#I'd rather you go into the new year only with the people you want to keep by your side
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weirdly-specific-but-ok · 6 months ago
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for whom good omens is being written
Hey maggots and the rest of the fandom, it's the Good Omens Mascot here. Today I read a post about this tweet:
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The accompanying video genuinely made me cry. And I've been thinking about this for a long while, as far back as February, when I saw a lot of conflicting opinions on what people wanted from the third season. It really is true that no matter what you do, some people will be dissatisfied. But what matters is that Neil is writing this for Terry.
And I was reminded of some paragraphs from the Good Omens TV Companion, which I'd read in Amazon's sample excerpt of the book. I know this is a long post, but I really truly do think you all need to read these, I've done my best to select only the most important parts. Here you go:
'His Alzheimer's started progressing harder and faster than either of us had expected,' says Neil, referring to a period in which Terry recognized that despite everything he could no longer write. 'We had been friends for over thirty years, and during that time he had never asked me for anything. Then, out of the blue, I received an email from him with a special request. It read: “Listen, I know how busy you are. I know you don't have time to do this, but I want you to write the script for Good Omens. You are the only human being on this planet who has the passion, love and understanding for the old girl that I do. You have to do this for me so that I can see it." And I thought, “OK, if you put it like that then I'll do it."
'I had adapted my own work in the past, writing scripts for Death: The High Cost of Living and Sandman, but not a lot else was seen. I'd also written two episodes of Doctor Who, and so I felt like I knew what I was doing. Usually, having written something once I'd rather start something new, but having a very sick co-author saying I had to do this?' Neil spreads his hands as if the answer is clear to see. 'I had to step up to the plate.' A pause, then: 'All this took place in autumn 2014, around the time that the BBC radio adaptation of Good Omens was happening,' he continues, referring to the production scripted and co-directed by Dirk Maggs and starring Peter Serafinowicz and Mark Heap. ‘Terry had talked me into writing the TV adaptation, and I thought OK, I have a few years. Only I didn't have a few years,' he says. 'Terry was unconscious by December and dead by March.'
He pauses again. 'His passing took all of us by surprise,' Neil remembers. 'About a week later, I started writing, and it was very sad. The moments Terry felt closest to me were the moments I would get stuck during the writing process. In the old days, when we wrote the novel, I would send him what I'd done or phone him up. And he would say, "Aahh, the problem, Grasshopper, is in the way you phrase the question," and I would reply, "Just tell me what to do!" which somehow always started a conversation. 'In writing the script, there were times I'd really want to talk to Terry, and also places where I'd figure something out and do something really clever, and I would want to share it with him. So, instead, I would text Terry's former personal assistant, Rob Wilkins, now his representative on Earth. It was the nearest thing I had.'
(...) As Neil himself recognizes, this is an adaptation built upon the confidence that comes from three decades of writing for page and screen. But for all the wisdom of experience, he found that above all one factor guided him throughout the process. 'Terry isn't here, which leaves me as the guardian of the soul of the story,' he explains. 'It's funny because sometimes I found myself defending Terry's bits harder or more passionately than I would defend my own bits. Take Agnes Nutter,' he says, referring to what has become a key scene in the adaptation in which the seventeenth-century author of the book of prophecies foretelling the coming of the Antichrist is burned at the stake. ‘It was a huge, complicated and incredibly expensive shoot, with bonfires built and primed to explode as well as huge crowds in costume. It had to feel just like an English village in the 1640s, and of course everyone asked if there was a cheap way of doing it. 'One suggestion was that we could tell the story using old-fashioned woodcuts and have the narrator take us through what happened, but I just thought, “No”. Because I had brought aspects of the story like Crowley and the baby swap along to the mix, and Terry created Agnes Nutter. So, if I had cut out Agnes then I wouldn't be doing right by the person who gave me this job. Terry would've rolled over in his grave.'
And, finally, this paragraph:
"Once again, Neil cites the absence of his co-writer as his drive to ensure that Good Omens translated to the screen and remained true to the original vision. 'Terry's last request to me was to make this something he would be proud of. And so that has been my job.'"
I think that's so heartwrenchingly beautiful, and so I wanted you all to read this, too, just in case you (like me) don't have the Good Omens TV Companion. It adds another layer of depth and emotion to this already complex and amazing story that we all know and love.
Share this post, if you can, please, so that more people can read these excerpts :")
Tagging @neil-gaiman, @fuckyeahgoodomens and @orpiknight, even if you've definitely read these before :)
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endusviolence · 8 months ago
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Rowling isn't denying holocaust. She just pointed out that burning of transgender health books is a lie as that form of cosmetic surgery didn't exist. But of course you knew that already, didn't you?
I was thinking I'd probably see one of you! You're wrong :) Let's review the history a bit, shall we?
In this case, what we're talking about is the Institut für Sexualwissenschaft, or in English, The Institute of Sexology. This Institute was founded and headed by a gay Jewish sexologist named Magnus Hirschfeld. It was founded in July of 1919 as the first sexology research clinic in the world, and was run as a private, non-profit clinic. Hirschfeld and the researchers who worked there would give out consultations, medical advice, and even treatments for free to their poorer clientele, as well as give thousands of lectures and build a unique library full of books on gender, sexuality, and eroticism. Of course, being a gay man, Hirschfeld focused a lot on the gay community and proving that homosexuality was natural and could not be "cured".
Hirschfeld was unique in his time because he believed that nobody's gender was either one or the other. Rather, he contended that everyone is a mixture of both male and female, with every individual having their own unique mix of traits.
This leads into the Institute's work with transgender patients. Hirschfeld was actually the one to coin the term "transsexual" in 1923, though this word didn't become popular phrasing until 30 years later when Harry Benjamin began expanding his research (I'll just be shortening it to trans for this brief overview.) For the Institute, their revolutionary work with gay men eventually began to attract other members of the LGBTA+, including of course trans people.
Contrary to what Anon says, sex reassignment surgery was first tested in 1912. It'd already being used on humans throughout Europe during the 1920's by the time a doctor at the Institute named Ludwig Levy-Lenz began performing it on patients in 1931. Hirschfeld was at first opposed, but he came around quickly because it lowered the rate of suicide among their trans patients. Not only was reassignment performed at the Institute, but both facial feminization and facial masculization surgery were also done.
The Institute employed some of these patients, gave them therapy to help with other issues, even gave some of the mentioned surgeries for free to this who could not afford it! They spoke out on their behalf to the public, even getting Berlin police to help them create "transvestite passes" to allow people to dress however they wanted without the threat of being arrested. They worked together to fight the law, including trying to strike down Paragraph 175, which made it illegal to be homosexual. The picture below is from their holiday party, Magnus Hirschfeld being the gentleman on the right with the fabulous mustache. Many of the other people in this photo are transgender.
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[Image ID: A black and white photo of a group of people. Some are smiling at the camera, others have serious expressions. Either way, they all seem to be happy. On the right side, an older gentleman in glasses- Magnus Hirschfeld- is sitting. He has short hair and a bushy mustache. He is resting one hand on the shoulder of the person in front of him. His other hand is being held by a person to his left. Another person to his right is holding his shoulder.]
There was always push back against the Institute, especially from conservatives who saw all of this as a bad thing. But conservatism can't stop progress without destroying it. They weren't willing to go that far for a good while. It all ended in March of 1933, when a new Chancellor was elected. The Nazis did not like homosexuals for several reasons. Chief among them, we break the boundaries of "normal" society. Shortly after the election, on May 6th, the book burnings began. The Jewish, gay, and obviously liberal Magnus Hirschfeld and his library of boundary-breaking literature was one of the very first targets. Thankfully, Hirschfeld was spared by virtue of being in Paris at the time (he would die in 1935, before the Nazis were able to invade France). His library wasn't so lucky.
This famous picture of the book burnings was taken after the Institute of Sexology had been raided. That's their books. Literature on so much about sexuality, eroticism, and gender, yes including their new work on trans people. This is the trans community's Alexandria. We're incredibly lucky that enough of it survived for Harry Benjamin and everyone who came after him was able to build on the Institute's work.
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[Image ID: A black and white photo of the May Nazi book burning of the Institute of Sexology's library. A soldier, back facing the camera, is throwing a stack of books into the fire. In the background of the right side, a crowd is watching.]
As the Holocaust went on, the homosexuals of Germany became a targeted group. This did include transgender people, no matter what you say. To deny this reality is Holocaust denial. JK Rowling and everyone else who tries to pretend like this isn't reality is participating in that evil. You're agreeing with the Nazis.
But of course, you knew that already, didn't you?
Edit: Added image IDs. I apologize to those using screen readers for forgetting them. Please reblog this version instead.
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louisa-gc · 6 months ago
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how to start reading again
from someone who was a voracious reader until high school and is now getting back into it in her twenties.
start with an old favourite. even though it felt a little silly, i re-read the harry potter series one christmas and it wiped away my worry that i wasn't capable of reading anymore. they are long books, but i was still able to get completely immersed and to read just as fast as i had years and years ago.
don't be afraid of "easier" books. before high school i was reading the french existentialists, but when getting back into reading, i picked up lucinda riley and sally rooney. not my favourite authors by far, but easier to read while not being totally terrible. i needed to remind myself that only choosing classics would not make me a better or smarter person. if a book requires a slower pace of reading to be understood, it's easier to just drop it, which is exactly what i wanted to avoid at first.
go for essays and short stories. no need to explain this one: the shorter the whole, the less daunting it is. i definitely avoided all books over 350 pages at first and stuck to essay collections until i suddenly devoured donna tartt's goldfinch.
remember it's okay not to finish. i was one of those people who finished every book they started, but not anymore! if i pick up a book at the library and after a few chapters realise i'd rather not read it, i just return it. (another good reason to use your local library! no money spent on books you might end up disliking.)
analyse — or don't. some people enjoy reading more when they take notes or really stop to think about the contents. for me, at first, it was more important to build the habit of reading, and the thought of analysing what i read felt daunting. once i let go of that expectation, i realised i naturally analyse and process what i read anyway.
read when you would usually use your phone. just as i did when i was a child, i try to read when eating, in the bathroom, on public transport, right before sleeping. i even read when i walk, because that's normally a time i stare at my screen anyway. those few pages you read when you brush your teeth and wait for a friend very quickly stack up.
finish the chapter. if you have time, try to finish the part you're reading before closing the book. usually i find i actually don't want to stop reading once i get to the end of a chapter — and if i do, it feels like a good place to pick up again later.
try different languages. i was quickly approaching a reading slump towards the end of my exchange year, until i realised i had only had access to books in english and that, despite my fluency, i was tired of the language. so as soon as i got back home i started picking up books in my native tongue, which made reading feel much easier and more fun again! after some nine months, i'm starting to read in english again without it feeling like a huge task.
forget what's popular. i thought social media would be a fun way to find interesting books to read, but i quickly grew frustrated after hating every single book i picked up on some influencer's recommendation. it's certainly more time-consuming to find new books on your own, but this way i don't despise every novel i pick up.
remember it isn't about quantity. the online book community's endless posts about reading 150 books each year or 6 books in a single day easily make us feel like we're slow, bad readers, but here's the thing: it does not matter at all how many books you read or what your reading pace is. we all lead different lives, just be proud of yourself for reading at all!
stop stressing about it. we all know why reading is important, and since the pandemic reading has become an even more popular hobby than it was before (which is wonderful!). however, there's no need to force yourself to be "a reader". pick up a book every now and then and keep reading if you enjoy it, but not reading regularly doesn't make you any less of a good person. i find the pressure to become "a person who reads" or to rediscover my inner bookworm only distances me from the very act of reading.
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il-miele-che-scrive · 9 months ago
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you know what people are saying when a girl gets cheated on? go for his brother.
a/n not tryna offend anyone, I just love a lil drama
Part 2 here
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username1 Miss Y/n Y/l/n getting cheated on? No one is safe fr
↳username2 Yeah cuz how's he casually cheating on a literal goddess??
username3 they were together for almost 2 years😭
username4 My therapist will hear about this
↳username1 And Arthur is paying the bill
username5 that's it I'm NEVER trusting a man
username6 Isn't that girl Y/n's friend too? Poor girl getting cheated on twice
↳username3 yes it is 😭 guess Arthur got it from his brother
username7 Except Charles didn't cheat 😭 he's a homie hopper but he got morals
username8 I don't worry about Y/n, she's gonna find a new bf, but she wasted almost 2 years on him
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yourusername excuse my state i'm as high as your hopes
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username2 Miss girl about to enter her hoe phase
↳username3 As she should tbh
charlottesiine Lots of fun last night🤍
↳yourusername nothing will beat an ex wags night out
↳username2 best ex wags fr 😭
yoursister Next time I'm going too to keep an eye on you wtf
username4 Wait so Y/n and Charlotte are friends? When did this happen?
↳username5 Yeah cuz we've never seen them hang out back when ChaCha was a thing and suddenly the girls are partying together?
↳username6 I mean it could be just a "we both suffered a Leclerc so let's hang out" kinda thing
username5 WE BOTH SUFFERED A LECLERC 💀 no okay but that's valid
username7 Am I the only one noticing this post was liked by Charles?
↳username2 He knows his lil bro messed up lmao
username8 Okay guys so what are we betting on - did Charles like this post because of Y/n or because of Charlotte? Also, isn't he in a relationship?
↳username3 Charles has been single for a few months now, he's free to like whoever he wants lmao
↳username9 It's just a like it's not that deep
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arthur_leclerc You were my cup of tea but I drink vanilla latte now
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username1 The AUDACITY some men have
username2 and she was her best friend 😭
username3 I really want to believe they broke up before he got with the best friend but I don't think it's true
↳username4 Y/n and Arthur literally attended Charles' race a few days before we got the pics of Arthur with the other girl
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yourusername you don't mean nothing at all to me
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yoursister And I didn't even have to stop you from calling your ex
↳yourusername why would I even wanna call him anyways
yoursister Riiight, you were too busy getting to know some other interesting people:)
username1 What is Y/s/n talking about?
↳username2 Or rather WHO is she talking about?
username3 No Charlotte in the post but Charles is in the likes again 😶
↳username4 Have you seen what this one gossip page posted? Charles being in the likes isn't the thing I'd worry about here
username5 WHAT.
username3 Care to elaborate?
username4 Charles was also at the club with Y/n. It honestly looks like it was organized by a friend of his and he took Y/n there
username2 OH
username2 That's what Y/s/n is talking about
username5 Our girl Y/n is getting promoted from F2 to F1 and I love to see that
↳username6 LMAO it's so funny because it's true 😭
↳username2 Do we know who else was at this party?
username4 Allegedly the party was organized by Gasly, so obviously there was his gf Kika, but also some fellow drivers like Albon, Russell, Sainz, Ocon, Ricciardo and their gfs
username5 I was joking but now it looks like Y/n is actually becoming an F1 wag now lol
username7 Gossip girl on wheels I've been saying it for months
username8 But the caption SLAPS
↳username9 no because it looks like Y/n and Arthur are having a caption war lol it's funny
username8 It's childish but let a girl heal from a heartbreak in peace
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yourusername karma will take it from here
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username1 MISS GIRL?? WHO IS THE MAN??
↳username2 We all know it's Charles (allegedly)
username8 Nah cuz I told yall she's gonna find another boyfriend soon
yoursister Loving to see you happy again ❤️
↳yourusername just needed a little upgrade
username3 I have no proof but I just know it's Charles
username4 Do we think she went for Charles because she genuinely likes him or just to get back at Arthur?
↳username5 Wait until someone starts a "she cheated on Arthur with Charles" gossips
username6 My two favorite red flags
↳username7 The homie hopper and the brother hopper, a match made in heaven
username6 The homie hopper is so real, Y/n recently hung out with his ex Charlotte 💀
username8 What kinda brother gets with his brother's ex?
↳username9 Imagine the next family dinner lmao
username10 Y'all it's not even confirmed that the man is Charles, y'all are crazy
↳username6 The post was liked by all the F1 drivers and their partners that were on the party from Y/n's previous post, it says a lot
↳username2 What @/username6 said and also Y/n is now followed by half of the F1 grid AND the wags
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charles_leclerc Not your cup of tea, but my glass of wine
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yourusername KARMA IS MY BOYFRIEND❤️
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hedgehog-moss · 2 months ago
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(There is blood pictured at the end of this post) (well, 1 drop) (don't worry it's mine, not some innocent creature's)
I found a dormouse in my kitchen today, just chilling on the ceiling above my head, watching me cook. Maybe even judging my cooking technique like Ratatouille. I only noticed its presence because there's a bunch of dried herbs hanging from the ceiling above the stove and at one point I heard a rustling, then a crunching noise.
It was eating my herbs.
As if they were a little snack I'd placed here for my dormouse friends. None of my other animals can walk on the ceiling, therefore any food that's near the ceiling must be an offering to the dormice. (I admit, that's sound logic.)
A dormouse family has been living in my walls since before I moved here—I should probably call it a dormouse dynasty, by now. Here's the first post I wrote about them, in 2019 ! The cats eat a lot of them (especially Morille, she loves dormice) but apparently not enough to make the key decision makers in this dormouse community decide that living in my house is more trouble than it's worth.
Every year when they hibernate and go quiet for eight months I have the renewed hope that this time the cats got rid of all of them, but the next spring they wake up and start scratching inside my walls in the middle of the night again. (Not only that's creepy, but it's so loud.)
Anyway, this dormouse, let's call him Alfred. I saw immediately which hole between two stones he'd crawled out of and the first thing I did was to stuff a salt shaker in there to block his escape route. Step 2 was to call for backup—I summoned Morille, and she came down from the living-room 2 seconds later (the cats know it's always good news when I call them to the kitchen while cooking.)
Alfred was panicking.
I grabbed a broom and started threatening him with it like an angry old woman in a cartoon. He tried to flee towards the ladder, but Morille was there. He tried to flee towards the door, but Morille was also there. He tried to hide on top of the fridge, and Morille happily lay siege to it, like my fridge was a Gallic oppidum on top of a hill and Morille was Caesar and his entire army.
Morille was having the time of her life.
But my kitchen door was ajar, and Alfred managed a heroic jump from the top of the fridge to the lintel, like a flying squirrel. He scurried out then grabbed hold of the climbing rose right above the door. When I got out and took this photo, he looked fairly stressed and pessimistic.
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I didn't want him to climb the wall all the way to the eaves and go right back into my house, so I went back in to get my broom again, either to make him lose his grip and fall straight into Morille's gaping maw (sorry), or make him run away into the woods (inferior solution; they always find their way back, unless you take them very far away.)
(I used to trap dormice humanely then drive them 3km away to release them near the barn of a neighbour I disliked, but this neighbour has since moved. (Not because of my dormouse warfare, I swear.) There's also an abandoned house in the woods where I used to exile my prisoners, but after a while I started feeling silly driving around the countryside with dormice in the backseat, so I stopped trapping them (it really was a hassle) and just let the cats eat them.)
But Alfred is a combative and resourceful rodent. In the half-minute it took me to go back in and grab my broom, he laid a trap for me.
He ran along the stem of my climbing rose in such a way that his weight made it droop jussst enough to be now hanging at face level rather than above the door. So when I ran outside again with my broom, I was slapped in the face by a thorny rose plant. (For a minute I thought I was crying tears of blood, which seemed worrying, but it was just a scratch above my eye.) (I wish it could leave a tiny scar, so people will ask how I got it, and I will tell them about the mighty dormouse wielding a rose sword.)
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I sent these pics to my brother hoping to get some sympathy, and he cropped & desaturated the one with the blood teardrop then sent it back with the comment "you look like an Evanescence song"
By this point I decided Alfred had won this battle. (Not the war, because it's almost autumn aka hibernation time so he probably found another gap between two stones and went right back inside. The war continues.) But this humble dormouse set a Saw trap to poke my eyes out the second I stepped outside my house and I respect that. I admire the way he used his environment to his advantage, and teamed up with my climbing rose to level the playing field (since I had teamed up with my cat first.) He has won the right to spend another winter inside my walls, curled up in my cosy wool insulation, dreaming of dried herbs, thwarted cats, and heroic skydiving from fridgetops.
Well played.
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taasgirl · 5 months ago
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somethin' stupid - oscar piastri
summary: carlos sainz's sister, y/n, owns a bakery in barcelona, and during the spanish gp, she begins to see a certain face a little more
a/n: there is no face claim so imagine y/n as you wish!
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liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, and 16, 287 others ynbakery Make sure you head into the bakery before the Grand Prix this weekend (don't worry, I will NOT be selling whatever Carlos is making)!
carlossainz55 Plenty of people will want the pancakes I made 😡
landonorris Don't worry Carlos I will try some ynbakery landnorris Get a room you two
carlossainz55 Best bakery in Spain!!
user52 aww carlos is so supportive
lilymhe barca weekend + y/n's pastries = heaven
ynbakery LILY I LOVE YOU
user91 i may not have tickets to the gp, but i do have 3 euros to spend on y/n's famous muffins
user67 I'm so ready for all the drivers to be at the bakery HAHA
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liked by ynsainz, oscarpiastri, and 82, 932 others lilymhe the fia need to make barca the only circuit all year round purely because of y/n's pastries tagged: alexalbon, ynsainz, ynbakery
ynsainz you are welcome at my bakery whenever you wish
alex_albon If you haven't had that croissant, you haven't lived
georgerussell63 Real
user28 Y/N'S BAKERY!! PLEASE SOMEONE GET THE GRID IN THERE
user63 IF OSCAR WENT HE WOULD LITERALLY BECOME OSCAR PASTRY LMAOOO
user59 lily and alex are so cute i cant
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liked by oscarpiastri, lilymhe, and 33, 209 others ynsainz slide 3 trigger warning tagged: carlossainz55
landonorris HAHAHA
carlossainz55 hermana...
ynsainz sorry king I had to do it
oscarpiastri Will the bakery be open all weekend?
ynsainz yes all days except for sunday!!
user74 y/n you are so beautiful
lilymhe Such a pretty girl 💜 liked by ynsainz
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view oscarpiastri's story...
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tagged: ynbakery
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liked by ynsainz, charles_leclerc, and 3, 726, 198 others scuderiaferrari Raceday pancakes?
ynsainz SOMEONE STOP CARLOS FROM THIS PANCAKE BUSINESS I CANNOT DO IT ANYMORE
user87 i'm crying 😭😭
charles_leclerc I think we should leave the cooking to y/n
ynsainz I agree thank you
landonorris I've never seen someone look worse in an apron and chefs hat @ carlossainz55
user22 what is carlos' obssesion with pancakes...
user98 RACEDAY PANCAKES?? GET THEM IN THE FUCKING CAR
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liked by oscarpiastri, charles_leclerc, and 44, 827 others ynsainz race day bitchesss 😎 #idratherbeatmybakery
oscarpiastri I'd rather be at your bakery too
lilymhe excuse me oscar but i was just abt to comment this
user55 y/n clutching up with the charlos pics
user60 sorry but umm oscar??
scuderiaferrari End of race pancakes?
ynsainz STOP NO. NO MORE FUCKING PANCAKES
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liked by mclaren, landonorris, and 2, 198, 277 others oscarpiastri Barcelona recap ft. a non-edible y/n croissant
mclaren 🧡
ynsainz hope you enjoyed the gift!!
user87 Y/N GOT OSCAR A JELLYCAT
user52 wake up babe, oscar piastri is making moves on his enemy's sister
carlossainz55 ...
user98 IM SCREAMING
user53 official y/n bakery verdict?
oscarpiastri Really really delicious
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liked by carlossainz55, charles_leclerc, and 11, 727 others ynbakery Aaaaaand we're back open! First twenty people in store receive a free muffin from our new range!
oscarpiastri Yummm
ynbakery oh hey pastry boy 🥐
landonorris Oh we'll be stopping by then
user61 we?
lilymhe breakfast, lunch, dinner, and my snack are now sorted for the day (please never close again)
ynbakery I think we need an honorary lily cookie...
view oscarpiastri's story...
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tagged: ynbakery
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liked by charles_leclerc, ynsainz, and 4, 982, 129 others carlossainz55 Proud to be back at home, we go again 👊
scuderiaferrari 🏎️💨 liked by carlossainz55
oscarpiastri Great race brother
user50 we really got oscar complimenting carlos before gta 6
landonorris Sexyyy
user81 Carlos Sainz the man that you are
user93 thoughts on y/n and oscar 😏
carlossainz55 No thoughts.
view ynsainz's story...
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tagged: oscarpiastri
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liked by landonorris, alex_albon, and 17, 823 others ynbakery For everyone asking if I can get Carlos to bake some things for the shop... NOOOOOO he only makes pancakes 😢
carlossainz55 They are good pancakes y/n
ynbakery yeah okay.
landonorris Don't let him anywhere near any machinery, you're whole place would be shut down
ynbakery HAHA carlossainz55 Says the man who won't eat fish
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liked by lilymhe, ynsainz, and 2, 822, 376 others oscarpiastri My girlfriend is a baker so does that mean I should change my username to oscarpastry? tagged: ynsainz
ynsainz yes i think it does
oscarpiastri Good to know
user44 Y/N AND OSCAR MATCHING JELLYCATS??
carlossainz55 @ ynsainz Are you making pancakes without me
oscarpiastri Don't worry we followed your recipe 🤣 ynsainz oscarpiastri OSCAR DON'T EXPOSE ME
user92 GIRLFRIEND AHHHHHHH
landonorris I am praying for your well being now that carlos is technically your brother in law
oscarpiastri Thanks mate
please let me know if you liked this, i know it's been a while since i last posted! reqs are open!!
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maxwellatoms · 6 months ago
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In one of your last answers, you said “series reboots are usually pretty gross and sad”, and I was wondering if you could expand on that? Assuming “reboot” covers any kind of continuation of a currently cancelled or finished show (and maybe that’s the wrong assumption!), from the outside looking in it feels like a pretty mixed bag. On one hand, if I love XYZ Show, it’s cool that I get more stories with these characters and another chance to support XYZ Show and its creators. On the other, it definitely feels like a lot of ideas can only get funding if they’re tied to something already, meaning creatives are having to now tie whatever cool idea they have to some reboot/relaunch/retread, which can feel pretty disheartening if you don’t want to do a reboot/relaunch/retread. Is that a similar feeling from your side of the industry?
Thank you so much for all your answers and insight!
Usually reboots and spin-offs are just cash grabs. It happens a lot in animation. In fact, I would argue that the entire industry is just one big cash grab now. In the 80s, everyone complained that cartoons were just half-hour commercials for toys. And they were right. And we're right back there, but now that you can't legally push toys all day, it's just general "IP". Mugs, posters, more spinoffs, whatever.
I was offered three show running gigs over the pandemic. All reboots that I would consider unwise to pursue because they were "of a different time" and didn't (in my opinion) have anything more to say. Two of them were properties created by notorious sex pests, so there's also that. The animation industry loves to prop up its sex pests.
I turned all of them down, partially because I didn't respect the original creators but also because none of them had anything going for them except just being "more of the same".
I don't think any of those projects survived the intervening years, so in retrospect I maybe should've taken the job. I'd probably feel a bit gross, but at least I'd have floors in my house.
The entertainment industry is in a bad spot. The whole thing. I've had I don't know how many pitch meetings in the last few years, and they all start the same way:
"Hey! Before we start, we just want to let you know that we're not actively producing anything right now. We think maybe soon, but we won't be picking anything up today..."
And then later:
"The little we are doing is IP, so if you have a new take on our IP or a new IP you're connected to that you can bring in, that'd be great."
I always wanted to make original stuff. There came a time when I'd had my fill of Billy & Mandy and wanted to do something else new and original. That never manifested, and I was constantly being offered IP to produce. I turned too many of those down, maybe, before deciding that it was probably better that I run the IPs that mean something to me rather than having some hack do it.
But now those jobs have all gone to celebrities and fallen live-action writers, who are also slowly being eaten by the system. WB was hot for Scooby stuff a few years back, so I pitched some ideas. A few of them were turned down for being "off-brand" in a variety of ways. WB has now made (I think) all of those off-brand shows (or something close) with celebrity show runners.
I was going through a whole Midlife Impostor Syndrome thing recently where I was wondering if maybe I don't just suck. Like, it's weird that for a couple of decades I'd have people calling me trying to get me to run shows, and now nobody will call me back about the possibility of a design job.
Talking to some friends and realizing that they were in a similar situation helped me feel like I wasn't alone. That was nice. Talking to some of the most talented colleagues in my industry made me made me realize that those people weren't getting jobs either. That was unnerving. Talking to complete strangers in other parts of the entertainment industry now has me thinking that the whole house of cards is coming down. That's real concerning, yo.
It's hard not to think it's purposeful, when deranged billionaires own the entirety of our media and want to shape a society where they can't be criticized. We're letting wealthy tech bros firebomb the very heart of our culture, and it's weird that no one is talking about it. Because (for now) we still have that capability.
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katsu28 · 8 months ago
Text
for you i'd wait forever
pairing: bradley "rooster" bradshaw x reader
summary: bradley breaks things off with you before a deployment because he doesn't want you to worry about him (4.2k)
warnings: some swearing, bradley's commitment issues, happy ending i promise!
a/n: okay so from what i gathered from my googling is that tapping out is typically for new military graduates (i think?) but this idea was so cute so pls forgive the inaccuracies i have no idea what i'm doing at all <3 and also pls forgive me for the utter lack of writing since the beginning of the year, these last few months have been brutal (creatively and otherwise) but i am hopefully back!!! xx
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Bradley thought he knew the tolls of being in the Navy. It was tough on not only him, but the people in his life. For the most part, he’d always put his career first. His life had always been on a set track, and although there were plenty of setbacks, he forged ahead until he got where he was today. 
And then he met you. Fell in love with you. Finally knew what it meant to have someone in his corner who was just his. Who knew him for him only, not as Goose’s kid, or Mav’s protege.
For the first time in his life, he could actually see himself spending the rest of it with you. Marriage, house, kids, grandkids—the whole shebang.
That was his first mistake. The more he thought about what life could look like with you, the more he thought about what your life could look like without him. What would happen if something happened to him and he didn’t make it back from this next mission coming up in a few weeks. 
He thought about his mom and how she lost his dad—her husband. The man she thought she’d be spending the rest of her life with. 
Bradley’s thoughts grew quite grim after that. Countless what if’s and thinking about every possible outcome and he eventually made up his mind. He had to break up with you. 
He didn’t want to. Not by a long shot. You were probably the best thing that ever happened to him in his thirty plus years of life. But deep down, he knew that it was the right thing to do. He was about to leave for six, seven months, with little to no contact with anyone who wasn’t Navy. That would definitely take a toll on your relationship. You’d never been through something like this before, and there really was no way to prepare you for what it would be like. 
You would worry about him every single hour of every single day, he knew that for a fact. Bradley barely remembered what it was like when his dad was away because he was so young, but he did remember how worried his mom was all the time.
Looking back, he understood now. He didn’t want that for you. The worry would hold you back from other things you wanted to do in life, things that brought you joy and gave you purpose. 
With the mission creeping up on him faster than he would’ve liked, he knew he had to do it sooner rather than later. 
That was how Bradley found himself on your doorstep right now, pushing down his guilt by telling himself over and over that breaking up with you was in your best interest. He hadn’t called beforehand to tell you he was coming by, so when you answered the door and beamed brighter than the stars when your eyes landed on him, he almost wanted to chicken out. 
“Hi!” You exclaimed, immediately pulling him into a warm hug. His arms closed around you out of instinct, thumb rubbing over the sliver of exposed skin at your waist, nose nudging its way against your neck the way he always did when you embraced him. 
He inhaled the scent of the lotion you loved to use, that flowery one that sometimes made him sneeze. You always said you’d buy a different one the next time you went to the store, but you always forgot. He didn’t mind it at all though. A small bout of allergies was nothing compared to the inevitable smattering of apology kisses you pressed to his face when you realized you’d forgotten. 
Fuck, this was going to be way harder than he thought. 
Your hands made their way up his biceps to cup his cheeks, eyes darting around his face. “What’re you doing here? Oh my god, did we have something planned? I’m so—” 
“No.” He gave his head a shake, offering you a smile. “No, we didn’t have anything planned. I just…wanted to see you. To talk to you.” 
“Come in, come in, I was just about to start dinner,” You hummed, escaping his embrace with an arm hooked through his to tug him over the threshold. “Trying a new recipe I found the other day, not sure if it’ll turn out good or end up being a shitshow, but—well, you can help me be the judge of that, I guess!” 
“Is it okay if we talk first?” 
If you were confused, you didn’t show it, just changed direction seamlessly, making your way to the couch instead of the kitchen. You sat down, patting the cushion next to you for him to settle on and he did, rubbing his clammy palms against his thighs. 
“Is everything okay?” 
Everything was far from okay, he wanted to say. Instead he inhaled a deep breath before his next words. 
“I wanted to tell you I’m shipping out in a few weeks.” 
Your face fell a little, but you nodded thoughtfully. “Okay. What do we do? Is there anything you can tell me? Like, what’s the best way to get in touch with you, when’s the best time, that kind of stuff? Or is sending letters better? Sorry, I feel like I’m asking a lot of questions. I don’t—I’ve never really done anything like this before, so—” 
“I think we should break up.” He blurted. 
You hesitated before answering, blinking at him like you’d somehow heard him wrong. “What?” 
“It’s hard having someone overseas for a long time, even more so when it’s a partner. It was really hard on my mom, and hard for me having to watch her worry like that for months, and I—I don’t want that for you.” He said quietly, not daring to meet your eyes until he gave his poor excuse for an explanation on why he was doing the one thing he swore he wouldn’t do to you. 
The moment he’d realized he’d fallen in love with you, he’d promised himself he would never abandon you, never break your heart or your trust, and here he was, doing that exact thing. It was tearing him apart inside. 
“I don’t want you to have to go through all that, so it’s just better if we—that we break up now. Before I go.” 
“What are you doing?” 
“I’m sorry. It’s for the best.” 
“Why are you doing this?” Your voice broke just after the last word, swallowed up by a hitched inhale of a breath that had his resolve wavering just the slightest bit. He could barely look you in the eyes the whole time, and now…he didn’t think he could stand the sadness and hurt flooding every single one of your beautiful features. 
“All the worrying and the uncertainty of not knowing what’s happening, I don’t—it wouldn’t be fair to you. I care about you too much to put you through all of that.” 
You were silent for the longest time, eyes glued to the floor as you processed the information. He thought you were about to start crying with the way your brow creased, but when you finally looked back up at him, your gaze had hardened. “Did these last six months mean nothing to you? You’re just gonna throw everything away because what—you don’t think I can handle it?” 
They meant everything to me, he wanted to say. You mean everything to me. 
If he was really being honest with himself, it was him who couldn’t handle it. Still, he forged on, thinking it best to just rip off the bandaid. He could live with being the asshole if it meant sparing you from the terrible experience of him being god knows how many miles away for months. 
“I’m sorry. I wish you nothing but happiness, Y/N. You deserve better than anything I could ever give you.” 
“You wish me nothing but happiness?” You chuckled humorlessly, shaking your head. Bradley’s eyes tracked you across the room as you paced back and forth, guilt ridden expression on full display. All he wanted to do was take all of it back; to kiss you senseless and tell you everything was going to work out, but he couldn’t. He’d burned the bridge, cut the rope. Broke your heart. He felt like the biggest asshole in the world. He probably was. “Screw you, Bradley. I mean it.”
“I’m sorry.” He repeated, for what seemed like the hundredth time. It was all he could say. 
“Get the fuck out of my house.” 
“Y/N, I—” 
You rushed at him, pushing, shoving, sending him stumbling step by step towards the front door until he almost crashed into it had he not managed to pull it open a split second before you shoved him outside. He’d never forget the look of betrayal in your eyes right before you slammed the door in his face. 
Bradley forced his feet to take him back to his car, then to drive away before he could have a chance to even try and make things better. He’d most likely end up making things much, much worse. Though he didn’t think it could get any worse with the way he was feeling about himself right now. You were angry at him, and you had every right to be. 
But had he lingered at your door only moments after, he would’ve heard the thump against the wood that was you sliding down to the floor and the sob that escaped your mouth. 
All because of him. 
-------
Bradley was happy to finally be coming back home after ages away, but then he realized it—he didn’t have anyone to tap him out this time. His mind jumped to you first, but there was no chance in hell you’d be there for him. You’d probably moved on months ago. Forgotten about him. And with Mav away on another deployment, he really had no one. 
His chest ached the longer he stood at attention, jaw clenched tighter than he meant it to be as he watched the rest of his squad get tapped out by their loved ones. Coyote’s parents, Fanboy’s sisters, Hangman’s nieces and nephews, Phoenix’s girlfriend. They were all emotional reunions, and Bradley was happy for them, he really was. But it sucked being the one with nobody there for him. 
He wasn’t expecting the soft tap on his arm when it came. He thought it was a mistake at first; someone else’s family bumping into him accidentally, so he didn’t move. But when the hand didn’t leave its place wrapped loosely around his bicep, Bradley knew it really was for him. He turned around, squinting against the blinding sunlight to see who’d come for him. 
“Hi.” You said softly, hand dropping back down to your side. He couldn’t help but let himself take you in, eyes drinking in every single achingly familiar detail of you until you shifted nervously under his intense gaze. You looked so beautiful he almost felt dizzy, just like he remembered but at the same time somehow even better. 
“You came.” He said, disbelieving. He could still hardly believe you were actually here. 
“I promised you I would.” 
“But that—that was before…everything happened. Why are you—what’re you doing here?” The last thing he wanted to sound like was ungrateful, because he was quite literally the opposite, but his mind just couldn’t wrap around the fact that despite him breaking your heart seven months ago, you still remembered what you’d promised him in the very beginning of your relationship. 
“What does it mean to tap someone out?” You asked quietly, tracing a finger along the planes of Bradley’s bare chest. Your legs were tangled under the covers, both of you still basking in the aftermath of getting reacquainted with each other again after Bradley had been out of town attending a weeklong training exercise. 
His skin was still damp with sweat, but you didn’t mind one bit, too busy exploring the expanse of muscle shifting under his bronzed skin again. “In military terms, I mean.” 
He chuckled, hiding a content smile into the hair at the crown of your head. “That’s a weird question.” 
“Humor me, Bradshaw.” 
“Yes ma’am.” Bradley stroked a rough palm down the smooth skin of your arm, taking a few beats to come up with an answer that would make sense. “Tapping out is a super long standing tradition in pretty much all military units, I think. It comes at the end of a mission, when we’ve come back to base.” 
His arm repositioned itself under your head as he scooted closer to the warmth radiating from your body, nose nuzzling deeper against you just so he could engrain the smell of your lingering fruity scented shampoo into his memory forever. 
How you still smelled so good even after your…physical activities just before this was beyond him, but he loved it. 
“An aviator’s loved ones are usually the ones to do it. Friends, family, those kinds of people. When you tap out your aviator, literally you’re releasing them from formation. But I guess it’s kind of a gesture that means…you’re home.” 
Your wandering fingers stilled against his skin, lingering right above his heart. “Can I ask you something?” 
“Go for it.” 
“Who usually taps you out?” 
Bradley remained silent. It was an innocent question, he knew that. He’d told you a little bit about his parents, and you were just curious. Still, it sent a pang of sadness through his chest whenever he thought about what it would’ve been like if they were still around today. 
He cleared his throat, sniffing once. “Usually Mav. Or sometimes one of my squad’s family. If no one can, I just gotta wait til everyone else is done.” 
“I wanna do it.”
“What?” 
“I’m gonna be there next time you come back from a mission. To tap you out.” 
“I appreciate it, honey, I do. But you don’t need to.” 
“I want to.” You said firmly, pulling away from him to prop yourself up on your elbow and look him in the eye. You looked damn serious too. He raised a quizzical brow. “You said that to tap someone out means to tell them they’re home. I want to be the one to tell you you’re home. Here. With me.” 
Bradley opened his mouth like he was going to say something, then snapped shut when no words came out. He really was at a loss for words. No one had ever done that before. Sure, Mav’s offer was always a good one to fall back on, but Bradley had never had someone he cared about as much as he did about you telling him they were going to be there for him. 
The next best thing he could think of instead of saying anything at all was to kiss you. So he did. 
He pushed himself up towards you, sliding a hand around the nape of your neck and pressing his lips against yours. Not bruisingly hard, but enough to let you know he was all in. The other hand curled around your shoulder, splaying across your back to bring you back in closer to him, until your chests were flush and you could feel his heartbeat thundering under your palm.
He was home. You were his home. 
“I told you I’d be here to tap you out, and I meant it.” You said simply, holding his gaze. “I keep my promises, Bradshaw. Even after the way you left things.” 
Red hot guilt crept its way through his chest like vines, bringing all the memories of the last time you saw each other right back up to the surface, even after how hard he’d tried to shove them all down. If there was one thing he regretted in life, it was how he left you that night. He didn’t think he’d ever forgive himself for that one. 
“I don’t even know what to say, Y/N, I—” 
“Then let me say something.” You blurted, wringing your hands. Bradley nodded instantly, still too dumbfounded to reply. “I’ve been thinking about what I wanted to say to you today for months. I don’t even know if I should.” 
“You should.” He encouraged, nodding quickly. He’d always wanted you to be able to speak your mind with him. “Don’t hold back. Let me hear it.” 
“Okay. Okay, well first of all, you’re an asshole, Bradley.” 
He nodded again. He deserved at least that much. “I am. Absolute asshole, I know.” 
“But I never stopped loving you. Even though I was angry and sad and confused as fuck as to why you would do that to me, I still loved you. And eventually, I realized that it wasn’t anything I did wrong. You were scared. Of losing me, of me losing you. So you decided it was your responsibility to pull the ripcord before you crashed and burned.” Bradley winced slightly at the comparison and you grimaced at your own poor choice in words. “I—sorry, I didn’t mean it like that.” 
“It’s okay. You’re right. You didn’t deserve that.” 
“You said you didn’t want me to worry while you were gone, well, I did that anyways.” You chuckled, like you were remembering a fond memory instead of the constant state of anxiety you’d been in. “But instead of worrying that the man I love might not make it home, I was terrified that if you didn’t come home, I’d spend my whole life replaying our last conversation in my head. Wondering if there was something I could’ve said or done so you wouldn’t have given up on us so easily.” 
“You think that was easy for me? Sweetheart, walking away from you was one of the hardest things I’ve had to do in my whole life.” 
“Sure seemed pretty easy.” You scoffed lightly, only a tad spiteful. A low blow, you realized, when Bradley stiffened for a split second, but you held steady. 
“It wasn’t.” His reply was immediate and firm as could be, but somehow, that didn’t make you feel any better. “You have to understand, breaking things off was the last thing I wanted to do. But I couldn’t—I thought that if I didn’t, you’d wait for me.” 
“I would’ve waited, Bradley! I did wait for you! For you, I'd wait forever because I love you, but you didn’t even give me that choice. You made the decision on your own instead of talking to me about it. That was what hurt the most.”  
“I’m sorry.” Bradley said quietly, reaching out to take your hand. His fingers laced through yours almost tentatively, feeling so familiar but so foreign at the same time. There was a point in your life where you never thought that concept would apply to Bradley. “I never should’ve left like that, I wish I could take it all back.” 
“I think I understand now why you did it. I understand that fear that comes with the experience of losing a loved one like that. But Bradley, you’re not responsible for my feelings. And I don’t care how scared you get, I’m not going anywhere. From now on, we work things out together, no matter what you think is best.” 
“From now on? Does that mean…?” 
“You’re my home, Bradley Bradshaw.”
Bradley took your face in his hands and he kissed you, long and hard, pouring every ounce of pent up feelings he’d been bottling up for the past seven months into it. Pain, fear, love, hope—all of it. You were never one to believe in such emotion being able to convey itself through a simple physical action, but now you could honestly say you understood it. 
Your hands spread across the broadness of his back, fingers pressing into the crisp starch of his uniform like you were afraid of letting him go , even though he was home and everything was okay now. Losing him the first time made you angry. You didn’t even want to imagine possibly losing him a second time. 
He drew back, only far enough to press his lips to your forehead, hands still holding you close as could be. “Thank you for coming.”
“I don’t make a habit of breaking my promises.” 
“C’mon, I wanna introduce you to the squad.” He said softly, lacing his fingers through yours. The way he all but bounded over to the group of aviators a little ways away was almost boyish, as was the excitement in his voice when he approached them. “Hey everyone, there’s someone I want you to meet.” Bradley announced, sliding a hand around to the small of your back. 
Everyone’s eyes turned on you, conversations petering to a gradual stop as they looked between you and Bradley. You shifted nervously, suddenly feeling unsure with all the attention on you, but Bradley’s thumb rubbed along your skin, soothing you just a bit. “This is Y/N. My girlfriend.” 
The tall blond reacted the quickest, snapping loudly before aiming a finger in your direction, along with a shiny smile. “Wait, I know you! You’re the one in that photo Rooster keeps tucked in his helmet. Lemme tell you, he looked at that picture every damn day, it was like—” 
Bradley let out a very forced laugh, aiming a not-so-subtle daggered glare at the other man. “Okay, Hangman! That’s okay, I really don’t think—” 
“You’re a real saint, taking this one back. If I ever pulled the shit he did, my car would’ve been keyed to all hell when I came home.” Hangman chuckled, giving his head a shake. 
“Hangman. Shut. Up.” 
“Don’t tell me to shut up, you shut up!” 
“You’re the only one talking!” 
“Alright, alright, you’re both grown men here,” The dark haired woman sighed, turning towards you. “At least, I hope so.” 
You chuckled at that, casting a glance over at Bradley to find him already looking back at you, the back and forth with Hangman already long forgotten given the way he was smiling at you, like you were the force that made the world go round. Taking you in under his arm, he dotted a kiss to your hairline as your fingers came up to intertwine with his again, watching you interact with his squad like you’d known them for years. 
It was everything he ever wanted. And now that he had it, he’d never be dumb enough to let it go again. 
His mind drifted back to his parents’ fate— how they never got to live out their life together. How there was no guarantee about anything when it came to Bradley’s own fate with you.
And sure, it was scary to be so uncertain about the future, but you’d both climb that hill together when the time came. For now, Bradley could let himself be content. This second chance at a life with you wasn’t one he was planning on taking lightly, not by a long shot. 
“Let’s get off this damn carrier and hit the town! Drinks at the Hard Deck, last one there buys the first round!” Hangman’s drawling voice drew Bradley out of his thoughts, just in time to let the words sink in.
You, on the other hand, stifled a giggle at the sight of seeing a group of full grown adults scatter as fast as Bradley’s friends did. Watching Hangman nearly shove Coyote to the ground upon seeing their cars were parked next to each other was something you’d never not get a kick out of. 
But Bradley, he didn’t seem as worried about it all. In fact, he walked leisurely with your hand firmly in his, swinging both of them between the two of you as you made your way to your own car. 
“Aren’t you worried you’ll be the last one there?” 
“I’ll buy the round, I don’t care.” He shrugged. “I wanna spend some time with my girl.” 
“Your girl.” You hummed, giving his hand a squeeze. “Gotta say, I’ve missed hearing that.” 
“I’ve missed saying it. We’ve got a lot to catch up on, honey. Starting with, do you or do you not have a voodoo doll made in my image that you stabbed with pins when I was away because I broke your heart?” 
You scoffed, letting out a not so attractive snort. “Bradley, I mean this in the most respectful way possible—what the hell are you talking about? Where would you even get that idea?”
“I—uh, I had a dream about it? A few weeks into deployment.” He admitted sheepishly, cheeks burning red in embarrassment. You pressed your lips together, trying not to laugh. “You don’t, right?” 
“Don’t be ridiculous.” You replied, giving his chest a firm pat. You didn’t have a voodoo doll of him, of course, but playing along was worth it just to see Bradley squirm. 
“Wait, wait, wait, but you didn’t say no.” 
“I didn’t.” 
“So you do?” 
“I didn’t say that either. But if you’re not sure, I’d watch yourself the next couple weeks.” 
His brows furrowed in confusion and a bit of fear as he watched you walk away from him with some bounce to your step. “I…really don’t like the sound of that. Hang on, get back here. Explain, please!” 
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indecisivemuch · 2 months ago
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hii first of all luv the username cause as a libra rising, samedt ;-; i'd like to make a request for a luke x f!reader fic pls!! um, so they're best friends, and luke decides to confess to r by giving her gifts, letters, trinkets, etc. with hints about his identity, but she doesn't know who they're from. so she asks for luke's help to find out about the identity of her secret admirer. but what if there's like a mistaken identity and she thinks it's someone from the hermes cabin (maybe chris? or one of the stoll brothers idk) and luke's just all pouty but nonchalant or something, but deep down he's like 'how do i even make her see' or something (while also second guessing that maybe he shouldn't confess it's him) like fluff with tiny angst :>
Message in a Bottle
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Pairing: Luke Castellan x Reader
Summary: You got a secret admirer and recruited Luke to help you find out who they are...ignoring the most obvious option (Fluff, angst, best friends to lovers, happy ending)
Note: I'm so sorry for the six month hiatus. It wasn't by choice, I swear 😭. So many bad things kept happening that prevented me from writing (is this the writers curse people kept talking about?). Also, the request wanted only a sprinkle of angst, but I kinda got out of hand with it I think 😭 (sorry).
Word count: 4.4k (whoops)
You’ve always thought that too much of something is bad. Yet, ever since the day your life intertwined with Luke Castellan’s, you weren’t very sure about that anymore. 
The two of you arrived at camp around the same time, entering a friendship that felt like hitting the jackpot. Your early days together were something that you both treasured dearly. Every time you thought a certain time period would someday be reminisced as the golden days of your friendships, new things would come, and top it off. 
However, golden skies were soon evaded by clouds of pink hues. You found yourself noticing and appreciating small details you haven’t noticed before about your best friend. Initially, you acknowledged the growing feeling but decided that they better remain as footnotes in chapters of your life. However, fate’s design was different to your plans, because two years later, here you were: you looked at him almost in the same way a fool would look at the world with rose-colored glasses (but then again, maybe it was because you have learned to embrace and adore his flaws).
“Luke!”
The Hermes cabin counselor snapped his head towards the sound of your voice, eyes straying from his duty of the hour. A smile began forming on his face as you came to view, almost like he has always been programmed to do so. There was a certain spring in your steps. Moments like these made Luke feel like he was a minimalist because your happiness was somehow enough to guarantee his own. 
You situated yourself next to Luke on the ground, not minding the dirt.
“Hey now, I’m meant to be watching these kids train, don’t come over and distract me,” the Hermes cabin counselor warned, though he didn’t move his eyes away from you. He simply couldn’t.
Everything about you served as a distraction to him. From the soft smirk gracing your lips to the innocent tilting of your head. Every little detail about you was captivating and was equally capable of drawing his attention away from wherever it was meant to be. 
In fact, his attention issue around you was getting rather shameless because his friends have begun picking up on it and started teasing him for it. Personally, Luke doesn’t think it was his fault. His eyes just happen to draw to you in every room like second nature, while his mind short-circuited every time you were near. 
Maybe, and just maybe being rational and able to function properly has stopped being his forte…at least whenever you were around.
Your eyes moved to the group of kids that were only going to be at camp for the summer. From the looks of it, Luke has just assigned them to practice sword fighting in pairs. You then glanced back at your best friend, discreetly drinking in the sight of him. 
No doubt he did his fair share of demonstration before letting these kids go off on their own, because right now, his face was slightly flushed, veins evident on his forearm while the familiar orange shirt clung onto his body with glistening sweat.
You shook away the non-platonic thoughts and teased him, “Oh, come on, you wouldn’t pass up on talking to me. You adore me too much.” 
Damn right, he does. Luke could feel his cheeks heat up again.
“Fine. What are you here for, firecracker?”
“I got another gift,” you informed, presenting the bracelet in your hand. 
For the past month, you have been receiving small letters and gifts. This time it was a handmade bracelet with beads of your favorite colors, as well as charms that represented some of your hobbies and favorite things. It was clear that your anonymous admirer had put a lot of thought into such a small item. However, as always, there were no identities attached to it, leaving you clueless about the person behind these gestures.
Luke took your hand in his, eying the accessory that perfectly fitted your wrist. He started toying with the beads around your wrist that were shining in your favorite color.
The boy’s gaze flicked from the object to you, catching your soft and warm look. Gods, if you kept looking at him like that, he might just actually stop thinking logically. He could practically feel a confession lingering behind his lips, threatening to spew the second his ropes of restraint died.
“Anyway, I came here with an idea,” you broke the silence. “What if I try to find out who this person is? I mean, some of these gifts are quite specific. They seem to know my favorite color, flowers, and things I like. Surely, it wouldn’t be that hard to narrow it down and figure it out?”
Something shifted in your best friend’s behavior and you could feel it. There was a slight flustering look on Luke’s face as he avoided eye contact with you. It was rather strange to see the Hermes cabin counselor so fidgety. Luke has always been confident and composed, and you’d often be the one to humble down his playful cocky remarks. Half-way through looking at his behavior, you began speaking:
“You…”
Luke could feel the blood draining from his face at your facial expression, his face paling despite how flushed he was seconds ago from demonstrating sword fighting. The boy tried to regain his composure, though his attempt at seeming nonchalant failed as you touched his arm. Did you—
“You can be my inside man, talk to these guys to see if they’d slip up or something like that.” 
“I don’t think that’s a very good idea,” Luke hastily replied, clearing his throat.
“Oh, I’m sorry. Did that come across as a suggestion? I hate to break it to you but being best friends means you sorta have to participate in my schemes,” your lips curled as Luke grunted at your words. 
“Yeah, but—”
“Luke, please…it’ll be fun,” he almost scoffed at your words and unconvincing argument. Clearly, the two of you had different definitions of fun. Just as he opened his mouth to reject your idea again, his eyes caught yours. You were looking at him in such an eager and heart-warming gaze that it made him forget what he was intending to say.
Ah, there was no denying anymore. Being rational and able to function properly has truly stopped being his forte.
“Fine,” Luke uttered, the word pricking his tongue as regret started kicking in as he accepted being your accomplice. This decision could only come back to bite him in the ass. He watched as you quickly celebrated his lack of restraint.
“Ah, you gave in quite quickly,” you jabbed.
“Shut up.”
Oh, you were going to be the death of him.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Two days have passed since you got Luke to agree to help you find your secret admirer. Though, the boy must say, the last forty eight hours have been slightly comedic for him, watching you trying to track down your secret admirer…
While the real sender of those gifts was right beside you, nodding along to your every word. 
Luke’s mind trailed to the origin of this “secret admirer” idea. He started it as a way to abate the urge of straight-up blurting out how love-struck he was with his own best friend, while also testing out the waters before finally confessing his feelings for you. 
Though it was slightly amusing how the idea led him to where he was right at that moment. The Hermes cabin counselor zoned out as he pretended to speak to another boy you thought was behind those sweet gifts and letters. 
Luke used to have those feelings under rein, but self-repression only caused it to grow exponentially. Initially, the Hermes cabin counselor dismissed those beyond friendly thoughts, thinking they would eventually fizzle away. However, against his predictions, this fondness towards you became a sort of companion to him for three long years. 
Not only that, years of excessively burying these feelings six feet underground also came back to bite him in the ass because instead of having his feelings under control, they now have the upper hand. 
Sometimes he felt like a puppet, while his feelings plucked the strings. His facial expressions were forever cursed to be sculpted in raw yearning whenever around you, having no choice over how he reacts to everything related to you.
But it didn’t matter, because he was going to finally confess soon.
Luke almost burst out laughing at the way you were standing in anticipation, waiting for his intel on the most recent candidate. It was entertaining, to say the least, pretending to engage in investigative conversation before heading back to you, shaking his head in feigned disappointment. 
However, it didn’t take long before the Hermes cabin counselor started feeling sour.
Just as he made it back to your side, he watched as you started talking again, already discussing the next guy you thought might have done these things that Luke himself came up with. He eyed your in sync footsteps with a heavy heart. Despite the matching movement, he somehow still felt eternally behind. Luke was so close, yet so far away, and never quite able to grasp onto your ever moving attention. 
Did you not consider him as an option at all? Did you truly not see him as anything other than a good friend? It started stinging him knowing you were considering all these other guys as potential candidates — the faces that now haunt him in his sleep, poisoning his mind with an acidic jealousy that was eating away his common senses and fueling immoral thoughts. 
Soon enough, that same jealousy seared his mind with this overwhelming self-doubt. Luke’s foot started feeling cold at the thought of confessing. Gods, he never thought the same security behind anonymity would now make him feel desperate to be seen by you. 
“Maybe I should give up,” you concluded, mindlessly staring ahead. Your attention elsewhere gave Clarisse and Chris an opportunity to send each other knowing looks. The two have been watching you run around in circles on a goose hunt, not knowing to look right behind at the sulking figure that was trailing after you. 
Your distracted state also meant you didn’t notice the moping human situated beside you. However, hearing your declaration of ending your chase, Luke saw a window of opportunity. Maybe now was finally the time to be truthful. After all, if he doesn’t tell you, then how will you know and see him? Luke’s momentary motivation carried him through waves of dejection.
“Y/N, I need to tell you something,” Luke blurted out without much more thought or preparation, and his tone made you fully turn to him. Just as words finally formed and the boy opened his mouth to tell you—
“Hey Y/N, can I talk to you privately?” Somebody interrupted. Your eyes didn’t leave Luke immediately, but when you saw your best friend’s momentum had faltered, you turned to the stranger. It was another Hermes boy, somebody who you’ve seen around. You politely agreed and left with him. 
“So, I heard you’ve been looking for the person who’s been giving you anonymous gifts. And well, it’s your lucky day, 'cause…” the boy stared you up and down while you subconsciously took a small step back when he leaned forward. “...I’ve decided to come forward and reveal myself.”
“Okay…well, prove it” you squinted. Though your skepticism didn’t make the Hermes boy in front of you falter. Clearly, he expected this.
“The first thing you were given was a note, and…the two most recent gifts were a cassette tape and a bracelet — which was made from beads of your favorite color and charms like…” you zoned out as the boy started listing out some of your favorite activities that were indeed the charms on your bracelet. You fiddled with the bracelet that you had purposefully hidden out of his view right behind your back.
There was a pinch in your heart that signaled the last bit of hope dying. 
Oh…so Luke really wasn’t your secret admirer.
You internally scoffed at yourself. You should have known right after he said yes to helping you out with finding your secret admirer — which was originally an idea used as bait to determine if Luke was the sender or not, because if it was really him then he wouldn’t have agreed to help you out with this. However, not only did your best friend agree without much convincing from you, but he had seemed so nonchalant and unaffected as you named all these boys you wanted him to talk to. 
Perhaps this secret admirer thing was something good. Somebody has shown interest and their actions have been nothing but sweet. Those letters contained words that were eternally bound to your memories, even altering the way you view yourself for the better. Maybe you could get to know this person and move on from hopelessly crushing on your best friend.  
Halfway through, you realize you were so engulfed in your thoughts that you have zoned out to half of the things the Hermes boy was saying, and merely caught onto the last bit of his speech:
“...thinking maybe we could go on a date and get to know each other more tonight?”
Your stomach churned again, yet you nodded your head.
Move on. Move on. Move on. Move on. 
Your friends gave you questioning looks when you got back to where they were, clearly curious about what you were pulled away for.
“So…that was my secret admirer, and I’m going on a date with him tonight,” you hoped you sounded more enthusiastic than you were feeling. You tried convincing yourself at least it was good knowing definitely how your best friend actually felt about you. Quickly sitting down, you kept your eyes on Clarisse, knowing if you even looked over at Luke, he’d be able to tell straight away that something was wrong.
Your lack of focus also meant you didn’t think much of the quiet murmur from your best friend: “Sorry, I just remember I need to do something.”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
You looked at yourself in the mirror one last time. It was now the afternoon and you just finished getting ready for your date. As you were leaving, you spotted a note at the foot of your cabin. Seeing your name written on the paper, you picked it up while eying it peculiarly.
“You could be the one that I love, 
I could be the one that you dream of,
Message in a bottle is all I can do, 
Standing here hoping it gets to you.”
Your gut feeling stirred, hitting you with waves of higher certainty over suspicions you have previously had and denied.
Those lyrics were directly associated with a memory from summer two years ago. 
Luke and you were sitting by the campfire when he asked what your favorite song was. You told him the name and mentioned you hadn’t listened to it in a while because using technology devices with signals were dangerous for Demigods. The conversation slipped your mind but clearly loitered in your best friend’s mind, because two months later while on your way back to camp from your quest together, he gifted you a tape player along with a cassette of said song along with others that you liked.
You blinked away the image of you leaning on Luke’s shoulder while the two of you listened to the song together on the train back to camp.
You re-read the note again while shaking your head. Perhaps it was a coincidence. Perhaps, that Hermes boy knew the song and it was also one of his favorites. Perhaps—
Your hand started trembling around the paper. Your eyes landed on one small detail in the note: a particular handwriting choice. The rest of it matched with previous notes, but there was one singular scribbling feature you’ve never seen used before. 
Everything came crashing down and your internal eternal cycle of excuses and denial shattered.
You ran. It didn’t matter that it was raining and your attire was getting soaked. It didn’t matter at all because you were frustrated and confused. In other instances, you would have been elated at the possibility of mutual affection, but in that moment, exasperation blinded you from sensibility. 
If what you have concluded was true, then why on Earth would he allow you to go on a date with a person who stole credit for things they didn’t do? This whole time, he made you feel like a fool — for waiting that long and having hope after all that time; for asking the person you were looking for to hunt them down with you; for sulking despite having what you thought was a good opportunity to come along; for borderline going on a date with an imposter; and for not seeing it all along that it was him. 
“It’s you, isn’t it?” you called out.
Despite the rain, you could see your best friend’s figure stiffened before turning around to face you. The boy stood with his hands behind his back, not yet daring to look at you. 
“The “th”. You connected the cross in the ‘t’ directly to the ‘h’,” you presented the note in your hand, pointing specifically at the slip up that Luke had made in the latest note, not caring of the raindrops that were hitting the paper. “It’s how I write it, and you started writing it the same way a year after we got to know each other because you liked the way it looked,” you pressed further.
The expression on Luke’s face painted your theory into the truth of the situation. You felt your hand slightly shaking at the revelation.
“Why? You left anonymous gifts and notes and watched me put on this hunt — which by the way, was for you. And didn’t even say anything when a guy lied and said he was my secret admirer? Is this one big cruel prank?”
“No—”
“Oh! Well then, surely at one point in this whole thing, you felt like you should just tell me?” 
“I was going to.”
“Then where were you when I was just about to head out with that fraud? Maybe if you really liked me and really cared for me, like all those damn notes say, you would have fought for m—”
“I did,” Luke finally raised his voice, his face briefly hardened in an attempt to convey his desperation. His chest heaved, and the way it did almost made you think the anger radiating off every inch of his skin right then was directed towards you. But it wasn’t, and he knew you knew. 
“I confronted him right after he claimed that he was the one who gave you all those things.” 
Invisible ivies rooted your foot to the ground. You gulped, trying to digest the information you were given. However, it finally sunk in when Luke’s hands appeared from behind his back. It was then that you could see the bandage wrapped around his knuckles. Your breath hiccuped in both flattery and worry at the implication of what he had done. The darkness behind those deep hazel-brown orbs reflected a certain side of your best friend that you hadn’t seen before. Although, part of you felt like you wouldn’t mind it.
It made Luke’s blood boil knowing what he dedicated to you from the bottom of his heart was spoiled by ill intentions. Luke should have known better than to carelessly write all the letters and craft those gifts right on his bunk bed, rather than discreetly. 
Once again, the Hermes cabin counselor was pulled back to memories from an hour ago. The way the other boy shot remarks at Luke’s lack of precautions, boasting his wrong-doings like someone incapable of having a guilty conscience. Luke's jaw tightened as the image of the sly smirk on the other Hermes boy's face flashed in his mind, but a wave of satisfaction ran through him as he recalled how quickly that smirk was wiped away by his own fist.
They might be brothers by a fraction, but blood or not, that boy was dead to Luke the second he tried tricking you.
“And no, I wouldn’t have let you go out with a fraudster. Never,” Luke’s eyes softened. “And in case it’s not implied enough: I like you…a lot. I was going to confess but then this guy came along lying,” Luke could feel that tremor returning once more to his fist. He hated that something he built, from scratch, on the foundation of sincerity was momentarily tainted by the hands of a spineless liar. Not only that, he hated witnessing somebody so dear to him getting deceived in such a tasteless manner.
“I also…didn’t want to get hurt. It was starting to seem like you would ever consider me as more than just a friend with the way you were listing out all these other guys. So for a bit there I was considering just keeping quiet…forever” he confessed, eyes now straying away from you and down to his shoes.
You observed your best friend through a new perspective. So your initial suspicions were true. You had thought it was him because all the things you have received hinted to somebody who knew you so well, and who else at camp but Luke knew this many things about you. But ultimately, another part of you — the proclaimed “logical” side — has hyper-analyzed every split second you two have shared and deemed that Luke has not given any true signs of interest in you beyond as a friend. Thus, you dismissed the thought of Luke being your secret admirer.
You know now to trust your gut feelings more.
“Oh, Luke Castellan, you dumb ass…” you spoke softly underneath your breath, but you knew he heard you perfectly clearly from the way he slightly peered up. Your heart almost shattered at the dejected look on your best friend’s face and the thought of him burying his feelings eternally. You sure as hell would not allow that to be this timeline.
“I’ve liked you ever since the day you went out of your way and gave me that first cassette tape,” the marveled look on Luke’s face over your confession made you continue, “I guess I should have known it was you…cause gift giving has always been your love language.” It seemed like the boy was too stunned and struck frozen. However, his shell-shock state didn’t last long, because soon, your best friend’s gaze reverted back to the way he has always looked at you, only slightly more intense.
Your eyes fluttered at the sight of Luke Castellan in front of you at that moment. You were finally able to see the effect you’ve always had on him. The way his lips hung slightly agape, eyes dilated in such a way you were no longer able to see their usual color anymore, chest slightly heaving despite lack of physical reasons for such a reaction. You almost wanted to hit yourself for being such a fool and not spotting these details sooner. 
“Now, Castellan…you have two options,” you stepped closer to him, leaving an appropriate amount of personal space in between. “You either kiss me or—”
Luke grabbed your wrist with his uninjured hand and pulled you in. The same hand-guided your arms around his neck while also effectively eliminating the remaining distance between you two. 
Without hesitation, he kissed you.
Likewise, you returned the action without a second thought. You frankly didn’t care about the rain that was soaking the both of you. Kissing Luke felt like such a natural act that it felt simply like diving home. The way he held you made you feel like you were a national treasure he was so afraid of losing. Gods, you don’t think you mind doing this ever so often.
Though, there was a certain urgency in the way Luke kissed you, as if afraid you’d either vanish or you’d change your mind. You pressed your lips harder against his, hoping he’d understand you didn’t intend on leaving or having a change of heart.
A grunt escaped his throat as you kissed him harder. Oh, Luke Castellan already knew he was in immense trouble. He knew almost immediately that the concerning number of thoughts he had about you each day would only increase tenfold from this day on. He wondered if you could taste all of his unspoken words. If kissing you felt like this, he might as well sign away his heart, body, and mind to you. In fact, he’d sign anything you put in front of him without even considering the fine prints. 
Luke slowly backed you against a tree, giving you a bit of support to lean against whilst shielding the both of you from the heavy rain. He smiled into the kiss as you hummed at his action, feeling it echo against his lips. His heart tugged, almost leaping out of his chest when your hands made their way to both sides of his face, cupping it intently like holding something yours. Yours. Fuck, he loved the sound of that. 
You were the first to break the kiss. The both of you gasped for air while maintaining eye contact. The close-up view of his intense gaze drove your cheeks rosy. You could not help but admire the way his locks of wet curly hair clung onto his forehead, while raindrops fell from his face, some following the length of his eyelashes before falling — Oh, the way he glanced down at your lips at that second made you feel almost like you had the power to convince him into anything at the moment. 
“You’re my best friend…” he broke the silence.
“Mhm.”
“...but what if I want you to be more than that?”
“I can be both,” Luke’s lips broke out into a smile, and you mirrored his facial expression. He leaned his forehead against yours whilst softly rubbing his thumb soothingly against your waist.
“I’m not against that.” 
As a larger grin broke out on your lips, Luke’s eyes further softened. He realized right there and then that anything you wanted, he would not be against it. A breath of relief quietly escaped beneath Luke’s breath. He could not wait for whatever was in store for the both of you in the future.
Good thing his messages in a bottle did get to you.
-------------------------
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subwaysurf45 · 2 years ago
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She’s Not Mad
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Summary: Bucky Barnes was a known people pleaser, it was second nature to him. After meeting you and getting close you both try to navigate his eternal stressed state, working together you try your best to tone down his obsessive ways. 
Words: 9k (if you’ve been wondering where I’ve been...)
Warnings: Bucky has mommy issues, mentions of oral sex, nudity, angst, fluff, college!bucky, slow burn
A/N: thanks for the patience! 
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A Couple of Weeks Ago…
“So, you’re not a thing?” Bucky asked as he shoved his laptop and notebook back into his bag, grabbing the handle of his water bottle and choosing to carry it with him for the walk. 
The two boys were higher up in the rows of the lecture hall as they peered over the two girls talking to the professor. Steve had his eyes drilled into Natasha, the girl standing off to the side as her friend went over a question she had. 
“She told me she is still figuring out her feelings since her last serious relationship,” Steve sighed as he packed up as well, “and I told her I’d wait- apparently this guy’s parents had given their family engagement ring and everything.” 
Bucky pulled the corner of his lips out tight as they began to walk down the stairs, “who’s the other girl?” 
“The one that was just asking the question is Y/N,” Steve watched as both girls left the room, “good friends, met last year, live together now.” 
“She’s cute,” Bucky said purely, no smirk or innuendo.
********
You sat over your laptop in the library with both hands acting as a brim to cover your eyes from the people around you. Tears rolled down your face as you studied the practice question, you felt pathetic and you tried to sniffle as quietly as possible. If anyone saw you silently bawling you’d drop out, it was stupid enough already when the librarian walked over and dropped a tissue box off without saying a word. 
“What do you mean?” you whispered to the page for the hundredth time, hoping for some answer. 
You had done the homework, you went to the study groups, you even extended your prof's office hours because you wanted to make sure you were doing everything right. Yet here you were, sitting alone on a Friday night because you still can’t do the practice assignment. Quitting felt like the only option, it wasn’t like everything was going to click; it was too late. 
This was just going to become the thing that you could never do, simple as that. Sometimes there are subjects that no matter how hard you try, you don’t have the flair. It was a tough pill to swallow but you’d never be able to do any work if you’d continue to hold yourself to a high standard, it was a win to get the little things right, not the entire question. 
The idea of failing was new to you. The jump from high school to college was still something you never adapted to, you always expected nineties on everything and not the mindset that C’s get degrees. 
Trying to do the question was like beating a dead horse, you needed a break. You ran your hands over your face and leaned back in your chair, hearing pops from your back as you did so, until you were leaning back and looking up at the ceiling. When you looked straight you saw someone already staring at you. 
He had longer brown hair that hit his jawline, blue eyes that jumped out at you, and a very concerned look on his face. He was familiar but you didn’t know what it was from. 
“Are you Natasha’s friend?” The guy came up to your empty table. 
“Yeah?” You wiped away your tears, extremely confused as he pulled out the chair right beside you to sit at the eight sided table. 
“I’m good friends with Steve, I think the two of them have something going on- not important, but I kind of know you and I'd rather not leave someone I kinda know alone crying, so…” he rubbed the back of his neck, “are you okay?”
“Do I look okay?” you rolled your eyes and faced your computer again, “the absolute last thing I need is something watching me cry, alright?” your bottom lip wobbled as you kept your eyes away from his at all times. 
He was still staring at you, “come on,” he sighed and moved his hand to comfort you but thought otherwise, “I’m not going to laugh at you or run and tell everyone I know I saw a girl crying in the library- y’know what they’d say?” You could see him tilt his head, “they’d say what’s the big deal, haven’t we all?” 
You scoffed, “no they wouldn’t.” 
“You’re calling me a liar?” 
“I don’t even know your name.”
“Bucky,” he stuck out his hand, “Bucky Barnes.” You shook his hand, “and since I am a Barnes and was raised by my ma I simply can not let this continue, it’s my obligation to either cheer you up or take you home.” 
You scoffed again and tried your best to hide your smile, “and I’m Y/N, and in my family we stress about everything and never give up so I can’t leave until I get this question, so…”
Bucky’s tongue poked the inside of his cheek as he flipped the laptop to face him a little better, “this is the class all four of us have together, alright,” he read over the question and immediately furrowed his brows before looking at you again, trying your best to hold it together. He knew the answer but couldn’t bear to see your reaction, it was painfully obvious you were beating yourself stupid over these questions. 
“Can you take a deep breath for me?” he asked like he was talking to a child. 
“I barely know you, dude,” you crossed your arms and ripped your laptop back to face you, “and I’ll have you know I don’t need a man to come in here and explain everything to me, alright, I’m going to figure this out on my own and I don’t need you, okay? So just head home, tell Steve I say hi.” 
Bucky took a deep breath himself, “that question isn’t marked on the homework, the reason you can’t get the answer is because the way to get it has most likely not been taught yet,” he paused and saw your face crumble, “and I didn’t want to freak you out because you look like you’ve been here a while and you seem to be beating yourself up and I just couldn’t-”
“Stop,” you whispered and covered your face with your hands, “just stop talking.” 
And he did. 
Trying your best to calm your breaths, it didn’t work. So fucking stupid, unbelievable, there’s no way you just spent close to an hour staring at a problem you didn’t even have to do in the first place. 
“Can you walk me home?” you squeeked. 
“Of course,” Bucky stood up right away and started helping you pack your bag, “I have some water, do you want it?” He held up his water bottle. You nodded and began drinking as you both made your way outside and towards your off-campus house. 
“Did you need to study?” you asked as you screwed on the cap. 
Bucky laughed and looked up at the night sky, “I was going for a walk because I heard there was a blood moon tonight, and there is, look,” he point up and saw the red mood looming above both of you, “and I just happened to walk past the library, I looked in the window and recognised your laptop as well as your hair, funny enough,” he laughed as he looked forward again. 
“So you just came in to see me?” you needed to make sure you were hearing this right, it’s not like it happens often. 
“I was going to introduce myself to you actually,” Bucky shrugged and looked over at you, “I know Steve and Nat are trying to figure things out and I thought friends of two people who might date should know one another. Then I saw you crying so I changed my game plan.”
You just nodded, slightly brushing into Bucky’s arm as you walked. It was hard to stay straight with the exhaustion taking over, every now and then you’d brush your knuckles past Bucky’s. He was a cute guy, and something about him being oh so caution around you made you feel important. 
“This is me,” you said later as you walked up the steps, “thanks Bucky, I hope we can be friends.” 
Bucky smiled and stood at the bottom of the steps, “if you ever get in your head again like that and need someone to pull you away, let me know- even in the middle of the night, alright?”
“Alright,” you laughed with your hand on the door handle. 
“I’m serious, Y/N. I look after the people close to me, I look after friends of friends like siblings,” there was no joking in his tone, it seemed other people doubted him on this promise. “I’ll give you my number,” he hand reached out for your phone. 
“I’ll be fine, you seemed to have good luck running into me,” you giggle and open the door to your house. Before it fully closed you felt resistance, looking over your shoulder you saw Bucky holding open your door. 
He was smiling, “then give me your number for another reason.” 
“Oh?” you turned and placed a hand on your chest, “you’re rather forward. 
“Well being cryptic didn’t work, did it?” He laughed and held out his hand again, “come on, I might need a study buddy one day- or even better, a lunch buddy.” you laughed as he tried to duck to meet your eyeline, “you don’t want to be my lunch buddy?”
“I’ll be your lunch buddy,” you giggled and handed him your phone, he wasted no time adding it in. “Goodnight,” you whispered and made it into your house, leaning back and resting against the door. You thought for a moment before breaking into a massive smile, replaying how he tried to keep eye contact with you. Or how he’d been so proud of how his mother raised him- “son of a bitch,” you whispered. 
He walked you back home and cheered you up. 
Just like he said he would. 
A Few Days Later…
Your phone must be hacked or something because your weather app said it would be completely clear today and sunny in the afternoon. As you sat in the cafe you thought it would clear up but it was only getting worse. 
All you needed to do was brave the rain and make your way home, but waiting for the perfect time when everything would let up for a moment was pointless. 
Walking as fast as you can with your head down, you saw your grey sweatpants become a darker shade instantly. It was a straight downpour with absolutely no sign of letting up, you swore you heard thunder when you waited at the crosswalk. Due to your phone lying to you, you had not brought a hooded article of clothing or umbrella so you just had to deal with everything going wrong. 
There definitely was thunder and the lightning was right above you, it seemed like you were the last person on Earth because everyone else was smart enough to stay inside right now; but not you. Down your little street you began to run, trying to get away from the lightning that was chasing you. 
If you could guess you’d say most people who had been struck by lightning most likely thought they were too far away, in denial as the sky opened up from above. It was hard to admit you were actually a little scared at that moment, rain getting in your eyes as you sprinted down to your house that was now in view. 
With your key at the ready you fell inside, slamming the door behind you. 
Natasha rounded the corner, “you idiot, I was trying to call you!” She screamed and saw your state, “Steve and Bucky are over-they drove over they could have picked you up,” Natasha got in your face to peel off the sweater, taking it off right over your head and leaving you in your bralette and those drenched sweatpants. 
“You took off my shirt when there’s boys here?” you whispered as you began to shake, covering your chest with crossed arms. 
“We guessed you were walking back so we put towels in the dryer,” as if on cue Bucky rounded the same corner with your fluffy towel ready, “thank you Bucky,” Natasha wrapped it around your shoulders. 
“Hi, Bucky,” you squeeked, “glad we keep meeting like this.”
Natasha had walked upstairs, most likely getting different pants. Bucky got down on one knee and slipped off your shoes, “like what?” he asked as he looked up, he reminded you of a little puppy somehow. He was as big as a great dane but there was an underlying softness that made you want to hug him or just let him wrap his arm around you. 
You huffed as you pulled the towel tighter, “when I’ve just done something embarrassing and you’re there to save the day.”
Bucky stood up with his arms crossed, “only you would think crying or getting caught in the rain is embarrassing,” he shook his head and reached out to rub your shoulder that was covered by the towel, “I like helping and I like making sure people I know are okay, you know this.”
“I do,” you whispered and walked further in your house. Before you could get anywhere near comfortable Natasha whisked you away to change your soggy pants as well as throw on a sweater, they had also been thrown in the drier, everything was very toasty and warm.
Steve was sitting on the couch, staring intensely at the football game going on. Natasha guided you back in and towards the couch. There was enough room for four of you but you knew thighs would be pressed up against one another, you were okay with that if Bucky was sitting beside you. Though you don’t see him often it was nice when you did even though you made it seem like it was embarrassing. Something about having someone who loves taking care of people take care of you so well caused you to crave it a little more. 
Bucky came around the couch with a mug, “hot chocolate for you,” he whispered and took the spot beside you, next to the arm rest. You thanked him and let your hand slightly burn on the mug when you held it, liking how the warmth began to spread up your arms. Natasha found her spot on the other side of you while Steve stayed on the edge, leaning forward and never looking away from the game. 
“This is really good,” you sipped it and whispered to Bucky, he just smiled and leaned into your side for a moment. 
“What were you working on?” he asked after a moment. 
“I was at the cafe for a little treat but before I was doing my elective course,” you spoke softly. It seemed like everything happened for a reason because you only got food at the cafe which left room for this hot chocolate now. 
“And that is?” Bucky giggled as he leaned forward again. 
“Art history,” suddenly, you were coy. Most people thought your elective was a bird course but to you it was actually interesting, it wasn’t often you were met with a positive response. 
His eyes got wide, “that’s sick!” Bucky readjusted himself off the couch, “I would have never even thought of that course, wow, that’s really cool. So, like, what do you-”
“Bucky, I love you, brother, I really do but-” Steve sighed, “can you please be quiet, this game is very important.” 
“I didn’t think the Big Game was on today?” you asked as you took another sip. 
“It’s not that,” Steve places his beer down, “it’s the State Cup Finals, it’s college football.” 
Natasha smiled and looked over, “his team’s the underdog and are actually on the road to winning the entire thing!” She giggled and linked an arm with Steve who was happy to cuddle up with her, “it’s actually very exciting once you learn the ins and outs of it.”
You just nodded and faced forward again, seeing Bucky out of the corner of your eyes rubbing his thumb on the neck of his beer bottle, staring off into space. The moment you leaned your head on his shoulder he looked over at you, your heart broke when you saw a sad smile. He was just trying to talk to you, he got excited for you and here he was being scolded. 
“Do you want to come look at some of my notes, or are you into this game?” you whispered and saw his eyes light up, both of you quickly stood and headed up stairs with your bag slung over your shoulder. 
The moment you walked into your room you felt everything slow down, Bucky slowly walked in and looked around. He was smiling to himself as he l took in your photos on the walls or posters, even your to do list seemingly growing on the white board you have mounted to one wall. 
You sat on the corner of your bed as he flipped through your notes, “so you’re, like, breaking down these paintings, it's not just the history of when they were painted?”
“Oh yeah,” you fiddled with the hem of your dry sweater, “most of these artist go insane and we look for that in the work or even just what was happening during the time with stuff that you’d learn in a normal history class but we look at if and when it get put into art,” this was your little thing you could talk about for ages, “very cool stuff.” 
Bucky nodded and flipped the pages, “your notes are amazing,” he whispered, “you’re a pretty good student, huh?” he looked over his shoulder and saw you sitting there, just staring at him as he made his way around your room. “What?” he giggled and made his way over to you, holding his hand out to get you to stand up. 
“Nothing,” you tucked your chin to your chest, getting coy at the attention. “You’re just…y’know, sweet.” 
Bucky just smiled and rubbed your arm, giggling as you both stared at one another for a moment. “Do you want to go back down?” 
“Sure,” you nodded and leaned forward, smiling as you both made your way back downstairs. 
The rain still worked its way down your windows as the beers and wine kept flowing. The game had ended a while ago but Steve and Bucky didn’t see a reason to leave, it was a good moment that no one wanted to end. You had finished your hot chocolate and moved onto wine, sipping it slowly as everyone talked. It was nice to be brought into this group even though it stemmed from Nat and Steve, there was good chemistry between the four of you. 
Talking to everyone was effortless, you didn’t need to act like someone else to fit in. no one was yelling over someone else to get their point across, there weren't any passive aggressive tones in anyone's jokes, it was carefree. It was relaxing to have people this easy to talk to. 
The only thing that wasn’t relaxing was the amount of times you caught Bucky staring at you. Everyone had migrated to the floor with their backs against different furniture so you could break out the board games, Bucky was sitting adjacent to you on your right and Steve adjacent on your left, Nat right in front. Every single move whether it be placing a card down or moving your little object around the board Bucky would find a reason to look at you. 
“Good one,” he’d pat your shoulder. 
“Let me move your piece for you,” he’d say before you could reach across the table. 
“Sorry…” he’d smile before taking your little object and moving it back four spots. 
He was very attentive, always watching and scanning. But the more you noticed it the more you figured out he was doing it to everyone, including Steve. Something happened whenever Bucky would either move Steve’s piece for him or go get another beer so he wouldn’t have to stand up, Steve would give this look. It seemed as though he was silently telling Bucky he knew something or he was pointing something out that had been a topic of conversation before. Bucky would try to laugh it off but Steve was very protective of Bucky, you just didn’t know why. 
The games had slowly come to a close, everyone not drunk but a little more than tipsy. Giggles flowed freely around the table as the conversation resumed again, your eyes were growing heavy as you traced the rim of your glass. 
“I’ll be back,” Bucky muttered as he headed to the washroom. 
The moment the door closed Steve sighed, “this kid.” 
“What?” you were getting protective, why was Steve about to talk shit about his best friend? 
Steve just shook his head, “It’s hard to see how badly Winnie fucked him up.” 
Your heart plummeted. Any tiredness had left your body faster than the little gasp escaped your lips. Who was this Winnie girl and why did he mess Bucky up? The thoughts circled your head, was he in an abusive relationship? Natasha looked like she didn’t know either, pouring more wine into her cup. 
When Bucky came back he sat closer to you and you couldn’t help but reach out and wrapped your arm around his. He must have been a little surprised but you rested your head on his shoulder and continued on like it was nothing. 
You were half asleep when Bucky tried to do something for Steve, maybe get him another beer but whatever it was it left Bucky looking like a sad puppy because Steve said, “Buck, relax, I can get my beers, thank you, but I got it, alright?”
Steve's tone was soft but also commanding, he wasn’t annoyed at all. With your eyes closed you pieced it together that Steve was trying to help Bucky in some way, maybe get him to relax a little more. It was out of love but Bucky was very quiet for the rest of the night. 
********
You and Bucky had started hanging out a lot more on your own. There were a lot of late night drives or study sessions, Bucky always came to the library to walk you home if you stayed late or had turned your brain into mush during your studying. 
What Steve had said stuck with you more than you thought it would, it didn’t impact how you saw Bucky but it made you more aware of his people pleasing tendencies. You wanted to do the same as Steve, tell him it was okay but you weren’t as close. You saw how hurt he was the last time and you just couldn’t do it to him. 
Currently you were both sitting on his bed, the movie was wrapping up. Half of his laptop sat on one thigh and the other half sat on Bucky’s, your arms were linked and there was a steady brushing of your thumb on his forearm. In all honesty, you thought you were lulling him to sleep when you looked up five minutes ago to see him fighting his dropping lids. 
When the movie faded to black both of you sat there for a moment, content with the sitcom that was coming up next. You looked up again to see him with his face scrunched up, his other hand was on his back. 
“What is it?” you asked and leaned over, he was rubbing a specific spot on his lower back with his thumb. 
Bucky held his breath as he leaned forward to move his hand, “I was working out this morning and there weren't any belts left for my deadlifts and I did something to my back.”
“Do you want a massage?” you offered, he’d do the same for you. 
“I’m okay, thanks,” he looked down at your head resting on his bicep. 
“I didn’t know you worked out,” you smiled, “you don’t have the, like, bodybuilder physique.”
Bucky laughed and wiped at his eyes, giggling to himself before answering. “I don’t want that look, but…” you could see the boast on the top of his tongue, he poked his tongue on the inside of his cheek. 
“Tell me!” you sat up, taking the laptop off your lap so you could fully face him now, “are you, like, ripped or something?” you both laughed as he hugged himself so you couldn’t feel or see anything, “you are, shut up!” you placed both hands on his shoulders, his face so red from laughing and embarrassment you just wanted to take a bite out of it. 
“Steve calls it a sleeper build,” Bucky managed to wheeze out, he was trying to play-fight you off of him. 
“What the fuck is that?!” you gasped as your hands reached out but he copied you and intertwined his fingers with yours. 
“It’s when someone has muscle but you can’t really see it in normal clothing,” his face was calming down as well, but that stupid smile was still on his face. “It just kinda happened, just how I am.”
You tried to move his arms around but you couldn’t, his fingers were still tightly woven with yours. You just laughed and fell back into him, cuddling up again. “I had a friend's mom who was an actual masseuse, so…” you shrugged, “I actually know what I’m doing because she’d give me massages and walk me through her process.”
“You just want to take my shirt off, don’t you?” Bucky taunted. 
“I want to make sure you’re not uncomfortable the entire time we hang out and for the rest of the week,” you giggled before snuggling into his arm again and watching the show that had come on randomly. 
It took three days before Bucky came back for that massage. 
You were hanging out again like normal and he was still trying to relieve the ache in his lower back. It was becoming sad to see him so uncomfortable so you kept reminding him of your excellent massage skills. After what you counted as his third groan of pain you just looked at him and soon enough he was asking you to turn around so he could take his shirt off and lie down. 
Choosing your angle to stand with your back to him was a science, you wanted to make sure you had the mirror to look at but you also didn’t want to make it obvious. Part of you hated yourself for wanting to catch and peek at his body but it was infamous now, you just had to look. 
And my god was it worth it. 
It wasn't an obnoxious amount of muscle that made it seem like the strength drained from his brain and into his arms. The sleeper build comment was right, you had no idea. His chest made you feel comfortable and protected, the kind of chest you’d want to fall into when the subway starts up too quick and you’re not holding onto anything. His arms were, and you already knew this, amazing at covering so much surface area for hugs. They were secure and trustworthy, you knew that when you hugged him he had you; it also helped to remember when he’d whisper it in your ear. 
“Okay,” his voice was muffled by pillows at the top of your bed. 
You turned around and were greeted by his back which was also an amazing sight, the kind of body sculptors would use and their go-to subject if no one else was there. “I have some lotion on my hands,” you warned and pressed your palms onto his back and quickly began spreading the lotion around. 
Though this wasn’t a proper table and he was resting on one cheek instead of face down you knew this was the best he’d get for a college kid. You started all over and slowly worked your way to focusing on his lower back. When you felt the knot you knew you found it, the thing was massive. The low groan Bucky let out was close to pornographic as you dug into him. 
Something about seeing him grip the sheets, making his veins pop out, did something to you. At first you only really saw Bucky as another friend or a good member of the friend group you stumbled your way into. But the more you spent one-on-one the more you realized he was your perfect guy. Any guy can be perfect physically but his personality enhanced your view for him, it made you appreciate his looks even more. 
His laugh always brought out the crinkle in his nose and those pretty teeth, the sound of him giggling was music to your ears and also was the perfect accompaniment to his squinted eyes or broad smile. The same with his little fist pumps he does when beating you at a game either around a group of friends of a video game, that stupid celebration he does every time causes him to flex his bicep but that’s secondary to the little circles he makes with his fist.  
You kept working away and looking at his rested face once in a while, seeing his eyes closed and the relieved look on his face. There was something so pure about watching the guy your slowly obsession over fall into simple relaxation all because of you, it was a treat. 
“How’s that?” you whisper, “Bucky?” trying to make sure your pressure wasn’t too hard for him you wanted to check in, but he had fallen asleep. With the opportunity in front of you, you reached out and placed your bent knuckles along his cheek, feeling the stubble tickle your fingers. 
You found him blanket on his bed and covered him up so he wouldn’t get cold with his shirt off, before leaving you placed a kiss on his forehead before heading downstairs for a snack. You also wanted to give him space, let him sleep peacefully. 
Steve was down there when you got there, another roommate of his cooking as you found Bucky’s section of snacks to choose from. 
“Where’s Bucky?” Steve asked as he looked over his shoulder, not for long due to the football playing on the TV. 
“Sleeping upstairs,” you ate the goldfish as you rounded the couch to watch the game. 
He seemed taken aback at your casualness, “what did you guys do…?” he slowly looked over, most likely trying to see if your hair was disheveled or anything was blossoming on your neck. 
“I gave him a massage,” you shrugged and fell back onto the couch, “his lower back has been killing from his workout a while ago.” 
You could see Steve look over his shoulder to see if his roommate was also hearing this, he looked over at you again and squinted. “So- and correct me if I’m wrong here- you gave Bucky a massage and put him to sleep and now you’re down here getting a snack?” 
“You would be correct,” you smiled, “would you like to do a once over of my neck for hickies or maybe rummage through the trash for condoms?” you sassed and plopped a few more goldfish in your mouth, “I was helping him.” 
That statement made Steve look over his shoulder again. The roommate just shrugged with a smile before heading down to his room in the basement, noodles steaming from the cup. You just looked at Steve as he tried to piece together everything, it was actually funny to see him try to understand. 
“Bucky doesn’t accept help from anyone,” Steve turned to face you, “it’s his thing to never want to be in debt with anyone when it comes to favours of any sort.” 
“Well,” you just sighed, “I’ve been picking up on that too but I got to him I guess, he let me do something for him.” That was all you could say because you didn’t have a full background of why Bucky didn’t accept help from anyone you just knew he didn’t; the only clues you had were Winnie and her role in this. 
“That’s good,” Steve quickly added, “I’m far from saying it’s bad, trust me, it’s just he’s been in a funk for a while when it comes to that stuff, it ebbs and flows.” 
“Do you think he’ll ever tell me?” you asked as you watched the game, too embarrassed of the question to look at Steve. It seemed there was this vital piece of information that made Bucky who he was that was dangling right in front of your face, you were falling for him but that thing that made him him was out of reach. When Steve first made the statement he siad that this Winnie girl fucked him up which implied something bad much have happened and that can also mean something isn’t necessarily right. You were never going to fix Bucky but you did want to understand so you could help be a better friend to him and not unconsciously get in the way of his mindset. 
Steve nodded, “he’ll definitely tell you,” he looked over and smiled, “I mean, you’re all he ever talks about, this kid is head over heels for you  it’s just…some guys have hard times coming to terms with their past, he’ll get there though.” 
“I know,” you nodded, “I’ll obviously never force it out but I do want him to be aware I’m here to listen, y’know?” 
“He knows,” Steve laughed and stood up, going to the cupboard and grabbing a little snack for himself as well. 
You took a deep breath before standing up and heading back upstairs, you were guessing Bucky was still fast asleep. When you opened the door you found him still laying on his bed in the exact same position, only now there was little snores coming from him. 
With a pout you crawled back onto the bed and sat next to him, placing your hand on his back and sliding it down to his arm that was bent up so his hands could rest under the pillow. Your thumb gently rubbed his arm for a moment before pulling out your phone and scrolling through it. 
The boredom ate away at you, instead of scrolling through your phone you went to his dresser to find some clothes you could change into so you could crawl under his sheets and sleep over. When you pulled open his top drawer you were met with his underwear and socks as well as a box of condoms tucked to the side, you just giggled to yourself at the painfully college male sight in front of you. 
Something about wearing his boxers made your face heat up, that was a level of intimacy you wanted to reach with him one day but you didn’t know if it was time. Looking over your shoulder after a particularly loud snore you smiled to yourself and picked up a black pair, as you held it up you remember seeing the waistband sticking out of his jeans while he reached above his head to grab something for someone - you weren’t focused on his actions at the time. 
Quickly slipping your pants off and pulling up the boxers you maneuvered to his closet, finding your favourite hoodie he wore very often. This moment of intimacy, moving around Bucky’s room while he wasn’t aware, caused a surge of confidence to shoot through you. Though you had never talked to Bucky about what the relationship between you was, you knew both of you could agree there was no room for girlfriends or boyfriends for either of you, this was the time to build the foundation for something better later. Having this idea of only being the girl in his room you took off your bralette and tucked it back in his top drawer, across from the condoms.
You didn’t choose this bra specifically but you were wearing a slightly lacey bralette, it was far from lingerie but the lace added something to it. Making sure you put it where it wouldn’t be obvious but also not hiding it, you grew giddy at the image of Bucky finding it. 
Before getting in his bed you tugged and tugged the sheets under his body before managing to get the covers fully out from under him. You scooted in and pulled the sheets up to cover both of you, it seemed he really needed the sleep because nothing was waking him up, not even the little hug you gave him before turning off the lights and falling asleep beside him. 
********
You were sitting in class aimlessly scrolling through your phone during your five minute break in your lesson, your art history professor was one of the best teachers you've ever had. She was funny but also well informed, she also had a big heart and didn’t need a eulogy as a form of proof if someone asked for an extension due to a funeral service that day. 
Bucky: What the hell is in my dresser? 
Without knowing the tone or context your heart dropped. You read the text with Bucky’s voice as if he was screaming at you, a hint of embarrassment in his tone. It was in your head, you didn’t know if it was a flirty tone either. 
You: Just my bra, when I stayed over a couple of nights ago I changed into your clothes and just absentmindedly put my bra in your top drawer. I probably was just going through the motions and thought I was at my place. 
Bucky: Can I pick you up from class, when does your lecture end?
Something about him completely disregarding your explanation - lie or not - gave you the worst feeling in the world. Ice poured down your back as you watched your prof make her way back up to the little stage she teaches on, you couldn’t keep the conversation going and just needed to deal with it later. 
You: sure, it ends in an hour. 
Bucky: I’ll be there. 
Part of you didn’t want to leave when your lecture was over, you stayed in the hallway for a moment and thought of every single end of the world situation that could happen in the car. Bucky didn’t seem like a guy who hit women but your anxiety didn’t let you leave out that thought. He also didn’t seem like the guy who’d reveal he’d been dating another girl the entire time but who knows, he could be in a three year long relationship as you stood there. 
With all these terrible situations playing out in your head you decided to face it head on, you’d walk in there and wouldn’t let him talk; just saying your apologies with your eyes closed before he could get a word out. 
You walked down the steps and to the right to find Bucky’s car parked in front, coming up in the blindspot. You took a moment to take a deep breath, opening the door and sitting down as quickly as possible. 
“Do you-”
“Bucky,” you put your hand out but kept your eyes casted down, “I am so unbelievably sorry if I made you uncomfortable, I don’t know if you already have a girlfriend and she found it and it caused a rift in your relationship, or if you like to sleep with other girls and one of them found the bra and got jealous so you lost your credit. I don’t know what made you angry but please, I am so sorry for what I did, I wasn’t thinking and I just put it in there and I-...” you just held your mouth open as you looked at the center console, you had run out of things to say. “Um,” you slowly looked up to see him frozen in shock, mouth still slightly open from when he began to say something, “sorry, you were about to say something?” 
Bucky had to physically rattle his head to get out of the shock he was in, “do you want to get some coffee?” 
Your eyes flicked up and it was your turn to stay frozen, “what?” 
Bucky pulled his brows together, “I was making a joke about the bra thing,” he seemed concerned at your extremely anxious state, “I don’t care what you leave at my place, I really don’t,” normally someone would laugh in awkward situations but Bucky didn’t, it felt like it made everything worse. “Do you want coffee?” 
“What is going on?” you couldn’t believe the situation you had put yourself in, nothing was making sense. 
“Don’t get all mad at me,” now it was time for him to scoff, “you’re the one that thought I was sleeping with multiple women while I’m actively pursuing you, you idiot.” 
“Don’t call me an idiot,” you huffed and faced the front of the car, crossing your arms after putting on your seatbelt. 
Bucky laughed as he reached over and turned your face so you’d look at him, “that’s what you took from that statement?” He giggled, “babe, I just said I was pursuing you, does that just fly over your head?” 
“Wait, what?” you grew more interested, “you want to date me?” 
Bucky nodded, “have I not made it obvious?” You just shrugged and began to feel small, curling yourself further into the seat of his car, “I would like to take you out and I would like to continue to collect little pieces of you at my place while doing the same to yours, does that make sense?” 
“Then what were those condoms for?” 
“The same reason our house keeps tampons in our main bathroom,” Bucky put the car in drive and began working towards to coffee shop, “if you ever need a tampon you go and grab one, if Steve ever needs a condom and he’s out of stock in his room he comes to me,” Bucky looked at you at the stop light. 
“Oh,” was all you could say. 
“But let me get a few things straight,” Bucky placed his hand on your thigh, “I’m not sleeping with other girls, I do not have a secret girlfriend, I am not mad you left your bra in my dresser and I tried to make the text seem flirty, and finally,” he went at the green, “I really like you and I would like you to be my girl whenever we get there.” 
“Okay,” you whispered, “I’d like that too.” 
“Then it’s settled,” it was a short drive to the cafe, “let’s celebrate over coffee, shall we?” 
You looked down at his hand on your thigh, “yeah, we shall.” 
********
Your body felt like it was floating, your legs tingled and it was hard to catch your breath. As you laid on your back with your hands on your bare stomach Bucky worked his way back up from between your legs while leaving kisses on your hip bones as well as your stomach when you lifted your hands. 
“How was that?” Bucky asked breathlessly, licking his lips before kissing you. 
You kept your answer waiting, probably because he knew it already, kissing him slowly as he wanted. He was fully in control right now, setting the pace and tone of this entire afternoon. When he pulled away for a moment you complimented him like always, your hands reached up to his shoulders and tried to push him to lay on his back but he stayed strong. 
“Flip over,” you whispered and ran your hands down his chiseled stomach, working your way up to his shoulders as your fingernails raked up his back. 
“I’m all good,” he shrugged. 
“But you’re painfully hard,” you tried again to get him to move but he just fell beside you on his stomach, not allowing you to touch him where he was in fact, extremely hard. “Come on, you always do this.” 
“Don’t worry about it,” he smiled and pulled you down with him. 
“I just want to do something nice for you, you never let me do anything for you or give you any favours,” in your head it seemed like a normal observation, it was true that Bucky didn’t let anyone do anything for him while he actively tried to help everyone in anyway he knew how. 
That seemingly struck a nerve, “alright then,” he sighed and got up from the bed, heading into the bathroom as he left you naked and alone on his bed, the most lonesome feelings in the world. 
“Where are you going?” you sat up, grabbing your shirt from the edge of the bed. 
“Going to go jerk off in the shower,” he said as he closed the door. 
“You can’t be serious,” you quickly stood and made your way to the bathroom that was connected to his room. You opened the door to see him already adjusting the tap before starting the shower. “Bucky, it’s the truth, it’s who you are but it’s the truth and as your girlfriend I want you to feel good, I want to give you pleasure like you do to me.” 
You reached forward and placed your hands on his back, slowly working your way to his shoulders so you could turn him around. There looked like shame had overtaken him as he stood before you, though he was larger in size he shrunk himself down to look small. His mouth opened and closed a couple of times, he didn’t know what to say. 
“If I can’t give you head then can I come in the shower and wash your hair?” you didn’t even put on the shirt you grabbed, it was dropped to the floor. “Come on, honey, it’ll feel so good.” 
Bucky only nodded before stepping into the hot shower with you. You made sure he got most of the stream on him, you stayed in front and made sure his hair was soaked before getting any product. You could see his tenseness at first but the moment your hands made contact with his scalp his eyes rolled back, his shoulders relaxed. In that moment it occurred to you that you had actually never seen his relaxed state before. 
“Doesn’t this feel good?” you whispered, making sure you used your nails to really cleanse his scalp. “Doesn’t letting yourself relax and breathe feel so good, Buck?” 
“Yeah,” it came out quiet and broken. 
Your eyes were focused on his hair the entire time, making sure you lathered up and took your time. You needed to savor this moment for both you and Bucky, you wanted him to be relaxed for a s long as possible as well as taking advantage of doing him a favour; never knowing when your next opportunity would come up. 
Gently tapped his forehead, you got him to lean back. The water immediately took off the top layer of suds but you needed to rub out the deeper layers as well. Your fingers scrubbed until the trail of water rolling down his body was pure water and had no shampoo in it. 
“I’m going to- oh, my gosh Bucky,” you reached out and saw his red eyes, “when did you start crying?” 
“I can’t remember,” he whispered and tilted his head down, the water pushed his hair to cover his eyes. 
You pushed his hair back and pulled him out a step further so the water hit his back, your thumbs quickly wiped away a mixture of water and tears off of his face. He couldn’t stop crying as you tried your best to keep his face clear, “honey, what’s wrong?” 
“I-” he choked on his own words, “I’ve never let my guard down this much,” he admitted before breaking off into harder sobs, you swooped in and pulled him tightly against your chest. 
“I know it’s a new feeling,” you whispered, “but I want you to be able to do this all the time, let your guard down around me,” it was a shot in the dark by saying this but you did it anyways, “I promise I won’t hurt you, I’ll never take advantage of your guard down, love.” 
It must have struck something because his knees buckled, his hands gripped tighter as he desperately kept you close to him. You didn’t know if you were making him feel better or worse but the act of letting go was needed for him, you kept holding him until there was nothing left to cry. 
When he pulled away he stayed close, close enough that you kissed him under the gentle rain of the shower and played with his hair at the base of his scalp. His hands stayed on your back and held you close to him, making sure you were always touching him in some way. You tried to get a good read on him but he kept his head low and gently ran his hands up and down your sides, just feeling you. 
“You’re very safe,” you whispered. 
Bucky looked up at you for a moment before keeping his eyes down for a while, his brows pulled together and it seemed like he was trying to say something but didn’t know how. Both of you were open and vulnerable, naked in the hot shower. Tears threatened to spill over at the picture of Bucky crying in front of you. 
“It was my mom,” Bucky whispered, “the one who broke me-”
“You’re not broken,” you quickly corrected, cupping his face and stroking his cheek with your thumb, “don’t say that.” 
Bucky just shrugged, “I’m the oldest, I have four sisters younger than me - all different dads.” Bucky took a deep breath and pulled you closer, “my mom…Winnie was an interesting woman who never wanted to be pregnant but somehow always ended up pregnant anyways, it also didn’t help none of the guys wanted to stick around.” 
You wrapped your arms around his neck, giving him the easy opportunity to hug you if he needed to. Nodding along, you encouraged him to keep going. 
“When my mom realized I could do the dirty work she would take advantage of that. I basically raised my sisters and somehow she managed to worm into my head,” he let out an angry laugh, “she’d say she loved me if I did things for her and I was a bad boy if I couldn’t or wouldn’t help her, she would say I didn’t love her if I didn’t change my sister’s diapers or bathe them while she sat on the couch.” 
“Bucky,” you were the one to instigate the hug, “that’s awful.” 
“And I’m aware of how I act now, all I’ve ever known is helping other people to make sure they love me,” he laughed again, “and it sounds stupid but I can never break out of the cycle, I always think I’m doing a good job or not being overbearing but then I start to second guess myself, you know?” he pulled away and looked at you, you quickly nodded. “I start to think about what people are saying behind my back and so I keep doing what I’m doing to stay on the safe side, I know it’s fucking annoying but I can’t help it.” 
“It’s not annoying, baby” you leaned past him and turned off the water as it grew cold, “and if you’ll let me I can help with that, I don’t want to fix you or change you, I just want you to be comfortable in this relationship and not think I’m secretly mad at you because you didn’t get me a glass of water.” 
Bucky nodded, stepped out of the shower with you and grabbed two towels. The conversation had naturally ended, Bucky didn’t have anything else to say. It was hard not to think he was overthinking again, the idea that you were causing him to stress out stressed you out. You were being truthful when you said you wanted him to be relaxed in this relationship, the last thing you wanted was underlying tension. 
Back in bed Bucky rolled over and cuddled into your breasts, holding you closely as you watched his head rise with your breath. You had no idea if he was asleep or not, you knew he wouldn’t mind either way if you played with his hair. 
“Thank you,” was all he whispered before falling asleep. 
********
You all sat around the couch to watch another big game. Though you had no idea what was going on you were just as into it as Steve. Half time had just started and you all took a collective breath, the two college teams were close. 
“Want another beer?” you asked as you stood up, looking at Bucky who was sitting on the couch. Steve and Nat had already filled up, you wanted another cooler and Bucky was almost done. 
“Yeah,” he quickly downed his final sip of beer before handing the bottle off to you. 
There was this anticipation in the room, you smiled and took the bottle and walked past Steve who was already looking at Bucky. The room seemed still when Bucky didn’t move, just pulling out his phone to look at something while the commercials played. Before making it into the kitchen you looked over your shoulder and saw the back of Bucky’s head, you bit your lip to suppress the smile that was growing. 
The moment you got back and sat next to him Bucky took your hand and pulled it into his lap. He fidgeted with your finger before looking over at you, “how’d I do?” he whispered. 
You laughed and leaned into his side, “how much did that make your cringe?” 
“I was in pain for a moment,” he answered as fast as possible before giggling with you as you clink your glasses together and take a long swing. With a deep breath he looked back at the game and kept your hand in his. Bucky must have not been paying attention but his phone buzzed, illuminating and accidentally showing his lockscreen. 
It changed from the photo of the two of you to a black background with white writing on it: 
Trust me, she’s not mad at you.
********
Thanks for reading, feel free to reblog and tell me what you think!
Taglist: @jackiehollanderr​ @tylard-blog1​ @readingbooksanddrinkingtea-blog​ @linzc-reader​ @hotleaf-juice​ @honeybunchesofbucky​ @seybox​ @yaszx​ @happyt0exist​ @striving4averagegirl​ @searchf0rtheskyline​ @aya-fay​ @wbyss​ @luvrsbian​ @albertdabuttler​
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elucubrare · 1 year ago
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What are your biggest turn-offs when reading/watching historical fiction or retellings of myths?
this is really complicated - i can put it in two boxes, both of which are packed very full.
disconnection from the material reality of the past
when characters display a very specifically modern mindset (about social issues especially, but other stuff too)
(I also get bothered by some kinds of modern language - I don't mind it when, idk, an author uses "sensible" with the modern connotation of "practical" and not the 18th century "emotional" or "empathetic", but "yeah" or "okay," or even, as i found out when someone used it in medieval fantasy, "holy shit" will get on my nerves.)
there are modern things where (made up example!) a character who's supposed to be a cook will talk about making caprese salad for a fancy restaurant in December, and someone snarking on the book will say "yeah, right, they should know better than to make something that depends on a fresh summer vegetable!" and even with greenhouses, that's pretty fair. and that's even more extreme in the past. it's 1650 in Verona, it's December, you cannot obtain fresh tomatoes. i don't think this means that people in the past were, necessarily, more emotionally or spiritually in tune with the cycle of the year, or the labor it took to get clothes, or furniture, or any other material item, and of course wealth can insulate people from some of that difficulty, but it does mean that the seasons had more direct impact on people's lives. It's possible to, for example, buy clothes ready-made, but for anything fancy, it's more likely that it'll be made to fit if it's new, or altered extensively and painstakingly if it's not. that means that tearing or staining a fancy dress isn't just an issue of looking bad - you can't just replace it, and you probably won't throw it out - you figure out how to reuse it. those concerns of access to material goods are just a lot closer to the surface of the world than they often are now.
my objections to modern attitudes about the world are not that people in the past 100% accepted the views of their contemporaries - there were always people who didn't, and it makes sense that a protagonist would be one of them. but people wouldn't phrase those objections in the same way that modern people would - say your main character doesn't want a woman accused of being a witch burned. "God's power is such that the Devil cannot give this woman the ability to sour milk" is most likely going to be more persuasive to the crowd than "witches aren't real." and sometimes that's rough - it's not super fun to read about a Roman with Roman attitudes about provincial wars, or slavery in the city, but I put something down because a Roman character said (in internal dialogue) that he was disgusted to see that a man had been tortured because "Romans simply didn't do that." Historical Romans did do that, routinely - a slave could not testify in a law court unless they had been tortured. Even with distasteful things like that, I'd much rather it just be glossed over than to have them say the "correct" modern thing. It just makes it feel too much like the theme park version of the culture.
Both of these are because of specific things I come to historical fiction for - I want that sense of alienation, the gulf of experience. I hate that most historical fiction (and fantasy set in semi-recognizable periods) characters don't really care about Honor, except as a joke, because I love when characters organize their lives around arcane rules and systems that cause tiny things to escalate into blood feud. I just think they're neat! I like it when people's worldviews are shaped by their lack of scientific certainty about what causes crops to fail! If I wanted to read about people who thought and acted like me, and had lives that were mostly similar to mine, only cooler, I'd just read contemporary fiction.
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chososhairbuns · 3 months ago
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update: writing-prompt-s continues to double down on painting 90-ghost as an unreliable scammer
after this post i made about writing-prompt-s being a complete and total dickweed started spreading around, i honestly thought i'd be done with them for the time being, but someone in the reblogs of that post called something to my attention, and i'm completely and utterly disgusted. i don't care anymore at this point, i just don't want ANYTHING related to writing-prompt-s and their racism towards palestinians passing under the radar, hence this new post. please, if you remember reblogging the first post, reblog this one too, because i think this is an important follow-up. and if you somehow missed all of this until now and you have no idea what this is about, the post i linked explains pretty much all you need to know because i'm not gonna bother going over old info right now.
i thought writing-prompt-s quietly deleting their shitty racist post was a real coward move but i figured that they wouldn't do anything other than pretend like they never said anything and hope that this all blows over for them eventually. but apparently they can't stfu because, in the wake of everyone pointing out to them that 90-ghost aka ahmed has had tumblr for 12 years, they made this post:
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i'm completely speechless that even in the face of intense backlash and overwhelming evidence to the contrary that they'd rather double down on attacking ahmed's identity than admit to being wrong. a few of the other dumbasses who accused palestinians of being scammers, while never exactly apologizing, at least backtracked on what they said and went "okay well maybe some of them are legit," but this cunt can't even do that. and what's more, they're doing it in this weird underhanded way where people who aren't in the know (and even some who are) wouldn't understand what they're trying to do here. you know, because they're a little bitch who can't even be open about the fact that they're a virulent racist, so they choose to only express it using subtle tactics.
anyway the screenshotted post is in the wayback machine already in case writing-prompt-s chooses to do the expected thing and delete it in the same way they deleted their initial post.
seriously, we need to wreck this guy.
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keigosdear · 5 months ago
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{bad idea... right? - kuroo t.}
yes I know that he’s my ex, but can’t two people reconnect?//…I just tripped and fell into his bed.
kuroo x fem!reader smut. exes to lovers. 18+ MDNI please.
in which you and your ex "reconnect" after almost half a year apart, but with so many unresolved feelings, it'll either end up being the best or worst idea you've ever had.
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warnings: fem!reader, no physical description (aside from specific genitalia ofc). university setting. smut, mentions of alcohol/getting drunk but no drunk sex, lots of feelings/kinda mutual pining. praise kink, a little bit of voice kink, very brief jealous reader, cunnilingus, body worship, teasing, lots of pet names in lieu of y/n, soft dom!kuroo and sub!reader, very. very. soft, kinda emotional sex, aftercare and fluff towards the end. porn with a bit of plot/build up. this fic is my baby.
a trope I never thought I'd write plus a genre I've never written before? apparently so. it's my first time writing smut, so constructive criticism is welcomed, being rude is not. can you believe I started this over the summer ‘23 and I'm only posting it now?
and lmk if I need to add anything else to the warnings :)
divider credit to: @/cafekitsune
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
this truly had the potential to be one of your worst ideas yet.
you weren't even going to be at this damn party to begin with, but your friend finally convinced you to go with her after a week of wearing you down.
"it'll be fun, c'mon!" she begged.
the only reason you didn't want to go was because you were finally done with your first semester of classes and wanted to wind down in peace, not at a crowded house party filled with loud music and sweaty drunk university students.
but of course you relented when she pulled out the puppy dog eyes and played the "but we haven't hung out in months, I miss you!" card.
so there you were by the snacks and refreshments table, dressed up and nursing a drink, talking and laughing with your friends. truthfully, you were having a better time than you thought you would and figured that you had almost a month before classes started back up again to relax.
"soooo? has anyone caught your eye yet?" multiple faces focused their attention on you.
you knew part of the reason your friend had insisted on you going with her was to help you meet someone. she'd never admit it, but it was pretty obvious with the way she was pointing out people left and right, making note of how attractive they were. at one point she had even "accidentally" pushed you into one of her targets, which had made for some very awkward small-talk on your end with someone you had zero interest in and some giggling from her.
it's not that you were opposed to the idea of finding someone, but in all honesty, no one had caught your eye. recently you had gotten out of a long long term relationship, and starting over after that just seemed so... unappealing to you.
it also seemed unfair to start anything new when you were very much not over him. breaking up in the middle of the semester had made it really easy for you to push down any emotions and throw yourself into your studies. but it didn't change the fact that you missed him. even now, the party acted as a good distraction for you.
or so you thought.
you were about to respond when your phone buzzed. you looked down and your heart leapt into your throat when you saw the contact name.
it felt strange seeing it as "kuroo" rather than some version of his given name or a pet name. once you hit the one minute mark of just staring at the text notification in shock, your friend peeked over your shoulder and gasped a little.
"you didn't block him?!"
you snatched your phone out of her hand after she stole it to show your group of friends.
"why would I? it's not like we hate each other."
and it was true- you both ended amicably (though very reluctantly). you only ever wanted the best for each other, and while it was sad, you realized that at this point in your lives with how busy you both were, you weren't able to offer that anymore.
you’d rather this than end things resenting each other.
still, it was a hard pill to swallow, so for now you were just holding it on your tongue, letting the bitter taste of the coating settle instead.
she frowned. "well yeah, but-"
you cut her off before she could bring up the very emotions you were ignoring in that moment and shoved your phone back in your pocket. "c'mon, let's go dance!"
later, though, when you excused yourself to the bathroom, the first thing you did was down your second drink and read the text.
hey.
do you want to come over?
you stared at the messages for another minute, reading and re-reading them over and over again before sighing. being with him for years meant you knew him like the back of your hand, and he wasn't one for casual hook ups or one night stands. you hadn't even heard from him in a few months- this was the first bit of contact you'd had with him since you cleaned out your drawer of clothes at his place.
which meant he was either drunk and missing you or someone was playing a prank and you'd just end up a fool.
seriously weighing the options in front of you, trying not to let your emotions overpower your decision making, you attempted to think about the long term consequences of going over.
no matter how you spun it, it sounded like a bad idea. even if he did send the texts, there was no guarantee he wanted anything out of it.
but you were too tipsy for logic at that point in the night, and if you were being honest with yourself, you were in need of some excitement.
yeah.
I'll send my new address.
wait, he moved?
despite being together for so long, the two of you never ended up living together, opting for dorms and student houses with friends. still, you did spend a lot of time at his old place, and before the breakup you had even talked about the possibility of moving in together after the current school year was done.
you didn't linger on the sour feelings that brought up and instead decided to let your friends know you were leaving. when they asked where you were going, you spun some lie about not feeling well and wanting to head home before you got worse. you didn't really care if they believed you or not.
checking the address he had sent you once more, you made your way out of the house and were pleasantly surprised to realize it wasn't that far of a walk, especially since you were wearing uncomfortable party shoes.
you sipped on the bottle of water you swiped form the refreshment table and tried to sober up a bit more before seeing him. you weren't a hundred percent sure what would happen once you got there, but it was a good idea to be prepared for anything.
eventually you made it up to his apartment, which was in another student housing building off campus, bigger than his old place, and took a moment to compose yourself.
there was still time to turn back and make an excuse for why you bailed.
there was still time to think it through.
there was still time to save yourself from the possibility of more pain.
you took a deep breath and knocked on the door anyway.
not even five seconds later, the door was opening and you were face to face with your ex boyfriend.
you took him in for the first time in months- really took him in. sure, you'd seen his instagram posts since breaking up, but you could only zoom in so far on those. and fine, maybe your friends had tried to set you up with people they had deemed "much hotter", but you never saw the appeal. you couldn't even remember any of their faces in that moment, because kuroo was right there.
his hair was the same as always, slightly messier than usual, exactly how it looked whenever he (or you) would run his hands through it on a particularly stressful day.
had he been stressed about the text? did he regret it?
he was dressed somewhat casually, in a dark red shirt you recognized as part of a birthday gift you gave him one year (you had always liked the colour red on him). he was wearing black sweatpants and his socks were mismatched.
everything about him was familiar, and you hated the way a feeling of ease settled over you when he finished his own analysis of you and gave a boyish, almost giddy grin. "hi."
his voice was warm and gave you butterflies. there was an undertone of excitement in his greeting and it quelled your worries about him regretting the texts.
you decided to smile back, though somewhat shyly (which you inwardly scolded yourself for), and spoke up. "hi."
he didn't let the silence that followed settle into awkwardness. he opened the door a bit wider, and welcomed you in. ever the gentleman, he took your coat and and helped you balance as you took your shoes off. you tried to ignore how warm and gentle his touch was, how it made you immediately crave more.
you made your way into the living room and took everything in. there were empty cans and shot glasses littered across the room, mostly concentrated on the coffee table. you thought you heard him swear under his breath when he looked at the mess as well.
"did you have a party?" you asked, now close enough to smell a bit of alcohol on him.
he shook his head and looked a bit embarrassed. "ah, no..." he rubbed a hand over the back of his neck and sighed. "my roommates went out with some friends tonight and decided to pre-game here. I went back to my room before they left because I didn't feel like drinking too much and assumed they'd clean up a bit..."
you nodded in understanding. "wishful thinking, huh?"
he chuckled. "yeah, guess so," he said, then gestured to an empty spot on the couch. "sit, I'll just get some of this out of the way quickly."
"oh, I can help-" you tried to offer but he waved you off.
"don't worry about it. I'm the one who invited you into a sloppy apartment, you shouldn't have to clean up a mess that isn't yours."
you snorted and watched as he shoved a ton of cans into the decorative waste bin by the sofa and took some glasses to the sink in the kitchen. "says the one who's cleaning up a mess that isn't his."
you heard him laugh at your words and the butterflies erupted in your stomach again. you hadn't realized how much you missed that sound. suddenly your mind wandered back to the reason behind his invitation. you'd be alone tonight?
once he returned from the kitchen and sat down next to you, you talked for a bit. he caught you up on the moving situation (him and a few friends found an opening for the second semester, so they decided to jump on it and try to stay until grad, hopefully. he made a joke about trying to make friends with the landlord). you listened closely, trying not to make it obvious you were hanging off his every word.
when he was done, you caught him up on your life and how you were at a party when he texted. he apologized for interrupting and you told him a little too fast not to be, which he seemed pleased with.
after a while, he asked if you wanted to watch a movie. you agreed, though you were starting to get impatient. you knew he wasn't the type of guy to ever expect anything from anyone, but the curiosity was eating you alive. you couldn't help but finally ask him about it halfway through the movie.
"hey... why did you invite me tonight?"
he didn't seem surprised by your question, which told you he was probably expecting it. (it was silly of you to think he couldn't tell when something was on your mind after years together and only months apart.)
he took a deep breath in and looked down at his lap. while he didn't look outwardly nervous, you knew him well enough to know what his tells were. he picked at a thread on his pants, trying to compose himself before dropping the bomb.
"because I missed you." he looked you in the eye and then continued. "a lot. and you can take that however you'd like. I'll let you decide."
you blinked at him. he'd let you decide? the way he said it implied that he missed you, missed you. not just missed having you in his life, not just as a friend- he missed you.
you would be nothing but a liar if you said you hadn't missed him too. and you knew that the feeling of security and familiarity you experienced earlier wasn't just nostalgia or your own unresolved feelings. if that were the case, you wouldn't be feeling this comfortable on the couch with him. you wouldn't be able to pretend things were normal between you as easily as you had been all night.
kuroo still very much felt like home, and you didn't want to let him go ever again. there was only one way for you to take his declaration.
"can I..." you looked into his eyes and tried not to drown in them. "can I kiss you?"
he looked relieved at your words and eagerly nodded. "please."
you leaned forward and feverishly crashed your lips against his as soon as the word left his mouth. he raised one hand to cup your cheek and pulled you closer to him by your thigh with the other, not once breaking away from you.
soon you were straddling his lap and wrapping your arms around his neck, quiet noises releasing into the air around you both. you moved a hand up the back of his neck, into his hair, and he groaned slightly into your mouth.
you giggled into the kiss, happy to see you still knew what got him going.
as if either of you could forget- it was muscle memory at that point. just like you'd never forget how to ride a bike, you'd never forget how to make the other feel good.
eventually you both had to pull away and fill your lungs again, but you were close enough that your foreheads touched and your breaths mixed.
it was quiet aside from some light panting, so you decided to break that silence with a confession of your own. "I missed you too, tetsurou. so much."
now, you weren't sure if it was what you said or how you said it, but as soon as the words left your mouth, you felt something hard pressing against the area between your legs and gasped a little.
your eyes opened and you pulled your face away just enough to look at him properly. your eyes met his and his face was tinged pink. "I- I'm sorry... we don't... if you don't want to..." he mumbled, not sure how to gage your reaction to this sudden development.
you kissed him again, softer this time to reassure him, and smiled a bit when you pulled away. "I want to, tetsu."
he let out a relieved sigh and smiled at you in turn, then glanced over at the door. "I have no idea when they'll be back... do you want to continue this in my room?" his eyes slowly and hopefully made their way back to yours.
you nodded and squealed a bit when he suddenly scooped you up in his arms, smile growing wider as he made his way to his bedroom.
and that’s how you got here- cutting to when he gently sets you down on the bed, and you scoot back a bit to lay down comfortably. quickly following, his body covers yours and he begins kissing you again.
your arms instinctively move, one wrapping around his broad shoulders, the other cupping his cheek as you move your lips against his. his own hands, now free due to the fact that he’s propped up on one of his forearms, caress your waist and the the top of your head respectively.
after a few minutes of him focusing on your lips, he starts making his way down your neck. they’re feather light kisses at first to make you giggle, but eventually he finds the sensitive spot he always loved to mark up and the sweet sounds turn into shallow, shuddery breaths.
you whine as soon as he starts sucking on it and you bring your hand up from his cheek to his hair. "mmn... tetsu..."
he pulls away just enough so that you can still feel his lips against your flesh as he trails them up your neck to hover just over your ear. "you have no idea," he breathes out, voice low and far more erotic than you think he intended, "how much I've missed this."
you shudder and turn your face away at the tingly sensation, but the hand on your waist darts up to tilt your chin back in his direction. one thing you always appreciated about kuroo was how tenderly he handled you, no matter the tone of your late night endeavors. he was always gentle with you- not in a way that made you feel fragile, but rather in a way that told you he truly cared for you, treasured you, adored you.
the idea that this is still the case turns you on even more and makes your brain go a bit fuzzy.
when your eyes met his once more, you could see that adoration pooling in them. “look at me, sweetheart.”
you nodd slightly in his firm, yet still very soft grasp and keep your eyes trained on his. you could feel yourself getting wet as they trail over your face, and you swear your entire body feels warm as he gives you a rare type of smile only reserved for times like these.
he leans in to kiss you again and his hand moves from your face to toy with the lower hem of your dress. “you look absolutely gorgeous in this, baby, but do you think can we take it off?” he’s still speaking in the low, sultry tone that always drives you wild- you’re certain that you’d do anything he asked of you with that voice.
you sit up a little and move to unzip the dress, but he takes your hands and gives you a look. “ah ah- let me, pretty girl, you don’t have to move a muscle.”
it’s almost jarring how easily you both fall back into it. as soon as your dress is off, his shirt follows and he’s back to hovering over you. it really feels as though no time has passed since your last time with him.
just more proof that this is right.
he wastes no time in ridding you of your bra and himself of his shirt before pushing you back down onto the bed.
the room is once again filled with sounds of soft moans and gasps as he kisses your chest and takes one of your nipples into his mouth. he alternates between swirling his tongue around it and sucking. kuroo didn’t let your other breast go unattended for long, though, as he begins teasing the hardened bud with his fingers.
“aah, tetsu… please…” you gasped out.
the man on top of you chuckles, and in between switching sides he looks at you from under his eyelashes. “still so sensitive, hm? it’s cute.”
you resist the urge to hide your face and instead opt for throwing your head back when he suddenly sucks on the other nipple.
heat continues to build inside of you until he eventually he trails his kisses down the valley of your breasts, across your ribcage and down to your tummy. he spends a little extra time there, and you have to gently tug on his hair and whine about him taking too long for him to break away from your skin.
“let me worship you, angel. missed your body so much.” his voice is barely audible, the words murmured as though he was in a trance. you feel your pussy clench around nothing at his confession and bite back a whimper.
his lips curl upwards while pressed against your stomach and his eyes flicker up to meet yours. “keep your eyes on me, baby. don’t ever want to be away from you again,” he commands.
he rests his chin on your pubic bone and traces the elastic band of your panties with two familiar fingers. “you wore my favourite.”
heat rushes to your face and you do turn away this time, but he makes a disapproving noise you’re all too familiar with. “sweetheart, what did I just tell you?”
you bite your lip and force your eyes back to his.
he rewards you with a tender kiss to your belly and a “there’s a good girl, knew she was in there…” before he pulls your panties off.
you grow nervous, though you know you don’t need to be with him, and close your legs. his eyes soften significantly at the action. you're not sure why exactly the nerves get to you now of all times, especially considering how much you like his stricter side, but they do and he sees it.
he drops the strict act and rubs reassuring circles to your inner thigh. you've always preferred your softer sessions, anyway. “hey, it’s alright. I’m gonna take good care of you… missed my girl so much, just want to make you feel good, okay? we’ll save that for another time. it’s just you and me now, baby.”
you nod and a wave of calm washes over you at the reassurance. you let him pry your legs apart and gasp as he dives in.
he starts with wet kisses working their way up your thighs, to your slit and then up to your clit before he takes the bud into his mouth and sucks on it. you let out a soft moan and buck your hips into his face.
"mmn," he pulls away for a second and holds your hips down. "don't thrash, princess, just let me do all the work."
and he does. once he really gets into the groove of eating you out, you're a mess on his bed- legs shaking over his shoulders, cunt clenching around his tongue and whimpering out little thank you's when he makes you cum for the first time that night.
but he doesn't stop there. "tastes so good, baby, need more," he says in between licking your juices from your folds. "c’mon, just one more. you can do it," he picks up the pace again, and before you know it you're begging for more, too.
"tetsu- ah~!" you moan when he exchanges licking for sucking on your still sensitive clit again. you feel like you're on fire as he draws you closer and closer to reaching your second high.
you tangle your hands in his hair and he groans, sending vibrations throughout your core. you cry out and arch off the bed, spilling into his mouth.
this time when he pulls away, he slithers back up your body and kisses you. "see how good you taste, baby? best in the world, haven't I always told you that?"
your stomach twists from the praise and you turn your head to the side bashfully, trying to stabilize your breathing. he holds himself up above you and strokes your cheek with his knuckles, watching you fondly. it does nothing but make you more dizzy with affection.
when you've calmed down enough, he whispers "do you still want to-"
"yes." you cut him off and he chuckles.
"okay baby," he crawls off of you and reaches for his nightstand. he opens the drawer and-
your stomach sinks when you see an open box of condoms. the thought of him being with other girls makes you feel green with envy which you suppose isn’t fair considering you’ve been broken up for months, but you’re still a little fuzzy and too high on your own emotions right now to care.
he looks between you and the box and immediately catches on when an unexpected tear falls from your eye.
“oh, baby no-“ he takes one from the box and quickly returns to your side. “I haven’t been using these,” he cups your face and strokes his thumb under your eye.
“you haven’t?” you sniffle and he shakes his head right away.
you pout. “but then-”
kuroo cuts you off with a roll of his eyes. “one of my roommates got them for me as a joke for my birthday. I only opened them because he kept asking to borrow them.”
you digest his words and slowly look up at him. he’s already looking at you and you can’t keep your eyes from watering some more. the thought of him being intimate with someone new when you’ve spent the past few months rejecting everyone your friends forced your way.
“I haven’t even looked at anyone else since we broke up,” he murmurs against your hairline. “missed you too much.”
you nod, finding no traces of dishonesty on his features. “I haven’t been with anyone either… I wasn’t over you. I didn’t want to be,” you admit, voice soft.
he smiles and presses kisses from your scalp down to your cheeks. “such a sweet girl I have, hm? how about you help me out here?”
he tugs off his sweats and your attention is drawn to the tent his boxers. you bite your lip and reach for the band but he takes your hand and places the condom on your palm.
you blink up at him, confused. “you don’t want me to-“
he shakes his head and tugs his boxers down. his cock springs free and you gasp a little at the sight of his tip- red and smeared with pre-cum.
“no, angel, I need to be inside of you. just help me put it on.”
you make quick work of tearing the wrapper off and rolling the condom over his length. he groans at the feeling of your knuckles grazing his skin, but as soon as you pull away he’s flipping you on your back and lining himself up against your entrance.
he knocks his forehead against yours. “ready, baby?”
you nod and wrap your arms around his neck to pull him closer. he leans down for a kiss and slowly pushes into you as your lips connect.
you whine a little at the stretch and he pauses everything. “you’re okay,” he reassures you, giving you time to adjust.
you nod when you feel ready for him to keep going and he bottoms out with a strangled moan. “you’re unreal, you know that?”
his praise pulls a giggle from your throat but it quickly turns into a breathy sigh when he starts moving.
he starts off slow, but soon enough you’re both lost in the moment and his pace picks up. within the next few minutes, his room is filled with sounds of pleasure and sweet words exchanged between lovers.
“you’re perfect,” he says, angling his lips closer to your ear. his hips stutter when you clamp around him at his words.
his thrusts reach deep enough to get you crying out for him. “tetsu, faster! please!”
“ah- there’s a good girl, love hearing you beg for more.” he nibbles the spot just below your ear, soothing it with his tongue.
“I love you,” you whimper, nails digging into his shoulders.
kuroo groans at the sensation and goes a bit harder. “you needed this just as bad as I did, hm? it’s okay, I’ve got you now, pretty girl. just relax.”
you hide your face in his neck and try to stifle your moans, but he doesn’t appreciate that one bit. “stop that, let me hear you,” he commands and you immediately pull your head back.
he grins down at you and kisses your nose. “sound so pretty when you’re falling apart on my cock, you know better than to hide those noises from me.”
you nod and find yourself unable to look away from his face, as if you were in a trance. he’s absolutely gorgeous on top of you- why would you want to look away?
“you close, baby?” he asks after your walls tighten even more.
“mmhm,” you whimper and lean up for a kiss.
“me too,” he whispers and tugs one of your hands away from his shoulder. he intertwines your fingers and presses is above your head against the pillow. “needed this just as badly as I did, hm? it’s okay, I’ve got you, baby.”
doing so good for me.
you’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.
you feel so fucking good, princess.
all of his praise sent shockwaves throughout your body and soon enough you’re tipping over the edge. your back is arched, head thrown back and a loud cry of his name is drawn from you as you cum for the second time.
he follows soon after and you feel his whole body shudder when he spills into his condom.
your breaths mix together as you both come down from your highs. it’s quiet for a few moments before he carefully pulls out and disposes of the soiled contraceptive in the trash next to his bed. he rolls back into bed, facing you.
he strokes your cheek with his knuckles and smiles at you when you open your eyes and turn to face him as well. “hi pretty girl, you okay?”
you take a deep breath and curl into his chest. you still feel slightly too light and any thoughts not related to him are muddled. you’re overcome with an intense wave of affection for him.
he must notice, because when you manage to peek up at him again, he snorts. “yeah, I don’t know what I was expecting.”
he knows better than to try and leave the bed right away (memories of you whining and clinging to him when he did attempt it early on in your relationship flash through his mind and he smiles), so instead he wraps his arms around you and presses kisses to your hairline.
you savour the familiar feeling of being wrapped in his arms and nuzzle into his bare chest. the most comfortable feeling in the world.
eventually he does get up to grab a damp cloth and some water, and he informs you that you can use his bathroom for whatever you need.
you’re both following the same routine you had when you were together as if you hadn’t broken up at all.
now that you’ve regained some clarity, you start to worry about what exactly that means.
you’ve both admitted to missing each other like crazy, but you assume you’ll need to have a serious conversation with kuroo about whether or not you should get back together.
you ponder over this on his bed for a bit longer before he interrupts your thoughts. “we don’t have to talk about it right now,” he starts. “we can talk about it tomorrow morning if you would prefer, but…”
he pauses like he’s not sure if he should continue. you nod encouragingly, curious as to where this is going (thought you think you know). “but I meant absolutely everything I said tonight. um, before and while we were… uh. busy.”
you giggle a little at his shy demeanour before considering the weight of his words. “we could talk about it tomorrow morning, but I think we both already know what we want from this right?”
he doesn’t need to nod, but he does anyway. “I definitely have an answer already.”
you knock your forehead against his. “so… are we officially back together then?”
he offers you the widest grin he’s thrown your way all night. “I think we are, sweetheart. We’ll make it work this time, I promise.”
“I promise,” you repeat.
the rest of the night is spent cuddling under covers, sharing kisses and secrets you’ve missed out on sharing these past few months.
“I love you,” you say, before you finally drift off for the night.
you don’t hear him, but he’s quick to return the sentiment. “I love you too.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
BONUS:
the following morning, you wake up to your phone ringing. you groan when you see it’s your friend and realize you never texted her back last night to tell her you’re okay.
you look over at kuroo, still sound asleep beside you, and answer as quietly as possible. “hello?”
“oh thank goodness you’re alright, why weren’t you picking up? we all called you a million times!”
you check and see a ton of missed calls from more of your friends who saw you leave the party last night. “I’m sorry, I was asleep,” you say sincerely, only twisting the truth a little bit.
you feel slightly bad about it, you mentally promise her to tell her everything later.
before she can respond, your boyfriend sits up (when did he even wake up?) and says into the phone, “sorry, it’s my fault. but I promise I took good care of her,” he smirks at you.
you flinch when she shrieks into your ear. “YOU WERE WITH KUROO?!”
glaring at him, he snickers and takes the phone from you. “she’ll call you back later, we’re still catching up.”
“no, wait-“ he hangs up the phone and tosses it onto his sheets.
you pout at him. “tetsu, c’mon.”
he kisses your cheek. “I really didn’t meant for it to come off as rude, I swear. I just wanted a relaxing morning with you before you have to leave.”
you sigh and fall back into the soft comfort of his pillows. “it’s okay,” you say. “I really didn’t feel like giving her the rundown first thing in the morning, anyway. you really tired me out last night,” you peer up at him.
he laughs. “oh really? we’ve gotta build up your stamina again, pretty girl. I wasn’t lying-“ he crawls over and hovers a few inches above you. “we still have a lot of catching up to do.”
you mentally pat yourself on the back for answering his texts. definitely not your worst idea.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I swear I’ll get better at writing smut, folks 🫡
but for my first time writing it, I don’t think it’s horrible. if the ending feels a bit rushed, it’s because I’ve literally had this sitting in my drafts since miss olivia rodrigo released the music video for this song last august and I wanted it out 🙃.
tagging @nyctophilicroses bc I remember you commented on the original post I made asking abt exes to lovers with kuroo 🥹
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arachnerd-8-legs · 6 months ago
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really disappointing that bunjywunjy had to be pestered twice just to quietly remove their reblog after using their huge platform to encourage garbage like raving about the lesbian estonian soviet flag and how 'new pride flag just dropped' so people could go 'ooh pretty' about a flag that was forced onto us by ppl who wanted our culture gone and oppressed us for about a century in total if not more.
to say nothing or not show anything of the truth about that flag and quietly remove the reblog felt more like it was done out of obligation (and you didn't agree) rather than care for the subject matter that is still a fresh wound in our country's memory. it's only been 33 years since it ended.
I'd rather you make the mistake about something you didn't know (eastern european history is easy for westeners to overlook, because we're not a big country like them, we're not england or france or spain or germany) and admit/apologize for said mistake or even just outright state that you don't actually care rather than say nothing and quietly remove something so that people would stop talking about it
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cutecatlov3r · 2 years ago
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𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦!
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bnha x reader ! (fem)
synopsis: halloween is so boring, right? that's what you thought until you met some new masked faces.
word count: 14.2k
warnings/tw: all characters are 18+, no quirks, college AU, alcohol, drugs, getting drugged(?), teasing, gang bang(?), recording, noncon(?), hair pulling, choking, degrading, praising, sub!reader, corruption, dry humping, nipple play, begging, oral (m! f!), fingering, spanking, cheating(Midoriya?), facials, manipulating (Midoriya?), piv, creampie, unprotected sex, grinding, clit grinding(?), and roleplay(?)
a/n: wrote this on wattpad but I'm posting it on here. not proofread, please comment if I messed anything up !... oh and please like, comment, and re-blog, ily ! please don't copy my work :x
song: Or Nah [Ty Dolla $ign, The Weekend, Wiz Khalifa, and Mustard]
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"Come on Y/n! It'll be fun, you never go out anyway!"
My pink haired friend- well roommate, was currently convincing me to go to a special Halloween party... But it just sounds too cliche. I'm not really a party girl, I'd rather stay home and enjoy some horror movies.
Maybe I'll roll up a blunt later and let my mind take over as I watch people get murdered in the most gruesome ways...! In movies, of course.
"I promised some of my friends you'll be there!" Mina whined. She puffed out her cheeks, huffing.
I shook my head 'No'. 
Mina's friends were well... They were men. When I see them around her on campus I could tell that they are kind of intimidating. Especially the guy with red hair. He was ripped with abs and muscles, his little scar at the top of his eyebrow made him look scary. In a delinquent way.
But I've never spoken to her friends yet so I can't really judge so quickly.
It's the start of my first year in college, it's only been three months since I've got here and I haven't really made any friends. Mina is basically my only friend. It's not my fault! I've just been too busy to go out and greet new people. School work is a pain in the ass!
Mina walked over to her room, abruptly, I cocked my eyebrow at her, wondering what she was going to do. She came running out of her room, throwing a bag at me. "I already bought you a costume too! Please N/n!" she begged. She got on her knees, putting her hands together. She gave me some puppy dog eyes.
I rolled my eyes, looking into the bag... 
A bunny costume?
"Uh I don't know about this Mina," I said, furrowing my eyebrows. It's going to show a lot of skin. 
"Please Y/n! It's going to be fun! All of my friends are matching costumes together, it's gonna look so cool and you'll be like the only person who won't be able to see it!" 
I sighed, looking at the costume. It looks very provocative... I know I'm 18 and I'm officially an adult but jeez. I didn't think I'd ever see myself in such a revealing way. I'm usually in sweatpants and sweatshirts.
"I'll think about it," I said, shrugging. I put the bag on the coffee table nearby. I laid back on the couch, grabbing my phone to play some games.
The party was tonight, it was going to be hosted at someone's house. I think the guy's name was Shoto? I can't really remember what Mina was saying, she rambles a lot.
"Thank you my baby Y/n~ I'll tell everyone you're going!" Mina cheered, pumping her fist in the air. She grabbed out her phone quickly, typing fast.
"Wait I didn't say ye-"
"Already done! Everyone is expecting you now, so go and start getting ready!" 
It's only 6 pm... Do I seriously have to get ready? I wanna stay home now. I wanted to at least take a quick nap...
"The party starts at 9, but we are going around 8 to help set up. Shoto is my friend so I don't want him to set up alone," Mina said, stretching.
"Fine..." I sulked.
-
Shit...
I looked at myself in the mirror. My tits were basically spilling out of my costume! My thigh highs kept slipping off as well. I turned around and saw the fluffy cotton tail, but my butt was pretty much fully exposed. I had my hair down, sighing, I put on the bunny ears.
This is nothing like me but goddamn I do look pretty sexy. I just did my makeup normally, I went with my go-to makeup look, I wasn't trying to go all out tonight. I honestly am not expecting anything crazy to happen.
All I really want to do is say 'hi' and maybe take a shot or two, then I'll come home and watch some horror films.
Knock!
Knock!
"Y/n!" Mina called out, knocking on my door.
"Just open it," I yelled. I didn't lock my door so she just came in.
Mina walked in, looking at her phone. She must've just got done calling someone. She was wearing an all black bodysuit. She had black lipstick that was very vivid, it  went along well with her dark brown skin. It fit her perfectly. I looked at her belt, it had a ghost-face mask attached to it. Ah! She must be trying to be ghost-face for this Halloween! "It's time to-"
She just stared at me in disbelief. Does she think I look bad?!
"...Uh... How do I look?" I asked, trying to break the silence.
"You look... Sexy!!!" Mina shouted, excitedly. She walked around me in circles. She was making sure to see everything. "It fits you perfectly! I didn't know you had such a sexy body!!" she continued.
The praise from her made my cheeks heat up. I rarely ever had compliments told to my face. It made me feel special. Mina always hypes me up when I show the tiniest bit of skin but this is the most she's seen. So I'm guessing she is very proud of me.
"You look very nice too! Are you ghost-face?" I asked, looking at her cute costume some more.
She shook her head 'yes', holding a thumbs up. "My friends and I are planning on matching!"
That's a cute idea. It will be cool seeing a bunch of ghost-faces at a party! Maybe this party won't be so bad... Mina put me in a confident mood, so I hate to say it but I'm kind of excited. As much as I don't want to go, I guess it wouldn't hurt to have some sort of fun.
"Let's get going," Mina said, shaking her car keys in my face. I smiled, nodding.
We walked out of our apartment, heading to Mina's hot pink car. One thing everyone should know about Mina is that her favorite color is pink, well, she only likes the color pink. She made an exception for her friends today when she put on her black bodysuit.
Mina jumped in the car, starting the engine, I sat in the passenger seat. I put on my seat belt, sitting back, comfortably. Her seats were a fuzzy pink fur type. It was always so soft. 
After checking her black lipstick she started driving.
"This is like a 15 minute drive. Shoto lives out on the country side," Mina said, focusing her eyes on the road.
"That sounds cool," I replied, looking at my phone. I scrolled through my twitter feed, nothing really interesting was happening now.
"So are you planning on getting laid?" Mina teased, giggling. 
That question was out of nowhere! I dropped my phone, flustered. "No! Of course not..." I mumbled.
"Oh c'mon Y/n! When was the last time you got laid?" Mina asked. She tapped her fingers against her steering wheel, showing me her teasing gaze.
I went into a deep thought. I'm not a virgin or anything but I just don't have time to sleep with anyone right now, school work is my priority.
"Hm... I think like 8 months ago?" I replied. It was an old friend from high school, we both had sex only because we we're just reminiscing on old memories. We don't talk anymore, I guess. I don't care though. In my experience... Sex wasn't really that exciting to me.
"8 MONTHS?!" Mina shrieked, pretending to swerve the car.
"I don't care for sexual things," I shrugged, embarrassed. I never spoke with anyone about my sexual life so it all was embarrassing.
Mina shook her head, wagging her finger at me as she kept her eyes on the road. 
"We are getting you laid tonight," she stated.
I yawned. "I doubt I'll get laid. But if I do then it'll be a miracle," 
"I'll pray for you," Mina giggled. She turned on the radio, blasting it all the way up. The bass was making my heart shake, I didn't mind it though. Nicki Minaj is always her go-to rapper. So I just closed my eyes as Nicki Minaj's music played.
After a few minutes of Mina singing her heart out, she turned down the music. I opened my eyes, wondering if we'd made it to the party. I looked at the house in front of us and... It was huge! It was like a palace!
This can't be the place... right?!
"We're here," Mina said, parking her car at the front of the house. There was a circle-like entrance, a white fountain was in the middle. It looked amazing. I stepped out of the car to admire the outside of the house. It looked like a dream house that everyone would want, it probably cost millions. Mina got out of the car, standing next to me. "It's pretty, isn't it? When I first came here I had the same reaction,"
"Why are you two just standing there?" a voice asked.
I turned my attention to the huge door of the house. A boy with red and white hair stood there. He had a scar on his eye that was on the left side of his face. I'm not judging or anything, it actually looked pretty cool. He had on a ghost-face costume, letting a black hooded robe go down to his ankles. I wonder where his mask was.
"Shoto!" Mina yelled, walking quickly up the stairs of his entrance. I followed behind her, not knowing where I should go.
"Mina," Shoto greeting, nodding his head. His eyes were multicolored, one was blue and one was grey. His eyes trailed on my figure, starting from the bottom to the top. "You're in my English class. Your name is Y/n, right?"
He's in my class?! Gosh... I'm so rude for not even noticing!
"Yes," I nod. "I'm assuming you're Shoto?" 
He nodded at me, giving me a light smile. He stepped aside from his door, waving his hand as a gesture for Mina and I to come in. 
Amazed is an understatement. As soon as I stepped inside I was greeted with flashing lights, there were Halloween decorations everywhere. It looked so cool! Compared to the outside, the inside looks enticing. There was a double stairway that led to the second floor... All of it was simply breath taking!
"What could we help you with?" Mina asked, putting her hands on her hips.
"I think I did everything already. I told you, you didn't need to come and help. Midoriya and Ochako are actually in the kitchen, they are putting the drinks in some ice. I guess if you want, you can ask them if they need help with anything,"  Shoto explained.
Mina nodded, walking to the kitchen.
I stayed with Shoto. I don't even know why I didn't follow Mina. Shoto looked at me, I stared at him. It was silent, I don't really know what to say. I barely know this guy so it's bound to be weird if it's just us two.
Shoto coughed in an attempt to break this awkward silence. "Do you want to go to the lounge to have a seat?" he asked, kindly.
I'm kind of unsure on what to reply with but for now I guess I could try to befriend Shoto. I followed him to his lounge area and oh my... It was huge! There were two ping pong tables, two pool tables, drinks and snacks everywhere, gaming beanie bags, and a very big flat screen T.V. I can also see how the outside looks from the huge bay window, from what I can see there was definitely a pool out there. Is this heaven...?!
He sat on the couch near the gaming chairs, he patted down the seat beside him. I'm pretty sure it was a signal for me to sit with him, to which I accepted, taking a seat beside him.
"I like your costume. I never pictured you as someone who'd wear that though," Shoto commented.
I dead panned. Is that a compliment or an insult...? Jeez... Am I really that boring or something? C'mon! This outfit can't be that different from what I usually wear... Well... It is but still! I can have fun sometimes!
"Thanks..." I sulked, looking at the ground.
"Do you want something to drink?" Shoto asked, using his thumb to point behind him at the drinks.
I took a second to think but I just ended up nodding. One drink can't hurt.
Shoto gave me a slight smile, walking over to the red cooler. I looked around some more as he was rummaging through the cooler. I admired the detail and decorations put up to make this party seem fun.
"Shoto, where's the whiskey?" a deep voice asked, it seemed uninterested and bored.
Goddamn... That voice sounded so sexy, by habit I turned around to face the voice. It was a taller man with black shaggy hair. He was in sweatpants and a black shirt. The shirt hugged his muscles tightly. He had piercings and tattoos covering his body. I looked down at his hands to see black nail polish paint on his fingernails. He looked so hot.
His deep blue eyes pierced through mine, he licked his lips seductively.
"Aw Shoto, who's this little bunny?" he asked, taking a seat next to me. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder, admiring my outfit up close. He had no shame as he stared directly at my tits! It's... It's kind of hot though.
"Go away Toya," Shoto groaned, sitting on the other side of me, he gave me a beer. I opened it, taking a sip.
I can see Shoto glaring at Toya, all Toya did was give him a smirk.
"I'm Toya, friends call me Dabi but you can call me whatever you want, pretty girl," Toya said, grabbing my chin to make sure I keep eye contact with him. He's so ugh... Sexy... My heart was beating at a rapid pace, he took my breath away. I could feel my face warm up from the nickname.
"I'm Y/n," I greeted, averting my eyes from his. I'm not trying to be rude but the eye contact was too intense. If I kept looking into his eyes I would've got lost in them.
He chuckled, letting go of my face. Shoto rolled his eyes at Toya.
"I thought you said that you don't do lame parties like this," Shoto said, furrowing his eyebrows.
"I don't, just came here to get some whiskey and go back up to my room," Toya shrugged.
His room? Wait are they both brothers? I mean I can see some similarities. Their eyes are both gorgeous, their facial structure is sharp and handsome. I guess I could see them being brothers. Even if they are, I wonder why Shoto doesn't seem very fond of him.
"Well then get the liquor and leave then?" Shoto scoffed, irritated.
Toya let out a little laugh. He got up off the couch and walked over to the table with all the drinks. I took another sip of my beer as I watched him grab a big bottle of 'Jack Daniel's Whiskey'. He stopped in his tracks, standing right over me. 
"If this party gets boring, don't be afraid to just go upstairs. My room is down the right hallway, it's the last door on the left. Hope I see you there soon, we can have lots of fun," Toya flirted. His hand went into his pocket, he pulled out a little baggie that contained two round and white pills. He gave me a quick wink before leaving.
Shoto shook his head. "Sorry about my older brother, he isn't always like this," 
I put my hands up, swaying them. I wasn't offended or anything. "No, no, it's okay! I'm fine!" 
Shoto let out a sigh of relief. "So, are you excited for this party?" he asked, taking a sip of his own beer.
"I don't really know anyone around campus. I only came because Mina begged me to. I don't really have high hopes but from the decorations and everything, it seems like it's going to be fun," I replied, relaxing my body on the couch.
"It's Halloween, I'm sure it'll be fun," Shoto said, relaxing down on the couch with me. 
I shrugged, sipping on the beer can, it was bitter. I never really was fond of beer, I was more of a vodka girl.
"We should hangout sometime, I always see you around campus but I never talked to you. You seem cool," Shoto said, nonchalantly. His monotonous voice was very sensual, I liked it a lot.
I nodded my head. "Sure, we should exchange numbers," 
Shoto agreed. We both gave each other phones to each other. I added my contact info in his and he added his into mine. I wouldn't mind having lunch with Shoto, he seems nice so far. We also have English together, supposedly, so we could help each other out here and there.
Ding!
Shoto looked at his phone. "Fuck..." he mumbled, shaking his head.
"Is everything okay?" I asked, cocking my eyebrow.
"Everyone is planning on coming early, they are going to be here in like five minutes," 
I started to get filled with anxiety. Who exactly is everyone? Did he mean the whole university or...? Gosh, I'm just nervous!
"When everyone gets here our group is planning on meeting up in my room. You should come too, I'm sure they won't mind," Shoto said, pushing his hair back, it kept falling down a little.
"Oh, what are you guys going to be doing?" I asked. I didn't want to intrude if they were taking photos or anything together, it's their group and I don't want to be rude. I know many people don't like it when a new person joins their group randomly.
"We're just going to smoke some weed and then come downstairs to the party," Shoto replied. 
I gave him an unsure look. I don't want to be cross-faded at this party without having any friends to help me if I black out.
Shoto gave me a concerned look. "Shit I'm sorry, I didn't know if you smoked or not. I get it if you're not cool with things like that, I apologize,"
Shit! I didn't want to seem mad by smoking weed, I do it here and there too!
"No! It's not that... I just don't want to be cross-faded at this party. I don't want anything bad to happen, you know?" I said, looking down at the floor, embarrassed.
Shoto lightly chuckled. "Don't worry, nothing bad will happen, I swear. We all will be in my room around 9pm sharp. Be there, I insist. I'm personally inviting you," he said, softly.
I gave him a nod, smiling back.
"Fine, I'll go,"
"Did you want me to walk you there? I know that you haven't been here before. You may get lost," Shoto said, standing up, slowly.
"Oh you wanted to go right now? It's only 8:30?" I said, standing up as well. I finished the last of my beer, holding an empty can. I looked around for a trash can. I spotted it, I better remind myself to throw this away in a little bit.
"We can just hangout there for a little bit, my friends will meet us up there whenever. We all just agreed to be there by 9," Shoto explained, holding out his hand for me to take.
I decided to hold his hand as he led me to his room. We walked up the flight of stairs. The hallway was huge! Halloween decorations were everywhere! It was so cool. We walked down a dark hallway, he opened a door, which I assumed was his room. I stepped inside of the room, it was nice and clean. It was in a Japanese-like structure. It was like a living room though, not even, more like an apartment. His room was huge. 
I took a seat on the couch that was in there, Shoto sat next to me, texting on his phone.
"Midoriya will be here any second now so it isn't awkward," Shoto said.
"What do you mean?" I asked, confused.
"I don't want you to feel uncomfortable with only me being in here, I don't want it to seem like I just want it to be us two. I thought I should invite Midoriya in here as well so you guys could also be introduced," Shoto responded.
Aw. That's sweet that he thought about my feelings, I appreciated that respectfulness in a man.
"That's sweet of you to think about how I feel. And trust me, I'm not uncomfortable around you, but thank you for considering my feelings," I thanked, giving him a big smile.
He looked down, his hair was above his eyes so I couldn't see them but his face was tinted pink. Cute.
Knock!
Knock!
"Come in!" Shoto called out.
"Hey Sho-" a boy started, stopping his sentence as he saw me. The boy had freckles, his green eyes matched with his fluffy green hair. He was wearing a black robe, holding his ghost-face mask in his left hand. 
"Midoriya, this is Y/n," Shoto said, placing his hand on my shoulder. I gave Izuku a small smile and a little wave. I've definitely seen him on campus. He's always around a girl with brown hair and a guy with glasses.
Izuku's face was bright red as he walked over to us. He avoided looking at my outfit, I wonder why. Does he think it looked bad?
"N-nice to meet you y/n," Midoriya stuttered. "I'm Izuku," he introduced, extending his hand towards mine.
"Nice to meet you too, Izuku," I smiled, shaking his hand.
"You're Mina's roommate right? She talks about you all the time," Izuku commented, taking a seat next to me. He looked nervous and sweaty. He was a very cute guy, he seemed very shy though from what I could tell.
I laughed slightly, nodding. "I am her roommate," I confirmed. I had no idea Mina talked about me around her friends, it made me feel special. Mina always has a way at making people feel special, I love her.
"Kacchan and the others just called before I came in here, saying they were outside so they should be here any-"
Knock!
Knock!
"Speak of the devil," Izuku smiled, looking towards the door.
"Come in!" Shoto called out, his attention going to the door as well.
The door swung open, it made a loud sound. I made a little squeak, I wasn't ready to hear that loud noise. A bunch of people with ghost-face masks barged in. They all were wearing their masks, I couldn't even tell who was who.
"Got here early dipshit!"
"There's already some people down stairs, let's fucking party already! I brought the weed!"
"Hurry the hell up... I'm going over to Dabi's room for some molly after this..."
"Who's that?"
"Woah! Shoto! You bought us a stripper?!" a guy asked, rushing over to me. He took off his mask, revealing a blonde haired boy. He had a black strip of lightning in his hair. His golden eyes made direct eye contact with my eyes. "You're really sexy you know!" 
I blushed at his comment. Who is this guy?
"Denki! Leave her alone!" Mina called out, pushing past the other masked people. She ran over to Denki, slapping the back of his head. He winced in pain, rubbing the spot where she had hit.
"Who's that, Mina?" a voice asked. The voice took off his mask... It was that one scary guy with the red hair! He had his hair down today though, it was usually all gelled up! He looked not so scary with his hair down.
"Everyone! Take off your masks! I want to introduce you to the infamous Y/n L/n!" Mina cheered, going behind me to do some jazz hands.
I looked as each of the people took off their masks. They all stared at me. There was a high tension in the room as I looked at the other males in the room. Their eyes were glued to me... I didn't know how to feel. I felt like a lost bunny with a pack of hungry wolves... It didn't help that every single man in the room right now... is either sexy or hot! They made my legs feel weak.
One of the men was an ashy blonde, his eyebrows were furrowed. He glared at me with his red eyes. He looked annoyed. Jeez... Maybe this was a bad idea coming here into Shoto's room... I knew they wouldn't like me.
"Hi! I'm Eijiro Kirishima! It's very nice to finally meet you!" the red head said, giving me a bright smile.
This is surprising... He's so sweet! He wasn't anything like I expected, he seemed to give off a positive energy. I feel kind of bad I judged him based on his looks, he is like a happy little puppy.
I gave him a smile back. "Yeah, it's nice to meet you too,"
"So pretty lady, you're smoking with us or what?" 
I looked over at the voice, he gave me a smug smirk. He had black hair, it was a mullet-like type of hair cut. It looked really good on him. He held up a plastic bag full of weed, showing it off for me to see. His almond shaped eyes weren't even looking at my face, they were obviously looking at either my thighs or my waist.
"Don't pressure her," another voice added. 
I looked over at him. He was pushing his messy purple hair back. He had visible eye bags. His lavender eyes stayed staring at the floor, he seemed tired. He gave me an off-vibe. I liked the mysterious vibe though.
Mina shook her head. "This here is Bakugou, Sero, Shinso, and Denki," she stated, pointing to each of the boys. Bakugou was the ashy blonde who was glaring at me. Sero is that one guy with the smug smirk. And lastly, Shinso was the boy with the very unique purple eyes.
"I am here to smoke too..." I muttered, looking down at my hands. I feel embarrassed to really be here. I was the only person who wasn't dressed as ghost-face in this room. 
Denki looked at me, confused. "You smoke?" he asked.
I nodded.
"Damn, what other secrets aren't you telling us about bunny-girl?" he giggled.
I felt my heart race rapidly at his little nickname. A hot guy calling me 'bunny-girl' doesn't happen so often. Denki was very attractive, just from looking at his ear piercings and his little ring lip piercing, it was obvious he was hot! He did look very confident talking to me so I'm pretty sure he's some kind of flirt.
"It's Y/n," Mina corrected, irritated by her friends. 
Shinso laid down on Shoto's bed. Denki and Sero sat down on two bean bags. Bakugou and Mina joined Izuku, Shoto, and I on the couch. Kirishima sat on the floor, happily. I took a deep breath, trying to relieve my anxiety. I felt so anxious being here.
"Aw, is someone nervous?" Sero teased.
"No! I just am a bit anxious... I don't know you all that well," I admit.
"Aw, that's cute. Don't worry, we don't bite," Kirishima laughed.
His laughter made me feel a bit better. I took a deep breath, relieving my nerves. This won't be bad, it will be just fine. I just needed to stay calm, all we're doing is smoking.
"Let's get started then, shall we?" Sero asked, his voice sounding as if he was teasing me.
Mina grabbed my arm, suddenly, taking a picture of the two of us. She kissed my cheek, and grabbed my boob in the photo. I didn't care though, I know that she's a touchy person. Sometimes I can be touchy with her too. I was used to this.
"Cute! This is going on my Instagram later," she squealed. I smiled at her childishness.
"My turn?" Denki flirted, winking. He attempted to grab my hand but Mina smacked it away, wagging her finger at him. He gave a small laugh, rubbing the back of his neck.
I giggled at his poor attempt to touch me. He is such a dork.
"Hey, that's not a bad idea. Let's all take a photo with the bunny-girl, it'll look so cool," Sero said, grinding up the weed in his grinder. What did he mean by cool? It would make me look like an odd one out, in my opinion.
"I wouldn't mind that," I agreed, looking around at everyone.
"It's only if you want to Y/n," Izuku said, reassuringly. He stopped his shy act, maybe he was more comfortable because he's around me, though his cheeks were still a bit pink.
Shoto took out his phone, tapping my shoulder. "Selfie?" he asked.
I nodded, smiling. I wrapped my arm around his shoulder as he took the picture. I am a pretty touchy person myself, only when I feel comfortable. I think the beer from earlier made me feel more confident as I spent more time with everyone.
"Hey, c'mon let's take a group photo. Stop trying to keep her to yourself, Shoto," Denki scoffed. It was a playful scoff, nothing signifying he was irritated.
"I-I'm not," he said, softly.
"Now! Mina! Can you please take the picture!?" Sero asked, giving his phone to her. Mina rolled her eyes, shaking her head yes.
"Can you stand up for a second bunny-girl?" Denki asked, sweetly. He gave me a cheeky smile. I agreed to stand up only because he asked so sweetly.
Denki sat in the middle, Izuku and Kirishima sat next to him. Shoto sat on the floor with Sero, under Denki. Bakugou and Shinso stood behind the couch. They all put on their ghost-face masks. It looked so damn cool!
But where am I supposed to sit on the couch? I looked down, not knowing what to do.
"Come here," Denki smiled, patting his lap. I looked at him confused… Is he asking me to sit on his lap? Should I? I barely know these guys but they all seem nice… Well almost all of them. I guess I could, I should let loose a bit, I shouldn't be known as a 'good girl'. I want to have fun!
I took a deep breath, walking over to Denki and the group. Shoto and Sero moved over a little so I could get by. I sat on Denki's lap, spreading my legs a little so I don't have them on Shoto or Sero. I don't want to make them feel uncomfortable.
Denki giggled, placing his hands on my waist, rubbing up and down slowly. He put his face by my ear, smelling my hair. "You smell good, babe," he whispered. My breath hitched a little, I could feel my core heat up. His voice was something that I really liked about him.
"Say cheese!" Mina yelled, giggling.
No one said anything, she snapped about three photos.
"More poses!" she demanded.
What other poses should we do?
"I have an idea, if it's okay with you babe?" Denki said, innocently.
I shrugged. "Alright, do whatever you want Denki,"
Denki did a little cheer underneath his breath. He grabbed Shoto's hand and placed it on my thigh, grabbing Sero's hand and doing the same thing. My mind was racing, my heart was beating fast. I didn't think he was going to do this! Denki put Izuku and Kirishima's hands on my boobs. I felt so hot and heated, I squeezed my legs together, slightly, not knowing what to say, lastly he put his hands on my waist.
Mina cocked her eyebrow, snapping some pictures. I could feel someone's hand go through my hair, roughly pulling on it. I let out a squeak, it hurt but I kind of liked it.
Mina snapped more photos. And within seconds a hand was around my neck, squeezing it, tightly. I blushed instantly, I don't know why I feel this way. I want to rub my thighs together so bad but Shoto and Sero's hands would be touching where I needed friction and I don't want that right now! It would be too embarrassing!
"All done!" Mina said, skipping over to us, handing Sero back his phone.
Everyone stopped touching me, I felt so dizzy. I shook my head, taking some deep breaths. That was intense… These guys are all so hot… I can't help feeling like this!
Sero grabbed his phone, showing everyone the photos. I was a blushing mess in almost all of them. I feel so embarrassed seeing myself in such a provocative way.
"You look good Y/n," Kirishima complimented, holding a thumbs up. He took off his mask, showing how red his face was.
"She deserves an award for this, right?" Sero teased, taking his mask off as well. Was he asking everyone or…? Sero was kind of confusing.
"She looks like a slut," a gruff voice commented. I turned around to face Bakugou, he scoffed at me, rolling his eyes.
W-well if I was a slut then I'd be happy to be one for these nice guys! I furrowed my eyebrows, rolling my eyes at him.
I could hear him curse underneath him breath, it made me smirk.
"Let's get back to business," Shinso said, sitting down by the grinder. He started grinding it up himself. Sero sighed, going over to Shinso to help. The two of them took off their masks.
Ding!
Mina looked at her phone. She started squealing.
"I gotta go, I'll smoke what's left! Ochako and Tsuyu are doing body shots!" she shouted, running out of the room.
Wait! Shit! I'm going to be the only one here then!
Bakugou walked over to the door, locking it. He took off his mask, giving me an angry look, sitting on one of the bean bags in Shoto's room.
Now I began to get more nervous. I was the only girl here now, everyone's eyes were on me. My heart was racing, seeing all of these eyes on me.
Denki grabbed my hips by surprise. I let out a tiny whimper because I wasn't expecting this. He let out a laugh, taking off his mask
"You're so cute," he complimented, pushing my body back to lay against his chest. I felt so tense. I took a deep breath, relaxing myself into Denki's arms.
I could feel something hard poking me. I began to get flustered by all of the thoughts running through my mind, was he hard right now?! Goddammit, this is making me feel more tense… I am flattered though.
"H-he's not wrong, you are pretty cute," Izuku added, taking off his mask, and looking away. His green hair covered his emerald colored eyes that I liked to look at.
"Tch. Stop acting so innocent Deku. We all know that's a fucking lie," Bakugou scoffed.
Izuku shook his head, slowly. He gave Bakugou a stern look, I did not expect this from him…
"Don't listen to him… He's just in a mood today," Shoto said, standing over me. He defended Izuku.
I nodded, understanding that what Bakugou said wasn't true… well maybe it wasn't, Izuku looked very serious. His seriousness made me feel nervous, in a good way.
"All done!" Sero cheered, lighting up his joint. He took a deep drag out of it.
"Share some!" Kirishima whined, walking over to Sero to get a hit out of the blunt.
I waited patiently for my turn. As the blunt went around, I watched each one of the boys start to get their high on. Denki took a deep drag, blowing the smoke in my face. I coughed, using my hand to fan away the smoke. Denki put the joint in his mouth, using his arms to flip me over to face him, I was straddling his waist now. I wanted to grind against him by instinct but I didn't, I waited for him to tell me what to do.
He inhaled the smoke, grabbing my hair, harshly. He connected our lips, I was so shocked. My eyes widened at the realization that he kissed me. I inhaled the smoke through his mouth, letting out a tiny cough.
Izuku was in a trance, seeing us two, up close. I got up off Denki's lap, I could feel my legs start to shake. I felt so weak. Looking around, I can see that each boy had their jaw agape. I sat next to Denki, sitting silently as he gave me the blunt.
What the hell was that… I… I… I've never felt so alive! I want to feel my heart race like that again… I want to take him right here and right now… That was so fucking sexy! I took a deep breath, taking a hit of the joint and passing it.
"Wait Denki! Did you fuck up the cycle?! It's puff puff pass! You fucker, your ass can get killed if it wasn't just us here, dumbass," Sero scolded. Denki just shrugged, not caring. He placed both of his hands behind his head, smirking.
I eased into the couch as I let my high take over.
"Let's hurry this shit up, they're doing jello shots downstairs," Bakugou stated, taking one last hit.
We went around in a circle two more times until Sero put out the joint in an ash tray that he brought with him.
"Save that for Mina, let's go," he said, walking over to the door.
I yawned, feeling my high. I did not want to get up. I wanted to stay there and relax.
"Go without me…" I mumbled, laying down on the couch.
"Tch, idiot,"
"We'll be back shortly, y/n!"
"Lock the door if it makes you more comfortable,"
"I'll be back in a second, we can finish what we started,"
"Bye!"
I didn't really care about what they said, I just loved this relaxing feeling. I smiled to myself, sitting up on the couch.
Wait… Maybe I should join them downstairs? I don't want to seem like a downer. Gosh now I feel bad... I shook my head, ready to stand up and join the rest of the party.
"Hey," a voice said.
I looked over to see Shinso hunched over a table. His head was down, arms over it. He turned his head to face me.
"Wanna try some molly?" he asked, shrugging. He said it so bluntly.
Holy shit. Molly? I'm already high… But fuck that would be so fucking fun.
"Yes," I said, a little too quickly.
Shinso got up, grabbing my hand. We walked over to Shoto's door, opening the door.
"Where are we going?" I asked, Shinso led me through some hallways. The bright colors of the decorations made me trip hard. It was so beautiful. I felt happy being here. The loud music made my heart shake because of the bass. We had to go around many people to get to our destination.
Shinso opened the door to a room, walking in I could see there was black decor everywhere. It was like walking into a gothic horror house. I looked around to see a familiar face, a blonde guy standing next to him.
"Woah, little bunny, you actually came!" Toya laughed. He walked over to me with his friend. Both him and his friend were way taller than my, they stood over me, looking at me with lust in their eyes.
"You're the cute chick Dabi couldn't stop talking about? He was right about you being sexy. I'm Keigo," Keigo introduced. He had a visible eyebrow piercing. His hair was long and shabby so I couldn't spot ear piercings but I wouldn't be surprised if I saw them.
"We came here for some molly," Shinso said, stepping in front of me.
Toya laughed. "Are you sure? I can smell the weed off your breath,"
Shinso nodded.
Toya raised his eyebrows, shrugging. "It's your funeral," he commented.
Shinso led my hand to Toya's coffee table. On the coffee table were some white lines. A $100 bill was rolled up, It seemed Toya and Keigo were already doing some before we got here.
"One line each, that's it dummies," Toya stated. "I don't want anyone dying tonight,"
"For real, the last time the guy's body wouldn't fit in the grave," Keigo joked.
I nodded my head, giggling, sitting down by Shinso. Shinso took the $100 bill and put it by his nose, sniffing the white line like it was nothing. He handed me the bill. I looked at it unsure. Should I really do this? I'm already just fine with being high off weed…
"C'mon be a good girl and do it," Keigo said, watching me intensely.
"Yeah little lady, you can take it, right?" Toya asked, placing his cold hand on the back of my neck.
I nodded my head, I used the bill to sniff up the white powder. I've never done molly when it's crushed up. So it took a couple of tries to get it all in my nose.
"Wow, what a good girl," Toya complimented, patting my back.
Shinso glared at Toya, grabbing my hand.
"We'll get going," he said, standing up.
"Wait, bunny-girl. If you want to feel even more good, take some of this," Toya stated, handing a pill to me.
"What's this?" I asked, my eyes feeling droopy.
"A surprise," he winked.
I nodded my head, not thinking. Toya pinched my cheeks together, inserting the pill into my mouth, his thumb grazing over my lip, I swallowed it without hesitation. I wanted to get fucked up tonight, I trust Toya enough not to kill me.
"Have fun you two," Keigo said, cockily.
Shinso put up his middle finger, grabbing my arm to walk out of the room. He led me back to Shoto's room. Once we settled into the room, we both laid in Shoto's bed right next to each other.
"Why'd you want to try molly with me, you don't even know me?" Shinso asked, his voice sounding more deep.
I looked around the room. I felt euphoria… This is the best I've ever felt. The molly kicked in quickly. My head was spinning, it felt so damn good.
"You're hot," I replied, shrugging. That is one of the reasons as to why I tried molly with this hot stranger. I didn't lie to him or anything.
"You're sexy," he commented, facing me.
"Thank you," I thanked, looking into his lavender eyes. I felt so good, it was so amazing. "This is the best I've ever felt," I admit.
"This is amazing, do you feel the universe spinning?" Shinso asked.
I nodded my head, quickly. "Yes!"
Wait… What the hell…? I sat up, sweating. Shinso used his elbows to prop himself up to look at me.
"What's up?"
"I feel hot," I said, waving my hands to fan me. I could feel heat deep inside my core. I can't ignore this! What the hell is going on?! I panted, putting my thighs together. It's… It's unbearable! I need friction now! It's too hot!
"Don't look!" I yelled, walking over to the couch, which was across the room.
Shinso closed his eyes, his movements slow.
I took off my outfit, I needed to get some air, it's so hot, it isn't going away! I need help, my core was hurting. My black panties had a wet spot on them, I felt it slightly and it was damp, very damp. What did Toya give me?!
"What's goin-"
Shinso made direct eye contact with me. I covered my chest, blushing instantly. Shit! I'm basically naked… I only have my thigh highs and panties right now.
"What happened?" he asked, trying to stay calm.
"I feel so hot! Shinso! It's unbearable, you- You have to help me!" I yelled, panting
Shinso walked over to me, trying to avoid looking at my body. "How can I help you?" he asked.
"I-I don't know!" I replied, rubbing my thighs together.
Shinso looked at me confused. He thought for a second. "Shit. Dabi must've given you some sort of pill to make you… well… you know,"
"Fucking Toya!" I yelled, squirming around. This hurts, I need friction now. I need help now. It doesn't help that I'm feeling so good already.
"Just come here," Shinso said, shaking his head. "I can try to help,"
I nodded my head, sitting next to him. Fuck… He looks so hot, I want him. I want him so badly. Wait. Stop! Why am I thinking like this.
Shinso looked away from me, patting his lap.
I straddled his lap. I need friction, I can't help it… Stop it. Don't do it…
Shinso took a deep breath, grabbing my chin, placing his soft and tender lips on mine. I could feel his hot tongue in my mouth. We swirled our tongues together, it's making me feel more turned on. How is this helping?! He moved his hand to my hips, helping me grind myself on his lap. With his other hand, he groped my boob, kneading it in his hand.
I let out a whimper. It felt so good, I want more.
"M-more," I stuttered, looking down at my panties. I liked seeing the way my panties were grinding against his thigh.
He took my cheeks with his hand, pinching them together. I looked in his eyes, he gave me a sly smile. "Beg some more and I'll think about helping you," he said, taking his hands off my body.
I wanted to cry, I needed relief now! It's too hot, I need it!
"Please Shinso! Please help me," I begged, I could feel tears at the ends of my eyes.
Shinso gave me a smirk, crashing his lips on mine once again. His tongue felt so good, I need him right now… He pinched both of my nipples with his hands, causing my back to arch. I felt myself grinding on him, instantly. He gave me a seductive look in his eyes, placing one of my nipples in his mouth. He swirled his tongue, sucking on it softly. I jolted in pleasure. It all felt too good… I want Shinso to fuck me right now! I don't need foreplay! I just need him now!
"Hey guys-"
Me and Shinso's head shot up to see Izuku, Kirishima, Sero, Bakugou, Denki, and Shoto standing there.
I covered my boobs, getting off of Shinso's lap. The heat in my core was still burning, I know I'm supposed to feel embarrassed but… I just feel even more heated.
"Holy shit Shinso!" Denki yelled, walking over to sit next to me. "You really started without us? Tsk, that's cold,"
Shinso rolled his eyes at the blonde. What did Denki mean by that?!
"I'm just joking, but seriously, shit, if it wasn't for me wanting to come up here then you guys would've had some fun, right?" Denki teased. He wrapped his arm around me, looking down at my squished up boobs.
"Denki, stop being a dick, leave them alone. Let's go," Kirishima said, looking away from me.
"No we should stay," Sero shrugged.
I don't care who stays! I just need to feel relieved right now! They all are hot as fuck so I don't care!!!
"Let's leave," Shoto said, softly. He covered his eyes with his hands.
Bakugou let out a little laugh. I cocked my eyebrow at him. He walked towards me. With one hand he grabbed my hair, tightly. With the other, he held onto my throat.
For some odd reason, I really liked the pain he was inflicting on me.
"This slut wants us to stay, don't you?" he asked. He looked at me as if I was a pathetic whore. My body wanted them to stay but my morality knows it would be such a bad thing to do, especially with all of them being here. Bakugou pulled my legs apart. He laughed. "So wet for us huh?"
I felt so dizzy, I wanted this rude man to touch me everywhere. I don't even like him.
"I-is that true y/n? Do you want us to stay?" Izuku asked, softly. His face was as red as a tomato.
My body answered for me. I nodded my head, desperate for any type of relief. I don't care who does it, I need it right now.
Bakugou smirked at me, his eyes felt as if they were glowing red. Maybe it was the molly or whatever but holy shit… I'm tripping. His eyes were so beautiful...
Shoto walked over to his door, making sure it was locked. As he went to lock the door, everyone came towards me and Bakugou, surrounding us.
"I knew you were a slut," he scoffed. He grabbed me by my hair, pulling me down to the floor. He let go as I sat on the floor. My thighs were squeezing together, I watched as he walked over to Shoto's bed. He sat down on it, spreading his legs a little bit. He looked so sexy right now…
"Hey! Don't be so rough," Kirishima scolded, bending down to get on my level. He grabbed my cheek, caressing it. "You okay?" he asked, concerned. He tried to keep his eyes away from my boobs.
I nodded my head. He was so sweet, if I wasn't feeling how I was, I would've asked for his number. I feel pathetic that they are all witnessing me look so lewd. God… I just want this feeling between my legs to go away!
"Hey slut! Get your ass over here," Bakugou demanded, rolling his eyes. I looked at him, feeling so out of it. I felt so good right now yet so bad at the same time. My eyes were only focusing on Bakugou. I feel like I'm floating…
"You should probably listen to him," Kirishima said, giving me a smile.
I started to stand up, taking Kirishima's advice. If Kirishima thinks I should listen to Bakugou then I probably should. "Hey!" Bakugou yelled.
I looked at him confused. Why was he yelling at me right now!? I didn't even do anything!
"Get on all fours and crawl over to me like the bitch you are," he finished, pushing his ashy blonde hair back. He sounded stern. It really made me interested in that asshole's personality. Was he born a dickhead or made into one?
I looked around at everyone. Sero lit back up his joint, sitting on the couch with Shinso, Denki, and Shoto. Izuku and Kirishima were making sure I was feeling fine, standing close to me.
"Okay…" I agreed, getting on all fours. My knees and hands dragged their way over to Bakugou. I was so dizzy, I wanted him so bad… Wait… No I do want him. I can't even say I don't want to do this because I do. I want him to fuck me.
I could hear Sero laughing. I don't care, I may look like a pathetic slut but I need this.
Hearing footsteps behind me, I turned around, slowly. I sat up, seeing Denki recording me as I crawled over to Bakugou. His phone was keeping close to my wet panties. I was kind of embarrassed that he was recording but I think it will be fine… He wouldn't release the footage, right?
"C'mon babe, go on," Denki said, grabbing my face and turning it over to Bakugou. He gave my ass a firm slap, the pain felt so good.
I continued to crawl. My boobs bounced slightly as I crawled. I couldn't care less, though I know Denki is loving every second. I could see a tent being built up under his robe. I shook my head, getting back to my main focus, Bakugou. I reached Shoto's bed, kneeling down. Bakugou looked at me, grabbing my chin so that I could face him. I could barely keep my eyes open, I needed him, badly.
"Touch me now…" I mumbled. It was embarrassing to tell this sexy asshole that I wanted him. He's offering so I might as well.
"I don't think I will. I hate sluts like you," he said, venom in his voice.
I couldn't even argue with him. I was feeling too horny to care whether he was going to please me or not. Why the hell would he make me crawl over to his ass if he wasn't going to please me. I'm starting to get irritated, but oh well… I could always please myself.
My hand went to my clothed slit. I'm in a room full of men touching myself… I would've never expected this to happen when I came to this party. I needed to relieve myself, I'd feel shameful if I wasn't high. But I'm high as hell and I need this. No one is helping me… I can't stop myself. My core was burning… Nothing else matters but this.
"Aw, poor bunny. Come here, I'll show you some love," Sero said, patting his lap. I looked over at him, ready to crawl over to him. I'm so desperate… I don't care who it is. I felt like crying… I really needed someone to touch me.
Denki moved the camera to my face, zooming out to look at my body.
"So sexy…" he commented. I felt flustered by his comment, I grabbed onto the end of his robe, desperately. He was the closest person near me. I bent down tugging his clothing. I looked into his golden eyes, giving him a whiny look. I wanted him to get the signal that I needed him. The camera shined in my face, he smirked.
He reached down to my level, grabbing my face, he placed his soft lips on mine. The camera recorded us two. I liked it, I liked seeing myself kissing Denki in the camera. He grabbed my boob, making me moan a bit. He squeezed it, teasing my nipple.
"Denki… touch me…" I moaned, feeling my thighs rub together.
"I think Mr Grumpy Pants actually has something to say," Denki giggled, wagging his finger over for me to look at Bakugou. I looked over at Bakugou confused, he was glaring at Denki. Why was he glaring? I thought he didn't want anything to do with me?
"Tch," Bakugou scoffed. He grabbed the back of my neck, giving it a firm squeeze. I squeaked as he led me over to Shoto's bed. "Listen here you little cock tease, I'm not going to ever kiss you or even make you feel good but you're going to get on your knees and suck my cock like the whore you are,"
"Yes sir…"
Why the hell did I say yes… He's so goddamn mean! But holy fuck I do want to suck his cock right now. It won't make my painful pleasure go away, though I could try.
Bakugou let out a small chuckle, sitting at the edge of Shoto's bed. I bent down, on my knees, ready to do whatever he wanted me to. I was caught up in the moment. The lust running through my body made me feel no shame.
Bakugou pulled up his black robe, revealing black boxers. He was hard, I could see his cock throbbing through the boxers.
"It's too big…" I mumbled, my eyes fluttering. I wasn't lying I guess… I just wanted to feed his ego though.
"You're going to be a good little slut and take it," he said, in a serious tone.
When he said that I could feel myself getting more turned on, I don't even know how this is possible…
Someone tapped on my back. I turned around to see Izuku. He gave me a sinister smirk… There was something wrong with his pure eyes from earlier… They were filled with pure lust. It gave me the chills.
"Don't be mean Kacchan. She deserves something too," Izuku said, tracing his hands on my curves. I felt so alive, my senses were reacting so differently due to my high.
"Do whatever the hell you want, Deku. All I care about is cumming deep in her throat,"
Izuku smiled, grabbing my butt. I let out a whimper, his hands were rough. I could see some scarring on them but I wasn't going to ask how he got them.
"Stand up for a second," Izuku ordered, he wasn't messing around. His tone made my knees feel weak. His innocent act has finally stopped, he is truly himself right now… And I'm loving every second of it.
I listened to him, standing up. Izuku grabbed my neck, pulling me in to kiss him. I had no chance to even react as his tongue slipped in my mouth. He kissed me, sloppily, grabbing my ass with his hands. I let him. His tongue felt every inch of my mouth, biting my lip as he broke our kiss.
"Good girl," he praised.
I blushed at his comment. He gave me a quick wink before laying onto the floor by Shoto's bed. I looked at him confused.
"Come here," he ordered. I did as I was told, bending down to look at Izuku more thoroughly. The freckles on his face were so cute. "Sit on my face," he said, nonchalantly.
Hearing those words made me want to shout in happiness, finally… I could stop this heat. I wanted to just kiss him then and there, instead I did as I was told, sitting down near his face. My clothed cunt hovered over him slightly.
"Hey, pay attention to me too whore," Bakugou said, catching my full attention. He reached inside his boxers, pulling out his cock. He was hard so it stood upwards. It was nice and long, I can tell he was really turned on due to how pink his tip was. His dick was a bit above average.
I could almost feel myself drooling. Before I could place my hands on his cock, Izuku wanted some attention. His tongue rubbed against my clothed clit, making me jolt in pleasure. He was the only thing I cared about right now. He began to suck on my good spot, causing me to whimper, I wanted to remove my panties to feel even more but Bakugou grabbed a fist full of my hair.
"I said pay attention to me too," he boldly stated, lining up his cock with my mouth. "Open your mouth," he ordered.
I opened my mouth, sticking out my tongue.
He looked at me, kind of shocked. His shock didn't last for long as he furrowed his eyebrows, glaring down at me. "Tch. You're such a disgusting whore," he said, slapping his pink tip on my tongue.
Without hesitation he pushed my head down to take his length in my mouth. I could feel tears brim at the ends of my eyes. I gagged, coughing as he took it out.
"Go on, I'm not fucking doing everything myself," he said, bluntly.
I nodded, taking his tip in my mouth. I sucked on it, going down more and more. He let out a few grunts. His grunts made me feel butterflies. He may be a rude boy but holy shit his grunts are to die for. I'd definitely do this again just to hear him at least whimper.
"You're doing so well Y/n, maybe I should remove these panties hm? I really want to taste you," Izuku hummed, toying with the brims of my underwear.
"Y-yes Izuku… Please…" I mumbled, bringing my hand to Bakugou's cock and grabbing it. I rubbed up and down his cock as I spoke to Izuku.
"Speak up, slut," Bakugou ordered.
"Please take them off Izuku, I'm begging you," I said, my voice cracking. I wanted it to be taken off so bad.
I looked down to see Izuku smirking to himself. He slid underneath me, leaving me with no one under me. Without a care in the world, my hand found its way under my panties, rubbing my own clit, softly, to ease the heat, I couldn't take it any longer. I could see Bakugou smiling, looking away, hoping I didn't catch his smile.
"Shoto, mind lending me a hand?" Izuku asked.
I didn't hear a word from Shoto, I continued to use my mouth and hand on Bakugou to please him, but I needed the pleasure! Not him!
"Do you mind if I touch you Y/n?" Shoto asked, politely.
I stopped sucking on Bakugou's cock to look at Shoto. I nodded my head. "Shoto please touch me," I said, quietly.
He smiled at me, grabbing both of my cheeks to pull into a kiss. His kiss was passionate and warm. It made my heart flutter. This was nothing like the other kisses, his was genuine.
"I'll make you feel good, I promise,"
I could feel someone moving my legs slightly. I looked down to see some familiar green hair.
"Don't mind me," he smiled, moving my panties to the side. It had gotten me so excited, my heart was racing, I wanted him to satisfy me.
"Holy shit this is gonna get good," Denki commented, bringing his phone up to the four of us. He stood to the side, making sure to get a good view of me and these men. I wasn't going to protest against him recording, I was too in the moment.
I continued to suck on Bakugou's cock, letting my tongue go on the side, earning more grunts from him. I could tell he liked what I was doing.
"Y/n~" Izuku called out. I could feel his hot breath inch closer to my now exposed slit. Within the blink of an eye Izuku's tongue pressed itself against my clit, sucking it, softly.
I couldn't help but moan. "Izuku- It-It's so good, please don't stop," I moaned, bucking my hips to match the rhythm of Izuku's tongue. He knows how to please a woman… I've never felt this before. His tongue knew what to do. He wrapped his arms around my thighs, holding me down, stopping me from squirming.
"Bitch, keep on sucking, you aren't fucking finished," Bakugou said, panting, lightly. I could tell he was either getting close or was very horny. All I could do was smile in ecstasy. I rubbed the tip of his cock, making him tense up. My tongue glided up and down his shaft as my hand continuously rubbed his tip. "Fuck…" he groaned, quietly.
Izuku's tongue kept gliding over my clit, it felt so good. Just when I thought it couldn't get better I could feel someone's hand grabbing my ass. I let out a moan, the hand reached further down, making me get butterflies.
"Ah~ W-wait-" I moaned, feeling a finger inserted inside me. This was heaven. This is exactly what I needed.
"Don't worry y/n, my slender fingers will take care of you," Shoto commented.
His finger squirmed around in my gummy walls, I couldn't help but tighten around it. It felt too good. Another finger was added by surprise. I let out another lewd moan. This was all feeling too good. Shoto pumped his fingers in and out of me, going slowly. It felt even better when Izuku started to suck on my clit, causing me to arch my back.
"Holy shit guys, you need to come and take a better look at this… It's so… It's so hot up close," Denki said, his breath hitching. His camera was brought down to Izuku and Shoto, showing everything they were doing to me.
Shoto's fingers curved inwards, making me whimper in pleasure. Tears were forming in my eyes, I needed to release soon… It's so unbearable. His fingers felt so amazing. They kept curving, I tightened with each curve. He was getting real close to my g-spot. If he kept this up at this rate, I'll probably be cumming soon.
I needed to focus my attention on Bakugou now. His pants were getting more noticeable.
"Is Mr Grumpy Pants going to cum?" I asked, teasingly.
Bakugou panted, annoyed of me. He grabbed my head, pushing it down. I probably shouldn't have teased him… He bobbed my head up and down. The pace kept picking up. I couldn't even breathe at this point, I tried to through my nostrils but it was so hard to. He let go of my head, I stopped sucking his dick, gasping for air.
"That'll teach you whore. Now hurry this shit up. I'm close," Bakugou said, laying his back down on Shoto's bed.
"O-okay…" I muttered.
Shoto… He's hitting my spot! I…!
"Shoto! More! Just like that please!" I squirmed, rubbing Bakugou's cock faster.
With that being said, Shoto's pace quickened with his fingers, curling them in the right spots. Izuku's tongue helped try to reach my climax, he used his thumb to help alongside his tongue.
"Izuku- Ah~ M-more!"
It was all feeling too good. This is what I wanted… it's what I needed! My knot in my stomach was building up and I couldn't stop myself from releasing it.
Bakugou propped himself up on his elbows, looking at my face.
"Do-Don't stop!" I yelled, using my hand to grab on to Izuku's fluffy green hair. At this point I had to stop focusing on Bakugou's pleasure and start focusing on my climax. I could feel Izuku smile, going faster. I felt so… So fucking amazing. "I'm goin- I'm cumming!"
After I said that, the knot in my stomach was released, I felt so alive… Stars were everywhere. I felt lightheaded and dazed. I shuddered, taking some deep breaths. As I was taking the deep breaths, I could feel warm liquid hit my face. I opened my eyes to see Bakugou looking at me. His face looked relaxed, his cocked bounced up as more cum went on to my face.
He sat up, putting his dick back in his boxers. He grabbed my face, admiring his work. He grabbed out his phone, snapping a photo of me covered in his cum. "Stupid girl," he mumbled, getting off Shoto's bed. Bakugou stretched a little bit before walking over to Shoto's door. "I'll be doing some shots downstairs, call me if you need me," he mumbled, taking his leave. He seemed more calm yet still grumpy. I wonder what his thoughts were at that moment.
Shoto's fingers slid out of me and Izuku got out from under me. Izuku's face was covered in sweat and my juices.
"You were tasty," he said, giggling.
Shoto looked at me and his hand. "Want to try some Izuku?" he asked.
Izuku nodded, licking up Shoto's fingers which had my cum on them. I was still panting from my climax but just seeing that gesture made me feel horny all over again.
"You guys I swear, she tastes so good," Izuku said, using his robe to wipe off the juices that were on his chin.
Ding!
Izuku looked at his phone. He rolled his eyes. "Gotta run, my girlfriend needs me," he said, getting up.
GIRLFRIEND?! WAIT! WAIT! WHAT?! My eyes widened, my heart started to swell out of guilt. I'm… I'm a homewrecker…?
Izuku snickered, looking at my face. "I'm just fucking with you, we are on and off," he laughed. "Now, you guys have fun, alright? Maybe I'll be back for some more," he winked. Izuku put back on his shy act, mocking me with it. "S-see you later Y/n! Y… You were so hot!"
I just stared at him in disbelief as he walked away. He is… He is something else.
"I'm pretty sure I just came without even touching myself," Denki commented, breaking me out of my trance. He put his phone away. He kneeled down to my level, placing his hand on my cheek to wipe off Bakugou's cum. He gave me a smile, pecking a kiss on my lips. "You were so good babe! Now, Now… Are you going to be a good girl for us?" he asked, turning my head over to Shinso, Kirishima, and Sero.
The three of them stared at me in a daze, they looked intoxicated by me. Why not finish what I started with the men in this room?
Quickly, I nodded my head yes. I had no idea what I was getting into.
"I'm going to need someone to record this shit," Sero said, putting his joint out on his ash tray. He grabbed out his phone, looking for a place to put his phone. He set it down on a nearby chair.
"I can record, don't worry," Shoto said, calmly. He picked up Sero's phone, ready to record the scene that was bound to happen.
I walked over to the couch the other boys were on, sitting down. I was waiting for them to tell me what to do. The heat in between my legs wasn't fully gone but it was less intense than before.
"Y/n why don't we do a little role-play?" Denki asked, grabbing his mask. He put on his mask, giggling, taking a seat next to me.
"Are we seriously making a porno right now? I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable," Kirishima said, crossing his arms.
"I-I'm not uncomfortable or anything I swear! I just want to finish what I started," I said, looking down at my hands. I'm quite embarrassed but it's my fault for being all lewd in the first place, I should just continue on with this. It'll be fun anyway, this is a once in a lifetime thing. "I'll do whatever you want Denki,"
I could hear Denki getting excited. "Shoto! Bring the camera over here!" Denki ordered. Shoto nodded him head, bringing the camera up close to Denki and I. "Get on your knees,"
I did as I was told, getting on my knees on the couch. Denki sat down in front of me, grabbing my chin. Kirishima, Sero, and Shinso just sat on the same couch admiring my looks as I was on my knees.
"3…2…1… Action," Shoto said, nonchalantly.
"I don't know whether I want to fuck your throat or slit it open…" Denki said, his thumb rubbing over my lips.
My heart race quickened. I never tried kinky stuff like role-play before. I guess tonight will have to be a first for everything.
"Pfft! Haha… So fucking cringey," Shinso laughed, rubbing his eyes. His eye bags felt as if they were darker than before. Maybe I was still high? I did burn off a lot of my high with my last orgasm.
"Hey! You're ruining the video!" Denki whined, taking off his mask to show his frustration.
Shoto paused the video, waiting for their feud to settle.
"I'll show her what some real role-play looks like, c'mere," Shinso said, patting down his lap. "Come, sit down,"
I blushed at what he was saying.
"This is so unfair!" Denki protested, crossing his arms.
"I guess you'll have to wait your turn," I said, boldly. I felt more confident now that I was starting to get comfortable with these guys.
Denki liked the sound of that.
I made my way to Shinso, sitting on his lap like he told me to. Shinso put on his mask, nodding his head over to Shoto. That was Shoto's signal to start recording.
"Are you gonna hump my cock like the little bunny you are?" he asked.
My face was heating up at this… He was being so lewd, it didn't help that his face was under a mask so I couldn't see him saying it with his mouth. I could feel his hard dick against my panties. It made me feel turned on knowing he was already hard.
Shinso shook his head, grabbing my hips, grinding me against his boner. It snapped me out of my thoughts, my attention was fully on my pleasure now.
I whimpered at the friction. It felt nice being on top of his lap. I wish I could grab onto his purple locks as I did this.
"Take off your panties. Animals don't wear clothes. Go on, take them off," he said.
"Okay," I responded, getting off of him. I slowly took off my panties, making sure that Shinso was watching me. Little did I know everyone in the room was watching me, lustfully, waiting for their chance to pounce on me like a wild animal. I was only thinking of Shinso right now.
Shinso lifted up his black robe, showing some dark purple boxers. I sat down on his lap once again, no panties on. The only thing I had on I guess was the bunny ears.
Shoto made sure to record us, closely, zooming in on my exposed pussy and Shinso's boxers.
"Are you ready to rub against me like a bunny in heat?" Shinso asked, laying back, lazily.
I nodded my head, feeling butterflies. I could tell I was already wet, Shinso's voice was so sexy….
Shinso took out his cock. It was a little longer than Bakugou's. His carpet matched the drapes, his robe lifted up higher, showing some abs. It made me almost drool at the sight. I wish I could see his whole body.
"Here's what you're going to do, you're going to grind your clit against my dick until I cum, got it?" Shinso explained.
"I- Okay," I agreed. I've never did this with a guy before… I hope I don't mess this up… I placed my hands on his knees, leaning my body backwards and my pussy forward towards Shinso's cock. My legs were straddling his thighs.
He grabbed his dick, helping me line it up with my folds. I could see him oozing with precum. I took a deep breath, rubbing my clit on the tip of his cock. I felt so euphoric.
I kept trying to grind myself on him, it's my first time doing this! I'm not going to be a pro at it. I could hear little pants coming from Shinso as I continued grinding myself on his tip. His pants made me feel better, at least I knew that I wasn't doing too bad.
I whimpered, wanting to go faster but I didn't really know how to. I furrowed my eyebrows, I wanted to whine. I felt like this wasn't enough.
"Let me help you," he panted, pushing my hips down to stop the movement.
I looked at him confused. Was I doing bad at this? I started to feel a bit down knowing I wasn't probably doing it correctly.
"… Am I doing something wrong?" I asked, softly.
"What? No! I just see you're struggling a bit so I wanted to help you out," Shinso said, shaking his head.
I sighed in relief. That confirmed that I wasn't doing anything wrong. I don't like being selfish in bed, I want my partner to feel just as good as me.
"Move guys," he ordered, waving to the side. I'm assuming he was talking about Sero, Kirishima, and Denki.
They all listened moving. Shinso grabbed my body, laying me down on the couch.
"What are you doing?" I asked, covering my eyes. I felt too embarrassed being so exposed while lying down.
"I'll be taking some charge, okay little bunny?" He said, pushing my legs up to my chest.
I squirmed a little, I was so flustered, I felt too exposed.
Shinso took the head of his cock, rubbing it in between my folds.
This felt so much better, it was perfect. The way his tip glided over my clit felt amazing. I moaned, silently.
The boys stood over us, watching everything that was going down. Shoto made sure to get an angle that saw everything.
He tapped his tip against my clit, causing little shocks of pleasure.
"A-ah~" I moaned. This felt so different to what I was used to, I liked it.
"You like that?" He asked. He sounded genuinely confused. I bit my lip, nodding. I didn't want him to stop.
"Don't stop…" I mumbled.
I could hear him let out a chuckle. "Whatever you want, bunny,"
He took his cock, rubbing it with a faster pace against my folds, hitting my clit over and over.
"So good~" I moaned, feeling my legs tremble.
He continued rubbing himself on me, making me feel amazing each time he went up and down.
"This is so hot…" Kirishima said, quietly.
I looked at his eyes, he was in a trance, looking at what was going on. It made me feel flattered. His shark-like teeth were showing as his mouth hung agape.
"Kirishima…" I moaned.
He turned to look at me, his face a bright red hue. "Y-yeah?" he asked. His voice cracked, letting me know that he was either anticipating for me or because he's shy. He does seem more of the shy type, he is very respectful.
"Touch me," I said, groping my own boobs. I arched my back, feeling Shinso's cock move faster against my folds.
Kirishima covered his eyes, embarrassed. He took a deep breath, placing his hand on my boob, squeezing it, softly. I let out a mewl, his hands were so big yet not as rough as the other boys. He continued groping me, not looking at my face. He was too embarrassed.
"Sh-Shit! I'm gonna cum!" Shinso exclaimed, panting harshly. His cock went faster against my folds, twitching. He then started cumming all over my stomach.
I propped myself up on my elbows, admiring the cum that was dripping from the tip of his cock.
"Sorry… You were just too hot, I couldn't stop," Shinso said, sitting on the couch, he took off his mask. His face was all sweaty, a pink hue on his cheeks. I sat up as well. Shoto paused the video, his breath hitching. I can see that he was turned on by the sight of us.
"It's no problem," I said, reassuring him. I actually like it when boys cum fast, it makes me feel good about myself.
"Don't worry about this Shinso, you were just making her wet for us to finish off," Sero said, stretching his arms.
"This is going to get real messy," Denki added, licking his lips. His gaze was kept on my lips.
Shit… I totally forgot I had three more guys to satisfy. My stamina was already running low. All of this pent up energy was making me tired.
"Go ahead, I'm just going to take a nap here," Shinso said, yawning. He laid his head on the couch's arm. I guess his stamina had run out.
"Let's take her over there to the bed, she was being a good girl," Sero said, grabbing me off the couch. He slung me over his shoulder. His strength surprised me, it made me more interested in him. He placed me on the bed, not too harsh yet not too soft.
"You're going to want to record everything~" Denki said, talking to Shoto. Shoto just gave him a nod.
"Wait guys," Kirishima started. He sat on the bed with me, giving me a serious look. "Are you sure you want to do this? I don't want you to feel like you're obligated to," he continued. I could tell that consent meant a lot to him, it made my heart flutter.
"I'm sure," I replied, nodding my head.
He looked at me unsure, rubbing the back of his neck.
"I promise that I'm sure, I'll show you," I said, my hand trailed up his thigh. I teased him, inching closer to the tent that was building up in his robe.
"That's your cue to start recording," Denki winked, joining Kirishima and I on the bed. Shoto brought the camera to us, making sure to record. His hands knew what they were doing, having me doubt if this was his first time recording anything.
Denki grabbed my face, placing his lips on mine. He kissed me passionately. His tongue slipped into my mouth, exploring every inch. He was a pretty damn good kisser, his hand hitched up my waist, grabbing my boob.
I let out a moan. From the corner of my eye I can see Sero making his way over to me, he put on his mask. Sero sat behind me, grabbing my boobs, pinching my nipples. I arched my back. It hurt but felt so good.
"You're going to be a good little slut for me?" Sero asked, his raspy voice standing out to me.
I nodded my head, fast. Sero was a very attractive guy, under the mask he had a cute nose ring on. I wish I could look at him as he pleased me, I hate these stupid fucking masks.
Within a blink of an eye Sero pushed my face into the sheets on the bed. My back was arched as my ass was in the air. His hand was holding my hair, making sure my face was down.
"I'm going to be the lucky one who gets to fuck you. Make sure you please the other guys too, I can't be too selfish," Sero stated, shrugging his shoulder.
"H-how do I do that?" I asked, turning my head so I can speak properly instead of making muffled noises in the sheets.
I could feel Sero rolling his eyes at me. "You're going to suck them off, stupid girl," he said.
How am I supposed to do that?! My face is in the sheets! "Uh… my face is kind of in the sheets right now…"
"Stop being a smart ass," Sero said, bluntly, taking his hand off of my head. He gave my ass a firm slap, annoyed by my comment.
I lifted my head up, wincing.
"You're going to keep you back arched," Sero ordered.
So needy… Ugh whatever, I looked at Kirishima and Denki. They sat down in front of me, pillows supporting their backs to sit up. Denki happily pulled out his dick for me. Kirishima still looked at me unsure. He just sighed, taking out his cock from his boxers as well.
Holy shit… Kirishima's dick was huge! It was huge in length and his girth was a perfect amount… I want this boy to be the one to fuck me! I looked at Denki's cock, his was big but not as big as Kirishima's I still like it though. He had a black little strip down there to match with his hair, I wondered if it's dyed or not.
"Go on babe, touch me," Denki said, placing his hands behind his head. His voice snapped me out of my thoughts about his hair.
I nodded, grabbing his cock, rubbing up and down. He was twitching at my touch. He let out a laugh, hitching his breath. I didn't leave Kirishima out though, I used my other hand to rub his tip and then go down to his shaft. He let out a whimper. His whimper made my stomach flutter.
"Don't forget about me," Sero said, grabbing onto my ass. I could feel his tip teasing my entrance.
"H-hurry up!" I urged. He kept teasing me, not putting his cock in. I felt my heart skip beats, anticipating to be filled up with his cum.
"Do you think… you could… Suck on it…?" Kirishima asked, seemingly ashamed for asking such a lewd question.
Without hesitation I placed my lips around his dick. My tongue swirled around his tip, earning a moan from him. I continued rubbing Denki with my other hand though, so he didn't feel left out.
Fuck! Oh my god…! Sero had slid himself inside me without warning. My walls clenched around him. He was so big!
"S-Sero!" I yelled, trying my best to keep my back arched.
Sero bucked his hips, going slow and deep. He knew exactly where to hit my good spots.
"Focus on us too!" Denki said, twitching in my hand. He liked seeing me get fucked by someone else. I tried my best to move both of my hands to please Kirishima and Denki but Sero's cock kept going deeper.
"You like that?" Sero asked, grabbing my hair. He pulled on it tightly. My walls clenched around his dick as he tugged on my hair.
"Y-yes!"
I kept trying my best to focus on Denki and Kirishima, rubbing their cocks up and down. I licked on them occasionally, making their dicks wet and sloppy so it's easier to use my hands on them.
"Wow y/n… this feels so good," Kirishima praised, letting out a whine.
"He's not wrong, keep this up and I'll be cumming soon," Denki said, with a smile on his face.
Kirishima's tip was throbbing, I could tell that he was getting close, his dick was probably more sensitive than the others.
I took my hand, my thumb grazing his tip as my hand went up and down his shaft. I could tell that sent him over the edge.
"N…No. Stop I'm gonna cum," he said, shutting his eyes.
I smirked, taking his tip in my mouth, sucking on it. I rubbed up and down as I sucked, feeling his balls start to tighten.
"Ah~ Stop! No, I'm cumming!" he announced, bucking his hips into my mouth. I could feel him warm cum shooting into my mouth. I tried my best to swallow every last bit. I continued sucking as he panted for air.
I turned to look at Denki, his eyes were widened when he stared at me taking Kirishima's cock. Without warning cum shot up on my cheek. It looks like seeing the way I took on his friend made him cum right then and there.
"Shit. I didn't even mean to do that…" Denki said, pushing his hair back. There was a little sweat on his forehead, he must've been very concentrated.
I could hear Sero laughing. "Good job, now I can have you all to myself. You boys are going to want to move," he warned Kirishima and Denki. The two boys got off of the bed, walking to wherever they pleased.
I was in for it, Sero grabbed my cheeks, pinching them. Shoto moved the camera to my face. "Smile for the camera, don't be rude," he added, forcing my face to make a smile with his hands as he pounded me from behind.
I tried my best to smile, I probably looked pathetic.
Sero stopped grabbing on to my face, instead he put his hands on my hips, bucking them on to his cock. It all felt too good, the knot in my stomach was so close to being undone. Every time he pounded me, I felt like I was seeing stars.
Sero continued going hard and slow. He picked up the pace though, signifying that he was almost ready to cum. Each time he slid into me I could feel my ecstasy being brought closer and closer to me.
He continued to fuck me, I moaned each time. I was getting close. I wanted to feel his hot cum inside me, I needed it to run down my thighs. I was already feeling so drunk off of this messy and sloppy sex. The thought of his cum made me tighten around Sero.
"Fuck, baby, you're so tight right now. Are you gonna cum?" he asked, using one hand to rub my clit and the other to keep himself pounding into me.
The knot was being undone! I couldn't hold it in any longer. He just felt so good. He was rubbing me in all the right ways, there's no way I can stop now!
"Y-yes! Sero! I'm cumming~" I moaned, gripping on to the bed sheets.
He pounded harder and faster, gripping on my hair, grabbing right where my scalp is.
"I'm cumming!" he yelled, going faster.
I was seeing stars, I couldn't stop panting. I was twitching at this point. To top it off, I could feel warm liquid shooting inside of me. The warmth made me want to collapse onto the bed… It all felt too good. Sero pulled himself out of me, laying down next to me.
Shoto stopped recording, looking in his boxers. His face was red. He definitely came into his boxers. I let out a laugh, feeling the high of the sex I just had.
"That… was amazing, thank you guys…" I said, feeling myself drift to sleep. I couldn't keep my eyes open, my stamina was so low…
"Such a good girl,"
"Gonna do this again,"
Wait… Holy shit. I seriously just fucked multiple guys on camera. What the hell is wrong with me?
-
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maybe-boys-do-love · 23 days ago
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It's wild that the whole global trend of gay-focused happy ending romance shows and movies has only been going on for *looks at calendar* a measly ten years!
Just ten years ago. 2014. That's when you get the discovery of a market for queer romance series and films with happy endings. That year the OG Love Sick in Thailand came out. Brazil puts out The Way He Looks, which deserves so much more credit than it receives for influencing the aeshtetics of the genre. Looking premieres on HBO, and despite low ratings, it's an important touchstone. South Korea has the darker Night Flight. And, despite Nickelodeon’s censorship and shifting the program from tv to its website, the Legend of Korra confirms Korrasami in its season finale.
The next year, in 2015, we get Love Sick season 2, and China, pre-censorship laws has a few options: Happy Together (not the Wong Kar Wai one lol), Mr. X and I, and Falling In Love with a Rival. Canada, premieres Schitt's Creek. In the US, Steven Universe reveals Garnet as a romantic fusion between two female characters, and will proceed to just be so sapphic. Norwegian web series Skam premieres and sets up a gay protagonist for its third season, which will drop in 2016 and entirely change the global media landscape.
Then, 2016! This is the MOMENT. That aforementioned Skam season happens. Japan puts out the film version of Ossan's Love and anime series Yuri!!! on Ice. China has the impactful Addicted Heroine, which directly leads to increased censorship. The US has Moonlight come out and take home the Oscar. In Thailand, GMMTV enters the BL game and Thai BL explodes: Puppy Honey, SOTUS, Water Boyy, Make It Right, plus, the Thai Gay OK Bangkok, which, like its influence, Looking, is more in the queer tradition but introduces two dramatically important directors to the Thai BL industry, Aof and Jojo.
By 2017, Taiwan enters the game with its History series. Korea’s BL industry actually kicks off with Method and Long Time No See. Thailand’s got too many BLs to mention. Call Me By Your Name, though not a happy ending, makes a big splash that will send ripples through the whole genre, and God's Own Country offers a gruff counter-argument to problematic age differences and twink obsessions. This is also the year of Netflix reboot of One Day At a Time bringing some wlw to the screen, and the Disney Channel has a main character come out as ‘gay’ on Andi Mack ( I’m am ready to throw fists with anyone who thinks the Disney Channel aesthetic isn’t a part of current queer culture). And I'd be remiss not to mention the influential cult-following of chaotic web-series The Gay and Wondrous Life of Caleb Gallo: "Sometimes things that are expensive...are worse."
All this happened, and we hadn’t even gotten to Love, Simon, Elite, or ITSAY, yet.
Prior to all this there are some major precursors some of which signaled and primed a receptive market, others influenced the people who'd go on to create the QLs. Most significantly you have Glee, and its ending really makes way for the new era that can center gay young people in a world where queerness, due to easy access to digital information, is less novel to the characters. And the QL book and graphic novel landscape was way ahead of the television and film industries, directly creating many of the stories that the latter industries used.
There's plenty of the traditional queer media content (tragic melodramas and independent camp comedies) going on prior to and alongside QL, and there are some outlying queer romance films with happy endings that precede the era but feel very much akin to QL genre tropes and goals (Saving Face, The Wedding Banquet, Big Eden, Maurice, My Beautiful Launderette, and Weekend). I don't mean to suggest that everything I’ve listed ought to be categorized as QL.
Rather, I want to point out how all of these new-era queer romance works are in a big queer global conversation together, in the creation of a new contemporary genre, a genre that has more capacity and thematic interest to include digital technology and normalize cross-cultural relationships than other genres (there's a reason fansubs and web platforms are so easily accepted and integrated to the proliferation genre).
You're not too late to be part of the conversation. Imagine being alive in the 1960s and 70s and participating in the blossoming of the sci-fi genre. That flowering is where gay romance sits now. Join the party.
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