#I'd say the rest of the world disappears but

[dreamedfyre-a]

not to be morbid on main but i saw this art and honestly that and the one f&b art where she's running towards jaehaerys' body while b&c leave always makes me think of the horrible violence and its aftermath, the grief and loss, the trauma and shock, a mother unwilling to let her son's mutilated body go, his blood on her hands, her dress, her hair (it doesn't matter; nothing matters but the fact there is no life in him anymore). she holds on to bloodied clothes even after. she haunts the room where the stones are stained with her child's blood. more self flagellation than remembrance, because it hurts and she wants to hurt, because she doesn't think she deserves to stop hurting. it's her blood on the stones, on the clothes she won't let go of. the life she birthed, the horror she let happen, it's all hers and she won't let go of it. it's repulsive and frightening and horrible and her fault in so many ways. she can't let go.

[emmyrosee]

The “would you kiss me for $10 or the prettiest girl on the world for $1000?” trend with modern au bf sukuna 👀👀

dummy 🙄 sukuna???

SENT If you send me some fuck shit, hand to god

dummy 🙄 would you kiss me for $10

or kiss the prettiest girl ever for $1000???

SENT Depends on who the competition is

There's three dots that indicate you're typing, then they disappear. They reappear, and he chuckles as he imagines you, fighting for the words to come to your mind as he effortlessly, works your buttons. The dots disappear again, and this time, they stay gone. He quirks a brow at the lack of angry texts from you, only to then groan at the idea that this time, he's taken it too far, his jokes have gotten him nowhere, and he takes a deep breath in to keep himself cool in the dairy aisle at the convenience store.

SENT It was a joke, brat

I'd never want to kiss anyone else

Not when I get to kiss you for free, any time I want, you know that, right?

You merely put your phone on Do Not Disturb. He takes another deep breath in as he digs himself deeper into the hole of your wrath, and he quickly makes his way to the snack aisle, grabbing your favorite chips and heading straight for the candy aisle for an extra boost. By the time he's done, it looks like he's throwing a damn birthday party, but he can't bring himself to care. Not when you're at home, pouting over him.

By the time he gets home, you still haven't answered him. He braces himself for your silence as he unlocks the door and nudges it open with his knee. To his surprise, you're in the kitchen making tea, but there's a blanket covering your body with only your face peeking out.

"You look comfy," he hums, and you sneak a hand out of your cocoon to grab your mug of tea.

"Well since I'm so hideous and disgusting that even my own boyfriend doesn't want to kiss me, I've decided to become a recluse," you hiss, making your way back down the hall. "Don't follow me."

"You know I'm going to follow you," he scoffs, instantly following you down the hall into your shared bedroom. There's a blue light cascading over the walls from the tv, and the curtains are drawn shut. You put the tea on your side table and scuttle back into bed. He rolls his eyes and walks his way on your side of the bed. "Let me kiss you."

"Let me give you $10."

"I'm not taking $10-"

"Well someone has to," you snap. "At least, until you find someone just soooo much prettier than me, then you get even more money to kiss me with. Doesn't that sound like a good plan?"

"Babe, it was a joke-"

"And I'm not laughing."

He snarls his lip slightly before scooping his arms under you, hauling you up and onto his lap and ignoring your shoves and batting of hands. He wastes no time is pressing wet kisses to your cheeks and neck, relishing in how your body shakes trying to hold in your laughter.

“Don’t you ever-“ he kisses your temple firmly. “Deprive me-“ kissing your jawline. “Of your kisses.” His lips press to the corner of your mouth, and the hand not cradling your body comes up to grip your chin to hold you steady. “Brat.”

“Don’t tell me I’m not pretty then!” You whine.

“Of course you’re pretty,” he scoffs, pressing another kiss to your face. “I never said that. I would never say that. You’re the fucking prettiest. You’re mine. Of course you’re the prettiest.”

You go quiet, and he thinks you’re about to get mad at him again; however, you turn to rest your head on his shoulder, pressing a tiny kiss to his neck.

“Say more stuff like that,” you murmur.

He smirks, “there is no girl prettier than you. Trust me.” He turns his head to kiss your other cheek, squishing you slightly in the process. “Ive seen it all, baby. You’re the one. And even if someone tries to give me money to kiss you, I don’t fucking want it-“ he kisses you again. “Because I get to do it for free. And that shit’s priceless.”

“Softie,” you snort. He groans and turns his head to bite your cheek firmly, but his heart speeds up at the way you kick your feet out and flail them in protest. “Oww! I’m sorry, don’t bite!”

“I’m not a child nor a dog, woman,” he grumbles, but he does release your cheek and press a kiss to your brow bone in compensation. “No matter how you see me, anyways.”

“My feral little doggy,” you prod.

He yaks, but can’t help the smirk that curls on his cheeks from your laughter.

[oraclemoontarot]

a letter from your future spouse 𓂃⊹ pac tarot reading

from left to right, top to bottom -> pile 1, pile 2, pile 3, pile 4

paid readings

•┈┈┈••✦ ♡ ✦••┈┈┈•

pile 1 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ

cards pulled: ace of cups, seven of cups, ace of pentacles, sun + queen of cups

Hi, my darling,

There are many things I'd want to say to you, to write to you. My heart fills even by the thought of you alone, and a warmth like that of bathing under the sun rushes to me when I look to the day we'd meet. There is something enamouring about you, your energy, your kindness, your sensitivity. You could never judge, hurt, belittle, or shun others, and that is what I truly, and genuinely, love about you.

You coming into my life was the greatest gift I could have ever received and sometimes I wonder if I am worthy of such an amazing person to have the privilege in being able to call mine. You have brought so much love and light into my life, that at first was overwhelming, it was like nothing I'd ever experienced, you give me so much joy and I want to be able to give you the world in return, and I laugh to myself at that thought as even the world would not be enough to express my gratitude.

When I think about the future, about us crossing paths, I can't help but think about the present too. About the many paths that intertwine before me - dreams, hopes, and fantasies - yet the feeling that consumes me, is that no matter what I pick, I know it will eventually lead to you. And each one of those paths would promise us a stable, comfortable, and abundant life.

But, my darling, if there is one thing I could tell you right now, it is not to worry. Please, take care of yourself, just like the love you have and will give me, let yourself feel it too. You are someone rare in this world, someone anyone would wish to come across at least once in their lives, and I hope by the time we meet, you will be the happiest you can be.

With love,

Your future spouse

pile 2 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ

cards pulled: four of swords, knight of pentacles, moon, queen of pentacles + king of cups

My dear sweetheart,

Whenever the world grows quiet around me, when things get difficult and I retreat back into my shell, I think of you. I think about the calmness you provide for me, the support and the reassurance. I also think about the stability you provide and the walls that surround me, our home.

I know I move slow, my approach is one of caution, and sometimes that may lead to frustration and even impatience, but I want you to know that no matter what happens, I will forever be dedicated to you, our marriage, and our family. Just as you have brought me warmth and safety, I wish to be your pillar, to be by your side and give you that security, to remove all the burdens that rest on your shoulders.

There may be moments when we may misunderstand one another, I may retreat sometimes into my shell, but I know that together, we will be able to achieve a lot; to strengthen our relationship.

You are someone so beautiful, your heart is strong yet just as loving. I am intrigued by the way in which you see the world, and how you face any problem with a smile. My respect and love for you cannot be put into words alone, but you are someone I want to change for, you are someone I want to be better for.

For you, I will mature and grow, I will pour my heart into our marriage, and I will fight for us if there ever comes a time. My heart yearns for you, and yet somehow, I feel the words just can't come out. You are someone I truly respect and adore and I will fight my stubbornness to make all those uncertainties disappear, just as you have given me the world, your heart, and your support. I will return those and more and I cannot wait for the day we meet, my dearest.

With love,

Your future spouse

pile 3 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ

cards pulled: world, nine of wands, page of pentacles, magician + king of pentacles

My dearest,

You are my world. My everything. As cheesy as this may be, like a puzzle piece, you complete me. It is like I have finally found true happiness, and I can't help but to smile at the thought of you coming into my life, at my world filling up perfectly with your space. My heart yearns for you in a way that is excited and pleasant.

Within our marriage, any difficulty or challenge that presents itself on our path would be easily faced. Together, we can accomplish anything, we can get over any hurdle, and we come out stronger and having learnt a whole lot. Such challenges I could never face on my own, I am suddenly able to face with you.

You have taught me so much, you are someone who embodies knowledge, you are my inspiration and my ever-growing motivation. Our future holds so many possibilities and I can't wait to experience them with you together. The both of us will grow into the best versions of ourselves within this marriage. We will create our home, our life, our business, but we will also manifest our dreams into reality, together. What most would have deemed impossible, is possible with you.

For you, my dearest, I will be stable, humble, and a strong partner in our marriage. I would not want you to face any burden alone, I would not want you to suffer, to hurt, to experience anything that may trouble your heart or your mind. Together, we will flourish, we will create a stable home and an abundant career and lifestyle.

I look forward to the day we meet,

Your future spouse

pile 4 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ

cards pulled: five of cups, three of cups, six of pentacles, ten of cups + judgement

My sweetheart,

I have faced a lot of hurt in my life, at least up until I met you, I have lost and failed, but you helped me to see the good that surrounds me. To appreciate the hurt, the heartbreaks, and the loss, for teaching me and making me into the person that I am now. With you, you allow me the opportunity to experience fun, to make meaningful connections, and to open my heart.

I am so, so incredibly grateful to you, for your generosity, and for the time you put into our relationship. You have such a kind and giving heart, it inspires me. It warms me and teaches me how to love again.

Within our marriage, we are equal, we both provide for one another and make our house our home, together. There is so much love and light when you are around, so much energy and emotion.

With you, you make me feel... content. Like this is what life is really about. This is what a true, healthy and loving relationship is meant to be, and you have given me that. To me, you are my destiny, it is as though we are soulmates and that we were meant to find one another.

I have learnt so much from you, you have taught me many things about life and my self. You are my true happiness. You are what keeps me going and I long for the day we meet.

With all my heart, I love you,

Your future spouse

[dolicekiss]

Hello there,

If you are still taking in requests, I thought I'd just leave this here. Could you potentially do a Hannibal Lecter x reader one-shot/headcanons (it's up to you) where they used to be lovers. But when the reader caught wind of Hannibal not exactly being a normal, she practically dissappeared from his life entirely. Now, years later, he sees the reader in Baltimore at an art gallery or something (idk maybe the reader is an artist herself or just a guest?) And it just re-sparks some sort of deep longing (yandere vibes???) within Hannibal.

Just a thought.

♡: i love this idea, its fr gonna awaken the poet in me. i hope u like it and it was up to your expectations (fear of disappointing ppl goes hard)

An ache for art

YANDERE HANNIBAL HEADCANON

PAIRING: Yandere!Hannibal x Artist!Reader

CONTENT WARNING: Yandere hannibal, mentions of kidnapping, forced (?) kissing, persistant hannibal, not much, only obsessed hannibal who wants his woman back

SYNOPSIS: When you abandoned Hannibal Lecter, he searched for answers everywhere in his desperation for you. Oblivious to the fact that you'd caught onto the abnormalities of the man. Years later at an art gallery, Hannibal finds solace in the painings presented before you and when he finds out you're the creator, a spark is once again lightened.

An art gallery in Baltimore was the last destination of all places in the world where Hannibal expected to find you.

When he'd asked to see the artist that had performed such a spectacular job at capturing human longing — akin to his, under the stroke of a brush, he didn't expect it to be you.

And you surely didn't expect to meet him. Yet here you were, nervousness heaving on you like cemented blocks.

You'd abandoned him under the fear that you might become his next victim. A voice inside you prevented you from informing the authorities but your morals could not allow you to stay with a man like him.

Especially after realizing he must've fed you human remains, on one of his special dinner nights. Torn between your love for him and the need to escape, you never looked back.

Hannibal tried searching for you, everywhere. He thought you two were soulmates, meant to be forever. You'd climbed the walls that he had always kept higher and higher.

Just why did you leave then? Had he done something so severe that you had to disappear from his life? Leaving your job behind, your life behind in Florence and never appearing in front of him ever again.

“Hannibal.” Your voice a whisper. He could taste the way his name unfurled on your tongue.

For a man that in complete control of his emotions and what he felt, he couldn't contain his excitement and happiness upon at the sight of you.

Hannibal stepped closer to you, a smile causing the wrinkles to appear. The same wrinkles you once used to adore.

“Beautiful art, I must say.”

You nodded, accepting his compliment, a small smile on your lips. You felt no discomfort or resentment in his presence. Only thing left were the beautiful memories of a healthy relationship.

The rest of the evening was spent together. You showed him around the gallery, explaining subtle details of your art to him albeit that wasn't necessary as Hannibal read right through your gentle brush strokes.

Though he was more interested in the art that strolled alongside him. A beautiful sight in her glory, flourishing once more like the petals of a sunflower.

Hannibal had an ache. An ache to consume art but you were the type of art he felt full just by catching sight of. He couldn't satiate these cravings you'd left him with.

After your departure, Hannibal killed and he killed. Yet no one could even compare to what you made him feel.

You were responsible for the deaths of multiple innocents, because you chose to leave him with an ache. Hannibal wondered how you'd feel if you were to find out.

He wished for the time to stop. That everything would come to a halt and you'd stay frozen right before his gaze.

Nowhere to go, nowhere to run to. Only available to him, only before his very eyes.

If it came down to it, Hannibal would not shy away from denying you of your freedom.

As you both reached a secluded corner in the gallery, the tension like a pendulum hung in the air above your heads.

Unanswered questions probed at Hannibal from within. He needed to know why you'd left — just what had scared you away to the point of no return?

Somewhere he knew. Deep in his heart, he was aware that this abrupt abandonment had everything to do with his own sickly desires.

“Why?”

You knew it was coming and it did. You couldn't tell him you knew about his little murder sprees or how he fed you human flesh.

You tried to walk away from the suffocating conversation but Hannibal couldn't allow that. Hand grasping around your arm, his tight prevention scaring you.

“Hannib—”

“I won't let you leave this time.” He longed for you, he never stopped to begin with. Everyday he'd come to his house and find it empty, it felt like needles prickled his chest.

He missed you roaming the premises of his humble abode, dressed in one of his button downs. Casting a meaningful light over the painted walls and furniture.

His grip was tight. You saw the sheer determination so instead of causing a scene, it was best to continue the conversation someplace better.

Like a coffee shop.

Sitting before him with a cup of coffee in your hand, you stared at him. Hannibal was never fond of such small cafes on the roadside — he preferred lavish and rich restaurants.

“I know, Hannibal.”

That was all he needed to know that you were well aware. His face falling but there was no expression on his face at all. Like he'd expected this.

“Was it that easy to abandon me?”

A stinging sensation spread in your chest at his sorrow filled question. Of course it wasn't easy. You'd spent a whole year in complete isolation after parting from him.

Hannibal caught onto the painful expression, akin to his. He wished that he was different too, more like you and not the cannibalistic murderer he was.

But some instincts could not be controlled.

“Come back to me.”

You could not. To step all over your moral conscience required strong will which you did not possess.

“I can't. It will never work, Hannibal.”

Hannibal noticed the reluctance in your gaze, his own darkening. Plans to keep you by his side already forming in his cunning mind.

There was no limit he wouldn't cross for you. Whether it was manipulating you back into his life or kidnapping you, he didn't want to back out.

You picked up your bag and after sparing him one last glance, left the cafe. Bells ringing against his ears, notifying him of your exit.

Hannibal was in disarray. He needed to have you, he had to have you. There was no way he could sit idle and watch you leave him.

So he followed you, pressing you up against your car. Lips working hastily to captivate yours, as he fought the string of dark emotions inside him.

You almost melted.

Him being the only man that could make you feel like this. A bittersweet kiss which acted as the closure you never received from him.

Hannibal’s frame locked you in, his hands roaming down to your waist. He kissed you with vigor, with profound strength like you could disappear at any given moment.

Your hands stayed by your sides, lacking the courage to slither them across his nape.

The kiss heated – his lips sucking yours and then he attempted to enter your mouth. You didn't let him. Persistent you were.

Hannibal pulled back from the kiss and breathed against your lips.

You soon realized what you were doing, in who you were investing and you pushed him off you.

Hannibal loved the feeling of your small hands over his chest. The way you still tasted the same even after years had passed.

“Don't ever come in front of me again.”

He didn't like the venom in your tone and he sure as hell wasn't going to let you go like before.

Hannibal watched you leave in your car and sighed, his fingertips running along his own lips. Remnants of your saliva bringing him to the brink of insanity.

He would do anything to have you.

And if that meant going against your will, so be it.

[dirtytomatoedwrites]

HIS GIRL - PART 2

Summary: You were always Topper’s girl—until Rafe decided you were no longer his.

PART 1 can be read here

Paring: Rafe Cameron x Fem!Reader

Strictly 18+ No Minors to Interact

Warnings: Dark!Rafe, Rafe/Reader, Topper/Reader, Dub-Con/Non-Con, Coercive Behaviour, Fingering, Oral (w receiving) Drinking, Graphic Scenes / Smut.  

Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Please don’t steal or copy bits of my writing or any writing from other writers cause karma will get ya.

The night air is cool against your skin, a sharp contrast to the heat of the house, and you shiver slightly, not noticing Rafe's hand resting against the small of your back. The beach stretches out ahead, dark and quiet, the waves whispering secrets in the distance.

You’re tipsy, your laughter loose and soft, and he likes the sound of it, the way it fills the dark spaces between his thoughts. He guides you along, each step closer to where he wants you, each step carefully calculated.

“I never figured you for the ‘walk on the beach’ type of guy,” you tease, a playful smile tugging at your lips.

“Oh, yeah? Why’s that?” Rafe raises a brow, glancing sideways at you.

“I dunno…” You laugh lightly, your voice soft and carefree. “You’re just so… serious all the time.” The words spill out easily, weightless from the alcohol. You’re too distracted, too lost in the rhythm of the waves, to notice how far you’ve wandered from the house—how isolated the two of you have become.

“Serious, huh?” He lets out a soft chuckle, though there’s an edge to it. “Is that how you see me?”

You nod without a second thought, swaying as you walk, oblivious to the way his eyes trace every curve of your body, his lips parting slightly as if savoring the thought. You don’t notice. You never do.

“Topper says I should set you up with one of my friends…”

Rafe's jaw tenses. “Does he now?"

"He just means—well, you know—he thinks you need someone who could get you to loosen up, smile more—”

"Someone like you?” The words leave his mouth before he can stop them.

You laugh, stumbling slightly. “I don’t know about that. I have my off days like everyone else. But Topper just wants you to be happy. You know, to have what we have—”

“Riiight,” Rafe drawls, stretching the word, his eyes narrowing as he processes.

Happy. And yet here you are. Alone with him. Laughing, trusting him. Maybe that’s what truly pushed him over the edge. To prove Topper wrong, to show him that the girl who supposedly "makes him happy" can be taken with a mere glance, a touch, a few choice words.

And now, because of Topper's self-righteous superiority Rafe wasn't going to stop until he turned his world completely upside down.

“But you know… maybe I don’t need to set you up after all,” you tease, still unaware, your smile soft and innocent. “I mean, here we are, walking on the beach. I guess you do have a soft side after all. Any girl would be lucky to—”

“Careful,” Rafe cuts in, his arm tightening around you as you stumble again. His hand hovers just above your hip, fingers itching to move lower, to grab a handful of your ass through that little summer dress. But he won’t. Not yet. He can wait a little longer.

"God, that would be so embarrassing, knowing my luck I'd faceplant in the sand," you laugh, your head resting briefly against his shoulder. Rafe inhales, taking in the scent of your hair, his eyes rolling back for a second. Fuck, you smell good. You probably taste better.

“Where… where are we going?” you ask suddenly, your words slurring now, the alcohol making your legs unsteady.

“Just down here,” he says smoothly, his voice dipping low, calm, soothing. Like he’s been here before. Like he’s done this a hundred times. He leads you across the sand, his feet sinking slightly with every step, but he doesn’t waver, doesn’t falter.

The pier looms ahead, dark and skeletal against the night sky. Its wooden beams stretch out over the water, a perfect place to disappear, to be alone. The shadows underneath are thick, the sound of the waves crashing against the posts is a constant rhythm—drowning out everything else.

You hesitate, your steps slowing, a flicker of uncertainty crossing your face. “Maybe we—maybe we should head back…” you whisper, your voice a little shaky now.

“Come on,” Rafe coaxes softly, his voice a smooth, dangerous whisper. “Don’t be like that. Have you ever been to the pier at night?" he asks, and you shake your head 'no.'

“Well, you’re gonna like it. Trust me.”

He guides you under the pier, into the darkness where the world seems to fade away. The crashing waves create a steady, rhythmic beat that syncs with the pounding in his chest. Any second now. Any second now.

“Here,” Rafe says, finally stopping near one of the weathered wooden posts staked in dry sand. His hand grips your waist firmly as he gently leans you back against it. The rough wood scrapes against your skin, but you barely notice, too absorbed in the sudden shift in atmosphere.

“We can chill here for a bit. Just you and me.” His words are spoken with a menacing calm as he looms over you. His hand remains firmly on your waist, fingers pressing in just enough to make it clear he’s not letting go. He’s not going anywhere.

His eyes lock onto yours, and he sees it— eyes wide with confusion, the sudden fear mingling with it. It only fuels him more. Fuck, he loves the way your body tenses, the way your breath catches in your throat, that delicious mix of fear and innocence that makes him want to devour you whole.

“What… what are you doing, Rafe—” Your whisper, barely cutting through the relentless crash of the waves. It’s a question he has no intention of answering.

He’s on you in a heartbeat, lips crashing against yours with full force. Demanding rather than pleading, and he revels in the surge of power as he claims your mouth. His tongue darts past your lips, exploring with a possessive hunger, licking and sucking. Utterly Relentless. Ravenous.

He feels your hands pressing weakly against his chest, your fingers trembling in a futile attempt to push him away. It’s almost comical, the lack of resistance you offer. Your touch is barely there, too weak from the alcohol.

“Rafe, no,” you moan as he kisses down your neck and buries his face in your chest inhaling your scent. His hands sliding all over you grabbing  and squeezing, making up for all those months, all those month of pinning and watching and fantasying.

"Rafe—stop—" Your voice is so small, so unsure and hollow, and he fucking loves it. Those tiny, breathless moans, those fleeting flickers of desire in your words even as you say no—it’s all he needs. It’s the crack he’s been waiting for, the opening that lets him slide in just a little deeper, into your mind, under your skin.

“Don’t move,” he says, his voice low and deadly. A promise. A threat, even as he holds your face and kisses you again, his tongue lashing hungrily against yours.

“Do you hear me? Huh? Don’t you dare fucking move,” he whispers against your lips, just as he gets down on his knees in front of you.

Naturally, you thrash, trying to push him away. But you’re no match for him, not in your inebriated state. He shoves your back against the post, hard enough to stun you. Hard enough to make you freeze, stock still and shaking.

His hands push up your flimsy dress, desperate to touch and taste what's underneath and he groans when he comes face to face with your pink panties.

His fingers curl around the fabric, pulling them aside at first, exposing you to the cool night air and his ravenous gaze. Your plump pussy lips press against the taut fabric just begging to be kissed. Without hesitation, he leans in, his tongue on you with ruthless hunger.

He groans at your taste—so fucking sweet, of course you're fucking sweet, just like everything else about you—but the fabric of your underwear is in the way and it's pissing him off. He doesn’t have time to fuck around. He knows Topper is probably looking for you, asking where you've gone and who you’re with. In one sharp motion, he yanks them down, guiding your legs out of them and shoving the damp fabric into his pocket.

His hand immediately hooks around one of your thighs and throws it over his shoulder as he yanks you closer. His tongue plunging inside you with brutal force, the shock of it leaving you gasping.

Rafe watches you closely, sees the way your body tenses, the sharp breath you suck in, the fear that flashes in your eyes. It makes his heart race, adrenaline spiking as he grips you harder, forcing you to stay exactly where he wants you while his mouth gorges on your sweet pussy.

His fingers dig into the globes of your ass, squeezing hard as he works you over, tongue fucking you like a man possessed. There’s no tenderness here, no hesitation—just raw, invasive, primal need. He pushes and pulls you as if he owns you, every thrust of his tongue deep in your cunt, every lick of your clit is a reminder that there’s no escape. Not now. Not when he’s so fucking close to breaking you.

Suddenly, he replaces his tongue with two thick fingers, driving them deep into you with brutal precision, curling them just in time to see your eyes rolling back, tears kissing your cheeks as a silent scream rips from your throat.

“Don't fight it- Just let it out—Let it all out… no one's gonna hear you... It’s just you and me... just you and me...”

He can feel the heat building inside you, the way your breath comes in ragged gasps, your body betraying you as he takes what he wants, what he knows he deserves. He buries his face again, gluttonous, head thrashing from side to side like a dog with its favorite toy—determined to break you.

"No Rafe- no, please-- don't make me-- don't make me--" you whine.  Your hands clutch at his head, fingers scratching his scalp, trying desperately to push him off, but it only makes him double down, dragging you over the edge.

“Oh God— Oh no, please-- oh no, no, no no no no ---” you gasp as your body bucks against him, but he holds you firm, and when you scream, when you finally  scream the sound is ripped from the depths of you, piercing over the waves.

Rafe knows it’s not from relief—but fucking devastation when you cum, and he loves it. Loves the way you desperately gasp for air, loves the way your body crumples, the way you can barely stay upright, how he’s the source of both your pleasure and despair.

He clings to you, groaning at the feel of your pussy throbbing against his tongue, the soft squelch of your clit pressed against his nose. You’re cumming so fucking hard that your sweet nectar overflows, running down his chin as if he’s savoring the juiciest of fruits. He greedily follows your every movement, keeping pace with your squirming, taking every last drop, leaving nothing to waste as your sobs of pleasure and anguish drift into the night sky.

His eyes flick up to you, and he could have cum right then and there. You were grinding your delicious pussy against his face, eyes rolled back and mouth open. No longer pushing him away, your fingers held onto the back of his head, pulling him closer, guiding him exactly where you needed him, while tears trailed down your cheeks.

You looked like you’d seen the face of God—reverent, awe-inspired. It was such a beautiful sight that a part of him wished Topper were there to see.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

PART 3 / STORY MASTERLIST

A/N: If liking the story so far feel free to spread the love by liking/commenting/reblogging.. Lots of love to you all ❤️

[thenyoumightaswellwrestleangels]

You said you'd stay with us (you swore you'd still be you)

absinthe makes the heart grow fonder - series masterlist here

pairing: poly marauders x reader (gender neutral)

length: 1.5k

genre: rockstar au !! fluff, hurt/comfort

warnings: drummer reader, some real 'where does the performance end and you begin' vibes, reader smokes, it's inferred that they're also drinking, y'all will have to pry bestie peter from my cold dead hands

a/n: oh uuuuuh more pining more yearning more I'm in love with you but I'm too afraid to make it real. like what if you were all in a band and you were all in love and you were all too scared of fucking it all up to say anything

"You're looking awful glum tonight," James points out as he leans against the railing of the balcony you're on. He doesn't reprimand you for sitting on the railing, but he does frown as he glances down to where the ground is, inching closer to you to place a firm hand on your thigh.

"I called the car around - I'm going back to the hotel. You can let the others know if they notice," you respond in a sigh, the smoke leaving your lungs on the exhale as you bring your cigarette to your lips for another drag.

"…Are you sober right now, love?" James asks, eyeing you carefully. You look at him bemusedly.

"You think I came to a party after our show and… didn't have a single drink?"

"Well…" he says carefully. You narrow your eyes and James grips your thigh a little tighter - a plead for you to hear him out. "You weren't exactly the life of the party tonight, lovely. You disappeared pretty quick. If you have been drinking, that means you've been doing it out here - alone, sitting very precariously on a very high balcony, with no one looking out for you." You've stopped looking at him, keeping your eyes trained on the expansive driveway out front of whoever's house this is. When you see your car pull up, you put out your cigarette easily on the railing before sliding off of it, letting James keep a hand firmly on you, sliding from your thigh up to your waist.

"I don't need a babysitter, James," you say bluntly, but you can't help but soften a bit at the wide, sad eyes he gives you, his bottom lip jutting out slightly. You wonder idly if he realizes he looks at you so often like he's a puppy you've just kicked. "I'll see you tomorrow for rehearsals," you offer gently before you slip away.

In the safety of the backseat of your car, tinted windows blocking out the gaze of the outside world, you let your head lean back against the seat, sighing and closing your eyes as you rub at your temples. The relief is short-lived, however, as the car door is pulled open and James slides into the seat next to you, grinning despite the glare you sent him.

"Didn't really think I'd let you go sit at the hotel sulking all night, did you?" He quips. You bristle.

"I don't sulk," you huff. His smile widens as the car pulls away.

"Sure you don't, sweetheart." He throws an arm around your shoulders and you let him, sighing as you lean against him, resting your head against his chest. "You wanna tell me what's going on?" He asks gently.

"Nothing," is your quick reply. He hums thoughtfully, running a hand through your hair gently.

"Wanna try again?" He's still gentle, a patience seeping from him into you that lulls you as you relax further against him.

"It's just a lot sometimes. I'm tired is all," you admit. James presses a kiss to the crown of your head and your heart does something funny in your chest.

"You're allowed to take a break every now and then, love," he offers. You tense.

"I don't need -"

"No, but you still can," he placates, smoothing his hand over the back of your head as he silently coaxes you into relaxing once more. "I know you don't need to. God knows you'll run on fumes forever and never say a thing about it. But you don't need to - not here, not with us."

James, in all his mother-hen nature, continues to reprimand you in that gentle, caring way of his all the way up to your hotel room, only stopping when you shut yourself in the bathroom and turn the tap on so that you can't hear him. By the time you come out in clothes that are decidedly much more comfortable than what you'd been wearing at the party, he's lounging in your bed and flipping idly through TV channels.

"Oh, sure, make yourself at home," you quip as you flop onto the bed next to him, leaning against the headboard. James grins in that beaming way that he's so fond of, turning the TV volume down to a low, background hum.

"Thanks, love." You scoff at his words.

"Are you planning on staying here all night?" You ask wearily. He pretends to think about it.

"What will you do if I leave?" You shrug, sliding further down in bed and crossing your arms. James opens his mouth to speak and you know he's going to say something about you sulking, so you make a point to wack him with a pillow before he can. He laughs good-naturedly about it, though, so you're not so sure what you've accomplished.

Fortunately, or rather unfortunately, you don't have time to ponder it further before your hotel room door is swinging open and Sirius is flouncing into the room, Remus trailing in after him. You sigh and look at Remus imploringly, but he only shrugs, leaning towards you to squeeze your shoulder in what you're sure is supposed to be comforting before he settles in the armchair next to the bed. Sirius, on the other hand, takes to flopping directly across the bottom of the bed, landing on James's legs and causing some sort of friendly tussle between the two of them.

"This is actually my hotel room, you know," you point out dryly. "How did you even get in here?"

"You gave Peter your spare key," Remus points out.

"Peter doesn't come in unannounced," you shoot back. Sirius and James stop whatever roughhousing they're caught up in so that Sirius can lean over and press a sweaty kiss to your cheek. You click your tongue in annoyance and hope it hides the way your heart flips.

"Cheer up, doll," Sirius says, unperturbed by your scowl. "What were you playing at, anyway? Leaving without telling any of us and thinking we wouldn't notice? Like we wouldn't miss our favourite drummer." You shoot James a look that says you shouldn't have told them and he smiles disarmingly.

"Just because I'm staying in tonight doesn't mean you all have to - and I'm your only drummer, Sirius, in case you've forgotten," you say icily. Sirius smiles, but it's more honest than you're used to, and he reaches across James to smooth a thumb over your cheek quickly before pulling back.

"Could never forget you, love. Not even if I tried." You stare at him, his tone heavier than normal, as Remus shifts and clears his throat.

"Anyway, dove… we just want to make sure you're alright, yea?" He says, and you exhale a breath you didn't know you were holding as the tension dissipates. 

"Everything's fine," you say stubbornly. "I just didn't really feel like being there tonight."

"Well, we can see that," James chimes in. "But you always go to these things. You -"

"I know, I know, ok? I won't - it won't happen like that again, all right?" You huff. "I won't leave like that."

"No, see, I'm not sure you're understanding what Jamie's saying, love," Sirius says, the softness in his voice making your heart drop. It takes a lot for Sirius to be gentle, and he only does it when he thinks he really needs it. "What we're saying is that you don't have to. Pete never goes to the parties - we haven't kicked him out of the band yet, have we?"

"But that's different," you sigh, sitting up straighter. "Pete and I… are different kinds of performers. You know that." Remus leans forward in his chair to put a hand on your knee and you will yourself not to flinch at the contact, not to shy away from the kindness in his eyes that you know he reserves for the people he really loves.

"You don't have to perform here, love," Remus says gently. "You don't have to do that. Not here, not when it's just us." Your bottom lip trembles and you bunch the covers of the bed in your hands.

"Sometimes I think, for you lot, this life is fun… and for me, it's still work. I just can't make myself see it the way you guys do."

"But that's what we're here for," James offers, his voice kind. "Let us help you out. We decided to do this together for a reason, right? You decided to stick with us for a reason."

"I… I did, yea," you say.

"Yea," Sirius repeats. "So let us be here, alright?" Remus rubs his thumb across your knee as the other two look at you expectantly. You smile, a terse, small sort of thing - but it works nonetheless.

"Alright," you sigh. "Together, then."

[woso-dreamzzz]

Ma'am II

Aitana Bonmatí x Royal!Reader

Summary: The plane ride

You sipped your champagne as you relaxed back in your seat.

Your bodyguard sat at the very front of the plane, nearest the cockpit to give some semblance of privacy. Of course, the idea of true privacy on a plane was laughable but it was as close as you could get and you were thankful for that.

"Are you still looking at the shower?" You called out, your head angling towards the back of the plane," It's just a shower."

"On a plane!" Aitana said as she peaks out of the back compartment," An ensuite bathroom on a plane! You've got a bed!"

"Where else are we supposed to sleep?"

"It's only a few hours," Aitana said as she took her seat next to you," Why would we need to sleep?"

"A nap never hurt anyone," You replied," Besides, we still need to request permission to land and such. Some airports don't like when we give them too short a notice."

"You're royalty," Aitana insisted," They're probably jumping over themselves to get you to land with them. They're probably thinking you're going to tip."

She laughed but it petered off when she realised you weren't laughing with her.

"No, seriously? You tip just to land?"

You shrugged. "Tipping never hurt anyone." You stood and stretched. "Greece still sound good to you?"

"We've been in the air for nearly half an hour! What do you mean does 'Greece still sound good'?! What have we been doing?"

"Flying aimlessly," You said," This is kind of like an expensive joyride."

Aitana's mouth hung open. "You're so out of my league."

You grinned, all suave with years of charming foreign dignitaries. "Pretty sure you're the one who's out of my league." You leaned towards her, lips skimming the shell of her ear. "You know, the bed is pretty big. The cabin's almost soundproof." You wiggled your brows. "Feel like joining the mile-high club?"

"You want me to agree to join the mile high club? In the private jet of the English royal family?"

"What? Not fancy enough for you?"

"You might want to make our excuses. I'd hate for your bodyguard to think I'm rude."

Your bodyguard, in the end, didn't think Aitana to be rude at all. Even though the two of you disappeared into the bedroom for the remaining time of the flight.

"What time do we land?" She asked.

You hooked your shoulder over your chin, throwing your bare leg over her hip. She was lying on her side facing away from you but that didn't stop you from being as close as humanly possible to her.

"Hmm," You hummed," An hour? Hour and a half? Depends on if they've already found an airport to land at."

"Is this your world?" She asked with a little giggle," Taking your fancy jet to places without even a plan?"

"Well," Your voice dropped low as you kissed her naked shoulder," I do have a plan. It's fifty percent complete now."

"Oh, yeah? What was the plan?"

"Well..." You trailed kisses down her skin. "The first part was getting you to agree to get on the plane with me. The second part was having my wicked, wicked way with you in said plane. The rest of it? Wait and see, princess."

"Princess? I think you'll find that you're the only princess here."

"Not if I marry you. Then there'll be two princesses on the plane."

You felt Aitana tense under your touches. She went rigid like every muscle had been locked into place.

She rolled onto her back, steering up at you with wide and unblinking eyes.

"You want to marry me?"

You frowned, eyebrows drawing together in confusion. "I don't do this," You said," I don't date for fun. I've never dated for fun. I date to marry someone. I'm dating you so I can marry you. I want to see you walk down the aisle at Westminster Abbey. I want cameras to pick up me saying 'holy shit' because you're so pretty. Yes, Aitana, I want to marry you."

She kept staring at you and frankly, it put you on edge.

"Don't you want that too?"

She surged forward, tugging you into a heated kiss.

You tried to kiss back as best you could but she had really caught you off guard with the urgency of it. You didn't know when you ended up on your back but you did.

Aitana sat above you, legs straddling your hips like she was sat on a throne.

"God," She said," Of course I want to marry you."

You grinned. "I'm sure my father has property in Spain, in Barcelona even. I could move."

"Just like that?"

"Just like that. You won't have to retire from football yet. I can be signed off on some long-term international duty. Building ties with Spain and what-not."

"A house near the stadium," Aitana continued," With a garden, big enough for a pet."

"A trellis with ivy growing on it," You said," Small enough that no paps will bother us but big enough to have my brothers and their kids visit."

"Big enough for kids of our own."

"Little princes and princesses who grow up to play football for their country, whichever of ours they choose."

"Just like that?"

"Just like that."

"But how? You're royalty. Your father is king."

"And I'm his third child," You say," He's got his heir. He has his spare. What am I? The spare's spare? Aitana, I love you. I'd leave the family if it meant I got to marry you."

"Really?"

"Really."

Aitana grinned at you, leaning down. "Yes, I will marry you."

You grinned back at her. "Once we land, I'll get you a ring. We can start the honeymoon early."

"I like that plan."

[ginxyy]

The Maid

Being Mingyus Maid really was full of perks like being fucked in a practice room.

Mingyu, with his disarming smile and gentle nature, made it easy to forget the boundaries of our roles. He would often drop playful comments that made my cheeks heat up, his laughter filling the space around us, creating a warmth that felt like the sun's rays creeping in through the window.

As the weeks turned into months, the initial awkwardness faded away like mist on a warm morning. I began to accompany him and the other members of Seventeen during their practices. Each session felt electric in a way I had never anticipated. The sound of their laughter mingled with the rhythmic beats of their choreography, and I found myself captivated not just by the art of their performance but by the way Mingyu moved.

He glided across the floor with a grace that belied his towering figure, his every movement telling a story. Among the encouragement he received from the other members, my heart swelled with pride, a response I never knew I could feel.

One particular evening stood out like a beacon. The studio was expansive, mirrors lining the walls and amplifying the energy in the air. I'd stayed late to watch them practice, caught up in the breathtaking synchronization of their movements. As the music played on, the rest of the guys began to filter out, one by one, leaving Mingyu and me in this confessional space where everything felt possible.

He approached me slowly, his hands shoved into the pockets of his sweatpants, the sheen of exertion glistening on his skin. I could feel my heart rate quickening as he stood closer, the air thick with an unspoken tension. The world outside faded—the sounds of laughter and chatter from the rest of the team muffled as Mingyu raised his brow, a hint of mischief dancing in his eyes.

“Mingyu, aren't you tired?” I asked, attempting to bring levity to this charged atmosphere, though my voice faltered.

“Tired of what?” He stepped nearer, the gap between us closing to a mere whisper, the faint warmth of his breath sending shivers down my spine.

I swallowed, my pulse thrumming loudly in my ears as time seemed to slow. “Of dancing,” I prompted, though I could feel my heart daring him to say something more.

Instead of responding, he slid behind me, the cool glass of the mirror meeting my back. I could see his reflection, the way his hair fell into his eyes, and the way he leaned closer, almost grazing the skin of my arm, igniting a spark that held us in that moment one suspended between friendship and something far deeper.

“Mingyu…” My voice trailed off, uncertainty fighting with yearning as I felt his phantom touch lingering in the air. Those moments stretched, and I could see the flicker of desire in his gaze deepen. The tension escalated, thumping against my chest like the staccato of a drum.

Then, in an unexpected yet sweet motion, he turned me around, cupping my face with those gentle hands that had once gripped the fabric of my heart through laughter and playful banter. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this,” he murmured, his voice low, almost a growl that sent a rush of heat flooding through me.

Before I could respond, he leaned in, his lips brushing against mine tentative, testing the waters of this intoxicating connection that had grown between us. Fire ignited where our lips met, a swell of passion in what was meant to be a simple kiss. My instinct was to melt into him, to lose myself in the luxury of his presence that made everything else disappear. His kiss deepened, encouraging me to wrap my arms around his neck as I pulled him closer, the mirror behind us reflecting a world where only we existed.

The urgency washed over us like a tidal wave. Suddenly, I felt my body press against the cool glass, the juxtaposition igniting a wild need within me.

I could see our breaths mingling, the delicate fog forming on the surface, a clear reminder of the heat between us even as the world outside faded to nothing. His hands roamed gently, exploring uncharted territories of my waist, pulling me closer, igniting every nerve ending in my body.

“Mingyu, I—” I tried to speak, but words slipped away as he kissed me again, deeper this time, like he was claiming me as his own. There was a rawness in the way our mouths moved against each other, a synchronicity that felt both new and familiar, a delicate dance I was thrilled to partake in.

We pulled apart for a brief moment, both of us panting, our foreheads resting against one another.

The warmth of his body enveloped me, and the pulse of his heartbeat was a steady rhythm that mirrored my own. “I want you,” he confessed, his voice laced with urgency. The sincerity in his gaze fractured the remnants of hesitation between us, and I realized I wanted him too not just as a fleeting desire but as something tangible, genuine.

“Mingyu, I…” I hesitated, unsure how to express the torrent of emotions flooding through me. My mind raced with thoughts of what this moment meant in the grand scheme, but as he captured my lips again, all I could think about was how right it felt. Mingyu pulled me closer, our bodies fitting perfectly together in a warming embrace

Mingyu’s embrace was intoxicating, his warmth wrapping around me, melting any reservations I had left. His body pressed against mine, strong and sure, a tangible manifestation of the tension that had been building between us for months. My fingers traced the curve of his shoulders, feeling the taut muscles beneath his shirt as his lips claimed mine again, more insistent this time, as if he had been holding back for far too long.

His hands explored my body with a deliberate slowness, moving from my waist to the curve of my back, sending shivers down my spine with every touch. I felt the coolness of the glass behind me, but it did little to temper the heat that was blooming inside me, a fire stoked by every kiss, every caress. My heart was racing, my breath coming in shallow gasps as the desire between us deepened, becoming something tangible, something undeniable.

“Mingyu…” I whispered against his lips, my voice trembling with the weight of the emotions swirling inside me. My hands slid up to his neck, pulling him closer, needing more of him, wanting to lose myself in the intensity of this moment. I had never felt this way before, as if I was teetering on the edge of something vast and unknown, but it didn’t scare me. Mingyu didn’t scare me. He made me feel safe, even in the midst of this overwhelming desire.

He groaned softly as my nails grazed the back of his neck, his lips moving from my mouth to my jaw, planting soft, open-mouthed kisses along the delicate skin there. I tilted my head back, giving him full access as his lips trailed down my neck, lingering on the pulse point that was thrumming wildly under his touch. Each kiss sent sparks through my body, igniting a need that was growing more urgent by the second.

“I’ve wanted this,” he murmured against my skin, his breath hot and ragged. “I’ve wanted you… for so long.”

His words sent a thrill through me, a confirmation of the unspoken connection we had been nurturing for months. I hadn’t allowed myself to fully acknowledge it before, the way he looked at me, the way his touch lingered just a little too long when we were alone, the playful comments that held a deeper meaning beneath the surface. But now, here in this moment, there was no denying it. He wanted me, and I wanted him too more than I had ever allowed myself to admit.

My hands slid down to the hem of his shirt, my fingers trembling slightly as I tugged it upward. He pulled back just enough to allow me to slip the fabric over his head, revealing the toned muscles of his chest and arms. The sight of him his skin glistening with a thin sheen of sweat from the earlier practice, the soft rise and fall of his chest as he breathed heavily sent a wave of heat rushing through me. I reached out, my fingers tracing the lines of his abs, marveling at the way his body responded to my touch.

He watched me with dark, hooded eyes, his desire evident in the way he moved, slow and deliberate, as if savoring every moment. “You’re beautiful,” he murmured, his voice low and rough, and the sincerity in his words made my heart skip a beat.

I felt a blush rise to my cheeks at the intensity of his gaze, but there was no time for modesty now. I reached for him, pulling him back to me, needing the feel of his skin against mine. Our lips met again, more urgently this time, as the desire between us reached a fever pitch. His hands found the hem of my shirt, lifting it over my head with a swift, practiced motion. The cool air hit my skin, but it was quickly replaced by the warmth of Mingyu’s hands as they slid up my sides, his touch gentle but insistent.

His lips trailed down my neck, over my collarbone, leaving a path of fire in their wake. I could feel his breath against my skin, the soft exhale sending shivers down my spine as his hands explored every inch of me. I gasped as his lips found the swell of my breast, his mouth hot and wet as he kissed me there, his tongue flicking out to tease me. My body arched against him, my fingers tangling in his hair as he continued his slow, torturous exploration.

“Mingyu,” I breathed, my voice trembling with need. “I can’t… I need…”

He pulled back just enough to meet my gaze, his eyes dark with desire but filled with something deeper something that made my heart ache with the force of it. “I know,” he whispered, his voice low and rough. “I need you too.”

In one fluid motion, he lifted me, his hands strong and sure as he carried me away from the mirror, moving us toward the soft expanse of the couch that had become so familiar to me over the months I had spent in his home. He laid me down gently, his body hovering over mine, and for a moment, he just looked at me, his eyes filled with so much emotion it made my breath catch in my throat.

“I want to take my time with you,” he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. “I want to remember every moment.”

His words sent a fresh wave of heat through me, and I reached for him, pulling him down so our bodies were flush against each other. His skin was warm, his muscles taut beneath my touch as I wrapped my arms around him, needing to feel every inch of him. He groaned softly as our hips met, the thin barrier of clothing between us only heightening the intensity of the moment.

His lips found mine again, slow and sensual, his tongue teasing the seam of my mouth before slipping inside, deepening the kiss. His hands roamed over my body, exploring, caressing, driving me wild with need. I could feel the heat pooling low in my belly, the anticipation building with every touch, every kiss, until it felt like I might explode from the intensity of it.

Mingyu’s hands slid lower, his fingers dipping beneath the waistband of my pants, and I gasped at the sensation, my body arching against his touch. He kissed me again, more urgently this time, as his fingers worked their way lower, exploring me with a tenderness that made my heart ache. I could feel the tension building, the pleasure mounting with every stroke, every kiss, until I was trembling beneath him, my body strung tight with need.

“Mingyu,” I gasped, my voice breathless. “Please…”

He pulled back just enough to look at me, his eyes filled with the same urgent desire that I felt. “Are you sure?” he asked, his voice low and rough, as if it was taking all his control to hold back.

I nodded, unable to form the words, my body already responding to him in ways that left no room for doubt. I wanted this wanted him more than I had ever wanted anything before.

With a low groan, Mingyu captured my lips again, his hands moving with a newfound urgency as he rid us both of the last barriers between us. The sensation of his skin against mine, the heat of his body pressed so intimately against me, sent a shockwave of pleasure through me, and I gasped at the intensity of it. Every touch, every kiss was a promise, a declaration of the feelings we had been holding back for so long.

Mingyu’s movements were slow and deliberate, his touch gentle but insistent as he explored every inch of me. His lips found mine again, and I could taste the desire on him, the need that matched my own in intensity. He kissed me deeply, his tongue teasing mine in a dance that mirrored the slow, sensual rhythm of his hands as they roamed over my body.

The world around us faded away, leaving only the two of us, locked in this moment of pure, unfiltered emotion. It wasn’t just about the physical though the pleasure that coursed through me was unlike anything I had ever experienced it was about something deeper. This was the culmination of months of stolen glances, lingering touches, and unspoken words. This was the moment where everything changed.

And as Mingyu’s body moved against mine, as our breaths mingled and our hearts raced in sync, I knew that there was no going back from this. We had crossed a line, one that had been waiting for us all along, and there was no turning back.

I didn’t want to.

(Ok might be my first time doing sexy time in this much detail but i kinda liked it haha. Let me know if you did too)

[polarisjisung]

LOVE ON THE COURT | 29 NOT AGAIN

SYNOPSIS | every college student has their struggles, but raising her younger brother has Y/N top of the list, struggling her way through college whilst balancing her academics and basketball captaincy is difficult no doubt and with Jaemin, her ex best friend and captain of the guys basketball team, and his growing one sided hatred towards her, it doesn't seem to be getting any easier

WARNINGS | sexual innuendos, swearing, mentions + pretty detailed description of a panic attack, lwk abandonment issues

NOTES | the girls are fighting... you didn't think I'd let them make up this fast did you?? a much shorter chapter today I'm sorry 😓

15:27pm , after the game

Y/n knew ningning inside out, they'd been friends for their whole life, best friends for a number of years, they'd spent longer together than apart.

Y/n and ningning were practically sisters. They'd fought over stupid things like if apple juice was better than orange juice, they'd stolen each others clothes, done each others nails as post breakup therapy— they'd experienced love and loss, and they'd always experienced it together.

It was and always had been them against the world.

Personal problems had always existed, but they'd face them head on and, most importantly, together.

So y/n knew what ningning was feeling, maybe not exactly, but she certainly knew why ningning felt the way she did.

And sure, Ningning's words had hurt y/n too, but that was the thing, they'd said the best and worst things to one another.

Being so close to someone can be a double-edged sword. Knowing their triggers and insecurities so well that in the heat of the moment, it’s almost too easy to throw those daggers. The intimacy shared can turn into a weapon of knowing exactly what to say to hit them where it hurts. In those moments, it’s like being caught in a toxic cycle, where love and pain intertwine.

Regret sets in as soon as the words leave the mouth, but the damage is done, leaving both people feeling raw and vulnerable. It's a harsh reminder that knowing someone deeply can sometimes mean knowing how to wound them just as easily. So y/n knew that Ningning was showing nothing but her concern.

But equally, she understood she deserved somewhat of an apology as well, even if Ningning's words had come from a good place, they'd hurt, and perhaps they hurt even more so coming from her.

It seemed a simple explanation why this argument of theirs had rested at the forefront of her mind for so long too, because Ningning was the only person in her life who Y/n couldn't imagine losing. And after everything that she'd been through, after the people she'd lost, and the relationships she'd seen go with them, she knew she wouldn't let herself be to blame. She wouldn't let herself lose a friend, least of all Ningning, just because she didn't communicate.

Or at least that was her plan, as she made her way down the hallway of the hotel, her hair still dripping from the shower she'd just taken, gripping way too many snacks for the two of them to share. Minjun followed after her, still gushing about having seen his older sister play for the first time, begging her to teach him how to dribble the ball like her, a grin plastered across his face. It was endearing, really.

And Y/n swore she only turned to smile at him for a second, but in the next, she felt her heart drop and her blood run cold. It felt like the ground shifted beneath her feet, and suddenly, she was trapped in a whirlwind of way too many thoughts, coming way too fast.

There, stood across the hallway, was a man she had made many desperate attempts to forget. To no avail, of course.

She blinked, rubbing her fists against her eyes hurriedly, as if he was nothing but a figment of her imagination, that when she looked up again he'd disappear and this would be nothing but a bad dream. But there he was, struggling to open the door to his room, angrily staring down at the key card with furrowed brows.

He seemed older. His hairs greying and wrinkles setting in across the feafures she recognised so well, his smile lines deeper than the last time she'd seen him.

The last time she'd seen him.

Her breaths quickened at the sight of him, becoming deeper yet each inhale felt shallower than the last, and her chest tightened like a vice. This wasn't happening, it couldn't, not here, not now.

She could hear the muffled voice beside her asking why they'd stopped walking, she could feel minjun's grip tighten around her, she could see the way the man turned his head at the realisation he was no longer alone in the haway, but it all felt distant, like she was underwater.  Unsure how to answer, she stood silently, gaze locked on the man, blinking rapidly, questioning if he was really, truly stood in front of her at all. As soon as he locked eyes with her, she felt the bile rush up her throat and a distant ringing in her ears, her hands beginning to shake against the smaller ones that held hers. Y/n felt like she was drowning. But she knew she couldn't. It was a luxury she couldn't afford, and the soft skin brushing against her hand was a reminder of that.

Panic surged through her, and y/n fought the urge to break down, feeling the walls closing in on her. The bright lights overhead felt too harsh, illuminating the doubts swirling in her head, making it hard to focus. Calm down. She thought, but she couldn't. She couldn't think she couldn't move, and worst of all, she couldn't calm down. She convinced herself this was nothing, voiced out lies in her mind that echoed with uncertainty. Breathe, she thought. But she couldn't. It was as if every unresolved feeling crashed over her like a tidal wave, leaving her gasping for air and desperate for an escape. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to ground herself, but the memories flooded back faster, unrelenting and unforgiving.

Y/n found herself tugging harshly against the smaller wrist that was still loosely resting in her grip, making a sharp 180 and jetting off down the hallway, with shaky steps and ragged breaths.

She had to go, she had to leave, she had to do it now. Her phone vibrated in her hands only seconds later, a painfully familiar contact flashing across the screen, and all y/n could do was throw the device into the bottom of her bag, stuffing her belongings in on top, making no effort to answer the questions coming from the confused young boy who watched her. The blood rushed to her head so quickly, too quickly, in fact, and she swore the room in front of her begun to spin.

Her dad hadn't called her in years, not a single message, not a single word, so why now was he calling? Why was he reaching out now? Just because he'd seen her? Did some sort of shitty parental guilt kick in at the sight of his now grown children? Did he feel inadequate, maybe even jealous that they were doing just fine without him? Y/n didn't know, and she didn't care, but seeing him was still enough for her to take an unwanted trip down memory lane, reliving every moment since he'd left. Her chest tightened, the lump in her throat growing to the point that she couldn't breathe no matter how hard she tried. Still, she kept going, scanning the room to make sure she hadn't left anything behind.

Minjun had never seen his sister like this, so close to breaking down, and y/n didn't plan on letting that change today, sucking in deep breaths and wiping her teary eyes as she pulled his jacket around him. It was getting cold outside now, and she wouldn't let one careless mistake from her because of something so trivial, leading to him becoming sick.

Y/n could barely function, struggling to pull the zipper loop up and through the jacket, still she kept going. Her body ran on autopilot, muscle memory taking full control as she silently pulled the bags through the door and held a hand out for minjun to follow. Too occupied in her own thoughts she rushed out of the hotel with urgency, taking long strides towards the cabs that waited outside, only realising she was moving way too fast for Minjun to keep up when his small rushed breaths filled the air. She needed to calm down, she wasn't alone and she had to act like it. Minjun was her responsibility, and she needed to take care of him.

She muttered out an apology, quick, sincere, but short and found herself falling back into the  cycle of her own thoughts again. Comfort was a thought far away, but the surety of heading home, caused the racing of her heart to ease just slightly, a dull ache developing in her arm now that she'd finally set down all her bags inside the cab, a cramp settling in.

In that moment, y/n felt the overwhelming feeling of solitude press down in her, honing in from all sides, and the ache of abandonment crept into each corner of her heart. The pain was bitter and fuck, it ran deep.

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[aphroditelovesu]

In the middle of the night

❝commission: in the spirit of kinktober, I'd like to make an NSFW request that gives some insight into the intimate relationship between Alexander and y/n (pre kidnapping). In other words, something that shows what happens when Alexander spends the night in her tent. — requested by 💻 anon.

❝ 📜 — lady l: It's been a while since I did something with a touch of smut and this one was more romantic, so I can't say lol, but I liked it. I hope you like it and forgive me for any mistakes! ❤️

❝tw: smut, oral sex (female receiving) and praise kink (?).

❝📜pairing: soft yandere!alexander the great x female!reader.

❝word count: 2,238.

Your tent was silent, shrouded in a blanket of darkness that seemed to weigh down on your shoulders. Outside, the wind whistled, whispering between the ropes and the openings of the canvas, a constant and melancholic sound. It was an almost comforting noise, as if the night outside was trying to lull your restless thoughts. Even the soldiers who normally talked loudly and made jokes were now deep in sleep, their grumbling and snoring just a distant murmur.

The night had already gone on longer than it should have, and you knew that staying awake until that hour would be a problem. However, the feeling of discomfort that weighed on your chest did not allow you to rest. For hours, you rolled from one side to the other, trying to surrender to sleep, but each attempt seemed to worsen the restlessness, and the darkness of the tent became a kind of prison. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, you decided to get up and move away from the crumpled cot that only increased your frustration. As you lit a candle to illuminate the tent, you were finally able to see properly.

Near a small trunk of belongings, in which your kitty pajamas were carefully stored, there was a chair that had been arranged with care. You settled into it, adjusting your posture, and picked up a book that was nearby: a copy of the Iliad, a gift from Alexander. The worn cover showed signs of use, as if it had passed through several hands before reaching yours. You slid your fingers over the surface of the book, feeling the relief and texture of the leather. The familiarity of the gesture brought a kind of momentary relief, an anchor in the midst of the chaos that was your mind.

As you opened the book, the complexity of ancient Greek leapt out at you, a language you had never even thought of learning, but which was now strangely accessible to you. It wasn’t just the understanding of the words, but the cadence, the melody of the sentences, everything seemed to echo naturally in your mind, as if a subtle spell or an unknown power was guiding you through that story. For a brief moment, you reflected on the strangeness of it all — being able to understand a language so distant and from ages past. Perhaps it was a stroke of luck, or the design of a greater force. Either way, you knew you would be lucky to be able to communicate at this time; total isolation would be a much crueler fate.

Your eyes read each word with anticipation, a smile adorning your lips as the story of the Trojan War was told in the most original and truthful way possible. The Iliad was truly something worth reading, no matter what Age you were in.

You were so immersed in the words of the Iliad, so lost in the distant universe of epic battles and ancient heroes, that the world around you seemed to disappear. Time and space within the tent became irrelevant, and all you heard were the imaginary sounds of swords and shields, the Greek lines echoing in your mind.

It was then that a soft but unexpected sound brought you back to reality. A discreet, almost restrained clearing of your throat. Your heart skipped a beat, and you almost let the book slip from your hands. The shock you felt was immediate, and for a moment, even your gaze took a while to adjust to the figure that materialized at the entrance to the tent, half hidden by the soft shadows cast by the light of the lantern.

Alexander, arms crossed and a half smile on his lips, watched your reaction. He seemed to be trying hard not to laugh, which only intensified that amused glint in his eyes. ''Sorry. I didn’t plan to scare you,'' he said, his voice low, but with a hint of amusement that he couldn’t completely hide.

You felt your cheeks heat up, a little embarrassed by the reaction, and still trying to regain your composure after the scare.

''No... I...'' You took a deep breath and forced a shaky smile, ''It’s okay.''

Alexander just nodded, his different colored eyes shining when he noticed the Iliad in your hands. Oh, you had forgotten.

The Iliad was his favorite book. Especially the story of Achilles and Patroclus.

''I didn’t want to interrupt your reading.'' Alexander murmured, approaching you. He stopped next to your chair, his attentive eyes watching you and you couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable under his gaze.

You couldn’t say anything, just nodded.

''But I saw a light on and I got curious.'' Alexander continued, placing his clumsy hands on your shoulders. ''Can’t sleep?''

''I... I’m not sleepy...'' You murmured, looking at him, observing his features. Alexander was an attractive man, his features were strong and marked and the way his lips, full but small, were slightly parted, made him even more charming. Although not that tall, Alexander was strong and that made him even more attractive.

''I can’t sleep either.'' Alexander said and smiled at you, noticing that you were watching him. You felt your cheeks heat up and looked away to the book in your hands. There was nothing wrong with finding your husband attractive, right?

''Why? Did something happen?'' You found yourself asking, curious.

Alexander shrugged. ''My body refuses to rest.''

You nodded, knowing exactly how he felt, because you felt the same way. Your body refused to rest, no matter that you felt tiredness hitting you hard these past few weeks.

Your heart suddenly raced, but this time for a completely different reason. As you tried to formulate a response, something to break the awkward silence, you felt Alexander's unexpected touch. He approached you, with a delicate and almost reverent gesture, and you held your breath as he reached out, his fingers gently touching your face.

He brushed a strand of your hair away, carefully tucking it behind your ear. His fingers, warm and gentle, slid lightly over your skin, leaving a trail of heat. Each second seemed to stretch on, and you found yourself unable to look away from Alexander's eyes, which watched you with an intensity that made your face heat up even more.

"You are beautiful." Alexander whispered, staring at you as if he could read your soul.

You felt your mouth suddenly go dry, at the same time your body warmed with his words.

''Simply gorgeous.'' He said, bringing his face closer to yours. You stood still, barely breathing, when he finally captured your lips in a soft, delicate kiss. His lips touched yours with an unexpected tenderness, as if he were being careful not to scare you.

The kiss was sweet, almost hesitant, but deep in its simplicity. And, little by little, you felt your own tension disappear, as if the world had become a lighter, safer place, and you finally found the courage to close your eyes and allow yourself to feel, to allow yourself to reciprocate.

Alexander's hands slid gently to your head, his fingers intertwining in your hair as he tilted your face slightly, deepening the kiss with increasing intensity. The gesture, at once tender and passionate, dissolved any trace of discomfort or hesitation that might have remained. Without thinking, you brought your own hands to his shoulders, feeling the firmness of his muscles beneath his clothes, and returned the kiss with equal fervor.

Alexander’s hands slid down your arms, gently pulling you out of the chair as your lips parted. He kept his gaze fixed on yours, his eyes burning with a desire and tenderness that stole your breath. Unhurriedly, his strong arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer, your warm body pressed against his. Each movement was careful, as if he wanted to enjoy every second of that moment that seemed eternal.

There were few times when you lay together after your wedding night.

With a light touch, he guided you to the cot, the room enveloped in soft shadows and flickering lamplight, making the moment even more intimate. His hands, marked by calluses and scars from years of battle, moved with surprisingly delicate skill as he untied the knot of the white chiton that wrapped you. The fabric slid smoothly, abandoning your body and falling in a soft murmur to the floor.

As the cold night air touched your skin, Alexander's eyes explored you with silent reverence, his gaze as intense as the touch of his hands.

"Beautiful." Alexander whispered, his hands caressing your bare waist, squeezing the flesh lightly. Your breathing became heavy as he attacked your neck, his lips leaving bite marks on your skin, marks that you knew could not be hidden so easily.

Your head lolled to the side, giving his conqueror more access to your neck. Your eyes closed in delight as Alexander's hands rose to your breasts, squeezing them with a strength that would not hurt.

You gasped as his fingers squeezed your nipples, the cold and the touch making them perk up. Alexander squeezed, massaged until he finally stopped kissing your neck and pulled away a little, watching you for a few minutes like a hungry lion. He smiled and carefully pushed you onto the cot, making you sit up. Alexander quickly and conveniently removed the chiton and you held your breath when you saw his visible excitement.

You couldn’t help but feel yourself getting more aroused at the sight, your insides heating up and your most intimate parts naturally lubricating. Despite the scars that covered Alexander’s body, he was a sight to behold. His muscles, years of hard training, were palpable and you found yourself wanting to touch them, to enjoy them.

Alexander smiled broadly at you. There was no more embarrassment, just a husband and wife enjoying each other’s looks.

"Lie down." Alexander ordered, his voice husky and authoritative, leaving no room for questioning. You wisely obeyed him and lay down on the cot.

Alexander sat on the edge and his hands moved up your legs, parting them enough for him to slip his upper body between them. You sighed, a little confused but excited at the same time. His eyes were fixed on your pussy, on your arousal.

You expected him to get straight to the point, that he would just fuck you. Foreplay wasn't something common back then, it wasn't something that would please a woman at least.

But Alexander's next action surprised you.

He brought his face closer to your center and, without warning, his tongue touched your pussy, tasting you for the first time. Your body shivered at the sudden touch, at the texture of his tongue.

"Alexander... W-What?" You tried to question him but, perhaps to shut you up, Alexander sucked your clit, really sucked it, his mouth sucking the sensitive skin and his tongue making circular movements that left you breathless.

Alexander pulled back a little and you could see his chin glistening slightly with your slick in the dim, flickering light of the chandelier.

"I heard some soldiers talking about it..." Alexander murmured, smiling at you as his fingers found their way to your pussy and he slid two of them inside your heat, feeling your inner walls immediately tighten around his fingers. "And I decided to give it a try. Curiosity, perhaps. By the way, my Queen, you taste excellent."

You could have sworn you were going to cum when you heard him call you Queen. Maybe it was a new kink you had acquired, but by the gods, it was something really nice to hear, to be praised. And, the best part, you really are a Queen.

Alexander kissed the inside of your thigh, feeling how hot you were. He sniffed the air and you had to suppress a moan at the sight you were seeing and, perhaps, because he still had two fingers inside you.

Alexander brought his face closer to your pussy again and licked it greedily, his tongue lingering on your clit, on that spot on your body that he knew would leave your legs trembling. He was a quick learner and Alexander knew that that spot between your legs left you breathless. Your head fell back, your sighs and moans of pleasure leaving your lips without any shame.

Alexander squeezed your thighs as he devoured you and his fingers fucked you in a fast and pleasurable rhythm. His tongue pressed against your clit, bringing you closer and closer to your release. Your legs trembled slightly, your hands gripping Alexander's dirty blonde hair as you finally reached your climax. You came in his mouth, clenching his hair, your body releasing your juices as you finally felt yourself relax. The orgasm relieved all the tension that was plaguing you.

Your breathing slowly returned to normal, and you looked up at Alexander, who pulled away slightly and smiled broadly at you. After removing his fingers from your pussy, Alexander brought them to his mouth, tasting more of your taste.

You felt like you could attack him right then and there.

Alexander chuckled as he saw your expression, the pleasure, excitement, and desire taking over your features. It was a sight to behold and one he planned to worship for as long as he could.

You were his Queen and should be worshipped as such.

[notmorbid]

i could live here forever, pt. 2.

dialogue prompts from i could live here forever: a novel by hanna halperin.

you could be famous. you could do anything you want.

if you snore, i'm booting you to the couch.

i think about you, and everything bad just disappears.

that's kind of how i fall asleep at night. talking to you in my head.

it's really good to hear your voice. where are you?

do whatever you have to do.

are you still attracted to me?

you would always be welcome with me.

you're scaring me right now.

you seem really anxious. are you okay?

you're the shit. you deserve the best.

it makes me feel better to know where your head is at.

it's not paranoid when it turns out you're actually being watched.

would you mind walking me home?

thanks for walking me home. i appreciate it.

is this safe? are you safe?

i'm going to remember this day for the rest of my life.

it's hard to hear, that's all.

you use people. it's something that you do.

you know i'll always pick up. no matter what.

i left out parts of the story.

i think we should go to the hospital. we can go together.

i'm really sorry. you're not seeing me at my best.

what's a seven-letter word for a desert in a glass?

i'm kind of freaking out right now.

are you talking to anyone? a counselor or a therapist?

it's almost over. you're doing great.

i don't say this lightly, but you might have saved my life.

you deserve to be with someone who's good to you all the time.

maybe we both blew it.

i wish i could meet you for the first time right now.

i wish i could be my best self for you.

i really do believe that art can save a person.

being admired and being loved aren't the same thing.

i didn't think you were actually going to come.

you should trust your instincts.

one day you're going to look back on this and you're going to laugh.

i know it doesn't feel that way now, but you're going to be okay.

we never talk about that night.

home is a memory.

i don't think i would have survived that time without you.

do you want me to come in with you?

i remembered you taller.

i wish you'd called ahead of time.

you're as good as they come.

i didn't know where my feelings ended and yours began.

it's brave, what you did today.

i know you're lying to me.

i think things happen how they're supposed to.

i used to feel very alone. i was scared i'd always feel that way.

with you, i feel like i'm part of something.

you bring out something different in me. something i didn't even know i was capable of.

i can't be the only thing that gets you through the day.

what i want most in this world is to have a family.

i've never loved a face more than i've loved yours.

maybe this is what family is supposed to feel like.

every time i try to be normal, i mess it up.

see you soon. miss you already.

you look like someone who has their life together.

what do you like?

you ask good questions.

you're not a martyr. get over yourself.

what we have is complicated, but it's good and real.

were you waiting for me all this time?

i wish we got to know each other more.

we don't know each other well, but i'm here for you.

are you going to be okay?

i feel ____ here with me all the time.

nothing is as real as the person beside you.

[st4rychnine]

Cheating Spree ★ Suguru Geto

mature content!

you can't feel anything anymore; the rain seems to have washed everything away. it soaks through your clothes, chilling you down to the bone, yet you don't care, you can't. you're done caring, you're tired. 

you sigh, finally pausing your long walk to look up at the darkened sky, pouring rain as if it was weeping for you.

then you realize. you're in front of gojo and geto's shared apartment. you gasp, sigh, and think… this was as good a time as any. despite the fact that you're literally a dripping wet mess, you're going to break up with satoru.

when you ring the doorbell, it's suguru that answers.

at a hulking five foot eleven, bulging muscles, obsidian eyes, and unending miles of dark hair, you swear on your life that suguru geto is the most attractive man you'd ever seen. and here he was, standing before you in nothing more than grey sweatpants. 

"you alright? why're you standing in the rain like that; wanna come in?" his voice is low, husky, sexy. you stammer while trying to answer.

"I– is…" you swallow, clear your throat. "Is satoru home? There's… something I'd like to… talk to him about. briefly." it takes everything in you to keep your eyes trained on his.

oh man. when you say the man was built like a Greek God, you meant it. but it was an awful time to thirst over your ex's best friend. even though he was leaning against the door frame without a single care in the world. even though you could clearly see that sexy trail of hair, stretching all the way from his lower abdomen and disappearing into his sweatpants.

holy fuck. 

suguru hums and meets your eyes, amusement dancing in the obsidian depths. then he shakes his head. "nah, I should be asking you that though. earlier, he told me that he was going on some bar date with you, so. unless…” then it dawns on him.

you thought you were behind feelings, but you couldn't stop the small twinge of pain in your chest that your boyfriend was away screwing other girls and lying to his best friend that he was out with you.

it sucked.

you blink at the news, then sigh, resigned. "alright. I'll… be on my way then."

just as you turn around, ready to leave, he stops you with a call of your name. "I don't think you should be out in this weather. come on in. you can stay the night."

you don't have the strength to disagree. 

in about fifteen minutes, you've settled on the couch in one of suguru's old shirts, swathed in blankets with a cup of steaming coffee warming your hands.

suguru's at the kitchen counter, whipping up something small for himself.

the coffee doesn't do it for you. you need something stronger; something to make you forget. "geto? do you happen to have any alcohol on you?”

“uh… I think so. should be somewhere,” he says, opening and closing a few cupboards until he hits the jackpot. he gets out a tall bottle, tinted a dark black, and pops it open. he pours the contents into two glasses, then turns around, hands you one filled with a bromine-coloured liquid.

you accept it gratefully, downing half the glass in a single gulp. 

it's liquid fire, leaving you wincing as it slides down your throat. liquid fire, but it tasted lovely. it had an orange-like flavour with a slightly bitter undertone. "it's nice." you say, and it's true.

suguru smiles. "I know – it's our most expensive." he takes a sip of his drink.  “you can sleep in Satoru's room. I don't think he'll be returning tonight.”

you shake your head, a pang striking your chest. “I'd rather sleep on the sofa.” you say matter-of-factly. 

he hums in response.  “you can take my bed then. i’ll take the sofa.” 

again, you shake your head, insisting on the sofa. the last thing you wanted to do was to make the poor guy uncomfortable. he's already being such a darling, helping out a brokenhearted girl. you didn't want to inconvenience him any further. 

but that's technically what you end up doing because he insists, and you're unable to argue. you down the rest of your drink and hold out your glass for another.

while refilling the glass, Suguru asks, “so… do you want to watch a movie?”

you don't say no.

you end up watching some stupid fucking horror movie, which left you practically trembling against suguru, covering your face and peeking between your fingers.

you hadn't expected it to be this scary. it was a movie that had always been on your to-watch list, and now, you absolutely regret choosing it. it's interesting, but definitely won't leave you with peace of mind for the next few days.

“sorry…” you murmur, voice pitched high and slurred from the alcohol. “I don't do well with horror movies.”

suguru laughs, eyes glued to the screen. “why’d you pick it, then?”

“I don't knowwwww!” you cry, flinching at a scene and covering your eyes. God knows you might share suguru’s bed with him tonight. no, not in that way. “i didn't know it was this scary!”

“it's not even that scary,” he says, still chuckling.

“yeah, maybe to you! we're sharing your bed!” you cling onto his arm, burying your face in his shirt.

“really?” he smirks, and your face burns at the implied meaning. “fine, but you've gotta watch it.”

you shake your head, no.

“please?” suguru asks, trying to pry your hands away from your face. they don't budge. “aw, come on! its only fun if we watch it together!”

“I'm not here to have fun!”

“but you should, regardless of your purpose.” he tries to pry your fingers away from your face, and finally, you give in.

the rest of the movie is spent with you clutching at Suguru for a dear life and screaming, especially when unnecessary. 

by the time the movie is over you're a mess, laughing with tears running down your face. “ne– never again!” you half-sob.

he pats your head. “don't worry, you did good. at least you enjoyed it, yeah?”

you sniff and turn away.

he calls your name. twice. you refuse to answer though, feigning mock anger. although he probably deserves it genuine after forcing you to watch that stupid fucking movie. its your fault though, technically. you shrug and scoff.

Suguru decides in that moment. he's going to fuck you. being honest, he's always wanted to. and now, he's got a chance. he'll take it. oh and, he wanted to piss satoru off. it was well deserved. so once more, he calls you. 

you turn to him, pupils blown wide in the reflected television light, lips wet. damn, he wanted those around his cock.

he shifts closer to you; your lips are almost touching. you have no idea when the energy around the two of you changed.

"you want revenge on Satoru, yeah? well, I've got a plan." he mummurs huskily, his lips brushing yours. 

"wh– what is it?"

"let me fuck you." then he smashes his lips on yours.

the kiss is unlike anything you've ever experienced before – with satoru or otherwise – and, oh boy, you loved it. your lips are pried open, your tongue dancing with his in the most sloppy, lewd kiss you've ever partaken in. 

you know it's wrong. I mean– you're technically cheating on your boyfriend, aren't you?

but even as the thought crosses your mind, you push it away. 

tit for tat.

his hands grip your waist, pulling you even closer to him as the kiss gets even filthier and filthier, then the two of you pull away.

you're left panting and gasping for breath and suguru, well, looks otherwise unaffected. but the growing erection in his grey sweatpants states otherwise.

"you accept?" you swear his voice grows an octave deeper. 

you need him so bad. "ye– yes…" you whisper. "yes sir."

his thumb strokes your cheek, and he presses another kiss to your lips. "I want you to suck my cock for me. would you do that?” he whispers against them. you nod.

your heart beats furiously, head dizzy as you find yourself on your knees. you feel like you're dreaming.

if you are, then it's a good one.

suguru loosens the ropes on his sweatpants and pulls the front down, just enough for his boner to pop out.

it's longer and thicker than anything you've ever seen; not that you'd seen that many anyway. but still. it's length was tremendous – you'd roughly estimated about ten inches, his girth about thee.

all in all, you don't think it'll fit. in your mouth or otherwise.

"you're staring like you're seeing something extraordinary.” suguru smiles

you're about to dish out a mildly disturbed ‘because it is!’ but you hold your tongue and give the tip an experimental lick to stop him, from saying anything else.

then you take a big breath and wet it with your saliva before taking the thing into your mouth. 

the thing is monstrous, the head barely fitting past your lips. you try as possible to keep your teeth away from it, opening your mouth wider than comfortable. tears bead in your eyes, trickling down your cheeks.

you get the head, then the first few inches. you try to work your tongue around it as much as possible; if there was any one thing you learned while with satoru, tongue action was key.

you're less than halfway – about three inches in – and the tip was already poking the back of your throat. you have no idea what to do except keep going. so you take the next two inches. 

the wet suckling noises you make, the tears that stream down your cheeks – they turn suguru on even more, his cock twitching in your mouth. he's literally a grown man, but watching you struggle to get down the sheer length and girth of him is doing things to him. he's a grown man, but he's about to blow his load already. it takes everything in him not to. "fuck– you're doing quite good. you've got a bit more to go."

that certainly gets you going. you squeeze your eyes shut and swallow around him, willing yourself to not choke. you swallow down the next three, whimpering lowly around him. tears prickle at your eyes and trail down your cheeks.

"almost there. come on. thats my girl – fu– yeah?" suguru's voice is audibly strained, his fingers clutching your hair. oh man, he's about to lose it. 

you force yourself down on the last two, your nose finally pressed against his pubes. you tremble, forcing yourself to not choke around it's girth.

you did it! but at what cost?

you open your eyes, looking up at him though your lashes. My guy looks like a Greek god; long black hair sticking to his forehead and the sides of his face and his neck, thick brows furrowed, dark black eyes endless and glossy, and god, he's so fucking fine.

you're dripping through your underwear.

he calls your name in what is almost a moan, gripping your hair in a fist. "shit – fuck, don't look at me like that–"

you hum through a mouthful of dick then shrug. like what?

maintaining eye contact, you pull your head backward, almost choking as his length retracts from your throat. you pull back halfway, then go down again, swallowing the half-length. 

you continue the movements, – retract, then swallow – slow and jerky at first, but eventually, you begin to build a steady pace.

saliva and precum leak out of your mouth, coating his cock with a transparent sheen and suguru groans above you, hands gripping your face as his hips fuck subtly into your mouth.

a mild, salty taste builds at the back of your throat as his precum leaks from the tip of his dick. you use your tongue to pleasure him as much as possible, your jaw aching.

“fuuuuck– agh– shit, that feels good. fuck–” suguru grunts and slips his cock out of your mouth, wetting your cheeks with a mixture of saliva and precum, and smearing your tears.

“wh–” you begin, voice cracking. you clear your throat and start again. “what's wrong?”

“fuck, I'm… if you keep that up, I'm gonna cum.” suguru whispers through breathy pants. 

he's so pretty, you stare for a bit before answering. “that's fine. if you don't cum down my throat, where will you cum?” the alcohol in your blood makes you bolder than usual. 

he makes a sound deep in his throat and slips his cock back into your mouth, gripping the sides of your head and making you take the whole thing fully.

“I'm… I'm gonna fuck your mouth,” he mumbles, strands of dark hair falling over his eyes. slowly, his hips fuck his cock into your mouth, in and out, smearing precum around inside your mouth. 

he gasps lowly with each thrust he makes into your mouth, abdominal muscles tensing as he does so. his eyes are half-lidded, cheeks damp with sweat. 

as the pleasure builds, his hips increase their pace, until his cock is entering and exiting your mouth so fast, you're almost gagging around him. his gasps turn to small groans, his fingers gripping your hair tighter to slam your face into his pubes with each upward thrust he makes.

you can feel how close he is – his cock dripping and twitching in your mouth. you need him to cum, before your jaw cracks open and falls to the floor. so you suck in your cheeks even more, creating a strong vacuum that, from experience, would make Satoru spill instantly. 

it works it's intended effect.

"holy fucking shii–t.” he takes extra care in pronouncing the t. “fuck, keep that up. fuck, im cumming.” he warns, and that, he does.

ropes and ropes of hot salt spill into your mouth, down your throat. you almost choke, try to pull away, but suguru holds you there, letting his cum flow down your throat. it's salty and thick, and more of an acquired taste if anything, but its not completely awful.

Suguru groans deep in his throat with each spurt of him down your throat, his head tilted back, thick hair cascading down his back and sticking to his skin in some places with sweat. his eyes are half closed, cheeks flushed, and jaw locked tight to keep himself from moaning. though your tears, you still can't get over how absolutely beautiful he was.

he holds you there for a good minute, his cum never stopping its flow until it does, and you drag your head back, pulling him out of your mouth.

you cough, splutter. some of his cum exits through your nose and you wince.

“fu–fuck." suguru pants, chest heaving. “fuck, you're an expert.” 

you smile at that. “thanks,” you whisper, voice hoarse.

your skin is flushed, eyes dark and unfocused, a trickle of cum dripping down your jaw. you looked absolutely delectable. suguru could just eat you up.

and he decides he will – you need some loosening up anyways. 

he picks you up, biceps bulging, and you squeal as he all but flings you on the sofa.

before you can think, he's on top of you, lips back on yours, tongue entwined with his. a small moan escapes you, and he groans into your mouth, lips trailing down to your jaw, then your neck. 

“g– get– sugu–ahh! fu–uuh–ck!”

his teeth attack the skin, tongue lapping the fresh bruises as they appear. you know they'll turn an angry colour tomorrow but you can't care. you need him.

his palms trail up the shirt, skimming over your thighs then higher. higher, until–

his thumb brushes your clit and you jolt, body tending under his.

"you're dripping" he mumbles, pushing a thick digit inside you. "just from sucking my dick? fuck." 

you whimper in response.

suguru fucks you with that single finger, pumping it in and out if your drenched pussy. the steady build of pleasure has your legs almost locking around suguru's forearms. 

he adds another finger. That stretches you a bit, and you grit your teeth at the barely-there but still-existent pain. more pumping. the build of pleasure, but faster this time, more intense. your hear the slick, squelching sounds of his fingers in your pussy, and you blush.

his lips are back on yours again, just as insistent. he sucks your bottom lip into his mouth and you gasp as he presses his fingers into you harder, thumb working lazy circles on your clit. you squirm.

"ooh, you like that?" suguru grins. you don't answer, biting your lips to keep back moans. he clicks his tongue. “no, baby, don't keep those precious sounds from me, yeah? come on, good girl.” he whispers huskily into your ear, suddenly curling his finger into you and hitting a spot that makes you see stars.

you yelp, back arching off the sofa, a strangled moan being forced out of your throat. 

"ooh! that's it. I need more from you. can you do that?" he doesn't wait for your response. insistently, his fingers curl inside you, massaging that perfect spot deep inside you and, fuck, you can't help the moans and gasps that tumble out of your lips without permission.

you can't help how good it feels, his fingers stretching you open, slick dripping around his fingers. can't help but think how exquisite it would feel if they were his cock instead. 

you squeeze your eyes shut, back arching against the sofa, with suguru very steadily leading you towards the delicious edge of an orgasm.

“fuck– mmmph! geto, I– ahh!” it hits you like a train. your back arches of the sofa, eyes rolling back in your head from the absolute pleasure. your legs tremble. cunt twitching around his fingers and you try your hardest not to scream.

the pleasure was brain numbing; better than anything that you've ever felt, leaving your body spent and sagging into the sofa, eyes barely able to focus on his lovely face.

it takes every bit of suguru’s self control not to fuck you senseless right then, to lose himself in your tight cunt. instead, he presses his lips on yours, lazily exchanging saliva, and kisses down your body – to your navel, and then–

you jolt, a curse ripping through your throat as a hot, open mouthed kiss is placed on your clit. it startles you, but suguru doesn't give any time to recover, licking and sucking at the little nub like his life depends on it. 

“does that feel good? tell me.” suguru murmurs into your skin. 

unable to form words you moan, running fingers through his thick, black hair. 

“Delicious…” suguru murmurs into the moist flesh, the vibrations going straight to your clit. you almost scream.

suguru geto eats pussy like an expert, his tongue worming his way into you, slurping up your juices wetly like he'd been dehydrated for months. he licks flat-tongued stripes up your clit before sucking it into his mouth, basically playing with it on his tongue.

you're losing it, fingers raking through his dark hair, pressing him into you, legs wrapped tight around his head. you're close; you can practically taste it at this point, with your thigh muscles contracting, stomach clenching. and then–

white.

white and static and the most overwhelming flood of pleasure you've ever felt. it rolls over you in thick, heavy waves, weighing you down and making you practically seize. 

you don't know how long it takes for you to come to your senses. 

by the time you do though, you're at the cusp of another orgasm, suguru still working his ministrations on your clit.

you scream at him to stop. it's too much; you're too sensitive! 

your pleas, however, fall on very deaf ears. he doesn't stop, gripping your hips to keep you in place while he continues. he rolls the tender nub around his tongue like he would a lollipop, and, once more, you're seizing on his tongue.

you black out for longer this time. when you come to, you find suguru looking at you with a mix of fascination and awe, his dark eyes glossy with arousal. his entire upper body is drenched, either with sweat or... something else. it's like someone threw a bucket of water at him.

“more.” he groans, voice husky. “give me more of that.”

before you stutter out denial, his lips are back on your lower ones, tongue-fucking you into ecstasy.

from that point on, you lose track of the number of orgasms you've had that night. all you know is that it was definitely not in the single digits. but the time suguru is done making a meal out of you, you, the couch and suguru are drenched with your bodily fluids. you're also a senseless mess, body still trembling, overstimulated.

suguru kisses up your abdomen, tongue lingering on your nipples before he finally comes up to kiss your forehead.

“I need to- I need to fuck you. you'll let me, won't you?” he questions pleadingly, grinding his erection against your cunt. “pl– fuck– please, I can't go to bed like this.” his eyes are soft, pleading and begging for you. and, fuck, you can't deny him.

suguru wonders why he all of a sudden can't control himself around you. why all he can think about is bottoming out in your warm cunt. it's obviously not the first time he's doing this, definitely not the last… but his cock is the hardest it's ever been, his heart thumping against his ribcage. he chalks it up to the excitement of fucking his best friend's (ex) girlfriend. or maybe the alcohol, though he wasn't one to let something like that affect his judgment. 

but fuck it, whatever. the two of you have gone past the point of no return.

“that's my girl.” he smiles, placing another kiss on your forehead. and then your cheek

you feel the tip of him pressed against you. grunting, he tries to push it in, only for it to slip against your wetness, nudging against your clit.

you whimper at the feeling, heart pounding in your chest.

again, he tries pushing his tip inside you, this time guided by a hand against his pulsing member. it slips inside you with ease and you both moan at the intrusion. 

for you, the pleasure is spiked with pain as his fat cock splits you open at the seams, threatening to unravel you. you hiss and whimper at each inch sliding into you, your pussy pushing him out with each contraction around his dick.

“sh- fuck, you're so fucking tight.” he says through gritted teeth, physical exertion making his muscles tense. “you've gotta loosen up, or i might not pull out in time.”

silently, you wrap your legs around his waist, pulling him closer to you and at the same time making him bottom out. the tip of his cock hits the opening of your cervix and you yelp, pleasure and pain mixing into a hot brew in your stomach and tightening into a cord. 

“...the fuck did that come from?” he groans, voice tight. he rocks his hips into you, gripping your waist tight and hissing. 

you shake your head, unknowing. all you do know is that you need him. right now, as deep inside you as he can go.

had his patience not been worn thin, suguru would have asked you to voice your thoughts. how did it feel? did it hurt? fast or slow? but his cock is so hard and your pussy so tight, his cock might have an aneurysm. he can't even form words to begin with. so he starts with an experimental pace, slow and steady, rocking into you and splitting you open. 

you whine and gasp each time he fully bottoms out into you, the tip of his cock just barely grazing your cervix. the slow pace is exquisite, but you need more. in your current state, you wont accept anything else.

“f– faster, please…” you whine. “harder,”

without hesitation, suguru obliges. for fear of breaking you beyond repair, suguru had started out with a slow, steady pace. however, it seems you didn't want that. and he was grateful. he wasn't sure how much longer he could keep yourself from fucking your pretty pussy senseless.

he does that, hips picking up their pace absolutely fucking the life out of you. the pace he sets makes his hips a blur, his dick reaching places you never knew existed. 

“fuck, you like that? yeah?” 

yeah, you nod as tears spill from your eyes, moans morphing to heavy sobs as the pleasure and slight pain build, heightening to a peak. the cord in your stomach is pulled ridiculously tight, your breathing ragged. 

“fv– fucking– unnghhhhh – ahhhhh—” you say, or rather, try to. it doesn't work out – clearly – your words fucked out of your mouth just as they spill from your lips. 

“trying to say something?” suguru grunts out.

a particularly hard thrust has your barely that there thoughts skittering into nothing with a sharp yelp, back arching off the sofa as you brush dangerously close to your orgasm.

“fuck!–nnn–g–h... fuck– n– m’... m’ gonna cum… shit–” you mumble, eyes rolling back, in your head. your cunt traps suguru in a vice-like grip, your overflowing lubrication the only reason he's able of move properly. he grunts, smashing his lips onto yours and swallowing the sounds coming out of your mouth.

good lord, it feels good. better than anything you've ever had, ever -felt. and holy fuck, you're going to cum. cum yourself unconscious, if you will. it's dangerously close, and you can feel it, creeping up to you, making the edges of your body tingle. it's scary, but feels so good.

“go ahead, doll. come for me, yeah? drench this cock with you.” suguru murmurs in your ear, and suddenly, the orgasm takes hold of you, slamming into you with such force, your back arches violently into suguru’s hold. the cord in your tummy snaps and a scream rips through your throat with the sheer force of the pleasure, and white overtakes your vision before it fades to black.

suguru fucks you through your orgasm, threatening to do you through another. your whole body feels like an exposed nerve, and you don't think you've ever felt as close to death as you do now.

your cunt flutters around his cock, and he hisses as his hold on your hip tightens. fuck, you feel like heaven, your cunt so tight, so wet, so, fucking perfect around him. each time he drags himself out of you, the suction draws him back in, and once he's in, you try to push him back out again. he can't explain why, but that feeling is positively exquisite, and God, he loves it.

“fuck!” he exclaims, face buried in your neck. “fuck, im cumming. fuck, I'm– you’ve… you've gotta tell me where you want it.”

you don't need to think much about the answer. inebriated and incredibly horny, a single word comes to mind. “inside– nnngh!” you breathe, your legs weakly tightening around his waist, drawing him closer to you.

“al– hah!– alright. I'm gonna fuckin’... hah, fuck!” he didn't get to complete his sentence, his muscles stretching taut as a white heat spills inside you.

it's enough to send fireworks exploding behind your tightly closed eyes, your orgasm lighting your body on fire with his cum as the catalyst.

“fuck, ahhhh– you feel so fucking good, hah–” suguru groans as he pours himself into you, teeth clamping down on your shoulder and making you scream. 

he finds his hips rocking into yours once more, fucking you through the aftershocks and overstimulation of both your orgasms.

you shake your head, no. no, no, no more, no! you can't cum any more than you have already or you might die. you shake your head as vigorously as you can, the choked out moans tumbling from your mouth neutralizing your denial.

“fuck, im sorry. one more, yeah? one more, just one more, please,” Suguru whispers breathily into your hair, voice trembling from the pleasure. he can barely breathe, his breath catching his lungs from how good he feels and fuck, its not long before another orgasm creeps up on him, looming over him like a disaster.

and he will be one by the time this is over, he's sure. “fuck, yo– you're g'nna make me cum- again, shit–” 

me too. you think just as you black out for good, chased to unconsciousness by a spill of heat.

☆

you're woken up by a sharp pain in your lower abdomen as you try to change position. you groan, eyes fluttering open, and you find that those hurt too. every single inch of your body hurts, some minor, some major, but it kind of feels like you got into mini car accident. God, and you had an awful sore throat.

at the feel of sheets on your once bare skin, you sit up, realizing that you’re no longer on the couch.

judging from the scent of the room, or the lack thereof, you guess that you’re in suguru’s room. though the sliver of light though the curtains, you can see that it's organised perfectly. 

groaning, you swing your legs over the side of the bed and stand up, trying your best to maintain balance, ignoring the burn of your inner thigh and abdominal muscles, then you walk out of the room, to the kitchen.

the room is an assault of light to your poor eyes and you wince, squinting. vaguely, you can see Suguru standing in front of the kitchen stove. whatever he’s cooking up smells pretty good.

“hi, Suguru.” you say, smiling, walking towards him. the warmth in your face freezes as your eyes catch another person in the room. Gojo. he's sitting on a chair by the kitchen island, typing away at his phone. “hi Satoru.”

he looks up, startled, then confused at your dishevelled appearance. you’d forgotten you wouldn't look the best after last night. “oh. I didn't know you were here.” he says.

“she stopped by last night. good morning.” suguru smiles back at  you, handing you a plate of food. “you'll find some painkillers on the side table in my room. you'll probably need them after last night. and tea for your throat.” he says and you blush at the memory and nod. 

Gojo watches the exchange silently, a pale white brow cocked. “what happened last night?” he questions and Suguru throws him what might have been a glare.

in response to Satoru's question, you shrug. “uh, nothing. I stopped by in the rain and asked for some alcohol to keep warm. I ended up taking a bit too much.” you pop a piece of bacon in your mouth.

“and that explains the bruises on your neck?” he asks and you freeze, heart thumping. then you swallow, making yourself remember that Gojo was also a shitty cheater. it cancels out.

“yeah.”

he coughs out a laugh, bright blue eyes hardening to sapphires. “bullshit.” he says and turns to suguru. “did you fuck her?”

he shrugs, turning off the stove and sliding a plate of food towards gojo.

“what the fuck, Suguru? why would you do that?” he yells, face paling. “you're my fucking best friend, why the fuck would you fuck my girlfriend?”

“ex girlfriend.” you step in instead, voice bleeding with anger and that shuts Gojo up. “sorry, I forgot you were the only one who could cheat.”

satoru, about to open a drawer to pick up a fork, pauses and turns to look at you with an unreadable expression.

“you thought I wouldn't figure it out? you're very bad at keeping secrets.” another peice of bacon in your mouth. suguru hands you a cup of lemon tea. “I actually stopped by yesterday to break up with you. but it seems you'd told your roommate you'd be out with me. why? when you'd told me that you'd be at home having a games night with suguru.”

“that was the plan, but I stepped out.” gojo says, the ice in his eyes reflecting in his voice.

you flinch, but hold your ground. “stepped out for the whole night?”

“I got caught in the rain.”

“which stopped before I went to bed.” 

a rushed breath of air leaves Suguru's mouth as laughter. you roll your eyes. “more like blacked out.” he says under his breath. Gojo's eyes dart to him, then you.

“I… stayed over at a friend's house.” he says carefully. 

“which friend?” 

he pauses, eyes cloudy with thought. “...you won't know them.”

“we share friendship circles. whoever I haven't met, at least I've heard of.” you drum a nail on the table, patience wearing to the width of papyrus paper. he's wasting time with his lies.

“she's–” he starts, and catches himself. your eyes narrow. “they're not from our circle. I met them at a party. I don't have to tell you about every single person I befriend.”

“befriend and fuck.” 

“I didn't fuck her!” Gojo slams his hand on the table in outrage.

“the used condom back at my apartment. was that me? did I use that? the cum stains on my bed–” you scrunch up your face in disgust. “--that was me, right? I grew a dick overnight. stop lying, it doesn't suit you.”

he doesn't have anything to say in return and neither do you. “I'm breaking up with you.”

[shalotttower]

Equations

Title: Equations Characters: L Lawliet x Reader (female) Summary: A short snippet of Reader and L moving places. Probably can be counted as imagine. Word count: 990+ Notes: yandere L, kidnapped Reader, captivity, L and Reader were together at Wammy's House, Stockholm Syndrome, L is being a shithead gremlin.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it keeps no record of wrongs.

You're not religious at all, but those words glimpsed once on a bookshop wall stuck in your mind when Wammy's House stayed behind, somewhere in-between the pages of your journal, so carelessly flipped through by a boy with a blank expression, who had and still has no idea what those verses mean.

"What is it?" you ask, when Watari enters your room with a suitcase.

"We're leaving in an hour," he says. "Get ready, please."

You don't argue.

L doesn't have many rules, and most of those existing are unspoken. Some can be bent, some can be bargained and twisted into an illusion of freedom until it snaps. But if Watari comes in and tells you to get ready, you obey. It means you're moving somewhere else, another place unknown. So you pack: clothes, shoes (just two pairs, there's nowhere to wear them anyway), hygiene necessities which fit neatly inside one single bag.

When you get in the car, L is already there, looking through the window. The glass tints everything a tone darker.

Watari starts driving.

The first time you used it as a chance to understand where you were, memorize the road signs, the turns. By the eleventh you stopped caring, because it didn't really matter ─ even if the whole world map was imprinted inside your head, what would it do?

So you lean against the seat and watch the cows in the pasture on the right. Everything is green and yellow outside. Some rural town probably ─ a happy little world tucked away. A small part of you wishes to exit this car right here and now, just to see what happens. Intrusive thoughts are like that sometimes. They pop up and disappear without a reason or logic behind.

The sun is bright.

There's a church up ahead, with freshly painted doors and windows which have a stained glass pattern of white lilies among golden rays of light. A beautiful work of art put onto display for whoever cares enough to look.

You wonder: if God existed, what would he think of L's fingers curling over yours. The touch is barely there at all, yet you feel it down to your bones.

Love is patient, love is kind. His thumb brushes over your knuckles.

"What are you doing," you ask flatly, not expecting a reply. It's a reflex, like the knee jerk reaction, to ask him questions, because otherwise who knows what's there in that shaggy-haired head of his.

"Holding your hand," L says.

"I can see that. Why?"

"Why not?"

"That's not an answer."

"Then ask a better question."

You turn to look at him and immediately regret doing so, because his eyes are wide and focused, and you can see your own face reflected there. Between his bony fingers and yours are lifelines crisscrossed together by a forceful hand.

"Stop that," you tell him without much heat behind.

L doesn't look away, nor does he stop staring.

"Stop what?"

"That."

"If I knew what you're referring to, I'd probably have better chances of stopping it."

L tilts his head to the side. So that's what it is. One of those times when he feels a tad more playful, a bit more nagging, and tries to drag you into a verbal game that doesn't end until you surrender and let him have his way.

The church is long gone by now, and the cows too. Just empty space surrounded by trees which line up along the sides of the road.

You wish you were tired enough to nap through the rest of the ride, but since Watari brought a humidifier for your room, your night sleep has never been better. That leaves reading, and you pull an e-book from your bag to continue the novel started a few days ago.

You feel his head lean closer to your shoulder halfway through chapter six. His hair has grown a bit and tickles.

"Find your own book," you murmur and flip to the next page.

L hums and stays in place.

Ten minutes pass, then fifteen, he doesn't move and you wonder ─ when. His fingers are linked loosely with yours and you haven't tried to pry them off yet. Why haven't you?

When did you start tolerating his presence to this extent?

It's quiet save for the tires noise. Your index finger taps a pattern against the screen. Tap-tap-tap.

"The killer is-" L begins right when you get to the chapter nine.

"-male-" he continues despite your elbow hitting his side.

"-mid-thirties, dark hair-"

You slam your palm over his mouth, and the e-book falls from your lap onto the car floor. L blinks once before licking your hand like he's five years old instead of twenty three stepping into twenty four. You yelp and wipe it off against your jeans while Watari coughs in the front seat.

"You-" you catch yourself mid-sentence, then take a deep breath. "I would appreciate if you didn't spoil the books I'm currently reading."

Or movies you're watching; or games you play; or anything at all really whenever it catches your attention long enough to become invested. He doesn't do it often when he's on a case, but off those L tends to get very bored very quickly and finds entertainment in your reactions.

His lips twitch, and you know 100% percent that he's going to do it again until you give up on reading altogether and spend the rest of the ride talking to him instead, though "talking" is a loose term here. More like indulging whatever topic L decides to fixate on this time around, because if you ignore him, he will be just as content with staring at you for hours on end with nothing but silence between you both.

[thatlotuscookie]

Hi! Could you write a BNHA Dabi x Female Reader? Something short and simple where Dabi comes home after a mission, all burnt out and exhausted, and the reader helps him unwind, taking care of his burns and just giving him a bit of comfort. I'd love to see that softer side of him! Thank you!

✧･ﾟ: a/n : thank you for the request, anon! this is totally how Dabi would act after a tough mission. It’s always satisfying to see him drop that hard exterior just a little bit when he’s around someone he trusts. hope you guys enjoy this one!

✧ Title: ✧ Worn Down ✧ ✧ Characters: Dabi x Female Reader ✧ Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Light Angst ✧ Rating: T ✧ Summary: Dabi comes home from a brutal mission, exhaustion weighing him down like never before. You try to get him to take it easy, offering the care and softness he never admits he needs. He doesn’t have to pretend with you. ✧ Content Warnings: Mentions of overexertion, exhaustion, caretaking, mild vulnerability, !soft Dabi ✧ WC: 784 words // 4307 chars

The door creaked open, and the sound of heavy, sluggish footsteps filled the quiet apartment. You looked up from the book you were reading, seeing Dabi step inside, his silhouette outlined by the dim light of the hallway.

But as he made his way into the room, you couldn’t help but notice how worn-out he looked. His usual swagger was replaced by slow, uneven movements, his shoulders slumped under the weight of exhaustion. The mission must have been brutal.

Dabi didn’t say a word as he dropped onto the couch beside you, his head falling back against the cushion, eyes closed in clear frustration. His chest rose and fell with deep, ragged breaths as if every inhale took more effort than the last.

"Dabi…" you murmured, worry threading through your voice as you reached out to gently touch his arm. His body tensed under your fingers, but he didn’t pull away, didn’t brush you off like he usually did. That alone told you how drained he really was.

"I'm fine," he grunted, though the tightness in his jaw betrayed him. It was the same line he always threw out when he didn’t want to admit he was hurting. But you knew him well enough by now to see through it.

"You don’t look fine," you said softly, sitting up straighter as you studied him. His skin was slick with sweat, and his muscles were still trembling slightly, likely from the strain of overusing his quirk. Even someone like him, with all his power, had limits.

Dabi huffed, his lips pulling into a weak, half-hearted smirk. "Overdid it, that’s all."

You frowned, your hand moving to gently rub his back. "You always overdo it."

He didn’t respond to that, just let out a long, tired exhale as he leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees as he buried his face in his hands. His usual cocky exterior had cracked, leaving behind the raw, vulnerable man underneath—the one who pushed himself too hard, too often, just to prove a point to a world that had already turned its back on him.

Wordlessly, you stood up and disappeared into the kitchen, grabbing a cold bottle of water from the fridge. When you returned, you handed it to him, and he took it without a word, the faintest hint of gratitude flickering in his tired eyes.

"You need to take it easy sometimes," you whispered, sitting down beside him again, your hand resting on his thigh. "You can’t keep going like this."

Dabi unscrewed the cap and took a long drink, his throat working as he swallowed. For a moment, he didn’t say anything, just stared down at the bottle in his hand as if it held all the answers he was too stubborn to ask for.

"I’ve got things to do," he muttered after a beat, though there was no real fire in his voice. He was too tired to fight you on this.

"You’ve done enough for one night," you replied gently, your thumb brushing soothing circles on his leg. "Let me take care of you for once."

Dabi snorted, but there was no edge to it. His hand came up to rub the back of his neck, the tension in his shoulders still painfully obvious. "You’re too soft for this life," he said, though the words lacked their usual bite.

You just smiled softly, knowing it was his way of deflecting. “Maybe. But you need someone to be soft for you.”

He let out a long, frustrated sigh but didn’t protest when you shifted closer, your hand moving to his hair, gently combing through the dark strands. It was something that always seemed to calm him, though he’d never admit it.

For a while, the two of you sat in comfortable silence, your fingers trailing through his hair as he leaned back against the couch, finally letting his body relax. His breathing slowed, and for the first time that night, he looked almost peaceful—like the weight of everything he carried had finally lightened, if only for a little while.

“You’re gonna spoil me if you keep this up,” he muttered, his voice low and rough from exhaustion.

You chuckled softly, leaning down to press a gentle kiss to his temple. “You deserve to be spoiled a little.”

For a moment, Dabi didn’t respond, but as the silence stretched between you, you noticed the way his body sagged further into the couch, his defenses crumbling just a little more. He let his head fall against your shoulder, and though he didn’t say it out loud, you could feel the unspoken gratitude in the way he leaned into your touch.

He didn’t have to pretend with you.

[chaotic-mystery]

Code Red | Chapter Seven: I Love Older Men

pairing: dbf!Joel Miller x f!reader (no outbreak)

summary: Your big date with Joel is finally here and you end the night on a good note, or a good feeling perhaps.

content warnings: SMUT, 18+ only blog MDNI. Enemies to lovers, dads best friend Joel, age gap (readers in her twenties and Joel is in his 40s), slow burn, first date jitters, reader has hair Joel can brush from her face, no other descriptors, Joel puts reader on the dining table, finally getting some smut, eh? oral sex (f receiving bc he's a ladies man), orgasm denial until you agree with him, power imbalance, dirty talk, thigh smacking, biting, a few sips of beer but no one is buzzed, horny overload, cum eating if you use a monocle, pulling Joel's hair and riding his face/nose, slight PDA, a tiny easter egg if you find it, and one (1) sleepover. NO use of Y/N! Let me know if I've missed something!

authors note: Hi, I love you first off for keeping up with this and my life when it gets crazy and I dip for a little. Thank you for all the support on Code Red, it means the world to me. This can be read as a stand alone if you're unfamiliar with the series but it'll make more sense reading it in order || wc: 4K || notif blog so you don't miss a thing ||

“Why do you have to wear that shirt?” Joel asks as your front door swings open, his hand pushed against the door jam to prop him up. 

You giggle and look down at the bedazzled shirt that was tight enough to push your tits together nicely. It came as no surprise to you that Joel didn’t like the words printed on it and covered in rhinestones. ‘I Love Older Men’ twinkles in the sunlight as Joel swings open your front door, already taking your house key to lock the door behind you. 

“It’s not funny, you’re gonna draw attention to us.” He gripes, putting a hand on your hip behind you as you sit down. His attitude was already starting to get on your nerves but you refuse to let him ruin this, especially over a shirt. 

“Hey! Enough, it’s just a shirt. Is it really such a bad thing if people look at us?” You ask, dipping your head down to look at him. 

Joel meets your eyes and licks his lips while thinking about what to say. You cup his cheek and raise your eyebrows at him playfully. 

“No, I just-” He starts and you cover his mouth quickly to cut him off. Joel gets the hint and rolls his eyes at you before closing the door shut and getting in on his side of the truck. He starts the engine and puts his hand on the back of your headrest to back out of his driveway, open palm against the steering wheel turning it quickly. 

His cologne smells warm and spicy, with a tad of amber mixed in there which surprises you for someone like him, not seeming like he’d be into expensive cologne.  Absolutely captivating, the way he does everything so effortlessly and somehow makes you want to bury your face in his chest while he talks for hours and hours. Joel turns forward and starts the long drive ahead of you two. You were unsure where your date actually was, Joel wanted to keep it a surprise from the last time you spoke about it, which you didn’t mind in the slightest. 

Joel looks over a couple of times and leans his arm against the door while he steers the wheel. 

“You gonna stay over there the whole time or you wanna sit in the middle?” He asks, almost waiting for you to laugh and tell him no. You fight back a smirk and sigh dramatically before sliding over into the middle seat right next to him. 

“Better?”

“For now.” Joel responds and his tongue lingers over his bottom lip for a split second before disappearing into his mouth again. 

“Where are we going? Please don’t tell me you’re taking me to Home Depot…Joel are you taking us to Home Depot?” You half whine and look up at him with your hand resting on his knee. 

“Now why on earth would you think I'd take you there for our date? Give me a little more credit, would ya? Just sit back and enjoy the ride please?” His arm tightens around your shoulders and pulls you into him more. You giggle at his growing annoyance and put your sunglasses on as you rest your head back, looking out the window watching the telephone poles whiz by. 

One of the few times you ever felt this calm and relaxed was with Joel or when you’re alone. He makes it so easy to forget all of the stress and the issues constantly circling your brain about your dad, the future of not knowing, everything that bothers you. None of it ever seems that important when you’re with Joel. 

You two hum to the radio and talk here and there, mainly enjoying the comfortable silence you shared. He turns right and the sign for the aquarium starts to get closer. 

“You remembered the aquarium? Oh my god, Joel!” You exclaim and sit straight up to see the view better. Your excitement was too much for you to notice Joel taking glances at you with the biggest smile on your face. It was apparent to him you thought he forgot about the aquarium comment you made months ago. Little did you know he bought tickets as soon as you mentioned it that day. Even if you went just as the weird friend dynamic you briefly were, Joel still would’ve loved it no matter how much he would’ve pretended not to, no matter how much he wants to deny it.

He pulls into the parking lot and finds a parking spot a little far away from the doors but neither one of you mind. With your purse on your arm, you climb out of his truck and stand in front of it while you wait impatiently for him to get out. 

“You ready?” He asks, coming up right next to you. His finger hooks under your chin and brushes his thumb down softly as he gives you a smile. 

“Absolutely.” You respond back.

You two start towards the door, his arm brushing against you every time he gets close. Every time you feel his pinky touch your hand, you want to just reach out and hold his hand. Joel being the brooding older man, he’s not too big on PDA. You were the exact opposite. You wanted the whole entire town to know you were dating Joel Miller, you wanted to hold his hand while you wore your silly little shirt and have everyone stare at you both, like they could even begin to know the situation. 

When you get inside and turn in your tickets, Joel watches the glimmer in your eyes sparkle as you take in everything around you. The tanks full to the brim with fish and coral, touch tanks tucked back behind the glass and metal staircase leading upstairs, the glowing hallway leading to so much more, the gift shop you were definitely going to stop in before leaving. In awe at the artwork covering almost every inch of wallspace, you were mesmerized. Two children run in front of you and scream wildly as they chase each other, causing Joel to grab your hand instinctively and pull you out of the way before someone gets stepped on. 

You look down and his fingers interlock with yours and neither of you say a word or pull away. 

“Where to first, baby?”

-

Hours pass and your feet are starting to hurt but you’re having too much of a good time to admit to Joel he was right about your shoe choice being awful. It was absolutely worth the pain though, walking the entire aquarium to get the full experience. Joel didn’t complain once no matter how many times you got weird looks for your shirt. He’d walk up to the dolphin tank and put his on the glass, the same glimmer in your eye from when you arrived was the same one he had.  You two end up in front of the jellyfish tank  that went up to the ceiling with glass, blobs of pink and orange jellyfish floating up and down all over the tank. Joel takes a seat on the bench in front and leans his arms against his thighs as he watches closely. 

You sit next to him and rest your head on his shoulder, admiring the pink jellyfish at the very top that keeps sinking to the bottom just to go straight back up. 

“Did you have a fun time?” Joel asks.

You don’t answer right away to not seem eager. “Yeah, this was a lot of fun. Never a dull moment with you though.” You giggle quietly as you remember earlier when he made someone’s child cry because Joel apparently “took the stingray” the child was touching and it decided to swim to Joel’s hand you forced into the touch tank. You’ve never seen him move so fast until that moment.

Joel chuckles with you as he knows exactly what you’re thinking about. 

“I told you not to make me do it and you see what you did? You made someone's child cry, they’re never gonna come back here now.” Joel can’t finish his sentence because you both are laughing so hard and he leans his head on yours. 

There wasn’t that need to fill the silence with Joel. You could sit there with him for hours and not share a word and still be comfortable, that’s not something you come by everyday. 

“Well, you wanna stop in the gift shop before we go?” Joel questions as he picks his head up off yours. 

“Yeah! I wanna see what stupid thing I can convince you to buy me.” You jump up and step towards the tank a few times, turning around to look at Joel. 

He rises to his feet and walks towards you slowly, head cocked back slightly. The look he’s giving you makes your heart start to race and you can feel your cheeks getting warm with every step closer he gets to you. Somehow you managed to be the only two people in the jellyfish exhibit and you were thanking your lucky stars for this. 

“Convince me, huh? Convince me how, baby?” His mocking tone sets your body on fire and you suddenly can’t speak. 

Joel gets right in front of you and tucks his hand against your cheek, his long fingers brushing softly on the skin right below your ear. 

“You don’t have to convince me to do anything, sweetheart. I’d do anything you want.”  He kisses your lips gently.

“I’d buy you anything you want.” He kisses your jaw.

“I’d build you anything you want.” He kisses your neck softly. 

You would’ve fallen to your knees had he not pulled away and chuckled at you, seeing how pathetic he made you for him so fast. 

“Fuck off, Joel.” You try to play it off like you weren’t going to risk it all had he kept going. 

He takes your hand once more and walks with you to the gift shop, his hand hardly leaving your waist as you meander around the store.

Torn between the pack of pens with different aquatic animals on the top and a turtle shaped beanie, you asked Joel which one you should get. 

Joel turns around from the little container of pins he was looking at and takes a good glance at the options. 

“What about this?” He holds up the metal pin that has a starfish printed on the center, with big ugly yellow letters that say, ‘I’m a star!’. 

You blink once at him and turn back around to hide your laugh. 

“That’s so goddamn stupid, Joel. I’d hate to be called a starfish.” You put the hat back and just as you look up, you see it. The stupid thing you want Joel to get you. 

Yanking the clownfish plush off the shelf, you grin widely and turn back around to him and shake it in his face.

“This, this is it. Isn’t it the cutest thing you’ve ever seen?” You look back down at the stuffed animal, admiring all the details on it. Without missing a beat, Joel doesn’t look away from you and nods. “Yeah, it is.” 

-

On the drive home you stopped for food and ate in the parking lot while Joel gave you his typical old man history recap of all things Austin, Texas while you nodded like you were following the entire time. You caught most of it, but some stuff you were lost about and you didn’t have the heart to make him explain. Nodding and smiling usually did the trick.

Joel pulls into his driveway and stops right next to the little light pole on your side so you can see where you’re walking. Joel gets out after turning it off  and walks around the front of the truck to meet you halfway. With an arm stretched out towards you, he grabs it and holds it there for a moment. 

“Do you wanna maybe, um…see the new curtains I put up the other day?”

Your brows furrow and you can feel a laugh building up inside. 

“W-what? Are you inviting me in to look at your curtains?” You have to make sure you heard him correctly. This seems like Joel’s way of getting you inside but he won’t explicitly say it. He needs an innocent excuse to get you inside before he makes his move. 

He scratches the back of his head awkwardly and turns away causing his bicep to come into the light and grab your eyes. 

“Yeah, I am.” He refuses to elaborate or change his question to the truth, curtains is what he’s sticking with. 

“Well let’s go, Mr. Miller.” you reach up and pat his chest before heading towards his front door. 

“C’mon, you know I hate when you call me that.”

“I know, that’s why I love it.” 

He stands close enough behind you that you can feel his chest on your back while he unlocks the front door.

“Such a brat.”

The door swings wide open and you’re hit with the familiar smell that is Joel. The cologne with the faint scent of laundry detergent and somewhere a reed diffuser sitting neatly on a table. You take in all of the photos on the walls of him and Sarah, the home looking lived in and not empty. This is what you’ve been waiting on ever since you moved in. You wanted to see inside this house so badly. To see the room you’d constantly look down to when you couldn’t sleep and needed someone but he wasn’t awake. To see the room where you could hear every argument he had with Michelle over you. 

“Everything you thought it’d be in here?” Joel questions and walks from behind you to the stainless steel fridge in the next room over as you stand in the doorway of the living room. 

“It’s so cozy in here, I didn’t think it would be. Figured you’d have a lawn chair in here with a fold up table or something.” You joke and turn around with your arms crossed over your chest. 

Joel looks at you with a fake disappointed face and closes the fridge before grabbing the two beers off the counter he got out. 

“Don’t be a smartass, or I’ll have to fix that for you.” Joel states firmly, standing right next to you.”

With your breath caught in your throat, you take the beer from his hand hesitantly and think about whether or not you should say what you’re thinking. Fuck it though, right?

“Fix it how, Mr. Miller?” The playful tone in your voice makes Joel turn slowly towards you and sucks his teeth quickly before setting his beer down on the coffee table to the left of him. 

“What’d I say about calling me that. You just love to push my buttons don’t you? Gets you off knowing you’ve annoyed me for the day, huh?” 

You take another sip of your beer and smirk against the bottle. 

“Yeah, I do.” You answer confidently.

Joel’s strong arms wrap around you and tug you close against him which causes you both to grunt and he holds you there, his face inches away from yours. 

“And what if I told you every time you do that you make me wanna bend you over and have my way with you until you say you’re sorry?” 

There it is. 

You shutter a breath and meet his eyes which don’t seem so brown anymore. They’re dark with lust and it’s the one thing you’ve been wanting to see from him. 

“Doubt it, I don’t think you can break me.” 

Your lips ghost over his before they crash together and he groans in your mouth instantly as he picks you up for just a moment and walks you over to the dining room, setting you at the end of the table. You swing your legs as he steps back and admires how you look with the dim lighting around you. 

“You would want that, of course. Should’ve known you’re a dirty girl. Tell me how you want me, baby.” He leans in and holds the back of your neck as he trails kisses along your jaw and throat, trying to make you respond. 

The harsh but passionate kisses cloud your mind and you can’t answer fast enough. 

“Tell me pretty girl, tell me how I can make you feel so good and have you right where I want you.” 

God, you need him so badly. 

“I-I like it rough. Manhandle me but still make me feel wanted, like you can’t get enough of me.” 

Your answer coaxes out a groan from Joel and you can’t help but smirk. 

“Oh is that so? You want me to toss you around, maybe pin you down right here and give you that attitude adjustment I’ve been wanting to give you since I saw you on your dads porch?” Joel did one thing well, and it’s being condescending. 

He lays you down on the wooden table and pulls his hand out from the back of your neck and down the middle of your breasts slowly, all the way to the top of your pants. A scoff comes from his mouth and he tugs on the belt loop near your button. 

“‘I love older men’...so fuckin’ naughty. Have you ever been with one or are you just talkin’ a big game?” 

Joel undoes the button on your pants and wiggles his thick pointer finger inside the waistband of your panties, smoothing over your skin teasingly.

“N-no, I haven’t been with one yet.”

“Perfect. Now, take these off.” He yanks on your pants and stands still between your legs while you lift your hips up to shimmy them off. Halfway down your legs he grows impatient and shucks them off you, tossing them onto the floor. Joel kneels down and his face is dangerously close to your aching cunt. 

“Joel, please- I need you…I need you so damn bad.” You whine, grabbing at his hand that’s holding your waist. 

“You need me to what, baby? Use your words, I know you can do it.” He mocks. 

Colored embarrassed that he was wanting you to explicitly say you want him to eat your pussy was an understatement. You didn’t mind a challenge. 

“I want you to lick my pussy, Joel. I wanna feel your tongue on me and make me scream because you do it so well.” As soon as the words leave your lips, his tongue is licking at your wet panties. Tasting every bit of excitement he got from you until you whimper for him to do more. 

“You want me to show you what I can do, pretty girl?” 

Joel doesn’t wait for your answer and he grabs your hand, hooking your panties on your fingers to have you hold them to the side.

“Be a good girl and hold these for me, yeah?” 

You nod in response and close your eyes just in time for his warm tongue to flatten against your clit. His moans muffle against your folds as his hands grip your hips harder, pulling you close to his face as he laps at your soaking pussy. Quick and rough flicks from his tongue go against your clit and you can already feel your legs shake. Your back arches off the table and instantly your hand goes in his hair, gripping the salt and pepper little curls tightly. 

“Ohhh my-fucking god, Joellll!” You cry out and his right hand leaves your hip to the middle of your torso to pin you back down. 

“Stay still.” He commands and buries his face between your thighs, his beautiful nose bumping your 

clit. Your eyes begin to roll back into your skull and he groans louder the harder he licks at you, tasting every inch of skin he can get his mouth on. Joel rubs his thumb over your clit as he bites your thighs and follows with a soft slap to see how far he can push you. 

“Y-yes oh keep doing that, baby.” You whine and buck your hips to get more friction against his thumb. 

“So eager for me to make you come, darlin. God you’re gonna fuckin’ kill me.” Joel growls out and takes his thumb off you for a moment and your eyes shoot open to see where the release you were needing, had gone. He admires the glistening slick coating his skin and licks it clean before connecting his tongue with your clit once more. 

“Say yes and I’ll let you come, okay?” Joel groans between licks and looks you in the eyes. 

You sit up more to look at him with a confused look on your face. 

“Say yes to w-what?” 

“Come work for me at my shop. Be my receptionist so I can see you all the time. I can’t fucking be apart from you all day anymore.” His licks get more passionate and fast, consistent against your overworked clit and you feel the pressure starting to build in the pit of your stomach. 

“What? Y-you want me-fuccck-to work with you?” you barely whimper out as you begin to pant and grind against his face.

Why did he want to bring this up right now? Was he afraid you’d say no so he waited until he had you in the palm of his hand to ask? Jokes on him, you wouldn’t have turned that down at all, anything to see him more than you were now, and you’d be getting paid to fuck off all day with him?

“Say yes.” He grunts and keeps going, pushing you to the edge of your orgasm. 

Your eyes close and your head falls back, moaning with every lick and every move of your hips you make against him. 

“Yes yes yes yes yes okay I will.” You squeak out and you come on his face, riding his tongue as you end up spacing out from the euphoric high. Never has a man ever made your ears ring from coming, until tonight. 

Joel gives your pussy sensual kisses before he trails them up your stomach until he gets to your lips. You kiss him eagerly and taste yourself on his tongue, already wanting more. 

“So I’ll see you there, Monday morning at 10 a.m..” He chuckles and kisses you a few more times before standing straight up and admiring the work he did on you. 

All spread out on the dining room table wasn’t how you saw tonight ending, but you got so much from today. A great date and a job, and head? You were a winner today. 

He grabs your hand and helps you up slowly, adjusting your panties the way he found them. You smile at him and look around for your jeans, groaning at the thought of putting them back on. 

“Hold on, stay there.” Joel says and he disappears around the corner to another room. He comes back with a pair of basketball shorts and hands them to you. 

“Here, put these on, baby.”  

Fresh warm shorts from the dryer. What a fucking gentleman. You put them on and get a chill immediately from how warm they are. 

“Can we watch a movie before I go home maybe?” You ask, not ready to leave his house quite yet. Joel nods and sits on the couch and you follow suit, cuddling yourself into his side. He finds something to watch on a streaming service and kisses your forehead. 

“Don’t fall asleep now, I can’t carry you to your house.” He jokes and you elbow his side playfully. 

Soon the TV sound was getting quieter and quieter as your eyes got heavy, until you were completely passed out in Joel’s arms, with him dozing off himself. Trying to fight his sleep to stay awake, he only lasts about ten more minutes before he grabs a blanket from the chair, covering you both up to sleep. 

[beccarodeupontheafternoontrain]

Guest in the Relationship part 2

Damian Wayne x reader

Words: 1789

Summary: Damian keeps forgetting about your dates and this night is the final straw

Warnings: unedited, angst?

Part 1

I hope you guys enjoy the second and final part - I tried my best. Any criticism is welcomed as are any ideas for further stories :)

Worried was an understatement. I hadn't heard from Damian in a week. Jon hadn't heard from Damian in a week. None of your mutual friends had heard from Damian in a week.

Monday morning I walked into Gotham Academy expecting to see Damian in his normal seat next to mine. It would be awkward, I still wasn't sure what I wanted to say to him or what I wanted to do about the situation. He'd been lying to me for years both as Damian and as Robin and I had every right to be angry about it. Eventually we would talk - how the conversation would end depended on if I was hurt by his lying or angry. What I hadn't expected was for him to not show up at all.

I was too stubborn to text him. He'd been active on his social media, so I knew he wasn't dead, he just didn't want to see me. I could understand why, I hadn't been the most reasonable when he revealed his secret identity to me. However, my apprehension over his disappearance was growing. I was walking around with a knife in gut every time I entered a classroom and he wasn't also in it.

Robin had also been missing. The Gazette's headlines questioning why he'd gone into hiding. I think I might just be the only person who knew the real reason the bird hero wasn't aiding Batman the past few nights.

I'd finally given in to my anxiety. After pacing outside the front steps for far too long, so long that Alfred definitely knew I was there and was just being polite by waiting for me to announce my arrival - I pressed the doorbell to Wayne Manor. I needed to find out for myself if Damian was okay and I needed to talk to him about our situation. As much as I preferred to wrap myself in his clothes and cuddle my wolf, pretending everything was okay with the world. I couldn't do that anymore. Mostly because his hoodie had stopped smelling like him.

Alfred opened the door practically immediately and said my name, he'd definitely been waiting since I arrived 20 minutes ago. "How may I help you?" His voice was as always, polite and soft, I hoped this meant Damian didn't hate me as much as I feared. "I'm here to see Damian." Alfred opened the door wider for me to enter, still not sign of hostility upon his face. "Master Damian is in the music room." I thanked Alfred and headed towards the music room. I knew exactly where it was. It was my second favourite room in Wayne Manor, the first obviously being the library with its mass amount of books. The music room was on the same corridor as Damian's room, it had dark wood floors like the rest of the house with matching wood panelling covering the wall half way and green Victorian style wallpaper covering the rest. In front of the window lived a grand piano, which I had never seen played and throughout the room is an abundance of instruments, ranging from a drum kit to a harp. I found Damian in the corner of the room playing Clair de Lune on his violin, facing away from the sofa that had been placed in here just for me to watch Damian practice. Keeping my steps as quiet as possible I settled down in my usual spot, wrapping my blanket around myself. The Manor was always fairly cold due to its size so Damian had started to keep blankets around the house in rooms we frequented to avoid me catching a chill.

Damian was beautiful when he played violin. If I had any artistic abilities, drawing Damian playing his violin would probably take up the majority of my sketches. The way he played his violin was a dance, it was so practiced and so precise, but he looked so free while doing it. Playing the violin was when Damian was at his calmest. Especially when I curled up on the sofa and watched him play for hours, Damian once said that was when he was happiest.

Part of me was glad Damian had been so focused on his music that he hadn't heard me come in, but the other part knew I couldn't just sit here in silence, I had to make my presence known and get this conversation over with. I waited till he played the last note before I called his name. He spun around so quickly it was almost comical, my name a whisper on his lips. "Hi." I said, an awkward smile on my face. The plan of everything I was supposed to say to the boy in front of me now vanished from my head. "Hi." He replied while scratching the back of his neck, he always does that when he's unsure of something. I take a deep breath before saying "you haven't been at school and neither Jon nor I had heard from you, I just wanted to see if you were okay." Damien looked away from me before responding "I'm okay." I rolled my eyes, did this boy ever tell me the truth? "Damien" I said more angrily than I intended "I need you to tell me the truth for once." He opened his lips to defend himself, but I cut him off. "Sit down so we can talk properly."

My body ached at the distance he placed between us by sitting on the opposite side of the sofa. Damian looked at me terrified, like he was scared I would hurt him. I really hoped this conversation wouldn’t go there. I cleared my throat “I’m not sure where to start” my hands begin to look more interesting than Damian’s face for the first time since I’ve known him. “I guess I just want to know why you lied.” A long sigh escaped him “I couldn’t tell you my identity because I need to protect you, knowing that I’m Robin puts both of us at risk, but especially you.” I looked at my boyfriend, or I assumed still was, in disbelief. He thought I was mad about him not telling me he was Robin? Sure, it stung a little that he hadn’t told me sooner, but I understood why. “I don’t care that you didn’t tell me you were Robin, I want to know why you came to me as Robin, pretended like you didn’t know who I was and have kept that act up for years.” Damian isn’t one for showing his emotions, not to other people at least, but how stunned he was painted his face. He stumbled over the beginning of his sentence, so I butted in again. “Me knowing you’re Robin also doesn’t make up for all the missed dates and unanswered texts, even if you’re a superhero I deserve the bare minimum.” This just causes Damian to act even more panicked, the back of his neck being scratched raw. He takes a deep breath and then another before he spoke. “I’m sorry.” I finally look up at his face. “I never intended to hurt you in this way, or any way at all. When I was on patrol I can’t help but spend extra time in your area, I need to ensure you’re safe. Your safety is my priority, the idea of anything happening to you-” Damian’s hands form fists while his jaw clenches as he glances at the healing cut on my neck from my attacker. I can’t help but place a reassuring hand atop his. “Whenever I see you when I’m Robin” he continues “I can’t hold myself back from talking to you. I just want to spend all of my time in your presence, even if it is as Robin. I know it was wrong to pretend I was someone else, but I just couldn’t help myself from you.” I nod my head “okay.”

Damian smiles at me, hesitantly. “Okay?” He manoeuvres our hands so he’s now holding mine. His green eyes carry so much hope “does this mean we’re going to be okay?” I have to remove my hands from his, the smile vanishes as does the hope in his eyes. “Not just yet.” I say “just because you’ve apologised for lying to me doesn’t expunge your lying nor does it remove how you’ve made me feel so alone and unwanted throughout this relationship.” Damian looked like a kicked puppy. “I don’t know how to make you feel that I love you. Knowing you don’t feel how much I care for you and want you in my life physically pains me.” He cups my cheeks and makes me look at him in the eyes. “I love you Habibti. I love you so much and I don’t know how to make any of this up to you, but I will figure it out. I do not want to lose you.” I can feel the burn behind my eyes as they become glossy. “I don’t want to lose you either, but I also don’t know how we can get past this if I continue to feel like you don’t want me around.” Damian nods his head as he deliberates his next words, his thumb starts drawing circles on my cheek. “How about you tell me what you need from me, how do you want me to show you that I love you?”

So we do, we sit on the sofa in the music room, nothing but our voices creating a melody discussing what we need from each other. For Damian to tell me the truth about why he’s late to one of our dates and visit me when he’s on patrol. For me to tell Damian whenever I feel slightly unsure of his feelings so he can reassure me and not hide if I’m feeling upset from him. Before visiting the manor today I was unsure how this conversation would go. I didn’t know if this would be the last time we would speak or if the argument would spiral out of control. It was going to tough, I was dating a superhero after all, but at least now we had a plan, a plan which made me hopeful for our future together.

During our conversation I’d ended up in Damian’s lap, head in the crook of his neck, breathing in his scent. The mix of rosin from his violin and the jasmine of his shampoo was so calming to me, it was sending me to sleep. An I love you left my lips, a promise being made with Damian as he repeated it to me, kissing my temple, sealing our promise.

We were going to be okay.