had to leave!”

“But that’s my boss you left me with, drunk! Who I bad mouthed too!”

“Well someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed,” he pouted. 

You pressed your lips into a thin line, nodding a bit. “Well, I guess you could say something like that,” you mumbled. 

“Ladies first,” Wooyoung indicated for you to enter the building first. 

"Then I insist you be the one to go first,” you smiled sarcastically.

Wooyoung squinted at you, before walking inside, you following close behind, your shoulders sagging in reluctance.

“So, what ended up happening last night?” You both stepped into the elevator

“I’d really rather not talk about it.”

“That bad huh?”

“No, it was worse than bad Wooyoung. All I’m going to say is don’t be surprised if I never come to work again after today,” you sighed, walking out of the elevator together. 

“You’re exaggerating,” Wooyoung squinted at you. 

“I wish I was! I really fucking wish I was.”

You approached your desk which was just outside of Yunho’s office. The lights seemed to still be off inside his office, meaning he still wasn’t there. You let out the hundredth sigh already today as you slumped down in your chair.

“It’s over,” you once again mumbled to yourself, remembering last night's events. The way Yunho's lips were so soft but strong against yours, and the way he held you so close to him. The way his fingers brushed against your skin.

You sat up abruptly though, shutting down those thoughts before your face turned bright red. "All I can do now is try to convince him to let me stay," you mumbled, straightening some papers you had on your desk.

And there he was right down the hall, Yunho's steady foot prints approaching your desk. You quickly stood up, ready to greet him. You bowed to him with a polite “Good morning Mr. Jeong,” as he passed by, opening the door to his office. You let out a breath you didn't know you were holding, thankful he passed by so quickly.

“Ms. Y/N,” Yunho called, and your head snapped up to him. He was holding his door open. 

“Yes?”

“Come inside,” he simply said, walking into his office. 

“Yes…” you groaned, your shoulders slumped as you walked through his office door.

“Mr. Park wants to reschedule our upcoming meeting to the 27th, adjust my schedule to fit him in,” Yunho said nonchalantly, taking off his suit coat and resting it on his chair. 

“Ah, yes. I’ll quickly do that for you…” You said slowly. You furrowed your brows. 

“Oh, and be sure to remind team 1 we have a meeting today to talk about the upcoming project.”

“Of course,” you affirmed. You couldn’t help but feel a little bit confused. He’s acting the same as always. You stared in a bit of disbelief at him. He settled into his seat, opening a manila folder. He looked up at you, puzzled.

“You can leave now.”

“Ah, right.”

You quickly rushed out of his office and into your own space, looking at his calendar for the 27th. You shifted a few things around, but thankfully there wasn’t much scheduled that day yet. You also sent out a reminder to Team 1 about the meeting that would be held in an hour. After that you scanned your emails, thankful for the distraction. 45 minutes passed of productive work before you stood up, and began getting the meeting room ready, setting out water bottles, folders and snacks on the table for everyone.

“Y/N,” you heard Wooyoung call. You turned around to see him at the door, smiling as always. 

“What do you need this time?”

“I’m just setting up the presentation,” he shrugged, bringing his laptop in, and setting it up to the big screen at the front of the room. Wooyoung was the team leader of Team 1. You already knew by now that Yunho and Wooyoung were actually pretty close, but you didn’t mind. You’d known Wooyoung since high school, and you’d gone your separate ways after during college, and a few years after that you'd gotten back in contact. You were thankful he’d introduced you to such a big job, but Yunho’s constant corrections of every little thing, and abrupt demands and assumption that you knew what he was thinking 24/7 was still exhausting. The powerpoint was open at the ready. Wooyoung walked over to you, as you were restocking one of the snack baskets. He reached over to pick up one of the mini packages of almonds. “Can’t you bring better snacks than these?” You rolled your eyes, attempting to snatch it out of his hands, but he quickly lifted his arm so the snack was out of reach.

“These are fine. Besides, Mr. Jeong likes them right now,” you sighed, once again trying to reach for them. 

“Ah, your prince charming last night?”

You grunted, huffing the hair out of your face as you continued to reach for the snack. Wooyoung let out an annoying giggle which was only getting more and more on your nerves. 

“Ahem,” someone behind you interrupted. You stopped, spinning around to see Yunho, leaning against the glass door frame. He had an eyebrow lifted, and his jaw was slacked. He stared at us, unamused. 

“Oh Yunho!” Wooyoung greeted finally lowering his arm. You quickly snatched the snack out of his hands and bowed to Yunho. You then started filling the snack basket again, but you could feel Yunho’s eyes still on you.

“Is everything set up?” Yunho finally asked Wooyoung. 

“Yes, everyone should be here in just a minute.”

________________________________________________________

The meeting had started out fine, but Yunho quickly began analyzing the imperfections and holes in Team 1's product plan, seemingly extra irritable. Poor Wooyoung was a mess trying to reason with Yunho and keep up with his frequent “attacks.”

“Apparently he also woke up on the wrong side of the bed,” Wooyoung mumbled to you, packing up his laptop. 

Well, once again, it was something like that. You patted Wooyoung's shoulder encouragingly. “Come on, it wasn’t that bad,” you tried. “And it’s good he’s bringing attention to these things early on so it runs more smoothly when we finally start on the project,” you reasoned. 

“Y/N,” Yunho said sternly. He walked up to you and Wooyoung. “I need you to copy 70 of these and distribute them to all team members personally. After that I need you to plan and schedule the Breakfast Banquet in June. I expect it to be half-way finished by today. Oh, and I also need you to contact Mrs. Lim about the advertisement set-up, and have her change the place to somewhere more… exotic.” Yunho piled. You had gotten out your tablet halfway, frantically typing down everything he had told you, precisely. “Oh, and bring me some coffee and some lunch. Make sure it’s something refreshing.”

“Yes, I’ll start on everything right away,” you said, as he began walking away. 

“Ah, and if this is too abrupt and strict for you, then… so very sorry,” he gave you a sarcastic smile, before walking away

Your jaw dropped as you watched him leave. So this is about last night. You closed your mouth, letting out a scoff.

“You regretting what you said last night yet?” Wooyoung teased. You slammed the papers Yunho had handed you onto the table, and gave Wooyoung a scathing glare. Wooyoung took the hint and quickly left you seething.

______________________________________________________

The next day you came to work with very prominent dark circles under your eyes. The additional work Yunho had piled on you had proven to be very difficult and you left work way later than usual, absolutely drained. You were thankful it was now Friday, impatient for the weekend. 

“Woah! What happened to you?” Were Wooyoung's first words seeing your face at your desk. You glared at him. "You look like shit."

"Thanks for boasting my confidence there," you said in a monotone voice. “I worked overtime last night.”

Wooyoung pursed his lips. “Couldn’t be me. I went clubbing with some girls. Yeosang and San came with me,” he bragged. This only made you more annoyed. 

“Clubbing. On a weekday?” you let out an annoyed chuckle. “Wooyoung, you better get out of here in 3 seconds or I strangle you.”

Wooyoung gave another smile and quickly walked away from your desk. You sighed holding your temples. You heard Yunho step out of his office, and you quickly stood, bowing to him. He pursed his lips gradually approaching your desk. 

“The Breakfast Banquet planning looks good so far. You can slow down on the project now over the next few months. And Mrs. Lim called with the new location for the ad. It fits well,” Yunho told you awkwardly.

You gave your best smile. “Glad to hear it.”

He nodded, walking away slowly. 

“Glad to hear it,” You mocked yourself. “More like that’s what I better hear, you-!” Your phone pinged and you glanced down at the message. It was an announcement of a team dinner with team 1 that you were invited to. You smiled, excited for ending the evening the right way.

“Y/N!” You looked up and spotted one of the members of Team 2, Han Yoonjung approaching your desk, with a big smile. Your own smile faltered. Yoonjung was one of the main perpetrators of passing off her work to you. And she always made it practically impossible to say no to.

“Hi, Ms. Han,” you greeted politely. 

“Oh come on. Call me Yoonjung, I don’t mind,” she smiled. “Hey, so tonight my boyfriend made some plans to go out to dinner that I totally forgot about. Problem is I have a bit of a project that I need to finish before tomorrow. Would you be able to finish it for me?” she asked. 

You paused for a moment, already annoyed. “But I actually have a bit of plans tonight. There’s a team dinner.”

“Oh those are lame anyways. Always so stuffy and boring. I'd actually be doing you a favor helping you get out of it,” she dismissed. “Please?”

You hesitated on what to say, wanting to refuse more firmly while still being polite. You opened your mouth to speak, but someone spoke before you could. “She said she had plans tonight.” You looked at Yunho as he approached the both of you. 

“Oh, well I was just asking for a bit of a hand to help,” Yoonjung tried to excuse herself. 

“Doing a full project for another worker is hardly a bit of a helping hand. That's quite literally doing their job for them," Yunho explained. Yoonjung was about to speak again, but Yunho beat her to it. "I can’t say I’m impressed that you keep handing off your work to my personal secretary,” Yunho raised an eyebrow. Your stomach jumped. Yes! Help me out of this for once, please! I stayed here way too late last night for you not to stand up for me!

Yoonjung shrank down. “I was just asking since I wanted to go to dinner with my boyfriend and-”

“And I don’t see why Y/N would need to take responsibility for that,” Yunho interrupted, sternly. Yoonjung swallowed, her cheeks red. “I also know this isn’t the first time you or others have asked. Y/N is a personal assistant, not a crew member on one of your teams. Her job is very different, and important for me." Yunho said. His defense was giving you butterflies, which in a way felt pathetic, but you couldn't help but feel a little giddy. "Y/N doesn’t accept work from anyone else, unless it’s been pre-approved by me. I hope you spread this to your co-workers as well,” he told her in a firm yet gentle manner, making sure to stay professional. You looked down at the ground, swallowing a victorious smile. 

“Yes sir,” Yoonjung affirmed. Yunho gave her a short polite smile before she walked away. 

“Thank you, Mr. Jeong.”

“Of course. And it's true, you shouldn't be accepting work from others unless I approve, so don’t hesitate to call for me,” Yunho smiled. He then lifted his hand which held a coffee. “You seemed tired so I got you some coffee.”

You blinked in shock, and then finally grabbed the coffee. “Oh. Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it,” he dismissed, walking away into his office. You held the back of your hand to your cheek, trying to cool it. You couldn’t help but smile as you sipped on the beverage, and sat back down at your desk.

_______________________________________________________

The restaurant was loud with all your co-workers from Team 1 talking and laughing. You were also thankful to be participating in the fun.

“You seem more energetic since Yunho’s additional tasks yesterday,” Yeosang said. He was sitting across from you taking a sip of the water in front of him.

“Oh. It wasn’t so bad,” you dismissed, taking a bite of food. 

“Yea right,” Wooyoung chuckled. “Your dark circles were practically sagging to our feet this morning.”

“Stop exaggerating,” You shoved him. It was true that it was a lot of work, however your mood about it had significantly improved after talking with Yunho. You felt a bit pathetic for feeling so happy over such simple things like him praising you, or defending you against co-workers shrugging their responsibilities on you. But it did make you happy, and you took the optimism gladly. Suddenly there was a rush of shocked conversation around you. You looked up and saw Yunho’s tall and lithe figure walking into the restaurant. Wooyoung and Yeosang waved him over and he approached the three of you. He sat down next to you smiling. He looks so cute. You thought. You may have not always been a fan of Yunho, but you weren’t a liar. He was obviously a very attractive man. So attractive it was sometimes hard to be mad at him. You made eye contact with him and your stares lingered for a moment, before you both looked away. You chewed the inside of your cheek, unsure what to do with yourself now. 

“You made time to come. We’re glad to see you,” Yeosang clapped Yunho’s shoulder.

“I thought it wouldn’t hurt if I came,” Yunho shrugged, taking a drink.

Everyone was enjoying their time eating, drinking and talking. As Yunho, Wooyoung and Yeosang talked and goofed off, you couldn't help but smile along. You were getting a bit tipsy, and decided to dismiss yourself to the bathroom real quickly. You stared at yourself in the mirror, pinching your cheeks a bit trying to remain as sober as you possibly could. Your cheeks were already a bit flushed, and the pinching didn’t help at all, but you couldn't get drunk tonight. Not after that fiasco a few days ago.

You walked out of the bathroom, and there Yunho was leaning against the opposite wall. He walked up to you, a shy look on his face.

  “Listen,” he starts, chewing the inside of his cheek. “I’m sorry for piling all that work on you. I understand it was a lot, and it was petty of me to get back at you.”

You sucked at your teeth taking in his apology. “Don’t worry about it. I’d have to work on all of it eventually, so it was a good head start. Besides, I said some pretty terrible things about you.”

“Guess we’re even now,” Yunho said. 

“Well actually, about that other night-” You started, but Yunho shifted uncomfortably and interrupted you.

“I think we should get back to everyone, don’t you think? Wooyoung and Yeosang will definitely eat all of the meat if we're not there.”

“Oh. I guess so.”

You both started walking back to the group, but before you could be in view of the others Yunho leaned down trapping your head behind a busy booth, whispering in your ear. “You’re a good kisser though.”

Your cheeks flushed and your heart was throbbing as you both sat down. Yunho hid a smile as he sipped on his drink.

“Y/N, were you able to get that guy's number last weekend? I left before seeing you actually do it,” Yeosang asked. You sank down in your seat, embarrassed for some reason.

“No… He left before I could ask,” I said shyly. 

“Come on, you hardly go clubbing with us and you missed this one opportunity to get a guy's number,” Wooyoung whined. “Why don’t you come clubbing with us again this weekend?”

You glanced over at Yunho, his tongue was in his cheek, and nose slightly flared. “I think I’ll actually pass,” you said.

“Then should I be the one to get your number and show you a fun time?” Wooyoung teased.

You fake gagged. “Wooyoung that’s just not right,” you said. 

“You’re right,” he shivered at the idea. 

Yunho quickly stood up now, swinging his suit jacket over his shoulder. “I have to get going now. Wooyoung, make sure to use the business card.” He quickly walked out of the restaurant. You frowned at his abrupt departure, you'd slightly been hoping to talk more.

“What was that about?m He looked pissed.” Yeosang mumbled. Wooyoung and Yeosang dove back into conversation, while you were lost in thought. What did Yunho mean exactly, by being a good kisser? Why would he say that to you? Was he wanting to forget that night, or remember? You couldn't tell what he was hoping to achieve by complimenting your kissing skills, and it was killing you.

Your phone pinged, dragging you out of your thoughts. The message was from Yunho.

I’m down the street by the bus station. Meet me there in 5 minutes. 

Your heart leaped and you quickly exited the message so Wooyoung’s nosy ass wouldn’t see. You waited for a moment, before standing up with your bag and pulling your long coat on. “Hey I have to get going now. I’ll talk to you guys laterm though.”

Both Wooyoung and Yeosang protested as you left, but you simply waved and walked out the door. You pulled your jacket closer around you, your hairs rising from the bitter cold. You walked at a quick pace to the bus station Yunho had mentioned. You didn’t understand exactly why you felt so giddy. He probably forgot to give you some business file, but for some reason the thought of seeing him in private made your stomach feel jumbled, especially after he had suddenly complimented your kissing skills earlier.

 You arrived at the bus station and looked around. There was an older man, drunkenly sleeping on the bench, but Yunho was nowhere in sight. You felt the giddiness start to dissipate and your shoulders started to slump when you suddenly felt a hand grab your wrist. You turned and saw Yunho quickly pulling you to a dark small alleyway making the giddy feeling come back full swing.

He pushed you against the brick wall, arms holding the wall on both sides of your head. He stared at you for a moment. His eyes sparkling from what little light there was around, but his eyebrows were still raised with an air of sternness. You were breathing heavily, your heart beating quickly from the unexpected turn of events. Finally he leaned down to you, kissing your lips with vigor. You kissed him back matching his intensity. He held your head, and tilted into the kiss, deepening it, now holding your waist with his other hand, pulling you closer to him. The wetness in your panties was inevitable at this point, especially as he placed his leg between yours. He broke away from the kiss, and you briefly worried he would stop like he had last time you’d made out. Instead he spoke in a hushed tone.

“I thought I gave you so much work you didn’t have time to date? You were going to give your number to some guy at the club?” He then started to kiss down your neck, the hand at your head now traveling down your leg. 

“I thought of it, but decided not to after remembering how much I wouldn’t have time for him,” you breathed out.

“Ah, is that why you decided to flirt with Wooyoung instead?” Yunho nibbled at your collar bone.

“Wooyoung and I don’t flirt. He’s basically a brother to me,” You sighed, biting your lip. Yunho moved his hand to the inside of your thigh, traveling up your skirt. You got a run of shivers from his touch along with the cold. 

“And?” Yunho asked, his lips once again at your neck. His long fingers were now brushing the hem of your panties. 

“And I’d never date him,” you told him.

“Good girl,” Yunho said, finally placing his hand over your clothed pussy. He could feel how wet you were, soaking through your panties. He stopped kissing your neck and looked at you now, smirking. “You’re so wet for me, sweetheart,” he hummed. You let out a shaky breath, trying your best not to moan. You gripped onto his arm as his two fingers pushed aside your panties, smoothing over your slickness. “Were you wet like this the last time we made out?” he asked.

You couldn’t even respond, just desperate for his deeper touch. Your eyebrows were furrowed and you closed your eyes, trying to enhance what you were feeling from his fingers. “Your little pout is so pretty, baby. Do you want more?” he asked. You only nodded. You could hear him breathe out a chuckle as he slipped his two fingers inside you. He let them slowly reach up, and slowly pulled them out once more, making you almost moan, but you quickly covered your mouth, choking back the demonstration of pleasure. 

Finally he began to slowly pump his fingers inside you, trying to subtly find your g-spot. Finally, his fingers reached it, and you trembled a little bit, letting out a small whimper. Yunho gave a sly smile. “Found it.” Now that he found it, he was intent on using it as much as he could. As he massaged your g-spot he used his thumb to rub your clit. You were trying so hard not to moan with every pump now, and could only let out small quiet whimpers now. “You’re staying so quiet for me baby, you’re doing so well,” Yunho now whispered in your ear.

“It feels so good,” you whispered back. 

“Better than wooyoung, or that guy could ever make you feel, right?” He asked. You only nodded now, unable to speak. There was tension building up in your stomach, and you held tight onto Yunho’s wrist, feeling your orgasm on its way. “You got it sweetheart. Cum nice and sweet for me.” he encouraged, feeling you start to clench around his fingers. Your relief was hanging on by a string as he fingered you even more rigorously, and he rubbed your clit even harder and faster. Finally your breath hitched as that string finally snapped, and your body shook a moment from the intense orgasm. You barely stifled your moan, but your legs started to lose strength. Thankfully Yunho held you up with strong arms. “You did so well,” he whispered, kissing your forehead. 

“Hey, we should all go for a second round!” You heard Wooyoung's voice approaching from down the street. You quickly looked at Yunho, frightened to be seen in this state. Thankfully he understood your look. The sad part was his fingers leaving your insides, as he used his other hand to spin you away from the outside view of the alleyway. His tall figure blocked you completely from outside view. 

“Haven’t you had enough to drink?” You heard Yeosang reason, very nearby now. Yunho’s head tilted, listening intently. You could see the group's shadow begin passing by in random conversation. 

Yunho gave you a seductive glance, sticking his two fingers which were inside you inside his mouth, sucking. You stared at him, turned on once again. He took the fingers out of his mouth leaning down to you. “You really did cum nice and sweet for me,” he whispered after the group had passed. 

You rolled your eyes, an inevitable smile on your lips. You stood on your tippy toes, giving him a kiss, which he gladly accepted. You broke the kiss, and he looked at you curious. “Am I really that good of a kisser though?”

[rand0mfangurlstuff]

I'll Look After You - Part 3 Bucky x Y/N

I feel like I'm slowly getting the hang of actually making posts on tumblr. I'm still not great but bare with me. I'm still utterly obsessed with John 'Bucky' Egan and since I'm running out of fics to read I feel I need to make my own. Part 2 kinda got away from me but I think I have a bit more of a clear direction for this now. This includes jealous! Bucky. Enjoy:

When Bucky awoke the next morning, he was dissapointed Y/N was not by his side. He had hoped he would get to see her beautiful face again when he woke up. But the chair was empty and the book left on the bedside table. She must have left once I fell asleep he tought to himself. And who could blame her? That chair hardly looked comfortable. I wonder is she working again today? Maybe she will come by again soon. He looked to the book on the table. The hairpin stuck between the pages told him there was still a few more chapters left to read. His chest swelled with hope. She might come back again tonight. Bucky thought about relaxing into the small hospital bed and being comforted by her beautiful voice once more. As he imagined that gorgeous voice, he heard it from a short distance away. Almost as if he had magically made her appear. He couldnt see her, thanks to that godforsaken curtain; but it was her. He heard her melodic laugh. Who is she talking to? Whats so funny? Bucky couldn't help it. Suddenly he felt.. jealous. Why on earth would he feel jealous? Because he wanted to be the once to make her laugh. Thats why. But Bucky did his best to quell those jealous thoughts. She was probably just talking to one of the other nurses.

'I couldnt help it, I just started spewing everywhere!' It was awful.' Bucky knew that voice. That was not a nurses voice. 'Oh Major Crosby, why on earth did you become a flight navigator if you suffered from air sickness!' She said in between giggles. Crosby. Crosby was making her laugh. Well at least she was laughing at him. 'I didnt know I suffered from it till I was already in the air! You gotta help me Y/N, I need more of the stuff the doc gave me but he's not back till Monday!' 'Okay, okay, here you go.' 'Thanks Y/N I really appreciate it.' 'No problem Major.' Bucky heard footsteps, then Croz's voice again. 'Y/N?' 'Yes Major?' 'Please, call me Harry. I was just wondering if I could pay you back, for the pills?' 'Oh theres no need Harry.' 'I know, but I want to thank you properly. Are you working tonight?' 'No, thankfully for the first night in what feels like weeks I'm off for the night.' Bucky's heart sank at this news. There goes his plans of a lovely nights sleep. 'Oh great! Theres a dance on tonight in the main hall, are you going?' 'I hadn't thought about it, but I guess it would be fun!' 'Oh great, well I'll buy you a drink there, to thank you.' 'That's very kind Maj- Harry. I'll see you there.' 'Great! I'll see you there Y/N!'

Bucky's blood boiled. Croz was going to be at the dance with Y/N. Croz couldnt even dance! She would have a terrible time with him. It should be Bucky buying her drinks and sweeping her off of her feet. Not Croz. Pukes-a-lot Croz. If only his ribs would hurry up and heal. Then he could go to the dance and show her a real good time. Bucky tested himself, trying to get out of bed. It was painful, but maybe managable? Just as his first socked foot hit the ground, the curtain swung open and there she was, Y/N.

She went to Bucky's cubile to find he was already getting to his feet. 'Haha! Great minds really do think alike! I was just about to get you for physical therapy.' Bucky looked at her like he was caught with his pants round his ankles. 'Physical therapy?' he questioned. He sat at the edge of his bed, one to look 'non-chalant' and two because he was afraid his legs would gave in from under him with the pain in his side. She smiled at him 'Yeah, didnt the doctors tell you? It's about time we get you up and moving Major! Cant expect you to be in the air if you cant even be on the ground. Come on.' She stepped close to him and held out her hands, waiting for him to take them. He stared. 'Come on, lets go for a walk.' He did want to, but he felt angry. How could she be so kind and nice and smile so beautifully at him when she had just agreed to a date with Crosby. He looked at her, eyes shining and smiling a smile that could probably wrap even Hitler himself around her finger. He gave in and put his hands in hers. It was electric. He never wanted to let go of her perfect, soft hands. He didnt think it was possible, but her smile grew even bigger. Maybe she feels it too. This connection between us. She stepped back, giving him room to stand. He towered over her. She looked up at him, and all Bucky wanted to do was kiss her. All her had to do was bend his neck a bit, tilt his head to the side slightly, and his lips would be on hers. But no, she was Crosbys girl. He was the one going to kiss her. His blood started boiling again at the thought. 'Lets get this over with.' He said with a scowl. The sooner this was over, the sooner he would hopefully be able to stop thinking about her. As if I could ever think of anything but her. He thought. Her smile faltered, not expecting him to be anything other than his charming self.

They made it to the hallway, their steps slow and steady so not to hurt Bucky too much. Y/N tried to be encouraging, often praising him at how well he was doing. But Bucky barely responded. Eventually, she decided the silence was too much. 'Whats your favourite type of cake?' she asked. 'What?' he looked at her confused. 'Cake! Mines chocolate. I absolutely love chocolate cake. Whats your favourite?' 'I don't have a favourite type of cake.' he said. 'You like them all then huh? That's fair. If I'm honest I like all kinds of cake. Except carrot. Carrot and cake should not mix. Everything else is great -' 'I really don't care for or about cake!' Bucky snapped. As soon as he said the words he regretted it. Her bright smile vanished, and she physically recoil from him. She put as much distance between them as she could. Deciding she no longer needed to hold his hands. He immediatly missed the warmth of her hands in his. Longed to grab them back and never let tem go. 'I think you're okay with walking. Turn around back to your bed. I'll be behind you if you need me.' Bucky didnt know what to say, so he just turned around and slowly walked back to his bed. She was right on his heels though, being a good nurse and making sure nothing happened to him. He could sense her hand hovering over his shoulder, ready to catch him if he faltered. She never said a word though. Bucky wanted to break the awkward silence, but how? He had no idea what to say. She helped him back to bed and made a quick exit. 'Anoher nurse will be around later for evening rounds. I'm done for the day.' Without another word she walked off. Bucky cursed himself. He was a dick to her even though she was always kind to him. He would be pushing her even further into Crosby's arms now.

The day turned into evening, the evening into night. Everyone else in the infrimary was asleep, but not Bucky. He didnt know what was keeping him from slumber; the thought of nightmares or the thought of her and Crosby at the dance. Y/N and Croz at that dance is my worst nightmare. Bucky realised. What if they're dancing? He's a terrible dancer. I would be far better at dancing with her. What if they're slow dancing. What if he holds her a little too closely? What if he kisses her? Bucky tried to stop his racing mind before he had a stroke. He looked at the book again. Exactly where she left it. He didnt even want to read it. He knew the story word-for-word by now. He just wanted to hear her read it. That wasnt going to be happening tonight.

Y/N was enjoying the dance. The music was great, and everyone was in good spirits celebrating someones 25th mission. Harry was ever the gentlemen, buying her a drink and making sure she was okay. She liked Harry. He was kind, funny and charming, dispite his issues with air sickness that everyone cruely made fun of him for. She sat at a table with some of the other nurses and a few soldiers. 'Would you like another drink?' Harry asked her, noticing her empty glass. 'Oh I'm fine, thank you Harry.' 'How about a dance?' his hopeful smile was too much for her. 'I'd love to.' They made their way to the dance floor, a lively jazz song being played by the band. Harry wasnt the best dancer, but he had fun and made her have fun too, which was the most important part.

After their dance, Y/N needed to catch her breath. It was then she looked up at the clock and saw the time. 'I didnt realise it was so late! I better get going.' 'I'll walk you home.' Harry said, holding out his elbow to her. 'Oh thats very kind Harry, but theres no need. I'm going to head to the infirmary to check on some patients before I go to bed. You stay with they guys and enjoy the party.' 'Are you sure?' Y/N could sense some dissapointment in his tone, but chose to ignore it with a warm smile. 'I'm sure. Enjoy yourself.' She gave him a kiss on the cheek, and headed for the door. JUst as she was about to leave, she remembered she was meant to grab something...

At midnight he was still awake. He knew the party would be ending soon. He thought of Crosby walking Y/N home. Ever the gent. What if he tried to kiss her? would she accept his kiss? He hoped not. What if she did? He couldnt help picture Harry Crosby with his hands on Y/N, kissing. Hands moving to places he would sell his soul to touch. He was fit to scream. He couldnt hack it. Just when he was about to bang his head against the wall to rid himself of the terrifying mental images, he heard a voice. 'I'm not too late am I?' I'm hallucinating, Bucky thought. The pain meds must be very strong tonight. Y/N stood at the foot of his bed. Wearing a beautiful red dress, hair in flowing waves. Red lipstick he would love to smudge. 'What are you doing here? Weren't you at the dance?' She smiled, 'I was, but when it was almost over I thought I'd come check on you. Not that you deserve it. You were very cranky earlier.' 'I'm sorry Y/N I-' she cut him off 'There's no need to appologise. Physical therapy can be very difficult. Your body has been through a lot it's okay if it takes time to recover.' She was a literal angel. After how poorly he treated her, she still showed him so much empathy. More than he deserved. Even after her date with Croz, here she was checking in on him. 'Thank you. There's no need to check on me though. I'm fine. You should head back.' She moved closer while pulling a paper bag from behind her back. 'The dance is over now. Besides, I think theres about two chapters of Great Gatsby left. I brought some treats for us to eat while we read it.' She pulled out two small pieces of cake from the bag, white frosting on each piece with jam in the middle. 'You wouldn't tell me what kind of cake you liked, turns out it didnt matter because by the time I got to it this was all that was left anyway.' Cake? She had brought him cake? She was at the dance, with another man, and she thought about bringing him cake in the middle of the night? Bucky almost cried. 'You didn't have to do that, thank you. That's very kind.' She looked at the chair next to his bed. Her back already hurt before she even sat on it. 'Do you mind moving over a little? That chair is horrendous.'

Bucky was sure he heard her wrong. She wanted to sit in the bed with him? He stuttered out a response as he slowly moved as much as he could in the small bed. 'Sure, be my guest.' She sat beside him with her back againt the headboard. The sides of their bodies touching from their shoulders to their ankles. If Bucky's heart wasnt racing before, it was now. She handed him his piece of cake and picked up the book. 'It was when curiosity about Gatsby was at its highest that the lights in his house failed to go on one Saturday night....' She read to him, occasionally taking a break to bite into her cake. They sat like that, eating and reading, with Bucky never taking his eyes off of her beautiful face. Slowly, his tired eyes fluttered closed. He dreamed of cake, Gatsby's mansion, and her.

[dynamic-k]

Are you tired of this yet? I feel like I keep asking questions about Vic, but it's because I already know that information for the other characters... Vague Vic.

Anyways, I think you said in a comment that Vic has trauma from Primal stabbing him in the back (that was obvious but im still gonna say it). How does he deal with this? Does he have nightmares? Does Dune or the guards suspect anything?

Does anyone else, like Primal, Agent, Hazard, Ballista, RGBY, Purple etc. also have trauma? If so, how do they deal with it, and do they also have nightmares?

I think somewhere in Arc 2, when Chosen, Second and Dark meet Primal and Ballista, Primal says she was going to visit Vic. How did this go?

Have a nice day (it HAS been over 24 hrs)

-R

See this is why people should send me more asks. I'm going to spoil or spill things. XD Sometimes I cannot keep my mouth shut about my own creations.

Vague Vic indeed! I laughed a little too hard at that- <3

:D Vic can have trauma. As a treat. Cause why not- /silly

[ I'll include a little snippet for Arc Two at the end of this ask, in relation to Vic's trauma and a Primal visitation. ]

Vic does indeed have nightmares, I will say that much. But I shouldn't try and explain this too in-depth, as I will be elaborating on the super fine specifics of Vic's nightmares and how Dune would react to it and such, in the storyline and in the plot itself when it comes to that point in time.

Dune will have some involvement, yes. The guards too, some of them, but to a lesser degree. [in only one or two different scenes.] Dune, on the other hand, has multiple encounters with Vic in which the grey hollowhead is much closer to a breakdown than he would otherwise be.

:) Ah, Purple. Ehehe. EHEHEHHEHE. I shouldn't say too much about that. Let's just say, Purple's lore is a little all over the place, and even I am still trying to sift it out into chronological order. Anything I could say that comes to mind right now is a huge spoiler so, I can't say too much aside from I can't say too much.

Primal is actually trauma-free for the most part, and by that I mean, she obviously regrets nearly killing Vic, and it sticks [*cough!*] with her for a long time... but the most actual reaction she endured was nearly puking just afterward of the Stabby Scene, which was covered already in Arc One's climax.

Hm. Yeah.

Definitely trauma-free. [compared to the others, ehehe]

Agent doesn't have nightmares, neither does Hazard, and both are generally content and happy with their current positions.

Agent is running Rocket, finding out he's really good at it. Hazard is assisting trainees for the Rocket Hero program, and occasionally helping out of the field where the public eye is abundant.

But Agent doesn't like to remember the day he got his life-altering injury. It's not a day he remembers as a day of celebrating, even if he was incredibly heroic. Hazard has been a great help, assisting Agent so he can see himself in a more positive light than he would think independently... but it can be a struggle on some bad days where everything Agent does seems to go utterly wrong. And especially now, being in an important position and having more responsibility that could be screwed up.

Not me giving Agent some occasional self-loathing issues because I want to help others work through it. U v U Also good angst.

Ballista is the one who is actually trauma-free. He just a happy lil dude. XD Worst he's got is Primal stole his snacks. He does help Primal through her mild outbursts though. The days where all she can do is rant to the air and lay her head on the table and spill every regret into the empty air where Ballista stands as comfortingly as he can.

See, now- The Color Gang's trauma-

...I should not be talking about Arc Three so early into Arc Two-

I have plans. Wait and see. >:3

-

"I think somewhere in Arc 2, when Chosen, Second and Dark meet Primal and Ballista, Primal says she was going to visit Vic. How did this go?"

She did indeed say this, but it has not happened yet. It's plot heavy enough that I shouldn't say too much, since I'll be covering it as an event in the storyline, once I get that far in.

You have a nice day tooo!!! :DDD You've made me so happy with these asks, I am having an absolute blast answering them!! hehe

And now for the small snippet:

It's a very minor sneak peak [spoiler?] of a scene I am still writing.

-

“Vic.”

Vic's head jerked instantly behind him and he met her eyes with a speed that rivaled her quickening heartbeat at the anxiousness of what she planned to do.

“Primal,” Vic breathed out slowly, his shoulders relaxing greatly and his features smoothing out into a calm and more peaceful outward appearance. 

Primal did notice his eyes still held just the faintest traces of wariness, but she didn't bring attention to it. 

She had stabbed him, after all. It made sense Vic couldn't seem to help automatically being aware and alert as a result. 

-

-

See~? Trauma! :D /smile-of-insanity

[coffee-without-anesthetics]

as a follow up to my All-Knowing And All-Agony translation, here be Tear Drop, from japanese to french back to english! translated by yours confidently

in order to shorten this post, only lyrics different enough from the english ones are included. this one doesn't have much going on anyways

if you want to use this translation anywhere, i wish to be credited!

side note: since yuno uses both the singular (+informal) "you" and the plural (+formal) "you" in this, i'll make all plural "you"s pink, and all singular "you"s orange

The wanted wanting the wanter The overlap, isn’t that some sort of perfection? -> The ones asking, and the ones being asked for -> By uniting (assembling together), it's perfect isn't it?

“Poor naive little girl”? So off the mark, what’s it to you? It’s just absurd -> "My poor naive little one" -> You're completely off the mark, and besides, what does it concern you? Ridiculous [1]

Like really, who do you think you are? -> [unchanged + plural you]

Don’t weigh me measure me against your morality Just shut it, will you? You know it all Feeling magnanimous? INNOCENT? I’m so not that Just shut it, will you? You know it all -> Don't measure me with your ridiculous morals -> You, who think you know everything, shut up -> Glad you declared me INNOCENT? That's so not me -> You, who think you know everything, shut up

Caressing me with your “Good girl” Who needs your self-righteous pardon? -> Your "good girl"s, just like your touches and your "sorry"s full of self-satisfaction [2] -> I don't want any of them

I’m the one who chose, let you and you and you all in Happy or sad? Why decide? Where’d you get your half-baked sense of justice So nauseating…so creepy…will you please disappear “Phew. Anyway!” -> It's me who chose them. I accepted you, you, you and you -> Joy or sadness, why do you decide? -> Where did you take your failed sense of justice from? [3] -> Pff… you disgust me, I wanna puke (from it), come on, get lost [4] -> "Well. Let's move on!" [5]

If you want “me”, come marco, I’ll polo Let’s just do it, please smile? Hooked up till the morning to this sweet “Umbilical Cable” Let’s just do it, please smile? -> Those who want "me", come here [6] -> Come on, we're starting, you'll give me a smile? [7] -> Linked until morning with this gentle umbilical cord -> Come on, we're starting, you'll give me a smile?

Desire, bestow, and desire again The episode reloading on an endless loop The fading warmth makes me anxious again Tear drops succumb and fall -> [unchanged] -> From recharge to recharge, this episode without end -> The warmth flees (me) and leaves me in anxiety/anxious -> A tear falls

here be the notes. many of them but most are small things

literally "Does it watch you?". Outside of "what does it concern you?", can also be translated as "what's it to you", "This doesn't concern you", etc.

very very minor thing, it's not "good girl" but "good little one"

"failed" here (foireux) feels to me like "prone to failure" more than "failed". could also be translated as "messed-up" or "shitty"

she's way more direct with the insult ("allez dégagez"). it's in the imperative mood, no softening, straight up "go away, i dont want to see you anymore"

literally "We're moving on to something else!"

literally "Come until here", implies more effort on the recipient's part imo

not a big difference but the lyrics, without adapting to fit english, are "You give me a smile?" (Tu me donnes un sourire?). it's sweeter in french, i suppose

[jatpsometimes]

A "small" analysis into what killed the boys Part Two: Electric Boogaloo

Having already unprofessionally scienced my way through the food poisoning theory (which was based off of the wiki, just sayin') I am back yet again to science my way through the battery acid theory.

Now, dear JATP tumblr, I know a few of you mentioned on the last post that you wanna use this for fanfics, and to that I say go right ahead! In fact, I will attempt to add as much information as necessary. If you wanna scroll straight to the death info, just go to the green.

So firstly, Alex can be quoted in S1:E1 "Wake Up" as having called the vehicle they took their condiments and dressings for the street dogs out of as an Oldsmobile. This Oldsmobile can be identified by both the shape of the back of the car (4:32) and the ambulance scene where you can also see the Olds-mobile (4:36).

See it on the left?

From my searching, this appears to be an '86 Oldsmobile Cutlass (assuming Alex wasn't just calling it old, but oldsmobile went out of business in 2004 so I think we can assume he means the make). For your own personal choice, I'll attach photos of what google tells me is an '86 oldsmobile. I will also add that I know 0 things about cars so if this is inaccurate, I apologise in advance.

See the tail lights and shape of the back of the car? Go compare it to the times if you want.

Death analysis starts here!

Now that I've solidified the ads i'm getting for the next month, we can move onto the battery itself, and how the boy's death may have panned out. Since this is a Battery Acid theory, I'll talk about what Battery Acid actually is.

sulfuric acid (H₂SO₄) - a strong acid made by oxidizing solutions of sulphur dioxide and used in large quantities as an industrial and laboratory reagent. The concentrated form is an oily (note that for later), dense, corrosive liquid.

Fun fact about sulfuric acid - It has a pH of 0.5. For comparison, stomach acid usually has a pH of 1.5 - 3.5. If you haven't a clue what pH is, its basically (get it, basic?) How acidic or basic/alkaline a substance is. 0 is strongly acidic, 7 is neutral (so like water) and 14 is strongly basic/alkaline.

Another interesting point to mention, which I personally believe is quite interesting, is, according to Wikipedia, Sulfuric acid is often found in Anti-Rust products. What did Mr.Death Vendor say about Alex getting pickle juice on the Battery cables? "It'll help with the rust." Assuming Alex accidentally dropped a pickle onto the cables, then picked it back up again and put it on his soon-to-be-eaten death dog, it's fairly likely that his pickles were contaminated with Anti-Rust chemicals. Assuming other people possibly did this too, and put the pickles BACK, hoping to get away with it, it's very likely it contaminated the other toppings.

Equally, it's likely that the battery leaked, and through whatever freak accident (we already know this hot dog stand was unsanitary, okay?), and contaminated the toppings that way, presumably by someone dropping a pickle into the juice. Battery Acid being oily and all that, it would be easy to assume it was just grease from the Hot dog.

So anyways, however it got there, being stronger than the average stomach acid, Sulfuric acid will likely damage the epithelial cells, which protect the stomach lining. This would have created gastric ulcers (which are anecdotally a nightmare). This would lead to bleeding, and so will lead into my next point.

According to mountsinai.org, symptoms of sulfuric acid poisoning include: Breathing difficulty due to throat swelling, burns in the mouth and throat, drooling, fever, rapid development of low blood pressure (shock), severe pain in the mouth and throat, speech problems, vomiting with blood and vision loss.

Imagine, if you will, Bobby coming up to find the boys before their performance, and finding the three of them either puking blood, unable to breathe or unable speak. Imagine if, in their last moments, they couldn't see or speak to Bobby, they could only hear him screaming for help, all three entirely unable to comfort him. Or maybe he was silent in shock, and so all of them, to this day, are unaware of what that poor boy witnessed that night.

So, entirely, the Battery Acid/ Sulfuric Acid theory is almost doubly more horrifying than the E-Coli Food Poisoning theory, which I will link below if you wanna check that out. Anyways, this is yet again my unprofessional opinion, I am not a specialist in this subject and this entirely internet research.

TL;DR: Sulfuric Acid Poisoning may have killed the boys.

[nerdythebard]

#3: Ah Muzen Cab, God of Bees

Hello again, gods and goddesses!

This time, we focus on a very unusual figure. I'll be(e) honest, I had no idea there was a separate function as the God of Bees, but apparently, several ancient religions do have somebody for that specific task. Plus, there is surprisingly very little information on Ah Muzen Cab, who holds that position in the Maya pantheon, but when you think about it, it actually makes sense: honey was believed to have medicinal properties, it has an almost infinite shelf life, and is used as the main ingredient for mead... no wonder people would think of bees as divine creatures and honey as a sacred food. Sure, why not. Let's see what all the buzz is about!

Next time: When there's no more room in hell...

Now, let's set up some goals for this build. What do we need to make Ah Muzen Cab sting:

Bees: Goes without saying, what's a god without his minions? We gotta get those lil' buzzers somehow;

High Movement Speed: Pretty obvious, you're a bee god, you gotta zoom around;

High Attack Speed: Your sting stings and many stings sting even better. Let's make sure we can get a few extra hits on our turn;

Honey: Bees are cute and their puke is delicious. We have to include it somehow.

When it comes to Ah Muzen Cab's race, there were several options. I could've made him a Simic Hybrid for the nice carapace feature; or maybe a Gith, to reference his mysterious origins; at some point, I believe I even considered a winged Tiefling... but luckily, Wizards of the Coast came to my rescue with their latest Unearthed Arcana 2021: Folk of the Feywild.

Ah Muzen Cab is a Fairy. He's not the largest of gods in SMITE, so making him a size Small shouldn't be an issue. Fairies get a ground speed AND flying speed of 30 feet each, and a +2 and +1 to two stats of your choice; let's go with +2 Wisdom and +1 Dexterity. Instead of humanoid, we're now considered Fey creature type, and we have innate, unlimited flight ability (with hovering). We know Common language and one more of our choice (I suggest Sylvan) and we get the Fairy Magic feature, which gives us two spells from the start: Druidcraft, a cantrip that lets us interact with nature in one way or another (by for example opening flower pods, making them bloom, creating harmless sensory effects, etc.), and Faerie Fire, which marks everything in a 20-foot cube range with a bright aura, essentially preventing invisibility if a creature fails the saving throw (it's normally Dexterity, but we can pick Wisdom here, and so we shall). Another curious ability is Fey Passage, which allows us to squeeze through an opening even 1 inch wide.

For Ah Muzen Cab's background, to reflect his solitude and mystery around his very being, we're gonna pick the Hermit. We get proficiency in Medicine and Religion skills, proficiency in Herbalism Kit and we get to learn one language of our choice. We're now prepared to gather pollen and make our own honey. We also get the Discovery feature, which means we possess a particularly important piece of information. It honestly can be anything, from a crucial part of the campaign's plot to something more personal (for example 1001 recipes involving honey).

ABILITY SCORES

For the quick and nimble Ah Muzen Cab, Dexterity will be our first stat. We will be a caster in some degree, and our casting ability is going to be Wisdom. Follow that up with Constitution, for some Hit Points, then Strength and Charisma, and finally we'll dump Intelligence.

CLASS

We have yet another no-multiclass build. Ah Muzen Cab is going to be(e) nature-themed, quick, and ready to deal a plethora of ranged damage. He's a Ranger (Revised) start-to-finish.

As a Ranger, our Hit Dice is a d10. We start with Hit Points of 10 + our CON modifier, proficiency with light armour, medium armour and shields, as well as simple weapons and martial weapons. For Ah Muzen Cab, I think we should go with studded leather armour and a hand crossbow to mimic his carapace and stinger. We don't get proficiencies with any tools, and our saving throws are Strength and Dexterity. We get to choose three class skills, I'd say Animal Handling, Perception, and Survival fit Ah Muzen Cab's personality best.

---

Level 1: We start this build by choosing our Favoured Enemy. That's right, using the power of fantasy racism we can select a type of creature we are most effective against. We have an option of being the natural enemy of beasts, fey, humanoids, monstrosities, or undead. I'd say to choose either humanoids or fey, but this is to be adjusted to the campaign played. What's important is that we gain +2 damage against the chosen enemy type, we have an advantage on Survival checks related to tracking an enemy of said type, and Intelligence checks to recall any information about that type. We also get another language of our choice.

Another 1st-level feature we get is called Natural Explorer. As a master of the wilderness, we receive various benefits:

We can ignore any difficult terrain;

We have an advantage on initiative rolls;

On our first turn of combat, we have an advantage against enemies that hadn't acted yet.

Additionally, we grant the following benefits if we travel for an hour or more:

Difficult terrain doesn't slow our group's travel;

The group cannot be lost (unless by magic);

Even if we're engaged in some activity while travelling (foraging, tracking, etc.), we cannot be surprised by enemies;

If we're travelling alone, we can move stealthily at a regular pace;

We find twice as much food while foraging;

While tracking creatures, we learn their exact size, numbers, and how long ago they were at our current location.

Level 2: At this level, we get to learn some spells. Although we don't get any cantrips, nor can we cast ritual spells, there are a few tricks that will enhance our build. Wisdom is our spellcasting ability and we begin with two 1st-level spell slots and we learn two 1st-level spells: Alarm lets us put a 20-foot cube under magical surveillance for 8 hours. If any undesignated creature enters the cube, we are notified of the intrusion. We can flavour this spell by creating a small hive with bees buzzing around the perimeter. Hunter's Mark puts a target on one enemy for 1 hour (or until our concentration is broken); until the spell ends, the marked enemy receives extra 1d6 damage and we get an advantage on any Perception or Survival checks we roll in order to find it. If the enemy dies while marked, we can spend a bonus action to mark another creature.

At this level, we also get to pick our Fighting Style and Close Quarters Shooter lets us eliminate the disadvantage while shooting at a target that's within our melee range. We also ignore half-covers and three-quarters covers within 30 feet, and we get +1 to our ranged attack rolls.

Level 3: Our bond with nature deepens at this level. We get the Primeval Awareness feature; we can establish some basic-level communication with a non-hostile beast - we can learn of its emotional state, or if it's under any magical influence. Additionally, we can spend a minute of concentration to detect our Favoured Enemy within 5 miles of our current position.

This is also the level at which we pick our subclass and the Swarmkeeper Conclave finally lets us get our bees!

Our Gathered Swarm is a buzzing bundle of bees, which stays with us until we die. On each of our turns in combat, the Swarm can assist us in various ways. After we successfully hit the enemy:

The enemy receives additional 1d6 piercing damage;

The enemy has to succeed on a Strength saving throw, or be moved by our Swarm up to 15 feet horizontally in any direction;

We can be moved by our Swarm up to 5 feet horizontally in any direction.

We also gain access to Swarmkeeper's Magic feature, which grants us extra spells when reaching specific levels. At the 3rd level, we'd get Faerie Fire but we already know it because of our racial features. So we either forget about it or ask our DM if we could replace it with an extra 1st-level Ranger spell.

We also get another spell: Ensnaring Strike is applied to our ranged attack. On a successful hit, the enemy has to make a Strength saving throw or be restrained up to 1 minute (or until the concentration is broken) by magical thorny vines sprouting from the ground... or perhaps a puddle of extra-sticky honey? While restrained by the spell, suffers 1d6 piercing damage at the beginning of their turn (perhaps some bees hide within the honey and sting them).

Level 4: We get our first Ability Score Improvement! Let's raise our Constitution by 2 points, to get some more Hit Points later on. Survivability is important for the quick and nimble ones.

Level 5: At this level, we get our first subclass upgrade and it's... Extra Attack. We can now attack twice instead of once during a single action. It helps with our target goals, so it's good.

We also gain access to 2nd-level spell slots. Animal Messenger lets you select a critter and charm it to act as your courier for the next 24 hours. You speak a short message (up to 25 words) and describe a target and the creature does its best to deliver your words. I don't need to tell you what kind of creature to use, right?

Your Swarmkeeper's Magic feature also gives you an extra spell: Web fills a 20-foot cube space with sticky webbing. Creatures caught in the web must succeed on a Dexterity saving throw or be restrained. Once again, we flavour web as honey and we're good to go.

Level 6: Our power of Fantasy Racism grows even stronger with Greater Favoured Enemy. We can pick another type of creatures to gain advantages against. This time, we get to choose from aberrations, celestials, constructs, dragons, elementals, fiends, or giants. We once again learn another language, and our bonus damage against both types of Favoured Enemies changes to a +4. Once again, choose whatever suits the campaign best.

Level 7: Time for another subclass upgrade. Writhing Tide lets our Swarm form a pair of wings around us, giving us flying speed of 10 feet for 1 minute. This ability seems a bit pointless, since we have a much better one from our racial background, so I would consider asking the DM if we can apply this for our party members and give them some slow flight instead.

For this level's spell, I think we should get Healing Spirit - we call upon a nature spirit (gee, I wonder what form it would take) to reside in a 5-foot space. If we or our allies movie into that space, or start our turn there, we get 1d6 points of healing. The spirit can heal only 1 + [our spellcasting modifier] number of times and disappears after the final healing. As a bonus action, we can move the spirit up to 30 feet to a space we can see.

Level 8: Another ASI! Let's put one point in Constitution and one in Wisdom.

At this level we also get Fleet of Foot, which lets us use the Dash action as a bonus action.

Level 9: We get access to 3rd-level spells: Conjure Barrage lets us magically multiply a projectile we shot. Each creature in a 60-foot cone must make a Dexterity saving throw or take 3d8 points of damage (half on a successful save), the type of which is the same as the projectile used.

We get another spell from our Swarmkeeper's Magic feature: Gaseous Form transforms us or whoever we touch into a cloud of smoke (or perhaps pollen). While in cloud form:

We have flying speed of 10 feet;

We can occupy another creature's space;

We have advantage on non-magical damage;

We have advantage on Strength, Dexterity, and Constitution saving throws;

We can slip through cracks and narrow openings;

If we're stunned or incapacitated mid-air, we don't fall.

While in this form, we cannot speak, use items, attack, or cast spells.

Level 10: At the midway point we get Hide in Plain Sight, which helps us hide so well we reach Drax levels of invisibility

When we choose to Hide, we can decide to not use any movement on our turn. If we do so, any creature that attempts to detect us receives a -10 to their Perception check until the end of our next turn. As long as we do not move, we can use this feature indefinitely.

Level 11: Another subclass feature! The Mighty Swarm feature gives us more bees than before. The damage dealt by our Swarm increases from d6 to d8; if a target fails their saving throw against being moved by our Swarm, they are also knocked prone; when we are moved by our Swarm, we get the benefit of half-cover until the start of our next turn.

We also get another 3rd-level spell: Protection from Energy gives us, or any creature we touch, resistance to one damage type of choice - acid, cold, fire, lightning, or thunder - for up to 1 hour (or until our concentration is broken).

Level 12: Time for another ASI! Let's raise our Dexterity by two points.

Level 13: We don't get new class features, but we do unlock 4th-level spells; Grasping Vine creates a wiggly plant tendril in a point within 30 feet from you, which can be directed to lash at a target within 30 feet from it. The target has to make a Dexterity saving throw or be pulled 20 feet towards the vine.

We also get another Swarmkeeper spell: Arcane Eye creates an invisible magical beacon that we can use to scout our surroundings for up to 1 hour (or until our concentration is broken). As an action we can move the Eye up to 30 feet without any distance limit; although it cannot enter other planes of existence, or pass through solid barriers, it can enter through an opening even 1 inch wide.

Level 14: We get to put a little extra sneaky to our build with Vanish. This allows us to take the Hide action as a bonus action (which pairs really well with our Hide in Plain Sight).

Level 15: For our final subclass upgrade, we get Swarming Dispersal. When we take damage, we can use a reaction to transform our body into a swarm of bees for the best representation of Naruto's Substitution Jutsu.

We gain resistance to the damage dealt to us and we teleport into an unoccupied space within 30 feet of where we started. We can use this ability the number of times equal to our proficiency bonus and we regain all uses when finishing a long rest.

We get to pick another 4th-level spell: we use Locate Creature to name a creature familiar to us and learn their location as long as they're within 1.000 feet from us. If the creature is moving, we will detect that as long as they don't live that range.

Level 16: We get another ASI! Let's cap our Dexterity with those two extra points.

Level 17: Here we unlock our spellcasting limit - 5th-level spells: Swift Quiver is a bonus action spell that turns our ammo supply into the infinite quiver of Legolas. For 1 minute (or until concentration is broken) on each of our turns, we can take a bonus action to make two additional attacks with ammo from our quiver. Combined with our Extra Attack, this lets us attack one target four times during our turn for 1d6+5 piercing damage.

Level 18: We get a feature called Feral Senses, which helps when fighting invisible enemies; when we attack something we cannot see we no longer get disadvantage on attack rolls. We are also aware of any invisible creatures within 30 feet of us, provided we're not blinded or deafened and the creature isn't using its Hide action.

Level 19: Final ASI of the build. Let's round-up our Wisdom into 18, and with one point to spare we can't do much so allocate it wherever.

We also learn our final spell for the build: Steel Wind Strike lets us do a flourish with our melee weapon, and turn it into an invisible blade of slashiness. Up to five creatures within 30 feet of us have to make a Dexterity saving throw or take 6d10 force damage. Additionally, we can choose to teleport within 5 feet of one of the targets that we hit or miss.

Level 20: For our capstone we get Foe Slayer: once on each of our turns, we can add our Wisdom modifier to the attack roll or the damage roll of an attack we make.

---

Now, let's see what came out from this build for Ah Muzen Cab.

I think we've reached all of our goals. We got our bees, we've got honey-flavour in some abilities, we get extra Movement Speed with Dash as a bonus action... we even get a good Attack Speed with Extra Attack and Swift Quiver.

Our Spell Save DC is 18, AC is 17 if paired with the studded leather armour, and we've on average 164 Hit Points.

Unfortunately, our Intelligence and Charisma scores are pretty low so any checks and saving throws involving those might give us trouble. We are also pretty much range-oriented, with just +1 in Strength.

But that's it! Hopefully you guys enjoyed this ride, and I'll see you for the next one!

Nerdy out!

[gammaprimesmw]

5 Random Nostalgic Albums

I'm sitting here, listening to the Backstreet Boys' Millennium album and reminiscing on a time when my younger sister had it on heavy rotation. While I was obsessing over Beast Wars and getting curious about G1, she was obsessing over the Backstreet Boys like most girls her age in 1999. What 15-going-on-16-year-old girl watches Beast Wars, and what 13-year-old didn't love the Backstreet Boys...or *NSYNC? I went both ways, but had to pick *NSYNC because the Backstreet Boys were my sister's, especially AJ. Anyway, here are 4 other randomly-picked albums that make me nostalgic.

1. Alanis Morissette - Jagged Little Pill

This album was a staple of the summer of 1996 for my sisters and I. There were at least 3 copies of the album in my family. One was my then-stepfather's CD, which he would put on for us if he was in a good enough mood. The second was a taped copy he made for me to listen to on my own time. Yeah, cassettes were still in use in my household in the mid 90s. The third was my older sister's copy, which we would listen to when spending weekends with my biological father. Jagged Little Pill takes me back to a time when I obsessed over Star Wars, played the original Game Boy until the batteries ran low, and lost many a game of Rummy to my younger sister. Yeah, we played actual card games with actual cards. We didn't get our first computer until 1999.

2. SWV - It's About Time

The same sister who rocked Alanis in the summer of 96 had this album on heavy rotation just 3 summers prior. She had it on cassette, but only listened to the side with Weak since that was her favorite song. About a year later, when she got a CD player, she gave all her tapes to me, including that one. It was probably the one I played the most, and I listened to both sides. I don't remember if I lost the tape or wore it out, but I eventually had to replace it. That copy would get ruined when I tried to fill in the dead air with another song, only to tape on the wrong side. I got a third copy eventually, which included a version of the Anything Old Skool Mix. That became my favorite song on the album for a while. That copy got lost in a move, and it would be years before I'd get another copy. This one would be on CD. SWV is one of my favorite bands, and this was the album to introduce me to them.

3. MTV Party to Go Volume 2

Like SWV, this is an album I discovered through my older sister. She got this on cassette as a Christmas present back in 1992, and that tape was on heavy rotation as 92 gave way to 93. I remember thinking that the opening track, Enigma's Sadeness Part 2, was in some African language. Not sure why though. Maybe it's because I was only 9 years old at the time. Either way, this album served as our introduction to the Party to Go series, which is probably my favorite compilation/mix series out there.

4. Spice Girls - Spice

"I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want. What I really, really want is you to turn that off!"

Ahh...the stories one can tell about staying home from from school due to being sick...The quote above came from my mom during one such occasion. I had my tape of this album going when she came into my room, either to give me some ice chips or take away some dirty laundry. I don't remember which. I do remember it being a possible stomach bug or bad reaction to Fat Free Cool Whip. Either way, it involved puking. Listening to Spice Girls could put a smile on my face back then whether I was sick or not, even if it annoyed my mom. Years later, I'd toss the tape when I lost interest in the Spice Girls, only to regain interest in them in mid-2017. I think it was triggered by something my mom found on Axs TV. Either way, it lead to me streaming the album on Spotify for the next year before ordering a copy on CD. Unfortunately, the CD was not in its advertixed "Very Good" condition. It skipped so bad on some songs, including one of my favorites, that said songs became unplayable. After getting a second bad CD from the same seller, I stopped buying from them.

[drkcnry67]

just open the box...

title: just open the box!

pairing: Jensen x reader

fluff: pregnancy

tags: having another morning of not being able to eat your normal breakfast, Jensen being at work when this is happening, you keeping this from jensen till you had answers, announcing your pregnancy to Jensen in the most creative way. 

rating: pg-13

mentioning @spnfluffbingo​    &   @sweetness47​

fluff list   part 1   part 2   part 3   part 4

it was another morning, it was another morning of you sitting with your head over the toilet puking your guts out. this was not a good start to being back from disney. actually this happened twice while at disney. 

all through the rest of the day you felt amazing. you were okay and happy. but something still felt off. disney where the love of your life met you and then just a month ago proposed to you in the most romantic way possible. 

you wouldnt have ever suspected what would happen next. if nothing else this would be the most surprising news ever. a few days later you had a doctor appointment, this was a monthly occurance for you, you had a checkup before you left on vacation to disney and you were now having your followup to that. 

Fredrick: how was your vacation?

Fredrick: well I'll order a ultrasound as well we need to get to the bottom of this I just want to rule out one possible thing. dont worry though it will be a happy thing if im correct.

YN: it was amazing! my boyfriend proposed to me right where we first met and now we are happily living in our condo and we are painting all the rooms to fit us as a couple. 

Fredrick: congratulations on the engagement. Now I'm gonna run some blood work, any thing you want to tell me?

YN: actually yes. Off and on these last few weeks I've not been able to eat my normal breakfast. I vomit most mornings and can barely function for a few moments. After that tho I'm fine.

fredrick brings over a machine and some gel.

Fredrick: can you please roll up your shirt to expose your abdomen and unbutton your jeans as well. so i can place the gel and start the machine. 

you do so and feel no shady feelings cause its your doctor. this is just another test its nothing to panic about. you were more concerned about your health. 

fredrick: well interesting. you must be about 9 weeks. its gonna be a long next few months. we will set up your next few appointments including ultra sounds x3 and a few check up here and there. 

YN: just say it... i wont be able to start processing this until i hear you say it. 

Fredrick: congratulations YN! you are Pregnant!

the words rang in your ears, the doctor handed you a cloth to wipe off the remaining gel and left you a moment to process and place your shirt down and do up your jeans. 

fredrick: sign these forms before you leave and make sure that you keep track of those dates those are your follow-ups and your next 2 ultrasounds.

You read the papers and sign the areas your meant too. fredrick hands you 8 appointment cards.

Fredrick: again my sincerest congratulations. we will see you at your next appointment. 

you leave the doctor office and go out to the car. you were about to text jensen, but then you thought of a different way to tell him. you went on your way to the store, you were unsure of the reaction from Jensen but you would try to make the best of this as well. 

arriving at the store you grabbed a cart. you went to the areas you needed to, a small shop spree was in order. you needed time to process. you had a small list in your head, you needed to make sure that you got those ones along with anything else you think you would need. 

once you got home you went inside and got into something fun. you put the box together, you placed the box on the table, you placed a baby blanket on the bottom. then a pair of small shoes, a bib, a hat and a sign that says guess what...

you could only hope that Jensen figures it out on his own before you have to say something. you now just had to wait for Jensen to arrive home before the surprise would be underway. 

Jensen walked through the door a few hours later to find you in the kitchen with pie on the counter and watching a disney movie. he came up to the counter. 

Jensen: whats the occasion?

YN: what makes you think there is a special occassion?

Jensen: cause your baking enough to feed an army. 

YN: maybe i just want to make sure we have enough for snacks through the week. 

Jensen: i can tell when something is up... now what is it?

your eyes drifted to the box, the announcement that would change your lives. you went to sit on Jensen’s lap... 

Jensen: whats that...

YN: its for you... its my way of telling you something that i am still processing. open it please

Jensen: but what is it...

YN: jensen ackles, just open the box... then tell me what you think it means

Jensen while you sat on his lap opened the box, his eyes looking around at everything in the box. he ran his fingers over each item then he read the words, “GUESS WHAT???” 

then he realized what this was, what this meant. he picked up the little pair of baby booties, he placed them to your belly.

Jensen: is it true?

YN: i just found out today... im about 9 weeks.  i wanted to text you but i figured this would be a better solution more happy, more excited. and we could celebrate the news. please say something...

Jensen: we are pregnant... we are gonna have a child. our first of many i hope... this is by far... the best news i have heard all damn day! 

Jensen picked you up and spun you around. Jensen kissed you as your slippers went flying and the sound your cheers could be heard through the entire apartment.

~epilogue coming soon. not apart of bingo unless the next round of fluff comes out soon.~

[stateofgrace1303]

My chronic illness, how it started.

*Can you guys please reblog and/or tag Taylor?? I really want her to read

this. I want this to get to her and I'll take any help I can get. I rarely ask this but it'd mean to world to me. I wanna get my story

out there (even if this is only a part of the entire story. The rest I

might post sometime if you guys want me too. I think I did include

everything I wanted to for now though). Just thank you all so much!!! I

love you all ❤*

(Im really sorry about how long this is. Its like a little novel. Plus I'm

OCD and tend to talk/rant until it feels just right... I just wanted to

share it with all of you, since its something I would've shared on TSL,

even though it'd probably be too long for there... But I wanted to share it

here because most of those swifties can be found on tumblr, and I want you

all to hear this... Maybe it'll even get to Taylor too. But please read if

you can. It'd mean a lot to me. Also I tried writing this but then it got

deleted when I tried posting it, so hopefully this one posts (I ended up trying to post this ALL DAY. I'm so glad it's finally up).)

Hey Swifties! So, I thought I would post this because its something I'd

post on TSL if it was still around, as I shared pretty much my whole life

on there, and I always found swifties very easy to talk to (plus you're all

just the nicest people)! So, I wanted to share this on here since most

swifties can be found on tumblr. I'm sure i talked a little bit about this

on tsl (my user was stateofgrace1303, same as on here and ig) but I wanted

to tell you guys more, especially because its getting so much more intense

now and like I said I've always found swifties very easy to talk to you.

Basically, when I was 12, my dad took me to see the RED tour at Gillette

Stadium. We had gone to see the Speak Now tour there and I had been

completely wonderstruck (no pun intended) by Taylor that night. I was 10 at

the speak now tour and had idolized Taylor since I was 6 and she put out

TOMG (and I was known as the Taylor Swift girl by now at my school). So

even though I was 10 I asked my dad, if I save up the money will you take

me to see her when she comes again? And he said yes. About 2 weeks before

the show, I had saved up enough. He didn't think i could do it, but I did.

So, I got tickets and we went to the tour. But when I was walking towards

the stadium (we had parked in a lot right down the street), my vision

became weird, almost like tunnel vision although nothing was turning black

around the edges of my vision. My feet looked very far away from me.

Suddenly, a rush of dizziness came over me and instinctively i grabbed onto

my dads arm to keep from falling down. He asked if I was okay and I could

barely get out words for some reason. I was starting to sweat and we

thought maybe i was dehydrated, so we got into the stadium as quickly as

possible. I was gripping onto everything around me to keep from falling,

but eventually we got into the stadium and I got some water. We had seats

on the field, so that's where I was, drinking some water when suddenly I

was pretty sure I was going to throw up. It was starting to get super

uncomfortable so my dad brought my to the first aid, which was actually

right at the enterance on the field. So when we went in there my dad told

them what was going on and they all looked at me weird and said "people

never get sick. We usually treat bee stings and allergic reactions. We

almost never have people get sick" which actually surprised me. But, they

took me back and laid me down. Almost immediately I started puking. The

nurse I had actually had just had a baby and had some anti nausea

medication on her. So, she gave me that but it didn't work. And I just got

worse. My dad went to find me something to eat so I'd have something in my

stomach. He came back with some chips and iced/frozen lemonade but I threw

up every time. I was so dizzy at this point I was gripping onto the bed

they had me on and puking my guts out, as well as sweating a lot. After a

while, as it only got worse, they actually thought I might have had food

posioning and asked what I ate. But there they noticed something. I was

completely white. Like white as a ghost. Except for my lips, which were

turning blue. And I was struggling to breathe. They wanted to take me to

Boston Childrens and my dad asked if I wanted to, but it was Taylor. I

couldn't miss it. So I said no for that reason. But actually, everyone at

the stadium was trying to get me tickets for the show the next night as she

was playing two nights. Security guards, the nurses, my dads girlfriend...

But nobody could get tickets in the end which was okay. But later my dad

went and for a list of everybody's set times. I had been in first aid for

about an hour at this point. He came back with the list and said "I promise

I will not let you miss them" he said and pointed to Ed Sheerans name, then

Taylor, since I was a huge Ed fan as well. He knew I probably wouldn't be

able to stay, but even seeing them for a minute would've been perfect to

me. Another hour had passed, and I was still there in the same condition.

It was terrifying, and they were really pushing me to go to the hospital

(they wanted to call an ambulance because they actually thought something

very bad might happen if they didn't). But I keep pushing that off because

I wanted to see Taylor and Ed so badly. But, 2 hours I had been there in

the same condition, puking up everything, completely white with blue lips,

struggling to breathe, so dizzy I couldn't even sit up. It was starting to

get painful honestly. So, I suddenly just burst out crying. I was just a 12

year old who wanted to see my idol, and I got this... This weird sickness,

and got stuck in first aid. In so much pain. I didn't even really

understand what was happening. I had always been a sick kid. Always getting

colds and infections. In fact, I almost died as a baby from a problem with

my kidneys, and had become septic. Its a miracle I lived. But I had never

experienced anything like this... And to experience it when I was just

trying to see my idol? When it was only my second concert ever? It crushed

me tbh. My dad asked what was wrong and I finally said the words I had been

avoiding all night... "I wanna go home" (which was actually his

girlfriend's house who lived in Boston... I'm from Maine). And he said

"okay". That was all he needed and he left, walking back towards where we

left the car. However, around 7:30ish the traffic in this area is really

weird I cant even explain it. But traffic can only go one way, instead of

both ways like normal.. So he couldn't get a ride back to the car and had

to walk, and then drive the car in traffic all the way to the stadium to

pick me up. So i had to wait a while, and while I did I heard clapping and

then a British voice say "hello Boston" and he started playing give me

love. I listened to him play and i only cried more because I was so

frustrated I couldn't go out there to see him. About half way through the

set, my dad showed up. They let him park in a no parking zone to come and

get me so he was right next to the enterance to the field. They were going

to put me in a wheelchair, but instead my dad came and helped me up. He was

holding me up straight and almost dragged me out of the first aid station,

into the stadium. I remember this part so well. The air hit me, I heard

Ed's voice clearly and saw him on stage, and suddenly, I let go of my dad,

and I was able to stand on my own... And I was fine. It was like a miracle.

I yelled to my dad over the music "is it too late to stay?" And he screamed

back "what??? After all that you wanna stay???" And I said yes, so, we

stayed. He went to go move the car (the girl was so nice who did the

parking, he told her the story, and he just needs to park the car and het

back in the stadium, how much would it cost. And the girl said park

wherever you want no charge. I thought that was seriously the sweetest

thing.) Sooo he did that, and since I was only 12 in a huge stadium, one of

the cops that was patroling the place stayed with me and asked me all kinds

of questions about Ed Sheeran, especially about the A-Team, when he played

it. He said "this isn't his song right?? Is this a cover?? I know this

song." And I told him it wad and told him all about it. It was the ideal

conversation for 12 year old me 😂 Anyway, my dad came back, we got to our

seats, and I actually met Andrea for a very brief moment! And before I knew

it, Taylor was playing. And I had made it through the entire show. I woke

up the next morning, still feeling a little sick but actually felt better

after eating, so I thought the worst was over. But, I was wrong... I didn't

know that one night would become my life... And god I wish I had gone to

the hospital... Maybe I would be okay now if I had... But anyway... A month

later (in August), it happened at my friends end of summer party. Then a

month later (in September), while I was at school... Each time worse than

the time before. Everyone had been informed I was having issues, but nobody

had seen anything happen yet. I seemed like myself. Then one day, I was on

my way to lunch with my friends, and I collapsed in the hallway... Same

thing happening. All my friends freaked out and 2 stayed with me while the

rest went to get the nurse. She actually thought I was dying, and honestly

I could've. She called my mom and said she wasn't sure if she should call

my mom or an ambulance. Then my mom came and got me and immedaitly took me

to my doctor (because she said next time it happens to come in so they

could monitor me). I was monitored and fell asleep, then 4 hours later i

woke up like nothing happened. After that i was pulled out of school and

constantly at the doctor. And I just got sicker and sicker... Which was

later diagnosed as... "Anxiety". By an unqualified doctor. He was a thyroid

doctor and diagnosed me with that?? As time went on, I got incredibly sick

to the point I can't even move. I have become completely disabled and lose

control of my body a lot. It's like my brain is disconnected from my body.

And I get this weird feeling im falling off a cliff and I cant feel my arms

and when that happens, I cant move at all. I cant even express how bad it

can get, how scary and painful it is. I'm a lot sicker than most people

think I am... I spend most days in bed, actually unable to move. I find

ways to keep my spirits up, luckily. Mostly its listening to Taylor and

watching friends but yeah 😂 I have days where I can't even sit up I'm so

dizzy and weak and it hurts so much. Its also terrifying when you don't

have full control over your own body. Absoultely terrifying. Although I

have okay days where I can stand up and function for a little bit, most

days lately have been like this... Bad and living from my bed due to

weakness and dizziness (extreme dizziness honestly). I have days where its

even a struggle to breathe, the most simple thing in the world. It gets

depressing at times... When you spend all ur time in bed or a wheelchair it

really can vet discouraging... But I'm still fighting. And I'm so happy I

am. And like I said, Taylor always lifts me up. Even on my worst, most

disabled and bed ridden days. Oh, that reminds me... I also have seizures

now, sadly. But I hadn't had what happened that night at the RED tour in a

while though... Until one night last year... While I was seeing Ed Sheeran

in Gillette Stadium 😂 Maybe its him?? I dont know 😂 Anyway, I spend most

days in bed, and I do online schooling now. I've seen Taylor twice since

then. For 1989 and for reputation. With 1989 I needed a lot of help but I

got through it. Reputation, it had gotten so bad I needed a wheelchair and

I still do whenever I go out, really. I dont have full control over my body

and I'm too weak and just very sick. I'm really hoping to go to lover fest

but if i do will need a wheelchair and even then I'll probably still feel

sick... But Taylors worth it ❤ Hopefully can get ada seating like with rep.

Wanted to keep this last part short but I think I failed 😂 Mainly wanted

to focus on the red tour. My health story is so incredibly long, I couldn't

say it all (maybe I will later). However, for now, I will tell you this, I

was diagnosed with a thyroid disease, migraines, and seizures. Then it was

discovered that all of this... Was advanced Lyme Disease... And it created

something called Dysautonomia (basically a disfunction of the autonomic

nervous system, which most people don't even realize they have, or how

important it is, until it makes you sick and either nearly kills or

cripples you... Depending on the kind though.) Also known as POTS, or

Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (there are actually 15 kids of

dysautonomia, that being one of them, I might possibly have more than one

kinda, were not sure yet. But its basically half cardiology half

neurology). And there's no cure... I could be this way, this disabled and

sick for a while... But there are treatments that might work luckily!!!

Since there are no Dysautonomia clinics in Maine, I either have to go to

New York, Baltimore, Cleveland, or Minneapolis. So looks like im taking a

trip! Sadly to a hospital, but still 😊 I honestly don't know how we'll pay

for it, but I need it, or I will spend my life like this. So I'm sure we'll

find a way... Like I always seem to do in life, no matter what 😊❤ Oh, and

funny thing is, I have something called PANS as well... So I have Pots and

Pans 😂😂😂 Anyway, I just wanted to share this with you guys because like

I said you guys are always so great and Taylor is my favorite artist so I

wanted to share it with the people who understand my love for her. I've

been a huge fan of her for 13 years (I'm 18, 19 next month, now). Theres

something about her... She's always helped me but especially now. She makes

me so happy and feel so safe during this time... Im fact, the only time i

smile like i did when I was younger,before all of this, is when I listen to

Taylor. I even have a Long Live tattoo on my wrist because I felt it

represented my love for her the most, and what we've made as a fandom, the

magic we've created. Plus, it reminds me that I'm fighting my battle (this

"dragon") with Taylor and her music on my side, as well as all of you. And

it makes me smile. I can't wait to get more Taylor tattoos... Honestly,

after all of this and the other health issues I faced as a baby and a

child, I can't believe I'm still here, that I'm still living... Especially

because since I've always been so sick with so many different illnesses and

health issues to the point I'm disabled, my immune system is so weak. I

truly cannot believe I'm still here. But... I guess my body just isn't

ready to give up. It hasn't yet at least!!! And it doesn't want to. It

won't. I'm strong. Me, and my body, want to fight until the very end. And

I'm grateful for that. So grateful that I am still alive, and still

fighting every day of my life. It might be hard, and I can't function or do

really anything but lay in bed and watch tv most days, but I'm just so

thankful that I'm still alive, that it's okay I have to be at the doctors

so much and have to take all these meds (I do anything at this point that

can help me even the slighest). And no matter what life throws at my

health, my body always fights it and gets right back up. I fall down 10

times, I stand up 11. And I could not have the courage and strength to do

this if it wasn't for my idol, Taylor Swift. I've been a fan of Taylor for

13 years (I'm 18 now, 19 next month) so her and her music have helped me

through every problem I have ever faced, and this is no different. She has

a song for everything, so I can always find something to listen to that

makes me feel like she understands and she's telling me it'll be okay...

And ever since LOVER came out, I've been listening to soon you'll get

better on days its really bad, and my girlfriend sends me that song on bad

days too... It makes me feel safe. And like I can fight this. Thank you,

Taylor. I will never be able to repay you. I may struggle with this every

single day im here on earth, but with your music and the support I feel

from the swiftie fam, I know I'll get through it. Anyway... I guess I

should end this here. Again, sorry this is so long but if you read this

thank you so much for taking the time to!! If you made it to this point,

I'm proud 😂❤ And it means the world to me, you have no idea. Im hoping

this will get to Taylor and maybe even Ed one day. I love you all so much

and once again, thank you for reading!! ❤❤❤

@taylorswift @taylornation 🌈❤ @taylornotices 💜

(Pic is from when I was in First Aid at Ed Sheeran. It was so bad there

they had to give me an IV. I was in the first aid station, wrapped up in my

nightmare before Christmas blanket, on a stretcher with an IV in my hand

pretty much the entire night. It was so painful. When I arrived to first

aid I was actually unresponsive. Like I knew what was happening but I

couldn't talk or open my eyes. All I could do was make very small

movements. It felt like my body was shutting down. I was having bad heart issues as well and they wanted to give me a medicine fot my nausea but since I had lyme disease it could make my heart issues worse so they had to give me an EKG... Right there at the concert 😂 Interesting... But, I got through it.

Like always 😊 So yeah thats where the

picture is from ❤)