#I was too embarrassed to talk abt what are now my main ocs

[personasintro]

Everyone know jk love/loved kiko but i gotta agree at some point with the previous anon

Sometimes your answer towards the topic of oc and jk is kinda unnecessary like at that time you explained how jk is not jealous at benjamin, how you said in ch 52 that jk only said he want raw too with yn bc she looks embarrassed (implying not bc he want it as much as yn) or how sometimes when the anon being excited abt their progress to another step you always crashed it with your

i mean, sometimes you can just let this anon feel the way they want towards the story ?not everything need to be explained make it seems like you don’t like the idea whenever your readers think two main character in mh is taking another stage in their relationship and sometimes you seems to like jk and kiko story more than you do with your two main character

Lol I wasn’t gonna respond to this but here we go 🍿

I talked about this many times (my most used sentence this month it seems 🌚) but lemme explain for those who haven’t read those asks. About the jealousy; first of all, it happened every single time that there was another male character’s appearance or even slightly hint of something from Jk everyone jumped right away, yelling jealousy jealousy! I never said anything, I only even responded when ppl asked me or sent me asks about it. There were many moments when Jk wasn’t jealous and wasn’t JUST jealous. I remember very clearly I got a lot of hate for that too, when I said jealousy wasn’t the only thing he felt and he probably felt more things that were bigger than jealousy.

Now I absolutely understand everyone wanted him to get jealous, fall in love etc etc etc… but the thing is it’s my story and I know what I’m talking about when I’m having a conversation with readers. If you don’t like my answers or can’t accept them, just move on and don’t send me frustrated asks/messages. That goes generally.

I never said Jk wanted to 🥩 because he felt embarrassed for Y/N 😭 where did this come from? Sometimes I feel like you guys just assume bunch of stuff and can’t read between the lines.

You gotta understand I’m trying not to spoil anything and that’s why my answers are the way they are. And I’m not gonna change it because someone gets frustrated in my inbox. Certain things can be said nicely or don’t need to be said at all. I can’t believe I get a backlash for reacting a certain way someone doesn’t like. You gotta understand it’s none of my business how you react or that you have a problem with my reaction/response 😭

So everyone just chill out, get some fresh air and don’t read asks if it’s causing you such a problem 🍃

Peace out! 🦥

[genderwoods]

this is a long post talking about my ocs and my wip. feel free to skip!! i just want to get over my embarrassment of talking about them

ok so. to talk about my ocs first i need to talk about the world theyre in. this is still a nameless wip but for now im calling it 'through the mist' while i decide on a better name.

brief explanation about the world: its the modern world as we know, maybe a few years into the future, but its not very important because society and technology are still pretty much the same. the difference is that in this story, the earth was enveloped by a dark and mysterious mist that is invisible to most people. the origins of this mist is still unknown, but what is known is that: 1) it affects peoples health in the areas that the mist is the most dense, and the number of lung diseases and cancer has incresead ever since it appeared. 2) it has some type of dark magic to it. its essence creates demon-like creatures called spectrums (i still want to find a cooler name) that are unknown by most people, but they bring chaos to the world. you can read more about spectrums and understand them better here (please mind any grammar mistakes, it is still a rough draft!)

but there are special people in the world known as the Enlighted that not only can see the mist, but they are aware of the existence of the spectrums and are given special powers to fight them. most of these people are born like normal humans, and only when they grow up they start to realize that they are different and that theres something wrong in the world they live in. once they find out about their own powers, they are located by a institution called Lux Mundi, and they are recruited either to be a scientist and schollar that studies the mist and the spectrums, or to be a warrior and fight the spectrums.

there are three types of enlighted: the lumen (those who are born with paranormal abilities to help them fight the spectrums), the saltium (those who are born with advanced intellect and are able to understand the complexities behind the magic of the mist and the spectrums) and the granum (those who are both lumen and saltium at the same time. they are very rare.)

this is all you need to know to understand the ocs!! i wont say a lot abt their backstories here so to not make the post even longer but if you want to ask me anything about them, feel free!

btw all of these characters are brazilian and the story takes place in brazil bc well. im brazilian and it was easier this way.

also im not an artist so all i have are picrews 💔 sorry for the low quality of some pictures, for some reason tumblr wont show the album i have them saved in when i open the gallery so i had to screenshot.

1. Kaiki Vitorino, 17

she's our main girl! Kaiki was born Salvador, Bahia but moved to São Paulo with her mom when she was a kid. she and her mom were very close, but due to complications caused by a lung disease, she passed away three years prior to the story, and Kaiki had to move in with her aunt (who also lived in São Paulo). Kaiki is very kind and empathetic, she would never hurt a fly and puts other peoples feelings above her own (sometimes a little too much). she loves geology and has a cool rock collection. Kaiki is a lumen, and her powers are called 'Blessed be The Light', which is basically light manipulation. i won't dive in too deep about their powers here, but you can ask me if you want to!

2. Ayla Rodrigues, 17

Kaiki's best friend since childhood (and secretly love interest)! Ayla was born in São Paulo and met Kaiki in school. she has a very complicated family, which includes divorced parents and a dead younger sister, who died in a car accident with her dad when he was drunk driving. she doesn't speak to him anymore, and grief they dont know how to deal with has led her and her mom to a complicated relationship. Ayla is closed off, aloof and even arrogant to most people. When someone wins her heart however, she shows her more vulnerable side: she's a nerd, loves literature, music and cult movies, likes anime, and will do anything for her loved ones, especially Kaiki, who she is so in loved with is embarrassing. she is a lumen, and her powers are called 'Blesed be the Gravity', which is, you guessed! gravity manipulation.

3. Dandara Carvalho, 20

Born and raised at Lux Mundi, Dandara is the Head Trainer of the Lumen's division. Daughter of Eva Carvalho, supreme leader of Lux Mundi's instalations in Brazil, and Isaac Carvalho, Vice-Supreme and Head Counselour for the Saltium's division, Dara is the real deal: strong, disciplined, determined. she has been training since she was a kid, and her mom has always been very strict when it comes to this. Dara was trained by the old Head Trainer before her, an old man called Kaluanã. He was wise beyond this world, but after his passing at the old age of 80yo, Dara took over his functions. Eva wants Dara to be the next Supreme Leader, but all that she wants is to keep training and teaching other Lumens. They have a very strained relationship, but she gets along very well with her dad. Dara may seem intimidating, but she actually has a heart of gold: she's a dork who loves her friends to death and has a loud and weird laugh. she wont stand for injustice and is extremely reliable. shes also extremely, totally down bad for her girlfriend Yasmin. her powers are called 'Blessed be The Fire', but she also knows a lot of different martial arts.

4. Yasmin Senna

Yasmin may not be very impressive at first, but those who know her know that she is, in fact, a genius. Born and raised in São Paulo, Yasmin has always been the pride and joy of her family: as a kid, she was mostly quiet and kept to herself, didnt talk to other kids a lot and prefered to spend the day cracking her toys open to see how they worked. Her bad social skills and reclusion made her an easy target for bullying in elementary school – kids would take her toys away and mess with her all day long. this lead to a fatidic accident where one day she had a meltdown and unleashed her powers, 'Blessed be the Sound', a type of soundwave manipulation, and left everyone in the scene, including her, deaf. nowadays, yasmin uses hearing aids, but she has long ago gotten used to being deaf, and she doesnt mind her disability, but feels extremely guilt for the accident. she's the grandaughter of kaluanã, daras old mentor, but she had only know him as a kid before he moved to Lux Mundi. this is what made dara want to get closer to her at first, but then they feel in love. yasmin is extremely smart – in fact, she is a granum, but she refuses to use her powers, so she only works in the Saltium division.

5. Eric Senna, 19

Yasmin's twin brother, Eric is probably the only out of the Lux Squad that has decent social skills. He's charming, charismatic, funny, smart and has the world's biggest ego. Eric carries a lot of guilt over the bullying that happened with Yasmin, because he feels like he was too weak to protect his sister, so he has kind of become overprotective over her, even this kind of pisses Yasmin off (and Dandara too). he's one of those people that always act like they're the best, but deep down are their own worst enemy. he's talented, has a hundred different hobbies and speaks three languages. eric is always down for challenges and he loves to prank people. he has a cat and dog relationship with Dandara: they're always fighting and bickering, but they truly care for each other a lot. Eric is a lumen and extremely insecure about his powers – 'Blessed be the Thunder', electricity/lightining manipulation – because no matter how much he trains, his powers doesn't seem to get stronger.

These are the 5 main characters kf my wip! WOW ok this was. a lot. If someone has actually read untill now. thanks a lot, and let me know if you have any questions about anything in my wip or about my ocs! I love to talk about them!! :D

[koinotame]

\o/

hi! it's me, nana / koinotame!

if you're wondering why i went inactive and then deleted, my mental health kind of (really) tanked... and i ended up deleting my blog in a fit.

it's getting better bit by bit though! and i've been wanting to get back into writing (and talking abt my unhinged/yan ideas i can't really talk to anyone else abt), so. here i am! for now, at least

as for my previously posted writing, there's some good news and some bad news: the bad news is that everything i wrote directly into tumblr (99% of snippets, a lot of ask answers, most exact content warnings, etc) is gone. the slightly less bad news is that iirc there were very very few posts of mine that weren't reblogged by anyone at all, so they're probably still out there? feel free to send them my way if you find any and i'll rb them. @/midnight-remembrance also has reblogged a couple of them! there's a couple snippets i have saved in some places, so i might repost those on my own as i find them, but there's very few of those. the good news is that anything longer (proper writing — oneshots, hcs, yan alphabet responses and so on, prompt responses, etc) is safely backed up where i originally wrote it! some of it is also on my ao3, which is the same username. feel free to send me asks about any you'd like to see again and i'll repost them! i might not post them if i feel too embarrassed about/wish i hadn't posted them, and i might rewrite/heavily edit some of them, but i think there's only a handful that fall into the former category and none of them were particularly popular. either way, no harm in asking!

as for some other updates: i'm a little divided on whether i want to keep posting explicit nsfw or not so we'll see. i might just keep it out of main tags. idk yet. regardless of what decision i make, this blog is still strictly 18+ and that will not be changing. since we can reply from sideblogs now, this is a sideblog and not my main now. why? sometimes i prefer to check up on a blog frequently instead of following them for a couple of reasons, but this felt very awkward when they were following me. so this being a sideblog relieves a bit of that stress. if this makes it sound like i have severe brain worms, it's because i do. to that effect though, if we interact every so often feel free to consider us mutuals regardless of whether or not i'm actually following you =w=b tbh i.............. am not really into genshin anymore. i might post about it here and there but i just Do Not (really) Care about it anymore. scara aside to some degree i also have no clue what's going on post inazuma lol whatever projects or commitments to writing or etc i had made beforehand. i forgot all of them so just pretend that never happened ok? ok i'll also probably be posting more sparsely, but we'll see! and (this is obviously the most important bit) i have no clue where i put the mika edit so we're back to my og classic pfp. the header scales terribly and is temporary, please ignore that too

all that aside, as a treat for anyone who sees this in time,

*roughly 6/22 done, but fairly quick to write. roughly one paragraph per character (sneak peek line: "it's not too hard to be discreet with his unique magic when someone really deserves to fall face down a flight of stairs. or three. oopsie. odd they don't remember it, huh? well, he had nothing to do with that.") **more realistic isn't quite the right word(s)... probably won't post this one to the main tags regardless. won't be doing all of the characters (only important/relevant ones) and won't be writing more about/expanding on, so this one is just like. a one off experiment sort of thing. overall less violent than most takes on the au + leans a bit (or lot, depending on how you look at it) more on the religious aspect of self aware aus. i wrote a couple paragraphs a while ago, then rewrote them, but i'll only finish/post them if there's interest for it (sneak peek line: "aether has deluded himself and cast You aside entirely on his own—and when You finally grace them with Your real presence, zhongli is certain aether will be the first to fall from Your grace.")

i have one other new thing immediately ready for posting that'll get posted in a couple of days but that one's pretty silly

[vonkarma2]

1, 23, 27 for the oc questions?

This contains super old drawings so I’m putting it under a cut, beware my middle school art. Thanks for asking these were fun to answer :)

1. Your first OC ever?

I’ve answered a similar question to this a couple of times before, and I mentioned like the ocs I made when I was like 8 years old. This time, I wanted to use like my first legit developed OC who I put effort into building as a character (this was when I was 13-14), but I wanted to put a specific drawing of her that I was really proud of at the time and I couldn’t find the notebook it was from, so maybe another time. Instead, here’s my wings of fire OC I made when I was 11. Her name is Bobcat and I did not put any effort into building her personality at all unfortunately. 

From this image I assume she was nice, but who is to say. I like talking about really early ocs though bc sometimes there’s not even a concept I just drew a person with random shapes on their face or outfit and then like an out of context line of dialogue and that was it. It’s also like fun to see the ideas I came up with that I have NO memory of whatsoever. I made a couple of sparkledog type characters and drew them each once and never again. I had no idea I ever did that it was news to me

As you can see the one on the left is fire themed (he was a supervillain) and the one on the right is technology themed (superhero). I found this context from the writing on the page which I cropped out bc it is dialogue I wrote at age 12

23. Introduce OC that has changed from your first idea concerning what the character would be like?

Ok let’s see I’ve talked abt Angel and Gloria before so who’s left… I don’t think I’ve talked abt Daisy before. The like cyberpunk style characters originated as an idea for a DND campaign I had, and then decided to write out instead. However, I only came up with like one character, so I abandoned the idea. Coming back to it like 8 months later, I made it sci-fi themed instead. The first character I had like solidified was Remy, who was a pop star basically. For some reason, I later on came up with an incredibly similar idea of a like super rich diva girl type. Not only was this almost exactly the same as him, the design was also very very difficult to draw. So I was like ok this isn’t working so I redrew the character a couple of different ways, and one of them was like a repairman type character with super curly hair, who I thought looked cool, so I basically replaced everything abt the character (personality name gender backstory) except narrative role + role in the heist itself (<it was a heist at the time it’s not anymore).

Also Anjara was originally an ace attorney oc (<from when I knew absolutely nothing abt ace attorney but I had seen objection funk) with like a smug personality but then became like a samurai type personality instead.

27. Any OCs that were inspired by a certain song? 

Yes. Many. An embarrassing amount. My creative process is essentially listening to a song I like that doesn’t have anything to do with any of my ocs, so I come up with a new oc  to channel the emotion through. To better enjoy the song. I don’t do this as much now though because 1) I already have a lot of different ocs to cover various song types 2) I’m better at developing characters from nothing I would say. But enough abt that let’s get into specific songs.

every like sci fi oc I have: daft punk around the world/harder better faster stronger from alive 2007

Laura: Dynasty by rina sawayama 

Saida: Grace Kelly by Mika. She’s totally different from her original characterization. It used to be like she had no sense of identity and now she’s like, the complete opposite of that LOL

Melanie: baby one more time by Britney Spears, not because her character had anything to do with the song whatsoever, but because at the time I had a bunch of ocs that were just like visual designs made for fight scenes I would choreograph in my mind. To songs. So her design, but not personality, was one of the ones I made for this. Later on it was Honey I’m Home by Destroy Boys

Tane: The Pop Team Epic OP and also Ironina by nilfruits

Aurelia: Wonder What She Thinks of Me by Chloe x Halle, which is interesting in that that song has a very specific and obvious story which the character here has pretty much nothing to do with. Vibes I guess and massive recontextualization

Henry: Friends in Low Places by Worthikids even more egregious than the above since that’s literally a character song abt an ocs backstory. It was also very recontextualized

Luke: Electric Feel Justice Remix

^This is all a little embarrassing to admit, but I’m not going to lie on ocs ask memes I take ocs very seriously. Also I like how it said “an OC” and I just completely ignored that

[angrylizardjacket]

Yaaasss!!! Jelous Ben was si cuteee and we love a supportive mother, her mom is fantastic and a savage. I hace a question, how did you come up with reader's character in x-men?? I legit googled it as I thought it was a real character, so welk done.

i love her mum so fuckin much, dude, she’s supportive but can still be embarrassing at times. i wrote her, not like my actual mum, but like my dad now that i think about it. dude literally told me over the phone that he’d physically fight people for shittalking me (not just in general, there’s more context, but the point still stands). idk i think it’s disingenuous to not let parental characters have certain flaws, like they’re allowed to be overprotective and spiteful, as well as caring and supportive. i love her too.

oH SHIT DUDE LEMME TALK ABT MY GIRL CASSIDY TEMPLE I LOVE HER SO FUCKING MUCH AND I”VE PUT SO MUCH THOUGHT INTO HER THAT THIS WILL HAVE A READ MORE

so cassidy’s powers are actually based off of an xmen oc i’ve already written 70k about, Aoibheal Cassidy, younger sister of Banshee, Sean Cassidy, and Cassidy Temple’s name is a reference to her, since originally I was going to essentially have Y/N playing Aoibheal (because it’s my fic and i can include an homage to my xmen oc as a treat). the powers themselves are based loosely on Multiple Man from X-Men: The Last Stand, except Cassidy’s clones can’t live a life of their own like his can. In the xmen fic, aoibheal starts off with having unlimited clones, and they can explode because i thought it was neat tbh.

From the original fic, Molotov Heart, chapter 3, rubatosis:

[Context; humans experimenting on mutants between X-Men First Class and X-Men Days Of Future Past have caught Sean and Aoibheal and they experiment on them even though Aoibheal’s powers have not manifested (she is approximately 13) and they kill her brother in front of her]:

Stunned into silence, she can feel something white-hot building inside of her, all the rage and fear and pain becoming almost tangible.

She mutates.

Copies of Aoibheal, clones, appear around them, filling up the space between the now screaming and bewildered 'doctors'. Aoibheal herself doesn't seem to notice the clones, bawling her eyes out, an action the clones themselves are mirroring, and she thinks of nothing but freedom and escape, focusing on the white-hot feeling inside of her until it overwhelmed her. With the force of a bunker-buster bomb, the clones began to combust, began to explode, first a few, and then all at once. Killing the human personel who had kept her hostage, the blast reduced the warehouse to mere cinders, freed Aoibheal and left her clothing in tatters, but she was alive damn it.

The reason Cassidy has a limited number is because i needed a way to have her powered up as a horseman, like a distinct power up, rather than just something unseen like heightened reflexes and strength. 

I would like to point out also, that it’s not stated, but Cassidy’s explosions (NOT AOIBHEAL’s) are never to do with heat, they’re always about force. the explosions themselves are never hot, never have anything to do with fire or anything like that, she builds up force inside of the clones, and lets it tear her apart from the inside out as a wave that destroys the things it comes into contact with.

The scream was originally hereditary, like Banshee, it developed as her secondary mutation.

From the Marvel Wiki:

The Secondary Mutation (or "Second Mutation") is a phenomenon in which an existing mutant undergoes another mutation, gaining additional powers, such as healing, or a change in appearance.

Secondary mutation is noted as the appearance of new powers, or an increase in existing powers.

It was stated by Beast that the secondary mutations usually occurred in the twenties of the subjects, and generally appeared in time of great stress.

From the original fic, chapter 8, nodus tollens:

The appearance of the secondary mutation:

The world falls apart in a blur of movement. The gun goes off just after Raven jumps and makes a break for the window, the bullet curves as she crashes through the glass, following her on the way down. Tackling Erik earns Hank a mean right hook to the jaw, but Aoibheal’s there, looking at Trask like a dear in the headlights, memories whipping through her head like a hurricane - the sick fuck looks pleased to see her – her mouth falls open and she screams. She and the clone scream in tandem, their voices supersonic as the surrounding people clutched their ears for dear life; struggling to keep a hold of the feeling in her chest that caused her to explode, the clone detonates like a firework, scorching the wallpaper while Trask is stumbling to the door. There’s blood leaking from his ears but Aoibheal can’t move, can only scream and relive the memory of her brother’s murder over and over again.

Hank discussing it:

"I've never seen a secondary mutation so vastly different!" No longer blue or furry, [Hank’s] smile is excited as he looks over at her. Sharing the cockpit feels almost familiar by now, with Aoibheal curled up in the passenger seat nursing a glass of water. "It makes sense though, your original mutation – the explosions – would be an extension of your temperature immunity, but your secondary mutation is hereditary."

Cassidy’s scream, however, unlike Banshee’s, only effects things with ears, not inanimate objects like glass. Of course she could learn the right pitch to get glass to shatter like an opera singer, but generally speaking, her scream only effects things that can hear. 

OKAY LETS TALK ABT THE STUFF I FABRICATED FOR THE FIC

oh GOD I WANT TO TALK ABOUT HER RELATIONSHIP WITH MAGNETO

not as in romantic, as in he is literally her character’s main inspiration in the films. i’m literally making a fake trailer right now that’s intercut with moments from his DOFP speech that was broadcast to the whole of america.

i love dofp (possibly to my detriment) but i always thought it was weird that no-one was ever like.... magneto has a point. BECAUSE HE HAS A POINT. he’s speaking directly to disenfranchised and SCARED mutants across the nation, and yet everyone’s heralding Mystique as the new face of mutant kind. YES she made a point, but like.... did no-one vibe with magneto when he promised the destruction of mankind? i would. anyways.

so i thought it would be interesting for this character, Cassidy, to have this hero-worship of Magneto, taking his words to heart like scripture, ultimately making her a foil for Phoenix, Xavier’s protege. 

it’s why i specifically included this:

“You should be,” you hissed, putting your all into the words as you spoke them, and you hear Ben inhale sharply beside you, “we shall inherit the Earth.”

“What follows is a struggle as Cassidy and the figure – revealed to be her clone – proceed to kill the man. When they’re finished, and the man’s dead on the ground, Cassidy straightens her outfit, and we hear –“ as the director reads, Michael begins to slowly clap, “a slow clap, and it’s revealed that Apocalypse, as well as Storm, Angel, and Magneto, had all witnessed the event.”

“We are the future, we are the ones who shall inherit the Earth,” Michael reads as he stops clapping.

“Magneto,” you breathe reverentially, and when you look to him, you and Michael share a sharp smile.

which is a direct quote from magneto’s speech in Days of Future Past:

You built these weapons to destroy us. Why? Because you are afraid of our gifts. Because we are different. Humanity has always feared that which is different. Well, I'm here to tell you, to tell the world, you're right to fear us. We are the future. We are the ones who will inherit this earth, and anyone who stands in our way will suffer the same fate as these men you see before you. Today was meant to be a display of your power. Instead I give you a glimpse of the devastation my race can unleash upon yours. Let this be a warning to the world. And to my mutant brothers and sisters out there, I say this; no more hiding, no more suffering. You have lived in the shadows in shame and fear for too long. Come out, join me. Fight together in the brotherhood of our kind. A new tomorrow, that starts today.

which ALSO is what turns her into the next big villain for the franchise, because she sees Magneto, the man she kind of thinks of like a god, turn on and help kill Apocalypse, the man who claimed to be an actual god, and side with the people who, ultimately, don’t want to destroy the human race like she does, and also killed the man she loved. she takes Magneto’s ideologies and turns them up to 11. he fucks off to create a mutant paradise away from prying eyes and is happy, she won’t be happy until all humans are punished.

it’s why, in the beginning, she and raven can’t still work together, because raven wants to rescue mutants, but not at the expense of unnecessary human lives, and cassidy sees all humans as complicit in the torture, and therefore deserving of punishment. 

she has deemed herself judge, jury, and executioner of human kind, and they have all been found guilty.

i’m so excited to see if i get around to writing some of the next film because i really want to explore the dichotomy of Xavier’s ‘no-one is ever really gone/there’s always hope’ and magneto’s ‘you were right to be afraid of us, we are the ones who shall inherit the earth’. Everyone has given up on Cassidy in one way or another, whether it be by betrayal or death, and so when she finds this symbiote who literally becomes a part of her, makes her stronger, and is happy to kill people with little regard for who they are, she’ll take it. 

EDIT: here’s the first 26 seconds of the fake trailer (Y/N here is played by Jurnee Smollett, aka Black Canary from Birds of Prey)

ANGEL & RIOT

i wanted y/n to kiss ben hardy that’s literally it. 

actually no that’s not it 100%, i think it’s super amusing in a kind of bleak way that he got fridged for her, like his death, both in the “””comics””” (as in the comic universe for the fics) and in the film, causes her to seek out a force that would help bring him back to life. in the “””comics””” she originally seeks out a mutant, but when the mutant who can bring people back refuses to help her, she’s told of experiments at The Life Foundation, who are working on engineering the next step in human evolution, and she’s thinking that they’re experimenting on mutants again, like trask, and goes in guns blazing, but instead finds symbiotes. she bonds with a symbiote, thus becoming Riot Control, and the symbiote initially promises her all these things, including being able to find a way to ressurect angel, but eventually (in the “””comics”””) the power he gives her overtakes her need to ressurect her love, and riot ends up using her to try and build a ship to bring more symbiotes to take over earth.

IN THE FILM

okay OKAY okay OKAY so she’s looking for a way to ressurect angel at first, but riot’s in her ear while he’s seeing all her memories, and is convincing her to get revenge on the people who are responsible for his death (nightcrawler, jean, and Magneto specifically) so its not that the xmen are just in the plot by happenstance there’s like actual beef, love it. 

I also love that Cassidy��s powers are handicapped when she’s got Riot, since her scream would injure or even possibly kill him. Yes i specifically paired her with a symbiote for that reason, which is also the reason why her clone explosions aren’t heat based. 

but anyway, can i spoil the ending? i wanna spoil the ending;

so there’s this big showdown between riot control and the xmen, and jean confronts cassidy, trying to talk her down like ‘what would angel think if he saw you? What you’ve become?’ and Cassidy’s furious, thinking that jean’s trying to guilt her, like, angel would be so ashamed

“Keep his name out of your fucking mouth, you have no idea what he’d think-”

“He’d be terrified of you.” And it’s so fucking like, cruel and cold coming from Jean.

“Shut up.”

“You have become a monster; you have maimed your idol-” [we cut to a shot of magneto looking all fucked up and bloody, watching with anger in his eyes] “and you have left Angel for dead. If you’d really cared about him, you would have already gotten him back. Instead, you come for revenge against the people who could have helped you -”

or something like that, and riot control has a whole breakdown, lashing out, snarling that no-one could help her, and when they tried, they ended up dead (angel, apocalypse) and she starts losing control, and her voice starts to distort in and out of riot’s, making it clear he’s taking control of her completely. 

there’s this big, final fight, which culminates with jean grabbing cassidy’s face and trying to burn riot out of her.

“No-one is beyond help.” And Jean’s like, got tears in her eyes, desperate to save this girl who’s caused so much pain, but who sees herself as so wretched and beyond help, and we see the symbiote burning away and screaming, but also the physical signs of cassidy’s mutation as like, peeling away in embers, like the black scales around her eyes, and the way her whole eyes are seen as black is now clearing away, and she takes both of Jean’s hands and forces her to keep holding on, to keep looking in her natural fucking eyes for the first and last time as she burns out too.

“You can’t save everyone.” and then Cassidy’s just ash in the wind.

also this ending, in a meta-sense, makes sense, because after this Disney buys Fox and there’s no more this-universe X-Men films, so they had to do a self-contained story, there couldn’t be things left super unresolved.

OR maybe she’s fine, maybe she gets saved and riot burns out of her (spoilers, he fucks off and doesn’t die, hence, Venom (2018); it takes him about 20 years to recuperate) i haven’t decided.

[edurnehaeon]

💕🎶FE?

Oh u want to embarrass me on main I see 😳 /s ty for the asks jsjsjsj

💕 Tell us about one of your favorite characters and why you like them

This is so obvious since half of my fire emblem reblogs are him but yea Sylvain 😔 I rlly don't understand why bc he's a straight white man in Canon and a misogynist lmao but I think it's the ✨trauma✨ ( tw : child/sexual abuse/self harm )

Like he's actually very well written ( according to fire emblem standards lmao ) as a survivor of child abuse his own family... The way he pretends everything is fine but once in a while lets slip out that he's Not Fine and copes by sleeping around ( imo it's more self harm than anything since he sees himself as worthless because of his crest... ). Like it doesn't justify his behavior with women but idk it's very interesting.

Also his relationship with his brother is very dense and I feel very sad for him when he's still convinced everything is his fault ( even his own abuse 😔 ) and can't be mad at his brother for Trying To Kill Him...... And yet he still has to kill Miklan and obvs it takes a toll on his mental health. I looked at Japanese translations of his paralogue/another chapter with miklan's bandits I don't remember, and like it could sometimes be interpreted as sexual abuse is even more awful when u see how is relationship with sex is now. Oof

And ofc it's even worse after the timeskip and EVEN worse if he has defected from the blue lions since he left his childhood friend behind ( forgot to talk abt it in the last ask but the faerghus 4 rlly give me serotonin too.... I like their dynamic ) so even more angst and it is delicious ( because imo joining Edelgard is the best option for him on the long term ). The way he doesn't try to hide it anymore and just says "I'll fight like I want to die 👍"..... Yea. Also his defeated enemy quote is so raw like... "Burn until we meet again" Sylvain you're not okay see a therapist please 😔

On a less serious note I have a thing for flirty slutty characters LMAO. He also reminds me of one of my favorite OCs... Also I'm reading an extremely sexy sylvix fic rn ( Wander the Wild whereby on ao3 )

🎵If your hyperfixation has songs/an ost, what's your favorite song from it?

Indomitable Will/The Apex of the World for fe3h I think. I'll have to admit I had to look them up lmao none of the FE3H songs amazed me like they are good but they... Sound Fire emblem lol. From FE Fates I rlly like Azura's song tho

[badberry-rp-partner-search]

RP PARTNER AD!!! (OwO)/

HEWWO!!! Folk call me Chicky or Bean! Sometimes Carm- it depends! But I’m in search of an rp partner! I’ve looked through tumblr a lot when it came to rp ads and through this hellsite I’ve found a lot of genuine partners that I now view as some of my closest friends. BUT LIFE HAPPENS!! So now I’m back and looking for another partner and maybe if I’m lucky a friend!

So I’ve never? Written an? Ad? Before??? Usually I just reply to them- So if I miss something you’re interested in feel free to DM me here later and I’ll answer!

Okay A little Abt Me so you know what you’re getting into:

I am currently 19, and doing school full time. I’m a Theatre Major and identify with she/her pronouns (if? Thats important? To some people it is- to me personally I am accepting of the entire gender spectrum.) Being as I’m currently in school please be understanding if I’m not online 24/7- I promise I’m usually pretty present and I’ll let you know if something comes up. In other news- I am filled to the brim with chaotic bisexual energy (yes we stan bisexual awareness and acceptance in this HOUSEHOLD. P L S.) UhhhhHHhhh I’m not sure what else to put here. If you have any other like questions? Lmk? HOPEFULLY we’ll get to know eachother if I catch ya fancy!!!

Now for the fun BITS( WHAT I’M LOOKIN FOR):

-I write in and prefer third person rps! Honestly with length PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don’t leave me with like a two sentence reply if I write a page. That’s all I ask. Most of my replies tend to be 3/4 sizable paragraphs give or take!

-I’ll rp with anyone as young as 17 and as old as 25. If you’re older than my step-brother I’m sorry I dont think I’d be very comfortable rping with you.

-Because I know that everyone has a life outside of RPs and things I dont expect a reply every day. I do full time school- I GET IT. But I do like to hear from my partners at least a few times a week. If not only for the memes bc I DO send cat pictures and Pinterest chaos that I find.

-I cannot express HOW MUCH I LOVE HEAD-CANONING. Even if it doesnt pertain exactly to the rp? I ADORE IT. I love useless facts about your characters- or dumb ideas in passing. Cute scenarios or things that have aBSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH WHATS HAPPENING IN THE MAIN PLOT. I’m a sap for character connections and I will send stuff about the potential there.

- As far as pairings go? I do it all! I have SO many ocs with so many gender identities and sexual orientations that as long as you’re open minded then we can rock and roll! I’m open to m//, f//, m/f, nb pairings, gender fluid(i have a few fluid babes myself), etc etc! Lmk whats up!

-I ONLY do Oc rps- So sorry to canon/oc or canon/canon. I thoroughly enjoy the worlds and the AU opportunities, but I don’t think I would feel comfortable there. THAT BEING SAID I have several fandoms that would make for FANTASTIC AUS.—

-Here are a few groups with AU POTENTIAL THAT I THRIVE FOR:

+ Haikyuu!! (If you’re a hq fan I will die. I lO VE THIS SHOW)

+ Pirates of the Caribbean (pirates!au got me like oooOooooOOo)

+ Tonari no kaibutsu-ken (My Little Monster) <- (another all time fave. Its so cute and good. Nothin like a babey asf slice of life to make my big stoopid heart soff)

+ Harry Potter (yes I’m a hoe for hogwarts au. The p o T e n t i a l.)

+ INU x BOKU SS (Inu x Boku Secret Service) <- (THIIISSSSSSSSSSS A A A AA A AAAAA GIVE ME THAT SPIRIT TEA)

+(There’s probably more, but I’m blanking rn big oof. DM ME IF YOU’RE CURIOUS ABOUT A FANDOM AND WHERE I STAND WITH IT AS FAR AS AUS GO. B c there’s a solid chance I have heard of it and I a m 100% willing to build an au with you around it!)

ANYWAY abt Ocs- I LOVE MY KIDS. And I’ll love YOUR KIDS. I LOVE OCS IN GENERAL. I draw art of my dumbasses all the time and if we hit it off real good and I feel mega inspired I’ll draw art of our kids interacting. (No promises but like y e e t)

I say this bc I do have an art blog that I’ll link at the very end of this mess so you can see and meet them. If you have an art blog too? I would LOVE TO SEE IT. AND FOLLOW YOU!! I wanna explore potential together!

Okay okay so I think? At the end of these people usually put like the potential rp ideas they have and I got a couple, but honestly if you have something you’re curious about exploring tell me about it!! I’m eager to see what ideas you have and we can build something together!!

Royals!AU

— (royal/servant)

— (royal/bodyguard)

—(royal/peasant)

Vampire!AU

—(vampire/thrall)

—(pureblood/turned)

—(pureblood/rogue)

—(hunter/vampire)

—I have some original worlds when it comes to vampires that have exploring potential!

A/B/O

—I think the world is sUPER CUTE. I know a lot of it is smut (nothin wrong with that ig) but like the fluffy bits are quality and here we stan some f l UFF.

Pirates!AU

— Captain/First Mate

— Pirate/Siren

— I know this lowkey loops up to Pirates of the Caribbean!au, but we dont have to follow the movies lore which is sorta why i put it like? Separate?

Detective/Criminal

— Detective/Thief

—Retired!Criminal/ Detective (working on Criminal’s case)

I CANT THINK OF ANYTHING ELSE RN!!

Okay! So this is sorta the end of my ad I think! If you made it this far and you’re interested Uh TEA! I am SO EXCITEDDDDD! If you’re genuinely interested, follow, and like this post and acct, then send me a message here!

I only rp through Discord, but I won’t leave my discord info here. After we talk a little in the tumblr dms and you tell me a little bit about yourself and what you like then I’ll hand it over and we can GET TO BRAINSTORMING!!! YAYYY!!!

ANOTHER THING! Bc i know that tumblr is a chaos site that never puts a date on ANYTHING and I have LIVED THROUGH THE EMBARRASSMENT OF MESSAGING SOMEONE IN THIS RUSSIAN ROULETTE OF HOW LONG AGO DID THEY POST THE AD I’M GONNA PUT THE DATE HERE WITH MY ART BLOG LINK HERE.

August 31, 2019!

[8eht]

3, 22, 24, 35!

ok so this is super later bc it got pushed back in my drafts omg :(((

3. do you prefer writing oc’s or reader inserts? explain your answer.

neither safhjgafhajsfa. i actually dont really like either. there’s really no true answer other than im just really uninterested. i actually used to be really weirded out by ri’s but im not really anymore. i can understand the appeal but i really 99% of the time i dont want to read them. 

but with ocs i mean, if they are minor like a parent or w/e its totally ok and i actually do that too.

but i like to read/write fanfic bc i like the ppl im reading/writing abt. so i dont care for ocs or anything being a main focus.

22. do you have a story that you look back on and cringe when you reread it?

a little bit. nothing that i find really embarrassing. i probably will awhile from now. but i jsut started writing in nov so i havent had too much time to grow as a writer. at least not drastically. so i havent noticed too much of an improvement atm.

24. how do you feel about writing smutty scenes?

asfkjhasjfkhass lmao omg i just wrote my first one and i was screaming in my head the entire time. i had to pause and do like deep breathing exercises bc i felt so silly writing those words u know???

it was so funny and rereading it was so hard askfjhasjfkhas its so weird bc im not shy abt this stuff but for some reason writing it in a serious way is a whole new thing to me.

i think now though its going to be so much easier bc ive already broken that seal lmao

35. do you share your story ideas with anyone else or do you keep them close to your chest?

i usually will say very very little abt it. im normally really embarrassed to talk abt my ideas to ppl so i keep them to myself until i post it

idk whats so different abt telling ppl abt it beforehand vs posting it pubically, but im so nervous and shy abt talking abt wut i wanna write before i write it

[joulethieves]

deep breath remember when i said this would take me 5mins nevermind i wrote for an hour

tl;dr burmecian dragoon frately and his adopted hume daughter kipcha are hunters that speak several languages but speak french to each other. there’s a dog and a falcon involved that are kipcha’s weird pets. burmecians are an extinct race aside from frately after they defended marginalized groups across ivalice and slowly died off. kipcha and reddas probably have a Thing. kipcha yells at al-cid in rozarrian bc he owes her money cuz she was hired to spy with her multilingual skills before getting thrown into prison and recently broken out by the time the xii-timeline is close to an end , pre-pharos.

ok wheremst do i start with these two i’ll try to. keep it short. 

SPOILER I DIDNT KEEP IT SHORT 

kipcha is a hume in her late 20′s who is a huntress. she has a dog and a falcon has a pet. she lives in the mountains, i headcanon somewhere in rozarria, with her weird dad frately.

frately is , quite frankly, a ripoff of sir frately from ffix. like basically he is a burmecian. but in ivalice-verse, i headcanon burmecias/cleyrans as an extinct race. long long lonnnng ago, burmecians used to be protectors of sorts, of the downtrodden or endangered. they are dragoons so they slayed a lotta dragons threatening their land and the land of others. they were all around a super amazing good race of creatures. the viera, especially, consider themselves heavily indebted to them. many many years ago the burmecians defended eruyt from an attack from some force (i havent figured it out yet, either humes or wyrms) and thus helped build the barriers in golmore now. 

so in ffxii timeline, when fran sees frately, and frankly--when any viera sees frately, the only burmecian they’ve seen in many many many years (as they were rumored to be wiped out in some war)--she removes her helmet and bows her head in respect. bc even though the viera that he sees have left the wood, they still owe their lives to burmecians and there’s a deep respect for them as well as a quiet shock as to how he is alive. not sure if he’s the only burmecian who survived; i imagine there are others but perhaps he is looking for them

somewhere in the timeline after eruyt was defended long long ago, another attack on a village happened, a hume town in rozarria. savages were tearing through it, raping and pillaging and burning it to the ground. burmecians fought to eliminate the threat and save the people, but many were slain in their efforts. THE BURMECIANS WERE VERY BUSY FULL-TIME DEFENDERS OF ALL. they never slept. there was always shit to save. kipcha was a toddler at the time and her whole family was murdered, and frately saved her before hiding them both in the woods. maybe just about every burmecian was wiped out (idfk i really dont have it worked out in a timeline). basically, frately adopted kipcha, at a very young age. she was probably like 3. after that attack, they were both alone. he decided he’d take care of her.

fast forward and now kipcha is 20something and she hunts around ivalice with her weird dad. they have a giant big-ass cabin they both built on some lonely mountain and she doesnt get to talk to humans much. but she has her birb and her doggo and likes to kill shit with her dad. 

also frately speaks in a heavy french accent because i said so, and bc i headcanon burmecians as generally speaking french, also bc i created him as an OC in high school when i was learning french, also bc i do what i want and french is a language in ivalice altho it probably isnt called french it just sounds french. basically its a dead language its probably what the burmecians spoke.

 anyway they speak that to each other. she taught herself the main ivalician tongue and bugged him to learn it too. she doesnt speak with an accent but he’s lazy and old so he has a heavy one. also she speaks rozarrian and landisian and galtaean (what i headcanon as english i guess. she learned a lot of languages by books and travel and when she does meet other humes she loves to talk to them to test out her skills. she is very clever like that. languages come easily to her.

hmmm so anyway

reddas took over balfonheim 2 years pre-game. and there was an assassination attempt to get rid of him as he tried to make all these changes in balfonheim since he cleaned  a lot of it up. well, there was an attempt at an attempt for murder, at least.

 y’see, kipcha and frately were in balfonheim on a hunt and it was their first visit there. kipcha overheard two men talking in a foreign language no one could speak while in a bar, and understood they were trying to plot against reddas. she didnt know who reddas was but she’s literally so catty and didnt like how they looked at her so she snitched. basically she saved reddas’ life cuz it ended up being a huge plot to kill him. 

from then on kipcha got on reddas’ good side but was labeled a snitch by others. she doesn’t really care tho, but sometimes it grates her. lots of people call frately a rat bc of how he looks as a burmecian, and because of him partnering with kipcha to snitch, but i dont think the namecallers understand how tall he is cuz when he stands up from his barstool he is literally like almost seven feet tall he is so tall dude. 

kipcha is average like 5′6″ or something but frately is gigantic. he used to give her piggyback rides and jump around when she was a kid and she squealed in delight but he calls her too fat now (she isnt, but he teases her). kipcha is very sassy, outgoing, and mislabeled as “confident” when really she has no concept of how to act in public since she is never around people so she’s generally just a loud weirdo. she carries her dog around in her arms and ppl are like “omg is ur dog ok” and shes like “he’s fine i just like carrying him around like a baby” . she has a bird, a falcon named [redacted (im honestly so embarrassed by a lot of this)], she flies around sometimes and brings kipcha things like dead rats and random rings. kip has a bohemian sort of style about her and wears a bunch of shit the bird finds. 

because kipcha can speak a lot of languages she was then hired by al-cid to do some spying for something or other, shortly after the reddas stint, as word got out about her. she did the job, and got the info back to al-cid,  but she got caught and imprisoned. frately broke her out but it took over a year to figure it out. i also headcanon that the bird steals al-cid’s glasses in xii timeline during his brief stint in balfonheim. 

kipcha and frately are coined “fire ‘n ice” by most folks who are fond of them. kipcha is very hotheaded and loud. she is also a redhead. frately being of pallor skin and white hair and quiet temperament is therefore ice. whenever frately is embarrassed by her she likes to remind him he raised her and he likes to respond “i had nothing to do with this” in a very french accent.

 so reddas hasn’t seen her for over a year and a half before she shows up in the xii-timeline, broken out of prison, growing her hair out cuz they buzzed it off, and demanding money from al-cid bc he never paid her, but in his defense she was in prison. 

kip and frate show up late in-game and that’s the first time reddas sees her since she saved him, essentially i. sort of maybe ship her with reddas? but more like a “they totally banged once and she’s obviously nuts about him and clambers on his back and curls his sideburns around her finger while whispering in french in his ear” she’s honestly hilarious and frately facepalms a lot. frately and fran hang out. kipcha goes on a hunt with vaan and penelo and they becomes bff’s. hmmm. yeah anyway they show up late in-game to help with a hunt or an esper or like, they need kipcha and frately’s translating knowledge for something or other. idk kipcha is just happy to be out of prison and eating oysters and petting her dog. by the time she shows up in balfonheim ingame she’s probably been out of prison for a few months. oh no this got so long im sorry i think abt them every day they live in my head

[witchofdoom]

can i have 14 for auralia, 1 for chi and can i also like drop the bomb completely and do 8 for ama

Them in an uncomfortable outfit

P a n t s. (God what’s up w/ my ocs and hating pants)

It feels weird having fabric just. SURROUNDING her legs and making it so hard to shift vs like a dress or skirt. Pants in general just feel super restricting too?? Since ~under the sea~ clothing isn’t really a thing since it just gets wet so the more fabric the worse it is minus on the arms. But even then she doesn’t like the longer sleeves either? Mostly tight ones just....get off my skin blease.

Them as a child

I LOVE THAT U SENT THIS FOR HER AFTER I GOT IT FOR AMA JUST....THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE END OF THE SAME BAD HOUSE.....

Chi has always been a go getter, even without the guise of her parents she loves the praise and competition. Not as stoic as she is as a teen/adult tho she would be enthusiastic about new things and learning and just planning so many things for the future...

She was definitely a model student and someone a lot of people looked up and went to for help. She was a bit cold to people but more in the sense of just being blunt with her words. Tho maybe that added to her ~Cool and Collected Senpai~ vibe

But of course with the ever so much a piece of shit bad dad her enthusiasm turned more into doing it for the sake of doing it/being a chore? Like she still liked the praise, still liked pushing herself, still liked learning but when only the best of the best was expected of you it just became....annoying. But she would never dare to say that or go against wishes of her parents because they were her family they were her guardians they were the ones who taught her and raised her they were in the right!!! Right? And. TERRIBLE AS IT IS seeing Ama be more compromised with what their dad wants kind of placed a fear in her to not falter...

Weird thing to mention after that but she enjoyed sports a lot too!! She was in track in her middle school years + some stuff on the side for fun and joined her high school’s gal basketball team when she moved. Ofc she left this behind for the sake of LAW but she’s always been athletic as a kiddo.

Their interactions with their significant other(s), if they have them

Holy shit I. THIS IS REVENGE FOR MY ASK H U H. Alright this is gonna be a long one...

Maybe not rly super on topic but? To start off this long train of rambling to say that. Ama sees Meti as a knight in shining armor is an understatement??? Like even saying he’s that AND her prince charming is not even close to how much he means to her like....in the weirdest of wording he’s just her snuggle bunny....like he’s him and she loves him and u ever think abt someone u love so much u cry that’s her 24/7 probably.

EARLY ON in their relationship/knowing each other in general was?? Awkward. You got shouty mcfight guy and I’m crying on the inside anxiety incarnate but it oddly??? Worked out?? Like maybe it was because shared interests??? Maybe it was how opposite their personalities were they ended up balancing each other out??? Or just how strange their first meeting was??? Maybe how (even if the methods weren’t. SOMETHING SHE CONDONED) she kinda admired people who didn’t take shit or confident??? or even something more!! (Or. something that needs to be specified/worked on more since it was like 6 years ago and stuff changed om g) But it was basically just these two, honestly very broken people coming together to create something new and fix all the cracks in each other along the way, despite neither of them really knowing that they were there to begin with? Or how deep the damages were.

LIKE AS MENTIONED BEFORE Ama was. Not a very social person?? And failed with the interactions that came with it pretty often like hell their first meeting she was probably quiet for 75% of it....And hell even as friends she was super quiet but like she cares for ppl so much it still kinda showed just from her expressions and actions and the few words she DID say. Quiet mom friend. She liked being around him a lot??? Like ofc she enjoyed the company of the rest of the friend group but just....even the simplest of things they did together?? The stupidest of conversations (or i/g early on more like him rambling since...tfw super quiet and also the added fear of not knowing a language 100% and accent) and just him (u kno when he wasn’t. KINDA PUTTING HIMSELF IN DANGER) made her heart go doki doki....Despite her denying and denying like no wtf ur horrible u don’t DESERVE to have friends or even a crush :/// thinking that like he’s gonna like u back smfh :////

After knowing him (+ friends) for a bit she did become a little bit more open?? Like in the friend way tho like she still hid her issues like hell. It was like before where she was empathetic to everyone and stuff just a little more friendly...still like ummmm EVEN IF THEY LIKE U NOBODY (meti) WOULD EVER LOVE U. She did kinda hold back bc of that just umm u wanna lose a FRIEND too u fuck???? (This. Stupid summer child.....u fool....) Once they got together tho she was actually kinda?? The same as before but instead of ummm it was more like AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA///

I think this came?? A little bit after getting together but weird thing w/ Ama is that the closer u are to her the more she’ll actually speak up about things? Like her concern for you grows and she’ll put more of her own issues to stop u from doing fuck shit. So like she was still super caring and sweet but then the Mom Friend Attitude(tm) got mixed in a bit with that since. GESTURES TO METI, WHO FOUGHT PEOPLE JUST BECAUSE. And that probably kinda. opened pantrauma’s box of hell after a while of ‘ur gonna get hurt stop!!!’ just.....‘SOME PEOPLE??? FIGHT PEOPLE TO COPE???’ ‘wait what are u coping for-’ like that kinda showed that?? They trust each other enough to actually talk about this stuff despite not really realizing that?? Like...maybe not the root of the issues but maybe the mentality that lead to it and the start of healing for him?? Like she’s always been empathetic but it was something really new to just....see someone she cared about so much be like this and just wanting to help him....THO SHE HERSELF WAS STILL KINDA CLOSED OFF ABOUT HER OWN ISSUES AND TRIED TO HIDE THEM SINCE SHE DIDN'T WANT HIM TO WORRY AMA WHY...LIKE THIS IS STILL A THING EVEN IF WAY LESS...that sweet sweet abuse trauma I guess. She gets better with later years tho like with her feelings and even trauma at least but u h sweats at the medical issues that’s another story //horrayplz

Tries to....stay more vague tho bc this is getting long but like for the majority/still now she’s always been kinda dotting?? Like maybe not in a mom way now bc that’s weird but like in a spouse kinda way where she just wants him to be happy and safe and she def has gotten way better with speaking and is way more open about her concerns/feelings for him?? Like again with the balancing thing sorta she’s there to hold things back to make sure they don’t explode vs him who protects and maybe has things blow up just a little bit so it’s not brushed under the rug when something upsets her and will cause issues since she’s still super passive to things...But like her concerns come from nothing but a good place and just absolute pure love for him?

Also in terms of like affections she does like. Hold back a bit despite REALLY LOVING IT?? Like tbh it’s kinda rare for her to initiate stuff besides like hugs/hand holding/leaning against him and sometimes cuddling?? Morning/Goodbye/Goodnight kisses are smthing she’s more okay with doing too since it’s just quick and sweet and u don’t usually give a second thought to those....Even then she’s still so easily embarrassed like Ama blease you’ve been together for 6 years and in main verse ur married!!! Also god just in general she just....likes being near him or sitting next to him or laying against him and all that good stuff like her cheeks still kinda go redder than usual (bc fun fact!!! Ama’s cheeks are actually naturally rosy.) but it helps her relax and she feels so safe...HENCE THE WHOLE KNIGHT THING AT THE BEGINNING....

tl;dr bc god knows ppl need it: Ama just....loves Meti a lot. She cares about him so much and it’s a case of these two broken and lost people finding each other in such a cruel world and coming together to help fix each other while making something new along the way. She feels safe with him, she feels at home with him, she feels happy with him. He’s not her knight in shining armor, he’s not her prince charming, he’s not even her soul mate....he’s so much more than that he’s her snuggle bunny.