#I’m a trash possum

[themosthatedbeingg]

//

WHEN THE FUCK DID YOU ALL GET HERE?! SKDODODIDJDN

omg srsly tho…I can’t believe there’s this many of you that put up with me ?! Ahhhh I’m screaming I just I’m aahhh thank you all so much for enduring my random ass take on this clown daddy .

[thekenobee]

*sees that you put up some more Sharpe crack vids.*

*crawls out of my hiding spot.*

*grabs them like I'm a trash panda and they're the biggest box of goodies.*

*shouts back a _-Thank you for my favourite comedy hour!- as I quickly run away to devour the ridiculousness! 🤪💙💙💙

p.s. Living la Vida Loca is soooooo Teresa-coded, that was a brilliant choice, it really is her theme song, isn't it?!?!?!?!

me and my bestie enjoying our Sharpe TV brain rot:

*I’m the possum, of course!

So glad You enjoyed the silly little videos I crafted, Living la Vida Loca is a song about Teresa Moreno and Teresa Moreno ONLY!! Whenever I’m in need of materials to use in a crack I think of Shrek 2 and it just happens!

I’ll be making a Learn Alphabet With Sharpe next so stay tuned for more ridiculousness to come! ;>

[age-of-moonknight]

i just have to say that whenever theres a new comic featuring moon knight i IMMEDIATELY check your blog so i can read your tags... like i genuinely love hearing your thoughts so much

!!!! oh my goodness, thank you so much for taking the time to shoot me a message, particularly one that !!!! honestly has made my entire day! I’m really, incredibly honored and so glad that you enjoy this blog so much. Thanks again and here’s to many more Moon Knight comics and appearances in the future 🤍🖤

[possumsarenice]

Chat is it normal to feel visceral dread when the fandoms of your current two biggest interests are starting to beef with each other?

[naturesapphic]

Hiii are you open to more Mommy!RheaR?

If sooo can you do som hurt comfort where Little!reader wakes up in bed alone (separation anxiety) and goes into a spiral of thinking that Rhea left and Rhea, who just went to get water and maybe check instagram (again) comes back to bed to a crying baby who’s too upset to sleep?

-🟧Anon thx

Separation anxiety

Mommy!rhea ripley x fem!little!reader

Warnings: age regression, hurt/comfort

Rhea was stirred awake by the grumble of her stomach and the dryness of her throat. She careful got out of bed and went into the kitchen to make her a little snack with some water. It wasn’t too long after she left that you started to stir awake when you felt that your mommy’s warm body wasn’t beside you. Your eyes shot opened and looked around and found that your mommy was gone.

Your mind and body started spiraling and coming up with every situation possible to why your mommy has left. “What if she was kidnapped?” “What if mommy fell asleep in the living room? What if she realized she doesn’t want us anymore and left.” Is what you were thinking and the last thought was the one that broke you. You started sobbing and crying for you mommy, hoping she would somehow hear you if she really did leave.

Rhea was finishing up her snack and water when she decided to check instagram for a bit. She went through some fan art and reposted it and liked some photos of her fans doing her makeup looks. She smiled and put her phone away as she threw away her trash and put her cup in the sink. She walked up the stairs and went back to y’all’s shared room, but what made her heart drop was the sound of your cries.

She immediately went over to the bed and got inside of it and pulled your shaking body towards her. “Hey it’s okay baby…mommy’s here…what’s wrong possum?” She quietly shushed you. You sniffled and looked up at her with your bottom lip quivering. “I t-tought c-chu weft m-me mommy…” you whimpered out and Rhea pulled you on top of her and wrapped her strong Buffy arms around your tiny body.

“I would never do that princess. You never have to worry about me leaving you like that. Okay? I’m staying and not going anywhere.” Rhea reassured you and you felt yourself relax at her words but they never fully went away. “S-scared tos s-sweep…” you mumbled against her chest and she sighed softly. “Would you fall asleep if mommy tells you some stories?” She asked you and you nodded your head excitedly which made Rhea chuckle. “Okay little one..” she said and started telling you some childhood stories and some wrestling stories she heard and went through.

By the end of it, you were sound asleep, little snores coming from your mouth as you snuggled into your mommy. A big smile appeared on her face and she got comfy in the covers with you on top of her and fell into a deep sleep like you.

A/n: I’m always open for request unless I say otherwise and thank you for requesting! I hope you liked it #🟧Anon and I hope the rest of you liked it as well. Remember to stay hydrated and to rest! I love y’all :)

[ratskinsuit]

Hey! Love your writing oneshots so much💗💗. I was thinking abt Adam whos surprisingly being subby bitch for female reader, its up to you whether shes a demon or angel. Do your thing!

MDNI

A/N: Guess who’s back bitchesssssss! >:D sorry it took so long for me to come back, my mental health was real bad, but it’s slightly better now! So I have returned to feed you feral trash pandas, queer possums and fancy rats (lovingly). Updates may be slow because im still very busy but I plan to do a bunch of requests so stay tuned! (ALSO I MAY START WRITING FOR CREEPYPASTA. I’m not much into the fandom though so idk lol)

So Adam always comes off as a Dom to most people right?

Bragging about how he makes you “scream his name” every night

Acting like he’s the one domming you

Presenting himself as a high and mighty god in the bedroom

But that’s all completely wrong

Because what people don’t see is how much of a little fucking bitch he is for you

How he’s often tied up in the bedroom, hands tied above him with a pretty red ribbon

Chest adorned with intricate ties and knots

Legs forcefully spread open, presenting himself to you shamelessly

his wings strapped down behind him, ruffled and twitching

His face red, hair messy and tangled from your hands digging into his scalp

Shoulders covered in bite marks, and back decorated beautifully with scratches (*Cough* masochist *cough*)

Eyes blown out with with lust staring down at you, filled with tears as you tear away yet another orgasm from him

his throat is scratchy from begging, the only sounds he can make out now are slurred, sentences as only being fragments and whines and moans of your name as he drools all over himself

He’s honestly so fucking bratty

He loves pushing your buttons, riling you up so you can fuck his brains out later

pretty loud honestly, but luckily he has soundproof walls, because he would probubly die if anyone ever hear how whiny he could be

honestly so up for public sex, push him up against the wall in a far back alleyway and make him forget his own name

Closet sex? Hell yeah

but you gotta gag him otherwise all of hell and heaven would be able to hear him

He won’t ever shut the fuck up so we know he’s good with his tongue.

Aftercare is usually consisted of you tryna get towels to clean him up and him whining and bitching

A/N: Kinda shitty rn because I’m doing this in like a severe thunderstorm with a high probability of tornadoes and I hate that bs so likeeeee- yeah

[tightjeansjavi]

trinkets

A/N: so I woke up this morning thinking about Dieter & gumdrop—better known as trash panda and trash possum 🥺 I just love how silly they are together and I hope y’all do too!

~word count: 1.9k~ yeah—idk what happened lol

Summary: Dieter almost burns his script in front of the director, you’re at home writing Din Djarin fanfiction on your tumblr account, Oh! And something about Dieter cloning his cock in silicone?

Pairing | dieter bravo x f!reader

Warnings: none, fluff, implied smut (phone sex bby), language, dirty talk, dieter and the reader being a menace together, one mention of drugs, readers nickname is gumdrop/trash possum, reader has no physical descriptions, +18 minors dni!

series masterlist

When Dieter is away for a new filming project, you end up house sitting for him because there is no one that he trusts more, (outside of his agent) than you, his gumdrop. Plus, he’s secretly hoping that if you spend more time in his home, that you’ll be open to moving in with him. It’s his genius plan that he of course came up with when he was stoned out of his mind.

He didn’t realize that he could just ask you to move in with him. That was far too simple!

So, for the month that Dieter was away filming, you were lounging in his home like a house cat. He called you multiple times a day to check in on you, and because he missed your voice terribly.

“What have you been up to today, gumdrop?” He was hunched over the side of his hotel bed at an awkward angle. It was a terrible day on set. He was used to the director making last minute changes to the scene, tweaking irrelevant details and minor character traits that no one would pay attention to. Dieter, however, was not prepared for his character's redemption arc to be completely fried to bits.

He compared it to what happens to an egg when you crack it on a pan that is too hot, and the whole thing ends up burnt and crusted onto the pan.

He was furious, and instead of just sticking it through, he stormed off set after he threatened to quit the film entirely.

“Hey, Dee!” You chirped enthusiastically through the receiver. “I’m out by the pool, with a fresh glass of homemade iced tea, and I’m finally getting to write the bit where my slow burn lovers are finally going to kiss!”

He felt his lips curving upwards into a lopsided smile at your enthusiasm as he pictured you in your sunglasses, typing away on your laptop, eyes dancing, little giggles slipping past your lips because he knew just how badly you wanted to write this next part.

“I miss you so fucking much, my little trash possum.” He sighed, scraping his hand down his face before he fell back against the comforter. “This is about that tin helmet dude, right? With the little green guy?”

“Oh, Diets, I miss you too, trash panda.” You paused your typing, reaching for your glass of iced tea and took a sip. “Yes, baby. Din Djarin and Grogu. Speaking of, when you come home next month, do you wanna go to Disneyland?”

“Are Din and the reader finally gonna kiss? Shit, is he gonna take his helmet off and break the creed? Please tell me he takes the helmet off!” He felt like one of your fellow dedicated readers on tumblr, anticipating when you would post the next chapter to one of your many prolific series. “Baby, I would absolutely love to go to Disneyland with you when I get home.”

You giggled softly, shaking your head and set your glass back down on the nearby table. “Dee, I can’t spoil it! You know this, baby. You’re just gonna have to wait for the update like everyone else.” You typed in a few more words to add to the current sentence you were working on before saying, “how’s filming going? Shouldn’t you be on set right now, baby?”

“Well, if I were the tin helmet man, I would absolutely take my helmet off and break my creed for you, Meshla. And then after that I would—” he grumbled and rolled over onto his stomach, “I left set because this fucking director is completely trashing the redemption arc that my character is supposed to have! I had all these cool ideas that pretty much have now just been flushed down the toilet, and I may, or may not have threatened to quit.”

“How romantic, Dee. You’d break your creed for me?” Your lips curved downwards into a set frown when he explained to you what happened on set. “Oh, Dieter, I’m so sorry. Why the hell would the director do that? It sounded like before that it was going really well, too.”

“I’d break every creed for you, gumdrop. But yeah, the guy is on fucking crack, I swear. It’s making my job so much more fucking difficult. Y’know, I thought that after winning my first Oscar that people in this bloodsucking industry would actually take me seriously. Guess not, huh? Guess I’m still just a fuckin’ joke in Hollywood’s eyes.” He scoffed, pinching the bridge of his nose with his ringed thumb and forefinger to suppress his oncoming tears.

“Baby, you are not a joke in Hollywood’s eyes, okay? If you and the director aren’t seeing eye to eye, I think you should give it one last shot to try and meet a middle ground? If he doesn’t budge, then I fully support you in quitting this job. You’re so passionate about your work, Dee. No reason to be pulling teeth just for a paycheck.” You reassured him, setting your laptop off to the side now so you could give your boyfriend your undivided full attention.

“And this is why I fucking love you, gumdrop. You always know how to validate me and talk me down. What the fuck would I do without you?” He stifled a chuckle. “So, I think I’m gonna give myself another hour to be pissed and grouchy about this, and then I’m gonna march my ass back to set, and give this dude a piece of my fucking—”

“Dieter.” You softly warned him.

“Baby, I’m kidding. But I am gonna try and see if he and I can reach a middle ground. And if we can’t, well, guess I’m coming home early, trash possum.”

“As much as I would love to see you sooner, I want this role to work out for you, Dee.”

“Me too, gumdrop.” He scratched at his beard with a sigh, and just when he was about to say more, there was a knock at his door and the familiar chime of his agent's voice. “I’ll call you later, okay? Cause I wanna hear all about the tin man kissing the reader, finally.”

“Okay, baby. Just remember, you’re my Dieter Bravo, and I’m so proud of you.”

“Love you to the moon and back, trash possum. Catcha on the flipside.” He ended the call, tossing his phone to the side and droned out, “You may enter.”

-

Later in the evening, and you were finalizing the final draft of the chapter, Dieter texted you and told you that the conversation with the director went well, and things were back on track.

Dee! This is great news, baby! I’m so happy for you 💗

Me too! He actually agreed that destroying my character's redemption arc was piss-poor writing, and he’s gonna have a new script ready for me in the morning. Did Din finally kiss the reader?

See what happens when you just communicate? So proud of you, baby. And maaaaybe. I just finished finalizing the chapter and now I just have to post it! 🤭

See, now if I never met you, I probably would have torn the guy a new one and then set the script on fire right in front of him. Y’know, like that scene in the Social Network, where Andrew Garfield’s gf sets the scarf on fire in his trash can? CLASSIC! Anyway, I’m gripping the edge of my seat! I can’t wait to read, gumdrop.

Ohhh! Yeah, that scene is a classic! I’m glad that you didn’t set your script on fire, Dee. I should have the chapter posted within the hour. Oh! And before I forget, when you come home next month…I have a surprise for you x.

Shiiii is it you naked in my bed and touching yourself? Is that the surprise? 🥵

Well that’s part of it! Butttt you’ll just have to wait and see! 😉

Oh, sure, tease me, why don’t ya? Got my cock stupid hard already, you little filthy thing.

Pics or it didn’t happen!

Tell me if Din and the reader kiss, then I’ll send you a pic ;)

You are a little shithead

Tell me something I don’t already know, gumdrop 🥰

Fine. Fine. They kiss! He takes his helmet off, but she doesn’t see his face. She keeps her eyes closed because she doesn’t want him to break his creed for her 🥺

Damn, that just made my heart & my cock ache :( Din is such a romantic! Be still, my foolish heart. Your readers are gonna eat that shit up, babygirl.

Please show me. That clone your willy dildo you got me just isn’t the same. And yeah, he is such a romantic! Just like you 💗

Oh, fuck. Are you using it on yourself right now? Hold on, I’m gonna FaceTime you! I need to see this for myself 😉

I miiight be.

Seconds after sending that text, Dieter FaceTimes you and his freehand is already slowly and gently fisting his cock in your view just as he sees you fucking yourself with the silicone dildo of his cloned cock.

“So pretty, good golly. You take my fake cock so well, gumdrop.”

-

It’s hours before Dieter’s flight into LAX is expected to arrive. You had just finished moving in all of your belongings from your apartment, including all of your silly little trinkets and knick knacks that you have now displayed on every available surface in his home.

Tiny animal figurines, built lego sets, little trinkets and bobbles and you even went and bought a cabinet to store yours and Dieter’s Funko Pop collection. Little pieces of yourself and your exuberant personality were scattered about the house. You were, in some ways, like a crow; you loved to collect pretty and shiny things.

When Dieter arrived home, bag slung over his shoulder, and under his eyes, the first thing he noticed was the stack of cardboard boxes neatly stacked next to the front door and his heart immediately swelled at the sight.

“Gumdrop?” He called for you, kicking his shoes off on the rainbow doormat next to yours.

He padded further into the house, stopping at the cabinet with your shared Funko Pop collection and into the kitchen where he saw that along the window sill, you had an array of different animal figurines lined up in a row, and the very first two animals were a little ceramic racoon and possum.Then he finally saw you, lounged out by the pool, typing away like a maniac on your laptop.

He dropped his bag to the floor and pulled open the sliding back door to accompany you outside.

You looked up from the screen at the familiar sound, lips curving upwards into a grin that stretched across your entire face. “Dieter!” You said enthusiastically, setting your laptop off to the side and ran over to him, nearly slipping into the pool on your way because you were so excited.

He met you halfway, wrapping his arms around you and hugging you so tightly it felt like the oxygen was being crushed out of your lungs.

“Hey there, my little crow. You moving in or something?” He said teasingly, loosening his grip around you as your arms looped around his neck, “Cause, I was gonna ask you to move in at some point but I just—”

You shushed him with a kiss, molding your lips against his in a warm embrace. “Surprise.” You carded your fingers through his hair, tugging him in closer, “You’re stuck with me now, trash panda.”

He smiled against your lips, kissing you back deeply, giving your ass a playful squeeze as you yelped in surprise, giving him full access to lick into your mouth, “Wouldn’t’ want to have it any other way, trash possum.”

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[octuscle]

Go to rack and ruin

At the prompting of @maletfwitch, here is a sequel to an older post.

The Abbas were glad to be rid of their unpleasant neighbor. Instead, they had a hardworking and faithful new employee. Unfortunately, the house in the neighborhood did not remain empty for long. And if the Abbas had believed that the old neighbor had been a scourge of God, this one was the apocalypse made flesh. The house was decorated with American flags and MAGA posters downright grotesque. At every prayer time, the neighbor played the American national anthem over outdoor speakers. Not only for the Muslim neighbors, for all neighbors in the immediate vicinity Mr. Carson was an absolute burden. Nevertheless, he had managed to organize a neighborhood watch and become the head of it himself. Needless to say, he preferred to position people in front of the Abbas' property and made no secret of the fact that they were the threat to security and order. Fortunately, the Abbas knew how to help themselves again this time.

When Mr. Carson awoke the next morning, he was not wearing freshly laundered pajamas. Instead, he was wearing a sweaty wifebeater and a pair of worn-out underpants that might have been white at some point. Bleary-eyed, he went to the refrigerator and grabbed a cold Bud light. Fuck, where had he put his chewing tobacco? The kitchen was a mess again. Peter Carson filled a garbage bag with beer bottles, the contents of various ashtrays, and the pizza boxes from the last few days. He went outside, tossed the garbage bag to the others in the front yard. The last ones had been tampered with by those darn rats or raccoons. Miserable vermin. Like the filthy terrorists next door. Still in his underwear, Peter raised the American flag, saluted, took a swig of beer and belched. Old Mrs. Price across the street turned away in disgust and pushed her walker a little faster.

Peter went back into the house. So slowly he had to get to work. His hardware store was opening soon. After a quick shower and a rather sloppy shave, Peter, in his lumberjack shirt, not-so-clean jeans and old work boots, left the house and got into his swank Mercedes. Did not really fit him and also not to his job. He could not even remember when and why he had bought this car. But it was a good car and it had been built by good people. Not by those dirty gooks. In his store, he also only sold things that were built in America. America first!

When he returned home after a long day at work, he cursed his old car. Yes, 30 years ago the Mercedes had certainly been a good car. But the repairs would have been expensive, now neither the air conditioning nor the right turn signal worked. The Teutonic steel was slowly turning into a rolling pile of scrap metal. Oh well, Pete thought to himself as he pulled into the cluttered driveway. Fits the house with the rotten porch and broken fly screens. Pete sat down on the porch with a not-very-cold beer from the decrepit refrigerator, picked up his air rifle and shot at the possums rummaging through his trash.

As they did every night, the police came. The stuffy neighbors would have complained about him again. Pete slurred that the cops should fuck off. The cops fucked off and took him to the drunk tank.

Fuck, if he was late for work again today, he'd lose his roustabout job at the sawmill, too. Just like he had already lost the house and his store. But he loved his life in the trailer park. All good American men here. Always someone around who had a cold beer or a can of chewing tobacco. Just the damn rats! Pete took his rifle and tried to take out some of the beasts. Hehehehe, four had to go down. A swig of beer on top of that. And then off to work in his German sweetheart, which he had tuned so impressively himself.

[mikaela-granger]

The Long Wait (Season 2) Chapter 1

Bad Teeth Part 1

Fandom: Grimm

Pairing: Sean Renard/OFC

The Long Wait Masterlist

A/N: First chapter of Part 2 of the Long Wait Series. Or Season 2 as I like to call it. Make sure to show me some love, as I require external validation. And if you are interested in being added to the taglist, let me know.

“Looks pretty quiet in there.” Monroe commented while checking on the cat. Rosalee and Lorelei were finalising some final ingredients. “Cats don’t um, play possum do they?”

“Not with what I gave it.” Rosalee told him. “Ok, now bring me the cat.”

Wearing thick gloves, usually used for zaubertranks, Monroe opened the carrier and brought it over. Lorelei watched as Rosalee dipped the cat’s paws into the zaubertrank she had made. “What’s supposed to happen?” She asked.

“If it turns yellow, I’ll have a good idea of what the toxin was that infected Juliette.” Rosalee explained. “If it turns green, there’s still a good chance I can help.”

The three watched the bowl and after a moment, it changed colours. “Hey, what about blue?” Monroe asked, looking a little optimistic.

Rosalee, however, did not look happy. She looked up at Monroe and Lorelei. “We have to talk to Nick now.”

Being unable to reach Nick, they hurried over to Nick and Juliette’s house, fearing that Kimura may have paid him a visit. The trio rushed up to the front door, and Monroe began banging on it. After a moment, Nick opened the door.

“Hey, we tried calling, but...” Monroe trailed off. He moved into the house with Rosalee and Lorelei following. As she entered, Lorelei saw what had caught Monroe’s attention. “Dude. What the hell happened here?”

The house was trashed, much like Sean’s had been earlier. The trio continued walking further into the house as Nick closed the front door. “Kimura, remember that guy I was telling you about?”

“Oh man.” Monroe said, however he seemed to be scenting the air. “He’s still here. I can smell him.”

“That’s not a him.” Rosalee said, also scenting the air. “That’s a her.”

Lorelei pulled her dagger from her jacket, while Rosalee and then Monroe woged. Suddenly, a woman in black tackled Monroe, knife in hand. There was grunting and growling, as Rosalee went to help Monroe. Nick pushed her back. “Stop, stop, don’t hurt them, don’t hurt her.”

He pulled the woman in black off Monroe and tried to stop her from attacking him. “Do not hurt him. His name is Monroe.”

“He’s a blutbad.” The woman gasped out.

Nick glanced back at their friends. Lorelei had moved over to them, checking to make sure that Monroe was alright.

“Yeah, Rosalee’s a fuschbau. They are both our friends. Mine and Lorelei’s.”

Lorelei was pissed. First Sean, then Juliette and now this bitch attacked Monroe. Dagger still in hand, she tried moving forward. “Who the hell is this bitch?”

Monroe pushed Lorelei behind him in an attempt to protect her, while also going for the woman. Nick pushed him back. He looked at them. “She’s, my mother.” He said, before focusing on Lorelei. “She’s, our mother.”

Lorelei froze. No, it wasn’t possible. Their mother was dead, so was their father. Had been for over eighteen years. They were murdered, died in a fiery car crash. She stared at the woman who was alternating her gaze between Monroe and Rosalee, and Lorelei.

“Dude.” Lorelei faintly heard Monroe say. “You told me she was…I mean isn’t she supposed to be not so alive.”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought.” Nick replied.

The woman…. their mother spoke up. “I don’t believe what I’m hearing. Are you friends with them?” she asked Nick.

Rosalee spoke this time. “We’re friends with them.” She said, referring to both Nick and Lorelei.

“Yeah, it took a little getting used to for us too, you know?” Monroe told their mother. He looked at Nick. “Did you know she was coming?”

“No.”

Remembering their reason for coming over, Rosalee stepped forward. “Juliette is in real danger, Nick, and we don’t have much time.”

“Who’s Juliette?” Their mother said. Their mother, Mom, Kelly. Lorelei wasn’t sure what to refer to her as. This woman was a stranger. Yeah, she gave birth to her, but she didn’t have any memories of her. Everything she knew came from pictures, Nick and Aunt Marie.

“Oh, wow, so you two really haven’t caught up in any significant way, I guess.” Monroe commented.

Nick turned to Kelly. Ok, guess we are going with Kelly, Lorelei thought to herself. “Juliette’s my girlfriend.”

“And she’s in a coma because of a hexenbiest.” Rosalee said loudly.

“The hexenbiest that Nick destroyed, with our help, by the way. You know, just for the record.” Monroe told her.

“Nick, the spell is called L’Esprit Ailleurs.” Rosale told Nick.

“Literally: spirit elsewhere.” Monroe interpreted.

Rosalee explained what the spell did, including memory loss with symptoms like dementia. They needed to stop the progression; however, they had the ingredients mixed and cooking. The downside was that it took 16 hours before it would be ready. After explaining, Rosalee and Monroe headed towards the door, with Lorelei following them. “Lorelei.”

Lorelei stopped. The first words Kelly had spoken to her since she arrived. “I... have to go help Monroe and Rosalee.” Lorelei stuttered out, before she slipped out the door ahead to the other two.

As she hurried to the car, she heard Monroe say “Dude, I gotta be honest your mother scares the crap out of me, man.”

She was aware that Nick had come outside as well, but she just wanted to get as far away from this house as possible for now. She needed time to process this. Once she had reached the car, Lorelei slipped into the backseat and put her belt on, waiting patiently for Monroe and Rosalee to join her. Once they got in, she asked if they could drop her off at home, telling them she would be back at the spice shop later when the sun was up to get her car and to help.

The ride home was silent. When they dropped her off, Lorelei didn’t say much other than a goodbye before she hurried inside. Molly greeted her as she entered. Lorelei trudged towards her bedroom, checking on the sleeping officers who were slumped together on the couch. Ben was snoring and Lucy was mumbling in her sleep, Daisy still in her lap. A little grateful the officers seemed to be alive, Lorelei continued her trek to her bedroom. Not bothering to get undressed, Lorelei kicked her shoes off and got under the covers. She didn’t think she would be able to sleep but was out once her head hit the pillow.

Lorelei awoke to sound of her phone ringing a few hours later. The sun was up. Lorelei glanced at the clock. It was just before 7am. Groaning, she reached over and grabbed her phone, flopping down against the pillows before she answered it.

It was Nick, calling to check in on her. He also let her know that Kimura was in custody and that Kelly was still at his house, hinting that if Lorelei wanted to speak with her privately, she could. He had an investigation and was on his way to the crime scene. He was happy to hear that Lorelei had gone home and gotten some sleep. After they hung up, Lorelei laid in bed, staring at the ceiling. Letting out a breath, she got up and wandered out into the living area. The officers were gone, and she found a note from Lucy confirming that Kimura was in custody, and she was now free of her babysitters. She had also left her number in case she ever wanted to hang out.

The bell above the spice shop door rang as Lorelei entered a couple of hours later. Freshly washed, clean clothes, and balancing three coffees: two hot coffees, one cold. Lorelei needed the extra sugar.

“Hey sweetie.” Rosalee said, as Lorelei stepped into the side room.

“Hey, I come bearing caffeine.” Lorelei said, smiling at her friend.

Rosalee returned the smile, coming over to grab the coffees. “Thank you. Did you get any sleep?”

Lorelei nodded. “I got a few hours. How about you?” she asked, glancing at Monroe who was seated at the table looking half asleep.

Rosalee shook her head. “Not a lot. I got started on the zaubertrank to counteract Adalind’s spell. Now, its just a matter of waiting.” She placed Monroe’s coffee in front of him before giving him a little shake to wake him up. “Lorelei’s here.” She told him softly.

Monroe spun around. “Hey, how are you? You know, after finding out about your mom’s, uh return from the dead.”

Lorelei shrugged as she sat beside him, reaching for her coffee. “You know, conflicted.”

Monroe nodded. “I guess it was a big shock.”

“Nick said she is still at his house.” Lorelei commented. “He also told me he had an investigation. Said he would call later to check on the antidote.”

Monroe looked nervous. “Ah, so, your mom is sticking around then?”

Lorelei shrugged. “I guess so.”

She saw Rosalee and Monroe exchange a glance before Rosalee changed the subject, asking how the police officers she drugged were. She looked relieved when Lorelei informed her that they had left her house as they had entered. She also let them know Kimura was in custody. Lorelei felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. She pulled it out and saw Katie was calling her. God, she hadn’t even told Katie what was happening. Excusing herself, she wandered further out the back to take the call.

“Hey.” Lorelei said softly, trying to sound like everything was ok.

“Hey, how are you?” Katie asked from the other end.

“I’m ok. Didn’t get much sleep. How are you?”

Katie paused. “Ah, yeah. Good, good. Um…are you free to meet up today? It won’t be for a long…I just need to talk to you about something.”

If Lorelei hadn’t been stressed and sleep deprived, she would have picked up on her girlfriend’s…odd behaviour. “Ah, what time do you start work?”

“No work today. It’s my day off remember. Wow, you must be really tired.”

Lorelei rubbed her eyes. “Yeah, sorry. Um, I’m at the spice shop today. There’s a great place for coffee nearby, and a park. I could do with some fresh air.”

“Sounds good. Send me the address. We can meet up for an early lunch. Around midday?”

“I’ll see you then.” Lorelei said.

“See you then.”

Lorelei returned to Monroe and Rosalee. Monroe seemed to have perked up a bit, while Rosalee was checking the zaubertrank. “Who was that?” Rosalee asked.

Lorelei smiled at her. “You are such a mom sometimes.” Rosalee blushed a little at that comment. “And it was Katie. She wanted to meet up for coffee today. Said she had to tell me something.”

Lorelei did not miss the look that Monroe and Rosalee exchanged. “What?” she asked. Another look was exchanged. “Come on, I saw those looks.”

One last look before Monroe spoke up “It’s just that usually when someone tells you they need to tell you something. It can sometimes mean…”

“Something bad.” Rosalee stated apologetically. “There is rarely good news when someone you’re in a relationship with says they need to tell you something or…”

“We need to talk.” Monroe added, the look on his face indicating that someone had said that to him once, and the conversation ended in bad news.

“Oh.” Lorelei said slowly, sitting back down in her chair. She fiddled with the straw of her drink. “But its not always a bad thing. Right?”

Monroe and Rosalee were unable to answer.

Lorelei was glad when the time to meet Katie came. Monroe and Rosalee had been throwing her sympathetic glances ever since she got off the phone with Katie. She had ended up leaving earlier than necessary to escape their hovering. As she walked up the street, the closer she got to their meeting spot, the more filled with dread Lorelei became. As she reached their meeting spot, she found Katie out the front. “Hey, I grabbed a couple of things for you. A frappe and chicken caesar salad wrap.”

Lorelei smiled at her gratefully, as she took the offered items. “Thanks. I haven’t really eaten yet. You said you had to tell me something.”

Katie nodded, looking nervous. “Yeah, um, let’s take a walk.”

They headed to the nearby park and sat down at a picnic table. Lorelei looked at Katie expectantly, although Katie had a hard time meeting her gaze. Katie let out a breath. “I’m sorry, I’m not sure where to start.”

Lorelei offered her a small smile. “Maybe at the beginning.”

Katie laughed slightly and mumbled something to herself before looking up at Lorelei. “I met my soulmate.”

Of all the things Lorelei was expecting, that was not it. She felt torn. Meeting your soulmate was a big deal. However, Lorelei knew it no doubt meant the end of their relationship. After a moment, Lorelei offered Katie a genuine smile. “You did? Tell me about her, wait, it is a her right? Otherwise it may be awkward.”

Katie nodded, seeming relieved. “Yeah, it’s a her. She actually goes to Portland State as well. I saw her mark when she came in to work yesterday. Same mark, same spot.” Katie explained, a small smile on her face. “She has come in before, but I never paid much attention, she was always wearing long sleeves. But yesterday, she was wearing a tank top, and I saw the mark.” Katie’s mark was just above her wrist, on the inside of her arm. “Her name is Melody, and she’s actually a fuschbau. She waited around for me to finish work, and we spent all afternoon talking.” Katie paused. “But I swear, only talking. We are both in relationships with people we care about. Neither of us wanted to be a cheater, so we are both waiting until we are single.”

“Wait, Melody? Tall, long curly red hair?”

Katie nodded. “Yeah.”

“I think I met her; she came into the spice shop one day while I was there. Scared the shit out of her, of course. But she was really nice, very pretty. If I didn’t have you, I would have given her my number.” Lorelei joked. Katie seemed to relax. Lorelei sighed a little. “I guess this means our relationship has reached its end?”

“I’m so sorry.” Katie said quietly, looking at the table.

Lorelei reached across the table and took her hands gently. Katie looked back up. “It’s ok. We weren’t each other’s soulmates; I knew our relationship had an expiration date. And I am so happy for you. Maybe a little jealous, I am now looking forward to finding my own.”

Katie looked up. “Really?”

“Really.”

Katie sighed. “I don’t want to lose you. You were more than a girlfriend; you were a friend.”

Lorelei smiled. “I feel the same way. You know, if Melody feels comfortable, maybe we can continue to be friends.”

Katie returned the smile. “I think she’ll be ok with it. When I told her about you, she remembered you from the spice shop. Thought it was kind of cool I was dating the cute Grimm.” Lorelei blushed. “I also worry about you. You’ve been getting more involved with your brother’s work. I know you’re a Grimm as well, but your closet friends are friends with your brother. I still want to be here, so you have someone to talk to about that stuff.”

“I would appreciate that.”

Their meeting didn’t last much longer after that. They finished their coffee and food, before heading their separate ways. Not before Katie apologised a few more times. Lorelei went straight to her car and headed home. Once there, she sent a message to Rosalee letting her know what had happened and telling her she just wanted some time alone. Lorelei loved Monroe and Rosalee, but she had no doubt they would be overbearing upon learning about her breakup. Thankfully, she wasn’t really needed to help get the potion to Juliette. Hopefully Nick would understand why she was sitting this one out.

Next Part

Taglist: @zoexme

Banner by @cafekitsune

[possum-quesadilla]

yo, do you have an oc I can draw you as?

Yep! You can draw me as my sona, Blucifer! Or just a strange looking furry creature, or a possum. I’m happy with any of them!

Distraught by my writing? Go ahead, put me in a blender, the electric chair, the trash, or in the woods, anything! (Or give me tiramisu) Go ham. Blucifer was made to be like a dog toy rather than a beloved plush if that makes sense

Sort of hodgepodge reference sheet for Blucifer below!

[themosthatedbeingg]

🦊 { I wanna interact with you from my Lilith side blog but I be a shy nervous bean and I'm not sure if it would even be okay to write with your Lucifer as her. ;w;

🦊 for fairly intimidating:

Noo plz interact with me !! Especially with your Lilith !! <3 I’m mutuals only but we are moots <3 and I would love to rp with your Lilith !! I’m open to any and all Lilith’s! <3

[angelwiththeblue-box]

art progess video to wrap up the new year!!! holy shit guys i can’t believe how many amazing people i’ve talked to on this dumpster fire of an app all of y’all are amazing and i’m so lucky to be considered your friend

i can’t wait to be more unhinged about our blorbos in the next year!! <3

@blueskiesandstarrynights @thedrowningpoetofdionysus @thedragonemperess @depressedtransguy @genuine-possum @beansisarat7 @finleycannotdraw @malecacidd @joshkiszkashusband @sapphossidechick @understandably-odd @youcandalekmyballs @tangledupblue @lab-trash @neonganymede @pensivetrolley @lilacebean @tronagon @pro-crastinate17 @heimeldat @asphyxiatedredherring @ghostlyfanparadise @ghost-light @legless-fish-on-rollerskates @sleep-is-my-enemy @sleepyandbi @someguyiguess @mx-perfectly-fine @dramabeansoup @feral-bookwoom @perseus-jackass

[gently-decaying-flowers]

i realize i haven’t kept up with everyone, or interacted with people to the extent i usually like to

so here’s a shoutout to some people i love and i’m sorry TvT

@shortgaything @if-i-could-give-u-the-moon @niallermybabe @waitingforthesunrise @a-portal-to-nowhere @sad-trash-pigeon @dicklessswonder @chaotically-possum @cc-horan

and many others :’) those are just the ones i can remember/feel like i’ve neglected latelyyyy

i promise i still love you guys so much! stress has been high and energy low ;-; but if you reblog/send asks/dms i promise i’ll do my best to answer TvT

[possumsarenice]

me a few days ago: Oh!! I’ll try making a plushie!! It looks fun and I can make cute plushies of my favorite characters!! :D

me now: “How Many Times Can I Say ‘Fuck’ In Response To A Minor Inconvenience Or Mistake” a thread

[narrators-journal]

Time to go twisted.

A little thing i keep wanting to write but haven’t is a ‘new game+’ RyoMina fic where all 12 Full moon Shadows Flirt with Minato.

Magician is only trying to grab him to hold, priestess only wants Minato in the train, Hierophant wants him to sit with it, Lovers just charms him and screams at SEES to not separate them, fortune trys pulling him into strength’s protection.

When Ryoji finally shows up in November Minato is VERY close to PUNCHING HIM, Minato Loves him BUT COME ON ALL THE SHADOWS TRIED JUMPING HIM!

Do with this imagery as you wish.

Okay, so, again, this is a scenario that is more fitting a series of scenarios, if not an entire fic lmao, so this. Does not have a lot of context to it? But I hope it’s a fun, silly read. Some humor with some angst possibly sprinkled on top, so it was good fun to write it, and I hope that carries through and makes this a good read! Sadly I am not going on hour 20 of no sleep tho, so no promises.

A round, pregnant moon sat in the moonless sky to watch while Minato Arisato paced back and forth in front of the train station’s steps. The soft sound of a possum in the trash nearby the only company the blue-haired wildcard had as he avoided patches of ice on the sidewalk and waited.

All I need to do is meet Ryoji, and fuck off. No need for words, no need for touching, nothing like that.He reminded himself, as he studied the cracks on the pavement with his gloved hands in his coat’s pockets. But what if the thing that brought Ryoji to me the first time was my grief over Shinjiro? I’ve already processed that this time, I was expecting it, I’m not being eaten alive by loss.A small voice pointed out, but the emo shook that thought away. No. Ryoji doesn’t sniff out grief or emotion, he tracks souls and life force-The thought screeched to a halt in his head when he heard the telltale sound of the earlier possum scramble out of it’s trashcan. “What are you doing out at an hour like this?” A familiar, melodic voice called from above a heartbeat after the animal panicked. And, when the wildcard looked up, he was met with the same man he’d fallen for before. The same tall man with swept-back, brown hair, colorful scarf that already made Minato want to choke the oxygen from the god’s brain, and sapphire eyes that dimly glowed in the dark winter night. The man that Minato trusted and wanted with every fiber of his being. “I just want you to know that I have a taser.” He said despite that trust, so much for not saying shit.

So, part of Minato couldn’t blame the tall brunette for the utterly confused look he threw down to the shaggy-haired man while the wildcard took the chance to truly drink in how the brunette used to look while he was lit so well by the moon. Which, was a light source that clearly suited the man. Because, the silver light seemed to turn his hickory hair nearly black, and his vampiric skin tone became like that of a porcelain doll, especially with the too-formal uniform of white button-up and suspender-held black slacks. How the hell did I not question why the fuck this dude was dressed up like that the first time? Honestly, there was so much I failed to pick up on about this man. Minato asked himself before Ryoji crouched down on the edge of the roof to study him more closely. “Here, I’m sorry if I came off as creepy so abruptly. Can I come down without you tasing me now?” He asked after a moment, and the uncertainty in his voice almost bewildered the emo a split second. Though, the brunette didn’t give him much, if any, time to respond before he leapt down.

And as if on instinct, Minato stepped back to catch him. Braced for the usual 230 pounds or so that his Ryoji had, only to basically catch a feather. “Fuck, I forgot how skinny you used to be.” He muttered into the man’s shoulder without much thought while he breathed in the comfortably familiar cold-dirt scent that mingled with the sour, rotten fragrance that clung to the brunette like some fucked up ‘new car’ smell. Only for the reality of the reset to crash back into the midnight-haired emo when Ryoji gave a more confused chuckle and shifted in Minato’s mindless hug. “Excuse me? Have you been stalking my weight somehow? Am Ithe one who needs the taser here, sir?” Fuck me. “No.” Minato quickly said as he pulled his face out of the god’s shoulder, even though the brunette’s own arms didn’t budge from around his waist. “No, sorry, I-I- Let me go, I do legitimately have a taser.” he stammered, only for his frantic attempt to save face to be laughed at more before the tall flirt began to sway him so easily from foot to foot by the shadow as he continued to tease in a sing-song voice. “Seriously? You’re the one who caught me and held me! I’m not the creep who needs to be tased here!” “Ryoji- Sir, let me go! I didn’t mean to-” “Ryoji?”

If there had been a world record for how far a man could put his foot in his mouth, Minato held the crown. Even if the tall man stopped their little dance in the snowy street to look down at him with no fear in those unearthly pools, the wildcard knew he’d fucked himself up the second he watched the single-frame flash of confusion that crossed the shadow’s face shift into amusement. God damn it, this was supposed to be so easy! So quick! Quit fucking it up! Minato scolded himself while Ryoji simply chuckled with no awareness of his own initial reaction. “Oh, so you’re just going mask-off now, huh?” his arms loosened around the midnight-haired wildcard so that he could instead rest his hands on his hips. Though, that did little to give the persona user an out, Minato was bitterly aware of that fact. So, he was left with one option left. “Can I please get a word in, sir? Without you making crude jokes and shit?” he huffed, which got him a silent raised eyebrow and a playful smirk as a greenlight to go on. “Look, I was sent by Gekkoukan to ensure nothing bad happened to you. I’m sorry if I came off like a stalker, I just know your name from your file.” Minato lied. Sure to hold eye contact so that he could both read the brunette’s expression for sparks of suspicion, and to be more believable. “So, you’re not a stalker at all?” Ryoji finally asked, and Minato did his best to not react to the disappointment in his words. “No, I’m just...awkward. Now can we head to the dorms please? It’s one in the morning, I’d like to go to sleep before class starts.” Ryoji nodded lightly at that and finally let the wildcard go to hide the dark disappointment in shame. Which, the midnight-haired emo took as his cue to turn on his heel to wordlessly led him off to where he assumed the boys' dormitory was. Thank god he thinks with his dick, or else I’d be so far beyond fucked. Minato thought while they left the train station at long last in a tense, awkward silence. A silence that was not helped by the way the insects and animals around at such a late hour fled from the tall shadow’s aura of rot. An aura that Minato was pretty used to thanks to the time he’d spent with the god, so it was easy to blame the thunder of his heart on his failure to stick to his plan rather than the embodiment of death that trailed behind him in near silence. “Quit staring at my ass.” “No.”

[c0zmo-writes]

Notes for Chapter 8 of Birds of a Feather.

Chapter 8- Conflagration

@possum-quesadilla @raineisinkless @crawlingcarcass @katslitterbox

“Mmhr?”

Cat trilling noises !!

“We’re gonna have to have a conversation about last night eventually,” she said. “Ugh. ‘M not ready to have that talk,” he groaned. “Well then, we’re gonna have to have a conversation about how to defeat your mom.” “I’m not ready to have that talk either.”

Denial only gets you so far, bud.

“She took a deep breath, walked out the front door, and stepped into her hearse.”

Shilo drives a hearse!! I’ve wanted to drive a hearse for years.

“Beetlejuice (11:36): “i lpbw u”

Beetlejuice (11:36): “libe”

Beetlejuice (11:36): “kobe”

Beetlejuice (11:37): “live”

Beetlejuice (11:37): “close enuff”

His fingers are too big for him to properly type on the screen. He’s also not great at spelling.

“Bug? If I walk in there and you’re sticking my pads to your face again, I’m really not gonna be happy,”

This has happened before. Twice overall, but Shilo only walked in on him doing it the second time.

“Thankfully, she was only a bit taller than Shilo.”

Juno is 6’3” currently. Shilo is 5’10”. Juno can get to be over 7 feet tall after a rebirth.

“She had gray hair that coiled and floated around her head in a cloud.”

Her hair is like smoke! When she was a lot younger, it used to be black with orange-red streaks, but it gradually changed into what she has now.

“With the speed of a cheetah and the grace of a rollerskating ferret on crack, she grabbed a trash bag, threw it over Juno, sprinted down the stairs and outside, spun the bundle of bird above her head, and chucked Juno far into the woods, all while silently thanking her parents for forcing her to do track and field from middle to high school.”

My beta readers thought this part was funny. That last bit is based off of my own parents who tried (and failed) to get me to participate in sports back when I was in middle school.

“Did somethin’ happen?” He asked groggily.

Poor guy was sleeping in the basement during all of this.

“There was a sudden spread of warmth around her head. The injured area tingled, then the pain faded away. Now, she only had a dull throbbing pain in her head. Not completely fixed, but some of the pain was definitely relieved.”

Healing powers !!!