#I'll admit this chapter was supposed to be funny and light-hearted | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dingochef · 1 year ago

Text

Pairing: Jake "Hangman" Seresin x You (OFC)

Warnings: Swearing, Smut (MDNI 18+ Only), Stalking, P in V, oral (female and male receiving), Semi-public sex, light spanking,

Word Count: 2.8k

Summary: Maverick's back for a debrief about Darkstar and still projecting out his misplaced Dad vibe.

Series Masterlist

My Masterlist

Chapter 2

Heart

Jake and you are brushing your teeth when you remember what's on your schedule for tomorrow. You tell Jake,

"Hey, Maverick is coming in for a debrief at work tomorrow. Anything you want to pass along to him?"

Jake laughs as much as he can with his mouth full of toothbrush and toothpaste foam. It reminds you how you thought his smile was from a 1950s toothpaste commercial when you first met him. He spits out the toothpaste and rinses his mouth, as he wipes his face with the hand towel as he says, drolly,

"Oh goody, Maverick having another opportunity to express his opinion that I am totally unworthy of you."

"Well, he's not the one who gets to decide, I do and I have definitely deemed you worthy of your love and other feminine wiles," you respond as you squeeze in between him and the counter and wrap your arms around his bare torso.

He laughs and says,

"And what delightful wiles they are," as he embraces you.

"What did Maverick say to you when he gave you the whole 'treat her right' speech? you ask.

He chuckles darkly,

"It was an extensive list Let's see, one, he doesn't consider me a decent human being," you roll your eyes and snort slightly at that one, he starts to count on his fingers, "Two, he's only convinced I have a heart because the Navy medically verified it, three, that I remind him of himself at his age and he doesn't consider that a good thing, all of which I don't agree with. I do agree with his advice that you are a once in a lifetime kind of woman, and as he so eloquently phrased it, 'Don't fuck it up'".

"I kind have to admit the one about the heart thing is a teensy bit funny" you say holding up your fingers pinched together. He looks down at me in a mock glare.

"Little does he know just how big your heart and your capacity to love is," you pat his cheek lightly, "Don't worry I'll set him straight."

"Thanks, I know you have a bit of a reputation to live down, but it's really none of his business," Jake says with a little pout.

You go on your tiptoes to kiss his adorable pout and can just barely reach his lips. You are still standing hugging each other next to the bathroom countertop, you sandwiched between him and the granite. He grabs your waist and lifts you up to the counter where you will be a perfect height to reach his lips. You squeal a little from the shock of the cold granite to where your skin isn't covered by your underwear. He looks at you moderately confused until you say,

"The granite is cold on my butt." He laughs a little and leans in to kiss you.

"I might be able to help you warm up," Jake says, wagging his eyebrows. Instead of saying something he reaches for the back of your head and pulls it to his for a searing kiss. His free hand moves along the smooth skin of your back under the t-shirt you're wearing. He is pouring all of himself into this kiss. Your mouths part slightly and his tongue slips past your teeth and yours follows into his mouth. He has let go of your head now and is sliding his hand down along your side to the bottom of your t-shirt.

He breaks the kiss and says,

"As much as I like seeing you in my clothes, I definitely prefer you out of them."

His Naval Academy Class of 2010 shirt is dropped unceremoniously on the floor of the bathroom.

You laugh and respond,

"I thought you were supposed to be making me warmer, not colder."

"Give me a second,"

he huffs in reply and leans down to take your nipple in his mouth, using the barest amount of teeth to graze it. He earns a deep moan from you, as he moves to the other nipple you look down and he is smiling looking pleased with himself. The other nipple gets the same treatment.

Jake then kneels down and kisses his way from your knees up your inner thigh. He kisses you through your underwear, in an undignified manner you roll your hips forward trying to get more contact.

"Lift up your hips," he commands. you push against the counter to lift yourself and he is pulling your underwear off and adding it to the pile of clothing on the floor.

Jake's tongue is around your clit before you can register what his next move is. He pushes a finger into you and proceeds at a leisurely pace. You lean back against the mirror, all coherent thoughts gone from your brain as you run your hands through Jake's hair.

You reach down and pull at his shoulder for him to stand, and practically breathe out,

"I need you inside me."

Jake wastes no time in pulling down his boxers. He gives his cock a few strokes and lines it up to slowly enter you. He starts thrusting at a fast pace and grabs your hand to circle your clit while he uses one hand on your back to support you and plants one on the counter for stability.

You lean over as far as you can in your position and whisper,

"I'm yours, Jake and I'll always be yours."

He ducks his head into your neck and keeps thrusting away. Any other words of encouragement are wiped from your brain as your only focus is to get off as you frantically rub your clit.

The visual of Jake thrusting into you and your own rapid pace on your clit send your orgasm hurtling towards you. You finally snap and come hard around Jake. Jake stutters in his rhythm but thrusts a few more times before finishing inside you.

You are both breathing hard as you release each other. You hop down from the counter with slightly shaky legs. Jake looks around lost for a minute before you offer him some tissues to clean up.

You pick up your discarded clothes and put them back on and say to Jake.

"Come to bed, you've definitely kept me up past my bedtime."

He fixes his boxers and follows you to the bedroom where we fall asleep quickly.

–

You're at your desk the next morning reviewing the agenda for Maverick's debrief before he gets in at 10 am. You see all the areas we want to cover flight characteristics, maneuverability, pilot comfort, control design, and a lot of other things that only a pilot can give feedback on, the best sensors in the world can't tell you what it's like to actually fly the plane.

You head down to the lobby to meet Maverick and get him signed in and badged up. The security at your office is understandably strict. You swipe him and yourself into the elevator and as you're going up to the floor you work on, he finally says something,

"I'm not sure your coworkers are going to like what I have to say about some of the parts of Darkstar."

He gives you that Maverick smile, the one he knows he's going to cause some trouble.

"We don't have to like the feedback to find it useful," you remind him.

"I want your honest opinion, if my coworkers can't handle constructive criticism that's on them. Plus it gives my boss something to put in the 'Needs Improvement' category on their annual performance evaluation."

He smiles and nods as the elevator opens. You have to walk past your cube to get to the conference room, and you casually point it out to Maverick.

"Here's where all the magic happens,"

you say with a little hand flourish. He takes a step in and looks around at your collection of photos, desk items, and other trappings of corporate life. He scans the photos and he seems to stop on the selfie Jake and you took at a concert last week. It's one of the few photos you've printed out of you two.

Maverick takes a step back and says,

"Let's get to it."

The debrief goes as planned, more of how Maverick planned rather. He has less than stellar comments about the user interface inside the aircraft.

"It's not intuitive, buttons aren't in sequential order of operations, and they're all the same color. Which you agree looks cool, but it is hard to find what you need in a hurry."

More comments on maneuverability, "I get this is a speed machine, not a fighter but it still feels like I'm driving a tugboat. The response is delayed."

Pilot comfort gets his best review,

"I felt like the plane was tailor made for me, it is literally the most comfortable aircraft I've ever flown."

The meeting winds down at about 1 pm. Since you signed Maverick in you have to escort him out, as you exit the conference room he asks, "You want to grab some lunch?"

Your stomach growls on cue,

"I do, how does sushi sound?"

"Excellent, lead the way."

You walk over to the lunch spot, a cozy sushi bar that is cleared out of the lunch rush by the time you arrive.

You get seated and order pretty quickly. As you wait for the food, you ask him what his current assignment is and how it's going.

"I am being tasked with reviewing the basic flight school training curriculum. Something about inspiring the next generation of pilots."

You smirk,

"I bet you have a few things to say."

He laughs,

"I'm on page 12 of the manual and already have three pages of suggestions."

Your food comes out promptly and you dig in. You decide to lob out a question,

"Can you ask you a personal question?"

"Sure, shoot."

"So, what's the thing between you and Penny all about?"

He laughs,

"Yeah, that is a personal one. Penny and you have been involved a few times over the years against our better judgment. I'd get shipped off somewhere and we'd break up. I'd show up again and we start up again. Now that I'm permanently out of San Diego you feel like we can actually make this time work."

"That makes sense, I've just noticed Penny has a little more pep in her step lately when I've been down at the Hard Deck."

He smiles and then says,

"My turn."

"Go for it," you reply, curious what he is going to ask.

"You and Hangman, still involved?

"Yes," you answer, feeling a little defensive .

He shakes his head,

"I just don't see it. He strikes me as the bed hopper type. I remember being that age, being a hot shot pilot and using that advantage with women. He reminds me too much of myself to be a good thing."

"You know 'Hangman™'. The pilot, the ego, the bravado. Not Jake, the guy. The Jake you know, see, and love is a very good man, kind and caring, funny, and good for me. I think people have different parts of life and different faces they show the world. Not to say they don't overlap at all," you reply leaning over the table a little, emphasizing your point.

"It's just hard to see you two together," Maverick offers.

"I know that on paper Jake doesn't seem like someone I would end up with, but I've been with the type of guy everyone expected and it turned out terrible. Maverick, I appreciate your concern, but this is the real deal. Jake told me about your 'treat her right' talk when we first started seeing each other."

He cringes,

"I apologize for that, it was overstepping, but I just wanted him to not fuck it up and hurt you. Probably me trying vicariously to fix my past mistakes."

"You want to know how you met him?" you ask.

"Yeah, I was wondering how you two knew each other that night you ran into you at the Hard Deck," he replies, taking a swig of his drink.

You recap that memorable meeting and Maverick is nearly falling out of his chair as he laughs. (You leave out a few of the more sordid details.)

"He tried to explain to you, Ms. Aerospace Engineer, PhD how planes fly?" he cackles.

"Yup, and then I let him have it. Rooster was pretty happy at the performance. I walked out of there never expecting to see him again. But, he reached out to apologize and it worked."

"Okay, I give him credit for having the courage to try again.

"He's a really great guy and he makes me happy, end of story."

"I can tell, you said you love him without thinking about it, just make sure you invite me to the wedding," Maverick says, a slight grin on his face.

It's your turn to laugh,

"When we get there, we will."

You say goodbye to Maverick at the

restaurant and walk back to your office. The rest of the afternoon flies by and pretty soon you are walking in your front door. Jake's shoes are near the door but you don't see him in the living room or the kitchen. You head to the bedroom to change out of your work clothes and finally you find him on the patio on your porch swing. His head is hanging down and he has a glass with an amber liquid in it propped on his knee.

"Jake, are you okay?"

you ask as you sit down next to him on the swing. The smell of bourbon wafts up from the glass. He looks up and wraps an arm around you as he sighs,

"I'm fine, it was just a shitty day at work."

"What happened?"

"We almost lost a student today, they almost died. It was stupid shit, easy things they should have known, really basic stuff. And it wasn't the first time. I've talked with this guy before and it just wasn't sticking. I had to make the recommendation that they be withdrawn from the program. Which is not going to look good on their record and might ground them. I just can't shake the feeling that I'm shitting on someone's dreams. I keep thinking of how I would have reacted if it was me."

"Jake, some people aren't cut out for the work. I can imagine it feels demoralizing to ground someone,but you have to consider the bigger picture. If they can't handle training, how are they going to be in a real situation? How would you feel if they killed someone else?" you ask, gently.

"I understand it on an intellectual level, but I still can't get over that feeling of ruining someone's life. I've never had this much control over someone's life, except my own," he says, letting out a long breath.

You lace one of your hands with Jake's free hand and say,

"You'll get used to it, the fact you're so affected by this shows it isn't some decision you made on a whim. You really tried to make them a better pilot. And here Maverick thought you didn't have a heart."

Jake narrows his eyes upon hearing Maverick's name,

"Speaking of the old man, how did your debrief go?"

"For work as expected, he was rather frank with his assessments. We ended up going to lunch, just the two of us."

Jake raises an eyebrow.

You laugh,

"Purely professional, although lunch ended on a weird note. He questioned why I was with you. I think he saw that photo of us at the concert last week I put in my cube."

Jake tilts his head,

"See Maverick's still sticking his nose where it doesn't belong. What did you say?"

"Said that Maverick really only knows one version of you. He doesn't know this version," your free hand cups Jake's cheek as you speak,

"The very loving and caring version. I assured him that this relationship is the real deal and he relented and asked to be invited to the wedding."

Jake's signature smirk forms on his face as he leans into to kiss you,

"So you're saying there'll be a wedding?"

"Yes, you know that," you give him a fake slap on the chest, "We're definitely walking down that path."

He puts down his drink and pulls you into his lap,

"Well, if that's the case we should definitely start practicing for the honeymoon. We'll probably have to go somewhere where I can have you nude all the time."

Chapter 4

@starswholistenanddreamsanswered

@mayhemmanaged

@callmemana

@dempy

@hangmanscoming

@lanie-k

@callsign-viper

@senjoritanana

@djs8891

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@memoriesat30

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@midnightmagpiemama

#top gun maverick #hangman #hangman fanfiction #jake seresin fanfiction #top gun fanfiction #top gun smut #hangman x you #jake hangman seresin x reader #jake hangman seresin x you #jake seresin x you

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therottenkingsreckoning · 7 months ago

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Here it is, the chapter for which the whole story was named! Really had fun writing this, I'm having fun with all of them.

Don't be surprised if future installments take the teensiest bit longer to get done- I'd had a rough draft for these four going in, but everything past it will be brand new. Will still try to get things done as soon as I can- I'm excited to share what I've made, just as you're probably excited to read it!

~Little Flame, Chapter 4~

It took several more minutes to convince Eddie that his mate really wasn't sick, and a few more days trapped in the house to convince other folks that they were. But when Julie called them up excitedly asking if Frank felt ok enough to come by for lunch, how could he resist? She was their best friend after all!

So, off they went, and soon Frank found himself at Sally's theater, happily listening to the two girlfriends chatter away.

"It must be natural lighting this time," the star declared. "Candlelight if we may. Harsher stage lamps just won't do for the mood!"

"Forgive my saying it, but I'm not sure I trust you around open flame," Frank half-joked.

At this, Sally spun around, dramatic finger in his direction before turning it on herself. "Francisco, darling, I am open flame! If my set hasn't burned down by now, then surely a few measly lights won't pose a much greater risk."

"You've let us help you light menorah candles too," Julie chimed in. "Why would that be allowed and this isn't?"

Frank rolled their eyes and let out an exasperated sigh. "That's different. I'm there to watch you then, and make sure you don't hurt yourselves."

"So you can help us now!" Sally said assertively, stamping her foot down close to them. So close, in fact, that he could feel the intense heat her presence naturally gave off, and they had to admit she was right before. If her natural starborn radiance hadn't caught things on fire by now, nothing would.

"Will you help us Frank? Please?" Julie pleaded.

Frank looked from the star to the monster and back, finally letting out a groan as he flopped backwards onto the wood of the stage. "Fine!" They grumbled, far too exhausted these days to even try arguing. "I suppose I can help you."

The next hour was spent getting candles together from each of their houses and those of their neighbors, along with the various cups, jars, and vases that fit the collection. In the end, they had 34 small burning lights, set up to test their effect in the darkest back corner of Sally's backstage.

"I will say, this looks good," Frank said, bending to light the last candle. "You're right Sally, the warm tones feel...cozy."

"Of course!" the star beamed. "You should know you can always rely on my genius in matters of art!"

Julie walked up to her, giggling, and placed a small kiss on her cheek. "It's what I like about you. You're smart, funny, really pretty-"

"Alright stop!" Frank shouted playfully, "before she gets any more of a big head about it."

"You're jealous."

"Am not."

As he watched the two wandering off to make props, both were practically gleaming (one literally so.) It made Frank smile. After all they'd been through, here they were, happy lives so full of love for each other. Julie and Sally, Wally & Howdy, Barbie with her lovely boyfriend & Poppy with both of her girls.

He & Eddie, and the beautiful child they'd soon welcome home. Looking at the flickering, soft candlelight, their hand gently rested over his belly, heart full of contented joy. "I'll have my own little flame to take care of soon," he thought to themselves.

A gasp. He turned to see them both staring at him wide-eyed in shock, and Frank's blood ran cold.

He hadn't thought it. They had said it.

And now she had heard.

Moments passed in a razor-edged silence between them, mere seconds that felt like eons, and then Frank cleared his dry, raspy throat. "I-I didn't..."

Julie was the first to speak, a few gentle steps towards them & words spoken softly even though he could tell she was vibrating with contained emotion. "Frank? You're...you're pregnant?"

Their hands flew up now, one in his hair and the other making desperate attempts to wave off her comment. "D-don't be ridiculous Julie, I can't-"

"Hey," Sally spoke up now, equally awkward as she fumbled for the right words to not upset him. "I-It's alright dear, I...already knew about that. Or...I'd had my suspicions at least."

Frank stared into her eyes, anxieties scanning them for any possible sign of judgement. But there was none, only quiet and warm reassurance, solid ground on which to stand. "You didn't say anything?" To which she merely shrugged. "It's not my place to say. You'd tell us when you were ready to."

A barely compressed squeal shot out of Julie now, finally breaking the thick atmosphere. "Oh, but is it true? Is it really real that you're having a baby my guy???"

Frank could hug her right now. And they did, holding tight through the dizzying drop in his blood pressure. He was laughing, nerves and relief tangled up together in their head. "Yes, yes. It's...a few weeks along now, I think."

The rest of the afternoon was spent in excited chatter as before, his friends offering all the congratulations, questions and advice they could muster and to which Frank felt comfy responding. As they said their goodbyes, sunset bathing the trio in the same lovely glow as before, a soft rumble of laughter rang out from the door.

"Guessin' they know about it too now, huh?" Eddie asked, stepping out to embrace his partner.

"Yes," Frank replied with a chuckle of his own. "Sort of slipped out when we were testing the candlelight for Sally's play."

"Candles?" Eddie raised an eyebrow at that. "Don't know if I trust her around open flame."

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slightlymore · 3 years ago

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¦ a doyoung collaboration ¦

¦ starting July 2021 ¦

OPEN TO READ AVAILABLE FICS BELOW!

MAD: let's pretend we're in love | @127-mile

genre: angst, unrequited love, best friends to strangers, fake dating

warnings: strong language

"doyoung is beautiful.

he is also kind, attentive, affectionate, smart and funny. he is charismatic and well-spoken. his voice could be mistaken with that of an angel, whether he is speaking or singing. doyoung is everyone’s dream, the one person you would not hesitate to introduce to your parents.

doyoung is also… mean.

doyoung has the face and the voice of an angel, in the body of a demon. doyoung tells his mother he is dating you after lying about his relationship. doyoung knows about your feelings,

but he doesn’t care."

BOY: 14 roses for you | @urlocalnctstan

N/A

ASHAMED: I want nothing on me but you | @slightlymore 50k

"how easy it is for another to kill you.

no force, no hands on the throat - just their mere presence suffocating you.

it was weird but you craved it.

as if you had a morbid attachment to death by his hand."

ADMIT: consider, if you will, our hearts on this road | @kyukyuhunnie

"If I can figure out how to write a paper about the Philippines in a class focused on the Holy Roman Empire, then I can figure out a way to teach you a semester's worth of knowledge in three weeks."

Doyoung looked at you, scepticism painted across his face, but nonetheless he slowly nodded. "If you think it's possible, then I'll trust you."

You smile in victory, a feeling of competitiveness suddenly arising in you. You pull the syllabus back towards you and look at the schedule of topics. Without looking at him, you say, "Pull out your textbook and turn to the fifth chapter." After a moment of not hearing movement, you look up at Doyoung whose ears were slowly turning a brighter red.

"I, uh, don't," he starts, fingers anxiously twirling the pen in his hands.

"Have the textbook," you finish, trying not to let out a sigh. "Go to Jaehyun at the desk; he can help you find it." Doyoung nods and heads away.

This was going to be much harder than you thought.

SLEEPLESS: cry for me | @babiesdreams 5.6k

genre: royal au, angst

warnings: death of a character, blood and mentions of violence, mental health issues

"what shall define a kingdom's faith?

if war brings hunger and death, illness and misery. and peace is meant for the weak ones... what is the real goal of a king?

is it power? trust? love? benevolence?

or is it all just an infinity war for a land of nobody, while people still die from hunger?

if a man cannot be trusted to make a simple task of protecting a kingdom, I shall do it instead"

MELTS: alone I cannot be | @sunflowerforhaechan

"he is your heart's desire, the light at the end of the tunnel, the missing puzzle piece.

so you give him a second chance.

because you're mad for the boy. and you love him—mind, body and soul."

genre: fluff, slight angst

FOOLISH: call me a fool | @soliverse 1.5k

warnings: one cuss word

"once doyoung calls, you’re ready to drop everything to be there for him.

pity that he only sees such efforts as a friendly gesture."

HEART: heartbreaker | @fullpoetrycowgirl

“you crossed paths with the one who ruined your only love”

ODD: bluest | @honeyedgloss 11k

"going to jaehyun's vacation home along with his other friends was supposed to be a formality. you wouldn't even have to make friends with any of them: in three weeks, you'd be back home and would never see them again.

what wasn't planned, was doyoung's appearance.

MISERY: F.U.C.K. | @moonctzeny

for the first time in your life, you manage to develop a friendship with someone you've just met - and for some reason, he seems to take pleasure in crushing your certainties: about yourself, the life you want to live, and your long-lasting love for jaehyun."

"if there was one person you’d imagine taking as a plus one to your cousin’s wedding, it definitely wouldn’t be doyoung - your definition of a sour know-it-all in flesh and bones. blame it on your friends that are never there when you need them, or your annoying curiosity for his cold demeanor, but there he is, downing expensive champagne with you.

one glass and you can still stand him.

two glasses and he’s not so bad after all.

three glasses and he’s in your bed.

does the boy drive you mad or are you mad about the boy?"

JOY: love you more | @notnctu

"doyoung has always been short with his words, oftentimes intimidating with his sharp chic stares and emptiness in his tone.

but his tough exterior melts away every time you smile at him and he wonders if you know the extent of how much he loves you."

previous: PRESENTATION POST

#collab: matb #mad about the boy #doyoung #nct

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tinyboxxtink · 3 years ago

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"Not My Yacht" *Chapter 2*

Yes, for two days this is a semi short chapter, but I had another long today and have one more tomorrow and I wanted you to have SOMETHING. Weirdly though I had an entire different chapter written in my head, but when I started typing this came out instead. My original idea is still coming, this just added a fun little bonus getting there. I promise, tomorrow you will get a longer chapter.

Thank you loves for sticking by me through everything! I love you all.

Also, I'm finally using CHAPTER. I kept wanting to use it instead of PART but I just kept writing PART and was like WELP. But they're chapters, right?!

Ok I'll shut up.

Part 1 Here

Part 3

Tag List

@madamsnape921

@lolliepopsicle

@chasingeverybreakingwave

@milkshqke

@wanniiieeee

@word-scribbless

@gibbs274

@sassyada

@aprildecker-blog

@bookishfanfic

@stars-in-the-skies-world

@stars-trash-18

@omgsuperstarg

@objection-argumentative

And @storiesofsvu for Rita check. lol.

----------------------------------------

When five o’clock rolled around, Rita came walking out of her office with a stack of papers and her briefcase, balancing her purse on her barely free arm.

“Y/N, Why are you still here? Did I not unlock your chains?” She laughed.

“Haha….no, ma’am” You nervously laughed. “I um, I think I’m waiting for someone,”

“You think?” She raised a curious eyebrow. “If you’re waiting on Barba, you’re going to waiting a long time, sweetie,”

“Wha-? How--? Why, exactly?” You asked her totally flabbergasted by the insinuation that not only had Rafael asked you out, but was bailing already.

“He tends to get a little...involved, in his cases. Poor man is a workaholic,” She feigned pity for him.

“Right,” You nodded to her comically overflowing briefcase and papers. “Something you know nothing about,”

“Touché,” She winked. “I’d give him a call, make sure he hasn’t forgotten about you, dear. Before the cleaning staff shows up,” She laughed and sauntered out of her office, leaving you alone in the dark.

You glanced down at your phone. He hadn’t really specified a time, just-- “Tonight”. What did that even mean? Tonight. Like early evening dinner, or a midnight snack after he was done with his cases? You should probably text him. Or call him. Or text him.

TO BARBA: Heyyy….

Wait. Was three y’s too many? Wasn’t that a rule? You show affection by how many y’s you use? Is that a thing kids do these days? Wait, no you’re not a kid. And he certainly was NOT a kid. No. Be a grown up about this.

TO BARBA: Hi I’m just...checking in.

Checking in? What did that even mean? And why the ellipsis? There doesn’t need to be a pause in a text. That’s why it’s a text. You pause in your mind before typing. Idiot.

TO BARBA: What’s up?

Ok. Short and simple. To the point. No pressure, no demanding. Just... ‘checking in’. You hated yourself. Alright fine, good enough send it. SEND IT. HIT SEND NOW.

MESSAGE SENT.

Your phone shook in your trembling hand as you waited for the ellipsis of him writing back. That was too much, no no just put it back in your pocket and he’ll text you when he--

BARBA CALLING

Oh god, a phone call? Who calls people anymore? Grown ups, that’s who. Answer the phone like an adult.

“H-Hello?” You answered it as if he had the wrong number.

“Hey, Cinderella,” His smooth voice came through your earpiece. “I’m so sorry, I should have been more specific about the time,”

“Oh, yeah no-- no big deal, I’m just here at work….alone, in the dark…” You muttered the last words to yourself as you looked around the dark office.

“Right. Well, I’m kind of wrapped up in this case right now--” He started, making your heart drop. Well, Rita called it. He’s just married to his job, no time for women, let alone you. Time to just--

“....Would you hate me if I asked you to come help me?”

“...I’m sorry, what?” You blinked in confusion at your phone. So, was he actually asking you out or trying to snake you as an assistant from Rita? Is that what he meant by ‘dinner’? “Hey come bring me food and help me file these cases, because I’m so sexy and cocky and--”

“You know what, I’m so sorry I just heard how that sounded. You’ve been doing this all day, the last thing you wanna do is come--”

“Sure!” You cut him off a little loudly. What were you doing?! You’re just going to lay down and let him use your services for free? Well, when you put it that way it sounded pretty skeezy about yourself.

“....Are you sure? Because we can just have dinner another night--”

“....Yeah I have a feeling that will never happen,” You cut him off with a laugh.

“Wha--no, it will! I just--”

“Your wife comes first, I get it,” You cut him off again.

“My wife?”

“Yeah you’re married to your work,” You smirked into the phone.

“Wow, quippy Cinderella. Guess you’re more confident on the phone without my gorgeous face tripping you up now, aren’t you?”

“Do you want my help or not, Casanova?” He was totally right; without those green emeralds staring into your soul you were actually a pretty funny and smart person. Maybe it would be better to just have this date on the phone.

"Yes, absolutely," He sighed with a smile.

“Did you want me to bring food, or am I just supposed to eat paperclips and vending machine leftovers??”

“I’ll order some pizza, do you like pizza?”

“....I live in New York Barba. Obviously I like pizza,” You teased.

“Right,” He chuckled. “Well I’ll be here--”

“I know where your office is,” You cut him off for the third time.

“Oh, do you?” He asked in a sneaky tone, as if he thought you’d been googling him or something.

“Um, yeah,” Your voice fell an octave softer. “Actually I’ve been there several times, dropping off stuff from Rita for you,” Of course he wouldn’t remember that. Why would he remember that? You weren’t anything special.

“Shit,” He muttered as if chastising himself. “Y/N I’m so sorry, I--”

“It’s fine,” You assured him as you headed down to the subway. “I’m uh, I’m getting on the train so I’ll see you soon,” You hung before he could reply.

--------------

It wasn’t that far to Rafael’s office from Rita’s, just a few stops away. You quickly hurried up the stairs back into the Manhattan air as you swiftly walked through the sea of people leaving corporate America to go home to Suburbia. Finally you reached the building, went for the door and-- it was locked.

Well of course it was locked, nobody else in their right mind would be here this late-- so clearly you and Rafael were out of your minds. Shit. Should you call him? Was there a buzzer? Before you could think of another solution a pizza delivery man was walking up to you. Maybe ‘man’ was too generous, he was probably around 16 or 17.

“Delivery for Mr. Barba,” He handed you the pizza. Did you look like a “Mr. Barba” to him?!

“I um,” You stammered as the hot pizza burned the sides of your arms you were holding it on. “I’m not Mr. Barba,”

“Are you taking it to him?” He asked you with a slight attitude.

“I um,” You thought a moment. Well you were going to see him, so yes theoretically you would be taking the pizza with you to him. “...Yes,”

“That’ll be 46.57.” He whipped out a credit card scanner on his phone.

“E-Excuse me?” You were taken aback. Now Barba had you buying him dinner? And what kind of pizza costs basically 50 bucks?!

“2 Large pizzas, an order of cheesy bread, a dessert pizza and delivery fee,” The kid read off the receipt from his phone. “I only accept credit or debit cards, and please tip generously,”

“Yeah right,” You muttered with a roll of your eyes as you pulled out your credit card and swiped it across his phone. The light turned green and a receipt printed off an attachment to his phone. He ripped it off and handed it to you, then nonchalantly walked back down the stairs to wherever he was parked.

“Awesome,” You sighed. You still didn’t know how to get inside, and now you were carrying all this hot food. All of this for a pair of green eyes?!

To make matters worse, your phone started going off in your purse. You groaned and tried to put all of the boxes down softly, but the night wind blew them onto the pavement, HARD.

“Shit!” You groaned louder as you tried to salvage the food while pulling your phone from your purse. Of COURSE.

BARBA CALLING

“I can’t get in,” You simply stated as a greeting on the phone.

“What?”

“I can’t get in the building, Barba,” You grumbled, now on a 8 on the annoyance scale.

“Oh! Oh God,” The line went dead. Awesome.

After a few minutes while you were trying to rebalance all of the boxes in your arms, one of the big glass doors swung open right into you. The boxes all pressed against you, their hot, saucy, cheesy and chocolatey goodness smearing all over your work outfit.

“SHIT!!!!!!” You screamed in horror.

“Oh my god, Oh god Y/N I am SO--” Rafael started to apologize profusely, but you noticed he was trying his best not to burst out laughing.

“I’m sorry, do you think this is funny?!” You asked angrily while you peeled a pepperoni from your hair.

“No, not at all,” He shook his head vigorously, but kept giggling behind his eyes.

“You do!” You stomped your heel, causing marinara to roll down your legs. “You are absolutely laughing at me being covered in all of your stupid food that I had to pay for by the way--”

“Oh no, really?” He suddenly turned sincere.

“No, Rafael,” You scoffed as you tried pulling cheese from your skirt. “I just had sex with him in the parking lot and we called it square,”

“Really--?!”

“NO NOT REALLY!”

“Okay! Okay I’m sorry, really I am,” Rafael tried to show you sympathy, but you looked so damn cute covered in a tasty meal.

“Yeah I can see that, you’re grinning like a five year old,” You rolled your eyes.

“I’m sorry, Y/N I really am,” He gave up trying to hide a laugh. “But you have to admit it’s pretty funny--”

“I DON’T THINK--” You started to scream at him again, but his smile made these cute little crinkles in his eyes, and his laugh was like an angel’s chorus. You might have been covered in food, but you would be covered in manure if it made him laugh like that.

“For what it’s worth, you look delicious,” He teased you, pulling an actual full piece of pizza from your chest and biting it.

“Oh my god, you’re so gross,” You did your best not to laugh, you were still supposed to be angry.

“Yum, Y/N flavor, my favorite,” He laughed for a moment just as you both realized what he had said. “Uh, I mean--” He looked away in embarrassment, and you swear you saw his face flush red.

“Um no counselor,” You bit your lip with a smile. “I’m pretty sure I taste better than a mix of pizza sauce and chocolate,”

“I’m sure you do,” Rafael bravely retorted, now that he knew you were in the playing mood.

“....But seriously, now I have to go home and get this shit off--”

“I have a shower in my office,” He blurted out.

“....Excuse me?” You blinked, not believing you heard him right.

“I...I have a shower in my office,”

“Oh my god, Rafael Barba are you that addicted to work that you live here?”

“No!” He rolled his eyes. “It’s for emergencies,”

“Emergencies? Like what?”

“Like a beautiful woman covered in pizza toppings and chocolate,” He smirked. “Now come on, I don’t want anyone around here thinking I’m dating a crazy person,” He opened the glass doors again and escorted you into the lobby of the building.

Your mind didn’t know what to focus on first; the fact that he had this mysterious office shower, that he had offered for you to use said shower, or the fact that he just referred to you as a ‘woman he was dating’. You just followed him silently into his office with a smitten grin on your face.

He wasn’t lying when he was in the ‘middle’ of something. Papers were strewn all about his desk, a white board with bullet points for arguments and cross examinations scribbled on it. You finally got a good look at him without the anger of having food all over your judgement. He looked tired, not the usual smooth and pristine Rafael Barba you were used to. But when he looked back at you to show you where his shower was, his green eyes sparkled gazing into yours.

“So, I have some spare suits in a closet here, would you mind hanging out in one of my dress shirts while I wash...these?” He gestured to your dirty clothes. Wait, wash?

You suddenly realized he had led you into a secret room to the side of his office, behind a bookcase.

“Wha…” You looked around the room. There was a shower, a wardrobe, a washer/dryer combo, and a suit steamer. “Jesus Barba, are you sure you don’t live here?”

“No I promise I don’t,” He shook his head with a laugh. “...But I may have on occasion fallen asleep here enough to invest in this,”

“And what happens when this office is passed on to a new ADA?” You raised an eyebrow.

“Then I’m sealing this place off like a mausoleum,” He stated very seriously, causing you to giggle. He loved your giggle, it was so small and soft, just like you.

“Anyway,” He shook off his momentary daze at your giggle hoping you didn’t notice. “Like I said-- Shower, dress shirt. Just put your dirty clothes in the washer and we’ll pop them in the dryer later,”

“Right,” You nodded, definitely having noticed his dreamy stare at your giggle. How had you gone from completely under his radar to making him giddy like a school boy in two days?

“Right,” He nodded back. “I’ll just be out here...ordering another pizza,” He smirked. “By the way, I’ll totally reimburse you for the one you’re wearing,” He stuck his tongue out at you with a huge grin.

“Oh you better,” You gave him the same face back. “Or I’ll cover you in it,” You lightly pressed a marinara sauce covered finger into his perfectly white dress shirt. He glanced down at it in horror.

“Oh that was so--” He started to tickle and attack you, but realized that would only make his outfit dirtier. “This isn’t over,” He wagged a finger at you as he pointed you to the shower. You gave him one last cheeky smile as he walked out and shut the door to his secret room.

What was happening? Why were you getting to him so easily, so fast? How could he have not even remembered that he had ‘met’ you several times? Well, one thing was for sure. He was never going to forget this night.

#rafael barba #rafael barba imagine #rafael barba fanfiction #rafael barba x you #rafael barba x reader #law and order svu #law and order svu fanfiction #not my yacht

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miss-smutty · 3 years ago

Text

The Destructive Secret

Chapter 3

A/N- The secrets out! Well to you guys anyway 🤫

Summary- You've got a secret to hide and it's going to cause complete and utter destruction. It's only so long until your lies are going to catch up to you.

Word count- 3,258

Warnings- Swearing, lies, deceit, cheating

Pairing- Chris Hemsworth X you / Liam Hemsworth X you

18+ only!

Disclaimer: This is an entire work of fiction/AU and has no affiliation to real life what so ever! This is a fictional story about fictional characters who happen to share names and faces with some real people.

Posted: 25th May 2021

Taglist-: @innerpaperexpertcloud @pandaxnienke @chickensarentcheap @mostly-marvel-musings

Chapter 1 + 2

"Morning babe, I tried to let you have a sleep in. I didn't wake you did I?" He asks, preoccupied with the washing up.

"No, I actually had a good sleep for once." You say nonchalantly while searching through the kitchen cupboards for a mug in a half asleep haze. "That's not going to last long when I have to spend the weekend in a hotel bed though."

Finally finding your favourite mug right at the back of the cupboard, you slam it on the counter a little more aggressively than you expected, startling you out of your daziness. Your boyfriend raises his eyebrow at you questioningly and you just shrug your shoulders back at him. It was definitely going to be one of them days, those days where nothing goes right. You would question what you'd done to deserve it but you already know the answer to that. You were just going to have to put up with karma kicking your ass at any given moment for the rest of your life.

"Aww I know babe, at least it's only two night's though." He comes up behind you, resting his chin on your shoulder and wrapping his arms around your waist. "You've just reminded me -" He presses carefully, the way he shifts his composure telling you he's uncomfortable with what he's about to say and your heart begins to beat a little faster. " - I know you're going away tomorrow and I really wanted to have the night alone..." He pauses again.

"Just tell me, what is it?" You ask, trying to keep the annoyance from your voice.

"My brother called this morning, he sounds in a bad way so I said he can come over and hang out tonight. You don't mind do you?" Now your heart stops beating completely, what the hell is he playing at?

"I'm worried about him, he's not been right lately and he's going away for work tomorrow night too so it's the only time I can see him really." You're angry with him for saying he's going away too, how more fucking obvious can he make it? You're just both suspiciously going to be away with work at the same time. You can't protest about it now, you don't want to raise any more questions.

"No of course not, babe." You agree reluctantly, still seething with anger on the inside. "Right, I'm going for a shower and then I better start packing." You sulk.

"Do you want some help?" He ask as you kiss him on his cheek while you're passing.

"It's ok babe, you know how meticulous I am with my packing." You say smiling softly at him.

"Gotcha, I am not getting involved with that. Give me a shout if you want a coffee."

"You're the best."

****************

Using the tap to muffle the sound of your voice while you make a call. This was starting to become a habit now, the sound of running water in the background whenever you speak to him, a memory that you will never forget. Whenever you run your bath or fill the sink you're going to be reminded of your lying and cheating. Great! Just another thing to add to the list of things to look forward to in the future.

You never thought you'd be a cheater, especially to someone you loved and cared for so deeply. You'd always despised people who cheated, could never understand how people could have multiple lives and cheat multiple times. Naively thinking that if they weren't happy they should just tell the person they are with and stop all the hurt but it doesn't always work that way. You didn't suddenly think 'hey I'm not happy, I'm going to go fuck someone else'. You certainly wouldn't have chosen his brother if that was the case. Over the years it just happened and you hated yourself for it. You weren't even unhappy in your relationship, so that throws all your theories of 'cheaters' completely out of the window. The sound of the dial tone snaps you from your thoughts.

"Hi babe." He answers almost immediately, leaving you with no time to regain your composure. "Hello?"

"Oh erm.... Don't 'hi babe' me." Not a great start, you have to admit.

"What's wrong?" You can tell that Chris is amused with your tone of voice and it makes that anger resurface.

"You know exactly what's wrong, why the fuck are you coming over here tonight?"

"Erm to s-" you don't even give him time to speak before you interrupt him. You don't believe that he's just coming to see Liam, you know he's coming to see you no matter what he says.

"As if it's not awkward enough without having you both in the same house together... You have to cancel." The thought of them both being together with you filled you with fear. How were you supposed to act around them both? The idea of it fills you with chills.

"I'm not cancelling. I haven't seen him in a while and he invited me. It'll be fine, I'll be on my best behaviour, I promise. I get you all to myself tomorrow anyway."

"Exactly so why do you need to come over here and make everything all awkward?"

"Babe I'm coming to see my brother, you get me to yourself tomorrow. Don't be selfish" you could hear the amusement in his voice, you're sure he enjoys this.

"Pfft." A huff is about the only thing you could manage right now.

"You get to have both your favourite people in the same room, at the same time... Hey maybe we can have a threesome?"

"Fuck off." You murmur, although you have to admit the thought of it does turn you on slightly. In a perfect world that would be the best possible outcome but it's not a perfect world and that most definitely would never happen.

"I'll see you tonight, wear something sexy." He laughs.

"This isn't funny." You reply before hanging up the phone and you're left alone with the tormenting sound of flowing water.

This is going to be a disaster, you can't help but think that tonight is the night it all comes out. Surely this isn't what he has planned, he wouldn't want to hurt his brother in such a viscous way. To announce at dinner that he's fucking his girlfriend and that they've been going behind his back and fucking for years. Surely not? You're pretty sure you're being paranoid but know you're going to be on the edge of your seat all night, frightened everytime he opens his mouth to speak.

**************

You're sure you've downed almost a full bottle of wine before he's even arrived, you try to remember how many glasses you've had when you finally hear the dreaded chime of the doorbell. Your head is dizzy with bubbles already, your stomach churning at the thought. It wasn't the cleverest of ideas to drink so much already, not when you need to be sharp and aware of what you're doing and saying. Fuck.

The way Chris' eyes light up when he sees you reminds you exactly why this is all worth it. You feel your nerves settle slightly now the first step was over and it wasn't so bad was it? You don't know what you were actually expecting, him to walk through the door and kiss you passionately sounds about right though.

"Chris! Hi, how you doing?" You act, standing on your tiptoes to hug him. It's so hard acting like he's your brother in law and not your... Boyfriend? Lover? You don't even know what to call him.

"Hi, beautiful." He whispers into your ear, making your stomach flip when you feel his lips graze against your neck. "I'm good thank you, how are you guys?" He says louder, moving away from your arms reluctantly and standing against the counter. The glint in his eyes and the smirk on his lips make him look sexy as hell, you bite onto your lip as hard as you can. Hoping to draw blood so you can concentrate on the pain and not the fact you want to rip your boyfriend's brothers clothes off.

"We're great" Liam replies.

"I'm sure you are." Chris says sarcastically under his breath, luckily Liam didn't hear him. You give Chris the glare, reminding him to be on his best behaviour.

"But how are you? You didn't sound too good the other day." Liam asks, opening a bottle of wine.

"I was probably just tired bro, you know how it is. I don't get much sleep nowadays."

"Oh yeah, is a woman involved by any chance?" Liam asks, laughing to himself.

"Yeah, something like that." Chris subtly grazes your hand as you walk into the kitchen to help Liam. You freeze on the spot, looking into his eyes you see a desperately pleading look. You know this is torture for him, that he just wants to grab you and hold onto you. Even though he tries his best not to, he hates his brother for it, he hates that he gets to have you.

"Anyway, it smells great in here. What you making?" Chris says locked in eye contact with you.

"I've just thrown together some dinner." You say casually, although deep down your heart is tugging and your hands are shaking.

"Her food is fucking amazing, I probably should have made sure you hadn't eaten first though?" Liam puts his arms around you and kisses your cheek as you carry on stirring the food on the stove. You're glad you have your back to Chris because you dread to think of his reaction. How you have to pretend you don't know each other on that deep level. You had tried to warn him that this was a bad idea.

"Yeah, no that would be awesome. Thanks" You can tell by the way his voice broke that this is causing him pain and there's nothing you can do about it.

**************

"Do you want a beer or are you ok with wine?" Liam asks Chris as you sit down at the table ready to eat.

"I'd love a beer bro" Chris replies. You watch from the corner of your eye as Liam heads to the fridge, your heart beating a little faster now he's out of sight. Looking to Chris nervously.

Chris takes the opportunity while Liams back is turned and grabs your hand under the table. Stroking your palm with his thumb he mouths the words 'love you'. You can't help but feel sorry for him, this horrible situation you're all in. You mouth the words back to him before he lets your hand go when Liam comes back into sight.

All the way through the meal Chris can't take his eyes off of you, you're worried Liam will notice but he's paying no attention. Obviously he has no reason to doubt his loyal girlfriend and protective big brother, why would he? Which makes your betrayal even more unbearable.

"This is great Y/N." Chris says after tasting your food and moving your dress a little higher so he can place his hand on the top of your bare thigh under the table. The shock makes you jump and you hit your knee on the top of the table.

"Are you alright?" Liam asks looking slightly confused.

"Sorry, yeah. I just burnt my mouth." There's a slight hint of amusement in your words, you're a bad person but the situation is just too much not to find it slightly funny. The feel of Chris' hand on your thigh makes you feel butterflies in your stomach at the same time as the deep sick feeling of dread, your mind in a giant conflicted turmoil of feelings.

You can see Chris is also trying to hide his laugh as he takes a sip from his beer, one hand still on your thigh. Why the fuck am I sat in the middle? You hadn't thought about it when you'd sat down but now realise it was a massive mistake and also subconsciously the perfect place for you. The playing piece in a match against brothers, only one player is unaware there is any contest at all.

Chris finishes his beer and puts it down on the table loudly, filling the awkward silence between you all. You can understand the awkwardness between you and Chris but why is Liam not speaking? He wanted to see Chris to figure out what was wrong with him but he's not asking any questions. Has he figured it out? Did he see Chris touch your hand earlier? Had he seen you both whispering? You wriggle in your chair, feeling deadly uncomfortable and hoping Chris would move his hand. He didn't take the hint.

"Do you want another?" Liam asks Chris, already getting up from his chair and not waiting for an answer. Something is definitely wrong. Chris's hand moves further up your thigh, grazing the lace of your panties with the tip of his long finger. He's also completely oblivious to your awkwardness, drinking too much is numbing his senses and becoming dangerous. He's playing with fire.

You fling your chair back from the table, standing abruptly, your cheeks flushed red with embarrassment and nervousness.

"I'm just gunna get some more beers from the basement." Liam announces, Chris sat cooly in his chair with not an ounce of nervousness.

"It's ok I'll go, you guys have a chat." You say, desperately needing to escape for a minute to catch your breath.

"Don't be silly, it'll only take me a minute." Liam says, already walking towards the door.

Chris takes his cue again, standing from his chair and moving over to you. Standing closely so he can whisper in your ear, his arm pressed to the small of your back while he holds you against him.

"I can't wait to have you in my bed again tomorrow Y/N. I've waited too long."

"Chris, shh."

"No, you shh. I wish I had you now, right here. I could just sit you up on this counter and fuck you right here -" He moves his hand up your skirt, gripping your ass in his big hands. "- You want that don't you? Tell me." His teeth graze the skin on your neck, making your head hang back loosely. You want it so bad, all your tension melts away as your muscles relax in his arms.

"We've got all weekend Chris, we can't do this here. It's too risky." You sigh, carefully wrapping your arms around his neck and listening for any sign of Liam.

"Fuck I know but it's so hard being here with you and not being able to fucking touch you." He moves away from you, running his hand though his hair in frustration.

"I told you how hard it'd be." You say.

"How hard what would be?" Liam asks breathlessly. Fuck. You hadn't heard him coming back, how much more had he heard?

You're lost for words, completely frozen in shock. If he hadn't heard or seen anything it was still way too close for your liking.

"To shoot this ball of foil into that bin from all the way over here." Chris replies hastily, you're incredibly impressed with his quick thinking.

"Let me have a go then." Liam says, taking the foil from Chris. Typical competive brothers. Chris turns to you and winks devilishly, you're perfectly aware of how desirable he looks but you try to push that thought aside. You can't be thinking about that, the things he had just been saying and the thrill of almost being caught, all at once.

"My turn." You say raising your eyebrows at them both as you swing your hips, confidently over to the fridge. Chris bites his lip as he watches you walk over. "Watch and learn boys." This is quite possibly the strangest situation you've ever been in but you might as well make the most of it.

You shoot your shot and land the foil ball straight into the bin. Turning around and bowing, you're wide eyed when you straighten back up. They both moved towards you as if they were going to kiss you, luckily Chris stopped himself in time.

"Only you could've landed that shot." Liam says, picking you up in his arms, leaving you with no choice but to wrap your legs around him while he kisses your lips deeply.

You risk a glance at Chris over Liam's shoulder and he's seething with anger, you can see it written all over his face.

"I'm gunna go outside for some air." Chris announces blankly while Liam sets you back on the ground, a look of concern on his face.

"You alright bro?" Liam asks with no reply from Chris as he walks out of the door.

You get on with the cleaning up, distracting yourself and hoping Liam hadn't noticed Chris' reaction. You can sense Liam behind you, stood on the spot thinking. He's working it out, he's putting together all the pieces and finally working it out.

"I've worked out what's wrong with Chris." He comes up behind you, emptying the plates into the trash. Fuck, here we go.

"What do you mean?" You ask gently, not really wanting to hear his conclusion.

"You know, the reason why he's been moping about all the time." You don't turn around, you just listen, hiding your face and any reaction you're showing. "Well he's quite obviously jealous of us." He adds. There we go, he's worked it out or he's definitely worked out Chris' part in it all.

You felt your stomach drop, Chris was so obvious it wouldn't take a genius to see something was wrong.

"What makes you say that?" You press, carefully. Your back still turned to Liam while you clean the surfaces.

"Don't tell me you didn't notice how he just acted when I kissed you." Of course you noticed, you just hoped Liam hadn't. It won't be long until he puts all the pieces together and figures this all out, if he hasn't already. You pour the last of the bottle of wine into your glass, gulping it greedily. Lord knows you're going to need it.

"He needs a girlfriend, can't you fix him up with one of your friends?" You can't describe the relief you feel right now and a small twang of jealousy at the thought of Chris with one of your friends.

"I'm sure your brother isn't short of admirers Liam, he doesn't need me to fix him up" Your tone of voice was a little too short. Pull it together.

"I suppose you're right but he doesn't have the best taste in women does he?" You can feel your cheeks burning, you're fighting the urge to defend yourself. Telling Liam his brother had the same taste in women when it came to you, wouldn't go down quite so well would it?

"I'm seeing someone actually Liam." Chris says, overhearing your conversation as he came back in after finally composing himself.

"Oh really? You never said." Liam asks curiously.

"Yeah, we're keeping it to ourselves for now... Until she tells her boyfriend." What the actual fuck? You can't believe he's just said that, he looks at you defiantly, completely over this whole thing.

Liam nearly spat his drink out and you're sure your cheeks are beetroot red, you don't have a clue what to do in this situation.

"Is she married? Do I know her?" Liam questions further. You're hoping and praying he stops with the questions, Chris is ready and willing to come clean, you can tell by his expression.

"No not married but you do know her. You know her really well actually." Chris says while avoiding your gaze purposefully...

#chris hemsworth #chris hemsworth fanfic #chris hemsworth smut #chris hemsworth x reader #chris hemsworth x you #smut #angst #liam hemsworth #read this #thor #thor series #thor smut #fanfic #chris fanfiction #fanfiction

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george-fabian-weasley · 4 years ago

Text

Fred Weasley — Helplessly Part 3

Summary: After the Battle of Hogwarts, Fred was rushed to he muggle hospital for better treatment of his injuries. While in a coma, his soul stayed with you for a couple of months. He watches as you went through the stages. And he watches when you start to write a song, just for him.

Words: 2, 681 words

Warnings ⚠ : I don’t think this fic will have anything BUT sadness and constant pain and heartbreaks sdhsjd im sORRY

Disclaimer: This one... hurts a lot

TAGLIST FOR HELPLESSLY: HERE

PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4 | PART 5 (COMING SOON!)

---------------------------------------------------

CHAPTER 3: I'll Follow You

He woke up alone.

Fred Weasley woke up with no idea where he was. ‘This… This isn’t Hogwarts?’ he thought. The fluorescent light above him was a bit bright, yet he didn’t feel like he needed to adjust his eyes. Fred blinked, wasn’t he in the middle of a war? The last thing he remembered was saying words to Percy before-

Before the walls.

He tried to move, and was surprised that he can, with complete ease. ‘Wow, and here I thought getting crashed by walls would hurt a lot.’ He thought, scoffing a smile. How the bloody hell did he feel no pain? Absolute brilliant! He sat up from the bed, looking around, looked like a hospital ward.

Strange, he’s in a hospital but he didn’t feel any pain. Was he visiting someone? That’s not likely, innit?

And then Fred heard the constant beeping. He looked to his right, there’s a peculiar machine showing a line going up and down. Then his eyes darted to a wire connected to it, and then followed his eyes until the very end.

A hand.

Fred tilted his head, slightly confused. He blinked a few times. He just woke up in a hospital… And he saw a beeping muggle tech machine… and now there’s a hand…. Whose hand is it?

He looked to the hand, that hand looked awfully familiar, looking like George’s. But George’s hand is less calloused than this one. So naturally, Fred sees the owner of the hand when he turned around.

It’s… It’s him.

Fred felt the blood draining from his face, his heart felt like it did a somersault and a fucking split to the ground. He instantly jumped out of the bed in shock, his eyes were the size of two golf balls. Even with bandages, he knew that was him.

It… It could be George, though. But that thought was quickly thrown out the window. He’s lived with the man all his life; he knew they were both very different physically. Fred was, rightfully to be frank, terrified.

Why was he there? In bandages? If that’s him, then what the hell is he doing standing here?! Fred walked closer to ‘himself’, thinking to himself that this might be some prank George pulled on him, Polyjuice potion and all. Upon thinking that, Fred relaxed; actually convinced his brother was pranking him.

“Ha, ha. Funny.” Fred muttered; a relieved smile painted upon his lips. For one second there, he really thought he had gone crazy. He looked around, “Oh, Georgie? Where are you, you little git?” He sang playfully, chuckling to himself. This prank was a great one though, he had to admit.

Fred’s eyes darted back to the man on the bed. He smirked to himself, wondering who did George had successfully coaxed to drink that nasty Polyjuice to turn into him. His mind instantly thought of you, and his smirk widened.

“Oh, goodness. Why is there another me here? I wonder?” Fred faked a shocked voice while simultaneously walking closer to the man, whom he had convinced himself was you under the Polyjuice potion. When ‘you’ didn’t react, he chuckled a little bit more, “I know it’s you, darling. C’mon now, trying to prank Fred Weasley? The prankster himself? Really, love?”

He reached his hand to touch ‘yours’, only to realize his hand literally went through it. Fred frowned, he reached again. His hand went through the other hand, again. At first, Fred thought this was some sort of magic going on, a hologram at some sort, but the one who looked like a hologram was him.

“Bloody hell-“ Fred inched away fast; his feet stepped back a few steps in newfound fear. He looked around hastily, “This isn’t funny anymore, George. Knock it off!” He shouted across the room, yet nothing happened. He looked back to ‘you’, “Y/N, you can wake up now. This isn’t funny.” When ‘you’ didn’t react, Fred gulped. “Y/N!” He called again.

“Fred!!!”

Fred snapped his head upwards, his heart dropped at the sound of your wail. “Y/N…?” He whispered in horror, eyes darting back to the man on the bed, “Who the bloody hell are you…?”

Fred heard your scream again, and quickly without any thinking ran out of the ward, looking left and right at the unfamiliar surroundings. Suddenly, he saw Bill. He was with Fleur, looking distraught and anxious to the group of nurses at the counter, who instantly got to their feet, some calling the doctors while some followed Bill and Fleur.

He instantly followed them, “Bill!” He kept calling his older brother, but Bill didn’t seem to notice. Fred was far back, yet he kept calling for him. “William Arthur Weasley, you deaf git!” He muttered under his breath, gritting his teeth. He grew more anxious when he heard your screams getting louder, “Fred!!!! Let go of me!!!”

“Y/N?! Y/N!!!” He shouted back, he had lost Bill among the people, yet he kept following until he reached a ward. “Freddie!!!!” You were screaming, with tears non-stop scrolling down your cheeks, a strand of saliva was visible at your mouth, showing how many times you had called for him.

A group of doctors had pinned you down, and quickly injected you with something, making Fred furrowed his eyes in anger, “What the bloody hell do you think you’re doing?!” He shouted. He looked at the surroundings of the room, everyone was there.

Why was Molly crying hugging Hermione? And why was George just standing there?

“George! What are they doing to Y/N? Why aren’t you doing anything?!” He shouted, yet George seemed to ignore him. His heart tore apart every time you screamed his name, you were looking very distraught, and scared, and anxious.

He literally ran to be beside you, kneeling to the ground, “Y/N, love, I’m here.”

Yet you kept crying, until it slowed down, “Please, I need to see Freddie… He almost died in my arms, please…” was your last whimper before you passed out. Fred frowned, “Y/N, darling, I’m here! I’m not dead, I’m here-“

His hands that were to cup your face went through you.

Feeling fear right about now is the understatement of the century. Fred had never felt so horrified, in his life. Not even when he was fighting the Death Eaters a while ago, not even when the walls shattered him. This… This is terrifying.

He turned his head to the group of people who were now lifting unconscious you back to bed. He stood up slowly, gulping as he took in your state. You had heavy eye-bags, your skin was pale, and you looked exhausted. Yet you never failed to make his heart flutter at the very sight of you.

As if adding oil to the fire, Harry who was beside him just stood up and bloody walked through him. Not walk past him, through him. As if he’s just a ghost.

Fred froze. Is that what he is now? A ghost? Like Peeves and Moaning Myrtle? He quickly looked down at his body, checking himself. No, he isn’t glowy blue, nor is he see-through. Fred was confused and terrified, and that two feelings together were never a good mix.

“I told you it’s a bad idea to tell Y/N so soon, George.” Fred turned to Ron who was looking to George who looked distressed. “Now’s not the right time for you to pick up a fight with me, Ron,” George growled; his eyes were dark. Fred realized George’s state was similar to yours. In fact, everyone looked exhausted. His heart broke at the sight of the quietly crying Molly who was still in Hermione’s arms.

“You could’ve told it later.” Ron, ignoring his brother’s warning earlier, continued with silent rage. “Ronald,” Hermione warned, glaring at him. “Then what am I supposed to do, you bastard? Is it your twin who’s in a bloody coma and your best friend hyperventilating, losing their mind? Am I supposed to carry this burden alone, huh you git? You’re fucking 18, Ron, use your bloody brain for once.” George snapped and walked out of the ward, seemingly wanted to cool off.

Hang on. What did he just say?

Fred gripped the bed railings to balance himself, his head suddenly went dizzy. “Coma? Me?” He whispered, not believing his ears. So the man earlier, that was really him? Not you under the Polyjuice potion? So, him standing in your ward right now, what was he? A ghost? A million thoughts swarmed Fred, he felt his chest tightened and he almost couldn’t breathe.

“Why did you have to do that, Ron?” Hermione sighed out, Molly had just calmed down and excused herself to the bathroom. Ron didn’t answer her, and just walked out after looking solemnly in your direction.

Harry sighed, “I’ll go get him.” He said, glancing at sleeping you, and left the ward. Slowly, the ward became empty, and the only ones there were Fred and you. His grip on the bed become tighter at the sight of you.

“F… Freddie…” Suddenly you mumbled out, and a tear rolled down to your sides. Fred was beyond devastated, heartbroken even. You looked so miserable, and Fred wanted nothing more than to hug you, caress your hair, and just whisper sweet nothings to you.

“I’m… I’m here, love.” His voice quivering, his hands trembled severely. He wanted to kiss your forehead, but the fear of his lips not touching your skin scared him more than ever. He wanted to wipe your tears away, so bad. Without warning, his own tears scrolled down his cheeks. But the tears never drop to the floor, they just vanished into thin air the moment they left his face.

Fred felt a painful tug in his heart, he was beyond devastated. You were right there, and he could see you, but you couldn’t see him.

No one could.

The thought of being invisible made Fred’s crying worsened. He started to scream within his cries, begging anyone to just listen to him or actually notice he’s there. Fred wailed, screamed, shouted, with tears running profusely, the saliva in his mouth kept coming out as a result of his excessive breakdown.

He was screaming his heart out, yet no one was listening.

Fred had to crouch down beside your bed as his knees turned weak, his head facing the ground, silently begging to see if one of his many tears would plop to the ground, and actually wet them. But the moment they jumped from the edge of his face; his tears vanished.

Fred calmed down a few minutes later, he was growing exhausted from the mental breakdown he just had. He stood up trembling, his mind still distraught and disheveled, and his eyes softly darted to you.

He weakly smiled, “At least I got to see you, love.”

A week passed and Fred had accepted the fact that he was indeed in a coma, and his soul was out of his body, resulting in him to be like… this.

But it wasn’t easy for him.

He had to watch Molly and George take turns to look after him and Y/N, and they seemingly took turns crying for both of you. Fred was sobbing in the corner of his ward when Molly was crying while wiping his body, the view of his mother crying over him was absolutely heart-breaking. Molly was the first woman in his life, and he dreaded the fact that he couldn’t hug her, nor even touch her.

He also discovered that his body would also cry whenever he’s crying, resulting in Molly crying even harder as she realized her unconscious son was also crying silently. His heartbeat would also match his body’s heartbeat. When he was having a breakdown at Y/N’s ward a while ago, his heartbeat was very fast, causing the beeping machine to enhance its pace.

So Fred had jumped to the conclusion that somehow, he and his body are still connected. And with that being said, he’s not a ghost. Only a lost soul.

Fred would always visit your ward. He couldn’t sleep, but he would close his eyes at night so that his heartbeat won’t increase rapidly, in order not to worry his family. He would smile whenever you smile, just silently watching you communicating with Hermione. But as soon as he realized that you had nightmares at night, he couldn’t sleep after that.

So he would sit at the empty chair beside your bed whenever it’s empty, and just watch you sleep. When it’s time that you woke up crying, Fred was grateful that Hermione was there to calm you down, he couldn’t even describe the pain in his heart when he sees you so distraught.

And it broke his heart, even more, when he found out the nightmare involved him.

You were… suffering because of him, and Fred had never felt guiltier. He had also discovered that he could touch objects, he just couldn’t touch humans, which explained why he woke up laying on a bed, instead of sinking. He didn’t do anything to you though, he was afraid it would worsen your condition.

That night came along. For the nth time, Fred felt his heart breaking at the sight of you sobbing on Hermione’s arm, once again attacked by the same reoccurring nightmare. When you begged Hermione to go see him, he had expected Hermione to say no, that’s what she’s been saying for the past week.

It’s a pleasant surprise when Hermione agreed.

You didn’t know, but Fred walked beside you and Hermione, watching your every step so you wouldn’t trip. He knew how weak your legs were, he was there when the doctors explained your condition to Molly. If it wasn’t for him being invisible, it would look like Fred was worrying for you at every step you took. He quietly smiled to himself, knowing it would annoy the hell out of you whenever he does that.

“Hello, Freddie.” Your quiet voice made a slight tug on his heart. You were holding his hand, and it was killing Fred that he couldn’t feel your touch. Or your warmth. He had to control his tears when you begin to sob on his body, his cold hand became the resting place for your forehead as you leaned forward.

He had never wanted to touch you so badly, and it’s torturing him to control his tears because he knew the body would cry as well, and he didn’t want to sadden you any further. No words could describe the pain in his heart, and how fast his heartbeat is becoming. You didn’t notice, seemingly had filtered out the beeping sound from your mind to focus on your lover.

“I missed you, darling. I’ve missed you so much…” He heard you whisper while caressing his face. Fred was right in front of you, the only thing between you two was his static body on the bed.

Fred forced out a chuckle, faking the laugh so his tears won’t come out instead, “You have no idea how much I missed you as well, my love. No idea…” When you left, after kissing his knuckles, that’s when Fred broke down. He had never cried loudly before, courtesy of sharing a house with several people for years, but when he does, it was refreshing.

But he had never felt so alone.

So he understood your feeling when he saw you leaning against your bedroom door, crying in the dark at your apartment once you’ve been discharged. He decided to follow you home because he couldn’t bear staying at that cold, lonely hospital any longer.

His home was you; you were his home and you still are.

And his heart bleeds; because he knew he was your home as well. And while he’s right there in front of you, sitting across you with tears in his eyes, begging you to see him so you won’t cry out of agony again, you didn’t know.

You would never know.

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PART 4: READ

TAGLIST:

@paigeyisme @britishspidey @hargreevesgrace @jasminweasley @neutralgoodval @kaidenceweasley @igotabadfeelingabouteverything @123happyllama @nicole-prz @phuvioqhile @ionlycamehereforfanfics @martalol @mccloudchloe @hufflepuffzutara @weasleysangel

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layce2015 · 4 years ago

Text

The Last of Us Part 2 (Joel x Reader)

(A/n: just wanna say that I'm not gonna follow the game completely. A good amount of it I will follow but there is a fate of a certain character that I'm gonna change as I feel Naughty Dog did this character dirty.)

Chapter 1: I Don't Know What Happened

The Last of Us (Joel x Reader) Masterlist

"I don't know what happened." Joel admits to Tommy as he starts to clean the neck of the guitar. The two brothers were out on patrol and decided to stop and take a break in this abandoned house. There Tommy had to ask Joel what happened with the Fireflies as Joel and (y/n) seemed a bit tight lipped about what happened.

"(Y/n) and I were suppose to take her to the Fireflies and walk away." Joel said before he let's out a small scoff. "You go halfway across the country with someone. She needed her immunity to mean something. Maybe we were starting to buy into that whole...cure business. Maybe (y/n) and I just wanted to do right by her. And then we made it." Joel explains as Tommy sits across from him, listen intently.

"We found the Fireflies. And because of her...they were actually going to make a cure. The only catch...it would kill her." Joel said, whispering the last sentence.

Flashback

"Sweet Jesus." Joel mutters and (y/n)'s jaw drops as the couple made it to the operating room.

"Doctor?" A nurse said and the doctor turns to them and gasped. "What're you two doing here? I won't let you two take her. This is our future. Think of all the lives we'll save." The doctor said as he grabs a scalpel and aims it at them. Joel glares at the doctor with determination while (y/n) closed her mouth and started to reach for her gun.

Present Day

"Jesus, Joel." Tommy mutters, shocked, as he stares at his older brother. "What did you two do?" He asked. Joel looks up at Tommy for a moment and replies. "We saved her."

Flashback

After killing the doctor, Joel disconnects the tubes and goes to pick Ellie up. "Stay back!" (Y/n) yelled at the nurse as Joel whispers to Ellie. "Come on, baby girl. I gotcha..."

As he picks her up, the couple look out the window to see some lights shining through. "Oh shit." Joel said as he starts to run at the door. "Get back!" (Y/n) ordered at the guards that were coming in, aiming her gun at them before turning around and follow Joel out of the room.

Present Day

"Damn, Joel. That's um...that's a lot." Tommy said, sounding like this was a hard pull to swallow. Tomny looks down them back up towards Joel. "What does Ellie know?" He asked as Joel continued to clean the guitar. "I told her they ran some tests. I told her...her immunity meant nothing." Joel replied.

"And she believed you?" Tommy asked, curiously. "She didn't say otherwise." Joel said, softly, as he looks down. "And (y/n) was okay with this?" Tommy asked. Joel stops cleaning the guitar, looks at the floor for a bit before he raises his head up and nods at his brother.

Flashback

"Joel?" (Y/n) asked her husband as they drive down the highway in the truck, Ellie still passed out in the backseat. Joel turns his head slightly to look at her, her face full of concern and worry. "Are we really gonna go through with this? Lying to her?" She asked.

"We have to. For her sake." Joel replied. (Y/n) let's out a sigh then looks down at her hands. She looks over her shoulder at Ellie and starts to think over what just happened. "You're not having second thoughts, are you?" Joel asked her, concerned.

(Y/n) continues to look at Ellie, as if she held all the answers, and she started to think about what if they let Ellie die, and it turned out that the vaccine didn't work? Then Ellie would've died for nothing. But then what if it did? Would the world go back to normal?

(Y/n) let's out another sigh before she turns to Joel and shakes her head at him. "No. I just don't like lying to her." She whispers before she turns back around and starts to twiddle her thumbs together.

Present Day

Tommy let's out a heavy sigh and shakes his head before he looks back at Joel. "We should head back." Tommy said and he gets up and grabs his backpack. Joel watches him start to leave then stands up, grabs his bag and the guitar and follows him out.

The two brothers go out to the garage, open the door then head to the horses and climb on. Then the two head out and start to head back home.

They make their way over the grassy hill to see the town of Jackson in the distance. As they make their way down the hill, Tommy starts to speak. "Did (y/n) go for her checkup?" Tommy asked Joel as they continued down the hill.

"She's suppose to go today...guess I'll find out how she is when I get there." Joel replied as the worry for the wellbeing of his wife started to linger in his mind. The past week, she had been sick and throwing up it seemed like every morning. She thought it was some type of flu but it didn't feel like the flu.

Luckily, there was a doctor in Jackson and (y/n) decided to go see him. Joel hoped that the doctor would figure it out and give (y/n) some sort've medicine. He hated to see her so miserable.

"We're almost there." Tommy said to Joel as they make it to the front gate of Jackson. As they got closer, the doors opened and they trotted inside and head over to the stable. Joel gets off of his horse, grabs the reigns and starts to lead the horse to the stable.

"It's okay. I got them, you go on." Tommy said to Joel. "You sure?" Joel asked and Tommy nods. "Alright." Joel mutters then he grabs his bag off of the saddle. "About what we were talking about earlier...." Tommy started to say and Joel stops and turns to him.

"I can't say I'd have done different. I'll take it to the grave if I have to." Tommy said to Joel, who nodded at him. "I'll see you later, Tommy." Joel said and he starts to walk down the street while Tommy leads the horses to the stable.

Meanwhile, Ellie was sitting her little room, which was basically a shed behind Joel and (y/n)'s house, drawing in her journal. She was listening to her walkman, which she fixed, and started bobbing her head to the music as she continued to draw.

Unbeknownst to her, there was a knock at the door but, thanks to her headphones, she didn't hear the knock. The door opens and Joel sticks his head inside. "Hello? Ellie?" He calls out but he noticed that she had her headphones on.

So he walks over to her then nudges the chair with his foot, which startles Ellie as she jumps and takes off her headphones. She turns her head and sees Joel standing behind her. "Jesus, you almost gave me a heart attack." She said, breathless, as she closes her journal and stands up to face him.

"I tried knocking, but..." Joel stops as he gestures towards the door. Ellie leans against her desk and looks up at Joel. "Hey." She said. "Hey." He said back. "What's up, Joel?" She asked him. "Just checking in." Joel replied. "Folks are..." he let's out a sigh then he starts to pace back and forth in her room.

"...y'know talking about how impressed they are with you and how well you're helping out." He finished. "Good." Ellie said. "Yeah." He mutters.

"Umm...is (y/n) okay? I heard she wasn't feeling good." Ellie said, concerned. "She hadn't made it back from the doctor yet....but I guess I'll find out here real soon." He said and Ellie nods.

"Tommy and I went out riding the other day and he, uh...he told me a joke and I thought about you. It's ummm....." Joel said but then he stopped as he tries to remember the joke. "Well, shoot, I forgot it. Something about a clock...how do you--" he started to say but Ellie interrupts him.

"Joel, it's, uh, it's pretty late, and I gotta get up in a few hours--" she said. "Yeah, yeah, I know, I know, and I'm gonna get out of your hair. I just um--" he said then he points towards the door then looks back at her. "I wanna show you somethin'. Just gimme one second." He said as he goes to the door, opens it and picks up the guitar then comes back in her room.

"What's this?" Ellie asked him, nodding towards the instrument. "Some folks call this here a gee-tar." Joel replied, really pouring into his Texas accent. "Funny." Ellie chuckles, softly. "You wanna hear something?" Joel asked her. "Okay." She said and he nods as he goes to sit down, the guitar on his lap.

"Promise me that you won't laugh." He said to her. "I won't laugh. I won't." She assures him as she sits down in her chair. "I'm trusting you." Joel said, smirking, then he takes a deep breath and starts to play.

If I ever were to lose you

I'd surely lose myself

Everything I have found here

I've not found by myself

Try and sometimes you'll succeed

To make this man of me

All of my stolen missing parts

I've no need for anymore

I believe

And I believe 'cause I can see

Our future days

Days of you and me

As he sings the song, Ellie smiles, softly, at him while (y/n) started walking towards the door then leaned against the frame. She got back from the doctors and spent most of the evening walking around Jackson, trying to clear her head as she was shocked at what the doctor had said to her.

It took her awhile to convince herself that she had to tell Joel and she was heading back to their home when she heard music playing. She followed it and realized that it was coming from Ellie's little shed house and walked up just in time to hear her husband sing.

She smiled fondly at this as she remembered the day he first sang to her. It was actually about a year after they started dating and he brought out his guitar and started to play and sing for her. In that moment, (y/n) realized that she had, indeed, falling in love with Joel. When he was done singing, she said the words "I love you" first and he, of course, he said "I love you" back.

(Y/n) was brought back to the present when she heard him stop playing and he looks over at Ellie. "There you go." He said. "Well...that didn't suck." Ellie replied, smiling, and Joel chuckles while (y/n) smiles. "I'll take what I can get." Joel said.

"Well, in my opinion, you still got it." (Y/n) said and both Ellie and Joel look over at her, both of them startled as they didn't hear her come in. "Hey." Joel said as he starts to stand up, still holding the guitar in his hand, and walking up to her.

"Hey, (y/n). You doing okay?" Ellie asked and (y/n) let's out a heavy sigh. "Yeah, yeah. I'm fine but, um..." she said then she looks over at Joel. "I-I need to talk to you, privately." She said to him.

The two share a look before Joel nods then goes back over to Ellie and holds out the guitar to her. "She's yours." He said to her, who looks at this in shock. "No. No, no, no, I don't know the first thing about this." Ellie said, quickly. "I promised that I'd teach you how to play." He said as Ellie takes the guitar.

She looks up at him, surprised that he remembered that. She smiles then looks down at the instrument. "You did." She said, softly. "So what you say? Tomorrow night, first lesson?" He asked her. "Deal." She replied, smiling. "Okay." Joel said and (y/n) smiles at this.

Joel walks over to (y/n), who takes his hand in hers, and they start to walk out until Ellie speaks up. "Did--" she stops as the two adults turns to her. "Did you remember the joke?" Ellie asked him and Joel leans against the door and thinks for a moment before he remembered how the joke went.

"What is the downside to eating a clock?" He recites and Ellie thinks for a moment but shrugs as she couldn't think of an answer. "It's time-consuming." Joel said and Ellie chuckles and (y/n) snickers under breath. "That's so dumb." Ellie laughs. "Yeah." Joel and (y/n) said then Joel grabs the knob of the door.

"Goodnight, kiddo." He said and he shuts the door and the two adults head back to their house.

Later, Joel opens the front door of their home and (y/n) walks in first before she stops in the middle of the hallway. "Everything alright?" Joel asked her after he shuts the door and walks up to her, her back facing him and her arms folded across her chest.

(Y/n)'s heart was beating rapidly, whether in fear or excitement she wasn't for sure. She just wasn't sure how Joel would take this news. "Hey." Joel said, softly, as he comes up to her and places his hands on her shoulders.

She turns her head to look at him then placed her right hand on one of his hands. "Whatever it is you need to tell me, we'll get through it." He said and she smiled at this, then she removes her hand off of his and turns to face him.

"I, uh...I really don't know how to say it, so I'm gonna come out and say it." (Y/n) said and Joel gives her a worried look as she takes a few deep breathes before she starts to speak. "Joel...I'm pregnant."

Joel's eyes widen and he let's out a gasp at this. "What? Y-You serious?" He asked her, shocked. "Yeah. He thinks I'm at least alittle over a month along. So that night we had together when we were out on patrol and that storm came through and we took shelter..." She replied and placed her hand over her stomach, feeling the little bump. There was long shocked pause between the two before she speaks up.

"Joel? Honey, are you...?" She started to asked but then Joel cups her face in his hands then leans in and kissed her on the lips. "Thank you." He whispers, his lips ghosting over her lips. (Y/n) let's out a breathless laugh and the couple share another loving kiss then embrace one another, relishing in this happy moment.

A moment that neither one of them ever dreamed would come true.

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artificialqueens · 5 years ago

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How Far I'll Go Chapter Six (Ninex) - Mia Ugly, Meggie

A/N: We’re baaaaack! Hi hello how are you? LIFE is crazy. We’re so sorry it took so long to get this chapter to you guys, but honestly, Snatch Game was probably the hardest thing we’ve written. It’s hard to be funny. I’m going to be way nicer to queens who do badly on Snatch Game from here on out because it’s not easy, mama. Anyway. We hope you enjoy this SUPER MEGA SIZED CHAPTER (10.5k!) to make up for the super long hiatus. And hopefully we’ll be back with more very soon. Come visit us on our blogs: @mia-ugly and @artificialmeggie

Previously: The runway was purple, but Blair’s Scarlett O'Hara realness wasn’t enough to save a poor performance and she was sent packing. Brooke and Vanjie are (most definitely) probably still messing around, and Nina and Monet had a moment backstage when Nina narrowly avoided elimination. Or was it a moment? Oh, and Nina’s probably losing his mind.

To come: Katya, Snatch Game, a hotel bar date, and a musical number.

Nina wakes up and is still on Drag Race.

He might be having some kind of a nervous breakdown (and breaking into song periodically) but that’s showbiz, kid.

And now it’s time for the fucking Snatch Game.

Shower, shave, dress.

Prepare for another sloppy Branjie moment in the elevator (and thank God, Nina gets to avoid that for a change). Nina Bo’nina is riding down alone, and the two of them chat distractedly on their way to the conference room.

A few of the mentors are there, but no Monét and no Trixie.

Nina tries not to let that bother him as he nibbles his toast and drinks his coffee. He’s focused this morning, ready for whatever happens next. He’s been thinking about Snatch Game since the moment he got the All Stars call, is determined that this is going to be his challenge (of course, he might have had that thought about the last challenge too… No, nope, move the hell on, girl.)

Nina doesn’t see Brooke until they film the Werk Room entrance. The man looks exhausted. There are circles under his eyes that the makeup guy has done his best to cover, but it’s still obvious Brooke is not at his best. It makes Nina remember that - no matter how stupid the Canadian is being about Vanjie (and no matter what sort of history he has with Nina’s equally stupid heart), Nina still loves him. Will probably always love him in some kind of way.

“No coffee this morning?” he asks quietly as they’re waiting to get mic’d.

“Not enough.” Brooke pulls down his hideous knitted beanie (where the hell does he keep getting those? A P.A. should - frankly - take them away.)

“Have a late night?” Nina doesn’t really want to know, but if Brooke needs to talk about it -

“Oh no. No. Just - thinking.” He rolls his neck. “Like - we know what’s coming up, right? And last season - it wasn’t my best look.”

Nina barks out a an embarrassingly loud laugh. “No kidding.”

“You didn’t have to find it that funny.”

“It’s pretty funny.”

“You’re a dick, you know that? No matter how sweet Monét thinks you are.”

This makes Nina stop laughing. “Sorry - what?”

“He was just going on about you when he was watching Asia film our scene last episode. Like - ‘try this, Nina does this, blah blah.’”

Nina doesn’t know what to think about that. It makes him feel a bit warm and light-headed, but absolutely incapable of responding.

“Clearly you’ve got her fooled. I know what you’re really like.”

“Haha, yeah.” Nina’s voice is weak and he hopes to God Brooke doesn’t immediately clock his blush. Luckily, Vanjie chooses that moment to start flirting with the sound guy, and Brooke’s attention is suddenly elsewhere. Yes, yes, that’s good. Nina will have to keep Vanjie close by at all times, just in case he needs to distract Brooke.

They all romp into the Werk Room together, Shea and Asia working their few seconds in the doorway for all it’s worth (“pose for me, pose for me, POSE”). They talk a bit about Blair going home, but before they can say much about it there’s the sound of a video message, and the television flickers to life.

“Ladies,” Ru’s face comes onto the screen. “I picked you queens for All Stars because you represent the best of the best. But on second thought… I think I’d like to see some other queens in your place. Sorry, not sorry.”

The video ends.

“What the hell does that mean?” Shea asks.

“Nah, nah.” Vanjie is shaking his head in denial. “We don’t need no more hos up in here. We got too many of y’all already.”

“Hello, hello, hello!” The door opens and Ru comes into the Werk Room, followed by the mentors. Nina tries to smile and look as excited to see Ru as he’s always supposed to be, but - he can’t help being worried about whatever the hell twist is coming up. (Monét winks at him as he comes in, so that’s something. Nina will keep that one brief moment like a diamond in his pocket.)

“Ladies, for this week’s maxi challenge, it’s time for another All Star Edition of Snatch Game!”

Most of the queens around Nina are delighted - except Brooke. Nina can see him smiling, but it’s fragile and fake, and his arms are folded very tightly around himself, legs crossed at the thigh even though he’s standing; a clear indication he’s stressing.

“This time, however, to celebrate my recent single ‘Queens Everywhere’— available now on iTunes—we’re going to do things a little bit differently. I know you’re all amazing queens, but for this Snatch Game, I’d like to see if you have any other queens inside you.” Ru raises a suggestive eyebrow. “Not to give Miss Vanjie an unfair advantage.”

Vanjie’s jaw drops even as he laughs, mutters “shade” through his perfect teeth.

“For this Snatch Game, I’m asking you to channel one of your sisters. We’ve had a lot of iconic queens on this series, so you’ll have plenty of personalities to choose from. And luckily you’ve got some experts here for inspiration. Hashtag Snatch Game All Stars. Gentleman, start your engines. And may the best All Star… win!”

“The fuck?” Vanjie whispers to Nina as soon as Ru leaves. “Bitch, I had a damn plan. I brought the little gold trophies and everything. Watched all the fucking movies. Now I got to be one of y’all’s tired asses? That ain’t fair.”

“Trophies, like - you mean Oscars?”

“Sure, whatever.”

Nina has to admit that he’s kinda thrilled about this twist. He’d been telling anyone who will listen who he was going to be for the Snatch Game if he ever got another chance. He’d had a couple back-ups, of course (they’d all been told to bring a former queen, so honestly, they should have seen this coming from a mile away), but this really couldn’t have gone better for him.

He feels bad for some of the other queens though, especially Vanessa (the bitch was prepped to do Meryl Streep - Brooke’s idea, and a fucking hilarious one. He’d kill to see it).

“X-Queens assemble,” Monét calls over at him, and Nina pats Vanjie on the shoulder, goes off to sit with Monét and Asia.

Monét looks good. Real good. He’s in some loud patterned sweatshirt that has tiny slices of pizza all over it, and another pair of thick-rimmed glasses (white, or maybe baby pink?), and he’s smiling at Nina like - no, nope. Move along.

“It’s actually the Avengers that assemble,” Asia tells Monét, who rolls his eyes at her.

“Girl, you can’t be a bigger nerd than me. I won’t accept it.”

“Yeah, ‘cause knowing about the Avengers is real obscure, serious fan-only shit.”

“The shade, Miss Asia! Nina West, are you going to defend your mentor?”

Nina holds his hands up. “You’re the fearless leader, you got this.”

“The pair of you.” Monét shakes his head. “All right, what you got for Snatch Game?”

“I’ma be Brown Cow Stun-ning, yes, honey.” Asia pops her tongue after a pretty admirable impression of Monique Heart.

“And Miss Nina West?” Monét is looking at him with an eyebrow raised. Nina wonders if he’s heard the interviews, if he already knows.

“Miss Vaaaanjie,” Nina says, “Bitch, you know I don’t play games. Don’t play Monopology, Uno, Twistah, Tag, Marbles -”

“Jesus Christ, stop it.” Monét is covering his face with his hands, while Asia is cackling. “Does she know?”

“Not yet.”

“She will live. Okay, okay, I ain’t worried about either of you. Take me straight to the finale, win me that serious mentor coin.”

They run through a couple ideas for jokes, focusing more on Asia (who struggled last time and still has a bit of anxiety flaring behind her contacts). There’s a break for lunch, but it’s weirdly quiet, subdued. Snatch Game is an opportunity to stand out, to prove you deserve to be there. It’s also an opportunity to crash and burn in front of Ru, the judges, and later on - the world. So there’s that.

After lunch everyone starts putting on their paint, fixing their wigs. The cameras zoom in to get some Werk Room chatter about who is playing who, and of course they’re all dying for Vanessa’s reaction (as soon as he sees Nina pull out his pink-petalled Barbie-head dress from its garment bag, the pussycat’s out of the Prada bag).

“Noooo, bitch,” Vanjie shouts across the room, but he’s smiling. “Oh, I’mma have to whup your ass if that’s what I think it is.”

“Deuces!” Nina shouts back at him, throwing up the sign as well, while Brooke covers his face.

“That ain’t right, it ain’t right. Thought we was friends, sis.” Vanjie is laughing about it, though; Nina knows they’re cool.

“Who are you playing, Miss Shea Coulée?” Asia calls over to her sister, who is fussing with a nasty looking green wig.

“Paaaarty…” Shea drags out the word, working that vocal fry for all she’s worth. “I’m going to be Adore Delano, darling.”

Nina Bo’nina Brown thinks this is the funniest thing she’s ever heard, can’t speak for laughing so hard. Shea seems entertained by it at first, but her smile starts to tighten a little after the laughter continues a bit too long.

“What’s so funny?”

“Nothing, nothing. Just - good luck, girl.”

“Who are you doing then?”

“Yeah,” Cracker interjects. “You were Jasmine Masters for your season’s Snatch Game right? The judges loved it.”

“Right. So why mess with perfection? I’m going to do Miss Jasmine Masters.”

A couple of the girls stop what they’re doing when she says this.

“You’re going to play the same queen?” Cracker repeats, a bit shocked.

“Yeah. I was sickening last time, I’ll be sickening this time.”

“Aren’t you worried that they’ll read you for not showing them what else you can do?”

“Nah. They’re gonna be laughing too hard.”

“Mmmm…” Vanjie makes a low, skeptical noise.

“Trust and believe, Vanjie,” Nina B. calls over to her. “Trust and believe.”

The cameras have to reset then to film Ru’s entrance into the Werk Room, and catch all the queens’ “surprised” reactions.

“Hello hello hello, kitty girls!”

Nina beams, claps his hands, that whole production. He’s feeling pretty good though - the energy is real. He’s actually excited for this challenge, ready to show Ru what he can do. (That’s how he felt last year too, then Silky went and yanked the win right out from under him. But no time to dwell on that now.)

“How are my All Stars? I thought I’d take a little look-see at what you were planning for us. And I brought along one of our extra special guest judges to help me out.”

From behind Ru, Katya Zamolodchikova comes in waving and smiling, teeth glowing white against her red lipstick.

“Oh my god! Get your own thing!” Trixie yells from across the room, and Katya does that ridiculous/adorable silent laugh that Nina has seen on “UNHhhh” too many times to count.

“Thanks for coming, Katya!” Ru says cheerfully.

“No problem, Ru. Thanks for unlocking the attic door!”

“Well, it was a special occasion. And I was feeling generous.”

They go from station to station, cameras following them around silently, and Nina fusses a bit with his dress while eavesdropping on their conversations with the other queens. There is a bit of concern for Brooke, who’s playing Detox (no big surprise there). How is Brooke going to make Detox funny seems to be the main issue. Nina has the same question. Brooke seems more confident than last season, though, so Ru and Katya wish him luck.

There’s some controversy over Nina Bo’nina playing Jasmine again, but the girl won’t be convinced to try something else. Nina listens to some of the critiques, ignores some of the others. He’s interested, but he also knows he needs to focus on his own performance, and not get in his head. He’s not as bad as Brooke at over-thinking things, but no one goes into goddamn musical theatre who isn’t at least a little bit destroyed (psychologically speaking. Okay, maybe also a bit romantically. It’s fine).

“Nina West!” Ru says close to Nina’s ear, and he almost jumps a foot in the air. (Girl, Katya is standing four feet away from you, be cool, be cool.)

“Hello, hello, hello Christine,” he says, immediately launching into his Vanjie impression. Both Ru and Katya laugh - and Katya’s smile up close is completely unfair, like a smile cut out of paper, perfect and sharp-edged.

(“I don’t know her!” Vanjie shouts from across the room.)

“So who are you going to be?” Katya asks, completely straight-faced, as soon as she and Ru have stopped laughing.

“I don’t know, still making up my mind,” Nina says, back in his normal voice.

“And the uh -” Ru gestures to the hideous floral Barbie dress, “gown?”

“Do you like it? One of my best gowns. What’s funny?”

Katya is wheeze-laughing. Katya is wheeze-laughing because of something Nina said! He stores that one next to the Monét gem from earlier; hopes to have enough for his own tiara in the unthinkable event that he doesn’t win.

“Now on Season 11’s Snatch Game, you were hilarious, you played -”

“Harvey Fierstein and Jo Anne Worley-”

“Yes! And really, it might have been one of the strongest performances in Snatch Game herstory.”

Nina smiles gratefully (only slightly furious that Ru’s saying this despite the fact that Nina didn’t win. He deserved to win).

“So how can you possibly outdo yourself this time?”

“I’m not trying to outdo myself, I’m trying to do something different. Like Katya, when you played Björk -”

“Yes, yes, back to me,” Katya says, nodding.

“Completely different from Suze Orman, but still so funny. That’s what I’m going to do. Just - mix it up.”

“All right, Nina, good luck. Can’t wait to see it,” Ru says, moving on.

It’s fine. It’ll be fine.

As soon as Ru and Katya leave the Werk Room it’s a mad dash to get dressed and made up and before Nina knows it, before he can light a bunch of candles on an altar and find whatever religion will bring him the most luck, they’re all being rounded up and led into the studio for the Snatch Game.

Okay.

Brooke’s Detox look is iconic, the yellow and black striped bandage dress from the Season 5 premiere (probably borrowed from Detox herself) hugs his perfectly padded body, but he’s absolutely trembling as he walks beside Nina. Nina has to squeeze his shoulder, tell him it’ll be fine.

“It’s fun, Brooke. Just have fun with it,” he murmurs as he hits the bright studio lights, has to blink until his vision adjusts (the first thing he sees is Monét and Nina’s blinded by him).

Okay.

The mentors are sitting along the sidelines, ready to watch the show play out. Nina wasn’t expecting that, but it’s - fine. Monét smiles at him, and Nina’s going to use that smile as a good luck charm - a rabbit’s foot, a four leaf clover, whatever. It’s impossible not to feel lucky when someone who looks like Monét goddamn X Change smiles at you like that.

“Welcome to the first All Stars ‘Queens Everywhere’ Snatch Game!” Ru says after they’re all mic’d and seated, upbeat music playing behind him. “Let’s meet our contestants.”

Katya beams from where she’s sitting behind her glittery podium and microphone.

“It’s everyone’s favorite queen that we found digging in the dumpster outside - Katya!”

“And yet I’m still hungry!”

Katya smiles at Ru and then snaps her teeth at the other queens.

“And - just when you thought we’d finally seen the last of her - halleloo! It’s Shangela!”

Shangela raises one hand in the air, nodding seriously. “That’s right, I’m back again, bitches. And I ain’t even in a box this time, baby.”

“Ladies, are you ready to meet the queens?”

“Yaaaaaaaaaas,” they answer in tandem.

They reset so that Ru can film the introductions, and Nina’s heart starts rattling like bones in a bag. He’s buzzing with adrenaline and nerves, but he’s going to channel that into a goddamn win. That’s right, he tells his inner saboteur - you can fuck off. This challenge is mine.

“The heart of Season 10 - Monique Heart is here!” Ru starts with Asia, whose Monique look is extremely correct.

“Hello world! Hello America! Are you brown cow stunning?” She tosses Ru a ridiculous cow-patterned baseball cap. Ru briefly feigns excitement before throwing it over his shoulder in distaste.

“Burn that,” he murmurs to one of the camera crew. “Next up, we have the original party-queen - Adore Delano!”

Shea Coulee stretches her arms in the air before making a peace sign, growling “Party,” in a gravelly voice.

“How are you doing Adore?”

“I mean, I’m good, you know? Like. Excited to be back. Where am I again?”

Nina has to turn his mouth into his shoulder to stifle the laugh that bubbles to his throat immediately. He wasn’t sold on it when they were discussing it in the Werk Room, but Shea is killing it as Adore. Her voice, her delivery is hilarious. The makeup is flawless. Her perpetual open mouth is complete perfection. As always, Shea Coulee is slaying the competition. Nina’s stomach gives a nervous jolt, so he sucks in a deep breath and reminds himself to pay attention.

He realizes he’s missed Ivy’s introduction, but Katya is gagged at the illusion of, well - Her - that Ivy is turning today. A mid-length honey blonde wig barely brushes Ivy’s shoulders and her red bustier is covered in rhinestones (and, of course, the scythe and hammer.) The look is great. The accent, on the other hand… Nina sighs a little, but tries not to get comfortable, regardless of how terrible Ivy’s Russian accent is.

Vanjie is seated at the end of the top row, decked out in red lace, a large pair of dark sunglasses balanced precariously on her nose. There’s no denying the air about her: Miss Vanjie is living Miss Valentina’s French vanilla fantasy, and no one could doubt it.

Ru beams at him. “Valentina! How wonderful to see you again!”

Vanjie draws in a deep breath. “That’s right, Ru, it’s me - Valentina. I’m back, and this time, I just want you to know, I fully learned all the words to ‘Greedy.’”

“Excellent! You want to sing us a verse right now?”

“No,” Vanjie answers, extremely primly, and even in his gravelly voice, the delivery is enough to make Ru laugh.

“Maybe next time.”

“Probably not.”

Then Ru’s looking at Nina and - oh, god, why did he think coming back for All Stars was a good idea again?

“Miss Vaaaaaanjie is here!” Ru trills.

Nina sucks in a deep breath and - “What’s the grease, mama?”

Down the row, Brooke buries his face in his hands, but his shoulders bounce with laughter. Ru is giggling loudly. Even Katya and Shangela are agape at the spot-on impression like it’s the first time he’s done it, the first time they’ve heard it.

He lets himself relax a little.

“Three seasons in a row.” Ru consults his cue cards. “Girl, aren’t you tired of competing yet?”

“Mmhmm.” Nina shakes his head vehemently, the wig he pilfered from Vanjie weeks ago flying around his shoulders. (He really does owe Brooke one for that.) “Nah, girl, you know I’m still trying to get my own show. Like Vanjie of Love or some shit like that. You know, something where these triflin’ hos gotta pay me some damn attention.”

In his periphery, Nina catches Brooke cut his eyes to him. He hopes this is okay. They haven’t really discussed the Branjie territory in regards to his jokes, but he kind of assumed it was fair game. Besides, he isn’t planning on directly hurting anyone’s feelings. He’ll keep it light, keep it fun. Besides, they’re the ones who marketed their portmanteau and gave the profits to charity. It’s practically public domain at this point.

“Next up we’ve got - oh my goodness, it’s Jasmine Masters!”

Nina Bo’nina gives Ru an extremely “over it” look. “Yeah, and I got something to say.”

“Now Jasmine - no tea, no shade, but haven’t you been on Snatch Game before?”

There’s a bit of an awkward pause before Nina Bo’nina waves him away.

“Bitch, I’ve got something more to say.”

Ru chuckles a bit, “I bet you do,” and moves on to Brooke.

“Another former All Star contestant, welcome Detox!”

Brooke looks sullen and concerned. He gives a little nod at Ru and the contestants.

“Detox, what’s the matter? You don’t look happy to be here.”

“Oh, am I not smiling?” Brooke asks through his extremely full, painted-on lips. “I can’t feel anything above my neck.” He shapes his mouth into a grotesque smile using his hands, and Ru almost doubles over. Okay, okay. Nina feels a little less worried about Brooke.

“And last but not least, we have - um, Aquaria! Hey girl!”

“Hi Ru!”

“Aquaria, is that the new way you’re spelling your name?” Cracker has written Acwareea on her name-card. A couple letters are backwards.

“Huh?” Cracker looks down at the name card. “Oh, I can’t spell my name. Actually, I can’t spell anything.”

“Okay then.”

“You know, some girls chose to read books, I chose to turn looks.”

“Yeah, you did! Now let’s get ready to play the Snatch Game!”

They break for a few adjustments on the cameras and microphones, and Nina tries not to hyperventilate, and then fuck - they’re rolling again.

“Here we go. The first question is for Katya. Katya, All Stars Season 1 paved the way, and brought back some of the most celebrated queens of all time to compete. This time, instead of competing in pairs, the queens are competing in BLANK.”

Be funny, be funny, be fucking funny. Nina tries to think like Vanjie and writes down an answer as soon as he’s got one, hoping it will be good enough.

“Okay, pens down. Katya?”

“I said competing in traction.”

“In - traction?”

“Yeah, you know, when all the bones in your body are broken and you’re in the hospital bed with your leg in the air.”

“That would certainly be a different kind of competition.”

“I’d watch it,” Katya says seriously, and Ru laughs.

“Let’s go to the Queens and see if we have any matches. Miss Valentina. What did you write down?”

Vanjie has put a lace mask on over the bottom of her face. She mumbles something indecipherable.

“What was that?” Ru asks. Vanjie mumbles something again.

“Valentina,” Ru says, clearly picking up on the joke. “Take that thing off your face.”

“I’d like to keep it on please.”

Ru shakes his head slowly, and at last Vanjie removes her mask.

“Now, Valentina. What did you write?”

Vanjie flips her card over, and Ru starts to wheeze with laughter. “That’s what I wrote down. I’d like to keep it on please.“

Vanjie’s Valentina voice is slipping, but she’s hella charming anyway, as always.

“I’m sorry, my dear, but that is not a match. Moving on to Aquaria - oh! You’ve got a new outfit.”

Miz Cracker was scrambling to put on a new wig and geometric headpiece made of iPhones while Ru was speaking to the contestants. She looks great, and she’s killing Aquaria’s affected head wobble.

“This season the queens are competing in BLANK.”

Cracker flips her card to reveal Aquaria’s instagram URL. “I wasn’t born when All Stars Season 1 aired, so I just wrote this.”

“Oh, okay - not a match.”

“I’m young,” Cracker insists, and Ru nods, patiently.

“We all were once. What did Miss Vaaaaanjie have to say?”

“I said we’d have to compete in swimsuits,” Nina says, flipping over his card.

“Swimsuits?”

“Yeah. Cause maybe then Michelle won’t read my ass for filth every damn week.”

Ru gapes at him, like he can’t believe he just came for Michelle in Snatch Game.

“Swimsuits be glamor when everybody else is doing them too, bitch!” Nina pops his tongue.

Ru laughs, high and clear, and then turns to the other Nina. “What about you, Jasmine? What do you have to say?”

Nina Bo’nina slaps her hands on the table and purses her lips. “We gonna be competing in making viral videos to get Justin Bieber’s attention, Ru.”

The room — pauses while Ru tries to save face with a polite chuckle. Nina West can practically hear the shade rattle sound effect that will inevitably be edited in at this exact moment.

Jasmine Masters probably wasn’t Nina Bo’nina’s best option (anyone could have told her that and, good god girl, they really tried). It’s not working. Nina doesn’t think any of it’s working.

Ru clears his throat, shakes his head. “I’m certain you could teach them a thing or two about that, but unfortunately, it’s not a match.”

Nina Bo’nina shrugs.

Ru shuffles his cue cards and moves on. “This next question is for Shangela. In All Stars Season 2, we changed things up by letting the queens choose who would be eliminated. This season, as well as eliminating each other, the queens will have to BLANK each other.”

There’s the scribbling of markers from the queens around Nina (who like to think he’s got this answer down blind.)

“Okay, pens down. Shangela? This season, the queens will also have to…”

“I knew what y’all were looking for, because y’all are nasty…” Shangela turns her card around. “But I’m a lady, so I said they’d have to ‘tuck’ each other.”

“Tuck each other!”

“Sometimes a girl needs a helping hand, mama.”

“Ain’t that the truth. Let’s see if we have any matches! Katya, what did you say?”

Ivy looks a bit startled to be called on first, but she beams with her red lips, flips her card over. “I said eat each other. To consume each other’s power and fill the gaping void that lives -” She pats her chest. “Right here.”

Katya (the real Katya) shrieks, but Ru shakes his head.

“I’m sorry, that’s not a match.”

“Da,” Ivy says solemnly, in her terrible Russian accent. “Da. It never is match. Like me and Trixie. Match but… No match.”

And, okay, Nina might imagine it, but it seems like the studio goes eerily quiet as everyone waits for Trixie’s reaction. She’s smiling, but it looks forced. Katya clears her throat but laughs, which seems to dispel the weird tension that formed.

Ru, oblivious to the entire thing, moves on. “Miss Vaaaanjie, what did you say?”

Nina sighs and flips his card, feeling pretty pleased with himself. “I said date each other. You know, I still be lookin’ for that Notebook shit.”

“Oh yeah, we know. No more Post-Its, right?”

“No more Post-Its, never again. I ain’t got the time, Mary!” He glances over at Brooke, raises his eyebrows seductively. “Hey, how you doin’?” Behind him, the real Vanjie mumbles something under his breath.

“I’m sorry, my dear, that’s not a match.”

“Bitch, it might be!” Nina says, still looking at Brooke, and Ru bends over laughing, stomping his foot into the ground. It’s adrenaline, it’s power, it’s like Nina knows this challenge is his.

“You ain’t even know!” he continues, channeling angry Vanessa as much as possible. “Just ‘cause one tall blonde bitch did me wrong don’t mean they all will. Shit.” Nina crosses his arms over his chest, leans back in his chair, sees Brooke duck his head and blink rapidly a few times.

That might have been too much. He just got caught in the moment and… Fuck. Dial it back a little, but stay focused.

“Moving on to Aquaria,” Ru says. Aquaria, this season the queens will have to BLANK each other.”

“I said ‘copy each other,” Cracker says tightly, in Aquaria’s low voice. “And it’s too bad Miz Cracker isn’t here. Maybe then she would have won something.”

“Oho!” Ru laughs, a bit scandalized. “Not a match, my dear.”

Cracker shrugs and throws the card over her shoulder. “Someone save that so I can call and ask Cracker if she wants more of my sloppy seconds.”

“Adore Delanoooo!” Ru trills the last syllable as he turns to Shea, who tosses the long green waves over her shoulder.

She flashes Ru one of Adore’s signature winking, mouth-open, tongue-out smiles with a peace sign.

“What did you write down, darling?”

“I said ‘party with each other,’” Shea drawls in Adore’s affected tone, adding more fry than is entirely necessary, but it gets the point across. She’s goofy and perfect.

“Party with each other,” Ru repeats.

“Yeah! I mean, you guys all look super cool. I’d hang out with you, smoke a blunt, eat some pizza. You know, party!”

Ru tsks. “Sounds like a great Tuesday night, but unfortunately not a match.” He turns to face the contestants, where Katya is sitting with her hands folded primly on her stack of cards. “Back to Katya! In All Stars Season 3, BenDeLaCreme shocked the judges by sending herself home. This season, Michelle Visage will shock everyone by BLANKING herself.”

Katya takes a minute to ponder, pressing her index finger to her lips then writes something on her card. Nina and the other queens follow suit, and when their time is up, Katya is smiling ferociously.

“Let’s see what our contestant put down. Katya?” Ru faces her. “Michelle Visage will shock everyone by doing what?”

Katya clears her throat. “I could have gone the obvious route, you know.”

“Obviously,” Ru says.

“Instead, I said, ‘sacrificing herself.’”

“Sacrificing herself?”

“With fire. To the Gods, honey.”

“Okay… Any particular God?”

“…Satan.”

“Of course. Let’s go to our queens. Detox, this season Michelle Visage will shock everyone by…”

Brooke flips his card over. “I said motorboating herself. I mean, if anyone could do it -”

“I don’t know how shocking that would be… but either way, I’m sorry, not a match. Vanessa Vanjie Mateo! What did you say, my dear?”

Nina flips over his card. “I said cloning herself.”

“Cloning herself?”

“Mmm-hmm. Need two of her to manage your ass.”

Ru laughs, and Nina thanks every God he knows the name of. The burn landed!

“And now she got that done, she’s gonna clone me some Canadian bacon.”

“Is that right?”

“Hell yeah it is.” Nina does not look at Brooke or Vanjie. “But only the good parts, baby. Trim all the fat; I’m a growing girl, need more protein in my diet.”

“Bitch, you couldn’t handle that much protein,” Vanjie-as-Valentina cuts in, and Ru fans himself.

“A controversial question! Let’s go to Monique Heart, see what she said. Michelle Visage will shock everyone by…”

“I said believing in herself.” Asia-as-Monique-turns her face to the camera. “Like I believe in myself, America. And that’s why I’d like to take this moment to announce my run for office.”

“Which office is that?”

“Whichever.” Asia’s got Monique’s flighty passion down perfectly. “One of the big ones, you know. And thank you, America, for your trust. I won’t let you down.”

Ru reads the last question of the night. “In All Stars Season 4, history was made when we celebrated the first Drag Race double crowning. This season, we’ll be making history with a double BLANK.”

Shangela is already shaking her head knowingly. There’s a scrabble of writing from the queens.

“Ladies, pens down. Shangela?”

“I’m giving the people what they want, Ru. I ain’t proud. I had to say a double fisting.”

“Did you really have to say it though?”

“Actually, mama, I did. The PAs have my children.”

“Ha! All right ladies, let’s see if we have any matches. Adore Delano. This season we’ll be making history with the first double BLANK.”

Shea holds up her card proudly. “I said the first double… elimination.”

Ru is quiet for a moment. “That’s actually been done before.”

“It has?”

“A couple of times, actually.”

“Oh.” Shea is unfazed. “Well. I don’t watch the show.”

Ru wheeze laughs, and so does Nina.

“I mean, I don’t know who any of you people are.”

“Sorry, Adore. Not a match.”

Shea shrugs, flashes a peace sign.

“What about you Katya?” Ru moves over to Ivy.

“Well, I thought about what Trixie and I like to do behind the scenes of ‘UNHhhh’ and I just had to put - fisting!” She flips her card.

“It’s a match!” Ru exclaims.

Everyone is laughing, but Nina can’t help check out the subjects of Ivy’s joke. The real Katya Zamo is smiling but - her teeth look clenched. And over with the mentors, Trixie Mattel is not smiling at all. She’s staring at her hands in her lap, systematically picking at the baby pink polish that adorns her fingernails. Hopefully none of the cameras pick up on that.

“I’ll see you later tonight!” Ivy continues, pointing at Trixie. There’s a halfway amused smile on Trixie’s face right away, but Nina feels like he was punched in the stomach. Something’s going on between the two of them, clearly. It hurts to watch - not like watching Vanjie and Brooke hurts (that’s more like watching two attractive bricks smash together). But Trixie and Katya - there’s so much history there. So much darkness. And God knows enough people have been convinced they’re in love -

“Monique Heart, what did you put down? This season we’ll be making history with the first double BLANK.”

“I said the first double crowning, dahling.”

“I’m sorry Monique, we already did that as well.”

“I know y’all did it, but I feel like it didn’t really count because my ass wasn’t wearing one of those crowns. It should have been me, and that’s a fact, America. And facts are - what? Facts.”

Ru laughs for a moment before turning to Nina. “What about Miss Vaaaanjie?”

“I said the first double wedding. And before y’all even ask: I do.” Nina glances over at Brooke, hoping he isn’t hitting this note a bit too hard.

“You do? Who’s the other happy couple?”

Ivy interrupts before Nina can answer. “Trixie! I’ve been meaning to ask you!”

“Oh honey,” Trixie calls out, looking flushed and uncomfortable. “I know I said I’d give more to charity this year, honey, but my generosity has limits.”

Behind her podium, Katya’s face is absolutely expressionless.

“Well, queens, we’re out of time,” Ru announces. “Which means the winner is… Xanax! Talk to your pharmacist. See you next time on the Snatch Game!”

Nina throws ‘deuces’ at the cameras as they get some closing B-roll, keeping up his Vanjie-persona until the very end. As soon as the director yells “cut!” Nina lets out the breath he’s been holding for the past two hours. God, it went by fast, but now he’s feeling every second of it. His muscles ache like he ran a marathon this morning and then tried kick-boxing for the first time.

“Nice work, ladies,” P.A.’s are congratulating them as they leave the set, but Nina barely hears a word. He de-drags, does some of the talking head interviews he loves so much (has to look shady about Nina B.’s performance, and worried about Brooke. Nina doesn’t put on an act or anything - he is kinda worried about Brooke. Brooke did ‘okay’ - better than Celine for sure - but didn’t stand out the way some of the other queens did. And if Brooke goes home tomorrow night - fuck. Nina doesn’t quite know how he feels about that).

Brooke was also kind of weird as they took off their paint in the Werk Room. Nina thought at first that he was in his head about the Snatch Game, but now he’s starting to wonder if his answers as Vanjie might have fucked Brooke up a bit. He hasn’t had a chance to address it, but he’s going to have to tomorrow, just to make sure they’re cool. He thinks it will be okay. He’s pretty sure. Basically. Almost positive.

Nina might be working through some latent confidence issues as he pushes himself for four miles on the elliptical later that night in the hotel (work through the pain, he reminds himself), but it’s fine really. Nothing to see here. Move along.

His legs ache and his face drips sweat, but he feels—good, actually. Solid about his performance. (He did last year, too, but he’s trying not to think about that.)

Dolly is singing about ways to make a living in his ears. He’s not assuming - but he is preparing. Just in case. If he has to lipsync for his legacy, he wants to be ready. Wants to win this one more than any other challenge, and call him crazy, but he feels like there’s a real chance. He can’t pinpoint why exactly, but there’s some kind of feeling settling down into his bones, making him think that maybe maybe maybe—

Underneath that, something uncomfortable has wormed its way into his psyche. It has almost nothing to do with the actual competition. It’s stupid and predictable and oh-so-not what he should be concerned with while on the set of All Stars for Christ’s sake. But he is and he’s here and he’s feeling things, and Nina taught himself a long time ago that feeling things fully for a while and then letting them go is far more beneficial to his mental health than taking the Brooke route and bottling everything up and burying it under vodka cranberries and couch cushions.

So sure. Okay. He’s feeling some kind of way about this thing that he saw that he wasn’t even supposed to see and isn’t even any of his business, but that’s just Nina’s luck for you. So that’s what he focuses on (or tries not to) as he turns up the resistance and pushes through the last of his workout.

He’d risked a glance back at Monét right before the PAs had shoved them off the soundstage. He’s in the business of gem collecting now, savoring those moments, polishing them up for later use, and maybe he wanted a ruby tinted the exact shade of Monét’s lipstick as they’d smiled across the room at each other.

Instead, he’d seen Monét reaching out to Shangela, crimson lips puckered, arms outstretched, ready for the kiss Nina couldn’t make himself watch.

Maybe they had kissed, Nina didn’t know; he’d made himself turn away before he could inflict any more psychological damage on himself. (He’s choosing healthier options now, remember.)

Of course they hadn’t had a moment after the last runway. Why would he think that? When Monét could have anyone he wants, and Nina is practically an amorphous blob. Like. He knows drag queens are all touchy-cuddly most of the time, and he knows that there’s probably nothing going on between Monét and pretty, perfect, halleloo-ing Shangela. But there could be, right? And goddamn, that would actually make sense. As opposed to whatever madness was going on in Nina’s head last night.

He adds even more resistance to the elliptical - just for “fun.” Or maybe spite. And yeah, okay, one night of really solid work in the hotel gym isn’t going to turn him into Naomi Smalls with legs up to his asshole or anything, but it’s a start. And the sooner Nina can convince himself that he isn’t doing this for Monét (or anyone other than himself because he likes exercise, damn it), the better.

He’s a grown-ass adult. He recognizes delusion when he sees it in the mirror every morning. It’s time to face facts—he and Monét had one (wondrously) sensual, albeit (incredibly) drunken night months ago. Monét had left the ball in Nina’s court. Nina was too chickenshit to do anything about it. Now they’re tentative friends (Monét is his mentor after all), Nina might be going crazy (this whole bursting-into-song-but-not-really thing has gone too far), and it’s all just so messy.

Nina wipes his face, stretches, and heads out of the hotel gym. He probably looks like a sweaty disaster (okay, there’s no ‘probably’ about it) and he’s waiting for the elevator down to the floor with his room, when the doors “ding” open and he’s face to face with Monét.

Could be worse. Could be Branjie again.

“Get in loser, we’re going drinking!” Monét says, with a wide smile on his face.

He’s so fucking charming that Nina momentarily forgets that he himself is a hot damn mess. Literally, like hot. Dripping with sweat.

“Um.” He gets into the elevator anyway because - he’s gotta go somewhere. “Are we?”

“If you want.” Monét gets strangely shy as soon as the elevator doors close. Or maybe that’s just in Nina’s mind. “Was the Mean Girls reference too much? I feel like maybe it’s played out.”

Nina laughs out loud, awkwardness momentarily forgotten. Monét never seems anything but confident and composed, and that one moment of doubt is - surprisingly endearing.

Not that confident, composed Monét isn’t completely endearing as well. Like. It’s all good. It all works a little too well for Nina. Everything about Monét is working a little too well for Nina lately.

Shit, the elevator is moving, decision-making time is limited.

“I kinda look like - this?” Nina waves a hand at his damp self.

“Fine as hell, girl,” Monét says with a grin, “and no pressure, obviously. Though if I’m drinking alone at the hotel bar, it’s going to look a little sad. And, look, I can make sad work for me, that’s not a problem. But after the day I’ve had -”

“Oh, the day you’ve had. Yeah, I forgot how stressful it must have been. Competing on a reality show and all that.”

“Fuck off. Uh oh, we’re passing your floor -”

“How do you know which floor is mine?”

Monét blinks at him, briefly speechless, mouth agape. (It makes something spark like a firework in Nina’s chest, shoot colours across the night sky.) The moment passes and then Monét doesn’t even have the decency to look embarrassed, just smiles like a gorgeous monster as he taps his temple. “That’s classified mentor information.”

“Yeah?”

“Hell yeah. You don’t want to know about my top-secret dossier.”

“No, I - don’t.”

“You sure you don’t?” Monét winks at him, and the elevator dings as it reaches the ground floor. “Ah, shit, missed your stop. Better come do shots with me.”

“I mean, I could just press the button again.” Nina doesn’t know why he’s resisting, he wants to get tipsy with Monét more than he wants to do most things (aside from win All Stars and run for office someday maybe).

“Nah, girl, this elevator only goes down. One-way elevator. Sorry, should have told you.”

“Guess I’m out of options.”

“Guess so.”

They look at each other. Nina remembers the man that asked him up to his room the night of the finale. Nina remembers the taste of his mouth, the way Monét kept kissing him, like he couldn’t get enough. Nina -

- is clearly exhausted. And still delusional. But fuck it.

They go to the hotel bar (isn’t this how all the bad stories start?) and Monét buys them both a tequila sunrise and tells Nina way more than he should about Trixie Mattel.

“So her man and her are split. She’s feeling some kind of way about it.”

“Of course she is. Haven’t they been together for, like, ever?”

“Something like that. Fuck.” Monét drains his drink, motions for another round. “We’ve been talking about it, but I’m not - you know. I love her, she’s incredible, but - I’m not - her best friend.”

“You’re not Katya,” Nina says quietly, and Monét scrubs his hands over his face.

“Yeah. That.”

“So why isn’t she talking to Katya, then? You guys have your phones; Katya’s here now, for Christ’s sake.”

Monét shrugs. “Beats me.”

“Are they -” Nina doesn’t have any right to this information, but - he figures that Monét wants to talk about it. “Potentially… do you think -”

“Who the fuck knows? Honestly, when I said I’d come back to do this show, I did not think it would be like being in high school again. Like who is crushing on who, who is hooking up, it -” He darts a look over at Nina and then snaps his mouth shut. “I mean.”

Nina looks away. Finishes his second drink a bit too quickly. “You want another?”

“Okay,” Monét answers before Nina can even finish the sentence.

The bartender is particularly attentive, gets another round in front of them right away. He’s got a lot of smiles for them both, says, “This round’s on me, I’m a huge fan,” as he walks off to help another customer, and Nina - can’t help it, he’s a masochist - raises an eyebrow at Monét.

“Think you’ve got an admirer.”

“Yeah?” Monét rolls his eyes. “More like you do.”

“Should we turn this into an awful romantic comedy where we make a bet about who he likes more?”

Monét laughs like he’s shocked at himself. “Girl! Okay, but what happens at the end? Who wins?”

“Well, if we’re following the formula, we probably both realize that real love was right in front of - you know, I don’t know. You, you win.” Fuck fuck fuck, what the hell is Nina even saying? He watched too many Hallmark movies last Christmas. “That voice, that ass, right?” He tries to make it into a joke, even with Monét’s eyes all honeyed and serious on his face.

Monét purses those perfect lips, presses them into a semi-smile. “Just… didn’t want to assume nothing.”

They talk for another couple drinks, and it’s - shit, it’s easy. It’s never this easy with someone Nina likes. He knows he can be funny, knows he can bring out the charm (with the right amount of alcohol in his system) but usually if there are feelings involved it all goes to hell. Nina gets weird and in his head and laughs too loudly and spills his drink everywhere.

But with Monét - it shouldn’t be like this. It shouldn’t be this easy, especially with all the longing covering up the background like terrible flowered wallpaper. It shouldn’t be this easy for Nina to stop over-thinking things and just exist in the presence of this gorgeous person.

But it is. It is easy. That’s the worst part of it all.

Monét is laughing and grabbing for his arm (just like finale night in the other hotel bar) and there’s heat in Nina’s cheeks that isn’t just from the alcohol, and Monét’s lips are glistening and wet as he pulls the straw between them and sips every last bit of the cocktail into his mouth.

Nina swallows thickly, leans into the sound of Monét’s deep rumbling laugh, reaches for his knee when he starts to slip off the hotel barstool.

How many drinks are they in now? Four? Five? More? The room is spinning.

Nina is laughing. Light, airy. Not giggling exactly but laughing and his cheeks are burning and Monét is looking at him through narrowed eyes.

“Be careful, Nina West,” Monét says, and his voice is low and dangerous. “Be careful lookin’ at people like that. They might get… ideas.”

Nina’s breath hitches in his throat and he swallows hard. “Ideas?”

“I might get ideas.” Monét smiles crookedly; his eyes are half-closed and sleepy as he rests his chin on his hand and leans against the bar. “You never texted me.”

Nina’s so glad he’s drunk. So glad he missed his floor, even if it has led to this. Because this conversation, this thing has hung between them for the entirety of filming and it hasn’t been uncomfortable exactly (because they’re adults, thank you very much), but it hasn’t been wonderful either. And Nina more than anything wants to rewind back to May, go to lunch, talk about anything and everything and nothing with Monét until they fall back into hotel sheets and kiss and kiss and kiss until—

“Why didn’t you ever text me?”

Nina clears his throat. “I was… I… I wanted to.”

“But?” Monét’s eyes are wide and pleading now. Still glassy with the alcohol, but inquisitive, bright, waiting to see how Nina is going to explain himself.

Nina is too, to be honest.

So he shakes his head. “I don’t know. Honestly. I don’t have a good reason. I wanted to. I should have.”

Monét ducks his head, takes the paper straw from his drink and twirls it between his middle and ring finger. It sends tiny droplets of tequila sunrise all over the wooden bartop.

“I thought about that night a lot, Nina West,” Monét says quietly, wiping at the droplets with a damp beverage napkin. “I don’t do that. That’s not like me.”

“Me either,” Nina says.

Nina knows that if they were sober this would be a very different conversation. There would definitely be more emotions, there might even be some yelling (although that doesn’t really seem like Monét’s thing and he’s never been one to raise his voice, so maybe not). Either way, they aren’t sober, and now they’re the sleepy kind of drunk and exhausted, so they just sit there at the bar staring at each other, not sure what to say next.

“Why’d you pick me?” Nina finally asks. “For the competition? Because of… that night?”

Monét shrugs and pulls his credit card out of the back pocket of his jeans. “Just wanted to win, girl. That’s it.”

“Shit, I don’t have—”

Monét waves him off. “I got it. Consider it after-hours mentoring.”

Nina thanks him repeatedly as they stand (clumsily) and make their way out of the hotel bar (stumblingly) and back to the elevator. When the doors shut behind them, Nina has a brief flash of all the things that two consenting adults can get up to in an elevator (some of which he has seen in recent days). But no. No. They had their chance, right? The ship has sailed.

Nina’s room is a few floors beneath the mentors’ (apparently), so he steps off before Monét.

“Can you find your way back to your room?” Monét asks, and Nina wishes he could says ‘no. No, I’m going to get completely lost, no, I’ll fall down every two steps if I don’t have you holding me up. No, I need you to linger in my doorway, I need to panic about whether I should try to kiss you goodnight, I need to think about inviting you in.

(I wouldn’t. Of course I wouldn’t. So - unprofessional. But - it’d be nice to think about.)’

“Yeah.” He smiles. “I’ll manage.”

Monét grins. Nina likes to think there’s a bit of disappointment around the edges of it, but he’s also a couple drinks in, and wears the rosiest of glasses at the best of times.

“Thanks for the company and conversation, Nina West.”

Nina nods. Doesn’t touch him, doesn’t look over his shoulder at Monét as he leaves the elevator.

But he doesn’t go back to his room either.

He wanders the hotel. Presses the down button and gets on a different elevator a few minutes later.

Nina’s going to regret this tomorrow when he’s exhausted, but he just can’t imagine shutting himself in his dark little room and lying down right now. He’s vibrating, on edge. It’s a bad idea, because there’s nothing more depressing than a silent hotel after midnight - something about the lateness of the hour makes all the shine come off. Nina’s feet lead him down one hallway and down another, and he doesn’t realize he’s heading to their usual breakfast-conference room until he hears… music?

Yes, there’s definitely music coming out of there, the casual strumming of a stringed instrument that doesn’t have anywhere to go. Someone might be humming too, it’s hard to tell from a distance.

Nina follows the sound.

The door is open, just a bit, and all the lights are on. Sitting alone in the room is Trixie Mattel, bent in concentration over her autoharp.

Out of drag, she looks smaller, more vulnerable. It’s clear just how young she is. She’s picking at a tune, murmuring something under her breath. Nina suddenly feels a warm breeze against his skin, and the melody that Trixie’s playing becomes clearer, a delicate bluegrass riff that would be at home on Nina’s old Emmylou Harris or Linda Ronstadt records.

Along with the warm breeze comes a gust of dandelion seeds, floating through the hallway like tiny wisps of cotton. Nina feels like he’s alone with Trixie in the middle of a waving wheat field, sun-baked and desolate. He can smell the cracked soil beneath his feet, hear the sound of crickets chirping in time with Trixie’s brittle melody.

Oh no. That thing is happening again.

Trixie starts to sing:

“You’re the brightest star in any room.

I’m never lonelier than when I’m with you.

I miss something that’s never happened.

I miss a place I’ve never been to.”

Her voice is quiet at first, but it grows louder.

“There are some bridges that you cannot cross

Say it again ‘til I convince myself

But all this certainty it feels like loss.

I wouldn’t risk this much for no one else.”

Trixie gets to her feet, starts walking through the wheatfield as she sings the chorus.

“And there’s a wide field between us

How you traveled all those miles without me I don’t understand

I’m always on the edge of falling

And you could pull me over just by reaching out your hand

If you’d only take that chance.”

She keeps plucking at the harp, and Nina feels words welling up inside him, ready to spill from his mouth (when he starts singing, he’s thinking of Monét. Because of course he is.)

“This sort of thing, it don’t come easy

I never know just what to do or say

It feels impossible, believe me

That you would ever look at me that way.”

He thinks of Monét’s lips on Shangela’s after the Snatch Game. He thinks of Monét’s eyes on him at the bar. (“Be careful lookin’ at people like that, Nina West.”)

“There are some bridges that you cannot cross

I built up walls around this paper heart

But when I see you I forget it

All of the reasons we should be apart.”

Trixie harmonizes along with Nina as he sings the chorus.

“And there’s a wide field between us

How I traveled all these miles, baby, I don’t understand

I’m always on the edge of falling

And you could pull me over by just reaching out your hand

But could I ever take that chance?”

Nina sings the last line one more time, feeling the weight of his hopeless longing rising like a tide inside his chest. “If you’d only take that chance…”

“Nina?”

“Um.”

Trixie is sitting in the conference room, staring at him. She’s holding her autoharp but there’s no flowing wheatfields or whatever. Somehow Nina ended up in the doorway, just standing there. Fuck’s sake. Is he dissociating? Musically??? This is unbearable.

“How long have you been there?” Trixie asks, confused.

“Um, just got - here, so -” Nina’s face is probably turning bright red, and he’s hoping against that he hasn’t just been shouting song lyrics blankly at a terrified Trixie Mattel for the past few minutes. “Are you okay?”

Trixie winces. Then she nods.

“Yeah, of course. Just - yes. Couldn’t sleep. Figuring some - stuff out. You?”

“Just - you know. Having an emotional spiral.”

“Oh honey…” Trixie’s smiling but her voice is soft and sad. “My first perm was an emotional spiral, honey.”

Nina laughs in a brittle way, because 1) Trixie’s hilarious and 2) it’s obvious she’s trying to make him feel better.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not right now,” Trixie sighs, shakes her head. “But thanks.”

Nina leaves her to it. After - whatever that just was - he feels ready to crash at long last. He’s still a bit buzzed from the tequila, but his nervous energy has banked, and he heads back to his room. He’s ready to sleep, ready to deal with tomorrow when it gets here.

So of course, there’s someone waiting for him outside his room.

“Nina West.” Maya the P.A. gives him a slow, broad smile the moment he comes into view. “Found your way back, hey? Great. We need to talk.”

Interlude: Trixie

Conversation with:

swamp thing

i cunt believe i agreed to this

Fuck autocorrect CANT

It knows what you REALLY MEANT

It knew i was texting you and assumed

I’ll take it

You’ll take anything

I ain’t proud mama

I’m hunnnnnngry

For serious though, things okay there?

For serious serious

4 C-ri-us

GROSS

That’s gonna be my dj name

Please welcome to the stage

Why do I talk to you

Why do i even know you

Yes things are find its just weird

Being back on set

And like also runnign a business and

planning a tour and all of it. At least

they let us keep our phones

Must be hard being successful

I’m crying for you

I didn’t know you could still produce tears

I squeeze em out

Like milking a cow

Just need the right suction

Stop talking to me

What can you say that you won’t get sued for

I want drama

Who’s fisting who

Ha monet wishes she was fisting someone

Shes like middle school crushing on a queen here

Its kinda cute and sad

If love isn’t pathetic i don’t want it

And there’s last seasons whole thing

#branjie

sell those hats

That is not about hats

I saw them at a show in LA last summer

They’re fucked up in love, mama

IN LOVE???

Who even are you

I’m a person who has eyes

that can see things

Are they not together? They’re togther right?

NOPE

Are you fucking kidding

I don’t believe it

Since when are you this romantic

I’m not romantic

I have no romance in my bones

It’s just OBVIOUS

Well not to them

Ahhhh the gays

When will we figure our shit out

Realize what’s right in front of us

You gone?

Yeah sorry

Going to pass out

Don’t die or anything

Whiel i’m gone

Aren’t you sweet

Conversation with:

sure thing

Doing anything fun tonight?

Or just missing me

Babe?

Ok sorry filming again

Call you on break

Do not let me do this again

I don’t care what they offer me

(id o care what they offer me)

Breaks over talk to you after?

How was your day?

Call me if you want

I’m done for the night

Just getting white girl wasted alone

In my hotel room

At the mini bar yes i’m that famous now

I’m gonna crash call me if you get this

Love u

Conversation with:

swamp thing

I dreamt that i was in a bsatroom

At mcdonalds that one you puked in

After the show in philadelphia

Do you remember? Probably not

And you were there and fucking

Gordon ramsay was there (!!!)

And he wad hitting on you

And i wasd so pissed off

And thrn this lady came in and was like

‘You can’t be in here, this is for ronald only” And i fully shot her with a GUN

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN TRACY

I just woke up and feel like a monster

She was just doing her job

Ronald mcdonald needs his private shitter

And i just killed her

I killed a living dream person

Thank you for sharing this with me

I feel so close to you right now

Yeah i don’t confess dream murder

to just ayone

But WHAT DOES IT MEAN???

Latent Ronald mcdonald fetish

Clearly

I’m not a doctor or anythng

But i’m sorry you’re dying

Yep yep makes sense

I always knew it would end like this

fuck/marry/kill

me/gordan ramsay/ronald mcD

(you wanna know what the D stands for)

No i want to sleep

For 3 more hours

But i’m on reality tv again

You should havw stopped me

Maybe this dream was a warning!

I’m supposed to save you

From endng up on Chopped

What did you dream about?

U have to tell me even if it’s sexy

That’s the law

Another teeth falling out one

Mama you know that’s my kink

Conversation with:

sure thing

Good morning sexy thing

I’m so tiiiiiired

Don’t make me get up yet

Hey are u alive?

Yes

Yay u r alive!

I called u yesterday night

And at lunch

U ok?

Did u get my messages?

yes

Can i call you?

I miss your voice

I cant talk right now

Sorry

I’ll call you tonight

After filming?

Sure

Love u gorgeous

Hey just called left a message

Give me a shout later

I miss you

Brian

Have you seen the pics

from the MTV Movie Awards?

Ummm ok

No i’ll look them up

Fuck my lashes are so uneven

U breaking up with me over lashes

Lol

U and kat are pretty cuddly

Haha

are u being serious

Ur joking

Are u ok? Can i call u?

I’m out right now

Call you when i get home

But we’ve talked about this before right

U know we’re friends

Me and Kat

We’re just friends

U know this

Yeah i have lots of friends

And we don’t hold hands and kiss eachother

All the fucking time

So we’re fdoing this over text?

Is that what we’re doing

No i’ll call u later

Call me ok? I love u

U cannot be jealous of katya

She’s my Business Partner

And it’s DRAG

We touch each otehr all the time

We all do

Gotta go call u later

Conversation with:

swamp thing

Can we talk?

Not if ur busy

Let me just stop blowing this senator

And kick the clowns out

And get thes handcuffs off

No i’m not worth it

Keep these good things goin

It was winding down anyway

Gettin awkward

I have yoga tomorrow

Whats up pussycat

This is gonna sound really weird

Have you seen the pics of us

from the movie awwrds

Probably blocked them out

why????

am i like a troll

No more than usual

David texted me about them

And he’s all pissed off??

Because of us holding hands

Like so so stupid right

WHAT???!

Thats crazy!

Im so sorry

This isn’t the handmaids tale

He can calm his tits

(sorry, not to attack him just) Has he seen our shows??

What did you tell him

To fucking call me!!!

And he hasn’t

And i’m on this stupid set and can’t just go

See him and convince him how crazy he is

I’m so sorry

Do you want me to call him

I’ll call him

Tell me what to say

No don’t

Don’t worry

Its fine

I’ll talk to him

Conversation with:

swamp thing

Hey are you awake

If youre awake call me

david and I are done

over the phone

FUN

sorry you’re clearly asleep

I’m just a little drunk

brian

he said some things

that ive been thinking about

maybe call me tomorrow if u can

guess ill see you soon anyway

dont die while im gone

miss u

#rpdr fanfiction #nina west #monet x change #vanessa vanjie mateo #brooke lynn hytes #ninex #eventual branjie #background trixya #smut #angst #musical #all stars au #how far i'll go #hfig #mia ugly #meggie #concrit welcome #on set fic

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aliceslantern · 7 years ago

Text

Nocturnal Memory, a Kingdom Hearts fanfic, chapter 30

[Summary: Dying takes a lot out of you, it's true, but when Demyx wakes up for the first time since his fight with Sora nothing's right. His memories are fragmented and he's missing his true name. And he's not the only one. An incomprehensible mystery and an inevitable war make him question what, exactly, he would do to become whole, and reclaim the music lost to him.

on FF.net/on AO3]

The silence was suffocating and consuming. The smell was everywhere—smoke and burnt hair and something dark and sinister—and despite his previous revulsion he was thankful for the cloak and the protection it offered his pounding heart. He drew the hood up over his eyes and walked through the gray sand, treading a winding path that was all too familiar. He was breathing harshly, his mind racing in a million directions, thinking of his friends, of what he had to do, what he had to say. If he were being honest with himself, he hadn't had enough practice bullshitting.

The darkness pressed in on him. He could feel the Heartless, watching, waiting, but remaining at bay. Possibly they recognized the cloak, and what it meant for their kind. He was grateful that he didn't have to run.

Ahead of him, he saw the dim lights of the Nobody city. He paused. He could run right now, run into the abyss, be gone forever, go to any world of his choosing.

No. He couldn't. There was no way this was all in vain. There had to be something he could still do while he was alive. Still, he had the deep gut feeling that he wasn't going back.

He pushed into the night sky. In the World that Never Was it was raining. Demyx tipped his head up to feel it. Drew strength from it.

Instantly he felt the air press around him. He saw nothing, but he guessed somebody—or something—was on patrol in the area. All of his senses were on high alert, tinged with a brink of panic. He wove through the streets at a pace slightly faster than normal. Anticipation flooded him.

The castle. The god damn castle. It stared down at him, massive and white and unyielding. Demyx felt more presences pressing into his consciousness, all of them sticky with darkness and Nobody blood. He approached the bottom stairs, shaking all over, but he hoped that the fear would be what the committee wanted him to present.

Someone was waiting in the doorway. Demyx recognized the fit of the cloak instantly and tried not to clench his fists.

"I was wondering when you'd bother to turn up," Braig said jovially. "You have a pretty good sense of timing. You know that?" His hood was pulled up, showing nothing but the gaping maw of the hood.

Demyx floundered. "…I do?" he asked.

"Yep. You do. Oh, come on, don't be scared. Don't give me that look. I just wanna talk. Isn't that why you're here?"

A seed of nausea tightened in his stomach. How had Braig known? "Well… yes…"

"That's not a good way to treat an old friend, is it?"

He took a deep breath. "Hello, Braig."

"Hello!" he said rather cheerfully.

"How've you been?"

"Oh, me? I'm peachy. Just peachy." He remained standing in the middle of the doorway, his hands on his hips. "You, on the other hand, have seen better days."

Demyx took a deep breath. "About that. You know what happened to me, don't you?"

There was silence on Braig's part for a beat longer than was natural.

"That's why I'm here," he continued in a low voice. "Look, I can help you. There are things I know about Sora and the Restoration Committee. If you can fix me, I'll… I'll tell you everything."

A low chuckle came from inside the hood. "You really haven't changed a bit, have you?"

The tone of his voice was meant to placate Demyx, but still he could feel something waiting to spring. "I guess not."

Braig took a step closer. He planted both hands on his shoulders and it took all of Demyx's strength not to flinch away or retaliate. He stared deep into his eyes from the blackness. Demyx could just see the outline of Braig's chin. Braig clucked his tongue and let him go.

"So what's your deal? Why'd you come back, after so long?"

He spoke cautiously. "Like I just said. I want to be healed. And I hate that they were using me."

Braid nodded studiously. "Using you how?"

"Using my power. Never giving me information about my condition, even though they had it. They wanted me to use my power against you, not just to gather intelligence, but in the fight. They never liked me, much, even in the old days. They only saved me because they felt they had to."

"But the committee took to you like glue, didn't they," he said calmly.

"Because I helped them through a drought. And I only did that because it saved me, too." He wondered if he was overdoing it. "…As it turns out, do a favor for them and they do one for you."

"Always an opportunist. What do you mean by that?" Braig asked.

He hesitated. He had Braig's interest, but he couldn't tell whether or not he really believed him, or if he really had any power to negotiate. "There was an attack plan on the vessels," he said. "And that's all I'll say until we come up with a deal."

Braig's laughter was genuine this time. "Okay, all right, fine. What do you say we play truth for truth? Here's my first question for you. How did you expect to get away with this?"

A finger of panic slithered down Demyx's spine. "What?" he asked blankly.

"Not a word of what you just said to me is true," Braig said in a clear voice. "You're lying through your teeth. You used to be so good at it." In a flash, he was behind Demyx and wrenched back both of his arms. "So good. You know, I almost believed you. The fear in your voice. That hurt look in your eye. But you forgot a few things. You idiot."

He fought against his constraints, fear coursing through him. He didn't know how to react.

"Zexion used to sew our cloaks once they got ripped up," he said calmly. "I'd recognize that handiwork anywhere. Why would they fix it for you unless they intended for you to use it?" He tightened his grip on Demyx's wrists, pressing it hard against his shoulder blade. "I could see your resolve in your eyes. No. You're not that weak or slimy anymore. Your life doesn't mean shit to you the way you are now."

His breath was coming raggedly now.

Braig laughed. "Come on! You have to admit it's funny."

Braig was holding him so tightly it hurt and he couldn't get any words out.

"This is rich. Rich! To think we wasted all that energy preparing you, only for you to try and double-cross us on their behalf. Yep! Charade's up! It was me! I did it! I broke you. And," he added, like an afterthought, "I'll break you again. Buh-bye." A needle pierced the skin of Demyx's neck. He fought the tranquilizer, but his powers couldn't neutralize whatever this was, and he collapsed in a heap in Braig's arms.

Dazzling, dazzling whiteness.

The room was huge. The domed ceiling was actually so high up he couldn't even see it properly. The floor was smooth shiny tile, and for a moment he saw his own terrified face as he tried to push himself up. He was still here. Still alive. Mostly.

A soft pop. Braig appeared at the other edge of the room, approaching slowly. His hood was down now, revealing his bared teeth, his white hair.

"Oh no! The scary old man!" he said loudly. He slipped out of sight, and Demyx turned around, searching for him desperately.

Another pop. "Right behind you," he said into Demyx's ear. Demyx whirled, trying to knee him in the crotch. Pop. "Sucks when your own plan backfires, doesn't it?" And Braig kicked him right in the groin, so hard he almost passed out. "You're supposed to wear a cup. Jackass. All that preparation, and they didn't tell you that much?"

Demyx struggled against the pain. There was something wrong in his body, worse than the pain. His ears were ringing. His powers were gagged, leaving a foggy smear of consciousness where it was supposed to be. His muscles were shaking.

He pulled hard against the fog, reaching for Arpeggio, reaching for something, but nothing came.

Pop. Braig approached him slowly, at a walk, and seized him by the hair. "You know I was rooting for you? I didn't mind you, the way the others did. You tried. You had an admirable will to live. So I figured, hey, I'll give the kid a bone. Rather than letting you be a stone floating through space—that's right, your world doesn't exist anymore, it's still gone, we needed it gone—I thought, I'll put him somewhere. Somewhere nice. Somewhere he's familiar with." He tugged harder and Demyx fought to break his iron grip. "I used you too. Boo-hoo. I knew you would fall in with that crowd if I broke you just a little."

"Why are you telling me this?" Demyx asked through gritted teeth. Part of him writhed for the answers.

"Because, face it, you're not going to be around much longer." Braig let go of his hair and kicked him solidly in the chest. Demyx felt a rib crack. "And I'm not a prick. You at least deserve the truth. Isn't that what this has been about? Not the guilt over your war crimes, not the love, not the friends you made along the way. The truth."

He choked for air and spat up blood.

"Yes. We were going to use you to get information on them," he said boredly. "That's obvious. Sometimes old man Xehanort is an obvious dude. So obvious you'd never be able to realize he was the one doing it in the first place. In fact, he wanted all of you. The whole set, to put up on a shelf. I said that's ridiculous. You can break them, make them a little bit uncomfortable. Let them help Sora, for all I care. Make the other side feel like it has some hope."

He let Demyx go and he fell hard onto the ground. "I haven't had to do this in a while, so forgive me if I'm rusty. Look. I'm rooting for you. If you answer my questions I might just let you go. You couldn't ever go back there. But you could go. How does that sound?"

He touched his right side, the aching rib. He couldn't catch his breath. "I don't know what I could tell you."

"I think you're a whole lot smarter than anyone gives you credit. Isn't that what this is about?" He knelt by Demyx. "Was the committee really trying to attack the vessels?"

Demyx didn't speak. He should have anticipated that somebody would have figured it out in the end. "Yes," he said.

Braig stood up and turned his back. Demyx struggled to sit up.

"Do you know how we used to turn higher Nobodies into Dusks?" he asked finally.

Demyx blinked. The brightness of this room was stabbing his eyes.

"It wasn't just an empty threat. It's possible."

"But I'm human," Demyx said.

"With your heart the way it is? Who knows how you'll react," Braig said. He took something out of his pocket. It was an average, ordinary medical syringe, still in the wrapping. And a vial of grayish liquid. Demyx tried to back away from him, but the pain in his ribs and between his legs hampered him, and Braig quickly teleported over. He opened the syringe and let the wrappings fall to the shiny floor.

Demyx noticed for the first time that there was a drain in the center of the room. A hot flush broke out across his body. He pushed harder against whatever was gagging his powers, only to have blackness temporarily wash over him.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," Braig said. "That stuff's not exactly good for your nervous system."

He must've been right; Demyx's fingers and toes were feeling numb, but that could have easily been the animal panic sweeping over his mind.

Braig jabbed the needle into the vial and filled it partway. Very calmly, he tapped out the air. "A milliliter won't do much other than cause you pain. But more than that? Who knows." Braig grabbed his arm. He thrashed, trying to pull away. Braig yanked up his sleeve. Demyx went, inexplicably, limp, and it took him a moment to figure out that Braig was manipulating the space around him. He felt the needle go in. A coldness ran through his body as Braig's powers held him down.

The serum scraped like razors across his nerve endings, erupting in a pain he could barely conceive.

"It's not magic, that gets them in the end," Braig said calmly. "It's the pain. Breaks down the will to live, all those higher concepts of self. After that, well, the rest is easy. You shape 'em the way you want 'em, like clay." His face was too close to Demyx's. "Was the committee planning to attack the vessels?"

One word. He just had to say one word. He wasn't sure what would come out of his mouth if he managed to unclench his jaw.

"Take your time," Braig said. "That stuff takes forever to get out of your system."

He couldn't breathe. He wished he would pass out; it would make this end all the sooner. But his body kept drawing breaths. His vision had a strangely sheeny quality and the taste of copper filled his mouth. He just had to say yes. Yes. "…No," he said. He was trembling all over.

"Now that wasn't so hard," Braig said. He pushed a lock of hair out of Demyx's eyes. "All that stuff in your bloodstream now? Makes it pretty damn impossible to lie. You can try all you want. I wouldn't recommend it, though." He paused. "You should have just run. Nobody would have judged you. The only thing you used to be good at was keeping yourself alive, and now you can't even do that."

He choked for air. He was too shocked to cry, or to do anything other than tense up and shut down right there. Luxord's Somebody had been right.

#nocturnal memory #demyx #kingdom hearts #kingdom hearts 3d #fanfiction #braig #sorry for being late this week #i worked 11 hours yesterday and was too tired to post when i got home #next chapter will be the last one #i had sooo much fun writing Braig though holy shit #i might have to do more in the future with him/Xigbar

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