#I’ll post a follow up later but like…

[shecriestotheclickingoftime]

for the first time - 1.2k words

ex!Patrick Zweig x college!reader

you guys... i wrote something... and it ends abruptly but i felt like i'd rather post this and then post a follow-up later than keep this in the drafts for another 2 months...

inspired by "For The First Time" by Mac Demarco

based off of a request from a long time ago from @rayhalloffame but then i got inspired by the mac demarco song and lost the original plot- my sincerest apologies for that... (so so so sorry that this was so late and also that i lost the plot...)

basically patrick is your ex and you went off to college trying to forget about him, avoided him for a couple years, but this year you've brought back your new (shitty) boyfriend, taken him to your hometown bar, where patrick also happened to be.

tw! for drinking, also abrupt ending, also im not the best writer but i wanted to contribute something...

~~~~~~~~~~~

While she’s been away

Living day-to-day has been tough

Without her by my side

Simply being alive has been rough

And though she won’t be gone forever

There are many times I find it feels that way

And I’m not trying to forget her

Just understand how I’ll be feeling on that day

The bar was surprisingly packed, even for a Saturday night, and the overlapping conversations around him were so loud, it was hard for Patrick to even hear his own thoughts.

It was the weekend before thanksgiving, and it seemed that everyone was back in town for the holiday. Patrick recognized the faces of a lot of his old classmates from high school around him, but not you. 

He knew that you’d come back to town the past few years for the holidays, but he somehow never saw you out. He figured that you must’ve been avoiding him. You two hadn’t seen each other since the summer before you went off to college, the summer that you broke up with him.

He could remember it vividly: it was a hot July day, and you had told him to come over. You opened the door, looking like you had been crying for a while, having that closed-off look that Patrick hated. 

“I just… can’t go off to college with a boyfriend from back home. Long distance never works.”

Those exact words had been engraved in his mind since that day. Patrick Zweig had never been one for commitment, but something about you was different. Losing you had felt like losing part of himself. But he wanted you to do well in college, so he accepted it. And moved on.

Or, at least, he tried to. But even two and a half years later, things without you still didn’t feel right. Patrick felt pathetic; still stuck on some old childhood friend-turned-high school sweetheart that definitely wanted nothing to do with him. But, he still cared. 

So, here he was, standing next to his best friend Art, who had just come back from Stanford, in the middle of a loud, rowdy bar full of college kids. He already knew that you’d be avoiding him again this break, like you’d done for the past two years, but it didn’t sting any less to know that he’d go another year missing you, while you were off at college living your own life. 

Without her by my side

Simply being alive has been rough

It was right then that he saw you across the bar, standing in a group of girls that you’d been friends with back in high school, looking even more beautiful than the last time he saw you. 

You hadn’t noticed Patrick yet, and he was sure that when you did, you’d shut down and push him away again. You’d avoided him for so long, he was surprised that you two had even ended up in the same place. 

Next to you was some guy, standing stiffly and looking completely uninterested in whatever conversation you were having with your friends. It felt like a knife had just been shoved into Patrick’s stomach. He figured that you’d move on eventually, and he’s been with girls that he met on tour since he’d dated you anyways, but seeing you, with this boring, pretentious-looking guy felt unbearable. 

That “guy” was your boyfriend, of about 6 months now, that you’d finally brought home to meet your family. He was boring, and uninterested in the things that you liked, but he was stable, and seemed like a good option for you. So, you two had started dating. 

Everything with him was just… ok. He had a habit of talking down to you, making you feel dumb, and explaining things to you that you’d already known. He didn’t put much care into the relationship, he had never gotten you flowers or anything, but that’s just what guys are like, right? He treated you just fine, and you guys didn’t fight much, so it must be a good match. But something for you was just missing. 

He just… wasn’t Patrick. As much as you resisted admitting it to yourself, deep down you knew that you missed him. Which was basically why you had avoided him at all costs for the past two years, knowing that as soon as you’d start talking again, your progress of “moving on” would be completely wiped away. 

But now, the winter break of your junior year in college, you’d started to be less careful about avoiding the popular spots. Maybe it was just you being careless, or maybe you were hoping that you’d see him somewhere, at the bar, or the club, and have the “chance encounter” that’s been replaying in your daydreams since you started dating your current boyfriend. 

So, already on your third drink of the night, you couldn’t look away when you locked eyes with Patrick Zweig. God, he looked good. He’s gotten more toned from tour, and you’d forgotten just how tall he was. You could feel your boyfriend standing like a statue beside you, scrolling on his phone while your friend updated the group on all of the hometown gossip. But you couldn’t look away from Patrick. And he knew it.

Before you could fully process it, Patrick Zweig was there, standing in front of you. After two years. You wanted to roll your eyes at the smug look he was trying to keep pressed onto his face, but you could see the tenderness in his eyes as he looked at you. He looked so much… softer with you than he did with anyone else. You’d forgotten about that. 

Even your friends smiled when he joined the circle, standing across from you with an almost sheepish smile. Against all odds, they liked him as your boyfriend. At least more than they liked this stuck-up finance bro that you’d brought home this year. As your boyfriend, Patrick had almost become one of the girls, always joining in on a gossip sesh with you all as he held you on his lap, while this current guy acted like he was above that kind of “girly stuff”. 

And you just wanted to fall back into his arms. And god, he wanted that too.

But the idle chatter kept going, as you looked at the ground in silence. Your boyfriend didn’t pay any attention to your current state, he wasn’t paying attention to the conversation anyways. But Patrick did, he always did. 

“So… how have you been?” he asked, as you looked up hesitantly. And, at his voice, your boyfriend finally looked up from his phone. 

“She’s been good,” your boyfriend said, his face contorting into a bitter snarl. “I’m her boyfriend, by the way. Who are you?” he asked Patrick, his voice immediately sounding defensive.

The conversation passed by uncomfortable between them, as you dissociated from the scene before you. Your boyfriend sucked. You missed Patrick. And maybe it was wrong to break up over something like that, but in that moment, you just couldn’t care. 

Finishing your third drink, it all passed by in a blur. You pulled your boyfriend away for a second, ending that relationship before you did anything else. It was impulsive, and not your best moment, but honestly it needed to happen. 

And you ended up back with your friends, as your boyfriend ubered back to the hotel, talking and laughing with them, feeling at home for a moment. 

The rest of the night passed by in a blur, as you fell back into Patrick’s arms as the conversation with your friends continued, him laughing alone, his arms snaked around your waist from behind as you leaned against him, the haze of the bar finally feeling relaxing, instead of too loud or too chaotic. 

[sugdenlovesdingle]

I am a slut for Hurt/comfort first “I love you” 🥺🫶🏼

Hope you’re having a fantastic day 🥰

Sorry this took FOREVER, but I hope you like it!

(I’ll post on AO3 after I've had some sleep)

----

"You could always come along. Half naked men are relevant to your interests these days." Eddie teased and Buck rolled his eyes.

"There is only one man I'm interested in, and I prefer him completely naked." he grinned at Tommy who leaned over the table to kiss him.

"Likewise."

"Can someone please remind me why I'm friends with you two again?" Eddie complained.

The three of them were sat at Buck's kitchen table, grabbing a bite to eat together before Eddie and Tommy were going to another fight in Vegas.

"I saved your life." Buck reminded him around a bite of food.

"I've saved your life." Eddie shot back.

"Free babysitting."

"Well with Chris still in El Paso, I don't think I'm going to be asking for your services in that department any time soon. If ever again..."

"Chris will come around." Tommy started sincerely, but there was a grin tugging at the corners of his lips. "And I get you free tickets to fights and free helicopter flights to exclusive fights in Vegas and back. Which you could be more grateful for."

"I'm beginning to wonder if that means getting all the details on your sex life is really worth it."

"Hey, you don't have to come. I can always go with Evan and get my buddy to set us up with a nice hotel room on the strip." Tommy said turning to Buck. "The two of us, a king size bed, maybe a jacuzzi... Not leaving the room for an entire weekend..."

"And then you'll complain about about having missed the fight of the century when we get back." Buck reminded him but happily let Tommy kiss him.

"There will be other fights. A weekend in Vegas with you sounds pretty good. We could hit up the casinos. I'm pretty good at poker."

"I beat you the other day." Buck smirked.

"That was intentional." Tommy said with a wink.

"Why would you let him win?" Eddie asked, downing the last of his beer. "Why would you play with him in the first place? Mister over competitive."

"Hey!" Buck protested while Tommy just shrugged.

"I had my reasons."

Eddie narrowed his eyes.

"This is another sex thing, isn't it?" he held up his hands. "No, don't answer that. I don't want to know."

Tommy laughed and finished the last of his food.

"We should get going soon. We need to still drive over to Harbor from here."

Eddie nodded.

"But no more details about your sex life or you can go alone."

"Noted." Tommy said, getting up and putting their dirty dishes in the sink. "Don't bother with those ok? We can do them together tomorrow." he told Buck.

"Sure. You coming back here after then?"

Tommy smiled.

"If you want me to."

Buck stood up and wrapped his arms around Tommy's neck.

"I want you to. I don't care how late it gets, I want you here. And you better wake me up if I'm asleep."

"I'm not making any promises in that department. But I'll promise I'll be there when you wake up. Deal?"

Buck pretended to think it over.

"I guess I can live with that." he joked and the two of them shared another kiss, getting lost in the moment until Eddie loudly cleared his throat.

"Come on Tomás, we have a flight to catch."

Tommy reluctantly stepped out of Buck's embrace.

"The flight is me." he glanced at his watch. "But yeah we should get going." he shrugged on his jacket, grabbed his phone and keys, and with one more quick kiss and a promise to see Buck later, he followed Eddie out the door.

Buck sighed.

As much as he liked the fact that his boyfriend and best friend got on so well, he wouldn't have exactly hated it to spend his night off with said boyfriend instead of watching TV on his own.

He'd only known Tommy for a couple of months but it was getting harder and harder to remember what his life was like without him in it. He didn't particularly want to either.

Just thinking about Tommy made him smile like a teenager with a crush, but lately he was starting to feel like this thing between them was getting more serious. A deeper connection. Not just sex or romantic dates but also being content to just exist in each other's space.

Like spending the night watching the latest movie Tommy insisted he had to watch or trying out a new recipe with Tommy sitting at his kitchen table, keeping him company and being his guinea pig.

It felt a lot like love.

He was pretty sure Tommy felt the same, even if they hadn't actually said it yet.

He really wanted to though, but he was still waiting for that perfect moment. Maybe he'd tell him when they woke up together in the morning.

He smiled to himself as he scrolled through his DVR to find the documentary on bees he'd recorded earlier that week and got comfortable on the sofa as he hit play.

The documentary was interesting enough but still his mind kept wandering. He tried to remember the names of the guys fighting so he could check the score, when his phone suddenly rang in his hand.

He frowned at the screen, not recognising the number. He debated letting it go to voicemail but his curiosity got the better of him.

"Hello?"

"Hello, is this Evan Buckley?"

"Yes, this is Evan Buckley... Who is this?"

"My name is Laura Greenwood, I'm a nurse at Cedars-Sinai Medical Centre, and I'm calling you on behalf of Edmundo Diaz. I have you listed as his emergency contact, is that correct?"

"Yes, yes that is correct. What's going on? Is Eddie in hospital?"

"Mister Diaz has just been brought in following a car accident."

"A what?! Is he ok?"

"His injuries are non life threatening as far as I've been told." the nurse told him in a practised calm voice. "Are you able to come to the hospital?"

"Uh yes, yes I'm on my way." Buck told her, rushing around his loft to grab his stuff and put his shoes on. "Wait... Was there anyone else brought in with him? Is there a Thomas Kinard with him? Was he admitted too?"

"I'm afraid I can't tell you that sir. When you get here you can go straight to the ER and they'll take you to see mister Diaz. Perhaps he will be able to tell you more about any other passengers involved in the accident."

The drive to the hospital was a blur. Eddie was in a car accident... but he'd been in a car with Tommy. They'd taken his truck. So what did that mean for Tommy? Had someone crashed into them? Was Tommy alright? Was he even still alive?

He all but threw his Jeep in the first available parking space he came across, and only just remembered to take the keys out of the ignition and lock it.

The hospital was outside the 118's jurisdiction, so he wasn't as familiar with it as some of the others in the city, but he found the ER with ease after making himself follow the signs.

"But was there a Thomas Kinard brought in too?" he tried with the nurse who was taking him to see Eddie.

"Are you next of kin?"

"He's my boyfriend."

The nurse nodded.

"And are you his emergency contact as well? Or listed as next of kin anywhere?"

"I... I'm... No... We've only been together a couple of months... we haven't had that conversation yet."

The nurse gave him a sympathetic look and Buck knew what she was about to say.

"I'm very sorry, but I can't give you any information if you're not next of kin."

"Right... yeah... I understand..."

"If you know who his emergency contact is, they can update you... or tell us it's ok to tell you."

"C-can... I know you're not allowed to give me any details but... is he here? Is he alive?" Buck tried. "Please. I just need to know he's alive."

The nurse looked at him for a minute, weighing her options, then started typing on a tablet.

"Kinard? K-I-N-A-R-D?"

"That's right."

"He's here." She confirmed. "He's alive. They're working on him. That's all I can tell you, I'm sorry." She started walking again, and Buck had to jog a few steps to catch up with her when his brain had managed to process the information she'd given him.

The nurse pulled open a curtain around a bed and Eddie looked up from the magazine he was flicking through. He looked a little banged up but mostly in one piece.

"Mister Diaz, there's someone here to see you." she stepped aside and Buck made himself walk up to the bed and greet his best friend.

"What happened?" he asked after the nurse had left them to it.

"We got t-boned by some drunk idiot in an expensive sports car." Eddie told him. "Tommy got the worst of it. Have you seen him yet? I figured he'd be higher on your list of priorities."

Buck bit his lip. He was happy to see his best friend was ok, but he couldn't help but worry about his boyfriend.

"They won't let me see him. I'm not family, I'm not his emergency contact, I'm nothing. They called me because of you... All that nurse told me is that he's alive."

Eddie gave him a sympathetic look.

"Do you know who his emergency contact is? Does he have family in LA? Siblings?"

"He was born in LA. His dad still lives in the house he grew up in... But they hate each other."

"Ok so not his dad then."

Buck shook his head.

"He also has a brother but I don't even know his name." he rubbed a hand over his face. "I don't even know the name of my boyfriend's brother." he said dejected. "What if he dies? I don't know his family, I've only met a few of his work friends at Harbor, and I don't know any of his friends outside of work. Nobody would even let me know when the funeral is. I don't even know if he would want a funeral. I barely know my own boyfriend!"

He was spiralling and well on his way to a panic attack.

"Hey, hey, calm down." Eddie did his best to snap him out of it by squeezing his shoulder and making him look at him. "Tommy is not going to die ok? He's the one that called 911 after the accident. He had a head wound and they had to cut him out of the car because his leg got pinned. But he was bitching about his truck getting ruined and how it would take him ages to get it back in working order so he was definitely conscious when they got him out. "

Buck made himself take a few deep breaths to compose himself. Tommy worrying about his car was good. That meant he was awake and conscious enough to know what was happening.

"What kind of head wound? Was it bad?"

"Not as bad as it could have been." Eddie told him after a beat and Buck knew he was choosing his words carefully so he wouldn't freak him out. A move straight from the LAFD handbook.

"What does that even mean? There was no brain matter on the airbag?"

Eddie rolled his eyes at his friend's dramatics.

"The idiot hit Tommy's side pretty hard. Almost flipped us over. We got knocked around the car pretty bad and he hit his head on... something. I don't know, it all happened really fast."

Buck nodded and just about managed to stop himself from shaking Eddie to give him more details.

"I think I passed out for a few minutes... because the next thing I remember is Tommy asking for my phone, well... more like demanding, because he couldn't find his." Eddie continued, scrunching up his face trying to remember more details. "I think he used my phone to call 911... but I don't know what happened to it." He looked around. "They haven't given me my stuff yet."

"I'll go find someone..." Buck moved to stand up but Eddie stopped him.

"The phone can wait. We need to figure out what we're going to do about Tommy."

"What do you mean what we're going to do about Tommy? I'm not family, they won't let me see him."

"I know... but maybe we can figure out a way around that. That nurse from before likes me... maybe if I flirt with her a little she'll tell me what room he's in? Or how he's doing?"

"Just how hard did you hit your head in the crash? I think you have a concussion. That's never going to work."

"Hey, I'm charming and sexy! I'm hot!"

"I've seen you puking up your guts after bad sushi and hungover and praying in Spanish on my bathroom floor after you decided to mix beer and tequila. You are neither charming or sexy."

"Well you try it then! Or maybe one of the male nurses will be easier to persuade."

"I'm not going to flirt with a guy to get info on my boyfriend!" Buck said exasperated and stood up. "I'm just going to calmly talk to the nurses again and explain the situation... maybe they can tell me who his emergency contact is. Maybe it's his brother and I can introduce myself and he can tell me how Tommy is doing."

Eddie mumbled something under his breath but Buck ignored him and went in search for someone who could tell him more about Tommy.

He was almost at the nurses station when he heard a familiar name.

"I'm here for Thomas Kinard. I got a call he was in an accident."

"Are you family?"

"I might as well be." Buck had a clear view of the man now but he didn't recognise him. "I'm his emergency contact. You called me."

"Name?"

"Sal Deluca. Salvatore."

The nurse typed something on her computer.

"He was in a car accident. Suspected fractured pelvis, head laceration, suspected broken ribs and open tibia fracture, as well as suspected ruptured spleen. He's in surgery now." She told the man. "You can take a seat here and someone will come update you when they can."

The man looked like he wanted to argue with the nurse but apparently decided it wasn't worth it and just sat down on a nearby chair and took his phone out of his pocket. He tapped the screen and put the phone up to his ear.

"Hey, it's me." he paused to listen. "No I haven't seen him yet. He's in surgery. Pretty banged up. He's gonna need help when he gets out. We can't let him go back to his place on his own." Another pause. "I don't know, Gina." A slight irritation in his voice. "We'll figure it out when the time comes." another pause and a sigh. "Yeah. I'll call you when I know more. Yeah. Love you too. Bye."

Buck watched him put his phone away and sit back in the chair. It was now or never. He took a deep breath and walked up to the man.

"Hi... uhm... you don't know me but...-"

"Look, man, let me stop you there. If you're the one that hit my buddy and want to clear your conscience now or something, don't bother, I'm not interested. He'll probably forgive you when he's awake, because he's an idiot like that, but don't come to me with that shit."

"What? No. Tha-that's not... I'm Evan Buckley. Tommy is my boyfriend."

The man sat up.

"You're Evan?"

"Yes... Has Tommy mentioned me?"

"Yeah. Hasn't stopped talking about you for the past few months. I feel like I know you better than my own wife by now."

"Oh... I uh... h-he hasn't told me a-about you..." Buck stammered.

"Of course not." The man rolled his eyes. "We've been friends for over 20 years, he's my both daughters' godfather, but he won't tell his new boyfriend about me." he continued sarcastically. "I guess he just wanted to make sure you're not an asshole like the last idiot he dated. Andrew really fucked him up."

"Y-yeah..." Buck agreed, not wanting to let on he didn't have a clue who Andrew was.

The man stood up and offered Buck his hand.

"I'm Sal. Were you in there with him?"

"No, my best friend was. They were going to Vegas to watch a fight." Buck explained and filled him in on the details.

Sal turned out to be easy enough to talk to once he'd decided Buck was alright, and the two of them talked about Tommy, the job, the 118, and the grudge Sal still held against Bobby.

After some time, a tired looking doctor came to update them on Tommy's condition and a nurse took them up to the floor so they could see him.

"One visitor at a time." she warned them.

"You go first." Buck told Sal who shook his head and pushed him towards the door.

"He's not going to want to see me, trust me. You go sit with him, I'll go update my wife."

Buck wanted to protest but Sal was already walking away and tapping his phone screen. He looked through the little window in the door and saw Tommy, looking way too small and frail for a man his size.

His leg was in a cast and there were various bandages around his head and body. He glanced at the monitor beside the bed and watched the lines move with Tommy's heartbeat before gently opening the door and going in.

He grabbed the chair from the corner of the room and sat down as close to the bed he could get. He watched Tommy's chest rise and fall with each breath and carefully took his hand in his.

"Hey... You scared the shit out of me..." he said softly. "I got the call about Eddie and I jumped in my car right away... And Eddie's fine, he'll be alright... But they wouldn't tell me anything about you. I didn't even know if you were alive." He brought Tommy's hand to his lips and brushed a kiss over the knuckles. "When you get out of here, we need to talk." he said and winced at how it sounded. "Not... not like that. I'm not breaking up with you. I just... our jobs are dangerous you know. And next time you get injured on the job... or just... anything happens to you... I want to know what happened. I want to be able to come see you without Eddie thinking he can flirt with a nurse and convince her to let me." He laughed a little. "You know that would never have worked."

The next few hours went by in a blur. Tommy woke up a few times but was way too out of it to have anything resembling a conversation, Sal dipped in and out of the room, and even Eddie had come by to check on Tommy.

The hours turned into days, and the days turned into a week. Tommy's condition had improved enough for him to be moved onto a regular ward and for the dose of the heavy painkillers to be lowered so he was awake for longer periods of time and more aware of what was happening around him.

And also getting more and more annoyed by the fact he couldn't move around as freely as he'd like, practically begging the nurses to get him a pair of crutches even if he was nowhere near well enough for that.

"Hey there sleeping beauty, welcome back to the land of the living. If you wanted to see me that badly, you could have just picked up the phone, you know? You didn't have to crash your car." Sal joked when he walked back into Tommy's room after updating his wife and checking in at work on day 8.

"You know me, always had a flair for the dramatic." Tommy replied and gave him a tired smile. "How are the girls? Evan said you went to call Gina."

"They're fine. Torey wants to come see her uncle T but we talked her down to facetime when you're feeling better."

"Yeah... when these bruises clear up... and the stitches come out. Or can be covered up somehow. I don't want to scare her." Tommy said, gesturing to his head. He was looking a whole lot better than when he'd first been brought in but the bruises were only just starting to fade.

"She's seen you first thing in the morning before you've had your coffee, she can handle a couple of bruises."

Buck sat back and let the two of them talk. He'd gotten to know Sal a little over the past week or so and he liked the guy. Even if he was still kind of intimidated by him.

But it was clear he cared about Tommy and Buck was happy Tommy had a best friend like him. Someone who would drop everything to be there for him. Someone who would always have his back.

Though it was also frustrating that between Sal, the hospital staff, Tommy's crew from Harbor, and various members of the 118, Buck had barely had a moment alone with him.

And he didn't need an audience for what he wanted to tell him.

"I promised Torey I'd take her up to see the lights."

"So save it for her next birthday." Sal argued and Buck realised he'd zoned out and didn't have a clue what they were talking about. "Or wait until she turns 21 and take her to Vegas."

"Oh sure. 'happy birthday sweetheart, you'll get your present in 11 years' I'm sure she'll understand." Tommy said sarcastically and Sal laughed.

"You know she'll remember. And then Bella will want to go too when she turns 21. So you better make sure you get back in that chopper so you can take my girls to Vegas when they're old enough."

Tommy groaned.

"When Isabella is 21, I'll be..." he shook his head. "I don't want to think about that."

Sal sat back in his chair.

"They grow up way too fast." he settled on. "Feels like only yesterday that she couldn't even wrap her little hand all the way around my finger, and now she's talking about inviting boys to her birthday party."

Buck did his best to focus on the conversation, even if he didn't know Sal's family, but he kept zoning out and his eyelids were getting heavy. He hadn't exactly had a good night's sleep at Tommy's bedside, and now the worst seemed to be behind them, the lack of sleep was starting to catch up to him.

"Evan." someone squeezed his hand. "Evan, hey, wake up."

"Wha-what?" he blinked the sleep from his eyes and sat up straighter. "I'm here, I'm awake. I'm here. Are you ok?" he searched Tommy's face for any sign of discomfort or even pain."

"I'm ok. But you just fell asleep sitting up. Why don't you go home to get some rest. in an actual bed."

Buck frowned.

"I'm not leaving you. I'm fine. I just... closed my eyes for a second. I'm fine now, I promise."

"You sound like my daughter when she doesn't want to go to bed." Sal cut in. "She's 8. And I usually pick her up and throw her over my shoulder and take her to bed anyway. So don't try me, Buckley."

Tommy laughed a little but then turned serious.

"Evan, you're exhausted. Why don't you call Howie to take you home. Just for a couple of hours." he pleaded. "I've got Sal here to keep me company, and all these wires stuck to me so they can make sure I'm alright... I'm ok now, I promise. It's your turn to rest now."

"I'm fine." Buck insisted. "I'll get a coffee from the machine later. I'm fine."

"Evan..."

"Tommy, I love you, but please stop trying to get me to leave. I'm not leaving until you are." Buck told him, and brushed a kiss over Tommy's knuckles to emphasise his point.

"Ev... I... You... Did you... mean... that...?"

"I'm not leaving you."

"Not that... the... other thing..."

"The other thing?" Buck mumbled and tried to replay the last part of their conversation in his mind. Tommy, I love you. "Oh... t-that... I..."

"It's ok. You don't have to explain. You're exhausted, I get it. It's fine." Tommy rambled.

"No, I... I... did.. do... mean it. I just... didn't... realise?"

"I'm going to... go buy some cigarettes." Sal said and got up, grabbing his jacket from the back of the chair.

"You don't smoke." Tommy pointed out.

"I'll start." Sal replied and left the room, closing the door behind him and leaving the two men alone.

"Are you cold? Do you want me to fluff up your pillow? Do you want some water? Do you want me to go so you can sleep?" Buck rambled, fussing with Tommy's blanket.

"Evan... tell me... did you mean it? It's fine if you didn't. I can handle it. Just tell me. It's alright. We're just having fun, right? You didn't sign up for all of this. It's fine. You can just go. I'll call you when I'm better. Maybe we can go to that club you found online the other day. I mean, it's gonna be a while before I can dance again but... -"

"Tommy!" Buck interrupted. "Shut up. Please." he carefully sat down on the bed next to Tommy's hip and put his hand on his uninjured leg. "I did mean it. I just... didn't mean to just blurt it out like that. I wanted to make it romantic. Maybe a candlelit meal at home. Some music playing in the background, maybe a nice glass of wine... and then I'd take your hand..." he paused to do just that. "And I'd look into your eyes. And I'd tell you that these past few months have been amazing, That you have been amazing. That you make me happier than I ever thought I could be." he carefully leaned in to press a kiss to Tommy's lips. "And then I'd tell you I love you. I love you so much. And then in a perfect world, you'd say it back and we'd have the best night of our lives."

Tommy smiled.

"That sounds amazing. And I love you too."

"You do?"

"Yeah. It's kind of scary... I've never felt this way about anyone before... and definitely not this quickly... but yeah, yes I do love you Evan."

Buck leaned in for another kiss.

"I really wish we could do more right now. I wish I could hold you." he gently ran his hand up and down Tommy's good arm.

"I know... Me too."

"When you get out of here, I'm going to cook for you. All of your favourite foods. I even found a recipe for spumoni online and I'm going to make it for you." Buck promised. "It probably won't be as good as your grandma's, though, but I’ll settle for second place." he joked.

"I'm sure I'll love it. Because I love you."

"I love you too." Buck replied. "And I could really get used to hearing you say that."

"Good thing I'm planning on saying it a lot then."

[just-dreaming-marvel]

Love That Burns ~ Ending 2 ~ 54

LOVE THAT BURNS MASTERLIST

< previous chapter

Word Count: 2,355ish

Summary: You and Logan struggle interacting with each other.

Notes: Please share reactions! Please remember to review the timeline posted here.

Reminder: I DO NOT do taglists. Please don’t ask. Please follow and interact! I appreciate any reblogs, likes, comments, and asks!

Your healing factor decided to kick into high gear while you were sleeping, which you were grateful for. Your hands were scarred now, but that didn’t matter as long as the burns were gone. Though you knew that it would probably happen again. You worked again today, but not until later, so you decided to go out and run a few errands. As you were locking up the apartment, you heard heavy footsteps coming down the hall. Looking over, you saw Logan with his head down and hands stuffed in his pockets. Having felt someone staring, he looked up and stopped. The two of you just stared at each other for a moment before you decided to speak up.

“Hi,” your voice was quiet, nervous. 

“Hey,” he responded, voice low. “You, uh, you heading to work?”

“Not yet,” you shook your head. “I’m off to run some errands.” Logan nodded. “Where are you coming back from?”

“A walk… needed to clear my head and smoke a cigar in peace.”

Your lips turned up at his words. “I get it.” You walked his way, stopping as you reached his side. “Well, I’ll see you later.”

“Yeah… see you.”

You continued heading down the hallway. You were almost to the stairs when you heard Logan again.

“Hey, Y/N, wait.” You turned around to see him coming towards you. He stopped a few feet away from you. “Mind if I tag along?”

His words took you by surprise and, in all honesty, a part of you wanted to say no. You didn’t know if you could handle running errands with the man who shared your husbands face. But then you looked at him. You could see the nervousness and the war behind his eyes. Logan was struggling too.

“I don’t mind,” you said quietly. “I could… use the company.”

You wanted as Logan’s shoulders relaxed ever so slightly. After a moment, he moved to where you were and allowed you to led him down the stairs and out to the street. The two of you walked in silence, enough space away from one another to prevent from bumping into each other. 

You headed into the first store and grabbed a cart. Logan walked off to the side, grabbing the items you asked him to. It quickly became a comfortable routine from this store to the next. Logan carried your bought items around with ease. After the two stores, you decided that you were done for now and the two of you headed back to the apartment complex. 

“You can place everything on the table,” you told Logan as you opened the door to your apartment. “I’ll put everything away.”

“I can help,” Logan said, heading to the table.

“You’ve already helped. I’m sure that you—“

“Please.”

Your head tilted in curiosity at the tone Logan used. He was practically begging for you to let him help. He turned around and looked at you, eyes shining with something you were very familiar with seeing. Guilt. Something in Logan’s mind was eating away at him and he was trying to do something to take his mind off of it.

“Okay,” you whispered.

The two of you began working together to put items away.

“Where’s Laura?” Logan wondered, having not seen her yet today.

“She’s at a high school down the street. I signed her up for summer classes so that she could finish high school.”

Logan nodded. “That will be good for her. She interested in college?”

“She was, before we were sent to The Void. It hasn’t been a conversation that we’ve had since. I won’t force her into anything. I just want her to be happy. She’ll most likely have her father’s ability to live long, so a long and happy—a fulfilled life is all I want for her. Whatever that may look like.”

“You are a good mother.”

The compliment had you lose your breath for a moment. Once you gathered yourself, you turned away from Logan and focused back on the task. The two of you put the rest of the items away in silence. When everything was put away, Logan stuffed his hands back in his pockets and you finally fully faced him.

“Thanks for all your help,” you said, your lips pulling to a small smile.

“Anytime,” he responded with a nod. He turned to leave.

“Would you… I can make lunch.”

Logan stopped and looked back. “You don’t have to.”

“I think you deserve it after I made you carry everything around for me. Come. Sit.”

He fully turned around. “I can help. Put me to work.”

You shook your head. “No. But maybe I’ll let you do dishes when we’re done.”

“Deal.”

Logan sat down at the table as you got to work in the kitchen. His eyes carefully watched your every moment, lingering on your hands ever so often to check on them and to catch the sight of the wedding ring still on your finger.

“How are your hands?” Logan eventually broke the silence.

You paused, glancing at them. “They’re fine.”

“From, uh… From what I’ve picked up, I thought that you were only in pain when you’ve used your powers. Are you still in pain from The Void? Or was it something else?”

“Something else… I… I don’t really want to talk about it.” Logan let out an understanding grunt as he nodded. “How have you been handling all this? I think that everyone knows it’s not easy for me, but… this has to be really hard for you.”

“Yeah, it’s strange… I’m trying to make the most of it. I… well, you heard, I turned my whole world on the X-Men. I… I failed my friends… my family. And I killed many people… This is a fresh start. I don’t want to mess it up.”

“Well, I think you’re off to a good start, if that means anything.”

“It does… thanks.”

“You’re welcome,” you shot him a smile. “Are you planning on getting a job?”

“I want to, just to keep my mind busy, but it’ll be hard… The Wolverine is, uh, popular.”

“I’m sure you’ll fine something… I can help if you want.”

“I’ll let you know if I need any.”

You nodded and brought two plates over to the table. “Lunch is served.”

“Looks great. Thanks, princess.”

Princess. Now that was a nickname you hadn’t heard in a lot time. It had your mind reeling. Reliving all the times your Logan had called you that. Your hands began trembling as your lungs felt tight, like you couldn’t breathe. Logan immediately noticed the sudden change in you.

“Y/N?” He called. “Are you alright?” He reached for you but you stumbled back, your breaths coming out in labored pants. 

“I— He—You—“ You couldn’t complete a thought without your breathing getting in the way.

It suddenly clicked. Your husband—Your Logan had called you that. “Y/N, I’m so sorry. I overstepped. It just slipped out.” 

Logan stood up and held out his arms like he was calming a timid animal. Your hands were growing hotter, making the whole scenario worse. Logan could see small trails of smoke begin to come from your hands. 

“Y/N, tell me what I can do to help,” he pled. 

“I’m—fine,” you clearly lied.

Logan shook his head. “Tell me what you need.”

“I… Leave… Just… go…”

“Y/N, I can’t—“

“Please! Go!”

Logan stood there and watched as you used the wall to support yourself as you headed down the hall. He didn’t miss the burn marks your hands left on the walls as he watched you disappeared into the bathroom, shutting the door firmly behind you. Logan sighed, shoulders sagging. He couldn’t leave you like this, at least not with your kitchen like this. Logan found food storage containers and placed the lunch in them before placing the containers in the fridge and quickly cleaning up the kitchen. He headed for the door, pausing to look back at the hallway before slipping out.

~~~

You ignored the pain in your gloved hands as you worked. Even sneaking in a few drinks to try to dull the pain and the memory of what happened. You were so embarrassed that a simple nickname sent you into an anxiety attack. After all this time since your husband’s death, you thought that you were more healed than this. But these last few weeks have proven otherwise.

“Buttercup!” Wade yelled across the bar as he entered. He sauntered over to where you were, sitting on a barstool across from you.

“Wade,” you greeted, remaining neutral. “What brings you in?”

“Can’t I visit my favorite fire starter at work?”

“Ssh!! Wade. No one can know. Remember?”

He held his hands up. “Alright. Grumpy. What���s got you all wound up? It’s it the lack of a sex life? Have you not had sex since your husband? How was that by the way? Did you have to do all the work since he was so old?”

“Just shut up, Wade! I’m trying to work.”

He reached over the bar and grabbed your wrist before you could walk away. “Hey. I’m sorry. Seriously. I came to check on you. Apparently it’s something I do now, Savior Of The Universe and all.”

“I’m fine.”

“Yeah, not really buying it. Especially when Logan came back from your place in a mood. He’s finished all the alcohol in the apartment and trust me, Blind Al had a lot of hiding spots that even I couldn’t find. And then there was the fact that Little Wolf came home and freaked when she saw the burn marks on the walls.”

You sighed. “I have a break in ten minutes. Just wait for me in the booth over there.”

~~~

You rolled the beer bottle around on the table, eyes focused on it. Wade sat across from you, watching you silently like he might be able to read your mind.

“It’s not his fault,” you whispered. “I know Logan is feeling guilty. I know it because they’re so similar… He called me a name that Logan—that my husband used to call me. It triggered me. I know he meant nothing by it, but my mind freaked… My powers…” your eyes fell to the gloves. “I’m losing control over them and the pain is getting worse… I shouldn’t have kicked him out the way I did, but I couldn’t help it.”

Wade sighed, pushing down a majority of the inappropriate comments. He could tell that a lot was weighing on you. “Honestly, I probably would have completely combusted.” You laughed, causing Wade to smile. “Logan will get over it. Peanut has his own shit that he’s dealing with while you’re dealing with yours.”

“I owe him an apology.”

Wade scoffed, waving his hand around before taking a sip of his own beer. “Trust me. I’ve read enough Emberine fanfics to know that you never need to apologize to him. No matter where your relationship is at.”

“You weren’t joking when you said you were my biggest fan.”

“I would never lie about something like that, Buttercup. Oh! Maybe when you get home, we can cuddle up and I can read the latest one I found. It’s called, Love That Burns, and a lot of it is eerily familiar to your story. Besides the ending. You died and then Logan went back in time and—“

“Maybe another time. Thanks for coming, Wade.”

“Big Brother Wade to the rescue.”

“I’m a lot older than you.”

He waved you off. “Tis just a number, Buttercup.”

~~~

You were exhausted by the time your shift was over and you got back to your apartment. When you entered, Laura was sitting on the couch working on homework. Her head immediately snapped up to look at you.

“Hey,” you greeted with a small smile, coming over to collapse beside her. “How was school?”

“Fine,” she responded with a huff. “Already have homework.”

“Need any help?”

“Do you?”

You sighed. “Laura—“

“I came home to burn marks on the wall. Do you know how scary that is? I thought… Well, I thought… the worst.”

“Oh, kiddo, I’m so sorry.” You reached over to her but she flinched away, breaking your head. “Laura—“

“I’m just going to go to my room.” She stood quickly gathering all her stuff.

“Laura, please.”

“I’ll see you in the morning. Good night, mom.”

You sighed as she disappeared into her room. You were really killing it today. Leaning forward, your head fell into your hands. You have no idea how long you were like that before there was a knock at the door. Cautious because it was so late, you peeked through the peep whole to see Logan standing there. You could tell that he was nervous and weighed down, emotionally and mentally. You opened the door, causing Logan to breathe a small sigh of relief.

“I’m sorry,” you both said at the same time. 

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” you quickly said before Logan could speak up. 

“But I do. The nickname just slipped.”

“You couldn’t know that it would trigger me. Hell, I didn’t until it did. It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have kicked you out the way I did.”

“I deserved it.”

You chuckled. “We are not going to agree on this, are we?”

“Nope… I’m sorry again. Goodnight, Y/N.” He turned away and headed towards his apartment.

“Hey, Logan,” you called. He paused, turning to face you. “Can we have a redo of lunch tomorrow? I still owe you for carrying everything today.”

He nodded. “Yeah, okay.”

“Great. Goodnight, Logan. And don’t be too hard on yourself.”

You shut the door, leaving Logan in the hallway feeling exposed. Of course you knew that he was eating himself alive. You had married this universe’s version of him. You basically knew him already, yet his universe’s version of you and this version were different in so many ways that he felt you had an unfair advantage over him. But he would allow this to take its time. The strongest friendships always do.

next chapter >

[sapphire-writes]

Lassoed Heart

summary: You're not ready for Billy to leave just yet.

pairing: Billy x fem!Reader

warnings: 18+/NSFW/MDNI - absolute filth with no plot whatsoever, smut, fingering, oral (fem receiving)

word count: 2k

note: belated Christmas gift for my ride or die @undertheorangetree

note: hope you enjoy!

link to other stories from me!

To be notified when I post something new, be sure to follow @sapphire-writes-updates & turn notifications on 💙

“I’ll be heading out now,” Billy calls from the other room. 

You pout, staring at your reflection in the mirror as you begin to get dressed. Always on the move, your cowboy. Restless that one is. You’d spent the night together, carried over the threshold by Billy after a long night out with friends. You’d giggled all the while as he insisted on carrying you from your horse to the door.

“I can walk—” you’d tried to argue, but Billy insisted.

A night of passion and lovemaking ensued, then much too quickly the morning light came to steal him away. Just for the morning he assured you. He had some business to attend and then he’d be back in you arms. 

Still, any amount of parting from him left an ache in your chest.

“Could you come help me first?” you call to him, facing the doorway.

Billy is quick to enter, buttoning his shirt while he does before meeting your eyes. It's only for a moment before his eyes drop to your scantily clad form, jaw slacking. Your cheeks warm as his eyes undress you further. 

“You look…,” he loses whatever words attempted to come to mind as you turn your back toward him, staring at his reflection through the mirror. You watch as he walks toward you, a lion stalking his prey.

His pupils dilate as you shakily inhale, breasts straining against the fabric of your bodice as your heart beats wildly. A new style, showing much more cleavage than you’d been used to. A change Billy seemed to appreciate. 

“Lace me up?” you murmur, a smile twitching on your lips as he staggers the rest of the way forward.

Hesitantly, he reaches for the laces, beginning to string them through the open holes. He pauses for a moment, fingertips caressing the smooth skin of your back. A shiver rolls down your spine, goosebumps rising on your flesh. A moment later he tentatively pulls, drawing the fabric together. 

“Harder.”

His hands slip as you speak, nerves getting the better of him. 

“What?” He asks, nearly choking on the word.

You wet your lips, trying to hide your smile before biting down hard on your lower lip. How you adore teasing him.

“You have to pull harder.”

Billy leans closer, his chin nearly resting on your shoulder as he turns his lips against the sensitive patch of skin just below your ear.

“Like this?” he asks, just as he pulls, causing a gasp leaving your lips, “that hard enough, doll?”

“Yes,” you answer breathlessly, as his lips skim against the skin of your throat.

“You’re sure?” he murmurs, his words finished with a kiss against your neck. 

Your head falls back against him.

“Maybe a little harder,” you murmur. Billy wraps the silk once around his hand, tugging even harder than before. The bodice tightens significantly this time, the strength of Billy’s hands cinching your waist as small as your body allows. 

Billy hums, securing the silk with a finishing bow, lips still pressed against your throat.

“Thank you.”

You sound more breathless than you’d like, gazing at his expression in the mirror. His hands circle your waist, pressing you flush against him. One hand splays over your stomach and his jaw slacks as he meets your gaze. There’s fire in his blue eyes and you can’t help but reach your hand up to caress his face. 

He’s so handsome. Too handsome, really, your vigilante. 

“You’re beautiful,” he says, voice rough as gravel, hands never leaving you, “God, how did I get so lucky?”

“Shouldn’t you be off?” you ask, ignoring his praise.

He doesn’t answer, simply tightens his hold on you, turning you to face him. His hand cups your cheek, the other resting against your lower back. 

“Billy,” you scold, but your tone is teasing as he drags you toward the bed. He backs up until the back of his knees hit the mattress and he sits with a thud, both hands dropping to your waist. 

“I’ll be quick,” he promises, hands already pawing at your stockings, hoisting one of your legs to rest on the bed.

“You’re never quick.”

“You can’t leave me like this,” he argues, rolling down your left stocking, revealing the soft flesh of your thigh, “Think I can leave without having a taste? Didn’t think you were that cruel, darlin’.”

“Oh, I’m cruel, am I?” you counter, unable to stop your smile, nor the shiver that rolls through you as he leans forward, pressing a wet kiss on your inner thigh.

A breathy sigh leaves your lips as his kisses trail inward down your thigh until he reaches the crease of your hip and hums. 

“God damn,” he murmurs, looking up at you, “You drive me crazy, y’know that?”

You bite your lip, nodding your head. His grip on your leg tightens, and suddenly, his arm circles your waist and he flips you onto the bed. You land on your back with a squeal before he’s on you, silencing your startled cry with a kiss. 

Though his hands are rough he fingers grip your waist affectionately, thumbs brushing against your hip bones. He kisses you deeper, slotting himself between your legs, molding his lithe body against yours. 

You can feel his desire pressing against you, hard and wanting as he grinds against you. Billy is never one to put his pleasure before yours. He kisses you once more before traveling lower, pushing your skits around your waist as his head lowers between your thighs.

You feel a sharp pinch and cry out at the sudden burst of pain.

Billy pokes his head up, hair ruffled and a lopsided curious smile on his face. 

“Where’re your bloomers?”

You grab a fist full of your skirts, thighs spread in invitation as you gleefully bite your lip.

“I must’ve forgotten them. You’ve interrupted me, you see.”

Bully groans, shaking his head before he disappears once more. His warm breath on your aching cunt is the first thing you feel before his tongue follows soon after.  A breathless moan escapes you as you feel his lips circle around your sensitive bud, suctioning around it and lavishing it with his tongue. Your legs shake around his head as he continues, slipping his hand beneath your skirts to join in his efforts.

You can’t stop the cry that escapes you when two of his fingers enter you, bullying your sensitive walls in harmony with his tongue; his perfect tongue, so soft and warm as it presses against your most sensitive part with just the right amount of pressure. 

“Oh god—” there’s nothing to do but hold on, to try and anchor yourself to this world by fisting a handful of his brown curls as you come hard, thighs clenching around his head. 

You feel Billy moan in satisfaction as you come down from your high, before he removes his fingers carefully. He sits up and brings his fingers to his mouth, licking each one clean before moving on top of you, capturing your lips in a sensual kiss. You kiss him back for a moment before pushing his shoulders, urging him to lay on the bed. 

“Let me,” you tell him, eager hands working to free his hard cock from his trousers, “I want to.”

Billy swallows, lips parted as you finally grab hold of him and stroke him, before he nods. You straddle him then, lifting your skirts as you position him against your entrance. You bring your face close to his, lips barely brushing his as you sink down, just enough so the tip of him stretches inside you. 

A soft, ragged moan escapes him, his breath mingling with yours as you sink down further; your eyes flutter shut at the stretch, and you try and savor every inch before he bottoms out completely in your warmth. 

“Christ,” he mutters, strong nose pressing against your cheek. You can feel one of his hands leave your waist and press against your lower back. “You alright darlin?”

Sweet of him to always ask. Your Billy is nothing if not sweet. Your eyes open, meeting his. Strikingly blue, nearly translucent in the low light. A clear brook, how you imagine the sea.

You smile, nodding.

“I’m alright,” you assure, rolling your hips. He’s so deep inside of you, you love having him like this. You’ve never felt so full.

“God you feel good,” Billy praises, “My perfect girl.”

You lift your hips, thighs already burning as you lazily ride him. He lets you set the pace for a few moments, hands just resting on your waist and back. But you feel his fingers twitch after a moment, as if he’s incapable of not being an active participant. 

“Billy,” you moan, head thrown back in ecstasy as his hands snake to your ass.

His fingers dig into the soft flesh as he begins to move you, assisting your rocking motion. He kisses you once before his lips travel down the curve of your neck, leaving kisses in their wake. He finally rests atop your breasts, nipping and sucking the soft mounds.

Pleasure winds a strong current in your lower gut, pressure steadily building as he moves in and out in and out.

“That’s it darlin,” he praises, voice a rough moan, “Just like that, there’s a good girl—“

His mouth returns to yours then after following the column of your throat, lips warm and needy as he kisses you. Your hands tangle in his hair, threading through the soft strands that curl at the base of his neck. Experimentally you tug, earning a groan followed by a soft surprised laugh.

“Don’t start something you can’t finish,” he warns, followed by a swift slap to your left ass cheek, leaving a stinging mark in its wake. 

You answer him with another firm tug, his neck snapping backwards. He growls at that, hands securing themselves to your waist as he flips you back onto the mattress. A surprised gasp escapes your lips, transforming into an elongated moan as he picks up the pace. He slams into you, the sound of flesh smacking against flesh the only sound in the room besides your soft cries.

It’s almost too much, feeling him fucking you like this; so deep, so unhurried, just Billy all over you. It’s consuming, the soft warmth of his skin against yours, the intoxicating smell of smoke and leather that clings to him. 

Billy laces his fingers in yours pressing your hands back against the mattress. You whine, wiggling your hips in frustration as his grip never relents.

“I know,” he coos, his tone dripping with condensation. 

He continues pounding into you, pulling away from your lips momentarily to gaze between you. 

“Look,” he says, and you follow his gaze, watching his slick cock pull out of you, before slamming back in, “Look how fucking perfectly you take me.”

Your lips part, a ragged moan escaping you as you continue to watch his thick cock split you open, each time perfectly grazing your sweet spot.

All too soon you feel the familiar tightening in your gut. 

“Billy—“

“Shhh I know, it’s alright darlin just—shit stop clenching or,” his jaw slacks, eyes squeezing shut as your pussy constructs around him with your building orgasm, “fuck, I won’t last—“

“Come with me,” you beg, “Make me cum, make me cum, yes, yes—“ your pleas transform into a guttural sob as you reach your peak, stars exploding behind your eyes.

He follows soon after, a curse leaving him as his cock twitches within your warm walls. His arms shake as he holds himself over you, and you brush some hair stuck to his forehead. 

“Lay with me,” you tell him, arms looped around his neck and pulling him on top of you.

Billy gives in, the weight of him comforting as he rests on top of you, softening cock still buried inside of you. You stroke his hair as he lays with his head on your chest.

“How long will you be gone?”

“Not long,” he assures, “I’ll be back before nightfall.”

“Do you promise?”

Billy hums in agreement, “I’d never lie to you.”

And you know it's true. But it's not Billy’s word that troubles you. There are a million different reasons he might not make it home. But you don’t let that trouble you now. Instead, you hold him close, breathing him in choosing to believe that there’s no reason in the world he wouldn’t come home to you.

likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated but never expected 🩵

[supernaturallyliterate]

I’m rewatching Helluva Boss (yes, already) and I have thoughts:

Season 1 & 2 SPOILERS AHEAD

- Why does Blitz have a lemon tree in his office??

- Blitz has a sign behind his desk that says “Circus”. Possibly a flyer or a ticket from his old circus days??

- Blitz has a panic button for the following things: “More Coffee,” “soiled my pants,” “horny client,” “deranged client,” “client giving birth,” “ghost,” and “Stolas.” It makes me wonder why “soiled my pants” and “client giving birth” are on there. Are these common occurrences??? Also we learn later in Ghost Fuckers that most of Hell doesn’t believe ghosts exist. And it hasn’t been confirmed yet if they do. So that means Blitz had a panic button he’s probably never used, that likely came from his obsession with the show Ghost-Fuckers.

- Blitz has a few of his drawings on the wall in the scene where Loona is holding up the family photo for Moxxie to shoot. It’s two horses kissing (one is clearly a Blitz self-insert horse) and one is a drawing of Fizzarolli with an arrow shot through it.

- Moxxie imitates his dad when he’s talking about the situation in which murder would be okay— “maybe a deranged dad. *Moxxie’s Dad’s Mob Boss Voice* That’s understandable.” SO MUCH FORESHADOW.

- Millie says, “Guilty & innocent is not our business. Killing who we’re paid to is our business. Shoot the target.” And of course this comes back around

- “We could be a bit more selective is all,” Moxxie says about their clients. And in the finale of season 2, we start to see that maybe I.M.P. Will start being more selective.

- When the office catches on fire… Blitz yells at Moxxie but doesn’t have any fear or panic about the fact that it’s a fire. I was watching for any signs of ptsd for the fire but didn’t see any in this scene.

- OMG I JUST SAW BLITZ’S BILLBOARD ADD in the background of a scene. It reads, “Goat an asshole in the Living worlds!? Come to I am Pee!!!??! Make sure you put this sign on the rite side. Don’t fuck this up. Also payment may take a couple weeks because it cums in the Mail. - SPEECH TO TEXT - -Blitzo”. Oh my lord. Honey, no.

- Moxxie probably hesitated to kill the mom of the Murder Family because he was forced to kill his mom.

- Even before the Murder Famiky goes all, well, Murder Family, we see subtle signs of their… murderous tendencies in their decor: a lamp post made out of a human spine and pelvis, a kid’s face mounted to the wall, all the weapons in display, picture frames made out of bones.

- Why did Murder dad switch from a rifle to a glass bottle? Consistency error?

- Blitz 100% has a custom ringtone for Stolas, because he answers the call without checking it, and says before Stolas can talk, “Stolas, this is a really bad time.”

- Stolas calls Blitz by the nickname Blitzy for the first time

- and we get the full moon arrangement!! Stolas: “What if we worked out some kind of exchange? Favors for favors? Doesn’t that sound enticing?” B: “I’m too busy trying not to get fucked in my a.” S: “I’ll keep it simple. Once a month, on the full moon, you return the book to me, followed by a night of passionate fornication. And… you get to keep it all the rest of the time. Sound fair, my little imp?” B: “Fine, whatever!” S: “Oh, Blitz, I’m so excited. I cannot wait to feel your slimy cock inside of me… *continues bleeped out foreplay sexy talk*”

- I noticed that when Blitz and Millie are set on fire by the Murder Mom Martha, Blitz says, “YOUR fire doesn’t really hurt us.” And it made me realize that red/orange fire must be “human fire” and green/white fire must be “hell fire,” which can hurt Imps and other demons

- Blitz pulls out a horse from his coat pocket to make sure it’s okay 🥺

- Moxxie being like, “I’m calling 911 so the earthly authorities will deal with you fairly and justly” and then they blow up the house.

[pinkhearteye]

!!TW!! Yandere, stalking (If you squint ig?), Emotional Manipulation, If i missed any please tell me<3

Yandere Female x reader

The bookstore was quiet, save for the occasional sound of pages turning or the soft creak of the wooden floor beneath your feet. It was your sanctuary, a place where you could escape the chaos of everyday life. Today, you’d nestled into a corner with a stack of books, completely engrossed in your latest find.

Until her voice interrupted.

“That one’s a classic,” she said, her tone warm and honeyed.

You looked up, startled, and found yourself face-to-face with a stranger. She was stunning in an unassuming way, with soft features framed by dark, wavy hair that fell just past her shoulders. Her green eyes sparkled with curiosity as she gestured to the book in your hands.

“Sorry if I scared you,” she added, her cheeks tinged pink. “I’m just… a bit of a bookworm myself.”

“No, it’s fine,” you said quickly, offering her a polite smile. “Do you like this one?”

“Love it,” she said, sliding into the seat across from you without waiting for an invitation. “I’ve read it a dozen times. It’s one of those stories that feels like it’s speaking directly to your soul, you know?”

Her enthusiasm was contagious, and before you knew it, you were chatting like old friends. She introduced herself as Elise, and the two of you spent hours discussing everything from favorite authors to the best places to find coffee in the city. By the time the sun began to set, you realized you hadn’t even noticed how much time had passed.

“I’d love to keep talking,” Elise said as she stood to leave. “Here—give me your number? We can meet up again soon.”

Her smile was so genuine, her demeanor so inviting, that you didn’t think twice. You handed over your phone, and she typed in her number before giving it back with a wink.

“I’ll text you,” she promised.

____________________________________________________________

At first, her messages were sweet and thoughtful. Elise seemed to have an uncanny knack for remembering little details about you, like the way you took your coffee or the obscure author you’d mentioned in passing. She’d send you quotes from your favorite books, or pictures of a cozy reading nook she’d stumbled across.

“Just thought you’d like this,” she’d write, and you couldn’t help but smile.

But as weeks went by, her attention became more… intense. She’d message you constantly, often before you even had a chance to reply to her previous texts. If you didn’t respond right away, she’d send follow-ups, her tone shifting from playful to concerned.

“Are you okay?”

“Did I say something wrong?”

“Please let me know you’re alright.”

When you finally did reply, she’d act as though nothing had happened, flooding you with cheerful messages as if to make up for her earlier worry.

The first time she showed up unexpectedly, it was almost endearing. You’d mentioned being at your favorite park, and minutes later, there she was, holding two cups of coffee and wearing a smile that could light up the world.

“I thought I’d surprise you,” she said, handing you a cup. “I hope that’s okay?”

You’d nodded, a little caught off guard but touched by her thoughtfulness.

But then it happened again. And again. Elise seemed to know where you’d be before you even told her. She’d always have a perfectly reasonable excuse—“I was in the neighborhood,” or “I just had a feeling you’d be here”—but the coincidence started to feel… unsettling.

One evening, as you were settling in at home, your phone buzzed with a text from Elise.

You looked beautiful today.

You frowned, glancing around your apartment as if she might somehow be there. You hadn’t seen her all day.

Were you following me? you typed, your heart pounding.

Her reply came almost instantly.

Of course not! I just saw your picture on social media. You’re so photogenic.

You hadn’t posted anything.

____________________________________________________________

The next time you saw her, you tried to set boundaries.

“Elise, I think you’re great, but… this is moving a little fast for me. I need some space.”

Her expression faltered for the briefest moment before she plastered on a smile. “Of course,” she said sweetly. “I understand.”

But her actions didn’t match her words. If anything, her presence in your life grew more overwhelming. She’d leave little gifts at your door—a book you’d mentioned wanting to read, your favorite snacks, a handwritten note that said, Thinking of you.

One night, you came home to find Elise sitting on your doorstep. She looked up at you with tear-streaked cheeks and a trembling smile.

“I just… I needed to see you,” she said, her voice cracking. “You’re the only one who makes me feel like this.”

Your heart ached at the sight of her so vulnerable, but a small voice in the back of your mind warned you that this wasn’t normal. Still, you couldn’t bring yourself to push her away completely.

_______________________________________________-__________

Over time, you realized the truth: Elise wasn’t just kind or attentive—she was consumed by you. Every word, every gesture, every glance you gave her seemed to fuel her devotion. And while part of you was flattered, another part of you knew this wasn’t healthy.

But Elise didn’t see it that way. To her, you were perfect. You were hers. And no matter how far you tried to run, she’d always find a way to bring you back.

After all, she’d promised.

“I’ll always be here for you,” she’d whispered one night, her arms wrapped tightly around you. “No one could ever love you the way I do. And I’ll make sure you never forget that.”

[yeonmuse]

`✦ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ Curtain Call ·˚ ༘

ᥫ᭡ f!reader x lee heeseung ── 𝒢enre. Uni au. fluff, non idol enha. feats. ot7 [reqs are open] ᝰ.ᐟ 𝓁ibrary 🪷

authors notes This is a follow up to Heeseungs side story in Can You Hear My Heart. It takes place directly after the final chapter of Jungwons Mini Series. This is not a Hee X Reader series, but if youd like to replace the characters name with your own feel free to. This is part of admins University series

IN WHICH 𖤓 Heeseung has a thing for the theaters golden girl, he’s been crushing on her for months. He’s got it so bad for her that he somehow lets Jake talk him into attending auditions just to get closer to her.

Join the taglist here

Everyones invited

Heeseung meant what he said when he tweeted that he’d be going to that party, though the party itself was quite exclusive he along with his friends had already scored secure invites. Him having been friends with the boyfriend of the party host, besides since nicholas had cancelled his party, what better way to spend their time then at a party where he could finally see her outside of just practice or they’re occasional bump ins on campus.

He along with everyone else from the operationXO group chat would be attending, everyones invited, though if only they knew tonight was about to take a turn for the worst.

As they all arrived the house had already been completely packed, his first time at a penthouse suite yet all he cared about was finding her, his priorities sure did change. As he spots the pink fuzz of her hoodie which he had seen in the photos she had taken, he takes a few steps forward only to stop dead in his tracks as his eyes fall upon her smiling and laughing with two other girls, and one girl he knew all too well, Rena.

Sakoia must have sensed his presence because he had been preparing to turn himself around and walk away before he could be seen. She spotted him standing there.

“Heeseung?” He curses under his breath before looking up at her rubbing the nape of his neck.

“Koia, didn’t think I’d see you here. You didn’t strike me as the party type.” He was lying through his teeth, he had seen her posts enough by now to know when it came to her friends she was out often.

“Guess there’s a lot you’ve got to learn about me, Lee Heeseung.” She laughs and jerks her head into the direction of each of her friends as she introduces him to them.

“Ladies this is Heeseung, Heeseung this is Yuan, Nezza and Yuan's friend Rena.” No one else had seemed to notice but by the time Sakoia had introduced Rena, she had already been staring at him. This was painfully awkward and awfully troubling for him, the woman he was once in love with, the one that broke his heart, standing right across from the girl he had been trying to pursue for the last 5 months.

“Nice to meet you all.” He tried his best to play it cool, act as if he didn’t remember her, but she was well aware that he remembered, and he also knew very well from the way he looked at her alone, that he had a thing for Sakoia, because the same way he looked at Sakoia was how he once looked at her.

“I didn’t know you’d be here tonight? Are the girls and the others here too?”

“Yeah we all came, Wonbin gave us an invite since Nicholas had to cancel his party. Congratulations on your release by the way, Nezza.” Truth be told he didn’t know a lot about nezza since the two had only met a handful of times, on the other hand he had known wonbin for years, the two of them having lived across from one another for years in their high school and middle school days.

“Thanks Hee, he’s upstairs probably playing pool in the foyer with some of the guests.”

“Sounds like I should be joining them, but I’ll catch you a little later?” He responds looking at Sakoia.

“Come find me later?” She responds with a smile on her face, he nods in response before disappearing into the crowd.

The moment Sakoia turned around she was met with amused faces.

“Lee Heeseung? You’re hanging out with him and his friends now?” Nezza was the first to mention the obvious elephant in the room, as long as she had known wonbin she had known about Heeseung, she had only met him and his friends a handful of times but it was enough times to know that they were a fun but chaotic bunch. As sweet as Heeseung was, she knew very well that he was the type to leave them, not love them, and it was obvious that his sights were set on her.

“I won’t say hanging out with his friends, I’ve only met them all once at his friend Jungwons Film event, other than that I only just met the girls but we’ve been hanging out occasionally.”

“All I got from this was that there are other women stealing my wife away.” Yuan complains and wraps her arms around Sakoia earning a laugh from sakoia and Nezza, while Rena just sat and observed.

“Just be careful with him, he’s not the type to talk to a woman just because he wants to be friends.”

“Nezz don’t read too much into it like you always do, we’re only friends, he’s a cast member now so I’m sure he just wants to get to know me better since we’re working together, it's only natural to do that right?”

“I don’t even know the guy, but the way he looked at you was not how a costar looks at their costar.”

“Yuan. Seriously you both are reading too much into it.”

Knowing that she had caught Heeseungs eye made her look at Sakoia in a different light. She scanned the girl from head to toe, she had to give it to Heeseung, he sure knew how to pick them, she was beautiful, stunning, but was she really his type?

While the girls remained in the kitchen chatting and gossiping about their life outside of campus, Heeseung joined the others upstairs, half out of his mind from the fact that now only the girl he currently had a thing for had been there, but so was Rena, of all places he could run into her, of all the people he could have seen here it was her.

“You look like you just saw a ghost” Wonbin chuckles as he leans over the pool table for his play.

“Maybe he ran into Sakoia.” Sunghoon teases, warning a slap on the arm from yn who had been sitting on jungwons lap.

“Oh I definitely saw her, she and her friends were gagging a nice conversation before I met them in the kitchen, a conversation with Rena.”

“Oh shit she's really here?” Sunghoon was sent into a fit of laughter that only made Heeseung roll his eyes in response.

“That bitch is actually here? Why ?” Sunoo absolutely hated her, there was no one in the group that hated her more than he had, not even Heeseung himself.

“Apparently she knows both of Koias friends and she was invited, Koia doesn’t seem to know her. I'm guessing they met for the first time today.”

“I saw the whole interaction on twitter, I just didn’t think she would actually be coming, that's insane.” Sunghoon chimes in as he takes his shot on the billiard table.

“Am I missing something? Who is this girl and why do we hate her exactly?” Yn had been the only one left out of the loop, for as long as the guys had known each other they all knew that she was someone that they didn’t speak of. There was a mutual hatred for the girl that each of them had had since senior year in high school.

“Shes Heeseungs Ex”

🔖 @sol3chu @butterflywonz @jwonistic @squiishymeow @river-demon-slayer @lillotus17 @dreeki @jiamini @st4rryst4r @firstclassjaylee @right-person-wrong-time @heesallure

Chapterlist | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

[badolmen]

I’m trying to find a way to articulate this without sounding like a condescending asshole.

[scorchrend]

i spent the whole day making this cover and the art and i like koffin-k like an Average Person would. A Normal Amount. btw here’s the youtube link

art w/o title

[zorosdimples]

knowing i should take a step back from tumblr for my own wellbeing vs. being emotionally attached to this app and the people on it

[iwaasfairy]

please don’t send me asks about anyone in high school in sexual situations (or younger istfg)

I’m not ever gonna write high schoolers or high school gojo or nothin. thank you

[silvertherogue715]

hello! How are you doing? Feeling any better since you caught that cold? This ask is gonna be about Sunstar mainly so I’m gonna split this up into different parts based on the questions. Knowing that Duo attacked and badly injured him I’m curious as to why? Was it cause of the bad emotions that he gave off and effected the other stardroids? Or just a chance encounter that didn’t go well? And does he just stay at one NEC or does he get the other one?

Emotions and relationship wise: Does the NEC still effect his emotions or are they more apparent then before because he only has one of the NEC he had originally? Does this change his behavior in anyway than what he was like originally? Especially his relationship with Terra and Minx(the last ask with his and Does he have any other relationships with the stardroids or know any Navis?

knowing that he’s the leader of the stardroids what does he do exactly?

with his ability being effected by emotions which sorts of emotions cause a increase in heat? Excitement, love, anger, etc. and just an angsty thought that came up has he ever out of instinct tried to grab someone out of panic or reflex and ended up burning them instead? (I assume he’s very careful but the concept of it happening to anyone(Minx, Terra, stardroid) is just a curiosity)

I hope you’re doing well! Have a good day/night! Thank you

I'm doing much better now, thank you! I don't get sick often, so I was a bit caught off-guard, but it also happened right before break when a bunch of assignments were nearing their deadlines. 

Hopefully I'll be able to dedicate way more time to shoveling out Brainrot AU stuff now.

This is a long one! I'll post my answers below the cut.

Why did Duo attack?

There’s a lot of lore for Duo in my AU, but I'm gonna try to simplify it here.

It’s canon in the MMBN anime that Duo began to see his creators and their civilization as evil, and that he eventually destroyed all life on Earth during that time before leaving on a rocket that mimics the appearance of a comet (which is powered by Negative Energy).

In my AU, he sees all NEC-Navis as inherently “evil.”

He uses this comet to approach sources of “evil,” and gives any intelligent life he comes across a “test” to determine whether or not they as a whole are evil and should be destroyed. This also means that Sunstar and the Stardroids are always on his radar. They have clashed several times.

Duo is the first and only Viren Navi with 5 GV-Crystals in his body, and Sunstar only absorbed the extra 3 NE crystals in his body to stand a chance against Duo when no other NE-Navi could. Unfortunately, he had no idea the consequences would be so dire, and was too far gone to stop by the time he realized.

Does he just stay at one NEC?

No. Sunstar is reduced to one NEC after Duo’s attack, but he does eventually regain up to 4 out of the 5 total.

The stardroids secure the two that go into his forearms before arriving to Earth.

Terra obtains the fourth, one of his original two that go in his chest, from Ra Moon after the Stardroids arrive on New Earth.

Minx finds the 5th later..but that’s not important right now =) 

Sunstar was never ”woken up” after the attack from Duo until Terra restored his other original NEC from Ra Moon inside his chest. All the Stardroids knew of the possible side effects from either losing or receiving damage to an Energy Crystal: there had been plenty of personal and historical references to use.

Had they activated him with one NEC, Sunstar would have been missing a huge chunk of his memories. In addition to this, he would have felt his emotions with an all-new intensity that he was unfamiliar with. Think of a usually calm and intimidating individual getting reduced to tears on a regular basis or verbally lashing out after an insult that wouldn’t have normally phased him. Positive side effects would be a temporarily clear mind and non-firey hands, but the downsides outweighed them tenfold. 

The change would definitely put a strain on his relationships. It’d be like having to learn about a person all over again.

What are his relationships?

Most Earth Navis Sunstar is familiar with he has met through/with Minx when he was still “Ra Moon.” He couldn’t/wouldn’t make many friends for several reasons, but some notable cases include:

Napalmman: Both love to talk about their respective netops (Nenji/Minx), and their shared love for explosions and anything fire-related. Friend!

Also occasionally talks with some coworker Navis Napalmman is friends with.

Sprout: Carson’s hilariously underwhelming but overpowered normalnavi. Carson is one of Minx’s older brothers, and due to plot reasons, Sprout is the only other Navi Ra Moon would see occasionally when Minx was a child.

Shadowman: Frenemies. He and Miyabi tried kidnapping him several times at one point, and Ra Moon loves to tease/annoy him whenever he gets the chance.

Shademan: Hate. Can and will fight on sight.

Forte/Bass: Sympathetic, but best to avoid. His relationship with Dr. Cossack (manga-based) is semi-mirrored by his relationship with Minx.

As for the other Stardroids…I hate to admit I have not thought of many specific interactions between Sunstar and all of them. This is the perfect opportunity to brainstorm though! Hmm..

Saturn would likely be chilly to Sunstar given his crush on Terra. Sunstar would probably dislike his poor work ethic and pull the occasional prank on him.   

Venus looks up to him, and while Sunstar finds her adorable, he regularly gives her physically harder tasks (like leading training sessions) to satiate her pride.

Sunstar is practically the only one who interacts with Mars–they both have a mutual understanding of the other, as each were deemed “monsters” by the Viren civilization. I wouldn’t describe them as friends, though.

Mercury annoys him to hell and back and Sunstar does his best to station Mercury as far away from himself as possible. 

Jupiter is one of the only Stardroids who will actively seek out Sunstar without going through Terra first. He has a deep respect for Sunstar’s strength, and finds him less intimidating due to his friendship with Uranus.

Uranus is terrified of Sunstar but plays it off with bravado by challenging him to fights. He has yet to win.

Sunstar likes Pluto and Jupiter maybe the most due to their sort-of friendship with Terra. Also, because Sunstar is absolutely a cat person.

I’ll need to think further on some of the other ones.

What does he do?

Sunstar was created to serve as a symbol of protection for Virens, but more importantly for NEC Navis. He shadowed Terra for three major things:

How to lead as a representative for NEC Navi’s

How to observe and deal with hostile rival alien civilizations that may pose a threat to specific Viren settlements 

How to prevent and manage NE-Navi-related disputes while striving for a positive social image

Admittedly, Sunstar shadowed Terra for a majority of his time after being created. He very rarely acted without first consulting or collaborating with Terra first. Terra had both more knowledge and experience than him, but he also commanded more trust and respect from the population and other Viren leaders/council members.

Before Duo mutinied against the Viren civilization on Earth, Sunstar wanted to implement at least two policies/practices:

Raising awareness of and liquidating misinformation surrounding the nature of Negative Energy Crystals and NE-Navis.

The removal of exclusively positive or negative energy crystals.

He had proof it was possible for a hybrid design.

Now, though?

His ship is stranded on Earth with Duo no doubt closing in. The civilization that he was responsible for previously before is dead. The only thing he can do is try to protect the life he has secured on New Earth with friends and family, new and old. 

--

After reawakening with 4 NECs, Sunstar proceeds to lose the 2 in his forearms during a battle on Earth soon after re-arriving. They get shattered in the heat of the battle, and a decent chunk of Arc 2 is spent hunting down the shards before Duo can arrive.

What emotions cause an increase in heat?

Emotions like anger, fear, sadness, or any combination of those that can leave him feeling overwhelmed. Again, Sunstar’s emotions are more muted than regular NE-Navis, given he has two NECs. That means whatever he’s feeling has to be pretty intense for it to affect him so deeply, but he is most prone to anger out of any other ‘provocative’ emotion. 

Also! He kind of hates how his hands can be a “tell” for him. He may have a stoic persona, but there’s only so much you can hide behind an empty stare, or later, a mask, without your furiously flaming hands giving you away.

Has he burned someone accidentally?

Grabbing and shaking you. I love your brain. He absolutely has.

It doesn’t happen often anymore, not like when he was first created, but my god does it devastate him when it does. He knows what happens when he touches things: they burn. He can’t help but ask himself, why does he still slip up? He knows his loved ones know it is never out of malice, that it’s an accident, that they forgive him, but he finds it hard to forgive himself. 

It’s safe to say Sunstar has accidentally burned nearly all of the Stardroids at least once. For specific people, though?

Uranus: weirdly enough he wants to fight Sunstar hand-to-hand. Close combat is his forte, and he wants to prove he’s strong enough to push through and kind of foe–or pain.

Mercury: he is absolutely enough of an annoying bastard for Sunstar to chase him down on several occasions until he either hands over whatever he has stolen from another Stardroid, apologizes to whoever he pissed off, or mans his station.

Terra: multiple times back on Viren Earth. A few scenarios:

Sunstar grabbing Terra by the shoulders to protect him from falling debris

Sunstar accidentally burned Terra when the latter passed him something by hand.

Without thinking, Sunstar tried holding Terra’s hand during a wholesome moment for both.

Minx: (so far) twice.

Minx tried holding his hand, thoughtlessly.

Sunstar grabbed and pulled Minx by the arm to prevent her from wandering into oncoming traffic at night.

He always apologizes profusely, but has a bad habit of isolating himself for hours and sometimes days afterwards.

He was apologizing for months afterwards.

[javierduffy]

ohh javieran … javieran post kieran’s death .., javier is a poor lonesome cowboy in america a long way from home with no more sweetheart to sit and talk with him ooohhh can anyone hear me ….

[leonardalphachurch]

okay that’s done. no commentary for the news posts bc those are just news.

[i-can-not-art]

Okay so this is the most personal and parasocial I’ll (hopefully) ever get on my stupid art blog, but I think there’s someone out there like me who might need to hear this:

idk if I’m happy with the way I’ve reached 300 followers.

Not that I’m ungrateful, I’m extremely happy, I understand that 300 whole people decided they liked my art enough to bother to follow me and I just made a shitpost of catboy five pebbles to celebrate. But honestly I don’t know if the way I got those followers is the way I want to continue doing art

Those followers mostly came from my lmk and rain world fanarts, but the reason I draw so much fanart of those communities is because I saw how many more notes those posts got than my oc ones.

Before I’d basically if not actually just only draw oc art. Art felt so much more fulfilling when I just drew those little goobers in my head than now. Now I feel like I’m making art for this audience I’ve artificially manufactured by posting what they want to see.

It doesn’t feel like I’m creating for myself when that’s the whole reason I got into art. Plus, all my favorite blogs and mutuals post like pure oc art which I why I think they’re my favorites and mutuals, their art is what they want to make.

That’s what I want my art to be like, just what I wanted to create.

But, tldr: I think I’ll be making and posting more oc art

[j-crow]

stalking peoples blogs is soooo entertaining