#I will always fondly remember you and your jiggly starfish butt
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uwudonoodle · 3 months ago
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I will preface this by saying I am not into the whole live action superhero thing that's been going on for the last 20 years (I specify live action, because animated Miles Morales Spiderman is the exception for me).
Today while at the gym, I got my first exposure to DC's Suicide Squad. I only caught the last 30 minutes of the movie while walking on the treadmill. The TV was like 35 feet away, too far to even read subtitles, and I was listening to music at the time. With that context, here's my thoughts:
So this one-eyed dude shows up to terrorize the city, and my first thought is - Is this an episode of MST3K?
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Then out of it's armpit flies all these tiny starfish that latched onto people's faces, ala alien style.
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It's a good thing I didn't see this in theaters, because I have never had such a hard time stifling giggles in public.
Then this guy shows up, and at first I thought that they'd forgotten to CG out his dot suit, but nope that's just his superhero outfit.
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What's your superhero name, bud? Mr. Wonderbread?
Then out of nowhere, somebody bitch slapped Viola Davis. It's a good thing treadmills have handles, because I about died when she dropped out of frame. Hope she's okay.
Then Barbie jumped inside the starfish, and every rat in the city followed her. Even though I was wondering if she was going to drown, it was somehow shot as this ethereal beautifully scene???
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Also, did they spend the entire budget on that fat starfish's jiggle physics? It was so bouncy...
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