#I’ve never felt cuteness aggression this strongly for an older man like this

[nerdy-frog98]

i just clenched my teeth super hard because i got CUTENESS AGGRESSION for chimney.

one of the last episodes of season 5, chim is sitting in the hospital (after the crazy jonah plot) and he’s sipping a juicebox…i’m not even lying when i say that was the cutest thing i have ever seen in my entire life. doe eyes and sipping his juicy juice like a little kid - AAAAHHHH. i want to hug him so hard.

(also hen and chim’s friendship IS SO CUTE)

[extrology]

Get to Know Baekhyun

Planets in Houses Astrology Reading(*)

First house (how he appears to others & takes action)

with sun here this man really loves attention

he’s just begging to be the center of things at all times

mercury + aries, oh boy, an accelerated gemini

he always needs to communicate and move around

seems to always be talking, writing and running all over the place

venus in taurus makes him exceptionally attractive

traits of libra make him artistic and charming

but he finds it very difficult to take action alone

possibly a pleasure addict

juno residing here makes relationships the most important thing in his life

yup you ain’t wrong fanfiction writers

also gives him an innocent aura (isn’t he a cutie though~?)

with house rulers aries & taurus he can charge into action and new projects

but also be calculated, able to keep focus and finish the projects. This is a superb balance for anything

(Say what you will but it describes Baekhyun just perfectly -  attention seeking, social, full of energy, stunningly beautiful and prepared to have relationships even if it puts his whole career on the line)

Third house (style of communication)

with moon here comes great imagination

this guy’s very real with his emotions

and doesn’t bottle his feelings

he’ll tell you how he actually feels (except for anger, see 12th house)

I love these kind of people, we all do

Fourth house (home)

with moon as house ruler he probably has an emotional and moody father

uses family as his “shell” to come back to

most likely a very caring and soft family

(remember exo’s showtime when asked where they wanna go for their day off Baek said to his grandma? Tell me that ain’t cute)

Tenth house (career & public image)

maybe the house ruler Capricorn would want something traditional

a career with order and structure

but neptune and uranus  residing here absolutely denies it

first of all, neptune brings so much confusion in career choice (poor baby)

but it makes people natural stars, great actors and cinematographers

anything to do with illusions

secondly, uranus makes him bad at anything conventional

don’t even think about a career in a business organization

absolutely hates when somebody is looking over his shoulder

(Pretty much born to be an idol/actor with his neptune and great looks in 1st house)

Eleventh house (friendships)

here lies saturn in aquarius which is emphasized by T-Square. He feels the effects very strongly

he must have friends to feel safe and secure

also very selective about his friends

prefers people several years older, probably had more mature friends all his life

has to actually work for his dreams and wishes

jealous of naturally talented and lucky people

(remember, luhan said the only time he saw Baekhyun cry was when he was practicing and couldn’t hit the high note no matter how hard he tried. This bby is really hard working)

(dunno about his friends but he dated Taeyon, she was older than him by a few years, and considering strict Korean “man-always-older” attitude, that  says something)

Twelfth house (something we’re hiding from the world & ourselves)

with mars here just avoid making him angry

he’s perfect at hiding his frustration and aggression

but OH BOY, be careful for when he explodes

no, seriously I’ve seen some murderers with this placement, I’m not saying it’s that severe tho

Tao: “Baekhyun is so mature, he even never gets angry at all.”

(I’ve never seen this man angry and when I found this gif I was pretty surprised. Just look at his reaction, he looks like he lost control for a second and that made him uncomfortable)

(I worry because lately baek started getting angry with fans who interact with him off-schedule thanks saesangs)

Bonus

Pluto in eight house can make one a sex addict

(there were rumors about Baek and /---/ being playboys and coming late at nights. I can somewhat see it)

Chart type - Splash. He’s like a chameleon and can adapt to any situation

Perfect balance with Cardinal, Fixed and Mutable elements. Now that’s just.

Perfect. There’s no other word for it. Perfect balance. (and so rare)

Has The most prominent and godly Grand Trine I’ve seen (it’s a good thing and I will cover in aspect post) o.o’

He has Fortuna in second house AKA house of money and possessions

Born to be rich. Ka-Ching

*Keep in mind to do a house reading you need and accurate birth date, this is just a hypothetical one BUT I’m pretty sure it very close as the reading fits him just too well. So I felt confident enough to post it here. See for yourself. Enjoy~

P.S. Dear fanfic writers if you use this as a reference I’d love to read it. I’m a sucker for accurate fanfics ^^ Just tag it with #extrology

Thank you to r-velvets for allowing me to use her gif for that awkward graphic. I’m improving though ;-;

[ava-rosier]

Ta-dah, have a preview of my Theonsa tumblr fic. More like ‘I wanna prove to @theonbaejoys and @soapieturner that I haven’t forgotten about it’. It’s untitled because I haven’t thought up the perfectest wittiest title yet. 

Rated Mild-for-Theon, with a little kick.

“I can't believe I've never done this before.”

“What- slept with me?” Theon wriggles his eyebrows suggestively.

By this point in her life, having known him for fourteen years, Sansa's eye roll is reflexive. “Me on your couch while you were in your bed doesn't count as sleeping together. Or is the number of women you've claimed to have had sex with inflated?” she retorts, making Theon hold his hands out in show a of halfhearted self-defense. She knows he isn't offended, he's teased her worse than this and she's snapped back at him harder than this.

“Hey now, don't go casting aspersions on my ability to count. I'll have you know every single woman left me knowing I'd fucked them so good their mothers probably felt it before they were even born.”

Sansa groans at the tasteless modifier; he snickers. This is classic Theon; he's always been a horndog chasing after girls and, to hear Robb tell it, he's equal opportunity about college women and horny divorcées nowadays.

She holds up her wine glass, waving it in front of his face. “I meant this. I've never drank alcohol before nine in the morning. Actually I don't think I've ever drank alcohol before noon. And drinking at a club at two a.m. doesn't count!” She rushes to add the last before he could catch her on a technicality.

“Math and alcohol at 8:38 on a Sunday morning. Well, you can always count on me to provide you with new experiences here, Princess.” The old nickname rolls off his tongue easily, but it settles on her differently.  Here, thousands of leagues south of where they'd grown up, Theon's pet name for her feels like a special, secret language shared by only them, that no one else knows.

Blinking away this strange, intrusive thought, Sansa glances around the empty pub backyard instead. It's a chilly Sunday morning in Blackcrown and the skies are just gray, gray, and more gray. Even with the building in the way of the wind, it blows strongly enough that droplets of rain periodically hit her in the face. The Salty Hoar has all the markings of a dive bar: sticky, banged up wooden tables that rock unsteadily when you place any weight on them, chairs that don't match, and a very basic bar selection that reluctantly includes some greasy fare. She can see how Theon loves it.

Despite the cloudy day, they both wear sunglasses, and neither can claim to be hungover. The shades do make them look like they have no fucks to give, which perfectly accessorizes the Naval-brand sweats she is borrowing from Theon to wear on the train back to Oldtown in lieu of the rather fussy and dramatic black dress she'd worn the night before, which is now folded up in a plastic shopping bag.

This is the strangest walk of shame she's ever taken.

She takes advantage of the relative anonymity provided by the sunglasses to study the man sitting next to her. Theon slouches in his chair, looking out at the homes and businesses situated on the hill below them, leading to the shoreline. He's always been boisterous and cocksure, perpetually in motion and in your face. But now there's a genuine self-assurance about him, a contrast from his teenage years. Clearly the military has been good for him.

His head nods to the rhythm of a song only he can hear, fingers lightly drumming on the side of his glass. Sansa isn't sure why it feels so alien to be sitting here with Theon Greyjoy, someone she's known over half her life- laughing and talking with him until her cheeks hurt.

Robb. That has to be it. The answer comes to her with the sort of quiet clarity that makes her feel external to the moment. She had only ever interacted with Theon as Robb's best friend. That has to be why it feels so...taboo...to be here without Robb in between them.

“Thanks again for rescuing me last night and letting me crash at your place.” Harry had never treated her particularly nicely, she could see that now. But what she'd thought was a sweet summer flirtation that could grow more serious had only become tense and distant once the fall term had begun and everyone was back in Oldtown.

He'd been too cowardly to tell her outright he didn't want to be in a relationship anymore and instead had resorted to treating her like shit until she got fed up and called him out on it. Of course, she had decided the last straw was when they were out of town and he kept passively-aggressively complaining about every activity Sansa wanted to do. Hence how she had ended up abandoned in an unfamiliar place at a very late hour of the night.

Theon shakes his head, making a little moue with his mouth. “Nah, don't worry about it. And I meant what I said before. I know some guys. Just say the fucking word and we'll castrate this douchenozzle.” He sounds gleeful at the thought.

A wave of fondness sweeps through her.  She's glad, rather than irritated, with her older brother now for having the foresight and determination to put Theon's number in her phone before she moved so far away from her family. “There's no need. I am in a sorority, after all, and all I have to do is tell a few of my sisters what Harry did, and they'll spread the word. He'll be symbolically castrated at the Cit.” She smirks as she fishes through her purse for her phone, having now remembered Margaery's demands of an update this morning. Her friend might actually be awake by now.

“A patented Sansa Stark revenge, nice!” Theon whistles before taking another slow pull of his beer. “I always knew you were gonna be a sorority chick by the way.”

Sansa arches an eyebrow. “Did you now?”  He looks altogether too smug, chest all puffed out.

“Yup.  In high school, you and your girlfriends were into the whole 'wear tiny pajama shorts and have pillow fights to tease the boys' thing. That cute friend of yours, Beth? It always was obvious she wanted a bounce on Robb's cock. Sororities are basically the same thing, just times ten.”

Sansa is torn between gagging at that mental picture, and smacking him over the head because of the warped stereotype about sorority girls. “One: I really don't need to hear about my brother's penis, thank you. And two: we don't have pillow fights, we support each other and organize charities,” she argues. He is unrepentant, however.

“No, but you get all dolled up and go clubbing, don't you? I betcha have lots of guys panting after those legs of yours in a tight skirt.” If it weren't for the sunglasses, Sansa suspects she would see Theon's eyes roving over her body. Did you pant after my legs in those tiny pajama shorts? She wonders with a small frisson of excitement.

“Maybe so.” To distract herself from the way her body is flushing, she scrolls through her notifications before unlocking her phone. Bran had texted her something with the latest meme sweeping through the internet, one or two of her friends had asked what her plans tonight were, and there are a few Tumblr notifications.

“Anything from Dick Move?”

“Nope. I kind of want to block his number outright,” she admits, “but I'm also hoping he'll try to get a booty call out of me someday just so I can completely ignore his text.”

Theon slides his palm through the air in front of him. “Read 10:23 pm.”  He chortles at the thought.

“Exactly.”

She goes to her Tumblr app, promising herself she won't eat through most of her monthly data in one go.  When the page loads, there's a gifset from her favorite historical fantasy show, she makes sure to like it on the spot. Before she can stop him or tilt her phone away, Theon's bending his head close to see what she's got on the screen.

"You’ve got a Tumblr too? No fucking way!” he exclaims.

Why does he have to be so loud? At least she doesn't live in this town and there's barely anyone within earshot. Sansa hisses as she hits the home button on her phone, glaring reproachfully at him. “What's so 'no fucking way' about me having a Tumblr?”

He shrugs, shaking his head in the way men do when they know better than to tell the truth. “Nothing, I'm just surprised. Dunno why.” There's something different about his attention now, even though she can't see his eyes.

“Too. You said 'too'. That means you've got one. If anything I should be surprised you're on that site,” she says accusingly.

“What can I say, I'm a man of surprising depths.” She snorts at that, which he accepts with good humor. He snaps his fingers and points at her, grinning. “You know what you should do? You should give me your url.”

She gives him a look like that's the stupidest thing in the world. “I'm not sure I want you to know the depths of some of my fandom obsessions.”

“Come on,” he cajoles. “It's Uncle Theon-”

“Ok, that is so creepy. Never do that again.”

“Fine. But my point still stands. It's me. D'you think there's much that's going to shock me?”

She bites her lip and contemplates it. Maybe it's the weirdness and giddiness of having wine in the early morning, but Sansa finds herself grabbing a pen and scribbling her url down on a napkin and handing it to Theon, who slides his sunglasses to the top of his head to read it.

“'lemoncakess'. Cute. I bet it's very aesthetic.” As he chuckles at the url that had taken forever for her to settle upon (all the good ones she wanted were being hoarded), Sansa finds herself mentally scrolling through her tumblog's archive, trying to remember if there were any incriminating text posts or embarrassing reblogs.

“Don't diss the aesth. I bet yours is full of shitposting.”

“And then some.” He winks, folding the napkin and shoving it into his jacket. “Expect a visit from T-money in the next few days.”

“Is that your url?” It's horrid enough that she's cringing with secondhand embarrassment.

Her assumption only gets her an eye roll. “Nah. I just figured that if 'Uncle Theon' didn't fly, then neither would referring to myself as 'Big Daddy'.”

“But T-money seemed more acceptable?”

“It's what my buddies call me. It all started this one time I was dared to act like a stripper at a bar. I had tons of chicks- and some dudes- sticking their easily-earned stags in my smalls.”

“That I can believe.” She deadpans.

Theon has a wicked grin on his face even as he drains the last of his beer before grabbing his keys and standing up. “C'mon, sweet cheeks, let's get you to the station. I have the depths of a blog to plunder.”

[blackunicorn2020]

Watering My Well Being

This current relationship is full of anxiety and fear along with distrust. Shutting down has become a safe way for me to live. Due to the severe trauma exspearanced in adolescent years, and the overwhelming rise of anxiety or pain going through my day to day, I revert back to mental place that is safe. And the only time I've felt that safe was as a toddler. I was cute and received a lot of attention from my mom, I was fed warm/hot meals and dressed like a princess. There was love and lots of it though smiles and physical affection.

My partner turned 40 this January, I turned 26 last November. We met at work in a famous Los Angeles Italian restaurant where he was set up to train me. I strongly disliked him from the jump. He micromanaged and his tone was never correct enough for me. We all bussed our asses on busy nights and he is the best in the establishment so we celebrated over whisky, chianti and joints. He chased me and I let him, I played it cool the entire time. I am in a relationship with a person that is a huge trigger for me. Our codependency is becoming toxic, I don't trust that he is the man for the job, and this is all because of his drinking. He turns in to a *completely* different person-a evil vial aggressive force of destruction.

Picture a 5 year old on her birthday, she was born for the party that awaits her. The dolls she sleeps with and the friends and family to join. All the snacks and goodies she could ever have awaits as soon as she brushes her teeth and puts on a party dress. She can't stop moving and smiling and making sounds and noises with her lips and mouth. Burst of excitement in forms of jumping, wiggling, dancing, and spinning in circles. She can't stop singing little made up tunes or be still, twirling her finger in her hair. Now picture Trunchbull from *Matilda,* her gaining energy from suffering children how she genuinely hated if a kid was jolly, and did everything in her power to stop it from taking place in her sight. This is my partner when he drinks.

How do you tell someone that when they drink to the point they start to talk crazy and getting aggressive terrifies them? What if he tell me that the childish behavior that was once really cute and adorable is unbecoming and annoying. During the Covid-19 quarantine time we have been drifting apart, I lost my job almost 40 days ago. So I have been home on lock down going mentally nuts. And when I go nuts I keep it to myself, it takes days for me to come clean on what's going through my head or, to explain why my face looked the way it did. We live together. I moved in the end of summer last year.

With him being 40 I revert back to a childish place of being completely taken care of. When looking for a boyfriend I am attracted to older, well established, financially stable men. Can you completely take care of yourself? Do you have enough money to take care of someone else? Like a wife or children if that's in your cards. I desperately want to be taken care of. It is a real strong desire that I have. When existing in the element I feel at home, I feel conferrable and stress free like I'm living me best life. I have little to no anxiety, when in a stressful situation I don't feel the pressure to self harm, less self dialog, mental stability and physical comfort in the safety of it all.

My partner pays the rent in a rent controlled building and utilities, he buys the food and house supplies, takes care of the cannabis medical supply weekly, and tampons monthly. I am really blessed. I have little to no money when pay day comes. I owe and pay child support on top of paying back money borrowed and bills that are past due form having my own apartment last year. We don't drive, so I pitch in for Ubers, wine, food, and other things when we go out. My $984 before taxes every 2 weeks including cash + credit card tips is nothing to his $1,100 after taxes a week. My money is to be saved he says so I can have a apartment of my own soon.

I was evicted from my Koreatown apartment. It fucked my credit and now I'm playing catch up and repair woman. I kept the apartment after leaving a abusive relationship the big victorian 2 Bedroom 1 Bathroom was mines to find a new roommate to pay half the rent with. I had gotten pregnant again and I just knew I was going to do something stupid with suicidal thoughts. I missed out on a months full time shifts gagging or vometting every 5 minuets dizzy, very low energy, and just the most physical pain and discomfort. I was the maitre d in a very popular Italian establishment so pushing through work with these kind of symptoms is more of a health code violation as l like to call it. Rent got bagged up paying only half for months. Then my roommate moved out after a year because her and her new boyfriend wanted to move in together. Going on to packing up my apartment putting everything out side for the community to have (& they took it all... yessss) that I could not pack to have ready for Make Space to pick up. I was mentally relapsing *hard.*

I rented one of my best friends living room futon before moving in with my partner now. We had a blast, for them to be a married couple we all feel like siblings when hanging out, staying up late watching Cosmic Discloser eating popcorn and drinking red wine. There too I felt safe, I felt loved and cared protected. It was stable, I had a job, paid my rent and always had a place to sleep. I wasn't dating for a while because I believed I didn't deserve to once I got evicted. Just like millions of Americans right now I am waiting till the economy is back up in runny to apply for a job again. I have been working in the Food & Beverage industry for over 10 years now and we are all being heavily effected right now.

My partner asked me if I regress. I said no because I was ashamed, I felt like a child in trouble once again like someone seen me pick my nose and eat it. Because I am so interested about my trauma and the mind I looked it up. Among this one I do suffer from many other forms of behavior and psychosocial disorders, I identify with a lot and its scary and amazing. I know that I am not the only one going through these feelings so it make me want to look and search more. To find out the when, who's, why, and how's. I wanna know why I am the way I am, how I got this way so that I am able to reverse it. How to get out of my head...

If I am not suppose to be in a relationship with a 40 years young man then Universe, let a sista know! All the anxiety I have is not only for myself but for my partner too. Dose he want more, dose he want to get married, adopt a baby, dose he ever wanna live anywhere else, what dose his dream home look like, political views, universal views, do you morally believe in good or evil. He deserves joy and freedom just like me-like anyone else. And as I seek these answers I don't like what l find. I find that we want two completely different lives. We live in two different worlds. I love him and that hurts me, my love is what I stay. I feel cared for and wanted even when its rough. I stay rough because a part of me feels like this is the best partner I can gain in a relationship. These are the best days. The battle between ungratefulness and self worth continues. I never know if i am settling or being ungrateful. The craving of acceptance and unconditional love is finding out who l am and how can she be loved.

I know my triggers. Not all of them but enough to know what will send me into relapse. The sounds, smells, people, places, and events. The most important thing is l am aware of the work that needs to be done on me. She knows that she can't do it successfully on her own, she knows that this requires money and resources that she dose not have right now. She knows she's a survivor, but she is dangerously eager to live to explore, to no longer live in slavery of her trauma only having to search for more coping practices. To have the privilege to take time not worrying about money or bills as an obstacle to get the help she needs. To have absolutely no excuses. The courage it takes to stand alone, stay up late, cry, open up about the things she pretends never happened. To get away from it all retreating to a safe place where she can fall completely apart emotionally, visiting those places that she brainwashed herself to believe never existed.

[mika-rd]

Plan and making it happen

*going to make a plan and the start of each week to try make sure i get everything i need to be done

to send the email to wellington high staff member i need changing the trajectory

research behind my process - why it will work 

a outline - short version. should first contact say less???

asking about the ethics process

My process 

The rise of high school feminism

The 11.20 bell marks the start of morning tea, and as hundreds of students stream out of classrooms into the sun, a group of 15 convenes in room D11.

At the door is a quote from American televangelist Pat Robertson: "Feminism is a socialist, anti-family, political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practise witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians."

The quote is there ironically, of course. The teenagers congregating in D11 are members of Auckland's Western Springs College Young Feminists Club, who are here for an informal focus group. They're a bonfire – light the kindling with a question, and seconds later they're ablaze with chatter.

"I'm Posey," a member begins. "Some of the stuff that goes on in society and school gets me really worked up. Watching the typical day-to-day things, it's like, Oooh." Asked what "stuff" the 17-year-old means, and the group comes alive: catcalling, sexual harassment, feeling unsafe walking alone at night.

"The way women are portrayed on TV is a big thing for me," says Healy Jones, 17. "Watching shows where there's only one woman who's ditzy and can't do anything, that really pushed me to join."

The group came together last year after a wary few noticed a double standard in the school's dress code.

"We had some friends who were continuously getting pulled up by teachers, and it was really unfair: 'I can see your bra straps – you're a distraction,'" recalls the group's co-leader, 17-year-old Thomas Rands. "We had issues about the language teachers were using."

With two others, Rands set up a Facebook group then sent a notice around the school inviting students to discuss the issue. Come lunchtime, more than 40 teenagers had convened to go through the school's dress code, line by line. Senior management took their comments on board, and changed the wording of the policy. And, with that, the club was born.

"At first, I wasn't anti the group, but I wasn't 100 percent for it, because I was caught up in the mob mentality," says 17-year-old Marlon Drake. "Everyone is freaked out by the connotations around the name feminism."

Connotations? The group pounces again: man eaters, man haters, hairy-armpit lesbians. "It's [perceived as] women trying to be better than men, targeting men and victimising themselves when there's nothing wrong," says Drake, "which I've since learned is untrue."

Until recently, feminist scholars had observed with concern that young women seemed reluctant to call themselves feminists. While these young women had no problem with the movement's core values – equality, legal rights, empowerment – they saw the label 'feminist' as irrelevant to their lives and heavy with historic baggage.

"It was disheartening to see how little engagement the young women had with feminism," concluded a 2008 study of young British women's attitudes towards feminism. It was, they noted, uncool to call oneself a feminist.

Yet in the last three years, feminism has reached a level of ubiquity in popular culture. Feminist voices have found huge audiences online, young celebrities now regularly discuss the topic, and overseas polls have found that more people are identifying with the label. (No similar poll appears to have been taken in New Zealand.)

During that shift, at least six groups like the Western Springs College Young Feminists Club have popped up in schools around New Zealand. These are millennials who aren't just embracing the feminist label, but actively calling out sexism, fundraising for causes they believe in, and protesting wherever they see inequality.

"There's this idea of young people being depicted as politically apathetic and quite narcissistic," says Dr Sue Jackson, a senior lecturer at Victoria University who specialises in girlhood studies. In late 2013, Jackson heard that students from a local high school had started a feminist club. "I went, 'Wow'. I felt like that was really significant because to date, what we hear is [that] young women have been turning away from feminism." She plans to study the groups and their significance in a project starting later this year.

Other academics took note too. Nicola Gavey is a professor at the University of Auckland school of psychology, where she has long taught a paper on feminism and psychology. It used to be that her students would start the class knowing little about feminism, or with misconceptions about the movement, and her first job would be to clear up the confusion. But in the last two years she's noticed a change. "There's a large proportion of the students who are already identifying as feminists," says Gavey. "Students are telling me they got into feminism when they were in high school. That would have been quite unusual five years ago."

The question facing these researchers is why teenagers are now choosing to identify as feminists, after decades of rejecting the label. Has an increasingly pervasive feminist lens on current events, such as the Roastbusters case, sparked some long-dormant activism? Is it because social media gives young people a platform to dissect sexism and connect with a wider feminist community? Or is it because the likes of Lorde and Lena Dunham identify as feminist, so now it's cool?

It's all of the above, decides the Western Springs focus group. Social media plays a huge role: on Facebook, students witness sexism and aggression on the part of their peers towards feminist content and voices, but it's also where they share articles and stories from a feminist perspective and develop a critical awareness of sexism.

"With social media, not only do we have the hunger, but it's so easy for us to access all of this education," says 17-year-old Matilda Boese-Wong. "We educate ourselves and become aware of these issues, and we can't help but get involved and do something about it."

Olive Brown is head girl at Wellington East Girls' College, and leads the school's feminist club, FeminEast, which was founded in 2013. She thinks pop culture is playing a big part in the resurgence of the feminist label. "Lots of celebrities are now asked if they consider themselves to be feminists and this has encouraged many young people to look into feminism. It's sort of becoming cool."

FeminEast meets in room 25 every Friday lunchtime. The senior students usually have a PowerPoint prepared, with news stories to generate discussion. The club picks a different topic each term, and works towards creating a zine based on those conversations. They're usually eight pages long, and the 30-odd group members go class to class, selling them for koha.

"Zines are a really good way to share ideas with people," says Brown. "They're not huge and overwhelming, but they're small, cute, and the girls seem to really like them. Some of the pages are just images, but if we give them to the girls and the wider community, it's sharing what we've done."

For the first term of 2015, FeminEast looked at the portrayal of women in the media. The zine they produced gives some insight into what discussions took place during Friday lunchtimes. One page has a vintage photo of four women in swimwear, surrounded by felt-tip drawings and stickers, and a quote: "As long as women are repeatedly portrayed as status symbols, accessories and almost always half naked in media, the way the world views women is never going to change. Women are multi-faceted and deserve roles that show every side of them. Change our Representation."

"FeminEast provides the girls with a space where they can talk about things they might not be talking about anywhere else," says Brown. "Overall, I aim to inspire the girls and get them talking about issues that are affecting them."

Key issues affecting young women today include: sexual harassment and slut-shaming; physical self-loathing; a propensity for self-harm and eating disorders; misrepresentation in media; workplace discrimination; and access to contraception and abortion services.

That last issue resonates particularly strongly with members of the Wellington Girls' College Feminist Club. On a Saturday afternoon last month, in response to a 40-day pro-life campaign outside Wellington Hospital, six members of the group staged a counter protest. They stood on benches opposite the pro-life campaigners, holding signs high so passing cars could see their messages. "Pro Choice" one sign read. Another said: "My body, my life, my control". One had a picture of a coat hanger, with the words "Never again" above it.

The signs were made the Wednesday prior, during the Wellington Girls' College Feminist Club's fortnightly lunchtime meeting. Around 40 students had brainstormed ideas for the placards, refined the concepts and drawn them using felt pens.

The coat hanger was the most provocative idea, but it raised an important point, says Grace Belworthy, one of the club's three leaders. "Our grandmothers and mothers fought for the right to safe abortions. Having groups standing across from the hospital, infringing on a woman's right to have an abortion peacefully…" she pauses. "It was about supporting the women who went there to make a safe decision about their lives. We felt it was our responsibility to go and support them."

Taking part in protests, whether on the day or behind the scenes beforehand, is empowering, says Belworthy. "It's also a message to wider society that this generation, and young women especially, we do care about what's going on. Sometimes, the older generations think we're just smartphone-obsessed and living in our own heads. We are here, thinking about these issues and we want to shape our future world."

Belworthy leads the club's 40 members with Alex Woodhouse Appleby and Sophie Ballantyne, all 17. This is the third year of the group, and the three are trying to make it a forum where students can share their stories and opinions on different gender issues, but also have their views challenged.

"It's a safe space where girls should feel free to discuss any concerns they might have and maybe learn from others, gaining different perspectives on things," says Woodhouse Appleby. Ballantyne adds: "In the club, we're kind of a tight-knit community. We've become a cute little family. We're all really friendly to each other. I love the feeling of support and acceptance in the group."

This feeling of collectivity is an important part of feminism, says Professor Gavey. All political movements need some form of solidarity, and high school feminists have found this unity in their clubs."It must be so amazing for young women to be in places where other people feel the same way and they don't have to be afraid of being shot down because of their views," she says. "There's a lot of hostility and aggression and silencing of feminist voices. [The groups are] incredibly interesting and really encouraging."

While it feels good to be in the club, members of all these groups still sense hostility towards the word 'feminist'. Ballantyne recalls comments from their meetings: "Some girls have said, 'My friends think I'm crazy for coming here', or, 'My friends judged me for coming here.'"

The one thing leaders hope to give their groups is the awareness that 'feminism' is a positive word. Giving people a proper understanding of feminism when they're young is the best way to break down the stigma around the movement, says FeminEast's Olive Brown. "There's this idea that coming out and saying you're a feminist is radical, when really it's simple and not such a big deal."

Back in room D11 at Western Springs College, one question has the students searching for an answer: Do they think the group will continue once they leave school, or is the club part of a passing fad?

Last year, Takapuna Grammar School in Auckland had a similar feminist club, but since the student spearheading it left for university, the group has not reconvened.

"I guess you might have this idea that it's part of a whole fad; that it's just very faddish, and very now, and very hot," says Dr Jackson. "But I think when you look at why these clubs were set up, it's not about that. It is very much about a political concern with these gender inequities."

Rands doesn't think it's a fad. While Emma Watson's speech at the United Nations last year, or Beyoncé's Grammy performance in front of the word 'FEMINIST' may be making the movement mainstream, that's not enough to make someone want to be a feminist. More likely, they'll realise it's the label for something they've felt all along.

"I know a lot of people who never considered feminism have started to think about it and realised their ideals are equivalent with feminism," he says. "They're already a feminist – they just didn't know it."

more similar info one, two

Zine Culture, Feminism and the riot grrrl and self love

movenmenthttps://feministzinefestnyc.wordpress.com/2014/03/28/interview-with-zinesters-for-the-birds-collective/ https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2014/mar/29/fifth-wave-feminists-young-activists https://www.facebook.com/fzfnyc/

more

How could I reinvent women identity with somewhat reinventing riot grrrl

http://salient.org.nz/2017/10/retracing-riot-grrrl/

notes 

*remember it is essentially self-help

ZINES/MAGAZINES

https://issuu.com/gritz1ne/docs/gritissue1

https://issuu.com/tomtommagazine/docs/ttm-issue32-hires

https://issuu.com/onebookforyou/docs/grrrls-interior

https://issuu.com/ggbzine

potential contacts - 

WGC Feminist Radio

https://www.facebook.com/groups/293350380810370/

whs feminist club

alternatively and aswell i could use people in there twenties that had experience and opinions about the mistreatment, it would be good to combine past and present insights

http://www.wcl.govt.nz/blog/index.php/2014/04/12/more-zines-to/

Ethics meeting notes with Tim Parkin and the ethics advisor and thoughts thereafter

I am concerned about the ability to actually get anything back from high school teachers and principal, the possibility of a workshop through that route could be problematic and slim. I need to look for other options or ways around it.

Potential possibilities?