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alteridolriley · 4 years ago

Note

"In awe, the first time you realised it" with rivya pretty pretty pleaasee

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAXI!!! this ask is old af but I was inspired so I wrote you this rivya drabble fic thinggggg idk i hope you enjoy it!!

(These characters are our own ocs based on the Sanders Sides from this blog. This is an irl AU so enjoy!! Some Sides might show up idk why don't you read and find out hehe)

On mobile so sorry for no read more :(

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River felt himself waking up; the stream of his consciousness pulling his thoughts to the real world around him. He slowly opened his eyes to see the glow of the early morning sun peeking through the edge of the curtain he swore he had tucked behind the bookshelf so it wouldn't get him right in the face, but alas, it had failed. River sighed, pulling their comforter over their head in denial.

Mondays sucked and River did not want to pull themselves out of bed, but within seconds of stretching their arms above their head, a shrill alarm from their phone began to sound on the side table next to their bed. River slapped around until successfully snoozing the alarm before throwing the blanket off.

There was one reason and one reason only River was getting up for class on this day. He had that one class today - economics. And that one boy was in it. The transfer student.

He had the gall to talk to River the day before, and several days before that. As well as the day the teacher had given him the seat next to River.

"Hello." The boy had said as he sat down. His hood covered most of his face but River could see his right eye and a soft smile on his face. "My name is Arya. It's nice to meet you."

River had glanced his way, their chin balanced on their palm. With the intent to simply brush him off, River had opened his mouth only to feel his words caught in his throat once he had made eye contact with the gentle boy.

"I'm River." River had managed to cough out that day. "Pleasure."

It was a dry introduction, but it didn't seem to offend Arya at all. He had smiled again and turned to his bag in front of him, pulling his notebook and pen out as River heard the teacher begin to speak.

River had been brought back to his dorm room by a jolt of him missing his pant leg while trying to get dressed. Arya had left him feeling weird that first day and every day after that, Arya had continued to say hello and be super kind to him. River didn't really understand why Arya was acting that way-- if Arya knew River at all, he would know that River didn't deserve that kind of kindness.

River zipped his jacket up and heard his cell phone begin to chime again, but this time it was a text tone. He absent-mindedly reached for the phone, unlocking it in one motion.

He bit his lip as he saw a message from his brother- his twin, Meph. Meph had chosen not to go to college but to work at a friend's laboratory. River sometimes regretted going to college but since he was there on a scholarship, it only made sense to stay. Besides, Meph had only chosen not to go to college to help River actually go for his dream: to be a marine biologist.

River loved the ocean. It was his favorite place to be and if he managed to put his past behind him and become a marine biologist, he'd never have to leave the ocean again. Meph had gotten the job with his friend to pay the bills so River could focus on school.

Meph the Grump: Hey so Nic needs me to stay late again this weekend so I won't be able to come up to visit. Maybe we can work something out for next weekend. Just let me know.

River sighed and locked his phone, shoving it into his pocket. That makes the 3rd time Meph canceled on him in the last month. River didn't really know what Nicolaus did for a living but Meph was apparently very important to the lab. It paid for the roof over his head so River ignored the pain of disappointment running through his chest.

He grabbed his bag before stopping by the mirror near the front door. Messing with his hair for only a few moments, he sighed and left the house, locking the front door behind him. His college was a mere three blocks away so walking was the simplest way of getting there.

River began the trek down the semi busy street, staring at the ground as he walked. From the corners of their sight, River watched the world go around him: People walked solo past; some girls in groups crossing the street laughing together; a single mom holding her baby while opening the door to a store.

The world kept going despite of all the troubles people had. River knew this and yet he always wondered what he looked like from that perspective. Was he intimidating? Were they interesting to the world around them or forgettable?

River adjusted his back on his shoulder as he stopped at a crosswalk. Several people lingered around him as they all waited for the traffic light to change. As he considered his plans for the weekend now that Meph wasn't coming into town anymore, he realized he was staring across the road at a familiar face.

It was Arya. However, Arya was standing against a brick building with another few men around him. River scrunched his face in curiosity and confusion. He had never seen Arya outside of class and he walked this street everyday. Wouldn't they have crossed paths before?

River heard the chime of the crosswalk allowing pedestrians to pass as suddenly one of the men grabbed Arya by the shoulder rather roughly. Arya stumbled into one of the other taller men who shoved him back towards the building. River felt his blood boil nearly instantly as he took off across the street. He was still fairly far away but he picked up the pace as the three men pulled Arya down an alleyway behind the brick building.

"I promise I'll have it to you soon. I will. I will." Arya's voice filtered through the air as River got closer. It was staggered and breathless; shaky and soft. He was clearly scared. "I know I said today, but my job hasn't paid me yet so--"

CRACK.

River dashed around the corner, hearing a bone crushing noise as they did so. It took River's eyes a few seconds while blinking to adjust to the darkness of the alley only to see Arya on the ground, unmoving.

"You bastards! What did you do to him?" River shouted as he stomped forward, leaving barely any space between himself and the strangers. His heart was racing-- Arya still hadn't moved. "Arya! Hey!" River shouted as the men laughed.

"Arya has a friend? Haha, that's the funniest thing I've heard all day," said the tallest man, turning to face River. "You should scram, kid, if you know what's good for you."

"Kid? I'm not a child, and I'm not scared of you." River said confidently, even though his hand was trembling. He was convinced it was his anger peaking. "Get away from him." River snarled through bared teeth.

The leader looked at his two friends and all three of them laughed.

"Kid, I don't think you understand the situation you're in." the Leader scoffed before suddenly darting towards River with his fist reared back.

In one step, River bent down, dodging him swiftly and flattening his right hand, shoving it perfectly timed onto the man's elbow forcing it the wrong direction. River heard the satisfying snap of the bone.

"Sonofabitch!" The leader shouted, falling to the ground, grasping towards his left arm. His partners ran to his side as he struggled to stand. "I won't forget this!" He growled as the three of them took off out of the alley.

River relaxed his stance, releasing a deep breath before spinning on his heel and dashing back to where Arya lay still unmoving. River fell to his knees, picking Arya up gently.

"Hey... hey Arya." They whispered, shaking the boy. Within a minute, Arya's eyes opened and he immediately pushed away from River, the innate fear of the other men still fresh. "No, Arya, it's okay-- it's me." River held his hands up.

Arya's breathing slowed as he realized the other three men were gone. His hand snapped to his head, his left eye closing in pain. Silence fell between the two of them. River wasn't sure what to say, and Arya... he looked like he might pass out at any moment.

"What are you doing here?" Arya broke the silence. His voice was scratchy but still the soft, kind tone River was used to hearing in class. "This doesn't concern you."

River scoffed, "The hell it doesn't! Who were those men? What did they want from you?" Arya stayed silent, choosing to look anywhere but River's face. "Fine then, I guess it doesn't matter..." he stood up to leave.

"Wait!" Arya jumped to his feet.

River turned to see Arya reaching out towards him only for the boy to be overcome by his injuries. His eyes rolled back and he fell towards the ground. River was quick enough to catch him before he made contact with the pavement. The momentum of the fall had caused Arya's hood to reveal his full face. River blinked in surprise-- the right side of Arya's face was covered with a severe burn scar. How had they never noticed it before?

Out of respect, River pulled Arya's hood back over his head and held the boy close.

"Excuse me."

A voice from behind them both caused River to whip around, holding on to Arya even tighter.

A man stood there, holding his bowler hat in front of his face. His cape like top blew in the wind of the alley and his yellow gloved hands nearly look illuminescent in the alley.

"Who are you?" River demanded.

"I am that boy's guardian, and I would appreciate you giving him to me." The man said as he put his hat on his head. It revealed his face to be similar to Arya except the left side of his was... a snake, wait what?

River stood, holding Arya in his arms. "Why should I believe you? Maybe I should take him and run away?"

"No, that's not necessary. You see... that boy is not human, my dear." The man began to walk closer. "Well, not anymore." He stopped walking. "Ah, how rude of me. I forgot to introduce myself. My name is Janus."

"Okay... Janus what do you want with Arya?" River questioned, backing up a step.

"Oh no. You misunderstand. Arya came to me, you see. Alone and with nothing to lose, he made a deal. A deal with a snake." Janus explained, the snake side of his face never losing the grin it held. "Losing your entire family in a fire you caused and leaving yourself scarred for life is a rough thing to go through. He wanted to forget-- however it comes with a price."

"Yeah well... he needs medical treatment from whatever those assholes did to him so I'm taking him to the hospital. He's not going with you." River said firmly. "So I'll be leaving now."

River adjusted Arya in his arms before brushing past Janus toward the main street. River never once looked back and kept walking, avoiding the busier streets with nosey people. A regular hospital would ask too many questions. It was time to pay an old friend a visit.

After a ten minute walk, River arrived at what looked like a simple flower shop. He walked inside. A boy stood behind the main counter and turned to face them.

"Oh River! It's been awhile." He said. "Oh... is your friend hurt?"

"Yeah... can you help him Gabriel?" River asked as Gabriel held a back door open for them to walk through.

"Of course. Let's get him checked out." Gabriel assured.

River placed Arya on a rather large bed and sat down across from him and Gabriel in a plastic chair. River could feel the tension leaving his body finally and the realization of everything that happened was making his mind race as he watched Gabriel check Arya's vitals. Who were those three original men? Who was Janus? Was Janus telling the truth when he said Arya wasn't human anymore? What did that even mean? Nothing about this morning made any sense.

"River?" Gabriel's voice called them out of their stupor and River could see Arya was covered by a blanket now and his hoodie has been removed. "Are you okay? Do you need me to check you too?" Gabriel reached and felt River's head before they could lean away.

"No I'm fine." River assured.

Before Gabriel could ask again, a chime went off above their heads: a customer had walked into the flower shop. Gabriel excused himself and left the room. The room became silent other than the ticking of the clock on the far wall.

River stood up and walked to look at Arya. He looked peacefully asleep and more relaxed than before. Gabriel must've given him some medication. River pushed Arya's bangs out of his face and Arya stirred a bit, as if he was going to wake up.

"River.... wait.. please..." Arya murmured, his eyes still closed but tightened in fear. A dream. "I can explain... don't go... I need you."

River grabbed Arya's hand, intertwining their fingers. Arya seemed to relax and stopped talking. River was an idiot-- why hadn't he noticed it before? All of those feelings towards Arya... it was love. A need to protect.

"Don't worry, Arya..." River sat down on the side of the bed, brushing their fingers down the side of Arya's face. "I'm not going anywhere."

FIN.

#sanders sides #ocs #my ocs #arya sanders #river sanders #though technically they arent sanders here but idc #janus sanders #rivya #happy birthday maxi 2021 #sorry this wasnt longer ;^; work sucks

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elenatria · 5 years ago

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That moment in the 1x02 Chernobyl episode when Bryukhanov attacks Legasov because he can't tell how the reactor can explode, then mocks him, and Legasov is troubled, so Boris steps up and asks Bryukhanov about the graphite on the roof, and he's like "How dare you? Only I can yell at Valery. Am I clear?" And my heart bursted.

HHAHAHAHHA omg it never occurred to me to see it that way?? Brilliant. A want a ficlet on that scene.

You know what, it’s about time people got to know why this pairing is so hot and tragic and inspiring and and… And I mean I’m not crazy for shipping them, am I?? I mean ok ok “real people with tragic destinies” etc etc but but b-but the writer and the actors are doing SUCH a great job giving us the enemies-to-friends (or lovers) trope so effortlessly in a matter of, like, two episodes (btw I didn’t need two episodes, just the first time they met was enough for me to ship them hahah am I nuts or am I nuts).

Alright, SPOILERS.

So at the end of the first episode Boris Shcherbina, the head of the Bureau for Fuel and Energy (aka aggressive, unapologetic apparatchik and bureaucrat), is calling Valery Legasov, the first deputy director of the Kurchatov Institute of Atomic Energy (aka awkward nerdy idealist scientist), to bark some orders at him and essentially tell him “We don’t want your opinion, nerd, you’re here to answer questions, nothing more, kbye.” So at their very first contact Boris is rude, entitled and arrogant to Valery, even hanging up on him.

In the second episode Valery reads Boris’ report and freaks out. When he joins General Secretary Gorbachev’s committee, Boris tries to downplay the disaster, his arms sprawled out all over the armchair as if nothing happened. and looks at Valery in utter disbelief when the scientist tries to convince everyone how serious things are. Obviously Boris would rather be home with his wife or something. Btw in the show Valery doesn’t have a wife, he only has a cat, cat=loneliness, geddit?

When Gorbachev orders them both to visit the power plant Boris cannot believe his ears. He’s stuck with this annoying nerd, a scientist for crying out loud, a know-it-all, the kind he obviously hates because, as an apparatchik, he probably climbed the social ladder through his connections in the party and not through studying. So he obviously loathes anyone who knows more than him. He’s an alpha and wants to remain one.

Look at his face and body language when they’re left alone, he’s totally blaming the Nerd for becoming a burden. His burden.

Here it is, the “unlikely partners” trope.

And now things start to get interesting.

As they walk towards the helicopter Boris is totally ignoring Valery. They’re not exchanging a single glance.

In the helicopter Boris asks Valery how a nuclear reactor works. Valery finds it difficult to explain and Boris quickly shows how inferior he feels to anyone who has studied more than him, so he puts on his aggressive and arrogant facade.

He acts SO entitled that he even threatens Valery that he’ll have him killed if he doesn’t explain how the reactor works.

At this point Boris inspires nothing but fear and disgust.

HOWEVER when Valery fidgets his pockets trying to find something to write on Boris is quick to give him both a pen and a piece of paper. Even if he has his poker face on, his gesture is clear. He’s helping Valery for the first time and not just because he wants to learn about reactors.

When Boris quickly catches the metaphor of the neutron being like a “bullet” Valery seems startled. Apparently Boris is a good student, who would have thought!

But as soon as the explaining is over Boris shuts Valery out once more saying he doesn’t need him anymore. Entitled and arrogant af.

Now it’s Valery’s turn to seethe internally because he’s stuck with this total asshole.

Aaaaand then we get to the part when I totally flinched in surprise and I was like… “Okayyyyy do they want us to ship them now or what?…”

Because Valery, in a state of panic, finds the courage (or might I say, has the nerve) to call Boris by his first name (back then Soviet people would call each other by both names as a sign of respect). Valery probably mimicked Gorbachev using “Boris” in the previous scene but Boris simply. Won’t. Have it.

He instantly snaps at the unexpected intimacy and I’m over here fangirling like crazy because who else would snap at terms of endearment and intimacy but a man who’s not used to it - and is probably craving for it. But not from this carrot-headed Nerd. Definitely not from him, he loathes the guy, okay??

Boris exercises his power once more threatening to have the pilot shot if he doesn’t fly over the reactor and for the first time Valery manages to “outrank” him by explaining to the pilot why he’d rather be shot than fly over the reactor. Valery convinces the pilot to disobey Boris - power play at its best. Boris is clearly defeated, maybe he’s never been defeated before.

And this is the first time Boris touches Valery (hopefully not the last).

As the helicopter turns to avoid the reactor Valery trips and almost falls on Boris’ lap. Notice how Boris doesn’t push him away but he rather steadies him and helps him sit. For a man who loathes his partner and is not used to intimacy he’s rather… well-behaved.

Of course the look on his face when the scene ends says it all: “You’ll pay for this, nerd.”

We’re 25 minutes into the episode and we finally see a glint of doubt in Boris’ eyes when Chief Engineer Fomin and the plant’s director Bryukhanov mouth off to Valery, disrespecting him and questioning his expertise and patriotism. For some reason something clicks inside Boris. Maybe he too had dealt with too many people doubting him and treating him like shit in the past. Maybe he feels Valery, for all his obnoxiousness, doesn’t deserve that kind of behaviour. Maybe the proud Head of the Bureau for Fuel and Energy will lose face if his partner is disgraced. Another nanosecond of doubt and he decides to step up. He uses Valery’s observations to talk about the core exploding.

At first I thought “Oh goooood I can’t believe this asshole is ripping off Valery’s observations to act all clever in front of his inferiors. What an asshole.”

But it turns out that he’s siding with Valery and starts to trust his judgement and expertise. Maybe because, for all his lack of formal education, he’s too clever to not know suck ups, cowards and liars when he sees them.

Next he challenges the two men to prove Valery wrong. Perhaps he does want to prove Valery wrong and ridicule him. Or perhaps he’s rooting for him already.

When Valery pushes him to evacuate Pripyat, Boris snaps again. He’s not here to follow the Nerd’s orders.

But the very next minute Boris walks away with the promise to get Valery as much boron and sand as he needs to put out the fire, like a king eager to impress his betrothed. “I’m going to get YOU.”

As soon as Boris leaves, General Pikalov is quick to offer Valery some help.

Because they both know they have long days and long nights ahead of them.

I will come back to the subject of the hotel in my next post. There’s another fanfiction trope right there, two unlikely partners forced to stay in the same hotel (or hotel room if you want your imagination to run wild). YESSSS.

Cut to the hotel room. An exhausted Valery massages his own neck (oh baby I’m sure you would like someone else to massage it for you.)

Boris enters his room (*their* room..?) without knocking - apparently someone doesn’t feel the need to lock his door.

Boris is happy to announce they’ve been successful at dropping sand and boron into the reactor but Valery doesn’t share his cheerfulness.

AND THIS IS WHEN BORIS STARTS CARING ABOUT VALERY’S OPINION AND FEELINGS. The “what?” cliche when someone is not reacting while his friend/lover is begging for a response. Because. Boris. Needs. Valery’s. Approval. That’s why.

Valery insists that the city should be evacuated and Boris reassures him that they’re staying there “so it must be safe.”

But the way he utters those words in a hoarse whisper, shaking his head confidently, is almost like he’s saying “I’m glad we are staying here. Together.”

When Valery gets carried away and slaps Boris in the face with the horrible truth, Boris loses the ground beneath him.

But he doesn’t look just shocked. He looks hurt. Hurt that Valery didn’t sweeten the pill for him.

Valery instantly regrets his bluntness and takes a step towards Boris as if to comfort a helpless child. Or a very good friend. But he can’t really hug him, shush him and tell him everything is going to be okay, can he? So he takes a step back.

“I’m sorry”…? What?? You just met the guy and you hate him and he hates you! Get a grip!!!

Boris feels so horrible that it takes him ages to pick up the phone.

When they join Gorbachev’s committee again to brief him on the crisis Boris seems totally lost, a fact that doesn’t go unnoticed by Valery who stares at him, concerned.

When Boris finally comes to terms with his own mortality he steps up once more, taking control of the situation. Valery fails to convince the workers to go to the basement and open the valves and that moment… I just knew it was Boris’ turn for a glorious inspirational speech. And boy, does he deliver. Best, most laconic, most convincing inspirational speech I’ve ever seen. He appeals to the workers’ patriotism and self-sacrifice and he succeeds. So he’s not educated and he’s not as clever as a scientist but his true talent shines here, that of leadership. Inspiring people to do the right thing, like a true general. They’re at war and Boris knows he’s the man for the job.

And now it’s Valery’s turn to look at him in utter awe.

“That’s him. That’s my guy.”

And I haven’t even talked about episode 3 yet.

Oh god, ep 3, I mean…

#spoilers #chernobyl #jared harris #stellan skarsgard #valery legasov #boris shcherbina #valoris

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lurid-madness · 5 years ago

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I feel like I have nowhere else to vent and I know nobody I know personally follows me on here so here I go, let me vent

My mom has never really shown me much affection or told me she loved me very much and for a while that never really bothered me because I didn’t know any different. She’s also never uplifting, or encouraging, we don’t share our feelings and I so desperately want to be able to do that. She’s always putting me down and criticizing every little thing I do and I don’k know I just can’t take it’s anymore. I’ve been crying in my room trying to get my final done that’s due tomorrowa I’m in so much emotional pain. My parents went away for the weekend to go camping and i stayed home. I’ve been wanting to dye my hair for a while now but she’s never let me . I’m 18 and I told her I wanted to dye my hair and she was so mad and told me how bad it would look and how bleaching and dyeing my hair at home would turn out horrible and that’s just a mom thing to say but my dad told her she should just let me do it. So they left and I did it. It’s hot pink a little purple and I love it. Over the weekend walking around town with my friend and going to work I felt so pretty and amazing in my new hair . So the day my mom was coming home I texted her like hey I did dye my hair I just wanted to prepare you and she asked for a picture to “prepare herself some more” and I sent it and she hated it . And that brought my mood down quite a bit and I laid in my room feeling drained until she came home when I bolted up excited to see her again and happy she was home and also excited to show her my hair in person hoping she would see what everyone else saw and loved. (I’ve been getting compliments left and right all weekend) but she looked at me and said she hated it she said I looked like a drug addict and I looked ugly . I tried to joke and brush it off in the moment but that hurt so bad. I felt so good before. And hearing that from your mom hurts so bad . She kept looking at me with this face that showed how genuinely she disliked It it wasn’t just because she was upset if dyed it I could tell she meant every word she said. So I was sad and my dad came home a little while after her in his own car and he didn’t like it much either but he’s always been warmer with me so he hugged my the second he saw me and told me I looked Chinese (?) which makes no sense I’m Mexican af and I only dyed my hair hot pink ? Idk but I could tell he wasn’t too upset it’s my hair he said . I went to my room feeling really sad and emotional , this whole situation just broke me, it was like the straw that broke the camels back almost I tried to not cry so she but I ended up tearing up . I posted in Instagram how I my parents hated it and i was sad and I received so many kind messages telling me how much they loved my hair and how it looked so good on me to not let my moms worked get to me. But it’s my mom you know? Isn’t your mom supposed to be uplifting and always tell you you’re beautiful no matter what? It hurt . But recently I’ve just been so down about how she treats me, she’s so negative a rude . She’s always said I don’t deserve respect because I’m her daughter and she’s my mom, she’s so overprotective but it just feels like she doesn’t trust me with anything . She’s always calling out every single mistake I make and getting so mad Over the smallest things and putting me down about them. But she never says anything if I do something good, or says she’s proud of me or anything positive . She scares me . She’s always scared me. I don’t know what to do, should I talk to her ? I really want to but I’m so scared of her and I feel like she won’t understand and just get mad at me. I don’t think I’ll be able to take it if she disregards my emotions. ADVICE IS WELCOME if you actually read this please help me. I feel like I just need somebody to understand me and I need comfort. I’ve never gotten it from anybody else and I really need some love right now . Thank you.

#helpme #motherproblems #motherissues #ineedadvise #sad #feelingdown #emotional #confession #advise #whatshoudido #venting #vent #angry #parents #ineededtovent #ineedlove #loveneeded #love #comfort

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nestacherons · 6 years ago

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do u have lucien headcanons? is there something u would like to say about him or his character? sorry for these random questions i just want people to talk about him why is him underappreciated?? ;;;;;

i’m flattered and honored you just came to me to talk about lucien♡. please, let’s talk all night about him. because I LOVE HIM SO DAMN MUCH, I JUST WANNA TURN THIS HOUSE INTO A COURT TO MAKE HIM FEEL SO WELCOME AND TREAT HIM WITH THE RESPECT HE DESERVES AND THE LOVE HE DESERVES. ok buckle up.

i’m so angry at how badly his character has been treated, everyone is so fucking mean to him and disrespectful…………. he doesn’t deserve any of it. feyre says to elain in acofas that she just wants them (lucien and elain) to be happy but honestly? her actions? like…… mistrusting lucien and making fun of what he said to her, ugh i’m so angry. i still can’t forgive that she involved lucien in his revenge campaign against tamlin. that night when she knocks on his door, pretending she had a nightmare and lucien hugs her, holds her and tells her he’s sorry… ugh man. i still feel like he didn’t deserve to be thrown into the same wagon as tamlin (i’m not talking about the fandom but about feyre). he was really trying to change tamlin’s mind in acomaf, he was doing his best. and feyre acted like he never cared………………………….. i love him so much, he’s so loyal. and he still can’t call anywhere home. but he deserves so much to find his own place, to make his own friends (real friends that REALLY CARE ABOUT HIM AND LOVE HIM), he deserves it so much♡. i even wonder if sarah literally doesn’t like this character cause OH BOY.

my headcanons include:

i think if someone makes a first good impression, he’s gonna be really friendly and easygoing and ofc sarcastic af

but if they don’t, then he won’t bother to try to get to know them better, he will be respectful towards that someone (unless they’re just mean, rude and knows they have done something wrong) but he won’t care and will move on

he’s a really thoughtful friend (ugh come on, he went all the way to the night court just to say happy winter solstice to feyre and elain and bring them presents😭)

he never forgets, he knows what you’ve done for him and he’s never gonna stop being thankful for whatever that is you did for him

i think he likes to take long walks, either for fun or to ease his mind

i think he likes to give kisses on cheeks

and that he spends some nights reminiscing about the autumn court, the smells, the colors, the sound of crunchy leaves… i think he misses it dearly… (it breaks my heart)

he likes to read!

and he cares a fucking lot!!!

he doesn’t open up his heart to just anyone but when he does it, he’s gonna love you very much

the adventurous kind

romantic getaways include exploring some forest and swimming in a river

kisses on the neck

when he’s drunk he laughs way too easily and he’s a thousand times more sarcastic

also stubborn as fuck

he’s loyal as fuck, also very hard-working and a nature boy (or fae shkdd) and that’s why i’m 100% sure he’s a hufflepuff

i think friendship to him means something that should last forever, unbreakable ties

i think he spends part of his free time at the Day Court, just hanging out with Nuan and letting her talk and teach him stuff

because he likes to learn

you know, i really liked the idea of lucien and elain together. i thought they would make such a lovely couple. but it really annoys me how elain never even tried, how much she ignored him, not even a hello. i get it, she doesn’t owe him anything, but, but but i think she was being just so rude. but then i started thinking that maybe lucien and vassa could be a good idea. they seem to like each other and enjoy each other’s company. i just really want him to be happy, to love and to be loved. to find peace. to really feel safe and find somewhere he can call home. wherever that is. (i really wanted him to be part of the inner circle, to stay close friends with feyre but i think that obviously won’t work. i really hope we learn more about the band of exiles, i wanna know everything!! how did they decide to get a manor together? and what do they do? everything! from what we know, they do seem to care about lucien (or at least, they like him, enjoy his company and TREAT HIM AS AN EQUAL. “i’m not staying with them. the manor is ours” their manor, their place, theirs.) gods, i love him so much, so much even though i like feyre a lot and i love rhysand and the inner circle, to think about their interactions with him and the way rhysand talked about him, makes me so angry, makes me want to say ok nevermind fuck you all, i’m leaving with lucien. oh boy, this got so long, forgive me but i, love him. he’s my favorite acotar character (along with, well obviously, nesta). by the way, interesting!! how sarah said that she originally planned lucien and nesta to be together!! (not that i think that that would have been a good idea but) HA!! my two favorites… anyway, I REALLY NEED HIM to find out that helion is his real father, i really need them to know and to fix this mess, he deserves it, he needs it. (though i wonder if he suspects it…)

TL;DR WE STAN THIS FAE AND

IN THIS HOUSE WE LOVE AND SUPPORT LUCIEN AND WE WOULD FIGHT AND DIE FOR HIM WITHOUT HESITATION ♡

#oh boy look at that shdkfhksjds #lucien vanserra #acotar #m:acotar*#anon #whispers from afar

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akamaiden · 6 years ago

Note

HI MARIII, congrats on your 700 followers (sorry, i'm late af) ♡ may I get number 4 from sarcastic list and number 7 from nsfw? For ivar, yay

A/N: Okay this the sequence for this Drabble. Also, italic means flashback.

Pairing: Ivar x Reader (platonic).

Warnings: Ivar gets what he deserves.

Words: 1098.

You were walking around the streets of Kattegat, you had some things to do before you get some rest.

Raids were what get you living and everything but settling down after the raids was so good as going on one.

You went to the blacksmith to order some new daggers and you talked with him for some time.

When you leave him you saw Ivar standing against to the wall looking at you. You had two options talk to him or ignore him, you chose the last option. You were almost leaving him behind when he grabbed you by your arm and slammed you against the wall.

“What the actual fuck?” you groaned.

“I want to talk to you,” Ivar said.

“I don't have nothing to talk to you, Ivar,” you said.

“So my brother fucking you is nothing?” he asked.

“This is none of your business,” you said.

“I thought you loved me. Good way to show your love, fucking my brother,” he said.

“Are you even hearing yourself? You are married! Remember when I said what I felt for you? You said that you didn't feel the same and you'd marry that stupid slave,” you said.

“Freydis. Her name is-”

“I don't give a fuck about her name! Fuck you, Ivar! I share my body with who I want and you have no right to say a shit about it!” you said with your voice trembling.

You and Ivar used to be best friends and he was the first man that you loved and for some time you really believed that you and him will ended up marrying and having at least four kids.

But when he became the leader of the Great Heathen Army everything changed. He wasn't your best friend anymore, he didn't accept anyone's suggestions, he was rude and sometimes even cruel with his own people.

And obviously he had a woman at his side, or his lap. A stupid girl that used to be a slave. You always felt that had something wrong with her.

You even tried to stop Ivar from marrying her but it was pointless. He used to think with his dick when it becomes to her.

You tried everything, you even confessed your feelings for him.

“I've always loved you and I always will. Please, don't marry her. Don't hurt me like this,” you said to him.

“I don't feel the same way... I see you like a sister, Y/N,” he said.

And since then everything changed. Ivar was no longer your best friend, he didn't even talked to you. It was like you didn't exist anymore.

This was like six moons ago and the only thing that kept you alive was Hvitserk. He was such a sweetheart. Always worried about you, always doing everything that he could do to bring a smile to your face.

One day you two drank a way too much in a feast and when he guided you to your house, he ended up staying and then you two had a really intense night together.

It was your first time with a man and sincerely there was no better partner for this. Hvitserk made you feel loved and desired.

Gods, you were slowly forgetting Ivar. When you were with Hvitserk you didn't even remember Ivar's existence.

And probably because you're no longer available to give your life for the man in front of you, he was now requiring explanations from you.

You didn't notice exactly when you started crying you just saw Ivar getting closer to you, cleaning your face from the salty tears that kept rolling through your cheeks.

“I know you love me, Y/N. I'm the King, I can perfectly have two wifes. Would you like that? Finally being with the man that you love,” he said.

It took you some time to understanding what he was suggesting but when you finally did it, you shoved him off.

You slammed him against the wall and pressed one of your new daggers on his neck.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” you asked with your jaw clenched.

“C'mon, drop this dagger. We're in the middle of the street,” he said.

“Do you really think that I'd be your second wife? That I'd call your stupid queen ‘sister’?” you yelled at his face.

“Okay, I got it. Now drop the fucking dagger,” he repeated.

“You know what? You're right,” you said giving him your prettiest smile.

You saw his eyes shinning with lust and happiness. He was really thinking that you'd accept be his second wife.

“I'm fucking with your brother. Gods, Hvitserk is the best man I could ask for. He makes me cum so many times in only one night, Ivar. And the things that he does with his tongue,” you said.

You saw the shine of his eyes disappear and he clenched his jaw.

“Do you really think that I'd leave him to be your second wife? Look at me Ivar, I'm the fiercest shieldmaiden you ever saw. I've killed so many times, I helped you to conquer things and territories and don't you dare try saying the opposite. I deserve more,” you said.

“Once you were what I wanted the most. I'd do anything for you, anything Ivar. But you fell for the first cunt that you saw. You're pathetic,” you continued.

“We used to be friends,” he said.

“Yes and what you did? Exactly. You started ignoring me. It was like I didn't exist for you. Do you have any idea of how much I suffered? No, of course you don't,” you said.

“Y/N, I-”

“SHUT THE FUCK UP!” You shouted. You took a long breath before continuing, “Now I moved on, and I'm so happy with your brother, Ivar. I love him. Gods, I love Hvitserk so much,” you said.

Actually, it was the first time you felt comfortable to say this but it was the truth. Finally you were feeling ready to tell exactly what your heart felt.

“And I'm asking you to not come after me again saying this kind of bullshit. Respect your brother's happiness. It's all I ask,” you said.

He only nodded and you took the dagger from his neck and when you gave the first step his words made you froze.

“I love you. You enormously stubborn pain in the ass,” he said.

“It's too late, I don't love you anymore. Actually I don't feel nothing else for you. It's like when it comes to you I'm an empty hole,” you said and started walking. This time he had no words for you.

Tags: @amour-quinn, @nothingeverdies, @ivarsshieldmadien, @mblaqgi, @ivarswickedqueen, @dangerousvikings, @laketaj24, @ivarslittlebadgirl, @cosmicalpaca99, @feistybaby, @tephi101, @rekdreams247, @jade770, @haliannej, @threewintersoldiers.

#ivar ragnarsson #ivar ragnarsson x reader #ivar the boneless #ivar the boneless x reader #ivar's heathen army #ivar imagine #ivar drabble #ivar x reader #vikings drabble #vikings imagine #700 followers celebration #mari writes #ivar smut

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lady-zombies · 7 years ago

Text

My final thoughts on Rupaul’s Drag Race All Stars 3 HEEENNNYYYYY

Hold on to you’re wigs children, it’s a long ride.

Morgan McMichaels-

I’ll admit it, I thought Morgan was a total bitch and I absolutely did not care for her.

HOWEVER, once she came back, and we got to see the other sides of her, I was like “wow, shame on me for completely and totally misjudging her”

Now I’m low key disappointed that she didn’t get more screen time

I would have loved to really see what she could bring

All in all I’m happy that she was able to get back into the spotlight and earn some hella respect from a whole new fan base ❤️

Thorgy Thor-

I absolutely love me some Thorgy Thor gurllll

I love how crazy and cucky she is, her whole vibe I totally dig it

I just wished she would believe in her self truly

I felt she spent so much time exerting so much energy into jealousy and paranoia that she didn’t really get a chance to shine for her true self.

All in all, I’ll always love me some Thorgy Thor and I can only hope that she’s able to see past her demons and become her best self ❤️❤️

Milk

Ohhh big and Milky gurlllll

I liked milk in her orginal season

I thought she was a weirdo in the best way and just totally misunderstood

That being that, I was a bit disappointed when she came in with her total holier than thou kind of thought process, which I totally called btw

Yes, you got to work with Marc Jacobs but that don’t make you the queen of England honeyyy

Tho on the other hand I think it’s never really a bad thing to be to confident in life

Milks confidence, tho it sometimes makes her head swell, will take her super far in life

Stay big, stay milky

Because honey I’m not lactose intolerant and I want alllll the Milk 🥛 🥛🥛🥛❤️❤️

Just you kno, chill sometimes 🙃

Chi Chi DeVayne-

Chi Chi is a precious baby who deserves to be protected at all cost

I love Chi Chi so much okay

It pained me to see her feel like she wasn’t up to par with the other queens

However i also admire her for her self realization that yeah, maybe she isn’t

But it’s all good baby because she had grown from her original season

And just like a beautiful blooming flower, she’s just gonna keep growing ❤️❤️🌸🌸

Sending any kind of hate her way is like stepping on puppies okay

Aja-

I am so proud of Aja okay

I think for having the smallest amount of time between seasons, she grew absolutely tremendously

I was neutral about her in her original season

But when she came back I was absolutely sold heeennnyyy I love me some Aja now

I truly wish she had been chosen to come back because I felt she had the best track record of the eliminated queens and had the most to offer

I highly expect her career to take off to the stars and I wish her all the best of luck❤️❤️❤️

I literally say “heyyy yo sissss” all the time now, thanks a lot Aja

BenDeLaCreme

Ohhhhh miss BenDeLa !!

I did not expect her to do as well as she did at all tbh

It actually kind shook me cause I was like ohh gurl if she keeps doing well, that means she’s gonna win

And that mean Trixies not gonna win...

I’m usually really good about avoiding spoilers but I totally seen that she was going to eliminate herself

I didn’t want to believe it but when I watched it, it was like I couldn’t really feel it cause it had been spoiled

However I do truly respect her for doing what she did

When it comes to confrontation DeLa is literally me

I hate it so much, it makes my skin crawl

If she wouldn’t have eliminated herself I think it’s obvious she would have won

All in all, DeLa is truly a pure soul in the world and doesn’t have a mean bone in her body. ❤️❤️

Bebe Zahara Benet

I didn’t really know how to feel about Bebe at first tbh

I had watched season 1 once like a long time ago

And honestly I was like okay... when she won

Now that she was back, I do truly see why she was picked to be the very first winner of Drag Race

Everything she does (except maybe choreography😅) she’s great at !

I did think she was a bit divalicious but who wouldn’t be in her position

I also love her love for her home country

It goes so well with her over all “brand” and what’s better than being absolutely proud of where you come from ?

Bebe is an embodiment if that

All in all, great well polished queen

And like she said heennyyy she’ll still always be the ORGINAL Rupaul’s Drag Race winner ❤️❤️❤️

Kennedy Davenport

Kennedy is a grumpy old man who just wants some lovin

I’ll be honest I felt like Kennedy was sort of a Roxy Andrews situation

There were many times where I felt she should have went home

However I can understand the struggles she’s had and in the end yes, I do truly believe she deserved a spot in the top 4

Top 2 ?? Ehhhhh, not at first I’ll be honest

But the more the eliminated queens and Kennedy herself talked about how all the other queens are basically so much more well out than she is, and how she kinda did need the win more than the other girls, the less mad I was

In the end I was like yeah, Kennedy does need this win, and even thou I am a die hard Trixie fan, I would have been absolutely 100% okay with Kennedy winning 🙌

I hope everyone gives her the proper love she deserves at DragCon as well as any other meet and greets

She is truly an amazing dancer, she paints a beautiful mug and she’s the kind of person who will tell you the truth, and the shit you need to hear even tho you don’t wanna hear it, you know what I mean Vern

I admire Kennedy and I wish her the best of luck in her career and life ❤️❤️❤️

Shangela

Like I said before, I am a die hard Trixie Mattel fan, like I would take a bullet for her

However.... I truly truly believe, Shangela was robbed and should have won !

I straight up thought she was gonna win !

You can clock my previous post about where I straight up say I think Shangela is going to win

And she damn well WOULD HAVE DESERVED THAT WIN!!

Shangela is the epiphany of a GLO UP !!!!

I remember the days where she was that kinda ratchet, not so polished, kinda short tempered, says whatever the hell she wants kind of queen and I’ll be honest, I did not care for her like at all

When season 3 came along I was like oh great, this bitch again

And I feel like that was the over all vibe she had in her drag race career

But nowwwww OHHH HONEEEYYY

I fucking love Shangela

I cannot describe how proud of her I truly am (word of the day: truly)

From the first episode when she came in, in her box and her cute little blue dress I was like I gurlll something is different about you in all the best ways

I can’t even describe how amazing her blossoming into a beautiful butterfly has been to experience

Shangela’s Drag is on point af now

She killed just about every challenge

I didn’t expect that

But I love it

I love Shangela

It killed me to see her reaction when she lost

She’s gonna go super far in life and I couldn’t be more excited for her ❤️❤️❤️

TRIXIE MATTEL

So apparently I ran out of text blocks so Trixie’s is going to be one long thing separated by... first of all OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG... I literally fucking cried when she won... I just about had a heart attack when she was pick for the 2nd queen... I really did not think she was going to win... but I couldn’t be happier what she did... Her as3 journey was an emotional roller coaster tbh... I thought this season was going to be kinda like season 2 how it seems like it was made for Alaska... I thought this season was going to be made for Trixie... it really thru me off when she didn’t start off so strong... I also felt bad because she would always talk about how she felt like she was letting her fans down... I wanted to do nothing but shower her with love but I didn’t even realize what kind of pressure was set on her... I was legit worried for a bit that she would be eliminated... and tbh when Ben went home, I was low key relieved because I was like there is now way Trixie is going to win with Ben out her slaying every challenge.... I don’t know what happened when she snapped out of it and finally brought it... but am I sure glad she did... obviously I think Trixie deserved to win, but I can still appreciate her fumbles and reasons on why LOTS of people are mad about it. But seriously, it’s just Drag !!! Just like anything else in the world, shit happens, and then we move on !!! Trixie is my queen, and I don’t know how that happened because all my life I’ve totally despised country music and basically any country folk stuff at all. Opposites attract heeennyyy...CONGRAULATIONS TO MY BOO, couldn’t be more happy and proud of you bb, I can only hope to be able to graze your presence at DragCon this year 💗💗💗💕💖💕💖💖💖💖💖💖💗 on a side note: I am just a simple 20 year old Bisexual girl from Colorado, and I just want to say, never in my life did I ever think that I would be so obsessed with (mostly)men in makeup. Please, please, please don’t send Trixie hate. Don’t send Morgan hate, don’t send Thorgy hate, don’t send Milk hate, don’t send Chi Chi don’t send Morgan hate, don’t send Aja hate, dont send Ben hate, don’t send Bebe hate, don’t send Kennedy hate. Drag race is this beautiful thing where all kinds of people can come together and enjoy and embrace their selves together as one. I love the LGTBQ community and it just absolutely blows my mind how quick things can get so ugly. All these queens make it a note to point out the importance of mental health, and I don’t understand why anyone in their minds would want to go to a specific queens page, be it Twitter, or Instagram or Facebook or whatever, and take time out of their day to write something with such intentions of making someone feel bad. It you have a negative thought about a specific queen, that’s cool, you’re totally obligated to have that, but believe it or not, you won’t explode or anything if you DONT post that rude ass comment. All the queens worked their asses off and it all payed off in different ways. Just be kind to each other people, because at the end of the day, it’s just drag and no matter what everyone’s lives will move on the next day. IDK I GOT KINDA RANTY Okay I’m done

#rupaul’s drag race #rupaul’s drag race all stars 3 #rpdr #rpdr all stars #all stars 3 #as3 #trixie mattel #morgan mcmichaels #thorgy thor #bendelacreme #kennedy davenport #shangela #milk #chi chi devayne #bebe zahara benet #aja #rpdras3 #my thoughts #sue me

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admirable-mairon · 7 years ago

Text

My thoughts on Fëanor-

-and false claims that piss me off

See, I have been wanting to just sit down and write things about Fëanor for so long now but I’ve never gotten around to actually doing it. What is the purpose of this? Well mainly as entertainment for my followers, but also to clear up some things that I keep seeing repeated over and over again, and oh how many posts I would reblog on here if only they didn’t take a cheap, unfunny jab at Fëanor - The character I love more than any other in any form of media ever.

I will unfortunately be unable to share actual quotes in this piece. I let my friend borrow my english copy of the Silmarillion and so I only have the swedish version here, which is admittedly HILARIOUS occassionally, but it means that if I have a quote - I will have to translate it for you, so it won’t be exact word for word.

I won’t be talking about the different texts and exact words, but rather misconceptions I’ve seen prodding around about him, and direct arguments I’ve seen come from different parts of the fandom. I see the majority of the Tolkien fandom as the gosh darn best people I’ve ever had the joy of stumbling upon - endless amounts of fan-pieces, whether it’s art, music or writing that never seem to go away. They just get better and better and I love you.

But like I said there are SEVERAL things that are always brought up falsely about Fëanor that I just can’t stand for, sort of like the criticism against Thranduil that ‘OH HE’S JUST A RACIST SHITHEAD AND HE’S WRONG’, when in truth he’s the only actually rational and sane character in the movies.

THAT is the type of things I will bring up here. Read on further if you think it might me amusing. If you decide not to I wish you a pleasant evening/morning/day :D

There are many things one might dislike about Fëanor - Hell one might simply not be interested in him? I have several characters that I couldn’t care less about for no better reason than ‘Meh I guess I just don’t?’.

One might dislike his arrogance - he’s the very definition of ‘Holier-than-thou’ in many ways, and his passion can be off-putting for many. Maybe the whole concept of ‘GREATEST OF THE ELDAR WAS HE’ pisses you off on a sheer principle? That’s all well and good - I dislike Galadriel for the same reason (though I would argue there is no basis to claiming that she’s the GREATEST in any way as she hasn’t really done anything worthy of mentioning, but I digress - that is not what I’m here for, and the malcontent I have with her is mainly because of petty arguments on tumblr).

HOWEVER.

When people lie about Fëanor to support their own dislike of him - I get downright pissed off.

To be more direct - Here are the things I will be discussing in this piece:

He was a bad Father / He ruined his children / He forced his children to swear the oath with him

He left His people to the Helcaraxë

He was to blame for all the kinslayings

There was nothing but fire and greed inside him

All of these are so-called critisisms I’ve seen directed towards him during my years on here. I have not seen many of them on here lately, but it is likely that that’s because I’ve made a point to unfollow and potentially block those who spew nonsense like this.

BUT LET’S ADRESS ALL OF THIS SHALL WE? STRAP IN Y’ALL AND GRAB A SNACK - I’M GOING IN DEEP

He was a bad Father / He ruined his children / He forced his children to swear the oath with him

Mostly inspired by things I keep hearing as well as an anonymous ask I recieved this morning

I love feanor too but he sort of brought tragedy on his children

*the heaviest sigh*

Okay. Just. Gimme a moment.

Okay no.

Here’s the thing: The Silmarillion is filled with questionable forms of parenting. There’s Finwë not understanding what had to be done to deal with Fëanor as a child, there’s Indis also lacking in that understanding, there’s parents that seem to give no shits about their children, hell I love Curufin and I do think he adored Celebrimbor more than anything, but he was a little too damaged to know how to handle him, not to mention the fact that a pair of Kinslayers were better parents than Elwing and Eärendil ever were.

But Fëanor wasn’t one of them. How do I know?

His sons would not have done everything they did unless they loved their father with every fibre of their being. They were not copies of him (aside from Curufin) and to me it seems clear that they were encouraged to follow their heart’s desires rather than strictly follow in his footsteps.

When Nerdanel left - or however that went over - ALL SEVEN OF THEM CHOSE THEIR FATHER. ALL OF THEM. ALL SEVEN.

When Fëanor was distraught and coing crazy with agony over losing his father and the Silmarilli - When he swore that oath - his sons wasted NO TIME in getting up to stand there with him.

They stuck with him through thick and thin, they didn’t hesitate to stand there with him and support him fully. They were a family - a close-knitted one at that - and they adored him. That much is clear.

Just because someone is a biological parent doesn’t earn them any form of respect as a parent, nor any love from their children if they haven’t deserved it. Fëanor was loved by his sons and he loved them dearly - He is one of the few parents in these damn series that deserve the title of ‘Actually great and supportive dad’.

Fëanor did not bring tragedy on his children - let’s all be very clear on that. If anything - tragedy was brought unprovoked onto him and his children, who - by the by - were grown men by the time they left Valinor and swore the Oath

Eru was completely alright with all of this. The Valar were cruel, whether they meant to be or not, and Fëanor was used by Melkor. The fëanorions wanted what was rightfully theirs - what their father and grandfather died for - and the whole world suddenly decided to say ‘Hah fuck no finders keepers shitheads!’.

It can naturally be argued that his death fucked them up, and that he shouldn’t have barged forward to take on Balrogs on his own, but TBH if it fucked over them that bad it only further supports the argument that he was an amazing father that they loved so dearly that they would do literally ANYTHING to get back and honor. Furthermore one could naturally point out that burning ships was a Rude AF thing to do, but to be fair every single one of his sons was in on it aside from Maedhros who suffered the loss of Fingon, but perhaps Fingon would still at least be safe and out of harm’s way in Valinor. Burning the ships was arguably and admittedly very ‘rude’, but it was not an ill action directed towards his people or most importantly his son.

Which brings us beautifully to the second subject....:

He left his people to the Helcaraxë

Except he really didn’t.

He left FINGOLFIN’S people - not his own. Seems minor and pointless perhaps, but I assure you it’s of great importance.

After the kinslaying at Alqualondë it was only natural that tensions would grow unbearable. When people break - when people do terrible things - they often regret them afterwards, become angry and need to find someone to blame it on. Given how Fëanor was their king and that he was the one who encouraged them to leave the cage the Valar had put them in, it would be natural to blame Fëanor for the horrendous act they’d all just committed. Because let me remind you - The Nolofinwëans ALSO took part in the first kinslaying.

Fingolfin’s people had long been - for a lack of a better word - talked shit about Fëanor and his people. Ever since Finwë died and they left the safety of their cage, there had been constant nagging about how Fëanor shouldn’t be their king, how he didn’t deserve it, why did they have to do this, it was too far away, this was going too far by now, Fingolfin should lead instead. And Fëanor - Never having been one for taking anyone’s shit - basically said ‘Oh okay then you can WALK BACK HOME YOU PIECES OF SHIT WE’RE GOING TO MIDDLE-EARTH AND YOU CAN STAY BACK COMFORTABLY HERE’.

FINGOLFIN was the one to insist they cross the Helcaraxë, along with his people. There was the option of returning back to Valinor, which I assume Fëanor would assume that they would do, because after all that’s what they had been complaining about for weeks, wasn’t it? Believe me - I love Fingolfin - and it was an asshole move to burn the ships. But Fëanor didn’t leave his own people to the Helcaraxë - He left Fingolfin and his people to do whatever they wished (as long as it didn’t involved the ships they’d killed for), and they chose to walk along the Helcaraxë.

Did they have much of a choice? Could they return or was it more of a 50-shades kind of situation of ‘OH BUT SHE COULD LEAVE WHENEVER SHE WANTED but really she couldn’t’? Finarfin returned just fine, but then again he hadn’t killed any teleri.

That whole part can certainly be discussed and argued about, but the fact remains that Fëanor did NOT leave his own people to the Helcaraxë - He left Fingolfin’s. The dramatic noldor flare version of ‘IF YOU DON’T STOP COMPLAINING I’LL TURN THIS THING AROUND AND YOU ALL CAN WALK HOME’

He was to blame for all the kinslayings

This is - as we all can see - A clear and obvious fucking lie.

Fëanor died before the sun was created. Fëanor died at the very beginning of the First Age.

He was literally not alive long enough to be blamed for any of the other kinslayings.

He created the silmarillis - he and his sons had the only right to them.

The kinslayings post Alqualondë happened because of incompetent leadership, corruption and betrayals within the good ol’ people of Middle-Earth. Need I mention that the only Fëanorion killed by Melkor’s forces was Fëanor himself? The rest were killed by other elves. Not only that but the fëanorions were known to be diplomats - the strongest war-forces out there to be sure, and warlords for the legends - but the Union of Maedhros wasn’t their fault. The fact that Thingol fucked up and told a human to fetch a Silmaril because this human couldn’t understand a simple metaphor for ‘I will never let you marry my daughter’. Sort of ‘I will let you marry my daughter when Hell freezes over’, and he’d take that seriously? Not that I doubt it - Beren seems like the kind of fella who would barge into Hell with buckets of ice because ‘I WILL BE ALLOWED TO SHAG THE FEMALE ELF IF I DO THIS’.

Wars and conflicts such as the ones that raged through the First Age are NEVER black and white. Never. There is no good guy and there is no bad guy (aside from Melkor, but he wasn’t the ONLY bad guy). There were the Fëanorions and their property, and people who thought that they had the right to them.

Overall bad leadership and simple stupidity as well as over-dramatic elves and kings and humans were to blame for the Kinslayings: Not Fëanor.

That would be like blaming the one who made my phone in case it’d get stolen. “OH IF ONLY YOU HADN’T MADE THIS PHONE THIS WOULDN’T HAVE HAPPENED”

There was nothing but fire and greed inside him

I saw this written in that one post about why Galadriel giving Gimli three strands of her hair was an amazing scene (which it was because that move was SAVAGE).

This is the only place in which I will quote something word for word in this:

“Even when she was young, Galadriel’s ability to see into other’s hearts was very strong, and she knew that Fëanor was filled with nothing but fire and greed”

*muffled shrieking*

ALRIGHT SO LET’S HAVE A LOOK SHALL WE

To be fair - Galadriel is a child of Indis. That is not to say that Indis herself was bad (even though I literally hold no love for her whatsoever, aside from the fact that she gave us great characters through that womb of hers - good job), but rather that Finwë’s family was very heavily divided and separated by an understandable conflict.

Fëanor - understandably - hates that side of the family. Because of that, because they’ve never been given a chance because they aren’t worth his time - it’s natural that they dislike him in turn.

Galadriel is Finarfin’s child, but acts more like a Noldo than he does. It would be LOGICAL for her to be biased against him. Because of that it wouldn’t be surprising if she saw the passion in him and interpreted it as Fire and Greed because of bias - whether she was aware of it or not.

Fëanor was indeed the greatest elf that has ever existed and ever will exist - greatest in both beauty, mind and strength. He did ask for her hair three times because he wanted to capture it's beauty in gems, but that they inspired the silmarilli? Really? Nah. It might have driven him to create them out of spite, but we have a pretty clear case of stroking Galadriel's ego to deal with here if we are to assume that the SILMARILLI - the very gems that caused most of the tragedy during the First Age - were crafted in her image.

But more than that the phrase "she saw that in his heart there was only fire and greed" pisses me off.

No. There was not. There was passion in his heart. Fëanor lived to create - especially things of beauty. Everything - literally everything about this cocky little shit was about passion and creation. He cared for his people - he wanted to share wonders with the world freely and out of the rule of the Valar/Gods. He wanted freedom and he wanted to create, he has three times too much energy in his soul.

If that is what they mean by "only fire and greed", then yes.

All in all this has been amusing and interesting to write and I hope I’ve made at least some lick of sense to you - the reader.

This was really just a long and complicated way of saying that it is OKAY to dislike a character. Not every character appeals to everyone. There is legit nothing wrong with that.

But I lose respect for people - grownups - who can’t even admit that their reason for disliking someone or something is petty. I cannot respect people who go far enough that they end up lying and making things up just to make themselves seem more sensible and mature, when in all seriousness all it tells me is that someone lacks the self-confidence to admit that ‘Yeah. I like this thing but not that. There’s no reason really, I just thing this thing is neat and that one isn’t because I’m a petty asshat’.

No character - Especially not in a masterpiece like The Silmarillion has perfect characters, only ones with different grey areas in what’s okay and what isn’t. There is nothing wrong in liking some and disliking some. But OWN that. if the reason is petty OWN it. Try to have at least some semblence of confidence and insight to know when you’re being petty and when you aren’t.

We’re a great fandom - I truly and utterly believe that.

I love you

( @first-son-of-finwe )

#feanor #the silmarillion #musings #meta #really #just #me talking too much about a character I adore

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thelillykane · 7 years ago

Note

for the salty ask meme #6 #1 #4 #5 and #12 Just pour all the salt, jennie!

oh my god i just refound this in my ask box so sit tight i’m gonna try & answer real quick~~~

1. What OTPs in your fandom(s) do you just not get? + 4. Do you have a NoTP in your fandom? Are they a popular OTP?

as always, the answer is l*cas and p*yton like!!! it doesn’t make sense to me AT ALL how people ship this couple and consider them to be like soulmates when l*cas spends half of season one, all of seasons 2 & 3, half of season four, and the majority of season five being blatantly and vocally in love with other women* (mostly brooke but then in season five he’s literally engaged to and planning to marry lindsay and um friendly reminder kids that he’s not the one that calls off the wedding!!! he’s not at the altar going “yeah i love p*yton” he’s literally…devastated when lindsay leaves him and he even tries to win her back but like sure ok i guess he loves p*yton)

also, like…p*yton literally only wants to date him the second he becomes unavailable which isn’t even me being mean it’s just the goddamn truth!! he wants to date her in s1, she isn’t interested, and then he starts to move on (and she finds out brooke has a crush on him let’s sip that fucking tea together) and she decides she wants him!!!. and then she does the same thing in season five when he asks her to marry her and she says no so he?? moves on like anyone who got rejected would do and THAT’S WHEN SHE FLIPS HER SHIT and is like “oh well when you were eighteen-twenty you wrote a book where you promised to love me forever so you can’t get engaged to someone else even though yeah i started dating julian like a week after i said no to you”

and tHEN when they weren’t pissing me off on screen by treating everyone (brooke) like trash they were boring!!! like how tf

ALSO LISTEN the fact that not only does the show do a 180 and be like “oh lol l*cas always loved her even when he literally was repulsed by the mention of still having feelings for her” BUT THEY ALWAYS TRY TO PRETEND LIKE EVERYONE ELSE IN TREE HILL WAS WAITING FOR THEM TO BE TOGETHER AND NO ONE WAS haley – l*cas’ best friend!!!! – is vocally against them being together on like 3 fucking occasions minimum, nathan is 100189001 team brooke penelope davis, karen & keith – lucas’ PARENTS – actually take the time to get to know brooke and end up rooting for her and her happiness both individually and w/ their son and they never bother to do that w/ p*yton, skills literally calls l*cas out on his behavior and calls p*yton out on hers (re: them being shitty af) but then two eps later is all ~lol i was a fan~ when he clearly wasn’t, i could fucking go on but you see my point like…no one wanted them to be together including them

the way they treat brooke formerly gets its own bullet point because oh my god even thinking about it makes my blood boil like 98% of the time i’m fucking i’m pissed

also re: them being ~soulmates~ and they ~were meant to be together from ep 1**~ hilarie burton, who plays p*yton, literally came out in an interview this year and said that they never intended, to her knowledge, as the actress PLAYING P*YTON!!, for l*yton to end up together but that the show switched gears around season four iirc (because sophia bush wasn’t super comfortable filming endless romantic shit with her ex husband who had cheated on her which i support fully)

ALSO i could be wrong but like….i’m pretty sure l*cas kisses brooke in every season he’s a main in (the s6 is a fakeout flash forward in which he lowkey envisions himself marrying brooke and lemme tell you that sure doesn’t seem like he’s super committed to p*yton) and you can’t say the same for him and p*yton (again i might be wrong but i don’t think they kiss in season 2) and they only kiss in season 3 because peyton thinks she’s gonna die and he’s sitting right there

^ the above is arguably the pettiest bullet point on here but i don’t give a FUCK i hate this fictional couple with every atom i possess

FUCK !!!! LISTEN that stupid “you’re always saving me thing” that p*yton says to him and it’s supposed to be romantic like lol he literally didn’t even go into the school for her that day!!! like sure once he’s in there he ends up saving her but that isn’t even what he wanted to do!!! he goes into the school to try and get nathan and to make sure nathan doesn’t get hurt!! when brooke is sobbing telling him she lost track of p*yton when she was getting out of the building l*cas doesn’t get all White Knight and go in to save her he literally was gonna stay with brooke!!! who he loves!!! (there’s an instance similar to this in season one where he only ~saves~ her because he is like…around when brooke is trying to get help for p*yton and probably others too but that’s the BIG one)

ALSO OH MY GOD in season 3 when they make p*yton realize she loves l*ke again they do it in the dumbest way??? she’s literally…with j*ke and she is asleep and mumbles l*kes name and then j*ke is like “u said his name in ur sleep u don’t want to be with me” and dumps her while she’s crying and saying she flat out doesn’t love l*cas (but then she has no one else so she’s like lol what the heck i guess i will love him romantically)

and btw that^ is another instance where it wasn’t p*yton choosing to be with l*cas it was literally someone deciding NOT to be with her…which come to think of it is how they always get together? like?? they never choose to be with one another except in season one after they fucking cheat on brooke like dirtbags and then l*ke dumps brooke to be with p*yton but after that they literally..only pick each other as last resorts because they have no one else. like lmao!!! that is not my idea of grand romance otp it’s literally…sad in the pathetic, embarrassing way

*idr season six that well but i am willing to bet he does it a little bit during this season as well (also from what i remember they literally…stopped writing scenes w/ him and brooke one on one together because they knew the audience would take one look at those scenes and KNOW he still loved her and not p*yton)

also um brooke/lucas parallel nathan/haley so much so it’s just so fake whenever people try and say they weren’t the intended endgame for a while there like…look at the parallels. open your eyes.

anyway y’all i could probably keep going i am the most bitter and angry about them always and there’s literally 200+ things that are just ??? about them it’s Too Easy

oh also fandom jumo but uh piper/l*o from charmed are boring as shit they’re okay in s1-2 and after that i was like hey can we get him off my screen thanks

5. Has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you?

I don’t think “ruined” is the right term, but there are definitely some ships that I saw overhyped imo and then when I watched the show I was…underwhelmed. (I’m referring specifically to Ch*ck/S*rah when I type this because the never ending will they-won’t they was just fucking exhausting and by season 3 – which is where i am currently on hiatus – when they actually got together i just could not bring myself to care) (also she can do better and deserves better and season 3 chuck is like the worst version of him so far but)

6. Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?

not to my knowledge!

12. Is there an unpopular arc that you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why?

i was just talking about this the other day with amanda!! (i would normally tag her but she loves l*yton and i respect that so i’m not gonna make her see the seven paragraphs in which i Destroy them)

essentially we talked about how everyone needs to back up off of season three of veronica mars. like, sure, compared to seasons one and two it’s not as good, but even those seasons have stuff i don’t like such as: gross rape plots, needless and unwelcome attempts at love triangles, sidelining of POC characters for ?? reasons (it’s racism y’all, that’s the reason), sidelining of female characters for White Male Development (re: Mac not becoming a regular that season while Dick & Cassidy both did), etc. and all of those reasons are the big reasons why people shit on season three but [dennis reynolds voice] newsflash asshole! it was there the entire goddamn time

^to continue the above, i think season three has SO MANY POSITIVES AS WELL for example: logan canonically tells veronica mars that he loves her. um. that’s Good Shit. also!!!: parker lee is there, weevil working w/ keith mars for a bit, logan and veronica making out on the stairs to fidelity by regina spektor, holy fuck does veronica mars love logan echolls so much, THAT SCENE WHEN LOGAN APOLOGIZES TO VERONICA AGAIN!!, BEATS UP GORY SORKIN BECAUSE HE’S RUDE AF TO VERONICA, SHRUGS WHEN GORY THREATENS HIS LIFE, IMMEDIATELY GOES AND APOLOGIZES TO PIZ, AND THEN VERONICA WATCHES HIM WALK AWAY BEAMING WITH HEARTS IN HER EYES LIKE THAT SCENE IS IN SEASON THREE YOU GUYS IT’S RIGHT THERE and then like!!! there’s quality eps in there that i love with my whole heart~~ wichita linebacker!!! poughkeepsie tramps and thieves!!! postgame mortem!!! charlie don’t surf!!!

in summary: like…yeah parts of it were geuninely awful. just..like….the rest of the seasons. and the movie. which is like.. another Thing

also fandom jump again but uh Rory’s decision to leave Yale in season six was absolutely the right one for her to make and Lorelai is the fucking worst about it. and if Lorelai hadn’t overreacted and ostracized Rory over it Rory would’ve gone back to Yale and lot sooner and that’s what you missed on Glee

#cariebishop #jennie interacts with people #anti leyton #buffys #victoria pls come drag l*yton w me #don't look amanda

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mysplaced-pen · 7 years ago

Photo

hey there, @aurelche ! Of course I can, love! °\(^▿^)/° thank you for stopping by and trusting me with this request, wowie! and thank you for liking my blog!! I hope you like what I write for this idea! i wanted to keep these together, so i just made a separate post heh ^^;

this is some sensitive stuff, so be warned! it also might have gotten pretty long…esp zen’s since that was the first one i did;; [tw: sexual advances, abusive relationships, violence, language]

MC had told them multiple times already. There was no way she was going to have sex with them, not before marriage. “But we’ve been dating for three years, MC.” They had said, “You have to do it with me…you love me, right?” But MC stood her ground. Even when things took a turn for the worse when they slapped her once. “Oh no, I’m so sorry babe,” They said. “I won’t do that again, but..please, just once MC.” The answer was no. Even when they asked again. And they was going to slap her again, too, she could tell. But she managed to excuse herself long enough to make a call..

zen

when he got a call from mc asking for help, he had a feeling it was because of her boyfriend

mc told him about him pressuring her, making sexual advances when she clearly told him where she stood

so zen was on his way over, mc gave him a spare key to their place, so he uses it

when he first got that, he was so ecstatic

mc’s bf is Confused, but zen wastes no time.

“what makes you think you have the right to mc? that you can just have her when you want? why can’t you respect her decision and wait? is your dick going to fall off if you don’t get laid? no. you got hands, buddy. use them.” im yelling i just wrote that omg

both mc and her bf is Shook

right now, all mc’s boyfriend can really say is, “it’s been three years-”

“i don’t give a damn how many years it’s been! if you really wanted mc, and really appreciated her, you would’ve proposed! but all you want is sex, apparently. you don’t deserve mc.”

mc is literally just standing there, looking at zen like she’s never seen him before because his words hit her hard

it’s quiet, but mc finally speaks. “you should go. zen, you stay.”

her bf is like ??? but mc is like, “we’re over. leave my house.”

he’s about to protest, but mc yells “now!” and zen looks like he’s gonna punch him, so he leaves

“mc..?” zen asks. “do you really mean that?” she asks

“of course.” an immediate answer. “you deserve that and so much more..” he feels like he minus well. “something that i’d work to give you..”

mc smiles and walks over to peck his lips. “i don’t doubt that you would”

yoosung

he gets the call in the middle of a LOLOL round, which he’d been playing more often to avoid his crush on mc

but he drops everything to help them

goes over to mc’s place and finds her just about to be slapped by her bf

he manages to get in between them on time so that he gets slapped

mc gasps and stands up, going to help him, but yoosung holds her back

“don’t you dare lay a hand on mc” he says. her bf scoffs, “or what?”

he’s about to hit yoosung again, but somehow yoosung avoids it and hits him instead

“or two things. I make you leave,” yoosung pushes him towards the door. “then I steal your girl.” he pushes him again

mc has never seen yoosung like this..and did he just say that?

mc’s bf scoffs again, trying to play it cool. “fine, have her. not like she’s gonna give you any, anyways.” and he literally just leaves

wow what an asshole

mc stares at the door, surprised and confused yoosung looks at the door and then back at mc

this is awkward..

“i guess im single now” mc says. “that- is not what i meant to do” “no..you wanted to steal me from him, right?”

“no, mc- you’re your own person-” “yoosung. don’t ever do what he did to me, okay?” he nods “now let’s check your face..”

jaehee

did not need any further info, she just headed over

honestly, she never liked mc’s girlfriend anyways because of her crush

but this was ridiculous

so jaehee goes over and sees mc backed against the wall, her gf trying to make a move on her

jaehee pulls mc’s gf back by her shoulders and steps in front of mc to protect her

“you need to leave” she says. “no I don’t, we’re dating.” jaehee huffs

“not anymore. and if you want to continue saying that you’re dating, i’ll release evidence of sexual harassment. your choice.”

mc’s now ex skedaddles out of there, scared af

jaehee now turns to mc and cups her cheek

“i’m sorry, did she hurt you?” “no..but thank you…I..that was a lot”

she nods and leads mc to the couch, making her sit and kissing her forehead before she goes to make tea

when she comes back, mc asks, “do you think i’m weird…for wanting to wait?” “of course not. you have the right to your body. no one else can tell you that. I know I would be satisfied with just kissing and cuddling you until marriage”

oh shit

“…jaehee?” “if- we dated, of course.” she tries to clear up

“I mean…that sounds like a nice idea..”

jumin

i kinda like what happened in my other abusive relationship hc, but let me expand on it

that’s what eventually happens, first, mc has to tell jumin about the downside

their relationship was going well

mc even thought he was going to propose

but he got drunk one night and attempted to get in bed with mc

this happened quite often now, though

and she told him there was no way

mc told jumin for a while and then stopped, so he assumed everything was resolved

turns out, it was because he had hit mc

and when he came to the penthouse, he also hit jumin

so now its really fair

he males mc stay after the meeting

“you stopped telling me.” “i was scared..”

he pulls her into a hug

“you don’t have to be scared with me” “…i know, thank you jumin”

707 / luciel / saeyoung

is there in a flash

also has on his Angsty Attitude

he just walks through the door and takes his place besides mc

“listen here.” he says, a smile still on his face

“see this?” he holds up a flash drive. “i have the power to ruin your life in two minutes. is it really worth a round in bed?”

mc’s bf doesn’t believe him, so saeyoung starts spitting out the most random facts about him to spook him

it worked

“…fine. what do you want.” mc’s bf asks

“i want you gone. never bother mc again. and never let me see you again.”

he bolts

saeyoung then turns to mc and puts the flash drive in his pocket “are you alright?”

she nods, pulling him over. “guess he wasn’t the one”

he smiles a bit. “no, but lets go ruin his life.”

“saeyoung!” “what? he deserves it. you’re too perfect for him. for anyone. for me.” oops that slipped

“i’m not perfect..” “….and i’m not that good of a person. wanna date?” “yeah.’

v / jihyun

say no more

this man is over there

knocks on the door like a gentleman

gets a very rude answering, but he smiles politely

“if you touch mc inappropriately without her consent, I will ruin you” :)

what

“or better yet, she’s coming with me. you clearly don’t respect boundaries or the preferences of others, including those you claim you love.”

he walks in and takes mc by the hand, walking back out

but before they leave, v has one more statement

“you lost the best thing in your life because you can’t keep it in your pants. i’ll be sure to thank you at our wedding” :))

i love savage v

mc is just as surprised

they get to his house and mc’s just like “…wedding?”

and now he’s super blushy and tries to wave it off “oh, you know…you say things..”

“how about we date for a bit first?”

saeran

my asexual bean is having none of it

he literally storms over and is so mad

punches mc’s bf when he starts badmouthing him and mc

“you can’t wait? until marriage? i don’t see why not, you’ve waited this long already. i don’t see why you’re so anxious to get your first time over with”

he keeps at this roasting session for a while

like a solid 8 minutes

it ends with mc kicking their ex out, who looks like he might cry

saeran pulls mc into a hug

“he was ridiculous. i’m sorry you had to deal with such a dick.”

mc says it’s okay, but she’s happy he’s gone

saeran and her have a talk about sex, actually

they discuss how sex isn’t everything to a relationship and that connection is more important

“kind of like..our connection.” saeran says and then he shuts up

mc just smiles at him and kisses her fingers then pressing them to his shoulder

“i like it this way better…” “so do i…” saeran says

whoops mc is also ace wowie

#mystic messenger #mysme #mystic messenger hc #mysme headcanon #zen mysme #yoosung kim #jaehee kang #jumin han #707 #saeyoung choi #v #jihyun kim #saeran choi #a request!#aurelche #ams has rambled #an angst mess ahead!#this got progressively worse but im sleepy

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sweetnestor · 8 years ago

Text

Story of Another Us | Week 4

university au, platonic af, now on ao3!

previous chapter

Take this heart, put yourself in it

“I can’t believe I’ve been here for a whole month!” said Jack in a video I was watching. “I still feel like I’m visiting! I feel like I’m on holiday or that I’m leaving tomorrow! I mean, I’ll leave in May when the university shuts down, but anyway, I like it here in California! That’s mostly because Mark offered me his house, and Bella - uh, Mark’s girlfriend - offered her’s too! I basically sleep at Mark’s and record at Bella’s! They’ve been so generous and kind and I’m so grateful!”

This was probably why his community was so nice. Here he was, so giddy, positive, and excited. It reflects with his audience. I admired the mutual respect. It was something that was hardly seen these days. The more I watched his videos, the more I hung out with him in person… the better I wanted to be. I almost wished I was as extroverted as he was. He looked really happy, and I almost envied him for that.

Normally, these kinds of people would make me angry or depressed. Jack wasn’t exactly an exception. I was more depressed than angry at him. Or, envious, as I said. He was so good at getting along with other people. Everyday at uni he was talking to different people. He was better friends with Sophie, and he’s known her for almost a month! I’ve known her for two years! It wasn’t just that he was a well known YouTuber, it was in his personality, mannerisms, and the fact that he was kind to every person he came across.

And then there’s me. I was always quiet. I was always giving one word answers. No eye contact, always on my phone, keeping to myself. People thought I was rude. No one ever said it, but judging from past experiences, people frequently mistook social anxiety for impoliteness. Along with being a beauty guru, people thought I was stuck up as well, that because I had sharp eyeliner and good eyebrows it automatically meant that I thought I was superior. It was quite the opposite, but hardly anyone stuck around to discover that. The only people that did stick around were Mark and Jack. Even then, I didn’t understand how they dealt with me.

Even when Jack’s birthday came around in early February, I couldn’t bring myself to celebrate. We all surprised him with a cake and a trip to Disneyland. I stuck around for cake (with great, hand trembling difficulty), but then I caught a bug. No, seriously. I have faked an illness to get out of things in the past, but eventually my anxiety just made me sick to my stomach regardless. I spent the rest of the day leaning over the toilet. Mark wanted to skip Disney and stay with me, but I made Jack, Matt, and Ryan drag him out the door. He didn’t deserve to be around my mess.

Despite that, I tried to be a little likeable, but it felt like everyone was tired of me. I was just taking up space. Everyone pitied me. Why was I even here?

That was the question of the day. Why? Got out of bed. Why? I don’t know. Class, I guess. Went to put on makeup. Why bother? Excellent question. I left my appearance as it was. Went to eat breakfast. Why? You ate too much yesterday. Good point. Thank god Mark was at a meeting. He couldn’t be here to make me eat.

It was easy to hide my bad days each time they came around. Mark was busy each time, so he hardly noticed. We never properly saw each other until the late evening when I was basically over it. I couldn’t exactly explain my bad moods either. I almost never had a reason to be so down in the dumps when this happened, and Mark would always look for a how and a why. I just wanted to be held and told it was okay to be sad for no reason.

Well, technically, I had a reason now. He was sitting in the living room, waiting for me to take him to school. How could I explain that? “I’m depressed because of Jack’s happiness.” God, how awful could I be?

“Ready?” I called as I walked down the stairs. “Jack?”

“Yeah!” he called back, then I heard footsteps through the house. “You ready for the exam?” he asked when he found me.

“Shit, that’s today,” I said in realization. “Whatever. Let’s just get it overwith.”

“You didn’t print the study guide or anything?” he asked.

I shook my head. “I don’t study.”

“I’ll help you on the way!”

I wish I could say the test was the hardest part of the day. In fact, it was the easiest part. I finished within thirty minutes, Jack following not long after.

There were more people on campus than usual. Figured it was normally like that since we were out of class earlier than usual. Quite a number of them were the ‘popular’ YouTubers, so naturally I kept my head down, unable to look at any of them. A couple of them greeted Jack, to which he responded. When they were gone he would tell me how happy he was that they recognized him.

That wasn’t the hard part. The most unexpected thing happened when we stepped out of the main office.

Paparazzi.

“What the fuck?” Jack said in shock.

It wasn’t even a lot of people. Maybe ten to twelve. I knew they weren’t here for either of us, but they were snapping pictures anyway. I felt trapped, my chest began to tighten. I didn’t know what to do except grab Jack’s wrist as a clutch.

“Come on,” he told me, hooking our arms together.

He practically pulled me through the small crowd, and we discovered that not only were there paparazzi, but YouTube fans as well. Some called for Jack, but he didn’t stop for them. The only thing I could think of was how much they were going to hate me for keeping him away. Well, that, and the fact that I was probably dying. I started crying.

“Bella, Bellers, where are you car keys?” Jack asked me, his voice in a tone I had never heard before.

With shaking hands, I reached to one of the side pockets on my backpack. Jack helped me pull them out and he unlocked the car, telling me to go in the backseat.

“Are you okay?” he asked, sliding in next to me. “What are you feeling right now?”

“I feel like I’m going to die,” I said, my voice trembling.

“You’re not going to die,” he reassured. “It’s just a panic attack. It’s okay, you’ve had this before. Do you need anything?”

The sweet mercy of death so I don’t have to deal with this shit anymore. Just let this one kill me…

“Can you take a deep breath for me?” Jack asked gently. “Just a small one, as best you can.”

He breathed in with me. It was only slightly longer than my hyperventilating.

“See, you’re doing good. One more, a little deeper this time.”

He kept at it, his voice steady, keeping a good distance between us and then moving closer when I was calmer. I was still anxious and crying. I was uncomfortable because of the paparazzi invading my personal space, I was generally sad because of stupid depression, and I was mortified that I was having a meltdown in front of Jack. There was nothing more embarrassing than when I would have a panic attack in front of people. Anyone who was normal would just laugh it off and get over it. When my heart rate went down, I was still crying. Why couldn’t I just be normal?

“What are you wearing on your face?” Jack asked me after moments of silence.

I finally looked up at him, puzzled. “W-What?”

“Are you wearing makeup?”

“N-No…” Thank god too. It would have been all over my face.

“What’s your favorite makeup product?” he tried again.

I was still confused. “Um… eyeshadow. Or liquid lipstick.”

“What’s liquid lipstick? Is it the same as regular lipstick?”

I knew what he was doing. Trying to distract me from the panic and sadness, slowly guiding me away from it. Mark would always do this with me. It usually worked.

“It goes on like a gloss,” I replied. “Then it dries and stays matte. Classic lipstick stays glossy and shiny.”

“What about eyeliner? How do you do that big wing?” Jack wondered. “My girlfriend always does her’s big and pointed.”

“It’s an acquired skill. If I had my eyeliner right now, I’d show you. I’ve done wings for many years, and I still struggle with it.”

“No, you always look good. Always on fleek, fam!” The last bit sounded very exaggerated, and it made me laugh a little.

“Thanks.” I suppose.

“How’re you feeling now?”

“Better. Thank you, and sorry for… being a mess.”

“You don’t have to apologize. You’re my friend, I care about you, Bellers. Are you ready to go home?”

I nodded. “Yes.”

I’m his friend? He cares? He doesn’t hate me? That was surprising.

Ever since then, I felt much more comfortable around Jack. Who knew having a panic attack would bring two people together? Don’t get me wrong, I was a little embarrassed that I completely broke down in front of him, but once that passed, I was much more relaxed.

Mark was really pleased to know that Jack was able to help me through a panic attack. He didn’t tell me upfront, but I knew they must have talked about it when I wasn’t around. They probably talked about how much help I needed, and how I didn’t have any friends. I only knew that because I overheard Mark saying things like that in the past. But it was true, and I never resented him for that. I did need help sometimes, and I really didn’t have friends. Mark and now Jack were probably the only people I had.

_______

next chapter

#jacksepticeye fanfiction #markiplier fanfiction #jacksepticeye x reader #jacksepticeye x oc #markiplier x oc #sweetheart writes #soau

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bangtansavedme · 8 years ago

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If BTS was a reality show pt6

Jungkook:/playing video games with Yugyeom and Bambam when the doorbell rings/

Jinyoung: /runs out the kitchen and goes and opens the door/

Namjin:/ worried af/

Jinyoung: ooh Jin..Namjoon..what brings you here?

Jin: Where is my baby? Has he eaten? Has he had his bath yet?

Jinyoung: Um…yeah?

Jaebum:/happy af cause jungkooks ass is leaving/ Babe don’t be rude ..Guys come in/ makes way for them to come inside/

Jin: KOOOOOOKIE /runs over to him/

Jungkook:/rubs his face furiously as he sighs/ DAMN IT…

Jin:/ picks him up hugging him / Mines

Jungkook: You know the whole concept of running away is to never see you again…that’s the point

Namjoon:/pats Jaebum on the back/ Thank you so much for calling we were really worried

Jungkook: WAIT YOU CALLED THEM?!

Jaebum: / in the confession booth/ Hell to the yeah I called them. I already have too many kids to look after and asses to beat I do not have time to babysit a teenage runaway

Bambam:/dabs out of anger/ Not cool

Yugyeom: NOOOO he can’t leave we didn’t even get to go bowling yet

Jungkook: / thinks of other places he could go/ Suho hyung seems pretty nice..but do I really want to hear Sehun hyung talk about vivi

Jin: Child of mine you know I can hear you

Jungkook:/pouts as he tries to get out of Jin’s strong iron grip/

Jinyoung: How about you guys stay for dinner huh?

Jin: Sure why not /carries kookie as he walks into the kitchen/

Jaebum: Namjoon do you want for your son to respect you and Jin?

Namjoon: /nods/ Yes ..I only wish I knew how to get him to listen to us

Jaebum: An ass whooping is the answer to all your problems and worries

Namjoon:/chokes/ The hell Jaebum

Jaebum: Look I know it sounds extreme..but honestly his ass needs to be beat..He talks back to you...and ran away from home…that deserves some type type of discipline

Namjoon:/in the confession booth/ You know the more I listened to Jaebum the more I started to realize how easy we’ve been on kookie..Hell Jin has never disciplined him..Maybe Jaebum’s right..its time for us to put our foot down

Jinyoung: So guess who called me earlier /cooking dinner/

Jin:/playing with kookies hair/ hmm I don’t know..who?

Jinyoung: /sighs/ Suho..he called me during another one of his drunken episodes

Jin; Oh no..not again

Jinyoung:/nods as he sets the table/ He thought that his husband went missing cause he wouldn’t answer his calls nor come home

Jungkook:/gave up and is just going with the flow/

Jinyoung: Then I had to explain to him that his husband hasn’t been home in 2 years and is now a big actor in china

Jin: And what did he say after that?

Jinyoung:/shrugs/ Don’t know, I couldn’t understand due to all the screaming and crying so I hung up…BOYS DINNER IS READY

Yugyeom:/drags bambam with him to the table/

Jaebum: If you discipline him ..then maybe..just maybe he’ll come out like my boy Youngjae…I swear he makes me so proud with his purity ..He is too good for this world I tell you

Namjoon:/listens as he sits at the table/

Jin: /feeding Jungkook/

Namjoon: /in the confession booth/ Whenever we get home i’m gonna set some rules and show Jungkook who’s in charge around here..you just wait til I’m through with him…He’ll be as quiet as a mouse and as obedient as a dog

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millennialinmanhattan · 8 years ago

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Girls you know you better watch out. Some guys, some guys are only about that thing, that thing, that thing

Sorry I’ve been MIA y’all. I’ve been busy going on terrible dates and getting lied to by stupid fuckboys. I mean, I was gonna write about this hella funny story a coworker told me, how she went through a fat boy phrase in college and one night while she was on top she noticed that the guy kept stretching his arm out and scratching his face. She at first thought he was stretching but then it really started to get to her so she stopped and turned on the light. This MF was eating cake. I LITERALLY COULDN’T MAKE THIS SHIT UP. So my coworker being the down ass chick she is, she went with it, kept going and he fed her cake. #Badass

Anyways back to my dating stories, since I apparently have been getting a lot of “have you updated your blog?” “So what happened with you and diplomat” “Did you go on a date with Mergers & Acquisition”. blah blah blah

Betches, get excited because I just drank glasses or rosé and I’m mad AF. Sit down and put on your seatbelt, because it’s gonna be one hell of a ride, because my love life is f-u-c-k-e-d.

Yes, I went on a date with mergers & acquisition. Just drinks (God forbid he takes a girl out to dinner and drinks). Because he clearly relies on his looks and his $245K paycheck. Yup, I looked that shit up on glassdoor. I mean you have no soul to do that job so you must make a shitton of money. Was he cute? Yeah. Was he intelligent? I mean he tried too hard IMO. Was he cocky? OMG EYE ROLL. He was pretty straight forward and was like I’m not looking for anything serious. So I got the prettiest cocktails and peaced out.

Next fuckboy on the list. Diplomat. I mean I thought we were done. I saw a psychic she told me he wasn’t for me and that he was going to contact me again, and not to let him in because he still won’t know what he wants. I was skeptical.So I was out to dinner with my friend and he freaking facetime calls me. I’m like um that’s weird. He must be dialing the wrong number. My friend Daniella was like no one accidentally facetimes someone. I ignore it. I’m like oh if he wants to talk to me, he’ll text me. The next day he doesn’t call or text. I’m like totes accident. Few days later he has the nerve to text me “Hey”. I’m like umm hi? I’m surprised you’re texting me since we stopped talking. Diplomat was like, don’t be like that. I’m like why are you texting me? He’s like because I want to and missed you? Blurb of our convo:

Diplomat: So your not open to us talking or hanging out occasionally? I’m busy with school and work. I’m not very diligent in my personal relationships. It’s not a reflection on you or how I feel about you.

Me: So you just want to hook up?

Diplomat: No. Just see each other when we can. Is that okay? I’m not too interested in a serious thing, not with my schedule.

You bet your ass I was like, Umm no. You can’t date me and then fucking flake and then text me like 2 weeks later and then act like every thing is okay and then ask if we can casually hook up.

I then changed my mind a week later. I’m like okay we can talk. In my mind I’m like it’s okay he’ll just be an option while I go date other guys. TBH, it’s because he’s a really good kisser and great at cuddling. He’s all excited and is like okay, next Saturday, I’ll take you out to dinner and a movie. I text him Wednesday because I haven’t heard from him for a few days, and was like “hey”, you know super casual. THIS MOTHER FUCKER GOES:

“Hey. Sorry I can’t meet up this weekend. I actually just got back with my ex girlfriend. How’s everything?”

I legit almost broke my new iphone 7. First of all, I never knew his exgf was in the picture. Because literally a week before he was all “Come stay at my apt (in NJ) and we can grab dinner by me. OH was I gonna 3rd wheel with your ex you clearly were talking to? 1 week later you’re with her? Two, you’re gonna text me ‘How’s everything’?! Well it was good until I fucking found out you were a bigger dick than I thought. I thought you were too busy to date. Whatever. OVER IT. I texted him “Oh okay, good luck with everything”... 8 hours later. And you bet your ass I had read receipts on his texts. This clueless asshole texts me back. “You took a long time to respond to me after reading my text”. UMM WHAT? Don’t you have a girlfriend you should be talking to? I mean I got back with my ex after breaking up once. It only lasted 3 months because we constantly fought after that. Soooo good luck with that diplomat. You know what they say, you broke up for a reason.

On to the next... So I matched with this guy on Bumble. He’s a physical therapist who lives in Brooklyn. He was sweet and smart. Girls, let me teach you something valuable about online dating... Pay attention to the type of pictures a guy posts. PT only had selfies/ pictures from the chest up.... Keep this tidbit in mind.

So we talk for a loooonnnggg time. I find out he knows how to tango and salsa. I’m taking classes so I’m like this is perfect, you can go to my classes with me. At one point I’m like are we fucking pen pals now? We talk like ever day for a month. He schedules our first date on a Thursday. He asks if we can do Saturday instead. Friday rolls around he asks if we can reschedule to Tuesday. Umm okay. WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?! So I’m like okay clearly we’re not gonna see each other. So I text him “It seems you are pretty busy now, it seems things aren’t going to work out, best of luck to you”. I mean this text was carefully crafted by 4 of my best friends. I guess in this day and age, we’re used to fuck boys messing around/juggling a schedule of dating 10 girls in like 1 week. But his text completely threw me off guard and made me feel like the biggest asshole.

PT: No it’s just that I take care of my father, he’s sick. So if you could just bare with me. That’d be nice.

Hi, my name is Millennial in Manhattan, and I’m the biggest asshole. So I of course apologized profusely. He agreed to still go out for dinner. So I patiently wait. And wait. He finally asks me to dinner on a Tuesday evening. I meet him for dim sum in Chinatown. I get to the restaurant. He showed up to the restaurant early and tells me he’s sitting down at the first table. I walk in 5 minutes late. I get to the table. He stands up. And no lie, he must be like 5′3″. I’m 5′5″ and I thought I was average height. He’s also larger than the pics he’s sent me, with slightly less hair. I get caught off guard. I don’t want to be rude so I sit through dinner, make convo and ignore the fact that he has small hands that are not proportionate to his arms. Ladies, if a guy on his online dating profile doesn’t show a full body pic, he must be overweight or short. But in all honesty, I did/do really feel really bad for him. He must’ve been self conscious about his height, he was really sweet and was respectful to me. So no, I will not make fun of him because he deserves better than that.

So I had one hell of a week. PT didn’t turn out to the be the guy I thought he was. And Diplomat was well diplomat. Today at work I was like I should prob take a break from dating...

Well that was until I agreed to drinks with a financial wealth advisor from Wells Fargo and some guy who lives in the UWS. Here’s to hoping for more amusing blog posts.

xo,

MiM

#online dating fails #online dating #nyc #manhattan

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survivormuxloe · 6 years ago

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Episode 16: “I’m a petty bitch betta know that” - Scott

FUCK YOU RHYS HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA I SURVIVED GOAT ASS BITCH IM COMIN FOR THAT FIC WIN SO I CAN TAKE UR GOATY ASS TO THE END AND WIN I FUCKING DESERVE IT THAT WAS THE MOST STRESSFUL THING OF MY FUCKING LIFE HOLY SHITTTTTTTTTTTTT AS ANNA WOULD SAY IM HARDDDDD

Oh boy mo lost firemaking. Oh well. I tried. Not sure there is much hope in me winning, but guess I have to try. Ima be preparing a bomb ass speach, and a decent rites of passage. Not looking hopefully but like fingers crossed.

Also I think I’d make end either way now. Scott wants me in the end probably. Ryan wants me in the end probably. So if so. I get 2nd at the least. But I’m probably winning immunity anyway so ;).

ok its the day after.. n i finished my rop.. hopefully the jury likes it. LOL LIKE I WASNT GUNNA JUST KISS THEIR ARSES FUCK THAT im gunna be honest ab my feelings...

also like. kinda feel bad ab my confessionals last nite ab rhys.. i was a bit. excited. but. its tea. LAMFJBFHBFG

Final immunity is a little stressful. Like it’s the last one to win, if I win this that’s 5 individual wins. Just something more to put on my speech cause I’m gonna need it.

I’m feeling confident I can manage to pull out this win so like yeah I’m gonna have to work and try to win each part of this.

im actually gunna lose this fic which is super annoying bc it means i get 3rd LOL! aLMNFBFG

like memory lane i can win if im not dumb which i am so. winterbells i'll 100% lose like i lost to anna lol. endurance i'll 100% lose bc i'm such a forgetful slut i only lasted 40 mins in canadienne.... slide puzzles are legit my worst nightmare and then the mystery task i looked up from last ssn and it took them 11 mins so if i take more than that i lose... yay!

wow i can't wait to get 3rd place;;;; i feel like scott has gotten into rhys' ear and now i'm not the prime choice to be brought to final 2 grrr. at least thats what it seems like idk. ugh rhys doesnt deserve to make final 2 and it will make for a boring ftc zzzzzz who knows maybe scott or i can pull out an upset. i lowkey think scott would vote me out tho which is ugly and i would 100% be bitter at him idgaf KLFADHSKF

earlier i wasn't really sure what rhys and scott were thinking in regard to who they'll bring to f2, but since then i've talked w both more and i feel like 80% confident both will take me to final 2 so that's cute 8~] i don't think i'm doing well in the final immunity so far so i'm honestly banking on that lol.... as much as I think I'd have better chances against Rhys as the end, I am rooting for Scott to win it and bring me bc that is the ending this season deserves imho. i don't think there'd be a clear cut winner going into it and the ftc would be contentious as fuck... i hope at least lol. Scott def played a really dominant strategic game but def has some iffy relationships with jurors. I played a really purposefully utr game for most of the time but i think it's respectable, although there are some point against me like sitting out of so many challenges, that tie vote with jones voting early being the reason i was saved... but i think i can make a good case despite those faults and i'm honestly excited to show a new me at the live tribal. like i've been nervous as hell every time we had to go to tribal bc calling makes me anxious af, and that was def a contributing factor to me sitting out of the spelling challenge and even the card stacking one. so I'm planning on forming my case around that anxiety, and hopefully the contrast between my ftc performance compared to every live one before that will bank me the jury's respect. kind of like Kristie from AU survivor where she stunned the jury bc all game she had appeared so timid and dumb at tribals. hoping i can channel that energy and pull out the win hehe

so we got 5 and a half ish hours until deadline. uhm. i'm honestly really happy with my scores? like. i feel as if i have a big chance of winning this and that would be SOOOOO fucking good like both of them can smd honestly if they think im giving this chance up and getting 3rd or getting 2nd to ryan... like i love him but hes beyond dumb if he thinks im taking him to the end i cant throw a victory like that lol.

i dont wanna get 2 confident tho bc knowing my ass i'll be crushed if i lose this fic lol like at least if i dont i know ryan wins so it isnt that bad but it should be me!!! im a selfish cunt i need this jsjsjs

i say this after doing endurance for 5 and a half hrs so my brain is a little floopy rn :) forgive me :) aLFMNHFG

uhm ya. rhys can suck my ass as well with his OH IDK WHO I'D PICK!!! like bitch if u pick ryan enjoy a rerun of canadienne only this time ur losing unanimously lol

Honestly im done with Scott. Like stop being rude okay. Like I GET IT. YOU DONT WANT TO BE 3rd!. I GET IT. Like quit it with the "I dont want to wait to be cut", cause honestly, I dont know who im taking, OR IF IVE EVEN WON YET. so like stop it. Like ive been told im gonna loose, stop attacking me, because i essentially chooses who wins.

I think my immunity went good. I did good in all the parts I think.

ok.... time to guilt scott into bringing me to the end lmfao

Dammit I was so close to winning, but in the end from what I’ve heard I’d be the best choice for Scott to take to the end. So fingers crossed. Scott will take me there cause I really want to make the end. Even if I loose. I’m proud of my game and I just want to get as far as I can.

BIG FUN! CUS TONIGHTS THE NIGHT. bitchhh i get to pick who i want in f2 with me!!!

THIS IS SO EXCITING BC I LEGIT HAVE NEVER WON A FIC OR A F3 CHALLENGE BEFORE AND I FUCKING DID THAT!!! I SWERVED THAT VICTORY AND ITS SO FUCKING SATISFYING HOLY FUCKK

NOW IM GUNNA MAKE RHYS SUFFER EVEN THO IK IM PROB PICKING HIM BC HE WAS AN ASSHOLE LAST WEEK :)) IM A PETTY BITCH BETTA KNOW THAT

LIKE RYAN UNDERSTANDS IF I VOTE HIM N HE 100% VOTES ME TO WIN AND I DONT PLAN ON FLOPPING FTC SO :) BYE! UR WINNER IS HERE!

i feel like scott is gonna vote me out and i’m a bit gagged sbdbjsjsjs i really didn’t expect him to slit my throat like dis but. ig he wants to win badly and rhys most likely secures him an easy win so i cant blame him. still sucks though :C i thot we were solid dndjjdjs and ugh i dont wanna join that angry ass jury

ok so i'm still not giving up on tryna convince scott lol. honestly like i've made it this far in the game, no way i'm gonna accept defeat so easily. i don't actually know if it's better for scott to sit next to rhys than me, it probably is but seriously my game isn't amazing and i very well could see scott beating me. i think he's really overestimating how much the jury "hates" him like idk they aren't that petty, if anyone is it might just be michael. but scott really has dominated this game and everyone is aware of it, he should beat either of us.

So, this could be my last confession.

Scott, I don’t know where he was thinking. I thought it was general concensous that I was the one to loose. Yet here I am Scott is still unsure about who to take and it’s an hour 40 untill tribal.

So like this could speak well about my game if Scott worries he can’t beat me. It could also just be him wanting to take his best friend to the end. So yeah. I’m like 50/50 when I thought I should’ve been 99/1 about staying.

I can’t believe I’m here. I have a half chance at winning. That’s if we’re even which were probably not.

This is probably an uphill battle for me, so I have to go hard or I’m going home empty handed. I haven’t lasted this long just to come second. I do think I’ve played a winning game. I think I can make a killer final tribal preformance just to solidify my case. Hopefully this will be the third winner of celestial.

So final tribal happened.

Funny how has mo won that tiebreaker I would’ve lost unanimously. So thanks scott for winning that, and the FIC.

I think this could go either way tbh. However if I win it’s because of Scott’s bad jury management which isn’t the way I wanted to win. I would’ve preferred people to see my game more and respect that but because my moves weren’t big or flashy I have been put down to doing nothing.

it's 2 and a half hours until we find out the winner. am i nervous? absolutely.

do i feel as though i deserve to win? absolutely.

it just keeps ringing in my mind what ryan said in his speech that the jury seemed to root for rhys and be bitter against me. i feel as though my speeches and answers were much better than his and i was able to explain my game so much more clearer so i'm hoping that they reconsider and see that i controlled the game.

if i lose i'll be gracious and nice to rhys because at the end of the day it was my own fault that my jury management was bad but it'll definitely sting because i don't really see that he did much tbh alkfjhfg. i love him but it's tea. especially when he's said that i probably deserve it more. ):

i'm really just hoping for the best at this point! anything can happen and hopefully it'll be in my favour hehe. it's been an incredibly fun season and i wouldn't change it for anything else.

this has been mr scooty toots with his finale confessional, and hopefully mr scooty toots will join the winner and the hall of fame. hehe. will lowkey be awkward if i lose tho!! LOL but oh well alkdjfg

Scott wins in a 8-1 vote!

#episode #royallyyours

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corneliussteinbeck · 8 years ago

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#GGSFlawless

On New Year’s Day I posted a very raw and vulnerable picture of myself in just a tank top and underwear on my professional Facebook page with a message that is very close to my heart.

I felt compelled to post this photo because as women, starting at a very early age we are taught that our bodies are riddled with flaws and that we must be beautiful before we can be anything else. Feeling ashamed of their bodies keeps young girls and women from going out for sports, participating in class, speaking up with their ideas at work, and applying for schools and jobs that they really want.

Our preoccupation with what is “wrong” with our bodies silences our voices and prevents us from being fully engaged in the world and our own lives.

The Proof Is in The Pudding

As my photo spread around the internet, it garnered all kinds of reactions ranging from extremely positive to extremely negative, including of course, the ever-classic discounting of a woman’s experience we are all-too-familiar with:

“She couldn’t possibly feel this way/have experienced this because [insert their personal opinion about my body here].”

Yet, in the very same thread of comments, I had people telling me that I couldn’t possibly have ever been ashamed of my body because it’s too perfect, and one guy offered me diet advice to get rid of my “bumps and lumpy bits,” while a woman made rude comments about the texture of my skin.

And therein lies the crux of the issue.

When you let other people define your standards and ideals for you, you hand your power over to them. You are riding high when they tell you that you’re beautiful and you’ve “made the cut” and you come crashing down the moment they tell you that you’re fat.

As Girls Gone Strong advisory board member Erin Brown says “The trouble isn’t in valuing beauty, but in defining it so narrowly that we cannot possibly achieve it. We value women in parts and pieces, striving for this celebrity’s glutes or that celebrity’s lips. It’s impossible and exhausting, and every time we achieve a level of beauty we believe we will be happy with, we are presented with a new set of rules and standards to try to live up to. The solution isn’t ‘not valuing beauty’ but rather, expanding its definition to include us.”

So many of you have joined us in revolutionizing your resolutions, and we know you understand how important this conversation is—now we ask you to help us spread the #GGSFlawless message.

The women below have shared a photo of themselves telling their stories and letting the world know why they will no longer let others tell them that their bodies are wrong, and why they are “flawless.”

To be clear, #GGSFlawless

…is not about thinking you’re “perfect.” …is not about “settling.” …is not about believing you have no room for growth or change.

It’s about no longer subscribing to other people’s ideals and standards for your body.

Join Us!

To join these incredible women and help us spread the #GGSFlawless message:

Share a picture of yourself on social media letting the world know that your body is your business and that you will no longer let other people’s definition of “flaws” define you. Remember to use the hashtag #GGSFlawless.

By participating, you will not only help us reach exponentially more women with an empowering, body-positive message, you’ll also be entered to win amazing prizes! (Make sure your post is set to “public” so we can see it and notify you if you’re a winner!)

Prizes include:

Modern Woman’s Guide To Strength Training Platinum Edition — $199 value each

Strongest You Coaching Scholarships — $500 value

GGS Apparel — $50 value each

HUGE discounts on tickets to the Women’s Strength and Empowerment Weekend

30-minute coaching calls with GGS advisory board members Jen Comas, Erin Brown, and Jessie Mundell

Remember to use the hashtag #GGSFlawless when you share your picture and statement so that we can find it and enter you in the giveaway!

Jen Comas

I refuse to accept the term “embracing my flaws” when it comes to my body.

When I look in the mirror, I see a powerful, helpful, emotional, adventurous, deeply passionate, hard-loving, creatively-gifted woman. I see a woman that knows her worth is rooted so much more deeply than to a number on the scale, or to a certain dress size.

The only reason that certain things on one’s body would be viewed as “flaws” are because that person chooses to accept that descriptor from the media or other people. I actively choose not to accept that, or participate in that kind of language.

The media and other people don’t get the right to dictate what our bodies are supposed to look like, and they also don’t have the right to determine what is considered a “flaw”.

What some choose to deem as a “flaw” is their problem; not mine, and certainly not yours. I refuse to feel any sort of obligation to meet other people’s expectations about something as personal and precious as my body.

No, I do not need the quick-fix detox, diet pills, or tightening creams that are constantly pushed upon women, thank you very little. Those things won’t help me a bit when it comes to the most important things, such as living a bigger, bolder, or more fulfilling and loving life.

My opinion is the only one that matters, and my body is flawless because I say it is.

Learn more about Jen: Website – Facebook – Instagram

Karen Smith

Before my hysterectomy, I never showed my abs, never trained in just sports bras, I would always cover because I feared what people would think since I was a trainer without a six-pack. Now with my scars I am more confident to show them because my scars show an inner strength that helped me make the tough decision to have a preventative hysterectomy to limit my chances of ovarian cancer.

Learn more about Karen: Website – Facebook – Instagram – Twitter

Alison Chen

My body is flawless because it allows me to move, be agile, live life to the fullest and grow a living being. My body changes and with each change it is still flawless. I can be lean, round, bloated, pregnant, older and still beautiful. I am flawless and that doesn’t mean there are aspects that can’t change, get stronger or more flexible. Being flawless means loving myself and what my body allows me to do in this moment. When I love myself I treat my body with respect and nourish it with healthy foods, water, clean air, exercise, endurance and positive thoughts. My body is unique. My body is beautiful. My body allows me to live an adventurous life. My body allows me to bring life into this world. When you honor your body, nobody can take that away from you. Live your life, live your body. And be flawless in it.

Learn more about Alison: Website – Facebook – Instagram – Twitter

Amber Mikaelsson

I don’t subscribe to the idea that my flaws are beautiful, because I don’t agree that any part of my body is flawed. It has been abused, shamed, and tormented for being “flawed” for too many years, I refuse to mistreat it any longer.

Self-acceptance in the face of cultural norms that constantly tell us we don’t measure up is the ultimate act of rebellion, but it’s also the ultimate act of compassion.

You deserve that compassion. More than anyone else in your life, you deserve compassion. But it has to start with you. You must change your mind.

Your body is glorious exactly as it is today, no matter its size, proximity of your limbs to each other, or texture of your skin. Your body is a badass impressive mighty machine that carries you through your life. Your body deserves a bit of worship. And if you could agree that it is a pretty incredible tool, you could change the way you feel about it without putting a caveat of “when it looks different” onto it.

The other way? The one where you pick apart your “flaws” in the hopes that it will eventually lead to your happiness? It will always be there. It will be there tomorrow, next week, next month. You can always go back. But standing on the other side you may choose to stay right where you are. Loving what you’ve got and taking care of it the way you deserve to be taken care of. Flawless, as always.

Learn more about Amber: Website – Facebook – Instagram – Twitter

Amna Al Haddad

I am often told, “Amna, fix your teeth, you’re a public figure now.”

I love my teeth. I love the space that is in between. In fact, it makes cleaning them a lot easier and a lot smoother. They’re 100 percent healthy. Why should I fix what’s already great? I will not alter my teeth – as long as they’re well and healthy – to make someone else comfortable. They’re me.

Once at university, some nine years ago, a professor saw me and my smile and he said, “People with gaps in their teeth are successful. Remember that.”

Look at me now… my teeth prominently featured on Girls Gone Strong!

Learn more about Amna: Website – Facebook – Instagram – Twitter

Chrissy King

I’m 5’11” and weigh 185 pounds—and my body is flawless.

I grew up bigger than everyone else standing at 5’8” in the third grade (yes, you read that right). I spent years of my life trying to be smaller, and the more I shrunk, the smaller I thought I needed to be. Until I finally said enough is enough… eff that.

I’m perfect the way I am. I’m not here to spend my life focusing on being a smaller version of myself.

Society constantly barrages women with messages of what our bodies are “supposed” to look like and attempts to convince us that we are inadequate if we don’t meet those standards of beauty. They want us to believe that we need to “fix” ourselves.

But I don’t need “fixing.”

I can take up as much space as I want to, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. I’m not the leanest woman you’ll meet. I don’t have six-pack abs. I have cellulite. I have stretch marks. I have a muscular back and shoulders. I have very large legs. But you know what? These babies can deadlift and squat hundreds of pounds, and they are strong AF. And even if they couldn’t, they would still be perfect.

My self-worth is not derived from my body fat percentage and neither is yours.

I’m strong. I’m healthy. I’m happy. I’m unapologetically me. Most importantly, I’m flawless.

Learn more about Chrissy: Website – Facebook – Instagram – Twitter

Concita Thomas

Oh my goodness. Look at her… yep. My name is Concita, and I have a big bottom—and for as long as I can remember, I believed that it should be covered, camouflaged, and kept out of sight. But, I have rejected that narrative.

The size of my backside (or lack thereof) does not determine my worth. I am frankly not interested in five steps to a smaller bottom. As long as I can run fast, jump high, and rock my favorite jeans, my bottom is alright with me.

Bring on the red yoga pants because it doesn’t need to hide. My bottom is my business and quite frankly, I think it’s flawless.

Learn more about Concita: Website – Facebook – Instagram – Twitter

Jill McLean

Once, when I was 15 years old, as I was walking into a grocery store with my best friend and her grandpa, my friend’s grandpa looked at me and said, “Why is it that you’re wearing pants on a such a hot day?” “Because I don’t like my legs,” I replied. “Well, you better start because they’re the only ones you’ve got.” And man, was he right.

You don’t have to look very far to see American beauty standards splashed in our faces.

Television. Internet. Magazines in grocery store checkout lines. Billboards. Malls. Even the sides of buses are plastered with 3 foot posters of women lounging around in the their underwear longingly looking at a bottle of perfume as if it were her lover (because I do this all the time, right?).

What we see in media and what we’re internalizing as the real standard of beauty isn’t real at all. It’s fake. It’s a fantasy. It’s a profit-driven industry exploiting women’s (and men’s) insecurities. Millions of women will chase these unrealistic ideals for the rest of their lives, and until we recognize these messages as toxic and harmful and reject them… we lose. I choose not to lose any more of my self esteem or time chasing after ways to get rid of my stretch marks, cellulite and soft belly that housed my son. Because these aren’t flaws. They’re a part of my story. And I choose to love the story that is my body. All of it.

Learn more about Jill: Website – Facebook – Instagram – Twitter

Kellie Davis

Since I was a young girl I began receiving hurtful comments about my skin. Until recent years it’s been something I’ve felt shame about. I’m prone to moles and freckles and my back is covered in them. In my teen years I suffered from embarrassing acne and as I age my acne scars become more prominent on my cheeks.

When I was little I was often teased about a few moles on my face. I remember trying to think of ways to cut them off when I was in upper elementary school. I would sit in my mirror with scissors wanting to ‘make the ugly go away.’ I had them removed in high school, but that didn’t make the shame go away.

Up until recent years I would still edit out the moles on my back and abdomen when I sent photos to my trainers. Now I embrace them, realizing they are what make me uniquely me. My body is a whole, not a make up of individual parts. I spent years feeling so embarrassed about my skin that I neglected to love all of me. And all of me deserves to feel love.

Last summer while at a rugby match with my son and drunken older man behind me commented that I had an entire universe on my back. He was just being obnoxious, but that was actually a pretty cool thing to think about. The universe always has my back. How amazing is that?

Learn more about Kellie: Website – Facebook – Instagram

Nardia Norman

For the majority of my fitness career I have felt “less-than” or not good enough to be a great Personal Trainer. How could I be when I have always carried a roll-y, soft tummy and stretch marks on my hips? No matter how lean I got, even when I competed, I always had a soft, fat belly. The stretch marks have a mind of their own. I was in a constant state of comparison to the Oxygen cover girls and forever focused on these “flaws.”

Surprisingly, in 2014 I was awarded the title of Australian Personal Trainer of The Year. I was awarded on my talent, not my body. As a result I woke up. I was also pissed off. For years I had let someone else’s definition of a “perfect body” convince me that I was not good enough.

Yes I bought into the notion but it was the norm. Everyone around me, my peers, my mentors, my clients were all on the same agenda. It saddens me that I contributed to it.

Today the woman in these photos is starkly different. Finally, at nearly 40 years of age, I am in love with my body – the muscles, curves, bumps, everything. I refuse to allow anyone tell me what is beautiful or not. I am not defined by my body, and my body cannot be defined. It is not flawed. It never has been, it has always been perfect in many ways.

The truth is this — no one has the right to pass any sort of body judgment or agenda on anyone’s body. Period.

Learn more about Nardia: Website – Facebook – Instagram – Twitter

Remember! All you have to do is share a picture of yourself on social media letting the world know that your body is your business and that you will no longer let other people’s definition of “flaws” define you — and be sure to use the hashtag #GGSFlawless!

The post #GGSFlawless appeared first on Girls Gone Strong.

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