#I’m not going to apologize for being queer and taking up space in non-queer places

[girl4music]

I really don’t ask for too much. I don’t think it’s asking too much to have a self-inserted version of me in TV art/entertainment that not only lives, but has a decent endgame. Maybe not necessarily a happy ending but at least some kind of ENDING that doesn’t include death for either me as my self-insert character or the character of which I love. It’s not asking too much.

It’s not asking too much to be allowed to exist and have a main narrative that’s properly concluded.

It’s not.

[taekooktimeline]

April 24, 2023

April 24, 2023 - Tae and Jk attend a personal event for the movie premier of “Dream,” featuring one of Tae’s good friends, Wooga member Park Seo-Joon (also featuring IU). It’s Jk’s first movie premier event and he had this moment with Tae. And it’s also good to note they went as individuals Taehyung and Jungkook, not as BTS members, nor did they attend in any type of work context.

There is SO much to unpack so I’ll start off with my opinion, especially because I’m so emotional and overwhelmed (in the best ways) by what this means. This was 1000% a statement. Nothing is a coincidence with Taekook. In my opinion, this event explicitly states the obviousness of their relationship, without implicitly saying it in words. Some of the below was mentioned on my IG / Tumblr already but I can’t stress how pivotal this event was, so I won’t apologize for being repetitive.

Let’s start with their clothes, covered in more extensive detail below. Their attire alone is a statement, very queer coded - Tae’s jacket brand, his shirt, Jk’s quotes on his jacket. They didn’t wear their brand ambassador clothing, when this would’ve been a good opportunity to do that. They knew this event would be significant and they planned their outfits with meticulous thought to help convey their message of intent. Them choosing to wear queer coded clothes at their first non-work related premier together is not a coincidence in any way. It’s quite a statement and noteworthy in itself.

And it wasn’t just their clothing choices that were meaningful. Their body language and expressions were significant too. 

They’re familiar with red carpets and big events in their line of work (Jungkook recently performed solo for the World Cup 2022), and yes, Jk is more of an introvert, but he still was extra shy during this premier. And that’s because this was a statement. Both knew this moment was special, and IMO, Jk’s shyness was a result of this knowledge.

They didn’t walk with any other Wooga member, nor did any other BTS member attend. They walked together, just the two of them, knowing what this would signify about them and their relationship. They knew it would be impactful, the next step to normalizing their relationship to the public. This was about them. This was them showing us who they are to each other, how special their bond is. Not only that, this event shows how safe and secure they feel in their relationship, to want to take such a monumental, public step like this.

I’ll go over it in more detail below, but I also find it to be so sweet and telling that these two make sure to be each other’s pillar of strength when the other needs it. Tae made sure to be Jk’s safe space, as he always has been and always will be. When Jk hesitated to walk to the photo wall, he took his wrist. The way Jk looked at Tae when he turned back to take his wrist? He lit up when Tae turned and that speaks VOLUMES, and it shows his trust to Tae. Then they stepped out to the photo wall TOGETHER, as a duo, not individually. 

They prioritize and choose each other and they always will. No matter what any “fan” says on SM. No matter what nonsense lies or fantasy some random person on the Internet spouts. Their relationship will continue as it is, and they’ll keep getting louder, because this is reality. And they’ve shown as much at this event. 

It’s massive and beautiful and significant what took place. For me, as of now this was their biggest moment - bigger than Harry Styles, Atomix, Paradise Hotel, etc. And I couldn’t be prouder. They’re so brave. It honestly leaves me in awe seeing such an incredible display of courage, knowing the media and all these eyes - in person and online - were watching. They’ll change the world. I feel so strongly about that. And I will always support them.

Getting into the premier itself! This is Jk’s first movie premier, and Tae’s fifth. The other four movie events Tae attended are as follows:

11/26/2016 “Derailed” (Minho)

08/07/2017 “Midnight Runners” (Park Seojoon)

07/30/2019 “The Divine Fury” (Park Seojoon and Choi Wooshik)

06 /02/2022 “Broker” (Kang Dong Won)

https://twitter.com/doc_taetae/status/1650889516771852290?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

Again, because this is important to remember - this is Taekook’s first movie premier event together, on their own, in an unofficial, not work related setting. And this is the first time Tae has brought a +1 to a friend’s movie premier!

Jk kept smiling as they walked closer to the photo wall -

https://twitter.com/oknaisyode/status/1650498974338654208?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

His smile -> he’s practically glowing as he acknowledges this fan 🥹

https://twitter.com/imgoldencard/status/1651758747642130432?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

Walking closer to the photo wall - 

Tae looking so happy in these stills as he sees fans - (😭)

https://twitter.com/taeguide/status/1650473934872092672?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/dailyforjk/status/1650470591009370112?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

The sequence of these two photos 🥰

As they make their way closer to the crowd, Jk smiles - 

He then glances at Tae with a softer smile (his expression 😭) -

His smile widens again as he looks away -

https://twitter.com/evexece_kthjjk/status/1650575338580107267?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

I saw some have interpreted the next moment as the guards stopping Jk from walking to the wall with Tae. That’s not how I interpret this moment as the reason for Jk stopping. We see the guards stopping them both, but it looks like only Jk heard, and Tae initially didn’t hear.

View angle here - https://twitter.com/wintertaeta/status/1651226619556638721?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

One guard places a hand on Jk’s back for a moment -

And you can see another guard stopping them both from walking, before motioning for them to step forward -

The other guard briefly places his hand briefly on Jk’s back a second time (encouragement to head out to the photo wall) -

https://twitter.com/wintertaeta/status/1651226619556638721?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

The way I interpret this moment is - Jk was very adorably shy throughout this event. This was an important moment for them and they both knew that. Jk stops walking (because the guards instructed them both to). However, when Tae turned around, the indescribable emotions in Jk’s eyes as he looks at Tae is absolutely everything. I can’t stress enough how important, how special, how monumental this night was. “Their moment of truth.” And after this sweet exchanged look, the MC yells out, “BTS!” and they step out in front of fans, reporters - a crowd - together.

https://twitter.com/mariposa732/status/1650538846335954944?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

Tae was very much encouraging, Jk’s safe space, his source of strength. He turned and gave assurances, giving him a small nod -

before confidently holding Jk’s wrist for a moment, unbothered by the people and cameras surrounding them. And, in turn, Jk trusted him and that speaks volumes too.

Front view of Tae holding Jk’s wrist -

Note Jk’s sweet, soft smile and gaze after Tae held his wrist -

When Tae turns to walk to the wall and the waiting crowd, his face looks very determined. For me, his energy throughout the event radiated that he was very mindful and protective of Jk. “I’ll take care of everything.”

Jk has a small smile on his face before they walk out together. It’s hard to see in a still so it’s encouraged to view the clip below. As OP mentions in the tweet, it seems as if he’s simultaneously anxious but excited (we can only speculate based on demeanor). This is a personal opinion, which you’re welcome to disagree with, but honestly this moment read to me like, “We’re really doing this,” accompanied by all the excited nervousness and butterflies of such an important moment. And then, they stepped out as a duo.

https://twitter.com/evexece_kthjjk/status/1650861346777600000?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg I’m going to leave a lot of links since this moment in itself was incredibly special - https://twitter.com/kookvtwins/status/1650468584693301248?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/_onlytkv/status/1650468023952875523?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/_k91230v_/status/1650475125266059264?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/regalkv/status/1650519708079362053?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/prashan57668544/status/1650672175966482432?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/regalkv/status/1650534829430280193?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/kazunessa/status/1650655293519585281?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/peachesminty/status/1651359920036671488?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

I found this so sweet. Tae turns back to check on Jk as they walk to the green wall - 

https://twitter.com/taekoomania/status/1663830729430814720?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://www.instagram.com/p/Cs5o1yHtPCg/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

Another adorable angle of shy Jungkookie🥰 - 

On the red carpet, Tae looks at Jk out of his peripheral vision -

Tae then nudges a bashful Jk -

who looks back at him shyly, asks “What?” and smiles. His expression to Tae is so endearing!

https://twitter.com/thetkglobal/status/1650467506740682753?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

While Tae gazes fondly, Jk closes his eyes and smiles widely.

Jk proceeds to cover his face in shyness.

Tae’s endeared smile towards Jk’s reaction -

Tae does an adorable copy / paste. 

https://twitter.com/dailyforjk/status/1650466844484968448?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

They proceed to pose for photos. 

https://twitter.com/briller__613/status/1650462451627065345?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

And they acknowledge people in the crowd - 

More posing and waves - 

Long clips (adding many in case one ever goes private or deactivates) - https://twitter.com/v_of_me/status/1650470523317657600?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/vantaemaybe/status/1650461397636222977?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/myu_kookv/status/1650461248604045313?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/prashan57668544/status/1650688583630753792?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg Threads - https://twitter.com/diortetae/status/1650471960017788930?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/yoongellic/status/1650469143223885824?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

Another way Tae encouraged Jk was by passing him the mic and letting him speak first, when the MC asked him directly, “V-ssi, any word of support for actor Park Seo-Joon?” Taekook exchange a glance after her question. Their reaction when they make eye contact is so sweet, full of shyness and adoration.

Both smile when they turn away from the other -

https://twitter.com/dailyforjk/status/1650495457506779137?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/bxt321/status/1650527557966790658?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

Tae then hands the mic to Jk to answer the question first. What’s interesting here is when Jk cheers on Seo-Joon, he doesn’t call him Seo-Joon-nim or Seo-Joon-ssi. And he doesn’t just call him Seo-Joon either. He gives him a nickname, adding an -ie to the end of his name and saying, “Seo-Joon-ie hyung, fighting.” Honorifics are important in Korea (and other Asian cultures, like Japan) so for Jk to use a casual nickname at a premier event indicates closeness. We’ve seen many instances of Jk spending time with Tae and his Wooga friends (Wooshik only following the two of them on IG (when Jk had IG) Hobi’s party, bowling, skiing and the musical, for example). This is another instance that shows his close friendship with Wooga. 

Small recap of Jk with Wooga on TW- https://twitter.com/kakostel/status/1633220597969743874?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/kakostel/status/1633220703917883393?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

Tae’s fond expression towards Jk, covered in a few different angles -

https://twitter.com/sorte613/status/1650538970256932864?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/sorte613/status/1650468439541284864?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg YT recap - https://youtu.be/EU0EAaX3dmA

Taekook head back to the lounge area together.

You can see Tae glance back towards Jk in this last photo-

https://twitter.com/tcnckclnsmaek/status/1650513103832924160?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

Taekook exit the theater with Wooga -

https://twitter.com/chatshirelore/status/1650528431887773696?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

Stills of them exiting the theater -

Jk nods his head, smiles at OP and even briefly glances back -

https://twitter.com/taekoomania/status/1650553519508955136?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

Preserving these photos because they’re so beautiful -

https://twitter.com/sorte613/status/1650480135211208706?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

As they head to meet actor Kim Soohyun, Jungkook visibly takes a breath. As others have pointed out, we haven’t really ever seen Jungkook exhibit this type of nervous energy - before concerts, work related events, or when he performed solo for the World Cup 2022. This is another indicator of how nervous (but excited, happy and brave) these two were

https://twitter.com/vcutath/status/1657087078230896642?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/mytaekooook/status/1657262532162142209?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg Close up- https://twitter.com/peachesminty/status/1657270571649081344?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/taekoomania/status/1657289089408974848?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

Close up- 

Taekook also met Director Lee Byeongheon at the Dream VIP after party! (Remember, Tae mentioned he got drunk, as he briefly recounted in his live the next day- https://www.tumblr.com/emporium/716493153047363584/pg-hellsite-hecksite-patch-500 ) 

https://twitter.com/mybwits/status/1657250390004625408?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

Taekook made a lot of statements at this premier, and I especially want to draw detailed attention to their clothing, as this wasn’t a coincidence. They’re both brand ambassadors - Tae for Celine, and Jk for Calvin Klein, but they, instead, chose LGBTQIA+ coded outfits to wear to a movie premier they attended together, knowing what the connotations of this would mean. 

Jungkook’s jacket (designer Enfants Riches Deprimes) is incredibly queer coded.

The front right pocket is covered in Biblical scripture. “For all sinned, and come short of the glory of God ~All we like sheep have gone astray ~Sirs, what must I do to be saved?”

Detailed thread written by a good friend - https://twitter.com/heaven_borahae/status/1650493166938886144?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

According to another good friend, Jungkook’s Biblical scripture is about two men, Paul and Silas, that were jailed for their practices and for “causing a public nuisance” - one of the men being someone that many believe was gay.

More info here - https://twitter.com/koosyoyo/status/1650503243670208514?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/koosyoyo/status/1650500286052544513?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

Jk’s left sleeve is an excerpt from “Anonymous Diary of a New York Youth, Vol. 3” which was written by columnist Taylor Mead, who wrote the first gay newspaper in NYC called “Gay Power.” He was also friends with Andy Warhol, a celebrated, famous gay artist, known for the Pop Art Movement. Andy was impressed by his writing and film roles by the time they met, and Andy would end up filming Taylor in “Tarzan and Jane Regained…Sort Of” “Imitation of Christ” and “Taylor Mead’s Ass”. 

https://twitter.com/_gcfofvante/status/1650529119363559425?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

Tae’s jacket is by Juntae Kim, a brand famous for creating gender fluid clothing.

https://twitter.com/taeguide/status/1650526602445332484?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/taeguide/status/1650476212039430144?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

His shirt is a “rare find” on Etsy - an Oscar Wilde and Morrisey print.

More info on Tae’s shirt:

Oscar Wilde paved the way for gay rights. He was intimately involved with Alfred Douglas, convicted of sodomy and was imprisoned for two years for this. After his release, he spent his final three years in exile. At the time of his “offense,” homosexuality was a criminal offense and serious societal taboo in Britain. Oscar went back and forth between hiding and attempting to gain public acceptance.

You can read more here - https://twitter.com/heaven_borahae/status/1650484860753186816?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg 

And here https://www.history.com/this-day-in-history/oscar-wilde-is-sent-to-prison-for-indecency 

Morrisey, the other component to Tae’s shirt, is pansexual, and coined the term “humasexual” to describe himself.

More info here - https://www.theatlantic.com/culture/archive/2013/10/morrissey-confirms-attraction-humans-probably-not-attracted-you/309767/

The reason I went into such depth and detail with their clothing is because their choice of attire for this premier is not a coincidence in any way. As a moot (TaeJkForever) beautifully wrote, their outfits allude to the stigmatization of homosexuality. They’re both very smart, and they knew exactly what they were doing by choosing these queer coded outfits for their first movie premier together. There was intent in that choice. They came to make a statement about their relationship, and they absolutely did, in so many different ways. 

Getting into the media coverage: as expected, Dispatch covered the duo. On their IG, they posted their photos first, before IU and Seo-Joon, who’s premier this movie was for. 

This was their IG story -

Their YT reel featured the hand holding emoji -

https://youtube.com/shorts/4Ye5wVNp4CA?feature=share

Remember - Dispatch used the same 👬emoji for Taekook in March 2018 -

Recap - https://www.tumblr.com/taekooktimeline2018/625075008238125056

A reporter’s observation -

Another article -

And another - 

The entertainment agency for “Dream” used Taekook’s signature 💜💚 in their coverage - 

Elle Singapore called them Taekook -

World music awards called them Taekook also -

As an aside, I love that Jk said “my mom made me pretty.” It’s obvious he enjoys calling himself pretty and being called pretty by others. This reporter complimenting him as such is really sweet. (Also note the worldwide trends that showed up on the news - their national debut!) -

https://twitter.com/tcnckclnsmaek/status/1651103138257174528?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://twitter.com/ilykv_/status/1651100156102860801?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg

[elodieunderglass]

Oh it’s even more than that! The cis straight guy is very often a ride home, dad or husband. Or a Bob which I will explain in this essay is a signifier of a healthy ecosystem, like frogs are.

This is a 3 am take so consider this a blanket apology and a readmore but if you hate this post you were warned.

If he’s someone’s ride home, then his presence enables queer people to show up. Note this importance in, say, rural America or where the person might use a wheelchair or need care or can’t drive. Or where the meeting place is generally awkward.

If he’s someone’s dad, his presence enables kids to show up. I know a 5 year old trans kid in real life. I know a nonbinary teen in real life who’s allowed to do a lot on their own, but their parents worry, and if they’re hanging out with adults the parents want to attend and meet the adults. Teenagers are so liminal with this.

If he’s someone’s husband, that’s a perfectly common accessory for a bisexual, nonbinary, or trans person. I think it adds a delightful dimension to queer spaces. I think it’s great that there’s a whole class of sexuality that’s “bi wife energy” or “straight except for loving this person” or “straight since I think nonbinary people are considered a different gender to my own - actually I’m completely lost about whether that’s true but we’ve been married ten years?” or “straight except for the fact that my partner transitioned, and we’re still married, and it’s none of your business.” At this point they’re so common that they’re their own subspecies. I think all spaces should have a slightly bewildered guy in his late forties who owns a set of good screwdrivers. I am bi and have one myself; it is a common pairing. “Why would your husband come to your social thing” idk this is a genuine thing people do sometimes in non-tar-pit spaces. They stop by. It’s almost like birds. You meet this incredible ornate, splendid older queer person and then they introduce their husband Professor Robert “Bob” Kevinsworth, who’s just this extremely straight old big fat Linux geologist in a 90s t-shirt with a trout on it, they’ve been married 45 years. Evolutionary pressures mean that the Bob must be relatively drab in order to camouflage themselves on the nest or something; if you want to attract the flashy half of the couple to your garden, then you have to provide habitat for Bob. idk it’s 3:46 am right now. But it’s like frogs; the presence of Bobs indicates a healthy and established ecosystem, like Grison and Derin indicate. Because frogs, who absorb environmental toxins readily through their skin, are an indicator species for pollution and biodiversity; a Bob means there is going to be less toxicity and more diversity.

[And also it’s none of our business but there are an awful lot of queer Bobs (Bob himself, again, possibly being queer) and it’s really none of our business. Sure, maybe that person looks like a straight grandpa. A lot of people do/did. I have always hated the idea that you can “spot” a queer person by their haircut, clothes or youth (largely because I don’t look very unusual or amazing myself.) the oldest nb person I know is a sort of Bob with a big white beard and grandchildren, and I’m sorry but at their age they are NOT going to be getting a different haircut! Let alone pink Shein dungarees and black circle sunglasses to signify their queerness to gatekeepers. A lot of people seeing them would assume they are cishet. Nope! Just old, fat and unfashionable.)

So a space that doesn’t have room for a cishet guy is a space that has made decisions about children, non-drivers, a large proportion of bi and nonbinary people, straight trans women, dads, and so on.

Which is fine in itself I suppose, but what they’re clearly kinda selecting for is a population of able twentysomethings who can all have sex with each other. and the thing is that there’s often a vibe they feel annoyed by seeing people they don’t want to fuck (children, middle-aged people, unfashionable queer people, people unironically wearing trout t shirts).

So in my admittedly highly limited personal experience, the exclusionary “queer spaces” just tend to be an elaborate drama-production exercise for twentysomethings to date each other, the rituals are intricate etc.

And all the rest of the weird queer people are just. at the seed swap.

I'm kind of at a point where the "queer spaces" i feel safest in are the ones that have a pet cishet dude or two hanging around

[pumpkinpaix]

mdzs fandom, diaspora, and cultural exchange

Hey everyone. This post contains a statement that’s been posted to my twitter, but was a collaborative effort between several diaspora fans over the last few weeks. Some of the specifics are part of a twitter-localized discourse, but the general sentiments and issues raised are applicable across the board, including here on tumblr.

If you’ve been following me for a while, you’ve probably seen a few of my posts about this fandom, cultural exchange, and diasporic identity. For example, here, here, and here. This statement more directly criticizes some of the general issues I and others have raised in the past, and also hopefully provides a little more insight into where those issues come from. I would be happy if people took the time to read and reblog this, as the thought that went into it is not trivial, and neither is the subject matter. Thank you.

Introduction

Hello. I'm a member of a Chinese diaspora discord server - I volunteered to try and compile a thread of some thoughts regarding our place and roles in the fandom expressed in some of our recent discussions. This was primarily drafted by me and reviewed/edited by others with the hopes that we can share a cohesive statement on our honest feelings instead of repeatedly sharing multiple, fragmented versions of similar threads in isolation.

This was compiled by one group of diaspora and cannot be taken to represent diaspora as a whole, but we hope that our input can be considered with compassion and understanding of such.

For context, we are referencing two connected instances: the conflict described in these two threads (here and here), and when @/jelenedra tweeted about giving Jewish practices to the Lans. Regarding the latter, we felt that it tread into the territory of cultural erasure, and that it came from a person who had already disrespected diaspora’s work and input.

Context

The Lans have their own religious and cultural practices, rooted both in the cultural history of China and the genre of xianxia. Superimposing a different religious practice onto the Lans amidst other researched, canonical or culturally accurate details felt as if something important of ours was being overwritten for another’s personal satisfaction. Because canon is so intrinsically tied to real cultural, historical, and religious practices, replacing those practices in a canon setting fic feels like erasure. While MDZS is a fantasy novel, the religious practices contained therein are not. This was uncomfortable for many of us, and we wanted to point it out and have it resolved amicably. We were hoping for a discussion or exchange as there are many parallels and points of relation between Chinese and Jewish cultures, but that did not turn out quite as expected.

What happened next felt like a long game of outrage telephone that resulted in a confusion of issues that deflected responsibility, distracted from the origin of the conflict, and swept our concern under the rug.

Specifically, we are concerned about how these two incidents are part of what we feel is a repeated, widespread pattern of the devaluing of Chinese fans’ work and concerns within this fandom. This recent round of discourse is just one of many instances where we have found ourselves in a position of feeling spoken over within a space that is nominally ours. Regardless of what the telephone game was actually about, the way it played out revealed something about how issues are prioritized.

Background

MDZS is one of the first and largest franchises of cmedia that has become popular and easily accessible outside of China. Moreover, it’s a piece of queer Chinese media that is easily accessible to those of us overseas. For many non-Chinese fans, this is the first piece of cmedia they have connected with, and it’s serving as their introduction to a culture previously opaque to them. What perhaps is less obvious is that for many Chinese diaspora fans, this is also the first piece of cmedia THEY have connected with, found community with, seen themselves in.

Many, many of us have a fraught relationship with our heritage, our language—we often suffer from a sense of alienation, both from our families and from our surrounding peers. For our families, our command of the language and culture is often considered superficial, clunky, childish. Often, connecting with our culture is framed as a mandatory academic duty, and such an approach often fosters resentment towards our own heritage. For our non-Chinese peers, our culture is seen as exotic and strange and other, something shiny and interesting to observe, while we, trapped in the middle, find ourselves uprooted and adrift.

MDZS holds an incredibly important place in many diaspora’s hearts. Speaking for myself, this is literally the first time in my life I have felt motivated and excited about my own native tongue. It's the first time I have felt genuine hope that I might one day be able to speak and read it without fear and self-doubt. It is also the first time that so many people have expressed interest in learning from me, in hearing my thoughts and opinions about my culture.

This past year and a half in fandom has been an incredible experience. I know that I am not alone in this. So many diaspora I have spoken to just in the last week have expressed similar sentiments about the place MDZS holds in their lives. It is a precious thing to us, both because we love the story itself, and because it represents a lifeline to a heritage that’s never felt fully ours to grasp.

It’s wonderful to feel like we are able to welcome our friends into our home and show them all these things that have been so formative to our identities, and to be received with such enthusiasm and interest. Introducing this to non-Chinese friends and fans has also been an opportunity to bridge gaps and be humanized in a way that has been especially important in a year where yellow peril fear mongering has been at an all-time high.  

History

However, MDZS’ rise in popularity among non-Chinese audiences has also come with certain difficulties. It is natural to want to take a story you love and make it your own: that’s what transformative fandom is all about. It is also natural that misunderstandings and unintentional missteps might happen when you aren’t familiar with the ins and outs of the culture and political history of the story in question. This is understandable and forgivable—perfection is impossible, even for ourselves.

We hope for consideration and respect when we give our knowledge freely and when we raise the issue of our own discomfort with certain statements or actions regarding our culture. Please remember that what is an isolated incident to you might be a pattern of growing microaggressions to us. In non-Asian spaces, Asian diaspora are often lumped together under one umbrella. In the west, a lot of Chinese diaspora attach themselves to Korean and Japanese media in order to feel some semblance of connection to a media which approximates our cultures because there are cultural similarities. This is the first time we've collectively found community around something that is actually ours, so the specificities matter.

There is a bitterness about being Asian diaspora and a misery in having to put up a united front about racial issues. Enmity towards one group becomes a danger to all of us, all while our own conflicted histories with one another continue to pass trauma down through the generations. Many of us don’t even watch anime in front of our grandparents because of that lingering cultural antipathy. When the distinctions between our cultures are muddled, it feels once again like that very fraught history is flattened and forgotten.

Without the lived experience of it, it’s hard to understand how pervasive the contradictory web of anti-Asian and, more specifically, anti-Chinese racial aggressions are and how insidious its effects are. The conflation of China the political entity (as perceived and presented by the US and Europe) with its people, culture, and diaspora results in an exhausting litany of criticism levied like a bludgeon, often by people who don’t understand the complicated nature of a situation against those of us who do.

There is often a frankly stunning lack of self-awareness re: cultural biases and blind spots when it comes to discussions of MDZS, particularly moral ones. There are countless righteous claims and hot takes on certain aspects of the story, its author, and the characters that are so clearly rooted in a Euroamerican political and moral framework that does not reflect Chinese cultural realities and experiences. Some of these takes have become so widespread they are essentially accepted as fanon.

This is a pattern of behavior within the fandom. It is not limited to any specific group, nor does it even exclude ourselves—we are, after all, not a monolith, and we should not be placed on pedestals to have our differing opinions weaponized against one another in fandom squabbles. We are not flawless in our own understandings and approaches, and we would appreciate it if others would remember this before using any of us as ultimate authorities to settle a personal score.

It is difficult not to be disheartened when enthusiastic interest crosses the line into entitled demand and when transformative work crosses into erasure, especially when the reactions to our raised concerns have so frequently been dismissive and hostile. The overwhelming cultural and emotional labor we bring to the table is often taken advantage of and then criticized in bad faith. We are bombarded with racist aggressions, micro and macro, and then met with ridicule and annoyance when we push back. Worse, we sometimes face accusations of hostility that force us to apologize, back down, and let the matter go.

When we bring up our issues, it usually seems to come with the expectation that there are other issues that should be addressed before we can address ours. It feels like it’s never really the time to talk about Asian issues.

On the internet and in fandom spaces, Western-coded media, politics and perspectives are assumed to be general knowledge and experience that everyone knows and has. It feels like a double standard that we are expected to know the ins and outs of western politics and to engage on these terms, but most non-Chinese have not even the slightest grasp of the sort of politics that are at play within our communities. We end up feeling used for our specialized knowledge and cultural background and then dismissed when our opinions and problems are inconvenient.

As the culture represented in MDZS is not a culture that most non-Chinese fans are familiar with, we’d like to remind you that you do not get to decide which parts of it are or are not important. While sharing this space with Chinese diaspora who have a close connection to the work and the painful history that goes along with being diaspora, we ask that you be mindful of listening to our concerns.

Cultural erasure is tied to a lot of intense historical and generational trauma for us that maybe isn't immediately evident: the horrors of the Pacific theatre, the far-reaching consequences of colonization, racial tensions both among ourselves and with non-Chinese etc. These are not minor or simple things, and when we talk about our issues within fandom, this is often what underlies them. This is one of the first and only places many of us have been able to find community to discuss our unique issues without feeling as if we’re speaking out of turn.

With the HK protests, COVID, the anti-Chinese platforms of the US election etc., anti-Chinese sentiment has been at the forefront of the global news cycle for some time now, and it is with complete sincerity that we emphasize once again how important MDZS fandom has been as a haven for humanizing and valuing Chinese people through cultural exchange.

Experiencing racial aggression within that space stings, not just because it’s a space we love, but because it feels like we’ve been swimming in rapidly rising racial aggression for over a year at this point.

Feelings

This is a difficult topic to broach at the best of times, and these are not the best of times. Many of us have a wariness of rocking the boat instilled in us from our upbringings, and it is not uncommon for us to feel like we should be grateful that people want to engage with something of ours at all. When we do decide to speak up, we’ve learned that there is a not insignificant chance that we’ll be turned on and trampled over because what we’ve said is inconvenient or uncomfortable. When it is already so difficult to speak up, we end up second-guessing and gaslighting ourselves into wondering whether there really was a problem at all.

We’d like to be able to share what we know about our culture and have our knowledge and experience be taken seriously and treated with courtesy. This is a beautiful, rich world built with the history of our ancestors, one that we too are trying to connect with. When we find it in ourselves to speak up about it, we would appreciate being met with consideration instead of hostility.

We don't have the luxury of stepping away from our culture when we get tired of it. We don't get to put it down and walk away when it’s difficult. But if you're not Chinese or Chinese diaspora, you get to put this book down—we'd like to kindly request that you put it down gently because of how much it matters to all of us in this fandom, regardless of heritage.

What we are asking for is reflection and thoughtfulness as we continue to engage with this work and with one another, especially with regards to how Chinese issues are positioned. When we raise issues of our own discomfort, please take a moment to reflect before reacting defensively or trying to shut us down for spoiling the fun—don’t deprioritize our concerns, especially in a fandom for a piece of Chinese media. We promise most of us are not trying to start shit for the sake of a fight. Most of the time, all we want is acknowledgement and a genuine attempt at understanding.

Our hope with this statement is to encourage more openness and understanding between diaspora and non-Chinese fans while we navigate this place that we’re sharing. Please remember that for many of us, MDZS is far more intense than a typical fandom experience. Remember that the knowledge we have and research we do is freely and happily given, and that it costs us both materially and emotionally. Please don’t take that for granted. Remember too that sometimes the reason for our discomfort may not be immediately evident to you: what seems culturally neutral and harmless might touch upon specific loaded issues for us. We ask for patience, and we ask for sincerity as we try to communicate with one another.

We are writing this because there’s a collective sense of imposed silence—that every time the newest round of discourse crops up, we often feel as if we’re walking away having created no meaningful change, and nursing new wounds that we’ll never get to address. But without speaking up about it, this is a cycle that will keep repeating.

This is not meant to shame or guilt the fandom into throwing themselves at our feet, either to thank us or beg for forgiveness—far from that. We’re just your friends and your fellow fans. We are happy to have you here, and we’re happy to create and share and play together. We just ask to be respected and heard.

Thank you. Thank you for listening. Several of us will be stepping back from twitter for a while. We’ll see you when we get back. ❤️

* A final addendum: here are two articles with solid practical advice on writing stories regarding a culture other than your own.

Cultural Appropriation for the Worried Writer: Some Practical Advice

Cultural Appropriation: Some More Practical Advice

The thread on twitter is linked in the source of this post. Thanks everyone.

[coldshrugs]

after the same rainbow's end

featuring: alma greene/mason; tina poname, soloman verda

word count: 1.2k

note: a @wayhavensummer entry for the 6/15 prompt flags! Tina ropes Alma and Verda into helping with a local Pride event; Alma and Mason discuss labels.

“So I’ve been thinking about Pride,” Tina bursts into the lab like a shot.

The echo of the metal door against the wall does little to shake her resolve, but it has all but assaulted her precious little scientists. With a smile of partial apology, she makes way for her designated stool (Verda insisted on giving her a specific place to sit while visiting the lab after a rogue elbow smushed one too many evidence samples).

“Hi Tina,” Alma and Verda chime in unison, shaking off the sudden fright enough to focus on their work again. The monotone chorus of their greeting never fails to make her giggle.

Once she’s perched, legs and arms safely crossed, she continues the thought that came to her only moments earlier. No idea is too big for Tina, and she likes to believe her ideas aren’t too big for Wayhaven either.

“As I was saying, Pride Month is almost upon us. Yeah, sure, we usually go into the city and attend their festival, but Wayhaven is growing, and we have plenty to celebrate locally!”

Verda, safety goggles still on, slides his gaze over to Alma. “She’s going to ask us to help plan a Pride festival, isn’t she?”

“That’s definitely what this is building to,” Alma replies.

“Wayhaven’s never done anything like this, and we’re changing that this year.” Tina hazards a stretch, extending her arms high above her head where there are surely no critical pieces of evidence to defile. “Ah, I do love it when a plan comes together. Thank you, brainiacs!”

“But,” Alma begins, her words nearly failing as Tina stands and heads to the door, “but we don’t have a plan! We didn’t do anything!”

Tina rests her hand on the door’s handle, turning to Alma with a smile she knows her friend won’t be able to resist. “Alma, babe, just find some queer artisans, maybe some sponsors. Verda, you and Eric work on a few local places for food vendors. I’ll worry about the entertainment.”

With a wink, she wishes them goodbye and good luck, and her stride isn’t slowed down one bit by the echo of Verda asking Alma what the fuck just happened.

Crouched between counters in the tiny kitchenette with a cropped white t-shirt in front of her and surrounded by paints, Alma's putting the finishing touches on her pride outfit when the front door opens and closes with a sharp, quick sound.

“Where the hell are you?” Mason, quiet and confused. She forgot he was coming over after his patrol.

“Kitchen!” She stands, trying not to slide on the sheet she put down to protect the linoleum. This is a rental after all.

In an instant, Mason’s leaning over the counter (comfortable; he looks so comfortable in her space now that it might as well be his home too), eyeing her mess with a rare streak of curiosity.

“Whatcha got there?”

It takes everything in her to resist mumbling "a smoothie."

“I’m, uh, painting a t-shirt for the Pride festival.” Alma holds it up as carefully as she can. “Putting the ‘bi’ in biology.”

‘Bi’ and ‘biology’ are painted pink, purple, and blue. Not a bad job if she’s being honest.

“Cute,” he smirks. “Don’t really get needing to label it though. You like what you like—simple.”

She places the shirt back down to dry and steps around to his side of the counter. A quick kiss to the corner of his lips, another proper kiss when he turns to meet her face.

“It can be simple, but it’s not for everyone. There’s more to it than just a label, at least for me.” She leads him to the couch by his hand. "You've never thought about it?"

She knows the answer before he gives it.

"I don't need to think about it. It's just something that," he pauses, face scrunched in search of the right word—it doesn't seem to find him, "is."

After arranging their limbs in the tried and true way, a position that doesn't grate on Mason but allows for maximum cuddling and includes interlocked fingers, Alma continues her reasoning in the gentle expository tone she takes with him so often.

“For me, there’s a lot of comfort in having a name for my attraction. There’s this sense of community when you meet someone that’s different in the same way you are. It’s like this instant relief. A sense of safety.”

Mason nods. Safety, relief–feelings to which he clings once he finds them–he gets that.

“You might be surprised what you’re comfortable with after a little research.” She tugs a blanket over both of them, then grabs the remote to turn the TV’s volume almost all the way down. “Ready for several hours of Ancient Aliens?”

“Alma, I cannot emphasize how much I hate this show.”

“And yet you still drag your ass over here every single week to rip it to shreds with me. It's called a hate-watch for a reason, sweetheart.”

Mason shifts under her legs, half-grin at odds with his almost imperceptible grunt of defeat.

Work and festival planning, festival planning and work. Alma hardly remembers the last decent conversation she had with someone that wasn’t Tina. Even after weeks of non-stop planning, the day of Wayhaven’s Pride falls upon her with all the giddiness of a child waiting for their birthday.

She paces by the window, waiting for her team. Unit Bravo insisted on picking her up and attending as a group. For work. For her safety. No one mentions how, conveniently, they're a group of queer friends and that in itself is worth celebrating.

"Always the no labels thing with these guys," she huffs to herself just as the dark SVU pulls into the parking lot.

In the time it takes Adam to park and Alma to move to the door, Mason is already there when she opens it. He leans against the frame, hands in the pockets of his jacket.

She takes it in stride. One gets used to turning around to a room presumed empty and finding a vampire or two after the umpteenth time.

“How does the shirt look?” She does a little spin and smiles at his only-slightly-distracted nod of approval.

“Nice work, space girl.”

“Thank you.” Alma stretches up for the customary hello kiss, hand tugging at his jacket collar to bring him down to her level, when her fingers run over the enamel pins.

Two new additions to the dark leather jacket stand out now that she’s closer to him. Pride flags: pansexual, demiromantic.

She raises a brow. “Feeling festive all of a sudden?”

He shrugs, and the restraint it takes to keep his eyes from rolling is tangible. “I thought about what you said. Looked into it. You were right.”

“I was? Do you want to talk about it?"

"No," he says, before continuing on anyway (her habit, Alma notices, but can't remember when he absorbed that one). “It’s comfortable. And... Felix made all of us get some.”

He grins, pulling her close, changing the subject with the brush of his lips over her cheek. Mason is very good at changing the subject when he wants to. “You ready?”

“Let’s see if we pulled it off.”

[bleedinglovehes]

liam payne sucks tbh

This compilation is for my dear friend, who goaded me into making a comprehensive list of every time Liam Payne has been openly homophobic in the past ten years, with a couple of bonuses at the end! Because he has been. A lot. He’s displayed his privilege and offended LGBTQ+ people on multiple occasions and shows no signs of even attempting to educate himself or empathize with those his words have hurt. On that note, let us begin this journey.

Let’s start with the obvious, shall we? The infamous Duck Dynasty's Family Values tweet. Anyone who’s been in the One Direction fandom should be able to easily recall the incident, but I’ll break it down for you. On January 18th Liam tweeted about how he loved the “family values” on Duck Dynasty. By that time, it was know that the family was openly homophobic. Just one month prior, in December 2013, the families patriarch (Phil Robertson) was suspended from the show following homophobic remarks that received backlash. (He compared homosexuality to beastiality).Liam immediately received backlash for the tweet, for good reason, so later that day he took to twitter to claim that “Being a fan of someones show and the way they still hold a family together doesn't mean i am ok with all they say”. (https://twitter.com/LiamPayne/status/424679109634314240) That was his “apology”. Now, Liam’s association with the Robertson’s did not end there. 8 months later he posted a happy birthday message from Willie Robertson (Phil’s son) on his instagram. Though his interacting with the Robertsons had upset many LGBT+ people, Liam continued to openly support the family.The very next month he, and close friend Andy Samuels (pay attention to that name, we’ll reference it later) went shooting in Louisiana with the family. Andy and Willie Robertson’s sister in law both posted about the event at the time, but the posts have since been deleted.

Now if you were one of the delusional people still convinced of Liam’s membership in the LGBT+ community, you may find lot’s of faults in my logic. Him supporting a family sticking together doesn’t mean he shares their homophobic values, and you’re right, to an extent. But a queer person would not be so careless. Liam is displaying his privilege as a straight white man by ignoring the disgusting homophobia displayed by the patriarch, and likely shared by his sons and grandchildren. So, with that incident we have, at the very least, hopefully shown the audience Liam’s blatant ignorance when it comes to the LGBT community.

Let’s continue. 2014 was the start of a startling trend of tasteless comments Mr. I-Used-To-Be-In-1D-Now-I’m-Free has made in relation to the community. In August of 2015, Liam said that Girl Almighty (a One Direction song he wrote on) is about "trying to find that number one woman of your life” which would have been fine, except he went on to say that “none of [the fans] can relate to, because most of you are girls. Except for the boys in here, you know what I'm talking about." Almost immediately, his remarks were under fire for being too heteronormative, and he was accused of being homophobic. Instead of using the incident as a learning experience, Liam took to twitter to first clarify he is “in no way shape or form homophobic that's a ridicules thing to say and I'm not here to offend people so take it as you will”. Essentially, rather than apologize to every LGBT girl at the show, he decided to say since he’s not homophobic the comments weren’t offensive. He went on in another tweet and called the statement that deeply offended his non straight female fans “throwaway”. All I can gather from his little twitter tirade is that Liam was upset that his “throwaway” comment hurt LGBT people and that those people would not let it go. He finished by tweeting “crap end to a good day”, blaming the backlash rather than his own ignorant comment. All of the tweets are still on twitter and a quick search will bring them up for you.

2015 was a big year for Liam in terms of casual homophobia, and just one month after the Girl Almighty Incident, he was back at it again with… The Pride Flag Incident. Now, to provide some background, pride flags started making appearances at the shows in large numbers thanks to The Rainbow Project. The project was started to promote a safe space for LGBTQ+ fans. It garnered a lot of attention and the starters of the project clarified several times that it had nothing to do with the infamous “Larry” ship, which I will not discuss as frankly it’s not relevant to my main point. So a month before the Pride Flag Incident The Rainbow Project was getting attention from the media. Anyone who took two seconds to research the project and motivation behind it would know that it was only to support queer fans.

Okay but seriously, the Pride Flag Incident was a big deal. Let me explain. In the summer of 2015, gay marriage was legalized in the US. LGBTQ Americans were absolutely thrilled, for good reason, and pride flags were seen in abundance. So here’s what happened. Liam was interviewed by Attitude, a UK gay magazine. Now he started off alright, claiming that he found it, “funny that being gay is still something that’s talked about as though it’s not natural”. The use of the term “funny” is… troublesome for me, but that’s not the issue with the article. It’s his next statements that, once again, show his ignorance. He talked about there being an increase in rainbow flags at One Direction shows following the legalization of gay marriage. He made the correct point and he should've stopped there. Unfortunately, he continued, saying “I think that was mainly because people think of the Louis and Harry thing, which is absolutely nuts and drives me insane.” Once again he ignored the huge queer fanbase One Direction had amassed at that point and was subject to backlash. He, once again, took to twitter and, once again, stood by his ignorant comments rather than make a real apology. I won’t bring up Harry. I won’t bring up Harry. I won’t bring up Harry. I won’t bring up Harry… ok fine I have to. Harry actually waved a pride flag at the next concert they had. AKA, the one right after Liam’s comments were made public. Harry was, according to Liam, one of the people being disrespected by the pride flags.

I’m sensing a trend here. Liam makes an ignorant comment that offends people, Liam goes on twitter and stands by the ignorant comments, Liam claims people offended are in the wrong. Moving on, I'm honestly not sure what Liam did in 2016. I think that’s when Strip That Down was released. Anyways he only offended…. every one direction stan with that.

2017 though, that one was big. That’s when Liam made The Clothing Comments. So in May he was on the radio, probably promoting something, and was asked which members of One Direction he would let watch his child. He said that he’d pick Louis, because he’s a dad, and that neither Harry nor Niall made the cut. The issue? His reasoning behind why Harry wasn’t a suitable babysitter was that, “I couldn’t rely on Harry because I feel that my child would come out dressed in something that I just wouldn’t understand”. Yet. Another. Ignorant. Comment. Harry had, beginning in 2014 and continuing to 2020, been dressing in a non traditionally masculine way. 2014 had him sporting pussy bow blouses while 2020 has gifted us with a lace jumpsuit equipped with matching lace gloves. Now, therein lays the issue with his comment. Harry doesn’t dress in a traditionally masculine way. That was apparent in 2017. That’s what Liam had an issue with. Also, Liam has been making comments about Harry’s fashion sense on a semi consistent basis since that article dropped so… yea.

2018’s… incident… is almost funny to me because once again Liam display’s absolute ignorance when it comes to the LGBT community. It began with Liam taking place in Adidas’s Prouder campaign in June. It was sponsored by a bunch of celebrities and an article was released where each gave a quote about what makes them proud, obviously in relation to Pride. When Liam was asked the question he answered “I think since I’ve had a little boy, everything changes in life. ‘I’m aiming more for him to be prouder of me, and already he’s making me a better man, which I think is incredible.’” He did not reference the community he was supposedly supporting. He received immense backlash for his “straight pride” comments on twitter and gay news outlet Pink News.All in all it was just insensitive. He was dragged on twitter for not knowing the meaning of pride and the movement he was supporting.That’s not where the incident ended though. On July 7th London hosted the annual Pride Parade, that I’ve heard Liam promised to attend. I do not have receipts for this, so my next point may seem a little weak at first, but stay with me. Instead of attending the event, Liam attended a Dolce and Gabbana fashion show. Why might that be an issue? Well, since 2015, the fashion label has been called homophobic after two directors made insensitive comments about same sex parenting. So, if you don’t believe he promised to attend the show, the fact that he attended a show for a homophobic brand should upset you.In fact, Liam has shown no indication of distancing from the brand. In contrast, Harry has only been seen wearing Dolce and Gabbana once since the comments were made. (Performing on the Jimmy Kimmel show in Nov. 2015). Liam has worn D&G several times in the years since the comments were made.

2019 was a bad year for Liam, and not just because he took Zayn, Harry, and Niall’s number ones and slapped them together to debut at #111 on the Billboard Hot 100. In July he was paid by the Saudi Regime to perform in Saudi Arabia. The issue? In Saudi Arabia being gay is a crime and women’s rights activists are jailed. Nicki Minaj was also set to perform at the festival but backed out due to the Saudi Regime’s blatant homophobia and sexism. Once again he displayed his ignorance and privilege. He’s not queer, he’s not a woman. So he accepted the money and performed. Now I know he had fans there excited to see him, but he made the wrong choice. He should’ve backed out and not accepted any money from the Saudi Regime. July was just not a good month for Liam.So he was asked whether or not he planned to vote in the election. His response? “I think I will vote but I am always out of the country. We need a mobile app where we can vote with our thumbprint or something. I mean, in regards to Boris or Jeremy, I don’t think we give people enough time. Same with West Brom football club. They always change their manager every week it seems and we never get time to gel with anybody.” He’s just so ignorant. As a rich white straight man, the election had no effect on him. He seemed to indicate a preference for Boris Johnson, a racist sexist homophobe. December was by far his worst though. So his debut album, LP1, dropped at the beginning of the month. Immediately, Liam was attacked for his fetishization of bisexual woman, seen in the song “Both Ways”. It’s just disgusting, and made worse by his history with the LGBTQ community. A straight man singing about how hot it is that his girlfriend likes girls is just… so bad. That whole incident speaks for itself in my opinion. That brings us to the reappearance of his comments about Harry’s clothing. He claimed that “I couldn’t put myself in that. I’d look fucking… It’d look weird.” Now, has anyone seen what Liam has worn over the years? Liam’s issue is that the Met Gala look was feminine. He’s claimed to be the antichrist version of Harry, and you know what? I see it. He’s a straight man uncomfortable with men wearing feminine clothing and gay people in general. Harry is a queer man who thrives in feminine styled or women’s clothing. They really are opposites.

So what have I established? A pattern of ignorance that have hurt LGBT people on multiple occasions. Now, ignorance does not equate homophobia, so here’s how we know. Remember his friend Andy Samuels? Well he’s been openly homophobic (and sexist) on his social media. He’s been friends with Liam for over a decade. Remember when Harry made his iconic “not that important” comment? Liam’s reaction is… troublesome. He does a short laugh, and then glances off camera with an uncomfortable look on his face. Take from that what you will. There are UNCONFIRMED rumors of Liam using homophobic language backstage at One Direction concerts. Like with his reaction to Harry’s “not that important'' comment, there is no proof, but, based on his other actions, I am inclined to believe it happened. So there you have it. Liam’s history of ignorance. Homophobia is defined as a “dislike of or prejudice against homosexual people”. I think it’s safe to say that applies to Liam. He’s uncomfortable with feminine styled men, supports homophobes (The Duck Dynasty family, Dolce and Gabbana, Boris Johnson), and makes ignorant comments that are extremely offensive to LGBTQ people. He may not go around screaming slurs, but he is homophobic. He’s the type of homophobic person who claims not to be because he knows a gay person. Who claims the pattern of ignorance is simply the fault of the one getting offended. That’s who Liam Payne is. Look, you don’t have to agree that he’s homophobic, but you have to agree that he’s ignorant and refuses to get educated. And you have to admit that there is no way he’s LGBT. There is no way anyone could orchestrate a smear campaign that relied on so many casually ignorant statements and incidences.

This post was not my fault. Really. It’s wasn’t. It’s actually my friend’s fault. She told me that there were people on tumblr who actually believe Liam Payne is LGBTQ+. Shocking, I know. She also said that some people were comparing the experiences of Liam, a straight man, to Harry, his queer former bandmate. Which, no? And because I am so sure people will deny everything I have presented, a link to a google doc with links to each article and tweet I referenced has been included. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1i2lWQPr0oQeA_MYLdkmp6G19waj9KSYaQgcBek8O2OE/edit?usp=sharing

[nightswithkookmin]

What you think of fetus V who said in front of everyone "You seem to really like men" to Jimin? Youthful ribbing? Or a moment of insensitivity ? FWI saying you like girls or guys? Or calling close same sex friends u a couple? is actually common where am from. This has happened in my friend circle too actually. Except all of us are hets so no one take it seriously. Cant think a closeted person would find it that funny. Jimins lack of denial or even laughing it off always stood out to me tho.

What do I think of that comment?

I think we both know very often when people say they think a man likes men, they mean to say they think that man is Gay and very often when the g-word is used in a sentence, it is not meant as a compliment- imma give it to you straight, no bs. Lol.

The parlance gay and variations of it, in my opinion, is often used ubiquitously and traditionally as a slur slang among ignorant, non-progressive, anti homosexual individuals and is often rooted in malice.

And when malice isn't intended, ridicule is. The sad fact is, people adopt the terminology as ammunition to blatantly attack, dehumanize, belittle and strip away the dignity of queer folks and when the term is used in reference to non queer people it has a similar effect. It degrades them as well through the irony and humor of comparing them to gay people.

Gay jokes, if you will, is a subtle art of passive aggressively slurring gay folks if you think about it. I mean let's be honest.

Personally, I don't think Tae's intentions in that moment were malicious at all. I don't think he blurted out those words with the intension to ridicule Jimin either- stay with me. It will make sense in a bit.

But he called Jimin gay nevertheless. His comment if a joke, I'm afraid, reinforces these bizzare stereotypes of masculinity and promotes toxic rhetorics prevalent especially within Kpop shipping communities where every Male idol interaction is hyper sexualised and romanticized thus, suggesting a man cannot love another man, be affectionate or be fond of them unless they secretly lusted after them and harbored a desire to lay down pipes in their behinds- which, honestly is crazy coming from a guy with a cultural background such as the Korean culture where kinship is commonplace but more on that later.

I think whatever which way we want to look at it, it was an insensitive comment especially if you believe he meant it as a joke. It was definitely not his most woke moment, socially and culturally- and that's putting it lightly.

That 'gay' comment to me is right up there with all the problematic statements some, if not all, of the members have made over the years- the colorism, racist jokes, the ' eww, you too black,' 'akekeke- you too tanned shoo,' implying if you're black or tanned you are ugly. The fat jokes, the misogyny and misogynior- please don't ask me to give you examples of these. I don't want to ruin BTS for you. Lol.

There are commentaries on these out there on the internet. You can look it up for yourselves- You welcome. Lol.

For the record, BTS have since retracted, acknowledged and apologized for most of these questionable moments throughout the years and so we cannot hold it against them, forever- not to make excuses for them but they are human too. They learn, they unlearn, they make mistakes, they correct them, they grow and as NamJoon said, they really were a bit 'unsophisticated' and rough around the edges in their earlier years- even if it was just five years ago from now, chilee. They is a mess. Lmho.

I think it's all part of the human process honestly- don't worry BTS, I have a lot of space in my heart for y'all to be human and still love ya. Keep going sweeties. Y'all's doing greatness de la grande kind!! Bless y'all.

In V's case he was, since that incident, put as a judge on a show that allegedly featured queer folks and he seemed more welcoming of them than the other judges on the panel, excluding RM of course.

A year later, he would make a song that the LBGTQ plus fraction of Army would rally behind as a highly pro gay song- Stigma, which I find debatable but whatever. I mean, just because JK has stars, clouds and the sky in his lyrics don't make him an astronaut or an environmentalist fighting the good cause for the climate but to each his own.

Stigma was still something, I'll give him that.

Flashforward to five years later, and he would be recommending songs by gay artists, appreciating and promoting gay art and the artists behind them, sporting rainbow outfits, designing a BT21 character that is genderless, incorporating sign language in his speeches- he polished up. Woke the hell up. Politically correct. Yadda yadda yadda.

I think, like some of the others, he too learned his lesson. It's not ok to trivialize the oppression of others or make light of it-

Now that we've gotten the woke bit out of the way, on to our shipping business. Follow me, chop chop. Lol.

Firt of all, I don't think that moment is a big deal. But I find it interesting nonetheless.

Do I think Tae was teasing Jimin in that moment when he made that statement? It's not quite easy as yes or no.

Personally, I think he was clocking him.

This interview was conducted at a point in the timeline where I feel Jimin was shedding his image as the Maknae obsessed hyung in the group. He was coming into his own and embracing himself for who he is and that I think included his sexuality.

Prior to, he had in my opinion, since debut, slipped into the role of the queer jest of the group supplying queer humor and entertainment for listeners at radio shows by offering himself up for ridicule as the 'gay guy' within the group- I hated every bit of it. Lol.

You'd often hear the members refer to him as the one good with the guys, the boy in love with the Maknae- There is still a fraction of Army that see him as this persona but he has since outgrown that label and that phase.

RM was basically the Black jest of the group, offering himself up for ridicule for his darker skin tone right down to his blaccent. Can you do your black accent? They will ask him at interviews and he would proceed to deliver a walmart version of the Black American English. Sigh.

Compared to the previous year where he literally gasped and panicked when the members hinted at his sexuality or made statements that put his sexuality into question, Jimin seemed more in control and mentally prepared during this interview.

When the question was asked of him, the question of why he liked JK, his instincts it seemed was to steer the conversation away from his sexuality- a tactic the rest of the members would employ to avoid discussing Jikook a few months from that interview...

I mean, when Tae asked Jimin on JK's birthday that same year what he wanted to give JK, RM cut in before JM answered. Jimin had done the same thing when in an interview JK was asked if Jimin wasn't his style and JK was stuttering not knowing what to say in response. JM asked him not to answer the question.

When interviewers ask these questions, they do so for entertainment purposes- because who doesn't like gay jokes, amirite?

For heterosexual idols I assume it's not slippery slope for them to engage in these kinds of humor. They can play gay without risking exposing their heterosexuality and when they do play gay it's for jest.

It's not the same for queer idols I think.

Jimin was basically done being the butt of the gay jokes in 2015, he was done selling himself as the JK shit rainbows and I'm the unicorn fixated on him kinda person and it reflected in that conversation.

'I don't like everything about this boy. He ain't all that. But he is the Maknae and he cute so whatever' lol.

Like I said, I think Jimin was steering the conversation away from his sexuality but Tae's comment steered the conversation right back to it. 'I just think he likes men.'

Most South Koreans I've met in person and on the internet spend a considerable amount of time and energy trying to dispel the western notion of gayness projected on to Korean men for their skinship culture.

We like to glamorize gayness in these streets but in reality gay is stigmatized especially in places like South Korea. People don't readily read gay in Male interactions unless they were being homophobic or socially unaware.

To me, Tae's statement was more of an observation about Jimin, one which he felt a need to contribute to the discussion they were having, perhaps to provide insight into the inner workings of Jimin rather than as a joke or jest- or may be he did both.

Jimin managed to avoid opening himself up for the gay jokes and to this Tae then responded, I just think you is gay sir- The emphasis has been mine. Lol.

The thing about Tae is, in the earlier days he used to have a habit of 'exposing' Jimin whenever Jimin told half truths and what not.

For example, in 2014 during an interview when JM was asked what he wanted to do on his free days he had said he wanted to spend time with his family or something and Tae immediately checked him saying he was lying. Jimin then said he wanted to be with Jungkook which had JK fuming.

Was he teasing JM when he called him out for lying about his true desires? May be but I think he meant it too. Know what I mean?

He did the same thing when during their Paris VLive, Jimin got nervous when JK was singing 'know you love me boy, so that I love you,' in the background and Tae asked Jimin if he was nervous. Jimin snapped out of whatever whipped trance he was in and asked 'why would I be nervous' or something along those lines.

Why would Tae assume JM was nervous listening to another man sing? And why would Jimin be nervous in the first place?

And if at an interview Jimin is asked, why don't you like listening to the Maknae sing and JM responded that he is cute but he can't sing and Tae says well I think listening to Jk sing makes him nervous- would that be youthful ribbing or tea? Do you see where I'm going with this?

I see Tae as very observant- If not more observant than Jk. Their jokes are punchier because it is rooted in truth. He is stating his opinion, his observations and when he felt JM's answers were dishonest or inconsistent of his general notion of him, he called him out on that.

It's like him saying JM likes to pretend to be drunk in order to tell Tae he loves him- allegedly. Was it funny, yes. Was it a lie? I don't think so.

Jimin likes to pretend, we been knew. His boyfriend don spilled that tea already. I mean Jk said JM faked being asleep when he noticed the cameras filming him. He said also JM knows he is cute so sometimes he intentionally acts cute.

Tae used to tease Jimin a lot- hell he still teases him a lot to this day. Lol. Had Jimin looking at the back of his head like he wanted to quick punch him in the throat in the recent run, chilee. Lmho.

But you gotta ask, where is the lie in all those jokes?

The question I ask myself, and I think we ought to ask ourselves as shippers is, what about Jimin gave Tae that impression of him in the first place?

What made Tae, coming from a culture and background where 'gay' is a taboo and skinship is prevalent assume that if Jimin liked JK then it was because he liked men or was gay?

Even if Tae meant it as a Joke- no one laughed. Lol. That awkward silence that ensued... now that's how you know he had deadass made a 'gay comment' for real. Lmho.

They were all silent, waiting for JM's response and only laughed when JM responded to Tae- isn't that how it usually goes when you are the one queer person at the het dinner table? The tasteless jokes, awkward silences and stares? Just me? Oh, never mind then. Keep reading. Lol.

Imagine if JM hadn't responded or had gay panicked like he did a year before that interview, when RM revealed JK had been sneaking into JM's bed at night?

Dude was legit ready to throw JK under the bus had it not been for the shady camera guy behind the cameras. Deadass, Jimin was pointing accusing fingers at JK and everything- so much for gay love. Lmho.

The question still remains, what makes you look at your heterosexual friend and go- hey, that's gay. Think about it.

If Tae thought Jimin liked men, even as a joke, it's probably because Jimin had been giving him a reason or reasons to believe he actually liked boys beyond the usual daily doze of gay prevalent within K-culture.

It's similar to JK feeling uncomfortable when Jimin in 2014 described their relationship as one between love and friendship. Jimin responding with male friends can love eachother too without being gay would imply JK was interpreting his words and actions towards him as laced with romantic and sexual subtext or intent.

Now why would JK assume this if men touching men and feeling up on eachother in their culture was a normal thing?

There are gay men in Korea you know?

Tae and Kook were both hyper aware and curious of Jimin's sexuality in that period- for different reasons of course. In my opinion.

Not sure if Jimin's androgynous features played a role in these suspicions and assumptions they had of him in the early days because androgynousity in men is often ignorantly profiled and stereotyped as queer.

Tae seemed convinced JM was queer at least and JK was projecting his own queerness on to Jimin a lot- cough, cough.

It seemed to me also that Tae for whatever reason had the impression JM had a thing for him? I'll save my VMin agenda for delulu Fridays but chilee I don't know, Jimin has been on an agenda to friendzone that man since those manly mans thawed off his chest. Lol.

VMIN... ok.

I mean Jimin's response to Tae was more to deflate Tae's ego than to deflect or evade the issue and I wonder why. 'You are so full of yourself' 'I may like men, but I don't like you' and Tae responds with 'really' as if he's been challenged or dared- ever had your straight friends assume you like them just because you are queer?

Anywho, for whatever reason, Jimin seemed to be the only member in the group around the early days whose words and actions were put through the queer litmus test.

Also, I think a distinction ought to be made between calling two same sex friends a couple and calling them gay.

Calling two friends a couple is inconsequential- except when their sexuality is on the line. Calling two same sex friends you know are straight a couple is nothing but a gay joke.

BTS do this all the time. Jimin called Namjin a couple, Tae kook a couple, himself and Suga a couple, himself and JK a couple.

Jk has equally referred to others within the group as a couple, made heart signs above them, and have even held his chest and said he never thought he would fall for a guy.

In none of these instances did he or any of them imply that they or the persons they were referring to were queer or liked men and I wouldn't make much of such comments.

When JK was called out for gifting a present to Jimin and not the others, Tae teased JK as well and his gestures implied to me, 'it's ok to like him, I know you like him, you like JM don't you, uWu' and other variations of these.

But he in no way hinted at the sexuality of JK explicitly or implicitly- not in a way that prompts a response or rebuttal from JK like it did in Jimin's case.

I guess what I'm saying is that, that moment is nothing but something at the same time. You look at Tae's personality and his reputation within the group as the one with no filter who blurts out things that often has BTS running helter skelter- that 'I want to see your children" comment at Festa almost gave RM an aneurysm. Lmho.

Then they had to literally take his mic away from him when he started talking about meeting a pretty chick or something at a fansigns.

You consider the history between him and Jimin, the context behind that comment and the things that was said after that comment- the interviewer said 'well JK is really handsome...' which means he took the 'joke' Tae had made to mean JM had romantic interest in JK- something I feel JM was trying to avoid.

I don't think Tae meant anything by it. I don't think he knew at the time JM was queer but I do believe he suspected he was.

Hope this helps,

Signed,

GOLDY

[captain-kit-adventuress]

I received an excellent ask from @the-gay-lady-of-ravenclaw-tower and I was happy to answer it, but because I am a Tumblr old I accidentally replied to the first part of the ask instead of the second, and now it’s gone. So I’m going to reproduce it and include my answer below. I hope this can help others, too! Fair warning that I am long-winded and the post is very long as well. If anyone has suggestions about how to make it more readable (I have ADHD and long blocks of text are not my friend, so I get it), send me a message and let me know!

Hi, Ryn! Sorry if this ask is intrusive, feel free to ignore. You're the first non-binary person I've seen on here who's really fully an adult (to me grown up = older than 30-35) and I was wondering if you had any advice you'd like to share with younger queer/non-binary kids. In particular I was wondering how you navigate using gender-neutral pronouns in the workplace and how you build a community/found family with other queer adults. (1/2)

I'm 18, and it's easy to see other queer kids around me in college, but it feels like a bubble. I worry about the world outside of this microcosm and how to navigate queerness in the future. Seeing queer adults like you who have successfully made it through their 20s and survived in the "real world" while building a community is really hopeful for me, especially considering the world was much more hostile in your formative years than mine. Thanks :) (2/2)

Let me first apologize for taking so long on this ask, I wanted to give a considered answer.

I’m honored that you would ask in the first place. I take advice-giving pretty seriously, especially when someone is reaching out to me because they’re hoping to take advantage of any experience I might have from being on the planet longer. I want to introduce a couple of caveats, though, so you can take my advice in the context it deserves. 

As you mentioned, I did grow up in a world that was quite a bit more hostile to queerness. On top of that, I’m sure you know we just didn’t have easy access to queer information, and it was a lot more visible when someone was seeking it. Because of this, I didn’t actually figure out my queerness (though I suspected for decades) until a few years ago. However, I’ve tried to throw myself into the queer community as hard as I’m able, and I was always a queer ally. So I’ve been on the fringes for a really long time, even though it’s only now that I’ve been able to experience it from a place of openness. On the other hand, I do think there’s value in that situation, as well, so, take all of this for what you will.

The other caveat is that I left the traditional workplace prior to my accepting my queerness. I have never had to deal with pronoun issues, and I also come from a place of having the luxury of a decent relationship with my original pronouns. I am non-binary, but I’m ok (for the most part) with people using she/her for me. That said, my background is in accounting, and the firms I worked for, on the whole, probably would not have been thrilled about neutral pronouns, much less neopronouns, especially with anything client-facing. Some of the feelings about this are changing, and some are not. It’s very industry-specific and employer specific, so I feel like the best advice I can give in this situation is to be safe, in whatever way that works for someone. 

I would love to just say have the conversation with your employer in terms of pronouns and presentation and that if they’re not willing to accept even the idea of it, you know that they weren’t probably going to treat you with dignity and respect about being outside of the binary, but because society hasn’t caught up in their understanding and acceptance of anything but cisgender and heteronormative ideals, it is still a privilege too many are excluded from. Why human dignity and respect are treated as privileges, I shall never know, but that’s how it is for so many at this moment in time. So all I can say is try your best to assert yourself in whatever way is safest for you, and to know that there are lots of adults rooting for you and willing to help when and where they can, even if we can’t change everything immediately. It still sucks that we have to couch it this way, but I do think it’s important to remember that at least in some places we can have the conversation. It’s not enough, and it will never be enough until we don’t have to think about it anymore, but change is always going to be too slow for marginalized communities. 

The found family is where I feel most comfortable answering. My peer group, the oldest Millennials, was really the first youth group to benefit from the presence of ubiquitous, reliable internet as a way to find new relationships, whether platonic, romantic, whatever. And I have to say, we found it in the same ways then as a lot of young adults do now: fandom spaces, very primitive means of social media (ah, the heady days of the message board), various websites and communities that we, along with a lot of other age groups, built. I personally met most of my found family through a fandom space, and while none of us really retain ties to that fandom anymore, our love for each other has only grown. The rest of my sort of extended found family, if you will, I met through in-person spaces, like the classes I took in college, things like that. I think one of the most important pieces of that puzzle is not being afraid to reach out through your interests. I also think that’s not so different from when I was around your age. The spaces themselves are a lot different to navigate, and I do not envy you with the sort of omni-present fight against purity culture, which we did not really have to address, but building a community is pretty much the same no matter if it’s online, in-person, formalized like a city, or anything else. It takes work and commitment and a willingness to see it succeed, and it will change and evolve a lot as you go on. Not all found family is permanent, and there’s nothing wrong with that, either. There are people who have passed out of my life, and rightly so, that I was certain at the time would be with me forever. But it’s ok. I grew as a person, and I grew in a different direction than worked for our relationship. I grew in a direction that brought me toward my found family. 

I should also probably point out that my found family is, on the whole, not queer. A few of us are, or have ties to queerness, but there’s a variety of sexualities, genders, etc. I think you’re right to say that queerness can be kind of a bubble, but there are lots of people who want to embrace what may have started out as queer ideals because they recognize it’s how they want to live, even if they themselves are not queer. I think especially people my age and younger are realizing that they want families that are supportive and nurturing, and I am sorry to say it but that’s rooted in queerness in a way that most normative family dynamics are not. We’ve had no choice, we either had each other or no one else. Queerness, on some level, means found family—or at least queerness that doesn’t rely on trying to emulate the cisgender heteropatriarchy for acceptance. So the two ideas are really intertwined and it’s completely understandable why so many queer people gravitate toward families they built themselves. How to do that is as varied as any queer experience, but comfortingly, it’s still the same as any other kind of relationship at its core. Give it time, which is no one’s favorite advice, but that is the best I’ve got. Make sure you’re getting what you need in addition to helping others with what they need. Be kind and loving and supportive, and above all, bring compassion to the table every moment that you can. Empathy is good, too, but compassion and kindness will steer you better, I think, more often than empathy will. 

I know this is an incredibly long answer, and this is as concise as I could make it. These are big questions, and I am not a concise person by nature. :) Good luck, and I’m here to talk if you need, and that extends to any queer young adults that want advice. We have to band together, we all have so many wonderful things to contribute, and I for one am looking forward to seeing what you and your peers add to the discussion over the years.

[tuesdayisfordancing]

A few loosely connected thoughts about ship wars, fandom purity culture, antis, etc. Apologies for the awkward attempt at nested bullets.

Almost everyone has natural selectivity where they remember bad things said about the stuff they like more than bad stuff said about stuff they don’t like, interpret it as harsher, etc.

Once you’ve received even one actual hate message, gotten harassed even one time, this bias to interpret someone mentioning that they dislike your fave as an ATTACK intensifies.

Ships and characters that get a lot of hate, that become Acceptable Targets(TM) are almost always also REALLY POPULAR - sometimes (often?) the most popular ship by numbers. I think, in combination with the fact that we all make judgements without full context (most people don’t actually publish the anon hate they get, and if you don’t follow someone you don’t necessarily know how they got harassed for X opinion a while back and Y seemingly innocuous comment is or seems like a renewal of that harrassment) this can lead to non shippers-of-the-thing-or-likers-of-the-character thinking that the shippers or stans just have a persecution complex. “Not everybody has to cater to you, I’m allowed to not like things, yeesh don’t take everything so personally” goes the thought. This overlooks how vastly unpleasant it is to be the Acceptable Target for nasty comments even if you have a lot of friends in the boat with you.

Something feeling like an ATTACK is not necessarily about the intensity with which dislike is expressed, but the WAY dislike is expressed. It can be hard to express why a particular statement felt like it stepped over a line, further giving the impression of overreaction.

   >  An example: the first time I saw the “Gay Ship for Gay People vs Gay Ship for Straight People” meme it fucked me up, and I’m still probably not going to do a great job of articulating all the reasons, but here goes:

   >     >  First, the particular meme I saw was one where some people clearly meant it as friendly teasing, some people clearly didn’t, and others were somewhere in between. The cumulative effect was the sensation of my middle school bullies going “haha you’re a loser, just kidding, but not really, why aren’t you laughing about my funny joke about what a fucking loser you are?”

   >     >  Fandom is overwhelmingly queer and the bits that ship same sex pairings more so. As far as I can tell there aren’t any “gay ships for straight people”. The ship I first saw this about you can tell is mostly queer with the briefest of glances around tumblr. It’s hard for me to express why this matters, when the inaccuracy isn’t the point - I think it would be a shitty meme even if a same sex ship did have a higher proportion of straight shippers than queer, but I do still feel like it matters that mostly they don’t.

   >     >  A lot of queer people are insecure about their place in the queer community, either because of youth, past experience, not fitting the Awesome Queer image, general personality, whatever. Telling anybody they’re not really queer because of what they ship is a bad move, even if you meant it as friendly ribbing or contrariwise even if you can’t imagine how a queer person could enjoy that ship.

   >     >  Man, imagine if I fucking switched it. Hell woulda rained down. So maybe it’s not such a joke?

   >     >  Having been exposed to this meme in a few other fandoms and contexts now, it doesn’t explicitly say it, but it has strong connotations of the whole “queer things are more moral and more moral things are queer” attitude that... I don’t know if it’s actually more common than it used to be or more sincere than it used to be or what, but *gestures inarticulately* Bad! Increases shame in people whose well-being you care about!

   >     >  It’s a meme making a direct claim about “the type of people who ship x” which is, in fact, in type if not intensity, an attack on the shippers rather than an expression of dislike of the ship. Even if it’s a technically neutral claim - first of all come on, it isn’t neutral around these parts, and actually I’m not sure there’s a second of all because I don’t think anyone makes these generalizations about actually neutral-in-fandom-spaces-attributes. And it’s perfectly set up to make you look dumb and oversensitive for getting defensive.

Okay, done with the example, sorry that took so long. Where the fuck was I. Oh right, onto: Tumblr Infrastructure Makes Things Worse, Verse 700. One of the ways people try to get along despite differences of opinion is delineation of spaces. Tumblr deliberately fucks with this (in order to provide other things, but still):

   >  Did you know you can no longer prevent your organizational tags from causing things to show up in the searchable tag by using 5 filler tags? So much for that. Plus even now there are people new to tumblr who don’t know about searchable tags.

   >  But even beyond that just posting something on your tumblr is more like shouting it into the crowd than it was on livejournal, because the main way people interact with your post is to reblog it. The nature of the tumblr post as something that travels makes the difference between shouting at fandom as a whole vs. shouting to your friends vs. shouting to yourself indistinct. “May a bitch not be catty and judgmental on her own blog?!” asks the tumblr user. Well, it used to be good manners to keep the cattiest and most judgmental posts friends-locked but that isn’t an option anymore - and even the unlocked livejournal post offered a little more room for a difference between a post mostly for yourself and your friends vs a post directed AT fandom as a whole. If you were aiming your post outward you deliberately indicated that. Now people kinda... take their best guess based on Vibes? And of course everyone’s more likely to take it personally when it’s their fave and more likely to roll their eyes and say “people are allowed to dislike things on their own blog” when it’s something they dislike too and also more likely to take “X character is scum” as a neutral opinion statement if that’s the General Assessment vs. an inflammatory remark if it’s not and everything is a mess.

Pretty sure I had one more thing but meh this is long already and also if I don’t post it now I’ll start to overthink shit and never post it.

[romolite]

*Important FAQ*

Aka questions that pertain to what I usually post about or stuff I don’t like getting asks about but continue to get asks about regardless.

[Insert any invasive question about my ethnicity/race]

I’m Ghanaian American. My parents were born in Ghana and I was born here in the US. I’ve seen it more on twitter and tumblr, but Black Africans don’t like me because I’m American, and black Americans don’t like me because I’m African. So I’m stuck in the middle lmao. I’m what you’d consider a First-Generation African, my parents are Continental Africans, and if I have children, they will be considered Generational African Americans.

First Generation African: A black person born in the US to parents who were born in Africa

Generational African American: A black person born in the US to US-born black parent(s)

Continental African: A black person born in Africa to parents who were also born in Africa

Non is just a prefix, black people don’t have a monopoly on the term! I suppose you think nonbinary people are racist huh?

Yeah sure it wasnt coined by black people but the context it’s currently used as was predominantly used by black people. ALL people who are not black benefit from and contribute to antiblackness, even if they are marginalized themselves. That kind of dynamic doesnt exist in other contexts (unless we’re talking about transfem + transmisogyny, but that’s something you’d have to talk to someone who is transfem about. Plus they have their own word for  “non-transfem”). Using it in contexts outside of antiblackness is appropriative (Yall are annoying as fuck with the “non-aspec” “non-lesbian”(this term also has anti-bi roots btw) “non-bi” shit etc, stop it. You also can’t complain about the “replacement terms” lumping yall with oppressors when “non-x” does the exact same thing you’re so worried about. “Cis” puts cis gays with cis hets, cis disabled people with cis abled people, cis white people with cis poc, I could go on.) 

Plus we’re talking about marginalized groups here. Black people are a marginalized group. Binary people as a whole are not so the term nonbinary isn’t appropriate at all.  I dont take issue with terms like “nonamerican” or “nonwhite” because (obviously) whites + americans as a whole aren’t oppressed for being white or american.

Basically using "non-x” in contexts to talk about oppression bad, everything else good.

Follow up: If we can’t use non-[marginalized group], what can we use instead?

There are other words to describe the people you’re talking about

non-transfem- TME

non-LGBT- cishet, or people who aren’t LGBT

non-trans - cis

Black people don’t have a monopoly on the acronym nb! I’ll call myself nb if I want to!

At this point I dont really care, go on your antiblack crusade elsewhere and out of my inbox, I’m always gonna mean nonblack when I use the acronym nb. 

And yes, you’re antiblack as fuck if you think black people telling you “nb” stands for “nonblack” is the same as exclusionists claiming “aspec” is for autistic people.

Is x AAVE?

I have a tag dedicated to what is and is not aave and how harmful it is for nonblacks to use aave given its history. I know some things overlap with southern culture but others are specifically for black people. A lot of “stan twitter” language/slang is just repackaged AAVE. No, I can’t tell you how to stop using AAVE. Don’t tell me you’re going to try to stop using AAVE, I don’t want to hear it.

Why don’t you like the n-word being compared to LGBT slurs?

Race and Sexuality/Gender aren’t comparable topics because each deals with a different history of oppression. I don’t care about slur discourse that much because I don’t even use/reclaim any myself except the n-word.

I have a problem with nonblack LGBT people co-opting black culture and struggle(like they always do), especially for trivial online discourse.

And to be honest it goes deeper than slur discourse. Every other day someone is weaponizing the oppression of black trans women, or comparing “cishet aces/aros” in the LGBT community to white/nonblack people invading black spaces (you know, something that ACTUALLY takes resources away from the people who need it, see the cultural appropriation of Black African and Blac American culture in literally any nonblack community while black people get demonized for said culture), or tokenizing their black friends to get away with something blatantly racist. And that’s not even getting into how a lot of gay slang/stan culture is just repurposed AAVE/black culture.

And I’m not gonna lie, I’ve seen this more with exclusionist accounts than inclus accounts, but it’s still not excusable for inclus to do that either. We get erased as black gay/trans/queer/aspec people up until it’s time for discourse accounts to bring us up to one-up each other

Can you give me advice on x?

Most likely not, because I’m not an expert or an advice blog. I’ll try, but don't take my word for it. I’m also tme, able-bodied, not Jewish, singlet, etc, so I’m not able to accurately answer questions about transmisogyny, (physical?) ableism, antisemitism, “sycourse”, etc.

I might be able to give advice on school-related stuff since I just graduated high school, but remember that students are not a monolith, and what worked for me may not work for someone else.

Can I follow if I’m nonblack/a minor/cishet?

Nonblack and/or cishet can follow but watch your step, minors blacklist the #minors dni tag before following

Why do you hate Ao3?

*long sigh*

I don't, I have a problem with the fact that it allows racist and (frankly voyeuristic) pedophilic/abusive/incestuous content to exist on its platform. It’s a good concept overall, but the devs are complicit in allowing “underage” and “noncon/dubcon” fics on their platform.

And there's the fact that they somehow need donations every year despite exceeding their goal several times over each year?

What’s wrong with Hazbin Hotel/The Ships/Vivziepop?

[WIP, as I have to go into extensive detail about this and I currently don’t have the energy for it]

TLDR: Viv made a half-assed apology for supporting racists (one of whom did blackface [yes the mask was used to do blackface shut up] to mock black activist) and drawing gross content. Her current projects including Hazbin Hotel are full of anti-gay/trans/aspec (Angel Dust, Vaggie, Alastor), antisemetic (Mimzy), and racist (Vaggie again, that yellow cyclops character that I’ve forgotten the name of) content under the guise of humor. If you’re into that shit, whatever, just don’t follow me and don’t whine when I make posts criticizing it.

What’s wrong with Hamilton?

Aside from the fact that it’s very obviously glorifying slave owners and made people worldwide believe the founding fathers were good people, LMM, the creator, is nonblack. This isn't his story to tell at all. 

Can you tag x?

I have a list of things I usually tag because they come upon this blog a lot. I cannot do catch all tags, as I have way too many followers for that. The closest thing to that is the “ask to tag” tag when there’s something potentially triggering but I’m not sure what it is. Everything is tagged as “x tw”. If something is extremely triggering, I’ll tag it as “major tw”

Do you tag slurs?

I tag slurs I’m not able to reclaim at all (i.e., d slur, f slur, t slur) or slurs I can reclaim but are being used as a slurs. I don’t tag the n-word, as I reclaim that one. I always tag the r slur

Can I message you about something/someone?

Unless you’re a mutual, most likely no. My DMs are only open to mutuals.

Do you want to be mutuals?

I don’t usually follow back people who follow me, especially if you’re under 16 or post things I’m not interested in.

Why is it important to have byf or about?

1) So I know gross people aren’t following me. This is not up for discussion

2) So I know someone’s not speaking out of their lane, which tends to happen a lot. (i.e, someone refusing to disclose that they are tme when discussing transmisogyny, someone not having their race listed when discussing racism)

3) Some people don’t want to interact with people under 18 or over like 30 or something.

Yeah, yeah, people aren’t entitled to personal information and all that crap but I have a serious problem with people speaking on topics from a place of privilege. Not to say they can’t talk about those things, just perhaps add a disclaimer that you’re privileged when talking about these things and be open to criticism, and NOT blocking people of the said marginalized group when they tell you something you’ve said was problematic.

I also have a problem with people who are intentionally vague about their age. There’s a difference between interacting with someone who’s 20 and someone who’s 29. I don’t want to say it’s the opposite for minors but at the same time there’s a difference for saying something racist at 13 and doing so at 17, and keeping your age vague makes it harder to determine how to deal with something like that. (Not that 13-year-olds shouldn’t know better, it’s just I don’t feel whole ass callout posts and receipt blogs are necessary for someone of that age).

Also anyone under 16, I can't stop you from following, but keep your interaction limited, please. This isnt an 18+ blog but I do rb suggestive jokes from time to time

I sent you an ask and you never answered it!

It’s likely that

I never got it

You were blocked

I’ve already answered this or it’s been answered in my faq

It’s a random positivity ask (which I appreciate but not sure how to respond to those)

You were rude in your ask and I didn’t feel like answering

I forgot until it was too late, which happens when my inbox gets a lot of asks at a time.

You sent it to the wrong blog (I.e, sending asks about my ocs to this blog instead of @ochood )

Hey, the op is [insert post] is [someone on my dni]! I usually double-check myself, just to be sure.

Have you heard about [someone who is mutuals with someone I’m loosely connected with]?

Most likely, no. And unless they’re an immediate danger to someone or they’ve got my name in their mouth, I don’t care.

Do you know who [x person/group/thing] is?Most likely no. Not to sound like a hipster but I don't usually keep up to date with trends. If I do hear about something, it’s most likely from twitter or Instagram.

Why am I blocked? Check here.

Why do you continuously move mains/change URLs/update themes?

I’m inconsistent. And sometimes there are posts on my blog that I no longer stand by.

Can I tag you in posts I think I’d like?Of course! 

[madzilla84]

hi i went through your ace tag and it was rlly comforting in a way. can i ask when u knew or how to deal (if its not to invasive!) thx

Hi anon! I’m glad you liked the posts - I know I can be pretty iffy at tagging so I’ll make sure to keep everything there if I can :)

It’s not invasive at all! The answer’s very long though, lol, because it’s me, so I put it under the read more.

I talked a bit about this in my post last year with the clumsy metaphor for my II denim jacket as sexuality, so if you read that then I might be repeating myself a bit, apologies.

The very short answer is that on some level I’ve always known, and I handled it Extremely Badly lmao. Don’t do what I did. Which was mostly nothing. XD

The longer, proper answer - I knew I was in some way Different when I found myself completely bewildered by the crushes my friends developed when we became tweens/teenagers. Like a lot of queer people, I selected my Pretend Crush and dutifully put up his poster in my locker (Noah Wyle from ER; I thought he had pretty eyes). I thought everyone else was just doing it to be cool, as well, in the same sort of way everyone pretended to love [insert name of popular band here] to save face at school.

But like, we got older, and people started making out and hooking up with Real Boys at parties, and still - I felt nothing. You’re a late bloomer, many people told me. I thought maybe I could be gay, if I had no attraction to men - but then I wasn’t attracted to women, either, so couldn’t be that. So what, then, I wondered? You can’t be nothing.

OR CAN YOU??? XD

I got to university-ish age, and around that time I went online and heard the term ‘asexual’ for the first time, and stumbled across AVEN; read the definition and thought, yep, that sounds very familiar. But the problem is, finding something out about yourself doesn’t mean you accept it, or like it, or even really believe it. I wondered then if it was actually a real thing, and not something someone on the internet had made up to make themselves feel better, because there was actually something wrong with them, and thus, with me?

I came home for Christmas during my first (only. lol whoops) year of college and brought up the subject with a small group of acquaintances at a New Years party (I’d had quite a bit to drink), and the reaction was - depressingly predictable.

That’s not a thing.

I can’t imagine that.

That sounds awful.

God, no sex? I’d rather be dead.

Have you even tried it? You need to try it.

That can’t be natural.

Okay, I get it, I thought, not bringing that up again.

And, the thing was, because I wasn’t in a relationship, or dating, or looking to, it was sort of - a non-subject. I had no prying family members asking about my love life. My true friends were unfazed by whatever I did or didn’t do (and still are, they’re good eggs), so it was just - something I never had to think about. In my mind, it was just another thing about me that made me weird and an outsider and that I didn’t belong anywhere or with anyone. (All not true! But that was then.)

And unfortunately it took me about 15 years to start to properly deal with it. Yikes. Such a long time - it’s not even about missed opportunities for dating because I’m still not looking to do that, but more about - accepting that it’s a real part of me and is okay and *good* actually and not just a peculiarity to avoid thinking about at all costs. Acceptance seemed unattainable, let alone the idea of being *proud* of it? Ha! Unthinkable. The best thing to do was just to - pretend it didn’t exist. Why poke that bruise, I thought?

I was always in this weird kind of limbo with the LGBT community - like, I felt on some level like I should be there? But at the same time, I felt like an outsider. (For many of the same reasons people to this day will tell you aces/aros don’t belong. All wrong.) I got really into queer films etc as a teen, I went to gay bars with friends and joined the uni LGBT society … and felt uncomfortable almost all the time. (I know *now* that’s because I was *still* trying to be something I wasn’t and wasn’t being honest with myself or anyone else, on any level. And a lot of the club nights we went to were basically about hooking up, which is fine and all but absolutely Not what I was looking for, and made me feel even more out of place. Why don’t I want to do that? What’s wrong with me?)

But fortunately, the world is quite a different place now, and I don’t think it’s quite so bad now for younger folks because people are talking about it *so* much more; there’s so much more help and support. And I know everyone bitches about social media but it didn’t exist when I was a teenager and there are so many ace/aro people and resources to connect with now!! We’re still made fun of almost constantly *at best* and excluded a ton and erased etc etc, but it *is* getting better. Even for us older folks still figuring it out. :)

I don’t mind admitting that Dan’s video was a huge help. (Albeit a very painful one. Part of why that video was so tough for me to watch, and still is, is that some of it hit a bit too close to home, you know? I didn’t experience the bullying he did, nor the fame, but many things were deeply recognisable.) That sort of tore the scab off (bit gross, sorry), whether I liked it or not, and made me look at it properly for the first time … well, ever, really. The period of time directly after that was - very raw, for me.

The phandom really helped, too; it’s a very accepting and welcoming community and there are actually lots of ace people! Which is awesome! Maybe I *am* a real person! ;)

So many little things helped too. I met a friend for lunch in January and she got me a glass ace flag pendant as a gift; I couldn’t believe it. I’ve felt able to bring it up with a few people outside my closest friends - eg. a couple of colleagues - and was heartened by their responses. I know they didn’t 100% get it, and that’s okay, but they were interested and open to listening and that meant a lot. I went to Pride last year and had a great time, and the first person who spoke to me there asked me where I got my ace pin. :_) (I’d been once before, in 2015, and I hated it; I felt uncomfortable and disingenuous and like I didn’t belong there, and yet I knew deep down I wasn’t technically just there as an ‘ally’.) Even Dan’s little tiny offhand mention in his mermaids stream! I was like, yeah, we do exist! 

It’s all sort of had the fringe benefit of feeling happier and better about being open about it, like joining the LGBT network at work and - you know, just taking little steps. (anyone wanting to start with me that aces/aros don’t belong in LGBT spaces can catch my tiny hands) I saw an ace lanyard at Vidcon and thought ‘yay!’ rather than being uncomfortable to wear it, partly because I thought about how happy I would be to see someone else wearing one.

I don’t know what the rest of this ‘journey’s going to look like, I just know that over the last year I’ve gotten mostly to a place where I can say I *like* being ace, because it’s actually just what I am in the same way I have brown hair or am short, and not some weird deviance from Being Normal that I Must! Hide! At All Costs! That might sound simple but it was a hard place to get to. (thanks Mr Fire, I guess)

I hope this ramble made *some* sense and answered your question in some way! Feel free to send any more questions :)

[buckybarnesbingo]

BBB Week 8 Roundup!  

Some amazing fills made this week, go forth and appreciate our creators!

Title: Flower Petals Collaborator: writing-what-writing Link: Tumblr Square Filled: K5 - Hanahaki disease Ship: Bucky/Reader Rating: Gen Major Tags: very light angst Summary: Bucky’s been coughing up flowers and the only cure is if you love him back Word Count: 863

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Title:  I’d Do It Again Collaborator: startrekkingaroundasgard Link: Tumblr Square Filled: U2 - Queer Platonic Relationship Ship: Bucky/Bruce Rating: Teen Major Tags: mention of torture, mild violence and threat Summary: After he is kidnapped, Bucky rescues Bruce from a facility which is trying to separate him from the Hulk. Word Count: 1620

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Title: As the Spirits Guide Us Collaborator: 27dragons Link: AO3 Squares Filled: Chapter 3 - K1: Poison Chapter 4 - K2: Dark Ship: WinterIron Rating: Explicit Major Tags: Alternate Universe - Prehistoric, Running Away, Spirit Animals, totem spirits, Coming of Age, Sharing a Meal, Sex, Frottage Summary: The Clan of the Hydra value’s Bucky’s skill as a flintknapper but despises him for being a crippled outsider. The Clanchief, in particular, seems to enjoy watching Bucky suffer. Bucky dreams of escaping, of finding a home with a new Clan, one which will treat him kindly. A talented maker and only child of the Keeper of the Way, Tony has only to complete this last rite before he can fully assume his place as an adult of the Star Clan. On this journey, the spirit-talker assures him, the spirits will bring him to meet his destined mate. Tony is pretty sure the selection of his mate has less to do with the spirits than with the machinations of his mother and the clan chief. Little do either of them know what the spirits have in store. Word Count: 5713

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Title: A sketch in red Collaborator: Nivelle Link: Tumblr Square Filled: Y4 - Seeing Red Ship: none Rating: Gen Major Tags: art  Summary: art

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Title: A Night at the Nat - Chapter 4 Collaborator: Politzania Link: AO3 Square Filled: K3 - apology Ship: Bucky/Clint/Tony Rating: Explicit Major Tags: werewolf & supernatural AU, minor injuries/blood, eventual smut Summary: The fancy restaurant isn’t the only reason Clint feels out of his depth. Even though his dinner companions are clearly devoted to one another, they keep flirting with him. Maybe accepting this invitation wasn’t such a good idea. Word Count: 4701

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Title: Fire in My Soul - Chapter 1 Collaborator: squadrickchestopher Link: AO3 Square Filled: C3 - free space Ship: WinterHawk Rating: Explicit Major Tags: graphic depictions of violence Summary: Natasha interrupts him. “So here’s what happened,” she says, letting her irritation bleed into her voice and her expression. Clint ducks his head even lower. “You two morons got the bright idea to get busy on a magic altar while wearing a magic amulet. Somehow, this triggered some kind of spell, and—I can’t believe this is an actual thing I’m about to say—it turned you both into little dragons.” Bucky stares at Clint, then looks down at his own claws. Then he looks back up at Nat. “What the fuck?” Word Count: 5442

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Title: Art Collaborator: startrekkingaroundasgard Link: Tumblr Square Filled: Y1 - nerd Bucky Ship: Bucky & Peter Rating: Gen Major Tags: art  Summary: Bucky had always loved science fiction. He loved to get lost in the wonder of what was possible and consider how the future could be better. When he joined the Avengers, Peter soon learned of Bucky’s interest and immediately got him started on every major sci-fi franchise he had missed over the years. Star Wars ended up being his favourite and when Peter came in brandishing his new, fully functioning lightsaber Bucky couldn’t resist having a go with the weapon. That quickly lead to costumes and a fully fledged photo shoot to commemorate the occasion. 

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Title: Red Carpet Rescue Mission Collaborator: darter_blue Link: AO3 Square Filled: B3 - Rescue Mission Ship: Stucky Rating: Mature Major Tags: meet cute Summary: Bucky Barnes can totally do this, he can fumble his way through a red carpet event and not lose his brand new nationally televised lifestyle presenter gig... he just has to remember to ask questions about the premier and NOT composting (being that he is, in fact, a Gardener and not an entertainment reporter). And when he sees a fellow sufferer in need of saving from all the lights, cameras, and hubbub, of course he's going to sidle over and be a friendly face. Except the poor, unfashionable gentleman perhaps isn't a ring in like Bucky imagined, is perhaps more famous than he looks?Is perhaps actually a real life superhero? This is just fluff and more fluff of disaster Bucky and an always charmed Captain America... Word Count: 5328

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Title: Arboreal: Songbird protocol moodboard Collaborator: menatiera Link: Tumblr Square Filled: B4 - Sunrise/Sunset Ship: WinterIron Rating: Gen Major Tags: Fluff, Bucky Barnes Needs A Hug, (Arm Maintenance), moodboard Summary: Moodboard for the fic Songbird Protocol by Arboreal. Fic summary: Tony apparently has a thing for musicians. It’s brand new information for him, but Bucky is irresistible.

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Title: we could take a chance, we could make it Collaborator: velvetjinx Link: AO3 Square Filled: K4 -  partner in crime Ship: Stucky Rating: Explicit Major Tags: historical AU Summary: Bucky likes to steal treasure. Steve likes to steal it back for its rightful owners. But when they have to team up to fight a common enemy and sparks fly, will either of them be willing to risk their hearts? Word Count: 5385

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Title: When is a bed not a bed? (When you’re not in it) - Chapter 2 Collaborator: riotfalling Link: Tumblr Square Filled: C3 - free space Ship: WinterIron Rating: Teen Major Tags: non-graphic injury and violence Summary: There’s a tiny safe house, with one tiny window and one tiny couch. And one tiny little bed. (Now with chapter 2, because no bed sharing fic is truly complete until they’re home.) Word Count: 2.5k

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Title: Inspired By You Collaborator: MagicaDraconia16 Link: AO3 Square Filled: Y5 - Invisibility Ship: Teen Rating: Bucky & Tony Major Tags: AU artist/muse, smutty inspiration Summary: It was very hard work being a muse. Especially when the person being inspired absolutely refuses to be around the source of that inspiration. Word Count: 1004

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Title: A Quiet Moment Collaborator: Caiti (Caitriona_3) Link: AO3 Square Filled: B3 - Hair braiding Ship: Bucky/Clint/Darcy Rating: Teen Major Tags: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Polyamory Summary: Natasha and Bucky spend a quiet moment together. Word Count: 1561

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Title: Funerals Are Expensive. Get Well Soon. Collaborator: Ribbonsflying Link: AO3 Square Filled: C5 - Sharing Body Heat Ship: Stucky Rating: Teen Major Tags: funeral home, morticians Summary: “Is this the part where we turn from morticians into ghost hunters?” Sam asked as they flipped out the basement lights and locked the door back behind them. ”I sure hope not.” The men began their hustle back up toward the state rooms out front when they passed the cooler and heard the noise again. Steve and Sam both stopped in their tracks. “Is that-“ Steve turned on his heel and pointed toward the refrigerated room where people’s bodies were stored.“You know I ain’t ever been scared of dead people,” Sam answered, “...but if someone in that fridge is knocking, all you’re gonna see of my brown ass is a pinprick on the horizon as I get the hell away from here as fast as I can move.” === Did you know there's a woman who has a medical condition that has caused her to go to wake up in a morgue on three separate occasions? This is a story where Bucky has that same condition. Word Count: 7382

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Title: Beetles Collaborator: Justamanlymouse Link: AO3 Square Filled: U5 - Bucky/Steve Ship: Stucky, WinterIron Rating: Gen Major Tags: Howlie memories, Light angst, tw bugs Summary: Steve hears Morgan singing a lullaby that James used to sing to him and remembers the last time he heard it.“You know the wormy song? James sings it to me before bed.” He’s going to fucking vomit. “Oh yeah?” he manages. “Yeah.” she says, molding dirt very seriously with a little spade, “Said he used to sing it to you and it helped you go to sleep. You remember that?” Word Count: 721

[laufire]

Roswell NM 2x06

I finally watched the episode (and the Legends episode, which I watched just after --a gr10 decision because it was awesome). I don’t have as many Thoughts(TM) as usual. Unsurprisingly, since Rosa isn’t in the episode and she takes three out of my four feelings. The fourth goes back and forth between Maria and Kyle, and sometimes Liz and, unfortunately, Michael xD. Anyway. I look forward to seeing her deal with her powers. And apparently her mother! I’ve wanted her to appear since episode one, so I’m excited about it (also my dumb ass only recently noticed Rosa’s middle name is Helena, like her mother, and I have Feelings about it).

I have a lot of mixed feelings wrt The Foretold Threesome (lol), thought they’re probably... different than those of most fans (I’m just still side-eying about how Maria’s racebending influenced the writers okay). I did love the conclusion, both the Alex/Michael conversation (which is my favourite scene from then in the show so far just... it pulled the right strings, yup), and the Miluca one, with her starting out insecure and the reassurances. Wrt The Drama, I’ll just say... look. I can totally see why it’d make someone feel uncomfortable, for a variety of reasons, even if I’d likely disagree with their interpretation. BUT I have NO sympathy for those that argue it was a dub/non con scene, and then only really put the blame on Maria, clearly wanting to leave a space to continue shipping Michael/Alex. Like... I just can’t believe you’d do that if you were speaking from an honest place, sorry.

I cannot belive Forrest, the WWII enthusiast is the best new romantic interest the season (yeah, I know he’s not One Of Those, it’s obvious. And he named his dog Buffy, that scored him points. But of ALL time periods you could pick for a history nerd to obsess over... WWII? Really? *Sighs*. I know it makes sense with the town’s history but STILL). Between “no public healthcare” girl and the “breeder” lesbian (who I really hope we don’t see again. Look, I do not care about whatever reasoning fellow queer people use. I fucking hate that word. The fact that she said it to a guy who was also in a gay bar makes it worse). Anyway. Yeah. The Alex/Forrest scenes were cute, too. Though I’ll say werewolf guy >>>>>>>> any stand up poetry IN THE WORLD LMAO. Pls make him a genuine character, I love him xDD.

The pseudo-horror movie plot with Alex and Maria was fun, however (“the gay guy always dies first” *Maria’s EXCUSE ME expression* “or second. that’s fair. that look is fair” xDDD). The TVD daylight ring reference KILLED me lmao. And their conversations in the car got to me. Also LMAO at Michael, the one with super powers, getting knocked down in less than ten seconds and being completely useless xDD.

Anyway. I totally got a kick out of Kyle rejecting Isobel’s ass, even if it was for Steph of all people. THANK GOD. I was worried when I heard they flirted lol. I’m also grateful Isobel’s ONS was a white girl, because her track record with WoC is terrible. Now I just want the show to never bring up Rosa/Isobel again with this as an excuse, thanks. BTW, I hate the word “queerbaiting” and disagree with most of its uses, to be frank, but this thing with Kyle gets... headed in that direction, js, given how it’s obvious the writers are aware about fandom and its headcanons etc. And I have no dog in this fight because I have issues with all of Kyle’s ships LMFAO (except, ironically, Kyle/Michael, lmao. It’d be straightforward at the very least).

“Maybe I’m pregnant, you’re not my gynecologist” is going to be Max’s shining moment forever and ever. Paired with Liz’s worse when she says what happened with Rosa no longer matters (to her) smh. It fucking does. Resurrecting Rosa doesn’t undo the damage because Rosa’s death wasn’t the only harm done, okay? They ruined and shat all over her memory, they made Arturo and Liz a target, they contributed to a racist af climate that endangered people beyond the Ortechos. The LEAST Rosa deserves is an apology; and a real one, not Isobel’s “I do this to feel better and get something out of you, but I’ll violently hit you and invade your mind tomorrow” one. Michael clearly doesn’t give enough of a damn to even THINK that he might need to apologize. I have some hopes for Max (who would’ve thunk he’d been the pod sibling I’d feel most lenient towards a year ago. I mean, he still has moments where I cannot stand him, but still xD. I’m actually enjoying his dynamic with Rosa this last few episodes), though I hope it won’t translate on Rosa becoming all buddy-buddy with him, because nope. Not so much for the ~morals of it all, tbh, but because I think it’s better for her, narrative-wise, if Rosa remains A Skeptic.

And like I say, that’s the least they should do, after what they caused. The least. And now ROSA has brought Max back to life --their debt to her is STAGGERINGLY HIGH, AFAIC. So yeah, Liz. It still fucking matters. And I sincerely hope Rosa never lets any of them conveniently forget.

BTW, with this new mention of Liz’s ex-fiancé, and now that the show is pulling Kyle away from the triangle (at least temporarily), I fully expect Diego to make an appearance, sooner or later.

[velveetacrackncheese]

Hey, Rad... Alex... Alexlememe? I know that's the name you used to go by and I know you've kinda disconnected yourself from Viv's fanbase after ZP ended, and I remember your memes and such but I kinda just wanted to get your take on the Hazbin drama since you reblogged the headcanon blog's post on the subject. More or less regarding the issue of her being uncharitable to fans and non-fans alike, plus that one callout post on twitter?

So this is weird. I wasn’t expecting to get asks on the subject since like you said, I’ve generally been disconnected from the fanbase aside from the few reblogs here and there retaining to Hazbin and its more recent developments. But yeah I guess I could give my take on this since I mean.. old fans still follow me. Idk why, but they do!So, really. In regards to that callout post (which is now deleted) I really, really don’t care that much. For one thing, Initially I did because I really hated to see someone be slandered so viciously with inaccurate and uncharitable attacks, but I kinda just stopped because even when I linked the addresses from both Viv, and the Ken dude regarding all the drama mentioned, it was either ignored and resulting in me being called a “pedo sympathizer” or “It wasn’t even an apologyyyyy weh” and like, whatever. I stopped giving a shit.

Terms of the traced animation thing... Lol, ok. I mean homages do exist, and her animation thingy was based on a meme so whatevs.

Anyways,I knew from the very start that the whole “tracing” and “stealing designs” stuff was nonsense since there was an entire like, tumblr drama arc on the issue, and albeit Viv’s post is gone, there’s evidence of legal contracts regarding Jiji and that whole nonsense that was years ago. In regards to her drawing pictures of Blaire White and Shoe… Eh. I mean, yeah, fuck em, but she’s made it clear that she doesn’t support those views anymore, and she wasn’t even really aware of the other things they’d done at that point, and I see no real reason not to believe her because what does lying about that gain her? Yeah her comment on the “blackface” thing if you wanna call it that was dumb as shit, but considering 2016 was a rough year for her in terms of trying to find where she fell in the political sphere, I can relate because I was in the same boat. A lot of sjw cringe comps, shaming feminists, and purposely misgendering transpeople… Not a good time for me either! Course I’ve changed. I went from being a reactionary alt-centrist to an anarchist so. Whether that’s an improvement is up to you.

As for the whole pedo/zoo shit, I really don’t see it. I mean like, look, obviously porn art portraying people fucking feral animals is disgusting right. Not saying it isn’t problematic or anything, but to be fair, she did draw this shit like 8 years ago. I’ve seen worse from even more well-established artists and I don’t see people trying to cancel them? Also, the art was suggestive for one thing and not necessarily 100% porn. I mean it’s still creepy and gross, and I’d understand scolding them if they continued to do so but a lot worse, but I haven’t seen anything like that from Viv past those 2 drawings. As for the pedo shit… The relationship between a 17 year old and a 19 year old is… hardly creepy and reminiscent of pedo shit. So yeah no fuck that. Now with the drawing of Mirage and Kestrel and the tag that said something jokingly like “Mirage and her pedo tendencies” or whatever… Yeah idk, I can’t defend that lmfao. Again, Viv said she disapproves of those drawings and doesn’t care to think about them, but that one piece of artwork definitely had some baggage to it that made me feel uncomfortable after reading the tags.Only issue I took in terms of her addressing that, is that she was very adamant about it being an inside joke… Which if that’s true, you must’ve had some fucked up friends like damn.

I would also like to state that cub art is legitimately disgusting and I am of the belief that it can cause harm depending on the context since I assume the consumption of cub art can reinforce the urge for pedophiles to act on their desires instead of finding healthy coping mechanisms for it through therapy. There have been stories from younger users on the internet that older people have tried to groom them and have the notion of pedos preying on them be normalized by sending them art depicting kids in sexual acts with adults. Of course in isolation cub art isn’t as harmful as the actual act of raping a child, and I would argue that people have their priorities kind of messed up since the illustration being acknowledged should be part of combating pedophiles preying on children. However, people, typically twitter wokescolds tend to focus on the art solely and I don’t know why. There’s a lot of MAPS trying to find their way into LGBT spaces and it’s fucking gross.

Now with Hazbin itself… It’s meh. Initially I watched it with rose-tinted glasses and loved it. After watching it for like… the 3rd, 4th, 5th time? It’s alright. I don’t hate it, but it’s far from perfect. Now ofc I know it’s a pilot but a very lengthy pilot I’ll say. My biggest gripe with the pilot is that the editing is really fucking weird. Like the editing where Angel tells Alastor “I can suck yah dick!” and the scene that followed was really off. It seemed like too many cuts were made in that instance and seemed very cluttered. It also feels that way during Charlie singing “Inside Every Demon is a Rainbow” and how many little animated bits were like almost wiped off the screen by how fast it came by, and ntm there was just so much happening all at once on screen as well. I had to pause at points just to process everything that was happening. The palette is also very, very, verrrry red. There’s so much red going on and like… I get it, it’s in hell. But lemme rest my eyes on something else besides red, please. The palette they use needs to be better diversified, and the same goes for the characters too. Every character seems to have red on them. Whenever Baxter shows up later he’s gonna look really out of place. Some of the jokes were ok, and others seemed non-clever. I didn’t think Angel’s joke about sucking Al’s dick was funny. I did like the joke with Pentious and Angel though. “SON??” Some of it could’ve been written better too.

Regarding the drama with the show itself… Personally I don’t get it. Like, I don’t feel as if Angel is homophobic as a character since his queerness isn’t at the face of the jokes he makes? He just happens to be sex worker which… sex workers are fine? Support sex workers y’all, seriously. There’s also nothing intrinsically wrong with being sexually active either? As long as it’s within reason and you’re being trustworthy.The issue lies in the fact that people viewed the things I just mentioned as negative, and associate it with gay people as said negatively portrayed thing to push the sentiment of “Gay man do sex a lot therefore the gays bad” or that sort of thing. Also there’s a bit where it shows there’s more emotional depth to him and I’m hoping they’ll expand on that later. Honestly though, the criticisms in regards to that have been pretty uncharitable. Same with the criticisms for Vaggie. Apparently Vaggie is racist because… she’s loud and angry? Again, this is a case where people assume those traits are negative, and because it’s assumed to be negative, the negatively portrayed thing pushes the sentiment of “Being a loud fiery woman made, and latina women are that, therefore latina women bad” or some shit.  There are stereotypes that are bad no matter what the context is like sambo-esque caricatures of black people. Then there are tropes that are applied to certain demographics that have the capability to be written well into characters without it being offensive or disrespectful. Vaggie is literally angry because she’s protective of her gf. Like. C’mon.

So, I think that settles what I think about that? It honestly seems like superficial shit to me tbh, and I’m saying this as an sjw-y beta cuck anarchist.

The only REAL gripe I have, is with what the mod from @zpheadcanons posted. Because I know this is probably true as much as it hurts me to say it. Faust def has a history of being pretty petty and bully-like to people she deems undesirable, and Viv harbors it by not criticizing it, and if anyone else within their friend group does it then you’re scolded vehemently and treated like garbage. Her attitude also stretches to harboring an audience full of white knights that I personally don’t approve of.

There’s also this

Faust has hurt distant people I personally know and… yeah. Maybe I’m biased but I can’t vibe with that. Sorry. If you don’t make an effort to criticize abusive behavior within your own friend circles then that makes you just as bad, because then you’re just a bystander to things you could have prevented.

This isn’t to say Viv herself hasn’t dealt with bad faith actors, or people who had the intention to hurt her, or very uncharitable criticism. Particularly from the badwebcomics forums which is honestly 4chan like in how they operate. It’s vicious as hell, and a lot of their criticisms boil down to insults and personal attacks, which serve to be nonconstructive. That’s not to say Viv has been kind to even the more charitable criticism though. I know because when I happened to send an ask to the zoophobia criticism blog (where did it go???) regarding something relatively minor and superficial, she blocked me from her blog. I’m still blocked lmfao. I’m not blocked on twitter though! (not yet anyways). Faust has me blocked there though, and I have no idea why. She’s had me blocked for years even though I haven’t spoken out against her till recently. So, there’s that.

As for her apology itself, I feel like it was fine. I think it could’ve been worded better? The take I disagree with in terms of that is like… If I made a mistake in the past, and I make it clear that I don’t care for what I did, I don’t feel as if me explaining why I felt compelled to do certain things negate me from still not caring for my past actions? That’s just me providing context. That’s a really weird take, but I guess that could be viewed as an excuse idk. Personally I think people are holding the bar super high to a state of irrationality.

*sigh* So yeah there’s that. I miss the old days where honestly I could be ignorant about this, but at the same time I look at my old obsessive posts and I kinda just… cringe. I was such an irrational stan I almost hate myself for it. Fuck XD

Edit: I’d also like to point out that I’m not saying Viv or Faust are totally awful or totally good people, and I know they’re capable of being better. It’s a matter of whether or not they wanna be better.

[strange-destinations]

Dear Yuletide Writer 2019

(As usual, please ignore this if you don’t know what this is about!)

Hello, and thank you so much for writing something for me!! I adore seeing what people come up with for Yuletide and I am super excited for what you end up producing. I want this to be a good and enjoyable experience for you as a writer, so don’t try to second-guess yourself too much - just have fun making whatever it is!

Squicks/DNWS - no sex, please! (And it also follows that I’d rather like to avoid any noncon, kinky stuff even if it’s nonsexual, any other sort of sexual content, etc - that’s just not my sort of thing, really.) Romance is all right, if that’s the way that you want to take things, but I much prefer close friendships and family dynamics. However!! I am pretty much completely fine with body horror/violence, hurt/comfort, etc. 

I love good dialogue, character interaction, twist endings, and imaginative plots - and worldbuilding! Happy endings are preferred but not necessary if it just isn’t working for you.

In general - if you’re thinking about making something gay/trans/queer/ace in any way, you should probably absolutely go for it, because I’m wild for that sort of thing.

AUs are… fine and good, as far as I can think of! (Obv no A/B/O or sex-related stuff please, but) canon divergence, fantasy, high school, etc seem all good to me! Especially if there’s a whole lot of clever nods to original canon in there. 

In addition, I'm always welcome to receiving stuff in interesting and unusual mediums/styles. This includes stuff like Interactive Fiction (additional info here) and multimedia stuff.

Anyway, fandom time. Let's do this, y'all!

->

Fandom: Ruby Redfort series - Lauren Child

Available:  I managed to acquire a copy of the full series online via my local library - and the physical copies were at my local library too. I don’t have a link to them, I’m afraid.

Tvtropes page: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Literature/RubyRedfort

Characters: *** Any from *** Ruby Redfort, Hitch, Blacker, Clancy Crew 

About the fandom: I just love it a lot.  I dragged its fandom out of the depths of Tumblr singlehandedly a few years ago and have been doggedly creating content for it ever since. There's just something really compelling about 'bright young kid gets accidentally adopted by spy agency' (yes i know that's not EXACLY what happens but I can dream, right?)

Prompts/suggestions:

Like I said above, I really like the idea of Ruby being essentially adopted by the whole Spectrum team.

I’d love to see some casefic! Blacker and Ruby working together to solve a puzzle or problem - either serious or mundane - or Hitch and Ruby on a stakeout of some sort. Or both!

Some general stuff I like - heists, murder mysteries, rescue missions, characters playing games (e.g. Travelling Lemon, word games, throwing increasingly ridiculous hypotheticals at each other) because they're bored or similar,

Spectrum office shenanigans - stuff that happens between books, when Ruby and everybody else aren’t in mortal danger and that LB will most likely glare disapprovingly at.

On the angstier side of things, if you want to stick Ruby in even more mortal danger than usual I am ALL RIGHT WITH THAT. Rescue missions hell yeah.

AUs??? AUs!!! Modern!AU with Ruby doing extreme sports vlogs and occasionally failing to hide the fact that she's part of a secret spy agency. Is Blacker a hacker? Or a fantasy/medieval AU? Or Ruby Redfort, in space!

I feel like I’ll be delighted with whatever you create, tbh. I can’t think of many ways you could go wrong with it.

->

Fandom: Bernice Summerfield (Big Finish Audio)

Available:  Via the Big Finish website, and all of the boxsets from Epoch to New Frontiers are available for free on Spotify! Just look up Bernice Summerfield there.

Tvtropes page: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Franchise/BerniceSummerfield

Characters: *** Any from *** Bernice Summerfield, Third Doctor (Warner)

About the fandom: It’s like if Indiana Jones was shorter, actually did his job, and was a kickass woman who was also the Doctor’s companion at one point! Several points. And also she has a considerably larger family than Indiana Jones. Her spinoff kind of transcends a lot of forms of media - she’s in comics, print, animations, audio dramas, and one really hilariously terrible sort-of-fanfilm made by Lisa Bowerman and Sylvester McCoy when they were on some kind of cruise together. And it more or less transcends genre too. There’s been musical episodes right alongside the episode where someone very dear to her manipulates someone else very dear to her into killing (you guessed it) someone who is also very dear to her. It’s a wild ride. Anyway.

Prompts/suggestions:

The Warner!Doctor and Benny era of this series particularly delights me, because Benny and the Doctor just have such a lovely dynamic. There's a bit in the writer's guide for this era that mentions that the Warner!Doctor 'seems to be a grouch' but is actually 'a playful spirit who loves to have fun', and... I just love that? And there is literally no fic with them! Which is an absolute travesty.

I particularly like: heists, murder mysteries, rescue missions, adventures, playing around with genre and style.

It's Doctor Who/Bernice Summerfield!! Which means there's an infinite wealth of planets and times and worlds to explore, if you choose to set it in the regular universe. If, on the other hand, you choose to place it in the Unbound universe, slowly collapsing in on itself, there's probably a lot you can do with this too

The found family dynamic between them!! It's clear that, despite all the snarking and sniping, they really do adore each other quite a bit. If you'd lean into that, I'd be forever grateful.

Apologies for no real specific suggestions - mostly, I just would really like to see these two having fun together and being buds. But also? The angst is good too. Make me laugh/smile or make me hurt, I don't care which.

 ->

Fandom: Beanworld - Larry Marder

Available:  ...I have literally no idea where you can pick this up. I first read it at my local library. I think you can get copies at various book retailers?

Tvtropes page: Non-existent. I should rectify that.

Characters: *** Any from *** Professor Garbanzo, Mr Spook, Beanish, Heyoka (but honestly please throw in everybody in there. I love them all so much)

About the fandom: It's a weird, brilliant, complete unique experience of a comic book set in a world where the rules are very different to ours!

Prompts/suggestions:

I know that pretty much the entire point of Beanworld is that the characters are not human in the least, But I can't help but wonder what a human AU would be like!! Beanish as a struggling art student, the Hoi'Polloi as the local street gang with an unfortunate gambling habit, Heyoka as the weird chaotic neutral genderqueer acrobat who babysits occasionally and is always standing on their head. Or any other direction you want to take it in!! I adore seeing familiar characters in settings that they couldn't possibly find themselves in, in canon.

Bean shenanigans!! What sort of things do they get up to on their Goof-Off Days that we don't see on-screen?

Explore some of the friendships/relationships between the characters! I love some of those good good Bean interactions. For example (but not at all limited to):

Professor Garbanzo and Mr Spook - the ultimate BroTP. I particularly love how well they get along even when you wouldn’t expect them too - how Mr Spook isn’t really a scientific sort of guy but is really encouraging and helpful to her endeavors. It’s good and soft.

Mr Spook and the Chow Sol’jers! A dedicated fighting team that work together and protect each other every day. I’m now wondering what the Chow Sol’jer in-jokes are. They’ve gotta have some, right?

Beanish and Dreamishness - the greatest love story ever told! (If you do end up including this relationship in particular, I’d prefer it if it wasn’t the focus.) Additionally, I’d really love it if you could play around with the idea of love in the Big•Big•Picture being different to how we see it/perceive it in our world! I know it’s kind of vague, and it’s definitely not necessary, but I figured I might as well put it out there.

Heyoka and... everyone. Literally everyone. I love how she interacts with the Beans - how they’re kind of confused as to how she works, but accept her as one of them anyway - and how she interacts with people outside of the Beanworld. The sequence when she’s falling upwards and through the Inspiration Constellation, and how the Constellation is so pleasantly amused by and encouraging of her - it’s really nice. And her as the teacher to the Pod’ll’pool babies!! She’s such a cool character.

Other AUs or canon divergences! Can't think of anything specific off the top of my head, but I'm sure there's some stuff out there.

Literally anything that takes stuff from canon and extends upon it! Especially if you’re playing into the amazingly bizarre and extensive world of the Big•Big•Picture. Because the rules there are definitely not at all the same as they are for our world, and that delights me to no end. I have so many questions about it that I’m nearly certain aren’t going to be answered anytime soon. Like, where does the Thin Lake/Four Realities/Hoi-Polloi zone end?? There’s gotta be an end to it somewhere. Are there other islands like the Beanworld? 

->

Fandom: Rainbow Magic series - Daisy Meadows

Available: on your younger sister's bookshelf or at pretty much any library, bookstore or garage sale you'd care to visit.

Tvtropes page: 

Characters: *** Any from *** Rachel Walker, Kirsty Tate, Titania, Oberon (but feel free to throw in any of the million-plus other fairies that exist at your discretion)

About the fandom: Oh, jeez. What to say about this? It's such a bizarre interest of mine. The series has suffered from intense seasonal rot, with literally every book following the same formula. And there are hundreds of books. But it's such a large part of my childhood that it's hard to not feel some sort of affection for it. Plus, there's so many interesting things to explore!

Prompts/suggestions:

Feel free to throw some Kirsty/Rachel shipping in there, because we all know those two were lesbian as all hell. I'd prefer it not to be the focus, though!

Any exploration of the fact that the girls have been doing this for far longer than is strictly reasonable with no complaints, questions, or problems. They've been through like ten Christmas specials and don't appear to have aged a day since the beginning of the series. What's up with that, huh?

To that end - there's plenty of myths and legends about the rules that fae traditionally have. What about applying some of these to the RM fairies? Are Titania and Oberon the leaders of the Seelie Court, with Jack Frost as the Unseelie leader? Do they do the whole Changeling thing? Are Kirsty and Rachel Changelings?

(And bear with me for a second while I point you at a specific line from the very first book, because I think it's very good inspiration for the whole 'giving a fairy your name' thing:)

Kirsty wanted to ask the fairy so many things. But she didn't know where to start.

"Tell me your names, quickly," said the fairy. She fluttered up into the air again. "There's so much to be done, and we must get started right away."

Rachel wondered what the fairy meant. "I'm Rachel," she said.

"And I'm Kirsty," said Kirsty. "But who are you?"

"I'm the Red Rainbow Fairy - but you can call me Ruby," the fairy replied.

Very suspicious.

A Discord server I'm on has been throwing around the idea of the fairies (yes. All of them.) ending up as humans in the human world abruptly, and having to adjust to living life without magic - and dealing with the fact that somehow, their magical domains are functioning perfectly without them. Which is a very compelling idea. How do Rachel and Kirsty deal with their now-possibly-permanent, no-longer-magical neighbours? How are Titania and Oberon coping, now that they no longer have to rule a whole kingdom? What sort of the things do the fairies get up to? Where do they stay?

Aged-up Kirsty and Rachel get called upon to deal with new adult problems that are blooming in the fairy world. (Tiara The Tax Evasion Fairy, anyone?)

...or anything else.

->

Again, thank you for writing for me, and I hope you get something awesome in return from your own writer! Good luck!

[sol1056]

no story is ever the same

so, I got this comment on my post about writing outside yourself:

The story doesn't suck at all. Are we even watching the same story unfold? Because of or in spite of it, the characters have come out stronger and better for all they have gone through. And I seriously doubt very much that you could do better. They have already exceeded my expectations with this show. You, and your attempt at explanations of why it's bad..... Tell me thst you can't do as good as or better than what they have.

Normally I’d just shrug, 'cause your type is in every fandom, always so threatened by the least sign of dissent. But I’ve now gotten severals anxious asks and DMs, wanting to know my response. 

Might as well dash off a few words.       

First, was this meta chosen at random as a place to drop a complaint? The topic isn’t quality, it’s a writer’s willingness to question their assumptions. Libraries are full of much-loved, beautifully-crafted, near-transcendent stories full of harmful tropes. Any story can fall prey; it takes work to interrogate the status quo. 

I can forgive writers who trip over trope landmines, but JDS made clear he and LM knew exactly where the landmines lay. They decided their intentions would protect them, and their story was more important. I have nothing but contempt for that level of arrogance.

And when my inbox triples in size overnight, filled with younger members of my community shocked and hurt that a story betrayed them? My contempt turns to fury, and I have a right to speak that fury and give it a name. If you've got a problem with that reaction, that’s your problem, not mine.  

Second, if the story had no redeeming value, I wouldn’t write meta for it. An analytical approach will never be the dominant mode in any fandom, thus my primary audience is always myself. If I’m not enjoying the story on any level, I have no reason to bother going further.

Of course, some people just want to eat the pie, and I get that. But that’s why I keep saying: you have to curate your own experience. If you don’t want to be at the table with those of us deconstructing the pie, no one’s duct-taped you to that chair. Perhaps it’s time you consider sitting somewhere else. If you'd rather stay and simmer in resentment, that’s on you.

Third, I not only could do better, I have. But I’ve also been writing long enough to be able to say that I’ve also done much worse. Storytelling isn’t something you’re born with; it’s not encoded in your DNA like brown eyes or long legs. It’s an art like any other, and it takes work and practice. That means you learn from your mistakes... and sometimes you learn from others’ mistakes, too.

If you can’t take feedback, if you reject all critique on its face, then you’re not going to learn at all. Your skills will never improve. But if you only passively accept critique, you're depriving yourself of the other half of the equation: learning to give critique. It’s the best way to train yourself to see knots, so you can turn that on your own stories to fix knots before they become thickets.

Clearly this process is somehow threatening your enjoyment of the story. I empathize, but I do not sympathize.   

Beyond that, the elitism hiding in “you can't do as good” is utterly repugnant. As if you’re only allowed to say the pie is burnt if you're a trained chef? Bullshit. The non-cook doesn’t need to know how to fix (or prevent) a burnt pie or what causes burnt pies. A critique doesn’t require a diagnosis of the error or a prescription for the cure. A critique need only say: this story doesn’t work for me and here’s why. Spoken from an authentic place, these words are valid.

Storytelling is not only not elitist, it’s damn near the antithesis. If there is any universal trait among all humans across the speck of time we’ve existed, it’s our love of stories. In a way, we’re all out here making and eating pie, every day, and you are not the sole arbiter of how or when or why. 

If it bothers you when people find their joy in ways that aren’t yours, again, that’s entirely on you.

Fourth and most importantly: a story does not exist objectively in some perfect state. Story exists through experience. We read and see and re-tell different stories even when we speak from the same source. This is the nature of story.

To make sure you didn’t miss that: story exists through experience.

For all that we writers call ourselves creator-gods, the story is never entirely our own. Once it’s heard, read, seen, consumed by another, the story comes to life in that space between speaker and listener. Humans understand stories by experiencing them, and in doing so, we make them our own. This is the playground and wellspring of fandom, too. We may not be part-owners de jure, but in our interaction with the story, we become part-creators de facto.  

Each of us brings our beliefs, our fears and hopes, everything we’ve known and loved and lost. For the adult who grew up in an abusive home, one character’s arc will be riveting above all else; for the reader with a broken heart, the opening loss is too bittersweet to swallow more. For the brown girl who dreams of being a hero, her desire will become the lens through which she views the entire story. For the queer kid desperate to see a version of themselves come through the darkness intact, one character’s victory will become paramount.

Who we are is woven through our experience of the story, and in turn, a story can influence our future experiences. That is why an ethical author would be wise to tread lightly, because that is the power of stories: to potentially change the trajectory of someone’s life.

So, this is not for the commenter, but for everyone else reading. Just so we’re all clear on where I stand.

You are one-half of every story you experience, and thus you always have the right to speak truth to the story’s power.

You do not need to crawl across broken glass or write a million words to prove yourself qualified, or to satisfy some pedantic criteria. You are never a fake fan for seeing the story through your own eyes. You owe no apology nor justification for how a story makes you feel.

And you are always within your right to take back a story that has hurt you, and reshape it until it can heal you, instead.