#I wasn't in the right headspace to do the ending

[athousandbyeol]

keep up the thamepo [episode 8]

this episode easily became my favourite episode after episode 1. the flavours are beautifully mixed and I love how everything ties together into a wonderful and coherent dish.

i was fearful of the possibility of them dragging the jun-thame-po drama until the end of the episode, but I'm glad they resolved it at such a right pace and gave us more time to witness another step taken by thame and po—the progress of their relationship is beautiful and captivating. it makes me giddy and happy and shy and rooting for them even more.

i don't have much to say about the past few episodes because they're quite direct and easy to digest (in my opinion). however, I'm keen on talking about jun's side of the story and the physical intimacy between thame and po (finally!)

p.s. i do apologise for not writing this weekly thamepo post for episodes 6 and 7 for reasons I've stated previously. but without further ado, let's begin!

1. jun's unrequited love — his sacrifice for the friendship that means more than the world to him

for weeks, i've been asking myself, "what's up with jun?"

his actions confused me because the series!jun was doing things that were different from novel!jun. for context, I read some spoilers a few weeks ago, and I learned that in the novel, jun likes thame. the air hockey scene was when he was *kind of* confessing his feelings for thame, but not directly and openly. i don't know how novel!jun treats novel!po, therefore I can't really make a deduction if he's also falling for po. but in terms of the series!jun, I believe he did like po.

let's be serious. he wouldn't be here if he didn't have feelings for po. i don't think anyone can convince me (at this point) that he didn't like po romantically.

he knew thame was busy dealing with khun pemika at the company (and other stuff pertaining to MARS), so he took another step to be there for po when thame couldn't—he didn't want po to feel left out or abandoned.

it's so fascinating to me that at this point, jun believed that their feelings were one-sided; he knew po liked thame, but jun didn't believe that thame would feel the same. i think this has a lot to do with the fact that thame is more of show not tell kind of person.

jun was looking at thame and po—he was observing them. he was trying to put two and two together (and hoping that the answer wouldn't be four because if it did—he would have to back off). but the answer was indeed four and jun...

i think, at the back of jun's mind, he knew what was happening between thame and po—it was so obvious that they shared something mutual. but jun was battling his own devils. along the way, as his feelings grew for po, and all those moments spent with po—perhaps jun saw that he had a chance. he only had to be in this headspace where he believed thame didn't feel the same for po. thus, why jun was running away from thame—because jun knew, if he confronted thame (or vice versa), he would discover the truth. and I guess, he wasn't ready for that rejection.

jun was really attentive, and that wasn't a surprise. he was always watching and trying to access/understand the situation. i guess, aside from pepper, jun would be the next to see the bigger picture. he would be the one to take charge if thame and pepper couldn't.

he knew po's favourite snacks. he wanted to be there with po—for po. even though he's brash and rough, this was his way of showing that he cared—he loved.

(i think i've covered more extensively jun's character in this post for better understanding of where I'm coming from hehe)

so the confrontation began and jun said everything he wanted to say to thame.

in my opinion, jun believed that whatever thame were doing for po wasn't enough. i guess, jun put himself in po's shoes for a while here—it reminded him of how thame selflessly took all the burden of MARS and carried them on his shoulders alone. thame did those things for the sake of the group, and jun found that unbelievably selfish because they're in a group—he's supposed to be thame's best friend, someone he could trust and talk to—they should be in this together. but it was second nature for thame to take everything and leave nothing on the plate, probably because of his role as a leader.

i think jun was hoping that thame wouldn't do that alone. he didn't want thame to blame himself for everything that happened to MARS before they reunited. jun didn't like many decisions thame made, so this was why he decided to distance himself from MARS and led the other members astray from thame. it was his way of coping with problems and betrayal and disappointment: he would run because he wanted to avoid conflict—he didn't want to paint anyone as the bad guy.

so this was what he did: he avoided thame so that he didn't have to confess his own feelings for po, while he vaguely knew that po might not feel the same.

even though i know many of us (me included) were confused about jun and the reason behind his doings, this episode really cleared the air for me. he loved his friendship with thame more than anything—he loved thame a lot to put a stop to their years of friendship. people could say anything about him, but at the end of the day, jun genuinely cared about thame and po. and he chose them over his own feelings.

(i also love the back-and-forth tension between jun and thame as they confessed the things they'd been dying to say to each other. and each time they were right, the puck entered the goal. that was so effective to prove the intensity of their emotions from a literary standpoint I was actually vibrating in awe because they DID THAT so well ugh it was so delicious!!!)

but the thing that made me scream and lose my breath was thame asked jun "you like him, don't you?" and the puck entered jun's goal OH MY GOD THAT WAS PEAK CINEMA in my opinion!!!

and jun was transported back to those moments shared with po, that little time he spent with po—these feelings that were growing fonder by the second. they were fleeting, but still so beautiful. (if this isn't love then I guess... I'm blindsided by love. i don't know what love is anymore t_t)

and it broke me when jun answered, "it doesn't matter how I feel," because JUN, LOVE, YOUR FEELINGS MATTERED GOODNESS :'(

and when jun said to thame, "you don't even have feelings for him," THAME STOPPED THE PUCK FROM ENTERING HIS GOAL GOODNESS THAT WAS ANOTHER PEAK CINEMA MOMENT BECAUSE!!!!!!!

it wasn't true. he had feelings for po. he loved po. thame loved po so much.

i think, due to his inexperience, thame didn't know much about navigating his feelings for po. he didn't know what was enough and what was overdoing things. thame was always standing on this thin line between sanity and madness—he didn't know how to find the perfect balance. there was no doubt that thame liked po more intensely, but in jun's eyes (and I believe pepper too), thame wasn't doing enough. and po could be oblivious sometimes, so that was why jun saw this as a chance for him to make a move—to revolve with po. because love wasn't only about late-night texts and failed movie dates and long walks and heart-to-heart talks. love should be thame moving forward with po and not for po—love should be thame holding po's hand and facing the upcoming obstacle together—not just handling it alone.

jun just didn't want thame to repeat the same mistake he did with MARS. after he knew everything from po about thame's sacrifices (in episode 3), he was gutted that thame kept so much guilt and anger alone. he just wanted thame to prove (more to himself than anyone) that he was a man of his word—he would be there for MARS and po. he would love and protect them as promised.

jun and thame's friendship runs deeper than the sea and we can't pretend that we can't see the depth of their understanding and reliance on each other. these two individuals have so much love to give and receive, but the winner takes all—and in this game, thame won.

thame said that even though they'd been friends for a long time, neither of them had to back down if they really liked po. this also proved thame's selflessness and also his openness to accepting the what-ifs of po not picking him.

however, i believe, jun loves thame and this friendship more than his blossoming feelings for po—jun backed down for the sake of this friendship—for his love and respect for thame. //jun... I've wronged you in so many ways. I'm sorry that I doubted you. love, you deserve more than the entire world :'(//

jun said he didn't have feelings for po: this was his way of waving the white flag. i think jun believed it wasn't worth giving up years of friendship and watching it going down the drain just for a person—even though jun hoped it could transpire into something more meaningful if he never discovered about thame's truest feelings for po. but like I said, it was clear from the start that thame and po liked each other, and all jun wanted (and tried to avoid) was to believe he could be in thame's shoes if thame stayed in his spot—if he didn't get the clarification from thame about his feelings for po.

jun was obviously dejected and disheartened, but he masked it so well with that usual smugness. but at least, in my eyes, I knew jun genuinely liked po, and he cared about him in ways that thame was lacking before. but he believed po was better off with thame instead of him since their feelings were already equal.

and i have an inkling that thame—to an extent—knew that jun was lying. i think thame knew jun liked po too... and this was why episode 3!jun and episode 3!thame were so important to be understood because their friendship is so genuine and strong and nothing could ever break this bond except the both of them. thame was aware of the sacrifices jun did and vice versa. this wouldn't affect their friendship—this wouldn't make them crumble. they loved each other too much to let it happen (although they'll never say this aloud).

jun turned from a thame's potential competitor to thamepo's unofficial cupid. no one's doing it like jun. he's the OG definition of 'best friend' in my opinion: a pain in the ass, but would stand up for others no matter what.

and the way he was looking at po here... it felt like a goodbye to his feelings for po :( but I hope they'll continue being this bickering duo and frenemies because jun really helped po see his potential and po gave jun warmth and comfort like never before :(

also, shoutout to nut for being the perfect jun! you're an amazing actor! the emotional rollercoaster you strapped me into while watching your shenanigans and heart eyes for po gave me chest pains (tbvh). but friend, I love you. i hope you'll find happiness *coughs* dylan *coughs* ;)

it drives me insane that jun and po were finally meeting somewhere with a brighter setting and lighting—probably hinting that both of their feelings are no longer in the dark. no one was hiding from the truth anymore.

this was when jun got the last confirmation that po liked thame—and this was where po knew that thame liked him too. this ended on a bittersweet note for jun, but an epiphany for po. //my heart hurts for unknown reasons...//

2. physical intimacy — another step forward, a moment of clarity

sometimes, i think, thamepo took the slow burn too seriously because what do you mean in episode 8 we finally got them properly holding hands??? (but i love it so much T_T)

but the whole sequence of thame and po talking, trying to squeeze out the 'i like you' from each other but didn't get to because that felt too heavy on their shoulders for now. so they settled with conversations filled with metaphors and symbols and I'm always down for that ;)

i think this was the first time that they were this physically close. my heart was in my throat for the remaining 13 minutes because they were so shy and this moment felt so intimate and sensual and I shouldn't be prodding but I couldn't stop gawking at them finally being this close and all over each other (metaphorically) and I didn't know where they were heading—

and thame decided to watch the movie in po's room because, like jun said—

"why you should be there in a rush? seeing him today, I guess, at most, you'll just end up staring at each other. I'm telling you, during the first six months of dating him, even holding hands is an achievement. and it will take two whole years before you two get to kiss. as for going to his room, i'd say it'll definitely take up to five years."

the way i CACKLED because jun, friend, sorry to burst your bubble, but these knuckleheads FINALLY HELD HANDS!!!!!!!!!

i wondered if i was a victorian man seeing a woman's ankle for the first time because this scene got me squeaking and screeching and hollering and screaming and giggling and blushing and losing my marbles because yes!!! finally! they were one step closer (literally and physically)! thame was really proving jun wrong because this guy was done being vanilla xD

there's really this different charge in the air after thame and po reached a moment of clarity through jun. thame was visibly more confident, and po was more open to accepting thame's advances (even though he was still nervous. i think this still has a lot to do with the emotional trauma that po has after his break-up with earn).

thame did the korean male lead move here and expect me not to scream??? the audacity.

and when thame said he wanted to do so many things (to po and with po), but watching a movie in po's room would be enough for this new beginning—THAME YOU'RE INSANE!!!

and yes, thame was buying a bottle of water and lozenges for his throat to spend the night with po (and not what we had in mind... 👀)

we know what's coming next week. and that particular scene (the second picture)... if you know, you know... //readying myself to jump off the nearest rooftop//

are we even ready for thamepo dating era? //i'm not...//

[brightestorangedawn]

First Time/Last Time (read on ao3)

Summary: The first time Anakin and Padmé sleep together, then the last time.

Pairing: Anakin/Padmé

Rating: E

Tags: possessive Anakin Skywalker, first time, character study, angst, sexual content

Status: Complete!

Cool evening mist on the lake outside, fireplace warmth turning the sitting room golden.

Her veil on the floor, her dress on top of it. 

'Do you trust me?' he asked.

'Of course.'

'Do you love me?' he asked.

'Even more so.'

He was on top of her, resting on his knees and elbows. She was beneath him, her skin pinkish, maybe from the fire, maybe from something else. Her lips were full, ripe. Parting just a little. Her tongue wet her bottom lip then her teeth nipped it. He wanted to do the same. His mouth descended onto hers. 

The nervous energy flowed out from their limbs and crackled on their fingertips. 

‘This is my first time.’ He admitted what she must already know.

‘Mine too,’ she whispered. 

He was privately glad. Nobody else had been where he had been. Nobody else had been allowed to know her the way he was going to. And nobody else ever would (he would make sure of it–the thought came darkly to his mind and was dismissed). She was his wife, the secret name of Skywalker given to her in front of a brilliant sunset. 

What was it his mother had said about the sun? 

‘You can’t stop the change any more than you can stop the suns from setting.’

When he was a boy he had become a Jedi in the last rays of the sun. When he was a man he had become a husband in that same light.

What would this change do to his life? (Read more here)

[chappellrroan]

and why?

reblog after voting!!

[gingerbreadmonsters]

skimming through all of the dead text at the end of an old fic is so strange but weirdly satisfying and i could not even begin to explain why

[the-hanged-mans-ghost]

vent-ish rambling in the notes ig bc I can't think and my brain is fuzzy but I have Thoughts

[paging-possum]

looking at my old big isometric perspective drawing next to the one I just finished is SO CRAZY because like!! holy shit!!! I got so much better in the span of a year! I remember making that drawing thinking it was the best thing I'd ever made and now I'm looking at the one I just made and feeling a little bit the same while also knowing that I grew SO MUCH in just a year and who knows where I'll be in another year! wow!!!!

[yamujiburo]

Here's an arc I thought about doing but won't do because, it'd be a bit too sad and also it's too similar to the Turing Point Arc I already did and also it would be long. But I'll write it here for you angst enjoyers. This ended up being longer than I thought.

Despite getting the "okay" from Ash to date Jessie, Delia still worries that she's not doing the right thing or being a bad mom. Up until now she'd convinced herself that she had the right to be selfish for once after knowing only sacrifice and putting herself last.

Jessie and Ash, while not as antagonistic towards each other, still go at it. A Pikachu zap here, an angry "twerp" being uttered there. The guilt settles in for Delia and figures that it's best to just cut things off before things potentially get worse or before she gets too attached to Jessie. Her son comes first after all. That's what she signed up for when becoming a parent.

She sits Jessie down, eyes watery (it's the first time Jessie's ever seen Delia come close to crying). Delia says she thinks they should end things. Jessie is stunned but accepts it quickly. She sucks it up in the moment, puts a resigned smile on her face and tells Delia she'll leave immediately and not to worry about her. Delia's also broken up about it but promised herself she'd never cry over a goodbye and she wasn't gonna start now.

Jessie goes to James and Meowth's place greeted similarly to this, lightly teasing her about blowing it with Delia, and she breaks down sobbing. Oops it's real this time. James and Meowth do everything in their power to make her feel better. They let her know that things like this happen and they're ready to go wherever she wants to go (knowing that it'd likely be to painful for her to stay in Pallet). As much as she wants to leave, she doesn't want James and Meowth to lose the good thing they have going. She's not in the right headspace to make any decisions so she'll get to it later.

Ash returns home after doing a little training at Oak's lab. He notices Jessie's not around and asks his mom where she is. Delia is about to tell him but can't quite bring herself to say the truth out loud yet. She simply says "I don't know". Ash looks disappointed. "Aw man, I wanted to see if she wanted to battle. She makes a good battle buddy for all of my newer, baby Pokémon." Delia perks up that this. As quickly as he came, he leaves again to go train his Pokémon.

Later, Delia approaches Ash, asking him if he really meant that what he said about Jessie being a good battle partner. He gives her an enthusiastic "yeah!" and tells her that it's been nice having another battle ready trainer around since there's not many in Pallet. Delia starts to pry a little more. "I thought you and Jessie didn't get along?" Ash is confused, and tells Delia they get along great! "Jessie doesn't steal anymore! And she's getting better at battling which is cool." Delia brings up that she's head them argue before. "Oh... well I guess that's just how we are. I'd be weirded out if she was suddenly too nice to me all the time. Jessie's actually a lot like Misty. But taller!" This gives Delia a lot to think about but what's done is done and it's no use pressing on. It's easier this way.

The next morning Delia's getting ready for work. She must not have noticed that she was acting weird but Ash picks up on it. "What's wrong mom?" Delia's shocked he noticed (he's not usually this perceptive). She tells him it's nothing and that she just slept bad. "Hm. But Jessie says that when you're upset you get really quiet and intense." Delia notices that she was pretty intensely mixing the pancake batter. "Jessie told you that?" Ash nods. "Hey speaking of, where is Jessie? Haven't seen her since yesterday." Delia stops mixing and tells Ash that she and Jessie aren't together anymore. Ash is confused and upset at the idea of Jessie doing something that would hurt his mom enough for them to break up. Delia lets him know that Jessie didn't do anything like that and that them breaking up was just for the best. But Ash questions this, pointing out that he's never seen Delia as happy as she was when Jessie was there and also how Delia looks really sad now. Delia can't argue with that but then tells him that it's complicated. Ash, to Delia's surprise, looks a bit disappointed. He's bummed he wasn't able to say goodbye first and asks if she thinks Jessie would still be willing to come by and train with him sometimes. Delia asks him once more if he was really okay with her and Jessie dating. "Yeah I thought I said that already? Jessie's pretty cool when she's not being evil. And she really likes Pokémon which is a plus!" Such simple criteria. Delia's now worried that she might've made a mistake. She finishes making breakfast and heads to work.

At the restaurant she's met by James. She can feel an awkwardness hanging in the air. She knows that James knows. Before she can say anything James tells Delia thank you for employing him and helping him, Meowth and Jessie get back on their feet but that he's going to quit working at the restaurant and that they'll likely be leaving Pallet soon. Delia's heart sinks. There's now a ticking clock and she has to decide what she wants to do SOON. She asks James where Jessie is. James hesitantly tells her that she's at his and Meowth's place. Delia pleads with James to work the restaurant for one more day at least and to cover this shift. She has to go talk to Jessie. He agrees, hoping that this is a good thing.

Delia runs to James and Meowth's place. She knocks on the door upon arrival and waits. It takes a moment but she hears the door unlock. Jessie opens the door, disheveled, tears and snot all over her face, draped in a blanket. Jessie notices it's Delia and, frightened, slams the door. Delia's stunned for a moment and goes to knock on the door again but before she can the door opens. This time Jessie's tears are gone, her hair's fixed and she ditched the blanket. "Oh hey, Delia! What brings you here?" Delia can't help but be charmed. But this is serious. She shakes it off and asks if they could talk. Jessie invites her in. They get to the couch and Jessie starts frantically cleaning up all the crumpled tissues and dirty dishes off the ground. "Heh I caught a cold yesterday. A one day cold. I'm fine now." Delia doesn't call out the obvious lie and gets straight to the point.

She tells Jessie that she's worried she made a mistake. She made a panicked decision that she was hoping would protect Ash and her future self. But now realizes that she was afraid of the idea that she'd made a selfish decision by dating her. It was a selfish decision but that didn't mean it was a bad one. She was the happiest she'd been, Jessie and Ash were learning to get along and were getting along much better than she'd though. She acknowledges that Jessie has been there for Ash in a way that she can't quite be and is also grateful to her for managing to keep Ash home a little longer. She asks if Jessie would be willing to take her back (despite the distress she caused). Jessie starts sobbing with happy tears. She tearfully says she'll try even harder to get along with Ash and be a better person. Delia reassures her that she's doing just fine.

They kiss passionately but then realize it's weird that they're making out in James in Meowth's place and say they'll continue later. Delia tells Jessie to head back home and that Ash is looking forward to battling with her (and she also needs to let James and Meowth not to quit their jobs).

The end~

[yaniluvs]

lingering touches and stolen kisses 日 ── ot8 [hyung line] skz ; how is pda with your boyfriend?

click to be directed to the maknae-line version !!

𓍯 hyung-line idol!skz ʚଓ fem!reader ：（ 𝒾 ）0.7k ── ༯ HEADCANONS, tooth rotting fluff, kisses, hugs, established relationship, req. by anon . ⸝⸝𓂃 LiBRARY. /ᐠ.ꞈ.ᐟ\ྀི���ི

yani's note ˖˙ ᰋ and she makes a comeback !! i'm sorry for the sudden infamous inactive era AGAIN, the past two weeks were well.. very busy and i wasn't in the right headspace at all, but i'm better now! i was also binge reading the powerless trilogy so.. maybe expect some fics about it too? thank y'all for 430 followers <3 and thanks to anon for the request, hope you like it! comments, requests, asks, likes and reblogs are always appreciated ! comment/ask if you want to be added to my mastertag ! happy reading <3

chris ୨୧ he is definitely the type who does not give two shits. he will kiss you whenever he wishes to; at the recording studio, when 3racha and maybe even rest of his members are recording for the coming album; in breaks; during practice when you come visit him, or when you’re at his shared dorm with jeongin. this man will not hesitate once to pull you onto his lap, and pressing light, feather kisses to your lips, cheeks, nose, forehead, with soft pats on your head or middle. however it’s hard to miss how adorable he looks when crimson rises up his cheeks, ears and neck, grin widening as deep chuckles leave his mouth- followed by a glare, because seungmin probably calls you two grandparents or just him, an old man. he will get shy and flustered when his members tease him — but that won’t stop him from fulfilling his wishes, after some giggling !! he needs to have his arm around you, or fingers lacing yours or his on your thigh, at all times. a simple act that helps him ground, knowing you’re there with him. and of course, he will keep a limit to the pda, not wanting to cringe out or distract his members — or get himself carried away with you.

minho ୨୧ this man is definitely a ruthless tease. you're around him and the members, he's leaning in close, your noses touching. the next thing you know, he flicks your nose with that stupid grin on his face, sprinting away to continue practicing or whatever it was that he was doing. but the teasing ends soon, as he just can't help but be beside you all the time. have his hand on your lower back, hips (living up to the butthunter title), or even holding your hands if you're lucky. he will fold but pretend to act nonchalant when you give him a peck on the cheek- or lips.

changbin ୨୧ okay hmo. he loves loves LOVES back hugs. it doesn’t matter if he’s on the giving or receiving end. he just loves them. also forehead kisses and cuddling even if it’s brief !!!!!!!!!!!!!! he is down bad for physical affection, definitely. having you on his lap, or his arms around your waist, and caressing your skin. pecks on the lips for sure. he won’t mind the others but he will get shy but a little when the members tease him or hyunjin feigns hurt of his wife leaving him; only for you to fluster your boyfriend more after another kiss. a big baby, always wanting to be close to you. (dying rn)

hyunjin ୨୧ he is such a romantic guy. when it comes to pda, i think he's definitely very touchy. in a good way; he might be back-hugging you, resting his chin on your head or shoulder, or leaving a ghost of a kiss at the back of your neck, under your hairline. probably also likes if your fingers are intertwined too, with him kissing your knuckles. he will not leave your side, at all !!!!!!!!! you're like his personal lucky charm. maybe during a break from practice, he'll be showing you the new choreo and maybe even teaching it to you so you to try it.. but i bet the two of you will get carried away, and will either be making out very intimately or start ballroom-dancing while giggling like elementary kids. he really loves you and will show it every minute !!

hyunjin ୨୧ he is such a romantic guy. when it comes to pda, i think he's definitely very touchy. in a good way; he might be back-hugging you, resting his chin on your head or shoulder, or leaving a ghost of a kiss at the back of your neck, under your hairline. probably also likes if your fingers are intertwined too, with him kissing your knuckles. he will not leave your side, at all !!!!!!!!! you're like his personal lucky charm. maybe during a break from practice, he'll be showing you the new choreo and maybe even teaching it to you so you to try it.. but i bet the two of you will get carried away, and will either be making out very intimately or start ballroom-dancing while giggling like elementary kids. he really loves you and will show it every minute !!

mastertag ୨୧ @cosmicalily

[dollfacefantasy]

make up sex w/ billy butcher ♡

billy butcher x fem!reader cw: nsfw (18+), smut, p in v, daddy kink a/n: eeeee i'm so excited for the last episode

Weeks of torture lead to this. Almost a month of clipped tones and cold stares, fake smiles and pushing the line between love and hate. It all leads to nights like tonight. They were why you put up with all of it.

You and Butcher had a fight a couple weeks ago. It wasn't relationship ending, but it was more tense than most. Strained the two of you enough that the rest of the team could tell something was up.

But right now, you couldn't even remember what the disagreement had been about. Something with some recon assignment - he should've done this, or you should've been somewhere. It was currently lost in your mind because it was hard to care about anything else when the swollen tip of his cock was nudging against all the right spots inside you.

He had you on your back in his bed, his arms hooked behind your knees to keep you in place. You had your arms around his neck the best you could. You wanted him as close as possible. As much as he'd pissed you off, you really did miss him.

You missed the soft, syrupy headspace he could coax you into. The one that made you look at him like he hung the moon and stars and sculpted all the earth's mountains. The one you were in at this moment.

"Daddyyyyy," you whine for him, your arms closing tighter over his shoulders.

A breathy groan rumbles against your neck. It made him feel so fucking pathetic, but every time you said that it was like a spool of ribbon unraveled in his belly. The words that follow don't even feel like his own. It's like they've been carved into his consciousness by some divine being that ensures your pussy never strays too far from him.

"Daddy's here, baby. Daddy's right here. He's taking care of you."

Those mumbled reassurances have your walls constricting around him, trying to lure him further in and then lock him down there forever. He feels your thighs trembling so hard against his sides that they're practically vibrating. You needed this.

"Fuck, you're gonna push me out. Too fucking tight," he grunts.

"Nuh uh, daddy's too fucking big," you laugh and nudge the side of his head with your nose.

He glances over at you, chuckling at your dopey smile. His mouth lands on yours for a sloppy kiss. Your lips slide against one another with the momentum of his thrusts.

"Yeah? Or is flattery how you apologize, love?" he teases.

That gets a laugh out of you. "It's not flattery if it's true."

Your giggles are cut short by more of your own moaning, the sweet bursts of joy morphing into whiny cries. You try to roll your hips up to meet his pelvis, to get him even deeper, to get more friction on your throbbing clit.

If you were more lucid, you'd feel how smug he was oozing off of him. He took great pride in the fact that he could get you like this. That he could take you, totally capable and independent, and fuck you till you were whimpering daddy and rutting against him like it was all you were good for.

"You want it bad, don't you? I could probably sit still and let you just fuck yourself on my cock and get the same feeling," he murmurs.

That earns him a wild head shake from you. "Noooo," you plead, "Not the same as when daddy does it."

"Oh, not the same, hm?" he mocks, "Guess I have to keep going then. Can't leave you unsatisfied."

Your head bobs up and down as you nod. You were getting so close. It'd be plain cruel to tease you like that now. He was getting close too. The pulsating warmth of your hole was too much for him to resist much longer.

"Where do you want it, baby?" he asks mid-pump.

"Inside, daddy. Pretty pretty please. Need it inside," you beg automatically.

He'd have to be evil not to give you a creampie right now. Not after the weeks you spent abstaining from his cock. No, tonight you needed his load shot deep in your cunt.

"My girl," he coos and pecks your temple, "You need the reminder of who you belong to."

You nod eagerly. You needed the physical manifestation of the end of this fight. The ropes of his cum fired inside you would seal the deal.

So that's what he does. You squeal, and your entire body contracts as the bubble of euphoria inside you pops. Your hands scramble to grab at him.

"Daddy, daddy, daddy. Fuck, fuck, fuck," pours from your lips.

He strengthens his hold on you, presses you down so hard into the mattress that it's shocking the wood doesn't snap. He chokes out a loud groan and unloads himself inside you. His hips fuck against you in sharp bursts. His breaths come out in rough pants. As much as he loved what he did to you, what you did to him was a sight to behold as well.

When you've both come down, he rolls off of you. You both get the chance to breathe and cool down, before he tugs you close again and nuzzles the top of your head.

"You feel better now, darling?" he smirks against your hair.

"Mhm," you answer with a dreamy sigh, "Never gonna fight again."

[natailiatulls07]

your charles x sister! reader fics are so cute! i love them so so so so so so much!! i was wondering if you could write one where charles and his teen! sister get in an argument (mostly his fault) and she’s ignoring him and he has to leave for a race before he can apologise and she still supports him but won’t talk to him and him making it up to her eventually pretty please! i love your work so much !!!

Charles Leclerc x Sister!reader

Summary - The request above :3

Warnings - Arguing and swearing

A/n - Thank you lovie! I feel like I haven't done Leclerc Sister fic in a long while so it's great to be back <3

Masterlist

-

Usually the week before a triple header, Charles likes to spend his free time around family. He feels like it gives him that chance to relax and get back into the right mindset. During this time the family would play board games, catch up on favourite tv shows and catch up on life. 

Charles loves this time. With his formula one schedule and Arthur's schedule, it’s not often that the two brothers can hang out with their older brother and younger sister. They all come together to spend this time as they did before he and Arthur started karting.

However this week something was off. Everyone in the family could see how indifferent Charles was acting. It wasn’t like no one knew why, it was pretty clear why he was acting like this. 

From the start of the season, Ferrari wasn’t having a good time. At least once every race, something went wrong. And Charles was getting the shorter end of the stick, he felt like he was getting totally screwed off in every possible way.

He really tried to not let it affect him but this was his career, without this he’d be nothing. So naturally this was going to crush his self-esteem, his confidence and his calmed headspace.

-

'Charles?' Y/n’s voice broke through the quietness of his stream, everyone watching could see how tense Charles was. The chat, which was going unnoticed by the pair, was speeding down the screen with fans welcoming the younger one of the two. 

username my fav leclerc!! username Y/n I love you username hi Y/nnn username the best leclerc is here yayyy

He stayed silent, barely acknowledging Y/n. 'Charles? Maman made dinner, she told me to come get you' Everyone could see how Charles just rolled his eyes and how he grumbled when she wouldn’t leave. 

There was a beat of silence, the only noise filling the room was the occasional sound coming from his game. 'Charles?' Y/n asked again, confused as to why he wasn't replying.

And then, finally he spoke up. 'God Y/n, can you not see?! I’m busy, fuck off!' It wasn’t often that Y/n saw Charles in this light; heck this was the first time his fans were seeing him in this light. It was as if he had forgotten about all of them having front row seats to his interaction with Y/n.

They could all see the annoyance on Y/n’s face, she wasn’t going to back down just because of one fuck off thrown her way. 'What’s up with you?' She snapped back, her mother raised her not to take shit from anyone - Espercially not her brothers. 'Whatever it is, don’t take it out on me cause I did fuck all to piss you off'

Even after her argument, Charles still couldn’t back down. Funnily enough they have the same mother, so this meant they were taught the same exact thing. He wasn’t going to take shit from her either. 'Do you ever consider that maybe, just maybe, that you are the problem? I come home in the middle of an exhausting season, only for you to come and annoy me just like a fucking child.' He pauses the game and turns in his seat, completely forgetting again that he’s on stream. 'Grow the fuck up.'

The chat is practically flying by now, all the comments shouting at Charles for being so rude.

username what the fuck Charles! username better than any reality tv omfg username don't be rude to my fav leclerc like thattt username this isn't Charles, what is going on???

Y/n bursts into a sarcastic laughter, only infuriating her older brother more. 'Haha you’re so fucking funny! Even you, after being the one who helped me come out of your shadow, can make me feel so shit..'

The way she spat out her words scared Charles, he knew he fucked up. Everyone watching the stream could see how his face paled and how, with a deep frown and tears clouding her eyes, Y/n walked out of the room angerily before vigorously slamming the door.

Chat could see a grimace on his face as Charles' face fell in his hands. A deep sigh could be heard through the mic and then the stream turned black. It ended - Understandable.

-

The days following was icy cold in the Leclerc family, everyone but Y/n had been walking on eggshells. Charles felt like shit, he knew about the shadow behind himself and how it really effected the people around him (Espercially his siblings).

He knew he had to leave for the triple header soon but the thing is he has never left on a bad foot with any of his family and espercially for a long time. His anxiety was riding high.

The evening before his flight to spain, he was sat on the sofa at his childhood home with his mother and Alexandra. 'Fuck..I messed up' Infront of him, Leo was rolling around on the carpet.

Pascale just sighed, she was silently agreeing with her son because she had seen first hand the effects of fame had on Lorenzo, Arthur and Y/n. However on the other hand, she knew that it was harder for him - She just wished he handled the argument better.

'Where is she now?' Alexandras soft voice spoke up, her hand relaxing on top of her partners.

Looking over to the clock, the older women answered. 'Her friends place, I think her friendship group are having a little party you know..' That'd explain the almost eerie silence through the house. 'She'll come around, this won't last long.' A chuckle left the older womens lips. 'Never does..'

If only she knew, Pascale would be eating her words.

-

The next couple of weeks were long and hard for Charles. It seemed like everything had been going incredibly wrong for the guy. Almost every race he was finishing outside of points, the days were long and every time he'd message his little sister, he wouldn't get a reply.

You see Y/n was active on social media and Charles could see this, he could see how she was continuing to attend to her usual activities. Going to her University lectures, doing her little side influencer job and hanging out with friends.

He had heard from both his older brother and his mother how they could tell how the argument effected the youngest Leclerc. Much like Charles, this space between them was hard. Yet, she'd watch the races for him and support him. That being some sort of reassurance for Charles.

Luckily for him, he had some time between the end of the triple header at Silverstone and the next race in Hungary so the evening after the race he was on a flight back to Nice.

It didn't take long for Charles and Alexandra to arrive back to Monaco, popping to his childhood home once again. Walking in they could tell that immediately that Pascale wasn't home but then again someone was home, which only meant one person was here.

Placing her bag down on the kitchen counter, Alexandra made her way over to the stairs. 'Y/n are you home?' There was several patters of footsteps above the couple as she made her way to the living room where Charles was sat anxiously waiting. His knee was continuously bouncing up and down before Alexandra's soft hand came rest just over his kneecap. 'You'll be fine..' She whispered gently.

It didn't take long for his baby sister to reveal herself, dressed in her work out gear. Y/n tried her best to hide her anxiety and hesitation, much like her brother she hated the past weeks. 'Salut..' (Hi) She breathed out.

Charles' eye lit up when he saw her, a small smile on his face. 'Hé, où est maman?' (Hey, where's mum?) It was safe to say that small talk wasn't going to be the best thing right now but they both knew it'd help.

He watched her as she moved to sit on the opposite sofa in her usual seat. 'Elle déjeune avec une amie…Marie' (She is having lunch with a friend…Marie) Both the Ferrari driver and his girlfirnd nodded slowly and understandingly.

There was a few seconds of a surprisingly comfortable silence, no one knowing what to say until Charles felt Alexandra sharply nudge him. Looking at her in shock, she quietly urged him to apologize. 'Look I'm sorry princesse..'

Almost giving herself whip lash, Y/n looked up from she was nervously checking her nails. And then there was a moment of quiet again, she didn't know what to say. Part of wanted to be cheeky and the other wanted to be sentimental. Suddenly her lips screwed into a small smirk, and Charles would be lying if it didn't scare him.

'You know it was pretty shitty what you did.' She let out a laugh and the pair followed in suit, Charles nodding knowingly. 'But you're my big brother, you're pretty shitty in general..' He was glad she was joking about, and he allowed her joke about him.

A smile had taken its shape on his face. 'Yeah I know, forgive me?' He asked, needing to satify that last bit of anxiety in him. To which he got a quick nod in return and immediately he was up, pulling her in a long over due hug.

At first it was sweet but immediately ruined when Charles heard Y/n mumble. 'Make me a dedicated instagram post and then I'll forgive you properly..' He just sighed knowingly as a laugh escaped Alexandras lips. Of course he was being blackmailed.

'Fine.' A grumble left his lips. 'You're lucky..'

-

1.6k

[bananayuyu]

all tied up {part 1}

Pairing: Yunho x f reader

Genre: angst, eventual smut

Word count: 10.5k

Summary: You never thought you'd have such an awful rivalry with a coworker. How is he so mean, so petty, so under your skin...?

Warnings: smut, MDNI, mentions of reader wanting to die and past traumas, dub con/non con, reader is physically bound against her will, mean yunho, nipple play, fingering, unprotected penetration, after care of sorts (all the smut happens in part 2)

A/n: Well I had the goal of making this maybe 2k words initially, and now it's 22.4k so I decided to split it into two parts (please read the warnings and don't read this if you aren't in the right headspace <3)

Read part 2 here

Read it on ao3

"Morning."

Your coworker's tone is cold as ice, as if he swallowed the winter air on his way to the building and was now spitting it at you. 

"Hi," you grunt, not bothering to look up from your desk. 

It was a biting, harsh morning, and the headache you were nursing wasn't doing any favors to your mood. Only minutes into your work day you already felt bleary, your legs still shivering from the short walk between the subway station and the twenty-story building your office rested in. In the mornings you woke it from its slumber; the lights in the lobby blinking on, even the heater rumbling awake as you walked through the door, as if it took a break from its job all night, too. It certainly felt that frosty in here, especially at 7am sharp, when you stumbled in before everyone else. You preferred this early shift and were thankful to be walking out the door so early each day, early enough that even in the dead of winter the sun hadn't yet set. The early mornings never bothered you; the solitude was tender and warm with you, even if the air was cruel on these freezing winter mornings. 

The intrusion of your steely coworker was unwelcome, to say the least.

"Why are you here so early?" you ask, a sharp edge to your tone. You're bitter that you won't have your usual hour to yourself, especially given the meeting you are set to have with your boss in just a few hours. You'd needed this time to mentally prepare, and here he was ruining your plans, yet again.

"I figured I'd come in early to get work done before our little meeting with the boss," he replies, a slow sigh leaving his lips and betraying just how tense he is. Well, at least it wasn't just you. You had been dreading this morning since last Friday, when the two of you had your worst argument yet, prompting your boss to demand a meeting with you both. You had no idea what would happen; you'd never had your boss demand a scheduled meeting with you in the six years you'd worked here. Things were different now, now that you worked as a grant writer and not at the front desk, but still it was concerning. He always just met with people spontaneously, and the scheduled bi-weekly meetings for the entire administrative staff were the time where conflicts and confusion were dealt with. He'd never called just two people into his office like this; then again, no one at your company had ever butted heads like you two, so badly that it left the whole office simmering with frustration, everyone dreading the sour expression that permanently settled on your features by the end of each day. You were so different now, so changed from the calm and happy woman they all knew.

You stood to make your way to the kitchen, passing by his desk as you went to turn on the kettle, boiling water for your first tea of the day. This morning called for multiple cups, your throat scratchy and dry from nerves, your body depleted from your lack of sleep. You'd stayed up far too late with your best friend last night, rambling about the meeting, begging her to help you come up with an excuse to stay home. She'd laughed with you, throwing out a few random ideas, but she knew as well as you did that you'd be here today. As much as you dreaded it, you would only miss this meeting if you were on your literal death bed, your job meaning too much to you to lose it.

From this angle he had a perfect view of you, your face scrunched up in concentration as you set the kettle to temperature, placing other employee's dirty dishes from the sink into the dishwasher. You were too obsessed with organization, in a way that made him irrationally angry, but he couldn't stop watching you every day, watching the way you adhered so severely to your little routines, watching the way his interruptions cast your face in worry and made you snap at him. Today, like every Monday, you wore your favorite shoes, the black platform Mary Janes. Up your legs stretched your thigh-high wool socks, also black, held up by a ruffled stretch of gray lace at the top. Over your hips lay a gray tartan skirt, reaching almost down to your socks, leaving an inch of bare thigh exposed in a way he thought wasn't really work appropriate. And then there was your black turtleneck, tight and accentuating your obviously braless chest, the curves and shapes of your body not hidden in the slightest. He was watching you intently, waiting for you to finally notice, and boy was he not disappointed when you finally did.

"You've hid my mug, haven't you," you spit, slamming the dishwasher harder than you needed to. You hadn't seen it in the cabinet, so you'd gingerly searched through the dishwasher too, desperately hoping someone else hadn't used it the previous week and neglected to wash it. Not finding it in there was a relief in some ways, but immediately you knew who was at fault for its disappearance, and his dark chuckle in response to you confirmed your suspicions ten fold. "You're such a dick," you grumble under your breath, reaching for any other random mug in the cabinet, needing something to house the tea you desperately need.

"What was that?" he asks, his tone mocking you, knowing exactly the sentiment of what you'd said even if he hadn't heard you clearly. You sigh and roll your eyes, ripping open your tea bag and plopping it in the mug, gently pouring the steaming liquid over it. "You just love to blame me for everything, don't you, even if you have no proof." His voice is low, dark, and it makes a shiver run through you even as the steam of the water warms your face. "You're cruel y/n, so cruel." His tone of voice makes you feel trapped, even all these feet away, and you just freeze for a bit, your tea steeping a bit longer than it should have. A creak of the building snaps you out of it, and you fling the tea bag into the trash, gently blowing over the mug and taking a tiny sip, testing the temperature.

Finally you turn, catching a glimpse of him. Jeong Yunho, the newest addition to your little office, hired about six months ago now, you realized. The date hit you in the gut this morning; the year had flown by, especially the last half, and in days it would no longer be this year anymore, no longer be the ending of an adventure but rather the start, when you'd have to plan again, think again. His suit today is stone gray, the color only barely darker than his wool overcoat, his tie a dark navy that really just looked black. His shoes were dark navy too; which you only knew because of the difference in the toe box from his other black shoes, the ones he normally wore. It must be a special day, he must be heading to something important after work. Some sort of meeting? No, that wouldn't really make sense, you all didn't work in a field where meetings were held outside of work hours, in restaurants or bars. Unless the meeting was about getting out of here, finding another placement. Maybe a date? Who'd want to date such an asshole, though?

He was rich and good-looking. Even you could recognize that. And boy did it irk you, that he looked so good in his suits, that he wasn't too masculine or too feminine, that his nose sloped in just the perfect way, that his smile was soft and bright and so endearing. You hadn't met many people in your life who were so captivating at first glance, and sure, when he'd first started here a part of you hoped something might happen between the two of you. You'd eat lunch at each other's desks, excitedly discussing your newest grants or talking about your favorite shows, which of course, were the same. It was a blissful few weeks, a beautiful honeymoon of sorts. Of course it couldn't last forever; you landed your dream job, everything you'd been working towards finally coming true last year, a new perfect apartment with your best friend being the cherry on top. Of course this year a man appeared and tried to ruin everything.

The two of you work in silence until 7:45, when everyone else starts arriving for the day, led of course by Dr. Acharya, the supervising psychotherapist. Next is Tally, who gives you a short wave as she heads to reception, her horn-rimmed glasses peeking over the window to blow you a kiss when she finds the mug of tea you'd made waiting for her. Soon many others scramble in together; Marnie, Amir, Rua, and Keisha, each making their way to their individual offices to ready themselves for their first clients. Soon Jongho, in charge of billing and accounting, walks in too, sitting down at his desk next to Yunho. And finally Eliana stumbles in just before eight, her giant coffee in hand, her eyes slightly dark with panic like they always are as she rushes into her office. Your boss, Mr. Kangsoo, won't be in for another hour at least and the day lurches forward as the first clients of the day are brought back for their counseling sessions, the office breaking into a low hum that will stay with you until you leave.

Your digitizing task today is boring but necessary, and that headache isn't leaving you, even with the tea warming your throat and your favorite piano concerto comforting you through the morning. You always loved Rachmaninov in the winter. But even so, your mood was sour, too sour. Yunho and Jongho's comfortable chatter was making your blood boil, making it hard for you to focus on your stupid, tedious task. In a huff you stand, heading straight for the reception office, papers in hand.

"Hi hi," Tally greets you as you open her door, gently closing it behind you.

"Dude, I'm dreading this meeting," you say immediately, sighing.

"Why? I'm sure nothing bad will come of it, Mr. Kangsoo loves you," she says, canceling an appointment on her screen and typing out a note.

"I know, I'm just already pissy today, not exactly the best mood to be bringing to the boss's office," you chuckle, setting your papers on the corner of her desk. "I kept neglecting digitizing this pile and now I can't stop obsessing over it. And Yunho came in early today, and hid my fucking mug. Again."

"Did you see this?" she asks, grabbing a sticky note from the corner of her computer and holding it out to you.

Can you please let the pretty one know she's never driving me from this job, no matter how hard she tries?

"God he's such an ass," you whisper, making Tally giggle. "Thank god for you girl, I don't know what I'd do without you here."

"You're 100% sure it's Yunho?" she asks, eyeing you.

"Who else would it be?" you reply, rolling your eyes, making her laugh again. 

"Well, I guess now 'the pretty one' has been told," she giggles, rolling her eyes too as she crumples up the note and tosses it in the trash.

"Like I said, he's an ass," you reply, not as quietly this time. A parent obviously waiting for their child snaps their head up, looking in your direction. They're maybe twenty feet away, and the window between the lobby and the reception desk is small, so you doubt they really heard you. But you balk in embarrassment anyway, silencing yourself.

"I should get back to my desk, I guess," you say, sighing as you pick up your stack of papers once again.

"Just ignore him," Tally says, smiling kindly.

"I'll try," you sigh, earning a disapproving look from Tally. "I will, I promise. You're right, I know, I should just ignore him," you answer, looking over to see the back of his head, his large hands crossed over each other and resting there on his jet black hair.  Fuck him, you can't help but think. Everything had been going so well, and you'd never been someone who got into drama at work, ever. It was a point of pride for you for a long time, a huge reason why your boss gave you the position he did and trusted you to be a part of his team. Now it had all been ruined, by this fucking asshole, in his perfectly tailored suits.

The day dragged on, your mind spinning with anxiety. It wouldn't leave you until that dreaded meeting, you knew that, so you busied yourself with scanning and organizing the files, not bothering to try to get any writing done. There was no way you would, not in this state.

Finally your boss arrived, his heavy footsteps sending waves of dread through you, your stomach a fluttering mess. You hadn't been able to eat this morning, which was very unlike you; you could feel how weak you were from the lack of sustenance, the adrenaline making you shakier than it normally did. You stumbled on wobbly legs towards his office once he called for you, Yunho's presence dark and foreboding behind you, and you swore you heard him whisper 'behave yourself' as the two of you passed into the office. Your blood was boiling as you sat down, the two chairs facing the front of your boss's desk, your face a permanent scowl as you stared Yunho down, watching him settle himself down in the chair and spread his legs farther than he needed to, looking all too comfortable.

"Ok, to start, this is not to scare you, or fire you," your boss begins, already zeroing in on the dynamic between you; the cool and collected look of Yunho, and the angry, stricken look of you, your eyes deep with worry when you meet your boss's gaze. "You both know me, I don't really do this sort of thing. I don't need to control you all, to be a good leader." He sighs deeply, looking almost as pained as you do, like he's mulled this over for too long himself. "I just can't let this go on any longer. The conflict between you two is affecting everyone, and it's clearly affecting your own work, too. I can see it in the quality of your writing. You are both very smart, very good grant writers, and even so you've been doing a good job, but I know you both can do better. And this fighting, it really needs to stop." He sighs deeply again, shaking his head subtly, like his subconscious is trying to rid itself of the stress you two have caused him. It makes so many feelings bloom in your guts, but the overwhelming one is guilt, the feeling so entirely consuming that you have the urge to jump to the floor now and start babbling out apologies. But you stop yourself, stop the tears from coming, and taking a deep breath you regain some composure. You know your boss, and you know his cadence, so you know he has more to say.

"So, we're figuring this out today. I don't care what it takes, we're settling this. So tell me, why do you two fight so much?" His eyes sweep back and forth, eyeing each of you for any sign, any subtle movement that could give him some idea of what was going on. He had his own theories, but he really couldn't be sure, and due to his laid back nature with his staff, he hadn't been monitoring you two enough to really know. With a sigh he leans back in his chair, letting the silence hang in the room until one of you is willing to break it.

"Sir, I don't think she's liked me from the moment I started here," Yunho finally speaks up, leaning forward in his chair and setting his elbows on his knees, the casual and confident gesture making your skin crawl. "I think she's been trying to make me miserable, so I'll leave-"

"That is not tru-"

"I think she feels some sort of ownership here, cause she's worked here so much longer than m-"

"That is absolutely not true!" you cry, your shot nerves leaving you unable to control your volume. "I would never try to run someone out of the office that way, that's completely unprofessional! He's the one who started all of this, he's the one who leaves nasty notes for me and hides my things and puts me down constantly in every admin meeting, trying to make me look like an idiot in front of everyone! If we're really gonna go there, I think he feels intimidated by my experience here, by the fact that I have a clearly established relationship with everyone, that you and all the therapists like me, and that even though he has more experience than me I'm still writing better grants!"

"Y/n, please keep yo-" your boss starts.

"I'm sorry, sir, but he left a note for me on Tally's computer this morning! How unprofessional is that! Now he's dragging her into our drama too, which I promise you I've never done! I-"

"Oh sure, you've never complained about me to anyone in the office," Yunho juts in, rolling his eyes. "It's not like everyone here sides with you on everything, always. If it weren't for Jongho I think you would have made everyone in this office hate me by now."

"Everyone loves you here, what do you mean?" you shoot back, your eyebrows furrowed in frustration. "I never talk about you to any of them, not even Tally. Because I know it would be wrong. Maybe everyone sides with me on certain issues because I'm right, have you ever considered that?! And by the way, Tally thinks poorly of you because of her own observations, because she doesn't like the things you say to me. So that has everything to do with you and your shitty behavior-" you cut yourself off, slapping a hand over your mouth. Because as comfortable as you are with your boss, you never, ever curse in front of him. It's an unspoken rule in the office, and one you'd never struggled to follow before. Shame washes over you like a wave of boiling water, making your whole body begin to shake.

"I'm so sorry, sir," you bow your head to him, your eyes closed as you fight to keep yourself from bursting into tears.

"She's obviously quite emotionally unstable, sir," Yunho pipes up from beside you, and of all the things he's said recently it's definitely the most hurtful. Your head shoots up, a single tear racing down your cheek despite your attempts to keep it at bay, and you just stare at him, your face betraying everything you're feeling.

"There's no need for that sort of insult right now, Yunho," your boss scolds him. "I need you two to resolve this, not fight even more. So tell me about this note, what did it say? Why did you leave a note for y/n on Tally's desk?"

"I'm sorry sir, I understand," Yunho responds, his perfectly respectful tone and gestures looking so put on. "And honestly sir, I have no idea what y/n is talking about. I didn't leave any notes for anyone this morning."

"Oh, so you're going to lie right to our boss's face?" you ask him, your volume lower but your anger still evident. "Do I need to go grab Tally? Seriously?"

"Did this note have my name on it anywhere?" he chuckles, fixing you with a strong gaze. And if you aren't mistaken, there's some sort of twinkle in his eye, almost like he's enjoying this. Is it seeing you suffer, seeing the anger and sadness in your eyes that makes him feel joy? Or maybe it's just messing with you in front of your boss, forcing you to over-explain yourself to the point of looking hysterical. Whatever it is it makes you uneasy, your stomach feeling like it might fall out of your ass at any moment.

"Sir, it said, 'Can you please let the pretty one know she's never driving me from this job, no matter how hard she tries?" you say, exasperated. "He just said he thinks I've been trying to drive him out. It was obviously him who left that note." You turn your body to face your boss again, not wanting to catch even a glimpse of Yunho anymore, your eyes pleading with Mr. Kangsoo to believe you.

"Sir, I did not write that. I would never say something so inappropriate about a coworker," Yunho adds, and though you don't see it, he's staring right at you. Your boss sighs heavily, your eyes fixed to the way he's staring at Yunho, the lines in his forehead deep with frustration. He looks like he's about to start speaking but then stops himself, another deep breath moving through his lungs, before running his hands through his hair and leaning back in his chair again.

"God, I wish you two would just sleep with each other already and get it out of your systems," he groans under his breath, but you hear it loud and clear, your whole body on high alert.

"What?!" you snap, your response involuntary. You had respected this man for years, admired the way he ran this office with calm confidence and respect for everyone, and you couldn't believe something so inappropriate had just come out of his mouth.

"Y/n, I'm sorry, I don't mean to be gross. I just can't help but wonder if part of the issue between the two of you is, well, the obvious attraction," Mr. Kangsoo responds, sighing deeply. "I do sincerely apologize if I'm reading things incorrectly, or if that last comment made you uncomfortable. I don't in any way want to encourage my employees to sleep with each other, obviously, and that just slipped out of my mouth. It was inappropriate, I know. I just feel like I'm at my wit's end with you two, and I feel desperate to find some sort of solution. Because you both are incredible employees and I don't want to have to get rid of either of you."

"I'm so sorry sir, that this whole situation with us two has caused you stress, but I can assure you there's no attraction here. Only dislike," you reply, letting out a shaky breath.

"No attraction at all, sir," Yunho adds, making you feel disgusted at actually agreeing with him for once.

"Then why the constant arguing?" your boss asks.

"Like I said sir, he's been tormenting me-"

"She clearly has something against me sir, and I don't know what I could do to change tha-"

"You don't know what you could do?? Maybe stop being so mean to me!" you cry out again.

"Y/n, keep your voice down, this is my last warning," your boss cuts in, his face stern. "You know I see you as almost a daughter to me, you started working here when you were what, 17? And now you've finished your degree, made so many strides in the last few years. I'm proud of you and everything you've accomplished, but I'm struggling to feel proud right now, with how you've been acting recently in the office. It isn't like you. I know Yunho is at fault for this too, and I want you to know I've already talked to him about his comments made during our admin meetings. What he said a few weeks ago, insinuating that you didn't understand the "actual point" of your role in this company because you have less experience than him, was uncalled for. So was his comment earlier. But I see too that you are quick to jump on everything he says, to assume that everything he does has ill intent towards you, and I don't think that that's fair either. I know you're more mature than this," he finishes, his eyes soft as he looks at you.

"I don't think I am, sir," you squeak out, your voice breaking as more tears well in your eyes.

"Y/n, I won't have this. I need you to approach this like you've approached everything else in your life, with the goal of actually understanding it. Don't give up on this now," he says, his voice stern but encouraging in that special way only he can be.

"Sir, how am I supposed to feel watching you accept her hysterics?" Yunho asks, his face tense with annoyance.

"God, you're cruel," you whisper, curling into a ball on your chair, not caring that you're wearing a short skirt and you probably shouldn't be holding your legs this way.

"Yunho, you're getting on my last fucking nerve today," your boss snaps, and both of you have wide eyes of shock, Mr. Kangsoo not one to curse in the office, either. "This entire conversation went worse than I expected, and your uncalled for comments show me that maybe you're not as mature as I originally thought you were. You came in with great references, son, and you clearly are very smart, but you must realize you're up against someone who's been working for me for six years, and who has proven time and time again to be basically the perfect employee. This conflict is a blip on the radar for her, but for you it's been happening almost the entire time I've known you. I want to believe the best in you, but you must understand how this looks from my perspective."

You both just sit frozen, like two kids in time-out, your faces different versions of disappointment. Your eyes are slightly red from crying, and your knees are still pulled up to your chin, your arms squeezing so tightly around them that it hurts.

"I've had it with this conversation, I don't think this is going to work. Which I should have known, it's clear that conversation between the two of you always leads to conflict," your boss continues. "I'm sending you both home, right now, and I'm demanding that you figure out this thing between you, or I'm firing you both. You have a week. Do not return to this office until the two of you have sorted out your issues, and can promise me you will not fight ever again going forward," he states, his arms crossed over his chest.

You both gawk at him, your faces looking almost identical, as you try to take in what he's just told you.

"Sir, I-" Yunho starts, but even he's stumbling over his words with just how shocked he is. "I don't think this is fair, sir. You should- you can't force us to make up, that isn't going to happen. This- we- we'll both be fired by next week," he stumbles out, his collected demeanor finally shattering.

"With all due respect, son, this is my company. I can do what I want. And this is what I feel is best. So both of you go, now, I won't hear another word. Out," he demands, standing and nodding towards his door.

You rise without a word, your body shaking dramatically from the heaps of adrenaline still coursing through you. Silently you grab your coat and scarf, packing up your bag and slinging it over your shoulder, walking to the kitchen to grab your lunch out of the fridge. You make your way towards the front door, stopping briefly at reception to look at Tally, her curly hair hanging down as she furiously types away at a document. Finally she looks up and sees your face, her own twisting into concern and confusion.

"What happened?" she whispers.

"I- I don't know," you respond, shaking your head. "Ask boss about it, I'm sure he'll tell you," you sigh, wiping another tear from your eyes. "I can't stay, I have to go," you squeak, giving her a quick hug, before turning and walking towards the front door again, nearly bumping into Yunho. You don't give him the courtesy of an apology, instead storming past him, walking angrily towards the elevator.

And of course you take the elevator down together, the silence awkward and tense and indescribable. You know he'll probably be walking down to the subway station with you, and it doesn't even surprise you when he gets on the same line as you, heading the same direction. But when he gets off at the same exact stop and you feel him walking up the stairs behind you, you can't just accept it any longer.

"Are you fucking following me?" you spit over your shoulder, your eyes dark with anger.

"No, y/n, I live up this way," he retorts, pointing ahead of you two in the exact direction of your neighborhood.

"God, don't tell me we're neighbors," you groan, trudging down the street, the remnants of last week's snow still stuck in the gutters.

"You live in Arbol Village?" he asks, almost sounding impressed.

"On Maple street," you sigh, with a nod.

"Me too," he chuckles, shaking his head in disbelief.

"This isn't funny, you fucking psychopath," you retort, angry that he's still here in your proximity, and angrier that there's only one path up into your neighborhood from this side, and the hill that leads up is making you out of breath in a way that's nothing but embarrassing.

"And you say I'm the mean one," he responds, smiling as he shakes his head.

"I really don't get how you can be so blasé about this," you huff out, your footsteps heavy as you nearly crest the hill and enter your neighborhood.

"Workplaces are shit, this is how it goes. If I have to find another job, I will. But don't think I won't go down without a fight. Mr. Kangsoo is by far the best boss I've ever worked for, so I'm going to do whatever I can to keep my position," he says, his breathing annoyingly stable even after walking the entirety of the hill. Slowly you two start into the neighborhood, but suddenly he's turning down a path towards the second house on Maple Street, the large dark one with an almost Victorian structure. 

"Of course the fancy one is your house," you sigh, seeing the ornate curtains covering only part of the front window.

"Come in, we need to talk more," Yunho says, beckoning you with his hands, but you can't be bothered. 

"Fuck no, are you crazy?" you respond, already stomping down the sidewalk past his house, not bothering to look back. The last thing you could bear is his presence right now, and for some reason you feel like you're not totally in control of yourself anyway, your legs moving so firmly they'd probably still be going even if you protested. Yunho just sighs, himself drained from the meeting you'd just left, and not having the energy to fight more. Later today, or tomorrow morning, he promised himself, he'd call you and start sorting this out for good. But for now he just watched you grow smaller and smaller, your hair blowing gently behind you in the winter breeze, your legs looking weak.

Once you were home, two and a half blocks from your asshole of a coworker, you collapsed on your bed, passing out in moments. In the late afternoon you woke to the sound of the front door slamming shut, your roommate, Yunji, calling, "shit, sorry! The wind is crazy out there!"

"You're good!" you called back, but your voice made it apparent to her that it was one of those days where you needed to be left alone, so she didn't come into your room. You picked yourself up and stripped off your work clothes, finally freeing your thighs of the tight elastics that held up your socks, two red rings now visible on your skin. Automatically you brushed your teeth, grabbing your comfiest hoodie and sweatpants, and passed out in your bed again, not even eating dinner, not checking your phone. The sun had already begun to set, the sky outside rearing for another stormy night, and your body was lulled to sleep within minutes, your head buried deep into your pillows as you pulled your comforter over your head.

You woke in what felt like minutes, your room eerily quiet. The light looked bright outside, very bright; it was disorienting, both the quiet and the light, and you lifted yourself up, squinting around in search of your phone. You'd forgotten to plug it in last night, so it surely would be almost dead. You found it still in your work bag, hanging on for dear life with the battery at five percent. The time astonished you, 9am, and you gawked at yourself. No wonder you felt so disoriented; you'd been sleeping for nearly sixteen hours.

And as you finally sorted through your notifications, your shock over the time left your brain entirely. Because the shock of having a missed call from Yunho, having two missed calls from him, floored you, literally. You sank down to the ground, furiously clicking to see the times. One was last night, at about 7pm, and the other was this morning about an hour ago. This morning he'd left a voicemail too, presumably right after you hadn't answered. With shaky hands you clicked on it, holding the phone tight to your ear so you wouldn't miss a word.

"Y/n, I know you don't like talking to me, but we really should try to sort this out earlier rather than later. Please call me back as soon as you get this."

Well, fuck.

He sounded disappointed, and frustrated, and perturbed to even be leaving the message. But god was that voice convincing, even to you, the way he worded things so eloquently and politely, like he's genuinely a good and thoughtful person. It hit you hard while listening that maybe your anger wasn't justified, maybe you'd been unfair to him like your boss had said. The sneaking feeling had graced you many times over your months of conflict, but now it felt too strong to ignore. Did he really want to sort this out? It sounded like it. Why, why, why was this so damn confusing for you?

Your mind raced as your stomach growled, as you tried to get ahold of yourself. Still sprawled out on your carpet you felt exhausted, your body somehow still feeling pulled towards sleep despite the hoards of it you'd just been allotted. You peeled yourself up, standing carefully, moving towards your window to get a view of the backyard. Looking at the garden always calmed you, even in the winter when most of the flowers were gone. And as you opened your blinds you realized why things seemed so bright this morning, and why you were barely hearing a sound.

A thick blanket of snow covered everything, flakes still falling gently from the sky which was dotted with clouds. The sun shone through a gap in them, reflected bright off the entirely white ground. You breathed out a sigh of relief, knowing that everyone had been forced to stay home today, so your missing work wasn't really a disruption to the office. Whoever was miffed about having to take your early shift wouldn't have to, after all. It was like the world was granting you a favor, as you often felt that she did, and you were so thankful. Because this, too, was a great excuse to avoid Yunho longer. There was no way you could leave the house with so much snow outside; it wasn't safe. You breathed in a sigh of relief, shaking it out as you finally connected your phone to charge, slipping on some thick socks and gliding your way out to the kitchen.

After breakfast you popped back into your room, shooting off a quick text.

Y/n: I just saw the snow, I don't think I can come over. Let's see tomorrow.

Almost immediately a call comes through from him, but you let it ring out. There was no way you were going to waste this beautiful snow day talking to him, and you had a whole week to resolve this anyway. It gnawed at you, in the back of your mind somewhere, but presently you just couldn't find it in yourself to voluntarily speak to him.

Yunho: We can still talk on the phone. And we really should. Y/n: We should take a break from talking and cool off. For today.

That was how you were justifying it to yourself. You needed a break, deserved a break from him. You wouldn't be able to really resolve anything if you were still pissed, and with the shock of the morning's weather and your body's obvious need for even more rest, you just couldn't take it today. Plus, everyone else was getting a day off, why couldn't you?

Yunho: I disagree

You flip your phone over, setting it on your bedside table, and you walk away. You'd had it with him arguing with you over text too, and the idea of curling up on the couch with Yunji, sipping hot cocoa and watching your favorite movies, sounded too enticing. You were not going to think about him anymore today. It was decided.

And surprisingly you were mostly able to keep your promise to yourself, the day passing in all its wintery glory, your favorite tradition with your roommate leaving you just as content as it always did. With a gentle sigh you both finally stood up, moving to the kitchen to wash the dishes you'd made all day, finally putting away the snacks you'd covered the coffee table with. As you both walked past the window in the hall you stopped short, eyes fixed on the scene unfolding before you.

"Holy shit," Yunji said, grabbing onto your arm. You both were used to the snow here, having grown up in the next town over. But this snow, that now seemed to be three feet deep, was something you hadn't seen since the one glorious winter more than a decade ago. You were eight that year, and the day after Christmas it snowed furiously, continuing all the way until New Year's Day when the ground was so covered that everywhere you looked outside all you saw was white.

You hadn't realized it was snowing all day, that the sky had turned dark in the early afternoon with all of the cloud cover. You were both too engrossed in your fun to notice.

"Well, I guess we're not going back to work for another few days," she laughed, sighing at how lovely it looked.

"Thank god," you replied, sighing in relief.

"Has Yunho been giving you trouble again?" she asked, and you turned to her with a downturned smile.

"When is he not," you sighed, laughing.

"Hey, how did your meeting go, yesterday?" she asked.

"Fucking terrible," you reply, a frustrated hand running through your hair.

"What happened?"

"Boss said that if the two of us can't resolve our differences, he's letting us both go," you answer, sighing harshly.

"Oh my god, that's crazy! How could he do that to you??" she replied, eyes wide.

"Girl, I know. I don't even know how it got to this point."

She moved to hug you, knowing just how much this situation had weighed on you, and just how much your job meant. She'd seen it in your eyes, even if you hadn't always told her exactly what was going on. She knew how sensitive you were, and she couldn't believe your boss would say such a thing. Especially given the years of dedication you'd given to that office, that you so genuinely cared about.

"What are you gonna do?" she asks, pulling back. 

"Well I guess, try to resolve it. I don't know how, though, every time we talk he just pisses me off and we fight. He's not reasonable about anything. He's always joking, nothing is ever totally serious. I saw him stutter for the first time yesterday, when Mr. Kangsoo gave us that ultimatum, but earlier in the meeting he was way too casual about everything. He was calling me hysterical and unstable, and, just, how the fuck does my boss think I'm going to solve this? That man is fucking impossible," you say, shaking your head.

"He sounds like a sociopath," she replies. "If I ever see him I will wring his neck, I swear to god."

"Well, you might. He lives in this neighborhood." Yunji's eyes go wide at your comment, her mouth hanging open. "Yeah, I know. He lives on our street, too, you know the fancy looking house that's second in from the road? Like if you're walking from the station this direction, the second house on the right? Yeah, that's his. I found out yesterday when I was walking home."

"How the fuck does a single guy in his twenties afford that?" she asks, baffled.

"He clearly has family money, he must. I'm sure he's made decent money for the past few years, but not enough to afford that. And all of his stuff, his suits and his briefcase and everything, looks expensive. And it's not like, shit that just looks expensive or name brand stuff. It's subtler than that, it just seems like everything he owns is so high quality."

"Fucking rich boys. I guess it isn't surprising, given how he's behaved. Like he's always gotten his way and never been told no."

"It really seems like it. Everyone always loves him, it's so annoying," you roll your eyes, thinking of every other staff member's reaction to meeting their shiny new coworker, and his easy demeanor, always saying what people want to hear. Except to you, it seemed.

"Well you can't really meet up and talk right now," Yunji says.

"No, but he said we should talk on the phone. I missed two calls from him, and he left me a message. But I can't bear to speak with him on the phone. I don't ever talk to my coworkers outside of work, no matter how close we are," you reply, shaking your head. "It just feels weird. I don't know what I'm gonna do, but I'm ignoring him for the rest of today."

"Understandable," she responds, squeezing your arm for a moment. "I should try to get some work done on my thesis, I guess, but you rest this evening. You deserve it."

As you both retire to your rooms, you sigh into your pillow. Despite the lazy day, despite the sixteen hours of sleep last night, you still feel tired. It must be mental, it's the only explanation at this point. And you know that means you should probably avoid your phone. But you reflexively check it; the anticipation brewing in your head isn't letting up.

You find two more missed calls from Yunho, and another text.

Yunho: How are we going to solve this if you keep ignoring me?

You suppose it makes you feel a little bad, a little guilty. Still, you can't be bothered to respond. You don't know why; you can't explain it. That feeling like you're not totally in control of your actions, like someone else is calling the shots, is back, and it really doesn't feel like something you can fight, or should fight. There's an eeriness about it, but it's so far in the back of your mind that you don't give it a second thought. After turning over your phone you climb into your covers, the light barely there outside as the evening approaches, the sky still covered in dark clouds and the snow still falling.

And just like that, two days pass. The snow has stayed heavy, making it unsafe to leave, the whole city quiet as few feel brave enough to venture outside. A desperate run to the grocery store calls a few, but thankfully you and Yunji have plenty of food in the pantry to last you a few days. She's taken the opportunity to really focus on her work, and you thought maybe you should, too. You never worked on grants at home, but you could bet Yunho was also taking advantage of the quiet time. You didn't really have anything better to do, yet you couldn't bring yourself to work at all, not when your head and gut were rolling with anxiety and fear and a crushing hatred of yourself. That first day avoiding Yunho had felt, well, not good, but justified. But the past two days, more missed calls and texts unanswered, you felt straight up guilty, and stupid. Not really for ignoring Yunho, as much as letting down your boss, which you knew you would. This couldn't be resolved; no matter what the two of you did you'd never get along, and it was clear that there was something in Yunho that made him unable to leave you alone. You hadn't particularly liked the last guy in his position, either, but the two of you had basically ignored each other, easily. But since his entrance to your office, Yunho seemed unable to not bother you, not leave notes, not piss you off every chance he got. And now you couldn't help but ignore him, even though you knew that doing so was fucking you both over, making it certain that you'd never return to that beloved office and your dream job.

You felt stuck. The literal fact of not being able to leave your apartment was eating you alive, making you feel scared and paranoid and vulnerable in ways you knew were illogical. Every little sound started to make you jump; you were losing it, slowly but surely coming apart at the seams. You swore you started hearing your mom's cat meowing for you, and once in the kitchen it sounded so real you spent minutes furiously searching the hall and your bedroom for her. You collapsed on the floor, waves of anxiety rolling over you as you held yourself in the fetal position, not even crying, just hyperventilating.

Yunho: You're being really immature and unfair by not responding to me. Not even giving this a chance of maybe working itself out

You hadn't responded to him in days, but something in you finally broke. It was in the way his words reflected how you felt about yourself, and the severe guilt that it brought you alighted in flames and suddenly felt like nothing but red, hot anger.

Y/n: Fuck you Yunho: Oh, so you are alive

Breathing heavy you stared at the screen, a sudden realization washed over you. You knew it was over; you'd maintained at least some level of professionalism up to this point, albeit not much, with him. Even when you fought in the office you didn't say anything personal or unnecessarily nasty. You only cursed at him under your breath, never loud enough that anyone could hear. But now you had said something nasty, in writing no less. Even if you both somehow made it back to work on Monday, he'd no doubt show your boss what you had said. And even with your long standing relationship with Mr. Kangsoo, you doubted he'd be willing to keep you on after seeing that.

So that was it. It was over. Logically you knew that you could find a new job, that this wasn't the end of your life. The new year was right around the corner, which was always a good time to find new placements. But you had studied communications and psychology specifically for this job, had dedicated years to learning everything you could about funding and mental health care and the ways your boss ran the office. Though it'd never been said directly, you had a feeling that one day you'd become his second-in-command, and maybe even take over running the place once he was ready to take a step back and retire. You loved this part of the city, loved living with your best friend here, and the commute was easy. You'd planned everything so well, yet it still was about to crumble in your hands. And with every passing minute, it felt like you were waiting for your life to implode, which made not being able to leave all the worse.

The next morning you woke to a call from your mom.

"Good morning," she answered, after your muffled and confused, hello? "Happy New Year sweetie."

"Hi mom, Happy New Year," you responded, rolling over to tuck yourself into the covers again. It had gotten bone-chillingly cold with the perpetual precipitation, and pulling the covers off in the morning felt torturous.

"Since you can't come down to see me today I thought I'd call. Are you two doing okay? Do you have enough food?"

"Yeah, we're doing fine," you say through a yawn. "We've got plenty of food, as long as this lets up in a few days."

"God, it better. I'm glad I got to see you on Christmas Eve."

"Me too."

"Are you doing okay? You sound off," she asks you, making your heart sink. She has no idea what's been going on; you've done an expert job of keeping it a secret from her, as you often do with your struggles, because you know she can't really handle it. You know she has too much to deal with on her own, and you never really feel like she gives you good advice, anyway. But with how you've been feeling mentally, hearing someone ask that has you panicking internally.

"Oh yeah, I'm fine, I just woke up is all," you lie, yawning again to punctuate your point. "I'm not really enjoying being stuck inside, I guess."

"That's not like you," your mom laughs, and you know she's shaking her head side to side the way she always does. "You used to always love when you were stuck inside, or stranded somewhere. Do you remember when you got lost at that theme park in Ocean City? When we found you at the ticket booth you were happy as can be. We thought we'd find you crying. The teenage boy who was watching you said you were quiet as can be, just sat in that little nook in total silence. You were such a funny kid." There's a mystical air to her tone telling the story, because she loves to reminisce in that way, and unfortunately you really, really don't. Because that was the time of your life when your dad was still around, and despite the years of therapy you still can't move past it all. 

"Yeah, I remember," you placate her, sighing. You wish you could travel to see her today, just to calm her nerves and make her not worry, because her worrying is the absolute last thing you want. As you stare out the window you see the sky is a bit clearer, and there don't appear to be many flakes still falling. But the snow is still thick and there's surely ice everywhere. You're not even sure if the three separate subway lines you have to take to reach her house are still running.

"Well, sweetie, the weather report said the snow's finally supposed to let up today, so maybe you can get some fresh air soon."

"That sounds good," you mutter, rolling over in bed. "I should go make some breakfast, I'm feeling really hungry. Thanks for calling, love you," you finish the call.

"Okay, love you too sweetie. Talk to you soon," she replies, before you hang up the call.

New Year's Day. You'd forgotten yesterday what day it was, and had been sort of avoiding your phone because of Yunho's texts and calls. You hadn't stayed up till midnight, hadn't welcomed the New Year in any way. You were surprised Yunji hadn't said anything, but then again neither of you really were the types to party or celebrate holidays much. You both had bad memories of them from growing up, or good memories that had turned bad once you'd matured and looked back without your naiveté. And your face and posture were probably screaming 'leave me alone,' Yunji always able to tell if you were upset. You were thankful for that, thankful that she knew how to leave you alone when you needed the space. Really, what did it matter what day it was? New Year's was like any other day of the year, it just had the honor of being first in the lineup. So why was your head spinning so much? Why couldn't you stop thinking about what your resolutions should be?

The morning was strange, even with a delicious bagel and a warm cup of Jasmine tea. It felt strange seeing the sky after it had been covered for days; it even felt strange looking out your living room window to the front yard, the snow on the street gray and muddy and pounded down by the tracks of the few brave souls who'd trekked out or driven in this weather. You saw one neighbor diligently shoveling snow off her driveway, bundled up head to toe in a giant puffy jacket and boots that looked too big for her. Her head snaps up, and you walk towards the window to see what she's seeing; a snow plow was making its way down your street, the drivers finally able to start their work today now that the worst of the storm was behind you. Even the sidewalks looked not so bad, as the clear day had allowed the sun to begin melting the thick snow, the air hot enough that it might not be too icy out there. Something in you called at you to go outside, but the second you thought about it a wave of dread hit you, and you knew you'd be too scared. It would be another day stuck in here, another day avoiding Yunho's texts and feeling so guilty, and you weren't sure if you could take it.

It had gotten to that point now. It had been so long since you felt like this, like you'd rather die than live another moment. Now, just like the first time, you felt so ridiculous and shameful for feeling that way, looking around to see the physical evidence of your privileged life. Your safe and cozy apartment, the food filling the fridge, the brand new washing machine you'd both bought yourselves as a Christmas gift. How could this be so awful? You had all sorts of entertainment, anything you could need to keep you busy while you waited for these snow days to end. You could be updating your resume, starting the search for a new job. You could be calling Yunho back, and trying to find a way through your conflict. You could be doing yoga, meditating, making soup from scratch, reading, writing, learning a new language...

It all sounded horrible. Your mind was collapsing on you, but this time you're not a kid, this time you don't have a great excuse. You'd let some petty drama taint your every waking moment, and you didn't have anyone to blame but yourself. You were too scared to do the right thing, you could see that now, that back when this conflict had started you'd assumed your boss and everyone else would side with you, just because they already knew you. You'd let Yunho get under your skin, to the point that every word he uttered made you angry, letting him in so deep that there was no way out. Not now. You knew this wouldn't be resolved, because you couldn't do it; you could never admit these things to him that you'd just admitted to yourself. You could never apologize, never acknowledge that you played a part. You'd sat yourself staunchly in a position, the innocent one who'd been wronged time and time again by the aggressor, and stepping down from that pedestal would hurt you more than you thought you could bear.

It was the shame of fucking up. Of not being perfect. A conversation from therapy, from almost ten years ago, ricocheted to the front of your mind. 'You're quite a perfectionist, y/n. Do you realize that? It makes you avoid doing certain things, even if you know they're the right thing to do.' You can still see your old therapist's face, her glasses near the tip of her nose as she eyed you. How could you still be right where your fourteen year old self was? You looked like her too, your skin burning with embarrassment at how you hadn't realized that yourself. It felt humiliating to have to be told, because that in and of itself proved you were imperfect. That you weren't totally and completely self aware. The biggest shame you carried was knowing that despite how hard you tried, you never were very good at knowing yourself. 

You laid face down on your bedroom floor. You didn't have the energy or motivation for anything else. You knew clinically speaking, this looked like the start of a depressive episode. But you hadn't had one in years now and were out of practice. What were you supposed to do now? All that felt okay was sinking more into your head, letting the darkness envelop your mind and take you on a ride through your worst memories, your heart racing despite your complete lack of physical exertion.

By early afternoon you'd had enough of that horrifying roller coaster. When you sat up your neck ached, your body screaming at you to never collapse in that position again. You felt jittery, restless, but nothing at home sounded appealing still, not in the slightest. Your eyes catch on your winter boots in the corner of your room, too big to fit on the shoe rack by the front door. And suddenly your mind is made up in less than a second. It was time to go for a walk, to get out of the house. Maybe the cold air would clear your mind.

"Hey, I'm gonna go grab some snacks at Smith's, do you need anything?" you call through Yunji's bedroom door.

"You're going out in this weather?" she asks, opening it.

"The snow let up a lot today, and I'm running low. And I'm feeling too cooped up. It's only five blocks, I'm sure I'll be fine."

"Ok, well, I don't think I need anything. I stocked up on Pocky last time we were there. Are we almost out of toilet paper or paper towels?" she asks.

"No, I just checked," you respond.

"Okay. Be careful," she says, smiling.

"I will, I promise," you say before walking toward the front closet, grabbing your big winter coat and zipping it up.

The outside air is a shock as it greets your face, making your cheeks turn pink almost instantly. The world is still bright, the sun shining the warmest it will all day, but you can see darker clouds off in the distance. You hope they aren't moving too fast; there is only a slight breeze in the air, and mostly it's just so quiet, even with a second snow plow heading down your street. It does feel relieving, a least a little, to finally be outside, and a part of you feels proud for actually going out, given how scared you were this morning. You feel like you're maybe proving to yourself that you aren't such a wuss, that you aren't so prone to avoiding things that one day it'll ruin your life. You walk briskly, your nerves buzzing as your heart rate rises to keep you warm.

It feels nice to be buying your favorite snacks, and you're able to get lost in the normalcy of it for a few minutes. The store is almost empty, so you try making light conversation with the one cashier working, his long hair covered in a beanie. Strolling back outside you're met with the chilly air again, a gust of wind nearly knocking you off your feet as you make your way through the small, empty parking lot. You could have sworn you were only in there for maybe ten or fifteen minutes, but the sky looks almost completely different now, those dark clouds having descended on your area. You start your way back up the hill, bracing yourself against the growing winds, when the sky lets out a low rumble that shakes you to your bones. Suddenly it's raining, the air warm enough to turn the snow into sleet, and it's soaking your face and your hat and your gloves faster than you can believe. The paper bag holding your snacks is disintegrating in your hand, and you shove it under your coat to try to protect it, the cold bag on your stomach making you shiver.

"Fuck, this was a bad idea," you mutter to yourself, shakily making your way finally into your neighborhood, crossing the street that separates the houses from the row of commercial buildings. Your whole body is shaking, your head turned to the ground as you try to avoid getting sleet in your eyes and try to avoid falling. You're moving much slower than you were on your way to the store, carefully planting your feet one in front of the other as you hold your snacks against your stomach. Your brain feels fuzzy, the wind whipping past your ears, and all you can manage to think is, 'just make it home, just make it home.' It's only about three more blocks, you should be able to make it just fine, if you just keep putting one foot in front of the other, if you just keep going, keep goin-

Suddenly someone has grabbed you, your body thrown up like a rag doll, your upper half thrown over their shoulder. You let out a guttural scream, the sound hoarse and weak and getting lost in the storm. You're furiously flailing your legs, wiping the water from your eyes to try to get a look at anything, your lungs heaving as you scream again, this time, "Let me go!!"

The grip on your legs only tightens after your outburst, and then you're hearing a door whooshing open, warmer air greeting you as you enter some house, your eyes able to make out hardwood floors and the large boots of whoever's holding you hostage. You're breathing ragged, trying to get ahold of yourself and figure out where the hell you are, and when you catch a glimpse into the front closet of this house you see those navy blue shoes, with that very unique toe box...

Part 2

Thank you sm for reading! <3

[the-thing-withfeathers]

exceeded caution part 5

how dare you?

series masterlist | previous part | next part

a/n: ohhhh i had so much fucking fun with this chapter. i couldnt stop once i started. i hope u all enjoyyyy

pairing: ex!tara carpenter x f!reader into sam carpenter x f!reader

warnings: cursing, threatening language, mention of blood and violence, mention of sustained injuries, mention of stabbing. 3.9k words.

𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩

"i really don't want you doing this." you said to sam as you fixed the collar on her jacket, using your palm to flatten the fabric.

"i will be fine. and i'll be back in no time." sam placed her hand over yours. you just stared at your joined hands for a moment.

she noticed that you were starting to zone out and pressed a kiss to your forehead.

"it'll work. i know it will." she said, confidently.

"it might work. but at what risk?" you asked, finally making eye contact with her. "they're putting you out there like lambs for the slaughter. i don't want anything to happen to you or tara. it's not worth it."

sam placed a hand on your cheek, holding your attention.

"i'll take any chance to catch this motherfucker and put an end to this if it means we get to be together at the end."

god, you hated her.

"you'll need to be alive for that, samantha." you rolled your eyes at her.

"i will be alive. i promise."

𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩

you were sat in the back of a van while sam and tara wandered out in the open. you hated the idea of using them as bait. no matter how good kirby and detective bailey were at their jobs, you knew ghostface was always a few steps ahead.

as mindy and kirby butted heads over the plan, you glanced at ethan. the boy was shamelessly snacking on a bag of cheetos, how could he even stomach anything right now? he noticed your staring and turned the bag of cheetos to you, offering you some. you waved your hand to dismiss him and looked away.

you offered to join the two sisters in their escapade to gain an advantage over ghostface, but they didn't need you in an even worse state.

you realised that you didn't even have a theory as to who the killer could be. there were too many people around and too many things happening for you to even make a guess. you also wondered if anyone suspected you.

"heart of gold with a dark past." mindy said, describing you to tara and sam. "it's the perfect cover up."

"she's got a rock solid alibi." tara said, crossing her arms at mindy. the girl still held a protective nature for you. "i was breaking up with her."

"she still left after." mindy countered. "you never know. isn't it weird that she always just seems to be around when you need her most?"

sam hated to even consider that you were capable of taking a life. unfortunately, despite her growing feelings, she had to be cautious with you. that was one of the risks she had to ponder on after you two decided to take things further.

fortunately for you, she looked into your eyes enough to know that there was not a single murderous spark in that head of yours.

"this is exactly how our uncle randy died." mindy's frustrated voice echoed in the van, taking you out of your investigative headspace. "broad daylight, public place, yanked into a van." the girl's monologue was never-ending, she was hard to stop when she got like this.

"stab. stab. stab. no more randy!" she exclaimed.

"huh." kirby responded, seemingly ignoring mindy's efforts at pointing out flaws in the operation. she turned back to the computer in front of her. "hey sam? stay frosty out there, okay?"

"we're good." you heard her voice through the computer's soft speaker. the tone of her voice reassured you, you knew she just wanted this to end.

you leaned back against the wall of the van, letting out a small yawn. you can't remember the last time you got a decent sleep.

you heard a faint ringing. you sat up as sam picked up the phone.

"you're gonna die, you know?" you almost felt your attraction to her increasingly grow with her determination. but now wasn't the time to think about that.

kirby typed away on her computer, tracking the killer's location. you leaned forward, trying to hear better.

"for a mastermind, you’re not very bright. waiting for me to call, desperately hoping i’m nearby so the police can grab me." the voice changer was haunting, it was the type of voice that wouldn't leave your nightmares. he was terrifying, you had to give him that. "but i’m not nearby. i'm one step ahead. be seeing you, samantha."

hearing sam's full name come from ghostface sent chills down your spine. it was intense, like the name held a lot of weight.

he hung up just like that, you watched as kirby discovered his location. the radius slowly started to narrow down to the upper west side.

kirby informed the two girls that ghostface was nowhere near them.

"on west 96th?" tara asked, kirby furrowed her eyebrows.

"how did you know that?" kirby inquired.

"gale." sam spoke.

you thought back to how kirby turned gale away from joining everyone, how press wasn't allowed anywhere near this. while her action was valid, you now realise it may have turned around to bite her back harder.

you heard heavy breathing and footsteps from the other end of the comms, deducing that they were running.

"my friend danny works on the upper west side. he can get there quicker!" you heard sam say through her short breaths. you had only met danny a few times, you had no doubt that he was a good presence in the carpenter's lives. although, he was still a viable suspect. you know he had a history with sam, you couldn't tell if it was just jealousy or actual logic that caused you to suspect him.

"or he could finish her off! it's possible he's the killer." detective bailey had a point there, it was convenient that he just so happened to work in the area.

"fuck. we have to get there now." sam said, stopping in her tracks as bailey protested, asking her to take a minute.

the comms started to fizzle out suddenly, you realised it was because they were getting further away.

you couldn't help yourself and lunged out of the van you were sitting in. you looked around and scanned the area. you spotted bailey and squinted, only to see that there was a police vehicle driving away with it's sirens blaring. you had no doubt that it was tara's doing, she could be reckless when she wanted to be.

"fuck this." you mumbled, turning back around to kirby. "can you take us there?" kirby heard the worry laced in your voice, she sighed and nodded.

𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩

the car ride was silent, you sat in the passenger seat while the other three squeezed into the back seat. chad looked uncomfortable in the middle, seeing as he was the most built one out of all of them.

you jumped as your phone buzzed, you were doing that more often.

caller id — tara carpenter

you quickly answered.

"tara. are you okay?" you immediately asked. "is gale okay?"

"sam and i are fine. gale isn't. she's been hurt." tara answered your question.

"sit tight. we're almost there." you said.

"okay." tara sounded exhausted. this would have been extremely hard for the both of them. gale was someone that was there when this all started, despite their differences, she was a constant that they could depend on. "i'll see you soon..." tara proceeded to hang up the phone.

you turned to everyone else in the car. "gale's been hurt. i'm not sure how bad but we'll find out soon enough." you wished that there were no other cars present on the road. you wished that you could just plow through every other vehicle just to get there faster.

when you arrived, the sisters were standing shoulder to shoulder by the steps of the apartment complex.

sam looked like she had years taken off her lifespan. she was staring into nothing, her mind was racing and her shoulders were holding the weight of the world.

you hopped out of the car and felt your feet pick up the pace, you had to get to her as soon as possible.

as you crashed into the girl, you wrapped your arms around her neck, enveloping her into a hug. she took her hands out of her pockets and hugged your waist, her face burrowing itself into your neck. she inhaled deeply, taking in your scent and warmth. she felt herself relax a little more as she held you in your arms.

"i was so fucking worried about you both." you said, slowly pulling away to suddenly pull tara into a hug. she didn't expect it but she was pleasantly surprised. she hugged your waist and put her head on your chest. you were tall enough to rest your chin on her head. hearing your heartbeat was enough to calm her as well.

"any word on gale?" chad asked, walking up the stairs. you all collectively decided to sit on the couches that were in the lobby. you took a seat directly next to sam.

"she had a pulse the last time we saw her." tara cleared the air a bit more. "they said she's strong enough to pull through."

you sighed in relief. you spotted danny suddenly run into the building, breathless as he looked like he was running.

"i got here as fast as i could." he spoke in between breaths.

"did you?" tara asked, her tone accusatory.

had tara also been suspecting him? you had to give her credit for that. she was incredibly quick with picking up things like this. you glanced at danny and realised he was staring right at sam. was there still something lingering there? did sam have any lingering feelings? you wanted to pull her closer, stake some form of claim on her but you knew you had no right to do that just yet. instead, you settled for placing a hand on her upper arm.

"i'm scared. i don't wanna get hurt again." mindy said, her voice just barely above a whisper.

"neither do i." chad followed. mindy eyed him.

"i don't want you getting hurt again either." she told him.

"i know. i know." chad leaned his head on his sister's shoulder. as much as they butted heads, they loved each other more than anyone.

tara leaned her head on mindy's shoulder too. a part of you would have loved to be there when they were all happy together, enjoying life as normal teenagers back in woodsboro. maybe then you'd be able to understand them.

"so what do we do now?" chad asked, turning to sam.

"maybe he gets to win this time." sam said, softly. your eyes flickered to her, your eyebrows furrowing at her statement. win? what did she mean by that?

tara, mindy, and chad had the same expression as you. they raised their heads to look at sam, confused looks on their faces.

"he wants to punish me." your was pushed away as she stood up from her seat. "me." you saw tears starting to pool around her eyes, a choked down sob almost making it through her hardened exterior. "so maybe i let him."

you looked over to everyone else, did this sound absolutely ridiculous to them too?

"i'll just give myself up." she said, allowing the tears to flow freely and the rasp to take control of her voice. "if this is what i have to do to keep you safe, it's worth it."

you were stunned to silence. sam just wanted to give up. that wasn't the sam you knew, that wasn't the girl you fell for. you wondered where this was suddenly coming from. you thought that all the loss just got too much for her, she was willing to give herself up to end it all. you couldn't let that happen.

"no!" tara spoke up before you could. "we're not doing that, sam." the girl scrambled to stand up from her chair. "you came back to woodsboro to protect me. every single day, you make the decision to protect me. none of us would even be alive if it wasn't for you."

"she's right." chad nodded. "you have to let us help you too, sam."

"no." sam shook her head. she couldn't take it anymore. she hated how much you've all been through just because she happened to draw the short straw in a gene pool.

"yes. we're a team, remember?" tara stared her sister down, which was impressive given that tara has never been able to stare anyone down.

"actually, we're family." mindy said. you watched as the four of them came together, chad clapping and standing up. you wondered how the lovable knucklehead managed to brighten up the moment no matter what.

"core four!" core four. that was cute.

"he's gonna keep coming after us." sam said.

"isn't there somewhere safe we could just hole up in?" ethan asked. you forgot he was there for a second. maybe he felt like just as much of an outsider as you did sometimes.

"he's just gonna keep finding us." tara said to him. suddenly, it was like the gears turned in her head. "we could use that though. i have an idea."

tara held her hand out and asked for chad's phone, walking outwith the rest of the crew. sam was about to follow but you pulled her back.

"i didn't get to say what i thought." you said, your voice was firm. sam met your eyes and her lips pressed into a thin line. you were glaring at her. you shoved her chest back. it wasn't enough to topple her but it was enough to stun her. in fact, it was impressive how you were able to do it with just one hand. "how fucking dare you?!"

she stared at you with wide, shocked eyes.

"don't look at me like that. how dare you even think about giving yourself up?!" you almost screamed at her but you kept your voice down. "did you not even think of how that would affect everyone else?"

sam was rendered to silence. she wanted you to let it all out, even if it meant taking your sudden change of tone. she didn't know how to handle this side of you, but she was glad you allowed yourself to be vulnerable with her. in fact, you challenged her.

"tara would be left without anybody! you're practically chad and mindy's triplet! and me! and... and me..." you started to stutter out your words as the sobs laced themselves in between your words. "did you even remember that you made me a promise?" you asked, weakly.

"i'm sorry. i remember that promise like i made it two seconds ago." sam said, reaching for your hand and placing it over her heart. "please forgive me. i'll never bring it up again. this heart will continue to beat for you." it was criminal how easily she eased your worries.

"you stress me the fuck out." you scoffed out through tears.

"i'm afraid you will have to deal with that for a very long time then." she said, placing her own hand over yours.

"good."

𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩

you two rejoined everyone else outside, tara was already on the phone to detective bailey.

"we wanna lure him to a secure location and trap him inside." was tara's opening line that you walked in on. the girl was clever. she probably already had an entire plan mapped out in her head. you were always impressed by her level of intelligence.

"and then what?" you heard bailey over the phone.

"we execute him." you almost laughed at the aggressive word used by tara. but you felt that it was fitting.

bailey went quiet, you chalked it up to the fact that he was probably thinking the entire thing over. he had lost his daughter, you thought that he wouldn't think twice.

"are you gonna help us?" tara asked, an attitude sparking. she was growing impatient. and nobody liked impatient tara.

"let's kill this son of a bitch." bailey said.

you looked over to sam as bailey explained that you had access to the theater. he also warned you all to travel in public to minimize the chances of ghostface attacking you.

so you decided to take the subway.

𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩

the hustle and bustle of new york.

it had been a while since you've actually been out with other people. this was an unconventional reason for you and all your friends to suddenly immerse yourself in the crowd but it was better than nothing.

you almost forgot it was time to play dress up. most of the people underground were all dressed up in costumes, probably about to make their way to halloween parties.

as you pushed through the crowd. you felt yourself get pulled in a million different directions. before you knew it, you had gotten separated from your friends.

you were shoved into a tightly packed train car, trying to shove your way through to find someone familiar. you squeezed your way through the sardine-like formation that everyone situated themselves in.

eventually, though the clearing, you spotted chad. you started to slowly make your way over to them. your arm was in pain, constantly being bumped into by strangers or the train itself. you winced as someone backed into you, lightly pushing them away,

when you reached the group of four, the train shook. you stumbled into tara, reaching for her shoulder with your good arm.

"sorry." you mumbled. sam let out a breath, she was glad you made it on with them.

"it's okay. i'm glad you're here." tara said, turning to face you. you grabbed the hanging strap right above her, staying close.

"me too. where's mindy?" you asked chad. "and ethan...?"

"we got split apart. pretty boy here pulled me in. maybe if you didn't do that, i'd be with them." chad practically spat at him.

"i was just trying to keep us together." danny said, on the defensive side.

you and tara turned to him at the same time, the same expression on your faces. you squinted at him, studying him a bit. he was a local, he knew how busy the subway could get. sometimes you just had to go with the ocean and not force anything.

the lights started flickering and you made sure to keep an eye on everyone when they did turn back on. chad suddenly straightened his posture when he realised the state of the train.

"holy shit." he looked just behind sam's shoulder. you followed his eyes.

ghostface. pinhead. ghostface. michael myers. ghostface. ghostface. ghostface. ghostface. another ghostface. and another ghostface.

they were everywhere.

"fuck." you whispered under your breath.

"how many stops do we have?" tara asked, sam leaned over to look at the map.

"ten." she said.

fuck. double digits. were you even gonna make it to the first?

it was like the universe was actively working against you. there was no way you all happened to board this train on this day and get separated.

people started to funnel out of the train with each stop. you looked over at sam and realised something had caught her eye. you tried to track where she was looking but there were just too many people.

"guys." she caught the attention of everyone else.

there.

one of the ghostfaces was moving towards you at an alarming pace. just as he was about to reach sam, you stepped in front of her. she grabbed your waist to steady you and pull you back against her chest.

the person in the costume turned to exit the train. you exhaled sharply and grabbed another hanging strap, this time on sam's side. tara frowned at the loss of your closeness but admired that you stood in between sam and a potential murderer.

with sam's hand resting on your waist still, you stayed close to her side, practically leaning on the girl. your mind was racing. nine more stops to go.

you hoped that mindy was okay on the other train. she'd be just as terrified, there would be just as many ghostfaces.

stop after stop, the pit in your stomach failed to resolve itself. even if you were going to make it off the train, you still had an entire night ahead of you.

screech!

you had dozed off on about stop number six, you were now seated but still leaning on sam's shoulder. you blinked your sleep away and sat up as you hit your final stop.

the four of you exited the train, quickly jogging up the steps and out of the subway. as you walked towards the theater, you felt yourself gravitate towards sam.

fuck it.

tara, danny, and chad walked ahead of you both anyway. you reached for her hand and intertwined your fingers. you needed that moment with her before you walked into your doom. she roughly pulled her hand away, looking irritated suddenly. you looked up at her with concern, did you miss something?

as you fell asleep on stop number six, chad turned to sam.

"you have to be careful of her." he whispered. he had never been the theory type, that was more mindy's thing. but mindy wasn't there, and she had her thoughts about you. as much as she did care for you, she cared for everyone else too. "she's got just as much motivation as the rest of them."

sam looked at the floor, silently processing.

"tara broke her heart. she could be out for revenge." he continued. "i know you like her a lot. and i get it. i was like that with liv ages ago. i let my feelings cloud my judgement. and you can't do that, sam. we're counting on you."

sam gritted her teeth at what chad was saying. she knew he was right. she had to do what it took to protect her family. unfortunately, you didn't go through what they went through, and you did have motive.

"and even then, she's already taken a lot of hits. we can't have anyone slowing us down. she's down one arm and it might bite us in the ass harder than we think." chad said. she hated that he used your injury to built the case against you.

even then, it didn't stop the doubt that grew in sam's mind.

she had to make the right call tonight. and it was going to be hard.

as you met kirby outside the theater, she mentioned that she had everything set up.

"let's get you all inside." she said.

sam abruptly turned to you and danny.

"not you guys."

what?

"sam, what are you talking about?" you asked her, stepping towards her, nearly shouldering danny just to get in her eyeline.

"i can't trust anyone. and yes, i know... i know what we are. but we don't know you." you felt your heart shatter at the fact that maybe you didn't open yourself up as well as you thought. when she said that, you knew that she didn't eliminate you entirely from her list of suspects, no matter how deep her feelings ran.

"but i have to be in there with you. i promised i wouldn't leave!" you said, reaching out to her. she only stepped backwards, away from you.

"you're not woodsboro."

she was right. you weren't woodsboro. you never were and you never will be. you were never going to be a part of that little family they shared. you were never going to understand.

as you stood outside with danny, you didn't know what to do with yourself. when you saw the group round the corner, you heard danny's muffled groans. you turned around to be met with the infamous masked killer himself.

and then everything went black.

𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩

author's journal okay once again this came out a lot sooner than i expected but i had a lot of writing muse today and i promised emma that i would get this out for her! i hope you enjoy this, liefje. oooh i am sososososososo incredibly excited to write the next part of this series. cause u alllll know whats coming next. i promise it won't end when the canon ends though, i'm estimating a few more parts even after the ghostface stuff is resolved. i also fuck so hard w the music i listened to when writing this chapter. a lot of paris again but the live version of labour this time. that song just sends chills down my spine. but i promise i listened to more! particularly this song riiiiight here.

i also kinda wanna start timing myself when writing like hm just curious to see how long i usually take esp for long chapters. i hope u all have been enjoying the series so far cause i've had SUCH a good time writing it. i have an assessment due in two days so i will have to focus on that for a hot sec but i promise part 6 wont be ages cause i'll write it in my free time. anyways, i wish that everyone has the bestest day ever. kisses x

[facefullofsadness]

May i request a bbangsaz mommy kink and degredation fic? With hanni as the top minji's too nice. Maybe a sprinkling of bondage? 🗣

sorry this one took so long, it was sitting in my head for a while. hope you enjoy it anon!

content - popular meangirls!bbangsaz x student!reader (high school!au), smut (threesome, mommy kink, degradation, slight bondage, loss of virginity, cunnilingus, fingering, forced public sex, edging)

wc - 1857

a/n - had to delve deep into my writer headspace to try and think of how to write this bc nwjns girlies are my SWEET BABIES! but but I can find my own way to write it, I'm just so cool like that ;)

kim minji and pham hanni, resident popular girls of the school.

conjoined at the hip and strutting through the hallways like it's their own personal runway. these two were known to actually be really nice and generous, volunteering together around the school and yelling at bullies that would corner defenseless students.

that's what you had heard anyway. so, it came as a total shock and surprise that they were the ones cornering you, a defenseless student in an empty classroom. the three of you were assigned to be groupmates for a project, but they were too lazy to carry their end of the work load. and instead of sucking up to just finish it, they threatened you to do it!

"c'mon y/n-ie, just do it and nothing bad will happen, I promise!" hanni was always known to be a sweet talker, even as she has her hands pinning your shoulders against the wall, pressing hard enough it hurt.

her voice dripped with honey but her actions stung like the queen bee she was. minji watched quietly behind her, the taller girl's arms crossed and humming through a pleased smirk that rest on her lips.

"j-just let me go! I-I'll do the work, but just let me go..." you plead with the shorter girl who you felt so small against, your hands clutching at her blazer.

"mm, I don't know now, I'm having some fun with you. what about you minji? what do you think?" hanni's sweet voice masked with malice.

"she's too cute to let go of right now, I agree," the long dark haired girl says simply, walking up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, "we can teach her a thing or two, bet she's a virgin."

the soft evil giggles from the other girl fill the empty room, "looks it! but she seems like such a whore. I mean why is her skirt so short? just asking to be taught a lesson. and her tits are practically spilling out! it only makes sense for us to do something about this."

it wasn't your fault your assets were busty and voluptuous that the school issued uniforms didn't fit properly, but to hanni and minji, it only fueled them on to punish you for how you slutted yourself out for the whole school to see!

hanni tearing your blazer off and ripping your shirt open, the buttons flying everywhere around the classroom. you felt as her hands flew up to trail your bare sides and slip under your bra, cupping your sensitive breasts.

"no! stop!" you whine desperately under the mean girl's touch.

"play nice hanni," minji calls from behind the girl.

the former rolls her eyes and scoffs, "oh please, you were the one that said you wanted to teach her something."

the latter sighs, "yeah, but a pretty girl hasn't asked us to stop before, feels a little wrong."

you shut your eyes closed at the feeling of hanni's thumbs rolling against your nipples as the two continue to talk, "she'll start to enjoy it soon, don't worry, they always do."

"isn't that right? you're just a doll for us to play with, aren't you?" she whispers lowly into your ear.

"not when you talk to her like that geez," minji comments again, hearing her voice get closer to the opposite side hanni was on.

you feel the tall girl's lips trail the side of your neck, leaving gentle kisses against it. you resist the urge to moan out at the feeling.

"ugh, I'm too impatient," hanni states before flipping your body over and pressing your front against the wall.

you feel her hands trail up your thighs and grope your ass.

you hear a genuine gasp followed by a sinister chuckle, "are you actually just a slut y/n? why are you just wearing underwear? did you want us to fuck you?"

her fingers trail across your slit through your panties.

"and you're fucking soaked! you're into this shit, aren't you? who would've thought such a studious goody two shoes virgin like you would be dripping at being treated like a whore by two popular girls! how intriguing!"

you whimper at her words and teeth nipping at your ear, hands on your thighs, pressing her front against yours and pinning you painfully against the wall.

"hanni please..." you plead out for nothing in particular.

it felt so wrong that you wanted her to stop, but it felt so good that you couldn't tell her to.

"hm? what was that? please what y/n? use your words," her digit presses against your hole while her thumb rubs your clit agonizingly through the thin and damp material.

"I-I'm... I can't, I don't..." you ramble, not knowing to say due to your dilemma.

"hmph, listen," you feel the girl's hot breath hit your neck as her mouth trails up until she's whispering in your ear, "I'll give in to what you want, what I know you want. my pretty little doll just has to call me mommy and I'll grant all your little dirty sinful wishes."

the smile you feel on your skin sends chills down your spine. how did it escalate to this?

"I..."

"y/n-ie, do yourself a favor and listen to hanni, it won't end very well for you if you don't, unfortunately," minji interrupts your thoughts.

"see? you know me so well!" the mentioned girl says, hearing her smile in her voice.

"I'm just looking out for the poor girl," she states with a pout.

"oh boohoo minji, she's literally fine. if anything, she's enjoying it! look at how wet she is," you feel the material of your underwear be pushed to the side before hanni's fingers slide through your entire slit, gathering your slick.

you bite your lip and muffle a moan at the contact. the short girl shoves her fingers towards the tall girl's face, showing her the sticky pleasure that dripped from your cunt.

"go on then, taste it, I know you've been dying for this too," hanni waves her fingers in front of minji's face.

the latter grumbles but proceeds to grip the latter's wrist, "I hate you by the way," she mutters before licking her fingers, slowly dragging her tongue along each digit, savoring your taste.

you rest your forehead against the wall and close your eyes, trying really hard not to look at the erotic scene occurring next to you. you feel a hand in your hair and it pulls your head backwards until you're facing the ceiling, neck exposed. your eyes shoot open at the action of teeth sharply sinking into your shoulder before retreating just as swift as they sank.

"hanni!" you shriek.

"please just listen..." you hear minji's desperate plea next to you, her hot breath hitting your sensitive neck.

"don't tease anymore, please..." you finally whisper.

"well, you know what to do then," the girl who bit you licks at the red marks that remain.

"m-mommy, please just... just fuck me..." you feel a tear run down your cheek, feeling embarrassed and vulnerable.

an amused giggle leaves hanni's mouth, a sweet but devilish sound, "that's a good little slut."

you're manhandled towards a desk nearby, hanni roughly bending you over it and flipping your skirt up. you wince a bit at the pain from hitting the desk, but it's quickly replaced by the feeling of your wrists being grabbed and held behind your back. you feel material bind your hands together (hanni's tie) quite tightly.

"don't panic, I'll give you exactly what you want," the girl behind you reassures (though you're not comforted).

minji comes into view in front of you, her hand under your chin holding it up to look at her.

"hi pretty. I wanna have my fun with you too, I don't think hanni should get all of you to herself," the girl caressing your cheek smiles.

she stands, hand cupping your cheek still. her other hand goes to lift her skirt up, exposing her dampened underwear. at that moment, you feel your own panties get pushed aside and fingers slide up and down your entrance.

"I'm gonna fuck your pussy while minji fucks your face! sound good?" you have no time to respond as you feel two fingers slip into your cunt.

your mouth opens to moan but is muffled by the girl in front of you shoving her clit into your face, her sigh filling your ears.

"use your tongue princess, come on," minji breathes out.

you obey, digging your face into the dark haired girl's core, tongue flicking over her clit and darting into her hole. you whimper against her as hanni's digits quicken their pace in you, her fingers curling to hit that delicious spot inside.

"ha, look at this slut! she's fucking moving by herself!" the girl behind you says amused.

you hadn't realized but she was right, your hips moved back against hanni's hand desperately, chasing your ever growing pleasure building in your stomach.

"ignore it angel, just keep going like that, it feels so good," the girl in your mouth sighs, her hand moving from your cheek to lace through your messy hair, massaging your scalp.

the whiplash between the two girls' attitudes towards you was dizzying. hanni felt like fire while minji felt like ice, one was vicious with her words while one was caring and careful with them. they must've stayed together for so long due to the opposites attract ideology.

your eyes squeezed shut at the slap that stung on your ass, the thrusting of hanni's fingers speeding up every second. you moan against minji's soaked pussy as another digit enters your clenching cunt.

"g-good girl, so good, feels s-so fucking good," minji mumbles above you, the grip in your hair tightening and pushing your face further into her.

"take it whore, take all of it," hanni behind you chants, feeling her place kisses on your ass.

"I'm so close," the tall girl gasps.

"hurry up, I want my turn," the short girl presses her thumb to your clit roughly.

"be- fuckkk... be patient, you've b-been playing with y/n this w-whole time," minji struggles through her sentence.

"so you can eat her out next geez, I'm looking out for you, you know!" hanni smirks before you feel her tongue drag against your entrance all the way back.

the vibration from your scream into minji's pussy has her clutching your scalp and stilling her hips, her moans fill the room and you feel her cum rush into your mouth. you drink all of it and give her kitten licks to guide her through her orgasm. her thighs tremble against you as your own legs shake from hanni's onslaught and abuse of your cunt. but it all suddenly stops when she pulls out her hand and slaps it against your clit a few times before pulling away completely.

you whine out a loud "no" in desperation, minji's hand combing through your hair to try and calm you down.

"don't you worry your pretty little lust filled brain dolly, we're just starting!"

all for a goddamn group project.

[have-you-seen-my-sanity]

I'd like to request reader after a succesful final exam get rewarded by Steven and Marc. They would whisper things like i'm so proud of you or that's my smart girl, but she gets so dumb on my cock

Thank you!

Hi anony!^^

One word: SMUT!!

Some quality time

Steven Grant & Marc Spector x fem!reader

Warnings: smut, nsfw, oral (fem! receiving), fingering, p in v, soft dom Steven, the boys are utterly horny in some parts, cliffhanger ending(?).

I think I made Marc a pantie sniffer for 1 second, oops(not sorry, hehe)

Summary: You've successfully accomplished your final exam as the best one and your boys wanted to reward you.

Out of all graduates you of course were the best one. To be honest you were scared of the final exam, and if it wasn't for Marc and Steven helping you, you'd probably had worse results. After everything was done, including the small party at the end, you already saw him standing outside waiting for you.

On your way out, you waved goodbye to some of your friends going the opposite direction from you before you approached him.

"Hi Steven, hi Marc."

This time it was Marc, he smiled warmly as you got closer

"Hey sexy. You look beautiful in that dress." he gestured towards the dress you were wearing.

"You already told me at our breakfast today." you couldn't help but blush slightly.

"And I'd do it again and again." Marc held out his arm for you in a gentle manner for you to hook yours on.

Both of you started to make your way back home in silence for some time.

"So, how did it go? Did our teaching help you out?"

"Actually I was the best out of all. So yes, your teaching did help alot."

"Oh? Really? That sure screams for a little reward, don't you think?"

You nudged him with your elbow "You don't have to do anything."

Marc laughed. "Honey, we want to. By the way, Steven wants out. He's going nuts."

Before you could even blink Steven took over the body.

"Love, you look absolutely stunning in that dress!"

You could hear the genuine admiration in Steven's voice.

"You two seem a little happy today."

"Of course we are! You finally made it! And you were the best."

"Come on, it was just an exam! Okay and a little party after, but still, only an exam!"

Steven gave you a playful glare, nudging your shoulder. "You forgot something, love. It was a final exam. Final. Means you're done now."

You just grumbled in response, trying to not laugh.

"Even Marc said that." Steven said, reaching out with his other hand to flick your nose with his finger.

After a while you broke the silence, curious of what the 'reward' might be.

"Marc said something about a reward? I'm sure you must be involved, right?"

"Yeah. A reward for our smart girl." Steven's voice lowered teasingly, hinting at what they had in mind.

Soon enough you arrived back home. While Steven minded his own business you went to get changed. You were only in your underwear, hanging your dress on the coat hanger with your back turned towards the door, not noticing the boys sneaking up on you as out of nowhere two arms snaked around your waist, causing you to jump slightly as he rested his chin on top of your head.

"Gotcha." He said softly, it was Marc again he pulled you against him, hugging you from behind.

"Next time make some noise so I'll know you're sneaking up on me, Spector."

"Maybe. Or I'll get Steven out." he teased, knowing Steven would talk back.

*Oi, not cool mate.* Steven replied in their headspace.

Marc laughed softly, it was the laugh that told you Steven was talking back to him.

"Guess Steven will let you out next time when there's some fight going on." You couldn't help but take part in this and tease Marc, who in return poked your side.

"Whoa, boys what's the reward?"

"Some nice, long quality time with your boys."

Marc guided you to the bed, gently laying you onto your back.

*Marc, please tell me I'm not the only one thinking she looks breathtaking in her underwear everytime?*

Marc looked at you with a smirk before answering Steven.

"Absolutely right, buddy." He was already starting to take off your panties.

"Was it Steven? What did he say?"

"He was just spilling facts that you're so, so breathtaking in your underwear."

After that, Marc brought your panties to his nose and inhaled, closing his eyes for a second.

"Not only does our girl look stunning, but smells perfect too."

*Oh hell yeah she does* Steven's voice inside their headspace was already needy.

Meanwhile your cheeks were already flushing, catching Marc's attention.

"You see that Steven? She's lighting up like fire."

Marc leaned down, spreading your legs and closed in on your inner thigh, sticking his tongue out, slowly and teasingly licking his way upwards, causing you to whimper softly and already moving your hands towards his head.

When Marc's mouth finally arrived at your core, he teased your entrance, moving his tongue around your hole, spooning up the pooling wetness already there.

"Oh fuck!" Your hips arched upwards, desperate for more.

*God...I could listen to her angelic noises all day...* At this point Marc was certain Steven was already foaming at his mouth.

"Honey, you're making Steven lose his shit inside the headspace. Oho, when he's going to have you, you're gonna get it." Marc said lowly and seductively, looking up at you.

He gave your clit a flick with his tongue, catching you off guard before he thrusted his tongue inside you. This caused your eyes to roll back in pleasure.

*Marc, tell her if I could, I would eat her delicious cunt out the whole night.*

"Oh baby, if you could hear what you're doing to Steven right now, he's a mess already and I haven't even started yet." Marc smirked against you.

You whimpered. "W-what did he say?"

"He'd eat out your pussy all night long. Wouldn't matter if you'd be asleep or not." He thrusted his tongue inside you once more, swirling it around, making you tug at Marc's hair.

Marc stopped his magic without a warning, getting up and stepping between your legs before pulling his already rock hard cock out.

"But I can't blame Steven. With a pussy as delicious as yours, it's hard to resist."

He positioned his dick at your entrance, collecting your wetness with his tip before pushing inside.

"Fuck- I have to say- no matter how much we fuck you, you always manage to have a- f- death grip around us-"

Marc already sounded like he was losing it but he kept his pace steady.

*Mate, our girl looks marvelous every time.*

Steven's words made Marc smile and lean down to you.

"You're right Steven. Our beautiful, smart girl."

*Yeah until she gets cockdrunk for us*

The sounds escaping from you always managed to make the boys go feral.

"We are so proud of you, babygirl. So proud."

You heard him, but you were not sure if you could respond logically

"You two h-help-ed me..."

If you weren't cockdrunk before, you were definitely now.

*I think she's saying we should get rewarded instead, Marc.* Steven chimed in.

"Ohh, she wants to reward us now, huh?" Marc teased, angling his hips to hit the spot deep inside your core making you let out higher pitch moans.

*Fuck, that hit a spot there, mate.*

"Hit a spot there, didn't I?"

Both said almost in unison although you couldn't hear Steven. Thinking wasn't your speciality now anyway.

"We're so happy for you. We knew you'd be smart."

Marc repeated the same thrust he did earlier to make your mind spinning, drawing another high pitch moans out of you.

"Yes- you're our clever girl. But when it comes to our cock..." He trailed off, leaving you to try and think. "You're so dumb when we have our way with you, hm? Feels so good you're going dumb, right honey?"

All you could do was moan in response.

*Marc, keep teasing her...please..* Steven's voice was almost pleading with Marc to urge an answer out of you.

"Too dumb to speak, hmm?"

He decided it was time to increase his speed, pounding into you full force.

"Y-yess.." Was all you could moan out while Marc made a mess of you.

*Bloody hell, she's so beautiful all fucked out*

"I-I'm close, boys!" You warned, gripping the sheets.

Marc, already panting leaned down to you

"After I'm done with you, Steven's gonna have his fun with you. So better not get too comfy."

Right after he said that, you walls gripped his dick like a vice, gushing your juices all over it.

Marc moaned. "Fuck- you're killing me here."

He came too, pumping his hot load into you, supporting himself on his hands on either side of your head.

You on the other hand couldn't help but ask why they're so riled up today

"Boys, why are you so in the mood today? What happened to you two on the last mission?"

Marc was still catching his breath and pulled out of you

"Well, we said we're gonna reward you. You should know by now we take this very, very serious."

"Yeah but I feel like poor Steven is possessed by something. Oh and you too, Marc."

*Yeah we got possessed by her.* Steven said in their headspace.

"There you have it, Steven just said we're possessed by you." He chuckled.

Marc pushed himself up "I'll be right back." he made his way to the bathroom watching you calm down and giving you a seductive side eye you didn't notice.

You only got a few minutes of break before you heard him come back. This time it was Steven.

"Love!"

You snapped your head up "Right, I forgot about the package deal you two come with." you chuckled.

Steven sat down on the edge of the bed "Yeah. And don't worry about resting, it's not like you have to go somewhere tomorrow, so y' have the whole day to sleep after this."

*Steven, tell her we would gladly keep going until she's snuffed out like a candle tomorrow.* Marc said in their headspace.

"Marc said we could keep going all day, to make sure you remember this day."

"All this because of an exam?" You giggled.

Steven leaned down close do you

"Ah-ah, what did I say earlier? Final. Exam. You don't have to study anymore."

"Final." You mimiced him.

*Let's go buddy, show her.*

"Cheeky lil' thing, eh? Alright, back to business."

Steven grinned, getting up to step between your legs.

"Think you can go another round, love?"

"Maybe."

"Yeah? Wanna go dumb on our cock again?"

*Now I know how you felt earlier, Steven.*

"Seems like," Steven moved his hand towards your previously well fucked hole "now Marc is the one goin' crazy." he began rubbing your clit to get you needy again.

"But he already had his, uh, 'round'."

"Never doubt us, love. You know how we can get." Steven teased.

"Stevenn.." you moaned.

*Fuck, listen to her sweet noises...*

Steven couldn't help but laugh. "If you could hear Marc rightnow, you'd think he's mentally jerking off."

You half laughed half moaned at this "Wait you two can do that?"

*No I'm not.*

Steven chuckled "He just said he isn't." he moved his hand further down to thrust two fingers inside you.

You moaned, feeling yourself coating his fingers in your juices.

*She's still tight as hell, right buddy?*

"Oh yeah, like she wants to stay that tight."

"Oh my god, boys."

Steven curled his fingers inside you, making your hips arch up.

*Look at our good girl.*

"Mhh-mm, taking us so well."

Steven kept thrusting his fingers, loving how responsive you were.

"Y'see how lucky we are with you, love?"

"Y-es..." you moaned.

The way you were responding to them was almost too much for Steven.

"Fuck, I don't think I can hold back any longer."

Steven straightened up, grabbing his already hardened again dick and positioned himself at your hole, teasing you with the tip then pushed inside swiftly.

"Stevy!" You mewled.

*Oh shit. Do that again, Steven.*

"Yeah? Like how we take care of this cunt?"

Steven pulled out until only his tip remained inside and then pushed his whole girth right back into you.

"S-Steven!"

*Yeah that's it, there she is.*

"Bloody hell, love, you're turning Marc into a maniac back there." Steven chuckled.

"He already is." You spoke without thinking.

*Really? Tell her I hope she knows there is still some time left before the day ends.*

"Oh oh, you're in trouble now, sweetheart." Steven teased, speeding up his movements.

"W-what? Wait what?" You moaned, pushing your hips to meet his movements.

"Marc said there is still some time left before the day ends." He slammed into you.

You began to realize what you said, but you couldn't concentrate about it because of how good Steven is slamming into you.

Steven leaned close to you. "Gettin' stupid again, yeah?"

You could only nod.

"Our clever girl. So smart. But when she gets our cock, she's a stupid mess."

You could feel yourself getting close again, the speed in which Steven is pounding into you made your head spin.

"Stevy, I'm getting close!"

"Yeah, can feel it." Steven breathed, feeling himself get close too.

It wasn't long before you gushed over him, coating his dick in your juices once again as Steven did the same to your insides, painting them white.

Steven collapsed ontop of you, burying his face into your neck.

After a moment of content silence you spoke

"You two are insane." You giggled.

Steven raised his head, rolling off of you and to his side, smiling. "You're welcome, darling."

"Now comes the resting, yes?"

"Yeah we uh, should be done..."

You raised your eyebrow "Should?"

Steven gave a dirty smirk. "Y'know, you called Marc a maniac, me insane and both of us insane aswell. Makes two for each of us."

Your jaw dropped. "No way, you can't be serious." you laughed.

Steven flicked your nose with his finger. "Besides, we already told you you'll take tomorrow to rest."

You just laughed, nudging his shoulder, not believing him, not even noticing the switch.

"Oh so now you're laughing, huh?" Marc was back.

You immediately stopped laughing.

Marc narrowed his eyes, a faint smirk was on his face, he looked like he was about to pounce on you.

At this point you were already certain you'll put tomorrow to good use in terms of resting.

[sevs-corner]

Tf 141: Mafia AU- but the boys see you slowly opening up to them

A/N: i just feel too soft for these boiyos (is this self-indulgent? yeah) Masterlist here! Song Inspo here!

Johnny was one of the first that you truly opened up and relied on during your first couple of weeks working at the bakery

You could recall like it was yesterday

It was during a particularly rough night for everyone

Your shift was shit for the amount of times you were fumbling and being so out of your element just because of a failed presentation during one of your online classes yesterday

You worked so hard and spared so much time on it-- just for it to get roasted and toasted by the panel of biased professors who only believed in "abstract" art

So working with that over your head wasn't fun

Neither was Johnny on his end

Their job turned out to be a bust and even lost one of their more loyal men to some ambush their informant set up for them

To put it simply, everyone was a mess

Words of comfort were reached in neither sides, nor did any of you try to

You all just couldn't

Not right now at least

Even as you and Johnny sit at the sidewalk in front of the bakery

Sharing a smoke and a small drink in between you two

Something to drown in for the moment, to decompress you suppose

You had a couple of inches in between you two, keeping a respectable distance from each other's personal space

Soap, even when was cooped up in his headspace, was hyper aware of how he shouldn't cross the line by touching your fingers as you passed the cig or when grabbing the glass

Somehow, you two always reached for the same thing at the same time

Which made you breath out a sigh before just inching closer to him, making him look at out in curiousness

Once your shoulders were touching, you placed the cup on your thigh, hand wrapped around it so it wouldn't spill

And ever so...gently, your head lands on his as you offer the almost finished cig to him

This time, its easier to reach for it, easier to accept it

After a puff, he leans into your head as well, your temples touching and pounding against each other

But you both don't mind

Not even when he wrapped his hand on the other side of the glass

Not even when he laid an arm around you to pull you closer to him

Not even when he smelled your hair, taking in a deep breath of it and exhaling it out shakily

Not even when he pulled you close for a hug you both seemed to need more than a cancer stick and some poisoned drink

Gaz starts noticing you more, and he doesn't even know when or how it happened-- but it just did

Everyday, every time you get his breakfast from the kitchen yawning all the while with a head of hair that just might be worst than a nest (as Soap likes to call it)

He notices how you blink more often when the sleep is still scattered across your face

He notices how you yawn so softly and stretch quite similarly to the white cat you take care of

He notices how your smile, the many variations of it, is particularly designed to whoever you talk to

And he thinks the one you give him is the most adorable one

Cheeks slightly puffed up with small :3 made him want to pinch em

You notice this one day as you see him do some sort of grabby hands behind you and you could only assume the best from this man

He has treated you so so well compared to all the other people you've met so far in your life

Always made sure you were comfy and just treated you like a person, valuing your opinion and putting your safety first over everything

Always looking out for you and making sure your fridge is well stocked on days you got sick or even just regular days when it gets a little rough-- he was always there

So you thought, why not let him pinch your cheeks a little?

Turning around, you bend to his eye level and gave him your grin, offering your cheeks to him

He gasps in realization, hands already raised to do it

Yet... he hesitates, asking if you were fine with it

You laugh, saying that just because he asked he's have full reign for five minutes

His eyes were already shining, you were giving him that much power? Oh you'll regret it

He then goes off to coo at you and squish at them mercilessly-- even making you do funny fish faces that made you- try to- swat him away for a couple of times

Afterwards, with your cheeks all rosy, he tries his best to soothe them and gives you an apologetic smile-- promising he'd make it up to you

But you deny, telling him that was you repaying him and he could do it anytime he wanted from now on

This time he doesn't hesitate and does it again, despite your efforts of you running away from him

Simon and you didn't quite get along, so much so that your petty arguments with him would be worse than yours with Johnny's

So its quite a wonder when you find yourself crying at his doorstep, rain pouring so harshly behind you that he knew that he had no choice but to house you for a while

Simon was never good with handling emotions nor was it easy for him to handle it himself, so he could only ask for your forgiveness in his head as he tries his best to clean you up and comfort you in a way he knew best

Some coffee and pastries.

Once you got out of the shower all warmed up and dried with a fresh set of clothes he gave you (and his poor dear heart was about to explode from seeing you in his clothes), you went up to him and thanked him

For a lot of things, but before you could get another word in- he shoves a cookie in your mouth-- commanding you to chew and sit at the table, where a tray of pastries ranging from sweet to savory that was accompanied mug of coffee

Your eyes soften at how much he's giving and you relent, sitting down with him and deciding that maybe its alright to stay at his place for now while you wait out the rain

He doesn't question why you came to him out of all the others

He doesn't question why you cried

He doesn't question why you gripped him in a hug so hard it reminded him of child him

He doesn't question why you were trembling all the way to the bathroom, scared to even touch the water

So he tried to help you, show you that's it okay

And he grounded you, and he expects nothing in return

Not minding if you went back to your usual self of keeping up the banter between you

So he doesn't expect to hear you talk, to share your story

To explain why you find yourself here at this moment

And he lets you, and he thinks that maybe he minds more than he thinks, cares more than he lets on, and thinks he should question you a bit more

for once, you're thankful he brushes aside your apologies (however sarcastic it may be) and lets you be

And maybe from the way he had shared some of the things he liked with you, you were more inclined to owe him something-- even if he cared less for it

For once, you're glad Simon didn't mind you and your presence in his space-- its calm and cool, just like him

Somehow, you find it more comforting than the space you're currently living in (even if it had the same vibe) and sharing this sentiment with Simon makes him chuckle

So when he offered him place whenever it gets too cold in yours, you told him he had no 'take back-sies' and you were gonna abuse that right now

This makes him rolls his eyes, not surprised at how you're back to your usual gremlin self

And... he definitely prefers this sight than the one by his doorstep just a few moments ago

Price always tried to observe you and your little mannerisms, taking note of your routine, and pointing it whenever it you stray off from it

Making you quite surprised at how much attention he's giving you and he chuckles, reminding you that he's always there to help you

He cares so openly that its hard not to love the guy extra special

Whether that came into putting more efforts to his food prep or making sure he got all of his nutrients in his meals

you were sure to give best effort when it came to him

But he made it hard for you to do that

Not when he does anything in his power to make it easier, making so easy to like and pleasant to talk with

But only when he finds himself downtrodden in front of you does he actually see how much you've grown on him (and vice versa)

It was a lone night in the bakery, and he was downing drink after drink

Just to get his mind off some nightmare that haunted him during a nap he took in his office

He told the boys he wouldn't be long, promising to follow them after a couple more drinks

But... he couldn't

Not when he was so inebriated that somehow, when he woke up, he finds himself in your bed-- and you lying on a makeshift one at the couch

The guilt grows when he sees himself in clean clothes, body feeling more clean than ever, and a wet towel and basin right besides him

you took care of him

you let him into your home

He sighs, kicking himself mentally for drinking too much, but for also forcing you to take care of him

He also wants to talk about you bringing men into your apartment again but... when he sees that peaceful sleeping face despite the uncomfortable place you were positioned in, he decides to put that on the back of his mind

He wants to pay back your efforts into taking care of him so he carefully trudges about your mini kitchen, making you your favorite food and setting it onto the coffee table before waking you up (and bless John's heart for wanting to see this moment everyday for the rest of his life)

He feels lucky that you trust him enough, and you feel lucky for trusting a man that would also take care of you in return

So you then share the breakfast, indulging in light-hearted chats that made him even feel better than a night out drinking away his sorrows

You find yourself happy to help this man take off a couple of weight off his shoulders now and again, especially with how devastated he looked last night

So you try-- for him, try reaching out of your shell for him in return for all the kindness he's shown you (and he's very much appreciative of this)

A/N: Nothin much but a lil blurb i can't wait for winter to come :<<

Taglist!: @accidental-obsessionist @sunshineistoofuckingbright @sleepisfortheweakpooh

[onlyjaeyun]

𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐋𝐘 𝐁𝐔𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒 – 𝟓𝟎

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐈𝐅𝐓𝐘: 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞

↬ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐉𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐱 𝐅𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐞 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

↬ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬!𝐀𝐔, 𝐂𝐄𝐎!𝐉𝐚𝐲, 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐲!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

↬ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 𝟒.𝟏𝐤 (not proofread im sorry)

"Please, pick up", Jongseong begs quietly as he tightens his grip on the steering wheel of his car, "please, Baby. Please, pick up the phone."

In his twentyeight years of life he's never been as anxious, nervous and stressed as he is in this particular moment and as Jay tries his best to follow all the traffic rules, a wave of flashbacks from your last panick attack at your own apartment hit him, yet this time it seems to be even worse.

He knows you're safe.

His men are with you and from Donyeom's last call only two minutes ago, he knows there are actually enough of them to take down a whole football team, let alone your two brothers. Yet the feeling of nausea seems to become permanent the longer the drive to your apartment takes and the scenarios in his head start drifting into the worst directions possible.

By the time the young CEO finally parks his car right in front of your aprtment building, his eyes nervously roam his surroundings, desperately searching for the rental car his security guard had mentioned about twenty minutes ago, only to realise that his is the only one in eyesight.

With his heart brutally slamming against his rib cage, Jay walks up to your boys, the faces now familiar like he's known them all his life and as he approaches the grouo of young males, they don't hesitate to reassure him of your safety.

"She's safe, Jay", Seyeon says quickly, his thick eyebrows furrowed as he looks the business man up and doen to make sure of his physical well-being.

"I – Where are they, Yeonie? What the fuck happened? And why didn't you guys tell me about this?"

Jay knows he's wrongfully accusing the boys, yet in this particular moment he's not ready to admit the fact that this is his mistake and his only.

He should have made a proper background check on the two men he hired. He should have taken even better precautions. He should have been more careful.

"Calm down", the young boy says calmly and doesn't stray away from Jongseong's strict gaze.

"They left as soon as more of your men arrived ten minutes ago. And we didn't tell you because we didn't know. You should have told us about this!"

Jay's eyes scan every single one of Seyeon's expressions, the accusation hitting him at full force and if it wasn't for the intense anxiety mixing with adrenaline in his veins, he would have been a little more rational and less emotional, yet the louder the young boy's words become in his head, the harder it becomes to fight back the tears of guilt.

"I'm sorry", Jongseong whispers softly, his voice breaking at the end of his apology as a thin veil of tears blurs his vision.

Seyeon's cold expression immediately softens at the sight of the usually so strong and rather distant CEO in such a vulnerable state and without giving it another thought, he pulls Jay into a tight hug.

"She's safe. That's what matters. We'll talk about this when you're in a better headspace. Go and see your girl now, big boss."

Jay almost instinctively buries his face in the neck of the teenager, not realising just how shaken up he is before he pulls away, nods and wordlessly passes the rest of the boys to enter your apartment complex.

Just like the last time, Jong doesn't waste time waiting for the elevator to areive and opts to sprinting the stairs all the way to the fifth floor and when usually he'd do something so physically challenging would never faze him, he can barely catch his breath the moment he finally comes to stand in front of your apartment with about ten of his men all lined up in the hallway, waiting for him.

"Has she finally opened the door, Dokyeom?" Jay's eyes anxiously scan the face of the security guard, only for him to shake his head before verbally responding to his question.

"Fuck", this time Jong simply can't hold himself from getting louder, the anxiety and stress driving him into absolute insanity.

"What the fuck is she doing? Is she even in there? What if they somehow got in there and are holding her hostage? Why haven't you guys kicked in her fucking door yet? What the fuck is this shit?"

None of the man dare to speak up as their young boss loses himself in the panic of your absence and their silence just seems to drive him even crazier.

"Answer my fucking questions, Dokyeom! Why the fuck aren't you guys saying anything?"

Jay's voice is loud, louder than any of the men have ever heard him and in no other situation would he raise his volume like this, yet the mere thought of you being in danger has easily turned him into the worst version of himself he's ever experienced.

"Did something happen to her? Did something happen to the love of my life? Somebody just fucking say something – anything", without even realising, Jongseong reaches for Dokyeom's collar, his grip tight enough to turn his knuckles white as he looks at the young man with teary eyes, "please, don't tell me something happened to her."

And just as said security guard opens his mouth to say something, Jong finally notices the movement in the corner of his eye and with his heart brutally slamming against his rib cage, he turns his head to get a proper view, only to be met with the sight of you, the love of his life.

For a whole minute, the world as well as his heart come to a stop just to spin and beat even faster the next second, leaving the business man lightheaded as relief takes over his whole body.

You carefully watch the way Jongseong's facial expressions soften as his brain processes your presence and at the way his usually so soft and gentle eyes are filled with pain and panic you can't stop the tears from streaming down your cheeks.

The past two hours passed by in a blur. After spending a good hour just crying about your little argument, you didn't even bother taking a shower and just went straight to your apartment, craving a nice hot bath to calm yourself down and give your brain at least an hour to shut everything else out and focus on the warm water and silence.

You didn't know what to expect from your boyfriend, yet it definitely wasn't fifteen missed calls, especially after stepping out of the shower to the sound of way too many male voices on the other side of your door.

As the panic overwhelmed your body, you didn't even bother changing into your pyjamas and simply having a quick look through your peephole to ease your messy thoughts. To your luck the sight of about ten men in suits, Dokyeom and Mingyu included, it didn't take much time for you to calm down again.

You didn't even get to call your worried boyfriend back as his loud voice made its way through your thin walls and as if the universe had just waited for him to say those four words, you opened the door and stepped into the hallway just to hear him call you the love of his life.

A wave of guilt washes over your body as you take in the sight of your boyfriend in his actual pyjamas, hair messily falling into his bare face and his shaky hands as he pulls away from the security guard with his pretty eyes widened in nothing but relief.

"My Angel", is the first thing to leave Jongseong's lips before he approaches you and quickly pulls you into his arms, his mind too messy as it tries to make him believe that you're not actually there, only for all those thoughts to leave his head as soon as you wrap your arms around his neck and your sweet scent embraces him in the most perfect way possible.

"I'm so sorry, Jongie", you whisper into his ear, your soft cries breaking his heart but Jay doesn't dare use his voice just yet, so all he does is shake his head in response.

"I'm okay, I promise", your words, your voice, your touch easily calms his heart down enough and with a soft sigh Jay allows you to pull away just enougj to meet your gaze, "everything is okay. I'm here. I'm safe."

It's then that Jongseong realises that his body went into an anxiety attack, something he hasn't had in so long it actually overwhelmed him to the point where he didn't recognize his own reactions. While last time you were the one to follow the pattern of his breathing, it's him doing it with yours now, inhaling and exhaling deeply for who knows how long.

"There you go, you're doing so good for me, my love", you whisper softly, holding his face so gently, it feels like you're afraid to break him into pieces if you made a wrong move.

You're quick to pull him back into a hug once his breathing is back to normal and as Jay deeply inhales your scent, he finally finds his way back to reality.

You're here. In his arms. Safe and sound.

"You need to come home with me, Baby", Jay whispers into your ear, not rrady to let go of you just yet, "we can sleep in separate rooms if you want to. Fuck, I'll even stay at Hoon's if that's what you need me to do but please, I need you to come home with me, angel girl. It's too dangerous, you're not safe here."

His words definitely take you aback but as soon as you saw those missed calls on your phone display, you knew something had happened because Jongseong would have never panicked this much for nothing.

"Of course, Jongie", you reply calmly and take his face into your hands again, gently caressing his cheeks and quickly wiping away the single tear drop which had managed to escape. 

"I'm going to explain everything to you in the car. Go ahead and get changed, we'll go when you're ready."

All you can do is nod with big, teary eyes, still not quite over your boyfriend's intense reaction and although you're not necessarily scared or anxious, there's still this weird feeling of panic crawling underneath your skin, leading you to be as fast as physically possible. 

You don't even bother taking anything but your phone and your keys as you step out of your bedroom dressed in random sweats you found on the floor and the oversized hoodie you had on when you had arrived to your apartment about three hours ago. You give Jongseong a nod of approval and instinctively reach for his hand, only for him to pull you even closer to his body, yet remaining just as quiet as you. 

The car drive to your boyfriend's penthouse is filled with silence until Sunghoon's name pops up on Jong's phone and the young business man makes sure to give his best friend an update on the whole situation after only texting him a single text message and then not picking up any of his calls. 

You can hear the other boys' voices in the back as they all let out exclaims of relief upon receiving the news of your wellbeing and it doesn't take Jongseong longer than a few minutes to end the call. 

You're glad he agreed to let Dokyeom drive, as he realized that sitting behind the wheel in such an emotional state might not be the best idea. 

Jongseong reaches for your face, his knuckles softly graze your cheek before he places two of his fingers underneath your chin and tilts your head up. You don't even wait for his next move as you push your lips against his and indulge in the sweet feeling of his kiss. 

The kiss is soft. It's gentle and so full of love, you feel it fill your chest with warmth in a way only Park Jongseong has ever been able to, a feeling of comfort and security quickly following. 

It doesn't take much for you to lose yourself in the sweetness of him and the second Jay pushes your chin down just enough to push his tongue into your mouth, a soft whimper bubbles up your throat and loudly echoes through the silence in the car. 

Jay doesn't want to pull away. He just got a taste of his favorite drug after what feels like ages, yet he'd never risk letting his men hear what's meant for his ears and his only. 

To his luck, you're only about five more minutes left until you two are back in the safety of his penthouse and for the first time in the past few hours, Jongseong finally doesn't struggle to take a breath. 

With a soft sigh he gives you one last kiss on the lips but doesn't move a single inch, knowing you both need the close proximity now more than ever.

That's probably exactly why neither one of you bothers to walk further than the couch as soon as you step through the door and into the warmth of your shared home.

While he was still a little hesitant in the car because of his men, Jay doesn't seem to have an ounce of patience left in his body as he pulls you onto his lap the second he plops down on the couch next to you. 

You don't know how much time passes until Jay starts to speak, you're too mesmerized by the sight of his soft yet somehow sharp features, his pretty eyes and plump lips. You've missed looking at him like this, with no time pressure or the fear of someone seeing the two of you like this. 

It's finally just the two of you and nothing else matters. 

"There's no need to panic or be worried, okay, Baby? Everything's taken care of now but some things didn't go according to plan", Jong begins and pushes a strand of your hair behind your ear, his tired eyes never once leaving yours and you can't even get yourself to verbally respond, so all you to is nod. 

"It's about my brothers, isn't it?" You finally find your voice after a beat of silence and this time it's your boyfriend who just simply moves his head to answer your question. 

"Apparently the men I hired to take care of them are working for someone else, which is why and how they found your addressed and basically camped in front of your apartment building, waiting for you to come back."

You attentively listen to your boyfriend's words and despite a wave of horror washing over you, you find yourself more focused on the way he suddenly avoids your gaze, something you're not quite used to from him. It takes you a few seconds but as soon as you notice the way he nervously starts chewing on the inside of his cheek, you can finally put a name on the emotion written all over his face. 

Shame. 

"Why are you ashamed, Jongie?", you don't even think about the part with your brothers, too consumed by Park Jongseong, just as usual. 

"Because I put you in danger", he whispers, not an ounce of his usual confidence and certainty to be seen, "I didn't do roper background checks on those two men and that's why those fuckers felt so comfortable waiting for you."

Saying these words out loud are supposed to feel relieving, but all it does is make Jay's conscience cry out even louder as guilt, shame and embarrassment take over every inch of his body. 

"Jongie, you–", "Don't try to find excuses for this, Baby. I promised to always keep you safe and protected, yet the danger was right there, right in front of our eyes and I failed to see it. I failed to keep my promise because of a mistake so stupid, a mistake that should have been avoided at all costs. I'm sorry."

Maybe it's the fact that you haven't been this close to him in what feels like an eternity or maybe it's about you two getting into your first argument and maybe, just maybe it's because you've never loved a person the way you love Park Jongseong, but regardless of the reasoning, you can't help but feel tears pricking at the corners of your eyes at his words. 

There's just something about him that gets to you in a way you can't even explain. It's like that tiny shaking in his voice just slices a knife through your heart, yet the comfort it comes with heals you just as fast. 

"Jongie, look at me, please", you say softly and are now the one to take his face into your hands, your lips stretching into a soft smile as soon as his gaze meets yours.

"You're human, Jay. Things like these happen and that's okay. There's no point in beating yourself up over this, because it was exactly that: a mistake. Mistakes are done unintentionally", you never once avert your eyes from his and feel yourself falling in love with him all over again, "besides, you never broke your promise. Dokyeom was with me the whole time. I was never in actual danger. Please, don't be so hard on yourself, it breaks my heart to see you like this."

"No, please", Jong suddenly gulps harshly and shakes his head, "no more tears. No more pain. My heart can't bear it anymore."

You're slightly taken aback by his response and it's then that you realize that a few of your tears had managed to make their way down your cheeks and with a soft sigh you pull him into yet another kiss. 

To some it might seem odd that you're the one comforting him when you just found out that your brothers have been stalking you and aren't as far away from you as you had initially believed, yet for some reason you're not as concerned about them and their silly little plans to taunt and terrorize you as you are about your boyfriend's mental and emotional state. 

They're going to do whatever they need to feed their fragile ego either way, which is why you're not as scared about their actions as you were just a few weeks ago. Oh, and also the fact you're now accompanied by a six feet tall former military man most of the time now. 

"It's okay, my love", you sigh and wrap your arms around his shoulders, loving the way Jay doesn't hesitate to bury his face in the crook of your neck. 

His brain struggles a little process your choice of pet name, yet as soon as he processes what you had actually called him, not even for the first time tonight, Jongseong's heart finally stops aching in agony when he realizes the weight those two little words carry. 

"Your...love?"

Yet, he remains hesitant because maybe it's a term you use for your friends he hasn't heard yet or you don't actually mean it the way he thinks you do and after a night of such heart break and pain, he simply doesn't have the energy to fight his demons anymore. 

"Yes, Jongseong", you say confidently, pushing away slowly to look at him again, your heart thrumming in your throat at the mere thought of what you're about to tell him. 

It took you exactly eight weeks to realize that you're in love with Park Jongseong. You still remember the way you caught yourself staring at him from across the room, just watching his mannerism and movements as he engaged in a conversation with the head of the team you had just listened to. The second his gaze met yours, his eyes visibly softened and his lips even stretched into a tiny little smirk. That was the exact moment you knew that your silly little crush was a lot more than that and every day for the past few weeks he had managed to make you fall even more in love with him. 

The realization seemed scary at first, but now it's one of your most treasured emotions because nobody has ever made you feel as loved, appreciated, cared for and respected the way Park Jongseong has. 

As your eyes roam his handsome face, you take in the adoration and love gleaming in his pretty eyes, the ones you had found the home in you'd been searching for all your life. 

"I'm in love with you, Park Jongseong." 

You don't allow yourself to overthink and overanalyze your thoughts and decisions. Not this time. Not when you've never felt as sure about something as your feelings for the man you've waited for all your life. 

For a moment, however, you feel tiny jolts of anxiety making their way through your skin as Jay remains completely silent. 

Little do you know that this is the first time someone has ever said those words to him with such sincerity, such genuinity, such honesty. 

Little do you know Jongseong can't get himself to physically react yet because his brain has yet to get past the point of replaying the sound of you saying those sweet words and actually process them. 

Little do you know he has no choice but to remain reaction less, simply because he's never felt as happy as he does in this particular moment. His body has absolutely no idea what to do with all the serotonin rushing through his veins. 

"My Baby", he then finally breathes and lets out a soft chuckle, the tip of his nose reddening as tears of happiness blur his vision, "my pretty girl. My everything. The love of my life."

And there they are. The words he had used to describe you to his man in a moment of panic and anxiety, this time said with nothing but love and honesty, adoration and need.

"And I'm in love with you, Y/N."

Every doubt and worry that has ever crossed your mind in regards to Park Jongseong and his feelings for you suddenly vanishes. The only thing that matters is the fact that of all ways to call you, he's decided to give you a title so powerful and heavy in meaning, you can't even think of one that could ever come close to it. 

Just when you think there's no way this moment can get any more perfect than it already is, Jay suddenly reaches for your right hand, gently taking it into his own before lifting it to his lips and placing the softest kiss on your promise ring.

His eyes never once leave yours as he looks up at you through thick lashes, driving the mob of butterflies in your stomach even further into insanity with just a simple look. 

"And I promise to love you until my last breath and to find you in every life time. Thank you for giving me what I've been craving all my life, my perfect angel girl. Thank you for giving my soul the home it's been looking for all this time. Thank you for the privilege to be loved by you. It will forever remain my most treasured gift and something I won't ever take for granted."

You've always loved Jongseong's way with words but as he verbally expresses his love and gratitude for you, you can't help but gasp for air, too overwhelmed by a feeling so unknown yet so familiar. 

"Jay, I–", you stop mid-sentence as the tears get the best of you and the only thing to follow those two words is a soft sob of his name.

"It's okay, my sweet girl", Jong chuckles softly and pulls you closer against his chest before he places a firm kiss on your head, "I love you, too."

Not a single word is said after the as the two of you silently agree to take the sweetness of your love confessions into your drams, rather than the pain filled hours from earlier. As you bury your face even deeper in his neck, his strong arms wrapped tightly around your waist and his scent and warmth the one embrace your soul, you feel yourself slip into the best sleep you've ever had because despite everything that has happened, you've never felt as safe and protected as this. 

And when your breathing becomes lighter, Jongseong allows himself to let go of all the tears he had been holding back and finally fully indulge in the feeling of relief and gratitude that you turned out to be his person, after all. 

His home. His future.

← 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 — 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 — 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 →

(A/N: And here it is babies! I know you guys expected the worst so pls don't hate me, I gotta keep y'all on the edge to hit you even harder once we reach the actual big bang, bear with me 🤕🫣 honestly im not the proudest of this and i hope i didn't disappoint you guys, i promise i'll make up for the lack of smut soon!🫣 thank you sm for all the love and support babies, you're truly the best and i can't thank you enough. feedback is always appreciated!💞)

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