#I’ll be sad again tomorrow night
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nostalgicria · 1 year ago
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Sorry I was a little sad girl, yall.
Wasn’t very girlboss, ice heart, roster the length of a CVS receipt, killa B of me.
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darkbluekies · 5 months ago
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In the hands of a madman 2024 ver
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Doctor!yandere oc x reader
Summary: a doctor is very peculiar about his favorite patient, and senses a threat once they disobey him.
Warnings: yandere, poison, murder, cuff restraints
Word count: 2.4k
You gag.
“Yes, yes, I know”, he coos, grimacing and removes the wooden stick out of your mouth. “I’m sorry.”
You're left with a bitter taste in your mouth. Why does he always stick that thing as far down your throat as humanly possible? You thank heavens that it’s not one of the needles extracting blood from your arm, although you’re sure that’s what’s waiting tomorrow.
“Still nothing?” you ask cautiously. 
He meets your eyes and you know immediately. You sigh heavily. Your heart sinks to your stomach. 
Every three months, he’s doing all sorts of tests to see if you’re getting better — or what’s what he’s saying. Every three months, Dr Kry has to check every vital sign on you to make sure that his sickness isn’t getting out of his control. But you don’t like them. They hurt. Badly.
“Will I ever get to go home? I want to.” 
Dr Kry sighs and sits down on his rolling stool, coming over to your bed.
“I know you do, but you that’s not possible”, he says apologetically. “You know that too.”
“Yeah, because you keep reminding me”, you mutter. 
“That’s better than giving you false hope, isn’t it? Wouldn’t that drive you insane?”
It would, but you don’t say it out loud. Doesn’t need to.
“I want to go home!” you say again, louder this time. 
“Saying it louder won’t make you better or me change my mind”, Dr Kry says. 
You sigh and press your palms to your eyes, trying to press the tears back into your eyes before they escape. You’ve been here for too long by now. You’ve been isolated for so incredibly long. ALl you want is to go home. You know no one, talk to no one beside him. The proper, sophisticated man who’s stiffer than a stick. Dr Kry sighs and moves closer. 
“I know that you’re disappointed”, he says and puts his large hand on your shoulder. “But this is for the best. “I don’t want you to get worse.”
“I hate these fucking tests! They hurt.”
“I know.”
He glances towards the white air purifier on the shelf beside the bed. The poisoned air purifier. He’s always making sure it’s not too much, not too little. Just the exact amount to keep you where he wants you — weak and vulnerable, dependent on him. 
“I know it’s hard”, he says encouragingly. “I know that you’re in pain, but you’re doing so good. You can always call for me if you need me, okay? I’m available all day and night for you.”
You press forward a smile, but can’t help but feel a wave of sadness wash over you. Why did this happen to you? Where did you go wrong to end up here? How could a sore throat get you bed bound in a hospital room? If only you knew. 
“Let’s get you tucked in again”, Dr Kry says and helps you lie down in bed. “You shouldn’t be putting to much pressure on your body.”
He pushes up your pillows, having you lie in a 45-degree angle. It helps you breathe at night. He always tucks the blanket close to your body, as if you were a butterfly in a cocoon. He gives you a small smile before standing up. 
“Please don’t go”, you whisper. “I don’t want to be left here.”
The man looks at you, studies you carefully before nodding and sitting back down. He wipes your lonely tear with his finger. He looks at his wet finger, thinking. 
“I feel helpless”, you admit. “I don’t think I’ll ever get well again.”
Little do you know that’s exactly what he wants. 
“It’s okay, Y/N”, he says. “I will take care of you. I will stay with you until you’re well again.”
He has to force back a smile. 
“I don’t want to do these anymore”, you say monotonously. 
“I know you don’t, but you have to”, Dr Kry says apologetically and moves closer to the bed on his rolling stool. “They’re important.”
“They hurt …”
“I know, but you’re doing so good, okay? I’m so proud of you.”
You give him a small, painful smile. 
“I’ll sit here until you fall asleep, don’t worry”, he says. “I’m not going anywhere.”
You close your eyes slowly. He fades out. 
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He takes blood tests the following day. Needles, pain.
“Now, you need to take a nap”, he says and tucks you in. 
The daily afternoon nap. You hate it, but he insists. While you sleep, he’s out taking care of other patients that are not you. He hates it, hates wasting his time and skill on people that aren’t you. Those patients are one time patients that are there for surgeries, consultations or checkups. No long term patients that have to stay in the hospital. Everyone gets to leave after he meets them. Everyone but you. You stay. 
You keep your eyes closed until Dr Kry leaves the room. Quickly, you sit up and get out of bed. After all these fucking tests, you’re deserving of something else than the tasteless cardboard Dr Kry gets you. Just one brownie. Something that has sugar. And maybe some coffee for caffeine too. 
Quietly, you sneak out into the corridor. There’s something about these sterile passageways that makes the hair on your back stand on its end. Is it the dehumanized area or the fact that you’re never allowed here? Is it nerves or excitement? Whatever it is, you decide to speed up your steps and hurry towards the elevators before anyone sees you. They’ll tell him. Just as the doors are about to close, someone stops the doors. A boy dressed in a similar hospital gown as yourself forces his way into the elevator. He gives you a rushed, apologetic smile. 
“Sorry”, he says sheepishly. “I am in a hurry.”
“What happened to you?” you ask and smile halfly. 
“I escaped from the therapist. A real pain in my ass.”
You can’t help but giggle. The young man licks his lips and runs a hand through his hair. 
“Have you met her?” he asks. “The therapist?”
“No”, you say. 
You haven’t met anyone but your stiff and proper doctor. 
“Don’t”, the young man advices you and leans his back against the wall. “She’s mental. I honestly think she should be the one getting interrogated — not me.” He looks at you, eyes narrowing. “I haven’t seen you before.”
“Do you meet others?” you ask. 
“In the lounge. Have you been there?”
You shake your head and lower your eyes. 
“Did you just arrive?” the man asks. 
You shake your head again. 
“How long have you been here?”
“A while.”
The elevator stops and the doors open at your floor. 
“Are you going to the cafeteria?” the man asks. 
“Yes”, you reply. 
“I’m coming with you. Maybe you can help me blend in.”
“Okay.”
The boy seems frantic, but happy. Running on adrenaline and excitement. Together, you walk through the hospital to the cafeteria and realize that you don’t have any money. Your shoulders fall. Did you come here for nothing? 
“Aren’t you going to order something?” the young man asks. 
“I don’t know”, you reply quietly. 
Before you have the time to come up with a lie why you can’t order anything, you recognise something in the corner of your eye. A blonde man dressed in a white robe. You feel your blood run cold. 
“What do we have here?” Dr Kry asks and you have a hard time reading his tone or facial expressions. “What do you think you are doing out of bed?”
He walks over to you and grabs your shoulder. You flinch. His grip is … tight. Painful. 
“You’re supposed to rest”, Dr Kry says shortly.
He looks at the young man. His eyes seem to go right through him. 
“Where are you supposed to be?” he asks. 
He doesn’t answer. Dr Kry gives him a cold gaze before grabbing your upper arm in a tight grip. He doesn’t say anything as he starts to pull you with him. His steps are quick, steady. Angry. 
“Doctor …”, you try.
He doesn’t answer. Dr Kry pushes you into the elevator and presses the button. He doesn't let go of your arm.
“Doctor, I’m sorry”, you say. 
He still doesn’t answer. You barely dare to look at him. There’s something about his face that scares you. It's stoic, unreadable. But he oozes anger. Like a dark cloud.
The elevator stops, the doors open. His tight grip remains as he drags you back into your room.
“Lay down”, he instructs shortly.
You do, too scared to disobey. Dr Kry walks past you, to the drawers by your bed. He rips out two leather bands that look like belts for dolls. Before you're aware of what he's doing, he's strapped one of your wrists to the bed railing.
“Wait, doctor-”, you blurt out.
“Be quiet.”
He locks your other wrist to the other railing. You tug at the restraints, and find them secure.
“Are they too tight?” Dr Kry asks, still with that short tone that sends icy needles down your spine.
“Doctor, what are you-?”
“Answer the question. Do they hurt?”
“No.”
“Good.”
He turns to his desk, ignoring you.
“Doctor, I'm sorry”, you say.
“You broke my trust”, he says without giving you any attention. “It's important, for your healing, that you do not deceive me. I need to be able to trust that you do as I say. How many times have you done this?”
“Only this time, I promise.”
He doesn't answer. You feel how your eyes fill with tears. Your body is in such a vulnerable state that your body betrays you. You didn't want to upset him, didn't want to put your own health at risk by doing this. 
“I'm sorry, doctor”, you sniffle. “I didn't mean to break your trust.”
He sighs and turns his head to look at you. His blue eyes soften and he rises from his chair, coming over to your bed. He can't stay mad at you, not when you're clearly dumb. You don't understand, he can't be mad at you for not understanding. He should — and is — mad at himself for not foreseeing these situations and making sure you don't do it.
“You know that I only want what's best for you, don't you?” he asks and wipes your tears with his hand.
“Yes”, you reply.
“In that case, I want you to never repeat this mistake. Mistakes are forgivable, but they should be minimized, do you understand that?”
“Yes. Do you forgive me?”
He has to force back a smile. You're so unbelievably cute.
“Yes, I do forgive you”, he says. 
“Can you take off the restraints?”
“No. I might forgive you, but I need you to know what happens once mistakes occur. This is the consequences that follow. If I can't trust you to be where I want you to be, I need to take precautions to make sure you are.”
You lower your gaze.
“Who was that, by the way?” he asks. “That young … man. Why did you speak to him?”
“I don't know, he took the same elevator as me.”
“I don't want you to speak with him again. If he's the one they're looking for, I don't want you getting influenced by his reckless ideas.”
“I don't get to speak to anyone, anyways.”
“And that's how it should be. We don't know why you're sick, and you shouldn't contaminate someone else.”
“What about you, then? You can get sick too.”
“I'm ready to take that risk.”
He's too nice, you think. All he wants is to take care of you and you put his selfless risks to hell when you decide to disobey him. How horrible of you.
“Now, you need to take that nap for real”, he says. “I will sit by my desk. If you need something you can just let me know.”
He walks back to his desk and sits down, starting to file some paperwork. You tug at the restraints. You're not going anywhere.
When you’ve fallen asleep, Dr Kry makes his way through the hospital. They’ve captured that young man and put him back into his room … and Dr Kry wants a talk with him. He opens the door quietly. The young lays in bed, sleeping. Dr Kry circles around him, taking a good look at him. Did you find him cute? Hot? Did you like talking to him? Did you think that he was better than him? Did you enjoy those ten minutes with him more than these months with Kry? Do you want to meet with him again? He glares at the sleeping man. Dr Kry walks over to the supply closet, an identical to the one in your room, and takes out one of the spare pillows. Silently, he walks over to the bed, lifts the pillow and presses it over the young man’s face. He widen his eyes, pulled out of his slumber. He screams against the pillow, his voice getting muffled in the fabric. 
“Normally, I’d make this easy for you”, Dr Kry grunts as the man starts to fight against him. “Out of pity, but you don’t deserve that mercy.”
He screams in confusion, fear. Dr Kry can make out words. What. No. Help. Stop.
“Just give in and give yourself that mercy”, Dr Kry continues. “If you continue to fight against me, you’ll be in more pain.”
The man cries. Dr Kry breaks out into a smile. 
“You’re going to die either way, you can choose to end it quicker.”
The young man doesn’t seem to get the memo. He continues to fight, cry, plead. He drinks it all in. The horror, the helplessness. The dear in headlight. He has seen the light in people’s eyes disappear multiple times during his job as a doctor. To see the moment someone becomes just a piece of flesh. He has never enjoyed it as much as now. The man stops moving. Dr Kry removes the pillow and takes a step back, looking at the lifeless body. He breathes out. Finally, he can calm down. 
And now, all he needs to do is to make sure he can not be traced back. 
He finds you sleeping soundly as he comes back to your room, wrists still locked to the sides of the bed. You make his heart ache. He sits down beside you, brushing his fingertips over your cheek. 
I control your life, my little one. You’re going to say with me and I’ll take every repercussion to make sure you don’t disappear. 
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noodlemoondle · 2 months ago
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You Always Come First
(No matter how upset I am)
Zayne x Reader
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summary: you and zayne have a small spat over you neglecting your health. as a result of it, you decide to sleep on the couch, not wanting to bother/upset him even further. randomly waking up in the night, you notice you’re no longer alone on the couch and do everything you can to get the doctor back in bed before he’s sore for his shift tomorrow.
tags: not proofread!, hurt/comfort? (i didn’t rlly include the hurt part of it so im not too sure), fluff, literal sleeping together, caring n sweet zayne (when is he not), self indulgent per usual
a/n: bro tumblr is REALLY testing my patience. why is it so dumb with everything i try to post. it’s literally why i haven’t posted a fic in a while. i can’t take this much longer i may crash out soon. anyway, as always hope u enjoy! (⁎˃ᴗ˂⁎)
side tangent: i actually have been so obsessed with caleb. it’s actually a problem. i have been loyal to zayne this entire time and i’ve been playing since release, but caleb is REALLY testing it. lord i’m a sucker for the protective n caring childhood friends to lovers trope (¯―¯٥) (id expect a caleb fic soon tbh if tumblr wants to stop hating me and making my life so difficult)
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the fight was stupid. you were neglecting your health once again not taking your medicine, not resting, and ignoring doctors specific orders. zayne often could never say no to you, he always spoiled you and gave into any of your requests. the only time he was stern and stubborn was when it involved your health, that he doesn’t and will never budge on. you often lacked care for your health, pushing it to the back burners of your mind and often calling zayne dramatic saying “you knew yourself and your limits”. something zayne wasn’t particularly fond of. he confronted you about your recent negligence of your health and both of your stubbornness in your beliefs led to an argument.
it’s been an hour or 2 since it ended though. zayne left to your shared bedroom, most likely to do some work, while you stayed out in the living area, trying to distract yourself from the anger turning to sadness and guilt in your heart. you ended up deciding to just sleep on the couch tonight not wanting to bother him after an argument. you grabbed an extra pillow and thin blanket from a nearby closet and put on a random show so you wouldn’t have to fall asleep listening to your own thoughts. soon enough you were able to relax and fall into a slumber.
you don’t know how long it’s been since you fell asleep. you hear the tv still on as you slowly wake and become aware of your surroundings. once you can see clearly, that’s when you realize you were laying on top of zayne previously using his chest as a pillow unbeknownst to you. he has been peacefully sleeping on the couch with you for who knows how long. as you sat up in a panic you also notice a thicker, softer blanket, one you have preference for, falling off of your shoulders. instantly guilt is washed over you as you look at zayne, who is a somewhat light sleeper, somehow still deep in his sleep. you swallow quickly as you build confidence to wake him up.
you lean closer to his face which was awkwardly propped up by the couch’s arm rest, a position that you couldn’t imagine to be anywhere near comfortable. you lightly tap his shoulder and call his name trying to wake him up. soon enough he does, opening his eyes to see you staring back at him, the faintest smile appears on his face at the sight, almost forgetting of the spat you two shared earlier. before he could even say anything you scold him:
“why are you here? i was sleeping on the couch tonight. you have work early in the morning go back to bed and go to sleep.”
“couldn’t have you sore in the morning” he answers calmly releasing a small yawn in the process.
“neither can you! you have a long shift starting early tomorrow. i’ll be fine just go back to bed.” you quickly rebutted trying to push him off the couch, something that you didn’t have the strength to do, but nevertheless you persisted.
“i can get through a shift with an achy neck, however you can not.” he replies as he softly grabs your hands that are trying to shove him away back to bed.
“i know i’ll be fine. i’ll live to see another day. now go back to bed already!” you say. your voice getting louder as you’re starting to get frustrated trying to break out of his soft grasp.
“will you be joining me?” he asks softly not letting go of your wrists that keep trying to fight against him.
“no, i’m sleeping on the couch!” your voice raising above the tv still playing in the back illuminating the room.
“then it seems like i shall too” he states as he frees your wrists and pushes you back onto his chest, laying the blanket over you both.
before you can even think of a response zayne wraps his arms around your torso and closes his eyes to fall asleep once again, to which you quickly flick his chest to wake him back up. he opens his eyes again and looks down at you with an unamused expression.
“why won’t you just let me sleep here alone?” you ask in a tone he can’t quite place, nevertheless he can hear the slight amount sorrow that came along with it.
“i already told you, i can’t have you go into work tomorrow with a sore neck and back.” he says closing his eyes again despite your wishes against it.
“if you don’t wish to be with me tonight then i’ll sleep on the couch and you can take the bed” he continues. his arms involuntarily tighten ever so slightly around you showing how much he doesn’t want that.
“but i also told you!!! you can’t sleep on the couch, you have a few surgeries to complete, and you have to be in your best shape to do so.” you try to push up against his arms wrapped around you, another pointless action.
zayne sighs and opens his eyes again to look at you before speaking.
“well then you have two options. one, we both move over to the bed to sleep. or two, i sleep here and you sleep over in the room. my job isn’t physically taxing compared to yours, im not allowing you to go in if you don’t have a proper rest.”
he looks tired. you study his features before you respond to him. taking a moment to look at the eyebags under his eyes and a slight frustration growing in his face from this back and forth.
you sigh before answering “then to the bed we go”
a soft smile appears on zaynes face as he begins to get up. his neck slightly sore, but he wouldn’t reveal that to you. although it’s against your wishes, he lifts you up having you hold the blanket and pillow as he carries you back to bed.
he sets you down on your side of the bed, thinking you won’t necessarily want to be close with him tonight. not before tucking you in and kissing the top of your head whispering his love and goodnight wishes. as he gets into bed you turn to face him. once he fully lays down you scootch closer to him and grab onto the hem of his shirt. he instantly understands what you want and pulls you towards him, pressing you to his side as he wraps his arms around you.
he kisses your forehead once more and whispers
“we will continue our discussion after work tomorrow. goodnight, i love you.”
too tired to argue with him anymore you just nod your head against him replying quietly mouth squished against him making your words barely audible.
“goodnight, love you too”
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yeostinys · 6 months ago
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Cry For Me
Pairing: DomCEO!Hongjoong x SubSecretary!Reader
Genre: Smut 18+, slight angst, PWP, Office!AU
Notes: Cheating (don’t do it yall. this is just fiction), Unprotected sex (wrap it up!!! do not try this irl, it is pure fantasy!), explicit language, dacryphilia kink, humiliation, degrading, power fixation, Hongjoong lowkey manipulates (but for the better ig lol)
Word Count: 13k (condensed some ideas to bring down the word count LOL)
Authors note: This is pure horny imagination and in NO WAY, reflects on the characters in real life! If you do not like this type of content pls ignore or block me.
Pt. 2 | Pt. 3
———————————————————————
As you stepped into your apartment, the night sky cast a deep blue glow through the windows, shimmering like a vast ocean. The warm glow of the sensor lights flickered on, illuminating the entryway and casting soft shadows on the walls. You paused for a moment, a frustrated sigh escaping your lips, echoing in the stillness of the room.
It was the fifth time this month that your boyfriend had canceled on you, and each time felt like another nail in the coffin of what once seemed like a blossoming romance. The disappointment settled heavily in your chest, making each step toward the kitchen feel more burdensome than the last.
With a determined resolve, you made your way to the fridge, the familiar chill greeting you as you opened the door. Your fingers closed around a half-filled bottle of wine, the label slightly crumpled from the many times it had been hastily put back. You pulled it out, and reached for a glass. You stare blankly as you poured the wine, watching as the dark liquid rose to the rim, glistening in the soft light. Without hesitation, you brought it to your lips, taking a few deep gulps, each swallow both comforting and numbing. As the warmth spread through you, tears began to prick at the corners of your eyes, a familiar sensation that you had tried so hard to push away.
The memories of the past 2 years flooded back—Siwoo’s laughter, the shared moments that now felt like distant echoes. But lately, he had become a stranger, his warmth replaced by an impenetrable distance. You had tried to reach out, to bridge the growing gap, but each time ended in disappointment. Now, standing in your quiet apartment, you felt a profound sense of loss that had settled deep within you, leaving you feeling numb, as if you were merely going through the motions of life without truly living it.
You quickly wiped your tears away, the salty tracks on your cheeks feeling foreign yet familiar. With each brush of your fingers, the sadness that had threatened to overwhelm you twisted into something sharper—anger.
*Ding.*
The sudden sound pulled your attention away from your thoughts. You turned your head toward your phone, its screen lighting up with a notification. The sight of Siwoo's name, accompanied by a little heart, made your heart sink further.
Siwoo <3: I’m sorry I cancelled again. Please don’t hate me. I’ll see you on your lunch tomorrow.
You stared at the message, the words blurring momentarily as your vision wavered. Another empty promise. With a shaky hand, you raised your glass to your lips, the bitter taste of the wine filling your mouth as you took another long gulp. It was a poor substitute for the warmth you once felt from Siwoo's presence.
You couldn't bring yourself to respond—not now. You needed a few moments to gather your swirling emotions, to avoid lashing out with the hurt and anger that simmered just beneath the surface. The silence of the apartment enveloped you, amplifying your racing thoughts and making the weight of his message all the more suffocating.
Once you finished the rest of the wine bottle, you felt the tension in your shoulders ease just a fraction. You turned away from your phone, not wanting to see another message or another reminder of the chasm that seemed to grow between you. With heavy steps, you made your way to the bedroom.
You plopped down onto the bed, the soft sheets cradling you in their embrace. As your body sank into the mattress, fatigue overtook you, pulling you into a deep slumber. In the quiet darkness, you hoped for dreams that could somehow soothe the ache in your heart, if only for a little while.
———
The next day dawned with a muted light filtering through the curtains, the world outside still waking up. You rolled over, disoriented for a moment, before the reality of the day ahead crashed over you. With a groan, you pushed yourself up, the remnants of last night’s indulgence weighing heavily in your mind.
As you shuffled to the bathroom, the headache from downing that last glass of wine throbbed at your temples, a persistent reminder of your restless night. You cursed under your breath, regretting the decision to finish the bottle in a moment of vulnerability.
You quickly went through the motions of your morning routine. Your job as the secretary for one of the most well-known CEOs in the Creative Arts Institution required precision and poise, a stark contrast to the emotional turmoil that had kept you up late. You dressed in a tailored blouse and a pencil skirt, the fabric smoothing against your skin as you adjusted the collar. The mirror reflected a professional exterior, yet you felt anything but composed inside.
After applying a touch of makeup to mask the fatigue in your eyes, you gathered your things—laptop, planner, and the ever-essential cup of coffee that awaited you in the kitchen.
———
As you step into the tall building, the morning sun filters through the glass façade, casting geometric shadows across the polished marble lobby. The familiar bustle of your colleagues greets you, their voices merging with the gentle hum of fluorescent lights. You nod and smile as you greet in response. You make your way to the elevator, its silver doors glinting in the light. Pressing the button for the top floor, you mentally prepare for the day ahead, trying not to show your exhausted emotions, mentally and physically. When the doors slide open, you step into the expansive hallway lined with art. At the end of the corridor, you enter the grand office door. You walk to the enormous desk adorned with a gold plaque that reads “CEO Kim Hongjoong” and set down the iced Americano you picked up on your way in. You reach into your tote bag and retrieve a neatly organized file folder. Flipping it open, you scan through today’s itinerary, noting the key meetings and tasks that lie ahead. Once satisfied with your briefing, you close the folder and return it to your bag. You head to the front desk positioned just outside the CEO's office, and begin your morning tasks. Every day in the office has settled into a rhythm, a familiar routine that feels almost automatic.
“Good morning, Mr. Kim!” “Hello, Mr. Kim!” The greetings echo as your colleagues bow slightly, their respect palpable.
You rise from your chair, straightening your blouse, and offer a nonchalant nod, masking the exhaustion lingering just beneath the surface.
“Good morning, Mr. Kim,” you say as you bow, forcing a smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes. Hongjoong approaches, his expression warm yet focused.
“Hello, Y/N. Have you prepared everything for today’s schedule?” he asks, moving past you toward his office.
“Yes, you have a meeting in an hour with a client…” you begin to relay the itinerary, following him inside. He settles into his chair, taking a sip of the Americano and nods in response.
“Also, I dealt with the complaints from the last exhibition. Everything’s been taken care of, just like you wanted,” you add, your tone casual, though the weight of your own issues tugs at your thoughts. Hongjoong looks up, a smile breaking across his face.
“That’s why I have you as my secretary, Miss Y/N. Thank you so much.”
You nod, the compliment momentarily brightening your mood, but it’s fleeting. You bow again before slipping out of the office. As the door closes behind you, you take a deep breath, pushing the worries from your relationship to the back of your mind, ready to tackle the day ahead with practiced indifference.
Throughout the morning, you flit in and out of meetings, accompanying Hongjoong as he navigates a flurry of tasks. The office is a hive of activity, and you move seamlessly between conversations, taking notes and organizing files, but the weight of your personal life hangs heavy in the back of your mind.
You glance at the clock on your desk: just thirty minutes until your hour break. A sigh escapes your lips, and you reach for your phone, hesitating. Siwoo’s message sits unread, a lingering question mark in your thoughts. You know you should respond, but the uncertainty of his invitation makes you hesitate. Is it pettiness that keeps you from reaching out, or a defense mechanism to shield your heart from further pain? You shake off the intrusive thoughts, forcing yourself to focus on the tasks at hand.
*Ding.* Your phone buzzes, drawing your attention. It’s another message from Siwoo.
Siwoo <3: I won’t be able to make it today. Something came up at work. Sorry.
You scoff under your breath, a bitter taste filling your mouth. His absence stings, but you’ve braced yourself for this—after all, it’s become a pattern.
Just then, Hongjoong’s voice crackles through the telephone intercom on your desk, interrupting your spiraling thoughts. “Miss Y/N, please come to my office.”
“Yes, sir,” you reply, rising from your seat with a practiced smile as you make your way into his office.
“What can I do for you, Mr. Kim?” you ask, your tone polite, carefully masking the frustration beneath the surface from Siwoo’s message.
Hongjoong leans back in his chair, his expression serious.
“I know you have your hour break in twenty minutes, but I just got off the phone with a potential client. They want to meet over lunch in a few minutes, and I need you to tag along to take notes. If you can wait on your break for another hour, I’ll cover your meal if you accompany me now.”
His words feel more like an instruction than a request, and you nod in response, pushing your personal frustrations aside.
“Of course, sir. Shall I call the chauffeur now?”
“No need,” he replies, grabbing his briefcase. “We’ll take my vehicle. I’ll drive.”
You nod and follow Hongjoong out of the building.
You settled into the passenger seat next to Hongjoong, the sleek interior of the car enveloping you. The rhythmic clicking of the turn signal punctuated the silence, while the soft murmur of the news on the radio served as a gentle backdrop.
“Miss Y/N, is everything alright?” Hongjoong's voice cut through the quiet, steady and attentive. You turned to him, slightly taken aback by his directness.
“Y-Yes, sir. What makes you concerned?” you replied, a hint of surprise coloring your voice. His eyes remained fixed on the road, focused yet perceptive.
“My top employee—my secretary—has been unusually quiet lately. You seem a bit off,” he remarked, expertly navigating the car into a parking lot. His concern was genuine, and you felt a flutter of warmth at his attention.
“I apologize if I gave that impression today, sir. I assure you, I’m alright,” you replied, straightening in your seat, trying to project confidence. Hongjoong parked the car and turned to face you, his expression serious.
“Y/N, I’m not just talking about today. You’ve been like this for a few days now. I don’t want to pry, but if something is bothering you, please let me know. You never slack off—well, not that I’ve noticed—but you’re a vital part of our team. If you’re not at your best, it affects us all, especially me. Let’s tackle any issues together, professionally.” His words carried a weight of understanding that took you by surprise.
You hesitated, unsure of how much to reveal.
“I… I apologize, sir. It’s just some personal issues in my relationship. I promise I won’t let it interfere with my work,” you said softly, your gaze dropping to your hands in your lap. You feared that honesty might blur the lines of your professional relationship.
Hongjoong regarded you with a thoughtful expression, his brow slightly furrowing. “Problems in your relationship?” he asked gently. You nodded, keeping your head bowed.
“Yes. I appreciate you asking,” you replied, feeling a rush of gratitude mixed with apprehension.
“Thank you for sharing that with me,” he said, his tone shifting back to his usual professional demeanor. “Let’s get to work.”
The next hour unfolded at a high-end restaurant, its luxurious ambiance creating the perfect setting for a business meeting. You sat next to Hongjoong, across from two potential clients, the atmosphere charged with opportunity. As they discussed plans for an upcoming exhibition, you diligently took notes, your mind sharpening as you transitioned into your role.
Hongjoong exuded charisma, ordering champagne and an array of exquisite appetizers while skillfully guiding the conversation. You admired the way he balanced authority with approachability, creating an atmosphere of collaboration.
———
As promised, Hongjoong granted you your hour break once you both returned to the office. The day had been packed with meetings and conversations, but you had already eaten at the restaurant, so instead of lingering in the bustling atmosphere of the office, you decided to find solace on the rooftop.
Ascending to the rooftop, you pushed open the heavy door, the cool air hitting your face like a refreshing wave. You walked over to one of the bistro tables, the metal surface gleaming under the midday sun. You sank into one of the chairs, letting out a deep sigh that released the pent-up stress from the morning. In your left hand, you cradled an iced Americano to keep you alert. In your right, you held your phone, its screen illuminating your face as you contemplated the text messages from Siwoo.
He should be off work by now, you thought, scrolling through the thread of messages. You hesitated, biting your lip, unsure of how to approach him. The uncertainty had lingered in your mind for days, and it felt like a weight on your chest. After a moment’s deliberation, you resolved to take initiative and give him a call.
You tapped his name, and set the phone on speaker. As the phone rang, the sound echoed in the serene space around you. It rang for what felt like an eternity until finally, you heard his voice on the other end, slightly breathless.
“H-hello? Y/N?” Siwoo stuttered, his tone hesitant.
“Siwoo, what are you doing?” you asked, trying to sound calm, though your heart raced with anticipation.
“Mmm, n-nothing much, just working out. I-I went to the gym after work,” he replied, punctuating his words with a grunt that surprised you. You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion. Since when did he ever work out?
You decided to push forward, hoping to reconnect. “Do you want to come over tonight? I’ll make dinner,” you offered, softening your voice as if trying to coax him back into your world.
“A-ahh, probably not tonight. I have to finish some work at h-home,” he stuttered again, his voice strained, as though he were struggling for breath.
Disappointment settled in your stomach, but you pressed on. “I can come over then, yeah? I’ll make you your favorite dish?” You mentally kicked yourself for even suggesting it, a flicker of doubt reminding you of all the times he had flaked out before.
“N-no, Y/N. I-It’s okay. A-ahh!” Siwoo grunted loudly, and a chill ran through you at the sound.
“Siwoo, what’s going on?!” You raised your voice slightly, urgency creeping in.
“I told you, Y/N. I’m working out. We can’t see each other tonight; I’m busy. I have to go,” he snapped, the finality in his tone cutting through the air like a knife. The line went dead, leaving you with only the echo of his voice. Your heart sank, a familiar ache running within you.
You stared at the phone in disbelief, the cool metal suddenly feeling heavy in your hand. How could he do this again? A mix of frustration and sadness swirled in your chest, and you felt a lump form in your throat. You took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself, but it did little to quell the rising tide of emotions.
——
You glance at the small digits on your screen, the glowing numbers reading 8:00 PM. Your shift officially ended thirty minutes ago, but here you sat, a blend of dedication and denial keeping you tethered to your desk. Guilt washed over you, a stark reminder of Hongjoong’s earlier words. There was no point in heading home, not when the weight of unfinished tasks bore down on you. The quiet of your apartment would only invite sorrow, while the office, though nearly deserted, offered a comforting distraction.
The atmosphere had shifted; the energy of the day had given way to silence as colleagues trickled out, exchanging soft goodbyes. Each farewell came with a gentle reminder not to work too hard, and you managed a smile, masking the turmoil brewing inside you. Once they departed, you returned your focus to the glowing screen, rifling through files and diligently noting necessary information, your fingers a blur over the keyboard.
A flicker of light caught your eye—a warm streaming light from Hongjoong’s office. You raised an eyebrow in curiosity; you’d assumed he had left an hour ago. Shaking off the thoughts that threatened to wander, you turned back to your work.
“Y/N?” Hongjoong’s voice broke through your concentration. You looked up at him through your rectangular glasses that rested on your face. He cut an impressive figure, dressed in a fitted black dress shirt and a black vest that accentuated his shoulders.(What the fuck Y/N; he’s your boss.) You mentally scolded yourself, attempting to dismiss any inappropriate thoughts.
“O-Oh, yes sir?” you replied, setting your pen down on the desk.
“Your shift ended an hour ago. Why are you still here?” His brow arched in genuine curiosity, his tone both commanding and concerned.
“I’m just catching up on some work, sir. I apologize. I’ll be heading home soon,” you replied, striving for composure even as nerves danced in your stomach.
“Y/N, come to my office,” he said, his calm demeanor masking the authority in his request. You hesitated, uncertainty creeping in. Why did he want to speak in private, especially when the office was nearly empty?
Despite your reservations, you take off your glasses frames, place them on your desk and follow him into his office. The door clicking shut behind you, a sound that felt like a declaration. The dim light cast long shadows, enveloping the room. He sits at the edge of his desk with his arms crossed.
“What’s going on in your relationship?” Hongjoong asked, his tone direct yet oddly informal. The question hung in the air, leaving you momentarily stunned. Your eyes widened, and you felt a flush creeping up your neck.
“Sir, I don’t think it’s appropriate to talk about personal matters at work…” you managed to reply, your fingers fidgeting nervously as you avoided his gaze.
“It’s after work hours, Y/N. You can speak comfortably,” he said, his voice calm and soothing, yet imbued with a sharpness that conveyed he was not one to be easily dismissed. “I can tell something is wrong.”
You hesitated, the weight of his gaze making it difficult to formulate a response. A swirl of emotions crashed over you—fear of crossing professional boundaries mixed with the realization that perhaps he genuinely wanted to connect with you on a deeper level. Colleagues had often joked about how you and Hongjoong were like a married couple at work, a notion you had always brushed aside. The title felt cliché, almost childish, and you had preferred to maintain a strictly professional atmosphere.
But as you looked at him, a flicker of understanding passed between you. Maybe he wasn’t just playing the role of the CEO tonight. Perhaps he truly wanted to understand what you were going through. You took a deep breath, your heart racing as you considered opening up.
“We have… just been distant lately,” you say hesitantly, the words slipping out with reluctance. “Our schedules don’t seem to be aligning, and our communication is off. That is all, sir.” You glance at him, searching for a response.
He hums thoughtfully, nodding in acknowledgment. “Shall I… cut your hours? Maybe find a second secretary to fill in while you get to spend more time with your significant other?” His voice carried a teasing lilt, yet there was an undercurrent of seriousness that sent a rush of heat to your cheeks.
“N-no, sir!” The words escaped your lips almost too hastily, an instinctive reaction that made you feel slightly embarrassed. Hongjoong chuckled, his head lowering momentarily before he lifted it again, locking eyes with you.
“So, is it his schedule that’s not cooperating with yours?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. You nodded in silence, the weight of your emotions pressing down as you considered the truth behind your answer.
“Mm… interesting.” Hongjoong tapped his chin thoughtfully, the wheels of his mind clearly turning. Curiosity prickled at you; what was going through his head? You couldn’t help but wonder about the direction this conversation was taking.
“Y/N, if you don’t mind me asking, what does your partner do for a living?” he asked, his tone calm and inviting.
“He’s a professor at the university located downtown,” you replied softly, your voice barely above a whisper, as if sharing a secret.
“A professor?” Hongjoong mused, a hint of skepticism coloring his tone. “I doubt their schedules are that busy compared to yours—a full-time secretary for a well-known company.” He dropped his hands into his pockets, his gaze intent and probing.
“Are you sure you should be concerned about his schedule? Maybe… it’s something more?” Hongjoong added nonchalantly, his casual demeanor contrasting sharply with the seriousness of his implication.
You felt a wave of confusion wash over you. What was he suggesting? Your mind raced, trying to decipher his words. Was he implying that the distance in your relationship could be rooted in something deeper than just busy schedules? The thought unsettled you, but a part of you was intrigued by his concern. You hesitated, caught in a web of uncertainty as you considered how to respond.
“I—I’m not sure what you mean, sir…” you murmured, your gaze dropping to your black heels, the polished tips reflecting the dim light of the office.
“Come here, Y/N,” Hongjoong said, his voice a blend of softness and authority that sent a shiver down your spine. Almost instinctively, you found your feet moving toward him, the rhythmic click of your pumps echoing softly against the floor as you approached. You stopped just in front of his black loafers, your heart racing in your chest.
“Closer,” he instructed, his voice lowering, deepening with an intensity that made you catch your breath. You stepped forward, positioning yourself between his slightly parted legs, the air thick with unspoken tension.
His hand reached out, a gentle yet firm grasp settling on your waist. You gasped in shock, the unexpected warmth of his touch flooding through you. This is wrong, you thought, panic stirring within, but something deeper held you in place, a pull that made it difficult to consider pulling away. Instead, you stood there, caught in a moment that felt both exhilarating and terrifying.
“Maybe…” Hongjoong began, his thumb rubbing softly against the fabric of your blouse, the gentle motion both soothing and unsettling.
“your partner is being unfaithful…?” The words hung heavy in the air, a sentence that felt like a blade slicing through your gut.
A part of you recoiled at the thought, refusing to believe it. Yet, as you stood there, something nagged at you, a whisper of doubt that you couldn’t shake. The realization that he might be right crept in like a shadow, darkening your thoughts. Stupidly, your heart leaped to defend Siwoo, the man you cared for, even as uncertainty gnawed at you.
“Mr. Kim, I don’t appreciate you assuming that,” you replied quietly, your voice barely above a whisper as you stared between the gap of Hongjoong’s legs that revealed the floor, refusing to meet his gaze.
“You don’t know our relationship, so please do not accuse him of such acts…” you added, your tone a fragile mixture of firmness and vulnerability. As the words left your lips, you felt your eyes begin to well with tears, confusion and anger swirling within you. You trusted Siwoo; you had to. But the doubts Hongjoong had planted took root, and you didn’t understand why he was suddenly acting like this.
You wanted to leave, to escape the charged atmosphere and the unsettling intimacy of the moment, but your feet remained stuck to the floor. Deep down, beneath the rising tide of panic, you recognized that you craved the odd comfort Hongjoong provided, a warmth that felt so different from the turmoil in your heart.
Suddenly, a whimper escaped your lips, a sound that surprised you as tears began to cascade down your cheeks, dropping onto Hongjoong’s lap.
“Oh, baby…” Hongjoong cooed, his voice laced with a tenderness. You gasped at the sudden pet name. With a gentle yet deliberate movement, his unoccupied hand reached toward your face, lifting your chin slightly so that he could wipe away the tears that streamed relentlessly down. Your eyes however, still refusing to look at him. The warmth of his touch sent a shiver through you, and your heart raced at the intimacy of the moment.
“You defend him, yet you’re crying,” he observed, his voice low and soothing, but his words only added to the turmoil within you. It was as if he could see right through the facade you had tried to maintain. As his hand, previously resting on your waist, moved to the other side of your face, you felt the weight of his palms cupping your cheeks, an act of reassurance that both calmed and stirred your emotions.
“Look at me, Y/N” Hongjoong softly demands. Your pretty eyes look at him. Sparkling from the tears that are still streaming down your face slowly. Hongjoong bit his lip, fighting to maintain his composure, though he couldn’t help but think how fucken pretty you look when you cried… how vulnerable.
“I’m sorry for assuming,” he continued, his tone tender yet firm. “It was unprofessional of me. I was just trying to express my concerns.” His fingers brushed against your skin as he gently cupped your face, his thumbs softly stroking away the remnants of your tears. “I don’t want to see you cry anymore, okay?”
Confusion swirled within you, a mix of gratitude and uncertainty. What was Hongjoong doing? His touch sent conflicting signals through your mind, making it hard to decipher the intentions behind his kindness. You felt your heart race as he held your gaze, searching for answers that remained elusive.
“Let me take you home. It’s getting late.” He reluctantly withdrew his hands, the warmth of his touch lingering on your skin. Hongjoong lightly tapped your waist,
“Okay?” he asked again, his voice softening as he sought your approval. You nodded, your heart fluttering as you looked into his eyes, those doe-like orbs filled with an innocence that belied the complexities of your situation. The air between you was thick with unspoken words, each moment stretching out as you found solace in his presence, even amidst the confusion.
———
The car glided smoothly along the quiet streets, the only sounds breaking the stillness were the gentle notes floating from the radio and the rhythmic tapping of Hongjoong’s fingers on the steering wheel. Each beat resonated with the unspoken tension lingering between you, a subtle backdrop to the whirlwind of thoughts spinning in your mind.
As the car pulled up in front of your apartment building, you felt a mix of relief and reluctance. The evening air was cool against your skin as you unbuckled your seatbelt and gathered your bags, the weight of the day still heavy on your shoulders.
“Thank you for the ride, Mr. Kim,” you said, bowing your head slightly, unable to meet his gaze. It was a gesture of politeness, but it felt more like a shield, protecting you from the warmth of his soft smile that you could sense even without looking.
“No worries, Miss Y/N. I’ll see you Monday,” he replied, his voice soft but filled with an unshakeable confidence. You heard the warmth in his tone, even as you turned away and walked towards the entrance of your apartment building, his farewell echoing in your ears.
The elevator ride felt interminable as you ascended to your floor, each ding of the buttons amplifying the heaviness in your chest. Finally, you stepped into your small apartment, the familiar space offering little comfort. You dragged your feet toward your room, exhaustion pulling you down, both physically and emotionally.
Once inside, you kicked off your heels, the sharp clack against the floor a welcome relief. You stripped off your clothes with a mindless haste, leaving only your undergarments as you collapsed onto your bed. The cool sheets enveloped you, but they couldn’t ease the confusion swirling in your thoughts.
With a deep, resigned sigh, you sank into the mattress, your mind replaying fragments of your conversation with Hongjoong.
In a moment of desperation, you reached for your phone, dialing Siwoo’s number. The ringing felt like an eternity, and when it went to voicemail, a knot tightened in your stomach. You glanced at the clock—10 PM. Another attempt led to the same unyielding voicemail. Frustration filled within you, mixing with a pang of anxiety that settled in your chest.
You closed your eyes, trying to steady your breathing. The coolness of the room contrasted sharply with the heat of your thoughts. Slowly, memories of Hongjoong flooded your mind—his perfect figure leaning casually against the desk, his strong hand lingering on your arm, the gentle caress of his fingers against your face.
Your heart ached, not for Siwoo, but for Hongjoong. You suddenly craved his comforting and reassuring voice. His lingering touch on your skin. Your legs close together as you feel a wave of warmth between your thighs. Your hands moved down your soft skin, reaching towards your heat…
You gasp softly, shaking your head, trying to dismiss these feelings. This wasn’t supposed to be happening. You shouldn’t be thinking about him like this. Hongjoong is your Boss. And plus you have Siwoo. Your… loving boyfriend.
The weight of silence wraps around you like a thick fog, pressing down on your chest as you lie in bed, staring at the ceiling. You can’t shake the feeling that these spiraling thoughts. In frustration you convince yourself that you’re probably just deprived of touch from your significant other.
With sudden resolve, you push yourself up from the tangled sheets, the cool air sending a shiver down your spine, and head towards the bathroom. Turning on the water, you let your thoughts drown in the hot water. Making your way back to your room, you slowly dry off and change into pajamas.
As your head hits the pillow, a sense of calm envelops you, pulling you into a deep slumber. The world outside fades, and for the first time in ages, you allow yourself to drift away, hoping that tomorrow will bring a spark of connection back into your life.
———
The first rays of sunlight filtered through the blinds, casting soft stripes across your home office. You’re working from home today, since Hongjoong isn’t in office on the weekends. You sat your desk with a steaming cup of coffee cradled in your hands, you let the aroma fill your senses, the rich, dark liquid fueling your focus as your fingers typing across the keyboard.
The rhythmic sound of your typing created a serene atmosphere until it was interrupted by a sharp buzz from the apartment door.
Setting your coffee down, you pushed back your chair and stood, feeling a strange mix of anticipation and dread as you approached the door. Taking a deep breath, you swung it open, and your heart dropped. Standing there, looking both sheepish and regretful, was Siwoo, clutching a bouquet of flowers.
“Y/N, honey, I’m so sorry for flaking out on you so many times,” he said with a fake pout.
A year ago, you would have melted at this display. You might have accepted his half-assed apology with a smile, the flowers a token of his remorse. But today, your mind raced with reminders of all the times he had done this before. The constant stand-ups, the empty promises, the fleeting moments of connection overshadowed by disappointment.
Your heart ached, not with the sweet pang of love but with the heavy weight of frustration. You stood there, staring at him, emotions swirling within you like a storm. Hurt and upset battled against the tenderness that still lingered for him. You could feel the walls you had carefully built in the past months tightening around you, whispering that this was a cycle you were tired of repeating.
But your heart, foolishly hopeful, betrayed you. Before you could think it through, you found yourself reaching for the bouquet, inhaling the sweet scent of fresh blooms. Then, without a second thought, you pulled him into a tight embrace. As his arms wrapped around you, the familiar warmth flooded back, and you felt your resolve waver.
In that moment, you wanted to believe that this time would be different. Yet beneath the surface, a deeper ache throbbed—a desperate question lingered in your mind: why do you keep doing this to me?
As the hours unfolded, Siwoo settled into a chair across from your desk, his laptop open and papers scattered around him. The familiar hum of shared work surrounded you, a scene that once brought you joy. He would glance up occasionally, flashing you a smile that was meant to soothe the tension in the air. Yet, despite the comforting proximity, your heart was locked in a battle against the memories of hurt he had inflicted upon you.
You tried to push those thoughts aside, forcing yourself to focus on the tasks at hand. Still, they lingered like unwelcome shadows, flitting in and out of your consciousness. Each time Siwoo laughed at something on his screen or leaned back with a satisfied sigh, a part of you wanted to bask in the moment, to let yourself feel the happiness he once brought. But the other part—a weary, wiser part—reminded you of the countless times he had let you down.
Your mind already flooded with so many issues, decided to remind you of last night’s conversation with Hongjoong—the way he spoke to you, his touch… The longing for deeper connections hung heavily on your mind, teasing you with confusion.
You caught Siwoo watching you, a flicker of concern crossing his face. “Hey, you okay?” he asked, his voice breaking through your reverie.
You forced a smile, nodding slightly. “Yeah, just thinking about work.”
———
Throughout the day, with Siwoo at your side, a disquieting realization settled in your chest: you felt less like his girlfriend and more like a maid. He moved to lounge in your living room, casually asking for snacks and drinks while you sat at your desk, trying to concentrate on your work. Each request chipped away at your patience, drawing a line between the intimate moments you once cherished and the mundane reality of this interaction.
Glancing over, you caught sight of him: relaxed, almost carefree, tapping away on his phone with a soft laugh escaping his lips. Maybe it was Hongjoong’s words playing tricks on you, but a knot twisted in your stomach as you watched Siwoo, feeling an unfamiliar ick wash over you. It felt as though he was taking advantage of your hospitality, oblivious to the growing frustration bubbling within you.
“Oh, Y/N, can I borrow some money?” Siwoo asked, his voice casual, his eyes glued to the screen as he continued to chuckle at whatever amused him.
“May I ask why?” You replied softly, a frown creasing your brow as confusion settled in.
“I need to buy new materials for work. It’s required for all professors, and I’m just short by a few bucks,” he explained, his gaze still firmly fixed on his phone.
You raised an eyebrow, skepticism creeping in. “Doesn’t the university cover materials for professors?”
“Mmm, not this time. Please?” he said, finally looking up at you, his irritating smile brightening his face as if he expected you to fold under the charm.
Taking a deep breath, you felt the tension in your chest tighten, but you nodded anyway, wiring him a sum that was likely more than he needed. Maybe it was an act of guilt or an old habit of wanting to keep the peace.
“Thanks, honey. You’re the best!” he said, standing up and slinging his bag over his shoulder. The grin on his face widened as he returned to his phone, engrossed once more in whatever had captured his attention.
“Y—you’re leaving so soon?” The words spilled out before you could stop them, a mix of desperation and disappointment. “I’m almost done with work. Let’s have dinner…”
He turned to you, his expression unchanged. “Maybe another day, Y/N. I have to head back to the campus.”
With that, he walked out without a backward glance, leaving you standing there, a swirl of emotions crashing against one another. As the door clicked shut, the weight of his absence pressed heavily on your heart, mingling with the irritation that had been building all day.
——
The weekend slipped away in a blur, its fleeting hours vanishing like sand through fingers. As you stepped into the office on Monday morning, you glanced around the workspace, filled with the scent of fresh coffee and the faint rustle of papers, and realized you wanted to be here. The thought of Hongjoong entered your mind unbidden. You couldn’t help but remember the conversations that had left you feeling confused but wanting more.
But you quickly pushed those thoughts aside, chastising yourself. This wasn’t the time for daydreams. You were his secretary, bound by professional decorum. It was crucial to maintain composure, to focus on your tasks and responsibilities. After all, any semblance of personal feelings could only complicate matters.
“Good morning, Mr. Kim,” you said, bowing slightly from your desk as he entered his office, and you follow behind him. The air felt charged with unspoken tension, a remnant of the incident that had unfolded just days prior, a moment you both seemed to ignore.
“Good morning, Miss Y/N,” Hongjoong replied, a hint of a smile playing on his lips as he settled into his chair behind the desk. His eyes flickered momentarily to the iced Americano you had picked up for him earlier, the cool condensation glistening against the glass.
“What is the schedule for today?” he asked, leaning back in his chair, his posture relaxed, but you could sense the sharpness in his gaze as it remained fixed on you.
Clearing your throat, you began to relay the day’s itinerary, focusing intently on your notes. “We have the marketing meeting at ten, followed by the conference call with the investors at noon.” You spoke steadily, but your heart raced, memories of that night creeping back into your mind—a fleeting brush of his hands, the way his gaze had pierced through the façade of professionalism.
Hongjoong listened, nodding occasionally, but there was an air of distraction about him, too. He was acting as if nothing had happened, and you were determined to do the same, though it felt like walking a tightrope. You maintained your composure, forcing yourself to keep your voice steady and professional as you continued.
His expression remained neutral, but there was an undercurrent of something unspoken between you. You stole a glance at him, noting how the light caught the edges of his features, the way he effortlessly commanded the space around him.
“And finally,” you added, pushing the memories further down, “we have a team meeting at four to discuss the new project timeline.”
As you finished, a heavy silence settled in the room, punctuated only by the soft sound of his drink being set down on the desk. You met his gaze, feeling the weight of the unacknowledged moment hanging in the air. “Thank you, Y/N,” Hongjoong said, his voice smooth as he rose from his chair. The brief moment of gratitude hung in the air between you, creating a small, intimate space in an otherwise professional atmosphere. You bowed slightly in acknowledgment, the familiar gesture a part of your daily routine, before you turned on your heels, ready to leave the room.
“Wait a moment,” he called out just as you reached the door. You paused, your heart skipping a beat, then turned back to face him.
“Yes, sir?” you replied, your voice steady but your mind racing.
“How are you doing?” he asked, the question casual yet layered with an unexpected warmth. The simplicity of it took you aback, a small flicker of surprise igniting within you.
“I—I’m well, sir. Thank you for asking.” You stumbled over your words slightly, an involuntary shyness creeping in. “How about you?” You returned the question out of politeness.
“That’s good to hear, Y/N,” he replied, his soft smile breaking through the formalities and lighting up the room. “I’m doing fine as well.”
You nodded, the warmth of his expression lingering in the air as you took in the moment. “I’ll get back to my work then,” you said, turning once more to leave.
As you stepped out of his office, the door closing softly behind you, you made your way back to your desk, the echo of his words and that fleeting smile still resonating within you.
——
Once you stepped out of Hongjoong’s office, he sank back into his chair, the weight of the world settling on his shoulders as his thoughts turned inward, swirling around you. He couldn’t deny the fondness he felt. From the moment you had started working as his secretary, you had made it clear that you were in a serious relationship. He respected your loyalty, admired it even, but it didn’t erase the growing complexity of his own feelings for you.
As he gazed out the window, memories flooded back, particularly the recent lunch meeting on Friday. You had accompanied him at the last minute, and during the drive, when you admitted to him about your relationship struggles. The admission struck him deeply—he felt a flicker of triumph at your honesty, a selfish part of him celebrating. Yet, mingled with that spark was a simmering anger; the man you were with was clearly causing you distress.
After returning to the office, you took your promised hour break, and Hongjoong found himself drawn to the rooftop. He hadn’t intended to pry; he simply wanted to offer words of encouragement, to lift your spirits. But as he approached, he overheard your phone ring and the familiar cadence of your voice pick up the call. A sinking feeling took root in his stomach when he recognized the voice on the other end—Siwoo, your boyfriend.
He paused at the steel door, unable to resist the urge to listen. Siwoo’s breathless tone was unmistakable, the hurried speech revealing more than mere exertion from a workout. Hongjoong's heart raced as he deduced the truth— Any man would know, this was not the voice of a faithful partner. The realization struck him like a punch; this man had the audacity to take your call while clearly entangled in something inappropriate.
A rush of guilt washed over him as he retreated to his office, grappling with the anger that grew beneath the surface. How could someone hurt you, an innocent, kind, and beautiful person? He felt torn, wanting to protect you while recognizing the boundaries he had vowed to uphold.
In the hours that followed, a storm of thoughts brewed within him. It was reckless, perhaps, but the idea of bringing you into his office after hours began to take root. He wanted to voice his concerns casually. But when you began to softly cry, that’s when he felt the line blur. The sight of your flushed cheeks, your pretty doe-like eyes glistening with unshed tears— (fuck, he shouldn’t be thinking like that).
Hongjoong pulled back from his reminiscent thoughts, deciding it was best to let you navigate this situation on your own. Maybe you would uncover the truth about Siwoo, perhaps the pieces would fall into place. But the uncertainty gnawed at him, and as he sat in his office, he couldn’t help but wonder how much longer he could contain his feelings, how much longer he could remain a silent observer to your heartache.
Fuck it? Hongjoong thought to himself. Siwoo deserves a taste of his own medicine.
Hongjoong scoffed to himself at his idea as he sipped on his coffee.
———
The workday unfolded in its usual rhythm, a blur of emails, calls, and the occasional paperwork that seemed to multiply by the hour. You navigated through the tasks with a practiced efficiency, though your mind occasionally drifted to the flurry of messages buzzing on your phone. Each notification from Siwoo felt like a weight pressing down on you, filled with meaningless apologies, and pleads to wire money for some other things, god knows what he needed it for.
With a deep breath, you made the decision to ignore his messages for now. You turned your focus back to your work, fingers typing over the keyboard, pouring your energy into the tasks at hand.
As you typed, the sound of footsteps drew your attention. You looked up to find Hongjoong standing before your desk, his presence commanding yet familiar. He had a way of drawing you in, and for a moment, the chaos of your personal life faded into the background.
“Miss Y/N, please come to my office after work hours,” he said, his tone smooth yet imbued with a seriousness that piqued your curiosity. He turned and strode into his office, leaving you with a flurry of thoughts.
“Yes, sir,” you replied softly, your voice barely above a whisper as you watched him go.
With a sigh, you returned to your work, the clock ticking steadily toward the end of the day. Each keystroke felt heavier as the minutes dragged on, and the anticipation of your meeting with Hongjoong lingered like a sweet ache in your heart.
———
As the final colleagues trickled out of the building, the quiet hum of the office began to settle into an echo of solitude. You sighed as you recalled Hongjoong’s instructions. Straightening your buttoned blouse and smoothing down your skirt, you prepared yourself for whatever awaited you in his office.
You knocked softly, the sound barely breaking the silence.
“Come in,” Hongjoong’s voice resonated through the door. You opened it slowly and stepped inside, closing it behind you with a soft click.
Hongjoong was seated at his desk, his white dress shirt sleeves rolled up, revealing strong forearms accentuated by a dark tie. The sight of him brought a swirl of emotions; he exuded an effortless charisma that both intimidated and drew you in.
“You wanted to see me, sir?” you said, your gaze fixed on the floor, an attempt to hide the mix of anxiety and curiosity swelling inside you.
“Yes, please come here, Y/N,” he replied, his voice calm and low. As you approached him, the familiar sound of your heels clicking against the polished floor echoed in your mind, reminding you of the similar situation a few days ago in this very spot.
“Please, sit,” he gestured toward the chair in front of his desk. You took a seat, positioning yourself at the edge, an instinctive reaction born from uncertainty.
Hongjoong rose from his chair and began to circle around the desk, a pen spinning effortlessly between his slender fingers. The movement was fluid, almost hypnotic, and it pulled your attention as you tried to read his expression.
“Miss Y/N,” he began, pausing for a moment, “you’re one of my smartest employees, correct?” His gaze remained focused elsewhere, a slight distance in his eyes.
“Th—thank you, sir. I—” you started, but his voice cut through your response.
“A person with an important job like yours requires a lot of skill, attentiveness… and have the ability assess the environment around the office, Correct?”
“Yes… that is correct, sir,” you replied quietly, maintaining eye contact,
“Would you agree that you have been lacking some of these skills, Y/N?” Hongjoong stopped infront of you, sitting at the edge of his desk. His arms crossed over his chest, revealing the strong veins that ran along his forearms, an unconscious display of his physicality that made your heart race.
“I—I haven’t noticed, sir. I apologize if I haven’t been performing well…” The words tumbled out, anxiety creeping in. Were you about to get fired? The thought sent a chill through you, and you mentally recoiled at the prospect of your life spiraling further down.
“I’m not going to fire you, Y/N,” he said, and your eyes widened in surprise; it was as if he had plucked the thought straight from your mind.
“I’m not really following this conversation, sir…” you confessed, your voice barely above a whisper as you began to fidget with your fingers in your lap, seeking any distraction from the mounting tension.
Hongjoong released a frustrated sigh, and suddenly he pushed himself off the edge of the desk, stepping toward you slowly. His strong arms landed on the armrests of your chair, effectively trapping you in place. He leaned in closer, the proximity forcing you to lean back into the seat, a gasp escaping your lips at the sudden intimacy of the moment.
The air between you thickened. You could feel the heat radiating from him, the sharpness of his gaze holding you captive.
He scoffed, the corner of his lip turning into a smirk as he looked down. His eyes landed on the unbuttoned opening of your shirt. He sees your chest breathing up and down in anticipation. He looks up, gazes at your lips quickly before looking into your eyes.
“For someone so pretty and smart, you’re quite naive” He chuckles. A rush of heat seeps into your cheeks. You’re at a loss for words. You don’t know how to respond, so you opt to stay silent.
“Miss Y/N” Hongjoong says sternly in a soft voice.
“Yes, Sir?” You quietly reply back.
“Can you assess the environment in this office right now?” His voice is a whisper.
“U—Uhm…” you stutter, not knowing what to say. Hongjoong chuckles at your flustered expression.
“Let me give you a hint, Y/N” Hongjoong whispers and leans in closer, his presence enveloping you like a warm wave. Then, in a moment that felt both thrilling and terrifying, his lips brushed against yours. Your eyes widened in shock. This is wrong, a voice in your mind screamed. You shouldn’t be doing this. But as much as you tried to summon the strength to pull away, your body betrayed you.
His lips were soft, warm, and surprisingly gentle as they molded against yours, igniting a fire that swept through you. The worries around you faded, leaving only the two of you suspended in this unexpected moment. It felt as if time had stopped, your heartbeat loud in your ears, drowning out the rational thoughts that screamed for you to stop.
As he finally pulled away, the distance felt electric, charged with a lingering intimacy. His gaze searched yours, earnest and intense. “Do you understand now?” he murmured, his breath warm against your skin. You nod slowly.
“Do you want me to stop?” He asks softly as he looks at your plush lips. You hesitate, unsure of what to say. All you know is that you want whatever lingering feelings Hongjoong has bestowed on you. As much as you know it’s wrong, you can’t help but crave him.
In response to his question, You shake your head in protest. His thumb caresses your chin tilting your head to look up at him.
“Use your words baby.” Hongjoong’s voice is low as he stares into your eyes, searching for an answer.
“Please… don’t stop sir.” You say quietly. Hongjoong smirks and pulls way from you. You look at him confused. His position is sat back onto the edge of his desk.
“Show me you want it too Y/N” He’s teasing you. Wanting to see how far you’re willing to go. Knowing that deep inside, as much as you want this you still feel a tiny ounce of guilt from being unfaithful to your partner. Regardless, You rise from the chair and make your way to Hongjoong. You position yourself between his legs that are slightly spread and place both your arms on his shoulders. You lean forward and kiss him. Hongjoong returns the kiss almost immediately. He can feel himself already growing hard as his lips move against yours. His hands are securely gripped onto your waist bringing you closer to him. He deepens the kiss and swipes his tongue over the bottom of your lip. In response your mouth opens as you release a whimper. Both of your tongues now move together skillfully, resulting in a moan from both of you. As the heated make-out session continues, you notice Hongjoong’s arm pushing away some papers and other items on the desk behind him.
Smoothly, Hongjoong moves your position, his strong arms swiftly carry your body onto the desk. You are now sat on top of the cold wood, arms wrapped around his neck, as he continued to devour your lips. You slightly pull back in attempt to catch your breath. You’re a panting mess, and so is he. Hongjoong however doesn’t want to stop. He pecks your lips, before leaving a trail kisses from the corner of your mouth, to your soft cheek, and finally to your slender neck. Shivers were sent throughout your body as Hongjoong left soft warm kisses on your neck.
“A—ah Sir…” you whimpered quietly. Hongjoong hummed in response as he began to leave opened mouth kisses on your skin.
Hongjoong pushed your legs apart, your skirt already slightly hiked up from him placing you on the desk moments ago. Revealing your exposed thighs, Hongjoong’s hands moved from knees, and traveled up your soft plush thighs, causing you to close them in an instinct, but his strong arms prevent you, keeping them open.
His lips trails up to your ear nibbles on your lobe before whispering softly, “I want you to say my name okay?” You nod in response.
His hands moved dangerously closer to your heat that was radiating from your exposed thighs, but he stops, he was teasing you. His hands caressed your inner thighs, not daring to move closer as he continued to kiss your neck and face. His lips found his way back to yours and takes it in softly.
You whimper against his mouth and he slowly pulls away.
“What’s wrong baby?” His voice is so soft, sending another heat wave down your body.
“Please… touch me, sir” you say sheepishly.
“I told you Y/N, I want you to say my name.” Hongjoong’s grip on your thighs tighten, causing you to whimper in pain and pleasure.
“H—Hongjoong…” your soft, angelic voice echoed in his ears as his name rolled off your tongue.
“Yeah baby?” He tries to hold back a groan, already so turned on by you calling his name.
“Hongjoong, touch me… please?” You plead with your doe eyes staring at him. Hongjoong bites his lip as he looks at your pretty, desperate face.
“Fuck, Y/N… you make me do stupid shit” He curses under his breath before devouring your lips once again.
This time, his hands finally touch your warm clothed pussy. You moan at his touch. His fingers slowly rub against your clit, creating a friction against the fabric of your underwear. Instinctively, you wrap your arms around his neck tighter. Moaning into his lips as he continues to rub you.
Unexpectedly, tears began to well up in the corner of your eyes. Not in pain, not in discomfort, but in a frustrating pleasure.
“Hong—j-joong, stop teasing please” You whimper as he slightly pulls away. He looks at your face, tears slowly falling down. He smirks, “Mm such a dirty brat, crying for me…” He degrades you in a low tone.
His hands find the hem of your underwear, and he skillfully pulls them down. They rest at the ankles of your legs, stopped by your heels that restricted them from falling to the floor. Hongjoong’s left arm cradles your back, as his right hand pushes up your skirt more to reveal your bare wet pussy.
“Fuck… so wet already just from me kissing you, and barely touching you?” He teases you, even though he too is already so rock hard in his slacks, from just kissing and touching you.
His hand makes his way to your clit. The soft bud of his middle and ring finger gently rubs circles, causing you to hold back a moan. Skillfully, his fingers dip down to your entrance, not fully going inside you, just enough to collect your wet fluids, and bring them back up to your clit. He rubs it again, slowly picking up the pace.
Your right hand drops behind you as it land on the desk, supporting your weight. You slightly throw your head back and cover your mouth with your unoccupied arm trying to hide your moans.
“Let me fucken hear you moan baby. No one is here. Just you and me” Hongjoong groans in your ear. His voice turned you on so much, resulting in a soft moan slipping from your lips.
Hongjoong’s fingers make their way to your entrance. Slipping in your tight folds. You gasp and grab onto his shoulder. He pumps his fingers slowly, as he studies your facial expressions. Your eyes are sparkling from the previous tears you shed. Your glossy lips slightly parted as you released soft moans.
“So fucken pretty” Hongjoong moans as he leans down to kiss your forehead. The gentle gesture, mixed with his lewd actions makes your stomach turn in a good way. He begins to pick up the pace. The office room is silent, with only the sounds of your mixed moans, pants, and the wetness of your folds fapping against Hongjoong’s hand.
Your mind begins to get fuzzy as you feel an orgasm near by. Hongjoong feels your pussy tighten around his digits, he chuckles before he slowly pulls his fingers out of you. You whine in protest, frustration builds up in you, you were so close. Your arm around his neck tugs him closer, reaching for his lips, wanting to feel some sort of physical contact. But he pulls away from you. Completely. He steps back and looks at your figure.
You furrow your eyebrows in confusion, an unsettling knot tightening in your stomach. Why did he stop? Just moments ago, the air had felt charged with lust, and now it hung heavy with an unspoken tension. A flood of negative thoughts surged through your mind, drowning out any remnants of clarity. Embarrassment crept in, a heat rising to your cheeks, making you feel exposed and vulnerable. Guilt wrapped around you like a heavy cloak, its weight almost suffocating. You could feel the sting of tears pooling in your eyes, the familiar ache of despair threatening to spill over. In a swift, instinctive motion, you cast your gaze downward, as if to shield yourself from the world around you. Your heart raced as quiet whimpers escaped your lips.
Hongjoong watches you as you softly cry. He tries not to loose his composure. The cute look of confusion on your face makes him feral.
“Aww baby… why are you crying hm?” Hongjoong’s voice is raspy. He tilts his head, trying to get a good look at your flushed face. You can’t find yourself to respond, only sniffles and soft whimpers can be heard.
“You know… to be completely honest Y/N…” the sound of Hongjoong’s belt unbuckling fills the air. You glance at him with your doe eyes.
“When I told you… I don’t want to see you cry anymore…” He slings his belt off his pants and drops it to the floor. His hands moving towards the button of his slacks. He shifts towards your body, and leans close to your face.
“I actually meant… I don’t want to see you cry for anyone else but me.” Your eyes widen at his statement. He chuckles at your expression and grabs your hands. He brings them towards his hard mound covered by the soft fabric of his pants.
“You look so fucken pretty when you cry. It turns me on so much. Knowing that you feel so good, you can’t help but shed a few tears” He moans as you begin to instinctively rub your hands on his huge hard on.
“Help me out baby. Be a good girl” Hongjoong whispers to you, and you nod. He smiles at your response. You make your way off the desk, and position yourself on your knees. You slowly unzip Hongjoong’s pants and pull them down along with his trousers. His hard, long cock springs out and softly hits your face. You gasp at the sudden sight. Earning a chuckle from him.
“Open your mouth.” He demands softly. Your lips part, tongue slightly sticking out, as you take Hongjoong’s length in. He releases a loud groan. Cursing under his breath as you begin to slowly bob your head up and down. You twirl your tongue a few times over his tip, causing him to tightly grip onto your soft hair.
“F—Fuck baby…” Hongjoong throws his head back.
“… damn, your boyfriend is this lucky and can’t even fucken appreciate you” You freeze at the sudden statement, and Hongjoong smirks as he scoffs. In response, he begins to thrust into your mouth slowly. You moan on his cock as he begins to shove himself deeper into your mouth. You tap Hongjoong’s leg, and he pulls you off him instantly. You gasp for air, a string of saliva connecting from your lip to his cock, as you begin to cough. Hongjoong chuckles, caressing your hair.
“Stand up” He demands. And in an instant you’re on your feet. Hongjoong swiftly lifts you up and places you back onto the desk. His hands are hastily unbuttoning your blouse as he kisses your lips. You moan, furrowing your brows, still thinking about the humiliating statement Hongjoong said. Something about his touch is so intoxicating, making you want more. Making you not care about anything in your reality.
As Hongjoong releases the last button on your blouse, he quickly pushes your shirt off, revealing your black lacy bra filled by your perfect plush breasts. His hands grace over your chest, sending shivers down your spine. He kisses the exposed skin of your breast. His hands moving towards the straps, as he pulls them off. He reaches behind you and skillfully releases the clasps of your bra. The black lace drops swiftly revealing your perfect boobs.
“So fucken perfect for me baby.” Hongjoong whispers as he gropes them with his hands. You moan at his touch. He takes one in his mouth and laps at your nipples, resulting in you throwing your head back in pleasure.
“H—Hongjoong” you moan his name, he hums in response, still working on your breasts.
“Want.. m—more” you stutter under his touch.
He pulls away from you and pants, trying to calm himself down.
“Want more what?” He cocks an eyebrow at you. You pout, too embarrassed to verbally say what you want from him.
“Tell me now, or I’ll leave you here” Hongjoong threatens as he begins to pump himself, already knowing what you want. But he still wants to hear the words from your mouth.
“I want… you inside me… please?” You whimper in embarrassment. You look at him and you see a spark of excitement in his eyes as he smirks at you.
“Atta girl. Wasn’t so hard to say right?” He teases you as he brings himself closer to your pussy. Your breath increases as he places his tip right at the entrance. He only inserts his head before pulling out, repeating the gesture a few times. You whine as a tear falls from your eyes.
“Quit being a fucken brat” Hongjoong hisses at you bringing a gentle hand to your face as he wipes the tear away. Finally, He pushes his whole length inside you, earning a loud yelp from you. His cock instantly hits your sensitive spot and you cling onto his arms. He pauses inside of you, letting you adjust to his size. You’re definitely not used to his large length and thick girth, he’s stretching you out so good.
“Damn baby, you’re so tight? Your boyfriend isn’t big enough huh?” Hongjoong snickers at you. You whine at the sudden mention of your boyfriend again. It’s like he wants to remind you of him on purpose. To humiliate you. Hongjoong begins a slow pace inside you. Grunting as he moves against you.
“Answer me…” he demands, his hand cups your chin to force your gaze on him.
“H—he isn’t big enough. Y—you’re bigger Hongjoong…” You moan as he thrusts deeper.
“You… make me feel s—so good” You close your eyes as you take in the pleasure running through your body. Hongjoong manically smiles. Ecstatic at your response.
“Yeah?” He teases. Picking up his pace. The sound of your sweet moans heighten, the wet sounds of you two slapping against each other fill the room along with Hongjoong’s dirty words.
“Bet you, he doesn’t fuck you this good huh? Look at you. A fucken mess on my cock.”
“N-no! He doesn’t.” You whine, another wave of tears begin to fall from your eyes. The overstimulation of Hongjoong pumping into you along with his degrading words overwhelms you. You don’t want to admit it, but you fucken love this. Your body is enjoying every fucken moment of this dirty, lewd affair.
“F-Fuucckk” Hongjoong moans loudly. “Look at me while you cry, baby. Let me see that pretty face” you listen to him without hesitation. Your eyes locking with his. You feel yourself closer to reaching your high. Until you’re both interrupted with a sudden ringing.
You both turn your heads to the chair you sat on when you first entered Hongjoong’s office. The sight of your bright phone screen illuminates the dim room.
*Siwoo <3 is Calling*
Your heart drops at the name. Anxiety suddenly filling your body, replacing the pleasure you felt before. Hongjoong notices and smirks at you. He reaches over and grabs your phone.
“Answer it.” He demands. You shake your head no.
“I said fucken answer it. Your boyfriend is waiting for you. Don’t be a fucken brat now. Do you want me to stop?” Hongjoong’s words are harsh. You instantly shake your head in protest of him stopping.
“Then fucken answer it” Hongjoong shoves the phone towards you.
You hesitate as you grab the phone from his hands and click the green button. You bring the phone to your ear, but Hongjoong pulls your wrist, and clicks on the speaker button. He cocks his head at you, signaling you to continue,
“H-Hello? Siwoo?” You begin. Hongjoong resumes his pace. Fucking you in and out.
“Hey Honey. What are you doing?” Siwoo’s voice is calm, in contrast to what you’re feeling right now.
“A-Ah.. I’m j-just finishing up some w-work” You stutter as you try to keep your composure. Hongjoong makes it harder for you as he begins to lick your neck.
“You’re still at work?” Siwoo questions.
“M—mm, Yeah. Don’t worry. I—I’ll be home soon” You bite your lip trying to contain a moan.
“You okay Y/N? why do you keep stuttering?” Siwoo’s voices a concern.
“I—i’m okay. I-I just don’t feel too well. I think it’s a stomach tic” You bluff, trying to find an excuse.
“You don’t feel well? Shall I come pick you up from work-?” Siwoo suggests
“No!” You cut him off. You curse to yourself. Hongjoong smiles against a your neck and softly bites it as he continues fucking you senseless.
“Oh- okay then. Just be careful. take some medicine” You roll your eyes. (why the fuck does Siwoo decide to be sweet right now out of all days?) You mentally say to yourself.
“Y-yes I will…” You reply softly.
“Anyways, did you see my text? can you wire me some money?” Siwoo asks nonchalantly. You scoff, earning a vocalized chuckle from Hongjoong. Your eyes widen as you pull him closer to your neck, trying to muffle his laughter. You bite your lip, in hopes Siwoo didn’t hear anything.
“S—sorry, Siwoo. I don’t get paid till this Friday.” you manage to get out.
“Aww please? just a few bucks” Siwoo whines. In annoyance, you roll your eyes once again.
“Siwoo, I—I can’t. I have to go” You quickly hang up the call and throw your phone down. Hongjoong detaches from your neck and chuckles before attacking your lips. His pace begins to pick up. He holds onto your waist for support and you hold him closer. Hongjoong pulls away from your lips and rests his forehead against yours.
“Does he take care of you? or do you take care of him?” He teases as he tries to hold back a laugh.
“S—Shut up” You moan in response. Hongjoong thrusts hard into you, earning a loud yelp from you.
“Someone’s suddenly mouthy?” Hongjoong’s hand grips onto your chin as he lightly taps your cheek.
“F—Fuck” You moan as he shoves himself inside you, with long and deep strokes.
Hongjoong then suddenly pulls out of you. Not wanting to waste any time, he lifts you off the desk and flips you over. Your front is pushed onto the cold wood, and he pulls your hips higher. Your forearms hoist yourself for support as you feel Hongjoong enter you once again. His hands grip under your skirt pushing them up towards your waist, giving him a perfect view of your ass. He mentally curses to himself as he watches your butt bounce on his cock at a constant pace. He brings his hand down to caress it before raising it and bringing it back down in a hard, but pleasurable slap. You yelp in response, eyes widen at the sudden contact.
“Such a fucken naughty girl. Fucking your boss, when you have a boyfriend” Hongjoong degrades you as his hand makes contact with your ass again. You whimper at the stinging sensation. Your tears fall onto the papers infront of you.
“Who fucks you better baby?” Hongjoong pants as his speed increases. “Me or Siwoo? Hm?” He asks again taking you in deeper.
“A—Ahhhh~ You, Hongjoong.” You sniffle your tears , “Hongjoong fucks me better!” You scream as his pace becomes sloppy. Hongjoong hears your crying whimpers and quickly turns you around to face him. Your body now lays flat on his desk as he pumps into you.
“Yeah? bet I can be better lover than him too” Hongjoong confesses as he smashes his lips onto yours. Your heart clenches at his statement. A sudden wave of orgasm hits you. Your pussy tightens around him as you come undone. Your arms wrapped around his neck as you release a loud moan. Your face buried in his chest, as he continues to fuck you and chase his high. Hongjoong’s thrust become sloppy, and quickly pulls out of you.
“Let me cum on your pretty face” He hastily demands. You quickly move towards his lower body and he pumps himself quickly on you. Hongjoong looks at your sparkly doe eyes, and bites his lips. His warm thick load releases into your face, along with a loud grunt from his mouth. You gasp as the feeling of the strings of cum landing on your soft skin. Your mouth instinctively opens,
“F—Fuckkk baby” Hongjoong hisses as he continues to pump more of his load onto your tongue.
The office room is filled with the sounds of you and Hongjoong panting, trying to catch your breath. The room reeks of sex. Your eyes are still locked on his. His white cum painted on your face and mouth. Without any other choice, you close your mouth and swallow his bittersweet cum.
“Fuck” Hongjoong whispers under his breath. He caresses your hair and reaches over his desk to grab a few tissue papers. Hongjoong wipes your face gently and kisses your forehead.
"Let me clean you up down there,"
Hongjoong whispered, his voice a soft, intimate murmur that seemed to linger in
the air between you. The earlier intensity of steamy sex had left a palpable tension, but now, a gentle calm enveloped the room. His eyes, once aflame with desire, were now filled with a warmth that reassured you, reminding you of the caring side he often showed.
After the whirlwind of passion, Hongjoong's demeanor had transformed completely. The fire that had ignited between you both settled into a tender glow as he moved closer, his presence both comforting and protective. With a steady hand, he reached for another tissue, his fingers brushing your skin lightly as he began to clean you up. The touch was careful and deliberate, as if he were trying to convey his affection through each gentle motion.
You felt a mix of vulnerability and warmth wash over you, grateful for the way he approached this moment. It was as though he understood the importance of transitioning from the intensity of physical connection to something more nurturing and intimate. You appreciated how he took his time, ensuring that you felt cared for, both emotionally and physically. As you two began to help each other back into your clothing, you couldn’t ignore the lingering feelings.
“I’ll take you home” Hongjoong smiles gently at you and brushes a strand of your hair out of your face. You nod and follow behind him out of his office. As he approached your desk, Hongjoong gathered your bags. You instinctively reached out to grab them, but he gently shook his head, a soft smile playing on his lips.
“Let me handle this,” he said, his voice warm and reassuring. With that, he took the lead, guiding you toward his car.
As you followed behind, your legs felt wobbly, you could sense him glancing back occasionally, ensuring you were still keeping up.
At the car, he paused, opening the passenger door, gesturing for you to get in. You slid into the seat. He placed your bags in the back with care, then turned to you, his demeanor softening as he reached for his spare coat. With a fluid motion, he draped it over your shoulders, its warmth enveloping you like a comforting hug.
“Hongjoong—” you started, the silence stretching between you, but he raised a hand to quiet you.
“Shh, it’s okay, Y/N. You don’t have to say anything. Just rest,” he said gently. He leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to your forehead.
The drive home was silent. The hum of the engine a lullaby in the stillness of the night. You fought to keep your eyes open, fatigue clawing at you, but each passing moment, tried to invite you to surrender to the drowsiness. Suddenly, the car came to a stop, signaling at you from your drowsy haze. You turned to look at Hongjoong, who was already gazing at you.
“Y/N…” Hongjoong’s voice was barely above a whisper, yet it carried an undeniable weight. “I meant what I said when I told you I can be a better lover than Siwoo.” The sincerity in his tone sent a shiver down your spine. “He doesn’t treat you well. You deserve someone who truly values you.” His eyes held a raw intensity as he continued, “I don’t think I can go on without you knowing that I’ve always wanted you for myself.”
His sudden confession took you by surprise, leaving you momentarily speechless. The air around you felt charged, and you could hardly process the emotions swirling within you.
“Let me prove to you that I will love you better. Please, Y/N,” he urged, his gaze earnest and imploring. The vulnerability he displayed was a stark contrast to what he portrayed in the office just moments ago. This was a side of him that revealed his deep feelings, and it struck a chord within you.
Your heart raced as you absorbed his words, the truth of them resonating deep inside. You had long felt the magnetic pull toward him, the warmth in his presence that made you feel seen in a way Siwoo never had. You realized in that moment that you, too, wanted to love him—fully and unreservedly.
Compelled by a rush of emotion, you leaned in closer, the space between you evaporating. Your lips met his in a tender kiss, a hesitant exploration that quickly deepened as he responded. His hands found their way to your face, cradling it gently as he pulled you in, his touch igniting a warmth that spread through your entire being.
“Fuck- if you kiss me like that I might take you right here again” Hongjoong chuckles against your lips. And you giggle in response. However, his expression falls down.
“Y/N… I should tell you that Siwoo has been cheating on you.” Hongjoong sighs as he rests his forehead against yours.
“Who’s Siwoo?” You joke trying to mask your disappointment of him mentioning your now ex. “Y/N, I know I initiated an affair while you are dating him too but, you needed to know.” Hongjoong states in a serious tone.
“I know, Hongjoong.” You say softly. “I figured after our conversation we had on Friday, when he came over to my house the next day. I guess my naive self chose to ignore it… I messaged him earlier when we got to the car that I’m over with him. I’m no longer his.” You look at Hongjoong as he studies your face.
“So… does this mean you’re mine?” Hongjoong raises an eyebrow. You softly smile and shrug your shoulders. Hongjoong smirks at you and in an instant unbuckles his seat belt and exits the car. He makes his way to the passenger door and opens it. Swiftly, he lifts your body and throws you over his shoulder. You yelp in response and he carries you towards his house.
“You drove us to your house?!” You exclaim as you giggle over his shoulder.
“Let me remind you again who you really belong to” Hongjoong chuckles as he playfully slaps your ass and quickly makes his way through the doors of his home.
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Pt. 2 (updated 10/21)
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Author’s commentary: Should I do a sequel? 👀. I had way more ideas for this story but decided to cut it short LOLLL. Anyways, I hope yall enjoy😝 feel free to fangirl in my comment section/ ask box🤭.
2K notes · View notes
starkwlkr · 8 months ago
Note
Can I request some hung with old man Logan? Something domestic or soemthing like reader baking for him. I love reading fics of Logan and reader being an old married couple
just the two of us | old man logan
an: anon ily for this request old man Logan needs more love <3 credit to pinterest for the gif btw this doesn’t follow the logan storyline so i added laura hope that’s ok!! sorry if there’s an spelling mistakes!
reader and logan live in a nice little cozy home because i said so 😍
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“Taste.” You held the wooden spoon up to your husband’s mouth. Logan sighed, he knew you weren’t going to let him walk away without tasting the brownie batter so he licked the spoon.
For a while you had been craving brownies. While Logan was out working, you and Laura drove to the city to pick up the ingredients to make brownies. It was a fun small girls trip until it was time to come back home. Laura had helped you mix everything together until she got tired, she then decided to go up to her room to watch cartoons. You continued working on the brownies by yourself, that’s when Logan had arrived from work and now here you were giving him a taste test.
“So?” You waited for an answer.
“Bub, you are the best baker in this whole town, city, state, planet.” Logan was going to dip his finger in the batter until you slapped it away.
“No! You’re going to wait like the rest of us, but I did tell Laura she could have the first brownie so just wait.” You told him.
Logan groaned and walked to the kitchen sink and washed his hands. “How was your day?”
Logan always asked about you day. It didn’t matter if you stayed home and read a book or did some gardening, he wanted to know.
“Good. Laura and I read a new book, we went to buy ingredients to make brownies and now my old man is home so I’d say it’s been a pretty good day.” You started to pour the brownie batter into a pan.
He didn’t mind you calling him old man, in fact, he loved it. Yeah, he wasn’t as young as he used to be, but you still loved him. You did admit to him many times that the grey hair was a turn on for you, which made him laugh.
Before you could react, Logan quickly dipped his finger in the batter and licked it clean.
“James! Don’t you dare do it again!” You scolded him. “These are for Laura too.”
“Come on, Laura’s not going to know that I ate some batter,” Logan leaned on the counter next to you. “I’ve been thinking. .”
“Oh no, that’s concerning.” You teased, finishing up with the brownies and putting them in the oven. You turned to face him then wrap your arms around him, bring him closer to you.
Logan chuckled at your response. “I’ve been thinking about taking you and Laura to some place nice. We can do that family shit you always talk about.”
You laugh at his choice of words. “Family shit, yeah that’s what I said.”
“Tomorrow then, I’ll drive us to the nicest place you’ve ever seen, get some ice cream, watch a movie, whatever you want.” Logan leaned in closer, you doing the same.
Before your lips could touch, Laura interrupted you asking about the brownies.
“Not yet, my love, I just put them in. I’ll call you when they’re done,” You pulled away making Logan groan. Laura nodded then ran up to her room. You noticed the frown on his face so you quickly gave him his after work kiss. “Don’t be so sad, old man, the neighbor’s kid wants to have a sleepover with Laura this weekend so it’ll just be the two of us.” Logan definitely liked the sound of that.
Half an hour later, the brownies were ready. Laura took several with her to her room while you and Logan took a plate outside to the patio where your porch swing was. It was a beautiful evening, it wasn’t too hot or too cold, and now you were ending the night beside your husband eating some homemade brownies.
“I think Laura is going to ask you for a dog.” You mention, scooting closer to Logan and laying your head on his chest. You held a brownie up to him so he could take a bite.
“No, we are not getting a dog.” He said.
“It would be nice, you know . . .” You bit the brownie after Logan.
“Is this why you made brownies? You want me to get you and Laura a dog?” He looked down at you.
“No, but can you?”
He sighed defeatedly. “I’ll think about it.”
2K notes · View notes
rafedarling · 4 months ago
Note
I know Drew and his wife are champ when it comes to parenting Rustyn. However, I love to imagine the first month with Rustyn, when he cried all night and Drew and his wife had no idea why he was crying. When the doctor told them that the reason he cried was because he was having colic, his wife felt very sad and angry to herself for not knowing earlier that her baby was in pain 🥹
since my request are closed. i planning to make it a bit more like a drabble. enjoy!!
COLIC
It’s 2:33 a.m. when you heard Rustyn’s cries. You groaned softly, starting to rise, but Drew’s hand gently stopped you.
“I’ll get him,” he mumbled, still half-asleep.
A moment later, Drew handed Rustyn to you. You tried feeding him, but he wasn’t hungry. His diaper was clean, and rocking him back and forth didn’t seem to help either. None of it work. His cries were different tonight urgent and constant.
“Something’s wrong,” you whispered, your voice heavy with worry.
Drew rubbed his face, trying to stay calm.
“We’re figuring this out, babe. Let’s take him to the doctor tomorrow, okay? He’ll be fine.”
You nodded, reluctantly letting Drew take Rustyn to rock him back to sleep.
The next morning, you and Drew sat anxiously in the doctor’s office. After a thorough examination, the doctor smiled kindly.
“Rustyn has colic,” she explained.
“It’s common and not dangerous, but it can be uncomfortable. His digestive system is still developing, and that’s likely causing the crying spells.”
Your heart sank.
“He’s been in pain, and I didn’t realize,” you said, tears filling your eyes.
The doctor’s reassuring smile didn’t quite reach you. Drew immediately took your hand, his grip firm.
“Y/N, stop blaming yourself,” he said gently.
“We’re learning. Rustyn’s okay, and we’re doing our best.”
The doctor gave you tips to burping him more often, using anti-colic bottles, and soothing techniques which you eagerly absorbed.
Back home, you felt the guilt creeping in again as Rustyn fussed in Drew’s arms.
“I should’ve known,” you said softly.
“He was in pain, and I didn’t do anything.”
Drew crossed the room, sitting beside you.
“You’re an amazing mom,” he said firmly.
“No one expects us to know everything. We’re figuring this out together.”
That night, Rustyn cried again, but with the doctor’s advice in mind, you and Drew worked together. It didn’t stop the crying completely, but you felt more confident and less alone.
As Drew rocked Rustyn to sleep, he whispered to you, “We’ve got this, babe. We’re his parents. And there’s nothing we can’t handle together.”
You smiled through the exhaustion, finally believing it.
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seungkw1 · 5 months ago
Text
ring my bell  — ljh
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♡ pairing: neighbor!jihoon x afab!reader ♡ theme: smut [18+ mdni] ♡ wc: 7k ♡ warnings: sub!reader, but also subby!jihoon, size kink, praise kink, auralism/ecouteurism, masturbation (m. & f.), oral (m. & f. receiving), unprotected piv sex (do not do this), cum swallowing, creampie, cockwarming, dacryphilia, size kink, hair pulling, gagging, missionary, 69, nipple play/boob worship, multiple orgasms, sex toys, mild alcohol consumption, did i mention size kink, lil fluff at the end ♡ a/n: i abandoned this fic at least five times lmao but then one night at like 2am the brain rot took over and here we are! tysm to @wonwovy for beta reading, @shinysobi for the title suggestion, and @miniseokminnies for help w the photos <3
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When you moved into your new condo, you were pretty sure you hit the jackpot. At first, you were a bit suspicious - how could the rent be so low in this part of town, with such a nice building? But for two months after you moved in, you’ve had no problems. Sure, the shower head is a bit leaky sometimes, and you could use a bit more storage space, but overall - no complaints. As an added bonus the unit next to you was vacant - aka, peace and quiet. Perfection. 
That vacancy didn't last forever, though. Two months in, and you found yourself with a new neighbor. You haven't had a chance to properly introduce yourself to him yet, but from the brief glimpses of him you've gotten he seems nice. You suspect he's around your age, a bit quiet, definitely keeps to himself but has been very polite in passing. And while he's not exactly your type, you do admit he is pretty cute. So, nothing wrong with him. 
You did, however, quickly discover two major problems. One, it turns out the walls are paper fucking thin. And two - to make matters worse - his bedroom is apparently right on the other side of yours, sharing a wall. And you can hear everything. 
By the sounds of it, the guy is single. You never hear any other voices, just his - soft moans emanating through the sad excuse for a wall, gradually getting louder, culminating in a symphony of unholy noises. You've never heard a man be so… vocal before. 
At first, you just try to ignore it. Obviously, he's doing nothing wrong - this is simply a consequence of shared living spaces. So you do your best to mind your business. 
Easier said than done. 
A week passes. You still haven't had a chance to actually say hi to your new neighbor, but you already feel like you've become intimately acquainted with him. It feels a bit… wrong. This is very clearly a one-sided situation. You don't even know the guy’s name for fuck’s sake. Yet, each time, a sharp aching sensation forms a pit in your stomach. You find yourself fantasizing about him -  wishing you could be on the other side of the wall, wishing you were the one responsible for the sounds being produced. 
You've gone and fallen for a complete stranger - or at least, the idea of him. Fucking great. 
You just need to actually meet him, you tell yourself. He could be a complete asshole. Or maybe just not your type at all. Once you say hi, you'll get over this silly little fantasy in no time. 
I’ll make sure to run into him tomorrow, you determine. You go to bed, content with your plan. 
Not five minutes after you crawl under the covers, you start to hear faint groans. 
You reach for your airpods, but they're not on your nightstand. You must have left them in the other room. 
It’s fine, you decide. It’ll be over soon enough. 
But tonight, apparently, he is taking his sweet time. 
You stuff your head under the pillows, trying to drown out the sensual sounds, but the moaning persists. Even muffled it’s loud - and it only gets worse as the minutes pass. 
Just when you think he’s about to finish, the sounds cease. Thank god, you think as you roll over, ready to finally get some sleep. 
But a minute later he starts up again. Slowly at first, once again taking his time, increasing his speed at an excruciatingly slow pace. Eventually his breaths grow shorter, his groaning louder. Then, he stops. 
As if he set out to torment you tonight, he begins once more.  
You lay there, eyes closed, unmoving, breathing deeply, trying to ignore the aching between your legs. But it's impossible. 
The third time around, he's clearly very on edge. His moans turn loud, whiny, pathetic. It's probably the hottest thing you've ever heard. 
Don’t do it don't do it don't do it…
As if your arm has gained a mind of its own, your hand slides beneath the fabric of your underwear. You gasp as your fingers slip between your folds - you're fucking wet. 
Your already-throbbing bud pulsates between your fingers. Slowly, you begin to rub your clit. The sensation is immediately overwhelming; the uninhibited cries of pleasure emanating from the other side of the wall are enough to send you over the edge. Just when you think you can't take another moment of this, he cums. And so do you. 
Your free hand clasps over your mouth just in time. You try as hard as you possibly can to stay silent - but you want to scream. You writhe against the sheets to the sound of his release, riding out your orgasm on your fingertips. Muffled cries escape despite your efforts - but are lost amidst the man’s sea of moans. You cum long and hard, savoring every last moment of your high. 
As you start to come down, you sink into your mattress, body spent, mind drifting off. Your neighbor seems to have exhausted himself too - the only sounds carrying through the wall now being that of deep breaths. 
So much for running into him tomorrow. 
You flop over onto your side, shoving the thought away - but you know even if you try, you can't avoid him forever. 
You just pray to god he didn't hear you. 
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Of course, after a week without any encounters, you manage to run into him the very next day. 
Upon returning from the grocery store, you head to your building’s elevator. The doors are closing as you approach, so you figure you'll just take the next one - but the occupant holds the door for you. 
“Thank you,” you say cheerfully, but as you step inside your stomach drops. You are face to face with your new neighbor.
“You’re welcome,” he replies, making direct eye contact with you. You want to disappear into the walls, but you maintain your composure. The button for your floor is already lit up, so he presses the close door button. 
“I believe I just moved into the unit next to yours,” he says as you set your heavy bags on the floor. “I've seen you around but haven't had a chance to introduce myself. I’m Jihoon.”
He extends his hand out to you. You instantly regret setting your bags down. 
You smile calmly, hoping he doesn't notice how flustered you are. But as you slide your hand into his, your heart rate rises. It doesn't help that he has really nice hands - large, warm, with fingers long and graceful, and a nice strong grip against your own hand. Your mind flashes back to the events of last night, picturing what those hands were doing…
Stop it. 
“I’m y/n,” you reply with a smile, trying to be as normal as possible. “Nice to meet you.”
You withdraw your hand from his grasp as he lets go - nonchalantly, but with haste. Any longer and your palms would have probably started sweating. 
“So, how are you liking it here so far?” you ask casually. 
“So far so good,” he replies. “I'm honestly surprised that I was able to find anything in this part of town for such a good deal. Nice and quiet here too.”
Quiet. 
You fear your suspicions are correct: he has no idea he's been putting on a nightly show for you. 
The elevator gives a soft ding as it comes to a stop. You reach down to grab your bags as the door opens. 
“Can I help you with that?” 
“Oh, uh… sure.”
He picks up the heavy bags with ease. You could tell that he’s a muscular guy, but up close he looks straight up beefy. It doesn't help that the tight shirt he's wearing hugs all his muscles perfectly, his biceps nearly bursting out of his sleeves. You force yourself to look away before you start fucking drooling. 
He delivers the bags to your front door. He returns them to you with care, making sure you have a firm grip on the handles before letting go. His hand lingers upon yours momentarily - the lightest brush of his fingertips against yours enough for your insides to do a somersault. 
“Thanks again,” you tell him, making the mistake of direct eye contact again. 
“Of course,” Jihoon replies warmly. “See you around.”
You flash him a smile, perhaps a bit too enthusiastically. “Bye!!” you blurt abruptly as you unlock your front door, hurrying inside. You want to turn around, get one more good look at him - but you shut the door behind you. 
Your head spins as you put your groceries away. You're so wrapped up in your imagination that you nearly put the milk in the cabinet. But you can't stop daydreaming about what those muscles look like underneath his shirt. 
You finish up and head into your bedroom. A nice hot shower should clear your mind. Not two seconds after taking off your shirt, you freeze. The familiar sounds from next door have begun yet again. 
You stand there, half horrified, half horny. Surely it's nothing more than coincidence that your neighbor got home and started jacking off minutes after having a conversation with you. He was probably gonna do that anyway, you try to convince yourself. You're just having main character syndrome right now, this has nothing to do with you. 
But your gut is telling you otherwise. 
Mindlessly your fingers drift to your bra clasp, removing the garment. Taking your breast in one hand you stroke your thumb over your nipple, already hard from sudden exposure to the cool air of your room. You let yourself stand there for a minute, listening to Jihoon’s soft moans, imagining you could see him through the wall, slowly stroking his cock in his hands. 
You feel guilty, ashamed, but the aching in your cunt overpowers any sense of remorse. Your hand makes its way into your pants, your fingers gliding through your folds, slipping easily into your soaked pussy. You wince silently, stifling the moans desperately trying to escape you. Slowly, you begin to fuck yourself. You can't help but think about how it would feel if it were Jihoon’s fingers inside you instead. 
You stand there for a couple minutes, your clit throbbing against the motion of your palm - threatening to make you scream and cum. 
You can't let him hear you, you keep telling yourself. But part of you almost wants him to hear you. You picture him getting so turned on hearing your cries of pleasure that he cums instantly, all over himself, making a huge mess that you would love nothing more than to help clean up. 
You feel your climax rapidly approaching. You cease moving your fingers, but let them remain resting inside you. You try to calm yourself down, taking deep breaths to slow your pounding heart, but just as your head starts to clear you hear a sudden swell of orgasmic sounds from through the wall. As if by reflex your hand moves again. Your body tremors at the pressure against your overstimulated clit - you cum in silence, forcing your cries back inside you as . You ride out your high, and so does Jihoon, his moans slowly softening as he comes back down. 
Heart pounding, you slowly remove your fingers from your cunt. Your hand is soaked; you find yourself wishing it was Jihoon's face instead, glistening with your juices after eating you out, making you cum an unreasonable amount of times. 
You sigh. You know this should all feel wrong. But why does it feel so good then?
A strange combination of feelings overtake your body: tingling bliss from your orgasm, guilt from the reason for your orgasm, an overpowering yearning for the touch of essentially an entire stranger. 
You strip the remainder of your clothes off and proceed to take a very long, very hot shower. 
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You wake up the next morning stupidly horny.
It didn’t help that you had a dream about Jihoon. In it, you were standing in his bedroom, watching him masturbate to the sight of you. His cries echoing through your subconscious, the pathetic look on this face as he came all over himself - it’s not surprising you woke up to a puddle between your legs.
You pause, listening to see if you can hear your neighbor next door, but you hear nothing. You reach into your nightstand, pulling out your favorite vibrator. The purple device rumbles in your hand as you turn it on. For a vibrator, it’s pretty quiet, but with your stupid thin walls you know it would be perfectly audible from the other side. You think Jihoon isn’t around - surely you would hear him if he were - but even if he is, you truly don’t even care anymore. You position the toy lightly upon your clit - even through the fabric of your underwear, its powerful vibrations instantly feel amazing. A soft groan escapes your lips before you can stop it. Your hips begin to move lightly at the stimulation - the pressure of the vibrator’s end causing your wetness to stick to your panties. You attempt to restrain your moaning, but before long you cease resisting. It feels too good. Your orgasm quickly builds in your gut, making you whimper as you squirm against your pillow, its intensity growing and growing until - you cum. The fire of your release burns through your body, your cries filling the air without abandon. Deep breaths fill your lungs as you come down, soft gasps emanating from your lips as you turn the toy off and toss it aside. 
A series of thunks echo from through the wall, followed by a hushed “shit”.
It sounds like somebody dropping a phone or something, but whatever it is - turns out your neighbor was home after all. Whoops.
In your post-orgasm bliss you begin to drift back to sleep. You don’t know what you’re going to do now next time you run into Jihoon, but that’s a problem for later.
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You end up sleeping in far too late. By the time you wake up, you feel groggy and sluggish, so you figure going to the gym will help you feel a little better. You don a soft pink pair of leggings and a light gray sports bra, filling your water bottle and grabbing your airpods on your way out the door. You wait in the hallway for the elevator. It reaches your floor with a ding, its doors sliding open to reveal who other than your next door neighbor. 
Of fucking course.
He appears to be returning from the gym, his tight white t-shirt clinging to his body in a way that practically puts all his muscles on display. His dark hair is damp and sweaty, messy, stray strands of it sticking to his forehead. He looks up to see you standing there, a panicked look instantly filling his eyes. His skin is already flush from exercising, but his ears turn practically crimson at the sight of you. 
“Hi,” you say with a friendly smile.
He freezes, staring at you like a deer caught in the headlights. He quickly tries to shake it off.
“Oh, uh, hey,” he mumbles in an attempted nonchalant tone, but already his cheeks are becoming more flustered. You see his eyes flicker up and down your body - your outfit isn’t terribly revealing, but it’s certainly on the sexier side of athleticwear. He stands there, awkwardly frozen - so long that the elevator door begins to shut again. He grabs hold of it, triggering the motion sensor so it reopens. He starts to shuffle past you, but you decide you’re feeling bold enough to try and engage him in a conversation.
“Just coming back from the gym?” you ask casually.
He stops in the hallway, standing right before you.
“Oh, yeah.”
“Do you also go to the one over on Clark Street?” you question. You won’t hold him up too long - he looks like he wants to perish - but you figure you’ll torment him for another minute or so.  “That’s where I’m headed now.”
“Yeah, I do,” he answers, subtly shifting his gym bag in front of his body. 
“Cool! Maybe we’ll see each other there sometime,” you tell him in a chipper tone. 
“Maybe, yeah. That’d be cool,” he replies, smiling nervously.
You enter the elevator and press the ground floor button.
“Well, see ya around!” you tell him with a wave.
“You too,” he responds, not taking his eyes off you until the elevator door shuts closed.
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Three days pass - three days of pure silence from the other side of the wall. 
Now that Jihoon has discovered the truth, he's clearly mortified. You catch a few glimpses of him around the building, but the man practically vanishes at the sight of you. You feel a little bit bad, but you know the ruse could not have lasted forever anyway. 
Unless he somehow knows exactly when you're not home and has been jacking off exclusively then, you haven't heard him pull his dick out at all. And judging by the couple times you've seen him, the man has been incredibly on edge. 
You return home a bit late in the evening after hanging out with some friends. You’ve had a fair bit of wine, so you're feeling a little tipsy, but you're in a pleasantly good mood. You're also decently horny; your mind drifts to your neighbor, conjuring up the image of him returning from the gym, sweaty, muscular, his t-shirt damp and tightly fitted against his sculpted body. 
Not two minutes pass after you step inside before you hear the SLAM of a door from the hallway. Footsteps approach your unit, followed by frantic knocking on your front door. 
You scurry over to the entrance, reaching out to unlock the door, but the pit in your stomach makes you pause. What if he’s mad at you? you start to worry. 
Well, only one way to find out. 
With the click the deadbolt turns. You swing the door open to reveal Jihoon, in a plain white t-shirt and grey fucking sweatpants. 
He stares at you, standing frozen in your doorway. You can see the gears turning in his head, trying to calculate if this is all a mistake. 
After just enough moments of silence for it to be awkward, he clears his throat. 
“Hi, um… May I come in?”
He looks incredibly tense, but the way he's staring at you with such intensity makes your pussy ache. 
“Sure.”
You step aside, gesturing for him to come in. 
He enters. He takes a look around as you shut the door behind him. 
“It's really nice in here,” he comments, attempting to make small talk. 
“Oh, thank you,” you say with a friendly smile. He looks even more nervous now that he's in your apartment. He pauses, nonchalantly observing some of the artwork on your wall, seemingly trying (and failing) to come up with a good segue into whatever he came over here to say. 
“So, um…” he starts, rubbing his hands together anxiously. 
“I just wanted to… uh… well, I figured I should probably let you know…” 
You inch even closer to him as he stumbles over his words; his shoulders tense slightly. He runs one hand through his hair, avoiding your gaze. 
“I guess I just wanted to apologize,” he finally is able to articulate. “I just recently realized that the walls in this building are pretty thin and uh… well I guess I don’t know if I've been loud at all…” 
Blushed redness creeps up his neck as his terrible lying resonates through the room. 
Maybe it's the way he's standing there, doing nothing but stumbling over his words yet looking incredibly sexy, or maybe it's the wine - but you're feeling bold today. 
“Yeah, you have been.”
The pale color of his cheeks suddenly goes even paler, turning his entire face sheet-white as he stands there, horrified. Then, the redness returns with a vengeance. He looks like a very hot, very nervous tomato. 
“I’m so sorry,” he stammers, “I really had no idea-”
“Why are you apologizing?”
He stares at you, confused. 
“Um…”
He waits for you to clarify, but you don't. Seeing him this flustered up close and personal has your panties soaked already, and you want to revel in it. 
He lets out a deep sigh. 
“I just… I know I can be loud sometimes, but from now on I’ll be more conscientious of my… volume. And I just don't want you to think I’m perverted or anything…”
He shakes his head, realizing he's just digging himself a deeper hole at this point. 
“Anyway, I’m really sorry to bother you, I should get going-”
He tries to slip past you, but you throw your arm out in front of him, slamming your palm into the wall of the narrow hallway as you block him from exiting. He freezes, involuntarily holding his breath as panic spreads across his face. 
“What if I like it?”
Your arm brushes against his torso, his chest heaving into you with his quickening breaths. 
“What?” he asks, barely more than a whisper, clearly taken aback by your question. 
“What if I like hearing you?”
His eyes widen. You step even closer into his personal space, your face now mere inches from his. 
“What if I want to hear you making those noises on this side of the wall, in my bed?”
You grasp onto his t-shirt, yanking his body into yours. He lets out a gasp as your tits press into his chest - his mouth is now so close to yours that you feel the exhale against your lips. 
“Would you like that?”
He gazes at you, his eyes darkening with desire. Then - he kisses you. 
It's not a delicate kiss, nor is it sweet. He kisses you as if he intends to devour you, hungrily tugging at your lips as he grasps at your waist fervorously, aching to touch every inch of you. 
His large hands slip underneath your shirt, gripping your sides tight as he caresses your warm skin. Your heart races in your chest, the sounds of rushing blood flooding your ears as you kiss Jihoon, savoring the sweet taste of his lips, basking in the radiant heat of his body against yours. 
“Oh wow,” he mutters into your mouth as his lips depart yours briefly. 
You grasp onto his tshirt, balling the fabric in your fists, pulling him with you as you stumble toward your bedroom together, still kissing him. 
As you step through the doorway, you tug on his shirt, prompting him to remove it. He pauses, contemplating the taste of wine lingering on your lips.
“Are you… drunk?” he asks delicately. “I just want to make sure…”
“A little,” you reply, leaning into him, so close that the vibrations of your soft-spoken words resonate against his lips.
“But I know what I want.”
Jihoon squeezes the flesh of your hips, his grip unrelentless, as if someone was going to take you away from him. A thick bulge beneath his sweatpants presses against you as he holds you tightly against him.
“And what do you want?” he asks in a low voice, staring at you hungrily. “Tell me.”
“First,” you start, pulling at his shirt again. “Get rid of this.”
He yanks his tshirt over his head, tossing it onto the floor. Standing before you now, shirtless, you get a true look at his brawny figure: huge biceps framing his body, thick pectorals protruding from his chest, chiseled abs sculpting his stomach. The man has muscles you didn’t even know existed. You delicately drag your fingertips up and down his torso, admiring him; his cock twitches against you at your touch.
“God you’re so fucking hot,” you mumble as you gaze into his eyes - giving him the most pathetic, needy, seductive look you can muster. 
Redness spreads across his neck and chest. He’s clearly easily flustered (at least, for you), and you plan to take full advantage of this. 
You slip one finger beneath the waistband of his sweatpants, tugging lightly. 
“Now, get rid of these.”
Obediently, he slides his pants down, having to stretch the elastic further to get it over his bulge. Kicking the sweats off, you get a clearer look at what he’s packing. Even through the dark fabric of his underwear, the outline of his hard cock is undeniable - not only long, but thick. Your pussy clenches at the mere sight of his size. 
You can't wait any longer. You run your hand over his clothed cock, feeling its weight in your palm. Jihoon groans, letting out the sweet sound you've until now only heard muffled through the wall. Hearing him now, here, in your bedroom - it's music to your ears. 
Reaching into his underwear, you grip your hand around his girth - he nearly whimpers at the sensation. You give him a few strokes before pulling his cock fully out, causing you to let out an audible gasp. 
Fucking shit.
Jihoon gives you an embarrassed smile, making you realize you said that out loud and not just in your head. But if anything your reaction wasn't even dramatic enough, because his cock is fucking huge. You take him in your fist, slowly pumping up and down; his eyes roll back into his head, letting out a deep sigh as you stroke him. You press your lips into his neck, planting delicate kisses into the soft skin.
“Oh god,” he groans under his breath. 
With his dick twitching in your hand, growing stiff and somehow even longer, you drop to your knees, positioning your face directly beneath the behemoth of a cock. You gaze up at him as you drag your tongue from his base to his tip; he strokes your cheek lightly with the back of his fingers, gazing down at you with a look of equal parts admiration and lust. You swirl your tongue around the head, tasting the precum that has dribbled out. Taking just a tiny bit of his tip between puckered lips, you begin suckling on it, lapping up his juices and teasing him with the bare-minimum stimulation. His low hum swells into a moan as you slowly slide his cock into your mouth, taking as much of his length as possible before you start to choke (Not yet, you think to yourself. Save that for later.)
“Fuck, you look so good right now,” he groans, cupping your cheek in his large hand as you stare up at him with big doe eyes. “So beautiful with my cock in that pretty little mouth of yours.” 
Sharp throbbing pulses between your legs at the slightest of praise. You slide your mouth up and down his length, gradually increasing your pace. His tip hitting the back of your mouth only makes you want more, makes you want to swallow him whole, gag on the entire shaft as his massive size fills your throat. Finally, you can resist no longer - you swallow the rest of him, your lips greeting his base as his full length slides down your throat. Tears instantly begin welling in your eyes, streaming down your cheeks as you bob your head up and down, choking on Jihoon’s cock.
He places one hand upon your hair, grasping it in his fist as you give him the absolute sloppiest head he’s ever received. Grotesque gagging sounds emanate from your throat, but are nearly drowned out by the lewd string of moans coming from Jihoon. He wants nothing more than to watch you choke on his cock, see your tears flowing freely as you stare up at him, eyes longingly transfixed upon each other - but he can’t help but shut his eyes, head falling back at the overwhelming pleasure you’re making him feel. It starts to take over his whole body - his hips reflexively begin thrusting, sinking his length deep into your throat. Before long he pulls you by the hair, wresting you off of him; strings of saliva stretch from his drenched cock to your coated lips, bubbles of spit running down your chin. 
“Sorry, that was going to make me cum way too fast,” he tells you with a sheepish smile. “You’re just so- ohhh…” His sentence is cut off by you placing one of his balls in your mouth, lightly sucking on it before taking the other as well. 
“Fuck that’s hot,” he grumbles, stroking your hair gently. You shift on your knees, trying to sit more comfortably upon the floor; Jihoon notices.
“Come here,” he instructs as he pulls you up off the floor. “I want you to be comfortable.” 
He brings you over to the bed, laying down atop it. You go to resume your place between his legs, but he grabs your arms to stop you.
“You should take these off,” he insists, tugging at your clothes with desperation in his eyes. “Please. I wanna see you.”
You pull your shirt over your head, discarding it to the floor. Slowly you unfasten your pants, sliding them down your hips - a bit timidly, for as horny as you are right now you’re suddenly afflicted with a wave of shyness. But the way Jihoon is looking at you - eyes glazed over with pure lust, licking his lips like he wants to devour you - is driving you utterly crazy. You swiftly remove your bra and panties, standing nude before him as he marvels at the sight of you.
“You’re perfect,” he says, his voice deep and gravelly. Your pussy clenches, attempting to alleviate the powerful aching in your core. Jihoon takes your hand, drawing you into the side of the bed.
“Sit on my face. Please.”
It’s not an order; the way he is looking up at you, squeezing your hand - he’s begging.
“Only if I can suck your cock at the same time,” you say with a cheeky grin. His eyes widen. 
“Would you like that?” you ask coyly, batting your eyelashes at him as you trace circles on his stomach with one fingernail. 
“Y-yeah,” he whimpers, his voice cracking slightly.  
“Good.”
You crawl onto the bed, swinging your legs over Jihoon’s head as you face his painfully erect cock. You situate yourself steadily, lowering your pussy toward his face, until you feel his soft, plush lips against you. Instantly he lets out a loud moan, the vibrations against your soaked core triggering a sharp jolt in your stomach. He wraps his arms around your inner thighs, holding you tight against him, his moans still resonating through the room even with his face buried in your cunt. 
He begins to work his tongue deep into your folds, licking every last bit, lapping up as much of your juices as he possibly can - the rest certainly dripping down his chin. You lean over, reaching for his thick cock one more; you grip the base tight in your fist, stroking the hilt while taking the rest in your mouth, bobbing your head up and down his length. The pathetic noises coming from under your cunt grow even louder - Jihoon begins to squirm underneath you, bucking his hips as he continues eating you out as if the world were ending tomorrow. He latches onto your clit, suckling on the stimulated bud; you cry out, but the sound is garbled amidst your cacophony of unbridled gagging noises. Your eyes flood with tears as your orgasm rapidly approaches - you grind your hips on his face, stimulating your pussy further and further, the burning in your gut swelling and swelling, your legs trembling even in Jihoon’s tight embrace. Your whole body convulses atop of his as you reach your climax. Desperate for air, you pull your head up, your mouth now empty but quickly refilled with cries of pleasure as you cum all over Jihoon’s face. 
“Oh my godddd,” you wail, your mind going blank as every nerve in your body lights up like fireworks. 
“Oh my god, oh fuckkkk, Jihoon…”
The rumbling vibrations of his groaning carry you through an overpowering orgasm; you ride out your high as he sucks on your clit mercilessly while his nose presses into your cunt. You’re seeing stars as you begin to come down, unable to think any coherent thoughts - instead basking in how fucking incredible Jihoon just made you feel. 
You lift your throbbing pussy off his face, giving your poor overstimulated clit a moment to recover. 
“Gonna cum, ‘m so close,” Jihoon moans. You quickly pop his dick back into your mouth, sliding his length in and out, hollowing your cheeks as you suck his cock like your life depends on it. 
“Ahh, ahhhhh, ah fuck-” 
Hot white ropes shoot deep into your throat as he releases. His melodic moans and whining cries form a grand symphony that fills your bedroom - in this moment, you are absolutely certain that you've never heard a more beautiful sound. 
His cock pulsates in your mouth, letting out every last spurt of cum for you to eagerly swallow. As he finishes, you slowly slide his cock out of your mouth - still marveling at the sheer size of it. 
“Oh my god,” he groans softly. You swing your leg over his head, turning yourself around to lay beside him. You wrap your arms around his torso, becoming the big spoon as you nuzzle your face into his neck. 
“Wow,” he proclaims with a deep, satisfied exhale. He lays silently as he recovers, catching his breath and coming back down to earth. Finally, with a sigh, he turns to face you. You raise your head up enough for your noses to meet. 
Jihoon gazes into your eyes, eyelids heavy in his post-orgasmic bliss. He hesitates, bringing his hand up to your cheek and cradling it gently. 
“Can I kiss you?” he finally asks, his voice no more than a soft whisper. 
You nod. He kisses you - this time not hungry and desperate, but slow and saccharine. Your lips lock, laying there entangled in each other’s embrace - his muscular arms hold you tight, enveloping you in the warmth radiating from both of your sweat-covered bodies. As your lips eventually part, you remain snuggled by his side - him playing with your hair while you trace your fingertips over his toned body. Eventually, he takes your chin delicately in his hand, tilting your face up to look at him. 
“I don’t know if fucking your next door neighbor is necessarily a wise thing to do,” he starts. “But that was incredible. You’re incredible.”
You smile. 
“I don't know either,” you chuckle. “But the way you basically broke down my door to come fuck me was really hot.”
Jihoon laughs, his face lighting up with a beaming smile. 
“Yeah, um. I'm not entirely sure what compelled me to do that.”
“I do,” you inform him. “You were thinking with your dick.”
“Okay yeah, you're right,” he admits with a grin. 
He reaches for your hand, interlacing his fingers with yours, squeezing your palm. 
“Would you want to do this again?” 
“Like, right now?” you reply. 
“No I mean like- … well, yes actually,” he answers, his face lighting up with excitement. “But I meant like, in the future.”
You nod, a wide grin spreading across your face. 
“I’d like that.”
“Good,” he smiles. “Me too.”
“But also…”
Your arms grab hold of him, rolling him over on top of you. He tries to shift, to not be placing his whole weight upon you, but you cling to him tightly, holding him in place. You roll your hips, stroking his still half-erect cock with your soaked cunt; you feel it pulse in response, already beginning to harden again. 
“I want you to fuck me,” you speak softly into his ear, continuing to grind your pussy on his cock. His eyes roll back in his head once more. 
“God you're so fucking hot,” he mumbles through gritted teeth. His eyelashes flutter as his eyes open again, peering down at you amorously. 
“Give me just a minute, baby,” he says as he shifts downward, positioning himself directly in front of your boobs. He grabs one with each hand, kneading the soft flesh in his grasp. He licks your nipple, swirling his tongue around the protruding bud, wetting it with his warm mouth before switching to your other breast. He gives them equal attention, licking and sucking on them, back and forth - whichever boob isn't in his mouth, he pinches your hard nipple, squeezing and rolling it between his thumb and forefinger. You press your hips up into his stomach, seeking any relief for your aching clit, but it's not enough. You whimper as he latches on to your left nipple, suckling on it so long you think you might cum again just from this. You feel the bed move beneath you as he grinds his cock against the sheets, thrusting into the mattress, seeking relief for his returned erection. 
He lifts his head up, releasing his latch on your breast with a wet-sounding pop. His eyes stay fixed on you as he shifts further down the bed, resting comfortably between your legs as his lips hover above your cunt. 
“Is this okay?” he checks before placing his mouth on you. You nod earnestly, brushing your fingers through his damp, messy hair. His tongue locates your entrance, slipping into your pussy, his nose brushing up against your clit, still highly sensitive from your first orgasm. You moan as his tongue glides through your folds, his face becoming soaked once again in your juices. He flickers over your clit, the warmth and wetness of his tongue quickly sending you over the edge. Your body writhes beneath him as you cum a second time, crying out with even greater pleasure than the first. It's almost overbearing, but you relish in it, delicious waves of bliss pulsating throughout your whole being. His tongue slows, licking you softly as you lay there, unable to move for a few good minutes, basking in the aftermath of your orgasm. Your fist slowly unclenches, releasing the grip you didn't realize you had on his tousled locks. 
“Damn,” you mumble, a big goofy grin spreading across your face. Jihoon crawls back up toward you, kissing you with lips drenched in your own cum. His cock, fully hard once more, brushes against your cunt. Although you're still trying to catch your breath, you place your entrance against his tip to taunt him. 
“Please fuck me,” you beg, desperate to feel him inside you. 
He pushes his cockhead into your pussy, letting out a moan as he feels your warmth. Your walls tighten as he slides the rest of his length in, fully enveloping his cock - he whines, loudly, letting the delicious sensation overtake him. He rests for a moment inside you, fearing to move as he feels the urge to cum already. But he’s too aroused to resist for much longer - slowly he begins to pump into you, deep thrusts stretching you out, filling you up like you've never felt before. He’s almost too big, but you love it. Tears well in your eyes again as he fucks you -  slow and tender at first, but gradually increasing his pace, soon pounding into you with powerful force. The stretch is overwhelming, but his long strokes and perfect tempo have you screaming his name, voluminous cries filling the air as he fucks you like you’ve never been fucked before. 
“You’re taking me so well baby,” he praises, his voice low and breathy. “So pretty…”
His voice trails off. High-pitched grunts and groans escape him as his body begins to stiffen, another climax rapidly on its way. He drives his cock into you, your perfect pussy squeezing him so tight that he can't think straight. 
“Y/n…” he cries. “Fuck, y/n I'm cumming…”
With several powerful thrusts he releases deep inside you, warm cum filling you up until you're completely full - so full that it begins to leak out of you, coating his cock and dripping all over the sheets. He finishes, laying frozen on top of you, heaving breaths echoing in your ear as he sinks his face into the crook of your neck. His cock rests inside you still, twitching occasionally against your walls. His breathing becomes so steady that you start to think he’s fallen asleep - but eventually he lifts his head, resting his temple on his fist as he takes in the sight of you, so pretty and fucked out beneath him. A lazy smile appears on his face as he stares at you, his pink cheeks glowing in his post-orgasm state. He looks so good that you involuntarily let out a little giggle. 
“What?” he asks, his grin growing wider. 
“You're just really hot, that's all.”
His face somehow turns even rosier. He lets out an embarrassed tsk as he tries to hide his face in his hands. 
“What? You are!!” you proclaim, pulling his hands away so you can see him again. 
“Sorry,” he replies timidly. “I’m not good with compliments.”
“You'll get used to it,” you say matter-of-factly. He raises an eyebrow at you. 
“You say that like this is going to be a regular thing now,” he retorts, trying to keep a straight face - but the corners of his mouth twitch upward, revealing the grin he's trying to hold back. 
“Do you want it to be?” you ask. 
Unable to hide his smile any longer, he nods. 
“I’d like that.”
Slowly, he pulls his spent cock out of you, making you whine at the empty sensation as even more of his cum spills out of you. 
“Wait here,” he says, giving you a soft kiss on your cheek as he rises from the bed. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”
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sosa2imagines · 21 days ago
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Happy Birthday Bucky! 🎂❤️
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Warning- None, just fluff and lots of love. Bucky has three kids, twins, a boy and a girl and a baby boy.
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The clock was ticking closer to midnight, and your heart ached as you watched Bucky sitting on the couch, completely unaware of the surprise you and the twins had planned for him.
For the entire day, you and the kids had pretended it was just an ordinary day.
You made sure to act normal, talking about errands for tomorrow, discussing grocery lists, even casually planning a visit to the compound, making it seem like nothing was special about March 10th.
Bucky, being the man that he was, didn’t let his disappointment show. But you knew him too well.
You saw it in the way his shoulders slumped a little, the small flicker of sadness in his blue eyes when neither you nor the twins mentioned his birthday.
And, God, it took everything in you to not jump into his arms and tell him how much you and the kids loved him, that you could never forget his birthday.
But you held back.
Because the surprise at midnight was worth it.
And just like that the night goes on.
Jamie was still wide awake, his chubby hands gripping Bucky’s vibranium fingers, gnawing on them as if they were his favorite teething toy, which they were, he inherited it from his sister.
Natalia and Samuel were hiding in their room, barely containing their giggles, waiting for your signal.
“Daddy will love our surprise, Sammy!” “Yeah, can’t wait to see daddy’s face, he’ll be so happy!”
Five minutes to midnight, you stood up, carefully handing Jamie to Bucky.
“I’ll be right back…” you said, trying to keep your voice casual. “Just getting some water from the kitchen.”
Bucky gave you a small nod, completely unaware, as Jamie snuggled into his chest.
And then, the most precious conversation happened between father and son.
Bucky adjusted Jamie in his arms, gently running a hand over his soft hair.
“Guess it’s just me and you, huh, bud?” he murmured.
Jamie, half-sitting on Bucky’s lap, blinked up at his father and blew a raspberry.
Bucky smirked, shaking his head. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
Jamie stared at Bucky for a moment, his little hand coming up to pat Bucky’s scruffy jaw.
Bucky raised an eyebrow. “What, you don’t like Daddy’s beard?”
Jamie squealed, giggling, before smacking Bucky’s cheek again.
Bucky laughed, shaking his head. “You’re ruthless, kid.”
Jamie babble-yelled in agreement.
Bucky smirked, bouncing him gently. “You’re not helping, you know? Everyone forgot my birthday. Even Mommy.”
Jamie blinked. Then let out a long string of baby babbles, as if he had a lot to say about that.
Bucky chuckled. “You think I deserve cake?”
Jamie clapped his hands, babbling enthusiastically.
Bucky sighed dramatically. “Well, too bad. No one remembers.”
Jamie gave him a judgmental stare, he then grabbed Bucky’s dog tags and yanked with all his tiny might.
Bucky winced, he gave Jamie a pout look, “Alright, alright I get it, I get it! You don’t wanna hear Daddy sulk.”
Jamie smacked Bucky’s chest, giggling and babble-shouted, slapping his tiny hands against Bucky’s chest.
Bucky chuckled. “That so? You think your mama and your brother and sister forgot my birthday?”
Jamie blew a raspberry.
Bucky smirked. “Yeah, I know. It’s not a big deal.”
Jamie grabbed at Bucky’s vibranium fingers, holding them in his chubby fists and shaking them.
Bucky shook his head. “You trying to tell me something, kid?”
Jamie let out a long string of babbles, his big blue eyes shining mischievously.
Bucky sighed dramatically. “Maybe they just don’t care anymore. I mean, I’m old, right?”
Jamie frowned and then he smacked Bucky’s face with his tiny hand.
Bucky choked on a laugh. “Okay, rude. I know I’m old, but you didn’t have to agree that fast, pal.”
Jamie giggled, patting Bucky’s cheek again, softer this time.
Bucky smiled, pressing a kiss to Jamie’s chubby little fingers. “You’re lucky you’re cute, kid.”
And just as Bucky was about to poke Jamie’s chubby tummy…
The door burst open.
“Happy Birthday, Daddy!”
Natalia and Samuel came running in, holding a cake, candles lit and glowing.
You followed behind them, smiling brightly, carrying a little party hat for Bucky.
The moment Bucky saw all of you, his eyes widened in shock, his breath caught in his throat.
Because you all remembered.
Natalia and Samuel started singing at the top of their lungs,
“Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday, dear Daddy! WE LOVE YOU!!!”
Jamie, overwhelmed with excitement, flailed his arms and let out a loud squeal, babbling as if he was singing along.
Bucky looked at you, then at the kids, then back at you, his heart clenching and eyes glistening.
“You guys…” he started, voice rough with emotion.
You smiled, walking over and placing the party hat on his head.
“Did you really think we would ever forget your birthday?” you whispered, kissing his lips softly.
Bucky swallowed hard, his arms tightening around Jamie. “Maybe just for a second.”
Natalia gasped. “Daddy! You think we’d forget?”
Samuel grinned. “We were just acting, we care about you so much!!! We got you good, huh?”
Bucky shook his head, chuckling. “Yeah, yeah you got me good, alright.”
Natalia and Samuel jumped on the bed and the birthday celebrations had officially began.
Bucky closed his eyes, made a wish, and blew out the candles.
The twins cheered, Jamie squealed, and you hugged him from behind, resting your chin on his shoulder.
Bucky cut the cake, feeding you first, then the twins, and finally Jamie.
The second Jamie tasted the frosting, his eyes went wide and then shoved his entire chubby hand into the cake.
Bucky barely had time to react before Jamie smeared the frosting all over his own face.
Samuel laughed hysterically. “Jamie’s wearing cake!”
Natalia giggled. “He looks like a cupcake!”
Jamie, pleased with himself, babbled happily, clapping his sticky hands together.
Bucky groaned. “Well, there goes my son. He’s part cake now.”
You laughed, wiping Jamie’s face. “And it’s your fault for giving him a taste.”
Bucky sighed, shaking his head. “Guess I asked for it, hopefully no sugar rush.”
Jamie climbed onto Bucky’s lap, grabbing onto his vibranium fingers and mouthing them again.
As the laughter settled, Samuel tilted his head, looking at Bucky seriously.
“So, Daddy…” he said innocently.
Bucky raised a brow. “Yeah, bud?”
Samuel smiled innocently, “How does it feel to be older than dinosaurs?”
You burst into laughter, while Bucky stared at his son in pure betrayal.
“I’m not that old!”
Samuel snickered. “I dunno, Uncle Steve is, and you’re like…his age, so...”
Bucky groaned. “I’m regretting this birthday already.”
Before anyone could respond, Samuel, completely unaware and in the flow of the fun, innocently dropped the bomb, “And wait till you see your surprise party tomorrow at the compound”
Natalia gasped, smacking his arm. “Samuel!”
Samuel blinked. “What?”
Bucky grinned. “Surprise party, huh?”
You sighed, shaking your head.
Samuel smiled sheepishly, “Oops.”
Bucky turned to you, smirking. “You guys planned a party?”
You smiled, kissing his cheek. “Of course we did, we love you Bubba!”
Bucky shook his head, laughing. “Well, guess I better act surprised tomorrow.”
You grinned. “Better practice, old man.”
Samuel snickered. “Older than dinosaurs!”
Bucky chuckled, pulling all of you in. “I love you guys. Even if you think I’m older than a dinosaur.”
Jamie slapped his face again, letting his presence known.
Bucky groaned. “Okay, especially you, kid.”
You then looked at Bucky, “I have a special gift for you.”
Bucky grinned, already intrigued his mind already heading to sex, “oh yeah? What is it, doll?”
You smirked, pulling out a small box. “This is actually something different.”  
Bucky took the box, curiosity flickering in his blue eyes. When he opened it, he froze.  
Inside was a custom-made dog tag necklace, but instead of military details, it had something else engraved, 
James Buchanan Barnes  
Loving Husband & Dad
Forever Our Hero
Bucky stared at it, throat tightening.  
You gently touched his hand, “I know how much your old tags meant to you, but I wanted to give you new ones. Ones that represent what you are now.”  
Bucky swallowed hard, looking at you with so much emotion in his eyes.
“This is…” He exhaled, voice thick, “This is perfect, doll.”  
You smiled, taking the necklace and clasping it around his neck. “Happy Birthday, my love.”  
Bucky didn’t say anything at first. 
Instead, he pulled you into a deep, lingering kiss, pouring all his love and gratitude into it.  
The twins made a yew sound, but Bucky simply smiled still kissing you, because he knew he's surrounded by love.
Love from you and his children.
When he pulled back, he rested his forehead against yours. “Best damn birthday ever.”  
Jamie simply blew a raspberry.
Happy Birthday, Bucky.
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yamumsyadadd · 1 day ago
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hidden (2)
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part one is here
For the most part, that’s how your relationship went for an entire year. Behind closed doors, hidden away from friends and family. It was truly exhausting.
There was one date out in public, the first and only one you ever went on. When Alexia asked you out, you didn’t even hesitate. The recommendation had come from Jana, it was her favourite hole in the wall restaurant that her and Jill found, she told anyone on the team who would listen.
In terms of first dates, it was awkward, the pressure to do small talk was evident but you both felt well past that. You had seen each other naked and done filthy things to each other before a date was even on the table.
The awkwardness broke when you asked about her foundation and the process of starting it. You leaned forward, fully absorbed into what she was saying. It was like a different side of Alexia was out that night, until she left you there. At the restaurant, alone.
After the waiter politely informed you that it was almost the end of your reservation, you went to the bathroom and Alexia said she’d wait at the front for you. Expect when you returned, she was gone. The waiter informed you that she settled the bill and then left.
It hurt, more than hurt actually. But once you saw Irene and her wife it all made sense.
“y/n, what are you doing here?” Irene’s gaze was intense, looking around for someone who could belong to you.
“Oh Jana finally convinced me to come here.” It wasn’t the best lie, but it was all you could come up with.
“Where is she?”
“Waiting at the car. I needed to use the bathroom, so she said she’d wait at the car, no point staying in here and being uncomfortable, right?”
“Right.” She slowly nodded.
“I better go. I’ll see you tomorrow at training!” you said your goodbyes and then left. Heading towards the carpark so your lie was somewhat more convincing. Alexia’s car was gone, she left. Truly left. No text message, no call, nothing.
Your brain was so confused. In the privacy of your apartment, alexia doted on you. She made you coffee and breakfast, even when she didn’t eat breakfast. But then at training, during the day, you didn’t exist.
As you walked home, a few tears slipped out. Was it your fault that she was like this? Was it how you looked? Were you simply not enough for her? While you walked, you sent Jana a simple message, no details, no fuss. 
If Irene asks, you and I went to dinner tonight.
You thought to yourself that if alexia wanted to pretend you didn’t exist, you would do the same to her. So you did. It only lasted an entire week. It was hard for you to ignore her late-night texts and calls, even harder when she would turn up to your apartment. But she never said anything to your face. At training, you didn’t exist to her expect for as a teammate, and you made sure you treated her the same way.
Sometimes, there was a flash of hurt across her face, it would only last a second or two, but you saw it. It made you feel guilty, sad for her, even if it was the same thing she as doing to you. So on the 7th night, you caved. Answering the door when she arrived fifteen minutes before midnight.
“Why have you been ignoring me amor?”
“Me? Ignoring you?” you couldn’t help the bitter laugh that came out, “Alexia, you pretend I don’t exist outside this apartment? At training? You don’t see me Alexia, really see me.” You didn’t realise that it actually hurt that much until you vocalised it, when she reached out to wipe a few tears that slipped, you let her. “You left me in that restaurant like an idiot. You didn’t call or text. I walked home crying because I thought I did something wrong.”
“No amor you didn’t. I promise. I saw Irene and Lucinda and freaked out. She doesn’t know how I feel about you; how alive you make me feel. I didn’t want her to find out, to try and burst our bubble. I’m sorry, truly I am. I will do better.”
You let her show you how sorry she was over and over again. And over the next two weeks, she did make more of an effort. At training, she didn’t ignore you, but neither of you wanted to outwardly tell your teammates about whatever this was between you two.
For two weeks she made you feel like you were on top of the world. Sending you restaurant ideas and talking openly about you meeting her family. When she asked you to be her girlfriend, officially, you said yes right way under the pretence that things wouldn’t change.
Slowly though, she slipped back into the way she was. When you’d laugh with Jana or Cata, she’d send a dirty look your way, as if you weren’t allowed to have your own friends outside of your relationship. The coldness returned fully after you asked about her family. Her mami and sister were at most of the games, and you simply wanted to meet them.
“no.” alexia didn’t even spare you a glance.
“No? alexia we have been dating for ages, they are always at the games and- “
“no. end of discussion.”
“But why Alexia?”
“Because I said no. why can’t you understand that.”
“I’m trying to understand why you are saying no. what about me makes you so ashamed?”
“Dios Mio, you are so dramatic. You aren’t meeting my friends or my family. End of conversation. If you keep going, then I’m going home.” Your heart broke. She is ashamed of you, but for what reason you didn’t know.
“You should leave.” You said quietly. Feeling the tears well up in your eyes.
“amor- “
“No go home alexia.” You slammed your bedroom door closed, sliding down the back of it and letting yourself cry into your knees. She left quickly after that, slamming the door hard and it caused you to cry even harder.
There was no one you could talk to about this. You’d promised to keep your relationship on the downlow, your friends at home didn’t even know. So you cried yourself to sleep. Alexia was still mad when you arrived at training the next day. Everyone was on edge as their captain stomped around the locker-room.
“God what is her problem today?” Jana said as she sat down next to you.
“Maybe she got dumped?” Esme whispered, you felt your chest tighten. Theres no way that Esme could know, is there? When you went to look up at her, she was already looking at you, eyes soft with pity.
“Maybe.” You said with a shrug, looking back down at the floor.
Alexia stayed mad, all day. You tried to ignore her, to focus on training but that became impossible when you were forced to face her in the final part of training. At first it was fine; she didn’t need to mark you and you were able to keep clear.
Then Jona changed things. With every elbow and every shove you could feel yourself growing more annoyed. By the end of it you decided to play her game, you wouldn’t let her treat you like this. At home or at training.
The tackle was clean, you didn’t make any contact with her body, only the ball. But the sheer force of it forced alexia to stumble, sending her body hurling to the ground.
“What the hell was that!” she screamed in your face.
“Ale, it was a clean tackle.” Irene came in-between the two of you before you had a chance to bit back.
“Bullshit it was!”
“Enough!” Jona’s voice cut through, “trainings done. Everyone go home.”
You all but ran back to the locker-room, not wanting to deal with the questions from your friends nor the wrath from Alexia. You didn’t move fast enough though because she came bonding in.
“What is your problem!”
You scoffed at her, as if she didn’t know she was the cause of it all, “leave me alone alexia.”
“No. you’re behaving like a child! You-“
“A child? Me? I think that’s you. Ever since-“ Irene’s entrance into the locker-room stopped you dead in your tracks, this wasn’t the time nor the place for it. “Forget it. Forget everything Alexia.” You through your bag over your shoulder and left. Ignoring the pleas from Jana and cata to stop.
The fight lasted a few weeks, it wasn’t completely radio silent. You would let her come over when you needed sex but never when she needed it. It wasn’t until right before Christmas break that Alexia came over and wouldn’t leave until you talked to her.
“I’m sorry okay? Im sorry.” She pleaded through the door.
“Go home Alexia.”
“Please let me talk to you and then I’ll go.”
“Talk.” You knew that as soon as she was in front of you, you’d forgive her. You love her too much not too.
“Open the door please.” And you did. Alexia looked like shit, in one hand she held a piece of paper, and the other was tucked safely in her pocket.
You left her standing there in the hallway, walking to the couch and sitting down. For a moment, alexia hesitated. She wrote a letter with everything she wanted to say, but now that she was here, she was scared.
She cleared her throat before starting, “I am incredibly sorry for the way I have treated you for the last four months. You deserved better, the truth is that I’m scared. Because I love you, so much. Every time we are together, I never want to be separated, I want to marry you, to have a family with you. But I can’t be public with this. Not now and maybe not ever.”
“Alexia, not once did I ask you to make this relationship public. I just wanted to be seen by your friends or your family. I wanted to know them, but you refused. Never telling me why and starting fights instead.”
“I know, I know. You can meet them, my sister, Alba, she would love you. My mami too. Please just let me show you.” She came to crouch in front of you, pulling your hands apart and placing hers on top.
“Okay.” You whispered out, getting lost in her hazel eyes as she searched yours.
Her hands cupped your face, and she kissed you hard. There were only a few days between the conversation with Alexia and Christmas break. To be fair to her, she did take you out. It was only to the Barcelona Christmas festival, but to you it was something. She openly held your hand, took photos of you and with you. Laughed and genuinely seemed like she was a changed person.
even over the break, while you were in America and she was in Spain, she called, she texted, she put in effort. To you, alexia had changed, had become the person she promised you.
She kept the promise of introducing you to her sister, it was only brief, but it was enough to satisfy you for now. There was a comment she made, about how it was almost Alexia’s birthday, something you knew, but what you didn’t know was that there was a party planned. A party you weren’t invited to.
There was a part of you that held out hope, that alexia would incite you, but she was just waiting for the right time. But that hope quickly disappeared as you sat there on your couch, on February 4th waiting for your girlfriend to turn up. She had agreed, you would make a nice dinner, give her a present and sex. But as the clock ticked closer to 1am, you realised that you were being stood up.
It was a reoccurring event. Alexia would make a promise, shed break the promise, a fight would ensue and then apologies, she’d change for a few weeks, maybe even a couple of months, but then go back to how it was. You decided, then and there, you’d give her until May, after that, if she hadn’t changed probably, then it was the end.
When may rolled around, you knew what you had to do. It was just about the timing. You didn’t want to go through a breakup in the weeks leading up to the champions league final, but you also didn’t want to continue in this hell scape of a toxic relationship.
Every time you tried, you chickened out. You couldn’t even bring yourself to stop inviting her over. As you stood in your living room, looking at all the odds and ends that Alexia had left in your apartment, a knock sounded.
“Esme?” you were confused, none of the girls had really ever been at your apartment, “Are you ok?”
“I actually came here to ask you that.”
“Come in.” you moved out of the way, letting her lead the way through to your loungeroom. Neither of you spoke for a little bit, Esme was looking around the apartment, probably making note of all of Alexia’s things like you had done mere minutes before her arrival.
“I have a girlfriend.” Esme looked at you, really looked at you, “we have a private relationship. But all our friends know, occasionally we post each other on Instagram but not super often, it’s something we both prefer… but you and alexia are different?”
“How did you know?” You were shocked, truly.
“I live a few doors down. I’ve seen you, in the hallway, in the garage. I’ve heard the fighting too.”
“it’s complicated.” She gave you a look to go on, you took a deep breath and unloaded, “for almost a year we have been in this cycle. I want to meet her family and her friends, but she doesn’t want it. At training, she acts like I don’t exist, but here, at home, it’s like im the only person in the world. I’ve tried, and tried, but it only starts fights and now, well, I’m tired.”
“there’s a difference between a relationship being a secret and hidden. Yours seems to be hidden.”
“It is. I don’t want that. I love Alexia, I love her so much, but all the fighting and making up, I can’t keep going like this.”
“you’re going to back up with her?” you nodded your head, Esme raised her eyebrows, “can you like wait? Until after the champions league? I’d like to win.” You laughed at that, because you too wanted to win.
The champions league final was electric. Something you had never experienced and were so incredibly grateful that you got the chance. By the end of the game, Barcelona were the European champions.
It was probably the high of the win, mixed with the alcohol, but when Alexia pulled you into her side and dragged you to meet her family, you felt almost disgusted. It seemed that you were only now worthy of meeting them because you scored in the final.
As you looked toward Esme, Irene stepped into your line of sight. She did not look happy at all, and you knew she wasn’t a fan of this relationship which made you feel better about ending it.
After the high of the Champions League win and the end of the season looming, you knew it was time. Alexia would stay in South America after the team had left, then going to her own camp to prepare for their first Olympics, you would fly back to America and stay there until it was time.
The plan was simple, you invite Alexia over, break up with her and then lock yourself in your room. But that never worked. Every time she came over, she looked even more beautiful, there was a glow about her, something you couldn’t shattered.
So as you sat on the plane, flying the mere two hours back to LA before international break, you sent her a simple text. You knew it was fair, but she hadn’t been fair for the majority of the relationship.
To Alexia: I can’t do this anymore, I’m sorry alexia.
You tucked your phone away, letting the tears fall. Just because it needed to be done doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt.
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deebris · 5 months ago
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Weight of Care
Simon Riley x little sister Reader (platonic!)
Synopsis: Simon, your older brother, has been your guardian since you were a baby. Amid the collapse of your family, he made the courageous choice to take you out of the house, raising you as if you were his own. However, despite being happy, your relationship is complicated. While you see Simon as a paternal figure, he struggles with the pain of being mistaken for one. His heart tightens every time you call him "daddy," and he thought you had managed to move past that—until you do it again one night.
Warnings: Just a little angst with a happy ending; reader is 6 years old.
Word count: 1.2k
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“Did you brush your teeth?” Simon asked upon hearing your muffled laughter. He opened the bedroom door, its walls now marked by your numerous drawings. Toys scattered across the floor shifted as he entered, and with the first step he took inside, something cracked underfoot, breaking.
“How many times have I told you that you need to put your toys away after playing?” he said firmly, shooting you a stern look. Simon hated messiness, but with you around, it seemed impossible to keep everything in order.
“I was going to put them away,” you murmured, embarrassed by the scolding. But your guilty expression quickly turned into a tearful grimace as your eyes fell your sheep, now shattered on the floor. “You broke it!” Your childish scream echoed through the room, and you hurried to gather the pieces with trembling hands.
“If you had put it away, this wouldn’t have happened,” he accused you, hoping it would serve as a lesson. Maybe then you would finally start to be more responsible with your things. And even knowing he was right, you couldn’t help but feel a pang of sadness at seeing your broken sheep.
Watching you wipe your tears with the sleeve of the pajamas and hearing sniffles made his heart soften. It was frustrating how he simply couldn’t stay mad at you. The last thing Simon wanted was for you to become a spoiled child, but in that moment, it was hard to maintain his sternness.
He already felt guilty for not being able to take care of you completely due to work, and knowing that Mrs. Trelawney, your babysitter, was much more lenient than he was only made everything harder. Every time Simon came home, you seemed more stubborn and whiny.  
“Come on, it’s time to sleep.” He lifted you by your armpits and placed you in bed, pulling up the yellow blanket that you loved so much. You had already taken a bath and were wearing clean lilac pajamas covered with stars. “I’ll buy you another one, you don’t need to cry.”  
“But it’s not the same,” you murmured as he collected the toy pieces from your hand, placing them on the dresser to throw away tomorrow. Some parts were sharp, so he checked your delicate hands, worried about possible cuts.  
“It’s the same,” he insisted, sighing tiredly as he tucked your feet under the blanket. Surprisingly, you didn’t argue, remaining strangely silent. “What’s wrong?”  
“Sorry,” you whispered, feeling bad for upsetting him. “I promise I’ll put it away.”
Your promise made him cast a quick glance at the bedroom floor, where pink, blue, and all other colored toys were scattered. Even your dolls were out of place, thrown in various corners. He still felt frustrated because you always said you would tidy up and never did, but this time it seemed different, so he decided to put a bit of faith in your word.  
“Tomorrow. Now you need to sleep.” He stood up to leave, but suddenly remembered something:  
“Teeth.” Simon said, and you blew near his face, letting him feel the freshness of mint on your breath. “Show me your tongue.” He spoke in a suspicious tone, knowing that you sometimes didn’t clean your mouth well. “Good.” He praised, satisfied to see you sticking your tongue out, then making a face, which made him laugh inside.  
He turned off the bedside lamp, watching you settle into the pillow, and began to move toward the door. But hearing your naive voice, he stopped in his tracks, his heart tightening:  
“Daddy, can I go to the museum with my class tomorrow?”  
“What?” Simon asked, stunned, still turned away from you, his hand frozen on the doorknob. Surprise echoed in his voice, mixed with a thread of worry. He slowly turned around, trying to decipher the expectation in your gaze.  
It had been so long since you last called him that. Simon thought he had finally managed to correct you after so many attempts, but he realized that wasn’t working. He had lost count of how many times he repeated that he was just your older brother, but deep down, he knew he was guilty. In trying to erase any trace of your father in your life, he had created a space where that confusion was natural. It was understandable that you saw him this way.  
“Miss Sarah is taking us to the museum tomorrow. Can I go?” You repeated the question, oblivious to the tension in his shoulders.  
“Why didn’t you ask earlier?” Simon swallowed hard, trying to regain his composure.  
“I forgot,” you explained, sitting up in bed to grab a piece of paper from your backpack. It was a permission slip for guardians to sign, allowing the trip. “Please?” You pouted, holding the paper in one hand and one of your decorated pencils in the other, as if that could increase your chances.  
“To the museum?” He asked, his voice tinged with melancholy. Simon sat on the edge of the bed, already starting to sign his name on the line, but his mind wandered to a distant place, filled with his conflicting memories and feelings.  
The situation between you two was complicated. You were the only family Simon had left, a little girl. He still remembers when he found out that his mother was pregnant and, even more, the first time he saw you. He had been away from home for several years, and coming back always felt torturous. But the idea of having something so small and innocent waiting for him was what truly saved him. 
Simon took you from home long before your parents died, unable to bear the thought of you growing up in that environment. After his brother died, he projected all the fears and regrets an older brother could carry onto you. It was as if you were his only way to redeem himself for Tommy. You were so young that you barely remembered the rest of the family; for you, the world revolved around Simon.  
He didn’t even realize he was wandering until he felt you gently pull the paper from his hands. Your big eyes locked onto his for a moment, filled with concern, until you broke eye contact, standing to put the paper away and lie back down, pulling the blanket over yourself.  
“Are you okay?” You asked, noticing he was still standing there, lost in thought. The nervousness in your voice snapped Simon back to reality, bringing him to the stillness of the room, where silence hung between you.  
Simon thought of several things to say, like, “You know I’m your brother, right?” or “We’ve talked about this,” but it felt like a never-ending cycle. It was as if nothing could stop you from continuing to call him that. He didn’t understand why it bothered him so much. He knew that, in practice, he played the role of a father in your life, something he chose for himself. Even so, every time he heard, a strange sensation coursed through his body.  
“Good night.” He simply said in his deep, familiar voice, but now, something different was in the air. For the first time, he didn’t try to correct or resist, finally allowing himself to accept the way you called him ‘daddy.’  
You hesitated for a moment, sensing something strange about him before responding softly: “Good night, Si.” And a faint smile formed on his lips, something rare, as if, at last, something had clicked into place.
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Taglist: @aenishas
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thelostconsultant · 6 months ago
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Coffee addict
pairing: Max Verstappen x reader
summary: The coffee machine dies late at night. Max (and Daniel) comes to your rescue.
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“No, please, don’t do this to me.”
Max looked up when he heard your voice from the kitchen, and as he moved there to see what was happening, he heard your quiet pleads for something to start working. He couldn’t remember ever hearing you sound like this, so defeated and sad, and it made him wonder what was happening. And when his eyes fell on you as you wept next to the coffee machine, he had a bad feeling that it was related to your favorite item in that kitchen. 
Before he could ask you, though, you noticed him and immediately rushed over to where he was standing to wrap your arms around him, seeking comfort by burying your face into his chest. “Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked while his hand rubbed your back. 
“It doesn’t work. The screen went dark and I can’t make it work again. I tried everything,” you sobbed. 
Now, here’s the issue. You loved coffee. You were addicted to it. While he chose to drink a Red Bull to stay awake, you made yourself a nice, steaming cup of espresso from your favorite type of coffee beans several times a day. It wasn’t healthy, he knew that, but you were so happy as you sipped your favorite drink that he didn’t have the heart to stop you. Sometimes he managed to convince you to cheat, to drink a decaf coffee, and on days like this, you stuck to normal coffee in the morning and in the evening. 
He gently peeled you off of himself to take a look at the machine, but no matter what button he pressed, it didn’t do anything. With a sigh, he looked over at you. “I’m sorry for your loss.” You nodded as you wiped your tears with the sleeve of your hoodie. “Okay, it’s late, I’m sure I won’t reach a store to buy a new one, but how about going to that coffee shop around the corner? They must be open.”
You glance down at your phone that lies on the kitchen counter. “No, they closed half an hour ago,” you reply sadly. 
“Oh.” Max thought for a second, then raised a finger with a wide smile. “I have an idea. You stay here, I’ll be right back,” he said quickly before pressing a soft kiss on her lips. 
Once he’s sitting in his car with the engine running, he presses a few buttons on the touch screen to start a call. It rings a few times, then a familiar voice cheerfully greets him. “What do I owe the pleasure of getting a phone call so late?” he asked with a laugh. 
“Daniel, I need your coffee machine, I’m on my way to your place,” he states without hesitation. 
“My coffee machine? You know I use that, right?” 
“Not that one, the backup you kept after switching to the newer model. It’s an emergency, I’ll return it tomorrow once I buy a new one. Please?” he tried. There was a long sigh on the other end of the line, and this made him worry. “What is it?”
“I gave it away since then,” he replied. Max cursed under his breath, fighting the overwhelming need to hit the steering wheel. This was the best idea he had, and even this didn’t work out as planned. His friend let out a thoughtful hum that broke the silence, making him listen once again. “I have a big thermo mug, though. I can fill that for you,” he offered. 
Thanking both the universe and Daniel that there was a solution to the problem, he managed to calm down by the time he parked the car in front of the building the Aussie lived in. When he entered his apartment, he was welcomed with a sympathetic look. “The love of your life is suffering from withdrawal symptoms?” he asked, a barely noticeable smile visible on his lips. 
Nodding, Max followed him to the kitchen, then leaned against a counter with his arms folded over his chest. “She’s quite literally grieving right now. She was crying when it didn’t turn on,” he explained. 
Daniel poured each cup into the mug, but he listened to the story of the broken machine, sometimes coming up with suggestions. He even questioned if it was even plugged in, an idea that made the Dutchman groan. “Yes, I did check if it was plugged in. It was, yet it doesn’t work. I’ll go and buy a new one tomorrow, and I’m genuinely thinking about buying a simpler backup machine.”
Fifteen minutes later he entered his apartment, calling out for you immediately. You padded over to him with a questioning look, and when your eyes fell on the mug, your gaze full of hope and happiness moved over to his face. He nodded with a smile and handed it to you, but you chose to hug him instead. 
“You’re my hero. I love you so much,” you mumbled into his chest. 
He kissed your head, then moved back to once again offer you the mug. “I love you too. Now, drink before it turns cold. And tomorrow morning I’ll go to that coffee shop to get you a cup, okay?”
As you took the precious item from him, you let out a thoughtful hum. “We could have breakfast there,” you suggested. 
“Anything you want. Now, I’m getting into the sim rig for that race. Don’t stay up too late,” he warned you kindly before giving you another kiss.
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jhdyuiee · 5 months ago
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unconditional
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⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆ pairing: ex-bf!jaehyun x fem!reader
⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆ warnings/tags: smut!, angst (first day back & i’m breaking yall’s hearts, sorry!!!), unprotected sex, oral (f&m receiving), multiple positions, multiple orgasms, cum eating, marking/biting, smacking, tit/breast play, making out/kissing, fingering, name calling (good girl) and pet names (love), jaehyun is jealous type, rough jaehyun, cliffhanger/mysterious ending (also sad)
⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆ w.c: 2.7k
⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆ a.n: hi, jiji is back! hm, it’s been a while. in all honesty, this abrupt break i decided to take worked out in the end bcs school has been a big pain in the ass as of late & so writing has gotten hard. i also would like to apologize once more for honestly everything. however i am back now and yes, yes i know jaehyun leaves tomorrow… sigh, let’s just say that for now bcs if not i’ll start tearing up, lol. don’t forget to stay safe guys, i love you very dearly & thank you for waiting, i will be back with so much more! 🤍
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the rain came pouring down hard and unexpectedly. you were not prepared for this at all, so you took shelter inside a cafe. you settled on waiting until the rain calmed down so you could go home.
staring at the gloomy weather made you rather gloomy as well. you never had fond memories of the rain, no dancing in the rain with your lover. instead, it was almost as if the rain brought your life some type of bad luck.
“y/n?” a male voice calls for you, causing you to turn.
your eyes widened, lips slightly parting at the person who stood in front of you.
“jaehyun?” you say lowly, low enough for the two of you to hear.
his face too changes, it’s almost like he’s trying to process it really was you who was in front of him. you took him in, noting how he hasn’t changed in the 5 years since you’d parted. in fact you’d say he got even more… hotter?
“it really is you,” he says breathlessly, to which you nod. “i-is the seat taken?” he asks as he points to the seat in front of you.
“n-no” you respond. he sits down, looking right at you.
“how have you been?” he starts off by asking.
“well… i-i suppose i’ve been fine. how about you?”
he thinks for a second before responding. “i could be better,” he says, chuckling. your heart nearly melting at the sight of his dimples, the very ones you used to adored.
he asks you more questions about how the past 5 years had gone, you too gaining insight on his past 5 years. there was never any mention if you or him were in a relationship during the past 5 years, it was almost like a forbidden topic.
you mindlessly turn to the window, noting how the rain had finally stopped but the clouds were still there. you didn’t know whether to leave mid-conversation or stay a while longer. it had been 5 years, 5 excruciating years without him… to leave him now was-
“are you going to leave?” his questions bring you back to him.
your mouth opens, then closes, and opens again but he interrupts. “don’t leave… not yet. instead, please stay with me for today y/n,” he asks.
you didn’t even hesitate, already settling on your answer before he even finished asking you. you two leave the cafe, you follow him walking alongside him under his umbrella. your head filled with the endless possibilities of how today could go and where the night would lead you.
⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆
“y/n,” jaehyun whispers into your ear in a sultry tone.
your hot breath tickled his ear as your eyes interlocked with his lustful eyes. you wanted him, he wanted you. it had been so long since you’ve felt not only his touch, but a touch at all.
“can i?” he whispers as his eyes are on your lips. you nod, inviting him in.
his lips crash onto yours, melting together as they once used to. he started off gentle, almost as if he were testing the waters before involving the kiss into something more rough and filled with desire. it brought you back to the days of 5 years ago.
his hands traveled to the back of your head, tugging on your hair. his tongue fighting its way inside you until it began crashing with yours. you started feeling weak, legs almost giving out but he held you. he pressed you against the wall, body nearly melting into yours. you could feel his hardened member as it pressed against you.
you moaned into the kiss, trying to say his name. he tugged on your bottom lip, finally departing from your lips. your eyes watery, face feeling hot all over. your dazed gaze finding jaehyun’s lustful one. jaehyun groans before sinking onto his knees. you knew where this was going, so you helped him.
you began taking off your shirt, bra, and unbuttoning your jeans, taking them off. just as you were about to take off your panties, his hands stopped you. “just open your legs for me,” he says, to which you obliged.
jaehyun gives you one last look before disappearing in between your legs. you felt his lips nip and kiss on your inner thighs, making sure to mark you up. his wet tongue licks your already soaked panties, moaning when he gets a small taste of you. a taste he has been dying to have for 5 years.
sliding your panties to the side he licks your cunt up once, getting a full taste of you now. jaehyun almost swears he’s addicted to you again. “how i’ve missed this taste,” he moans, meeting your eyes again before diving back inside you.
his tongue swipes up your slit one more time before using his two thumbs to spread your pussy lips apart. he lets his tongue intrude inside your entrance, sliding against your gummy walls. you moaned rather loudly at the intrusion, tightening around his tongue. jaehyun could feel as your walls throbbed around his tongue, his cock hardening at the thought of how your cunt would feel wrapped nicely around him. jaehyun cursed himself, finding himself too impatient.
you began chanting his name, crying it out with every fucking of his tongue. he found your voice so sweet, so beautiful like a song he could hear on repeat and never get tired of. your fingers grabbed onto his soft locks of hair, grinding yourself on his face. your clit rubbing against his nose, you felt yourself reaching your end already. jaehyun knew you far too well too, knowing you were reaching your end as well. so he grips onto your thighs, fucking his tongue quicker and when he feels your walls clench around him he pulls his tongue out.
you were left on edge, whining at the loss of sensation of not being able to cum. jaehyun didn’t look up, busying himself with kitty licking your cunt. he kissed your sensitive clit, once, twice, three times. so lost you failed to notice his two digits that already worked their way along your slit.
“j-jaehyun?” you asked hazily, looking down at the male as he already stared straight at you. “wha- oh my god!” you moaned out the last part when you felt his two digits plunge inside your soaking cunt. the squelching sound echoing in the doorway, you didn’t even worry about if your neighbors heard. you were far too focused on the way his fingers fucked inside you over and over so quickly. already sensitive from his tongue, you were close to cumming again.
“i-i’m gonna c-cum!” you breathlessly groaned, biting down on your lips so as to not shout again. jaehyun had no intention of leaving you on edge again, so he fucked his fingers into you faster and deeper. he attached his lips onto your clit, toying with it. he remembered how much you loved it when he would teasingly dote on your clit. jaehyun knew your body as if it were his first language.
you let out a gasp before you finally came all over his hand and face. you hadn’t cum like that in a while, your fingers only being able to pleasure you so much. jaehyun licked you up one more time before kissing your clit. he got up, holding your body up before you could fall onto the ground. your legs were giving up already.
he shoved his soaked fingers into your mouth, your tongue licking them clean. “you did so good, love. was always such a good girl for me,” he whispers. his way of words, too, always turned you on.
when you finally licked him clean, he removed his hand from your mouth. in a split second his demeanor changes, his eyes turning more gentle. “as much as i wanna be inside you, i don’t have a condom. so-” you interrupt him. “i-it’s alright jae, please just… i wanna feel you.”
your words too turned him on, in a matter of seconds his pants and boxers were off. his aching cock standing proud. “jump,” he tells you.
you jumped, legs wrapping around his waist. your back still against the wall. his cock rubbed along your soaking slit before his leaking tip plunged into your entrance. 
“fuck- you’re so tight, no one fucked this pretty pussy while i was gone?” he groans. you didn’t respond, already drunk stupidly on his cock that was snugly wrapped around your gummy walls. it had been too long since you’d taken anything like his.
your eyes widened when you felt a smack against your ass cheek. “i asked you a question, or are you too drunk already to answer,” he says in a rough tone.
“uh, ye-yes b-but they don’t c-compare to y-you!” you moaned loudly when you felt him thrust into you rougher, deeper.
jaehyun was always the jealous type when it came to you, you were his and his alone is what he thought. in his world, no one was allowed to have you, it was the one thing he regretted when you two broke up. he couldn’t fathom the fact that some filthy bastard would be able to lay his hands on you, someone as tasteful as you.
“no one could leave you satisfied, right love?” he asks you, to which you just repeatedly say no. his mouth forms into a smile before his lips find themselves on your shoulder. his lips kiss along them, traveling to your neck, and jaw before coming down to your tits.
he pecks one of your tits before wrapping his mouth around your nipple. he accidently bites on your nipple when he feels you clench around his cock. jaehyun mutters a small curse as he kisses his way to your other breast. it receives the same attention as the previous one, only that this time he doesn’t accidentally bite your nipple.
“such perfect tits… were always my favorite,” jaehyun mutters, kissing your tit before parting from it. “now then, are you ready?” he asks you.
“y-yes please fuck me, be rough like you used to,” you said desperately as you wrapped your arms around his neck.
jaehyun’s hands grip onto the bottom of your ass where he lifts you up slightly before plunging you back down on his cock, chucking at your choked out moan. you truly were the cutest, he loved you so very much.
he slides his cock in and out, out and in, of you. he groaned against your exposed neck as you repeatedly clenched around him. you couldn’t help it, jaehyun fucked you so deeper, cock reaching your womb with every thrust. it wouldn’t be long before you’d cum again.
crushing you to the wall, he secures you against it so he could maneuver one of his hands to your clit. he used his thumb to rub the poor thing, “cum, cum on my cock like the good old days love.”
and so you do, erupting around his cock that still fucked into you. you knew he wouldn’t stop until he came, so you waited, encouraging him with filthy words to get him worked up. it was doing the trick, you felt him twitch inside you.
“whe-where do you w-want me to cum?” he asks you, thrusting into you quickly, nearly at his release.
“in mmh-me!” you moaned, clenching around him. “a-are you sure?” he questions you.
“y-yes, i’ll buy a pill tomorrow– please, just please i wanna feel your warmth inside me~”
“fuck,” jaehyun curses, filling you up with his seeds. his lips crashing onto yours as you milked him of his cum.
he parts from the steamy kiss you two just shared to carry you to your bedroom. he still remember the layout of your apartment. jaehyun drops you on your bed, and you watch as he takes off his shirt, sneakily glancing at his still hardened member. your mouth is nearly drooling all the more.
“turn around, on your hands and knees love,” jaehyun says, watching as you obliged to his every word. he watched as you arched your back, ass sticking out nicely, leaking with his cum. he couldn’t resist smacking your ass, left and right roughly. you moaned against your bed comforter, clenching it tightly as you got smacked from behind. you feel his warm cum dripping down your thigh, you try clenching your entrance– jaehyun taking notice.
“how cute, trying to make sure it doesn’t slip out?” he teasingly says before jerking his cock, bringing it to your slit. he rubs against your juices and his cum before stretching your gummy walls once more. it was incomprehensible how tight you always were, just right for him– just made for him.
“how is it love? you always loved it when i took you from behind, didn��t you?” he continues to tease you. “i love it! i love your cock so much j-jae, so good~”
he gripped your hips tighter, tight enough to leave prints the next day. you felt as his tip touched your g-spot so clearly, reaching your womb with every thrust in. jaehyun watches as you begin to wiggle underneath, shaking your ass against him. he smirks, smacking your ass which jiggled from his touch.
a white ring formed around his cock, a mixture of you both. it oddly enough ignited him, fucking into you in rapid, deeper strokes. your tears and drool adorning the comforter. your tight walls hugging his cock tightly, and with one smack to your ass you came for a third time. you gushed all over his pelvis.
“good girl,” jaehyun mutters, continuing his ministrations before he too came once again. only this time he didn’t part from your pussy, fucking you in slow, gentle thrust.
by the time he finished, he laid on your bed. jaehyun was exhausted, and you were too but… you still had something up your sleeve. crawling to him you stopped on his side. “wh-what are you doin-” jaehyun gets interrupted mid-sentence when he feels your lips kiss his tip. he didn’t stop you, in fact he wanted you to continue.
you spit on his cock, jerking it as to spread your saliva along his shaft. your eyes traveling back to jaehyun who hungrily looked at you. going back to his cock you lower your head, opening your mouth so you could finally take him inside. you shoved his cock inside until the tip reached your throat, you gagged and groaned against his cock when you felt him twitch inside. staying like that for a while longer, trying to get accommodated. once you did, you started bobbing your head on his cock, using your tongue to lick along his shaft. never forgetting to tease his slit, something he loved.
you felt as one of his hands tugged on your hair, helping you to better move yourself on his cock. jaehyun was a mess, he felt blessed– praised the lords above. he tried thinking of the nastiest atrocities known to mankind as to not bust so quickly, but that proved to be an impossible task. i mean, how could he when you so beautifully wrapped your sweet mouth around his cock.
and so it wasn’t long before he came inside your mouth, your mouth feeling his warmth before swallowing it down. you now felt so full, unable to take anymore. jaehyun too, you milked him dry, taking all of him in you.
you crawled to him, laying beside him. he engulfs you into his embrace, kissing you so tenderly. you two were exhausted but for what it was worth, it wasn’t regretful. his hand strokes your back, playing with your hair. it was peaceful, so peaceful that you secretly wished for your days to be like this. you were almost lulled to sleep by jaehyun before you opened your eyes when he whispered into the quiet room.
“we’re unconditionally timeless, and so is our love.”
far too exhausted to reply back, you just smile. you snuggled into his body, melting into him before you drifted off to dreamland. however, it wasn’t until you woke up the next day and felt the cold that you knew. 
jaehyun was gone, gone from your life once more. the intimate night you two shared last night, his parting gift.
there was no getting back together, no peaceful nights where the two of you lay in each other’s embrace. you cried and cried that entire morning, and silently prayed for a day where you two could reunite again. for fate to align you two again because after all…
jeong jaehyun was your first love and last love.
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© jhdyuiee
2024. 11. 03
final a.n: AHHHHH, jae leaves tomorrow. i don’t know what to do guys, like my man is leaving for the next 2 years. like what do you mean my man who has served needs to serve more?! consider this story as my last jaehyun fic while he is still a free man, lol, and no this doesn’t mean i’ll stop writing abt him. instead, think of this as a new beginning (?) okay i think that’s enough… i’ma go now! i hope you all enjoyed this read (wrote it in one day, very proud of my dedication after all the chaos school has brought me) and i’ll be sure to upload lots this month! stay safe, may we jaehyun fans make it until may 2026!
p.s: the cover picture makes me go feral, i just had to include it!
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elysianightsss · 6 months ago
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I BURN FOR YOU | PART ONE
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Simon’s heavy footsteps echo in your ears, the floor boards of the church creaking as he walked. At least he was courteous enough to help you into the carriage, you thought as you grabbed onto his large glove covered outstretched hand letting him guide you inside before getting in himself and sitting on the plump cushion seating opposite you.
The footman closed the door just as your families came out to throw flower petals and wave you off. The sight of them so happy made you more glum than this whole day had.
“Well that was a dreadfully boring ceremony.” Simon quipped, leaning his head back as the carriage started moving. Your gaze did not move from your parents, their smiles made you grimace.
“It’s rather sad that I couldn’t be entertained at my own wedding. Wouldn’t you agree wife?” The man across from you had almost snarled out the word wife.
You simply roll your eyes at him, something he does not take kindly to.
“If I had been in the country when this was all being arranged, I could’ve stopped this from ever happening in the first place. I wouldn’t be shackled down in this ridiculous sham of a marriage!” He snaps, the scar on his chin that goes right through his lips and stops at his Cupids bow, moves with each word he spits your way, fire in his eyes as he does so.
“Trust me the feelings mutual.” You scoff, snapping back at him.
“Oh, I’m well aware wife. I could tell as much as soon as I lifted your veil and saw the scowl on your face.” He chuckles with no humour, it’s dark and unnerving causing you to shift in your seat. “How fortunate I am to have such a beautiful bride” The sarcasm drips from his lips in a way that makes your blood boil but you manage to bite your tongue even if he seems unable to.
“Even when he’s dead, my bastard father still finds ways to meddle in my life. Arranging a marriage behind my back, of all things.” The leather of his gloves squeak when his fists tighten in anger.
“Well, it’s no matter. As long as we pretend for the next three months, we shall be free to live our lives separately once the London Season ends, per our families’ agreement. It should not be too difficult to accomplish such a task, will it wife?” Simon raises an eyebrow but yet somehow manages to keep the scowl on his face.
“No. Husband.” You say through gritted teeth.
He is thankfully silent for the next half an hour, and again he does help you out of the carriage when you arrive outside the manor that is now your home. You gaze up at the structure with awe, it was much bigger than your old home though your father was a Baron and Simon was a Duke.
“I’m leaving the grand tour of the estate to the housekeeper. Oh and do try to remember where everything is, I won’t be walking you to your bedroom each night, wife.” He says briskly as he walks passed you and ascends the stairs.
He pauses, snapping his fingers like he’s forgotten something before shooting over his shoulder at you, “Sleep well, dear wife. I do so look forward to seeing what excitement our marriage brings. I’ll see you bright and early for breakfast tomorrow!” He hollers back at you and so swiftly disappears inside.
“Not on your life.” You mumble to yourself, scoffing at his audacity. “What an insensitive, intolerable arse.” You sigh sitting down on the steps of your new home. You gaze out at the beautiful gardens. The night sky full of stars and a chill had set in, a sign that winter wasn’t far away.
“Excuse me Your Grace.” Looking up from where you had been admiring the patch of red tulips off to your right, you met eyes with a welcome smile.
“I am Johnny, the housekeeper. I run the house and keep all the staff in check. It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance Duchess.” You smile softly at him and with his help you stand from where you were on the cold steps.
“The pleasure is mine Johnny. I didn’t think there would be a kind soul here given the master of the house but it appears I am mistaken.” Johnny coughs to cover up his laugh but his smile remains.
“Allow me to escort you to your room, Your Grace, you must be exhausted after the day you’ve had.” His Scottish accent soothed you as he held his arm out for you to take. Hooking your arm with his, you let Johnny guide you inside the manor. The decor and architecture was pleasant on the eyes and by the looks of it very expensive.
Johnny leads you up the grand staircase and into the west wing where he pushed open a cream coloured door to reveal your bedroom. The room was large and painted a dark blue, the four poster bed was the biggest bed you’d ever seen in your life. The fireplace opposite the bed was lit, the wood burning nicely and crackling away creating a lovely atmosphere.
Further in just after the bed were two reading chairs facing the large window, you gaze out of it seeing the very same garden you were looking at before. Except the red tulips were right below you and from here you could see the large pond and the stables.
“Through there are your belongings.” Johnny said, pointing to the door just to the right of the bed, behind you. You had quite forgotten he was there but managed not to show how you flinched at his voice.
You nodded, “I can dress myself for bed, please do not disturb the maids. I wish to sleep now.” You communicated trying to sound as soft as you could.
“Of course Your Grace, I bid you goodnight.” Johnny bowed and left the room, closing the door behind him leaving you all alone. You’re just glad it wasn’t dark in your room. Getting changed out of your layered wedding dress and into your nightdress was a task and a half but you feel accomplished as you crawled into the large bed and snuggled down for sleep.
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You are woken up bright and early just as your husband had said. Your maids got you bathed, dressed, and downstairs for breakfast in record time.
Your husband was already inside the dining room, a newspaper in his hand and a cup of tea in the other. He acknowledged you with a good morning but you only nodded back to him and sat down in your seat at the other end of the long, seats fourteen, table. Opposite one another, yet so far away.
A layer of awkwardness settled upon the moment with cutlery scratching against plates, and glasses clinking with the table being the only thing that was heard. Even the servents glanced at each other nervously, the atmosphere tense.
Simon couldn’t help but wonder what had happened to you. You hadn’t said a word this morning, you had a sharp scowl on your face, even the way you buttered your toast was harsh.
“You’re awfully quiet.” He tested the waters, but again you said nothing. Only responding with a nod. “Last night you spoke to me. Or is it that you prefer to mutter things to yourself? What was it you called me again? An insensitive, intolerable arse” he laughed, it was small but held such amusement.
“I must admit, I have never heard such crass language leave a proper young lady’s mouth before.” That makes you pause as you’re about to cut into a sausage, he’d heard you bad mouthing him.
Your cheeks warm with slight embarrassment but Your glare is enough to get him to change the subject, “You’ve hardly eaten your breakfast. Is the food not to your liking? Do I need to have the chef prepare another meal for you?’ At this you shake your head no but that only frustrates Simon even more. “Then might I ask if there is something troubling you?” He tries, eyes holding a curiosity that makes you want to curl in on yourself and hide.
“No” You state.
And that’s it. That’s how it continues for the next two weeks of your marriage. Where other newlyweds would be rolling around together in bed in newly wed bliss. You are avoiding your husband and barely speaking to him during meal times something he is more than happy to point out.
Simon snaps one evening after asking you once more if something is the matter, to which you responded, “What’s it to you?” He most certainly does not take kindly to your attitude.
“Well forgive me if my curiosity is somewhat piqued. You are quite talented at making yourself scarce, so I apologize if my inquiry as to what my wife is thinking is a step over your boundaries!” He slams his knife and fork down on the wooden table.
There is a pause where it seems like the whole world is silent. You stare at your husband, watching closely as he tries to calm down from his outburst. Once he takes his fourth deep breath you decide to speak.
“Do you even care?”
Simon lets out a cold laugh at your question, “Out.” He commands to the servents, they make themselves scarce, the doors shutting behind them.
“Whether I ‘even care’ or not is irrelevant. Like it or not, we are husband and wife. And for the next three months, we must at least look like it.”
“Why should that matter here?” You roll your eyes placing your knife and fork down, though much more gently than Simon did.
“You are truly ignorant if you think we don’t have to pretend even within the confines of this estate. Servants have eyes. And ears. And we have little control over what they choose to share with those outside of this household. I have no doubt word of the state of our marriage has already reached London and spread throughout the Ton.” Simon stands, his chair scratching against the floor as he does. His heavy footsteps make the floorboards creak and it reminds you of your wedding day.
“This is truly disastrous.” Simon says bitterly as he pours himself a drink of amber liquid from one of the many crystal bottles on the side table.
“I’m not exactly having the best time of my life here with you either.” You sit back in your chair, folding your arms over your chest. Defensive and detached.
“Oh I’m well aware, you don’t exactly hide your distaste for me well, and I would be lying if I said the feelings were not the slightest bit mutual. But it would be wise to at least learn to tolerate each other’s presence.” He barks irritatedly swirling the amber liquid around in his glass before knocking it back. The glass is finished in one big gulp, it leads him to pour another before returning to his seat.
“Now with all that settled, I would very much appreciate it if you could cooperate with me in our little endeavor, dear wife.” Simon does what you think is a smile but you’re unsure. It looks more like a vicious dog baring its teeth to you in warning before it bites.
A few moments of silence between the two of you. You didn’t want this. A loveless marriage with a man who had absolutely zero interest in you. At least he wasn’t beating you though, or worse. Your brain pushes those thoughts aside and pushes you to think about what could have been instead.
It makes your heart ache and your eyes well up with tears. The last thing you want to do is cry in front of Simon. You abruptly push your chair back and storm out of the room, slamming the door behind you as you leave.
You’re panting by the time you get to your room, the tears pouring down your face as you heave. You’re on your knees before you know it, sobbing into your hands. The world moves on around you while you cry and pray for a different life. That this is all a dream and you’ll wake up soon in your old house with your old life before your parents decided to give you to this man.
You manage to pull yourself onto your bed where you cry yourself to sleep.
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The rain was coming down hard now you noticed, a simple contrast compared to how it drizzled when you had woken up. Well, more like forced awake. The nightmare still fresh in your mind, a life you’d never have, your husband with other women. A loveless marriage and a baron home.
Your nose was blocked and your eyes puffy and sore from your melt down earlier. You washed your face and changed into your white nightgown and dark red robe before lighting a candle and making your way to the library.
The library, you could live and die happily in here. It was full of all your favourites and you always left the room with a smile on your face. A hard contrast to how you had left your bedroom earlier this evening.
You were so immersed in reading when Belle begins to fall in love with the beast that you didn’t even hear the library door slowly creak open.
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To be continued…
Taglist | @watyousayin @corvusmorte @callmecurious97
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eros7hanatos · 1 year ago
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➽ Sleepless Nights
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Husband!Diluc x wife!afab reader Warnings: smut, breeding kink, creampie, unprotected sex, I think that’s all? Word count: 811 A/N: inspired by rice-hime’s fic “well into the weekend”. Diluc is so husband AND daddy material I can't-
art creds: asterrales
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Your hands tightly grip the sheets, trying to claw your way out, weakly pulling yourself forward as Diluc’s firm hands pull your hips back; eliciting a loud moan from you.
“D-Diluc!” you scream, your voice as shaky as the rest of your body. You turned your head back to see the glistening body of your husband. He looked so pretty like this, watching you through his red hair that kept sticking on his face, whether it was from sweat or your cum, you didn't know nor care. 
“Didn't you say you wanted us to have a child, love?” he said in a tone so sweet, not matching with his rough and harsh thrusts. You gasped as he reached deeper inside your cunt, pressing onto that sensitive spot. You two had been married for a while now. He was a great husband, however he was almost always busy with work and his own things. You two hadn't had time alone for a long long time, always falling fast asleep before he had even come home. However today was different, Diluc had come back early and you told him how you felt. In a moment of weakness you let slip that you wanted a child.
“You…want a child with me?” he asked, slowly, as if he was thinking hard about what you just said.
“Yes, but it doesn’t have to be now! I understand that you're busy and don't have time. We haven't had sex since our wedding night…you’re probably too tired after working everyday.” you say, you were a bit sad, you had to admit. You would often masterbate alone, missing his fingers, his mouth, his cock… but he was busy, there’s no way he would be able to have time to pleasure you.
“Then it’s a good thing tomorrow's the weekend.” he surprised you. You look at him, wide eyed.
“B-but what about the tavern? and the winery? They’re both open on weekends.” 
“Fuck it. One weekend is worth putting a baby in you.” 
And that’s how you got to this situation. Completely fucked out under Diluc. Archons, how long has it been? You then feel that familiar sensation in your lower abdomen, cunt clenching around Diluc’s cock. You screamed, but no noise came out of your throat as you came once more, sucking your husband dry.
“F-fuck. Y-you have such a beautiful cunt, love. All mine. Let me fill you up again, fill you up until I’m sure you’ll bear my child.” 
His pace slows, pulling his cock out just below the tip to watch the mixture of yours and his juices ooze out of you before slamming back in. Even as his pace slowed, you felt as if he reached even deeper inside you, poking your womb gently. As if giving it a gentle kiss every time he thrusted.
“D-Diluc!” you moan, chanting his name over and over again, like a mantra. You can feel every inch of his cock, every vein, every crevice rubbing against your walls wet with slick. The sounds of vulgar and messy sex that bounces off the walls drives you crazy, the stench of his cum and yours adding to your madness. “F-feels so good. N-need more of your- Ahh! c-cum!”
“I’ll give it all to you, love. Sh-shit- you’re clenching so tight. J-just lie back there while I pump you full of my seed.” 
You feel your cunt pulse, clenching and convulsing, that familiar electric feeling had come to greet you once more. “D-Diluc! C-cumming! ‘M c-cumming!” 
“Hah, hold it out, please, for me love? Want us to- Ngh! C-cum together.” Diluc grunts, fastening his pace and deepening his thrusts, reaching places that you’ve never known he could. You whine and scream, trying your best to delay your high as tears fall from your eyes.
“D-Diluc!” 
“A-almost there, love. Gonna put a baby in you!” he says, looking at you through the curtain of his blazing red hair once more, his grip tight on your hips as he slams into you over and over, chasing his own high. With a few more harsh thrusts, Diluc grunts, “C-cum for me love. G-gonna breed you so well-” 
You both scream, almost in unison, reaching your peaks as a familiar warmth fills your insides. His thrusts continue, letting you ride your high as well as his as he continues giving you his seed which you welcome with open arms, ahem, open legs.
After a moment he stills inside you as your head falls onto the bed sheets below you. You breath heavily then let out a loud gasp as you feel rough fingers brush your clit gently. 
“D-Diluc?!” you say, breathlessly as it turns into a moan. Suddenly, you felt his hips snap into action, slamming into your still sensitive cunt as you cry out in overstimulation.
“I said the weekend. We’ve barely even started, love~”
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lvzrii4 · 3 months ago
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꩜ .ᐟ christmas’ warmth
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— ✮⋆˙ riki x reader ✮⋆˙ fluff ✮⋆˙ 0.7k wc ✮⋆˙ grammar errors
when christmas doesn’t feel like christmas, but nishimura riki exists.
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It was Christmas again. Time had flown by so fast that with just one blink, it was already the season where families gather to celebrate and enjoy each other's company.
Christmas was supposed to be fun, right? But this year, it didn't feel like Christmas at all. And that made you sad, especially since Christmas was your favorite time of the year.
You sighed as you stared at the dining table. You’d prepared all the food, thinking your family would be there to enjoy it with you. But plans had changed.
Your parents were called into the hospital for a sudden emergency, and your older siblings couldn’t make it home because of college. You honestly hated being the youngest sometimes.
The coldness outside matched the emptiness you were feeling. The winter chill wasn’t just in the air—it was in your heart.
"I guess I’ll just watch a movie and eat the food," you muttered to yourself, trying to sound upbeat. You didn’t want your Christmas to be gloomy, but it was hard to shake the feeling.
You had just settled onto the couch with your food when your phone rang. You glanced at the screen and saw Riki’s name. A smile immediately spread across your face as you answered.
“Hey, Ri! Merry Christmas!” you greeted, your voice brighter than you felt.
“Merry Christmas, baby,” Riki’s voice came through the phone, warm and familiar.
“So, how’s your Christmas going?” you asked, as you flopped back onto the couch with a small sigh.
“Doing fine. How about you?” Riki’s tone shifted slightly, sensing the difference in your voice.
You hesitated before replying. “Yeah, everything’s okay. It’s just… my family’s not here, so I’m spending Christmas Eve alone. But it’s fine, nothing to worry about,” you said, trying to brush it off with a laugh.
But Riki wasn’t fooled. “Everything’s really okay?” he asked, concern lacing his voice. He knew how much Christmas meant to you.
You smiled softly. “Yeah, really. It’s just a bit… lonely, I guess.”
There was a pause on the other end, and then you heard a soft shuffle, like footsteps in the snow.
“Actually…” Riki’s voice sounded closer now, “I’m in front of your house right now.”
Your heart skipped a beat, and your eyes widened. You immediately jumped up and rushed to the door, throwing it open. There he was, standing in front of you, snowflakes dusting his dark hair and shoulders.
“Hi,” Riki waved, his breath visible in the cold air.
You blinked in surprise, lowering the phone from your ear as you pulled him inside. “What are you doing here?”
“I figured your family might be busy, so I rushed over,” Riki explained, smiling as he shook the snow off his coat. His hands gently found their way to your waist, pulling you closer.
“But… what about your family? Your friends?” you asked, feeling a little guilty. You didn’t want him to skip his own celebrations just for you.
Riki chuckled softly, his breath warm against your skin. “There’s always tomorrow, you know? Besides, let me prioritize you tonight, alright? And don’t worry, they know I’m here.” He smiled reassuringly, before adding, “Now, let’s enjoy Christmas Eve together, yeah?”
You couldn’t help but smile back. “Alright, that sounds perfect. But I hope you’re hungry—because I made way too much food.”
“Now you’re speaking my language,” Riki teased with a playful grin, making you laugh as you led him to the table.
The night passed quickly, filled with laughter, jokes, and spent the rest of the time by a Christmas movie marathon.
At some point, you checked the time and realized it was already past midnight—Christmas Day had arrived. You couldn’t stop smiling as you felt Riki’s arms wrap around you from behind. His chin rested on your shoulder, his voice a soft murmur in your ear.
“Merry Christmas, baby,” he whispered, his breath warm against your skin.
“Merry Christmas, Ri,” you replied, your heart swelling with affection. You turned in his arms, cupping his cheeks gently in your hands.
“Thank you,” you said, your voice soft and full of gratitude. “Thank you for making my Christmas special.”
Riki’s smile grew tender, and without another word, he leaned in, his lips brushing softly against yours. The kiss was slow, warm, and comforting, as if the chill of Christmas had been completely washed away by the warmth between you two.
“Anytime.”
With Riki by your side, Christmas finally felt like Christmas again.
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crazycat010 · 8 days ago
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Jealousy Jealousy
Levi Ackerman x Reader
Based on the song "Jealousy Jealousy" by Olivia Rodrigo.
PART 2 : Scars
Warnings: insecurities, angst, sad, small fluff, reader loses her friend because of a new girl named Natasha (sorry if that's your name), unrequited love, mention of death and sacrificing yourself for Humanity's sake. Sad angsty ending but I'll do a part 2 if you want.
Reader insert, no reference to reader's body so it can be seen as female, gender neutral and male reader
"All your friends are so cool, you go out every night In your daddy's nice car, yeah, you're living the life Got a pretty face, a pretty boyfriend too I wanna be you so bad, and I don't even know you"
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“Y/n?”
“Earth to Y/n?”
“Y/NNNN!” Hange yelled, pulling you out of your daydream.
“Sh!t sorry. I zoned out, again.” You explained yourself, trying to look anywhere but in your friend’s eyes.
“It’s what you’ve been doing this whole week. Just ask him out already!” She whisper-yelled.
“I don’t know who you’re talking about.” You replied stubbornly.
“C’mon Y/n, you’ve liked him since you first met him! If you don’t tell him how you feel now, you may never get the chance to!” Petra added.
“Thanks a lot you guys…” You said, slumping back in your seat lazily. How were you supposed to tell him, your Captain, Humanity’s Strongest Soldier, The Levi Ackerman, you were in love with him and had been for years now. You’d probably just make it weird and ruin your friendship with him, because no way in hell did he reciprocate your feelings.
“You know what? If you’re not going to tell him, I will!” Hange said resolute and determined to end your suffering. She had been your best friend since you’d graduated from being simple Cadets and knew better than anyone how much you were actually worth though also how much you thought lowly of yourself because of your insecurities and negative thoughts.
“WHAT?! NO!” You didn’t notice you’d raised your voice until you realized everyone was staring at you.
Your face became beet red as you waved it off with a small “Don’t worry, everything’s fine. We’re all fine.” Successfully getting everyone to go back to what they were previously doing.
“I wasn’t lying before, I’ll tell him if you don’t.” She went back to whispering, drawing your attention back to the stressful topic.
“Okay, okay fine. I’ll tell him! I just, need to get us a moment together, the perfect moment. I’ll think about it tomorrow, when I go to my parents’ house.”
Your friends, including Mike, Oluo, Eld and Gunther, high-fived each other victoriously, but were quick to act nonchalant as soon as they saw their Captain approaching you.
“What’s happening? I heard some commotion coming from here just minutes ago.” He asked, eyeing you all with his usual scowl.
Suddenly, your shoes became a very interesting view as Hange quickly answered: “Don’t worry Captain. Nothing happened! Y/n here was just…telling us about a few hand-to-hand combat techniques and discussing them with the team.”
He glanced at your petrified form questioningly, but swiftly came to the decision it was not an important matter.
“Anyways, I wanted to tell you, tomorrow a new member will be joining the Levi Squad, I want you all to welcome her but most importantly make sure to get along with her.” He continued.
You and the rest of the team stared at each other with a shocked expression on your face, though Petra was the first to speak up: “You referred to the new member with a her, so I suppose she’s a girl. Who is she?”
“Yeah, and when will we meet her?” Eld chimed in.
“Her name is Natasha and you’ll all meet her tomorrow morning at training, the rest, you can ask her for yourself.” He answered before retreating back to his office to finish writing the last papers before going to bed.
“Well, that’s new…” Eld said.
“Who even is she? I mean, she must be great with her skills and everything if Levi accepted her in our team.” Oluo said.
“I guess we’ll find out tomorrow. You don’t know anything about this, do you Hange?” Gunther sighed, running a hand through his neatly combed hair.
“I’m just as surprised as you are. How about you Mike?” The scientist returned the question to the silent blonde.
“Don’t look at me! I know about this just as much as you do.” He raised his hands in the air defensively.
“So she’s suddenly joining the team, nobody knows about her and Levi promptly refuses to tell us anything. She sure was able to become the center of attention before even coming.” Erd said.
“Hey Y/n, you okay?” Hange questioned you.
You had zoned out again…This Natasha girl sounded quite mysterious, but most of all, you weren’t accustomed to Levi’s eyes subtly lighting up when he talked about someone.
“Yeah, yeah don’t worry. I’m just tired, that’s all. In fact, I think I’mma head to bed, anybody coming with?” You got up from your seat lazily.
“Nah. I still have a few hours left to enjoy in me. See you in two days, right?” Gunther replied for everyone.
“Yeah.” You walked alone to your bedroom as unanswered questions swirled through your mind, mostly regarding Natasha and Levi. You pushed them down though, because they surely weren’t gonna ruin your free day with your parents.
The next day you woke up early and headed to town, where your parents owned a bakery. Your family’s apartment was right over it and you could still recall how much you used to help your parents when they were at work, sometimes getting scolded for not wanting to go to bed. You didn’t spend as much time there now, but Levi usually left you a few free days per month to visit your parents, and you sometimes also brought the rest of your team with you to have a hearty meal by the fireplace. 
As always, your parents were marveled to see you and the day flew by too quickly. In the blink o an eye, you were back at the Scout’s, going to bed earlier than usual because of the tiredness caused by all the riding.
The next day, you were woken up by a ray of sunshine seeping through your window and illuminating the room.
You saw your companion Petra soundly sleeping on the bed on the other side of the room, so you dressed yourself without making any noise and walked your way to the stables.
“Hello Grass Goblin!” You saluted your hooved friend smirking happily. Her real name was Lily, in honor of the beautiful flowers you put in her hair when you braided it, but you’d had her for so much time you had become besties to the point the nickname rolled off your tongue more naturally than her real name.
You brought your horse out for a ride, fed her and combed her hair into a beautiful braid with a few flowers tucked in between.
Before you’d realized, it wast time for you to go to training, which meant you’d finally get to meet this mysterious Natasha.
You were sure you had arrived on time, nonetheless, the moment you stepped into the training area you found your team, Levi and an unfamiliar blondie chatting loudly and carelessly, as if they had been friends since forever.
To say this whole situation weirded you out was an understatement: your teammates had taken days or even months to warm up to you, and if Levi talked to you now it was only thanks to the years of hard work and missions done for and with him. Nonetheless, they had become best friends with this new chick in what, a day and a half? From where you stood, you could also see Levi smiling. Okay, what? Like, you didn’t even think the word “smile” existed in his vocabulary and suddenly he was there, grinning ear to ear in the face of this new kid?!
You approached the laughing group in a matter of minutes with a weird: “Hey guys!”
The moment they saw you, they all shut up and stopped laughing, turning to look at their shoes or share strange looks with each other.
You shrugged it off: focusing on this situation wouldn’t bring you any good and you still had to figure out a way to talk to Levi about your feelings.
Levi spoke up: “So, for today’s training we’ll divide the team into pairs and do some exercises in the woods. Form the pairs and go grab your horses, we’ll meet there in 10. Oh, and Gunther, you’re coming with me.”
Gunther visibly slumped, shoulders dropping as he prepared himself mentally for hours of scoldings and glares from his Captain.
As soon as Levi was out of range, you hit Gunther lightly in the shoulder, telling him ironically: “C’mon man, wasn’t it your dream to work with the Levi Ackerman?”
“Yeah, until I actually started working with him! He scolds me so much I wouldn’t be surprised if he got angry with me because of my favorite color.”
“What’s your favorite color?” You asked him, heading to the stables once again.
“Blue, yours?”
“Don’t really have one. I like all bright colors equally, though it depends on the day.”
“You know what? I ain’t even gonna ask you questions. Learned my lesson over the years.” He laughed, departing to go get his horse.
Oluo and Erd had formed a pair, and you saw Petra chatting with Anastasia on the other side of the stables, so you went to ask her: “Hi Anastasia! Hi Petra! Would you like to be in pair with me for the exercises?”
“Sorry Y/n, I’m already with Anastasia and we can’t be in three…” She tried to explain herself.
“Because…?” What was up with her? Levi always let you form groups of three with another teammate whenever someone was missing.
“Because we can’t, okay? Stop asking dumb questions!” She basically hissed at you, annoyed.
Okay, what was happening? You’re away for what, a night and a couple of hours and they all hate you out of the blue? You watched as the two girls got on their horses, giggling like two teenage girls and rode off, not even bothering to wait for you.
A wave of sadness washed over you, and you could feel tears welling up in your eyes, yet you took all your strong will and pushed them back, not wanting to show the vulnerable side of you for idiotic situations like this. You had always been very emotional, and nobody before your team and Hange had ever gone out of their way to help you or talk to you. When you’d joined the Cadets you were pretty much of a loner, but Hange had managed to get you out of your shell and you’d learned how to make friends, eventually leading to you befriending the infamous ‘Levi Squad’.
However, you were probably overthinking it all, as usual. Your friends wouldn’t possibly leave you just like this, with no warning or reason whatsoever, right?
You headed to the woods’ entrance, were the rest of your team was awaiting you.
“So, are all the pairs formed?” Levi asked.
“Yeah” Everybody answered, except for you, though he didn’t notice it and went off to explain the exercises to everyone.
The training had been agonizingly long and painful and, as soon as sundown approached, you were all eager to get off your horses, eat something and skedaddle to bed as quickly as possible.
“Hey guys, how about we all have dinner together?” You suggested.
“Sorry Y/n, but me and Natasha wanted to eat together and then chat for a bit.” Petra apologized.
“No can do, me and the boys are going in town. Sorry.” Erd answered.
“Oh…Okay. That’s fine, it’s absolutely fine. I-I mean, it’s not like we don’t already see each other every day right?” You said awkwardly.
Petra offered you an apologetic smile and then went off with her new friend, the boys getting their horses to the stables.
You didn’t exactly know what you would do that night, but perhaps you could wait for Hange to finish her shift at the Lab and have dinner with her.
After hours spent wandering around the huge building, it was finally the time of the end of her shift, so you ran to her study eager to tell her about your day and hear about hers, as you did almost every night.
“Hangeeeee!!!” You exclaimed, barging into her room with a big smile plastered on your face, excitement etched all over your features.
“Hey Y/n!” She responded. There was something off about the way she was acting, and you’d noticed how she was way less happy to see you than usual, so you decided to investigate: “What’s up with you today?”
“Listen Y/n, I’m truly sorry. I know you’ve been waiting for me to finish this job for hours so we could eat together, but I already had something planned tonight and I really don’t want to miss it. You wouldn’t mind if we skipped today’s daily catch up, right?” She pleaded.
You were taken aback, what has happening? You’re absent for a day and suddenly nobody can eat or spend time with you?
“So…?” She asked again, seeing as you’d zoned out.
“Y-yeah yeah, ’s fine don’t worry.” You gave her a tight lipped smile, shutting the door behind you and going outside on a walk to clear your mind.
The next few days were spent like this, everyone seemingly avoiding your presence. Hange had started having more and more plans at dinner so you never actually got to talk, and the rest of your team were just ignoring you, making up fake excuses in order to not spend time with you. However, you’d noticed how they always regrouped with Natasha. One day, you decided you wanted to get to know this new girl, and with only good intentions in your heart, you approached her while she chatted with Petra and Hange. What you didn’t expect, however, was the side eye she gave you, chuckling under her breath and asking: “Who’re you?”
“I’m Y/n, one of your teammates.” You answered.
“Really? Didn’t think Levi would ever choose a comrade so ugly and annoying.” She continued, though facing your two ex-friends now: “C’mon girls. Have you ever seen her actually do anything? She spends all the training just drooling at our Captain.”
You looked at her in utter confusion, turning to your friends as Hange grabbed your wrist and dragged you away from the pathetic blondie.
“Who the fuck does she think she is?” You hissed.
“Hey Y/n, calm down, you’re overreacting. I swear she’s nice, you just need to get used to her.”
“So what, you’re like defending her now?” You scoffed, not wanting to believe your best friend of a lifetime was turning against you.
“Why? Can’t I? She’s my friend.” Hange replied.
“You’re my friend too!” You spat back.
She didn’t say anything, so you took that as your cue to leave.
You locked yourself in your room and didn’t get out for hours, crying and sobbing because it suddenly felt like you were unwanted and unloved, just like the first time you’d come here.
You needed some fresh air, so you decided to head out for a ride with Lily. Just as you got out of the building, you heard some loud chatter and a faint smell of marshmallows coming from the other side of the building.
You followed the noise, realizing it came from the porch were you usually ate dinner around a fire with your friends, before the whole Natasha-thing happened.
You hid behind a pillar, recognizing all your friends’ voices, trying to recompose yourself in order to go see what all this was about without letting your troubled side show.
The first thing you saw were your friends in a circle, rounded around a fire, roasting marshmallow on wooden sticks. The next thing, though, is what hurt you the most: Natasha was sitting on a boy’s lap, kissing him passionately, her marshmallow long forgotten on the ground. As they separated themselves to catch their breath, giggling like high schoolers, you recognized your Captain and love of a lifetime as the one who was kissing her. He was looking at her so affectionately, completely focused on her and with a love sick look in his eyes you’d never seen him with.
Is this what your friends had been doing every night behind your back?
Tears streaming down your face, you stomped in the area, all your friends suddenly noticing your presence as the chatter ended in a matter of seconds.
Nobody dared to look at your fiery eyes, opting to look at the ground instead.
“What is this?” You broke the silence, venom in your words.
Hange was the first one to get up, trying to get your wrist like she always did when she wanted you to calm down. “Y/n please.”
“Oh don’t you Y/n me! You hung out together, leaving me out  for all this time, not even once thinking about asking me to join, when I’ve been inviting you to eat together every single day.” You said, words latched with anger.
“We can explain, please Y/n!” She pleaded you, but you slapped her hand off of you, repelled by her.
“No, we don’t need to explain ourselves to her, do we guys?” Natasha had rose up to her feet, facing you with a smug smirk.
“She’s right Y/n. Can’t we have other friends? Or do we have to spend every second of our lives with you?” Petra argued, going to stand by her new friend.
“Spend every…What the heck you guys? I’m away for one day and you all suddenly hate me?” You were trying as hard as you could to not let your emotions get in the way, but it was noticeable how your voice had cracked mid-sentence.
“We don’t hate you Y/n. We’re just tired…” Gunther answered lazily, not tearing his gaze away from his half burnt marshmallow.
“Of what Gunther? Tired of what?”
“Of you Y/n! Don’t you understand? They’re all sick of you trying to always be the center of attention, you’re useless and you act so childishly and god, you’re so damn emotional!” Natasha said.
You simply stared at them, tears pooling in your eyes and body trembling as your mind wasn’t able to register what was happening. All your greatest fears were coming to life: your friends had turned their back on you and hated you with all their guts. They’d eventually leave you and you’d become the same lonely loser you always had been.
“We’re sorry we had to break it to you this way, but she’s right, Y/n. We’re tired of you.” Erd finally spoke up, his voice lacking the usual warmth you once found comfort in.
It felt like the air had been sucked out of the room. Your chest tightened, a suffocating weight pressing down on you. Their words rang in your ears, over and over again, slicing through you like a thousand tiny blades.
Your lips parted, but no words came out—just a sharp inhale, like a drowning person gasping for breath. Your fingers clenched into fists at your sides, trying to steady yourself, but it was pointless. The trembling wouldn’t stop.
Then, your eyes found him.
Levi stood there, arms crossed, his usual unreadable expression in place. He hadn't spoken, hadn’t even looked at you properly. But what shattered you completely was what he didn’t do—he didn’t defend you. Not once.
Because he didn’t care.
Not about you. Not like you had hoped.
Not like he did for her.
Natasha was standing close to him, too close, her hand brushing against his arm as she smirked at you, victorious. And Levi let it happen. He let her claim him, let her act like she belonged by his side.
A choked sob escaped before you could stop it. You felt the tears spill over, warm against your cheeks as your body moved on its own.
You ran.You pushed past them, ignoring Hange’s desperate call of your name, ignoring the sting of their words echoing in your mind.
Your feet carried you blindly through the hallways of the barracks, past flickering candlelight and empty corridors, until you reached the safety of your dorm.
Slamming the door shut behind you, you collapsed onto your bed, burying your face in your pillow as the sobs wracked your body.
You had never felt more alone.
You had lost them.
And worst of all… you had lost him.
The next day you woke up with a throbbing headache, eyes puffy from all the crying and snot filling your nostrils.
You sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the ground, your heart heavy and tight. You could hear their voices outside your room—Levi and Natasha laughing, talking easily. Your stomach twisted.
The sound of it was enough to send you spiraling into a pit of self-doubt.
You’d spent so much time pushing those feelings down. Trying to convince yourself you were strong, that you weren’t someone to get lost in jealousy, but now, it was impossible to ignore.
You wrapped your arms around yourself, trying to shut out the thoughts that swirled in your mind. Natasha was everything you weren’t. Beautiful. Confident. Easy to talk to. And Levi... Levi always looked at her like she was perfect. You could see it, even when Natasha wasn’t around. It was the way he smiled when she walked into a room, the way his gaze lingered just a little too long.
He’d never look at you like that.
Your fingers ran through your hair, the weight of the realization sinking in. The truth you refused to see until now was clear. Levi would never love you the way he loved Natasha. He wouldn’t even have to think twice about it. Natasha had everything—beauty, grace, strength. All you had were scars, insecurities, and the weight of your own broken heart.
You’d never been able to see yourself the way Levi saw you, and now... now you didn’t know how to make him see you differently. You weren’t enough. You were never going to be enough.
Your breath hitched as you looked in the mirror. Your reflection was a stranger—a girl who had tried so hard to fit in, to pretend she was something she wasn’t, to make herself worthy of the things she could never have. You weren’t Natasha. You’d never be Natasha.
Your fingers brushed the scars that marked your skin—physical reminders of all the things you’d lost, all the parts of yourself you could never get back.
And then there was Levi.
You knew you could never ask him to choose you over Natasha. Natasha was everything you weren’t. She had beauty that drew people in, confidence that made everyone love her. You didn’t have that. You were just... ordinary, bruised, broken.
"He doesn’t love me," you whispered under your breath, your voice barely audible. "He loves her.”
A bitter laugh escaped your lips, and you hated yourself for feeling this way, for being so weak, for letting your insecurities get the best of you. But it was undeniable. Every time you saw the way Levi looked at Natasha, you couldn’t help but feel like you were competing with a version of yourself you could never reach.
Your heart felt like it was cracking. Maybe you’d fooled yourself into thinking he could love you.
Maybe he did, but he would always love Natasha more.
Your chest tightened, the tears starting to blur your vision. You wiped them away angrily.
No, you couldn’t be this girl. You couldn’t let jealousy take over. But the truth was clear now. Levi would never see you the way you wanted him to.
With an agonizingly slow pace, you got ready for today’s mission: you and the rest of the Levi Squad were going to head out of the Walls. You couldn’t leave now, not when the formation included you as a spotter for Titans, but perhaps you could free them of your presence after the mission.
You didn’t go to breakfast, stomach closed and eating having become only a small problem at the end of the list of the things you had to fix, or end, in this case.
With an empty look in your eyes, you headed to the stables, finding your teammates also getting ready for the mission.
They were silent, though for once, you didn’t want to break the silence. You started to realize how much it was valuable: it wasn’t something you needed to fill anymore, but something that filled you.
You sensed their apologetic looks, Natasha’s victorious smile and Levi’s usual cold yet troubled gaze, but you kept your eyes trained on the ground in front of you, or on the surrounding land once you were out of the walls.
As you were returning after a long day of scouting, a group of Titans approached you, running at an insane speed.
“They’re catching up on us!” Petra exclaimed, terror filling the senses of you all.
“What do we have to do Levi?” Natasha asked her new boyfriend.
“We have to keep riding, let’s hope we can reach the walls in time.” He replied.
“We’re never gonna make, they’re running way faster than usual!” Erd said.
“The Captain told us to keep riding, so shut up and do what you’ve been ordered to!” Gunther scolded you, putting everyone back in position.
Suddenly, the Walls came into view: you’d made it, you were going to live!
Your hope was quick to die however, as you looked back and saw the Titans at barely miles apart. They would have reached you before you could make it back.
You were all going to die! You had to do something!
You took a long breath, a peaceful smile appearing on your face.
“Why are you smiling? We’re going to die!” Petra asked you, worried.
“No you’re not. You’re not going to die today…” You’d made your decision, yet deep down, you’d always known. You loved your friends and cared about them too deeply to let them die at the hands of such monstrous creatures. Even though they had all been little sh!ts to you in the past few days, they were all the most loving and caring souls one could find inside the walls. Without looking back, they’d offered their lives, sacrificing their future for a greater good, in order to save Humanity, even though nobody was there to save them. They were skilled warriors and Humanity would already have been destroyed it it weren’t for their work. They were far more valuable than you were, and Humanity couldn’t lose them. You would rather have them and your parents alive but sad, than everybody dead because you didn’t have the courage to do what needed to be done.
“Just know that, I love you guys, and I’ll always carry you in my heart, no matter what you’ve done or said. Oh, and tell my parents I love them too, alright?” You continued your last speech, realization dawning over your friends as they looked back at you in horror.
Too late did they start yelling your name, for you’d already slowed down your horse to a walk, turning to face the group of beasts.
“Keep riding! She’s saving us! Don’t let her sacrifice be in vain.” Levi yelled, urging his horse and companions forward, closer to the walls and further from their friend.
You watched as they disappeared from your view, nothing but little black dots in a sea of green, a few tears trailing down your chin.
This was it, the end. If you’d known you would’ve died so soon, you probably would’ve hugged your parents tighter that day, but it was too late to regret your choices now. Your time had arrived, you may be forgotten, but you would have done your job to keep humanity safe for a bit longer. A determined look fell on your face, as you turned around to face the Titans. You were going to die, you were sure of it, but you sure as heck weren’t going down without a fight!
Hiii! Thank you so much for reading! I hope you've appreciated this post. I'll start working on Part 2 as soon as possible but do tell if you have any specific requests! You're more than welcome to come check out my account with my other posts and/or make requests(MASTERLIST). Do NOT plagiarize this or any of my content.
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Written by crazycat010 © 2025 crazycat010
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