#I’m also really mad about a bag I bought at the charity shop

[justgracedrawsart]

Recently been playing the Life is Strange games, rn I’m playing Before the Storm . I might draw something regarding that.

I also experimented with a different style with this one because I think type-casting yourself to one style is boring

[everymovie2020]

Indecent Proposal (1993)

Date watched: 12 October 2019

Continuing with the 2019 Demi-athon.  This is a movie I haven't seen since the 90s.  I'm pretty sure the one and only time I watched it was on TV one night with my mum, and I remember being bummed out about it at the time.  I also distinctly remembered a sex scene between Demi Moore and Robert Redford that I must have imagined, because there's no sex scene between them in this movie.

I'm also going to preface this by saying that I thought literally every single character in this movie was an asshole. If this was r/AmItheAsshole? and it was any one of them asking the question, the answer to all of them would've been yes.  You're the asshole.

Plot:

Woody Harrelson and Demi Moore are a stupidly happy, ridiculously in love, super supportive couple who are trying to get their lives on track.  I would say they are late 20s/early 30s and they have been together since high school. He's an architect and she's a real estate agent.  She's also growing out her hair in this movie, so she has a cute little bob which looks great.

They want to build their dream house, so they buy a block of land on the beach in Santa Monica and mortgage the shit out of it. They're halfway through building when there's a recession, he loses his job and now they don't have money to complete the build, and they're about to lose the land and possibly their own house altogether.

So he did what anyone in that situation would do, which was to suggest they go to Vegas and win all the money.  She goes along with it because she supports him no matter what.

It's at this point that I would like to discuss her handbag, because I've never seen anything like it.  I will try to find a picture, but basically it's a slouchy backpack, and instead of the pack being at the back, there are two packs on either side of her hips.  So it has two armholes that she puts her arms through, and then the purse part is at her hips, and it's all connected as one big bag structure.  It's the weirdest thing I've ever seen, and I have to imagine that it would be super easy for pickpockets to steal your shit out of.

I found a picture!

Is that not the weirdest thing ever?

Anyway, back to the plot of the movie.  On their first day in Vegas they win like $25,000.00 and she meets Robert Redford in a fancy shop, where he offers to buy her a black dress.  She says no because she can't be bought (spoiler alert, she totally CAN be bought). They decide to go back the next day to double their money and of course they lose it all, completely.

It's at that point that Robert Redford meets up with them and they get to talking, he upgrades their suite and buys her the dress, and they're like, wow, this super rich dude is paying attention to us, that's really weird.  He then invites them to this fancy rich person party and she wears the dress (and looks incredible).

At the party, over pool, he makes the offer – one million dollars for a night with Demi.  They both laugh it off, but he's serious, and then they're like, "Well, we could really use the money."

So here's the thing – they both talk it out, they agree that it's one night, it's just sex (they've both slept with other people as well, so it's not like they've only ever been with each other), and she was willing to do it for them so they could buy their block of land and finish building their house, and get themselves out of debt.

Woody is fine with it, and she goes off to do the deed with Robert Redford, and then Oliver Platt is like, "Fuck, you're a stronger man than I am, what if he runs off with her, what if they fall in love," and instills a lot of doubt in Woody, and so he tries to stop it from happening but it's too late.

And at this point I'm going to say that I think what Robert Redford has done is really, really fucking terrible and gross and he should be ashamed of himself.  To dangle something like that in front of them, which then throws their lives into chaos and almost leads them to divorce, and then to act totally blameless about it, is total rich person bullshit.  He's a fucking sociopath.  He wanted to fuck Demi Moore, he knew they were in debt and so he came up with a way to get her to do what he wanted her to do.  It's gross.  He's gross.

So she goes off him with Robert Redford to his boat, they do the deed and in the morning she's returned to Woody, who is just a mess at this point.  And then they go home and try to pick up the pieces, but here's the other thing the prick has done – he's bought their block of land in Santa Monica, because they were late on the payment.

Again, the reason they agreed to do this in the first place was to save that block of land.  He knew that.  He bought it anyway, and acted like they did him a favour.  He's a monster.  He's an actual monster.

Now they've done it for nothing, they've got all of this money but not the block of land, and their marriage is in the pits. She moves out and starts dating Robert Redford (honestly, for all her talk about how she can't be bought – she's bought very, very fucking easily, let me tell you) and Woody just bums around feeling sorry for himself.

She files for divorce, planning to move in with Robert Redford, and then Woody turns up at this zoo animal auction they're at (for charity) being hosted by Billy Connolly (random!), and he bids a million dollars on a hippo because it means something to their relationship. And then he sits down with her and signs the papers, tells her he loves her but he's setting her free.

And she thankfully dumps Robert Redford and goes back to him.  Robert Redford, in the one nice thing he does in this movie, actually forces her hand on that, by telling her that she's not the first woman he's made the offer to, even though that's a lie.

Because you know what, Robert Redford?  Instead of testing people with a million dollars and treating them like pawns in your little billionaire game, you could actually stand to meet a woman the old-fashioned way (i.e. by not offering her money) and maybe try dating rather that just straight-up manipulation.

Honestly, these fucking people made me so mad.  You can't even feel sorry for Woody Harrelson because he's the one who decided to gamble their fucking money away! Gambling is not a get rich quick scheme, you idiots!  And Demi just cuts and runs when things get hard, they don't even try therapy – she just leaves.  What the fucking fuck.

These people are assholes and they all deserve each other.

[tumblunni]

Hhhh bunni legs pain accomplishment day

I HAVE FINISHED THE SHOPPING OF HELL

Tfw u only get paid 4 days before christmas and have to rush everything aaaa

It was bad enough today so i'm so glad i got it done before it got even more busy!

Misc boring essentials i bought for myself: new phone charger cos broken, new trousers cos i spilt hair bleach on my only two pairs, new shoes cos my left shoe literally snapped in half down the middle like wtf even happened there, cheap pink hair dye from a discount store cos i wanna try different colours but in a thrifty way

Now for EXCITING CHRISTMAS PRESENT TIME!!!!

First off SO MANY pc and xbox 360 games from Every Charity Shop In Cardiff, St Mellons, Rumney and Llanrumney. My sis has been trying to find some games to play but was like 'dont worry about it i can just wait til the charity shop gets something good'. So i thought i'd get some stocking stuffers via all the charity shops on my side of town. By our powers combined we will blitz the entire vale of glamorgan's discount gaming scene!!! I found SO MANY good stuff for £1/£2/£3 like holy shit i love when charity shops dont know the proper price for shit XD

speaking of which i also found a WEBCAM for £2! If its that cheap it probanly isnt great but itd still be fun to play around with! :D and the same store also had an old vintage G1 My Little Pony coffee mug in excellent condition. Oh god the nostalgia! My support worker gave me a lift to llanrumney so i had to awkwardly explain why i had an armful of weird 80s mugs and big teary eyes!

Speaking of vintage, i found this new vintage toys and games shop in cardiff called Galactic Attic! The name hooked me in and then they actually DID have pokemon inside! As well as all sorts of stuff ranging from 40s to 90s, wow! There was even a lil pile of old 90s gaming magazines in the corner, covered up by a bunch of boxes. I'm glad i noticed them! I got the announcemt issues for pokemon diamond pearl and platinum in a weird old pokemon fan magazine that i loved as a kid. Im kinda sad that nowadays we just have one official magazine fpr each console and not the wild madness of amateaur journalists failing horribly to get news from japan. Shame they didnt have Beckett Pokemon cos that one was infamous fot drawing its own terrible interpretations of pokemon sprites to avoid copyright. And speaking of terrible, they even had bootleg pokemon!! I talked to the cashier and he was like "you know those are fake right" and i was like "yeah its so nostalgic thats why i want em" and he was like "lol yeah they actually sell pretty well so i'm not mad my supplier ripped me off". It was a pretty good and awesomely terrible fake at the same time? There was this exact replica of some japanese display stand for the product and then the actual pokeball toys looked perfect BUT the mini pokemon inside were.. Really not. I am so damn happy with the surprise inside my one, surprise inside has never been more accurate! I can't take a picture now cos my phone is charging but REGICHEETO. Just..just imagine that, and whatever you're imagining it is probably worse. I love it so fuckin much. Also less hilariously there were some bootleg mini pika plushies with actually (as far as i can tell) their own unique design? They have cute lil winter scarves and an art style that reminds me of the Magical Pokemon Adventure manga. A really cute and good bootleg that i would have loved to see as a real product! The only way you can even tell its a bootleg is because there's no marking on the tail. I dunno, maybe if i still have some brown fabric in the cupboard i could fix it? Or maybe its unique tail makes it even more special! I mean there's Cosplay Pikachu with its double tail marking so maybe this is her cousin Accessory Pikachu with no markings? He just likes wearing scarfs and hats and stuff. OMG HE'S THE POKEMON GO EVENT PIKACHU!!!!!!

Along the miscness of finding a few things for myself, i also found: cute lil pokemon pencilcase, kingdom hearts blind bag, cheap copy of Fruits Basket volume 1 cos the new remake is coming out soon and i wanna Get Hype! The KH blind bag was really weird cos i didnt know they now have an entirely different set as well as the keychains i bought before. Its kind of a shame the art style doesnt match cos vexen is only in the keychains, alas! But i do really love these ones! Theyre apparantly made by funko pop but dont have the art style AT ALL, they just look like really accurate versions of the characters in mini form. Its kinda like the 'distance animation' style in steven universe? (Incidentally they also do SU ones but they missed the opportunitu to actually use the distance style, lol) I got a Sora in his kh2 outfit and i'm decently happy with that, its not one i really wanted but its not a bad one either. But i think now i've tried the fun of surprise once i'll just buy the actual ones i want off ebay later. They have roxas in his organization outfit! With a happy smile!!!

Oh oh and then EVEN MORE XBOX GAMES OF THE WILD THRIFT STORE VOID! i managed to find the whole fable series, two assassins creeds, saints row, gta, some misc shooter games and racers that she wanted but i dont know much about, mass effect 2 and ff13. I think maybe one or two others cos i cant fully remember right now. Theyre all in separate bags strewn across the room and my shoulders feel like death so i'll sort through them later.

Aaaand i wrote up like 14 paragraphs more but tumblr didnt save my draft fpr some fuckin reason and now im way too tired to do it again

Briefer summary:

* had a huge horrible panic attack getting stuck in a skyscraper shopping centre clothes place full of screaming and every perfume smell and WHY DO I HAVE TO NAVIGATE THIS HELL MAZE TO FIND THE ESCALATOR and seriously i was my most primal animalistic self and i went full fight or flight on this bitch

* had a lovely time visiting Cool Shop Grandma and rambled the story of how i met her and how we became friends but hhh too tired to rewrite. But anyway today i gave her a christmas pikachu plush as thanks for everything and cos her shop is moving on to its next location soon. She got really teary and gave me a big hug! She's gonna be at a comic con in march so i hope i'm able to go to that and see her again.

* went on a wild goose chase looking for harry potter merchandise and eventually found a gold plated replica of the movie prop version of the time turner and HELL YES my sis will love it!

* rambled about several market stalls that were cool but i can make a separate post about that in the morning when i find their contact details to advertise them

* got a plushie delibird and decided to take selfies with it everywhere to try and fight my social anxiety somehow. We went to a neat lil restaurant and had cheesy fries and a coke float!

* asked for a refund on an item for the first time ever and im proud of myself

* went off on a mystery bus trip to buy a preowned 3ds and pokemon games from a lady in an online preowned stuff facebook group and it didnt go horribly and i am glad! She was really nice and i witnessed A Good And Smart Parenting Moment and man it healed my heart and i wish i'd been raised that way. Again i'll probably ramble about the details later when im less tired, it really touched my heart seriously! And now i have MANY GIFTS FOR SIS!

* in total i was out present shopping from 9am to 8pm and i clicked my shoulder out of its socket for a split second from.all the heavy bags. Now im in a lot of aches and i need a sleeps

The End

[dippedanddripped]

long leg, an almost 70s flare.” This was a sentence I wrote in my notebook back in January during the men’s AW19 fashion shows. These were the words of Clare Waight Keller, the designer at Givenchy who dressed Meghan Markle for her big day. The flare is part of a new era for menswear at the Parisian house, marking a distinct shift from the previous administration, where the brand had come to be defined by streetwear, and a sellout rottweiler-emblazoned sweatshirt. Flared trouser suits in strong red and a fabulous teal blue appeared on models walking through Givenchy’s couture salon in Paris. It all rippled with a breeze of expensive glamour. Waight Keller cited not just the 70s but the 90s as inspiration, another era with a strong flared trouser game, if you think of Britpop stars such as the mighty Jarvis Cocker.

Fast-forward a season, to the close of the SS20 men’s shows in June. I posted on Instagram an image from the Celine show by Hedi Slimane, captioned: “A flared Celine jean. That’s all, Paris.” Slimane’s model army strode the runway en masse for a finale rammed to the hilt with flared trouser hems, underlining the fact that the flares trend looks likely to have legs, as it were. I left this show with a head full of images of Yves Saint Laurent during the 70s, on a rooftop in Morocco. I was also more than a little obsessed with the idea of getting my legs into a pair of Hedi’s new jeans.

Between these two moments, Quentin Tarantino’s new film Once Upon A Time In Hollywood had premiered at Cannes. On screen, Leonardo DiCaprio wears, among other variations on this bottom-half theme, a pair of peachy-pink flared trousers. These were specifically created by costume designer and stylist Arianne Phillips. The trousers had already made tabloid headlines during filming last October. “Pink Pants-er” was a particularly choice pun.

So, with some serious style endorsements of the flare, is it time to quit your designer jogging pants and/or – finally – ditch those infamous skinny jeans? Probably. Donatella Versace, whose latest show featured flares in both house signature prints and black, wants you to strongly contemplate the notion. “Men, I think, are having way more fun than before, experimenting with new silhouettes, colours and prints, and the flare pants are part of that process of exploring one’s own personal style I have been doing for a few seasons,” she said.

Versace herself has often taken her end-of-show bow in a kick flare. She thinks a man in flares reeks of confidence. “The attitude I had in mind was, ‘I like it, so I wear it.’ Like everything else in a man’s wardrobe, whenever you change or introduce a new element, there are a lot of people who are sceptical. More than ever, though, we live in a world where people are encouraged to express themselves – be it through one’s own ideas or style. And I love it!”

Elisabeth Murray, fashion curator at the V&A in London, cites Tom Ford’s SS00 Gucci men’s collection as a significant flares moment, including “a particularly daring python pair”. She thinks the flare comeback is part cyclical, part a general interest in the 70s from designers. “Flares are a way to inject fun and frivolity into menswear,” she says, “which is something we’re seeing on the catwalk.”

With menswear dominated by streetwear and cult sneakers for a decade or so, the flare could be seen as part of a shift back to dressing up. Suiting has been reinvented again by the likes of Kim Jones at Dior and Virgil Abloh at Louis Vuitton – two designers who have often been seen as integral to “sports luxe”. The styling of suiting on runways isn’t about a Mad Men-style professionalism. Designs are cut away from the body and worn with wider trousers for a more louche and easy silhouette. Flares are part of a new wave of upscale chic – the opposite of the familiar body-conscious skinny jeans – crossed with, as Versace says, a new experimentation in men’s fashion.

Murray references noughties Gucci as a moment, and Gucci circa now is also key to the flare comeback. Designer Alessandro Michele has featured them in his menswear since 2016 and they are central to the retro maximalism that has become Gucci’s calling card. Michele wears them himself – as seen on the Met ball red carpet in May. This season, Gucci featured velvet suits with bell-bottoms, so the designer is not getting tired of the shape.

Other brands are also onboard. Balenciaga have been toying with boot-cut denim. Martine Rose – a British designer who loves a wide slack – has featured various flared styles for her label and Fendi’s trousers have also recently had a kick to their ankle. Plus the first men’s runway collection by Jonathan Anderson for Loewe – arriving in stores now – features a fantastic pink tuxedo styled with a pair of definitely-swingy-at-the-hem trousers.

Flares have a history that means almost infinite images to mine for inspiration. Sailors are thought to have been the first to adopt bell-bottom trousers in the 19th century, partly because they rolled up easily, while Oxford bags in the 20s saw the circumference of a hem reach over a metre. It was the late 60s when flares took off. By 1969, they were so popular that astronauts on Apollo 11 reportedly wore their spacesuit slacks with a flare. By the 70s, they were on Sonny & Cher’s TV show, the Studio 54 dancefloor, Abba at Eurovision, Slade, Earth, Wind & Fire. Even footballers wore them as part of suits off-pitch circa 1977. Naturally, as all fashions do, they peaked by the end of the decade, replaced by the drainpipes – proto-skinny jeans – favoured by punks. Flares would not return until the 90s, once again associated with music, from Britpop to grunge and rave.

Phillips says the clothes DiCaprio wears are representative of various changes happening in 1969 in politics, Hollywood and fashion. His character, Rick Dalton, a 50s TV cowboy actor, is, Phillips says, trying to be considered relevant in this new era. “He has many costume changes in this film, one of which is the sherbet peachy-pink flares worn when we see Rick making an effort to keep up with the changing times.”

But what do flares semaphore in 2019? Ben Cobb, editor-in-chief of Another Man (and street style favourite), is a poster boy for the flared look and has been wearing the style since he was 17, when he picked up a pair of 70s flared jeans. He now says he has pairs for all eventualities, including velvet tuxedos, bespoke suits and cords. “There is a feeling of elegance and glamour returning to fashion, and flares in menswear are a great symbol of that,” Cobb says. “They evoke freedom and flamboyance.”

There is little doubt that flares are inherently something of a statement – from John Travolta strutting down the street in the opening sequence of Saturday Night Fever, to Jarvis Cocker in charity shop flares, doing his best lounge singer impression in the video to Pulp’s Babies. Sometimes campy fun, sometimes countercultural and free-spirited. I recall dressing up Jarvis-style (plus hair curtains) to see bands or go to raves in the 90s and am quite sure I considered this a kind of grungy-alternative decision. Luke Leitch, a critic for American Vogue, who recalls having flared cords in the 70s as a child and boot-cut jeans in the early 90s, argues that “they transmit that he [the wearer] isn’t afraid to sail against the prevailing winds of taste. And there’s something about flares, when worn with panache, that seems appealingly sleazy.” While they are yet to reach the high street in earnest, vintage styles are a good way to shop the trend for autumn – and bring a bit of a 90s feel to proceedings.

Flares are also often associated with the kind of sexually topsy-turvy and androgynous styling of the likes of Robert Plant, Marc Bolan, Mick Jagger, George Harrison, Jimi Hendrix and David Bowie – all musicians Phillips says were inspiration to her when she started her career dressing Lenny Kravitz in the late 80s. “In the early days when we had no money, I would dress him in women’s flares I found at garage sales or flea markets, which had the perfect proportion for him.”

A few seasons ago, as trousers seemed to be getting wider, I bought a pair of black Dries Van Noten kicky flares. As soon as I put them on, something shifted in the way I stood; I felt leaner, a little sassier perhaps, so I reach for them when I’m looking for an extra slash of dressiness. I’ve worn them to the opera in Paris and the ballet in London. Friends have noted they “add a certain swish” to an outfit. “It’s a really sexy shape,” Cobb confirms. “But the fit is essential: it has to be tight on top and sweep out from the knee. They lengthen the leg and make the bum look great.”

Mark Weston, creative director at Dunhill, has since SS19 been experimenting with a split-hem trouser that gives off the idea of an elongated flared silhouette. He says, “I think this is happening as a reaction to the saturation of sportswear and a rejection of skintight jeans. There’s a desire for clothes that combine utility and elegance with a sense of ease.”

Weston says if you’re planning to experiment with this current trouser proposition, you should “wear it slouchy and comfortable – never uptight”. He adds: “Proportionally, the leg will look longer. So the top half should have either a slightly oversized proportion, whether a great T-shirt or peacoat, or a long and lean Chesterfield coat, to balance it out.”

I ask Versace how to wear it. “You know me, I don’t do things half-heartedly,” she laughs. “You either go with it or you don’t. For the less brave, I’d suggest trying them with a suit jacket and chunky sneakers.” Cobb agrees flares work best when they are making a statement. “Go big. Anything less is just a boot-cut.” Francesco Risso at Marni concurs – this season he offers a flared hem in a bold leopard print.

As for the attitude to channel while wearing flares in 2019, the last word goes to Givenchy’s Waight Keller. She coined the phrase “perverse poshness” to describe her menswear designs for the house. This, she argues, is about “looking refined but not really caring about it. There’s something very elegant about that.”

[amphtaminedreams]

Sustainability for Beginners: Lookbook no.2

Hi to anyone who’s reading!

From the title, you can probably get an idea of what this little excerpt will be about. Fast fashion, its impact on the environment and its exploitation of workers in developing countries is a topic that has been brought to the forefront of online debate, and for good reason; most clothes that end up in landfills take over 200 years or more to decompose and garment production is one of the most significant pollutants of the planet. 80% of garment manufacturers in developing countries are women, 60% are under 18 and basic workplace expectations as we know them are non-existent: minimum wages, health and safety regulations and workers’ rights are severely lacking.

That being said (and this is a very first world struggle), making the transition from being blissfully unaware, or rather, wilfully ignorant of the damage caused by fast fashion when it is something you’ve mindlessly indulged in for years to partaking in it with a critical eye can be quite difficult. The reality is that whilst some high street retailers have a slightly better reputation than others, most do continue to outsource their production to countries with looser regulations such as Indonesia, Morocco and India in order to keep profits up. To stay away from fast fashion completely requires redirecting your attention away from the high street (online “budget” fast fashion retailers included) and towards independent, sustainable boutiques, second hand stores and charity shops. For a lot of people, this isn’t something that can be done overnight, similar to making the change to veganism or vegetarianism. Habit is a hard thing to conquer; I think a lot of people will relate to using binge eating as a means of instant gratification. In a similar vein, if binge shopping isn’t a term, I want to make it one, because I think it’s just as much of a high. Many a night has been spent giving in to poor impulse control and making a serious online shopping order. At least it’s not hurting myself, I’d think, not sparing a thought to the harm fast fashion does to others and our planet. We all have the need to consume so deeply ingrained into us that I think we develop a kind of blind spot with regards to the suffering it can cause; it’s a bit of an out of sight, out of mind situation.

There’s definitely a class dynamic to the fast fashion discussion too. It’s not realistic for everyone to purchase from sustainable brands, nor do they have the time to trawl charity shops for whatever’s “on trend”. A lot of people do also depend on high street retailers for their jobs. I think the ideal scenario would be that retailers start to realise how much consumers care about issues such as sustainability and workers’ rights, and make changes accordingly. Their intentions may be to keep us coming back, but if they are willing to treat workers more fairly, and we as consumers are willing to be more mindful of what we’re throwing out, that would already be a drastic improvement. 

So what’s the point of this post? What am I actually suggesting we do?

Well, if you can stop buying into fast fashion on the spot, great. But honestly, it would be naive to say this is achievable for the majority. Controversial, but I don’t think that the fashion industry as a whole needs to be crushed. I love everything about fashion. It sounds a little dramatic but I do think of it as an art form and one of the greatest outlets of self-expression. IMO, it comes down to, on a microlevel, being conscious of what we do with our clothes once we’ve bought them (check if your local charity shop actually needs clothes before lumping them with several bin bags of your stuff! It could easily end up in a landfill! Don’t throw stuff out! Use Depop! Swap clothes with friends!), but more importantly, letting retailers know that we do care about environmental and workers’ issues. The biggest way to do this? Speaking out, but more importantly, reducing their profit and thus reducing our consumption. The speaking out part of the equation is pretty self-explanatory. There was recently a petition going round, for example, to pressure H&M into following through on their promise to ensure a living wage for all their workers (had around 150,000 of 250,000 signatures when I signed it so it was doing pretty well, though I need to follow up on what became of it). Research the tragedies of fast fashion, the Rana Plaza collapse of 2013 being a pretty well known one, and keep it in circulation. 

With regards to reducing our consumption, personally, I’ve made an agreement with myself not to buy any new clothes until October. I recently went on a bit of a mad one, lol, and bought way too much from Motel Rocks and Pretty Little Thing, and so I intend not to buy anything else (unless it’s second hand) for 3 months. I’m generally pretty good at this; said shopping spree was my first since January. In the meantime, I want to look into sustainable but affordable brands for when I do next go shopping again (my friend recommended Nobody’s Child to me! I had no idea they were a sustainable brand as they are so affordable! House of Sunny is another one I just made an order from and their clothes are beautiful!). Good on You is a really helpful app that I recently downloaded that gives clothing stores ratings based on how ethical they are; they take multiple factors into account including how a brand treats its workers, its carbon footprint, and whether animals are harmed in the production of any of its garments. Until October, if I do feel like going shopping, I’m going to stick to Depop (which is super easy to browse and convenient to use), Ebay, and vintage/charity shops. Charity shops are definitely the more affordable option but most metropolitan cities do have areas dedicated to vintage shops and fashion and most will have a range of garments to suit all budgets. Of course London has Brick Lane’s Vintage Market and Camden Market, but I recently visited friends in Sheffield and Bristol which also both have areas known for a wide range of vintage shops all in close proximity. Ask the people you know for suggestions, as they’re likely going to be the best points of reference. Fuck Google, lol. 

Most importantly though, USE WHAT YOU HAVE, and this is the point that ties into this whole post. See, I challenged myself to come up with at least 10 new looks without any new clothes and clearly went a bit overboard, as I ended up with 18. There’s no neon, bodycon, or biker shorts, soz, so they aren’t necessarily the most “trendy” but I do feel they reflect my personal style in way that’s current. Layering is your best friend and simple touches like a belt or a piece of jewellery can bring something up to date if it’s been neglected for a year or so. I’m not gonna lie, I do intend to do a lookbook including some of the new clothes I got the other week (like I said, they’re the first lot of clothes I’ve bought since January, give me a break!), but I wanted to affirm to myself that I can do it without buying anything new as well and that I’ve got more than enough to last me until October. THE FACT THAT OUTFIT RECYCLING IS SOMETHING THAT EVEN HAS A FUCKING NAME, LET ALONE IS SUPPOSEDLY LOOKED DOWN UPON IS RIDICULOUS. Good fashion is timeless, you don’t need whatever ugly trend consumerism is trying to convince you is the peak of haute couture to make a statement, lol. 

So to finish off my ramble, here is the 18 outfits I put together from my already owned clothes. I’ve labelled where things are from just to fill the empty space, but I’m now realising it was a bit of redundant effort as it’s not like any of the things are available. Creating unnecessary tasks for myself: A Saga. Anyways, I intend to put a couple of pieces on my Depop over the next couple of days (@lozpez), so if you read all the way to the end and like anything, keep an eye out. And also thanks for reading!

Lauren x

DISCLAIMER: Background in the first 2 images are mine. 9 below are not. 3rd is a Malcom T.Liepke portrait sourced from Google, 4th is Alphonse Mucha! I’m not sure about the rest but if anybody happens to be reading this and does know, hmu!

[cienie-isengardu]

Small update

Right now I’m visiting sister who live in England. What means all my projects & analysis have to wait (at least) one more week. Idleness kind of drives me to madness; so many things I have planned to do before the trip and now nothing can be done cause I don’t have needed sources with me. The charm of leaving home, I guess. What’s worse, I’m also babysitting two very young nephews, when sister and her husband are at work or have urgent matters to deal with. Yeah, and do you know how much I love being around kids? Hint: not much. For some unknown reasons, they seem to like me, so everything is more or less okay. I even survived kids party! To be honest, being around so many children made me totally glad I don’t have any on my own. Thanks godness! Having two nephews (2 & 5 years old) is enough. Really.

The evenings, when kids are sleeping, are the nicest moments. Me, my sister and her husband usually watch movie or two, so I’m finally catching up with “recent” action / superhero movies, including Fantastic Four, Terminator: Genisys, Captain America: Civil War, Star Trek Beyond & Deadpool. Still we have to see X-Men Apocalypse & Warcraft. Good thing I have people to watch them with me, otherwise I wouldn’t have motivation for doing so.

The two most selfish positive things about the whole “family vacation“ is 1) being far, far away from my workplace AND 2) hunting for interesting stuff. There is enough second-hand / charity shops or “everything for 1£” to find something pretty nice. For now I bought:

Star Wars: The Bounty Hunter Code

Daken: Dark Wolverine (”Big Break“)

Marvel’s Civil War

Batman: Court of Owls

Batman Annual 1991

Alpha Flight #28 & #34

Clone Wars (2003) volume I

Clone Wars Adventures comics #1, #4 & #7

X-Men Ultimate Guide (third edition)

The World according to Wolverine (2014)

Saddly, my bag is not enough big to pack everything. For sure BHC (even though I’m not a big fan of Death Watch Manifesto, but that is talk for other times) & Daken & The World according to Wolverine are coming with me. And I still have almost a week more to hunt for  interesting stuff for my little collection. Yay!

[maryannemagnolia-blog]

Report of a trip to Japan, September 2016, Buck-Tick related parts

Conversations with Japanese fans, BT cafe, Climax Together 3rd. I know it’s very late. I just want to post something and practice my English. My memories could be wrong.

Osaka, Yousukou Ramen

That small restaurant The Mortal members have been to in 2015. It’s hidden deeply in the streets of Umeda, difficult to find even with the help of Google Map, it was smaller than I thought it to be, there were only about 10 seats, and I wouldn’t say it was very clean inside.

The Ramen was very delicious, I was satisfied with its taste, but one bowl was not enough to fill my stomach at 3pm. Due to nervousness, I didn’t say Acchan-chan’s name.

(On that morning, I had much trouble finding a store called Umeda Loft, then the next day I had much trouble finding the live house Umeda Club Quattro, I guess the Feng Shui of that place does not suit my birth time.)

Tokyo, a hotel

I talked to the staffs of the hotel I lived in. One 20 or 30-something staff knew BT, when another staff who looked around the same age as him asked “What’s that?”, he answered “Old Visual Kei”, then praised my taste in music, “very good, very good. It’s rare (to see girls like me coming to Japan for bands like BT, I guess that’s his meaning)”

Tower Records Kinshicho

The Tower Records famous for a whole shelf of BT stuffs. It’s one the 4th floor (or maybe 3th or 5th I don’t quite remember) of a shopping center which is not faraway from the JR line station. If you want to buy BT’s CDs in Tokyo, I suggest you either go there or Tower Records Shibuya.

At the shrine of Morioka Ken, the boards had not been as full as they were in Cayce’s photos.

Sadly I didn’t have enough money to buy everything, I already bought many records in Osaka and Kyoto, so I only bought Mona Lisa Overdrive, Sabbat, Minus(-)’s D and the only one Togawa Jun album there (in the J-pop section).

Tower Records Cafe in Harajuku

On September 10th, I went to the Tower Records Cafe. I know there would be many people since the next day we shall Climax Together, but I didn’t realize I had to wait for two hours out on the street, but thank for the line of ladies dressed in black I didn’t get lost, okay several gentlemen were there, too, there were 40+ year old ladies in Visual Kei style outfits, 30-something ladies with elegant make up, in normal clothes, there were also JKs younger than me and 30-year-old men who looked just like any Japanese salarymen.

I talked to the nice looking lady behind me. She asked about the official translation of Buck-Tick in Chinese, it’s “花火師”, which means “pyrotechnist, it made her laugh so hard, and no, we rarely use that name.

I introduced her to Tumblr. She laughed again when I searched “Buck-Tick” on Tumblr, photos came out were Acchan, Acchan, and Acchan, “Nothing but Acchan!” Then she introduced Tumblr to her friends on LINE as a place to find many beautiful Acchan pictures.

She started another topic: “Do your parents love Japanese music, too?”

“My mom is Sakamoto Ryuichi-san’s fan.”

“She likes YMO?”

“She hates YMO.”

“Oh, then does she like Buck-Tick?”

“Not really, the only BT songs she likes are Jupiter, Dress and Flame.”

“Anyway,” she said, “I’m glad BT’s songs are liked by Sakamoto-san’s fan.”

It seems Sakamoto Ryuichi and YMO are one rank higher in dignity than all those rock bands.

When I finally got into the Cafe, it’s long past lunch time, I was very hungry. Climax Together 1992 was played on the screen, I felt very difficult to eat my pasta which was not spicy at all despite what was written on their websites while the man I love was singing about despair, pain, madness and desire to die.

Later, friends reported that they waited for 4 whole hours outside the cafe on September 12th, so I’m the lucky one!

Bar Teranga in Ebisu

It’s the bar Imai mentioned in his blog, owned by his wife’s sister Akane, who is also an indie musician. It’s hidden in the streets of Ebisu, on the third floor of a building, with only one tiny signboard outside.

I went there for the evil purpose of examining whether she looked as cute as she was in photos, or it’s photoshop’s doing (I’m not evil enough to think about meeting or stalking BT members, I swear), but I didn’t see her, that night only the male staff Takizawa Ryo was there, he is an indie musician, in 2012, some fans got extremely angry (I’m not sure why) after they found that the BT charity bags were sold at his concerts...but it has already passed, Imai has explained in his blog, Cayce has posted on her blog, so I’ll stop here.

The bar was small, gothic style, there was a wall full of Jrockers’ signatures, including all members of BT, Aki from Sid, Motokatsu, someone from D’erlanger, someone from Merry, Sakurai Ao maybe, and so on, I said “someone” and “maybe” because I couldn’t decipher their signatures which were all so artistically written. Only Shirosaki Jin, the big fanboy and former NO.1 host wrote readable kanjis. I heard there was also one written by Die, of dir en grey, but failed to find it. Aside from signatures, they also used Jrock magazines and BT tour goods as decoration, you can find BT stuffs even in the toilet. The Sakurai Drops box is surprisingly small.

There were three customers when I entered the door, all about 40 years old, two ladies, one gentlemen. I sat down, ordered curry rice and beer in English, the two ladies said “Oh, foreigner?” Then, one of them said:

“But why this bar... Bakuchiku fan?”

“...Yes.” I answered.

They gave me a very warm welcome by screaming and shouting.

“Do you speak Japanese?”

“Only a little.”

“Yokohama Arena?” She tried to speak very slow.

“Yes, but my seat is terrible.”

“Whoo, you come to Japan for a concert!”

“Uh...I came for sightseeing.”

“But your main purpose is the concert, isn’t it?”

And yes.

We talked about BT, Visual Kei and Jpop. “It’s amazing that Japanese music has influence on other countries’ people.” they said. Later, they began talking about baseball, Johnny’s idol groups, and the coming Visual Japan Summit (finally I remember that name).

The curry rice was nice. One of the ladies drank so much High-ball but her face didn’t change a bit, I envy people like her.

I left before all three of them, “Good night! See you tomorrow in Yokohama.” The Japanese fans said.

(Small information:

There is a bar in Minatoku, Tokyo, owned by NAO (BY-SEXUAL) and BT’s former manager Kojima, the name is “Azabu Kyuuban”, or “Azabu NO.9” in English. Many Jrockers had been there, including members of BT, Glay, Plastic Tree, Golden Bomber, Kishidan, Nocturnal Bloodlust and so on. Some BT fans love to go there after the Budoukan show, so if you want to go there that day, too, remember to pre-order.)

Yokohama Arena

There are big “横浜アリーナ” and “Yokohama Arena” words written above an exit of the station, you can follow the ladies in black as well.

I arrived at Yokohama Arena at about 12:30 pm, there was a long, long goods line in the rain, even there were many staffs selling the goods and they were quick, I think I still waited for more than 1.5 hours outside, and when I finally got into the venue, I found there were still many people waiting in front of me. Aku no Hana 2015 remix was played, when Kiss Me Good-bye was over, National Media Boys came, so they must played it for more than once, friends who came later than me reported they heard another album there. I heard almost one Aku no Hana inside the venue, than my turn of buying goods finally came.

It was reported by Japanese fans if you came at 3 pm, you did not need to wait, so I guess at concerts if you don’t want the most popular goods such as Sakurai Drops or Acchan eye masks, it will be better if you don’t come very early.

After buying the goods, same with many fans, I walked to a nearby shopping center, spent two hours there. One oddity was that, when I went to the toilet in the shopping center, everyone waited there was BT fans, I can tell they were fans because all of them wore either BT T-shirts, or typical bangya clothes such as black lace dress and black high heel boots, one of them wore a Mr. Matsumoto guitar print scarf, that famous one with red hearts.

Then back to the venue, people had already lined up for entering. Passersby looked at us curiously.

Since everyone has already watched the WOWOW video, I’d better not say too much about the concert itself, so just a few things:

1. Chandeliers were beautiful.

2. Beside me was a middle aged man, he cried during Jupiter.

3. People clapped their hands during the intro of Dokudanjo, it’s a bit hard to learn.

4. I didn’t realize Imai played Passing Mountain then, feel ashamed.

5. Imai’s guitar was so loud (noisy) that I could barely hear Acchan talking, and it was because Imai’s guitar, not my poor Japanese, Japanese fans have reported same problem.

6. I think you already know that, but the spoken words in Dress are “早く、行かなくちゃ” (I have to go, now).

7. Acchan said: “It must be difficult to see from there, I’m sorry”, then turned the stage light to the stage side and 2nd floor seats, fans who were lit up all waved their hands, screamed in happiness to him. He is a very gentle person indeed.

This year I plan to visit Japan again.

I will go to Fujioka, Gunma to see Imai Shouten. But before that I need to learn more Japanese.

Oh, actually this Gunma-chan (with serious bear) is not the first Gunma-chan.

The original Gunma-chan is this:

[letsjamesbrigdenthings-blog]

Session 3

Session 3.

This was postponed initial due to Jason’s other work commitments. During the interviewing I discovered two major things one was peoples did not yet trust me and so their disclosures where samey and often dull. Two some of the interviews where too contravortial. Both these led to huge moral panic and questioning. Then I had the idea of The Procrastinarium a series of small interactive sideshows which open up an audiences creativity. I talked the idea through with Bella who had expressed a desire to work with me but not on Queen’s in Search of a Country.

Initially we thought big. After our Month travelling to Croatia, Norwich, Newcastle and Hull we met several artists and took part in various workshops. Two experiences that changed the way I understood my ideas where:

The Baltic exhibition of the artist Roddy Graham. http://www.balticmill.com/whats-on/rodney-graham I believe this interest came in the curation rather than the content. The Spaces in which his work occupied moved between invasive picture spaces to chilled out record listening areas. This and the breathed of his work excited me. There was also something in the way he showcased the everyday in big fascinating cinematic ways.

The other experience that changed things up was the workshop led by Stephen Mottram on The Logic of Movement.

I have been a fan of Mottram's work since he attended the Beveley Puppet Festival in 2008 with The Seed Carriers. His latest show The Parachute is my least favourite  of his work but its simplicity and beauty appealed to me greatly when we witnessed it at The Moving Parts Festival. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f-i8ReV5EU8 

The shift of audience perspective is what we need to procrastinate effectively.

The initial ideas which needed scaling down and working on were:

The Procrastinarium!

Picture blowing up!

Using phones, trace image. Place traced image under tracing projector. Re-trace enlarged image.

Shadow puppetry!

Using paper cut techniques, using floaty materials, using gels.

Mask!

Trans mask and Full mask using the work of Steve Gerrard, Mark Pitman and Le Coq. Masks have simple expressions. Play against the mask. Game of guess the mask by endowments.

Bunraku puppets!

Simple rag puppets/torch puppets. explore the techniques used by Stephen Mottram in Logic of Movement. Weight, tempo, breath, transference.

Black out poetry!

Use junk mail letters creatively. Use old text creatively.

Marionettes!

Weight/tempo.

Primitive portraits!

By Bella to entice.

Scrap instruments.

A sound sculpture using pipes tuned to complimentary keys. Using gamelan techniques.

We told Jason and Ellie about this project they where very excited. Then we told the module leader and we were told it was not possible. Perhaps the ideas where too big. Perhaps the ideas where not heard fully. Regardless we where told by the module leader to work in a black box space. So we decided to do a play. Again it focussed on our over arching theme of home. Dislocation and home.

Here is the script:

Anne to camera.

It was cold. I was lost. I was cheery. My mother put me in a bluey green dress.

It was plain not patterned It brought light into my eyes. She said I must wait. I didn’t know what for.

Perhaps until it was good again.

She said I was beautiful and that I danced across her dreams every night. She said it was wrong. She said she should keep me safe in sleep not the other way round.

I was scared of the dark but it crept in. She tried to keep me away from it the best she could. Her feet where tangled. She stopped being. She was not near. I stopped being before the music started.

George: There’s a load of crap in these bags. Where do... What even is this? Ann: It’s a hat pin George. George: A hat pin? Ann: Yes. A pin for a hat.

George: Well do we sell Hat pins?

Ann: Yes. George: It’s pretty I suppose. Ann: Put it with the earrings. George: How much shall I put it out for? Fifty p? Ann: No. It’s beautiful. You can’t put it out for fifty p. Do it for one fifty. George: One forty nine. It is a charity shop after all. Not a vintage boutique. Ann: You’re funny.

George: What do you mean? Ann: When it comes to pricing. You always knock a penny off. George: Its psychology. You’re more likely to buy... I dunno its some bollocks I read once. Ann: Lalalalaala George: What? Ann: LaALALALA

George: Cut it out. Ann: I won’t listen if you keep swearing. George: Bollocks int swearing Ann: Lalalalala George: Fuck on the other hand. Ann: Laalalalalalaal George: Alright I won’t. Why don’t you like swearing anyway? Ann: Elsie Never swore. Told me it was bad. George: Oh. Yeah my Gran was the same. Still I bet she swore when you weren’t listening. Ann: No. Never. I was always there you see. George: Always? Ann: Yes. George: Even on the loo?

Ann: No... Not often. George: I bet she spoke like an Irishman’s .... when you weren’t there. Ann: No. George: I bet she did. Ann: She wouldn’t. Her dad was a sailor. George: There you go. Or was he whiter than white too? Ann: No. She didn’t like her dad.

George: Same. Look at all this tat. Hey there’s some records here. The Picture of Dorian Gray read by Hurd Hatfield. Bobby and Betty go to the Moon. Olivia Newton John Physical workout shred........ David Whitfield...

Ann: Caramia. George: Yeah. Hell you’ve got good eyesight. Read that right through me. Ann: It was Elsie’s favourite. Put it on. George: No.

Ann: Put it on.

George: We’ve not got a record player.

Ann: On your phone then.

George: I’ve not got any data.

Ann: Use the Cafe s wifi next door. That’s what you use when you go to look at those dirty videos in the loo.

George: I don’t. Ann: You do.

George: I don’t... I am signed in though because I had to send an email to...You’ve not told Mrs Foziard about that have you?

Ann: Don’t be daft. To her I’m a puppet. Remember. She’d have a triple bypass if I started telling her what you get up to in the loos.

George: How do you know?

Ann: Because you always have a wet patch on your shirt where you’ve been trying to clean your... excrement off. Don’t worry its perfectly natural.

George: Well I can’t do it at the hostel. Ann: You’re avoiding the subject George. George: I’m just surprised at your sleuth. Ann: Put Caramia on by David Whitfield. George: Alright. How do you spell Caramia? Is it with a c or a k? Ann: It’s on the record. C.

George: Oh yeah. Here it is.

Caramia Ann: That’s it. I’m back there. George: Where? Ann: With Elsie. I was so happy. George: It’s not th... Ann: Shush. I’m listening. That’s the Manitoni orchestra.

George: I thought that was a soup. Ann: Manitoni. Not Minestrone. George: It was a joke. Ann: Shush. I love that choir. George: Sounds like Disney.

Ann: That’s the point. I was Elsie’s fairytale. Hey what’s happened? Why’s it stopped? George: Buffering. And. And.And we’re back. Eh cheer up. It’s back on. Ann: I miss her so much. George I never wanted her to go. I wanted to go with her. George: Did she make you?

Ann: Yes.

George: Did she make any other puppets? Ann: No. I don’t like that word. Elsie made me because she had to. She... got pregnant.

unmarried to a polish man. He was left over from the war. Her father went mad. Her mother understood. She met him whilst working at the YMCA. She never told me his name. Wouldn’t speak it. He left. Went back to Poland the day after she told him she was having his child. He didn’t believe her accused her of all... he wasn’t very nice. Perhaps he was scared. It didn’t matter Elsie was alone. Her mother persuaded her father to let her stay in the house as long as she gave up the child when it was born.

George: What did she do? Ann: Exactly that. She called the child Clive. George: Why aren’t you a boy?

Ann: She wanted to make me like him but it was too painful. When she was pregnant she thought she was having a girl. She thought if she had a girl then her father would find it harder to send it away.

George: Did she find him? Ann: No. Never looked. I was all she needed. She always said... George: So he’s still out there?

Ann: I don’t know. He never got in touch. She gave him away after a week. I think that was what hurt the most. Her mother was doing her best trying to persuade her dad to let her

keep him but he wasn’t having any of it. She stalled him for a week but that week was a limbo. Like waiting to be sold.

George: Don’t be daft you’ll be bought by a nice kid. You’ll go to a good home.

Ann: I’ll get discarded after a year or two. Elsie never treated me like a toy. I was her child. So a week after his birth a couple from Shropshire, friends of Elsie’s dad came and got him. Never spoke of again until after the father died. When Elsie gave Clive up her and her mum and dad moved up here. Practically straight away.

George: hmmm Ann: Get away from... Anyway about a month after Elsie made me. George: Did She have any other Boyfriends? Ann: No. George: What never? She wasn’t a lesbian was she? Ann: No. just didn’t want the trouble. George: She must have had urges. Ann: No.

George: How do you know?

Ann: She was with me all the time. She would have told me. She lived with her parents her dad died. Her mum carried on for a while after then it was just me and her. until about a year ago when her cousin Karen heard she was ill and then she started hovering round. She never liked Elsie much. I tried to tell her but she wouldn’t have any of it.

George: After her money?

Ann: Why else would she bother appearing. Still her sons moved Elsie’s bed downstairs for her. But Karen kept putting me back upstairs when Elsie wasn’t looking. My house was upstairs but Elsie wanted me to be with her.

George: What happened at the end?

Ann: Nothing really just age. She was ninety two. George: Crikey. Ann: Things just went down hill for her. She was fiercely independent. She was a teacher. George: I hate teachers. Self righteous little....

Ann: Not Elsie. You would have loved Elsie. She taught in a special needs school. She was always their favourite. She used to take me in with her but I was too shy to talk. But in her last year she stopped driving when her car failed it’s MOT and she stopped going out. She

had a couple of falls. It was all very civilised. There was no grand deathbed scene. The doctors told her not to go up stairs anymore and the house wasn’t suitable for a stairlift but she’d sneak up to talk to me every night. Then of course the neighbours who knew of Elise’s problems saw the lights on upstairs and called Karen to come over. Elsie of course denied going up the stairs but.... She could be tricky like that when she wanted to be.

George: I’ve got to....

Ann: Get off?

George: No. I would never wank after you told me that stuff. I mean I will eventually but not straight away. I’ll leave it an hour at least. I might try one in the bus station toilets or on the back seat..... Oh god I see what you mean. Yes I’ve got to get off home now. Well not home but the hostel yes I...

Ann: Can you kiss me? George: What?

Ann: Will you kiss me? George:......................... Where? Ann: Here. George: bue...eee.....errrr. I it might be a bit.... Ann: Fine. George:(Kisses on forehead and bolts out the door) Must... Ann: Get off now? George: Miss me bus....

Ann to camera.

Train rides to the seaside where always fun. Me and Mum in Kiss me Quick hats. Dipping our toes in the freezing cold Irish Sea. The donkey rides.

Sleeping on the way home. Ice cream dripping on me.

Ann: So your mum’s been married four times? Is that right?

George: Yeah. Every one of them a total... Ann: Have any of them died?

George: Not that I know of. They didn’t when they were with her. I thought the stress might have got Barry. He was hubby number two. He was with her when I was six. Right little terror I was. He was sweet really... Posh car. He had a big house an all. On Vicky Dock. He used to drive us round all over. Peugeot something... I’ve never been one for cars me. He had a good job too. Worked for council. Something big in housing. He sorted us a nice flat. We jumped the waiting list. He had a dog too.

Ann: What kind? George: Chow. Ann: Auf Wiedersen. George: No a Chow. Ann: I know, I’m only messing. George: How do you know about dog breeds? Ann: I live in a charity shop. There’s always books on looking after dogs. Never ones on

looking after people but always ones on dogs.

George: Dogs come first see. That’s part of the reason why my mum gave him the elbow. That and... well he wasn’t very bothered about the other.

Ann: What other? George: You know S.E.X.. Ann: Oh.

George: He lived with his mother til he was thirty five. I hope I don’t end up like that. No I’d have killed her by then. I’d make it look like it was an accident. She tripped on a butty and slipped out of the window. When his mother died he thought a dog would make him feel better then he got me mother and lumbered with me. My mother is a very loud and

very active shagger. Barry was well a bit limp and a bit of a lump. A limp lump. She was wasted on him he wanted a domestic godess and he got a nymphomaniac who just wanted a bigger council flat. She couldn’t even make toast on a grill.

Ann: What about your dad?

George: Dunno. I’ve never met him. I’ve heard so many things about him... He was in a band. He shot an old lady for a fiver to get a bag of chips. He was in the circus as a freak act and escaped met my mum in Taveners married her the next day and got captured back into the circus. He worked on pylons. He’s from Cleethorpes.

Ann: Don’t you want to find him?

George: Not if any of that stuff is true. Husband number three was called Cliff! He was a kid really. Started seeing my mum when he was 16. His mam was my mum’s, cousin’s best friend’s sister so it was sort of incest. He used to have his hair spiked up like... he hated me. I was only about seven years younger than him. He used to sit outside the flat for hours in his car. It was bright yellow. He played Agadoo on repeat really loud. I think he must have been on something. Perhaps he was remembering happier times... I felt sorry for him but he was a weirdo.

Ann: What happened to him? George: Well he was up a ladder on a church roof. And he fell. Ann: ouch.

George: He knackered his back. Tried to get compensation but the church accused him of trying to nick their lead. Apparently he didn’t have permission to be up there. He said he was putting it back after he found it dumped by the roadside.

Ann: Did your mum believe him? George: No. None of us did.

Ann: Good. Stealing is bad. I’m glad your mum left him over dishonesty.

George: Oh no she wasn’t bothered about that. His back meant he couldn’t give her the other...

Ann: S.E.X.?

George: Exactly. For four months so she started getting it off Derek. He’s her latest squeeze. He is the most boring bastard I have ever met. He’s an ugly...

Ann: George! Be mice and don’t swear.

George: He’s an ugly git as well. He wears the same vest everyday and sits around in his boxers picking out... I don’t know what, from in between his toes, whiskers and bum crack. He puts a little pile of dead skin and fluff on the arm of his chair.

Ann: Disgusting. George: I know. Apparently he’s magic at the other. Ann: S.E.X.?

George: Yes. I could hear them every night. He gets disability for his sciatica. If the DWP could hear what he does to my mother with his problem I bet they’d deem him fit for work. He kicked me out.

Ann: Why?

George: He says he’s spiritual. Supposed to be a shaman or something, calls himself Four Ferrets. He retrieves people’s souls. He’s got my mum well hooked into it. He believes I’m full of bad spirits. Possessed...

Ann: By what?

George: An owl. Apparently an owl’s energy is not compatible with a ferret’s. So I was kicked out.

Ann: Didn’t your mum stop him? George: No. Men come first. Ann: That’s awful. George: No it’s not. I went to live with my Gran. She was sick. Ann: Oh.

George: Sick cool. Not sick dying. I mean she ended up sick dying. But when I first moved in she was just sick cool.

Ann: Is that why you’re in the hostel?

George: Yeah. She died and all the family wanted to get through all her stuff and sell it and... I mean it was a rented place too so they had to do it quick like. I got a box of it. But she was sweet. Used to smoke in bed. It was like a jungle her bedroom. She thought by having plants all around her bed it would swap the air for oxygen so the smoking wouldn’t be bad for her. It didn’t work.

Ann: I’m sorry.

George: Me too. She was lovely. She always gave me toffees in golden wrappers as a child and I’d suck on them for hours. And she used to put sugar in my lemonade to make it fizz up over the surface. She was the best friend I ever had. I wish I’d moved in sooner. It was awful at the end. She was in a hospice. The relatives had already started sorting out her stuff so I was the only one with her when it happened. Within seconds she was cold and stiff and I was crying. They’re used to it in the hospice. They were very kind. They took me away and gave me a chocolate hob knob or was it a ginger nut? I can’t remember funny what stays

and what doesn’t. I thought I’d remember that biscuit forever. I do remember it had fluff on it though. Come out of the jar. The jar was sticky.

George: Ann? Ann: Yes George. George: I’ve got you something. Ann: Really?

George: A present. Ann: You hid it from me all day? George: Yeah. I couldn’t give you it in front of the customers. Or Mrs Foziard. Ann: You haven't stolen it have you? George: No. It was in a box of my Gran’s things. Do you want it? Ann: Yeah. George: I wrapped it up and everything. The wrapping paper I nicked though. Ann: George.

George: Just kidding. It’s recycled. It was this kids birthday in the hostel and he had some presents. Anyway I got the paper out of the bin. There’s a bit of a stain on it. I think it’s pizza grease. At first I thought it was that stuff they put on condoms... Spermicide. But I’m pretty sure they don’t make tomato flavoured johnnies yet.

Ann: Thanks. I can’t open it...Felt hands you see. George: Oh yeah... Didn’t think of that...crap...er what shall we do then?

Ann: You could open it? George: Oh yeah. Good idea..... See... Ann: It’s beautiful. George: Its a mandolin. An Ann sized mandolin. Ann: An Anndolin. George: It’s a music box too. Listen. I just wind it up. Like I wind you up and.... See. Ann: Its amazing George... You’re sure it’s not stolen? George: Yes. What do you...

Ann: I know. It’s just you...

George: I know. But I’ve changed. It was my gran’s. She used to have it on her sideboard. On a doily. Brought it back from Spain or somewhere. Her first holiday after my Grandad died. She met a waiter called Og. He had jet black hair and a carpet on his chest. I think he gave it to her on their last night. HA I still don’t know how she got the mandolin. Get it? Eh?

Ann: It’s not funny. George: Okay. Anyway I used to dance around for hours with it. I used to love the tune.

Hmm Hmmm hmmm hmm mmmm. Ann: Do you play any instruments? George: Not reall... Well guitar... a bit. Ann: There’s one over there. Play it. George: No.

Ann: Go on. George: I don’t. Ann: You just said you did. George: Well I did. But I don’t play in front of people. Ann: Do puppets count? George:..... I thought you didn’t like that term? Ann: When it suits. Just play it George. George: I just used to play at my gran’s when no one was in. She was practically deaf

anyway. Oh go on then. WHOLE WIDE WORLD Ann: Did you write it yourself? George: I wish... It’s simple enough. Ann: It’s beautifully simple. George: Ha... It’s Wreckless Eric. Ann: Who?

George: Just this singer from the... Seventies? It’s my mum’s favourite. She had it at all four of her weddings. First dance and everything. I thought If I played it to her she’d stop going off with wankers.

Ann: George George: Fooking piss. Ann: George! George: What?

Ann: Don’t swear.... Mustn’t... Shouldn’t swear theres no need. George: Sorry. It’s just... I like it. Ann: Like what? George: Swearing. Course.

Ann: It’s stupid.

George: It makes me feel... Try it.

Ann: No. I don’....

George: Go on. Just F. just once.

Ann: No.

George: You'll like it.

Ann: Well I don’t like it. If you swear again I won’t speak to you. In fact I’ll die... And stay dead.

George: You’re not alive anyway. You're just a puppet...

Ann: George. George: Or a doll. I forget wh.... Ann: George, I am.... I have never been so insulted in.... George: You want to get out more. Ann: Take it back George. You're really horrid when you want to be.

George: Look Ann I can just walk away. Anytime I like. Just cash up and walk out of this dump and never see you again. You couldn’t follow me.

Ann: I could.

George: How?

Ann: I wouldn’t want to after what you said to me. But I could if I wanted.

George: How? How could you follow me? You’ve got no legs. You're a flipping puppet.

Ann: George!... If I wanted to follow you I would persuade your mum to buy me and then I’d come home with you and you’d be stuck with me.

George: Persuade my mum to buy you? She wouldn’t buy you in a million Sundays. What

would she want with a grubby old doll? Ann: Fuck off... Go on... Fuck off. George: Ann! Ann: There we are you pushed me... I swore... Twice I swore. Fuck you George. George: Thrice. Feel good?

Ann: What? George: Feel good to swear? Ann: George I’m not talking to you. You hurtful bastard. George: Haha so that’s a yes then? Ann: I thought you weren't interested in a grubby old doll. George: No. I said my mum wouldn’t be. Not at thirty quid. Ann: Just... Go and... Go and... George: Go on do it.

Ann: Go and.... George: You really want to... Ann: Just go and shit on your mum’s face you twat, fuck, arse, willy. George: Twat, fuck, arse willy! That’s ace. Ann: What? George: I was just winding you up. Trying to get you to swear.

Ann: It worked you poo brain. George: Shithead. You enjoyed it though... Ann: Bastard. George: I love you Ann Ann: I love you too George. George: I wish...

Ann: What?

George: I wish I could buy you... I don’t ha

Ann: I know.

George: Mrs Foziard says that you'll have to be sold soon or they'll throw out your house and put you on the shelf with the bears. You'll be reduced to £7.99.

Ann: But why?

George: Don’t have the space. Capitalist tw...

Ann: George!

George: Twits.

Ann: But its a charity shop.

George: I know. I hoped you'd never get sold. Then we could carry on like this. Until, I could get enough money to buy you.

Ann: I want that too. I think Elise would want me to... Even if you do swear. George: I know. I’m saving up. Being proactive.

Ann: Are you?

George: Yeah. There’s a wishing fountain in town. And I know its unethical but I’ve been taking coins out. Problem is I got caught by this old bloke. He made me put it all back. At the moment I’ve got on pound ninety eight and a soggy sleeve.

Ann: Oh George. George: I could steal you. Ann: From a charity? George: I suppose... It wouldn’t be easy anyway. Stealing oranges is easy. But I’d look

funny charging down New Court Road with your house on my shoulders. Anyway there would be no space in the hostel.

Ann: You’ll be back with your mum soon.

George: Yeah. I don’t think Desmond would approve. Their flats on the sixteenth floor. The lift is broke. It’s always broke but this time its because kids have been shitting in it and its seeped through the gaps and got the cogs clogged up or something.

Ann: It wasn’t you was it? George: No. No I reckon it was Rasher.

Ann: Rasher?

George: Yeah. He was a proper disgusting kid at my school. We used to nick vodka together. Go Swig it by the river. His real name is Kieran Bailey... But everyone calls him rasher. Once when we were thirteen we’d gone to the river... my gran had run out of vodka cause we’d drank it the week before, his mam had drank all their booze so I’d nicked my gran’s Pernod. Trust me its fowl. Anyway when we where pleasantly sloshed Kieran who was as sexually frustrated as the next thirteen year old got an erection and decided to relieve it in the mud. It was low tide. So he’s like this. He’s going like this. Within about fifteen seconds he’s completely submerged. There’s all sorts in that mud. Leeches, prams, bodies...

Ann: Bodies?

George: Yeah Kristine Denby was trying to lose her virginity on the stoney bit near the edge when she saw this bone poking out the water and it turned out to be celtic or something and there was a chariot and stuff next to it. It was in all the papers. Anyway Kieran Bailey was covered and we couldn’t find anywhere to hose him down. We got worried he might catch something...

Ann: A fish?

George: No like hepaticas or syphilis. It was probably the Pernod talking. So we broke into this cemetery and using them things you put flowers in and the tap I got him cleaned. He

was caked in it though. I’m glad no one saw us they’d have thought there was an apocalypse.

Ann: But why was he called Rasher?

George: Oh yeah. Well when I got all the river gunk off him he had this rash that was in the shape of a baby dolphin. the next day at school it was all pussy and green. Like the algae had clung to his face.

Ann: Poor Rasher. George: Yeah. He’s tee-total now. I’d better...

Ann: Don’t go. Cup of tea? George: Ann. Firstly you know I don..

Ann: Drink tea or coffee or anything hot. I know. Just stay a little while longer. It’s cold and dark when you’re gone.

George: It’s nearly six o clock. If I don... Ann: I know you get locked out. ...Why don’t you stay? George: Here?

Ann: Yeah. I do. Every night. What’s wrong with it?

George: But... It’s a shop. I can’t just bed down behind the counter.

Ann: We could stay up and talk all night.

George: Aren’t you fed up of talking to me?

Ann: No... Not at all.

George: Ugeh I don’t know. It would be weird.

Ann: Why?

George: Look I have to stay at the hostel or they’ll get rid of my stuff give my room to someone else.

Ann: So. There’s stuff here. You hate that place.

George: Yeah but I can’t just live in a shop. It won’t always be like this. We will have somewhere of...

Ann: Our own one day. Yeah I know. But I’m so lonely here. I spent my whole life with Elsie everyday every night. We stayed up for hours and hours. These last eight weeks I’ve

had to... I don’t know how to be on my own.

George: That’s the problem. Ann: What? George: Being on my own is all I know how to do. Ann: But you’re lonely. George: Yes. I’m lonely. It could be worse. I’ve learnt how to be lonely. Ann: It couldn’t be worse. I can’t stand it. I’m going mad.

George: Why? Everyone says being lonely is bad but what is so bad about it? Is it the thought of loneliness? What is it?

Ann: Yes it’s the thought. Its more than that It’s a fear that I won’t see you or be able to talk again. You said you loved me.

George: I do. Ann: Well people who love each other shouldn’t be lonely. George: Maybe. But they often are.

Ann: Wh...

George: Circumstance. Look if I don’t go now...

Ann: Fine... I can’t lock you in.

George: Promise I’ll be back first thing.

Ann: Don’t you dare break that promise. George? Promise me things won’t always be like this. Promise it. Promise that we can...

George: I promise I will take you away from here. Ann: When? George: Soon. Ann: What date though?

George: I dunno. Soon. Ann: If you promise a date then you can’t break it. George: Fine... I’ll take you tomorrow.

Ann: How? you’ll never get the money for tomorrow. George: Then I’ll speak to Mrs Foziard. I’ll pay in instalments. Ann: Take me now. George: I thought I wasn’t to steal from charities. Ann: I know but I can’t bare it. Take me. George: I’d never get the house through the door. Plus there’s CCTV. Ann: They never check it.

George: No but they would if you disappeared. Look I promise I’ll speak to Mrs Foziard tomorrow. I love you good night Ann.

Ann: Good Night George.

Ann to Camera Falling is a funny feeling. A feeling that is unavoidable. I avoided falling for so long. Perhaps I’m due a fall again.

George: Ann! Annie? I’ve got it Ann. I sorted the money. I... Ann? Sarah: Hullo. George: Who are you? Sarah: Sarah. I’m new here. Isn’t it terrible?

George: What? Why’s that shelf all messed up I sorted it yesterday?

Sarah: We got robbed. Broken in.

George: Your kidding?

Sarah: They didn’t take much. Amateurs really couldn’t get the till open. Not that cash is kept on these premises. Just took a couple of books and toys. They smashed....

George: Did they take Ann?

Sarah: Ann? Who’s Ann? Do you mean Mrs Foziard? No she wasn't in. She's gone out the back having a flush, before the police arrive. What a day for my induction. I’m only doing it for my Duke of Edinburgh award. Is that why you work here?

George: Ann? Annie? She’s not here.

Sarah: Who?

George: Ann. She’s a frie.... a puppet.

Sarah: You where going to say friend. Weren't you? Ha. I never thought I’d meet someone who was friends with a puppet. That’s hilarious.

George: Look have you seen her? She lived in this house. Sarah: I can see working here will be a hoot.

George: Have you seen her? We where going away together today. Sarah: You're cracked. George: Ann. Sarah: Oh that?

George: Not that. Ann. it’s alright I’m here Where’s your mandolin? Ann speak to me. Sarah: She was squashed under the till. Mrs Foziard had to move her to open it. Mrs

Foziard said not to touch anything. Not until the police got here. You're tampering with evidence.

George: Ann whisper in my ear. Please let me know you're okay.

Sarah: No one locked the door last night. There was no glass. They left the keys in the door. They just opened it up. Where you the last in?

George: Oh god. I had to run for my bus. I must have forgot and now they’ve caved Annes head in I will never forgive myself.

Sarah: It’s just a puppet.

George: You will never understand... Anne I’ve.. I got the money. I learnt a song last night. Please, please speak to me. I’ll never swear again I promise. I’ll always love you. Listen. (Picks up guitar plays Cara mia)

Sarah: You're tampering with more evidence.You’ve lost it. If getting my Duke of Edinburgh wasn't vastly going to improve my life choices no way would I work with you. I’m going to get Mrs Foziard.

This was written after reading The Secret Life of Plays by Steve Waters and was heavily influenced by conversations Mariette and I had and chance meetings with people in ordinary places.  The twee elements are developed out of the frustration of not having a location. The endless frustration I felt living in rented accommodation.

We read the play with Jason.

It seemed to be an enormous task.

With Jason’s help we worked out what we wanted to achieve.

Art work about Home. Home is such an important construct.

Both Bella and I have a shared and not shared home history.

Creating our Home was an extremely important task.

It took planning and mistakes.

We are still not satisfied.      

Many people have less than us.

We are in a relatively lucky position.

During this meeting I came up with the idea of getting an audience to answer questions on home. I decided that wings attached to the booth would be the best way of executing this. I bashed out its form and structure. I decided chalk and black board would be the best way of creating this. I set Bella the task of making this come to life whilst I came up with questions.

[kintailscape]

The Muggle Ball

The Friends of the Arlington Public Library hosted a Muggle Ball last night, and more than a dozen DADA members were in attendance. There was trivia, a costume contest, hors d’oeuvres and desert, themed drinks, a jazz band, and raffle baskets.

I was blown away by how many people showed up at the event. The staff did an amazing job of decorating, from a photo wall with standees (including Edward Cullen in a Hufflepuff tie) to amazing center pieces.

My night started with an hour-long drive there (yay, rush hour traffic!) after which I managed to find one of the three nearby garages I had researched that morning at 1am. And my first surprise was finding that the garage charged $4 for the night instead of the $10 I thought. And it was only a block and a half away. So I got there exactly at 7pm.

After checking in, I, thankfully, ran into two of my friends, who had already snagged a table up front. One was wearing a dress I thought about buying for the event, so I’m glad I didn’t. She wore it beautifully, with matching bowtie and earrings as well! I dropped my coat, checked out the raffle items, and then worked on the scavenger hunt with two other friends.

Some questions were easy: Q. What are the names of the Marauders? My answer: James Potter, Sirius Black, Peter Pettigrew, and (the best!) Remus Lupin Some questions were hard: What was Ron’s second wand made of? My answer: Wood and a magical core (which is not, technically incorrect…) And some questions were confusing: What are the maiden names of Harry’s mother and aunt? My answer: Names PLURAL? Evans… Lily Evans and Petunia Evans… what do you mean by maiden names plural, it’s the same, because they’re sisters. By the end, I was going with funny, in hope of making someone laugh and earn bonus points. Question: What charm did Hermione use on her bag to allow it to hold so much? My answer: An expanding charm, so that it’s larger on the inside, just like the TARDIS!

We also had to take a selfie with a member of Dumbledore’s Army or the Order of the Phoenix. This was NOT an easy task for three Hufflepuffs to undertake! We made a pass around the venue and didn’t see any likely candidates to approach. I saw one person who had a potted plant and thought he might be Neville (but he turned out later to be a Hairy Potter), but he was engaged in discussions with his friends. We spotted a great Mad-eye Moody and had our phone out, about to make our request, when he turned and moved in to kiss Trelawney. We aborted immediately! Finally, we spotted a Luna. And she kindly posed for a photo. Though, afterward, we realized perhaps she wasn’t Luna after all, because her robes were Gryffindor, not Ravenclaw. Oh well. They still accepted it. In fact, they barely looked at our answers and awarded us each a free raffle ticket!

I bought 12 other raffle tickets from a staff member who said to me “you don’t look familiar to me.” Which is kind of an odd way to start a conversation, but there it was! She asked if I went to the Arlington library often and I said no, I’m from Fairfax. And she said “You came all the way from FAIRFAX?!” which, yes, is an hour away in rush hour traffic but only about 17 miles away. Not really a long journey, you know? She handed me a $5 off book sale coupon and told me that they had an AMAZING book sale coming up. “At the end of April?” I asked, having just seen it the night before on their website. She told me I had to check it out. I’m certain I will. $5 in free books is never something I’d turn down.

Not a lot of raffle items caught my eye (jewelry, spa treatments, and wine are not my thing). And the glass bowl for the center piece raffle items was empty, so I put a ticket in there; I figured that there are more than a handful of those on tables, so my odds of winning one was pretty good even if other people put tickets in there as well. Then I made the rounds and put tickets in for a few other items.

I ran into some more DADA friends as well, then sampled the food. There were a few nice vegetarian options. However, one of the servers told us something was vegetarian and it absolutely wasn’t (which we discovered after eating some of it, UGH!). Every so often, they would bring out a cart of something and people would swarm! When the cookies came out (that was apparently desert) I moved from line to line, trying to figure out which lines were actually being served. Finally, I got to a cart. “Chocolate chip!” a man said, and thrust a plate with a cookie at me. A woman next to me said “Sure, fine!” and grabbed it. The server tried again, and I took the cookie. I’m not opposed to chocolate chip, though chocolate isn’t my favorite. When I got back to the table, however, I discovered it was oatmeal raisin, my favorite! Another lovely surprise!

The jazz band was great, and a nice reference to the Fantastic Beasts era. And it was nice to be able to just relax and spend time with friends. It was also nice to be welcome at such an event The centerpiece at our table had Draco & Harry pop pens, and a number of us took photos of them, enjoying the Drarry-ness of it all. The table also had golden snitches, keys, and letters for Draco, Bill Weasley, Neville, and others. The DADA organizers and I only had a few handfuls of group cards on hand, so we decided to slip them into the centerpieces, so the winners would find them. And if one of us won a centerpiece, we decided we’d give the card to one of the cosplayers.

I completely fail at getting good photos, but the costumes were amazing. The winners were amazing, including a fur-covered Monster Book of Monsters (at a BOOK charity event! So clever!) and a couple’s costume of the Whomping Willow and the Flying Ford.

Then they gave out raffle prizes. I’ve had a pretty bad track record with raffles during the past decade or two, Wincon not withstanding. I was also checking a friend’s raffle tickets, as she had to leave early. I didn’t know what she put tickets in for, so I had to pay close attention to every item. Which is why it didn’t even register itself when a number in my ticket range was called. I checked and double-checked, not quite believing it. Then I grabbed the ticket and had to show it to them because I still wasn’t sure I had it right. LOL I won the doggie basket. My parents’ pup is going to be pretty happy! There’s also a nice Harry Potter ceramic mug set that I’ll enjoy for myself.

When it came time for the center pieces, someone came around and grabbed them off the tables. We said goodbye to ours and laughed to ourselves about the DADA cards we snuck into each one. Apparently, there were seven centerpieces, one for each book. As ours had a spider in it, we assumed ours was for Book 2 and felt silly for not realizing it was book-themed. They read off raffle winners, one by one. And, suddenly, they were calling out my number again. That very first ticket, the one I’d put in the centerpiece raffle bowl before anybody else at the whole event, had just been called! So I went up and claimed the centerpiece for Book 6. As I walked back to the table, I realized it was the one from our table! Everyone got a good laugh about my winning our centerpiece back. But then I had to give the DADA card to someone. I ended up giving it to the Whomping Willow & Flying Ford (so we get two potential members instead of just one).

I headed back to the parking garage without incident (apart from some rude comments made by drunk men in bars/cars I passed along the way). And when I got home, I took a closer look at the centerpiece items. It was so clever!

Here’s my best guess for the Book 6 items. Let me know if you have other ideas!

Harry & Draco pens- in honor of Harry’s growing obsession with Draco during this book

Jelly beans- Dumbledore-related? At first I thought it was Weasley Wizard Wheezes-related, but this is candy, not jokes

Felix Felicis- The potion brewed during this book

Candied pineapple- Slughorn’s favorite

Spider finger puppet- Aragog’s funeral

Hogwarts snow globe- Harry on his broom, the last time Harry plays Quidditch at Hogwarts

Gold coins- Erm… maybe the DA coins that they used to gather DA members when the Death Eaters attacked Hogwarts? Or maybe Ron visiting his brother’s shop and them charging him for items?

Lighting up wand- honoring Dumbledore

The Muggle Ball was originally published on The Fangirl Project