#I went back to the old Dragon Age games to get a feel for something 😭
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mourn-and-watch · 3 days ago
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in all seriousness, dragon age being almost officially dead to me is, like, whatever. i'm used to hanging out in dead fandoms because i'm usually extremely late to the party so i think i'll manage. i was excited for veilguard but even if it was bad bad for me (which it wasn't. i have my problems with it but they didn't ruin the franchise for me) i would also manage because dragon age to me always was extremely flawed but had an enormous potential for fan content. at some point i started to treat it like my favourite fantasy playground where i can smash pre-existing barbie dolls with the ones i made myself. all my barbie dolls are in place and i still can do whatever i want (and i plan to continue to do so) and, i guess, i shouldn't be upset.
i am upset, however. for all the devs affected by laid-offs, but especially the writers. these people created dragon age as we know it, and it's been a messy series in every aspect, including the writing, it's been insensitive at times, at times dumb and undercooked, but there was always an immense amount of potential that's been inspiring fans for years, and also a feeling that all, or at least the most of it was created with genuine passion. and realizing that there is no one left from the team that made dragon age what it is, every installment of it, is just. genuinely sad. and it's not a theseus ship dilemma, because it's not like they were slowly replaced one by one. they were just fired. this ship is destined to sink, it's falling apart in front of our eyes because neither ea nor bioware cares about writing. not many companies do nowadays, to be honest. and it's kinda devastating. grifters will celebrate that like a "downfall of woke slop", but they'll get only more ai slop instead, lol, because good writing doesn't guarantee good sells. best selling games of 2024 are shooters and sports games. and elden ring which is a nice exception, but an exception nevertheless.
i don't think mass effect will save bioware at this point. even if it's an absolute banger it still has to meet ea's expectations. which are unrealistic, to say the least. also people who wrote characters like mordin, tali, legion, thane, garrus and liara are all gone. either they left themselves or were laid off. like, if you want "old bioware magic" to return, there is none. the same people who wrote your favourite characters and storylines in da/me were also working on veilguard. i may be wrong, but somehow i think they didn't all lose their ability to write here because they went woke or whatever. i think the inconsistent quality of datv writing that can only be described as 'we're so back/it's so over' pic is a consequence of multiple rewrites, constant director changes and shitty decisions, both internal and coming from bioware/ea higher-ups. i also may be wrong, but it wouldn't be such a big problem if writing wasn't at the bottom of priority list.
if i recall correctly, when gaider left willingly, he highlighted that bioware didn't treat its writers seriously at that point. and i'd say that tracks. like, from countless veilguard rewrites and scrapped ideas to lay-offs of every single studio veteran.
idk what else there is to say. i'll cheer for every studio that value its writers and i hope all ex-bioware devs will be able to do something new and exciting. i also doubt bioware is the last studio that will experience such a decline in the years to come. the narrative of this shitshow will also be twisted into 'go woke go broke' and it already slightly draws me insane. fuck ea fuck bioware fuck grifters. also i beg everyone to start appreciating writing as a craft because otherwise it's only going to get worse!
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elvyn · 2 months ago
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Interesting how one sad worm almost turned the world upside down
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vaguely-concerned · 3 months ago
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I was just ambushed within the turbulent halls of my own mind by some headcanons about rye ingellvar's childhood that did 15000000 points of psychic damage to me and my heart personally and also made me almost sure of how I want to play it all at the end (very very differently from how I imagined going in!). some 'oh holy fuck this changes everything' rocking my own world bullshit going on in my neurons right now I'm reeling
#I'm sorry to say that despite what I expected I think the dread wolf might be going down violently on my first run???#not because *I* love solas any less but because of who rye is and some of the twists I know happen down the line#which does make for a neat thing b/c I meant to play the crow I'm going with second as initially incredibly hostile#and then growing to feel for him and redeeming him at the end.#so if rye starts out very reasonable and sympathetic and then is brought to 'haha. no. fuck you forever for that in particular' at the end#...a pleasing cosmic symmetry in it I must admit. perfect and also makes me feel a bit sick#I'll try to put together something coherent eventually but for now#it's sort of a 'my name is ellaryen ingellvar you killed the guy#that my brain went 'close enough welcome back beloved and much missed deceased father figure' over. prepare to despair and die'#I think just the killing part might not have done it but everything that comes after? rye is a chill guy until he finally decides#that enough is fucking *enough*. and that was the most enough of all time for them#it also explains rye's accent (one of his primary caregivers growing up was a dwarf)! so many birds with one stone here#also I am so fucking sad now and I did it entirely to myself. I love fiction I love games (embarassingly genuine)#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#oc: ellaryen ingellvar#thank god that the romanced solas playthrough is the second one tho that does make things less dire haha#adaar would have given it the good old college try to get solas to change his mind right to the end I think#but even his capable hands and politician's mind could not hold back the sheer beware the fury of a patient man storm#that is about to hit solas for the shit he just pulled. I think rye and solas are -- as it turns out -- TOO alike in many ways#...solas buddy I'm so sorry I'll come back for you on the second playthrough and make it right I swear fhsak#it's just that a second dead dwarf dad has joined the chat to haunt the narrative (and this time it's fucking personal frfr)#it's almost scary how quick I've gotten attached to my rook tho. I've waited A DECADE to save this bald elf man from himself#and then rye shows up with steel in his normally kind eyes going 'no. I want that fucker *dead*'. and I just go anything for you babyboy#I'll see what we can do. unspeakable stuff
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flowersforthemachines · 30 days ago
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Some facts about Harding gathered from the banters
I went through all companion banters on DanaDuchy's channel after playing the game to write down all facts about companions/the world that I haven't seen brought up anywhere in the game as a writing reference (and for funsies).
Note: This list may not be exhaustive. I might have missed some something or didn't write it down because I considered it common knowledge. If you have anything to add, please DM me or send an ask! (do specify what banter the information is coming from, though)
Note 2: Posts from this series (mostly) don't include information from banters specific to quests or between companions and faction members. I plan to do another playthrough to capture more of those and will add any relevant info to the character posts.
Other characters' posts: Bellara, Davrin, Lucanis, Emmrich, Neve, Taash. I'm also planning a post about just the Lighthouse some time later
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Family and past:
Harding's parents split up a few years ago. Her father lives in Amaranthine. She's okay with that and thinks her parents are happier apart
Harding’s mother never taught her how to cook, she's entirely self-taught
Harding carries around the first letter her Mother sent her after joining the Inquisition
Harding doesn't have siblings 
Harding had a mabari named Contessa who passed away from old age
(If in romance) Taash offers Harding to get a mabari together
Time with the Inquisition:
Back in Skyhold, Solas once told Harding he was sorry dwarves couldn’t dream
Harding thinks that if she had never joined the Inquisition, she probably would’ve got married and tended to goats
Harding volunteered for the Inquisition because their soldiers kept scaring the sheep because they all had super old maps. And because she didn't want to spend the rest of her life watching sheep
General: 
Harding likes sandwiches, they are one of her favourite foods 
Harding finds Treviso very beautiful (who doesn’t) 
Harding would bring a bow, clean socks and a spoon to a deserted island
Harding likes books about blood and gore
Harding doesn't like killing, but she doesn't feel bad about it. She compares it to farmers having to kill wild animals that get too close to their land, as sometimes a quick kill can prevent more suffering (i.e. if a wolf gets inside your sheepfold, your own animals will die in pain)
She says that this kind of mindset is the reason why a lot of Inquisition scouts came from farmers, as they need to kill people when necessary (even if those people aren’t their enemies personally), but don’t go out looking for it
Harding likes almonds. They are crunchy :) 
Harding is fascinated by Minrathous’s nightlife 
Harding doesn't drink alcohol 
Harding really likes puns
Harding has fought a Stormrider dragon before 
Harding has a detailed and decorated scrapbook with her kills (with doodles. Including a cute giant spider)
Harding never visited Nevarra before the Veilguard, though she had heard of Cumberland’s Summer Exhibition. Emmrich disregards it as just a market with a horse show 
Dwarves and magic:
Harding finds herself more hungry than usual since getting hew new powers
Neve and Emmrich hypothesise that Harding developing Titan powers may have increased her lifespan (or even granted her eternal life) 
Harding describes using her magic as “touching something vast and eternal, a well, deep inside”. Lucanis says that it sounds similar to him using his demon powers
Relationships with companions:
Bellara, Neve and Taash call her “Lace”. Davrin and Lucanis call her “Harding”
Emmrich calls her "Harding" most of the time, though he calls her "Lace" on two occasions (in a banter about Emmrook, and the one where he talks about seeing her aura differently after he becomes a Lich)
Harding grows special plants for Davrin to help him mask the griffon smell in his room
Harding grows truffles for Assan
Harding lets Assan sleep on her
To Lich!Emmrich, Harding appears different from other dwarves. She has a special aura (but it comes and goes)
Harding buys an enchanted barbed arrow to take out Lucanis/Spite if push comes to shove. She later tries to give it to Lucanis and apologises, but he insists she keeps it as a sign of his trust
Harding finds Teia intimidating because she is “polished” (Lucanis disagrees but notes she keeps good track of all utensils Viago poisoned at the table) 
Teia called Harding fearless in a conversation with Lucanis
Harding invites Neve to her house in Ferelden after Neve's apartment in Minrathous burns down, in case she wants to get away from the Lighthouse 
Harding is very excited about Neve taking over the Threads (“Do they have to kiss your hand?”) and wishes she were a crime boss
Harding once dreamt of Neve stealing her strawberry tarts
Harding starts humming Taash’s name to herself after they get together
About gifts from Taash: 
Harding doesn’t use the archery bracer because it feels so special she’s afraid it could get lost or get dirty
She also doesn’t wear the hairpin because she’s afraid to lose it
Taash got the cheese in Minrathous
Conclusion: get Harding cheese, it’s the only thing she isn’t afraid to actually use
Garden and plants: 
It's enough to mention a plant for it to start growing in Harding’s garden
The Fade plants normally don’t need tending. However, they may begin to wilt if that’s what you expect them to do 
Smuggler’s Rose clouds the person’s mind if you are wearing it like perfume, letting you pickpocket other people more easily
Sage bane mixed with troll moss can be used to treat toenail fungus
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lavellaned · 2 months ago
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Actually I think one of the reasons why this game is so awful to get through is how it treats abuse, abusers, and abuse victims.
Under cut due to length of rambling:
First of all, Morrigan. Abused as a child by her mother, Flemeth aka Mythal, learned about the world and how to interact with it in a skewed way. Was treated in a way that no child should be by anyone let alone their parent.
Fast forward to Inquisition, particularly a worldstate in which Kieran is alive. The scene in the fade where Morrigan confronts Flemythal is one of the most important and special scenes in all of dragon age to me.
Growing up through abuse as a child you never think "I don't deserve this", you mainly think things like "Why is this happening to me?" and "Bad things happen to me." You know that these things are bad and make you feel bad, but when your baseline for how you should experience the world is abusive, you don't have the point of reference to think otherwise. And then you grow up. You look back on the abuse through the eyes of the child who experienced it but also through the detached, adult view that you currently have and have to reconcile the two. It's not easier nor pleasant. Getting to the age your abuser was/getting into the position of power your abuser had over you is difficult. Being at that stage and picturing yourself doing what was done to you to someone else is fucking sickening, and then you start to realize "I wasn't the problem, it WASN'T my fault, YOU are the one that's fucked up." But a lot of people can't and therefore the cycle of abuse continues.
But Morrigan does. She straight up tells her abuser "I will not be the mother you were to me." To have a character who survived childhood abuse be able to reach a point in their life where they can take back their personhood from their abuser is pretty damn important, actually. To this day I get weepy just thinking about it.
And then fucking veilguard happened.
Not only does it not matter if Kieran is alive or if Morrigan drank from the well (something that would BIND HER SPIRIT TO HER ABUSER), but Morrigan straight up let Mythal hitch a ride in her. The very thing that Morrigan tried to prevent ever since the first goddamn game? And we're all just supposed to accept and be ok with this?
The only way I can see this not being a complete character assassination of Morrigan is if Mythal just straight up possessed her unwillingly/killed her. Have Mythal use Morrigan as a information receptacle for new players, but also use old players' already-implemented relationship with her as a way to manipulate them. Either way, shit sucks.
Then there's the Crows. You know, the guild who takes children from brothels, orphanages, the streets and puts them through Hunger Games levels of training in which they either die or survive to become a slave assassin for the rest of their life. Not in veilguard. We're all just one big happy family. We rule Antiva, yippee!
Finally, there's Solas. One could argue his entire existence is the product of abuse, and everything that has happened in Thedas is because of it. I think framing his regrets as physical manifestations that want to kill him is a really interesting narrative choice. Unlocking the regret murals was one of the very few parts of this game that invoked a strong emotional response from me, not just because I'm an unapologetic Solas Enjoyer but because the implications are heartbreaking.
And then the game has you sit through the most fucking unbearable CBT group therapy session to talk about them with some of the most annoying damn people in Thedas who treat the literal apocalyptic levels of abuse Solas went through for millennia as something like a joke? And we the player are not given the option to challenge this? This game makes the point to force the player to agree with the flippant attitudes brought up from this.
Then brings up the final scene with Solas. Do I think the meeting with Mythal and Solas was handled well? Yes and no, but that's for another time. Solas is so far in the trenches of the trauma of abuse that he will not stop until his abuser pretty much tells him "I'm done abusing you." I think this was good and bad, again another time.
The way Solas interacts with his abuser is the direct flipside of how Morrigan does. You see more than one way someone can heal/not heal from it.
Morrigan, someone with arguable little power in the world, stands up against her abuser unflinchingly.
Solas, described through history as a GOD, someone with unfathomable amounts of knowledge and power, cowers and offers his abuser a literal weapon to kill him with, unprompted.
If this was a good game, it would be about regret but also about survivor's guilt, something that those who survived abuse have to deal with for the rest of their lives. But it's not, because it's a a bad game.
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cpattersonevans · 1 month ago
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A Love Letter to My Inquisitor
As my first ever post, I felt compelled to write a love letter of sorts to my Inquisitor Lavellan. I have been playing RPGs for a long time, but have never been very good at the 'role playing' aspect. Until recently I had always played Dragon Age as a female human, struggling to make decisions that I would not make in real life. Prior to the announcement of Veilguard I had not played a DA game in probably 6 or 7 years, but to reacquaint myself with the world I decided to replay them (starting at DA2 because my computer hates DAO). This time, I was determined to play as an elf for the first time ever in Inquisition...and romance Solas for the first time ever. I enjoyed the Solas romance. I knew going in that it would not be a happy ending, but I knew nothing of how it would actually develop. I absolutely loved this playthrough. So much so, that right after I finished it the first time all the way through to the end of Trespasser, I restarted a new game to play as Lavellan again, willingly choosing to slog through each collection quest (maybe I'd finally find that one last mosaic piece - I did not). Not because I wanted to relive the romance, but because I missed HER.
In Inquisition, my Lavellan was cold and stoic at first, angry at those who blame her for something she knows nothing about...she literally woke up like this. However, she starts to show her true self to those who slowly go from mere acquaintance to respected friend. She was somewhat tactless and blunt, not having much experience interacting with the human world. She was reluctant to accept the position as leader, always asserting that she is NOT the Herald of Andraste. Seriously, how many times does she have to say this! She continues to express her anger and reluctance when the title of Inquisitor is thrust upon her. She never wanted this! She gets shit done, always focused on the task at hand. She hopes that once she fixes everything, she can go back to her old life. Oh how she was mistaken. As time went on she leaned more into her Dalish identity and enjoyed making decisions in favor of the elves (bye bye Celene). She realized that, although she never wanted to be Inquisitor, she may be able to take advantage of this opportunity for the betterment of her people. Dorian, Cassandra, Varric and Iron Bull became her besties (Sera never stopped thinking she was too elfy). As for the romance. She (me) was not attracted to Solas at first, I still found myself very much liking Cullen (had romanced him and Blackwall previously as female human). I even laughed that Cullen is probably the one people would tell her she should be with, but Solas ended up being the one she was fated to be with. Over the course of the game she realized her attraction towards him was growing. The more conversations they had, the more missions they found themselves in relying on each other to survive, they slowly grew closer and fell in love. Plus...that voice. This relationship was different than any I'd experienced in a game before. It felt like, for them, more was expressed in what wasn't said...or how it was said. I could feel the passion between them. When the break up came, she was ANGRY. I will take any chance I get to yell at Solas in Elven. But, she had a mission to complete. She was fine.
Then Trespasser came. Two years later and still the leader of a massive political organization. How did she get here? She never wanted this. She could still care less about politics. Everyone, please stop asking her about Solas. She doesn't want to talk about it. She is fine. Except...she's not. The closer they get to Solas, the more those repressed feelings come to the surface. Solas was HeLpInG us with the Qunari all along! Face palm. I hated this delulu response, but had to do it. When they finally meet face to face, turns out she's still ANGRY. Cue more angry yelling in Elven. HE SHOULD HAVE TRUSTED HER. Not understanding the full extent of his plans, she offers to help. He won't let her. She vows to save him, this isn't the only way. Bye bye hand. Angry Inquisition book drop. Bye bye Inquisition. She never wanted this.
Now comes Veilguard. I will preface that I have not read any fanfiction. I have only been a solavellan for about 4 or 5 months, so I understand this influences my perspective on how things play out in Veilguard. I had no headcannon. I had no expectations for both the Inquisitor's reappearance and the possibilities of closure. I, of course, hoped her and Solas would reunite, but also knew there was a very strong chance one or the other (or both) could die by the end of the game, because Dragon Age.
I actually liked how Lavellan was portrayed. I don't think it's fair to judge how she has lived for the past 10 years based on the few moments we have with her in the game. I don't think she sounds pathetic or sad. To me she sounds, wise, mature, and like someone who has just seen too much shit. Her voice was filled with sorrow. She has had 10 years to ponder everything that happened during Inquisition, replay every moment, every conversation had with Solas. At first she was so so angry, but over time that anger turned into understanding, then forgiveness. This is not to say that the anger is gone completely, sometimes anger reappears when we least expect it, as it often does when we mourn what was lost, but it does not drive her. Over time, she learns how to manage it, to navigate it, to accept it so that each time it hurts a little less. This is the closest they've been to catching Solas. She finds a memory statue of his. She can feel him, feel that it has something to do with him. It is after this that all those feelings, emotions, start flooding back to her. She never stopped loving him. However, the world has gone to shit. She never wanted this, but knows her title, her position, still carries some weight. She steps up to lead once more in the South. To be the person that people need her to be. She doesn't fully express her feelings about Solas until after she hears about the events that occurred in Arlathan, that he helped save Dalish elves from Elgar'nan. Hope returns, maybe, just maybe, the Solas she knew is still in there somewhere, but...she has a world to save first.
The atonement ending is a great ending. I had no expectations, but I wasn't expecting this. I don't think a game ending as ever made me cry so much. It was very cathartic. Maybe because I had played all of these games back to back then straight into Veilguard, so emotions were high.
Lavellan was never going to turn Solas from his path on her own. Her appeals to him didn't work in Trespasser, why would that be any different now? But she vowed to save him from himself, and those that knew him from the Inquisition truly believed he wanted to be stopped. That it was his pride, himself, getting in his own way. She had to try, but this time she has back up. Solas is released from his duty, he is free. She reassures him that there is another path forward, together. Sure, she could have walked in there, spewing more angry Elven at him, but she is not the same Lavellan she was 10 years ago. She is wiser more mature. This does not mean that this anger won't come up later, but she understands that this is NOT the time for that. It's not about her in this moment, it's about him. It's about saving the world. She accepts her fate. Before joining the fight in the North, she made sure all of her duties were appropriately delegated in the South. When her best friend asks her if she will be leaving again after all of this is over, her reply - "something like that." She knew. She joins her vhenan in the Fade to heal both each other and the blight. I do believe that the Fade prison will not be as bad with them together. She will help him confront his regrets and one day they will be able to leave just like Rook did (Rook's regrets honestly pale in comparison, so it will take him more time), but they will have calmed the blight in the process. Someday they will be able to travel the Fade freely and visit old friends, both spirit and corporeal.
She left the world she knew, left behind the title of Inquisitor. She never wanted this. In Trespasser, Cassandra tells her "Being Inquisitor has brought you good things. Many good things. But only a few have been by your choice. Take what happiness you can from those, and do not let them go." And she doesn't.
This turned into a long post, but all this to say...Lavellan holds a special place with me - for not only being a wonderful, bad ass, protagonist, but for finally allowing me to fully embrace the world of role playing games. I have had an amazing time going on this journey with her, one I will surely repeat many times. I love her.
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ajramseyart · 2 months ago
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I played Dragon Age Veilguard...twice
First! Fuck Solas!! For real though, great character.
Second Davrin and Emmrich won my heart this round.
I'm going to ramble about this game for a min. I have played all the games since the very beginning way back 15 years ago. Was part of the fandom and made sooooo much fanart. So much. So deal with it for a min.
Spoilers below
I wish I romanced Emmrich second though because the whole lich thing was something I didnt want. I went through the whole rest of his quest thinking bioware was going to make me romance a skeleton and I didnt want that...also the age gap thing took me out as well after making an older Rook. It made me feel like my character was 20 years old, especially with the option to tell this 50+ year old man that my Rook is a virgin.............Anyway I really loved his character and story, he is my very close second fav to Davrin.
Davrin was sweet and really loved his quest. It really fit in well with the grey warden story and overall story. He ended up being my fav companion this time around.
Grey Wardens impressed me. I went into this game wanting nothing to do with the Wardens. Been there, done that. Probably boring like they were in inquisition and DA2. Boy was I wrong. I really enjoyed the Wardens. I played a warden my second play through and having characters say its nice to have a warden around much better with two wardens...and it just hit me in the feels. It made me yearn for origins again. Loved the whole dark age Romanesque-ish aesthetic. It just felt really really good. It felt like home.
Main quest was really good this time around. Gameplay was good. Loved playing reaper. That third act was something I have been waiting for in an rpg.
I wish Rook wasn't so agreeable and nice. Its okay for "friends" and "found family" to have to conflict and drama and not also agree on everything. It really made me miss Vivienne and Wynne.
In my second play through I picked all the stern and aggressive options just to add some grit to Rooks personality.
I felt like the only Inquisitor that mattered was an inquisitor that romanced Solas. The only question that mattered was if you romanced Solas...which really sucked. I purposely did default inquisitor on my second play through just so I could trick solas into the fade without her in front of her.
I was really hoping that my inquisitor would show up at the end and kill him. It was on my bingo card but no...
I really wish they didnt add the inquisitor. But thats just one girls opinion. Key word here, opinion.
I called the Varric thing early on after getting Lucanis. So happy I didnt romance that guy. Once I saw he was possessed, I said no. Fool me once bioware.
Any way the Varric thing was really sad, I cried. It hit hard even though I knew the entire game he was dead..its a common trope.
It was a fun game, pretty game. Not the best dragon age game. The most memorable thing about this game for me will be the main quest and normally its the characters and I just feel like the characters got the shaft. I really wish I could have interacted with them more. They had a lot of quests which is great but having the option to click on them just to say hi would have done wonders.
I will not be making fan art this time around. I just have no urge or inspiration to make any.
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lkblackham · 7 days ago
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Warning: this is an angst post about Dragon Age, EA, and the state of the corporate-driven art world in general. I totally get it if you're really over this. I am right there with you. But if you DO read, thanks. You're a peach and I love you.
To begin:
It looks like Dragon Age is done. BioWare has made it clear that the last patch is where they're leaving it. EA was disappointed with the player count, and I'm betting they're not going to greenlight a new entry in the series anytime soon. And that honestly breaks my battered 32-year-old fantasy artist heart.
So imma angst about it for a second because this is now a Dragon Age page and it's all I talk about on here, because honestly where else am I gonna angst about this.
As much as I gush about Veilguard on here, I am actually well aware of its flaws. Believe me, I *know* it's not perfect. When I got the art book, I saw just HOW FRIGGIN MUCH the team had planned for DA4 - and how much they had to cut to finish it, after 10 YEARS of development. I know about the absolute *hell* it went through, the massive number of team members that were fired or left the studio before it was finished, the ridiculous expectations and demands EA executives made that caused the studio to scrap everything and start over several times.
Knowing this, it's incredible that Veilguard is at least *intact* and *playable* and still has that Dragon Age personality (at least to me, personally - I understand why some people do not feel the same way, and that's perfectly valid) (and by valid I do not include the 'anti-woke' brigade, you can fuck right off my page if you're here for some strange reason).
THAT is what I gush about - that feeling is still there, even when it's not perfect and had a very troubled development.
This series has meant so much to me over the decades, and remains my favorite fantasy series, period, overall. It's my comfort place (rather weirdly, considering the blood, gore, and brood mothers) and also served as something of a social simulator for me when I was really young and had social anxiety so bad I literally couldn't say hi to people I knew in public. I was convinced I would do it wrong. So having these pre-constructed interactions with fictional characters that I could go back and redo if I wanted was really therapeutic.
I mean, I did go to actual therapy and take medication as well, but you know, this stuff is important, too.
The example I will always cite (and probably have already on this page but whatever) is Sten. Sten, in Origins, is the huge stoic badass warrior archetype, and I was constantly trying to earn his approval in the game. But I kept FAILING. He kept UN-HEARTING me. And I couldn't figure out why! I was saying all the nice dialogue options! I was agreeing with him on stuff! So what would it take to get some approval from this asshole?
I finally caved and looked up a guide. And I was floored to discover that, actually, Sten approves of you *when you stand up to him*. He wants you to have a backbone, even if it means disagreeing with him. He respects a strong leader who stands up for what they believe in, not a yes man trying to get him to like them.
This concept, the idea that even a *fictional character* like this could exist, was absolutely amazing to me. It sounds really dumb, but seriously, it actually shifted my thinking about how I talk to people and what they expect of me. It was a small shift, but it's still stuck with me all these years later. It's a testament to the power of stories, and how the interactive nature of games can tell stories in a way no other medium can.
I've had many other experiences with other games and books and movies and TV series like that since. But because of that effect it had at that time in my life, Dragon Age has a special place in my heart no other series does.
But... That's not the only reason I'm sad about the outcome with Veilguard. It's really only half the reason, actually.
The other half is my anger at the game development machine as a whole. We all know it. We've all watched it churn and grind several studios into pulp. We've seen big time studio execs - most of whom, these days, haven't ever actually worked in game design and probably don't even play games themselves - treat designers like garbage they can just throw away when they're done with them, or they don't perform their perceived function the way the execs want them to. (I know it's not just execs that do this, but they're certainly the central problem). These people are in charge, but they aren't artists or storytellers. They see things in terms of products and consumers, monetization schemes, player counts. They don't see the value in what they sell, beyond how much money they bring in.
There is a necessary place for people like this in any business, certainly, but they should never, ever, EVER be the ones in charge. If the past three decades have taught me anything, it is this. These people care about how much wealth they can hoard, and nothing else. We now live in a world where creativity is manufactured by an algorithm, because these people don't want to pay actual humans to do it. The value of artists and what they make is reduced purely to profit.
Don't get me wrong, as an artist myself I do like being able to make money. I certainly like being able to do what I do for a living. But I don't do it *just* to earn money. If that were the case, I would have just stuck with my job chopping vegetables at that deli in my hometown that paid way better and gave me health insurance (not that that's a shameful profession - I seriously would have stuck to that job if I had actual business brains). I do art because it's what I love and what I live for. Hell, I am making NO money from my art right now, but I still make it. Even when my projects fail, I still think they're important, and are worth investing in. I go back to those projects, get feedback, see what I can do better, and try again. I grow, and do better, and give those stories a chance to grow as well.
And that's what's missing from not only the games industry, but most creative industries now, at least on the market end: that understanding of art's inherent worth. That willingness to try again, and improve. Giving things a chance to grow, beyond just player counts and profit numbers.
That was what made Baldur's Gate 3 such a phenomenal success, from which (I think) competing studies took the wrong lesson. Larian worked on the game as a labor of love (as well as a labor of money) interacting with the people playing it, taking feedback, and incorporating their own passion for the project over and over again. They went the extra 1000 miles. They let the game grow and do better.
I'm not saying that Veilguard should have done that BG3 did. What I am saying is that it should have been given more of a chance to grow. As it is, right now, there is still potential to do better. But.... it's not getting that chance. It's the first Dragon Age game that isn't getting any DLC, no extra content, no other chances to expand upon the story. And, it looks like, the series as a whole might not be getting any more chances at all. Maybe I'm wrong - I might just be coming over all bitter and cynical (as only an unemployed artist with mountains of student debt can). I understand that BioWare might just be done with it after a friggin decade. But... it just feels unfair. And sad. At least for me.
It is just a game, at the end of the day. There will be other games, other products to consume. But. This product meant a lot to me. Art, of all kinds, means so much to me. And seeing the way art of any kind is treated now, but especially things like this... It hurts. A lot. And it keeps happening.
So. In order to combat that, lest I fall down a despair hole and never come out: I'm going to keep filling in holes. I'm going to make my OWN personal DLC.( Or, um. Just 'C', I guess.) Even if I can't code and model, I can write and draw and comic. I have my own stories in my own self indulgent fantasy worlds to tell, but I'm also going to keep adding to Dragon Age, at least in my own canon. Even if it doesn't mean anything to anyone else, it'll mean a lot to me. And I hope I'll get to see other people continue to make their own DA art and stories, as well as worlds of their own making. We need art - ALL art - right now, more than ever. Seriously.
As Andrew Wincott, the actor behind Raphael in Baldur's Gate 3, said: "Keep being creative. Keep making these worlds, and maybe one day we'll learn to protect the one we're in."
And that's me, angsted out. Thanks so much for reading. If you've made it this far, I have a gift for you:
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It's Varric's chest hair. One of my criticisms for Veilguard is that there is not nearly enough chest hair on anyone but particularly not on Varric, which I think might be an actual crime.
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housederiva · 29 days ago
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I must confess I didn't realise I could also get asks for my own ask game and I got a little overwhelmed after checking my inbox (in a good way), I hope you guys don't mind that I'm answering them all together! Here's the original list for anyone who wants to play along xx
I'm answering these for Rook (just Rook) de Rivia who I'm writing for in Facets of Determination and she's my primary Rook. A warning that its a little long under this here read more
🌻 How old is your Rook? How do they feel about celebrating their birthday? What gift has meant the most to them? Rook is most likely between 28 and 33 years old. Possibly younger, maybe older. It was hard to gauge her age when Viago first found her because of how malnourished she was. She also doesn't have a birthday so instead it's celebrated on the anniversary of when her former master was killed which the 10th of Harvestmere (the Thedas version of October) She would hate it if it were celebrating her birth itself and not her freedom Viago had given Rook a crocheted blanket that's one of those really intricate patterns that take months of continuous work to finish and just so happened to time the giving of it to the first year anniversary of that night. One very similar to it showed up in the Lighthouse soon after the group's arrival
🪻 What is the most painful injury your Rook has received? How has it affected them once it healed/scarred? You know when you're wearing a new pair of shoes that need to be broken in, and they dig into your heel and peel the skin away? Imagine that but in a near unbroken ring around both wrists from where shackles were fought against as a very small child. This happened for so long and with such intensity that the jutted out points on either wrist were worn down to the bone and tendons were sliced into There's also where her throat was slit that same night Viago and her met. Her former master attempted to use her as a human shield to stop Viago from killing him - it didn't work. Once he realized that, the man cut her throat in a bid for escape - that also didn't work. It's the most visible scar she has and the one people's eyes flick to before conversations are started. It doesn't ache when it rains the way her wrists do, but her voice still catches if she speaks too loudly, Rook still remembers what it was like to swallow her own blood as she drowned in it
🌹 What’s the first genuine fight Rook got in with their love interest about? How was it resolved? One of the only personal fights she ever gets in with Lucanis happens before they are officially in a relationship. It's going to be in Facets of Determination, but after the dragon attack on Treviso something happens where Rook gets injured by a Crow trying to betray de Riva in the chaos and Lucanis goes after the betrayer. When he pops back up at the Diamond, he finds a recovering Rook refusing to rest or leave for Minrathous until he comes back It's the kind of berating you give to someone you love dearly when they've scared you, when you think something terrible's happened to them. Her mind immediately went to the worst possible outcome, that she was being used as a lure so he would get separated from the rest of the Crows and then recaptured by the Venatori, and Rook wouldn't know where to go to even start looking for him This is a terrible time for an argument because of what just happened to Minrathous but it fizzles out the next morning when Rook goes into the kitchen for the cup of coffee Lucanis and her usually share before the rest of the group wakes up. He already has her cup filled when she opens the door. Spike calls out her name a little more enthusiastic than normal, a little more hopeful - nearly afraid it isn't here The second fight is sparked by him mentioning that she shouldn't trust Solas as much as she does and ah well that one ends very differently
🌸 Does your Rook have any siblings or close friends they see as such? Where are they during the events of Veilguard? Not every most Houses of the Antivan Crows see themselves as a family unless they're a branch like the Dellamorte's. De Riva is a house of practicality before it is blood. Rook was gifted to her former master as a very small child, she has no memory of siblings. There's Viago of course, who would deny Rook was anything other than his protege if one was to ask. Though there is no other Talon who worries about an individual Crow in an older brother way like he does. In my story, Chance Candide is Chance Candied de Riva (I realized I had a character who was literally just him but of her house so I just shoved them into one moustached man) They're the only two that were fledgling at the same time and of the same age who made it into being full fledged Crows that are still alive (there was a third but she died before veilguard). I have them written as sort of a happy foil of Lucanis and Illario Chance kept a necklace chain of Rook's that broke when they were out and about a week before she was sent away with Varric, he wears it like a bracelet and hasn't taken it off
🌾 If there was a demon trying to trap/take over Rook, what kind would be the most successful? What would break their hold? Resentment. She loves Viago. He's closest thing to family that she will ever have, but a part of her will always resent that she was made into a Crow instead of a servant at the de Riva estate or left to bleed out and die in Minrathous. The demon would say something along the lines of 'All you did was hand your leash from one shem to another. If you stay with me it would finally be in your own hands' and she would begin to crack. Two of the only things that could break their hold would be Spite calling out for her or Solas butting in if he were able to reach out from the prison Or it would be desire, masquerading as Lucanis in their little bakery hidden in a small town within the hills of Antiva no one's heard of
🌱 Was Rook involved romantically with anyone before Veilguard? What was their partner like? How did the relationship end? Rook is ace like Lucanis is and I think the only other romantic relationship she's had was with the third fledgling that made it to being a Crow I mentioned before. Viago had Rook kill her. Her name was Sylvia and she was as smart as she was deadly. Long dark cherry hair she wore in an intricate French braid that Rook would spend the mornings platting for her. There was a slight gap in her teeth and her smile was lopsided, the left side would tilt a fraction of the second before the right. She had far too much pride, too much unfounded hope. Syl thought that she could kill Viago, she thought she could dissolve de Riva altogether and her and Rook could get away, that the two of them would move to some a small village in the hills of Antiva no one's ever heard of and live. A small naive thought suited for fledglings that never make it to their first contract. Rook is the second best poisoner of her house, she specializes in assisted suicides but that doesn't mean it's the only kind of contract she takes. She has killed four other Crows at the behest of her betters, Sylvia was the first Rook never told Viago why she tried to betray them, he's never asked
🌼 If someone was to ask Spite what Rook smells like, what would he say? It feels like a copout to say lavender and honey cream but that's the answer. He wouldn't elaborate but Spite and Lucanis both know it's more of a medicinal lavender than a sweet one. It is the smell of the tea she brewed for her contracts. The honey cream masks any hint of the poison's bitterness within it that lulls them a gentle sleep which they don't wake from. The soaps she uses also smell like lavender and she mixes honey into her coffee (much to Lucanis' dismay)
🌷If Rook needed to get away from their responsibilities for a moment, where would they go? Where is their safe space outside the Lighthouse? De Rivas medicinal garden with their estate in Salle. The first time she was ever left unattended was there. The first moment in registered with her that she was now in control of her own movement was as well. However there is no eluvian which goes to Salle so the garden of an elderly woman who supplies specific Crows with specific ingredients for specific potions in Treviso suffices. She's kind, keeps to herself, and allows Rook free reign of the grounds. And despite her fear of drowning, Rook spends an awful lot of time down by the rockier points of Treviso's coastline
🥀 What figure from Rook’s personal past would be added to the regret prison? Sylvia
🪷 Does your Rook have an irrational phobia? (ie spiders or large man-made objects submerged underwater) See this one's fun because man-made objects submerged underwater is my personal phobia and I projected it onto Rook. She doesn't like seeing/being above collapsed bridges, she doesn't like sunken boats and she really doesn't like the Ossuary If I were going to give a rational one it would be the fear of drowning or claustrophobia
🍀 Has Rook had any near-death experiences? What went through their mind during what they thought was going to be their final moments? When Rook's throat was slit by her former master. She'll never forget the way it felt to have blood flow down the inside of her throat from halfway way down like that. She'll never forget the dull thudding of her head against the tile floor she was dropped or the way Viago exasperatedly mumbled out, 'oh not on my boots' when the blood began to pool or, more importantly, the way he applied pressure to her jugular and said with the first kindness she had ever received, 'that was rather careless of you' It was relief when the knife met her skin. That shifted into confusion when her master was dealt with and Viago pulled her into his lap. She wasn't a person, she wasn't worth saving and certainly not by a Crow
💐 What is the relationship Rook has with their faction mentor? What was the moment they sent Rook away like? I think I've answered it throughout the questions above but 'complicated' is the best way to describe what the two of them have. Viago's her big brother, her father figure, her Talon, her boss. He freed her, he turned her into a weapon. He leads her to the grassy field with leash in hand It was quiet - shameful, when she was sent away
🌺 Is there an object from Rook’s childhood they look back on fondly? (ie a favorite stuffed animal, book, or food) Rook never had a childhood. She was a slave and then she was a Crow, nothing else. But there was a moment after she was brought back to the inn Viago was staying out the night he got her and, Viago being roughly 20 years old and never having to deal with this sort of thing, had the kitchen staff make her a hot chocolate. That's her favourite drink and sometimes she'll just sit for a while holding a mug of it
🌿 Does your Rook have any tattoos? What was the moment when they got them like? If they’re a Crow where is their de Riva brand located? What vallaslin do they have/how did they earn it if they’re Dalish? She has her de Riva brand and while in there isn't an asset for it in game, I've personally decided that it's the wing that you can have on one of the arms. I think she would look at it with a mix of pride and disdain before meeting Lucanis and Spite and afterwards the meaning shifts into something different (to me this also means Viago has the same tattoo but of course that's a hc so ignore me) In game, it's implied that Rook got really drunk the night she became a Crow but since she's Viago's favourite I think he had her to build up an immunity to poisons including alcohol so it was more likely Chance and Sylvia got drunk and carted her around Salle untill Viago dragged the three of them home The moment Rook got the tattoo was actually pretty quiet. I'm fairly certain a Crow gets their brand once they've completed their first contract and are no longer a fledgling. Like I mentioned above, Rook deals with assisted suicides. When she said 'the Crows send their regards' for the first time and for most of the times afterwards, its said softly and with comfort. Not to unnerve or be dramatic. Her kill was sombre and the active getting the brand reflected that
🍂 What was it like the first time Rook killed someone? How did they react afterwards? She behaved as expected afterwards. With obediance and unwavering loaylty. It was about a year into Rook being a fledgling. She was testing the potency of her poisons and another de Riva fledlging, who was always kind to her, was testing their resilience. Rook's poison was stronger. Her first contract, however, can be read here
Thank you for taking the time to read this if you did! And thank you to everyone below for one or more of the asks in xx
@livingthedragonlife @rookinthecrownest @umbralaether @a-jynx @skeleton-ships @sternentreue @handsomeamoeba @onebadlich @cute-ellyna @gwinaesfer @chamtong @distinctivelibrarians @silent-words and @thelittletrinethatcould @themontess @lafaiette who stuck a flower down in the main post's comments xx
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nerd-fandom-drabbles · 3 months ago
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Paper Trail
Description: Lucanis wrestles with the possibility of betrayal as he delves into the mysteries surrounding his capture and subsequent disappearance. With Rook by his side, they piece together what few clues they have.
2461 Words
Characters: Lucanis Dellamorte and femme, elven Rook
Pairings: Lucanis x Rook, hint of potential Teia x Viago
Genre: Mystery???? Hurt and comfort.
Content Warnings: I'd rate this T for teen. Mostly for a few dirty words in English and Spanish and some adult themes. Adult themes: mentions of violence, betrayal, suspicion, sex. Spite being less of a physical gremlin and more of a voice in Lucanis's mind.
WARNING: Spoilers for all released Dragon Age: The Veilguard gameplay footage as of 10/26/24, The Wigmaker Job, and Eight Little Talons. Not necessary to have read the Tevinter Nights stories, though. I probably over-exposit for clarity.
Note: Probably will be OOC once the game comes out. Story details will probably be totally wrong, too.
Note 2: This is a part 1 of ???? If anyone actually reads it I might feel cute and write more.
Lucanis Dellamorte was tiring of sifting through papers. Although normally he was happy to compile and review intelligence dossiers or post-op status reports, today, he faced another beast entirely.
He sat at an old oak desk in Emmrich's library facing off against a tall stack of envelopes, the newest of which were freshly delivered. The twine bindings and wax seals all broken, their contents had been dumped out and arranged in some vague groupings for analysis. He had read through them all at least once already, but felt like he was missing something obvious. Exhaustion aside, he wasn't ready to stop digging for clues just yet.
He let out a big sigh.
His positioning in the room wasn't ideal and he knew he struggled to concentrate because of it. He would have preferred to be sitting with his back to a wall, as would be usual for him, but that wasn't currently possible due to the layout of Emmrich's furniture. It was already kind enough of Emmrich to let him use his space without a condition of said use being a complete reorganization of the room. So, he was instead situated as close to the door as he could be, relying on the sounds of footsteps, gait recognition, and the wide oak door's creaks to give away any potential intruders.
As a result, when he heard those familiar, soft-heeled footsteps make their way to the door, he already knew what to expect. Still, she opened the door ever-so-slowly and crossed the room quietly, maybe on tip-toes. Probably trying to surprise him.
“Boo!” she whispered, wrapping her arms around him and kissing his cheek, “Did I get you?”
“Ah, yes, mi amor.” He responded flatly, and softly stroked her arm, “You got me.”
“Lies,” she whispered in his ear, “What are you up to?”
“Tying together loose ends... or trying to, anyway.”
“Loose ends?” she asked and pulled away from him. He instantly missed her warmth.
She leaned against the desk now, pawing at his papers inquisitively.
“Old ship records. You're looking for details of your capture?”
“You know the one,” He leaned back in his chair, and met her eyes, now giving her his full attention.
And indeed she did. A year before they had met, Lucanis had been the target of a devastating kidnapping plot on his return voyage to Antiva from Tevinter. Venatori had surrounded and overrun his vessel, and with nowhere to escape, he was captured. He had spent nearly a year in their custody, subject to endless torture and experimentation in retaliation for the assassinations that earned him his moniker: “The Demon of Vyrantium.”
By the time Rook and Neve found him in his underwater prison, he had been saddled with more than a few extra demons of his own. One of them more literal than any of them could have expected.
She swallowed, “Hmm.”
“Months ago, when we were in Vyrantium looking for Zara, I went seeking the manifest of my ship from that night.”
“Alone? I would have come with you.”
“I... didn't entirely trust you yet.”
She wasn't hurt by this. Knowing everything he had been through, his caution was more than warranted. Still, she wished she could have joined him.
“Anyway, with the ship's captain having been killed in the attack, I went to the local port authority and asked for a copy of any documents. They said the ship I was on was with an independent trading company, and they'd inquire to the local merchant's guild.”
“And it took this long for them to get back to you?”
“It seems that particular ship had an incomplete record. It took months of back and forth between the three of us to confirm that some parts of the manifest simply did not exist.”
“Convenient.”
He shot her a knowing look of agreement. He gestured to the mountain of papers and envelopes on his desk, “This is the result of those exchanges.”
Her heart skipped a beat as his glance returned to her. The quiet intensity in his eyes never ceased to strike her.
“I've been scouring for clues, but... nothing stands out,” he said, rubbing his beard and leaning over his papers, “Any thoroughly incriminating evidence must have been among the redactions.”
“Still, there might be something they missed. Even a fake name or suspicious piece of cargo might be of interest to us,” Rook replied, and when Lucanis nodded, she then continued, “Have you shared this with Neve, yet? Following this sort of paper trail is her bread and butter.”
“Ah no, not yet,” Lucanis swallowed, “I wanted to reach a conclusion on my own before getting a second opinion.”
Rook sighed. She knew the real reason was that he was still sorting out who among the Veilguard he could trust. She had earned his good opinion through ceaseless dedication, honesty, and an uncanny ability to help him through his arguments with Spite. The hot, soul-bearing sex had probably helped, as well. The others on the Veilguard team, however, had presumably not been so lucky.
“Well, there is one thing. Something I expected to see that, conspicuously, wasn't there.”
“What?”
“I don't want to say. Not yet. Not until I'm sure.”
She sighed. This was a lot. “You know, your grandmother suspected that you were betrayed. By an ally.”
He stared blankly, “She said that? To you? When?”
“When Neve and I first met with Crows regarding your whereabouts. Before we met.” Rook fiddled with one of the pens on his desk, “She said it was why she didn't tell anyone about the fake body at your wake. She didn't know who to trust.”
“Mi amor. That is an important detail,” His forehead creased with frustration and he rubbed his furrowed brow, “Why didn't you mention it earlier?”
“I planned to tell you eventually, but I knew the rest of the Crows were looking into it and would report to you if they found anything. Besides, I didn’t want to add to your worries if there wasn’t anything you could do in the meantime.” She shook her head, “You had enough on your plate.”
“That is for me to decide, Rook. I know you were trying to protect me. But that was for me to decide.”
“I'm sorry. I... should have told you sooner.”
“I'm a big boy. Don't leave me in the dark.”
He could feel Spite weaving a sickly web in the back of his mind. She hides. She lies. And you think she loves you? He fought against the thoughts, knowing Spite's only interest was in isolating him further.
He met her pleading eyes and sighed; he was utterly unable to stay angry at her. “That changes things. She may have kept records of her thoughts on the matter somewhere... But where?”
The obvious place to look would be their ancestral home, however, this was Caterina they were talking about. She had kept a million secrets, and probably had a million different places to stash them. Plus, if Caterina had been correct, and the traitor was a close ally, it's possible they may have already been beaten to the punch, with any evidence destroyed or altered... But even if so, it was another lead.
He wondered briefly if she might have kept a safety deposit box in a bank vault somewhere. As next of kin, he would be able to get his hands on it, but anyone else would likely have more trouble. Anyone else except...
He thought for a moment, and then asked, “Who else knows about that little tidbit?”
“Uh, just those of us who were in the room, I assume.” She counted on her fingers, “Teia, Viago, Neve, and your cousin.”
“Illario?” He paled and she nodded, “Shit.”
“Why, what's wrong?” She paused in her tracks, blood running cool in her veins, “You suspect him.”
“He was supposed to be on that ship with me, but ran off on a 'job' last minute. If he bought a ticket, his name would have been on the manifest next to mine, but it wasn't. The page was ripped out.” He growled, “I know. Convenient.”
“Your own cousin? Luca, but why would he-?” She stopped, her mouth becoming dry, “Oh.”
“Oh?”
More secrets. Spite hissed.
“I've been... spending some casual friend time with Teia.”
He raised an eyebrow. This was news to him. Not good or bad. Just... news.
“What? She's fun! And I think when she and Viago finally hook up, they'll be great for double dates.”
He cracked the slightest hint of a smile. He actually liked that idea, even if the chances were slim. Those two were utterly hopeless.
“Anyway, she told me about your rivalry.”
“Rivalry? What rivalry? There is no rivalry.” At least, no more than any other set of boy-cousins around a similar age.
“She also told me you'd say that,” she chuckled dryly, “That Illario was always comparing himself to you but you always brushed it off.”
“What? No, that's a misreading of the situation,” he shook his head, “No, I was just older, and so he followed me around like a puppy.”
“Vhenan, I love you. But you are literally brushing it off right now,” he let out an annoyed little groan, and she continued, “You were Caterina's favorite. Everyone thinks you should be the heir. He's barely even a contender. He's jealous.”
He blinked. He had considered Illario a suspect, but hadn't been able to pin down a compelling motive. There had been conflicts in their past, over everything from jobs to girls, sure, but enough to collaborate with their enemies to take down family?
And jealousy? What even was a little jealousy among relatives, anyway? He was jealous of Illario's even bronze skin, ease with women, and ceaseless, grating charm, but he would never wish him harm over it. They were different, yes, but that was what made their friendship work.
Still, he was pulled back to the Wigmaker job. That entire night, Illario had seemed preoccupied with the possibility that Lucanis would be selected by Caterina to take on the role of First Talon in her stead. In fact, Illario had asked on one - no - two separate occasions, what Lucanis would do if she tapped him. In response, Lucanis had been honest and told him that he had no desire for the role, and would prefer Illario have it for himself. But he'd also been honest that Caterina could force him into it if she wanted to, and that they would need a plan to convince her to name Illario instead. And at the time, Lucanis had assumed that was enough to sate him.
But maybe he'd gotten impatient. Maybe he was more ambitious than Lucanis had given him credit for? Maybe he wanted his dear cousin out of the picture entirely?
Fuck off, Spite. I feel you in there. The entity merely cackled and retreated to the deeper parts of his sub-conscious, done stoking his fire, for now.
Truthfully, Illario was only a somewhat skilled stealth infiltrator, but he certainly had enough skill to break into a lightly-guarded private shipyard and alter the records unseen. If the Venatori had reached out to him and made him an offer... maybe let him in on the plan to get rid of their Demon problem...
The simmering in Lucanis's blood turned to a boil. That made motive, means, and opportunity. He gripped the armrests of his chair so hard he thought they might break. After a few tense moments, he bit his thumb and muttered under his breath, “Ay, ese mierdito. Imbécil. ¡Bastardo, coño!” He clenched his fist.
The air in the library was thick with silence. It wasn't a huge outburst; he'd hardly moved, but still, Rook was surprised. She didn't have to speak Antivan to know that he was angrier than she'd ever seen him. This was highly unusual, to say the least, and she wasn't sure what to do. It was far more common for her to have to pry his feelings out of him, or ply him with alcohol or affection to get him to emote at all. And even then, even with Spite's chiding haunting his waking thoughts, she'd never seen him so volatile. And yes, the circumstances were dire, but there were still so many unknowns.
“Luca, please. We don't know it was him.” She firmly placed her hand on the table and leaned towards him, “Besides, doesn't this all feel a little too easy? Anyone – anyone – could have requested copies of these documents. They're public record. Whoever did this knew we would get them eventually.”
“So?”
“So... The page was removed. His name might have been on it, but we can't know now. This could all be a frame job to tear you two apart when you need each other.”
He blinked hard, breathing heavy, slowly coming down from his rage.
“You're right. You're right. Thank you.” He took her hand and gave it a little kiss, “I'm sorry I-”
“We need more information,” she interrupted his apology. It wasn't necessary. Not from him. Not now. His rage, though perhaps momentarily misdirected, was perfectly valid in her eyes. And she knew that when the time was right, it would be useful.
He gave her hand a little rub with his thumb and then let it go. He took a deep breath. He fastened the nearest group of papers with a paper clip and set them down on the desk in a neat stack. He took another deep breath, firmly gripping the desk's edge. He needed to set aside his feelings and think clearly. Think. After a moment, he looked up at her.
“Let's set up a meeting with Teia and Viago. You, me and Neve. If we meet at Caterina's, we can kill two birds with one stone: go through her effects to see if we can dig up anything, and get a status report on anything they've uncovered through their investigations.”
“That's a good plan, Luca.”
He nodded. To anyone else, his expression might look neutral, but Rook knew him well enough by now to see the distress clearly on his face. Something about where he held his tension, probably. To be surrounded by so many enemies, and not know who to trust? Her heart sank for him. No wonder it had taken so long for him to open up to her.
“I hate seeing you like this, vhenan.” She reached out and placed a tender hand on his jaw. “Come.”
She pulled him into a warm embrace, and he melted into her, nuzzling into her neck as she snaked her arms around to stroke his hair and lower back.
“We will find who did this. I promise you."
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chaifootsteps · 3 months ago
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Hi Chai,
Since I know you are not a transmisogynist, what are some of your favorite transfem characters or characters you hc as transfem?
Btw this is the Malva anon again, I've been sending asks more than once but I realized I may be a regular asker now lol
GL with Bluesky
*Rubs hands eagerly*. Gladly! Let's talk about some ladies!
Rachel Bighead from Rocko's Modern Life
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My friend and I were watching this in VC the other night and Rachel's probably my favorite example of how to "trans" a character, especially one that's been around for a long time, right. Nothing about it feels shoehorned or asspulled or like it was done to appease a board somewhere. Ralph's defining characteristic throughout Rocko's original run was being absolutely miserable all the time, no matter how much success in life he achieved, and so when we learn that he went off soul searching and discovered Rachel was the answer? It made perfect, beautiful sense.
Rachel's just...amazing. She's dry as ever, but unflappably confident. She's Ralph at perfect peace, and the journey we see the Bighead family go on? Bev's immediate acceptance, Ed's tearful epiphany that that little tadpole who damaged his retina is still right in front of him, and the three of them hugging? God, this part of the special was so good. Rachel's so good.
Also, I ship her with Rocko like whoa.
2. Grell Sutcliffe from Black Butler
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I freaking love Grell. She's absolutely nuts, has an awesome design and a kickass weapon, and was surprisingly poignant and not-meanspirited considering the time period the show came out in. I love how the English dub has her give a kind of orgasmic bird squawk every time something goes right for her. 10/10, would support every last one of her woman's wrongs.
(Incidentally, Grell's one of the reasons it annoys me when people call me transmysogynist based off my opinions on Arcee, because let me tell you, I did my tour of duty back during the Grell Wars.)
3. Jerry/Daphne from Some Like it Hot
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First of all, this movie's amazing and if you haven't watched it and don't know the very famous ending, go remedy that right now. And then chase it with this fic. I'll wait.
I'm firmly in the camp that believes Jerry/Daphne is genderfluid, and holy cow, is this a lovely little story of self-discovery and falling in love. It's just so special to me. It makes me smile like a damn fool every single time.
4. Fem!Shep from Mass Effect
Okay, this one's kind of cheating because Shepards are customizable and can be anything you want, but I loved the idea from the get-go. That's in part because fem!Shep's model still moves like male!Shep, and it's especially noticeable when she sits, but it also just kind of feels fitting with a lot of the dialogue options. In conclusion, my Shepard was great and I need to replay that game with Legendary Edition because I miss her deeply.
5. Maevaris Tilani from Dragon Age
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Mae's wonderful on so many levels and she's a character I'm very excited to meet face-to-face in Veilguard. She's stunning, an absolute powerhouse, she's good friends with my my beloved Dorian, and her relationship with her late chubs hubby was beautiful. I'm pretty sure she's not going to be romanceable, but if she was, I think my Rook would be doomed.
6. Hana from Tokyo Godfathers
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This movie's a treasure and so is Hana. I like that she's old, she's stubbly, she doesn't pass flawlessly, but by god, if anyone deserves to be a mom, it's her.
7. Angel from Rent
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Another genderfluid character! At least, that's my best guess. I've always loved that we have no fucking clue exactly what flavor of genderqueer Angel is, that not even the cast seems unanimous on it.
I loved Rent when I was younger, thought it was so deep and profound, and it's kinda not but Angel was easily my favorite character. Still is.
8. The Laughing Cow and the Lactaid Cow
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They're cows that don't have udders and they're gay and in love, I don't make the rules.
9. Anode and Lug
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Transfem lesbian bots from RiD's (the comic run IDW Arcee is from) much more competently written sister series, they're a demonstration of how to do it right. I like that one transitioned medically and the other didn't. Anode features very prominently in my Arcee fix-it fic and I grew very attached to her while writing it.
10. Marco from Star vs. the Forces of Evil
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I'm gonna level with you, I never actually watched this show. But I was very invested in this one back in the day and disappointed when it never came true.
Honorable mention: Art the Clown from Terrifier
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While I don't exactly headcanon Art as transfem, there's a fic on ao3 that explored the idea and I kind of dug it. I could see Art much younger, with many possible futures laid out, and that being one of them. I think if something fundamental hadn't broken in his soul/brain, he would have been either trans or a fruity old drag queen, happy as a clam.
Mind you, this is all fanon talk. My jaw would hit the floor with horror if this became canon and Art would go straight on the pile of characters I get yelled at for "misgendering" because if I refuse to swallow rotten food.
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mrs-gauche · 5 months ago
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Vows & Vengeance Episode 1
ALRIGHT GUYS! As always, I'm super late to the party (although for once, I actually have a good reason, which is that I'm currently kinda in the middle of renovating my place lol), and while I first listened to the episode on Thursday, I just wanted to let it sink in a bit and listen to it again a few times, to really appreciate all the details. :D So here are a trillion few notes on the first episode (spoiler, I loved it! <3333) and I hope this doesn't sound too jumbled, I haven't had a lot of sleep lately. 😂😂💀💀
- Ok, so my first reaction to the ending was basically: "OH MY GOD NOTHING CAN EVER GO RIGHT", "DAMN THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY" and sobbing for Elio, I guess. lol
- My general thoughts: I loved it!! ❤️❤️❤️ I felt like it was gripping and immersive from the beginning, but also genuinely funny and moving at times! I think this first episode did a good job of setting up the plot, the pacing was good and I'm already invested in the new characters! The sound design and voice acting was top notch (albeit maybe a bit over the top and a little cheesy in a couple of scenes lol) and I absolutely LOVED the little nuggets of the Veilguard soundtrack we got throughout (Zimmer and Balfe confirmed!!). There are a few tiny nitpicks, but overall this was fantastic and correct me if I'm wrong, but I've never heard of a game being marketed with an audio drama before? 😂 But looking at Dragon Age's amazing voice cast (and the fact that they all made us develop a voice kink lmao), this makes so much sense and I need like a hundred more of these in the future. lol
Notes on the episode itself:
- The narrator reminds me so much of the ones in these old anime dubs. I was expecting him to be like "LAST TIME ON DRAGONBALL Z". He got lost in the wrong dragon franchise. lol Really cool voice though!
- I LOOVE how it starts off with a minute of just the ambient sounds, chatters and music of the tavern, to really get that immersion, as if you just walked into this place yourself. - That new rendition of "Oh Grey Warden" hit me in the feels ngl.. ;-;
- Nadia just walking it and poisoning Olen to get answers was such a badass introduction to our main character! - I like how the narrative is neatly tied together by making this a retelling of what happened, starting off with loads of questions and by the end we're back in the present again.
- Nadia and Elio are so sweet nawww <3333 - Those sounds of Elio waking Nadia up were straight up ASMR. lol - The tune that's playing in the back here is sooo nice, I wonder if it's part of the new Love theme or something. 🥹❤️
- A sort of forbidden love between Liberati and Altus, oh this better end f*cking well!! 💀💀💀 - Well, that birthday got cancelled REAL fast. lol - I get Nadia's outbreak, but DAMN, she went OFF on him from like 0 to 100 in a heartbeat. lmao I guess something was bottling up for quite some time. - "I'm sorry" Oh no. I notice a certain pattern. *sob* - Again, that track that's playing here, wooow. Goosebumps! It's a super tragic rendition of the main theme. I just know this one's gonna hit so hard whenever that plays in Veilguard. 😭
- I wonder if the docks here are the same we've seen in screenshots. :3 - The soundtrack that's playing here reminds me SO MUCH of Unravel (one of my favorite tracks in recent years! <3333) - I like Nadia and Vik's dynamic. Super authentic. :D
- Nadia's reaction to the gold and then "TRIPLE the bag for delivery??" Yeah, Solas truly is the richest apostate hobo in all of Thedas. Those vaults from Trespasser come in handy now. Good thing the currency of old Elvhenan is apparently still valid. lol - Solas' quest of collecting every ancient powerful artifact continues. - Isn't this like the second time now that Solas indirectly hired someone to break into the Archives? lol They really need to improve that security. (Watch there being a quest in Veilguard where you have to break in there again, but it's impossible due to the amounts of guards now and Solas is like "Yeah, that might be my fault, sorry." lol)
- Super random thought, but judging by the sound design, there's gotta be lots of chickens running around in the streets of Minrathous. lol - NEVE!! <3333 (I'm sorry to anyone who had the wildest conspiracy theories about that teaser image and was expecting someone else. lmao) - So, wait. Does that mean Solas also anticipated Neve to talk to Elio? Or maybe someone else was supposed to do that but Neve got there first? lol
- Nadia and Vik have got to be the noisiest thieves I've ever heard. LMAO HOW did you manage to steal anything until now?? 💀💀💀 - I love how you keep hearing Vik laughing in the distance while distracting the guards. lol
- I wonder if all the turmoil could have been avoided if they just informed Elio about his ancestor's connection to the Eye and the Venatori from the get go. I guess he needed that push of knowing to never be able to return to his life in Tevinter to go along with it, but.. *sigh* poor Elio. - "I trust you." UHGGHH We were on the right track there. 😭😭 - That music AGAIN?? Chilllls!! - Nadia just casually destroying hundreds of years worth of relics. Love it. lol - "FLAME BLAST!!" Oh, this is so anime. lmaoo - Elio going from "WE'RE NOT DOING THIS" to fully enjoying beating up templars and go full criminal in a matter of seconds as soon as he sees his girl in her element. He loves her so much. <33
- "Who's the hat?" lol - That groan after the Dread Wolf name drop? Yeah, that was actually me. lmao - So, I assume this also ties in with Neve already knowing about Solas and his shenanigans in Minrathous when she met Varric in The Missing. Maybe it was this very incident that Neve was talking about? - Noooo, Vik!! 😭😭 (I knew you for like five minutes, but you made in impact. lol) - Sooo... I take it these "assassins" were actually Venatori, since they were the ones going after the Eye in the first place? Or am I stupid now? - "The eye went boom!" Love that delivery. lol - "She's trying to freeze the bay!" Yeah, Neve just DID that. What a boss. - "An elf with a fancy tongue." Oh, I know who THAT is. lmao
- "Me and you." 😭😭😭😭 You two are killing me. - That motif AGAIN. 😭😭😭😭😭 - Oh, for fuck's SAKE. Solas really always has the best flippin timing. They're all sweet and loving and here goes our disaster man "I'm about to ruin this couple's day so good." 💀💀💀 It's her BIRTHDAY, dammit!! - "Ominous looking chap in the road" lmao All I could think of there was THIS (for anyone who gets the reference LMAO)
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- How is it that I knew he would appear in this episode from the teaser, and yet I still freaked out so hard. lmaoo After such a long time, it's like any second of new Solas content makes my heart skip a beat (or several). 😭😭 I still can't believe we're getting all this. 🥹
- Look, I may be a Solasmancer and have my biases, but godDAMN.. GDL is so good. HE IS SO GOOD. That Welsh accent. That rolling lilt. A voice like velvet that can be both so smooth and so sharp. There is just something about his performance that has you on the edge of your seat every time he's talking and I looove these little moments when you can so clearly hear that cheeky little smile in his voice. 💜
And it's so nice to hear him talk so calmly (well, at first at least lol) and kinda playful again, opposed to how super anxious he sounds at the beginning of Veilguard. 🥺 It's kinda interesting to compare this performance with DAI now, because now he's fully embracing the Dread Wolf role, and I keep thinking this is him after being isolated for the past ten years. ;-;
- Anway, so Nadia "unknowingly employed by the Dread Wolf" gets her pay from Richie Rich and girl, that would've been the moment to LEAVE. *sob* - "What other choice do we have?" Well, I dunno, RUN?? lmao - *chuckles* "I will demonstrate." Alright, I'm dead. Why did you say it like THAT? T_____T - Hearing Solas talk in elven after so long.. Dead again. Overkill. And yes, he's saying the exact same thing he said to Sera once. No, we don't know what it means. lol Maybe Sera IS actually an ancient magical artifact and he tried to trigger.. something. lol - That whole flippin dialogue. Solas please stop talking like an old witch trying to lure her prey into her lair. 💀 - "I do not play games." *screaming* - Honestly, I was like "NOOO WHY would you GO with himmm" but then I remembered, SHIT I WOULD FOLLOW HIM ANYWHERE. Hell, I *HAVE* followed him anywhere. To Hell and back. 💀💀💀💀💀 - Solas' persuasion game is at maximum at all times.
- "Energy is neither dark nor light." Speak for yourself, Trickster God of In Between. - "It is the Fade. The Veil is fragile here."
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- Solas finally gets to answer questions again, but Nadia is rude about it. 😂 Solas slightly approves AND disapproves. lol - "Kindly remove your blade from my neck."
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- Those damn Venatori at it AGAIN with their hunt for magical McGuffins. After TN and the Missing, I'm starting to believe that is all Solas did in the last ten years, snatching one deadly toy out of the their hands after another. lmao - "And it is up to me to ensure we arrive at the best possible outcome." Oh, we're so doomed. - "You're sharper than you let on." Here we go again with the backhanded compliments. lol Ohhh, how I missed it.
"Some people confuse a reckoning as an ending." "I seek... regeneration."
Holy shit. The voice. The long pause. The delivery of that last line. Shivers down my spine. It feels eerie. Like he sounds.. desperate.. and maybe a little.. insane? lmao (That's how you start to talk if you've been separated from your soulmate for ten years 💔💔💔)
Ok look, I've seen a TON of people thinking that, because of the way he says this and him using the word "reckoning" ("For a reckoning that will shake the very heavens"), this HAS to be whatever part he took of Mythal speaking now that has taken over his mind or something. But.. I don't think so? lol
I honestly think this is just Solas who, after a thousand years of preparing to "heal" the world again that he broke, even after admitting to himself that this world and its people are in fact real and he has to destroy it, is SO close to getting there now and there's NO ONE who could possibly understand him or how he truly feels or what any of this or the Blights/Titans/spirits/gods/Veil even truly ARE, so no WONDER he sounds a little f*cking unhinged. 💀💀💀
The choice of words is very interesting though.. "Regeneration" is not something he has ever used, BUT it immediately made me think of the line "But still, some hope remains for restoration" in Trespasser. This is what google tells me:
Regeneration represents a form of upgrade from restoration. If restoration means “to make something well again,” regeneration, for some authors, means “to make it better” than a (supposed) origin condition.
Regeneration: "a renewal or restoration of a body, bodily part, or biological system (such as a forest) after injury or as a normal process/ or a spiritual renewal or revival"
You know.. if I read "restoration of a bodily part or biological system", you know what's the first thing that comes to my mind yet AGAIN.
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Look, that Titan's body is SPLIT IN HALF and we know that this was kinda the catalyst for everything Solas did back then, so... I'll just leave that here and listen to rest of the episode now. lmaoo
- "And the eye will make us fix that?" "More or less." dksdjjgdkfvlf THE SMILE IN HIS VOICE. What does that even MEAN? What do you MEEEAN, SIR?? I would've RUN out of that cave SO flippin FAST. - "And you're sure this is safe?" "As safe as we make it." *literally two minutes later* "SOLAS, SOMETHING IS WROOONG!!" This is a goddamn comedy show. lmaoo - "Silence, please." lol at him still being polite. - "This is all to be expected!" *five seconds later* "WE MUST FLEE!" I BUST out laughing. WHY are you such a DISASTER. Nothing EVER goes right and yet you always keep trying, you fool, omg!! - I don't think we have ever heard Solas so distressed. lol Like, not even when Wisdom died or at the beginning of Veilguard. - "Take my hand!" I would've never thought to hear THAT Trespasser line repeated under those circumstances, but here we are. lmaooo - We know Solas is a hopeless romantic, so for him to see that sweet couple torn apart because of him, and him still trying to save Nadia, I'm not ok. - Solas being responsible for Elio getting banished to the Fade and him being trapped there not long after.. Do you believe in karma? 😂 - "I'M SORRY!" WHY DOES IT ALWAYS END WITH HIM SAYING THAT. 😭
- So.. uh... what even WAS the plan, exactly? lol Like, what was supposed to happen?? Maybe they should've asked a few more questions after all. 💀 - That following scene with Nadia all alone. I got chills again. That hit different. ;-;
- "Where can I find this wolf??" Oh, she is about to hunt him down. 😶 "...I'll be back." Nadia in full Terminator mode now. 😂 - How are she and Elio connected now though? How can she hear him? 🥺 And I can't help but think about whoever was left in the Fade in DAI again, too. 😭😭😭 - Not the credits making me almost sob AGAIN because of the music. 😭 It is so so good.
So there we are. Everything went wrong, a couple is doomed and Solas is sorry. So, nothing changed. LMAO Everything as usual. 💀💀💀 Solas, I swear, if you don't get these two back together again and pay Lavellan a visit afterwards, my Rook might rethink listening to your advice in Veilguard. lmao
I can't wait for that next episode! This was so much fun and an amazing start, and I'm so excited to hear all the other companions! :D ❤️❤️❤️
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catofadifferentcolor · 5 months ago
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Terrible Fic Idea #91: Modern Girl in Thedas, but make it DA2
In honor of DA:V coming out next month I've been replaying DA:I. This is something of a trial because, having just finished a Hogwarts Legacy replay, it's easy to tell that this game is 10 years old - that, and I loved how focused and intimate DA2 feels. Yes, it has world-spanning implications, but it's really all about this guy trying to do his best by his friends and his family. I love it, and DA:I never inspired the same kind of feels.
All of which is a long way of saying: I got to thinking about that most famous of tropes, Modern Girl in Thedas, and I thought about how would I handle it?
Or: What if the MGiT were to appear in Kirkwall shortly before the Fifth Blight?
aka the Thedas is Not Enough fic
Just imagine it:
Rather than a true self-insert, I see this more as modern woman meets Thedas, with a middle-aged fan of the Dragon Age series waking up in the body of an unnamed background character in a Hightown estate sometime in early 9:30 following a severe illness. The keyword here is fan - the SI has played the games, read the fic, and glanced at the wiki, but couldn't write out a clear timeline or recall most codex entries.
The SI eventually learns that she's woken up in the body of Sofia Vidal, the 15-year-old daughter of the richest merchant in Kirkwall. Their family has a virtual monopoly on cloth trade on the northern cost of the Waking Sea and has distant ties to Orlesian Nobility as well as the Amells. Their Hightown estate abuts the future Hawke Estate, and if the term robber baron existed in Thedas it would probably apply to here them.
Now, going from the body of a middle-aged engineer from the modern world into the body of a teenager in a Medieval fantasy world is difficult... but luckily no one seems to notice, because it seems doubtful that anyone has ever noticed Sofia Vidal in her life, her family included. She was mousy and shy and easily startled and apparently an endless disappointment to the family for being more fond of books than hunting or fighting.
Because, as Sofia soon discovers, the Vidal family has aspirations. They can read the writing on the wall with regards to the current Viscount and are willing to go to any end to have their family be named the viscountcy.
To which end: Sofia is the youngest of seven children. Three died in the cradle or soon after. Her oldest brother - Gaspare, her senior by nearly twenty years - spends most of his time in Orlais with his titled wife, running the family business interests there. Their other two living siblings are mages, with Amalia sent to the Kirkwall Circle while her twin Agnese went to the Circle at Dairsmuid. It had been their father's hope that, should they not be able to secure the viscountcy themselves, one of his children could marry into the line... but Sofia is so unlikely to catch anyone's eye that her father despairs of her ever marrying at all.
All of which brings us back to the events of DA2.
Sofia may not know much, but she knows that the Blight is coming. She also knows that the conditions in Darktown are horrendous and only about to get worse as refugees flood the cities, so she buys a book on healing, collects some herbs, and sets up shop on the opposite side of Darktown from where Anders had his clinic. It's better than sitting around the estate all day and makes her feel like her transmigration has a purpose.
The events of canon proceed apace...
...which is something of a surprise, because for a long while it's quite easy for Sofia to forget that she's in a video game world at all. That is, until Anders appears at her door looking to swap healing recipes, trade potions, and - eventually - share a drink at the end of the day.
It's through Anders that she meets Garrett Hawke - a cheerfully sarcastic force mage of breathtaking power. He's the sort of powerful it would be easy to fear if he wasn't so affable and in control of his gifts. The idea that he could probably take over Kirkwall through sheer power of his magic and personality alone never seems to occur to him - which is good, because he could probably be DA's answer to Alexander the Great if he cared to try.
Sofia doesn't join the Kirkwall crew, however. She does her healing, gleefully watches their antics from the sidelines, and occasionally joins them for a drink at the Hanged Man.
Though she is the first to welcome the Hawkes to Hightown at the end of Act I, becoming quite close with Leandra. (For many years Leandra will harbor the hope that Sofia and her son will marry and give her many grandchildren to dote over, but neither are inclined that way. Especially after it's revealed they're third cousins.)
Sofia turns 19 in 9:34, the year Hawke becomes Champion.
It's also the year Sofia is introduced to Sebastian Vael, being dragged out of bed in the middle of the night to attend the prince, who is bleeding out in the foyer of Hawke's home following the events of Repentance. It's not the first time this has happened - Sofia's bedroom is infinitely closer than Ander's clinic - but it is perhaps the most embarrassing.
Embarrassing, because she prefers not to be introduced to royalty in her nightclothes. Sofia has standards - not many, mind, but she has them.
Luckily for her, Sebastian is far too out of it to recall what she was wearing. But he can't help but develop a crush on the kind healer who so diligently tended his wounds - one who also ministers to the poor and downtrodden, though she could easily choose to live a life of luxury.
What follows falls somewhere between the canon friend and rival romances. We get a Sebastian who wants to regain Starkhaven because Sofia deserves no less than a Prince but who has the calm and pro-mage sympathies of the friendship route.
But that of course takes time, because Sofia's not convinced at first that Sebastian's crush has nothing to do with seeing her in her nightclothes. (Nor, for that matter, does she particularly care for the idea of a chaste marriage or an aggressively anti-mage spouse. She'd not been a particular fan of Sebastian in the game, but hadn't hated him either.)
Canon proceeds apace. Hawke becomes Champion, Kirkwall is left without a viscount, and Sofia's father tries to marry her off to however looks most likely to succeed Dumar this week.
As the chaos mounts, the soft, slow romance between Sofia and Sebastian is a breath of fresh air. On Sebastian's part, it grows from a seed of fondness - and, yes, lust - to genuine affection as he gets to know Sofia. For her part, by the time Sofia realizes she cares for Sebastian she's already in deep. Its friendship turned to love, which is the best and strongest.
They wed in a small ceremony in 9:36, only telling Sofia's father after the fact. As Sebastian has to leave the Chantry to do so, they're forced to camp out at Hawke's estate for several weeks before finding a small place of their own. This is awkward - mostly because the Vidal estate right next door and Sofia's father is a pompous ass on the best of days.
As the calendar turns to 9:37, matters reach their tipping point. Anders blows up the Kirkwall Chantry and Hawke is forced to kill him in hopes of restoring order. This fails and events of the endgame play out with Hawke siding with the mages.
Hawke goes on the run, helping mages across the Free Marches get to safety.
Sebastian makes good on his promise of taking back Starkhaven for Sofia, making her a princess in truth. The city becomes a sanctuary district for many of the mages in northern Thedas, much as Redcliffe was for the mages in the south. This doesn't prevent the events of DA:I, but halves the numbers of conscripts available for Alexius to conscript later. They send forces to help Kirkwall rebuild... but the city is still lawless and in turmoil when the Conclave occurs in 9:40.
Per Sofia's urging, Sebastian helps the Inquisition in its early days... though she does make it clear that she thinks the Inquisition's only aim should be to close the Breach.
But for the most part Sebastian and Sofia end up living fairly happily in Starkhaven. They have a larger family than Sofia ever imagined herself wanting - 5 kids, but magical epidurals are a wonderful thing. It's not a utopia, but it's the best that can be expected given the politics of the time. Their eldest succeeds their father as Prince of Starkhaven while their next oldest, not to be outdone, eventually gets themselves named Viscount of Kirkwall - just as the Vidal family had always dreamed.
Bonuses include:
Sofia becoming deeply, deeply over-invested in the relationship between Hawke and Fenris. So much so that for a while Sebastian thinks she's interested in one or the other or both and resolves to let her pursue her happiness without any interference from him, only to have it knocked into his head by a third-party that Sofia doesn't want be with them, she wants them to be with each other. This should be played for maximum humor and confusion.
An exceptionally complicated relationship with the Chantry. Sebastian is very much a committed Andrastian, whereas Sofia was agnostic at best in the modern world. Are demons and magic and the Breech proof that the Maker exists? Should she follow the rituals of the religion for Sebastian's sake or be honest about her beliefs? Can she open her mind enough to give Andrastianism an honest try? &c.
Sofia coming to view Leandra as second mother. Though she tries her best to prevent the events of All That Remains, she's not a fighter. All she's able to do is injure Quentin and alert Hawke to the problem sooner; Leandra still dies, but it's before Quentin is able to reanimate his perfect bride.
An engineer being forced to come to terms with magic. It makes the transition to a world at Middle Ages level of scientific advancement easier than it otherwise would be (magically running water!) but still makes Sofia's basic knowledge of germ theory a great leap forward in her Darktown clinic; and
Sofia gaining a reputation for being a great storyteller by blatantly stealing stories from the modern world to entertain children at her clinic. Varric eventually "borrows" some of these ideas and ends up writing the DA version of Harry Potter set in a fictional Circle in the years leading up to the mage rebellion.
And that is surprisingly more than I had. To be frank, the Sebastian romance snuck up on me because it's not one I usually go for, but the muse wants what it wants. As always, feel free to adopt this bun - just link back if you do anything with it.
More DA Ideas | More SI Ideas | More Terrible Fic Ideas
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feralcatalyst · 1 month ago
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Do you have any tips for drawing?
Never stop. Just keep drawing. No matter what your evil brainworms whisper in your ear, no matter what the public or the internet says about it, no matter what you do, do not stop. Take breaks, of course, stretch and refresh yourself with water, but never GIVE UP on drawing. The more you do it, the more you study and watch and learn and the more time you spend actually drawing, the more progress you will make. Hitting a wall? Does what you draw look bad to you? That's GREAT!!! Study what you made, and figure out WHAT and WHY it looks bad to you. Are the eyes wonky? Get to the grindstone and study different styles of eyes, from toony, to realistic, find something that looks and feels good to you, and practice practice practice. Is the hand looking off? Look at your own hand! Look at hands other people have drawn, study and watch and learn and replicate, even tracing and reference is okay so long as credit is given when and where necessary! As long as you are taking steps to learn what you are doing *wrong* then eventually you will find solutions and ways to make them look right! It may take you days, weeks, months, even years, but if you never give up, you will eventually continue improving. My personal art history below the cut for context, I hope it helps and brings some form of inspiration to everyone, even non-artists trying to learn or get into hobbies or new skills <3
I've been drawing ever since I could hold a pencil, so let's say since I was about 2. No one taught me how to draw, as I aged I started to notice that things were 'wrong' with my art and I would work to fix them. I realized very early that most animals don't have 4 legs on one side, so I'd draw two legs and add the "missing" two behind them, I saw the sun did NOT in fact wear sunglasses or have a face so I stopped with that childhood trope, I drew and drew and drew the things I loved the things I wanted the things I found beautiful cool or mysterious. (Dragons and yoshi's...) I was easily the best artist in my elementary school and I won some award for a recycling calendar our whole grade submitted art to.
I started growing up into a cringe teen that loved wolves and anime and emo skater aesthetic. My focus went from free-handing art to learning to do "real" practiced and professional style art, IE sketching the drawing in pencil and then lining it in ink, and then coloring it with colored pencils. I got my first drawing tablet around 13, when i was also old enough to join deviantart. I made fanart for everyone that reached out to talk to me, I drew characters I wasn't used to drawing, I wanted to make people happy so I drew and drew and drew for my friends and artists I looked up to. I started drawing fanart of my favorite tv shows, I dabbled more and more into digital art and I was BAD but I kept at it. I didn't let my mediocrity stop me. I knew I would never get better if I didn't at least TRY. There are no failures in art, only happy accidents. The only time you 'fail' is when you refuse to stop trying. But you can pick the hobby/job/skill back up whenever you ARE ready to try again. It's never lost to you.
Then I got into a car accident at 16. I had a concussion and a traumatic brain injury. I was injured severely enough that I had to relearn how to do… Well almost everything. I had trouble walking, speaking, playing games, and worst of all for me at least, drawing. I couldn't do it anymore. The wires in my brain weren't bridging the right connections anymore, trying to draw was like trying to speak a different language and no matter how hard I tried everything I had in me was just…. gone. I had to start from scratch, a blank slate but this time I had everything going against me, a brain that struggled to remember retain information and learn, and a body that struggled to move and react as I intended. I was so depressed, it took almost a year to get back on some semblance of improvement, and just as I stubbornly refused to stop drawing, I stubbornly forged my path forward. I got into a new fandom, started seriously practicing the human form since before then I'd only focused on animals and fantasy creatures. Yeah I sucked, my anatomy was shit, my understanding of the body the facial expressions perspective it was all off. But I kept doing it.
I started drawing smut when I was 18, it helped me immensely in practicing how bodies could interact, what made poses or people feel rough or stiff, I studied porn and cgi and famous smut artists, i took time to learn what I liked about it, what was right but looked wrong, what was wrong but looked right, how light and textures were supposed to look, I had no obligation to improve I just wanted to. I had striven to keep going and make small steps in the right direction, taking time to study all my old pieces and figure out WHY they were bad, all the things that were WRONG, how how I could edit or fix the issues to a point where I would deem it acceptable. I never deleted any 'finished' works. I can still access my art from when I was a cringe tween, I can see my mistakes from every year I was active on the internet. I also did my best to not self deprecate, I would objectively critique my abilities and pieces and not take any feedback negatively no matter how harsh or scathing it may be. If someone had a strong enough opinion to voice it then I should have a strong enough backbone to listen and hear them out.
I started taking commissions once I felt comfortable in myself and my abilities. I never turned a commission idea down (Unless it was genuinely unethical) and used every opportunity to give MY BEST to my clients. Even if it was content I did not enjoy or characters with complicated designs or anatomy, I vowed to TRY and give my best and if I didn't know how to do or convey something I studied whatever it was until I felt confident enough in my understanding and embraced the challenges as they came. Study, learn, draw, reflect, redraw, rinse and repeat. Never give up. Try new styles. Try new mediums. Just keep trying! Do and do and do and see and watch and study and keep going.
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rook-laidir · 1 month ago
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That’s right, another Rook blog!
Open to RP with any characters from the Dragon Age series!
Check under the cut for RP stuff
Name: Osha “Rook” Laidir
Pronouns: they/them
Sexuality: Lesbian
Race: Elf
Class: Rogue
Faction: Lord of Fortune
Backstory:
When Rook’s mother learned that she was with child, fear consumed her. As an elvhen slave in Tevinter, she knew the kind of life her child would have. She prayed to the Creators that her father’s human heritage would be enough to protect them. But when Osha came out with pointy ears and no magic, she knew she had to run. She escaped with her child to Rivain, where they lived for over a decade. The slave owner, however, had a grudge and tracked them down, killing Rook’s mother and taking Rook back as payment. Rook worked as a galley slave for a number of years before making their escape once more, finding their way back to Rivain and joining up with the Lords of Fortune. But when one job went wrong and politics got involved, Isabela decided to “invite” (sentence) Rook to work with an old friend and stop a ritual. Rook had no idea what was in store for them…
Personality: Purple Rook. Always sarcastic and eager to get a good punch or three in. Talks a big game, but is a softie underneath it all. Cares about their friends more than anything. Knows they’re nowhere near the hero Thedas needs them to be, but they’re the one who’s trying, so that has to count for something, right?
Rules:
1. This is a sideblog, I can’t follow back
2. Semi-selective, but feel free to shoot me a DM if you wanna RP
3. Muse is 21+ and smut is welcome (and often encouraged, depending on how freaky we’re feeling)
4. My canon romance is Neve but I’m happy to explore romances with other women or non-binary characters. Bro-shipping with da boiz is always fun too, though
5. If I say or do something that makes you uncomfortable TELL ME and I will immediately edit/delete it. I just ask for the same treatment in return
6. I’m cool with rp’ing across the games, but I’m admittedly not huge on rp’ing with other OC’s or PC’s (hypocritical, I know.). That being said, if you wanna shoot your shot with your Hawke, Warden, or Inky, I’m down to talk about it
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rennorthernlights · 1 year ago
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The World We Knew
Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4: Snakes In The Garden,
Warnings: The depictions of the priest are not at all an embodiment of other priests and Christian. Implied grooming, Creepy older dudes being weird around KidReader, Nothing happens to the KidReader though, Zombies, Mentions of minor character death, Sexism towards woman, Zombie apocalypse brings out the worst
Backstory to get a better insight about Issac and Radio girl’s first group. (Radio girl being Reader)
She remembers the day she went to church for the first time. An impressionable age of 10 years old. Her mother made her father swore that if they ever had children that they should be allowed to choose their faith. Her father, a devout Christian, agreed to her mothers, an atheist in every sense of the word, request.
Granted her father tried to persuade his daughter to go to church, she just never wanted to go. That is until her father made Captain in the police department. His church was holding a celebration for her father’s honorable work. The people were nice and even though she hated being forced into a frilly dress that her mother picked out. She’d much rather watch Kim Possible or maybe Dragon Ball Z but at least Sunday school was fun.
Some of the kids even made her laugh and she sorta had a lil crush on one of the boys too… much to the teasing and amused smile her mother gave her. “Alright now, lil lady church is starting.” Her mom said as she waved goodbye to the cute looking boy. Sitting in the hard pews as she had half a mind to fall asleep that is until the robe looking dude walked up to the wooden thing. Tugging on her mom’s sleeve to ask her who and what that is. “That man is a priest. Father Abraham Norton and that’s a pulpit.” An O on her face as she nods and looks to him.
They say that children can understand an adult far better than an adult could. Something about being able to clock when something just ain’t right. That tiny, small feeling of something most would miss.
The beady eyes of the priest is what set her off. Not her fault since she was always the best at games like I Spy and Hide-and-Go-Seek. He was off… so to speak, at least about the way the man looked. “Like a snake,” her brows furrowed as her mom pinches her elbow to be quiet and to listen. She couldn’t shake how much of a snake he looked like to her. Blame all the zoo books she got for Christmas.
The way his tongue rolled on S’s and the eyes the man had. Like they were searching for something. “Good morning, my lambs.” The man says with a soft smile. Eyeing the crowd and she shakes her head of nerves when his eyes land on her for a bit. “Now I know we are celebrating and honoring our new appointed Captain but there is something that I must say.” His shoulders fall as he looks sad but almost forced, like when she gets caught taking another cookie when she’s not supposed to.
She looks to her mom but her mother just tilts her head motions for her to keep listening. “I have come to ask for forgiveness.” Some people gasp in the congregation. The Father continues, “20 years ago, I gave in to the sins of desire for a woman. I was seduced by the way she looked, and I couldn’t stop myself.” His brows creasing as he places a hand on his chest.
Her dads eyes widen and then narrow, like he’s calculating. His thumb tapping against his thigh as he always does when he’s recalling something. Until it stops. “If we were back in the old days then I would gladly pluck out my eyes. I’ve found out recently that I have a son. A man that is now 22 years old named, Issac.” He extends his hand, and a man stands. Tall, light skin, brown hair and green, beady eyes. The same as his father.
“A fitting name, Issac Norton-Cortes,” her father grasps her mothers hand and they stare at each other. Wordlessly speaking as the Fatherspeaks solemnly. “Unfortunately, Issac’s mother has passed from unforeseen events. Her last wish was for Issac to be joining our church to help out so please… bare no ill will towards him. It is not his fault that his mother seduced me. He is innocent in his creation that was formed by sinful lust.”
The priest is still speaking as her mother taps her hand, and she looks confused before her mom says, “We are leaving. Now.”
Standing up and walking out as her father has a distant look, a thundering storm raging in his eyes. Being sent up to her room as she doesn’t understand why her mom and dad wanted to suddenly leave. Her dad loves going to church, makes an effort to always have Sunday off. Her dad was about to be celebrated or something like that. So she couldn’t understand why they’d want to leave. Why is her dad so… strange right now?
Tip toeing out of her room as she overhears her parents speaking softly, “-other is Elizabeth Norten. I knew her, Maria. She wasn’t seductive or would ever do something like that. She was just barely 18! Now I know why she suddenly forced to leave.”
“Jamie you can’t mean…”
“Look, she… Elizabeth was troubled, got into fights, did some smoking but she’d never... She would’t.” Her father sounds… upset and angry. “For years I wondered what happened. Her parents never told me.
“Sounds like you really knew her.” Her mother says softly. Her brows turned upward as she’s never seen her husband look so. So distraught before. “Was she your friend?” A tentative ask.
“She…” he sighs, “she helped me out a lot with my dad. Sure, she was a bad influence sometimes, but she stuck up for me whenever I came in with a new bruise from my old man.” She moves closer to get a better look over parents as they look sad. Her mother holding her father in a tight embrace.
Whispering words that she can’t hear as her mom rubs a hand on her dads back. “Her parents brought her to Father Abraham to see if he could help. She wasn’t the same after the first week that she’d have confessionals. She became more and more quiet. Wearing hoodies and always being covered.” His voice breaks.
The realization of it comes crashing down on him nearly 22 years later. “If I’d known… If I had just taken a closer look… I didn’t even reach out to her.” Tears forming in her fathers eyes and the man rarely cries. “How did I not think that it was suspicious?” He remembers how Elizabeth’s parents suddenly disowned her. A crushing guilt in his chest. Her mother says nothing but just holds him to her. “No one knew why… until now.” He glares hard at the floor.
From then on, they’d barely go back to that church. Making up a reason to be excused as the priest smiles assuredly. She was always around her mother since she wouldn’t let her little girl out of her sight. Getting tired of it like children do with overbearing parents. She decided that to sneak away to play with the other kids.
Playing soccer with the kids until she gets tired of it. Can only kick a ball so much before boredom creeps in. She spots the Churches garden and voice in her head to not go in but against her better thought she goes in. Her eyes widening as the garden looks well cared for. Different plants and even some trees. She grins as she crouches near one of the plots. Her hands digging into the soil.
“Hello there,” a voice calls out as she sits with her knees on the dirt, playing with the rolly pollys. The other kids laughing in the background, most likely still playing soccer. She tenses and moves to look at whose is speaking. Green eyes and a wide grin, something that supposed to be kind yet for her 10 year old mind… she doesn’t feel okay.
“All by your lonesome in the garden? Where’s your parents?” He looks around before he steps forward. “My names Issac and you are?”
“My mommy and daddy says I’m not supposed to talk to strangers.” She tells him shyly as she stands up. Her feet shuffle close.
The man grins and he holds out his hand, “That’s very smart. You’re a very smart girl, aren’t you?” He laughs like it’s the funniest thing in the world, “Well my name is Issac.” Grabbing her hand and shaking it. “No longer strangers, see? I bet your name is Eve. A pretty name for a pretty girl.”
Confusion evident on her face at the name, “My names not Ev-“
A voice cuts through the garden making both of them look towards the person speaking. “There you are! Where have you been I’ve been calling you for an hour.” Her mother spots her and rounds the corner faster as she spots Issac. The man grips her hand harder as she tugs back. Finally letting go when her mother places a hand on her shoulders. Her eyes narrowing as she holds her hand out for her little girl to hold onto.
“Gotta be more vigilant with your lil girl. Almost snatched her up,” he laughs but something in his eyes isn’t playful. Her mother pushes her behind her as she smiles far too sweetly. He continues speaking as he looks down at her and not her mother, “She’s a pretty thing too. She’ll make all the boys fawn over her especially at her age right now.”
The smile on her mothers face drops as she glares at him. “10 year old girls shouldn’t have to worry about boys. Stay away from my daughter.” Her tone tight as she moves her and her daughter along as he smiles wide.
As soon as they were closer to her father her mother told her to not speak to Issac again. That the man is up to no good especially since he’s talking to a 10 year old girl like that. Her mom can’t prove it but that man… that man is not a good man. She just knows it. Her mom has never been wrong about people before.
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She groans awake. Her hands clenching and unclenching as her eyes blink. “Finally awake, my Eve?” She shivers with disgust at the nickname. Eve, it’s what he called her on the day they first met, and he’s been calling her that ever since. No matter how many times she tells him that’s not her name. Her head pounding as she tries to remember what happened. Her hand moving to massage her head, but she finds that she can’t move them. “Your head hurt, Eve? Sorry I was so rough with you.” The fake worry in his tone doesn’t go unnoticed by her as she glares. “Shouldn’t fight your husband next time.”
“We ain’t married, Issac.” Glaring at him hotly as she struggles in the binds. “You’re not my husband and I ain’t your damn wife!”
“Oh, silly me,” he laughs that stupid noise. All nasally and all teeth, “How presumptuous of me. We never did consummate on our wedding night.” Her glare hardens as she remembers all too well that night and the days before that lead up to it.
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She’s been on her own for a couple weeks. Given up hope that her parents are alive. Both aren’t answering their phones and when she went to where her mom worked it was already overrun with dead children and screaming teachers. Her father was one of the first responders to downtown Houston…. They don’t call that place a Dead-zone for nothing now days. It’s a miracle she even made it this far with what little she has. She’s been seeing a group every now and then… maybe she could talk to them and ask to join?
“Holy shit,” her eyes widen as she recognizes the priest. Her parents never let her go back after that whole incident with Issac when she was 10. Apparently, that alone was enough for their parents to leave that church. But… beggars can’t be choosers especially since the Priest is opening up the church for everyone to go to. The priest immediately recognized her as “Jamie and Maria’s daughter.” He smiled with those beady eyes that she could hear her younger selfs thought of him being a snake.
It wasn’t so bad save for the son that kept trying to talk to her. 2 months have come and gone faster than many anticipated. The random cold days and hot days messing with peoples perception of what month but she’s betting it being near December. She had hoped that the son of the priest would’ve forgotten about her in the 2 months that she’s been here but no.
“He really, like really, likes being around you.” Angelica, a friend she’s made in the time that she’s been here. “You don’t think it’s strange?”
“I know it’s strange but s’not like I can mention it.” She sighs as she grabs her pack. “If you haven’t already noticed. His dad is becoming like the leader of this group.” An annoyance in her tone as she thinks on it. It wouldn’t be too bad if the priest wasn’t spouting his ideas to everyone. At first everyone had a voice but slowly but surely it’s like the woman are being treated less. Just a couple days ago and she was almost taken off a scavenging hunt due to her being a woman. Issac stepped in and that’s the only reason why she’s still on the team.
“Doesn’t even make sense that they wanted to take you off. You’re one of the best especially since they’ve been coming back with less and less people.” Angelica notes. It’s true though. Yesterday the Andrews brothers, Edward and Connor, died. Issac was leading that scavenging group. Eric and Alexi died four days ago also when Issac was leading them. 2 weeks prior a couple more died… Issac was also… leading at the time. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say he’s killing them.” She snorts and elbows her friend for being so bold with her words.
“Don’t say that. It’s not like those men were helping out round town anyways. Edward was a drunk and tried to drink all the alcohol that we’ve been using for wounds.” Rolling her eyes but it does seem strange that people have been dying. “Besides… it was zombies that killed them.” Patting her pants as since Issac would always come back to tell the harrowing tale of the dead outside, “that’s bound to happen at this point.”
“I’m just saying.” Angelica raises her hands. Her eyes flickering as some of the men come around. A look of disgust on Angelica’s face and she laughs. She wishes she would’ve meet her in university. “Here comes the dicks.” Her arms crossed. She knows her friend’s just upset because she’s been on ‘cleaning duty’. Some old fart told her that it’s better for a woman to be doing a ‘womans job’.
She’s just glad that— “Eve!” Speak of the devil. Issac comes running up with a wide grin. All teeth in it as he eyes her up and down making her bite back a shiver.
“That ain’t my name.” Gritting through her teeth as politely as she can. He’s been insistent on calling her that. It was cute in the beginning but now it’s just downright annoying. “What’s going on?”
“You’ll always be my Eve.” He laughs, his hands on his hips. Leaning forward, “No, no, just wanted to tell you that they’re passing out some more rations.” Her eyebrows perk up and even Angelica looks shocked. Angelica’s lips purse as she stands closer.
“Thought we were running low?” He looks at Angelica, his fingers flexing a lil as his left foot shifts a bit.
“We are but,” he pauses as he looks back from the friend to her. “We found some deer a couple weeks ago and we’ve been getting it ready to share it. Isn’t that wonderful, Eve?” He steps closer getting more in her space.
“Couple weeks ago?” Angelica muses and is shoulders tense a bit. “You mean when you came back with nothing?” Her arms crossed as she ain’t buying it. Angelicas’ never liked Issac, been more vocal about him being a creep and honestly that’s what she loves about Angelica. She’s never been afraid to speak her mind. “Came back with nothing except some men dead save for your friends. Strange ain’t it?” He turns his head towards her, his green eyes staring at her as his hands flexes again.
“We found a deer but didn’t want to say anything incase it’s infected. As for the men that died, I told you. Zombies attacked us.”
“Was that before or after you found this miraculous deer?”
Her hand touches on Angelica’s shoulder as Issac and her are having a stand off. The atmosphere shifting and she swears she could hear a pin drop. “Angelica.” She says and then looks to Issac and her, “A deer was found that’s all that matters.” Her friend scoffs and backs away. Walking away to cool off..
“You should’t be friends with her, Eve.” Watching Angelica leave before he turns and faces her fully. “My dads gonna announce some things when the food is passed out in the church. I’ll save you a seat.” He doesn’t offer, he never offers and always expects her to sit next to him.
“I appreciate that but I’m already sitting with Angelica.”
His hand reaches up and puts a hair behind her ear. It takes everything in her to not shove his hand away. “A pity. You need better friends.” A grin spreads on his face and she takes a step back.
Later that night when the food from the deer was passed the priest announced that he will be taking more of a leadership role, “Just until a vote happens.” He smiles wide and some of the men and even the woman are happy about it. Angelica had her concerns about it but nothing could be done. A couple months go by and the ones that tried to be leader would either get sick or somehow die. Of course, her friend called it suspicious.
“Georgie was the last person to try for it and he went on a scavenging group and somehow died by a zombie attack.” She says hotly, she hasn’t let it go and has spoken about it again and again. “Georgie was built like a brick house and knew his way with a knife and you’re telling me that he somehow died but not Issac or Issac’s friends?” She scoffs and scrubs the dishes.
It has been suspicious. Especially with the way things have been turning within the group. More and more women are put in ‘womanly’ roles. The men have outright refused to wash or clean things. Mandatory church meetings whenever the priest feels ‘called’ to say something too. Even she’s been takin off the scavenging groups finally. The men even tried to take her fathers rifle from her.
Doesn’t help that people have been on edge, everyone thinks the rations might be bad or spoiled since a good amount have been getting sick. “I’m not saying you’re wrong, but you need to keep it down. Ange,” her friend walks off in a huff, “Ange, come on.” Her hand reaches out and grabs hers. “I trust you. You know I do. If you say it’s weird then I believe you.” Her voice softer as she looks at her friend.
“Look I think we sho—“ the sound of a bell ringing cuts her off. “Great.” Glaring in the direction of the church. “What has he been called to speak about now.” Normally the loud noises would attract the attention of the zombies but cars and some wooden fences have been used as walls. Along with patrols, their relatively safe. “Let’s get this over with.”
The people move closer to the church, the cold making people bundle up as much as possible. Texans aren’t built for the cold. More for heat and crazy hurricanes. Everyone thinks it’s somewhere near February. Maybe early April since sometimes it can still be cold. One of the reasons why everyone’s been snappy lately. Typically, animals should be coming back since Spring is slowly creeping up. “Yeah,” she murmurs in agreement, “Let’s hear what he has to say now and move along.”
The priest smiles at everyone coming in, not like anyone has a choice. His Bible prepped as he speaks on the pulpit. He drones on and on about sin and that the sinners outside the walls are trying to lead people astray, the sinners being the zombies and anyone not in town. Something she’s found weird. He keeps speaking and she looks around bored until he says something that makes her tense. “And as for the lovely woman of our town. God has put on my heart that it is now time for us to repopulate the earth. Even some of the man has said that they’ve felt God’s call to marry some of the woman here.”
Her blood runs cold as she can feel eyes on her. Angelica moves her hand to grip hers. “I would be more than happy to marry off people in our lovely town. I think it’s time for marriage and eventually… children.” The smile he gives doesn’t feel right. She doesn’t like the way he says children. Doesn’t like how she just knows Issac is staring at her. Hair standing up on the back of her neck.
Finally, the sermon ends and she leaves quickly with Angelica in tow. “We need to leave.” Angelica pulls her aside. “I don’t like this one bit. Not shittin on any Christian here but this feels more like a man-made call than God’s call.” And she can’t help but agree. They know they can’t just outright leave. They have no preserves and no way of knowing how bad it is out there since they aren’t allowed out anymore. None of the woman are.
Tensions rising in the town as the men have made proposals but the woman that have been proposed to would say no. The priest would mention how it isn’t right to go against God’s word but he understood by saying, “The ladies are just nervous about having such fine suitors.”
Things changed in the coming months, when Spring slowly started getting warmer. Summer on the horizon. People are still dying on the scavenging groups and people aren’t getting as sick from the rations. Unmarried women are no longer allowed anywhere without a chaperon because of ‘safety’ reasons. “Ladies aren’t as strong as our fellow men. The Lord has implored that we protect the weak and feebler bodies.”
Issac has been more and more insistent with being her chaperone even with Angelica always being around. He’s been hovering more around her, and she hates it especially when he keeps getting in her bubble. Someone tugs on her hand and then pulls her into a closet. “Hey!”
“Shh!” A hand presses to her and she relaxes as she recognized that Angelica is the one that grabbed her. “They’re kicking out some of the woman that has been saying no to getting married.”
“What?”
“Lily, you remember her? Button nose Lilly,” she nods and Angelica continues, “Sam’s been trying to marry her for weeks now. I just overheard Issac saying that he and the men are going to take her stuff and kick her out.”
“You can’t be serious.”
“Dead fucking serious.” Her stare hard as she leans against the wall. “We need to leave.”
“And go where?”
“Anywhere but here. I’ve told Tommy no 10 times already. If I’m going to get kicked out then I want to do it on my own terms.” Her hand reaches out and grabs hers. “Come with me. No more Issac. No more town. Just us.” Her thumbs rub on her hand. “We can leave this all behind us. Finally visit New York like you were telling me about.”
Thinking it over as she always does, careful and cautious, as she looks at Angelica. “Ange, I…”
“Look I.. I like you,” her eyes widen but Angelica still speaks, “and I don’t want to leave if you don’t. I’ll get kicked out anyways but Issac.” Her face sours. “I know he won’t let you leave. He’s been obsessed with you. I don’t like it. I don’t like how he stares at you.”
“You like me?”
“Is that all you got out of what I said?” Angelica frowns and then slowly smiles. Pulling her closer as she smiles. “Yes, dingus. I like you. Have for a while and I—“ the sound of a bell ringing again and she growls in frustration. Stepping back but a hand grabs Angelica and pulls her close to press a chaste kiss that makes her gasp.
“I like you to.”
“You Motherfucker.” A blush spreading and she glares lightheadedly. Holding her hand as they walk out the closet to listen to what the priest has to say. The sermons have been getting more and more strict. More far-right Christian ideals. The priest stands at the front of the church welcoming everyone in like he always does. His beady eyes stare at her and as she holds Angelica’s hand.
They sit at a back pew, whispering their plan as the priest talks. The men saying their amens as the woman, at least some of them are speaking. “It is with a heavy heart that I must say that Lily White will no longer be in our town.” Some gasps in the congregation as she holds tighter to Angelica’s hand. “From now on, a woman must marry if they are for their hand in marriage. The men have all been called to marry certain woman. To deny that is to deny God. We cannot allow sin and disobedience to be in our town.” They both look at each other and as soon as the sermon ends they nearly run out.
Green eyes watching as they rush out. Not stopping until they are in their shared room. “We need to leave, Ange.” Angelica nods and immediately starts packing their things.
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