#I’ll talk about it again when I rewatch it in the future

[cloama]

I want to talk about Barbie (2023) but not really in conversation with anyone so I think it’ll be a trickle of thoughts about my theatre experience.

For instance, while the theatre was packed with mothers and daughters, I was seated next to a tween boy who was not excited for the movie. He damn near passed out laughing during several scenes. He didn’t finish any of his snacks. He didn’t go to the bathroom.

None of the children in the theater went to the bathroom, which you’ll know if the true testament of a a movie’s success. Nobody moved, honey.

The monologue has been critiqued as baby’s first feminism but I don’t know what y’all wanted from a megacorp. I’m still surprised it even got in there. One of the moms in the theater stood the up and clapped bc apparently she needed some of that second wave feminism. Everyone’s politics isn’t where yours is. It always starts somewhere. Again do not know why people are complaining. This is nothing compared to Marvel’s not infamous girl power moment where they all just stood there. Also the speech while very Plan but heartfelt, coming from America Ferrara just carries a couple extra layers for me personally as she was one of the first actresses of my generation who was a chubby teen girl who was allowed to be a real person.

Also it’s not just the monologue. It’s wishing it was as easy as pulling your fellow people into the back of the van and reprogramming them with facts. In a world where facts literally don’t matter anymore, it felt like science fiction. I don’t know y’all, I just got a lot out of that script. Like if your gonna do a giant advertisement movie, this is about as good as it gets. And it didn’t feel icky like a dove ad. Similar to the mist recent Dungeons and Dragons, it felt like playing.

The Ken stuff was fun but we have to discuss the MASTERFUL use of Matchbox 20’s Push, which is about the rare disempowered man who wishes to get a leg up on his female partner who appears to be emotionally hurting him in their relationship. I need time. Bc Greta? Noah? They were crazy for that one. Absolutely mad. Ken comparing his struggle with Barbie’s boundaries to a man whose actually being hurt bc Ken is a doll and that’s about as far as his understanding goes [see: horses]. Reader, I died laughing. I think I was the only one in the theater that this bit really worked for. It was a stroke of genius and seems to be going unnoticed.

The acafans have been surprisingly quiet about this movie, all the merch and the orchestrated resurgence of Barbie. Make no mistake, this is fandom. Star Wars fans were allowed to buy their books, dolls, and bumper stickers in peace but the idea that a movie will make some people want to buy a 20 dollar doll or some pink pants is stressing people out. Would love everyone to step back and breathe. They’re always going to try to sell us something. They’re selling us something most of y’all have been buying.

I think I am less bothered by the capitalistic effects because for once I didn’t totally hate the experience of being sold something. Probably because I’m not buying anything and while I live a pink life, I’m not actually a Barbie girl. What I am is an early educator and dolls, dramatic play are a huge part of development.

What I also am, apparently, is a Barbie movie script defender because above all else, that script was tight as fresh box braids. A hilarious straight forward comedy. It should be a celebration of putting money behind talent but it’s a reminder of why writers need to be fairly compensated. This movie marks the end of summer, representing so many things. It’s complicated. Pink and complicated.

[lawlightautismtruther]

Love how absolutely NOTHING in Light’s life was important after L died to the point where we cut, what is it? 5, 6 years in the future before anything matters again? That’s insane. We got absolutely zero insight into his attitudes towards L after he was gone, which almost makes me think he took it just as rough as he did victorious, which is something that Obha didn’t want to portray as to not disturb the sort of “stoic” tone he’s obsessed with giving everybody for some reason.

I’ve said it before, but I don’t think Light is emotionless either. I think he’s quite literally two people in one body. Light Yagami and Kira. Unfortunately, Kira is the stronger and more frequent of the two entities. But still, when I rewatch death note, I catch glimpses of Light Yagami here and there (pre-Yotsuba of course, because that wouldn’t count). I’ll talk about those instances in the future, but yeah. Kira took delight in L’s death. Light was destroyed by it.

Actually, I think Light’s instinctual reaction to L falling to the floor was distress. You can see it in his face before it shifts to a smile. He’s actually upset by it to the point where I wouldn’t doubt BOTH of them teared up in those last moments before that shit-eating Kira grin shows up. (Obha/Obata would never actually show this, unfortunately 🙄) I even think the scream wasn’t entirely acting. He wasn’t scared about the shinigami though, Light screamed because L ACTUALLY died. He did it. Light got what he wanted and now his only friend is fucking dead.

Do I think Kira laughed at L’s graveside? Yes. I do. But I think Light cried first. I genuinely have reason to believe in that.

I headcanon a Light Yagami gripping the bathroom sink or toilet seat, throwing up and crying in the immediate aftermath lmfao. I genuinely don’t believe that it was all sunshine and rainbows, hence the time skip. It’s not just because it was uneventful, it’s because portraying that time period would force Obha to get into the grief more than he was willing to.

I WHOLEHEARTEDLY believe every word I just said.

[umathurwin]

Omg hi! I feel like I’m the only sofia hater out there bc all i see are people loving her character is so boring to me and her and rafe relationship seems so forced to me like she is supposed to help him reconcile with his sister but instead, she spent all season doing nothing apart from the hollis plot

being called a sofia hater cracks me up because i feel like i never talk about her, in fact i usually forget she exists 😭 but i’ll accept it, because i really do hate the way her character (which had a great premise) was totally wasted

a youtuber i really love once described pansy parkinson from harry potter as “an original character wearing the skin of a minor character” and i think that perfectly encapsulates sofia. they make these moodboards, these stories, these elaborate headcanons about a character we know little to nothing about. do i respect it? hell yes. it takes a lot of work. but to have these intense convictions and arguments about a 0.5-dimensional character… WHY?

i went and rewatched every scene in s4 where she even just appears and wrote down my thoughts on them (despite how tedious this was… the action really does rely on the pogues) and like… wow. where do i start

her s4 introduction is the scene where rafe scatters ward’s ashes on the boat, and it’s awkward but in a fair way. i wouldn’t really know what to do either. in the same episode, she’s at the enduro cheering for rafe, but she is inexplicably standing TOTALLY by herself. i still have no idea if this was just filmed oddly or if it was deliberate but this photo kills me… girl why are you alone? at no other point is she physically excluded from the kooks like this. wtf

and after that? nearly every single moment she and rafe share the screen? he’s awful to her. he verbally mocks her in the bar when she tries to calm him down. he flirts with hollis right in sofia’s face and abases her for feeling hurt. he dismisses her every time she tries to express her opinion. rafe does not respect his girlfriend, nor does he care about her thoughts and values. how do i know?

because she knows. how exactly did she convince him to take the deal, again? well, first she says she thinks it’s a good idea, which merely amuses him. then, she makes up a lie about other club members denigrating rafe and how this deal could improve his social status—i believe this to be a fabrication because it easily could’ve and should’ve been explicit on screen if true— and this causes him make up his mind. she knows rafe’s insecurities. she knows what does and doesn’t entice him. and yeah, i’ll be honest, sometimes it makes me sick to think about how deeply she knows this man, and how little he knows/cares about her

rafe brings up marriage, living together, a future with sofia. but do you notice anything about his big grand speeches? ever notice how, when he’s describing his fantasy, it revolves around material things he can own and show off— and sofia has always been one of them? rafe never has anything to say about what she specifically does for him, what he likes about her. bc… what does he like about her? rafe is unfortunately, at the end of the day, selfish. he focuses on what he’ll be able to give her, and what having a pretty wife says about him. the occupant of that role is, well, interchangeable

when rafe “proposed” to her and she did not confess the scam, i knew it was over. this is rafe cameron we’re talking about, a man who values loyalty more than anything in the world, and that was her last shot at coming clean before it was too late. committing a betrayal (well…in the eyes of the narrative…more on that in a sec) and hiding it from him? guys there was zero chance of him learning the truth and forgiving her. i watched the premier with my mother and i even turned to her and said we just watched the final nail go into the coffin. and it did!

(also, not to beat a dead horse, but even after he gives her the ring and he leaves to morocco, he dismissively excludes her again! “i have to go” “what are you doing?” “don’t worry about it, bye!” and she just takes it?! STAND UP!)

fundamentally, sofia’s “betrayal” plotline was weak or, at the very least, not very well thought-out. it’s like the idea of sofia going behind rafe’s back was pitched, but they were unsure how to integrate that into the season. the explosive reaction that rafe had when groff revealed the plot seemed contrived, like the show wanted to put more of the blame on sofia than was warranted. rafe had all but made up his mind by the time sofia had been paid off; to claim that she was the big catalyst in his decision is unfair and literally just wrong. sure, he liked her giving her blessing (because he already wanted to say yes), but i have a really, really genuine question for all of you.

if she had said no, would he have called off the deal?

(spoiler, no. because when she changed her mind after learning of the scam, he dismissed her yet again. the show has countless opportunities for rafe to just care about his girlfriend, and he never takes them!)

while i’m nitpicking, she also never learns any information via her own efforts. every single time she uncovers a new detail, it’s because she’s working around a loud-mouth kook who coincidentally says the right thing at the right moment as she refills their ewers. fuck, can we give her a CRUMB of agency? please?

and yeah, i don’t even engage in any theory that sofia helped rafe reunite with his family. did she ever give any meaningful advice to him? she didn’t even have context—was he ever planning on telling her exactly what he’d done to sarah and her friends? could sarah even pick this girl out of a lineup?! ya, she really is the glue in the cameron dynamic. lol

counter arguments i’m ready to address:

“he takes the deal for her!” funny because,,, he really doesn’t. we even watch the reason he takes the deal— his family. rafe likes the opportunity from the jump but is hesitant because of the investment, and a dreamy montage of him, ward, and sarah is what cements his decision. sofia canonically had nothing to do with it

“but he says he’s taking the deal for him and sofia when he’s alone with hollis!” correct! but you’ll notice he literally only brings her up when hollis starts hitting on him. he’s not attracted to hollis, and her advances make him visibly uncomfortable. bringing up sofia was a way to shut down hollis without explicitly telling a business partner to get off his ass

“rafe brings up sofia’s opinion of the deal with groff!” true, but i actually see this as a display of rafe’s tact and emotional intelligence. rafe is suspicious that he’s been scammed, but it’s genuinely not wise to barge into the office of the man who has $400k of your money and your testicles in his fist to start threatening him— even when he’s not a murderer. “hey… so my gf thinks you’re scamming me… thoughts?” he’s being coy. he’s being smart. he’s not bringing up sofia in a loverboy context. cmon

***

deep inhale. okay, i’m done. i’m sorry i always forget about her. but it’s so much better than the alternative

[kodamaghost00]

30 Charlie headcanons

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[Disclaimer!!]

I know Chaggie is canon but for the sakes of this post Charlie will be single. [Im a passionate chaggie shipper pls don’t kill me]

This post will contain: NSFW,Sfw, Fluff, Smut

It's also Genderless for the girls,gays and theys! You're a new resident at the Hotel in this scenario.

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Let’s begin!

Her favorite nicknames for you are “Sunshine” and “Pumpkin”. And everything sweet in general.

She makes you breakfast every morning and gets excited when you do the same.

Loves morning cuddles. She’d stay in bed just enjoying the embrace and warmth of your body.

Would not really understand your interests but enjoys seeing you being happy. So she will engage and learn about your interests and hobbies. “So you’re into that? Sounds interesting, Sunshine!”

She is definitely an early sleeper. She wants to get the most out of a day as possible.

Listens to 2017 white girl music on a daily basis and you guys vibe all the time.

After she got to meet Rosie she always went to her for advice or help in general.

She gets very flustered and ashamed when people as about her sexual life and declines to talk about it openly.

She likes PDA a lot though. Showing off her perfect partner with kisses and hand holding? Fuck yeah!

She definitely confessed her love to you first. She gave you flowers and a love letter wich read “Please be mine and go on a date with me!”. With an adorable doodle next to it.

She’s more of a dog person but loves KeeKee with her whole heart.

She’s is surprisingly dominant in bed. She pins you down aggressively but afterwards asks you if you are okay with it.

She is very flexible so there are many poses you guys could try out.

She enjoys oral a bit more than anything else. Seeing you shutter under her control makes her feel very reassured.

She definitely goes into her demon form when she’s close. Her tail wrapping around her waist trying to keep her composer.

Great at aftercare. She makes sure you feel reassured and comfortable once you’re finished. Cuddles and kisses are a must.

“Are you comfortable pumpkin? Would you like a towel?” And also whispering reassurance to you is important. “You did great by the way… you look so cute!”. A total sweetheart.

She is great with all sorts of people. Even the ones who are really disrespectful to her. So sometimes you keep those people in place.

Won’t curse until she needs to. She isn’t really going hard on the curses when she does curse. A simple “Fuck you” or “Motherfucker” is enough for her.

She absolutely adores kids. She also wants at least two in the future.

Gets shy easily. When you compliment her hair or her big round eyes she gets flustered right away.

In her emo phase she definitely said “ITS NOT A PHASE!” and now she looks back on it and laughs every time.

Hopes she will see Emily again one day. They definitely had a great time together.

If you’re not able to sleep at night she’s singing you to sleep. With your head on her lap and her playing with your hair.

LOVED the Barbie movie and rewatched it twice. And cried at the ending.

She is an hardworking woman so she’s encouraging you to help her out a lot. Trying to make you feel included!

When she gets overwhelmed she locks herself in her room and cries herself to sleep.

“Hey Charlie…? Are you okay…?” You asked knowing she’s feeling down. “Y-yeah! I’m fine pumpkin… don’t worry!!” “You don’t have to pretend my love…”

She sighed as she opened her door. You see her puffed up eyes so you open your arms wide. “Come here…” she hugs you deeply. “Thank you…”

You kiss her forehead as she embraces the hug. “No need to thank me sweetheart.”

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MASTERLIST

Yes I know no one asked for this but I love Charlie so you gotta listen to me rant about her. Give my girly more love and attention! So as always I’d love to get some requests for characters, I’ll try to do all of them but there’s so many! Thanks for reading my dear friends and have a lovely day/night!

- Your Ghost ༼ つ ╹ ╹ ༽つ

[bloomingskullz]

Now that Mers officially over can I talk about how much Theo and Mer has meant to me.

Mer came out when I was still a sophomore in high school (15 years old) and at the point I was still figuring out my own gender and identity stuff, so seeing a character actively working through the same things as me meant the world to me.

Me and Theo have similar struggles with our transness and that’s hard to find rep for. Feeling like you’re not enough for the gender you know you are and thinking you’re still just that little girl no matter what you’ve tried. Being able to watch Theo go through that struggle but still be accepted by house around him and by himself is part of the reason I think I’ve been so accepting of myself. At the beginning of mer I wouldn’t be wearing or doing half the things i am now just cause of how uncomfortable it would make me to look “like a girl”. And well a lot of dysphoria and discomfort for still present I’m able to handle everything a whole lot better.

Not even just being queer wise Theo is so similar to me and I see so much of me in him. Being overprotective of people we consider family, being paranoid about things constantly, and worrying about everything. And then being able to see him grow and change from that makes it seem like I could get better with it too. Even if those are still struggle with watching mer shows that I could stop feeling this way.

Theo is like a light showing me what my future could look like and I’m so thankful that I was able to find it.

Mer became a big part of my life (even if I only really watched heyhays pov) from the moment I watched the first vod. I would recap the newest episode to my friend durning chemistry almost every class ( I thing I still do with him). Being able to watch this story play out from the very beginning was a magical ride that I’ll miss being on.

I’ll miss coming home and instantly watching the newest lore of Theo. I’ll miss rewatching the first few episodes over and over again cause that’s all I had and I was already obsessed. I’ll miss the big surprises and emotional twist this series gave us. But I’m so happy they all got the ending they deserve and that they got their stories shared.

While I’m sad to see Mer leaving that just leave more room for me to latch onto the smp they put out. 

[unfortunatelyilikebnha]

The best tdmd moments/things (to me; vaguely but not entirely chronological) (also I haven’t read the manga in ages and I’ve only - recently at least - rewatched bits and pieces so some of this is paraphrased while some of it I went back through to get exact quotes and NO I’m not going to do that for all of them it would take too long) (readmore bc it’s a lot):

- “As the crowd shouted, trying to make Sero feel better, Todoroki took a moment to melt his opponent from the ice prison he’d created. For some reason, in that moment, he looked very sad to me.” Ok so this is not the sports festival moment everyone talks about but it LIVES in my head ABSOLUTELY RENT FREE. It’s like, we know Todoroki’s been watching Midoriya for a while, mostly due to his obvious connection with All Might, but in this moment, while everyone is focusing on Sero, Midoriya is Watching Todoroki Back. He Sees Him.

- MIDORIYA TELLING ENDEAVOR THAT HE IS NOT ALL MIGHT AND SHOUTO IS NOT HIM. Midoriya is freeeeeaked tf out bc endvr is intimidating + he’s worried he’ll discover the secret of OFA but the SECOND endvr starts talking like an asshole, Midoriya SHUTS THAT SHIT DOWN. Again, Midoriya has had like ONE conversation with Todoroki and actively Really Wants To Get Away From Endeavor, but he just gets so mad about the way that Endeavor’s talking that he pauses his retreat to correct him and I think that’s beautiful.

- One of Todoroki’s episodes/chapters being titled “The boy born with everything” and how you could easily contrast Midoriya as “The boy born with nothing” (I could not find a definitive answer on whether canon actually calls him that but like). The juxtaposition of their opposite struggles and the underlying understanding that underneath it all they are really not that different. That they have both suffered, and are both trying to make the most of a power with a difficult legacy. (This brings me to the next point because -)

- “It’s your power, isn’t it?”/“It’s yours! Your quirk, not his!” Yeah. I don’t even have to explain this one I think, everyone knows it’s THE tddk moment. I’ll forever die on the hill that Todoroki should’ve found out about OFA sooner and we should’ve had a direct reversal while Midoriya was still struggling with thinking of OFA as his quirk instead of All Might’s and Todoroki repeats Midoriya’s words right back at him. I mean, Horikoshi LOVES to do that (see: repetition of “body moved without thinking”, “meddling when you aren’t asked to is the essence of being a hero”, “that’s what friends are for, right?” etc) the setup was RIGHT THERE, like taking my shipping goggles or whatever off for a second I think it would’ve been a great addition to the story regardless bc it’s an example of how Midoriya has helped other people AND a reminder that he has not quite conceptualized the advice he gives others for himself! Even without that though, we see how important this moment was to Todoroki literally throughout the rest of his arc, to the point that

- “Midoriya, this is my power. Thank you.” IF WE DIDNT GET TDRK TELLING MDYA THAT OFA WAS HIS QUIRK, AT LEAST WE GOT THIS. MY GOD. I was trying to go mostly chronologically, but since we’re talking about a follow-up to “It’s your power, isn’t it?” I HAD to mention this scene next. It’s a really lovely moment because 1) it’s an acknowledgement of how much Todoroki’s grown (which he did on his own! Midoriya reminded him of why he wanted to become a hero in the first place, and he had a lot of support from friends (& teachers/family) but TODOROKI decided to put in the work to become the kind of hero he wanted to be!) and 2) it’s a reminder to Midoriya that he has made a positive impact and helped the people around him, which I think he’s probably struggling with since this is like. Soon after his dropout arc iirc. (Also: it’s a cool new super move that Todoroki developed himself to try to create a better future for his family!! Which, setting aside how beautiful it is that Todoroki has crafted his fire into something that won’t hurt, is also fun bc Midoriya loves quirks and gets to nerd out over Todoroki’s cool new move lol)

- TODOROKI SHOWING UP TO THE STAIN FIGHT. Todoroki has been friends with Midoriya for like a week and gets a location pin with no other context and IMMEDIATELY deduces that 1) Midoriya’s not the kind of guy to randomly drop his location so 2) he must be in danger, and 3) IMMEDIATELY TELLS ENDEAVOR HE’S GOING TO CHECK OUT THE LOCATION AND TO BRING BACKUP TO THERE AFTER HE’S DONE FIGHTING BC HE THINKS HIS FRIEND’S IN TROUBLE. When he actually shows up the first thing he says is something like “Midoriya you should include more details at a time like this. It took me a while to figure out what you meant and I could’ve been too late” but we literally see in the flashback that he figured this all out in like 2 seconds and IMMEDIATELY came to support Midoriya AND SECURED BACKUP. Every person in Midoriya’s phone received the location pin and expressed various levels of curiosity/concern about it in hindsight but Todoroki figured it out right away and immediately came to help (this isn’t a knock on the rest of 1a btw iirc the rest of them weren’t even in Hosu so there’s not anything they really could’ve done about it besides report it - which iirc Kirishima did -, it’s just that Todoroki WAS in Hosu and DID figure it out so he immediately went to help and it was that simple for him). Todoroki also just like. Instantly accepts that ok, Midoriya and Iida were fighting a serial killer, Guess He’s Also Fighting A Serial Killer Now. ALL THIS FOR HIS FRIEND OF A WEEK. This is one of the core tenets of tddkism to me: they are as ride-or-die as they come. Also notable: Midoriya is not generally in the habit of asking for help. The fact that he did, knowing nothing might come of it, AND TODOROKI SHOWED UP EXACTLY WHEN HE NEEDED HIM??? Can we acknowledge how much that probably meant to Midoriya. Also the start of tdiimd as a trio, which this post isn’t really about, but I can’t completely leave Iida out when talking abt the stain fight that’d be fucked up :(

- “We’ll protect them together”. Yes ik, another Stain fight moment, but I believe this line deserves its own point because, again, Todoroki has been Midoriya’s friend for like a week. Immediately prior to Todoroki saying this, he tells Midoriya that his plan is risky. It’s one thing to recognize Midoriya’s text as a call for help and run to be his backup, it’s another thing to let Midoriya take the strategic lead when he’s already injured and the plan itself could be dangerous. But Todoroki puts his trust in Midoriya and says they’ll protect them together, showing his confidence in Midoriya’s strategic prowess AND battle planning ability.

- “You’re a kind person, Todoroki”. Ok I’ll get this out of the way: I have issues with how the writing of this chapter could be read as implying that being a kind person automatically means you have to forgive the person who hurt you. Ik Midoriya tells Todoroki that it’s ok not to forgive Endvr if he doesn’t want to, but the way he follows it up with the fact that he’s a kind person and the assumption that he wants to forgive Endvr...aren’t my favorite. I think it kind of makes sense for Midoriya to think like this given his own experiences (and also. Midoriya is 15, some of his wording is gonna be a little bit awkward sometimes, so I don’t think that’s the only possible interpretation of what he said), but I wish that if that was the intention, there’d be a moment later on where this view was challenged and Midoriya really internalized that you can be kind and still not forgive someone who’s hurt you. THAT BEING SAID, of all the things that Todoroki is called on a regular basis, and of all the qualities Todoroki associates with himself, I don’t think “kind” is necessarily one of them. “Kindness” was not exactly a virtue that Endeavor seemed to prioritize instilling in him (and though Rei probably would’ve, she WAS absent for much of Shouto’s childhood), and he spent so much time building his walls and striving to defy his dad that it’s not something people tend to immediately pinpoint about him. Todoroki really IS kind though, and Midoriya recognizes that AND makes it a point to tell him. For Todoroki, who has worked on himself quite a lot, and just invited friends to his house probably for the first time ever + gone through a tense family dinner in front of them, I think that probably meant a lot (and his expression in that panel is so cute. Ough).

- “Thank you for being Shouto’s friend”. I think the fact that Fuyumi recognized how meaningful their friendship was and thanked Izuku for it was so significant for both of them, like neither of them, as far as we know, HAD a lot of friends prior to attending UA so the acknowledgement that it is a big deal that they befriended each other is special <3

- Tdrk catching Mdya (and bkg and endvr but this ain’t about them) during the first war arc. He doesn’t know shit about OFA at this point but he followed Midoriya to the front lines anyways.

- Todoroki tucking Midoriya in in 327 and putting a hand on his shoulder in 32…8? 9? Fuck if I know I haven’t read the manga in ages. Anyways. These are both tiny moments but I’m grouping them together bc they really show how Todoroki is there for Midoriya, in the way that he’s always noticing things about him, that he’s RELIABLE, he WANTS to be there for Midoriya like Midoriya was there for Todoroki and that manifests both in following him into terrifying fights and in the small gestures of support. Todoroki NOTICES when something’s wrong, and when he has the necessary context he steps up to help.

Bonus mentions:

- the “are you all might’s secret love child or something?” convo in its entirety. Between the Todoroki Family Trauma Dump, Midoriya sympathizing with Todoroki and realizing that despite how different their lives have been, they’re very similar, the beginning of Midoriya’s desire to help Todoroki, and the beginning of Midoriya really Seeing Todoroki, it sets the groundwork for the start of something beautiful

- AFO: “pay close attention to them, tomura shigaraki. These two could prove to be formidable obstacles to you one day”. / AM: “they may have more in common than they realize. They both have such an intense vibe about them.” The fact that both AFO and AM comment on the tdmd sports festival match leads me to believe that originally their relationship (in the original story I’m talking about the platonic sense but read this any way you will since. This IS a post abt why I ship them) was supposed to be more central to the plot, in this essay I will - (<- ramblings of a crazy person but like!!! Both AM and AFO!! And you’re telling me it didn’t mean anything??? Come on!!)

- Also “you’re helping your opponent. You’re a fool.” Their matching maniacal grins after Midoriya prompts Todoroki to use his fire. Todoroki’s softer smile and little tear. Mdya’s “Amazing…”. Them immediately deciding to go full force regardless if it kills them (IMPORTANT FACT ABOUT THEM IS THAT THEY’RE INSANE <3). “Midoriya…thank you.” (OUGHHHHHHHHH 😭😭😭)

- MDYA YELLING “DONT GIVE UP” DURING THE TDRK/BKG MATCH AND FOR A BRIEF MOMENT TODOROKI STARTS USING HIS FIRE AGAIN. Ik he ultimately doesn’t end up using his fire, but that makes SENSE, you can’t process all that trauma immediately, it takes time!! The fact that for a moment, Midoriya’s voice was enough to allow him to use his fire so soon after his life-altering revelation in the tdmd match is so important to me though :( (and the fact that Midoriya’s willing to 1) root for Todoroki and 2) root for him loud enough that both Todoroki and Bkg can hear,,, ohh tdmd are so special to me)

- their little convo at the training camp. “You have a habit of sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong” lol (paraphrased). Underrated tdmd thing is that they’re willing to tell it to each other straight. But also, the genuinely good advice of “words themselves aren’t enough, actions are also needed to get through to someone” (again, paraphrased) (reminder of how Mdya helped Tdrk!! W/ words AND actions!! And now he’s helping Mdya help Kota!)

- “I don’t know, I think heroes cry when they need to probably” - acknowledges Mdya’s crying as a positive trait bc when he’s not crying it means he’s repressing things, also serves as a reminder that heroes are people too (a similar sentiment to Uraraka’s “who will save the heroes when they need saving?”). Serves to remind Mdya that his crying doesn’t make him less of a hero + it’s ok to feel things. Also Tdiimd.

- “You can’t even cry”/“Let us share that burden together” (this is like. Veeeery paraphrased I’m sorry I don’t have access to the chapter and I’m too lazy to rewatch). The whole class said very meaningful things to try to get Midoriya to come back, but even though he wasn’t ultimately the one to fully get through to him (SHOUTOUT TO IIDA ILY IIDA THIS POST ISNT ABOUT HIM EITHER BUT JUST KNOW I CANT WATCH THAT SCENE WITHOUT TEARING UP THEY R SO DEAR TO ME) Todoroki’s is one of my favorites bc sure maybe he doesn’t understand what it’s like to have no quirk and then suddenly have a quirk that’s actually seven quirks and have a pretty much all-powerful supervillain hunting him down but he DOES understand the burden of trying to shoulder the crushing legacy of a top hero, and here he reaches out to Midoriya once more reminding him that his tears are a good thing and offering to share the burden and help Midoriya like Midoriya’s helped him.

- Light novel moments: Mdya teaching Tdrk how to make AM origami and Tdrk sending it to Rei, Tdrk going to return Mdyas pencil and admiring Mdyas AM figure and Mdya trying to give it to him bc he has another one but Tdrk refuses bc he doesn’t want to damage it so he suggests he just come visit it instead (I haven’t read the light novels but I’ve seen these excerpts and I love them dearly) (these are just all really cute it’s nice to see what they’re like outside of doing hero stuff)

- Todoroki’s “Midoriya Sense” (yes this is a fandom joke based on like the stain incident + noticing smth was up during the “heroes cry too” incident + Todoroki asking abt him before the cultural festival etc but it IS genuinely very sweet that Todoroki is always looking out for Midoriya and trying his best to help when he can)

- TODOROKI TELLING MIDORIYA TO REMOVE THE BATTERIES FROM HIS PHONE SO THE GOVERNMENT COULDNT TRACK HIM WHILE HE WAS ON THE RUN BC HE WAS A MURDER SUSPECT. Now I haven’t watched the third movie so I may be wrong about the details but it was VERY funny of Tdrk to be like “did you kill people??? Never mind that actually here’s how to avoid the government” (paraphrased for comedic effect)

-“Midoriya and the others” (cute, something Shouto says…several times lmao) (Izuku has also said “Todoroki and the others” at least once (in the first movie) but I’m not aware of it being a recurring phrase like “Midoriya and the others”)

[ryukiethebored]

I haven’t been this far gone over a show for such a long time. I’d say Death Note was the last, despite there being some extremely invested kicks along the way (my revisitings of Stranger Things, Lost, and Orange is the New Black had me for some time). I feel like the difference was cutting watchers off abruptly - since all those shows had completed seasons and season 2’s Squid Game ended on a cliffhanger of a sort, when I assumed the entire game and story would’ve gotten some sort of end. That and the way it focuses on such small, intricate details leaves plot theorizing and character analyzing such a fun activity to do in the meantime. That may be something to say about enjoying a show or any piece of media in a gradually-spaced or dare I say weekly episodic manner so that it’s kept with you longer, as much as I’ll still binge something if it all exists all at once anyway. It’s been a lot of fun thinking about what could happen, but also insanely surprising how rapidly and hyper-fixated I’ve gotten. It’s practically all I think or talk of right now (my partner is extremely supportive and patient for it, lol), I’m now rewatching episodes from both seasons over and over, and I feel I’m in inspired, creative spaces again. Which doesn’t happen to me often anymore, and - while this sounds dramatic for what it is - has worn deeply on my soul.

I will admit the dynamics of Gi-hun and In-ho has been the most fascinating by far, and what’s specifically gripped the very atoms of me. I can’t decide if I want to go fully down the shipping road or not (I have a few theories for the future of the show that if becomes canon, could put a problematic but not impossible [depending on your limits hahah] hitch in 457 as a romance), but knowing me and if the chemistry’s in front of my eyes, I’ll go there regardless. Even what starts as a joke or curiosity always leads to stone-serious delirium dedication ahaha…

For those of you who have followed me for Death Note, let me say these character dynamics are v much in the same vein. There’s In-ho, who to me could pass as a love child of both L and Light in certain ways - and more like Light in the end (we’ve got an enemy secretly in plain sight and intimately interacting with the vital character who’s trying to take him down situation, much like Death Note). Unfortunately, the only real interaction they have is in season 2, but it does make rewatching season 1 with another perspective entertaining once you’ve gone down this hole. I think this noticed similarity (clearly I’ve got character types) got me hooked on them a little faster than what’d be usual. Gi-hun, on the other hand, isn’t so much an L to In-ho’s Light, but has a personality more fitting of Matsuda with his trust in others, naivety, and messy optimism - which while I love the psychological warfare of morally bankrupt genuises - is refreshing in its own way. In season 2, Gi-hun mirrors what I imagine a version of Matsuda after his spirit’s been broken (by Light’s betrayal). Not wholly broken, though; his spirit, albeit traumatized, is still there. Also like Death Note, the overarching idea of Squid Game is “we’re trying to eliminate the filth of society and restore the world.” Similarities aside, the show is set apart and its people hold up as entirely unique characters. Both Gi-hun and In-ho would have clear differences from Matsuda and Light. In-ho is a grown-ass man from the very start of the story, for one, and has what I’d consider more genuine, tragic motivations beneath his behavior and choices beyond outright boredom and the black-and-white morality common of the naive youth (not that that stops me from enjoying Light as intensely, lol).

What I’m really trying to say in a plethora of words is that I love them, your honor, and my mind is in a pit of Squid Game and my mind has a million theories and ideas inside of it that I’m not entirely sure how to manifest. My roleplaying days have felt more or less over, but my fanfiction days may not be. Another telling sign I’ve lost it over something is the fact I’ve been spill-writing thoughts out like this, when under normal circumstances I struggle immensely and rarely ever do. I don’t believe I did it often even for Death Note, but then I did roleplay as an outlet, and contributed the occasional piece of content. I’d like to try to do the same with Squid Game. Meanwhile, I’m on-my-knees grateful for all the wonderful souls who’ve already given the fandom what they have.

[v-i-r-i-d-i-a-n]

The main question: What was after Will Byers?

(And a second more important question: what did it want?)

The show obviously wants us to believe that it’s a demogorgon, on first watch anyways. I believe we can infer there was a demogorgon in the shed with him- at least in the upside down. Even considering everything I’m going to talk about- I still agree with that, strangely. But before that? I’m calling bullshit.

(For reference this is technically the second thing I wrote about for the first episode, BUT I’m releasing this BEFORE that because it’s a more well thought out analysis, and can exist more as a standalone, I will probably add to this in the future. This is also technically unfinished? I don’t have a definitive answer to the questions I ask. I’m simply trying to bring more attention to it.)

🚨SOMETHING TO NOTE‼️ I HAVE NOT WATCHED A SEASON OF ST IN LIKE 6 MONTHS, PROBABLY MORE, IF ANY QUESTIONS I ASK GET ANSWERED IN LIKE AN EPISODE, DON’T BE A DICK ABOUT IT, I DONT REMEMBER EVERYTHING🚨

Also just one more thing before we get started, I’m sorry this post has a lot of exposition- I know that some of the things I say have probably been said before, hell the analysts in this community have talked about and seen this show far more then I have and I have nothing but respect for anyone whose put in that much effort- and I truly do not mean to copy or steal anyone’s work- if you feel like I’m not giving credit where credits due, or like I’m stealing something PLEASE tell me- i’ll @ you or cut something out- I don’t want anyone to feel disrespected by what I talk about, but I also don’t remember every post I’ve ever read or that’s on this app, this is merely supposed to my own fun twist and thoughts about the events

NOW, I know, I know, fifty billion other people have talked about how weird Will’s vanishing is, how it doesn’t make any sense and there’s something else going on, BUT, if I’ve learnt anything from this fandom, it’s that we love to read and write the exact same things over and over again. And!! That’s how discovery is made, so I’m doing it anyways >:3

Its hard to decipher where exactly to start with Will’s vanishing, because the entirety of it is completely jumbled and twisted and doesn’t make sense, whenever I think just a little too hard about it I feel like I’m being so completely mindfucked, like even now I’m sorting out things and every other sentence I realize something else and have to figure out where to put it- ANYWAYS

So I’m just gonna start at the beginning! In the Wheelers house.

Now, the first bit of strangeness we get in this sequence is when they’re all going home (I could also argue the DnD game has some weirdness, but that’s for another time, as we’re focusing something else right now) more specifically, when Mike waves Will off and his garage light starts flickering.

I think that’s supposed to be because of the like “town wide electrical problems” that are happening because of the gate opening up, and most likely not because of something already being at the Wheeler’s house.

i’m gonna argue there’s something there later in a different analysis I’m complying, because, I don’t believe that the thing following Will is the same being that killed the scientist in the lab, hell, I don’t think it was a demogorgon AT ALL, honestly I’m a little skeptical that the thing that killed that scientist was even a demo BUT that’s for my first analysis to cover >:))

I want you to think about this for later however, because I am desperately trying to stay on track, but I just have way too many thoughts about this little stupid show.

The sequence of Will Byers Vanishing

(And all the fuckery is includes)

For this segment, I’m going to take you through Will’s vanishing, and all the little discrepancies and “plot holes” that I’ve seen on my rewatch

The vanishing starts with the light on Will’s bike going out, he looks down, momentarily taking his eyes off the road, and looks back up to the “demogorgon” standing suddenly in front of him. We don’t see any obvious gate, or anything of the sort really, it just sort’ve appears (unless we think that for some reason it’s been stalking through the real world…which doesn’t make much sense considering how demo’s hunt.) And the thing that tickles my brain the most about this scene is that…the demo just sort’ve seems to be standing there? We only get a few seconds of it on screen, but the way it moves makes me feel like that it doesn’t even really know what it’s supposed to be doing. Like, it got zapped down from some alien spaceship or something.

Will, in response to seeing a horrific nether monster, veers off the side of the road, like any child would, and gets up slowly, which again, its sort’ve strange he’s able to get away with that? Most of the time, when a demo gets its eyes on a target, it’s pretty quick to act, not quite the “lie in wait” type of hunters when they’re in the regular plain. He gets up and just sort’ve stares for a second, and we don’t really get to see what he see’s, instead, we just a hear growl, which sends Will running in a panic.

The next few things are fairly normal in the sequence, he gets home, locks the door, pets his dog a little (me too bro), and runs around looking for his brother and mom.

He runs quickly back to the window, after he can’t find them, and as he’s looking through the clothesline…wait-

*wipes glasses*

Nope, I’m seeing this shit right WHY ARE THE CLOTHES THERE?? THATS NOT WHERE THEYRE SUPPOSED TO BE. Why is it so close to the window??? With how the lines are set up we should’ve seen them when he’s running into the house- but we don’t. They’re actually at a completely different location in the next scene at the Byers house in the morning.

(Put a pin in that)

Anyways, in the distance through the classic horror fog we see the demogorgon slowly walking up towards the house, on its back legs again. Looking like a person stalking through the night. Like some weird Jason knockoff, I half expected it to try and get through the door with a hatchet on my very first watch through.

WHICH AGAIN, isn’t how they act. Even back in the lab, in the very first scene it suggests that whatever is after the scientist is fast, he’s running, he’s hitting the button over and over again to try and get the elevator to come faster, he’s outwardly panicked and looks desperate to get away. He’s looking over his shoulder to make sure it’s not there yet. And then after that whenever we see a demo chasing someone, they’re quick to chase after their prey. They don’t slowly walk up towards a house.

It reminds me WAY more of how a human hunts their prey, slowly following and tracking it until it wears itself out. However, I’d argue it’s less like whatever is chasing him is actively hunting him, and more so like it’s corralling him, herding him. Attempting to manipulate him to go where it wants him to. If it wanted to kill him, it could’ve done so already (especially if we take into account the whole telekinesis thing). It had plenty of chances, especially when Will was in that ditch after he fell off his bike, that’s when a human hunter would’ve attempted to kill him. It’s as if, whatever was on that road, whatever is following Will, actively wants him to go to the Byer’s shed. To the demogorgon lying in wait ready to pounce.? That doesn’t sound quite right either.

All of these analysis are gonna be me going “that’s not quite right, that shouldn’t do that” over and over again LMAO

When you take everything into account, I think there’s a quite a bit more evidence that this thing didn’t want to hurt Will at all, at least not physically, at least not in this exact instance. Whether it was corralling him in hopes of figuring something out, or actively wanting the demogorgon to feed on Will. I have no idea. But you cannot decisively say that whatever was following Will had the active intent to kill him with its own hands.

Will gets scared once more and attempts to call someone, it doesn’t work and instead he just gets the static-y growling sounds of the upside down. Which is a tad bit strange considering that the reason Joyce hears that later on is because Will’s actively trying to communicate with her. But what number is that? Like 55 of “things that don’t make sense in Will Byers vanishing?” Oh, and then immediately after we get the whole DEMOGORGON USES TELEKINESIS SCENE. 56.

(Put a pin in this as well)

Will runs into the shed, and we know (WE DONT.) what happens from there, there’s a demo in there with him(?) and he’s somehow he’s pulled into the upside down- without any real evidence of a gate there. Unless you take…the slime in the shed the next morning that Hopper finds as proof. But I’ve learnt not to hold a suspension of disbelief here. (“Did Mike see it? Then it doesn’t count” worst vibes y’know? Gotta see it to believe it.)

There’s also the whole thing with instead of the light flickering it just gets really bright. Which is another thing I don’t believe we see often- especially if we assume the light glowing bright is because of a gate opening.

I’d actually like to talk about that point for a sec, because it genuinely doesn’t seem or feel or look like anything we see after that. The way that nothing really happens, and that’s what’s so terrifying about it, we don’t hear any screams or even see the signs of a struggle. He’s not dragged through a portal by vines or a demo.

Will just vanishes, he’s not taken, or kidnapped, he vanishes. It’s truly the only word that can describe it. And it truly doesn’t make any sense. We don’t see anything like it again really, at least not that I’m aware of or can remember right now. He’s there one second, and then he’s gone. The only thing I can really think of like it is El killing the demo at the end of the season and vanishing.

All and all we get back to the same point I started with and a point I think pretty everyone agrees with. Whatever was after Will was not a demo.

But then…why does it look like one? And sound like one? Well my curious little reader, I THINK I ACTUALLY HAVE A LOGICAL SOLUTIONNN

We’re being fucked with.

(And as much as it might sound like it, I’m very much NOT joking here.)

Remember everything I told you to put a pin into? Yeah this is the section where I want you to think about it more.

By now, I’ve described the entirety of the sequence of Will’s vanishing. I don’t want to say disappearance or kidnapping because I don’t believe that’s what it was. The oddness of the demogorgon, the strangeness of his surroundings. And I’ve come to only one seeable conclusion, which probably isn’t good on a scientific aspect, but it’s the only logical solution I can come up with.

Will is being fucked with, and since we’re in his eyes for this scene, we’re being fucked with.

Will has always been my favorite little unreliable narrator.

Now, what exactly could be happening? I don’t know yet, I’m still at the beginning of the series after all in this rewatch- these are all just thoughts I’ve been having after the first episode. I can’t present a de facto answer to whatever’s going on here because I don’t think we’re supposed to know yet.

My main guess? Some sort of upside down shit. With everything we know about timeline fuckery, and illusions, and visions, and memory sequences even being untrustworthy- isn’t it possible we’re being shown something that didn’t happen? Or maybe more accurately didn’t happen the way we’re being shown?

It might be a problem with the actual timeline, like somehow false memories were implanted and the universe itself is being tricked. Or, some sort of upside down related nightmare sequence only Will see’s- maybe Will got planted into another timeline directly who knows. MAYBE- it’s even Brenner’s fault (especially with all the TFS Brenner vs Will Byers stuff) Because I will find a way to blame that man for everything.

With all of the characters saying constantly that things are a nightmare, or that it isn’t real, we can’t trust what we’re seeing on screen.

The Duffers, don’t want their audience to know what’s happening. They’ll tell us when they want to.

So, if it wasn’t a demo after Will what was it?

A person, probably

Though in this show, it’s hard to tell exactly what that means.

God. Where do I start? There’s just so so many possibilities for this one instance that I can’t fully wrap my head around it. Now I’m going to say this again, I don’t have a definite answer to what’s going on, and my opinion will probably change as time goes on and I reread other analysis posts and rewatch the show- I’m small potatoes in the analysis community and I think this is actually the first analysis I’m posting(?) wow that’s crazy actually. So my thoughts are gonna be especially jumbled for this part because at this very moment it’s a pretty big question mark.

I will say this though, I don’t think it’s Vecna. At least not the Vecna we’re shown on screen.

Why do I say this? Mostly because it doesn’t really feel like Vecna gives too much of a shit about Will- if anything, the MF seems much more interested in him.

And I know that’s like the main theory in part of the fandom, that for whatever reason Vecna is super into Will but I just don’t agree with it. There is some substance to it but I think a lot of you forget that Vecna and the MF are two separate beings (Hell Vecna and HENRY are two separate beings). Vecna is not controlling the MF, even if he believes he is. That’s pretty much proven in the VR game, if you’re willing to look deeper at it than what it’s putting forward.

Remember, we cannot trust what we see. We’re actively being fucked with at any point in time. The Duffer’s do not care about tricking their audience, they want to. So it’s almost never going to be the obvious answer.

I guess this section just turned into me saying “I don’t know exactly whats happening but it’s NOT Vecward”

I wanna say Brenner, trying to find out something about the upside down or Will himself, but the whole telekinesis thing is really throwing me off. Hell maybe it is Henry trying to disrupt the timeloop by stopping a TFS William Brenner from forming.

Everything I try and think about and put forward just doesn’t really feel quite right, I don’t have enough evidence or backing for any of my theories right now to definitively say one thing or the other- so if anyone has any idea’s they’d like to bounce off of me I’d appreciate it, because I’m kinda at a loss at this exact moment.

None of it was real

(And what that means)

This is the only thing I’m really sure of right now. Nothing about what we see is what really happened. Maybe it’s how Will remembers it, maybe his memories were actively altered by the MF or Brenner or Owens or something.

But if nothing that we saw with Will was real, then how do we know anything we’ve seen is real. Especially through Will’s POV. Throughout the entirety of the story Will has always been an unreliable narrator, from the very beginning.

That also means that this show built itself around unreliable narration. There is a reason that the one of the first big scenes we get doesn’t make sense. There’s a reason it feels like it’s built on a shaky surface.

Id argue, that the literal first scene is unreliable, but that’s again for another time.

TL;DR Everything is fucked and nothing makes sense, and everything will continue not making sense until the Duffers decide to let it make sense, oh and Will was definitely not being followed by a demo no matter how much the show wants you to believe it

If you made it this far, thank you so much for listening to my relentless rambling! Sorry the format is kinda fucked again this is my first analysis I’m actually posting. Again I’ll probably add onto this in future- but for now I’m pretty happy with how it turned out, hope y’all have a good day <33 !!

[anoriginalweirdo]

All Of Us Strangers (2023)

Directed by Andrew Haigh

With Andrew Scott, Paul Mescal, Jamie Bell, Claire Foy

✨ Personal ‘review’, it might contain spoilers ✨

‘I’d always felt lonely… even before. This was a new feeling. Like… a terror… that I’d always be alone now. And then, as I got older, that feeling… just solidified. Just a knot here all the time. And then losing them, it just got… tangled up with all the other stuff… about being gay… and just a feeling like… the future doesn’t matter. Does that make sense?’

‘Yeah. I know how easy it can be to stop caring about yourself.’

⭐️ 🌟 ⭐️

I’m NOT fine. Why did it have to combine most of my traumas like that with my obsession for ghosts and old places?

Goddamnit I kinda want to throw up, that felt way too close and too brutal at the same time. So funny how it has a parallel with the idea of the novel I’ve started to write - which has been on my mind for the past 3 years. Ghosts and imagined conversations and loneliness and sadness and trying to make sense about the future when everything takes you back to the past.

How insane is it to see a younger version of me in the eyes of Harry and not completely lose my fucking mind? I’ve only been able to let go of her and of the worst ‘what ifs?’ a couple of months ago so watching his character going through all of this throws me back two years ago.

I feel like Adam, surrounded by ghosts and loneliness and having to keep going. Luckily I feel way way better now, but I can’t help the sudden good old loneliness to find its way back and make its home again inside my tight chest.

What I would give to talk to my mother, ask her if she’s proud of who I’m trying to be and if she loves me still.

As the crazy person that I am I rewatched twice two scenes that made suffocating cause of tears.

Anyways, Andrew, Paul, thanks for the tears AGAIN. Thanks Ireland, always haha.

Also Death of a Party by Blur playing made my brain go wild.

I kinda want to rewatch it again, because it’s that kind of film that you need to rewatch to understand the story all over again with the new details. Everything is brilliant and I want to cry.

I’m gonna shut up now, I’m listening to Fontaines D.C. while writing all this, trying not to overthink about the past, and I want to cry but I should just go fucking sleep. I’ll probably see ghosts again during the night.

I want to cry again, if you didn’t get it.

I’ll be ok.

[crguang]

I like paying Genshin…🫣 but I suppose you and I can’t have all the same opinions. Speaking of which, I don’t understand why people like Natasha…I’m sorry in advance. I can understand liking most of the others, like I get the appeal but idk….can u explain? now that I’ve told you all my bad opinions…I still haven’t gotten all the messages from Kafka, very upset, I got yanqing from standard the same day AND HE KEEPS MESSAGING ME, I need him to stfu. I was rewatching kafkas story quest and umm, I haven’t looked at that photo in a bit….ngl I kinda want to rip open that slit in her shirt and—yk I need to sleep, ik when I start being less shy I need more sleep I haven’t sleep for like two days. also my friend just said that I probably don’t like nat bc she’s a doctor…my mommy issues strike again.

-🌠

i loved genshin i played it for over 3 years but by sumeru their characters stopped appealing to me, arlecchino saved me from boredom in fontaine and that archon quest was also really good but character wise she’s the only one i care about. with natlan and those white ass characters i just cant like logging in and seeing white people with latin indigenous/african inspired clothing, names and history pisses me off to no end, they lost me forever with that one bc yelan reran and i still didn’t log in consistently to get her cons… shes c3 forever now. i get mad seeing any natlan character atp like im so over this stupid game

not liking natasha is insane… if you like himeko theres no reason to not be as crazy about nat because they’re so similar personality wise and we actually know more about nat than we do about hsr himeko rn😭 i don’t see why you don’t see the appeal honestly, she’s a sweetheart who’s upheld an entire city basically on her own. not to diminish wildfire members but she literally created that too. only doctor in an impoverished and disorganized city, runs an orphanage, leader of the sole organization meant to keep the peace… she’s willingly taking on all of that responsibility because she can and wants to help. shes not even from the underworld, she was adopted by a couple in the overworld and did her studies there. not to mention that before she was a doctor in the underworld she went on expeditions to heal those fighting against/researching the fragmentum…she’s literally the most “morally good” aligned person ever. disliking her is kinda unimaginable to me bc all shes done is save people’s lives and be pretty. kafka’s nothing compared to my natty. i get it if she’s just not your kind of character but disliking her is insane to me when himeko is the same kind of kind-hearted, diplomatic, intelligent, courageous, ruthless-when-need-be person😭 natasha stepped up and saw people dying all around her for over a decade, she gave kids like Seele a future and a purpose in life and has spent every day fighting for them, she’s even condemned her own brother because the methods he was using for his research/goals were hurting others. hasnt talked to her parents in years and didnt know her dad had died because of it so she wasn’t allowed a moment to grieve like im sorry shes a hero of the people, no one has worked harder than she has— i’ll die defending natasha she’s incredibly admirable and inspiring to me. she thanks her patients for surviving gruesome surgeries, imagine the amount of people she’s lost because of the underworld’s lack of supplies yet she CARRIES ON! the strongest person ever. and she’s so gorgeous like that’s my baby fr. plus her voice is really nice. she’s the whole package, i take her so seriously if theres only one natasha fan in the galaxy its me!!! thee only healer for months before lynx came out, let’s all remember our roots (i wasn’t there but wtv) for a second. everyone’s used natty she’s an OG!

i thought kafka had only 2 messages and was getting moze/jiaoqiu’s for days then saw that anonymous “hi, nyx” and lost my mind at 6am on tuesday. hope u get them soon theyre so pathetic… she cares so bad. like soooo bad i cant believe she exposes herself like this do we think it’s because texting is easier or bc she’s intrinsically linked to the tb or both?… because those texts (+ the fact that it’s her reaching out) are just insane.

i love how yall never go all the way with thirsting when i literally write smut like i promise you can say you wanna fuck her 😭😭 everyone’s gonna agree. the things i’d do to her would have me in the hospital for dislocated joints like it’s okay theres no shame in being horny

and you definitely need to go to bed!!!!!!!! now!!!! try taking some melatonin/tea if you can or getting off your phone an hour before going to sleep, it might help a little. but you should be sleeping it’s dangerous to go too long without it, how are you even functioning right now

[adhd-merlin]

Merlin S1 rewatch: episode 5

here we go! again!!

today we are watching the Lancelot episode. just a few random comments because. I am so very sleepy and I deleted the first draft by accident.

A nice little episode all in all. Nice set up for an incredibly sexy recurring character. Some nice foreshadowing. What's not to like?

• I like how this episode opens. Merlin picking mushrooms, looking so baby. Eyes full of awe and wonder. Looking like... like he's never seen a mushroom in his life, in fact. Anyway, something very cottagecore about this. Fairy vibes.

• Also he's scarfless? For much (most?) of the episode? It looks like early in the series they weren’t so obsessively attached to Merlin’s neckerchief as part of his character design

• I love how Merlin doesn’t even try to use magic against the Griffin. He just falls on his back, shuts his eyes and goes, “Welp, guess I'll die”

• HOW DID MERLIN CARRY LANCELOT BACK TO CAMELOT

• “Ever since I was a child I've dreamed of coming here. It's my life's ambition to join the knights of Camelot.” -> Guy who's spent his whole life dreaming about becoming a knight of Camelot doesn’t know the first thing about the job requirements

• (No but really, the funniest thing about this episode for me is Lancelot’s utter shock at finding out only noblemen can be knights. That's, like. The first thing about the knights of Camelot, it seems like. You’d think he would have done some basic research beforehand. But that's also how I apply to jobs so I won't make fun of him too much)

• Merlin is such a hype man, “LANCELOT THEY'RE GOING TO LOVE YOU!!” This is literally what he says! He’s adorable.

• Merlin's acting like a kid who's found a stray puppy on the side of the road and is trying to convince his dad to keep him. “He’s great, you’ll love him, I promise. He won’t be any trouble I’ll walk him every day”

• MERLIN: “He's saved my life” / ARTHUR: “That's blown it for starters” -> ARTHUR IS FUNNY. I just feel the need to point out that Arthur is funny, actually. Especially when he’s being a cunt.

• MERLIN: “You're not a nobleman by any chance, are you?” / LANCE: “haha, good lord, no” -> someone didn’t read the job description 👀

• The way Gaius pointedly glares at Merlin after telling Lancelot he’s sorry he can’t be a knight… Like, he knows his son might be tempted to do something stupid about it (commit crime)

• I did not remember Lancelot’s tragic Origin Story!

When I was a boy, my village was attacked by raiders from the northern plains. They were slaughtered where they stood, my father, my mother. Everyone. I alone escaped. I vowed that day that never again would I be helpless in the face of tyranny. I made sword craft my life. Every waking hour since that day, I devoted to the art of combat, and when I was ready, I set forth for Camelot.

"Every waking hour since that day, I devoted to the art of combat" -> Yeah that sounds like a sane and healthy way of dealing with the trauma of losing both your parents and your entire village in one go, well done my boy

• Merlin looks SO proud of his little fraud scheme! BE GAY DO CRIME

• Seriously he is such an instigator! He says, “DAMN THE RULES, THE RULES ARE WRONG”! But he can see Lancelot’s obvious reluctance so he’s like, “We're not breaking the rules, we're bending them” HE’S SO SNEAKY I LOVE HIM

• This is such a basic narrative trope (if it even is a trope) but I love first meetings of characters who are going to become famously important to one another. I'm talking, like, Holmes and Dr. Watson. Or yes, Merlin and future King Arthur. There’s just something about it that I find delightful. "They don’t even know!! They have no idea. But I do!" This is about Gwen and Lancelot.

• Such a cute Meet Cute™. I love the way it plays with what we know is going to happen. Even if we don’t exactly know how it's going to happen in the series, Guinevere and Lancelot’s romance is the stuff of legends. I love their obvious and immediate mutual attraction. The slight awkwardness. The foreshadowing! “I'm not a knight yet, my lady” / “And I’m not a lady.” NO YET, BUT YOU WILL BE!! AAAAAH

• I didn’t pay much attention to it the first time I watched this episode but Lancelot speaks in such a formal, lofty way compared to everyone else. He literally sounds like he walked out of a book of chivalric romance. "I faced it myself, Sire. Some days past. I struck it full square. I wondered how it endured"; "Arthur stands in mortal peril", like WHO TALKS LIKE THIS. BE NORMAL. But it never crosses the line into being obnoxious, and I love how his character is defined through his speech as well as by his behaviour. Well done, writers.

• LANCELOT: "Are you two...you know" -> Lancelot wastes no time in checking if Gwen is on the market. GOOD FOR HIM. (I like how Merlin finds the idea of dating Gwen literally laughable. Bit harsh, that).

• “She seems lovely. Guinevere.” / “Oh, yeah. Yeah, she is. And the best seamstress in Camelot, I promise” -> MERLIN THIS MAN DOES NOT CARES ABOUT GWEN'S SKILL AS A SEAMSTRESS OPEN YOUR EYES YOU SILLY CHILD

• (But no, to be fair to him, he did notice)

• Arthur just... just BITCH-SLAPPING Lancelot out of the blue is actually hilarious. He's a comedian and he doesn't even know it.

• Merlin still acts like a bit of a teenager with Gaius in this ep. When Gaius discovers his forgery of the seal of nobility, Merlin tells him, “if you wanna punish me for it, go ahead” and then walks off! I’m sorry, this is a teenager acting out against his dad.

• Merlin does seem to be still testing boundaries with Gaius, but in a way that's an obvious request for reassurance, too – later in the episode he asks him: “Do you even care what happens to me?” (!!) And back in episode 1x02, when Gaius said, "What do I do if you get caught?", Merlin asked: "what would you do?" Insecure teen behaviour. Please Gaius just tell him you love him!! (He does tell him here, thank God).

• The broomstick fight scene. Much has been said about it already. The rituals are, indeed, intricate. Something so homoerotic about Arthur’s attempts to poke Lancelot in the chest with his stick. What I want to know is – did they know? Did they know when they were filming it that it would look like this. Like, was it deliberate

• @sapphickittykatherine it’s not much but there are some hints of Morlance in this ep. During Lancelot’s knighting scene, Morgana looks at him with obvious interest and asks “Who is this man?” And also later at his celebration (I’ll get to it).

The celebration scene! I love it! I’m gonna break it down into parts:

• “You played God, Merlin" -> I like this line. I think Gaius put his finger on an important character trait of Merlin’s here. He always means well, but he can be manipulative and controlling. Not so much here, perhaps, but it does emerge more in later eps.

• Not Arthur looking at Morgana with incestuous intent 💀💀💀

• “Tell me, do you think her...beautiful?” / “Yes, Sire. I do.” -> Another favourite trope of mine – two characters talking to each other but having two entirely different conversations. A bit like that cursed scene in the Disir, and with Arthur just as much oblivious (actually, could someone tell the poor guy what's going on. just once)

• Meanwhile, Morgana’s making sexy eyes at Lancelot while biting into a… cherry? I can’t tell. Some kind of sexually-connoted fruit, that’s for sure. I love how she also looks murderous while doing it. Praying mantis energy.

• Merlin and Gwen’s conversation is so cute. I’ve said it before but it’s giving girlie-and-her-gay-best-friend vibes. Look at them! They are a woman and her gay friend sitting in a bar, exchanging notes about the men around them. Over drinks. The way Merlin encourages Gwen to commit mischief too! “OH YOU ARE NO FUN GWEN. COME ON, JUST PLAY ALONG. WHO WOULD YOU RATHER F—”

• Arthur or Lancelot? I think I know what Merlin’s answer would be. At least at this point in the series. (Hint: it's not Arthur).

• “I think our Sir Lancelot might have eyes for you, Gwen” -> Merlin playing matchmaker already. I love that he’s noticed, and that he’s trying to push these two together because LOVE MUST TRIUMPH. He’s such a romantic.

~ END OF THE CELEBRATION SCENE ~

• Oooh no, Lancelot’s ruse has been discovered, SIR YOU’RE UNDER ARREST

• “You are not worthy of the knighthood bestowed upon you. You never were. And you never will be” -> possibly the worst thing anyone could’ve said to Lancelot, SIR PLEASE STOP YOU’RE BREAKING HIM. CAN’T YOU SEE HE’S ABOUT TO CRY.

• All I can think about when I see gifs of Merlin talking to imprisoned Lancelot is, “it’s okay hun”

• It’s interesting to see S1 Uther so unwilling to accept that the creature they’re trying to defeat might be magic when later in the series he will relish the chance of accusing anything and anyone of being magic. ...Growth?

(The bisexuality of this scene. Off the charts.)

• It seems to me like they were setting up Lancelot to be more of an important character that he ended up being? I mean, he was important, just by virtue of being Lancelot, but he was in a grand total of 6 episodes. But, I love that we can see Arthur’s obvious attachment (for lack of a better word) to him already. A bit like with Gwen and Lancelot, it hints at what’s to come – he is destined to become Arthur’s favourite knight (I know people like to say that it's Leon, but I think it was Lance. And after Lancelot's death it was Mordred, eventually. If you must know.) I love it, foreshadowing. You can feel the future hanging heavy in the air.

• I didn’t remember that Gwen and Lancelot met again and she begged him not to go and I think they should have kissed here

• It’s so funny that while Merlin’s trying to master the spell to defeat the Griffin, Gaius goes, “Don't worry Merlin, we have plenty of time” GAIUS NO YOU LITERALLY HAVE LESS THAN 2 HOURS

• Actually this is a thing Gaius does a lot, telling Merlin he can make it when the chances of success are pretty slim, which on one hand is very sweet, like I get it he's being a supportive dad, but on the other hand it's also... setting Merlin up to be HUGELY DISAPPOINTED if he fails? I don't know, just something I've noticed in other eps.

• The scene of Lancelot killing the Griffin is actually pretty cool? I like the glowing blue spear (how did Merlin think Lancelot wasn’t going to notice) and THE SOUNDTRACK!!

• Merlin's PURE JOY after Lancelot's killed the Griffin is SO adorable, you just feel so happy for him. YES BABY YOU DID IT!!

• I love the parallel “You did it!” scenes with Arthur & Lancelot, Gaius & Merlin, and Arthur & Uther. Very nice, big fan of symmetry

• Gaius’s pride when Merlin comes back victorious is so heartwarming. I’ve said it before but I'll repeat it, Merlin and Gaius’s relationship is possibly my favourite in the show. I think Gaius doesn’t get enough credit for being Merlin’s main source of love and hugs during his Camelot years.

• “The Code bends for no man” / “Then THE CODE IS WRONG!” (!!) -> SAY IT LOUDER MY MAN!! S1 Arthur is so vocal with his father about what he believes is right and wrong, we love to see it

• Lancelot saying he must prove himself worthy of being a knight – of course, he might have been holding the spear that killed the Griffin but he wasn’t the one who actually defeated it, and this will not do. He must now abandon his life-long dream of being a knight and go fight strangers in a cage for money. It’s the only logical next step.

• LANCE I LOVE YOU BUT WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS

THE END!!

next episode is... one no one really cares about, but I really really liked it the first time I watched it so. hopefully it will live up to what I remember :3

[tonitheloftwing]

Top 5 films of all time (in Tonitheloftwing’s opinion) so my friends can voice their opinions.

This isn’t rlly in a set order, since these movies are all vastly different and which one I like the most will probably depend on the mood I’m in

5) Curious George: A Halloween Boo Fest. I’ve loved this movie literally since it released. For a movie that’s completely age-appropriate for little kids, it’s off the walls BONKERS. It’s also really charming and sweet. There is a “slasher” or a movie monster that the townspeople would realistically believe in, and in some circumstances, realistically be scared of, but the concept is funny enough that I don’t think it would scare any young viewers. Like, I’m a grown adult now, but I still love this movie for being an insane comedy with so much heart that’s also appropriate for young kids. The only complaint I really have is that the twist with what George decides to be for Halloween is really cheesy, but also, this was a movie made for toddlers. I can’t really complain lol

4) Back To The Future (the first one). I haven’t seen this one in a while, since I only have it on VHS and my VHS player shat itself a while ago. Which is why it’s a little lower on my list of where I’d rank these movies right now as we speak. But this movie is obviously very critically appraised so I don’t have much to add. It’s just really good throughout the entire runtime and there are no dull moments. Also I want Marty McFly’s gender.

3) Recess: School’s Out. This one is… actually very similar to Halloween Boo Fest. It’s a comedy, with a lot of emotional moments and heart, meant for younger viewers (although definitely an older age demographic than Boo Fest). And this one is even more insane in what it actually does with its plot. I haven’t actually seen the show… but I’m lowkey obsessed with this movie lmao

2) Shrek 2. Definitely recency bias since I just rewatched this one but god it’s so fucking funny. And again, the serious stuff is also really good.

1) Jumanji (1995). I’ve talked about this movie SO MUCH so I’ll spare you guys the full explanation of why I love this movie, but unlike most of these movies, Jumanji isn’t on here for being fun or comedic. Like yes, it definitely has those moments, but imo they’re like the worst thing about the movie. They’re not BAD… but they kind of distract from what the movie is about. Despite the pop culture impact, and the Rock, and the fun jungle theming, the original Jumanji movie is a really beautiful and accurate story about its four main characters coping with CPTSD in different ways. (At least, I’d consider all four of them to have CPTSD, although I guess you could argue about Julie, Peter, and Sarah. They all have PTSD, and Alan most certainly has CPSTD.) I didn’t think much of this movie as a kid, but when I rewatched it after going through a traumatic experience that I could actually identify as being traumatic, I was bawling. It handles the topic of trauma so well, and doesn’t make the characters’ traumatic experiences the butt of jokes. (Alan and Sarah will pick on each other but this is exclusively portrayed as assholish behavior.) I beg that people watch Jumanji with this aspect of the movie in mind since it’s what elevates it from pretty good to fucking phenomenal

[candygalaxyyy]

It’s 4 AM for me rn, I should probably go to bed because my sleeping schedule is a mess… but I’m dead set on understanding the timeline for the eighth sense. Sorry in advance for any misinformation or plot holes :) I’ve been rewatching episode 6 since Wednesday and I’ve just finished rewatching all six episodes again, safe to say things are becoming clearer. So first of all, it’s not a dream. The whole of episode 6, the drowning scene, jae won pulling ji hyun out of the water, it’s all very real. Even though the gas station scenes felt very surreal and almost mystical, especially with the lighting, blurred polaroid effect and music, but it’s still real?! People have already mentioned that on here; about it being real, time being warped with future events and other theories. And idc if this is obvious but I need it in writing to come back to.

Here’s my understanding of the past/present/future theories. Everything in episode 6 is the present, up until the trauma kiss. After the trauma kiss scene the screen fades to black, I believe that indicates a shift in the timeline being shown (it happened before but i forgot when exactly I’ll update later after I’ve watch it again). So the eighth sense is centered around jae won’s therapy session! How do I know this? Well after the opening theme in episode 1 the first scene we see is jae won at his therapist’s, and she says ‘tell me about your worries’. And so the story begins. He mentions in either episode 4 or 5 that his current worries kicked in after leaving the military so we meet ji hyun exactly when jae won’s been discharged. We still get ji hyun’s focus sometimes because as much I feel this story is jae won centered, ji hyun’s perspective gives a full picture of their relationship (have not grasped the whole story of why yet, probably to give depth to ji hyun and his importance in this story).

Jae won’s present day therapy session only appears after certain triggers are brought up, and the most telling one is him getting wasted, and his dad smashing the camera his brother gifted him (episode 5). I think this is the trigger that causes the whole therapy session, cause he mentions him putting up a front (his fake friend taehyung talking about his family), his dad aggression (broken camera) and other things we’ve seen. Furthermore, it was the longest snippet of the session we’ve seen thus far. It’s also all one session, we know this because they’re wearing the same clothes and hair in every therapy scene. Anyways, as he lets all his worries out and she asks what makes you happy these days. He thinks of ji hyun, tells her and then she says she should further their relationship if that’s the case. So he decides to take ji hyun to the beach, following the advice of his therapist and since ji hyun told him to rely on him. (present day leading to episode 6). So now we are in episode 6, going to the beach and all that good stuff, Jae won opens up because he’s just been advised to deepen his relationship with ji hyun and he feels comfortable to do so. They surf and give each other trauma through kisses… THE SREEN FADES TO BLACK.

We’ve jumped to the future, the lighting, tones and atmosphere after the trauma kisses has totally shifted from the rest of the episode, so it’s fitting to say it’s future events. To me that hotel scene is another trip in the future because they clearly say that they are only staying for that one night on the beach, because they don’t have clothes (and after them getting close on that trip it is safe to assume they will definitely go on more boyfriend trips). One reason I think the writers might have done this is to remind us of jae won’s current relationship with well deep relationships. All of his relationships after his brother and up till ji hyun were surface level. Why? Because he lost someone who he loved so deeply in such a traumatic way, he couldn’t protect his brother, he couldn’t protect his love so he chooses to disassociate from human relationships. But he can’t do that with ji hyun, he’s on his path of loving ji hyun. HE TOLD HIM SOMETHING HE’S NEVER TOLD ANYONE EVER BEFORE, HE WANT TO BE A PHOTOGRAPHER AND ONLY HIS YOUNGER BROTHER KNEW THAT. JAE WON IS ALREADY TRUSTING AND LOVING JI HYUN ON ANOTHER LEVEL THAN ALL HIS CURRENT RELATIONSHIPS. And of course after this we cut to them getting even more intimate and in their boyfriend era in the hotel, that’s their future. The drowning scene is also their future. And how will jae won react to *potentially losing another loved one after just starting to open up again (JI HYUN WON’T DIE THOUGH). How will he handle the guilt and pain he feels when ji hyun ends up in a hospital bed because of them surfing together in deeper water when ji hyun can swim that well? How will ji hyun handle it this time around?

[destinygoldenstar]

It’s that time again!

To prepare for the next episode, I’m rewatching Digital Circus the days prior to its release.

So by Thursday I’ll be rewatching Episode 3. Leading to Friday when Episode 4 comes out!

Yay! THIS WENT SO WELL LAST TIME!!!

THIS DIDNT LEAVE ME OVERWHELMED BY TUMBLR NOTIFICATIONS AND ACCIDENTALLY STARTING FIGHTS

I TOTALLY DONT REGRET THIS ALREADY!!!

(Now I can’t imagine how Gooseworx felt when the Pilot came out…)

I mean, you guys seem to like my Digital Circus posts anyway, and I do love this show and want to talk about it more in the future. So… enjoy?

[wigglebox]

Thoughts on the SPNWIN Finale

Okay so I’m gonna divide this into two parts: Implications for the future of where this show will go, and then implications for a potential continuation. 

**This is me writing after only seeing the episode once and then popping through here and there to try and remember things, but I may mis-remember or misinterpret but I wanna get these first thoughts out of the way!**

First off, just to quickly summarize my thoughts at the top: I really loved it. 

They had a hard hand dealt with this show, which is, only 13 episodes and no promise of a season 2. Because of that, they had to write it in a way that both closed this season but kept the door cracked open for more season. It’s a very very hard balance to do, but I think they still did it. 

To me, I have a lot of questions, but I LIKE having questions because that draws me back for season 2. And, if done properly, it can also lure people into the continuation. 

Implications for the future of SPNWIN

This episode was a whirlwind so I apologize if I mis-remember anything! 

I think the key thing that I took away from this in terms of future potential was the journal. They have Dean’s journal in the sense that Dean and Sam had John’s journal. 

John and Mary take off in the end but I have no doubt in my mind Lata, Carlos, and Ada will all come back and play a part some how as well. 

Which, by the way, the fact that this Carlos was THEE Carlos that was referenced in a Robbie episode a million years ago is so amazing, idk why. Robbie you madman! 

But, now we more or less have the confirmation that this isn’t truly our world, however we are going to be sticking with these characters in the future. Therefore, I don’t know if that means they’ll be universe hopping too, I don’t know if it means they’ll uncover more mysteries from Dean’s journal? I think that’s likely. I also think that will be fun. 

I also ALSO think that will provide more world building for the continuation, like this season already did. 

There is the obvious issue in the room of that being there were only 13 episodes and this may have felt more like a mid-season finale rather than a finale, however not being promised a season 2 has had to have been thee most annoying thing to write around. 

But, for a first season, it set up some solid base foundation work for them to continue to explore more stories while also not screwing around with canon. 

There are still questions I want answered and who knows when or if they’ll ever be answered. The biggest one, however, is what on earth is in that journal?

I have more questions but I need to rewatch the show to form them so they’ll be in a follow up post most likely. 

Another question I have is: Was that really Dean from start to finish? The hair is the biggest thing for me bc J finished filming Big Sky and there was no reason not to cut it, or use a wig of some kind [lol]. But also in general it felt different a little bit. Like it’s still him but also it didn’t feel like him from the pilot and from the photos we were seeing. But it really may well be him all along! I imagine that’s part of the mystery. 

I don’t think we’ll see him again, or if we do, it’s not going to be the same version. I think he served as a launching point. Several friends have made this point already but basically he laid the foundation for all this multi-verse stuff and now the kiddos are on their own and there’s a lottttt to explore. 

Again, I have to rewatch in order to fully form my thoughts on the future for the show. 

My question is gonna be basically are they going to explore different universes? And, how, if Chuck kinda offed all of them? But I’m okay with my questions for now because I like to go with the flow of the show. I don’t want to figure everything out right now. 

Implications for a SPN Continuation

I’ll talk about this first since I have some frens who were disappointed that 1) Cas wasn’t with Jack and Bobby and 2) Cas wasn’t mentioned. 

If you’re new around here, then I’ll cut to the chase now: I am a full on “Cas Is Not In Heaven” believer. There are several reasons why. I am also a “Chuck Won” and “Jack is Chuck” believer. Also several reasons why. 

I don’t believe Cas is in Heaven because they never showed him getting there. “Well Jack got him out of The Empty,” is one of those things that I’ll believe it when I see it, because otherwise, it’s too shady for me. Cas was last taken, alive, to an Empty where everything else was awake and alive and taken on behalf of a deal, not because he died. The Empty has wanted Cas for a while, and has been pissed that he’s gotten out. Cas is a PRIZE for The Empty so I don’t really see it giving up Cas any time soon for any particular reason. 

Especially if that reason is Jack. 

I don’t believe The Empty likes Jack either, especially after their last interaction being so bad (Jack exploding in The Empty, waking everything up). I don’t feel like The Empty is willing to do any favors for him. 

God isn’t supposed to be able to influence The Empty but I think, since Lilith and Lucifer were brought down, that Chuck and The Empty had an arrangement. And from 15x18 to 15x20 I had literally no reason to believe that Cas, a threat to Chuck, would have been let go for any reason, even if Jack was “God” now. 

It would have been sloppy story telling, in my opinon, if they tried to explain how Cas got into Heaven in such a short amount of time, and would have extremely taken away from the emotional magnitude of 15x18. 

And that’s how I felt with 1x13 of The Winchesters. 

If we had seen Cas I would have been upset, I think. Because again, there’s no explanation for him being there. If it wasn’t going to be a *wink wink nudge nudge* thing like “We’ll explain it in the continuation” then I didn’t want it. 

The reason why I feel so passionate about this is beacuse of the Chuck Won theory. And because of that theory, and how Cas’ role evolved over time in Supernatural, I don’t believe Chuck can “recreate” Cas. Because Cas exists outside of Chuck’s narrative, and isn’t beholdened to Chuck, that means Chuck can’t reproduce Cas. It’s just never going to happen. 

And I feel strongly about Chuck not being able to do that SPECIFICALLY because when all is said and done, I don’t EVER want Dean to look at Cas and wonder if he’s real or not (throwback to 15x02 anyone?). 

Therefore, I did not want to see Cas in The Winchesters except for very very very specific ways that I knew deep down wouldn’t happen because this isn’t the show for that. 

And I’m sorry I wish I could go along with the Cas in Heaven memes because they do make me laugh — but also the thought of him being there with no explanation and still not showing up makes me more sad than not. 

And that’s another thing—

With 15x20, and no Cas, there had been conspiracy after conspiracy for the last two and a half years as to why, everywhere between network censorship to Misha secretly filming and then them not showing anything. I’m personally more inclined to believe a mixture of: Censorship (Dean can’t reciprocate so what’s the point) and a deliberate choice on behalf of Dabb. But that’s for a different post because this is already very very long. 

But, him not being in the finale — while it fed into the Chuck Won theory — it also didn’t have enough stability to truly land on one theory or another because COVID restrictions were also blamed (in whatever manner people saw fit to blame it). 

However, NOW — with Cas NOT showing up next to Jack and Bobby — even tho in 15x20 Bobby said that Cas helped Jack — was very LOUD to me. 

So what does that imply, to me?

1) No Cas until they have the time and space to put the story and emotions into it that it deserves. AKA — since I’m a Cas Is In The Empty believer — A rescue, by Dean. Even Jackles at JIB11 said that he’d want to explore that. Both of them have expressed an interest in exploring a follow up to 15x18. They can’t do that in the season finale of a spin off show that hadn’t mentioned them virtually at all (apart from parallels) all season. 

2) No Cas because Cas isn’t there. I’ll get into my “Jack isn’t Jack” thing in a second, but because there was also this choice not to have Cas there — once is a mistake, but twice? Now it’s starting something. Especially since this time, they DID have Jack there. It’s like they’re showing us a Cas-shaped puzzle piece missing. The piece may be missing but you can clearly see the hole and know what’s supposed to be there (kinda like Dean’s reciprocation!).

To me these are interesting storytelling tactics. And that’s what this is, storytelling. 

I feel like maybe we lost the plot a little bit, we being The Fandom, in terms of long-term storytelling efforts. 

Cas being in The Empty still really does open up a TON of plot ideas for a continuation. Is it sad he’s not with Dean right now? Absolutely. But I’d rather have them apart than have a flimsy, unexplained reunion just to have a reunion. 

“They didn’t even mention Cas,” and yeah, maybe they could have, but as friends in Discord servers have pointed out, that also locks them into a story that they may not be able to tell so it’s better to keep it like how it was in 15x20 where Dean never spoke his name. That is, it adds to the uncanny valley of it all. 

Jack isn’t Jack 

Look at this lovely post. This reminds me of the first time I was ever exposed to Chuck Won, Chuck is Jack theory way back in ... I want to say December 2020. Someone had compared Jack’s clothes to Chuck’s, and here we are again. 

Also these tags from @clarkenting​

Jack didn’t feel like Jack. He hasn’t felt like Jack since 15x19. 

I already freak out and ramble a lot about Chuck Won when it comes to Becky’s Notes in 15x04 about “no one even mentions Cas” and the line about rock music and the like. But another note she made was regarding the villain’s monologue at the end and how it kinda sucked. Jack had a monologue at the end. Jenny, in 15x20, said 8 words. 

So Jack post-15x19 has always been suspicious to me! And last night was no different, especially since it’s the most Chuck Like he’s looked. 

Also, another thing that got me, was the reference to Carry On (the Kansas song). It felt super duper pointed and not just an Easter Egg but like — hey this IMMEDIATELY reminds me of 15x20 and how Dean was like, weirdly, “I love this song!” a little too out of character in heaven as he began to drive off. 

Dean’s favorite band isn’t Kansas, it’s Led Zeppelin. 

Also, the reference felt like a fourth wall break, something that Chuck would do. 

So no, I don’t believe that Jack was Jack last night. I’m sure if I go through the dialogue, which I plan to do lol, I’ll find even more reason to believe that. 

Another thing that confused me was Bobby being there. Dean drove off, alone, and was continuously shown alone, throughout his drive. But BOBBY was there last night? Confused I am. But in the good way. 

We know now that Baby can hope planes of existence so I really really hope she can hop into The Empty. 

I’m someone who believes that Dean’s “Heaven” is in reality just The Empty. Or, as sometimes my friends will hear me call it, Chuck’s toy shelf. I am also someone who believes we DID see Chuck in 1x08 as part of the band and it wasn’t just a Rob cameo. Rob’s character has too much implication to just casually toss him in as a background character. 

--

This is super duper long, and I apologize but also not really! 

Some final thoughts (for now) (any follow up posts I make also will be under #spnwin thots):

I think this finale set up things for both a season 2 AND a continuation. I’ve been a contination believer since literally the SPN finale finished airing. At first it was a way to cope, but then it became a full blown belief for me the more and more first Jackles talked about it, and then the rest of the cast. 

I’m really excited for season 2 of The Winchesters should it happen. I really hope it does. I personally believe it has a high chance of migrating to HBO Max for a home — and if that’s the case that’ll be awesome bc I also believe that’s where a continuation will go. 

All of our favorites of the season will be in season 2 as well. We will see Carlos, Lata, Ada, Millie, Betty, Tony, etc. back. There are still questions about their characters too that we need answering. I’m still suspicious of Betty! 

I liked that they contained this just enough for the finale just in case they don’t get a season 2, but still left dangling plot threads to catch for a season 2 (which felt very season 15 of SPN to me. In my eyes, they really did leave some things dangling for a continuation.)

What kind of potential world building will we get now that we know space and time is but an illusion, lol. I like the prequel being used to expand worlds more and expand the canon more, especially when it comes to hopping planes of existence. 

Is The Empty really the big villain, or Chuck? I personally think so, and I personally think that this will help funnel some stuff into a continuation. 

“What about Destiel” yes what about Destiel? That’s a continuation problem but one that I know Jackles and Dee and whoever else will be involved will ultimately tackle as well. I may have more faith and optimism than others, but that’s because I know from past experiences from SPN that I won’t be burned no matter what happens — so if you need me to clown for you, I can! 

What about the Akrida? Do they just stop at this place? Why this particular storyline? What’s going on? We already have alternates to our own timeline that is the Akrida did not finish off our Men of Letters, Baby got into John’s hands via a car dealership (well, according to Chuck anyway), John didn’t know about hunting in our world, etc etc. 

So what else is different? Will they see OUR world? Who is dead, who is alive? Is Chuck gonna send them to other places too?

Only time will tell I guess! 

Time to light those manifestation candles for season 2 and a continuation! 

[tiltingheartand]

IM BACK and I demand and politely ask for more? Please?

I would love to know more about: the history of things to come

my first attempt at answering this got eaten by the internet gremlins. the gist was that you’re deranged (affectionate), for the record.

the title for this one comes from terminator 2: judgment day, actually. (it’s from a sarah connor voice-over after she and john and the terminator find dyson and explain to him why he has to destroy everything he’s working on.) the working title was “nothing under heaven will”, although i wasn’t super sold on it, even though that’s a line from the song that half-inspired the fic in the first place.

so, anyway, i was enjoying some new music from the crüxshadows on pandora (this song is called “tomorrow girl”) and something about it kept turning over in my head and merged with this movie from like 1999 (? i’m not looking it up, for the record) called frequency. (this is the one i was telling you and zack and kier about in june when i was rewatching the movie, btw, but a. i wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t remember anything about it, and b. you’re the only three i’ve told about it, so.)

the short version of this is “it’s a frequency AU!” the less-short version is this: buck gets a phone call in the middle of the night from eddie, one of the few people he’d answer it for (that list: tommy, eddie, christopher, maddie, bobby; possibly chim, because of maddie and jee-yun), and when he picks up all he hears is sobbing. he keeps asking eddie what’s wrong, keeps not getting any response except that the sobbing gets even louder, somehow? and then the call ends, but when he calls eddie back — super worried, obviously — eddie has no fucking clue what buck’s talking about. got woken up with buck’s call, actually.

only it happens again the next night, and this time he manages to figure out that he’s definitely talking to eddie because there’s more than just sobbing, eddie can actually talk this time. he also discovers that eddie was surprised to hear his voice the previous night; it turns out eddie had called just to hear buck’s outgoing voicemail message. because buck’s funeral had been that afternoon, and christopher had finally managed to fall asleep but eddie still couldn’t so he thought maybe hearing buck’s voice one more time might help.

the main stumbling block i’ve had as far as writing this goes, honestly, is that i … look, i like not having to worry about a Plot? it’s. nice. and there is A Lot Of Plot in frequency — i am not at all trying to recreate all of it, not least because that plot spans thirty years and a lot of “i changed one thing in the past and now eighteen things in the future are different” as well. (and also the fact that our POV character would technically be the one in the “past”, so that’s … eh. tricky?)

this is another one where i’ve got Almost Nothing written, sorry. i’ve had this idea for ages, though, so i’m hoping i’ll make some progress on it eventually.

(ask me about any of my WIPs, if you’d like!)