#I’m at the playground watching the cool kids play it’s Normal

[reputationmunson]

Delicate | S.H x fem!reader

summary: Steve can’t figure out why he’s so upset that you, his best friend, is going on a date until Robin gives him a reality check

content: fluff, friends to lovers, use of y/n, she/her pronouns, probably too cheesy and cliche

word count: 2.9K

a/n: honestly i didn’t have the energy to proofread this sorry for any mistakes!

_

Every Friday night, you and Steve can be found watching a movie in his basement, curled up on the couch with every snack imaginable scattered around you. Yes, it’s simple, maybe even mundane to some, but there’s nowhere else the two of you would rather be. 

Steve has been your best friend since you were nine. You’d stuck by each other through everything. Even during his ‘king steve’ phase, you never strayed from him. Sure, things were different at that time, but you knew the sweet boy you met on the playground was still in there somewhere. He just needed someone to coax that side of him back out and that person just happened to be you. 

Everyone always speculated you two were more than friends. Your parents constantly joked that in a few years you’d be married with a house full of kids. Your friends always referred to you as ‘Mr. and Mrs. Harrington’, the kids called you ‘mom and dad’. Neither of you would correct anyone, but would laugh about it instead. 

Despite what literally everyone in your life thinks, nothing romantic has ever happened between the two of you. Sure, you were both touchy and cuddly, but that’s normal between two best friends. You also might’ve had a crush on him freshman year of high school, but quickly got over it when you realized those feelings would never be reciprocated. But, you were so wrong, you just didn’t know it yet. Neither did Steve. 

By the time the credits of the movie roll, you're half asleep with your head resting on his shoulder and his arm wrapped around you. You’ve never thought of the cuddling between you as being romantic. You just always felt so comfortable with Steve and he felt the same way around you. He had a way about him that made you feel safe and secure, like every time you were with him nothing bad could happen. 

“Hey” Steve whispers, his hand gently rubbing up and down your arm “do you wanna stay tonight?” 

“Mmhmm” you nod your head and look at him with a sleepy smile. “I’ll help you clean up” you offer and he shakes his head “We’ll clean up tomorrow. Who would steal all the blankets if you passed out from exhaustion down here?” he teases and you playfully roll your eyes and follow him up to his bedroom. “You’re the blanket thief and you know it, Harrington” 

You and Steve have shared a bed more times than you can count.  You’d fall asleep in his arms and wake up with your bodies intertwined. Sometimes, when he thinks you’re still asleep, he’ll press a soft kiss to your forehead. Which is normal for two people who were just friends… isn’t it?

“So, we got this move in at family video that looks super cheesy and awful. Wanna watch it tomorrow night?” he asks as you climb into bed next to him. “Oh, I meant to tell you about this earlier but I’m going on a date tomorrow!” you sound excited and he knows it sounds awful, but for some reason that makes his stomach churn. He tries to play it cool, anyway. 

“A date, huh? Who ya ditchin’ me for, babe?” babe. He always calls you ‘babe’ or ‘honey’ or any sickeningly sweet pet name that never fails to make you feel flustered. “Brad Mckinley” you tell him and Steve has to hold back a scoff. 

Brad McKinley? That asshole? Steve can’t believe you’d give him a second of your time, let alone a date. 

“Really? He’s like a huge douchebag” 

“How do you know? you go on a date with him?” you taunt. 

“He wishes he could get a date with a babe like me. But, c’mon, seriously? He comes into the store all the time with a new girl on his arm and always acts like he’s, I don’t know, better than me. When did he even ask you out?” 

“A few days ago. We were both at the supermarket and I almost ran into him in the parking lot with my shopping cart, so I apologized and he said he’d forgive me if I went on a date with him. I thought that was cute and thought he was ever cuter, so i said yes” 

Wow, what a line, Steve thinks to himself. “Isn’t he known for having sex with girls and never talking to them again?”

“Steve, this is the first date I'm going on in forever. I don’t really get asked out often. Can’t you be happy for me?” 

You do get asked out often, just not directly. Sometimes you and Steve will be out somewhere and guys will come up to him and once he says you aren’t his girlfriend, they try to get him to be his wingman. Steve always comes up with an excuse so they don’t talk to you, but now when you aren’t around, he’s started telling them that you are his girlfriend. He tells himself he only does it to protect, not because he wants you to be his girlfriend. That would be crazy. 

“If you’re happy then I am, I guess. Anyways, i’m like super fucking tired. let’s go to bed” you can’t tell if his tone is from being upset or tired, but you brush it off and close your eyes after curling up to him and telling him goodnight. 

Steve doesn’t sleep much that night. He’s too worried about you. You’re loving and shy. Soft spoken and kind. Sometimes too kind. He worries your kindness might be taken advantage of and he refuses to let that happen. Ever.

_ 

Saturday rolls around and Steve has been sulking all day. He was a little awkward with you this morning before you left. You tried to ask him multiple times if he was okay before you left and he blamed his behavior on being tired, so you let it go. When you left, he told you to have fun on your date, but it came out more sarcastic than intended. 

“What is your deal, dude? You have a look on your face like someone stuck a lemon in your mouth while you were sleeping” Robin says and Steve’s brows furrow more than they have been all day. “What the hell does that even mean?”

“It means that you’re acting weird. Weirder than usual” she states and Steve sighs “y/n is going on a date” 

“And that’s a problem because you’re in love with her? Right?”

“I am not in love with her! She’s going on a date with Brad Mckinley and I’m just worried about her. As a friend” He adds the last part to make himself perfectly clear, but Robin still isn’t convinced. “You’re jealous” she states as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. Which it is to everyone, but Steve. 

“That’s crazy. She’s my best friend”

“No. I’m your best friend. She’s your girlfriend without the label”

“That’s ridiculous. She-” Steve starts to defend himself, but Robin interrupts him. “No, it’s not. Just think about it, okay? You two cuddle all the time, you hold her hand when she’s feeling nervous, and you let her touch your precious hair but if anyone else tried to do that you’d swat their hand away. That’s all boyfriend and girlfriend stuff. She even sits on your lap, your lap, Steve.” 

He’s left speechless. He’s not in love with you, is he? Steve knows his friendship with you isn’t as conventional as others, but neither of you thought it was unusual. If anything, it would be unnatural if there were no innocent touches between the two of you or glances at each other from across the room that resulted in what can only be described as lovesick smiles. Steve thinks he’d die if he could never hold you again the way he does now. But, you’re going on a date. With someone else. 

This guy could end up being your boyfriend who will get to be the one to hold you, you’ll play with his hair, and grab his hand in a crowded room when you’re feeling overwhelmed and Steve will have to watch from the sidelines, wishing that was him. Fuck, he wants that to be him. Forever. 

“Holy shit, you’re realizing it aren’t you?” Robin grins and Steve feels the past twelve years of feelings he’s repressed and dismissed come crashing down on him all at once. He’s been so hopelessly and desperately in love with you all this time and it terrifies him. You are the best thing that's ever happened to him. What if he loses you? He couldn’t bear not having you in his life. He’d never recover. 

“Holy shit” he breathes out “I love her. I’m fucking in love with her. Why didn’t you guys tell me!” he shouts. Good thing the store was dead. “We thought you knew!” she shouts back. “You have to tell her. Like, immediately” 

“I can’t do that” he grumbles, feeling defeated before he’s already tried. “What if she doesn’t feel the same? I mean, I know she doesn’t. There's no way”

“You cannot be that much of an idiot. Do you not see the way she looks at you? You should hear the way she talks about you when you’re not around. Last week when you were late to the get together because you had to work, she was all worried and kept asking what time it was. We could literally talk about ice cubes and she’d find a way to relate the story to you. It’s kinda nauseating, but cute, too” 

“You really think she feels the same way?” Steve lights up at the thought of there being even a one percent chance that you love him the way he loves you. “It’s sort of hard to not pick up on when I’ve been watching you idiots make heart eyes at each other every time we all hang out. When does she leave for her date?” Steve checks his watch “An hour. I don’t get off work for three hours, so that’s just great” he complains. 

“I’ll cover for you. Go get your girl”

_ 

Steve races to your house. Speed limit be damned, he’s not letting anything stop him. His shaky hands grip the steering wheel and he’s so nervous that he’s debated stopping a couple times to puke on the side of the road. 

What is he even going to say to you? ‘Hey, I know you’re going on a date but I’ve been in love with you for most of my life. Wanna be my girlfriend?’yeah, that’s not gonna cut it. You deserve flowers, or a poem, or a goddamn flashmob, but, unfortunately, he doesn’t exactly have the time to get a group together for a choreographed dance that declares his feelings, so he’ll have to rely on speaking from the heart. That shouldn’t be too difficult…right?

Despite being on a time limit, he’s been sitting outside your house for ten minutes. He can’t seem to move. The fear of rejection and all of this happening so fast has his head spinning. Robin's words echo in his mind and he musters up just enough courage to find his way to your front door, knocking frantically. 

“Steve? Shouldn’t you be at work?” your voice is shaky and your eyes are red. You’ve been crying. He’s going to fucking kill that guy. “y/n, what’s wrong?” his eyes soften and his heart constricts. You invite him inside and he follows you to the living room, taking a seat next to you.

“Um, Brad cancelled our date because Missy Tucker asked him out” you laugh, humourlessly. Steve is furious and hates to see you upset, but he can’t help but take this as a sign. Here he was, prepared to stop you from going on that date and all along the universe was on his side. He’s gonna have to send Missy Tucker a thank you card right after he eggs Brad’s beloved car. 

“Shit, babe. I’m sorry.” his arm drapes around your shoulder and you melt into his touch. “It’s fine. I didn’t think he was my soulmate or anything. I just wanted to feel pretty and wanted, I guess” you nervously fiddle with Steve’s hand, feeling embarrassed at your admission. 

Steve gently grabs your hand, giving it a soft squeeze. “You are pretty and you are wanted” 

“I don’t think I am” you whisper. “Are you kidding? You’re the prettiest girl in Hawkins. Shit, probably the world. The nicest, too. You’re always there for me, even when I was an asshole and I don’t know if I’ve ever even thanked you for that. Oh, and you’re funny too, like in a really witty way ‘cause you’re so smart-”

“Steve” you interrupt his endearing ramble “thank you, but you have to say those things. You’re my best friend” 

He positions himself on the couch so he can look at you, putting his hand under your chin to tilt your head up so he can see your beautiful eyes. When he looks at you, it’s like he's seeing you for the first time. You aren’t just the girl he met a recess that’s been attached to his hip ever since. You’re the girl that makes him feel on top of the world whenever he’s with you. You’re the girl whose touch makes him putty in your hands. You’re who he sees a future with and he can’t believe it took him this long to figure out. 

“Best friend or not, it’s true. All of it” he promises. “Then why has no one ever loved me? Like, been in love with me.”

“You’re wrong” he insists. “Like, really wrong” he huffs out a laugh and you give him a puzzled expression. “When you told me about your date I felt kinda weird about it and I thought I was just being a good friend, ya know? But I think it’s more than that…” 

You feel like you’ve stopped breathing. Is he going to say what you think he is? You never thought that he’d feel this way about you. You always believe the feelings you held for him were one-sided, so you pushed it down and replaced them with gentle touches and acts of kindness in hopes that maybe those things could lead to more, but they never did. Not until now. 

“What do you mean?” you ask softly. “Isn’t it obvious?”

“I want you to tell me. I need to hear it, Steve. Please” 

He takes a deep breath before speaking up again “I wanna give you the huge declaration you deserve. Something like standing outside your window with a boombox and a dozen flowers that are as pretty as you, but I don’t have any of that. I could sing though, if you want?” he jokes and you giggle. “Not necessary. I, um, could go first if you’re nervous” you suggest, even though you don’t think you’ve ever been so nervous in your life. “Yeah, I’d like that”

“I love you, Steve. In fact, I can’t remember a time in my life when I didn’t love you. I don’t need an over the top announcement. I just need to know you feel the same way” You keep your confession simple because the only thing you want to do is shout from the top of your lungs how much you love him. 

“I love you too. So much that it’s crazy and scares me a little. I even accidentally flew past a stop sign on my way over here”

“You did not’’ you gasp. “I did and I’d do it again. For you” 

He’s looking at you like he has a million times before, but this time it’s different. His eyes flicker down to your lips and you do the same. “Can you kiss me, Stevie?” Fuck, he loves it when you call him that. It makes him weak in the knees, just like everything else that you do.

He lays a hand on your cheek and gives you the cutest grin you’ve ever seen. You both lean in and when he kisses you, you feel lightheaded and giddy. Neither of you can stop smiling, making it difficult to kiss and you both laugh. 

“Stop smiling, goof. I wanna kiss you” he whines. “I can’t help it! I’m too happy” you squeal and he practically tackles you, overwhelmed with joy. You lay on the couch with him on top of you, his weight slightly crushing you, but you wouldn’t have it any other way. “Wanna try again?” he nose nudges yours and you cradle his head to gently pull him closer to you as his lips glide over yours in a perfect balance. 

Of course, there’s sparks and fireworks, but you also feel at peace. This kiss feels like coming home. You’re right where you’ve always meant to be. 

“Do you wanna be my girl?” he asks once he slightly pulls back from you. His face is still very close to yours and you swear that his eyes are shimmering. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted” 

Steve tells you at least one hundred times that night that he loves you and you tell him the same. You don’t think you’ll ever get tired of hearing or saying those three words. They just sound so beautiful being muttered in between endless kisses. 

_

the end

_

[drinkabletoxicdishsoap]

HAIII IM BACK LIKE I PROMISED HERES MY WINN BULLSHIT LORE

winn was superrrrr close to their mom before she died, she worked as a hair dresser for abit and then as a security guard at pattys and would take them to work when younger so they were very distraught when she died due to medical complications, emmet was a family friend and elijahs long time best friend from high school so they got married a little after her death (yes its suspicious and yes elijah mightve cheated while she was alive yes this is more convoluted then it should be) the cousins arent relevant at all, and yes charlottes name is a fnaf refrence i couldnt pass up the oppertunity

ignore the fucking . "missing since 2007" thing cuz its apart of that one au i mentioned i never talk abt anymore so it wouldnt fit into canon but tldr thats nick of time shes gone bananas dont worry about it (i had a fic in the worlds in like august . i still have the doc open incase i want to finish it since its halfway done but i cant write rn i can only do 1 hobby at a time #sad) also their maternal grandmama is a fucking asshole so who cares

(zipper is a border collie if u gaf......... btw)

I was going to make a separate Winn headcanon post but since you shared this beautiful family tree with me I want to share my headcanons about them!!

TYSM FOR SHARING ITT RAGHH ITS AMAZING AND YES I DO GAF !! THESE ARE SO COOL I LOVE LOVE YOUR HEADCANONS ABOUT THEIR MOM

If I do think of more, I’ll either reblog, edit, or reply!! I’m sorry if they’re out of character or it seems like I’m projecting

they listen to 80’s Japanese city pop!! please tell me someone else sees it and I’m not crazy 💔💔 I probably am oh well maybe it’s because im listening to that genre right now

following up with the music headcanons, I feel they would listen to a lot of bands. Not any certain kind of genre, they just love listening to bands :3 (weezer fan…)

hip hop listener

amusement park enthusiast

maybe it’s only because of the patty possum episode but I feel like they love arcades

GUITAR PLAYER THROUGH AND THROUGH TRUSTTTTTT!! ONE OF THEIR DREAMS IS TO START A BAND I SWEAR

lowkey a fnaf kid. Idk the patty possum episode reminds me a lot of security breach

has a lot of stress and anxiety problems but hides it because they don’t want to upset their friends

whenever they get a new interest, they dive deep into the lore

Minecraft kid.. watched a lot of Minecraft YouTubers (the ones who aren’t groomers I promise)

if I have to give them a style, it’s either grunge or Adam Sandler fits, no in between

listens to music A LOT to help them calm down. basically one of their coping mechanisms

always begged their parents to get them those playgrounds you build in your backyard

LOVES comic books!!!!

LOVES superhero movies as well

sonic fan

plays the pokemon games.. i think they’ve played every gen.. their favorite is black and white

card collector!!!

when it comes to vacation, they love going on excursions and exploring :3

I think they would enjoy gravity falls and adventure time.. maybe I’m projecting though my bad

I don’t know if anyone has read it but you know survivors? yeah I feel like they would love that but maybe that’s just me maybe I fever dreamed that

their favorite animals are bugs. They don’t discriminate they love all and any kind of bugs

they go to skate parks a lot ! They love helping out with people who are struggling with skating or just love hanging out with fellow skaters

very outdoorsy

they love action movies and games

I feel like they played a lot of the Mario franchise

SPLATOON FAN I SWEARRRRRR

I feel like they would love going to farms

posters everywhere in their room

Likes to hang out at roller skate rinks

graphic tees.. they’re so normal about graphic tees

pin and keychain collector

an anime kid but only for like the action animes. Mainly attack on Titian

plays basketball for fun

owns like 100 slinkys

That’s it 🤯 sorry it’s super long :d thank you so much for coming to another yap session! I hope you have a great day/night to whoever is reading this. thank you for sharing your family tree as well! If anyone has any more headcanons, feel free to share in my inbox, reblogs, or replies!!

[1mnobodywhoareyou]

Okay but serious question: What's your favourite dinosaur? and Reggie?

Thank you! This got Bex versed because of @narcissusbrokenmirror who also asked for it: 11."Okay but serious question: What's your favourite dinosaur?" For the bex verse

Reggie is delighted as he pushes Bex on the swing. She’s giggling as she soars through the air.

“Higher! Higher!”

He grabs the chains on either side of her and runs underneath the swing as he pushes. She screeches with glee. His cheeks hurt from smiling so widely. 

Normally Alex gets to take her to the playground so he doesn’t get this time with her but he cherishes it when he gets the chance. 

“All done!” Bex calls down to him. He catches the swing and helps her out. He sets her down on the ground, watching as she runs toward the small slide at the other end of the playground.

“You’re new,” an unexpected voice says from beside him.

He turns to them, a confused look on his face. “Hi?”

“Sorry, normally she’s here with someone else,” they nod toward Bex who is now digging in the gravel with another kid about her age. “I’m Candace. That one’s mom.”

“Ah, yeah,” he replies with realization, “normally her dad brings her but I’m the lucky one today!”

“It’s nice, right? Watching them be free?”

Reggie nods, “Yeah.”

The two of them watch the kids play while they chat. They’re interrupted occasionally when one of the kids calls for their attention or help, but they manage to hold a solid conversation. He learns that she’s a stay-at-home parent and the playground offers a bit of a reprieve. She learns that he’s a part-time student, soaking up his Bex time when he can. He doesn’t divulge anything about the band or their family, treading carefully around those topics. They had decided that the public didn’t need to know the details of their relationships or Bex’s parentage and while most of them aren’t recognizable in public, especially alone, it’s better to be safe than sorry. Though she doesn’t miss the way Bex calls him Papa.

“Okay but serious question,” Reggie says during a lull in their conversation. She turns a raised eyebrow his way. “What’s your favourite dinosaur?” 

Candace laughs. “That’s a tough one. He’d want me to say a T-Rex, of course,” she says, pointing toward her son. “But I think I’m fond of the plesiosaur.”

“That’s not a dinosaur,” he responds cheekily. 

She rolls her eyes playfully, “Okay, what’s yours?”

“She’d not care at all what my favourite is, but spinosaurus is my current top answer.”

“Oh, did you manage to somehow escape the dinosaur fascination stage?”

Reggie pouts, “Yes. Unfortunately. The little weirdo is into bugs and plants.”

Candace chuckles. “Well, what’s her favourite bug, then?”

“At this exact moment and other than the house fly?”

Another laugh, “Yeah.”

“Ants.”

Candace shakes her head with amusement. “And yours?”

“Well, based on the books we’ve been able to get from the library so far? The Brazilian Treehopper.”

“I’ve… never even heard of that.”

Reggie laughs, “Yeah, it’s a new one for me too. There are some cool bugs out there! Who knew?”

“Entomologists, probably.”

“You just… know that word off the top of your head?”

She offers a sly smile, “You have your secrets, I have mine.”

He lets out an involuntary chuckle, “Fair, fair. Well, I’ve got to get the little munchkin back home. Nice to meet you, Candace!”

“You too, Reggie. See you around.”

He walks over to the kids and crouches down to speak to Bex. It only takes a moment, and a casual reminder that her Unca ‘Uke is at home, for her to agree to leaving. They wave goodbye as they walk down the street hand in hand.

[double-detonation]

Double Detonation Chapter 2

It has been about four months since we started preschool. Honestly, it has been better than I thought it would. The work is barely work, and I can use it the rest of the time to sleep or do whatever I want. The teachers also have been praising me for my so-called intelligence, even if it was just my past memories. They made sure to point it out to my mother when she picked us up. For doing so well, Mom would sometimes take me out for dessert. I think she saw it as a Mother-Daughter bonding session of how she was always excited for them, and I wasn’t going to say no to some free ice cream. Though, Katsuki seemed a little peeved by not being allowed to go on these outings and started seeing it as a competition. He would rub it in my face if he got a higher score than me, which only happened when we were learning Japanese. Learning a whole new language was a bit difficult for me. Perhaps I should have watched anime Sub rather than Dub. After a while, I was getting annoyed by the taunting and just asked Mom if we could bring him along, which seemed to upset her slightly but she agreed without much thought. It made Katsuki happy, so that was fine by me. 

Currently, we are having recess, so I’m just relaxing on my favorite bean bag chair. This thing is a lot more comfortable than the ones I had in America. I swear, just jumping into those things felt like landing in a pile of rocks. I thought to myself as I snuggled further into the seat. I closed my eyes and was about to fall asleep. That was, before someone jumped into the chair next to me, launching me in the air a few feet, making my eyes widen.

“What the heck!” I screeched, landing back on the cushion, and hearing a familiar laugh from my brother. “You should have seen your face!” He continued to laugh, grinning at me.

“Oi…do you have to be so loud,” I grumbled, trying to push him off. He wasn’t having any of that though, grabbing my hand and dragging me onto my feet. Ugh gross, why are his hands so sweaty? I cringed inside, I hated the feeling of being sweaty or sticky. “You sleep too much, come on I wanna show you something!” I groan as I let myself be drug outside, Katsuki pulling me to his group of friends. I don’t know his friends too well. I do recognize them though as his lackeys from the show, so I already wasn’t too fond of them when he first introduced me to them. 

“You gotta see this Kazu!” Katsuki sounded excited as he stood in front of the boys with his signature smirk, raising his hands. He then punched his hands together, a small explosion bursts from the palm of his hand. My eyes widened slightly at the sight. Has his quirk manifested already? No wonder why his hands were so fucking sweatier than normal. Hearing a couple of gasps around the playground, kids start to form a group around us.

“Wow, you got your quirk already!” One commented. “That is such a cool quirk!” They were endlessly praising my brother and he was soaking it all in, a bit too well. His hands were on his hips and his head was raised a little higher with pride. “I know right? I got the best quirk here!”

I rolled my eyes at his remark. Great, his ego train has just left the station. Noticing the green blob known as Midoriya poking his way through the crowd, the boy beams at Katsuki.

“Waah, you’re so cool Kaachan! I hope to get a quirk just as cool as yours!” 

Katsuki and his friends looked at him, then scoffed. “Yeah right Midoriya, in your dreams! No one will get a quirk as cool as mine.” He said as he glanced at me, I frowned. “Well, maybe besides my sister, but definitely not you!” His lackeys laugh and they walk off with some of the other kids to play with their new quirks. I looked over at Midoriya, seeing him holding the bottom of his shirt tightly with quivering lips. God damn it Katsuki. I sighed, walking closer to him.

“Ignore my brother Izuku, I’m sure you’ll get an amazing quirk too,” I said to him, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder, making him flinch slightly. He looks up at me with uncertainty in his eyes.

“I-If you say so Kazuchan…”

It’s been a few weeks since Katsuki got his quirk. Mom and Dad couldn’t be prouder of him as he continued to learn how to use his powers. Mom kept an eye on me more recently though, unsure of the reason why but who cares? Katsuki and I did find out that Midoriya was diagnosed as quirkless the other day. Was Mom worried I’d turn out quirkless as well? Did I even want a quirk? I’ve lived my previous life without one just fine, but then again it was normal there. I groan as the beam of sunlight hits my face. I sluggishly got up from the bed and dragged myself into the bathroom. I pushed the stepping stool in front of the sink and climbed on top of it. Ugh, it was really hot last night, I hated it so much. I feel all sweaty… I grumbled as I turned the faucet on, running my hands under the cool water. Closing my eyes, I splashed some water onto my face. Reaching for one of the towels. Before I could grab one, I lost my footing on the stool and slipped.

“AAH!” stretching my arms out in front of me to break my fall before a small explosion emerged from my hands, propelling me back onto my feet for a second before I fell back down again from the shock. My eyes widen in fear as I stare at the scorch marks on the floor. The bathroom door bursts open with Mom rushes toward me. “Kazumi!” She shouts, sliding on the ground to sit in front of me. “Are you okay baby, what happened!?” I started up at her, slightly shaking. Not long after, Dad and Katsuki came in as well with concern in their eyes. Katsuki frowns as he follows my gaze. Seeing the singe marks, the worry on his face melts into pure happiness.

“Mom I think Kazu just got her quirk!” He says happily, running to sit next to me, pointing at the burnt floor behind her. Mitsuki looks at it before turning back to me, cupping my hands with her bigger ones. “Is that true, did you hurt yourself at all, sweetie?” She says softly, opening her hands to look at mine, and rubbing her thumbs against them. I look up at her, then back at Katsuki.

“N-No I’m not hurt…I fell and I was gonna hit the floor but my hands exploded, pushing me back.” I shuddered, still shaken by what happened. My hands feel numb right now. Is this normal when you use your quirk? Mom sighs in relief. “That's good, I’m glad you are not hurt. It looks like Katsuki is right, seems like your quirk has come in dear.” She smiles at me. Dad chuckles and walks over to us, kneeling down as well.

“I told you, you didn’t have anything to worry about dear. She’s got an amazing quirk, just like her brother. Mitsuki sighs. “I know, and I’m glad for her.” So they were worried about the possibility of me being quirkless. I stared at the floor and then back at Dad. “Sorry that I ruined the floor…”

“Don’t worry about it kiddo, accidents happen.”

Going back to school was hell now that I had a quirk. Kids were starting to pay attention to me more after Katsuki declared us the Explosion Twins or something stupid like that when he told everyone I got the same quirk as him. Maannnn, I miss my quiet time. I sighed as I pushed away from another group of loud kids who wanted me to play with them. I also HATE the fact that our quirk makes me sweat so much. I feel like I’m constantly running to the bathroom to wash up. I literally just cleaned myself and I can already feel the nitroglycerin-like sweat building up on my skin. I continue walking around the playground, with my hands stuffed inside my pockets, until I pass by the sandbox. Noticing my brother and his friend were surrounding a rather beaten-up Izuku sitting next to some scorched sand. I growled as I walked up to them, hearing their annoying laughter. “You’re such a useless Deku!” I heard Katsuki bark out as he raised one of his hands.

“That is enough Katsuki!” I yelled as I moved myself in front of Izuku. My brother’s eyes widen slightly in disbelief seeing me blocking one of his hits making him and his cronies back up a bit.

“What are you doing Kazu, why are you always defending Deku from me? You should be on my side!” Izuku whimpers and hugs his knees, scooting a bit away from us, not wanting to get into any more trouble. I look back at the frightened green bean, then back at my brother, my vermillion red eyes burning into his own.

“I have always been on your side ‘Suki, but I can’t watch from the sidelines while you bully Izuku with your quirk!” Katsuki growls, glaring at me, then to Midoriya. “Fine, whatever, I don’t see why you protect that nerd anyway…” He grumbles and walks away with his friends.

I look at Midoriya, frowning as I watch him tremble in his spot. I walk over, step into the sandbox, and sit next to him, Izuku flinches as I do so. He glances at me and starts to cry. I sigh, pulling him into a quick and gentle hug. I stay with him for a while, rubbing his back gently until he starts to calm down. I hear him sniffle and feel him move his head slightly. I remove my arm from him and look at him. “You okay Izuku?”

Midoriya looks at me, sniffling again as he rubs his cheek to clear his tears. “I-I’m okay…W-Why did you help me.” He mutters quietly. “H-He’s your brother, you shouldn’t be fighting with him because of me.” I stared at him.

“I did that because you are my friend Izuku, and…that is what heroes do.”

[every-eye-evermore]

(Saw the artist was looking for an image description in the comments and I need practice so here’s my go)

A 2 page comic drawing in an expressive cartoony style with bright, textured colors.

It’s titled Weird Girl, a comic by Scout Forester.

Panel 1, a closeup of three kids excitedly watching a praying mantis. The first little girl is a representation of the artist, Scout’s, younger self, she is pale with red hair and freckles and wears green overalls. The other two are a girl with medium brown skin, braided hair, and glasses, and a boy with light skin, short blond hair, and braces.

Panel 2, a fourth kid stands behind the trio shouting “Hey! Shrimps!”. For now, we can only see part of his body and his shadow, looming over the kids who look back at him with expressions that could either be confusion or fear. Now we can see we’re on a playground, on the yellow bridge of a brightly colored play structure.

Panel 3, a reverse shot showing the bully’s face. He’s older than the other kids, he has a brown mullet and wears a shirt with a logo for “Big Dog Trucking” on it. He sneers down at them with crossed arms and continues talking “Don’t ya know we’re playin’ boys vs. girls right now? Why’re ya’ll weirdos just sittin’ around? Are y’all scared? Y’all chicken?”

Panel 4 is more zoomed out, the dramatic lighting is gone and the bully looks less intimidating. Scout says “Um, we don’t wanna play that. We’re busy.” The blond boy continues “We’re watchin’ a prayin’ mantis here, it’s real cool.”

Panel 5, a closeup on the bully’s face, red and upset. He shouts “Sh- Shut up! I’m big and you’re small, so I can make you play with me!”

Panel 5, a closeup of Scout as she looks back at the bully with determination.

Page 2, Panel 1, a closeup of Scout with her eyes closed, deep in concentration. The background is pure black with a faint glow emanating from around Scout.

Panel 2 is now drawn in a more detailed black and white style, imitating a fighting manga. Scout opens her eyes, which are red and intense, as she says “Spirit of the pachycephalosaurus.” A pachycephalosaurus is drawn next to her in a realistic style, with bolts of white lightning shooting from it.

Panel 3 is back to the comic’s normal style, a small reaction shot of the bully with simplified dot eyes. He says “Wait, what-“

Panel 4 is at a dramatic angle, looking up at Scout as she rams head first into the bully. He falls back, eyes bulging out as she takes him down.

based on a true story

(side note, it's very euphoric drawing my kid self as a girl! i'll have to do more of this!)

[metropolitianmania]

sometimes i feel so disconnected to my peers because i never really got to experience the internet the way they did. i’m 18 and yet despite having access to the internet for 7 years, i still feel like the little kid on the playground, trying to fit in with my peers who got to play FNAF together and watch youtube and cartoons whenever they liked while I had to wait until my dad left to coach baseball to watch cartoons, and even then, nothing i liked was cool.

i didn’t grow up on social media and now i can’t even look at people my age without feeling stupid.

how dare I stay bound to physical media in this digital world.

i wish i wasn’t born in a poor, abusive home. i wish i got to go to birthday parties and the mall with my friends and not have my social media surveilled (even though it was my fault that happened). i wish the kids that called me their friend didn’t bully me the way they did. i wish i could’ve been normal to my peers. God. i miss how abundant life felt when i was 7 years old.

[lindsaywesker]

Good morning! I hope you slept well and feel rested? Currently sitting at my desk, in my study, attired only in my blue towelling robe, enjoying my first cuppa of the day. Welcome to Throwback Thursday!

Many thanks to everyone that contributed to WEDNESDAY WORDS. Thanks to those that read and leave a ‘like’ or ‘love’. As you can see, some contributions really resonate with people. Yesterday’s winner was Jay Ben-Lew with, “The struggle is very real. Give yourself some credit because it aint pretty out there. Know that you are not alone and someone somewhere is proud of you.” Again, this quote is not attributed to anyone specific, it is just ‘internet wisdom’, but I suspect we all feel it. The struggle is very real. Painfully real. The question is: why is life such a struggle? And, who made it such a struggle? Was it a person? Or an economic philosophy? Or do we over-think things and sabotage our own lives?

On this page, ‘Throwback Thursday’ is all about memories. So, what do you remember? If I was to say the word WORK what immediately comes to mind?

I was thinking about work the other day. Being self-employed totally alters the concept of work. When you’re employed, you have a set salary and set work hours. If you put in extra hours, it’s unlikely to be noticed and it won’t affect your salary. Only very progressive companies reward effort and attitude. Most companies reward people that cause the least fuss and toe the company line a.k.a. the arse-lickers. Most employees clock-watch and take every possible opportunity to get out of doing any work at all. Most companies would not look out of place in the Victorian era. It’s a dysfunctional work force in a dysfunctional world. Of course, when you’re working for yourself, you have no work hours. If you don’t work, no money is earned and no bills get paid. The more you put in, the more you get out. You end-up working 10 and 12-hour (from 7.00 – 7.00) and it seems quite normal. Sometimes, my work day will stretch from 7.00 a.m. until 11.00 p.m. with lunch and dinner breaks thrown in. Sometimes, my son will ask on Friday, “Is your work day over?” because he wants me to order, pay and pick up the Chinese. In truth, my work day is NEVER over! NEVER! There are always tasks that need doing. These days, I work until I feel that fuzzy, can’t- concentrate feeling; I reach this point where I know there’s no point trying to do anything meaningful. And, at that point, I don’t watch TV, I just say to The Trouble, “I’ll see you upstairs. I’m going to bed.” I get into bed and fall straight to sleep. I always obey my body.

So, on this Throwback Thursday, what kind of memories, thoughts or emotions does the word WORK conjure up for you?

Yesterday was a very enjoyable day. Got most of my work finished by 4.00, which allowed me to go out for a walk. Shock horror! At 4.00 pm, the sun had gone down but it was still very warm. We all pay huge council tax bills and bitch about it but, yesterday, I enjoyed and appreciated my council tax bill. It gave me great pleasure to provide young, local families with a day’s worth of free entertainment. As most of you know, occupying the kids during the summer holiday is exhausting and expensive. In a cool, multi-purpose place like Roundwood Park, the kids can play in the playground, run, jump, ride their bikes, scream and shout to their heart’s content, and the mums can sit on a blanket, eat homemade food and spend the whole day laughing and chatting, while keeping a mindful eye on the kids. Perfect! On such days, I am proud to be a tax payer because I am contributing to so much happiness. No, my bank account is not in some offshore account so I don’t have to pay any tax. I work hard and I’m happy to pay tax because (sometimes) it's put to good use.

Have a throbbing and thrusting Thursday (with hopefully a few thrills through your thoroughfare?) I love you all.

[dorefasolsido]

10.

***credits to the original creator***

Look out of the nearest window. What do you see? Details, please.

I see the sky and some clouds, a bunch of really tall trees from the nearby park, several apartment buildings on the other side of the park, kids playing on the playground, my building’s parking lot and the neighbours’ cars.

When you think of the word "posh", what springs to mind?

A really fancy British person sitting near a golf course and sipping tea as they laugh in rich. I know posh people aren’t always British, but it can’t be helped.

When you have chocolate, do you eat it room temperature?

Normally yes.

Or are you like me and stick the bar into the fridge first?

Not always, unless the chocolate’s melted already to a degree. Then I have to put it in the fridge for a bit.

What's the most shocking thing that's happened in your part of town?

Well, I don’t know about here, but in my hometown the most shocking thing recently was that a guy shot his ex-wife in the middle of the street at like 9 AM in the morning. That’s super unusual since my hometown is pretty small and uneventful.

Which brand are your headphones/earbuds?

Idk honestly, they’re just some random ones my sister got me.

Do you see planes fly over your house at all?

Oh yeah, I see and hear them a lot.

Are there any constellations you recognize just by looking at them?

My dad showed me a few so I think I would recognize some. That is, if I could see the stars here.

Which room of your house/apartment do you spend the most time in?

The living room.

Which insect do you find the most beautiful?

Butterflies are so pretty.

Did you have crafts/woodwork at school growing up?

Kinda, only we did woodwork only like once or twice, so it wasn’t a class solely dedicated to that.

If so, what was the best assignment you did for it?

I honestly can’t remember what we did, and I’m pretty sure we all made the same generic things.

Do you have a friend who likes to tell you everything?

Yup, a little too much sometimes.

What was the last thing you got very excited about?

Princess Mononoke viewing in an open-air cinema. A friend was supposed to go with me, and I haven’t seen her in a few months so I was looking forward to it. Unfortunately, she had to cancel, but I went anyway on my own. It was still pretty cool, but not as cool as it would’ve been if she’d come.

You can go to any city in any country you want. Which city do you go to?

Tokyo. Take me there right away pleaaaase T.T

Do you like gardening? If so, what do you grow?

I don’t, but I have a theory that most people start gardening the moment they turn 50 or so. That happened to my mum and to a bunch of her friends -- they all love gardening and share tips on it all the time. So, maybe my time will come in like 30ish years.

Do you enjoy puzzle games? If so, which one's your favourite?

Yeees, but I like puzzles in video games the most. Especially horror games with puzzles. Because then you’re stressed, but you also gotta think, so it’s exciting.

Is there a substance you avoid at all costs? If so, what is it and why?

I mean, most drugs? Buut one I would 100% stay away from always is heroin. No thanks.

What would you love to live next door to?

A lake, river, or some kind of water. Water just brings me peace.

What gives you nostalgia?

Music, cartoons, and TV shows I used to watch when I was a kid usually. Also, inexplicably, Spring Day by BTS, even though I heard it for the first time last year.

What's the best thing about fall?

The nature is probably at its prettiest in the fall.

What's the worst thing about fall?

Tbh, can’t think of anything in particular. Especially since we barely even have proper fall here anymore and it’s usually still sunny and warm.

Do you get cold easily? Or are you constantly hot?

Neither, actually.

When you think of a classy drink, what comes to mind first?

Some fancy whiskey.

Do you prefer eating out or cooking your own meals?

I don’t cook, so eating out.

Which language do you think is the most complicated to learn?

Okay, so clearly there’s no right answer here, but for me personally, French always seemed impossible to learn. It’s not that the grammar is very difficult or anything, it’s just that they shorten literally everything and it’s quite a task to understand wtf the French are saying. Like the language sounds really pretty, but... yeah, I’ll stick to my harsh German.

Is there a place that you might call your second home?

Sure.

How do you imagine your later life to look like?

Just me travelling around the world, working from various cool places... now that would be the dream.

What is a job you would never in a million years want to do?

Hmmmm, only sex work comes to mind. No hate to those who do, but I’d be waaaaaay out of my comfort zone.

Is there a piece of jewelry that you feel naked without?

My earrings.

Do you ever "go commando"?

Nope.

Do you ever try to make words out of number sequences you see?

Sometimes it happens, but it’s not something I actively try to do.

What's the sweetest thing someone's done for you?

Once when I was visiting my friends and relatives in Germany, one of the friends organized a surprise day of activities for my birthday. Each of them began with a little riddle that was supposed to give me a hint where we were going, and once we made it there, I’d receive a little wish for my birthday. We were unfortunately late for several activities so had to skip them, but nevertheless, it was a super cute thing to do and tbh, I probably don’t deserve that.

Which wild animals are a common sight in your area?

Crows.

What's the weirdest building in your city?

Not sure.

How do you keep in touch with friends usually?

Messaging apps, I meet with some fairly frequently.

Do you get a lot of visitors?

Nah, I live kinda far. Plus, I prefer to meet people in the city, there’s just more to do.

Do you recognize friends'/family's vehicles by sound?

Hmm, I think I can recognize our family car when it drives into the driveway.

Which Disney villain is your favourite?

I think most Disney villains are so cool, but maybe Scar if I had to choose?

On a regular day, what do you usually do at 3 o'clock in the afternoon?

Either work or eat.

What's something new you've just recently learned?

How to cut my bangs so they actually look decent.

Which possession would you not want to inherit from a relative?

Probably a business or something like that. That would just put pressure on me.

What is something you would never dare to do in public? 

Oh, lots of things. I don’t particularly like when people look at me (hello, social anxiety)

Would you/ did you have a hen night/bachelorette party?

I don’t plan on ever getting married, but if I did, maybe something small with close friends.

Has anyone taken you on holiday somewhere? If so, where?

Sure, my mum and dad have. We went to Greece, Turkey and several other countries with seasides.

Have you taken somebody on holiday? If so, where did you taken them?

If taking includes paying for their tickets and all, no.

Who do you see as an iconic star?

Maybe someone like Lady Gaga or so.

Have you ever been to a vineyard?

Yup.

Are there any swans near the area you live in?

Not very close, but yes.

Does anyone in your inner circle struggle with addiction? 

Does nicotine addiction count? If so, loads of people.

Has anyone told you lately that you have a nice smile?

I don’t think anyone’s ever told me that ;-;

How did you spend your last birthday?

First I went shopping for purple dye with mum and then got my hair dyed for the first time. It didn’t really show much on my very dark hair, but I was just happy and excited that I did it. Then in the evening, my parents and uncle and aunt went to a restaurant. It wasn’t really a big birthday, but I usually don’t do much or only celebrate with friends a few days/weeks later.

[castle-dominion]

c1x2 nanny mcdead

I remember this song.

Gal in a machine! Cool!

Police lawyer: Mr. Castle, these waivers are serious business. Perhaps you’d feel more comfortable by referring the matter to your attorney. RC: What, are you kidding? He’d never let me sign these. But, fortunately, it's his job is to get me out of trouble, and not to prevent me from getting into it.

Get to the point ryan. (btw I'm so glad to be watching these in reverse order, if I had gone from s3 finale to this episode I would have gotten whiplash.)

I love the banter w rysposito. JE: Now if that’s not a cautionary tale about poking through someone else’s laundry, I don’t know what is. KR: Dude, there is an etiquette involved. If the clothes were dry, Mrs. Rosenberg had every right to put them in a basket. Now, if you’re gonna tell me she folded them, then it gets a little creepy. JE: I'm sorry, someone starts rooting around my underwear without an invitation? I’m taking that as a serious breach of hygiene. KB: I thought you went commando, Esposito. (How does she know this...?) JE, tilting his head: Well, it's a seasonal thing. (& also less hygienic my dude. For someone worried about ppl poking thru ur undies u ought to be concenrned abt the hygiene of not wearing underwear.)

CASTLE Hard to say. When I'm writing a new character, there’s no telling when inspiration might strike.

BECKETT I thought I was your inspiration.

CASTLE Oh you are, Detective, and in so many ways.

BECKETT Yeah, well, then your inspiration might strike you sooner than you think.

(https://scriptline.livejournal.com/17581.html)

lol "just ny"

RC: Three men huddled around a computer. That better not be porn. And if it is, I want in. Is that a thing? Do men watch porn together? Isn't it kind of gay?

It's new york, there is no such thing as neighborship.

[Castle looks at Beckett. ]

CASTLE (CONT'D) We all know girls like that, don't we?

[Beckett rolls her eyes and sees the three, Esposito, even Captain Montgomery drawn in. And all of them looking at her. ]

Was 8b an actual person or was he just pulling a number out of thin air?

Hey. I cook, you clean. You cook, I clean.

AC: You were the crazy homeless woman. RC: And some might say, still are.

They actually wore Stuff when seeing the body this time!

I forgot Lanie was a fan, apparently he writes death well.

LP: But what I thought you might find really interesting is the fact that she had sex within the hours before her death. KB: Sex? RC: I’ll explain how that works later.

I mean he doesn't want to get an std from her too, but then again you're right about "smart guy" or whatever.

RC: ‘Cause no man likes getting dumped. Am I right? Our egos can’t handle it. *starts telling a story & then stops as soon as he sees beckett's face*

you shouldn't lie bro

Castle: seeming so cute & fatherly Castle the next second: manwhore

I miss being fit enough to play on the playground like that. I went on the monkey bars outside church the other day (yes I'm an adult).

lesbian flag lookin scarf

RC: We could always make it strip poker. Mystery to horror XD XD

Boy looks like he's on drugs. Girl tell them that bro! You made it sound like you were having an affair with sara & then u were offended when they made that assumption???

Ryan reading castle's books <3 beckett got him into it huh.

Wow castle just names a famous lesbian couple. Maybe that's why u think commitment is over. only love is queer.

Beckettt & her red scarf, ryan & his tie looking more like normal (tho tbh I might prefer the college-student look)

RYAN Guess who wasn’t where they said they were the day Sara Manning was killed? BECKETT Who? [Beckett reaches for the paper, but Ryan pulls it out of reach] RYAN Come on, you got to guess. [Ryan continues to dodge] BECKETT Ryan. Ryan. I’m not guessing. RYAN You’re a killjoy, you know that?

Probs smart of her to lie in front of her husband abt divorce there.

Alexis looking so cute like that. Why does he watch two at the same time? The stopping & starting of the elevator does not make sense with the timing.

seventy-seven ain't beyond the realm of possibility! Man acting sus af. So true Castle. Love the finger prints on the mirror. So not smooth Castle. K but where did castle get her number?

Castle's outfits today are not matching his style in future seasons, i dislike it but I like the variety.

If he was home all day, why did they hire a nanny? Was he really that busy or sleepy?

RM playing with a baseball <3

They said the next person on the elevator was the old lady changing her clothes! Inconsistency!

I like how they just go in there, 10/10. RC: Whoa! No! Come on! Come on! I already signed my life away. What more do you want? RC: Hope to die. WAIT NO Why she gotta take off her scarf like that

I love hearing ppl yell or whisper or speak softly.

Back to the laundry room eh? That's more of an end goal than a plan. Oof this scene was great for me. I'm going to have to tag this as mom no look bc hoo babey love me a good thigh bleed. Castle she said not to go in. Girl holster your gun, don't put it on the ground. Love the way her pants are shredded. B'y he's probably manipulating u. When did you see him look at her...? She would probably be using much faster slashes imo, but that depends on the goal. Raises the pinky finger all fancy like. The dryer...???? Where is ryan? Espt was told to get everyone up the stairs but where was ryan? Was he with the family upstairs?

Alexis <3 <3 I love alexis & castle, they are me & my mom in several ways, & sometimes role reversal too.

Nice fencing swords. awww that's such a cute pic!

[ragequilt]

@unintentionalgenius tagged me to do this and I simply cannot resist them SO

1. How many fics do you have on ao3? - the answer is 13 and I find that alarming. I thought it was like... 6.

2. What’s your total ao3 word count? - cannot believe I’m doing math at 9:18 am uhhh 140,834??? How is this number so high??? I truly don’t understand.

3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? - ‘someone who’ll set my heart free’, the hades game sickfic I did not expect to still be getting kudos on to this day, all three of my Spencer Reid/Reader insert fics from 2015, and then ‘to grow a winter garden’, last year’s Jaskier/Reader fic and my longest baby to date!

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? - Generally, if it’s a comment with some depth of its own, I will! Otherwise I feel like the commenter and I will get caught in a loop of just sending love to one another (which is lovely but not Productive.) My fave comments to reply to were the ones on ‘to grow a winter garden’ — the demisexual reader character did a lot for a fair handful of people and that really means SO much to me to have done that at all, so. They get my wordvom.

5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? - HAHAHA I am physically incapable of writing Angst I am so sorry to everyone ??? I can’t even answer this it’s out of my wheelhouse. (that being said I think ‘come out, level up’ is going to have the angstiest scene / arc, but lord we ain’t there yet)

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending? - ohhhhhh boy. what a Question for the me. Probably ‘to grow a winter garden’ but like, it’s complicated-happy (as is the nature with Jaskier, I think, love him.)

7. Do you write crossovers? If so, what’s the craziest one you’ve written? - no, but I am a SUCKER for a fusion fic. See the BNHAH au, the BNHA x Boyfriend Dungeon au, the scraps of YYH fusion fic I write for every fandom I lay my hands on... alas.

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic? - hmmm yes some little baby person decided to send me tumblr askbox hate over my writing for winter garden, instead of closing out the window like an adult, but nothing Big (oh also my ex boyfriend in 2014 hated the RTAH reader insert fic he INSISTED I share with him... yes I’m still mad fuck you man)

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? - okay the technical answer is yes but really I just wanna know about the different kinds of smut. Like, what does this mean? I’m worried about smut genres now what am I missing here

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen? - if I have I don’t know about it!

11. Have you ever had a fic translated? - no way I’m not that big of a deal

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before? - I am effusive sounding board for @unintentionalgenius and I would be miserable without them in my corner as well... and I was beta/and everything else for Wes (Cruel Fate, Kind Destiny), but I don’t think I could actually coauthor something with someone.

13. What’s your all time favorite ship? - oh my god you can’t just ask someone what their favorite ship is. lord let me think... (ten literal minutes later) I can’t possibly pick, like. Whatever @suzukiblu does I’m invested in, same frankly for surveycorpsjean, but like... I can’t simply Pick.

14. What’s a WIP you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? - y’all if I had a better naming scheme I would simply include a screenshot from my scrivener here because the answer is ALL of them. that being said I Do need to finish the Jaskier POV of winter garden.

15. What are your writing strengths? - I think my sentence flow is good, structurally! Everything else is garbage tho sorry.

16. What are your writing weaknesses? - all of it. but lord don’t get me started on character voice I CAN’T DO IT why CAN I NOT DO IT

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in fic? - @unintentionalgenius summed it up well but like — if we aren’t supposed to know what they meant, it gets a one off narrative line. If we are supposed to know what they meant and it’s a whole sentence, we mention that they’re speaking <x language> and write it in the language of the rest of the fic. If it’s a one-off word NBD.

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for? - on ao3? Naruto, I think. In general? Harry Potter, aged 13.

19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to? - honestly even if I haven’t posted it, my scrivener is full of where my id has leaked. Most stuff I either don’t care to write or I just do it. Maybe kacchako, though, I just love them.

20. What’s your favorite fic that you’ve written? - oh boyyyy I feel like I want to say ‘to grow a winter garden’, just bc it wrapped up so well, but there’s so much in the works for ‘come out (level up)’ that I just can’t discount it. Y’all I can’t pick like that. :(

@ofmermaidstories @cat-slippered @bobawithpomegranate y’all I would love to see your answers!!

[deardragonbook]

Writing Reference: Minor age differences in relationships

It is surprisingly rare in the real world how many relationships consist of people the same age. (The older you get, the more rare it is, which makes sense as age is relative and what not). 

For today’s reference I’m focusing on a minor age gap. As usual I’ll be talking from experience so for context sake I’m 23 and my partner is 30. A seven year gap, pretty common especially where I am. I’m saying minor because it’s the average, but averages vary depending on locations and culture so take that in mind. 

With all this said, here’s a list of things that happen due to this age gap: 

1.- Different shows and music growing up, different games too! My first pokemon game was Diamond on the DS, my boyfriend was around to play pokemon red. That’s like, the first one! 

Similarly sometimes my boyfriends and friends start going of about an old show I’ve either never heard of, or binged as an adult because it wasn’t on television when I was a kid. 

Sometimes it’s the opposite and I start going on about a show they never saw because they were too old. Or shows that I watched they will laugh at because, when it was on television it was “little kid’s show”. 

This leads to both me and them discovering a lot of amazing new shows. I view this as a total positive. But if a relationship was not willing to give new things a chance, this could be a barrier, less things to talk about. 

2.- General different childhoods. I’ve had internet since I was like six or seven. My boyfriends grew up without it. If you’re writing fantasy, this can be replaced with any important technological advancement. 

Because of this specific one, I’m more technology dependant, I use an ipad instead of paper for example, where he is better at using dictionaries and maps. 

3.- Language differences. I’m fortunate enough to have grown up with plenty of terms that weren’t in use when my boyfriend was young. Some are technological, while other’s are mental health or sexuality related. Because of this when we’re discussing news I tend to speak in a more “politically correct” kinda way. 

This also affects expressions, I’m going to use an example in Spanish because I can’t think of an English equivalent, “Chachi,” is a word that means cool. There’s a lot of words like that in Spanish (Guay, mola, súper, lindo...). And it’s a term that my generation used a lot in High School, my boyfriend was older, didn’t use it and now it is not a normal part of his vocabulary. He’ll said mostly “mola”. 

It doesn’t really make a difference. It’s just a difference I’ve noticed and thought could be fun to implement in a story. 

4.- Fashions choices is obvious and I don’t think needs an example. 

5.- Playgrounds songs and games. It’s kind of upsetting that I have more overlaps with my little sister than most of my friends. But it’s also kind of funny. 

6.- Schoolling! This is a big one. We learnt different subjects, under different rules. Sometimes these differences are minor, back when he was in school he had to study religion. I studied ethics. But other times the entire educations system is changes so that now a degree is worth less and I am forced to not only consider but consider almost mandatory getting a masters degree. Thank you politicians. 

7.- Politics. We are one the same side of politics but the politics we have experienced and lived through are very different and that’s something you can tell when we talk and discuss stuff. I was too young when my country was in crisis to truly understand what was going on. It was just a word to me. He suffered the consequences. 

This one is probably the one that can be incorporated the best into a fantasy setting. And now that I’m thinking about it, I believe Poison Study did quite a good job at doing it. Not going to spoil anything too big, but basically there’s a big political incident that happens before the books and the main character barely remembers it, while the love interest lived it. I highly recommend you give Poison Study a read! It’s one of my fave books of all time (even though I haven’t read it in years). 

As usual,  check out my book, stories I’ve written plus other social medias: here.

Are you in a relationship with an age gap? What’s your experience? Feel free to add to this post! I sometimes struggle with what differences are due to age and which are due to culture so I left quite a few things out. 

[forever-rogue]

Baby Steps (A Good Man)

A/N: Hello my sunshines! I’m back with another little installment of the AGM ‘verse with our favorite Javi and Dulzura! I love them so much and I’m glad y’all do too! I hope you guys enjoy!  As always, comments and feedback are welcome, and if you’d like to be tagged let me know! Xx

*can be read as a standalone or part of the ‘verse as a whole*

Pairing: Professor! Javi x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 5.8k

Warnings: language, pregnant!reader

A GOOD MAN ‘VERSE MASTERLIST

MASTERLIST

JAVIER MASTERLIST

»»————-　♡　————-««

“Mrs. Peña?” the sound of your name still surprised you, despite the fact that the students had been calling you for several months now. A grin worked its way onto your face as you looked at the young boy who was watching you with wide, eager eyes. Putting your pen down, you motioned for him to continue, “will you come outside and play with us?”

“You want me to hang out with you guys?” you almost laughed at the idea that any kid deemed you worthy of spending time with them, “I thought teachers were lame, Mikey?”

“Some of them, but not all of them! You’re pretty cool,” he smiled and displayed his toothy grin. How were you supposed to say no to him? You nodded and stood up, taking the hand he was holding out to you, “besides we’re playing kickball and we need one more person!!”

“I should have known you were just using me for my exceptional skills,” you pretended to be hurt as he pulled out of the building and into the playground, where the sun was shining brightly. 

Normally, you’d have turned him down, opting to get some work done during the lunch period, but decided you might as well indulge him and yourself. You really enjoyed the kids you had this year, and it was a gorgeous early spring day. 

»»————-　♡　————-««

Turns out, kickball with a bunch of seven and eight year olds was not as simple as it seemed. They seemed to come up with all sorts of nonsense rules, and on top of it all, they happened to be extremely competitive. And yet...you were thoroughly enjoying yourself - and glad you had opted to wear jeans today instead of a skirt or dress. Javi had been particularly fond of the tight, high-waisted jeans that hugged you in all the right places, getting very handsy before you both had to leave for work. Typical Javier; not that you minded of course. 

“Come on, give us a good one, Mrs. P!” Mikey yelled at the top of his small lungs as you proceeded to kick the ball that was rolled at you. You offered up a firm kick, but not one you would have used if you’d been playing with only adults. Taking unfair advantage was something you definitely didn’t want to do.

As soon as your foot made contact with the red rubber ball, you watched it whistle through the air before running to the first base. But...it was over before it started as you ran and then immediately proceeded to trip over your slightly untied shoelaces. You made contact with the hard earth before you knew and rolled your ankle in the process. 

You landed with a mixture of an annoyed sigh and a loud oof as you chided yourself. You should have made sure they were properly tied before doing anything. The kids clambered around you, faces anxious as they tried to make sure you were okay. Physically you were sure you’d be just fine, but mentally your pride was wounded. Oh, to make a fool of yourself in front of a bunch of children. 

“I’m alright,” you promised as you slowly rose to your feet; an instant tinge of pain shot through your ankle and leg as you almost lost your balance again. Maybe you were hurt… “it’s alright - you guys go back to playing and I’m going to go back to the classroom and sit for a moment. I might have twisted my ankle.”

They nodded, but gave you wary looks as you hobbled back inside the building. You should have remained the umpire and refused to play; you were obviously not coordinated enough for any of this. Slumping back in your chair, you rolled up your pant leg and hissed at the sight of the already swollen ankle. Shit.

“You’d better get that checked out,” Anna, one of the teachers from across the hall looked at you with a pained expression, “looks painful.”

“Nothing some rest and elevation won’t fix,” you insisted as you slumped against the back of the chair, “I’m too old for this! When did I become an adult?"

“Hey, at least they think you’re cool,” she huffed playfully, “they never ask me to play! But seriously, that looks pretty bad. And it happened at work, you know how they get about stuff like that.”

“Fineeee,” you groaned, “I’ll go to the school nurse.”

“I would recommend an actual urgent care or ER visit,” she raised an eyebrow, “besides, you know how Javi gets - he'll flay us all if he thought we weren’t looking out for you.”

“He’s...something else.”

“He’s amazing,” she reminded as you nodded in agreement. For how much of a worrywart he could be, you knew it was all out of love, “now go and get it checked out. I’ll handle getting the sub in and telling everyone. You have enough to worry about. Can you make it okay, or will you need a ride? Should I call Javi?”

“I can drive myself,” you promised, thankful it happened to your left foot and not the right, “I’m not going to bother my darling, overprotective husband just yet. Not until I can confirm that nothing is actually wrong. I don’t want him to stress over nothing, and I’m sure by the time he gets home tonight he’ll just be laughing at me and my clumsiness!”

“Alright,” Anna grabbed your purse and handed it to you, as you managed to slink out of the chair, “go get checked out and feel better. If you need anything at all, just call me.”

“Thanks for all of your help,” you hobbled towards the door, trying to keep as much weight off of your foot as possible, as Anna grimaced at you, “I swear it’s not that bad - worse than it looks.”

“Sure, sure,” she disagreed politely, “now quit stalling and go get help!”

»»————-　♡　————-««

The white walls and bright lights of the exam room were enough to rattle your nerves, even if just ever so lightly. You sat on the examination bed and tried to keep yourself calm as you waited for the nurse to come back and begin examining you. Nothing but the distant sounds of people outside and the tick-tock of the aging clock met your ears. You almost wish you’d called Javier just to have some company. Shit.

“Mrs. Peña?” a kind looking woman, maybe around Javier’s age poked her head in as you nodded, “sorry for the wait, we’re pretty busy right now. You’re here for a rolled ankle?”

“Yeah,” you answered as you relaxed at her comforting presence as she came in and sat on her rolling stool, eyes immediately dropping your swollen and irritated ankle, “I was playing with my kids outside - kickball - and then tripped over my own damn feet and ta da!”

“Were you at home when this happened? Playing with your kids?”

“Oh no, I’m a teacher,” you quickly explained, a warm flush rising up your cheeks at the thought of children, “it was on their lunch break at school. I-I don’t have any children of my own.”

You weren’t sure why you felt the need to offer up a clarifying statement.

“I see,” she made a few notes before turning back to you, “it looks pretty bad, to be quite frank. I’m going to assume it wasn’t a break, a sprain rather, from how you’re managing, but we’ll need to do some x-rays to confirm. We’ll do your blood work as well just to make sure everything is in order. Before we do x-rays or anything - are you pregnant?”

“No,” you admitted, looking at your feet as you tried not to sigh. It had been on your mind recently, and you weren’t sure quite what to make of your own feelings on the matter. While you hadn't been actively trying, you couldn't help but wonder if it would ever happen.

“Any chance you could be?” 

“Umm,” you twiddled your thumbs as you shrugged your shoulders, “I-I suppose. I’m not on birth control and my husband and I don’t use protection...we’ve been trying but not trying if that makes sense? But my cycle’s been regular so I highly doubt it.”

“Okay,” the scratching of her pen on paper was almost maddening as she was making notes and you just sat there. You could curse yourself for babbling on to her, but you couldn’t really help it. Besides, it’d be better for them to know all the details if they were going to x-ray and poke and prod you, “very good. Let me just go get everything and we’ll get started and a better look at everything. We’ll have you set and on your way in no time.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

“Here you go,” you scratched Stevie’s ears as you offered him a treat, a scrap of carrot from the vegetables you were chopping up for dinner, “what do you think, buddy? Should we tell him tonight?”

“Should we tell who and what tonight?” Javi’s voice startled you so much that you almost dropped your knife. You hadn’t even heard him come in, ever the sneaky DEA agent as he walked into the kitchen. A smile was on his face as he came over to you and pressed a soft kiss to your lips, “hi baby.”

“J-Javi,” you couldn’t help but melt into his touch, despite his surprise arrival, “you’re home!”

“Oh very observant of you, Dulzura,” he teased as he pulled back and started to undo his tie. It was only then that he noticed you weren’t wearing what you had earlier in the day; you were in one of his sweaters and a pair of joggers and… “what the hell happened to your ankle?!”

There it was  - Javier switching into overdrive. You put everything down on the counter and turned to him, putting on your most innocent and sheepish expression. His large, warm hands found your face as he looked you over to make sure you were okay. 

“It’s nothing, Javi,” you promised him, “I swear it. It’s just a bad sprain, but I went and had it looked at and they wrapped it and gave me pain killers. It’s umm...a stupid little story actually…”

“What happened?” he bent down and reached out to tentatively and delicately cheek the binding to make sure the nurse had properly tended to your sprain. He made a small sound of disgruntled satisfaction before standing up and waiting for a proper explanation, “why didn’t you call me?”

“I didn’t want to worry you, Javier,” you promised as he crossed his arms over his broad but acquiesced with a nod, “you’re so busy, and honestly, it wasn’t a big deal at all. Besides, Anna was ready to call you immediately, but I told her not to worry. All that happened was that I was outside with the kids and we were playing kickball and I tried over my laces, fell, and twisted my ankle. It hurts, but no fracture or anything.”

Javier’s lips twitched as he tried not to laugh, his shoulders shaking with effort as he just studied you, “are you....are you serious, Dulzura?”

“Don’t laugh at me!” you pouted as he started laughing at your dismal nod when you confirmed that that was what actually happened, “they thought I was cool and how was I supposed to say no to them!? I’m the cool teacher to them!”

“And look what that got you,” he snickered as you sighed heavily, “I’m sorry - I’m sorry. As long as you’re okay, that’s what matters. Whatever you need, just tell me the word and I’ll make sure you have it. I’ll take good care of you, Dulzura.”

“I know you will...you always do,” your heart raced as you tried to decide whether or not to tell him the rest of your revelations. But then he looked at you with those eyes, those soft brown, gentle eyes, and your heart melted. He gently pulled you into his arms as he kissed you again, chasing after your soft, sweet lips with his own, seemingly never able to get enough of you, “Javier, I love you.”

“I love you too,” you felt him smile against your lips, “what’s brought on your sudden declaration of love, mi alma?”

“I...I’m pregnant,” you blurted it out without even really thinking about it. Javier pulled back as a surprised expression crossed his features. He looked at you, seemingly in a state of shock, before opening and closing his mouth a few times, “Javi?”

“You’re pregnant?” he repeated as you nodded. It took about a moment for everything to finally come full circle as he finally realized what you had said. Immediately, an overwhelming wave of emotion came over you as you felt the back of your eyes start to sting with tears. He grabbed your face and slowly crashed his lips back onto yours and kissed deeply and slowly, “holy shit.”

“I know,” you beamed at him, “they asked before they did x-rays and blood work and then well...they discovered I was pregnant. I had no clue and then they told me and yeah - holy shit."

“That’s amazing,” he said softly, “pregnant....”

“I know,” you breathed him in and ran a hand through his dark curls, “I’m not far along, only like six weeks, so it’s still very early, but yes. We’re finally having a baby, Javier!

“I don’t know what I ever did to deserve you,” he whispered as he wrapped his arms around and held you in a tight embrace, “I love you so much.”

“You deserve this - everything. You are such a good man, Javier, and I am so honored to call you my husband, and the father of my child,” he almost melted under your praise as you traced along his features before resting your hand on his cheek, “I love you, Javi. I am so excited for this.”

“Me too,” he agreed, “this is everything - you are everything.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

3 months pregnant

“Dulzura?” Javier yawned as he wiped the sleep from his eyes as he got up and found you in the kitchen, peering into the fridge. You were in the mood for...something. You just weren’t sure what that something was. Everything sounded good but nothing seemed to satiate that craving you had deep within, “what are you doing up?”

“I couldn’t sleep,” you admitted, hoping you hadn’t woken him up by accident, “and I got hungry. I’m sorry if I woke you, my love. Go back to bed, Javier.”

“It’s fine,” he insisted as he shuffled into the kitchen and slowly pried you away from the fridge, “sit down, and let me make you something to eat. What sounds good?”

“Javier,” you did as he asked, padding over to the other side of the counter and taking a seat at the bar. You rested your head on your hands as he stifled a yawn, "honey, go back to bed. You're exhausted and you've got back to back classes tomorrow."

"They start in the late morning," he insisted, with a sleepy nod as you just laughed at him. He was such a stubborn man sometimes it drove you crazy - but you knew it came from a place of love and concern, "don't sleep well without you anyways. 's better when you're there."

"Oh, my sweet husband," he reached into the fridge and pulled out some cheese, butter, and your favorite pickled jalapeños. You watched in curiosity as he went to the bread box and grabbed the fresh loaf of bread you'd purchased earlier at the store, "grilled cheese?"

"Grilled cheese with jalapeños," he corrected, a lazy smile tugged up the corners of his mouth. You made a small sound of musing as you realized it didn't sound too bad at all, "and tomato soup, naturally. How does that sound?"

"Sounds delicious," you grinned eagerly as you leaned in to watch him work. You made a small sound of surprise as your stomach rumbled loudly. Apparently you were hungrier than you had thought, "apparently, my stomach and I agree. I think its your daughter that agrees."

At the mention of your baby, Javier paused and smiled, his eyes flitting to your barely visible bump. Some days he still couldn't believe that you were having a baby. You were his wife. What a wild world it was indeed; years ago he'd never dreamed he would have all of this. The Javier that once existed and refused to believe that there was any light in the world could never have pictured any of this. 

But here you were. Continually proving him wrong. And he loved it all.

"Wait - how do you know we're having a girl?" he asked, suddenly wide awake as he raised an eyebrow at you, "I thought we still need to wait another month or so."

"We do," you grinned at him, "but I just know. I'm sure of it!"

"Well, you do have a fifty-fifty chance of being right…"

"I have a hundred percent chance of being right," you insisted as you reached over the counter and grabbed the jar of pickled jalapeños and fished a few out, and popped them into your mouth, "don't argue with your pregnant wife, Javier Peña. You of all people should know not to cross someone so dangerous."

He snorted with laughter, suddenly feeling much more awake as he sliced up cheese and turned on the stove, "and if we end up having a son?"

"Then we keep having more until we have a daughter and I am proven right," you plastered on a sweet smile, knowing it would wind him up. You'd never really discussed how many children you wanted or planned on having. It was just a sort of...whatever happens happens type thing. But, if you were being honest, you'd probably have given Javier as many children as he wanted. Your husband fell silent as he watched you for a moment before taking the jar away from, "nothing to add? Silence isn't like you, my love."

"We can have as many as you'd like," he promised, "you're the one doing all the hard work. If you're done after one, then it's fine for me. You already amaze me every day."

"Don't make me cry, Javier," your whole body soaked in the warmth and love from his simple words, "its getting really easy at this point, and you're taking advantage!"

"Sorry," he shot you a wink before leaning over and pressing a soft kiss to your lips, "back to business."

"Hmm," you mused quietly, "I thought kissing me was business."

"I thought you were hungry?"

"Fine," you playfully huffed as he carried on cooking, "Javi?"

"Dulzura?"

"I love you," you beamed at him, the little smile that worked its way onto his face take your breath away - as it always had. 

"I love you."

»»————-　♡　————-««

6 months pregnant

A huff escaped your lips as you tried to reach for the socks and underwear that had fallen out of the laundry basket. It was no easy feat when you couldn’t see your own feet anymore. But you were determined to get everything up and off the floor as you walked back towards your bedroom to put away the clean clothes. And you weren’t about to give up and ask for help - not yet anyway.

Instead, you opted to awkwardly lower yourself to the floor in order to blindly grab for the discarded items. But it was no use...this was almost harder. 

“You alright, Dulzura?” Javier came in and found you struggling, cleaning his dirty hands off on a rag. He’d been working outside, getting the garden spruced up as the summer slowly came to an end, “can’t reach?”

“I can,” you stuck your tongue out at him as he huffed with laughter, but motioned for you to go on. Wanting to prove that you were right, and weren’t completely helpless after all. It hadn’t been easy having to give up a lot of the things you used to be able to do with ease as you progressed in your pregnancy. The fact that none of your pants would fit over your belly anymore had been a point of horror for you - it meant you were truly and actually pregnant, you were actually having a baby. You’d always known, but that had been what made it all extremely real. Every day you got closer and closer to your due date, it all became a little more real. Exciting - but terrifying. 

Not being able to see your feet had been another blow. You could hardly get proper shoes on anymore, opting for easy slide ons, which were great for the warmth of summer and didn’t matter since you were on summer break along with your kids. It was almost as though Javier could sense your frustration, and he’d often silently help you with getting your shoes on in the morning. He never said a word, knowing he didn’t have to. He always told you he loved you in so many ways, often without saying it. 

You tried to again, dangling your hand along on the floor as you tried again. After watching you struggle for a moment, Javier came over and grabbed everything in one foul swoop before taking your hand in his and helping you upright. 

“Hey,” you pouted at him as he put the items back into your basket, “I almost had it!”

“I know,” he kissed the tip of your nose, “but I wanted to help. Why can I not help my gorgeous wife?”

“Your very pregnant and easily frustrated wife?” you teased as you started to walk towards the bedroom. He followed after you, swatting at your bum as you squealed in delight, “Javier!”

“Come on, mi alma,” he grinned, “let me help put everything away.”

“If I let you help, you’re just going to take me to bed and then I’ll have to wash the sheets again!”

“I’ve never heard a single complaint from you before,” as you set the basket on the dresser, he came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist before settling a hand on your belly and gently rubbing it a few times. He pressed a few kisses to the side of your neck as you tilted your head to give him easier access, “there we go, Dulzura. Just like you like it.”

“You’re the worst,” you teased as you turned your head to kiss him, “you’re lucky I love you. And I’m seemingly always in the mood right now - they really weren’t kidding about pregnancy making you more horny. Although, I’ve never heard a single complaint from you before.”

“And you never will,” he promised, his low in your ear as you tried not to completely let your mind wander too far away, “do you have any plans for this afternoon, Dulzura?”

“N-no,” you  managed to choke out as one of his hands skimmed along the waistband of your leggings. You knew exactly where this was going, and you were loath to stop him, especially as he slowly kept kissing you.

“Good,” he rasped, “because I have plans for you. Been thinking about you all day, especially in these tight leggings. You knew exactly what you were doing, didn’t you honey?”

“Uh huh,” you agreed as his warm hand slipped inside and a shiver ran up your spine, “Javier. Please.”

“Don’t worry, mi alma,” he captured your gasp in a sweet kiss, “I’ll take good care of you.”

The laundry could definitely wait.

»»————-　♡　————-««

9 months pregnant 

It was an early, chilling morning as you sipped on some tea as you sat out in the garden. It was probably too cold to be sitting outside, but you were handled up in blankets and didn't care. 

Christmas was a few weeks away and you enjoyed peeking into the neighbor's yards to see what they all had going on for decorations.

"Are you sure you don't want to come inside?" Javier poked his head out from the sliding screen door, his brow furrowed in concentration, "its freezing! And I have breakfast!"

"I've got blankets and a baby keeping me warm," you reminded him, pointing at your large belly. You were due in a couple of weeks; how time had flown. He jokingly frowned at you, sticking out his tongue. Playfully rolling your eyes, you clambered to your feet and waddled over to him, "fine, hold on you big baby. This is because I want breakfast."

Javier was on his winter break from teaching and you were on maternity leave now and you definitely didn't mind having him around all the time. If you could have always had it this way, you definitely wouldn't have minded.

"I'm just looking out for you," he insisted with a pout as you pressed a kiss to his lips, "I talked to Papà. He's really excited to come in a few weeks - more like excited to meet his grandbaby."

"I'm not complaining at all," you insisted, knowing there would be many sleepless nights and chaotic days ahead of you, "we'll need all the help we can get. Hell, maybe we can convince Steve and Connie to come and visit too…"

"I'm sure we'll have all the help in the world between our families and friends, Dulzura," he promised as he took your hand and pulled you into the warm kitchen, putting a plate of breakfast for you on the counter, "I'm sure we'll get sick of having so many people around."

"I guess we'll just have to wait and see," you took a bite and smiled as Stevie laid by your feet. The whole house was warm and cozy, perfectly decorated for Christmas, with a huge tree and already lots of presents. Javier had really outdone himself this year, seemingly more in the Christmas spirit than you. Honestly, you were feeling a little bit out of it - being so pregnant would do that to you. 

You watched your husband for a few moments, admiring his profile and lazy smile. Gods, you were still so in love with him. He felt you watching him closely, and turned to you, cooking a dark brow, "what's on your mind, mi alma?"

"Nothing much," you shrugged lightly, feeling a flush of warmth was over you at him catching you, "just thinking about how I love you, and how I'm glad you're here with me, that you knocked me up, and yeah. Are you…are you nervous Javi?"

"About the baby?"

"No, about the Astros' odds next season," you snorted as he groaned at your joke, "of course the baby. I'm just...so nervous. Like I feel ready to meet her, but I'm so scared that I'll fuck it up somehow."

"You still think its a girl?"

"Positive," you grinned at him - you'd decided not to find out the sex ahead of time, leaving it a surprise for both of you. You were still convinced it was a girl, Javier was undecided, "we'll find out soon enough!"

"Either way," he brought his plate and sat down next to you, "everything will be alright. You're going to be an amazing mother, Dulzura. You are everything."

"I love you, Javier," you beamed as he gently put a hand on your belly, "I know it'll be alright, but holy shit - I'm so nervous. Its getting so real lately. We're going to be parents."

"Parents," he repeated, "fuck."

"Who would have thought-" you were quickly cut off when you felt the baby flutter round. A small sound of surprise left your lips as you grabbed Javier's hand and placed it on your belly, "she's telling you not to curse."

He was silent for a moment as a smile spread on his features; despite having felt this many times by now, it still continued to surprise him. He couldn't even imagine how it felt for you, "this is...everything."

"I realized I didn't know what to get you for Christmas so I got you a baby instead," you don't know why it came to mind, but as soon as the words left your lips you brought into a fit of laughter - Javier joined in, a brilliant sound that you adored above all.

"Best Christmas present ever," he whispered before leaning in and giving you a gentle kiss - sweet from the syrup and pancakes he had just eaten, "I mean it. I love you both more than you will ever know."

"We love you too," you grinned as he stroked your belly, "I'm glad your class was the only one available and I took it. I'm glad you were a grumpy professor that let me into his office - I was able to work my magic and look where that got us."

He threw his back with laughter, his dark curls shining brilliantly in the light as his eyes crinkled in the corners. You'd never been more glad for subjecting yourself to his class.

"Me too," he whispered as he put a hand on your cheek, "you always were a stubborn thing."

"Some things never change," you stuck your tongue out at him, "I trust your daughter will be the same!"

»»————-　♡　————-««

You were humming to yourself as you shuffled around the kitchen and tried to put together a mid afternoon snack when you felt an odd sensation in your lower belly. It caused you to drop the knife on the counter as you held onto the marble and gritted your teeth. Stevie was at your feet in an instant, looking at you with concern.

"Its okay, buddy," you reassured him as the pain passed. Surely it couldn't have been anything too bad...probably just an end of pregnancy pain. Sighing at your nonsense worry, you reached for the knife again but before you reached it, the pain was back, "never mind, shit shit shit."

Trying to keep yourself calm, you leaned against the counter and tried to even your breathing. Contractions. Of course. You were due in a week and you still hadn't been expecting it.

"Javier?" he was down the hall in the second bedroom that had been converted into the nursery, putting away the final touches of clothing. Before he could respond, you felt an odd sensation followed by liquid running down your legs, "Javier!"

"What's wrong, Dulzura?" he rushed down the hall and back into the kitchen, worry etched onto his features as you stood there in shock and clutched at your belly, "honey-"

"My water broke," you said meekly as you pointed to your wet pants, "and I've had a few contractions - I think the baby's coming."

"Okay," he immediately kicked into gear as he remained cool and calm, despite wanting to panic and worry along with you, "its okay. I'm going to get the hospital bag, we'll get you in the car, Stevie to the neighbor, and then we'll go and have a baby."

"You make it seem so simple," you huffed lightly as you tried to channel his inner calm demeanor, "we'll be okay, right? I-I'm scared…"

"I know, honey," he promised as he kissed the side of your head, "you've done so amazing already, it will all be okay. I'm right here, okay? I'm just going to grab your bag and the dog and we'll go. Ten minutes and we'll be on the way."

"Okay," you agreed as he practically ran down the hall to get your packed bag, "we're going to have a baby, Javi."

"Indeed we are," he agreed with a small smile as he reached for his wallet and keys and stuff for the neighbor to watch Stevie for a few days, "we're having our baby."

Holy shit.

»»————-　♡　————-««

“You’re doing amazing, sweetheart,” Javier praised you as you squeezed his hand after another push. You groaned and gritted your teeth as you glared at him; this was absolute hell, “the baby’s almost there.”

“Shut up, Javier,” you hissed as you got ready for another push, “I am never letting you touch me again! You did this to me.”

“Hey - it was a team effort,” he reminded you in a vain attempt at a joke. Your death glare and the squeezing of his hand said it all, “sorry, Dulzura. I love you.”

“I love you too,” you said as you took a deep breath, “but right now, I’m blaming this on you.”

“Fair enough,” he said as you pushed again. He was sure his hand was going to break.

»»————-　♡　————-««

It wasn’t much longer before you were laying back and holding the smallest bundle you could ever imagine in your arms. You were somewhere between crying tears of joy and exhaustion, as you stared at your newborn daughter in awe. Javier was sitting next to you, looking down at her, his own eyes glossy as he gently touched her cheek. She had the darkest eyes and a shock of dark hair, already taking after her father. She had come into the world squealing and crying but had fallen asleep almost as soon as Javier held her. 

“I told you we were having a girl,” you teased him softly, “I was right. Look at her, Javier. That’s our daughter. We made her.”

“You did all the hard work, mi alma,” he whispered as he pressed a kiss to the side of your head, “she’s beautiful.”

“Lucia Luna Peña,” you grinned at your husband, “it’s perfect. I love you both more than you could ever know. Javier...you really are everything to me - the best friend, best husband, and now the best father. She’s going to love the hell out of you, just like I do.”

He remained silent for a moment as he looked at the sleeping baby before looking back at you. His whole world was in his arms, and the thought of that alone was enough to overwhelm him with emotion. He’d never thought he wanted this - a “boring” job, a home, a wife, and a baby. 

But here he was. And he had never felt happier, never felt more full of love and life. This was everything. 

“I love you so much, Dulzura - you and Lucia,” he promised as he rested his head on top of yours, “you have given me everything, more than you know. Te quiero con todo.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

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[wenwenbittercake]

Inuin and Y/N

(This is a normal AU where Inuin and KoKo are your best friend and Inuin have a crush on you but you like KoKo-nut more. He’s stuck between wanting to break their friendship and want to kiss you senselessly.)

Warnings:yandere contents, swearing, spicy🌶🌶

(Sorry for late posts, I just got really depressed after my recent submission got 4 likes 😫😫😫Sorry if I haven’t written your submission because it’s probably not finished yet or It’s too uncomfortable for me to write. With that, enjoy.)

“Hey Inui!”

Someone hug Inui from behind making him snap out of his daydream. He turn around from his chair to see a familiar face that create a tint of blush on his cheeks.

“Y/N why are you here this early?”

“Early? Look around you dumb ass.” KoKo said as he comes into the class.

Inui lazily look around him to see the class empty. He must had fallen asleep.

“Oh.”

“Wht do you mean “Oh”? Pack your stuff or we’re leaving you behind!”

“KoKo don’t be so harsh on Inui, he’s just tired from his part time job.”

KoKo got a frond on his face when you defend Inui. Inui on the other hand blushes while putting his things in his back.

“Oh yea? For a person who sleeps around in class of cause he’s going to work in that shabby motorcycle shop.”

“Hey.” You warn Koko. Both of you look each other and inspect Inui’s face.

Inui is used to the constant slanders and being beaten around by Koko, It’s not that he’s a bully, he’s just like that. He would apologies later about it but what he said is true. Koko is a smart kid who get all A’s in his class. He’s the brightest kid in their little friend group. So, the brightest flower catches the most beautiful butterflies, and that butterfly is you.

For the first time in his life, he craves for someone and that someone is you. He misses you 24/7. Always wanting to see your face, hear your voice and feel your touch. He even goes as far as going to your house one night after work to see you. But unfortunately, you were asleep. It doesn’t matter much when he climbs to your window to see you sleeping so soundly.

You can call him a psychopath but he’s just making sure your save by hacking into your phone and looking through all your social info and private messages.

You can call him a creep for following you around at night making sure no wolfs can catch a cute bunny like you.

You can call him a sociopath for lying to you as he only sees you as a friend when he craves to feel more of you then your hands.

He doesn’t care what you call him, he’s doing all this to keep you save form the dangerous people out there or to feed his desires.

Now you both are in a hotpot restaurant. Koko apologies to Inui by treating hotpot and BBK to both of you. All of you talk about school life, how hard to weekly test was or gossip about that one kid in class that reminds the teacher about the homework. Noting goes into Inui mind as he’s too focus on you and Koko interactions.

Koko is talking about these facts he knows of, and you listen to him with wide eyes. Then he whispers something in your ears making you blush. Inui clench his jaw seeing that. Koko looks proud that he’s getting all your attention to himself. On the other hand, Inui watch Koko and you with a sad look with a dash of jealousy.

“Oh, look who’s jealous.” All the spotlight is now on Inui making him slightly uncomfortable.

“Why are you all looking at me?”

“Oh, we all know you’re the jelly one here.” He teases as you switch your seat near him.

You close your space between you and Inui, your face so close to his, a slight movement from him can make him go for a kiss. Your eyes half lid and tease him as you trace his collar with your slender fingers. Not touching him but so close to. Inui’s breath become heavy, his head even feel cloudy to the situation, both of you look at each other’s eyes with lust.

“Tell me baby.”

He just wants to push his head forward and give a deep long kiss, but Koko’s clap snaps him out of hid fantasies. You giggle and hop off Inui’s lap and go sit beside Koko.

“Koko did you see that?”

“Yes, you did a great job.” He said as he places his arms around your shoulder.

“What’s going on?” Inui looks confused.

“It’s a prank! Got you!” You shout and laugh with Koko. In that moment Inui felt both embarrassed and mad. It’s definitely not your idea. Your inexperience ass would never. It gotta be Koko’s.

“You guys are dicks.” He said as he stood up a leave.

“Inui wait- “you were about to stop him when Koko pull you back in his arms.

“Leave it, he’s fine. He’s just a little embarrassed.”

That Bitch

That night Inui can’t get you out of his head. He can’t when you look so cute and sexy when you did that half lid move. The way you touch him felt so different from how you use to touch him. So soft and teasing. He tries to memorize it, but it slowly fades away. He can only remember how hot and lustful it felt. How he got hard just by your voice. He needs it again.

“Inui, I’m going to ask Y/N out.” Inui nearly chokes on his lunch.

“Wait what?”

“Yea I’m gonna ask her out.”

“Wait wait where? When.”

“Tonight, at the playground we use to go at.”

“Wait isn’t it too fast?”

“Wdym it’s fast? Look I realize my feelings for her are real and I just need to let it out. I just want you to know that.”

Inui looks shock as Koko left from the cafeteria. No way this is happening. His best friend with the girl he loves the most. He tries to think positive. Maybe it’s the best for you. Koko is perfect for you, he’s smart, he’s rich, he can fulfil everything you need. He can make you happy. But seeing you with Koko make his heart aches. The thought of how Koko can make you feel complete tortures him every bit.

The rain was pouring like there no tmr. He looks at his clock, 7:30 pm. Koko is going to ask you out at 8 and he’s here sweeping floors. What a fucking loser, he thought of himself. He looks through his phone to pass time and see your message.

Koko told me to wait at the playground we use to play. Idk why but I feel like something serious is going to happen.

I want you to come by that’s all.

It’s fine if you’re busy.

What is he doing here? Y/N needs him. He’s supposed to do whatever you desire right?

He rash out of the shop, even Drakun was shocks at the speed. He run desperately like a predator meets his prey. This is his only chance to feel honest with you. After Koko ask you out, it would be too late. You will be Koko’s. The thought of it filled him with agony.

He stops in front of the playground; his eyes scatter the play. There he finds you standing there with a yellow umbrella. He knows it your cause he bought that umbrella for you.

“Inui? What are you doing here? Omg your soaked.”

He stands in front of you, his eyes fill with desires. He feels like burning. The only thing that’s keeping him cool is the rain. He felt happy when he realizes Koko is nowhere to be found.

“Inui?” You look up to him with wide eyes.

Fuck Y/N

He pulls you in his arm and kiss you. It feels so longing. You yelp in shock giving him a chance to enter his tongue in your mouth. You panic causing your umbrella to drop. He let out all his needs, his urges with action. His fantasies are becoming a reality. Your taste, your touch, the way you whimper in his hold. It all feels so good, he’s starting to feel feverish.

The rain pours all over both of you. It feels like you’re in a movie. Actually, you’re not sure if you like Koko or Inui. You’ve spent so much time with them yet, you still don’t have a sure answer when it comes to both of them but now. You’re sure now.

You both parted from your feverish kiss, you look at each other eyes. You look at him with wide eyes, your lips swollen. You hold on Inui’s shirt, trying to not fall from your shaking knees.

“I’m sorry Y/N. I just can’t take it anymore.”

“I-it’s actually fine. I kinda like you so..’’

“Wait are you serious?”

“Of cause I’m serious! What you don’t wanna take responsibility now?”

“No, it’s just- “

“Shut up and just hug me.” You hide your embarrassed face in Inui’s chest. He chuckles at your action and wrap his arms around you tightly.

“Let’s go home.”

From a far, a man with a chain earring stood silently behind trees as both love birds left. He grips his umbrella tight as he glares at Inui. The envy he’s feeling is strong enough to kill a man.

“That Bitch”

(Thank you for reading my fanfic. Also sorry if I made a mistake or it's not that good. This is my first time writing a yandere character so forgive me. 🙏🙏🙏also i'm sorry I don't put the artist name for the headline. I don't know the artist who draw it that's why. If you know, ur more than welcome to tell me. Thank you ❤🌹🙏🙏)

[teacup-set]

Paperhearted

Summary: ‘Tch. Who says ‘I love you’ to someone they just met?’ he thinks, frowning all the way home. ‘Annoying.’

But his heart feels caught in quicksand, slowly sinking to his stomach.

She never did tell him her name.

[ModernAU, for @disquieted]

Read on: FFN, AO3

x

A chill cuts through the autumn air as Sasuke waits for his brother to pick him up. The kindergarten playground is quiet except for the creaking of the swing that he sits on as he waits. With every passing second his mood grows sour. All the other kids had already been picked up long ago, he is the only one still waiting. He wonders if Itachi nii-san will make up for his delay by playing with him when they get home, and suddenly perks up at the thought. In his mind he devises how he will pout and look disappointed to really drive home the guilt, when the silence of the playground is interrupted by a scream.

Startled, Sasuke whips in the direction of the sound. It came from the adjacent woods, and nii-san had told him strictly to never leave the kindergarten campus. Besides, he is only a kid. He will just get in the way, he reasons.

‘Then why am I doing it?’ he wonders as his legs move on their own accord, tugging him across some invisible string to where the sound came from.

As he draws closer, he regains enough control to slow down, and quietly pulls to a stop behind a tree. In the clearing ahead he sees two boys snickering, peering down at something obscured from his view, and he vaguely registers seeing them before around town. They look a year or two older and seem to wear the same school uniform Itachi wears, though mother would throw a fit if she ever saw Itachi’s clothes so rumpled and untucked.

“Boo-hoo, look at little strawberry shortcake crying.” one of them mocks.

“Ooh! Leave the cat alone!” the other squeals in a high-pitched imitation, “Well how do you like being in its place then?” he finishes in his normal voice, aiming a kick forwards.

He sees her then, as she falls sideways from the blow, into his line of sight.

Pink hair (pink! ) falling out from her red ribbon, teeth biting her lower lip to keep from crying out, and the brightest green eyes he has ever seen brimming with tears and the determination to not let them fall.

The first boy, egged on, aims another kick at her stomach. She closes her eyes shut tightly and gasps when his foot connects. Sasuke feels his heart clench. He wants to help, but there are two of them and only one of him. They’re older too. It would be stupid to engage.

‘I’m not stupid.’ he thinks. ‘I’m not stupid!’ he repeats.

Her eyes open and they are glassy and unfocussed. He watches as her gaze travels dimly across the landscape around her till she spots him and stills. All of a sudden the clarity of the world around him shifts, and Sasuke feels like he is waking into a dream. She holds his gaze, and then a single tear falls down her swollen cheek.

“I’m not stupid!” his mind echoes again. Only this time he isn’t thinking it, he is screaming it from his lungs as he charges across the clearing into one of the bullies.

By the time he has regained his sense of time and place, his fist has already connected with the face of the boy who kicked her the second time. Sasuke isn’t sure where he mustered the strength because the boy flies back a full two feet, planting face first into the ground. Around him, the boy’s accomplice and the girl both stare at the scene that just unfolded in shocked silence. Then the stillness of the moment is shattered as both the bullies scream, and scramble to get away.

Sasuke is heaving from the rush of what has just transpired, and watches as the boys make their escape. Behind him, the girl lifts herself off the ground and sits up. He turns to face her.

She is looking at him quizzically and he can’t say he blames her, he himself is unsure of what possessed him. But looking at her, eyes and cheeks swollen, hair and clothes in disarray, a tear-trail cutting across a muddied cheek, he can’t bring himself to regret it.

“Your hand...it’s bleeding.” she says, softly.

Sasuke frowns and looks down, and indeed she is right. There is a gash across his knuckles, angry and red.

Slowly she gets up, and limps towards him. Reaching out, she gingerly takes his bleeding hand into her own and looks at it thoughtfully. Then she retreats one hand to pull out the ribbon in her hair, and ties it around his knuckles. She releases his hand and immediately he feels bereft, though he isn’t sure why.

“Um, thank you.” she says shyly.

Before he can open his mouth to respond, they hear commotion in the distance.

They turn towards the sound to see the two boys from earlier staggering back towards them...with three other friends in tow. Sasuke doesn’t know where his strength came from earlier, but he is doubtful he can summon it again. Especially against five older opponents.

They look at each other. There is an understanding.

And then they run.

They race through the woods with reckless abandon, hair flying in the wind. Beside him he hears her laugh as they are running, and he has half a mind to ask her what exactly she finds funny about this, but he is laughing along too. There is something so freeing and young about the whole situation. They run without thinking, giggling every time they glance back at the group giving chase. Every few moments they are drenched in sunlight breaking past the canopy, before plunging into the shade again. Despite her beating, the girl manages to keep up pace, never falling more than two steps behind him. From the corner of his eye, Sasuke spots the kindergarten playground in the distance, and a lone figure standing in the center.

‘Nii-san!’

Swiftly he grabs her hand and breaks perpendicular to their trajectory, pulling her along with him. They run until they make it out of the woods, and Sasuke grins at the sight of Itachi looking confused to see his brother racing out of the woods with a girl in tow. The boys chasing them exit the woods not long after, hot in pursuit, before halting at the sight of Itachi.

Sasuke pulls the girl with him to stand behind his brother. Itachi glances at the pair, then at the pursuers, and quickly catches on. He stares at the boys and quirks an eyebrow, and that is enough. Itachi may be a gentle soul, but everyone knows better than to mess with him. In an instant they are scrambling to disperse from the playground, mumbling hurried apologies to Itachi. From behind him, Sasuke and the girl look at each other, and then break into full-bellied laughter.

Amused, Itachi bends down on his knee, “Care to explain what’s going on, little brother?”

Sasuke turns to him to answer but notices Itachi is looking downwards. He follows his brother’s gaze to where his hand is still wrapped around the girl’s.

Immediately he drops it and jumps a foot away.

Blushing and embarrassed, he explains to his brother what happened. Itachi listens patiently and then turns his attention to the grl. “Are you okay?” He asks. Mutely, she nods.

Before anything else can be said and done, a woman bursts onto the playground.

“Oh my god, there you are!” she exclaims, and runs to take the girl in her arms, “We’ve been looking all over for you!”

Moving back from the hug to take a look at her state, the woman gasps. “Sweetie, what happened?”

“Some boys were picking on me. He helped.” she says in a small voice, pointing her finger at Sasuke.

“Oh dear, thank you so much.” says the older woman as she pats him on the head. “She just wandered off. We were worried sick!”

“Come along now, sweetheart, we have to be on our way.” says the woman that Sasuke assumes is her mother, as she gently tugs her along in the direction of a car waiting by the roadside, a man standing by its side and waving.

“Wait!” the girl cries, and then turns to him, “What’s your name?” she asks, a desperate urgency ringing in her voice.

Sasuke knows because he feels it too.

“Sasuke!” he yells after her, because she is already halfway across the playground, “What’s yours?”

She breaks into the widest grin.

“Thank you, Sasuke-kun!” she yells back, “I love you!”

Her mother laughs loudly, and beside him Itachi huffs in amusement too. Sasuke is stunned, and can only stare as she gets into the car and drives away.

She has already disappeared over the horizon before his senses return.

‘Tch. Who says ‘I love you’ to someone they just met?’ he thinks, frowning all the way home. ‘Annoying.’

But his heart feels caught in quicksand, slowly sinking to his stomach.

She never did tell him her name.

x

There is a rumor spreading across their middle school that Sasuke likes girls with long hair, and he knows exactly what prompted it.

He jogs back from the track to the sidelines, breathing heavily, and then runs through his stretches. A brief cool-down later, he returns to the locker-room, trading in his sweaty track clothes for his standard school uniform. He finishes buttoning up his shirt, puts on his tie, and then reaches into his locker for one last thing.

He pulls out a red ribbon, and ties it around his hand.

Beside him, Naruto quips—

“Are you ever going to tell me why you wear that thing?” he asks, gesturing to the ribbon.

“Hn.” Sasuke grunts in the way of an answer.

“You know all your fangirls think that ribbon is reserved for your one true love , and if they make you fall in love with them you will tie that ribbon to their hair?” he questions, clasping his hands together in a decidedly feminine gesture for dramatic effect.

Sasuke rolls his eyes as he strolls out of the locker-room, with Naruto following behind him.

“I’m serious!” he insists, “I’ve seen them role-playing it after school!”

They settle into their seats for their next class, and Naruto pesters him again.

“Well? Is it true?” he wiggles his eyebrows, “Is this about a girl?”

Sasuke lets the question slide as he turns his attention out of the window. The horizon is endlessly far and there is a pang in his chest. If it’s about a girl, then it’s a girl he has never met again.

He never saw her again after that day, and figured she had only been visiting. As distinctive as her hair was, he was only a kid and the world was just too big to go looking. He doesn’t even know why he is looking, why even after all this time there is a feeling that something has been lost.

‘I’m a fool.’ he thinks, staring off into the distance.

“Or maybe it’s auntie Mikoto’s? Does leedul Sasu-cakes miss his mwommy?” Naruto continues to speculate.

Sasuke promptly smacks his best friend’s face into his desk.

x

Sakura watches Ito walk out from the classroom. He pauses briefly at the door, and turns around to flash her a forced smile that she returns with just as much strain. As soon as he is gone, she sinks into her seat. The love letter he wrote sits unopened in front of her. She is grateful, at the very least, that he chose to approach her after class when they had been alone. Others had not been so courteous, and her heart had lurched with each shake of her head in front of an audience of merciless classmates.

Not long after he is gone, Ino pokes her head into the room. Finding it bereft of anyone except her friend, she invites herself in.

“Well? What did he say? Actually nevermind that, what did you say?” her best friend interrogates her, and Sakura has no doubt she had been lurking just outside the classroom. She simply looks at the blonde and frowns.

“Seriously, forehead? Again?” exasperated, Ino plops down on the chair in front of her. “How many hearts do you intend to break, huh?”

“Why don’t you at least give someone a shot? What are you waiting for?” she eggs on.

Heaving a deep sigh, Sakura stares up at the ceiling. ‘What am I waiting for?’

“Earth to forehead? Hello? Anyway, since you’ve declined everyone who asked, you can be my date to the festival. Sai-kun will understand, he doesn’t care much for this stuff anyway.” Ino declares while inspecting her nails.

Sakura smiles at her friend.

“No, pig, you and Sai should go,” Sakura says, “I don’t think I am going anyway, I have to prepare for the university entrance exams.”

“Are you kidding me? Sakura, this is our final year of school. How can you miss the spring festival?” Ino is appalled.

Leaning back on her chair, Sakura scoffs. “It’s our final year, that’s why we need to study. We’ll have fun in college, okay?”

“You take this way too seriously, forehead. Are you that eager to leave us and run away to some big city?”

Sakura falters. A memory resurfaces. Being five years old, visiting her aunt in Tokyo, running through the woods, and then leaving much, much too soon.

To her relief, Ino isn’t waiting for a response.

“Well, let’s at least get some ice-cream on the way home.” she says, getting up. Smiling, Sakura joins her as they walk out of the empty classroom. “Just be careful Sak, the rate at which you’re going, you’ll end up passing right by your soulmate.” Ino says jokingly.

Sakura laughs along and tries to smother the voice inside her that says she might already have.

x

Sasuke finishes his last class for the day and unhurriedly strolls to his academic supervisor's office. He pauses in front of the office door and glances down at his watch. Two minutes late, not that it made a difference considering his supervisor. He knocks.

“Come in,” a lazy drawl beckons.

Sasuke walks into the office. “You asked to see me?” he inquires.

Hatake Kakashi leans back in his chair. “I did, have a seat.” he motions, “So Sasuke, have you given any thought to what you want to do after university?”

Sasuke shrugs.

Kakashi sighs and leans forward, resting his elbows on his desk. “Sasuke. You’re an excellent student, your grades are flawless, and you have so much potential. But all of that is lost if you have no ambition.” Kakashi looks at him with the slightest hint of frustration in his bored eyes, “You have a year of university left. Give it some thought. Ask yourself what gives you purpose.”

Sasuke nods, agreeing simply to end the meeting faster. Anticipating that he won’t get through to him, Kakashi dismisses him, promising to have another catch up after his mid-terms.

Sasuke walks out of the office, his book bag slung carelessly over one shoulder. Despite himself, he is pondering over the brief lecture he just received.

Ask yourself what gives you purpose.

“Tch.” Sasuke scowls in annoyance, and then halts his stride.

Though the scene itself plays in his mind like a vignette, blurry and faded at the seams, he still remembers the feeling of throwing his body forward on instinct, pushing off the bully from the girl fallen on the ground. He remembers standing between them and knowing with unflinching clarity that he had done the right thing. He sighs in disbelief at himself, even after all these years, living his life based on a stupid childhood memory.

On the way back to his dorm, he picks up a form for the police academy.

x

The announcer’s voice calls over the PA system, alerting the passengers on the train of the upcoming station.

Closing her book and stashing it in her bag, Sakura prepares to disembark. She glances at the door nearest to her, but finds it already packed with the rush-hour crowd, each one eager to be the first one out the doors when they open.

Instead of swimming through the hoard of people, she chooses to cross over to the only slightly less crowded adjacent compartment, hoping to deboard from there. Rubbing shoulders with the others that had the same idea, she traverses the narrow section that bridged the two coaches. Instantly, she feels a shift.

Anticipation coils in her stomach and all her nerve endings are firing in an urgent panic. It feels like crossing into a different world. ‘What is it?’ she thinks, trying to pinpoint the cause of her alarm. And then she spots it. On the far end of the compartment, peering into his phone, eighteen years older than the last time she saw him but nonetheless unmistakable, him .

She feels the urge to scream, but his name is caught somewhere between her lungs and her mouth. In the background, the speakers announce the opening of the doors.

Sakura feels the push from the people around her, and she feels like she is caught in the current of the sea, being sucked under again and again with nothing to hold on to, the water swallowing her voice. All of a sudden time slows to a standstill, and she watches as he lifts his head and looks in her direction. Their eyes meet.

There is a quiet murmur in her heart that she has carried with her most of her life. The one that piques up each time she thinks of him. The one that tells her it is all in her head, that he has already forgotten, that she has been building castles in the air all along. She feels that voice surface again, but then she sees his eyes widen, mirroring the alarm in her own.

He lifts his hand, and she catches a glimpse of an old familiar ribbon. The treacherous voice in her heart is silenced.

But the current around her persists, and she feels the tug of the crowd pull her along through the doors. One again she is five years old, watching helplessly as the distance between them grows.

She watches as he tries to wade through the crowd to reach her, but she has one foot on the train and one foot on the platform, and she knows he won’t make it. So, she decides to take this chance to answer a question she left unanswered many years ago.

She cups her hands around her mouth and yells, “Sakura!”

In the next moment, she is on the platform and the doors are closing. Rooted in place, she watches as the train begins to move and another chance slips away. An overwhelming sense of grief washes over her, but in the midst of her heartache is a small bud beginning to bloom.

‘He remembers.’

x

The day has not been going well for Sasuke. It started with being roped into attending a celebration with his batchmates to commemorate their passing out from the police academy. His social battery had long since run out, but the day wasn’t over. His parents had invited him to their home to celebrate his graduation with their extended family. Unfortunately, the celebration with his classmates dragged on longer than anticipated, and he had ended up missing the train that would have taken him to his parents home. Now he was forced to board a different train instead, one that required him to deboard and connect to a different line midway, and he had to do it during the evening rush hour.

‘Just great.’

Standing cramped against the back of the compartment, Sasuke distracts himself on his phone and hopes for the journey to end as quickly as possible. Twenty minutes into the ride, he has drowned out all the nearby chatter, the announcements over the speakers, the screech of the train wheels slowing down to a stop. Then he feels it, the shift in the air.

As if his body already knows what his mind is yet to discover, his gaze lifts from his phone to the other end of the compartment where the people planning to deboard are crowding. And there she is, bright green eyes, looking at him.

He hears his heart thumping in his ears.

He sees the surprise in her eyes, along with the slightest tinge of hesitation. On instinct, Sasuke lifts his hand over the bobbing heads in the crowd, to show her the faded red fabric that he has held on to for the last eighteen years, and watches as the doubt in her eyes dissolves. But all too soon the crowd begins to move, pulling her along. He sees the panic building in her eyes, and he is already pushing through the crowd to reach her. The divide between them is just too wide though, and he can feel time slipping through his fingers like sand. He has felt this feeling before, though he was too young then to understand its gravity. The weight of watching the course of your life change before your very eyes, like a train shifting tracks, moving away from what could have been.

She must know he wasn’t going to make it too, because just as she is being swept through the doors, she turns around and shouts—

“Sakura!” —the answer to a question long unforgotten.

In the next moment, she has bled out with the crowd, the doors have closed, and all the air in the cabin has left with her.

Sasuke watches in agony as she gets further and further away, unmindful of the people around him staring at his crazed state. He races out of the train at the following stop and catches the next one headed in the opposite direction back to where he lost her. He steps foot on the platform and is overwhelmed with the desire to run in every direction at once, but despite all his searching, he doesn’t find her.

Exhausted, he plops down on a station bench. Despite everything, in his defeat there is a sliver of redemption.

‘She remembers.’

x

A chill cuts through the autumn air as Sasuke crouches behind the boxes piled in the warehouse, waiting for backup. What started as a low-stakes inspection of a tip-off evolved into a drug bust gone very wrong. Beside him, Juugo coordinated with the en-route backup while Sasuke kept lookout, monitoring the movements of the cartel as well as searching for Suigetsu and Karin, their two other officers who had splintered off early into their inspection.

"Ten minutes." Juugo confirms the status of the backup's arrival and Sasuke nods.

Just then there is a commotion, and Sasuke feels a chill run down his spine as one of the cartel members drags Karin out to the center of the room.

"Found her hiding behind the loading dock!" he announces. There is a brief pause of contemplation before a man, that Sasuke assumes is the kingpin, announces—

"Pack everything up, we're clearing out."

There is a flurry of activity as the men follow what they have been instructed. Sasuke grinds his teeth, but keeps his eyes trained on Karin.

"What do we do with her?" asks the man who dragged her in and is still keeping her arms pinned behind her.

The leader gestures to the man on his right, "Kill her. Put the body in one of the crates."

'Shit.'

The man nods, and Sasuke stiffens at the sound of the gun cocking.

He watches as tears stream down Karin’s face as she looks into the barrel of the gun. This time around, his feet want to remain rooted to the ground. There is no tug, no reckless abandon from his youth. But there is a sense of duty, and so, Sasuke leaves the sanctuary of his hiding spot and tackles the armed man to the ground. In no time at all, the entire warehouse springs into action, and multiple men launch themselves at him. Sasuke parries a blow from one, and maneuvers to throw the goon over his shoulder, while Juugo provides cover by firing from his spot behind the crates. In the distance, Sasuke can hear the sirens of police cars nearby, but each passing moment has slowed down to be an eternity long. From the corner of his eye, he sees Suigetsu use the cover of the chaos to pull Karin away from the action and he breathes a sigh of relief.

In the next instant there is a searing pain in his side, and whatever little relief he felt is replaced by agony. Though he is aware of exactly what has conspired, Sasuke doesn’t look down, because seeing where the bullet went through him would make everything a little too permanent. His knees hit the floor just as the warehouse fills up with an influx of police officers. The call of duty that pushed him this far finally eases up, and Sasuke ceases his struggle against his body and mind. Lying on the cold concrete floor, Sasuke offers a quiet apology to his family for the pain he is going to cause them, and in the final moments of his consciousness, he wonders if the afterlife will be small enough to go searching for green eyes.

x

“Paging all Emergency Medicine staff. Please report immediately to Trauma Bay One, I repeat—”

Sakura pauses mid-signature as the announcement blares over the speakers, right as her pager begins to beep. Quickly closing the chart she was working on, she sprints off in the direction of the trauma department.

Arriving on the scene, she runs up to the attending surgeon, “What’s going on?” she asks, out of breath.

“There was an encounter between the police and a drug cartel downtown. We are receiving multiple gunshot victims.” answers Tsunade, “Kenji take the first one, Sakura you’re in charge of the second, I’ll take the third.” she orders, just as the paramedics pull up to the bay.

The first gurney rolls in carrying a man bleeding from his leg, with his hand tied to the side of the stretcher with handcuffs. Sakura guesses he is one of the cartel members as Kenji breaks off to inspect his patient. The second gurney brings in Sakura’s patient, also in handcuffs, with a bullet in his shoulder and a deep gash across his forehead. Sakura runs to his side as they roll him towards the operating theater. Behind her she hears the third patient being rolled in.

“He is one of ours, he was shot during the encounter.” an accompanying police officer tells Tsunade.

She feels a familiar tug at her heart.

Turning around, she catches the briefest glimpse as the nurses roll him away, but it is enough. She is always looking for that face, after all.

Her heart sinks to her stomach.

x

As wakefulness slowly seeps into his consciousness, Sasuke struggles to remember where he is and what happened. Then the pain kicks in and all his memories resurface. Slowly blinking his eyes open, he takes in the harsh, clinical white of his hospital room ceiling, tethered to consciousness by the routine beeping of the machines he is hooked up to.

Near his abdomen is a lopsided sensation. On the side he was shot is a searing pain, the sensation of an open wound replaced by that of his skin being uncomfortably stretched and sown. On the other side is a dull, weighted pressure.

He looks down to see a figure in blue scrubs sitting by his bedside, head resting on his side, and a waterfall of pink across his middle. The pace of the heart monitor picks up.

Slowly, the slumbering form rouses, awakened by the broken rhythm of the beeping. Sasuke watches as her brows furrow, trying to hang on to the fading traces of sleep. Her eyelids take their time to open, and the wait as they flutter is utter agony. Then she glances up at him, and her eyes widen as realization dawns upon her. There it is, he thinks, that brilliant green.

“You’re awake.” she says, breathlessly.

Without waiting for a response, she lifts her head from his side and immediately he misses the pressure. She pushes back the chair she has been sitting in and jogs out of the room. His heart panics like a caged animal and he wants to call after her, but his throat is parched and no sound comes out. In a few moments she returns, and in her hands is a familiar red ribbon.

“They had to cut you out of your clothes to operate, but I thought you might want this back so I kept it.” she tells him as she places the ribbon at his bedside table and pours a glass of water. She brings it up to his lips and he hungrily drinks it up, relishing how it drowned the thorns in his throat.

“Thank you.” he says, voice still hoarse. She smiles lightly in response as she sets the glass back on the table, then settles back into the chair she had been occupying before.

There is a pause.

Much of him is still suspended in disbelief. All these years he spent looking, only to wake up to her suddenly by his side. He can see the turmoil in her eyes too, as she stares at him with a frown, biting her lip as she searches for something to say. What do you even say to someone you have spent your whole life searching for but know nothing about, he wonders.

“I waited,” she says abruptly, and then shrinks just a little, like she surprised herself by the confession, “at the train station, I mean” she adds, as if trying to lighten the intensity of what she said. They are still strangers after all. In his mind, the memory of an ‘Iloveyou’ screamed across a playground echoes back.

“Aa.” he nods in agreement, “I did too.”

‘At the station, at the playground, at every turn and intersection, in every crowd’ , but he leaves that part out.

She smiles the sweetest, softest smile, and he decides it was all worth it for this alone.

“I should go now, I have rounds.” she glances at the door, “I’ll let Tsunade know you’re awake, she’ll want to check on you.”

“But after my shift I could swing by with some dinner, if you’d like?” she asks bashfully, “It’s only hospital food, but I have some seasoning packets I keep in my locker that make it a little bearable. But if you want to rest instead that’s totally okay, you’ve been through a lot and—”

“Sakura” he interrupts her rambling, “Dinner sounds good.”

She beams, and it’s a brand new start.

x

“Who says ‘I love you’ to someone they just met?” he asks out of the blue.

They’re on the couch in the living room, in the apartment they’ve been sharing for the past two years. He is turned towards the TV while she is deep into a book, sitting with her back pressed into his side, legs thrown over the arm of the sofa.

She scoffs at his question.

“What kind of a battle-cry is ‘I’m not stupid’?” she challenges back.

When he doesn’t respond to her jab she cranes her neck to look back at him, and finds there is no mischief in his eyes, only a solemn intensity. She closes her book and sits up, turning around to face him fully.

“Hm.” she says as she ponders, “I’m not sure.”

“I just...felt something big.” she says, “It felt like you were slipping away before I even had a chance to hold on and I was desperate to make you understand what I was feeling— and love was the only thing that seemed big enough.”

He nods like he knows exactly what she means, and she smiles.

“Besides,” she says, throwing her arms around his neck and leaning in close enough to brush her nose against his, “I was right, wasn’t I?”

“Hn.” he gives her a sideways smile, and closes the distance between them.

Fin.

AN: A mediocre execution of the extraordinary @disquieted‘s beautiful story idea. Thanks my love! And happy SS month to everyone! I love this community so much and I am so excited to see what’s in store.

[beauvibaby]

figure it out – f.andersen

summary: Freddie andersen falls for his sons nanny or his sons nanny falls for him

warnings: brief smut towards the end, oh and I didn’t proofread this 😅

You stepped out of the car with a nervous smile, you could spot the tall guy with the red hair a mile away, his back was towards you as he pushed his son on the swing.

“He’s a great guy, you’ll get along great, his son is the sweetest.” Your friends words rang through your mind as you smoothed out your blouse, “Mr. Andersen?” You called softly as you approached the swing set, he glanced over his shoulder as he caught his sons swing, the three year old turned to look as well, a smile forming on his face. “Y/N?” Freddie spoke, helping his son hop down. “The one and only.” You laughed, squatting to the little boys height, “I’ve been told that your name is, oh let me think.” You teased, rubbing your chin in thought, the boy giggled at you, hugging the side of his fathers leg, “is your name, Joseph?” You concluded, watching him nod brightly. “Joey.” He mumbled, cheeks flushing pink as his dad ruffled his hair. You held your hand out for the young boy, “my name is Y/N. It’s very nice to meet you, Joey.” You watched as he hesitantly grabbed your hand, giving it a small shake.

“Call me Freddie.” His dad spoke as you stood to your full height, “go play while Miss Y/N and I talk, ok?” Freddie spoke to his son who bounded off to the playground where other kids were playing. You sat down across from him at one of the tables, and your friend was right, she was so right. You and Freddie got along very well, which is so important as a nanny, you need to feel comfortable and be able to talk to the parents you work with. He hired you on the spot, anxious to have you start, the season was just about to kick off, and so he wanted to have you on for a few weeks before he had to start traveling. This was what you did full time, so your schedule was fully open, and of course he told you if you ever felt like it was too much or you needed days off, to tell him, you assured him you would be fine.

It was a few days later when you went to his home,Joey was at preschool, needing to be picked up soon and you were going to go with Freddie so you could be added to the list of people allowed to pick up his son. First though, he showed you around the house, where everything was, what Joey normally liked to do, and eat, assuring you that you were welcome to anything you’d like as well, which everyone always said but you never indulged in. “The pool, he loves to go swimming, but he’s not good at it, but I’m fine with you taking him if you don’t mind going in with him.” Freddie explained as he stepped out onto the patio, his condo overlooking the complex pool. You nodded with a smile, “I think I could handle that.” You laughed breathily as Freddie glanced over at you. “I’ve got an extra car seat, I can put it in for you if you’d like.” He spoke on his way out, knowing you needed one for picking up and driving Joey. “Oh, that would be great, please.” You answered softly, he nodded, grabbing it out of the closet before following you down to your car.

He quickly installed it and you followed him to the school, “Joey is really excited to see you, he didn’t stop talking about you.” Freddie admitted as he opened the door for you, a small thank you fell from your lips, “that’s sweet, I’m excited to see him.” You grinned, it was quite simple to add you to the list, and then you were off to his classroom, following behind Freddie as he knew his way around the school, it was relatively small, so you knew it wouldn’t be too bad once you got used to it.

“Joey, your dads here.” You heard an older woman speak from inside, you stepped up beside Freddie watching Joey look over and see you both standing there. Joey grabbed his bag and ran over, squeezing his fathers legs as the teacher smiled at you, you took the moment to introduce yourself, telling her you’d be taking care of Joey when Freddie was working, so she’d be seeing more of you. You went your separate ways as Joey tugged on your hand, insisting he tell you about his day as you walked alongside him and his dad. You listened intently, throwing in commentary whenever it was required, getting giggles from the young boy who looked much like his father, except slightly lighter hair, strawberry blonde you could say.

“Alright, Joey. I’ll see you tomorrow, I’m going to pick you up while your dad works, alright?” You spoke to him, he nodded with bright eyes, climbing into his seat in his dads car. “Bye, Y/N.” Freddie smiled as you began walking to your car, “bye!” You called giddily, excited for your first real day with them, it had been hard when you had to move on from the last family you watched, but this made it exciting all over again.

***

“Alright, Joey, what should we do first?” You asked the four year old as you slipped off his and yours shoes by the front door, “can I have a snack?” He asked with a tilt of his head. “Of course!” You smiled down at him, giggling as he grabbed your hand and pulled you to the kitchen, as if you didn’t know where it was, you let him have the moment. “Goldfish?” He asked hopefully, you nodded and pulled them out for him, tearing the top open on the snack size bag. “Thank you.” He skipped his way to the living room with his bag, Freddie told you he was pretty relaxed about tv time, considering Joey wasn’t very interested in it, mostly watching an episode or two of one of his kid shows before being too antsy to sit still. “What’s your favorite color?” He asked, sitting directly beside you on the couch. “Purple, yours?” You responded, shifting to be facing him, “green!” He answered with a goldfish in his mouth. “I’m sure your dad has told you not to talk with your mouth full.” You teased him, he nodded with wide eyes, covering his mouth with his hand as he murmured an apology. “It’s ok, bud.” You pushed his floppy hair back.

He subconsciously leaned into your hand, and you often wondered if he’s ever had a stable woman figure in his life. Freddie very briefly mentioned his mother, only saying that they don’t speak of her, especially around Joey. “Don’t eat too much, your dad should be home in time for you to have dinner with him.” You reminded the young boy as he continued to munch on the cracker snacks. “Ok, I’m done.” He announced, climbing off the couch and going to put his bag in the trash, you held in a giggle at the way he was so confident in it, it was purely adorable. “Do you want to color?” You offered to him as he came over and stared blankly at you. “Yeah.” He jumped up and down. “Come on miss Y/N.” He cheered, rushing down the hall to his room. You came to the conclusion that he would keep you on your toes, in the best possible way. You spent the rest of the day doing small activities, coloring, playing with building blocks, all the way down to Joey falling asleep curled into your side when Freddie walked in from a late afternoon practice. You shushed him immediately, watching his eyebrows raise as he stepped in closer to see his son asleep under your arm.

“Was he good?” Freddie whispered, squatting in front of the couch, pushing a hand through his sons hair. “So good, he’s an easy kid.” You responded, watching Joey whine and lean away from his dads touch, not really aware of who it was. “Joey, you gotta get up otherwise you won’t sleep tonight.” Freddie explained, running his thumb over his sons chubby cheek. The boy huffed, fluttering his eyes open, reaching for his dad who only grinned, welcoming him with open arms. “Did you have fun with Miss Y/N?” He asked Joey, that seemed to wake the boy up, “yes! She’s so much fun.” He wiggled in his dad's arms, “I have to show you something.” Freddie laughed at Joey’s demand, setting him down and watching him run off. You stood, beginning to gather your things, “tomorrow I have to leave a little earlier than I thought, can you do dinner for him?” Freddie hated to begin placing you under his ever changing schedule, but you knew it was part of the job, you understood what he did, and you knew it required you to be understanding with his schedule. “Of course.” You assured him, looking over as you hear Joey running back over. He showed his dad the drawing you two had done together. “For you.” He spoke to Freddie, giving him the paper.

You made sure you had all your things as they had their little moment.

***

The next few months went on like this, the three of you growing closer, becoming very comfortable with each other, you and Freddie speaking easily, whether it directly related to Joey or not, never inappropriate, he would just tell you something that happened on his road trip, little things.

Freddie was on the road when Joey caught a stomach bug at school, you rushed to pick him up, after the school had called you when Freddie hadn’t answered, he called you frantically as you were carrying Joey through the front door. “It’s alright, I got him.” You assured the frantic father, he started to say he could come home and you instantly gasped. “No! You guys are playing great, I can handle a stomach bug, he’ll be one hundred percent better when you get home.” You assured him, letting him talk to Joey who was half asleep in your arms after throwing up as soon as he had gotten out of your car. The rest of that night was spent with a mini trash can at your feet as Joey was clingy and sticky from sweating, you kissed his warm forehead, shushing him as he sniffled, complaining of his throat burning. “I know bud, come on, let’s get you some water and then try to get some sleep.” You soothed him, carefully standing with him hugging you tightly. “I’m hungry.” He curled into himself as you set him on the counter so you could grab some water for his cup. “Did you want to have some toast? That’ll make your tummy feel better.” You offered to him, he gave you a weak nod as his clammy skin sat against the cool marble countertops.

Eventually he went to bed, feeling a little better, but you left him shirtless, and turned his fan up a speed as he was still running pretty warm, and left his door and yours open so you could hear him better if he woke in the middle of the night, which he did. Emptying his stomach before he could even process what happened, one cleanup later, he was laying beside you in the guest room, the poor boy too nervous to sleep on his own after that. You tossed and turned most of the night as he finally slept, feeling the nausea begin to hit you.

You were able to keep it at bay until the morning, when you woke up to sprint to the bathroom, cringing as you woke Joey in the process. He stayed in the bed, looking towards the bathroom in concern. “Miss Y/N.” He called softly, his feet hitting the floor as he slid off the bed, “I’m fine bub, I’ll be out in a minute.” You spoke as you finally caught your breath, he peeked his head in, frowning as he saw you hunched down over the toilet. He tiptoed in and placed his hand on his back, rubbing it like you had been doing to him the night before. “Oh,” you gasped softly, quickly flushing the toilet and standing up, “are you sick?” He asked with a pout, following you to the sink where you brushed your teeth as the tiredness sat in. “No, no, I’m fine.” You assured him, fake it until you make it right?

You were proved so wrong as the day went on and Joey got his energy back, of course it was a Saturday so he didn’t have school, so he was bouncing off the walls all day while you tried to keep up, telling yourself that Freddie would be back this evening and you’d be able to go home and rest in your own home, not having to worry about a child walking in on you puking. “Miss Y/N got sick from me daddy.” Joey cried to his father as he came in, you’d unknowingly fallen asleep on the couch, but shooting awake when you heard the strangled cry from Joey. “Joey! Joey.” You gasped eyes darting around the room, guilt immediately hitting you when you saw him crying into Freddie’s shoulder as the ginger haired man looked at you in concern. Your heart broke as Joey cried, apologizing for getting you sick. “Oh no, honey.” You cooed, walking over to him, swallowing down your upset stomach, though you were certain by now there was nothing left in it. “It’s alright, I took care of you knowing I could get sick, and I did that because I really really care about you.” You explained to him, placing a hand on his back so he would lift his head from Freddie’s shoulder. “Ok.” He sniffled, “I love you.” The small boy whispered with a sheepish smile, Freddie froze, glancing at his son in shock, “I love you too bud.” You smiled at him, easing Freddie’s worries that it would scare you off. It was common for kids to say that, especially when they spent so much time with someone.

“Are you sure you’re ok to drive home?” Freddie asked as you grabbed your things, you nodded weakly, shooting him a smile, he mirrored it wearily. “Be careful.” He bid you a goodbye, telling you to take the next couple of days to recoup, he only had one practice, and he said he would figure something out with Joey.

When you got home you crashed immediately, but you’d find yourself waking up the next morning to a text from Freddie questioning if you got home safely.

***

A few more weeks had passed, and tonight you were taking Joey to a Leafs game, per his request and Freddie’s agreement. You were both excited, and Freddie would be lying if he said he didn’t find the excitement adorable. He found himself gifting you with a leafs jersey, a plain jersey, despite how badly he was itching to see you in his number. He felt wrong to feel the way he did for you, you were his sons nanny, it was cliche and all the things he never wanted to happen. But he couldn’t help it, you were so incredibly beautiful in his eyes, and the fact that Joey loved you and loved being around you, only made him fall farther and faster. He could see a life with you, with the three of you all together, but he couldn’t say that, he couldn’t risk scaring you off and making his son upset– Joey came before everything, even if it meant he had to hide his feelings for you.

“Woo!” You cheered as the teams skated out for the final period, the leafs up by three, Joey was jumping excitedly beside you, clapping and shouting as his dad waved in the direction of your seats. It warmed your heart as you hoisted him up to your hip so he could see better. They went on to win the game, Freddie nearly getting a shutout, but a puck slipped passed him at the last second. You and Joey were cheering louder than everyone else, or so it seemed to you as you let the young boy bang his hand on the glass, Auston came by, smiling brightly at you, having never properly met you, but he knew oh so much about you.

You did as Freddie said and told the security guard your name and pulled Joey along to the hallway outside the locker rooms. The two of you sitting slumped against the wall as you waited what felt like an eternity for them to start emerging, Auston, one of the few you felt like you knew fairly well from Freddie’s stories, was first, coming over and introducing himself as Joey jumped into his “uncles” arms. You smiled at the sight, “oh, so he did chicken out, got you a plain jersey.” Auston spoke up, your cheeks burned with heat, “what?” You asked softly, Freddie saw the two of you talking and began to panic and started speed walking over, Auston went to speak but Joey shouted for his dad and it distracted him. “Hey buddy.” Freddie grinned, hugging his son tightly, smiling over at you. “It was nice to meet you, Y/N.” Auston mumbled, smiling slyly as he backed away, leaving the three of you alone. “Good game.” You smiled up at him, Joey kissing his dad's cheek with a grin, his jersey cuffed so his hands were free. “Thank you.” Freddie answered, something a little different in his smile, you took notice of that as you checked the time. “You should head out, don’t you have that thing with your mom tomorrow?” Freddie spoke up, sending your heart into a flutter. You did a double take, hardly even remembering how you’d mentioned that to him earlier in the week, making sure you’d have the day off. “I-uh, yeah, I do. You remembered?” You couldn’t help but let the words fall past your lips as Joey started drifting off with his head on Freddie’s shoulder.

“Of course I did.” He admitted, with a pink tint to his cheeks as he adjusted his arms around Joey. “Thank you, goodnight Freddie, goodnight, J.” You whispered to the half asleep boy, he smiled nuzzling his head closer to his dad, giving you a sleepy wave. “Goodnight, Y/N.” Freddie responded as you started walking off.

You told yourself it was nothing on the drive home, that he was just being polite, that his smile wasn't different even though it definitely was.

***

Auston stared at his older friend incredulously, “it’s family skate!” Freddie protested, Auston raised his eyebrows, “so? She’s family by now isn’t she? Even if you didn’t feel like this for her she’s basically another parent to Joey.” He pointed out, watching the ginger shake his head with a groan. “What if she thinks it’s weird?” Freddie questioned, once again Auston sighed, shaking his head. “Believe, I’m pretty sure she feels the same way for you. She definitely won’t make a move because if she does she’s the one who could lose her job.” Auston reminded him before changing the subject, no longer wanting to argue with the stubborn man.

***

“I don’t know how to skate.” You blurted at the last second, Freddie and Joey looking at you shocked, he’d asked you to go to the family skate with him and Joey, your heart skipped a beat and you said yes, thinking maybe you could teach yourself before then but you hadn’t had the chance. “You don’t know how to skate.” Freddie repeated, nodding his head slowly, “guess we’ll have to teach you.” He added, smiling at Joey who was nodding eagerly. You hesitantly agreed, worried you’d end up with a broken bone. Freddie brushed off your concerns as he told you how to properly tighten your skates as he adjusted Joey’s, letting Auston whisk him off with his sisters who were just as excited to see the little boy. That left you and Freddie alone. “Where’s my teacher?” You joked, looking for Joey, Freddie mocked offense, “he had other clients, I guess I’ll have to suffice.” He offered you a hand to get up from the bench, “thanks.” You whispered, carefully following him the few steps over to the ice. You grimaced as he easily moved around, waiting for you to set the bladed shoe down on it. You did so and immediately tensed up, feeling a little nervous at how slippery it felt beneath you. “Here.” Freddie gave you his hands once again.

You knew deep down it was more than being friendly, but again you kept telling yourself it was just him being nice. Setting a good example for his son, despite him being nowhere near the two of you. “Oh god.” You yelped, squeezing his hands a little tighter as he slowly tugged you along, directing you on how to move your feet. You tried following his instructions, but you were never the most coordinated, “Y/N.” He laughed heartily, a sound you didn’t know you loved until right now. “I’m not going to let you-“ he stopped as you nearly fell but he quickly shot his hands around your waist to grab you, “fall.” He mumbled, nose nearly touching yours. It felt like a moment out of a movie as you looked into his eyes, your heart beating so fast you wouldn’t be surprised if he could hear it. “Freddie.” You whispered, neither of you daring to pull away, he stayed silent, you could practically see the wheels turning in his head. “Freddie, people are staring.” You whispered again, he nodded, clearing his throat as he put more space between you. “You good?” He asked, skating towards the exit, he helped you over to the bench once you assured him you were fine. “I need a second, can you just keep an eye on Joey.” He didn’t give you a chance to answer before he was easily walking off in the skates, you took notice of Mitch and Auston quickly going to find him.

Your eyes went wide as you heard a familiar cry, you rushed to your feet having already taken the skates off, you looked around in a panic for Joey, trying to follow the noise, of course it was coming from the ice. Thankfully one of Auston’s sisters was skating over to you with Joey, “he fell and hit his head, I’m sure he’s fine, just a little shaken up.” She explained to you, as Joey was placed into your arms crying. You nodded as he squeezed you, silently telling her it was fine as you turned to tend to the boy, you kneeled in front of him, setting him on the bench. “Hey, you’re ok, bud, you’re tough.” You soothed him, seeing the red patch on his skin where he fell, nothing worse than he could’ve done on the hardwoods at home. “It hurts.” He sniffled, wiping his nose on his sleeve. “I know, but you took it like a champ.” You assured him, wiping the last of his tears away as Freddie started speed walking over. “Ok.” He mumbled, looking down at his skates, “do you want to take a break?” Freddie asked softly, Joey nodding sheepishly. You loosened his laces and pulled the skates off, he mumbled a thank you before making grabby hands at his dad.

You tried to brush off the awkward silence between you and Freddie, Joey whispered something to Freddie who nodded, setting him down and letting him run off to the food court where Mitch and Steph were. “Y/N, can we talk?” Freddie asked, watching as you nodded slowly, hesitantly. “Did I do something wrong?” You asked instantly, he went wide eyed, “no, no of course not.” He rushed, “I just-on the ice I, ugh, I wanted to kiss you.” He mumbled, not looking over at you as his cheeks burned red. You held in a noise of shock, “why didn’t you?” You questioned, his head snapped up, his brown eyes searching your face for the disappointment that he so clearly heard in your voice. “Because, I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.” You took a leap of faith as you stepped towards him, tipping your head back to look up at him, “you won’t make me uncomfortable.” You assured him. He didn’t hesitate to cup your face and press his lips to yours, he kept it short and sweet, but just enough. He smiled as he pulled away, your eyes stayed shut for a moment as you took in the sensation. Neither of you said anything, it kind of went unspoken as he grabbed your hand, pulling you over to the ice. “Skate with me?” He asked, giving you a smile that warmed your heart. “Only if you don’t let me fall.” You giggled, stepping into the ice with more confidence this time around. “You know I won’t.” He stayed alongside you, squeezing your hand every once in a while as you skated in a few circles around the rink.

Joey was sleeping peacefully in his room, oblivious to the conversation you and Freddie were having in the living room. “Why does this mean for us?” You asked softly, hugging your knees to your chest, looking over at Freddie, unsure of what this new step would mean for you both. “I like you, quite a lot, and I think you feel the same.” He trailed off, stretching his legs out in front of him, slouching slightly against the couch. “I do.” You agreed with him, smiling as he laid his hand on the couch, palm up. You reached over and laced your fingers together, “so that means we figure it out.” He mumbled happily. “Figure it out.” You confirmed.

***

And that’s what you guys have been doing, a little over a month has passed, you were taking it slow, but yet at the same time as you were so intertwined in their life’s, it felt like you’d skipped straight to the good part, being active in Joey’s life, and being the woman that Freddie wanted to come straight home too. He’d offered to find someone else to watch Joey, not wanting you to feel odd about still technically being paid to take care of him, but you loved Joey too much, it didn’t bother you so it didn’t bother Freddie.

“When will daddy be home?” Joey asked sleepily as you closed the book, having just read to him for half an hour as he kept requesting another story. “He’ll be home really late, bub, but he’ll be here when you wake up in the morning, promise.” You assured him as he looked up at you with sleepy eyes, his arm clutched around the teddy bear he adored. “Goodnight, mommy.” He murmured, eyes already falling shut, you held in a sharp breath, unsure on what to say, or what to do. “Goodnight.” You whispered as you tiptoed out of the room, your heart slamming against your chest as you shut his door. Your hands shook as you ran a hand over your face, sighing deeply as you trudged to the kitchen to clean up the mess from dinner, making a plate for Freddie and putting it in the fridge, he’d be home in a couple of hours, and the plate in the fridge had became a tradition of yours long before he confessed his feelings. Your phone started vibrating in your pocket as you washed the dishes, you quickly dried off your hand and answered the phone, putting it on speaker as you continued. “Hey.” You spoke nervously, “hey, everything ok?” Freddie asked instantly, hearing the nervousness in your voice. “Yeah, yes.” You mumbled, “babe.” He cautioned, already tired from the difficult game he had just played and lost, his heart heavy in his chest, wanting to come home two his favorite people. Their playoff spot is now gone, “Joey called me mommy.” You blurted, the line falling silent on both ends as the only noise heard was the water running in the sink.

“Freddie?” You questioned, he cleared his throat, “I’m sorry, I’ll talk to him about that.” He muttered, “no, it’s fine, he was just tired, I’m sure it was nothing.” You rambled, sighing as he gave you a grunt in response. “I’m sorry about the game.” You whispered, he muttered a soft ok. Not speaking after that. You didn’t want to guilt him after all of this, but his reaction was worse than you had expected, and it only made you worry further that this wasn’t at all what he really wanted. “There’s dinner in the fridge, goodnight, Fred.” You muttered, “Y/N.” He started, but then fell silent again, you shook your head to yourself, “goodnight.” He whispered before hanging up.

You climbed into the bed that night with tears in your eyes. Worried about the entire situation, you knew it would be hard, adjusting, it wasn’t the typical relationship, it was more complicated.

Freddie checked on Joey before padding down the hall to see you, it wasn’t odd for him to find you in his room, it’s never been anything more than just sleeping beside each other, and he could tell he’d upset you on the phone, but when he walked into his room and didn’t see you, he panicked for a moment. He cursed to himself as he quickly changed into a pair of sweatpants, now walking to the other side of the house where the guest room was.

He stepped into the room, looking at the way you were asleep with a tissue clutched in your hand, your phone landing beside your head when you’d finally given into the sleep. He took the few steps over to you, carefully placing your phone on the nightstand, pulling the tissue from your grasp, you didn’t stir, surprisingly until he was climbing in behind you. “It’s just me.” He murmured when you inhaled sharply, you stayed silent, relaxing when he placed a hand on your side. “I’m sorry.” He whispered, kissing the back of your shoulder, “I’m sorry too.” You sighed, rolling to your back to look at him. “You didn’t do anything.” He furrowed his eyebrows at you, tucking some hair behind your ear. “For the game, for acting the way I did when you reacted like that.” You explained, leaning into the hand he had on your cheek, “it’s alright.” He lowered his head down to kiss you, it was lazy and sloppy, the both of you feeling a need to be close.

You ran your hand over his chest, lightly pushing him to his back as you followed him, straddling him gently, his hands dipped under your shirt, caressing your bare skin, relishing in the faint moan that fell from your lips as you pulled away to breathe. “We don’t-“ you cut him off, “I want too.” You looked down at him with hooded eyes, he nodded, slowly pushing the hem of your shirt up. He swallowed as he watched you pull it off, letting it fall on the floor beside the bed. “Baby.” His hands slid up your sides, over your chest, his calloused fingers touching every inch of exposed skin. “Freddie.” You hummed, tipping your head back, rolling your hips in response. It wasn’t rushed or urgent, it was slow as you both pushed and pulled on the remaining clothing. Freddie sat up to kiss you, keeping himself steady with one hand as he wrapped his other arm around your back as you sunk down on him. You dug your nails into the back of his shoulder as you had to adjust to him, his lips trailed across your neck, murmuring sweet praises. You began to rock your hips, loving the way Freddie moaned against your shoulder as he kept your bodies close together. “You feel so good.” He praised as you began moving with more speed, between the tiredness and the emotions you’d been feeling, it didn’t take long for that familiar feeling to tighten in your stomach.

Freddie took over, flipping you to your back, moving in and out of you with his own urgency as you clenched around him. Your gasps and moans only fueled him on as he found his own release, “Freddie.” You tilted your head back, cursing softly as he rested half on top of you, catching his breath, you ran a hand through his hair, his lips ghosting across your throat as he worked his way back up to your lips. “I love you.” He murmured, “I should’ve said that before.” He added quickly, releasing how bad it made him look to be saying that in this position. “I love you too.” You sighed, you guys would figure it out, just like you had done so far.

***

Joey tugged on Freddie’s jacket, pulling him away from where the two of you were swaying to the music, you watched Freddie bend down to let Joey speak in his ear, now six years old. Freddie nodded, winking at you as he made his way over to his family, “I want to dance with you, mommy.” He wrapped his arms around your waist, his head resting on your stomach, having just hit a growth spurt, already showing his fathers height, the sight of him hugging you in your white gown, and him in his little suit just warmed your heart. “Of course, baby.” You whispered, placing a hand on his back and one on his arm as he swayed with you.

You figured it out, just like you always did.

Taglist: @heybarzy @literarycharleton @kiedhara @mandypants95

[kaimelia]

fix you

a/n: hi! I received an ask a while ago asking if I wanted amelia to be pregnant in s18, and this is how I would want it to play out if she was!

also, i may not be posting for a little. my grandmother passed away yesterday, so life’s a little rough right now :( this was pre-written

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Two lines.

Two lines staring back at her, two lines that were aggressively red, two lines that she had been dreading seeing.

She'd ignored the symptoms for the longest time. Her late cycle was blamed on stress, weight gain due to the lack of care for herself, nausea stemming from how anxious she constantly felt.

It wasn't until Meredith noticed how Scout had been acting oddly and mentioned how clingy Bailey had gotten while she was pregnant with Ellis, as Scout had just finished crying after Amelia put him in his crib and put him back on her hip to calm him.

She snuck two pregnancy tests into their grocery run the next day, and maybe Meredith had seen it, but she knew not to say anything.

And now, she was on the floor of the bathroom, waiting for the results of the second stick to confirm her fear. That she was pregnant.

Having a second child had previously been hypothetical, and even the thought of it caused Amelia to feel ill. Now, she wasn't sure if she was about to puke because of the baby inside of her or because she knew about the baby inside of her.

And then, Meredith was behind her, running a hand up and down Amelia's back as Amelia heaved the little food she had forced herself to eat that morning despite how terrible she felt. "Amelia," Meredith whispered, sitting down beside her sister after she finished throwing up, "hey, you're okay." Amelia noticed how the other woman had started using her 'Mom' voice, the same one she used to comfort Ellis after she scraped her knee on the playground. She frowned. "How far along?"

"I don't know, maybe six weeks? I've only missed one period," she muttered, gripping the side of the ceramic bowl. "I can't do this, Mer; I can't bring another kid into this world." Meredith placed her hand on Amelia's shoulder and squeezed it gently.

"And you don't have to. You have options, Amelia; you're early enough that if you don't want to have this baby, it's as easy as going to a clinic and taking a pill." The neurosurgeon reached up, flushing the toilet and watching as the water swirled around. "You're hesitant."

"Link wants another kid," she muttered, staring at the water as it calmed in the bowl.

"Link hasn't been here except to pick up Scout, Amelia. You should tell him, but what he wants shouldn't dictate the decision you make."

"He wants another kid, and I don't know if he'll still love me if I don't want that, too. But I can't do it, Mer; I can't have another baby without losing myself, without compromising my sobriety or ruining everything I have; I can't do it." She leaned back against the cool ceramic of the bathtub, sighing heavily. "I have to tell him."

"You do. But, take some time to process it yourself, first. Go get some good sleep and think things through, make sure that you're completely sure of what you want, think through what you're going to tell him." The brunette nodded as her sister spoke, pushing herself off of the bathroom floor and wobbling slightly as she stood. "Maybe get some food in your body. You look like you're going to pass out." Amelia wrapped her arms over her stomach tightly. "Can I make you something?"

------------------------

"Hey, can you come inside for a minute?" Amelia muttered, pointing towards the living room behind her. "I need to talk to you." Link watched her with wide eyes, entering the house and dropping Scout's bag on the floor of the entryway, placing Scout in the pack-n-play in the room.

"What's going on?" Link asked, hesitantly sitting down on the couch across from her.

"I'm pregnant." He quickly flashed a toothy grin before shaking it away, matching the expression on her face. "And, I'm telling you because you have a right to know, but I'm not going to keep the baby."

"Do I not get a say in this?"

"It's my body. This baby would be inside of me for the next eight and a half months, and then I would be breastfeeding and recovering for god knows how long. Link," Amelia leaned forward, clasping her hands together, "I'm doing everything I can to stay sober and be a mother for Scout right now. And I'm telling you that I cannot continue to do that if I keep this baby." He pursed his lips and stared past her, nodding his head slowly as he processed and thought. Amelia watched his face as if she could see wheels turning inside of his brain. He ran a hand through his hair.

"When's the appointment?"

"A week from tomorrow," she muttered, pulling her sleeves down to cover her hands.

"Do you want me there? I can, I can drive you if you want me to hold your hand, or if you just need me to take Scout," he blinked quickly, finally meeting her eyes. "What can I do?"

"You're not upset with me?" Her eyes watered as Link moved to sit closer to her on the couch, placing his hand on her knee, his thumb rubbing soft patterns in comfort.

"No, of course not. I didn't understand why before; I thought you were just uncertain about it, but I don't want you to risk yourself or your health to have another baby, Amelia. So, so if getting an abortion is what you need to do, I'm on board." She brought her hand up to her mouth, biting at a hangnail on her finger as a tear fell from her eyes. "Why did you think I would be upset with you?"

"Things haven't been normal between us for months, and you want another kid so badly; I thought that you wouldn't love me if I didn't keep the baby," she whispered, tears falling freely from her eyes as she spoke. Link reached up and brought her hand away from her mouth, wiping her cheeks with his sleeve and holding her hand in his.

"Is it okay if I hug you?" He paused, waiting until she nodded to wrap his arms around her tightly, her head settling on his chest with a content sigh escaping his mouth. "Amelia, I love you no matter what; I don't need another baby to know that I love you and want to be with you," he kissed the top of her head. "I'm here. I will always be here."

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"Okay, heating pad, blanket, and that disgusting ice cream you love," Link whispered, handing her a carton and a spoon. Amelia smiled at him from the couch and took the lid off of the ice cream, digging her spoon in and scooping a large amount into her mouth, her eyes rolling back in enjoyment.

"Mm," she moaned, "this is the best thing ever." He shook his head in amusement.

"Can I get you anything else?"

"Sit with me?" He nodded, kicking off his shoes and sitting on the couch, gently pulling her towards him. She cringed at his touch.

"Still cramping?"

"Crampy and crappy," she muttered, spooning more ice cream into her mouth. "But sober and alive. And, I'm grateful for that."

"So am I," he whispered, placing his head on her shoulder and leaning it against her head. "Thank you for telling me why you didn't want another kid. And, I'm sorry for making you think I would be upset with you." Amelia sniffled and laid her head back.

"Thank you for being here, for putting everything aside."

"Hey, don't cry," Link laughed softly, bringing his arm around to wipe her eyes.

"My body's still trying to get rid of the hormones," she muttered, blinking away tears in her eyes that were wiped away by Link as soon as they fell down her face. "You're really comforting, even when you're mad at me."

"I'm not mad at you; I just think that we got so caught up in our lives that we forgot to be us. I forgot to check-in, and I'm pissed as hell at myself for doing that." He wiped away more tears from her eyes.

"Can we have this conversation sometime when my body isn't overwhelmed with hormones?" Link nodded and laughed gently, kissing the side of her head and adjusting his body so that she could lean back. "I'm not-I'm not just magically better now; I still need to work things through, and I need you to know that."

"I know. And whatever I can do, whether it's driving you to meetings or giving you space, just tell me. I love you, Amelia, and I want to work through this."

"I love you, too," she responded softly, shifting to lay against his body.

"Get some rest," he whispered, pulling a blanket over her body. "I'll be right here when you wake up."