#I’ll learn to paint too eventually
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austajunk · 2 years ago
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Here. Take some finger doodles on my phone of Kanaya and Vriska.
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fraberry-stroobcake · 2 years ago
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why does this blow my mind 🤯 HOWWWWww how are you so good AAAaA
Hi there! I just discovered your blog and I love your art, I was wondering how you do your backgrounds? They're all so beautiful! Especially the aurora borealis and the forests :)
Thank you so much, I am glad to hear that you like my backgrounds so much!! 💕 This progress gif is of a painting I made in 2020 but I think it still showcases the individual steps quite well :3
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I usually start with looking up a photo reference that'll help me lay out rough shapes and colors before I paint over the entire thing with textured brushes, add details and adjust the color harmonies using filters and correction layers
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bunny584 · 7 months ago
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For I Have Sinned ୨୧ Chapter II
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“Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave.” Songs of Solomon 8:6-7.
As newly appointed Duchess-To-Be, you have much to learn. Etiquette, conduct and eventual motherhood are the pillars you are expected to live by. Because who cares about your choosing?
The Chapel, tended to by a mercurial Priest, is the perfect refuge.
…right?
Pairing: Geto x female reader
A/N: The is dedicated to the artist ( @captainsalsaa ) I mean look at our fallen Angel. His tears. His frustration. Dear GOD.
To the artist: I stared at your piece, then heard a specific song on my writing playlist then wrote the entire last scene in one sitting. To date, it’s my favorite scene in my author’s portfolio. I hope I did our fallen Angel justice. Thank you for creating this 🤍
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CHAPTER II: Hello, Father.
“Awake early, little dove.” 
Warm hands caress your shoulders. A welcome contrast to the chilly nautical dawn. The sun still has a ways to go, but songbirds have begun their wake up call. 
“As are you, Arella.” 
Your eyes float to your favorite maiden standing above you. No more than a handful of years older, but with a heart for you as if she raised you from birth. 
“It’s my duty to tend to you, is it not?” 
Soft laughter harmonizes with the nightingales. A quick kiss on your forehead before her warmth disappears off the balcony —  undoubtedly to go retrieve a treat of some kind. 
She’s not wrong. 
Technically it is her duty. 
But Arella is your blessing. 
Matting and kneading your surroundings to fit your needs. Eager to dampen the growing pains of settling in a new home. 
Constant hellos. 
Permanent smiles.
Not too wide, like a promiscuous woman. But not too tight, like a cold prude. 
Rooms to tour. Hands to shake. Garments to pin and tie and lace around your lungs as if your God-given ribcage was a frivolous extra not needed for life. Not needed to breathe. 
Breathe.
Your lids screw shut. Pulling in as much of the balmy, saltwater breeze gliding up the steep rock face along the overhang. 
Much like he did. 
The Chaplain. 
His hair cascading down his back in the same way poets monologue when inspired. His eyes a mural of what the Gods paint when they want to show off. 
The way earth acquiesces to his touch as if he is the Creator. The birds choose to perform for him every morning. And the ocean exists to bathe him. 
You cannot decide if the sorbet sunsets are created by the Chaplain. Or if the Gods fight over who gets the honor of painting him a new one each evening. 
“Sleep still escapes you, precious girl.” 
It does, but not for the reason she thinks. 
“You worry too much, Arella. I’ll adjust soon.” The tea she brought you is delicious.
The both of you cross back into your quarters. The stagnant, perfumed air suddenly suffocating.
“I would like to go to the chapel garden.” 
A quiet declaration that stills your handmaiden in her tracks. Then a small grin blossoms on her beautiful face. Fussing with your bedding. Wiping away evidence of your sleepless night. 
“For the flowers that bloom, little dove? Or for the God that tends to them?”
The blood in your veins runs subzero. 
“Arella! I am engaged to be marri—“
“Of course you are. But eyesight isn’t a sin.”
Another moment of feigned irritation before you burst into a fit of childish giggles. The both of you no better than school girls, covering your mouths, stifling your laughter. 
“I just wanted to see you smile.” Arella gestures to your extravagant dresser across the room. 
“In the second drawer you can find a casual garment. Come back with at least one hour to prepare for Mass.”
     · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · 
A hummingbird chaperones your walk to the church estate. Dulcet hums drown out the rattling heartbeat between your ears. 
This is harmless.
It is not a sin to take in Earth’s natural candy. To appreciate God’s gift to humanity.
In all of his majestic glory. 
Your eyes dart around as if your thoughts are a tangible scroll. Written in ink for the world to see.
Don’t be ridiculous, there’s no one around. 
Just you. Your fluttering companions (both heart and bird). The waking sun. God above and his plants swaying in the gentle gusts of wind. You’re safe in your mind. 
Until he decimates all logical and reasonable train of thought, that is. 
You should be angry. Infuriated. That no one adequately prepared you for seeing the demigod for the first time. Even now, you question whether he’s flesh and blood. 
Maybe an illusion? 
The Lord playing tricks from his throne? 
The mirage before you halts your paces. You can’t help but question your level consciousness. 
Because this must be a dream. 
“Oh, don’t be cruel.” 
Words slip out of your mouth, currently ajar. It’s not your place to chastise the One above, but come on. 
Your eyes taste the Chaplain for a second time and this course is even more decadent than the first. 
There he stands. 
A raven waterfall down his broad, muscular back. Half of it tied away from his face. Olive skin so rich the surrounding plants pale in comparison. Russet brown working pants hang loose around his tapered waist, but snug around his thighs. Various tools hooked in the belt loops. Heavy mahogany work boots match the worn leather gardening gloves fitted to his hands. 
His hands. 
Reaching for thorny vines plaguing his hydrangeas. Even at your distance you could detail each muscle fiber in his arm tense and release with every pull and toss.
Pull and toss.
Pull and toss. 
You would have gotten lost in his rhythmic trance, if it weren’t for the symbol branded in charcoal sprawling his back. The emblem peeks through his thick hair, every now and again. 
A spear? 
No.
A trident. With waves snaking up its stalk along his spine. 
His gravitational pull is overwhelming. Your feet move with more stealth than the King’s Guard.
“Working on the Day of Rest, Father?” Casual, measured. 
“Duchess,” Saliva pools in your mouth. His smile teases your ears before he graces you with it. 
“I have to start being more careful about my clothing.” A playful glint in his eyes. 
“Especially now that I’ve been blessed with a fellow greenskeeper.” 
He is a man of God.
And would never insinuate anything impure. 
But that doesn’t stop your cunt from clenching around his words steeped in a baritone potent enough to rumble the ground beneath you.
“I’m sorry. I should’ve sent word that I was coming.” 
“This palace belongs to you, Duchess. You are welcome here at any hour.” His hand captures a vine and tosses it into the pile without his eyes ever leaving yours. 
You are weak.
And greedy. 
The way your gaze drops to his arm. Desperately etching its contours into memory. Seconds, maybe minutes pass before you realize you were gawking. And the Chaplain just let you. 
Head cocked to the side. Soft smile ghosting his full lips. 
“Would you like to finish the tour of your new playground?” 
“Y-yes. Of course, please.” Stumbling over the uneven cobblestone in your voice, you turn away to begin the coordinated stroll. The Priest slides his arms into a linen button up. Lazily fastening two center buttons only. 
He informs you of the work that has already been done, what’s left. Where the soil is richest, where it is the most acidic. How the sun hits certain flowers at each hour of the day.
Brilliant. 
With complete command over God’s bouquet. The sun following him wherever he steps.
“Did you enjoy your swim today, Father?” Both you and the Priest come to a slow stop. One of his angular eyebrows raised.
“I’m dry, Duchess.” He responds with a low, hypnotic chuckle. 
Heat floods your cheeks. How could you be so presumptuous?
“What gave me away?” 
Your knees nearly betray you. The razor sharp grin on his face could cut glass. 
“You were born for the ocean. Or rather, the ocean was born for you.”
Your statement is greeted with blaring silence. 
Lava in his gaze. Singeing every part of your face it touches. His expression is like a foreign language. 
“I—I’ve overstepped, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend. Clearly I have much to learn about social graces.” A meek apology bubbles out of your lips. Desperate to fill the space between your bodies. 
The mercurial man shakes his head slightly. Thawed out from your statement, he reaches over and plucks a stray lilac petal resting on your crown.
“My father used to say the same.” He muses, looking away for the first time. 
“Your father! Is he—“
“He was called home some time ago.” This smile is soft. Reminiscent. Polite, but his mind clearly elsewhere. 
“Oh Father Geto, I’m so sorry.” 
A foot in your mouth is not enough punishment for your indecency. Why would you go prodding like this?
“Don’t be, I’ll see him again. Soon enough.”
“Not too soon, I hope.” The statement draws a stunned gaze from the Chaplain. Eyes dancing between yours. 
“Time to prepare for mass, little dove!” Arella’s melodic call tethers you back down from outer space. 
You flicker over to her with a ruby dusting over your nose and cheeks. Like a child caught with her hand in a cookie jar before supper. 
“Happy Sunday, Father!” Arella calls out, cheshire grin on her face deepening your crude blush. 
“Indeed, Arella.” He returns the greeting while keeping his eyes on you. 
“Send my regards to the Duke.” His voice lowers, for your ears only. With a nearly imperceptible edge to his tone. 
“Happy Sunday, Duchess. We have a counseling session scheduled late afternoon, yes?” 
A statement of pure black and white fact. And yet it travels down your spine and settles between your legs. Wet heat dampening your thin negligee.
“Yes, Father. Happy Sunday.”
     · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · 
Mass was miserable. 
Your corset laced tight enough to meld your two lungs and beating heart into one entity. To say the neckline strangled you is putting it mildly. Cold, uninviting pews dug into your skin at every turn. 
Wretched. 
But the worst of it wasn’t the thin, oxygen-deficient air. Or the shards of glass that slid down your throat with every swallow. Even the jaw pain from tensing your lips in a well-mannered smile for two hours straight was tolerable. 
The worst part of it was him. 
The Priest mesmerized an entire congregation to an ear-splitting hush. 
His first Sunday mass since appointment and nearly everyone in the country and every surrounding province stuffed into the chapel. 
So desperate for blessings from Father Geto. 
Could you blame them?
His voice danced in and out of the pews listlessly. 
Soothing fussy children. Adolescent girls and their mother’s alike — utterly smitten. Adolescent boys experienced their first “I want to be like him” with their fathers sitting right next to them. Husbands glanced feverishly at the women in their lives. 
He had to have noticed it. And yet, he floated above it all the entire service.
Above you. 
Refusing to gift you those eyes that put Vincent Van Gogh to shame. No matter how much you shifted in your seat and straightened your spine.
The Priest spoke to everyone in the room but you. 
Did you read him wrong? 
Did you misinterpret your budding friendship? 
Does it…should it even matter?
Your irritation is palpable. Innocent bystanders are caught in your friendly fire. Including Arella, who changed you out of that horrid costume. And sweet Noel, who ushered you into the seating area — just outside of the good Father’s office.
You make a mental note to send treats to the tender-hearted alter boy. And to apologize profusely to your handmaiden. 
“You are a million miles away, darling.” The sound of your betrothed tows you out of the storm clouds. 
You flicker over to the Duke. Emerald green eyes, high cheek bones — handsome in a way that is characteristic of everyone native to your new home.
“I’m right here, Ezra.” 
“Are you, sweetheart?” The back of his hand caresses your cheek. 
“Mmhm.” You offer your future husband a weak smile and kiss on his cheek. His eyes  faltering slightly, undoubtedly hopeful for lips instead. 
“Good afternoon, Duke and Duchess Ahriman.” 
Father Geto’s velvet greeting encases you both. If Ezra’s arm didn’t guide you to stand you would have been paralyzed in your seat. 
“Father Geto, a pleasure. Thank you for seeing us.” Ezra offers a genuine smile and handshake. Buying you a few extra seconds in your mind’s safe haven.
The Chaplain is tight lipped. Professional. He returns the handshake firmly. 
“Pleasure is mine.” 
Ezra shifts slightly on his feet. Straightening his spine and dropping his shoulders. Your eyes bounce between the Chaplain and your fiancé.
“I must say, Father. You are even more handsome up close. I speak for the men in this country, thank you for taking the vow of celibacy!” The words spill out of the Duke. Unknowingly thinning the air. 
The Priest chuckles quietly, dropping his eyes briefly before landing them on you. And it feels like you could double over.  Your core temperature skyrockets under his smoldering gaze. 
He, the archer. You, the bullseye. 
“Let’s get started, shall we?” 
Ezra laces his fingers in yours, taking the two seats directly in front of the oak desk. A leather bound notebook and pheasant feather pen are neatly arranged — with your names on the first page.
Blue flame rises from your toes to hairline. You might as well have been sitting naked. With how exposed, how vulnerable you feel already.
“What will we be covering first, Father? Something about how wives should obey their husbands, right?” Ezra is light-hearted. Meant to be said in jest.
But he finds himself being the only party in the room laughing. 
The Priest rolls the ink pen between his fingers. Allowing a deafening silence to coat the walls. His expression is neutral, but eyes ablaze. 
“If the man in question is worthy of submission.” He starts. A low, ominous rumble. 
“Uh, yes. Of course.” Ezra responds, shifting in his seat. 
But the Chaplain does not stop. Intent on making a point, he leans in. Pen whirling lightning fast between his long, deft fingers. Enough tailwind to launch across the room, if he desired.  
“If the man in question would give his life for his wife.” Volcanic eyes linger on you, then back to your fiancé. Ezra’s palm finds your thigh. You gnaw on your inner cheek to avoid flinching away. 
“If he would love her like Christ loves all of his creations unconditionally. Unselfishly. Irrationally.” 
“Yes, Father. I understand.” 
“Only then, should she submit.” His serrated tone could split chromium with ease. 
“Of course, of course.” Ezra wisely accepts defeat. 
He presses a short kiss on your cheek as an apology that you didn’t ask for, nor do you want. 
“Mmm.” A forced acknowledgment of the Duke’s affection through your pinched lips. Barely able to move under the Father’s microscopic gaze. 
“Now then,” Father Geto clears the boulders in his throat. 
“Tell me about your love.” 
The question stuns both you and the Duke. Looking to each other sheepishly because neither of you chose this.
War is young men dying and old men talking. And your life path is no different. Dictated by conversations between the powers that be. 
“We’ve only met a week ago, Father.” Your honesty drives both of his eyebrows upward. 
“A week ago?”
“But we are hoping you can teach us.” The Duke, overeager and excitable. 
“Teach you…?” Father Geto muses. You can’t quite interpret his tone, or minimal response. But your heart flutters all the same. 
He is thinking something. And what you would give to get a glance. To be let in. 
“Perhaps guide us?” Ezra gives an unintentionally painful squeeze on your thigh. You fail to muffle the tiny whimper. 
The Priest’s eyes laser down to where your fiancé’s hand lays. Chest rising and falling dangerously slow. 
“Right.”
Your eyes trail upwards as he stands. Closer to God than to you from this point of view.
“Duke, Duchess. You’ll have to accept my sincerest apologies.” 
His fingers dip the unused pen back into the ink cup. The edges of his leather bound notebook coming together. Seemingly without any notes, but an entire script from this session swirling in his mind. 
“My schedule is incorrect. I have another commitment. We will reschedule, yes?” Said with a finality that sends chills crawling down your spine. 
The two of you stand. Another handshake between the men. A restrained nod for you.
Just as quickly as you were let in, Father Geto shuts you out of his office and his mind. 
     · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · 
Suguru presses his forehead against the shower tile. Warm water raining down his loose mane. Soothing his sore, overworked limbs. 
Today was maddening. 
He nearly destroyed his vestment the minute that God-forsaken counseling session ended. Seeking refuge, he took to the coast. 
And the sea provided anything but peace. 
She was angry with him, tonight. 
Curt. With unpredictable currents. Rip tides at nearly every turn. She tested his adaptation without mercy.
Just like that night.
“I’m going to stay on board, brother!”
Suguru flickered over to the silver-haired deckhand. An unfamiliar reservation opacifying his nearly translucent, iridescent eyes. 
Brother in name, technically. 
Their bloodlines were oil and water. He was a high born. Suguru was born unworthy of a beggar’s pity. 
But, bloodlines were inconsequential when their souls were instep as one. Both handed to humanity on the same night. During a thunderstorm already inscribed in history books.
‘The Tide of Eternal Requiem.’ 
It brought complete devastation. Crops destroyed. Families torn apart by tragic accidents inland and at sea. 
Then fate struck. 
Within the same hour, a voltaic boy, with a halo that put the clouds to shame and diamond eyes that could draw truth from murderers was born into the loving embrace of his parents. 
And Suguru was born with a crown so dark that the raging midnight appeared bright. 
With eyes as ominous as the sky above. 
Gunmetal grey, accented by an eerie violet swarm. Dormant volcanoes, threatening eruption. His birth mother abandoned him in an alley. Driven by fear that he was a bad omen from the Gods. 
“Ahhh, Satoru come on. Since when do you shy away from a few waves?”
Suguru teased. Already well into the process of shedding his work gear. 
“Zeus is the one rumored to be my father.” His counterpart flashed a knowing smile. 
“Poseidon doesn’t watch over me like he does you, Suguru.”
A tsunami couldn’t keep Suguru from his home. Much less a little rain. 
They were 3 miles away from the shoreline. Using his God-given ability, Suguru regularly acted as their scout. Performing his own reconnaissance then alerting the incoming ship of safe or turbulent terrain. 
“Almost ready to go, son?” 
His chosen father came up behind him. Suguru knew there were tears lining his meek eyes before turning to face him. 
“Dad.” Suguru sighed, fully disrobed now. Just his muscular frame and a compression suit. 
He met his father’s concerned gaze. Always like this during sea storms. Quiet prayers written all over his gentle features. 
Despite the worry, he never once attempted to convince his oceanic boy to stay on board. It would have been too cruel.
“I’ll be fine, I’ve traversed angrier swells.”
“Suguru, take care of yourself when I’m gone.” 
Elder, worn hands landed on his shoulders. Nearly too high for his reach. Suguru cocked his head to the side. 
This goodbye was different. 
“Stay on this path. For me. Albeit straight and narrow, there is a wonderful view. This is all for you, son.” 
Both men glanced to the Persian gulf. She thrashed against their vessel. Swaying their catch left and right with the intention of taking her creatures back. 
“Where is this coming from?” A genuine question from his younger self. Unable to read between the lines. 
“Can’t a man just speak from the heart?”
The melancholy smile didn’t meet the wrinkles of time decorating his eyes, but they shared a laugh anyway.  Suguru turned away but was promptly drawn back. 
“My beautiful boy.” 
The fisherman cradled his son’s face. Swimming in the eyes that Suguru once hated. The eyes that convinced his birth mother to abandon him. 
“Make it to shore, son.” Suguru rested his head against his father’s neck. Taking a slow, sweet drag of his scent.
Oak. 
He always smelled like oak. It was one of Suguru’s favorite things about him.
“If Poseidon calls—“
“I’ll tell him to fuck off.” Mischievous grin plastered on Suguru’s face. His father planted a kiss on his cheek, pushing him towards the end of the boat. As he always did.
Then the Gulf wrapped him in her hostile embrace. 
She was irate. 
Vicious tidal waves. Rapidly shifting currents. Even her creatures knew to settle below their usual depth. Suguru cursed the fact that he was born with useless, human lungs. Unable to withstand the pressure of the Midnight Zone. 
Within minutes his long, lean frame was riding her whims without a shred of control. Tossed around like a rag doll. At her complete mercy — or lack thereof. 
This was the first time he struggled to tame his element. A muffled groan bubbled around him. Serrated edges of long coral stalks dug into his back. Stark white foam whirled around him. 
Aerated waters. 
Suguru could barely maneuver against the waves pummeling his core. Searing heat traveling up his spine. His lungs demanded oxygen. 
The boat. 
The boat would never make it to shore. 
Desperate, furious strokes of his arms meant nothing against her unrelenting grasp. Effectively pinning Suguru to his underwater cross. 
A piece of chewed plank wood whizzed by his face. 
Followed by another. 
Then another. 
And Suguru watched his nightmare materialize before his eyes. Mustering his last oxygen reserve, he bellowed against his closed lips.
As if she hadn’t already ignored the cries of his fellow fisherman. 
Even still, he screamed so loud his ribcage should have vaporized. But ushering him to a watery grave at that time would have been too merciful. 
Suguru blinks out of the harrowing memory. The steeping tea takes at least two layers of epithelium off his esophagus.
Fucking, hell. 
He can’t seem to escape pain today.
The swim was excruciating.
Mass was dreadful.
Watching that boy’s hand lay on your lap was grating. 
Suguru’s mind drifts back to you. Your thought washes over him like baptizing waters purifying that which is impure.
The gleam in your eyes when you asked about his morning plunge. Barely a week and your pulse on him is already this precise.
Do not covet, Suguru. 
He scoffs to himself. Shaking free of your tempting spiral. 
This ‘straight and narrow’ path is proving to be more challenging than he let on. 
“Would you be proud, Father?” 
A whisper of accusation at the end of his inquiry. Suguru would give his arms, his eyes…his life to hear his father’s voice on the other end of his questions, once again. 
“Did He tell you?” 
Roaring silence. Of course. He knows that. He expects it. 
But it angers him all the same. 
“Did He come to you in a dream??” Suguru echos louder. More frantic. Punched out in a way he can barely recognize. 
“Was the reaper at His left, my heart on the right?!” A weak sob slips through the crack in his baritone. 
Yet another pain. But this one is tart and blurring his vision. 
“Did you KNOW? D—did you know that day was your last?!” He hisses through a salty stream.  Storming out to the garden to escape the walls collapsing in on him. 
Suguru’s eyes laser to the remaining thorny vines along his bed of hydrangeas. Without a second thought he wraps them around his bare arms. Staining the plant and his freshly bathed skin with crystalline tears. Once its thorns sufficiently bury into his skin he rips it away from the soil with all his might. 
“Bastard. I’m your SON.”
Warm metallic drips down the hills and ridges of his arms. Collecting in the flower bed. 
Is he cursing his earthly father? 
His Heavenly One? 
Or the Deity that brought this grief on him in the first place?
It hurts. 
An unforgiving pain. 
Much like the thorns in those rapids. Much like the inconceivable burn from his lungs begging for expanse. The time limit, even for him, ran lethally low. 
Well exceeding his father’s time limit. 
Poseidon stole from him that day.  
A callous trade for Suguru’s continued existence. 
“Why didn’t you…I—I should’ve been there.” 
Guilt eviscerates Suguru’s remaining resolve. Tilting his head up, he lets the salty crystals rain down his cheeks freely. 
The full moon cradles his face with the same warmth, the same adoration his father’s hands used to. 
Suguru accepts its celestial kisses for a moment before burying his face into his bloodied palms. His damp locks curtain his flushed face. Protecting the world from his unruly sobs.
“I’m here.” Barely audible words escape through desperate grabs for air. 
“I made it to shore, Dad.”
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E/N: Oh hello, don’t mind me just sobbing. Also, guest appearance by our glorious Blue Eyed Babygirl King™️ If you need me, I will be in witness protection before Gege finds this since it’s a crime to be a S*toru lover. 
taglist: @blkkizzat @rotteneyess
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daddydomjayjay99 · 4 months ago
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ATTENTION SISSY DIAPER FAGGOTS
If you can meet these simple criteria! Message me and we’ll see if we can’t destroy your masculinity too! Understand however this is a commitment! Im not interested in babies who use me to talk dirty too, get their rocks off and ghost! If im dominating you this is a commitment to produce what daddy demands. Im looking for a plaything that wants to be humiliated, regress, demoralised, pushed to do uncomfortable things and who can commit and follow my orders over a long period of time. Approach me diaper faggots, submit and i’ll make your sissy baby girl dreams come true!
Criteria-
1. Firstly I’m sorry but I’ve simply got no attraction too babies who are overweight, I get far more enjoyment out of skinny or slightly curvy faggots being feminised. However that said if you are slightly larger and agree to go on a strict workout and diet plan to make your body more effeminate then we can work with that.
2. You live alone! Its not a dealbreaker if you don’t but I prefer it because i will as a minimum want you caged and diapered when in your own home. The aim is that as a minimum i will operate a doorstep setup where in you will as an absolute minimum be MY sissy diaper fag while in your home and when you leave to go to work or other commitments then you may be a “man” again.
3. THERE ARE NO TRIBUTE FEES OR DEMANDS OF PAYMENT TO ME!!!! With that said, I don’t want payed by you but what i will do is ask you to buy or save up to by sissy baby faggot items or clothing which i want to see you in. In the event your a good faggot and do as your told then Daddy is not apposed to buying you little treats.
4. You understand that daily communication with Daddy is non negotiable, you must always see too it when Daddy messages you answer within 12 hours. You will not ghost or go on communication blackouts of any kind.
5. You understand that Daddy’s word on anything is right, is law, you will endeavour to do everything exactly how daddy says and you’ll consider daddy’s opinion when making any big decisions yourself.
6. Now this one seems odd but please, only cisgender males approach. I have nothing against transgirl sissies i just personally dont feel comfortable degrading or humiliating them about being failures as men and giving the usually sissy humiliation tasks to someone who’s genuinely not comfortable in their own skin and is changing gender. Its less of a you thing and more of a me thing on that one.
What will be expected of you:
1. You will at an absolute bare minimum be expected to wear chastity 24/7 and diapers at any time when you are not at work.
2. You will present as a juvenile, girly, effeminate, dress wearing, diaper using, juvenile activity doing sissy from the moment you enter your home till the moment you leave.
3. Over time i will force you to take on more effeminate characteristics to further destroy your masculinity such as growing out your hair, getting ear piercings, growing your nails, shaving ALL body hair from the nose down, painting your nails, perhaps dyeing your hair. Should you be committed enough you will eventually be forced to use a breast enlargement pump and perhaps even oestrogen.
4. You will fill your closet with sissy and sissy baby clothing of which i approve and over time will throw out male clothing you wear at home.
5. You will be given task which require time to be taken daily to learn new skills which are vital too a sissy like you such as makeup tutorials and hair styling tutorials.
6. You will also accept that you will be unpotty training yourself at night so that you are diaper dependent at bed time. I want you to wake every morning to the humiliating feeling of a full diaper.
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malfoyscoffee · 7 months ago
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cruel summer ౨ৎ theodore nott
pairing theodore nott x fem!reader genre fluff, slightest angst | 2.4k words | best friends to lovers warnings mentions of alcohol consumption, crying, and au with no voldemort. song "cruel summer" — lover, taylor swift
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It was the best summer you could have asked for.
All your friends had decided to spend your last summer before graduation at one of your estates; one located in a small yet beautiful muggle town where no one knew of your identities.
Your big and empty villa helped everyone have their own space. Yet you had spent every waking moment making more fun memories and getting close to your friends, especially Theodore.
Even yesterday, the two of you went out to the nearby beach and returned drenched from the ocean water and rain combined, forgetting to bring spare clothes to the spontaneous trip. Your friends didn’t bat an eye when the two of you returned like wet dogs, knowing it was normal for you two to go on your own adventures.
Today marked the final three days before summer ended before you had to return to Hogwarts for your seventh year.
The sun was starting to set, painting the sky with pastel colors, and a gentle breeze carried the scent of ash from the bonfire that Mattheo and Blaise had started. Your group had recently learned of a muggle snack called Smores, so everyone found a spot around the fire, trying to make the treat for the first time.
“We should all go out to the town bar later tonight since it’s better to be hungover tomorrow than the last day,” Draco suggested, leaning back in his seat as you took a bite out of the dessert. You leaned over to Theodore, who shared the spacious seat with you, letting him take a bite too.
"That’s a brilliant idea, it's our last night to drink before we start the semester,” Mattheo agreed, nodding along with what most of the group was thinking.
Theodore shifted next to you, leaning down on your shoulder while speaking up, “I’m feeling a bit under the weather, so go without me.”
You looked at your best friend closely, not realizing sooner that he had felt sick today.
"Did you catch a cold from yesterday?” Pansy inquired, reaching over to one of the plates to grab some graham crackers. There were many plates sprawled out over the side tables filled with crackers, marshmallows, and chocolate bars.
You felt Theodore nod next to you, "Yeah, I think it’s from the rain yesterday, I’ll be fine though. You guys go without me,” Theodore reassured, popping a marshmallow into his mouth.
“I’ll come to pick you up if you want to head back early from the bar later,” He spoke with his mouth full, making you laugh as you could barely make out his sentence.
After he finished eating the marshmallow, he placed his arm around your waist, pulling you closer. “Thanks, Theo,” You said before taking the last bite of your Smore.
He smiled brightly at you before the group soon fell into different topics. 
You eventually got up from your seat, walking over to the girls to listen to the latest gossip that Pansy heard through the grapevine.
However, a conversation caught the attention of everyone.
“You're going to go abroad?” Lorenzo's eyes widened at Theodore's announcement, causing a hush to fall over the group.
You turned straight to where you were previously sitting. Blaise was the next to speak, “Mate, when was this decided?” Everyone waited for Theodore’s response while your nervousness suddenly kicked in.
Sure, none of you verbally discussed your future after Hogwarts, but it was a silent agreement assumption that all your friends would settle down nearby.
“I’m planning on going to the States for a while, nothing is set yet though.”
Your heart sank as you watched Theodore's gaze meet yours, his expression a mixture of regret and apprehension.
"When were you going to tell us?” You questioned, still shocked by this announcement.
He looked down at his hands, feeling ashamed for keeping this from everyone, especially you.
“i just didn’t know when to bring it up, so thanks Enz,” Theodore glared at Lorenzo, “For dropping the bomb like this.” He spoke sarcastically at the boy who sighed.
Astoria tried to lighten the mood, noticing the frown on your lips, “Draco, aren’t you going to London after we graduate?”
The conversation shifted to Draco’s plans to study in university longer to become a healer before the group shifted to another topic.
You couldn’t focus after hearing about Theodore’s future plans being abroad, meaning it would get hard to see him.
But why were you worried when he was just your best friend?
“Hey, can you both go inside and help me get more ingredients?” Pansy asked you and Astoria loudly, the two of you agreed to go inside for a moment.
“So, are you going to tell Theo?” Astoria looked at you, curiosity playing in her eyes. She walked over to the shopping bags on the kitchen island to grab more chocolate bars.
“Tell Theo what?” You stare at her with confusion, walking over to your pantry to grab the marshmallow bags. Pansy sighed, setting out more plates for the ingredients on the counter.
“Are you going to tell Theo that you like him?” You froze your actions for a second, standing in the middle of the kitchen with the marshmallow bag in your arms.
“What do you mean? We're just best friends.” You wave them off and open the bag.
Astoria slaps a hand to her forehead, “Yeah, but you fancied him for years! Also, the two of you have been hanging out every single day of our summer. What two best friends don’t get sick of each other and act like a couple?”
“Two blind idiots, that is.” Pansy finishes Astoria’s question, right as you finish pouring the marshmallows.
You sigh, “Okay, sure I fancy Theo. But you guys just heard that he’s leaving for the states after graduation. I won’t even see him, so it’s hopeless.”
You felt yourself getting more upset at the idea that Theodore didn’t tell you before, “Why did he hide that information though?”
Astoria walked around the kitchen island to comfort you, a hand resting on your back. "You know, it’s okay if you do end up confessing to Theo. We still have one year at school together,” Astoria comforted you.
Pansy picks up the plates you filled and sets it on the island, “Also, didn’t you hear when he said it’s not set yet? He might not go abroad, who knows?”
You turn around and grab the plates, walking towards the door to go back outside, “It's useless, he doesn’t like me back. Let's just forget this happened.”
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A few hours later, you sat in a booth at the town’s muggle bar with everyone except Theodore.
The muggle bar was bustling with activity, filled with the raucous sounds of drunken laughter and the rhythmic beat of music from the large speakers. Your group opted to sit in the big booth instead, the furthest away from the commotion. This was more fun as it was similar to what you did at parties back at Hogwarts.
In front of you laid three empty pitchers, once full of dirty shirleys, the alcohol gone in two hours due to your rushed drinking.
“Can someone drink the rest of my vodka cran?” Astoria asked, leaning into Blaise’s shoulder. Everyone chuckled at her behavior, knowing Astoria was always the first one to get tired while drinking.
Blaise pushed her cup towards Mattheo, who gladly accepted the drink for himself. Most of your friends had a high alcohol tolerance, so it was expected to drink for hours.
“It’s okay, you can close your eyes for a bit,” Blaise spoke while looking down at Astoria with adoring eyes. The entire group saw the interaction, feeling bittersweet about the affectionate couple in your friend group.
“Salazar, if only I had a boyfriend who would watch me while I'm out drinking,” You spoke while grabbing Astoria’s—now Mattheo’s, drink and chugging it down.
Everyone was taken aback by your action because this was not how you usually acted during the many years of drinking with you. 
“You do have someone who takes care of you every time you drink.” Draco reminds you while pushing the vodka cranberry away from you.
You stare at Draco with wide eyes, “No, Dray, Theo only sees me as a friend.” You let out a dramatic sigh and your friends laugh at your obvious crush, which only Theodore hasn’t picked up on yet.
Draco puts his hands up in surrender, but with his signature smirk, “I didn’t even have to say his name for you to talk about him, huh?”
“Theodore Nott, my best friend, does not like me.” You groan while putting your hands on your eyes and leaning back in the comfortable seat.
Tears welled up in your eyes, catching everyone off guard as your emotions spilled over. “Guys, Thor’s going to leave for the States. How will I see him when he’s abroad for Merlin knows how long?”
Pansy started to pass your napkins to wipe away your tears, while Lorenzo took out his phone. “I’m going to text Theo to pick her up.”
Pansy nodded at Lorenzo before looking at you in pity, “Yeah, she’s going to be out soon.”
Everyone kept their gaze on you as your tears eventually stopped falling. “Rest your head and sleep a little.” Mattheo spoke while moving your head to his shoulder while you closed your eyes.
Seeing your eyes closed, Draco twirled the black straw in his cup, “So when do you guys think they’re going to get together?”
Pansy chuckled at the comment, taking out her phone to snap a few photos of you for memory's sake. “First week after we get back to school, I’ll bet on it.”
"I say in one day,” Mattheo chimed in with a grin, resuming the conversation while you rested.
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"Theodore!” You exclaim while running to your best friend. You pull him into a hug while breaking into a big smile, Theodore laughing at your drunk state.
Theodore waves behind you to say goodbye to Mattheo and Pansy, who walked you outside the building. Everyone else planned to stay longer at the bar.
The fresh cold breeze greeted you as you stepped outside, causing you to shiver lightly for not dressing for the weather.
Theodore quickly draped his hoodie over your head, the fabric offering warmth against the chilly evening air.
The cold breeze nipped at your skin, causing goosebumps to form as you wrapped Theodore’s hoodie tighter around yourself.
Theodore quickly found your hand and intertwined it, a smile reaching both of your faces. The two of you walked back to the villa in comfortable silence.
It was a short walk back and when you arrived, you excitedly pulled Theodore to your spot.
You had told Theodore about the garden kept away in the gates in the back of your villa, hanging out many times during your stay. You decided to keep the garden a secret, wanting it to be your little hideout.
“Did you have a fun time?” Theodore asks first, walking towards the white bench placed in the garden.
You shake your head, staring at your connected hands,“No, Blaise and Astoria were being so cute it made me sad.”
Theodore frowned, pulling you to sit down next to him. Your connected hands were placed on his lap.
“It’s okay, you can tell me anything” Theodore reassured, unsure if you would open up to him while being drunk. He knew the walk back would sober you up a bit, but not completely.
“It’s just,” You stopped to think about your next words while Theodore waited for you to continue.
“Never mind, I’m fine.”
“But that’s not true.”
Theodore’s gaze bore into your own, not making any effort to move. The moonlight cast a soft glow over Theodore's features, illuminating his face as he looked at you with a mixture of concern and affection.
"Let’s just go inside,” You suggest, standing up from the bench and pulling his hand.
“Did you cry?” Theodore asks, being able to see your face more clearly after you’ve stood up.
Theodore rose and cupped a hand on your face, tracing over your cheeks. “Why did you cry?”
You place a hand over his hand, moving it away from his face. “This,” You break free from his hold completely and take a step to create space away from him, “Theo, this is why I cried. You’re the reason that I cried.”
Theodore stares at you without saying anything, making you more frustrated.
“Theo, I love you, isn’t that the worst thing you’ve ever heard?” You yell your confession, finally voicing the feelings you’ve kept from him. Your heart raced as you finally voiced the feelings you had kept hidden for so long, the weight of your confession hanging in the air.
Theodore had a devious grin on his face, his laughter echoing in the quiet garden as he pulled you into a reassuring hug. “That’s the best thing I’ve heard in my life.”
You stand there shocked at his actions, “No,” You mumble into his shoulder. “No, this can’t be happening.”
You pull away from his hug, “Theo, you’re going abroad after graduation, I won’t even see you. Salazar, how is this even going to happen? No, how are we going to happen? Wait, do you even like me?”
As Theodore pressed a tender kiss to your forehead, you felt a surge of warmth flood through you, dispelling the lingering doubts and fears. “You really can’t see that I’ve loved you since first year?”
Your mouth is open from shock, and Theodore laughs once again, this time wiping the tears away.
“This can work. I’ll be gone for a few months but I’ll come back, here, to be with you.”
You look at Theodore, a smile now forming, “So we can do this? Give this relationship a try?”
“Yes, now let’s walk inside, you’re going to catch a cold.”
You give Theodore a quick peck on his cheek, before taking his hand again.
“You know,” Theodore pulls your intertwined hands to kiss your hand, leading you to exit the garden.
You blush at his action, “What?” You ask curiously.
“It’s a cruel summer with you.”
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And you can guess that Mattheo won that bet.
315 notes · View notes
nickeverdeen · 10 months ago
Note
Zuko reacting to reader trying on makeup for the first time- (re sending this request lol)
In advance I apologize if I’ll get something wrong, I don’t really understand make-up and how it’s used
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Hcs Zuko x reader who’s trying make-up on for the first time
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Zuko would initially be confused and intrigued as he watches you carefully apply different makeup products for the first time
He might express concern if he thinks the makeup is a form of hiding or masking yourself
But once you reassure him, he’ll become more supportive
He might try to help you a few times, but soon gives up
He knows he’d probably screw it up
Zuko may not fully understand the purpose of each makeup item
Which would lead to amusing moments of him asking questions like:
“Why are you putting color on your eyelids?”
As you finish, Zuko genuinely compliments your appearance but may struggle to articulate it, simply saying:
“You look… nice.”
He’s trying his best, though
Make-up isn’t something he is fimiliar with
Despite his stoic exterior, Zuko would secretly appreciate the effort you put into it
If you ask him for feedback, he might nervously respond, “I think you looked beautiful without it anyway, but I like this too.”
Over time, Zuko might become more accustomed to your makeup routine and even surprise you with compliments or small gestures related to it
He would definetly ask Katara for help to understand it a bit better and how he could help you with it
Zuko unintentionally shows his curiosity by observing your makeup routine more closely, trying to understand the nuances of each product
Zuko may surprise you by remembering the names of some makeup items or asking thoughtful questions about your preferences, demonstrating his effort to understand
That would be Katara’s work halfly too as she would teach him what product does what and what it’s called
Over time, he could become more comfortable and might even offer to help you remove your makeup
And that could turn it into a shared, intimate moment between you two
Zuko’s stoic demeanor might soften as he realizes that makeup is a form of self-expression for you
Eventually, he might become your biggest supporter, whether you choose to wear makeup or not
As you apply makeup, Zuko may unintentionally furrow his brows, attempting to understand the transformative process happening before him
There could be a humorous moment where Zuko mistakes a makeup product for something else, leading to a light-hearted exchange as you correct him
He may cautiously touch the finished makeup, wanting to understand the texture and perhaps comparing it to face paint used in Fire Nation traditions
Overall, Zuko’s initial reaction to you trying on makeup for the first time might be a mix of confusion, curiosity, and subtle support
As he observes and learns about the different products and techniques, his perspective evolves, and he begins to appreciate the artistry and self-expression behind makeup
Over time, Zuko becomes more engaged and respectful, recognizing the significance of this aspect of your personal style and embracing it as part of your unique identity
296 notes · View notes
hoaxriot · 18 days ago
Text
SEVEN DEVILS
pairings. regulus black x fem!reader
summary. you had one task and so did he but neither of you could finish it.
warnings. mention of death, murder, torture, abuse. smut.
notes. this is not a magic story, death eaters are the same but without wands and magic. it’s a long one and I’m very proud of this😭. there’s not an exact timeline on when this takes place bc tbh idk. reader and regulus are not the best people!!!!!!!! pls remember this is fiction. i feel like i kinda lost the plot at the end?? 😭
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Kill regulus black. Kill him. Get him alone and kill him.
Those words rung through your head as your stared at him from across the room, holding onto a glass of champagne. It was the blacks annual big party and you had found your way into receiving an invitation, after many tries — this was your only chance.
Regulus Black was a death eater, he was who you hated. You didn’t care why he chose to be it, he was and you were sent to kill him. Looking down at your glass before bringing it to your lips to finish the drink, setting it down on the table next to you.
You had done this before but now you’re heart was beating and your hands were sweating as you stared at the man. You felt eyes on you causing you to turn you head, Sirius Black was looking at you. Licking your lips as you turned your head to look at a painting on the wall.
Jesus, there was no way you could do this tonight. Sirius could act like he didn’t care much for his brother, he watched everyone that came close to him. Regulus also always had two friends by his side that you’ve learned to be Barty Crouch jr. and Evan Rosier. You were not killing him tonight.
You sighed knowing the consequences, walking through the crowd to the front door. You felt someone grab your wrist, tugging it away as you turned around to see regulus black standing in front of you.
You name fell from his pink lips softly, you furrowed your eyebrows as to how he know your name.
“Black.” you replied dryly with a smile.
His lips turned upwards, “leaving so soon? the food hasn’t come out yet.” Regulus spoke gesturing towards the tables scattered across the room.
You looked around, Evan Rosier stared at you. Putting on your best smile as you wiped your hands on your black lady dress. W as you smiled, without a word you walked away.
A man wearing an all black suit opened the large doors for you, sighing as the cool air hit your face walking towards the car across the street.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” the man next to you immediately yelled slamming on the seat in front of him as the driver drove away.
Flinching at the loud noise, “I’m sorry, sir. he has a lot of eyes on him.” Your explanation meant nothing to him as he slapped you.
“You never fail to disappoint me.” He spat making you shrink into the seat. For the rest of the drive home, he continued to jab at you, you stayed quiet knowing not to upset him.
He had took you into his home after your parents were killed by death eaters, he taught you everything you know. Kill them and you’ll eventually get the revenge on the right person— in your mind it was right because of how much he said it, it drilled into your head.
The next day, you lived a normal life working at a bakery with a guard across the street watching you. If you were sent to kill someone, you were obviously on someone’s list too.
“Hey, someone’s at the counter.” Savannah, your coworker said as you sat in the small office.
Turning around in the chair, “why can’t you take them?” you said annoyed, you were on your break, “I have to clean the bathroom— unless you want too.”
“No.” you spoke standing up, walking past her and behind the counter.
Regulus stood in front of it with his two goons behind him, “My friends told me about this place, said it was quite good. i’ll take the best thing on the menu.” He voice remained monotone, you wondered if he ever sound excited about anything.
“Of course.” you smiled, what the fuck was he doing here?
“Here.” you said handing him the bag as he handed you the money.
“Hope you enjoy, have a good day.” Speaking sweetly, but deep down you were scared he knew you were sent to kill him.
Regulus stayed as his friends walked away, “may i help you with anything else?”
“Dinner at seven.”
The hell did he just say?
“Sorry?” you heard him but you were way beyond confused.
“Let me take you to dinner, tonight at seven.” Repeating himself, you were about to shut him down and say no before you remembered your assignment.
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Yeah. Where?” You asked putting on your best smile even though you were terrified. Of course you knew who Regulus Black was but never once has he even batted an eye at you.
He chuckled, “write down your address and i’ll pick you up.” you nodded writing it down on your notepad before ripping it off and handed it to him.
“Thank you, I’ll see you at seven.” he winked as he walked away.
After work you went home to get ready realizing you had no idea what to wear, deciding to wear a simple dress.
You got ready and waited for almost an hour, maybe you got ready too early. Looking at your clock reading 7:45.
Sighing as you opened your balcony door, grabbing the cigarettes on the small table and lighting one. You watched the streets hoping for him to show, you groaned to yourself realizing you were waiting for him, not waiting to kill him.
A black car pulled in front of your home, regulus came out from it. You took one last hit from your cigarette before putting it out, walking back into your house and spraying perfume on as he knocked on your door. Running your hands on your dress to smooth it out, opening the door to see him dressed so nice compared to you but that’s just how he dressed all the time, dressed like he was going to a formal.
“You look beautiful.” He spoke as he looked you up and down.
Smiling tightly, “you’re late.” he laughed under his breath.
“I got lost. you live in a weird place.” he smiled, holding his arm out for you to take. You stared at it for a few seconds before intertwining your arm with his as you shut your door.
The walk to the car was quiet, the car ride was quiet you got antsy. Regulus noticed placing his hand on top of yours, you looked at him, he smiled at you. Regulus Black actually smiled at you— you almost forgot you were meant to kill him tonight. An awkward smile came to your face as as you turned to look at the window.
The car came to a stop, regulus stepped out and walked around the car to open your door. again, he put his arm for you to take it. “I’ll be around the block, Mr.Black.” The driver said before he pulled off.
The two of you walked into the restaurant, straight to the back into a secluded corner. The place was nice, too nice for you that you felt out of place. Regulus pulled the chair out for you, once he did he sat down in front of you.
Regulus started conversation, it went smoother than you thought it would. The two of you laughed throughout the dinner, even as the food was brought.
“You interest me.” He said, your name spilling from his lips.
You laughed lightly taking a sip from you glass, “why’s that, Black?” you questioned with a smile.
Regulus shrugged, “I feel like you have a lot behind your name. Your story. No one knows about it.” He spoke softly but questionably like he quite didn’t know what he was saying.
“They don’t,” you said with a smile. “Only—“ you said before clearing your throat cutting yourself off.
Regulus furrowed his eyebrows leaning back into his seat, “only?” he said with a questioning tone. His eyebrows raised quickly.
“Nobody. i don’t have anybody to know my story.” You said looking down at the table, only one person did but if you said that name regulus would probably take the knife sitting in front of him and put it in your chest.
“Hm. why?” Regulus asked leaning forward, he seemed genuine. you looked at him, his eyes showed interest.
You signed downing the rest of your wine, “i only had my parents, never had any friends. they died two years ago in a car accident,” death eaters tortured your mom as your dad was forced to watch, tortured her until she could no longer take it, then simply killing your dad but watching your mother go through that had already killed him. “Then my uncle took me in.” Liam Williams took you in, his daughter was killed by death eaters so he had found people who went through the same thing and found revenge.
You cleared your throat, “I’m sorry,” you laughed. “That was deep.” You spoke with a tight smile.
“No it’s okay. I’m very sorry for your loss, i couldn’t imagine.” he wouldn’t give a shit if his parents died, he would be free.
Regulus stood up, instead of his arm he put his hand out. “don’t you have to pay?” You asked causing him to chuckle.
“My dad knows the owner, they don’t like us to pay.” He explained, you felt bad not paying but took his hand. the car was waiting for you two outside the place.
After getting into the car, you realized you enjoyed regulus blacks company, he made you feel heard. “I kind of don’t want the night to end.” You said softly, you wanted him to hear you but at the same time you didn’t.
Regulus turned to you as you stared at the seat in front of you, “me either,” you made him feel wanted, he hadn’t felt that in so long. “Why don’t you come back to my place?” he suggested.
“I’m not sleeping with you.” You stated making him laugh. “Just to hang out, but you also never know.” He said, turning your head to look at him, he had a teasing look on his face making you laugh, agreeing to come home with him.
The car pulled into his long driveway, you knew the blacks were rich but hell, his house was huge. Regulus’ hand held onto yours as you walked to his front door.
As soon as the door shut, he shoved you against the door and his lips were on yours. You froze until his hands squeezed your hips, your hands came to his neck pulling him closer to you as you finally kissed back ignoring everything you said ten minutes before. One of his hands came to hold yours face.
Regulus pulled away, “jump.” He breathed out against your lips. You did as he said, wrapping your legs around his waist as he held onto you. Regulus walked through his house, you put your head into his neck kissing it, feeling him harden and his quiet groans in your ear.
Once he made it to his room, he set you down and immediately started kissing you again. You opened your lips as his tounge explored you, you began to undress him of his coat throwing it onto the floor. One of his hands drew the straps of your dress down, not wearing a bra your boobs fell out once he continued to slide the dress down. Regulus took his shirt off, guiding you to lie down.
He kneeled down kissing right above your underwear, whimpering as he made his way up taking one of your tits into his mouth.
“Reg..” you whispered grabbing a handful of his locks, “yeah,baby?” He said looking up with low eyes.
“I need you,” you said hungrily, Regulus hummed dragging his fingers from your chest. His fingers slide into your underwear, feeling your wetness he groaned. you squinted under his touch, his fingers rubbed circles on your clit.
You moaned feeling him slide his finger through your folds, “god, you’re so beautiful.” Regulus breathed out as he looked down watching his fingers pump in and out of you, he kissed your chest. He curled his fingers making your arch back as you pulled on his locks, Regulus tilted his back to watch you, your eyes closed with your mouth opened, filthy noises coming out of it as you breathed heavily.
You hadn’t had sex in almost a year, you were already closing feel the build in your stomach. He knew the way you clenched around his fingers and your fingers tightening on his hair.
“Cum for me, love.” He whispered kissing your neck, chest, and face, no doubt leaving marks. “Fuck, regulus.” Moaning loudly as his fingers worked fast, his thumb rubbing all the right places. The tension in your stomach snapped as your orgasm hit you, coming on his fingers.
Your chest fell up and down as he rode your orgasm out, you whimpered as he pulled his fingers out grabbing his face. You smashed your lips onto his, grabbing him. The kiss was messy and full of want. As he kissed you, you pulled your underwear down as he tried to work on his pants without breaking away from you.
He struggled making you laugh, he started to with you as he pulled away to stand up. He unbuckled his pants pulling them down with his boxers, you didn’t have time to be shocked at his size as he hovered over you. He lined up to you, the two of you stared at each other with heavy breaths.
“Regulus?” You questioned the look in his eyes, “We don’t have to do this.”
“What? No, I want this. I- I just haven’t done it in a long time.” He confessed, you smiled, “me either.” The two of you let out a breathy laugh.
You felt the tip of his cock brush against you making you gasp lightly, he began to slowly push himself into you making you both moan. He dropped his head into the crook of your neck, “Fuck.” He groaned out.
You held your breath getting used to his size, “You feel so good, Reg.” You whispered holding the side of his neck, he moaned at your words.
“I know, you feel so fucking good, so tight.” He groaned kissing and sucking on your neck. “Can I move?” He asked rubbing his thumb on your cheek.
“Please.” That all, he pulled out then pushed back in hard but slow making you moan out loudly. He kept the same rhythm, his hand that held your face slowly slid down to your neck testing the waters. Regulus watched you, you looked into his eyes as you moved his hand to where he was choking you with the right amount of pressure.
Regulus smirked as he adjusted himself, the new position made you moan. Regulus had been matching your noises and you loved it, it made you approach your orgasm quicker.
You clenched around him, “oh, fuck.” Regulus whimpered as he fell into your neck again.
“I’m close, fuck. Reg. Keep going, just like that.” You moaned out scratching his back with your nails.
“Yeah? Cum for me again, baby.” He spoke as his fingers found your clit again rubbing it, your nails dug into his skin making him groan.
The band in you snapped, your legs shook around him as his rhythm got messier. “Fucking hell,” your name fell from his lips like you were a goddess. “Ah, fuck.” You felt him twitch in you making you moan, “Reg, I’m gonna cum again. You’re so good.” Your words set him off, his moans and groans in your ear set you off.
After a few seconds, Regulus pulled out and he laid down besides you bringing the sheets to cover the both of you. The two of you laid there, fucked out and ended up falling asleep in each others arms.
You woke by the sun beaming into your eyes through his large windows, you hummed lightly. You felt arms snaked around your waist, looking down your eyes widened.
The god forbidden mark engraved into his skin, reminding you of everything bad that happened to you in your life. You felt ashamed that you had slept with him, but he treated you so well.
What the fuck was wrong with you?
You threw his arms off of you, not caring if it woke him up. Grabbing your dress to slip it on, you heard him whisper your name groggily rubbing his eyes as he sat up in his bed.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” You whispered looking around for your heels, seeing you so distressed made him confused.
Regulus stood up, putting his boxers on, “What’s wrong?” He questioned, taking a step forward as you took two back.
“You. You’re what’s wrong.” You pointed to his arm, he didn’t have to look to know. “Jesus,” you muttered slamming his door open and walking down his stairs.
Ignoring the calls of your name, you open his front door. “Oh my god, oh my god.” You pull out your phone, pressing on Liam’s contact.
“Liam. Pick me up, please.” You said into the phone through breaths once you realized he answered.
You heard a breath through the line, “Liam’s not gonna be able to do that, sweetheart.” A dark voice said making you gasp, stuttering over your words you heard a crunch behind you. Turning around, Regulus stood there.
“Bring her to my dad.” He said shakily, you shook your head as two people came beside you. “No!” You yelled as you elbowed one of them in the face, then punching the other one. You looked at Regulus before running, you didn’t make it past his mailbox before you ran into someone.
Orion Black stood in front of you, he smirked bring a cloth to your nose. The world faded away from you within seconds, you felt like you were meeting death.
You woke up groggily, you felt glued to the floor, the cold dirty floor. You swore you heard your name being said but still couldn’t come to open your eyes.
Kill her. Get her alone and kill her.
Those words rung through Regulus Blacks mind as he stared at your body that was covered in dirt and blood. His fist clenched against his sides, you were Regulus’ mission— you killed many death eaters alongside Liam Willams and many other. Yet, when he got to know you he couldn’t kill you. His mom slapped him and called him stupid
‘You’ve only known her for two days.’ She spat at in his face, now he watched you try to come to your senses.
“Black, step away from her.” Williams spoke from behind him, like he gave a shit. He looked over his shoulder to glare at the man.
“Regulus?” Your hoarse voice got him to look back, “please, I don’t wanna die.” You whispered, you were sore everywhere and couldn’t move.
Regulus tilted his head to the side, “yeah? But you wanted to kill me? You’ve killed a lot of people.” His words spat at you like venom, puncturing every part of you. Never once did you think this day would come.
“You people, sick people killed my parents. Killed innocent people.” Anger boiled in your body somehow giving you energy to sit up, now face to face with Regulus.
“What’s the difference between them killing your parents then you killing more than that. This sick man behind me, has manipulated you into thinking this is—“
A loud slam cut his sentence off, “Step away from her, Regulus.” His father said, he immediately straightened his back and stood by his father.
“Sweetheart, do you know the punishment for killing all those people?” Orion smiled mimicking his son’s actions before, leaning down to look at you. You felt small under his gaze.
He cocked his head to the side as you avoided his eye contact. “Hm? We make you feel the pain of every single person you killed, that’s a lot, right?” Orion smirked, “Y’know, I kinda wished we found you first. You’re a good one.” You felt like puking as the man spoke.
Next thing you know, three men and one woman walks into the room with smirks on their faces. You look to Liam for answers, he just stares back to you making you open your mouth in shock— he promised to protect you from this.
“These three are family members of who you’ve killed, so they’ll be here to enjoy the show— while also joining. “ Orion makes a noise, “but the star of the show— my dear son. Regulus. I’m so proud you, son. You’ve made me and your mom so proud. Tom will be thrilled to hear you caught her.” Orion grabbed Regulus face who flinched, you now realized this was some sick family shit.
Regulus turned to look at you over his shoulder, you had tears flowing down your stained cheeks. Tears prickled his own eyes, he finally found someone he felt like he could know and grow to even like. He also had never fucking killed someone, he just was handed simple missions.
“Please, no.” You begged, a woman with curly hair came to you, she grabbed your face making you whimper. “Shut up, girl. You will suffer the consequences of your actions!” She shouted in your face, you desperately tried to pull away from her face as her nails dug into your skin.
She finally pulled away, you breathed out in relief but quickly gasped again seeing Regulus stand behind her with something in his hand. “Only on one condition will I kill her, father.” He said staring into your eyes, you pleaded quietly.
“It’s just me, I’ll allow you but I don’t want them here.” He smiled at you causing you to furrow your eyebrows,
“Reg—“
“Father, I will not do it.”
Liam chuckled from the corner, “Shut up. You three out.” Regulus smirked, handing you the metal bar in his hand. You took it with the handcuffs around your wrists, your hands shaked.
‘Do it.’ He mouthed to you, shaking your head with tears. A sob escaped your lips, from behind Regulus it seemed normal.
“Fucking hell, just do it!” Liam yelled catching Orion’s attention, you squeezed your eyes shut slamming the bar against Regulus’ ankles, he groaned falling to the ground.
Orion looked at you, he had no weapon but you were locked to the wall. He walked towards you, as soon as he got in arms length you smashed the bar against his head, he fell to the ground with a loud groan. Regulus dug into his father’s pockets grabbing the keys, tossing them to you.
Your heart beat quickened as you struggled to put the key into the hole because your hands were so shaky. You gasped out once you heard the click and the freeing feeling around your wrists.
“Run.” Regulus spoke, you looked at him as he stared at his father, confused on what to do.
You crawled to him, “Regulus, please. We can go.” You whispered, “You don’t have to do this, we can live.”
“We won’t get out of here alive.” Those words made your stomach drop, “I’ve done the unthinkable, you are wanted by every death eater. Even if we do, we won’t be alive for long.” Regulus looked at you through his eyelashes, tears brimmed his eye-line, like he didn’t want them to fall.
“I’m tired of fighting this,” he whispered causing you lips to frown. “Everyday is a battle and in the end I know I won’t end so just go, I’ll give you time to run.” Regulus was doing a lot for you even after the two of you were sent to kill each other.
Suddenly, the door slammed open. Sirius Black and his friends stood in the frame. The older black brother pointed a knife at you, “Get the fuck away from my brother.”
You immediately fell back, he stormed towards you grabbing your shoulders pulling you up and pushing you up against the wall, feeling the knife against your throat making you gasp.
“Sirius—“
“You think you can get away? You tried to kill my brother.” You whimpered as he pushed the knife harder against your throat.
“I-i know, I’m sorry, sorry. I just- fuck, I’m sorry, okay? I’ll do anything, just please don’t kill me. I ha-haven’t lived! Oh my, I really don’t wanna die.” You begged, you knew you sounded stupid but you did not want to die.
Sirius looked at you questionably as you squeezed your eyes shut, he slowly let the knife fall from your neck, you let out a breath without realizing you held your breath the whole time.
You saw Liam move from the corner of your eye, you wanted to kill him. He hadn’t done one thing to protect you like he’d sworn, “C’mon, little one. Come get me out of these things.” He spoke catching everyone’s attention, you scoffed.
“Why the fuck would I do that?” You spat, Sirius cleared his throat.
“We don’t have time for this, we gotta leave.” He spoke, everyone nodded, Regulus didn’t. He continued to stare down at his father, you had taken away someone just like someone had done to you.
Sirius knelt down whispering to his brother, you stared at the other people. You probably looked insane, a dress that had ripped up, makeup messed up, and hair crazy. You also had bruises covering your body, blood smothered everywhere.
“Lets go—“
“Woah! What about me?!” Liam yelled, you stopped dropping the keys onto the floor— too far for him to reach as you followed the group out of the house, everyone stopped once they reached outside.
You shivered at the cool air, “Can I go home?” You said shakily causing everyone turn to you, some of them with hatred and some with pity.
“Yeah, just don’t let me catch you anywhere near us.” Sirius spoke, you nodded, he actually scared you. You looked at Regulus who was already staring at you, you smiled before you turned around and began walking.
Silent tears began to fall, there was a long road but you didn’t care. Everything was numb, you couldn’t fell the concrete on your bare feet. You wished Sirius had killed you or Regulus killed you the first time he’d saw you. There was nothing to live for anymore.
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luffyvace · 8 months ago
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HEYYYY!! how are you?? i hope you’re doing well ❤️❤️
i was wondering if you could do a headcanon/story where reader is like the daughter of Dracule Mihawk but like she(or gender neutral) never met her mom, so when she was growing up Boa Hancock was like their cool auntie that she learned how to be a woman (doing makeup,painting nails, finding her style ect.)
ONLY IF YOU ARE COMFORTABLE THO, BTW I LOVEE YOUR WRITING 💕💕
HIII IM DOING GOOD ANON!! You dear? :)
i do female reader dw!! I’ll be using she/her as well, for reference
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Awhh dadhawk <33
AUNTBOAAUNTBOAAUNTBOAAA!! She’d be the BEST most SPOILING wine aunt EVER🍷💄
Of course it’s alright honey! Alsooo TYSM!! I’m so glad you enjoy 😭💓💓
Being mihawk’s daughter has a lot of perks and literally no down slides. actually I half way take that back. The only down slide is that there’s a target on your head for those who are crazy enough to come for you. But that’s like a mere 00.1% and even then just because they come for you doesn’t mean they’ll get to you 🤡
especially since your the NUMBER ONE swordsman’s daughter.
Also this is really random but you probably meet zoro eventually, perona as well, they obviously stay with you for some time so perona and you likely get close. I imagine you would introduce her to boa and the three of you become a trio. You and Perona are her adorable nieces and boa is your doting, beautiful and totally awesome auntie :3
don’t get me wrong mihawk is a awesome father. He seems like a very responsible man and that he would not leave you out in the cold at the cost of his own life. He spoils you just as equally as boa does and although he’s not the most trusting man on earth, he wouldn’t dare break the bond you two have when he can’t replace it with your actual mother. At this point not that you wanted to.
Never meeting your mom may have taken a toll on your mental health at first, but not to worry! Awesome aunt boa to the rescue!!
The chances of you meeting boa we’re actually very slim, whether you know it or not. As I said Mihawk doesn’t easily trust plus you probably met at a warlord meeting where he has to take you along for one reason or another.
You saw boa and naturally, thought she was very pretty. Mihawk is rather reserved too so you probably don’t see people often in general (til you get older). Therefore, seeing such a ethereal woman made you instantly admire her. You immediately wanted to get to know her—and, luckily for you, she took an interest in the girl who’s mihawk’s daughter!
now idk what you did but she started the conversation, and whatever you replied made her think you weren’t so bad! You two chatted some more and after figuring out you had no mother figure she took it upon herself to raise a cute girl such as yourself to be a good woman. She didn’t exactly want to be viewed as your mother..that would relate her too closely to mihawk, a man, for her liking. So! She’ll be the cool and classy wine aunt instead! 🍷💋
you love your dad, he does his best to raise you as a single father and pirate/warlord/worlds best swordsman. And you truly do appreciate him! But when Boa bashes him for being a man her insults are low key so funny you can’t help but laugh 🗿 (hc that Boa would be good at roasting people on the spot :3)
boa being the coolest aunt she is, she takes you to lavish places (that she rented so she wouldn’t have to bear being in the presence of those indisputable critters society calls men), gets you the most high quality makeup (that her tribe handcrafts—yes they make they’re own it’s a hc of mine), does monthly over the phone (in person when you can) mental check ins (because you love your dad but again, he’s a man, and there’s some things about women men won’t get—vice versa too of course <3)
womanly hour!~ well more like hours, you spend the whole day with boa whenever you can, she’s makes a magnificent aunt and literally never says no to you. She’s like to you how she is to luffy but less delusional platonic <3 you two go shopping and pick out clothes together, her tribe of course also gifts you all the cute clothes you could ever want (again, handcrafted) because boa adores you and they adore boa!—which means they adore you! 💕 You and the Kuja 100% get along and see eye to eye on how spectacular Hancock-Sama is~ 🥰
when your older you probably go over to visit her more often and maybe even on your own! Mihawk trusts that by then he’s trained you enough, plus i think he would have his certain set of rules but not be too strict of a dad.
teaching you how to be a proper woman with Boa 101 ;} only if you want to tho! She’ll ensure your not out here acting like some monkey—surely your not! (unless you are 🤷‍♀️) Still, she teaches you basic lady manners. :) More than anything she knows women is NOT the problem, so instead of going “keep your legs closed ☝️🤓” she says “If a man looks at you lower than your stomach, kick him in that area 😉😘” - Boa Hancock (the woman we trust💪)
AND you already know she’s gonna teach you how to kick as hard a she can 😤😮‍💨👌 which ngl by the time your older your sure to be a master in many Haki’s. You may even have conquer’s 🤷‍♀️ I wouldn’t doubt it you got Mihawk blood in you :P
Growing up Boa has constantly been warning you of men and they’re vile ways. When you become of age she’ll tell you what happened to her (that’s how much she trusts you 💗💗) and you’ll know what she means right away. She will always look out for you but gives you tips on things just in case, and if you ever feel unsafe, don’t hesitate to call her or take a trip to the island of women! The entirety of the Kuja tribe will lay down they’re lives in an instant for Hancock-sama’s lovable little niece <33
I’ve been mentioning this throughout but her taking you to the island of women definitely happens. You love it there and everyone loves you. You have so many Aunts and sisters there it’s not even funny. 😃 You adore each and everyone of them though, just as they do you. You get only the finest of treatment from them and you might as well be one of the Boa sisters. You get all you can eat premium food, the most elegant clothes tailored to your exact size and tastes, you even have your very OWN room in the Palace! Sandersonia and Marigold dote on you just as much as Hancock does the four of you very much do spend a lot of time together. 😊
The Boa sisters/the Kuja tribe teaches you the kuja tribe/survival skills personally. They start with bow and arrow and eventually moving on to haki and hand to hand combat. Now, Mihawk might have already covered this but they’re going over it again 😄 why? He might’ve missed something! He’s a man! (Btw the Kuja girls 100% ask you questions about men no holding back) Anywho, I’m sure you’d do it again even if you know it already because 1) practice 😋 and 2) who wouldn’t want to spend more time with the Kuja pirates?!
💖💖
These girls are seriously awesome 💓 (this low key became a Mihawk diss track written by Hancock but he’ll live- LOL 😂😂🗿)
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ARAMINTA: So here we are!
LILAC: Wait - is that thing getting closer? Will I have to ride it?
ARAMINTA: No, you won’t have to ride her. Duchess is only here because she hasn’t quite maxed out TEMPERAMENT, and Dodo’s getting tense moodlets from his lack of skill building. They’re working together.
LILAC: He’s still a Slob?
ARAMINTA: Anyways. 
LILAC: So he’s still a Slob.
ARAMINTA: Welcome back to the third in our series of gardenside chats, where we will be discussing what’s different about Round One-
LILAC: And whether my sanity will survive the journey.
ARAMINTA: Now this will be the first time when eliminations occur. Once all the households are played, a final points table will be tallied, and we will unfortunately have to bid a sad farewell to three contestants.
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LILAC: Oh, I can think of one or two who you wouldn’t be sad about.
ARAMINTA: It’s about who you take to, Lilac, not me. This will also be the first round where a skill building system comes into play. Basically at the end of your household’s rotation, your total sum of skills will be added up, and they will count towards your points along with friendship and romance.
LILAC: And while I obviously can’t be eliminated - although it would make quite a plot twist if I was - my skills have been cheated back down to zero too. Apart from PAINTING and KNITTING since those are tied to already completed aspirations, and WELLNESS since I have a glitch where I won’t run anywhere.
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ARAMINTA: Also since this is the first time contestants will be playable for the Watcher, we will learn what they think of you in terms of attraction level.
LILAC: Oh, I have a pretty good indication already. (winks)
ARAMINTA: Attraction level as well as compatibility and sentiments will also remain. As the Watcher is using the time decayed version of First Impressions, those sentiments will eventually fade - with hopefully new ones to replace them.
LILAC: So in sum, a contestant’s score will come from friendship, romance, skill, attraction, compatibility and any positive sentiments?
ARAMINTA: Exactly. Moving on - we have some viewer submitted questions. This one is for Lilac - alright, don’t be concerned with what my feelings may be. 
LILAC: You are a precious blonde pony and we should always be concerned with your feelings.
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ARAMINTA: Thank you, but please don’t worry. On Mad About Dodo, did you want me to win?
LILAC: Initially, no. It’s not that I didn’t want you to win, but that I took time to warm to you.
ARAMINTA: (wryly) That I hear a lot.
LILAC: What won me over was the second day, when Dodo made a joke that was uncomfortable for Lyric and you called him out. I thought ‘okay, this girl is genuine. She has principles - she’s not just telling Dodo what he wants to hear. She’s not afraid to risk her place in the competition to do what she thinks is right.’ And maybe he thought as much too.
ARAMINTA: He wouldn’t have meant to make them uncomfortable. But I wanted him to apologise, or at least to not make jokes like that to them ever again.
LILAC: And you weren’t even that close to Lyric, were you?
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ARAMINTA: I liked them, and have a lot of admiration and respect for them. However I didn’t bond with them as much as I did some others. Perhaps if we had spent more time together.
LILAC: We’ve seen how saying anything other than someone being your best friend forever can get twisted, but nothing wrong with that. If anything it’s more admirable that you stepped up for someone else when you had a much stronger bond with Dodo at the time.
ARAMINTA: Awww, thank you so much, Lilac! Next question: which contestants are you looking forward to spending more time with the most?
LILAC: Basically anyone who I felt like I still didn’t have a sense of after the introductions, though I get that three hours in front of live cameras isn’t exactly the most natural and authentic setting in the world. Piper - I’ll be looking to see if there’s a spark. We vibed but we had no romance at the end of our time, although it’s very early in the competition still.
ARAMINTA: Exactly. I had no romance with Dodo at the end of his introductory round, as did a lot of other castmates who eventually fared well.
LILAC: Well you had Leo to contend with. If ‘buzzkill’ were a pixel…
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ARAMINTA: (laughs) He’s not so bad.
LILAC: Neither is bacteria in small quantities. Another is Sage. I feel like she was a bit… intimidated, maybe? Hopefully she’ll be more at home once we’re together in a household. Okay, question for you now. What advice will you give to the contestants?
ARAMINTA: Make friends. Not out of some kind of strategy - this isn’t Simsvivor - but because this is such an unique experience, and you’ll want to have people through the other side who get it. Also life will just be easier for you and you’ll have less regrets if you do. 
LILAC: Right. Plus I’m only one Sim so you’re gonna need to fill your social meter in other ways. Also being LOYAL traited, I’m looking not just at how someone gets along with me - but how they treat everyone else around them.
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ARAMINTA: (silence)
LILAC: I am, Minta - I swear! (laughs) Trust me, I know the difference between what I’m looking for in a partner and someone who may or may not be a good-
ARAMINTA: And sometimes a pixel simply needs a change of scenery to make life changes. One of the most important things I learned from Mad About Dodo is that not everyone comes into their save file with the ideal set of circumstances for them to thrive.
LILAC: Oh, thriving at villainy is still thriving. And another for you: why did you take this gig?
ARAMINTA: While I don’t think it was down to any malice, I felt like the contestants on Mad About Dodo could have - and should have - been better protected.
LILAC: Yeah, you were in the hands of a megalomaniac who viewed you all as dolls from his toy box and had fun with you accordingly.
ARAMINTA: Leo is… impulsive. Not uncaring, but impulsive. And he tends to be more of a ‘big picture’ thinker and not so considerate of the finer details. Anyway, once I learned that a bachelorette would be held in my home world, I wanted to do what I could to ensure that the cast would have a safer experience. With it being in Henford, I felt some kind of… ownership and responsibility, I suppose you could say.
LILAC: Two very foreign concepts to some others.
ARAMINTA: Not being the producer or the director, I won’t have as much pull. As the host, however, I hope that I can be an advocate for the needs of the contestants. Along that note: any concerns so far?
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LILAC: The competition has attracted a lot of outdoorsy, country types. Which I get, given- (waves hand at the lot). And they should do well. I’m not concerned about that. But I’m a city girl through and through. There’s something about a place with some… bustle, that makes me come alive in my bones.
ARAMINTA: Normally I’m the anxious one. I think that’s more of a question for the fourth round.
LILAC: I think so too.
ARAMINTA: And if it comes down to that? Well, there’s one residential lot in San Myshuno that isn’t an apartment. Finally: can we deduce anything at all from the introductory round?
LILAC: That you’re a much better host than Leo?
ARAMINTA: (laughs) Oh, too rude!
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LILAC: But true! You didn’t completely centre yourself, and you knew when to fade into the background and when to come forward and keep the conversation going. And you didn’t wow-wow with any-
ARAMINTA: And that is all for now! Best of luck to you, Lilac. Just continue to be genuine - and try to have a good time with it. What wasn’t shown so much on screen was that hardships aside, we did also have some fun on the island. This is an adventure and the opportunity of a lifetime, after all.
LILAC: An adventure I can undertake without even leaving my home lot? Perfect for a LAZY sim.
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household one: day one should go up at 10 pm* my time
*GMT 10 am |  EST 5 am |  PST 2 am
lyric by @micrathene-w, dodo by @akitasimblr
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iamleesi · 7 months ago
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THE HUNTERS & THE SOLDIER
Pairing: Avenger! Bucky Barnes x OC! Avenger Reader
Summary: You have some kind of nightmare and Bucky wakes you up but he’s still a prick and you have a fight.
Warnings: Flashback, mention of experiments, hydra facility, creepy stuff and I probably forgot something so forgive me. -> 18+ !!
Other: English isn’t my fist language so I apologize for eventual mistakes.
-> Masterlist
-> Part three ; Part five
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-> Nonie (04)
A little you was sitting in the corner of your room. The place you called home was clean and sterile, empty of any unnecessary comforts - not that you knew what the word truly meant. The only source of light was coming from the single light bulb hung from the ceiling, and your bed - big enough to at least fit you - was pushed against a wall, it’s thin mattress covered in white sheets.
The walls were bare; you were not given anything normal kids your age had to at least make it seem more than just a prison. It was naked of any type of decoration, no pictures or paintings… just plain grey. And you loved it.
One day, your usual routine was changed. Up until then you had been alone, the only people you talked to were the scientists and Mrs White who came in to see how you were doing and tell you all about the process they were making thanks to you. But that day, you remember the sound of that huge, scratched iron door open and an Hydra agent escorting a girl into the room.
Not a word was exchanged before you and the new person were left alone. To be honest, you were curious but also confused - why did they brought her in all of a sudden? Was she another special girl? Were you not good enough anymore? You didn’t like that idea.
You watched as she went to sit on the other corner of the room, her head low, and you spent the whole day listening to her sobbing. Why was she crying, you did not know. How could she cry when she was in the safest place on earth?
Ungrateful. And she was evidently older than you, maybe sixteen or even seventeen - she should have understood her worth already at that age.
In the days that followed, you learned absolutely nothing about her. She never spoke and she spent most of her time confined to her side of the room - she wasn’t even given a mattress, and she did nothing to let you know if perhaps she was tired of sleeping on the floor. All you heard were her hums at night, melodies you didn’t know.
But for some reason, you liked having her there.
Eventually, days turned into weeks and your curiosity towards her only grew and it almost became an obsession - you wanted to get her to talk but never succeeded. Each day, like a clockwork, the girl was escorted out of the room by Hydra agents and each day, when she would return, her demeanor grew more unsettling.
“And so today Mrs White gave me a candy. She said I deserved it after I found where those criminals were hiding.” You said, hopping onto your bed as you stared at her - she was finally given one too, and now she did nothing rather than lay on it as days passed by. “Did she ever give you a candy? The one that looks like a bear - have you ever seen a bear?”
At your questions, all you could hear was nothing except her breathing. There wasn’t even a window in there. “Oh, yeah. You don’t talk. Mrs White says that when people ignore you, they are being extremely dis- dispec - I don’t remember the word she used. But it’s not nice!”
Nothing. She didn’t even blink, sometimes you had to walk over there to check if she was still breathing. “Whatever.” You sighed. “I’ll bring you a candy next time I’m done with a successful mission. Maybe you’ll talk to me. Or I can steal one - maybe I could. I don’t know. What do you think? Do you want a candy?”
Silence.
“Alright. Then I’ll bring you one.” You smiled at her. “But you need to tell me your name, I can’t keep referring to you as the ‘new girl’, it’s been… I don’t know. But surely more than a day!”
The girl stayed silent. Her eyes fixated on the ceiling.
“Mrs White says my blood is fundamental for whatever they’re working on, you know? We’re here to save the world.” You continued. “She said there are some people who don’t want that, like Natasha Romanoff. The prodigy of the Red Room, have you ever met her? She came here a few years ago and taught me how to shoot properly. And now, turns out that she’s been corrupted.” You sighed “You’re a great listener, at least.” You turned around, giving your back to her. Maybe she just didn’t like you.
Still, no response. Not even a hum of acknowledgement.
Your frustration mounted with each passing day, your attempts to communicate with her were always ignored and you were met with nothing but silence.
“Is there something wrong, kid?” One of Hydra’s agents, Ezra you had learnt, asked you one day as he was escorting you back to your room after another evening of restless training. You had to be at your best, they said, all the time.
“No.” You sighed, as your body felt like burning - that day they had gone heavy on you, but you managed well. You were the only survivor, as per usual. “When can I go outside? I want to help on the field.”
“Soon enough, kid. We have a problem in stars and stripes to take care of. Mrs White believes you can do it.”
You felt a sense of pride in you at his words. That man, they called him Captain America, was a heavy problem for the world. He was the one who kept ruining any attempt to make the world a better place, always stepping in to cause chaos. He needed to be eliminated and you wished it would be you to do so, after all you had the skills to do it.
“Then I won’t disappoint her.”
Once you got back to your room with the biggest grin ever, you saw Nonie - as you nicknamed her - sitting on her bed with her back on the wall, staring straight ahead of her. You sat right in her line of view, which was on your mattress, crossing your legs one over the other. “Guess what?”
Blank stare.
“I’ll kill Mr Captain America one of these days. I know I’m not as skilled as Winter is, but I can do it. I know I can.” You started to ramble convinced that she wouldn’t pay attention to you since she never did, but soon enough, too focused on your own words, you felt a hand on your tight.
A cold, almost imperceptible touch. She had walked towards you, kneeling down in the end as her legs were too weak to hold her light weight for longer than a few steps.
You stared into her soulless eyes for a moment, before she shook her head.
“No? What - what do you mean no?” You looked at her dumbfounded. “You don’t want me to kill him? Nonie, I h-”
But before you could continue, she crawled back to her bed in the same position she was in. You stayed silent too, for a moment. For a long, tense moment.
“So you can understand what I’m saying! You can hear me!” You realized, getting up. “Why won’t you talk to me?”
Nonie made a movement with her pale hand to tell you to get closer to her - which you did without second thinking. Those few steps felt like happening in slow motion and once you were right in front of her, she raised that same hand to her mouth; her fingers grazing the edge of her lips.
You frowned, but you didn’t have the time to utter a word that she stuck out her tongue - or what was left of it.
“For fuck’s sake - Emma!” Your eyes snapped open at Bucky’s voice, your heart racing in your chest as you sat up in bed, your forehead almost colliding against his.
You couldn’t help but dream about her, giving what you and Dean had saw just hours prior. She always came back into your memories one way or another, whether it was with a nightmare or just with a simple thought during the day - she was always there, in the back of your mind. And no matter how much years had passed since then, Nonie wasn’t going to go away anytime soon.
Before you could gather your thoughts, Bucky spoke again with a sharp tone. “What the fuck is wrong with you? I’ve been trying to wake you up the whole night.”
You blinked in confusion, caught off guard by his harsh tone and the fact that he was sitting so close to you. “I’m sorry.” Your voice was barely above a whisper. “I had a nightmare.”
Bucky’s expression unexpectedly softened, though you could still sense some irritation. You knew he had trouble sleeping too, and waking up in the middle of the night due to someone else’s problems wasn’t really ideal. “Nightmare, huh? Great, now we’re both awake.”
You closed your eyes and took a breath for a moment as you tried to find the right words to say. You never meant to disturb him but you could not control how your mind worked - and Wanda wasn’t even there to help you. Sometimes you gave her permission to get inside your head and erase the bad memories for one night so you could properly rest, but she wasn’t with you and so you had to do it alone. “I didn’t mean to wake you up.”
Bucky let out a heavy sigh, his demeanor softening ever so slightly. “Look, I’m sorry for snapping at you.” He admitted gruffly. He better than anyone could understand how you mist be feeling, and he could have approached it better. “It’s been a long day and I guess I’m just on edge.”
You huffed. “Believe me, I know.”
Bucky exhaled as he was still sitting on your bed, the situation becoming awkward. He got up, but didn’t leave quite yet. You saw some uncertainty in his eyes before he spoke again.
“Food always helps me with nightmares.” He cleared his throat, his tone softer than before. But not much, he was still Bucky Barnes after all. “Come downstairs with me. Dean left some pizza in the fridge before leaving.”
You noticed you were hungry now that he mentioned food. Once you and Dean got home after the investigation, still unsure of what you saw - or, rather, still hoping your mind had played an awful joke on you, you went straight in your room. You had left the task to explain things to Sam and Bucky to Dean.
“One thing I learned about Dean is that he becomes a mad man if someone touches his food.” You let out a small chuckle, getting up the bed.
“He left it for you.” Bucky admitted.
“Oh.” That was surprising. “I was going to eat it anyway but I will feel less guilty knowing it was already mine.”
Together you made your way downstairs to the kitchen, the silence was oddly comfortable for once. You sat down while Bucky took the pizza box from the fridge and tossed it your way. Action you thanked with a smile.
He rummaged through the cabinets searching for something to eat himself. He sat on the chair beside yours with a box of homemade biscuits - wait, homemade biscuits?
“The old lady that lives on the other side of the street brought these over today, when you and Dean were at the Miller’s house.” He explained after reading your expression. “We’re invited at her niece’s birthday party this weekend, by the way. I said yes.”
You being invited to a party full of strangers wasn’t really on the list of the things you liked to do since you were as social as a rock but what you wanted went into the toilet the second you became an Avenger. Like that time you and Pietro were sent on a mission on a yacht - you were scared as hell of the sea after a certain God of Mischief made you watch Titanic changing the finale with your face instead of Rose’s. But that was another story.
“Great.” You sighed.
“So, the investigation. How did it go? You came home quite traumatized.” He raised a brow, and you didn’t miss the judgement in his tone.
You stiffened for a second, your mind went inevitably back there just as soon as you were starting to think about something else. “I wasn’t traumatized. I just… if you had seen that, you would have understood.”
Bucky scoffed. “What? Seeing the breakdown of an hysterical old lady after she lost her daughter doesn’t seem so terrible compared to what we’re used to, come on now.”
You frowned. That was the last of your concerns, you weren’t a therapist or something but a breakdown was certainly not that woman’s biggest problem. “Dean didn’t- he didn’t tell you everything?”
It was Bucky’s time to frown. “He told us what happened. You two arrived there, the woman was obviously grieving her missing daughter and she had a break down after asking one too many questions which led to her kicking you out.” He reassumed everything Dean had said. “Isn’t that all?”
You gulped. Dean kept his mouth shut about that, and you wondered why. Bucky knew what Hydra was capable of, but that? That was something beyond imaginable. Still, before talking to Bucky about it you wanted to know why Dean kept it a secret and why he didn’t seem to freak out as any other normal person would - beside you.
“No, that’s all.” You said after a moment, sounding as sincere as possible. “It’s just… her daughter’s probably dead and… and seeing her reaction wasn’t easy.”
“Mh.” He nodded, seeming to believe you. “Rich coming from you.” He said after, turning back into himself - for a second there you almost forgot how infuriating he was.
“Excuse me?”
“Rich coming from you.” He repeated casually. “Didn’t you use to kidnap people yourself for Hydra? Or maybe… bring back the ones lucky enough to break free from their control?
You stayed momentarily silent. “No.” You answered. “I never kidnapped anyone or brought back anyo- what the fuck is your problem, man?”
“I have absolutely zero problems, but I wonder if you even have the right to feel bad when you used to do the same to innocent people - willingly.” His tone was as light as if he was talking about a damn football game.
“You killed dozens of people too.”
“I was brainwashed, and I feel guilty enough. You were not.” He fired back. “And you never apologized.”
“I was a fucking child, Barnes.” You reminded him, clenching your jaw. “I thought I was doing the right thing by complying, just like you were!”
“I know that, Dayne, I’m not an idiot. But you’ve been indoctrinated with their ideas all your life, which is exactly why I wonder how the fuck it is that you’re on our side now.” He said, leaning back on the chair. “I’m not attacking you, just curious.”
“It’s been ten years, it took me a long time to see things the right way.” You said, really stopping the urge to flip the table and walk out dramatically. “And it looks like an attack to me.”
“It’s not.” He remarked. “You know, Rumlow was a SHIELD agent while being loyal to Hydra. If he did it, I won’t get off the table the fact that you could be doing the same.”
“I never joined Hydra willingly, I was born there!” You shot back to that lunatic asshole. “Rumlow joined those people because he believed in their ideas, to me their ideas were the only thing I’ve ever known! Excuse me if I didn’t know a difference between the good and the bad when I was told that killing people was the only way humanity could survive!”
He sighed at that. Maybe he had been too harsh?
“You’ve been brainwashed in a way, and I in another. If you think I’m some kind of monster for what I did or I cannot be trusted, then we may not be so different.” You spat while pulling yourself up from the chair with force, the legs scrapping against the floor. “And if you wake me up again I’ll stick that metal arm up your ass.”
With that, you left him in the kitchen alone. Fuck him and fuck whatever his problem was.
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writeawaythepain · 8 months ago
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Oblivious
Tango Tek x (gn!reader)
Anybody else really miss watching Tango’s videos when he left? 
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Word count: 2.4 k
Prompts:
“I would be nervous too in your shoes. But you’d be telling me that I got this, so I’m telling you: You got this.”
Doing each other's hair.
Summary:
You convince Tango to finally take a break from his new big redstone project by inviting him over for a sleepover. You start to wonder if it was even a good idea, as your normal teasing back-and-forth banter starts to hit a little too close to home when you realize your crush for the redstoner was just getting worse…
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“I would be nervous too, in your shoes,” I try to reassure him with a smile. “ But you’d be telling me that I got this, so I’m telling you: You got this.” You look directly into his fiery red eyes.
“….Aaaa- you’re just making me more stressed!!” Tango yells out dipping the nail polish brush back into the bottle. “Why am I even so stressed?!” 
“Cause I made your nails fabulous, and if you mess mine up I’ll never forgive you.” You answer simply, trying and failing to suppress a smile.
“You did do my nails fabulously, you did…but I think I’m actually going to go for a more abstract look-'' He flashes you a mischievous smile as he slowly lowers the brush closer to your finger, and nowhere near where your actual nail was. You instantly pull away, gasping in mock offense.
“Don’t you dare-“ You start.
“Wha -at, do you not trust me?!” He says snickering. You eye him suspiciously.
”Not when you say things like that!”
Your plan for making sure Tango took a break from his new big project was going well so far. Sure you felt a little childish when bringing up the idea of a sleepover, but Tango’s enthusiasm dashed most of your concerns instantly…Most, that is, except for your growing concern that you may love your friend in more ways than just platonic….
You usually always push those feelings to the back burner, not wanting to ruin the thing you two already had going, but seeing the way he stuck out his tongue in concentration while still managing to get polish all over your finger wasn’t helping. ”How are you so bad at this?“ You tease, smiling.
”I- you shush! I’m trying, ok! You keep squirming-“ He says trying to readjust his positioning by grabbing and tilting your hand slightly.
”I’m not squirming! I’m laughing. At you.” You say still giggling. He huffs, and eventually decides that his technique wasn’t working, and decides to try a new one. He gets up from his cross-legged position on the floor, pulling his knees up and toward himself to form a resting place for your wrist. His grip on your hand tightens a little as he yanks you closer.
”Just shut up and come here-” The rest of your body follows your hand, and you scooch closer to him, shutting up. Tango doesn’t even seem to notice your close proximity, too focused on trying to paint your nails neatly. After a few more beats of flustered (on your part) silence, he looks up beaming. “There, first hand done!” 
You blink, your brain still catching up, before you inspect his work. The first finger he did was quite bad- unevenly painted and there was some color accidentally splotched onto your skin. But each nail got progressively better, and all in all… “Well- I’ve had worse. And I like the color!” He’d picked a bright red for you, a shade that reminded you of his bright eyes. You picked your favorite color for his nails, and you now wonder if he did the same.
”Ok- ok! See- I’m learning!” He says before holding out his hand again, “other one?”
You give him your other hand, and are forced to look at his adorably concentrated face again as he paints your other nails. You start talking to distract yourself. “So I assume this is your first time ever doing this?”
”Zed’s painted my nails before- but it was with some kinda poison for one of his science-y experiment-o thingies.” If he had been talking about anyone else you might’ve questioned it, but it was Zedaph, so you weren’t really even surprised. “I’ve never painted someone else’s before- no.” He responds not looking up, still entirely focused.
”Really, I couldn’t tell?” You say sarcasm dripping from your voice as you smile. He looks up at you for a second just to roll his eyes.
“I thought I told you to shush-“ He says, almost scolding if it wasn’t for the smile on his face. He rolls his shoulders, and it seems like being hunched over in concentration was starting to make him sore, so he instead leans back a little, pulling you even closer, and holds your forearm between his knees. Ok- this was getting ridiculous, there was no way your face wasn’t getting a bit red now. 
“Do you want me to just detach my hand and give it to you?” You laugh trying to keep your composure.
”No- “ He laughs, seemingly oblivious to your suffering. “-I like you just as you are, all in one piece thanks.” You chuckle, looking anywhere but directly at him until he finally finishes, and releases your hand. ”Done! Now don’t you look absolutely fanta-bulous! The color really suits you-“ He cheers, sending you a wink that makes you wonder if he was doing this on purpose.
The second hand looks even better than the first, and if you were being honest, it really warmed your heart that he tried so hard. “It does look great, the red makes me feel like a model.” You pose in a silly vogue showing off your nails as if in a commercial, and it succeeds in making Tango laugh. He tries a pose of his own, showing off his nails in front of his face and pursing his lips. He looks at you, and winks. You burst out laughing, and he joins in as you both have goofy smiles on your face. When your laughing finally calms down, Tango looks up at you.
”So, what else do you usually do at sleepovers?” He asks, tilting his head slightly.
”Well…me and my friends would sometimes play truth or dare, or do each other's hair-“ Tango’s eyes light up.
“Why not both! Though, I don’t think there’s much you can do with this mop on my head-“ He responds pointing at his spikey blonde hair, “I kinda just have to let it do what it wants.”
You squint at it, sizing up his hairdo like it was a challenge. “I think I can figure something out…”
”Go ahead! Be my guest.” He says sitting up and taking off the goggles he had on. 
You get up to grab some supplies from the bathroom, before returning and kneeling down behind him, trying to find a longer chunk of hair that you can work with. Satisfied with finding a section near his pointy ears, you start braiding. “Right, you go first. Truth or dare?”
”Well, I can’t really move- so truth? I did not think this through, huh?” He chuckles, and you pull on his hair slightly to keep him still.
”Stop moving!” You say, laughing as well. You think for a second, trying to come up with a good question. “Ok…When you first met me, what was your first impression of me?”
Tango smiles, and flushes slightly as he thinks back on the moment, remembering it fondly. You're too focused to notice. “Well- If I’m being a hundred percent honest. I just thought you looked really cool! But in kinda a like- a slightly intimidating way, you know?” You spare him an odd look.
”Really?” You ask, finishing up the first little braid before gently tilting his head the other way to do the same thing on the other side.
”Yea! Then, I got to know you and realized you're just a big ole softy!” He says chuckling. You roll your eyes and shake your head, but you don���t stop the small smile that spreads across your face.
”Yea, yea, whatever.” You chuckle, focusing back on his hair.
”Your turn now, truth or dare?” Tango asks.
“Truth, I’m still trying to finish this braid-“ He takes a moment to respond, giving you just enough time to finish the second braid, so you tie it to the end of the first one, forming a sort of halo around the back of his head.
”What’s a secret you’ve never told anyone?” He asks. One instantly pops to mind, but you shake your head, dismissing it instantly.
”Actually, nevermind, I'm finished. I switch to my choice to dare.” Tango turns around to face you, almost pouting.
”Wha- You can’t do that!”
”Yes I can, and look!” You pull out a hand mirror you brought and show him what you’ve done to his hair, his frown instantly turns into an excited smile.
”Woah- it’s so cute!” He says, turning his head a little to inspect the braids, grinning. 
”You are! And your hair looks nice too.” You say shooting him wink, he laughs but you swear you saw his face get a little pink. He looks off to the side like he’s thinking, and then turns back to you with a toothy smirk.
”Alright, I thought of a dare. Give me your absolutely worst pick up line. Just- the most cheesy, corny, awful pick up line ever.” Your eyebrow raises a little at his request, and you take a moment to think.
”Worst pick up line huh…? That’s hard cause we both know how amazing I am at flirting.” You say sarcastically, just buying yourself some time to think of something clever.
Tango laughs, “Yep, uh huh. Totally. You're like, the flirting master.” He teases back.
Finally a really stupid one comes to mind, “Tango, are you a campfire? Because you’re hot and I totally want s’more-“ You say, barely able to get it out without laughing.
Tango stares at you blankly for a moment, before his face reddens and he bursts out laughing. “That- that’s actually terrible.”
“Hey you asked! I’m starting to think you just like the idea of me flirting with you.” You joke, turning your back to him so he could do your hair. Instead, he decides to lean forward and whisper directly into your ear.
“Maybe I do~” He pulls back and starts laughing, but you're frozen. Your face feels flushed and you try to calm your racing heart. You keep reminding yourself that it was all just a joke, that you needed to calm down or you’d risk making it weird. “Aw, too much?” He asks.
“I- just-” You stutter.
“Well too bad, it’s my payback for you not letting me work on my redstone stuff.” He says gently running his hands through your hair and…you were just now realizing how bad of an idea this all was. You were supposed to be getting over your feelings for the hot tempered blaze, but instead you’ve found yourself falling for him even more.
“Yea well, that’s what I get for being a good friend I guess.” You chuckle, but it comes out a bit strained. 
“Friends? Is that all we are?” Tango asks slightly…disappointed?
“Alright Tango enough with the jokes, you keep doing that I might actually fall for you.” You try to keep up your chipper and teasing tone, but your voice wavered towards the end.
Tango stops playing with your hair, and moves in front of you again. He seems nervous, and looks down at his hands a lot. You don’t dare hope, you don’t let yourself think anything, too scared to lose the friendship that you two had, no matter how much you cared for him.
“Maybe…uhh…maybe I might’ve actually been the one, that has done the falling…for…you.” He ends it with a dry chuckle, wringing his hands and struggling to keep eye contact. When you don’t respond right away, he finally looks at you. You search his eyes, searching for any sign that this was all some sort of weird bit.
“Are- are you being for real…or…” You finally ask, still not sure.
“Uh…yea? I mean…I thought I was making it obvious and all but I guess...” For some reason you feel tears well up in your eyes. “...Ah! Oh my gosh, I’m sorry I shouldn’t have-” You interrupt him, quickly wiping the tears from your eyes.
“No! No it’s fine I’m just- I’m glad! I promise!” You reassure him, a huge smile spreading across your lips. His eyes are still wide with concern, and slight confusion.
“Wait so- I’m confused. Do you also…?” You bob your head up and down, laughing a bit as you try to regain your composure after the roller coaster of emotions that had been the past few minutes.
“Yes, Tango. Obviously, I’ve fallen for you too.” You finally respond, he grins and grabs both your hands in his.
“Well, obviously- neither of us are really good at reading the obvious-” He snickers, gently stroking your hand with his thumb. 
You giggle, “Wow, and now someone has spilled about their crush, we’ve checked, like, all the sleepover boxes but-”
“-but sleeping?” Tango asks, quirking an eyebrow.
“No? No one sleeps at sleepovers, come on dude-” You respond and he laughs, “the only thing we haven’t done is watch a movie!”
“Hey well I’m not complaining. As long as I get to do your hair first, since it was um- interrupted.” He smiles, blushing slightly.
“Why not both!” You say mirroring his tone from earlier.
~ ~ ~
This time when he runs his fingers through your hair, you allow yourself to melt into his touch. You're seated on the ground, while Tango sits on the couch. You're situated between both his legs, as he tries, undos, and retries to braid your hair. You realize you don’t really mind if he ever gets it right, you're just glad to finally relax with the knowledge that he loved being near you just as much as you loved being near him.
”Ok…I’m done…I think?” You hear Tango’s voice from behind you. You haven’t really been paying attention to the movie much, instead just enjoying the redstoner's company, so you lean over and grab the hand mirror.
”Aww, I love it.” You giggle a little,  “But…maybe don’t quit your day job, hot stuff.” You tilt your head up to see his reaction, and he just rolls his eyes and snickers before leaning down and closer to your face.
”Is it good enough to get a little somethin’ at least? For trying?” He smirks, leaning just a little closer. Now it’s your turn to roll your eyes, but you smile and sit up, turning slightly, before gently grabbing his collar, and meeting him in the middle. And you swear, when his lips hit yours, you feel fireworks.
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blackberry-s0da · 10 months ago
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Gonna make a big post to try to answer this.
My characters are inspired by lots of thing things (and lots of artists), Machete wasn’t an inspiration in particular to be honest, it’s a fully fleshed character with a specific white-black-red aesthetic, catholic imagery, blood, violence, hate, guilt and by the latest posts, love too. Mercy barely has a name for now, I haven’t been able yet to make a story, place him in a specific historical context or do as much as design his clothes.
Regarding physical similarities I actually took most of the poses and general vibes for Mercy from paintings depicting naked women (mainly form renaissance) as i liked how soft and peaceful they looked;
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(Machete lives on that time period if I’m not wrong so there’s also that. Mercy doesn’t have a spot in any timeline yet, but I’ve depicted him in modern clothes once and I think I’ll eventually place him in a modern setting)
Another inspiration was actually the artist Babezord, specifically for Mercy’s color palette and face pattern as seen in the image below. Many characters count with this mask like pattern and I’ve always loved it;
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(funnily enough on this character it is an actual mask)
The similarities on style are due a few factors: I learned to draw dogs mostly from Canisalbus, I’ve been following their work since I was around 13 or 14 I believe? Maybe earlier, and I learned a lot of things from them for the most part. On top of that I also love sighthounds and mostly draw that type of dogs as I’ve been having them as pets since childhood and always found them very pretty. I currently have two greyhounds.
Another artist I’ve leaned from are Lilaira, putrid.hound, canisinfernalis and mischievousdog, amongst others so shoutout to them too.
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I believe that Canisalbus characters are more stylized and fancy looking, they’re more lean and lanky for the most part, their hands are small and delicate, characters are very expressive and culturally rich, the clothing and pieces of background are beautifully detailed, their pieces usually tell a story, Mercy in the other hand was recently picked up from a mental trashcan I had him on as he’s my oldest and probably less used oc (he used to be a she but I decided to keep the name, that’s as much as he has for now, besides two scraped background stories). I designed them when I was a teen for lots of vent art and didn’t like how he looked (plus the negativeness I attached him to) so he’s been pretty much abandoned until September of 2023 when I redesigned them. Also gotta add that, while he isn’t a self insert he’s been used for the most part to reflect things about me and how I feel at the moment.
I believe my art is similar in many aspects to the one of Canisalbus, but not remotely close to being as amazing as theirs, I wouldn’t say were identical but I do take inspiration on them, amongst other artists.
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clean-bands-dirty-stories · 6 months ago
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Breathe ~ D.W. (part 9)
A/n: Been ages huh? I always come back to this series eventually I love it too much. So here’s another installment after ages. I suppose I’ll never be free of it lol. Hope y’all enjoy!!
MASTERLIST
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When the TARDIS lurched under their feet, Y/n knew something was wrong. Then it sputtered and Rose caught herself on the railing and the trio all exchanged looks. “What’s this then?” Rose bit. She had been trying extra hard recently to keep things cheery. It had been rough on Y/n, which had been rough on the Doctor, so she had to give more effort than usual to draw them into bantering with her.
Well, maybe Y/n.
The Doctor had a knack for bouncing back.
It showed now as they finally parked and he shrugged, slinging his arm over her shoulders as they all slipped out of the door, Y/n leading them. “I don’t know. It’s like she didn’t want to land. Like she’s having a hard time…”
“Like this place makes her sick,” Y/n offered in more clarification. He felt it on the edges of himself. Something roiling just under the surface. It reminded him that they were connected and that made him anxious. Or maybe she was anxious and he was just feeling it. It seemed the longer he was part of this journeying the stronger the link between them got and the harder it was to distinguish what was him, what was Doctor, and what was TARDIS.
Rose raised an eyebrow, looking over at Y/n. “Well if it’s going to be trouble we can always just… pop back in. Head out.” Her tone lilted with humor and Y/n found himself smiling even before the other two burst out laughing.
“I think… we’re in a cupboard. Come on.” And off they went. They wandered, doors opening and closing, announcing themselves every time. The Doctor went on about humanity and their bases and the things they were made for and it was like every other time. Y/n had long since learned when to engage and when it was okay to space out. Keeping present was growing more and more difficult so he tried not to pull himself.
Perhaps that’s why he so quickly saw the writing on the wall when they entered the new room. “Welcome to Hell,” Rose echoed and the Doctor teased her about it but she laughed and pointed it out. And then suddenly the Doctor was frowning just like Y/n was.
On the wall was spray painted the phrase Rose had read aloud. But underneath there were symbols. Definitely a language, but not one that was translated for them. Not one they could automatically understand.
“Well that’s not right,” Y/n mumbled.
“What does it say?” Rose asked.
The Doctor shot forward to get a closer look and Rose followed but Y/n stayed back. That queasy feeling had grown the closer they’d gotten to this room and Y/n was not a fan. “I don’t know - it won’t translate.” He sounded as disturbed by that as Y/n felt.
Rose looked between the writing and the Doctor. “But I thought the TARDIS translated everything, writing as well.” They both looked back to where Y/n was standing and it shocked him to realize they were looking to him for answers on what was going on with the TARDIS. It made sense but it was more pressure than he liked. Is this how the Doctor always felt?
“It feels… wrong.” He shrugged and the Doctor’s eyebrows furrowed even more.
“Well it’s old for sure,” the Doctor tried. “Very old. Impossibly old.” He stood and began to open the next door. “We should find who’s in charge. If we’ve gone beyond the reach of the TARDIS that’s never good news.” The door began to open and Y/n took a step after them but froze with shock at the mass of figures on the other side of it.
The Doctor and Rose weren’t so lucky. They almost rammed into the creatures and screamed in shock. The Doctor began to babble and charm like he always did, immediately trying to get a way in so he could take control and get the information he needed. His banter was ignored.
“We must feed,” the creatures said in unison. Little lamps they all held light up when their voices echoed and with them having no visible mouth Y/n distantly wondered if the little lamps were maybe somehow also the source of the voices. The creatures had tentacles where lips should be and a tube coming out from between them attaching to the little light. Y/n took a step back.
“We must feed,” echoed the words from the hoard beyond the door.
“You’ve got to what?” The Doctor asked, immediately off put by the lack of a response to anything he’d said.
“We must feed,” the creatures echoed again.
“Yeah I think they mean us,” Rose snapped and yanked the Doctor back as the Ood pushed through the doorway and into the room. The pair ran right into Y/n who spun with them to run and found the door on the other side of the room had opened at one point as well and more Ood were coming from there as well. When had it opened?
“We must feed,” echoed over and over, overlapping and disconnecting so it wasn’t in sync anymore. The Ood approached closed and closed and closed until the trio was backed against the wall. The Doctor took out his sonic screwdriver, Rose grabbed a chair and Y/n put himself in front of them for safety. And then…
Suddenly they all stopped. “We must feed,” said the one in the very front. Then he looked down at the little light he was carrying and shook it until it flickered and then hit it once. “You. If you are hungry.” His eyes crinkled in what Y/n knew was an attempt at a smile.
The Doctor was the first to switch back into a friendly mode. “Sorry?” He asked gently.
“We apologize,” the Ood began again. “Electromagnetics have interfered with speech systems. Would you like some refreshment?” Rose slowly put the chair down and Y/n relaxed. The Doctor grabbed his hand to ground him. He’d gotten a lot more affectionate with small stuff like that. Little things to help keep Y/n here with them instead of spacing out again.
As they tried to come up with a response another door opened, this one announcing itself properly like the others had. “What the hell?” A man was on the other side. He wore a gray shirt, black leather jacket and dog tags. Behind him was a black haired man and a black woman, both with guns. The trio approached those they were clearly stunned to see on their ship. He raised his wrist to his mouth and spoke into it. “Captain-“
Something distant echoed in Y/n’s mind. Something hollow and echoing. Something ancient. It was an ache in Y/n’s bones, a breath on the back of his neck that made the hairs on his arms stand up. A chill across his spine.
Something was watching them.
There was an alarm, he registered distantly. They were rushing off to meet the captain and everything was shaking and they were holding on for dear life and as his vision blurred he swore he saw something.
Someone.
The eyes were clearest. Y/n couldn’t look away from them. Black pits of eternal darkness one could fall into and never hit the floor. Heat licked across his skin, he was sure of it. He was burning. Someone was screaming. There was blonde cropped hair and a sickening smile and hands reaching out. Black veins on white skin and those symbols…. Everywhere. Not smeared with wear and tear like the paint on the wall. No this was a tattoo. A brand. Y/n looked down at his hands and saw it like up when his fingers pressed together.
A hand in his. He looked over to see Rose this time. Her eyes were on the group in the room. Introductions, names he couldn’t keep on his head. Except… Toby. He wondered why.
His eyes flickered back to his hands. There was nothing there.
He looked up and tried to play it cool. He couldn’t melt down in front of all these strangers. They didn’t seem particularly keen on three strangers showing up out of nowhere and they didn’t need to push their luck. He thanked Rose for her attention to him, and especially to the way she played it off now and didn’t look at him. Kept her comfort private so no one else had to gawk at whatever episode Y/n seemed to be having more and more of.
The names stopped as the woman introducing everyone pulled a lever to reveal where they were and what was going on outside with the storm. “This,” she said as the roof above them began to open. “This is home.”
“Careful,” the captain said from his seat. “The sight of it has driven some people mad.”
Y/n wasn’t too worried. They’d either seen something equivalent or much worse.
He should have maybe been a bit more worried than he was.
When the roof opened enough to actually see they all shot to their feet, eyes wide and lips parted. The thing in front of them… “That’s a black hole,” Rose offered.
“Impossible,” the Doctor breathed. But it was possible. Ida, the woman who had introduced everyone before, met the Doctor’s doubt with hard truth and undeniable fact. They could see it for themselves. There was a black hole and here they were. In orbit around it. Suspended just fine, safe, as stars and planets - whole solar systems - were pulled into the hole and demolished. That was the storm. The desolation of every corner of eternity this black hole could reach as it was all swallowed into oblivion, ramming into an impossible ship kept in place.
A complete breaking of physics. Even the Doctor was stunned.
He kept asking though. Kept getting all the details, every single one, and Rose learned about the Ood.
It was then that Y/n realized he already knew the name of the creatures. When had he started calling them that? When had he simply known what they were called? Was this a new ability? Seeing the past and the future, and now the present as well? Simply knowing things all throughout time?
It could be worse.
Y/n smiled as the Doctor got excited about humans and their gumption and curiosity and borderline stupidity. It was a reminder to himself as well. That not everything was bad. That there was still hope as long as humanity was horribly curious, a little brave, and quite stupid.
As the Doctor was telling them to leave, Ida made a comment that stopped Y/n cold though. “Look who’s talking. How did you get here then?” The Doctor began to ramble about the TARDIS, knowing he couldn’t really explain it, and where they’d parked. How it tended to simply appear places.
Then the captain - Zack - said something that made Y/n realize why the others had gone from suddenly. “In storage six?” Storage six. The Doctor and Y/n realized it at the same time. Earlier Zack had made a comment about how the Earthquake during the storm had taken some of the base out. Strange five through eight.
The Doctor was running but Y/n found himself still. Staying behind. That fear wasn’t there, the emptiness hadn’t settled. He didn’t even have time to wonder if it was shock before the Doctor was back and looking at Y/n. “What is it?” He asked.
Y/n pursed his lips. “I don’t know. It’s like last time. Like I still feel that connection, that draw. She wasn’t dead last time and I… I don’t think she’s gone this time either.” He shrugged. “I know it sounds silly-“
“It’s not silly, it’s impossible,” Zack said flatly. “We don’t have the extra resources to find your ship.”
“It’s fallen to the center - right where you’re already going,” the Doctor tried.
“Not entirely. It’s just off and we can’t afford that. No extra resources, Doctor. Nothing. No exceptions.”
It wasn’t crushing like last time. There was peace to it. Y/n had leaned back against the control panel and now the Doctor joined him, their shoulders touching. The contact was enough. Potentially losing the TARDIS in the other dimension had been world ending but that weight just wasn’t there. The Doctor looked at Y/n with a sort of desperation and it was clear. Perhaps he had lost the TARDIS, but they’d already discussed this once. They didn’t have to again. He had Y/n. Maybe that could be enough.
“I’ve trapped you here.” The Doctor looked at Rose with apology. Maybe he wasn’t spiraling but he still had other things to worry about. Other ways to torture himself.
“Don’t worry so much,” Rose dismissed immediately. “Y/n said-“
“Y/n’s abilities are sometimes even beyond my own,” the Doctor agreed. “But we can’t always depend on that. If something goes wrong… all this means is that the TARDIS isn’t dead. There are other ways to lose people.” He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “We may never get you back to your mother again.”
Immediately Rose shook her head. “We’ll be fine.” The building shook and she leaned into the Doctor. He wrapped his arms around her as Y/n’s cheek pressed to the Doctor’s shoulder. “We’ll be fine,” she whispered again. It was a lot to process but she was handling it a little better with a little bit of home with her. Y/n supposed he made things like this easier for both of them. A sudden pressure to never let anything happen to himself settled on him more than he’d realized before.
Oh boy.
They took a minute and then headed to the mess hall to get some food. The Doctor and Rose went to get food, Rose offering to get Y/n something as well. He nodded, realizing she had seen the headache he was feeling coming on. He sat and waited for the others as images began to press into his mind. Red eyes this time. Lips parted in a scream. A blue box falling into darkness. Orange skin… plastic? A hazmat suit maybe?
“Are you okay?” Rose set a test down in front of him and he took it with a weak smile.
“It’s that thing I do. But… I don’t know.”
“Seeing the past?” The Doctor asked.
Y/n swallowed. “Seeing the future.” The Doctor’s eyes widened but he didn’t say anything. “It really only manifested as moments the last times it happened. Nothing significant. Sometimes not even something I can make sense of. But this - it’s not even like that. It was always my personal future. Tiny glimpses.” He smiled softly but it crumbled quickly. “This is something darker. I don’t know - it’s like something is trying to get to me. Reaching out. And the closer it gets the more I see something happening seconds ahead of me. Maybe something happening right now, or right now, or now.” He sighed.
Rose rested her cheek on his shoulder. “We’re a long way from home.”
Y/n managed a smile at that. “Oh it’s not too far. What would you say Doctor, 500 years or so?”
The Doctor paused and Y/n registered that calculating expression. The careful placement of his features and the thin line his lips had pressed into. It was a look Y/n knew but had never seen before. The look of someone who was walking a cliff edge. The Doctor didn’t like soldiers, he never had. People who carry guns and get angry and fight fire with fire. Sure they were dangerous and made matters worse more often than not. But… they also remind the Doctor of himself. He needs companions that ground him and pull him from that precipice that threatens to pull him under constantly.
Could Y/n be that for him anymore?
It was a terrifying thought.
And a daunting task.
Y/n looked away as Ida spoke up and opened the roof to show them something. A red streak moving through the sky. What used to be the Scarlet System, getting devoured. It made Rose homesick. She checked her phone and sighed.
“No signal.” She tried to smile and fell short. “We’ve never been out of the TARDIS’ reach before. But, I suppose even if I could. What would I even say to her?” She looked at Y/n as if he could have an answer and got a shrug in response.
“No one knows what would satiate Jackie Tyler. She makes up her own mind about that sort of thing.”
That actually got Rose to smile. “You can’t build another TARDIS can you? Two geniuses like yourselves.”
The Doctor paused, eyes on Y/n. “They weren’t built. They were grown. And with my home planet gone… we’re kind of stuck.”
Rose reached over, taking Y/n’s hand. He rested his cheek on top of her head. “Could be worse,” she tried. “This lot said they’d give us a lift.”
“And then what?” The Doctor was still looking at Y/n when he asked it but his eyes slowly drifted to Rose and stayed there.
She looked back, frowning. “I don’t know. Find a planet. Get a job. Live your life the same as the rest of the universe.”
“The long way around,” Y/n mused.
“I’d have to settle down,” the Doctor pouted. “Get a house or something. A proper house with-“ he stuttered over words for a second. “Doors and things. Carpets. Me, living in a house! Now that… that…” he struggled again and Y/n reached across to take his hand with the one he had free. The Doctor relaxed and eased.
“We can do it together. Figure out how to live something mundane and normal after… all we’ve seen together.” He scoffed and the Doctor and Rose actually laughed.
Rose lifted her head. “Oh god you and I, getting married one day? What do you say?”
Y/n barely contained a grin. “Well I suppose.” His eyes flickered over to the Doctor who suddenly seemed nervous. “Jackie will kill us for getting married without her.” They both laughed.
“Oh, Jackie,” the Doctor sighed. “I promised her I’d always bring you back home.”
Rose raised a hand to fiddle with her earring, eyeing the black hole but not really seeing it. It was just something to look at. “Everyone leaves home in the end.”
The Doctor grew a little more sober. “Not to end up stuck here.”
“Stuck here with you two,” Rose shot back. “That’s not so bad.” She squeezed Y/n’s hand, reaching over with her free hand to take the Doctor’s other as well. She must have squeezed his hand as well because he squeezed Y/n’s and that made him smile.
The Doctor pulled Y/n’s hand to his lips, leaving a kiss on the knuckles. “Marriage. Scary.” Y/n blushed at the implication of this conversation. The fact that they were having it at all. The Do toe seemed so okay with it all. He had been running his entire life… could he stop? Was he even capable of it?
Rose’s phone rang and the trio looked at it at the same time, confusion taking over all their expressions. She raised the phone to her ear.
“Hello?” Nearly the second she said it her face went blank and she chuckled the phone to get it away from her. Y/n and the Doctor both tensed and she turned them with urgency in her eyes. “We need to discuss something. Y/n’s visions - they’re not the in out weird thing. The Ood keep saying weird things, and my call just now- He is awake. That’s what it said.”
The Doctor suddenly got very serious. “Y/n I need to hear every detail of your visions that you can remember. Every single one.”
He told him. Told him about the eyes and the blackness and the red ones too. The inky symbols on his skin and the voice and the breath on the back of his neck. After Rose mentioned the Ood said something in the cafeteria earlier they were on the move.
They asked about the Ood and found there was a telepathic field they all communicated through because they were empathic. Y/n couldn’t focus. That queasy feeling hadn’t ever really left but he had gotten used to it. But now it was getting worse again, pressing against the back of his throat. Words were fading out and he gripped the railing so as not to collapse.
All he could hear was-
“He is awake.” It was Rose’s voice. But he didn’t really seem to care. All his brain could provide him was one response. Words stuck in his throat that needed to get out. That forced their way.
“And you will worship him.” Y/n spoke in sync with the Ood and Rose jumped.
The Doctor looked between Y/n and the Ood and grabbed the railing with both hands.
“He is awake,” the Doctor echoed.
“And you will worship him,” Y/n was forced to say again. Then distant voices, far away again, like warbling in between static in a radio. Nothing at all. And then Y/n felt dizzy and his eyes fluttered and his grip loosened and he heard that scream again. A distant, high pitched woman’s scream. He saw fingers clinging to metal, loosening, and hands disappearing out of view.
Someone had died.
But he couldn’t save her.
He couldn’t even save himself.
He was falling too. Into blackness again. Into that darkness in those eyes. And his time when he fell there was no touch to shake him out of it. He just kept falling. He was suddenly sure he always would be.
-
When Y/n woke up he was covered in sweat. His body temperature was too high; he already knew it. He was on the ground, on his side. Still in the room with the Ood but now he has a pillow under his head. “What happened?”
Someone nervy offered a hand and he took it, letting them help him to his feet. “You passed out. The drill stopped and Ida and the Doctor went down to see about the power source.”
Y/n’s heart stopped. Bad. Very bad. This was not good. “Where’s Rose?”
“Command deck. She- hey! You’re supposed to stay here!”
But Y/n was running. He booked it as fast as he could, opening door after door and barely pausing to close it behind him. He hit the command deck and the door opened just as he saw what he knew he would. Toby, eyes red, those black symbols covering every inch of skin, lips blue. Dead. Something else controlling him.
Everyone jumped when Y/n entered. Toby spun around and locked eyes with him, grinning. “Oh it’s you. My favorite.”
Y/n’s face darkened. “Shut it. You’ll say anything to make me hate myself.”
Toby laughed. Well, his body did at least. That hadn’t been Toby for hours now. “I don’t need to make you do anything. You already do. Do you want to know a secret?” He stepped forward and Y/n held his ground, eyes blazing. Rose reached for him but stopped in her fear. Paused a little too long and didn’t quite touch him. “He hates you too. He sees the corruption in you, and you will lose him as you will lose everyone.”
It wasn’t a speech. It wasn’t a threat. But there was an emptiness to it. This creature couldn’t see the future. But it could see the present, and the comment about the Doctor hating him really could be true. How often did the devil lie? No beating around the bush, no manipulation, no twisting, no half truth. A full lie.
He tried not to think about it.
He didn’t even pause, didn’t even wait. He spun around and hooked his arm around Rose. “Run!” He shouted. Toby groaned and the ink on his skin puffed into smoke in the air. Leaving him clean. And wafting into the Ood, whose eyes turned red. The door had been left open by him and he ushered them all through it. Unfortunately the way Y/n had come was the way toward more Ood and they were stopped by the man who’d woken Y/n earlier.
“Get back!” He yelled. “It’s the Ood! Go the other way!”
So they did the only thing they could do. They went back, and the idiots with guns did the only thing they were good at: they killed the Ood in their way now. Y/n tried to blink the memories away of a different fire. A battle like this. Whatever was amplifying the Doctor’s memories in his mind - this wasn’t the time.
He moved to Rose as she got in contact with the Doctor. “Are you okay?” He asked quietly. The others were yelling at the Ood and some new weapon but Rose was all Y/n cared about now.
She looked at him, recognizing that haunted look in his eyes again. The fear he’d had when her face had been wiped.
She grabbed his hand. “I’m okay, don't worry yourself. Not too much. I need that thinker of yours.” He nodded immediately.
And then he did something a little scary. He turned, kicking Jefferson in the chest. Rose screamed but Jefferson dropped the gun and that was what mattered. Y/n kicked the gun down the hall. It slid past Toby, still on the ground, and out of reach. “What did you do that for?” Jefferson yelled. He was the leader of the soldiers and guards here and Y/n didn’t trust him.
Not just because he’d had a gun.
“You were going to shoot Toby.”
Jefferson blinked. “How did you-?”
Rose looked at Jefferson with fury. “Don’t touch a hair on his head!”
“I don’t follow orders from you,” the old man snapped. “I saw him infected. I saw him bring that thing in here, whatever got to the Ood and messed them up. We all did!”
“What we all saw was that whatever it was, it’s gone,” Rose snapped back. Her voice grew gentler as she approached the man, trying to be as non threatening as possible. Y/n couldn’t do that right now - he was reeling again. “Look at his face, nothing there. It passed into the Ood. He’s clean.”
That wasn’t quite right, Y/n was sure of it. Or maybe he was being paranoid. Either way it didn’t matter. If they could save Toby they had to try - and Jefferson would kill him if he thought he was any kind of threat.
Rose did well.
Jefferson backed off.
As the Doctor and Ida began to get on the capsule to be brought up to the surface, something it took them a second to decide on, the lights flickered and comms were taken over by the Ood. All of then that could, squishing into frame to tell them the Devil was coming after them. That it would kill them all and escape. Telling them things about their past it shouldn’t know. Listed them one by one, with titles and insights about who they were that was… impossible.
It called Y/n ‘the failure who no one can help but trust, who will let them all down when it matters’ and Y/n felt that feeling again. The breath on the back of his neck. And maybe he was pet TARDIS and part Timelord and maybe he was immortal and maybe if he fell into that black hole nothing would happen to him. But it would kill the Doctor and it would kill Rose and he wouldn’t be able to stop it. Nothing else mattered. They would fail. They would die.
The Doctor’s voice cut through the chaos after some feedback got everyone to go silent. The Doctor rallied everyone as he always did. Reminded them they had a chance. Gave them a boost, encouraged them, kept them going. And then the cord that was supposed to pull up the capsule with them inside it snapped and the feedback cut and sure they had life signs but by all intents and purposes, Ida and the Doctor were trapped ten miles below them with no way out and no way to even communicate.
They were gone.
Y/n fell to his knees.
Rose took control. She led everyone as she always could in a pinch. Got everyone organized as she’s learned from the Doctor. No one could deny the authority in her voice - especially when she was completely correct. She used every single person on a taste to complete a plan. They’d travel through the vents to get to Ood habitation and filter a virus that would kill all of them. Zack would filter air as they went by hand. They’d have to be fast and they’d have to stay together. Danny, the man who had been there when Y/n woke up, who usually watched the Ood, made the virus and then they were off. Rose grabbed Y/n’s hand and she gave him a look. Stone hard and cold.
“Promise me you can do this. I need you to move on your own now.”
Rose’s words stung. He hated being a liability. He didn’t know what was wrong with him. He felt useless and stuck. The heat was rising inside him.
But he could do anything for her. “Of course I can. I’m sorry Rose. I didn’t mean to make you doubt me.”
“I never doubt you,” she promised. And that did make him feel better.
They were in the vents as quickly as they could get, but the Ood followed. Jefferson stayed behind to slow them down and they raced as fast as they could to get as far away as possible. But he stayed too long and the door closed and he was left behind. Losing air. And he said his goodbyes. Then he was gone.
Y/n saw it in moments. Flashes. Like a skipping tape. Could feel the heat creeping up again and all he could do was focus on going forward no matter what. Unfortunately when they’re next junction opened the Ood we’re waiting for them and they had to leave the vents and book it on foot. They raced to Ood habitation and Danny input the virus just in time. All the Ood died.
This time Y/n blocked it out. That connection he had, that link he seemed to be tapping into. The part of the TARDIS that connected him to everything around him. He shut it off. The heat stopped and he felt suddenly freezing. His vision focused, his heart beat slowed and his breathing evened. The Ood died and whatever was sinking into Y/n was gone.
They all ran to the comms to try and get to the Doctor and Ida, but they were still down so Zack began to work to try and boost comms to get to them.
Rose looked at Y/n. “You’re looking better. What happened?”
Y/n shook his head. “I don’t know I-“ he felt a deep and profound loss. Something was missing. Something was gone. It terrified him.
But before they could figure it out Zack stepped back and Rose grabbed the comm to try and get to Ida. She yelled for them to report, and they got a voice back.
Ida’s.
“He’s gone,” was all she said at first.
Rose and Y/n locked eyes. “What do you mean he’s gone?” Rose asked. But there was agony in both of their eyes.
“He fell,” Ida answered. And they couldn’t blame her because Rose had asked, but Y/n wanted to. “Into the pit. And I don’t know how deep it is - miles and miles and miles.
Rose blinked, looked away. Tried to hold on to something. There was loss in Y/n’s eyes but she refused to believe it in a million years. He didn’t want her to believe it anyway. The loss he felt wasn’t for the Doctor. Not yet. He wasn’t sure… he couldn’t know if the Doctor was dead or not. Not anymore. Or maybe… maybe the loss was the knowing. Maybe that was the thing he didn’t have. It made his heart sink.
“What do you mean he fell?” Rose asked.
“I couldn’t stop him,” Ida answered and it made Y/n’s eyes water. Of course she couldn’t. No one could have. “He said your name, Rose.”
Rose didn’t respond. She handed the comm to Zack and he talked to Ida as Rose looked at Y/n. “We can’t leave him,” she whispered.
Y/n stared at her with wide eyes. “Rose I… no. We can’t stay here. We’ll die.”
“We won’t. He’ll be back,” she insisted. “You know the Doctor will be back Y/n.”
“No.” Y/n shook his head but Rose had that look in her eyes again. The unstoppable look. Like nothing would convince her or change her mind. And Y/n knew it wouldn’t.
“What’s the matter?” Zack asked as he turned from the comms.
Y/n shot him a very meaningful glance. “She wants to stay on the planet.”
“I want to wait for him,” Rose insisted. “He’ll come back and I have to be here. We have to be here!”
Zack stared at her with pity. “I’m sorry but… he’s dead.”
Rose shook her head. “You don’t know him like we do. Y/n, tell him.”
But Y/n couldn’t help her this time. “I do know him Rose, you’re right. And I know he’s probably not dead. But I also know he can’t get to us. I also know he’d be furious if we stayed. I know that no matter where we go he’ll find us if he can. We don’t have to wait here, no matter where we are, he’ll find us. And staying here won’t help, we'll just get in the way. He’ll pull some miracle and he’ll come back but we have to trust him alright? We have to trust that he’ll find us when we leave, and we have to take care of ourselves and each other in the meantime.” He grabbed her hand. “Please.”
Rose hesitated too long. Y/n thought she was going to argue again. But then she just met his gaze. “Promise me he’ll come back. Promise me he’s alive and has a plan. With your thing, your connection. Tell me he’s okay.”
Y/n did something perhaps quite cruel.
He lied.
“I promise. I have all the Doctor’s brain up here-“ he tapped his forehead. “And he’s figuring it out right now. He’s facing it no problem and he needs us to be safe so he can be the hero again. You know him.” He offered his hand and she paused a second longer but then nodded and took it.
She could hate him later. He would tell her when they were safe. When she couldn’t get hurt or put her life on the line meaninglessly.
They all made their way to the rocket as fast as they could. Buckled in as Zack began to work as quickly as he could to get them to lift off. They were gone as quickly as they could, Y/n reaching over to take Rose’s hand when she looked out the window to watch the planet disappear from view. Somewhere in the middle of it she looked away, toward Y/n. “It doesn’t make sense.”
Y/n frowned. “What doesn’t?”
“We escaped. But if it just wanted to kill us, I mean, it could have in a bunch of different ways. Ripped the whole thing apart, skipped the monologue and just started killing. But it didn’t. It’s like it let us go.”
Toby suddenly turned to Rose before Y/n could respond. “Rose, would you do us a favor? Shut up.” His words were so harsh and so sudden and violent. Rose looked at Y/n and he nodded. That was when the gravity field collapsed. They began falling into the black hole. Toby screamed something and Y/n watched with wide eyes as Rose grabbed the bolt shooter and took aim at the window and pulled the trigger. The glass exploded and everyone screamed as the vacuum of space pulled against them. Rose unbuckled Toby. He was pale again, eyes red and symbols back across his skin.
Zack threw up the shields and they stopped suffocating. Y/n wasn’t much aware. He was seeing things again.
The vision started with glimpses like they usually did. A woman with red hair, then two, both ruffling Y/n’s hair and laughing at something he’d said, but at very different times. A man with dark skin as he rolled his eyes at an older white man and a blonde woman next to them in a long, gray coat that was awkwardly looking between them. Another old man, but this one much grumpier than the last one. A few of him actually. Mostly of him scowling until his eyes landed on Y/n, and then softening. Sometimes the old man was with a brunette woman with a sly, teasing smile hidden behind her hand, and sometimes he was with a black woman who laughed loudly and openly teased the old man for looking at Y/n the way he did. There was another woman too, with brown hair that curled even though she often wore it tied on top of her head. She glared at Y/n, sneering even as she made jokes that Y/n seemed to genuinely laugh at - which only seemed to irritate the woman more.
The visions seemed to catch the second they hit the man with the bow tie again. They stopped and slowed. Not flashes, but moments. He was dancing with Y/n. He was running and gripping Y/n’s hand. He was blubbering about being kissed by someone named Amy, and the drama of it all and how he really didn’t mean it while Y/n laughed. He was wearing an odd hat Y/n had never seen before, but it got ripped off his head and thrown in the air and a shot rang out through the air.
Y/n spun around to see another woman. She had curly blonde hair and a smirk across her lips. Her eyes were bright and shining and when she saw Y/n looking at her there was something distinctly flirty about it. It was confusing. It was easy to tell the Doctor apart from companions. Even the blonde woman with the bob - the anxious one who had been looking between the two arguing men - Y/n knew she was the Doctor too. Companions had such a distinct energy…
This woman wasn’t the Doctor. She carried a gun and there was a dangerous edge to her that Y/n knew the Doctor was capable of but would never display as proudly as this woman was. And yet… there was something about her. She wasn’t a companion. Y/n would say the Master if that were possible but she couldn’t be. She had such a similar energy to the woman with dark curly hair that pinned it up, but the irritation that woman had displayed toward Y/n wasn’t there. And she made Y/n feel very different things.
The next few visions were all of her. Most of them she had that smirk on her face, and some of them she was kissing Y/n. And some of them she was kissing the Doctor - the man on the bow tie.
So definitely not the Master then.
None of them told him how they all fell in love, and it shook him that Rose was nowhere in sight, but it was clear that something had happened and she was gone. And this woman…
“River,” Y/n sighed. “You need to get up.” Y/n felt his heart drop into his toes as the woman curled next to him groaned.
“I want more time.” She reached up, pressing a kiss to Y/n’s forehead.
Y/n chuckled. “You definitely have time. To serve. As the law requires.” The words were coming out of his mouth and the vision was so clear he could feel his heart fluttering and the smile across his face but that didn’t mean any of it made sense.
“It’s so unfair,” River complained. She turned and swung a leg over Y/n to settle on his stomach, leaning down to brush her fingers across his skin. “I only killed the man a little bit. Can’t I enjoy my time with the loves of my life?”
Y/n laughed but his stomach plummeted into his toes. Not his stomach in the vision - that was still fluttering with butterflies, his skin tingling at her touch. Which made even less sense! This woman had killed someone? She was in jail? Had he broken her out? Had she broken herself out just to be here with him? Why would he be with someone like that?
“I'm sure the Doctor will forgive you,” Y/n sighed with love in his voice. But Y/n felt his heart stop in his chest. The implication was clear. This woman had killed the Doctor. How could Y/n love her? All the context was missing. He didn’t understand!
The scene changed and he was looking at his Doctor again. The blue suit and sneakers and spikey hair was all there, but there was a new darkness too. A hollowness. He was older and had lost more. Y/n reached up exactly as he wanted to, running his hands through the man’s hair. The Doctor melted under the touch, his head falling on Y/n’s shoulder. “I missed you.”
Y/n felt his heart ache. “I know,” he responded. He swallowed. The him that was seeing this and the him that was experiencing the moment were completely in sync. So much so that it was hard to hold onto as a vision and it was just a day Y/n was living.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
Y/n sighed. He cupped the Doctor’s face, lifting him by the chin to bring their eyes together. “I lost her too. I know how it felt. I know… how it must have felt. To realize I knew the whole time. I can imagine, I mean.”
He shook his head, his eyes watering. “Y/n it wasn’t your fault. You do so much for me and I turned my back on you. It’s only because Donna-“
“It doesn’t matter,” Y/n rushed. “I need you to hear me, Doctor. You’re going to mess up. So am I. And I already forgive you. I have forgiven you a hundred times over because I love you and I know what I am getting myself into every single time I choose you. And I will keep choosing you forever. Do you understand me? I love you.”
The Doctor melted, his eyes softening and some of that light coming back again. “What will I do when I keep losing them?” He sighed. “How do you manage it, knowing how they go?”
Y/n thought over that for a moment. “Honestly, I can’t make decisions for you or anyone. All of them will do as they see fit. And you need them. And I need them. And they need us. Especially you.” He left a kiss on the Doctor’s nose and he smiled ever so softly. “And there are more friends around the corner. Family. And you lose them too, but… the moments you get to have them at all are worth it I think.” He brushed his thumb across the Doctor's cheek. “Does that make sense?”
The Doctor nodded. “A bit.”
Y/n smiled. “Come on. Bed time. You need your sleep.”
Sliding off of the counter he was sitting on, the Doctor rolled his eyes but didn’t resist as Y/n pulled him along. “Alright mum,” he said sarcastically. Y/n laughed and the sound echoed and the TARDIS itself seemed to get a little brighter and the Doctor’s smile grew. They would be okay. They’d figure it all out eventually.
When Y/n woke up he was on the TARDIS. He ran his hands through his hair and sat up, wiping his eyes. Something was off. He slid out of bed and headed into the control room.
The wrong control room.
No wait. This was his control room. Why did he expect a different one? He raised a hand to rub his temples just as the front doors of the TARDIS opened to the sound of laughter. Y/n’s eyes snapped up, wide.
Rose.
Why was he so surprised to see Rose?
At some point in his visions, it seemed the future him had gotten muddled with the current him. And the future him was stunned to see this past version of life, with this TARDIS and this Rose.
Rose and the Doctor froze when they turned and saw Y/n. The Doctor was the first to break. He was across the room in a second, hands on Y/n’s jaw so he could maneuver his face as he checked his eyes. “I told you to keep him in his room until we got back,” he grumbled, and Y/n smiled as he realized the man was talking to the TARDIS.
The Doctor was so young… exactly as he had been for as long as Y/n had known him. It was a weird balance, the haunted man he’d seen in the future and the haunted man he saw now.
Rose was there only a second later, frowning with concern. “Y/n are you okay?”
Y/n stared at her too long. Maybe that’s why she had asked. But he just smiled wider and nodded. “I’m okay. Have I been out long?”
The Doctor had that look he always did when he was deeply displeased by something. “Four days.” He was worried and that was making him protective. Defensive even. Like he was ready for an argument.
Maybe Y/n would have argued before. He couldn’t remember, it felt ages away. All he could see now was that fragile man with the ancient eyes that were so tired. Even more than his Doctor. You couldn’t argue too much with that man, he might actually get upset. You had to count your losses where you could and be cleverer about the things that mattered. “I’m sorry you must have been so worried about me.”
“Worried?” Rose scoffed. “Y/n we were out of our minds. What happened back on the Bitter Pill?”
Y/n opened his mouth but then closed it. He looked at the Doctor and worked his jaw. “Whatever creature we faced was messing with everything attached to the psychic field. I think I found myself attached to it at some point. That’s probably how I’ve been so connected to everything since the beginning. Some very weak psychic abilities. Latent. My good instinct that leads us places, my intense empathic ability, how I even connected to all the Cybermen who died in the other universe.” He shrugged. “I turned it off.”
The Doctor’s eyes widened. “You what?”
Y/n rubbed the back of his neck. “Sorry, it’s confusing for me too. I don’t know if it’ll come back or what’s going on with me. I’m as confused as you are honestly.”
Rose pursed her lips. “Well. You kept passing out, and the way you connected to all that - it was terrifying. We couldn’t drag you around everywhere, if it had gotten really bad… I don’t know it-“
“You shouldn’t come traveling with us for a while,” the Doctor stated bluntly. “We need to see how this is affecting you a bit more long term before we risk your life again. Even if you don’t die, I will not lose you. Do you understand?”
Y/n nodded. “That makes sense. I’ll keep an eye over the TARDIS for a while.”
That surprised the Doctor. “I-“ He paused, trying to filter through that. “Y/n. May I scan your mind?” Y/n smiled and nodded, knowing the Doctor was being paranoid but also that he had every right to be. So Y/n sat and let the Doctor run all his tests. He even let the Doctor scan through his mind, tucking away the visions he’d seen when he was unconscious.
“Y/n,” the Doctor began. “You need to show me everything I need to make sure you’re okay.”
Y/n chuckled. “No I don’t. They’re visions of the future, Doctor. Spoilers.”
They were looking at each other, eyes open, so they could both see the other reacting to this situation. The patience Y/n had while waiting for the Doctor to accept that they both knew he had to drop it even as he fought it.
Finally the Doctor sighed. “Fine.” He leaned back. “What you saw changed you.” Y/n didn’t lie - he nodded. The Doctor frowned. “Should I be worried?”
“You’ll always be worried. But you’re right - I can’t be in the way. I may be immortal but you two are not. So go on your little adventures and I’ll rest. I need some time to myself anyway. It’s been a lot since this whole thing happened and I really haven’t had time to process it. So-“ he shrugged.
Rose hummed. “Let’s eat something. We can tell you what you missed.” Y/n got excited and hopped up, racing to the kitchen. Rose and the Do tor exchanged looks. There was something off about Y/n but perhaps some things would stay the same if he always got this excited for food. Everything else they could figure out later. For now they had stories to tell.
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ladylooch · 1 year ago
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I’ll paint the scene for tonight! The Devils are playing but Captain Nico isn’t and he isn’t traveling to Long Island to see the guys, however, he is inviting some of the guys over (or not) but he is watching the game because he feels that is his duty as captain to watch and support everyone. But you have been missing the captain, as you went from spending every day together to him having daily training sessions and actual games, and you’re in the mood! But he refuses to pay attention because of the guys and his “commitment” and you do what every petty girlie would and tease the fuck out of him… 😂😂 you can continue I just enjoy imagining Nico sweating for it!
Ohhh captan Nico… always focused on his captain duties and not on you. When will he learns? Maybe tonight 😈
Twice.
That’s how many times you and Nico have had sex since he returned from Switzerland. You had gone to visit for 6 weeks during the summer, but eventually had to return home to your job. As much as Nico begs you to quit, you’re not comfortable relying on him for your survival… yet.
Nico sits on the couch with an iPad, making little notes every so often as his team plays without him. He is perfectly healthy, but they wanted to give rest to the NHL roster for the last pre-season game against the Isles. 
You thought, this would mean you were going to get lucky, completely forgetting about the burning responsibility Nico feels for his team, whether he is on the ice or not.
Annoyed with his lack of attention, you clear your throat from where you stand in the hallway.
“Hm?” Nico mumbles without looking at you. Your lingerie is too damn sexy for him to be so disrespectful. 
“Babe.” You murmur, looking down at your plumped breasts then back to his face. He begrudgingly takes his eyes from the screens. His mouth drops open when he sees all the peeks of your skin between the garters and silk. 
“Holy shit.” He moans, licking his lips and tossing his iPad. You slowly step forward. You drag your fingers along the swells of your cleavage until his focus is completely off the game. He reaches for your hips as you come to straddle him. His hands immediately go to your ass. His long fingers pull your cheeks apart, working his hard erection against your folds. 
“They score!!!!!” The announce booms behind you. Nico’s eyes drift around your body. You grip his chin, bringing his brown gaze to yours and making him absorb your tongue.
“You look at that game again, I’m walking outside like this to see if there are any other takers.”
“Babe.” He whines, melting into the couch as you rock your hips.
“The boys…”
“Aren’t going to choke on your dick tonight.” His eyes sparkle, slight smirk tugging a corner of his lips up.  
“No, they aren’t.” He agrees, nostrils wide as he watches you crawl, one leg at a time, to rest between his spread thighs.
You look at his straining erection, biting your lip, then giggling at how desperate he looks when your fingers work the waistband down. His firm cock pops out. You lean forward, letting your hardened nipples trace along his thighs. His breathing stutters. Your tongue traces his plumped head. 
Suddenly, the New Jersey Devils captain doesn’t remember his team is playing an hour and a half away.
Instead, his focus is on your soft mouth stroking his rock hard length.
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silentwhispofhope · 2 years ago
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*Limping to your request box* I MISSED YOU AND I WANT TO GIVE YOU AN IDEA FILLED WITH FLUFF!! Is it okay to request?
💞[Skin Writing/Drawing Soulmate AU]✍️ 🖌️ - Reader is an artist and constantly draws many art in their skin because it's just so satisfying! Their soulmate Vash feels appreciated, in love, and beautiful whenever Reader's drawing appear on his skin. Their art just gives him a reason to love his skin despite skin scars 🥺 🖋️ - Reader does calligraphy, and they sometimes quote the bible doing it cause why not? Soulmate Wolfwood just looks with a soft, maybe teasing smile as he sees his soulmate's work. 😎 📜 - Reader is a poet and they randomly have ideas and prompt all throughout the day, so they grab a pen and start writing all the poetry from their head. Soulmate Knives who's intellectual and curious admires whenever his soulmate's writing appear on his skin, he just covers it from others eyes because pest don't deserve to see this beauty. 🌱
YOU CAN PICK TWO OUT OF THE THREE!! IT'S YOUR CHOICE MY FRIEND!!! 😍💝💌
- Sugar Plum Anon 💟
A/N: Just for you Sugar Plum Anon, I’ll do all three <3 I do hope you’re alright though! Please do stay safe! Since I’m doing all three, I hope you’re alright with headcanons instead of normal lil’ one shots. :)
Skin Writing/Drawing Soulmate AU Headcanons
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Vash
He was absolutely scared out of his mind when he first saw the ink appear on his skin. He even went as far as to try to scrub his skin raw, and the ink was still fresh as ever. Poor blondie is wondering how the hell something like this is happening.
Meanwhile, you’re doodling like there’s no tomorrow with your ballpoint pen, tracing the outlines of your veins and doodling smiling faces.
Over time, Vash learns to just accept the random appearance and disappearance of drawings across his body. At the end of the day, it’s like a fun little game to see what’s been sketched on him underneath his turtle neck.
It takes a while for Vash to realize that it’s his soulmate doodles appearing on his skin. Warmth floods his heart each time he thinks of this, causing him to lovely trace the marks across his own skin.
He would laugh sometimes at the sudden ink smear appearing on his skin before new sketch marks appeared, your work hypnotizing him. He especially loved when you used different colors, almost painting his skin like a canvas. Eventually, he makes the move to respond.
So imagine your surprise when you find a poorly drawn flower appear on your skin. Ensue the same panic Vash experienced when you remembered you didn’t draw that.
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Wolfwood
Scrubbing his skin did nothing. Seeing the scripture on his forearm made him wonder if he had perhaps gotten too drunk the night before and had gotten a tattoo.
The fancy calligraphy was choice, especially with that proverb. For the lips of the adulterous woman drop honey, and her speech is smoother than oil. Wolfwood decided that there could be worse things etched into his skin from that old religion.
You, on the other hand, were giggling to yourself. Oh, the irony of something appearing to beautiful but naughty. A snort escapes from one of your nearby friends.
He didn’t put anymore thought into it until the next day when the ink disappeared. Lowkey, thought he was super dehydrated for him to imagine that, but nope, even after drinking tons of water, the ink was no longer on his skin.
Cue some praying. He nearly has a heart attack when more ink appears on his skin. He has to go back to the orphanage and ask the elders for help on understanding the situation. Turns out it’s a soulmate thing, one which they didn’t even bother to mention until now.
Overtime, he appreciates the calligraphy he appears on his skin, particularly when new motifs appear. Wolfwood liked seeing you test new things and watch as the ink appear on his skin.
However, he was very glad to wear long sleeves when you would write down a particularly dirty proverb like 5:19. He would always end up blushing a bright red like a tomato, a huge contrast to his normal, stoic personality.
Imagine, your surprise when you notice fresh ink on your skin. For your ways are in the full view of the LORD in basic script.
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Knives
He almost didn’t see the script appear on his arms, the ink nearly blending into his suit and pale skin. His fingers traced the letters he could make out. Knives immediately knew what this meant, it was his soulmate reaching out- most likely not knowing what was happening.
He tried to ignore it the best he could and kept himself covered with his cloak. Having someone would just drag him down, make it harder to reach his goal of eradicating humanity. However, his curiosity got the best of him.
Taking another look, the bleach blond quickly recognized the letters as chords with their denoted accidentals. Luckily for him, he new how to play. It was child’s play, really.
Meanwhile, your trying to understand how to play different songs only by listening too them. You were too stubborn to look them up, very confident in your ability.
And so it became a pattern for him to decipher your song you had written on his arm. He would spend hours playing the piano, watching the notes on his arm be crossed out and replaced. The composition rarely stayed imprinted on his skin for longer than a day.
Often, Knives would see lyrics being written with the chords. A little artist are we now? His small joke to himself caused a small smile. He would end up humming them, his low voice cutting through the air. It was for the sake of rhythm, he told himself.
Imagine your surprise when you saw a new. mark you knew you hadn’t inscribed into your skin, a word marked out for another.
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oddballwriter · 1 year ago
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HEYAA. I’ve been so obsessed with ur MK stuff lately it’s insane. Wondering if I could request a little blurb with Steven? 🙏 Maybe artistic reader who uses Steven as a muse of sorts? 🎨 Maybe Steven finds reader’s sketches of him and Reader is like embarrassed 😨 that he may be uncomfortable with it? Add and change up anything you’d like!! 😽 ur my fav writer thank you 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼❤️❤️
Your Drawings Look like Heaven to Me
꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦
Summary: Steven always enjoys your drawings and art, big or small, painting or simple sketch and doodle. But he's a bit surprised when he discovers that you have a habit of drawing a certain muse that you have. 
Warnings: There's nothing that I can actually thing of other than it's mentioned that the reader draws Steven when he's unaware, but I don't think it's that bad. Also 'Y/n' is used once. 
Author’s Snip: This was meant to be just a little blurb but I got the writing equivalent of zoomies. You asked for a cookie and I made you a cake with layers, frosting, and toppings. This is insane how did I do this. I think it's because I've been drinking a monster while writing this. I have paused the video that I was previously watching in the background because I am so focused. I'm not even joking this shit is 1517 words long and that is before I proof and grammar checked it. I think this might be the longest writing I've done thus far. Enjoy your free cake, anon.
Notes: This is written in the lens of a world where it's just Steven, so none of the actual events in the show happen.
I’ll shut up now. Enjoy! And don’t be afraid to request.
꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦
Steven always knew you drew. You met at your jobs at the museum, at the time, you were working the front desk while he of course worked at the gift shop. The two of you weren't all too familiar with each other since you only saw each other in passing. You knew him as Steven from the gift shop, and he knew you as Y/N from the front desk. You did learn more details through others. Steven was a chatty guy who had an impressive knowledge about Egyptology and mythos. And you were the person at the front desk who did nothing but sit there and draw all day when not granting visitors entry, or in most cases, taking a second to scan a preprinted ticket and check the schedule.
Steven heard talk that you were really talented in your art. You were able to draw what were basically pictures of things you saw or even made up. He hadn't seen your actual art till one day he found you sat where he usually did for lunch, drawing the statue man that he talked at everyday. And wow, were they right about how well you could draw. Though while you talked to each other you laughed "Well of course I'm able to draw him perfectly. He doesn't move.".
That lunch break was a long time ago. You two started dating between then and now. Steven managed to leave the museum for a new one that actually let him be a tour guide. You eventually managed to find work that let you use your skills in art instead of using it to beat the boredom of your job. And you also moved in with Steven in his little flat, in which he cleared out some of this clutter to make a space for you to work and make your own.
You would draw little doodles for Steven to have. Like Gus swimming around. An Egyptian god that you made using his books as a reference. You even drew him a little alligator with a speech bubble saying "Later" on a sticky note. He still has it by the way. He laminated it using clear tape and has it in his wallet as a pick-me-up when he's upset or as a lucky charm of sorts. You always made drawings for him. But never once had he thought that you would make drawings of him. Let alone how many drawing you made of him.
Steven isn't a man who likes to snoop around regularly, feeling a massive sense of ruining someone's privacy. But you said that he could always look through your sketchbooks and art pieces if he wanted, as long as it wasn't a commission that was still being worked on, which he respected. You, like any other artist, had a plethora of sketchbooks of different sizes that served different purposes. There were your personal sketchbooks, outline and testing sketchbooks, practice sketchbooks, a lot of sketchbooks with a lot of different things they were for. It amazed him just how many you had and how you were able to remember which is which.
He knew which ones were ones he gifted you though. Steven was never confident when it came to gifting you supplies. He wasn't an artist himself so he didn't know what was perfect and what was something you would say thank you for out of courtesy. One of the things he used as a safe play were sketchbooks. The bookstore he frequented had a section of art stuff and found that the sketchbooks were not only great quality but also had various designs on their covers. So he'd get you one almost every time he went.
When he looked at them on the shelf next to your desk he realized that he had never actually seen inside of those ones. He was a bit hesitant to grab one since he didn't know if you would want him to. It's not like he could ask you right now. You were out running some important errands and he didn't want to bother you. However, they were on the part of the shelf that you put all your regular personal sketchbooks, which he was allowed to look at so he took a one random from the collection and flicked through the pages.
Out of some coincidence, it was the first sketchbook he got you, which was admittedly one he got you before he learned what pages were good for actual art. The first few pages were doodles that were likely from testing how the paper held up with the actual process of drawing which soon stopped and the rest of the art was actually taped on like they originally belonged to another sketchbook.
Steven thought of that as a clever use for the pages. You would sometimes make art you thought was nice on miscellaneous papers and would simply take the piece with the art out and stick it somewhere else. But he soon notices a theme amongst all the doodles and drawings, which then follow into all of the other sketchbooks he gifted you.
Him.
Most of the drawings in these sketchbooks were of him.
They were all different. Some were him lounging around or taking a nap. Something that would have made him unaware of you creating a drawing of him. There was one that was him asleep laying in bed from what would be your side of the bed. His face was calm, the limpness of his arms and body was captured perfectly, the sheets drawn with the most accurate wrinkles, and the lighting gave the impression of the light of the morning that came in through the curtains. It looked like you simply took a picture of him while he slept but it was clearly a sketch drawn using a pen and pencil.
There was these bust and face portraits that spanned through out the books, of course of him. The first were already so good in detail considering these had to be drawings of him from memory. But they only got more detailed as they went on. You managed to get his amount of stubble right. You had the little baby curls that lived along his hair line. The crease between his eyebrows he had since he always had a slight anxious expression. That tiny little dimple that he had next to his nose that he didn't know existed until you pointed it out one time.
Steven's mind was boggling to him to see such detailed drawings of him that looked so carefully done even when they were simply quick sketches. They were life-like. They were him. They were Steven. To be honest, how could it not? You see his face all the time. So why wouldn't you have him completely memorized. It was just the fact that you had taken time and pages to draw him and him alone.
It was a bit jarring, for the both of you, when you walked through the front door with a hand full of groceries and other things from your errands and he was seen looking at all the drawings of him. You were embarrassed that he finally saw all your drawings of him and worried that he would think it was weird. He thought that he crossed a line and breached your privacy.
You two avoided talking about it till Steven finally did during dinner later that evening.
"You, uh, draw me... a lot." Steven spoke. "Yeah. I do." you blush as you avoided eye contact in case his eyes showed that your fear of him finding your habit with drawing him was strange was correct. "Why do you draw me so much?" he questions. You sighed, "It's sort of a habit I formed." you confess. You proceeded to explain how it started,
"I first drew you as an exercise to get rid of some art block. I usually draw faces of people I know as a means to do that. So I drew you. It was okay. But when I looked at it a couple days later I thought that I could do it again to improve on detailing some more. Then I used you as a study for lighting and colors.".
"Then, sometimes, I would just draw you when I thought you looked pretty or thought of you. And that's sort of what I've been doing." you explain further. "I thought you would find it weird if you saw all the times I drew you and so I just put them in the books you got me and hoped you wouldn't see them." you say in a timid manner.
"I don't think it's strange. I think it's actually quite flattering." Steven clarifies. "I was just surprised that you think of me as something worth drawing. Especially with such detail." he remarks. You breathe a sigh of relief at that.
"If I'm entirely honest, love," Steven spoke up, "Never tell me that you're drawing me from where I am. I'll get nervous and possibly ruin the position that you're drawing me in." he remarks.
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