#I’m imagining them being separated by prison bars

[whump-galaxy]

“Will you look me in the eyes? Please?”

“…I can’t.”

“Please, I know what you think of me. You don’t have to forgive me, just please look at me. Hear me.”

“I can’t. After you left, I tried to protect you. I kept my mouth shut and they took my eyes for it. There’s nothing left for me to see. Not of you at least.”

[simplydannie]

[About "Unknowing"]

If Mount Rageons were trolls, I imagine Floyd would be in chains and confined to a prison cell instead of being trapped in a diamond prison.

Can you imagine Floyd, who is chained by his ankles and wrists, hugging troll!Veneer?

I wanted to make this a drawing but drawing Trolls is difficult for me!! It wasn’t turning out how I imagined it, I kinda got discouraged. I am envious of people who can draw Trolls so well 🥺I did my variation of the twins as Trolls here to give new readers some sort of idea. I will have to end up writing this instead. I’m so sorry! 😞:

Original story here!

Floyd pulled and pulled on the shackles on his ankles and wrists.

“Come on. Come on.” He said hoping he could slip out…but no luck, nothing. For months he had been confined to this cell. It was fancy, he had to give them that. White polished marble, diamond seats and a table…but it was still a prison. Instead of bars, a clear tempered glass separated him from his freedom.

“Hello! Hello! I’m getting a little thirsty now!” Floyd called out, hoping the echo of his voice would reach someone’s ears….it didn’t. The Troll sat down and leaned against the marble wall. He leaned his head back as thoughts filled his head. How did it come to this? How did he go about letting himself get trapped? His mind then wondered to the twins. Floyd knew they were being treated poorly, he knew they were facing abuse everyday, yet, there was nothing he could do. And when he was able to do something, what did he do? Accuse them. Nearly run away and betray them. That’s how he ended up here. Even if he could magically escape he felt the twins wouldn’t trust him, he felt they wouldn’t leave with him if they had opportunity…and he didn’t blame them. Floyd was a bad brother, a bad person overall. He had abandoned his baby brother all those years ago. Who knew if he was still even alive. Now to add to his record, he was going to abandon the young twin Trolls, all because of his stupidity. Tears began streaming down his face, he hugged his knees, allowing the weariness and sadness to lull him to sleep…

…He didn’t know how late it was when he heard the soft sobs. Floyd opened his eyes slowly to see that darkness loomed over the prison ward, the only thing that illuminated everything was the lights shining in from the outside world of Rageous. He continued to hear the sobs, the little cries and whimpers. Adjusting himself, he peeked to see a small figure huddled near the prison cell hugging his knees. He knew the pale skin, the green tuft hair swooping up. What intrigued him most about Rageon Trolls was their pale skin. He was used to the vibrant colors his kind would give off…but these Trolls were different…Floyd peeked closer to the small figure…

“Veneer?”

The young Trolls shoulders shook as he cried, he hugging his knees tightly…his tiny purple beanie was on.

“Ven? What happened? Ven look at me.” Floyd called out. The young Troll turned to face Floyd…that’s when he saw the scratches along his face. A deep gash extending from his eye down to his lip, “Oh Ven…. What….What is she doing to you?….Ven?”

…The sounds of the outside world were nothing but murmurs and muffles. The only voices Veneer could hear were hers….the Mistress. She was screaming at him, telling him a he amounted to nothing, accusing him of wanted to steal his sister’s spotlight. But he didn’t, if he over stepped her, he didn’t mean too. He was asleep in his room when he awoke, when he decided to follow his feet, unknowing where they would take him…and then…he found himself here: in the prison cell ward. The adult Troll was asleep when he walked in; that’s when Veneer decided to sit down with his back against the glass. Why did he come here? Why was there something familiar about the Troll? Veneer turned his small head to look at him again….as he did….Memories began to fill his mind….The Troll had a name….

“Floyd….” Veneer murmured. That was his name, his name was Floyd…He had taken care of him and his sister for a while. He was a father to them when no one else was, “…Floyd…” Tears began streaming down his face again, his shoulders beginning to shake as the soft sobs escaped him. Veneer hugged himself tight hoping that some comfort would come from it…but it didn’t, he continued to feel cold and alone…That’s when he heard his name…

“…..Ven?” He turned around to face Floyd, seeing the look of horror on his face when he got a good look at Veneer… the scars that Mistress had left him. “…..What is she doing to you?…..”

It was as if Veneer was in a trance. He could hear Floyd talking to him, but he couldn’t answer, he couldn’t even move. Floyd unconsciously stood up and walked over to the tempered glass doors but was stopped as the force of his chains pulling him back. He looked down at his ankles and wrists… Great, I can’t even go comfort him, he sighed in aggravation. Floyd stole a glance at Veneer who continues to sit there staring at him. His big blue eyes blinking the tears away.

“….I’m sorry….” Floyd said as he turned his back to the glass door. It hurt him to see the young Troll like this. It hurt him more that there was nothing he could do about it…

…..Silence…..

Suddenly…he felt tiny arms wrap around him. Floyd jolted in surprise, but he recognized the tiny hands, he recognized the warmth of the hug. He turned to be face to face with the green tuft of swooped hair. Veneer held on tight to Floyd, the tears returning, his body shaking again in a sob. He had opened the prison cell doors and came in…He didn’t care if he were to get caught, he just needed someone…he needed that comfort…he needed his…his dad.

Floyd returned Veneer’s embrace, his shackled wrist carefully wrapping around the young Troll at first…then tighter. Floyd didn’t realize how much he had missed this until he had Veneer in his arms again. He took one hand and stroked the boys head as he slowly rocked him back and forth…

“I’m here, bud. I’m here for you. Always.” Floyd said to him. Tears began to escape his own eyes as he held Veneer there in the prison cell. He didn’t want to be the first to let go…he didn’t know when he’d get this opportunity again. He felt Veneer let out a sigh of relief as his body began to calm. One day, we’re all getting out of here, you’ll see, Floyd thought amongst himself…He hadn’t noticed, but he saw color beginning to return to his body.

[fruitynancywheeler]

Title: All I Wanted Rating: E Pairing: Caitlyn/Vi Words: 3,128 Summary: As Caitlyn descended down the halls of Stillwater to meet with the prisoner who caused her only lead to have their jaw wired shut, she didn’t really know what to expect. She imagined a myriad of burly, lumbering men to be the ones pounding against the concrete wall, but the last thing she expected was to see the first and only person she has ever loved.

AU in which Caitlyn and Vi knew each other before everything went down with Silco. Caitlyn, under the assumption Vi died in the explosion, works tirelessly to end the corruption that Piltover inflicts on the Undercity in honor of her lost love.

Violet’s last punch landed on the wall, her body going rigid at the sound of her name. She stood there sucking in deep, haggard breaths, sweat dripping down her body from the exertion of her workout. Caitlyn watched her like a hawk, not believing that Vi was actually in front of her. Seven years hadn’t changed the way her heart still fluttered in her chest at the sight of the woman she loved so deeply. She noticed the pink-haired woman squeeze her eyes tightly shut, shaking her head and muttering something under her breath that Cait couldn’t quite hear.

“You’re not real, go away,” Vi growled louder, taking Caitlyn aback with the hostility in her tone.

“W-what?” Cait stammered, wanting so badly to reach out for her love but uncertain of the reaction she’d receive if she tried.

“You’re not real!” Vi shouted now, moving swiftly towards the bars that separated them to glare at Caitlyn. Her bloody hands gripped the bars, and her face pressed in between them. “You’re just in my head, a ghost. You’re not really here.”

Even though her eyes hadn’t left Vi for a single moment, only now did Cait finally see Violet fully. She noticed the dark circles under her eyes and the pain that was written all over her face, and seeing Vi like this had her heart splitting in two. Vi had been in this horrible place the entire time, all alone, dealing with God knows what.

As if on autopilot, Caitlyn placed her notebook on the floor and stepped over the red line, the urge to reach out, to feel Vi again to prove to herself and to Vi that this was actually real, overpowering the fear of being rejected. She slowly lifted her arm out toward the bars, gauging Violet’s reaction to Cait intruding on her personal space. Vi flinched but made no effort to pull away, so Cait slid her hand between the bar and placed it against the woman’s chest, feeling the rapidly beating heart beneath her fingertips like she had all those years ago when they first kissed. With her other hand, she took one of Vi’s, prying it away from the bars to place it against her own thundering heart.

“It’s me, darling,” Cait whispered, feeling as if she spoke too loudly, it would cause Vi to pull away from her. She couldn’t stop the tears brimming in her eyes even if she tried; the years of pain she had felt hit her like a freight train as she gazed upon the woman she thought she had lost. Her own inner turmoil probably did not even come close to what Vi had dealt with being trapped in this dreaded place.

“I’m really here. With you.”

She watched as Vi’s eyes scanned her from head to toe as if trying to process that what she was seeing wasn’t a figment of her imagination. Cait squeezed Vi’s hand that was still resting atop her chest, hoping to convey that this wasn’t a dream.

Suddenly, the hand that Caitlyn had cradled gently against her was wrenched away. Vi put distance between them, a look of betrayal and anger on her face. The delicate features Cait knew and loved were now stone cold as Vi glared at her.

“You’re one of them,” Vi snarled, her fists clenched at her sides and shoulders hunched like a wild animal, trapped but ready to defend itself from a predator.

“Violet, let me explain. It’s not what it looks like!” Cait tried to reach out again– to get Vi to understand what she’s missed, being locked in here for the last seven years, but the woman she loved took another step back.

“Not what it looks like? How can you walk in here dressed like that and tell me, ‘it’s not what it looks like’?” Vi chuckled bitterly, her voice cracked and sounded slightly hysteric. Her eyes were like daggers cutting into Cait’s heart, but they were so hollow. It was as if all the life that once sparkled in those grey eyes had been completely snuffed out. “Do me a favor and stay the hell away from me, Cupcake.”

The nickname that had once been a fond memory of Caitlyn’s felt like a slap in the face, but she wasn’t ready to give up so quickly. She knew that Vi had to have an extreme amount of trauma to deal with from what had happened all those years ago, and adding whatever horrors she’d had to suffer through here in Stillwater wouldn’t be going to make that any easier. There was also Powder, Silco, and all this madness in the Undercity that Caitlyn knew Vi would dive into as soon as she learned about it because that’s just who Vi was. And Cait would be damned if she let the love of her life go through all of this alone, whether she wanted Cait there for her or not.

“I’m going to get you out of here,” Caitlyn said determinedly, ignoring the anger radiating from the other woman. “I’m going to get you out, and I just ask that you please let me explain myself, and if afterward, you still want me gone, then I will respect that.”

She held Vi’s gaze, trying to see beyond the walls that Vi had constructed to try to find her Violet still in there somewhere. All she needed was a little crack in the impenetrable stone, and she could wriggle herself in and pull Vi back to her, breaking down the fortress that had been constructed within the seven years of complete isolation. Caitlyn waited for any type of reaction, and when she’d almost started to give up, she saw an almost imperceptible nod. If she hadn’t been looking so closely, she would have missed it.

“I will be back, I promise you,” Cait said before gathering her things and quickly making her way toward the elevator. She already had a plan set in motion in her head, and it may get her into some trouble, but quite frankly, she didn’t give a damn. The only thing that mattered to her at that moment was getting Vi out of this awful place.

Once she was back on the boat heading into Piltover, her adrenaline wore off, and tears finally started to fall. The pain of knowing that the love of her life had been alive all this time, and she hadn’t had a clue about it, made her feel like her heart was shattering all over again. All the time that they had lost that could have possibly been avoided if she had just stayed all those years ago instead of returning home made her want to scream. She was grateful for the rushing water to drown out the sounds of her sobs so as not to alert the man steering the boat. When they reached shore, she wiped her tear-stained cheeks and quickly made her way home. Cait arranged another boat to bring her back within the hour, not wanting Vi to be in there any longer than she had to.

As she entered her house, she made a quick stop at her mother’s office before heading to her own room, glad that it was late and her parents were already in bed for the night. She’d been in here enough times over the years to know where her mother kept her important paperwork, easily finding the inmate release forms in the top left drawer of the desk. She grabbed a pen and quickly filled out the form, forging Jayce’s signature at the bottom. There was a chance this wouldn’t work, but the Warden hadn’t seemed to care enough to look into the fact that she wasn’t actually an enforcer anymore, so she hoped that he wouldn’t dig deeper now that she was requesting the release of an inmate. All she knew was that Violet was worth the risk of getting caught.

A couple of hours and a very unpleasant chat with the Warden that left her feeling sick to her stomach and anger boiling in her veins later, she was unlocking the cell that had caged Vi for the last seven years. When their eyes locked, it knocked all the air out of Caitlyn’s lungs, seeing that small spark of life in those grey orbs again. It was just for a short moment, but it was enough to give Cait hope that this could work, that they could work.

“What’s happening?” Vi asked, seemingly not believing that Cait had actually pulled this little stunt off.

“I told you I’d get you out of here,” Cait simply said, holding their eye contact so Vi would understand that this was really happening. It wasn’t some twisted joke being played on her. “Come on, before they start getting suspicious.”

“Why would they get suspicious of another enforcer?”

“I told you I’ll tell you everything, but not here. It’s not safe,” Cait quickly promised, trying to stay calm even though her anxiety felt like it was gnawing at her heart.

They quickly made their way out of the prison that had kept her lover locked away from her for years, and it wasn’t until they were back on the boat heading towards the Undercity that either of them released the air that had been trapped in their lungs from the anticipation of potentially getting caught. Caitlyn had very low expectations that her plan to speak to the tattooed man would even work. She really didn’t think she’d successfully aid an inmate to get out of Stillwater, but miraculously, her shoddy plan had worked out better than she could have imagined.

Once they were off the boat, they found a quiet location away from prying eyes near the bridge to get into Zaun to discuss everything. It was nearing sunrise now. Cait had been up all night breaking Vi out of that prison, and exhaustion was starting to hit her. But this was it for her– if she couldn’t convince Vi to trust her, she would end up losing the love of her life again, and she’d be damned if she let that happen.

“You have about five seconds to start explaining what’s going on and why you’re an enforcer, or else I’m heading off on my own,” Vi demanded, her tone still cold and detached.

“I’m not– I mean, I was, but not anymore. It’s complicated,” Caitlyn sighed, feeling frustrated that her brain wasn’t cooperating with her mouth to properly explain.

“Then how are you wearing that?” Vi snarled, a grimace on her face from just looking at Caitlyn. It broke her heart all over again that Violet couldn’t even look at her without obvious disdain. “Seems pretty straightforward to me, princess. I should have known not to trust a Piltie. I should have known you’d be just like every other Topsider–”

“I went back for you!” Caitlyn shouted, not being able to hear another dig aimed at her anymore. Her outburst made Vi’s mouth snap shut, shock evident on her face from what Caitlyn had said. “That day, when everything fell apart– I saw the explosion from my bedroom. I ran as fast as I could, but I was too late. I saw what happened to Benzo and Sheriff Grayson. I followed to where all the smoke was coming from, and I–”

She choked on her words, feeling all the emotions that she had spent so long trying to shove down into neat little boxes so she could continue to move forward. Tears were gliding down her cheeks, but she didn’t care to wipe them away. Caitlyn longed to reach out for Vi, finally seeing some semblance of emotion from the other woman aside from resentment. But she knew it was too soon. She knew that the trust they once had wasn’t there anymore, and it would take a long time to get it back, if they could ever get it back. But the tears that were brimming in those grey eyes that she loved so dearly gave her hope that maybe there was a chance.

“I found Ekko in front of Vander’s body. Saw Claggor’s bloody goggles clutched in his hands. And he said all of you were dead. I thought you were dead,” Caitlyn cried, taking a step forward into Vi’s personal space. If she hadn’t been so tormented by the memories of the past, she would’ve been pleased that Vi didn’t back away. “I mourned for you. Every day for the last seven years, I have mourned for you. I became an enforcer to try to figure out what enforcers were on Silco’s payroll. It wasn’t a decision I made lightly, and god knows Ekko wasn’t pleased with my decision either, but he saw the importance behind it.”

“You’re still in contact with Ekko?” Vi croaked, the first words she was able to speak since Caitlyn had started to rehash the events of the past. Cait nodded in response and saw a soft smile form on Vi’s face. “How is he?”

“He’s so good, Vi,” she whispered. “As good as he can be considering the downfall of the Lanes. He formed his own group. He has a place for orphans or anyone looking for an escape from Silco’s grasp. He’s become quite the leader.”

“You’ve helped him?”

“As much as I can,” she confirmed. “Not nearly enough as I’d like, but that’s why I decided to join the enforcers until my mother got me laid off after an injury.”

“How did you get injured?” Vi asked, almost sounding a little concerned for the ex-enforcer’s well-being.

The momentum of Caitlyn’s explanation died on her tongue with the realization that she was about to break Violet’s heart all over again. She knew the information that she had on Powder would create an enormous amount of pain for her refound love, and she hated that she had to be the one to break the news to Vi. Cait licked her suddenly dry lips as she tried to formulate a way to say what she needed as painless as possible, but deep down she knew that trying to sugarcoat the truth wouldn’t help in this situation.

“After– that day, I thought all of you had died, but…” Cait stammered, choking on the words she so desperately needed to get out. “Silco, he got–”

“He has Powder,” Vi interrupted, a sad, knowing look in her gaze. “I saw him approach her after everything went down. After I blamed her for what happened.”

Cait watched as Vi started pacing, a calloused hand rubbing the back of her neck as she got lost in her own memories of what happened all those years ago. The turmoil Vi was experiencing made Caitlyn want to reach out to her again, but she knew that she shouldn’t, so she stood by and waited for the other woman to process her feelings.

“I tried to get to her when I saw him approach, but then Marcus knocked me out and dragged me to Stillwater.”

“It’s Marcus,” Cait whispered, not surprised but angry she hadn’t found evidence on him sooner. “He’s the one on Silco’s payroll.”

“Yup,” Vi scoffed, hatred for the coward dripping from her tone. “That poor excuse of a man is why Silco has gotten away with destroying the Undercity. Why Silco has Powder. I need to get her back.”

“Vi, you have to understand… she’s different now,” Cait tentatively said, stepping forward to finally reach out against her better judgment to stop the pacing. Her hand gently rested on Vi’s shoulder, feeling her initially stiffen at the touch but relaxing shortly after.

“Different, how?”

“You asked about my injury before, and– it was due to an explosion that she caused. It killed four other enforcers,” Cait explained, hoping the gravity of the circumstances was properly conveyed to the woman who had not seen the outside world in years. “She… goes by the name Jinx now.”

Vi stumbled back from Cait’s touch as if she had been burned, tears immediately threatening to spill from those hauntingly beautiful grey eyes that Caitlyn had longed to look into again since the day she had lost Vi. Vi’s breathing became labored as the words washed over her as if she was fighting off a panic attack.

“This is my fault,” she cried, a tear falling that she angrily swiped away. She looked as if she was about to collapse, and Caitlyn quickly reached back out to catch her. They both crumpled to the ground, Cait’s arm wrapped tightly around Vi’s shoulders as the other girl sobbed into her chest. “This is all my fault.”

“No, darling,” Caitlyn soothed, stroking her free hand through pink hair. “The only one to blame is Silco.”

“I told her she was a jinx. I blamed her for all of them dying. She only wanted to help,” Vi continued to sob, clutching onto Caitlyn’s uniform. “She only wanted to help.”

All Caitlyn could do was hold Violet until her tears stopped falling and her breathing was back under control. There were no reassuring words that Caitlyn could provide the other woman because she didn’t know where this road was going to lead them. She didn’t know if Vi would even want her to be by her side through all of this, so she just held onto Vi while she still had the chance to. The ex-enforcer didn’t know how much time had passed as they sat there together, but when Vi finally pulled back, the sun had fully risen, and the rest of the city seemed to be waking up.

“I have to get her back. I have to get through to her,” Vi sniffled, a look of determination reflected in her eyes. She slowly stood from their seated position, and Cait suddenly felt cold from the loss of contact with her former girlfriend.

“I know you do, but Vi, it isn’t going to be easy. Silco has done a number on her over the years,” Caitlyn warned.

“I have to try anyway. I can’t give up on her again,” Vi said. Her grey eyes scanned Caitlyn’s face as if weighing the decision of whether or not she could trust the ex-enforcer. After a moment, a wrapped, calloused hand reached down towards Caitlyn. “Are you with me?”

There wasn’t a moment of hesitation. Caitlyn immediately grasped the hand extended to her. She wouldn’t allow Vi to slip away from her again after years apart. She was more determined than she ever had been to rebuild the relationship they once shared, even if it only ever led to friendship. Violet was far too important to her to let the other woman do this on her own.

“Always.”

[chairhahaha]

canon es looks like a pathetic baby

i love how u end up analysing every piece you see ur so smart

i honestly hate how everyone handled it so childishly like ur telling me that everyone in vivid street watched an obliviously continue to wait for nagi for YEARS not even a few months or weeks it was most of her life???😭😭 i know they wanted to fufil nagi’s final wish but honestly that’s just so wrong. also taiga what the fuck man how r u gonna destroy an’s dreams like that then bring the entire group JUST TO PROVE THAT VBS CANT BEAT RAD WEEKEND ARE YOU DENSE ok ignore that anyways no way the entire town agreed that this was okay?????

ur right though milgram’s treatment is way more inhumane what the hell is wrong with them, as far as i’m aware i think all the wardens introduced (novel and music project) r like high schoolers. DUDE😭😭😭 imagine just being a normal teenagerthen u wake up with no memory of what u were doing before and get told by a talking chromosome that ur surrounded by murderers thats absolutely terrifying

THE STACKS OF PAPER WHAT THE HELL not even the excessive hw i get could get that bad

idk if u read Side S yet but I’ll spoil it under cut bc good god

Es KNOWS that their memory Was wiped and they don’t gaf because

“I want to be a beautiful warden if that’s the case, if memories are impurities for a warden, then they are unnecessary” Like WHAT THE FUCK WHAT HAS MILGRAM DONE TO YOU

milgram wardens r honestly so dehumanised to the point where nothing else but the verdicts they give is important. jackalop is so. ew i like making fun of him but he also seems genuinely frightening in the sense that he’s a higher rank than es so he could. do anything to them. dont even get me started on novel jackalope she can literally strangle the wardens like “do you want to stop breathing too?” SHUT UP PLEASE

I want t3 so badlu but at the same time im so horrified

ANALYSIS READING TIME!

i feel like i could pull up with this and you’d still find a way to analyse it/pos

edit: WHO VOTED ON THE POLL LMFAOOOOO

messy hair es!!!! i only did that so it wouldn’t look too basic but omg!!!!!!! yes es is clutching onto themselves and their heart, idk i js copied the original poseLMAO

the duller clothing has no meaning i just love playing with saturation

ur flower analysis is so good holy shit i was just trying to doodle those rlly basic flowers bc i was NOT drawing all that detail on an’s shitt. abandonment. oh god the prisoners

“if u put a red and white flower together something something someone will die” <- looks at a prisoner

Okay I Actually Lied I Did Want To Put Symbolism (abt the person behind es)

You are correct that is supposed to be past es, i was trynna go for like there’s nothing much to past es’ design because es doesn’t know their past self so. they could be anything . so like the basic ness in the design means that there’s not much u can really say about a past you don’t remember WHAT AM I SAYING

“they died before even becoming a warden” HOLY FUCKING SHITTTTRTT THATS SO SICK I HATE MILGRAM

the pancreas thing is so cool i didnt even know that what

the longer hair was entirely an accident its bc i didnt have a reference of es’ back hair. but of course kani finds a way to analyse it and still make it make sense. ahoge was also unintentional LMFAO es is implied to have a bad past so it makes sense that pre milgram es would be depressed

THE NUMBER OF FLOWERS TOO?? i honestly had no idea numbers had symbolisms i just pasted a bunch of flowers everywhere so the background wouldnt look basic

i DEFO drew them looking like hearts but i tried drawing petals scattered everywhere. the hearts look cute tho

did u know i based the fence off the wall thing in ur engeki es art😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊

the fence bar things is supposed to represent milgram bc. the gold things r in milgram. es’ room. and the fact that warden es and past es r separated by that fence implies that milgram is preventing es from uhh knowing their past/true self by putting a fence and hiding the past from them

idk shit about fences so im just gonna go with whatever u said about facing outwards and inwards bc it still makes sm sense😭

oh god the heart being split apart because es was ripped from their childhood and since its a fence they can’t get it back

^ that was NOT intentional i just wanted to say smt

i think i need to get better at symbolisms like i’m literally a milgram fan

THANK TOU SO MUCHHH OH MY GOF DON’T KYS YOU CAN DIE FROM THAT🙏🙏🙏🙏

下剋上

i need to stop drawing them with a baby face all the time😭😭

if u find any symbolisms here it was probably an accident i suck at analysing and all that

An and Es when they have 2 letter names and were raised in an environment that they believed and trusted in only to realise that the truth was being hidden from them (if that makes sense)

who died???? probably their freedom

^ if that makes. sense (I SAID THAT ALREADY)

based off this

if u saw me post this b4 u didnt

[diabetes-365]

Hey tumblr friends, fellow diabetics. I just watched a rather mediocre movie with well known actors, and although the movie was far from Oscar worthy, it got me thinking about my life with diabetes.

The movie is Spiderhead, don’t bother lol. Chris Hemsworth and Miles Teller, idk who roped them into it - or how much Netflix was paying them, but here I am posting on tumblr at 2 AM about it haha. (No major spoilers ahead).

The movie is about drugs given to inmates and tests done on them. In this day in age, they convey that effect on a phone - a simple swipe of the finger and the test subject (a person) is given whatever dosage of this drug, and it effects them immediately, and if too much is given, it can be lethal.

Sound…familiar?

My phone, has an app that’s connected to a device on me (CGM), that displays blood sugar numbers every few minutes. In the very near future, my Omnipod PDM, personal diabetes manager, will be integrated into that app, or a separate app, and everything will be done a phone. One, single point of failure. To me - it’s scary to think about.

Also - crazy coincidence - but the other day I just so happened to run into someone the other day at a coffee shop - who’s literally working for Omnipod and that future that I just mentioned. He said he was a developer working on the software - being a product manager myself for software, and someone who’s literally wearing an Omnipod, I had a bit of a chat with him. I actually told him my fears too, about a single point of failure, and ya know - what if someone hacks my phone?!

There will be a future where your blood glucose level AND your insulin management, happens from one device. To me that seems inevitable. And to me, that’s terrifying. Imagine someone hacks your phone and cranks the insulin dosage up, or does the reverse and turns it off. Accidentally or maliciously. I don’t know about you - but thoughts about this type of thing comes up frequently for me.

Not the hacking of a device per day, that shit can and probably will happen - but what comes up more is…the fragile mortality us type 1 diabetics have because of our dependency on insulin, and devices.

Now granted this movie is in the future (it appears so), and it’s ridiculous in nature…but it still somehow finds its way to fuck with my brain.

It’s almost the same way a zombie movie fucks with me. As a type 1 diabetic, I would be - barring any zombie bites to the group - I would be the first to die. Even if we made it to a pharmacy during Armageddon - there’s simply only enough insulin for x amount of time, and when there’s no more, I die.

I know, I KNOW, this is fucked up to think about. But when your life is run by numbers every single solitary second, and your only alive because this solution inside of a vial - you think about things differently.

I mean, when I hear a electronic beeps out in public, I’m not sure if it was me - or if it’s just a noise of a chicken fryer, or a truck, or something else. I’ll literally check my Omnipod JUST to be sure I’m not in any danger.

Granted - I’m extremely and utterly privileged in my life that even when something goes wrong with my pump or CGM or blood sugar - I’m most likely able to fix the issue myself, or get assistance before I’m in a true near death scenario. Despite that, I still have fears.

I mean for fuck sake I’m watching a futuristic movie about drugs in inmates and all I think is…yeah I know what that’s like. The prisoners in this movie are “free” to roam the premises, they can play video games, ping pong, nothing is locked, but things are fhat way because they agree to the experiments.

Diabetic life is kind of similar - in that we are free, we can run marathons, climb Everest, do incredible feats - but we are bound to this ever present threat. A threat on our very lives.

I’ve spoken on here many times about how - how I do feel strong, despite diabetes. I know right now it seems like I’m being incredibly morbid, pessimistic? Idk.

I have always been real on tumblr, and that’s what I’m trying to be. I do feel at times, incredibly fragile because of this disease. This movie made me feel a button press away from death, and when I stop and think about it - it scares me. Like if someone truly wanted to, they could snatch my PDM without me noticing, get passed the code, and then destroy me.

I suppose, life’s fragile for anyone really. I’m just up late at night talking about someone killing me, and yet tomorrow I could get t-boned by a semi truck while driving to the grocery store. Ok yeah, definitely being morbid, but just being real.

Technology has saved me though. Insulin’s mass manufacturing, Omnipod, and CGM’s. It’s really incredible what’s even changed since I was diagnosed in 2011. Things have gotten smaller, better, easier to use, and I now have more information than ever at finger tips too.

So what are your thoughts? When you watch zombie movies or futuristic movies, does your min run wild with what you’d do or where’d you go? Does your mind jump to - how much insulin is in your fridge right NOW?! Or am I the only one losing my mind lol.

Just…don’t hack my phone, or my PDM, and I’ll sleep better at night. 🤣

[tricksters-captain]

Bucky Barnes imagines - Some Sunny Day Part 2

AN: I’m splitting episode 3 into two chapters because so much happens. 

Summary: Before the Blip, you and Bucky were close. After you both returning and Tony’s funeral, you decided to go back to your home town to spend time with your family. When duty calls, you return.  

In this chapter: Despite your protests, Bucky seeks out Zemo (Based on S1 EP3)

(PART 1 HERE)

Pairing(s): Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader, Sam Wilson x Platonic!Reader

Word Count: 5,196

Warnings: Spoilers for episode 3, violence, strong language. 

You watched Bucky as he sat beside you on the aircraft. 

“Do you mind?” Bucky’s side eye didn’t make you look away. 

“I’m just trying to see what’s going through that head of yours.” You confessed. You were all on your way to Germany to visit Zemo. It wasn’t a plan you were happy with but it was the plan. 

“Don’t bother.” Bucky frowned, looking down at his hands on his lap. “And don’t ask me if I think this is a good idea again.” 

“I wasn’t going to ask that.” You turned away from the man.

“What was it then?” Bucky asked. 

“I was going to ask if you were sure you wanted to do this.” It was another question you had already asked 20 times or more but you couldn’t shake the overwhelming feeling of anxiety about this trip. 

“She has a right to be worried, Buck. The last time you were alone with Zemo, you ended up putting (Y/n) through three windows.” Sam reminded you both of what happened the last time you were in Berlin. 

“It won’t happen this time.” Bucky tried to reassure you both but you still felt uneasy. 

After another hour or so Sam announced that you were almost there. 

It was a short drive to the prison from the airport but once you were inside, you felt your chest begin to tighten again. 

“He’s just through that corridor.” The German guard gestured up ahead and that’s when Bucky stopped you. 

“Alright. Give us a sec.” Bucky instructed the security guard before turning to you and Sam. “I’m gonna go in alone.”

“Why?” Sam asked, 

“You’re Avengers. You know how he feels about that.” Bucky said as he looked between the two of you. 

“It’s not like you two were known for frolickin’ in the sun together.” Sam felt he needed to remind Bucky of the past again. However, Bucky stood his ground. 

“He was obsessed with HYDRA. We have a history together. Trust me. I got it.” 

“Buck...” You started, 

“I got it.” He repeated himself before you could say anything else. 

You watched Bucky head through the doors alone. 

“Let’s wait outside. This place gives me the creeps.” Sam encouraged you to follow him to which you didn’t do without hesitation. 

Sam brought you a hot drink as you sat on a bench outside. 

“I forgot how worried he can make you.” Sam admitted as he sat down beside you.

“I’ve seen what he went through, Sam. All of it leading up to Zemo. I just... I don’t want it happening to him again.” You knew you couldn’t explain the extent of why you cared for Bucky. 

“You love him.” Sam said. It wasn’t a question but rather a statement. “I can see it clear as day. Anyone could if they stuck around long enough.” 

“Why are you bringing this up, Sam?” You sighed, looking away from him. 

“Because it’s also obvious that he loves you too. You run around driving each other crazy with worry but you have none of the good stuff that comes with being in love with someone.” 

“What do you know about love, Don Juan?” You chuckled as you tried to lighten the tone.

“I know it when I see it.” Sam smiled but there was a sadness behind his eyes. 

“Things are complicated, Sam.” You muttered, “You already know that.” 

“Well I also think that if Bucky got some he’d be a whole lot less angsty all the damn time.” You knew Sam only said it to make you laugh but you still gave him a whack for the comment. 

“Shut up, Sam.” You shook your head, trying not to smile at the inappropriate comment. 

Sam kept you entertained by a couple of silly games of rock, paper, scissors before Bucky returned. 

“Come on, I got some information. We gotta go.” Bucky hurried you and Sam along. 

“Just like that?” You were surprised that Zemo even spoke to Bucky at all. 

“A location. I’ll explain everything once we get there.” Bucky wasn’t giving you much information and it was making you a little suspicious. 

“Hey, hey, hey...” Sam ran after Bucky, stopping him. “You gotta give us a little more than that.”

“Zemo agreed to help us after hearing that there were more super soldiers. It was his life ambition to stop the winter soldier programme and he’s given us a lead.” Bucky explained. 

“And you’re just gonna trust his word?” You probed. 

“There’s not much else we can do.” Bucky did make a point. 

It didn’t take long to reach the large warehouse/garage that Bucky wanted to go to. 

Bucky on the way had started rambling about breaking Zemo out of jail in order to help you guys which sounded ridiculous to you. 

“Tell me you’re joking, Buck.” You pleaded, unsure whether he had lost his mind entirely. 

“He’s our best shot at finding who is making the serum and he’d be a lot more useful out than in.” Bucky opened the door to the building and you followed him inside.

“What are you talking about? You wanna break Zemo outta jail? Where are we, Buck? Have you lost your mind?” Sam was just as lost as you were as he shot questions at Bucky. 

“We have no leads, no moves, nothing.” Bucky sighed as you made your way in with your flashlights. 

“What we have is one of the most dangerous men in the world behind bars.” Sam argued. 

“We also have eight Super Soldiers that are loose.” Bucky retorted. 

“Anyway, I thought this was a lead?” You tried to look around but the place was badly lit. There were mainly mechanic tools and lots of storage scattered around. 

“It’s complicated.” Bucky frowned.

“What’s complicated is Zemo. He’s gonna mess with our minds. Especially yours. No offence.” Sam shone his flashlight at Bucky as he spoke. 

“Offence.” Bucky didn’t look impressed as he found the light switch. “Super Soldiers go against everything he believes in. He is crazy, but he still has a code.” 

“I’ve been on the wrong side of that code and so have you. He blew up the UN, he killed King T’Chaka and framed you for it. Did you forget that? You think the Wakandans forgot about it? It’s a rhetorical question. They didn’t. I know why this matters to you, but it’s pushing you off the deep end.” Sam stepped closer to Bucky. You couldn’t deny that Sam had a point. Zemo was the one who tore the avengers apart by framing Bucky.  “We don’t know how they’re gettin’ the serum. We don’t even know how many of them there are.” Bucky couldn’t give up. “Let me just walk you through a hypothetical. Can I?”

“What did you do?” Sam narrowed his eyes at Bucky. 

You were busy looking inside the car that was revealed by the lights coming on. 

“I didn’t do anything.” Bucky shook his head before he continued with his ‘hypothetical’. 

“The weakest point in any system isn’t the software, the hardware, it’s the meatware. The human element. Now, in this lockup, it’s nine to one, prisoners to guards. And if two prisoners start fighting, then the protocol says four guards have to respond.”

“So why would two prisoners randomly start fighting at that moment? Who knows?” Sam questioned. 

“There could be many reasons…” Bucky shrugged. “But the point is, these things escalate. Lockdown procedures would have to be initiated, and with all those bodies flying around left and right, wouldn’t be hard to slip down a hallway or two.

At this point, you stopped looking around and looked over at Bucky with your arms across your chest. You weren’t liking how thought out this plan was sounding. 

“And if the fire alarm got tripped while the prisoners were being separated someone could use the chaos to their advantage.” Bucky continued. 

“I don’t like how casual you’re bein’ about this. This is unnatural. Are you… And where are we, man?” Sam gestured around the place with confusion locked on his face. 

“Bucky, I’m with Sam on this one. I’ve got a bad feeling and–––” A door opening behind you cut you short. 

You turned around to see Zemo walk through the plastic door curtains. 

“Woah, woah, woah!” Sam jumped forward instructively. Bucky managed to stop him but he didn't stop you. 

You rushed towards Zemo and held the tip of one of your knives to his Adams apple as he held his hands up. 

“What are you doing here?” Sam shouted at Zemo before snapping back to Bucky.

“I didn’t tell ’cause I knew you wouldn’t let this happen.” Bucky admitted. 

“What did you do?” Sam pointed at Zemo in shock.

“We need him.” Bucky stated to which you chuckled harshly, pressing your knife a little harder. 

“You’re going back to prison!” Sam called over. 

“If I may..? “ Zemo tried to speak but you all shut him up with a unanimous ‘No.’

“Apologies.” Zemo mumbled. 

“(Y/n), put the knife down.” Bucky came towards you and wrapped his hand round your wrist. “Please?” 

You did. Slowly. 

“Look, when Steve refused to sign the Sokovia Accords, you both backed him. You broke the law, and you stuck your neck out for me. I’m asking you to do it again.” Bucky looked back and forth from you to Sam. 

“I really think I’m invaluable.” Zemo spoke again. 

“Shut up.” You rose the knife again to which Zemo took a step back and pretended to zip his mouth shut. 

“Okay.” Sam sighed after a moment of contemplation. “If we do this, you don’t make a move without our permission.”

“Fair.” Zemo nodded. 

“Bucky... You understand what this means right? If they find out we took Zemo, specifically you. We’ll be on the run again and I don’t know if there will be a pardon this time either.” The concern in your eyes made Bucky frown. 

“It’ll be alright. He's the only shot we got to stop these guys.” Bucky wasn’t sure if he believed his own words but he was praying that this was the best thing to do. 

“Alright.” You turned to Zemo. “So where do we start?”

Zemo gestured for you to follow him before taking you into another dark room. You kept your knife in your hand just in case.

He reached for the light switch to reveal a mass of classic cars. 

“So our first move is grand theft auto?” Sam cocked his eyebrow at the impressive collection.  

“These are mine. Collected by family over the generations. I spent years hunting people HYDRA recruited to recreate the serum. Because once it’s out there, someone can create an army of people… like the Avengers.”  Zemo entered one of the cars and pulled out a bag. “I ended the Winter Soldier program once before. I have no intention to leave my work unfinished. To do this, we’ll have to scale a ladder of lowlifes.”

“Well, join the party. We’ve already started.” Sam told the man.

“First stop is a woman named Selby. Mid-level fence I still have a line on. From there, we climb.” Zemo took his bag and headed into another room. 

“Jesus... How big is this place?” You looked around to see it was full of clothes. 

“First I change and then we head to Selby.” Zemo placed the bag down before filing through one if the rails of clothes. 

“How are we supposed to get anywhere with Zemo on our hands? We can’t exactly call Torres and ask for a ride but please ignore the fugitive that’s coming with us.” You looked between the boys. 

“I will get us there.” Zemo told you. 

“Great.” You pressed a fake smile onto your face which Zemo chose not to acknowledge.

Before you knew it you were at the airport at Zemo’s private jet.

“So all this time you’ve been rich?” Sam’s eyes went wide at the sight of the plane.

“I’m a Baron, Sam. My family was royalty until your friends destroyed my country.” Zemo spoke as if it was well known information. You felt a pang hit you in the chest, it happened every time you thought of Sokovia... it was guilt. 

You watched Zemo greet an elderly man in a suit before you entered the jet. 

You sat furtherest away from Zemo, still feeling very uncomfortable about him being free and under your custody. 

You watched him sip on a glass of champagne like he had no worries in the world. 

“You don’t know what it’s like to be locked in a cell. Oh. That’s right you do.” Zemo reminded you of the time Tony had locked a lot of the avengers up. 

“Why don’t you tell us about where we’re going?” Sam suggested. 

 “I’m sorry. I was just fascinated by this. I don’t know what to call it, but this part seems to be important. Who is Nakajima?” 

Before you could blink, Bucky had lunged forward and taken Zemo by the neck.  

“If you touch that again, I’ll kill you.” Bucky kept hold of Zemo for a second longer before sitting back down. You had fought the urge to get up and take hold of his arm to calm him down.  

"I’m sorry. I understand that list of names. People you’ve wronged as the Winter Soldier.” Zemo made no attempt at a sincere apology for the invasion of privacy.  

“Don’t push it.”  Bucky warned him.

“I’ve seen that book. It was Steve’s when he came out of the ice. I told him about Trouble Man. He wrote it in that book. Did you hear it? What’d you think?” Sam smiled as he thought back on the memory. 

“I like ’40s music, so…” Bucky shrugged. 

“You didn’t like it?” Sam seemed more shock to hear this than when he saw Zemo. 

“I liked it.” Bucky proclaimed. 

“It is a masterpiece, James. Complete. Comprehensive. It captures the African-American experience.” Even Zemo had to get involved. 

“He’s out of line, but he’s right. It’s great. Everybody loves Marvin Gaye.” Sam turned back to Bucky after giving side eye to Zemo. 

“I like Marvin Gaye.” Bucky repeated. 

“Steve adored Marvin Gaye.” Sam couldn’t drop it but you didn’t bother getting involved. 

You looked at the book in Bucky’s hands. You knew Steve had given it to him before but seeing it again after all this time brought up a hundred thoughts. You remembered the many things you had told Steve to watch or eat or listen to like ABBA, Mochi ice cream and pranking him by suggesting the twilight movie as must see. 

“You must have really looked up to Steve.” Zemo mentioning Steve made you look up again. “But I realised something when I met him. The danger with people like him, America’s Super Soldiers, is that we put them on pedestals.”

“Watch your step, Zemo.” Sam warned him. 

“They become symbols. Icons. And then we start to forget about their flaws. From there, cities fly, innocent people die. Movements are formed, wars are fought. You remember that, right?” Zemo looked over at Bucky. “As a young soldier sent to Germany to stop a mad icon. Do we want to live in a world full of people like the Red Skull? That is why we’re going to Madripoor.” 

“What’s up with Madripoor? You talk about it like it’s Skull Island.” Sam asked but you already knew of Madripoor. Anyone with links to the underworld of crime knew of Madripoor. 

“It’s an island nation in the Indonesian archipelago. It was a pirate sanctuary back in the 1800s.” Bucky informed him. 

“It’s kept its lawless ways. But we cannot exactly walk in as ourselves. James, you will have to become someone you claim is gone.” Zemo looked down at his duffel bag of clothes that you had watched him pack before.

“What do you mean by that?” You finally chimed into the conversation. 

“James will have to retake the person of the Winter Soldier. You both will have a role to play also.” Zemo explained, turning to face you as you sat in the chair by the back wall of the jet. 

“Bucky, can I speak to you privately?” You looked past Zemo to Bucky. Bucky gave you a look to ask where would you go so you stood and opened the cabin toilets door. 

Bucky huffed before following you in.

“Bucky I’m not okay with this.” You whispered as you pressed yourself up against the wall so you could try and fit both you and Bucky a little more comfortably. 

“This isn’t up to you.” Bucky sighed. 

 “Everything about this situation is making every nerve in my body scream this is a bad idea.” You folded your arms across your chest as you stared up at Bucky. 

“How many times do I have to tell you that this is the only plan we got?” 

“I don’t trust him.” You kept your voice low as you threw your hand up in the direction of the door. 

“Do you trust me?” Bucky asked. 

“I’m starting to question it.” You muttered. 

Bucky just stared at you in response. 

“Yes, I trust you.” You grumbled, caving in. 

“Anyway I have you if things go bad.” Bucky tried to make light of the situation but you weren't impressed. 

You left the bathroom and remained silent until you drew closer to Madripoor. 

Upon your arrival in Madripoor, you were handed some clothes to change into. 

“You’ve got to be kidding me?” You held up the small material dress that you were meant to wear. 

“I had to choose a disguise that would cover your face. Too many people here would know you from your days before the avengers and after.” Zemo defended his choice of ‘costume’ for you. 

“So I’m assassin barbie?” You scoffed before taking to the bathroom to change. 

You slid on the black leather playsuit and boots, along with the mask that Zemo gave you. 

You felt exposed and uncomfortable. You managed to hide a few knives in your boots and you slid on a thigh holster to hold some more to make you feel like you were protected at least. 

“Loose the knives.” Zemo instructed. 

“Are you serious?” You were growing more agitated by the minute with this man. 

“You are playing an escort. You can’t have knives on show.” Zemo pointed to your holster. 

You bit down on your cheek as you removed it. 

“Fine.” You then left the plane to Sam and Bucky waiting outside. Bucky’s eyes went wide at the sight of you but he tried to hide it by clearing his throat and looking away. 

“We have to fix this. I’m the only one who looks like a pimp.” Sam was wearing a red patterned suit and chains. He didn’t look too bad in it either.

“Only an American would assume a fashion-forward Black man looks like a pimp. You look exactly like the man you’re supposed to be playing. The sophisticated, charming African rake named Conrad Mack, aka the Smiling Tiger.” Zemo handed Sam his phone revealing a picture of Conrad Mack.

“He even has a bad nickname. Hell, he does look like me, though.” Sam took the phone and looked down at the picture. 

“(Y/n) is playing your partner for the night. Conrad is known for his appreciation for the finer things in life and often has a woman on his arm Therefore, (Y/n), you must be attached to Sam’s hip the entire night.” Zemo filled you all in on the reason behind your disguise. 

“Excuse me, what?” Bucky almost choked at the idea of you having to be Sam’s woman for the night. 

“Well it is the only disguise that makes sense. She can’t be your girlfriend as you are the Winter Soldier. She can’t be mine as everyone knows I am loyal to my wife. She has to be the smiling tigers current whore.” 

“Watch your mouth.” Bucky hissed. 

“We all must play a part.” Zemo defended his choice of words. “You smell this?”

“Yeah, what is that? Acid?” Sam asked. 

“Madripoor. No matter what happens, we have to stay in character. Our lives depend on it. There’s no margin for error. High Town’s that way. Not a bad place if you wanna visit, but Low Town’s the other way.” Zemo gestured across the city as a car approached you all. 

“Let me guess. We don’t have any friends in High Town.” You sighed as Zemo opened the car door for you. 

“Not if we want the answers we are looking for.” Zemo climbed into the car after you and then the boys followed. 

It didn't take too long to find the way to low town. You had been to Madripoor before but it had been years ago. 

You did as you were ordered when you all exited Zemo’s car. You stuck by Sam, walking in the middle of Sam and Bucky. 

The air wasn’t cold but it felt thick, you could feel it sticking to your bare skin which gave you the desperate urge to take a long shower. 

“Here we are.” Zemo had brought you to a bar. It was busy and filled with a lot of men.  

“Ready to comply, Winter Soldier?” You heard Zemo ask Bucky in Russian. 

You heard whispers around you questioning if Bucky was who everyone thought he was. It made your gut clench with nerves but you didn’t let it show. 

“Hello, gentlemen. Wasn’t expecting you, Smiling Tiger.” The bartender greeted Sam and Zemo but barely brushed a glance over you.

“His plans changed. We have business to do with Selby.” Zemo spoke for Sam. You then felt Sam wrap his arm around your waist. You leaned into him, batting your eyelashes first at Sam and then the bartender. 

“The usual?” The bartender asked Sam. He nodded, afraid that if he spoke then it would give away the facade. 

You were thankful you were wearing a face mask when you saw the drink made for the Smiling Tiger. You grimaced at the dead snake being cut open and then again when one of its organs was dropped into Sam’s shot. 

“Ah, Smiling Tiger. Your favourite.” Zemo picked up his own drink as he looked down at Sam’s. 

“I love these.” Sam forced himself to speak. 

“Cheers, Conrad.” Zemo and Sam touched glasses before Sam hesitantly shot back the drink. You could tell Bucky enjoyed watching that. 

“I got word from on high. You ain’t welcome here.” A man suddenly approached from behind and tapped Zemo on the shoulder. You felt Sam’s grip on you tighten protectively. 

“I have no business with the Power Broker, but if he insists, he can either come and talk to me...” Zemo held his hand out to show his new bodyguard. 

“New haircut?” The stranger looked Bucky up and down. 

“Or bring Selby for a chat.” Zemo gave him the other option. The man retreated. 

“A power broker? Really?” Bucky spoke once the stranger had left.

“Every kingdom needs its king. Let’s just pray we stay under his radar.”

“Do you know him?” Sam asked. 

“Only by reputation.” Zemo admitted honestly.

“In Madripoor he is judge, jury, and executioner. You can’t visit low town without appearing on his radar.” You spoke up as you let yourself look around the room and take in just how many threats were around. 

“And you know this why?” Sam looked down at you. He must've forgotten your past. 

“I was a free agent before the Avengers. I've been here undercover a few times especially when I was a young teenager. Surprise Surprise evil guys like little girls.” You kept quiet in case anyone around was listening. 

Zemo suddenly spoke a command for Bucky in Russian once again and that’s when another stranger put his hands on Zemo. 

You watched Bucky follow orders and he didn’t hold back. 

He grabbed hold of the strangers wrist and pulled him off Zemo before attacking him and several others around. 

You took notice of those around with their phones out. Cameras...

You went to step forward when you felt Sam squeeze your side. He gave you a look that told you no. 

“Didn’t take much for him to fall back into form.” Zemo muttered to you and Sam. You wanted to punch him. 

Bucky slammed another man onto the bar and that’s when you heard the wave of guns cocking. 

Sam took hold of Bucky’s arm when Zemo told him to stay in character. 

Instead Zemo told Bucky to stand down once you were informed you could see Selby. 

Sam took hold of you hand and dragged you along side him as you all left the bar. 

“She isn’t welcome.” One of the guards stopped you before you could enter the room. 

“Excuse me?” Sam scoffed at the guard. “She’s with me and so she is welcome.” 

“Let her in!” You heard an English accent call from ahead. 

“You should know, Baron. People don’t just come into my bar and make demands.” Selby was an older woman with a white pixie cut and a sly grin. Sam remained stood and so did Bucky but Sam had commanded you to take a seat next to Zemo. 

“Not a demand. An offer.” Zemo was impressing you by how cool he was playing this. It also worried you. 

“A lot has changed since you were here last. By the way, I thought you were rotting away in a German prison. How did you escape?“ Selby asked. 

“People like us always find a way, don’t we? I’m sure you’ve already figured out what I’m here for.”

“You’re taller than I’d heard, Smiling Tiger.” Selby ignored Zemo as she eyed up Sam.” What’s the offer?”

“Tell us what you know about the super-soldier serum. And I give you him, along with the code words to control him, of course. He will do anything you want.”Zemo had risen from his seat and held Bucky by the chin. 

“Now that’s the Zemo I remember. I’m glad I decided not to kill you immediately. Yeah, you were right to come to me. Arrogant, but right. The super-soldier serum is here in Madripoor. Dr. Wilfred Nagel is the man you wanna thank...Or condemn, depending on what side of this you’re on. The Power Broker had him working on the serum, but… things didn’t go as planned.” Selby fed you what she knew. 

“Is Nagel still in Madripoor?” Zemo questioned. 

“Oh. The bread crumbs you can have for free, but the bakery is gonna cost you, Baron. And before you get all cute, don’t think you can find Nagel without me.” Selby pushed herself from her seat and walked across the room. 

That’s when Sam’s mobile went off. 

“Answer it. On speaker.” Selby ordered. The gun behind Sam made him pull out his phone. 

“Hello?” He answered. 

“Hey, um, we need to talk about this situation. It’s been drivin’ me nuts.” A woman’s voice came through. 

“What situation exactly are you talkin’ about?” Sam tried his best to keep up his persona. 

“Are you high? You know what situation, it’s the only situation me and you have.” The woman’s attitude was not helping Sam’s case. 

“What situation, Sarah? Say it.” Sam demanded. 

“The damn boat. And watch your tone. Okay? I let you slide at the bank.” Sarah snapped back. 

“The bank. Yeah. Laundered so much...” Sam chuckled. “Yeah, they’ll come around.”

“If that was the case, then why’d they dog you out, Big Time?” Sarah asked. 

“Yeah, you damn right I’m Big Time. You’ll see when I have that banker killed.” Sam tried to seem intimidating but at that moment you knew you were screwed. You reached down into your boot to take a knife just in case. 

“Cass! What’d I tell you about the Cheerios? I don’t have time for this! Sam, I’m sorry. I’ll call you back.” Sarah had used Sam’s name and that was the end of it. 

“Sam? Who’s Sam?” Selby looked pissed. “Kill them!” She ordered but before her hired men could react, a bullet came through the window and shot Selby down. 

You snatched two knives from your boot and sent them into the guard behind Sam. 

Bucky immediately reacted with taking out the other guard. 

“They’re gonna pin this on us.” You took the knives from the body as the boys took the guns. 

“We have a real problem now, so leave your weapons and follow my lead.” Zemo’s order made the boys put their guns down but you just wiped your knives and placed them back in your boot. 

You left the club in a hurry. Text chimes went off around you and you knew the power broker had seen what happened. 

You were well and truly fucked. 

“This is not good.” Zemo’s last words before the shooting started. 

You took off alongside Bucky and Sam, cursing the fact that Zemo had put you in the most uncomfortable shoes on the planet. 

“I can’t run in these heels!” Sam shouted which almost made you laugh. 

“Down here!” You took a turn into an alley to get off the road as two mopeds appeared behind you. 

Before you could spin around to fight, a shooter had taken them out. 

“You seem to have a guardian angel.” Zemo looked just. as confused you felt. You weren’t aware you knew anyone who was in Madripoor at the moment. 

“Well, this is too perfect. Drop it, Zemo.” A familiar face soon revealed itself from the shadows. 

“Sharon?” Sam furrowed his brow at the woman. 

“You cost me everything.” Sharon ignore Sam as she spoke to Zemo. 

“Sharon, wait. Someone recreated the super-soldier serum and Zemo had a lead.” Sam stepped ahead of Zemo to protest him. 

“That explains why you guys are here. And Selby’s dead.”Sharon glowered at the four of you. 

“So what are you doing here?” Bucky asked the question on everyones mind. 

“I stole Steve’s shield, remember? I also took the wings for your ass, so that you could save him from him. I didn’t have the Avengers to back me up. So I’m off the grid in Madripoor.” Sharon informed you.

“Don’t blow smoke. Both (Y/n) and I were on the run, too.” Sam didn't bother with feeling pity. 

“Was. Is. Big difference. I don’t speak to my family anymore. I can’t. My own father doesn’t know where I am.” Sharon shot back. 

“Listen, Sharon, we need your help.” Bucky interrupted her before she could say anything else.  

“Please.” You added. You and Sharon were friendly for a time before the world went to hell. You figured she’d help you at least. 

“This isn’t over. I have a place in High Town. You’ll be safe there for a while.” Sharon sighed, giving in and lowering her gun. 

“Thank you.” You pressed a small smile onto your face but Sharon didn’t reciprocate. 

She managed to get you to a car safely and you headed out of low town for the night. 

(PART 3 HERE)

Bucky Barnes Tag List 

@florencxs @mystictimetravelcolor @yourphotographyteen16 @shannon-posts @darkbluenovember @sexwithhiddlesbatch @thefandomimagines @mydarkness-itsnotmyfriend @sad-huffle-nerd @glitchingghosts​ @themaddies-obx​

[testingcheats0n]

Massive Dream SMP Fic Rec!!

Hey- Hi, I just feel like there are a ton of fanfiction that's really underrated in this fandom- so I'm going to dump it on your dash!!! Most of it is going to be Tommy-centric or SBI-centric, but they are very good!

Source: Me

Finished Fanfics:

Multi-chaptered Fanfics:

that's, like, a hundred miles by No_one_you_know

Dream would kill him. Dream was going to kill him- he was going to- no, he wouldn’t. Dream was his friend- friends don’t hit each other- Dream was supposed to take care of him- Dream /was/ taking care of him.

It hurt to breathe. It hurt to think. He couldn’t clear his thoughts as he stumbled to the family computer, pulling up a tab on google and frantically typing the name into the search bar.

The words Technoblade Watson stared back at him, the little black bar at the end of the letters blinking slowly, mocking him.

Why, of all people, did it have to be Technoblade?

in short: the one where dream sucks as a parental figure, tommy runs away, and visits his least favorite family member technoblade

Hard-hitting, but has a happy ending, though I recommend reading the prequel (in the same series) first, otherwise, it's lowkey depressing.

MORE RECOMMENDATIONS BELOW THE CUT!!

you’ll rise above (crowned by an overture bold and beyond) by azvremoon

Tommy is not sixteen. He has faced too many open wounds, dripping ichor onto blood-stained warzones, to be just a child. He is Blood and War and needless Death, an all-in-one special of everything that can ruin reality.

(Tommy is the blood god. No one should know, but this server can't stop pushing him over the edge.)

+2 more Works that were Inspired by this one

Tommy is a BAMF and Dream, Technblade, and Phil get fucked it is what it is.

Responsible Forever by SilverWing15

“You become responsible, forever, for what you have tamed.” /////

“So,” Techoblade says, slow and deliberate, his face shows clearly just how unbelievable he finds all of this, “you saw a boy last night, in the middle of the night, living with raccoons and eating our garbage?”

“I know how insane it sounds,” Phil says, “but I know what I saw. We need to help him, who knows how long he’s been out here?”

“Okay,” Wilbur interrupts, “let’s say that raccoon-boy is real. What is it you want us to do? We can’t go searching the woods for specific bunch of raccoons, I don’t know if you’ve noticed Phil but there are a lot of them out there.”

“Going out and hunting him isn’t going to get us anywhere,” Techno says, “we have to let the raccoon-boy come to us. He’s already come once, you know how tenacious raccoons are. If they came to the garbage pit once, they’ll come again. We just have to set a trap.”

“Those raccoons aren’t gonna know what fucking hit them,” Wilbur mutters.

Or: RaccoonInnit taken well beyond its logical conclusion

Tommyinnit is a Raccoon boi that lives with other Raccoons

Protecting the Traumatised Youth by spookyserpent

Sam blinks. “What?”

Even behind the mask, Sam has the distinct impression that Dream is grinning at him. “A week and he was begging for my attention, even after I stole and burnt his armour, even after the beatings. He couldn’t stand me leaving him because I was the only one to show up, to pay him attention. It was hilarious.”

Sam is going to be sick.

Or, Sam decides to ask Dream about his intentions and ends up becoming a big brother to Tommy and Tubbo. All the while, Dream and George fight, Niki and Jack plan child murder and Ranboo is slowly getting adopted into the SBI.

Awesamdad written back when it was possible... ahhh

Chaos In a Bottle by Lovetribable

After a realization, Tommy leaves the pillar, but instead of going to Techno. He just disappears, leaving everyone to think he's gone.

It takes a war to bring him back.

+2 Sequels and an Alternative Ending

Dadinnit!! + A Sympathetic Dream

Absolutely Anything For Them by Numanum

“There’s a lot you don’t understand, Tubbo,” Dream sighs, meeting his eyes cooly. Tubbo, back against a tree, shudders at his tone, at the look on his face.

The sword at his neck skims across his skin as Dream shifts his grip on it, and he flinches back into the rough bark behind him. Dream smiles at his reaction, seeming pleased- like the cat that’s been toying with a mouse that always tries to run no matter how many times it’s caught. And, despite this being his first encounter alone with the man, he thinks that the comparison is fairly accurate; Tubbo has never felt smaller than he does now. There’s supposed to be a buddy system to prevent things like this- he shouldn’t be alone here, stuck in this situation.

Or: Tubbo becomes a traitor to save everyone and has to struggle with his choices

Traitor Tubbo, but it has the happiest ending possible since it follows the rest of the story.

Where Did You Come From, Kit? by KadeAK (zacixn)

Hybrids are an ancient species of humans crossed with animals, blessed with the favour of nature. They used to live in peace on the SMP’s land, but ever since the dawn of humanity’s modern culture, they have become ostracised and hunted by their once-brethren. Now, the once-thriving subspecies of hybrids have been reduced to ashes, the majority of their peoples struggling to survive in a city capital that can't stand their presence.

To the members of L’Manburg, General Wilbur Soot is just another mildly prejudiced human being, stuck with a hybrid fox kit for an adopted child. However, that assumption could not be farther from the truth. As it turns out, there's a reason why he is the man he is today.

This fic is entirely pre-L’Manburg.

Part of a series, very good.

Take It Easy by sweet_magnolias

Five times Techno scared Michael, one time Michael scared him, and the resolution of those fears.

AKA - Techno learns how to be an uncle.

Technoblade's POV, so expect some Tubbo bashing on the margins of all that Michael fluff.

I suppose it’s never my time to die, is it? by Birb_Whale

The first time it happens, he barely remembers. The second time is when he realized. The third... Twice is a coincidence, three times is a pattern

“It’s not your time to die yet, Tommy”

Messed up, but not unrealistic. Purely for the Hurt/Comfort lovers.

This Wasn't Planned, But It'll Work Out by Anonymous

Dream isn't sure what to think when he finds a kid on his doorstep, but he can't just leave him there, now can he?

(He doesn't know what he's getting into, or what he's gotten the kid into, either)

Long, and angsty, with a bittersweet ending Imo.

let's play a game by Aria_Cinabun

Tommy was once a slave. That's gone now - shoved in his past with the memories of blood and gore and death. He wants to forget who he was; what he has to do to survive. Of course, the Elementalists will always come back to haunt him. They aren't the ones who killed his mother, but they're close enough. And now he and his brother have been dragged into the mess, as Elementalists with their own, separate covens, to find the Pit - the place where he'd lived and killed and hurt for the first twelve years of his life. His coven can't know. Can't know who he really is, what he can really do. Can't know anything about his past. He doesn't want a coven full of Elementalists who don't trust him; one of whom he's pretty sure despises him. He doesn't want that life. He wants the life of a pickpocket, on the streets, because nobody questions street kids, and nobody comes asking about his past and pushes him to tell his secrets that he holds closest inside. Tubbo tries to tell him to trust people. But trust is how you die.

Good fantasy AU, has SBI, and is thus fluffy.

Turn of the Tide by SilverWing15

Tommy’s fins twitch at the mention of Dream’s ancestors. Dream talks about them a lot, how they made their fortune hunting down mer pods, how they were cruel and greedy. Nothing like Dream is. They’ve both overcome their roots he says.

Tommy is nothing like the wild mer out in the ocean, who spend their lives scraping by just to survive, who kicked him out of the pod when he was a baby because he was too small. He’s also better than the pit mer, who can’t overcome their wild instincts and know nothing but fighting.

He’s different from them, he’s better than them. He’s Dream’s. //// OR: Change is like the tide, when it comes, you can only sink or swim. You would think that a mer would be better at keeping afloat.

Mermaid AU Pooog. Part of a series.

One-Shots:

Snapped by AmberRunnel

“You don’t know what I went through in that prison cell.”

Jack burst out laughing, blinded with rage and the overwhelming urge to hurt Tommy, to give him everything he deserved. “Oh, is the poor child traumatized? You want pity now?” He twisted his blade, and Tommy’s axe was sent clattering to the ground.

“If the prison was so awful, why don’t I send you back there?”

-|-

Jack doesn't handle Tommy's revival well. There's a simple solution, though. Kill Tommy, and Dream revives him right back into that cell. Problem solved, kid dealt with.

It takes a few confrontations for Jack to realize he's an asshole.

It's fucked up, but god does it hurt in a good way.

the sky is coming down blue by salinesolution

An imagining of New Milo's perspective throughout the Skyblock Randomizer adventure. What did he think of the world he found himself in, and how did Wilbur's feelings and actions change things for him? Here's my way of answering those questions.

He made the fish think, funniest shit I've seen.

You told me to be a hero (so let me die like one) by spiromachia

"You told me to die like a hero," the blond interrupted, spinning on his heel to face the others, holding his arms wide open, "So why not fulfil the ending that was always meant to be."

Across the battle field, through the chaos and destruction, a tree burned.

Even the sound of explosions and cries and bloodshed felt distant enough for the world to become silent for a few moments, each individual slowly coming to the same conclusion, each of their bodies tensing.

Tommy's face broke out into a grin as he lowered his head, glowering at the people around him, and Philza's face flashed with recognition.

"Kill me."

Or... In the middle of Doomsday, Tommy decides to ask Technoblade to be the Lycomedes to his Theseus.

Heavy and dark, but at least Dream gets it.

tomorrow night by meridies

Tommy is desperately searching for his missing brother. Techno is the reluctant psychic who unfortunately got dragged along.

or, two people, more alike than different, learn what it is to have a family at their side.

It's cute what can I say :]

maple syrup by itisjosh

"We could run," Tubbo stares at the sun. "We've got everything we've ever wanted right here. We could run."

"Yeah," Tommy agrees, feeling his head swim. "We could."

(or, tommy and tubbo run away together)

Children get away from toxic adults :)

Why’d it have to be so sunny? (The sun shouldn’t shine without you.) by AToZRainToBe

‘A realisation hits Phil in the face like a truck. “Wi- Ghostbur,” Phil says, turning to his grey-scale, translucent, actually-dead son. “You definitely told Tubbo that Tommy’s alive, right?”’

To get away from Dream, Tommy agrees to fake his death, going with the cover story that he jumped from the pillar in Logstedshire. Unfortunately, someone forgot to tell Tubbo.

Misunderstandings are one of my favorite tropes.

sugar and ice by princedemeter for Aenqa

“He is my son,” Philza says. “Mortal or not, I would see him grow strong.”

Technoblade looks down on earth, at the tiny, angry bundle of cloth and pinking, wrinkled skin. This mortal child, he thinks, lungs filled with breath from the king of gods himself, will not grow strong.

It's mostly centered around Technoblade and Wilbur with Phil being a shitty dad. Pog Gods AU.

a matter of time by meridies

Tommy is twelve years old when his wings first appear, and he is twelve years old when Phil tells him, "All it takes is time and patience, Tommy, and soon you'll be flying even better than me."

or, Tommy grows up feeling like a failure, and it takes him a while to figure out where he's happiest.

Tommy is just finding his place in the world. Powers AU.

That Time a Baby Decided to Raise a Baby by Scitrust

Tubbo wasn't good at making excuses, so when Schlatt asked him why he was leaving in the night, he made something up on the spot. That had been months ago.

At least he sort of had an alibi for that, now.

Or, in which Tubbo finds a baby in the woods on his way to see Tommy, and promptly adopts it.

Part of a collection!! Read it all.

spider lily by blue000jay

Wilbur has a body.

The freckle on the base of his left pinky finger (shared with Techno). The scar on his chin from when he was twelve and over ambitious, diving into too-shallow water. The scar on his throat from the final control room, and the puckered skin on his shoulder from the poisoned arrow that killed him next. Various other nicks and things that litter his skin from years of rebellion and living wild, a kid thrown into a vicious world with too little self-preservation.

(Resurrection AU, for when/if Wilbur comes back.)

The author knows how it's like to live with chronic pain, and it shows :(

Hands tied loose by rabiddog

"Let's run away, Tubbo." Tommy breathed; a wide grin split across his face as his hope grew. "Let's get out of here – far away. We can go anywhere, can't we? Let's just go, you and me right here, right now."

-

Tommy needs to leave. He has to get out of L'Manburg, he has to leave the Dream SMP for his own sanity, and he wants Tubbo to come with him.

But Tubbo has a family now, a better life - something that he can't give up... not even for his best friend.

Unhappy ending :(

The serpent underneath by rabiddog

Tommy and Techno sit at the memory-filled bench and talk. Technoblade reminisces, he talks, he admits his pent-up feelings, he cries. And Tommy? Tommy listens. (That's all he can do.)

-

“I’m sorry for everything, you know? For all of it. I’m so sorry about... about the first war, about the withers and the fighting, about...” Technoblade's fingers began to curl around Tommy’s blonde locks. “About Wilbur and everything after. I'm so, so sorry.”

:((((((((

Damning choices by rabiddog

Ranboo would have never expected to find himself in a horrifying situation such as that one - quite literally sandwiched between a rock and a hard place, with three lives dangling over his head and the answer on the tip of his tongue.

Tubbo, Michael, Tommy.

It's his choice. He chooses who lives, and who dies. His new family, or his first friend. But Ranboo... Ranboo already knows.

-

"Ranboo," He hissed out, voice cracking and somewhat staticky, "It's not your fault. It's not. You had no other choice; I know that, okay? I- I know that- I know- I know..."

:(((((((((((((((((((((((((((

Jealousy is a disease by rabiddog

Tommyinnit isn't new to the idea of jealousy. He understands it completely. He understands the way it runs rampage through his body each time he catches even a glimpse of Tubbo and Ranboo's new relationship, he understands that the emotion makes his heart clench uncomfortably from time to time. He sees it, feels it, and yet he doesn't care.

He doesn't care at all.

-

"You took Tubbo away from me. You took him away. You took my best friend, and now he's- now he's not my best friend anymore, and I-!"

:)

Word of Honour by rabiddog

Tommy could only stand and stare as Technoblade agreed to hand him over to Dream - as his brother traded him off like he was nothing. Like Tommy wasn't important.

-

Technoblade was a man of honour. He was a man of pride and sticking to his word. He knew that he owed Dream a favour, and no matter what that favour might be, he'd be compliant with it. Nothing would change his mind. (Not even Tommy.)

Almost canon. F.

Sweet Repentance by rabiddog

Perhaps Tommy should have told Phil about his arguably life-threatening injury the minute his father had opened the door. But of course, Tommy being Tommy, did not.

Dying seemed like a nice enough option as long as he was with his family.

-

Tommy just wanted acceptance, forgiveness, and peace. He wanted to close his eyes for the last time and finally be able to let go.

Tommy dies painfully.

A White Tulip by astervoid

He picked the white tulip from the bottom of the stem, standing up carefully as he held it pinched between his fingers. It would die now, inevitably, but Tommy relented and held the flower to his chest. What a silly, stupid thing to ground him. He almost hated that it made his breaths come easier and his steps feel lighter. Almost.

Tommy & Ranbooo chill on the bench.

lying to the authorities (again) by touchgrass

"Please tell me that my right-hand-man, my soon-to-be vice president, one of the people I trust the most on this godforsaken server, did not lie straight to my face and tell me he was twenty-fucking-years-old.”

Tommy opened his mouth to protest, but then closes it shut at the furious look on Wilbur's face. Oops.

~

It is the day of the elections and Wilbur Soot could not have chosen a worser time to realize that half his staff is underage.

The ONLY fic with this premise I've seen on Ao3.

Dear Theseus by rabiddog

Tommy had thought that they'd won - thought that they'd finally beaten Dream, and that everything would be okay. As it turns out, however, apparently Dream had called in that favour from Technoblade after all.

-

“Please,” Tommy whispered after a beat, quivering hands edged upwards to hesitantly press against the tip of the sword striking through his chest. Why, why, why? Why him? Why now?

Tommy almost wins.

A Shifting World by AplusIsRoman

How was Wilbur supposed to know it would end like this?

The smoke hung in the air and soot clung to his skin. His brother - adopted, but older by two minutes - stood back-to-back with him. The chilling cries of people and the calls of the withers rang through the air above the chasm that was once his home.

This wasn’t supposed to happen.

How could he have known this would happen?

-

Sequel to A Child's World

Age-swap AU. Has a prequel.

heart of the sea by RyDyKG

Here is the secret that he barely thinks about, a secret that he shoves deep and far down in himself:

Wilbur Soot is a siren, and he’s not exactly proud of that fact.

Wilbur-centric. Urban Fantasy AU.

He knows, ok? by Ralli

By some means, Techno has given his raccoon younger brother some cotton candy. It doesn’t end as well as either of them would like.

Very, very cute :)

that's it, it's split (it won't recover) by Jk_Kat

Tommy has always been the fighter.

He has never been the fought for, and he knows it, with every whisper Tubbo directs at Ranboo, with every glance thrown his way- Tommy knows, the way he wishes he didn't, that they think he's dead.

If they're so convinced he's still dead, maybe the one good thing left he can do for them is die.

---

Or, Tommy gets addicted to being dead and thinks that nobody cares about him. The people who very much do try to pull him back from the brink before Dream can't resurrect him anymore.

Messed up, but with a happy ending.

Hugs 'n PTSD by rabiddog

Ranboo knew from the start that the recovery process would be hard - that moving on from quite literally being beat to death would be something hugely difficult to step away from, and that's if Tommy could even manage it at all.

He knew that it would be stressful and arduous, demanding and tough... he just hadn't expected to be holding Tommy through a PTSD-induced panic attack only days after his release from Pandora's Vault.

-

Ranboo isn't typically an overbearingly protective person. But for Tommy? He just might be.

I love this author if you can't tell.

Big Men don't cry by Shiny22Snivy

The room is small and warm, almost stifling compared to the cool openness of the ravine. It’s cosy and candlelit, and a chest sits open in the corner, full of what looks to be burnt rags of a former smart suit. And sitting in rumpled blankets on a bed, cradling a mug of something steaming, sits Tubbo.

At first, Tommy forgets all about Niki’s vague warning. He’s just so happy to see his best friend again, alive and well and all in one piece. Tubbo’s okay. Tubbo’s okay, and in front of him, and suddenly everything bad in the world is gone, if only for just a moment.

“Tommy?”

And then Tubbo turns to look at him.

Clingyduo fluff.

sins of the father (i broke all my bones that day i found you) by ryter

The thing that hurt Wilbur most was when he saw Fundy tear down the walls of L'Manburg. After all, those walls had gone up to protect his son. But in this world, Fundy trusts his father just a little bit more, and it ruins him.

Or: there's only one way Wilbur never becomes the villain. It's unclear whether this was the better path.

SOME VIOLENCE WARNINGS/BLOOD MENTION. CHARACTER DEATH. SO MUCH ANGST.

Sad, but cathartic.

REVIVED TOMMY HEADCANNONS AHAHAHAHA by racooninnit

i’m dropping ALL the fucking revived tommy headcannons on you guys today get ready for some ANGST

this is different from what i usually post but it was fun

i don’t think there’s a lot i need to put warnings for, obviously there are mentions of the way tommy died and the aftermath of that (i.e. injuries and trauma), but if there’s anything that needs a warning please tell me!

What it says on the tin- not really a fic.

Unfinished Stories:

Ongoing (Less than a month since the last update):

Over the River Styx by CorpseArt

I feel like we should name him.

There’s a scuffle at the back of his mind as he rolls up, curling tight with a shiver despite the heat of the flames licking up his back.

I mean, he’s like – us, but like a worse version clearly because oh man, this is just weirdness. There’s a flare of a tangle of emotions, complicated and fearful, resentful and livid with anger. I can’t believe this is what I’ve been reduced to, stuck in the mind of this- this child.

He’s like your age, Tommy. Are you calling yourself a child?

I mean, I am one so fucking duh. Child murderer.

-

Or: trauma bonding in the most unconventional of senses.

Just- Read it. Show the writer your support, it's unique, it's amazing and there needs to be more of it.

If history is dead and gone by iregretallmydecisions

“Don’t come any fucking closer,” Tommy shouted, startling Phil into stepping back. Tommy was still looking around wildly, like a trapped animal “Don’t fucking do it.” ---- In which Tommy finds himself faced with his splintered family, while it was still mostly whole. The past is not an easy place to be when the future was not kind. His family is forced to deal with the fall out.

It's better than Rewind, but you didn't hear that from me.

Wilbur Soot's Redemption (OR Ghostbur's Retry) by luckykitty0523

Wilbur had many regrets in his life, being lost in his madness and the urge for revenge drowned leaving a shell of who he once was. It was only in his dying moments that he regained himself but it was already too late for him leaving him drowning in wishes and regrets. However waking up in another different universe where wilbur was never born and family soulmates exist, so when wilbur said he wanted to fix the mistakes he never expected this turn of events.

OR

In one world wilbur dies and he would return as a ghost missing his memory and trying to fix what he did in life but in this one wilbur dies and wakes up in another world where soulmates exist and the wilbur of that world was never born so wilbur/ghostbur takes his place and tries to make up his mistakes to the other version of his friends.

Wilbur adopts SBI + Fundy + Dream.

A Talk Long Overdue by penink

Tommy has his first therapy session with Puffy.

Tommy gets therapy.

Into the Night by Interjection

“Don’t touch me,” Tommy hisses, leaning against the railing. “I will - I will-”

They’re a hundred stories up. Wind lashes against Phil’s face. Next to him, Sam makes choked noise.

“But why?”

Tommy looks up to meet Phil’s eyes, terror struck so deep in those pale blue irises Phil thinks they must hold all the world’s fears within them.

“You’ll die,” he whispers. “And then I’ll die. But I’ll come back.”

“And I don’t want to come back.”

Others have the freedom to live. Tommy doesn’t even have the freedom to die.

But maybe they can teach him that living doesn’t have to be so bad.

---

(Superpowers AU where whenever someone touches Tommy, they both die. But Tommy will always come back to life eventually. He just wants it to end - but instead, he’s on the run, terrified of how his power will be exploited if he’s caught.

A few people reluctantly team up to save him.)

Funky SBI dynamics + a Sam that cares. Also a lot of angst.

[scripttorture]

You mention in posts how torture doesn’t make people obedient and usually makes them spiteful (which obviously makes sense), but isn’t it realistic for someone to comply out of fear rather than loyalty? Whether that was giving up information or obeying orders or something else entirely. I imagine it depends on the person, and they would probably still be willing to turn on their torturers if given the chance, but would it be possible for them to obey orders in hopes of avoiding more pain?

This is a much more nuanced and complicated topic then we’re taught to assume.

 When it comes to giving up information it’s pretty clear cut. No, torture can’t lead to accurate information for a lot of interconnected reasons. I have about six separate masterposts covering the reasons for this.

 One of those is the antagonism torture produces. Another is the memory problems torture causes. Another is the effect that the use of torture has on organisations and the chain of command. Another is the effect torture has on torturers.

 Torture drastically increases the chances of memory loss and it also increases the chances of inaccurate memories. So not only is a torture victim less likely to talk, they’re more likely to be wrong if they do talk.

 But the effects on victims aren’t the main reason torture doesn’t work as a way of getting information. You’re assuming that torturers have access to people who have information.

 The reality is that torture destroys an organisation’s ability to gather accurate information. Most information comes from volunteers: when torture comes into play less people volunteer information. This means that an organisation which tortures is more likely to be questioning someone who knows nothing. That person is then abused until they start making things up.

 Because there’s less access to volunteered information and because humans are very bad at telling when someone is lying, a lot of these made up stories are believed. And this then effects who else the organisation arrests and tortures. This creates a sort of spiral, with lies leading to more lies.

 Additionally the torturers themselves make things worse. There’s less quality research on them, but the research and anecdotal accounts create a pretty clear picture of their behaviour. They undermine the chain of command, they lose the skills the originally had as they turn to torture, they’re aggressive, incredibly competitive and they have a… fracturing effect on their organisation.

 Basically they’re incredibly difficult to work with and totally convinced of their own importance. And this effects their colleagues. It totally divides organisations. The worst case I’ve read about involved members of the same organisation killing each other over access to prisoners.

 That’s a short run through of the main factors. Torture, in the legally defined sense, means all of these factors are in play. Plus a few more I’ve omitted to keep this shorter.

 With all of that together you just can’t get accurate information.

 If you want longer posts I’ve made on the subject I suggest looking for the ‘torture doesn’t work’ tag and the ‘torture as interrogation’ tag. You can also read the masterposts. If you want a much more in depth look at why torture consistently fails as a way of getting information I recommend O’Mara’s Why Torture Doesn’t Work and Rejali’s Torture and Democracy.

 O’Mara is a neuroscientist and goes through the effects torture has on the brain in a way that’s accessible, explaining the damage torture causes and how that destroys the evidence torturers claim to be seeking. Rejali’s book is a breeze block but it’s really a must, it is the textbook on torture in a broad sense. He ties together information from across the globe creating a broader picture of what torture does, not just to victims but to societies.

 The question of compliance under threat and pain… is more complicated.

 People can be forced to do some things. That much is obvious from a brief glance at human history and things like slavery. But it’s important to listen to what people in these scenarios say.

 And my opinion, based on what I’ve read, is that what these people say doesn’t support the idea that humans will easily obey instructions when they’re hurt or threatened. I think instead these people are making hard headed, rational choices in absolutely awful situations. I think when we don’t have these experiences of torture or slavery, it’s easy to look at the surface of the situation and assume that pain alone assures obedience. I think that happens because it’s hard for use to understand the rationale when we don’t have that lived experience.

 Let me give some examples. So it probably goes without saying that slavery goes hand in hand with physical abuse. One of the major researchers on slavery, whose data I quote pretty regularly, assumes throughout his writings that pain is the deciding factor which ‘makes’ people obey.

 But he also describes a couple of very obvious consistent patterns in the ways slavers behave. Slavers almost universally do the following things as well as using physical abuse:

Separate enslaved people from their community

Bar enslaved people from other forms of support

Make enslaved people financially/materially reliant on the slavers

Tell enslaved people that going to the police/authorities will lead to the enslaved person being arrested

Try to convince enslaved people that they will be better off if they comply, usually by framing it as a debt to be worked off with promises of riches after a period of time

 Now here’s the thing: we know from studies on cults and studies on ICURE techniques that a lot of these strategies will result in obedience when there is no violence or physical abuse.

 Given that I don’t think we can assume that violence is the deciding factor. In fact I think the evidence we have from forced confessions under torture suggests the violence may lead to less obedience and a lower ‘success’ rate then a set up that used emotional abuse or other exploitative techniques without violence.

 We have two sources of historical data that are used for statistical studies on forced confessions. One is from historical France. We think that this data set only involved torture to force a confession; no other method of coercion just violence. The rate of forced confessions varied a little in different areas but over all it’s about 10%. The second data set is from the ‘London Cage’ a British prison during the second world war. Here we know that torture was combined with blackmail, bribery and other kinds of coercion. The rate of forced confessions there was about 30%.

 And while this is just two studies, while the data is lacking… That is one hell of a jump.

 Let’s circle back to ICURE. ICURE stands for Isolation, Control information, create Uncertainty, Repetition and Emotive responses. It’s a set of techniques which can, sometimes, change someone’s beliefs when it’s applied consistently over a long time.

 Notice the effort slavers put in to isolating their victims. Notice that the behaviour pattern I’m describing means the slavers are creating uncertainty over seeking help and repeating those messages as well as messages that the victims will be better off if they just go along with it.

 Slavers will generally also try to control the information their victims have access to, taking phones and blocking access to news sources and other resources. Now a lot of slavers will transport their victims to other states or countries putting a language barrier in place. They sometimes also use emotive responses in attempts to persuade victims to comply.

 I’ve read multiple accounts where survivors of modern slavery described slavers telling them that the money they were making was being sent to the victim’s family and without it the family would not survive. (Sometimes the slavers do send small amounts to the families of their victims, sometimes they pocket everything.) I’ve also read accounts where gangs of slavers used religion and oaths taken in a religious setting to persuade their victims they’d be punished by God for not complying.

 Even with all of this, all these techniques we know can sometimes ‘work’- lots of people refuse. Lots of people disobey. Lots of people escape. Lots of people actively sabotage the operations the slavers put together.

 And if you look at that same history of slavery, that shows us people can sometimes be forced to work, you’ll see that this has always been true.

 We have records of historic enslaved people attacking slavers, forming organised militias, forming parallel societies, sacking towns, taking over an entire Caribbean island and beating off four European armies in the process. We also have records of smaller acts. Sabotage, worship of banned deities, speaking banned languages, destruction of property, aiding in the escape of others.

 What I’m saying is: this isn’t black and white. The evidence, modern and historical does not paint a clear picture of violence leading to obedience.

 Instead I believe that it shows humans are resilient, stubborn, adaptable creatures. People can survive all kinds of horrible situations. It is more accurate, more human, to assume that people make rational choices.

 Sometimes those choices involve short term compliance while looking for a better option or a way out. But we tend to hear less stories about the people who completely refuse to comply. We tend to treat that as an impossible fiction when it is a recorded historical and modern reality.

 Bringing this back to writing as a general rule the more complicated the act the less likely you can force someone to do it. Because the more complicated it is the more opportunities they’ll have to sabotage it or use it against their abuser.

 I recommend reading up on the history of Haiti pet. Then Brazil via Palmares.

 I’ll end this by bringing it back to those statistics on forced confessions in historical France. Imagine the conditions with me for a moment. Unsanitary, cramped cells. Dehydration, starvation and disease. Plus the kinds of scarring torture that are conjured up in the minds of most Western people when the word ‘torture’ comes up; thumb screws, leg irons that tighten until the bone snaps, whips.

 Picture it. Try to imagine the pain those people went through.

 And remember that 90% of them did not comply long enough to sign their name.

Available on Wordpress.

Disclaimer

[wolfanddragon98]

Me and My 2AM Thoughts...

Okay guys. Hear me out and my dramatic ass brain that is constantly thinking about the ‘what if’ scenarios for Hear You, Seek You. Imagine if Billy and Stu were caught by the police in the final act. How much would their arrest affect the plot?

They would most likely be treated as adults at the trial and ultimately sentenced to death (I think we talked about this before) just like Cotton was. One might say that Billy’s dad could help them out, considering that he’s a lawyer and probably has some good connections to some great defence attorneys but let’s be real, I doubt Hank would have his son’s back after hearing about that atrocities that he and his friend have committed. Would he feel guilty considering that Billy killed, due to Hank’s infidelity that caused his mother to leave them? I’m sure he would. But would he support him? Personally, I don’t see it happening.

Them going for the insanity plea would be totally useless, given the fact that their murders were clearly well thought out and premeditated. Death sentence is simply inevitable. But let’s be real some criminals wait years and I mean YEARS for their execution when they’re on the death row. So if we’re being logical they would still live a relatively long life behind bars, which means that they would most likely live to see (or rather hear) about the copycat murders. What would they think about them? Would Mrs. Loomis still go after Sidney, Randy and Scarlett? Her sole reason for coming after the survivors of the Woodsboro Massacre in the first place was because she lost her son. So…would this still apply in this scenario? Would she go after them because in her eyes they have ruined his son’s future and now he’s wasting away in prison? If Windsor College murders are still a go how would Billy react to his mother’s death? What about Roman? Would he risk making his own murder spree trilogy? Billy knows that he exists, so wouldn’t he be afraid that he would spill the beans to the police? He’s sentenced with Stu to be executed and therefore he has nothing to lose. In fact, it’s plausible that Billy would think that by ratting him out to the police he could gain something valuable. Maybe information about Scarlett whereabouts, perhaps longer visitation hours with his mother (total momma’s boy) or simply a better treatment in prison.

Am I also insane for wanting a girl-boss moment with Scarlett where she visits them in prison years after the murders? It would be a symbolic way of her finally closing the chapter. She visits them days prior to their executions (maybe Randy and Sidney are there too for their own reasons), looks them straight in the eye and tells them that while they wasted their years in confined cells, she thrived and will continue to thrive.

Would Sam find the strength to visit her father (to face her inner demons)? Would Billy even entertain the idea of her visitations? I doubt Hank would visit him, Mrs. Loomis would see him 100% but who does he have left if she dies? Christina? Would she tell him that they have a kid together? What about Stu’s family? Would he be cut off from them completely? He has a nephew doesn’t he? How would he react to Vince’s death? Would he think that he’s to some extent responsible, considering that the killings have started with him and Billy? Would there be any guilt?

I also have this crazy thought that Jamie and Wes could have possibly visited them without Scarlett and Randy knowing about it in the newest Scream. Maybe when the murders are taking place again Jamie tells Wes that perhaps it would be a good idea to talk to the original killers because they could have some theories in regards to who might be the new killer(s). Wes would probably think that it’s not the best idea (what can I see he’s worried for Jamie’s safety), but knowing Jamie’s stubborn nature she wouldn’t let it go, so he would go with her because he would hate the idea of Jamie being in the presence of convicted killers (even if they’re separated by a glass wall). How would Billy and Stu react to the fact that Scarlett and Randy’s daughter is visiting them? They probably heard that they have a daughter but would they be able to tell that it’s actually her? Would they try to help or would the trip be useless? Knowing Billy he would probably try to drag things along (because he’d be curious of Jamie and would want to spend as much time with her) and would leave things on a cliffhanger so Jamie and Wes would have no choice but to visit them again.

And...that is it for now. I swear I’m not on any drugs. It’s just that whenever I read a story my mind is coming up with thousands of different scenarios of ‘what ifs’. Anyway thank you for listening to my TED talk and I would love to hear what you guys think. xx

[zemodaddy]

Hey so i finally completed the first chapter of the zemo x reader fanfic. Make sure to read the authors note at the end and i hope you enjoy.!

Synopsis:

Y/n is an ex-avenger who, after the blip was forced to work for the US government. You trained to be an assassin/spy and your gifts of wielding flames made you invaluable. When you were assigned to follow Bucky you find him helping Helmut Zemo escape from his prison cell. What is he up to? Should you stop him?

Warnings: violence, lots of swearing, angst, fluff and in later chapters extreme acts of hatred towards John Walker :)

Shades of Him

They replaced him. They replaced him with a random guy and stuck Steve’s shield on him. You were staring at the TV in disbelief. You thought of Steve like a brother and he definitely wouldn’t have wanted this.

After the blip you had no job, the avengers pretty much all separated and that left you without anything to do, and that meant no income and no income meant no home or food. You couldn’t exactly find a normal job because most people were afraid of you. A trained assassin and spy who could wield flames wasn’t really considered normal. That left you with no choice but to accept the deal the US government offered you. Do their dirty work and you wont end up homeless.

Your newest mission was to track Bucky to make sure he followed the rules set upon him for his pardon. You are close to him, like you were close to Steve. Hiding the fact that you were following him everywhere he went was kind of hard but you managed. You had to manage.

So finding him and Sam visiting a German prison kind of surprised you. Had this got to do with his therapy? Surely not. They left around an hour later and from then nothing more suspicious happened. A quick google search and a deep dive into some public records showed that a high security prisoner resided at this prison. Not just anyone. Zemo.

Interesting you thought. Later that night you followed Bucky and Sam to an old garage. You waited outside for 5 minutes before entering, trying to keep to the shadows of the room. The two men seemed to be in the midst of a heated discussion. “You want Zemo to help us?” Sam looks exasperated. Bucky looks a bit apprehensive as he says “Look let me walk you through a hypothetical, can I do that?” He begins to explain an elaborate escape plan for Zemo. Your mind was wizzing with thoughts as you tried to figure out your next move. He really isn’t in the right headspace, same old Bucky, you roll your eyes. “What are you guys doing?” You step out of the darkness. The two seemed to jump out of their skin, clearly not expecting you to be there.

“Y/n? What are you doing here?” Bucky asks. They both looked so shocked by your sudden appearance that you had to suppress a laugh. “I was following you.” He doesn’t look happy. “YOU WERE FOLLOWING ME?” He raises his voice. You weren’t scared because you knew he loved you really. Keeping the same tone as him you shout back “YES AND YOU’RE HELPING A CRIMINAL” “I SAID HYPOTHETICALLY DIDN’T I”. Sam looks like he could start laughing any moment. You weren’t even sure if you should laugh or arrest them. Suddenly your phone buzzes. “Then please explain to me why I just got a message saying that ZEMO HAS ESCAPED FROM PRISON?” Sam looks mad now. “You’re kidding me Bucky” he says. “Look we don’t have any other leads, we were at a dead end.”

You knew that the two were looking for information on the new super soldiers serum. “He blew up the UN, he killed king T’Chaka!” Before Bucky could reply to Sams argument, the sound of a door shutting sounds through the garage and guess who walks in. Helmut fucking Zemo. Your hand flies immediately to the dagger on the side of your thigh. “Woah woah woah” Sam starts walking towards him as Bucky tries to hold him back. Too bad he didn’t see you slip past them and push Zemo against the wall with said dagger against his throat. “Your going back to prison” you pass him a sickly sweet smile. He looked surprised by you holding him against that wall but didn’t fight back. Not with the blade in your hand starting to heat up against his skin. “y/n let him go” Bucky looks frustrated.

“He can lead us closer to the serum, just let him breath for a second” Zemo did start to look a little breathless. Good, he should be scared of you. Reluctantly you let him go. He starts to talk “if I may”. At the same time the three of you go “NO”. He looked a little displeased by the response but didn’t have any other option but to oblige. “Apologies”. After further debating and a lot of disagreements you and Sam finally agree to trust Zemo.. for the time being anyways. “Alright Zemo, where do we start”

You mentally set a reminder to always have an eye on Zemo, how could you not with a guy like him. He seemed to be sending you anxious glances in return, which to be fair you did nearly choke him to death. He leads you to a large warehouse containing numerous cars of different ages, sizes and colours. Probably stolen you think. After grabbing a case full with clothes for zemo you all head to an airstrip. In the middle of which was a private jet. You look at it in awe. “So you were rich all this time?” Sam asks. “I’m a baron Sam, my family was royalty before your friends destroyed my country”. Shit. Those cars weren’t stolen then..

The mention of his country makes you think back to that battle against ultron. You were very tempted to leave the avengers after nearly wiping out the entirety of a population of a country. But they convinced you to stay, where else could you have gone anyway? You think a little longer about the aftermath, when you helped after the battle with the injured, and loved ones finding their dead. It was one of the saddest moment of your life, until the blip. No one else helped from the avengers, they didn’t even visit the memorial..

“Y/n you coming?” Sam was saying from the top of the stairs. Lost in thought you were stood in front of the plane. Maybe I should stop getting distracted you thought. Entering the jet the seats on the right were already occupied by Sam and Bucky, leaving the only other seat opposite Zemo free. Great. As a gentle reminder you check your dagger on your thigh, almost like a warning that if he tries anything he’ll know what’s coming. Zemo swallows looking where it would be and ask his butler person for a drink. Was that his butler or the pilot? Rich people problems you thought. The plane sets off and you look out of the window daydreaming a little.

The other three talk lightly until the mention of Buckys list, which ends in zemo being choked yet again. You smile a little, enjoying the mini acts of revenge for the people he’s hurt and killed. You feel a bit sleepy but then they start to discuss where you were going. “Do we want to live in a world full of people like the red skull” Zemo shakes his head lightly “that’s why we’re going to Madripoor”. Confused, Bucky explains the place’s history in the Indonesian archipelago. “It’s kept its lawless ways but we cannot go in as our selves” Zemo says. Uh oh that can’t be good.

You were right. Zemo had handed you a bag full of clothes and a pair of heels. You stared at yourself in the full length mirror that resided in the toilets. “You have got to be kidding me” you say aloud. Your were wearing a dark purple silky dress that reached only just halfway down your thigh. It exposed most of your arms, shoulders and a lot of your chest. Thankfully there was a black leather jacket in the bag too, however on the shoulders sat a blanket of fur, similarly to Zemos coat that he took from the warehouse. Your heels were also purple. You thank the lord you took the time to train in heels too because you never know when the situation arises when you happen to find yourself in those monstrous shoes.

“This” you point at yourself “is not happening”. “Ah my baroness has arrived” Zemo says, amusement glinting in his eyes. You glared at the word ‘baroness’. “Here put this on darling, to finish it off��. He holds what seems to be a lipstick in his hand. You already knew what shade it was before taking it from him. “Do you have some thing for purple or is that just me?” Sam and Bucky both laughed.

You had to admit, the dress didn’t look bad, in fact it looked expensive. To say you were uncomfortable was an understatement, not necessarily for what you were wearing, but for the hand now draped around your waist. Zemos hand. He said that no matter what, you couldn’t break character. Bucky was playing the role as the winter soldier; you felt bad for him, the memories this must bring up. You can’t even begin to imagine. Sam however, wore an extravagant and abstract red suit that kind of looked like a dress. It was funny to see his reaction to which he comments that he looked like a “pimp”.

A car pulls up beside you and you all pile in. Of course you were sat next to zemo in the back. After around five minutes you arrive in lowtown. A place where you could apparently find a gall called Selby. That hand snaked back around you as you intermingle with the crowded streets. The high density of the crowd forced you even closer to Zemos side leaving practically no space between you now. You could feel his warm body against yours, sending a shiver down your spine. He looks down on you. His eyes seem to be softer now than they were before and he gives you a quick kiss on the temple as if to reassure you that you’re safe. You tried to keep yourself from shaking him off of you but as you carried on walking, you got used to him a bit more. Sam and Bucky followed the two of you, both with grim faces.

Finally, you come to a bar, most people around you watching carefully as you all enter. Zemo orders the both of you a shot and Sam gets his usual. This turned out to be something containing whatever the barman cutout of a snake. The sight of it made your stomach drop, and to your astonishment, Sam actually drank it. He looked like he wanted to be sick but, no matter what he had to stay in character. Bucky gave a slight nod, he didn’t get a drink, not as the winter soldier.

You had let it be known of who you wanted to see and as you waited a man came up behind Zemo and you. He immediately guided you away from this man so he was in front of you and Zemo in front of the man. He knew you could hold your own, you had made that clear already, but he wanted to protect you. For the act of course. “You ain’t welcome here” the man stated, placing a hand roughly on zemos shoulder as he turned to face him. “I have no business with the powerbroker, but if he insists he can either talk to me” Zemo points at Bucky. His hand then slipped to yours, holding it tightly. “Or bring Selby for a chat”. The man looks displeased and walks away. You had many things you wanted to say to Zemo at this moment, but sticking to your character was more important. As he continued to grip your hand, other men started to menacingly prowl towards you all. Zemo gave Bucky the order to attack and so he did. A fight quickly broke out between them all but Bucky was far too strong for them all. This ended in Bucky holding one of the guys that remained standing against the bar table. Finally someone called to say selby was ready to see your group. This was going to be interesting.

Notes

Okay i left this on a little bit of a cliffhanger but the next chapter should be out in a day or so. This is my first fanfic i have published so I’m interested to see what everyone thinks. If there’s any spelling or grammar mistakes then umm you didn’t see anything. I hope you enjoyed!

@killsandthrills @aisling1985 @booklover2929 @arianalilyblack @your-pixels-are-showing @kenna-1904

[the-modernmary]

my best habit || aaron hotchner x reader (prologue)

Summary: When Aaron Hotchner ended your affair with him, saying that a serial killer was going after him and his family, you were content with the idea that you'd probably never see him again. Two years have come and gone since then, but when you get dragged into an FBI investigation as a key witness, you and Hotch are forced to come face to face with all the things left unsaid.

Warnings: Age gap (15-ish years), smut, degradation, unprotected sex. This story is 18+ older. This is not a story for minors.

A/N: Hello, hello!! I figured that since I've made a writing tumblr, I should post my story on here!! This is a multichapter story, so I am very excited to go on this journey with y'all!! I already have multiple chapters written and published, so these should be coming out VERY quickly. If you don't want to wait to catch up, you can read everything I have on ao3! This chapter starts as a flashback, and then the next chapter and the rest from here on out will be actual plot!

masterlist || read on ao3

“If you were waitin’ on the sunshine, blue sky

Cheap high, lullaby

Then my best habit’s letting you down”

- The Maine, “My Best Habit”

Two years earlier

Your eyes scanned the University Ballroom, your champagne glass practically ignored in your hand. You hated all these alumni networking galas and avoided going to them as much as possible. Old, sleazy lawyers with much younger women on their arm reliving their best cases with each other and expecting all the new law students to laugh when they were able to get their defendant acquitted because of some dumb technicality. It made you sick.

It didn’t help that you were already going in with a bad attitude. Your ex-boyfriend had dropped by your apartment that morning to pick up the rest of his stuff, and he decided that the best person to help him with that was the girl he had been cheating on you with. You caught them together three weeks ago, and you had been so stressed from midterms that you hadn’t even had the chance to go out, get drunk, and have wildly irresponsible rebound sex.

But you had to suck it up for the night, at least until you were able to get the answer you came for. After that, you could go back to your apartment, replace your too tight and too short dress with some nice pajamas, and watch trashy reality TV until you passed out on your couch.

You scanned the room a few more times until you caught sight of a tall man in a dark suit leaning against the bar. Bingo. You set your champagne flute down and ran over to him as fast as your heels could take you. Once you were just a few steps away, you quickly composed yourself and walked straight into his line of sight.

SSA Aaron Hotchner rarely came to alumni events here at George Washington Law School, citing that he wasn’t even a prosecutor anymore and had much more important work to do back at the BAU, but he was going as favor to his old law school buddy. Plus, it was either coming to this or going out to the bar with the team, and seeing as he had just signed the divorce papers with Haley, he wanted to be somewhere he wasn’t going to be profiled all night. The free champagne was also a bonus.

When you saw that his name was on the RSVP list, you knew that you had to go.

“Agent Hotchner?” you asked, giving him your best straight A student smile.

He refused to look up right away, not giving you the chance to charm him. “I’m not currently on duty. If there is a case you would like the BAU to look over, that’s handled by our media liaison,” he said absently, taking another sip of champagne.

You frowned but kept your hand out for him to shake. “That’s not what I’m here for, I-” You took a breath to compose yourself. “My name is Y/N Y/L/N. I’m a first year here- getting a joint JD and masters in forensic psychology. My goal is to become a prosecutor,” you pressed, and you were rewarded when he perked up in interest. He slid his drink on the table.

“Most law firms don’t usually want a prosecutor who’s going to empathize with the person you’re prosecuting,” he mused, and shook your hand, his grip just tight enough to pass as faux politeness.

You shook your head and clasped your hands behind your back, trying to ignore how warm his hands were. “I think the best prosecutors empathize with the defendants,” you admitted. “Isn’t that how you succeeded as both a prosecutor and as a federal agent? That’s actually why I came to you, I wanted to ask you a question... about my thesis,” you added quickly, figuring that the best way to get him to talk to you.

Aaron’s posture changed from half asleep to maybe listening, and your face went red. Sure, you only came to the event to talk to him, but you never thought that you’d actually get Aaron Hotchner to pay attention to you. “I didn’t empathize with the people I was putting in jail,” he told you, his voice ice cold. “That didn’t come until I worked in the BAU, and even now, I wouldn’t call it empathy. Just understanding of how they became the type of person they are.” He leaned sideways on the bar counter and you felt yourself shrink under his gaze. You shifted slightly and felt the hem of your dress move up your thighs ever so slightly. Aaron noticed too, if the lick of his lips was anything to go by.

You took his silence as your signal to ask your question. “You offered Jessica Michaelson a lesser sentence that had her released in just three years despite the fact that she murdered her brother in cold blood in his sleep. You had the evidence, why didn’t you push for premeditation?” you asked, and his eyebrow quirked upwards. “In the case The People vs. Michaelson,” you added unnecessarily, trying to break the silence.

“I know the case you’re referring to. I was the lead on it,” he reminded you, his voice edging on dangerous. “You know, most people aren’t interested in my days as a lawyer.”

You shrugged, hoping to appear more confident than you felt. “I’m not most people,” you agreed, biting down on your lower lip. His gaze was so intense, and it was affecting you in ways you couldn’t have imagined. It was turning you on, you realized with a start. It had been a while since you had last had sex, and it was driving you only slightly crazy. “But that doesn’t answer my question.”

Aaron grabbed a champagne flute from a server walking by, and shoved it in your direction. You grabbed it cautiously. “Did you read the police report on the case?” he asked, and you nodded wordlessly, taking a sip of the champagne. The alcohol was making you bolder, and you stepped towards him. “Then you’ll know that there was very little physical evidence tying her to the muder. We chose to offer the charge that would have stuck instead of risking her being found not guilty.”

You gritted your teeth together in an effort to calm yourself down. “She murdered four people within the six months after she was released from prison,” you reminded him.

That seemed to have struck a chord with Aaron, and his steely persona seemed to fade ever so slightly. He sighed exasperatedly; you were obviously getting on his nerves. “The prints and DNA that were collected and put into VICAP when she was in prison are what got her caught in the end, and that was the evidence needed to lock her away for life. We wouldn’t have gotten those prints without her original charge. It all worked out.”

You groaned and threw your hands in the air. “You couldn’t have predicted that, though,” you argued. “And people have been found guilty with way less evidence than you had in the original case. I think you just felt bad for her, considering her brother was a real piece of shit.” You were being difficult now, you knew that. But there was something about Aaron Hotcher that was pulling you in, and you wanted to see how far you could push him.

Aaron gave you a predatory grin and he stepped towards you ever so slightly, finishing his drink. He must have had multiple drinks too, judging by the soft flush on his face. “Oh, you do?” He seemed amused now. He slowly raked his eyes from your face, down your neck, and down the rest of your body, and you forgot how to breath. You knew that it was inappropriate and that he was a highly respected FBI agent, even if he was kind of an asshole at the moment. You also knew that the two of you were crossing lines that neither of you should have even been close to, but you shivered under the weight of his gaze all the same.

You shifted back and forth, your brain trying to process what was happening. “Yeah, I do. And I know that you transferred to the FBI after Michaelson was arrested again, which makes me think that this case was your breaking point,” you ranted, your hands becoming more and more animated.

Aaron chuckled, but there was very little amusement behind it. “Are you sure you want to be a lawyer?” he asked, cocking his head to the side. “Because you’re starting to talk like a profiler.”

You arched an eyebrow at him. “No thanks,” you said firmly, and he just shrugged before making a move to walk past you. You sidestepped in front of him, effectively blocking him from going anywhere. But it was obvious that he was done talking about this.

In your mind, you had two options now. You could keep pushing him about a case that he obviously didn’t want to talk to you about, or you could switch gears in your brain and have him help you solve your... other problem. Aaron was attractive, and you were getting tired of guys your age. You noticed the distinct lack of a wedding ring on his finger, but there was still a tan to show that it had been there. So either he was recently separated or just trying to cheat on his wife. You wanted to not care whichever it was, but a pang in your heart told you to be considerate. Besides, you did not want to get involved with another cheater.

“Must be hard to be at these events without your wife here to scare off all the lonely female law students,” you mused cautiously. You didn’t want to come on too strong, but the alcohol in your system was slowly clouding your ability to be subtle.

Aaron cleared his throat, obviously taken aback by the sudden shift in conversation. “I’m not married,” he said, too quickly and too defensively. So he’s separated, you thought, and you stepped closer to him.

His eyebrows furrowed as he tried to figure out your endgame. “Well, I would love to discuss your work as a prosecutor more when there are less… distractions around,” you whispered, your words breathy. “Tell me Agent Hotchner, do I make you nervous?” You sounded a lot more confident than you felt.

Aaron just smirked and grabbed your free hand, covering it in both of his, and the action was surprisingly soft, even if it was way too late for him to try acting suave. His eyes, on the other hand, told a whole other story. His pupils were so dilated that his eyes were practically black. “I face the worst people in society on a daily basis. Desperate law students don’t make me nervous. In fact…” He stepped towards you, looking around to make sure nobody else was looking. Aaron leaned in close, his lips brushing against your ear with every word. “I think that I make you nervous. And more than nervous, I make you very excited.”

Your breath hitched as he pulled back, a smug smile gracing his lips. You yanked your hand back to preserve what little dignity you had left, but it was too late. “Now, if you would like to discuss my prosecuting career more in depth, then you can set up a formal meeting with me at the BAU,” he continued, obviously proud of himself and the effect he was having on you. He pulled out a business card and upon further instruction, you realized that it wasn’t even his. Jennifer Jareu the name read. “Our media liaison will be able to help you organize that. Now if you don’t mind, I am going to retire for the night.”

Aaron finished the rest of his drink and brushed past you while you were still trying to get your thoughts under control. “Oh, and you’ll make a wonderful lawyer someday, I’m sure of it,” he called over his shoulder, and that snapped you back into action.

You followed, running around him and cutting him off. “And if I don’t want to discuss your prosecuting career?” you asked, batting your eyelashes at him. “What if I was interested in a… less formal meeting?”

That was all the permission he needed. Aaron grabbed your hand and pulled you out of the ballroom, the two of you moving so fast that nobody in the room even had a chance to put two and two together. There was an empty hallway just next to the entrance of the room and Aaron pulled you in that direction, pressing you against the wall and kissing you fiercely the second the two of you were alone.

There was nothing gentle about the kiss, but in a strange role reversal, he let you take the lead. It’s certainly not what you expected from Aaron Hotchner who, until now, had been controlling every aspect of your meeting. You realized then that this was his way of making sure you were okay with what was happening- giving you a chance to back out and change your mind. You just answered by tangling your hands in his hair, pulling so that he was at just the right angle to kiss you.

Aaron dug his fingers into your hips, hard enough to make you gasp out. You were definitely going to have bruises the next day, but you couldn’t be bothered to care. He shoved his leg in between yours and tugged on your lip with his teeth, which made you whimper involuntarily. He smirked against your lips, obviously proud of the noises he was drawing from you. You pulled on his hair harder as a sign of irritation, but that seemed to only make him more amused as he pulled away to laugh into your neck.

“Are we just going to make out against a wall like we’re back in high school, or are you going to actually do something worth my time?” you breathe, fighting to keep your voice even and light. It only halfway worked as he dragged his tongue up your neck to your pulse point. And then he bit down, hard.

It took everything in your power to stay quiet, especially as he softly kissed the newly forming bruise. His attack on your neck was relentless as he pulled your hips and back forth against his thigh. You whimpered as you desperately tried to get any friction from the simple movement. Your skirt was now dangerously close to being pushed so far up your legs that you would be completely exposed.

You pulled away first- you had to or your legs were going to completely give out from under you. You desperately tried to get your breathing under control and, to your annoyance, he looked perfectly composed. The only thing giving him away was his slightly swollen lips.

His fingers trailed up your thigh, getting so close to where you want him. “What would you like me to do then?” he asked easily, his voice almost sounding bored. You were speechless, like your brain had just short circuited. There were a lot of things you wanted him to do, but the words were lost on the tip of your tongue. “If you want something, you have to ask for it.” That was a demand, and he punctuated it by pressing his thigh further into you. You were sure he was going to have a wet spot on his slacks. He took the hand not in between your legs and grabbed your jaw forcefully, his thumb resting on your bottom lip. “Use your words, little girl.”

You realize that the two of you were standing on the edge of a cliff, and you had the power to decide whether or not to jump over. It gave you a strange sense of power. Logically, you knew it was a bad idea. He was too old for you, obviously going through some sort of relationship trauma, and wasn’t somebody you could talk to your friends and family about. But the less rational side wanted him so badly it hurt. You wanted him more than you’ve wanted anything or anyone in a long time.

You noticed your strawberry colored lipstick was smudged ever so slightly on the corner of his mouth, and that’s all it took for you to jump off the side of the cliff. “I want you to drag me into the empty classroom just down the hall and fuck me senseless. I want you to use me,” you moan before taking his thumb into your mouth and sucking.

The look on his face is something you’ll never forget. There was a mix of shock and arousal, but also something primitive; His eyes darkened when you told him to use you, and there was a fluttering in your stomach. You couldn’t tell if it was from excitement or dread. Maybe even both.

He removed his hands from your mouth and legs, only to place his hand on the small of your back. He began walking towards the classroom you had pointed out, much too slow for your liking, but he knew exactly what he was doing. “You’re going to regret asking me to use you,” he practically growls in your ear, each word increasing your arousal. “Are you one of those lonely female law students you warned me about? So desperate and needy for a real man to bend you over a table and fuck you until you can’t walk straight? Ready and willing to whore yourself out for the first man who gives you a second glance?”

Your breath hitched as you stuttered out your answer. “Y-yes, Agent Hotchner,” you whispered as he opened the classroom door and guided you in.

As soon as the door was shut and locked, he was back on your lips again, lifting you so that you were sitting on one of the desks with your legs wrapped around his waist. “Call me Aaron,” he mumbled in between kisses, and you were all too happy to oblige.

You were a moaning mess at this point as his hands pushed your dress up to your waist. His hands and lips were somehow everywhere at once and you were so hot and all you could think about was getting your damn dress off, but Aaron seemed to have other plans.

He ran his fingers up your lace covered slit and he just chuckled into your lips. “You’re so wet for me, already,” he groaned and you let out an embarrassingly loud moan. “And I’ve barely touched you. Do my words really have that much effect on you? Do you like it when I call you a whore?”

He hooked his fingers under the waistband of your panties and quickly pulled them down. You could feel his bulge pressing against you and all you could think about was how badly you wanted it. How badly you wanted him. Your hands moved down his chest to make quick work of his belt, and his pants followed after.

“Please, please Aaron,” you begged, desperately trying to create some friction against him. His fingers tangled in your hair and he pulled your head back so that you were looking at him.

“You’re so pretty when you beg.” His fingers slowly ran up your slit, not enough to give you any pleasure. He was teasing you and enjoying every second of it. “And I wish I could take my time with you. The things I want to do to you…” Two of his fingers entered you and you cried out loudly. “But somebody could walk in on us at any second. I’m sure they can all hear you moaning like a dirty whore, all for me. But you’d like that, wouldn’t you? So desperate for my attention and approval.”

His words turned you on more than you would have liked to admit. “Yes, Aaron yes. Please-” you were cut off by Aaron curling his fingers, hitting that spot that made you want to scream out in pleasure. But all too soon, they were gone.

He inspected his fingers, which were now covered in your juices, before bringing them to your mouth. “Suck,” he ordered, and you eagerly complied, wrapping your lips around his fingers and moaning at the taste of yourself. “I’ll just have to fuck you quickly here, and then you’ll be begging for more next time,” he groaned and finally- finally- entered you.

He didn’t give you time to adjust to him, thrusting roughly into you. He removed his fingers from your mouth and brought his hand to your neck. He didn’t put any pressure, but he wanted you to know that he could and would if you decided to get mouthy with him.

Your hands gripped the edge of the desk you were sitting on, your knuckles turning white. Your eyes started to close in pleasure as his hips slammed into yours, but they shot open as he tightened his grip on your throat. “Look at me. I want to see you when you cum,” he ordered, and you nodded the best you could.

“Yes sir!” you cried out, unsure of what else to say.

Seemingly satisfied with your answer, Aaron released your throat and moved his hand down so that he was stimulating your clit. You could feel the coil in your stomach tighten as your legs started to twitch. Aaron took this as motivation to slam into you even harder, relishing each time you gasped out his name.

His pace was unforgiving, leaving you gasping for air. Keeping your eyes open was a challenge, but you were able to do it with his soft mutters of praise. “Even brats like you can be good girls,” he groaned, his thrusts becoming erratic. “You just need somebody to fuck it into you.”

You were unable to respond coherently, so you just settled on begging even more, although you weren’t sure what you were begging for exactly. Aaron seemed to know, and he sped up his fingers against your clit. You wanted to scream out for him, but your voice wasn’t working. “What did I say before?” he asks roughly. “If you want something, ask for it.”

“Please… please can I cum?” you cried out, feeling yourself getting close to the edge. “Please let me cum around your cock!”

He nodded in approval and you had to muffle yourself in his neck to keep quiet. He fucked you through your orgasm, the overstimulation almost too much, but it wasn’t long before he was moaning your name, and you felt him fill you.

The two of you stayed like that for a few moments, both breathing heavily as the situation started to sink in. You just let a guy almost 15 years older than you that you just met fuck you in an empty classroom, and you really enjoyed it. Aaron, on the other hand, looked like he was going through a full crisis.

He pulled out of you slowly, and you winced at the feeling. He pulled up his pants quickly. “Fuck,” he muttered under his breath, looking around the empty classroom. “I don’t have anything good to clean you up with.” A box of kleenex caught his eye and he grabbed a few tissues. It was better than nothing.

You chuckled nervously and waved it off. “It’s fine,” you promised, your voice coming out shakier than you expected, but he ignored you. He wiped the mess dripping down your thighs. You were cold. He must have noticed, because he took off his suit jacket and wrapped it around your shoulders.

“Are you okay?” Aaron asked softly, and it was a full 180 from the way he had just been talking to you.

“I’m great,” you admitted honestly. “Seriously, that was… great.”

Aaron smiled at you- the first real smile he had given you all night. “It wasn’t too much?” he confirmed, and you suddenly remembered what he had said to you earlier. ...then you’ll be begging for more next time. Was he planning on a next time? You wouldn’t have minded it.

You shook your head and slowly slid off the table. You took one of the tissues and wiped up the mess that was left on the table. “Not at all. In fact, I could take more. Next time.” Your voice was light and airy. Aaron watched as you picked your underwear off the floor. There was no way you were putting those back on, not when you had no idea when the floor was last cleaned.

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” he teased, eyeing you carefully.

“Well I can’t keep it if I only have your media liaison’s number,” you reminded him, your eyebrow raised. Aaron chuckled and pulled out another business card, except this time it was his. You plucked the card out of his hands and inspected it carefully. “I’ll call you sometime. You can do all those other things we didn’t have time to do.” You were on your tiptoes now, whispering in his ear. “You know… my mouth can do a lot more than just ask for things.” As you spoke, you slipped your panties into his back pocket. You just laughed as you heard a soft gasp escape his lips.

You made your way towards the door, your legs wobbling dangerously underneath you. You were sure that you looked like a mess, but you didn’t care. All that mattered to you was Aaron Hotchner’s eyes glued to your ass. “Get home safe,” he told you and you let yourself smile. Maybe it was a bad idea to start sleeping with a recent divorcee, but the sex was great and you both knew where you stood with the other person. No feelings, just fucking out your frustrations and stress.

Oh yeah, coming to this event was definitely a good call on your part.

[buddha-in-disguise]

What do we know about Supergirl S6?

Well, we know the following.

First BHS came from David & he had Chyler and Jesse with him.

Chyler was dressed in a jacket & pants and the Martian weapon on her wrist in a second photo David posted.

The main thing that stood out was the background. It suggests they’re at The Tower, & possibly with a medical monitor (I highlight it in red) in the background. If not medical, I’d say environmental or maybe Space monitor. Either way, it is an intriguing bit of background imo.

Otherwise, bar one lot of BHS from Staz, have only shown everyone is their Superhero suits (inc Alex). Kelly has been in the leather jacket she wore with the Guardian Shield for the Myx (100th) episode, with M’gann suited up alongside her.

Kelly has also been spotted in pants & a jacket - a far cry from the tight skirts & dresses from S5, & much closer to S4. We know Kelly has been on set a lot when everyone else is, plus filming at times with Chyler - so dare we hope that Kelly is actually going to be included properly this season? And that she is much more proactive, including using the Shield, like she did in Crisis & the 100th. We can certainly hope that is the case. After all, it is what pretty much all Kelly Olsen fans (myself included) have asked for since the end of S4, let alone as we watched the shitstorm aka S5 play out.

We know from Jesse there is going to be a bit of a Legion vibe going on, and that certainly tracks with the BHS photos.

We know that 6.01, 6.02, 6.03, 6.04, 6.05 & 6.06 were all wrapped before the Christmas hiatus. We also know that Chyler directed Ep 6, (which she mentioned herself when talking about it in one of her Create Change lives early on).

We know in 6.06, it involves not only the young Danvers sisters, but we definitely have Nia and Brainy playing a pretty significant role. Not only did we get them posting on an outside location set , we also know from someone who went down to where they were filming on the sports field & Nicole & Jesse were both seen on set (screen cap included in amongst the rest of them here).

We also know from a known member BTS on the SG set on Reddit posted in reply to a couple of questions that cleared up Katie’s involvement & Melissa being away from set. So we can say Melissa will be filming in scenes to add into what has already been done by the rest of the cast. We can also say Katie has been filming. So please everyone just take a breath.

Now onto sets in general.

We have had glimpses that tease Space craft, weaponry in the form of a galactic laser rifle.

We have a possibly tie in to the casting video side that came up on Vimo in regards a Prison set vibe, with the concrete corridors, but with grating shadow from lighting above (see Nicole’s tiktok), & separately, Jen Clarke (Melissa’s stunt double) standing alongside a circular plinth of some kind, with grating around it.

Then we have the futuristic look that David was standing in for his directorial episode after the hiatus.

We had a possible slate on Vimeo that suggested a witch villain?

So, I’m hoping that - we have this season set up much more like S1 & S2, with tight sets, outer space/magic/more than one Villain, or like Reign, a central villain, but not necessarily through the entire season.

As for Rosemary (the slate on Vimeo) I can’t help but wonder if this is going to be a version of Amparon Cardenas, aka La Dama, especially as in the DC universe she is from Earth Prime and has known magic powers.

Another aspect of the canon DC character is that she kills off half the future Justice League, but this is where I think it could tie in with Chyler’s directors episode 6.06 - she brainwashes a group of teenagers, who in another reality would have become the legion of Superhero’s. She effectively makes them her slaves.

Is that why Nia and Brainy have to travel back to Midvale? Are the young Danvers sisters brainwashed? Do they need to go around fixing the past to save the future?

Well, that would certainly not be something Chyler has ever done before, & would probably I imagine be a pretty hard 1st ep to direct, so again tracks with what she has said.

If Rosemary blames Kara etc for Earth Prime changing, & so she changes with it (eg loss of powers) it would certainly give good grounds for a story of revenge.

Honestly, as long as we have Kelly, Alex, Nia, Kara, & Lena all actually playing their roles properly, & not just performative like S5 was, and Dansen, Brainia and yes, Supercorp to actually happen - it will be a step up. Not that it would be hard to step up when you’ve hit flat rock bottom, scraping of the barrel the previous season.

I’m going to have forgotten something, I always do, so if anyone has additional thoughts on this, please do comment. Also apologies for any typos as I’ve not checked this.

[purebarnes]

courage to change— (fem!avenger x bucky!)

ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ ➢ when bucky has the idea to go see zemo to see what he knew and if he didn’t, how he could help them figure out who has made the super soldier serum. bucky then wants to break zemo out of jail making sam and y/n skeptical about it all.

ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ ➢ 2.5k

ᴅɪꜱᴄʟᴀɪᴍᴇʀꜱ ➢ angst, yelling(tad), nothin serious

ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ ꜱᴘᴇᴀᴋꜱ ! ➢ this started out fine but went down so my bad about this chapter.

the whole situation with zemo and going to see him was a tricky situation, y/n obviously wasn’t sure she would go through it. zemo obviously wasn’t fond of the avengers giving what he thought they did to his family and country. the girl wasn’t going to lie, she was there to help her dad and the avengers fight ultron but we all know how that turned out.

there was still the possibility that she would leave and head back to pepper but bucky kept trying to tell her to stay. she agreed to stay and see what zemo would say but she knew it was going to be worse then she would imagine. when all three of them made it to berlin, they all entered to go see him but bucky didn’t want sam or y/n to go in. the girl hated the smell of prison, well she just thought it smelled like bad. when they walked towards a door they stopped he wanted to tell them to stay back.

“i’m gonna go in alone—no, why?” y/n asked raising her eyebrows waiting for an answer she liked, “you’re both avengers. you know how he feel about that.” bucky told her making her shake her head in disbelief, “it’s not like you two were know for frolickin' in the sun together—he was obsessed with hydra. we have a history together. can you trust me on this? i got it.”

he looked at y/n grabbing her hand and rubbing his thumb in a circular motion telling her that it would be fine. she closed her eyes nodding before he let go and went to leave to see zemo. she leaned onto the wall where prisons could be kept on the other side of the wall. y/n inhaled then closed her eyes getting a feeling something were to happen soon but pushed it off. sam could tell something was up but never went to ask as she told them to not worry about her.

sam looked up and saw her on the wall, he stayed silent waiting for bucky to come back. she never would of thought she would be doing something by her self and without her dad on her side. she knew she wouldn’t eventually have to start i her own but she wouldn’t of imagined him leaving so soon. when tony’s funeral came around, he made the video about if he were to die then it was for them.

y/n had a video that he made her but she couldn’t bare look at it, she wasn’t ready and days would go by where she would always think about opening and playing it but never went through it. sam took this as an opportunity to ask her something about her. he went to cough obnoxiously and when she looked up, sam was leaning on the wall next to her. “so, you and torres huh?” she chuckled at his accusation, she thought he was too late but something was holding her back. she smiled, pausing then speaking up.

“no. why’d you ask?” she asked sam and he pulled up his phone and showed her the texts from him and torres. they were a bunch of them asking if she was single and asking if he could date her. she leaned over to see the last message about asking permission— “why would you need to ask permission? anyways, he’s cute i guess.” y/n wasn’t lying but she just didn’t want to be with someone at the moment or at least not him. sam pushed his phone back in his pocket then went to lean back down seeing the door open to bucky.

he walked near them, “how’d it go?” sam asked getting up to see bucky telling him that it was done, something seemed confusing about the situation to y/n. she let it go when they all went to be less to a place but bucky told them not to ask any questions until they left, the next thing he said was that he wanted to break zemo out of jail. “what are you talking about? you wanna break zemo outta jail? where the hell are we, buck? have you lost your mind?” sam question boarding him with questions about what he was thinking.

y/n couldn’t see so she ended up falling with a thud sound behind her when bucky noticed her not behind them anymore. “shit. where’d y/n go?—a flashlight would’ve been nice.” she rolled her eyes as bucky went to go pick her up from the floor and apologized. “sorry doll, we only had two.” bucky frowned pushing her forward so that she could see better and not fall like before. bucky went to continue his conversation, “we have no leads, no moves, nothing—what we have is one of the most dangerous men in the world behind bars.” sam fired back at the super soldier.

“we have eight super soldier that are loose—no, zemo will mess with our minds. especially yours. no offense.” sam told him, he still wouldn’t agree on what bucky wanted to and something as this dangerous wouldn’t be pretty. bucky went to turn on the lights then turned off his flashlight, sam doing the same. “offense. super soldiers go against everything he believes in. he is crazy, but he still has a code.” bucky walked away from him, “yeah but we’ve both been on the wrong side of that code.”

y/n still couldn’t get her wrap her mind around what the man was telling both of them and sam went to look at y/n for help. she sighed turning to look at him, “he blew up the un, he killed king t’chaka and framed you for it. did you forget that, buck? you think the wakandans forgot? well they didn’t! i know why this matters to you but it’s pushing you off the deep end.” his face softened when she used buck instead of bucky because she would always say buck when she cared about him. “we don’t know how they’re getting the serum. we don’t even know how many of them there are. look, let me walk you guys through a hypothetical. can I walk you through a hypothetical?”

when he said that, y/n and sam turned around slowly to face him although they knew he had to do something or he wouldn’t have said that. y/n shook her head looking at bucky to start, “what did you do—i didn’t do anything.” the man stuttered and y/n narrowed her eyes at him making him back up seeing that she scared him even if he was stronger, like he would like to say. “the weakest point in any system isn’t the software, the hardware, it’s the meat ware. the human element.” he looked back at them.

y/n shared a uneasy look with sam when he continued explaining what he was going through, “now, in this lockup, it’s none to one, prisoners to guards, and if two prisoners start fighting, then the protocol says four guards have to respond.” sam interrupted him not getting what he was getting at all. “so why would two prisoners randomly start fighting at that moment?—who knows? there could be many reasons... but the point is, these things escalate. lockdown procedures would have to be initiated, and with all those bodies flying left and right, wouldn’t be hard to slip down a hallway or two.”

“and if the fire alarm got tripped while the prisoners were being separated... someone could use the chaos to their advantage.” he finished when y/n breathed in biting her lip, “i don’t like how casual you’re bein' about this. this is unnatural. are you... and where are we, man?” sam asked when the front door opened and someone started walking to them.

the figure was unclear when he finally came into view and y/n, sam widened their eyes going wide. she grew confused and went to go near him, “whoa, what?” y/n started, “what are you doin' here?—i didn’t want to tell 'cause i knew you wouldn’t let this happen—what did you do?” y/n was pulled back from sam telling her he had it all. “sam we need him—you’re going back to prison!” y/n exclaimed pointing at zemo’s direction.

he took off the cap, “if i may—no!” all three of them yelled at him making zemo step back and apologize then looking back at both sam and y/n obviously upset and betrayed he would do that. he turned to sam, “when steve refused to sign the sokovia accords, you backed him. you broke the law and you struck your neck out for me.” he said then turning to look at y/n when she looked at anywhere but him. “y/n look at me. look at me.” he gently grabbed her face making her look at him and she looked up at him.

“what about when you let me go when you saw me and steve on the run, you helped me. i’m asking you to do it again—both of you.” he said letting go of her face then looking directly at sam this time, “i really think i’m invaluable—shut up.” zemo tried to say but sam wasn’t having it. it took a second before sam and y/n agreed to help him. sam looked at y/n and she nodded regretting it, “if we do this, you don’t move with our permission. okay, zemo. where do we start?” sam said, all three of them looking at him.

━━━

the next thing they all did was go and go see a car and zemo told them that it was his, skeptical form y/n and sam. this was dangerous and couldn’t be trusted but also she know where zemo was coming from when he want vengeance against the avengers.

y/n would do anything to get her mother but it was too late—she was already gone when she got to her. y/n was walking to see the cars and she stopped when she saw a yellow one. she thought it was a nice lookin car, “i spent years hunting people hydra recruited to recreate the serum. because once it’s out there, someone can create an army of people... like the avengers.” zemo turned to look directly at sam and y/n, she just stared at him.

zemo looked back into one of the cars before continuing to talk about what he was thinking, “i ended the winter soldier program once before. i have no intention to leave my work unfinished. to do this, we’ll have to scale a ladder of lowlifes.” he said walking away as sam responded, “well, join the party. we’ve already started—first stop is a woman named selby. mid-level fence i still have a line in. from there, we climb.” he left them as the three of them stayed back walking towards him.

the all started heading towards a jet, “so all this time you’ve been rich?—i’m a baron, sam. my family was royalty until your friends destroyed my country.” zemo replied back speaking russian and went to enter the jet while y/n went to get on and she missed the planes and jets. she was snobby about it but she did love them, any chance she could get on one.

when they made it to the jet and they got on, they all sat down in the seats they picked out. y/n was in front of zemo while bucky and sam were across of each other but bucky told her to move seats but she said she was fine. “just sit across of him—it’s fine.” they whispered and zemo could tell something was up, “i won’t hurt her if that’s—i’m not scared of you.” y/n told him crossing her legs and looking out the window. zemo picked up a book before looking at it, “i’m sorry. i was just fascinated by this. i don’t know what to call it, but this seems to be important. who is nakajima?” bucky looked up before sprinting up and holding zemo by the neck.

y/n looked up wanting bucky to let go of him, she hated when he got like that. it was like a part of the winter soldier was still there, “if you touch that again, i’ll kill you.” he let go before going to his seat. y/n couldn’t help but keep her eyes on the man, she never heard that name before and she also wanted to know who he was. zemo apologized, “people you’ve wronged as the winter soldier but why isn’t y/n on here.” y/n closed her eyes not wanting zemo to bring up her mother but that’s exactly what he did.

bucky tensed up, “don’t push it—you must miss your mother? i know i would and now you’re father.” she grew hot and wanted to just take all the anger she had on zemo but that wouldn’t help anything. zemo knew what he was doing and he was doing it well, he was mad about his family so he took it out on y/n. “zemo.” sam warned him not to continue, y/n felt like exploding so she got up before she excused herself.

“excuse me, i uh... need to do something real quick.” y/n closed her eyes before leaving to use the bathroom and she could hear distant yelling from sam and bucky telling him to calm down and not do anything hasty. y/n entered the bathroom then went to sit on the toilet seat and put her hands in her face, “oh dad. i can’t do this anymore.” she silently cried to herself wanting to be with her dad at that moment.

ten seconds later she heard a knock and sniffled to say something that wouldn’t sound like she was crying. “yea, yeah just gimme a second.” no use though because it sounded congested like she was sick, she opened the door and saw bucky. she sighed while wiping the tears from her eyes, “sorry, here it’s all yours—i don’t need it.” she went to wash her hands then bucky went in the bathroom to shut the door and locking it.

this was something you would seen in movies, where they would lock the doors and something else would happen. so she was confused on what was happening, he went to grab her hands and squeezing them tightly, “there isn’t a day where i don’t have nightmares about what i did to your mom—that’s wasn’t you buck.” she reassured him that the winter soldier wasn’t who he was well not anymore.

“it was still me, i put you in so much pain. you never deserved that doll.” y/n stifled a smile before looking at his blue eyes that she loved. “i could never blame you. not now, not ever.” she said letting go and rubbing her thumb over bucky’s cheek this time. she went over to out her arms around his waist and gave him a tight hug. she leaned in to kiss his cheek but stopped when she was close to his lips.

she could tell it was getting awkward and gave him a wide smile before leaving the bathroom to go back to have a seat away from everyone. all that was next was to go on ahead and finish the mission.

[hrtiu]

Dogma had already lost track of the days when she arrived. Two red-clad Coruscant Guard troopers tossed her into the high-security cell and left the room without sparing him even a glance. She was a Jedi, Dogma recognized instantly, and she could choke him out from across the room if she wanted to, but the guards probably didn’t care. He was pretty sure there wasn’t a being left in the galaxy who even remembered he was here, so what did it matter if she killed him?

But she didn’t kill him. Instead she sat down on the durasteel bench in her cell and pulled her knees up to her chest, then let her head hang down. He could relate.

“What did you do to end up here?” he asked.

She looked up, the splatter of black diamonds across her nose scrunching up in surprise. “Oh! I didn’t know anyone else was here.”

Dogma stood and walked to the end of his cell closest to hers, a narrow walkway between their separate enclosures. “This is a special prison, for prisoners of the Jedi Order. What did you do?”

Her eyebrows knit together. “I had no idea the Order took prisoners.”

“Not many,” Dogma said with a shrug. “You’re the first I’ve seen besides me.”

She pulled her arms even tighter around herself and looked to the floor. “I bombed the Jedi Temple.”

Dogma blinked at her. “What?”

She didn’t respond.

Dogma’s eyes narrowed and he looked harder at her. He remembered where he’d seen her before. She’d been General Unduli’s Commander, the one with the thoughtful eyes. He had never spoken with her and only seen her a few times, but she’d made a good impression. He’d thought she’d been one of the good ones.

“Pah!” he spat in disgust. “Are all you Jedi secretly monsters?”

She looked up, anguish twisting her young features. “No! I mean, I don’t know! I-! No one was supposed to be there!”

“What do you mean?”

“I wanted to send a message,” she said, her blue eyes going distant. “Your words are truer than you know. The Order has lost its way, we’ve become the very thing we’re meant to ward against. How can one promote peace with violence? It’s impossible—a complete contradiction. And that’s what I was trying to show.”

Dogma quirked an eyebrow at her. “You were trying to show how stupid it is to use violence in the name of peace by using violence in the name of peace?”

“It was stupid, I know. But nobody was supposed to get hurt. It was supposed to send a message.”

“But people did get hurt,” Dogma said, and it wasn’t a question. He of all people could understand how good intentions could turn out wrong.

“I was working with an activist, someone who was against war, like me. She asked me for materials and information and together we planned it. But it was supposed to happen at night, when no one was around. We were supposed to blow up a few fighters—something expensive but not deadly. I didn’t know she’d turn her own husband into a living bomb. I didn’t know she’d have him detonate in the middle of the day while the hangar was packed.”

Dogma’s eyes widened and his fingers tightened around the bars of his cell. “You blew up the whole hangar?”

She burst to her feet and her jaw clenched. “I didn’t mean to! It wasn’t me!” Then all the fight drained from her and she leaned forward, resting her head against the bars. “But you’re right. Ultimately I’m responsible. I tried to run, tried to hide my crimes because I was a coward, but that only led me down an even darker path. There’s nothing for me now but to face the consequences.”

Dogma’s mouth twisted into a wry smile. “I know a little something about consequences. You make peace with them, eventually.”

She looked up at him, curiosity lighting her eyes for the first time since her arrival. That didn’t surprise him. Most people assumed they knew everything they needed to know about a clone right off the bat.

“If this place is for prisoners of the Order, then why are you here?” she asked.

“I killed a Jedi General,” he said simply.

Her eyes grew large as moons. “What? Why? How?”

“He was evil!” Dogma snapped. “He was getting soldiers killed right and left and I didn’t even question him because he was my General, because he was a Jedi! But the Jedi aren’t always good people.”

Her face face, the black diamonds across her cheeks sinking down in dejection. “Was that... Master Krell? I heard the rumors...”

“Yes. It was Pong Krell and I don’t regret it. I saved lives and I knew what it would cost. Better a naive, treacherous fool like me suffer the consequences than my brothers.”

“I admire that. You believed in something greater than yourself.”

“So did you.”

She fell silent and her expression grew contemplative as she absorbed his words. Bombing her own people was so incomprehensible to Dogma—even after Krell he couldn’t imagine sabotaging his own army—but he found he was still glad she was here. He was grateful he didn’t have to suffer this endless purgatory alone.

“Why are you here, if you don’t mind my asking?” she said eventually. “I would have thought a clone trooper would be decommissioned for something like that.”

It was true. Nobody even really knew what “decommissioning” meant, but soldiers guilty of treason or murder or even just too injured to recover were sent to Kamino and never came back. But not Dogma.

“General Skywalker is blocking it. He doesn’t want me to be punished, said that somebody needed to take out Krell and that I’d done the right thing. He doesn’t have enough sway to get me pardoned but he can keep me here.”

“That’s generous of him to see it your way,” she said.

“He doesn’t see it my way,” Dogma corrected. “I’d rather receive my punishment.”

“Just want to get it over with? I can understand that.”

“No, Dogma said with a shake of his head. “No, I just believe in the law. According to GAR law and regulation I should be decommissioned, and I knew that and accepted it when I shot Krell. Our laws are what keeps us together, what makes the Republic fair and just. I’m not looking for mercy.”

She gave him an odd look, her head tilting to the side. “And yet the universe offers it nonetheless. What will you do with it... I’m sorry, I don’t know your name.”

“I’m Dogma. And you?”

“Barriss Offee.”

He reached his hand through the bars to shake hers, and across the narrow hallway their fingers only just touched. They shook anyway, the gesture silly but somehow still comforting.

“Pleased to meet you,” Dogma said.

“Likewise. I have feeling the Force has plans for us yet, no matter what we want.”

Thinking of his last few months of chaos, turmoil, and upheaval, Dogma smiled grimly back at her. “I think you may be right.”

[chibinekochan]

My biggest treasure - Ft. Mammon part 2

part 1

Obey me! Monster tales masterlist

-----

The days until you meet with Mammon pass quickly.

You tell your elderly neighbors to look after your siblings, while you are out of town for work.

They are very kind people, they are sort of adoptive grandparents to you and your siblings. Always offering support and they love to watch them. In exchange, you all take care of their garden and house repairs.

Your siblings are sad when you once again set out to work. At least you can afford the medicine when the job is done, maybe even an extra dose.

This motivates you greatly on the way to your meeting spot.

Mammon is surprisingly already there. Somehow you expected him to be late. He might be more dedicated than you thought.

"Hey, Mammon." You casually greet him.

"Yo, before we go, can I see Goldie?" He seems serious about his request.

You almost chuckle. "How can you be so attached to a coin?" You then produce the coin that was hidden underneath your clothes.

Mammon cheeks darken a little when your clothes expose the tiniest amount of skin.

"It's just important to me." He huffs while looking in a different direction.

You shake your head and hand him the coin.

He looks at it fondly and then returns it to you. "Now I'm good."

"Don't worry, I will take good care of your precious coin." You chuckle and put the coin back into its hiding spot.

Mammon cheeks are darker than ever before. "H-hey, don't make fun of me."

You suddenly realize it's kind of fun to tease him.

"It's alright, we all got things that are important to us." You smile at him.

"W-well, we should get goin…." Mammon awkwardly starts walking.

"Hold on a second. Do you even have a plan?" You have a bad feeling.

"I always have a plan." He proudly says.

"What plan is that?" Your bad feelings only get stronger.

"The same as always. Go in and take the loot!" Mammon says this with full confidence.

You almost facepalm. "You can't be serious! Something like this needs a plan, careful observation, skills, and an opportunity. You can't just waltz in and take everything." You barely can believe what you just heard.

"Worked so far for me." He shrugs in a carefree manner.

"How many times have you been successful?" It seems like just words aren't convincing him.

He thinks for a moment. "About thirty percent." Mammon even looks proud of that number.

"You can't be serious. I might be better off doing this alone after all." You let out a heavy sigh.

"Aww come on. You can't just abandon the mission before it even starts. I even entrusted Goldie with ya." He desperately pleads with you.

"If you still want me as your partner, we will do this my way." You look sternly towards Mammon.

"I'm confident about this one. You gotta trust me!" He almost sounds offended.

"My way or no way. Your decision." You shrug, ready to walk away.

Mammon throws his hands up. "Fine, alright, but if we get caught I'll haunt your ass just sayin."

"I'll haunt your ass if you don't listen to me." You huff at him.

"Gee, alright, I'll play along, no need to be so dramatic." Mammon reluctantly agrees.

"You started this." You shoot an annoyed look at him.

You bicker a bit longer until you finally get to talk about the plan.

It has definitely changed and it'll require observation.

The gist of it is still the same as before, though.

"I think I got it all now, even when you somehow managed to suck all the fun outta this." After explaining it several times, Mammon finally understands everything.

"It's not supposed to be fun, it's illegal,, and I can't and won't go to prison." You can't believe his words.

"I agree on that part,, but you know you are pretty stuck up. I noticed that in the bar too, all just fake ass smiles." Mammon seems somehow to be able to see right through you.

"I'm not stuck up, it's not like working in this line of work is my dream. Not this and not working at the bar. Well, the bar job isn't bad, but I certainly had other goals for my life. Besides, I can't afford to goof around." You have too many important responsibilities to deal with.

"I understand we all have stuff we gotta deal with, but you gotta have fun too, ya know." Mammon tries to make you understand his point of view.

"I personally think you aren't taking any of this seriously at all. Which is also quite an issue." You lead the conversation away from yourself. It's painful to know that he has a point.

Mammon just shrugs. "At least I'm willing to try your way, so better be thankful for that."

"Only because you know deep down that I'm right." You cross your arms.

"Well, mostly because I really need that money. I got a literal ghost haunting me about money, ya know." Mammon shudders slightly.

"I don't think I want to know more about that story. So we better follow the plan, so you can get that precious beauty sleep." You can only imagine how he owes a ghost money.

"I'm sleeping very well, thanks for the concern." Mammon seems a bit flustered.

Funny how easy that is.

"I guess that's one thing we don't need to worry about then. Anyway, tomorrow night is a new moon. That will give us the best chance, especially since the owner will be out of the house." This will be the best opportunity for you.

"I just want this to be over at this point." Mammon sighs deeply.

You both hide out in separate places.

Your main plan involves Mammon being a decoy, the perfect way to use him in your opinion. Somehow you took a guess and figured he loves a bit of showmanship and is absolutely right about it.

"I love my new outfit, I feel much fancier with this new vest." Mammon is pleased at least. "Who knew you had such talents."

"It's not that hard, maybe I can teach you." You poke his side teasingly.

"H-hey… you can't just touch me…and who says that we're gonna work together again?" Mammon seems strangely embarrassed again.

"Yeah, that is something we will have to see." You wink at him and pull your mask down.

Mammon narrows his eyes. "Wait a second, you are the one I saw that night after all."

"You seriously just realized that?" You can't believe it.

"W-well, I had my suspicions…" Mammon tries to hide it, but he literally just figured it out.

You laugh because he is so easy to figure out.

"Oi! Don't make fun of me!" He huffs in annoyance.

"I'm not. I laughed because you are cute sometimes." Saying this surprises you as much as him, but it's true.

Mammon looks like he is about to overheat. "I need to get goin." He practically runs away.

You can only shake your head at him.

[discotreque]

LwD 2.05: An Embarrassment of Dooplers

So I was a little nervous about this one! I hadn’t heard any spoiler-spoilers, but screeners have been out for weeks now, and I’d heard a bunch of individual, vague, non-spoilery hints about (1) big character moments, on the scale of a mid-season finale even though the show’s not taking a mid-season break; and (2) an ending that would make me cry.

I guess I imagined something relatively serious and dramatic, like “No Small Parts”? This show makes me cackle with laughter and giggle with nerdy glee and “d’awww!” at heartwarming friendships every week, but it’s only ever made me cry once—and then I was impressed that they were going to get there from the wacky hijinks we saw in the brief teaser.

The lack of a cold open made me apprehensive too—in my experience, that’s typically a sign that there’s so much plot in the rest of the episode that they need that extra scene—but after ~21.5 minutes of aforementioned hijinks, I was having so much fun that I’d completely forgotten about the alleged tear-jerker at the end…

…and they were not the tears I was expecting.

I didn’t think I’d be smiling and crying!!!! That was wholesome as SHIT!!!!!

I almost can’t believe they earned that—but they totally did.

After a Mariner–Tendi episode and a Boimler–Rutherford episode, we’re back to the “usual” Season 1 pairings… except the relationships between these characters have changed since Season 1. Mariner still feels thwacked in the abandonment issues by Boimler bailing for the Titan, and Rutherford’s having a tiny little existential crisis about losing an entire year of his life.

Both of which are extremely understandable and very heavy situations—and both of those situations get resolved because everyone in them is vulnerable with each other and honest about their feelings—AND that honesty and vulnerability brings both pairs of friends closer together. Are you kidding me?? I would watch SEVENTY seasons of that shit. Put it in my veins.

Onto the notes:

So basically Dooplers are Tribbles, but for cringe comedy instead of slapstick? Ohhhhh boy.

Look at Ransom the diplomat, tossing his own fork on the floor! I like that he’s actually a pretty competent Starfleet officer, despite also being a completely ridiculous person.

Wait a second, is that—OH HOLY SHIT, THE DOOPLERS ARE VOICED BY RICHARD KIND.

It makes sense that B. Boimler would find William annoying—who likes seeing their own flaws reflected back at them? And who could be a better reflection of one’s flaws than one’s literal duplicate?—but most interesting to me is that it implies on some level, Bradward knows the stick up his butt is a flaw. (Does William?)

Why does the Cerritos model have working phasers?!?!

I’m loving hot pink as the currently en-vogue colour for “dangerous sci-fi energy” in animation (cf. almost every previous episode of this show; Into the Spider-Verse; other stuff I can’t remember right now). As a former child of the 80’s, I’m living for it… but as a former teenager of the 90’s, I can’t help but wonder if it’s going to age as poorly as the harsh neon green of The Matrix, every Borg appearance on Voyager, and like 80% of the websites I made in high school…

SKANTS! SKANTS! SKANTS!

That fake-out joke with the fly-by over the Cerritos model was in the season trailer weeks ago, and I was so enthralled by that handsome lady that the sticker coming into frame still got me good 😂😂😂

BECKY Mariner????? omg yes

Some top-quality Boimler screams in this one. Poor Jack Quaid must drink gallons of throat-coat tea when he records.

One of the great things about Star Trek to me is that you never know what you’re going to get from any random episode. A murder mystery? A road trip? A spooky thriller? A cheesy romance? Broad comedy? Body horror? Didactic political screeds shrouded in tissue-thin science-fiction metaphors? Brain and brain, what is brain??? And after this many years of watching, you’d think I’d be hard to surprise. But if I ever told you I thought I’d see a Blues Brothers–style car chase through a frickin’ shopping mall on an episode of Star Trek, I would have been straight-up lying to you. I loved it, it worked for me, my jaw was on the floor and I was clapping with joy—but I’m definitely comfortable calling this one “unexpected.”

It’s CAPTAIN SHELBY!!! And an ancient babydyke crush rose from the depths of my childhood subconscious… (Also I think her Number One is based on the original makeup—eventually deemed too complicated—for Saru? Now that’s a deep cut.)

In 20th-century Trek, you almost never got to see what was going on inside a starship from the outside. Even after they switched from physical models (where it was next to impossible on a single episode’s budget) to CGI (which was still in its infancy, still not exactly cheap, and still broadcast in SD anyway), it was a rare thrill to see any meaningful interior details in an exterior shot. Disco’s modern VFX have given us some tasty, tasty treats in that department, but nothing quite as sublime as all the pink Doopler light glittering through the Cerritos’s windows.

Mariner says she’ll take her contact Malvus down with her, and threatens that they’ll end up “in the same cell.” Malvus is a Mizarian, a species introduced in TNG’s “Allegiance,” in which Captain Picard is held in a mysterious prison with one. I think I see what you did there, McMahan?

Bartender… so hot… lesbian circuits… overloading…

The Tendi and Rutherford C-story was, well, a C-story within a 22-minute episode, so there wasn’t much to it, but the one scene that mattered actually mattered a lot. I’m ambivalent on whether they should end up romantically involved—I’d prefer they don’t, but they’ll be one of the cutest couples in Trek history if they do—and as long as they keep that pure, sweet friendship between them at the heart of whatever else happens, I’m on board.

Carol Freeman was already one of my favourite captains before this season, and she’s been steadily moving up the list. The quiet throughline about her ambition to be on a better ship has been fascinating so far, and it’s starting to actually make me feel a little conflicted: I’m of course rooting for Captain Freeman to recognize her worth, make Starfleet recognize her worth, and become the ass-kicking captain of a hero ship that she’s clearly ready to be—but that almost surely means she’d be kicking ass off-screen, because LwD isn’t about those kind of adventures, and I’d be devastated not to have Dawnn Lewis on the show every week. So I’m kind of on the edge of my seat about this one!

I had so many favourite jokes this week I put them in a separate list:

“Even the replicated water on the Titan tasted better” is a low-key brilliant dunk on people who can’t shut the fuck up about the cooler places they used to live.

“Ooooh, they have a Quark’s now! That used to just be an empty lot where teens would make mistakes!” ← That’s literally me every time I go back to where I grew up. I felt so Seen™ I almost hid under a blanket.

“I would never go down the stairs!” (evil grin) (goes up the stairs)

The “well, shit” expressions from Mariner and Boimler as their crashed car sank right into the water… which started to bubble innocuously… and then the bottles of Data bubble-bath popped up, paying off a joke I thought had already been paid off—that was the one that woke up my poor cat this week. Just exquisite timing.

“YOUR PAGH IS WEAK, AND IT DISGUSTS ME!” “I don’t even know what that is, but I don’t like your tone!”

“Okona’s in there? He’s not even Starfleet! This is outrageous!” made me shout “NO!” at the screen like I was scolding my cat for scratching furniture. (She did not wake up that time.)

Best background joke: the neon sign at the dive bar advertising FREE SHOTS & BEERS. (Get it? Because they’re on a Federation starbase? Where nobody uses money?)

And of course Quark merchandised DS9.

This wasn’t just a standout episode of Lower Decks, this was a brilliant episode of Star Trek, period. The Dooplers, though extremely silly, are nevertheless also a clever sci-fi metaphor for real and relatable personal/interpersonal issues, and an effective plot catalyst for meaningful character growth from all four of our ensigns and the captain.

The jokes were hilarious, the action was kinetic, the A-, B-, and C-plots linked up thematically, the visuals were consistently and thoroughly gorgeous, the character beats—between Mariner and Boimler, Tendi and Rutherford, Mariner and Capt. Freeman—were all genuine, heartfelt and wholesome, and the references to other Trek canon were both deep and deeply affectionate.

Only 15 episodes in, and this series knows exactly what it is, exactly what it wants to do, and knows that it can knock our socks off doing it. Mike McMahan has said in recent interviews that the back half of S2 (and the apparently almost-fully-written S3) is a straight line uphill in quality from here—which surprised me at first, because McMahan seems like a pretty chill dude who doesn’t normally brag about his own work like that.

But then the Prophets sent me a vision of my space dad Ben Sisko, who reminded me of the words of 1930’s baseball player Dizzy Dean:

“If you can do it, it ain’t bragging.”

[Thanks to cygnus-x1.net for the screenshots this week—I was too lazy to do my own.]