#I'd be very open to a part two if the response is good. just saying ;)

[darlingsblackbook]

Zayne × Nurse!Reader - Part Six

The breaking point

Part One - Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five

Love & Deepspace Masterlist

I | I was already tired, not just the kind of tired after a long shift, but the kind that’s been weighing down on your chest for weeks. The kind you try to ignore by staying busy.

II | I had a stack of paperwork in my arms, folders that needed filing, numbers- just, paperwork. It was not my favourite task to do, but gave me something to do. Something that I could distract myself with.

III | I walk behind the cardiology reception desk with my eyes low, just to pick up the rest of the papers I need to continue. Pretending I do not hear the familiar whispering tones that always seemed to settle when I was nearby. I’ve gotten good at pretending. I pretend a lot lately.

IV | “She’s acting weird,” one of them said. Her voice had that hushed excitement people use when talking about someone just out of earshot. "Don't you think?”

V | "Acting?” The other voice followed like venom wrapped in silk. “She’s always been weird. You remember how she used to stutter around Doctor Zayne? Now suddenly she’s pretending he doesn’t exist? Please.”

VI | I gripped the folders tighter, like holding onto them would anchor me to something solid. My cheeks burned. I knew people noticed, but I didn’t think… I didn’t think it had gotten this bad.

VII | “Maybe she figured out he’s way out of her league,” The same voice said, not even trying to lower her voice anymore. “Smart girl, even if it took her long enough.”

VIII | I didn’t look at them, just took what I needed and left to continue with my work. Or I tried to, but one of them- the one with the snake venom voice, stepped just slightly into my path. Her shoulder knocking into mine, sending every single piece of paper flying out of my arms like leaves caught in wind.

IX | The sound of paper hitting the floor echoed down the hall. My stomach dropped along with it.

X | “Oops,” She said, far too sweet.“You alright? You’re almost shaking. It can't be because of nerves, though. I mean, Doctor Zayne isn’t even around right now."

XI | I just stared at her. For the first time, not with fear. Not even with sadness. Just... disbelief. “What did you say?”

XII | Before she could open her mouth again, another voice cut through - calm, cold, and unmistakably unimpressed. "That is enough."

XIII | I felt a shock, like a lightning bolt struck me, at the sound of that voice. Zayne... I could hear his footsteps as he approached, yet did not dare to turn to face him. He wasn’t rushing at all, but something in his aura made the air shift. The same way it does right before a thunderstorm.

XIV | The nurse paled. “Doctor Zayne- I was just-"

“If I were in your place, I'd be very careful about my next words” Zayne interrupted, his eyes hard. “Do you even get any work done, or do you just sit around and whisper to each other all day?”

XV | She stumbled for a response, but he did not give her a chance to come up with any excuse. "Pick the papers up."

XVI | She blinked, as if she could not believe what she was hearing. How he was talking to her. Ironic, seeing how she had been talking to me. It's not funny anymore when you become the target. "D-doctor Za-"

XVII | "Did you not hear what I said? Pick. Them. Up." Zayne demanded, voice just as cold as the evol he wielded.

XVIII | Everyone was quiet. The kind of silence that buzzes behind your ears. She bent down with shaking hands, gathering papers like her life - or job - depended on it. Maybe, in that moment, it did. When she had gathered them all, she stood up but kept her head down, avoiding everyone's gaze. Then, she tried to hand the papers over to Zayne.

XIX | His eyes didn’t even flicker toward her. “Not to me,” he said, then nodded his head my way. “Her.”

She turned toward me like I was a executioner. She shoved them into my arms with a scowl but I could see her hands trembling.

XX | “Now apologize,” Zayne said, voice still flat. “Like a professional. Not like a child forced to say ‘sorry’ at recess.”

XXI | Again, the bitch started blinking as if they were as dry as a desert. “Doctor Zayne-”

XXII | “Apologize,” Zayne snapped. “Or you will not have a place in this team anymore.”

XXIII | The silence turned deadly. Her mouth twitched. Then, finally, through gritted teeth, she forced out, “I’m sorry.”

XXIV | “For what?” Zayne pushed for more.

XXV | Her eye actually twitched at that. “For- knocking into you. And being… unprofessional.”

XXVI | “There we go,” Zayne said, in a mocking tone as if he was speaking to a child. “Now go back to your desk and do your actual job instead of treating this hospital like a playground.”

XXVII | At that, she fled. And just like that, I was left alone with him.

XXVIII | Zayne looked at me. And the ice in his face shifted, melted. The voice I adored so much lowered. “Are you alright?”

XXIX | I turned and ran. Bolted down the hall, because at that question, with that tone- coming from him - something in me had snapped loose. I couldn’t let him see it, the tears, the pain, the way his concern gutted me wide open - the shame. All kinds of things raced through my mind, but there was one dominant thought- He had heard what she said.

XXX | I flung the stairwell door open and collapsed on the cold steps, pressing my palms to my face. I didn’t want him to follow, but I knew he would.

I felt it the door open. That sudden shift of air pressure. The soft click of a handle that carried more weight than any shout ever could. His footsteps were not rushed, they were decisive. Heavy with something that made my breath catch.

I didn’t lift my head. I couldn’t. I stayed seated on the second step from the bottom, but wrapped my arms around my knees like that could hold me together.

“I didn’t mean to scare you,” Zayne said. His voice was low again, no ice.

I shook my head, to disagree and because I didn’t know what to say. Because my throat was too tight to let anything out. He thought I ran away because he scared me?

He didn’t sit next to me, not at first. He stayed a few steps above me, towering, but at a respectful distance. Like he knew I was splintering and didn’t want to push.

“This isn’t the first time, is it?” Zayne asked. “The way she treated you. The way she talked. She's probably not the only one either, is she?"

My lips parted, but nothing came out.

“It’s been going on for a while,” Zayne answered his own question. “And I did not see it."

I finally looked up at him. My vision was blurry, lashes wet, and cheeks flushed from the pressure in my chest. “It’s not your fault.”

Zayne flinched. Literally. Like I had hit him.

"You didn’t know,” I whispered. “How could you? You’re not… you’re not supposed to know everything happening in every hallway.”

“But I should’ve seen you,” he said. “You pulled away. You barely even looked at me the last few weeks. I noticed, and I still didn’t-”

“Because I had to,” I interrupted. My voice cracked. “Do you know what they were saying about me, Doctor Zayne?”

He didn’t answer, because he couldn't.

“They said that I was throwing myself at you. That I didn’t deserve to be here, that I was just some pathetic little nurse with a crush who thought smiling at a doctor meant I had a future.”

I saw the way his face twisted, something between rage and heartbreak. It hurt to see that expression on his face, it made me want to scream.

“So, I kept my distance, I stopped speaking unless I had to. I became so fucking small just so I had no way of giving them something to talk about anymore.” I said, my voice breaking.

“They don’t get to talk about you like that,” Zayne said, after a moment silence. “They don’t get to decide your worth. And I don’t give a damn if you were smiling at me or the walls. You earned your place in this department. Every day.".

My eyes welled up again. “You really didn’t know?”

“No,” he said, firmly. “And I hate myself for that. I saw something was off with you but I thought something might've happend in private and I did not want to intrude- I still should’ve asked. I just wanted to give you space- time- to come back to yourself again-"

Zayne took a step closer, slow not pushing. "I sincerely apologize, I can't take back what happened to you but I can make sure that you'll never have to experience anything like this ever again."

AND THEY LIVED A HAPPILY EVER AFTER. Yo, I am no good in romantic scenes, I can't help but cringe at every sentence- angst is my speciality- BUT I tried my best okay. 😗🙂‍↕️ I finished this while listening to gummy bear and ppap to keep myself awake lmao.

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[wileys-russo]

my mummy II l.williamson

part of the milaverse my mummy II l.williamson

"okay which one bubba? red or black?" you questioned, holding up the tiny arsenal jerseys and doing a little shimmy making your daughter giggle.

her tiny hand stroking her chin thoughtfully made you shake your head with an amused smile as she mulled over her options.

"black." mila eventually decided, finger pointing to the jersey in question, leahs number and williamson sprawled on the back.

"good pick babe. arms up please!" you instructed, quirking an eyebrow when the four year old shook her head in response. "i wanna dress myself today please mumma." she informed crossing her arms over her chest with a determined nod.

“mila are you-“ “im nearly five now, a big girl. i can do it.”

"very true i’m sorry. but its cold and its windy today, so dress warm please!" you warned, moving to sit down on the edge of her bed. "no mumma, by myself!" the four year old pointed to the door and hurried over, pushing impatiently at your legs.

"okay okay! jesus i thought i'd get a few more years before i got kicked out of your room, this hurts mila." you gasped dramatically as she shoved you from her room, only met with a door slammed in your face.

"was that-" you turned around and nodded to your wife. "she wants to dress herself today." you informed with a chuckle, moving into the blondes waiting arms which wrapped around you.

"we've told her she isn't allowed to grow up right?" "nearly every day since was born my love, she just does not want to listen."

~

"-are you done now?" you called out with a sigh, leaning against the wall by your daughters door which you'd tried to open several times. only met with a shout and it pushed closed again, mila firmly stating she wasn't ready and you weren't allowed to see until she was.

leah had already left as to not be late and you shook your head as you checked the time again already knowing the two of you would be stuck in traffic and miss kick off if you didn't leave soon.

you'd decided to give the goalpost a kiss in training and were on concussion watch, the knock was nothing serious enough to warrant medical treatment but it was enough to mean you'd be watching todays match from the stands.

"okay mila my love. we have to go and i'm coming in!" you warned, though before you could even grab the handle the door it flew open and a bundle of colour and blonde hair came zooming out.

"like it?" your daughter beamed, bouncing happily on the balls of her feet as you bit your bottom lip taking in her choice of outfit, trying really hard not to bust out in laughter.

she had on a pair of light up trainers alessia had gotten her for her birthday, pale yellow nike joggers with a pair of lime green bike shorts over the top.

on her top half she had on a red hoodie with a pink wälti jersey over the top and a white arsenal beanie on her head, with its matching scarf tied around her hips like a makeshift belt.

"well...i'm not going to lose you in the crowd, thats for certain." you admitted, knowing no matter what you said or tried there wasn't a chance you'd be getting your daughter changed without a fight.

"you don't wanna wear mummys jersey?" you tried, knowing your wife would kick off and lia would be absolutely beside herself with glee in your daughters current choice.

"nope! aunty wally was sad last time i saw her so i thought this would make her happy, cause you and mummy always say pink is a happy colour!" mila explained and your heart melted.

the last time she had seen lia was after a particularly rowdy team night out where she'd wound up crashing at your place, you the designated driver and your wife a key influence in just how many shots lia had downed which you'd told her off for afterwards.

the two had wound up crying crocodile tears on the living room floor as you disallowed them to see mila when the three of you returned home and swapped over with the babysitter around 11 at night.

trying to remind them it was hours after mila's bedtime and the two of them were very drunk it was like arguing with two overgrown toddlers.

which had in turn had woken your daughter up who'd come to investigate, not understanding why she wasn't allowed to say hello when you tried to usher her quickly back to bed before either of the lw's sobbing in the living room could get their hands on her.

"we do say that don't we." you agreed with your daughters words, shaking your head in amusement at her outfit but giving in, not wanting to fully squash the independence you and leah were trying to instill in her.

"at least you listened about the weather and did lots of layers bubba."

~

you sent polite smiles to the strange looks you received walking your daughter through the tunnels of the emirates, meeting up with leahs mum and wordlessly shaking your head at her questioning stare as she scooped up her granddaughter and the three of you made your way to your seats.

"do you like my outfit nana?" your daughter chirped for the third time in the hour as you waved to your wife who was very clearly looking around stressed that she'd not spotted you yet, sighing in relief once she had.

"don't ask." you mouthed at her perplexed look toward your daughter stood up in your lap furiously waving her and her team mates down. "wally!" you cupped your hands over your mouth to gain the midfielders attention as she began to walk off the pitch after warm ups.

vic heard you and grinned before tapping lia's shoulder and gesturing toward you as you spun mila around to show her last name plastered on your daughters back. her face lit up and you laughed as she raced right over to almost tackle your wife, no doubt about to lay into her about it.

now mila was older she'd become a different sort of handful to take to games, especially when both you and leah were playing and had to trust her in someone elses care.

normally your poor mother in law who insisted leah was much worse at that age, which never failed to rile the blonde up who argued her brother was the handful and she was the golden child.

gone were the earmuffs, dummy and baby blanket mila had needed to settle previously, where she'd often sleep the whole way through the match happily bundled up in someones arms.

but nowadays she was a little unstoppable bundle of energy who often required distraction or bribery of some sort to sit still for prolonged periods of time.

which is how you found yourself racing off midway through the first half to sort out some food, having left in such a rush you'd completely forgotten the bag of snacks and toys you normally carted along with you whenever you left the house with mila in tow.

much like her other mother your daughter had the stomach of a bottomless pit, though gratefully she'd taken after you with what she was happy to put in that pit and was nowhere near as fussy as leah.

sometimes when you made dinner and mila ate what you did but leah required a separate meal you really questioned who was the four year old between them.

thankfully once she'd been fed and watered mila settled a little. with her nana more than happy to listen to her chatter and answer her millions of questions you made it through the entire match without a single issue.

the problems started when the game finished, mila starting to go on the turn when you wouldn't allow her to run down the stairs toward the barriers to see leah or any of her aunties, far too many people around and worried you'd lose her or she'd be crushed in the crowd.

it would seem though that patience was not on your daughters agenda today.

"i wanna see mummy now!" the girl whined, wriggling furiously to try and yank her hand out of your grip as you sighed and took a deep breath.

"mummys just saying hi to some people first bubba, thats part of our job! remember?" you tried to explain, even offering her an ice cream as a last minute ditch to distract her but it was to no use.

not even alessia could capture her attention for more than a few minutes as your daughter grew more and more fussy and inpatient the more time passed.

"it'll be fine." you forced a smile toward your friends and team mates who'd all taken turns trying to distract mila as the two of you stood in the tunnel now, leah signing autographs and taking photos with a larger crowd than normal.

"wanna come kick a ball tiny?" beth offered in a last ditch effort and that seemed to work as your daughter nodded eagerly and latched onto the taller girls leg, her giggles echoing around as beth zoomed off back onto the pitch.

you kept them in clear sight as you hung on the sidelines now, waving to a few fans who called out your name, sending an apologetic shake of your head when they asked for your signature and photos too, your focus needing to on your daughter today.

but that tiny lapse in attention was all it took for mila to break away from beth, sprinting off toward leah who had her back turned and ignoring the older girls calls after her which gained your focus back right away.

intercepting her quickly you scooped the four year old up into your arms and sat her on your hip. "i wanna see mummy!” you winced as she smacked your chest a few times and pushed away alessia who'd appeared to try and help, and you could tell from the wobble of her bottom lip that she was a few moments away from a total meltdown.

"hey mila, baby look at me please." you dropped to your knees and stood her on her feet, your hands on her shoulders stopping her from running off.

"we don't hit people, okay? i know you're having some really big feelings and you miss mummy but-" you started, yelping as your daughter suddenly clawed at your hand, racing away toward leah.

you shouted after her, leah looking up a second too late as her daughter barreled into her. "my mummy! mine!" she snarled at a young girl who leah was trying to take a picture with.

the defender quickly picking her up and apologizing to the fan and her dad right as mila started to have a meltdown.

apologizing to the crown still awaiting her attention leah turned heel and headed toward you, the two of you falling into step as you made your way into the tunnel and down the hall toward the change rooms.

"bubba-" you started as her screams turned into sobs and she buried her face in leahs neck who winced with one final scream sounding in her ear.

"off!" mila demanded, pushing away your hand which tried to rub at her back as you inhaled sharply and paused.

catching your wifes eye who nodded in understanding, you stayed outside and she disapeared into the change rooms to try and calm your daughter down.

"hey, you alright?" you glanced up to meet concerned blue eyes and nodded, exhaling deeply as your best friend pulled you into a hug. "thanks less." you mumbled as she rubbed your back, assuring over and over that you were the best mum ever.

promising her you were okay but that you'd need a rain check on dinner plans you all had tonight she gave you another hug and headed off to see her family.

with another deep breath you headed into the change rooms, only a few of the girls remaining as you spotted leah by her cubby. you caught her eye again and raised an eyebrow as she nodded, your daughter still tightly clinging onto her.

"mila. what do we need to say to mumma please?" leah started firmly, bouncing her knee up and down gently to gain your daughters attention as she pulled her head out of your wifes neck.

"im very sorry for scratching and yelling." the girl apologised softly, climbing off leahs lap and moving into yours, warmth flooding your body as she hugged you tightly and you kissed the top of her head.

you melted even further as your daughter grabbed your hand, carefully kissing over where she'd scratched you before clambering right back into leahs lap.

"i'll shower at home." leah chuckled, gesturing to the way your daughter clung onto her like a monkey, refusing to loosen her grip as you took your wifes bag for her and the three of you waved goodbye to the few girls left and headed for the car park.

"mummy sit in the back with me, please?" mila ordered with a pout once you reached the car.

"alright kid, just this once." leah gave in clearly picking up that mila was being abnormally clingy today, something the two of you would need to speak with her about another time.

and for the rest of that night it was the same story, your daughter refusing not to have some part of her in contact with leah at all times.

so much so that she'd stayed in the bathroom while your wife showered, insisting you sit with her as well as she held leahs hand through the shower door as much as she could making you smile in amusement.

"my mummy." was all that seemed to be repeated, the possessiveness also something new but a conversation for another day as leah waved off your concerns, too thrilled with having your daughters full focus and attention all night.

"for god sakes." you'd mumbled later that night at the sight before you. your wife having spent an abnormal amount of time putting mila to bed you'd wandered up to check in.

only to find leah dead asleep in the tiny single bed belonging to your daughter, long limbs hanging off the sides with mila curled into her still very much so awake.

"sh! mummy is very tired." the four year old warned with her finger over her lips as you entered the room.

"you should be asleep little miss, not mummy!" you reminded quietly as she gave you a cheeky smile looking far too much like leah, holding up the book which was previously laid open on your wifes chest and patting the mere centimeters of space left on her bed beside her.

"one more story, please?"

[grandline-fics]

I'm so in love with your writing, I'd love to see the "one bed trope" from you! Maybe a little suggestive, as far as you're comfortable, of course.

DESCRIPTION: There was only one bed

WARNINGS:  nothing too suggestive, more on the fluff side

CHARACTERS: Mihawk, Shanks

WORDS: 2,065

A/N: Thank you so much for this request. I didn't know which characters you wanted so used the most popular form the recent poll. I had intended to do Ace as well but only had the energy to get something done for Shanks and Mihawk. I love this trope so much that i'll probably do more parts in the future. I hope you're happy with what I came up with and I'm sorry I didn't make it suggestive.

*REQUESTS ARE OPEN*

DIRECTORY | PROMPT LIST

———————

MIHAWK

You were going to kill Crocodile. Not only did he order you to the tiniest island you’d seen in a long while, were the only thing in abundance seemed to be gloomy expressions but he also insisted you go to ‘keep an eye on' Mihawk. Since you considered Crocodile your main superior-a perspective you hadn't dropped since your Baroque Works days- you couldn't exactly refuse the assignment but it just made zero sense for you to be here. For starters Mihawk worked alone and efficiently enough that he didn’t require anyone to look out for him. Plus ‘observation’ wasn’t your usual role in Cross Guild. Normally Crocodile handed you a bounty list, told you to pick one and go get them. 

This was just one big headache and to make matters worse after scouring the entire island a call came through from Crocodile saying the bounty had already been completed and just handed in. Now you really were going to kill your boss, but from the look on Mihawk’s face it seemed you would have to get in line. From the receiver, Crocodile’s laugh caught both of your attentions.  “Look these things happen so stop pouting. Just make your way back to Cross Guild.”

Mihawk didn’t offer a response and ended the call, walking out of the alley you’d both stopped at to take the call. Silently you fell into step beside the former Warlord, walking the streets of the island for what felt like the hundredth time already. You let out a sigh of relief to see the inn come into view, now the only thing on your mind was trying to get a good night’s sleep and calm your annoyance at the whole situation. You couldn’t even muster a polite smile to the receptionist at the desk. “Two please.”

“Oh.” The receptionist glanced between you and Mihawk, her expression trained with years of experience to appear calm but you both saw the flicker of nervousness in her eyes for the smallest moment. “I’m sorry but we’re booked almost to capacity.”

“You’re joking.” You muttered. Why was everything going against you today? “You have nothing left?”

“W-well we’re a small island. Rooms go fast but we do have one room available.” You and Mihawk exchanged a look, both composed. Then the receptionist had to uselessly add. “Only one bed…” With a sigh you held out your hand for the key, knowing there wasn't much choice. Muttering thanks you glanced at the number of the keyring and headed for your room for the night. Stepping inside you found it lived up to your very low expectations but at least it was clean. Silently you eyed the bed you would have to share and looked to your stoic roommate. “So which side of the bed do you want?” 

As expected Mihawk was mature and respectable about the whole thing. Calm as ever he chose his side-the one closest to the door- and settled in for the night. Mihawk’s ability to fall over to sleep at ease was enviable because in the dark you could hear his deep, even breaths as he slept facing away from you. As tired as you were and as comfortable as you normally did feel in Mihawk’s presence you just couldn’t fall asleep. While the bed you lay in wasn't the worst you’d ever had to sleep in, it wasn’t the comfiest and living at Cross Guild had practically spoiled you. You’d gotten so used to stretching out, something you couldn’t exactly do at this moment. 

Deciding to just make do with your half of the bed and not disturb Mihawk, you rolled onto your side with the intention of getting comfortable. The only problem was you’d vastly overestimated the room you had to move and could only gasp as you felt the bed disappear from under you. In a split second as you braced to hit the ground, you were instead caught by a pair of hands. With ease you were pulled back onto the bed and you tensed to feel your back make contact with the warmth of Mhawk’s chest. “Sorry for waking you.”

“It’s fine, just sleep.” He told you while pulling one arm back to tuck his hand under his pillow. You tried not to react to how sleep brought Mihawk’s voice to a lower register that made it so much more attractive to you. You only nodded at his instruction and shifted slightly, already so much more comfortable than you had been all night. The only thing now was you noticed Mihawk still had one arm loosely draped over your body, not quite holding you but still enveloping you in his touch. “This is only to keep you from falling out of the bed again.”

“I didn’t say anything…” You mused, lips curving into a teasing smile that Mihawk could practically hear in the dark. “If you wanted to cuddle all you had to do was ask.”

“Don’t make me kick you out of this bed.” Mihawk warned in your ear, despite the threat you smirked to feel his arm over you tighten just a little. 

“Relax, your secret is safe with me.” Ordinarily you would have teased him a little more but between the tiredness finally winning over you and the warmth of his body against yours being so comforting. For a moment Mihawk wondered if you were genuinely comfortable against him, ready to release you at the first sign of unease. Yet you surprised him when you yawned and lazily placed your hand over his arm and smile in satisfaction as your eyes slid closed, your breathing evening out as you fell asleep.

Mihawk had been taking his time to slowly get to know you and let you in little by little, but now watching you roll onto your other side and curl up against his chest he began to reconsider his actions. Perhaps a few more missions away from Cross Guild’s base wouldn’t be such a bad thing after all.

SHANKS

This type of situation should not be happening in this day and age. Not with your crew and Captain having the reputation and fame they had. Drawing names to see who was sharing rooms of all things reminded you of when the crew was only just forming and the coin to pay for individual rooms was a luxury. Some of the others on the crew shared your slight annoyance but you all knew that there wasn’t much you could do about it. The ship needed repairs after getting damaged in a ferocious storm with the sleeping quarters affected and unusable for now. You were all pirates after all and you supposed you needed to be reminded of that. 

Still though you were secretly hoping you were one of the lucky ones who got their own room. You mentally cursed when Ben pulled out a slip of paper and read your name out. Resigned to your fate you grabbed your drink and took a plentiful mouthful as the vice-captain grabbed another piece of paper to announce your roommate for the night. As you wiped the stray remnant of the liquid from your lip you spotted the man pause and fight a laugh, disguising his amusement by rubbing the lower half of his face. “Captain Shanks.” 

Your back went rigid and you ignored the burning stares of the rest of the crew as you instead turned your attention to the man in question. Even he seemed momentarily thrown by the announcement but he recovered swiftly as expected of the laidback man. His dark eyes met your gaze and he offered you a cheeky smile and a wink.

That night when all the drinking had been done you and Shanks stepped into your shared room. Without needed to consult on anything you both instinctively went to your preferred side of the bed to sleep on. You sat down and worked on kicking off your shoes and shrugging out of your coat to at least be a little comfier. You looked over your shoulder when Shanks lightly cleared his throat as he pulled back the cover to settle down on the mattress. “Problem Cap?”

“Not really.” Shanks mused with a sly smile. “I usually sleep naked is all.”

“Poor baby, I’m sure you can be brave and at least keep your trousers on for one night.” You teased, used to your Captain’s antics and knowing he was only making jokes to ease the slight tension at having to share like this. With a tired groan you settled down on your side of the bed as Shanks flicked off the light, bringing the room fully into darkness. “If not the barmaid should still be about to help you.”

“And downgrade my sleeping partner? I’d rather lose another limb.” Shanks told you dramatically, offended you’d suggest such a thing. You let out a huff of amusement and rolled your eyes as you stared tiredly at the ceiling, letting yourself grow more comfortable against the mattress. “I lost count how many of the crew wanted me to swap with them…”

“Uh-huh.“ You mused with a lazy smile before breaking out into a long yawn, sleep coming over you quickly now. “Well aren’t you lucky? Now go to sleep, ‘kay?”

“Can I at least get a good night kiss?” Shanks teased lightly, playfully tapping your nose and grinning in the darkened room to see your tired face scrunch up slightly. He’d said it as a joke, something for you to barely register in your mind as you drifted off to sleep. What he hadn’t expected though was you to roll onto your side and push yourself up with a low hum of sleepiness, not even bothering to open your eyes fully. 

He watched silently, completely overcome with curiosity as your hand reached out to skim your fingers against his face, searching for him in the dark. Your hand settled against his cheek and slowly you drew closer. With half-lidded eyes Shanks couldn’t take his gaze off of your slightly parted lips. 

“Shanks…” your voice was barely a breathy whisper but it was clear as a bell to Shanks, his attention raptly on you and only you. Quickly you pulled back just enough and opened your eyes to smirk slightly to see Shanks had leant in slightly to chase your lips he had been quietly eager to taste.

“You’re killing me here, love.” Shanks protested with a small pout, his hand dropping to the small of your back, fingers flexing slightly a gesture, to request you close the distance. He wasn’t forcing you, you had all the power here. You tilted your head and smiled at the sudden pet-name. You couldn’t deny the temptation to give in to your own idle curiosities about your handsome Captain. Given how you were sharing a bed and he'd requested a kiss you would have been foolish to throw away the opportunity you had. Still you had to at least get a little bit more fun out of it by keeping Shanks in momentary suspense. 

Finally you relented and kissed Shanks, your lips moving languidly against his; it being no surprise to you the he was already returning the action with no hesitancy. There was no fight for dominance in the kiss you shared but you could feel the power and command of Shanks’ presence over you but he left the pace, duration, and intensity entirely up to you. As much as you wanted to take it further, to push your curiosity and attraction towards the man against you for your own satisfaction you had to pull away reluctantly, knowing you wouldn’t have been able to enjoy what would follow fully with how tired you were. “Satisfied with your good night kiss, Captain?”

“You have no idea.” Shanks grinned pressing a quick kiss against your head as you settled down on the bed again. “I can now sleep peacefully and dream the sweetest dreams.”

“Good.” You grinned sleepily, opening your eyes just enough to fix him a playful smile. “I expect a good morning kiss in return by the way.”

“You’ve got yourself a deal, love.” Shanks grinned at you, already counting down the hours until he got to feel his lips against yours again but for now he would enjoy the time he had to sleep beside you.

——————————————-

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[leashybebes]

Hi! Love your work so much! I have a very vague prompt and it’s just Tommy being emotionally vulnerable with Buck. Idc what about I just need this man in tears please and thanks.

well this got longer than intended! i've skimmed over it but basically banged it out in fifteen minutes bc turns out i also need this man in tears

When the bubble pops six weeks after Tommy walked out of the loft, it's not at all what Buck was expecting. He'd hoped for an 'I'm sorry', an 'I was wrong', an 'I want you back'. In bitter moments, he'd even hoped for Tommy to say something really dickish so Buck could just hate him and get on with his life. Hell, even a random string of letters that Buck could interpret as an accident or an attempt to open the lines of communication depending on his mood.

What he gets is:

I've been going to therapy

Finally, right?

I hate it

And then radio silence for the better part of an hour. Buck is about to tear his hair out. He drafts and doesn't send half a dozen responses. The loft smells of chocolate cake by the time the next message comes through.

Sorry, call.

Tell me to get lost, it's fine. But I was wondering if we could talk. I owe you an explanation.

Buck reads it twice, takes the cake out of the oven to cool. Scrolls back up to read the messages from the start. Later, once the cake is filled with sharp redcurrant jelly and covered in a perhaps overly generous layer of toffee buttercream, he picks up his phone again.

I owe you an explanation is glaring at him.

Yeah you do, he sends back. Come over when your shift is done.

The reply is almost instant:

Thank you. 2 hrs.

Two hours suddenly feels like both not enough time to prepare, and far too much time to tie himself up in knots. He deep cleans the kitchen, makes a shopping list, checks in with Maddie. He doesn't mention that he's going to see Tommy.

Somehow, two hours pass in the blink of an eye and Buck realizes - he has no idea what he's going to say. He's spent the last month and a half trying with everything in him not to call Tommy, and he's just now realizing he has no idea what he would have said if he'd given into the urge. Maybe he just wanted to hear the guy's voice, and now he's about to, and he has no idea what to do with himself.

The knock at the door makes him jolt, and that's it, there's no more time to think. His first thought when he opens the door is that it's not fair that Tommy looks so good. He has no business looking so good. His hair is freshly trimmed, those greys at his temple that admittedly send Buck a little feral sparkling in the low light of the hall, his favorite blue Henley soft and stretched across the bulk of his chest, his eyes - Buck's whole train of thought derails because he looks again and Tommy looks - scared. Sad. Like he's holding back from flinching by the skin of his teeth.

"Hey, Tommy."

"Hi, Evan."

Evan, he notes. Steps back. Waves Tommy inside. Tries not to notice the way Tommy's face crumples a little as he steps over the threshold.

"Never thought I'd be here again," he says.

"Me either," Buck admits. "Well, after the first couple weeks when I - " When I sat around and waited for you to come back and tell me you made a mistake. He bites his tongue. Much as he wants to be real bitchy about this, Tommy looks like he is on the edge, and nothing in Buck wants to make that worse.

"You want a coffee?"

"Uh. Sure," Tommy says, and it gives Buck the opportunity to turn his back, to breathe. He's achingly aware of Tommy behind him, of the gravity of his presence, the sound of his breathing (a little shaky), the slight creak as he takes a seat. Buck still has the stupid almond milk and the stupid syrup Tommy likes in his stupid candy flavored coffee, has been buying the former on reflex and can't bring himself to use the latter and taste Tommy's kisses without the man himself. He makes the coffee, even cuts Tommy a slice of cake, and dumps them both in front of him.

Tommy blinks down at the cake, up at Buck. "You made that?"

"Yeah," Buck says. "Been getting real into baking since - well, since."

"Oh." Tommy chews on his lip, looks away again.

"Every time I wanna call you, I bake," Buck admits, the words falling into the silence between them with more weight than they deserve given how ridiculous they are, really.

Tommy glances up at him. "Yeah?"

Buck swivels, pulls open the door to his fridge which is still groaning under the weight of saran wrapped loaves and cakes and tupperwares full of cookies.

"That's - that's a lot."

Buck shrugs. "Yeah, well."

The silence is painful. Awkward in a way they've never really been with each other. Buck throws himself down onto the stool opposite Tommy, tries not to think about how this is exactly where they were sitting when - when. From the look on his face, the way Tommy can't meet his eyes, he's thinking the exact same thing. This is - it's the worst, Buck thinks miserably.

"So, therapy, huh?" he blurts out.

Tommy nods, takes a deep breath. "After I left that night, I - I drove to the movie theater."

Buck blinks. That is…not what he was expecting. "Uh…"

"Bought a ticket and everything. Realized on my way in that that's - that's not normal. Nothing I did that night was normal. You - you made me so happy, and I blew that up the second it sounded like maybe you wanted something long-term. That - that's not normal. The way I think about - about relationships, about love, about myself. It's not normal."

Buck feels like he's holding his breath.

"So I went home. Drank a couple of beers. Psyched myself up. Booked an appointment for the next day."

"That's…" Buck doesn't know what to say. "That's quick."

"Yeah. I don't - " Tommy looks away. Buck can't see it, but he can tell that he's bouncing his leg anxiously. "I wanna stop being a fucking - a wrecking ball. I wanna stop hurting people, stop hurting myself, but it feels like it's all I do."

Buck can't bite his tongue quick enough. "You make choices, Tommy."

Tommy nods and shrinks in on himself. "I know that. I do. It doesn't feel like it, but I do. I get scared and I make the worse choice every time because it's easier than being brave, and I tell myself it's the only choice but - it's not. I know that. I do know that. I'm - I'm so fucked up, Evan."

His eyes are swimming with tears and Buck knows he's no better. Everything in him is screaming at him to reach out, but he clenches his hands together under the table to stop himself. This is - this is maybe the most real Tommy's ever been with him, maybe the most real he's seen Tommy be with himself, and Buck doesn't want to interrupt it, even as every part of him wants to gather Tommy up to him and soothe him and promise him everything's okay. Everything's so far from okay. He watches Tommy take a few deep breaths, recognises the pattern and the count from his own therapy sessions.

"My - my dad - you know, he's an asshole. But he wasn't always. He and my mom - they were so in love. I mean, stars in their eyes, to the exclusion of everything and everyone else, they adored each other. Even before she died, I didn't - there wasn't space for me in there. And after - I guess I remind him of what he lost. They loved each other, and it hurt me. Abby loved me, and I hurt her. I loved N - Nick, and he h - hurt me. I - "

Tommy clears his throat wetly and looks away while Buck thinks who the fuck is Nick and how do I break his kneecaps?

"You what, Tommy?" he asks instead, and it comes out gently.

"I love you," Tommy says, and Buck pretends he isn't paying attention to the tense, pretends his heart isn't rabbiting inside his chest. "I love you, and I hurt us both and I'm - I'm poison, Evan, I'm nothing but sharp edges but I swear I'm trying not to be and I know it's too late but I'm so - I'm so sorry, I'm so - "

He's fully crying now, trying to hide his face in his hands and Buck can't hold back anymore, closes the space between them and gets his arms around the bulk of Tommy's shoulders where they're shaking.

"Don't," Tommy begs, his whole body tightening, so tense Buck's worried something is going to snap. "Don't - d - don't - I don't deserve - "

"Shh," Buck says, pressing his face into Tommy's hair and stopping himself from making it a kiss at the last second. "I don't care what you think you deserve, just let me hold you, okay? Just let me."

Tommy cries harder, soaking Buck's shirt, and Buck doesn't know how long it goes on for but suddenly Tommy's holding him too, clinging in a way he never has before, in a way that feels desperate and fierce and heartbroken.

"It's okay," Buck promises in spite of himself. He strokes his fingers over the short cropped hairs on the nape of Tommy's neck. "I've got you, it's okay. Just try to breathe, baby, you're gonna make yourself sick."

Baby slips out without any intention on his part, but Tommy doesn't seem to notice, just heaves in a hitching, gulping breath, then another, and another. He shifts in Buck's arms, pulling away and Buck lets him. He doesn't retreat to his own seat though, doesn't feel right to put any distance between them while Tommy presses the heels of his hands into his eyes like he can force the tears back inside.

"I'm sorry," he says, when he's a little calmer. "I've got no right - "

"Stop, okay. Just - stop being so horrible to yourself."

Tommy nods. "Yeah. Working on that. I know - I know it's too late, and I swear I didn't come here with the intention of - of crying all over you and making you feel bad for me. I just - I wanted you to know that I'm sorry, and I know that I fucked up real bad. I know - like I said, I know it's too little, too late, but I want you to know I'm working on - on being better."

Buck chews on the inside of his lip clearly for a second too long because Tommy gives a sharp little nod.

"That's all I wanted to say," he says, pushing back from the table and starting to stand. "I'll get out of your - "

"Sit your ass down," Buck says, a little rougher than he intended. Tommy does as he's told, blinking rapidly and Buck pushes away from the table, paces across the kitchen and back again.

"Evan…"

"Shut up. If you keep making decisions for me, I'm gonna - I'm gonna start throwing loaves at your head."

Tommy makes a noise that's half laugh, half sob, and Buck fights back the tiny grin that's tugging at his mouth.

"You - you really think you're this irredeemable asshole that doesn't deserve to be happy, don't you?"

Tommy shrugs, looks away. "If the shoe fits…"

Buck whirls around, yanks open the fridge, grabs the first loaf he sees. "This is coffee and walnut. It's dense. Last warning, jackass."

Tommy's laugh is more distinct this time. "Evan. Okay. Yes, I think that. But I'm - I'm working on not."

"Okay. Okay. So - so work on it." He puts the loaf down. "Work on it, and take me on a date."

Tommy looks like he's being rebooted without warning. "You can't be serious."

"Why not?"

"I - "

"Tell me why I can't be serious."

"Because! Because I'm - I'm a mess. I hurt you. I left."

"You came back," Buck counters. "Even if it was only to apologize."

"You deserve better."

"I want you."

"I don't - I don't know when I'll be - better than I am."

"You're better today than the day you left. You're here."

"Evan…"

"Yes or no, Tommy. Take me on a date."

"I - "

"Yes or no."

"Yes. Please, yes."

Buck exhales for what feels like the first time in weeks. "Okay. Okay. That's a start."

He puts the loaf back in the fridge, takes Tommy's coffee away to reheat it, and the whole time he can feel Tommy's eyes on him, watching him like he's something precious.

[mountainsandmayhem]

Shhh...Just A Little Bit More

DBF!Joel x Fem!Reader

18+ MDNI

Masterlist || Part Two || Part Three (Soft Version) || Part Three (Spicy Version)

Summary: Joel catches you somewhere you shouldn't be, twice. CW: all p no plot! age gap, spanking, dirty talk, parental guilt, brat and brat tamer, sub/dom dynamics, edging and degradation kinks if you squint AN: I found the bottom right photo on Pinterest and @mermaidgirl30 said it screamed DBF!Joel. I have never written for DBF before so please be kind. Dividers by @saradika-graphics - thank you for all your amazing graphics and dividers, I'd be lost without your page.

“Let go of me, you fucking psycho!” You’re practically yelling over the music of the club, wrenching your arm from Joel’s strong grasp. The security guard approaches and Joel shoots him a glare so dark that he holds his hands up and steps back. “What the fuck, Joel?”

“What are ya doin’ here, sweetheart” he demands, one eyebrow raised. 

“I’m working!” You stomp your foot and then get right up in his face, pointing a finger at him. Joel Miller, your dad’s best friend, hanging out in a strip club one town over. “The real question is, what are YOU doin here?” 

You’re only a bottle girl, you don’t get on the stage and have no intentions of stripping. It’s good money, great money actually. At 22 you’re already well on your way to having a down payment on a condo, it’s just too bad you’re having to lie to your parents. 

“With my crew, they picked the place. I’m takin’ you home. Go get your coat.” He crosses his arms over his chest, staring at you sternly. The music is pounding in your ears, the air thick with smoke. Even in the dimly lit hallway you can see the way Joel’s eyes rake over your body, taking in the very tiny Jean shorts and bralette you’re wearing. 

“I’m not going anywhere with you,” you spin and flip him the bird as you walk away. You know he’s staring so you give a little extra wiggle of your ass as you walk away. Joel Miller, staring at your ass. The fourteen year old inside you does a happy dance - that version of yourself had a tiny crush on him. Too bad he’s a stuffy, grumpy asshole now. You miss the fun, young Joel. He used to do cannonballs in the pool with you and his daughter Sarah. She was a few years older than you, but he was much more fun than your father. But now? Now he’s a certified prick. Thinking he can drag you away like some sort of barbaric caveman. He’s not your dad, even if he was, you’re an adult. 

When you finish your shift you head outside and pull up your Uber app, men often want to do shots with you so even though you never get drunk at work you also don’t drive there. 

See, Joel. I’m responsible. 

“Let’s go,” his voice is deep, still angry with you. You didn’t see him waiting by the door so you jump. 

“Jesus. You fucking scared me.” 

“Watch your language. Get in the truck.” 

You grumble under your breath that he should kiss your ass as he holds the door open for you. He stalks around to his side of the truck while furrowing his brow and shaking his head. 

“Got somethin’ to say young lady?” 

“Ya,” you say, slumping in the seat and putting your white vans on his dashboard, “kiss my ass.” 

He presses his lips in a thin line, you can see him eyeing your long toned legs from your peripheral vision before the engine roars to life and he speeds off down the gravel highway. 

When you pull up to the house he hops out of the truck and is right on your heels as you open the door. 

“I’m fine, Mister Miller.” You say with a sneer. You know he hates that, he has told everyone he’s ever been introduced to to call him Joel. 

Joel steps into your parents house and calls your dad’s name. “What the fuck! Joel! Shut up!” 

He calls for him again and your dad comes stumbling from his room, tying his robe around his sleeping attire. “Joel? What’s going on?” He flicks on the light, squinting against the brightness. “It’s 3 in the morning.” 

“Just thought I’d let you now know that the guys at work wanted to go to The Skin tonight. Caught your daughter working there.” 

“Are you fucking kidding me, Joel?!” You yell, pushing at his broad chest. Your dad stands there stunned. Eyes wide and mouth agape. He thought you were working as a nurses aide overnight at the hospital on weekends. He’s even seen you leave the house in scrubs. All a part of the web of lies you have weaved. 

“Don’t speak to Joel that way,” your dad snaps. “Go to your room young lady. We’ll talk about this later.” 

“Kiss my ass, cowboy.” You practically spit at him as you stomp to your room. As you round the corner your mom is standing in the hallway clutching her crucifix necklace. You have a sudden urge to hiss at her with the way she’s looking at you, like you’re a disappointment. A sinner, the worst kind of person in her eyes. 

The next morning was the fight of all fights with your parents. Your dad tried to ground you, your mom started shoving church pamphlets at you. They wouldn’t even fucking listen. 

“IM NOT A STRIPPER,” you yelled at them over and over again. 

Finally, when the yelling ceased, your dad said in a very quiet anger, “young lady. I FORBID you from going there again. Is that clear? I don’t care if you’re 22 or 42, if you live under my roof, you live by my rules. You’re going to go to continue going to your university classes during the week, and on weekends you will be home. Studying. Helping your mother with the chores. You will go to bed at respectable hour. If you need money, you ask us. Is that clear?” 

You blink back tears and head to your room, slamming the door behind you. You are NOT quitting that job. 

When the next weekend rolls around you say goodnight to your parents at 10pm and head to your room. You worked it out with your boss to work the midnight to 4 am shift. So you wait - ear pressed to your door until you finally hear your parents go to bed. You sneak out the same way you’ve been sneaking out for years and run down the street with your newly embroidered denim shorts in hand to meet your Uber. 

You peel yourself away from the men and the booze around 2am to get some fresh air, exiting through the back to the dimly lit alley. You take a big inhale through your nose before you see it. The truck. Joel’s truck. And Joel. Leaning against the truck box, arms crossed, one foot up on the tire. 

You flip him off and then turn back towards the back entrance to the club. He’s on you so fast, grabbing the back of your bicep in his large hand. “You little brat. You aren’t supposed to be here.” 

“Read the shorts, MISTER Miller.” You say it as much venom as you can muster. 

His eyes rake down your body and you can almost feel them burning into you. It feels so good, you never want him to stop. Your pussy throbbed when he called you a brat and you wouldn’t be surprised if your light jean shorts hadn’t been soaked through already. When his eyes reach the pocket he sees ‘Kiss My Ass, Cowboy’ stitched in baby pink lettering and his grip tightens. 

He’s fucking furious with you. Furious that you’re here. Furious that other men get to see you dressed like this. Furious that he wants you so fucking badly. But mostly, furious because he knows you want him too and he’s a weak weak man when it comes to pretty little things like you. He yanks you back against his body and you let out a pained moan. 

“Don’t make me punish you,” he says coldly in your ear and you fight to stop your knees from buckling. 

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” you say breathlessly. 

Joel’s lips graze against the shell of your ear, hand gripping so tightly that you’re sure you’ll have bruises tomorrow. “So that’s what you want? You want me to punish you? Put you in your place? Huh?” 

You grind your ass back against him, “you would dare, Joel.” 

His other hand clamps down on your hip as he steers you to his truck, walking you around so no one can see the two of you. He opens the back door and pushes you forward until your legs are against the cold steel frame of the vehicle. “You don’t get to call me that. You call me Mr Miller from now on. Understood?” 

“Go fuck yourself, Joel,” you emphasize every vowel of his name, digging deeper. Pushing him. Pushing to see how far he’ll go. You get off on being a brat, and by the way his hard cock is pressing into your ass, he does too. 

He unbottons your shorts then lifts you slightly and pushes your upper body down onto the seat, the truck is high enough that your feet are dangling, ass stuck out for him. “Look at these slutty little shorts.” He tugs on the hem, your shorts now sitting just above your knees. Your pert ass is exposed to Joel and the night air. He tuts at the sight of you, “No panties. Little fuckin’ tease.” 

You whimper at his words, slick starting to coat your thighs. “You’re the one standing back there doing nothing.” You taunt. 

The cool night air spreads goosebumps across your skin, your clit twitches in anticipation of his touch. Other men have fucked you hard to get you to shut your mouth. And finally, FINALLY, you’re going to get fucked by Joel Miller. However, you grossly underestimated the different between the boys were with before and the man behind you now. 

His hand strikes your cheek hard and you let out a loud pained yell. “What the fuck, Joel!” 

“If you’re gonna be a brat,” his hand lands on your ass again, “you’re going to get a spanking.” His voice is harsh and rough as he hits you a third time. The sound of his skin on yours echoing through the cab of his truck. He hits you again, not caring about your cries of protest. 

You’ve never been spanked before and you’re thrown by your bodies reaction to it. At first you were shocked, then humiliated and then the pain and heat travelled to the base of your spine and you found yourself starting to get turned on. Arousal pools in your belly with each strike of his palm and when your pussy throbs the humiliation starts to creep back in. Are you supposed to be enjoying this so much, is this what Joel wants?

You bend your knees up, trying to make space between your bodies. One of his strong hands wraps around your ankles, pinning them to the back of your thighs as he spanks you again. 

“Stop! I’m sorry. I’ll - “ he strikes you again, harder than the last few times and there’s no more pain, every slap is full of pleasure. You let out a deep moan, your pussy practically gushing onto the leather seats. “Oh fuuuuck.”

Now that it’s turning you on it almost eggs Joel on. “Put your hands out in front of you,” he commands. Your arms shoot out, stretching them across the seat above your head. “Such a needy little slut. You’re drippin’ all over my fucking seat, baby girl.” He strikes you again and your arms flinch. “Keep them there.” 

Your ass is starting to get pink, his splotchy handprints covering it. The world around him starts to fade, all that he can see is you and your ass - and he wants to make it hurt. Then he wants to make it good. So very good. 

His strikes keep coming, he’s like a man possessed. “Stop, Joel. Please.” 

He drops your ankles, then uses his hand to spread your thighs apart, the denim biting into your knees. “Shhh…just a little bit more. Look at this messy pussy. You don’t want me to stop.” 

He hits you again and you start to hate how much he’s right. You don’t want him to stop, you’re on the verge of coming and he hasn’t even touched you yet. You’re sure the second he’s near your clit you’ll explode. 

Both of your cheeks are glowing red and Joel finally stops. You’ve both lost track of how many times he’s hit you. His large palm rubs the marks. You know you should keep your mouth shut, but fuck do you love to rile him up. 

“Are you done now? I have work to get back to.” 

Joel growls behind you. You hear the sound of his belt undoing, the leather whipping out from the demin loops. “I’m sick of your goddamn mouth, baby girl.” 

Your eyes widen in fear, stomach twisting up over the thought of him striking your sore ass with his thick leather belt. Your pussy, however, flutters in excitement. Slut, you think to yourself. 

You hear his buckle clinking, he grabs you by the hair and jerks your head back. “Open you mouth,” he says with a snarl. You obey him and he slides the folded up leather between your teeth. “Bite down on this. You can speak to me again once you’ve learned your lesson.” 

You press your teeth into the rough leather, waiting for his next move. His hand comes across the back of your thigh and it’s a whole different sensation. The pain shoots straight to your core, the walls of your pussy clenching harder than your teeth do as you whine out a high pitched squeal. On instinct your hands shoot back, knees bending to protect yourself from him. He steps back from you, without his heat you’re left in the cold air. 

“Arms up and legs down,” he says in an eerily calm voice. 

You whimper again, grinding your teeth against the leather of his belt before slowly peeling your arms and legs away from your body, returning to Joel’s desired position. You’re so wet that it’s staring pool along the leather seat of Joel’s truck, your hips slipping slightly. 

“Dirty little thing. I’m tryin to punish you and you’re sopping wet.” He steps forward and lays a loud sharp slap with perfect precision right across your sore thigh. 

You yelp again, whining as your lash line fills with tears. This is not what you thought would happen when Joel threatened to punish you. And you definitely didn’t expect to fucking love it. You’re so turned on that you feel dizzy. 

Joel’s lips come to your thigh. Light kisses and his scratchy facial hair peppering along your red hot skin. “Fuck me,” you say around the leather clamped between your teeth. 

Joel laughs into your skin, kissing along the handprints he’s left on your ass. You’re squirming underneath him, pushing your ass towards his face, desperate for him to make you come. His hands grip around your shorts and your whole body relaxes at the thought of him finally fucking you. “I need you to listen to me now, ok?” 

You nod fervently and he lets out an amused laugh. You arch your back at him invitingly, but instead of removing your shorts he yanks them back up. You moan out in protest as he lifts you down from the truck. His strong fingers work to do up your shorts before he spins you. You look like a wreck; mascara smudged under your eyes, cheeks pink, eyes glazed and dopey looking. Cock drunk and he hasn’t even given it to you. He grabs the belt and you release it for him. It’s killing him not to fuck you right here and now. 

His hand cups your chin, squeezing your cheeks and locking eyes with you. “Do you want me to fuck you?”

You try to nod but he’s gripping you so tightly. “Yea? Then you need to do what I say. Ok?” 

“Mm-hmm” 

“Go in there and quit. Then come back out here and I will fuck you so hard that you’ll feel it in your throat.” 

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[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hat in hand, thank you for your time, sex ed question: do orgasms from masturbation and orgasms from partnered sex actually feel different? Is it just the intimacy that makes people like it more?

hi anon,

great question, and I'm about to make a real meal of it.

so, first off, let's make one thing clear: the mechanisms that create an orgasm are the same regardless of the cause. no matter what's getting you off, regardless of what part of your body is being stimulated, it's the same nerves and muscles responding.

that may sound obvious, but it hasn't always. Freud, for instance, advanced the idea that vaginal and clitoral orgasms were fundamentally different, and that women who preferred to orgasm by touching their clitoris were less psychologically mature than women who preferred vaginal orgasms. fast forward to now, and we know the only difference between a clitoral and vaginal orgasm is that clitoral orgasms are generally easier, thanks to the incredible amount of nerve endings - and that many orgasms that result from vaginal penetration result at least in part from the large internal portion of the clitoris being stimulated through the vaginal wall. huge W for the clit!

now, having said that: just because the mechanics are the same doesn't mean that every orgasm is going to fee identical, or that every single thing that could produce an orgasm is going to actually work for everyone. sex with a partner can feel very different from sex with a vibrator which can feel very different from sex with just your hand, and even those individual methods aren't going to result in the exact same experience every time. there are a tremendous number of factors that influence arousal and sexual response, including many that have nothing to do with sex directly but nonetheless impact your body and mind and the way stimuli is received.

think of it as being similar to a meal - you could eat the exact same food, prepared the same way, two times and still feel very differently about depending on other factors in your day. when you're in a good mood, enjoying a day off, and able to sit with your food for as long as you like with no rush, you might savor the meal much more, take the time to appreciate the individual flavors and ingredients, and eat more in a single sitting. you might spend the rest of the day thinking about how good the food was, and look forward eagerly to the leftovers. whereas if you come to lunch on a short break from work, unable to devote much time to eating and already stressed out from an unpleasant day, you may be more likely to eat quickly to sate your hunger and zip back to work without taking much time to think about the food at all, because the meal is just fuel to keep going.

neither of these ways of eating are wrong; they both serve different needs and have a time and place. while I'd love to be able to cherish each meal, I'm certainly not going to pretend that I never eat just to have enough fuel to keep chugging until the next meal.

and, to extend this metaphor: we were imagining that was the exact same food, eaten under two very different circumstances. now factor in the infinite different kinds of food a person could eat in infinite different situations. now imagine that it's things that make you cum instead of food (which are still the same thing, for somebody out there, and to them I say congrats for speedrunning this one), and you've got a pretty good grasp on how infinitely variable the experience of orgasm is.

so: do orgasms with partners actually feel different? sure, but only in the sense that all orgasms can feel different from each other.

partnered orgasms can come with a lot of extra bells and whistles thanks to involving a whole other person (or multiple people), which opens the door to many more forms of stimulation than most people can manage on their own, as well as some inherent unpredictability - while you can, obviously, know exactly how you plan to touch yourself and receive pretty immediate feedback to how it makes you feel, but with other people you gain both the ability to be surprised and the necessity of much more communication than solo sex. all of that means that partnered sex can be a pretty substantially different experience than getting off alone - not necessarily worse or better, but definitely different, and definitely not just because of how the orgasm feels.

so why do people like it more? well, not all people do. for some people, it's vastly easier and more comfortable to just get off alone. some people like partnered sex but don't orgasm easily in the process; I'm one of those! I think I've had a grand total of one (1) sexual partner who could reliably get me off, but that didn't mean I wasn't having fun with the others - orgasm just wasn't a priority, because I went in knowing I'd probably need to finish myself off if I wanted to cum and didn't sweat it.

of course, the opposite also exists - for some people, masturbation doesn't do jack shit, and partnered sex is the way to go. some people only get off, or vastly prefer to get off, to scenarios that necessitate the presence of other people. some people aren't that interested in sex for the sake of sex, but like having a sense of connection with their partner(s).

and for many, there's no need to have a preference between getting off alone or with a partner in the first place - they're filling two different needs, without needing to be compared. why pit two bad bitches against each other? for me, getting myself off is easy and convenient, and having sex with someone else is a great way to play. both good, both serving totally different niches in my life.

tl;dr: variety in all things, babes.

[chaesparklez]

1.17am | gunwook x afab reader

wc: 2.3k

content: 18+ MINORS DNI

gendered descriptions, ex!bf gunwook, angst, emotional, oral sex f!receiving, heavy petting, rough sex, makeup sex, unprotected sex (practice safe sex yall)

summary: “just look at this, jagi. we’re so good together.”

1.17am. a surprise visit from the person you want to see least. well, maybe not the least…

a/n: sorry for being mia guys!! hope you enjoy this latest piece, i’m not too familiar with writing angst so hopefully it’s not too clunky haha. cross-posted on ao3 & wattpad on user @/chaesparkle.

it had been a long week of work, your social battery too drained to join your friends for a night out. you splay yourself out on the sofa, absentmindedly watching a show and crocheting. a nearby lamp illuminates the room with an atmospheric golden glow.

you sigh. admittedly, part of the reason why you were so drained was because of your ex, gunwook. his work meant you barely saw him for the past few months, eventually feeling like he wasn't making time for you culminating in your breakup. despite his begging to make things right, you just knew things would never work out. clearly he thought differently, as he had been blowing up your phone all day.

why you hadn't simply blocked him yet, you couldn't quite figure out.

a knock at the door.

you frown looking at the clock: 1.17am. who on earth could it be at this hour? you throw a cardigan on and amble towards the door.

"who is it?" you call lazily.

no response. you furrow your brows, pausing for a second before another knock resonates through the room. and you realise. two firm raps followed by another quick tap; you know exactly who was knocking. the blood rushes to your head, face already heating up in anger. you were already having a rough week and now having your space invaded by the last person you wanted to see made you angry.

“what the fuck, gunwook?” you swing the door open. 'texting me hundreds of times wasn't enough so now you show up to my doorstep?'

gunwook stands before you, expression indecipherable. he simply scans you up and down with a dark gaze.

you shake your head in frustration. 'so??'

he slinks past you without a word, making his way into the living room with you following him becoming increasingly mad.

"oh, so you're just gonna waltz into my house then play the silent act? i don't even know why you’re h-"

"because i fucking missed you!!" he shouts, turning towards you finally. his cheeks redden like they always do when he gets emotional, dark eyes blazing.

'you break up with me all of a sudden then expect me to be okay with it?' he continues. he inches closer, towering over you.

you stare up at him, gaze cold and hard.

"it's hilarious" you say, keeping your voice level,  'how you didn't contact me for weeks at a time while we were together and now that im not putting up with your shit anymore you come crawling back.'

"i told you that i'd do better. we can make it work, i'm serious." his tone low.

"why do you keep deluding yourself into thinking you can fix this? you'll literally be touring for the next two months. forget seeing me, you won't even have time to call me."

you feel a lump form in your throat, quickly turning away so he wouldn't see your eyes moisten.

"why don't you have any trust in me?" he says exasperated. he grabs your wrist forcing you to face him.

'please. give me a chance,' he whispers, gaze intently fixed on you.

all this was too overwhelming for you. your exhaustion, him being in your space asking questions you couldn't answer, and in the middle of it all, you being very aware of his closeness to you in this moment, face so close to yours you were tempted to brush the hair out of his eyes...

shut the fuck up, you tell yourself off mentally. you look at gunwook, determined to drive him out.

"why the hell should i trust you?" you say. 'all the missed calls, cancelled dates, all you did was take me for granted.'

"that's not true", his jaw clenching.

"it's how you made me feel."

"you have no idea how *i* feel. i-"

"i do. you're a selfish jerk. you don't give a fuck about me, you don't-"

"LET ME SPEAK!" gunwook yells, voice making a boom that resonates throughout the room. you jump, shocked at the outburst. gunwook looks at you intensely, eyes blazing with passion.

'i missed you everyday. it was hard for me too, spending so much time apart from you and not even being able to contact you because the managers were always watching.'

he takes a step closer.

'i was going to see you first as soon as i came back to korea. but then you texted me all of a sudden saying 'it's over' and then disappeared?? you have no idea how much that broke me.' his voice breaks on the last sentence.

you look up at him sadly, clenching your jaw and trying to control your impulse to hug him. you couldn't. not now. you didn't want to start something you couldn't finish.

"i think you should leave," you say quietly.

gunwook stays standing in the same spot clearly having no intentions to abide by your words. he inches closer to you, eyes shining.

"stop. gunwook, i said don't come closer," you warn as he takes slow steps towards you.

the look in his eyes made you nervous. it was the way he'd look at you before you'd leave a party together, giving your thigh a quick squeeze with you both knowing exactly what the night was in for.

'gunwook, seriously...' you breathe, your breath quickening. he continues to approach you silently with that intent look in his eyes, staring down at you fervently.

'really i don't think we should-' you begin to say before a long finger rests on your lips shushing you.

"quiet." he says in a lowered voice.

his hand rests on the wall beside you, his face inches from yours. he cocks his head to the side with a smile. your pupils waver as you look up at him.

"got anything else to say?" gunwook whispers, pinning you against the wall. he smirks.

a hand roams down to the waistband of your shorts, cool fingers meeting the heat of your center. you can't help but let out a shaky sigh, having forgotten what this felt like in the time you spent apart.

you stare at him fervently. tall, broad shoulders, and those determined eyes that'd observe every detail of the way your body responded to him.

and the expression on your face is more than enough to let gunwook know how you feel. you want him. all of him.

you both melt into a mess in each other's arms. your hands locked behind his neck, his enveloping your waist as you share a rough, sloppy kiss. as if you're both trying to consume eachother, as if you're making up for lost time.

his full lips lock around yours, the heat of your tongues melding as you both kiss passionately, not even moving in time as your mutual desperation drives you to take in as much of each other as you can.

you pull him closer by the collar and run your hands through his thick black hair. you bite gently on his full bottom lip and he kisses you harder, tongue exploring your mouth tasting you.

a trail of hurriedly removed clothes is splayed on the floor behind you as you lay under him on the sofa. with his body on top of you, the heat of his milky skin against yours has a flush rising in your center. you drag a hand from his broad chest down to his toned abs, and he gazes at you beneath him with all the yearning in the world behind those brown eyes. he leaves warm kisses trailing down your body, the tingle of his breath on your flesh sending a shiver down your spine so you arch into his touch. he looks down at you with an intoxicating gaze, a large hand enveloping the curve of your waist, and kisses your stomach.

"i missed this so badly," he says in a lowered voice.

he positions your legs to rest on his shoulders and begins to plant open-mouthed kisses on your inner thighs. you gasp, the muscles in your thighs contracting. his tongue makes contact with your throbbing pussy, lewdly licking a stripe up your slit. your eyes flutter shut as he begins to work his magic on your center, the movements of his tongue slow and sensual at first, then increasing in speed as your hips began to undulate against his mouth, your body begging for more.

his tongue runs up and down your folds, your thighs trembling but remaining firmly locked in place by his firm grip. he laps up your arousal like a dog thirsty for water, the view of your breasts jolting as you reacted to his touch further motivating him to deepen his movements.

you moan desperately and throw your head back. his grip on your flesh tightens and he moans against your clit, the vibration sending another wave of pleasure through your body. you peer down at him and feel your center flutter at the view; his muscled arms flexing wrapped around your thighs, face buried in your pussy letting out impassioned moans.

you lace a hand through his thick hair, tugging gently and moaning as he continues stimulating your clit. you make eye contact, a faint blush seeping across your cheeks at the intensity of his gaze. he picks up the pace and you let out a yelp. the relentless flicks of his tongue against your clit having your hips rolling against his tongue more and more deeply.

fuck, you really did miss him.

you plead in a shaky voice: "gunwook.. need you inside me..." and he retracts slowly from your center, almost reluctantly as he breaks out of his daze.

"oh yeah?" he asks with a sly smirk. 'guess you missed this a lot, huh?' he begins to kiss your neck lazily, his hand roaming your body again.

"s-so full of yourself.." you stutter, unable to deliver this remark as bitingly as you intend as he pinches your nipple lightly.

"don't i have a right to be?" he smiles. continuing to caress you. 'after all..' he whispers, 'isn't this what you missed the most after i came back from overseas schedules?'

his long fingers are now between your legs, rubbing along the length of your center and drawing circles around your clit. you let out a moan, stomach contracting in pleasure as your hips rise to ask for more again. gunwook really did know you inside and out. exactly how to touch you so you'd be gasping and arching into him.

he aligns his erect cock with your pussy, tip red and leaking a bead of precum. as he pushes his length inside you, you throw your head back and gasp for air at the feeling of him filling you up. his massive length still had you gasping for air even though you'd had sex countless times already. he lets out a deep moan at the way your pussy wraps around his cock and begins to move his hips, thrusting deeper inside you.

you lock your fingers around his neck so you're inches apart from eachothers faces, both hearing eachothers breathy sighs of exhilaration. his weight on top of you makes you feel engulfed in him.

gunwook's cheeks are flushed, his eyes slanted and locked on yours as you moan and whimper looking into his eyes with each thrust. he adjusts his hips so his cock starts to hit that spot deep inside you with every thrust, prompting a loud "fuck!" from you.

your pussy clenches around his length deliciously, and he can't help but squeeze his eyes shut and moan into your neck.

"fuck, jagi... feels like this pussy was made for me," he breathes.

"don't.. call me jagi.." you protest weakly between thrusts, not sure you even believe your own words at this point.

he lets out a breathy laugh and his pace quickens.

"or what?" he challenges, his voice low and husky in your ear.

his thrusts become faster and harder so you scream out in ecstasy, his strong thrusts having you moaning and gasping for air.

"ah, j-just like that.. fuck!" you cry between moans.

gunwook starts to rub circles on your clit again sending another wave of pleasure crashing over you, the overstimulation making your head spin. your hands claw helplessly at his broad back leaving red scratches in their wake. your eyes begin to water and you look at him through half-lidded eyes, his gaze meeting yours with the same emotions. his bangs are damp from perspiration, hair falling into his narrowed eyes.

"gunwook- i- please-" you stutter out before screwing your eyes shut, your jaw open in a fixed contortion of pleasure.

"what was that, jagi? can't hear you." he chuckles with a raspy voice.

the view of you overstimulated and teary eyed, literally fucked dumb, drives gunwook crazy. he lets out a raspy sigh as he watches his length moving in and out of you. your pussy is dripping wet, the sound of skin slapping against skin so raw and visceral that you both start to cum. your hips begin to rut against his, your movements and impassioned breaths syncing with eachother in time. he moans, forehead against yours.

you gaze blearily and kiss him passionately. your climax begins to run through you and you moan between his lips, your cries becoming louder as he fucks you through your orgasm.

"ah, gunwook!" you throw your head back and cry out at the feeling of his cock pushing inside you as your walls contract around him, practically having you seeing stars.

gunwook lets out a constrained grunt as he reaches his climax, biceps flexing as he grips the arm of the sofa. with a final impassioned thrust he pulls out just as he cums, hot sticky fluid coating your stomach. he sinks on top of you as you both catch your breath, a mess of slick and perspiration. your arms are wrapped around his back as he sinks his head into your neck, warm breath tickling your skin.

he gazes at you laying before him staring up at him through half-lidded eyes.

"just look at this, jagi. we're so good together." he breathes.

you regard him with half-lidded eyes, chest rising and falling against his.

"should we… start over?" you whisper.

[kayhi808]

First Crush - 6

After the park, all Abby could talk about was her day with Bucky. Even when her eyes were closed, she kept chatting away, past her bedtime. Part of you found it adorable & the other part had you worried. Abby is way to attached for your liking.

Jason was an absent father, but that still doesn't mean Abby didn't miss him or wasn't affected by his death. He died in a plane crash. His daredevil ways that first attracted you to him was the same reason you were alone now. He wasn't brave & heroic, dying for his country or on a mission. He was foolish and selfish, hot-dogging it when he lost control of his aircraft. Most people dropped the subject after you say he died in a plane crash, assuming it was work related. He was stupid. Always chasing the next high. The next rush. He had a wife and baby at home. He should have been thinking of you and Abby.

You couldn't deny the attraction you felt to Bucky, but look at his job. He was an Avenger for God's sake! The bad guys he chases were much worse than your common criminals. The risks were much higher. You were second-guessing you decision in exposing Abby to Bucky. Not that you could truly stop it. Abby was drawn to him at first sight.

*****

"There you are." Bucky enters your office & sits in the chair opposite your desk.

Pushing your lunch to the side, "Hey Buck, did you need something?"

"For the past couple days I thought I'd see you in the cafeteria."

"Sounds like high school," laughing, "I was studying in the library." Bucky frowns at you, "I usually bring home lunch so i eat in my office. It's easier."

Leaning forward, "Well, tomorrow, would you have lunch with me? We don't have to stay here. We can go to this diner around the corner. Their burgers are pretty great." He picks up that you're unsure. "C'mon, doll. I know you want to."

You laugh at his ego. I mean, he wasn't wrong. "Ok."

"I'll swing by around 1p. Is that too late?"

"No, that's fine."

"Then its a date."

"It's not a date. It's lunch." He doesn't say anything, just gives you a look. Its a date.

******

The following night at the gym with Sam, Sam broaches a subject that the others were shying away from. "I saw you leaving with Y/N earlier."

"We went to the diner for lunch."

"So, what's going on with you two?"

Bucky shrugs, "Just 2 friends having lunch."

"MmmHmmm. Do you know what you're doing?"

"What do you mean?"

"Y/N's a special breed. She's a single mother. She don't need you wasting her time. You take on extra responsibilities if you start dating her."

"Relax."

"I'm just saying, you can easily find someone else to kill time with. You string her along, she's not the only one you'll be hurting. From what i hear, her daughter is obsessed with you."

"We went on a picnic & lunch. We're still figuring out what this is."

"And that's fine. Just keep in mind she brings more to the table than just herself."

"Ok, got it. Lecture over?"

Sam shrugs and leaves the gym.

*****

"Mama?"

"Yes."

"When am I seeing Bucky again?"

"I don't know, baby. He's very busy with work." You feel a little guilty at how badly Abby wants to see Bucky & you've been having lunch with him everyday for the past couple weeks. He's been dropping by your office with his own lunch to spend time with you.

"Can I asks him? I can draws him a letter." You laugh but stop when you see the earnest little look on her face.

"You know what? That sounds like a very good idea. Maybe you can invite him over to watch a movie & then dinner?"

Abby screams, climbing on the couch to give you a wet kiss on your cheek. "Bucky comes to my house??"

You release a deep breath, "Yes, you can invite him here." She runs off to her room to draw his letter. You lean your head back on the couch hoping you made the right choice.

*****

LIke clockwork, Bucky shows up at 1pm for lunch with you. You slide Abby's drawing across the desk to him. He has a smile on his face even before he opens it. When he opens it, his smile freezes and he looks between you and Abby's drawing. You cover your lips with your fingertips while you watch him, trying to suppress a smile.

"Doll, you're going to have to help me out here. Wh...what am I looking at?"

"What? You can't figure it out?" Bucky is put on the spot. "You're lucky Abby isn't here." You tap the left side of the picture. "What's this?"

"It looks like guts and eyeballs."

"Bucky!!"

"I don't know."

"It's spaghetti and meatballs."

"Oh! Ok. So this is us," indicating 3 stick figures in the middle. "And...I need help again. "This isn't brains."

"Jesus! You're terrible at this. It's a bowl of popcorn. Abby is trying to invite you over for a movie and dinner at our place."

Bucky laughs so hard, he has to rest his head on your desk. "So, I'm not invited over to commit a murder, because I don't do that anymore."

"My baby does NOT murder people! I'm not sure I want you over anymore."

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry." He grabs your hand from across the desk & kisses your knuckles. "Please don't take away the invite. I want to come over."

"Will you be free this Saturday?"

"Yes, I leave next week for a mission, but I'll be here on Saturday."

"Ok," you text him your address. "Maybe 3p? It'll be after her nap & we can watch a movie before dinner."

"Thank you, I'll be there." He give you his charming smile & you have to look away. You hope this isn't a mistake.

Next Chapter

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[beansandsprouts]

Sunshine (Part 2)

Part 1

Summary: Bucky interacts with you here and there and finds himself feeling more connected to you. Driving him to want to see your soulmate mark even more.

Warnings: none

Sorry it took so long! College and work got me dying lmao. Updates will continue to be kinda spaced out. Fingers crossed I can get another one out over the weekend.

Also I am absolutely delighted by how much interest there's been in this! Thank you all sm for reading. Down below with the tags there's a link to a little survey, even if you're already on the tag list please fill it out. It's how I'll be keeping track of the tag list. If you don't fill it out you won't be tagged.

He hadn't been able to sleep that night.

You were right across the hall. Two doors separated you from him. And it drove him crazy knowing that you, his possible soulmate, were so close yet just out of reach.

He had dozed in and out of consciousness through the night, but found himself wide awake when he heard shuffling coming from your room. Super soldier hearing meant he heard you get out of bed and pad to your closet. What were you doing?

He heard your door shut quietly, and you make your way down the hall, and, after a few moments, the ding of the elevator door.

His mind raced, wondering what you could be doing. The next thing he knew he was tugging on a hoodie over his tank top and sweats over his boxers. He padded down the hall to the elevator, the little number above lit up saying the elevator was stopped at the floor right underneath him. The training room.

That made sense. From the way you'd spoken about your time in the military yesterday, you were highly trained and a huge asset, you likely had gotten up this early to train for years. He stood there for a moment, debating on going down as well.

The thought that maybe he'd get to see your soulmate mark was enough to have him going back to his room to get his shoes, water bottle, and towel. He wanted to make sure he looked like he was actually down there to train.

Hey, maybe he'd even get to spar with you, get to see what you were capable of.

The elevator moved only one floor, but it felt like it was taking forever. The doors opened to the small lobby and he pushed open the doors to the training room. You were doing some stretches, warming yourself up, and you looked up when he entered.

"Mornin!"

He mumbled the greeting back, now suddenly extremely nervous and starting to wonder why exactly he thought this would be a good idea.

"Didn't think I'd catch anyone this early." You seemed unbothered, warm smile despite the fact that it was so early you could still see the stars in the dark sky if you looked out the window.

He grunted in response, not being able to find the words to respond. He stood there for a moment, watching you, before walking off to start his own warmup. Which consisted of lifting more weight than you could even dream of getting even an inch over your chest. But it was light work for him.

You continued stretching but subtly watched him. You were a little disappointed he was wearing a hoodie, it did kind of obscure everything. Though you could imagine how good his muscles looked lifting that weight. Your face warmed a bit at the thought and you tried to force yourself to focus on the light burn in your calves as you stretched.

After a bit, you moved to wrap your hands and feet, wanting to practice on one of the dozen punching bags Tony had in there. He'd offhandedly mentioned he had to design a lot of the equipment himself so they could withstand the beating of the two super soldiers living in this place.

You focused on the swaying bag in front of you, vaguely aware of Bucky doing things behind you, but not paying him too much mind. Your mind was on getting out that pent up energy. Working with the Avengers was going to be very different from your previous work, and you knew there'd be a lot less for you to do on the daily. You had a feeling you'd probably be spending a lot of time in here.

You barely registered Bucky saying your name from behind you. When it did you paused your beating on the punching bag and turned to him.

"Whats up?"

"Spar?"

"Huh?"

Bucky gestured to the mat meant for sparring a little ways away. It was a little padding so whoever got dropped on their ass only hurt their pride.

"Oh! Yeah, sure." You grinned, you had to admit the idea was exciting. You were curious to see how you'd fare against one of these two.

The two of you settled into stances on the mat and you gave him a teasing grin, "I'm not gonna go easy on you."

You saw the corner of his mouth twitch with amusement as he raised a brow.

"Oh?"

"I don't have to be as worried about breaking you."

His eyes lit with curiosity, just what exactly were you capable of.

He watched you closely as you circled each other before lunging, swinging his non-metal arm at you. You blocked the hit easily and returned it with a swing of your own, which landed. His head snapped to the side as your fist connected with his jaw.

He took a step back, rubbing where you'd hit him. He hadn't expected you to hit that hard. Hell, Steve was one of the few people who's hits actually made his body ache. You packed some heat he was not expecting.

He squared up again and the two of you traded some blows back and forth before he realized you were barely flinching at the hits he landed. So he decided to turn it up a notch, striking harder than he had before. You reciprocated that.

As the two of you sparred, his eyes narrowed, and Bucky's focus turned to seeing how far he could push you. His blows struck hard, one particular hit to your abdomen forced the air from your lungs, and you stepped back gasping.

He pushed forward, though, and despite the lack of air, you fended him off well. To anyone watching, it would seem like a friendly sparring match had turned malicious. However, both yours and Bucky's eyes were lit with delight at the fact that you'd found an equal opponent.

You finally decided to end the session with a swift attack to knock him to the ground and taking the opportunity to pin him, his arm twisted behind his back.

"I surrender." He chuckled. You released him quickly and offered a hand to help him up, which he took.

"Youre...tougher than I expected."

You tilted your head, "Did Tony not tell you?"

"Tell me what?" He asked.

"I'm also a weird military experiment. Except they aimed more for stealth than brute strength with me, still gave me that enhanced strength though." You explained as you used your towel to dab the sweat from your neck.

"You haven't been particularly stealthy."

You laughed, "Haven't been trying. Tell you what, turn off the light and see if you can find me in the dark."

Bucky's eyes scanned you curiously before walking over and flicking off the lights. When he turned back, he tried to peer through the darkness to find you. He even tried to listen for your breathing and heartbeat, but the room was dead silent.

It was unnerving as he stepped further into the room as his eyes adjusted to the darkness. He slowly turned in a circle, hoping to spot you.

He thought he'd spotted you in a corner of the room until he felt a kick to the back of his knees, knocking him down. Suddenly, there was a hand gently resting around his throat and two fingertips pressed against his head in a mock figure of a gun.

"Surprise." You giggled and released him and went over to turn on the lights as Bucky stood up in a daze.

"How?" He demanded.

"My special serum gave me the ability to slow my heart and breath rate to the point where it's imperceptible, even to you. And I can move lightly so you can't even hear me walk. I can see in the dark, and all other senses are enhanced. Plus, the whole strength and pain tolerance thing. Literally, you just stealthy."

Bucky stared at you as you explained. He slowly realized you weren't really an equal. In fact, you were probably "better" than him in a sense. You had the ability to be completely imperceptible, even to him. You'd just proven you could have killed him easily, and he wouldn't have even seen it coming. It half scared him, and half had his heart racing with attraction.

"You ok?" You asked. He'd been staring at you silently for a good few seconds.

"I've just never met someone who could take me down like that."

"We're good though right?" Your expression had changed to one of nervousness.

"Why wouldn't we be?"

"Some men have a tendency to feel threatened or emasculated."

He couldn't help the chuckle that escaped him.

"Don't gotta worry about that here."

"Good." You smiled softly at him before it turned into a mischievous grin, "Wanna see who can squat the most weight?"

His mouth quirked up in a half smile as he followed you. The next two hours consisted of you challenging him to see who could handle more. Endurance wise, you did better. However, in terms of raw strength, he did better than you.

Bucky found himself feeling amused, you were so different from him and Steve. They had a tendency to be a bit more reserved. Quieter. But you were bubbly and all over the place, all smiles and energy. It was strange knowing that you'd come from the military.

After a while, the two of you headed upstairs to eat breakfast. By then, most of the others were already awake and were surprised to see Bucky willingly hanging out with you.

It was amusing in a sense. You were like a living ray of sunshine, and Bucky was like a living storm cloud. Polar opposites. However right about now Bucky didn't seem to be as "rainy" as he usually was. The look on his face was more relaxed, and he nodded attentively as you spoke. He was genuinely interested in whatever you were saying.

The second you excused yourself for a shower, the teasing began.

"Seems Bucky has taken an interest in our new teammate." Natasha said slyly.

Bucky shot her a glare and busied himself with a cup of coffee.

"Can you blame him? She's a cute little thing." Sam chuckled.

"I heard she's a great warrior. That makes her even more attractive." Thor said from his seat.

Bucky gritted his teeth and sat down on the couch by Steve with his cup of coffee. He didn't want to tell them exactly why he was so interested. He knew if he did they'd want to get involved and it would just ruin everything.

So for now, he'd deal with the teasing and hope it wouldn't be long until he found out if it was his name marked on your arm.

He stared down into his mug, ignoring the joking going on around him. He barely knew you, and yet he was practically praying that you were his soulmate. That the name he had on his arm was written in your writing. That the name on your arm was his written in his messy chicken scratch.

-------------------------------------------------

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[hoiststowline]

_sunstreaker x reader [part three]

part one || part two

“You really stayed out here all night?”

momentarily, he looses his serene composure, his stifled yelp of surprise causing his engine to rev loudly in compensation. he hadn’t been anticipating your arrival from the garage, rather training his mirrors impatiently toward your front door instead.

how you manage to always sneak up on him remains a mystery. perhaps he’s let his guard dip down far too low, or he’s found himself too relaxed in your presence. either or, both were cause for concern on a surface level, yet every time he dwells on such a concept, he can't bring himself to care all that much.

“This again?” sunstreaker gravels, now pivoting his gaze to address you. “Did you hit your head? I said I was going to, and I did.”

“I guess I did, technically.” still in your pajamas, a mug of tea holds firmly in your right hand as you cross the unoccupied arm over your chest. “But there's no correlation. You’re the weirdo who made up that Decepticons were on my street.”

upon your approach to his driver-side door, sunstreaker finds himself grumbling in vivid disagreement. “I did no such thing.”

he observes your sweeping glance, taking in the early morning and the relatively empty block. “So, did you find them?”

"No." he responds curtly, but leaves room to quickly follow up upon your knowing look. "I did not. That doesn't mean I made them up."

sunstreaker surveys your exhausted appearance, body language lax but something coils tightly in your expression. your clothes were somewhat askew, hinting that you really had just rolled out of bed upon meeting him outside.

"Are you really going to take me to work?" you hum, taking a sip of your drink to distract the fact he still appears in a very timid and placid mood, unusual for the mech. not an unfamiliar attitude, but after the previous nights occurrences, you supposed he'd be a bit cranky.

without missing a beat, he answers your proposed query. "Yes. Another thing I said I would do, and intend on completing."

"You act like you follow through on everything." you offer an eye roll to his scoff of offense. "Dude, don't even start. It's too early."

"Dumbaft. Make it make sense, y/n. Last night it was too late to care," his delivery was almost as he intended, but he hopes the sarcasm was evident. "Now it's too early? I can't win."

softly smiling over the rim of the mug, you finally decide to poke fun at his nonchalant demeanor. "You're in a good mood, Sunny."

"So what if I am?" immediately countered, as if he took ire with your observation. "You say that as if it's a bad thing."

"It's not." you answer honestly, taking a brave step forward. "I just...wasn't expecting it."

there's an uncomfortable lull that overcomes the exchange, sunstreaker faltering to scrounge any sort of feasible response to such genuineness. just as he goes to change the subject, you sense his malaise on the subject and deftly pivot the conference.

"Do you have plans for the day?"

"No." he replies, internally begging for you to come closer. "I'll probably just hang around until you get off of work."

he watches your brow raise, whether it be in confusion or amusement, sunstreaker remains unsure. he almost doesn't dare to question it any further, but with such a guise pointed his way, he's unable to help himself.

"What?" he balks. "You're the one that's starting now, y/n. Knock it off."

"Are you asking me to do something later in the most unclear way possible?" you press, closing the persisting distance between the two of you. as if he sensed it, the driver-side door pops open, wordlessly beckoning you inside.

"Yes, I am." sunstreaker says firmly, without missing a beat. "I'd like that, if you would."

and who are you to deny such a harmless thing, especially since he asked so nicely.

"I would." upon entry, the door closes over, mission successful.

in the dwindling minutes before having to get ready for work, you enjoy the moment of peace for as long as time would allow. going slack against the black leather of the seat, the discussion pinballs all around, ranging from light teases to what agendas and schedules were to come in the coming week.

[lovestory]

i haven't really felt like opening tumblr at all this year, but it was obviously very moving when i saw taylor's post about her masters, and i thought of this community immediately. i thought about the day when we found out scooter had bought the masters initially, posting about it, and taylor seeing those posts we made on here. i feel pretty inclined to share this with you: i got a new job, i started last week - and it pays more than double what my last job did. i'm the in house graphic designer for a huge commercial construction company now, they take really good care of me, and i've dropped out of uni because i have found success and love for design again. i didn't even know opportunities like that existed in the small area i live in, and i definitely didn't think they'd choose me.

in january i made the decision to leave tumblr. aside from a general disinterest and struggling massively with my mental and physical health, i was just tired. being treated the way i was online since before i even turned 13 was exhausting. i had people in my inbox when i was a minor sending me sexual messages and begging me to post my prom pictures, people making "gossip" blogs about me, people sending me my address, people sending me three part messages about why they hate me. whenever i'd say i hated this kind of behaviour, people would blame me for not turning my ask box off. last year in particular i'd dealt with a couple of stalking incidents and completely closed myself off from people contacting me on here. but instead of respecting that, i would just have other blogs get anons about me. one day i saw a mutual get a message about me, and half the shit they were saying just wasn't even true, and i'd just fucking had enough. i just wanted to step away and be a fan in a different way for awhile and try to focus on getting better. consume content and think what i thought without people arguing or making vague posts in response.

i moved out of our rental in april. as we were moving out, it led to the discovery that the entire house was infested with black mould that had been painted over/covered up when it was renovated. this mould was making me incredibly sick after living with it for so long, my entire body was covered in hives every day, i couldn't breathe, i couldn't keep my eyes open, i felt awful. our new house is finished being built, they're just doing the landcaping. i can't explain how sick i felt every day, and what a relief it is to not be in that kind of pain anymore, and to not be renting anymore.

i've always felt like i was working harder than everyone else just to compensate for the fact that i'm me. it was so liberating to walk in for an interview and know i had exactly what they needed. it was so liberating to be offered so much money for what i do, no arguments, no telling me that they couldn't afford to pay me decently. i nearly gave up on graphic design, i loved it too much to let it be ruined. i'm not afraid to say that i'm good at what i do anymore, i approach my work with confidence. for six years i've worked as the only employee for two separate businesses, being paid worse than anyone else i know, and i'm so relieved to be working with people again - talking to people my age. the isolation was killing me.

it makes me emotional looking at my blog as an archive now, i am so proud of all the little things i made over the years and what i contributed. being a fan of taylor was my life for so long and the only thing i held onto to keep going, i love the records of hers that i have, i love the memories, i love that she used to see my posts. and i'd be lying if i said what the fandom has turned into hasn't turned me off from participating. i will never return to tumblr in the capacity i once was, but if i ever get a thought or an itch to make something fandom related, i'll post it. i guess it felt important to share how drastically, a lot of you have followed me for over 10 years now. i really had to push myself to bring myself out of where i was stuck, it was really hard. but it's okay now.

[reneesghostinthelivingroom]

Hey boo, love your writing so much

Was wondering if I could request a billie fic.

So I was thinking that this takes place on the HMHAS tour where reader is the guitarist in the band. Reader is mascfem and clearly works out. Billie flirts with reader a lot and on stage Billie and the guitarist kinda do a thing like Renee and Towa when they play tummy hurts. The fans can see the tension too and after a couple shows they kinda have a lil steamy moment after the show then get in a relationship but decide to keep it private but the fans keep speculating as Billie and reader keep getting closer on stage. You can choose how it ends and other details but that’s the premise.

It’s fully up to you if you want to write it of course ☺️ also I saw you talk about picking an emoji was thinking I could be 🎸if that’s cool with you

Baby, I Think you were Made for Me

|| Billie Eilish x masc!fem!reader

|| Warnings; swearing, small smut scene, slightly oblivious reader, Billie teasing reader

|| Summary; Billie can't seem to stop flirting with reader on stage and takes these feelings off stage with her..

Requests open!

Started; october 20th

Finished; october 20th

Reblogs, comments and likes all really help and are very much appreciated! Thank you if you do🫶

~~~

The stage was electric with energy. Billie singing up at the front with you and the rest of the band near the back, as Billie sang 'Lunch' she kept stealing glances at you with a smirk. You knew what she was doing, especially when she winked at you after singing "I could eat that girl for lunch". You'd nearly fumbled up your chords which Billie noticed. She really tried to not laugh. This was pretty normal for the two of you. There's always been a tension, even the fans had noticed it. And you'd always wondered if it would become more.

It's now been a few shows into the tour, Billie had called you up to the front of the stage to play by her side. It was 'Lunch' again, which seemed to be the song she flirted with you in the most. As she sang, she gestured for you to kneel in front of her. You easily obeyed. Getting down to your knees while you held your guitar; strumming away. She looked down at you with that usual smirk of hers, her hand coming to brush just under your chin. Bending herself down a little closer. The only thing separating you was the mic that touched both your lips. The fans were going insane.

"Baby, I think you were made for me.. somebody write down the recipe." Her voice hit those lower notes, the words she was saying... everything was making your head spin and you fought hard not to kiss her then and there. You didn't even know if she would let you. How you managed to keep eye contact and play you didn't know. She was driving you insane, hitting all the right buttons.

After the show was over and everything that needed to be done was dealt with, Billie found you and practically dragged you to her dressing room. She pinned you up against the door and you gasped out in response," Billie-"

"Shut up and kiss me already." She murmured against your lips and that was all the invitation you needed. You'd kissed her, lips moving against hers as you picked her up. Her legs wrapped around your waist and you'd held her with ease. Billie's tongue slipped past your lips and you parted slightly to give her better access. Your tongues dancing with each other as she moved her hips along you. You moaned into the kiss, adjusting your hold on her and giving her ass a firm squeeze. Making Billie moan. The vibrations from the moan sent shockwaves into your body. You knew you wouldn't be able to hold back now even if you'd wanted to. And neither could Billie.

When the two of you were done, she had curled up in your lap on the chair. Both down a layer of clothing and trying to catch your breathes.

"Fuck..." You murmured.

"Mhm." Billie agreed, looking into your eyes with a grin." Good 'fuck' though, right?"

"Definitely. You have no idea how long I'd wanted that." You told her, taking a couple of breaths between your words.

Her grin became a smirk as she cupped your cheek, giving you another small kiss," oh I can guess. I've been dropping hints for months."

"I thought it was all stage performance stuff." You blushed in embarrassment and she laughed at that. Which made you even more embarrassed.

"You're cute. But I was flirting with you off stage too, idiot." She teased and your blush deepened. Wow you seriously hadn't noticed that.

"So... are we a thing now?" You asked, Billie pretended to think on it. Already knowing her answer.

"Do you want to be?" Billie asked and you nodded. She smiled," then yeah." Her hands came up to grip your bra straps, making your breath hitch as she brought you even closer." now kiss me again."

Safe to say neither of you really slept that night.

The following shows, fans noticed just how much more the tension had grown between you and Billie. No words needed to said between either of you. People knew you were dating. And the stage kiss on the very last show of the tour only confirmed the speculations.

[sinning-23]

Publicity Pt.3

SOOO WE GET SOME TENSION THIS CHAPTER AND Y/n and 2d get a lil FREAKAYYYYY

Warnings: this one gets a lil freaky guys, will they won’t they, dry humping, language, reader isn't confident, tw for low self esteem reader

Word count: a bunch lol

Enjoy~

Link to Publicity Introduction

Link to Publicity Pt.1

Link to Publicity Pt.2

Link to Publicity Pt.4!! UP NOW!

When the offer of help arrose form 2D's lips you were only a pinch hesitant. But hey, unpacking together couldn't be so bad! You're first to crack open the suitcase, a few items spilling out the side.

Whatttt? You can't help being a chronic overpacker.

The first to come out are your pants, shorts, and skirts. Next a couple shirts and tops. The dark-eyed male beside you hesitates to pop open the second suitcase but soon follows your lead, taking things out and pacing them on the bed before you.

Its quiet, only because you can hear Murdoc's voice in your cranium.

"Warming 'er up just to shag huh?"

God the thought of that....didn't really bother you in a bad way. If anything your mind had flooded with imaginary images of the lead singer covered over you, hazy lust-filled gaze drinking you up.

You hadn't forgotten how hot his face had been at the statement and he didn't deny it either, especially since you happened to be yelling at Murdoc.

You glance up at him, his face beet red again, but only because he'd managed to get the suitcase with panties in it.

Jussst perfect.

"AH- Sorry sorry we can switch! You gasp, tugging the soft, frilly, fabric pair away from his sight.

"'M sorry," He apologizes, shuffling to the opposite side here you had originally been.

"What for? You've made this a very comfortable and calming experience for me so, thank you." You hum with a gentle smile

"If anything I should be apologizing to you."

2D shakes his head in response, gently folding your shirts. He's not very good at it but it's the effort and thought counts.

Again with the fuckin silence.

You sigh, setting some clothes out for you to change into, a question popping into your head.

"Beach still on the table? I haven't been to Santa Monica in ages." You grin, leaning forward and catching his eye.

He smiles back, shoving his hands in his pockets.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The sun is still high, warming the two of you as you walk through the crowded California streets. The two of you sport a nice shady pair of sunglasses to somewhat hide your faces and atop 2D's head, a hat to sort of cover that pretty blue hair.

Your heart warms, the feeling of home filling you with content. Its comfortable with 2D. He doesn't pry...or make you feel like an object (like Murdoc).

The conversation ebbs and flows as you walk the pier, the Ferris Wheel catching your eye.

"My dad-"

"My dad-"

You giggle, the both of you speaking at the same time. You gesture for him to speak but he's far more interested in what you have to say...a reoccurring theme.

"Uh, my dad used to take me here sometimes. He said that if I work too hard I'd forget to enjoy the small pleasures life had to offer," You explain, gazing up at the giant wheel, part of you wishing to board it for a spin.

"My dad owned a lil fair. I used to run those for 'im when I was younger. Never really did like the Ferris Wheel." He admits, gazing down at you, but you miss it, too busy staring at the ride you'd spent so many summers on.

"Not a fan of funfairs?" You question, seeing him shrug.

"Eh, growin' up around 'em sort of made the spledor of it all less excitin': He admits, still watching you.

"I get it. It's like, I don't know, having too much of something and then not enjoying it as much cause you have it all the time?" You compare, stopping to lean against the wooden pillars to overlook the ocean.

The sun was setting fast. How long had you two been here just yapping away? He does the same, the space between you not nearly as big as you thought it'd be. Again, he look just as pretty as he did in the car when you were driving fro the airport.

"2D-"

"Stuart. You can call me Stu, love." He corrects, your lip tucking between your teeth as you swallow and nod, testing the name, letting it roll off your tongue.

Fuck this was awfully intimate-

"Thanks for this... And offering to practice in the studio later. It means more than you'll ever know." You hum, taking his hand in yours with gratitude.

His face flushes as he nods, the sunset illuminated your faces in a warm orange as the wave crash against the pier. You're hands are still intertwined, his being colder than yours surprisingly. They fit so perfectly together and you cant help how your hear flutters.

"When you came to my room the other night," He begins, your chest squeezing again, brain short circuiting with the image of him shirtless and leaning against the doorway.

"Y-yeah?" You huff, slowly letting his hand go, his grip only tightening, eyes laser focused on you.

"What did you need?" He questions, the waves crashing down again, the sunset light soon replaced with that of the Ferris Wheel illuminated with a soft pink.

Thinking back on it, you didn't REALLY need pajamas. You could've just made due with the robe and left him alone....but you didn't. You sought him out in hopes he'd be awake despite the awkward altercation prior.

You wanted to see him..hear him...even if it was for something as simple as to borrow a shirt.

But that was inappropriate, that feeling in your stomach. This was supposed to be a quick trip for you collab. Get it over with and go back to being a fuckin loser in your far too expensive flat in New York.

You were fine disappearing for years...not like anyone really cared about the music anyway. You kept yourself close and that's it. The need for anyone else was overruled by a sense of impending doom and self sufficient independence.

Any hookup was simply there for the title of 'Sleeping with a celebrity'. But this....whatever you were feeling for him, that little twist in your gut....

What did you need?

"You..." You begin, forcing the rest of the sentence out even though you wanted nothing more than to leave it as that.

"You were the only one awake., haha. I uh, I was gonna ask for pajamas." You slide your hand away from his, immediately missing the shared warmth.

He falters, lips pressed into a thin line. You'd be better off leaving it at that.

"A-Ah okay. Well, now you have your luggage and uh...thats all solved."

A silence falls over the conversation, the waves much quieter now.

"'S late, we should head back." He states, leading the way through the crowd.

Damn it

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The car ride home was awkward enough, and when you arrived at the house he opened your door and then the front one before completely disappearing upstairs. You curse yourself, knowing that deep down it was your fault if he felt a way. Had you lead him on? No no no...well?

You sigh, plopping onto the couch.

"Whoa, you okay? You guys disappeared for a while we were starting to get worried." Russel starts, sitting beside you as you take a breath and let you head roll against the couch cushion.

"Yeah yeah fine I just..." If you didn't get these feelings out or at least tell someone yo were gonna explode.

"Russel can I tell you something? And I need some honest advice." You begin, turning to face the white eyes male.

He shrugs, giving you full attention.

Damn saying it out loud was a lot harder than beginning to accept the feeling yourself. Saying it out loud was like ACTUALLY admitting and accepting it for all that it was.

"I-I think...fuck I think I'm catching feelings for Stu." You sigh, dragging your hands down your face.

Russel’s eyes widen.

"I haven't even been here for a day and I'm attached! It's so stupid like i just want...i want....him. Its so unprofessional and i cant tell him because, well what if its awkward after?!" You're rambling on and on, eyes watering as you try to explain yourself.

He sits and listens, only nodding in between sentences. When you finish, he waits a moment, glancing up at the stairway then to you.

"Time waits for no one, if you feeling like D should know, and you're ready to accept his feelings, unrequited or not, do it." You pause, standing from the couch with a nod.

This whole thing was stupid. You shuffle to your room, picking out your pajamas before heading to the bathroom down the hall from you room. All you can do is think, peeling your clothes away as the pier interaction plays out in your head.

He looked like he was waiting for something...for you to say the one thing he needed and you didn't. The way his eyes softened and glossed when the word "You"left your lips.

The hot water runs down your shoulders and back, the steam digging the mirror as you sigh in relief. God you needed this after the fiasco that was today and yesterday. Soap suds cover the washcloth and the hold water releases your tension

“Warmin’ her up jus’ to shag huh?”

The thought shoots straight to your core.

Fuck. Ok calm down.

This was just a simple moment of weakness. Thinking about him with his teeth in your neck was NOT healthy.

….

Or thinking about his hands would feel gripping your waist, pulling you against him. To feel him.

Would he call you ‘love’ like how he did before? Or ‘miss’ like he was awaiting your touch, pleading for it. Would he hold your thighs, kissing his way up, obsidian orbs gazing upwards.

“Y/n”

You can hear it clear as day. Pleading and warm, seeping with desire.

“Y/n…”

The tap at the door shocks you out of your stupor.

“U-Uh yeah! Sorry almost done!” You swallow, hearing Stu on the other side.

“Right! Sorry love, uh…if you’d like we can work on some vocals together. Jus’ come up t’ my room. Murdoc don’t like the studio being used late…unless it’s him of course.” He scoffs at the end your heart dropping to your stomach.

H-His room?! At night?! Shit maybe Murdoc was right??? How could you refuse an offer like that, working on one of your favorite things while being with someone you’d grown to like.

“Totally! Thanks! I’ll be out soon.” You call out, panicking as you thoroughly scrub every crease and crevice, suddenly feeling the need to shave.

You lotion your body, silky soft as you toss your flesh pajamas on. With lyric book in hand you trek up the stairs, 2D’s door glowing like a beakon of hope, drawing you in. Taking a deep breath, you use you knuckle to tap against the door.

Deja vu much?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hours go by when you're doing something you love. And right now you're sitting, scribbling lyrics and verses into your sketchbook while 2D does the same, sometimes letting his written words roll off his tongue so melodically.

You don't trust your voice though, only humming to yourself or talking in your head. There's music in the background, songs that stemmed from your conversation at the beginning.

"We need something cunty." You explain, pacing back and forth as 2D raises a brow.

"Pardon?" He yelps, your statement coming out more agressive and and with further explanation.

"No, no listen! The girls want sexy dancing slow jam party music? We gotta try and have the perfect balance of all of that. Think uhhh early 2000's-ish? I don't know Nelly Furtado? Nine Inch Nails?"

His face is blooming with red as he nods with furrowed brow.

SO, here you were, with the sounds of Brittney Spears, Rihanna, and Pussycat Dolls filling the owls room as you worked.

"Ok ok here's a lil something I got so far! Think this would sound good with some drums like uhhh damn it." You snap your fingers, trying to remember.

"Paper soldier! Ever heard paper soldier?" You gasp, finding the perfect example of the sound you wanted.

Pressing play you guage his reaction as you. He's focuses, listening to everything the sign has to offer.

"You get the idea right? Its like, slow but kinda hot sounding? I don't know." You sigh, rubbing your temples.

"No No i get it! We want something like that for the collab righ'? This is more your caliber though, " He admits, running a hand through his hair, his shirt lifting a bit when he did.

"Oh here's another one!" You think, switching the song and keeping eye contact with him once it starts.

However, you immediately look away when the first verse hits.

I wanna fuck you slow with the light on

"OKAYYY lets just skip this part haha! What I wanted you to hear was uh... the uh..." You fumbling with he phone now, his pitch black orbs trained on you, face flush as your chest rise and falls at a quickened pace.

You said you're going through a phase, keeping your heart safe

Your bodies are closer now, your once criss crossed postilion on his bed changing to where you're seated on your knees, his legs on either side of you. Your palm presses against the mattress as he leans forward, one slow an testy hand crawling its way up the small of your back.

I can't lose you babe, I can't lose you babe

"This is the part I was talking about...the...the instrumental." You're breathless, your faces somehow closer than you remembered.

Your heart races as your lips chase his, mouths finally working in unison. He's got you by the base of your neck, your body crawling forward as your combined tangle of limbs finally fold into a comfortable position with you straddling his waist, one of his hands on your hip as he pulls you forward.

A gasp pulls from your throat and that's where he moves his attention too. Hot, searing kisses trail down your neck.

"Is this okay? Am I makin' you feel good love?" He asks, your mind so fogged up all you can do it nod and cling to his shirt with every slight upward roll of his hips.

It's almost too much, the fabric keeping you from feeling him completely. But damn it if you can't feel that fuckin monster in his sweatpants.

He rolls up again, your forehead falling onto his shoulder.

"D, please. I...fuck." You huff, grinding down onto him again as he whines in your ear.

It’s much deeper than you had previously imagined, a pleasant surprise really. Still attached to your neck, you can feel him suction onto you, his fingers sliding up your shirt to cup your chest.

He’s definitely not inexperienced that’s for sure, because he’s got his hands and thumbs moving in nice little circles, giving each of your boobs an equal about of attention. Sure enough the shirt lifts and he grinds up into you again, his lips capturing the sounds that leave your own.

“That’s it, look at how pretty you are love?” He smiles, turning your head so you can look at the thin mirror planted against his wall. You get the perfect view of yourself and the hickeys forming over your skin.

Though,

The longer you stare…the worse you feel. The image of your body in the mirror making you cringe. The curves and crevices. The blemished and birthmarks. You swallow hard, tearing your gaze away.

You came here to write a song and now you were fucking it up again. He probably thinks youre trying to use him for sex....was he doint the same???

With a heavy sigh you squeeze your eyes shut and guide his wrists away.

“I-I’m sorry. You invited me here to help me practice and write and I’m not… we shouldn’t.” You swallow, seeing his face falter.

Damn it breaks your heart

Had he done something wrong? Were you regretting what had happened so far. You’re already gathering your things faster than he can stop you and ask what was wrong.

You did this earlier too.

Was he pursuing something unattainable? Was he not being forewarned enough? No that’s not it, inviting someone to your room this late at night was definitely forward.

“S’alrigh’, I understand.” He hums. Shifting a bit so you’re bodies are no longer intertwined.

There you are, disheveled and trying to carry to much at once. He hesitated to touch you at first but then lifts the spaghetti strap of your take top right over your shoulder, taking caution to not touch your skin.

“Thank you. I hope we can come up with something by tomorrow. Goodnight.” You state, eyes hazy with tears as you avoid his gaze.

He only nods, opening his door for you. There’s a hesitant and awkward air as you shuffle out. There trek down the stairs is far from comfortable as your fight the urge to look back at him.

You know he’s standing in the doorway, probably fidgeting with the hem of his shirt.

Upon entering your room and resting your head against the pillow, sleep doesn’t come easy.

It takes longer this time but you can faintly hear 2D's door close.

A/N: Ouhhhh a little angsty this partttt. I'm glad you guys are enjoying and next chapterrr lets see what happens when rehearsals take a turn for the final time. Murdoc ain't too happy ab you and the lead singer, despite there...not being anything happening ahahahah right?!

[rei-ismyname]

EXCEPTIONAL X-MEN #3 FTA

After a pretty disappointing week of X-Men comics it's a delight to read and analyse Eve Ewing's Exceptional X-Men. The repeated issues I have with the other titles are just not present here and after three consistent bangers Ewing and co have my trust.

Emma is right

We pick up exactly where issue #2 left off, and this opening scene of all the main characters makes me realise how tightly the execution is. We know where each of them is at and (at least broadly what they want) - we're getting to know the kids organically. Where the other two books feel like action figures isolated from each other for no good reason, Kate Pryde's need to get away from the X-Men was established before the title even began. She just wants a normal life, to date girls and process her trauma. Emma Frost showing up to answer the call she refused throws her off immediately and they briefly scrap. The kids aren't just saying nothing because they didn't get a script today (hi Jubilee) - they're frozen by Emma. It's a small thing, but it's purposeful and flows elegantly.

Priti, Kate's housemate/friend from school, breaks up the fight for the most relatable reason - she doesn't want to lose the security deposit. Perhaps a sign that Kate doesn't fit into the 'norma'l world as much as she wants...or Emma just really knows how to push her buttons. I think Emma is hurting too, though she hides it under her usual scene-stealing exterior. I can't wait for more of their dynamic. Yeah, they'll almost certainly figure out a working relationship but their pain isn't being dismissed either. I feel like the pair are a successful version of what Gail Simone is doing with Rogue.

They stop fighting and have a little tea party, then Axo asks the question I'd been dreading the answer to - 'do you trust Emma or not?' Kate grew up being terrified of Emma with good reason and never let her forget why she did not trust her. Emma spent decades earning that trust and proving herself a hero, leader and teacher - but the First Krakoan Age had them grow closer than ever before. They worked well together and became friends, they were a force for good on Krakoa (mostly.) It's a shame that this is a metric, but two thumbs up for not rolling any of that back. These feel like the members of the resistance who were there for each other in Fall of X. Kate herself is regressing a little, but it's believable as a trauma response.

Kate doesn't want to train young mutants and Emma does. Prito even has a space they can use and the kids are keen! Everyone is happy then, right? Well, I think that's going to be the core tension for a while. Everyone except Kate wants this, but I think Kate needs this.

This 'getting to know you' circle does a lot of work in centering the young mutants, reminding us they're here to stay while showing us who they are and the beginning of their social dynamic. I haven't been a teen for a long time but their voices sound authentic, even to the point of highlighting that Bronze/Trista is a bit younger than the other two.

Agreed, do not read the comments.

They want to be doing this! One of the most challenging parts of being a teen is navigating peer groups. Solidarity in experiencing the same kind of otherness plus scary body changes is healthy, and it's lovely to chalk up a W despite the fact that 'people hate us.'

This issue also asks the question Rogue did in Uncanny #1, but as organic dialectic. It introduces the tension between self defense and being a superhero when you have powers - the difference between Emma and Kate externalised. Kate is excited despite herself until Emma shows up with costumes, and I think she's right to push back or at least be wary. But is this about her or the kids? It's not the most admirable contradiction but it's very human. They're both right that the old ways were flawed and they need to try something new.

Is she talking about Colossus? MF is not that gentle. Their costumes look amazing.

Unsurprisingly, Emma and Kate are a great team. There's tension underneath there, but they wouldn't be doing this if their friendship didn't run deep. New kids in relaunches past have often had their powers explained by Cerebro or a nosy telepath. Learning about it from their mouths as they're starting to use them in a controlled environment achieves the wiki entry, shows them learning to use them, and importantly gives us more of their personality.

Emma conjures up some Brood-like baddies and everyone freaks out but some growth is evident. It's Axo that figures out they're not real. Kate is not impressed. I doubt they'll throw down, but her sending the kids away feels like an extreme reaction. Good, she's got shit to say and hurts that need to be spoken. The kids don't leave, but we're left with all this tension in the air to be resolved next issue.

I LOVE that the three kids cuddle/huddle in the background.

Who better to break the ice (sorry) than Bobby Drake? Having him just fly in the window and cooling down the tension (sorry again) could feel random and silly but it works. These two have a lot of history and it makes sense that he'd seek her out. Kate has been turning her back on anyone X-related - will she freeze Bobby out too? The kids are awed by him and it's half the Marauders back together, so I don't think he'll get the cold shoulder.

I feel very confident in calling Exceptional X-Men the best X-Men book in From The Ashes. It's got an honesty and sincerity to it while remixing the hits of first arcs and adding plenty of new. The art style is colourful and emotive which adds so much to a book taking people's feelings seriously. If you pick up nothing else, this is the one.

[gremlin-girly]

Kinktober 19

Kinks: Praise/breeding

The Perfect Jotunn Bride Part 2

Tags/warnings: SMUT, macrophilia (bc he's still a giant), overstimulation, vaginal fingering, p in v, creampie, breeding kink, no beta, Loki (he's a warning), slight dub con, praise (good girl), Spitting, monster fucking (ig), monster cock, stomach bulge, multiple orgasm,

My warnings are non-exhaustive and likely I've missed some, please read at your own risk. And Minors do not interact!!

Summary: Following the night of your husband’s return, Loki finds your notes on the Jotun language and introduces you to a new way of studying.

Word count: 1.9k

A/N: did I only have 5 hours sleep and got back from work two hours ago? Yes. Did my phone post a fic I'm working on before it was ready again? Also yes. I'm very tired... so the mistakes are aplenty (probably). I'll fix them later (probably).

Translations are at the end! I used this little website so I apologise in advance if there are mistakes! Banners by @/cafekitsune

Part 1 | Part 2 (you're here!)

Prev | Next | Masterlist

Loki was awake before sunrise. The memories of the night before flitted in and out of his brain as he held your small form in his arms. You looked peaceful in this state; a welcome change from the worried, fearful or angry looks you usually sported.

Loki did consider pulling you tighter to him but didn't want to risk stirring you from your slumber, knowing you would likely be in a foul mood after the events of last night. His ruby eyes flitted to the corset in tatters next to the bed, making a mental note to get another that would fit a little better and look as equally beautiful.

After half an hour, he removed himself from you with a sigh, careful to keep from waking you. He'd not had chance to investigate you what you'd been working on and, after setting the fire alight, he reached for the nearest notebook you had left strewn on the floor, flicking through the pages.

Some of the script is random notes but other parts are words and phrases in Jotun, with colourful translations in Asgardian next time them. An unfamiliar warmth blossoms in Loki’s chest as he looks between your dreaming form and your notes, but a wicked smirk quickly appears as his plans for the morning change.

Loki treads back to the bed, re-taking his place next to you, discarding your notebook lazily to drape his arm over your waist.

“Wife,” Loki punctuates the word with a nuzzle into your neck, making you stir. Your eyes flutter and then you blink a few times, brows furrowing as you wake. Memories of the previous night crash through your brain and your eyes fly open fully, face flushing as you look over to your husband lying beside you with a mischevious gleam in his red eyes.

“Wife," He says again, voice low. "Have you been trying to learn Jotun?"

You attempt to gather the bed sheets around you, swamping yourself in warmth amd protection, but Loki’s giant cold arm prevents it. He instead looks down at you, waiting patiently for your response. Slowly, you nod your head.

"You know I can help teach you.” Loki murmurs into your ear. "And I can make it fun."

Your head tilts back slightly, eyes wide and Loki drinks in the sight. Your chest is heaving under the covers and your face is bright red at the thought of what fun Loki could possibly have in mind for you.

"Loki," You breathe. "Last night-"

"You were exquisite, wife." Loki’s eyes bore into yours and you feel as if you're shrinking, however, your body betrays you by making heat pool between your thighs at his praise. "And I want more. Especially now, knowing you've been learning my tongue."

“You’re so busy – I couldn’t ask you to-“

“We can start right now,” he purrs, his large hand tugging away the covers, exposing your naked form. Loki's tongue drags across his lips, and you remember just how well he'd teased you with it the night before and you shiver. "I'd forgo any amount of royal duties if it meant being buried in your sweet cunt."

You can't stop the short gasp that bubbles out of your throat and your eyes widen. You heart is running circuits, blood rushing heat everywhere. Loki’s words leave you skin like gooseflesh, your nipples pebbling at the thought despite your thoughts of him. You didn't even want to think of the way your pussy throbbed.

Loki seems to enjoy the sight before him, knowing you want more of last night's activities and knowing the effect his words have on your delicate Asgardian body. He runs his hand upwards to cup at one of your breasts rolling and tweaking at your nipple gently and you fight back moans.

"Does my wife like that idea?" He taunts in a whisper. "Being split open by your husband? You already wear my mark."

His chilled thumb runs over the love bite he'd left on the top of your breast the night before and he eyes it proudly. His eyes flicker to yours for a moment before he presses his face against yours, the heat of your skin warming his own.

Your own small hands inch up his strong arm that's holding you down, eyes quietly pleading but for what you weren't sure.

"Loki." You murmur to him as he nips at the sensitive skin on your neck.

“I’m going to say things to you in your Asgardian tongue and you will repeat it in Jotun for me.” Loki’s tone doesn't leave any room for argument and your chest heaves with a mixture of nerves and excitement. "Each correct answer will be rewarded.”

You press your legs together as another wave of heat flushes through you and try to look anywhere but at Loki as your cheeks redden with sudden shyness. Loki smirks and trails kisses along your shoulder and chest.

"Isn't that a good idea?" Loki lips gently kiss over your breasts, his cold tongue licking playfully at your pebbled nipples. “Don’t worry, we will start easy.”

Easy was numbers. Loki held you close to his side  to murmur numbers to you in Asgardian, ensuring you couldn’t move away. His free hand trailed over your body softly, at first.  After each answer he would shower you with praises, often giving piece of soft, warm flesh a squeeze before continuing to trail your sides again. Each time he’d squeeze, you found yourself making small noises, and by the time you had reached the number ten, you found yourself agreeing that this was  a far better way to learn than through children's books and notes.

When you reached fifteen, Loki’s fingers trailed down to your sex and tapped your clit, making you jolt in his arms. He continued to draw small, tight circles around the bundle of nerves to ensure you continued to whimper and grow more and more pliant.

“Good girl,” he cooed, kissing the top of your hair. “Isn’t this nice? Being rewarded for your good behaviour? Smart little wife.”

You can feel the dampness leaking from your core as Loki works his ministrations on your clit and you mewl into his shoulder, gripping his arm so hard your fingers ached. The brashness of your own sounds make you flood with shyness and shame. You were loving all of this newfound attention from Loki, even if you knew you shouldn't be.

When you reached twenty you were red faced and panting into Loki’s chest. He'd been horrifically slow saying the numbers, prolonging his torture of your clit. He knew exactly how to draw you to the edge and keep you there, before giving you moments of respite before bringing you right back to that edge. You were beginning to see stars and your pussy ached around nothing. You'd considered begging for his fingers, begging for some relief, but when your half-lidded, lust-glistened eyes met his you knew you'd get something far better than his fingers.

 "You've done so well for me, smăr einn." Loki says shifting to cage you against the mattress with his arms. His knees push your legs apart with ease and you gasp loudly when you feel the tip of his cock brush along your inner thigh. "Are you ready for your reward?"

When you nod Loki says dramatically. "Words, wife. Use your words." He sits back on his haunches and your eyes grow wide at the massive length standing tall between his legs. You swallow thickly, wondering how he'd manage to squeeze in to you... and your cunt flutters at the thought. Loki smirks down at you, pumping his cock a few times and then spitting onto your sensitive clit. "You know how much I like to hear you beg. Let me hear you say how much you want your husband."

Your voice dies in your throat when Loki runs the head of his thick cock from your spit covered clit, all the way down to your wet hole. He nudges it testingly with a curious look and you squeak a gasp. Your pussy flutters again and you can't think of anything else other than him being inside you.

"Come on wife," Loki teases with an edge of impatience. He taps his cock against your clit, watching you writhe beneath him in pleasure. "Imagaine how good it'll feel being full of my cum."

"Líka!" You cry out in Jotun, surprising both you and Loki; whose heart thuds harder in his chest. "Líka maðr!"

"Fast, wif." Loki huffs, rolling his hips slowly into yours. Your mouth is an open scream as Loki pushes into your tight hole, your pussy immediately constricting around his cock. Loki sighs, reaching a hand to toy with your clit again. You jerk at the sensation, his cool skin against your scorching heat never ceases to make your pussy wet.

You whimper as Loki’s cock finally reaches its hilt and Loki makes a loud, gravelly groan.

"Look at how well you take me," Loki urges, his voice breathless. His other hand goes to knead your breasts and your eyes flutter, glancing down. Loki’s hips are slotted between yours, his cock buried inside you as promised, but above where his hand rolls your clit, there's an obvious bulge.

Your pussy spasms at the sight, and Loki grins down at you, slowly moving his hips backwards and then forwards, allowing you to adjust to his size.

"Loki." You keen, heaving breaths beneath him. "I- fuck."

Loki huffs a chuckle, dragging his cock out before plunging back into your pussy. He'd been correct before, he'd gladly avoid royal duties to have you splayed out like this on his cock. You curse louder than before, almost screaming and gripping the covers beside you; Loki would have been concerned if your legs didn't spread wider and your cunt didn't gush the way it did over his cock. Spurred on to move faster, Loki picks up the pace, continuing to lavish your breasts and clit with attention that makes your eyes roll.

"You're doing so well," Loki pants. "Such a good girl for your husband. I can't wait to see my seed drip from your pretty little cunt."

Your walls clench down around Loki and he curses. He moves his arms forwards, interlacing his fingers with yours before leaning down, pressing you into the bed as he fucks into you.

"My wife," Loki growls into your neck. You're a moaning mess under him, but you manage to turn your face towards his; your lips kissing haphazardly until you find his lips. Loki’s hips stutter and his moan is smothered by your lips - the first true kiss you'd given him unprompted, unlike the forced kisses he'd managed to manipulate from you at your wedding or for social aspect but a real, genuine kiss.

"My husband," you whisper hoarsely back, breath hitching three octaves as another orgasm crashes through your body. "Loki!"

Loki grunts, his fingers almost crushing yours as your pussy to squeeze him tight and he pumps you full of his cream.

You're completely fucked out and breathless, your eyes flutter when you feel a cool hand against your flushed cheek turn your head and your heart stammers when Loki presses a sweet kiss against your lips.

"You were amazing," he whispers, brushing away hair that's stuck to your sweat-sheened face. "I think we should study a few times each day."

You give him a lopsided, cock-drunk grin; the first genuine smile you'd ever given him. "That sounds good to me."

---

Translations:

Smăr einn - Little One

Líka - Please

Maðr - husband

fast - certainly

[ssivinee]

✧Expert Level✧

Part 1 | Part 2

*Part 2 of "New Game, New Player," so I suggest you read Part 1 first!*

BEBE!Bada Lee x Dancer! F Reader: Jeon Y/n and Bada fall for each other, finding comfort in the latter. Bada never knew how to react around you but kept a strong facade. Yet that comes crumbling down as days go by and you slowly become each other's person.

Word count: 5.8k

Note: This took so long... my hands need a dam break from typing. ALSO VERY MUCH NOT PROOFREAD I GOT TOO EXCITED TO POST THIS.

Character Vision Board

You shouldn't have expected anything less from the leader of Bebe. The deal was to win 2 more battles for a date, which she did just that. She had two matches exactly, one against Redlic of Mannequeen and the other against Gooseul of DeepNDap.

On the other hand, you didn't have any further battles. Other crews were targeting the other members instead. It made you laugh at their face each time Lyn, Heaven, Enyo, and Aria showed out. They shouldn't have questioned the capabilities of your team in the first place. The team was winning more than you can count on one hand, and it made you proud.

When filming ended, Aesthete was all in their room, preparing to leave. As you go to the neighboring room, your duffel bag rests on your shoulders. The team full of youngsters heard a subtle knock on their door. Aware of who it is, Bada opens the door, revealing the other tall dancer.

"So you ready for that dinner?" You ask, leaning on the door frame. She hands you her phone, "Let's switch numbers, and you send me the details," you nod, complying with her wishes. "I'll see you later," you wave off, and she bows in response as your team follows behind you. She turned around, shutting the light blue door, and all her teammates began squealing.

"Wha~ It's really happening," Soweon swoons over the interaction. "Never thought I'd see the day THE Jeon Y/n is hitting on you, unnie," Lusher adds, and all her teammates nod. "The girl who everyone is in love with asked you on a date. I don't know if I should be happy or jealous of you?" Minah jokes at her leader.

"I wonder where she's gonna take you?" Kyma asks, and Bada feels their comments and questions coming at rapid fire. "How bout I go on the dinner first, then I'll let you guys know," she says teasingly, groans filling the room at her sarcasm.

"You're telling us you're not one bit excited for your date?" Cheche wonders, and Bada's face goes red in shame.

"I didn't say that," was all she could say before her crew jumped like little bunnies around her. "This is so exciting for you, unnie," Lusher tells her, and Bada leans her head back, trying to save herself from embarrassment by looking at the ceiling.

"Let's just go home," she grumbles, but their teasing doesn't stop.

"So you can get ready for your date?"

"Will you guys shut up!"

Bada was now at her apartment, readying herself for the next few hours. She had just gotten out of the shower, and her phone notified her about a message.

Y/n❣️ You good in an hour?

Bada was now alarmed, looking at the time. It was only 6 p.m., but she was agitated, knowing she was nowhere near ready.

Ocean🩵 I don't even know what to wear?????

Y/n❣️ Something fancy

Bada replies sure, connecting her address to the message, and scurries through her closet. Fancy? All Bada saw in her closet was her array of baggy clothing. That was until she was nearing the other side of her closet, catching the sight of a handful of dresses. She decided to wear a black velvet bodycon dress that hugged every curve of her body, then topped it with an off-white light cardigan and some sandals.

Time went by, and she heard the doorbell of her place ring. Bada rushes over to her door, fixing up her oreo hair that was now up in a ponytail before opening the door to see you.

Her eyes grow wide at the view of your apparel. Your hair was in a low bun, showing off the chains you wore. Your suit made you look like you had legs for days, and your boots added an inch to your height.

You made Bada breathless.

You reveal the flowers that hide behind your back, giving them to her with a broad smile as you look her up and down, enjoying the sight. Her usual style had gone out the window, and what stood before you was a feminine beauty who looked divine in the sleek dress.

"You look gorgeous, Bada." You tell her softly, and the latter is trying to take everything in all at once. Your perfume filled her nose, and she smiled at you, "I could say the same thing about you."

"Well, are you ready to go?" She only nods, clutching her bag as she takes your hand. Your eyebrow raises at the touch, but you grasp her hand tighter, loving the warmth it gives you. You take her to your car, open the passenger side, and she thanks you. Making your way to the driver's side, you make your way to a fancy restaurant, and Bada marvels at the building. "Isn't it expensive here?"

"The prices don't matter, Bada. I asked you to come with me. So don't worry about anything." You tell her as you help her exit the car. She wraps her arm around yours, taking in her surroundings. When the two of you enter, her grip becomes tighter, and you look at her. Unable to hold the smile you had, her eyes were roaming around like a lost child.

You go to the host and ask for a table for two. The duo was seated, and you immediately asked for some cider, something light since you still had to drive home. The two of you reading up on the menu and picking out some meals. "Are you sure about this Y/n? The prices are actually crazy."

You grab her hand from across the table, looking at her earnestly, "I told you not to worry about it, Bada." Her heart quickened at the tone of your voice, just nodding.

The two of you drank the alcoholic beverages and started to chat. "I guess I'm your top student now, huh?" Bada jokes, getting an airy chuckle out of you. "Well, you're gonna have to prove it." Her face goes puzzled. "And how would I do that?"

You lean your body forward and whisper, "You just have to be a good girl. You can do that for me, right?" Bada's face was now painted red, her body heating up at the choice of words. She obediently nods, and you let out another chuckle, amused by the reactions she gave you. The world knew her as the confident, tall dancer, but to you, she was a beautiful woman crumbling under your gaze.

"So~ Working as an in-house choreographer under SM?" You try and make conversation. As much as you liked teasing her, you genuinely wanted to get to know her. "Yeah," she says with a tight-lipped smile. "Can I ask how that happened?"

"Uhm, YoungJ oppa had been working with NCT, and he introduced me to Kai first. I guess he liked my dancing so much that he kept asking me to work on the pieces with him." You nod, knowing how Kai was when meeting him while hanging out with BTS Jimin at one point. "I noticed he really does hand-pick the dancers he wants."

"What about you and HYBE?" You sigh at her question, and her brows furrow at your reaction. "I got in due to Bang Si-hyuk's request."

She looks at you weirdly, "Then what's with the reaction?"

"Cause everyone thinks it's cause of Jungkook-oppa." You quickly say, and she nods in understanding. "I started working with TXT first, just so people wouldn't say anything. I even did my best to avoid any project with him, but I couldn't avoid doing RunBTS."

"Why is that?"

"Cause oppa and his members personally asked me," you tell her, but truthfully, they all bombarded your phone and visited your place until you'd accepted. "Do you enjoy it? Being under HYBE?"

"Of course I do. What I hate is all the words being thrown around with it. It's a blessing and a curse," you admit, head hanging low. You hated talking about it in a pessimistic way, but it was something that would be looming over your head for years to come. "Never mind that. How about we talk about that class we agreed on?" Bada grins at your words, "What do you have in mind?"

"A duo dance," you say instantly, and Bada's eyebrows rise. "To what song?" That's when you shrugged. "Whose your favorite artist? We can do a song from them," you suggest.

"It's Vedo," she answers simply, but you laugh, "I should've assumed."

"What does that even mean?"

"Do you know how many videos I've seen of you dancing to his music?" She goes shy, looking away at the question. Your food then arrives, and the two of you get to eat.

"What about this one?" Bada points at the tattoo on your collarbone. The two of you talked about all the ink on your body. You mainly explained that you just loved the look of it, but some did have meaning to it.

The tattoo she gestures to is a rose intertwined with the words, 'Your only limit is you.' You smiled just thinking of the words, "It's just my daily reminder," you joke. "In all seriousness, though, it just reminds me that I shouldn't stop getting what I want, no matter the cost."

You pause before looking dead in her eyes, "Like getting you."

Her mouth goes slightly ajar at your words. She wasn't sure if she loved or hated you for making her feel completely different. THE Bada Lee was having a hard time with someone for once, and she didn't know how to handle it.

The dinner continues to go smoothly, and you suggest going for a walk on the beach. To your dismay, Bada agrees, and you two are now taking a stroll. You lent her your coat, making sure she wouldn't freeze, and the soft sand buried your feet as the cold breeze of the ocean waves over the two of you.

Hand-in-hand, your arms swayed with each other while listening to the sounds of the crashing waves. "Bada, what do you see in your future?" You ask suddenly, and Bada thinks, unable to respond quickly. "I see a dance studio in my name, with Bebe still by my side and a loving partner who would do anything for me."

"That's a very leader-like answer," You smile at her, "How about you?"

"I don't know yet," you go deep into thought. "I just want to be happy. I guess I just like living in the now." You tell while rubbing the back of your neck. "I do want Aesthete to still be together. They brought me a new sense of life," Bada stared at you as you talked about your team in admiration. Bada saw a glimmer in your eye for the first time, maybe the longing of wanting something you could keep forever.

You chatted more about work, dance, family, and friends before realizing how late it was getting. So you drop her back home, walking her back to her apartment door. "I had a good time," she says faintly, and you kiss the back of her hand. Bada was entirely surprised by your gentlewomanly tendencies, "I'm glad, truly." She couldn't look you in the eye, looking at your hand instead. "About that class... wanna make it happen? With Bebe and Aesthete?" You ask. Bada looks at you, "You were being serious? I mean, I'd love to. It would be fun."

"I'll make it happen, Bada. I promise."

The next day, the class mission had just been announced, and it got everyone busy. Your teammates were around the building, finding a quiet place to start working.

You decided to offer to listen to 'Smoke' with Bada in the large dance studio the Street Woman Fighter building had. The two of you stood in the room, listening intently to the song's beats, rhythm, and lyrics. Most of the time, Bada observed you as your body moved quickly, instantly becoming familiar with the music. It was watching your true form at work, and she loved every moment of it.

Bada commended you in her head. Dance just came so quickly to you. It should be that way, but she couldn't fathom the amount of style you used in one go. You were like an oiled machine with much information stored in your brain. While doing that, you went in and out of the room, explaining to Bada that you were just helping and checking up on your girls.

As you repeat some of your moves, trying to find the perfect ones, Bada joins you. Unlike you, she just used the beat and lyrics instead. Occasionally, your brain starts picking up the movements she connected together. You watch as she starts from the beginning. She isolated her neck as she sauntered, mimicking the lyrics, "Light it up."

She flicks up her hand, imitating a working lighter, and you hype her up a little. Your cheers and sickening facial expressions gave her more confidence to use massive power. Despite being technical rivals, you weren't afraid to admit how cool her movements were. You take a break at some point, and she watches as she pieces the second half of the choreography. By the end, you were clapping for her with a proud smile as if she had just won an award. "Your brain works wonders, I tell you." You pat her butt, and she tackles you. Your arms go around her waist, making sure you find your balance. "You ready for this?"

"I think I am," she answers you with a smile, and the two of you head down to the fight zone, seeing all the leaders already there, and sit next to each other.

All you could say as people took turns, they were harsh.

It was soon Bada's turn, and you look at her. Bada tended to bite her lip when she got nervous, and you realized how much she did it throughout every dance a leader presented. While paying attention to everyone's words, your hand makes its way onto her lap, and you clasp your hands on hers as your thumb rubs the back of her hands, calming her down.

When it's Bada's turn, you give her a thumbs up as she stands there. She begins, and everyone finds her choreography the coolest and most doable.

"It looks the coolest. I want to do a dance that can prove our abilities as dancers."

"The groove of it is nice. I wouldn't mind using this piece."

"Isn't this harder to steal?" You look over to the owner of the voice, Mina Myoung. "If we try out for this dance, we have a higher chance of losing." Bada only nods at her words, understanding the thought she took into consideration. Yet, you didn't get it. You wanted so badly to defend Bada.

All of you were dancers and professionals at that. It was your job, and if you didn't have the confidence to do it, maybe it wasn't suitable for you. You held back your tongue, knowing it wasn't your place to talk.

It was then your turn to show out, and you got up to the walkway, showing the powerful yet sleek dance you had prepared. Everyone expresses how they liked the route you took and how cool it made you feel, but on the technicality side, it had aspects of popping and locking with some commercial sprinkled in there that looked difficult to pull off, which makes you nod in understanding.

"Doing this dance would be great. The lines are clean, and it looked empowering."

Kristen smiles at you, "Dude, you're insane. The stylistic choices, the rhythm your body used? I wanna learn it." Yet you hit the same wall Bada does.

"The technicality of it, though, it's not something many of us can't do."

"As cool as the dance is, this choreography is much more in your favor."

That's just when you had to say, "As leaders, we should all be able to dance something at a high level due to our years of experience. We come here not only to show our dance but our leadership to people." Your words simmer in many of their minds, knowing you weren't wrong.

The voting began, and it was a close call between yours, Bada's, and Akanens. The leaders decided to come back and group up later when there was more thought in their choices. When coming back, Bada's dance wins against yours 5 to 2. You were satisfied, though. In fact, you were joyed. You shake her shoulders, congratulating the girl, "You're just too good." And she hugs you in happiness, squeezing hard around your shoulders.

You tell your team, and you are pleased with the outcome. You just knew how trendy the choreography looked and how everyone would be dancing to it when the episode was released.

Now, the leaders were back in the Fight Zone, where Bada prepared to teach the choreography. You decide to stay beside Kristen and give her a fist bump. Bada begins, and as she teaches everyone, the Aesthete and Jam Republic leaders' voices can be heard.

"You really do move those hips like water, Kris," you tell her as you pat the shorters hips, and she giggles. "Says you."

"I mean you over here using so much space and extending your moves. You're making my muscles tense over here." You say, and she hits you jokingly. These interactions happened often throughout the session.

Bada's gaze kept looking at the two of you with much distaste. Your focus should've been on her and her only. This causes her mood to sour, and she targets you gradually during the rehearsal.

"Y/n, you didn't move your chest during the walk."

"No no, that's wrong, your angles are too small."

"Jeon Y/n, are you even paying attention."

You were taken aback by her quick flip in emotions. What the fuck is happening right now?

You couldn't understand what went wrong. Every move was correctly done, down to the facial expression and vibe. As you made friends with the other leaders, you realized it had worsened. Bada was scoffing and giving you death glares every moment she could.

During your break, Bada strays away to the Bebe hideout, and you follow her. You enter the room without warning, making Bada whip her head at the door's sudden opening.

"What is your problem right now, Bada?" You ask, a sound of hurt layered underneath. "I've been doing everything properly?" Your statement sounded more like a question. Throughout the hours, you began doubting if you did anything right but were honestly trying your hardest. So why were you getting shunned for it?

When Bada hears your pain, she beats herself up mentally. She couldn't help but be jealous when she had no right to. "I'm sorry," she huffs, and you sit beside her. "What is it, Bada? What have I done?" You ask with caution, and Bada can't meet your eyes.

"I don't like how close you are with Kristen." She mumbles, and your eyes widen. That was the issue? You chuckle at the girl, and she looks at you with large eyes, "It's not funny," she says, whining. You found it endearing, squishing her face.

She discreetly yearned for your attention the entire time.

Bada was bitter about the attention you gave others and couldn't comprehend why since it was her dance and she was teaching it. "You do know I'm only interested in you, right?" You state the obvious, but Bada's heart flutters. Your arm wraps around her shoulder, "Come on, it's time for the main dancer auditions."

You two head down, and everyone notices the two of you together, which causes every team to tease you two. Bada sat down with her team, hiding her face as she tucked her knees into her chest. You loved it, though. People would now aware of the situation between you two, and you believed it would reassure Bada.

"Dang unnie, it's only been two days, and you guys are that close?" Lyn teases. "They seemed more than close. Are you guys dating yet?" Heaven asks, and you just hushed them. "Auditions are starting, please focus."

That they did, but as time passed, none of your girls made it as main dancers. You were still proud since they had all made it to the second round of reauditions. They were the biggest competitors in each class.

It was time for the leaders, and Bada's group was up first. You stood behind them while marking your movements beside Kristen. After your chat with Bada, you made it your mission to dance all out, proving that you were paying attention and that she was your number one priority. Bada's group goes first, and no one saw anyone else but Bada on that stage. She was like a bright candle standing taller above the rest, unwilling to give out. During the hip roll, you bite your lip. God, is she so sexy. You then quickly erased your thoughts when it was your turn.

As you begin, you walk up, and everyone's attention is on you and Kristen. You let the music fully control your body, and Bada watches the two of you with hawk eyes. She wouldn't openly admit it, but she wanted to keep you and Kristen in check. She liked you but also wanted to carry the tradition of holding the main dancer. The way the two of you dance made her nervous. You two filled the stage and danced like no one else was around.

The judges have a hard time choosing, so they make you reaudition. "For the reaudition, we want Tsubakill's Akanen, Aesthete's Jeon Y/n, Jam Republic's Kristen, and Bebe's Bade Lee."

You and Akanen were up first, and you were holding your ground. You knew the advantages you had in this. The stature of your body was similar to Bada's, but you had more muscles, and you knew you could copy Bada's movements to the tea. Once you end, the two dancers switch with Bada and Akanen. You watched, pleased at the two and their difference in styles. Kristen made sure to use the entire stage and show her flexibility while doing certain moves, while Bada showed much more attitude than usual. It felt captivating yet exhilarating to watch, and you got excited

The four of you stood on the stage, and you smiled hearing Shonwu's words. "We have another reaudition. It's Bebe's Bada Lee and Aesthete's Jeon Y/n." You wink at Bada, who smirks at you, feeling the adrenaline coursing through your veins.

You were grinning ear to ear and stood beside each other on stage. Once the music begins, the two of you turn to serious mode. You guys danced similarly, and everyone realized how difficult the choice would be. It was identical, almost as if you mirrored each other’s movement. It looked like Bada took over your body while you took over hers.

When you finish, you see the looks of disdain on the judge's faces, making you chuckle quietly. They talked for 5 minutes, but it felt like an eternity until Monika announced Bada had won the position.

The taller brings you into a relieved hug. You mumble how amazing she is, so she kisses you on the cheek. You were amazed by Bada, not because she beat you, but because she carried such humbleness. She held you close, and you wonder if she was so scared of not meeting everyone's expectations.

But she knew she lived up to yours.

After 3 days of waiting, today was the day you all had to film for the video. You sat in the makeup chair, feeling the black mascara almost smeared on your face's temple area. You open your eyes, looking around at the other leaders. Their makeup was a mess, making you all look like you were all a part of the cult.

While Bada, on the other hand, looked like the queen you were all worshipping. Her lips looked fuller due to the applied lipstick, the gems on the bridge of her nose accentuated her sharp facial features, and you couldn’t even react how you wanted to, not wanting to mess up your makeup artist.

Your gaze was now fixed on your mirror, and you were stunned at the look. It looked tamer than the rest, the makeup artist even putting some gems around your eyes. You were confused but didn’t question it, being a little happy you had something special going on.

Bada's makeup was completed first, and she took some mirror photos to capture her beauty. You had sneakily gone beside her, comfortably putting your arms around her waist. She flinched, "what are you doing?" She asks.

You just mumble into her shoulder, "Just take a picture," your deep voice giving her chills. She was sure glad she had layers of makeup on her face, or else you could see the blush forming rapidly. You continue to take photos, some even with you being in front of Bada, due to your height, arms wrapped around your neck, while acting as if she was gonna give you a peck on the cheek, yet she couldn't, afraid of getting her lipstick on your face.

"Filming begins in 5!" Everyone was told, and you all made your way onto the set.

Everyone crowded around on set when the camera started rolling, and you all marked your positioning. Kang Daniel made an announcement as filming progressed, but none of the leaders paid any mind about it, just focusing on their jobs. The ending scene had you, Bada, and Kristen dancing together, and you circle around each other being part of Bada’s idea. She blows on her thumb, insinuating she blew out the lighter.

When monitoring the entire thing, your eyes only watched Bada. You whistled when seeing her face and called her hot so often that the dancer tried to cool herself down by thirsting on her ice-cold water.

The shoot was complete, and you were excited to remove the makeup. Bada sees your bare face and how precious you look without all the fixed production all over you. Your long hair was messy, and you wore a navy blue tracksuit. You had texted her while getting ready to go, offering her a ride home, which she openly accepted, and asked her to meet you at the parking lot.

During the ride back to Bada's place, you notice the lip-biting and calmly tell her, "You know I'm here for you, right? If you just wanna get something off your chest, I'm all ears." She admits she was scared in a shaky voice. Everyone had worked really well on set. Bonds and friendships were being made left and right. Bada couldn't help but worry over her choice of worst dancer. You had thought about it, too. It was about to come down to the tiniest things when making a choice, but you just laid your hand on Bada's thigh, rubbing it in comfort, "When the time comes, I know you'll make the right decision."

You pause a little and joke, “even if it’s me.” You say, lifting up her mood. The both of you knew well in yourselves that she wouldn’t pick you. Really, she couldn’t even if she wanted to. Bada gave you many ways to shine: the makeup, the outfit, and center position in the final scene. There was almost no way she could pick you without looking like the craziest person in the world.

You drop her off, and this time, as a goodbye, you kiss her cheek, "I'll pick you up on Friday? So we can go on set together?" and she just obliges with a nod, not trusting anything to come out of her mouth because of your kiss.

Friday comes, and you pick Bada up from her place. That was after you had stopped by a coffee shop getting you two some bitter iced Americanos as you learned it was Bada’s favorite.

"You didn't have to, Y/n," she says as you hand her the coffee, "But I wanted to." She smiles as she joyfully sips on the drink. You had your music on the radio, with Bada and you singing to each other as you let her dance crazily while trying to drive safely. The car was full of laughter before the nerve-racking day, and it kept Bada's mind off it for some time.

As you make it to the building, you grab her hand and walk hand in hand-into the building. People notice the sight of the two together, and the teasing again erupts as you're both talked about by other crews, even your own. When the two of you separate ways, you see your team of younger dancers grinning your way. "Please tell me the two of you are dating now," Aria says, giggling beside you in the hideout. "You seem more excited about us getting together than we are," You kid.

"Unnie, you have to ask her out? What if someone beats you to it?"

"You mean if someone beats Bada-unnie to it." Lyn and Enyo argue, and you just smirk. "I don't think either of that will happen," you say with pure confidence, and your team shrieks in anticipation.

Everyone gets ready to head to the main stage, but you pull her aside when you see Bada walking in front of you. She looks at you anxiously, and you take both hands into her grasp, trying to shake the nerves away. "You'll make the right choice. I know you will," you tell her as you caress her face and kiss her forehead, which causes you to have to fix her beanie a little. She nods while deep breathing, "You're right, you're right." She tells you but repeats, seemingly trying to reassure herself of what will happen.

You were the last ones to the fight zone, but rather than receiving the teases and comments, it was dead silent. The tension was getting to everybody. This was for the first mission, and it was for the sake of their teams. It was terrifying, to say the least.

The videos started with the rookie class, where Rena was the main dancer. While watching, everyone was energized, the rookies boosting the mood of the studio. You watched the youngest, Lyn, who looked like she had the most fun while dancing to the high-energy pop song. When the video ends, you smile at Lyn, patting her thigh.

"You did so well, Lynnie," you tell her, and she tightly wraps her arms around your neck, giving you a quick cuddle in the crook of your neck.

As you watched the other videos, you never expected anything less from your team. Everyone did their jobs and did it right. Enyo and Heaven could be seen in the sea of dancers, and that told you enough. The air shifts when Mannequeen's Yoonji and Waackxxxy pick Kyma and Cheche as the worst dancers. The younger girls were asked to speak, but almost nothing came out. So Kang Daniel reverts the attention to Bada, "Bada-nim, what can you say?"

She picks up the mic and finds the right words, "I'll just have to consider this when choosing whose worst dancer is in leader class." Your mind spiraled at Bada's relaxed manner as she nodded, adding salt to the wound. Mannequeen was already down by 100 points. They couldn't afford any more losses right now.

Aria was whispering about their problems with you. During the video, everyone enjoyed it. The Lusher and Latrice duo made you proud of both girls. Latrice's solo in the end and Aria's center moment made you glad.

But while talking about the sub-leaders, the mood was still uneasy. "It seemed like most of us got along, other than Latrice and Downy. But Redlic did seem like she had a lot of say behind the scenes about Kristen being there helping Latrice help direct the video." You nod, understanding the circumstances now. If Kristen was there for support and threw ideas around, you didn't see the big issue. You assumed the other sub-leaders were questioning Latrice's leadership the entire time. Jam Republic then discussed who to pick, and you hear several names thrown around until you hear one of the girls saying a word that began with an 'R.' So you knew even before announcing who it was.

"The person I pick as the worst dancer is Redlic," by all means, after what you heard, you weren't even shocked by her choice. If you felt disrespected, you'd do the exact same thing.

It was now the leader's turn, and your hand felt sweaty. You knew in your heart you did well, and there was almost little to no chance of being the worst dancer, but you worried for Bada, not knowing if she'd be able to take the reality of her choice.

Everyone watched, and the crews were in awe. The way it was filmed, the dance, the vibes, it was too good. In the ending scene with you, Kristen, and Bada, everyone cheered, giving you all a standing ovation. You bow while seated, showing your respects, but it is finally time to pick.

Bada chats with her team and you. You look at her, feeling your chest getting heavy. She turns around and brings the mic to her mouth, "The leader I pick as the worst dancer is... DeepNDap Mina Myoung."

Kang Daniel asks for some words from Mina, but as she cries, your eyes never leave Bada's, seeing the tears falling down her cheeks. Your heart ached at the sight as her members tried to calm her down quickly. Never in a million years did you want to see Bada cry out of sadness. All you wanted to do was run up and give her the warmest hug you could.

Bada's eyes meet yours, and they plead for you to be near her. You bite your lip with a nod, getting frustrated as the time felt like it was going too slow for your liking. Even when your team ranked second, your mind was tunnel visioned on the tall dancer, and when you heard "Cut" from the director, you ran over to Bada. She stands up and lets your body fall into hers.

You swayed her body, and she relaxed, leaving her chin on her shoulder. "There were no wrong choices. You picked what you felt was right." The hug lasted forever, but you took her to the Aesthete room when you pulled her apart. The sad girl stood there as you whipped her tears away with a soft tissue and smiled a little.

"What are you smiling at, huh?"

"How pretty you are," she simply states, and you laugh. You grab her face, pecking her with light kisses, and she giggles. The tickling feeling makes her swoon over you. You then wanted to ensure you sealed the deal, giving her soft kisses on the lips.

For some reason, this doesn't surprise Bada. She takes it with open arms, even reciprocating it. "I don't ever wanna see you cry like that again," you tell her sincerely, but she laughs. "With you? I doubt I ever will."

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