#I’ve been randomly going ‘…So I know I’ve said this like a million times before

[soulsxng]

Sometimes, a person allows me to geek out about dog training/behavior/nutrition stuff a little bit (because they asked me for advice/help), and my brain just latches onto it for the rest of the day. And then I’m just going on long winded dog related info dumps completely out of nowhere to literally anybody in the room.

[m1ckeyb3rry]

Hiya hiya! Once again congratulations on 500! I was wondering if I could request a fic with Isagi and handholding! Idk hand holding sounds very romantic so I would love to see how you’ll write it!

── PATHWAYS

Synopsis: You go on a walk with your boyfriend while he’s on a break from the intense training of Blue Lock.

Event Masterlist

Pairing: Isagi x Reader

Chapter Word Count: 1.1k

Content Warnings: fluff, isagi is lowkey a simp, slight rin and nagi slander (i love them though i promise)

A/N: EEK i’m sorry this took me a sec anon!! i’ve never written for isagi before so this was def smth new which is why it took me a bit to get in the right headspace. i hope it’s okay for you <3

Additional: part of my 500 follower event! see the event description and rules to make a request of your own.

It was colder outside than you had expected. Isagi, who was wearing a coat and had a scarf wrapped around his neck, didn’t seem bothered by the temperature, but as for you, you were miserably trying to hide your shivers, pulling your sweater tighter around yourself to disguise it. He had told you that it was chilly, and you had ignored his warning, so it was now your burden to bear.

“I haven’t seen you in so long,” Isagi said, white clouds forming in the air from the heat of his breath. “I missed you a lot the entire time I was there.”

“I missed you, too,” you said. “I know we were able to talk a few times on your one friend’s phone, but it wasn’t the same.”

Isagi wrinkled his nose. “I’m sorry I wasn’t able to get my own back. I really tried my best. I wanted to talk to you as much as I could, to make up for our physical distance.”

“It’s okay. The fact that you were willing to take care of all of your teammate’s sweaty, gross laundry just to get the chance to call me for a couple of minutes means more to me than anything,” you said, bumping your shoulder against his as you walked along the side of the dirt path connecting your house to the nearest park.

“That was definitely a sacrifice,” he said, gagging from just the memory. “I’d do it again for you, but it was really horrible, Y/N. It’s bad enough dealing with my own clothes after matches, but adding Nagi’s to the mix…it was brutal, to say the least.”

“My poor boyfriend,” you said. “I’m so lucky to have someone who’s willing to endure so much for me. I must’ve been a really good person in my last life.”

“I’m the lucky one,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. “To be honest, I was kind of scared you’d find someone else while I was gone. It would only make sense, right? How could a girl as beautiful as you not have a million other options? It would be pretty easy for you to forget about me and move on.”

“Would you forget about me and move on if the roles were reversed?” you said, your teeth chattering. Isagi’s eyebrows shot up, almost disappearing behind his dark hair.

“No way!” he said, shrugging off his coat and draping it around your shoulders. “I’d never, ever do that. I still can’t believe I’m dating you at all!”

“You’re so goofy,” you said. “Hey, don’t give me this. Won’t you get cold?”

“Nah, I’m tough. What kind of number-one striker gets defeated by some wind?” he said. You hummed appreciatively, zipping up the large jacket and rejoicing in the warmth it instantly provided you with.

“Number-one striker, and the hero of Blue Lock, I’m told,” you said. His cheeks turned pink.

“That, too,” he said.

“It’s all everyone at school talks about. One day, you just randomly disappeared, and no one but me knew where you had gone. Then suddenly, you were on TV, making the winning goal in one of the most exciting matches of soccer any of us had ever seen! I feel like the girlfriend of a celebrity,” you said.

“You should get used to it,” he said. “I’m only going to get better from here. I’ll be a World Cup winner next, and since you’re stuck with me, you’re going to have to deal with everything that that entails.”

“Stuck with you?” you said. He reached for your hand, squeezing it tightly, holding up your interlaced fingers so that he could admire them.

“Do you see your hand?” he said, very seriously. 

“I see it,” you said.

“And you see mine?” he continued.

“Mhm,” you said. As always, his were warm, compared to the iciness of your extremities. He liked to joke that it meant the two of you were made for each other, only able to reach the perfect temperature when you were together.

“That’s us,” he said. “We’re going to be like that forever.”

“Goofy and cheesy? What a lethal combination,” you said, shaking your head.

His palm was callused and rough against yours, a proof of how hard he worked. He was always like that, you had noticed even upon first meeting him, always doing the best he could in any given situation, making up for any disadvantages with the sheer force of his will alone. It was nice to have that tangible reminder of who he was pressed against you, so you made no move to let go of his hand even after his little demonstration had concluded.

“I know,” he said. “And my jokes are really bad. But you like that about me, right?”

“I do,” you said. “Your jokes aren’t terrible, though. Don’t be so hard on yourself.”

“They make you laugh, so I guess they can’t be that bad,” he said. “Although everyone in Blue Lock hated them. One time, my friend Bachira threw a shoe at me for being unfunny, and Rin Itoshi called me a lukewarm NPC for trying to cheer him up with a pun.”

“If anyone is an NPC, it’s him, just for unironically calling someone that,” you said. “They just don’t understand you, Isagi. It’s okay; true art is never appreciated by the masses.”

“That’s right. As long as you’re happy, I don’t mind if they detest me,” he said. You pressed a kiss to his cheek.

“Thank you,” you said.

“Should we get sour gummies at the convenience store? It’s been forever since I had some,” he said, his entire face turning red. It was funny — he would declare his love to you in the most cliched of ways and entirely on a whim, but if you ever reciprocated, he would shut down entirely. Like he said, he really still couldn’t believe that you both were actually together, that in fact you had been together for months now, and so he often acted like a little kid with his first crush whenever he was around you.

“Sounds like a good idea. I’ve been craving some myself,” you said.

“Okay! Let’s go. I’ll race you!” he said, taking off at a run, though contrary to his challenging words, he pulled you along, careful to keep your hands connected as you giggled and stumbled after him.

You had missed him, so much more than you could ever verbalize. You had spent every day that he was gone thinking about him, his spontaneity, his wide smile and his kindness, the gentle way he always spoke to you, how easily taking care of you came to him.

Running towards the convenience store alongside him, you held onto his hand tightly, as much for balance as because you couldn’t imagine letting go. 

[uraniumwriting]

flowers smell sweet until they wither

Another prompt fill for @flashfictionfridayofficial , this time for the prompt "Gifted Violets"

Today, we go to Halli Reed once again, with a lesson about plants and taking breaks.

~~~~

Halli walked into the AE Lounge with a stack of books in her arms and deep bags under her eyes.

Before she had left her old life, she believed that the busiest she would ever be was when she took Advanced Placement Chemistry and Biology at the same time as a high school sophomore. Just a year later, though, she realized that she was dead wrong.

Two tests on etiquette, three quizzes on intergalactic history, and memorization checks on a million different things, all in the next week. And that was if Jason didn’t decide to spring something else on the group “to keep their senses sharp.”

How was she supposed to sleep ever again if this was now her life?

“You like the flowers?” Zac’s voice shocked Halli out of her thinking.

He sat at the large table in the center of the room, the one with actual chairs instead of the beanbags that were piled in the corners.

On that table was a vase of purple flowers.

“Where did those come from?” Halli slowly walked past the table. She preferred to sit in the corners, where she could more easily ignore the blankness of the walls that should’ve been filled with posters and other signs of teenage life.

“I joined in with the Gardening Club here for the day and brought them to share.” He gestured for her to come over. “They smell really sweet, you know.”

She squinted at him. The flowers were certainly too dark to be lavender, so all Halli could imagine them smelling like was pollen.

“I think I’m fine,” she finally said. “I’m behind on studying already, and Jason’s going to burn me alive if I don’t get back on schedule.”

“You nearly die, and he’s worried about you taking quizzes?” Zac scoffed and ran his fingers through his still-shaggy brown hair. “Just a few days ago you were in the infirmary, Halli.”

“I know, but this school isn’t afraid to throw people out on the street and you know it.” Halli frowned and flopped down on one of the bean bag chairs. “I can’t be weak if I want to survive here, and that means I have to focus on studying as much as possible before curfew.”

“They’re violets, by the way.”

“What?”

Zac gestured to the flowers. “These. Violets. You remember what flowers are, right?”

“You’re acting like I don’t go outside anymore.” Halli opened one of her textbooks to the chapter “Honeypots and Sleeper Agents.”

“I’m just trying to make sure you don’t forget who you are.” Slowly, Zac stood and walked over to the corner Halli had settled herself in. “That gas leak must’ve been terrifying for you, and I’m here for you.”

“The gas leak was nothing. There’s no permanent damage, and I’m not going to randomly drop dead.”

“And what about your mind?” To Halli’s annoyance, Zac sat on the beanbag next to her. “Aren’t you scared? I mean, if I were in your shoes, I wouldn’t trust this place to protect me.”

“Well, good thing you aren’t in my shoes, then.” Halli did everything she could to focus on the words on the page. At the very least, the memorization checks would be informal, but Jason had already lectured the importance of knowing how to spot espionage around your own espionage.

“You know, why don’t the two of us go to the parkour course tomorrow night?” Zac asked. “Being in the books all of the time can’t be good for you. Moving around a bit always makes me feel better, and we could do some of that team bonding everyone waxes poetically about.”

“I’ve already promised someone else for tomorrow.” Halli shook her head. “Maybe I shouldn’t even do that, anyway. I know the older kids always study later on Saturday nights. I need their help.”

“No.” He grabbed her wrist a bit too quickly for her liking. “You don’t need their help. You need rest. Other than you being in the infirmary, how much have you really rested since you’ve been here?”

“Leave me alone, Zac.” She ripped her wrist away from him. “It must be great that you sleep well even with the idea of flunking out hanging over your head, but I have nothing to go to if I lose this. I’ll rest when I’m not in danger of becoming homeless, okay?”

“But—”

“Leave. Me. Alone.” Halli turned her back to Zac and curled up into a ball. Her face was probably as red as her hair, and tears pricked her eyes, but she couldn’t let her emotions get the best of her. It was difficult to tell just how close she was to flunking out at any given moment, which meant she would just have to work herself to the bone until she was safe.

Was it fun? No. But was it better than being thrown on the streets with nothing to her name but disgrace, or worse? Definitely.

“Don’t say I didn’t warn you,” Zac muttered before he stood.

“Burning out is better than them shooting me,” Halli called back, not bothering to disguise the disgust in her voice.

Thankfully, Zac didn’t start an argument, but instead he grabbed his things and stormed out of the room. Only the violets remained on the table, though Halli eventually noticed the fuzz floating in the vase’s water.

They won’t last very long, she thought.

Halli studied until the curfew bell, but that still wasn’t enough. So, the next evening, she once again opened the door to the AE Lounge with a thicker stack of books in her arms and deeper bags under her eyes.

Instead of violets in the vase, though, something unlike anything she’d ever seen before entangled the whole table and reached out toward everything in sight.

The creature was purple and white, with slimy tentacles that seemed to grow with each passing second. Its body popped and creaked, and though Halli couldn’t see any eyes, the creature shifted as if it noticed her.

On its tentacles were razor-sharp claws, and all of them were flexed toward her.

Halli dropped everything she had been carrying. Honeypot.

Before she could open her mouth to scream, someone grabbed her from behind.

[where-dreamers-go]

"Future Treasure Seekers" Riley Poole x Reader

(A/N: And we’re back with the third/last prequel to the Riley Poole series. This one happens after “Lunch Rescue” and before Part One “Charlotte”. Here we have what happens when Ben talks with Reader about their feelings for Riley and Ben’s theory about the treasure’s first clue.

I tagged the same people from the series, I hope that’s okay. Some have changed though..

Also: HAPPY 2,000 FOLLOWERS!!! <3

Warnings: Tiny bit of angst in beginning. Fluff. Mutual pining. Use of (Y/N) for your name. Two different point of views.

Word Count: 3,491 words)

~~~

Adult life could be anything if given the specific circumstances. The good, the bad, and the neutral.

Living next door to your best friend tended to be an enlightening addition to living in an apartment complex. It not only saved you two on phone bills, but also a quick travel distance when wanting to catch up with the other’s life.

“Better than the frozen meal you had yesterday?” You quipped from the other end of the small table.

“Yeah.” Ben admitted, “The edges were burnt.”

“I hate when that happens. Or when I randomly find a piece of corn in something.”

“That brownie?”

“It was weird. Never having that again. I’ll make my own.”

Chuckling, Ben took a sip of his drink. “At least you know what you like now.”

“True.”

“And you’ve learned a lot. Learned about yourself.”

You nodded before frowning slightly.

Where’s he going with this? You wondered suspiciously, hesitant to take another bite of dinner.

“There’s still a lot out there you haven’t experienced.”

“Why do I feel like you’re going to give me a big brother talk of life advice?” You asked, fully suspicious of your friend.

“Because I am.” Ben stated firmly. “You clearly like Riley.”

“Ben.” You set down the utensil.

“I like to see my friends happy.” He continued.

“Me too, but—”

“What are you afraid of?”

You sighed, slouching back into the chair. Time to be honest. “I don’t want to ruin anything. As it is, I’m having to learn that getting older means drifting away from friends I’ve made in school. I don’t want to push him away or make things awkward times a million. I can’t—,” you swallowed. “I don’t want to risk losing Riley because of . . . me.”

Quiet filled the space at the small dining table. You could see the twinge of sadness in Ben’s eyes.

“You’re a good friend, (Y/N). Maybe too good?” Ben inquired.

Staring down at your unfinished dinner, you grumbled somberly.

Maybe if I was brave enough, I’d do something.

. . .

Attempting to put on a light jacket while simultaneously slipping on your shoes tended to take longer in the mornings. As early as it was, you still tried. One elbow bracing by the front door, one shoe refusing to cooperate, and growing determination was how your morning began.

It only became odd with an urgent series of familiar knocks from the other side of the front door.

What the—?

Peering through the peephole, your confusion remained steady at the sight of Ben Gates.

It’s not even eight o’ clock yet, you thought as you unlocked and opened the door.

“Ben?”

“(Y/N),” he greeted brightly. “I think I figured it out.”

You opened your mouth to response, but he was just getting started.

“The Charlotte. It’s not a place and it’s certainly not just a thing. The Charlotte is a ship. A ship that was sailing through the Atlantic years ago.”

“It’s a ship?”

“Yeah. I’ve been researching to know where it was built, what it was supposedly carrying, and it’s destination.”

You shoved your foot into your shoe. “So, where’d it port?”

Ben stuck up his finger and announced, “That’s just it. The Charlotte never did.”

“Well, dang. Okay, um…”

“We just need to figure out where she landed.”

“Ben,” you said firmly. “I have to go in to work today.”

His eyes widened in realization. “Right. Of course.” Ben nodded, thoughts no doubt rushing through his mind. “I’ll call Riley. He’ll work it out on the computer and we’ll let you know everything when you’re off work.”

“Sounds like a plan.” You smiled. “Hopefully my workday goes by fast.”

Ben returned your smile and said with every ounce of determination and hope, “We’re going to find the Charlotte.”

. . .

The afternoon had been full of excited chatter and theories flying around.

Too bad I couldn’t have been here sooner, Riley thought.

Sitting at the small dining table in Ben’s apartment, Riley Poole waited for the results on his laptop. Tracking models took time, but Riley’s was up-to-date. He pushed up his glasses on his nose and waited patiently.

Much more patiently than his friend, Ben, who stood looking over his shoulder in anticipation. His gaze glued onto the tracking model as it moved North into the Arctic Circle.

Looming with crossed arms and no commentary, stood Ian by the kitchen counter.

I’m not sure if it’s comforting or alarming that he’s quiet. Maybe both, if possible.

Half a minute more and the tracking model stopped and delivered its results.

Breaths were held.

Riley blinked.

“There she is,” Ben announced in awe.

“And no one even knows its there?” Riley inquired, squinting at the screen.

“Let’s hope not.” Ian said.

“We have to go.” Ben urged. “All of us.”

“Certainly.”

“Okay, but how are we going to afford proper equipment? For the arctic?” Riley asked.

“I’ll take care of the costs,” Ian announced confidently and shared a smile with Ben. Although each smile was vastly different, one seemingly smug and the other grateful.

“Thank you.” Ben said genuinely.

How much money does he have? The ticket prices alone could be questionable. Then again, I don’t know how much equipment we’ll need. Or if we can get it there. Riley sat back in the chair.

“Okay.” Ben exhaled. Taking quick steps over to a less cluttered part of the table, Ben picked up his cell phone and started dialing.

“Who are you calling?” Ian raised an eyebrow as he took a closer look at Riley’s computer.

“(Y/N).” Ben revealed simply.

“Ben, (Y/N)’s at work.” Riley reminded his excited friend. “The exhibition is still new.”

“I know,” he waved off his friend gently. “It’s close enough.”

(Y/N)’s going to flip when they find out we tracked down a ship, Riley thought with a growing smile. Or run around.

Phone at his ear, Ben waited for a response while moving about the space.

Glancing at his laptop again, Riley checked the time.

They don’t work late today, do they?

“(Y/N).” Ben’s voice filled the apartment with his enthusiasm. Yet that did not stop the man’s feet as he crossed from one side the room to the next. “It’s about Charlotte.”

Riley smirked, fully knowing that there was no way you wouldn’t know what the phone call was all about.

“Okay. I won’t.”

Riley spoke loudly towards Ben, “How fast can you come home? Ben is pacing.”

Ben stopped abruptly and gave Riley a complex expression that made him suddenly self-conscious of his question.

Was that weird to ask? Riley wondered as he awaited your reply.

“They’ll be back soon,” Ben confirmed with a grin that soon dropped, “and . . . I wasn’t pacing the whole floor. No.”

Riley chuckled just as Ian covered his mouth to suppress a laugh.

Treasure, he thought. It could be anything.

Riley looked over to his laptop screen feeling more free and like himself than he ever had. For, he had helped and contributed.

Ben’s theory has to be right.

. . .

Everything’s going to be all right. You got this.

Being rushed usually involved tardiness and unwanted appointments. Strict deadlines as well.

Shouldering open your apartment door, you had a building excitement. One you knew would likely be tiny in comparison to your best friend’s next door.

After practically throwing your things onto the coffee table, you pocketed your keys and cell phone before heading right back out into the hall.

Stepping up to Ben’s door with a raised hand, it opened before you could knock.

“We know where the Charlotte could be,” Ben announced holding the door wide open.

You hadn’t seen him that happy before, practically about to giggle in glee. If Ben was one to giggle that was.

“Hi to you too.” You chuckled as you walked inside.

Ben’s apartment had a buzz of activity even with only two other people present. Ian stood off to the side, seemingly waiting, and Riley sat on the couch with a bright smile.

“Hi, Ian,” you greeted. “Has Ben filled your ears with enough history today?”

“Almost,” the man smirked. His expression could be read as both amused and confident with everything that had transpired that day.

“We’re one step closer.” Ben said after he closed the door and walked towards Ian. “I just know it.”

“Who would be silly enough to doubt you.” You added. “Certainly not me.” You made your way towards the small dining table where Riley sat with his laptop.

“Not me,” Riley raised his hand.

“And I’m guessing you helped?”

“With the computer. Yeah.”

“Yeah. Big deal,” you said and went in for a hug that Riley almost stood up for. “That’s awesome.”

“Not as big as when we actually find treasure.” Riley stated with a smile as you pulled out of the hug and sat in a chair beside him. “It could be worth millions.”

“If it’s a ship, it could have historical artifacts. Not just including the ship itself.” You said with a grin. “And you managed to find it on the computer?”

“I have a tracking model,” Riley gestured to his laptop.

“Oh dang.”

“We’ll be going to the Arctic Circle.” Ben revealed to you. “An area without much activity.”

“Or any at all,” Riley murmured.

“With who knows how many layers of snow and ice,” you added.

“Which is why we need a team.” Ian announced.

Right, you thought and mentally figured the four of you were not enough.

“I have people in mind.”

That’s convenient, you thought as you looked between the confident Ian and the ever-grinning Ben. And makes this a lot easier. Hopefully.

“But…uh. This is happening soon?” You asked, unsure of the chances of your participation. “Or do we not know yet?”

Ben turned to you with a firm point of a finger. “You’re coming too.”

“I have work. The exhibit has barely been up for over a week. Wouldn’t it be weird if I just took off?”

“You’re great at what you do. They have to let you have time off. The exhibit is perfect. They can handle a few days without you. Hopefully.” Riley added, “They can email someone else.”

Overwhelmed with his compliments, you bumped his knee with yours.

“Thank you.”

Turning at the sound of Ben’s chuckle, you caught Ian rolling his eyes. It only made you overtly aware of your knee still touching Riley’s.

You tore your gaze away from everyone and grumbled in thought, If I’m going to do this… I’m going to have to juggle some things around or something. Without letting people know specifics.

“But, you can make it work?” Ben asked, fully attentive.

Feeling yourself internally caving to the idea of discovering history, you said, “If anything, I haven’t called out sick in months. I could use sick days. I’ll talk with them tomorrow or…when we know for sure when we’re going.”

“Excellent,” Ian said with a determined nod. “I’ll make some calls.”

. . . 

Things were moving fast. Tickets were bought and plans were made. Phone calls were more common and expected between friends.

Check list in hand, you sat on your bed thoughtfully. Curtains closed to conceal the city lights of the city. Luggage sitting on the floor as other items were strategically scattered in your room.

Less than a week stood between you and the possibility of discovering treasure. That left you with much to settle and organize.

Thank goodness you weren’t doing it alone.

“You have a good hat, right? To keep you warm?” You asked into the phone.

“Yeah. Found it in the pocket of my coat.” Riley replied.

“Good place to find it.”

“Speaking of finding things. You have extra batteries, right? Extra film?”

“I have some somewhere,” you muttered, hopping off the bed to venture out of your bedroom and into a makeshift office. Shuffling through a set of drawers took a few moments. “Yup. There’s the right kind too.”

“Nice. Are those from your storm prep stash?”

“Yeah. I’ll get more when we come back.”

“From the Arctic Circle.”

You walked back into your bedroom and placed the pack of batteries by your camera bag.

“So much for traveling extra light. Snow…lots of layers and just-in-case items.”

“Like a bag for all of my chargers.”

“Extra long socks and snacks.”

“Mittens and gloves.”

“And we’ll be wearing most of it. I don’t know what we’ll be carrying.”

“Whatever Ian supplies, I guess,” Riley muttered. “He acted as if getting everything was easy.”

“For him it might.”

“How much money does he have?”

“Don’t know. Don’t think we’ll ever find out.” You stated while marking over a checkmark on your list again. “Equipment alone is a lot.”

“In the thousands, probably. Ben said something about us not having to worry about walking. What’s with that? Did Ian hire dog sled teams too?”

“I have no idea, but Ben’s happy.”

“I’m happy.”

“I know.” You smiled and set your list aside. “And it’s really cool that you found it with the tracking model.”

“Well, uh, if it’s right then we’ll all be shoving snow to get to whatever’s in the ship.”

“It’ll be a lot of work.”

“Hopefully not too much.” Riley added, “We’re looking for treasure not doing hard labor. Then we can spend it however we want.”

However we want, you mused over his words. You had no idea what you would buy first if rewarded with money for your treasure seeking efforts.

“Speaking of spending. Do you think Ian will treat everyone to food?” You asked, glancing at your secret savings in an old notebook.

“Uh. Let’s not push our luck. No matter how nice that’d be.”

“I’ll bring snacks then.”

. . .

Late afternoon light filled corners of your apartment. Time was ticking down to when you would all leave to search for the Charlotte. An air of change circled through the air.

Even your day at work had felt different. The feeling continued inside your apartment where Riley had left his bags in your spare room.

Definitely different, you thought as you made sure you had your basic essentials. Keys, check. Phone and IDs, got them.

“Why do you have to go back?” Riley asked, standing behind your couch.

You tilted your head.

“I mean—you just got off work.” He clarified quickly.

“I just need to give them a few things from my office. I would have done that earlier, but I didn’t know they needed that too. Museum stuff…no big deal, but I’ll be back in no time.” You twisted your keyring between your fingers. “Make yourself at home. The money for the pizza is on the counter if they beat me here.”

Riley nodded. Blue eyes following your movements to the front door.

And it’ll give me time to wrap my mind around Riley staying in my apartment tonight.

. . . 

Looking over his electronics, all were either plugged in to charge or packed away. Riley was thankful that the outlet by the spare bed was visible and connected to a surge protector.

They really know how to use their space, Riley thought as he looked about the spare room. An office, bedroom, and probably storage area. He eyed the closet beside a desk. Not wanting to intrude in your space, Riley kept his distance. Yet he could clearly see the setup around the desk with a calendar stuck to the wall with important dates marked in various colors. This is definitely theirs.

Out of the many times Riley had visited your apartment, he had never been inside alone. Being surrounded by everything that had your specific touch to it was intriguing. Then again, Riley had never been hours away from starting a search for treasure and he certainly had never been in the spare room knowing full well that was where he would sleep for the night.

Sleeping over. Riley thought as he wiped his palms over his jeans and exhaled slowly. It’s just Ben’s place has no room. And he’ll probably be on the phone with Ian every other hour. It’s fine. It’s just us then we leave in the morning. Riley swallowed. And I’ve never had breakfast here either. It’s fine.

Quiet hadn’t fully settled in your apartment. The television was set to an animal documentary. Riley hadn’t thought of changing it even as he sat down to watch.

He had to keep his mind busy, for the moment, away from the treasure and you. Waiting was all he really could do and not just because you called an order for pizza.

Blinking, Riley refocused on the show.

“ . . . now grown, he will do his best to attract a mate.”

Riley threw his head back into the couch cushion and uttered, “You and me both, buddy.”

Ben better not give me that talk again after this, he thought as he bounced his leg anxiously. Who am I kidding? He probably has one prepared.

A knock on the door startled Riley off of the couch.

The pizza had arrived.

. . .

A jingle of keys and a shove, you walked back into your apartment. The smell of pizza clinging to the air.

“Hey,” Riley stood from the couch, “did you get everything done?”

“Uh. Yeah. Everything’s good.” You answered and closed the door. Words left you oddly from feeling a little warm at the sight of Riley in your home and comfortable. You could get used to that image. “So…where are you hiding the pizza? I can smell it.”

“Oven. Keeping all the heat from escaping.” He headed straight for the small kitchen area.

“Thank you.” Setting your keys and such down on the kitchen counter, you watched Riley retrieve the pizza box.

“You’re thanking me?” Riley lifted the cardboard lid. “I’d be bunking with a sleep-deprived Ben if it weren’t for you.”

“Who says I’m not sleep-deprived?”

“I can tell.”

Smiling to yourself, you grabbed two plates from an overhead cabinet.

“For one,” Riley continued, “you’re talking coherently.”

“We’re about to eat pizza. So I don’t know how long that’ll last.”

With a quick smile, Riley distributed a couple of slices for the both of you and headed to the small dining table nearby. “But seriously, thank you.”

“It’s not a problem. You’re always welcome here.” You said and quickly added, “Treasure or no treasure.”

“Hopefully we find something.” Riley said after a bite of pizza.

You nodded, thoughtful.

“Even a small fortune.”

Laughing in agreement, you stated, “It’d be a great addition to my vacation.”

Blue eyes peered up. “You used your vacation days?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s great! The exhibition will be up for a few months anyway.” Riley exclaimed. “Maybe we’ll find something you could add to a new exhibition.”

“That would be really cool and a bonus considering I don’t exactly have a substitute for my position, but it’ll be fine.”

Both agreeing, you returned to eating. Thankfully the pizza hadn’t gone to room temperature while you were on route back.

The general silence was comforting. Perhaps it was the busy day or the adventure planned ahead of you, but you liked sitting down with Riley without needing to fill in the space with words.

Don’t go off on imagination overdrive while he’s here. Just eat your pizza. You thought to yourself, glad Ben wasn’t there to add commentary for just once. At least Riley’s comfortable here. I just gotta go over my list again after cleaning up. Set out a pair of socks for the flight.

“Hey.” Riley’s voice interrupted your thoughts.

You glanced up.

“You have everything packed except your phone. You haven’t forgotten anything.”

You sat up straighter. “Did I say something out loud?”

“No.” A smile curved his lips. “You had that overthinking look.”

. . .

Nighttime was a particular thing. It gave freedom to how one used their time away from work and offered a more suitable atmosphere for sleep.

Walking out of the bathroom and ready for sleep, you found Riley asleep on the couch. The television was still on and hushed forest sounds emitted from it.

I guess he didn’t head to bed after all. You mused, or I took that long in the bathroom.

Quietly, you knelt down by the couch. “Riley?” You touched his shoulder gently.

“Hmm?” Drowsy eyes glanced your way.

“Time for bed.”

Nodding and closing his eyes again, Riley pushed himself up. Then, with shuffling feet, he headed away from you and the couch.

You watched on.

“Left, Riley,” you instructed as he had been walking towards your room. You covered your own chuckle while Riley redirected himself to the spare room. “Sweet dreams.”

And don’t think too much about where he was heading, you thought to yourself and knowing full well that would be an extremely difficult task to follow through. Riley being adorable and finding treasure among friends, this could be fun. I might be too excited to sleep. Anything can happen.

~~~

(If you love my writings and want to support me, I have a Ko-Fi where you can buy me a coffee. I would be eternally grateful.

Best wishes and happy reading.)

~~~~~

DreamerDragon Tags: @cubedtriangle

Riley Poole Tags: @darkenwolfy @wesleeporstudy @yearning-warmth @thecaptaingingersnap @nervousfandom

**Let me know if you would like to be tagged in insert readers, either through replies, ask, or message.**

[winns-stuff]

LO RANT:

Can we just talk about how incredibly insensitive and blissfully ignorant some fans are about trigger warnings for these very heavy and touchy subjects? Listen I’ve never been so disappointed in my damn life about this stuff, how are you going to read a comic about all of this heavy stuff that happens to people in real life yet also want people who’ve been affected by said topics to shut up or disengage from the comic completely. Y’all are giving this grown woman too much coddling at this point and it’s distressing, Rachel is a grown woman and it’s not like anyone forced her to put these topics into her story she understands (I hope but I say this loosely) that these discussions can be harder to experience for some people rather than others which is why trigger warnings exist and why you give your millions of fans who all come from very DIFFERING experiences than your own a trigger warning to warn them so their day won’t be demolished.

People have a right to call that shit out and if you don’t need the trigger warning good for you, stop acting like these people are insulting the comic by asking for one. It’s not like people are asking her to make a whole around the world trip in one day they are simply just asking for a damn trigger warning. I’m getting so extremely tired of Lore Olympus fans still not getting or even trying to understand this, these people understand that this comic handles serious things but just because Rachel has been “forgetting” the trigger warnings and they don’t want her allowing her fans to go head first into disturbing content doesn’t mean they want their hand held. Also, for the people saying that they should know when those scenes come up you make no sense anyways because you really can barely tell when scenes like these are coming without a trigger warning. The Demeter thing took me by surprise, so did Hera’s story, so did Demeter’s backstory, so did Hades’ shitty apology, etc. The amount of times that I got blindsided by serious topics such as those being dropped into the comic is way too fucking many to count so please don’t try and hide behind that excuse. There’s millions of fans out there who don’t expect shit like this just because you’ve been studying Lore Olympus and got down the mannerisms of the characters before something disturbing or traumatic is coming up doesn’t mean others do.

I’m sorry if I come off rash or meaner in this post I’m just extremely over this whole thing. I am a person that needs trigger warnings as well and last night I watched a video, thinking it would be funny, that ended up harming me. It was a “health” video and it was basically someone telling the viewers that regular human things happening to you is a sign of a painful death, I remember being so mortified that I felt my blood running cold and my heart pounding in my ears. If you didn’t know I’m very anxious, paranoid, and an overall hypochondriac so I don’t do well with shit like that coming up and randomly making itself known. I know many people probably wouldn’t care but I just wanted to let you guys know why trigger warnings are so useful and important to those that need them. Last night my body entered flight or fight mode just by that video alone and I was absolutely panicked, I was in so much distress and it was all because of one video. It only takes one chapter without a trigger warning to trigger worser things than that and we should all be mindful of that fact.

Again, sorry if all of this is aggressive or mean I didn’t mean anything by it I just wish that fans did better. It’s sad seeing them put down others for genuine concerns and it’s even sadder that Rachel does not do anything about it. There’s only so much toxic positivity you can fill up before there’s no real community left and there’s way too many fans who deserve at least a trigger warning with these things it really doesn’t take long to make and it could genuinely save people from these experiences such as mine.

Moral of the story is if you don’t need trigger warnings don’t bag on people who do, they’re not sensitive you just don’t share the same experiences as them and you don’t know what their background is at all. Be mindful that everyone isn’t you, respectfully.

[gobbluthbutagirl]

lol so like 100000 years ago, like literally all the way back in MARCH when i was still living in my shithole apartment, i ordered stuff from some company that i had assumed was legit, and i had ordered it to be delivered to my dad’s house because i knew i was about to move out of that shithole and their website said to allow 2-3 weeks for processing before it shipped. well. 2-3 weeks went by, then 2-3 months, and it never shipped. and i noticed some stuff was off about the whole thing, like in the shopify app you couldn’t actually browse the products like you can with literally every other shop, you have to go to their website directly to even see their shit. and because of this there’s also no shop rating in the shopify app like there is with literally every other shop. so i’m like, ok, whatever, i got scammed, and i’m out like $100, but i have other shit going on right now too so i don’t really care that much about that. and i did report it to shopify a couple times like, hey, i never got my shit, but obviously nothing ever came of that. and i’m also separately having a weird problem with my email address where it’s like 14 years old and the provider has actually been defunct for a while now and i literally don’t even know if that’s actually why but ANYWAY every time i try to send an email from my email app it just bounces and doesn’t send and i can’t even log into my account on their website either because the 2-factor authentication they have on there literally does not even work, like it sends me a code and then i put in the code and it’s like, wrong code! even though i know for a fact it’s the right code.

and so anyway all this to say i couldn’t email the company directly either so i was just like whatever. but then i also didn’t want to try to get my bank to refund the charges either because i was like, what if they do eventually ship it? and obviously they wouldn’t do ever do that if i managed to get my money back, and i did want that stuff clearly because otherwise i wouldn’t have ordered it. so i just kind of forgot about it for a while and made a million other online purchases on shopify since then all of which i’ve had zero issues with. so it was just kind of this thing in the background that i was just choosing to not deal with.

but then fast-forward to today. the “order placed” just randomly changed to “shipped.” and there’s no tracking number and i never got any type of email saying it had shipped. and the only time i’ve ever had a package not have a tracking number is when i’ve ordered overseas from the uk and this company is ALLEGEDLY based in the la area so i’m just like…lol. and i don’t know at what point this happened but i tried to click on their website today after this and the domain literally isn’t even registered anymore. so like again…lol. and i’m thinking either this package hasn’t actually shipped and will not actually ship and it was just marked as shipped so they don’t get in trouble for never having shipped it at the six-month mark which is coming up really soon OR if it did ship it did NOT ship from los angeles and instead shipped from somewhere overseas(presumably china) and could i guess actually theoretically arrive at some point within the next month. which of course will be ~6 months after i ordered it. which AGAIN…lol!

[wywyyearns]

Written in the Stars.

(Here I go trying to post my writing again. I revised this piece I wrote a few years ago.)

He was out later than he planned. Most don’t spend hours at a bookstore. He wore a black tee shirt and blue jeans, with a checkered flannel hanging loosely open as he walk. The cafe he settled in had since closed and chased the only two patrons out of the area.

He had made small glances at this girl who looks to be his age for the past hour or so. She’s roughly five-foot-one with dark hair that drops to her shoulders. She had these deep, mysterious eyes that kept his attention locker. She’s dressed in a black long sleeve that’s exposing her shoulder somewhat. It’s covered by a dark thin jacket. Her jeans tight in the right places.

“You know, you could say hello.”

He snapped out of his thoughts as he walked and noticed that she’s beside him now as they both reach the door. His face flushed a faint pink as he opened the door for her. “After you.” She grind as she walked past him and then stopped abruptly as he followed “Hello.” She greeted.

“Hello.” He plainly spoke and she giggled.

“Gee, how long is it going to take you to ask me name then?” She teased.

His mind whirled as this beautiful girl spoke to him. Not once in his life had he been confident enough to approach someone like this. It never happens. The most might be admiration from afar toward the occasional girl and wondering about saying something, anything. This was surprising. “I’m Lee. What’s your name?”

“Randi.” She briefly stated. Then started to walk with her hands in the pockets of her jacket, gesturing for him to follow. They’re certainly heading away from the parking lot. He decide following a pretty girl might be worth some risk.

“Did you buy a book or anything?” He asked to fill the silence. He noticed she wasn’t carrying anything. She shrugged as they walked beside each other. “I couldn’t find a story I liked, so I chose to make one instead.”

If possible his face turned another shade of pink. She sounded so bold and sure of herself. He clearly was not. “What do you mean?”

She pursed her lips and reached for his hand to lead them into an abrupt left turn. He looked ahead and saw a pier within view. The lighthouse at the end shining brightly. She lead him with purpose as they walk in silence to the edge. The waves crashing gently.

She lets go of his hand and looks up to him. She was much closer than he would have expected. “What’s your sign?”

He paused for a moment, curious on what she’s thinking. “I’m a Virgo.”

She nodded briefly and looked up to the stars as if she knew what they said up in the dark night. “I’m a Pisces. Which, is your perfect match. At least I’d say so. I’ve always felt something toward Virgo men.”

She looked at him again and then to the lighthouse as she took his hand and led them against the lighthouse wall that over looked the body of water. “I was born on February, the 19th.” She mused and gazed at the waves. Even though she was beside him, he could tell her mind was up in the states.

“September 3rd for me.” He shared and that got her attention again.

“So, tell me more. Where you were born. What year. What time.” She encouraged. He found himself willing to share anything with her in this moment. As if she erased his boundaries. He shared his story with her about his life and she seemed like she was lost in thought. Almost as if she’s a computer processing.

“It’s funny, how you randomly find someone there’s this connect you can’t describe. But you feel it so strongly. Maybe the stars aligned for us.”

He found himself lost in thought not as he looked to the softly crashing waves. He didn’t expect to be sitting beside a stranger. Most nights he would be at home and spending him time by himself. Going to sleep early. And now he let this girl lead him over to a spot he had been a million times before. Yet it felt so different. Then she spoke once again.

“I’d argue you’re one to be hard on yourself. That you need to be more confident. You seem so smart. Just reserved. And you need to not be so down about what you haven’t accomplished. You have so much time.”

It was as if she read his mind. Read him like a book. It was uncanny how she pulled those thoughts right from inside him.

“I know I’m right. You’re good looking, you just have to believe it for yourself.” She added with a smile as she looked to him.

“I’m sure I can work on that.” He spoke softly. He didn’t expect these words from this strange girl.

“Oh boy. There you go thinking.” She teased and playfully pushed against him as she laughed. “Loosen up. You’re out with a pretty girl and looking at the stars and waves. This must be the best night of your life.”

He rolled his eyes and felt his body soften. His jaw loosen. For a moment he felt relaxed. Even if he still felt flustered. In this moment he felt brave and then put his arm around her. To which she moved into his body and rested her head on his should as she looked up at him. Like she had looked up at the stars.

Maybe the stars had aligned tonight.

[fatesdeepdive]

Entry 108: I Don’t Care About Scarlet Dying

Revelation Chapter 18: Veiled Kingdom

As the skies get all fucky, Corrin and co arrive at the bridge from the start of the game. Corrin says they all have to jump off the bridge. Takumi points out that this is suicidal, and yeah he has a point. Everyone blindly trusts Corrin because Corrin is the perfect protagonist, but also Corrin doesn’t explain why they’re jumping off, or where they’re going, or who the bad guy is. If I was a character in this game, I’d think Corrin was mentally unwell and encouraging suicide.

Also, something I just realized. They can say Anankos. Garon says Anankos’s name all the time without dying. Corrin could have said that the puppetmaster was a mysterious man named Anankos. And also, the specifics of the curse aren’t clear. You can’t say the word Valla, but why can’t they say Gunter survived falling in the canyon? Say there’s a lake at the bottom containing the weapons they need to kill Anankos or some shit like that. There are a million less stupid ways to write this game.

Corrin offers to kill themselves by explaining shit, but Xander and Ryoma agree to jump without explanation. Everyone jumps into the canyon, except for Corrin and Scarlet. Good job, Corrin, not even leading the charge. Scarlet pins a flower on her chest before jumping and says that Corrin is special, but not as special as Ryoma.

Two things. Number one, Scarlet and Ryoma should have been able to Support each other. And number two, and this is the big one, it is very weird for Scarlet to suddenly have character focus when no other character receives this level of focus after being recruited. It makes what’s about to happen very obvious.

Corrin and Scarlet jump and holy shit is the Bottomless Canyon treacherous. There are hundreds of spikes sticking out of the wall and there’s only a small gap to fall through. Half of the army would realistically die. Anankos shows up, looking like a Danganronpa killer, and brags about being a god before shooting Corrin with dark magic. And yes, I know that Anankos is a random bald silhouette because he’s possessing someone and they can’t show it for plot twist reasons, but it's still stupid and jarring. Also how is Anankos here? Can people possessed by Anankos fly?

Anankos throws another attack and Scarlet pushes Corrin out of the way, dying in the process. Her flower is also destroyed. Corrin and Scarlet land on a brick road, by the way, meaning that they should have died from fall damage. I don’t care if the Bottomless Canyon isn’t bottomless, that doesn’t make momentum stop being a thing.

So, yeah. Scarlet is dead. And I want to talk about that. Fire Emblem Fates has a bad tendency to kill characters off suddenly and randomly to make the player feel sad. See Kaze dying in Birthright and Lilith in both of the original routes for other times I’ve ranted about it. The problem is, these scenes are so blatant and unearned that they fall absolutely flat. And it’s far worse with Scarlet, a character who had maybe a dozen lines total and joined two battles ago. Scarlet exists not as a character, but as a whoa look how deep we are someone died plot device. And it's pathetic.

There are deaths in Fire Emblem games that hurt like hell. Emmeryn’s death in Awakening, Geralt’s in Three Houses. Hell, the whole conceit of the game is that your units can die suddenly in battle, that characters you grow attached to are mortal. But, I don’t care about Scarlet dying. And there is one simple reason why: you could have swapped Scarlet out for any other character and the effect on the story would be identical. Hell, it would be better because those characters aren’t throwaway characters who are given two mandatory Supports and otherwise don’t really exist.

I do not give a shit about Scarlet dying because she is a minor character who exists for no reason but to die. I like her as a character, but I feel nothing about her death. This is like a comic book crossover killing off a dozen D-List characters to show how edgy their new villain is. It is mediocre, inconsequential, and formulaic writing, and I do not care.

Also you can marry Scarlet if you grind between maps, which is both funny in that it can make the player screw themselves over by making Corrin permanently spouseless, and funny because literally nothing changes about the scene. Scarlet still says Ryoma is better than Corrin and Corrin still worries about how Ryoma will feel when he finds out Scarlet is dead. Fates, through its stupid writing, gives you the ability to cuckold Corrin. Fucking phenomenal.

The rest of the fam shows up and protects Corrin from some enemies, including Azura who someone kills a Berserker. An obligatory battle starts, against that one blue-haired Strategist Vallite we saw in Hidden Truths and at the start of Revelation. This battle has our units teleporting between different islands to activate Dragon Veins to open a warp to the boss. After said boss is defeated she just vanishes.

Azura explains everything. Ryoma finally remembers that Scarlet exists and asks where she is. Wait, hold on, how did he not see her corpse when he saved Corrin? Whatever, dumb writing. Corrin shows Scarlet’s corpse to the gang and Ryoma makes Corrin promise that Scarlet’s sacrifice won’t be in vain.

I considered buying a Scarlet clone from another save file to ruin the dramatic tension, and I will do that eventually, but unfortunately, I’m broke after buying a certain unit. More on that in a minute.

After this chapter, the Hot Springs upgrade reward unit shows up. Not Izana, because he’s dead, but Fuga for some reason. You know, Hayato’s dad? The wild ride guy? He joins for some reason.

Fuga

Been a while since I did a character profile. Fuga, Hayato’s dad. Big buff chief guy. He’s recruitable, I guess. I don’t really care tbh. His personal skill, Wind Disciple, boosts Hit and Avoid when he isn't at full health. Neat.

Now, I could be excited about Fuga, even though I really don’t care, but there’s another buff tribesman without any Supports to be excited about. I’ve been saving up for a while, and I finally have the 40K needed to buy the savior of Hoshido, king of blacksmiths, wielder of the Legendary Whacker, the masked god, a man who fights for his own reasons, mother fucking Kenshi! You know, that Birthright generic captured unit I pumped all my stat boosters into until he had max strength. I plan to use him in every battle as an insurance policy. The rest of my army may die, but Kenshi is unstoppable.

Support: Moron/Fuga

C: Corrin asks Fuga about Sumeragi. Fuga explains that they were close friends and that Sumeragi was a troublemaker as a child. Fuga contemplates the fact that he's spent a life fighting, while Sumeragi is at peace. Spoilers: he isn't.

B: A young lady asks Fuga on a date. Fuga says he's too old. Corrin asks if Fuga's considered marriage before. Fuga says he loved a woman once, but she married someone else. Then she died, so he adopted her son Hayato.

A: A depressed Fuga considers retiring and letting the next generation step up. He also says he should follow Sumeragi to the grave, which seems a bit suicidal. Corrin says they still need guidance from Fuga. Fuga says Corrin shares Sumeragi's passion.

Review: Actually pretty good. This one does a good job of giving Fuga a character in his limited screen time.

Support: Corrin/Fuga

C: Corrin sees Fuga break a tree in half with a punch and asks him to teach her. Fuga offers to train her, noting that Hayato gave up on training early.

B: Fuga trains Corrin. Fuga says that Sumeragi was his brother-on-arms, but he doesn't deserve to call himself Sumeragi's friend, because he failed Sumeragi. Corrin says Fuga shouldn't blame himself, because it's Corrin's fault he died. Fuga says Sumeragi's be proud her and that she shouldn't blame herself.

A: Fuga stops teaching Corrin because he's taught Corrin everything he knows. Corrin says she likes training with Fuga. They vow to fight together.

S: Fuga says he wishes their visits weren't just centered on training. Corrin says she only trained with Fuga so they could hang out. They get together which is weird.

Review: Corrin and Fuga’s guilt is interesting...until it is forgotten about.

Support: Kaden/Peri

C: Peri freaks out because there's a caterpillar on her back. Kaden removes it and Peri asks him to squish it because it's gross. Kaden says no and explains to Peri that caterpillers turn into butterflies, something she didn't know somehow.

B: Kaden shows Peri the coccoon. Peri thinks its still gross. Kaden asks how she walks through the woods, and Peri explains she orders people to kill any bugs that come near her.

A: Peri thinks the butterfly is disgusting and decides to keep killing bugs. Kaden promises that he'll peacefully deal with bugs if she calls for him.

S: Peri says she wishes she could call Kaden when there wasn't bugs, because she likes being with him. Kaden says he loves her back. Peri says that's good, because if he didn't give her his heart, she would have been forced to cut it out and take it.

Review: Honestly, Peri works better when she's dumb and overemotional than when she's a murderer. Her freaking out about bugs is fun and Kaden's a nice guy.

Support: Elise/Ryoma

C: Ryoma helps Elise get a kite out of a tree. He thanks her for reminding him of simpler times.

B: Ryoma questions if Elise belongs on a battlefield, because she is a literal child. I would argue that she doesn't belong on the battlefield, because child soldiers are bad. Ryoma notes that, however, they need her help. He chastises himself for being powerless. Elise says she wants to fight and Ryoma praises her strength.

A: Elise teaches Ryoma how to make daisy chains. This helps make Ryoma see lasting peace as attainable.

S: Ryoma and Elise get married and it's gross and weird.

Review: S-Rank aside, this is a really good Support. It fumbles the landing on the discussions of Elise being a child soldier, but her innocence inspiring Ryoma is great.

[camrynsthoughts]

should I send this to u? I don’t think so.

using writing as an escape and to let out my thoughts has always been one of my simple pleasures in life so here I am logging back into my depressing Tumblr  account. I am sitting here on a Monday night at 11 pm, with a sore throat, listening to my “it’s the past for a reason” Spotify playlist. and of course, my brain can’t simply shut up and be quiet, it has to constantly be running and thinking. and guess who it decided to think about tonight? you.

it’s been almost two months since I heard from you last and I finally told you how I felt. and let me tell you, that shit was humbling. why did I think it was going to go any different than it did? I don’t know but it’s no surprise that I'm a tad bit delusional. so that was that and I guess I'll never hear from you again. I've done my best to ignore the fact that conversation had happened and that it was, like, really the end. but when will I learn that ignoring my emotions and pretending I'm in la la land isn’t a cure to my problems. then came last night, driving home from Bloomington and listening to music when my brain finally decided it couldn’t ignore the fact that you exist but not in my life. 

it’s such a fucking roller coaster of emotions because I know I did the right thing by saying how I truly felt about you still. and I know you did the right thing by saying you’ll stop randomly messaging me. but it’s so hard to realize that was actually the end.. or was it because I mean, we’ve said that a million times before. not the point though (this is the delusion talking). driving home from Bloomington last night, all I wanted to do was text you and ask if we could talk in your car. I just had this feeling in my gut that I needed to talk to you and nobody else. this conversation was only meant for you. you’d always tell me I could rant to you and get everything off my chest and I never had anything to get off my chest. but last night I finally did and you weren’t there. and that’s when it really fucking hit me hard that I have to get the fuck over it.

I've been so angry lately. I feel like you from before when we weren’t as mature. you were always angry and I never understood how someone could have so much anger in them, but holy fuck, I honestly get it. I'm such an angry human being and it’s so ugly. but I'm sick of being nice and happy and optimistic, holy fuck I just want to be a ball of anger. when I think of you, I get this mix of love and nostalgia but then it turns into this ugly anger. I know you’re living life and happier than before and that makes me happy for you but holy fuck I'm sick of being brainwashed for years into thinking I didn’t deserve happiness and love because I fucking do. and it enrages me knowing that everyone I know has it and I still don’t til this day. it’s not your fault but god damn I just feel so drained. and at this point I don’t have the capability to be sad. I don't remember the last time I felt sad. its just anger now. and I feel like such a bitter, jealous bitch but I don't care. I think I am allowed to be angry that everyone in my life that has thrown me off to the side is the happiest they’ve ever been while I still suffer silently with absolutely no one. 

I had such a strong urge Sunday night to talk to you, see you, anything. I knew that wasn’t tangible but I was just playing out in my head me somehow getting ahold of you. and then you’d say you’re in town and that I could drive over. I'd jump in your car and just go off. not even on you, but just in general. I want to scream and I want to release all my anger because holy shit I just want to cry. I can't get myself to cry. I have so many emotions I need to release and no one would get it but you. I'm just so fucking confused because I'm not mad at you whatsoever, but why did I get the shit end of the stick? I know I'm a good person and I deserve so fucking much in life and I don't get good things that come my way. I get stepped all over and treated like garbage and I'm so fucking sick of it. why do you get to be happy now and I don't get to be as well? its selfish but I just wish I understood the way that the universe works. 

im kind of going off on this tangent of being angry but since I can’t talk to you I guess I can just write this mess. its funny how I want to be a writer and this is the shit I write in my free time. very embarrassing because writing a diary entry isn't art Camryn. whatever that's not the point. you know, I've always wanted to send you my writing. but that would be kind of creepy because majority of it is about loving you. and also you’d then see how shit of a writer I am. but it’s also the purest part of me and I wish you could've gotten to see that. god I'm getting so off topic. but it’s my writing so I can do and say whatever really.

you know sometimes I think I’ll never get over this hurt that I was never enough for you. and I know it seems silly to say that but it’s how I feel and I'm allowed to feel how I feel. you always put me off to the side and you cheated on girls with me and I was always like this side piece and I knew it but I let myself believe I wasn't. you'd tell me I was the girl you wanted to end up being with and that now just “wasn’t the time”. so you’d talk and date other girls but then still talk to me on the side and feed me all this delusion that it’d be my time one day and that one day never came and it fucks with my head still to this day. I gave you three plus years of my life and I don't regret it at all but holy shit I wish I knew how it felt to be someone’s first choice. because lets be for real, I was never your first choice or you would've been with me and not hurting me. I remember I was so delusional thinking I actually had a chance at being your real girlfriend one day. it’s so hard when someone has hurt you so much yet has also given you the most love you’ve ever been given in your life. that’s why this shit tears me apart so much because I shouldn't love you still but god damn I still do because I don't think you're a bad person at all. I just wish I was given that chance but I never really got that, and if I did, I blew it by being psycho because I didn’t want to let you go again. I believe I ruined it for myself but I also believe I never really had a fair chance honestly because I don’t know if I'd ever be enough for you. or maybe I was too much for you. I could never tell which one was true.

I'll be honest, it pisses me off that you’re with the girl that caused me to officially leave you back in 2020. it pisses me off thinking about the possibility if I didn't give up on you that she could’ve been me. but also I don’t know what makes me think that could’ve even happened because you would’ve still chosen her over me and I know you would’ve. and that's why I left. and it seems like I was right because it seems like you guys are still going strong. but then that pisses me off even more because you aren’t even 100% loyal to her since me and you had our moments over the last year. and then it makes me realize that you haven’t changed. and I don’t know why you cheat on your girlfriends with me and I don't know why I believe if I ever did get that fair chance of dating you that you wouldn’t cheat on me. it pisses me off because I'm still In love with a cheater and I’m the one who can’t seem to be happy or find love. is this all making it make sense why I am such an angry person lately?

I know that kind of just dragged you and honestly, id say I apologize but if anything you kind of deserve it. but I'll make it even by filling you in on a secret. I never ever cheated on you, and I know I never would if I ever got the chance of being your only girl. but I cheated on my most recent ex. and no one knows because it’s fucked up and I'm embarrassed about it. so I can sit here and make it seem like you’re an asshole, and I mean you have had your asshole moments. but so have i. so I can’t hate you as much as sometimes I wish I could. sometimes I think this is also why I have so much anger in me. because I know I can be a hypocrite because god damn it camryn, why are you shitting on your first love for being a cheater when you went ahead and became a cheater as well? it was only a kiss. but then I also tried reaching out to you a few times when I was in my last relationship so that shows I didn’t love the dude like that. I still wanted you and it hurt. I'm honestly just so sick of feeling hurt and not enough. 

my recent ex was a fucking loser, bitch made, liar. but it gives me peace knowing I'll go so much further than he will in life. I was the brains in our relationship and I wore the pants and it was cool but I couldn’t date a guy like that. I like being recognized as being smart and a bad ass bitch but I need my man to be equal to that as well, not a sore loser. and that’s why I fucking love you so much because you’re the complete opposite of him when it came to everything I hated about him. he was so... dumb sometimes. but you, you are intelligent and I could sit down and talk to you for forever. I could never with him.  and don’t get me started on his music taste and fashion .... you’d roast me. 

where have I gotten with this writing? honestly no where but I can’t talk to anyone about this shit so this is all I got. i wish I could be sitting in front of you right now and just get every single little thing off of my chest without any judgement. I'm a mess and its not fun and I'm angry and sick of feeling like total shit. I'm sick of not feeling like I can be loved fully and loyally. but why would I even deserve that when I've cheated and I've helped people cheat? am I a good person? or am I just as shitty as everyone that I shit on? it makes you think. whether I'm a shitty person or not, I'm sick of feeling like shit. and I'm sick of seeing people who are as shitty as me be happy. like Im happy you're happy... but I wish I could be too at the end of the day. I wish I could be happy with you or without you but unfortunately, it’s been years and I'm still struggling. 

[clea-speaks]

Chris Demakes and Roger Lima of Less Than Jake (TW: SA, harassment, stalking)

PART 1: When I was growing up, I had it kind of rough at home and at school so I would use music as an escape in my room.  One day during my freshman year I had been listening to the local radio station and they were playing 'Johnny Quest Thinks We’re Sellouts' by Less Than Jake and I was immediately hooked. This radio station kind of picked what they wanted to play instead of playing whatever the actual single was. Fast forward to 2003 and I go see Less Than Jake for the first time at a local venue and think they’re great. I met both Roger Manganelli and Chris Demakes after the show and got my Borders and Boundaries cd signed by them. At the time I thought Roger was nice but thought Chris was strange.  The following year they returned, and they invited my friends and I out to a tiny hole in the wall bar after the show. I was the only one of age. During our hangs at the bar Roger paid extra special attention to me and wanted a picture with me. He put his arm around me and pulled me close to him and touched the side of his head to mine. Afterwards my friends kept calling him Uncle Raj and I didn’t know why until much later. They thought he was creepy.

I don’t remember exactly when he gave me his AIM screen name and email address wanting me to keep in touch. It was probably end of 2003 or early 2004 but he found my MySpace. This was really when things started getting weird. He had added me from his other band Rehasher’s MySpace account and in the middle of the night he would slide into my DMs while he had been drinking and/or smoking. At one point I had the song 'The Science Of Selling Yourself Short' on my MySpace profile because it was one of my favorites at the time. One night he slides into my DMs asking me to remove the song so he "could masturbate in peace". At the time I didn’t see all the red flags or realize how inappropriate he was starting to get. I was kind of excited that someone was showing interest in me because I definitely wasn’t cool during my school years. He made me feel like I was part of the cool crowd. As time went on, I was getting instant messages on AIM from him saying that I should do porn, I should strip, saying he wanted to get me a toy because he wanted to see me use it, etc. He’d frequently ask for nudes, but I was hesitant because I’ve always been really uncomfortable with my body. During this time Roger was living with his girlfriend and he told me he had to wait until she was sleeping before he could talk to me. He also liked to randomly say that he was horny and loved blowjobs. Looking back now I would have blocked him and never gone to see them play again. A former friend of mine, who was visiting, and I went to 3 of their shows in 2006. Chris gave her his number, somehow convinced her to send him nudes and then he ghosted her. At a show in 2007 (I think) they were doing the wheel of fortune thing and I won a cereal box with their logo on it. They told the crowd it had a giant d*ldo inside. I was mortified. Thankfully it was just a t-shirt, guitar strings, a shot glass and a couple other little things. During the show I was drinking and drank a little too much. Before I left, I went to go say goodbye to Roger and found both him and Chris outside the bus. They started making comments about my breasts and saying they were fake. They’re not and I told them that. After I said they’re real they both touched my breasts. I never consented to this and couldn’t have with how much I had drank. Never in a million years (at that time) would I have thought they would do that to me.

[americancowgirl19]

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Summary: Your boyfriend, Eddie Munson, is starting to get heart eyes when looking at Steve Harrington and you’ve taken notice. Scared to lose Eddie to Steve you offer another solution - for you and Steve to share Eddie

Warnings: angst, fluff, trepidation

Reader: Female Reader

Pairings: Eddie Munson x Reader, Future Eddie Munson x Steve Harrington, Future Eddie Munson x Reader x Steve Harrington, Future Slow Burn Steve Harrington x Reader

Word Count: 1141

A/n: This is me dabbling in Stranger Things, I’ve never seen an episode so everything I’ve learned from the characters have been through fanfiction. I have a storyline idea and I’ll continue if this goes well, if not then I’ll stick with what I know!

Masterlist - Part Two (Fucking Billy)

“You like Steve... don’t you?” You bring up randomly while hanging out with Eddie in his room. You were working on some homework while he was going to town on his D&D campaign. 

You hadn’t been able to get far in your work because this question was burning a hole in your mind. You, Steve and Eddie had gone to high school together. You and Eddie had gotten together during his last attempt at senior year, a couple of months before Chrissy’s death and that whole fiasco. 

You and Steve ended up going to the same college and Eddie followed you. College isn’t really Eddie’s thing, but his band is doing really well at the bars and parties on campus.

Since you and Steve had some classes together, he was always around, the two of you leaning on each other to get through the brutal first semester. As Steve hung around you more, he inevitable hung with Eddie as well. The two of them were growing closer, forming their own style of friendship. Only recently you wondered if it was starting to go beyond friendship.

There’s been more than one instance where you and Steve are working together, and you’ve caught Steve staring at your boyfriend. The same has happened with Eddie. The staring and the flirting that they didn’t realize they did with each other were beginning to add up.

Despite Eddie’s attention turning on Steve he wasn’t being any less loving or attentive to you either; his attention was just slightly more divided now. Still, with Eddie growing more affectionate towards Steve you couldn’t help but to become nervous.

You saw this happen with your previous relationship. Everything was going great until someone else caught their eye and BAM they were gone. It was an ugly breakup that took you a long time to recover from. You didn’t think you’d have to worry about this happening with Eddie, he isn’t the type to cheat on you and you don’t think he will either. You’re just not a hundred percent sure that he’s going to stay with you if he finds better qualities in Steve.

“What do you mean?” Eddie asks, his eyes remaining downcast. It didn’t matter what he said after that, you had your answer. Before his infatuation with Steve, he would have jumped up and denied it. He would have made you laugh, give you a million kisses until the thoughts disappeared. 

Eddie Munson like liked Steve Harrington.

“Oh, come on, Eddie,” You sighed, pushing your things to the side. “You know exactly what I’m talking about,” You state, calling him out as you climb off the bed. Only then does his head turn towards you and the truth in his eyes only solidifies your theories. “You like Steve. Like you like like him,”

“I love you,” Eddie stresses, standing up from his chair across the room.

“I don’t doubt that” You whisper, hugging yourself. “But for how long?” You wonder, a sad smile crossing your lips.

“What do you mean how long?” Eddie asks. “You’re my girl,” He states as if that clears everything up.

“How long until you grow bored of me? We’ve been together for a while now, Eddie. I guess I should be glad your eye hasn’t wondered off before but now that it is I can’t help but to think how much longer I’m going to be in the picture,” You confess, feeling your anxiety growing. You begin to pace slowly, your hands scratching your arms.

Steve and Eddie are the only friends you have on campus. If Eddie leaves you for Steve, then how can you hang out with them? You’ll lose them both in a snap of your fingers and you’ll be all alone. This college bullshit is hard enough, you didn’t think you could make it through the classes without their support.

“Be in the picture?” Eddie asks, slowly approaching you as if he were approaching a wild animal. “Sweetheart, you are the picture. You’re the sun I orbit around, the muse to my music, the Arwen to my Aragorn,” Eddie lists, coming closer with each phrase until he’s right in front of you.

You force yourself to stand still. He gently takes your hands from your arms and holds them firmly within his own. He guides your hands to his mouth where he places gentle kisses on your knuckles before wrapping them around his neck. Your fingers thread through his long, wavy hair while he grips your hips and holds you close.

“How could I grow bored of the only woman who actually saw me when I was nobody? When I am a nobody?”

“Baby, you’re not nobody-”

“Shh, I’m wooing right now,” Eddie whispers, kissing your cheek. You felt your cheeks warm, but you don’t say anything else as he continues. “I have been... flirting with Steve and I’m sorry I made you uncomfortable,”

“I just don’t want you to leave me,” You mutter softly. Eddie bumps his nose against yours.

“That’s blasphemous,” Eddie teases. “Honey, I’d marry you in a heartbeat if you’d let me but no, we have to wait until after you graduate,” Eddie rolls his eyes.

Eddie would have married your while the two of you were in senior year, only a couple of months after being together. He was positive you were the light of his life, the reason for his existence. He’s been obsessed with you since day one when you showed up to one of his gigs; he couldn’t keep his eyes off you that night... nor his hands...

“But you like Steve...” You bring up again. Eddie sighs slowly not denying it. You give him a soft smile, moving one hand from around his neck to press against his chest. “You just have too much love to give, Eddie Munson. Is that it?”

“Exactly, sweetheart,” Eddie says softly, being careful not to say the wrong thing.

“If I have to share you, then so be it...” You decide. “As long as there’s room for me left,”

“You really mean that?” Eddie asks, slowly lightening up.

“If he’s fine with me keeping you... then I’ll share,” You reassure him. A grin splits across his face. He whoops loudly, wrapping you in his arms and spinning you around.

“Baby, you have nothing to worry about. You’re never getting rid of me,” Eddie winks at you before planting a deep, passionate kiss on your lips that makes you go dizzy. “I love you. I love you. I love you,” Eddie mutters in between kisses causing you to laugh and hold onto him.

As relieved as you felt to realize Eddie wasn’t leaving you, you couldn’t help but feel trepidatious about Steve. Did you willingly let Eddie pursue the man that will lead to your breakup? Or is this what Eddie really needs, the two of you?

[omgsquee2001]

Stanley Hotel: Part 4

~~~~~~

[Y/N] looked up at Nadia. “So, um, do you think that I might come up against this thing again?” She asked. Nadia sighed and took a deep breath.

“If you want my honest opinion, yes,” Nadia said. [Y/N] tensed. “Yes. From what I feel, in the future, you are going to come up against the entity that you faced from you past.” She said. [Y/N] let out a shaky breath. Nadia patted her hand in comfort. Colby reached over and put his hand on her shoulder in comfort.  “However, it’s very good that you have recognized that this entity that you faced before is full of hate and so full of anger. Now that you recognize that, you know what to expect.” She said. [Y/N] smiled slightly. “If you are unsure when you do face it, just remember these words: I am stronger than you, I have the power of God on my side, I am not afraid of you, you cannot hurt me.” Nadia said. [Y/N] smiled at the woman and nodded in thanks. 

“Thank you.” She said. Corey took her place next to Nadia. [Y/N] had moved to siting in Colby’s lap, his arms protectively around her. Nadia hummed. 

“It’s, what I see is that in the near future, just like [Y/N] this is something that you are coming up against, that you have come up against before.” Nadia said. Corey looked at Sam in slight fear. Just like she had done with the young Medium, she took Corey’s hand and patted it in reassurance. “And I want you to know that, um, even though it may be frightening, just like [Y/N], you’ll be ready for it.” She said. She let go of Corey’s hand. 

“So, you’re saying that, that the “bad”, that you see is most likely tomorrow?” Corey asked. [Y/N] tensed in Colby’s arms. Though she knew that she would have to face what she saw all those years ago, most likely tomorrow, she was terrified of the thought. Colby kissed her head in reassurance, gently rubbing his hand up and down her arm. Nadia took a breath. 

“Well, it’s, it’s gonna come up soon,” she said. Corey looked at Sam in fear again. What Corey was going to face, he had held with him for a long time. The same with [Y/N]. She had not told anyone about what she had seen at the Stanley Hotel until tonight. “I don’t want either of you to panic.” Nadia said. Corey nodded and crossed his arms. 

“Yeah, I mean, I got my cross,” he said. He looked over at [Y/N]. “And I’m sure [Y/N] has, like, what ever Medium precautions she takes.” He said, causing everyone to chuckle. 

“Yeah, Corey doesn’t panic.” Sam said. Corey nodded. 

“Yeah, I’m not scared at all.” He said. [Y/N] looked at him. 

“You say that every single time, and then something happens and you run.” She said, chuckling. Everyone else laughed along, basking in the happy energy while they still could. Corey smiled. 

“Well, no, that’s when I’m not prepared for the trip Sam and Colby randomly take us on. I’ve been prepared for this trip since,” he looked at his wrist, pretending to look at the time. “30 minutes ago.” Corey said. [Y/N] laughed. Everyone else laughed. 

“Oh, only for 30 minutes, that’s amazing.” Nadia said laughing. “Now, we label things “bad”,” Nadia explained after everyone calmed down. “When you’re going into the spirit world, you are kind of crossing into territories that are, probably best left undisturbed,” Nadia explained. Sam panned the camera over at Colby and [Y/N]. The two were holding hands and listening to what Nadia was saying. “Most of the world isn’t “good” or “bad”. They are just experiences to help you to learn and move on.” She said. Nadia looked over at Colby and [Y/N]. “And how long do you want to keep doing this ghost stuff?” She asked. Colby took a deep breath and looked at [Y/N]. He then looked at Sam. 

“Till we get 10 million subscribers!” Colby said, causing everyone to laugh. Sam and Colby chuckled. 

“If we get 10 million subscribers right now, we won’t go to the Stanley Hotel.” Sam said. Nadia looked at all of them. 

“Do you guys feel like you are pushing your luck, by doing this?” She asked. Colby nodded and looked at [Y/N]. [Y/N] nodded. 

“Honestly, yeah. It’s basically why we quit doing YouTube for about three weeks.” She said. Colby nodded. He ran his thumb over her knuckles. 

“Yeah. It was getting, really dangerous.” He said. He looked up at Sam. Nadia nodded. Sam panned the camera over towards Corey and Jake. Corey had his head down and his arms crossed. Jake nodded. 

“It gets scary, but I have fun.” He said, smiling. [Y/N] smiled at him. 

“It is fun.” She said. Nadia chuckled. 

“So, so you are looking forward to this?” Sam asked. Jake nodded, the smile still on his face. 

“Yeah.” He said. 

“One hundred percent?” 

“Yeah. I’m excited man.” Jake said. Sam panned the camera over towards Corey. 

“How about you, Corey?” He asked. Corey honestly didn’t look that excited, he still had his arms crossed. 

“Huh?” Corey asked, looking at Sam. 

“He’s, he’s closed,” Nadia said. She crossed her arms over her own chest, showing what she meant. “You notice his body posture,” she reached for his arm. “Here, give me your hand.” She said. Corey laughed and let her take his hand. “Open up.” She said, rubbing is hand. 

“My palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy,” he said. Everyone laughed at Corey’s somewhat reference to Eminem‘s song, Loose Yourself. “I’m gonna start rapping an Eminem song.” Corey said, laughing. Nadia looked down at his hand again. 

“Your life line bends. Strong, full line.” She said. A smile broke out across Corey’s face. 

“Yeah!” He shouted, pulling up his shirt sleeve and flexing his muscles. He pointed to everyone in the room, laughing. “Take that Colby!” He shouted. Colby chuckled and rubbed his forehead. 

“Shit.” Colby cursed. Nadia rubbed his shoulder comfortingly. 

“He’s living a long, healthy life.” She said. 

“Oh he is?” Corey asked. [Y/N] looked at Corey. 

“Why do you sound disappointed by that?” She asked, laughing. She then kissed Colby on the cheek. “I for one, am glad that you are living a long healthy life.” She said. Colby chuckled and moved his arm to wrap around her waist. 

“Thanks, babe.” He said, then pulled her into a kiss. Nadia smiled at the two. 

“I just feel like Colby’s going to have a struggle, with someone.” She said. 

“And you said with Corey and [Y/N], you said that it had to do with something they’ve seen before?” Sam asked. 

“It feels like they are coming up against a previous experience that they both had when they were younger. Obviously, [Y/N] explained her encounter before with the dark, hateful and angry entity, and Corey when he was younger.” Nadia explained. “It’s just, both experiences are going to be a little different.” She said. Corey shook his head and looked at Sam. 

“And you know what that is.” He said. Sam smiled. 

“Wait, dude, you’ve told me what that was before.” He said. Nadia looked at Corey. 

“Because he’s been holding this in his energy, uh, and, and the same with [Y/N]. I could tell that she had been holding that encounter within her energy for so long. They’re both ready to let it go, and I’m afraid that it may take a shock,” she looked over at [Y/N]. “Or a jolt to do that. Especially with what [Y/N] encountered.” She looked over at Corey. “But that happens to all of us.” She said. “If, if we want something, and we, and we don’t follow through with it, like something happens and you’re pushed into it, like uh, you’re fired from your job that you hated,” Nadia explained. The others nodded, following along with what she was saying. “You know, it’s that kind of thing.” She said. Sam panned the camera over towards Corey, who was now leaning against his wrist with his arm propped up against his knee. Nadia looked at [Y/N]. “So you’re ready for this confrontation, you’re ready to let this thing go,” she looked at Corey. “And you’re ready for this healing. It just may not feel like a healing or that you’re letting your previous experience go.” Nadia said. Corey had gone back to crossing his arms over his chest. 

“Sounds like the Shadow Man to me.” Corey said. Everyone started chuckling. “It sounds like, like some demon is about to return!” Corey said. 

“Since you’ve like, met us, or way, way past?” Sam asked. Corey shook his head. 

“No bro, that was when I was a little kid,” Corey said. “I didn’t find out what it was until I was like, 17. But yeah, I’ve seen it for years.” He said. 

“For the views who had no idea what you’re talking about, and for her,” Sam said, panning the camera towards Nadia. “What exactly happened? Maybe she can help you figure that out.” Sam asked. Colby, Sam, Jake and [Y/N] all knew what happened to Corey as a child that caused him to have this thing attach to him. [Y/N] had tried to help him out, but to no avail. Corey sighed and looked at Nadia. 

“I used to play with a Ouija Board a lot when I was a little kid.” Corey explained. 

“By your self?” She asked. Corey nodded. 

“Yeah, by myself, with friends, with family, but by myself yeah, a lot,” Corey said. He went on to explain what happened. After he had finished explaining, Nadia nodded. 

“Yeah, and I think that’s, that’s actually opening a portal you don’t really want to open and going to a haunted place is one thing,” she said, looking over at Colby and [Y/N]. “But, trying direct communication through a Ouija Board,” she said. Corey nodded. 

“Yeah. It’s horrible.” He said. Nadia nodded, agreeing with him. Corey looked at Sam. “Do we have to go tomorrow?” He asked. “You sure, you sure we have to go?” He asked. Everyone laughed, the tension in the air from Corey’s story lifting. 

“Already bought the tickets bro.” Sam said. Corey looked at him. 

“Positive?” He asked. Sam nodded. 

“Yeah.” He said. 

“Non refundable?” Corey asked. “I could’ve sworn there was a new movie coming out tomorrow, but it’s fine,” Corey said. [Y/N] looked at him. 

“Oh, so you wanted to go watch that instead?” She asked. Corey looked at her and nodded. 

“Yeah, but I mean, it’s cool, it’s cool.” He said. Nadia looked at Jake. 

“I haven’t given you much attention, are you okay?” She asked. Jake smiled. 

“Yeah, yeah I’m good.” Jake said, laughing. Nadia looked over at Colby and [Y/N]. 

“How are you feeling, young man?” She asked. Colby shook his head and sighed. 

“I mean, I wasn’t prepared, to hear that, today.” He said. Nadia nodded. 

“That black energy there?” She asked. Colby nodded. 

“Yeah,” he looked over at Sam. “But, I mean, I’m ready. We’ve been planning this for so long now, we just, have to do it.” Colby said. He glanced over at [Y/N], rubbing her back. “What about you, babe? How are you feeling?” He asked. [Y/N] sighed. 

“If I’m being completely honest, I’m pretty scared, and I’m sure that when we get there, I will be beyond terrified,” she said. “This is something that, I’ve never told anyone. My parents, by friends,” she looked at the boys. “When I told you guys, that was the first time I had told anyone about the encounter I had.” She said. Nadia nodded. 

“Yeah. But like I said, you’re ready for this confrontation. Do you think you’re ready?” She asked. [Y/N] sighed and nodded. 

“Yes. Despite the nerves, I’m ready. I’ve waited such a long time for the day when I would go back to the Stanley Hotel and face the entity I saw that day, and truly face my fears.” She said. Nadia nodded. 

“Yeah. And don’t forget you guys, bring green, bring love.” She said. Jake looked at her. 

“What’s like, the worst color you could bring?” He asked. Nadia let out a breath. 

“Black.” She said. Jake glanced at the camera, causing everyone to laugh. 

“He’s like, that’s my whole closet!” Sam said, causing everyone to laugh again. Corey stood up and faced Nadia. 

“Thank you, so much, we appreciate it.” Colby said. He went in for a hand shake, but Nadia opened her arms for a hug. 

“Yeah, of course, my pleasure.” She said. She pulled away from the hug and brought [Y/N] in for a hug next. 

“It was so nice to meet you.” The young Medium said. 

“Yeah, it was great to meet you to.” She said. “I can’t wait to see what happens.” She said. 

~~~~~

Taglist: 

@werewolfbanshee-love

@crystal-multiplefandomlover

@yor72​

//As promised, here is Part 4. I honestly have no idea how many parts this is going to be broken into, we’ll see. I would love to hear what you all would like to see happen next. I’m open to any and all ideas.//

[rocorambles]

Patient 1: Addiction

Pairing: Toji x Reader

Genre/Warnings: Yandere, NSFW, Predator and Prey themes, Cum play, Knife play, Non-Con, Degradation

Link to: Prologue

Patient Name: Fushiguro Toji

Diagnosis: Adrenaline Addiction

Your brow furrows as you stare down at your first patient’s files. An addiction isn’t uncommon, but to adrenaline? You suppose it’s possible to become addicted to just about anything. Yet there are a million questions buzzing on the tip of your tongue as you turn to Uraume who just shrugs and says you’re better off hearing it straight from Toji’s own mouth.

Everything about this psychiatric facility is strange and you curiously stare at the elevator buttons as both of you descend, noting how each button has a name of a patient next to it with the final button having no label.

“Each patient has their own floor. They’ve been here for so long that we thought it would be more humane to give them ample room to live in instead of the standard patient rooms you typically see in other facilities. After all, we’re not here to treat them like caged animals, right?”

The humanitarian in you can’t defy that logic, but you can’t help but wonder if it’s safe for them to not be bound during your session, only to cringe at your own thoughts. They’re just ill patients, humans just like you, not prisoners. With that newfound determination you stride out of the elevator only to freeze when you hear the outer elevator cage slam close on your heels.

You turn, hoping to see Uraume right behind you, but your heart sinks when you see them safely on the other side of the metal fence, an eerie grin on their face as the actual elevator doors slide shut, leaving you with some parting words.

“I’ll see you when you’re done seeing all your patients today.”

Not even seconds pass before you’re scrambling to look for a button or anything to help pry open the elevator doors, fear overwhelming you as Uraume’s ominous farewell haunts you. But there’s no escape and you turn around to take in your surroundings, trembling and on the verge of tears.

Expansive is an understatement and you nervously walk around the dimly lit area, quickly losing track of all the rooms, corridors, and dead ends you bypass and amble through despite doing your best to keep track of everything. It almost feels like it’s meant to be a maze or obstacle course of sorts…

“Well, well, well. Look at the new little mouse I’ve found.”

Your heart threatens to burst out of your chest only to still in shock when you see a familiar face grinning at you, immediately connecting it to the manilla folder tightly clenched in your hands.

“Fushiguro Toji?”

“And you must be the new shrink. Follow me, doc. I’m sure you have a lot of questions. They always do.”

You don’t want to think about what’s happened to your predecessors, this “they” Toji’s referring to. You don’t want to follow this stranger. You don’t want to be trapped in this unknown environment with a highly dangerous patient and no means of escape. But what choice do you have? And with limbs weighted with despair, you trail after the dark haired man.

You’re surprised when Toji leads you into a room not far off from the police interrogation rooms you’ve seen in movies. A single table with a chair on either side are the only furniture in the room and you quietly take a seat across from where Toji has casually slumped himself down. But you note how his large stature easily overwhelms the small space, making the substantial table between you seem meaningless.

There’s silence as you fidget and fumble with Toji’s file, trying to find any professionalism and composure you have left as said patient continues leering at you, an amused smirk ever present on his face. It feels silly to treat this like any other examination, but it seems like the only thing you can do, what Toji himself is expecting of you.

“What is...what is adrenaline addiction, in your own words?”

You wonder if this is what opening Pandora’s box felt like, the question barely out of your mouth before regret instantly seizes you as Toji’s grin only grows wider and sharper, a crazed look in his eyes when he replies.

“It means I like being excited a little too much, doc.”

“And what excites you?”

You don’t want to know his response, but it’s the only way forward and dread fills you as he responds.

“Oh, lots of things. The burn of my throat and rush to my head after taking a shot. Gambling and the uncertainty of whether you’ll win or lose. The look of despair on my victim’s face when I shove a knife through their beating heart. The way it feels so fucking perfect to shove my dick in any tight hole it’ll fit in. But you know what makes me the most excited, doc?”

It’s theatrical how he tapers off, green eyes piercing you as he silently orders you to acknowledge him. And all you can do is shake your head side to side, tears threatening to fall from your eyes as you play right into his hands.

“What makes me the most excited is the thrill of hunting pretty prey like you.”

Instincts have you jumping out of your chair and bolting from the room. You don’t dare turn to see if Toji is chasing you down, his amused cackle at your expense trailing behind you. You’re blindly running, no sense of direction as you randomly turn left and right, your only prerogative to keep moving, hopefully farther and farther from your patient. Every corridor, every passage, every room looks the same and you struggle to breathe as quietly as you can despite the way your lungs ache.

You strain to listen, but it’s hard to focus on anything other than the drumming of your racing heart and you don’t hear the figure casually ambling towards you until you’re being roughly shoved face first into the wall you’re leaning on, a toned figure pressed against your back, caging you in.

“Now, now. You’re making this way too easy. Tired already?”

It’s a rhetorical question, one you can’t bring yourself to answer anyway, not with the way your teeth chatter and your body trembles in fear as Toji loudly inhales your scent while he buries his nose in the crook of your neck, tongue lazily licking a strike of your salty sweat.

You sob as he harshly bites down, not enough to break skin, but enough to leave you aching and hold you still as his hands wander underneath your clothes, groping and kneading your breasts and ass. You’re too scared to move, fearing the consequences of resisting, praying that maybe this is it, that you’ll be let off when he gets his fill of feeling you up. But you can’t help the way you yelp and instinctively struggle against his hold when he tires of your frozen state and decides to ruthlessly twist your nipples and shove a thick finger into your tight hole.

“There we go. Glad to know you’re still alive and kicking. I don’t enjoy fucking dead and broken toys like that pink haired bastard does.”

Pink haired bastard? Your mind briefly flashes to a hazy picture you’re sure you had seen in one of the patient files. What was his name-

You shriek as Toji shoves another finger alongside the digit already in you, sobbing as you feel him stretching your walls, relentlessly pounding his fingers in and out of you, his fingers painfully pulling at your nipples. All you hear is his grunts in your ears and you clench your eyes in disgust when you feel a long hard object grinding against you, knowing full well what it is without even looking.

He’s going to rape and kill you. This is how it all ends. And you wait for it, the searing pain of that massive shaft impaling you. But it never comes and before you know it you’re moaning as he twists and flexes until he finds that soft spongy spot inside of you, insistently rubbing and stroking it with curled fingers as he continues dry humping you from behind.

You’re so lost in the sensations that you don’t notice how your body is betraying you as it unconsciously grinds back against Toji’s hand, your ass shaking and pressing even harder against Toji’s cock. It’s funny how easily you’ve lost any common sense, but you’re not here to be a vapid bimbo toy. He’ll save that side of you for one his fellow inhabitants who’ll appreciate it more and he abruptly pulls his now soaked digits out of you, snorting at how you whine from the loss.

You look so confused, so stupid as he rapidly finishes himself off, hooking down your bottoms low enough for him to shoot his sticky seed all over the inner fabric of your panties. And he grins when you practically moan as he pulls your undergarments back into place, cruelly tugging a tad too hard and wedging his cum and the stained lace deep between your abused folds.

You’re panting, looking like a wreck as you try to ground yourself from the dizzying confusion of being pulled right from the brink of an orgasm, the emptiness of your edging making your head foggy. But then something sharp is being pressed against your vulnerable neck and it’s enough to have fear jolt you back to your senses.

“Don’t be such a boring slut. Time to run and hide again. It’s playtime, bitch. Or maybe you need me to cut you up a bit. Pain’s always a good motivator.”

He’s barely finished speaking before you’re shoving him and his knife away from you and he whistles in appreciation as he watches you race away again, taking his time to tuck himself back in his pants. You’ll need as much of a head start anyway to even try and remotely make some sense of this labyrinth he knows every corner of. Not that any advantage will actually help you much. Toji’s never had a prey he couldn’t catch.

How many times has he found you and released you after defiling you just a bit more every time? Neither of you can keep track and only when Toji has shoved his cock in all three of your holes, filling every orifice with his cum and fuckig you until you can barely walk does your session end. It’s almost comical how he has to quite literally drag you back to the elevator you had come from and he cruelly laughs at the white sticky trail you’re leaving behind you with your loose holes unable to keep in the copious fluids.

You barely register what’s happening, too exhausted, too fucked out of your mind to even be bothered by the rough friction of the ground against your body, only mildly stunned by the fact that the elevator you had frantically tried to re-enter is now innocently open. And it’s with muted despair that you realize what fate has in store for you as Toji presses the button of the next lower level.

Gojo Satoru

The neatly labeled name is all you register before the elevator doors slide open and you’re shoved out of it, blearily making out the sight of Toji tauntingly waving at you from inside the metal enclosure.

“See you at tomorrow’s session, doc.”

Your world goes dark as the elevator doors shut.

[dememetor]

HEY HEY HEY

I love your writing, can I please get jealous hcs for anyone? Please include suna thi he's my latest brainrot hAHA

hi, thanks for the request! and suna brainrot?? bitch me too the fuck. anyways, hope you enjoy~

(also sorry this is kinda late, i've rewritten iwaizumi and bokuto ones a million times)

Haikyuu boys when they're jealous

characters suna rintarou, kuroo tetsurou, iwaizumi hajime, bokuto koutarou, kenma kozume

warnings none but i'm probably gonna say fuck at some point

Suna Rintarou

he tries to be chill about it, he does

it hurts his ego to be this clingy but god

he can't help but to feel that sour sting of jealousy when he sees another guy approaching you

at first will only take a quick glance from afar, just to check if the guy is bothering you, and then promises himself to stay out of your business

well he doesn't

once he decides the guy has lost talking-to-y/n-alone privilege, he will nonchalantly make his way towards you, one hand in his pocket, other sneaking its way to your shoulder, resting his elbow and giving the poor boy a menacing look

he can be pretty intimidating too with that eyeliner and all

(but that look only works on people that don't know him well, he tried it on atsumu once and the latter just laughed in his face)

not the type to be openly jealous but when he sees someone blatantly flirting with you he will start to give you the Glance

blinks slowly (you know, like that one blonde haired guy gif) and looks at you through raised eyebrows as if to say hey babe, i love you and i trust you. what the fuck tho

and when the guy starts being borderline creepy he'll appear between you - and i mean literally will inject himself between you two and strike a conversation with you as if nothing weird happened

they usually get the hint, but this one guy tried to go around him, still rambling about whatever and suna literally turned on his heel and said "come again?" with such unrivaled coldness, his eyes exuding just sheer fucking spite

but like i said, unless the other guy is asking for it, he's not the type to start a direct confrontation

will take you by the hand and leave without much thought because he simply doesn't have the time for that shit

he might seem grumpy afterwards but a couple of soft kisses usually do the trick

soft kisses which are followed by a breathless make out session with you on his kitchen counter because he still wants you to know you're only his

Kuroo Tetsurou

this little bitch

never gets jealous

and i mean never

once pretended he was jealous just to make you feel better (??? his logic? unparalleled) but once you found out you beat his ass

loves it when you get jealous though (he thinks it's cute)

sometimes he does get insecure, but he shows it in an unusual way

like if you've been talking to someone, smiling at your phone for a while he'll just get up and randomly do a couple puhs-ups, start flexing his muscles and shit

all while you're looking at him like,,

"babe, what are you doing"

"oh i didn't think you'd notice me there. since you're on your damn phone all day"

"...are you my mom?"

nah he'll be fine (will steal your phone though)

also it's the funniest thing when he sees someone trying to flirt with you

he will literally walk over there, introduce himself (not mentioning he's your boyfriend) and act really interested in the conversation

he plays this game where he tries to see how long will it take the guy to realise you two are together (longest time: 24 minutes, record holder: yahaba shigeru)

whenever the guy asks you something he will interrupt you and answer for himself as if the guy were flirting with him

"so, like what do you do in your free time?"

"not mu-"

"oh i love taking long walks on the beach, especially during sunsets. i really think it is healthy for the mind and the soul, not to mention quite romantic too. don't you too love sunsets, kevin?"

at one point kevin will have had enough of it

"i was talking to y/n alone here"

"aw don't worry, you're not bothering me"

he is such a pain in the ass

why can't he just be normal

Iwaizumi Hajime

rational, mature, i love him

seriously, he is the bestest boy and he will treat you so well because he trusts you and respects your friendship with other guys as well

but on those rare occasions when he does get jealous,, oh boy

first of all, the PDA skyrockets, he has to have his arm around you at all times - around your shoulder? on your waist? in your backpocket? his hand's been there done that

not in any way possesive but will be really annoying unless you give him your full undivided attention that day

he lets himself be selfish a bit, after all he is your boyfriend he can have you all to himself for a day, right?

jealous sex with him? better prepare a wheelchair cause you want be able to walk straight tomorrow

sees a boy trying to flirt with you? tries not to make a scene but absolutely will throw the first punch if he needs to

one day he was having a particularly rough time at practice and all he wanted to do was lose himself in your arms and fall asleep to the feeling your fingertips tangled in his hair

and then he saw this?? guy? (the audacity!) laughing with you after telling some dumb joke and let me tell you - iwaizumi wasn't having any of it

he came up to you from behind, wrapped his arms around your waist and planted a small kiss on the crook of your neck

"when are we going home, love?"

and he gives him the calmest yet most fear inducing stare from behind you

and suddenly the pattern on poor boy's pants starts to look awful lot like piss stain

it is actually kinda hot how one single look from him can cause such a reaction

"he was just asking about english homework babe"

"yeah that's what they all say"

Bokuto Koutarou

gets jealous so so easily

it is actually fascinating

will get mad at otome games

"what does jumin han have that i don't???"

god forbid you pay attention to your pet more than him (btw you have a golden retriever and his name is bean)

you're sitting on the couch cuddling with your dog, scratching his ears, ruffling his fur and all that, and there he is, your clingy boyfriend, snuggling right next to you, demanding you play with his hair too

so dramatic

"you smiled at him... the way you used to smile at me..."

"bokuto, he's a dog"

the only guy he trusts 100% to be around you is akaashi, even kuroo is on thin ice

but him and akaashi are something else, one time you three had a sleepover and you felt like you were the third wheel

will act like a tough serious boyfriend in front of others, especially your other guy friends but in reality will look for affection immediately after

oh while we're at it - jealous bokuto kisses? are the best kisses

will also force you to wear one of his shirts for the rest of the day

my poor man is so touch starved so when he feels insecure or jealous he will look for comfort in things like holding your hand, nuzzling your neck or giving forehead kisses

but later that day, when you two are sitting on the couch cuddling he will quietly ask you something along the lines of "you still think i'm pretty, right?"

you can feel him all over you - his hands are creeping down your waist, he's pulling you in, deepening the kiss until all you can see, think and feel is him

he wants to show you exactly how much he wants you and what you were missing out on while you weren't paying attention to him

and it shocks you for a moment because you didn't realise just how much that one short moment of jealousy actually stayed with him

you have to reassure him he's the most beautiful boy you have ever met, and not only that, but also the funniest and the most caring person as well, and that you would never leave his side no matter what happened

and as much as he loves getting praised he always gets embarrassed, so he just smiles in return, but he is also happy to know you're there for him and you don't think he is too much

Kenma Kozume

it depends on his mood honestly

sometimes he doesn't mind it even if the other guy is flirting with you and sometimes will get pissy if you smile at the cashier

but when this boy gets really jealous oh my GOD

he is just like bokuto if not worse; he just hides it so well

one time you went grocery shopping with him and spent the entire time texting your friend who had just told you she was visiting your city

and he got so offended

you didn't even notice it until later that day when you came home and he suddenly refused to cuddle with you

silent treatment

lifts his nose and ignores you, only giving you dirty side glances from under the eye

such a massive sense of pride in those 170 cm even oikawa would be impressed

in my country there's a saying "it's in the smallest bottle that the poison lies" and honestly? yeah

at some point you realise why he's acting like that and you start teasing him

"i am not jealous i am just mildly irritated" is the only thing he deems necessary to say before going back to being unnecessarily pissed

he reminds you of an angry cat

it's kind of amusing seeing him like this but you were also getting real tired of his shit

don't even try bribing him (you tried buying him over with a ps5 but he just looked at you unimpressed, disgusted that you think so low of him)

the only thing he will accept is a sincere apology

if it's sincere or not is up to him to decide, obviously

which can lead to quite some bickering

will try to get you to beg but please have dignity, if you do it once he will make you do it every time

yeah generally a lttle shit but his kisses after making up are just as eager as yours so

[jonnnysuh]

Dating Johnny would include

Requested by anon: I love your “dating ___ would include” it’s so cute I’ve binge read literally all of them. Could you do one for Johnny?? Thank youuuuu in advance

A/N: I HAVE BEEN WANTING TO DO THIS ONE FOR SO LONG AND BC TWO PPL REQUESTED IT I WAS LIKE 'YO IT'S GO TIME' SO THANK U.

Series Masterlist

Crushing Stages:

Comes into your life in the most random way. Like you guys consistently shop at the same grocery store.

He goes out of his way to interact with you and he absolutely feels no ways bc he’s done this before. Many times.

When he likes someone he just acts on it

So Johnny reaches for the thing you wanted on the top shelf, ready to give u a clever comment

But right when he hands you the item, and gets a good look at you for the first time, he stumbles on his words [vibes] but his recovery???? 1000

Gets your number right there and plays it cool but when he walks away he like mumbles to himself like “why did I say that?”

Dating:

Does all he can to make you forget he was a babbling mess the first time

And it pretty much works bc he has such a comforting presence

Like u find yourself admitting stuff you’ve never told anyone before

And YES he’ll tease you for it and never let u live it down

but in turn he has pretty good memory and never forgets the stories/details you’ve told him

Even if you’ve said the story before, he’ll listen in full and always have a different smart ass remark every time

Highkey nags you

AND Highkey roasts you!!

He thinks it’s soooo cute when you roast back

Isn’t afraid to tell the waiter when they get your order wrong at the restaurant

When he gives you his sweaters he is LAUGHINGGGGGGGGGG

Bc why is it so big on you??? GROW UP!!

He’ll take a million pictures of you in his sweater tho that’s his pride and joy for like a week

Protective of you but not in the overbearing way

Team: I hate everybody you hate

he always makes sure you know that’s he’s got you,,, whatever it is

Bickering every two minutes

Sometimes y’all will randomly make eye contact and he’ll wink or bite his lip jokingly and even tho you’re like “ewwwwww” he knows his job is done

he just likes making you cringe

Always encourages you to try new things and getting you to step out of your comfort zone - he wants u to live the best life possible

Enjoys helping you pick out your outfits

He will literally sit on your bed and watch u play dress up

“Wait spin around” AND HE GOES “WOOOOOOOOOOO” AND THEN YOU’LL KNOW THE OUTFIT IS THE ONE

Is also very extra when he compliments you

His goal is to make you blush

Has like 4 second FaceTimes with you bc he wants to show you the thing,,,, he can’t just tell you about it,,, you HAVE to see it

Is sometimes so deadpan you have to be like …… are you joking …. or... but with time you get the hang of it

Likes going on adventures late at night

You will literally see new cities thru his eyes

He’ll bring you to his favourite places and he’s adamant on seeing everything in one day

Likes to try cooking new recipes with u

Has no trouble with meeting your parents,,, they literally love him bc his presence is so??? Welcoming!!

Thinks about you in every action he does

A lot of “I picked this up for you, ya know, just because” gifts

Is the type to be petty when you’re mad at him

He’ll literally tighten the jars, put your things in high places so you HAVE to talk to him

SUPER RANDOMLY FLIRTATIOUS WITH YOU

BUT ITS SO FUNNY BC HE ACTS LIKE HE DOESN'T KNOW U AND HE GOES HARDDDDDD

like “oh do you come here often?”

And you’re just like “I know you’re just trying to make up for the time when we first met and u couldn’t remember your own name”

He takes care of u so well when you’re sick and doesn't care if he gets sick too

Makes sure you take all your medicines and checks your forehead for a fever all the time

While Johnny may tease you all the time, he knows your worth and he is always pushing you to be better. He’s in awe of your abilities and prides himself in being your number one fan

[boldlyvoid]

can u do a blurb about reader wanting a baby and asking her co-worker Spencer to be the donor because he's smart and nice and she wants a cute baby?

you said blurb and i read 2K word fic apparently lmao

Late nights behind a desk were the worst. Y/N hated reading over case file, after case file, of horrific things as she tried to choose where they went next.

The only plus side was that she wasn’t alone, Spencer was at his desk just beside her. Like he always was. They had an interesting friendship, to say the least.

Ever since Y/N joined the BAU, Spencer and her were glued at the hip. They had all the same interests, liked the same music and movies, and they spat out information the same way, they were like each other’s dorky other half— but it was just a friendship.

They had a tradition to watch at least one movie together after a case, to just chill for a bit together. Always randomly picking one of their apartments to go to, spending the night together until one of them eventually wandered off to bed. Leaving the other on the couch.

They weren’t aware of their feelings for each other for a while. Both of them being so used to being alone, and never having anyone be interested in them before. It was hard to understand if the feelings they had were pure friendship, or if it could ever be more. If the sex would fuck everything up and take away that perfect happy place they found in each other, or would it make the bond stronger?

She noticed the crush before Spencer showed any signs of liking her back. She woke up every morning thinking of him, that's when she came to the conclusion that it was more than just a friendship. She wanted him in her life forever, she wanted to kiss his perfect lips and hug his soft body, wake up beside his messy hair and just love him for the rest of eternity.

She sighed as she picked up another file, not excited to learn about the horrible acts taking place in what people called, “the best country in the world.” She’d disagree any day of the week.

This one was a file about some missing kids apparently being spotted in a van altogether in Georgia, it looked interesting enough to be the next case. She hated reading all the info, seeing every kid's happy face in the file knowing that’s not how they looked now.

“Good god,” she groaned as she flipped through the case.

“What’s wrong?” Spencer asked over the divider.

“Nothing,” she shrugged, “just a bad case.”

She handed it to him over the desk, hearing him flip through all the sheets as he read a million words a minute. “We should show this to Emily first thing,” Spencer agreed, pushing himself over to her desk in his wheely chair.

“I will,” she smiled softly, taking the file back from him and placing it on her desk.

Spencer stood then, making his way into her space and rubbing his hand over her back slightly. “Are you okay?”

She sighed, “actually. no, I was telling Garcia I want to have a baby soon, and then I see things like this and I’m scared to do it alone but I don’t have any other option?” Ranting to him like he was her therapist.

“What do you mean?”

She turned in her chair to look up at him, his soft brown eyes really caring to hear the answer. “Sit,” she insisted.

He pulled the chair over more, sitting close enough that their knees touched. “I’m 36, I’m not having any luck finding a husband or a wife, I want a baby and if I have to do it myself I will, but what if I’m not enough? What if I have a boy and he grows up to be a killer cause he never had a dad?”

“Y/N,” Spencer’s voice was soft as he looked at her with a confused scrunch on his face. “That couldn’t happen, you’re a wonderful person, I love having you on the team and in my life, I know you’d raise good kids, you should do it.”

“Really?” She beamed at him, the words touching her heart and making her swoon a bit.

“I mean, it would be hard,” he added reason to the conversation. “You’d have to take time off, which would be good for bonding. My mother raised me alone and I turned out semi-fine, I don't hold any resentment for her not finding someone for me to call dad or even step-mom for that matter. I think if you give them all the love in the world like I know you’re capable of, your child will love you like you’re their whole world.”

She laughed as she noticed the tears welling in her eyes, waving her hand's in front of her face so she wouldn’t fully sob. “Do you want to be the donor?” She made a joke to change the topic.

Spencer laughed then too, “sure!”

Everything got serious again then, she looked at him a little differently. “Really? Cause honestly, you’re like a Grade A donor profile in the most expensive clinic!” She couldn’t help herself from laughing again at the absurdity.

“I’ve always wanted to be a dad, 40 isn’t too old to have a child, is it?” He seemed to have decided that rather fast.

“Okay,” she nodded with a smile, “okay. That’s cool, sick,” she felt the words get smaller as she thought it over.

“I get it if you were kidding,” Spencer spat out. “I realize now that you might have been making a joke, I hope it’s not weird that I agreed so fast, it’s just that I think you’re a very beautiful and smart woman and the idea of helping you make a child makes me really excited. I think it would be a very good idea if you were being serious, but I get it if you’re not.”

She let him get it all out, always loving when he got like this on a case or in person, nervous or just because he wanted to talk, she loved to listen. And no one ever let him finish his thoughts, always wanting to beat him to the punch.

“Spence, I think you’re really handsome and smart too,” she smiled. “If you’re also serious, I am too.”

“How would we?” He asked as he pulled at the top button of his dress shirt, swallowing like he couldn't breathe all of a sudden.

“If you’re not opposed, I’m sure the good old-fashioned way would work?” She laughed, laying her hand on his knee softly.

It was like sparks flew at that moment as if all the fluorescent lights in the bullpen could have exploded and she wouldn’t have even noticed. Captivated by Spencer's eyes as he gasped at her touch.

“Not opposed in the slightest,” he said softly as he held his own hand over hers.

She couldn’t help herself from smiling. “Well, I think I’m all done here if you want to come to my place for a movie?”

“Sure,” he replied, offering her a hand as they stood up together.

He returned his chair to his desk, both of them grabbing their coats and bags and rejoining at the door.

“I should go say goodnight to Penny,” Y/N said softly. “Wanna come?”

“Yeah,” he followed her through the door and down the hall to the tech room.

“Knock knock,” Y/N said as she walked through the open door. “Oh great and knowledgeable one, I’ve come with my nightly farewell.”

“Oh my knight, I shall miss you,” Penelope played along, sauntering over to her and wrapping her up in a hug. “I leave you with this until your return.”

“Through scorching deserts, and blistering winds, I will make it back to you, always,” she tried not to laugh as she hugged her back. “I also brought forth the jester.”

Spencer was laughing in the doorway as the two of them looked at him, “hi?”

“The pretty boy, to what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Um,” Y/N smiled, “Spencer and I are just going back for our nightly movie.”

Penelope looked at both of them, jaw slightly gaped, “nightly? I thought it was a case by case thing?”

“It’s a good excuse for us to talk,” Spencer smiled at her.

“Mhmm,” she smirked, “well have fun.”

She pulled Y/N back into another hug, hiding her face from Spencer, “I need all the dirty deets in the morning.”

Y/N smacked her arm softly as she pulled back, “goodnight pretty penny.”

“Farewell brave knight, handle with care, Jester,” Penelope pointed her finger at him, giving him a knowing glance.

“Yes, oh Knowledgeable one, always,” he blushed.

He reached out his hand for Y/N, interlocking their fingers as they left her office and headed towards the elevator. A rare moment of bravery on his part, holding hands like this didn’t spread a lot of germs.

“We’re going to have to discuss a lot of logistics like realistically this isn’t going to be just a fuck and oh look its a baby. This is a real live baby that we need to raise and care for,” she reminded him as the elevator doors shut.

“I’d like to be as involved as you’d let me be,” Spencer replied. “I don’t have to be 'dad' to them, I could be uncle Spence that’s fine too.”

“Oh no, you’d be Dad for sure,” she nudged him slightly. “I mean like, weekends and holidays and birthdays, your mom will want to see them surely, my parents will want to see them. Housing,” she looked at him horrified. “I have an apartment with 2 bedrooms, I don’t think I could let them sleep somewhere without me.”

“I have been looking at houses,” Spencer added before the doors opened to the garage, “you’re driving right?”

“Yeah, you were saying?” She replied, digging her keys out of her purse and leading him towards the car.

“Derek Morgan, I’m not sure if you’ve met him yet, he fixes up old homes in DC and Virginia now. He just finished one and I helped him with it. I think I’m going to buy it from him. It has 4 bedrooms, we could all live under the same roof? It would be easier to co-parent.”

She was amazed at how fast he adapted to this as if he’d been having the same thoughts she was having. At a certain point wanting kids becomes a pipe dream filled with desperation and emptiness, he looks like he’s experienced it too.

She opened her door and sat down before replying to him again. Thinking about how wonderful he was going to be during this process, “thank you, Spencer.”

“For what?” He asked as they both closed their doors.

She sighed, relaxing into her seat as she started the car. She turned to him softly, not wanting to cry as she spoke softly. “Being a mom is more of a dream to me than joining the BAU was, this is the best gift you could give me.”

He reached his hand out again, holding it softly. Running his thumb over her knuckles. “Can I tell you a secret?”

“Yeah,” she nodded softly.

He couldn’t make eye contact with her, staring at their hands as he rubbed her skin.

“Um, I’ve been pretty infatuated with you since you joined,” he let it out finally. Like a ton of bricks off his back he relaxed a bit, “after everything with Maeve, Cat and Max… oh god, and JJ... I was so worried that if I got too close to you I’d lose you. I tried to keep the feelings in, that's why I said what I did to Penelope. She knows how I feel about you.”

It was like fireworks were going off in her chest as the butterflies erupted inside of her. She sat up, turning to him more and ripping her hand from his grasp.

It startled him, he looked at her anxiously as if she was going to yell at him. But she placed both hands on his cheeks and pulled him into a kiss.

His arms snaked around her waist, wishing they could get closer if it wasn’t for the damn centre console of her car. Pressing their lips together, hard, as they breathed each other in. Desperation taking control, she wasn’t able to let go of him.

When she finally did pull away, however, the look on his face was priceless. Like expensive art, every line and freckle had a meaning. He was surprised, enamoured, grateful, desperate for more.

She smiled softly, rubbing her thumbs over his cheek. “Good, cause it would be awkward having your baby and not getting to love you every day too.”

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