#I’m just achey. fatigued. and tired. all around drained.

[dadbots]

ughhhh….ahh…

[bradsmindbrain]

So... Ted giving Jack belly rubs and Jack losing it, huh? Details please for the prompts.

Canine

Summary: Jack’s tired after a particularly draining hunt, luckily his husband is there to help him.

TW: None

Jack laid on his back, sprawled across his sofa, a frown on his face. Nothing had happened today, well, at least not directly, he just felt tired, like he couldn’t bear to do anything. Perhaps it had something to do with the hunt he had just gotten back from, the injuries he sustained mixed with the jet-lag. That was probably it. Plus, from what he had heard in the news, his last hunt was particularly long, so it was likely that the fatigue had yet to leave his body. Honestly, it was just nice to be home, even as exhausted as he was.

He heard Ted shuffling around in the kitchen, presumably making him something to help him feel better. Honestly, he was thankful his husband was helping him like this, it was nice to be treated like something fragile on occasion, to be taken care of. Whatever Ted was making smelled good, probably some coffee if he had to guess. In some ways he found it odd how his curse worked, he couldn’t have chocolate, but he could have coffee just fine, despite also containing the chemical in chocolate that made him sick. Then again, it was magic, so he supposed it could work in whatever way it needed to.

A few minutes later, Ted entered the room holding the sunflower mug. He looked at him, obvious concern in those beautiful crimson eyes he could get lost in for hours. He sat up to grab the mug as his husband handed it to him, “Gracias, Ted.” He gave a smile as he took a sip of the coffee, plenty of creamer, Ted knew him so well.

Once he had finished the coffee, he was feeling much better, well, mentally anyway. He placed the mug on the coffee table as his husband gave an inquisitive growl.

He grinned at his husband, “Yeah, I’m feeling a bit better, but I’m still pretty achey.”

Ted gave a grumble in response.

He gave his husband a confused look, “Huh?”

Ted grumbled again.

“Alright, if you say so,” he did as his husband asked, lying back down on the sofa like he had before.

Slowly, Ted crouched down beside him, giving an affectionate growl.

He looked at his husband, “What are you-”

He cut himself off with a happy whine as he felt his husband’s hand slip under his patterned cardigan shirt and began rubbing his belly. 

Jack was well-aware of the canine-like mannerisms his curse brought on, and of course, a weakness for belly rubs was one of them. All it took was some simple rubs and scratches on his stomach to make him completely lose control of himself. He gave happy whines as his husband kneaded his stomach, arching his back as he did so. It felt so good, the soft touches sending pleasure throughout his body as his husband growled affectionately. His husband just kept rubbing and kneading his soft stomach as he thrashed his limbs from the overwhelming stimulation he was receiving, giving affectionate, giddy whines and giggles the whole time. It felt so, so nice to feel his husband’s soft, viney hands pressed against his skin.

It went on for what felt like hours, but in reality was probably only a few minutes. Eventually though, Ted slid his hand back out from under his shirt, giving a curious grumble.

He smiled, while the rubs had done nothing to stop the ache, the sheer pleasure of it certainly drowned it out, at least for the time being anyway, and that was better than nothing. Besides, he loved it when his husband did that, making him feel good, showing him that he loved him, animal instincts and all. “Yeah, that was nice.”

Ted gave an affectionate grumble.

He grinned, “Yes, mi amor, thank you for that.”

[zevlors-tail]

Home For The Holidays

A/N: Cheesy title, I know. I wanted to write something sweet for my fav comfort character for the holidays. Shinsou and reader are in a platonic relationship in this. “I love you” is said but again, it’s all platonic. Unless of course you would like to read it as otherwise. Enjoy!

Pairing: Shinsou x Reader (Platonic), Roommate/Modern AU

Summary: Holidays are stressful, and you just need a break. 

TW: None. :)

***

Drained. Tired. Exhausted. None of those words can even begin to describe how you feel right now. After two long days of lengthy driving and barely getting any sleep, you’re ready to collapse into your bed as soon you open your apartment door- or you would be, except your mind doesn’t seem to agree with your body. Physically, you want nothing more than to flop face first into your pillow and be done for the night. Mentally…not so much. Your brain just won’t quit, just won’t give up on trying to render you helpless. It won’t shut off, memories of the last two days replaying and continuing to stress you out even when it’s all over already. The holiday is essentially done, all of your goodies stuffed away in the back of your car still (you were too tired to even think about bringing most of them inside for the night), and you don’t have to see any more family. In fact, you cut your stay short and left early, and you sure as hell don’t have any plans to go back there any time soon. But after all is said and done, after you sink down on the couch beside your roommate, you still aren’t able to find enough peace of mind to rest or go to sleep.

Hitoshi shifts to make more room for you on the couch, and you gratefully curl up in the opposite corner from him and stretch out your legs a little. They ache from being cramped up in your car for hours on end. A comfortable silence settles between the two of you for a while, broken only by the sound of metal scraping against…porcelain? You look over to see Shinsou with a bowl of what looks like Kraft mac n’ cheese in his hands, eyes fixed on the TV while he absentmindedly shoves forkfuls of it in his mouth. Suddenly you feel extra tired and hungry, and you can’t help but remember that the last time you ate was this afternoon while you stare longingly at the bowl. If your car clock is correct, then you got back sometime around midnight; that’s at least a full eight hours or so since you’ve last had food. It’s not that you hadn’t been hungry at the time, but you were in such a hurry to pack everything up and make sure you didn’t forget anything before the drive home that you’d forgotten to have something for dinner. And if you're being honest with yourself…you might have been in a rush to leave after the events that transpired. Regardless, you're currently starving, but you lack the energy right now to get up and make something for yourself.

“Want some?” Shinsou shuffles around in his blanket so that his back is resting against the couch while he’s facing you, one hand outstretched to offer the bowl of macaroni and cheese to you. There’s still steam coming from it; it’s still hot and it smells heavenly. “I don’t mind, I was pretty much done anyway.” He must have caught you staring.

As much as you want to say no, your stomach growls loudly before you can even open your mouth, and Hitoshi is all but shoving the bowl into your hands before he moves closer to you and throws half of his blanket over your shoulders to share that too. He’s always so kind to you.

“But you’ve barely even touched it,” you reply flatly. It feels like all of your energy has been sapped. Even talking is taking a toll on you, but still your mind is awake.

“I was just bored. I ate dinner an hour ago.” When he sees you hesitating still, he gives you a thoughtful look and asks, “Would it make you feel better if I shared it with you?”

“Yeah...” It’s an honest answer. Even if he really did have dinner an hour ago, you still feel a little guilty about taking his food. At least this way he can have some too.

Shinsou takes a bite for every five that you take. You’re pretty sure he’s only eating for your sake, but you don’t mind that. You pass the fork back and forth between each other, his warmth at your side a welcome feeling after braving the bitter cold during the short walk to your shared apartment earlier. At some point you realize the utensil never left your hand after he passed it back to you however, and before long the bowl is empty.

“I thought you weren’t supposed to be home until Tuesday,” he prods gently. His eyes roam over your face for the signs he knows so well by now.

“I wasn’t.”

You choose not to elaborate, and he accepts your silence for a valid answer. He’s good at reading between the lines and recognizing cues. It’s what you don’t say, rather than your actual response, that tells him you’ve had a rough time while you were away. The bags under your eyes, much heavier than usual as of late, tell him the same.

As far as you know, Hitoshi doesn’t visit his parents around this time of year. While you went to stay with some of your family, he’d chosen to stay home instead, and you had no qualms with it since it meant you wouldn’t need a house sitter for your numerous plants around the apartment. Now, you’re especially glad he doesn’t go anywhere during the holidays; you really don’t want to be alone right now. After having food and warming up, you feel absolutely beat. You’re achey, weary, beyond fatigued, and finally ready to relax your brain and go to sleep- and Hitoshi’s warm arms seem like the perfect place to do so. You lean into him, eyes already closing in defeat.

He sets the bowl on the coffee table before maneuvering the two of you around so that you’re lying on top of him, head resting just under his chin and his arms wrapped securely around your form. Over time, you've decided there’s no safer place than the lavender-haired man beneath you. Nothing brings you more solace than the strong beat in his chest and the warmth he radiates under the blanket, than his soft gaze that’s so full of care and his genuine smiles that you adore. There are no expectations to meet here, no standards to be held to, no facade to keep up. It’s just the two of you as you are- nothing more, and nothing less. You know Hitoshi will never judge you for anything, will never try to make you be someone you’re not. You can rest easy knowing you’re at home in his embrace.

“Hey…Toshi?” you breathe, your voice barely above a whisper. He makes a soft hum in acknowledgement and runs a hand lightly over your upper back, a motion that soothes some of your aches and relaxes you further. “Can you play with my hair?”

He chuckles softly but runs a hand through some of your loose strands, none the less. You lean into his tender touch, his fingertips gently massaging against your scalp as he does so. His touch feels nice; it melts away the stress of the past two days and eases your mind into a more relaxed state- one where you’re not constantly on overdrive with your thoughts and memories. Things finally slow down, and you start to drift off.

The blanket keeps the both of you warm as you cuddle each other, old reruns of a show you vaguely recognize playing on TV in the background. It’s the only source of light in the apartment- that is, until Hitoshi reaches over for the remote and turns it off for the night. After that, it’s completely quiet. The only sound you can hear is the strong beat of his heart in his chest and his hand running through your hair still. Both of your eyes are closed for the night, and you’re not moving any time soon.

“I’m glad you’re back home,” he whispers against you. “Love you.”

“Love you too.” It’s so quiet you’re almost unsure if you say it out loud, but the way Hitoshi snuggles up closer to you says otherwise.

All those places you visit over the holidays? All the family you interact with? It’s hard to call those home sometimes. But this? Right here?

Hitoshi Shinsou is a home if you’ve ever seen one.

[thebestworstidea]

I

I wish that starting things wasn’t so difficult. But starting in the middle is so painful. Let me give it a try.

The thing is that not only do I have to deal with Chronic Fatigue syndrome, but also it’s conjoined twin, depression. either can sap the life from me, draining away all energy and strength, and leaving me leaning against the dining room table about to cry because a t shirt feels heavy, and sorting the laundry is only the first step of what I need to do. you know the worst part?

I’m lucky. 

I can get out of bed. I can ignore my pain most of the time. Sitting up is only sometimes a problem (or maybe I got better at coping with it, with my high backed chair)  I’m really stubborn.  I can usually get something done. The knowledge that it could be worse is only sometimes helpful. I don’t know why I”m talking about this now I’m just so tired and achey, and I can’t do what I want to do and I can’t do what I should do and I’m just so tired and frustrated and done and I’m worried formyself, but at the same time I just... I don’t care. I’m too tired. I want to do things but I can’t because I’m tired and it’s wearing so why should I bother to want things that I can’t have or do. Let it go. Just accept that life is stunted and dull and gross and that’s all there is. 

I’m here I matter, I’m cool. but it doesn’t feel like it. At all. I’m so tired and worthless. I can’t help other people, I can’t help myself, I can barely stumble around.  what good does it do to dwell on the things I want to do when I can’t do them. But thensometimes I do and it’s just ... hey. 

I’m so tired. I want to cry and never wake up again. I want  someone to notice me to care to pay attention and be intrested in what I haveto say but even if someone did I wouldn’t be able to take it and that’s terrible

I just wanted to get a project I’ve been planning for six months done without feling guilty that I’m not washing the dishes, but when I tryto wash the dishes the water comes out so hot that my hands hurt and I cry, and the dishes are heavy let alone the pots. but it’s not my mothers responcibilty to wash all the dishes. I’m trying I’m trying so hard and it doesn’t seem to matter. I can’t talk I can’t think and I don’t know what to do.

Then people say stuff like ‘oh just relax’ or ‘take a break’ and I’m like THE FUCK. Do things magicly get done when you take a break? Is there something I’m missing that you don’t have MORE work to do after you take a break because you left it behind? 

I’m angry and I’m tired and I’m sad and my chest hurts and I”m scared and I don’t know what to do and it makes me more tired.