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starsofang · 4 months ago

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CALL OF THE SEA / PART SEVENTEEN

pirate poly!141 x f!reader tw: NSFW, MDNI, violence, degrading, mentions of death/blood, dove is called some nasty words, please heed warnings for this chapter masterlist a/n: girlbossed a little too hard and finished the chapter a day early. posting this after my 14 hour shift with nothing but hope and dreams. this chapter is a long one, i think the longest one so far, so have fun :p

When a group of unhinged pirates invade your small village, you're whisked away from your peaceful home and thrown on to a voyage out at sea. Forced to obtain a new role as their medic, you have no choice but to accept your fate as you join their forces and aid them in their treacherous travels.

Up close, Graves was even more sinister than imagined. It was as if you were living in your own nightmare come to life, with beady eyes crinkling back at you as a curled smile stretched over his face. Adorned in all black from head to toe, with the only spouts of color being the mess of dark blonde atop his head, nearly covered by the old, leather pirate hat.

His skin was deathly pale, a feat you knew to be from his reaping sins. To take a life in return for a piece of his—a soul bind.

If he weren’t such a sick man, you’d dare say he’d been handsome, if it weren’t for the look of rotting to the core. His personality did no justice, something cocky and mighty. He knew exactly how to play his game, and he played it well.

In your turmoil, you dared to wonder if all of this was indeed another nightmare. Perhaps you were still asleep, stuck in an endless loop until Soap or Gaz awoke you as they always did; but with a sharp pinch on your thigh beneath the thin covers of Price’s bedspread, the world remained at ease.

This one wouldn’t be easy to get out of.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” Graves mused, smile so wide you worried the corners would crack and bleed. You wished you could see him writhe like a helpless roach beneath your shoe. “Why the long face?”

“How—” You swallowed, fisting the sheets. “How are you here?”

Graves stood straight, glancing around the room. He pretended to ponder, holding his arms up to shrug. “I let myself in.”

Your eyes followed his every move as he slowly stepped throughout Price’s quarters, taking it in. You sat as still as a statue, completely frozen in place. The sound of his heavy boots along the wood floors rang alarm bells.

The air in the room fell icy cold, rising goosebumps on your skin. There was that frigid chill that felt as if you’d just stepped into a slaughterhouse, a hint of decay tickling your nostrils.

This was the feel of death you’d always felt, lingering behind you, watching. He’d always been there, even if only in your mind.

“Where is the Captain?” you asked, attempting to make your voice firm. Show no weakness—it was the very thing you’d been taught since your first day on the ship. You hoped Price would be proud that you remembered.

Graves’ eyebrows raised and while his smile remained, it only seemed to glimmer with excitement when the question was asked, as if you asked a dog if he wanted a bone.

“He truly has you on a leash,” he snickered, finding something amusing in all of it. “You’re like their little bitch, aren’t you?”

Your blood ran hot at the demeaning nature his words brought, but you knew better. They were for show, something to make him appear taller. If you fell for it, you’d only be digging a deeper grave for yourself.

“No,” you muttered, eyes narrowing. “I am a pirate, just as them.”

Graves barked out a laugh, one that made your ears bleed. It was meant to deplete your confidence, poisoned with arrogance.

“Is that right?” he asked with a shit-eating grin. “A pirate, are you?”

Graves stalked towards you, agonizingly slow, stopping when his knees bumped the side of the cot. He leaned down so his face was level with yours, empty eyes peering deep within your soul. His breath reeked of death and despair, nearly knocking you unconscious.

“I’d like to test that.”

His icy hand wrapped around your bicep, hauling you out of the bed. With a yelp, you stumbled to your feet, bare of their shoes. The world beneath your soles felt foreign now, ever since Soap had given you your gift and you’d never take them off unless you were falling asleep.

The grip was tight, causing your heartbeat to thump through your muscles angrily. Your skin under his hand paled from the sheer force.

Graves tugged you along as you fought to resist him, squirming and attempting to plant your feet to the floor. Without the help of your shoes compared to his unruly strength, your fight was deemed useless. He continued dragging you, so much so you could feel little splinters begin to dig into your soles and invoke dull pangs of pain.

Fear filled your body from head to toe, your heart pounding against your rib cage. A lump filled your throat, coated with anxiety. Your mind filled with millions of thoughts, smothering any confidence you previously had and replacing it with the idea of death.

Was this where all would end? Your crew was one of the most feared among the seas, a healthy bounty placed over their heads. But there would always be one person above, and that person was Graves.

Every kick, bump, resist was fruitless as Graves hauled you to the door. What lay beyond it terrified you, images of your men dead flashing before your eyes.

Coated in their own bloodbaths, bodies laid limp amongst the floors of their own homes, sprawled out as if they meant nothing. Oh, you couldn’t bear it. You’d have to go, too—you’d have nothing left.

When Graves opened the door, you weren’t sure if the sight was any better.

It was dark, the moon only a sliver in the sky, granting no room for light. A single lantern was all that was left to cast orange shadows, its fire flickering in a dance for a way out.

Your crew was lined shoulder to shoulder, on their knees in a submissive front, hands bound with thick rope behind their backs. Graves’ men, his Shadows, held the barrel of their guns to each of their heads.

Though the sight was an improvement from what you initially prepared yourself for, it was far from good. It was bordering those images, a glimpse into what could be a massacre.

The moment you were out of Price’s quarters, Graves let go of you, shoving you. You lost your balance, tumbling to your side, your head slamming into the deck. Pain blossomed under your skull and you hissed in pain.

“Dove?” you heard one of them call out. Your head spun, making it hard to figure out who it was.

A heavy blow landed on your side where you lay, and you wheezed, Graves’ boot unexpected. It kept you in place, applying pressure to guarantee you wouldn’t try to flee and fight back.

“Get the fuck off of her,” Price growled. You could recognize it, filled with a burning venom that dared to kill anyone that was in its crossfire. “This has nothin’ to do with her.”

“It’s all to do with her,” Graves spat, digging the toe of his boot into your rib cage. His previous cockiness had melted away, revealing his boiling rage. “Isn’t that right, dove?”

Graves lifted his boot, granting you a brief moment of relief before it slammed back down. It knocked the air right out of your lungs, leaving you croaking out a plea to stop.

You coiled in on yourself, curling into a ball in attempts to lessen the damage. It did nothing to stop his boot from weighing on your side. The pain felt like nothing you’d experienced before, and you were sure you felt a bone crunch.

“Dove,” Gaz called out, frantic. He tried leaning forward to get a glimpse of your face, to search for your eyes, but the barrel of the gun only pressed deeper into the back of his skull in warning. “Dove, it’s okay. Just listen to my voice, alright? I’m right here.”

Your eyes were widened with fear, chest heaving to catch the breaths that were stolen from you. You couldn’t move, frozen in place, even as Gaz called out for you with the threat of a bullet through his head.

“I don’t know what you’re plannin’, Graves,” Price snarled, “but this is between us.”

Graves laughed diabolically, throwing his head back. It only made everything much more tense.

“Isn’t she apart of you now?” Graves humored, cocking his head. His fingers drummed along the gun in its holster on his hip. “If I’m not mistaken, she’s a pirate. I believe those were your words, Price.”

The realization that Graves knew had you going cold. The closer he got, the stronger the connection became.

“What the hell is it ye want?” Soap asked through gritted teeth. His eyes were darting back and forth between your crumpled form and Graves. “S’always somethin’ with ye, aye?”

Graves eyed Soap, a glint in his gaze. There was something unfamiliar in it, as if he held a personal grudge towards the man in question.

“There is something I want,” Graves agreed, letting out a dramatic sigh. He tapped at the gun once again, staring up at the sky in thought. “I think dove here knows exactly what that is.”

Graves dug his boot once again, peering down at you as if you were scum. You couldn’t stop the small whimper from the agony drumming in your side.

“Go on, dove,” Graves taunted, grinning. “Tell them.”

“I don’t know,” you panted. You were unfocused, eyes staring at the old floor from where your head rested.

You tried recalling what it is he could want, anything at all, but nothing was becoming clear. You scavenged through the deepest parts of your brain for even a simple clue, but the blows had made you dazed.

“I swear, I’ll fuckin’ kill you—”

“You do know,” Graves repeated, cutting off the Captain. His tone grew annoyed. “Think real hard, dove.”

“I don’t know,” you cried, shoulders beginning to shake. All the built up confidence to fight back had vanished into thin air. Now, you felt like a scared little girl, begging for mercy.

Graves’ boot lifted, then returned back down. A string of curses were thrown his way from your crew, who were thrashing in the binds, unable to aid you under the lineup of guns to their heads.

You felt wetness cascade down your cheeks, dampening your skin and falling down to the side of your head from the angle you laid. It was then you realized you were crying, embarrassingly so.

Only mere hours ago you were deemed a pirate, and yet at the start of war, you fell apart like a damsel.

“The telescope,” Ghost said, voice low. It was the first he’d spoken, only sitting there silently as you were beaten down. His head hung low, as if ashamed, though the darkness in his eyes was enough to cast doom across entire continents. “He’s talkin’ about the telescope.”

You blinked away the tears, eyes burning. Realization dawned on you the moment Ghost spoke. Through your huddled position, you tried to tilt your chin down to meet his eye. As if thinking the same thing, he lifted his head, connecting your gazes. You could see that familiar apology pooling out of him, expressing everything he needed to say.

Washed away to land and shore,

shall be the looking glass for ocean eyes.

The telescope you found for Gaz was an innocent gesture. The sight of it called out to you, as if meant to be owned by you. If you would’ve known it was Graves it was calling, you would’ve thrown it into the deep sea so it could never be found again.

“So he speaks,” Graves mused sarcastically.

Ghost broke contact first, eyes boring into Graves. He looked murderous, plotting his own bloodbath with just a simple look. The dim light of the single lantern did nothing to lessen the ominous glow, only highlighting it.

“Don’t fuckin’ talk to him,” Soap hissed, scowling. The look of pure disgust was such a contrast to his normal, boyish grins.

Graves paid no mind to him, stuck in a contest with Ghost. The two of them had a dark force swirling between them, one that even outside made the air heavy and suffocating.

“A point for your bravery, Ghost,” Graves sighed dramatically, breaking his stare. He looked between each and every man, sparing you no glance while his boot remained in place. “My telescope. Give it to me, and I’ll let her go.”

You instantly shifted your eyes to look at Gaz, who seemed to be struggling with a decision. You knew why he was having a hard time—you gifted the telescope to him, unknowing of who it truly belonged to. It was something he treasured, something he didn’t want to let go of.

“I have it,” Gaz said lowly, head bowing. “It’s in my quarters. I’ll take you to it.”

Graves sucked his teeth, feigning pity. He shook his head, hand fully resting on the gun at his hip. “Not going to work on me, Gaz. I’m quite capable of getting it myself. You sit tight, aye?”

Gaz stiffened, expression growing grim. Nevertheless, he said nothing, deciding silence was the best contender for a fight bound to end in loss.

Graves gestured for the man behind Price to fetch the telescope from Gaz and Soap’s shared quarters. Price didn’t tear his eyes away from Graves once, even as the Devil of the Seas took out his own gun and pointed it right at Price’s forehead.

He pressed the barrel of the gun into Price’s forehead, indenting the skin. It was a snug fit, a perfect shot for Graves if he wished to end things the easy way.

Graves didn’t like it easy. He liked it fun.

“Scared we’ve caught on to your trail, aye?” Price bluffed, voice gravelly and malicious. “That’s why you came out here like a fuckin’ mutt, hidin’ in the storm until you found the right time to ambush us?”

“You have your dove to blame,” Graves replied nonchalantly, rubbing his boot back and forth along your side. The pressure had you sucking air through your teeth, eyes clenching shut. “She might be your new toy, but she’s just as much a mutt as I am.”

“You shut your fuckin’ mouth,” Price snarled, body shaking with feverish rage. If he could pounce on Graves, you knew he would.

“Looks like you finally grew some balls, Captain,” Graves snickered, pulling back the hammer of the gun. It resounded a loud click, which translated to a warning bell in Price’s favor. “Such anger. That anger has never worked for you, Price. It didn’t work for Ghost—it won’t work for her.”

Price let out an animalistic growl, his lips pulling back in a sneer. You’d seen the Captain angry, and you’d seen him under the guise of a scary, ominous pirate who would kill any innocent bystander that stood in his way.

This was entirely different. This was personal. A build up. This was a storm that had been coming for ages, and you were only toeing the edges.

The Shadow returned, holding the telescope you’d gifted Gaz. It shimmered in the lantern’s glow, glinting its gold details and showing it off. It felt like a goodbye.

“I’d be real careful from now on, Graves,” Price warned. It was the first you ever heard him speak so menacingly, like the demon inside of him was erupting with a stream of hot lava filled with nothing but spewing hatred. “When I find you, I’ll fuckin’ kill you myself. String you up on my sails until you’re dry, toss you into the ocean to the sharks. I’ll take pleasure in watchin’ you burn until there’s nothin’ left but ash and dust.”

Graves took the telescope from his Shadow’s hand, inspecting it. The words Price spoke clearly struck a nerve, for the arrogant grin had vanished, replaced with a gloomy, threatened expression.

“Hm,” Graves huffed, letting his gun fall and placing it back in its holster. He signaled for his men to follow suit, and you watched as all weapons dropped. “I await the day that happens, Captain. Until then, keep your mutt on a leash, aye?”

Graves made no effort to untie the crew, leaving them bound as he gathered his men to walk the plank connecting the two ship. A long, woden plank that creaked under the weight, one od wish you could kick from its balance and send them flying into the dark sea.

The moment was brutally silent as they left. Nobody moved a muscle until Graves was on his ship, the plank pulled from its placement, and the skull flag waved goodbye as they set sail into the pit of the night.

Time stood still, but the second Graves and his crew were hidden in the waves, all hell broke loose. Price and Gaz worked together to unbind each other with their backs to one another, frantic to be released. Ghost sat silently, eyes staring into the floorboards as if they’d speak to him.

“Say somethin’, dove,” Soap begged, scooting on his knees to be by your side.

As if the dam broke, you began to cry once more, heartbreaking sobs coming right from your core. You curled up tighter into your ball, your hand resting on your side as if it would magically ease the pain.

“It hurts,” you replied, voice cracking.

You’d stayed strong up until that point. Now, you couldn’t hold up your front.

You were scared. You felt more helpless than ever. You couldn’t remain strong for the sake of pretend anymore. Everything hurt, and Graves’ presence shook you to your very core.

“I know,” he cooed. He made a frustrated noise when he struggled against the binds. “I know, dove. We’re right here, alright?”

It felt strange, being on the other side of the spectrum. You were used to being the one to aid people in their injuries, but now, it was you being comforted. You couldn’t grasp what your life had become.

Price was released from his binds, quickly helping Gaz slip out of his. While Gaz made quick work to move to work on Ghost, Price was by your side in an instant.

One hand rested on your hip, turning your body towards him while the other found your face, resting his palm on it. His eyes were filled with worry when you faced him and he urgently wiped at your tears with his thumb.

“Dove,” he breathed in relief, his heart aching at the sight of you so broken. This was his fault. “You’re okay, I have you.”

You whimpered when he shifted so he could slide his arms beneath you, one under your shoulders and the other in the bend of your knees. The movement flared pain all over again, and Price murmured apologies, unsure of what to do.

He hurried to his quarters, his men following closely behind like scared dogs with their tails between their legs. Gaz held open the door, and you only caught a glimpse of his guilt-stricken expression before you were ushered in.

Price carefully slid you on to his cot, wincing every time you whimpered or cried. The pain felt excruciating, your breathing quick and labored.

“She needs a medic,” Soap stressed.

“She is a medic,” Gaz reminded, resting his hands on the edge of the cot so he could lean over and inspect your face. “We have no help besides her.”

“Well, she can’t treat herself, ye fuckin’ oaf,” Soap snipped, shooing him away from your space. “Cap, she needs to get checked. She can’t even breathe properly!”

Your head began to pound from the sheer loudness that filled the room. You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to will away the ache while simultaneously trying to correct your breathing.

You knew well enough that there was something shattered or broken. A rib, though small in theory, but dreadfully painful without the correct medicines. Not to mention the amount of force Graves had used—it was pure hell.

Price was silent, as was Ghost, the two of them sharing a conversation with just a look. There was an understanding shared, and Price gently shoved Gaz and Soap aside, replacing them.

He mimicked Gaz’s previous stance, leaning on the bed. His hand came to brush a stray tear away, frowning embedded in his mouth.

“Tell me what to do, dove,” he said softly. “I’ll do whatever it is.”

You sniffled, hand shaking where they rested on your side. You shook your head, nearly deranged from the shock and horror of it all, unable to snap out of it.

“I—I can’t fix it on my own, Captain,” you quivered, lips trembling. “It hurts.”

Price nearly broke, filled with guilt. He glanced behind him at Ghost, who quickly looked away, hands balling into fists.

“I know,” he assured calmly, brushing his finger along your cheek where he wiped the tear away. “We’ll fix it, aye? You just have to sit tight until we can. Can you do that for us, dove?”

Though you knew the wait would be cruel—a slow healing process until you could receive proper care—you found yourself nodding shamelessly, instantly trusting Price and his promises.

Price nodded along with you, giving your cheek a comforting pinch. “Attagirl,” he praised, calming your nerves.

“I’ll fuckin’ gut him,” Soap muttered, jaw pulled tight. “He’s fuckin’ dead.”

Gaz reached up to grip Soap’s nape, tugging at his hair. Soap threw him a glare, one Gaz promptly ignored, turning his attention to you.

“Listen to Cap, birdie,” Gaz encouraged warmly. “We’ll get you all fixed up. You won’t even know you’re hurtin’.”

Price had a look of hesitation when you caught his eye. You furrowed your eyebrows, frowning in confusion before he spoke again, causing you to grow uncomfortable.

“We need to check it first, dove,” he said apologetically. “If you don’t feel well with all of us bein’ here, you can pick who you prefer. No hard feelin’s, hm?”

The idea that one, if not all, had to see you undressed in order to inspect the damage was one that made you a bit dazed. You’d never been seen beneath your raggedy clothes in the village, and the same applied for your time on the ship. It felt sacred, like your vulnerability was on the line, but you had to remind yourself that it was purely medical—you’d done it plenty of times when in practice at your old home.

“It—it is fine, just… just turn away, yes?” you pleaded, unable to meet any of them in the eye.

You heard a round of shuffling, only seeing Gaz elbow Soap in the corner of your vision. Once you were sure they feasted their eyes upon the old wall, you began to carefully lift your hips, biting your lip to muffle the pained noise that threatened to leave.

The hem of your dress was swiftly pulled up past your thighs, all the way until your torso was exposed. You stopped it beneath your breasts, quick to tug the blanket over your nakedness that remained uninjured and in no need to be checked.

The anxiety that pooled in your stomach left you queasy, but you toughed through it, knowing how important it was. If you had more than a mere fracture, it could become worse over time.

“Okay,” you said quietly, cringing when they turned to take you in. The men did their best to make you feel as at ease as possible, gearing their focus towards the nasty swelling on your side.

You dared to take a peek yourself, fearing for why they were so quiet. What you saw was ugly—swollen and puffy, beaten to the point it was already turning purple and blue. It was tender to the touch, even more so without clothing as a barrier.

The worst was the gnarly, black veins that spouted out like roots, dipping deep into the new bruising. It was inhuman, something completely out of the ordinary. You knew it was Graves’ dirty work, and it reminded you of when Ghost had cut his finger in the kitchen and his blood turned black, vanishing into thin air.

When you shifted your eyes from your injury, you searched for Ghost’s, who was hard-stuck on the veins. His body was tense, a darkness swirling in his irises.

“Ghost?” Soap tried, nudging the brute lightly. “Any idea what that is?”

Ghost glanced over to Soap before returning to your side, taking in the sight. “Could be anythin’,” he muttered, unsure. “I don’t know what all he’s capable of. For all we know, it could already be infected.”

“Infected?” you asked, a worried chill racking through you.

Price reached out a careful hand to spread his fingertips along the veins. You choked on a gasp at the immediate discomfort, face scrunching up into a wince.

“We’re goin’ to a doctor,” Price nearly growled, taking his hand away. “I don’t care where. The moment we spot land, we’re goin’.”

“We still have bounties on our head, Cap,” Gaz reminded with a frown. “We can’t just go anywhere. It’s not the same as shoppin’. If we end up in the wrong place, we might get ourselves in deeper shit.”

“That is a risk I’m willin’ to take,” Price argued, firm in his stance. “If we start nitpickin’ where to go, it might be too late. You’re either in or out.”

The room fell silent as the men stared at their Captain. The answer to them was obvious, though you knew why they hesitated; if they were imprisoned, it would do you no good.

Emotions were high and the clock was ticking. It placed everyone on edge.

“I agree with Price.”

All heads turned to Ghost, who stood with his arms crossed, eyes boring into yours.

“It’s my fault she’s marked. So long as she gets fixed up, I could care less about bein’ thrown into a cell. I’m with Price,” he finished.

“Ghost—” you tried.

“I am quite firm in what I’ve decided,” he interrupted harshly before realizing his mistake, calming himself down. He looked away from you, crossing his arms a bit tighter. “I’m in no mood for arguments.”

You went quiet, watching Ghost turn towards the door and plot his escape. You knew out of everyone, he was affected the most, tormented with sickening guilt for all that’s transpired. You could only imagine how he felt, now that times had grown darker.

“Let him go,” Soap murmured softly, gaining your attention. “He’ll be alright. Let’s just worry ‘bout ye, aye?”

You were torn, but you nodded nonetheless, silently agreeing.

“You’ll stay with me for now,” Price explained. “No use in movin’ you anymore than I have. I’ll get you situated for now, and then you can rest.”

Gaz, Soap, and Price muttered amongst themselves, discussing a brief plan of what to do. The two set off to find more pillows to extend your comfort while Price remained by your side, plopping himself in his chair with a heavy sigh. His elbows rested on its arms, his fingers coming up to rub at his temple.

He looked exhausted, the bags under his eyes becoming more prominent the longer you looked.

“I am sorry, Captain,” you said quietly, eyes glueing to the ceiling.

“What have you got to be sorry for?” he asked, frowning. “Got nothin’ to apologize for, dove. Our worry stems from care.”

“Yes, but,” you paused, gathering the words, “I have caused much trouble since my arrival. Things only seem to be harder for you.”

“Life was hard before you, dove,” he assured, letting his hand fall from his face. “That’s the way it goes. It is to no fault but the world.”

You took in his words, letting them sink in. You hadn’t known a true life of trouble before, the only hardships being your utter loneliness and daily taunts from the local villagers. This was something beyond your knowledge, and you were beginning to understand that there was more to life than simply displeasuring people. There was more than what meets the eye, but there was also light at the end of every tunnel.

“You do not see me as a mere burden?” you asked, and he huffed.

“What have I told you before?” Price pressed in return, tilting his head. “You are one of us. A true pirate, if that is what you’d like.”

“I am far from a pirate,” you scoffed to yourself, ashamed. “I could not even defend myself or any of you.”

“Dove,” Price called out softly. He scooted his chair closer to your bedside, forcing you to turn your head and look at him. “A loss is not always a failure. Some wars are too big to handle on your own. There’s nothin’ wrong with that. Why must you speak so lowly of yourself?”

You stared at him unblinking, studying the furrow of his eyebrows and the curl of his lips, hidden beneath his beard. The worry lines on his forehead showed years of hardship, and you wondered how he managed to live through it if you could barely survive your own smaller ones.

“I have known nothing else,” you confessed bitterly, though not towards him. You were angry, not only with yourself, but at life for dealing its deck of cards in such an unfair way.

“I see,” he hummed, leaning back in his chair. He tapped his fingers along the armrests, getting lost in thought. “It was the same for me as well.”

Your eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Really?”

“Mhm,” he sighed, picking at the splintering wood of the armrests. “My father was a captain before me. Had the tongue of a devil. Always angry, always cold—treated me like scum, even as a child.”

“I am sorry,” you murmured quietly. Price bristled, frowning.

“That is not the point, dove,” he replied. He leaned forward to rest his elbows on the side of the bed, mere inches away from where you laid. You waited patiently for him to continue, keeping your gazes connected to show you were listening. “Some may treat you like a mutt on the street and deem your worth how they please. The only thing that matters is how you take it and how you come out of it.”

It dawned on you what he was implying. It was his way of comforting you, shielding you from your own burdening insecurities that never seemed to escape your mind.

“I could’ve remained angry and bitter, but now I captain my own ship and crew. The same applies for you—you may have experienced cruelty all your life, but you must take the reins on your own worth and decide what it is, dove.”

A blinding warmth shrouded you, like a blanket after being trapped in the icy cold, and you welcomed it with a smile. You’d never known Price to be so well with words, not int he way he was expressing now.

He knew what you needed to hear after being trapped in your own world of darkness, and he provided the light you needed to find your way out—all of them did. A glimmer of hope in a world full of loss.

“I am very thankful you kidnapped me,” you blurted, unable to contain your inner thoughts.

Price laughed, boisterous and loud, a smile washing over his face. It was a lovely sight, one that made your heart pound. Even through your pain, you found solitude in the aftermath, reaching a level of comfort you’d always wished to feel.

“I am happy to have you here despite it,” Price teased warmly. “I can say the same for the rest.”

You laughed, almost immediately regretting it at the shooting pain coursing in your side. He shot you a sympathetic smile, slowly standing from his chair.

“I will let you rest,” he said, giving you a gentle pat to your thigh over the blanket. Your heart jumped at the action, and you repressed it.

“You are not staying?” you asked, deflating.

“Soap and Gaz will be here with some more pillows soon. I must gather a plan so we can get you to a medic as soon as possible.”

It made sense, and you knew it was important. There was no telling what was flowing through the black veins, but your heart longed for more of his presence.

“Just for a moment longer?” you dared to request, voice small.

Price peered down at you from where he stood over you, a hint of surprise flashing on his expression before it softened. He nodded, reaching over to give your hand a gentle squeeze. You held on as long as you could.

“Just a moment then,” he repeated. “I will do it for you.”

You squeezed his hand in return, feeling as if you were on cloud nine. Your feelings were uncertain, but the more you spent with them, the clearer your vision became. It was an inner battle, forcing yourself to push them back in order to protect yourself. Now, though, you decided to allow yourself the comfort, just for a little while.

“Thank you,” you told him, unaware your voice had become a mere whisper. The air between you felt heavy, as if something unspoken was there.

Price glanced down at your hands that remained interlinked before shifting his gaze back at you. The gears in his mind were turning, and just as you were about to ask if it was alright, he beat you.

“I am not an emotional man,” he murmured quietly, seeming just as unsure as you were. “I make very stupid decisions and take paths I shouldn’t take. One of them is tellin’ me to kiss you, and I’m not sure if that’s alright.”

You froze in place, eyes growing wide. You were unable to look away, lost in your own little moment. Everything in you was yelling yes, yes, yes! and it was hard to ignore. You had always been weak in your feelings.

“Gaz tried to when I gifted him the telescope,” you said, unsure of why you did. “I hope that is okay.”

Price broke out into a smile, huffing out a breathy laugh. “So long as he did not beat me to it.”

You released a relieved breath, a shaky smile spreading on your lips. Price did not seem angry, and for that, you grew more enticed for a kiss. While your feelings for the others were all different in their special ways, having Price be the first was not something you could deny. It excited you more than it should.

Before you knew it, Price leaned down, capturing your lips in his own. There was no spark like you’d read in books you’d read at merchant stands when you couldn’t afford them, nor were there fireworks.

Instead, it was a calm sea that smothered you in peace, easing every worry that crowded your mind. They washed away, replaced with a warm buzz.

He was gentle, hand still grasping yours, the other coming to rest beneath your jaw. His skin was hot to the touch, rough from the callouses on his palm.

The moment wasn’t long, and when he pulled away, you wished you could reel him in for more.

“Rest,” he encouraged, his smile brighter than a thousand suns. “We’ll get you fixed up and better before you know it, alright?”

You nodded dumbly, your head empty. You were practically vibrating with excitement, the feel of his lips still tingling on yours.

He stroked his thumb over your cheekbone before pulling back, stepping away from the bed. He gave you a soft farewell, reminding you that the boys will be back soon and to try and sleep until then.

Once he was out of the room, the quiet didn’t bother you. It wasn’t maddening, driving you up a wall, suffocating you with loneliness—it was peaceful and kind, welcoming you with open arms as you slipped into unconsciousness, the images flashing behind your eyelids of the four of them in your life only bringing you true comfort after the storm.

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mothandpidgeon · 10 months ago

Text

Unrequited (bfd! pre-outbreak!/Jackson!Joel Miller x f!reader)

Moth's Masterlist // follow @mothandpidgeon-updates and turn on notifications to stay updated with my fics!

pairing: bfd! pre-outbreak!/Jackson!Joel Miller x f!reader

rating: E 18+MDNI

summary: You arrive in Jackson 22 years after the outbreak only to be reunited with your best friend’s dad, the man that stole your heart and broke it when you were fourteen– Joel Miller.

contents: best friend's dad, age gap, outbreak night (nothing that isnt in ep 1), big angst, abandonment issues, brief suicidal ideation, daddy issues, grief, Joel guilt, unprotected p in v sex, reader doesn't know where Jakarta is, reader is not described physically but Joel picks (adult) reader up, moth never uses y/n.

wc: 9k

a/n: This has been a bitch to finish but I'm quite proud of where it ended up. It's the longest os I've written which makes me nervous nobody will want to read it but I hope you do.

Thank you a million times to @ezrasbirdie for making me finish this and betaing. Also thank you @lowlights for listening to me ramble on this! Dividers by @saradika-graphics

Old man, take a look at your life. I’m a lot like you. Neil Young

You’re waiting for Sarah on the front steps when she gets home. School ended nearly two hours ago and you’ve been sitting here a ball of nerves. The whole world seems to be uneasy this afternoon. You notice sirens, a team of fighter jets scrambling above. It's like your anxiety has spilled out of your chest and it’s taken life all around you.

You finger the corner of your notebook. On the inside are doodles— hearts and bubble letters. Juvenile daydreams put to paper. Your first name and after it his last, testing out the sound of who you would be if only you’d been born in a different decade. Mrs. Miller.

Sarah doesn’t look very happy to see you. It’s been two weeks since you’ve talked to her and you’ve never felt more lonely.

Her words still ring in your ears.

“It’s like you’re in love with my dad.”

“No I'm not!” you said, your whole body tingling with the heat of embarrassment. You’d never felt so exposed in your life.

“Sometimes I think that’s the only reason you’re even friends with me,” she said.

You've been ruminating on that accusation ever since. You pine for Mr. Miller the way only a fourteen year old can. It’s the kind of infatuation that makes you understand how Romeo and Juliet ended in tragedy. All-consuming, unrequited, so in love it hurts.

So maybe Sarah’s right. Your heart flutters every time Mr Miller appears in the kitchen, wearing a dark t-shirt that hugs his biceps. You try not to stare at his aquiline nose when he drives you home from Sarah’s soccer games. Sleep overs at the Miller’s house mean more opportunities to be around him, learn the little details that make him him. And there were plenty of sleep overs because your parents are always so busy fighting, they never bother to keep track of you.

But you’ve been in agony without your friend. It’s a pain sharper and more present than the yearning you’ve felt for Mr. Miller. You’ve talked to her every day since you moved to Austin in fourth grade and since this fight, there’s been an empty space in your heart.

“Hi.” You stand up, hoisting your backpack awkwardly over your shoulder.

“I’m supposed to go next door,” Sarah says.

“Can I just talk to you for a minute?” you ask.

She sighs but opens the front door with her key and lets you follow her into the living room.

“I’m sorry,” you say before you lose your nerve. “You’re right. I like your dad.”

It’s probably the most embarrassing thing you’ve ever owned up to. You wish you could explain to her that you know how silly it is to be in love with a full grown man, your best friend’s dad. It’s not like he’ll ever see you as anything other than a kid.

You can’t put into words how he makes you feel. It’s not just his broad shoulders or chocolate eyes, though it’s undeniable that he’s gorgeous. He asks about school and comes to see you in the musical. Joel is an adult that actually gives a crap about you.

You want to tell Sarah that one of the reasons you love her father so much is because of her. Because he’s such a good dad, because he raised such a cool, funny, smart daughter. That Sarah makes him better.

It’ll take years for you to find words for all of that. So you just do your best right now.

“I can’t help it. I wish I could,” you say.

That’s true. And not just because your crush has made you lose your only friend. It’s exhausting to feel such a powerful longing, to want something you know you’ll never have. It’s torture.

“But you’re my best friend. And that’s not why. I promise,” you say.

Sarah sighs heavily, her pretty hazel eyes full of remorse.

“I’m sorry,” she says. “I shouldn’t have said that. I just get jealous sometimes.”

“I promise I won’t make you feel that way ever again. I could never like him more than you,” you tell her, sitting beside her on the couch and looking her in the eye so she knows you mean it. “He’s…old.”

You both laugh.

“He’s so lame. This morning he said that Jakarta is in the Middle East,” she giggles.

You don’t know where the hell Jakarta is but of course Sarah does. You throw your arms around her. You’ve missed her so damn much. The past two weeks have felt like two decades.

“I’m sorry,” you tell her.

“Me too.” She returns your embrace. “Do you have to go home? You can sleep over if you want. It’s my dad’s birthday but I don’t think he’s going to be home until late.”

Your heart twinges at the offer and not because it means you might see Mr. Miller at breakfast. You won’t even look at him again. Tonight is about your friend.

You end up watching some corny action movies and gorging yourselves on microwave popcorn. Everything feels right again. You don’t think about Mr. Miller. In fact, you’re grateful that his double has gone over into a late night so you don’t have to be in the same room. You’ve sworn to yourself that you’ll act normal around him but you’re not sure that sheer willpower can stop you from getting butterflies when he’s right there.

At some point, you pass out in front of the tv, happier than you’ve been in a long time.

Sarah nudges you awake sometime after midnight, concern all over her face.

“Was I snoring?” you ask, groggy.

She’s looking out the window. Helicopters fly so low overhead, the whole house rattles. It’s a wonder you slept through all of this noise— the choppers are joined by the wail of a car alarm, pops like fireworks. The TV is playing a high-pitched tone and when you peer at it, you see a test pattern on the screen.

Dread settles in the pit of your stomach.

“Something’s going on,” Sarah says almost to herself.

A sudden thud against the back door makes you both jump. You swear, shaken out of your sleepy haze.

“Mercy?” Sarah asks.

You’ve spent enough time with Sarah to become acquainted with their neighbors The Adlers and their border collie Mercy. Mr Adler used to pay you each a dollar to walk him. Mercy’s frantically pawing at the glass.

Sarah goes to the door and steps into the yard. You follow, unsure you want to leave the familiar safety of the house but unwilling to be alone with such an eerie feeling in the air.

“What’re you doing out here, boy?” Sarah says, crouching down to pet the whimpering animal.

“Where’s your dad?” you ask her.

You hope the question doesn’t make Sarah think you’ve already forgotten your promise. Everything’s just so wrong. You’d feel a lot better with an adult around.

“Don’t think he came home yet,” she says. You can hear the concern in her voice. “Let’s take Mercy back. The Alder’s will be home.”

Mercy puts up a fight as Sarah pulls him across the lawn. It’s late and dark save the street lamp and a few porch lights that have been left on. You shiver despite the fact that it’s a warm southern night.

The front door to the Adler’s house stands open and inside is black. No. Bad. You want to run back to the Miller’s house and lock the door behind you but the promise of Mr. And Mrs. Adler inside keeps you moving towards the darkened entrance. Maybe Mrs. Adler will give you some cookies while you wait for Mr. Miller.

Sarah steps in first. The dog bucks and strains against her grip on his collar. Sarah fights to keep hold of him but Mercy’s thrashing makes him hard to pin down. He pulls free from Sarah’s grasp and darts away.

You have half a mind to do the same but Sarah keeps going forward. She’s scared, too, her breaths shallow as she tip toes down the hall.

“Mrs. Adler?” Sarah asks, her voice barely above a whisper.

You reach for each other without even realizing it and you enter the kitchen holding hands.

What you see there is beyond your wildest imaginings. There’s blood, a lot of it. Sarah’s shoe slides in the stuff and you grab her before she loses her balance. The room is cast in shadows but a street light streams through the window in the side door. Its beam falls over the form of Mr. Adler, limp on the floor. His back is against the door and a gush of dark blood sparkles in the sodium vapor.

You’ve never seen so much blood, never seen anyone injured so brutally. It looks like he’s been attacked by some wild animal. Mercy was acting strange but the dog couldn’t do that.

“Help me,” he rasps.

He’s speaking to you. You’re actually here. This is happening and you need to do something.

But before you can form a coherent thought, your eyes travel deeper into the kitchen. Beside the island is more blood…and more bodies.

As if seeing Sarah’s neighbor with his neck ripped open wasn’t enough of a horror, you’re now watching Nana hunched over Mrs. Adler’s corpse, her face buried in the younger woman’s neck. The scene before you makes no sense. Most of the time the old woman is barely conscious, hasn’t left her wheelchair in years and yet she’s on all fours before you looking feral.

Sarah squeezes your hand so tight you’re afraid your knuckles will break.

Nana slowly raises her face to you. Her eyes are pitch black and her mouth teems with twitching tendrils. You are staring at a living, breathing monster.

When she leaps at you, you and Sarah bolt for the door. Your heart hammers against your ribs. Sarah makes it out first and races towards the sidewalk.

Once you’ve gotten onto the front step, you slam the storm door shut behind you to trap whatever that thing is inside. SLAM. Nana collides with the door and it rattles violently. You hold it closed with every ounce of strength in you, listening to the creature behind it scratch and wail and willing yourself not to look through the glass to see its horrible face. Terror holds your muscles taught. You’re not sure how long you can stay like this, your sneakers skidding across the ground.

With a roar, Uncle Tommy’s truck pulls up at that very moment and Mr. Miller hops out of the passenger seat before its even come to a full stop. He’s a fearsome sight, broad and rippling with untamed energy, his muscular arms outlined by the headlights of the car. You’ve never been more grateful for his presence.

This nightmare is almost over. Joel’s come to save you.

“Girls get in the car!” he bellows. His voice is raw and ragged.

Just as you’re ready to make a run for it, The door flings out towards you, and you’re thrown aside as if you weigh nothing. You hit the driveway hard, your head connecting with concrete.

For a moment, you can’t hear anything but the gush of blood pumping in your ears. You’re dizzy. Suffocating. There’s a warm trickle at your temple. Sarah calls your name. Your vision is blurred but you can make out the ghoulish form of the creature barreling towards her.

“What’re we doing, Joel?” you hear Tommy ask.

There’s a thud and then quiet.

You gasp again and again but your lungs won’t fill.

Are you dying? Help. You need help. The monster lays lifeless at Joel’s feet and you pray that he’ll scoop you up and take you away from this. Your eyes finally come into focus to see Mr. Miller comforting Sarah, holding her face in his big palms, so fixated on her that he doesn’t notice that Mr. Adler has appeared in the doorway.

Mr. Adler is still covered in so much blood and his gait has become twitchy as if his legs are on backwards. He moves towards them and you want to call out a warning but you’re still choking for air. Luckily he hasn’t noticed you but he soon stands between you and the Millers.

“We’ve got to move,” Tommy says.

“Get in the car,” Mr. Miller says to Sarah, throwing a protective arm in front of her.

“But she’s hurt!”

She steps towards you. You’d cry her name but you’ve still got the wind knocked out of you and you’re too terrified to make a noise. Mr. Adler makes an inhuman sound as he advances, a croaking, growling gurgle.

Mr. Miller pushes Sarah towards the truck.

“Leave her!” he barks. “Get in the car!”

You sputter and choke as you watch Sarah, Joel, and Tommy drive away.

You wait for a long time.

As the truck pulls off of the curb, Mr. Adler is joined by his wife in the street, making chase. You’re finally able to draw breath and rouse your body off of the ground. You scramble back across the lawn to the Miller’s house and lock yourself inside. There’s enough adrenaline coursing through you that you’re able to push the sofa to barricade the front door. You draw all of the curtains and grab the biggest knife you can find in the kitchen. It’s ridiculous, something you’ve seen in scary movies, but you’re living in one right now.

You hide yourself away. Sarah’s bedroom seems like the obvious place to do it. Familiar and safe. You curl yourself into a ball in the corner, clutching your knife and staring at the closed door with wild eyes.

Sirens go through the night. Gunshots. At one point even the roar of a jet engine.

For hours your body quivers as you try to make sense of what you’ve just witnessed. Flesh-eating mutants. Gore. Death. You keep waiting to wake up from a bad dream but you don’t. They left you. They abandoned you in a nightmare.

No. That’s impossible. You can accept that a comatose elderly woman made supper out of her son in law but you refuse to believe that Joel would desert you.

He’ll come back for you. Sarah will convince him. There’s always been room for you in their family.

But as the sun begins to peek through the blinds and the noises outside fade away, you begin to lose hope.

The muscles in your body go slack, exhausted from hours of uncontrollable shaking. Your instinct for survival and your need for sleep war with each other. Exhaustion is winning.

You cautiously open the door to Sarah’s room. The house is still, more quiet than you’ve ever experienced. You creep into the room at the end of the hall. The olive green sheets on Joel’s bed are still messy from when he woke up here the day before. A normal morning. His birthday.

You rest the knife on the night stand amongst the things he emptied from his pockets— coins, receipts, a stray nail. You slip into the bed and wrap yourself up. It smells like him— spicy deodorant and sweat, fresh cut lumber like the hardware store. The scent reminds you of all those times he was close, when your heart leapt.

They’ll come back. Mr. Miller wouldn’t leave you.

He left you to die but you just go on living.

It takes some time before you’re brave enough to leave the Miller’s house and see what’s left of the world. Your parents are nowhere to be found. It’s safe to assume they were infected that first night.

You’re on your own.

A QZ is set up outside of San Antonio. They assign you to housing for separated minors. An orphanage. You never make friends, not really. Trust is too fickle.

At night you lay in your bunk and wonder what life would be like if anybody gave a shit about you. Maybe you would have been with your parents when it all went down. You’d be a snarling monster but at least you wouldn’t be alone.

On the worst nights, when you like yourself the least, Mr. Miller’s words echo around your skull. “Leave her.” She's not worth it. Forget her.

You don’t imagine yourself in his arms anymore. Instead you picture him and Sarah and Uncle Tommy, all happy and safe hiding out somewhere idyllic. A sweet little cabin with a stream nearby, surrounded by peaceful woods. You’ve heard some people live like that.

Some days you wish you were with them. Others you wish they were all dead.

When you turn 18, you age out of your living situation. It couldn’t come soon enough. Things are changing and it seems like all the kids that stay in FEDRA school are being groomed to go straight into uniform. You dodged that bullet but life’s not easy. Now you’re well and truly alone, scraping by to keep food in your mouth and a roof over your head.

It only lasts a few years, though. By the time you’re 21, there’s an emergency evacuation. Outbreaks are happening within the walls and with so many people living on top of each other, it’s only a matter of time before shit hits the fan. They send swaths of people to Dallas but word is, there’s no room for such numbers and they consider everyone from San Antonio an infection risk.

You’ve heard enough stories to know what that means. There won’t be a warm welcome when you reach the next QZ. So you ditch the convoy and head north.

You bounce around for years, sometimes with others, a lot of time solo. Doing what you have to. It’s not a life, just survival.

By the time you reach the wilds of Wyoming, you’ve had enough. You break off from the group you’re traveling with. You leave them this time, just decide to walk into the forest and let the earth swallow you up. You’re exhausted, sick of hanging on by a thread. Too much of a coward to kill yourself, you wander around waiting for the cold or your hunger or a bear to do it for you.

They find you. Some scouts that look mean and tough take pity on you and offer you a place with them in a commune where things are half normal.

It’s the first time being alone has worked to your advantage.

Jackson is a strange place. It has walls like the QZ but it’s quaint. There’s laughter and evergreen wreaths, happy children that build snowmen in the center of town. Some of these kids have no idea how fucked up the world has become. All they know is this charming little haven.

You spend the first few days in the infirmary, getting patched up, regaining your strength. You feel like an animal compared to the people in your new community. It’s hard to accept that they’re willing to help you, no strings attached.

Eventually you’re well enough to have your own place. They set you up with a little apartment over one of the stores in town. You’re invited to take your meals in the dining hall.

It takes you back to those first days at your new middle school after you came to Austin. Unfortunately, this time Sarah’s not there to offer you a seat at her lunch table.

You keep to yourself, overwhelmed by all of the strange new faces. Head down, you eat your breakfast. It’s the best food you’ve had in years. As your belly fills, you start to relax and try to get used to the idea of this being home.

Then you hear a familiar voice say your name. You wonder if you’re hallucinating when you see him standing in front of you.

He’s gained a few decades but he looks good. His hair is nearly shoulder length and there’s a mustache on his upper lip but that’s him alright.

“Uncle Tommy?” you manage.

“That really you?” he asks.

Tommy puts a gentle hand on your shoulder. His smile wrinkles the corners of his eyes. You nod and you’re smiling too.

You expect to be upset. Tommy was there when you were abandoned after all. But you’re flooded with relief and a small flame of hope.

“Shit. What’re the chances?” he asks, studying your face. “C’mere.”

He pulls you through the lines of tables. Your head spins with questions. How did he end up in Wyoming of all places? How long has he been here? Did you actually die out there only to be sent to this strange afterlife?

“You remember this old son of a bitch?” Tommy asks with a chuckle when he stops at the table in a far corner.

And suddenly you’re face to face with Mr. Miller.

He’s old. Grey hairs run through his stubble and curl from his temple. There are deep lines in his face. He’s still good looking despite how weathered his features have become, still broad, still with that wonderful silhouette.

It’s funny. In your mind’s eye, you’ve never imagined Joel aging. He stayed the same while you grew up.

He looks at you for a long moment and then his thick bottom lip falls agape. His eyes glitter and his dimple appears as he recognizes the woman that you’ve become.

“Kiddo,” he whispers as he stands up.

He pulls you into a hug and his wide palm smooths down your back. He still smells just how you remember and without warning you’re sobbing into the front of his flannel.

You spent hours upon hours imagining what you might say if you ever saw him again. Sometimes it was a speech biting with venom, others a confession, a question. Now, though, your mind is blank, overwhelmed that fate has brought you back together. A testament to your survival.

“It’s alright, babygirl. You’re okay,” he says into your hair. Words you needed to hear all those years ago.

You stay like this for a long time, surrounded by him. He holds you the way you wished he had as you cried into his pillow in that empty house. Eventually you pull yourself together with a shaking breath.

“Where’s Sarah?” you ask, casting your eyes around the crowd in the mess hall.

There’s a girl sitting beside Joel, her curly hair pulled back into a ponytail, watching this scene unfold. Everyone else is polite enough to pretend you’re not bawling in the middle of lunch. Can’t be the first time it’s happened.

At your question, Tommy goes stone faced. The muscle in Joel’s jaw ticks.

You shake your head in disbelief. “Infected?” you squeak out.

“It wasn’t like that,” Joel chokes.

“She didn’t make it through that first night,” Tommy says.

It’s a punch in the gut, the air’s knocked out of your chest all over again. While it had crushed you to be abandoned, part of you understood. Joel had to choose and he picked his daughter. Even if he’d been in love with you the way you used to dream about, he always would have chosen Sarah. You couldn’t hold that against him, no matter how much it hurt. There just wasn’t anyone in the world that would have saved you.

But knowing that he failed her, that he failed you both, makes you sick. All those years of bitterness come flooding back to you and your tears turn hot and furious.

“You let her die?” you demand. “You told her to leave me behind and you didn’t even save her?” You push Joel, your hands against the wet spots you left on his shirt. It’s ineffectual. He barely moves against your pathetic shove but his face crumples. You know he hates himself as much as you do in that moment but that’s not enough. You hit him as hard as you can and he does nothing to defend himself.

“Hey, hey,” Tommy says, trying a hand on your shoulder.

“You should’ve saved her,” you bark.

Heads have turned now as Tommy holds you back.

“I hoped you were dead every day since you left me,” you say.

You can see on his face that Joel’s definitely wished the same thing.

You go on berating him, your tears mixing with spit as you snarl and shout, until Tommy’s able to wrestle you out of the dining hall.

The summer comes. After a long, cold winter, everyone in Jackson welcomes the change of seasons with open arms. Everyone but Joel.

Ellie was a salve for the deep wounds on his heart. They’ll never fully heal but at least they stopped overwhelming him for some time. Since your dramatic reunion, though, those scars have been torn open once more. Especially today.

It’s warm and there’s barely a cloud in the sky. The July weather is mild compared to summers in Texas. Fresh air blows in through the open windows of the house, beckoning Joel outside but he has no desire to be in the sunshine.

“You okay?” Ellie asks.

She’s just come down the stairs. It’s early and Joel’s already at the kitchen table. Didn’t sleep much.

He and Ellie have been together long enough that she understands the wordless shifts in his moods. They’ve gotten worse since you arrived in Jackson. He does his work and patrols, sometimes he nurses a whiskey alone at the bar. The rest of the time he keeps to himself. He’s sliding back towards the man she met back in Boston. Joel’s rebuilt the walls that surrounded him, brick by brick since that afternoon in the dining hall.

“I was going to meet Dina at the mess. Want to come? Or I could stick around?” she offers.

It’s going to be one of those dark days, the kind that makes him question why he’s been hanging on for so long, and Ellie knows it. She’s giving him a lifeline, offering to be with him so he doesn’t have to ask. He should accept it, but he doesn’t want to waste his energy putting on a brave face for her when he feels so broken.

“That’s alright, Ellie. Go on,” he says.

She doesn’t push him. She never does. She just gives a sympathetic smile before she slips out.

Once seems gone, his heart begins to ache.

Sometime later, there’s a knock at the door. The last person he expects to see on the porch is you. You look a little nervous, like if he’d taken longer to come to the door you might’ve bolted.

He hasn’t spoken to you since that day that you came back into his life but the words you said play relentlessly on loop in his mind. He should have made amends by now. You were his daughter’s best friend and of all the places at the end of the world, you’ve ended up in the same town. He passes by the old pharmacy you live above just about every day, thinks about seeing if you’re in so you can have a conversation. He even knows what he’d say, but he can’t work up the courage. There aren’t any words that can make right what he did to you.

The guilt metastasized deep in his gut. His failure compounded.

So he doesn’t blame you for keeping your distance, avoiding him when your paths cross. He lets you be angry with him, as he deserves.

“Want some company?” you ask.

He recognizes the look on your face and it dawns on him that he might not be the only person struggling today. He steps aside to let you in.

Joel sets a cup of tea down in front of you. It’s not the real thing. Dried herbs from the garden Maria keeps. You’ve taken a seat across from him at the table, glancing around the kitchen so you don’t have to look at him.

“Surprised you remember,” he says.

“My best friend’s birthday?”

He shrugs as he pulls up a chair across from you. “Was a long time ago.”

“I think you underestimate the power of female friendships.”

You wear a soft smile that makes Joel’s heart ache a little harder. He takes a good look at you, seeing you up close for the first time. There are hints of the girl he knew back in Austin but she’s buried under years of hard living.

You’re the same age Sarah would have been today. The same age he was when he lost everything.

You sigh and scratch awkwardly at your neck.

“Listen, I’m sorry about…all that shit I said. It’s…” you trail off and he’s sure you’re still mad at him, deep down.

“I reckon I’m the one that owes an apology. I shouldn’t’ve left you back there. Sarah begged me not to,” he admits. “I was trying to keep her safe. But I fucked that up, too.”

“That’s not true. I was just angry,” you tell him.

“I was always so pissed at your parents for not caring enough about you. Turns out I was just as bad,” he says.

He hadn’t given any thought to the choice he made all those years ago. His priority was his family and he had no room for the rest of humanity. Joel didn’t realize until he saw your face again just how selfish that had made him. The past months he’s been haunted by the thought of it, a young thing all alone in the chaos. If Sarah’s watching over him, which sometimes he hopes she is, she’d be ashamed.

“I’ve had a lot of time to think since I got here and…I don’t blame you. I’m not your kid. It just—“ You laugh without humor. “God, it’s so stupid but I had a huge crush on you.”

Joel’s eyebrows shoot up. You fiddle with the chipped handle on your mug.

“I know. I was just a kid but I was head over heels for you,” you say.

Joel can feel himself blushing. It’s a sweet thought. He’s honored in a strange way. He remembers the gravity of Sarah’s crushes– Leonardo DiCaprio, Usher, some guy with a lip ring from one of those punk bands she listened to.

“So when you left me…I was a little heart broken.”

“Shit,” Joel says.

“I didn’t say that to make you feel bad. I just wanted you to know why I was so hurt,” you tell him, leaning forward in your seat. “You didn’t know any of that. And it’s not fair to hang that over your head. It wasn’t your job to rescue me.”

“Course it was,” Joel responds. “You were just a kid. I let you down.”

You look at him gratefully and a tear slips down your cheek. It takes a minute for you to fully take that in and it seems like something you’ve needed to hear.

“Joel. I forgive you,” you tell him.

A thick knot forms in his throat.

There’s a litany of names in his mind, so many people he’s failed. Henry and Sam. Tess. Sarah. He’s never expected to be absolved of any of his sins, he doesn't deserve to be forgiven. But those three words make him feel lighter, like he can stop beating himself up. At least for a moment.

He tucks his chin into his chest trying to keep his own tears from spilling over. Your hand slips over his, a gentle, reassuring touch.

The two of you stay like that for a little while, crying together, then becoming reacquainted. You talk for a long time. There’s a lot of catching up to do but the conversation keeps coming back to Sarah. It’s a gift to share memories of her, to hear stories that he’s never heard. You knew Sarah better than anyone in the world— her favorite store in the mall, what she wanted for her birthday. Her hopes, her dreams, her fears. No fourteen year old goes to her daddy with her problems. You were there for her, though. Right up until the end.

“I, um, you should have this,” you say. “Well, it’s yours.”

You and Joel have migrated to the couch in the living room as the afternoon has crept on. You reach into your back pocket, a little reluctant, and pull something out.

It’s a photograph, dog eared and creased from years of being carried with you. Joel recognizes the picture— you and him and Sarah, all three of you donning life jackets, smiling as you float on a calm river. He and Tommy took Sarah kayaking and she asked if you could tag along. It was a wonderful day. Blue, cloudless sky.

The last time he saw the photo it was hanging under a magnet on the refrigerator in the kitchen.

“How’d…”

“I stayed in your house for a while. After. Just kind of hoping you might come back. I took that when I left. And I ate all your food,” you say with a little chuckle. You wipe some snot from your nose. “I guess…well, you probably don’t have a lot of pictures of her.”

You’re right. There was an outdated school photograph in his wallet when they left that night and it had been too painful to look at for years. It still stings a little but it feels easier to share with someone, someone that knew her so well.

“You sure?” he asks.

You nod. “I know where to find it.”

He props the picture up on the coffee table so you can both look at it and meditate on that day when everything felt so perfect.

“Remember we made you play “Crazy in Love” on on repeat the whole way there?” you ask.

“I still get that goddamn song stuck in my head,” he complains.

You laugh and rest your head on his shoulder. The familiar gesture cracks something open inside of him. He’s taken back to his favorite nights when he’d watch a movie with Sarah and she’d cuddle against him. Somehow the memory doesn’t hurt as much as he anticipates.

You sit like that, looking at the picture, both quiet, your smiles fading as you remember what’s happened since.

“Sometimes I think I see her,” he chokes.

He’s never told anyone that. But it seems like you might understand, He trusts you won’t meet his admission with a pitying smile.

“How’s she look?” you ask.

He can’t help but chuckle. He nods.

You don’t say anything, you just burrow your head a little deeper into him. Joel puts a gentle kiss in your hair.

You’re a fixture in the Miller house once again, part of the family. You babysit for Maria and tell her embarrassing stories about Tommy. You and Ellie tease Joel relentlessly. You sit with him in the evenings, sometimes singing along when he pulls out his guitar, other nights neither of you speak at all.

Slowly, you find yourself falling in love with him all over again. It’s not the same infatuation you harbored when you were young. You’re both different people. And you hardly knew him back then. Not really. What did a fourteen year old know about grown men?

The two of you fall into an easy rhythm. After being alone for such a long time, it’s magical to have a companion. Joel seems grateful for the company, too. He’s there whenever you turn around, like a promise. He’s not leaving you behind even if you’re just going from the stables to the library.

Neither of you acknowledge it, this easy rapport. A light squeeze on your shoulder, holding your hand when you get misty eyed. He probably doesn’t mean anything by it but you’re pretty sure you can’t live without it. You bask in the sweetness of these exchanges, trying not to think too hard about the fact that you used to spend Saturday nights giggling on his daughter’s bedroom floor.

He’s still Mr. Miller, after all.

Autumn comes and you’re inseparable. You realize just how much when you convince him to attend the children’s choir performance in town. You expect him to demure. Watching kids being kids must be painful. But he’s by your side in the dining hall as the little ones sing “Clementine” and “Oh Susanna”.

He puts his arm around your shoulder so you can lean into him. It might just be a paternal gesture, maybe you’re still a little girl in his eyes. That’s ok with you if he keeps absentmindedly massaging your upper arm. You can’t remember the last time you felt so safe, so loved.

Afterwards, he walks you home and you’re in such a good mood, you start singing to yourself.

“Johnny Cash,” he says approvingly.

You laugh to yourself. “You know, I started listening to him ‘cause of you. You had his CD in your truck,” you admit.

You wanted to like all of the things Joel liked. He would think you were so interesting and grown up because you knew all the words to “Riders in the Sky.”

“Least I was a good influence,” Joel says, shaking his head, his cheeks turning pink.

He’s so handsome when he blushes, you feel a little giddy when you come to stop in front of the old pharmacy.

“G’night, darlin’,” he says, giving your hand one last squeeze.

He waits. He’ll stand here and watch you get inside like he always does. He doesn’t need to— it’s not like people even lock their doors in Jackson— but he’s insisted on it so fervently that you stopped arguing.

You shouldn’t do it. It’s so silly. But there’s a softness in his eyes and his gentle touch still tingles on your arm. His salt and pepper hair is caught in the string lights that line the empty street. You can’t help yourself.

You kiss him, smoothing your palms up the front of his flannel until you sink your fingers into the curls at the base of his neck. The tip of his nose is cold from the chill in the evening air but his lips are warm and sweet.

You haven’t had a whole lot of experience kissing. You’d just started doing it when the outbreak happened and things haven’t been very romantic since. This is one of the better ones. Relatively chaste but unbearably tender. Certainly better than you could have imagined all those years ago.

It lasts longer than you expect. Joel kisses you back. He rests his hand on your waist and the way it covers so much of your back makes you swoon. Soon, though, he’s pulling away, cradling your cheek.

“We shouldn’t do that,” he says.

“I know,” you sigh. You’re reluctant to break away, savoring the brush of his nose against yours.

It’s all wrong but you’re not ashamed for trying it.

“Just once. I’ve always wanted to,” you say.

He presses his lips into your forehead. It feels bittersweet. A kiss you longed for for twenty years came and went.

You wave to him from the door before you go in for the night.

That kiss confirms Joel’s fears.

He’s spent months convincing himself that this is completely platonic. He would never have feelings for his daughter’s best friend. Even if he always wants to be around you.

He’s looking after you, comforting you, protecting you. He’s making up for those years that he made you suffer through. You forgave him but he’ll never stop atoning.

And then you kissed him.

Suddenly, he’s buried in an avalanche of thoughts he’s been disavowing.

You’re pretty and soft. You're strong and you ease the pain of his memories. You make him feel a little less alone.

The warmth of your lips, your body pressed to his. He was ready to lose himself in you.

That’s when he heard it.

It was Sarah’s voice chiding him with all the reasons why this is wrong.

She’s been in his head, his inner critic since the day she died, pointing out every failure and weakness in him. He could picture her looking down on him with disgust. She’s the same age as your daughter. She was just a kid when you met her. She deserves better than you.

He’s making the same mistake as before, letting his instinct get the better of him. The responsible part of him takes control. He can’t give you any more reasons to try and kiss him again.

If Joel is good at one thing it’s denying himself.

He backs off and you can sense it, he knows you do. Sometimes he catches you looking at him and there’s a longing in your eye. It fucking kills him but it’s just another reason why he’s no good for you.

Despite whatever it does to you, you haven’t got anybody else in Jackson so you stick around. He can only imagine how much it hurts you.

“Why did I go north?” you complain when Joel opens the front door. You’re holding a scarf tight around your neck, shivering against the cold. The sky is a dismal shade of gray, snowfall on the horizon.

Joel gets you in the house with a chuckle. He starts a fire, a luxury you little apartment doesn’t afford. You shiver in front of the hearth.

“Traded for this,” you say, pulling a thick book out of your coat and tossing it onto the coffee table.

“Oh good. I was looking for some light reading material,” Ellie quips from her spot on the couch.

“It’s a dictionary,” you explain, “so you’ll quit cheating at Boggle.”

“You're in trouble now,” Joel laughs.

“I don’t cheat. I just know more words than you guys,” she says.

“Dentment is not a word,” you reply.

“Neither is thoard,” Joel says.

“Sure it is. I’m about to thoard the two of you in this game,” she says.

This should be enough. A winter day by the fire. The simple joy of a board game. Laughter. This is practically a normal life.

But each time Joel’s eyes fall on you, there’s a pang in his chest. You’re just close enough that he could reach out and touch you but he won’t. He can’t.

When the sun sets, Ellie retreats to her room. Eventually, you fall asleep on the couch, wrapped up in a quilt as the fire dies down. You look even younger, curled up serenely. There’s no worry on your brow. Usually your face is in a perpetual frown even when you’re not in a mood.

The snow is already knee deep with no signs of slowing. There’s no sense in sending you back out there.

Joel scoops you up as gently as he can. He feels his age, back straining, but he doesn’t mind. He enjoys how you nestle your face into his chest as he mounts the stairs, warm and snug in his arms. A smile pulls at his lips.

He sets you down carefully on his bed and you whimper groggily at the loss of his touch. Your eyes crack open.

“Snowing pretty bad. Sleep here. I’ll be on the couch,” he whispers.

“Stay,” you murmur.

He hesitates. Carrying you to bed was already crossing a line. He’s not worried about keeping his hands to himself. He’s been able to control himself for this long. If he lays down next to you, feeling you warming his sheets, smelling the peppermint soap on your skin, he’ll be so far gone for you, there’ll be no coming back.

But denying you this simple request feels cruel. He imagines you waking up here all alone. You’re half asleep but what if you remember asking him to remain only to be abandoned again?

He gets into bed, still fully clothed and careful to stay on his side. His jaw is clenched so tightly his teeth hurt. You give a satisfied hum and sink back into sleep, your body melting into the mattress.

Joel watches you for a moment, fights the urge to put a kiss on your forehead. He crosses his arms and stares at the ceiling, beginning to tangle with the web of emotions that accompany you. Once it gets too confusing, he drifts off as well.

When you reach out for him in your sleep, he can’t deny you. Joel tries his hardest to pretend it doesn’t feel good, that this isn’t something he’s wanted to do. So he imagines the nightmares that come to you. Reminds himself that you wouldn’t have seen any of that shit if he hadn’t left you for dead. Now that you're in his arms, he’ll make sure nothing touches you ever again. The least he can do is hold you and make sure it goes no further.

You both find reasons that you should stay the night. Neither of you acknowledge it. Joel just hands you one of his t-shirts and busies himself as you slip out of your clothes and get under the covers. It’s all rather innocent, Joel does more than rub your back even though you sometimes feel his morning wood through his sweatpants. If he wants you, he doesn’t let himself have you. And he could.

It’s fine with you if cuddling is all this is. You don’t try to do anything more than that, unwilling to upset the unspoken agreement between you. You can be satisfied with a broad, firm chest to rest your back against. Sleep is better beside him, his heart beats guiding your own. The weight of his arm draped across you makes your body feel deliciously heavy.

After a while, though, it happens.

Joel’s having a nightmare. His murmurs and restless movements wake you. His mouth twitches and his brow is creased. You smooth circles into his shoulder until his eyes open. Even in the darkness you can see the despair in them.

He blinks, coming back to reality, remembering he’s not wherever his dreams took him. You brush your fingers through his hair, gazing at one another as his breaths even out. Normally, his age is obvious– the lines in his forehead, the sun spots on his cheek– yet right now he looks young. Like a boy that needs to sleep with a night light.

You’re not sure who initiates but you find each other in the dark. At first he’s not kissing you at all, his lips are just brushing your cheek or your nose. It’s sweet and gentle. You try to hold in a moan, worried that any noise might shatter this moment.

The kisses are timid as if you’re both waiting for someone to stop this. Joel lets out a shuddering breath against you. This is a bad idea, you’re both thinking it. After you kissed him the last time, he held you at arms length. When this blows up, you’ll lose him entirely. But you need to be closer to him.

You open your mouth to him, tangle your legs between his. His hand slides under your shirt, roaming your bare skin. You thought that snuggling under the blanket was enough but now you realize just how hungry you’ve been to be touched. Really touched. He needs it too. Joel leans into your hand on his jaw with a whimper.

You don’t open your eyes. You might be the one dreaming and you don’t want to wake up.

It’s quiet, just the sound of hot breaths and desperate kisses, the swish of the sheets as you shift your hips to meet his. You keep yourself from rocking against him, try to enjoy the feeling of him without crossing yet another line, but you’re aching. His shirt has ridden up so you feel the softness of his middle, the light hairs on his chest. Your fingers intertwine with his as his mouth trails down the column of your neck and. Joel buries his face there.

“I’m sorry,” he breathes.

You’re not sure what he’s apologizing for. This? Then? The years in between? None of it matters because you want to live in this moment forever.

You shush him, pull him back to your mouth. You’re ready to lose yourself, to forget, to ignore the storm of thoughts constantly plaguing your mind. This is all you want.

You peel off your clothing, helping him slide out of his sweatpants until there’s nothing between you. Joel’s skin is warm and soft against you and you realize you’ve never been this close to another soul.

When Joel settles over you and you feel him throbbing between his legs, you shiver with nervous anticipation. You expect him to say something, to warn you that this is a bad idea, to promise this won’t change anything. But his brown eyes look as confused with need as you feel. There’s no room for thinking or it will crush this fragile moment like glass.

You tilt your hips to allow him in, already slick from being so close to him.

Slowly, he enters you, kissing you all the while. He makes a choked sound, wincing as his body stills. The noise makes you clench around him.

Together you take a moment to get your bearings and you adjust to the fullness of him. Joel’s eyes are pressed shut, his teeth digging into his bottom lip.

Before he begins to move, his thumb finds your clit, grazing it lightly. After years of solitude and now months being just out of reach of him, the sensation makes you gasp sharply.

You’ve had sex a handful of times. They had been more about fulfilling a self destructive urge than a desire for pleasure. It’s never been like this.

You start to lose sense of everything but the feelings of your body. Your core tenses and your breaths go short and you start to forget that it’s Joel whose hips are stuttering into you. It’s as if this euphoria can erase some of those awful memories.

Soon you’re shattering beneath him, a crescendo that has you tugging on his hair and gasping for air. Joel grunts into your ear. He follows after you, hissing as he pulls out of you. He pulses into his hand, his release dripping from his fist onto your sweat damp skin. Then he collapses onto you. You run your fingers through his long curls and he kisses your forehead. There might be tears in your eyes– maybe his too. It’s too dark to be sure– but when his breath evens out, it still sounds ragged against you.

Eventually he gets out of bed and leaves the room and, in that moment, you can feel everything hanging over your head again– what you’ve just done, the horrors of the world. Perhaps even more intense than before.

But Joel returns quickly. He flicks on the light on his bed side table and cleans you with a damp rag. His touch is gentle, reverent, and his dark eyes travel over your naked skin to yours. There’s a question in them, guilt, but you have no regrets. You smooth your hand out on the sheets beside you and he lays back on his pillow. He surrounds you with his massive arms and you fall asleep grateful that you don’t feel abandoned anymore.

You worry that it was just a one time thing, try to accept that it might never happen again. But the next time you share Joel’s bed, he’s pulling you into him, pressing kisses into your shoulder, nuzzling at the spot behind your ear. His hard length prods at the small of your back.

It starts like that every time. Intimate, sensual, quiet. It’s never tearing his clothes off or pushing you up against a wall. You just stay close, breath each other in, trail fingertips across skin. Neither of you ever speak above a whisper.

Joel barely talks at all except to ask, “That too much?” and “Feel good?”

You live for the moments when his hand skates over your hip, his dark eyes soft.

“Pretty,” he says almost to himself.

He’s such a beautiful man. Your fingers trace the smooth plane of his chest, dusted lightly with hair and a few stray freckles. Age has only improved him. The greys in his stubble catch the glow from the lamp on the nightstand. You study him with the same attention to detail you used in your youth. The cleft in his bottom lip, the dimples on his lower back, the scar on his temple. You’ve memorized it all.

Joel breaks open for you. He lets you see him vulnerable. He’ll fuck you with thrusts that shake loose deep emotions. Just as quickly, he’ll hold you together when it feels like you’re falling apart.

You lay with him after, sticky with the shared heat of your bodies but reluctant to roll away and break the connection.

Whatever this is, you don’t speak its name. There are too many questions and conflicts that it might not withstand. It exists only for you and him. A safe haven in the chaos, a bit of respite at the end of long years.

In his arms, you’re not his dead daughter’s best friend. He’s not the man that left you when you needed him most. You’re just two people that need to not be alone. Each time, it’s the same. The overwhelming bliss of Joel making love to you is second only to the understanding that he’s finally come back for you.

Thanks for reading! I'd love to hear from you. Comments and reblogs always appreciated.

#joel miller #tlou #joel miller fic #bfd!joel miller #jackson!joel miller #pedro pascal #pedro pascal character fic

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cinellieroll · 18 days ago

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☆ more random obey me headcanons !

characters: the demon brothers! <3

small note: i am back. and i will disappear once more after this..also i apologize for the VERYYY LATE upload. i am not dead and i wont die until om fandom comes back to life i tell ya 😤😤

cw: none! :p

☆ lucifer:

- occasionaly has thoughts of getting a german shepherd but cerberus would get EXTREMELY PISSED if he did. also another reason why he refuses to let satan keep cats in the house. cerberus will gobble them up in less than a millisecond.

- has a pretty high libido (as if it isn't already obvious in the game..) he really enjoys taking out his stress on you everytime he gets the chance. buckle up buttercup ༎ຶ⁠‿⁠༎ຶ

- one if his biggest secrets is keeping like a few albums of him and his brothers back when they still lived in the celestial realm. he keeps em hidden realll good

- sometimes asks levi or mammon to help him with his D.D.D

- "mammon, help me with this." "levi, why is my screen stuck like this?" "lucifer you paused the video-"

- he likes silk pajamas :3 he also can't STAND sweatpants for some reason.

- once a week, he dedicates atleast an hour or two grooming his own wings and his horns. there's a lot of occasions where he transforms in his demon form for parties and such.

- reads newspaper while taking a shit. guys dont argue with me on this its real.

- he has cold lips but his kisses are always very passionate with you!

- very well mannered everytime he's on the dining table and eating. y'all will never catch him spill a single food on the table or his clothes.

☆ mammon:

- eats with his hands sometimes when he's alone. and if someone ever finds out his excuse is always "so what? sometimes eating food with your hands is a better way to savor the taste." and i completely agree with him

- cleans his jewelry a lot. he wants them dazzling that people will do a double take when they see his mega awesome drip. like "haha yeah yall cant beat me on this baby" type shit

- cooks the BEST beef curry. the level of spice is perfect-o and beel always pesters him to make it.

- during family photos, he's always the one doing silly poses. he does hand stands, he has his ass out on display, he's ON THE FLOOR

- always man spreading in class. like you can literally see him chewing on his pen from across the room with his legs sprawled out

- you know that empty feeling you get after watching a movie? double that and give it to mammon. man takes it HARD especially if it was a sad movie that he watched. he'll feel empty for a gooooddd while

- always breaks his earphones, so when d.d.d airpods came out he got really happy and bought like 6 pairs (he ended up breaking all of them too)

- blasts music like crazy when he works out and lucifer absolutely HATES his music style and thinks it's unsanitary and inappropriate. like ok whatever you old fucking hag

- doesn't close the bathroom door after he uses it LIKE BITCH CLOSE THAT SHIT RN

- follows all of his fan accounts on devilgram ugh my boy <33

☆ leviathan:

- there's just like random times where he'll suddenly remember all of his past cringe phases. and it like appears on the most random times it's actually pissing him off

- always fantasized about creating character designs for simeon ever since he found out he was the creator of TSL

- he has a bad habit of HOLDING IN HIS PISS. yes he holds them in. he developed this habit ever since he got addicted to gaming. luckily for him he's a demon but boy if he was human he would've gotten kidney problems by now.

- levi would never ever admit it but he enjoyed getting spun around by mammon when they were still kids. like mammon grabs his arms then just spins him around and stuff

- sleeps with his headphones on and now he can't sleep without it. he's just like me jujujuju

- he really likes alex g :3

- sometimes he wishes he was a magical pop star girl performing for people on stage because they always look so happy when he watches them

- loves being the little spoon so much. sometimes it's awkward with him when he's the big spoon because he's either trembling or really stiff like a log

- he enjoys kissing your cheeks the most because he's convinced he'll melt if he tries kissing you on the lips

- has a hidden album on his phone of stolen shots of you doing the most random shit ever. eating, sleeping, showering..💀

☆ satan:

- even when it's freezing cold, his feet are always peeking out of his blanket. can't sleep without his bare feet hanging out.

- doesn't need reading glasses but insists on buying them because he thinks it fits the detective aesthetic. unfortunately he loses them a lot and no one knows why

- besides lucifer, satan is very sleek and neat when putting on neck ties

- had a phase where he absolutely despised coffee and tea because he found out lucifer enjoyed it. deep down he knew he enjoyed them too and it'd be one of the reasons for his constant rampages..

- started enjoying lofi music ever since levi introduced him to it.

- out of all the brothers, satan feels the most comfortable crying in front of mammon the most. (can i get some big brother mammon appreciation out here? 😔)

- he's the type to practice his lines in front of the mirror before asking you out on the date! he just wants everything to be perfect for you and yes sometimes he messes up but it's your fault for being too pretty

- worked as a librarian once as a part time job and lemme tell you..sales went high as fuck after that and the manager even BEGGED him to stay for longer. (which he did, as long as he got to have free books :p)

- tried the "which of the seven brothers are you?" quiz and got lucifer.

- is very skilled with the piano and even made a few pieces that reminded him of you <3

☆ asmodeus:

- really enjoys ear piercings and even got one himself!

- owns a clothing brand in the human world and even tried making you the co-owner. it's a really big success and he uses the money to buy you gifts

- can't go a day without kissing you atleast once! he feels like his lips would dry if doesn't get to even leave a peck on you

- does that back arch thing in his room when he's bored 👀

- bought so many makeup products once to the point lucifer banned makeup in HOL for like a month 💀 asmo held a grudge for a while because he was lowkey kinda conscious of his appearance when he'd go outside. especially when he's in front of you! ;((

- second most followed user on devilgram! (top one is diavolo lol)

- if he had to choose a favorite makeup brand from the human world it's either the ones with the cute packaging (ex: flower knows, too faced) or the high end brands like dior

- changes bed sheets like twice a week because it's either he can't stand the feeling anymore or found a new inspo on devilgram

- says he's not easily influenced on buying new things like mammon or levi but the moment he sees something go viral he's already purchasing 10 of them. (and posts it on his feed to gain those likes)

- crop dusts every now and then

☆ beelzebub:

- finds those gross ass thirst trappers who sexualizes food nasty asf and is a big donutdaddy hater

- wins awards from eating competitions a lot and always ALWAYS spoils you and belphie first

- always the viewer in situations where one of the brothers fight w eachother. mans always there for some reason so lucifer always approaches him first when smth happens lol

- sometimes he goes overboard with body sprays

- he likes hand made accessories/jewelry. belphie was the one who made his choker on his everyday outfit and cherishes it everyday

- he thinks tongue piercings are cool but never went out of his way to get one

- buys burger merch or any food merch in general lol

- he was never really the type to care about his own appearance and only did the bare minimum to make himself look presentable. but sometimes he does feel insecure when people get too intimidated by him, especially when it's you.

- "mc, you're not afraid of me right? i won't hurt you. i promise"

- majority of the time he's the one who fixes belphie's bed and cleans his side of the room so lucifer won't get mad at him

☆ belphegor:

- has no shame in stealing pillows from furniture shops and always gets away with it

- unintentionally says the most sassy remarks ever and stares at you when you call him out for it

- being the youngest, he doesn't really need to go shopping for his own necessities because one of the brothers already buys it for him before he can even step out of the house

- when you'd go back to the human world, he'd always gaze up at the stars and wonder how you're doing and if you're getting enough sleep

- always constipated like idk he just seems like the type to only shit once a week lmfao

- one time (or two..or three) he accidentally used a different toothbrush that belonged to one of the brothers because he was half asleep

- hates the feeling of jewelry on him because he thinks it's just in the way. especially hates earrings because it's a nuisance when he sleeps.

- HORRIBLE driver and can't drive for shit. crashed mammon's car once because he fell asleep. and his in defense was because traffic was so long smh

- he can't live without his cardigans. always wears long sleeved shirts unless it's summer season in the devildom and settles for loose shirts. he also has a habit of pulling his sleeves that it nearly covers his whole hand

- very calming singing voice. back when he was still in the celestial realm, a bunch of angel kids would approach him at night, telling him to sing lullabies for them to help them sleep <3

note: had to repost :P ALSO TY FOR 73 FOLLOWERS! hiphiphorey

#obey me #obey me shall we date #om! swd #obey me headcanons #leviathan obey me #obey me crack #om! leviathan #obey me lucifer #om! lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #beelzebub obey me #belphegor obey me #om! satan #om! belphegor #om! beelzebub #om! asmodeus #obey me nightbringer

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ryebread0605 · 6 months ago

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Hello, if it's not a bother I would like to ask Jamil Viper with a reader like Gigi Grant, a genie who appeared in the movie 13 Monster Wishes (Monster High)

This is such a fun ask as someone who adored monster high growing up! No specification was given so I’m gonna do a mix of both smut and fluff!

When he was sorting through the treasury, making sure nothing was stolen by some of the more sneaky dorm members, Jamil’s eyes fell upon something that made his eyes widen. A golden lamp, just like the ones in the stories of the sorcerer of the sands. It had intricate swirling details and diamonds encrusted in floral designs. Checking to make sure no one was around, he picked it up slowly and carefully. Sure, he had heard the stories of the genie growing up, but he simply thought it to be a way to downplay the insane power the sorcerer of the sands held. So, without thinking anything of it, he rubbed away a dirt spot on the lamp.

He nearly dropped it in shock as what looked to be a spirit emerged, dressed in dark red silks and adorned with golden jewelry. Your voice sounded like that of a sirens, luring him in as you spoke the words he had only heard of in legends,

“Thank you for awakening me, master. How may I be of service to you?” The way you approached him reminded him of how he would approach Kalim, he had never expected to someday be in the position where someone else was his servant. Sure, he had long dreamed of it, but he never once imagined it would be anything more than a silly dream.

“Sevens I’m going crazy, im hallucinating…” he just couldn’t believe this was real, although he lifted his head to the sound of your soft laughter. With a smile, you approached closer and gently took his hand in yours, looking up at him with the warmth and comfort he had never experienced before. And just like that, he understood for once what it felt like to have someone care about him.

The first few days of having you around were… interesting… to say the least. He was still very hesitant to ask anything of you, especially anything that had to do with Kalim, but slowly overtime opened up more and more. It started small, just him asking to help him carry the clean clothes to Kalim’s room or to help sweep the lounge floors. It felt… nice. Having someone else help him made the chores more bearable and the chats you would have during them sometimes even made him smile.

When he asked you for the first time to hug him, he was shocked by how gentle and loving it was. Not restrictive like Floyd’s or overpowering like Kalim’s, just soft and comforting. Almost like you wanted to make sure he could pull away if he wanted. But why would he want to, when it felt so natural and so right to be in your arms. That was the day he discovered how truly touch starved he was and how much your touch in particular made him feel safe. He still felt bad asking you for things, but your reassurance that your purpose was to answer to him made him feel slightly better.

(NSFW begins here please do NOT continue if you are a minor!)

As the days turned to months, he began to have a different kind of want for you. He noticed himself staring more as you did tasks and blushing anytime you smiled at him or hugged him. It took him talking to Ace of all people after a basketball game to figure out what was happening.

He was in love.

He knew he couldn’t ever actually confess to you, but maybe he could find something else. And so, he called you into his room one night to ask you for a favor.

“You wish.. for me to do that? Are you sure master?” Your voice wasn’t one of hesitation despite your words, instead one of wanting to make sure you were hearing him correctly.

“Sevens it’s hard enough for me to even ask this.. p-please don’t make me ask again..” he covered his flushed face with one hand but quickly widened his eyes as he felt your hands on his belt.

“Very well master, I hope I can please you well.”

He had his hand over his mouth desperate to muffle his moans as the other hand gripped his bedsheets, eyes shut in pleasure as your head bobbed up and down on his cock. Your tongue swirled along the rosewood coloured tip as saliva rolled down your chin. Looking up at him, your eyes locked with his brown ones before he gripped the back of your head and forced his cock down your throat, thick strings of cum flowing from his dick as he let out a muffled moan. Pulling your lips off with a pop, you licked your lips with a smile.

“I hope I did well, master. Maybe I can please you other ways sometime”

#disney twst #twst x reader #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x male reader #twisted wonderland smut #twst smut #twisted wonderland x fem reader #twst fluff #twst jamil #jamil viper

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winniefrezcomics · 1 month ago

Text

Anonymous asked: When did Perry realize he was trans? Also are his parents also trans or non-binary or anyother gender identity? ♡

All three of them are trans, actually! Carlo strikes me as a person who went thru the lesbian-to-nonbinary-to-transgender pipeline, but I think Wendy knew she wanted to be treated like her twin sister was from a fairly early age, so transitioned much sooner than her husband. (Mama cosma’s disapproval also forced Carlo to socially transition in secret, and he wasn’t able to begin PHYSICALLY transitioning until turning 18 and moving out)

Here’s a comic that hurt tf outta my feelings to sketch lmao- (in a good way)

“orgin story” and more doodles below the cut!

(MILD cw for misgendering and a mama cosma appearance 😷)

As for HOW Perry discovered he was NOT in fact, a little girl, and rather a little boy?

Timmy noticed first, actually!! Though his adopted parents didn’t go out of their way to mention to their son that they were both transgender, a young Timmy eventually noticed them doing thier hormone shots, and Carlo and Wendy had to assure him that they were both okay, they just needed to take thier “mommy and daddy medication” sometimes. As Timmy got older, he noticed other things that made his parents unique, and they would explain anything he asked them, so by the time Poof was born, Ten-year-old Timmy had a pretty solid understanding of what it MEANT to be “transgender”. This understanding is part of the reason he wished on a star for a baby brother- he knew it MIGHT be possible for his parents to have a bio child as well, but also knew thier unique biology might make it difficult

(Sidenote: if ur parents still let u think babies were delivered by the stork or something by TEN, my condolences brother ☠️)

ANYWAY- from the MOMENT his baby sibling was born, Timmy and Poof were INSEPARABLE, with Timmy wanting to help with the baby in any way he could, as often as possible. His parents certainly appreciated the help, and baby Poof was never hurting for love or attention 💕

As Poof grew, his parents encouraged him to play with whatever toys he liked best, and do whatever he wanted, but USUALLY what Poof wanted to do was “whatever his big brother was doing”. From video games to comic books, poof was always incredibly interested in whatever Timmy was interested in, and his brother was more than happy to read the pages out loud, or give him a controller to smack around (usually unplugged lmao, regular older brother shi)

Even when Poof was a toddler, Timmy would occasionally notice things that didn’t quite sit right with him- stuff like poof getting upset when Wendy would tell Timmy his was playing too rough with his sister (despite how much poof LOVED being chucked into soft objects or wrestled), or how much poof seemed to enjoy being called things like “little dude”- but I think it was a visit to Grandmas house when Perry was 7 that finally made him ask the big question- (Drabble below this comic that legit makes me a lil nauseous to look at and I considered not including 🙃)

DRABBLE START

Timmy goes outside to thier front porch, to find poof already sitting on the steps, having clearly retreated from the Christmas party inside. Timmy sits with him and they chat for a while, before Timmy finally goes out on a limb and asks-

“Hey P- random question but- do you ever like, wonder what it would be like if you were a boy?”

Poof shrugs, simply responding “well yeah, everybody thinks about that….”

Timmys nose scrunches, as his hunch starts seeming more plausible

“Bud… I’ve like, never thought about that. even once.”

“Of course not, you already ARE a boy!” Poof pouts

Timmy sighs, clarifying- “no no, like- I’ve never really wondered what it would be like to be a GIRL- eveb when I once dressed like one to hang out with my crush!” He added with a laugh, but Poofs frown only deepened-

“Hmf! Why WOULD you? Being a girl STINKS.”

And with that, Timmy had his answer-

“Ah. Yeeeahhh, thought ya might feel that way… c’mon lil dude- I think we should ah- talk to mom and dad.”

Timmy scooped his younger sibling into his arms, but poof looked up at him with confusion

“Did I say something wrong?”

“Nah, Poofy- I just, uh- think they’ll be able to explain better…”

By Eight years old Perry had fully socially transitioned, coming out at his eighth birthday party, with his parents even getting his name legally changed as a ninth birthday present 💜 ;w;

Making yall look at this doodle again bc it’s relevant lmao- Perry’s aunts and uncles all adore thier little nephew, and couldn’t be happier to see him living as his truest self 💕

#fairly normal parents au #fop au #fairly oddparents #drabbles #timmy turner #fop poof #human AU

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cup1dt3a · 2 years ago

Note

Do you still accept requests?

How would it be if the human reader has a little brother or sister who watches Wally's show, and well the reader like a good big brother the reader takes care of them and watches along with them, well what if Yandere wally falls in love with the reader, what would happen?

Tysm for the request this is the first one I’ve ever had for a story! And ofc! My request are always open unless stated otherwise. Also I mainly just do gender neutral!readers so the reader will be gender neutral!

” It’s starting! It’s starting! It’s starting! Come on you slow poke!”

“ Ow! Ok ok! Geez how you so strong for a seven year old?”

You muttered as your younger sister tugged you towards the Tv. Eyes gleaming with pure enchantment as the cheesy theme song of the puppet show they loved to watch. You being the good older sibling you were would watch it with them since your parents were too busy most of the time to watch the show with her.

“ Eeeeee! Look it’s Wally!” You cheered as the colorful puppet appeared on the screen.

“ Yup they’re your favorite huh?” You asked them with a chuckle to how excited they got.

“ Of course they paint very well and they look so cool!” They exclaimed while the puppets talked away.

As the show went on you just watched away with your little sibling. Sure it was just another little kids show but you had to admit the character designs were just so well done and amazing.

“Now what should I paint today?” Wally asked on the big screen looking towards the audience.

“ A rainbow rose!” They jumped.

“ A DANCING BLUE FLAMINGO!” You shouted just to mess with them seeing them angrily huff.

“ As if he’d paint that. Wally is so much more mature than that!” They crossed their arms as you giggled.

“ What an excellent decision! A dancing blue flamingo!” He cheered.

Your sibling ate their words with a pitiful glare as they looked up at you sticking your tongue out at them. You both watched the episode making a few jokes here and there to upset them. It was all fun in games for you two. It’s not really like your parents were ever around either. Sure it sucked but at least you weren’t alone as much as you wished but fuck it they’re fun to be around so why not.

You had put your little sister to bed a while ago. At least 2 hours ago and decided it was time to check on them due to their nightmares they have. As you went to their room you had heart their voice outside the room along with another’s voice it sounded familiar but you knew it wasn’t one of your parents. As you hurriedly walked over to where you heard the voices your heart beat fast. Rushing as faster than you ran to check on who the hell was talking to your seven year old sister.

“ Yeah! _____ loves that too!” You happily said as you turned to corner in a panic.

“ Mhm! You’re so helpful little one but I think it’s off to bed with you now. Go on sweet dreams little dreamer.” Wally said on the big screen with a smile and tilt to his head.

“ Oh geez. What are you doing up watching TV?” You sighed in relief.

“ Wally wanted to talk with me. And I didn’t want to be rude!” They replied looking up at you while you took them to bed holding their small hand.

“ Ok but next time Wally wants to “talk” with you tell him ____ said no.” You told them playing into their little fantasy.

“ Fine…Can you watch Welcome Home with me tomorrow still?” They sad with puppy dog eyes.

“ Yes yes. How about after work we go have a little sleep over in my room sound good?” You asked as they nodded with excitement.

As you went back into the living room you had noticed the TV was still on with Wally staring at you. Well it looked that way but as he silently stared you hadn’t noticed how much larger his smile got before you shut it off with a big yawn.

You had been having to take your younger sibling to work with you. It’s not like you wanted to but it’s not like you had a choice either. Because your parents were never home and your sister was to you get to be alone either way. Plus your boss was ok with it since they would bring their own kid to work. They would play together with each other a lot and we’re friends so it was a win win either way.

“ You having fun with charley?” You asked as they nodded playing with the other’s action figures.

It was getting late so you had to remind them to start wrapping things up. They sadly agreed upset it was the end of your shift before they remembered about your sleep over with them. They had said their goodbyes and hugged any other friends they had before you had left. They had skipped as they held your hand back to the apartment. You then came upon a display case of old TV’s they all displayed Wally.

“ Look! Loook! It’s Wally he’s waving at us! Hiiii Wally!” They jumped with glee waving at the puppet on screen.

Indulging your younger sister you also waved greeting the puppet before walking away with your younger sibling. Not noticing the out of order signs or the way the puppet had followed you both with its head.

” Sleep Over! Sleep Over! SLEEP OVER!” They chanted as you popped the popcorn and got a few apples for them too.

You both went back to your room rolling your eyes as they dashed over towards your room. You also has a TV in there to watch your own shows other than Welcome Home. Such as more horror shows and adult shows because you didn’t want to accidentally influence them with inappropriate things or have to answer the embarrassing questions of theirs.

“ So let me guess Welcome Home?” You guessed without a doubt as they exclaimed a gleeful yes.

You then set the Tv up to play the show as they started to munch on some popcorn. She then started to try and aim it at your mouth every time missing but you still encouraged them to keep trying until one lucky shot they finally got it in your mouth.

“ Wooo! I did it!” The cheered bounced up and down.

“ Good job little dreamer!” Wally clapped on point as if he was congratulating your sister with you.

“ Thanks Wally it was so cool right?” They asked expecting an answer.

“Oh why it was very cool! You think you can do it again?” He asked with a tilt to his head.

You sat there in concern as the two talked observing as they spoke to each other.

“ How are you doing that?” You asked them with a slight shake to your voice.

“ Doing what…Omg you’re so dumb just talk to him like any other person ____! ____ can be so dumb sometimes right Wally?” They asked looking over to the puppet.

“ Now that wasn’t nice? You should apologize to ____ they must feel very sad now.” He told the small child.

They hurriedly apologize just as the puppet asked. He was a puppet. He couldn’t have known your name. Your little sister isn’t smart enough to even think of a prank like this. They’ve been doing this. This has been going on for weeks! Finding them in front of the TV talking to the puppet with glee.

“ ____? You ok?” She asked you tugging on your sleeve with concern for your silence.

“ Yes, Yes I’m fine…So wally how long have you two been talking.” You asked in disbelief still pale.

“ I think the second day you both watched the show! You’re such a good sibling always going on with the little dreamers antics you almost make me envy you with how cute of a sister you have.” They replied.

That’s not part of any script. This wasn’t normal!

“ Yeah! Wally would ask me to go and talk to him about you!” they said with a smile on your face while yours remained pale.

“ Yes I couldn’t help myself and they always sneaked up late at night for a snack and mischievous little thing they are started to just talk to me. I couldn’t help but ask about you. Always so hard working and kind to the little one.” You dreamily sighed.

“ Uh huh.” You said.

You felt sick. How could you not have noticed this!? How did you let this slide for months? Are you that neglectful? God you’re almost as bad as your parents! Your little sibling has been talking with some puppet who sounds obsessed with you as they go on and on about how perfect you are. You had noticed your sister start to yawn cuddling up on the bed. You took her to her room as soon as she passed out wanting to have your own conversation with the puppet. As you came back there he stood int the dark screen with that sinister smile peering into your soul.

“ What exactly have you been asking of my little sister?” You asked him with a slight grit to your teeth.

“ Just about you. Your likes, interests, hobbies, insecurities…. Everything about you really!” He stated.

“ Why though?” You asked feeling insane for doing this.

“ Because you’re all I can think about. All I ever dream about! All I ever want. Just look at yourself. So perfect so free like a song bird.” He sighed looking as if he was drooling.

“ You’re just so perfect. I love and want everything to do with….Why are you trying to turn the TV off?” He pouted with a tilt as you tried to turn your Tv off.

“ No No! My sweet dreamer you’re finally acknowledging me! I won’t let you stop now! We’ll be together forever! Just me you and your sister!” He gasped getting closer to the Tv.

“ YOU CANT LEAVE ME! I LOVE YOU! I LIVE FOR YOU! I BREATHE FOR YOU! YOU CANT LEAVE ME NOT AGAIN!” He cried out smooshing his face to the TV.

The screen then constantly displayed love me on it over and over again while the puppets eyes shook. “ Please love me! I need you!!I promise I won’t harm them at all just please keep listening to me! I need you!” He yelled banging onto the screen.

You had no idea what to do or to listen to him as he constantly cried out of any ounce of your attention. Almost like a touch starved animal.

“You…promise?” You asked as he nodded smile growling bigger by the second. What have you done?

Tysm again for the request they are open! Hope you’re all having a good day/night or that it gets better!

Part 2 ( Enjoy<333)

Sincerely- Cup1dT3A💌

#wally darling #welcome home #yandere wally darling #welcome home wally #wally darling x reader #welcome home x reader

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wildandsmile · 1 year ago

Text

࿇ ✥ ࿇ Worlds Apart ࿇ ✥ ࿇

Summary: Your father serves as the coach for the Manshine football/soccer team, and in your role as the dutiful daughter, you make a point to visit him regularly. However, each time you stop by, one of the star players seems to have a penchant for flirting with you.

Word Count: 4.2k

TW: Age gap (Reo 22 and Readers 29) by the way cannon Reo likes older women so.

Kinks: Fingering, Degrading, Cream-pie, Praising, Sir Name, Squirting, Exhibition, Sub Reader, Dom Reo, unprotected sex, penetrative sex (p in v), humiliation, Choking and Rough sex.

Enjoy!

A couple of years had passed since Reo's departure from Blue Lock. His journey took him to the semi-finals, where he was eventually eliminated by Bachira. However, Ego recognized the immense talent Reo possessed and believed it shouldn't be squandered. As a result, he allowed Reo to continue pursuing his striking career. Shortly thereafter, your father, a renowned co-coach in England, teamed up with Chris Prince. They wasted no time in recruiting Reo, having already witnessed his potential while he was a starter for their team, Manshine City, during his time at Blue Lock.

And thus, you encounter the ostentatious wealthy young man who always seems to have a girl by his side. Each day, you would pay a visit to your father, given his advancing age, ensuring his well-being. However, occasionally, you extended your stay to assist the boys with their routines or offer them water after their practice games.

Whenever you approached Reo, though, he would indulge in playful flirting, charmingly remarking, "I'll treat you good if you give me the opportunity." This, understandably, ignited your father's anger, prompting him to punish Reo with rounds of field laps, much to the amusement of onlookers.

"Hey, dad, how has your day been?" you inquire, planting a gentle kiss on his cheek. He turns toward you, a broad smile gracing his lips, and replies, "I've had a good day, dear. By the way, I know you just arrived, but could you fetch some water for the boys?" You offer a swift nod before making your way to the supply room, retrieving the water jug, and returning just in the nick of time.

"Once again, you grace us with your presence, princess," he remarks, deftly taking the cup of water from your hand and punctuating the gesture with a subtle wink. You roll your eyes and swiftly retort, "You're well aware I'm here for my dad, Reo." Yet, true to form, it's as if every word you utter that he doesn't wish to acknowledge simply passes through one ear and exits the other. "We both understand that it's just a self-assurance you cling to, convincing yourself it's all about watching me play, princess," he asserts, using his shirt to mop away perspiration and inadvertently unveiling his well-defined six-pack in the process. In exasperation, you throw your hands up and walk away, prompting Reo to trail closely in your wake.

"And what's your desire now, Reo?" you inquire, quickening your pace in an attempt to create distance between yourself and the purple-haired man. As anticipated, he manages to intercept by firmly grasping your wrist. "Well, give me a moment," Reo pleads with puppy-dog eyes, managing to melt your resistance just a tad. Succumbing to his persistence, you let out a hurried yet slightly curt, "What is it, Reo?" He disregards your brusqueness and proceeds, "I just wanted to extend an invitation to you for the upcoming victory celebration our team plans to host." With that, you come to a complete halt, pivoting to face Reo, your arms crossed and an eyebrow skeptically raised.

"You're talking as though victory is already in the bag," you retort with a sassy undertone, the effect of which sends a subtle shiver down Reo's spine, unbeknownst to you. He relishes witnessing your pouty demeanor, the way you appear and speak when you're irritated entices him even more. Yet, he finds himself engaged in this playful cat-and-mouse dynamic and is content to indulge it for a little while longer.

"Oh, come now, you don't truly believe we're destined to lose, do you, princess?" he chimes in, grasping your hand and gently massaging your knuckles. Eager to respond, you start, "Well, I don't think your team will..." Your sentence is abruptly truncated as Reo claps his hands together, interjecting, "Well then, if that's the sentiment, I'm eagerly anticipating your presence at the party." You're about to interject and voice your hesitation, but before you can, he departs, leaving you alone with your contemplations.

Before long, the anticipated game day arrives. Just as you had predicted, Reo and his team effortlessly overpower the opposing side, amassing such a significant lead that the match concludes ahead of schedule. As the dust settles, your father rushes onto the field, orchestrating a heartfelt group embrace with the team. Glancing towards them, a grin stretches across your face as their jubilant cheers and chants fill the air.

As the post-game festivities wind down, your attention shifts to Reo, who approaches with an infectious grin. You're well aware that his next words are bound to carry a hint of arrogance. "You see, princess, I told you victory was ours," he declares, his face beaded with sweat. You couldn't deny the charm in his triumphant expression, but you're determined not to inflate his already sizable ego. Nonchalantly, you retort, "Indeed, you did make that prediction," your tone carrying a playful undertone that downplays your enthusiasm for their impressive win.

"Since victory is ours, it seems only fitting that you accompany me to the after-party," Reo proposes, leaning against the fence and casting you pleading puppy-dog eyes. In response, you playfully place a finger on his lips, your expression softening into an adorable aw-struck gaze. "Um, no," you reply, relishing the playful moment. Ignoring your refusal, Reo persists, now puffing his lips in a childlike pout, his puppy-dog eyes unwavering. The charming standoff continues until your resolve finally crumbles.

"Alright, alright, I'll go, but on one condition: you must score 10 goals in your next match," you challenge. As your words sink in, you witness a transformation in Reo. His eyes widen with a newfound determination, as if flames of passion burn within him. "Really?" he exclaims, a smile that illuminates your very soul gracing his lips. Affirming your wager with a subtle nod, Reo bolts over to your father, urgently requesting gym access to train late into the night. Observing his earnest efforts for your attention, you can't help but find his determination endearing, knowing that you hold the power to grant him his desire.

True to form, like a well-oiled machine, the much-anticipated match unfolded according to schedule. Recognizing the gravity of the occasion, you chose to sit beside your father and Chris Prince, demonstrating unwavering team spirit. The boys poured their hearts into the game, and everything was proceeding splendidly. However, when your gaze fixed on Reo as he maneuvered down the opposite side of the field to wrest control of the ball from the opposing team, you couldn't resist turning to your father with a question.

"Dad, how many goals has Reo scored so far?" Despite the initial reproachful glance, your father set aside his reservations and provided the answer. "He's netted 9 so far," he informed you. Upon hearing those words, your heart sank momentarily as your attention remained fixed on Reo, who was advancing toward the rival goal. While you harbored a certainty that he would successfully score that goal, a flicker of hope kindled within you—a hope that he might not, considering their substantial lead. After all, the opposing team was already significantly behind, making a single goal seem inconsequential.

Your hopes were nearly extinguished when you witnessed Reo clinch the game's final goal, marking his remarkable 10th score. As the team rallied around him, playfully tousling his violet hair and lifting him into the air in jubilation, your fleeting optimism faded. However, your spirits were soon lifted when the entire group approached you and your father. They expressed their gratitude to him for his unwavering training efforts and extended their appreciation to you for ensuring his availability to guide them.

A comforting warmth enveloped you, as you realized the tangible impact of your involvement in the team's journey. Sharing a sincere smile and offering a gracious acknowledgment, you watched as they headed towards the locker room. Yet, a moment before they disappeared, Reo silently mouthed, "Wait for me." Though fully aware of his intentions, you remained seated, patiently awaiting his return. After approximately half an hour, Reo emerged once again. With an exuberant grin, he sprinted towards you, sweeping you up into his arms. Beaming at you, he exclaimed, "Did you catch my performance out there, princess? Wasn't I utterly astonishing?"

"Absolutely, Reo," you reply, struggling to stifle your laughter, feeling as though you're witnessing a child eagerly showing off a newfound skill to their mother. However, the lighthearted moment is swiftly replaced when the purple-haired young man inquires, "So, are you still planning on attending the party tonight?" You hesitate for a brief moment, then tap his chest gently as a signal for him to put you down.

He responds accordingly, lowering you to the ground. As he sets you down, his facial expression undergoes a shift, prompting you to offer your explanation. "Well, Reo, I was actually thinking I might not—" But before you can finish your sentence, Reo interjects assertively, "There's no backing out now, princess. We made our little wager, and I won fair and square. I'll see you at 8, okay?" You attempt to voice your thoughts, but before you can formulate a complete response, he's already striding away, the distance between you growing too great to carry on the conversation.

With determination, you headed home, fully aware that escaping the party was out of the question. Once inside, you ventured into the depths of your closet, selecting a variety of outfits. However, after an hour of fruitless searching, you resorted to FaceTiming your best friend for outfit advice. After a barrage of reactions ranging from outright rejections to tentative approvals, the two of you finally settled on a chic velvet two-piece ensemble.

Following your decision, you dedicated time to meticulously curling your hair, and then you settled in front of your mirror to carefully apply your makeup. Just as you were about to apply the finishing touch of lip gloss to complete the look, a knock echoed through your door. Swiftly, you hurried over, deftly applying the lip gloss in the process. Unsurprisingly, upon opening the door, you were met with the sight of Reo, elegantly clad in a black suit. His coat was artfully left open, revealing a crisp white button-up shirt that wasn't fully buttoned, offering a tantalizing glimpse of his bare chest.

Raising your hand in a gesture for Reo to wait by the door, you notice his understanding nod before you hurry back to your room. With swift precision, you retrieve your wallet, select a pair of shoes, and gather some safety essentials. Returning downstairs, you subtly showcase your outfit to Reo, a sly hint that you're dressing up for the occasion, although you'd never admit to it. Your actions are a playful payback for the teasing he's subjected you to. As you reach for the door to lock it, you cast a wink his way, a subtle acknowledgment of your little game.

Soon enough, you find yourself seated in Reo's car, gazing at the city lights as they blur by. The enchanting view momentarily captures your attention, until Reo's hand gently rests on your thigh, drawing you back to reality. In response, you subtly adjust your leg, granting him slightly more access to your thigh. However, as his touch ventures further, radiating warmth, you swiftly slap his hand away, a playful yet assertive reminder of your boundaries.

"You're quite the teasing expert, princess," Reo remarks, his hand resuming its place on the gearstick. The journey leads you to an upscale club adorned with Manshine Clubhouse signage.

Gazing at the vibrant-haired man, a perplexed expression crosses your face, prompting him to explain. "One of the guys saved up and invested a bunch of money into this place. With renovations and some significant investments, we ended up with the Manshine Clubhouse."

A nod from you acknowledges his preemptive response to an unspoken question—a characteristic of Reo that you appreciate. His uncanny ability to anticipate your thoughts and provide answers creates a unique connection between the two of you.

Lost in your thoughts, you're snapped back to reality as your date playfully tugs you into the club. The sights and sounds of dancing people envelop you, allowing you to soak in the atmosphere. Just as you're considering asking Reo to dance, a group of girls materializes, engulfing you in the crowd and temporarily interrupting your plans.

Understanding that trying to rejoin Reo might be a futile endeavor, you venture deeper into the club. Your eyes lock onto Nagi's girlfriend amidst the crowd, her presence providing a semblance of comfort. Approaching her, you engage in a casual conversation, quickly establishing a rapport. As the conversation flows, you summon the courage to broach the topic of hitting the dance floor.

To your surprise, she readily agrees, and you both kick things off by sharing a shot before immersing yourselves in the dance floor frenzy. The music resonates, the ambiance is electric, and the night seems to come alive. Amidst the pulsating beats, you relish in the carefree joy of letting loose and having fun.

As the hours roll on, fatigue begins to take a toll on your legs, prompting you to express your need to take a break to your newfound companion. With the music blasting at full tilt, you manage to convey your intention to sit down, though you suspect she only caught the "sit" part, given the deafening noise.

You locate a comfortable seat and ease yourself into it, initially basking in the ambiance of the club. However, your tranquility is shattered by an onslaught of giggles from across the room. Turning your gaze, a disconcerting sight meets your eyes: Reo flanked by two girls, perched on his lap, their hands eagerly exploring his body. It's as though they're vying for his attention, throwing themselves at him shamelessly.

Strangely, an unfamiliar pang of irritation courses through you, fueled by the undeniable urge to be the one occupying that seat, engaging in those affectionate gestures, sharing kisses, and reveling in the private jokes that elicit his radiant smile. You can't deny the surge of happiness his expressions bring, yet beneath it lies a growing anger.

Watching him interact with those girls, his touch tracing their contours, as if he's committing their forms to memory, ignites a fire within you. As you observe, your frustration simmers. The disparity between your worlds becomes glaringly apparent. Reo embodies intelligence, affluence, and popularity, while you're simply a down-to-earth individual with a deep connection to your father. Doubts swirl in your mind, wondering if his professions of love are genuine or if he merely desires to toy with your affections.

However, the last straw snaps as you glance up at Reo and the girls once more. His gaze locks onto yours, as if penetrating the depths of your soul. In that moment, his lips move in a silent confession, "This could be you," just as one of the girls plants a deliberate kiss on his neck. Fueled by a surge of frustration, you seize your resolve, grabbing your belongings and marching to the exit. Dialing a ride, you step outside, the biting wind cutting through you, offering no reprieve from your emotions.

Your attention is drawn back when Reo emerges from the building, his eyes finding you amidst the darkness. With purpose, he strides toward you. "Why are you leaving, princess?" he queries, his expression a mix of bewilderment and something more sinister. It's as if he's an enigmatic force, fully aware that his actions are the driving force behind your departure, a realization that only fans the flames of his ego.

Determined not to give him the satisfaction, you respond, your words carrying an edge of bitterness. "I've had my fill of enjoyment for the night, and my feet are aching. But what about you? Aren't there two eager girls waiting for your attention?" The words drip with venom, a testament to your simmering anger.

"Well, well, well, seems you had your eyes on me, huh, princess?" Reo quips, a smug grin playing across his face. "And what if I was?" you retort, meeting his gaze with a hint of disdain, your gaze never faltering as you hold his gaze.

Unrelenting, Reo chooses to keep prodding, his determination evident. "Well, why didn't you come and join?" he challenges, further stoking the flames. It's in that moment that your attention zeroes in on the telltale lipstick marks adorning Reo's neck. As you count each visible kiss mark, a surge of anger courses through you, intensifying with each passing moment.

The mounting frustration propels you into motion, compelling you to walk away in a bid to regain your composure. Yet, as anticipated, Reo remains in pursuit, his words like arrows aimed at your vulnerabilities. "Aw, come on, princess, don't tell me a tinge of jealousy is creeping in," he goads, his words deliberately provocative. Ignoring him, you maintain your brisk pace, refusing to give him the satisfaction of acknowledging his jabs.

However, Reo's provocations continue undeterred. "If I didn't know better, I'd say you're developing feelings for me or something," he jests, a knowing glint in his eyes. Suddenly, his grip tightens around your arm, halting your movement despite your efforts to pull away. Struggling against his unyielding grasp, you attempt to break free, but his hold remains resolute, overpowering your struggles.

"Your silence speaks volumes, confirming my suspicion," Reo assets, stepping directly in your path. His words hit home, as they reveal a truth you've kept hidden—the fact that you've fallen for this self-assured, albeit aggravating, individual. You refuse to grant him the satisfaction of admitting your feelings, at least not yet.

Determined to evade his scrutiny, you avert your gaze, ensuring your expression remains concealed. However, your attempt is short-lived, as his hand lands on your cheek, compelling you to meet his gaze. "Oh, no, princess. You won't escape by turning away. You owe me an answer, a genuine one," Reo insists, his grip firm as he holds your gaze captive. He demands a direct response, his eyes betraying a swirling mix of emotions, the complexity of which you can't quite decipher.

Despite his persistence, you maintain your silence, unwilling to let your emotions become an open book. This stance, however, is beginning to test Reo's patience. He's accustomed to bending situations to his will, and the prolonged cat-and-mouse game is chipping away at his composure, gradually igniting a spark of frustration within him.“Well princess since you don’t want to answer me I guess I’ll just have to fuck the answer out of you and with that Reo drags you to a near by alley way.

Reo's lips curled into a seductive grin as his fingers danced along the contours of your quivering abdomen, tantalizingly inching closer to the delicate fabric that barely concealed your enticing curves. He eagerly tugged it lower, craving the sensation of his hand slipping beneath the soft velvet fabric. Your breath hitched as his fingers grazed your tantalizingly bare thighs, inching dangerously close to your aching core.

You gasped with anticipation as he boldly slid his hand beneath your delicate fabric, his fingertips caressing the slick contours of your aroused core. His head inched nearer to yours, his lips tantalizingly grazing against your earlobe, causing a delicious shiver to course through your body. The warmth of his breath, coupled with his intoxicating scent, enveloped you entirely, leaving you utterly captivated.

What do you mean, "don't want to turn you into a dumb slut just yet, princess?" He poked his finger inside your sticky cunt and laughed as he felt the tight grip of your walls on his finger.

You muttered, "Fuck," knowing that keeping your mouth shut was going to be difficult, but you were so attracted to him that you didn't want the moment to end. You were in dire need of him. You closed your eyes and murmured, "Fuck, Reo," once again.

When he started pushing it in and out of you, your breath got erratic and you started making low whimpers and groans. When Reo inserted his middle finger and sped up her speed, you tossed your head back in an instant because you wanted to hear more of the wonderful noises you made exclusively for him. And he was not the least bit dissatisfied. Once he got to the part that always made you roll your eyes back in your head, you started muttering her name under your breath.

“You’re making such a pretty mess princess , look at you” he spoke in a lower tone. The combination of his voice that sent shivers down your spine and the movements of skilled fingers caused a familiar knot to form in your stomach.

I enjoy how you stretch between my fingers. You take me so well," he gushed, his other hand raising your skirt fabric again for a better look at your cunt. He noticed that your secretions were soaking through his palm and pooling at your feet as they dropped from your thighs. He let out a whistle at the site, unable to contain his amusement.

You could hardly believe how drenched you were for him as you lowered your gaze to the spot where he met your body and moaned in horror. You knew Reo turned you on so badly, but witnessing your body respond to his touch was something else entirely.

The only sounds you made in the alley were the wet noises coming from your cunt as his big, thick fingers stretched it out. It was almost embarrassing how effortlessly his fingers slid into your cunt. And you would feel shame for it if you weren't being fucked out by him, but you didn't give a damn.

“I'm- I'm so close! Don't stop, please” you say to him as your nails dug into his shoulder blades and your eyes shut closed.

Reo whispered in your ear, "Cum for me, princess," as you finally sought your high, mouth agape and eyes closed. He didn't cease his moves on your body until you virtually begged him to stop, despite the fact that you were on the verge of passing out from the exertion.

Then, you squirt all over his hands and watch as he proudly watches your messed-up condition while pulling out his fingers and bringing them to his lips to suck them clean. You were too worn out to speak, so your face was red, your eyes were shiny, and your lips were bitten. Your dress was now only just covering your upper body, and your tits were practically bursting out from behind it.

After you had a moment to catch your breath, he lined up his cock with your now hypersensitive cunt and pushed his throbbing cock within, without giving you a chance to acclimate to his size before he began thrusting into your sloppy, wet cunt.

You started crying because the feeling of him within you was driving you mad. When Reo's left hand rubbed rough circles on your clit, he let out a series of low grunts. And his right found its way to your thirst, where it rested on your throat, making your breath heavier and your cunt tighten until you and Reo were both on the verge of cumming.

"You look fantastic in this position, like a filthy little cum slut who is just itching to be filled, but what you don’t get to cum. So feel free to cry on my cock while I decide if you can continue to breathe.

As your nails drove painfully into his wrist, you whimpered. You felt your dizziness returning slowly. When I tell you to, princess, you'll cum on my cock. While his lips were making contact with hers, he spoke. You could hear the strain in his voice, the quiet gasps.

“M’mm yes sir, promise not to cum until I’m told” you moan out with your fucked out expression which was only make Reo even more feral.

Reo repeats, "Good girl," before giving you a few more pointed thrusts. When he repeatedly lands on the sweet spot, a sound that can only be described as a scream rises up from deep within your chest. He let go of your neck a little while ago.

"Cum." The demand had barely reached your ears as your vision went white. You felt his hips stutter against your own, shooting his load in tandem with your own orgasm.

The sight of you struggling to get up with your legs spread wide and his cum leaking out of you into the chilly ground was an object of admiration as he slowly withdrew. He couldn't deny that seeing you there just increased his desire for you, but he forced himself to help you tidy up and enter your Uber, where he spoke softly.

“Once we get home, I’m going to fuck the shit out you real fucking good until you can’t say anything but my name~” you only nodded knowing that you were in for a long night.

#fanfic #fanfiction #smut #praise #x reader #anime smut #blue lock smut #bllk smut #reo mikage #reo smut #party au #club au #age g4p #angst #4k #anime

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kaymarie-bell · 10 months ago

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Diasomnia Spoilers, Chapter 8 (JP)

part 1

After Idia finishes his explanation of the plan, he makes our Magic Stones able to switch our clothes (like a character customization screen / magical girls lmfao) and we use Silver’s UM to start moving around. The first dream we see is Epel’s

Epel's dream:

In his dream, Epel has a buff body but the same face (also his steps sound like a giant walking lmfao.)

We go to talk to him, but he picks a fight with Sebek. In Epel’s dream he’s taller than both Sebek and Jack (😭). We have to convince him that this dream isn’t really what he wants in order to wake him up. He kinda loses it once we mention Vil.

We get blot clones of Vil and Rook that are trying to convince him to stay inside the dream, telling him how much Leona praises him as the best rookie in the magift team and how he embodies the strength and beauty of Pomefiore.

Grim snaps and reminds him of his wish to defeat Neige as the “poisoned apple” after the VDC.

Epel finally wakes up and accepts his true appearance. We fight against the fake Vil and Rook. Epel uses his UM to win. After that, Idia (in tablet form) explains the situation him.

Idia gives him the invitation he prepared, and we leave a fake copy of Epel’s body in the dream (the buff one 😭) to keep Malleus from finding out too soon.

We then move on to Rook’s dream:

Just as the new SSR showed: we are in a dream where Rook is still a Savanaclaw student. He is not a first year. He recognizes Epel and wonders if Leona asked to see him because of magift.

We try the “Vil would be mad if he saw you looking like that” strategy on Rook, however he doesn’t understand why it would concern him since Vil is an RSA student (‼️)

Vil is also Neige’s best friend (‼️‼️‼️)

Rook begins his fanboy rant about Vil and Neige’s “friendship.” He always imagined them as besties, and he keeps talking about their interviews and how they behave with each other. Sebek snaps at him and gets him to shut up for a bit, Rook is apologetic for getting too excited since he doesn’t have anyone to talk about this topic in Savanaclaw (😭)

Ortho wants us to go into Rook’s room to get more information about this version of him to wake him up. Rook tries to stop us but we manage to get inside.

His room is decorated floor to ceiling with Neige’s merch on the left and Vil’s on the right (😭😭😭😭)

Sebek voice: what kind of rituals are you performing here?

Rook has been keeping his room a secret for all of his three years at NRC. He says he can’t let us go now…without looking at his oshis’ DVD collection first (😭😭😭😭😭😭😭)

5 hours later. Everyone is tired, and Silver even fell asleep for the first time since we got stuck in these dreams.

Epel tries to make him remember the VDC, but in this Rook’s memory Neige sang Minna de Yahoo! alongside Vil. He tells us goodnight and we leave his room.

The group starts to wonder if this dream means that Rook would’ve preferred to not be friends with Vil, but Epel is against that idea. He thinks that Rook is still thinking about Vil’s overblot, and maybe he believes that if Vil and Neige weren’t rivals then Vil wouldn’t have gone through all that.

Our plan to make Rook wake up involves going to the Coliseum / VDC stage and sing Absolutely Beautiful (new rhythmic!)

We get a flashback of how we rehearsed the song. Epel guided us and assigned our places. Epel -> Vil / Ortho -> Jamil / Sebek -> Epel / Silver and Grim -> Adeuce combo / Yuu -> Kalim / Idia -> Audience and judge.

Idia is happy to take this role, since he is very strict about idol performances (😭) he also offered to get everything ready

Epel: ✨Really? Thank you, Idia-san! ✨

Idia: Ugh! It’s too dazzling! For a moment I thought I’d been reincarnated into an idol training game-

Idia: Pomefiore is frightening….

Idia: I mean, doesn’t this kinda make me a manager or a boys' idol group P?

Idia: “Idia Manager”….”Shroud P”…..Hah! It doesn’t sound too bad~

note: in the type of idol games Idia is talking about, the P stands for “Producer” (time to Ensemble our Stars)

Rook begins to wake up, but blot clones of Vil and Neige appear. They begin to sing Minna de Yahoo! and Rook gets distracted again. Epel starts to scream at him

Epel: Look closely! The real Vil-san looks more wicked, and his eyebrows are so angled! His eyes are so sharp that his stare will make your heart skip a beat!

Epel: Your Roi de Poison! Our Queen! He is far more Poisonous and Beautiful [than the fake]!

Rook: Poisonous…Beautiful…?

Epel: Don’t you dare give out the words Vil-san wanted the most that day to those fakes! You’re a worse traitor now than when you voted for the Royal Sword Academy! (ouch)

Epel: Come on, wake up! ROOK HUNTEEEER!

Rook: One vote for RSA…traitor…ugh!

Rook: Ugh!….that’s right…in this world…the most beautiful thing in this world is…ARGH!

Rook wakes up, but the fakes are still trying to distract him. ( shoutout to Vil’s VA, this Vil speaks in a more…princely? manner. Definitely not Our Vil)

Rook knows this is a dream, but he still feels guilty about pointing his arrow at them

(Groovy spoiler for Rook's new SSR)

Fake Vil voice: Neige get behind me!

✨MAGICAL GIRL TRANSFORMATION✨

We defeat the blot clones, and Rook and Epel have their reunion

Meanwhile Sebek and Idia:

Sebek: I can’t believe it…you’re not only making me fight, but also dance.

Idia: Hehe. I managed to get a good recording of the magnificent Sebek-shi waving his arms and feet in such a clumsy manner.

Sebek: You-! Turn that off! If you show this to anyone, I will not let you get away with it!

Rook notices Idia and is moved by him “guiding the underclassmen as a Dorm Leader” (😭)

Idia is like “eh? Not really…I’m more of a P or a manager…”

Rook asks him to explain what happened at Lilia’s farewell party. Idia shows him the video too. Rook joins our party, receives the invitation, and leaves a clone behind. We move onto the next dream.

#twisted wonderland #twst #twst jp #twst spoilers #diasomnia spoilers #diasomnia chapter #my translation #working on mobile so I ran out of image space for Vil’s dream #hopefully Rook can breathe easier now #let the boy move on from the VDC!

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aladaylessecondblog · 1 month ago

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The Whore AU - Voryn I

Author's Note: no nsft yet, but this girl getting collared.

-----------------------------------

To the chief of the False Gods,

Consider the yearly offering no longer necessary. The one last sent has proven to be more valuable than first expected.

Vivec sucked in a sharp breath. No. This was not happening. Further investigation of the whore's background had given more hints, hints he REALLY thought the Temple should have noticed when investigating her in the first place. The corprus infection and recovery should have been noticed. SOMEONE should have seen something!

He went on reading and ignored certain insults. What came next was more alarming anyway.

Lord Voryn Dagoth, Dagoth Ur, will offer you a six-month truce under one condition: Send Nerevar's bones, of which we are certain you are possessed, to Kogoruhn.

Vivec waited until he was sure he was alone and screamed. He didn't have these outbursts as a rule, because they didn't help solve the situation...but it was impossible not to. They'd handed the Nerevarine to Dagoth Ur, offered unknowingly that very thing which drove him to do all that he did.

And it had been a whore. A fucking WHORE. Someone who had no reason not to accept some sort of counter-offer, someone who had admitted to the Temple she wouldn't mind getting out of the life. Or perhaps Dagoth Ur was simply refusing to let her leave - either way the result was the same.

The Sharmat had Nerevar back, and they had no choice but to send him the bones. Six months - they could do a lot with six months of truce.

Vivec took a deep breath and started a letter he would later hand to an ordinator, regarding a certain hidden chamber in the Puzzle Canal.

-----------------------------

Nerevar, sweet Nerevar had returned, practically been handed to him on a sacrificial platter, and here he was completely unprepared for it! Perhaps the woman was, too--she seemed aware of what was going on, yet confused about what it meant. She obeyed the commands the same as Nerevar always had, with the same eagerness - there was an echo there, the presence he meant to swell in its appearance.

The ash creatures were going through the several boxes of things - things left from the First Era, that had been carefully preserved. A few random robes (he would take one of those, too), old relics of House Dagoth miraculously preserved through the end of the First and the entire Second Era, collected.

But until he reached into the box and pulled out that strip of leather with the brass buckle on it, he was not content.

"Nerevar has returned to us," he said, directing his words to the ash creatures standing and watching him, "And this will be celebrated appropriately - but tomorrow."

He looked at the strip of leather.

"Tonight I do not wish to be disturbed."

-----------------------------------

Sadara had no idea what was going on. She'd been kneeling for five minutes now and still Dagoth Ur hadn't returned. Perhaps this was part of his request...or his desire...he wanted to be waited on somehow. The roleplaying of being above her, even though he already was. Perhaps he meant to catch a worshiper at pray, sort of thing.

Just as she was thinking of getting back up, she heard footsteps and lowered her head.

"What is your name? Where have you lived?"

"Sadara," she said. "From Cyrodiil, but I lived in Ebonheart."

"Dragon-born, and far-star marked..." Dagoth Ur said it softly as he approached. "You have read the prophecies, I assume."

"No," she said, "People talk of them, but I've never read them. No point in it, considering..."

"As it turns out, there is every reason for you to have done so."

He stopped beside her.

"If I know who and what you are," he said, "It is no doubt that the Temple does as well. What have you told them?"

What was going on? Was this part of his little game? They'd discussed nothing as she'd done with the other brothers.

"I told one person I'd had corprus, but...I joked that I got better. And I turned down the potions of Cure Disease they offered me," she said, still not looking up.

"So they will know." There was a pause as he crouched beside her.

She shivered.

"What I want," he said, "Is what I had with Nerevar. You comprehend?"

"Somewhat. I don't--understand very well what's been happening. The commands in Ald Chimeris..."

Dagoth Ur spoke quietly as he reached out to wrap that strip of leather about her neck, and then fastened it, "Nerevar enjoyed very much being taken care of. As King he had always to be in control, to give commands to his people and his armies. It was to me he came when he needed to be free of that stress."

"What was the command that--?"

"Sit, boy." He stroked her hair, and then stood back up again. "The final test, the test that proved to me that you are what you are. That you are Nerevar, come back to me. No one else would react to those words that way, but Nerevar. Or his incarnate."

"The--Temple is going to kill me." She shivered again.

"No, no, we can't have that." A dark little chuckle came then, and he stood back up. "You clearly need this as much as Nerevar did. Now."

His tone shifted and he spoke in what she assumed was Ald Chimeris again.

"Follow."

Clearly, this was going to be a long night.

#morrowind #fanfiction #nerevarine #dagoth ur #dagoth ur has nerevar back and hes so happy

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leggerefiore · 9 months ago

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Can I request sfw and nsfw romantic hcs for giovanni?? He gives off sugar daddy vibessss 😩

I'll do NSFW later💕 someone else requested it, too, and I want to keep the posts separated so it's easier for those uninterested in that part to avoid lol

cw: interesting dynamics at play here, fluff

🚀Giovanni General Romance HCs🐈

🟥 The Rocket Boss may allow himself many leisures, but a romantic partner had not been one. The idea of risking something like that seemed like too much of a gamble that he simply did not wish to account for in his goings-on. Few people could even catch his eye in such a meaningful way. Whatever small affair he may have had with his executive had never been done with any intention of actually initiating something more seriously. The child that resulted was simply to be his heir, even if said child seemed to only want to reject the offer. Yet, when some overly defiant trainer was apparently keen to attempt to interfere with his plans. Well, they certainly had his attention whether they wanted it or not.

🟥 You seemed to want to mock him. The small bruise to his ego might as well have been a brutal, bleeding claw mark to him, however. It starts off as some strange game of cat and mouse. The roles could vary between you both, but he truly respected your strength and confidence. Which is how you ended up baited into a nice dinner with Giovanni. Things naturally only built from there… Why keep opposing him – Justice? Perhaps morality? He could provide much better things than that. You seemed more than tempted by the offer, which he simply enjoyed. He was more than happy to have you at his side.

🟥 PDA depends on the situation with him. During a meeting? If he can use it as an intimidation tactic, absolutely? You can sit on his lap while he has an arm wrapped around your waist. You are free to do whatever as long as it does not distract him too much. Giovanni will not be so into it if it is a time he wishes to appear more menacing, though. Basically, just read the room and find out what he is doing first. In the general public, he does like to keep a hand on you in some way. His line of work has made him many enemies, and he would hate to see you pay for it. An arm seems to find its way around your shoulder or a hand grasps at your wrist tightly. Kissing is more limited, though.

🟥 In private, Giovanni still varies quite a bit. There is time he needs to focus on his planning and thoughts. In those moments, he would prefer to be left alone. Yet, the opposite is true. There are times he wants nothing more than to have you close to him. Arms will pull you into his lap as he buries his face in your nape. He finds it strange that your presence alone draws out such positive feelings. He almost finds it addicting. When he returns home, you usually get greeted with a kiss as well. There is something foreign about the domestic sentiment that is thoroughly enjoyable. Sporadically, he seems to scratch at your head like he does his Persian's own. The action is quickly stopped after he realises what he is doing. A chuckle is all you get in response to your question of why.

🟥 Naturally, you are free to do whatever to him, too. In fact, he laps up your affections. It is a bit of an ego trip to him. Every kiss you lay upon his skin and every embrace that you lock him into. The way you cuddle with him in bed… He finds it different from the nuisance that he used to find you as. The feeling of your body close to his is a rare comfort that he almost wishes that he allowed himself sooner. It was so different from the pleasures of the body that he had accustomed himself to.

🟥 Dates are lavish outings that come most often when he has a successful affair in his work. Fancy dinners are preferred alongside outings to certain lounges around Kanto. Though, he would be happy to indulge your wishes, too. As long as it was not directly to a police station, you can drag him to the most garish places in the region. There is a certain preference to stick to cities, yet there are a few times he has enjoyed a nature walk with you. A certain trip to Viridian forest showed a strange side to him when stopped to gaze at a passing Nidoran. He ultimately shook his head and continued on with you, though.

🟥 There is some sort of faux domesticity shared between you both. He is not anywhere near a traditional lover, nor is there any expectation for you to align yourself with any role. Coming home to you is a nice change from the empty home he was more than used to. Being greeted by you after a long day completely breaks the annoyance that would otherwise flood his mind, his feels something prideful when his arms lock around your waist. It also shows up in how you both understand the other's preferences. A nostalgic meal waiting for him at home meshes well with the gift he saw got you while he was out and knew you would enjoy. Though, these moments are exceedingly rare with how busy he can get.

🟥 He does have a jealous streak, surprisingly. As confident and sure of himself he is, his business does not make him an easy man to love. It would be far too simple for him to be gone away for work and return to you in the arms of a much more loving person. Any attempts by others in flirting with you in public gets met with his savage glare and possibly even a very subtle threat. Many around him know better than to try anything like that with you. The longer your relationship with him goes on; however, he cools off from it. There is no need for such behaviour when it is clear that you are not going anywhere.

🟥 Some strange part of him desires for you to meet his son. The logical part of his brain knows that it would not be received well, yet there is some urge to reconnect with the boy and show him that he has made changes to himself. Silver would likely despise you, though. His feelings towards Giovanni were plain to observe. It is mostly a fantasy, he knows.

🟥 A relationship with Giovanni has many ups and downs, mixed with highs and lows. His work will always be his main focus, but it is obvious that he does care for you. He almost treats you like a pet cat at times, though. There are many risks involved with a relationship to a man like him, too, and the looming threat that he may just vanish one day if something goes to awry. But, perhaps, in the situation that he does disappear from his position, he will bring you along with him. It is impossible to tell with him. At least, it is fun while it lasts.

#pokemon x reader #giovanni x reader #pokemon giovanni x reader #giovanni/reader #pokemon/reader #pokemon giovanni/reader

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unabashednightmarepizza · 1 year ago

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𝐼𝑠𝑒𝑘𝑎𝑖'𝑑 𝐼𝑛𝑡𝑜 𝑇𝑒𝑦𝑣𝑎𝑡

Part 2

Life is strange.

You were in your world and doing godforsaken homeworks from your teachers and laying down idly while obsessing over maybe that game you started to obsess over... Then-

Now, seeing yourself in what appeared to be a godly attire in a gameworld that you barely knew wasn't on your list

Besides, how did you even come here?? You weren't actively trying to shift-

"Paimon thinks they are a bit pale..." she said while poking your arm that, surprisingly enough, didn't break or fall off during your fall. Hearing the familiar child voice of her, you widened your eyes and sat up on your hands and knees, letting out a high screech after throwing a comment.

"And Y/N can hear you, whoever you are." you groaned and they both screamed on top of their lungs much like you in fright, hugging each other thightly.

But... Why were you slapping your cheeks?

"This is insane... I didn't think those creepy and weird Isekai anime thing would happen to me!" you mumbled in deep shock, looking around yourself and seeing all the vibrant colors of Teyvat, the ones you were so used to seeing on screen...

Then came another startling thought: There were every kind of monsters, slimes, Hilichurls and even more dangerous and hard-to-kill ones.

Before you could freak out even more Aether, as the sweetheart he was, helped you, with Paimon finding something to burn to warm you up

They wondered how you were here, perhaps you also fell down like him and his sister and now were stuck? Since you looked, and still did, really horrified to find yourself here. But yet again, your looks was much different than anyone he had seen.

Shining bright eyes with sharp star shaped irises... They were mesmerizing, so alluring and so full of wonders, power as if they held the answers to all questions...

Where were you from?

But, apart from your obviously tall body, like really tall, and your star-like eyes which he found to be cute, there was another fact that stood out and made him realize how much trouble he would find himself in:

Your behaviour too which was becoming... concerning the poor boy.

Because who the fuck just kills an entire horde of elementals with just a quick flick of their... hand through sending golden waves singlehandedly with a cute smile and excited skip in their steps? Just how unhinged are you?

So, that was the first time you met the blonde who was way too pretty for a boy Aether and his cute companion Paimon, not that you didn't know them already.

" I think I will die very young, like very young..."

"Nah, you are the main character in this game. If you die, the game is over."

*Cue tripping into the lake headfirst but still managing to breathe with a thumbs up*

You just gave the biggest spoiler to anyone who would understand you but poor Aether, tho he tried to understand your words, didn't know shit about what you said.

Now, obviously, you couldn't tell them everything... That would, what, fuck with the order? The Heavenly Cosmic Rules? Whatever their names were, you really didn't want to anger anyone but also really wished to fuck with people.

Not now tho, you had to stay alive for that one.

But Aether had his own suspicions. He had been around long enough to know that he couldn't trust everyone but yet again... He needed another actual human who he could seek comfort when needed, be sure that they would have his back...

Poor, touch-starved boy ಥ⁠‿⁠ಥ

And he couldn't lie: You were funny as you tried to grab Paimon and squeeze her thightly to your chest, and even managed to kill a few of the hilichurls that came out of nowhere from behind your group...

Then there was the red tint of his cheeks, when you turned to look at him excitedly( not knowing that this was what you always wanted to do) and seeked his approval as if you needed it.

I mean, you were strong and pretty, a little bit too odd and obsessed with death and never took something serious, always praised him( God knew he needed that) and patted his head, even cooking delicious food that he never heard of before...

....

Exactly what he needed in another company!

"Hey,um, since you also came from another world probably... Whose language and words I absolutely don't understand, how about we stick together? I mean, I-I wouldn't want a woman to be alone, not that you can't take care of yourself, I just saw you-" he stammered nervously, absolutely not wanting to make you uncomfortable. But as you stared at the boy with a blush as his golden eyes looked at everything but you, there was only one single thought:

Hehehe cute ｡⁠◕⁠‿⁠◕⁠｡

"No problem, it would actually be amazing since I know nothing about this world!" (⁠ ⁠╹⁠▽⁠╹⁠ ⁠)

Lie, not completely but still a lie

But come on, his stutter was cute and besides he needed to have... a human sized companion in case things got so very wrong

Whether you were the human companion or not... Well, was unknown.

The poor, still-innocent Aether was eager to know your story. Where you were from, whether you came from another world like him too, how you used that power you obviously had but you had no idea of having it in the first place...

Poor boi was just so touch-starved, and had been so lonely until he stumbled upon Paimon two months after he woke up and one month later, you.

Besides, Paimon was not affectionate in the way he wished... More like, she was an emergency food~

"For the last time, Paimon is NOT AN EMERGENCY FOOD!"

Oh how you always loved watching her get riled up so easily

You three were each other's everything from now on.

So that was how you started to have adventures while trying hard to not to die. Paimon would offer her funny thoughts while sometimes giving really useful info, Aether would often cook for all three of you until you learnt how to make most of the food known here to help him.

He was already doing a lot by protecting you and making sure that none of the hilichurls were eating you

Though soon, his protection contract you did between the two of you unofficially came to an end when an excited young scout named Amber found you three and brought you to-

"Holy shit, Monstadt is even more beautiful in real life!" you exclaimed excitedly as Amber watched you three run happily, looking at everything in astonishment as if she was the one who created the city, nodding her head proudly at what you said. "The rumors don't do enough justice to us! Of course the real thing is much better!"

Poor girl... If only she knew that this world was actually a game and you were talking about that by saying "in real life".

Or whatver concept it was.

Even though the quality of the game was *chef kiss*, nothing could have prepared you for the gentle breeze that flew past you, how it made you shiver pleasantly as your hair danced around, the air of wine and... freedom filling your every cell.

This was definetly what home felt like.

You might not have enough knowledge about them, with being a new player and all and not having that obsession to know everything about them yet... But there was one thing obvious as your attention was on a certain florist: Her... obsession(?) over a certain redhead was very fucking obvious- was that a jewelry store?

Meanwhile, as Aether was left with a blue haired-cyro user who also had the same star eyes like you, trying to dodge all the flirty and suave comments... He searched for you desperately to get out of the situation he found himself in.

Because even if he was the fighter, you were the talker with a sweet voice and surprisingly very convincing when you wanted to be. Whether you were always like that was a mystery to solve another day.

"Paimon could always ask them! Y/N likes Paimon the best after all, they said so!"

"wHaT? Y/N! IS THAT TRUE, AFTER ALL THE TIME WE SPENT-"

That was the other side of Aether you didn't see much through playing the game. He was more excited and more lively, always running around and helping people while making new friendships whereas Lumine was more well-kept and calm.

Though to him, your and Paimon's friendship meant the most and he would never let you, her or him forget about that.

You three were quite the Trio after all!

Besides, your talent of negotiation worked wonders with him since you decided to use it to braid his hair and force him to sleep.

But if there was one thing he despised about you, which was also the only one, was the attention span of a baby you had whenever you saw something either shiny or cute.

Or someone attractive and hot...

Which showed itself again when he was called upon Kaeya's, the Cavalry Captain's, commands for a "super secret mission" and he wasn't able to flee out.

"The other knights can't know about it! I can't ask for help from any other than you... Please, help me." Aether swore he saw the hint of a smirk on his face-

"What kind of secrecy is this?? And what's with that eyepatch?"

"Well, to be honest my little friend... My great grandfather was a pirate!"

Yep, he better find a way to get out of this soon (⁠・⁠∀⁠・⁠)

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ideas-on-paper · 11 months ago

Text

A hypothetical look at the childhoods of Carlo and Romeo

Despite Carlo and Romeo being two of the most central characters of Lies of P, what we know about their backstory is next to marginal. We know that the two of them went to school together and were best friends (perhaps even more than that), but their time in Monad Charity House is only presented in snippets and fragmented memories, and despite being highly significant, their characters remain elusive - like shadows cast over the entirety of the story, always present, never tangible.

Thus, many have filled the gaps left in their characterization with their own imagination. As for myself, I was curious what their early lives might have been like, before they met at Monad Charity House - and since it was the closest thing to the game's setting I could find, I did some research on Victorian children and their upbringing.

What I found out, however, left me absolutely shocked and made me keenly aware of just how awful Carlo and Romeo's childhood must have been, going by historic standards. As pretty much everything during the Victorian Era, a child's upbringing was very dependent on social class - however, no matter if you grew up in a rich or poor family, each came with its own kind of suffering, and regarding the question of "What were Carlo and Romeo's lives like before Monad Charity House?", the brief answer would be: "Probably not great."

As for the long answer... I should mention this is my own interpretation of Carlo and Romeo's backgrounds, and none of this is officially confirmed. However, given what we know about the two's origins, I consider it quite plausible, and what we can conclude from it might not only give us better insight into their personalities, but also some of the real-life background behind the original fairy tale of Pinocchio.

Just as a fair warning, though: This is about to get a little depressing.

[Spoilers for Lies of P!]

[CW: mentions of very questionable parenting methods, depression, suicidal ideation, poverty, parent death, child labor, abuse and exploitation of children]

Carlo

For this analysis, I'm going to assume that Carlo was born into a fairly well-off household. (The description of Carlo's portrait calls him "an aristocratic boy", and since Geppetto is the mastermind behind Krat's puppet technology, I assume he'd have his fair share of the profits.)

By the standard of their time, upper-class children were quite spoiled: Unlike their working-class peers, they never had to worry about who was going to provide food for them, and the horrors of child labor were never of any concern to them. You would think that being born into a rich family doesn't leave you a single thing to wish for - you'd have nice toys, fine clothes... and well, everything, except for parental affection.

For the most part of the day, upper-class children wouldn't even see their parents - they were only summoned to appear before them at a set hour of the day, and during these occasions, they had to address their fathers as "sir". Essentially, meeting your parents was more like an audience with a stranger, a rare privilege strictly regulated by formality. Children were expected to act prim and proper, only allowed to speak when spoken to, and thus unable to express their true feelings, thoughts, or opinions. Any show of affection was extremely rare - Winston Churchill (1874 - 1945) once remarked that he could "count the times he had been hugged by his mother" as a child.

The parents were more or less completely absent from their children's lives, and when there actually was interaction between them, the children were expected to unconditionally obey their parents. Osbert Sitwell (1892 - 1969) once commented: "Parents were aware that the child would be a nuisance and a whole bevy of servants, in addition to the complex guardianship of nursery and school rooms was necessary not so much to aid the infant as to screen him from his father or mother, except on some occasions as he could be used by them as adjuncts, toys or decorations." (Can you imagine? Geppetto taking Carlo to some big social event to show off his "perfect little son", and Carlo just standing there and silently enduring the ordeal, looking at his father all the while and wondering "Did he ever realize I'm not one of his puppets?")

So, by the standard of the time period Lies of P is set in, Geppetto neglecting his son isn't even anything terribly unusual - in fact, that's perfectly normal Victorian upper-class parent behavior.

Since they didn't take care of their children themselves, upper-class parents would hire a nanny to raise them. Nannies would be instructed what kind of behavior and morals the parents wanted instilled into their child, and they would be responsible for their education as well as teaching them manners, propriety, how to dress and so on. As such, the nanny effectively acted as a substitute for the parents - and given that maid puppets exist and Geppetto probably wouldn't let any strangers near Carlo, Carlo's nanny was most likely a puppet as well.

The daily life of upper-class children was based on strict routine - some like to say it operated with "clockwork regularity". Breakfast would be served at 8 o'clock in the morning, dinner at 12 o'clock, and tea at 6 o'clock.* Children would very seldom leave their room, except to take short walks in the park with their nanny. Education would mostly be given at home by a tutor, which included basic lessons like reading, writing, and arithmetic, but also "socially appropriate skills" like dancing and playing the piano. (Since we see a puppet giving piano lessons to a child in the intro, chances are Carlo's tutors were also puppets.)

*Eating times varied throughout the Victorian Era; a "dinner" might also be a meal eaten during midday.

The rest of the time, children would have nothing to do but to play with their toys (except on Sundays, which was forbidden). Rich families had the luxury of being able to afford the most elaborate of toys, such as automated dolls, clockwork trains, and jack-in-the-boxes, which were extremely popular among children. In fact, since clockmakers were also the ones to build toys, I could imagine Geppetto actually made the toys for Carlo himself. (However, I feel like this only would have made Carlo loathe them; in his eyes, it would've been proof that "father pays more attention to the toys he makes for me than actually looking at me".)

In short, the life of Victorian upper-class children was lonely, depressing, and stuffy to the point of suffocating. Given these circumstances, I would actually be surprised if this didn't leave mental scars on Carlo. It has been documented that a lack of parental affection causes psychological issues lasting all the way into adulthood, such as low self-esteem, trust issues, anxiety, difficulty with social relationships, and lack of emotional control. Also, considering Carlo was probably surrounded by puppet servants all day, he wouldn't even have had a single human being to interact with most of the time - something which most likely had a detrimental effect on his psyche.

Given this dreary existence, it would make absolute sense for Carlo to look nothing short of depressed in every depiction we see of him. The feeling of emptiness when being pressed into the corset of others' expectations is actually something I'm well acquainted with - it feels like walking beside yourself, like your body moving while actually feeling dead inside. A bit like a puppet on strings, if you will. With his life being a monotonous routine controlled by someone else, it wouldn't be surprising if Carlo had difficulty still seeing a purpose in it. (There have been some theories going around that Carlo committed suicide; at the very least, I think it's highly likely he had suicidal ideations during his youth.)

Perhaps this is where Pinocchio - the character from the fairy tale - might have become something like an identification figure for Carlo. Pinocchio was a puppet, but instead of doing what his creator intended - what his father expected - he did whatever he wanted. I'm sure Geppetto gave him the book as a measure to educate him, but it ended up having the opposite effect. In fact, it might have been what first taught him the concept of freedom: Geppetto's puppets only ever did what he told them to, executing the exact actions he had programmed them with, over and over again - but Pinocchio showed Carlo that it didn't have to be this way. (I've seen a lot of interpretations of Carlo disliking puppets, and while I can see where this is coming from, I don't think this is because Carlo disliked puppets in general. Rather, I think he saw them as "extended arms" of his father and a symbol of his need to control everything around him; otherwise, it would be a little strange for Carlo to be attached to the story of Pinocchio so much.)

However, I think beneath all the pent-up frustration and hatred, there was also the wish for his father to love and appreciate him. At the end of the book, Pinocchio returns to his father after all the hardships he had to go through, and the two reconcile and live happily ever after. Since Pinocchio's father goes looking for him when he disappears, perhaps Carlo believed that if he rebelled against him and put himself in danger, Geppetto would realize that he actually cared for him.

So, if Carlo was very prone to temper tantrums and acting defiantly towards his father, it might have been on one hand to show that he didn't want to be part of Geppetto's perfect stage play anymore, and on the other because he was vying for his attention. Due to his upbringing, however, Carlo wasn't really able to communicate his feelings in a proper way. (I like to imagine Carlo as a very emotional person, but having difficulty to actually express his feelings.)

Geppetto, however, wouldn't have the sensitivity to understand this - he most likely would've tried to rectify his son's "mischievous behavior" by disciplining, as was typical for the time period (in general, it was believed that you had to "beat the evil out of children" for them to become a good person). Of course, that wouldn't have made things better - in fact, I wonder if part of the reason Geppetto sent Carlo to Monad Charity House was that he was just at a loss what to do with the boy. Since all of his educational measures were fruitless, perhaps he thought that sending him to the boarding school would finally put Carlo on the right track - although the result of that probably was also quite different from what Geppetto expected.

Romeo

Meanwhile, poor Victorian children had to live in a completely different, brutal reality - for them, day-to-day life was a literal struggle to stay alive.

We know that Romeo was an orphan, and according to Eugénie, that's not much of a rarity in Krat. Indeed, street children existed in abundance during Victorian times: It wasn't uncommon for working-class children to lose one or both parents - due to unsanitary conditions in Victorian slums, many people died of disease, and given the hazardous working conditions in factories and coal mines, accidents were commonplace. However, the term of a Victorian orphan was actually a little broader than that, also extending to children who ran away from home due to hailing from alcoholic and neglectful families. Often, mothers who were single or had a child out of wedlock would also simply abandon their children. Whatever the reason for their situation, these children were forced to fend for themselves at a very young age.

In the Trinity Sanctum in Krat Central Station, there's a note mentioning a "pickpocket who was overconfident in a gamble" and "had his heart stolen and died". Since Romeo made "a deal with the devil" (the "devil" presumably being Geppetto who turned him into a puppet), people have interpreted this as referring to Romeo. Turing to crime to support themselves was not a rarity among poor Victorian children - in fact, half of the defendants tried at the Central Criminal Court of England and Wales between 1830 and 1860 were aged 20 or younger. There were even organized gangs of child thieves who were trained in pickpocketing by a "captain", similar to those from Charles Dickens' novel Oliver Twist. (However, the items that were stolen most often were actually not purses or pocket watches, but handkerchiefs; silk handkerchiefs had a pretty high resale value, and the thieves would take them from pockets, rip out the initials, and resell them for a good price.)

We can't be sure whether Romeo teamed up with a few other kids or not, but personally, I'd wager he did - it would be much safer to operate in a group in case one of them gets in trouble, and overall, Romeo's personality seems a bit too caring for a lone wolf. (As the King of Puppets, he was not only determined to save as many humans as possible, but also possessed the unconditional trust and loyalty of the other puppets. To me, this means he most likely cared about them, and they cared about him in return - if it was just programming, the puppets probably wouldn't be lamenting his loss after he dies. Compare this to Geppetto, who has to use force and coercion for others to obey him.)

Also, since the notes in the Trinity Sanctums always seem to have a connection to the place where they're located (factory worker -> factory; cleric -> cathedral; "greatest singer"/Adelina -> opera house), that would mean the train station was most likely Romeo's base of operations.* (Train stations tend to be very popular among thieves, since it's easier to pick pockets in the confusion of people boarding or getting off trains.) This would imply that Romeo didn't grow up in Monad Charity House since he was an infant, but arrived there at a later point during his childhood.

*EDIT: I just had a thought that the note in the Trinity Sanctum could also mean the train station is the place where Romeo died. (All the other notes are connected to murder or some other violent action, and since we can assume they were written by Arlecchino, he was probably more interested in that.) Since Geppetto has his secret workshop wagon in Krat Central Station, maybe the place where he built P is the same where he built Romeo.

Since there were so many orphaned children, the few orphanages that existed couldn't receive all of them. Instead, workhouses were established as institutions for all kinds of destitute people - including orphans - who were unable to support themselves and were given lodging and food in exchange for labor. However, many children actually preferred living on the streets, rather turning to crime than going to the workhouse. At a first glance, this may seem a bit unreasonable - surely, not having to run around in worn-down rags and steal your food just to survive would at least be an improvement?

Well... Turns out, not really. The conditions in Victorian workhouses were notoriously awful - they were overcrowded, unsanitary, and cruel places to live. Daily routine was strictly regimented, consisting of 9–10 hours of repetitive and physically demanding labor and very little free time. What little food there was was of poor quality, privacy was basically nonexistent, and the dozens of inmates sleeping together in dormitories often had to share their beds - children usually had to sleep up to four in a bed. The consequences for refusal of work or any kind of rule violation were beatings, deprivation of food, being locked up in solitary confinement in a dark cell, and other draconian punishments.

If this doesn't sound like a very hospitable atmosphere, that's because that was the exact intention behind it. Workhouses weren't meant to support poor people - they were supposed to scare them into finding work and make a living for themselves. Victorians viewed poverty as a self-imposed misery, and if you were a pauper, that was because you were lazy, retarded, or made bad choices in life. That's why beggars, vagrants, orphans, criminals, and mentally ill people were all indiscriminately housed in workhouses, because from the Victorian point of view, they all belonged to the same category of people: A stain that had to be removed from the public eye, either by forcing them to support themselves or by making use of their work force once they had donned the workhouse uniform. They were a nuisance to society, and their treatment in the workhouse was sure to make them feel that.

One of the worst fates for workhouse children, however, was to be hired out as pauper apprentices: Usually from 10-13 years of age, but sometimes as young as eight or seven, workhouses would send pauper children to factories in the countryside for an "apprenticeship". This "apprenticeship" involved factory owners buying children from orphanages and workhouses and making them sign a contract that lasted until they were 21 years of age, dictating that the apprentices had to be provided with food and accommodation, and in exchange, the factory owner was free to make use of their working power.

So in summary, workhouse orphans were essentially sold into slavery. This was all that much easier to do with children who had no parents and no other means to support themselves, and thus were free to be exploited by their employers. Some of the recollections from these former pauper apprentices are just utterly horrific - and in this case, I think it's appropriate to let the victims speak for themselves.

John Birley, who lost his father when he was two, lived in the Bethnal Green Workhouse for a time after his mother died of illness when he was around six. He was sent to Litton Mill as a pauper apprentice, and he had this to say about his experiences in an interview with The Ashton Chronicle in 1849 (source):

The same year my mother died, I being between six and seven years of age, there came a man looking for a number of parish apprentices. We were all ordered to come into the board room, about forty of us. There were, I dare say, about twenty gentlemen seated at a table, with pens and paper before them. Our names were called out one by one. We were all standing before them in a row. My name was called and I stepped out in the middle of the room. They said, "Well John, you are a fine lad, would you like to go into the country?" I said "Yes sir". We had often talked over amongst ourselves how we should like to be taken into the country, Mr. Nicholls the old master, used to tell us what fine sport we should have amongst the hills, what time we should have for play and pleasure. He said we should have plenty of roast beef and get plenty of money, and come back gentlemen to see our friends. The committee picked out about twenty of us, all boys. In a day or two after this, two coaches came up to the workhouse door. We were got ready. They gave us a shilling piece to take our attention, and we set off. I can remember a crowd of women standing by the coaches, at the workhouse door, crying "shame on them, to send poor little children away from home in that fashion." Some of them were weeping. I heard one say, "I would run away if I was them." They drove us to the Paddington Canal, where there was a boat provided to take us. We got to Buxton at four o'clock on Saturday afternoon. A covered cart was waiting for us there. We all got in, and drove off to the apprentice house at Litton Mill, about six miles from Buxton. The cart stopped, and we marched up to the house, where we saw the master, who came to examine us and gave orders where we were put. [...] Our regular time was from five in the morning till nine or ten at night; and on Saturday, till eleven, and often twelve o'clock at night, and then we were sent to clean the machinery on the Sunday. No time was allowed for breakfast and no sitting for dinner and no time for tea. We went to the mill at five o'clock and worked till about eight or nine when they brought us our breakfast, [...] We then worked till nine or ten at night when the water-wheel stopped. We stopped working, and went to the apprentice house, about three hundred yards from the mill. It was a large stone house, surrounded by a wall, two to three yards high, with one door, which was kept locked. It was capable of lodging about one hundred and fifty apprentices. Supper was the same as breakfast - onion porridge and dry oatcake. We all ate in the same room and all went up a common staircase to our bed-chamber; all the boys slept in one chamber, all the girls in another. We slept three in one bed. [...] Mr. Needham, the master, had five sons: Frank, Charles, Samuel, Robert and John. The sons and a man named Swann, the overlooker, used to go up and down the mill with hazzle sticks. Frank once beat me till he frightened himself. He thought he had killed me. He had struck me on the temples and knocked me dateless. He once knocked me down and threatened me with a stick. To save my head I raised my arm, which he then hit with all his might. My elbow was broken. I bear the marks, and suffer pain from it to this day, and always shall as long as I live. I was determined to let the gentleman of the Bethnal Green parish know the treatment we had, and I wrote a letter with John Oats and put it into the Tydeswell Post Office. It was broken open and given to old Needham. He beat us with a knob-stick till we could scarcely crawl. Sometime after this three gentlemen came down from London. But before we were examined we were washed and cleaned up and ordered to tell them we liked working at the mill and were well treated. Needham and his sons were in the room at the time. They asked us questions about our treatment, which we answered as we had been told, not daring to do any other, knowing what would happen if we told them the truth."

In case there were any surviving family members, the children were sometimes deported without their knowledge. In 1849, Sarah Carpenter related the story of her lost brother who was taken away from Bristol Workhouse to The Ashton Chronicle (source):

When I was eight years old my father died and our family had to go to the Bristol Workhouse. My brother was sent from Bristol workhouse in the same way as many other children were - cart-loads at a time. My mother did not know where he was for two years. He was taken off in the dead of night without her knowledge, and the parish officers would never tell her where he was. It was the mother of Joseph Russell who first found out where the children were, and told my mother. We set off together, my mother and I, we walked the whole way from Bristol to Cressbrook Mill in Derbyshire. We were many days on the road. Mrs. Newton fondled over my mother when we arrived. [...] My brother told me that Mrs. Newton's fondling was all a blind; but I was so young and foolish, and so glad to see him again; that I did not heed what he said, and could not be persuaded to leave him. They would not let me stay unless I would take the shilling binding money. I took the shilling and I was very proud of it. They took me into the counting house and showed me a piece of paper with a red sealed horse on which they told me to touch, and then to make a cross, which I did. This meant I had to stay at Cressbrook Mill till I was twenty one.

So, if the situation in the Lies of P universe in any way resembles that during the real-life 19th century, and if these street children are in any way smart, I think it's very understandable they'd want to stay the hell away from the workhouse or any similar institution. Of course, it would be easy to attribute this to laziness, but honestly, I'd say they just wanted to avoid the abuse. (You could pose the question whether there are even any lowly paid jobs for children to do in the LoP universe, since a lot of those were probably taken over by puppets. However, if you ask me, that might only lead to employers trying to underbid the price that puppet laborers would cost, which would lead to serious wage cuts for any human workers - we know there was a violent protest of the factory labor union, which might have happened for a reason like this. Also, I reckon the puppet industry itself would create new branches of "dirty work", like recycling parts from scrapped puppets, disposing of puppet junk, etc.)

In fact, these harrowing stories happen to have quite a few parallels to the original fairy tale of Pinocchio. Did you notice? The children are taken away in coaches and carts, in a way that conceals their presence (e.g. in a covered cart or in the dead of the night), which is very reminiscent of the Coachman picking up boys at night (in the book, the coach is described as having wrapped wheels, so it doesn't make noise and can't be discovered). At first, the children are told they can make a fortune by working in the textile mills and will have plenty of time for leisure - in A memoir of Robert Blincoe from 1828, it's even mentioned they tried to lure children into working in a cotton mill by telling them that "they would be transformed into ladies and gentlemen" when they arrived there, that "they would be fed on roast beef and plum pudding, be allowed to ride their masters' horses, and have silver watches, and plenty of cash in their pockets". This sounds quite similar to the Coachman promising the boys unlimited play time and freedom if they come with him to the Land of Toys. However, as both the pauper apprentice children and the boys from Pinocchio had to realize, all of this was a fraud to exploit them for what is essentially slave labor.

This also suggests that with his depiction of the Land of Toys, Carlo Collodi was doing more than just telling a horror story to scare kids into behaving. He was commenting on a real-life problem - and this, exactly this, is what Collodi wanted to warn his young readers about. In that sense, the boys turning into donkeys might also be a metaphor for what their employers saw them as: livestock, to be used and abused as they pleased.

Because the living conditions of workhouse children were so appalling, there was clamor for change, specifically among the reformist middle class. It was argued that orphans and destitute children should be housed in an institution meant exclusively for them, rather than together with criminals, cripples, and lunatics. The movement really began to pick up speed in mid-19th century, and many orphanages were founded by private benefactors and philanthropists. One of the most influential was Thomas John Barnardo, the founder of the charity Barnardos, who built homes for waifs, strays, and all kinds of children in need to provide them with a place to live, food, and education.

In general, there was an effort to make education accessible to even the lowest classes. Sunday Schools and Ragged Schools were established, which allowed poor children to take classes without having to pay a fee, giving them more opportunities in later life. However, the parents of working-class children were often against them going to school, since it meant that they couldn't work to earn additional income for the family. This is why attending school was made mandatory for all children between 5 and 10 in 1870, with the leaving age being raised to 11 in 1893. (This is also what Carlo Collodi meant by saying "for the love of God, get yourself some education" - because if you didn't, you would be stuck in a circle of bone-breaking labor forever.)

The Monad Charity House fits quite well into this historical frame: We do know that the Rose Estate was originally a charity organization for poor children, but was turned into a boarding school after Lady Isabelle and the Monad family started sponsoring money. Since charities for poor children are a phenomenon of the mid- to late-19th century, it's possible the situation was a lot worse before in the Lies of P universe as well. Romeo might not have gone there willingly (perhaps he was caught during one of his thefts), and truth be told, Victorian schools weren't the most rosy of affairs (if you'd like to know the details, feel free to check out this page). However, given what could've been his fate, Romeo probably considered himself lucky to be alive and not exploited by someone else for donkey work. (Still, one thing that should be kept in mind is that the Alchemists' patronage of the Rose Estate probably isn't based on purely altruistic motives: Since all of the children are trained as Stalkers, Alchemists, or Workshop Technicians, all of them ultimately become part of Krat's economic apparatus.)

It seems almost miraculous that two boys coming from such different worlds would develop such a strong bond. However, despite this, they had one experience in common: pain. Although the way in which they suffered might have differed, they both knew what it's like to be abandoned. Romeo had to grow up in a society that didn't care whether he lived or died, and since all Carlo ever received from his father was scrutiny or cold ignorance, he probably felt the same about him. Living in a cruel world where the odds were stacked against them, it's easy to see why these kindred souls sought comfort in each other.

In any case, if the untold backstory of these characters was crafted with this in mind, my sincerest compliments go to the people of Neowiz/Round8 for not only taking such a nuanced approach to child education in a historical context, but also for doing so with respect to the original story by Carlo Collodi. It may be really subtle at times, but you can't deny how much effort the devs put into the themes - themes that are so universal to human psychology that they continue to be relevant today, and undoubtedly made the story resonate with a lot of people.

#lies of p #lies of p carlo #lies of p romeo #lies of p geppetto #analysis #lore theories #the adventures of pinocchio #carlo collodi #I've never used so many content warnings in a post before xD #Carlo seriously has one of the most messed up family situations I've ever seen #like I knew it was bad; but I had no idea it was THAT BAD #also I was floored when I found out that the Coachman essentially had a real-life inspiration #anyway here I am back to trying to deduce story contents based on historical comparisons xD

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