#I’m thinking extremely fucked ideas about this

[yeta-drewit]

I just KNOW the moment Wednesday season 2 is out, and they continue this gay vibes from the novelization of season 1, people are going to be screaming about how platonic relationships are dead in media.

I am surprised to learn that as of late people have been criticizing gay shipping for “erasing” platonic relationships, that by making every platonic relationship into a gay ship we are giving the idea that every interaction is inherently romantic and influencing the children into not understanding the difference between romantic and platonic relationships.

I want to start this by saying that I do believe that a lot of people don’t understand the difference between romantic and platonic relationships, but I don’t think it comes from gay shipping, I believe this development comes from many things. One example could be how society pressures people to find a relationship which leads to desperation and purposefully blurring the lines between romance and friendship because it’s better to have someone, even if you don’t really love them romantically and just enjoy their company, than to have no one. Another example could be how society used to have a heteronormative idea of relationships, if we all believed ourselves to be straight, than it was easy to just say “if I’m a woman all the women I get along with I only see as platonic, but if I get along with a man I must see it as romantic”, but now that we are expanding on the possibility that people of all genders can be both platonically or romantically involved with anyone of any gender, we are having to face the fact that romantic and platonic feelings are not solid concepts and we have to get philosophical with what is love and what constitutes love, and most people don’t like to think about that so they keep to their heteronormativity.

This are but only 2 reasons why I believe people don’t understand platonic and romantic relationships but I haven’t heard anyone say that because they be blaming gay shipping. I’m going to say that like with anything in life this has nuance and you can argue all you want but I’m going to say that I genuinely believe a good part of the people saying this argument are homophobes.

By stating gay shipping you are ultimately also adding gay relationships, gay shipping is just a step below from queer representation. So ultimately you are making the same homophobic argument that queer relationships shouldn’t be portrayed in media because it would confuse the masses and the children. We have fallen into the idea that complicated concepts as romantic and platonic relationships should be dumbify to appeal to a larger audience of straight people.

But I can hear someone argue “but shipping is a fandom thing not a show thing”. Well someone has been living under a rock because nowadays fandoms are an extension of the show, we are social media people, we thrive in social engagement in these online communities and fandom culture has been on the fucking rise. We can’t ignore that what happens within a fandom is how people ultimately portrayed the show, it’s the reason why a lot of people don’t watch things like mha because the fandom is weird and not because the show is bad. So by criticizing gay shipping within a fandom you are ultimately criticizing it as if it was part of the show.

Which leads me to Wenclair. I believed season 2 is truly going to be coming in a horrible time to be a minority, as people have been growing more homophobic and racist as time goes on. So people are going to extremely criticize the Wenclair ship, not because it’s a toxic or immorally wrong ship, but because it’s gay. People would criticize the show because they are going to go from friends to lovers. They would argue so much about the fact Wenclair is erasing a platonic relationship that they would forget that a foundation for many straight ships and real life relationships is friendship.

I don’t think friendship in media is dying. Within my example of Wenclair there are multiple moments of true friendships in the show. A big part of the Wednesday show was Wednesday learning to have allies and people she can trust to help her, but people would ignore does messages to jump about the fact the two main girls of the show are seen as more than platonic EVEN THOUGH BOTH OF THEM HAVE SOLID FRIENDSHIPS OUTSIDE OF THE SHIP. It’s almost like the only problem is that they are both girls, because let’s be honest NO ONE is saying the same thing about straight ships, they straight ships are always super romantic and completely fine, even though we could argue that does ships also can confused people as to what is romantic and what is platonic.

And before anyone comes for me arguing that I’m taking this too far and that I’m just a sad gay who doesn’t understand we NEED same gender platonic representation (like we haven’t had enough of that in hundreds of centuries of media 😀) and that I’m just mad people criticize my gay ship. I am going to hold your hand and say. I don’t care if you hate a ship. You can tell me all you want that Xavier or Tyler are better potential partners for Wednesday and I would let you because that’s your constitutional given right, BUT if you are criticizing the ship not by personal preference but from the eyes of homophobia I am going to be mad and I’m going to be annoyed by it, because queer representation has JUST been on the rise, you can’t already be mad at it WHEN IT JUST STARTED. WATCH ANY SHOW IN ANY GENRE AND YOU WOULD FIND SAME GENDER COMPLETELY PLATONIC RELATIONSHIPS, SO WHY MUST YOU BE MAD AT THE SLIGHT POSSIBILITY OF A SHOW DOING ONE, ONE!, CONTRADICTION TO THE NORM.

Shipping and canon gay relationships are not going to take away friendship, they are just helping people understand that there is not one way of being in love or one way of being involved with someone of the opposite gender, we are not stopping friendships. I would make the argument we are increasing it by making people analyze their interactions with people of even the opposite gender through the eyes of it being platonically. Because now gender is not a factor in friendships, you can be friends with anyone of any gender. Shipping shouldn’t be confusing you about it, you should think critically and analyze what you consider love.

[mouthpoisons]

done begging for people to please listen to why this is abysmal and I’m fucked off now. if you actually seriously wanna go ahead and blindly accept this extremely blatant ''how can i covertly spin my no homoism into something that sounds woke, oh i know, ill throw the cripples under the bus because nobody's going to gaf about the integrity of Their rep enough to push back'' move as your ''eh whatever a win is a win'' asexual representation then sure

enjoy your ace rep; a physically disabled man, initially introduced as confident and flirty, who goes on to spend half of his screentime developing an abusive relationship with his body and his base human need to be loved thanks to the devastating affects of a degenerative terminal illness, and the other half of his screentime a resurrected-against-his-will nullified zombie being manipulated and puppeted around by the Magical Hubris Object he invented in a desperate attempt to save his own life - an act the narrative loves disproportionately punishing him for. someone who is either feeling his body dying all around him and is acting understandably but tragically ''uninterested'' and closed off (his “asexual vibe/coding'' i fucking guess), or is quite literally the de-sexed disabled person trope.

as a physically disabled gay asexual who knows i deserve better on all possible accounts i think you are fucking stupid at best, and a willfully ignorant enemy at worst. the consequences of cl's anti-jayvik rollout are very seriously threatening to take viktor from being a flawed but overall really good and refreshingly heartfelt narrative about a gay disabled man who Despite It All allows himself and his body to be loved by the man hes been yearning for, into like actual i-cant-keep-making-excuses-for-this-writing straight up stereotypical, toeing the line of eugenicist horseshit

A tacked on poorly/not at all researched label that the writer in question only raised as his “intent” to try and shut down the idea that viktor ever finds love, as part of an ongoing homophobic crashout, is recontextualising his nuance and effectiveness as a disabled character, and eventhough a lot of you agree that he would also be bad asexual rep you’re way too willing to just shrug and move on instead of giving ANY consideration to how all this is carelessly damaging this character in other contexts

his declining health and impending death, and the knock-on effect of developing a toxic relationship with his body and the concept of emotion and weakness, his ability/willingness to be loved, along with his desperate quest to cure himself causing him to isolate and overwork (“marry to his work”), these are the things you’re willing to allow that man to gaslight you into accepting as ~asexual coding~. Fucking congrats. I hope the collateral was worth it

[mythalism]

Do you find yourself in almost a state of mourning/grief with datv? I’m literally in an almost emotional distress over it. All summer I built up insane defensiveness due to all the grifter hate train bullshit brewing for it with a dose of insane excitement since I’ve been a DA girlie since Origins 2009 release date and I just… don’t know how to process my feelings?!?

Due to the pre game discourse I almost feel programmed to fight criticism for it and during a new play through I keep having “holy shit that quest was so dialed in” followed immediately by “what the hell did I just listen to” and yet my brain is still in copium mode.

DA fandom discourse has always been poisoned with garbage takes, ESPECIALLY since Solas got introduced with DAI (I’m sorry, I truly believe his die hard haters have the reading comprehension of a peanut) but the fact that there is still a huge pocket of the fandom that couldn’t even get the point of the solas/mythal dynamic when it was LITERALLY SPOONFED TO US kind of… scares me about the future of narrative design in general.

Absolutely development hell and reboot and lack of time to truly sink into the intended story beats from start to finish played a major role. The skeleton remains of bullshit multiplayer factions are here too. But holy shit. Is it just me or does everything else utterly scream “chronically online” to me.

Sorry I have no idea where I’m going with this. I just needed to yap thoughts that weren’t just in the void. I don’t know how to reconcile getting my dream romance ending I waited 10 years for alongside a narrative that doesn’t even make sense leading to that happy ending.

i wouldn't say im experiencing full on grief but i do know exactly what you mean and i sympathize with your experience a lot. i think it might be because ive been in a corner of fandom that has been very critical of bioware and so i honestly had extremely low expectations of veilguard up until the summer. i thought we would NEVER get the game, and if we did get it, i was sure it would be a fucking trainwreck after 10 years of "[insert x developer here] leaves bioware after 20+ years!". my personal bar was truly on the floor, in the deep roads, in the heart of a titan, in the void etc etc.

it does bother me the way it was marketed because honestly i would call it duplicitous. not in the "false advertising" legal sense of the world but in the way it feels like the devs are (and were) very aware of the flaws in this game and more importantly were very aware of how it would be received by long-time fans. and of course i am aware that developers have little to no say whatsoever in marketing, and its also clear that vg's marketing was an absolute mess of conflicting directions considering that reveal trailer that honestly set the game up to fail (i truly believe the grifting and general, casual reception would not have been so negative if they had used the release-date trailer instead) and the way they immediately had to drop 20 minutes of gameplay to reassure people that they werent releasing dragon age: fortnite LMFAO. but i think that mismatch actually tells us a lot about the similarly contradictory tone and writing in different parts of the game, and the direction that EA seemingly pushed for (as exemplified by their attempts to market it as... whatever that was) and the game bioware was attempting to make (which would have undoubtedly been flawed but probably more in-line with past games).

but, this duplicitous marketing was not just EA, and i do feel that the devs played up the game, and specifically our attachment to past characters and franchise entries, in a way that was a bit unfair when you have the context of their comments post-release about how aware they are of it's shortcomings. and i get it, these people have quite literally no choice. they have to participate in the marketing of this game, it's their job, they need to pay rent and eat etc etc like i get it. but just because they have good reason to play on their fan's attachment to their writing via their tweets and comments in dev q&a's doesn't mean i cant say it left a bad taste in my mouth. i think trick being completely absent from the entire marketing cycle is really interesting in this context, lol. i have no proof of there being a correlation, it was just something i found interesting this summer, and that i find even more interesting now, especially considering their role as lead writer.

it definitely felt like the things they chose to show and the things they chose not to were designed specifically to grip fans and rile us up, and though it worked for their pre-sales, i think it actually hurt them in the end because if they had not gotten expectations up so high by dangling varric and solas and morrigan and the inquisitor in front of us like carrots, we probably would not all have been so disappointed! i sure wouldnt be. remember i thought this game was going to fucking blow not even 8 months ago! for me it was precisely the summer build up that left me so bereft in the end. if i had played the game completely blind id still think it was a flop, but i wouldn't feel absolutely bamboozled and pissed off in the way i and a lot of others seem to feel.

legend @scaryanneee said once that the entire game feels apologetic, in both its writing and design and that has stuck with me ever since she said it. the whole game feels like a big "sorry it wasnt better", and even more so due to the release of the artbook filled with ideas that they knew we'd like better, and even MORE so with the game's lack of denuvo or other anti-piracy software, allowing us to data-mine and see the skeleton left behind at some point. idk a lot about game development but i am under the impression that post-release content that feels like a desperate apology to fans + tweets about how you fought and lost that then get deleted are not the norm????

its truly a mess. but i do not feel hopeless, for some reason. gaming is a mess and i think you are right to fear for the future of narrative design but although there are always people who will bootlick to cope, there are also beloved haters like us who will always complain, and not out of transphobia or a desire to grift, but out of a genuine love for these games and the stories they tell. i wish the reviews had been a bit more discerning and critical, but i hope the message will get through to bioware and EA eventually. i also think that tbh, if this game came out 3 years after bg3 rather than 1, it would look VERY different. i would not even really consider myself a bg3 fan and i have a lot of criticisms of it (lol who's surprised!!!) it is objectively a move in the right direction for the gaming industry for a variety of reasons, and i do believe its many accolades have sent a message to greedy execs everywhere.

[jaded-ghoster]

SPOILERS FOR MHA 431!!! my thoughts on the epilogue (the roughly translated leaks of it, anyway) are as follows:

Of course he’s fucking dead, and thank god he is? Would you rather he lie there paralyzed for the rest of his, teetering on brain dead, life? rip my man but lets be real

Ochako is beautiful god bless her

I still don’t exactly see MHA as a shippy manga, and so even with the ending i’m not seeing it as a “oh my god they’re gonna get married and have kids,” im seeing it as a look into the future. They’re gonna put themselves, and each other, first for once. They’re gonna spend more time with each other because they were such close friends and they haven’t had a chance until now to really settle down! And if they do end up together (which the blushing kinda implies they might dabble in) then good for them and that’s fucking adorable

Since when does a canon ship stop anyone from writing a gay fanfic? live and let live

I’m actively killing myself over Deku not forming an agency with Bakugo

perhaps that’s counterproductive to my former point

HAHAHAHAHAHA HE’S FIFTEENTH HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

there’s no way iida can beat him this is straight rage bait im sorry iida stans, i guess he does win in terms of chivalry though

WHERE THE FUCK IS AIZAWA? but no news is good news to me, i bet he’s thriving

I personally thought the idea of Toga pushing her to live her life to the fullest and not let old guilt hold her down was really beautiful, but I definitely wanted more for my girl than that. but tbh that’s not the epilogue’s fault if she was set up to die since a while ago

Bakugo isn’t married stop being delusional about a couple pixels on his finger

I don’t think the leaks are fake, that’s kind of extreme of any leaker to do, and the definition of fake also does not extend to Horikoshi’s assistants working on it. Not to me, anyway. However, if they are fake, that’s about to be the funniest fucking thing in 2024

Um I didn’t really pay attention to the rest #haveMyBabiesMirko

[jihyoruri]

ME GIVE US PARANOIA MOMENTS RIGHT NOW PLEASE

as you wish‼️ (I decided to not do moments and do something else but it’s still paranoia crumbs)

the video opens with yn, jaehyun , and wonbin standing stiffly in a line in front of the camera. the atmosphere already feels chaotic as wonbin nudges jay to start the intro. jay stumbles forward dramatically, crashing into yn which causes her to stumble back into the counter.

she cuts her eyes at both boys who who just look straight at the camera avoiding her gaze,“Idiots,” she adds under her breath, while the staff behind the camera stifles their laughter.

“we are going to make cookies.” jay says with a big smile towards the camera, putting both his arms around yn and wonbin’s shoulders.

“you didn’t even introduce our name.” wonbin glares at jay who ignores him.

“they know who we are!” yn huffs, shrugging jay’s arm off aggressively. she then turns to the camera with an exaggerated sweet smile. “anyway, like the angel I am, I came up with this idea to bake cookies for our seniors.”

the camera pans to jay and wonbin who give yn a get real look, she didn’t even want to do it.

“what!?” she exclaims causing both of them to flinch and mumble nothing.

wonbin, trying to salvage the intro, gestures behind the camera. “like yn said, we’re making cookies... from scratch. but, uh, our staff is here to supervise us because apparently—”

“they don’t trust us in the kitchen,” jay whispers conspiratorially, leaning toward the camera like he’s sharing some forbidden secret.

“yeah, probably because someone almost burned down the microwave last week,” yn says, glaring at him.

“that was an accident!”

“making popcorn doesn’t need a microwave tutorial!” yn says rolling her eyes.

“ANYWAY,” Wonbin cuts in, pinching the bridge of his nose, “we’re making fudge cookies because they’re dark and what’s paranoia without a dark vibe? let’s get started.”

the clip cuts to the trio mid argument, voices overlapping as they bicker over who should measure the flour.

“you both suck at measurements!” yn snaps, clutching the measuring cups tightly as jay and wonbin try to wrestle them from her. “I should do it!”

“you’re literally the worst at measurements!” jay fires back, grabbing at the cups. “give me the damn measuring cups before you screw it up!”

“no!” yn retorts, pulling back with enough force to almost knock over a bag of sugar.

“yn,” wonbin cuts in, pinching the bridge of his nose like a stressed parent about to lose it. “go get the chocolate chips.”

“what? no! I can—”

“go,” wonbin repeats firmly, pointing to the pantry. his expression screams that he’s two seconds away from quitting the video altogether.

yn glares at him, clinging to the cups for a moment longer before shoving them into jay’s hands with a muttered, “fine. but fuck you.”

the editors bleep out the curse with a comically loud censor sound as yn storms off camera to get the chocolate chips.

jay smirks, holding up the measuring cups like a trophy. “see? problem solved. I’m the adult here.”

“jay, if you mess this up, I’m going to lose it,” wonbin warns.

the clip cuts to jay immediately spilling half the flour as wonbin facepalms while yn’s laughs are heard from off camera.

just like the intro of the video the three stand stiffly in front of the camera, jay has some flower on his face, wonbin has some chocolate on his white shift while yn eats a bunch of chocolate chips from the palm of her hand.

“they’re in the oven!” jay cheers extremely loud, “I think that went pretty smoothly.”

“no it didn’t.”

“are you dumb?”

yn and wonbin responded at the same time.

jay opens his mouth to defend himself, but yn cuts him off by grabbing another handful of chocolate chips and popping them into her mouth. “honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if these cookies send them straight to the toilet,” she says casually, chewing as wonbin turns to glare at her.

“yn.”wonbin’s voice is sharp, his gaze locked on her chocolate covered hand.

“what?” she mouths back silently, holding his stare like she did absolutely nothing wrong.

“should we, like… actually be giving these to them if that’s even a possibility?” jay asks, wiping the flour off his face, his tone genuinely concerned.

the three of them fall silent, staring at each other for a long, awkward moment as if they’re contemplating the true consequences of their actions.

finally, in perfect unison, they all shrug and say, “nah.”

the screen freezes on their unapologetic expressions, followed by the text “please do not look at these three as role models.”

“while we wait for the cookies to bake, we should probably clean up—cause, you know, we’re responsible people,” yn says to the camera about to take another handful of chocolate chips but wonbin slapped her hands away.

“we’re pretty good at cleaning, so this should go really fast,” jay chimes in, his voice way too upbeat for the situation.

the clip suddenly cuts to jay, who has just slipped on a patch of flour, falling flat on his back with a loud thud.

the camera holds on jay for a second, and then quickly pans to yn, who’s doubled over with laughter, clutching her stomach like she might pass out. she’s leaning against wonbin for support, but he’s torn—half of him is trying to figure out if jaehyun is okay, while the other half is quietly suppressing a laugh.

“jay?” wonbin asks, his face a mix of concern and disbelief, “you good?”

jaehyun groans from the floor, holding his head, weakly nodding.

yn, now bent over in laughter again, mutters between breaths, “I swear, you’re a walking disaster.”

“I think they look pretty good,” jay says confidently, looking over the batch of cookies as wonbin carefully carries the tray to the counter, like it’s the most precious thing in the world.

“but do they taste good?” yn asks skeptically, already reaching for one. she takes a bite, chews, and then immediately passes it to jaehyun. he takes a bite too, then hands it over to wonbin, who finishes off the last piece with a thoughtful look.

they all chew in silence, before looking at each in shock.

“...they actually taste good,” wonbin says slowly, as if trying to process the miracle that’s just occurred.

“woah.” jay says before reaching for another one.

“I’m in shock,” yn says, casually grabbing a couple more and walking off camera to give them to the staff.

she walks back into the camera while the three of them look at the staff with bright smiles while the staffs sounds of delighted hums are heard in the background.

“you hear that?” yn says, raising an eyebrow and grinning at the camera. “that’s the sound of them tasting heaven.”

“I’m excited to give these to our seniors.” jay says grabbing another cookie.

“I’m just shocked that they actually taste good,” wonbin admits, still staring down at the cookies like they’re a rare artifact. “like, no joke. this might be our best achievement yet.

“okay so, apparently red velvet, nct, aespa sunbaenim, are here today.” yn says to the camera as she’s casually perched on Jaehyun’s back, both of them walking into the building.

“they’re gonna get a real good taste of our cookies.” jay exaggerates.

“cookies that I’m still shocked came out so well,” wonbin adds.

the clip cuts to them walking into a room with one of the small boxes that has some of their cookies inside it.

the camera pans to mark and johnny who look at the group confused as they look at the camera.

“what’s going on?” mark asks, laughter lacing his voice. the trio’s antics have him on edge, he knows they’re never up to anything too simple.

“we made you guys cookies,” yn says with a cheeky grin, holding the box out to johnny, who eyes it with suspicion.

“did you guys put rat poison in it?” mark askes causing them to gasp in offence.

jay’s voice cuts in, “they taste good, I swear

“surprisingly good,” wonbin mutters, still looking at the cookies like they might spontaneously combust.

mark and johnny exchange a hesitant glance before each of them takes a cautious bite. the room falls into an expectant silence as they chew then both of them freeze. their eyes widen in shock.

“wait…” mark says, shaking his head in disbelief, trying to process the flavor.

“-that’s actually good.” johnny says going for another bite, “where did you guys buy this from cause no way you made it.”

“wowwwwww.” all three say in offence.

the clip cuts to the trio walking into the room, energetically singing red flavour at the top of their lungs, holding a small box of cookies.

seulgi laughs at the sight, clearly amused by the chaos unfolding in front of her, while the others watch in confusion. yn, still belting out the chorus, passes the box of cookies to yeri with a wink.

wendy eyes the box curiously as she opens it, staring at the cookies before turning her gaze back to the trio, who are still happily singing. "you guys made us cookies?" she asks, skepticism clear in her voice.

"It tastes good, we promise," yn says, trying to hold back her laughter. "even we are shocked." she walks over to seulgi and plops down on her lap, throwing an arm around her shoulders. "trust us."

the three red velvet members take a a cookie from the box and hesitantly take a bite.

there’s silence, before they all look at each other in shock.

"woah,” yeri breaks the silence, her eyes wide in surprise. she grabs another cookie with a grin, clearly impressed.

"that’s really good," wendy says, reaching for another one too. "I didn’t expect it to taste this good."

“we told you.” jay and wonbin say at the same time.

seulgi, still laughing at the unexpected success, raises an eyebrow. "they're actually really good. Who did you guys get to make them for you?" she asks, her voice dripping with playful curiosity.

thw entire room bursts into laughter, and yn, still comfortably in seulgi’s lap, winks mischievously. "we made them," she says with confidence . "from scratch."

the clip cuts to jay running into the room, attempting an impressive (but slightly uncoordinated) cartwheel. he lands with a dramatic stance , nearly knocking over a nearby table, while yn and wonbin follow closely behind, each holding a box of cookies

“special delivery.” jay says in a high pitched voice the room goes silent for a moment before the members burst into laughter, covering their mouths in shock at the chaotic entrance.

“what is going on?” giselle laughs, looking at the trio in disbelief, while yn quickly shoves the box into her hands.

“we made cookies.” wonbin says opening the lid, like it was a box of treasure, “from scratch, impressive right?”

ningning looks at the box warily. “I don’t know if I want to eat that...” she says, making winter giggle and nod in agreement.

karina, still processing the chaos, keeps her gaze fixed on yn, who stares back at her, unfazed. “just try it, it’s really good,” yn says, offering a reassuring smile

the girls exchange skeptical glances but cautiously pick up a cookie, all except karina, who’s still eyeing it suspiciously. yn, with a sigh of mock frustration, grabs the cookie from karina’s hand and pops it into her own mouth, causing the entire room to burst into laughter.

karina’s eyes widen, shocked by yn’s bold move, but her attention quickly shifts back to the cookie as she chews. one by one, the other girls’ expressions change from skepticism to surprise as they start to chew.

“this is really good,” ningning says, reaching for another cookie, her earlier doubts forgotten.

“no way you guys made this,” giselle shakes her head, still in shock, unable to believe it.

“better believe it.” jay said proudly.

karina, finally accepting the cookie’s legitimacy, watches yn and grabs another one. “thank you for shoving that cookie in my mouth,” she says, her voice dripping with sarcasm, “this is so good.” the room erupts in laughter, everyone enjoying karina’s playful tone

“no problem dude.” yn says nonchalantly causing karina to shoot her a scolding look.

the clip transitions to a new scene with bold, playful bubble letters reading “yn’s iphone” at the top of the screen. yn is lying on her bed, holding her phone in one hand while wonbin is next to her, both of them looking at the screen

“the cookies definitely tasted good,” yn starts,, “but everyone ate so much of them that, well… it did indeed send us to the toilet.” she glances at wonbin, who nods solemnly in agreement, his expression mock serious.

as if on cue, the sound of a toilet flushing is heard in the background, followed by jay’s voice shouting from the bathroom, “I regret everything!”

yn and wonbin exchange amused glances, trying to stifle their laughter. they burst out giggling, barely able to keep it together.

the video cuts abruptly, with both of them still laughing uncontrollably in the background.

[shikamarusgirll]

nsfw alphabet with Shikamaru?

im so sorry this took so long! I’m currently sick with a cold, so I’ve been doing what i can!! More content soon!

SHIKAMARU NARA NSFW ALPHABET

A = Aftercare

Despite Shikamaru being lazy and thinking nearly EVERYTHING is a drag.. but since your his girlfriend.. he feels as if it’s only the right thing to do. He’ll leave the bedsheet cleaning to you, but afterwards, he will let you rest your head on his chest while you quickly fall asleep, and so does he. Probably mutters a few things under his breath before drifting off soon after you with his arm around your waist! 

———-

B = Body part (his favourite on you)

Shikamaru is such an ass guy, that being said he prefers a girl with a little more in the back, it’s something nice he can take an occasional glance at when you walk up the stairs infront of him.

————-

C = Cum

Whenever you two are doing reverse-cowgirl or doggystyle, he adores pulling out and cumming on your ass or your lower back, it’s just a turn-on for him, if not, he’d prefer to do it on your stomach or above your aching cunt

————-

D = Dirty Secret

Shikamaru’s dirty secret is that he sort of liked the idea of you holding his blunt in your mouth for him while he goes down on you, something about high-sex just gets him off so bad..

—————

E = Experience

Eh.. honestly, your most likely his first. Despite how he comes off, he’s not the type to have sex with a girl if he doesn’t plan to settle with them, so he saved his virginity until he felt that way.

But don’t take that as he doesn’t know what he’s doing.. because god, he does, an extremely quick learner.

————-

F = Favourite Postion

Like said before, he likes doggystyle, but if he’s feeling lazy (per usual), then he’ll have you ride him. Although this doesn’t mean that he won’t be doing any work, he’ll rub circles on your thighs, give you teasing praises, place his hands on your waist as you roll your hips against him

“Good job baby.. doin’ so well f’me, don’t worry.. I’ll make sure you get a break later, I’ll fuck this pussy good for you, mkay?”

—————-

G = Goofy

Cracks a joke once or twice, but it’s nothing too often, probably just mocking the way you sound, but it never lasts long because his breath gets shaky when he feels your velvety walls suck him in.

————-

H = Hair

He grooms occasionally, he doesn’t mind his pubic hair growing out, but once it’s too long he’ll cut it, finding it unpleasant. But he does usually have a bit of hair down there, but it’s tamed, not bushy.

—————

I = Intimacy

Believe it or not, Shikamaru is quite the intimate guy. Everytime you guys have sex, he does it as if it was the very first time, he likes to take his time with you, no need to rush. 

His lips peppering kisses down your neck until they reach your breasts, swiping his tongue over your hardened nipple, his hands caressing over your waist as he guides your hips against his cock, gosh, he can’t get enough of you, he’s so inlove with you.

—————-

J = Jack off

He does it occasionally, but that’s only if he’s high and you’re not around to.. ‘assist’ him.

——————

K = Kink/s

Okay hear me out.. he likes to restrain you with his shadows.

I KNOW IT SOUNDS ODD AT FIRST, but it’s Shikamaru’s personal way of bondage (with your consent of course), it’s funny because it was actually your idea, not his. And you were joking when you mentioned it too! But once the thought lingered into his mind.. he could already feel himself harden at the thought of your wrists being restrained by his shadows so you couldn’t push his wrists away when he was fingerfucking you.

—————

L =  Location

Nobody can convince me that Shikamaru doesn’t like doing it on the couch. That’s his go-to, aside from the bed of course.

The best part is when you two are sharing a blunt on the couch, him laying on his back with his head against the armrest and you straddling his lap, his hand snaking up to your waist as he pulls you down, your chest pressed against his, taking one more inhale of the joint before pulling you into a kiss, his other hand on the back of your neck while he blows the smoke into your mouth.

(Might make a drabble on that.. tell me if I should !!)

——————-

M = Motivation

Seeing you in general is a turn on because everything about you is perfect, but the one thing that gets him going is subtle touching, you carefully dragging your fingertips across his thigh, just to mess with him a bit.

———————

N = No

One of Shikamaru’s greatest requirements is consent. Without it, he won’t do anything. A nod, a special word, you simply saying ‘mhm’, gives him the green light. If he even senses that you’re uncomfortable with something, he’ll stop and let you know that it’s okay.

——————-

O = Oral 

Like Sasuke, he also prefers to receive, just something about him having a cigarette in his mouth, blowing out the smoke as he caresses your hair when you bob your head up and down on his cock, gagging from time-to-time when you can feel him hit the back of your throat, he lets out the hottest groans when he feels you gag around him. 

“takin’ it all like a good girl, aren’t you? yeahh i know..”

—————

P = Pace

Shikamaru goes slow and deep, never once has he alternated his pace, like I said, he likes to take his time with you, it’s more pleasurable that way.

—————

Q = Quickie

He is NOT a fan of those, he wants to have you all to himself in the moment.

—————-

R = Risk

Never been the guy who liked to take risks, the only risk he’d take is him not wearing a condom or you not being on the pill

—————-

S = Stamina

Shikamaru can go at least two rounds, if he goes a third, that one will be a little shorter, since he is the lazy type.

——————

T = Toys

He’s not opposed, never used them before but he’d be open if it was something your into.

——————

U = Unfair

The king of being ‘unfair’, the man is a pure tease, dragging his middle finger across your drenched slit, giving a hum when you jerk your hips closer to him, making jim laugh under his breath dryly.

“Just let me toy with you for a bit.. needy woman… yeah you want it? How bad baby?”

—————

V = Volume

He’s pretty quiet, there’s groans here and there (plenty) but mostly he’s fixated on the sounds you make, seeing what makes you feel good and what will push you over the edge 

—————

W = Wild?

Not really the wild type.

—————

X = X-ray

Shikamaru is sitting at a good 5.3 inches, and for you, it’s perfect. Nothing too big that would just be impossible to take, and nothing short that doesn’t feel good at all. He’s the perfect size.

—————

Y = Yearning

His sex drive can heavily depend, when he’s not smoking weed or whatever the case may be, it’s averagely low. But when he is? Oh boy. Sex is probably one of the only things he’s thinking about, aside from a nap and your lips wrapped around the tip of his cock.

—————

Z = Zzzz

Falls asleep nearly immediately, but he won’t do that without at least making sure your okay and that your cleaned up.. as for the bedsheets, he just lets out a groan and says “what a drag.. well clean them when we wake up, okay? C’mere.”

[godsweakestsoldier]

Oh to have Shannon be apart of this wip or not to have her be apart of it, that’s the question

[cream-and-tea]

i love love looooove doing whatever tf i want with structure in lay me down BEYOND belief. have just decided that chapter eleven is basically a romcom montage except it’s set in the evil apocalypse library and also there’s no romance and it also uhhhhhhh makes me want to cry ❤️

[gayabeilles]

me, a former homestuck cosplayer, seeing all the other alastor cosplayers at the con wearing gray facepaint:

[womb-complex]

ugh being the most awkward and timid coworker fucking suckksss

[steviescrystals]

one more rant about my layoff in the tags and then i’ll shut up i promise

[zaddyazula]

for the last 6 months i’ve been suffering the repercussions of separating myself from femininity since i was 6 years old

[gallavichsreddie1128]

FWB to Lovers w/ Logan

Description: How Y/N and Logan went from Fuck buddies to Lovers

Warning: Dirty talk

Ever since Y/N, Wade and Logan saved the timeline it has been a known thing that Logan and Y/N had tension and Wade always made it known: “UGH just fuck already Disney can just cut it out of the film.” “What?” 

Y/N tried to hide her feelings at first knowing that Logan probably wanted someone his age and not a younger woman with little to no experience. Boy was she wrong: “Wade’s right. We should fuck.” 

Though he said that drunk, Y/N couldn’t stop thinking about it. She was sure he wouldn’t remember saying that but the never next day when she just stared at him a little too long she was up against the wall in a second: “We need to hurry before Wade gets back.” 

He was huge compared to her and the size kink was real. For his age he had a nice body and a dick that hit all her special spots: “Fuck. I didn’t even know that spot could be reached.”

He took her on everything in that house. The couch, the wall, the beds (even Wade’s), shower, counter and even on a chair. Wade found out and his reaction wasn’t even surprising: “You guys can’t just fuck on my bed and not let me watch.” 

Y/N was falling hard for the man and Wade could tell. Her stares were no longer just filled with lust but love. She looked at him like he was the whole world and more: “OMG is the Y/N falling in love?” “Shut up!”

Logan was too and that showed when he found out that Y/N and Wade had slept together before. Though Y/N and Logan weren’t together and only supposed to be FWB, He got extremely jealous: “YOU GUYS HAVE SLEPT TOGETHER?” “Duh. Have you seen us? Two hot people fucking is the norm.” 

Y/N and Wade both found it odd that he got mad about that given it was 2 years ago and before any of this. Logan stormed off to his room ignoring them calling his name. Wade looked at Y/N with a knowing look: “Seems like your pussy is a love potion and he had too much of it.” 

Though it wasn’t the best idea, Wade went to talk to him about it. Y/N almost wanted to do it herself but Wade offered and said that he wouldn’t crack jokes about the situation: “Listen peanut, I understand that you have a bad boy reputation to stick too but that hard on you’re showing says you enjoyed the thought of it.” “WADE GET OUT!” 

Y/N couldn’t sleep that night. Her mind was on Logan and how he just stormed out of the room after hearing that they fucked. Did he love her back? She needed to know. She walked to his door and knocked, not caring if he was asleep or not: “Do you love me?” “Y/N, It’s 3 am.” 

He did in fact love her and he should’ve shown it better. Wade always wanted to get under his skin and that’s probably why he mentioned that: “I said that to get you two together. It’s annoying to see you guys act like Blind AL trying to find something.” 

Ok Wade maybe a little too far?

Both of them were idiots for not just admitting how they felt but now it was worth it in the end and Wade was to thank: “I’m not thanking you with Tacos!” “Well aren’t you just ungrateful?”

[cherry-leclerc]

can’t you see ☆ mv1

genre: redbull!driver, enemies to lovers, smut, lando and danny playing cupid lol, protective!max (although he won’t admit it), mean!max, sub!max, dom!reader

word count: 3.2k

In between your mutual dislike with your teammate, Lando and Daniel try their best to make you and Max uncover some hidden feelings.

nsfw warning under the cut!

18+...penetrative sex, riding, sucking on fingers

req!...quick one, but ahh first maxie drabble. eekk :)

“What a fucking asshole.”

Daniel’s eyes bulge out as he hands you a cup of coffee. It had been an extremely long day. Perhaps not the best idea to keep it going, but it seemed like the FIA didn’t give a shit about that. You were past being upset. You were seething. 

“Uh…Yeah. I mean I get it. I’m tired, too. This red flag came at the worst time-”

Briskly, you take the cup from him, cutting him off. “It’s not the red flag, it’s Max.” Ever since you joined Formula 1 as the first female to drive for Red Bull, you had felt welcomed by everyone. Everyone but your actual teammate. You had thought maybe it was because he had small balls and couldn’t handle the fact that you were driving alongside him, but when you confronted him about it, he only growled. 

As if you would ever cross my fucking mind.

Squinting, you point accusingly at the Australian. “You ought to stop being his friend.” He loudly laughs as he throws his head back. 

“You say that every time.”

Making a face, you shoot back. “And you never choose!”

“You’re both my friends. No one is winning custody.” 

“You’re older than both of us combined.”

“Hey!”

Hey, a low voice replies. The hairs on the back of your neck stand up. A shiver runs down your spine. Max leans up against the nearest wall as he ignores you and keeps his eyes on his friend. You wave your hand up in front of him a couple of times for good measure before your mouth drops open when he acts as if you were Casper the Friendly Ghost. 

“We were just talking abou- Ouch!” Daniel shrieks in pain when you pinch him. Faking a smile, you turn to the Dutchman. We were actually in the middle of something here. Nothing. He just keeps looking past you. Running a hand through his hair, he starts talking about how this all ‘ruined my flow’ and how he was going to have to ‘try to fix the FIA’s mistakes’. You have to laugh.

“Is something funny to you?”

You look around the room as you theatrically shudder. Sipping on the hot beverage, you hum and close your eyes. Max clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth as he crosses his arms in frustration. Cold weather, Danny. Do you think there’s a place nearby that sells homemade chicken soup?

“What the fuck is your problem?”

“If we find one, then maybe we can invite Lando and-” Suddenly, he reaches out for your cup and hot drops hit your hand. You hiss in pain. “What’s your problem, dickhead?”

Now, a normal reaction would be to be a decent human being and apologize. Offer up their own cup of coffee, perhaps. Not Max. Throwing it into the nearest trash bin, he turns to you. And he actually has the audacity to look upset.

“Why didn’t you let me overtake you? I don’t know if you don’t know this because you’re new or something like that, but here, when we are instructed to do something - we do it.”

Narrowing your eyes, you step closer. “So what? I don’t let you by one time and suddenly I’m the bad guy? Let me remind you that that’s all I’ve done for you this season.”

“Maybe when you’re someone’s number one driver then you won’t have to do shit like this, but until then,” he angles himself lower to you, “...It kinda looks like you have to.”

“Oh. No.” Daniel winces as he sips quietly on his hot drink. He can physically see your wheels turning as you glare back at the Dutchman. Your cheeks have turned light pink as you refrain yourself from yelling in front of all the Alpha Tauri engineers. Max scrunches his nose.

“Cute.”

You’re about to explode and let all hell loose, but just then, the red flag is over. Huffing, you grab your helmet as you walk away without sparing a single goodbye. Daniel frowns. “You need to stop treating her like that.” Max scoffs. Treating her how? The Australian inches closer as he lays a large hand on his friend's shoulder. “Like you don’t care.”

As soon as the race picks back up, you’re in the zone. You have to work twice as hard to overtake anyone in your way, considering most drivers were on new tires, but eventually you worked your way through. Drops of rain hit your visor as you slow down in sector 2. 

“Should I be worried about the rain?”

“Nothing to be worried about, just keep it up.”

You nod, even though Christian can’t see you. As you get closer, you can see Max’s rear wing. He’s fast - zooming, almost - but that only made you want it even more. Defend. I repeat, defend for a 1-2 finish. “Yeah. No.” Entering the DRS zone, you press down on the throttle as you try all tactics to catch up with the 3x World Champion. Fat drops of water hit the Red Bull as you squint in order to not get lost with the commotion. What are you doing? Defend. “I am defending.” You press harder. “Except I’m defending my spot. Not his.”

It’s almost as if he knows what you’re about to do. Quickly, he scans his sideview mirror as he curses when he sees  that you weren’t slowing down. It looks like the two Red Bulls are going head-to-head! Probably not the best idea at the moment considering the tough weather, Crofty announces. Passing Max by, you can’t help but cheer as you try to imagine his reaction. 

“Not what we were picturing, but very well executed. He will be defending now.”

It wasn’t planned to get stung by a boiling hot coffee, of course it wasn’t, despite the bickering between you two. It wasn’t planned to take time to scratch your burnt hand. And it most definitely was not planned to crash.

Plunging into the wall, you groan, curses flowing past your lips. Are you okay? “Yes. I’m okay.” Lifting your visor, you shyly wave at the grandstands. Would you mind going over to check on Max? He’s currently not responding. Your heart stops. Jumping off your seat, you climb out of your car as you turn and sure enough, Max’s Red Bull is ruined. 

“Are you alright?”

Throwing a thumbs up, he lifts himself out of his car to wave at the fans. He turns to you, dark blue helmet still over his head. “What the fuck was that all about?” You narrow your eyes.

“What do you mean? I got an itch.” And though he wears his helmet, you can’t help but notice the crinkles by his eyes. Your stomach flips. It's because of the crash. That’s all it is. You clear your throat. “What happened to you? You were driving well.” Professionally, he slides his gloves off as he waves over at the safety car.

“I had to check on you one way or another, right?”

Dumbfounded, you're faced with his back as he walks away.

-

“He’s into you, can’t you see it!”

“No. Jesus, don’t even say that.” Lando raises his brows as he throws his legs on top of your bed. Daniel hums from underneath the covers. He’s right, though. Pulling the sheets off, you scowl. “Don’t give me reasons to kick you both out.” Throwing yourself onto the mattress, you smile widely. “Soooo, what’s new?”

It’s all you three are ever good for. Pure gossip. Chewing hard on a piece of pizza, you gag. Daniel cackles as he reaches for the last slice. Hey! What if I wanted that? He cocks his head. Fine, you mumble.

“All I wanted was a warm soup.”

A gentle knock echoes through the room as you all turn to face it. Go and open it, Daniel hisses. Wha- No! You go open it, Lando whispers back. Bunch of babies, you murmur as you untangle yourself from your blanket. Swinging the door open, you freeze. Standing tall is Max with a paper bag at  hand.

“Hey.”

Peeking out into the hallway, you stare back confused. “Hey?”

Almost timidly, he kicks his feet up against the wall with a small smile. He extends his arm out, signaling for you to take the mysterious bag. I don’t want any problems, you choke out, feeling skeptical. His blue eyes grow wide.

“Oh. No, don’t worry!” He opens the bag and takes out a small container. Leaning forward, you feel blood rising up to your cheeks. “It’s just soup.”

After an awkward exchange, he leaves. Inhaling the delicious scent, you let out a dreamy sigh.

“He so likes her.”

-

“We might have been wrong.”

Lando tilts his head, curly strands bouncing at the motion. Daniel hurriedly takes a seat next to the Brit as he smacks his large hands on the table. “What do you mean, mate?”

Daniel scans the room quickly before shaking his head. “I mean, that I just heard them two. They were going at it.” Lando blushes as he lets out an awkward laugh. I don’t even want to know. The Australian bites back a smile as he continues. “Not like that. Yet. What I mean is that they’re back to square one. He’s being a complete dick.”

“Alright. Looks like we have to knock some sense into him.”

-

Go, Daniel mouths once Max enters the debrief room, eyes entertained on his phone screen. Pushing past the Dutch, Charles jogs over to where you sit next to George. “Hey!” Greeting him back with a warm smile, you pat to the open seat. “I was wondering if you wanted to grab a bite after this. Maybe some chicken soup?” You beam.

“I love a good soup!”

Rapidly, Max’s ears perk up as he hears your conversation with the Monegasque. He was well over the rivalry, but with this? He would not second guess bringing it back. He clenches his jaw as he notices you nodding along with Charles. Strolling over to the small group, he shoots a bitter grin.

“Did you see Christian’s message about our last minute meeting?”

“Hello to you, too.” Checking your phone, you look back confused with a pout. “No. I haven't received anything.”

“Yeah, well, there’s one-”

“No, there's not.” Flickering your eyes behind your teammate, you’re even more lost. With hands on his hips, Christian taps his shoe as his eyes flicker between his two Red Bull drivers. “Don’t mind him, sweetheart. There’s no meeting.” He sends a small wink at Charles before walking off to the rest of the team principles. Max slumps.

“Ha. Guess it got canceled or something like that…”

Rushing over Lando and Daniel, Charles hunches over as he starts blabbering. “Did it work? Please tell me it worked - God - I think I almost shit myself. Tell me it fucking wo-”

The Brit points discreetly to where Max paces the room, orbs trained on you like a guard dog.

“It’s definitely working.”

He smacks a one hundred dollar bill onto a large hand. 

“And thank you for the help, too, Mr. Horner.”

-

Despite the attempts to get you and Max together, nothing seemed to work. The blue eyed boy would appear to start registering his feelings, and at the last minute, would completely chicken out. It would be an outright lie to say that this didn’t entertain the Alpha Tauri and McLaren boys, but they also knew that they had to continue their fairy godparent duties.

“Watch it!”

Crashing onto the couch inside of the Red Bull Hospitality, Max’s face bounces against it. He groans in pain before throwing a harsh stare at his friends. Lando stiffles a giggle as Daniel raises his arms up in defense. Getting seated, the Dutch looks back with a sour expression. 

“What’s this hostile situation about?”

Lando panics as he turns to his mate. The Aussie licks his lips, patting his lap. “Look, we’ve noticed a few things-” What things? He huffs. “Maybe if you would just let me finish-” That’s what she said! He glares at Lando who slaps a hand over his mouth, tears from unreleased laughter painting his blue eyes. “As I was saying…We’ve noticed your behavior towards a special little someone…”

“Towards Heidi? Shit. I didn’t think it’d be that noticeable.”

Lando clicks his fingers rapidly before pointing at the Red Bull driver. “He’s trying to not talk about it because he knows where this is going!” No, I’m not, Max shrieks as his voice cracks. Blushing, he pushes his hat lower to his face.

“You like her!”

“You know I like Heidi! She’s good for you-”

“You know that’s not who we’re talking about.”

It’s silent for a while. Standing up, Daniel goes to sit next to the 26 year old. Running a hand over his face, Max’s sighs as he looks up. “I’m not…used to feeling this way, okay?” 

“That’s totally fine, but that doesn’t give you the right to treat her like a piece of gum stuck at the bottom of your shoe. She’s amazing. Could have anyone - and I mean anyone - but she likes you. I don’t know why or how, but she likes you.” Daniel scoots away when Max narrows his eyes.

“She doesn’t like me.”

Jumping over the coffee table, Lando plops down. “Yes! She does. Ask me how I know.” A bored expression slashes Max’s face as he asks anyway. How, Lando? How do you know? “Because she’s always fighting with you.”

Daniel clicks his tongue as he slowly squints his brown eyes. “I don’t think you’re making the point you think you’re making, mate.” The Brit waves him off.

“I’m dead serious. When she gets upset, she always walks away because she claims to not want to waste her time on stupid arguments. But with you,” he pushes his index finger against the Red Bull polo, “With you she never - ever - walks away. Sure, you’re both at each others throats, but that only means one thing.” He leans against the sofa as he takes a sip of the open energy drink. 

“She doesn’t mind wasting time on you.”

-

After some more convincing, the duo had managed to raise the 26 year olds confidence. They could be wrong. Embarrassingly wrong, but how would he ever know if he never tried? Taking in a deep breath, he finds himself knocking on your door.

“More soup?”

Sheepishly, he shakes his head. His heart skips a beat as he notices how laid back you seem. How relaxed you were. He was going to ruin all that. He was going to say something that would change everything and things might never be the sa-

“Wanna come in?”

Handing him a plate of cut up watermelon, you take a seat in front of him, legs tucked beneath your butt. What are you doing out so late at night, Mr. Max Verstappen? He sets the plate down as he forces himself to mold into his chair. 

“I’ve never hated you.”

You blink. Clearing his throat, he looks down to his lap as he fiddles his fingers. “I know I’ve been such a bad teammate - I know - but I promise that it never had to do with you.”

“Okay. So…then what did it have to do with?”

He lets out a croaky laugh as he shuts his eyes. “That’s the tough part…” Opening his blue eyes, he finds you staring back, waiting for an answer. “I feel the opposite of hate…towards you.” He hates the way your face doesn’t change and you remain still. He hates when you shrink back and chew on your lip.

But he could never find himself hating the moment you climb onto his lap.

“T-that’s not what I came here for-”

“I know.” You slide your hands against his stubble. “Your confession was…adorable. Had trouble saying those words out loud, right? Because you,” you strum your finger against his chest, “...You don’t have feelings. You don’t have a heart.”

Now he’s frowning as he tries to unravel your words. A giggle bubbles up your throat, eyes crinkling shut. His breath hitches. “I feel things…” Your heart twirls with the way his voice sounds. Sure you do, Maxie- 

Grabbing your face with his left hand, he kisses you. It’s hot, feverish, and impatient.

It’s him.

Whimpering, you grind against him as he groans underneath you. Forcing himself to pull away from your warm lips, he cocks his head to the side. “Was that enough proof?”

“I might need more.”

It’s such a moment of pure adrenaline, that you can’t even pinpoint the moment your hatred towards him had turned into lust. All you know is that it felt so good to be riding him. Squeezing your hips, he lifts you up as he lets out a strained moan. The sound itself makes you drip even more. 

You had always loved his voice. How croaky it was. But you never imagined that it would turn your entire world upside down to hear him moaning your name like a prayer. Oh, fuck. Holy shit. Pushing his hands down, he opens his eyes as he looks back, weak and concerned. He worries you might have suddenly regretted all of this. That you would walk away and never want to talk to him ever again. But he’s already kissed you. He’s already been inside of you. 

He would beg you to stay in order to make you keep it that way.

“B-baby.” He whimpers with the way you dig yourself against him before circling your hips. Slow. “It’s okay if you want to stop-” You slide his fingers into your mouth. He swears he could finish with such a pretty sight.

“I don’t want to. I just want you to say sorry for everything you’ve ever done to me.”

“I already said I never meant any of it! You’re absolutely everything to me.”

Your core grows tighter with his affirmations. Holding onto his broad shoulders, you continue your sinister rhythm. “Maybe. But I still want one.”

“I’m so-”

Rubbing your bare tits against his chest, he shudders as he harshly pinches your thigh. Try again. “I said I’m so-” Pulling all the way out, you slide back down onto his cock. “Oh - don’t fucking do that.”

“Try again.”

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m so fucking sorry.”

A satisfied smile slides onto your plump lips as you nod before kissing him and riding him the way you know he deserves. With one last hop, you both finish as he moans into your neck. Your fingers push his sweaty, blondish strands away before pressing your lips against his cheek. He smiles weakly.

“I like you, too.” You look down before returning your attention. “But I can’t be with you.”

“Wh-”

“Max. Let’s be realistic here. I’m a girl in Formula 1. You don’t know how hard I’ve worked to get here. I’ve had to do twice the work simply because I’m not a man.” You roll your eyes. “People are going to hate me. Call me names - God, I can already hear them.”

He never thought his heart could actually hurt for someone. You were really messing him up. He gingerly rubs small circles against your cheek.

“I’ll ruin whoever says anything bad about you, but please give this a chance. I’ve never wanted someone as bad as I do you. Please.”

And yes, there will be nasty comments. Hateful interpretations about your relationship. But that never really mattered as long as you had him. 

[zzencat]

A Peek Into Your Future Person’s Midnight Thoughts (NSFW) - Timeless ⏳

From left to right. It’s the one you can’t take your eyes off of.

Batman wouldn’t get this info out of ‘em. What are they thinking about when they text you good night? These are the fantasies they’re too shy to share. No spiritual identities were revealed. (Minors DNI)

Note: This does not necessarily have to align with your kinks. This is what your future person wishes they could do to you.

Must do before you choose: Clear your mind. Time is now patient and still. Close your eyes, inhale deeply, fill your chest up to the fullest, feel the soft air brush up against the ridges of your nose. Breathe out. You may now begin.

——————————-

Pile 1. ‘Yeah? Say that again. I dare you.’

straight up strength kink. trapping you between their arms (thank you kim mingyu for the inspo and energy)

you could share a (huge) height difference with this person and it makes them want to protect you

they either have a muscular build or are very much taller than you. a lot of fs in this pile have both. especially working out the arms.

they like to see you feisty so that they have a reason to conquer yo ass

HEAVILY thinks about pushing you against a wall (a beige-colored wall, in particular) in a hotel room and fucking you against it

the type of person to edge you so much that you start crying

this person may have given you hints or will you give signs of their kinks before, so you will get the idea that they have a brat taming kink

will purposefully try to piss you off to get you all hotheaded and feisty. they really want to test your limits so that you “try” and “teach them a lesson” or “intimidate them” with a finger to their chest and everything—like “just bc you’re bigger than me doesn’t mean you can keep pissing me off.” it’s laughable for them bc this is what they wanted. they’ll let this build up for a little more, keep trying to rile you up…UNTIL it explodes and they finally show you who’s really in charge. you may or may not of like this but you’ll be blushing like crazy lmfao

they tend to go for types that are too easy to overpower physically. it’s even cuter if you’re shorter than them and very obviously can’t take them down

fantasizes about holding you down/keeping you stationed while going down on you

this person might be hairy. think of a human to werewolf transformation. a good 50% of you will encounter someone completely clean shaven, sophisticated looking, keeps composure so damn well, but has reallllly freaky desires and fantasies. you wouldn’t be able to tell. the hints are subtle tho and will come up in their everyday actions towards you. (example: cleaning up after you or watching out for you, holding you close when a stranger approaches…i’ll add more in the points of interest 🤧)

holy shit…listen, if this is a sibling of someone you know, they’ll def fantasize abt fucking you with said sibling(s)/family members around, sneaking around the family house, doing it in risky places and times (have mercy!!!) — ex: cupping your mouth while they go down on you or tease you like “you don’t want them to find out, do you? keep quiet for me”

they’d love to hold your jaw in place and make you look at them while they pleasure you

wouldn’t feel ashamed or embarrassed for making you moan too loud. if youre at an event, they get off on people hearing you — doesn’t matter if your parents or the elderly hear it

this person really gets off on the idea of having sex in public. they’re a true exhibitionist :)

(expanding off my previous point) most of the fs in this pile don’t get…jealous?? like very “look but don’t touch” type of person when it comes to you; they know people don’t dare to compete with them. this person is very confident in where they stand in your life. if you ever suggest bringing in someone to watch you guys, they would be okay with the idea. now, a very small percentage are extremely possessive in this pile, but the idea is the same. i’m not ignoring them but only mentioning them slightly bc the small percentage want you to at least be aware that they’re capable of feeling extreme possessiveness (reminder: not the same as jealousy). as long as people know that you guys are together (and it’s been made obvious) and don’t try to cross the line or make passes at you, pile 1 fs is confident enough and typically doesn’t feel the need to prove more

^^ but i will say that some subtle signs of jealousy include trying to look superior to other “threats” to your relationship

stay with me now. they fantasize about you trying your best- whatever that means ?!?! bc of the height difference, if you get sassy with them or even get annoyed at them, all they do is just smirk and make it known that you’re just a doll to them (to keep it very vague w you).

honestly this person would be down to take you anywhere. for some reason, they always want people to know you guys are fucking so they think about doing it in public a lot. this person could work on just simply having nice slow sensual sex in the bedroom tho. i think it’s just cuz they crave the thrill and it’s a fat ego boost. but cmon…it’s nice to just have some chill loving sex once in a while (i’m nudging their spirit abt it)

you guys could be TOTAL opposites and have an enemy-to-lovers trope going on. OR extremely similar feisty, fiery personalities. some people here have a fwb or ewb kind of relationship w them already OR one of you has fantasized abt it

they could honestly give you a whole list of what they like and want to do to you but would rather show you (they’re pretty impatient). they need to know you’re wanting- no- craving the same thing- that you want them as much as they want you

points of interest: teasing to NO end (in bed and out); has a habit of calling you pet names (even when not in a relationship w you) or nicknames; tall; height difference; possible mbti: very VERY estp, entj, a tiny bit of estj vibes; your front or back against the wall; take you down - chris brown; backshots; hands behind head, “try it. i dare you”; “you’re not that strong” (idk who- either you or your person says this in hopes to rile the other up); tickle fights or play fighting that leads to…other things 😏; a friend’s sibling, unexpected or forbidden relationships; going down on you in a closet at a family vacation home (?!?! damn)

——————

Pile 2. ‘Treat me like your doll.’

you or this person could be a switch, but regardless, you will have many chances to take charge

the bondage is too obvious in this pile. they also may have body image issues

this person could be sub-leaning tbh. probably struggles making eye contact with you during the deed or just in general (w/ you or people)

wants to please you and be used by you

masochistic as hell

someone here struggles with very obvious self esteem issues, but through this relationship and learning how to trust and be vulnerable, you will both heal each other on a deeeeeply emotional level. you will make this person feel comfortable in what they fantasize about and this will be reciprocated

for some in this pile, like a good 45% of people, your fs may have dealt with sexual guilt growing up. (for a second, i felt like saying more but it’s safer for me to keep it vague for their sake.) this is reallll vague, so i’ll try to word it more carefully…the guilt can come from a plethora of things…

yk what would be beneficial for them? if you pleasured them while making them look in the mirror

this person is pretty shy with expressing their sexual desires. for many, this could be their first time, or just extremely inexperienced (but they feel embarrassed to admit that)

listen, the emotional sex will be insane. crying, lots of love—if you’re into dacryphilia, this will be your jam

trust is so important for them. also looking at each other’s eyes while going at it

deep long kisses that fade into sloppier, more desperate and needy ones (coming from more of their side)

idk how to explain this kink but it’s like…getting off to something you can’t have? they’d feel guilty about touching themselves to the thought of you (during the time you’re not yet dating each other) and that mental image would spiral into picturing you standing in front of them and just watching them get off to you while they’re on their knees. they see you as someone to be worshipped. they’ll be begging and possibly crying for you to let them cum

yk the deeper i dig into this, the more emotional it gets. i think this person is a huge people pleaser and has found it hard to be loved in this life time. but no worries, bc this relationship will help you both connect and become vulnerable. as long as you’re confident in yourself and carry a normal to high self esteem, you should be great in the relationship

mommy/daddy kink (it doesn’t mention who will be what but it’s def gonna be something they’ll be shy to confess), loves praise, collars (being collared), being your pet

this person would thank you for touching them. they could get pretty poetic in bed when edged for hours and under so much exposure

they def have the ability to be more dominant, but you’d really have to reel it out of them; they’re afraid of messing up

on the other hand, degradation will work wonders on them as long as you soothe those wounds later. praise and degradation will change this person’s life lmfao, as long as your timing is right

they’ll touch themselves thinking about soft and sensual, sensitive and teasing sexual acts, like mutual masturbation or if you use your hand to get them off while peppering their jaw with kisses

very sensitive person so their has to be a lot of trust between you to unlock the…freakier stuff (which is why i’ll cut it short. this is all they’re giving you for now 😎🤚)

points of interest: pinkie promises, very in tune with their feminine energy, “you’ll be here forever, right?”, very soft person with an insane sex drive, shy, doesn’t ask for much- just wants you to be there with them, quietly existing, kinda reminds me of those emo kids who date and kiss in the corner (but you guys will be engaging in no such cringe, esp not in public), shyly clings onto your hand, HOODIES hoodies hoodies, cool toned filters on pictures, matching clothes or accessories- i’m getting one person has a lock and the other with a key, collars with a heart on it, likes when someone gets possessive over them, will unintentionally spill their thoughts and ideas and then apologizes for rambling…i feel like a lot of you in this pile relate to them a lot…like very similar in personality or smth…lot of similarities (even subtle or suppressed parts of your personality), i really don’t think you’d be able to tell they’re a secret freak (maybe thru the way they dress but by personality, prob not), very artistic people- whatever art form they love or seek comfort from, you will find this very attractive and unique

- very small note: i realize that i don’t feel the need to correct the commas and make them semi-colons to show the list. i think it’s their energy being very forgiving and that they don’t care if you mess up (lowkey it’s bc they’re used to being hurt 😞). very unlikely to call out your mistakes. they just want you to be there with them, to love them of their flaws. they will undoubtedly do the same. they just don’t want you to leave them.

———————

Pile 3. If you look at them, you’ll laugh.

ok right of the bat, you guys are unarguably the most “nontoxic”, healthy, but also vanilla relationship out of the piles 😂😂

this person doesn’t have too many crazy ideas or thoughts when they think about sex tbh. they also don’t watch porn or at least are not addicted to it. very vanilla person with a normal sex drive

they prob get off like once or twice a day but sex to them is a bonding activity with you filled with laughter and some jokes (which both of you could work on if you want to ever engage in more kinky and dark stuff, esp since it could be hard for you to get serious and in the mood)

^^ like if you’re being handcuffed and you’re ticklish, this person will tickle you (unless you like this being done, it could mess with the sensual moment a bit 😅)

very gentle person. thinks about caressing your body

very affectionate and wants to tend to your needs. the last thing they want to do is have you in tears after sex (unless it’s happy tears)

they’re mostly serious with sex when they’re touching themselves alone (if you’re not physically there)

if you’re doing long distance, they’ll wait to have sex w you rather than touch themselves

don’t get me wrong yk they’re down to doing the freaky stuff too- but i think you guys are so in the “best friends” laughing with each other all the time, it could get unserious real quick 😂😂 if you’re okay with that, things should be ok for you 👍

open to engaging in all sorts of kinks and sexual fun, but they prefer it to be with you and not with another person involved. not that theyre judgmental of it, they just don’t want to have sex with others watch you guys or having another person/people involved. they prefer it to just be the 2 of you

so much laughing, too many good vibes, they’re completely enamored by you

you could share a similar personality to each other, but weirdly, without disrupting the balance

just touching your skin and cuddling for hours = sex for them

points of interest: EXTREMELY LOYAL; can’t see anyone in this world but you; loves what you think are your flaws; massaging your feet; caressing your body fat; will go wherever you want to go and they’d plan the trip too if you’d like; very kind person—so nice that they could try to help everyone- they don’t look at these as bad things at all; animal person; they’re as warm as they look; it would take a long time to piss this person off bc they’re that understanding; they could come off as too positive and naive tho, if you’re like “don’t you see that person was trying to scam you?” and they’d shrug, pull you close with a grin and be like “it’s okay. they probably needed that money. i don’t mind 🙂‍↔️”, very precious soul, not into polygamous relationships

—————-

Teddy Note: Sorry guys I forgot my little ending speech so I’m going back to add it here- THANK YOU for taking the time to read this. I hope your day is going smoothly and if not, no worries, we got tomorrow. Take what resonates and leave what doesn’t. I love that saying when any reader says it. Energy can seriously follow you if you dwell on it too much, while thinking about it negatively. Again, thanks for joining me on my readings if you’re new here :)

Have a good one guys. Teddy out 😎👍👍

[obsesssedblerd]

Shut me up

“No, no, please, you don’t understand—we need to have a room with two beds instead of one.” 

From the middle of the bed, Satoru scoffs at the sound of your desperate pleas to the receptionist over the phone. You pace back and forth, groaning when you’re told that it was the last room. “I know that we booked last minute, but— Oh…. this is the only room available? …I see. Goodnight.” 

When you hang up, Satoru doesn’t stop his laugh, and the sound of it immensely amplifies your frustration. “You’re so pissed off,” he says as you cross your arms and glare at him. “It’s hilarious. Well, princess, looks like we’re here for the night. Get comfortable.” 

“Hell no,” you say, reaching into your bag to grab your phone. “I’m gonna ask Yaga for another place. There has to be another inn that’s close to the curse we’re tracking, and has two beds.” 

Satoru gets up from the bed and walks over to you, gently plucking your phone out of your hands and placing it on the dresser. “Yaga is asleep right now, and he worked his ass off to get this place for us at the very last minute.”

Good point. “Fine, I’ll sleep on the floor.” 

“Quit being ridiculous.” The asshole smirks, his blue eyes sparkling mischievously. “So flustered at the idea of sharing a bed with me. We’re just sleeping. You’re not thinking about anything dirty, are you?” 

“Huh?! No,” you hiss. “What the hell is wrong with you?” 

He doesn’t stop his teasing. “Hm. Sounds like you’re lying.” 

“Fuck you, Satoru,” you say, walking over to your bag and grabbing some clothes comfortable to sleep in. “And I’m not flustered. Just hate the idea of being so close to someone I can’t stand.” You head into the bathroom to shower and change before he can say anything else. “If you snore tonight, I’m kicking you.”

—

You can’t sleep. How could you? The room is quiet, and all you can think about is the man beside you. Speaking of, you hear Satoru shift, and the faint aroma of the expensive body wash he used while showering fills your nose. You hate to think it, but he does smell good. You look at the clock on the nightstand, and sigh quietly. Almost midnight. 

“Are you awake?” Satoru asks, and you pretend that you don’t hear him. 

You feel a poke in your ribs, and you shriek. “What the hell?!” 

“Pfft. Knew you were up.” He chuckles. “Ticklish?” 

“Do you need something?” 

“Nah, I just wanted to bother you.” 

You inhale sharply in an attempt to calm yourself, then turn around to face him. Though the room was mostly dark, you can still see him due to the moonlight shining through the window of the room. He’s lying on his side with his head resting against his arm, which was propped up on his pillow. 

“You’re like a child,” you say flatly as you roll your eyes. 

The corner of his mouth lifts in amusement. “Mhm.” 

“And you talk too much.”

“Tell me more.” 

“Extremely annoying, I can’t stand when you show up to missions late sometimes because you want sugar, and you joke around way too much when we’re supposed to be serious. Yaga, Suguru, and Shoko think that, too.”

He chuckles again, and you ignore the way your stomach flutters at the sound of it. “Aw, come on. You tell me that almost everyday. Give me something new.” 

“And give you that satisfaction? Nope,” you say, popping the ‘p’ as you turn back around to face the wall. “I think you’re the most ridiculous person I’ve ever worked with,” you conclude. 

“Well, you know what I think?” He asks, and you hum in question. You hear the bed creak as he moves, and your heart begins to pound when you sense him directly behind you. If you were to shift back even just a tiny bit, your back would be against his chest. 

“I think you’re full of shit,” he says near your ear, his voice dropping an octave lower. You feel his hand gently rest on your shoulder. 

“How so?” You whisper.

His hand begins to slowly slide down your arm, goosebumps rising on your skin. “You think I’m the most ridiculous person you’ve ever worked with, but you keep working with me,” he purrs, his breath fanning the shell of your ear. “At any moment, you can tell Yaga to quit having us do missions together, but you don’t. I always end up seeing you even though you say you hate looking at me.”

You feel his hand softly drift across your hip, then rest there, his fingers lightly playing with the hem of your shirt. Then, they slip underneath, drawing light, teasing patterns on your skin. Your breath hitches. 

You feel warm. 

“Saw how you looked at me when I got out of the shower earlier,” he says, and your stomach twists. Of course he did. Nothing ever gets past Satoru Gojo. “You were practically drooling while watching me put a shirt on.” 

“I-” You clear your throat. “I wasn’t.”

“You’re such a liar.” 

His lips press a feather-light kiss to your neck—on a spot where you’re very sensitive, and you gasp, but instinctively tilt your head to give him a bit more access. When you catch yourself, you straighten, and Satoru only scoffs. “See? It’s obvious.” 

“...What’s obvious?” 

“You want me.” 

You turn around again, ready to tell him that this was the dumbest thing you’ve heard him say all night, but he puts a finger to your lips, effectively stopping your words before you can get them out. “You want me,” he says again, “but you don’t know how to deal with that. So, you pretend that you hate me when you and I both know that it’s not true.” He then smiles again, his eyes dark with want. “But I see right through it. You’re not subtle. Anyway, you have a choice. You can either continue with your lying, or you can actually do something about it.” 

It takes a lot out of you to keep your hands out of the way so you don’t strangle him and then pull him closer. “Something like what?” You ask.

“You think I talk too much.” He leans closer to you; your faces nearly touching. You swallow once, his eyes tracking the movement of your throat as you do. Then his smile grows, inviting—no, daring you to make a move. 

“So shut me up.”