#I wonder if that's where SaB got the idea

[technoturian]

Channel-sailing! Beautiful.

[tryan-a-bex]

100 fics

Today I posted my 100th fic on Ao3!

My first was Pottery; or Function, Purpose and Heart on Mar 11, 2023. It was a retired Dreamling fic with Destruction (who I call Joe) as the main character.

I moved fairly quickly into my Spy x Family crossover series. Anya is so cute, and throwing her in with Dreamling and the Endless family led to a lot of fun shenanigans! (Generally you don't need to know Spy x Family canon to follow these.)

Next I started on my Sandman x Scooby Doo shenanigans! I really like the Scooby Gang, and there are definitely some mysteries to solve surrounding the Endless! (With awesome art by @sab-draws!)

Gaulcienne caught my eye next. Lucienne, my beloved librarian, and the shape-changing dream-fairy? Oh yes! A Quiet Love with Wings has most of my commissioned art, with pieces by @athymelyreply for Sometimes when You Fall, You Fly, @ibrithir-was-here for Fireflies and a Missing Person, and @designtheendless for The Dragon Rider!

King of Night and Prince of Day, for @nathanwonderwolf's wonderful art, has the second highest kudos of all my fics.

Then I invented an OC who is the preteen personification of the consciousness of humanity, aka Social Media. I thought this was pure crack but people liked it and now it's a series! Dinner and Play was created with @carnelianmeluha's food ideas in mind!

My Dreamling works tend to be short and sweet, often prompted by something on tumblr or discord, and are collected as Dreamling vignettes.

I have recently written (but not yet posted) my first honest to god smut, but early dabbles in the craft were mostly crack, like my Helm Fucking Crack series. I'm unreasonably proud of how cracked it is, and thank everyone who enabled me (notably @sleepsonfutons, @windsweptinred, @tickldpnk8, @zzoomacroom, read their fics!).

My obsession with Fuckboi Dream (mind the tags) is ongoing, and included creating a chapter index with notes so I can find things, a series about Murphy's childhood (somebody please read these, they are so cute), and others, fanart as well!

In The Dragon's Tongue, Lucienne takes on Titania! I commissioned @lostelfwriting to write the bdsm continuation of the scene, and she did a fantastic job!

A Reunion in the Dreaming (picnic recreated here) was the first fic in Walking with the Walkers, my series about Rose, Jed and Unity. It features Rose and Ara (Barbie transformed in Life is but a Dream), Rose and Jed meeting their Endless family members, Jed and Gault having adventures, and Unity throwing family parties in the Dreaming (with art by @ilya-halfelven).

Trials of a Shapeshifter in Love (in which Gault tries to surprise Lucienne with a romantic dinner) was my favourite fic from October 2023 -- Femslash weekend (by @sandmanfemslashfans ) and Monsterfucktober (by @seiya-starsniper and friends) made it a really fun month! I also wrote Chantal and Zelda, Johanna and Death, and zombie Lyta (my most angsty fic, I believe).

Just Get Me Off the Damn Mountain was written for designtheendless' contest and omg, I won! It is my most popular fic, at 185 kudos!

I also wrote an OG story for NaNoWriMo! At 23k, Wander Witch is by far my longest story (the next longest is under 9k).

After a bit of being stuck, I got started again by writing continuations of @gabessquishytum's asks! Thank you to Gabe and to all the anons and contributors who allowed me to post their parts of the story!

Asmi, @weirdly-specific-but-ok, argued that he does not have a fandom, so (with permission) I proved him wrong by writing fanfic where he meets Crowley and the Maggot Fam. I love you, Asmi and the maggots!

Heading on an Adventure, the story of Rose and Orpheus' road trip, led to a series of library adventures for Lucienne (often featuring Meowpheus), starting with The Library Cat and continuing in the Lucienne my Beloved series.

I wanted more Lucienne and Walkers content, so I started a side blog, @lucienne-my-beloved, and am open to prompts there! On ao3, the series is called ficlets for lucienne.

Hob Meets the Doctor June 7, 2389 and The line I will not cross and the line I will (Gaulcienne) are my space fics, and I am unreasonably happy about them!

I'm now writing for @augustwritingchallenge! (They got me over 100 in my wips a week or two ago!) I combined prompts so you'll see a fic every 2-5 days in various series and fandoms, including Good Omens (Aug 30) and Dead Boy Detectives (soon).

And my 100th fic! Why are you whispering? a Jed and Rose fic for the late night call prompts. Woohoo!

Thank you so much to everyone who has supported my fandom journey! I'm the least depressed one in my long covid cohort, due to your support and friendship! I cherish every kudo and comment and bookmark and reblog, and the art and fics you all create as well!

[gojonanami]

Sab, my dearest, my beloved, the light of my life,

I know I'm two weeks late (and that a certain professor would be on my ass for it) but I had the wonderful idea of re-reading the whole Prof Geto series before reading part 6, thinking it would make for the best emotional impact and after doing just that I have to say... my hypothesis was correct. There wasn't a single second where I regretted my decision (except, maybe when I had to read the breakup scene again 😭), not a single dull word in the +90k masterpiece you wrote (isn't that the length of a novel!?), the flow of your writing is just so good, the dialogue, the internal conflict of the characters... I loved all of it, Sab. This series holds a special place in my heart and I'll probably read it time and time again in the future ❤️❤️❤️

And this chapter– god. I really have no words, it was just a whirlwind of emotions. I was giggling and kicking my feet in the hair like a teenager and I even cried at some point. I loved the beginning, the raw emotion of seeing each other again after what happened, the longing... the way Suguru and Yuta felt so conflicted about their feelings for the reader, and her getting jealous over Mei Mei... omg.

I also loved how Geto helped her with the citations of her dissertation (they were my worst nightmare during undergrad) and hated how Yuta broke up with her right after she presented it. How could he ruin such and special day like that!!! (Ofc I know it made sense to have it happen right then, but gosh 😭💔) but anyway, regarding Yuta... I love how you've set up his part. I'll love to read it when the time comes ❤️❤️

Oh! And the way Yaga *knew*. Now I can't believe that the whole reader assigned as a T.A thing wasn't tampered by him in some way– he had to play a part in that, and I bet he wasn't too fussed with them sharing a hotel room, as long as Suguru was happy hahah.

And then, the passion in his office, the reconciliation and the ending... I had to stop reading a couple of times because I was getting way too emotional, Sab. It was beautiful. I can't wait to see more of them in the extra credit fics (!!) I really hope you make a proposal one <3

I wanted to thank you for writing this series, I've loved it more than I could ever expect to and I believe it came to me in a point of my life where it just... made sense. I was stressed and unsure about continuing in academia and I believe I told you a few months back that I was applying to grad school... well, I got accepted and then hired as a research assistant at the same university!! This is as close as it gets to me living reader's life though I'll keep living vicariously through her for a while longer, I think.

Anyway– I believe I'm babbling now. I just want to thank you again for writing this wonderful series. I'm so excited for Prof Gojo and all the wonderful things you'll write in the future, Sab ❤️

baby, love of my life, the sun to my earth

haha I think prof geto would more than forgive you — especially after the diligent work you did rereading — dare I say he would be very impressed—and I am too omg

I cannot believe you read all 90K+ that’s insane and it means so much to me 😭🥹 thank you so much — it truly means the world to me because I had so much fun writing it!! it was really a special series to me and will continue to be as I write more extra credit fics :).

ahhh I can’t believe you cried �� I’m sorry but also thank you haha. it’s the biggest compliment 😭🥹 I really wanted to convey both yuta and suguru’s conflicted emotions — and I’m glad they came across 😭 writing mei mei was so fun because it was very spur of the moment — and I love jealous reader 🥹🫣

citations are truly a nightmare and when I thought of the idea to have that be reader’s crisis, it was so perfect because I think so many of us in academics can relate to that 😭 we all deserve a suguru. I can’t wait to write yuta!!! it’s def gonna have stuff from prof Geto like the repercussions of his relationship with reader and it will be fun :)

hahah yaga knowing was also spur of the moment — it just felt full circle since so many times he’s also pulled them apart in some way 😭😭😭

thank you 🥹💕 I’m glad you enjoyed the reconciliation scene — it was so important to me to get that so right. and I really took my time and I’m glad you think I got it right 🥹💕💕I’m def writing the proposal!!! Don’t worry :)

aww baby thank you for reading 😭🥹 I’m so glad this series could help you in any small way that it did. omg I do remember and that’s amazing!!!! Congratulations I’m so so proud of you (and professor geto is too)!!!

writing this series also came at the perfect time for me because it just was such a wonderful thing to post a new part and see everyone’s reactions — it truly made my day. I especially loved your asks as well 🥹💕

thank you for being here and sticking around. I can’t wait to start writing more of professor gojo — I think you guys will really like it 🫶🥹💕

[justanotherstory]

Y.J.H.D

Sooo..long time no see huuhhh!! ..well I was quite busy with some school stuff and exams uk.. #studentlifestruggles (also I was out of ideas :)) anyways “Rukawat ke liye khed hai.." and maybe main ab aur"consistent" ho jaau!!

I have quite a few stories which I thought I'll write about..my maths board exam day, Teachers' day'23 with my lovely seniors..and my first open mic!! But but but ....since I am lazzy and have this very unnecessary amount of chull..I'll talk about something else today.

Today let's talk about the cult, the classic..GenZ ke "yeh hamare zamane ki movie hai" wala movie everyone's favourite YJHD!!!..Who doesn't like this movie!!??? Everyone one has their own learnings and memories from Yeh Jawaani hai deewani..The movie which gave us Bunny..the movie that taught us "kabhi kabhi kuch paane ke liye kahi se nikalna bhi zaroori hai".. I mean you already know how beautiful that movie is..

Yeah so, just like everyone, even I have my own interpretation of this movie.. and I will  share that today ig(although no one asked for it). After watching the movie(which was during the lockdown)I wondered about the origin story of Bunny, Aditi, Avi and Naina Talwar!!..like how someone named Kabir Thappar became Bunny?  "Woh sab dost bane kaise!!!???" And soo many more questions...so I decided to write up the answers to all these questions in a way I wish them to be..

Okay so imagine the story like this...

Its the first day of first grade everyone's just looking up at the new faces all around and the little kids are just fighting for the first bench..and then enters the "heartbeat" .. the one who will be unknowingly responsible for all the classroom madness, Kabir already shouting and giggling and waves to Avinash, who has already saved a seat for him.. and after talking a bit about how they spent their holidays. They see a girl fighting on the very first day with a boy who took her pencil.And then arrives the teacher who is already up for a challenge in her head. She then observes a quite girl sitting at the corner seat looking out of the window.. So she asks the "warrior kinda girl"-Aditi to sit with this dandelion-kid ,Naina and in her head Aditi is singing up for a punishment coz sitting with Naina is like sitting with a bronze statue who she knows will hardly talk to her and then Bunny convinces Avi to sit near the window at a vacant seat behind these girlies..

But that one fine day, when Kabir pulled Aditi's chair and she fell down and everyone laughed , she shouts at Kabir and is just about to cry when she yells "main tumhari teacher ko complain krungi !!" and this marks the beginning of a cold war between Aditi and Kabir.  Everytime Kabir would find ways to tease Aditi and she would also fight him back. Their banters were a constant source of entertainment for the whole classroom. They acted as the most obidient students in front of the teachers but as soon as they left, during the break time, the classroom would turn into a wrestling ring where they fought with Avi being the refree. Avi was their mediator , woh best friend bhale hi Kabir ka ho, pr Aditi se dosti bhi pakki thi and Naina, Naina would just remain quiet and look at all that choas  and long for such friends. The always fighting duo didn't have any hate for each other rather when put together they would make the strongest team.. Months went by... and Kabir became "Bunny" soon after the day of their second grade picnic when he boasted to Aditi saying "agar darr lage na ..toh mera hath pakad lena.."and then daar bhi laga aur haath bhi pakda.. Kabir ne ... Aditi ka kyunki woh ek bunny se daar gya tha ...and hence Bunny. But its not like Aditi wasn't given a name she was called "magnet " why you may ask.. coz the other magnet was Avi! Weird right..ik..even Aditi felt the same when se got to know about the "other magnet" years later..

Samay ka pahiyaa ghumta gaya.. Naina, Aditi, Avi, Bunny grew upp.. Now the warriors weren't fighting all the time rather they became best of friends and now Avi , Bunny and Aditi became a trio.. Naina and Avi also became good friends since Naina was the one who always helped Avi cheat in exams. Soo yeah you may say that exams were the reasons they became friends but it wasn't the only reason for their friendship although the movie plot showed Naina had feelings for Bunny , but with Avi she felt like home. With Avi she felt like she has escaped from all her life problems all the maddness and all the sufferings" ek sukoon tha uski baaton mei.." I am not trying to ship them together but its just that a best friend like Avi is what we all need .Later on maybe Naina and Avi lost connection maybe their this friendship didn't last long and maybe Naina didn't even try to hold him back as her friends leaving her alone wasn't something new for her and she was so tired of trying that she started blaming herself and then became more silent.. and maybe that's why the movie didn't highlighted Naina and Avi's friendship much.

Few years later,Bunny and Aditi slowly drifted away..something happened between Avi , Bunny and Aditi maybe something so extreme that none of them had imagined.  What could have happened? Maybe Bunny shattered Aditi's trust . Friendship with Bunny was her super power but when suddenly someone snatched that away, she could never trust anyone like that again. Avi tried again  and again to bring them closer but naah the scar was soo deep that won't heal easily although it seemed that everything was sorted but it wasn't the trust that had gone never came back and that's why when in the movie she  sends the video invite to Kabir she is a bit hesitant and nervous and didn't even expected him to be their at their big day.

But heyy, everything did sort between all four of them as we move towards the end in the movie right!!? And after the movie ends they all lived their happily ever after.. together all 6 of them Naina-Bunny, Aditi-Tarun and Avi- ? Avi with??? Well some mysteries are better left unsolved..

Hope you enjoyed this blog and plan to rewatch the whole movie now:)

This was just another story.

And this is me,

Singing Off <<33

[bisluthq]

I don't mean to change the topic but I was just wondering about the new Gracie Tay collab and I saw the video of them writing it together and I'm having thoughts. Like first of all the Cowboy Like Me reference is insane because WHY lmao when it's clearly not about Matty...Tay loves her misdirections (The Alchemy is not about Travis change my mind)

Also the "give it 10 months and you'll be past it" is very Clean-esque to me. I know for a fact that Clean is about Jake G because she did NOT give that many fucks about the british teenager to write THAT song about him.

The 29 years old again. The bridge is literally verbatim the description of the dude in All Too Well. My only problem is that why would there be so many Taylor references on a Gracie album even if blondie wrote it?

I get that we think it's about DOB but the streets are saying it's all speculation, plus he was hanging out with Taylor as late as after Joever, and he already had the Paris gf by then so it just doesn't make any sense. If he dated and ghosted Gracie BEFORE that, why on earth would he still be cool with Taylor?

The timeliness make no sense to me...he definitely had a thing wth Sab but that's about it. Him scoring both the Taydaughters sounds like fanfiction to me I'm sorry.

My theory is genuinely that the song is very Folklore adjacent wherein it's not about any particular real life event but instead a fictional narrative inspired by true occurrences. The song SCREAMS Gyllenswift in every shape and form. Maybe Matty slightly.

The video where they're writing it is very clearly them coming up with lyrics that suit the song and it's not that serious idk.

People are very defensive about it being Matty coded but like who gaf Tay has a whole double album about his ass

I’m defensive about it being about Matty/Jake because it’s GRACIE’s song. To me it’s predominantly about Gracie and Gracie’s experiences and life. I think Taylor could relate to what she’s going through and contributed but I just don’t see Taylor sitting down with her mentee and writing predominantly about her own life - I’m sure she contributed things she related to but idk. It’s just odd to me that when Taylor collabs on a song then everyone assumes it’s more about her but when people collab with her it stays more about her. Like a great example is EHC which definitely has Ed’s ideas on it but everyone tries to match it entirely with a Taylor boyfriend/hookup/person. I think it’s more an idea Taylor had but Ed added to it. SOTB is another one - it’s definitely inspired by an idea Taylor had but it’s got a lot of Lana’s flourishes on it. So to me us is Gracie’s idea with Taylor’s flourishes. If it was more her idea she’d have released it ft. Gracie Abrams and scored bigger numbers ykwim? Gracie releasing it suggests it was more Gracie’s thing.

[where-theres-smoak-2]

Vesperass and I were discussing how unlike all the Darklina kisses the lukewarm M*lina kiss in the teaser not only lacked chemistry, but Alina's passionate response. Jessie said they wanted to show Alina felt comfortable with Aleksander and bold enough to make the first move and match his fire. I didn't see any of that with Mal, who was clearly the aggressor while Alina seemed to going through the motions at best. Also, Aleks talked to Alina as an Equal via the tether and not a "symbol."

(Book Spoilers)

I mean its such a short clip that its difficult to tell but I didn't get the impression it was overly passionate and those darklina kisses are hard to beat. But to be fair we don't yet know the context or whether that's the start of the kiss or the end etc. To be honest my general reaction to it was kind of meh, it was there. Like most of their scenes I just found it was bland, it didn't make much of an impression on me. What did strike me the most about the m*lina kiss though is that nobody seems that excited by it, I mean people aren't even really talking about it, I think I've seen 4-5 posts of someone being excited for it. Maybe I am wrong but I feel like if that had been a darklina kiss then there would have been alot of chatter in the tags about it. This lack of reaction to the kiss is a problem considering M*lina are supposed to be the main romance for the show, people should be excited to see a kiss in the trailer but M*lina just aren't that popular. They were instead overshadowed by the new characters and the six of crows. There seems to be alot of people who are worried about how they are going to work the SoC into the SaB plot with many who'd rather they just make a Six of Crows spin off. I don't want to be too negative but honestly it does make me a little worried because if they mess up things with the Six of Crows and you've got M*lina, an unpopular ship, as a main romance then people may just stop watching and if people stop watching then the show might face the netflix axe.

I've also got the feeling that the showrunners are aware that M*lina isn't very popular and are going to try and make them more popular by throwing in a load of kisses and even intimate moments between them, using this idea that sex sells to generate some excitement around the pairing. I could be wrong, but if I am right then I am not sure if that strategy would work, if people just don't find the couple interesting I don't think having them kiss a bunch is going to change that.

I do think the reaction to this season will also depend on how they deal with Aleks' character and darklina tether bonds as, whether people like it or not, they are one of (if not the) most popular characters/ships in the show. If they do make Aleks this 2d villain with nonsensical motivations then that's going to turn people off too. As a side note I did see a couple of posts wondering if the kiss might actually be the scene where the darkling disguises himself and kisses Alina but in all honesty I hope not. That scene was such a mess and if they keep it then it'll be a complete contradiction to what they set up in season 1 of Aleks asking for and caring about consent. Personally I hope they just leave that scene out all together. I also hope that they don't cut back on the tether bond scenes and they do make it clear that it works when they both are thinking of the other and want to see each other. I am just hoping that they don't totally ruin everything.

But only time will tell I mean this is going off of 30 secs worth of footage, we could get a really great season with lots of great darklina moments, good character development and exciting six of crows moments, with everyone working seamlessly together.

[swanimagines]

TEASERS FOR UPCOMING KAZ X READER PIECES

Just a fair warning that all of these are unedited text so when they eventually come out, their wording might be different (or then not because sometimes I don't find anything to make better). I haven't finished any of these fully but here's shreds of what's to come. Strawberry will most likely be the first to come out as a full version :)

Also just a note that writing these with Kaz has made me realize that sometimes it's better if I modify the wording of the prompt or execute the prompt differently than people usually do since a lot of my prompts are very non-Kaz or then my idea doesn't carry with Kaz being the one saying that in-character part.

Teasers under the cut! And any feedback could be greatly appreciated since a) that improves my writing and b) that motivates me to write more & faster and c) you get a free smile for making my day!

PINEAPPLE 🍍| @oofkay @ilovemarvelanne1 @dancingwith-sunflowers + two anons (B13. “I’m not the person you want in your life.” “Yes you are.” and B85. “Why do you care?” “Because I love you!”, gn reader)

(I had a temptation to put a 500 word piece here but figured it's too much for a "teaser", sorry if this ends abruptly)

“Kaz, I really don’t want to listen to your lecture right now.” you groaned and winced as you shifted on the bed. “This was my own fault. I should have stayed put.”

“Yes, you should have.” Kaz muttered and looked at your arm and rib, neatly wrapped in gauze. He took a long breath in. “You could have gotten killed.”

“I know.” you muttered back and sighed, squeezing your eyes shut as your sigh stung your lungs. “But that’s the life I chose when I joined the Dregs. You don’t survive in the Barrel by doing nothing.”

“Yes, but you were reckless, it would have been a pointless death and you could have avoided it easily.” he answered and met your gaze. “You can’t be like that on heists.”

“Why do you care so much, Kaz?” you asked, and Kaz averted his eyes from yours on that instant. “We got the kruge, didn’t we? We got away without pursuers, and I didn’t even put anyone else in danger.”

You stared at him, silently demanding for an answer. The heist had been successful, and your injury was your own fault. Nothing irreversible had happened.

“I protect my investments.” he finally told you, and you groaned.

WATERMELON 🍉 | @thefandomplace @madeofsilkandsteel (where reader is in the room when Pekka's men come for him in episode 2 of SaB and Kaz has to hide his desire to protect her, fem!reader)

“Don’t touch her!” he wanted to scream as he looked at that big guy taking a firm hold of your hair, yanking your hair back as he held a knife to your throat. But instead, he remained silent. He couldn’t let Pekka know that you were his weak link, because then you would be used as his pawn.

These times, he really wished that he was still that boy who hadn’t even met you. The boy who didn’t feel anything for anyone and would have been able to sacrifice anyone for his own profit. If he would still be that boy, you would be safe. You wouldn’t have been in his office to calm his nerves with angering Inej. You wouldn’t be held in place by some brute who could slit your throat with a flick of a wrist.

STRAWBERRY 🍓 | anon + @itsemy01 (reader is estranged from her father Pekka Rollins and decides to go to Kaz who she knows hating Pekka and hopes that he would help her take him down, again I couldn't decide where to cut it down so have a longer teaser, fem!reader)

You had heard about Kaz Brekker, who had a war going on with your father. You didn’t know what Pekka had done, why this Brekker despised him so much and your father was just as oblivious about that. He sometimes wondered about it aloud, sure different gangs were always competing with each other, trying to get the most territory, but this Kaz Brekker looked at Pekka with so much anger and despise that it wasn’t just a regular intimidation technique between gangs. It was like he actually held some personal grudge against your father, but your father said he had never even heard about anyone called Kaz Brekker before him.

But Kaz Brekker was your best bet against your father. You wouldn’t be able to take him down on your own, so now you were on your way to the Crow Club, silently praying to the Saints that they would believe you and not shoot you on sight.

A bulky doorman and his slightly thinner, but still muscular partner blocked your way to the Crow Club. You were soaked in rain, shivering from cold and your body begged you to get somewhere inside, but you had decided to get to the Crow Club, even with force if needed.

You knew it was a stupidly lucky shot, but you just marched up to them and told them about your business - you wanted to speak with Kaz Brekker.

"And why would Y/N Rollins want to speak to a man who is planning to kill her father?" the man scoffed, clearly thinking it was just a trick. You glared at him.

"I'm here to make a deal, I'm not here to answer to you." you answered and the doorman huffed, crossing his arms before leaning towards his partner.

"Get the boss."

BANANA 🍌 | anon (C67. “You did a bad thing for a good reason.” “But is it worth it if they died because of me?”, a bit shorter than others because I have only written 164 words of this in total and began writing straight from the middle of the drabble, gn reader, warnings: mentions of children dying)

You had been left with no choice. It was either Inej and Jesper or that family, and you had lunged for your friends, having to watch how a whole family had gotten slaughtered. In any other case, you would have lunged for the family because Inej and Jesper would be more than capable to defend themselves, but not in this case. In this case, they had been injured. You would have had to sacrifice them, of course you chose them. But you couldn’t erase the echoes of the innocent kids screaming in pain from your mind.

MANDARIN 🍊 | @emberheart (where Kaz is secretly seeing his sister and making sure she's safe and the Crows find out, completely unedited text and just brain vomit, probably rewriting this part but this was the only part which doesn't give away too much, fem!reader)

You were the only one who remembered the time when he was just that sweet little boy who always protected you. The whole thing with Pekka and Jordie had scarred him for life, and for a long time, you were the only one he found a family within, who he cared about. You had changed your name too to protect yourself and lived in a nice house at the better side of Ketterdam. Kaz visited you late at night thrice a week, and extra times if you needed it. You lived at the quietest part of the better area, but visiting you in broad daylight would have been far too dangerous, and Kaz wouldn’t do it unless it would be an extreme emergency. Fortunately that kind of a situation had never occurred.

He had made it clear years ago that you can’t come with him to the Barrel. He knew it would be dangerous for you - if anyone got to know that Dirtyhands had a sister… Kaz didn’t even want to imagine what could happen then. He had buried his feelings long ago, but with you he let Kaz Rietveld peek around the corner. You made him black coffee, and your way was Kaz’s favorite. He didn’t exactly know what you did with the coffee or if it was just the different type of beans. He stayed at your home for an hour or two at a time, checking everything is okay and just talking about how you’ve been. You could open up to him, and when you were sick, he dropped by more often. Kaz knew that there was always a risk of someone seeing him visiting you regularly, but he trusted he was being careful.

APPLE 🍎 | @thereagles (B57. “I heard [name] has a crush on you.” and B92. “Are you cold? Here, take my jacket.”, again I have modified B92, gn reader)

Kaz looked at you shivering beside him in the cold night, and frowned. “Are you cold?”

He knew it was a stupid question, and he wanted to roll his eyes at himself. Of course you were cold. And the look on your face told him the same thing.

“What does it look like?” you retorted, and Kaz pursed his lips. He knew you didn't mean to use that tone with him, you were just cold and frustrated that Jesper took so long. You heard Kaz shifting a little bit and turned your head to him, and saw him taking off his jacket. He stood up and flopped it on your shoulders, immediately bringing the welcomed warmth. You looked at him with wide eyes, and Kaz seemed to regain his composure.

“I can’t afford you getting cold.” he stated before sitting back on the crate. “We might have to sit here for awhile.”

PEAR 🍐| @nomournersnofunerals21 E27. Waking up after a nightmare, fem!reader

Despite Kaz knowing how such nightmares felt like, he didn’t really know how to comfort you. You were covered in sweat and getting your erratic breathing in control, but your eyes still held that look of terror. Kaz tried to think something to say, but he couldn’t think of anything. So he just sat beside the bed, placing his cane in between his legs.

If Kaz was anyone else, you both being quiet in such situation would have been weird or awkward, but you knew Kaz enough to know that him sitting there and not just leaving after seeing you were physically alright was his way to comfort you. He was wordlessly telling you that you’re safe and at the Slat. You weren’t there in the middle of a heist, forced to watch your best friend bleeding out.

Kaz felt guilty about making you go through that. You and your best friend were almost inseparable, and a heist he had planned had went south after a guard had left the duty to make out with his girlfriend in that very room where they were performing a heist. Your friend hadn’t reacted quickly enough and they had been shot.

KIWI 🥝 | @imabirrrb D18. Birds + D17. Smile, gn reader

You smiled - the crows jumped to your lap, came to sit on your shoulders and trusted you throughly. You had sat on the rooftop for years, earning their trust and now you were basically one of them. They nuzzled your head with their own, they were smart and affectionate. Some had even learned their names.

Kaz stood by the rooftop door, watching you smiling at him as you stood up from the ground, making the crows fly away. They had learned to know by now what it meant when you stood up, and you had feathers on your shoulders and head. Kaz reached out, carefully helping you tidy up before he smiled at you briefly, earning a dazzling smile from you.

Crows were your friends just as much as the human-Crows were, and that was one of the things Kaz loved in you.

COCONUT 🥥 | anon, based on "I Hate U I Love U" by Gnash and Olivia O'Brien (I misinterpreted the lyrics and badly so this part most likely won't be in the final fic)

You just couldn't help but stare at him when he laid out his newest heist plan, admire how he talked and how he had worked on that. And you always hoped that he would glance at you for more than a fraction of a second.

Jesper had told you to tell about your feelings to Kaz, but you always brushed him off with a laugh. Kaz liking you back? You? Maybe in a fairytale world. Jesper insisted that you could be surprised, but you were too stubborn for your own good.

You wanted to hold the bastard's hand so badly, you wanted to tell him that he's so much more than just a boss to you. That you had loved him ever since he had saved you from the streets when you were both just teenagers. He had saved your life and you would eternally be grateful for it, but it felt like you were going under with your feelings as you had tried to drown them for years.

Sure there were some signs of him caring about you differently than other Crows, but you had brushed them all of as foolish hopeful thinking. But the look on Jesper's face when you looked at Kaz, when Kaz and you sat in the same table made you think that maybe he knew something.

And he did. Kaz had accidentally confessed his feelings toward you once when Jesper had questioned him why he isn't sending you to scout the next heist location. Kaz thought it was far too dangerous for you and had told Jesper that he can't risk you and that he'll think of something else. He was worried about you.

But there you were, two fools in love, too stubborn to admit it.

There you go, the requested fruit teasers! I hope you liked them and I hope I'll get the full versions out asap c:

And I'll repeat: any feedback could be greatly appreciated since a) that improves my writing and b) that motivates me to write more & faster and c) you get a free smile for making my day!

[jimmys-zeppelin]

hello, all! so I was suggested by the wonderful, ever-talented @jonesyjonesyjonesy to do a fun little writing thing where I share six sentences (give or take) of an upcoming story or chapter of a story. well, frankly I thought this was a lovely idea and that I MUST participate.

SO here is a (not six sentence) peek into my upcoming 90s jimmy fic titled moonbeam. I am very nervous and excited for you all to read it. here's a small blurb I just came up with this week that I really wanted to share. please enjoy!

Sabrina sat at the island counter in the center of the kitchen, about ten or so bottles of nail polish surrounding her and a small bag where another handful were being held. The brunette meticulously filed her nails, bending her fingers in every which way to get her desired nail shape. Jimmy walked in, yanking open the refrigerator door and practically climbing inside. The rustling coming from inside made her look over at him.

"Have we got any of those goodies left from France...? Can't seem to find them anywhere..." Jimmy asked, almost dejectedly.

"Which goodies? There's the macaroons, macarons, crème brûlée, madeleines, ec—" Sabrina started, getting cut off by Jimmy when he popped his head out of the fridge.

"Say that again," He said, a smirk building across his features.

"Say what? Madeleines?" she tilted her head.

"No, the one before." he chuckled.

"Crème brûlée?" she asked, making sure her French accent was up to par, eyeing Jimmy cautiously. She swiped the file across her nail a few more times before setting the tool down.

"Yes. You say it like a proper Frenchwoman." Jimmy said, approaching her like a predator stalking its prey. He took her face in his hands, pressing a soft kiss against her lips with a smile upon his pulling away. "What are you up to then?"

Sabrina stared into his deep green eyes, breaking out in a smile before picking up her emery board again and continuing on filing her nails, "gonna paint my nails. Which color do you like best of these four?"

Jimmy considered his options carefully; the contenders being red, black, blue, and a nude pink. Kissing her temple, he picked a color, placing a finger on the top of the lid, "Black," he whispered, "The color of night."

"You mean, noir?" she replied dramatically, picking up the bottle and considering it, "okay, only if you let me paint yours too."

"Oh, then I'll pick the pink."

"Jimmy." Sabrina whined.

"No, Sabrina. I will not have my nails painted."

"David Bowie painted his nails."

"I—" Jimmy started, interrupting himself at the mention of his old friend, "That doesn't mean anything."

"Brian May painted his nails."

"As an aesthetic!" Jimmy shot back.

"Please." Sabrina begged, jutting out her bottom lip and putting on her best puppy-dog face.

"Sab..." He replied tentatively, as if she were a child that needed scolding.

"Moony..." She said, mirroring his tone.

He looked about ready to push back even further, but after staring into her whiskey-brown eyes, it seemed to wear him down and he knew she wouldn't back down from this fight. Jimmy huffed, grabbing a stool from behind him and taking a seat. He gave Sabrina his hand. "Do it."

Sabrina squealed excitedly, wrapping her arms around him and pressing a long, hard kiss to his jaw, "Yay! Lemme file your nails first, then we can get to painting." she said, flipping the nail file over to its opposite side and getting to work on his fingers.

There was a lull in their conversation, the only sound in the room being the emery board being hard at work. Sabrina piped up a few seconds later, "what was the dessert you were looking for, my love?"

"Oh," Jimmy answered, pondering the question for a few seconds, having completely forgotten that that was the reason he'd come into the kitchen in the first place. "Those coconut ones."

"Ah, the macaroons." Sabrina said, "you finished them last night when we drank the last of the chardonnay."

"Did I? Don't remember that..."

"You said 'these are mine, you can't have any' and ate them in front of me." She said, sounding falsely irritated from his statement.

"Sounds more like you than me." Jimmy said, his tone dead serious. Sabrina's eyes trailed higher to meet his, a furrowed look to her brows. A nearly imperceptible smile started at the corner of his mouth.

"I'll fuck your nails up right now." Sabrina threatened.

"I'd love to see you try." Jimmy replied as she continued filing, moving onto another finger.

She grumbled, focusing on his nails again, a quiet, "old man" leaving her before snorting out a laugh, Jimmy mirroring her it just before she reached for her base coat of nail polish.

and there you have it!! god my palms are sweaty. this story has been my baby for nearly six months now and I have it so near and dear to me that I feel like a cagey parent when I talk about it 🥵 this is much more on the milder side of things with sab and jimmy so I really cannot wait for you all to see more of them (wink wonk). anyway, I've talked enough. thank you all so much for reading this far, I love every single one of you!!

[greensaplinggrace]

not you saying the list of darklina gics you're gonna recommend is not a lot and then belting out essays about 15 fics lmao, it was great <3. Also i'm curious if you want to share you said you're writing multiple fics rn, could you share with us a little about them ?

I'm so glad you liked the list! 💕 I had a lot of fun making it and got the chance to ramble about my favorite writers a bit XD. I'll admit that I actually pulled out a lot more fics than I thought I would lol, so at least it wasn't as short as I'd worried. Although it's still a lot less than I would usually read in a fandom where I wasn't writing fic.

I'd love to share a bit about the fics I'm writing! I have a lot of AUs and ideas in my WIP folder, but I'm currently only really engaging with a few right now.

Born to Be [Redacted] is my biggest WIP at the moment. It's a Malarklina Rapunzel/Tangled Fusion AU wherein the Darkling is stuck in a tower and Malina are chaotic and decide to break him out.

Of course, the Darkling is nowhere near as innocent as Rapunzel, and Mal and Alina are a lot more capable than they were at the start of SaB. It's got a fun play on power dynamics and learning to trust and hurt/comfort tropes, plus a good balance of darker elements and lighter elements. There's going to be adventure and romance and a whole lot of fucking over the Ravkan monarchy 💕

Inch By Inch We Drown Ourselves is a long Malarklina smut fic that has once more gotten away from me and become more complex and emotional than I ever intended for it to be.

Mal and Alina are together and married in an open relationship when Mal brings Aleksander Morozov home for a one night stand. The sex is mind-blowingly good, and Alina eventually joins in as the night progresses. The next morning, when Mal and Alina wake up, Aleksander is gone but he's left his number.

For a few days, they don't call him and their lives return to normal. But then, after a particularly wild night, they invite him over again. And then again. And again. And again. And once he's become a part of their lives, there's no stopping the chaos that follows.

It's got a lot of soft BDSM elements, and explores the very slow and gradual process of Aleksander, who is usually very dominant in bed, learning to give up control with people he trusts.

At the Foot of Her Altar is a short and very dark Darklina fic. It's a lot less down to earth than the other ones, and has a bit of a focus on existential morality.

General Aleksander Morozov worships Sankta Alina, Goddess of the Sun, Goddess of Life and Virtue. Everyday he kneels at her altar, blood on his hands, and prays.

Backwards Acceleration is a WIP that I haven't quite figured out the endgame couple for yet. It's leaning towards Malarklina or Darkblade at this point, but could very well go Darklina. And it's basically just a very elaborate role reversal AU.

Aleksander meets Mal when he's younger. They grow up together as friends, and they both decide to join the army when they come of age. For a few years, they train and rise in ranks and go on missions, getting put in separate units and often spending time apart.

Then they're both set to cross the Scorched Wastes, and an attack on their train forces Aleksander to expose his powers. He's taken to the Exalted Sanctuary, where grisha are brought to be protected and train as priests, separate from the rest of the world.

But Aleksander is a fighter. He does not cower. He does not hide. And the best kind of defense is not one where you lock yourself away, frightened by your enemies; it is one where your enemies aren't ever alive to be a threat to you in the first place.

Now all he must do is convince Sankte Alina that the best place for her to protect her people is not behind the walls of a holy church, but instead on the throne.

Meanwhile, Mal is left wondering just how deep into trouble his friend has gotten, and why he ever attached himself to such a disaster of a person in the first place.

---

I also have a few prompts that I've been working on, plus the second chapter to We Have All the Time in the World. Some of the other AUs, like the Guardian Angel AU and the Con-Artist AU and the Time Travel AU, are going to start being written after I've completed everything else. Unless I'm suddenly and unfortunately struck by inspiration for something that I haven't already almost completed lol.

Anyways! That's just some of what's going on right now in terms of my fics! 😅 I hope you like it so far.

[balanchine-ballet-master]

Toni Bentley on Serenade

The following is an excerpt from Toni Bentley’s new book, Serenade.

At 8:04, everything is secure, in place. It’s all I’ve got, all I can control. Once the ballet begins, who knows? The variables are endless—the tempos, the new girl, a blown light in the fourth wing, a slip. A slip that could end in tearful embarrassment, or end your career completely with a torn Achilles tendon, or a chipped hip bone. We were dancing on the edge before we knew what it was. But we knew where it was. And so I learned early on that everything, anything, that is beautiful is perched on a precipice. Mr. B just placed us there, and it was trust in him that gave us balance.

“Places, please, ladies!” In rehearsals we’re “girls,” but onstage we’re “ladies.” Rarely “women.” Modern dancers are women: they don’t dance on their toe tips, and they have been to college. We haven’t. We have barely finished high school. It’s the late 1970s. Some outsiders like to highlight the backstage use of “girls” to illustrate how ballet dancers are infantilized, belittled. But they miss the point entirely. We are classical ballet dancers, which is vocation not gender, novices in Balanchine’s ministry. We are unconcerned with words, much less semantics—physical manifestation is our sole interest. Besides, we are girls. I am not yet twenty.

This is it. I am alone onstage. With sixteen others. Each so alone. Together. Seventeen pairs of parallel, silky peach toe shoes (we wear Freeds, which are English; Capezios are American and pale pink, rather bourgeois—except Allegra Kent preferred Capezios, but then she proved the exception to every rule) lined up side by side, so sweet, as in a dance shop window. This is so unusual for a ballet dancer: we are always turned out, heels together, toes at opposing ends, a flat line. But for Serenade, in the beginning—as in Eden—we are in that parallel, like ordinary mortals. It is harder to balance, really, and there is such an urge for the feet to pivot, for the toes to pop apart. So strong is our training that parallel feels positively pigeon-toed.

I grab the crisp tulle and pull it up flat against my tighted legs, look down and line up my feet, inside ankles locked together, and then let loose the tulle, refluffing it to remove any finger indents or creases while not budging my feet. My head is turned ever so slightly to the right and the cheek barely tilted, ear toward to the shoulder. Mr. B always told us to turn the cheek as if waiting for a kiss. The kiss of fate, the kiss he might bestow. Being so young, we didn’t know we had already been kissed, being there with him and all.

The left arm hangs down soft and loose. Right arm up, to the side but a little to the front, palm upward and facing away, fingers soft and separated, middle one heading toward the thumb but not touching. A salute. A protection.

Head and eyes follow the arm, looking toward the uplifted hand. But everything is only hinted at. This arm has been here, there, for nearly ninety years now since Balanchine made this ballet—girl after girl after girl after girl holding her arm in that place. Mine is there now, holding that invisible torch like the Olympic flame. Holding it there until the curtain rises and still after that. Inextinguishable.

I feel so isolated out here, supported only by air. What a profession to have chosen! No wonder my parents thought college was a good idea. Fifteen years of daily training, 22,000 hours at the barre, and I feel like I might just keel over. Squeeze the pelvis tight, grounding, torso up, lifted, reaching. I think of Muriel Stuart, one of my teachers at the School of American Ballet (SAB), who had studied with Anna Pavlova in England, saying in class in her haughty British accent, “Lift up, and softly drop down.” While she said this, she would place two very firm and pointed fingers right under one buttock and dig in mightily, the “lift up” part (that grounds), while placing her other hand firmly on the shoulder, the “drop down” part (that lifts). Ballet is based on physical contradiction—turnout of the hips being its central paradox—and this defiance is one route to the ethereal.

Mr. B appears now, in his dark gray sports jacket and yellow silk cravat, in the first wing on stage right. This is where he stands night after night. It is his wing, right next to the stage manager’s giant, black, flashing computer motherboard. No one else stands there, though there is no rule, no sign. He bends his right elbow, leaning it along the two-inch-wide horizontal wood plank that braces the back of the wing. He props his face on his knuckles, his hand a curl. If he were only one inch more to his right, he would be visible to the audience, the profile of his nose passing from backstage to onstage. But they don’t know he is there; he is visible only to us, onstage with us.

Not only does everyone notice his quiet appearance, but every muscle in every body onstage receives a mad rush of adrenaline as we stand in our places. The only one we care about is here now. As young girls, we are all scared of him—he has the love we want, the only love we want—and yet, really, I see now, we are him in our every move. He is ready for the show.

As the second phrase of Tschaikovsky’s violins repeats, the heavy gold curtain lifts swiftly upward and a cool breeze blows across the stage as the cavernous space of the audience enters our private world. Squeeze harder; pull up. Don’t breathe. This is not a moment to be mortal. I am a Balanchine dancer.

The two great men of my life—George Balanchine and Lincoln Kirstein—are dead. While I have a certain detachment from New York City Ballet now—it is a very different company from the one I danced with and over a hundred other companies around the world now dance Balanchine’s ballets—I remain incapable of neutrality toward Serenade, or the man who made it. I see Lincoln up there now in his black, double- breasted Savile Row suit, hovering with his eagle’s gaze on my flagrant, unchecked subjectivity.

As for Mr. B, what would he think of my reflections on his first American ballet? I imagine him saying “Too fancy!” as he did when one critic deciphered one of his ballets. “Why do Americans,” he asked, “always have to see meaning in everything?” I am one of the dancers Balanchine chose for the New York City Ballet between its official founding in 1948 and his death in 1983—we stand at fewer than five hundred in all, many already gone, others going each year, a few hundred still here, reduced; we are a dying breed. By the turn of the 21st century, while his ballets thrived around the world, no dancer he chose remained on a stage still performing.

A finite few now, we are his druids, he the father of us all. I was one of the very last he chose when he was old and legendary, and I was seventeen. I lived in his world from age 10 to age 26—17 years. But once you’ve lived there, you never leave.

Photos: Both Serenade pictures by Paul Kolnik; Balanchine by Rowntree/Getty Images; Kirstein by Martha Swope.

[elonscult]

The Awakening - Chapter 7

Chapter 7

“You like this?” Elon asked squinting his eyes and pointing at the colossal piece of metal standing just a few feet away from them. The 120-meter-tall rocket was definitely a sight to behold. Elon lowered his hand to look at Sabrina, her face in complete awe looking at his creation.

“It’s alright.” She said sarcastically grinning. “Can I get one?”

“You want a rocket? What would you do with it?” Elon smiled, the long black coat he was wearing moving along with the wind.

“Go around.” Sabrina said.

“This one is yours then.” He said jokingly pushing her.

“Here, I’ll show you the rest of the facility.” He said taking her hand and guiding her.

They went around for the next hour or so, Elon had to be in his office doing some work and took the opportunity to finally show Sabrina the new things he was working on, not wanting to have her stay at home away from him. He was so proud of his position at SpaceX, it was his little love-project, and there was no better feeling for him than to be close to his two adorations.

Finally, they went back to his office. Elon sat behind his desk while Sabrina sat in front of him going through something on her phone.

Alec: Are you at home?

Sabrina: No, I’m with E at his office.

A near instant response buzzed on her palm.

Alec: I’ll pick you up in 10.

Sabrina gave her phone a dirty look, she didn’t exactly want to explain the last couple of days to her friend. She knew what he’d say.

“Everything okay, Sab?” Elon asked, taking his eyes off his computer for a moment.

“Yeah.” She smiled. “I have this thing with Alec… I also have to go to my office later.”

“You’re always slipping away.” Elon’s lips now forming a subtle smile.  

“Well, I like to keep it mysterious.” Sabrina said. “You want to join us for lunch?”

“I can’t, sweetheart. I’m way behind on some stuff here.” He ran a hand through his hair, visibly annoyed.  

“I know, I know. I’ll see you later then” she pressed her palms on the desk to lean forward and kiss him.

He cupped her face with his hands, taking her sweet taste in.

“I’ll miss you.” He whispered, still close to her.

“I’ll make it up to you.” She smiled, thinking of a good couple of ways to make it up to him, possibly in his bedroom.

Sabrina walked out of the building, her sneakers making little noises as she stepped through the polished floors, jeans and a leather black jacket covering her from the cold breeze. She smiled as soon as she saw Alec’s sport car waiting for her in the parking lot.

“Hey.” Sabrina said hopping in the car.

“Why are you acting all jolly?” He asked half smiling. A white button-up shirt scrunched up showing the tattoos that decorated his arms, a small heart with an S on his forearm.

“I’m always jolly, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Sabrina said, buckling her seatbelt and then looking at his friend.

Alec and Sabrina were both standing in front of the elevator waiting for the doors to open. The entrance of the building Alec lived positioned behind them, marble white floor decorating the lounge and desk area, expensive chandeliers falling from the high ceilings.

When the doors opened, they stepped aside to let a couple of people walk off and then Sabrina walked in followed by her blonde-haired friend.

She quickly pressed the PH button urging Alec to slide his key-card through the sensor.

“Where’s your key?” He asked putting away his.

“I left it at home.” She responded continuously pressing the button to close the door.

“Stop.” Alec laughed. “It’s already pressed.” He placed his hands on her waist pushing her aside.

Sabrina smiled trying to regain her balance as the elevator doors closed.  They opened again to expose Alec’s multi-million-dollar penthouse. A place Sabrina was too familiar with, she felt at home here. Everything was neatly ordered, from the fuzzy blankets on the living room to the white flowers placed on the kitchen counter. The smell of Italian food quickly flooding Sabrina’s senses. She hopped on the kitchen counter and grabbed a slice of pizza. Alec leaned on the counter in front of her, crossing his arms and looking at her.

“You’re annoying.” He finally said.

“Why?” She asked, still eating. “Are you still angry?”

“You totally ditched me for your stupid boyfriend.” Alec said.

“I thought you wanted us together in the first place.” She smiled. “And I didn’t ditch you, Alec.”

“You hurt my feelings, I’m such a good friend you know, you don’t appreciate me.” A sharp tone coming from him, now leaning to grab some Pizza.

“I totally do.” She said lightly kicking him. She frowned remembering the night of the assault.

“Hey.” Alec said, reaching out to Sabrina. “I just worry so much about you, are you doing alright?”

“I don’t know.” She unknowingly said. “I don’t wanna talk about it.”

Alec shoot one last worried look to his friend before giving up the subject. The remaining of the meal they spent catching up and talking nonsense with each other, both comforted by the security they gave one another.  A high voice coming from the hallway interrupted their conversation.

“Sabrina!” A short blonde-haired woman approached them almost running, wearing only a long T-Shirt -that Sabrina assumed Alec’s- and some underwear.

Sabrina raised an eyebrow at Alec. He shrugged.

“Hey, Natalie.” Sabrina said making her words last longer, smiling at the girl. “I didn’t know you were here.”

“Oh, I’m so happy to see you.” Natalie jumped to put her arms around Sabrina’s neck wrapping her in an uncomfortable hug. “Honey, I’m so sorry about what happened.” Natalie said. “The world is really crazy.” She continued, pouting.

“Yeah.” Sabrina forcingly said. Alec’s girlfriend often got on her nerves. She was as obnoxious as she looked, Sabrina often wondered what Alec had seen in her, other than the fact that she was beautiful- there was nothing too interesting about her.

Alec scoffed.

“Baby I didn’t know you were going to be home for lunch, I would’ve cooked something.” She said placing her arms now around Alec’s neck. The tall guy not moving an inch.

“I didn’t know you were still here.” He sincerely said.

“Well, of course, silly.” Natalie said, now kissing him. Sabrina rolled her eyes.

Alec smiled enjoying the feeling of annoying his best friend.

“I also heard that you’re back with Elon.” Natalie finally separated from Alec. “We should go out to dinner, the four of us.” She smiled. Her green eyes shining.

“Don’t encourage her.” Alec said. “I don’t want them together.”

“Yes!” Sabrina bolted, suddenly interested in the conversation. “What a great idea, would love that.”

“Honey, be happy for your friend.” Natalie said, scolding her boyfriend.

“Yes, Alec. Be happy for me.” Sabrina smiled teasing him. He shook his head.

Natalie finally let go of Alec to go grab a plate to eat. He took advantage of her being away to talk to his friend.

“So, are you moving in with him?” Alec asked.

“No.” Sabrina said. “I just don’t wanna be home right now.” Understandably.

“I don’t know what we’re doing or where we stand.” She continued.

“You never know with him! That’s what I’m telling you.” Alec said gesturing with his hands.

“I know. But we’re trying. He’s done with his ex-wife.” Sabrina said.

“I sure hope so.” he said. “Listen, why don’t you stay here instead, you don’t have to be at his house.”

“I will be back at my place, or here. If that makes you feel better” she smiled.

“It does.” he grinned.

After the encounter with Alec, Sabrina made her way to her office where she spent more than half of the day catching up with the work that she hadn’t done the days before. Somehow, keeping her mind focused on work made her feel a little bit more like herself, being at work and being with Elon took her back to months ago where the two of them had been together for the first time, before it all got ruined. She shrugged those thoughts out of her head.

When the clock struck 6, she texted Elon to remind him about dinner at her parent’s place. She bit her lip in anticipation unsure of how the evening would go.

At exactly 7pm Sabrina arrived at her parent’s house, stepping out of the cab she took a deep breath before entering.

She found her mother in the kitchen, preparing dinner. Her brown hair perfectly blew out giving it lots of volume matching the dramatic vibes from her makeup. The tall-ish woman catching a glimpse of her daughter before hugging her.

“My love.” She said.

“Hi, mom.” Sabrina hugged her back.  

“Look at you, all pretty.” Her mom muttered, her brown eyes brightly placed on Sabrina.

“You too.” Sabrina said.

“Dad is in the living room.”

45 minutes later, Sabrina’s three-person family was sitting in the living room together, making small talk while they waited for her estranged boyfriend to arrive.

“Well, is he gonna grace us with his presence?” Her dad finally asked, watching as Sabrina texted him again.

“Of course, dad.” Sabrina annoyingly said. “We can eat, I’m sure he’ll be here soon.”

Sabrina felt a vortex of emotions forming inside of her as they all ate dinner. All except Elon. She tried to appease her father as long as she could while her mother tried to ease the tension between them, as she always would do. Her mind couldn’t come up with a single reason of why Elon wouldn’t be there or wouldn’t be texting her or calling her. She really hoped there was a reason.

20 minutes later the sound of a car’s door closing followed by a loud sound of something breaking startled Sabrina. Then, the door bell rang.

“I’ll get it.” Sabrina stood up hurrying through the foyer to reach the door. She opened it to find a -highly- intoxicated Elon barely standing in front of it.

“Baby.” He said smiling. “I’m here.” He motioned with his hands. He sloppily slammed his lips on Sabrina’s where she could taste the strong taste of whiskey. She moved away.

“Are you serious right now?” She asked. “What the hell?”

“Shh” he shushed her, ignoring her and walking into the house. “What a beautiful house, do I get a tour?”

“Stop, for real.” Sabrina hurried behind him trying to stop him from falling.

“No, baby. I’m here to meet your parents.” He walked through the entrance to the dinning room where Sabrina’s parents where sitting.

As he entered, Sabrina’s dad shoot an angry look at his daughter, her mom still smiling squeezing her husband’s arm.

“Oh, how nice to finally meet you.” Sabrina’s mom stood up. “I’m Rachel, you’ve met Richard.” She smiled.  

Elon gave her a wide smile promptly hugging her.

“Likewise, I see where Sabrina got her beauty.” He spoke. Sabrina waiting behind him, not sure of what was going on.

“Elon.” Richard said. Sabrina frowned trying to decipher the tone of her dad’s voice.  

“Sir, good to see you in this environment.” Elon jokingly spoke. “I brought you a bottle of whiskey but I’m afraid I lost it on the way.”

“Oh god.” Sabrina whispered.

“Sit, please.” Rachel laughed sitting down again, followed by her husband. “Sabrina, come sit.” She urged her daughter, trying to lighten the situation.

“I think we’ll just go, mom.” Sabrina started to say.

“Sit.” Richard spoke, clearly displeased.

“Yes, baby, I just got here.” Elon said, sitting down.

Sabrina sat down next to Elon, the dim light coming from the spots above them shone through her face, not letting any emotion go unnoticed.

“We just finished eating but I can heat you up a plate.” Rachel said.

“No, mom it’s okay.” Sabrina answered for him. Elon looked at her confused.

“I’ll bring you a piece of pie. You like pie, don’t you? Of course you must like pie.” Rachel hurried to the kitchen while Sabrina buried her face into her hands.  

“Honey, cheer up.” Elon drunkenly said, rubbing Sabrina’s back. She scoffed, looking up.

“How’s work going? I-I saw you won an award on TV.” Elon continued, now talking to Richard, his hand still on Sabrina’s back.

“I did, work’s going well. I saw you got sued on TV.” Richard said.

“Richard, don’t be rude.” Rachel said placing a perfect plate in front of Elon, then, sitting down.

“Well, it’s true. Isn’t it?”  

“Yeah, uh- It’s complicated” Elon began.

“You’re also married.” Richard continued.

“Divorcing.” Elon said, visibly uncomfortable.

“Dad stop.” Sabrina said.

“I’m just getting to know him, what’s the big deal?” He said brushing it off. “You’ve got quite a reputation. Not a good one.”

“I understand.” Elon nodded.

Sabrina moved in her seat while Elon began eating. Rachel still smiling, not breaking her perfect trophy-wife appearance even for a second.

“This pie is so good.” Elon said.

“Thank you, I made it myself.” Rachel said. “Sabrina makes a good pie too, you know. She’s a great cook.”

Elon took a moment to smile at Sabrina. He thought she looked so beautiful with that concerned look on her face.  

“Of course. She is good at absolutely everything.” He said.

Sabrina laughed looking at his drunken boyfriend. Her father cleared his throat, uncomfortable.

“I would like to know what your intentions with my daughter are. Other than disturbing her life, seemingly.” Richard said.

“Not disturbing her life.” Elon said. “I’m in love with your daughter.” He grabbed Sabrina’s hand.

Sabrina smiled and gave her father a cautious look.

“Right.” Richard said.

Rachel leaned into her husband’s arm. “We appreciate that you take care of her.” She looked at Richard, he rolled his eyes and raised his hands not wanting to elaborate on the subject.

“He does take care of me. And he brings so much value into my life, dad. Believe it or not.” Sabrina said.

Elon nodded.

“You need to relax. Let your daughter live a little.” Elon let out, his tone not firm at all- influenced by the substances going through him-. Sabrina’s eyes widened.

Richard shoot a look at his daughter, not having to say a word.

“Okay, I think we’ll better leave this for another time.” Sabrina said standing up. Elon looked up at her, muddled.

“It was very nice meeting you, Elon.” Rachel hurried. “Hopefully, we can repeat this at a better time.”

“My pleasure, anytime, I’ll be here.” Elon said.

They awkwardly said their goodbyes and Sabrina helped Elon balance himself while they walked towards the outside of the house, there, she found his car parked in a completely chaotic way. She secured his seatbelt while he complained about it and then slammed the passenger door.

“Don’t slam the door.” Elon complained as she hopped on the driver’s seat.

“You are fucking unbelievable.” She muttered.

He frowned.

“What’s with the attitude? I thought it went well.” Elon said.

“You knew how important this was for me. And you got here almost 2 hours late, drunk and now my dad probably hates you.” Sabrina said starting the car and driving off to Elon’s house. “And you drove here drunk.”

“It was on autopilot.” He defended himself. “Kinda.”

Sabrina shook her head, disappointed. Her palms pressing the car wheel.

“Baby, I’m sorry.” Elon pleaded, suddenly feeling miserable. He grabbed Sabrina’s forearm queuing her to look at him. But she wouldn’t. He sat back and closed his eyes while he felt the world around him spin away. The soft movement of the car revolving his stomach. He sighed.

Elon opened his eyes again as Sabrina was opening the door to help him get down of the car. He leaned on her to walk to his bedroom, her small figure steadily holding him. When they finally reached the bed, he let himself fall into it, his legs hanging from the edge. Sabrina cautiously took his shoes off and hopped on top of him to unbutton his shirt.

“Am I getting lucky tonight? I thought you were angry?” Elon grinned, his vision blurry.

Sabrina shook her head. He moved causing her to fall on top of him completely and then he surrounded her with his arms.

“My girl. So pretty.” He sloppily kissed her.

“Stop.” Sabrina laughed pushing him away. “You’re incorrigible.” She finished taking his clothes off and walked into the bathroom to change herself, when she went back, she found a peaceful Elon -now- sleeping. Sabrina limited herself to climb next to him and sleep it off. 

-----------------------------------

I will try to upload once a week at least, I literally have only one working brain cell. thank you thank you

[flying-elliska]

Shadow and Bone Season 1 Review

Ok so I got distracted by a need to watch all of Ben Barnes' filmography (lmao) but here is my review : It was really fun to watch and it was clearly made with love which is already the main thing with YA fantasy, which is often turned into a soulless moneygrab when put on screen. The actors were GREAT. I did think that the Crows suffered from being mashed up with the Shadow and Bone story, but they were still a highlight. I also think it was a bit rushed, esp. when it came to Alina's training. The costumes were beautiful, I want a kefta now. Plus the crossover fanfic interactions btw the SaB characters and the Crows were just pure joy. Also Milo, obviously <3 I'm in hyperfixation mode so here, have an essay :

The "Shadow and Bone" Characters :

- Jessie Mei Li !!!!!! She really made me like Alina so much more than in the books, she absolutely is the 'human embodiment of literal sunshine' and she was a joy to watch. Her character's arc is cliché but her acting is so expressive and endearing, I really felt for her all the way through. (maybe I'm biased bc Jessie talking about her ADHD and seeing her thrive at the same time is like!!! i love them they deserve all the best.) I like that they made Alina more proactive - even though she does make some stupid decisions... but I just don't understand people who put that down as bad writing, like ??? have you ever met a real person who only makes wise, good decisions ?? a character like that would either be at the end of their story or just in the background because that makes them static. The things with the maps in the beginning does a good job of illustrating how she is just this one girl making rash, erratic decisions out of fear and loyalty and doesn't have a sense of the bigger picture, caught in the tide of bigger events. It works for her character. When it comes to the choice of making her half-Shu, I do think it really makes sense re: her character feeling like an outsider but I do understand the criticisms that the microaggressions felt too relentless and one-note. I am really looking forward to them introducing Tamar and Tolya and hopefully connecting to them over her heritage in a more positive way.

- Mal in the books was one of the most annoying YA characters I've ever come across, so I really liked that they made him much more of a loyal, devoted friend. I found his relationship with Alina cute, it really gives us the sense that these are two orphans who found a home in each other, childhood best friends (and potential sweethearts) separated by war, two army grunts and ordinary people caught up in the wheels of power and war that usually crushes people like them, it's a great way to introduce the dynamics of their world and it's a trope that always makes me emo. It felt a bit too one note to me, though, and too heavily on the nose, like Mal's only personality was his attachment to Alina (and his resentment towards the Grisha) and too much of her emotional arc also relied on him. Them hitting us over the head with the meadow scenes felt like pure telling instead of showing and it ended up being super repetitive and kind of annoying. I am willing to like this pairing, but I wanted more scenes of them just having conversations about things and really understanding why they like each other beyond the whole childhood friends bond that we're asked to accept exists at the beginning. So I hope there's more depth there in next seasons.

- Ben Barnes!!!! Just jksdfhgkdjghdf. I'm not a big villain stan usually and I hated the Darkling in the books but DAMN his performance is just amazing. They managed to make him more sympathetic and human while at the same time making clear the stuff he does is deeply horrible. There's the Magneto-aspect of 'well clearly his methods are fucked up but he's addressing a terrible injustice nobody is doing anything about' that makes it very tempting to root for him ; and again, well, like, Ben Barnes is so hot and charismatic it feels uncomfortable (which I guess is part of the point lol). His loss of humanity is, up to a point, understandable, brought about by despair, loneliness, grief and a sense of powerlessness - living so long he starts to see other people as disposable, losing so many people he stops caring, seeing over and over how hate never seems to stop, etc. It's a logical explanation for going insane.

But the hunger for power is also very much present as a motivation and this ambiguity is there constantly. Does he maybe come to genuinely care for Alina or is it totally bullshit ? I think he does, he's just so fucked up that it comes out as possessiveness and a need to control her. He wants Alina to be his equal but he's incapable of treating her that way. It's tragic, in a sense, but the show doesn't excuse his actions either. Like his monstrosity is a product of this world full of injustice, yes, and that warrants some compassion, monsters are always a symptom of their environment in some ways and dehumanizing them completely is an excuse ; but at the same time, he sabotaged his own cause anyway the moment he started to treat other people like things, as he does with Alina, because that just perpetuates the cycle of violence and hate. At some point he started feeling like he was the only solution and he was owed power for his sacrifices, and he's using his cause as an excuse. When Alina came to him, there was a possibility for redemption, taking down the Fold, and it's a test because there is finally someone on his level of power. But instead of seeking to remedy the power imbalance between them, he made it worse, by lying to her, manipulating her, etc, and the antler collar is the ultimate sign of this.

I love those scenes towards the end (the antler-based body horror has big Hannibal vibes, so messed up). I like Alina telling him they could have had this, that she had compassion for him and his cause, that they could have worked together, and he's the one responsible for screwing it up and this time his claim that he's the misunderstood victim ("Make me your villain") appears delusional and self-serving instead of somewhat justified. The almost-lovers to enemies vibes, the sense of lost potential, and the angst of the whole 'oh you could finally have been loved by people, too bad you fucked it up !', very juicy. There is this fundamental idea that power/respect/love is not something you are owed no matter how good your intentions are or because you're strong or you have suffered or you're willing to commit horrible drastic actions, you have to keep proving you deserve it, and trying to claim power without responsibility of care turns you into a monster. The thing with the stag was an excellent metaphor of the fact that there's things you can't take, they have to be given to you, and the wonderful power there is in understanding that is what allows Alina to harness the stag amplifier's power. This is really when she escapes his grim utilitarian outlook and a different way forward and owns her own power fully on her own terms.

Anyway I hope Alina gets to beat the shit out of him at some point that would be very sexy but I'm also looking forward to see how their arcs parallel and diverge from each other as Alina starts to grapple more with the implications of her power and the harsh dilemmas of war and her own dark side. I want to see him become scared of her, and I feel it will be more visible than in the books where he just has this cold aggressive facade all the time. This one feels a lot more openly emotional which is just a lot more interesting.

- As for the other characters ; Zoya mostly made me sad. The actress has the perfect vibes but I'm not sure I love their take on her character so far, it does make sense in terms of the later books - that she has internalized prejudice regarding her mixed-race heritage, that she is jealous of Alina because of how hard she's fought to get where she is and Alina kind of takes it away from her, etc. But I would have liked to see a bit more of her being badass and sharp-tongued in a clever (even if mean) way instead of spending most of her time being rejected by men and being racist towards Alina. I did like the ending though, of her actually seeing the monstrosity of the Darkling in action and the mention of her aunt. And her brief bonding with Inej was great, just because it was badass but also maybe because it could be a part of Zoya learning to accept her Suli heritage in turn, maybe not right away but in time, when thinking of that part of herself, she won't only think of her parents' ruined marriage and all the pain it caused, but also of that badass and brave acrobat girl who went toe to toe with these really scary monsters without even having any powers and !!!!!

- Also Leigh's cameo was so cute and as an aspiring writer this is just such wish fulfillment

- I honestly think that having the Crows there actually made the S&B story better ? Not only in terms of the much needed levity breaks but also in terms of themes. For instance, Matthias and Nina's story gave us a really raw and visceral view of how the Grisha are hunted. And Inej's relationship to Alina really gave us a sense of what Alina actually means to people who believe in the Saints in a way that doesn't feel just like 'ugh those superstitious people' because we know that Inej's faith is part of what makes her who she is and a person with morals, and something that saw her through the worst moments of her life. It feels so special that she got to meet Alina and given a sign that maybe the world is not completely shitty. And Alina's kindness towards Inej really gives you a sense that she might be, or become worthy of that belief in time, or at least that she wants to, that she's figuring out her power to really touch people's lives might be a good thing, and that she's starting to accept this responsibility more fully. And her arming Inej is a nice parallel to that. I'm very emotional about this scene, because one of the first things we see of young Alina is her taking out a knife to defend Mal from the bullies, because she's protective and brave, but she's also aware the world is a shitty place, and so her giving that knife to Inej is a sort of spiritual transmission and recognition of sorts, that she trusts Inej with that fighting power, that she'll use this knife to defend herself and her loved ones and not abuse it. It's so interesting. And a counter point to the Darkling's fucked up relationship to power that Alina might at some point get afraid she'll replicate. That you could see Alina trying to gather followers and using people's admiration for her like he did but instead she sets them free and empowers them. It's great. And I feel that when Inej takes to the seas, she'll think about Alina. (I do hope somebody tells her Alina's not dead at some point though god). Girls giving each other knives is my spirituality, honestly.

- And I also noticed an interesting parallel between Kaz and the Darkling in terms of being two emo dudes who like to wear black, are prone to violence and have a thing for two very powerful women they think are special and want to have at their side, but of course, they go about it in very different ways. The Darkling comes at it from a place of power while Kaz comes from a place of utter powerlessness, first of all, and he understands why it's important to set Inej free. Him spending the entire season trying to earn enough money to pay off Inej's indenture is the opposite to the Darkling putting that collar on Alina and while I do have issues with how the show portrays him, I do love that. Love is about setting the person you love free !!!! And that confrontation scene was so powerful, when Kaz tells the Darkling Alina was tired of being a captive ! Drag him !

- As for Genya, I liked the actress and her chemistry with Alina, but I'm not sure they did a great job of making her arc very clear, for instance what it means for her to get that red kefta, her relationship with the other Grisha, etc. Her and David are already very cute though. Also very much looking forward to see where that goes.

So yeah I think they did a great job with this bit actually, I enjoyed a lot more than I think I would and even though it is a very tropey story, there's plenty of depth there too.

The Crows :

- I'm a bit more nitpicky about this because I care about these characters so much. I think overall the problem is that the SaB story in the books happens on this massive scale with enormous stakes, and that next to that the Crows' issues feel less important ; it's like their impact is distorted by the gravity of the much larger story. Like for instance, Kaz in the books is very much at the center of everything, this larger than life trickster figure who knows and controls almost everything by sheer cleverness, and he has this sense of allure and mystique that can't happen here, and so his aura just shrinks. On top of that they're not on their home turf. Being introduced to these characters before they've reached their full levels of badass is weird - there is a reason why prequels generally happen after the main stuff, because they count on the love you have for these characters at their full potential to make you interested in their story when they were less badass and interesting. So I had several moments where I was like 'oh this feels wrong'. Tbh the idea that they would even volunteer to kidnap Alina in the first place, what with Inej's backstory, feels kind of wrong, esp since they had no idea of what would happen to her if they succeeded.

- But I still enjoyed a lot of it though, especially the fact that they were this force of chaos in the midst of this bigger narrative that's a lot more self-serious. The bits with the train, or the circus acts were very clever. A lot of the best moments in the show happen when they come to disturb the other plot in unexpected ways. I'm still dead over the whole 'Alina jumps into their carriage' scene, that was fucking gold. The team up at the end !!!! Alina and Kaz making a deal ! Inej stabbing the Darkling !!!! Them stealing the Darkling's carriage !!! They don't give a shit that the story is supposed to be super dramatic it's great.

- Jesper is the one character they completely nailed from start to finish and he's probably my favorite part of the whole show. He's very funny without being reduced to the role of comic relief ; he's just so! damn! cool!!!!!!! I honestly feel this is a thing they actually did even better than in the books, or at least Six of Crows where I felt Jasper kind of disappeared behind Kaz and they insist a lot on his flaws and issues. So before we dig more into those problems I love that they gave him time to be this ultra badass who saves the day several times ; while at the same time, hinting at further developments like his powers or his gambling issues. Kit Young is just perfect, confident without being arrogant, a bit cold when it comes to crime while at the same time being so obviously caring with Inej - I loved their friendship, that was so sweet. My main criticism is that they should have made it clearer he was bi because there are already people calling him gay and that's very annoying. I know some people had a problem with his hookup and like...I can see it's a bit of a cliché...the charming badass bisexual adventurer....it's a trope I kind of love though lmao and the scene itself felt kind of cute and fun. He's not the only person who is shown to have an active sexuality and he's also not the only queer person around and we know he's going to have a more substantial romantic arc later so eh. On a larger note I loved the little casual hints of completely normalized queerness - Nadia thirsting over Zoya, Fedyor and Ivan, Poppy, etc. Having grown up with fantasy where queerness was either completely erased or very tormented and problematic, this was refreshing as hell.

- Inej and Kaz...my faves... They have a kind of relationship which feels so rare and unique in terms of what exists on TV and while I don't feel they entirely replicated it, the core is still there - the mutual respect and building of trust, the longing, the repression, the trauma, etc. One thing I really like is their arc around faith - in the books, Kaz is dismissive of Inej's faith in ways that often feel really shitty and I like that he learns to be more respectful of it. It's very much linked to hope/survival ; Inej keeps this token from her parents and she hopes to find them again ; Kaz tells her it's no use and she'll survive better if she gives up. He believes Alina is a fake, while Inej wants to believe that myths can come true and there is hope for good things in the world. Kaz comes to accept that Alina is the real deal and, out of respect for Inej's faith, to stop pursuing her. I loved the bit about Inej struggling to kill as well - it's the dilemma of what her survival and that of the people she really cares about are worth in such a shitty world - her compassion is a good part of her but so is her survival instinct, and that's the part Kaz represents - that even after she's been through hell, broken in unfathomable ways, even if she gave up all hope and faith in the world, even she becomes dangerous and ruthless to survive, she will still deserve dignity, and to be treated better. And meanwhile she is willing to break her principles, which she holds so dearly, to save him, when he's never had anyone who cared for him like that - enough to keep him alive. That bit in the church !!!!! God !!!!!! Bye !!!!!!! And then him basically calling her his own version of a Saint, that he doesn't believe in miracles but he does believe in her !!! It's very emblematic of their whole arc ; he empowers her to survive in a ruthless world and loves her at her most dangerous ; but he loves her laugh too, he finds her a ship and her parents, he honors her capacity for love and hope even when he can't share it. And she sees that he's capable of doing better, that he's worth caring for. This whole thing kills me honestly and I can't wait to see where they take this next. I'm not mad they're a bit more soft and obvious than in the books, Kaz would just have come across as an an asshole otherwise.

- That said, there are bits of how they introduced their backstories I don't like. I get that making it so Inej was still tied to the Menagerie gave them a very powerful reason to want to kidnap Alina beyond greed so that they wouldn't look like very shitty people. But in the books Inej is terrified by the idea of simply seeing Heleen or the Menagerie and the way they have her interact with her feels weirdly casual and dismissive of her trauma. Also, in the books, the fact that Kaz had to convince Per Haskell to buy Inej's contract through a lot of effort, that he wasn't the one holding that above her head either, made the power dynamics more palatable. I especially disliked the scene where Kaz says he won't free other girls because just Inej is special, it makes him look like he has the power but he's just too much of a callous asshole to do it, and that he just freed Inej because he liked her which is absolutely not what their relationship is about at the start, it's a lot more about seeing Inej's dangerous side behind a facade of powerlessness and relating to her, in a sense, and this scene made it all feel cheap.

- Also, what was that about Inej having a brother ? Not a fan of that either. I'm afraid they're going to make her story all about finding what happened to him, and that's 1) too on the nose similar to Kaz's story and 2) it kind of cheapens her own arc, a female character realizing that what was done to her was wrong, reclaiming her own power and dignity and then making sure it doesn't happen to anybody else, harnessing her personal experience to save strangers, that's so powerful - making it about a family member at first, especially if it's about revenge, it's so much more simplistic and unoriginal and the perspective really annoys me.

- Also not a fan of Per Haskell not being there because he's a very important part of Kaz's evolution, so I hope he shows up eventually - and the way they introduced Pekka Rollins was kind of like...weird and out of place. I just found the Crows' introduction scenes stilted and not as cool as they should have been - well, Jesper and Inej were very cool, but we needed to see Kaz in action first, we needed to see why he's such a menace before we see him flounder later, and I just...I don't know exactly but it didn't work for me. Also this is a very petty thing but I wasn't crazy about the Ketterdam sets, I know this is probably a budget thing but in my head it looked like this incredible mix of Amsterdam and Venice - specific locations in the book directly remind me of parts of Amsterdam I know very well - and instead what we got felt like this very generic London-ish fantasy setting....so boring. Also a lot of scenes that felt to exposition-y. I don't mind that Kaz was a bit softer than in the books, like many people have said some things work in books and don't work on a screen, and you need to make the character's inner dynamics more explicit. But I do agree that, at the same time, he should have been more ruthless towards people outside of his group. Loved that scene where he faces the Inferni though, and how well they illustrated his disability and aversion to touch.

- I don't have that much to say about Nina and Matthias ; I'm still not super sold on the whole 'haha misogyny!' thing and I dislike that so much of Matthias' change of heart relies on the fact that he finds Nina hot. But I did think that the actors had enough chemistry to make their scenes together interesting and cute ; I loved the waffle scene. Even though it's disappointing that they didn't find an actress who was more clearly plus size for Nina, I still think Danielle does a good job bringing her bold, unapologetic energy. I'm really looking forward to seeing the Crows as a whole team.

So yeah, even though the season didn't feel like a perfect, coherent whole, it was just a lot of fun and I really hope they get renewed. In particular I feel like tying the first trilogy to the Crows' story could create such interesting parallels in terms of themes, about power, the cost of survival, hope, trauma, etc etc

[fedonciadale]

Hi! Before Netflix’s announcement of Shadow and Bone, I had never heard about the books. Many blogs on Tumblr freaked out about it, some of them have tastes similar to mine, so I watched the teaser and read something about it, and it seems really amazing! Could you tell me what to expect from the series? I don’t mind spoilers, on the contrary! I’ve already seen many controversies on the ships, lol. Is Darklina really toxic and abusive? How is the romance in general? Is the plot captivating and well-written? What about the characters? Could you give personal opinions too?

Hi there!

Before I put it under the cut, let me just say that I’m soooo hyped. I love “six of crows” and “crooked kingdom” and I think that the “Shadow and Bone” trilogy is very decently written. Even if you can see that Leigh Bardugo improved dramatically from her first series to SoC, SaB is still a very good book. I sort of love all the ships in the Grishaverse, canon and non-canon and even some that are not even a potential in the books. I’m going to have a hard time because I sort of love Darklina and yet I’m also very satisfied with what happens to Alina in canon, so the impending ship war is already freaking me out - in a bad way. lol.

SPOILER ALERT - SPOILER ALERT

So, let’s start with the SaB trilogy. As I said it is a very good book, and there are some splendid ideas: the shadowfold which you see in the trailer is a creepy and great idea.

Alina who is our PoV in SaB is an orphan (and as an aside, the cast for her is superb, superb, that’s how I pictured her) who doesn’t know that she has magic. And when her magic is discovered she is sort of thrown into this whole courtly world and is completely out of her depth. We follow her as she slowly learns to navigate the troubled waters in Ravka. Ravka is her home country and gives very Russian vibes. Ravka is in trouble because of neighbours that are at war with the country, because of the Shadowfold and because of the fact that they are one of the few countries that actually allows people to wield magic (the grisha). The highest General of Ravka is the ‘Darkling’ - according to legend it’s the sixth or seventh Darkling, a wizard who can control darkness. As the story proceeds we learn that the Darkling has been actually one and the same for several centuries and his agenda is a bit shady. He was born at a time when Grisha were not trained but persecuted and he’s deeply traumatized because of that. He is your typical relatable villain. I caught on very early on, that he is a villain, but it is very well done in the books, and Ben Barnes is the perfect cast for him. The Darkling tries to get Alina on his side, it is almost as if big parts of the book are the ‘villain speech’ - you know the speech where the villain tries to make the hero join the dark side. Lol. I think Alina’s doubts about what is right and wrong, interesting side characters with believable back stories and motivations and interesting choices make this a thoroughly enjoyable read, even if I picked up on the fact that Alina would end up with her childhood sweetheart (who takes quite some time to realize what he has in her) early on. To me, it was clear that Malec and Alina would be an item at the end, I saw it from miles away. To me it’s a bit like Romione in HP. I saw that the ship would happen but I didn’t particularly like it. But since Malina is much better done than Romione I don’t really have an issue with it. I would never read fic about them, but I think the was Leigh Bardugo reaches them as endgame is done well.

I really like Alina, but what really got me hooked are the side characters. Obviously the Darkling is very interesting - he’ll always be a villain, but boy what a villain!

Then there is Genya and David (they make a wonderful couple) and Zoya and best of all Nikolai Lantsov, the only member of the Tsar family that really cares. I LOVE HIM! And it’s wonderful that by now he’s got his own series, so to say. He would have been my fav to end up with Alina, because they would have had an amazing potential for “friends to lovers”, but I also knew that it was not going to happen.

So, SaB is in sum a really good read. It has some flaws. I can’t really buy the fact that the only country that allows magic users in their army is the country that is beleaguered on all sides, but I tried to overlook that while reading the books.

As for the romance: I think that Darklina is a very interesting ship but there can’t be a doubt that it is problematic. It is obvious that the Darkling wants to control Alina, that he manipulates her, that he tries to disconnect her from her friends. I would never want Alina to end up with him, but I think the dynamic is written very well.

Now, on to Six of Crows! Imagine some kind of ‘Ocean’s Eleven’ but with fantasy and a really diverse cast. A magical heist. It has so many characters to like, so many plot twists and so many tearjerkers. The plot takes place in Ketterdam, some sort of Fantasy Amsterdam - it gave of early modern Netherlands vibes, trading, thriving economy, a city government, rich burgers and all that - and Fjerda where the heroes have to infiltrate an invincible ice fortress. To me Fjerda has Germany and /or Prussia vibes (from the 19th century) but set in a Norwegian landscape? The society is shaped completely by the military and their disgust for magic users which are persecuted in Fjerda (hence the very difficult heist in the capital of Fjerda). What I like is that not all people from Fjerda are villains and let’s be honest ‘heartrenders’, the Grisha who can kill you in the blink of an eye, are sort of frightening. Now the plot of SoC revolves around a drug that would allow to control the Grisha, because it makes you dependent after one usage and which also boosts the magical power. You can imagine that everybody wants to get hold of that drug. So, the six infiltrate the ‘Ice court’ to get the formula.

The main cast are six teenagers who really had it rough. Kaz is out for revenge, has a limp and a cool cane and has a problem with being touched, although he would love nothing more than overcome that to be touched by Inej, the wraith, who owes him, because he saved her from a ‘house of dubious reputation’, and who is simply the best at stealth. Then there is Jesper, the sharp shooter, the gambler, who has more than one trick up his sleeve, there is Wylan, the son of a rich merchant who has severe daddy issues, there is Nina, who is from Ravka, a grisha with frightening abilities and a love for food, clearly pansexual, and then there is Matthias, the Fjerdan gone rogue, the prudish, strict, desperately in love with Nina blond brooding guy. Nina and Matthias are superb enemies to lovers. Kaz and Inej are the sort of “I wish they would kiss already” kind of couple - although you know that kissing is not what Kaz does and then there are Jesper and Wylan, the boys who find each other after many many miscommunications. So, the cast of SoC is diverse, in regard to skin colour (and the countries they are from) and in regard to sexuality and it doesn’t feel forced or fake-woke, not at all. Jesper’s line “No, not only girls” really has the quality of being bi iconic.

The second book in the series takes place in Ketterdam and the crew has to do another heist to prevent that the drug and the formula and the boy Kuawei who was caught up in the whole mess get into the wrong hands.

As is a must for heists, there are several surprises along the way and I am not going to spoil the worst of the plot twists. There will be tears if you have any heart at all.

So, to sum up. Definitely worth a read. Highly recommended. What are you waiting for!

[gojonanami]

Hi Sab,

I wanted to take a moment to express my heartfelt admiration for chapter four of The Ethics of Relationships. I must say, I was completely enthralled by it.

Your writing style is nothing short of remarkable. The way you effortlessly blend wit, charm, and cleverness in your dialogue is so incredibly impressive. I love it! It's so, so, so cool!!!

There were several moments in this chapter that stood out to me. The opening scene, with its softness and intimacy, immediately drew me into the world you've created. It was just so soft, and affectionate, and loving, and domestic, and I absolutely loved that! <3 (I also felt like it was a nod to previous chapters too, no?)

And the departure scene, too, where Professor Geto embarks on his journey to Kyoto... I was just so moved by emotions here... Like not wanting to cry not to make the other person cry... and so all those pent-up emotions building up... it's so, so sad... and just this departure... even though they want to say that nothing will change, while things are obviously changing, and wanting to stay in this moment of togetherness... and just the moment of taking the journey also marking the journey, or the transition in their relationship... it's just so, so, so good and so moving...

I also liked how you portrayed the state of limbo just before the term started... I just liked how you conveyed this sense of uncertainty and fear, and the idea of how your mind is running with thoughts and as a way of preoccupying yourself rather than thinking about potential what-could-be, perhaps as a way of procrastinating, embarking on the journey of joining the student council... and honestly? I thought that this was a compelling way of extending and inundating the narrative, and I thought that Yuta was actually very likeable!!

I just really appreciate the way in which you depicted the long-distance relationship. I thought it was incredibly realistic! The inclusion of video calls and the integration of those video calls into their everyday lives just made it so much more... realistic.

The scene where Professor Geto arrives late for her birthday, and the subsequent snowball effect leading to their breakup, was really moving. I just... I loved how he wanted to hastily get to her birthday, and how he had the right intentions, but life just got into the way, and how she was upset, and coincidentally Yuta came (low-key shooting his shot, eh?) and then how he comes in the end, and how the moment is sort of dampened by the concern of Yuta having potentially seen Professor Geto...

And just the whole idea of Professor Geto breaking up with her and it coming to him as a dream... not only is this a really cool nod to previous chapters, but it also is such a good way of showing that this was such a lingering concern it started to seep into his psyche and affect his unconsciousness.

I also loved the ending scene... of him just watching her, from a distance, watching her interact with Yuta, seeing what she couldn't see, seeing Yuta's expression... just... fantastic.

Sab, I want to commend you on your exceptional storytelling abilities. Your talent for crafting engaging plot lines and breathing life into your characters is truly amazing. I eagerly await the next instalment of your series, eager to see where your imagination will take us next.

I loved it!!! Thank you for writing it!!!!! <33333

I love you so much — this was so so kind 💕🥹 the fact you said you were enthralled by part four makes me want to cry 😭🥹 I’m so glad you enjoy my writing style — I never thought of myself as clever or witty but I’m so glad so many of you think I am — it’s a wonderful compliment 😭💕

yes the opening scene was definitely nods to previous chapters especially the end of part 3 — I leave suguru’s name out on purpose for a couple lines just to build a little wonder about who reader is with 🫣

It makes me so happy that the whole student government thing made sense - I was trying to find a way to integrate it naturally and I was hoping it didn’t come across as forced 🥹 so I’m glad it didn’t

The dream scene kind of just came to me — originally it was just going to be him reflecting on everything but then I was like you know — let’s make a little nod to the previous chapters and all those dreams I subjected all of you to haha.

thank you so much for this - you and everyone else are so wonderful for leaving me these messages I don’t know how to convey how thankful I am for them 🥹💕 it truly means the world to me and I love you so much — thank you for being so lovely and kind 🥹💕😭

[tellywoodtrash]

immj 16.10.20 lb

blah blah what sari for aarti issues. billionaire gangster's wives, they're just like us!!!!!!

god usmein some integration with that bloody pinjara show also. pass. fwding.

meanwhile idhar bhi wardrobe issues coz ishani has no idea how to dress for a pooja. fwding.

great, using the "maryaada" waala argument to physically intimidate a woman. i fucking hate this garbage trope of taming of the shrew.

maata ko chunni kaun chadhaayega politics.

and demure wife gently beckoning husband to come to mandir. jesus this whole ass ep is out to fucking test me.

family seems on edge about her calling vansh for pooja. masla kya hai??

dadi persuades for choodi ki rasam.

i just finished twisted 2 and this dude is soooooo much better in it. he's allowed to move his face and show emotion, allowed to talk in his natural voice, and it makes suchhhhh a marked difference.

is this even a real rasam, or one of those made-up-for-tellywood type of rasams?

anyway, heavy bedroom eyes he's giving her in front of maata rani. the rasam's already working!!!!

“laal rang suhaag ki nishaani hai. tumhe pata hai dhoke ki kya nishaani hai? khoon. laal khoon.”

aaaaaaaaaaand he ruined the moment.

debating on whether achcha shagun ya apshagun and oh my god i just don't care why can't y'all rein in your psychopath boy so that he didn't break the goddamn choodi in the first place?!?!?!

more cryptic statements. man, you know what, you're really harshing my navaratri buzz. stay the fuck away if you're gonna be like this for all the 9 days.

kaaaand saare karo khud, aur solution poocho maata rani se. yeh achcha hai.

oh, there's some kadwa sach that vansh associates with navaratri. AND YOU COULDN'T TELL HER THIS BEFORE???????

blah blah maa chod ke chali gayi, he is always sad and mad and bad during these days.

doesn't omkara wear this outfit in some ep???????

ayyyyyyyyyyyyy yeh pinjara mein far left waala toh naamkaran waala ali haina??????

vansh aur SEJAL ki bhawar mein??????/ sis, sejal has nothing to do with this. this is all about your other boy toy. you need to decide which boat to put both feet in, coz aise toh......... you’re just gonna get murdered by one of them.

ainvayi ka showdown and idhar udhar ki dhamkis.

riddhima giving another moral science lesson and saying it's navaratri, andar ke buraai ka vinaash kar do, vansh ko khud sab bata do. god bohutttt pakaati hai yeh.

mummy is meeeeeeee. calling out riddhima's stupidityyyy.

vansh ki maa ki painting jalaayi thi; man wtf is even going on in this house, you ppl are all seriously starved for entertainment.

mummy's like you no doodh ki dhuli either, you're fucking him over too. man, can you really blame the guy for being this paranoid about being betrayed???? everyone in this house other than dadi and siya is a fucking snake.

lol riddhima's like wtf is going on, DOES EVERYONE KNOW!?!?!!?

“main poochne aayi thi ki hum pooja mein kya pehne; ab lagta hai kafan hi choose karna padega.”

lmaoooooooooooooooooooooooo chachiiiiiii

vansh is back to sending everyone weirdass messages again. main hoti toh isko mute kardeti. iska toh poora din yehi chalta rehta hai. who wants bs like this clogging up the phone all damn day?????

iss ghar mein toh saare hi dhokebaaz hain. iske liye yeh roz roz ka karyakram kyun???? just send out a weekly newsletter or some shit, with "Dhokebaaz Of The Week".

ofc, ghoom phir ke sab riddhima ki galti hai. i mean, i agree that she's an extraordinary pain, but kabhi khud ke girebaan mein bhi jhaanka karo kameeno. 85% manhoosiyat tumhi logon ne phailaayi hai.

mummy being a real dumbass and telling everyone all their secrets (that she shouldn’t know) and leaving them wondering how she knows. kabir isn't gonna be happy about this.

vansh playing ms. trunchbull and has called this special assembly coz “kisi ko sazaa deni hai.”

sorry, i will only accept if the sazaa is either a gigantic chocolate cake to be finished in one sitting, or he does a human hammer throw. (*crosses fingers and prays, pls be aryan, pls be aryan*)

mummy is being overconfident. which can only mean that it's her head on the chopping block.

ENOUGH WITH THE DRAMATICS, JUST ANNOUNCE IT ALREADY. OR ARE YOU WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO GIVE YOU A LITTLE ENVELOPE LIKE AT THE OSCARS??????

not at all unnerving to have someone glare at you and say all this shit.

Bitch Barbie is me. so bored outta her minddddddd with this nonsense.

lmao these fuckers happy that they got away.

mummy is like time for me to do some overacting and chadhofy on the RIDDHIMA SUXXXXX train.

but whooooooooops. vansh was talking about you, mommy dearest.

hahahahahahahahaha aryan's“heinnnnn?????” eyes is literally

oufffffffffff draaaaaaaaaaaamaaaaaaa.

i’m really having a blast just watching aryan in the bg.

all this was just about the fucking paintingggggg????? abbe yaaaaaaaaaaaar.

but i thought he hated his mom??? why's he so torn up about her aakhri nishaani??? besides doesn't he have a statue of her???? god, this man is just..... too many fucking issues.

oh, this one seems not very surprised. did she know that mummy was shady???

mummy is also like "arre yaaaaaaaar, it's just about the painting?? lol, nbd."

mummy's like i wanted to tell you the truth about burning the painting but riddhima stopped me from doing it. whut???????? that doesn't even fucking make sense. riddhima is the one who got blamed for it ultimately, why the fuck would she stop you from telling the truth?????

vansh ki akal bhi aaj ghutne mein, that this nonsense is apparently making sense to him. must be breathing all the stupidity air that riddhima exhales.

maata rani ki jhooti kasam. waah bhai waah.

itne mein hi gangster pighal gaya. laanat.

oh shit, mummy ne saari story bataa di. just left out kabir's name as her son. said that she doesn't know where her long lost kidnapped son is.

riddhima like THISSSSSSS BITCHHHHHHHHHHH

oh damn, she put it on riddhima ki she was blackmailing her about this whole secret illegitimate son. godddddddddddd who the fuckkkkk would believe such a dumbass story???

this tall, dark yellow, and dumbass, that's who.

i mean, i wanted vansh to take mummy's side over riddhima's in this particular matter, but ugh NOT LIKE THISSSSSSS.

time for ultimate test of truth: “meri aankhon mein aankhein daal kar dekho!”

i would fail this test even when being truthful af, coz eye contact makes me HELLA uncomfortable. guess i'm always gonna be called a liar.

lmao vansh just straight up closed his eyes and refused to look into hers.

oh god mummy ki overacting has been turned up to a 14.

ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

vansh giving the same look at mummy stabbing herself with a trishul that i give when my cat is making suspicious noises in the next room.

[luuuna-rambles]

SaB review: 1x01 “A Searing Burst of Light”

Or: A record of my soon-to-occur fandom induced seizure for all the world to see

Oooooh good font yo

Alina opening monologue? Okay, bit cliche, whatever

I but Racist Fucker Number One is dying in the fold

Alina’s parent’s didn’t die in the fold in the books, right? If not, that’s a good change imo

“Come out now!” “No!” Why would you give away your position, Mal?

Mal and Alina already feel like better friends than they did in the book, though maybe that’s just the actor’s chemistry

Ketterdam mention let’s go

KETTERDAM LET’S GOOOOOOO

Jesper! Doing what he do best - shooting and gambling

Kaz!

I remember the name ‘Rotty’. Can’t remember what he did, though

Kaz definitely stole the Dekappel - either that or Inej on his orders

Thought so

Inej is in the room with him, isn’t she?

Thought so

So is the Crows storyline taking place slightly after the Alina one?

INEJ!!! MY QUEEN!!!!

Inej looking out for the Menagerie girls, what a babe!

“I only invest in the one of a kind. She isn’t like you. No one is” - woah, there. Isn’t that a bit sentimental for Dirtyhands, Kaz?

Mal, what are you doing, that is not your tent

Zoya? Hell yeah. I mean, this was back when she was a pompous ass, but still...

CROWS CROWS- wait, Kaz has got the hat on. Never mind, CROWS CROWS CROWS

That cane is goddamn perfect

No idea who Pekka Rollins’s actor is, but he’s good

Aww, I like Alexei. Shame I know what happens to him

Little attention to detail I like - we’ve seen blue kefta and red kefta but no purple - fabrikators aren’t needed

Alexei’s alive! That was a surprise!

So the blond woman’s not Nina is disguise, then? That’s a shame

Kaz acting in character is great to see. You tell that mercher!

Goddamn it. I knew it was Alexei the moment they walked into the basement

Inej’s face when she hears ‘Sun Summoner’ 🥰🥰🥰

Oh, never mind. Alexei’s dead

Crows heading to Ravka, what will they doooooo

That was great. I wonder where Nina and Matthias are, though?