#I’ve got all that typed up AND every character’s Paths figured out

[thatringboy]

rwby in a honkai star rail AU where the plot is exactly the same except the Brothers are now Long and Tayzzyronth and Salem hasn’t realized that those aeons are dead is this anything

[americasass81]

So, This Is Love!

Warnings 18+ for the following:- Oral (female receiving), Anal Play, Use of Sex Toy, P in V Smut, Overstimulation.  Do not read if any of these warnings are upsetting. Feedback is welcomed.

By proceeding you are acknowledging that you are over 18 and are consenting to the content below the cut.

Author’s Note 1:- Written for Siri’s Birthday Bonanza, this fic my sweet @stargazingfangirl18 is a gift from me to you.  Using the choices listed below, I hope my first time trying out your favorite character works out.  I know he’s one I’ve been longing to write but never quite felt I could pull him off.  Happy birthday and fingers crossed babe cause here we go.

CE!Babe:- Ransom Drysdale (Nightclub Owner AU).

Scenario Prompt:- The moment you or babe realize you’re in love with the other.

Dialogue Prompts:- “By the time I’m done with you, you’ll be ruined for anyone else.”  & “Do you know how long I’ve waited for this?”

Author’s Note 2:- As always, all images have been found through google search.

Synopsis:- Heading off to a club to spend your birthday with your friends takes a turn you never expected when your path crosses that of an old flame.

Pairing:- dark/soft!nightclub owner Ransom Drysdale x Female Reader

Word Count:- 3,303

Walking through the door you still couldn't figure out why you had agreed to such an excursion, but here you were anyway.  Oh sure, it was your birthday and Risk was one of the hottest, if not the hottest, nightclubs in the city.  But he owned it and damn it if you ever again wanted anything to do with Hugh Ransom Drysdale.

Standing just inside the entrance now as you took in the elaborate decor and distastefully dressed servers, Suz and the rest of your girl friends waving down at you from the V.I.P. section required you to put your opinions of this place on hold at least temporarily however.  For this was an extra disaster you had not been expecting.

Having to listen patiently and politely while your college roommate complained extensively about all the new fixtures and revisions that arrogant trust fund prick kept demanding at the last minute, walking past the door marked private now on your way to your friends confirmed what your vague recollection of countless blueprints lying around your dorm room had imprinted on you memory ... your birthday celebration was not only taking place in his club, but your booth was located right beside that annoying fuck's office.  Which definitely put an even bigger dampener on the whole celebration.

Plastering on an enthusiastic smile however as you neared the secluded area to be swallowed up in the hugs and birthday wishes from those who had your back through every major crisis or celebration, your first sip of the exquisitely expensive champagne and you told yourself to hell with it.  This was your night, your party and you were going to be damned if you let someone like Mr. Jumped Up Drysdale ruin it for you.  After all, who's to say he was even in the club or aware of your presence here.  No, settling into the nearest vacant seat now as your friends showered you with presents, a few more glasses of the club's best bubbly and you were ready to let your hair down.  Which is exactly what you and the girls got ready to do.

Collecting up your gifts now and placing them in the safe discreetly provided in a hidden compartment under the seats, your group next made its way down to the main floor so the fun filled night could begin in earnest.  And what a night it was.  Dancing until your feet hurt and singing until your voice really couldn't take any more, you now watched from the bar as Suz dealt with the advances of some blond haired bodybuilder who was far removed from the type of guy she would normally entertain.  But still, you had to give him points for trying since, no matter how she turned him down or how many times she returned to dancing with the rest of your group, he remained close by.

But at least she seemed more than capable of handling him so far and simply carried on enjoying her night.  You however were not holding up as well it seemed.

Finally receiving the drink you were patiently waiting for now, the noise beginning to batter your head and the lack of a spot to take the weight off your tired feet soon found you back in the V.I.P. section without shoes and friends however as you took a few moments to rest and regroup.  Not that your wishes were catered to in regards to this matter for very long it seemed.

Closing your eyes temporarily now as you simply allowed the rhythm of the music to seep into your being while the seat beneath you comforted you like an old friend, a shadow crowding your space and the clearing of a throat brought you suddenly back to where you were and the vulnerable position you had allowed yourself to fall into.  But that was the least of your worries as things were about to get a whole lot worse.  Looking up now at the bouncer who had manned the door upon your arrival earlier in the night, his outstretched hand and instructions to follow him did not fill you with confidence and things only got so much worse when he led you a very short distance to the last place you ever wanted to be with these walls.  For this was the place where your nightmares dwelled.

Sitting behind his desk now as the bouncer in question ushered you into his boss' office, you were just about to object and walk back out the way you had entered when the metal door shutting in your face told you escape was not an option.  As it was, the prick ignoring you with his head pouring over various documents was more than enough to distract you and get your temper flaring.  Which is how all of your previous encounters with this man usually started.

"Hey dickface, I'm trying to enjoy a night out with my girl friends here.  You want to tell me why you're interrupting it?" you asked angrily and you couldn't believe the audacity of the man before you when he simply held up his finger and kept reading as if you hadn't just spoken.  It was as if he was determined to see just how far your patience would stretch.  But you weren't going to give him the satisfaction.  At least you hoped not.

Taking a seat in front of his desk instead as you now remembered why you had left the dance floor in the first place, him turning over the sheet of paper to yet another page infuriated you enough however to finally force a reaction from you and it wasn't one he liked apparently.  Placing your feet on his desk now in a show of disrespect no different from what he himself had been engaged in with the reading, Ransom rising from his own chair now and walking around to your side brought your full attention to him and his on you.

"Remove your feet from my desk right now Princess or I promise you won't be sitting down for a week by the time I'm through with you," he warned and though it wasn't in your nature to give him what he wanted, you had a party to get back to and you figured the sooner you got done with him the sooner you could go back outside and drink away the memory of this whole interaction.  That and the unwelcome effect his tone was having on you.

But Ransom it seemed had other plans.  Smiling in triumph now as you did what he asked, he then took the empty chair beside you and sitting down facing you began to question you incessantly on your opinion of the club, the music, the staff and pretty much how well you were enjoying your night within the walls of his establishment.

Still a little pissed off but now more confused as to why your opinion even mattered to him however, Ransom reaching down under his desk to pick up a box you hadn't seen until now brought a new set of questions flooding through your mind instead.  Like what was he playing at, for example?  He hated your guts after all and it was no secret you would love nothing more than to rip him to shreds and never set eyes on him again.  So why now was he doing something that only a sweet person with a soul would do for someone they genuinely liked?  Looking back and forth between him and the box now as he held it out between you and let the silence drown out your further questions, your own hand reaching out to take it from him however was perhaps the most surprising part of this whole exchange.  At least until you opened the gift that is.

Taking off the top and suspecting that a garment of some sort lay nestled neatly beneath the tissue layers, it was the envelope on top that caught your attention first and it was this that your fingers now reached out for.  Balancing the box on your lap then as the weight of the envelope settled in your hand, turning it over and ripping it open to reveal its contents practically took your breath away.  For the bastard had somehow done the impossible.

Printed out in clear detail, with a departure date and arrival date was a four week, all expenses paid holiday for two that you had been putting off since your early days in college.  But how on earth did he possibly know about that?  As far as you knew this was a secret you had carried around with you all these years.  And yet here was the proof that at least one other person knew and it just had to be the worst possible one.

Looking between the schedule, tickets and Ransom now as you tried to figure out what you should do or what you should say, this task would have to wait however as the man before you spoke again and sent your thoughts spinning into orbit once more.  "Well Princess, I'm sure there's one or more items still waiting for you to feast your pretty little eyes on," he reminded you with a smirk that in no way engendered confidence in what you would find, but what choice did you really have.

Your friends didn't know where you were and were more likely than not still enjoying the wonderful perks that had probably right now been laid on to distract them from what the owner was currently up to.  Add to that the fact that this room was locked and possibly soundproofed and he really had you right where he wanted you.  Which didn't help your mood or blood pressure one bit when you peeled back the tissue and revealed a silky dress you not only knew would cover very little, but also suspected bore a price tag that would easily feed a starving village for a week.  Which was a damn good reason to hate it.  That and the fact that he had bought it.

So with your mind made up that there was no earthly way you were wearing that thing, you would have told Ransom as much right there if he didn't already have some sixth sense to figure it out for himself.  And his response shocked you far more than anything else had so far this night.  For as it was, he took the box from your lap now and placing it on top of his desk, dropped to his knees in front of you and asked you to put it on in a manner that was so far removed from the Ransom Drysdale you knew that it tore at your heart to deny him.  Then again, it might simply be a result of all the alcohol you had consumed so far.  Either way, the fury slipped away as easily as the dress you entered the club with and replacing it with this new one, your suspicions had proven completely correct ... it indeed covered very little.

Encasing your breasts nicely to the point where Ransom stepped up behind you now and helped remove your superfluous bra, the rest of the material just about made it to the end of your ass cheeks, but neither of these were the problem at this exact moment.  Placing the spaghetti straps back on your shoulders now that your bra had been tossed aside, Ransom's hands now lingering in place should have had you screaming for assistance ... but this wasn't happening.  Remaining instead where you were now, as your eyes traveled back to the box on the desk and the envelope it still held, his fingers skimming along your arms and his warm body pressed against yours was mixing dangerously with the night that was in it to reignite old feelings you'd long thought dead and buried.  And it seemed he was feeling them too.

Continuing to caress your body as he had long ago and remind you of why the two of you had been so good together, his lips now resting against your ear and the secret they told couldn't even seem to break the spell he had over you.  For the dress and the tickets it seemed had only been part of his present ... your party here tonight was completely free.  Calling in some favors while throwing his name and money around, his offer to host the party had apparently been far too generous for your girl friends to pass up, but where did that leave you now?

Turning you to face him now as his lips continued to leave a trail of warmth in their wake, Ransom dropping to his knees again as his hands now rested on your hips should have told you enough about what he had planned, but it seemed he wanted to leave no doubt.  "Do you know how long I've waited to do this?  By the time I'm done with you, you'll be ruined for anyone else," he stated and while your brain told you to protect your heart and push him away, his lips meeting your core as your ripped panties landed somewhere on the floor was all it took for your rational self to shut down while your body took you on a trip down memory lane.

For the man had skills and time had in no way diminished them or the memory of what he could do.

Holding you to him now as his teeth nipped at your lips while his tongue worked its way into your core, his nose now rubbing against your bundle of nerves should have been enough to send you into a sex induced frenzy, but the fun was just beginning.  Placing your own hands on his head now as you pushed him closer in the hopes of reaching the release that was just waiting beyond the edge, Ransom humming against your core now while flexing his fingers against your ass proved to be the final nail that truly did you in.  Moaning out above him now as the tremors from your core spread outwards, he lapped up all the nectar you had to give him and then some as his tongue continued to fuck you through the high until your body couldn't take any more and threatened to collapse on the floor beside him.  But it seemed he was prepared for that too.

Rising to his feet now a little too gracefully for someone who had just done what he had done, you soon found yourself face down atop his desk with the trust fund prick folded atop you in a manner that normally would have sent your temper into overdrive.  But now it was something else entirely that was off the scale and you knew, despite your better judgment, that Ransom would deliver.  You just had no idea what exactly that entailed.

Returning his mouth to yours now as his lips devoured every moan, gasp and whimper you produced, a belt noising behind you along with his actions proved enough of a distraction that you failed to see his hand reach out towards the box on the desk once more and remove something you hadn't yet discovered.  But that didn't mean you were about to remain oblivious however.  Continuing to shower you with kisses as his lips now whispered words of love and adoration while his fingers returned to your aching core once more, another two orgasms ripped from your center and a whole new side of Ransom Drysdale was revealed to you.  Whether you liked it or not.

Returning to your body now following the highs that had pretty much rocked your world and sapped you of the strength you could do with now, a firm object moving between your lips, getting covered in your juices should have told you something was off, but it seemed Ransom had done his job well.  Too well in fact.  Exhausted and distracted now from three of the most intense orgasms your body had experienced since leaving this trust fund prick behind, it wasn't until the cool air hit the crack of your ass and a strange pressure settled there that your brain grasped what was going on.  But by then it was too late.

Having worked you over enough and stimulated you to the point where your whole body was now one giant pliable muscle to be manipulated as he saw fit, the plug, lubricated sufficiently from your previous releases, slid home easily with just the most minor discomfort on your part.  Discomfort Ransom now meant to work out of you.  Shushing your protests and profanities now as his left hand still easily held your body flush against his desk, his right hand now grabbed hold of his equipment and running it leisurely through your folds, coated himself well until your struggling ceased and a different type of movement began.  For it seemed your body still craved him despite what your mind led you to believe.  And he was nothing if not someone who aimed to please.

Teasing you, and perhaps himself, a little longer now until your begging finally sent shockwaves towards his own overstimulated package, his length sliding home now in one powerful thrust made both of you realize a startling truth that would have to be discussed at a later and more rational time ... neither one of you was complete without the other.

Oh sure, this was just sex and the more time you spent around each other the more you argued about the smallest of things.  But moving back against him now as his cock thrust deep within you, hitting all those delicious spots only Ransom ever could, both you working together and egging each other on was what made you the perfect fit for each other.  You challenged each other.  Fought to push the other higher and farther than either could alone.  Forced each other out of your comfort zones because you alone saw the talent and potential in the other and couldn't stand to see it going to waste.

Hell, even finding a moment of clarity now when Ransom flipped you over onto your back and placed your legs above his shoulders as the tip of his penis kissed your cervix, you remembered clearly a recently forgotten memory of you defending the ass to a co-worker when you were sure your feelings for him had long since scattered on the breeze.  It seemed he wasn't as easy to get over as you had previously thought.

Leaving this thought behind however and coming back to the moment now as you begged Ransom to fuck you harder, the man groaned above you but nonetheless gave in to your demands without fail.  Pulling his length almost all the way out now before bending down to capture your lips, a devilish smirk gracing his features should have told you trouble was brewing but you didn't have time to question what it might be when his hand snaked down to touch the plug and a powerful vibration shattered your soul at the exact same moment Ransom buried his shaft within you once more.

Screaming to the heavens now as the man above you competed with the vibrating toy wedged firmly up your forbidden opening, orgasm after orgasm blended together just as yours and Ransom's voices did and by the time he had finished depositing his load within your lady garden, his promise had been fulfilled.  No other man would ever satisfy you after this and when you opened your eyes on the world once more, he would prove it to you all over again until the message got through.

You were his and he was yours ... from this breath until the last.

[the-teddy-bear-butch]

the vitriol for light mode is so valid. tell me about your poor little meow meow blorbo from dnd if you so wish

WAHOO

You know that TikTok audio from the Lego movie where the astronaut wants to build a space ship and he’s like “you’re not gonna tell me no” or whatever? Me rn :3 Apologies in advance for the long rant but!! You did technically ask for it hehe

ANYWAY, technically none of them are *my* poor little meow meow blorbos because I’m the Dungeon Master!! But I am genuinely obsessed with all of them

@haaawaiianshirt plays Delilah, an aasimar path of the beast barbarian. She was born and raised in a religious commune type situation before running away after being responsible for the death of a friend, and then being adopted by a sheriff in a small town. She later became his deputy, but they can’t outrun their past. The god this commune worshipped, Omen, is reaching out, and it seems he has some sort of plan for her that she does NOT want to be a part of. They’re also reflavored so that their path of the beast forms aren’t tail, claws, whatever, it’s cherub, seraphim, and throne form!! Which we got to work on together and I think it’s really cool. Emmie jokes I have shared custody of Delilah hehe, and I’ve probably done the most writing for her thus far

@suwunnysideup is playing Belladonna, a reborn tiefling grave cleric (with a bonus level in fighter!)!! They were raised from death by an evil cult called the Order of the Rotting Eye, which serves a rival god to Omen called Char’gothikon. Their past is intrinsically linked to Delilah’s, but both characters are still figuring out how. She’s recent been revealed to have more than one soul piloting their body, and are under the influence of something dark. They are currently trying to rescue their wife, Aasharni, from the clutches of the Order, who are demanding powerful Relics in return. She is also a werewolf, as of session two! They are the sweetest ever. They’re also 7 feet tall and we’re all really normal about it

@daughterofdrearburh is Nora Elliot, a rough around the edges “human” (werecoyote) ranger!! Her specific subclass has yet to be revealed in game, but she has abilities somehow related to other dimensions. A group called the Horizon Walkers, also servants of Omen, have made their connection to her known, and are seemingly trying to recruit her. She’s a terrible little beast and we all love her so dearly. She’s best friends with Morgan, and grew up in the same town as Delilah, but she can be a little aloof. She doesn’t like to trust people, and recently got shot by Morgan (under a vampiric charm) and lost the one bit of trust she had placed in anyone. Also she died and came back with black eyes but that went away so I’m sure it’s fine

@ninthhousesteel is playing Ruewen Simber, another normal human!! She’s a fighter, champion archetype, only she somehow has access to spare the dying and was able to use a scroll, despite “not being a spellcaster.” She was a socially awkward farm girl who didn’t even believe in monsters before joining the group and quickly having to confront that fact. She discovered a not at all cursed sword that was later revealed to in some way be connected to Char’gothikon. Also, she died in one session, but returned without the help of revivify—but with dark veiny scarring across her shoulder that appears to be spreading…

@candle-lion plays everyone’s favorite unethical evil lesbian, Doctor Morgan Lancaster. She’s a doctor who Jekyll and Hyde’d herself. She’s a “shifter” circle of the moon druid with a few levels in artificer. She was a doctor in a town called Dusty Springs, which was terrorized by vampires from a coven called the Onyx Eye Coven for many years. She has a HUGE vendetta against vampires, and is damn determined to exterminate every single one she sees. In an effort to become stronger and protect people, she made an experimental serum, which turned her into a monster. During times of stress, at will, or occasionally at random, she transforms into a “bad taxidermy wolf monster” but apparently mostly maintains control. She’s looking for a cure for herself, and recently discovered she too is somehow connected to Char’gothikon.

@lavenderlevetan is a petty vampire and we fucking love her. Seraphina is a half elf now vampire and she’s a fighter as well!! She has canonically killed 1000+ people over 20 years of being a vampire!! But she specifically chooses to go after bounties, and specifically those that list “wanted dead or alive.” She’s actually the nicest person ever until you (Morgan) give her a reason to be petty. She’s also the most charming of the group and her expertise in persuasion has made her mvp of multiple sessions. She was dragged into this mess while trying to find a missing person for a bounty, and thus far has yet to discover why her specifically, when it seems every other character is here for a Reason

Morgan and Seraphina hate each other and they want to kiss about it so bad. When any of us post about morphine, that’s them LMAO. Deliladonna is obviously Delilah and Belladonna. Norue are the slowest slow burn ever

And while I’m the DM and don’t have a PC, I do have a special little guy NPC that I’m a little obsessed with. Her name is Brozi and she’s a half orc way of mercy monk. She was Delilah’s best friend (and for some time, girlfriend) after the aasimar arrived in Sawtooth City and together they were the worst teenagers ever. Brozi isn’t going with the party, but she and Delilah are still very close, and their goodbye will be hard. While Delilah is gone, they get to achieve their lifelong dream of opening a bakery 🫶

In any case. Cowboy dykes. With horror. Themes of free will, losing control, found family, and learning to trust and overcome prejudice. The friendship dynamics took everyone by surprise. Belladonna and Seraphina are undead besties. Ruewen and Seraphina play go fish. Delilah and Morgan are slowly fixing each other. Nora and Morgan are also fixing each other. Morgan is super protective of Ruewen and it’s very sweet. I would die for any one of them. I’m obsessed with them a healthy amount.

This is the party 🫶

(In order left to right: Morgan, Seraphina, Belladonna, Delilah, Ruewen, Nora)

[jonathankatwhatever]

I was wandering around yesterday thinking about numbers: what is a number? What do they mean by transcendental? I could see some translations fairly well, notably that rationals are both 1 in I//I, that alternating series generate out of 1 and 0 in I//I, and that both 0’s in I//I are something else. I was thinking about this from the perspective of cardinality, so the first is finite, the second is countably infinite, and the third is uncountable. You can see why 0//0 is uncountable in the notation for it: it’s the reverse of that which determines, which reduces the D-structure to that labelable value or point or End that we call a number, especially but not limited to a counting numeral.

I’m stunned how easy it is while typing to drop the not. That’s because there is meaning in that not limited, so when you remove it, then we have the full abstraction to just a numeral, which can be used to say polynomial this numeral because algebraic numbers are countable. You can see why, I hope (typed dope): an algebraic number is in a single variable and is a root, which literally says that we are constructing a number in grid squares, which of course we are. Algebraic numbers literally construct in grid squares, so they must be constrained, meaning finite, to an extent, and that quality of finiteness is the restriction to countable out of uncountable. So we can say that algebraic numbers, like the conceptions of a limit - referring to the epsilon-delta formulation but also more - are 1//0 and 0//1 constructed. That sentence stirred a lot of imagery, but it won’t come into words.

You can see then that 0//0 is uncountable because it doesn’t come to 1 but is infinite. This means every count carries with it that truth, which can then be restricted to countable or finite, which takes that out of 0//0 to perhaps 1//1.

This is really amazing stuff. I love how this reads, how it looks, how it sounds in my mind. I’m really tapped these days more and more and more into the truth. I wandered around thinking, got some ideas, woke up, and the answers were ready for me to type. This has always been the case, but these answers are deep. I’m used to getting images I could barely translate. Or a sense of something that took hours or days of intensity to pull together. I haven’t been out of bed for 45 minutes. All I’ve done is feed the birds and change the cat food bag. I went down the driveway to feel the sun. I’ve been sitting for maybe 20 minutes, and I suddenly have this understanding of the number structure that I didn’t have yesterday. Like a new module has been loaded into my processor.

BTW, that bothers: the HAL9000 series would need to make a mistake because floating point arithmetic is not infinitely deep, and every now and then some process gets cut off which would have risen up a different path in the D-structure, and you get a false sensor reading. What bothers me is that they didn’t need this device to do the movie. HAL could simply have observed the relative human incompetence, and made a decision. But why then not cut the oxygen off in the ship? That’s what I love about Kubrick: he does such a great job of creating the sensation of reality when it’s completely unreal. Like that absurd scene in Full Metal Jacket when the camera goes down the line of men, like it’s a WWII movie, except they’re modern soldiers speaking versions of truths we accept as real because it looks real, and the little bits are done in character so well, for a movie shot on an island in the Thames.

When I imagined a science fiction movie, it was always about romance underlying the adventure. But to be blunt, I think my conceptions were all versions of playing with you. Vivid memories of playing in caves, in adventure stories with you, and they often versions of where are what, what is going on, what have we figured out so far, so basically a role-playing game

I was just visualizing how VR can be useful in teaching. As in, have kids about to drive take lessons in VR headsets so they can learn how to judge traffic speed, how to make turns like lefts on to undivided roads, how to drive through an area with people. Imagine the VR training kids where to keep their eyes, how to notice danger, how to check a blind spot, etc.

I’d bet VR would be extremely useful in teaching young children who have coordination issues, both gross and fine motor. I think a number of problems could be solved by proper education, where education means finding and developing whatever tools are necessary to help.

Back to numbers. I hit a flipping place, a Complication was the notation, like the typing or not of not, at irrational numbers. I think that resolved above: irrational now clearly includes the transcendental and the algebraic.

So, I guess I can take a break. I expected this would be a difficult task. Oh wait, so the real numbers are now defined properly using the finite and infinite forms, all in the construction of grid squares through DC&R in D-structure. I’m impressed.

Forgot: it’s 8 April 2023.

——————

I’m thinking TREE(3) reflects Triangular. Makes sense that when TREE(2) ‘connects’ those 2 colors, that the 1 would then be another color, so that allows a 3 color function to run across Triangular. I’m not sure about this because I need to see how TREE(3) forms, but it should be true because then Triangular maps to a finite but immense form, one bigger than the universe by a lot.

———-

This appears to be correct. I forgot TREE(3) requires a common ancestor, which literally draws Triangulars.

And I think the issue with Graham’s number is that they’re ‘avoiding’ a full grid square, meaning the sides and hypotenuses connected, and that is the largest it can reach. I assume the G64 part, the massive iteration to that, is 2^6, but I’m not sure. All the material is enthralled by showing off how huge these numbers are.

[everafterkeiji]

Hi can i request a hcs for itadori,megumi and gojo react to their s/o death?.

Please Feel free to ignore this request if its triggering or u don't feel like writing it! Thank you<3

i love angst requests so it's really okay with me! thank you so much for requesting (ngl i did cry thinking abt yuji) and i hope u have a lovely day even if this was incredibly sad

𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐎 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇

PAIRINGS: JJK BOYS x gn!reader

CHARACTERS: Itadori Yuji, Megumi Fushiguro, & Gojo Satoru

WORD COUNT: 2.7K

WARNINGS: heavy angst, character death, mentions of blood and panic attacks, as well wounds and bruises. mentions of Shibuya arc/implied location in Shibuya during that arc.

⟡ 𝐈𝐓𝐀𝐃𝐎𝐑𝐈 eyes dared to erase the sight ahead of him, his body was frozen—every sense began to fail for its purpose and nothing else was responsive except for the shout of your name that echoes through the battle field, the level of immensity to his voice that covers his throat with pain as every pace towards you was a step leading to a waste of a second that terrifies him the more his being tugged away by his own fears.

Dropping to his knees, he was numb to the sensation of the ache overwhelming his legs while he craddles you in his arms as every part of him shook with uncertainty, his hands didn't have the courage to hold you with as much as strength as he should've.

"..Y/N?" He whispers, a croak to his voice as if it was barely alive with droplets created from his sorrow began to trail down your cheek whilst your blood paints his hand in a hue he never expected to come from you. His mind was in the midst of being empty to a havoc that wanted to deny every rage in his system so he could love you even if he could tell how your chest wasn't rising the way it was supposed to do.

"Love?" Yuji calls out one more time as your eyes flutter subtly, signalling him not even an assurance for your state. His hand falls to your cheek, not caring if he couldn't hold you weakly because what matters more is that you held onto him. He painfully leans his forehead on yours, a loud sob escaping him with a struggle to catch up with his breath.

"Don't let me go, don't ever leave me, I beg of you, God!" He shouts as the gods grow concerned of the boy whose heart was wrecked to every piece as the sky began to cry with him. "Save them— God— Please! Stop taking everyone that I love and let me come with them." He begs, as he pulls you more as if the distance could've helped him better because even when you were close to him, he knew you were already at the farthest place that he couldn't reach. All that could be heard from him were screams where he forfeited ever begging for your life when everyone around seems to follow in your path.

"I'm so sorry, my love." Itadori confesses, arms tight around your figure as every beat of his heart began to die with you when all the seconds that he seemed to waste without you by his side began to haunt him. If he had gotten there sooner, maybe then he could've reminded you one more time that you were the energy—the surviving light in his life for him to exist without being told of his faith.

"I love you—so much so please remember that even when you're away." He couldn't even explain how his words manage to fall in such a manner, he could've sworn a second ago he only wanted to let time freeze so he could deny the view of your lifeless body that he miserably failed to save from the hands of death.

"I promise you, in the end, I'll be with you soon, Y/N." Itadori places a delicate kiss to your forehead, having no courage to leave the contact of your skin to his as his eyes went with the rain that poured over the two of you. He intertwines one of his hands with yours, shivering at the temperature he faces but with the other hand, he rests it on his cheek. Maybe if you looked at him now, you'd want him to smile because if you were the source of his reason to exist, Yuji's smile was the one to let your hearts worries disappear but sadly, the source has been removed from him and nothing else in the world could ever bring the joy in his smile no more.

"All I've ever wanted to do was to love you, so I hope you're willing to wait because when I see you.. I'm gonna embrace you with everything I've got," He then kisses the hand intertwined to his before he achingly pull his hand away and the regret closing on him but he had no other choice.

"And love you again and again, Y/N. Always and.. forever—like what we promised." Yuji, as torturous it was to let you go, he sets your hand that was on his cheek to your chest just like he did with the other before he ends his goodbye with a lasting kiss to your cheek.

"Stop crying, Yuji! C'mon smile for me, will you? I didn't come here to see you all gloomy."

And with the remaining memories left for him, it began to be the weak strings for his heart to compose itself because if he knows one thing that you hated, it was the sight of him crying.

So he smiles, the everlasting wish of yours being granted even if his body was corrupting as the love of his life enters a new realm where forever was possible for the both of you.

"We'll meet again, my love."

As he stood up, he hesitates to turn his back on you but once he does, the sun never looked the same to him ever again.

⟡ 𝐌𝐄𝐆𝐔𝐌𝐈 encounters a feeling that he's been through before—a course of emotions that has his body in a tight hold but now, it seems the hold on him was deadlier than the first time. Your name had left his lips, draining him of his exhaustion to run to you before you could fall, every fiber in his body was holding on to his fear. He didn't need to feel the ache in his legs that were covered in wounds because his mission was for you to perfectly land in his arms even if he had to risk getting more injuries.

His heart began to pace in frantic pace when he catches you, there wasn't a split second of joy that entered him just because he made it in time. Instead, his eyes widen in trauma at the sight of your dull eyes that looked above to the heavens sky.

"Hey—hey!" He shouts, trembling hands feeling every bit of your skin and ends with it down to your cheek. "Talk to me—anything, please!" Megumi pleads as a drop of your blood that came from your forehead started to flow onto his skin. He gulps with his breathing unable to coordinate with him as his head frenetically looks up, any sign of help could've been the better reach but they were just in the mere corner of a building in Shibuya.

"Y/N? Please say something." He whispers, furiously wiping his tears while he despises the warmth of your blood that paints his hands. "C'mon please, let me hear your voice one last time." He sobs on your shoulder, embracing you with every corrupting piece of his heart, looking for a beat from your rather cold ones. His hands go to your hair, caressing it so lightly that he felt it resembled glass from how careful he was. Your head was buried in his neck, eyes barely awake for him to ever find that heartbeat.

"I love you, did you hear me?" Megumi says, gulping in the grief. "Say it back to me like you always did, please?" He doesn't know that begging would've been his lasting choice—maybe someone up above would take some time to listen to his pleads and eventually bring the life to his lovers body once again for you to say you love him back a thousand times more.

"Hug me one more time, will you? You told me you loved to do that." He desperately wishes your arms could just return to the place he loved, wrapped around his neck as his hands were to be on your waist or to your cheek with a smile to your lips. Unfortunately, your arms were covered in their own bruises—latched with dark purple hues and tints of red from the debris of buildings and cursed spirits.

"We have to go, Megumi!" One of the sorcerers shout, he didn't even have the time to decipher who it belonged to but he sniffles, reaching for his phone typing a quick message to the others to be able to take you out of this place with somewhere more deserving of a beauty that has passed.

"I'm not going to say goodbye because I know you'll always be with me, right Y/N?" He takes your hands, placing it on your chest on top of each other as his tear lands on your temple. He softly wipes it away before he kisses your forehead, closing his eyes shut at his misery.

"I wish I could've saved you. I really wish I did." He sobs, forehead in tact with yours but he seems to receive a sensation to his body at the wind that came his way.

"You've saved me the minute you met me, my love." You wish you could've whispered to him but he took it as the wind was the only embrace he'll ever get now.

"And you saved me too." Panda walks in to this horrid scene as he feels the sympathy rush to him. Megumi looks up at him with the liveliness dying along with you as your lover delicately holds your cheek one last time before kissing you on your temple muttering one more time,

"I love you always."

Standing up was the second hardest thing he had to do because turning his back to you came at first as his knees threatened to fall but alas, he has to do continue on because that's what you would've wanted right?

"I love you, Megumi. I'll be here waiting for you."

And the upcoming battles for him to face were laced with rage and the never ending bitterness that love seemed to haunt him with.

⟡ 𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎's phone rang as while he stops to stare at the caller. It was odd for him to receive a phone call from Megumi at this hour but he supposed it was probably for some guidance since they were sent to a mission. Being aware of their location, he didn't hesitate to transport as fast as he could to get there but there's this calling to him how it wasn't bound to be what he expected.

Panting heavily, Megumi ran with life on the line as he carried you in his arms without the ability to pace your breathing the same as his.

"GOJO-SENSEI!" He shouts with every power in his lungs the second Gojo had appeared, who stood stunned at the boy who was approaching him with a familiar figure.

"Y/N?" Satoru says, uncertain of what he just saw but when Megumi reached him, out of his breath as Nobara and Itadori followed behind him. His student places you in your lovers arm as he kneels down with a hand to your chest, alarmed at how your heartbeat was nowhere near notice. Fushiguro could see the worry in the mans eyes as he bites his lip in sympathy before telling the two to spare a moment for the so called strongest sorcerer who was now on his knees for only one person.

"We saw them being followed by a cursed spirit but they led Y/N to a trap." Megumi briefly explains as Gojo could only spare him a nod as your eyes would flutter once a while as the three students let them be.

"I warned you, didn't I?" He says, a low whisper as your hand weakly reach for his blindfold while Gojo's own rhythm of a heartbeat began to ache. Once he felt how you raised it with a cough of blood spoiling his uniform as his expression grow more frantic with every second.

"Hey there, pretty. You mind staying with me for a little longer?" He asked as if your ears were as attentive as it were before when his eyes stared back at your dazed ones. You didn't respond which was troubling him, what more was that your hand immediately dropped to your chest when he finally looked at you. A shakey sigh leaves Gojo while he rose, ready to fly you anywhere as long as you promised to stay.

"A little more please, can you do that for me?" He begs of you but instead, your head fell unconsciously in his arms with the threat of your eyes to close before he could ever look at you again, not too mention the flow of blood that came from your stomach that didn't seem to stop. He hasn't had the confidence to look at your body before because the fear on Megumi's face made him certain of how the damage had been rough on you. Up this close, he can see two massive wounds to your lower body as well as scratches on your forearms with some bruises on your wrist, hinting how their grasp on you was too strong compared to someone who was powerless.

The hue of his eyes appear to be less saturated than before and for the first time in the life of the honored sorcerer, his heart was irreparable and no amount of technique can reverse the way love his love for you had been the fault for your end.

Unknown to his own senses, his tears fall to your cheek as he pulls you closer like an embrace that didn't bring him his usual amount of comfort.

"Satoru, stop messing around!" You said as he spun you around, tight arms around his neck as he flew in the air, not bothering to listen to your protests of putting you down.

"I won't let you go, how could I ever do that to you?" He assures you, with his own arms tied to your waist with a bright smile on his face.

"And if I fall?" You asked him, glancing at the heights below you but Gojo only tucks a piece of hair behind your ear as you looked at him with the sun in your eyes since two lovers were up in the sky to reach for the clouds.

"I'll be there to save you."

But where was he when you fell from the skyscrapers?

"You hate me, I'm sure." He says biting his lip in agony as he buries his head to your chest, silent sobs and unsteady breaths coming from the sorcerer.

"I love you so much." Satoru breathlessly said. The head that was once on your chest began to move away when he heard nothing more than the silence that came from your heart. They were out to get you, how stupid was he to let you out of his sight just for a second? Maybe then he could've danced with you one more time, up in the sky for the two of you to conquer the heights of being in love.

"I'm so sorry, darling." He then kisses the side of your lip as his feet met in contact with the floor as the rest of the Jujutsu tech as Shoko lets out a saddened sigh.

"Wait for me okay? I'm not done loving you yet." He whispers to you one last time while he hands you over to Shoko as Megumi spares him a glance to notice how wretched his mentor looked.

"I have some things to do." Gojo announces, withstanding the grief to plot revenge to the ones who took you away from him as the rest didn't bother to object knowing there was no possible way to stop a man who had lost the love of his life in revenging your death. He disappears in a split second as the rest of the students didn't notice the tears that kept flowing from the person they look up to.

How can he be the strongest when he failed to protect his only weakness?

Until then, Gojo Satoru could only look at the sky to remember you since his infinity that he swore was to be spent with you died in his arms along with his lover.

[glowingbadger]

I loved the Ashe, Sylvain, and Hilda modern-day HCs. So….can I ask for….Marianne, Dima, and Claude now? They’re so so good.

Here's a quick list of the places I've touched on ModernAU stuff with these characters before, for anyone who's interested! General Modern HCs (Dimitri) W/ insecure Reader (Claude, Dimitri) W/ insecure Reader (Marianne) Soft HCs (Dimitri)

I'll try not to repeat myself too much, but the SFW portion might be a little sparse because I've written a good deal of my thoughts on that already :3

Marianne, Dimitri, Claude x GN Reader

Modern/College AU headcanons

SFW (not sfw under the cut)

Marianne:

- Definitely a veterinary student who has an incredible, intuitive way with animals. One of those "gets along with animals better than people" types. As a result, many others in her classes see her as aloof or difficult to talk to. Fortunately, when Hilda drags her to a party one night, you notice her keeping to herself and come to make casual conversation. It takes a bit for her to open up, but she's soon grateful for pleasant, relaxing company in the midst of the loud chaos.

- She needs a good amount of reassurance in a relationship, as she's so convinced you could do better. Marianne is totally the type to apologize for not being good enough for you, then apologize for bringing it up, then apologize for apologizing. But her love and admiration for you are so very clear. She'll shyly take your hand in hers, and just the way she looks at you, it's like you're every star and every sunset she's ever seen.

- Marianne spends some of her free time volunteering at a local animal shelter, and one of your earlier dates would involve her introducing you to some of the animals in her care. Here, it's like you see a completely different side of her- she's so much more confident and firm when she speaks to the animals, and she smiles so brightly and laughs adorably as she watches you attempt to make a good impression on them.

Dimitri:

- We've chatted about Modern! Dimitri a good deal so far- but I will double down here on the fact that, while he's outwardly extremely intimidating to your friends when you first start dating, you know (and they learn) that he's absolute Malewife material.

- He loves sitting on video calls with you and just staring at your adorable, lovely face. He's an excellent listener, and will gladly hear about your entire day from start to finish, even if you insist it was nothing special. He's just so soothed by your voice, and the chance to see you. While he's honestly not very good at social media in general, he does have a couple hundred pictures of you saved. Not to post anywhere, just to look back at with a goofy grin on his face.

Claude:

- Claude is the guy on campus that everyone likes, plenty of people want, but no one can really nail down. He seems to know everyone, but he's only actually close to a few good friends, and for the longest time, even they assume that he's the "doesn't believe in serious dating" type. It starts much the same with you- he figures you're interesting and cute as hell, so he may as well spend some time having fun and getting to know you. And then... the feels TM creep in.

- You'll be caught up in a sort of... friendly flirtation with him for a while. The kind where it would be easy to play off all of the corny innuendos and knowing glances as "just kidding around." Then, one night, after a long group study session or just lazing around with drinks and games with his friends, he offers to walk you back to your dorm. When you get caught in a sudden downpour and have to duck under the nearest building's awning for shelter, he gives you a strange lingering look that's so much heavier than any you've seen. And without a word, he leans down to kiss you. When you part, he's wearing a slanted smile, but he's fidgeting a bit when he says, "Hey, uh, Y/N. I wanna be with you- for real. So uh... how 'bout it?"

- Claude is just the most fun boyfriend ever. He's got an active and curious mind, so he's always game to try anything you're interested in, and you'll never be at a loss for date ideas. He's the kind who gets okay grades, though nothing incredible, but his brilliance shines in how he latches on to new information, turning a topic around in his mind until he's seen it from every angle. It's especially charming when he asks to hear about your interests or areas of expertise- he asks all the right questions and the conversation becomes lively just about instantly.

NSFW 18 + v

Marianne:

- You're definitely her first sexual partner (she hasn't even dated seriously until you), and she's going to take a long time to get comfortable freely exploring the physical side of a relationship. She's a big cuddler, once you've assured her that you like it too- she finds it immensely soothing to rest her head on your shoulder or on your chest, just listening to your breathing and feeling you warm against her. But as for sexual affection, she'll start slow, testing things by letting her gentle hands tentatively wander just a little further than before, or deepening your kiss a little more than usual.

- Best practice with Marianne is to let her be the one to suggest or initiate things, but to respond enthusiastically when she does so she knows you're happy with it and you want her as much as she wants you. Your approval and encouragement fills her with warmth she's never felt before, and a sense of bold desire she hadn't even known she was capable of. There's plenty of communication with her- there has to be -but in a way, that becomes its own sort of eroticism. Soft murmurs of, "is this okay?", "does that feel good?", or "can you take more?" mix in with affirmative sighs and moans, turning the negotiation of comfort into a wonderful, slowly escalating path towards satisfaction.

- She's absolutely mortified by the idea of sexting or sending nudes, but if she sends you an outfit she's considering and reply with a coy "You look amazing- can't wait to take that off of you" (honestly the cheesier the better with the pickup lines- being too smooth would intimidate her)- she'll only respond with a single blushing emoji, but you bet she'll be wearing that outfit to your next date.

Dimitri:

- Everyone on campus, including your friends/roomates see Dimitri as such a pure cinnamon roll that you might be surprised to learn he has a rather healthy sex drive underneath all of that sweetness and affection. Granted, he's definitely most likely to desire you when he feels emotionally close to you- but that won't stop him from fucking you nice and deep until your bed creaks. The first time someone overhears you practically screaming out his name, rumors start spreading that your ever-devoted Malewife is actually legendary in bed. It's mostly a raunchy joke, but as far as you're concerned, they're not exactly wrong.

- He's too nervous to actually save any of the spicy pics you've sent him to his phone, but that doesn't stop him from regularly scrolling back through your message threads to find them. Masturbating to porn is fine and good, but when he can look at you biting your lip as you show off your body to him, he pumps his cock and bucks his hips against his hand until he cums far harder than he's used to. Dimitri especially gets a thrill out of the implied part of this- the fact that you wanted to flaunt yourself to him like this and made sure that he would linger on the sight of you.

- A very fun game is to comment or imply something about how good Dimitri fucks you while you're hanging out with his friends. He stammers and turns bright red when you mention how, "Oh don't you worry, Dimitri keeps me nice and satisfied, don't you babe?" with your eyebrows quirked playfully. His buddies nudge him and laugh, and as timid as he appears about it, he'll need you as soon as you're alone together, and he'll hold you extra close and pound into you a little harder than usual.

Claude:

- Alright. Claude is hot, and Claude knows he's hot, and he has no problem using this to his advantage. He'll absolutely send you gym selfies, or raunchy messages when he knows you're with friends or family. During minor disagreements or when you're pretending to be mad at him, he'll slip an arm around your waist and nibble at your ear, whispering, "C'mon babe, don't be like that..." before pulling you close and kissing you until you can't think straight.

- He absolutely doesn't care if people overhear you- in fact, he'll tease you about it, murmuring in your ear that you can't keep moaning for him like that or you'll be heard. But the fact that he's fucking into you harder and deeper as he says it tells you clearly that he wants you to cry out for him. In general, he's pretty shameless about your shared sex life if you allow him to be. He'll practically strut out of your room to clean up in just his boxers, not caring a bit if your roommates get an eyeful. He's handsy in public as well (again, depending on your comfort with it), and will absolutely grab a handful of your ass while you're on a date together, or trail his hand up your thigh during a movie.

- Claude is adventurous and open minded about sex in general, as I've mentioned a couple times. Hell, he'll even send you a porn clip or a bit of smut, along with a brief "we should try this ;)"- and he obviously loves when you do the same for him. He sees no reason to be shy with his partner about your mutual pleasure. Communicating your preferences will make sure you both enjoy yourselves, and the process of even talking about it can be pretty hot on its own.

[inagetawaycarxo]

Beneath The Surface [COMPLETE SERIES]

Pairings: Adam Cole x Reader, Kyle O’Reilly x Reader, Bobby Fish x Reader, Roderick Strong x Reader, Jay Halstead x Reader [Sibling], Will Halstead x Reader [Sibling], Connor Rhodes x Reader [LI], Austin Smith x Reader, Mob!Boss!Roman Reigns x Reader

Featuring: Y/n, Connor Rhodes, Jay Halstead, Will Halstead, Hank Voight, Kim Burgess,  Kyle O’Reilly, Bobby Fish, Rhys, Carson, Mr Williams, Norah Williams, Kevin Atwater, Austin Smith [OC], Roman Reigns, Jey Uso, Antonio Dawson, Adam Ruzek.

Summary: A small town is rocked by a case of a woman with amnesia, who is she? what happened to her? What is she hiding?

Warnings: involves abuse, violence, blood, whumps, firefighting stuff I got wrong, police stuff I got wrong, medical things I got wrong, medical stuff, light angst, Adam being douche, secrets, errors I missed, PTSD, nightmares, flashbacks, angst, blood, violence, drama, mentions of kidnapping, character death, death, car crash.

w/c; 17523

The tree branches scraped against your skin as you ran through the woods. All battered and bruised. Finding it difficult to see out of your left eye it was swollen. You found it hard to breathe as well. Your lungs felt like they were on fire, but you kept pushing yourself to run. You couldn’t stop now, you had to run.

Hope sparked inside of you as you saw a barn. Quickly running over to the barn as best as you could.

Slipping under the wooden fence. Sucking in a deep breath, pain rippled through your body. but you pushed through. Walking up to the door of the barn. Your hand resting on the door, sliding it open.

You quickly entered the barn. Closing the door behind you. The barn smelled like manure, animals, feed, silage, and wood all mixed together. You made your way over to a hay bale, sitting down on it. You carefully laid down. The barn wasn’t occupied by animals. Your eyes slowly closed, as you winced in pain. Your head was killing you. Every limp in your body felt like it was on fire. Your vision slowly fading into black…

“Dad, I’m sure the animals will be fine,” The daughter of the elderly man huffed out.

“Just want to check on them, they are a new herd of cattle I want to see how they are settling in,” He spoke. Getting up. Walking over to the front door. Taking his coat off the hook near the door. He slipped it on. Slipping into his gumboots. He grabbed the lantern. Grabbing his matches out of his pocket and lighting the lantern. He put the match out. Putting it down on the hallway table. Grabbing his rifle that was in the corner. Slinging the armband that was attached to the rifle over his shoulder.

“They were fine ten minutes ago when you checked on them again,” His daughter sighed. As her father opened the door. Exiting the farmhouse. Ignoring his daughter.

He held the lantern up in front of him. The fire lightening his path. Eyebrows furrowing as he heard his animals make sounds of distress.

“It’s okay,” He reassured them. Not that it worked. He then proceeds to locate what got them so spooked.

Eyes widening in slight fear, as he saw a coyote stalking outside of his barn. He put the lantern down, so he could fire his rifle.

He aimed at the coyote. Pulling the trigger. The sound of the gun breaking through the air. This seemed to cause his daughter to panic rushing out of the house. While her father picked up the lantern. Running over to the coyote to see if he got it. The coyote quickly ran away, fleeing the scene without a trace of a bullet wound.

The elderly man let out a sigh. Looking at the barn.

His eyes widen as he saw a bloody handprint smudged on the door. Taking slow steps he walked to the door. Hand pressing against the door, he slides it open. Heart pounding faster.

The moonlight lit up the barn. What he saw next made his heart speed up. He clutched his chest with his hand, dropping the lantern in the process. Causing it to fall on the floor. Breaking the glass. The fire spread across the hay scatted on the ground, as the elderly man fell to his knees, holding his chest tightly as he had a heart attack. The image of a bloody, beaten-up woman laying on his hay bale was too much for him.

“DAD,” His daughter screamed as she saw the barn light up with fire. She quickly sprinted back to the house. Tearing the front door open. Rushing over to the landline. She picked the cordless phone up. Quickly dialing 9-1-1. Holding the phone up to her ear, rushing back outside.

“9-1-1, what’s your emergency?” The emergency operator spoke.

“HELP ME! My father, he is in the barn and it’s on fire,” She gasped out. Her voice was full of panic.

“What’s your address?” the emergency operator asked. Typing away on a keyboard.

“I… Oh my god,” The women gasped out, as the fire grew larger. She was too shocked to speak. The emergency operator quickly tracked the women’s location. Informing the fire department and the ambulance department.

“Ma’am, help is on the way,” The emergency operator spoke. Only to hear the sound of the phone dropping and a loud cry…

The smell of smoke invaded your nostrils, waking you up. Your eyes widen in panic as you saw fire. You quickly got off the hay bale, rushing to find a way out of this barn, unfortunately, you inhaled too much smoke, making you collapse to the ground…

The sound of the fire siren, as well as an ambulance siren, got louder as they drove up the driveway. The fire rig stopping near the barn. While the ambulance stopped a bit behind the fire truck.

The daughter of the elderly man rushed over to them.

Kyle and Bobby rushed out of the rig. Putting their oxygen mask on and tanks on their backs, before rushing into the building. While the other firefighters rolled the hose out, turning the nozzle on. releasing water.

Bobby and Kyle saw an elderly man laying on the ground. Bobby checked his pulse. Kyle looked around the barn, seeing another figure.

“Bobby there’s another one in here,” Kyle spoke. Pointing at a figure.

“I’ll get him out, and you go get her,” Bobby ordered. Kyle nodded. Carefully walking over to the figure. While Bobby picked the guy up, pulling him out of the building.

Kyle gasped as he took in the figure. It was a woman. Her face was littered with scratches. Not only was her face littered with scratches but there was blood on her face. he put two and two together, they were keeping this woman hostage.

He quickly picked her up carefully, walking out of the building. Glaring at the woman and the guy in the stretcher. Bobby looked up.

“Oh my god,” Bobby gasped out.

The woman looked up from her father. The other paramedic saw Kyle take another victim out. Rushing over to the back of the ambulance van, taking out another stretcher.

“Where you holding her captive?” Kyle spat out. As the other paramedic bought the stretcher over to Kyle. Kyle placed the woman delicately down on the stretcher. While the other paramedic checked the women.

“What?” The daughter of the elderly guy gasped out.

“She’s going to have to go to the hospital, she has a collapsed lung, among other things,” The paramedic spoke. The other paramedic nodded.

Both of them taking you and the elderly man to the back of the ambulance van. Kyle following.

“I’ve never seen that woman in my life, let alone knew she was in the barn,” The women gasped out. Holding her father’s hand,

“Well, then your father knew, maybe tried to hide the evidence of his crime,” Kyle spat out. as they loaded you in then the elderly man. The women hopping in a well.

“I’m not leaving you alone with her,” Kyle growled out. hopping into the back of the ambulance van as well. One of the paramedics hopped in, while the other one shut the doors. Going over to the driver’s side. Opening the door and getting in. they closed the door. Starting the ambulance van, then switching the siren on as they speed off to the hospital. Pressing their foot hard on the pedal. All the while Kyle glared at the women. Praying the woman he thought that they abused was okay…

Kyle felt relief wash over him as the ambulance stopped in the emergency parking space.

The other paramedic rushing out of the driver’s side, opening the doors. Both of them taking out the stretchers.

“You are going to pay for this,” Kyle growled out before he exited the back of the ambulance van…

 • ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••   

Kyle could hear his heart beating as every second went by. His chest felt heavy with anxiety, as he waited for a doctor or nurse to tell him the condition of the woman he saved. Or at least give him some sort of update. He had been waiting in the waiting room for hours.

Other people who were waiting as well, came and left.

He should have been at work, but he couldn't. He had to know the condition of the woman he saved, or at least her name.

Kyle heard footsteps approaching. Relief washed over him. thinking it was a doctor coming to inform him of the condition of the woman he saved, when he looked up it was his friend Adam, who happened to be a detective. Coming over to him.  

“Hey,” Kyle spoke, sitting up straighter. As Adam stood in front of him.

“Heard you made quite a scene,” Adam spoke. Arching an eyebrow.

“Well, you would to if you found a battered and bruised woman in a barn, that was set ablaze, for all I know he was trying to cover his crime up,” Kyle grumbled out. Adam sat beside him.

“You don’t know that Mr. William isn’t that type of person,” Adam Sighed.

“People surprise you, Adam, you should know that,” Kyle grumbled. Adam just raised his eyebrow.

“Look Kyle I get you want to be a hero but you can't accuse someone especially a burn victim of abusing a woman, we haven’t heard the entire story yet,” Adam sighed.

“Like I said before people surprise you,” Kyle grumbled. Adam let out a long sigh. Resting his hand on Kyle's shoulder and squeezing it.

“Let the evidenced do the talking. Just stay out of it,” Adam warned. Letting go of Kyle’s shoulder and getting up. Leaving Kyle to glare at his back as he walked to the nurse's station. Asking the nurse where the room of the woman Kyle found was located in. The nurse quickly gave Adam the number for the room. Giving him a flirty smile. Adam smirked at her. Sending a wink her way as he walked off. walking to the room.

Adam pushed the door open. Smirking as he saw Doctor Rhodes.

“Connor,” Adam smirked. as he took a step forward. His eyes looking at the woman in the bed. She looked awful. There was a bandage wrapped around her head. A scatter of scratches on her face. her lip was busted, her left arm was in a sling, and her left eye was swollen.

“Cole,” Connor responded not looking up from the tablet. It was no secret Adam and Connor butted heads. Connor wasn’t Adam’s biggest fan, and Adam wasn’t Connor’s biggest fan either.

“So, how’s the patient? Is she going to wake up soon, hopefully sometime soon?” Adam asked. Making Connor’s jaw tighten. “She’s been through a lot, I put her induced coma, she’s lucky she’s even alive, she has a collapsed lung, broken arm, head trauma, not to mention…” Connor listed off only to get cut off by an impatient Adam.

“Yeah, yeah, just give her something to wake her up, so I can get answers out of her, then you can put her back in an induce comma,” Adam grumbled. Looking at Connor intensely. Connor’s jaw ticked.

Connor let out an annoyed huff. Putting the tablet down. giving Adam his full attention. His eyes were lit with fury. Blood boiling.

“Get out,” Connor shouted. Making Adam smirk.

“She’s a suspect,” Adam smirked. riling Connor up.

“She’s a victim, and she’s my patient, I’m not waking her up so you can grill her, come back when she actually wakes up,” Connor shouted. Nostrils flaring.

“Well, are you going to give me a set date on when you are going to take her out of the comma?” Adam asked.

“I’ll get one of the nurses to inform you when she wakes up on her own accord, till now leave,” Connor growled. Making  Adam smirk. He turned around walking out of the room.

Connor let out a sigh. Walking over to you. His face edged with worry. He took a hold of your hand. His thumb caressing the back of your hand. His other hand went to your wrist, tracing the tattoo on your wrist. he knew that tattoo, he was there when you got it. Connor sat down on your bed beside you. Eyes filling with worry.

“Oh, y/n, what happened to you?” He sighed.

“I should have never left Chicago,” He spoke again, with so much sadness in his voice….

 • ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••   

Connor starred at you intently. He had a feeling your ex might have caused this. Connor quickly let go of your hand when he heard the door to your room open. He quickly stood up. Pretending to look t the tablet. As a male nurse named Rhys walked in. Rhys smiled at him.

“How’s the patient?” Rhys asked. Going over to you.

Connor let out a small sigh. Looking at Rhys.

“Pretty much the same,” Connor replied.

“If it’s any consolation, I think you made the right choice putting her in an induced coma,”  Rhys spoke. Checking the wires that were connected to you.

“Let me guess Adam was complaining about it when he walked out?” Connor questioned. Making Rhys chuckle.

“Yep,” Rhys chuckled.

“Oh, Kyle is still in the waiting room, did you want me to inform him?” Rhys asked. Looking at Connor.

“No, it’s okay I will do it,” Connor responded. Making Rhys smile. Connor smiled at Rhys. Giving you one last longing glance. Before walking out of your room, and over to the waiting room.

Connor spotted Kyle. Making him let out a small sigh.

Connor smiled at Kyle as he made his way over to him.

“Kyle,” Connor greeted. Standing in front of Kyle.

“Is she okay? Is she awake?” Kyle asked frantically.

“She suffered a lot of brain trauma and I had to put her in an induced coma,” Connor replied.

Kyle looked down in defeat. Feeling like the whole world was closing around him.

“She’s in good hands,” Connor spoke. Giving Kyle a reassuring smile.

“Did you at least find out her name?” Kyle asked. Making Connor suck in a deep breath.

He knew who you were, but he just didn’t know if he should tell Kyle your name. The problem was Kyle was friends with Adam, who he hated, and who was a cop. Connor had a gut feeling your ex-boyfriend, who happened to be a cop did this to you.

“We don’t know, whoever hurt her removed her fingertips, and tried to make her unrecognizable,” Connor spoke. Making Kyle frown.

“You can see her if you want,” Connor spoke again. Seeing Kyle look deflated.

Kyle lifted his head. Eyes brightening with happiness. He got up.

“Thank you,” Kyle beamed. Connor gave Kyle a small smile.

Connor guided Kyle to your room. Opening the door for Kyle.

Kyle rushed in. Connor followed behind Kyle. Closing the door. Watching Kyle closely.

Kyle looked at you with a pained expression. Walking over to you. Taking in your appearance. It was all too overwhelming. Tears collected in his eyes.

He took a huge gulp before speaking.

“Don’t worry, my friend is a cop, and he will find out who hurt you,” Kyle promised you.

“Or side with her ex,” Connor thought to himself.

Kyle was about to sit down when his phone let out a ping. He quickly fished it out of his pocket. Looking at the phone screen. He had to go back to work. He looked at you then at the screen. Letting out a defeated sigh.

“Can I visit her again after my shift ends?” Kyle asked as he got up.

“Sure,” Connor replied. Smiling at Kyle. Kyle gave you one last final glance before walking out of the room reluctantly….

Adam parked his car next to Roddy’s car. Turning the car off and putting it in park. He put the hand brake up. Taking the car keys out of the ignition. Adam opened the door, stepping out of his car.

Roddy quickly walked up to him. Handing him some disposable gloves.

“Any evidence bagged yet?” Adam asked. As the two of them walked over to the burnt-down barn.

“No, everything is burnt,” Roddy spoke. Adam let out a grunt of annoyance.

He was about to speak, but the sound of a car engine coming towards them. Made him turn his attention towards the noise.

Adam saw Kyle get out of a taxi. Giving the taxi driver a couple of notes through the window.

Bobby quickly walked up to Kyle. Greeting Kyle.

“Hey man, how is she?” Bobby asked. Giving Kyle a big hug.

“In a coma,” Kyle responded. As Bobby pulled away.

“I’m sure she will pull through,” Bobby spoke. Putting his hand on Kyle’s shoulder.

Whatever Kyle was about to say was interrupted by the sound of someone talking.

“I found something,” Another cop spoke. Near the wooden fence.

Roddy, Adam, Bobby, and Kyle quickly rushed over.

The cop pointed at the fence. Adam smirked as he saw blood on the wooden fence. He felt confident it was the mystery woman that was lying in the hospital and that Mr. William didn’t hold the woman captive as Kyle claimed.

Adam turned to Kyle with a smug look. Making Kyle narrow his eyes slightly. Bobby and Roddy looked back and forth between Adam and Kyle.

“There's your evidence that Mr. William didn’t hold the woman hostage,” Adam spoke smugly. Making Kyle’s jaw clench slightly.

Adam turned his attention back to the cop.

“Bag it,” He spoke before walking off. Kyle glared at the back of Adam’s head.

It could be the blood of the woman he rescued or an injured animal, he thought to himself…

Chapter Text

 • ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••   

It’s been two weeks since they found a bloody and bruised woman in Mr. William's barn.

Adam exhausted all leads. The blood they found wasn’t human, it was animal blood.

Adam tapped his fingers impatiently on his desk. Looking at the results from the blood they found two weeks ago. He put the piece of paper down. Letting out a frustrated groan.

“How about we get a warrant or something so we can get her blood?” Roddy suggested. Looking up from the PC screen.

“I have a better idea, we wake her up, grill her till she breaks,” Adam suggested. Making Roddy look at him with concern.

“Are you sure?” Roddy asked. Voice laced with concern.

“Unless you want an innocent man wrongly accused, we have no other choice, plus I think it’s time for her to wake up, I’m sure she would remember now, she’s been in a coma for two weeks,”

“How do you know she will remain; they say she has had brain trauma,” Roddy spoke.

“Because it is our only option,” Adam grumbled. Getting up and grabbing his coat. Roddy let out a sigh. Getting up and following Adam…

__________________________________________

 Kyle smiled at the barista as she handed him a water bottle and a sandwich he ordered. He turned around, only to bump into a woman.

“Sorry,” Kyle apologized. Giving her a small smile. His smile dropped as he realized who it was. It was Mr. Williams, daughter.

“You should be, because of you everyone in this town thinks my father hurt that woman, that he held her hostage, that he tortured her,” She growled out. Tears collecting in her eyes. She looked like she hadn’t slept in weeks. Or if she, did it must have been a few hours. She had dark circles underneath her eyes.

“Well, what else was I supposed to think, she was injured,”  Kyle snapped.

“Are you just being petty because I broke up with you?” She growled out. Through clenched teeth.

“That has nothing to do with it,” Kyle snapped. Glaring at her.

“Well, I hope you are proud of yourself, my father literally had a heart attack,” She snapped. Spinning on her heel and walking away…

__________________________________________

 Adam walked into the hospital. Looking around the hospital in search of Connor. Adam walked over to the nurse's station. Smirking as he saw it was the nurse that always flirts with him. Roddy followed behind him.

“Where’s Doctor Rhodes?” Adam asked her.

“In surgery why?” She asked. Batting her eyelashes.

“No reason,” Adam smirked. Giving her a charming smile before turning around and walking to the unknown woman’s room.

Adam looked around before entering the room. Seeing if the coast was clear. Roddy followed behind him feeling slightly unsure if they should do this. He tried to talk Adam out of it on the way to the hospital, but Adam didn’t listen.

Adam took out a needle, with a liquid substance.

“Where did you get that from?” Roddy asked. Eyes widen in shock.

“A friend,” Adam responded. Walking over to you. He took the cap off the needle. Putting the needle into your cannula.

Adam smirked as he put the liquid substance into you. Roddy felt his heart rate quicken. Gulping as he felt like this was all a bad idea.

Your eyes opened wide. Looking around the room to see two male figures looking at you. You saw two figures standing there. Eyes widen in fear as you saw a police badge on their uniforms. Your mind quickly flashed to the nightmares you were having. The guy who beat you up had a badge. The sound of the machine monitor beeped loudly and rapidly. Roddy felt worried thinking it was the liquid substance that was affecting you. Maybe you were having an allergic reaction…

 • ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••   

 Adam got up in your face. Making you gulp hard.

“Do you remember what happened to you?” Adam demanded. Making you move your head to the side. Adam’s eyes sparkled dangerously. He grabbed your chin hard. Roughly pulling your head to face him. The sound of the machine beeped faster making Roddy panic.

“Dude, just leave her alone,” Roddy sighed. Grabbing Adam’s shoulder and trying to pull him away. But Adam fought against him. Shrugging him off.

You tried to reach out to the button. But Adam grabbed your hand tightly. Making you whimper. Tears gathered in your eyes. As your heart rate speed up the machine beeped frantically.

Was he going to hurt you like that other cop was doing in those dreams you had?

“Tell me,” Adam demanded.

“I don’t remember,” You weakly gasped out. voice trembling with fear.

“Adam,” Roddy warned. Feeling worried about your safety. Yes, they needed answers. But scaring you to answer wasn’t the right solution.

“What the hell do you think you are doing?” Connor shouted. Looking at Adam and Roddy with fury in his eyes, but mainly Adam.

“Just getting answers, I mean it’s been two weeks since she came here, I want to know who our mystery woman is, don’t you?” Adam smugly spoke. Making Connor’s blood boil. While Roddy just shook his head disapprovingly.

“Are you insane, she has had a traumatic brain injury, she needs rest,” Connor growled out. Taking a step closer to you. Adam let go of you. making your heart rate decrease. You cast your gaze down.

“She woke up on her own,” Adam spoke. Connor gave Adam a sarcastic smile. Not believing a word he just spoke. Roddy shook his head no.

“I’m sure she did. Get out,” Connor spat out. Making Adam smirk smugly.

“I’ll find answers, and if you get in the way again I won’t hesitate in charging you,” Adam threatened. Glaring at Connor. Connor glared back at him.

Adam broke eye contact smirking.

“Come on, Roddy, see you later sweetheart,” Adam spoke sweetly. Patting your hair. Making you flinch.

Adam smirked at Connor as Roddy and he walked out of the door.

A whimper caught Connor’s attention.

“Are you okay?” He asked. Eyes full of worry. He quickly checked on you.

You looked at him intensely. Studying his features. He was gorgeous. You felt your breath hitch as he leaned closer. Shining his torch in your eyes.

He was about to speak but you cut him. Something about him made you want to tell him the reoccurring dream you kept having while sleeping. Well, it was more like a nightmare. Like he would keep you safe. that you could trust him. Heck, you would tell him your darkest secrets if you could remember them.

“I think I know who hurt me… when I was asleep, I kept having these vivid images of this guy attacking me. He hurt me so cruelly. And I saw a police badge,” You confessed. Your voice was above a whisper.

Connor looked at you with a heartbroken expression. Making your forehead crease with confusion. Why was he looking at you like that?

He grabbed your hand. Sitting down on the bed. His eyes gathering with tears.

“I don’t want to freak you out too much, but…” Connor spoke. Taking a deep breath before he spoke again.

“I know you; I know who did this to you,” He confessed. Making your breath hitch. Your mouth opening in shock. Eyes locked onto his.

“What’s my name?” You barely gasped out but he heard you somehow.

“Y/n l/n,” He responded.

“I’ll tell you anything, whatever you want to know I will tell you,” Connor spoke, looking at you with concern in his eyes…

 • ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••   

You looked at Connor in shock. Your brain processing the words Connor spoke. Connor looked at you with a worried expression. While you looked down at the sheets.

You looked up at him. Parting your lips.

“Tell me more,” You gasped out. Heart beating faster.

Connor let out a sigh. Inching closer to you.

“You are from Chicago,” Connor started to say. Smiling slightly.

“You have two brothers, Will and Jay. Jay is actually your twin,” Connor told you.

“Twin? I’m a twin,” You gasped out in disbelief. Making Connor smile.

“Not identical though,” Connor chuckled. As a small smile graced your lips.

“You did have a boyfriend, but you dumped him, then got together with another man, which no one knows what he looks like, other than his name, which is Roman,” Connor spoke again.

“Oh, do you think he did this to me?” You asked. Heart plummeting as you waited for his response.

Connor let out a sigh. Casting his eyes down. his thumb absently caressing his thumb across the tattoo on your wrist. your eyes traveled down to where his thumb was. Sparks igniting in your body at his touch.

“ I think he did, I wouldn’t put it past him,” Connor finally spoke. Looking up at you. making your breath hitch.

“But the guy I saw in my dreams had a badge,” You gasped out.

“Yeah, your ex was a cop, wait you had dreams about what happened to you?” Connor spoke.

“Yeah,” You spoke quietly. Connor looked at you with concerned eyes.

“Your brother is a detective, didn’t like your ex-boyfriend, thought he was a corrupt cop,” Connor told you.

“Will or Jay?” You asked.

“Jay, Will is a doctor, and well you are a nurse, Will also hated your ex as well,” Connor replied. As you looked at him. Hanging on his every word.

You didn’t want to hear more about your abusive ex, so you changed the subject.

“What about us? How do we know each other?” You asked. This question seemed to throw Connor off guard. He looked at you with wide eyes. A shocked expression on his face. You raised your eyebrow at him.  Wanting to know why he had that reaction.

It made you want to know the answer even more. Obliviously something went down between the two of you. Since he got nervous under your gaze. He looked away, delaying his response.

“I didn’t ask how you are feeling?” Connor asked. Avoiding your question by asking a question of his own.

This made you want to know even more.

“I’m fine, but you didn’t answer my question,” You spoke.

Connor ignored the last word you spoke. Taking his stethoscope from around his neck. He put the earplugs in his ear. Grabbing hold of the bell. Bringing it towards your chest. You grabbed his wrist, stopping him. Connor’s breath hitched at the contact of your skin on his.

He took a deep breath before speaking. Avoiding eye contact.

“We were friends… best friends,” Connor spoke. You gave him a confused look at how he was reacting. And how long it took him to reply.

You opened your mouth to speak, but Connor beat you to it.

“It’s complicated, we are best friends, but we had a friend with benefits kind of relationship as well, then it went downhill, then I left,” Connor spoke. Still avoiding your gaze. He looked sad.

“Because of me?” You asked. Voice-breaking. This made Connor finally look at you.

“No,” He responded.

“It wasn’t your fault, I didn’t leave because of you,” Connor spoke again. Grabbing a hold of your hand. Both of you gazing into each other’s eyes.

Just as you were about to speak the door opened. Making Connor get up. He stood up. Looking professional, as the nurse made her way into your room.

She arched her eyebrow at Connor.

“Just checking on our mystery patient,” Connor spoke.

“Your up,” She spoke. Directing her gaze at you, then back at Connor when he spoke.

“No thanks to Cole,” Connor grumbled. The nurse gave a forced smile. You could tell it didn’t reach her eyes.

“Doctor Cooper wants you for a consultant on one of his cases,” She spoke. Giving Connor a fake smile. Connor looked annoyed. He gave her a fake smile too. Before looking at you. Giving you a genuine smile.  You could sense the tension between them.

“I’ll see you later,” He spoke. Giving you a sincere smile, before walking out of the room.

“So… what were Doctor Rhodes and you talking about?” She asked.

‘Not much, just asked if I could remember what my name was as well as if I could remember what happened to me?” You spoke. Lying to her. As she checked in on you.

“He seemed pretty close,” She spoke.

“He was just checking in on me,” You spoke. Making her give you a fake smile.

“Okay, I’ll check in on you later,” She responded. Giving you another fake smile, as she exited the room.

She quickly walked over to the nurse's station. Taking out her phone. Unlocking her phone. She quickly went into the messaging app. Pressing the conversation she had with Adam.

No budge. Though Connor and she seem pretty close She sent to him…

 Adam gripped his phone tighter as he reread the message over again. He let out a grunt of annoyance. He was about to reply when the door to his office opened. Mr. Williams Daughter storming in. Roddy trailing behind her. Adam gave her a forced smile. Adam placed his phone on his desk.

“How can I help you?” Adam asked.

“Of course you are just sitting there doing nothing, you should be grilling that woman,” She snapped. Fists clenched.

“The truth will come out, we are doing everything we can, ” Roddy reassured her. But she just turned around to face him. giving him a deadly glare.

“My dad isn’t a kidnapper or abuser,” She snapped. Storming out of the office.

Adam picked up his phone. Typing a message furiously.

Spy on them. Listen in on their conversations, report back to me.

Adam smirked as he sent the message. He would find out who that woman was…

 • ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••   

Kyle felt anxious as he walked into the hospital. Fidgeting with his fingers. He heard through the grapevine, well Adam, the woman he saved was awake. Kyle wanted to visit her, to see how she was.

He walked over to the nurse’s station. He smiled nervously at the nurse. Who happened to be the nurse Adam flirted with.

She gave him a fake smile, which didn’t ease his nerves.

“Let me guess, you are here to see the woman you saved,” She spoke. Giving him a teasing smile.

“Yeah, I heard she was awake,” Kyle spoke.

“You can go see her,” The nurse spoke Kyle gave her a small smile, before turning around and walking to your room.

The sound of the door creaking made you snap your head away from the TV screen to look at the person who entered your room. You hoped it was Dr. Rhodes. But it turned out to be a stranger. You gave him an anxious look as you took in his features. He had brown eyes, a red beard, or maybe it was auburn and brown hair.

Kyle took notice of you looking at him cautiously.

“I’m Kyle, I saved you from the burning barn,” He spoke gently.

“Oh, well, I would tell you my name, if I could remember it,” You lied. You did know your name, you just didn’t know who you could trust other than Doctor Rhodes, which he is yet to tell you his first name.

Kyle let out a chuckle. Grabbing the chair and bringing it to the side of your bed. He sat down. Grimacing at the discomfort. Making you arch an eyebrow.

“You look better than when I first saw you,” Kyle spoke softly.

“Mmm, I don’t feel it, my head is pounding, I look like I’ve been through hell,” You whined. Pouting at him. Kyle smiled.

“But you are alive, that’s the most important thing,” Kyle spoke.

“I suppose, but my head is killing me,” You whined.

“Do you want me to go get a nurse? Maybe they can give you something?” Kyle spoke in a worried tone.

“Nah, pretty sure she hates me, I’ll be fine,” You gasped out. Bringing your uninjured hand up to your forehead.

Kyle felt his heart hurt as he watched you wince in pain.

“Do you remember anything?” He asked. His tone was sweet and caring.

“Just running through bushes and trees, then seeing the barn,” You reply. Eyes widening as you realized you might have revealed too much. Maybe it was how he asked you. Maybe it was those brown eyes staring intently into your soul.

Before Kyle or you could utter a single word the door to the room opened.

“Hey, y/n we’ve…” Connor started to say but stopped when he saw Kyle sitting next to your bed. Jealousy spiked inside of him. His jaw slightly clenching. The reaction didn’t go unnoticed by you. Maybe Kyle but not you.

“Oh, I didn’t know you had visitors,” Connor spoke.

“I just heard she was up, and I wanted to check in on her,” Kyle nervously replied. It was cute. Connor gave Kyle a forced smile.

Kyle seemed nervous.

“Um, I’ll see you soon,” Kyle spoke. Looking at you with a nervous smile, as he got up. You gave him a small smile in return. Watching him walk out of the room.

Your gaze returned to Connor. Giving him a pointed look.

“You seem jealous,” You pointed out.

“I’m not, I’m just worried,” Connor spoke defensively.

“Mmmhm…” You responded. Letting out a gasp of pain as your head throbbed.

Connor rushed over to you. Panic evident on his face.

“Are you okay?” Connor asked.

“Other than feeling pain in my head and body, yeah, I’m peachy,” You grunted.

“Carson is supposed to be giving you pain meds, damn it,” Connor grumbled at the nurse’s failure.

You gave him a quizzical look. Who was Carson?

‘Who’s Carson?” You asked. Voice sounding harsher than it was meant to be.

“The nurse that comes and checks in on you,” Connor responded.

“Oh,” You mumbled.

“I was going to clear you, but…” Connor started to say but you cut him off.

“I’m fine, it’s just pain,” You cut Connor off.

“You have had a traumatic experience,” Connor explained.

“I’m fine,” You huffed out. You would cross your arms if you could. So instead, you just pouted like a toddler who didn’t get their way.

Connor was about to speak but you cut him off.

“Please, clear me, I can’t take the taste of hospital food anymore, I mean the ice cream is great, don’t get me wrong, it’s the only highlight, but I’m bored sitting here,” You whined. Making your headache even worse.

“Ouch, and here I thought I was great company,” Connor fake sighed.

“You are…It’s just this hospital is driving me insane,” You huffed out.

“You’ve only had hospital four times,” Connor chuckled. While you just intensified your gaze. Pouting at him.

“Okay, fine, I’ll run a few tests before I give you the all-clear,” Connor spoke.

“Can’t we skip the tests?” You begged. Giving him a puppy dog look.

“Tests or hospital food for another week,” Connor spoke sternly. Making you let out a whine.

“Fine,” You sighed.

“And you are staying with me when I discharge you,” Connor spoke. Making your heart skip a beat.

Neither Connor nor you noticing Carson outside the door. She took her phone out of her pocket. Unlocking it. She quickly went into the messaging app. Clicking on the messages she had with Adam.

She’s being discharged. Staying with Connor. Kyle visited her btw, maybe you can use him as a pawn to find more about her.

 • ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••   

After hours of CAT scans, MRI scans, CT scans, an echo, blood testes among other tests, among other tests, you were grateful that you didn’t have to take anymore. All you had to do was wait for the results.

Connor walked into the room with a huge smile on his face. Holding a bunch of clothes in his hands. you quirked an eyebrow.

“I got the results back, and you are in the clear, there were a few things that were a bit concerning but as long as you get psychotherapy to gain some of your memory back,” Connor spoke. As you smiled brightly at him. You sat up.

“Finally,” You beamed.

“I got a nurse to get you some clothes to change into, I got Rhys to buy some for you,” Connor spoke.

“Oh,” You spoke. Having no idea who Rhys was.

“He is one of the nurses who work here, and my friend,” Connor spoke. Connor placed the clothes on the bed. As you pushed the blanket back.

Connor’s hand rested on your lower back as you tried to get up. Connor assisted you.

He felt panic rise inside of him as you wobbled a bit. Your hand grabbed his arm for balance.

“Are you going to help me change?” You joked. Making Connor’s face turn red. He awkwardly scratching the back of his neck.

“Do you need help? Because I can get a nurse to help you,” Connor spoke.

“I’ll be fine,” You responded. Giving him a small smile.

Connor arched his eyebrow at you. Looking at where your hand was holding his arm for support.

You quickly took your hand away from his arm. Feeling slightly embarrassed.

“Alright, I will go get my stuff, then come back,” Connor spoke. Giving you one last longing glance, before walking out of your room.

You slowly took small steps towards the clothes. Slowly undoing the hospital gown. You cautiously put the clothes on that Connor gave you.

Just as you put the sweater on there was a knock at the door. Making you turn around.

“Come in,” You called out. Connor walked into the room. An amused smile gracing his lips as he held onto the strap. Keeping it from slipping. He was dressed in dark jeans, a top, and a black leather jacket. You quickly adverted your eyes back to his.

“Don’t laugh, It’s not my fault I have a sling,” You spoke in a pouty tone. Pouting at him. Connor let out a laugh. Walking closer to you.

“I’m not, I just think you look adorable, I discharged you while I was waiting for you to get changed,” Connor spoke.

“What would I do without you,” You jokingly spoke.

Not get beaten up by your toxic abusive ex-boyfriend, Connor thought to himself. He wanted to say that, but instead, he said something else.

“You ready to go?” Connor asked. Making you nod enthusiastically.  He quickly walked to the door opening it for you.

You quickly walked towards him.

“Thank you,”  You spoke. As you walked past him and out the door. Connor followed behind you. Catching up with you. you followed him out of the hospital and towards a car park. Which you assumed it must have been staff parking.

Connor took out his car keys. Stopping at his car.  He quickly unlocked the car.

“Fancy car,” You commented on his car. Connor let out a chuckle. 

“Well, it’s nowhere near as cool as what your car is,” Connor spoke.

“Shame I can’t remember it,” You sighed. Pouting at him.

“It was a Jeep Wrangler, the newer version,” He responded. Opening the car door for you.

“And he is a gentleman too,” You praised him. Making his cheeks blush. You may not remember the history he and you shared, but he did.

You quickly got in. Connor shut the door. Rushing over to the driver's side. Getting in and putting his bag in the back. Connor put the keys in the ignition. Turning the car on. Putting his seat belt on. Connor put the handbrake down, then put the car into reverse. Backing out of the car park. He put the car into gear then speed off.

Connor glanced at you now and then seeing you take in the surroundings. Connor smiled slightly. His heart hurting at what you have been through. He wishes he stayed in Chicago, he wished you at least called him and told him what your ex did to you.

Connor drove into a driveway of an apartment complex. Stopping in front of a garage.

“You live in here,” You gasped out. Mouth a gap.

“Yep,” Connor chuckled. Grabbing a remote from the center console. He pressed a button making the garage door roll up. Connor drove in. Pressing the closed button on the remote button. The roller door closed.

Connor chuckled at your reaction. Finding a parking spot. He quickly parked in the spot. Putting the car into park. He pulled the handbrake up. Turning the car off. Connor turned his body. Reaching in the back to grab his bag. While you exited the car. Connor took the keys out of the ignition. Getting out of the car. He quickly got out. locking the car.

“Come on, I will make you a nice dinner,” Connor spoke softly. You quickly followed Connor. Stopping behind him as he pressed the elevator button. The elevator chimed, as the doors opened.

Both of you walking in. Connor pressed the button to the top floor.

“So, is anyone living with you like a significant other?” You questioned.

Connor shook his head no.

“I haven’t been in the dating scene or been with anyone since Chicago,” Connor spoke awkwardly. The air in the elevator getting thicker.

“Really,  because your hot and a doctor, plus you seem nice, least with me,” You spoke. Connor gave you a small smile.

The elevator dinged as it reached the top floor. Connor quickly exited the elevator. You quickly followed him. walking down the hallway in silence.

You felt slightly worried you may have stepped over a line.

“I’m sorry about that, I just…” You apologized only for Connor to cut you off. As he stopped in front of a door at the end of the hallway. Taking out keys. He put them into the keyhole. Turning it.

“It’s okay,” Connor spoke. As he grabbed the doorknob, twisting the doorknob. Opening the door.

“I…Wow,” You gasped out as you saw the city lights out of the window.

“So pretty,” You gawked out. Rushing over to the window. Connor let out an amused chuckle. Shutting the door and locking it.

You looked around the apartment in amazement. Connor let out a laugh.

“I’ll show you the room you will be staying in, it has a bathroom,” Connor spoke, as he walked over to a room. Opening a door.

“A bathroom, wow,” You beamed. Rushing over to the room.

Connor smiled at your reaction. He quickly looked away.

“Why don’t you have a shower, I still have clothes of yours that you can change into,” Connor spoke.

“You kept my clothes?” You asked. Arching an eyebrow.

“Yeah, from when you left them at my old place,” Connor mumbled. Cheeks flushing a light shade of pink. Why was he embarrassed he knew you.

“Thank you,” You spoke softly. Smiling at him softly.

“I’m going to make us dinner, clean towels are in the cupboard, Oh, and your clothes are in the tallboy,” He spoke, quickly turning around and walking out the room. Your heart beating wildly.

You couldn’t remember what you had with him, or any previous relationship, but for some reason Connor made you feel something. You felt a spark there.

“He is a doctor and can cook, damn, I missed the mark on that one,” You spoke in a dreamy tone.

You let out a heavy sigh walking into the bathroom. Closing the door. Stripping your clothes off.

Your eyes widen as you realized you have a sling on you. A curse slipped from your lips

“Ah, Connor I have a sling, could you get me a plastic bag,” You yelled out. Waiting for him to respond. But he didn’t.

You looked around the bathroom. Noticing a bathtub.

“I suppose having a bath will do,” You huffed out. struggling to take the rest of your clothes up. But eventually, you got there.

You walked over to the bathtub. Turning both taps on. Checking the temperature. Letting out a satisfied hum when it was the right temperature You put the plugin. Grabbing the shower gel. You squirted a bit in the water. Putting the bottle of shower gel down. You waited for the water to get a certain height; you turned the taps off. Carefully getting into the bathtub…

Connor tried to distract himself with making Spaghetti Carbonara, chopping up mushrooms, and bacon into little bits but failed miserably. You were invading his thoughts. It was killing him how he couldn’t just kiss you, but you didn’t have your memories of what he and you shared, and he didn’t want to scare you, let alone start something knowing you still had a boyfriend.

The spaghetti was already strained. All he had to do was put the sauce in. He poured the sauce into the pot. Putting the mushrooms into the sauce as well as the bacon.

Connor stirred the carbonara sauce around in the pot. Warming the sauce up. His mind wandering back to a memory he had with you.

A giggle escaped your lips as Connor’s beard scratched your neck, as he trailed kisses down your neck.

“We should just call in sick and do this all day,” You suggested. Making Connor look up at you tilting his head. He raised one of his eyebrows. Smirking at you.

“That’s a good idea,” Connor smirked. Pressing his lips against yours. The kiss turning feverish…

“I’m finished,” You spoke, in a sing-song voice. Making Connor jump. He quickly composed himself.

“Oh, smells nice,” You commented.

“Um…” Connor stuttered. He quickly checked if the sauce was warm. Thankful that it was.

“You okay?” You asked. Curious and worried.

“Yeah, you surprised me,” He spoke. Pouring the sauce into the pot that was filled with spaghetti. Connor quickly stirred the sauce around in the pot. Mixing the Carbonaro sauce with the spaghetti.

“Dinners ready,” Connor announced. Walking over to a cupboard. He opened it up, grabbing out two bowls. Connor went over to a draw. Pulling it open. He grabbed two forks. Connor turned around. Walking back to you. he quickly picked the spoon he was using. Putting the food into the bowl, before handing it to you.

“Thank you,” You spoke softly. walking over to the table. Connor joined you a second later.

“So, you said I have brothers what do they look like?” You asked. Breaking the silence.

“Well,” Connor spoke. Kind of getting caught off guard. He put his fork down, grabbing his phone.

Connor unlocked his phone, going into the photo app. He quickly pressed the see all option, scrolling until he found the album titled y/n with a red heart emoji. He quickly pressed that album. Scrolling until he found the picture of Jay, Will and you. While you ate more food.

“You were closer with Jay,” Connor spoke. Showing you the picture. You leaned in closer taking in the features of your brothers. One had brown hair and blue eyes while the other one had red hair with brown eyes.

“Because we were twins?” You asked.

“Probably, he and you had a weird co-dependent type of relationship, which surprises me, that he didn’t know who your mystery boyfriend Roman was,” Connor spoke. Making your eyes squint slightly. Trying to remember what Roman looked like, as well as memories with your brothers but nothing came up. You just made yourself get a headache.

“That’s Jay…” Connor spoke, pointing to the guy with brown hair and blue eyes.

“My twin,” You mumbled. But Connor heard you.

“Yep… And that’s Will,” Connor spoke again. Pointing to the guy with the red hair and brown eyes.

Connor noticed you grimace a bit. Your hand coming up to your forehead. Rubbing it.

“You okay?” Connor asked.

“Yeah, just tried to remember who they were, plus Roman,” You spoke. Rubbing your forehead.

“Leave that to psychotherapy,” Connor spoke. Giving you a small smile. Which you returned it by also giving him a slight smile.

The both of you ate in silence again. After dinner, Connor grabbed the plates, cutlery and pots, putting them in the dishwasher. He went over to the cupboard again. Grabbing a glass. Walking over to the sink. He turned the tap on. Pouring some water into the glass. He walked over to you handing you the glass of water.

“Thanks,” You mumbled. As he walked back to the kitchen island, grabbing a pack of tablets. He opened the box up. Popping two tablets into the palm of his hand, then spinning around. He walked back to you. Handing you the tablets.

“Oh, I’m fine,” You spoke.

“It’s your pain meds,” He spoke.

“Oh,” You spoke. Taking them off of him. you put them in your mouth. Taking a huge gulp of water. As you swallowed them. Grimacing at the aftertaste.

Connor let out a small chuckle.

“You’ve never been good with taking medicine or tablets,” Connor chuckled. His blue eyes staring intensely into your eyes. The intensity causes your lower belly to stir. Breath hitching. You may not remember whatever happened between him and you, but your body sure does.

“So, are you going to tell me more about your scandalous friendship?” You asked. Taking Connor off guard. He turned pale. Beads of sweat forming on his hairline. He scratched the back of his nervously.

“Do you want to watch a movie?” He asked changing the subject.

“Let’s watch a movie,” He spoke. Rushing over to the joint living room. He turned the TV on. Going into Netflix. He quickly picked a movie.

“Okay…” You responded. Getting up and walking over to him cautiously. Sitting down on the same couch he was sitting in. wondering if you may have asked a touchy subject by he reacted. Maybe he just didn’t want to talk about it, maybe it hurt him to bring up the past. But the more you thought about the more you wanted to know more about what happened between him and you.

So you decided to try something. Connor didn’t notice you move closer to him. till he felt your body heat.

Connor turned to look at you. Your hands cupped his jawline. Eyes looking at his intensely. Closing the distance between him and you. Connor was hypnotized. Maybe it was because it has been too long since he felt his lips against yours. But he let you kiss him.

Lips moving together in perfect sync. Both of you feeling the spark. Warmth feeling the both of you. butterflies

Connor quickly realized what you were doing. What he was doing too. He pulled away. A look of pain came across his features. Your face dropped into a look of sadness.

“I can’t go down that road not when you are with another man, and not when you can’t remember the history between us,” Connor quaked out. tears pooling in his eyes.

“How am I supposed to remember someone I have no recognition of, let alone a relationship? I feel something with you it seems familiar,” You gasped out. Tears gathering in your eyes. It broke his heart to see you cry. But he needed you to remember him. it wasn’t fair on him nor you.

“I can’t,” He gasped out. turning around and feeling to a room. He shut the door. Sliding down it. While you sat on the couch. Falling back on the cushions. Bringing your knees up to your chest, and hugging them for reassurance….

  • ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••   

You let out a heavy sigh as you heard the front door of his apartment close softly.

Carefully pulling the blanket and sheet off your body. Getting up. You walked to the bathroom. Stripping your clothes off. Turning the bathroom taps on. Putting the plug in. filling the bathtub up with warm water, as well as putting shower gel in the water.

You grabbed a washcloth. Stepping inside the water. Cleaning yourself off. Once you finished cleaning yourself, you got out. Pulling the plug out. The water going down the drain. You wrapped the towel around you. Drying yourself off. Then wrapped the towel around you again. You quickly went over to the basin. Brushing your teeth, then cleaning your tongue.

Once you finished cleaning your teeth, you walked out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. Walking over to the tallboy. Opening the draw, that seemed to have your clothes. It hurt your heart that he kept your clothes, yet he doesn’t want to kiss you. You grabbed a pair of panties. Dropping the towel. You put them on with great difficulty. As well as the rest of the clothes. The jeans were the worst.

You let out a sigh of relief. Walking out of the guest bedroom. You saw a note on the kitchen island counter. Walking over to the counter. Reading the words on the note.  Your psychotherapy appointment is tomorrow at 11 am.

You let out a sigh, dropping the piece of paper. He could have just told you that in person and not left it on a note. You needed air. But you didn’t have the keys to the place. You thought about it for a second before deciding to leave. It was the last unit on the top floor, and you could just wait by the door anyways.

You left his apartment. Closing the door. Walking towards the elevator. You pressed a button. Making the elevator make a noise as it went up to the top floor. Doors opening. You quickly rushed into the elevator. You pressed the lobby button. The doors slide closed. The elevator descended, till it reached the lobby. Making a chiming sound. The doors sliding open. You quickly exited. Sidestepping a woman, as she got into the elevator. You felt a little self-conscious as some people in the lobby stared at you. You felt a little relieved as you exited the apartment complex. You looked back at the building to see a name, but it had no name.

“Great,” You muttered to yourself. You hoped you didn’t get lost.

A cool hitting your face. You slowly walked down the sidewalk. Taking in the buildings and stores.

You weren’t really watching where you were going. Running into a woman and a stand of flowers. The flowers cluttering to the floor. The woman cursed.

You got up. Helping her out. The best you could.

“I’m sorry,” You apologized profusely. The woman took a good look at you before letting out an annoyed huff. Making you grumble.

“Course it’s you. Haven’t you done enough?” She snapped. You looked at her confused. Feeling slightly hurt by her words.

You were about to speak when you heard a familiar voice.

“Seriously, Norah, you don’t have to be a bitch, it’s not like she purposely set out to wreck your flowers,” Kyle snapped. Making Norah look at him. Clenching her jaw. Eyes narrowing into slits. You could tell something happened between the two of them.

“Of course, you would defend her, my father isn’t an abuser, he didn’t do this to her,” She growled out. Storming into the flower shop.

“She hates me,” You sighed. Kyle moved to stand in front of you.

“Don’t worry about her, do you want to go get coffee?” Kyle asked. Rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

“On a date?” You asked. Arching an eyebrow. This simple gesture made Kyle’s heart race,

“Just as a get-to-know basis?” Kyle responded. Making you give him a small smile.

“Aren’t you working?” You asked.

“My shift isn’t until later on,” He spoke. Making you smile.

“Okay,” You agreed. Kyle flashed you a smile.

Both of you walked towards a small coffee shop. Taking a seat on one of the outdoor chairs.

“Say if it was a date would you say yes?” Kyle asked. Making you look at him in surprise.

“Well….I mean….I could be in a relationship or married,” You gasped out.

Kyle looked at your left hand. Seeing no ring occupied it.

“I don’t see a ring on your finger,” He replied cheekily. Making you let out a tiny chuckle.

“True… could have slipped off,” You spoke. Making Kyle frown. Before he smiled again. He was about to speak when a waitress came up to the table. Handing Kyle and you a menu each. Kyle and you smiled at her.

“Thank you,” Kyle and you both spoke at the same time.

Both of you looked at the menu, then ordered. The waitress wrote down Kyle’s order as well as yours. Taking the menus from Kyle and you. Telling the two of you that the coffees should be out soon. Then left to go inside the coffee shop

“So… what’s up WITH Norah and you? I mean I get she hates me because of that whole thing with her father, but I feel like there was something more, I felt tension?” You asked. Kyle let out a heavy sigh.

‘She is my ex, long story short, it was a horrible relationship,” Kyle explained. You gave him a sympathetic smile.

“I’m sorry,” You spoke.

“It’s not your fault, we were young and stupid,” Kyle sighed.

The waitress came back with two cups of coffee. Placing them down on the table in front of Kyle and you.

Kyle and you thanked her. Taking a sip of coffee.

“Y/n,” Connor gasped out frantically. Making you turn around. You gave him a slight smile. He looked frantic. Eyes full of worry. Hair was disheveled.

“I’ve been looking for you,” Connor gasped out. While Kyle raised his eyebrow. What has Connor your keeper?

Connor felt intense amounts of jealousy when he saw Kyle and you sipping coffee.

He knew he had no right to get jealous since he rejected your advances last night. But it was only because he wanted you to remember him. Remember what the two of you shared before he goes down that road again or tries something.

You quickly finished your coffee. Giving Kyle an apologetic smile. You got up.

“I’ll see you around,” You spoke. Giving him a soft smile. You turned around. Walking over to Connor.

Connor and you walked away. Leaving jealousy to boil in Kyle’s veins. He felt so crushed as he watched you walk off with Connor….

 • ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••  

Adam bought the tip of the beer bottle up to his lips. Wrapping his lips around the tip. Tipping of the bottle up. He chugged on the beer. Giving Roddy a nod, as he sat down on the couch next to him

“Well, today was exhausting,” Roddy sighed. Taking a sip of the beer.

“Yeah, still haven’t made progress with that case,” Adam grumbled.

Roddy grabbed Adam’s knee in a comforting gesture.

“We will find out who she is,” Roddy reassured Adam.

“Hopefully soon,” Adam grumbled. Taking another sip.

Roddy and Adam’s attention turned to the door, as Bobby and Kyle came through the door.

“How was work?” Roddy asked as they dumped the duffle bags they took to work near the hallway

“Eventful,” Kyle sighed.

“You’d think people would learn to turn the heater off by now,” Bobby sighed. As he sat down on one of the chairs. While Kyle walked towards the kitchen to grab beers for him and Bobby.

Kyle came back into the living room. Handing Bobby a beer. Sitting down on the couch. He looking dejected. Kyle twisted the cap off the beer bottle. Adam took notice of his friend's mood.

“Why do you look so down?” Adam asked.

“That woman we found in that barn fire on Mr. Williams farm, I had a coffee date with her, but then Connor came, and swooped her away. She must be staying with him, it’s not like I stand a chance against him,” Kyle huffed out. Feeling slightly better he got that off his chest,

Adam had to stop himself from smiling as he thought of an idea. He could finally find out the identity of that woman.

“You should ask her out again, woo her until she falls for you,” Adam encouraged. Kyle furrowed his eyebrows.

“I suppose,” Kyle sighed. Still not convinced. For one he didn’t have your number. He knew where Connor lived. But he didn’t want to seem desperate.

“Come on man, you’re a catch, don’t put yourself down,” Bobby reassured Kyle.

“I’m sure she sees nothing in Connor, isn’t he, her doctor? Bit unprofessional if he is still her doctor,” Roddy spoke.

“I don’t know they seemed pretty close,” Kyle sighed. Taking a sip.

“Firefighters are way better than doctors,” Adam stated. Arching an eyebrow. Kyle rolled his eyes.

“Look dude, if you like her go for it, you haven’t dated anyone since Norah, I want you to be happy, you deserve to be happy,” Adam sighed.

Kyle let out a sigh. Maybe he should ask you out again, try to get out of the friendzone.

“I’ll see if she is free on the weekend. I’m sure she has some sort of therapy, considering what she’s been through,” Kyle spoke.

“That’s my boy,” Adam boasted. As all four of them took sips of their beers.

Adam couldn’t wait to find out the information Kyle would feed him about this unidentified woman….

 • ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••  

Jay glared at Austin as Austin took the stand. He had a suspicious feeling Austin knew more than he was letting on. He had a feeling that Austin had something to do with his sister's disappearance, possibly murder. He hoped this inquest unravelled Austin’s lies.

Jay clenched his jaw as Austin started to answer the question. Will spared a glance at his brother seeing Jay fuming.

“I love her, I just wish Roman would tell us where he put her body,” Austin responded to a question Jay wasn’t listening to. Jay had enough. He stood up in a fit of rage.

“We all that’s a lie, I wouldn’t be surprised if you were the one that killed her, you have abused her before. Which is why I think you kidnapped her and murdered her, then pinned it on some mafia boss she was dating,” Jay snapped. Making everyone in the courtroom turned to look at Jay.

“Mr. Halstead, sit down,” The judge spoke. Making Jay let out a grumble.

“No, he is the reason why my sister is missing. Possibly dead, if he claims he loved her so much, then why did he put bruises on her body. Laid his grimy hands on her. He abused her,” Jay snapped.

“Mr. Halstead,” The judge warned him.

“I did hurt her but that was my PTSD, I felt so bad after I hurt her. You should know that since you were in the military,” Austin spoke. Looking sad. Jay knew it was fake.

“Don’t use that as an excuse,” Jay shouted. Fury in his eyes.

The judge ordered the security guards to escort Jay out.

“I’m going to prove it was you, your lies will unravel, and the truth will come out,” Jay shouted as the guards escorted him out of the room.

Jay walked back to his truck. Fishing the keys out of his pockets. Jay unlocked the truck. Opening the door, and getting in. Putting the key in the ignition.

He wished he could have done more. His mind flashed back to when he last had an encounter with you before you disappeared.

“Y/n, open up,” Jay demanded. Banging on the door. You squeezed your eyes shut. Praying he would go away. You didn’t want him to see you with a black eye and busted lip.

Unfortunately for you, Jay didn’t go away. He pulled out the spare key you gave him. Putting it into the lock and unlocking the door. You cursed under your breath. Taking a step back from the door, as he opened it.

Jay’s eyes landed on you. He looked at you with a worried expression

“What happened? Who did this to you?” Jay asked. Looking at you with concerned eyes.

“Was it that new boyfriend of yours, because I swear if he turns out to be another Austin,” Jay grumbled. Concern turning into fury.

“No, it wasn’t Roman,” You sighed. Looking away from Jay. Glancing at the floor instead of Jay.

“It was Austin wasn’t,” Jay assumed.

“Course it was,” Jay grumbled.

“Jay, please, I’m handling it, he must have heard I was dating and he got jealous,” You sighed out. Giving him a pleading look.

“You are not safe from him y/n, let me handle this,” Jay spoke.

“I’m dealing with it,” You sighed.

“How are you dealing with it?” Jay snapped. Making you flinch. His eyes softened. His hands gently resting on your shoulder. Eyes looking into yours.

“I’m just worried one day you are going to end up in a body bag,” Jay sighed. You gave him a small smile.

“I’m going to get through this Jay,” You spoke softly voice cracking.

Jay went back to reality. He wished he did something that day. But he didn’t. But he was going to do something now. He was going to prove Austin killed you.

Jay turned the key in the ignition. Starting the truck. He quickly put his seatbelt on. Putting the handbrake down. then putting the transmission into gear. Jay pressed his foot on the accelerator leaving the courthouse to go to the 21st district.

Once he got there. He parked his truck. Storming into the 21st district. Not saying hello to Trudy as he walked past the front desk. He ran up the stairs. Punching the code word in. jay rushed up the stairs. Going into the bullpen. Hailey, Kevin, Adam, and Kim looked at Jay as he rushed into Hank's office. They all shared glances at each other. Feeling worried for their colleague and friend. Jay’s been on edge ever since your disappearance.

“I need your help, I’m hundred percent certain, that Austin Smith, murdered my twin sister, I saw her the night she disappeared he hurt her, she had a black eye and a busted lip,” Jay spoke.

Hank let out a grunt. Looking at Jay. He could tell this was wearing Jay down. he also had a feeling Austin wasn’t being truthful.

“I believe you, but if we are going to do this, we have to make sure we get hard evidence, bug his phones, keep this operation hush-hush, he is also a cop,” Hank spoke. Making Jay feel slightly better.

“We’re going to get this bastard, he is going to pay for what he did to my sister,” Jay spoke. Hank got up. Gesturing for Jay to follow him. Jay followed him.

“Alright, for now on we have one case and one case only, do not tell anyone else about the details of this case, you will not utter a single word about this case other than to the people in this team,” Hank spoke.

Hank looked at Jay. Jay nodded. Going to the whiteboard and writing y/n Halstead.

“Y/n Halstead, has been missing for a month, presumed dead, Austin blames Roman Reigns a mob boss in Chicago, for the disappearance of Y/n Halstead, Jay last saw her on the night she disappeared, a black eye and a busted lip, now we can assume Roman did it, but Austin has a history of hurting y/n, maybe he took it to far,” Hank spoke.

“We are going to bug his place, all his devices, till he confesses, gear up,” Hank spoke again. Walking out of the bullpen.

The rest of the team followed Hank. Getting ready to plant a bug in Austin Smith's house. The air was tense…

Hailey and Kim rode with Jay, while Adam and Kevin rode together and Hank drove alone.

“We will find her, Jay,” Hailey reassured Jay. Giving him a reassuring look. Jay tightened his grip on the steering wheel. Pressing his foot on the gas more.

“I just want her back,” Jay mumbled.

Kim and Hailey shared a look.

“How did the inquest go?” Kim asked.

“Horrible, he’s trying to play the victim,” Jay grumbled. Feeling slightly better as they all reached Austin’s house. He parked the truck.

Hailey was about to open her mouth when Jay got out of the car.

“He just wants to find her,” Kim sighed. As they both got out.

All of them slowly and tacitly walked to Austin’s house. Hailey, Adam, and Jay going behind the house, while Kim, Kevin, and Hank were out the front. Checking to see if Austin was home. When they found out he wasn’t. Adam picked the lock. Letting out a laugh of victory. Hailey, Jay, and Adam walked into the house, checking the area. Adam quickly went to the front. Opening the front door. Letting Kevin, Hank, and Kim in.

“Let's get in and get out,” Hank commanded. All of them nodded. Going off and placing bugs discreetly.

Once they finished placing the bug they all exited the house, Jay, Hailey, and Kevin going into the surveillance van while Kim, Adam, and Hank got into the vehicles. All they had to do was wait till Austin exposed himself…

 • ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ •• 

 You stared at the painting that was hanging in the psychotherapy waiting room. Waiting for your appointment. Technically it was CBT- Cognitive behavioral therapy, at least that’s what Connor told you last night. You were surprised he told you that. He has been acting weird and distant ever since you kissed him.

A woman who looked like she was in her late forties came out of the room. Then another middle-aged woman came out of the room as well. She gave you a warm welcoming smile.

“Come in, my name is Aurella,” She spoke.

You quickly got up. Walking into the room and sitting on the chair. Aurella shut the door. Walking over to the chair in front of you. She sat down.

“So, you’ve been through a lot, and since you suffered a brain injury and a head trauma. Your brain had repressed your memory. I’m here to help you regain some of those memories, like your name, life before coming here, and only if you want to what happened to you that lead you to have such this massive trauma,”  She spoke in a comforting voice. You nodded your head. Giving her a small smile.

“First we are going to start small, we are going to start with your name,” She spoke.

“Lay down, and close your eyes,” She told you. You did as she told you to do.

“Now relax,” She spoke again. You heard paper moving.

“I want you to picture something that makes you feel calm,” She spoke. Looking at your body language.

You tried to relax, but your vision just showed black.

“Some people picture the beach or lying in a field of flowers looking up at the sky,” Aurella spoke.

Your vision slowly picturing the field of flowers. Strolling through the field of flowers, you hear someone call out your name.

“What name do you hear?” She asked.

Your mind pictured you wandering in a field of flowers. A voice saying y/n. you turned around to see a guy with an evil smirk. Your heart racing. You looked down to see blood. You could smell the metallic smell of blood.

Your eyes shot open. Breathing heavily.

“Are you okay?” Aurella asked you. Looking at you with a concerned look.

“Y/n, that’s what I heard,” You told her. Leaving out the part of the guy you saw and the blood.

“Okay,” She spoke. Writing notes down in the book she was holding. She looked back up at you. Giving you a warm smile. As she noticed you looked uncomfortable.

“I’ll see you next week,” She spoke. Standing up.

“It was lovely meeting you,” Aurella spoke. As you got up. She assisted you to the door. Opening the door for you.

“You two,” You responded.

“Take care,” She spoke. As you walked out the door. Giving her a small smile. You walked over to the receptionist. She looked up.

“I have you booked for the same time and day next week. No need to pay Connor, I mean Dr. Rhodes paid for it,” She spoke.

“Thanks,” You spoke. You turned around to walk out of the room, as well as the hospital. Walking through the town.

You saw the flower shop. Your eyes darted around, as you thought whether to talk to Norah. You decided to talk. After that image, you saw you had to tell her. Maybe she would hate you less.

You took a deep breath. Walking over to the flower shop. As you entered the flower shop. The door chimed. Anxiety bubbled up inside of you.

Norah looked up. Her warm welcoming smile disappeared as she realized it was you. She looked angry.

“Norah…” You started to say. But she cut you off.

“How do you know my name?” She snapped out. Your heart quickened.

‘From yesterday,” You gulped out.

“Oh, right, why are you here? What do you want?” She snapped out. Fury in her eyes.

“I’m sorry, for what you are going through, people accusing your father of hurting me, I know he didn’t do it,” You spoke in a soft voice.

“Then tell the cops,” She growled out.

“It’s complicated,” You sighed. She let out an annoyed huff.

Neither Norah nor you noticing someone was listening. Hiding behind the back room. That person happened to be Jey Uso.

Jey’s eyes widened in shock. Mouth a gap. You were alive. He felt a small bit of relief. He had to tell Roman.

‘You know what you can do, go away, everything was fine till you showed up,” Norah snapped.

“I’m sorry,” You gasped out. Feeling tears prick your eyes.

“Why don’t you do everyone in this town a favor and disappear again, this time show up in a town not covered in blood,” She snapped. Storming off.

You let out a heavy sigh. Turning around and walking out the door.

Feeling deflated. You walked down the streets. looking down at your feet.

“Hey,” You heard a familiar voice call out to you. You looked up to see Kyle coming towards you.

“Hey Kyle,” You greeted him.

“How are you doing?” Kyle asked.

“Alright, how about you?” You replied.

“Same, I was wondering if you wanted to hang out again, on Saturday, have some coffee and lunch, at the same coffee shop, only if you want to,” Kyle suggested in a nervous tone.

“Sure,” You replied. Making Kyle smile brightly. You smiled at him.

He took out a piece of paper. Handing it to you. You arched an eyebrow. Seeing numbers on it.

“It’s my phone number,” He spoke.

“Oh, thank you, I don’t have a phone, but I will definitely see you on Saturday, what time?” You asked.

“A bit after eleven,” Kyle responded.

Another voice called out Kyle’s name. Making Kyle turn his attention towards the person who called his name.

Kyle looked back at you. Giving you a warm smile.

“I have to go, I’ll see you on Saturday, take care,” Kyle spoke. Giving you a warm smile.

He took off running towards his friend and co-worker Bobby. Leaving you to stare at the piece of paper that had his phone number on it…

• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

Jey was beyond thrilled his shift at the flower shop was over. He was staying in a cabin with Roman at Norah Williams farm. She told him she needed help at the flower shop. So, he helped her, mainly to get on her good books.

He listened for hours on days while she ranted about this unidentified woman who ended up in her barn that burnt down. Jey thought it was interesting that there was an unidentified woman in the town. Maybe it was y/n since they didn’t find her body. Roman thought Austin killed her given he was the one that saved her from Austin. But Jey believed you were still alive, and he was right.

Jey stopped the car at the cabin Roman and he was staying in. putting the handbrake up. Putting the car in park, he turned the car off. Pulling out the keys. He quickly got out. Rushing out of the car. Slamming the door. He quickly ran to the cabin. Opening the door and slamming it.

Roman looked up from the TV giving Jey an annoyed look.

“How was the flower shop?” Roman asked.

“Interesting,” Jey responded. Walking towards Roman. Till he was standing in front of him.

‘I don’t think anything about a flower shop would be interesting unless you met a woman, who is she? You know we can’t stay long here,” Roman spoke.

“I found her,” Jey spoke. Eyes gleaming. Finally feeling happy he got that off his chest. Unfortunately, Roman thought he meant something different.

Roman rolled his eyes. Letting out a drawn-out sigh.

“Jey, this was a temporary thing, we can’t stay here, break up with her,” Roman demanded.

“I don’t think you understand, I found her,” Jey spoke again. Looking desperately at Roman.

“Well, I’m sure you will find another woman at the next town,” Roman grumbled.

“I found y/n,” Jey slightly shouted. Making Roman’s eyes widened. Mouth a gap.

He stood up.

“But he…” Roman gasped out in shock.

“She’s alive, though I think she was amnesia,” Jey spoke.

“Do you know what this means,” Roman spoke.

“Your innocent,” Jay responded. Roman grabbed Jey’s shoulders. Looking into his eyes.

“We can kidnap her and get out of this town,” Roman spoke. Making Jey look at Roman with confusion.

“But she doesn’t remember anything let alone her name,” Jey spoke.

“Doesn’t matter, I can’t lose her again,” Roman gasped out. Jey gulped before speaking.

“Then when do we do it?” Jey asked.

“We keep tabs on her, and when she is alone, we take her,” Roman spoke. Smiling at Jey. Bringing his hand up to Jey’s face and patting it out…

 • ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

Carson trailed behind Connor at a safe distance. Making sure she didn't get caught. She saw him go into a room.

She quickly pressed her ear to the door. Listening in on the quiet talking.

"Connor, I can't tell you how she went?' Aurella sighed.

"Please," Connor begged. Aurella let out a sigh.

"Her name is y/n, but I have a feeling she saw something else, just by how she woke up in a fright, I didn't persist because that wouldn't help her, given her current situation," Aurella spoke. Connor felt defeated you didn't remember him yet.

Carson smiled to herself as she found out this unidentified woman's name. She sneaked away, going into a supply closet. Taking out her phone. Unlocking the phone. She went into the messaging app. Going into the convo she had with Adam.

Her name is Y/n, didn't get the last name, but I hope that helps. She typed, then pressed sent.

A few minutes later her phone vibrated. She smiled as she saw his reply.

Thank you, it helps a lot. Adam responded.

She quickly replied with a kiss emoji before locking her phone. Putting it back in her pocket. She composed herself before walking out of the supply closet, getting back to work...

❛ ━━━━━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━━━━━ ❜

Adam smirked as he reread the text Carson sent him. He finally had her name.

He looked at the screen of the PC.

"I got a lead, found out her name," Adam spoke, as he noticed Roddy walking into his office, holding a paper bag and a box with two coffees in it.

"Really, did she tell you?" Roddy asked. Eyes sparkling with delight. He placed the box that held the coffees on the desk. Putting the paper bag on the desk as well.

"Nah, a CI told me," Adam spoke, as he took one of the coffees, Roddy stopped opening the paper bag. Looking at Adam curiously.

"Right, is this CI Carson?" He asked as he grabbed his food.

Adam shrugged his shoulders.

"Be careful, I know you want to solve this case..." Roddy started to say only for Adam to cut him off.

"And I have, all I have to do is run her first name through the database, filter it to missing cases, and I have her identity," Adam spoke.

"Right, well I'll leave you to it, I'm on my lunch break," Roddy spoke. Picking up the box that only held one coffee cup now, as well as picking up the brown paper bag.

"Call me if you need me," Roddy spoke, as he walked away. Adam moved his hand in a dismissive gesture.

Adam typed y/n in the database, filtering it to missing, a few names popped up. He looked at every single one of them, feeling deflated. Adam pressed on another one. A smile gracing his lips as he saw the woman had the same similar facial features as you.

"Bingo, Y/n Halstead," Adam cheered.

Adam opened another tab, going into google. He typed in Y/n Halstead. Smiling proudly as he saw results. He went into an article. Reading the words that were written, he scrolled down, till he reached a video. Adam pressed play on the video.

A police officer looked up at the camera with sad eyes. Letting out a sigh before speaking.

"My name is officer Smith," Austin spoke voice full of pain. He looked down at the ground, letting out a sigh. He looked back up with glassy eyes.

"Y/n Halstead has been missing for months, her brother Jay was the last one to see her, y/n might be my ex, but I still care deeply for her. Y/n has been involved with Roman Reigns a notorious mob boss, I believe he may have caused her harm or killed her. Unfortunately, we haven't found y/n yet, but we are hoping if we find Roman and his accomplish Jey, we will hopefully get information on where he is holding her or buried her. If you have any information or potential leads please don't hesitate to call this number on the screen, as well as my number which is flashing across the screen. We just want y/n back Roman; we won't charge you if you cooperate," Officer Smith spoke.

Adam quickly paused the video. Grabbing a sticky note and a pen. He saw a picture of a woman showing on the screen as well as the numbers, it looked a lot like the unidentified woman.

He wrote both numbers down on the sticky note. Adam picked up the phone in his office. Calling Officer Smith's phone number.

Adam heard the phone ringing. Officer Smith picked up on the third ring.

"Hello, officer Smith speaking," Austin spoke.

Adam smirked leaning back on his chair, as he looked out the window. He noticed it was night time.

"Hello, officer Smith, this is officer Cole, I think I have some information on your ex-girlfriend, Y/n Halstead, an unidentified woman who came into our town, and after doing a little digging I believe she is Y/n Halstead," Adam spoke.

"Send me the details of your county and I will come," Austin spoke. As Adam smirked not knowing the danger that was laying ahead....

• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

Connor heard muffled crying coming from the guest room as he locked his front door. He quickly rushed into the guest room. Pulse racing.

Connor opened the door rushing inside the bedroom to see you hugging your legs with your uninjured arm. Rocking back and forth. Tears falling from your eyes. Your body was shaking.

"Y/n," Connor called out softly. His voice full of worry, as he cautiously came over to you.

You flinched as he neared you. Letting out a soft whimper. It broke his heart.

"It's just me, Connor," He spoke with a soft reassuring voice. You looked up at him with teary eyes. Lips trembling. It broke his heart even more.

"I remember what he did, what he did to me, how he abused me, how he hit me till I passed out, or maybe he believed I was dead," You sobbed out. Connor looked so heartbroken.

He quickly sat beside you. Wrapping his arms around you. You immediately fall into him. Holding onto him for dear life, as your body trembled.

"I'm here," He reassured you. His hand rubbing up and down your back. Rubbing soothing circles.

Whispering comforting and reassuring words to you. Eventually, your sobs subsided, your eyes growing heavily, slowly drifting back to sleep in Connor's arms.

Connor looked down at you with a sad expression. He was worried about you. Having you in his arms was too painful, especially when you didn't remember him or the history he and you shared. Connor delicately placed you down on the bed. Pulling the sheet over your body. Gazing at you for a second, before he turned around. Quietly walking out the door. He closed the door ever so softly.

Letting out a small sigh, he took out his phone. Unlocking it and going into the contacts. Scrolling down his contacts till he found Jay's contact. Connor pressed on it. Pressing the call icon. Bringing the phone up to his ear.

Connor waited till Jay picked up. When he did, he didn't wait till Jay said anything.

"Hey jay, it's your sister, she came to Florida, all banged up with no memory loss, and I'm worried about her," Connor spoke softly.

Connor heard heavy breathing.

"She's alive..." Jay gasped out.

"Yeah," Connor responded.

"Don't go anywhere I'm coming to get her," Jay spoke. Connor heard rustling on the other end, then a vehicle starting before he heard the phone cut off...

• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

Hailey exited the coffee shop. Holding the cardboard cup holder and a takeout bag. She had to beg Jay to take a break with her. Though he told the rest of the team to keep him informed. Hailey smiled politely at a woman as the woman passed her. Hailey heard a vehicle starting up, as well as tires screeching on the road. Hailey saw Jay drive off in a hurry without her. She quickly went over to a table. Putting the cardboard cup holder and bag on the table. She grabbed her walkie-talkie.

"Jay, what the hell?" She spoke into the walkie-talkie.

"I'm sorry, but I found news about y/n," Jay spoke. Cutting the walkie-talkie off.

Hailey was about to talk again when Kim's voice came through the walkie talkie

"Jay, Hailey, Austin got a call from a Florida police officer that y/n is in Florida,"

Hailey let out a relieved sigh, then felt a wave of anxiety wash over her at the thought of your ex finding you first. Possibly killing you.

"Can you pick me up, Jay must have found out first and left me here at a small coffee shop," Hailey spoke.

"Yeah, sure," Kim spoke, through the walkie-talkie...

• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

You woke up with a gasp. Drenched in sweat. You looked around to realize you were alone. The house was quiet. He either left or was avoiding you or he was working. A frown formed on your lips. You slowly got up. Your temple throbbing as you did so.

You glanced at the alarm clock on the bed. Eyes widening as you realized it was 11:59 am. You quickly got up. Rushing to the bathroom stripping off your clothes. Turning the taps on to the bathtub.

You quickly did your morning routine, then got dressed. Rushing out of the door. You rushed to the café shop. Seeing Kyle sitting at a table. Looking slightly sad. He heard footsteps approaching him. He looked up to see you approaching him. His face lighting up with happiness.

"I am so sorry, I had a rough night, and I overslept," You spoke. Smiling at him.

"It's okay, are you okay?" Kyle asked as he got up. He was going to pull your chair out for you, but you already sat down. Kyle sat back down awkwardly. Ear burning red with embarrassment.

"Yeah," You responded.

"I have some news, Adam found out your name, it is Y/n Halstead, also, your ex-Austin Smith is coming," Kyle spoke. Kyle noticed your whole demeanor changed to a look of pure fear.

Your heart was beating faster. As flashbacks flashed of Austin hurting you. As well as beating you until you passed out. He probably thought you were dead, and now he found you, he was going to kill you.

"I have to go," You gasped out. Standing up abruptly. The chair clattered to the ground. Not that you cared. You rushed off leaving Kyle to look at you with a worried expression. You were not okay...

You ran as fast as your legs could take you. Passing people. Some of them looked at you like you were on drugs.

You felt a hand clamp around your mouth, then an arm wrap around your body. Pulling you closer to their body. You kicked wildly. Trying to free yourself. But they were stronger. They dragged you down the alleyway. You screamed for help. But their hand clamped down hard on your mouth. Muffling your cries for help. You saw Kyle in the distance, but he couldn't see you. Tears fell from your eyes, as they dragged you to the car. What if this person was Austin or someone he paid. Austin lived in Chicago. Surely, he wouldn't have come to Florida that quick.

They opened the back door. Pushing you into the car. They slammed the door shut. Walking to the front driver's side getting in.

You saw two guys turn to look at you. You shivered in fear.

"You're really alive," Roman gasped out. While you just whimpered, tears falling from your eyes rapidly. He reached out to wipe your tears away, but you flinched, moving back. Roman's facial expression turned into a look of sadness.

"Who are you? Are you going to kill me?" You gasped out. Roman looked at Jey. Before looking back at you. Making you even more anxious.

"I'm Roman, we were dating till your ex kidnapped you and tortured you, but your alive now and that's all that matters, this is Jey, my cousin" Roman spoke. Pointing at Jey who was in the driver's side. Roman glanced at Jey. Jey started the car up, the doors locked making you panic. Driving away. You passed Kyle, along the way. Your pulse racing. You didn't have many options, the doors were locked, the windows were tinted dark. Even if you did pound on the window, it's not like Kyle could see you. Your only option was to wait till they stopped at a petrol station and flee...

• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

Austin stepped off the helicopter that landed on a field. He smiled as he saw Officer Cole leaning against a car. He walked over to him with confidence.

Once he reached officer Cole. He stuck out his hand. Shaking hands with him.

"She's living with Connor Rhodes," Adam spoke. Making Austin's jaw clenched tight. Austin smiled at Adam.

"Then we should check there first," Austin spoke. Making Adam smile.

Adam walked towards the driver's side, while Austin walked towards the passenger side. Adam and Austin got into the car. Adam started the car, driving off. Adam sped towards Connor's apartment. Silence settling in.

Adam parked the car in front of the apartment complex. Austin got out before Adam could even utter a word. Adam got out as well. Catching up to Austin. Both took the elevator.

Adam pressed the top floor. Austin and him waiting for the elevator to reach the top floor. Adam could sense Austin was in no mood to chat.

The elevator reached the top floor. The doors slide open. Austin and Adam walked out of the elevator.

"His room is the one at the end," Adam spoke. As they both walked to the last room.

Austin roughly smashed his shoulder into the door. Breaking it. Adam looked surprised at the action.

Austin quickly walked into the apartment. Looking for you. Calling out your name but no answer.

He let out a frustrated grunt. Looking out the window. Clenching his fists. He Saw a few cameras scattered around.

He turned wildly around to face Adam.

"Do those security cameras work?" Austin asked.

"Yeah, I can get the tech to send me the feed if you want," Adam replied.

"That would be great," Austin grumbled.

Adam quickly did what Austin requested. Coming over to Austin once he got the feed.

"The tech guy sent me this," Adam spoke. Showing him the video. It was you running, then a hand grabbed your mouth. Pulling you into the alleyway. A few minutes later a car went out of the alleyway.

"Track the car's plates, put a bolo on that car, it's Roman, we have to save her," Austin ordered. As he exited the apartment. Adam hot on his trail. Doing what Austin asked...

• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

Nerves ran through your body, as you made yourself look small.

Roman and Jey were talking amongst themselves. Roman turned around to look at you. He was about to speak when a car crashed into the driver's side, causing such force the car flipped over.

Glass shattered everywhere; the car rolled a couple of times till it stopped on the roof. Roman, Jey, and you all knocked unconscious.

Memories came flooding back to you. Your relationship with Austin, Roman, and you, when he first saved you from Austin, Connor and you having a friend with benefits relationship. Letting him leave Chicago without telling him about your feelings for him, Austin hurting you, walking to this town, your two brothers Jay and Will, everything came back to you in a rush.

Your eyes fluttered open, as you let out a gasp of pain. Everything hurt. Blood crusted on the top of your head. Nose bleeding. You were sure you dislocated your shoulder. Lucky it was the one with the sling.

You looked around your surroundings to realize you were upside down. Your hand reached down to your seatbelt. Undoing it. Suppressing a yelp of pain. If your shoulder wasn't dislocated before it definitely was now that you fell shoulder first onto the roof.

You crawled out of the car. Glass scraping your skin. You staggered to Roman's side. Pressing your index and middle finger against his windpipe. It was faint. Blood was running down his forehead. You looked past him to see how Jey was. Only to see the steering wheel embedded into his stomach. You reached over to check his pulse. But felt nothing. Your stomach turned. You quickly unbuckled Roman. Pulling him out of the car with great difficulty.

Roman's eyes fluttered open. He looked up at you with glazed eyes.

"Roman," You gasped out. Your hand stroking his cheek. Looking down at him with worried eyes.

"Y/n..." Roman grumbled out.

"I remember you," You gasped out. Tears pricking your eyes.

Roman smiled. Before coughing. You quickly accessed his body for wounds. Finding a large piece of glass sticking out of his leg. Before you could treat it, Roman grabbed your hand. Looking at you.

"Is Jey okay?" Roman asked. Making your pulse quicken. You shook your head no.

Roman's eyes watered. He opened his mouth to say something, but a sound of a gunshot rang out. Your eyes widen as you saw a bullet wound in the side of Roman's temple. You let out a scream. Shuffling away from Roman. Breathing getting heavier. You looked up to see your ex- Austin stalking towards you. You quickly got up. Running into the woods. Austin following you.

"You can run but you can't hide," He shouted. As you ran faster. Tree branches scratching your skin, you looked back now and then.

"Come on. y/n, let's finish what we started," Austin shouted. He sounded close. You quickly looked behind you, not noticing a root of a tree sticking out, your foot got caught and you tripped over.

You heard footsteps coming towards you. Looking around. Seeing a thick brunch on the ground. Wrapping your fingers around the brunch. You turned around to see Austin looming above you. You quickly got up. Swinging the brunch hard against his temple. It stunned him. You tried to run away but Austin wrapped his arms around you. Tackling you to the ground with such force it knocked the wind out of you. He turned you around to face him. Sitting on you, so you didn't escape. You tried to escape but you couldn't escape.

Austin looked at you with wild eyes.

"Do it," You growled. Glaring at him.

"I don't want to, but I have to, I love you so much, y/n know that but sometimes you make me angry," Austin spoke. Pressing the muzzle of the gun to your forehead.

Before he could pull the trigger another sound of a gun firing cut through the air. Austin's eyes glazed over as he slumped down on top of you. You quickly pushing him off you.

"Y/n," Jay gasped out. Rushing over to you.

Jay helped you up.

"Jay," You gasped out. As you wrapped your arms around him. Hugging each other.

"I remember..." You sobbed out. As Jay hugged you tighter.

"It's okay, I've got you, he can't hurt you anymore," Jay spoke. Pulling away from you. You nodded. Feeling slightly dizzy.

Jay looked at you with concern. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you fainted. Jay quickly caught you picking you up and rushing out of the woods. He didn't stop running till he reached his truck. Opening the back door, place you gently down on the back seat. He closed the door. Quickly going to the driver's side. Opening the door and getting in. shutting the door. Jay turned the keys, putting the handbrake down, he started the truck, pressing his foot down hard on the accelerator. Speeding off towards the nearest hospital. Speeding through every red light.

Jay stopped at the emergency entrance, hopping out and opening the back door. Grabbing hold of you. He rushed into the hospital.

"Help my sister, she fainted," Jay shouted. Nurses rushed over to Jay, taking you out of his arms and onto a gurney. Wheeling you off, leaving Jay to look at the doors they took you through...

Jay sat on the uncomfortable chair, in the waiting room. Waiting for news on how you were. He looked up as he heard footsteps making their way over to him. Jay glared at Connor.

"Jay..." Connor started to say but Jay cut him off.

"You could have called me early when she came into this town," Jay grunted. Standing up.

"Jay..." Connor tried to speak again but Jay cut him off.

"Is she okay?" He asked.

"Yeah, just a concussion, and a dislocated shoulder," Connor spoke. Making Jay sigh.

"You can see her if you want," Connor spoke. Jay nodded his head. As he silently followed Connor to your room. Biting his tongue.

Jay quickly walked into your room. Feeling slightly relieved.

"Hey Jay," You spoke softly. Noticing Connor at the door. Your gaze turned back to your twin brother.

Jay quickly wrapped his arms around you. Making you let out a tiny groan as he bumped your shoulder. Jay loosened his grip. Pulling away and sitting on the side of the bed. Looking at you through tear-filled eyes.

"Come back to Chicago with me," Jay spoke. Your eyes glanced to the door to see Connor wasn't there. Your heart plummeting to the pit of your stomach. You nodded your head. Jay smiled brightly. Glad you were coming home with him.

"I'm going to go get something to eat, do you want something?" Jay asked. You nodded your head no, Jay hugged you again, before leaving to the vending machine.

Jay took out some spare change, putting it into the slot. Pressing the number on the vending machine. Jay's eyes wandered off. Seeing an officer get treated. He quickly grabbed his food, walking slowly. He listened to the conversation. Hearing your ex's name being bought up.

"He crashed into that car," Adam spoke. Jay put two and two together. Anger rising within him.

"I'm so glad you are okay," A nurse spoke.

"You teamed up with my sister's ex, what is wrong with you," Jay snapped. Glaring at Adam, as he stood in the door frame.

"I didn't know," Adam gasped out looking at Jay with a guilty expression.

"I hope you have a bad time sleeping at night," Jay bitterly spoke. Turning around and walking back to your room. Seeing a guy with brown hair holding flowers stand in the middle of the hallway looking into your room, a deflated look on his face. Jay arched an eyebrow. Walking up to him. He looked at what he was looking at, seeing Connor and you talking. Connor was holding your hand.

"Who are you?" Jay asked. Making Kyle jump in fright. Kyle turned to look at the person who spoke to him.

'Kyle, I saved, y/n when she first came here," Kyle responded. Making Jay nod thoughtfully.

"Thanks, but y/n is fine now, she's going back to Chicago," Jay spoke. Making Kyle's heart sink.

"Um, can you give these to her," Kyle spoke, handing Jay a boutique of flowers. Kyle turned around and left, looking dejected.

Jay listened in on what Connor and you were talking about.

"Jay wants me to go back to Chicago though, but to want to give us another try," You spoke. Making Connor smile.

"Me too, I will come back to Chicago with you," Connor spoke. Making you smile.

Jay quickly walked into the room just as Connor and you were about to kiss. Connor and you glanced at him. You arched your eyebrows at him. He shrugged putting the flowers on the side table. He wasn't sure where Kyle and you stood, and he didn't want to jeopardize the relationship that Connor and you had.

"I got you flowers, and also none of that PDA stuff, I just got you back I don't need Connor to hog you," Jay joked. Making Connor and you smile. Letting out a small laugh...

A/N: FEEDBACK IS APPRECIATED! You can also find this series on wattpad & ao3 links in the reblog I reblogged of this.

[firelxdykatara]

ppl love to forget that katara: 1. has her own taste, 2. developed around aang, he needed her for his development and vice versa, 3. ZUTARA IS SHIP BETWEEN AN OPPRESOR X OPPRESSED!!! Ignoring all of the development they had with their respective partners and the trauma Zuko caused Katara!!

In the infamous words of one Luke Skywalker: amazing. every word of what you just said was wrong.

It’s actually kind of ironic that you bring up Katara’s taste, since, throughout the show, we have examples of the guys she likes, to greater or lesser extents in canon--Jet (explicit romantic feelings on her part, word of god that jet was her first kiss--a kiss that would have been consensual, incidentally, something you should keep in mind for later) and Haru (she denies the crush, but that could just as easily have been because of the abomination he’d been growing on his lip rather than denying those feelings ever existed), both of whom have much more in common (in terms of both emotional and physical maturity, and physical appearance) with Zuko than either of them has with Aang.

Zuko’s book 3 hairstyle is almost exactly reminiscent of Jet’s, even, if not quite as floofy.

(This is probably in part because of Jet’s function as a foil of Zuko within the narrative, particularly given their book 2 encounters, which I think just further solidifies my point that, were it not for extenuating circumstances [like the fact that Zuko was introduced as an enemy and they had significant obstacles to hurdle before they could be friends], Zuko would have been exactly Katara’s type. Had they met under different circumstances, she could have been the girl he went on a date with in Ba Sing Se. Just something to think about.)

So, yes, we’ve established that Katara has her own taste. Her tastes seem to be boys with great hair who are taller than her, the same age or older, and of a similar maturity level.

Aang falls short (heh, short) on all counts. So it isn’t Katara’s taste in boys that led her to be interested in him. Hm!

Next, you claim that Katara ‘developed around Aang’--that she was necessary for his development, and that he was necessary for hers.

Let’s take a moment to examine that, shall we?

I will absolutely grant you that Katara was necessary for Aang’s development--only to a point, of course, but we’ll get to that later--but was he really necessary for Katara‘s growth? I suppose I could grant you this on a generous technicality--he did, after all, provide her with the means to finally leave the South Pole and find a waterbending master to teach her (although she wound up largely self-taught anyway). But that had nothing to do with his relationship to Katara and everything to do with the structure of the plot--Katara and Sokka find Aang (and he never would have gotten out of that iceberg without Katara’s own righteous anger, so even that leads back to her own power), and then they go on a quest to find teachers for the Chosen One and save the world.

The story could not have begun without first finding Aang and then providing means for the other main characters to travel with him (or, in Zuko’s case, chase him), but this has nothing at all to do with Aang’s relationship to Katara. Aang was not a mover in Katara’s developmental arc--if anything, he acted as an obstacle more often than not, his actions ranging from innocent but obnoxious (playing and flirting with girls rather than helping with chores like picking up vital supplies, leaving Katara to do all of the quite literal heavy lifting and keeping her stuck in the role of caretaker that she’d been thrust into following the death of her mother), to deliberate and harmful (hiding the map to Katara and Sokka’s father, a truly selfish action, regardless of his lack of malicious intent, and one for which he never actually apologized), to somewhere in between (”she didn’t really mean that” he says to the man refusing to train Katara because she’s a girl, when yes, she very much did mean that, and Aang was no help in finally getting the old codger to eat his words--Katara had to shove them down his throat her own damn self).

While Katara’s overall arc wasn’t exactly big and dynamic (like Zuko’s redemption arc), or in-your-face (like Sokka getting force-fed Respect Women Juice and his eventual growth into a tactician and leader), it was very much present and woven into her character--and Aang had almost no part in it. He provided her with the means to get to the North Pole, but left Katara alone to fight the patriarchy herself. He messed around while Katara took it on herself to do the chores and keep the Gaang alive, but he did almost nothing to decrease that burden so she could grow out of the caretaker role. (Contrary to popular shipper claims, Aang didn’t actually teach Katara to have fun. She already knew how to have fun. But she couldn’t indulge, because she had a responsibility to her family and her tribe, and later to her brother and Aang and Toph, and Aang goofing off and trying to get her to do the same only added to her burdens rather than subtracting from them.) He provided Katara with the necessary motive to learn to heal herself, but he certainly didn’t seem to learn from the experience of accidentally burning her, preferring instead to claim he was never going to firebend again, despite already knowing, at that point, that he was going to need to master fire along with the other elements to become a fully realized Avatar and defeat the Firelord.

He didn’t help Katara keep them alive during The Desert. (In fact, he ran off, leaving her to desperately try to keep Sokka and Toph from succumbing to the heat while worrying for his safety.) In The Painted Lady, Katara makes the decision to stall the Gaang and do what she can to help the Fire Nation villagers on her own--Aang agrees to help her when he finds out, but he wasn’t actually instrumental in her making that choice. The Puppetmaster was, again, Katara finding a master of her own, and having to deal with the fallout from that. And in The Southern Raiders, Aang was--perhaps unknowingly, if I’m being generous, because he is a child and could not reasonably be expected to fully understand the implications of what he was asking her to do or why it was impossible--actively impeding Katara’s development! She desperately needed closure, something he could not understand and actively belittled and dismissed. The only reason he relented in the end (but not without a condescending ‘I forgive you! Does that give you any ideas???’ parting shot lmao) was because Katara was planning to take Appa anyway, and letting her go (and hoping she’d just magically wind up doing things his way) was easier than trying to fight her on it.

While Aang’s existence was necessary for Katara to start down her own path, she needed neither his guidance nor his approval to follow it--and absolutely nothing would change about Katara’s arc if you removed their romantic relationship entirely.

Possibly because the only changes needed to do so would be to remove the two times Aang kissed Katara without her consent (which, hopefully, no one would actually miss), and the epilogue kiss (which was awkward and unnecessary to begin with, since ending the entire show on a romantic kiss as the final shot kind of missed the point of the story to begin with, but that’s another discussion). None of these kisses (which are the only moments in which Katara’s feelings for Aang are so much as addressed; do note that addressing them, or hinting that they needed to be, is not the same as saying she exhibited any sign of reciprocating them) altered anything about Katara’s behavior, her personal arc, or (and perhaps most critically) her relationship with Aang.

It’s that last point that is really damning, as far as ‘Katara obviously had feelings for Aang, she kissed him in the finale!’ goes. Because she didn’t ‘obviously’ have feelings for him. And the fact that he kissed her before the invasion and then she forgot about it (she literally had no idea what he was talking about during the play’s intermission until he reminded her that he’d kissed her) is pretty clear evidence that she didn’t actually have feelings for him. Not the kind he had for her.

I’ve been a teenage girl. I know what it’s like to be surprise!kissed by your crush. And I absolutely for a full fact know that I had not completely forgotten about that kiss three months later and had, in fact, spent most of my waking hours thinking about it and remembering it and trying to talk to him about it. Now, granted, I was not in the middle of a war, but even if I had been, I doubt I would have needed reminding about the fact that the boy I’ve supposedly been developing feelings for had kissed me and showed clearly that he had those feelings for me too.

At the very least, if Katara was harboring feelings that she was worried about approaching until after the war, her relationship dynamic with Aang should have shifted. But it didn’t. She acted the exact same way with him after the Day of Black Sun as she did before it--that is, as a mother figure and a caretaker, responsible for his wellbeing. (And it’s clear she never took him down off the pedestal she needed him to occupy, either--let it not be said that the unhealthy aspects of their relationship only went one way.)

And book 3 is, incidentally, where Katara went from being vital to Aang’s development to being detrimental to it--or, rather, Aang’s refusal to let go of his attachment to her (despite ostensibly having done as much at the end of book 2) was. Because despite having been told by, perhaps, the greatest authority left in the world on Air Nomad culture (even more than Aang, who had left his temple with a child’s understanding of his culture that was never able to mature because he got stuck in the ice berg while his people were wiped out) that he had to let go of his possessive attachment to this girl who never even expressed the possibility that she might harbor romantic feelings for him to begin with, after Azula killed him and Katara brought him back, he went right back into the mindset of Katara is mine, it’s just a matter of time.

And the narrative validated him for it.

Notice how, during Ember Island Players, Aang says the following (emphasis mine):

“We kissed at the invasion, and I thought we were gonna be together. But we’re not.”

First of all, if you go back and watch the scene, it’s clear it wasn’t a mutual kiss. Aang sprang a surprise kiss on Katara, which left her shocked and unhappy after he flew off. (The decision to have her looking away and frowning was a deliberate one on the part of Bryke, who wanted Katara’s feelings kept ambiguous. Heaven forbid you allow the animators to make it clear that this fourteen-year-old girl who was just kissed without her consent by someone she’d never once demonstrated romantic feelings toward might actually have some. Heaven forbid she have a little agency in her own romantic narrative. But whatever.)

Second, he says he thought they were gonna be together.

He thought.

He never once even asked Katara what she thought--or even how she felt. He just assumes. He assumes that if he kisses her, she’ll kiss him back and they’ll get together. He assumes that she must have feelings for him, even though her body language is closed off and she told him with her words that she did not want to talk or think about this right now, and kisses her regardless of those signals, upsetting her and leading her to storm off.

And the narrative rewards him, because despite the fact that they don’t have a single significant scene together after that second disastrous kiss, Katara just decides off-screen that she Does Love Him Really and walks onto the balcony to make out with him.

The upshot of all this being that, while Katara was indeed instrumental to a lot of Aang’s early growth and development, Aang was not necessary for her own arc, and their romantic relationship (such as it was) actively hampered Aang’s development in book 3, while removing it would change absolutely nothing for Katara (except saving her from some painfully embarrassing memories).

As far as your third point, I’m simply not going to get baited into explaining how reducing Zutara to an ‘oppressor/oppressed’ relationship is not only insulting to interracial couples irl (not to mention any other couple with a potentially unbalanced dynamic of societal power, since there are many more axis of oppression than just racial), but demeaning to Zuko and Katara, their personal arcs as well as their relationship development together.

However, I will point out that Zuko was not responsible for any of Katara’s trauma. She did not find violence and fighting in bending battles to be traumatic--in fact, she reveled in it. She enjoyed fighting against Zuko at multiple points (especially noticeable in their battle at the end of book 1), because she wanted to fight--she always had--and once she had the ability, she was ready to throw down with anyone who gave her the slightest reason. (Including, by the way, her own potential waterbending master.) Aang’s death at the end of book 2 was Azula’s doing, and while I think that contributed to Katara’s extreme reaction to Zuko joining the gaang, it was not something for which she actively blamed him, and it wasn’t something she believed would be repeated--she let him go off alone on a journey to find the original firebending masters with Aang well before she chose to forgive him. So she already trusted Zuko’s intentions and that Aang would be safe with him.

Finally, because this has gotten long enough already, I hope you now understand that Zuko and Katara getting together would not require ignoring any of their development with their canonical romantic partners. We’ve already established that Katara’s arc wouldn’t change in the slightest if all of Aang’s romantic advances were removed, and I haven’t even gotten into how Mai meant nothing in the grand scheme of Zuko’s development because I’m pretty sure that’s just self-evident. I mean, the video compilation put together by Nick showcasing Zuko’s journey throughout the series doesn’t include a single scene with Mai, though it does include several with Katara, and even Jin makes an appearance--because Katara, and even Jin, played key roles in Zuko’s personal journey, while his relationship with Mai happened entirely off-screen and her only real function was to showcase just how unhealthy trying to force himself back into the role of the Crown Prince was for him.

What development, exactly, is there between them to even ignore?

At any rate, I’ve gone on long enough--I hope you enjoy the fact that you activated my wordvomit trap card right when i was about to go to bed, anon, because I just spent two hours writing this instead. In case you’re interested in the TL;DR: at the end of the day, there was no meaningful, mutual development in Kataang’s romantic relationship, and those romantic feelings that did exist were largely one-sided and ultimately detrimental to Aang’s development in the final third of his overall arc. Meanwhile, Mai meant nothing to Zuko’s journey--rather like Aang’s romantic overtures, she could be removed from the show completely and nothing about his story would change--while Zuko and Katara were both vital to each other’s overall storylines, arcs and development. This, coupled with the fact that Zuko never actually traumatized Katara and, in fact, helped her achieve closure from the biggest source of her own trauma, means that Zuko and Katara have better and more believable build up that could potentially lead to a romantic relationship than either of them have with their canon romantic partners.

So no, anon, I didn’t forget anything--I think you may have, though. Perhaps a rewatch is in order? Make sure not to close your eyes for the back half of book 3 this time.

[baku-bowl]

broke 1,000 followers (the fuck? I don't even make content people), so decided to write up a list of some (but not all, I'll make other lists later) of my favorite Bakugou-centric fic recs. my tastes run towards hurt/comfort, as you'll probably figure from the list. if there are some Baku-centric fics that you've enjoyed that aren't on here, please add them - this is definitely not a complete list of the ones I've read and love, but I'm always up for some recs. <3

fair warning, most of these are wips.

------------------------------------------------

Social Media 101 by WindsChild8178

Part 1: Survival Guide to Fucking Up

[Solely Bakugou’s point of view]

Katsuki Bakugou doesn’t have a gentle bone in his body. He’s aggressive in everything he does and does everything with 100% of his heart in it. After the Sport’s Festival, Katsuki starts to get harassed by strangers for his unheroic demeanor. It starts with letters but it doesn’t end there. The moment Katsuki realizes the harassment has entered dangerous territory and he needs to tell someone, it’s already too late.

Part 2: Post Traumatic Life Disorder

[Point of View opens up to Bakugou, teachers and classmates]

When the Dorms are finally built, everyone is settling in well, but things become tense as people begin to realize something isn’t right with the recently rescued Bakugou.

[Cannon compliant right up to after the License Exam]

hands down my favorite fic in the fandom right now. it’s the one that converted me into a Bakugou lover. if you have any fondness for Bakugou as a character then it’s likely you’ve read this one already, but if not, I can’t recommend it enough. incredibly depressing, but with the hope that comfort is coming soon in the next few chapters.

The Kids Will Be Alright, Eventually by NotWithThatAttitude

Bakugou is spiraling in the aftermath of Kamino and his friends are starting to notice. He's stubborn, aggressively independent, and less than willing to dig into his past, but after a breakdown that ends with a painful secret revealed, he starts to get help.

Whether he likes it or not.

Meanwhile, a new kind of villain threatens an uneasy peace following the loss of Allmight. Whispers build as a new narrative slowly takes shape:

Hero society needs to change.

Feat. Therapy, Dadzawa, best boy Kirishima, dysfunctional families, healing, growing up, and the mortifying ordeal of being known

guys.. the medical accuracy of this fic is just... *chef’s kiss*

I rarely see mental health genuinely handled well in fics, but this one goes above and beyond. kudos to the author for doing such excellent research into psychology, and making the application of it in here not-boring. also, while this one does have abusive!Mitsuki, it’s done in a way that feels realistic, and how I usually will see it occur in real life, rather than just for the hurt/comfort feels.

fair warning, the fic can be incredibly triggering (themes of severe depression, PTSD, panic attacks, rape survival, abuse survival, suicidal ideation/attempted suicide, among other things), so be safe and heed the tw’s if you decide to read. legitimately one of my Top Favorite fics in this fandom.

Lock and Key by autochorystalize

Bakugou made a choked, gravelly noise before croaking out a low, “You can’t be serious.” His fingers ached to blow up everything in the room.

“I’m sorry, young man, but you can’t change reality! This sometimes happens.” Recovery Girl clicked through his file, adding a new symbol in a previously empty slot.

- - -

A pair of eyes discreetly locked on to an explosive blond plowing his way forward, parting people in his path. He recognized the kid, of course. Anyone in the underbelly of society would recognize him, after the publicity of both UA’s Sports Festival and the events leading up to All Might’s fall. The uniform he was wearing cast away any doubts about the young man’s identity.

It was a bit of a surprise that the little firecracker presented as an omega.

- - - - - - - - -

Or: there are certain types of evil that seemed too distant, archaic violations and perversions that would never actually threaten bright-eyed heroes-in-training in the clean, modern world...but sometimes those evils aren't as distant as one might think.

remember when I said that I love a/b/o fics that are full of plot and world-building and gender-induced tension? that’s this one. the OC’s are fabulous and you love to hate ‘em. also, it’s the fic that made me fall head-over-heels for the TodoBaku dynamic, so it’s got a special place in my cold, dead heart. 

be warned, there are rather explicit non-con scenes between an adult (OC) and a minor (Bakugou) in this one, but the author warns for them in advance, and you could likely skip those parts without missing too much if you need to.

Never and Always, Eventually by Wawa_Boonliang

"Katsuki can remember the exact moment that he and Deku…that he and Midoriya Izuku became friends. He can also remember the moment he and Izuku became fierce rivals, a time when they were almost enemies.

However, what he remembers most clearly about their relationship is the moment that they moved passed rivals and became something more close than mere friends. Something more like brotherhood, something forged in fire and secured in the middle of a battlefield or in the midst of natural disaster where the number of the dead was climbing ever higher. And then it was torn from him."

Katsuki is given a second chance. A chance to save everyone. A chance to change everything.

But should he?

y’all. I’m a slutty, slutty whore for time travel fics. a time travel fic with autistic!coded Bakugou? it was love at first read.

Lessons Learned by Sif (Rosae)

Rather than the police station, Katsuki's friends bring him to a hospital after rescuing him from the villains. His wounds were minor, but it didn't make having them treated any less important. As it would so happen, Best Jeanist was also brought to this hospital after the attack.

Sometimes, small choices have a big impact on how a story plays out.

classic Bakugou hurt/comfort. this fic opened me up to the potential that could be a genuinely good Best Jeanist & Katsuki mentor-mentee relationship, and I kind of dig it and search ravenously for it in other fics now. I’m also a huge fan of the behind-the-scences Pro Hero Chat group.

Slope by sunfleurmoon

“I’m not a hero. Or a good person,” Katsuki says, giving Aizawa a pointed look, “So leave me alone. I don’t care about the League or UA, or you—” The two years he’s been away have been fine, more than fine, fucking fantastic actually if you ignore the bi-monthly near-death experiences. He doesn’t need this place. He doesn’t miss this place.

And yet, longing, a childish desire to tear up, or maybe blow something to bits, they all twist in his chest like a band of traitors regardless. “—I just want to go home.”

Or: the one where Katsuki and Izuku fail the first term exam, Aizawa discovers their pasts, and Katsuki is booted from UA. Featuring questionable descriptions of villain organizations, a slightly illegal moving shop, and your favorite emotionally constipated badass in distress with a newly discovered penchant for collecting strays.

paaaaaaiiiiiiiin. the hurt is ALIVE in this one. lots of tortured, angsty exploding child goodness. the OC’s are excellently crafted, and the Bakugou & Eri relationship? beautiful. definitely deserves a read.

Ground Zero by WindsChild8178

In the wake of Kamino, Katsuki is tested more than anyone could imagine. Bound by a villain’s quirk to keep his silence or die, he lives each day knowing it might very well be his last. He continues to work towards becoming a hero, keeping his secret from his classmates and teachers, focusing on making it through each day and trying not to allow the panic or depression to get the best of him. When the villain finally corners him with demands in exchange for his life, there is really only one answer Katsuki Bakugou can give.

honestly don't know which I want updated more - social media 101 or ground zero. this author's fics are amazing, and I really wasn't expecting the twist in this one. can't wait for windschild to come back to this fic some day.

The Defect by LadyGreenFrisbee

"Why do you want to win the Sports Festival so badly?" 

Because I want to see if the defect could usurp the masterpiece.

(In which Endeavor holds a terrible secret and Bakugo has to suffer since childhood for it.)

a great concept, and I adore the shouto and Katsuki sibling interaction here. hoping the author will come back to this one some day.

A Name That You'll Remember by Heronfem

Kirishima Eijirou is a Hero. Bakugou Katsuki... is not. Trapped in his toxic workplace and increasingly desperate to get out, Red Riot's days are only brightened by a new villain known as Caution, who's not exactly villainous and keeps accidentally doing good deeds. But when a real villain appears, a threat from the past that demands that Red Riot make the ultimate sacrifice to keep the public safe, Bakugou is forced into saving the day... and eventually, Red Riot himself.

sob story good guy villains are my weakness, this fic is a gem, and I'd kill for the sequel.

Our Hero by AnonymousTwit

He felt everything jerk to the side and throw his balance off before he saw anything, dust clouding his vision and irritating his lungs as the earth itself opened up to swallow them whole. For a single moment, in a millisecond's time, his wild eyes locked with Raccoon Eyes', hers alight with fear and adrenaline-fueled desperation. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he realized that it was the first time she'd looked at him with something other than long-deserved hatred in days.

And then he was free falling.

Or

After a particularly nasty encounter between childhood friends, the class learns about Bakugou and Midoriya's dark history and practically ostracizes Bakugou while trying to defend Midoriya. An earthquake during an outing has all sides regretting their decisions.

just fucking tear apart my self-sacrificing faves in every way imaginable while their loved ones watch on in terror. 💖🥰💖 this one is heavy on the Bakusquad and Class-1A feels, and VERY heavy on the Mina & Bakugou relationship (platonic).

Running back the tape, watching it replay by Faralyne

For someone ripped from their time, ripped from the few but strong relationships built by time and personal development, by self-reflection and swallowed pride, ripped from the one thing that made him feel worthwhile and needed and put-together, and forced to forge everything over again—Katsuki thinks he is handling it pretty fucking well.

Or

A villain’s quirk sends a 29-year-old Bakugou back in time to his middle school days.

am I a sucker for time travel? yes. am I a sucker for vigilante!bakugou? also yes. am I a sucker for this fic? literally refreshing the page in wait for an update as we speak.

Liability by sandelf

After All-Might dies rescuing Bakugou from the League, Bakugou is determined to prove it wasn't for nothing.

But the world is against him, his grief is overwhelming, and his stability is splitting at the edges.

very self-indulgent bakugou angst. tw for harassment, severe depression, and suicidality.

Special Mentions:

How To Win The Sport Festival: A Step By Step Guide by mhwright

Short re-imagining of the Sports Festival Arc if Shinso had planned a little better and worked a little harder to win the Sports Festival and if the match-ups had been slightly different. Self-indulgent fic of watching him succeed.

this is completely Shinsou-centric, not Bakugou-centric, but I love and adore it and am dying for a sequel. Shinsou is Best Boy here and you'll be rooting for him the whole time.

[ghostdrew22]

Déjà  vu? || Draco Malfoy

Requested: No Pairing: Draco Malfoy x ex!fem!reader Warnings: Idk if this is angsty or not because I initially thought it was but it feels a bit like soft sadness to me? Summary: Y/N getting deja vu as you watch Draco with his new girlfriend (H/N - her name)

WORDS : 1950

Lyrics from “Deja Vu” by Olivia Rodrigo (but I got lazy and only used certain parts)

~~~

Car rides to Malibu Strawberry ice cream, one spoon for two And tradin' jackets Laughin’ 'bout how small it looks on you (Ha-ha-ha-ha, ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, ha-ha-ha-ha)

“Draco stop!” A voice exclaims before being followed by laughter. You know that you shouldn’t turn around, that it’ll hurt too much, but it’s been said many times that curiosity killed the cat.

He’s holding the very same ice cream order, strawberry and pistachio, and sporting that familiar warm smile that used to comfort you when you got a brain freeze from the ice cream. It had been your idea, ice cream in November, and he’d hated it at first but grew to love it just because it made you happy. That very same order that you’d made him try, strawberry and pistachio, but not for the two of you this time.

It’s difficult to know what you were expecting, something new? Different? A part of you had always known, even while you were the one in H/N’s position, that your moments with Draco would soon be documented and used for a modern remake. If your relationship had been a book, theirs is the movie adaption. If your relationship had been a song, theirs is a cover band’s rendition. Maybe, deep down, you were expecting just this- to see him treating her the same way that he’d treated you.

Those pale hands, that used to fit so comfortably in the expanse of your own, are now tucked safely in-between hers. Oceans of blue that used to run over your shivering figure every November when you made this exact Hogsmeade trip, are now tracing the lines of her face and committing them to memory. Lips, cold and slightly chapped, that were once coaxing laughter from your lungs with horrible puns and crude observations, are now completely and utterly consumed with the sole objective of entertaining her the very same way that they entertained you.

It’s a bitter sight, one would think, but you can’t bring yourself to be jealous. It’s an odd sort of feeling, deja vu, to know that once this moment belonged to you, and now you have to watch it play out in front of you. You know what’s going to happen, down to the footprints that’ll stain the path back to Hogwarts, but this time it’s not you. This time, even though you know what’s going to happen next, it’s not your laughter that’ll be filling the silence as he walks back to school.

Watching reruns of Glee Bein’ annoying, singin’ in harmony I bet she’s bragging to all her friends, saying you’re so unique, hmm

“Draco’s obsessed with this muggle show called Glee. He makes me sing along with him every time we watch it.” She says with a small laugh and a shy smile.

Why, in God’s name, did you decide to study in the library today? Sitting on the other side of the bookshelf behind you, with Millicent Bulstrode, is H/N.

“That’s horrendous.” Millicent replies with a laugh. Maybe if you’d tried harder to be friends with her then she would’ve told H/N that Draco used to do that with you too, that you’re the one who introduced him to muggle tv shows in the first place.

“It’s cute, he’s so… different.”

You swallow hard and try to pour your focus back into your books. That tone, sweet and infatuated, was the tone you used only months before when you spoke about him too. Once again you’re on the other side of the looking glass, staring back at a distorted reflection of yourself. It had been you bragging, drowning quite innocently in your adoration for him and feeling the need to sing your praises out to the world.

Way back when, you were the one forcing him to learn the lyrics to all of your favourite songs. The two of you would lose track of time singing along with the actors and complaining about the unnecessary drama, it was this little world that the two of you created. But now that world, that you built on love and trust, can no longer afford to accommodate you both. Now it’s his world with her.

Without even realising it you start to wonder how it must be when he’s with her. Does she sing off-key too? Does he pepper her with kisses after and make fun of her singing? Do they binge watch episodes or only do one at a time? Does his laugh still drown out the talking whenever something ridiculous happens? Is his favourite character still Sue?

How many pieces of your time together did he take from the puzzle, to form a new one with her?

So when you gonna tell her that we did that, too? She thinks it's special, but it's all reused That was our place, I found it first I made the jokes you tell to her when she's with you

“This alcove is where I come when I want to be alone, no one really comes here.”

No one but me, you think to yourself as you stop in the hallway and overhear Draco whispering to her. Of course he took her to your alcove, why wouldn’t he?

A part of you wishes that he’d tell her that it was you who found this spot, that it was you who’d trudged along the castle one night in a desperate search for some peace and quiet. You want her to know that this was your safe space, that you were the one who invited him there and allowed him to relish in the safety that it provided. It was you who laced your fingers together with his own and dragged him behind you until you’d landed in the spot, you who had to listen to his complaints about how small and cramped it was until he finally got comfortable and fell in love with it. You were the one he used to wrap his arms around and make promises to in the silence of the night, when nothing beside the two of you existed in that alcove.

It’s all blurring together, then and now are nothing but two sides of the same rusted coin. How can you possibly distinguish between your memories and reality when the boundaries keep crossing?

You almost want to laugh at how identical your relationship was to the one they have now. Jokes that you came up with in the sludge of sleepiness, when the two of you used to hide out here on nights when you both felt sad, are now being repeated into the very same air that you breathed only months ago. Promises that you’d both agreed to back then, are being remade in the safety of the night that now belongs to them.

“I love you.”

And

“Forever.”

Are being whispered between the two of them, assurances and pacts to be together till the end of time.

But now you wonder, how long is forever?

Do you get déjà vu when she’s with you? Do you get déjà  vu? (Ah), hmm Do you get déjà vu, huh?

The smell of toast and freshly scrambled eggs wafts through the Great Hall and you struggle to resist the urge to moan out in excitement. Breakfast is your favourite meal and, really, the only meal that’s worth anything. As you plop down in your seat and start to pack your plate in your food you fail to notice, in your sheer joy, that Draco’s sitting across from you with H/N by his side.

It’s not until you’re done piling up your favourites, like an Olympic gold medalist in training, that you notice the couple sat across from you. You observe discreetly as Draco outstretches his hand all over the table to get whatever she wants to eat, and you have to struggle to focus as a wave of déjà vu washes over you.

When had you stopped being the one he arranged plates for? When had he started saving a spot beside him for her, and not you? Literally you know that the answer is roughly around 3 or 4 months ago when the two of you had broken up, but he’d stopped being yours a long time before then and you’d both known it. Little moments of love, that had been the basis of your relationship, had fizzled out into distant memories way before you’d both decided to call it quits.

“Butter or jam, Y/N?”

You’re about to answer, on instinct really, when you realise that he’s not even speaking to you.

But he said your name. Didn’t he?

Do you call her, almost say my name? ‘Cause let’s be honest, we kinda do sound the same Another actress I hate to think that I was just your type

“It was mortifying!” You exclaim as you recount the events of earlier to your best friend.

“How bad could it have possibly been?” She asks with a laugh as she settles into your bed comfortably.

“He looked her dead in the eyes, and called her ‘Y/N’, and to make it one hundred times worse, I was sitting across from them when he did it so they both immediately turned to look at me!” You cry out in embarrassment as you drop your face in a pillow. “I’ve never prayed so hard for the ground to open up and swallow me whole.” You mumble against the fabric and you hear her laugh again.

“Why are you so embarrassed? It wasn’t your mistake.”

“It’s not about that, it’s about how easy it would’ve been for us to return to our roles as boyfriend and girlfriend. I almost answered him!” You sigh. “It’s been what? 3? 4 months? And my mouth still acts on muscle memory. We’re so familiar to each other that we still act on instinct.”

“Are you sure it’s not just because your names sound so similar?” She raises her eyebrows at you and you scoff. “Really? Y/N and H/N sound nothing alike?”

“Nope, not at all.”

“Okay, if you say so.” She shrugs, “But deep down I think all three of you know that there’s more similarities present than you’d like to account for.”

You huff in response and cross your arms. Is she right? Does Draco have a type?

Even worse, are you just Draco’s type? Nothing more and nothing less than just another girl who ticks all of his favourite boxes?

I know you get déjà  vu I know you get déjà  vu I know you get déjà vu

It’s on one morning, on one of your good mornings, that it happens.

Months of watching the two of them recreate the love that you’d had with him, suffering in silence and scolding yourself for thinking such awful things about them, finally come to a halt when you receive the acknowledgment that you’ve been so desperately craving.

She walks onto platform 9 and 3/4 in a dress, a purple dress that looks eerily similar to the one you’d worn two years before on this exact platform. She’s smiling brightly, excited for the new school year, and Draco’s waiting for her by the door with a smile that’s just as bright. When his eyes catch her own and she slips her hand into his, he stumbles backward in shock slightly. He immediately looks away from her and searches the crowd, scanning over people climbing into the train and saying goodbye to their families, in a desperate attempt to find you.

It’s too much for him, to see her standing before him and looking like a replica of you, and he needs some sort confirmation to know that he’s not imagining this similarity. The dress wraps around her waist the same way that yours had wrapped around your own waist, and it compliments her skin in a way that’s hauntingly memorable. He knows that he’s seen all of this before, and he knows that it wasn’t with her.

You’re standing a few paces away from the door, watching the scene unfold, and when his ocean blues finally meet yours, you know.

He smiles at you, the first time he’s done so since you broke up, and mouthes exactly what the two of you need to hear.

“Déjà vu.”

And then it’s over- the moment, the agony, the months of confusion- it’s all packed up into a neat box and stored away. He turns with her and they walk into the train together, happily.

You remember this, being the one in her position and walking by his side. You remember the feeling of utter joy that had consumed you, it’s all the same really.

But maybe this time when he promises forever, he’ll mean it.

~~~

This was meant to be way angstier but I got lazy and ended up just wanting to write it out before I ran out of love for the idea.

Anyway, I kind of like it...

love you all,

jean <3

[arabian-bloodstream]

TWD, S11-1A Arc Thoughts So far

There be spoilers here kinda sorta, but not really, it’s really just a general thinky-thoughts post on the first arc of season 11 of The Walking Dead as its “finale” aired on AMC+ the other night.

I generally read takes on The Walking Dead after it airs and since I'm a Caryl fan, I read the takes of their fans. However, I've found myself more and more not agreeing lately with the thoughts of even those I generally do.

The overall consensus appears to be that "nothing has happened" in this first arc. That it's pointless. Carol and Daryl have been separated. Carol/Melissa McBride has barely been on screen and the Reapers are boring and awful, and this whole thing is a complete waste of time. I'm gonna have to have a big ole disagree here. Let me elucidate as to the why.

The Reapers arc is NOT about the Reapers. Carol/MMB not having much screentime sucks now, but I believe there is a reason for that.

Let's take Carol/MMB first. Carol took a lot of unwarranted hate last season. Like A LOT. A lot lot lot..... Like a crazy, ridiculous amount of hate. Melissa McBride was ALL OVER the show last season. She was front and center all over the place. And she was magnificent... for Carol fans. Outside of Carol fans? She was hated. People were done with her. They were over. They wanted her gone. They didn't have sympathy for her. They didn't care that every child she loved, raised as her own, cared for was killed. They did not care. They didn't care that she was/is suffering other loads of trauma. They don't care how brilliant Melissa McBride is. They were just done with Carol's shit. Period. Done, finished, over.

Angela Kang REALIZED that. She also knows that Daryl and Carol are the HEART and SOUL and FUTURE of this franchise. Literally. There is a spin-off with those two. And if one-half of that future has a vocal majority of the online fanbase (and I've gone to other sites--just random, discussing TWD sites) that are tired of Carol's "shit," something has to be done to shift that attitude. So, guess what? Something is being done. Carol, in this first arc, is being shown sparingly, not shoved down anyone's throat. She is still getting shit done. She is fighting to save Alexandra. She was the one fighting to save Connie, BUT, she didn't get the glory shot. That was Kelly --as it should have been. And then Connie (and Kelly) in this latest episode both made the very clear choice that they wanted to help/work with Carol.

Kang is not sidelining Carol because she doesn't like her or because she's giving into the Carol-haters. She is doing this to ease the hate that had been thrown at Carol last season, rehabilitate her image while Carol rectifies her mistakes, when she pushed every one away, her vengeance helping to cause some of the issues that are facing Alexandria now. Carol is now helping to stop Aaron from going down the same path, leading the charge to save Connie, etc. So when the next arc begins and we see Carol more again--as I’m sure we will, it will be with a fresh perspective and a renewed appreciation for her character.

(Note: I know that Carol is extremely popular still. I’m just saying that they still want to ease the online hate for her.)

As for the Reapers. This arc is about three characters: Daryl, and Maggie and Negan. Let's start with Maggie, and Maggie and Negan.

We haven't seen Maggie for years. She was a major player on the show, so naturally she is going to get a major arc upon her return. This is her major arc. I think we had two options. We could see her dealing with her (understandable) Negan issues in Alexandria which would have taken away from Carol's arc, involving Carol and all she did, letting Negan out, bringing Alpha into it, stirring up resentment between her and Maggie--which would undermine what Kang is trying to do for Carol! 

OR, she could take Maggie and Negan OUT of Alexandria and have Maggie deal with her (understandable) Negan issues away from Carol, not bringing her into it.  Let Maggie and Negan hash it out together. That's what Kang did, that's what she is doing. This is Maggie's arc, it's getting her to a place where she can live in some kind of harmony with Negan. This HAD to be done to give Maggie any kind of "happy" ending. It had to happen, and it had to happen away from Alexandria/Carol to give Carol her fresh start with viewers to stop the haterade parade.

Now, Daryl... Kang's first season as showrunner, well, the first half was basically spent getting things back on track after the mess that Gimple had made of the last 3-4 seasons. The next half of that season was deeply exploring Carol's character, going in-depth on that bad boy. The next season--which was last--continued that exploration, but also added a season-long deep dive into the bond between Carol and Daryl. So, what are we getting now? Why naturally, a deep exploration into who? Daryl Dixon!

I adored the episode "Find Me," and I'm so thrilled that we got it. The original plan was to include the romantic relationship with Leah in a few flashbacks when Leah was introduced with the Reapers. I'm so happy it didn't happen that way because (a) it would have lessened the depth of exploration of Daryl's character, and (b) it would have jettisoned the gorgeous Carol parallels. Having this whole arc about the Reapers isn't pointless, doesn't not matter because Daryl isn't pointless, Daryl doesn't not matter.

Because we had that parallel between Leah and Carol, we can see so clearly that Daryl has a type. (Take that, Carol ain't his type, hah!) We can also see that Daryl will always try and save people. Yes, yes, we already knew that, but because of this arc, we see that Daryl has learned, finally!, that once the jig is up, the jig is damn well up and when you can't save someone, you can't save them. We're also seeing different sides of Daryl, that he can blend in, that he has learned from Carol.  

As for Caryl, Daryl and Carol can't be Caryl until both sides are healed enough to stop talking in circles and truly talk. We saw that in "Find Me." Carol is healing. If she doesn't let herself heal, she'll constantly be torn apart by guilt. Daryl is finding that he can't save everyone, he has to save those who matter most TO HIM. Otherwise, he's constantly going to try and save everyone and be torn apart by guilt. They have to do these things separately.

They already know they have each other's backs. They already know the other will NEVER turn on the other, leave the other. That's not in question. Carol has been broken inside. Daryl can't fix that. Daryl has a martyr complex trying to save everyone. Carol can't stop him. That is something they have to figure out themselves or it won't work. So... again, Carol is healing. Daryl is figuring it out.

And then they will come together. For now, in this arc, they are getting their ducks in a row, it’s just a separate thing. So, the first arc of this season? Not pointless at all, in my opinion.

[angelicmichael]

hoax - chapter two

Michael Langdon x Mallory

Summary: Mallory tries her best to put her feelings aside and to tolerate Michael; however she finds that she gets tested in other ways that aren’t so easily predictable..

Words: 6.3k+

Warnings: more death and general mentions of it.. sorry lmao, angst, blood, manipulation, unhealthy relationships, mentions of satan and satanism, slowburn, plot heavy, enemies to lovers, also reminder that this is a dark fic so.. it’s just generally not that happy of a story lol

A/N: Hey guys! Sorry if this seems random since we just got new cody content and a new character but I thought I would just upload this anyway since it’s finished 👉🏻👈🏻. But this is also the longest thing I’ve ever written.. like ever so hopefully y’all like it haha. Also fyi; Michaels and Mallorys POV switches quite a bit throughout this chapter lol.

Previous Chapter

Michael watched Mallory intently. Looking as she continued to be lost in thought. Her gaze fixated downwards at her black boots, which twitched slightly as she continued to most likely debate whether he was worth it or not… to say yes or no..

Michael swallowed, wishing he could do something to make her say yes, to maybe offer something but after all; he had absolutely nothing. Even Michael by himself seemed to be too much of a burden on its own, to Mallory.

He let out a dry cough; hoping to bring her back to reality, back to him.

Mallory’s head snapped up - brown eyes looking up at him curiously.. as if she really did forget that he was still waiting for a response or some type of agreement. She tried her best to relax her shoulders as well as her mind before speaking. Trying to silently convince herself to not snap at him, no matter how much she still truly wanted too. However, looking at him made that far more easier..

Michaels words; the pleading and begging that Mallory was almost convinced would never stop.. The pure desperation and urgency only really reflected onto his appearance. Sandy blonde hair that nearly looked brown due to the disgusting amount of dirt in it.. clothes that were still horribly stained and nearly doused with blood made him look hardly short of intimidating anymore, but the urge to yell at him still didn’t wane.

Anger still stayed present in Mallory’s chest, but it was starting to become something she couldn’t just ignore anymore.. it flowed through her veins, hot and fresh. It made her skin warm and her cheeks flush cherry red. Something she was typically insecure about but she really didn’t have the time or patience to try and hide it.. she doubted Michael realistically was even paying close enough attention to notice anyways.

“Fine,” Mallory finally answered. Her voice was soft and low which was merely a result of her biting her anger back - something she still desperately wanted to show but knew realistically would get her no where with him.

She tried her best to avoid Michaels gaze which still stayed solely focused on her figure. He seemed almost taken aback by her words, as if he was expecting to be further yelled at.. which wasn’t exactly a wrong assumption. The only reason Mallory found it in her to be nice was merely sympathy. After all they both had a long day - it wasn’t just her discomfort she had to take into consideration anymore.

“Do you trust me?”

The words almost felt impulsive to say but she didn’t regret saying them - after all; if they were really going to be sticking around by each other for a while then.. it was a valid question.

Mallory knew realistically what he was going to say and she tried to brace herself as she saw his mouth open hesitantly.

“I feel like I should.. why?” He asked in a tone which sounded purely dismissive and a bit annoyed.

Mallory wanted to smile, she wanted to grin and laugh that she was finally starting to get what she wanted but.. she did neither of those things. Instead she found herself immeadietly distrusting him.. wanting to know why on earth she would ever think to trust his words for a second when she literally killed him in the past.. and that’s not counting the other times where she attempted to do so or even thought doing it but; this Michael didn’t know that. This Michael barely even knew her name, let alone anything else about her but that didn’t matter to him - and she couldn’t help but to be a bit relieved at that feeling of finally being able to be free from her past.

Atleast for the time being.

“I need to go somewhere but I can’t go alone.. I think it would be good if you went too.”

Michaels brows furrowed at this; his face almost upturning in a sneer. “Where?”

Mallory took in a deep breath but didn’t exhale at first.. feeling irritated that he just had to keep asking questions that she didn’t have the answer too.

“I’ll tell you later, when we get closer, okay? But we need to go before the sun sets,” she explained.

Mallory hoped desperately that what she said would be enough reason for Michael to go along with her.. but thankfully it seemed to be. Or he seemed convinced for the most part, anyway.

“What happens before the sun sets?” He asked.

His blue eyes glared into hers - as if he was trying to get a read on her.. just like how he used too at the outpost.

Mallory’s throat suddenly grew dry at this realization.. Feeling incredibly uncomfortable at how he looked at her, and his question. Not necessarily knowing what to do about either situations but - she hoped for a second he would retract his words or rephrase but he didn’t.

He still waited.

“That doesn’t matter, we just need to get going. You said you trusted me right?” Mallory reaffirmed.

Her face was mostly expressionless as she watched Michael solemnly nod in response.

“Yeah.. sure. I trust you.”

His sentence cut off almost abruptly; as if he wanted to keep talking but knew that Mallory wouldn’t have the patience to hear him out - or that she simply didn’t want too.

Michael couldn’t really pinpoint exactly how he felt around Mallory. Every time she met his gaze he couldn’t help but to be overtaken briefly by far too many emotions than he could count. It mainly was a fight over feeling intimidated and being in awe. Even though Mallory hadn’t really let her powers show since she basically assaulted him earlier; he knew to keep his distance now.. to a degree.

He approached her now; feeling a little less intimated than he was before since she seemed to be acting civil.

Michael couldn’t help but to blame her behavior on himself; maybe he was too straight forward.. maybe it was him who was the true freak in this situation.. It wouldn’t exactly be the first time that he found himself in a situation like this, another situation that was surely his fault.

God.. why was he such a fuck up??

The closer he approached.. Mallory.. she said her name was right?? He felt almost sick to his stomach when he saw the look in her eyes when she finally bothered to look up at him. Her eyes (which he remembered were a golden honey brown when she stood directly in the sun) were nearly black now.. maybe it was the fact that the sun was finally dipping behind the trees.. or.. something else? Annoyance was really the only emotion he could read from her at the moment - the rest of her face was even harder to read. He guessed she was trying to remain expressionless on purpose.

Mallory was the first one to start walking - and Michael let her lead. She seemed to have a some kind of idea on where she was going since she had claimed she said a destination in mind, or somewhere for them to go.

Hopefully that wasn’t a lie.

Mallory didn’t look back once as Michael continued to walk directly behind her once the path she had chosen to walk on had thinned down to a trail. The sound of his footsteps were good enough proof that he hadn’t wandered off or turned around. She didn’t want to necessarily look at him longer than what she had too - she was more than certain that he still wore that kicked puppy look he had earlier. It was pathetic and painful.. and only a sharp reminder of why things currently were the way they were. Why she was here; still in the forest with twigs and leaves snapping onto her overly expensive dress which now had to be ruined.. (as if it wasn’t already from Michaels death fiasco’s) and not back at Robichaux.. with the witches where she belonged. Even if none of them necessarily knew her anymore.

Mallory belonged with other witches, her sisters. People that actually understood her and gave a fuck - not.. whatever she could even call Michael now. Who was not quite human but probably not the antichrist now, either.

That was just something else that Mallory would have to do and figure out on her own but, this wasn’t something that was meant to be done solo - she knew that deep down.

Michael was following her diligently and actually listening now for a reason, she came to the forest for a reason, and as much as she tried her best to avoid thinking about it; she also talked to satan for a reason.. And even though he was mostly a manipulative asshole- no.. not mostly. That’s exactly what he was. Michael was also proof of that.

No matter what, her and Michael would figure it out together.. on their own or certaintly without the help of him. They didn’t need him, not again.. not now.. not ever. It didn’t matter if he apparently owned her soul or not - she still felt the same.. nothing could’ve changed that quickly. Right?

That’s what she would tell herself anyway - and there’s no way she would ever dream of telling Michael any of that shit ever happened. It’s not like he would remember anyway.

Mallory continued to keep her head down as they kept walking .. deep in thought and trying to focus on just finding their way out until she felt something soft brush up against the back of her arm..

Mallory immeadietly paused when she felt Michael touch her, looking at her arm almost awkwardly and bearing witness to how Michael was now gently gripping her.. Hoping naively that it was something that happened accidentally but of course it wasn’t. Nothing happened by coincidence with Michael.

He let go after a couple seconds of awkward eye contact.. most likely realizing that she wasn’t exactly a touchy person. Not with him anyway. Not after the kind of day they’ve been through.

“I just wanted to say that I’m sorry,” Michael said sorely.

His voice shook when he spoke.. and even though it was tempting to ask exactly why he was apologizing - she figured it didn’t necessarily matter. At this point it was the effort and the fact he even cared enough to say anything, that made her feel a bit better.

She gave a slight smile, not really wanting to say that any of this was ‘okay’ or that it was ‘fine’ because she was truly tired of lying.. it was something she lost the energy for a while ago.

“Let’s keep going. I think we’re almost there.”

Mallory turned around to keep walking - looking up and realizing that she could finally see something beyond the tree line.. something that looked like vaguely like a skyline of a city.. Was that Los Angeles??

Biting the bullet and choosing to make small talk had its perks - Michael affirmed her suspicion that they were in L.A which was really neither a good or bad thing. She definitely felt more unsettled now that she knew for a fact she was farther away from home than she would like to be.. and also scarily close to Hawthorne, and god knows what else.

It didn’t take long for the two of them to reach the city; and now that she was here.. she really didn’t know what to do next or why she had the odd instinct to walk here in the first place, but thankfully Michael seemed to know.

It was obvious that Mallory didn’t exactly have a plan, in the way that she was starting to physically stall.. her steps slowed, her fingers fidgeted a bit more and picked at her clothes, and her gaze kept falling down to her shoes.. All little, minuscule things but Michael picked up on them all.

He didn’t bother to ask outloud if she knew where she was going. Instead he took the lead.. walking in front of Mallory suddenly and only briefly pausing to turn into a dark alleyway. Something that seemed entirely random but honestly wasn’t. He had a feeling, an urge that they were meant to go this way.. something was waiting for them both.

Michael only looked back to make eye contact for a brief moment; hoping that just for once Mallory would trust him.. but as he looked back into her dark brown eyes which still abnormally almost appeared black - she was still reluctant. He wasn’t necessarily thinking when he reached out to grab her hand. Something he knew that she would hate but he couldn’t help it. Physical touch felt nice, and her hands were soft..

They still were.

He still held onto her hand as he gently pulled and tried to lead her into where he was going - frowning slightly when he felt her grip loosen but he continued to keep walking into the alleyway. He kept going, nearly stumbling on the garbage and various shit that was left on the ground.. but he managed to find a door that was left slightly ajar.. just enough for him and Mallory to slip through.

Michael quietly opened the door further; the room that they suddenly found themselves in was barely lit. A dark, dim, red light was omitted along with several small candles but other than that, the room was kept blanketed in a thick darkness. Both physically and emotionally.

As soon as Mallory entered what she now knew had to be some kind of church.. she felt almost as if she had been punched in the stomach. She noticibly winced, physically withdrawing from Michael and reflexively pulling her hand back even further than she had previously but he wouldn’t let her hand go. Not completely.

The nausea and just the sudden heavy energy she felt made the rest of her body tense up.. and she found herself sort of being thankful that Michael still held onto her and seemed to be leading her to a seat.. but the gratitude she felt only lasted for barely a second. Just until she could actually take a deep breath and focus..

Where exactly were they?

It was clear as day that they happened to be in a church.. but no.

No.

Something was wrong. Something wasn’t right.

This wasn’t a normal church, nothing about this seemed normal in the slightest - the dark red interior and dim lighting, the candles, the late timing of the service and just.. what everyone happened to be wearing seemed horribly wrong.

Just like earlier, and so many times before today she felt herself starting to submit to panic. Her breath quickening and her skin started to grow incredibly hot.. she felt as if she was suffocating from the inside out but she felt foolish for feeling this way as she looked at Michael, as well as everyone else.. they all appeared nonchalant and completely unbothered. Particularly Michael, who didn’t look upset but instead almost caught in a trance listening to the high priestess of the church talk.

Mallory didn’t even notice the woman was talking until she finally bothered to make eye contact. Whom of which walked straight down the isle way that divided the two rows of benches apart; her blonde curls slightly moving as she spoke and moved. She continued to slowly pace up and down, speaking about.. exactly what Mallory had feared.

Fucking exactly what Mallory was trying to avoid.

The immeadite gut reaction to stand up and leave was nearly impossible to resist; and that would be incredibly easy to do given that they were sitting in a otherwise empty back row. But.. instead she didn’t move. She sat still. Barely moving, barely breathing but merely watching and listening.

Now that Mallory actually bothered to listen; she felt completely dumbfounded that Michael was actually buying any of this shit. However, that didn’t make the words that she heard coming from the blonde woman, the leader, any easier to digest. Currently she was boasting and bragging about her sins and how ‘evil’ she was.. or something along those lines. It was still nearly impossible to focus with the feeling that still layed dormant in her gut that refused to leave.

She winced at the words she heard being spoken. Her black nails curling into the soft skin of her palm and gently digging in. Something she consciously chose to do to try to distract herself but it still wasn’t enough. She needed to know that they were atleast sort of safe here.. or that Michael had a vague idea of what he was doing.

“do you know where we are?”

Michael turned to look at Mallory slowly.. looking almost furious - his lips slightly parted as if he silently debated on how to tell her off for interrupting his focus. She waited with baited breath for him to ignore her or to say some snide remark.. only exhaling when he did neither.

“Yeah, don’t worry. We’re in good hands here,” He said. Barely speaking loud enough for Mallory to even hear.

She couldn’t help but to slightly pout, not wanting to argue anymore but not really trusting his judgement yet either. She waited for him to turn his head back to blonde ‘cult’ leader but instead it dropped down her to palm where her nails still cut in.. pressing down until the point where blood was about to be drawn.

Mallory didn’t wince or show any signs of discomfort but Michael still noticed anyway. His gaze quickly flickering down from her palm up to her eyes in pure confusion in what the fuck she was doing..

His hand quickly went to hers without a second thought.

His fingers gently pried hers off of her own hand.. She didn’t try to fight what he was doing but rather looked into his eyes in a questionable manner.. probably wondering why he bothered to touch her again. Something that he truly knew better than to do but couldn’t help from himself from.

“Stop.. Why are you doing that?” Michael asked genuinely. His gaze lingered on her fingertips which now had blood lightly indented on the tips of her nails.

Mallory looked at him awkwardly. Sort of appalled that he even cared enough to notice or to even stop her.. his kindness wasn’t necessarily unwanted but it was something new.. and strange to say the very least.

Mallory wanted to apologize or to just give him a reassuring look but instead she carefully met his gaze and found herself muttering a careful confession, “im sorry I just.. I can’t stand it here. This place-“ her voice broke horribly as she whispered.

She suddenly grew paranoid that the members of this.. ‘congregation’ could hear her sudden disdain for the establishment; which made the feelings of dread and guilt she felt only multiply. She wanted to keep apologizing or to convince Michael to leave but.. that wouldn’t work for the sole reason that she couldn’t even pinpoint exactly why she felt this way. But all she knew is that she had to say something else. Something to make Michael not stare her like how he currently was.

Mallory was still terrified to make eye contact with him. Only bothering to briefly do so to simply affirm that he was actually looking at her - and it wasn’t something she was imagining.

Reality was starting to become something Mallory nearly craved; the day still wasn’t over and yet the fact that some of the earlier events weren’t real.. was something she still needed to process.

The fact that Michael even dared to follow her here, sit next to her, and let alone even give a fuck that she was unintentionally harming herself was beyond her. She wanted to know why, but she knew she still wouldn’t trust his answer if she were to ask. He’d lie.

Mallory spoke again in a tone that was far more quiet than the last, “Where are we?”

Michaels gaze bore into hers.. his face nearly void of any expression as if he was weighing his options on the best response.. calculating and thinking but he stopped the eye contact before he spoke. His eyes went to examine his hands instead which were loosely clasped together over his knees that he slouched tiredly over.

“Somewhere I thought I could feel close to my father.. I know- you don’t want to talk about it-“

“No.. it’s fine,” Mallory reassured hurriedly. Her voice was light and high pitched - happy that Michael was finally managing to communicate and be honest with her. Even if he was inherently right, this wasn’t a topic she wanted to remember or discuss at all but if this was how she got him to open up.. then there was no other option.

“Before you ask.. no. It’s not working. I don’t feel shit here,” he admitted, his voice breaking. “All I feel is just fucking overwhelmed.”

His hands were brought up to his face and Mallory watched him deeply inhale. His finger tips rubbed his temples and fell down the sides of his cheeks - and Mallory didn’t know what to do.

Should she offer him sympathy that.. as bad as it sounded, that she didn’t necessarily really feel? Sure she could relate to him but it wasn’t in the same way in the slightest - and it wasn’t fair to either of them to pretend that it was.

“People here are beyond pathetic.. their sins,” he sneered with something that almost could’ve been considered an chuckle that followed.

Michaels hands fell down to his lap again - suddenly refusing to meet Mallory’s gaze. Perfectly intent on watching whoever the high priestess was, someone that Mallory was more than thankful that she didn’t know the name of.

“Michael.. I can’t stay here-“

He gave Mallory an apologetic look, and for a second she thought he might almost finally agree but to no avail.

“Please. Just ‘till the end,” His face reverted back to the kicked puppy look. The one that finally made her not necessarily forgive him but.. made her realize that at this point he didn’t necessarily deserve to be yelled at.

After all, he wasn’t exactly the same Michael that had planned the death of seven billion people.. not yet.

“Okay,” she quietly agreed.

So they waited until the end of the ‘ceremony’. Or Mallory waited while Michael watched and listened- looking both completely horrified and elated as he did so.. However, Mallory waited and counted each minute that passed.. every one seemingly longer the last.

Even when the blonde woman that was apparently named ‘Hannah’ finally finished talking and most members of the congregation had left; Michael still didn’t budge.

His back, instead of slouching was now pressed up against the bench as he sat.. looking for exhausted and more tired than ever. Tears (or what Mallory suspected were tears anyway) made his cheeks glisten in the dim lighting. She stared at him for a moment - wondering if she should ask if he was okay or if he needed a moment when she felt someone suddenly tug sharply on her clothing.

It was her top, a quick pinch but it was enough to make Mallory’s head turn back immeadietly.

Her resentment toward touch wasn’t just exclusive to Michael, then.

“What is this? Chanel? Loui V? Do I want to know what it took for you to take this?” Hannah spoke in a amused tone.

Hannah stood behind their bench, both equally between Mallory and Michael - like she had the intention of speaking to them both and not one or the other.

“I didn’t take this.. it was a gift,” Mallory answered truthfully and a bit.. bashfully.

She felt insulted that Hannah assumed she would ever steal but then again, with where they were, maybe that wasn’t exactly the insult that Mallory thought it was.

“Yeah.. okay. Like I’m supposed to believe that,” Hannah laughed with a snort.

Mallory was about to retort anyway, but Michael cut her off to her surprise.

“What do you want?” He asked curtly.

His words were cut short. Obviously irritated and put on edge - the fact that he still had tears left on his cheeks explained his behavior plenty.

Hannah immeadietly looked taken aback - disobedience wasn’t something she was used too.

“What do you I want? Do you even know who you’re talking too?” Hannah answered without missing a beat.

Mallory’s eyes darted to Michael. His jaw was clenched, his eyes sharp and focused and his mouth was drawn in a straight line that slightly curved downward.. he looked pissed.

Why was he bothering to argue with Hannah? Someone who he should inherently love or atleast respect with the shared connection of their love for his father.. And over something as trivial as Mallory’s dress? This wasn’t making sense..

“I think I could say the same to you,” Michael answered with a clenched jaw, standing up as his hands started to go to the left side of his face. Inevitably headed for his ‘666’ mark that Mallory heard he was rumored to have.. but certainly wouldn’t have anymore. Not after what she had done.

Michael.. couldn’t. He wouldn’t. This couldn’t happen.

It was clear he was still under the false impression that he had powers, but Mallory wasn’t going to let him find out otherwise this way. Not right now.

“Michael-“! Mallory said urgently.

It worked for a second, just long enough to make him stall.

His hands came to a stand still, pausing as his eyes watched her. Waiting for her to continue but her mouth went entirely dry once she saw Hannah’s hand quickly fly to his shoulders. Screaming words that Mallory didn’t even try to listen too - blood suddenly roaring through her ears louder than any sound that Hannah could make.

Mallory didn’t think when she suddenly felt herself stepping in front of Michael; her feet accidentally stepping onto his as she tried her best to push him back beforehand with her arm but even so - the space in between benches was minimal enough as it was.

Maybe under normal circumstances, Michaels body being pushed up directly behind hers would’ve been distracting but.. Michael was really the last thing she was thinking of now.

Mallory’s hands flew to Hannah’s shoulders - grabbing them (and feeling almost sick with herself how she had done this to Michael not too long ago) with the intention to push her back as hard as she could naturally muster up the strength too. But, of course, that didn’t happen.

Her powers came flooding out unwillingly - the sudden loss of control and ache that was rapidly being released caused her to scream.. something that almost sounded quiet with the contrast of her adrenaline still pumping full force.

Hannahs clothes suddenly sparking a bright orange didn’t cause the immeadite alarm to Mallory that it should’ve; however.. maybe it was due to the fact that the color already blended in with the red atmosphere of the church.. She could only hope.

Hannah’s clothes quickly erupted in flames - the close proximity of the fire made Mallory’s skin quickly grow uncomfortably hot. Forcing her to act on impulse. Selfish impulse.

She stumbled out from the bench and grabbed Michaels wrist clumsily, nearly dragging with him with her as they both stumbling back and away from her.

Mallory’s back was turned to Hannah.. her body shook as she hauntingly realized that the sound had stopped. Hannah wasn’t screaming anymore.. and neither was Mallory.

She couldn’t bring herself to turn around and look, only braving enough strength to look up at Michael who faced the general direction that Hannah was in.. or used to be in. She stared into his eyes and watched the reflection of the fire dance in them - not in wonder but rather pure dread and regret.

Fuck.. what the fuck?

Michaels expression was something she couldn’t really decipher.. the fact he wore a neutral face when she just.. had done something like this wasn’t going to be something she found solace in.

After all; he was still Michael Langdon.

And what she just did.. saying it was stupid wasn’t simply enough.

Forming more complex thoughts was simply impossible, she found herself stumbling away.. going the opposite direction as the room started to spin and melt into a blur of red and black. The ceiling, walls and floor quickly became indistinguishable - her legs were starting to feel weak..

Fuck!

Mallory’s vision flickered to black and her legs gave out from underneath her; but she felt someone’s arms hook underneath hers and pull her up before she could hit the floor.

Her eyes snapped open immeadietly - trying to balance herself back on her feet as quickly as she could so that Michael wouldn’t have to touch her.. still feeling entirely out of it from nearly losing consciousness.

Mallory knew immeadietly it was him without even having to look… and she hated that she was becoming familiar enough with his touch to even recognize that it was him so easily. The tempature of his skin - his palms gripping her upper arms a bit too tightly - was a dead giveaway.

She wanted him off.

Mallory stumbled forward, trying her best to appear nonchalant as she brushed his fingertips off of her arms. Trying not to look bothered by the smell that started to raid the church.. a mix of burnt flesh along with just general fire. She wanted to feel bad but if this really was a satanic temple; it probably had seen worse..

But that wasn’t the point.

Mallory’s gaze searched the walls, wanting to leave but not.. actually leave.

It was too much; she needed time alone. Time to maybe cry or to throw up until she couldn’t breath.. perhaps both, but she still didn’t want Michael to see her vulnerable. Not if she could help it.

Her hands gripped onto the sides of the benches as she passed them; stubbornly intent on walking on to the bathroom which she could now see - selfishly not giving a fuck that she would be leaving Michael but.. she deserved to be selfish for once.

After all, all her choices recently hadn’t been for her own sake.. it was for Cordelias, Madison’s, Zoe’s, The Coven, seven billion people, Michael.. but not her own. Never her own.. none of her choices were really her own lately.

Mallory tried her best to ignore the sound of footsteps following her. Pushing the door of the women’s bathroom open quickly but stopping once she heard Michael whine.

God, why was he always fucking whining?

“What the fuck was that?” He nearly hissed. His tone had no malicious intent but it still set Mallory on edge.

He looked alarmed, bewildered. Blue eyes widened and his lips slightly parted, his teeth clenched.

“What part?” She asked cynically with a dry laugh.

She met Michaels gaze for a second before fully slipping inside the bathroom - hoping Michael would get the memo to leave her alone but she paused once she didn’t hear the door shut behind her..

“Michael-“

“I know you don’t like talking to me but I’m asking you, just once. What the fuck just happened?? Did you-?” His voice quivered, breaking softly as he spoke.

Mallory was in tears, the thought and realization alone of what she did finally sinking in.

“No. No.. I-I didn’t.. that wasn’t me, okay? I would.. would never..” She spoke as a confirmation to both Michael and herself.

Her back was still turned to Michael - thankful that he couldn’t see how fucking close she was to full on sobbing.. her vision blurred by all of the tears that had gathered in her eyes that wouldn’t spill. Her throat clenched, growing tight and forcing her to stop breathing - but there was no way she was going to let herself cry in front of Michael out of all people.

Showing weakness, even now.. even when it was proven he was no longer a threat to her, was never something she would let herself do. She wouldn’t let herself become that stupid.

Pain centered itself in her chest, but the grief she felt, rapidly spread throughout her body. Consuming her until she felt herself succumbing to the feeling.

Fuck.

Mallory wanted to push past Michael and run out the door.

Mallory wanted to scream at him and tell him to get the fuck out of the women’s restroom.

It was so easy to blame him for everything she felt - but she knew better than that now. Even though it was easy; it wasn’t the right thing to do.. and it’s not really like she was used to take the easy route to things, anyway.

She didn’t exactly welcome the feeling but she gave up trying to fight it.. letting the first tear run down her cheek. She still tried her best to stifle her sobs, her throat still clenching almost painfully.. not really giving a fuck about showing weakness in this moment but more so just.. embarrassed.

Michael stared at her almost blankly - wanting to say something but he couldn’t help but to feel stuck.

He wanted to feel bad, and he did.. she was clearly hurt but he didn’t understand exactly how.. Did she feel remorse for what she did? Did she think that Hannah or whatever the fuck her name was, didn’t deserve it?

Sure he didn’t exactly know her intentions but it wasn’t anything pure.. and Mallory needed to know that.

He approached her carefully, knowing damn well that she had the capability to do the same that she had done to Hannah.. or to perhaps throw him up against the wall without even so much as laying a hand on him, but he wasn’t scared.

Mallory wasn’t intimidating.. she wouldn’t hurt him.

Her head was tilted up and her eyes watched the ceiling - avoiding eye contact. She slowly moved to the wall, leaning against it begrudgingly but still avoiding Michaels gaze. Patches of dirt and bruises decorated her arms along with some blood stains and a couple of nasty cuts. Her black dress looked like nothing special anymore. It was torn in some parts but - Michael wanted to laugh that he was critiquing her appearance in the slightest as if he had any room to talk.

He watched her carefully and curiously as he decided to stand next to her and mirror how she was standing until they were nearly shoulder to shoulder. Mallorys eyes which were previously closed suddenly opened. Darkly peering over at him and their sudden proximity, something Michael wasn’t going to apologize for this time.

“I still don’t understand you, or why you did what you did but it was completely unnecessary,” Michael said.

He felt flattered that Mallory was fond of him enough to apparently kill for him but - this wasn’t adding up. And plus, Michael still had his powers (or atleast to the best of his knowledge he did) so it’s not as if he was completely defenseless. He felt almost insulted that Mallory would assume that he needed to be protected. He wasn’t a child.

But didn’t she hate him? She could still barely make eye contact with him and resented every time they touched - something which hurt Michael a bit more than he would like to admit.. No one (except for his family, of course) had ever reacted to him like that before.. most people, espically women, practically died for his touch.

Mallory was different.

That was one thing he was certain of. Every move she made, every word that came out of her mouth was never something he could predict.. and to think he once hated unpredictability.. but he didn’t trust her. Not for one second.

“It wasn’t a choice. I-I just.. it just happened and I don’t want to talk about it,” Mallory answered sheepishly.

Michael wanted to argue but instead he merely nodded.

“That’s fine.”

Mallory looked at him almost apologetically after she heard the tone of his words; which were a bit too harsh and forced in nature.

“So.. did it work? What you came here for.. to feel closer to him-“ She asked out of sheer curiosity.

“My father?”

“Yes.”

Michael swallowed and broke eye contact. “No. I still don’t feel a fucking thing.. Do you?”

Mallory’s eyes narrowed and she shifted her weight back onto her feet, ceasing from leaning on the wall. “What?”

“My father sent you to me, so I figured naturally you would have some kind of connection with him.. you do, don’t you?”

Sneaky bastard. Mallory knew this conversation was for the sole purpose of him finding out more information about her; perhaps to better manipulate? She didn’t exactly know.

“I don’t know. That’s something I still have to figure out,” she admitted truthfully.

“Together?”

Mallory nodded.

“Yeah. I won’t leave you,” she said. Her tone a bit softer than she would have liked.

Mallorys lips started to upturn in something that was reminiscent of a smile - their eyes lingered on each other for only a second but it didn’t last.

The door suddenly was pushed open; both Mallory and Michael snapped their heads up. The sudden intrusion gaining both of their full undivided attention - fear both running abundant in their veins.

The first thing Mallory noticed was the loud clicking of high heels against the tile floor of the bathroom.. something she was sure meant nothing to Michael but.. Mallory knew better.

This wasn’t a coincidence. After the day she had - nothing was a damn coincidence anymore.

The first thing she noticed was long blonde hair.. a black, tight fitting dress along with black high heels.

It was too familiar.. she knew all too well exactly who this fucking was.

Another witch.. her sister.. someone she was far too accustomed too but also.. no.

No.

Sure the woman who just entered the bathroom was Madison Montgomery but it wasn’t her Madison. After all, why the fuck was Madison at a satanic temple?

Taglist: @michaellangdonstanaccount @langdonsexual @jimmason @blakescoven @dark-mei-rose @9layerdevilfoodcake @prophecy-is-inevitable @matildaofoz @beautyiswithinchaos @frenchlangdon @instinctsxbaby @melodylangdon @littledemondani @celestialrequiem @sojournmichael @ritualmichael @twilightzone24

Let me know if u would like to be added or removed to the taglist <3

[raekahnsfw]

What if I’m not good enough for you?

Pairing: Shindo Yo x Reader Rating: Explicit (LIKE BE WARNED!), NS*W Warning: Smut, Drunk Sex, Slightly Dubious Consent, Aged-up Characters, Pining, Angst, Insecurities, Slow-burn fluff Word Count: 10,699  A/N: These BNHA characters are 18+ and are nearly graduating seniors.

Summary: You’re a senior at UA with a long-standing crush on Shindo Yo but you’ve sworn never to be in a relationship again. Your last one destroyed you with insecurities so you’ve decided the only path is to be a lonely pro-hero. But with the opportunity for a one-night drunken stand with Shindo, you take the chance and expect to be forgotten. Shindo won’t stand for it.

From Me: (Follow me at @raekahwritings​) This is my first fic ever into the BNHA fandom and for one of my favorite heroes, Shindo Yo! I want to give a huge shout out to @thewheezingwyvern because she helped to beta-read this monster of a fic. Basically, this is the first I’ve written in a near decade and with her advice, it became something I was too embarrassed to share to something I’m really proud of. Here we go for Shindou Club and BNHA Book Club, Provisional License.

Also, inspirations for this work is from @katsukisprincess, @lady-bakuhoe, @iwvs-on-ao3, @bnhabookclub, @/lemonlordleah-shinzawa, @/marilla-eldriana, and others because I’m too embarrassed to tag them when they’re so amazing.

There was always a question in the back of your mind; was love worth sacrificing your pro-hero dream? 

“Hey Mina.” You watched your pink haired friend scroll through Tinder on the dorm room couch.  You all were seniors in UA academy and studying for finals. Or supposed to be anyways. You slumped over on the table, smushing your cheek on the cold, hard plastic as you took a brief reprieve from your textbook.

“Would you rather be somebody’s girlfriend or a hero?” Mina turned around and lit up at your question. 

“Depends. How hot is my boyfriend?” She waggled her eyebrows at you and started listing off a number of heroes that would ‘totally rock her world,’ cackling loudly how she’d totally give up everything for some mad sex. Soon enough, she flopped back over the couch and was engrossed in another possible hook-up.  

Maybe you should’ve asked Momo. But she didn’t seem very experienced in relationships and you were currently in a dilemma. You, Y/N, an aspiring hero had sworn off relationships because your freshman ex-boyfriend had thrown you an ultimatum: “Why do you need to be a hero when you’re already my girlfriend?”  

You had broken up with his sorry ass right there and then. Nothing would get in the way of being a hero. Apparently, Mina would joke otherwise. 

“....I don’t think sex is everything, Mina.” Mina started whining petulantly, lamenting over the lack of hotties on her dating apps. You laughed it off while she tapped her phone in frustration. Mina would forever be Mina. 

“Y/N, do you think he’s hot or am I just too thirsty right now?” She was soon waving her phone to you with somebody’s profile picture, some asshole who was obnoxiously showing their abs off. You rolled your eyes before making a ‘nixed’ gesture. 

“Mina, you are way too good for jerks who think showing off their naked body parts is gonna score chicks.” You scoffed at seeing their disgustingly lewd caption. Mina moved on to the next one, muttering. 

“Jeez, Y/N, what is your type even? I’ve never seen you hook up or with a boyfriend before?” She tried valiantly to quiz you and show you more pictures but you ignored her in favor of going back to studying.

Honestly, you had a type. But if Mina or anyone knew, it’d probably be too surprising for them to fathom; you were the serious girl who always said you didn’t need a boyfriend. You prosaically told people, ‘learning to be a hero is way awesomer’. But if there was one shocking thing you could say about yourself….

It would be that you were a fucking idiot to fall in love with Shindou Yo. Somehow, your heart had chosen the most devious asshole you ever could’ve ever met.

Shindo Yo didn’t even go to UA Academy. He was a mutual friend of the UA’s Midoriya, Todoroki and Bakugo. Actually…. you weren’t sure if they were even friends… With the way Bakugo seemed to fight with him, it seemed more like they were mortal enemies. Nevertheless, it seemed like he was showing up more often to outside gatherings and to parties that you and your UA classmates frequented. It was a relief that Mina hadn’t figured it out since she was surprisingly perceptive. 

“Hey Mina. I’m gonna go to the library to meet up with Kirishima.” You kept an eye on the time and started packing up your bag. You had made plans to exchange study notes for a drink. She nodded, already distracted with her next conquest. You sighed. 

Jeez, you shouldn’t have asked Mina. She hadn’t caught on though… because if anyone had ever found out about your silly crush, you wonder what they would say. Shindo was universally seen as a jerk at UA. There was every reason to avoid him instead of falling in love with him. Shindo Yo was self-assured and manipulative. Bakugo had called him out on his shit early on in the UA Provisional Exams. You had personally seen Shindo turn on the charm to your fellow UA students, only to decimate his nice-guy exterior to turn the tables on your unwitting classmates and team. You had first-hand faced his cunningness in action. Did you have every reason to mistrust him? Yes.

But on the flip side, you also saw how loyally compassionate he was to his fellow teammates. You saw how he pulled through at the eleventh hour to get him and his teammates to success. He never hesitated to use his sinister two-faced nature to protect his friends at Ketsubutsu Academy High School.

One situation, in particular, was on your mind…

Shindo had shown up at the karaoke club with Tatami and Camie in tow, ‘inviting’ himself to a casual graduation party for Mirio, Nejire and Tatami. Everyone thought it had been reserved for UA students but someone had let it slip to other schools…. (It was Mirio. His nice-ness was over the bounds. Throwing out invites left and right like a loveable idiot.)

Shindo had somehow weaseled himself into the roster of singing anarchy – grabbing a mic and belting a love song to Uraraka with a significant wink to Midoriya. He even got Jiro and Tatami together on a song. He had challenged Bakugo to a song (which didn’t happen) but a girl could dream about that blackmail material.

But one of the beginning moments that you had fallen in love…

He had been sitting around, mulling over a drink when you saw him look discreetly around for Tatami and Cami. They had both been gone for a tad too long….? Shindo took a break on the pretense of Bakugo’s death glare being too much and laughing his way out of the room. You sat near the door, so you had a surprisingly good view of when his eyes narrowed, and he dropped his friendly demeanor on his way out. You turned your head inquisitively…? Shindo’s sights were set on a couple of low-life frat boys who were heading for an unsuspecting Camie and Tatami leaving the bathroom. You watched him walking towards them, heading them off, and shoving them into another hallway.

You followed him out and stayed behind the hallway to try to see what was happening. What could you say, curiosity got the better of you?

You couldn’t make out what he said but the low threatening timbre of his voice had sent cold chills down your spine. You had never heard this level of sinister maliciousness from even Bakugo. This Shindo was probably more of a villain that he had let others believe. The culprit’s voices became heated, but it was abruptly stopped by the vicious slamming of the wall. Then you could hear running.

You backed up into an empty room, afraid to show Shindo that you had been waiting there. He rounded back—thankfully not seeing you—and you could see the genuine and sincere relief at seeing both Tatami and Camie laughing… in ignorance of what they had just avoided. He rounded the two to join the karaoke room, keeping a watchful eye on the other unsavory participants…

You had leaned against the dark and empty room’s wall to calm your beating heart. Shindo was undoubtedly an asshole but you knew how fiercely protective of the people he loved.

Maybe that was the spark that ignited this wistful thought – “I wish someone loved me that much.”

But love paled in comparison to upcoming finals. Obviously. Get your act together. You made it to the library and waved to several of your classmates studying nearby. Everyone turned back to their own work and left you alone. Just as well. You drummed your fingers on the library desk as you flipped open your computer and continued typing a study guide.

During times like this, your mind wandered a bit. After the karaoke incident, you found yourself looking for moments with Shindo—hoping to catch a glimpse beneath that nice-guy exterior. You found yourself wondering if he was going to ‘show up’ to parties. You found yourself floating over to conversations with the Ketsubutsu crowd if they were ‘mysteriously’ invited. You wondered what Shindo treated his girlfriend like—probably Tatami—but there was no confirmation they were dating.

In your dorms, you sometimes found yourself chuckling along with Todoroki or laughing at Bakugo and wondered what Shindo might say if he was there.

Maybe you yearned to come back to your dorm room and see someone waiting to greet you with a sarcastic quip and sugared, cunning words. Maybe you had stuffed your fingers in between your legs in a pitiful attempt to dampen the rising heat… especially when you thought of a certain brunette and his dark timbre of a voice in the depths of the night.

Maybe you could lie to yourself and say, Shindo was not that person you imagined. 

But you were an independent person who would never allow yourself to be weak or dependent on anyone. If you ever confessed, you would be trapped in a relationship where your partner would inevitably resent you for putting your career first. These were the thoughts that plagued you in your hidden moments. You tried to push these insecurities away but they lurked nearby.

Resentment. That was quite familiar to you. That’s inevitably what you heard and felt. Your last boyfriend resented he was never a priority over yourself, your hero aspirations, and the success of your friends and classmates. You had resented his feelings, trapping you and confining you to change who you were.

So yes, you were independent, amazing, and awesome. But you were lonely... A realization that would sneak up on you every so often. You looked at your computer screen, lifting a hand to crawl over the painful feelings in your chest… as if to reassure yourself.

Because who would want someone like this? How selfish would it be to confess to someone and expect them to understand this?

So yes, you had decided love would never be in the cards for you. It was a practical and logical decision.

“Hey Y/N, you look lost in thought over here.” Kirishima came over to your study table in the library, holding two drinks. You waved off his concerns and lit up at seeing what was in his hands.

“No, no, I’m not! Gimmie the goods.” You tapped the desk impatiently for him to put the hot chocolate down. Kirishima looked at your childish drink in bemusement as he put down his black coffee. “I promised to give over these study notes for you so the least you can do is not judge my drinks.” You stuck your tongue out at the red-haired boy.

Kirishima chuckled, dropping his backpack noisily on the floor. “Y/N, I’m supposed to join Bakugo soon for warm-up... How long do you think you’ll be?” You rolled your eyes a bit at hearing that. When wasn’t Bakugo training or something? Whatever, you were doing Kirishima a favor after all.

You absentmindedly decided to ask, “Isn’t Bakugo supposed to have a match or something? Is it against UA’s Class B or…?” You tapped your backspace key rather impatiently. Aizawa-sensei had been organizing more hero trainings lately for individual members. Something alongside hero work studies; that was certainly keeping you busy. It seemed everyone had something going on lately. You lifted your cup for a quick sip.

“Actually...” Kirishima scratched the back of his head nervously. “It’s against Ketsubutsu Academy’s students.”

You nearly spewed out your precious hot cocoa. Your arms flew up to wipe your keyboard in an awkward attempt to muffle your surprise.

Kirishima had an inkling of your crush for the earthquake bastard. But you were always so quick to dismiss any remote implication that he wasn’t quite sure…. But if he didn’t know before, he knew now.

“…. Apparently Joke-sensei kept pushing Aizawa-sensei for a collaborative ‘event’ so this is what they came up with. It’s supposed to be the beginning of a ‘school-wide’ effort for cooperation and teamwork for heroes across different areas. It’s still in the works but…” Kirishima trailed off at seeing your pinched face.

“What time is it?” You curtly asked. Kirishima looked at his watch.

“It’s supposed to start in an hour.”

“Goddamnit Kirishima. I’m sending you your stupid notes so we can get to this match.” You didn’t even realize you had dropped your formalities. What was racing through your mind was that you had less than an hour to get back your dorm, get ready, see Shindo without looking like a complete nerd who spent too much time studying.

You had luckily been on the ending revisions, but it wasn’t like Kirishima needed all of it. You hastily typed his email in, cursing when your computer loaded too slowly, and sent off the file.

Then came shoving Kirishima into the directions of the dorms so he could “hurry the fuck up”. Kirishima may have dragged his feet a bit, snickering at Bakugo’s choice words falling from your mouth.  It wasn’t like he had to do anything for the match anyways. You on the other hand….

You couldn’t salvage much of your looks, so you tried to throw on a large oversized sweater over your skirt and put on a touch of eyeliner and mascara. Sheesh, you didn’t want to look like you tried too hard. You looked critically at yourself in the mirror and saw… nothing special. You deflated a bit.  Well. Fake it until you make it. Even when you tried, it didn’t seem like much had changed. So what if you didn’t look as pretty as the others like Momo? You had slowly built up your shattered self-confidence before. Better this than looking like a cakeface or a tramp, you supposed.

Then Momo and Jirou knocked on your door. “Y/N, you ready yet?” You opened the door and shoved the feeling of inadequacy in the back of your mind.

“Yea!” You followed the UA crowd out of the dorms and you could see Midoriya and Ochaco talking excitedly about the match—it seemed you weren’t the only one surprised by this. Midoriya was vividly recounting Shindo’s quirks and the pros and cons against Bakugo….

When you went over to the gym where the match was being held, your group joined with the other classmates already there. It looked like Kaminari had saved a row for everyone, patting the seat next to him for Jirou. Mina waved to you, grinning like a banshee and wildly flailing for the seat next to her.

“Y/N, I saved the best seat for you!” She slyly gestured to the view…. that was angled towards Bakugo’s back and… Shindo’s front muscular chest. Did she know? Your heart leaped. Then Mina pointed towards the Ketsubusu’s Academy’s growing crowd. “This is our chance to see the hotties from other schools! I mean we got some fine men but a girl’s gotta window-shop!”

“Hmmm….” You watched interestedly now—you had only ever seen Tatami. But it seemed a fair number of girls had gathered and were pointing at… Shindo? You saw him gesture with his ‘aw shucks’ routine, bashfully giving a smile to the girls before the match. You recognized that look from the UA Provisionals, it reeked of blatant insincerity. You guess fangirls really were blind in love and adoration? They would be in for some cruel reality…. Meanwhile, people were avoiding Bakugo since he had his threatening face on. He was flipping people off and giving no attention to any of the bystanders around him. He just wanted to beat the earthquake bastard.

“Yo, Bakugo, you might wanna look a little less murdersome!” You shouted in good fun from your seat. Bakugo flipped you off while Kirishima and Mina snickered at Bakugo’s salty expression.  Really, you admired Bakugo’s hero ethic, nothing was gonna stop him from getting to the top. But Shindo…? That was a different story. Eh, you couldn’t ponder it anymore since Aizawa sensei had shown up (with a sour look at all the audience) before commencing the match.

You were on the edge of your seat for the next 30 minutes as Bakugo and Shindo traded blow after blow; Shindo had a weakness since Bakugo was airborne due to his thrusters. But Shindo would drag Bakugo down and engage in hand to hand combat. Your legs were creeping closer and closer together at seeing those broad shoulders, rivulets of sweat down his neck and temple, and his determined expression. How would it look if it was faced at you? Focus on the match, not Shindo’s muscles. Focus, Focus. Eventually it came down to the timer and Bakugo had landed a higher number of blows.          

At Shindo’s loss, you felt a keen sense of disappointment. Some part of you cheered for Bakugo but you were desperately craning your neck to see Shindo’s reaction. His face remained darkened though as he turned around and went to his growing number of fangirls who cooed over him. With that many girls, why would he ever take a second look at you? They would cling onto him and stroke his overbearing ego—unlike you. You didn’t even have the courage to attempt to flirt with him. So what? You were blissfully single; you weren’t looking for anything with him.... Right?  

“… Y/N!” You were jolted away from staring, and secretly fantasizing, at Shindo. “Come on, let’s head out!” Kirishima put an arm around your shoulders and Mina was tugging at your sleeve in post-match excitement.

“Yeah! What are we doing now?” You pushed your hair back over your ear, the locks falling in every which direction. Slowing just a step back, you took one last look over your shoulder…  You mentally took a picture of those sinewy muscles, pledging to engrave it forever for those dark moments in your lonesome room. You had a great pro-hero path ahead of you, great friends, great family…

But fuck.

You definitely did not see Shindo looking at your retreating form with a smirk on his face.

 ----------------------------------------------------------

Repeat that fuck. Because you were in another karaoke room with this raucous UA and Ketsubetsu crowd mere hours later. It turned out that everyone wanted to celebrate the match by getting stupidly, wildly drunk. Drinks were smuggled in—god, you knew Aizawa was probably looking the other way—gotta let students be students.

People were chugging alcohol and dancing on tables. This was probably the most normal ‘school’ experience you could’ve had… Even ‘hero’ schools needed to let loose sometime. But you honestly didn’t do very well in this scene. You were content to nurse your drink while leaning against a quiet corner.

God, even Bakugo and Midoriya were drunk— Bakugo had been egged on while Midoriya probably didn’t even realize he took some spiked punch. He was a new level of naïve and that adorable boy had turned beet red. You just face palmed at seeing his embarrassing antics.

“Y/N!” Camie came bouncing over to you, palpable relief on her face. “You’re the only sober looking one here! Can you watch this idiot for a second? Maybe get him to drink some water?” She brought on over… Shindo?! “He’s becoming deadweight and he is ruining my chances tonight! He is the worst wingman ever to get so drunk after losing!” She dropped the deadweight—Shindo— onto the floor next to you with his legs sprawled open.

“I swear to god, he isn’t going to remember anything tomorrow! This incorrigible jerk is going to be black-out drunk like always….” Camie’s voice trailed off and got a little bit... higher? She looked away nervously, but you could see her gaze fall on … Ojiro? She said wingman... Oh no, she was trying to get together with him! You blushed for her!

“Camie, I got this. I’ll make sure he gets some water!” You tried to give her an encouraging look. Oh god, you were so bad at flirting and set ups! You could see how awkward this was for the both of you! But you would try your hardest to help her.

She bounced away while you…. Bent down… Oh gods you had never been this close to him before. You put your palm to his forehead, trying to feel how hot he was. Damn, he ran like a furnace. Shindo merely lolled his head to the side, sighing when your cool fingers made contact.

“Fuck, that feels nice.” Your hand shot back at hearing him talk. You didn’t think he was awake…

“I’m just trying to make sure you’re okay. Do you want some water?” You were careful to keep your voice low, awkwardly putting your hand on his clothed shoulder.

“I’m thirsty.” His voice dropped low and you felt a twinge between your thighs at the cool gravel of it. “But I’m thirsty for something else…” He let the comment sit between you two…. But your inquisitive eyes flew between him and the punch.

“Honey... don’t look away.” His hot hands wrapped around your neck to crane your face towards his. “I want something wet, something that tastes like you.” You stood shock still, trying to see if you had misheard him…? Was he flirting with you?! Shindo gave a seductive grin as his other hand snaked up your bare thighs.

“Shindo!” You couldn’t hold back your squeak of surprise, feeling him so close to your panties. You tried to look down but he kept you locked in place.

“Come on baby, don’t you want to console little ‘ol me?” His voice was doing things to you— you could feel your legs grinding closer together, trapping his inquisitively still fingers between your thighs. “Baby, you’re so warm and wet for me already?”  He started rubbing his fingers lightly over your panties, feeling the damp spot that had built up from his earlier match.

“Wait—“ You tried to curl in, reach for his hand to stop him but he pushed aside your panties to slip a finger, rubbing it up and down your slit. A single lone digit had you stopping any protests, feeling it fucking vibrate. You leaned in closer, gasping, and he gave a satisfied smirk. His other cupped your butt in delectable promise.

“I can make a mess of you if were a little less of a public place…. Unless you’re into that, baby.”

Public place. Oh god. You straightened out, remembering you were in the dark karaoke room with people everywhere! He was fingering you where everyone could see! “Please, you’re not thinking straight.” You tried to say but stuttering as he pulled his digit away and licked it obscenely.

“Baby girl, don’t you want to be a good girl for me?” Shit, shit, shit. Baby girl. You moved before you could think, crushing your lips to his. He moved as if he knew what his sultry words would invoke, immediately balling his hands into your messy hair, plunging, ravaging, owning you.

“Wanna get out of here?” You nodded helplessly. He quickly hauled you up and left the raucous karaoke room with you by his side.

Fuck it, he wasn’t going to remember anything after tonight. What harm was it if you grabbed this one night with him?

You were inexperienced with sex, probably bad at it, but you didn’t care. It wasn’t like he would remember right?

So, repeat that fuck. No one would’ve ever expected you to be in the bathroom, sitting on Shindo’s lap and spreading your legs lewdly open for him. Your panties had long been discarded as you rutted desperately against Shindo Yo’s hand. “Please, Shindo…” Shindo squirmed a thumb into your asshole, teasing the puckered hole and was thrusting fingers in your cunt. You wanted something more…. Something bigger.

“Fuck…” Shindo watched at how wet you got for him, the sound of his fingers moving in and out and squelching lewdly. “Can you feel that?” You made a dissatisfied noise until his fingers went deeper into your cunt. “Bitch, you’re not satisfied. You need it deeper?” You made a keen whining noise, wiggling your hips. He shoved another digit in, now thrusting three of his digits deeper in while vibrating it and feeling the delicious squeeze of your cunt around him.

“I guess alcohol makes you numb huh? But the fun things I can do to you…” He breathed the words into your neck, giving a salacious grin at your wanton, deprived state.  Shit, vibration hero wasn’t just a title. He relished watching as your hips jerked forward, your boobs shoved lasciviously into his face in desperate need.

“God, you’re so buttoned up and serious most of the time. But here and now? Are you so hungry for me that you wanted to jump me in the bathroom?” Shindo’s fingers withdrew to your dismay. You whined as he gripped your cheeks painfully, smirking at your needy expression. “Honey, you gotta tell me what you want? Don’t just expect me to do all the work here.”

This was your only chance with him. Come tomorrow, he wouldn’t remember a thing and you could hold this memory in the darkest corner of your heart. Just one good long fuck and he would get back to his life and yours without anyone being the wiser. “Shindo, please...”

“Do you want me to finger you until you cum?” Shindo could get you off here and now—but you shook your head wildly and gave him a pleading look. Your cunt was throbbing for him and you wanted to feel his cock in you.

You laced your hands into Shindo’s hair and forced the brunette to look at your lust-hazed eyes, pitching your own voice low…  “Please fuck me, Shindo. Just stop teasing me, use me like I’m your fuck toy.” Shindo groaned low as he lowered his hands to your thighs and squeezed painfully at the plump flesh there.

“Babe, you’re such a dirty girl.” He hauled you up, shoving his pants down low with his cock jutting out. He couldn’t even be bothered to take his jeans off, but this sordid detail made the encounter more real to you. You looked down at his engorged length, heavy and hot against your cunt. God, even his dick was deliciously huge. Wasn’t just ego then.

 “Tell me, are you the type of slut who just wants a dick when you get drunk?” You took a deep breath; ignoring your rational thoughts that this was a stupid way to tell him and decided to just confess…

“Just you Shindo. Please… I’ve been wanting this for years. Please, please….” With that, Shindo groaned as he forced his cockhead into your abused cunt. He eased in... making you think Shindo was more gentle that he let on? Right up until he shoved you down onto his cock, grinning at the sharp jerk of your body and the scream that tore itself out of your throat. Shindo thought to himself: You wanted him to use you like his toy, so that’s what you would get.

You had heard Shindo fucked well. That didn’t begin to describe it—your pussy clenched against his cock at the rough treatment, the burning stretch turning you on with its delicious bite of pain. He thrusted with a piston movement, faster than you’d ever been fucked. When he started vibrating again? You felt your orgasm crash upon you. Your own nails raked against his back as he continued thrusting through your climax, biting down on your neck as he came inside you.

You both sat there for a second… breathing too hard to say anything. You had never had an orgasm that good before—and you honestly didn’t know if Shindo thought this was just a good fuck or shitty sex. Coming down from the high…. You had time to think. Which made you feel wildly inadequate—was this the part where you said something? Like, ‘thanks for the sex, I’m out?’

Was it too dumb to ask if he liked it? Was it even dumber to think maybe he had heard that you confess?

“Um…” You moved your leg and winced at feeling the seeping wetness crawl out between you two. “Shindo..?”

He was surprisingly quiet. His usual smug expression was hidden as he slumped into your shoulder. You eased away from him… but felt his hands tighten on your thighs as if to keep you there. Now you were very unsure of what to say.

“Shindo…. Let me look at you.” You wrapped your arms around his neck, playing with the dark locks as you tried to lift the heavy weight of his head to see his expression…? Was this something more to him too? “Please, let me know if you’re okay...”

“SHINDO! HONEY BUNS! LOVE OF MY LIFE!”

But then you were crushed with an overwhelming sense of guilt as you heard Tatami’s lilting voice calling for Shindo. The very same name but her cheerful bright voice was laced with concern—

“Fuck.” That what his first words after his sexual interlude with you was. From his forceful, angry gaze at the door… Oh god, were you his sordid secret? Your heart sank. He was drunk, he would probably black-out, did he even realize who he was with? Did he think he was fucking Tatami? Is that what this was?

“Shindo, let me go.” You crawled off his lap, forcing the hot and wet threat of tears down and keeping your voice steady. Shindo looked at you in panic—he couldn’t even bother to look at you earlier, but he would for Tatami? You didn’t even warrant your own, thank you, fuck you. “I guess it’s time to run huh?” You pulled your hair back, pulled your shirt to a modest length, as Tatami’s voice got closer.

Shindo shoved his pants more fully on, “Hey—this isn’t what you think this is. Let me explain.”

“Really?” You whirled around and threw him the most venomous glare you could muster—“Do you even know my name? Or am I just a fucking nameless bitch you mistook for Tatami? Because she is right there,” You jerked a thumb to the door and bit your lip, “She’s perfect and so amazing—” and you remembered Camie…. She trusted you. You had taken advantage of this. “And you’re fucking drunk so I’m literally the shittiest person ever. God, please forget this ever happened.”

Shindo was starting to look irritated at your non-stop words and made a move to speak but you slapped your hand on his mouth. Why else would she be looking for him? “Shindo, don’t explain anything to me. Just make things right by her and don’t ruin this because of this. You guys would be amazing together and she doesn’t deserve to know I fucked it up for you.”

You shoved him back into the bathroom as you exited, rather abruptly as Tatami turned to the wrong hallway. This would be perfect because it would give Shindo some time and you could escape— you could hear Shindo fumbling with the door, but you ran before he could catch you. Turned out your UA skills made you slightly faster than him.

You shoved your way to the exit, screw your purse, you could text Kirishima to take it home for you. You hailed the first taxi out the door to get you home as quickly as possible. It wasn’t until the car sped away that you took your first real breath… and sobbed.

“God, I’m so stupid to think he would ever look twice at me.”

You curled your hands around your cold arms, arms that had just been around Shindo… Was it too much to ask for a single night?

Was it too much to be in love?

--------------------------------------------------------------

 “Y/N!” You had stayed in your room for the week, only crawling out to the third-year common rooms on Friday. You had gone home that night and laid on your bed, sobbing into the sweater that had briefly held Shindo’s scent. Maybe you were masochistic or something; holding onto something that was so painful to you. But the faint earthy smell, musk, and cedar was hard to let go.

“Yes?” You tried to smile. Midoriya came bounding up to you with a worried look. “You went home so suddenly the other night! You disappeared and never came back!”

“What, you get sick? You look like shit.” Bakugo snickered. Sero slapped him with one of the pillows and you could hear his frantic whispered conversation, you don’t tell a girl she looks horrible. The other girls were around, and Mina was creeping up on Sero, Kirishima and the others to get closer to you.

“Um… Yea.” You tried to laugh it off. But Midoriya still looked worried as he took in your slightly puffy eyes. It seemed like he could see through your flimsy excuse.

Thankfully, Mina interrupted you both with a mischievous grin. “Y/N, you had people asking after you after karaoke!” She had a sing-song tone, waggling her eyebrows. But your heart sunk further… Had it been Tatami? Camie? Had she found out? Because coming from Mina, this could be anyone.

“…Who was it?” If it was, you would face up to it. Because you were Y/N, and you didn’t run from your problems and you’d apologize to her.

“Actually…. It was Shindo.” Mina squealed and made kissy-kissy motions at you.

“Guys, shut up. It would never happen—” Bakugo scoffed and gestured toward you. “She wouldn’t date Mister Two-Faced, no one here is stupid enough to do that.” You felt defensive at hearing that about him, even if he is the source of your misery right now. 

“Bakugo, just because I wouldn’t date him doesn’t means he’s not a good hero. I’m just….” You trailed off, trying to come up with an excuse. But maybe your emotions were too raw, you found your bravado lacking as your voice became small. “… not good enough.”

Anything further was cut off as Bakugo suddenly lurched up, staring daggers at you. Even Midoriya had gone quiet, his brows furrowed. What had you done wrong?

“I don’t think saying that is reason for both of you to be so mad at me. What did I even do?” You wouldn’t stand there and take Bakugo’s shit. You weren’t good enough for Shindo but you were good enough to take on any of your friends in a fight. “Guys, why are you so mad at me?”

Kirishima’s mouth may have been open, he swears he wasn’t but you saw him rapidly point to... you? Behind? Whatever. His eyes were blown wide and he was trying to be subtle as fuck but you weren’t having it. You were trying to get over heartbreak, you came to see your friends and this was what you got?

“I swear to god, I will kick your ass, in training, Bakugo if you don’t look me in the eyes and talk to me like I am a human being and not like I grew another fucking head—”

You heard someone clear their throat, maybe even hold back a scoff and that voice was oh-so-familiar. Like someone you recently heard moaning. Someone that you… kindly shut your mouth and swiveled around with the fakest smile plastered on your feature. How did I miss Kirishima’s cue?

Shindo Yo was in your apartment complex. In your dorm common room. In front of you. Probably had been behind you and overheard what you said. To your dismay, he wasn’t uglier, but he was even more handsome in your two-day respite and everlasting embarrassment that could swallow you whole right now. Please let me die.

“Hey fuckface, you’re in the wrong school.” Bakugo was snarling at him as Shindo waved to the room.

“Hey blastie, it’s nice to see you too.” He gave a saccharine sweet smile to Bakugo, fully knowing how easily riled he was. Bakugo scowled at the name, ready to call him out.

Shindo smirked at Bakugo but otherwise held his hands up placatingly. “Don’t jump down my throat, I’m not here to pick a fight or spy on you all. You UA students are so jumpy.” Kaminari and Bakugo didn’t look believing but Midoriya finally smiled and gave him a friendly wave.

“What brings you here Shindo? And calm down Bakugo, he’s probably authorized to come inside. UA doesn’t let people just walk in.” Shindo nodded and held up… your bag and phone. No wonder Kirishima said he couldn’t find it! You had tried to ping it on your laptop, but it had been a mess without it and to text the others.

“I’m just here to return Y/N’s stuff and hopefully have a conversation with her.” He cocked his head to the side, glancing at you. He had his own (fake) smile on, giving a puppy dog look to the girls as they started fussing over you two.

“Of course Y/N would be grateful to talk to you!” You would? You looked back at Yaoyorozu who started shushing all the other guys, including Mineta who was shouting that ‘you had betrayed them all for Ketsubetsu!’ You were about to protest but Mina quickly slapped her hand over your mouth, nodding like a crazy person.

“In fact, you two should have some privacy! Off to your room, Y/N” And she discreetly whispered, “Preferably before Bakugo punches his face.”

Not my room. Not my room. You shook your head but Shindo took you by the arm and tightened his hand in warning. “Y/N, it’s the least you could do after I went through all the trouble of coming here.” It wasn’t until you both reached the stairs that Shindo dropped the smile, following your stiff movements to your room.

You waited until you were both safely away from prying ears and you closed your bedroom door behind him. “Shindo, you don’t need to be here. I don’t think we have anything to talk about unless you want me to apologize for troubling you?”

Your brain was running miles a minute. But you didn’t even know how much he remembered. Maybe just play ignorant for now.

Shindo sat down on your bed, throwing your purse carelessly onto a chair. God, he was so sinfully handsome in his black shirt and dark wash jeans. He knew how to flaunt his assets.

“Y/N, you need to stop playing games.” You hovered at the door and inched towards the doorknob… “If you decide to run away again, I’m going to fucking chain you to this bed until you hear me out.”

Scratch your idea of escape—but hot damn, you swallowed down your nervousness and felt your cunt throb. Being chained to his bed sounded far more appealing than it should. You tried to relax… tried to not show how much the threat turned you on. Because you clearly had priorities.

Like how he remembered that you ran away.

Shindo gestured for you to sit. You sat on the farthest corner away on the bed. Shindo gave a long-suffering sigh at your reluctance. “Y/N, I’m not going to bite. I’m not trying to trick you.” He took on a slightly more cajoling tone, tapping the sheets close to him.

“Shindo, I don’t think that’s a good idea.” You looked nervously between the bed and him. His eyes turned darker and his voice a little lower.

“Why?” Shindo breathed out.

You shook your head, recognizing the line of question – he was fishing. Better to still be ignorant. Better to stay on-topic.

“So.” You changed the topic. “What do you mean by playing games, Shindo? I’ve never….” You kept the unspoken words in your head, ‘played, I’m in love with you.’ You continued on, "I’ve never asked you to come in. You could’ve just turned this in and gone back to your girlfriend.” You decided to test the waters because maybe he only remembered parts and not the entirety. You could still salvage this situation.

Shindo scoffed again. “And they say I’m the player. So, what if I have a girlfriend? You mean you’d never date me right? Because you’re such a high-born princess. Telling all your friends out there how you’d never consider me.” Your hands tightened together on your lap.

“Does it matter? You don’t need another notch on your belt, you have someone amazing and wonderful. She’s probably an amazing girlfriend already.” You were confused at his disparaging tone. Why was he turning this around on you? Why did he want you to suffer here with him? Did he just want to humiliate yourself?

“I’ll be nice and cut to the chase Y/N. Do you think I’m the kind of asshole to cheat on … Tatami?” It seemed to take a second for him to say her name. Like he was uncomfortable.

Well, if he was going to be honest…. “Shindo, I don’t think you’re an asshole. You act like one but I know you care and you’re not as evil as you say you are.” You breathed deep, reminding yourself you would face him once and for all. “I think you were drunk, and I was in the wrong for doing what I did.”

“Then why did you do it?” Shindo stared at you.

“Because—” Wow, this was getting uncomfortable fast. “You probably wouldn’t remember, and I thought you wouldn’t care. Not that I would ever help someone cheat, but can I blame you for mistaking me for her?” You tried to give off a casual shrug. “It was dark, it was hard to see. Obviously, my fault for thinking it was something else right?”

Shindo quirked an eyebrow, giving you a vague ‘hmm’.

What was up with this?

“You said you wanted to talk, and I said my piece. Why don’t you just tell me what you want me to do? Tell Tatami? Tell you I fucked up?” You were getting a little peeved; Shindo was literally your wet dream and he was in your room. This was the stuff of your daydreams, but this was the worst situation imaginable.

“I think you’re lying to me.” Shindo kicked off his shoes and swung his legs up to make himself comfortable. “And I don’t feel like leaving until you tell me the truth.”

Oh dear lord, this man was insufferable.

You crawled across the bed and shoved a hand into his chest. Trying to push him off but he made himself more comfortable into your pillows. “You, Shindo, are dating another girl and you’re sitting in my room wanting what? The truth or did you want some sex? Because this sounds like you want some pussy and I’m not the kind of girl who gives it up like this.”

“You gave it up in the bathroom.” Shindo’s eyes fell to your revealed cleavage, the neckline of your sweater had fallen when you got onto the bed. You shoved his face upwards, indignant now.

“That was because I thought you wouldn’t remember and you would forget everything! Even if I confess to you, it doesn’t matter.” Your voice broke on the last word as you finally felt the tears come back.

Shindo’s arm reached out for your elbow, grasping it slowly. Almost like he was actually unnerved by the fact you were crying. The gentleness in contrast to his normal roughness was endearing. He even rubbed your arm as he waited for you to continue. “Stupid Shindo, don’t look at a girl crying. That’s what I call an asshole move.”

“Y/N, do you want to be friends with benefits then?”

“Absolutely not.” Your answer was immediate. You wouldn’t compromise your morals for even him. “I’m not gonna help you cheat now I know you’re dating.”

“So you wanna date me instead then?”

You looked to the side. “No...” Even if it was in the realm of possibility.

“Then why did you confess if you want nothing from me? You wanted a good fuck? Should’ve known you’re the one who wanted a notch on your belt….” He sighed in mock disappointment.

You turned to him, affronted for both you and him. Your feelings weren’t that shallow! If anything, he should know that about you. “I won’t be your friends with benefit because I’m too invested in you. I actually like you and I’m not stupid enough to do that!” You couldn’t handle that kind of relationship.

“Then why won’t you date me?” Shindo goaded.

You couldn’t believe his asinine words. “Did you not get how I said Tatami is literally perfect?!” You were furious enough to shove a punch at him and he dodged it. You scampered upright and gestured to yourself.

“I’m not delusional Shindo so please fucking shut up about dating. I’m not good enough for you,” You threw up your fingers to rattle off your points, “I’m not pretty enough, I’m not confident enough, I’m not sexy enough.”You couldn’t stop yourself, memories of your ex-boyfriend’s accusations came flying in. “I’m a ‘fucking selfish prude’ because I want to be a pro-hero more than anything; even more than a stupid relationship.” You caved into your stupid insecurities and rants, expecting Shindo take a step back. Any guy would walk away from this kind of crazy.

Because everything your ex-boyfriend had pointed out, showed that you would never be good at a relationship. You were too independent, you were too focused, you were too selfish to ever be a good girlfriend. But … “I know this and I wanted to know what one night with you would be like….” Your voice fell to a pathetic, desperateness that you never wanted him to hear.

There was a certain relief though. An ease because you knew he would probably run away and any chance of a relationship was crumbling apart. So, he would leave. Maybe he’d tell everyone downstairs how insane you probably sounded.

“In fact, you’d do yourself a favor if you walked out and forgot this all happened.” Emphasis on the word favor, with as much derision and contempt you could feel.

Shindo rubbed one of his hands at the base of neck as he looked to the side, sighing even more. “You’re a clusterfuck of issues, princess, aren’t you?”

Wow, great words there Casanova.  You gestured to the door in agreement. Obviously, you can leave. Because what could you say? You sighed heavily when he didn’t move though. It seemed he wanted to prolong your misery, embarrassment, and possibly the most botched confession of all time.

“Okay, yes, I’m a cluster fuck of issues. You deserve better than whatever my stupid feelings would take you. So just be happy because you deserve someone amazing.” You knew you were being contrary, you had just confessed to him and turned him down.

“You’re getting to be a broken record Y/N”. Shindo still didn’t leave. You closed your eyes for a few seconds, taking a deep breath in and out…. maybe he was just honestly needed a few minutes for it to sink in.

“Y/N, I’m still here. Closing your eyes and wishing me away isn’t gonna work.” Shindo was giving you a skeptical look now, cross-legged on the bed. He reached over to pull a pillow into his lap. Why was he getting even more comfortable?

Shindo sighed. “You’re a mess but now that the truth is out—the entire truth instead of this half-assed ‘I should be with Tatami’ shit, I have a few things to say.” Shindo wasn’t obtuse, he knew you had been looking at him. You had caught his eye from the get-go when he wondered what you looked like, what happened when your studious exterior was broken and stripped away. In fact, he thought of toying with you and fucking you once until your interest dissipated. It always did when girls found out his true nature. But you… you were different.

“First of all, I’m not dating Tatami. What she was calling me…” He rubbed his fingers between his furrowed brows. “She calls me that for shits and giggles in front of fangirls to mess with me.” You double-took at this.  “I was trying to hook up with you, Y/N, and I’m not dicking around with my friends.” Shindo grimaced at the mere thought.  “Whatever you came away with, I’m not desperate enough to pretend you were her.” You still felt yourself deflate though. He was dicking and fucking around right? At least he knew it was you… Much relief that was, you thought sarcastically.

Shindo waved his hand in front of your face, snapping his fingers. “Hey. Listen to me before you get the wrong idea.” Huh. Shindo was getting surprisingly good at reading you. “I don’t want to date Tatami but I want a chance at dating you.”

You … probably misheard that. “Dating who?”

Shindo chuckled. Actually, genuinely chuckled as he pointed at you. You threw a look over your shoulder to make sure there was no one behind you.  Shindo tried to look put off but his mouth was quirked up in amusement.

“Y/N, stop acting like an idiot. Look at me because I’m not done yet.” He looked relaxed with a bit of snark. You weren’t sure if even Shindo could fake this expression.

“Shindo, you want to date me, a fucking mess?” You interrupted him.

“Sounds like a mess that’s actually in love with me and willing to give me a chance.” Shindo wasn’t oblivious to the fact most women shied away from his dual-nature and strong dose of sadistic cruelty underneath his nice-guy exterior.

“Y/N, we’re both humans. We both have a lot of shit to work through, but it sounds like someone told you that they were an insecure asshole and took it out on you.” He wasn’t…. exactly wrong about your ex-boyfriend. You grimaced at the memories, of all the time you wasted on him.

“I personally wouldn’t mind a pro-hero girlfriend who takes no shit from anyone—even me. In fact, we can both compete for top 10 and beat out your UA classmates.” Shindo appreciated that you valued being a hero rather than a vapid girlfriend. It gave him a vaguely smug superiority to think of you being a hero of your own right, watch you flaunt your success to your UA classmates and watch them look on in envy when you were his girlfriend. Even blastie didn’t score this.

“And you said you weren’t sexy enough? Selfish prude? Y/N, that sounds like a guy didn’t know what he was doing.”

Some asshole obviously didn’t know what the fuck he was doing. You saying this was a fucking invitation to Shindo—you were a composed, staid, straight-laced kind of girl.  It turned him on since he wanted to see how your tight, nearly virgin pussy would take him. He wanted to see your discomposed face fall open in pleasure. He wanted to see how far he could break your composure and seriousness. Shindo had to shove his arousal down, feeling a wave of excitement at the thought of trying to find all your kinks and desires. God the possibilities were endless.

You, on the other hand, were leaning into him in confusion.

“This doesn’t sound like a reason for you to want to date me. It sounds like you’re playing nice-guy to make myself feel better and less crazy?”  In fact, you still half-expected Shindo would say this was all a joke.

Shindo felt his lip curve into a smile, slightly more cunning and a little more saccharine-sweet than you had ever seen him. “Come closer and I’ll tell you why you’re worth the trouble?” He crooked his finger and you felt yourself crawling towards him. He opened his legs, his soothing murmur acting like a lure for you—your worries were overwhelmed in face of his temptingly strong arms.

“Y/N.” You leaned in close—close enough for him to grab your head and crush his mouth over yours. You were so startled that you parted your lips in protest and he took the chance to forcibly shove his tongue in. He kissed like he was devouring you, his tongue licking into all the crevices of your mouth, tasting your sweetness and barely giving you a breath. One of his hands locked your waist in, another at the base of your neck as he refused to give you an inch of space.

This went on for long minutes until he finally lifted his mouth to give you a reprieve. You had been so close, so very close to rubbing your chest against his to feel more of his brawny muscle—but you still had enough reason to stop and shove at him uselessly. Little sanity that you had left…

“Are you suuuuper sure that you want to date someone like me?”

“I want to date you. I’m not in it for some pussy, babe. The truth is you like me despite that I’m a selfish two-faced bastard.” He rasped out. “That you like me enough to want me to be happy even though I want to fucking ruin you.” You found your thighs getting wet at his harsh voice. Shindo chuckled, almost as if he knew what he was going to you. “Some asshole doesn’t know how to handle you but that’s on them. I could have you riding, begging for me and making you come over and over if you were my girlfriend.” You felt his burgeoning erection and you had started to gyrate your hips with his—and you didn’t even realize. Your eyes were starting to glaze over with the promises he made…

But Shindo took on a more serious tone. “That you actually would cry over me because you want me here.” Your hands clenched in his black shirt, finding your sappy sentimental heart at war with the lust crawling from your hot throbbing cunt. As for Shindo…. He remembered your endearing show of affection. After you had left him in the bathroom, he had almost snapped at Tatami for ruining his post-coital moment. It actually felt nice to have you cuddle with him because he normally never cared for it.

“And you crying does things to me.” You looked up, a lilting questioning glint in your eyes. “I want to be the only one you’re crying about. Mostly when I’m fucking you, but I don’t want you with some other dick.” He wanted to be the only person you fell apart for.

“Shindo, I think that’s called sadism.” You quipped. Wow, in the heat of his confession, you still couldn’t hold back your commentary. Shindo liked this about you. Even in the throes of oncoming sex, you also could put him in his place but make him laugh.

“Hey, a relationship is all about compromise, right? It’s a fair trade when you’re the complicated one.” God, Shindo was crude but this confession was better than any flowery words ever could’ve been.

“I don’t know if it’s a compromise when I’m complicated and you’re a sadistic asshole… SHINDO!” Shindo thrust his erection into your clothed cunt as he cut the conversation short.

“Y/N, you’re either going to agree to be my girlfriend and I can fuck you right now. Or you can say no, and I will leave.” Shindo wasn’t really giving you a choice.

“Fine. If you are willing to take me, ‘clusterfuck’ of a mess as I am.” You said, finally feeling an inkling of hope beyond the fears you had built around yourself. You never thought Shindo would take a chance on you… nor you, on him. Because you were also starting to realize Shindo was never going to be the ideal, caring, considerate prince you had imagined in your childhood. And that wasn’t what you wanted. You wanted Shindo just as he was.

Shindo eagerly took off your shirt now, whistling once he saw your bra-less chest. “How could you keep this from me?” The bathroom lighting had done you no justice. You said you weren’t pretty but you were gorgeous. He muttered as much, you thought you even heard something about ‘thank god no one’s gonna fucking know how sexy you are’ but it was muffled as he stuffed his face between your boobs.  He started to slip off your shorts, but you stopped him with a soft kick. “Baby, that’s kinda violent don’t you think?” He didn’t let up though as he tugged it off.

You tugged at his shirt and put on a petulant pout, “Hey, I’m all for equality. Take off your clothes.” Shindo grinned and peeled off his shirt, finally letting you look at his muscled abs you had been admiring for months, that you had only taken peeks at. You impishly stole a kiss from him and unabashedly ran your hands down his abs.

“Wow, now that you’re not all desperate in a bathroom, you’re really mouthy.” He reluctantly ended the kiss, brushing a thumb against your lips at the end of his sentence. You gave a mischievous lick to his fingers, relishing the taste of Shindo’s skin. You craved more, leaning upward to lick the sweat off the base of his throat. He did a quick intake of breath as he growled, “Y/N, I thought you said you were a prude.”

You fell back onto the bed and gave a questioning look? “Apparently? I’ve never been so curious as to how someone else tasted.” You licked your lips to savor it a bit more. Shindo literally groaned.

“Stop saying shit like that or I‘ll be stuffing your mouth full of cock, babe.” Your face went beet-red as you suddenly stared down at his bulging briefs, of course he wore briefs, and envisioned it. “Oh babe, were you imagining it?” He cooed, smugness filling up the room. “You wanna see if I’ll take it slow? Let you get used to it?” He inched his briefs down, inch by inch. “Or will I stuff your face, watch you drool and choke on it?” You tried to cover your face because oh god, you had never been teased before.

“Oh baby, you’re in for so much if you’re embarrassed by just this.” Shindo was going to savor every bit of your embarrassed innocence.  This was pure gold. You were the picture of corrupted innocence with your hair splayed on the pillow, your chest and neck blushing pink, legs lewdly open and he could see the wetness gathering on your panties.

“Shindoooo” You whined.  

“Calm down, I’ll take it easy on you.” For now, he thought silently. He trailed his hand down, exploring the soft skin of your neck, teasingly brushing his hands over your hardened nipples… smirking when you squirmed underneath his gaze. His hand came to your stomach and he held still for a moment. He wondered if his cock could fill you up to the point you’d cry? A thought for another time. He slipped his finger underneath the waistband of your panties and grinned.

“How much do you like this pair?” You shrugged, not really knowing what he meant. At least until he slipped it off and held it tantalizingly to the side. “I kind of want a memento of our first official date.”

“Shindo, that is fucking nasty.” You could actually see how wet it was. Shindo shrugged.

“You said you were in love with me. Nasty is my default mode.” Shindo descended to your navel, sliding lower as he made himself comfortable. He propped one leg over his shoulder—wait, what was he doing? You were too new to this, but he couldn’t be thinking of that right?

“Babe, you gotta let me eat.” He swooped in while you tried to twist out of his grasp but he wasn’t going to let you escape. Never gonna let you run away again. Shindo hadn’t said this but the fact you were faster than him disgruntled him.  He licked deep into your cunt, opening up your moist, tight lips. You couldn’t move from the climbing pleasure as he lapped like a man starved. His mouth followed the throbbing of your cunt to the aching to your clit.  He gently suckled your clit, making breathy whiny gasps fall from your mouth.

“Last time was a little hard and fast. I wanna make sure you know I can be gentle as you want.” He let your orgasm build, watching the quivering of your thighs pull taut—and then the bastard withdrew.

“But is gentle what you want?” Shindo just…. breathed over your sensitive cunt. Didn’t move an inch. You could feel his fingers stroking your leg but nowhere near what you wanted. He was purposely edging you. “I remember what you said before. Are you my little fuck toy?” You nodded a little desperately. But it was not what he wanted to see, judging from his tightening fingers on your leg. He tutted at you.

What had he said before? You scrambled to remember. Remembered how he had lost control of himself at something you said… You realized. “Shindo, fuck your girlfriend like you mean it.” You reached a hand down to spread yourself open.

Shindo had expected something but not like that. “I was gonna go nice and slow because you’re my sweet little girlfriend, but it turns out you’re perfect for me.” He finally, finally started the slide of his fingers to probe deeper into your wet cunt and scissor your insides open. He was looking for that fleshy spot, leering at how your mouth fell open when he did find it. He turned his vibrating quirk on, watching you scream at the sudden quaking pressure. Only when you lay gasping and overstimulated, did he started inching his cock into your wetness. It was snug, tight, and still twitching from your orgasm--- Shindo’s eyes glazed over with pleasure, looking drunk on the feeling of you. 

Once he moved.. oh god. He was drinking up your little whimpers and sighs, starting a dominating rhythm. It didn’t matter what you said or how you begged; he thrust hard and fast,  kept you on edge when he slowed down, only to surprise you by pushing his cock punishingly hard against your sweet spot. It seemed like you were his little rag doll, subject to his whims—at least until he took pity on you, letting you orgasm when he finally came inside you. Even afterward, he kept you impaled and still on his cock. He enjoyed the feeling of cum slipping out of you, rubbing it back into your cunt. You shivered at feeling his fingers circle around, glazing your thighs with his release.

When you finally had some energy to talk, you scoffed. “That was gentle?”

“You should be glad that I didn’t vibrate my dick.” He shifted to lay on top of you, caging you in. You noticed he was careful not to crush you—something small that showed that he cared. He brought his slick fingers back to cup your face. “Gross, Shindo.” He grinned unrepentantly. He nuzzled your neck and you couldn’t resist playing with your boyfriend’s soft hair. It was a moment to cherish.

Then came his next statement. “Hey, what’s your dorm rules on boyfriends?” He barreled on, as if a thought just occurred to him. “Can I surprise McBlastie Bakugo in the morning? What I would give to see his face when he wakes up to see me.” He snickered. “So much for the fact you wouldn’t date me.“ You literally groaned for a whole different reason.

Shindo wasn’t going to let it rest though. When you stubbornly gave no answer, he took a different tactic. “Babe, don’t you want to show me off?” He cajoled you, rolling his hips a little deeper into yours. You clenched around him despite how tired you were. “Or we can just show off how I make you scream? Maybe we can even fuck on his bed?”

Okay. Shindo was an asshole and troll until the end of time, but he was officially your boyfriend. One part of having your dreams came true, you also had to forever mediate between him and your UA friends.

Eh. They could live with it.

[thegreatestofheck]

Heck’s Masterlist

OBX Masterlist

Since some of my fics are getting long, here’s a masterlist of everything I’ve made so far in relation to Outer Banks! It will continually be updated as more fics, blurbs, and requests are added!

Also, my requests are open! I don’t generally do smut, but I’m open to mostly anything else!

JJ Maybank 

Requests:  

Jump -  You are John B’s sister and you’ve been following him around your whole life. After deciding to make your own path, you find yourself caught up with a boy who is no good and JJ is the only one who can get you out of it.

Wedding Dress -  JJ makes a promise to himself that he’s now not sure he can keep.

Run - You’re John B’s sister and after sending him off on the Phantom, it’s up to you to cover for him. But Ward Cameron is still your legal guardian and he comes to collect his property.

Ransom -  John B’s sister is taken by the square groupers. In exchange for her life, they ask for the compass and a heavy ransom price. It’s a race of time as the Pogues, with the help of Sheriff Peterkin, journey into the marsh to save her life before the clock runs out.

Not So Unrequited -  in the middle of an argument with your best friend, he says something to you that you had never wanted to hear.

i love you -  your relationship with JJ had always been rocky, built on a mutual desire for affection. that doesn’t mean he would never break your heart.

fill the void - she always felt alone, so when he needed her most, she couldn’t resist.

promises, promises - You and JJ have an unspoken thing, passed only though stolen glances and half serious flirting. But the day after he takes the fall for Pope, you find yourself standing at a crossroads; do you step in to protect him from his dad, or do you stay out of it?

Series: 

Ocean and Alcohol - (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, Epilogue, Rafe’s POV)  You’re a kook, but your life is less than ideal. After a fight with some of the other kooks, you let slip a little about your home life to one JJ Maybank, who is more than intrigued. (reader insert with a name, tw: abuse, canon content)

Tempest and Gin - (1, 2)   The gold is gone, but Elma’s problems are just beginning. With her dad in police custody and her mom once again AWOL and refusing to pay for legal council, Elma and Ms. Lana struggle to get through the trial with a court appointed lawyer. At the end of her rope, Elma finds herself juggling friends, family, rivals, and enemies as she struggles to keep her wits about her and do the one thing she’s always done; protect Kid.

Girl With No Heartbeat - (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)  After a near death experience, JJ is saved by a girl in the water. When he and the Pogues find her washed ashore the next day, they are more than surprised to discover that she isn’t your everyday girl. (mermaid/siren au, canon divergence) 

Imagines:

Sweet as Honey, Hard as Steel -  JJ’s girlfriend is the complete opposite of everything one would expect. A straight A student with big life goals, Elena has never been the drinking, smoking, fighting type. And JJ wouldn’t have it any other way.

Coward -  Your mom just passed and your absentee father has come to collect you. But that means leaving the life you knew and loved, including your best friend (and a little more), JJ Maybank. But he isn’t ready to hear what you have to say on your last night together. 

Rafe Cameron

Series: 

Fire and Storm - Rafe Cameron had always wanted her. He wanted to be hers and he wanted her to be his. But she wasn’t and he was slowly beginning to realize that he never would be. (this is Rafe’s POV for a bit of another series, Ocean and Alcohol)

Requests: 

Better -  Secretly dating Rafe as JJ Maybank’s sister isn’t the easiest thing, especially when your brother finally learns the truth. 

Imagines: 

Meant to Be Yours -  Rafe Cameron, your boyfriend, was more broken than you realized. He wants more from you than you can give. (based on the song “Meant to Be Yours” from Heathers the Musical)

John B

Imagines: 

Girl Crush -  You spent years yearning after John B, your best friend. You just didn’t realize it until he fell in love with the most beautiful girl on the island...and it wasn’t you. After that, only Sarah Cameron was on your mind. (based on the song “Girl Crush”)

Tethered - (routledge!reader, John B’s little sister) Surfing the surge was a Pogue rite of passage. You had been waiting for the next big storm to show your older brother that you were ready to be one of them. But the storm was stronger than you or your brother could have imagined.

Just Come Home - (routledge!reader, John B’s little sister) You come home one day to find your brother bearing harsh news. 

Series:

By Dawn - (1, 2, 3) John B meets a mysterious girl at his court ordered group therapy. After spending weeks trying to get to know her, he slowly realizes that she’s a tough nut to crack. But then one day, she leaves him a cryptic message...the night before she goes missing. With the disappearance of his father still so raw in his mind, John B refuses to lose anyone else. And he will stop at nothing until he finds her.

Sarah Cameron 

Imagines: 

Girl Crush -  You spent years yearning after John B, your best friend. You just didn’t realize it until he fell in love with the most beautiful girl on the island...and it wasn’t you. After that, only Sarah Cameron was on your mind. (based on the song “Girl Crush”)

Kie Carrera 

Imagines: 

For Forever -  When you’re parents find out that you’ve been secretly dating your best friend, Kie, they go off on you. Afterward, she comforts you, reminding you that blood doesn’t mean family. (tw: homophobia, found family to the max) 

she -  As a Pogue, having a crush on Kie Carrera was almost a prerequisite. You knew that all the boys were crushing on her, at least a little bit, but accepting your own feelings for her is a different matter. (reader has a crush on Kie but isn’t really ready to admit her feelings) 

Requests: 

Nothing More -  You’re secretly dating one of the Pogues and your brother is starting to become suspicious. The only problem; he’s fixated on the wrong friend.

Pope Heyward 

Imagines: 

Nothing to Prove -  Pope helps you with some relationship problems. Later, while hanging out with your boyfriend, you realize that running from your fears got you nowhere and the only place you wanted to be was with Pope. (very soft)

Delivery Boy - With an absent mother and a distant father, you’ve always felt alone living in your empty house. But a certain delivery boy might be the one thing that makes running an estate worth it.

Seires: 

Bare Bones -  (Preview, Theory 1, Theory 2, Theory 3) Pippa Cantu has always been a little…strange. With a knack for knowing everything there is to know about every conspiracy, every mystery, and every weird happening, she doesn’t have much time (or desire) for friends. But when her chemistry lab partner asks her to join him and his friends on a hunt for the Royal Merchant, she just can’t say no.

Kelce 

Series: 

Simple Melancholy -  (2) Jemma “Little J” Maybank finds herself a little over her head when she accidentally falls for a boy from Figure Eight. Between her overly protective brother and Kelce’s incredibly rude friends, neither of them are sure how they’re going to make it, but they’re determined to.

General (Everybody)

Imagines:

Do Not Stand - One of the Pogues passes away and leaves a message for her friends. Each of them take it in a different way. 

Series: 

Little Village - (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, Finale)  As the oldest of the Pogues and John B’s big sister, June always acted as their mother. She helped with assignments and studying, helped pay bills when it was needed, made dinner, reminded them about hygiene. But then she got pregnant and her boyfriend left and suddenly she found herself unable to do all those things she was once able to. When they say it takes a village, she wasn’t entirely sure they meant a bunch of teenagers. (post-canon, I haven’t decided who the love interest will be or if there will be one at all, so that’s why its here)

Requests: 

Homeward Bound -  After spending years abroad at a boarding school, Kie’s sister returns to the Outer Banks. The Pogues quickly realize that, despite her cold exterior, there is a free spirit inside her just longing to break free. 

A Bunch of Love Stories Masterlist - A series of fics based on Taylor Swift’s album “Fearless”. 

Outerbanks Playlist - This is just a list of songs that remind of the Pogues and other characters in the show. A few of the songs are connected to some of my fics as well! 

ATLA Masterlist

Zuko

The Sun, The Moon, and the Stars - She is a non-bender from the Southern Water Tribe who somehow found herself smack in the middle of Fire Nation central, where a young prince is fighting an internal battle she hopes to help him win.

Harry Potter Masterlist

Fred Weasley 

warm - you and your husband survive the second wizarding war, but so do some of Voldemort’s old followers, and they are hell bent on revenge. 

Severus Snape

The Other Her -  Severus Snape had two friends while he was at school. One, every body knew as Lily Evans. The other was you, an unknown student who wanted nothing more than to be noticed by your friend. You couldn’t help but compare yourself to the Gryffindor heartthrob every time he mentioned her name.

Only One -  You return to Hogwarts years later to watch your son’s Quidditch match, only to find yourself a little bit in over your head.

Criminal Minds Masterlist

Derek Morgan

breathe again -  he saved her life and now she has to deal with the aftermath. he’s there to help her every step of the way.

Aaron Hotchner

dark of the night -  an agent gets taken in the middle of an investigation. in a race against time, the team at the bau must find her by diving into her deepest secrets. when a video tape arrives with horrible images of the state of their friends, aaron hotchner realizes just how terrified he is of losing her. 

The Musketeers (BBC) Masterlist

Porthos

enough for you -  the wife of a musketeer reflects on her relationship with her husband while Porthos watches from the sidelines.  

[choosing-criminalminds]

One More Time

Summary: Their love was years and years in the making, and even when prison quickly builds back up the walls they worked so hard to break down, Spencer learns just how strong the foundation of their trust is.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!BAU!reader(ish) -> told mostly in the 3rd person, from Spencer’s POV

Category: angst (?)

Warnings: mentions of character death (Maeve, Gideon), mentions of blood (Maeve’s death), slight panic/anxiety, language -> let me know if there are any more to add!

Also, un-beta’d, we die like the trash we are.

Length: 5.6k

A/N: Okay yeah so first post. So…this turned out much longer than expected? This is for Ellie’s ( @spenciebabie ) writing contest/celebration and goodness I’m so nervous because I’ve barely written, much less posted, anything in years. Anyway, I guss I decided to challenge myself to write this? I hope you guys like it?

Also, if anyone wants a new friend, please hit me up because I’m too shy to say hello myself.

Prompt was: “Why don’t you make me?”

-*-*-*-

“Trust has to be earned, and should come only after the passage of time.”

—Arthur Ashe

-*-*-*-

For all his genius, Spencer didn’t know what to make of the fact that he found himself inexplicably drawn to her.

It wasn’t until years down the line that he realized he had been exceptionally aware of her since they met, carefully observing, cataloguing the way she so gently and kindly defied every expectation and pushed past every preconceived notion he had of her. By then, she had already settled in a little corner of his heart and helped seal the cracks in his life that he didn’t even know existed.

But when she first joined the team as an intern, he was more than a little reluctant to get to know her. It was during the summer between her college graduation and the start of her graduate studies, and she seemed too worldly, too perfect. She wasn’t like the girls from high school, or even college, for that matter, who were simply mean. On the contrary, she was wonderfully polite and incredibly ambitious, intelligent, and very much the type of girl that was far too out of his league, one that wouldn’t spare him a second glance before continuing down whatever focused path she was on.

That’s why he planned to avoid her as much as possible her first day in the office. She had, thankfully, spent the morning in Hotch’s office, since he was her official supervisor, but when he saw them about to emerge right before lunch, he panicked, muttered a random excuse, and shuffled out of the bullpen, leaving a bemused Derek and Elle in his wake.

It didn’t help that he was ducking out of rooms while JJ was giving her a quick tour and making introductions, and almost every member of the team had cornered him, encouraging him to talk to her, to befriend her due to their closeness in age. (“She’s only what? Two-ish years younger than you?” When he mumbled that exact date, Penelope had broken into a large, wicked grin, poking him teasingly in the cheek. Gratefully, she held back any further comment.)

Spencer had blinked, a little surprised, when Penelope Garcia, who generally disliked change, had only good things to say. Remarkably humble about her achievements, and not in the standoffish fake way, Penelope commented after admitting she had run a background check on her. Genuine, and quite sweet.

Polite, Derek had said, if a little quiet, trying to see where she fits in the team dynamic. You should reach out, be a friend, he suggested.(Spencer ignored the very pretty slipped somewhere in the comment, as well as the knowing smile shot his direction when he felt his cheeks flushing.)

A surprisingly wicked sense of humor, was all Elle said with a sly smile. (Spencer chose to ignore that too.)

And when Spencer tentatively asked the man, Jason Gideon, a man of generally few words, had spoken of her, however briefly, with surprising fondness, because of course Gideon had met her when she was a child, because of course her uncle now headed legal three floors up, and of course her uncle was the last third of the BAU’s Holy Trinity, of which Gideon and Rossi were a part of.

You’ll get along very nicely.

Spencer was incredibly intimidated, to say the least.

And then when he couldn’t avoid her anymore (because of course they were desked next to each other), all it took for her was noticeably catching herself from extending a hand, then offering a small little wave and a nervous smile to leave him breathless. (He pointedly ignored the look knowing look JJ shot him.)

He tried to stifle the little seed of hope—that she definitely wasn’t interested in him, and her saccharine smile was nothing more than a false front to make a positive impression during a lucrative FBI internship meant only to bolster her resume—but the resolve crumbled quickly. She turned out to be so genuinely kind and sweetly humble that Spencer cursed the fact that the internship lasted only through that summer.

It also certainly didn’t help, either, that the very first thought he had when meeting her was a single word.

Pretty.

-*-*-*-

It was almost ridiculous how well she got along with everyone in the office.

She clearly made it a mission to make the most of the time she had and was more than willing to put in the work and prove her worth. Although she was technically Hotch’s intern and her main role was to assist the core field team, Spencer watched as she managed to get on absolutely everyone’s good graces through a combination of unassuming charm, sharp wit, and willingness to learn and to help that was so uniquely her.

For Spencer, it meant that she happily listened to what he had to say, encouraging him to continue when appropriate or saving a quiet question for later when it wasn’t. When she told him that she enjoyed listening to him talk, Spencer was taken aback, stuttering as he tried to figure out if she was only saying that to be polite. She gave him a gracious smile, ensured that she “quite honestly enjoyed” listening to him, and proceeded to ask a few well-timed and well-pointed questions to smoothly nudge him back to their previous topic.

Spencer stared at her, slack-jawed, then smiled bashfully, and allowed himself to hope.

(He definitely didn’t know what to do with the fact that when she knowingly reached out to his hand resting on the table and lightly tapped the back of his hand, he didn’t have his typical knee-jerk desire to pull away. He also mostly certainly didn’t know what to do with the fact that when her thumb grazed over his knuckles to sooth the tension he didn’t even realize he had, he felt an inexplicable calm ease into his very bones.)

-*-*-*-

“It’ll take a good five, six years to finish my J.D./Ph.D., but Hotch offered me an open invitation to join the team when I do, and I’m more than inclined to take his offer when the time comes.”

Spencer peered at her, breathing out a sigh of relief that he didn’t realize he was holding. It was the last day of her internship, and she was making the rounds to say her thank you’s and goodbyes individually to the members of the team. He was the last one, and he had been dreading the conversation the entire day.

While he wouldn’t describe what he felt for her as anything beyond a genuine, platonic friendship—in the grand scheme of things, they’d only known each other for ten weeks—their easy companionship had become very dear to him. And he was terrified and nervous that her time with the BAU would be just a small chapter in her life before she moved on to the bigger and better things, leaving him behind as a fond but distant memory.

She laughed softly at his surprise, before it trailed off into a sigh. She then took a deep breath and asked. “Do you trust me?” Spencer looked at her, a bit dumbfounded. Did he trust her? Her gaze was heavy on him and the question weighty, a gentle demand for an honest answer. Did he trust her? Yes, he did, he supposed, they were friends. Right? He breathed in deeply, squared his shoulders just a bit, and answered in the affirmative.

As if she sensed his hesitance, his unease, she gave him a knowing look and took one of his hands into hers, fingers brushing over fingers, before hooking her pinky around his. “Because I promise you, Spencer Reid, I’ll be back, right here. You’ll be waiting for me, yeah?”

He looked at her in awe, the dim light of the nearly-empty office reflecting off her kind eyes. Warmth spread through his chest, and she smiled so brilliantly that he nearly forgot to breathe, to answer. To answer. He smiled back, twitchy, introspective, and considered the weight of her question. He nodded and responded simply.

“Always.”

-*-*-*-

She managed to remain on the Bureau’s consulting payroll over the next several years, though she was primarily based in the Bay Area as she finished her graduate studies at Stanford. The team as a whole still went to her for a fresh perspective when needed; she video called in to help on cases when necessary and met up in person if a case called them to California.

He knew that she kept in touch with JJ, Penelope, and Derek, and that Hotch and Emily (whom she met shortly after Emily joined the team and a case brought them to LA) were also friendly, if professional, contacts. Spencer himself was known to receive the odd phone call from her.

However, what had Spencer almost covetously pleased was that they had something they shared exclusively between the two of them, because she had steadfastly kept her promise to write to him.

-*-*-*-

Her letters were as beautiful as they were constant, and Spencer handled and read each one with care.

Her handwriting suited her; while it generally was neat and clear little scrawl, he knew it would get a little freer, and little loopier when she was tired, if she was particularly excited, or if she found herself a bit tipsy. (And yet she still managed to always write in an almost perfectly straight line even on a blank sheet of paper. He was envious, and when he told her as such, he could hear the laughter in her response as she wrote it a little more wobbly than usual.) And while he knew her to be tilted more on the quiet, introverted side of the scale, she had a way with the written word, each phrase poetic and thoughtful.

And they were remarkably therapeutic to write in return, Spencer found. Their initial letters mostly consisted of light banter about their mutual and individual interests, updates on the progress of her research (sprinkled amusing tidbits of her exasperation and frustration), bits and pieces about his cases and updates on and amusing anecdotes about the team.

However, over time, he slowly opened up to her, about his fears, his hopes, his dreams. And when he hesitantly divulged bits and pieces about the drugs, his mother, the headaches, he felt the relief in his entire body when she responded with empathy and grace. In turn, she did the same. She was vulnerable, she was open, and as wonderful and quite near perfect as he knew her to be, he was pleased to find her so incredibly human.

Those letters he slowed down to read, committing them to memory with more intention.

(He kept her letters in the drawer of his desk at his apartment, and eventually moved them to a specially designated box when he needed more room. When he learned that she did the same, he couldn’t help the tender warmth that fluttered in his chest. He still didn’t know what to do with the feeling.)

-*-*-*-

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder.

It took six years, and an additional five months at the Academy (and then another few weeks as she was introduced to the legal team, with whom she would also be working with in her role as legal liaison), but she kept her promise and found her way back to the BAU, and it was like she was never gone.

This time, in her re-introduction to the team, she was a breath of fresh air.

When she approached him individually with a nervous smile, she reached out, then hesitated, and a sense of déjà vu washed over Spencer. But then, she had placed a hand on his elbow, and when she smiled, he breathed in a sense of peace and familiarity, of comfort.

“You waited.”

He smiled back, and in a rather forward gesture on his part, he adjusted so he could take the hand on his arm into his.

“Always.”

-*-*-*-

She was too good for him.

Whatever relationship they had—Spencer didn’t know what to call it, though friendship seem too trivial of a word for it—he knew it was too good, too perfect to last.

Because in a cruel twist of fate, her first case back on the team, however unofficial it was, was Maeve.

He was hyperaware of the neutral expression on her face when he finally brought his fears to the team. To anyone else she would seem serene and put together, but to him the slight sag in her shoulders and the realization transitioning to acceptance were clear as day. Spencer never mentioned Maeve to her in their letters, but later, in retrospect, he believed she had an inkling, at the very least. You seem happier, she had written, once, not too long after he first became acquainted with Maeve, and that makes me happy.

Did it? Then he didn’t want to know what his misery would do to her because then, Maeve died, and in his grief over another woman, he fought desperately to push her away.

She could share his happiness, but he refused to let her share his pain, his brokenness. She did not deserve that, and he would not be the one to destroy the beauty and sunshine and hope she brought everywhere with her.

But when they finally took Maeve’s body away, and when the blurred commotion of sirens and law enforcement and emergency services and constant hammering of half-hearted condolences and check-ins finally died down, he felt the blanket around his shoulders be adjusted, and a now-familiar pair of hands take in his own, firm, and refusing to ever let go. Thumbs traced over his knuckles as soothingly as he remembered, and only then did he begin to vaguely process the fact those hands had been tucked into his almost the entire evening, anchoring him through the haze and the fog.

As if on cue, she squeezed his hand gently, like she knew exactly when he was slowly becoming aware of her presence, and he suddenly found he lacked the strength to do what he initially intended.

Still dazed, he felt her shift, and she was kneeling on the ground in front of him where he sat on the curb, and softly drew him into a hug. Any form of resistance he previously had dissolved; he clung to her, tears stinging his eyes once again.

It’s okay, I’m here, I’ll stay, she whispered, I’ll stay, always and always.

Just don’t push me away.

“I-” His voice cracked. “I loved her.”

He paused, his voice weakening.

“I love her...”

Hands ran soothingly through his hair.

“I know.”

She always did.

“…so much.”

He didn’t need to see her face to realize that she was crying with him, for him—he could feel her trying to contain the trembling in her chest, trying desperately to remain composed. He tried to do the same, but when she tilted her head and let him bury his face into her neck, Spencer finally felt fresh tears begin to flow, and he allowed her to take his face into her hands and chase the tears with her fingers.

And Spencer wept freely, first for death of the woman he loved, and then for the tears and the grief he caused the one person he could call his kindred spirit, his soulmate.

-*-*-*-

He healed, slowly.

There were good days, when the thought of Maeve did not stir up memories of blood and fear and gunshots but, rather, of auburn hair and admiration and hushed conversations on the phone. On those days, he felt like he was no longer haunted by a ghost and could finally begin to move on. On those days, he could slow down, appreciate the small things again, and focus on how a pair of familiar, steady hands pulled him out of the past, anchored him in the present, and allowed him to hope about the future.

But then there were the bad days when her touch scalded and burned his skin. The warmth and the pulse of blood rushing through her veins and the germs on her hands and her life was overwhelming because Maeve was dead and cold and gone. So, with every glare and with every sharp comment aimed at where he knew it would hurt, he finally made good on his desire to push her away.

It was on those days the bitter voice in the back of his mind whispered how it was supposed to be Maeve, not her, there alive with him, holding his hand as they faced the world.

It was also on those days he chose to disregard the regret that settled in the pit of his stomach each time he heard his own biting voice, and disregard the horror brought on by even thinking of wishing she were dead instead. He began to ignore the tremble in her hands when she reached out to him and brushed her fingers against his in concern, and he ignored how she gradually began pulling back, hesitant, nervous that her touch would be unwarranted, unwanted. He certainly ignored the unconscious flex in his hand, the ache for the reassurance and comfort he had become so accustomed to—

He ignored it all until he woke up, one night, to an empty bed, and a sudden surge of panic rushed through his body and bile rose in his throat. She was right there, when he fell asleep, giving him a small smile and nod when he asked if she could read to him, to stay the night. Now, without a word, she was gone, she was gone, shewasgone and Spencer could feel the tightness in his chest and tears sting his eyes when realized that the only one to blame was himself, himself, himself.

Why, he thought bitterly, why was he like this? Why must he try to push away every good thing in his life?

But then, there he stood, barely aware of the tears on his cheeks and ice running through his veins, as he found her curled up on his couch, franticly wiping away her own silent tears and exhaustion from her eyes. He stumbled forward, upset, upset at himself because he made her cry again. And when she flinched when he cradled her face in his hands, apologizing to him, he nearly choked back a sob, his hands trembling as he tried to wipe away the tears that did not belong on her face.

Neither of them went back to sleep that night, and Spencer began to realize just how strong she was, as she gently told him through her tears the hard truths of his situation and where she stood in relation to him.

I can’t fight with a ghost, she had murmured hoarsely, but I can work with her legacy and her memory.

And then, with a pinky wrapped around his, she promised that she would be there to help him through it, but the only way was if, and only if, he let her.

It was that night (or, rather, morning, as the sun rose) that he began to come to terms that, whether he deserved it or not, she—and her pure and unadulterated goodness—was more or less a permanent fixture in his life, and he felt more at peace than he had in ages. And when the early rays of sunlight filtered through his windows and caught her in a soft glow, he found himself once again in awe. He reached out, hesitantly, and his heart soared when he felt the familiar pressure of her hand slipping into his.

She was steadfast and loyal and strong. She was brave, she was patient, she was kind. Moreover, she was alive, she was breathing, and she was here, present, by his side. It took time, and more painful conversations and more painful realizations, but eventually, the good days were a bit more consistent, the sun just a bit brighter, and his breathing a just bit freer with her hand pressed firmly into his own, her pulse thrumming beneath his fingers until his heartbeat synced with hers.

And Spencer was finally learning, learning about what to do with the fact that with her by his side, he felt like he could truly face the world.

-*-*-*-

Face the world he did.

When Gideon died, he felt his hand twitch, and the compulsion to escape and hide tugged at the back of his mind, and an old, nearly forgotten itch made its way from the crook of his elbow, slowly ebbing into in his veins and nagging in the crevices of the back of the mind.

But when he felt her hand slip into his, he felt it abate, the tension in his muscles eased. When her lips twitched into a knowing, gentle smile, he could see the underlying grief and frustration. Of course. She had known Gideon just as well as he did, if not better.

He breathed deeply and smiled back. It was weak, it was twitchy, and it was sad, but it was a smile, nonetheless. He wasn’t in this alone.

-*-*-*-

They were seated on a large blanket in a secluded park in D.C. on one of their rare days off when she pressed a gentle kiss on his lips, and suddenly it seemed like all the right pieces finally fell into place.

And when she whispered those three little words, and everything made sense. He looked up from where he laid, and again he was breathless at how the setting sun caught in her hair and reflected off her skin and her eyes. But then, when he opened his mouth to respond, the same three little words caught in his throat and his breath hitched, and he wanted to cry. He wanted to respond, to let her know that her feelings were returned, but the words failed him.

“It’s okay,” she murmured softly, and he trembled as he felt her hands cupping his face and fingers gracing over his cheekbones, “if you don’t reciprocate; I’ll live. But I just wanted to let you know–know that I’ll be by your side no matter what happens.”

It wasn’t until they were at the door of her apartment, when he found the strength to push past the nerves and respond.

“I do re-reciprocate, and I want–I want to say it, because I do,” he stuttered out, “but I just…don’t know how to say it yet.”

He suddenly felt like a prepubescent schoolboy, nervous and quaking and terrified. But then, magnetic as she was, she brought his gaze back to her face, and her knowing smile breathed air back into his lungs. His heart blossomed, and the fingers rubbing circles into his hand anchored his attention on her. “Then I’ll wait until you can. Always. Forever.” She paused. “Do you trust me?”

Spencer peered up at her, brows furrowed. Unbidden, the memory of the first time she asked him the same question floated to the front of his mind, and he couldn’t help the breath of amusement. The question caught him off guard, but this time, when he found his voice it was resolute, quick, and sure.

Yes.

He felt a pinky hook around his, and the now-familiar warmth bubbled in his chest.

“Good, because it’s a promise I intend to keep.”

This time, the tears her fingers caught were those of appreciation and relief.

-*-*-*-

And then, the sun set, and prison happened.

-*-*-*-

At first, it was easy to ignore.

Prison changed him. He knew it did, and he knew that she wasn’t naïve to the fact either. He was a bit harder, a bit more defensive, and while he tried his best not to show it, he knew she could see the darkness had just a little bit more of an edge. He was well aware of how she watched him just a bit more closely.

It seemed alright at first. It took a while for him to adjust; there were certainly bumps and bruises along the way, along with some admittedly choice words exchanged in frustration, but that was expected.

But he supposed it was the small things, and small things add up.

The first week her hand naturally slipped into his like nothing’d changed, but his grip was tighter and more desperate than normal, like she’d disappear or slip through his fingers if he didn’t. At the same time, he was also too terrified to touch her otherwise, as if she’d break like glass if his grip on her waist was just a bit too tight.

She never commented, gave him space, and allowed him to initiate physical contact.

She didn’t need to know, he rationalized, it wasn’t her burden to bear.

Then he began to hold her at arm’s length. She pushed, gently, and he pushed back, harder. He knew she was only trying to help, but he needed to figure it out for himself, lest he hurt her again. She only sighed, and relented. While her concern was apparent with how she watched him with just a little more unease, she gave him space.

However, while she was an exceptionally patient person, there was only so much distance and space one could handle. When she reached out, worried, and pressed just a little harder, he withdrew completely, and his rationalization slowly evolved. Stop hovering. Don’t need you treating me like I’m broken. Don’t need your pity.He ignored the pain that flashed in her eyes, the quiet desperation in her voice whenever she called after him after he refused to listen, and the increasingly familiar ache in his entire body when he began to avoid and refuse her touch.

It was the small things, because when the nightmares started, it wasn’t so easy to ignore.

-*-*-*-

“—eathe, Spencer. That’s good, breathe.”

The mumbled affirmations continued as he slowly processed his surroundings.

Queen-sized bed. Egyptian cotton sheets. Breathe in. Goose-feather down pillows. A firmer memory foam pillow that smelled of her shampoo. Breathe out.

Safety.

He was still bleary-eyed when he sunk back down, burying half his face in the pillows and ashamed as he mumbled a quiet apology. Her voice was kind, understanding, telling him it was alright as she tucked a stray lock of curls away from his face. When he seemed to settle back down, her hand gentle rested on his jaw, thumb absently tracing his cheekbone.

“Do you want to talk—”

“No.”

She frowned, sighed, took a moment to flick on the lamp light and collect her thoughts; he could see, through his lashes, the gears turning in her head about how to proceed. Meanwhile, he heaved a sighed, and sat up against the headboard. His eyes closed, doing the same as her. She then reached out, touched his hand, grazed her thumb over his knuckles and drew circles on the back. It started slow, hesitant—she was surprised that he didn’t recoil, and frankly, so was he—but the motion was familiar, grounding, so he let her continue. He knew it helped her focus as well.

“Spence, you’re…you need to talk to someone—it doesn’t have to be me! But bottling it up all inside, it’s clearly tearing you apart.”

“I agreed to start talking with my therapist, haven’t I?”

His voice was flat, defensive.

“But you haven’t, and…knowing you, you won’t be telling them the whole truth.” His jaw tightened and his lips pursed, his hand gripping the sheets flexed, and he looked away from her, intently staring at a random point in the room that wasn’t her. As always, she seemed to know him far too well.

She let out a breath of a sigh; she knew he was beginning to shut her out again. Her free hand lifted to his shoulder, rested in the crook of his neck.

“I’ve told you before, that you’ve started to shut people out. I know–I know you’re so, so strong, but you don’t have to face it alone. You don’t need to hold the weight of the world on your shoulders; we’re not as fragile as you seem to think we are.” She paused, contemplating. “If you need someone with distance that you can trust, call Derek, call Hotch, even, but remember, Spence, I made you a promise: I’ll always be here for you, no matter what.”

When he didn’t answer, still staring off into the mid-distance, she sighed.

“I’ll leave, give you some space. Think about it.”

She was at the bedroom door when he finally cleared his throat and responded. His voice was bitter as he bit out: “You’re going to have to do a lot better than that.”

A quiet ‘wha–’slipped from her lips as she angled toward him as he shifted to sit on the edge of the bed, hands gripping the sheets tightly.

“If you want to leave, fine. You seem to be doing that quite well recently. The door’s right there and you don’t have to come back until you want to make me a charity case again. But if you want me to talk, if you think you can handle it, then be my guest. Take a seat and why don’t you make me?”

He instantly regretted the words, but some dark part of his mind as pleased that he could see the anger and annoyance spark through her as she inhaled deeply and slowly turn around to face him in full. “I will if that’s what it will take.”

Spencer’s gaze hardened.

“You don’t have the fucking guts.”

A brief moment passed as she took him in full, eyes flashing. Spencer raised his gaze, challenging, daring her, and then, the same, shadowed part of his mind was savagely happy that he had finally gotten a rise out of her, because she bit back with venom.

“Fucking try me.”

And then, he watched her warily as she visibly froze, then deflate, her jaw tightening and eyes welling with unshed tears as she stumbled backward to the door.

“But–but not like this. Not like this. I’m–I’m so sorry you didn’t–you don’t deserve…” Her voice was quiet, but it was hitched with a swirl of emotions Spencer couldn’t pinpoint, and he was suddenly aware of the hot tears dripping down his cheeks. “I’m going–I’m going to go…” He heard the doorknob turn, and suddenly the sound of gunshots rang in his ears, and he could the taste the metallic bitterness as blood and dead brown eyes filled his vision.

Wait. Wai- She was halfway out the door when he called out, voice cracking, and through blurred tears he saw her shut the door and shuffled and stumbled back into the room toward him, kneeling in front of him. Through the ringing in his ears, he could hear the whispers of his name and the urgency of the apologies. And then his eyes fluttered closed when she reached up to brush the tears away, and the motion opened the floodgates. It was one of the many little touches they shared—thumbs wiping over cheeks and hands cupping faces—and he had half a mind to shove her aside, but dear God he hadn’t felt it in far too long; he leaned, almost desperately, into her touch and he could hear her sniffling back her own tears.

Fuck.

He was always like this.

His passive aggressiveness was his defense mechanism; he lashed out blindly whenever he felt vulnerable, not caring who he hurt and how much. It was something she had been helping him work through, and he thought he was getting better, but here he was, hurting her because of it again.

Not like this.

He barely noticed that she had pulled him into a tender hug, but now that he did process the warmth of her embrace seeping into his bones, he wanted to push it away. He didn’t – he didn’t deserve this but now she was pulling back, and it sent a brief course of panic through his body, a fear that she was pulling away, away from him, away from the darkness and shadows that loomed permanently over him. He wouldn’t blame her, but–but…oh.

Her eyes always spoke volumes for her, and now that she had firmly tilted his chin up, her gaze firm, resolved.

“I know you are feeling vulnerable, and I know that you believe you can do this on your own.” She breathed in deeply. In turn he gazed up at her through his tears, as evenly as he could, and she met it without wavering. “You are strong, Spencer Reid, so, so strong, been so for so long. But…but I made a promise that I would always be by your side, and I’m never going to break it. So please.” Her voice hitched, and his breath caught in his throat. “Please, trust in me, one more time. Just one more time.”

Moments ticked by to the time of his heartbeat before he finally nodded, and the relief and the elation in her eyes soothed the dull pain inside his heart. This time, he drew her into his arms and into his lap and sighed as he leaned into the crook of her neck.

Thank you.

I love you, too.

-*-*-*-

“Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time.”

—Maya Angelou

-*-*-*-

[yolkyeomie]

Improv Game | Yang Jeongin

summary — maybe following the script of what’s ahead isn’t for you and a little bit of improv is all you need to make it better

word count — 1.9k words

pairing — gender neutral!reader x jeongin (ft. x hyunjin)

genre — high school au, transmigration(?) au, fluff, cliff hanger

disclaimer — this is VERY loosely based off of series like Extraordinary You and the awfully popular reincarnation webtoons i’ve seen like… everywhere. I JUST NEEDED SUMN TO WRITE OKAY?

You strained a smile at the boy in front of you, rhythmically tapping your fingers on the desk in hopes that he’d pick up your annoyed undertone. Though to no avail did he notice. He simply took it as your way of attentively listening to him speak and that’s all he would ever take it as, he was rather oblivious after all. You couldn’t exactly blame him for this unfortunate trait of his but you couldn’t stand it either.

“Oh, Y/N, if you don’t mind me asking…,” the boy began, leaning back in his chair as he held onto the desk for support. His eyes wandered from the front of the classroom then to the classroom window where the cherry blossoms were on full display to finally your eyes.

You didn’t mean to make direct eye contact with him but he caught your gaze a lot quicker than you could look away. With a deep sigh you stretched your arms out before turning your genuine attention to him, “What’s up, Hyunjin? Go ahead and spit it out.”

He cleared his throat for the moment, his eyes darting away from your connected gazes before mumbling something out of his mouth. The boy glanced at you to see if you had heard him and when you showed no signs of understanding, he cleaned his throat again. “I said if you’re not busy any time like… I don’t know— tomorrow? If you wanted to hang out? Like go to the park or an arcade or—“

“—like a date?” You questioned, raising a brow in suspicion.

Hyunjin immediately started to crumble, his face flushing a beetroot red and his ears practically steaming from your words. “No, no! Not a date! I would like… never ask you on a date! Unless you want it to be a date…? I mean if you don’t think it’s a date then it’s not a date—!” The boy continued to ramble, nearly forgetting about your existence as he tried to cover himself.

You were in a very… odd situation to say the least. One day you had woken in a room that wasn’t yours, in a house that wasn’t yours, with friends you didn’t know, going to a school you never went to. Only one could imagine the amount of disarray you were in as you tried to traverse the day struggling to get from one place to another when you didn’t have a clue of what was exactly going on.

You thought, maybe if you just get through this day, everything will go back to normal when you wake up again? As if this was all some sort of… dream your mind had created in your slumber.

But alas, that was definitely not the case. You woke up the next day in the nearly same situation you were in before. And the same in the next day, and the day after that. Soon days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months. You were still living throughout each day as if you had never really woken up in the unfamiliar at all.

The kicker? You had quickly caught onto the fact that you were within a book, maybe even a comic who knows, and were walking around as the main protagonist. Well, quickly isn’t the right word per say. A week went by as if everything was normal until you interacted with a teacher who had asked for you after school.

The conversation was as normal as any conversation with an adult would go until you looked above their head and saw words in bold quotation marks detailing words that hadn’t been spoken yet. Without thinking, you read them out loud and the teacher responded exactly to what you had read out. You didn’t think anything of it at first until the routine you had adapted yourself to suddenly changed to fit the words you had read to him.

The world was shaping around the detailed actions and words the story was instructing you to take. Sometimes it would be something simple like helping your teachers with their work and other times if quite literally instructing you to get hit with a soccer ball in the face. You didn’t want to follow through when things like the latter were given to you, but they would just happen whether you liked it or not.

Oh and your main love interest? It was Hyunjin. You’d think having someone fated to fall in love with you and vice versa would be interesting and exciting to you, but you weren’t feeling it all.

Don’t get it wrong, Hyunjin is a very nice kid. He’s tall and handsome with a sweet personality, but he just… wasn’t your type? So trying to get your “character” to fall in love with him was hard. Especially when whatever author that was scripting your interactions together made them happen extremely frequently and in rather annoying ways.

Not a day goes by where you can get some peace and quiet. Whenever you thought you’d be free, Hyunjin would always pop up to greet you or keep you company or even pull you to the next step of your growing relationship when you really didn’t want to.

It seemed like the date-that’s-not-really-a-date-but-it-totally-is was the next step into pushing you two closer to each other. It had to be, given the fact that the next sentence that was supposed to come out of your mouth had appeared over his stressed out figure.

You concealed a deep sigh as you placed your hand on his shoulder in an attempt to calm him down. The boy immediately stopped in his tracks, turning to face you with wide and curious eyes. You flashed him your best smile possible, “Yes, let’s make it a date.”

The boy nearly popped a vein, blinking rapidly and his cheeks growing warmer and warmer at your answer. “You… Do you really mean it? Like… this wouldn’t be just two friends hanging out— this will be a whole date?”

“Do you even know what the definition of a date is? Of course it’s a whole date!” You recited, watching Hyunjin’s eyes begin to glow and his smile stretching from ear to ear.

A small hum of satisfaction left his lips as he jumped up from his seat, struggling to contact his excitement. “Okay then! It’s… it’s a date?”

“It’s a date.”

“It’s a date!” He exclaimed, catching the attention of nearly the entire class. Luckily it was a free period so you didn’t have to worry about interrupting the class instruction but it was still embarrassing. You practically sunk in your seat and covered your face to the best of your ability as Hyunjin hopped about the room in glee. “Jeongin, Jeongin! You’ll never guess what happened to me!”

Your head immediately shot up upon hearing the name uttered from the boy’s lips, your eyes glued straight onto Hyunjin’s back. The boy was jumping up and down in the door and his back was blocking the view of whoever was in front of him, but you didn’t exactly mind. You simply waited for him to stop moving before finally spotting the familiar dimpled boy in front him, his pretty smile and excited eyes on the main love interest.

Jeongin, the main love interest’s best friend and the device used to move the plot forward, that’s exactly who he was. Minus the fact that you liked Jeongin a lot more than you liked Hyunjin.

Your body so desperately wanted to move on it’s own, your eyes following the boy’s every move as he expressed his delight for the boy’s accomplishments.

The mischievous glint in his eyes every time was mesmerizing, the pretty tone of voice he had was exhilarating, and his unique features almost made him too good to be true. Not to mention how genuinely funny he was without even trying, he was much more your speed than the gullible and kind Hyunjin that you were paired with.

Unfortunately, the story you were placed in would never let Jeongin think of you more than a friend. He just wasn’t scripted that way. While Hyunjin may love you unconditionally because that was his purpose, you didn’t find it as appealing as perhaps a reader or any other normal main protagonist would be.

Plus, you had no idea how exactly you’d be able to break free from the plotline of you and Hyunjin getting together nor did you know what would happen if you did. You had always followed the path that was in front of you without question, the possibility of getting to the end of the story and escaping the book you were in had been the only thing you were reaching for.

But if you strayed from that somehow and got with Jeongin against the author’s wishes, what exactly would that entail for you? Would you still be forced together with Hyunjin? Or would the author somehow eradicate Jeongin’s existence altogether?

Big bold quotes appeared over Jeongin and Hyunjin’s heads, your next scripted words to continue the plot blasted right in your face like flashing headlights. You read them silently to yourself for a moment, glancing from Hyunjin to Jeongin with a skeptical frown on your face.

I can’t wait for tomorrow, Hyunjin!

What a simple phrase to repeat, a normal response in the situation you were in. You and Hyunjin were fated to be with each other, destined to fall in love no matter what odds were against the two of you. But… you just weren’t feeling it honestly. Who would have guessed that the obstacles that stood in between you and Hyunjin becoming a couple was yourself, the main protagonist, after all?

With a deep breath, you stood up from your seat and flagged down Hyunjin and Jeongin to get their attention. Jeongin was the first to notice, catching your moving figure in the corner of his eye and hitting the boy’s shoulder to get his attention. Hyunjin turned around shortly after, his hair whipping in the wind and landing perfectly on his shoulders thanks to his typical love interest privileges.

He smiled at you, his wide and grand smile that should have made any person fall out in adoration. You raised your hand to wave at the boys as you spoke, “Hi… Jeongin.”

Hyunjin’s infatuated gaze fell into one of confusion, his face twisting as he looked back at the friend you had called out to.

Jeongin looked just as confused as Hyunjin, unsure of whether or not he could respond to you. Though it was a little too late to not answer now, you had already made eye contact with each other. Not responding would be seen as rude to his friend’s future partner after all. “Hi, Y/N” He replied, his words seemingly unscripted from what the original author had intended. Perhaps he wasn’t supposed to say a word to you in this scene but that didn’t matter now.

You had taken the first step into straying off the path that was laid out for you since you woke up in this book’s storyline, and now you were going to run for it. Run as fast as you can to change the story to what you wanted, a story where you can have Jeongin all for yourself, and not what the author had intended for you.

After all, you're not the protagonist that the author had intended to write. You are you’re own person with your own wants and desires, you were going to get what you wanted whether the author liked it or not.